#abt the disorders
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so so funny I went to read the handbook on narcissism and npd in an effort to learn more about the disorder & it’s complexities from specialists and what I learned instead is that NOBODY CAN AGREE on what it means AT ALL or anything else about it!!!!!
#rant in tags but an interesting one if u like psychology#don’t get me wrong the handbook IS from 2011 so it’s been over a decade but also it’s still considered like the primary text on npd and I#get the feeling the same debates are probably still going on#like I wish u all could understand. basically the only thing anyone seems to agree on is that the dsm IV (and considering the criteria for#diagnosis changed almost not at all between IV and V I imagine this still holds true)#is a BAD tool for diagnosing it. like the categorical model of diagnosis just doesn’t work well for personality disorders#plus the actual criteria listed for npd and many other pds in the dsm just straight up are not well grounded in actual scientific research#abt the disorders#and that’s what they agree on. as for the rest#NOBODY agrees on what inventories or models are effective & accurate NOBODY agrees on what the actual symptoms are beyond self#aggrandizement there’s a huge debate over whether there are subtypes of npd and if so what are they#and of those who DO believe in subtypes the most popular theory is grandiose vs vulnerable but THEN there’s a whole debate about THEM#bc some psychologists consider them two separate manifestations while others say that ppl with npd vacillate between the two states#and nobody can conclusively link self esteem with npd in any meaningful way other than that diagnosed ppl usually have higher surface level#self esteem but the whole concept of whether the narcisstic persona is a defense mechanism or just a delusion nobody can agree on or prove#and if ur wondering where the line is drawn between trait narcissism and npd ? buddy I’ve got bad news for you NOBODY KNOWS#like trait narcissism and npd are categorically two different things but the practical reality of someone with high trait narcissism vs npd#is just like. shrugs#and also high trait narcissism usually means scored high on the npi but hey guess what the npi has been HUGELY criticized and nobody can al#agree on how accurate it is!!#I could go on forever but u get the idea like. if you asked three different specialists in npd how they would define the disorder you would#VERY LIKELY get three completely different answers#and now. if ur sitting there wondering#hey wait a minute#but if the DSM V the official guideline for psychiatric evaluation infamously are not a good framework to diagnose pds or npd#AND if all other sources and experts have conflicting opinions#then WHAT is this disorder and HOW is it consistently diagnosed#AND IM WONDERING THE SAME DAMN THING!!!
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Please, if you can, take a moment to read and share this because I feel like I'm screaming underwater.
NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) stigma is rampant right now, and seems to be getting progressively worse. Everyone is using it as a buzzword in the worst ways possible, spreading misinformation and hatred against a real disorder.
I could go on a long time about how this happened, why it's factually incorrect (and what the disorder actually IS), why it's harmful, and the changes I'd like to see. But to keep this concise, I'll simply link to a few posts under the cut for further reading.
The point of this post is a plea. Please help stop the spread of stigma. Even in mental health communities, even around others with personality disorders, in neurodivergent "safe" spaces, other communities I thought people would be supportive in (e.g. trans support groups, progressive spaces in general), it keeps coming up. So I'm willing to bet that a lot of people on this site need to see this.
Because it's so hard to exist in this world.
My disorder already makes me feel as if I'm worthless and unlovable, like there's something inherently wrong and damaged about me. And it's so much harder to fight that and heal when my daily life consists of:
Laughing and spending time with my friends, doing my utmost best to connect and stay present and focused on them, trying to let my guards down and be real and believe I'm lovable- when suddenly they throw out the word "narcissist" to describe horrible people or someone they hate, or the conversation turns to how evil "people with narcissistic personality disorder" are. (Seriously, you don't know which of your friends might have NPD and feels like shit when you say those things & now knows that you'd hate them if you knew.)
Trying to look up "mental health positivity for people with npd", "mental health positivity cluster bs", only to find a) none of that, and b) more of the same old vile shit that makes me feel terrible about myself.
Having a hard time (which is constant at this point) and trying to look up resources for myself, only to again, find the same stigma. And no resources.
Not having any clue how to help myself, because even the mental health field is spitting so much vitriol at people with DISORDERS (who they're supposed to be helping!) that there's no solid research or therapy programs for people like me.
Losing close friends when they find out, despite us having had a good relationship before, and them KNOWING me and knowing that I'm not like the trending image of pwNPD. Because now they only see me through the lens of stigma and misinformation.
Hearing the same stigma come up literally wherever I go. Clubs. Meetings. Any online space. At the bus stop. At the mall. At a restaurant. At work. Buzzword of the year that everyone loooves loudly throwing around with their friends or over the phone. Feels awesome for me, makes my day so much better/s
I could go on for a long time, but I'm scared no one will read/rb this if it gets too much longer.
So please. Stop using the word "narcissist" as a synonym for "abusive".
Stop bringing up people you hate who you believe to have NPD because of a stigmatizing article full of misinformation whenever someone with actual NPD opens their mouth. (Imagine if people did that with any other disorder! "Hey, I'm autistic." "Oh... my old roommate screamed at me whenever I made noise around him, and didn't understand my needs, which seems like sensory overload and difficulty with social cues. He was definitely autistic. But as long as you're self-aware and always restraining your innate desire to be an abusive asshole, you're okay I guess, maybe." ...See how offensive and ignorant that is?)
Stop preventing healthcare for people with a disorder just because it's trendy to use us as a scapegoat.
If you got this far, thank you for reading, and please share this if you can. Further reading is under the cut.
NPD Criteria, re-written by someone who actually has NPD
Stigma in the DSM
Common perception of the DSM criteria vs how someone may actually experience them (Keep in mind that this is the way I personally experience these symptoms, and that presentation can vary a lot between individuals)
"Idk, the stigma is right though, because I've known a lot of people with NPD who are jerks, so I'm going to continue to support the blockage of treatment for this condition."
(All of these were written by me, because I didn't want to link to other folks' posts without permission, but if you want to add your own links in reblogs or replies please feel free <3)
#actuallynpd#signal boost#actuallyautistic#mental health awareness#narcissistic personality disorder#people also need to realize that mental health professionals aren't immune from bias#(it really shouldn't come as a shock that the mental health field has a longstanding pattern of misunderstanding and mistreating ppl who ar#mentally ill or otherwise ND)#the first therapist i brought up NPD to like. literally pulled out the DSM bc she could barely remember the criteria. then said that there'#no way I have it because I have low self-esteem lmaoooooo#anyway throwback to being at work and chatting with a co-worker. and the conversation turning to mental health. and him saying that#he tries to stay informed and be aware and supportive of mental health conditions & that he doesn't want to be ignorant or spread harmful#misinformation. and then i mentioned that i do a lot of research into mental health stuff and i listed a bunch of things. which included#several personality disorders. one of which was NPD.#and after listening to my whole ass list he zeroed in on the NPD and immediately started talking about how narcissists are abusive and#he knew someone who had NPD and how the person who had it had an addiction and died from the addiction in a horrible way and he#was glad he did#fun times#or when i decided to be vulnerable and talk abt my self-criticism/self-hatred bc i knew my friends also struggled w that and i wanted to#support them by sharing my own coping methods. and they both(separately!) started picking and prodding at my npd through the lens of stigma#bc i'd recently opened up to them abt having it. they recognized self-hatred as a symptom and still jumped on me for it. despite me#trying to share hurt vulnerable parts of myself to help them and connect with them.#again..... fun times
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feels like we "broke the stigma of mental health" just enough for companies to monetize "self care"
#text#u know ? like yeah people know what depression is#but no one wants 2 talk abt the 'ugly' parts of it#let alone more stigmatized disorders
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awetistic things {1054}
people thinking you’re innocent and pure just because you didn’t pick up on one sexual innuendo
#how was i supposed to know u were talking abt real life and not the sims 4 wicked whims mod#HOW#TELL ME HOW#autism#autistic#actually autistic#asd#autism spectrum disorder#on the spectrum#autistic things#autistic problems#autism problems
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ocd is the answer to the age old question no one ever asked, "what if your anxiety had autism"
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Who are you, really?
#Alternate title yeah i played this vr game but it didn’t do anything for fazbear’s reputation i just realized i have a dissociative disorder#Oops !!#fnaf#my art#vanessa sb#vanessa security breach#vanny#vanny fnaf#Vanny the bunny#princess quest fnaf#princess quest#Btw the two standing with ness in the last picture are loche(left) and crown(right) theyre nessa’s alters feel free to ask abt them#System nessa is real tomme
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when ur ladies man comedic relief pretty boy sidekick turns into the most complex layered queer character known to man
#this is why sometimes canon queer rep is worse bc they really are not doing it like this. they just slap a label and some stereotypes#on a character and give them the blandest love interests and say 'done' bc all they care abt is checking that 'rep' box#but dean. dean is so delicious he has layers you can peel back he's a mess he has ever disorder#AND he's in love with an angel. he fucked the king of hell#no one is doing it like him. character of all time
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“delululu” “what a narcissist” “i’m so ocd” “i let my intrusive thoughts win” “im an empath” “are you acoustic” “bpd girls 😍” “im so manic” “my trauma made me spicy and funny”
#i can’t stand when people use terms wrong especially abt serious mental health disorders#if you have those disorders and use these ur fine dw!!#actuallymentallyill#ok to rb
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i don't want to hear about your diet i don't want to hear about your weight loss "journey" i don't want to hear about your clothing size i don't want to hear about your "healthy alternatives" recipes i don't want to hear about your fucking nutrient dense protein pancakes or your green juice super smoothie metabolic booster lemon water cayenne honey tea i don't want to hear about your workout routine i don't wanna hear about your slimming shapewear i don't want to hear about how much you hate your arms or legs or stomach or hips i don't want to hear about how "bad" you've been for eating too much dessert i don't want to hear about the number on your scale i don't want to hear your casual fatphobia dressed up in the language of "wellness" or the excuse of self-hatred!!!!
#sorry i simply. am so beyond pissed off#i'm never going to congratulate you for your stupid fucking diet!#i'm never going to congratulate you for weight loss!#i'm never going to commiserate with you over weight gain!#saying oh sorry but i'm just insecure abt my body isn't a fucking excuse#i'm sorry but i DON'T CARE!#work on ur fatphobia or shut the fuck up and hate your body privately#like i know it's a hard pill to swallow but being afraid to be fat is something you should actively be challenging!#and no matter how wrapped up in the language of wellness it is#anything you share or say publicly about wanting to make your body smaller is only ever going to contribute to fatphobia#no matter how rooted in personal insecurity it is#tw fatphobia#tw ed#sorry babes but dieting IS disordered eating. it is#ranting and raving#txt
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new gemini update was so good as always but I can't stop thinking:
big mama: there's nothing wrong with my sons
splinter: you fucked up two perfectly good kids is what you did. look at blue. he's got an eating disorder
wwhhhattttt? nooo, don't be silly. leo doesn't have an eating disorder.
leo and donnie have eating disorders--
#this is a Joke but also No It's Not#it's just different flavors lmao#but both of them have absolutely fucked relationships with food#my poor babies... :(... who did this to you...?#(it was me i did)#leo spends a lot of time worrying about whAT hes eating and how mUCH hes eating and if hes eating the rIGHT thing#largely due to his mom and also just being a celebrity/child celebrity in general#but also in part due to:#donnie has a lot of food sensitivities which have really never been accommodated for at all and as a result he just#has a very negative association with food and eating. he doesnt LIKE eating and he avoids it a majority of the time.#its stressful and unpleasant and he doesnt like it#which ofc only gave leo another reason to hyperfixate on food and calories and nutritional value etc etc etc#which leads to#ironically#leo (who def has an undiagnosed ed and restricts/denies himself food regularly): worrying abt making sure donnie eats enough#donnie will do the same thing back sometimes but not with the same obsessiveness that leo does#esp because the ideals surrounding eating and dieting set up around them really kind of just#lead them both to believe (at least to an extent) that leo is fine and eats a totally healthy and ok amount of food (esp in comparison to d#(no he doesnt)(and even when he does thats not the point)#tw eating disorders#cw eating disorders#eating disorders#tw disorders eating#cw disordered eating#disordered eating#gemini au asks#asks#anon
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Your obsessions read as hyper fixations. You seem very autistic/pos. Are you autistic?
this is so funny to read omg. uh. i've been told its ~probablyyy ~likely ?? But i don't want to seek a diagnosis so we'll never know
#ask#and i dont mean this in a quirky way or anything. i usde to have a fairly big interest in medical stuff so i know the ~negative traits#and i see a lot of the ~negative traits in myself adjgkajkd#(tho im the opposite of being monotone/expressionless)#i like to just call myself ditzy tho. Ur honour... I'm just an airhead.. a blonde brunette....#i also have an anxiety disorder so its rly anyones game here#currently rn if im left in silence for too long i start talking abt dungeon meshi. like. um so. in dungeon meshi-
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In case it for some fucking ungodly reason needs to be said, you cannot be fucking claiming to respect and support people and claim its torture to b around them. that is so tucking backwards.
if you need to hear it, and have bpd, npd etc, know i fucking adore you. you're doing fucking splendid and shit can be hard and there's a lot of stigma against your diagnosis but know that you're loved and cared for in this space.
#i will fucking dropkick people#do not fucking INTERACT with my content#if u think ppl w personality disorders are 'torture' to b around#like jfc talk abt feeding the stigma
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i stg if i see one more person call montresor a "narcissist" or "sociopath" despite the fact that both of the characters he's manipulating right now are so heavily personality disorder-coded, i will fuckin kill a man
#for the last time!! being an awful person isn't pathological!! and having a disorder doesn't make you an awful person!!#this is like my instant anger button man normally im (kinda) chill but i am 100% ready to throw hands over this topic#i argue abt this with random internet strangers abt this like every other day </3#nevermore#nevermore comic#nevermore webcomic#nevermore webtoon#ghost.text#ableism cw#i am like This close to snapping#i'm swear im going to headcanon duke as having npd out of spite
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kinda funny that a prominent trait of autism is feeling strongly about injustice. yes hello my child is angry about late-stage capitalism, can we get a ‘tism certificate?
#.txt#allistics don’t touch#autism.txt#autism#i was thinking about the stereotype of closeted gay kids being rlly passionate abt gayrights and i kinda just. idk..#like i will argue w my dad for days abt trans rights but. i’m essentially cis#‘essentially’ it’s complicated#idk ! that was where the thought process for this post was#anyway#actually autistic#autistic#’tism#asd#autism spectrum disorder#autism spectrum condition#anti capitalism#500#1k
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you know. i wish more people were open about PDs. i wish more people joked about it and just popped it into a convo all casually. i wish it was accepted, i wish i could just mention it and then keep going without people never looking at me the same way again. i wish PDs were treated like how anxiety is. how, for the most part, i can casually mention it and people would laugh and relate, i wish all my disorders were treated like that
#i know we still have a long way to go with how anxiety is treated#but i notice significantly better responses to talking abt anxiety than my PD(s)#bpd#actually borderline#personality disorder#actually bpd#pd#personality disorders#mental health#mental illness#actually mentally ill#persodivergent
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