#and even the writing for foggy was sometimes a little weird
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since i finished the zdarsky dd run last night, here's my thoughts on it overall:
^mvp who deserved better
#anyway fuck this run#this might be my least favorite run of all time i hate it so much#like competing with shadowland levels of bad (and isnt it ironic that the plots of shadowland and the second series are similar...hm)#foggy and mike were the only pockets of joy to be found here#and even the writing for foggy was sometimes a little weird#i have so many thoughts but its just a big jumble atm
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Can I just say how much I love you??? Okay, that sounded weird, I love your work. It's immaculate, beautiful, and I absolutely love it. Thank you for writing, and I genuinely mean this.
Nowwwwwww.......
Can you write a Time Skip Iwaizumi x Reader where he just, like, loves your ass? Like he can't stop squeezing it and fucking you from behind? If you can't, that's okay, and if you can, I appreciate it.
Have a good day!!
a/n: first off, thank you sooooo much! you’re so sweet xx and not weird at all! your ask made my day. im sorry if this is a bit late :(
worship. (iwaizumi hajime x reader)
word count: 689
warnings: fem!reader, body worship, a lot of detail about asses lmfao, smut
Iwaizumi Hajime is a proud ass man.
He has no qualms admitting that fact. Some guys are into tits, and some guys are into asses. He appreciates a nice bottom, what’s the big deal? It’s not like he is excessively enthusiastic about it- until he meets you.
There’s just something about you. While he connects with you emotionally almost instantly, he is also hyper aware of how physically attractive he finds you. Every curve and dip of your figure is something he hungrily runs his eyes over, but none more so than your perfectly shaped ass.
Iwaizumi Hajime is not a dramatic person, but he swears he could sing hymns about your voluptuous butt. He can’t help himself when his gaze strays straight down to it when you walk into a room. He especially loves it in jeans or yoga pants, where the cloth hugs it so fucking perfectly. And when you two start dating, he is gifted with the sight of them in your silk sleeping shorts. All bets are off then. No power in the universe could stop him from reaching for you, feeling the soft silk and warm flesh give way under his hand as he squeezes it appreciatively. Your surprised yelp is merely a bonus.
When Iwaizumi fucks you for the first time, he has to physically hold back.
He takes you from behind, mind foggy and overcome with arousal, nearly going cross eyed at the sight of your ass bouncing on his cock. He has to slow down or he knows he will come embarrassingly quick, and he has to hold back from smacking your ass black and blue because it looks so delicious, so juicy. God, he needs to bite into it, but fuck, that would definitely freak you out.
Over the months, Iwaizumi realizes there is very little that could freak you out, and you encourage every one of his wild fantasies regarding your ass. In fact, you love it just as much, because when Iwaizumi has you bent over his knee, slapping the flesh over and over, your moans and tear filled eyes keep begging for more. And when he dips his fingers into your slit, it comes back so wet and shiny, it makes his own cock jump and throb.
And so Iwaizumi feels no obligation to hold back when he pounds his cock into your poor pussy, going harder and harder just to watch your ass bounce on his pelvis when it smacks into you. His grip is harsh and his smacks are even harsher, but you tighten around him so deliciously that Iwaizumi can’t help but let out a broken groan of his own. You are wrecking him, ruining him for anyone else, and he swears he can never, ever let you go. That’s the recurring thought in his brain as he empties his balls into you, pulling out to let the last few spurts coat your reddened asscheeks. And fuck, the sight might be enough to make him cum again.
Iwaizumi Hajime is nothing if not a gentleman.
He lays you down on your stomach after he’s done fucking you, shoves a pillow under your hips to tilt your ass up. He runs a warm, wet cloth over the sensitive skin, listening to how your breath hitches at the feeling. He bought a nice, flowery scented lotion as well, which he rubs in his palms to heat up, and then massages into your asscheeks, movements slow but firm, soothing the angry skin. You hum in approval at the action, and his lips twitch up into a smile.
Sometimes he thinks this aftercare is for him more than it is for you, because he is really taking his time to truly worship your ass, letting the smooth glide of the lotion move his hands, squeezing and rubbing at just the right places, every part of it getting attention. He bends forward to brush his lips over it too, tiny kisses that have you giggling under him. And if he playfully bites at it a bit, he knows you don’t mind.
He is the luckiest man in the world.
#iwaizumi hajime#iwaizumi x reader#iwaizumi smut#iwaizumi hajime smut#iwaizumi hajime x reader#iwaizumi x you#iwaizumi x y/n#haikyuu x reader#hq x reader#haikyuu smut#hq smut
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Sweet Blood: Bill Williamson X Male Reader
Fictober Prompt: Day 21, Blood/Murder
Pronouns: None Mentioned
Physical Sex: AMAB
Rating: E/Smut, violence
Warnings: Appreciation of Bill’s size, kissing, gunfight, blood, murder, oral sex, blow job, hint of anal fingering, mentions of bathing together, goofy fluff, Bill is clumsy
Summary: After a shootout Bill gets a little show that he enjoys more than he might expect.
If there is one thing Bill finds himself hating about Lemoyne, it’s the stupid confederate bastards that think they own the place. He was more than happy to go out riding with you, just spending time together. You’d been riding along, partly racing and generally messing around like fools until the bastards appeared out of the trees. Your horse slid to a stop, Brown Jack halting just behind. Before anything else, the raiders recognized the two of you from the gang and started shooting. Given how many of the bastards there were, Bill planned to run as much as he hated to, but your horse got scared and bucked you. And now he doesn’t even know where you are in the firefight.
He saw you get behind a rock and hasn’t seen you since, too busy getting Brown Jack out of danger and bolting for cover himself. His rifle needs cleaning and he wasn’t even planning on needing it today. Your shots help even if he has no idea where they come from. Halfway through, getting frustrated with his dirty rifle, he pulls his revolver. It’d feel a lot better if he could see you and know you’re not hurt. The last shot he lands lets his ears clear and the sounds of a struggle fill where the gunshots used to be.
Bill rushes, following the sounds of crunching leaves and labored grunts. He arrives just in time to watch you plunge your knife into the man above you, the man grasps at it but you drag it along his torso and his blood seeps out like a burst dam and he collapses. Bill, his head a little foggy, pulls the now dead man off of you. Your clothes are soaked in blood, splatters around your skin and hair, effectively covering you in red.
Bill stares for a moment before getting the sense to offer his hand. “Ya alright?”
“Yeah.” You groan as Bill helps you to your feet. “He came out of nowhere.”
That image of you essentially gutting the man flashes through Bill’s mind. “Bastard…” He mutters.
Bill watches you put your knife away, shifting on his feet in a bit of discomfort but he has no idea why. He knows you can handle yourself, if anything he sometimes likes watching you kill the fellers that deserve it. He writes it off as being worried about the horses and-
“Bill?” You say, making him look at you. “Did you just get hard from a gun fight?”
Bill feels heat rush to his face as he looks down and suddenly feels the ache. He’s about half hard, enough to strain against his pants for you to see. It wasn’t just the gunfight and he knows it. Sure, he might’ve rubbed one out after trading shots before, but this time he knows that seeing you stab a feller and get coated in blood had a hell of a lot to do with it. And he feels embarrassed because it’s weird to get off on shooting and stabbing… but you’re smiling at him and it makes his brow crease in confusion. He looks down, but can’t quite tell if you’ve gotten hard too.
“You want help, sweetheart?” You ask, your fingers digging under his gunbelt and pulling him closer.
Bill nods, grinning at the prospect of fucking in the aftermath of all this. He kisses you, his hands holding your face as your hand moves up to rid both of you of the hats that knock together. He feels hot all over, more than usual in the humidity, and he grips your hands to bring them to his shirt. You take the hint, unbuttoning it for him. He shivers as you hands run over his chest, sliding down to his stomach and lovingly squeezing at the extra fat there. He might fully collapse and melt under your touch one day, like snow in the summer, but for now he can keep his legs with the help of a large rock to lean against.
“D-Darlin’” He breathes heavily against your lips. “I want ya ta… can ya suck me off?”
You smile at him. Bill hates asking for things, much prefers to just let you do whatever you want with him, but he needs this. He needs to see you all bloodsoaked on your knees.
“We’re gonna have to get a bath or something after.” You say, looking down at the blood that now stains both of you. “Grimshaw and Dutch’d lose it if we walked around like this.”
Bill nods, giggling to himself. “Ya wanna share a bath?”
“Or a lake, I’m not picky.”
Bill kisses you sweetly before you kneel down in front of him. He scrambles to get his suspenders over his shoulders as you tug his pants down. Your hands leave blood in their wake, red stains settling in all the places you’ve touched and it makes Bill’s chest tight. His dick freed and his leg bare, he feels that tremble again and leans back more against the rock to keep himself up while you grip his thighs. You trail kisses over his skin, paying attention to his thickness with a care that makes Bill want to tell you how much he loves you but his mouth can’t quite form words, only lewd little noises that he tries to silence with his hand.
When you first lick at his head he nearly yelps, every sensation heightened by the fact that you’re in the aftermath of a shootout, out in the open, covered in blood, and Bill is half naked for anyone to see. He looks down and finds his hairy chest flushed pink, the only thing covered is his arms as his shirt hangs open. He’s been foregoing union suits since moving down into the humid south, and he’s a little glad for it when your hand wanders up to his hip to keep him still. The feeling of your fingers on his skin, damp blood smearing slightly, makes him groan into his hand. And when your mouth wraps around him, his legs finally give out and he falls on his ass.
“Shit!” He exclaims, looking up at you. “Sorry, shit that hurt.”
You cup his cheek, kissing him as if he hasn’t made a fool of himself. “I can see why we’ve only ever done this sitting down.”
Bill knows his face must be red by now, ears and all. “Y-Ya just… I can’t handle it, ya make me feel so damn good.”
“Just relax, Bill.” You say with a smile. “This just means I get to have those perfect thighs of yours around my head.”
“Ain’t nothin’-“
You shush him, stopping the self-deprecating comment and making Bill swallow the spit in this mouth. He settles his back against the rock, spreading his legs as you dip between them. He hesitates, but carefully puts his legs over your shoulders. He’s done it before but he’s always worried he’ll smother you or something, all you give him is encouragement. It feels amazing, allowing you to sink down so far onto his dick with only your own limitations in the way. You engulf him with the familiar angle, your nose pressed flush with Bill’s messy patch of pubic hair as he shivers and clenches his legs. Despite the weight on your back, you bob your head and use your tongue perfectly, Bill not able to think of anything else. You’re always perfect.
He can’t warn you, despite his effort too, all that comes out is a gasp as your finger traces around his rim, exposed from the slant of his hips. He releases down your throat and his legs clench around you, holding you in place as you swallow his cum and suck him through the pleasure. Bill goes limp when it’s done, his mind a fog and only faintly aware of your kisses on his thighs as you put his legs back on the ground.
“You really need a bath now.” He hears you mutter, the faint feeling of your hands buttoning his shirt accompanying. “Got dirt all over you now.”
Bill chuckles lightly, his senses coming back as he catches his breath. You help him stand on wobbly legs so he can pull his pants up. You catch him when he stumbles, keeping your arm around him like he’s drunk.
And when you put his hat back on his head he smiles bashfully. “Love you.”
“Love you too, lightweight.” You smile, pecking his lips.
“Ain’t like I’m drunk.”
“Might as well be with all this wobbling.”
Bill looks down at his feet. “Sorry.”
“I’m the one that did it.” You say, picking his head up to kiss again. “Now let’s get cleaned up.”
#red dead redemption 2#rdr2#red dead redemption x reader#bill williamson#bill williamson x reader#bill williamson x male reader#red dead redemption x male reader#x reader#x male reader#fictober#kinktober
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Hallow's Eve
Flufftober Day 24: Ghost AU
Matt Murdock x ghost!reader
Word Count: 1.5k
AN: This one really isn't my favorite but I think that's just because I'm not very good at writing Matt. Anyway... Reblogs and Feedback are always appreciated and I'll see y'all tomorrow.
divider credit @royallaesthetics
Matt didn’t celebrate Halloween, he doesn’t really remember when he stopped just that Stick thought it was childish, and there wasn’t time for silly little traditions when he had much more important things to do.
“You’re telling me that all other 364 days a year, you roam around the neighborhood in a red devil costume but, you don’t celebrate Halloween.” Foggy had asked incredulously when he asked Matt if he wanted to go out and pretend to be younger than they were for the one night a year it was socially acceptable.
“That is exactly what I’m telling you. Besides Foggy, I’m busy, we’ve got a case to present on Monday and we don’t have a solid argument yet. I will be here, doing my job until my job is done.”
“You’re an enigma man. Sometimes it’s like I don’t even know you.”
“Not funny Foggy, I’ll see you on Monday.”
It was pure luck that Halloween fell on a Friday this week, it meant that Foggy who no longer had the metabolism that he did in college would have two days of recovery time. And he would be able to actually do his job on Monday, which was important given that his name was on the front door.
Matt continued working through the sounds of drunken cheers that floated from down the street. He worked until the moon had risen, and risen and risen a little further until it was a little ways past the middle.
That's when you showed up. People weren’t wrong when they said that there was a stronger connection to the spirit world on Halloween. You’d been watching this man work all night, but you couldn’t understand why exactly he had all the lights off. It hadn’t been recently that you died, but when you did you were pretty sure that most humans couldn’t read in the dark.
When the clock struck three though, the witching hour began and you could feel yourself beginning to take shape. Still in the clothes you were in when you died, your silhouette began to fade into existence.
Had Matt actually been able to really see he would instantly clock the faint glow that surrounded your body. The way that he could sort of see the other side of his office through your body. He would’ve been able to see that you weren’t really alive.
“Do you normally work in the dark?” You cautioned a question. The man hadn’t freaked out which from your understanding was usually the first thing the living did when they were presented with something they didn’t understand. They tried to kill it which in your case had already been done, or they ran away in fear. This man hadn’t done either and you were far too curious to let it go.
Matt, at hearing your words practically jumped three feet in the air. His heart started racing and it was all he could hear. The blood rushed in his ears as he spun around to try and locate the random person who had actually managed to sneak up on him.
He didn’t think it was possible for someone to really sneak up on him, but perhaps he was so entranced in his work that he didn’t hear you come in. Nevertheless, he had an act to upkeep so he mustered up enough breath to send you back a shaky reply.
“Um.. yes, yes I do it saves money on the energy bill and I don’t really need them.” He gestured to the glasses on his face and the cane was leaning against his desk.
‘Oh! Oh. That makes much more sense. I thought you were just really weird.”
“Well that hasn’t actually been ruled out yet.” Matt Shrugged. “So why are you here at…” he felt the numbers displayed on the braille clock Karen had given him for Christmas the past year “3:05 in the morning on Halloween of all nights.”
“I think I should be asking you that question.” You shot back, not wanting to explain that you had died in this building and were stuck in a perpetual state of haunting until you “finished your unfinished business” or some crap like that.
“I have a big case on Monday and I need to work on my argument, although I’ve been working for hours and haven’t really gotten much closer.”
“You’re a lawyer?” You asked.
“Um, Yeah? Nelson and Murdock, it’s on the door.” Matt pointed toward the front door. And after a brief look of your own, you realized he was right. There it was Nelson and Murdock, attorneys at law. “If you don’t mind me asking, why are you here? If you don’t need a lawyer.”
“Do you believe in ghosts?” You asked the man.
Matt was taken aback by the question, it was an abrupt change in topic but one that he figured was pretty on brand given the holiday.
“No. No, I believe in heaven and hell and that everyone goes to one or the other.” He succinctly summarized.
“Well, what about the people who don’t go anywhere? What about the spirits stuck in between?”
“I’m not sure there are any.”
“There are.” Your conviction was surprising to Matt. What was more surprising to him though, was that you didn't have a heartbeat. He didn’t really catch onto it first, with his own heartbeat strong in his ears at first he wouldn’t have been able to hear yours if he tried. But now that he had tried and failed he was struggling with coming up with an explanation.
You were seeing in real time the struggle Matt was having within himself.
“Why don’t you have a heartbeat?”
“What?”
“I can hear everyone’s heartbeat, I’ve been able to hear every heartbeat of everyone I’ve met for a very long time but I can’t hear yours. Why?”
“Dead people don’t usually have heartbeats.”
“You can’t be dead you’re talking.” Matt shot back, beginning to sound slightly out of breath.
“Well, that’s just not true. Because I am dead, and I am talking and you can hear me so…”
“I’m going crazy. Or I fell asleep at my desk. Or…” You heard Matt begin to mumble to himself.
“What is your favorite color?”
‘Can’t see color.”
“Really? That must be terribly dull.”
“It can be”
“Well then what is your favorite animal?” You questioned.
“Why?” He asked, still slightly out of breath.
“Humor me.”
“Umm, a dog.”
Matt’s breath slowly evened out. He wasn’t actively panicking which was good, the last thing you wanted was for him to fall and hit his head and for people to think he was crazy when he woke up speaking about ghosts.
“I didn’t mean to freak you out. But whether you like it or not, I am stuck here for the next,” You looked around the room for a clock, finding one hanging on the wall of a closed-off room surrounded by glass “Thirty-five minutes.”
“What do you mean stuck here?”
“I can’t leave this building, and I get a little more faded the further I walk from this room at all.”
“Why?”
“I’m not sure you want to know.”
“I’m sure I’ll be fine.”
“I was killed in this room, didn’t see who did it, didn’t know it happened until it was already over. I can’t leave because my spirit is tied here. Believe me, I would if I could. Who wants to spend the rest of eternity tied to an old office building?” You let out a self-deprecating laugh.
‘I’m sorry” Matt had whispered.
“Don’t be. It was a long time ago, I’ve come to terms with it all.”
“Is there anything I can do? Or?”
“I’m not sure, Supposedly if I finish my unfinished business I’ll be able to move on but I’m not sure what that would be. Or how I would be able to finish it when I only become really formed for an hour every year.”
You two existed in silence for several moments. You, contemplating what it was that got you stuck here in the first place, and Matt thinking he was crazy for offering his help to an actual ghost.
“I could look into your story if you want.” He cut the silence.
“Really? You’d do that?”
“Yeah, why not? I’d just need your name.”
‘Y/N, Y/N L/N.” you smiled.
You two spent the next twenty minutes talking about the last day that you could remember, anything that might help Matt in his search for more information about you. And when you could feel yourself beginning to fade as the hour expired you were feeling a lot lighter than you had any Hallow’s Eve before.
“Thank you, Matt.”
#matt murdock#plus size reader#plus size!reader#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x you#x reader#fanfic#fluff#flufftober#drabble#matt murdock x plus size reader#matt murdock fanfic#matthew murdock#daredevil#netflix daredevil#matt murdock fluff#daredevil x reader
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Some musings to do with this celltw pic
As a fandom I feel like we could be doing So Much More with Other Side Elements being canon + all the connected Ordem worldbuilding it introduces by association.
Canonically, Cellbit chose to align himself with the knowledge element. So I hopped on over to the ordem wiki page for Knowledge to look for things to put in the paperwork on the table. Then I realized there's a memory alteration ritual (accidentally pulled the wrong ritual circle image for the art though oTL ...let's just pretend Cellbit identified the right one at some point).
The [Change Memory Ritual] can erase all or only some specific memories of the victim. In both cases, if the victim comes into contact with people, places and certain objects that were part of this past erased, it will begin to gradually recall some elements and have quick flashes of some moments, being able to recover its memory completely after a while.
Now listen. If there's one thing I think of as core to q!Cellbit's character, it's that as far as he's concerned the ends always justifies the means. This includes doing things he knows people he loves will hate him for because he thinks it will be better for them in the long run.
In the regret arc letters, he told Tazercraft he loved them, that Cell was dead & he didn't want them to think he was reverting to that type of monster. While there were a few moments where he brought up clearly unresolved feelings of anger and betrayal/abandonment regarding how things went with Fuga, I do think at that point he cared for the Favela crew as a found-family, and was making decisions he felt were in their best interest (usually without consulting them, or like...running those ideas by anyone else ever...)
If he discovered a way to erase specific memories, I could fully see him using that to 'make things better' for Pac. I doubt he'd try to erase all the Fuga memories (especially as he'd have to also erase Mike and Felps) but I also don't think he'd feel like he had to go that far anyways.
Earlier on in the Quesadilla timeline, Pac seemed to think of Cell as basically dormant and was relatively comfortable with having a fairly close and positive relationship with Cellbit. He only grew paranoid about Cell re-emerging when he saw signs of Cellbit snapping, and he first responded by actively trying to keep Cellbit in a headspace that wouldn't lead to that. There have been multiple instances of Pac extending a bit of grace, an unspoken offer not to forgive or forget but to move forward. He wants Cellbit to be a good man, not a monster.
So I think Cellbit would use the ritual to smooth over events that put a strain on their current relationship. Things that made Pac scared he was turning back into Cell. And he'd probably justify it as 'helping' Pac, but there's also a selfish element there too, of him desperately trying to keep hold of this new start and family he probably doesn't deserve but somehow got anyways.
It's small things at first-- just wiping away little instances that put Pac on edge around him. Pac is prone to glossing over Cellbit's red flags anyways, so even if other people remember what Pac doesn't, it wouldn't set off immediate alarm bells. Nobody would catch on to the manipulation.
Pac himself would write off most of the weird, vague flashes he gets sometimes. It feels sort of like deja vu but with an extra helping of uneasy dread. He's not very self-confident when it comes to his brain; he's just being unreasonably paranoid because of his memories of Cell-- those half-memories are so foggy because his brain is panicking and conflating the past with the present, right? More importantly, wants to trust Cellbit.
Now, there's a clip of Pac (which I can't find now but it lives in my head rent free) where he implies that, if Cellbit and Roier hadnt been introduced, he and Cellbit would have been together.
There are a few points in the canon timeline where guapoduo could have been derailed. Cellbit may never have even gotten to that point with Roier if he and Pac were already a little bit closer. If he was fucking with Pac's memories in a way that made Pac less cautious of him, I think it's entirely possible their relationship would have had a chance to develop in place of guapoduo's.
Cellbit didn't start erasing memories with the intention of getting Pac to fall for him though. He wanted the olive branch Pac extended. He wanted Pac to not be terrified of him. But it never occured to him that Pac might be capable of falling in love with the man who ate his goddamn leg. So it completely blindsides him when Pac does, in fact, very deliberately step over the line between platonic and romantic in their relationship.
It feels a lot more morally dubious to be manipulating Pac's memories once that happens. But he's in too deep. He knows Pac would hate him if he found out the truth. But isn't it better this way anyways? Pac, somehow, impossibly, wants to love him-- it's not like he's forcing Pac feel anything about him, right? He knows how terrible betrayal feels-- and he doesn't have to make Pac feel that way, doesn't have to hurt him like that! All he has to do is omit the truth. It's not even a lie, really.
He wants Pac to be happy, wants to preserve the warmth Pac looks at him with now, and if holding his tongue is what assures that... well he can swallow down the guilt gnawing at him and bear that mental burden for both of them. Theres so much in their history for him to feel guilty about anyways, what's one more thing?
Unfortunately for Cellbit, he's never used the ritual on people prior to this, and the books he got it from were light on details as to how it works. He has no idea that the locks on Pac's memories start to slowly erode as soon as he encounters a trigger. And since all of the erased memories are of Cellbit, their time together is just speeding up that process.
Eventually, Pac regains a memory he can't just brush off. And he has to come to terms with the fact that something is very, very wrong between them even if he doesn't understand exactly what's happening to him. He'd figure it out eventually, go through Cellbit's notes in secret and piece things together. When he does he's horrified and angry and heartbroken. But he's torn too because it's not like he can just forget the relationship they've built either, even if he now knows the foundation is half rotted.
He still loves Cellbit, despite every fucked up thing Cellbit has ever done to him.
The question is really whether Pac loves himself enough to pull the plug on this unhealthy dynamic.
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I'd like to get in on the free readings you just posted about, if you're still doing them that is. May I have a reading please?
I'm newer to bringing gods into my practice and worship and I feel my adhd is making it terribly foggy and difficult for me to make a solid connection, so I'd like to ask if I'm trying to connect with the wrong gods/goddesses for me.
Thank you for offering your time and energy!~✨️
Yup, I'm still doing them! That post was only posted like an hour ago as I'm typing this, and I didn't get flooded, so no worries. Also just a quick note; my Ko-Fi is at the end of this post, but it's not a weird social pressure to tip. It's for anyone who is financially able and wants to, and so people who want to check it out- whether they're the one receiving the reading or not- can!
"Are they trying to connect with the wrong gods/goddesses?"
STRONG no on this one. LIke 4/5 cards were reversed. (I use upright = yes, reversed = no)
"What should they keep in mind to help make a solid connection to the deities in question?"
Nine of Cups:
Wish Come True, Fulfullment, Pleasures. This card is all about abundance; balance in all areas of your life, satisfaction, all the good things! At first this didn't quite make sense but what I think it's trying to say here is… gratitude. Look at the good things around you. Maybe you're judging yourself too harshly, especially if you're seeing other people talk about their connections with their deities. Rather than looking at where you feel you fall short, look at what you already do have. You have them in your life, whether you feel like you're getting the "fireworks" you should have or not! While I won't go into full interpretation paragraphs for them, I did draw a couple clarification cards while writing this. The cards (Knight of Cups upright and Ace of Pentacles reversed) feel like they imply that you're looking more towards the money side of things, and you should be looking towards the emotional side. That could be talking about financial hardship causing you to panic and forget the emotional wealth you have, or it could be talking about the very common problem in the witchy/pagan community of thinking you need to have a fancy altar and top-notch offerings to connect with a deity, when really all you need is yourself and the deities you want to connect with.
This was only one card (which tbh surprised me, normally my deck spits out a LOT more) but I hope it resonated nonetheless! Here's my Ko-Fi if you want to tip, or for those who might want to check it out. Good luck with your deities, I understand how much of a pain ADHD can be as a witch sometimes! I appreciate feedback (even if that's just an ask going "yes it resonated" or "idk what you're talking about funny little card man") but there's never any pressure to do so, especially since some of these readings can get- if accurate- REAL DAMN personal.
#tarot reading#tarotblr#tarot readings#Frog's tarot log#witchcraft#witchblr#pagan#deity work#witch blog#paganism
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Inside your mind (Chapter I)
next chapter
pairing: Wednesday Addams x male!hybrid!oc (Reed Turner)
summary: Wednesday has witnessed some strange behavior from the new kid in Nevermore, and she won't stop until she finds out if he's connected to the recent attacks.
warnings: Wednesday being a little stalker, physical attacks, and injury.
word count: 2,376
Another day had passed at the Nevermore Academy when Wednesday was on her way to return to her shared dorm with Enid after her past midnight walk. Her impenetrable and focused eyes travelled to an odd spot in the corner of the hall. You see, she never lets her attention linger on most students, not even for a split second. She judges that most of them are stupid and frivolous teenagers and a waste of time that she has to share the space at the school, but an unusual scene catches her attention.
Eugene was struggling to help a boy that seemed pretty beaten up. He was way taller than Eugene and had his arm around the shorter boy’s neck, Eugene and the stranger boy seemed to be in a hurry. Wednesday frowned a little whilst watching the boys disappear when turned on the hall, the mysterious boy hissed a bit while walking.
The brunette’s eyes stared at the floor for a second, thinking about who was this guy she never saw in the surroundings, why he was hurt, and why Eugene was helping him. They looked like had trouble obviously and that was the weirdest thing to the girl because Eugene was literally a weak dull person. In a good way.
Eugene was like her little brother, Pugsley.
She looked up again and went to her dorm sure that she’d find out what she just witnessed tomorrow.
Wednesday has been watching Reed for a couple of days. You were presented in her class the day after she saw you and Eugene at the school hall. Weems said Reed’s name, and age and that he was a hybrid, just the basic information needed.
But as soon as the days passed by, rumours started as it was expected. But one of them was true, Reed was expelled from his last school because of his aggressive behaviour, even when was in his human form. The principal Weems did not want to tell, which only intrigued Wednesday more. I mean, it wasn’t long since the first and second attacks on the town and no one had any idea who was doing that, and yet the council admitted a new student, which could be very dangerous when turned into his real form.
It was all odd to Wednesday. But it was Nevermore, she wasn’t a bit surprised at this point.
She decided to follow you without your notice, of course. Reed spent most of his time in his room, a dorm just for himself. It was isolated as well, the last one at the end of the hall. Reed didn’t seem to talk to anyone, just sometimes with Eugene, but that was it. Always alone with a book in his hand and earphones plugged into the phone, Wednesday heard through the students’ scattered conversations that he was the outcast of the outcasts.
You also seemed to really, really enjoy drinking coffee. He was an assiduous customer at the Weathervanes, even though he exchanged some weird glares with Tyler. Especially if he was talking to the raven girl.
She even told Thing to spy on him, but he was like a book very well looked at. Much harder to read. Thing wasn't able to find anything that would be interesting.
She had shared her suspicions with Enid. Wednesday kind of was obliged to because the werewolf girl noticed the slight difference in the schedule of her friend and how she was acting, more secretive than usual. The Wednesday usual, better saying. Sometimes Enid amazed Wednesday, but the raven one never took the friend by dumb. Too talkative, joyful, nosy, and a nuisance, but not dumb.
Wednesday was writing her novel on her desk by the window. The night was breathless with the stunning pale moon and foggy weather. It was very dark outside if wasn’t for a frail yellow moving light moving at a hurried pace. Wednesday stood up and got her binoculars that were hanging on the rack, it was Reed.
The raven got her coat and finally seemed to get attention from Enid shift to her. The girl was glued to her phone talking to her boyfriend and listening to music, she refused to listen to Wednesday’s weird songs that were playing.
— Where are you going? — Enid said watching her. Wednesday was at the door already and didn't turn around to answer:
— Find out what is going on with this new guy.
— Wait, Wedn--
Enid tried to talk, but the raven left. The werewolf growled but put her shoes on and followed Wednesday right after, she couldn’t let the raven one goes alone and follow Reed through the dark forest.
— Wednesday!
The raven scoffed and returned to Enid, letting her face express just a little bit that she was annoyed.
— Can you not yell? We are not supposed to be out of our dorm at this time. I have to go, I might lose track of Reed if I continue this conversation. Goodbye.
— Why are you so obsessed with this boy? — Enid followed her once again. — Does Tyler know that?
— I'm not obsessed, I just told you, Enid. I think he might have something to do with the attacks — and then she knits her eyebrows to look at the girl. — Why are you bringing up Tyler? What does he have to do with this matter?
— Isn't he like… your boyfriend or something? He's always been all over you — she smiled suggestively.
— It's intriguing how you can make such assumptions based on nothing, Enid. It is almost astonishing, really — Wednesday fixed her clothes and got a flashlight. — But to answer your question about my private life, no, we have nothing. He's just an acquaintance. I have to see if my coherent suspensions are correct now. Goodbye.
— I don't understand. It all happened before he came here, right?
— Yes, but he seemed to be very harmed a night before Weems presented him as a student. Without the fact that he has a dorm isolated just for himself and gets to the principal’s office way too much — Enid listened attentively while looking at the slightly shorter girl, she didn't realize that one of the employees of the school was passing by and almost caught the to girls, but Wednesday was faster and took Enid's hand and managed to hide behind the door. — And he's a puzzle to me, I know there's something wrong and I'll find out tonight.
— Ok, Sherlock, I know you're not gonna let it go. Even though I think you're just oddly obsessed with this mysterious boy, I'll go with you — Enid sighed.
— Why?
— I won't let you go out by yourself through that dark forest, Wednesday! People are getting attacked, you just said yourself that the Reed could have something to do with this.
— I can take care of myself just fine, Enid.
— I know — the werewolf gave her a small smile. — But I just want to make sure you're not gonna like… die out there because I'd literally freak out if I had to listen to your horrible music for eternity because I don't know to turn off that damn record player.
Wednesday cracked a little smile with that girl's little speech. She then agreed with the werewolf with a simple nod. Enid raised her eyebrows in pure shock.
— That was the first time I saw your smile! — she jumped excitedly. Wednesday’s stoic face returned immediately, but Enid did not care. — OMG, I can't believe I made you smile. You have to work on showing that you're genuinely happy with this smile, but I'll stick to what I have for now.
Wednesday wanted to roll her eyes, but they were running out of time.
— Control your emotions and write about this fascinating fact you just saw in your journal later, Sinclair — Wednesday started to walk again, with Enid by her left side. — You may join me, but if you mess up, I'll feed you to the monster myself.
— Well, that's lovely.
— Can you sniff him? — Wednesday asked, ignoring the bothering on the werewolf’s voice when they silently left the inside of the building. No trace of the boy. They talked too much.
— Now I see why it was so easy to convince you to let me come along.
Once again Enid was quick to read Wednesday.
It wasn't long until Enid found the trace that Reed could be, and both of them wandered through the silently screaming forest. Only the sound of the animals of the night and their silent breathing was heard. Along with the cracking of dry twigs as they made their way through the forest, that was all that the two girls heard when a sudden, out of nowhere, a force made them fall on the ground and roll over. The sound of footsteps was a crescent sound, but before the two of them could process, they were thrown to the ground.
Wednesday fell a foot away from Enid, who was unconscious with the thud.
— Enid?! — Wednesday was a little bit dizzy and felt a sting on her forehead, with a warm thick liquid that she immediately knew was blood and was starting to slowly run down her head.
She didn't care about it though, she was exclusively concerned about the werewolf girl who wasn't responding.
Not with her balance recovered enough, she tried to stand up and go to Enid and help her friend, but when she was about to, footsteps noises were heard. A tall figure, it was a shadowed silhouette of someone Wednesday who couldn't identify obviously. It was approaching them and the raven girl was ready to accept her fate for her presumptuous self to think she could find a good thing coming here and follow a mysterious boy. Possibly the same boy that'd kill her now.
But the only thing on her mind was Enid, she shouldn't let the girl come with her.
— Are you out of your mind, Addams? What the hell are you doing out here?!
Yes, it was Reed. All bruised up and with clothes basically looking like rags. His wavy black hair was a total mess, not that usually it wasn't, but right now it was a real mess.
— It seems like I came to make your services easier — she tried to prop herself up, and almost fell, so Reed took one step forward to help her, which made Wednesday flinch and step back. Reed got the memo and went to his earlier place. Wednesday managed to stand up by herself. — I know you're the monster, but I just want to ask you to leave Enid alone. She didn't see your face.
Reed stared at Wednesday in disbelief for a second and then scoffed, breaking eye contact for a second. Wednesday kept glancing at him, well she had to try to at least plead for the werewolf’s life. She knew she wouldn't stand a chance against the boy in front of her.
— I'm not the monster, Addams, and I don't intend to hurt you or your friend either.
— And what are you doing here then? And in that state? — Wednesday looked at him from bottom to top.
— I asked you first — he retorted.
Wednesday remained silent. She thought if she continued talking about her certainty of him being the monster, Reed would not think twice and kill her and Enid.
— Let's get out of here, it's not safe for you two — he said and went to Enid, to pick the unconscious girl up, but Wednesday stood in front of her, shielding Enid and stopping the boy who was lowered in front of the body. — I'm not gonna hurt your friend, Addams. I need to get y’all out of here before it comes back, I won't be able to protect you two.
— You're really not the monster? Why should I believe you
Reed sighed, annoyed. He was hurt, his body was sore from the fight with the monster and Wednesday's insistent accusations were starting to get on his nerves.
— You want to pay with your life and see that I'm not the monster or do you want to come with me and leave this forest alive with your friend? — he snapped, trying his best to let his tone low.
— Let's go — Wednesday decided to go with him. It wasn't like she had too many options anyway.
Reed carried her in a bridal style through the entire school until the three of them got to the girl's dorm. They had to be very discreet and thoughtful to not be caught by any school employee, but they managed to do it successfully.
***
Fortunately, Enid was fine. It wasn't anything serious but was enough for Wednesday's worry. She didn't know she cared that much about the girl until she thought she was dead. She only noticed that one tear had run down her cheek when a comforting hand touched her shoulder. She was startled a bit by Reed's strong yet delicate touch on her clothed shoulder. Wednesday had forgotten about him while looking at Enid, sitting beside her in her bed.
After he said “Don’t worry, Addams. I'm sure she'll be okay”, she kicked him out.
Reed didn't even get the chance to ask if Wednesday was fine, because of her wound on the head, and when she looked at him, she saw that he was honestly concerned about her looking at her head. And that irritated her.
In any case, Wednesday was sincerely relieved and swore she would never ever again expose the werewolf girl to that danger again.
2 days passed by after the incident in the forest. Reed should attend 4 classes shared with Wednesday, but he didn't show up. Nor was seen at all at the school.
Maybe he had left because Wednesday discovered his secret, but when Wednesday asked some of the teachers about his absence, they said that the principal informed them he was sick and that's why she was absent from the classes. Wednesday then went to the medical wind, the nurse said that he never stopped by.
She decided to confront him once and for all. Wednesday expected to talk to him, but since he hadn't shown up, she'd go to him.
The string about Wednesday is that she wouldn't settle down while she didn't solve this puzzle.
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For the WIP ask game, I'm definitely interested in Royalty Free (I love puns)
Omg okay so this one is way newer. I have so little information on it but I'll definitely give you the gist.
I love playing around with tropes and especially love having fun with using character roles in different ways. Royalty Free is a fantasy set in a cliche old kingdom where the main character wakes up in his home and realizes he's the comedic relief best friend to an otherwise perfect but troubled main character guy.
He realizes that's why people laugh at him even when he's not making a joke or why his friend looks mysteriously related to nobility or how his friends parents died in an unexplainable way. He also realizes that's why his own family sometimes feels foggy and why weird stuff happens whenever they hang out.
I had wanted it to remain just a short exploration of this idea but I've been thinking on making it full fledged thing so there's that. I have to really improve my comedic writing skills though ⊂(￣▽￣)⊃
Hopefully that was interesting. I have to start posting more about it.
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Another hurt/comfort fanfic cuz I have issues probably
(Also Sorry if the writings bad I've been taking exams and stuff, that and I just got off of work 💪)
_______________________
Scratch shot up, in a cold sweat if that's even possible. He panted for a moment, but then calmed down.
"It's just a dream," he silently sighed. Every part of Scratch was telling him to just go back to sleep, but he couldn't move. Well he could, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to. He started to remember the dream he just had more. Nothing abnormal or overly extreme. Just him getting beat. Same thing that happens to him every day. He didn't like being hurt but it was nothing bizarre. So why couldn't he just.. Fall back asleep?
".. God Scratch you're being stupid," he cursed himself, looking down at his pillow. He still couldn't move. Suddenly, something in him flicked like a switch. He waited for a split second, then got up.
He padded his way around in the lab, wishing for once he didn't have big, sharp talons. They made so much noise when they'd tap on the floor. He walked slowly and quietly towards his brother's room, silently barging in. He poked his head out, seeing he was still sound asleep. "Grounder..?" Scratch whispered. He didn't wake up. Scratch felt a pit grow in him, regretting even leaving his bed. He quietly closed the door and walked towards his bed. "Grounder...?" He asked again.
"Hmphh... What?" Grounder sighed, yawning. "I.. Well it's- I just heh thought maybe you'd like to hang out?" Scratch stammered. Grounder turned to look at his alarm clock. ".. It's 4 in the morning go to bed," he groaned, curling back up. "You sure you don't wanna.. I don't know like- like maybe watch a movie or-" "Scratch I'm trying to fix my sleep schedule, please," Grounder grumbled sleepily. "R- right ok sorry," Scratch whispered, but he noticed his voice sounded.. Wobbly? Eh whatever, it was worth a shot. He walked towards the door, about to grab the knob when suddenly..
"Scratch," Grounder quietly called out. "I'm leaving," he replied, too exhausted to deal. "Scratch why are you crying?" Grounder asked, forcing his drowsy body to sit up. "I'm not crying," Scratch huffed, but he noticed he did feel his eyes get watery, his cheeks felt wet and his voice was weird. But it wasn't a nightmare at all. Why the hell would he cry.
"Scratch is that why you came in, if so you can just lay here," Grounder rubbed the other side of the bed. Scratch stayed quiet as he shamefully walked over, laying down beside him. A light sob escaped his throat, hiding his face in embarrassment. What the hell was he doing crying over some stupid dream his own stupid head came up with?
"Scratch it's ok," Grounder sleepily mumbled, hugging his waist. Scratch sniffled softly, curling into Grounder. "I know," he whispered very quietly, rubbing his eyes. "I just had a weird dream.." "Mh... Well you're ok now.." Grounder slurred out, trying to comfort Scratch but on the verge of passing out. Scratch nodded, tears still falling. But he did feel a lot better. Scratch yawned a bit himself, nuzzling against his little brother.
"Night.. Sorry for waking you," he whispered, closing his eyes as he still cried. "Scratch you don't have to worry.. I don't mind.." Grounder murmured, already half asleep. ".. But I'm supposed to be independent a– and strong and mean and-" "I'm not judging Scratch, sometimes it's better to not have to.. I guess deal with things alone," Grounder interrupted. ".. Do you think we're malfunctions?.." Scratch asked hesitantly. ".. Yeah.. But I guess at least we both are," Grounder sighed softly. "Yeah," Scratch agreed.
Slowly Scratch started drifting, his brain becoming foggy. Grounder was also on the verge of falling asleep. Only reason both didn't was admittedly because they never got to spend any downtime together like this. Or at least they didn't have to worry about being yelled at or bossed around. But eventually Scratch cried himself to sleep, curled up beside his brother. Grounder took a bit longer but he eventually fell asleep aswell. The next day would probably be filled with them fighting for the approval of their dad, but for now they could just relax, and not really worry about anything.
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About Karen Page
so. i know this weird little argument should've ended long ago. but i'm in the process of rewatching the defenders saga and i'm actually in the middle of s2 of Daredevil....AND YES I WANNA WRITE A WHOLE TUMBLR POST ABOUT KAREN OK
but first, i wanted to give a little extra info or context or whatever i'm supposed to call it
here are the links to the posts relevant here
0 (me)
1 (me)
2 (me)
3 (nyxxhecate)
4 (nyxxhecate)
5 (nyxxhecate)
also the comments count too. look at whatever nyxxhecate commented on these posts
I unblocked nyxxhecate since i first blocked them, out of honest curiosity. right before i'm writing this actually.
I just wanted to see if they've commented anything else since then or if they made posts on their own about their opinions on Daredevil. Three of the links above are their posts, and idk if tumblr notifies for that but I still don't want to @ them.
I'm not interested in debating with them or starting another argument, and couldn't care less of they see this or not. I am not writing to this person like i was in my other posts, nor am i answering to their comments or whatever points they brought up in their reblogs.
there is ONE thing they said that rang with me though :
"knock your fucking self off that pedestal you're trying to put yourself in. Imagine the level of delusion one must have to think they're intelligent because, *checks notes* they typed in word salad to defend why they like two atrocious TV characters LMAO. You're on Tumblr not the fucking Congress, get a grip IJBOL"
I'm gonna be honest here - I DO enjoy typing word salad. I enjoy writing. I enjoy writing essays. I enjoy trying to use exact words to say what i want to say.
English is my second language, technically, yes, but I have been speaking it for more then ten years, and i'm doing my best to improve because i'm hoping that i'll get to work in english some day. My accent isn't perfect but I'm confident in my spelling and writing and everything.
I've been raised in french, I've done primary, middle and high school in french, and my uni is also french-speaking. I write everything in french all of the time. But since i've taught myself to think in english first sometimes, and none of my irl friends or family like Daredevil or Breaking Bad or anything i like in general - I don't get many chances to argue irl.
So yes, I use Tumblr as an outlet to type as much as I want, even if that means talking to a wall, but at least i get to talk about (IN LENGTH) things i love - and open some kind of discussion (although i'm not blind, i know that rarely anyone replies or anything, but that will hopefully come in time)
---
Now that that's said - let's get to the actual main course :
Karen Page !
As I've said in the beginning i am in the middle of s2 of DD, just finished EP6 : Regrets Only to be precise. I've already got a few things to say.
but first : I'll only talk about her in S1 and S2 and Defenders - because believe it or not, as much as I love Daredevil I AM SORRY but I HAVE NOT YET WATCHED SEASON 3. i miraculously haven't been spoiled about much, all I know is that Matt wakes up in church after his "death", boxes there, there's some kind of detective that seems important and he fights with Fisk again in his black outfit. THAT'S ALL I KNOW AND LET'S KEEP IT THAT WAY.
So.
what do i, Onyx LastName, think of Karen's character.
On my first watch, I didn't like her at all.
Not because she was a "hypocrite"or whatever everyone else is spewing but because I had this huge crush on Matt and was jealous of her.
I'll admit, that's all that my judgement was based on. I thought I didn't like her chemistry with Matt, the way that it made the Nelson-Murdock-Page trio awkward, and how it left Foggy on the sidelines. I like him. I related to him. He was suffering of Sidekick syndrome, with Matt getting powers, getting to be the hero, getting all the ladies, etc etc. I spent my whole life and I'm still actually spending it feeling like I have Sidekick Syndrome myself. If you also feel like you got that you'll know what I mean.
"So Foggy has a special place in your heart. Boohoo. what does that have to do with anything?" You've read this far and you're JUST NOW running out of patience??
Since that initial watch, and after watching countless videos, reading countless fanfics, and honestly my taste just having changed - my perspective of Matt shifted, and so has my opinion on Karen.
I don't think i'm blinded by my attration to Matt anymore, even if he still holds a special place in my heart.
But unfortunately, I still have some issues with Karen's character.
I don't think I've ever really talked about it on here, except maybe with a friend or two in dms, but it's true that I don't really like her. Or how was she was written. This post is not structured or outlined, it's a stream of consciousness...so let's hope i get the answer to that by the end of it.
Now i'm nowhere near agreeing with ANY of what nyxxhecate said, but knowing I wanted to have a definitive opinion of her and make a post about it maybe, I've been looking at her closely during my rewatch - and there are some things I've missed.
So, first, to correct my previous post,
Why is Karen attracted to Matt in the first place?
I made my post about the Foggy and Karen thing before rewatching and refreshing my memory of the ACTUAL EVENTS. I just wrote that in passing after seeing a reaction of that "date" at Mrs. Cardenas.
Here is an updated take :
I think Karen fell for Matt when she first lied to him about keeping the Union Allied file.
You just lived through an intense traumatic experience. You find yourself with a bloody knife in your hand next to the lifeless body of someone you knew and found really nice. Someone tries to hang you in your prison cell at night to make it look like you killed yourself, and no one believes you.
until Nelson and Murdock come in. You're not sure about their intentions at first but they seem kind and most importantly they believe you and are willing to defend you. They're giving you a chance. Not good samaritans but literal guardian angels.
While Foggy is hesitant at first, Matt "I believe you Miss Page"s you right off the bat. (everything's a verb if you squint hard enough)
Matt invites you to his place and assures he'll protect you.
Matt opens up about his blindness and is willing to be vulnerable in front of you.
Matt gives up his silk-sheeted bed to make sure you're comfortable.
All of that when you're vulnerable and Matt is tall and handsome and has this charming smile and ugh. How not to fall for him ? I mean you're wearing his shirt and the beautiful pink lighting in his living room is making everything all romantic. Also if you've noticed the billboard outside his window is for "Xining Airways", company that uses CHERRY BLOSSOM imagery in their advertisement. COME ON.
But then you get to talking about the case again - I mean the reason you're here in the first place - and he asks you an important question.
Did you keep the file?
You lie and say you didn't, feeling your heart beating faster. You're not even sure that sounded convincing at all. And you see the cogs turning in his head, and even if he let you off the hook, you know deep down he didn't really believe it. May seem like me extrapolating here but it IS obvious that he doesn't believe her. But as long as he's not pushing further, that doesn't change much for Karen anyway.
I think that his expression reads that he's seeing right through her.
He believed her when no one else would the first time - but seemingly for no reason.
Matt just KNEW you didn't do it. He saw right through you. You almost feel like he knows what you're thinking.
And again, that kind of connection that you're feeling, in an especially emotionally vulnerable state - plants the seed for love. EASILY.
Any of their awkward flirting before they started dating i am willing to close an eye on.
AFTER THAT? that's just cruel to Foggy and unprofessional and weird in general. Why the HELL are you holding hands in front of whatever DA or cop you just talked to to walk in Frank's hospital room?
Why are you kissing in front of Foggy???
I can understand the thing at Josie's but when you're in the middle of dealing with an extremely important case and Elektra's driver shows up out of nowhere and you're abandoning your partner in a situation that you created and ugh. ew. It's all so weird.
I don't like Karen and Matt dating any more than I did on the first watch but I don't see it through jealousy-tinted glasses and more for what it actually is. misplaced.
Season 2 is the least favorite Daredevil season of anyone I've ever met or talked to and I completely agree that the structure is strange, even if I get what they wanted to do with juxtaposing
Daredevil/Elektra/Hand stuff
and
Matt/Karen/Punisher stuff.
This juxtaposition, while I kinda get the vision, just isn't working. The Hand is the worst plot I have ever seen in my life, and that applies to Defenders too, so that's one reason, but the fact that they tried to mix everything together at once just felt weird pacing wise - and they lost characterization on Matt, Foggy and Elektra's part. All three and their relationships with each other were written weird.
...
Let's get back on track.
Season 2, Karen spends her time investigating and defending Frank.
And that is what she's most criticized for : "protecting and defending frank's actions" and "condemning Matt's lying when she's lying herself."
Frank Castle is a difficult subject.
He is the subject of many debates, wether in the fandom or in the actual show. Is he a hero? Are his murders justifiable? Are Matt and Frank two sides of the same coin? What message is he sending to the audience? How should he be interpreted by his audience? Is Frank redeemable? Is he a glorification or a fetishization of everything that's wrong with the USA? and so on so forth bla bla bla
What matters HERE is what KAREN thinks of him.
Karen is a very determined and ambitious journalist, to say the least. She'd do anything to get to the truth. These qualities that seem very noble at first are also her main flaws. By putting the story first, she throws caution the wind and that very recklessness of hers is what kills Ben Urich, and what compels her to defend Frank so adamantly.
But there's a facet of her personality that I haven't seen being delved into or explained anywhere - her sometimes misplaced but very much there Savior complex, or White Knight syndrome.
She empathized and honestly liked Mrs. Cardenas (a cute old little guatemalan christian lady, who had no one). She wanted to help her. She felt that she was treated unfairly, that all the tenants were treated unfairly, and that was what prompted her to want to take down Fisk. Fisk was using, manipulating and stealing blind people who were already unfortunate. Fisk is lying to the public and hiding his true criminal activities. Savior Complex is activated, now Karen has to find a way to bring him down, even if that means putting her nose where it doesn't belong and provoking the death of Ben Urich.
Now let's look at the situation in S2.
She empathizes with Frank Castle (a man who's entire family got killed and now has no one). He has some kind of moral code that seems noble to her. She feels that he's being treated unfairly, that no one is taking his dead family into account, or what he's already done as a soldier. Frank is unapologetically admitting and sticking by his actions and his code. He doesn't want to hurt anyone that doesn't deserve, in his eyes, to die. Reyes is not upholding her side of the wit-pro deal (She used Grotto as bait, someone Karen already empathized with). Reyes was purposefully trying to get Frank the death penalty for her own gain (she had her eye on the mayor's office) and is hiding a shady past. Savior Complex is activated, now Karen has to find a way to prove that Frank's not all bad and to expose Reyes, even if that means putting her nose where it doesn't belong and overstepping boundaries when she's not a lawyer, and frankly doesn't deserve to get Ben's desk or his job.
When you finally pin down her behavioral pattern and why she acts how she acts, it's easier to understand.
So yes, I understand Karen. (In my opinion at least.)
What makes her who she is is that savior complex of hers, that MORAL code of her own. How she sees herself and what she thinks is her PURPOSE is how she justifies her mistakes, or the risks she takes, to herself. As means to an end.
She doesn't seem to doubt herself or question herself enough to see that her behavior, even if her goal is noble, is not always right.
Her believing that she acts as a savior to others is precisely what makes her a little self-centered.
And, because Matt has this problem too sometimes, she is an interesting character to compare to him.
But now, see, as i've spend a lot of time writing this, my own cogs are turning. I think I've identified what my problem is with Karen.
It's how she's framed. by the writers. by the show.
We see Matt's guilt but don't see hers.
We see his internal turmoil but not hers.
We see him doubt himself all the time and seek for answers in his faith or in people but not her.
If we got to see Karen doubt herself more, show more of her guilt over her killing Wesley, her causing the death of Urich, that would make for a much more likeable and relateable character.
When she argues with Matt or something, what she says makes it seems "hypocritical" of her not to hold herself to the same moral standards than she does others.
But I don't think seeing the flaws in others means you don't see your own. Again, if we had seen Karen questioning and doubting herself, and feeling guilty for what she's done (and not just crying or having ONE nightmare about it. Her trauma should have been more explored in general. from the beginning.) then we'd see that she is self-aware and recognizes her own mistakes and her continuing to feed into her savior complex is her way of finding closure. or trying to save herself from being completely consumed by her own guilt.
So yes. I don't like Karen, not because I don't like her, but be..cause...I wish... we'd seen more of her? or at least framed her differently?
I didn't think I'd reach that conclusion. I thought I'd actually find a real reason not to like HER.
But that's maïeutique for you i guess. or to put it differently, rubber-ducking, right? Isn't that programming lingo?
Also maybe i'm not completely over how Matt and Karen third-wheeled Foggy. or how Matt doesn't really fit with any of his on-screen love interests and how I wish they hadn't dated. but that's a story for another day.
Thank you for reading this far, if you're still here! Tell me your thoughts and opinions on Karen or my own way of explaining it :)
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15 questions, 15 people:
I was tagged by the lovely @lienwyn 💕 hi dear. thank you for the opportunity to overshare 😈🔥 (also, you own a loom?? amazing flex. I’m honestly jealous ahah. and the dog-longing word?? 🥺 heartwarming 😔💕 I feel you on the pain in the back tho, that must have been quite intense for you to have such a reaction. big hugs 💜)
here we go!
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1. are you named after anyone?
unfortunately yes, but it was a mistake. my parents thought the name was elegant.. little did they know a historical figure had it too ahah
2. when was the last time you cried?
so. weird thing. I cry when I see animals. or when I look at people and go “........ earthlings just like me <3”. or when I think too much about how much I love my people. but spontaneous, SAD crying......? not sure. Ik I’ve been down recently, yeah. but if I start crying it’s the end for me. I end up with a stuffy nose all night, if I do. (my hand recently had me seeing stars tho, ngl)
3. do you have kids?
I’m glad I don’t.
4. do you use sarcasm a lot?
I try not to IRL bc you never know how smart people can be. in the sense that I used to use it when I was younger and people smarter than me called me out for it enough times to make me lose any interest in it. I’m also not really good at knowing when someone is being sarcastic with me, period. so.. yeah. not really. no.
5. what’s the first thing you notice about people?
I’m oblivious. I’m so oblivious I don’t even notice large scars on their faces or the color of their eyes sometimes?? from afar I’m quite proficient at reading people’s mood tho?? like, if they are belligerent or not?? is that a thing?? also I can hear them before I can see them almost all the time. I’m a bat, I can hear everything.
6. what’s your eye color?
green? possibly? I have a colorblind mother who tells me they’re blue tho. but she might be convinced of that only because she sees her own eyes as gray when they are green. so I’m not sure about that. my dad tells me we have the same eye color..........but that’s not true. like. his are blue-blue. mine are not like that at all.
fun fact, I love dark eyes. keep talking, gorgeous, I’m not gonna argue with someone with beautiful big brown eyes.
7. scary movies or happy endings?
I’m a scaredy-cat :( I wish I could watch scary movies tho. that seems so much fun! so imma stick to happy endings for now, yes.
8. any special talents?
I craft? a lot? oh but I want to learn woodcarving *-* that would be so much fun. and I guess I’m semi-proficient in the Dad-Art of “collecting weirdly-shaped objects that will eventually come in handy to slot somewhere when they are needed”. yeah :D
9. where are you born?
in the bog. the foggy countryside. the cul-de-sac. but also. northern italy.
10. what are your hobbies?
felt punching, drawing, writing, nagging people, watching old detective shows, reading, petting cats, telling dogs they are good bois (or good girls!), cleaning cupboards, researching, taking notes, horror vacui, listening to people tell me all about their special interests, naps.
11. do you have any pets?
parents have 2 dorky kitties. I long for a silky anteater or a lobster tho. a fat loaf of a cat to call mine would be nice too one day tho, yes.
12. what sports do you/have you played?
I was pretty good at crab soccer when I was younger. and I liked skiing. ;-; too expensive for me where I lived tho.
13. how tall are you?
166cm (5’5??)
14. favourite subject in school?
Dante :) no but fr, italian literature and english. German was cool too, but now I can’t remember any of it :(
15. dream job?
I’m considering either sheparding or...... are there non-religious monasteries out there? that aren’t sects or cults? tax-free, honest labor? no? just me? ok. no but fr, restoring old furniture or working in a library. but I don’t have the qualifications for either of those unfortunately.
it’s time to open that lobster sanctuary of my dreams then 😤 that will cure me.
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here we go! thank you for the lovely game! Imma tag......... idt I have 15 peeps to tag. but I’ll tag some, in case they want to join (or simply to snoop around my business, always nice to be seen :) no pressure to play): @goaheadandflysomeplane , @fismoll7secinv , @shhhsoftnwet , @kinslayersadvocate , @sssrha , @thepointlessmasterpiece !
#tag game#lienwyn#lovely mutuals#so pretty soon I will go on a mini hiatus on tumblr#but messages are open#me is busy IRL#my financial situation requires my attention but#but mutuals if you need me you know where to catch me :D#sneaky niki
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what age range do you think Remus would regress to, and would he and little!Sirius get along well? i keep imagining them regressing together with Remus being his little baby brother, James and/or Lily as their caregivers; working through their trauma and fear of abandonment together 🥲
I’m not sure if you like writing about Remus as a regressor and it’s completely valid if not, I’m just screaming into the void, imagining him having a second shot at being cared for and reclaiming the childhood innocence he had up to 3 years old XHAJDHAHHD
Hmm I think he would be like 2-5 maybe? Since it’s the time of his life he associates with trauma most, he got bit at the age of 4 but I think the memories are all blurred and he just has a bad connection to his toddler years.
He and little sirius would be so cute together. I think little Sirius has a lot more energy than little Remus, he is loud and mischievous. while Remus is like “im just gonna sit and play with this train doing tiny chu chu noises”, sirius is more like “im gonna make this train jump between these couches while doing really loud noises to really make sure everyone knows that the train crashed”. Sirius would take care of Remus since he is more soft spoken and is just that quiet kid that rarely complains but is also sensitive. I feel like Remus would cry if his toy breaks and little Sirius would comfort him and try to fix it.
Sirius: oh noo moo’y it broke?
Remus: *crying*
Sirius: it’s okay!! Pads will fix it! *wipes tears from Remus’ cheek*
Remus: pweas
Sirius: here! It’s done! You can stop crying now *pecks Remus’ cheek*
Remus: thanko pa’fo
Lily and James as their cgs would have their hands full for suuuure, especially because Sirius is always convincing Remus to do things against the rules and make him stand as watch. They would sometimes fight over a certain toy and then find themselves in a tug of war about it so James would have to step in and make them friends again. When Sirius inevitably gets seated in the corner of the room because he did something against the rules, Remus would try to cheer him up by making stupid faces and stroking his hair.
Sometimes when Remus is much smaller (and sometimes non-verbal) than Sirius, he is watched over by the latter a lot more than usual. Sirius would even ask him if he wants his baba and then when Remus nods he would either try making it himself, and make a whole mess in the end, or he would ask James or Lily to make it for Remus. Sirius would try to keep Remus company and hold his hand everywhere so he doesn’t get lost, or scared.
Sirius: lilsiie baba!
Lily: already? You already had one just now…
Sirius: pweassse petty please!!!
Lily: no sweetheart you can’t have so much milk at once
Sirius: it’s for moonyy! Baba moony
During bedtime Sirius refuses to go to bed while Remus only whines because he had already fallen asleep on the sofa. Once Sirius hears how Lily is praising Remus for being good, he hurries to bed as well. Brushing their teeth would however be a challenging task for Remus, it made his mouth feel weird and he didn’t like the way the toothbrush feels on his gums. So he would always whine and if young enough, he would cry. But eventually he would finally be dressed in his comfy pjs while Sirius walks back and forth half naked asking for his paci, or his sippy or his foggie.
In conclusion remus is the sleepy kiddo who would love to jsut go to a zoo and say hi to all the animals, watch a movie, do a puzzle and cuddle all day. While Sirius is the run around in an amusement park all day type of little, play until you drop basically, make two figurines fight, wear someone else’s shoes for funsies and make a whole mess! They would get along more than you think, despite their differences.
I acrually adore little remus Omg!! He totally deserves a second shot 🥺 please comment if you have any other ideas on how Remus would be as a little <333
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Life in Hanoi
Hanoi is different from any other city I have ever been to, and it is even distinct compared to other places I have been in Vietnam. I could post many photos and write many paragraphs but one truly cannot understand what it is like to be here without experiencing it firsthand. You have to experience the feeling of a motorbike grazing within an inch of you as you walk along the side of the road because the sidewalk has too many restaurant setups, vendors, parking, and other obstacles to navigate. To hear the sound of aunties singing karaoke in the middle of a park at night (karaoke is very popular, especially among older women who will gather in groups to sing their hearts out). To have a random dog come up and beg for your banh mi as you sit and eat on a plastic stool in an alley. To inhale smoke from a random bush that is on fire while on the way to class (true story, there are many controlled fires for cooking and trash burning but this particular unattended bush fire on my morning commute stood out). To drink Vietnamese coffee in a cafe decked out with communist decor (there’s actually a cafe chain here, Cộng Cà Phê, that’s famous for being communist-themed and it is not uncommon to see communist decor and flags in general, which can seem a little weird for Americans). To look across the street and see a goat grazing in the middle of the city. I could go on for ages listing random experiences I have had however, as I mentioned, you really have to come here and experience things for yourself to get the full picture.
Some things aren’t that different. I have found that the human tendency to forget how to drive when it rains is universal; it happens in every city in the world. Another universal human trait is sharing love and bonding through food. I have to gotten to know some of my Vietnamese classmates recently by joining them for meals where they ensure that I am well-fed. I previously raved about some bún chả I had in a restaurant, but the best bún chả I have had so far was from a stall tucked away in an alley with seating underneath a tarp that some of my classmates took me to. Befriending locals is 100% the way to the best food in Hanoi.
While I love Vietnamese food, sometimes I do miss home and seek out western food. There are a decent amount of western food options around the city. Pizza is actually fairly popular in Vietnam. Children like to come up to me to practice English and many have told me that pizza is their favorite food. This may be due to pizza and other western food being special for them. My friend who lives here said that McDonald’s is for special occasions, as it is more expensive than local restaurants. Eating locally is definitely more economical; a banh mi for breakfast usually costs around $1USD while an “American” breakfast I had the other day was about $6USD.
Another random thing that reminded me of home was Valentine’s Day, which was celebrated the same as in the US. Last week stores sold roses, chocolates, heart balloons, and gifts, and couples went out on dates. I do not have a Valentine so the only thing that I had was a restaurant serving me a cucumber heart on that day.
While I love Hanoi, there are some downsides that I cannot neglect to mention. The streets are very dirty and waste management is lacking so there is trash everywhere, leading to many areas smelling pretty bad. This coupled with generally poor air quality means, while masks are no longer required for COVID, it is sometimes nice to wear a mask outside. The skies are gray and foggy most of the time, especially since it has been winter. Since I am used to sunny South Carolina, it is sometimes sad to go an entire week without seeing the sun. Public transportation is lacking and infrastructure is very motorbike-centric. Owning a motorbike is necessary for anyone living here long-term, but since I am here temporarily I get by on foot or using Grab (Uber for Southeast Asia). Also, being a foreigner is a little hard. While I think the people on my street are getting used to me being around, I generally get stared at a lot. Touristy areas like the Old Quarter are the only places that are accustom to foreigners, but because of that there are many people around aggressively selling. I much prefer a quiet walk with stares over getting harassed. Although most places have fixed prices listed, there are still many places that will try to up-charge or scam foreigners. This is mostly an issue in the touristy areas as well, I have found the businesses around FTU and where I live to be honest.
Overall I have had a great experience so far and I have learned to appreciate things like seeing the sun when it does make an appearance.
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Holy Ground Ch. 11
pairings: Matt Murdock x French!Avenger!Reader
warnings: winter soldier adjacent treatment in relation to HYDRA, angst, not good thoughts (please remember that you are not alone! if you ever feel that way, please reach out to someone!), new york heat, and matthew michael murdock
word count: ~2k (i know it’s shorter, but i feel like i’ll be able to write this story better this way)
chapter: 11/?
read chapter ten here!
holy ground masterlist found here!
A/N: WE’RE BACK BABEYYYYYYYYYY! no but seriously i know it’s been like five months, let’s just ignore that. i’ve reread the series to get a better standing on it, and i’m excited to continue it!! please don’t repost my work.
want to be added to the taglist? let me know!
and seriously, thank you to everyone who has stuck around and read the series. you guys make writing worth it <3
~L
translations will be parenthesized next to the phrase or word.
Sometimes, when people are terminally ill, they get a burst of life, of health, before they move on.
They called it the surge.
The term crossed her mind as she took consciousness over the assassin for the second time in what she presumed to be the same week. This was the most she had felt like herself since she was taken from Matt’s steps, forced back into a life she wanted no part of. She was now back in the oh-so-lovely jail cell-adjacent room that she had grown accustomed to, restrained, tired, hungry, and vengeful.
Ever since she had made the agreement to stop fighting her assassin side, things were given more clarity. The metaphorical oil painting, though still smudged, had outlines of what it used to be. She knew the assassin couldn’t be trusted, but she found a weird sense of solace knowing that they were both stuck in this situation. Things were turning in her favour, and that’s what truly scared her. Because when surges happened in the medical field, they gave way to death, and though she didn’t suspect she would die, she had no way to know for sure. What if this was the last slice of consciousness that she would ever get? What if she never got to see Karen, Foggy, or Matt again?
Matt.
Anger fueled through her. He had kicked her out that night. He had buttered her up with compliments, allowed her walls to fall, and then made her leave. It didn’t matter that she didn’t look back, he wanted her out. A pain stung her as she realized that she never found out about the court’s decision that night too. Was she free? Well, she wasn’t at the moment. With her mind reminiscing, she didn’t catch the tear that slid down her cheek, instead reaching for a hope that wasn’t there--a yearning for what could’ve been.
But instead, there was only what was, and that was that no one was coming for her.
Not Natasha, not le Diable (the devil), and especially not Steve. She was stuck here, in a never-ceasing loop, until she broke free of the reins herself, or died. She hoped for the former, but welcomed both.
She felt like a lost cause, stuck between a rock and a hard place. She thought of her younger self. If little-kid her saw her now, what would she say? She would tell her to stop moping and get a grip. That she doesn’t need to depend on anyone but herself to save her. Assassin or not, they were no longer separate people.
She took the wrath that Ivan held for her failed mission with ease. It was as bad as she expected it to be, the pain from the machine that bound her fading to a regularity. After what seemed like hours, the pain ceased, and he finally spoke, walking up to her.
“I have another mission for you, убийца (assassin/killer), a local one. I’ll be keeping an eye on you this time so remember, no more stunts.” He cleared his throat.
“Her name is Karen Page.”
~~
The heatwave that struck New York was worse than usual, meaning it was even worse in the office. The crew had as many fans going as they could have without short-circuiting the electric, which made Foggy seriously regret not fixing the air conditioning system sooner. He felt like he was dying in his outfit-who on earth decided that lawyers have to wear suits every day of their damn life-using probably not important papers to fan the stale air his way. His sleeves were rolled up, jacket thrown somewhere in this sauna of an office. His focus had shifted from being an attorney to the noise coming from the main room though, so in an effort to do as little of his work as he could, he stood up to go check it out.
“Hey Karen, is everything okay out there?”
The blonde snapped her head up to meet his, relief washing over her as she took in her confidant. Her desk was organized chaos, papers strewn every which way, plants, and stationery supplies perched at the front, with a cup of coffee behind them. Hot coffee. Leaning against the door frame, he continued, gesturing to the cup. “How on earth you can consume that stuff in this heat is beyond me, do you have a superpower for withstanding heat that I should know about?”
A chuckle escaped her lips as she rolled her eyes, reaching for the said cup. “Maybe I do Foggy. I mean, I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you.”
A smile blossomed on his face at the continued banter. It was times like these, times when his friends and him could trade back and forth jokes, that momentarily distracted them all from the impending pressure of finding her. They had been searching for two weeks and were all being driven up the wall. Matt had become more irritable and closed off than ever, Karen was barely speaking, and Foggy, well Foggy was losing hope. They were all tired from restless nights of scouring and searching for her, from Matt going out as the Devil to Karen researching for her article. The article. She published it two days ago, which had sent all three of them even more on edge. The death toll of HYDRA journalists had skyrocketed from five to thirteen within that time frame, and with Karen’s writing, they were sure she would make an appearance.
It wasn’t the if that they feared, it was the when.
Things just weren’t the same without her. It was like the normalcy that existed before she had shown up was something they could never reach again. The laughter that always flowed through the space when she was here was lost within the walls, the slight buzzing in the air by her electricity now only mimicked by the broken AC.
She had warned them what she could do if HYDRA managed to take her back, and even with Matt’s abilities, Foggy was still concerned. He’d witnessed her speed in use before, and that was when she was on their side. He couldn’t even begin to imagine what would happen if they weren’t able to snap her out of it.
"It’s about her. I haven’t seen any sign of her yet Foggy, but I’m staying safe. Plus, I figure that she’s not going to make an appearance while the sun is out, so that being said any updates on cases?”
Ever since the news became public of the speedster’s ruling, the firm had had an astounding surge of client calls. People who offered to pay them real money too. They had already had three walk-ins today, and it was only noon. And while Foggy loved the money, and did he love the money, a little part of his heart tinged at just how fast the practice took off, like a parent watching their child grow up.
“Yeah, Matt and I can go over all of them with you at the end of the day once we make a spreadsheet. We have to make a spreadsheet! Can you believe it, Karen? People just can’t resist the charming forces of Nelson, Murdock, and Page.”
The grin that had formed on his face was quickly wiped away though. The source of the ruckus coming from Matt’s office, objects hitting the floor with a starling sound. They both walked to Matt’s closed door--while they all kept the doors open usually, Matt had shut his over the past two weeks, another sign of his stress.
The two raced inside, worry all over their faces. Foggy could guarantee that they were thinking the same thing too--that she had broken in and gone directly for Matt. That was another feat they were facing--yes, they knew she was being sent after journalists, but if a part of her was still there and she recognized Matt, she might change targets. They knew she probably blamed him, hell he blamed himself, but this was not all on him. It was just the wrong place at the wrong time.
The worry they had quickly faded to pity and concern as Matt sat there, hand rubbing his neck.
His rasp filled the room.
“Sorry guys, I must have fallen asleep, and knocked over some of my stuff along the way.”
“We thought-”
“We didn’t know if-”
“I know, I’m safe though, no worries. I would’ve made it quite noticeable if she were here.”
“Unless you didn’t, because of the speed at which she could kill you, and then the only thing we hear is your body hitting the ground.”
“Foggy!” Karen shot him a glare.
“What?” Foggy shrugged his shoulders. “It’s the truth, we have no idea.”
Matt stood up now, stretching his arms and legs out. “No, no, he’s right, I should be more attuned to what’s going on. I-” Matt took a deep breath and grabbed for his chair, steadying himself. “-I haven’t been taking care of myself lately and it’s wearing on me.”
“At least he’s self-aware.” Foggy chided, arms crossing over one another. “We all can’t keep living like this, and frankly I’m sick of it. We need a plan for if she shows up, so everyone can stop stepping on ice, yeah?”
Murmured agreements echoed around the room.
“Good. Karen, let’s start with you.”
~~
By the time the sun had begun to sink into the horizon, more cups of iced coffee (per Foggy’s request) had been consumed between the three of them than what was likely humanly possible. Matt was still physically exhausted from his night out before, but they had all agreed on a buddy system to prevent separation, which could lead to isolation, which could domino into her unsuspected arrival. Karen was going to stay with Matt for the night, and Foggy with Marci, making sure no one had to brave the elements alone.
“Karen? Are you almost ready?” The evening was rounding down to an end, and Matt was way more excited than he’d like to admit at the thought of leaving that office for the day. He wouldn’t admit it out loud either, but he was happy for the company. Ever since HYDRA took her, he had barely been able to step foot into his flat without a wave of guilt hitting him. He could hear the ghost of her everywhere, from her laughter by his vinyls to her footsteps past his bed. A select few times he thought she was there, in his flat, waiting for him, though the closest her presence had truly been was solely in his mind.
He had gone over their entire argument too, many, many times. She was right about it, of course, but he was too proud to admit that then. He boxed himself up when things became too normal, and it had cost him and the others greatly. He couldn’t stop wondering what would have happened if he didn’t tell her to leave, called her name one final time before she walked out, or ran after her to apologize. She had offered to be there for him, and he told her some of the harshest words he could muster in return. When he saw her again, he was going to do all in his power to make it right. To get her back, not just for himself but for Foggy, Karen, and herself too. She didn’t deserve this, she never asked for it, and he was going to help her make HYDRA pay afterward, whether it be as Matt Murdock, or the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen.
“Karen?” He called again, stepping from his office into the main room. He could hear her heartbeat so he knew things were okay, but still he worried, the crease in his eyebrows a physical sign of that.
“What? Yeah, sorry, I’m almost good to go, I just need to get a few more things together. Have you eaten, Matt?” She hummed as she gathered her things, slinging her purse onto her shoulder. Matt didn’t reply, instead opting to walk towards the doorway.
“And I’m taking that as a no. We’ll stop along the way for food, see how late that Thai place you like is open?”
“Yeah, yeah okay that sounds good with me. I’ll-” but he was never able to finish his sentence.
Because the next thing he knew, there was a third heartbeat. A third heartbeat that ran faster than a heartbeat should, followed by the familiarity of faint electricity in the air that he could practically smell.
And then he heard the voice.
Her voice, smooth as honey.
“I see you still haven’t gotten locks for the door mes amies.” (my friends)
taglist
if the tags are not working, please let me know! i was having some problems with them earlier
@eliwinchester-barnes @enjoymyloves @mshannah @pariahsparadise @saramaple @2guysonascooter @insomnia-bookworm @redsakura101 @thescarletwtch @dpaccione @bxrbiewrites @dearsthings
#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock#daredevil#holy ground#marvel#daredevil x reader#fanfic#matt murdock x you#foggy nelson#karen page#im a really good lawyer#matt murdock series
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für die weird questiosn: 3, 4, 6, 7, 13, 15, 21, 36, 39, 40 :)
thank you! c:
3. What is your writing ritual and why is it cursed? - does staring at a blank document until i get distracted by tumblr or my birds count? idk it just happens a lot, i don't have a set ritual ^^
4. What’s a word that makes you go absolutely feral? - I. uhhh. uhm... I genuinely can't think of one rn, sorry ._.
6. What is your darkest fear about writing? - maybe not the darkest but I'm scared of never finishing anything again because almost all of my long-ish stories are unfinished and as I get closer to the end of my young!Cotta AU it gets harder and harder to write
7. What is your deepest joy about writing? - sharing ideas and scenes and vibes that stick with me for weeks or even months with other people and getting to enjoy them experiencing it too! that's why I care so much about comments on my fics, i just love love love talking about characters and plotlines and symbolism with other people!!
13. What is a subject matter that is incredibly difficult for you write about? What is easy? - realistic police proceedings (which I am blessed to be able to ask @daughterofhecata about) and even more so how policemen talk to each other. MAJOR problem atm argh. easy is brooding, overthinking and mentally unstable characters (I wonder why...) ^^"
15. Do you write in the margins of your books? Dog-ear your pages? Read in the bath? Why or why not? Do you judge people who do these things? Can we still be friends? - nope, nope and not really - I sometimes put little notes into my assigned reading in school but don't do that with my normal reading, I don't like dog-earing anything and I don't have a bathtub (when I had one I actually took a book in there with me but my glasses got foggy and I can't really read withouth them ^^); i also don't judge people for doing it cause books usually aren't that "special" (unless you'd like, dog-ear some really rare book or a manuscript but I assume people have more sense than to do that)
21. Could you ever quit writing? Do you ever wish you could? Why or why not? - I don't know. I've thought about quitting several times because the interaction with others is what keeps me going the most and since comments get less and less it's really frustrating at times. I've been at the "what even is the point?!" stage in writing quite a lot, especially since I've started working full time and spend what little free time I have writing so not doing it would mean not spending most of my free time on the PC like I do at work. on the other hand, then I'd never get all these scenes and characters bothering me out of my mind
36. They say to Write What You Know. Setting aside for a moment the fact that this is terrible advice…what do you Know? - I know a lot about really specific little niches in art history (unpainted medieval wood sculptures, Cambodian architecture from 1950-72, ...), the Middle Ages in general and medieval German literature in particular and especially heroic medieval stories - and I love incorporating some of these in my writing! I've actually written quite a few stories that involve art/art history - sadly, silly medieval wannabe-heroes haven't really fit into any story yet but that could be so much fun too ^^
39. What keeps you writing when you feel like giving up? - the characters not shutting the hell up in my head, shiny new ideas that I can latch on to (and to be cheesy on main bc this especially goes for the AU: @daughterofhecata bc of all the support ♥)
40. Please share a poem with me, I need it. - okay, technically this isn't a poem but I'm obsessed with Der Welt Lohn (Verserzählung mit Reimen, das zählt!) and especially the artistic depictions of Frau Welt
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HAII❕️❕️ o(>.0)O
☆ I'm Jaylin/Daniel but call me jayjay or danny ! [He/Him]
☆ I wont specify age cuz I'm not comfortable but I'm almost 8teen ! 🐇
A fag emo beaner who loves moobies and is an absolute whore for himbos and pathetic whiny men..
☆ I like horror/scary stuff, creepypasta/marble hornets, mlp, sanrio, monster high, foggy/rainy weather, emo/scene/gothic culture, and I also love reading and writing ! ^_^ I like a lot of other stuff too but that's too much to write, though I'm pretty much open about anything :3
▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။||||| 0:10 Sew Me Up –Spiritbox
Anywho, I felt like I needed to write sum like this cuz well, even if I don't post anything here, (too shy and not confident enough + social anxiety) I've been having some... weirdos.. follow and interact with me o_O
So! Here are sum things that are a HUGE DNI if you like, and/or are any of these. (^ω^)
If you like dd/lg (seriously dni. You're weird.)
Want to get r-worded, romanticize, or sexualize it ! (get actual help or jump.).
If you like doing rape play.
If you like age play.
Infantilization kink! (Unless you're a little and use it as a coping mechanism, then you're fine.)
Self-harm kink/promoting sh. (Especially you. Stay away from me, weird ass bitch💀)
Idolize eating disorders.
Fake mental illness for no damn reason at all.
If you sexualize teenagers/kids.
If you fantasize about getting kidnapped and being done horrible things to you, such as rape. Or if you wanna do that to someone else and think it's hot.
Necrophiliac ! (Even if you not one but still find it hot.)
If you like incest.
Zoophile ! (Ew)
If you think abuse is hot/attractive and if you want to get abused.
Yanderes. (Some of yall are okay, I fw yall but for the REALLY weird ones, then don't interact please. Especially if you wanna do sum like that irl, like killing and kidnapping or whatever.)
Don't follow me of your blog is only about sex and nudity.
☆ 'kaykay! I think I got 'em all. Now for the usual dni ! ^____^
Racists.
Homophobes/transphobes.
Xenophobes.
Ableist.
Fatphobic.
Dsmp/dream fan.
Fujoshis/obsessive bl fans. (We're not here for your fantasies and fetishes.)
Extremely, and I mean EXTREMELY religious people that judge/demonize other religions.
Basically all the usual ! nwn
And I think that's pretty much it? Anyway, have some more info 'bout me !
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┊ ┊ ★⋆
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˚★
I heart vampires, I'm Mexican💪, I love animals a lot, my favorites being rabbits, rats, snakes, bats, and crows/ravens. I like writing a lot and reading ! I also like plants, favorite being the dragon skull flower<3. I like "weird" things and I love stars a lot. I have adhd and other mental issues, I also can be rude/mean sometimes so if I am ever rude to you, I'm sorry. You probably caught me in a bad mood or you just said something stupid. I like rock and metal bands, including vkei ❕️❕️I also like skz ^_<ᯓ★, I'm pretty much open to new music recommendations of any kind of genre !
I love my mami santita muerte🫶 And I'm also a shifter nwn ! (Ifykyk). And I think that's pretty much it?? Yeah, that's it, I think !
'Kay then byebye o(>.o)O
…ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ♡ ༘*.ﾟ
#introduction i guess?#I just don't want any more weird people following me 💔#I barely know how to work this...#ᘛ⁐ᕐᐷ#gimme music recommendations 🗣#i'm in your walls#emo??#gothic... I gusss..#i love vampires#dannythesceneslutt 🐇!#🦇#I need reality shifter mutuals❕️#i'm just yapping#:3#sorry this is so long omfg💀
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Jornalista, 21 anos.