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#Sirius black is actually the only thought on my mind at any given point in time ever
ifyoucandaniel · 1 year
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Take a look at my boyfriend, he’s the only one I got…🎵🎶🦋
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Hi!!!!
I was wondering for Trope Tuesday if you could write a brothers best friend with James Potter (If possible could she be best friend with Lily and the girls but don’t worry if not)
Love you and your writing xxx
thanks so so much!! for requesting and for being so sweet 🥲 i hope you like it!!
for my 250 Followers Writing Event!
Tropey Tuesday 🎭 trope: brother's best friend
pairing: James Potter x reader 
tags: angst, fluff, Lupin!reader, fem!reader, sibling fluff
word count: 3k (not me with the first thing I write after saying I might keep things a bit shorter)
“Hey, little Lupin,” Sirius says, grinning, as he plops down beside you on the common room couch. “You know we’re twins, right?” you respond, not even looking up from your book. “Yeah… but you’re shorter.” He seems overly satisfied with his justification, and you can’t help but giggle at his antics. 
“So. What are you reading?” he asks. 
This confuses you; you didn’t think Sirius was much of a reader. You look up at him, your eyebrows furrowed suspiciously, “You care?” “No, not really.” You roll your eyes at him though you’re not actually upset. “So why are you here, then, Black?” 
“I come at the behest of my darling best mate.” “And what does my darling brother want now?” 
“No, not Moony, Prongs.” Your stomach tenses at this. This just went from slightly irksome to anxiety-inducing interesting. 
“Well, ‘behest’ isn’t the right word exactly. He doesn’t know about this. But I know him, and he’s never going to make a move himself, so I see it as my best-mate-duty to give a helping hand.” Your mind is racing. “Make a move”?? Is there really a possibility of your crush liking you back? Is that what Sirius is telling you? That James likes you too??
You’re probably blushing and definitely confused, so you sit there awkwardly, hoping he’ll go on without your having to say anything yet. To your relief, he does. “I have it on insider information that our dear James Potter has himself a crush.” Godric, you never thought this would actually happen. After years of pining, of getting to know him… of thinking he only saw you as Remus’s sister.
“You’re best friends with Lily, right?” Relief turns to terror. Oh no, oh no, oh no, please no. 
“Um… yeah?” “You don’t sound too sure, sweets,” he laughs. “Yeah, I am.” You know, but pretend - especially to yourself - that you don’t, “Why does that matter?” 
“I want to get her and Prongs together of course! He’s been off lately, and he won’t tell me why. He always tells me everything. So, I reckon it has to be about a girl. And I’ve caught him looking over at you lot constantly recently. I saw him and Evans chatting yesterday, and there was definitely something there.” 
You’re on the verge of tears at this point.
“You alright, Y/N? You look like you’re going to be sick.” Sirius sounds genuinely concerned, and you don’t know how to escape with a convincing excuse given there’s no way in hell you’re going to tell him the truth, especially now he’s said what he has. 
“Um, no, not really. Sorry, I, uh, I think something I ate wasn’t quite right,” you stutter lamely, clumsily collecting your things, and running up the stairs to your dorm. After the night’s cruelty, it provides you a bit of sympathy: the room is empty. You curl up on your bed, clutching your pillow, and let the tears fall.
Why did it have to be Lily?? I mean, why did it have to be anyone at all if it couldn’t be you, but your best friend? You know how brilliant she is, how could you not, and you know how brilliant he is, and well, maybe they would be a good fit. If they make each other happy, that should make you happy; you want the best for Lily, truly. 
No amount of trying to convince yourself makes the thought of them together sting any less, though, and you succumb to wallowing in your disappointment and sadness. 
You’re still crying when you here a knock at the door.
“Y/N?? You in there? Open up, please. Sirius said you were ill?” If it were anyone else, you’d pretend not be there. But it’s Remus. You’ve never hidden from each other your whole lives; besides, you need him now even if you can’t tell him why. You wipe your face as best you can as you go to the door and open it. His eyes look frantically worried, and your heart melts a little bit. You might not have the romantic love you want so desperately, but at least you have this. Not many people know what it’s like to be as loved as you are. You try to cling to that feeling as you cling to Remus, crying into his jumper, but at the moment, it’s not enough consolation to assuage your aching heart.
“What’s wrong, Y/N/N? Did something happen? You’re really worrying me,” he says stroking your back. You shake your head. “Hey, can you talk to me? Please?”
You recover yourself a bit and go sit on your bed. Remus follows. 
“It’s nothing,” you say pathetically, wiping your eyes. “Uh huh,” he replies, unconvinced. “Really, Rem. Thanks, but it’s not a big deal. I’ll sort it, really.” 
“Can’t you just tell me what it is?” “I’d rather not.” “That’s new.” He sounds genuinely surprised. “I don’t like it,” he chuckles. “We couldn’t tell each other everything forever, could we?” you smile sadly at him. 
“And why not?” You laugh together, and you feel a tiny bit better.
The thing is, you want to tell him. And you would if it weren’t his bloody best friend. You know that no matter what he said, it would make things weird for him. You keep your secret more for him than for yourself really. 
“If I tell you part of it, do you promise to let me leave it at that?” 
“That’s going to be hard.” “Reeemm,” you whine at him. “Alright, alright.” “Well, it’s… it’s about a boy.” He grimaces, and you can’t help but giggle at it. Immediately, “Who?”
“That’s the part you don’t get to know.” “Oh, come on, Y/N, that’s just not fair.” “Please, Remus. It’s just going to make things harder, and weirder, and I want a chance to just move on on my own. Trust me, yeah?” “Fine,” he answers begrudgingly. “But that still doesn’t explain why you’re so upset. If the lads and I have to plan a cruel prank on some undeserving wanker, then I have to know who it is.” 
You’re particularly amused at the idea of James being both pranker and prankee. 
“It’s nothing like that. He’s nice. That’s why I like him so much.” “Yuck.” You roll your eyes at this, and continue. 
“I just found out he likes someone else.” 
Remus’s expression is all understanding, perhaps too much so as the pitying look he gives you makes you feel worse instead of better. “It’s fine, really. That’s life; it happens; what can you do?” “Are we listing trite maxims then?” You roll your eyes again. “Just because 'that’s life' and 'it happens' and 'there’s not much you can do,'” he says with a mocky voice around your phrases, “doesn’t mean you won’t be upset. Or that that isn’t absolute shit.” He smiles sympathetically at you and wraps an arm around you. 
“Yeah,” you sniffle.
“Yeah,” he echoes. “Thanks, Rem. I kind of love you, you know?” You bump into him playfully. “I know. I’m great.” 
“Har har. Wanker.” 
“Hey!” he laughs. “It’s impressive, really, how quickly you can shift from adorable to an arsehole.” 
“Oh, whatever,” you push him off. 
He’s still chuckling when he asks you to come down to dinner with him. You take some convincing, but eventually, after your face looks a bit less cry-y, you walk down to the Great Hall. 
“Hello, lovely!” Lily calls from a few seats ahead. Remus gives you a little hug, squeezing a bit more than he normally would, and sits with his mates, between Sirius and James - annoying, gorgeous, stupid, magnetic James. You’re glad their backs are to you so they don’t notice you’ve been crying, and you hurry down to sit with Lily. 
She notices immediately. 
“What’s wrong, love? You alright?” She puts a consoling hand on your shoulder. “I’m fine, really. Just got a bit caught up in my feelings,” you say trying to end it there, laughing it off. 
“What feelings? You do know that as my best friend, you are contractually obligated to tell me all of these ‘feelings’?” She says “feelings” funny, and you’re glad to be sitting here laughing with her. Until you remember the cause of said feelings. 
“We can talk later,” you lie. You’ll figure out what to say later; you’re too exhausted now. “I just want to comfort eat now, if you don’t mind.” She still seems a bit worried but gives your shoulder a loving squeeze as she says, “‘Course,” and smiles sweetly. 
You’re finishing your dinner when you feel a tap on your shoulder. Your stomach sinks as you turn. There’s Remus… and Sirius… and the source of the tapping: James. 
“Hey, Lupin,” James says. “Evans,” he adds, nodding at Lily, and your stomach churns.
“Hi,” she says. You don’t say anything. You’re too busy picking at your fingernails, gaze down, trying to keep it together. You go to turn back around toward the table, but James’s hand on your shoulder stops you. “Hey, what’s up with you?” he asks jokingly, though it seems more than tinged in concern. 
“Nothing,” and a weak smile. “Are you feeling better?”
You feel your cheeks catch on fire. Remus wouldn’t tell his friends what you told him, right? You hadn’t told him not to, but you thought that was a given. “Yeah, little Lupin, you had me real worried there,” Sirius chimes in. Oh, right. Thank Godric. “Oh, yeah, I’m fine. Sorry for the scare.” You think that’s that, and go to turn again, but again, James gently stops you. 
“That’s good,” he says softly. You have to fight to not roll your eyes - why does he have to be so kind? and thoughtful… and caring… and pretty when he’s worried…
“Are you girls done? Want to walk back up together?” he asks. 
“Sure!” Lily answers enthusiastically before you have a chance to lie and say you aren’t finished. For a moment, it crosses your mind that maybe she does because she likes him too, and your misery returns in full force. 
You say nothing on the walk back up to the tower, and you want to go straight to your room when you get there, but Lily links arms with you and drags you to the sofa before you manage it. She’s sitting on the edge, leaning over chatting to Mary and Marlene on the next sofa, you in the middle, sulking. Remus is reading on the single chair, occasionally glancing up at you, the constant, loving worrier he is. Sirius and James are playing exploding snap just in front of you. You notice Remus’s glances, but you don’t notice James’s. 
As the game ends, Sirius claiming loudly he got cheated, James just laughs, shoves him, and comes to sit next to you. 
“What do you think, Lupin? Best exploding snap player you’ve ever seen, eh?” he jokes, his eyebrow rising. Ugh, he’s funny, too. 
“You could go pro if you wanted,” you play along, exaggeratedly impressed. 
“Oh, I’ve considered it, yeah. You know, if quidditch doesn’t work out.” “You have a better chance at exploding snap,” you tease. “Ouch!” he laughs. “You say nothing all night, and when you do, I get this cruel treatment?” 
You’re surprised he noticed and don’t know what to say. “Seriously, though,” he’s speaking much more softly now. “You okay?” He pauses, biting his bottom lip as if considering something, before continuing, “You seem sad. I know you told Sirius you were sick, but I don’t think that’s true.” 
You panic at the tenderness, at his observant attentiveness, and opt for comedic relief. “You calling me a liar, Potter?” 
He chuckles, rolling his eyes at you, but keeps on. “No, of course not. I’m just saying that, well, you can talk to me. If you ever need to… or just want to, I guess… I mean, just because I’m your brother’s best mate doesn’t mean we can’t be friends, right?” 
Friends. Ouch. You want to cry all over again, the proximity and kindness conflicting too much with the idea that he just wants to be friends, or worse, be friendlier with you just to spend more time with Lily too. 
“We are friends,” you reply. “Yeah? Great,” he smiles. Your heart aches.
“Yeah,” you whisper.
“So you’re okay?” he whispers too. “I’m okay,” you lie. 
“C’mon, Prongs! I need my rematch!” Sirius pulls him off the couch, demanding another game. 
The next few days go by gloomily but normally, and before you know it, it’s the weekend. And not just any weekend, a Hogsmeade one. You, your brother, and all your friends are strolling down the lovely, snow-covered lanes. Usually, you’d be especially happy now. You loved Hogsmeade, especially in the cold snowy months, but you still hadn’t been completely yourself since your emotional let down. 
You’re walking next to Remus, James animatedly talking to him on his other side. You feel invisible. Despite James’s kind words the other night, you can’t help but feel like your brother might as well be an invisibility cloak when you stand next to him. It’s like James just sees Remus; his sister is an afterthought.
You love Hogsmeade trips with your friends, but in your current emotional state, you’d rather be alone, so you subtly break off from the group and go into the nearest shop. It’s filled with magical toys and trinkets, and looking around helps cheer you up a bit. You’re browsing when you see a quidditch-themed exploding snap deck. You roll your eyes at the sky, giving the universe snark for not giving you a moment of peace of mind. Then you grab the deck and head over to the counter.
You’re walking slowly down the street, peering through shop windows, enjoying the cool breeze, when you hear your name called out. You turn to see James jogging toward you. “Where’d you go?” he asks friendly, falling into step with you, his shoulder bumping yours.
“Oh, just wandered off.” “Yeah, I noticed,” he laughs. “I didn’t realize my story was so boring.” 
“Oh, I, no, it wasn’t, I was just, you know,” you mutter, mortified. “I’m kidding, Lupin, relax,” he smiles. 
You smile back though you’re sure you’re blushing. You can blame the cold. 
“That freaks me out a bit,” he says. “What does?” “You and Remus have the exact same smile.” You’ve heard this before. “So it freaks me out that I think yours is so beautiful.” You’ve not heard this before.
You laugh lamely and offer up a weak but heartfelt “thanks.” He just nods. 
Your hands are cold, so you bury them in your pockets, and you’re met with your recent purchase. “Oh,” you start. “I have something for you.” 
“You do?” he sounds unreasonably surprised. “Yeah, just a little thing. Don’t get too excited,” you deflate. You pull the deck out and hand it to him. “This way you still get to think about quidditch while practicing for a more promising career path,” you joke. He doesn’t laugh, though. He looks awed. You don’t know what else to say and are starting to worry you did something awkward. 
He’s looking at the deck in his hand rather than at you when he says, “I really like you.”
You pause. You try to read his expression but struggle with his gaze down like this. “I really like you too,” you respond lightly. He looks up. Standing still, looking at you, he asks, “As your brother’s best friend? Like another brother?” he looks hurt at the word “brother.”
“No.” Honest, without revealing too much. “No?” He steps closer to you. “So if I were to tell you that I really want to kiss you right now…” His empty hand comes up to your cheek, caressing you softly. You smile brighter than you have in several days, much longer probably. He beams back at you in response and closes the gap between you. 
You pull back, and his eyes widen, but when you complain, “You lot already went to the Three Broomsticks? Don’t deny it - you taste like butter beer! We always do that last - I can’t believe you didn’t wait for me!” he laughs a deep laugh, wraps his arm around you, and pulls you close, kissing you harder this time. 
“I’ll buy you two to make up for it,” he says between kisses. He deepens the kiss, gently pushing his tongue against yours. You like the taste of butter beer; you love the taste of James Potter. 
“Bloody hell!” you hear from nearby. Sirius looks like his face can’t make up its mind between surprise, excitement, and confusion. “It was Lupin?! I thought it was Evans!” “You thought what was Evans?” James asks, looking perplexed, his arms still around you. “I thought you fancied Evans!” 
“Why?” The complete confusion and utter sincerity lift a huge weight from you, and you giggle. 
“Dunno, actually. Because I’m a bit of an idiot sometimes, it seems,” Sirius shrugs, seemingly already moving on from the situation. Which is more than could be said of Remus, who is standing stiff with his face blank staring at you. 
“It was James?” he asks, looking slightly disgusted. 
“You didn’t think it was Evans, too, did you?” You joke. 
Lily chimes in from beside Remus, “We would make a really good couple, Y/N.”
“Oi, Evans!” James scolds. “I’m not going to say you wouldn’t because you obviously would, but I’m trying my chances here, thank you very much.” Everyone but Remus bursts into laughter. 
“You might want to look away, Rem,” you say. “I don’t want to upset you, but I’m about to kiss your best friend again.” 
Remus groans and walks away, but you’re already too busy to notice.
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elvendorx · 6 months
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I’ve noticed a lot of Wolfstar fics ignore that Sirius and Remus truly and fully believed the other was a spy. Remus was unaware of the switch because Sirius (and likely James and Lily as well since this whole thing would be their decision as the ones actually affected by it) did not believe Remus could be trusted. Remus spends 12 years wholeheartedly believing Sirius betrayed everyone he claimed to care about and everything he believed in, only changing his mind upon spotting Peter on the map; up until that point, Remus believed Sirius was guilty. I can’t recall off the top of my head if they ever say if Remus also suspected Sirius of being the spy in the First War or if it only happened post-Halloween, but it is entirely possible he did (which would help explain why James goes along with keeping Remus ignorant of the switch. If Remus has fallen so far to distrust Sirius and believe Sirius could ever hurt James, then I could see James thinking Remus never knew either of them at all). Regardless, I’ve never really seen Wolfstar fics address that Sirius and Remus did not have any faith in each other with the First War
(Tangentially related, do you know if they say if Remus distrusted Sirius during the war or if it was only after that Halloween?)
the distrust is a MASSIVE part of remus and sirius' dynamic and i think the fact that they could be part of a close group at school and still suspect each other of murderous and extremist ideals is HUGE. it suggests to me that they were never really that close or that their trust of each other was on the floor - or both. you don't just know someone for seven years and think "yeah they're probably spying for the other side" if you have a generally good relationship. especially if you're suspecting a friend over other members in the order that you don't know as well. this is why wolfstar, especially hogwarts or first war wolfstar, is absolutely wild to me. it crumbles. there's nothing to stick it together. i'm open to like a complex friendship between remus and sirius (because that's what it was) but there's quite an easy to reach line of how far their actual intimacy and endurance of each other's company goes.
and yeah, remus CONTINUING to believe that sirius betrayed james for thirteen years is another layer to this. i can see why he would, given the supposed evidence. but he didn't once question it? also remus perpetuates james and sirius' closeness when he talks about their teenage years so it's extreme to see and acknowledge that kind of bond and to still think that sirius would betray james. like how low is his estimation of sirius? i know that sirius and remus get on post-poa but i really think thats an "everyone else is dead or a death eater" situation. they're united in their lost years post james' death but i think they're still very much personal versions of that loss that they don't resolve or deal with together.
i don't think that james or lily directly suspected remus or truly believed he was a death eater but i think james definitely trusted sirius enough to go with his word, and i don't think either of them would be like "i trust him 100%" but i also don't think they'd be as far convinced that he was the spy as sirius was. i just think that they unequivocally trusted sirius and they put their son first.
also yes, this exchange in poa suggests it was a mutual suspicion at the same time during the war but it's not as explicit or as established as sirius' distrust of remus (which stands alone even if remus never suspected sirius imo):
"Remus!" Pettigrew squeaked, turning to Lupin instead, writhing imploringly in front of him. "You don't believe this, wouldn't Sirius have told you they'd changed the plan?" "Not if he thought I was the spy, Peter," said Lupin. "I assume that's why you didn't tell me, Sirius?" he said casually over Pettigrews head. "Forgive me, Remus," said Black. "Not at all, Padfoot, old friend," said Lupin, who was now rolling up his sleeves. "And will you, in turn, forgive me for believing you were the spy?"
the use of 'the spy' is significant here i think because remus wouldn't have believed that sirius was the spy if he had had no suspicion towards him prior to halloween 1981, he would have said 'traitor' or 'for believing you betrayed james and lily'. 'spy' suggests a longer standing trajectory of suspicion.
so maybe remus had a hint of suspicion that he felt was vindicated when james and lily died or maybe it was fully realised but i always got the impression that remus was more distant from sirius & james (and lily) post-hogwarts and this distance let things fester. idk whether i got this from suggestions in the text tho or whether i just think that's a likely occurrence that allows for james to go along with the suggestion that remus might not be completely trustworthy.
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zeherili-ankhein · 2 months
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My Opinion on certain dead wizards Part – 1
Regulus Black:
Was he a complete saint?
No. He was from a blood supremacist household and had same believes as them for most of his life. He idolized Voldemort and and joined the death eaters, which I think was on his own choice. But he did change his views later on his life and atleast tried to stop Voldemort.
Died in a cave alone drinking potion that shows you your worst trauma and making you feel guilty and then being dragged by dead brainless creatures into a lake. One of the worst ways to die imo.
But was he a complete douchbag?
Now here we have to keep in mind how a person's family background and views can shape that person's own thought process.
It is clearly obvious his parents had fed him all the muggleborn hate things since he was a baby, even more since Sirius turned out to be a rebel. So ofcourse it must have had a huge impact on him.
Clearly he grew up to become the perfect pureblooded son his family had taught/wanted him to be, and to a certain point he even agreed with his family.
Did he deserve redemption?
Yes. Even though he had practically been a Voldy fanboy since forever because of all the above factors, in the one year he spend being a death eaters he had s change of heart. Most probably witnessing all the horrible inhuman shits they actually did.
Something to be noticed – It is canon the process of creating an horcrux is so disgusting the editor vomitted.
Regulus had found out about the horcrux and must have done enough research to know how they are made. So he atleast had his own morals of what is wrong and what is right. He was a Slytherin, and Slytherins are known for following their own rules.
So he did what he could have done at that time and sacrificed himself. Would he have lived should he have been given a second chance? Yes.
(Here I am doing a little comparison with Snape)
His realisation came a lot earlier than it did to Snape. Whose only motivation to be in the light side was because he felt guilty for Lily's death.
But Regulus left the dark side on his own and not because of someone or something. Sure Kreacher was there, but Kreacher had already returned safely and there is no canon proof he did all this just because of his house elf.
I think he deserved redemption more that Snape.
Do I like the fanon version of him?
Debatable. Some of the versions of him in fanon makes sense and I have no problem with them. But some are straight annoying.
Portraying him as a helpless boy who was forced by his family into all the bad things he did or a edgy ray of light boy just takes away the entire point of his redemption.
He will only deserve redemption when he have already spent some of his years being a shitbag.
Regulus x James?
Ohh God!! NO PLEASE NO! I can go on for ages about why don't like them together.
Like if you ship this stay 5 km away from me.
It's just not in his ( or neither James') character to fall for each other.
What makes you think an initially arrogant so called 'blood traitor' Griffindor who had no problems with werewolves or muggleborns will love a initial blood supremacist who believed in Voldemort's views? And vice-versa. That also in their teenage years, the prime time of showing both of their different values.
It's just so annoying.
His relationship with Sirius?
I think they used to be quite close when they were kids but for sure had lots of arguments because of all the Sirius being a Gridfindor rebel thing and him believing his family values.
Might have atleast felt a little bad when Sirius left home and they deserved a chance to reconcile.
Do I love him?
Yes. He had so much potential to be a complex redeemable character if he was written about more. He was grey and that's what makes him great. Atleast in my eyes.
He is one of my favourite characters.
Do I have any headcannons about him?
Ummm quite a few, like
I like the idea of him and Pandora being friends but I also think Pandora was a bit older that him like by two or three years and was in Ravenclaw. So it's interesting how I see him befriending an older Ravenclaw student.
I like to believe both him and Sirius had inherited their looks from their mother, thus making both of them look a lot similar.
He very often got lost in thoughts and would constantly need to be pulled back, because his head was kind of a mess.
There are more but they are minor ones and irrelevant to this post.
Whom do I fancast him as?
On this one I completely agree with the fandom.
It's Timothee Chalamet as R.A.B for me
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partlystiles · 3 years
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Thank God For Quidditch - James Potter
Thank God For Quidditch - James Potter
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james potter x fem!reader (smut)
summary: After Gryffindor fails to win a Quidditch Match, the other team’s captain’s teasing causes something in James to snap and the next thing he knows, he has her falling apart in his grasp.
word count: 4,795
warnings: NSFW, thigh riding, unprotected sex, praise, choking, hair pulling, swearing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nothing inflates someone’s ego like praise. Y/N L/N knew that all too well, spending her days basking in every single compliment thrown her way for whatever she did whether it be someone liking her outfit or talking about the Quidditch game she had won the previous week. Whatever it was, Y/N thrived off of it all and the only thing more buzzing than an actual Quidditch match was the aftermath where people talked about it for hours on end and asked the team captain, Y/N, for a full recount of the match.
The biggest match was the one at the end of the year between the two houses in the finals. Also known as the one that her team had just won, their seeker catching the snitch in her hands with a loud laugh as the crowd erupted with noise and the commentator screamed about her skills. It was always the crowd that spurred Y/N on, their screaming smile and happy shouting making her feel proud of her team and her skills whilst she zoomed after the small little ball in the air.
“Yes, Y/N!” The team yelled in different variations as she flew down to the ground with the snitch still in her hand as the crowd raced each others out of the stands to come down to the field. She dismounted her broom and left it in the pitch before she raced over to her friends and threw herself into the Keeper’s arms and he twirled her around.
The cheering became louder as he lowered her and their heads snapped over to every tower where students were filtering out and running behind Madam Hooch who was approaching with the Quidditch cup in her hands. Other teammates patted her back in congratulations as she took the cup in her hands from Madam Hooch with glinting eyes at her accomplishment.
“Woah!” She exclaimed as the two beaters lifted her onto their shoulders and she was lifted above the shouting crowd with the cup in her hands. Even people supporting Gryffindor in the match were crowding around them and shouting congratulations, cheering with their friends banners instead of their red ones.
There was another sea of red further away from the ones in the crowd and Y/N’s eyes zeroed in on the large number 7 printed on the back of the Gryffindor Captain’s uniform as he walked not-so-calmly towards the changing rooms. He looked on the verge of a temper tantrum and Y/N smirked at the memory of his earlier words.
“Enjoy the pity party after the match, L/N.” James Potter had said, glaring as the two of them shook hands in the centre of the pitch. The grip was tight, both of them seeming like they were trying to cut off one another's circulation so the Chaser couldn’t carry the Quaffle and the Seeker couldn’t grasp the snitch.
“I’m sure you’ll throw it great, I’ll be at the actual party with the rest of my winning team.” She replied, a bitter smile on her lips as her crescent nails scraped over the material of his glove in the tight grip.
“It’s nice to have dreams, even if they are pathetically unrealistic.” He shrugged his shoulders as they let go of each others hands on Madam Hooch’s orders and walked away from each other to mount their brooms and fly up to their starting positions.
She had vowed to make him eat his words which thanks to her wonderful Quidditch skills, he had and now he was storming back to the changing rooms one second away from snapping his beloved broomstick in anger. Sirius Black was walking close to him and the other members of the team were walking back up to the castle instead of the changing rooms. 
“Put me down, put me down.” Y/N laughed as she tapped one the heads of the two team members holding her up in the air; they let her down with a laugh and being up there was definitely better than being down on the floor where people were still cheering. “I’m gonna go rub it in Potter’s face.”
“Have fun.” Cory Michaels, one of the Beaters who had held her up, leaned down in excitement to kiss her cheek before he pushed her away and she started to worm her way through the crowd.
The praise followed her out of the clump and she soaked it all in with a smile whilst squeezing through the gaps between people  who milled around the edge of the large ground, someone yelled and she glanced back with a scoff to see Cory being held in the air with cup that she had given to Cressida Bridge in his hands. 
Jacob Jones was one of the last people who complimented the game on her way out of the circle, after she had passed him she broke into a small jog to get to her destination. The changing rooms weren’t that far away from the centre of the pitch but it was a fair distance, Y/N would do her bragging then return to her common room for the afterparty...there was always something inside her that itched to make James angry especially after Quidditch matches. 
It was the way his eyebrows scrunched in irritation or the way that his cheeks flushed a bright red from the effort and sweat glistened on his skin from flying around the pitch and tossing the Quaffle around. Y/N was sweaty too, slipping the gloves off of her hands as she walked so they were free of their confines and the breeze hit them almost immediately because of her jogging.
Slowing down into a walk as she got closer to the changing room, she took off her shin guards and held them with her gloves. She was half-tempted to take her ponytail out but decided against it until she was having her shower and could cool herself down. 
A few metres in front of her, the doors to the changing rooms opened and Sirius Black came out with pursed lips as he shut the door behind him and went to start walking but he froze at the sight of the opposite teams captain walking towards him. She had a smirk on her face, her eyes glinting with mischief as she stared at Sirius and he shook his head slowly towards her, his own smile peeking up.
“Not a good idea, beautiful.” He said as she got closer but all she did was smile at him and give him a small chuckle as she passed and he started walking with a smile. “Your funeral.”
Disregarding his comment, Y/N slowly pushed open the door to the changing room and saw Potter tugging a shirt on with his back to her. It was a simple white t-shirt and black jeans but he tugged the top on so aggressively that she wanted to laugh but just settled on closing the door and leaning against it before throwing her gloves and shin guards down onto the nearest bench with a clatter.
“I don’t want to hear it, Padfoot, you made your point.” He grumbled as he grabbed a bottle from his bag and put it up his shirt, spraying it in the direction of his armpits and Y/N wrinkled her nose up in disgust. “I’m overreacting.”
“I don’t know what a padfoot is-” She began to say and James jumped out of his skin as he whirled around and nearly stumbled whilst putting the cap back on his aftershave. “- but I’m not it.”
His expression turned sour as he stared at her and he turned back to his belongings to start packing his uniform in his Quidditch bag quickly, more aggressive now that she was in the room. “Come to gloat?”
“Yes, actually.” Y/N nodded with a smile and pushed herself off of the wall, walking closer to where James was packing his stuff up and she leaned against the wall beside that instead, meeting James’ eyes as he glanced at her. “What happened out there? You’re bad anyway, but today you were horrible.”
“Shut up.” He scowled, grabbing his red jersey and stuffing it into the bag on top of the Quidditch sweats they were all made to wear. Y/N only smirked slightly wide as she saw that she was affecting him.
“I mean, the Finbourgh Flick was a good tactic.” She continued casually as the rustling of the clothes got louder and James breathed more heavily in anger. “Too bad it didn’t work.”
“Quit it, will you?” He snapped at her, eyes flaring as the eye contact was made but he looked away with a rising and falling chest. 
“The reverse pass was good on your part as a Chaser.” Y/N continued and James’ hands fumbled with his stuff whilst his face heated up with the humiliation and the anger. He glared heatedly her had the urge to just...push her into a wall and kiss her right on the mouth so she would shut up.
What?! He blinked for a second, erasing the thought from his mind with a shake of his head...the thought of kissing her should disgust him but through his angry haze he didn’t seem to be bothered whilst looking away from her features that glowed and glistened with a thin layer of sweat that looked disgustingly enticing in that moment.
“But that failed too...” She frowned mockingly and he glanced back up, eyebrows furrowing in anger and his hands itched to press her shoulders against the wall she was leaning on. Rendering her speechless. So he could have a moment of peace. “Your chasing skills were okay but same couldn’t be said for your captaincy...should’ve brushed them all up on their passes. That’s on you.”
He snapped, jerking away from his bag and towards her, his hands reaching to her arms as he slammed her back against the wall she was leaning on in anger and shoved his lips against hers to shut her up. She jolted slightly at the impact but she accepted the kiss as he stood an inch apart from her, hands gripping at her arms and eyes closing but still full with anger at the sight of her though they softened slightly behind is eyelids when he realised he had just pinned someone against the wall, kissed them roughly and let his anger get the best of him.
He pulled away just as roughly, panting whilst his eyes searched every detail on her face in fear he had made her uncomfortable in any way; it hadn’t been his intention but she just made him so mad. “I’m, uh, sorry.”
She panted just as heavily as him, her breath having been stolen by the way he slammed her against the wall and then his lips had pressed against hers with vigour. Though as his blazing eyes searched her face, he found no sign of uncomfortableness or disgust, instead he saw the smirk twitch at her lips again.
“Don’t apologise.” She breathlessly told him, licking her lips and James eyed the wetness that now covered them as he gulped at the sight and his eyes flicked back up to hers again. “Do it again if you’d like.”
Then she winked at him and James swore he went into cardiac arrest for a moment but he regained himself quickly before looking at the wetness on her lips and diving in again, pressing his lips roughly against hers before pulling back and doing it again and again and again. Like he was addicted. But he was still angry which he didn’t understand...James’ grip tightened on her arms slightly as he took a step closer so their noses nearly touched and he kissed her on the lips again.
Y/N responded as best she could, but the kisses he delivered were short and rough, not ones were she could give him the pleasure of kissing back. So she just let him attack her lips with his, feeling them bruise with every bit of pressure was put onto them with his endless kisses that came again and again and again. Every kiss got him more worked up it seemed and for one of them, he planted his lips onto hers and just pressed them there for longer, letting the feeling consume him.
She had no problem with it, just wished he would do something else to stimulate her building arousal. James grunted at one point and she prepared herself for his touch, his tongue pressed against her lips and she opened them immediately, welcoming him inside with a small, escaped breath. His tongue circled around hers, moving around her mouth as they groaned in unison. 
Y/N desperately wanted to touch him somehow, but he still had her arms in his tight grip despite the fact that he was almost pressed against her completely and there wasn’t even any way she would want to leave now. She moved her tongue too and he grunted again, finally moving his hands from her arms to her his but still keeping her pressed against the wall.
She moved her arms out to wrap around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer to her and letting her hands play with his hair, tugging at it slightly and making him groan as his hands travelled slightly higher but he stopped when he realised she was more or less still in her full Quidditch Uniform
He disregarded that fact for a minute and let his lips travel down across her jaw to her neck where he ducked his head down and she leant hers back to give him more access, his lips sucked gently at the skin as he kissed her neck and gave the occasional blow which caused a shiver down her back and the slightest arch.
James chuckled lowly at her back arching slightly and she groaned slightly at the sound and the breath on her neck, his kisses went further up her neck until he was dangerously close to her and she felt them skim her earlobe before his voice invaded her hearing. “I knew you liked me.”
She could practically hear the cocky smirk through the small laugh as he nipped gently at her earlobe before travelling his kisses back down to her neck. Y/N rolled her eyes and used her hands to grab James’ face before bringing him to face her. Both of them were breathing heavily and James quirked his eyebrows up at her as she made them meet eyes.
“Shut up.” She said to him breathlessly, pulling him back in to connect their lips and he smiled into the kiss they shared before he went serious again and stuck his tongue into her mouth again. 
And again she welcomed it eagerly, the muscles circling around each other as they engaged themselves in a rough and passionate make out. James grabbed at her waist and pulled her right up against him, off of the wall so he could unzip the back of the jersey and push it off of her. He didn’t bother to unbutton the cape that attached at the bottom of the jersey so he just let it fall with it. 
So now she was just in her long-sleeved black shirt, her black joggers and her boots. Y/N quickly discarded of her shoes, throwing them to the side and letting her sock-covered feet land on the hard wooden floor below her before she pulled her socks off too.
 James didn’t waste any time in grabbing her by the back of her thighs and using his remarkable strength to hike her up so her legs wrapped around his waist and they engaged back in a heated kiss with his hands squeezing at her thighs and her hands running through his already messy hair.
He moved backwards as they kissed, both of their lips surely bruised by now from the roughness of their kissing. The feeling of her body against his was intoxicating and she craved so much more. James lowered himself onto one of the benches so she was now straddling him and they kept kissing one another, their heavy breathing loud amongst the thickening air of the changing rooms. 
Caught up in the moment, Y/N grinded against James who groaned into their kiss and put his hands on her ass, squeezing as she grinded again and their tongues found solace touching the other. Soft breathy moans from Y/N and small groans from James filled the changing room and she felt thankful for the rest of the team deciding to shower back up at the castle instead of in the changing rooms.
James started to kiss at the skin on her neck, sucking and pecking it as Y/N continued to grind on him with her small moans. “Want you to ride my thigh.”
“What?” She breathed out, breath catching in her throat as he started sucking in the same spot for a while, surely leaving a mark. 
“I want you...” He smoothed his tongue over the spot where he’d been sucking and Y/N exhaled shakily, bucking her hips. “to ride” He peppered kisses across the extra expanse of skin until his mouth had trailed up to her ear and he lowered his voice down to a whisper. “my thigh.”
“Okay.” Y/N moaned out softly and moved from straddling both of his thighs to straddling only one and looking at him to make eye contact, his eyes were alight yet dark with lust as he looked at her and before she started moving, his fingers ghosted over the hem of her shirt.
He pulled it off of her and she raised her arms so it slipped off easily and he threw it across the changing rooms without looking for an exact place to throw it. He then pulled his own shirt off and threw it away too. 
His eyes were too busy travelling over the sight of her bra-covered chest and marvelling at the way it perfectly pushed up her breasts to where he could bury his face in them and kiss at the skin which made her moan out again as his hands groped at them hungrily. She tilted her head back as she felt his thumbs trace over the material of the cups and her nipples began to harden in arousal.
His fingers travelled around to her back and he unhooked her bra, pulling it off of her shoulders and throwing it in the direction of her shirt. He put his hands on her breasts again, groping at them and kissing them too, his hands just felt better now that it was skin on skin. 
“Move, baby.” He whispered against her skin and she breathed softly as she began to drag herself along his thigh, feeling the faint stimulation as the joggers pressed against her knickers and her knickers pressed against her vagina.
A shiver went up her spine as she continued to move against him, breathing shakily and getting faster with every rut. He flexed his thigh from underneath her and moved his hands away from her breasts towards her ass to move her faster against his thigh which had her gasping and gripping his shoulders and moaning whilst the stimulation against her clit got faster and rougher and his hands were squeezing her ass harshly. 
He groaned as she bucked faster, moaning whilst her fingers pressed into his skin and muscle. James even started to bounce his thigh which sent sparks of pleasure through her as her tits started to bounce on her chest and James watched them hungrily whilst they went up and down over and over and over again until she was a moaning mess on his body.
“I’m gonna-” She cut herself off with a loud moan, rutting faster in chase of her release as James leaned forward and stuffed his face into her neck, kissing and sucking and even nipping slightly at the skin there as he continued to bounce his hip. “I’m gonna cum.”
“Cum for me, L/N.” He whispered roughly into her ear, squeezing her ass hard enough to leave a bruise as he bounced quicker and listened to the pretty noises that she let loose. “Do it for me.”
“For you,” She breathed out in a moan, tilting her head back whilst she thrusted faster and the lewd noises escaped her with no hesitation. “All for you.”
“All for me.” James chuckled into her ear and with one last loud cry of pleasure, Y/N released and continued to shake and stutter in her rhythm as she rode out of her high and James softly kissed her through it. “Well done, my girl.”
Y/N let her hands loosen their tight grip on him as she panted after her orgasm, letting her palms massage his shoulders instead of gripping them tight. James rubbed her ass before moving his hands up her back to smooth over the skin of her back whilst she calmed down.
“We’re not done yet.” He whispered into her ear and she moaned softly again at the declaration. James began to stand, making Y/N stand too and he slowly lowered his hands to pluck at the waistband of her joggers. 
He crouched slowly, bringing the joggers down with him until they were pooled at her feet and she stepped out of them. His fingers travelled back up to get the waistband of her knickers and he pulled them down next, smiling cockily at the sight of the glistening wetness inside of it. She stepped out of those too and James stood back up with them still in his hand, her grabbed her face in his hand and showed them to her as her cheeks squished in his hold.
“Made such a mess.” He tutted, moving his hand that held her face so she was shaking her head. The confidence and dominance radiated off of him like he was a raging fire spreading smoke up into the air, Y/N loved it and the way he held her face in one hand made her go crazy. 
James threw her knickers away too and she was left naked in front of her half-naked Quidditch nemesis. Who knew that this is where they would end up? Y/N moved her hand, getting the urge to make him feel good and she reached out towards his joggers, wanting to touch the bulge that had grown there but James grasped her hand before she could touch it and tutted again.
“I wanna make you feel as good as you made me.” She told him, words muffled by his hand squishing her cheeks but he understood her anyway by the way he smirked at her.
“You will make me feel good.” He released her cheeks and grabbed her hips instead, pulling her against him so her breasts pressed against his bare chest and she groaned slightly at the feeling. “By letting me fuck you until you can’t remember your own name.”
Y/N moaned at the thought, trying to pull him down for a kiss but James pulled away which made her whine slightly. He chuckled at her noise as he began to walk them back against the wall and she shivered once her back pressed against the cold tiles and James towered over her with an aura of dominance. The rustling of his pants made her look down to where he was pushing both his joggers and his boxers down his legs before stepping out of them.
Y/N’s eyes trained to his erection and she licked her lips at the sight before looking up to James who smirked at the look in her eyes before wrapping his own hand around his dick and pumping it just to tease her because he said she couldn’t do it before. He let go of his dick, crouched and looped his arms underneath her thighs, guiding her legs to wrap around his waist like they had before as her weight was supported against the wall.
She moaned slightly as her pussy touched his bare body and he just smirked at her before pushing his hard dick into her with no prior prepping and enjoying the way her head tilted back against the wall with a large moan scraping at her throat. He went in slowly, watching her mouth fall agape further as one of her hands pressed against the wall behind her another grappled at his shoulder, with every inch that went in, the wider her mouth fell with the pleasurable pain he was delivering.
James bottomed out and held himself in there for a couple of seconds, kissing at her neck and sucking another mark whilst she got comfortable. His other one he had made stood out as a bright red blotch on the side of her neck and James kissed at that again, Y/N whimpering at the touch.
He began to pull out in a slow pace before taking his time pushing back in, he continued the slow pace as he let her get used to it. The feeling was remarkable and Y/N moaned softly as he slid in and out of her agonisingly slow.
“Faster.” She panted, her chest heaving and James stopped altogether, bringing her to whimper but then his mouth was against her ear again.
“As you wish.” He said, his raspy voice heavenly in her ears and she allowed herself to revel in it for a moment before her peace was interrupted by James’ hips slamming into her and causing a loud moan to pour out of her lips as he kept thrusting into her whilst she balanced herself against the wall.
His thrusts were relentless, in and out over and over. He spoke through gritted teeth whilst slamming and thrusting into Y/N. Moans were spilling from her lips with no mercy and her tits were bouncing up and down over and over as James   kept up his rough pace. He pulled out all the way and then slammed back in over and over and over again with praise and profanities spilling shamelessly from him. 
“Yeah, my good girl, fuck yeah.”
At his words, she let out moans which were met with groans from James as he thrusted in and out with his eyes on his girlfriends breasts which were bouncing for his view and Y/N attempted to bounce herself back on his dick with a screwed up face from the pleasure whilst her eyes tried to peak down at where James was thrusting into her but he reached back and pulled their hair so they were looking up at the ceiling of the changing rooms.
“James-” She cut herself off, their eyes rolling back in their head as James put a hand around her throat and laughed at their fucked out expression and went impossibly faster into her. The moan that she wanted to let out was blocked by his hand gripping her neck tightly, his fingers pressing into the skin whilst the sound of skin slapping echoed around the rooms.
“You like my hand around your pretty neck?” He grunted and she nodded, her hand on his shoulder going to touch his arms as a whimper made its way out and James laughed lowly. “Use your words, sweetheart.”
“Y-Yes.” She choked out, moaning as James loosened his grip slightly when he felt his orgasm approaching. Y/N could feel her own, the coil slowly tightening in the pits of her stomach as her eyes rolled back again and James groaned louder. “James, fuck me.”
“Come on, baby.” He moaned, going faster and Y/N whimpered repetitively as his dick brushed against her g-spot and it prodded at the pressure point repeatedly. “Come on. Cum all over me, my good girl, cum on my dick.”
His words sent multiple shivers down her spine and finally, with motivation from James’ thrusts against her g-spot and his hand tightening on her neck again at the chase for his own release, Y/N let go and had her second orgasm all over James’ dick that was still pounding into her but starting to stutter in it’s rhythm. She clenched around him and it took a lot of self-control for James to pull out and let his own cum squirt up all over her torso.
Once both of their orgasms had mulled over, Y/N leaned her head forward and rested her forehead on James’ as they both panted and their chests went up and down in unison. James tilted his head so his lips could catch hers and Y/N responded softly, the kiss softer than their rough ones which had started the whole thing off.
“Thank god for Quidditch, huh?” Y/N muttered against his lips and he managed a chuckle, the two of them naked and sweaty but still laughing with each other after a failed match for one of them.
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proserpina-magnus · 3 years
Text
Regulus Black dating a muggleborn
word count: 2863
[ warning; gender neutral reader, mention of death, description of crying, angst, no happy fucking ending, swearing, mention of lap sitting (none sexual), kissing, awkward teen love, regulus is kind of edgy and a dick sometimes ]
Fanon Regulus, not Canon. This doesn't line up with anything canon! So please do not take this seriously.
- Did I say dating? I meant secretly dating.
- Regulus spotted you studying alone at a table in The Three Broomsticks, he just couldn't hide the part of him that felt an intriguing feeling towards you.
- He asked a few people around, nudging them and gesturing towards you, asking a small "who are they?"
- It took him a few days to finally get someone to answer him and once he knew your name, he knew he'd fallen into a rabbit hole. he couldn't stop thinking about you, his mind twirling around your name in a constant spiral.
- Luckily, you had been partnered with him for a potions assignment. he couldn't talk to you, he couldn't even mutter a "hi" he was so nervous.
- He had never felt this nervous feeling in his stomach, it was coming to the point it was drowning him.
- Finally, the next day during potions he was able to gain enough courage and actually talk to you about the project, though his voice sounded so mellow and drawn out, like honey.
- He didn't try to engage in conversation other than the assignment, so when you offered that you and him could go to the library and do a bit more research, he said yes almost immediately.
- You both decided to go after dinner since the library wasn't as filled in the evening.
- So when he came back to his dorm after eating, he tried to change into something more casual than his school uniform. it took him a good 15 minutes to pick what he deemed was fit for the occasion.
- He was just about ready to step out the door with his books until his dormmate said something that caught his interest.
- "you're meeting up with your potions partner, arent you?"
- "Yeah, why?'
- "Nothing, it's just their a mudblood, you shouldn't be hanging around those types of people"
- "oh... I didn't know they were a... mudblood"
- 'yeah, nasty they are. you should just ditch 'em"
- So regulus did, he ditched you. he felt guilty, leaving you all alone in the library. you must had thought he was another pureblood prick.
- His conclusion was right, you waited for a good thirty minutes for him. When you realized he wasn't coming, you just decided to do the whole project yourself, it was better if you could just get this stupid assignment done yourself so you'd both could go your separate ways.
- The next day when he got to potions class, he saw you pass in a report to Professor Slughorn. He felt his stomach drop, he knew well enough you had finished the assignment last night without him.
- After class, he caught up with you, pulling you aside as he watched you stare up at him blankly.
- "what?" you had asked him, a hand on your hip as you gave an annoyed sigh.
- "I'm sorry I ditched you, I just didn't know you were a... muggle-born" he admitted, looking anywhere but your eyes as he caught a few of Slytherin boys looking at the two of you.
- "whatever, Black"
- " you didn't have to do the whole assignment, I would have helped you."
- Your eyes met the Slytherin boys who were watching you both, you gave a pitiful frown.
- " don't worry about it, I get it. next time, just tell the professor you don't want to work with me. don't lead me on for a stupid joke"
- He didn't get to explain himself as he watched you walk away, he felt horrible. he had never felt this deep connection to someone before, it made his heart sink when he watched you turn the corner.
- A few months pass, he hadn't gotten another opportunity to talk to you again. he felt like an idiot, he had a chance and he completely blew it,
- Late at night, regulus would stare at his ceiling and dream about what would happen if he had just done what he wanted if he had gone to finish the assignment with you. You both would meet up, exchange dislikes and likes, talk about your dreams for the future.
- He couldn't focus on quidditch, it was coming more frequent of his team captain yelling at him.
- Luckily, he had gotten another opportunity to talk to you again. both of you were selected to be a part of the slug club. Regulus was going to say no, but when he heard your name get mentioned, he joined.
- The first dinner party of slug club, was like a dream. his eyes scanned over your outfit and how it looked absolutely pleasing on your body. his eyes kept siding over to where you sat and when you caught him, he would just look away.
- After a few more meetings, he was done with the 'whole looking away whenever you looked at him' ,  there were only a few more months of Hogwarts left. his eyes met yours and he didn't look away, he gave a smile.
- When you had smiled back, he couldn't help but smile a bit wider, his cheeks glowing with a red flame.
- The next meeting, you had sat next to him. it didn't take long until you both had been exchanging words and stories, laughing at jokes and giving each other shy looks.
- After a dinner meeting during slug club, Regulus offered to walk you back to your house common room. (if you are in Slytherin, then he would just walk with you till you both had to go separate ways to your dorm).
- Once you arrived at your destination, it was awkward. He looked anywhere but you, his face was hot with red as he began to get flustered.
- You had said a quiet goodbye, turning to head back to your dorm but he grabbed your hand. Holding you back as he stiffened up and asked you out.
- "will you go out with me? This weekend, it's a Hogsmeade trip, I'll pay." His words were hard, but his body language was a complete mess.
- "you're not gonna ditch me again are you?"
- "no, defiantly not ." His words had still been raw and hard, he felt like he was going to throw up butterflies.
- "I'm a muggle-born, I heard you purebloods don't really like us very much. This kind of seems like a set-up"
- God you hoped it wasn't a set-up, ever since you've sat next to regulus at the slug club meetings, he had stolen your heart.
- "It might become an issue for some... people, but it doesn't bother me much"
- Regulus was defiantly not good at phrasing things, especially romantic feelings.
- You didn't take his words too seriously, you debated for a minute. You wanted to go with him, it felt like every nerve was alive.
- "Alright, one date couldn't hurt" with your words, you leaned up to kiss his cheek.
- "goodnight Regulus" ... and then you had disappointed out of his view. Once you reached your dorm, you screamed into your pillow with excitement.
- The date went well, you both had gone to the three broomsticks sticks and sat at a table near the very back.
- You had talked about everything you could, Though he made sure to stay away from the conversation of his family. He didn't want to ruin the date by mentioning his pureblood supremacist family. It's sorta a mood killer.
- You both stayed out of busy spots, even hiding and giggling in a bush as his dorm mates passed.
- That was your first kiss with regulus, tangled in bushes and twigs as you heard footsteps fading. His lips were soft, his hand coming to rest on your cheek.
- When you pulled away, both of you were flushed and looking towards the soil. He walked you back to Hogwarts, separating ways.
- You both couldn't see each other often, only giving each other looks in class or exchanging waves when passing each other in the hallways.
- It was fine for a few months, though the secret meetings were stressful yet fun. You didn't want to hide anymore, which resulted in your first fight.
- "don't you get it? I can't be seen with you! I've told you about my family. They don't like muggle-borns, this Voldemort guy doesn't either and I can't risk exposing our relationship! You'll get hurt!"
- "I don't care if I get hurt Regulus! Our love shouldn't be hidden because your afraid of what people will think! I'm tired of this sneaking around, I'm sick of it!"
- The fighting continued for minutes, both exchanging hateful words. At one point he had said something very vial, saying he couldn't be seen with someone like yourself.
- "What is that suppose to mean?" You sneered at him, eyes tearing up as your arms crossed over your chest.
- "you know damn well what it means," he said back, quick and hard as he just glared down at you.
- You huffed, turning away as you wiped at your cheek. You turned back, shaking your head at him before disappearing out of the room.
- He stayed in the room for a while, thinking about everything. He was so angry, his veins were about to pop from frustration. He hated his family, he couldn't believe that he would lose the one he loved because of his ratchet mother and father.
- He went to Sirius, which was a first in forever. He explained everything to him, he told him how he was sneaking around with a muggle-born and how he didn't want to stop loving you.
- Sirius smirked, thinking he had finally gotten Regulus to betray their spoiled family. Sirius talked his ear off, telling him that he was glad he was gonna change himself and come join the hated family member club.
- Regulus didn't just want to leave the family, he wanted revenge.
- He disregarded Sirius, telling him to piss off and leave him alone for a while.
- The end of 6th year was coming up and Regulus wasn't given any chance to speak to you. He knew damn well you both hadn't separated, just fought. Though he laid in bed at night and worried so hard he thought his brain was gonna rot.
- On the train, he made sure to pull you into a compartment with just you and him. Shutting the blinds so no one will disturb you both.
- "Regulus I don't want to talk to you"
- "I can't meet with you or write to you all summer, I'm not putting up with this break anymore. I only have 2 hours with you and I'm not wasting it."
- "aren't you afraid you're gonna be spotted with me?" ... Regulus wasn't quite good at sarcasm (HA! As if) but he knew well enough from the tone of your voice that you weren't too happy.
- Regulus sighed hard, watching you look out the window as you played with the bottom of your shirt; tucking it in and out of your skirt/trousers (or whatever you're comfortable in).
- "I'm going to do something crazy over the summer break and I don't know if it's going to work but all I know is if I can protect you, I will."
- "regulus what are you talking about?" You asked, you felt worry build up in your stomach. You reached out, grabbing his hand.
- He instantly interlocked your fingers together, he moved to your side as he stared deep into your eyes. His eyes always looked so cold, but right now in this moment, they felt warm.
- "I love you, honestly, if I could marry you right now I would"
- He denied to speak about what he said before, he didn't give you any more information.
- Halfway through the ride, you had been positioned on his lap. His arms looped around your waist as his head rested in the crook of your neck. He let you play with his hands.
- " I love you too" you mumbled in the quiet atmosphere. Regulus held you tighter at the words.
- "hmm?" He hummed, wanting you to say those words again.
- " you told me you loved me, I didn't say it back. But I do love you regulus, I love all of you."
- Regulus felt himself smiling, he couldn't stop the wide grin as he nudged his head into yours lovingly.
- "I can't wait to see you after the summer break" you whispered to him, kissing his forehead as you felt the train start to slow down.
- Dread filled the empty spaces as you hugged each other as tight as possible, not wanting to let go.
- "it's alright, I'll see you after summer. I promise" he whispered into your ear, before bringing your lips to his and kissing one last time.
- The kiss felt like fireworks, there was so much longing and passion mixed into it you didn't want it to end.
- Sadly, the kiss ended and regulus soon disappeared in the crowd of people.
- That summer, regulus had gotten the death mark, he reeked of anger and emptiness. All he wanted was to see you again, to hold you in his arms and kiss you until you both couldn't breathe.
- He had gotten close to Voldemort, he played all the deatheaters with his fake words and praises. He had learned about Voldemort's Horcruxes.
- Regulus had sat at dinner, fork pressed into his hand as he thought hard. His love for you was so strong, he would kill for it.
- He counted down the days until summer break would end.
- 2 more weeks.... 13 days... 11 days... 8 days...
- On the 7th day before September 1st, his plan came to action. He would destroy Voldemort's Horcrux and defeat him and after, he would live 7th year in peace.
- Though his plans didn't come to a win. It stormed and rages of rain came upon him as he made his way to the cave. All he could hear was his heartbeat and the sound of rain outside, along with the padding of Kreacher feet.
- He could hear his breath, his eyes casting over every edge and dark spot. He smiled, he was going to do it, he was going to defeat Voldemort.
- "Whatever I say Kreacher, don't listen. Just keep feeding me the water"
- Kreacher grumbled, "of course, sir"
- "for you love, all for you" regulus whispered before dipping the shell into the crevasse, bringing it to his lips as he took a sip.
- Drinking the liquid felt like poison, regulus had to fight himself to not throw it up.
- The liquid was almost gone, but Kreacher had to take regulus place and force-feed him. Regulus was begging and thrashing, saying whatever came to mind.
- Regulus couldn't finish the drink, weird slimy skeletons climbed from the water surrounding them. Regulus was in a horrid state he couldn't even tell.
- When Kreacher finally force-feed him the last of it, regulus mind came to stillness. His limbs too weak, but he was able to understand that the weird-looking skeletons were not friends.
- "Kreacher, take the Horcrux and go! Hide it! Try anything to destroy it! Go!" He had yelled out, voice dry and strangled.
- Kreacher had to obey by request, he snapped his fingers and disappeared with the Horcrux.
- Regulus tried to fight, his wand shook in his hand as he casts spells after spells. It worked for a few minutes, but there was only one of him and so many of them.
- Regulus was pulled into the water, he kicked and thrashed in spite of trying to get loose. He couldn't swim even if he escaped, his eyes stared through the muddy water as his lungs filled with it.
- Regulus thought of you, your smile, the first time you kissed him, the way your hand fit in his so perfectly, the way you would send him kind eyes whenever he passed you in the halls.
- He sank, and of course his body was dead, but his mind was still there. He was barely conscious enough, but he was there. His body limp and rotten as the years pass.
- His disappearance travelled fast, you had heard first on the train.
- The first years had wondered why a a 7th year was weeping so bad that they couldn't even stand properly.
- You shook hard, gasping and not even trying to grab anything as you sank to the floor of the train. You couldn't care that people were giving you looks, your boyfriend was gone.
- Regulus was gone.
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st0nesnglitter · 3 years
Text
The boss
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This man, this fucking man, will be the death of me
Also it’s the gifs fault this has taken so long cause I’ve just been staring at him
Also thanks to @quindolyn who helped me write a part of this so I could get it out
Disclaimer: This is just a piece of fiction and the abuse of this power balance isn’t acceptable.
Smut lol
The constant tapping of keys could make you mad sometimes, a pattering melody that indicated that time was passing during your work days. The job was simple. Check emails, answer the phone and keep track of his schedule. During the months of working for Mr. Black you had also developed a habit of ordering his lunch. In his top drawer he always had some crappy candy to keep him going, sometimes walking down to the floor below to get himself a coffee, and nothing more. So you asked him if he wanted a sandwich when you got back from your lunch break and kept doing it ever since.
The sound of buzzing pulled you from your thoughts and you looked down to press the intercom button.
“What do you need, sir?” You asked politely and looked over at the calendar to make sure you haven’t forgotten anything.
“Will you please get in here?” Sirius responded before dropping the conversation, keeping pleasantries short.
You stood up and straightened out your skirt before walking around your desk. Even though didn’t need to you gave the door a small knock before opening the door to his office.
“What can I help you with?” You asked sweetly and closed the door behind you.
Sirius sat behind his pitch black desk wearing just a dress shirt and slacks, his jacket descarded over the stiff sofa by the window. His hair was pulled into a bun that sat at the bottom of his neck, a couple curls had sprung free and framed his face.
“Can you look over these forms for me and then get them down to HR?” He asked holding a folder up toward you and you stepped forward to take it.
“Sure, should I make copies and get them back here or are HR filing them?” You asked as you flipped through the papers to get an understanding of what they were about.
“Tell them to file them, don’t want to put any more work load on you, love” he said and looked up with a smile, before turning back to his screen, “that’s all”.
You took the folder and walked out to your desk again, a little more flushed in the face than when you walked in. Before you took the job you had heard how the boss was harsh and pretty mean when he wanted to, but Sirius seemed to have taken a liking to you. He had only spoken kind words to you and had never made you worked overtime. In the mornings he always greeted you, sometimes staying to have a chat about the day ahead, and if he didn’t stay to work late into the night he always bid you goodbye.
Your thoughts started to wander into a daydream as you tried to read the forms he had given you, slowly drifting to some rather inappropriate thoughts to have about your boss. But how could you not when he looked like that? Eyes shining like the moon with such a depth that could make anyone lose their breath, hair silky and shiny that fell over his shoulders perfectly and the most blinding smile. How you got to see him so dressed everyday always made your mind wander to how he looked under his clothes. And his hands, oh his hands, were the most glorious things you’ve seen. The rings he wears, the way the veins pop out when he grips a pen and how he gestures to make his point clear always made you drool and your knees buckle. It always ended up with you thinking about how his hands would feel on you.
You shook your head to rid the thoughts and took a deep breath. After lazily reading through you walked three offices over to give them over to HR. The secretary behind the desk was unfamiliar to you and you greeted him with a smile, making some small talk before walking back to your desk.
The rest of your work day was uneventful. Talking with other companies over the phone, planning meetings and updating Sirius’ schedule over the next month.
Two men walked in for an afternoon meeting and you decided to take a little break, going down to the nearest cafe.
When the two men came back out you met them with a smile and the blonde one walked up to your desk.
”He wants you to in there” he said before giving you a quick nod.
You finished up the email you were writing and went into the office. Sirius sat behind his desk with his jaw clenched, fingers tapping against the wood of the table.
“What’s wrong Sir?” It was clear that something was wrong with Sirius, tension radiated off of him, if the physical signs weren’t clear enough.
“Close the door please,” he commanded with a stern tone and a slight unpleasant feeling washed over you as his irritation was now directed toward you. For the whole time you had worked for him he had never been harsh against you.
Closing the door behind you, making sure it latched, you walked further into his office and thoughts were flashing in your head. Is he going go fire you? Did something happen to the deal? Was it your fault?
“Did those men bother you?” He asked, his eyes holding yours with what seemed like a kindness hidden behind layers of despise and
You furrowed your brow in confusion, had you missed something? The only words they had uttered to you was about him wanting you in his office.
“No sir, is something the matter?” He was silent, “Did they agree to your proposal? Should I begin the paperwork?”
He scoffed, leaning back further in his chair, “I won’t be doing business with them. I’m sorry if you wasted your time with beginning the paperwork.”
“It’s fine, I didn’t start it but may I ask why not? It seemed like a promising partnership.”
Sirius sighed as he massaged the bridge of his nose, seemingly very upset over something. When he didn’t answer right away you opened your mouth to say some rushed apology if you overstepped some boundaries, but then his cool grey eyes shot up at you.
“They said some very unprofessional things about you and I don’t wanna validate their statements by going into a partnership with them”.
You were slightly taken aback by his statement: both relieved that you were not the one who explicitly did something but also even more stressed since he blew off a big deal because of you.
“Mr. Black, if I’m in some way am standing in the way of this deal I can stand back, work behind the scen-“ you started but got cut off by him standing up abruptly.
“You did not do anything wrong. They’re just sexist pigs who obviously never been in the presence of a gorgeous woman” he muttered out, dropping the professionalism and the proper words, shifting the energy in the room.
He turned around to look at you, the line in between his eyebrows softening and he slowly tilted his head.
“M’ sorry, didn’t mean to put this in you” Sirius put his hands in his back pockets and pulled his lips into a thin line.
“I’m just confused why you aren’t more upset about the deal” you said honestly, feeling comfortable to share your thoughts in the more casual conversation you had, “I’ve been planning sub-meetings for weeks”.
“They disrespected you! Said some shit about you being a trophy” he sighed and leaned against the front of his desk, “can’t stand stuff like that”.
Your eyebrows knitted together tighter and let your head fall into a shake as you huffed slightly.
“Don’t understand why I go higher than a multi million dollar deal”.
Sirius looked back up to you again and sighed, but not as frustrated anymore.
“You really don’t get it, huh?” He asked, mostly rhetorically, but was encouraged to continue when he saw your little shake, “you are ethereal. You have this magnetism to you and I’ve tried to stay away but it’s so fucking hard!”
You gasped slightly at his word and in a haze from his compliments you took two small steps forward, getting closer to him.
“Why don’t you try not staying away from me?” You asked in a quiet voice, almost like you didn’t want him to hear.
But, oh, did he hear you and he closed the gap in between you, soft lips grazing yours. He stopped his movements right before it became an actual kiss, savoring the moment before crashing into you.
The kiss went from slow and reassuringly to heated in a matter of minutes and you started to grip onto him harder, pulling him as close as possible. But as his kiss went down your neck you realized where you were and who you were doing this with.
“We.. we maybe shouldn’t do it here, in your office” you whimpered out, but your grip on him to get him closer, “you’re my boss”.
His lips kept attacking your neck, sucking and biting, and he huffed at your comment.
”We can stop if you want, just say the words” he challenged and nipped extra hard at your neck.
You shook your head violently and let out a gasp at the feeling of his teeth grazing your skin, right by your pulsepoint.
“You’re a teenage wet dream” he pulled away to look at you, his lips a little swollen, “the sexy secretary”. He punctuated his words by grabbing a handful of your ass.
Sirius’ lips went back to your neck but slower this time. The passion was still their but it felt like he made an attempt to savor it, to take his time. His hands gripped onto your hips to push you closer to him.
“Do you know how many times I’ve wanted to bend you over my desk?” He growled as he pulled off his tie, snapping you out of your shock and your hand went to help him with the buttons of his white shirt.
His movements were harsh but you were always comfortable, he kept pulling away for eye-contact to make sure you weren’t regretting anything. And in your frenzy of pulling at the fabrics around his body your brushed against the package in his pants and his whole self tensed up. At first the placement of your movements and his reaction didn’t connect, but when it clicked you laughed breathlessly and started to palm his softly.
“Did that feel good, Mr. Black?” You asked as innocently as you could when you stood there with your skirt hiked up, red marks all over your neck and with your hand on your boss’ bulge.
“Oh you little minx” he growled before reaching for the buttons of your blouse.
Slowly the black fabric of your bra started showing and he let his forehead fall onto your shoulder, letting out a low groan, before taking in the view that was your chest. His eyes raked over your figure and a mix between a giddy smile and a mischievous smirk found its way onto his lips.
“You’re gorgeous, and all for me, huh?” He asked as his bottom lip got caught under his teeth.
You backed up so you could rest your butt against his desk, pushing his shirt off of his shoulders. Sirius’ hands found their way to the back of your skirt, fiddling with the zipper until he felt the nod of your head, pulling it down so you could step out of the garment.
When he got a glance of the black fabric of your panties that matched the bra he let his head fall back. You weren’t ashamed to admit that a chunk if your paycheck went to pretty underwear, one of your favorite ways of self-care.
He started undoing his pants as he watched you, eyes slightly glazed, and with his full attention on your body you felt a surge of confidence and your hands went behind your back to unclasp your bra. You let it fall to the ground, next to the rest of your clothes, and you smiled proudly at him.
“You’re gonna be the death of me” he muttered as he grabbed onto you again, kicking his pants of off him, “gotta be quick, love, and I promise to make it up to you”.
Sirius hooked two fingers under the waistband of your underwear and slid them down your legs, kissing his way back up. Somehow he had pulled down his boxers too and your eyes went down to see the most glorious dick you’ve ever seen. Instinctively you went down to grab it but he caught you.
“Can’t right now darling, gotta be inside you right now or I might combust” he grabbed onto your hips and placed you firmly on the desk.
With your legs spread he had easy access to slowly push into you, eyes trained on yours to detect any discomfort. Your breath hitched as you felt him stretch you out, dragging a hand through his raven hair.
“Fuckin’ hell, you feel so good” he let his head once again fall against your shoulder as he slowly brought his hips away from you, feeling every intricate detail of your inner walls.
The lazy pace didn’t last long though as his hips started to snap into yours, a rush flowing through his veins to make you feel as good as possible. You wrapped your legs around him and hooked your feet at small of your back.
“Harder Sirius, please” you whined, slightly embarrassed that he had made you so desperate so quickly, but the pleasure that resulted in your command let those thoughts fall out of your head quickly.
The sound in his office was downright filthy as you both moaned out loud, skin slapping against each other. Even though you were at a considerably public place that didn’t stop the noises that he pulled out of you.
“Fuck you’re so big, sir” you didn’t mean to utter the title in that moment, your need to be professional hardwired into you, and you felt Sirius slow down slightly.
“Say that again” he demanded.
“Yo-you’re so big... sir” you mewled out and his eyes scrunched together.
The speed that his hips were moving most have been close to speed of light, your body moving around like a ragdoll on the furniture. A pressure was forming in your lower stomach and an urgent need for release filled you. Your hand went down to rub at your clit but he swatted it away to do it himself.
“Are you getting close?” He breathed out, his thumb moving deliciously over your bundle of nerves.
The combination of stimulation got you so close that you couldn’t even utter the words before crashing over the edge. The way you squeezed him got him there too, filling you up with warm ropes of cum.
The two of you stood there for a while, foreheads pressed together, and basked in this new form of intimacy. Sirius slowly moved to pull out of you and let out a puff of laugh as he looked down at his clock.
“Seems like I might have kept you in the office after hours” Sirius smiled brightly at you and you shook your head with a giggle.
“Fine by me if that’s the work I do after hours.”
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kohanayaki · 3 years
Text
.:Time and Time Again:. (Marauders Era x Reader) Ch 5
Harry confronts you with a familiar piece of suspiciously folded parchment, and you tell him the story of how you helped create it (mostly told through flashbacks taking place in the Marauders era).
LINKS:   CH 1   CH 2    CH 3   CH 4   CH 5   CH 6   CH 7   CH 8
___________________________________________________________
Ch 5 .:Narrow Spaces and New Alliances:. 
Your eyes drifted open slowly, the bright streams of sunlight coming in through your window strangely unbecoming of 12 Grimmauld Place. It took you a moment to get your bearings as you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes and remembered where you were. As you sat there, looking around Sirius' guest bedroom, last night's events all seemed to flood back to you at once. You groaned into the comforter, feeling your face burn as you recalled blatantly staring at his lips just minutes after crying into his shirt for at least half an hour.
Come on, get it together, you thought to yourself, you're here because Dumbledore summoned you, stay on task.
However, as soon as that memory left your head another replaced it, this one weighing heavier on your chest. You found yourself thinking back to your encounter with Severus. Well, as much as you could call it an 'encounter.' Even when you couldn't see him, you could feel him when you reached out to him with your mind. Severus was good at blocking legillemency— too good, in fact, because you would know the familiar force of his mental shield anywhere. You'd never felt it as powerful coming from anyone else. You almost laughed at the irony of it; the very thing he was trying to use to keep hidden was exactly what had given him away. That, and the smell of him, which took you back to the moment you'd first smelled that damn amortentia potion. . .
You tried to shake off the thought as you properly got out of bed and changed into some casual clothes. The next Order meeting wasn't until tomorrow afternoon, so you had the day mostly to yourself, but you knew the next time you were all in a room together you would have to address some things privately if you had any hope of working together efficiently. You gently padded down the wooden stairs, the door to Sirius' room still closed. He never was an early riser.
As you reached the kitchen you began to put a pot of coffee on when you heard someone approach the room, stalling in the kitchen entrance. You turned around to see Harry in the doorway.
“Morning,” you grinned, turning back to the counter and using your wand to bring some water to a boil, “Coffee? Tea?”
“Oh,” Harry said, a bit embarrassed you'd caught him in mid-thought, “no, I'm okay.”
“What's on your mind?” you asked.
“Um, I was wondering if you could tell me, I mean, if you have the time. . .” he trailed off, reaching for his back pocket, “well, the thing is, a few years ago I found—”
“Kreacher heard sounds coming from the kitchen and did not expect (Y/n)'s return,” Harry jumped at the house elf's sudden arrival, but you seemed unphased.  
“Though master's half mudblood godson remains here,” the elf muttered to himself, “How many more days must it be?”
“Hello, Kreacher,” you greeted him, “nothing nasty about Harry, now, alright? Don't forget he's my godson too.”
“Of course,” Kreacher said, thickly sarcastic but with respect for you in his tone nonetheless. His permanent frown seemed to deepen, however, when he saw you next to the coffee maker. “(Y/n) of house (L/n) should not have to be using the kitchen. Mistress Black would have wept to see a pureblood use muggle equipment. If (Y/n) requires refreshment Kreacher will have it ready.”
“There's no need for that,” you said, “Besides, it's done already, see? You can go on now.”
Kreacher squinted at the cup you poured for yourself. “Always peculiar,” he grumbled, stalking away at your request and muttering to himself all the while.
“He's oddly. . . nice to you,” Harry said, green eyes quizzical behind his round-framed glasses.
“He is,” you chuckled.
“But, well, you're—”
“A blood traitor?” you gave him an easy smile when you saw his expression, easing his fears that he'd actually offended you. “I know,” you said, “he's been through a lot, it's complicated. Trust me, he wasn't always like this to me. It takes time. And it doesn't hurt to be nice to him either.”
Harry decided against bringing up that the nicest person that he knew to the house elf was Hermione, who Kreacher regularly called a 'mudblood wench,' but decided to focus on the 'taking time' part of your statement, wondering  just how long this kind of progress took with the spiteful elf. Besides, you seemed to have some sort of history with him.
“Anyways, what was it you were saying?” you asked Harry.
“Oh, right,” he said, reaching back around him, “um, my friends Fred and George, you've met them?”
“Molly and Arthur's twins, of course,” you smiled, “little imps, they are. Those two could give your father and Sirius a run for their money.”
“Right!” Harry said, “well, that's sort of the point. They're the ones who gave me this.”
As you turned around to face him you stalled mid-stir, nearly dropping your mug as you did. Even as a piece of blank parchment you knew what it was, the distinctive accordion folds that met in the center giving it away.
“How in the world. . .” you trailed off as Harry handed it to you, “but Filch—”
“Didn't do a very good job of hiding it, apparently,” Harry finished, “I thought you might want to do the honors?”
You nodded wordlessly, a pang of unexpected emotion hitting you as you pressed your wand to the map's center.
“I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.”
The faded, brown ink showed itself as its protection charm was washed away, revealing the nostalgia-inducing inscription scrawled in your respective handwritings:
Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, Prongs, and Fangs are proud to present: The Marauders Map
“Do Remus and Sirius know you have this?” you asked Harry, who nodded.
“Professor Lupin gave it back to me third year before he left Hogwarts,” he said, “but he never told me anything about it after that.” he seemed deep in thought for a moment before looking up at you. “If everyone else is who I think it is, you're Fangs, right?”
It was your turn to nod now.
“I always wondered, how did you do it?” Harry said, hardly containing his curiosity, and you couldn't help but think how much he looked like James in that moment. “How does it work? What sort of magic did you use? All the secret passageways, how did you find them?”
“Alright, slow down,” you laughed lightly, giving in, “I suppose there's no harm in telling you.”
Harry brightened at that, bounding into the living room and taking a seat on the couch as if to say 'we've got all day,' which you did. It warmed your heart to see him so excited, this was one of the only ways he could get to know his parents— through the stories that remained from the people who loved them. If you could help the picture of his family in his mind become a bit clearer, you would tell him any story he wanted to know. He deserved that much after everything he'd been through.
You took a seat opposite him, still nursing your cup of coffee.
“Well,” you said, “it's a long story, starting with how bad those lot were at keeping secrets. . .”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   1974   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Run!” James half shouted half laughed as Filch hobbled after the four of them. Sirius nearly bit his tongue trying to keep in his laughter as the Caretaker slung insults and promises of punishment their way, cat ears and a tail freshly sprouted from his body.
“I can't believe we actually did that,” Sirius cackled, keeping easy pace with James.
“I can't believe you dragged me into this,” Remus panted, his current body not lending itself well to physical activity. For once he actually wished he was a werewolf right about now.
“I don't know if I can keep up,” Peter wheezed, falling behind.
“Oh come on,” James said, grabbing his sleeve and helping him run, “we can out run a gummy-legged old prat like him.”
“I don't know, he's faster than he looks,” Remus pointed out as Filch rounded the corner behind them.
“Damn,” James cursed under his breath, “we'll lose him if we can make it to the one-eyed-witch passageway.”
“We'll never activate it in time,” Remus countered.
“The hallway behind the third floor tapestry?” Peter suggested.
“No, Filch knows about that one now,” Sirius said.
“Why the hell didn't you bring your cloak?” Remus huffed.
“Well getting caught wasn't supposed to be part of the plan, but someone had to let out a laugh before we could get out!”
“Just save your air and sprint!” Sirius hissed.
The extended run time was starting to catch up to all of them now, and when they'd made a wrong turn to a blocked off corridor they thought they were done for.
“Hey, morons, over here!”
Four heads snapped towards the sound of your whisper, but you were nowhere to be found. Suddenly, one of the light pillars began to shift, revealing a large crack in the wall just big enough for them to fit sideways.
No questions were asked with no time to waste, and the four boys clamored after one another so they could fit inside. Your magic moved the pillar back in place just in time, and you watched from your hiding spot as Filch reached the walled-off passage in surprise, grumbling as he looked around for the culprits behind you. You had to stifle a snicker as his cat ears lowered; was that growling coming from the back of this throat or did you imagine that? Eventually he stumbled off in frustration and you sighed.
“Alright, the coast is clear,” you said.
“Why did you help us?” James rose a brow, that signature shit-eating grin back on his face like it never left, “you haven't fallen in love with me since our truce, have you?”
“Dream on, Potter,” you rolled your eyes, pushing him out of the crevice and smirking as he tumbled to the floor.
“It seems like I'm always saving you nowadays,” you said, stepping out of the wall yourself with the rest of the boys following.
Remus was thoroughly confused, looking pointedly between you and Sirius. He knew you and James were pretty much friends now, but he also noticed that the hostile air that always seemed to be present with you and the elder Black had diminished. He'd even seen you two talking in the halls lately. Sirius gave him a look; he would explain what happened in the forest with Lucius to Remus later. Mostly he didn't want to admit that Remus was right about you not being so bad if he gave you a chance; you had actually been getting on pretty well since that night.
“You do realize it's no fun winning the house cup when you four practically make Gryffindor ineligible every year with all the shit you get up to, right?” you chuckled, “some competition would be nice for a change.”
“We'll see if you're singing the same tune when Quidditch season rolls around,” James said smugly.
“You're right,” you said, squaring up against him, “guess that's a new competition we've got going for us.”
It had recently been announced that you and James had both been selected to play Seeker for your respective houses next year. It was an arrangement that had the whole school talking, your rivalry turned (mostly) friendship now infamous, even if it was a recent occurrence.
“Hold on, how did you know that was there?” Peter asked you, pointing to the moving column, “even we didn't know about it.”
“Oh?” you crossed your arms, “and are you four supposedly some kind of all-knowing secret masters? Because clearly there's things you don't know about yet.”
Sirius slapped a hand over Peter's mouth before he could retaliate and give away what they've been working on.
“Yes, well, apparently,” he said, ignoring Peter's muffled protests.
You looked at them curiously, all four boys looking suspiciously nervous.
The next day at breakfast, James had brought up the idea of 'hiring' you to help them finish the map.
“I'm telling you, I think we can really make progress with their help,” he pitched, “they clearly know what they're talking about, and we know they can pull a hell of a prank from all the times they've gotten me.”
“How do we know they won't tell anyone?” Peter countered, “I don't know what's up with you, but you're trusting them too fast, James.”
“They're not the type that would tell,” Remus admitted.
“Oh, not you too!” Peter whined.
“I'm just saying, they'll likely appreciate what we've gathered so far and have a fair bit to add,” Lupin insisted, “it could be worth a try if you really want to finish it before we graduate—”
“Finish what?”
The four boys jolted upright, turning to see you and Lily.
“Are you guys okay?” Lily asked, concern written across her features.
“Of course!”
“Never better!”
“Why wouldn't we be?”
Remus just groaned at his friends' panicked answers. This was hopeless.
You and Lily shared a knowing look off the the side.
“Alright, whatever you say. . .”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Harry laughed heartily,
“Wow, I mean, I know you said they were bad, but that bad?”
“For being expert pranksters who hardly ever managed to get caught, they were remarkably terrible at hiding things,” you said, chuckling along with him, “It didn't take us long to figure out they were up to something, although they seemed to think they were brilliant at covering it up, Remus had to burst their bubble eventually.”
Harry shook his head, smiling fondly and imagining all the scenes in his head as you continued your tale.
“So that was when they were first starting to put the map together,” you continued, “but that wasn't even the biggest secret they were hiding. Of course, I wouldn't find out about that for another year, but we'll get to that part of the story later. . .”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   1975   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“This tastes awful,” Sirius complained, trying to ignore the plant prodding the under-side of his tongue.
“Well if you were expecting treacle toffee I'm sorry to disappoint,” James rolled his eyes, equally nauseated by the bitter tinge of the Mandrake leaf in his mouth.
“There's no way someone can do this for an entire month,” Peter said, “How do you brush your teeth? What if you accidentally swallow it when you're eating?”
“You three have fun with that,” Remus chuckled, flipping through an old library book and his mouth gratefully leafless.
“How about some gratitude, Moony?” James said, “We're doing this for you.”
“Please, you just want to see if you can turn into a dragon or something,” Lupin chortled, “and you don't actually have to go through with all this. Who knows if this animagus stuff will actually work.”
“Well, a dragon would suit me,” James mused, “but of course we're going to see this through, mate. You know we'd do anything for you.”
Remus smiled to himself, not responding and not needing to. He knew.
“Hey guys,” you grinned, walking up to the Gryffindor table.
Peter gulped suddenly in surprise as you came up behind him, and his eyes widened in horror.
“Shit!” he coughed out, “I-I swallowed it!”
“Your. . . food?” you questioned, glancing over at the boys who all had that same, vaguely panicked look about them.
“Okay, it was funny at first, but you guys have been acting weird since last year and now it's worrying,” you admitted.
The four looked between themselves and came to a sort of silent conclusion. Maybe in this scenario it was better to tell one secret to keep the other. And so, later that night, they told you to meet them after lights out so they could tell you what was really going on. You snuck out of your dorm room and made your way through the secret tunnel to the Gryffindor common room, a route you'd taken plenty of times to mess with James.
You pushed a loose panel of wood open, coming into the warmly lit space through one of the cabinets. You pushed an armchair that was half blocking your path out of the way as you crawled through the space.
“Blimey!” Sirius jumped, “give us a heads up, would you?”
“Sush,” Remus scolded him, “you really don't understand the concept of an inside voice, do you?”
“Alright, well I'm here,” you said, brushing off your robes, “now what's this big secret? This better not be a trick because I've been working on a new hex.”
“Nothing like that,” James assured you, “we've been working on something we think you might be interested in, if you're willing to contribute.”
He stepped to the side so you could see the floor where they'd been huddled around and your eyes widened.
“Merlin,” you said. The red and gold carpet was covered in at least forty different pieces of parchment. Pages upon pages overlapped with each other, each messily detailing a different part and level of the castle in scribbles of smudged ink. “This is. . .”
“The entirety of the Hogwarts castle and surrounding land,” Sirius said proudly, “complete with secret passageways.”
“This is our lives' work, (Y/n),” James said, “be impressed!”
“What impresses me most is how none of you have any sense of scale,” you said, sifting through the papers, “you should really condense this. Kind of hard to make any use of a map if you have to flip to page thirty-three to find the kitchens.”
“Point taken,” Remus said, “it could do with some reorganization.”
“And probably a bigger piece of paper,” you mentioned.
“Right, that. . .”
“That's not all there is to it, though,” Peter said, “Sirius?”
The curly haired boy stepped forward, pressing his wand to the center of the floor.
“Revelare Popularis,”
You watched in wonder as hundreds of names suddenly appeared across the pieces of paper, all students and faculty you recognized. They were scrawled in Sirius' handwriting, as if he'd written them himself.
“This spell shows where everyone in any location on this map is at this very moment,” he said, “It's not exact, and we've been working on variations.”
“So you can plan ahead without getting caught,” you mused, “how'd you learn something as advanced as this, Black?”
“I get around,” Sirius shrugged, unabashedly showing off. Peter rolled his eyes.
“So, the only drawback, of course, is that the spell doesn't work in real time,” Remus said, “so by the time you get where you need to go. . .”
“People will have moved,” James finished, “we're willing to share this little trove of knowledge with you if you're willing to give up all the secret rooms, passages, and hiding places you know.”
“And we thought you may have a solution to our timing problem,” Remus said, “I could tell from our study sessions you quite enjoy learning ahead of your year.”
Your eyes scanned the pages, and you were admittedly impressed. There was ton of stuff on here you had no idea about, but you knew a fair amount was missing as well. It seemed like a fair trade.
“I'm in,” you said.
“What?” Peter blinked, “it was that easy?”
“This is a useful tool you've got,” you said, “I think we can all benefit from it being improved. And now that you mention it, I actually do think I've read about a similar spell to that paper charm. It was in some Gaelic tome in the restricted section on ancient magic. I'm not even sure it used a wand. It was called the Homunculus charm. From what I read it sounded like it acted as a live feed for people in any given location, clan leaders used it to plan ambushes and keep track of citizens. If we could link it to the entire castle. . .”
“We'd be able to see where everyone is—”
“And what they're doing—”
“—At every hour of every day!”
“True, albeit a bit stalkerish,” you quipped, “you let me in on this if I add in what I know, and you got yourself a deal.”
James put out his hand, and as tempted as you were to turn it green or make all the bones in it disappear, you reached out and shook it.
“I do believe this puts us in a formal alliance, Potter,” you said cheekily.
“I believe so,” James smirked.
“Terrifying,” Remus chuckled, “This school won't even know what hit it.”
“Well, what are we waiting for?” James said with a cheshire grin, “let's steal ourselves a book, shall we?”
Read chapter 6 here!
Taglist:  @sleep-i-ness, @blackpinkdolan, @parker-natasha, @ornella0910 @undertaker1827 @thatwierdo-koemi @nxstalgicnxbxdy @calaryssia @aleksanderwh0r3 @mialupin1
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coffee--writes · 3 years
Text
The Message on the Wall
Pairing: James Potter x gn!Reader - Marauders x Reader Content
Word Count: 5.9k (jdklfdh im sorry) 
Warnings: Underage Drinking, Implications of... yeah. I think that’s about it. 
Requested: Yes, a long time (i feel bad for only getting to it but i hope the nonnie stuck around to see this piece) by an anon who asked for James x Reader with childhood best friends to lovers trope. 
Summary: In which, James Potter was busy writing himself a message on the wall but was too blind to read what he had to say. 
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Pictures. 
In actuality they were only images. For Muggles, they stood stagnant, for James Potter they moved slightly. 
But in deeper meaning pictures were moments in time captured in a frame. They were a personal reminder of things that were, things that used to be and anything else that didn’t fall into one of the other two categories. 
James Potter adored pictures. His room was littered with them. A handful were of Quidditch players and Tutshill Tornados merchandise. One picture of him and his parents sat on the nightstand beside his bed. But adjourned on the wall to the left was a mostly blank wall. One small Tornados banner was pinned against the soft red paint and in the middle a picture he was particularly fond of. 
The film captured James at the age of four. A broom was clutched in his left hand and a toothy smile on his face as the wind rustled his hair causing it to stick up more than it already did. Beside him was you, your eyes crossed and your tongue licking a swirled lolly. 
When his mother had shown him the picture you had just left for home, making a young James quite sad that his friend couldn’t stay just a little longer. Euphemia Potter had smiled, handing the picture to her son. “It’s okay, my love. Now you have a piece of Y/N with you.” 
“How?” James had asked, his lower lip jutting out in a frown. 
Euphemia laughed. “The picture captures you together. Look how happy the two of you look!” she points at her son’s smile in the photo. “You can do whatever you’d like with it.” 
James grinned, his eyes lighting up once more. “I want to hang it, mum!” he dragged her hand into the bedroom with him, climbing on top of his bedsheets and pressing the picture to the wall. “Here. That way I can say goodnight to them even when they're not here.” 
Euphemia Potter smiled watching as her son tucked himself under the covers. “That’s a brilliant idea, James.” With a wave of her wand, two pins fastened themself to the wall, the photo beneath. 
That was the beginning of James’s love for pictures. More pictures would accumulate such as the one of him and his father at a Tornados game. Drawings you would give him of flowers and Kneazles. The pictures would come and go but yours stayed the same. An additional picture of you and James would later be added three years later when the two of you were seven. James’s broom no longer sat in one hand, instead was gripped with two and hovering five feet off the ground. He had a wicked smile on his face, his glasses slightly falling down his nose. You sat behind him, your small fingers clutching to his waist as the picture captured you mid-squeal. 
Time went on yet the pictures of the two of you stayed the same. Along with your drawings, which had improved dramatically since you were seven, he’d occasionally find a Hollyhead Harpies banner plastered to his wall. When he came to scold you, pink banners adjourned in his hand, you’d laugh at the pout on his lips. He could never stay angry at you and always joined in on your laughter. 
The final year before things would slightly change was the year before going to Hogwarts.  A third picture was added at the age of ten. The Potter family had accompanied your family on a trip to Diagon Alley in which you had bought your screech owl, Juniper. James had one arm wrapped around you. His hair was untidy and a goofy smile was on his face as his other hand flicked your forehead. Your eyes were closed mid-laugh as one hand pushed his face away and the other perched with Juniper who screeched happily on your available arm. 
Again, time went on quickly and changes were made in James Potter’s room but you were not one of them. He packed up his Hogwarts things the night of August 31st, leaving his room full of pictures with a soft smile. 
You rode on the train with him, both of you waving goodbye to your loved ones. You grinned at him wickedly, “Excited?” you ask. 
“Definitely.” he responded. “Do you have money for the trolley?” 
You slide into a train compartment, one small boy already sitting there. “Yeah. Do you need to borrow some?” 
James nodded and you rolled your eyes, handing money over to the kind witch who passed by, grabbing pumpkin pasties for you and Bertie Botts for James. 
The ride was life-changing as you made acquaintances with similar mindsets. Two more boys entered your compartment and along with the scrawny boy from before, all of you made it to Gryffindor. “Where dwell the brave at heart” as James liked to put it. 
First year was an interesting feat with James quickly falling head over heels for Lily Evans. Your friendship never faltered although the thought of her in his life made you feel odd. However, you were sure she wouldn’t be in his life for quite some time seeing as his persistent efforts were met with an equally stubborn rejection. 
“She’s a firecracker, that one.” he sighed, walking beside you down the hall after another devastating encounter with Lily. 
“You’re just embarrassing yourself now, my boy.” you reply, dubbing his nickname to ease the comment. 
He smirked. “Then why do you hang out with me?” 
“Because, I’m the one who makes sure you don’t cross the line from embarrassing to mortifying.” 
He shakes his head with a silly grin. “I doubt that. You love me. That’s why.” 
You laugh, an effective way of avoiding the curious ideas that ran through your young mind. “Don’t throw around the l- word so quickly! You’ve got to mean it.” 
James bumped your side. “But I’ve known you for years.” 
You ruffle his hair, making it messier than it already was. “Save it for Evans.” 
---
The year ended and the two of you went home to Northern England hands overflowing with Gryffindor red, spirits high with a drive for Quidditch practice and addresses from Remus, Peter, and Sirius tucked away in your pockets. 
James’s room changed tremendously that first year. Alongside the Tutshill Tornados merchandise were small Gryffindor banners, lions enchanted to roar at the touch. You had given him one of your sketches from the school year, one of Sirius and him laughing in Transfiguration, another of him and Peter skipping stones. The pictures of the two of you still remained, a small collection of dust coating the edges which he wiped away with a smile. 
Second year was merry and full of high spirits. James had acquired his father’s invisibility cloak which gave cause to a number of nighttime rendezvous and adventures in the kitchens. Suspicion arose on Remus, whose monthly disappearances came to your attention. With the help of Sirius and Peter, the group soon discovered Remus’s guarded secret and accepted the furry little problem with open arms. 
The Lily Evans situation did not get any better with James’s persistence holding up fiercely and her hatred toward him even more harsh. As Sirius had dubbed it, “Mate, at this point you’re never getting married.” Remus and Peter whole-heartedly agreed, sending James into an adolescent spiral. 
“What if I don’t get married, Y/N/N?” he confided in you by the shores of the Black Lake. 
You chuckled, his delirium quite adorable. “You’re going to get married, James. Trust me.” 
He sighed, snapping a twig between his fingers. “It’s not definite.” 
“Nothing is.” you counter. 
James groaned. “I know. I know. But I would like it to be. Wouldn’t you?” 
You contemplated the idea, a thought coming to your head. “What if it could be?” 
He stared at you curiously. Your eyes lit up and James grinned. “Hit me.” 
“If by the time we are thirty neither of us are married then we should get married to each other.” you propose, a proud smile on your face. “That way we can have a definite of our own.” 
James grinned. “I like that idea. But what if one of us gets married before that?”
You frown. “Then I guess it’d be a flop. But it’s better than nothing, right?” 
He agreed quickly. The sun was setting into a pond of pink. The wind rustled and birds chirped and the moment seemed picture perfect and James wished a camera would magically pop up and capture the moment so he’d be able to hang it on his wall for years to come. It did not work that way, instead, he turned to you with a smirk. “I don’t have anything to propose with.” 
You looked down in embarrassment and gave him a shove. “We’re not getting married yet! It’s just a deal not the real thing.” 
He rolled his eyes at you. “I know but it feels as though something special should happen. How about we seal with a spit swear?” 
You stick your tongue out and pretend to gag. “Ew! No.” you flick his forehead causing him to wince. He grins before flicking you back, watching as you fall back onto the grass. 
“I guess a flick works as well.” he sighs. “Y/N Potter has a nice ring to it.” 
Your head falls against his shoulder. “I can’t believe I might be a Potter one day. Sounds disgusting.” 
James laughs, the weight of your head feeling oddly familiar against his shoulder. “Oh, shut it!” 
--- 
The years came and went. Third year, James made the Quidditch team and he quickly became a ladies man despite his obvious pining over Evans. You made sure to keep his feet on the ground as you didn’t want his ego to get larger than it already was. You came to all his games, occasionally bringing a camera so that James could add his moments of glory onto his beloved room wall. There was the time he tried dedicating a shot to you and ended up getting knocked off his broom by a Beater. 
He made the next one thankfully. 
On the other hand, you had earned the title of master dueler amongst the third years for your quick arm and sharp spellcasting. While James was at Quidditch practice: you, Peter, Remus, and Sirius would practice in empty classrooms although after a while they became rather bored as you would always win. James would cheer you on, even when you beat him there was a compliment of your skill and he was more than anything, proud. 
The summer between third and fourth year was the year the Marauders got their first group picture together. Everyone had met up at the Potter residence, Euphemia Potter snapping the photo with Sirius and James to the left, Peter and Remus on the right, and you in the middle. James hung the picture on his wall as it was routine by now. The whole gang got to see his famous wall of pictures, his life an open storybook to anyone who looked closely. 
Fourth year sparked love, pranks, and new ideas. Peter went on his first date, flaming at the cheeks as his friends waved him off embarrassingly. Group pranks ensued upon Snape whose oily hair was dyed all colors of the rainbow by the end of the first semester. You had gone on your first date as well, Steven Goldstein from Hufflepuff whom James threatened to beat up and Sirius who gave him “a talk”. 
Most importantly, the group addressed Remus’s furry little problem seeing as each year he came back with more and more scars than before. Two ideas sparked up from the meeting and both were large feats that every member of the group was willing to take. 
“So wait..” Peter asked. “You want to make a map… that tracks everyone in Hogwarts?” 
James nodded and Remus shook his head. “That’s exactly what I’m saying. Don’t look at me that way, Remus.” 
Remus shoved him lightly. “How would that even work though? Isn’t it a little invasive?” 
You smiled. “It most certainly is invasive but think about how awesome it’d be to have something like that. All we would need is…” 
“A complex locator spell.” you and Sirius said together. 
Everyone grinned. “Pete can do the drawing and sketching. He’s good at that stuff. We should check for secret passageways. All of us could do the magic. We’ve got the brains.” 
“I don’t think someone with brilliant magic technique would use the word brain to describe their intelligence.” you point out. James simply flicked you in the head. 
“And there’s the Animagi thing…” Sirius added. 
“That’s a reach.” Remus replied. 
“More than the map?” Peter questioned. 
Remus sighed. “You guys don’t have to do that for me. I’ve been transforming on my own for years. No need to have buddies now.” 
“Nonsense.” you say. “Anything for you, Rem. This is what you deserve.” 
The friends looked at each other silently. “Are we ready to pull off the biggest student feat in Hogwarts history?” Sirius whispered. 
“Aye, aye.” Everyone cheered. 
Peter grinned. “We’re up to no good.” 
James smiled back. “Then let us manage our mischief well.” 
WIth that the group commenced, exiting the abandoned classroom they used and taking off to class. James walked by your side as you headed to astronomy together. 
“I can’t wait till we pin this down. It’s going to be an epic year.” he grinned. 
You chuckle. “I know you’ll end up stalking someone, Potter. Evans by the looks of it.” 
He shook his head, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “Nope. I’m gonna stalk you instead. See if you’re hiding any secrets from me.” 
You smile. “What secrets could I possibly be hiding from you, my boy?” 
James nudged your side with a smirk. “You’re telling me a good-looking fellow like yourself isn’t sneaking off with some other lad other than their best friends.” 
You shook your head, the word “good-looking” repeating itself in your mind. “No. If I did I would tell you.” 
“Good.” he said, starting up the stairs to the Astronomy tower. “I don’t need some arsehole stealing you away from me.” 
You roll your eyes. “No one could ever steal me from you, James. I’m not a Quaffle.” 
He nods with a grin. “Yeah. I suppose you’re more of a Snitch.” 
You laugh, dashing up the stairs in hopes that you wouldn’t be late for your Astronomy lesson.
--- 
As one could guess more pictures and sketches made their home on James Potter’s wall. It was a cluttered mess but beautiful nonetheless. It was as though the wall had an expression of its own with its array of Quidditch jerseys, photographs, art, and ticket stubs. Nobody touched the wall except James as he liked having every picture in place. His wall organized the way he liked it best… messy. 
Fifth year was the first year you didn’t see James every week. He had eagerly signed up for Quidditch camp and had left for Wales with promises that’d you write about the boys and the progress on the map and Animagi projects. The projects went well with Peter completing the outline sketches of the maps, Remus filling piles of papers on Animagi transformations and finally Sirius and you gathering the needed ingredients for the Animagi process. 
You had grown taller over the summer, hair lightening and your features more accentuated. Eagerly you awaited James’s return and when the time did come you had woken up early in the morning to see him arrive by Portkey on the hill. The second he appeared you had rushed over, engulfing him in a hug. You had missed his touch, his constant nagging and overall  the James Potterness that followed him around that would never fade with time. 
Meanwhile, he was left out of breath, a couple of inches taller and a smile on his face as he squeezed you back. “Y/N/N! I missed you, you lazy hag.” 
You laughed, messing up his hair that sat more neatly than in previous years. “And I missed you, my boy.” 
The next days before school were spent catching him up on the map and at the pond by your house. With each swim you noticed the changes in James such as the six-pack the tedious trials at Quidditch camp had given him. 
“Oi!” you shouted, splashing him in the face. “Whatever happened to the skinny twig that was my friend?” 
He smirked. “Oi! Why are you looking?” 
You bit your lip, not allowing him to see you flustered. “I’m sorry. You’re my best friend and it’s a very noticeable change!” you pointed at his toned stomach. 
James tapped your nose and you stared at him in annoyance. “It’s only noticeable if you want to notice it.” 
He turned around, making to walk back to the shore of the pond. You didn’t remember when James had gotten so cheeky although he’d always been that way, just never with you. Wickedly, you took the bucket that floated beside you and dunked it in the water. With a mischievous grin, you snuck up behind him, dumping the bucket of water on his head. 
James turned around with a gasp, jaw dropped. You laughed, a wide smile on your lips at the sight of him drenched in his swim trunks. It wasn’t until his arms tucked along your waist, dragging you to the deeper ends of the pond did the smile drop and his return. 
“Why you little…” you seethed. “James Fleamont Potter if you-” 
It was too late by then, your body submerged in the water and you swam up, his laughter the first noticeable sound. You scowled as he doubled over with laughter on the shore. “I’m never letting you go to Quidditch camp again.” 
The two of you walked home as the sun set, many flicks to the forehead ensuing as you did. 
---
Fifth year was by far the most epic year of your Hogwarts experience. Everything was prepared for the Animagi transformation and phase two of the map project was ready to launch with Remus having gained access to the restricted section of the library. 
It seemed as though the whole student body had recognized the change in James’s physique which only led to an inflation of his ego. The worst part was that Lily Evans just so happened to be one of those said noticers and while her defiance toward him was still strong, she could be caught staring in class much to James’s delight. 
The Animagi process began as soon as the September full moon. While Remus suffered in the Shrieking Shack, the four other Marauders set their Mandrake leaves into their mouths preparing for an uncomfortable month of bitterness on their tongues. The leaves were held under their tongues when talking in class and for the rest of the time they resorted to note passing leaving the entirety of Hogwarts wondering why the Marauders went quiet so suddenly. 
During the period between moons, they worked on their map. Stacks of books, both regular and restricted, lay among them. Each had a quill and parchment used to take note of spells or pass messages back and forth. As you worked you received a message from James in the form of a crumpled ball of parchment. You smoothed it out with a sigh. 
I hate this thing. It tastes like piss and lime. 
You held back a chuckle, writing your own message next to his. 
You’re not backing out of this, Potter. It’s for Remus. 
He stuck the leaf under his tongue in order to stick it out at you and you rolled your eyes. He scribbled a message back. 
I know. I know. Doesn’t mean I can’t complain about it. 
You smirked, tossing the parchment back to him. 
If your scrawny arse can come back from Quidditch camp with abs then you can stomach keeping a leaf in your mouth for a month. 
He smoothed it out and you went back to your work only getting in a minute's reading before the parchment bounced off your head. You scowled at his antics but he only looked at his book with a smirk. Unfolding the paper, James’s messy handwriting took up the last blank space on the parchment. 
Nice to know you still think about my abs. 
Your stomach squirmed at the feeling that inflamed from his words and the smirk that was on his face. You flicked him on the head, throwing the parchment into the fire before Sirius could ask what it was. 
--- 
It took moon soaked leaves, untouched morning dew and a lightning storm to finally complete the transformations. It was on a late November night that a lightning storm finally struck and in the fifth corridor bathroom the Marauders made their first transformations. For Peter, a small rat with a wriggling tail. For Sirius, a pure black dog. For James, a large stag with mighty horns. For you, a sly fox with sleek orange fur. 
Thus that night began the use of the nicknames: Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, Prongs and Vixen. Dubbed by James and agreed upon all around. The final full moons of fifth year were spent prancing around Hogsmeade alongside Remus whose scars diminished with each transformation spent with his friends. 
The downside of it all was the building tension in the school. With Lord Voldemort on the rise, more and more of your classmates were showing their true colors. Select Slytherins no longer wore short sleeves, their wrists always covered even in the heat of summer. Watchful eyes and protective glares, you went home for summer in worry. 
Over the summer, Prongs lost his Pronginess. He wrote to Lily Evans most days of the week and now the things she sent him hung on his wall alongside you and the Marauders. An anticipated change but a scary one still. Every outing with James became more about Lily and less about anything else. You could feel your best friend slipping away and you told him so the night before the start of sixth year. 
The two of you sat together in the branches of a tree. The sun hit your skin in rays and clouds passed by over your heads. James’s voice droned on about his darling Lily flower and with an unknowing malice you snapped at him. “Shut it!” you groaned. 
His eyes looked over at you, hands holding your head in remorse. “Aren’t you happy for me? You’ve been acting off all summer.” 
“I’ve been acting off because you’ve been acting off. I am happy for you but Evans is the only thing you talk about these days. What happened to talking about the Tornados or sneaking out together for milkshakes?” 
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “It’s different now.” 
“Well, it shouldn’t be.” you exclaim. “I’m not saying you shouldn’t grow up. I support the idea of you no longer being a cheeky bastard. If you’re happy with Evans then I am happy for you. But being with Evans doesn’t mean you have to forget about me or the Marauders or everything else.” 
James nodded, a leaf spinning between his fingers as he frowned. “I’m sorry, Y/N/N.” 
You shake your head. “I am too. Sorry I snapped at you, my boy.” your head fell onto his shoulder the same way it had done for years only this time things had changed. The weight still felt perfect on his shoulder but now his stomach turned and his breath hitched at the close proximity. Things were indeed changing although the two of you only danced around it, not wanting to address the mess you two had made. 
Your head was still against his shoulder as you spoke quietly. “Just remember you’re not a Quaffle.” 
He chuckled, stroking your hair affectionately. “I guess I’ll be the snitch then.” 
You smiled, swimming in the feel of the James Potter you knew so well. Later that night, the two of you snuck out like old times, sharing a chocolate milkshake and sending each other glances the whole way home. 
--- 
Sixth year was a rollercoaster. The map was finished, all the efforts poured out finally receiving an equally impressive outcome with the parchment branded with the names of the Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, Prongs and Vixen. Remus had his first kiss and Sirius decided on leaving home and James welcomed him with open arms. 
The other Marauders were not impartial to the changes in your and James’s behavior. The miniscule changes in his face when you napped on his lap or the flush of your skin when he rustled your hair. In all honesty, it was as though the two of you were finally waking up and seeing what they’d been seeing all along. However, your own defiance was strong and love wasn’t simple. James was still under the impression that his heart beat for Lily Evans and you flirted around your feelings as opposed to finally confronting them. 
When Gryffindor won the Quidditch season, you were the first one in James’s arms to congratulate him. He spun you around, a large grin on his face. “We won!” 
You smiled. “That you did, my boy. Celebration calls and are you thinking what I’m thinking?” 
He tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear. “Hmm? Let me guess… Firewhiskey?” 
“That’s my boy.” you cheer, linking your arm in his and dragging him off the field as Lily Evans watched the boy she had taken a chance on run off with someone else.
---
Firewhiskey made for a fine celebration and resulted in James and you collapsed on the floor of the Gryffindor common room at two in the morning. His glasses were crooked as he stared up at the ceiling and your hair fell in waves on the floorboards. 
“Blimey, I can’t believe we won.” James chuckled, his words slurring together slightly. 
“You deserve it, my boy.” you say, lightly punching his arm. “How are you feeling on this fine evening?” 
His cheeks went pink but a smile overtook his features making for a hilarious expression when he shouted out. “Randy!”  
You doubled over with laughter. “Gosh, James. I don’t need to hear about this.” you shove his grinning face with your palm. 
“What, you've never felt randy before?” he asked, a childlike expression on his face juxtaposing such an intrusive question. 
You hide your embarrassment behind a grin. “Yes, but I’m not going around telling you about it.” 
He tapped your nose with the tip of his finger and your stomach swirled. “And why not?” 
You turned over to your side. “I’m not sure best friends tell each other about being randy, Prongs.” 
James sighed. “I guess not. But how are you feeling, my little vixen?” 
With a swig of your drink and a grin you reply. “Randy.” 
The two of you erupt into fits of laughter. James pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “I suppose it’s the whiskey then.” 
You stare up at the ceiling. “Yeah, I suppose so.” 
Both of you knew that wasn’t the case. You knew that despite the whiskey slowing the gears of your mind you still noticed James’s hand laying by your waist. You could still trace the outline of his chin and the bridge of his nose. James could still see the curve of your lips and the rise of your chest. Firewhiskey was most definitely not the cause of your randiness. 
But it was the easiest thing to blame. 
--- 
Your birthday came soon after with the Marauders celebrating in joy. Presents were exchanged with Remus giving you some books, Peter knitted (with the help of his mother) a pair of mittens for you and Sirius had gifted you a record to play on your stereo. 
But James had to be extravagant. It wasn’t everyday his best friend turned seventeen and he marked the occasion with something expensive yet meaningful. When you opened the small box inside had been a silver fox ring. It’s eyes sparkling gems that twinkled as if blinking. 
“James, I’m going to kill you.” you seethed. “This is way too expensive. I’m turning seventeen not fifty.” 
He laughed. “Oi, woman! It’s fine. Nothing I couldn’t handle. Besides, only the best for you.” 
You stared at it once more before engulfing him in a hug. “It’s beautiful, my boy. Thank you.” 
His arms squeezed your waist, breathing you in and remembering the sweet smells of childhood and friendship rolled into one. His eyes closed and it was as if he had drifted off into a pleasant dream. “Of course, my little vixen.”
You made certain to flick his head after. 
He was starting to regret giving it to you already. 
---
Sixth year came to a close with an even more devastating end than the last. The war only continued to rage with Muggles being murdered miles away from the school, Muggle-borns driving into hiding. Sirius’s brother was slowly falling into line with the other Slytherins, devoting their hours to the torture of Muggleborns, Lord Voldemort and the likes. 
James left Hogwarts heart-broken when Lily Evans broke up with him on the last day of term. “Look around!” Lily had told him. “You’re blind, James. I’m not the person you want and it’d be clear if you’d stop and take a look.” 
He hadn’t known what she meant and the first week of summer was spent crying and eating ice cream on the sofa with you by his side. His room had become a mess and Lily’s letters no longer remained on the wall instead crumbled up in a ball in the trash. 
Euphemia Potter couldn’t dread to see her son in the dumps any longer and she made sure to tell him so one evening after you had left. 
“James, you need to get your life together, my love.” she whispered, rubbing her sons back reassuringly. 
His words came out muffled into her neck. “It’s hard.” 
“I know.” she soothed. “And I’m always going to be there for you.” 
“Promise?” he asked. 
“Promise.” she smiled. “Now how about you go clean your room. It’s become quite dirty.” 
He nodded, trudging to his room with a broom. Lily’s words repeated in his mind as he entered. “You’re blind, James. Look around!” But there was nothing to look for. All he saw was his wall and a soft smile came to his face as he approached it. The Tutshill Tornado banners clung loosely to the paint and drawings of Kneazles and landscapes and trees. Pictures of the Marauders and Gryffindor lions. 
And finally the ones of you. 
His fingers ran across the picture in the middle. Four-year old James grinning and you licking a lolly. His eyes moved to the next one, seven years old and flying together on a broomstick. A grin broke out on his face as he saw the one with your owl in Diagon Alley, his fingers flicking your forehead. James’s mind was on hyperdrive as he examined each picture, one common factor in almost all of them. 
You. 
You were in many of the photos, a smile adorned on your face. If you weren’t in the photos you were the one taking them, knowing how much he adored them. Any pictures that hung were sketched by your hands. Here was James Potter’s open story, the story of his life all plastered to the wall as though it was an empty canvas. Present in every moment, every aspect, had been you. You had been the start of his book, the picture of the two of you as tots still smacked in the middle of the wall. Yes, he realized. You had started his book and had remained in it for quite some time. 
Lily Evans must’ve noticed and maybe everyone else had too. 
James had been blind to the message that was sprawled across his wall. He had been the one writing it, maybe not knowingly but writing it out all the same. Everyone had seen it except the writer and his subject, the message painstakingly clear years prior to its conception. 
He quickly removed all the pictures from the wall, grabbing each one that hung and piling them up in his hand. The door swung open as he dashed out of his room yelling, “I’ve got to go, mum!” before running out the front door. The hills of green were illuminated by the night sky, the stars burned for James as he hopped over branches and boulders to get to you. 
Your house was in the distance, your figure standing a few feet away from the home. He called out to you, your eyes turned to meet his. When he reached you, he paused, catching his breath. 
“James, what on Earth are you doing here?” you laugh, placing a hand on his shoulder as he breathed. 
He stood up straight, panting as he held up a photo. “This is us when we were four. The first photo we ever took together.” 
You squinted at him. “Right?” 
He shuffled through the pictures, fingers tracing each one. “And this is from when we were seven. That one from when we were ten. You gave me this drawing when we were six because you loved Kneazles and wanted one as a pet. That drawing was from the first year when we went skipping stones at the Black Lake and you sketched me and Peter.” 
Your face melts slowly. “James, I don’t understand. You’ve had these for years.” 
He exhaled, his eyes lighting up. “That’s the thing. I never saw it till now but Lily said I was blind and that she wasn’t the person I wanted.” You nod, wiping the sweat from his forehead with your sleeve and he grinned. “See that right there. That’s what I want.” 
The night air bit at your spine. “You want me to wipe the sweat from your forehead?” 
He shook his head with a soft chuckle. “Not exactly. I want you to wipe the sweat from my forehead for the next year and the next ten and then the next fifty. You’ve been doing it for years already and the thing is… I don’t think I want anyone else doing it for me.” 
You blinked as he came closer, his palms cradling your cheek as you gazed into his eyes. “You’ve been in my life for as long as I could remember and I want you to stay in it for as long as I live. You told me once to not throw around the l-word and I said…” 
“But I’ve known you my whole life.” you mutter. 
“I think I’ve loved you for a while. I just didn’t know it yet.” 
You shook your head as the wind rustled the branches, the windchime on your porch creating soft melodies. A large grin spread across your lips yet you continued to shake your head. “There’s a war, James.” 
He smiled. “Only more the reason to be with me.” 
“But I’ve been with you my whole life.” you tease. 
“Oh, shut up!” he chuckles, before leaning down to capture your lips. At that moment everything made sense. All the pieces of the puzzle sifted into place and the stars applauded you from the sky and the night gale created a ruckus at your shed blindfold. 
“Be my Snitch?” he asked. 
You rolled your eyes, “That’s the cringiest thing you’ve ever said, my boy.” 
He smirked. “Oh, but you love it.” 
“Perhaps I do.” you replied, flicking his forehead for good measure. 
---
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willowbleedsonpaper · 3 years
Text
Winter In The Shade XIV
Part XIV
Sirius Black x Ravenclaw Reader
W.C. : 2866
Requested by @pogueslandia : It is Sirius’ fifth year at Hogwarts, the same year he ran away from home and to the Potter’s. Soon, he discovers the unfamiliar sight of his brother Regulus smiling and looking truly happy, next to him a Ravenclaw girl who immediately captures his interest. What will happen when the Black family gets involved in their sons lives and the ones they hold close to their hearts?
Warnings: None (Let me know if there's any, though)
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Masterlist | Series Masterlist
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You were distracted. Regulus had noticed that much. Two weeks had passed by since his game against Gryffindor and he had taken to himself to watch you closely. At first he was worried, now he was curious. He could feel you were distant, sometimes he would find your eyes lost in the crowd of students or a smile growing on your lips at something only you could figure out from all the voices. You spent more time out after dinner, Regulus finding you walking back to your common room late at night when you had supposedly already gone there. He didn’t question you but he wanted to know who this person was who had captured your attention.
Unfortunately, he was certain it had to be a Gryffindor. The presence of the house is always there whenever he notices these changes in your behaviour. He had so many questions and no reason to ask you about it. But he knew he could dig a little with the right words.
“...and I need this one and that one.” you said, walking through the shelves of the library with Regulus following you “Can you reach the red one for me?” you asked him, his arm easily going over your head and taking the book you pointed “Thank you.” you told him, adding the book to the pile in your arms.
Regulus just observed you, noticing a sweet smell coming from you. Your favorite perfume. You looked the same as always, Ravenclaw uniform neatly worn with a few details of your own design, leather bag hanging from your left shoulder as your body inevitably leaned towards that side due to the weight of all you carried. Your face, your hair, your voice it was all the same but it was all in the details. The perfume, the skip on your step, your more cheerful mood.
“You seem happier.” he said, earning a chuckle from you as you returned the book in your hand to the shelf.
“Thank you?” you answered doubtfully. There, no retort to fight him, no sarcastic comment to notice his own gloomy or serious mood.
“I mean it.” he told you, trying to look casual about it. He didn’t have it in him but he had to try, he’s used to being direct but going around things was not his thing. “What’s gotten you in such a happy mood lately?”
You made a face at him, leading him towards your table at the library. He took the seat right across from you, facing the entrance of the library as he had always liked to observe the people going in and out of the room. You moved your own chair out and took a seat, dropping the pile of books on the tables’ surface.
“Would you believe it's because of you?” you asked with a smile, taking your things out of your bag and placing one by one on the table.
Regulus shook his head, following your movements as he did the same “The fact that you asked me if I would believe you tells me it’s not because of me.” he stated, resting his back against the chair as he watched you. “And there is a reason because you are making up excuses.”
You frowned, hitting the table a little too hard with the spine of your book “I hate that you’re so clever sometimes.” you muttered bitterly, unknown to Regulus that you were starting to panic. Your leg a jumping mess under the table.
“Why won’t you tell me?” he asked. Going around things wasn’t working for him, it actually never worked for anyone but he knew that and trying it anyway got on his nerves a little too much. He needed answers.
“Because there is nothing to tell.” you said, voice high as you avoided his gaze. You were lying.
“Look at me.” he said.
You closed your eyes shut, letting out a single breath as you pressed your lips in a line. Finally you lifted your face, meeting his eyes. He had a relaxed posture, as relaxed as Regulus could get, but he still tilted his head. Oh, he knew what he was doing. He looked approachable and kind, more than usual in your eyes.
“You’re seeing someone.”
Your heart almost jumped out of your chest, the drop of your stomach as you felt like someone had punched you on the gut enough to make all the happiness he was asking you about wash out of your face.
He wasn’t asking. It wasn’t a question. He was telling you because he knew.
Your thoughts started to go over everything you had done, everything you had said, how you acted, anything that could have given it away to him. Everything and nothing came to mind as you just stared at him, your body completely still.
Then it dawned on you that you weren’t seeing anyone. Not really. You and Sirius were friends who liked to spend time together. Behind your best friend and Sirius brother’s back. You thought bitterly, guilt starting to rise inside you. We’re just friends. Then why did your mind go immediately to Sirius at the question of you seeing anyone?
“What?” you asked in a whisper, taking a shaky breath after as the fear of your secret being discovered became more real.
He looked for your eyes, a small smile on his face “I know you’re seeing someone.”
“You know?” you repeated.
“Yes.”
But did he knew?
“And you’re not upset?” you asked, taking careful steps in the conversation.
“I don’t know why you felt like you couldn’t tell me.” he said “I’m more upset over the fact that they’re a Gryffindor, but I guess I’ll get…”
“You know!” you yelled. The shushing sounds from the students around you made you shrink in your place as you muttered a quiet apology, the flush in your cheeks nothing as you turned with wide eyes at Regulus, mouthing the words You Know.
“I had my suspicions.” he said, looking around before he settled back on you “You stare at the people of their house a lot and I still have to figure out who they are…”
His words were muffled by the relief washing over you. He didn’t know.
*******
Sirius had looked for you a couple of days after the Quidditch game. He had managed a couple of minutes away from all the eyes at Hogwarts to ask you to meet him later that day. Of course you had agreed.
You moved through the castle with light steps. It was late but not enough to get you in trouble, just to get a warning look from the professors. Sirius had asked you to meet him inside the castle but you couldn’t risk another surprise visit from Regulus, his extra classes had gotten all over his schedule and you no longer knew when he would be out and what days he wouldn’t. So you asked Sirius to meet you at the castle entrance. Doubtful, he had accepted.
So that’s where you were headed, playing with your fingers as you moved. The corridors were empty and the day getting colder, a chill running down your spine as more nerves got to you. Somehow, although you wanted this, you were also dreading it.
The doors were wide open, your figure a dot in the distance of what the entire castle represented. You glanced at either side of the door before you decided Sirius wasn’t there yet. You rested your weight on the wall outside the castle, closing your eyes as the air blew on your face. You found the feeling relaxing and refreshing, almost taking your worries with it.
Then something changed in the air, a different smell caught in the air as you started to feel different. Not alone. Your eyes fluttered open to see Sirius standing right beside you, a different look on his face as he watched you.
“You looked peaceful.” he said, offering his hand for you to take.
You glanced hesitantly at him, grabbing his hand “You look different.”
“And we’ve never looked better.” he said, his usual grin back on his lips as he gave a soft squeeze to your hand “Lead the way, since a castle is not enough for the lady.”
You rolled your eyes, shaking your head as you pulled him with you, missing his triumphant smile at teasing you.
You walked for a couple of minutes, going down the stairs to the black lake in silence. Once you got over the hills and past the shore of the black lake Sirius started asking questions but you didn’t give in, ignoring his every word until you got closer to your destiny, your secret space.
“Would you relax?” you asked him, his mouth never stopping until you talked “We’re almost there.”
“You could have told me where we are going.” he said, looking around you and seeing nothing familiar “You could be leading me to my death.”
“Oh, yes.” you smiled back at him before narrowing your eyes at him “I’m not really a student at Hogwarts. You see, I’m this serial killer who lures her victims by being a sweet girl, this is the place where all my victims have died and you are next.”
Your grasp on his hand got tighter, smiling at him before you focused on the way you were walking. Sirius raised an eyebrow but said nothing, letting you drag him with his arm now stretched to create space between you two.
“I can’t tell if you’re joking.” he said, his voice a little worried “You sound very convincing and your scenario sounds entirely possible now.”
You laughed out loud, throwing your head back lightly. Sirius' fake worry all washed away as a genuine smile replaced everything in his features, thinking that maybe, if you were actually a serial killer, this wouldn’t be such an awful way to die.
“I’m very capable of a lot of things, so you shouldn’t underestimate me.” you said, raising your eyebrows at him before you turn back front “We’re here.” you announced, letting go of his hand as you advanced some steps on your own.
You moved through the grass, grass tall enough to reach your ankles and wildflowers who filled the ground with beautiful dots of color. And to your right an enormous tree, vines hanging from its branches that you moved as if it was a curtain, letting you and Sirius through to a small meadow. The place was comfortable enough to have a picnic with a few friends and still have room to move around, the makeshift walls made of more trees and vines that covered the space to make the shape of what almost resembled a circle.
“Welcome to a small haven just outside Hogwarts.” you said to Sirius, spinning once in your spot as you focused back on his face. He looked amazed, his eyes finding the sky once before he moved to the green grass and small patches of flowers.
“Just outside is putting it lightly.” he whispered, but you could see he didn’t care about the distance or about walking all the way there with you. He softly ran his fingers over the vines that fell like heavy silks once again, covering the spot where you two had walked in. “You found this place?”
You hummed in response, nodding your head “I was trying to escape some friends while we played. It was my first year so I didn’t know the grounds of the school very well. I ran and ran until I could no longer hear them and then I hid here. They never found me.”
He laughed, his smile reaching his eyes as he continued to look around “You probably shouldn’t have shown me this place.” he told you, knowing perfectly that he would use it as a way to avoid professors and detention.
“I didn’t show you anything.” you said, patting a spot in the ground to then sit there with a huff “You followed me here.”
Sirius did the same thing and sat down next to you “You dragged me here.” he stated, giving you a knowing look.
“You offered your hand.” you argued back, throwing some of your hair over your shoulder “You could have let go at any time.” Your confidence didn’t last much as you burst out laughing, shaking your head as you tried to speak, the words coming out of your mouth unintelligible.
It took you a couple of minutes to catch your breath but in the end your chest started to rise and fall evenly, the air calm as you could only hear the breeze moving the tree tops. The silence fell heavily between you two, not in an uncomfortable way but enough to let you know the laughter was over.
You swallowed in anticipation, not knowing how to begin. In the end you didn’t have to, Sirius taking the chance first.
“I’m sure you have many questions and believe me, so do I,” he started, looking at his hands as he spoke “But you have to know whatever he is doing it’s not good.”
“You don’t know that.” you said in a low tone, still a hint of hope in your voice.
He shook his head, turning to look at you with that same desperation he had in his eyes the day you found Regulus. “You’re too good.” he whispered, raising his hand hesitantly to your face, his finger moving a piece of hair behind your ear.
His skin felt warm against yours, the back of his hand grazing your cheek as you moved your face away “I’m not naive.” you exclaimed “I know him. He is my friend, my family, he would never say that.”
“We both heard him, Y/N.” Sirius reminded you, his voice sounding deeper now “How can you explain what we both heard?” he asked, looking at you expectantly.
“I don’t know what I heard.” you said stubbornly, refusing to look at Sirius.
“You do know. I saw you there and you were hurt, we both know what he called you.”
You grunted, pushing yourself to your feet as you stood with your back at him “There must be an explanation.”
Sirius followed you, standing just behind you “For calling someone Pure enough…”
“Dont’!” you hissed, turning to Sirius with a glare in your face.
“I think it’s self explanatory, Y/N.” his voice had raised in volume, the two of you facing one another with glares in your eyes, not moving but holding each others’ eyes.
“Then why is he still my friend?” you asked in a whisper, faces inches away from one another, he heard you just right. “Why is he still by my side, why has nothing changed?”
“Because you’re everything he has left.” he whispered angrily, not being able to hold your gaze any longer as he turned from you. “I was once in your place. Then, he could afford to lose me, so he did. He had the chance to change, to prove everyone wrong but he chose status and the glory of being the only son of the Black family.”
“What are you talking about?” you asked him, confusion growing inside of you as you digested his words.
“Why do you think I left my home?” he asked quietly, “Why do you think my family and your best friend hate me so much? A shame to the Black family.”
A frown was set deep in your face, eyes wild as you started to put all the pieces together inside your head. The perfect son who hates his traitor brother. Traitor. Blood traitor.
Your gaze stilled for a moment, your eyes on the ground as you breathed in deeply. You raised your face slowly, eyes meeting Sirius’ as you stood straight. You opened your mouth but nothing came out, the small gap letting out air as you tried to even your breathing. Your entire face fell, sadness overtaking your eyes as you finally understood.
“You don’t believe in blood purity.” you whispered, voice rough as all the emotion you held inside tried to pour itself on your words. “But he does.”
“Yes.” A simple word, a full sentence. One that changed everything now that the truth was out.
Words got tangled on your tongue, you tried to speak but felt like all it would come out would be your screams.
Your body moved back on its own, rubbing the side of your arm with your hand as every word repeated itself in your head.
“He stayed?” you asked him.
Still that hint of hope. Sirius thought.
“He didn’t ask to come.” he said truthfully.
You nodded your head continuously, not stopping until you covered your face with the palms of your hands, pressing the cold feeling against your skin.
Seconds after you felt a pair of arms around your shoulders, his whispered words on the side of your head filled you with comfort as you moved your hands around his chest.
He held you for a long time, I could have been minutes or hours, it felt like a lifetime. Despite everything you had just learned, there, you felt safe.
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helnjk · 3 years
Text
In a Crowd of Thousands - Part 2 // F.W.
Fred Weasley x fem!reader
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Word Count: 3.1k
Summary: You never really forget your childhood love. For Princess Y/N of Diagon, hers came in the form of a boy whose dream it was to start a business and support his family. As it goes, life–and her duty to her kingdom–had gotten in the way. She longed to see him again, to see the success she was sure he had achieved. Luckily, fate was on her side.
Warnings: food mention, alcohol mention (champagne, blink and you’ll miss it), gambling mention (it’s a small bet, blink and you’ll miss it again)
A/N: okay but im lowkey proud of this part. this is the last official ‘chapter’ of this mini series, and i’m really excited to share it with y’all hihi xx 
(also also, there’s a bonus part at the end that you don’t have to read but i love it lol)
flashbacks are in italics
Prologue | Part 1
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The grand ballroom of the palace was packed with people. 
Princess Y/N of Diagon sighed internally as her eyes swept over its expanse. At 21 years old, she was mere months away from her coronation. And, as tradition dictated, a ball was being held in her honor and she avoided it until the last minute that she could. 
To be quite honest, she thought that the idea of a ‘presentation’ was completely outdated and there was absolutely no need for it. She was more than familiar with her people and she didn’t need this night of frivolity and grandiosity to prove it. 
When Minerva first brought up the idea of having to fake a smile and discuss politics in a stuffy room with a bunch of aristocrats, Y/N immediately rolled her eyes. She knew that it was tradition for her to be ‘presented’ to her kingdom, but she also knew that those invited to the ball would not be able to speak for the majority of her subjects. They would be nobles, far too uptight and far too removed from the masses to know what they would truly need. 
They were exactly the kind of people the princess tried very hard to avoid when she went on her rounds throughout the towns and met with people of all walks of life. 
The Princess was very dedicated to living out her goal of being a fair and just leader. From the moment she turned 16, she made it a point to immerse herself in the lives of those who relied on her for, well, everything. Though, much of the fire under her had to do with the initials etched into the trunk of a tree that stood tall and proud by the banks of the river. 
Her reaction to the news of the ball, however, wasn’t appreciated by her governess. Not that she needed a governess anymore, but Y/N would always be grateful for the strong and steady presence that Minerva had been her whole life. 
“Oh don’t look at me like that,” she defended, crossing her arms over her chest, “Even you know how useless these kinds of things are.” 
Minerva merely shook her head and tried to look stern, “Yes, well, it is tradition, at least try and enjoy yourself. You are not expected to speak with investors and nobles all night, and there will be many opportunities to eat and to dance!” 
“As long as my corset isn’t too tight, I think I can manage an evening with the snooty elite.” 
“My dear I hope you know that you are a part of the snooty elite.” 
True to her word, Y/N managed to get through several conversations without any sarcastic remarks or backhanded compliments. In fact, she found herself enjoying the party much more than she had anticipated. The music was lovely, the food phenomenal, and she daresay her dress was absolutely stunning. 
She was fetching herself a drink when a familiar voice spoke next to her, “Well don’t you clean up nicely, sweetheart.” 
“Lord Black!” the princess exclaimed, turning to him and letting out one of the few genuine smiles of the night. “I wasn’t aware you were going to be attending the ball! If I did, I would’ve stuck by your side the moment I entered.” 
The older man’s eyes crinkled at the compliment and he leant in for a warm hug. 
Sirius Black was one of the only aristocrats that the Princess actually held a fondness for. The moment the pair met at one of the first few meetings the King and Queen had allowed her to attend, Y/N knew that he was of the right sort. 
He came from very very old money, but once his parents had passed and he was given access to the Black fortune and title, he began to make very good changes wherever he could. He was a silent investor in many business ventures, and more often than not, the businesses he chose to support would end up flourishing.
“Anything new and exciting to tell me about?” Y/N asked, taking a sip of her sickly sweet champagne. 
Sirius’ eyes lit up at the question, “I met a very promising pair of brothers–twins, actually. Their minds are as sharp as a knife, and they’ve got the most absurd ideas! Brilliant, but absurd. I think they can make it work.” 
“I’m excited to hear more about them, then.” 
The pair spent a good amount of time chatting away, seeking refuge at one of the emptier tables and settling. This was a great compromise for the Princess, who was hitting two birds with one stone as she spoke to someone she enjoyed the company of as well as someone who was a part of the ‘snooty elite’. 
He spoke about his godson and how he was learning to walk and absolutely terrorizing his parents. In return, she told him about how the coronation planning was driving her up the wall. It felt good to be this open and genuine with someone, especially at a function like the one they were attending. 
Sirius was in the middle of an exciting anecdote about Harry’s adventures with his mother’s makeup when Y/N caught a glimpse of fiery red hair. 
Her heart stopped and leaped simultaneously in her chest.
As if they were being pulled by a magnet, her eyes focused solely on the familiar silhouette weaving in and out of the crowd. Her tunnel vision allowed her to see him and only him, and her mind began to go on overdrive. 
“Princess?” 
She barely registered the older man calling out to her, too distracted by the thought of seeing him again. Of being in the same place as him again. Of finally speaking the words she held in her heart for years to him. 
“Excuse me for a moment,” was all she managed to get out. 
Y/N could hear her blood rushing to her ears as she pushed through the, frankly too many, people in the way of her and her best friend. She didn’t care if she wasn’t behaving in a way that a Queen-to-be should be behaving, she didn’t care about any niceties at the moment. The last few years for her were spent almost completely alone, without her favorite redhead by her side, and she would be damned if she was going to let this opportunity slip through her fingers. 
If she was being honest, time hadn’t done much to settle the grief she felt over the Weasleys moving away. Every little thing had reminded her of Fred and she was ashamed to admit that she wasn’t as open to new relationships–or friendships–because of the lingering feelings she harbored for the twin. 
But now, now she had the chance to finally speak to him after so long. To feel the familiar comfort of his presence, to be herself and not have to worry about being the perfect royal that she was expected to be. 
Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. 
Y/N could see Fred, he was right there, only a few steps away with his back turned to her. He was laughing at something the person he was speaking to had said, his whole body shaking with unabashed glee. Someone in front of him called out her name as they saw her approach and she watched as he froze for a fraction of a second before turning on his heel. 
Their eyes met and she paused mid-step. 
The world was coated in molasses now, everything around her moving haltingly slow as they saw each other for the first time in years. All other things in the room melted away as he stepped forward, and suddenly he was standing right in front of her. 
“Hi,” she breathed.
“Hi,” he replied, charmile smile and all, “I told you we’d find each other again, didn’t I?” 
Y/N let out a small laugh, still in shock that Fred was really in front of her. His arms wrapped around her torso in a tentative hug, and she spared no time clinging on to him with a ferocity that surprised even her. It was almost as if she was trying to convince herself he was really and truly there. Luckily for the princess, he had no qualms with how tightly she was gripping onto him. 
When she finally eased her hold, he held out his arm. “Care for a dance, Princess?”
“I’d love to.” 
All eyes were on them as they walked onto the dance floor, clearly not just another pair among the others. Still, Y/N only had eyes for the man in front of her. Her eyes scanned over his features, taking note of the things that changed and the things that didn’t. 
Fred was still her Fred, just older now, more confident. He had an air around him that wasn’t there the last time she saw him. It was a pleasant surprise, though, seeing him so sure of himself as he spun her around. 
Music flowed around them as Y/N was dipped and twirled. She had never felt more like royalty than she had in that moment, dancing with Fred Weasley, her hand in his. Everything around them seemed to melt away as they moved through the dance floor, eyes locked and bodies pressed together. 
Even when the music paused and they left the dancefloor, their hands remained intertwined. 
Slowly, those in attendance began to make their leave. Some passed by the Princess to say their goodbyes and politely thank her for the night, but most knew better than to interrupt her time with someone who was clearly quite important to her. 
Y/N had never been more thankful for the night to be ending. 
“Didn’t know you were so popular, Y/N” Fred teased after another nobleman bid her goodnight.
“I am a Princess after all,” she replied, watching the man leave. 
“And a damn good one, I’ve heard.” 
She turned to look at him, “Been asking around about me, have you?” 
The look he gave her nearly made her swoon. It was full of affection and admiration, taking the princess off guard. 
Instead of answering, he merely cocked his head in the direction of the exit, saying “Fancy a walk through the grounds? I hear it’s been decorated quite beautifully for the night.” 
After spending so much time packed in a crowded room, it was a welcome relief to be in the cool evening air. True to Fred’s word, the gardens looked spectacular. Lights glittered through every little nook and cranny, the soft trickling of water from the fountains filling the air. It felt like something from a fairytale. 
The pair of them walked together in a peaceful silence, sneaking glances at each other every once in a while. It wasn’t until they found themselves in front of the old weeping willow that they paused. 
“Remember this place?” Fred chuckled, his eyes scanning over the draping branches covered in glittering lights. 
“How could I forget?” 
For the first time that night since they had seen each other, Y/N let go of Fred’s hand. She gently moved aside the curtain of leaves in front of them and stepped into their childhood sanctuary. Fred had to take a moment just to take in the sight of her, a vision in the midst of a sea of stars. 
His heart stuttered in his chest. 
“Do you remember what we promised each other here?” he asked again, eyes shifting to the trunk behind her. 
“It’s on my mind more often than not,” she admitted, feeling heat creep up her neck. 
If he noticed how flustered she got, he didn’t comment. Instead, he said, “Me too.” 
Y/N was right in front of the trunk now, running her fingers over the indented wood. Nimble digits pausing when they brushed over their initials. Fred couldn’t see her expression, but he could tell that there were many things running through her mind at that moment. 
“I think I’ve held up my end of the bargain,” his voice filled the quiet air, “George and I have a rather successful shop in town, if I do say so myself.”  
The Princess turned around to face him with a smile, her back to the tree, “I think I’m on my way to fulfilling mine.” 
As they spoke, their bodies slowly inched towards each other, magnets unable to stay away. The air around them was charged, pushing the two together bit by bit. Soon, they were toe to toe, breaths mingling and eyes locking. 
“I think,” Fred whispered, “I think I’m going to fulfill another dream of mine tonight.” 
Time froze as his face dipped close enough for their lips to brush. Y/N let out a soft gasp as he drew close, body abuzz with nervous energy and skin alight with every touch. Fred was there to ease her mind, though, with warm hands at the small of her back and soft lips gently pressing against hers. 
She felt herself melting into his arms, melting into the kiss as if it was what she was born to do. Nothing else seemed to matter at that moment. 
Like waves finding their way back to the shore, crashing into each other the way only the ocean could, somehow Y/N always knew that Fred would always find his way back to her. The mere thought of it brought a smile to her face and she laughed as he kissed into her smile. Once, twice, three times.  
“You are my dream,” Fred whispered once they broke apart, both of them sharing the same dopey grins. 
“And you are mine,” she replied, pressing her palm to his heart. 
The clock tower had already struck midnight when Princess Y/N and Fred decided to make their way back to the castle. The night was far too short for their liking, but it comforted them to know that they had the next day (and the next and the next, and so on) for them to spend with each other. 
Their pace remained leisurely as they walked through the familiar place. The castle seemed brand new to the princess now. It was coated in a new light as she looked at it with fresh eyes and a happy heart. She came to the realization that the years spent apart from Fred were far too silent and still without him. Now that she had him by her side, the halls seemed to be filled with happiness and light.
The laughter echoing through the halls and the adrenaline pumping through her as they tried to remain unseen was a welcome feeling. It was familiar, almost intimate in a way. She was thrown back to when they were little and Fred had started teaching her about all the different secrets and passageways the castle had to offer. 
“This way, Princess!” a young boy’s voice whisper-yelled to Y/N’s right. 
She spun towards the direction of the sound to see Fred pulling aside a large tapestry. Behind it was a hallway she had never seen before. Her eyes widened at the sight, but she did not hesitate to duck into it. 
“How did you ever find this place?” she asked, eyes scanning the narrow but comfortable passageway, “And where does it lead to?” 
“I spend a lot of time running away from mother,” Fred shrugged. That earned him a laugh from the princess and he let himself feel smug. “This is a shorter way back up to your room, if you’re ever in a hurry.” 
Now, instead of shortcuts and easy ways to get from one place to the other, the pair found themselves taking their time. Fred would tug on her hand and bring them into an empty alcove, stealing kisses and sharing soft smiles. His body was warm, a comforting presence beside hers, and Y/N found herself leaning against his side more often than not.
By the time they found themselves outside the Princess’ chamber doors, they were giggling like little children, running away from governesses and mothers. 
Y/N’s back was pressed against the door suddenly as Fred’s body enveloped hers in a searing kiss. Her heart beat erratically in her chest as her hands found themselves clutching at his coat. 
Then, as quick as he had come, Fred pulled away with a smirk, “Until we see each other next, Princess?” 
She scoffed, “If you think I don’t have the resources to track you down and kill you for saying that, you’re wrong.”
“I’m only joking,” he grinned and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her to him once again, “We always find our way back to each other, don’t we?” 
The princess rolled her eyes, but he could see the edges of her lips trying–and failing–not to quirk up. 
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BONUS
Sirius watched as the Princess hastily stood up from her seat next to him and hurried off in the direction of Fred Weasley. The same Fred Weasley he had been working with for the past few months. 
He tried not to stare, but it was too tempting not to. His eyes followed the girl as she deftly wove through the throng of people–people who tried to grab her attention to no avail. It was clear that she had a goal in mind and she wouldn’t stop until she got what she wanted. 
He watched as they locked eyes, as they shared identical smiles, as they glided through the dance floor and eventually made their way towards the gardens. It was almost ridiculous how elated he felt at the sight. 
The chair beside him made a sound as it was pulled back and he turned to see who had taken a seat beside him. Sirius tried to ignore the man next to him, the man who gave him nothing but a smug smile, but it was useless. 
“Enjoying yourself?” he asked, lips quirking slightly. 
“I think you owe me a few galleons,” Remus replied, looking very pleased. He cleaned up quite well in his navy blue suit, and Sirius had to hold back from causing a scene in the middle of a very prestigious ball just so that he could show Remus how much he loved him.  
Sirius rolled his eyes fondly, “So quick to judge the events that transpired this evening, Moony.” 
The look his husband gave him was enough for him to dig into his pockets for a few of the gold coins. Remus held out his hand, opening and closing it in front of him smugly. 
“You know,” Sirius said as he pressed the money into Remus’ palm, “When I made a bet against you, saying I was positive that the woman Fred was in love with was not the Princess, I really thought I was going to win.” 
Remus pressed a kiss on his cheek and smiled, “Never bet against me, love, you’re never going to win.”
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Series Taglist: @prismarts​ @snoopydoop1​ @the-romanian-is-bae​ @demoiselle-en-detresse00 @manuosorioh @daltonacademia​​​
General taglist: @expectoevans​ @george-fabian-weasley​ @gxthsanrio @slytherinscribbles​ @harpyloon​ @nuttytani​ @mesmerisedangel​ @amourtentiaa​ @just-here-to-escape-from-reality​ @lumos-barnes​ @cherryweasleys​ @writingsomewrongs​ @the-unmanaged-mischief​ @mrzweasley​ @inglourious-imagines​ @pr3ttysw33t​​ @amrtxntias​ @miraclesoflove @thatlonelyalto​​​​
Weasley twins taglist: @pineapplesandpinas​ @papapapadumb​ @a-castle-of--glass​ @hey-there-angels​ @leovaldez37 @pinkypurplemagic​ @werewolfslut​ @surprizeshawtyy​ @oldschoolkiddo​ @gcdricreads​ @turtletaylor98​ @secret-obsessions​ @weaslxyss​ @serendiipty​ @nojamsonmytoast​ @famdomhideout​ @georgeweasley19​ @asuperconfusedgirl​ @loonylovegood13​ @lumielikesbooks​ @nanahachikyuu​ @freds-slut​​ @theweasleytwinsgirl​​ @ghost3rr @littlemisswitt​​ @astoria-malfcy​ @weasleysprofessionalhoe​​ @freddie-weaselbee​​ @daydreamgirl8​​ @jubilee-the-flying-dragon-pirate​
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wonder-womans-ex · 3 years
Text
Conversations, Conversations, in the Early Morning Glow
Of all the things James was expecting to see today, Sirius Black sitting on his couch at five-thirty in the morning was certainly not one of them. 
He had been prepared to get up early, make some coffee and maybe an omelette, and head out for a quick jog before practice. But when he turned on the light, there Sirius was, one leg propped up over his knee, fingers drumming nervously on the sole of his shoe. 
Sirius looked up. They stared at each other for a moment, and then James took off his glasses and put them back on again. “Hello,” he said. 
Sirius bothered with none of the preamble. “How do you tell someone you’re in love with them?” 
“What the fuck?”
“I’m in love with someone and I want to tell them so, but I don’t know how.”
After taking a moment to process this information, James walked over to the kitchen. “I need caffeine for this conversation,” he said, glancing backward over his shoulder. “Want a coffee?”
“I—yeah. Sure. No sugar—”
“Lots of milk. I know.” 
They grinned at each other, but Sirius’s smile was slightly… off. There was something tense about it, almost like he was holding back. 
The coffee machine whirred quietly to life, red light blinking on, and James grabbed two mugs from the cupboard: the WORLD’S BEST DAD one Kuny had given him after Harry’s birth, and the one with the rubber ducks Sirius always used. He filled the kettle with water, flipped the switch on the side, and finally spun around to face his friend. 
Sirius had hopped up to sit on the counter and was swinging his legs slightly, bumping them in turns against the dishwasher; his gaze was focused somewhere on the floor in front of him. James paused for a moment before walking over and sitting beside him. “If Lily catches us, we’re both toast,” he said, finally, trying to lighten the mood. The corners of Sirius’s lips twitched up only slightly, and that was when James knew something was truly bothering him. 
“So.” The two of them took a breath almost in unison. “I’m going to need some backstory here. Are you in a relationship with this person? Are you merely admiring from afar?”
“In a relationship.”
No matter what he had asked, James had assumed Sirius was merely harbouring a crush. He’d thought that surely, if Sirius was dating someone, he’d say something about it. “You have a girlfriend? And you didn’t tell me?” 
“That’s the other thing.” A pause, like he was working up the courage to say something. “I’m gay, James.”
For the second time that morning, James took a moment to process this. He arranged his face—or tried to, anyway—into an expression that less resembled someone who had recently run into a brick wall, and then he put a reassuring hand on Sirius’s shoulder. “You have a boyfriend? And you didn’t tell me?”
The look of relief Sirius gave him was both immense and immediate. “Well, it’s pretty recent. Only a few months, really—since my birthday—and… I was scared. I’m still scared, but not as much as I was. But I love him. I really, really love him, and I want him to know that.”
Nodding, James slid forward off the counter to pour the now-boiling water into the top of the coffee machine. “Is it anyone I know? Is he from Gryffindor?”
“Yeah, you know him. It’s—well, it’s Loops.”
“Remus?” James jerked his hand backwards, away from the spill of hot water from the kettle. He hissed in pain when a drop landed on his wrist. “Remus Lupin? Our PT?” 
“One and the same.” Even without looking, he could hear the smile in Sirius’s voice. 
“And you want to tell him you love him?” 
“Yeah.” 
“And you came to me for advice?” 
Sirius leaned over and smacked his arm. “I can’t tell whether you’re insulting yourself or me more.” 
“Shut up. But in all ser—sincerity… does he love you, too?”
“I think so,” Sirius said, biting his lip. “I hope he does, anyway. I don’t know what I’ll do if he doesn’t.” 
James whistled quietly, not wanting to risk waking Harry. A crying child was the last thing either of them needed. “God, you’ve got it bad, haven’t you?” 
“Yeah.”
“Look.” James crossed his arms, staring Sirius right in the eyes. “I’m only going to say this once. You are my best friend. You are the third most important person in my life, falling just behind my wife-to-be and my son. If I had to pick one person to be stranded with on a deserted island, the only reason I would not choose you is that I think we would die within a week because neither of us actually has that much common sense. That being said, there are very few situations in which I would not trust you with my life. In the words of the youth, you are my bro.”
“Why is this starting to sound like a marriage proposal?”
“Fuck off. The point is, Pads, you deserve the best of the best. You deserve someone you love and who loves you. If that’s Loops, that’s amazing and I support you. If it ends up not being him, I’ll be here for you, and I’ll make sure any future boyfriends you may have don’t break your heart. Got that?”
For a moment, Sirius said nothing, and James grew more and more worried by the second. “Cap? You okay?” 
“No, I’m not okay, you fucker; I’m crying.”
“I hope they’re happy tears.” 
“What do you think?” Swiping the back of his hand across his eyes, Sirius let a grin spread across his face. “Are we supposed to bro hug now?” 
“You know what; why not.” Even just two years ago, they would have put their arms around each other nervously before awkwardly pulling away again (hell, two years ago Sirius probably wouldn’t have suggested it in the first place), but now they were miles past that, James even rubbing a noogie onto the crown of Sirius’s head. 
“Coffee machine looks like it’s about to overflow.” 
“Oh, thanks.” There was a comfortable silence as James poured out two mugs of coffee and added milk (Sirius’s) and sugar (his own), not broken until Sirius, mug in hand, said quietly, “How do you think I should tell him?” 
“Well, my advice, which is flawed at the best of times, would be to just tell him. But if you were planning on doing that, then chances are you wouldn’t have come to me in the first place.”
“I want it to be… I dunno. Romantic.” Sirius raised his coffee to his lips, taking a sip. “This is the worst coffee I have ever had in my life.”
“Well, duh. For the romantic part, I mean. Not the coffee.”
Laughing under his breath, Sirius poked him. “Try it. It sucks.”
“It does not—oh.”
“Told you so.”
James was halfway through pouring his coffee down the drain when Sirius’s phone rang. Both men froze. 
“Who is it?”
Sirius fished the phone out of his pocket, checking the caller ID. He visibly relaxed at what he saw, swiping up to answer. “It’s Remus,” he whispered. 
It was only thanks to the silence of the house that James could hear the voice on the other end of the line. 
“Baby?” Remus asked. “I’m, uh, I’m at your house—I bused—and, um, your car’s not here.”
“Oh, fuck, is it six already?”
“Yeah.” After a moment, he added, “Where are you?” 
“At the Potters’. I’m with James.”
“Are you okay?”
A smile flickered over Sirius’s face. “Yeah. I’m great. I… I came out to him.” 
James held his breath until—”Oh,” said Remus. 
“Oh? Is that—is that okay? Should I have waited—”
“No, no, of course not,” Remus assured him, the emotion in his voice audible even through the speaker. “I’m just surprised. And I’m proud. God, baby, I’m so fucking proud of you.”
“I’m proud of me, too.” 
“As you should be. Hey, I’m hugging you right now. You feel that? That’s my arms. And now I’m kissing you. Okay?” 
Sirius actually giggled, a sound James had never heard him make before. “I’m kissing you back.”
James wasn’t sure whether he grabbed the phone to put at least a temporary stop to all the mushiness, or whether his intention stayed the same all along. In any case, the first thing he said after wresting it out of Sirius’s grasp and pressing it to his own ear was “If you hurt my bro, I’ll kill you.”
“Hi, James.”
“Got it?”
“Yeah, I got it. But between you and me—and Sirius, I guess, ‘cause he’s probably listening, too—if I ever hurt him, I think I’d die before you even chose your weapon.”
When James glanced over, he saw that Sirius’s eyes were shining.
“Oh,” Remus added. “And please send Cap back over here. He’s not just my boyfriend; he’s my ride to practice.”
“You got it.” He waited until Remus hung up to say, “Hey, Sirius?”
Sirius took the phone when James held it out to him. “Yeah?”
“Get out of my house and go get your man.”
“Oui.” He slid off the countertop, landing on the floor with a slight thud. 
“Oh, and one more thing.” 
“Yeah?”
“What Loops said? Over the phone? If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.”
He got a grin for that, but he also got an elbow in the ribs as Sirius passed by him. “I’m going to tell him. Today.”
“You do that.” 
“Wish me luck. I’ll see you at practice.” 
“See you,” James said, leaning against the doorframe. “And you’ve already got all the luck you need.”
***
He hadn’t forgotten. He really hadn’t. He’d just had a lot on his mind, and Sirius’s promise of ‘today’ was pushed to the back. But when Cap’s car pulled into the parking lot with Loops in the passenger’s seat, it was brought immediately to the front again. He watched as they shared a warm, private smile, eyes not breaking contact for almost ten seconds. 
As soon as they walked through the arena doors, James was there to ambush them. “Good morning, gentlemen.” 
“Wipe that smirk off your face.”
“Well, we are temperamental today.”
“It’s because of your godawful coffee.”
“Touché.” 
Sirius smacked his arm. “I’m serious—and please don’t make that pun. I would like to be left alone with my boyfriend, with whom I am very much in love.”
“All right, all right!” James said, raising his arms in mock surrender. Go make out in the PT room; I won’t stop you.” 
Remus smiled when Sirius turned to him. “Yeah, sure, we can do that later. You go ahead—I need to talk to Pots for a sec.”
“‘Kay. Love ya.”
“Love you, too.”
Waiting until Sirius disappeared down the hallway to speak, Remus pursed his lips, trying to smother a grin. “Thank you,” he said, finally. “That—how accepting you are, I mean—means a lot to him.”
“I know.” 
“No, really. You were the first… you’re the only person he’s told, other than me. Coming out to you—it really goes to show how much more comfortable he is with himself. When we got together… well, he’s really come a long way.” 
James waited for a moment, sorting through the emotions in his head. “The thing is… I made him feel like I wouldn’t be accepting. This morning, when we were talking, he said he was scared. I’m part of the reason he was scared.”
Already, Remus was shaking his head. “He wasn’t scared you wouldn’t be accepting; he was scared of other people finding out. No, not of you telling people. Just that they’d find out.”
“That literally makes no sense.”
“Look, James, the way he grew up—if there’s one thing he learned it’s that if you tell one, you’ve told them all. He came out when he was ready to come out. Maybe not to the world—not yet—but to you.”
He nodded slowly. “I think I’ve got it. Oh—and, Remus?”
“Yeah?”
“He makes you really happy, doesn’t he?” 
“Really happy.” Even without the words, Remus’s grin would have said it all. 
“You make him happy, too. Happier than I’ve seen him in a long time.”
“Thanks—” 
“Don’t mess it up.” 
Remus laughed. “I should have known. Trust me, though, Pots; I’ve got no intention too.”
That seemed to be that—James made his way to the locker room, catching Sirius’s eyes upon entry and winking. Sirius simply rolled his eyes and walked over, bumping their shoulders together. “What did you guys talk about?”
James didn’t even try to lie. “You, mostly.” 
“Should have guessed.” Glancing away briefly, Sirius lowered his voice to barely more than a whisper. “Thanks, by the way.” 
“For what?” 
“Bullying me into telling Loops I love him?”
“Eh, that was mostly you. I just kind of stood there and let you talk at me.”
“Fuck off.” 
“Really, though.” James was only partly joking when he added, “I’ll be here for you again when you want to propose.”
A red flush spread across Sirius’s cheeks. “Maybe not for a while yet,” he said, smiling straight ahead at the jersey hanging in his locker. “But someday.” 
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marauders-venting · 3 years
Text
Gay Secrets and Fabulous Hair
pairing: jily (james x lily), wolfstar (remus x sirius)
genre: fluff FLUFF FLUUUUUUUUFFFFFFFFF
warnings: minor panic attack
words: 4508
“What’s up, Evans?” Sirius said, coming into the common room and sitting on the couch beside Lily.
“What? Oh, nothing,” she said.
“Come on, spill,” Sirius said. “What’s bothering you?”
“Nothing, nothing. Just Potter—”
“Ah, got James on your mind now, have you?” Sirius said, smirking.
“Shut up, Sirius,” she said, but she blushed and looked at her hands, giving her away entirely. “He’s just getting on my nerves is all.”
“Hmm, what did he do this time?” Sirius asks.
“Ok, this is going to sound dumb. But he won’t shut up about his hair and it’s giving me a headache. He’s just so self-absorbed. It was fine when I hated him because I didn’t have to listen to him rambling on about it all the time but now that we’re actually friends… it’s quite irritating.”
“Yeah, he hasn’t shut up about his hair for about seven years. Although I suppose I’m being a hypocrite right now cause, let’s be honest, neither have I.”
“True, true,” Lily said. “It just annoying, you know?” But she had a small smile on her face. She tried to hide it but Sirius saw it. He knew Lily fancied James. It was beyond obvious. But while she refused to admit it he could still have some fun, couldn’t he? Besides, it wouldn’t be long before Lily and James got together. He should take advantage of this opportunity before it’s too late. And he just had the perfect idea.
“You know,” he started, grinning mischievously at Lily, “we might be able to fix that.” Lily turned to him, eyebrows raised.
“I’m listening.”
---------
When James wakes up the next morning, Sirius is still asleep. Predictable. He changes and goes downstairs to breakfast but before he leaves the common room, a new notice on the noticeboard catches his eye.
Society for Witches and Wizards with Hair More Fabulous Than Life Itself
Exclusive invitations will be given to those with outstanding hair by tonight
If you wish to join and were not given an invitation, you may come to the auditions that will be held over the next two days and we, Lily Evans and Sirius Black shall decide if your hair is spectacular enough to join our club.
Again, it was predictable that Sirius would start a society for people with fabulous hair. But Lily? She was always going on about how James was too self-absorbed. This seemed pretty hypocritical. Although, in all fairness, Lily did have fabulous hair. James Potter, of all people, would know that.
All day, James waited for Sirius or Lily to invite him to join their society but neither one of them mentioned anything. Lily invited Marlene at lunch and she accepted, giving Lily a bewildered look until Lily whispers something in her ear and they both giggle and keep whispering together. James edges closer to where their sitting and tries to be as quiet as possible. Lily’s laugh was the most angelic sound James had ever heard and every time he heard it, it filled him with a sense of warmth and bubbly happiness and excitement. He knows that Lily doesn’t like him like that but he can’t help treasure these moments where he can appreciate all the little things about her that somehow nobody else seems to notice. Her laugh, her smile, her eyes.
James didn’t want to be in love with Lily. Loving someone who could hardly stand you was painful enough, but to become friends with her and realize that she’s more incredible than you could’ve ever imagined… that was a type of hurt James never thought he would experience. No, James did not want to be in love with Lily Evans. But it baffled him that there were people — living, breathing people who existed in this world — who had not fallen in love with her. James thought it was unavoidable.
He didn’t tell Lily any of this, of course. James had asked Lily out but she had turned him down. And that was it. He respected her decision. But that didn’t mean he could fall out of love. Because he was sure that it was love that he felt for Lily. True love or soulmates or whatever you want to call it. But this was it. This was the real deal. The only trouble was that it was only real for James.
It was nearly eleven at night when James finally asked Sirius about his invitation. He had given up waiting for either him or Lily to approach him and decided to just ask Sirius.
“I mean, I know we share a room but don’t you think you’ve waited a little too long?” James said. “Marlene got her invitation at lunch.”
“Um, Jamie, I don’t know how to break this to you but…” Sirius started, “you weren’t invited.”
“What?” James said. “But I have spectacular hair!”
“Just… come to the auditions tomorrow if it means so much to you, ok mate?” James merely shrugs.
The next day James still hasn’t decided if he wants to audition. On one hand, he knows he’ll pass the audition because, well, have you seen his hair? But on the other hand, he doesn’t want to give Sirius the satisfaction of knowing that James actually cares about his hair. Because he was sure that Sirius didn’t invite him on purpose. What other reason could there be? It certainly wasn’t because of James’ hair. That he was certain of.
It’s during lunch that James makes up his mind, after discovering that both Mary and Dorcas auditioned.
“They score you out of ten,” Mary explained to him. “I got a 7 but they said that isn’t a high enough score.”
“Don’t worry about it, Mary, you have beautiful hair,” James reassured her. Mary smiles at him like he’s a little kid.
“Thank you, James. I don’t really care, to be honest; I was just curious to see what they’re doing,” she says shrugging. “What did you get, Dorcas?”
“I got a nine,” Dorcas said.
“Good on you,” James says, clapping her on the back.
“Thanks, James,” Dorcas said laughing. “Are you going to audition?”
“Probably,” James said, shrugging. He tries to look nonchalant but he’s determined to go now.
When James finds the classroom that the audition is being held in, he knocks on the door.
“Come in,” says Lily’s voice. She and Sirus sitting behind a desk with quills and parchment. James enters and stands in front of their desk.
“Ok so how does this work?” he asks. “Do you just score me now or…?”
“Potter, you get a two out of ten,” Lily says, writing something down on a piece of paper. “Not nearly close enough to join. You’re dismissed.”
“What?! How? I have the best hair out of all of you!”
“Because Potter, your hair is messy and sticks up in odd places and it looks like you’ve never bothered to run a comb through it in your life,” Lily says.
“Sorry mate, she’s right,” Sirius said. He’s got a hand over his mouth but it’s clear he’s laughing.
“Wha— I… fine,” James grumbles. He points a certain finger in their direction and stalks out of the room, outraged.
---------
“Remus!” Remus turns around at the sound of his name and sees James walking towards him.
“Oh, hey James,” Remus says.
“Hi, Moony, my new best friend,” James says, swinging an arm around him. Remus looks at him suspiciously.
“What did Sirius do?” he asks.
“What makes you think Sirius did anything? Can’t a guy decide that no longer want a… a… annoying person as their best friend?”
“Really? Annoying person? That’s the best you can do?” Remus says, rolling his eyes.
“Give me a break, I’m not used to actually insulting Sirius,” James muttered.
“So what did he do?” Remus asks again.
“Did you hear about his and Lily’s Society for fabulous hair?”
“Oh yeah,” Remus said, laughing. “Oh. Did you not pass the audition?”
“It’s so unfair!” James bursts out. “I mean you and I have perfectly good hair.”
“Um, James…. I was, um, I was actually invited,” Remus mumbled.
“They invited YOU?!?!?!” James exclaims. Remus holds back laughter and nods. Benefits of fucking one of the founders of the society, I guess, Remus thinks. He nearly says it out loud but stops himself. James goes on to ramble about his hair but Remus isn’t really listening anymore. He’s thinking about Sirius (no surprises there).
If Remus is being honest with himself, he’s tired of sneaking around. He loves Sirius. He loves Sirius more than anyone. And he wants people to know it. He’s not saying they should go around broadcasting their relationship but being able to hold hands in public or make jokes (such as these) around their friends would be nice.
His whole life Remus had done nothing but hide his identity. When his friends found out he was a werewolf it was an enormous weight lifted off his chest. When he told his friends he was gay, not only were they all incredibly supportive, but it had given Sirius the courage to come out to Remus as well. That was how they got together in the first place.
Neither he nor Sirius had been ready to share their relationship with the rest of their friends back then. But Remus was ready now. But he didn’t want to push Sirius into anything. Sirius wasn’t out to their friends and if his family ever found out the consequences could be dire, even though Sirius no longer lived in Grimmauld Place. And Remus wouldn’t risk Sirius’ safety for anything. When Sirius was ready he would tell him. And Remus would wait. He’ll wait as long as it takes. He’d wait forever. Because nothing can compare, nothing can even come close, to the all-consuming happiness that Remus feels when he’s with Sirius. And he wouldn’t give that feeling up for the world.
---------
But Sirius was becoming tired of being closeted too. He used to be so afraid of leaving the closet. He felt the fear in his bones; it would make him shiver. It had been a safe place for him. Safer to hide his feelings, to bury them, than to risk his family finding out. Or worse, his friends finding out and hating him. But now the closet felt small and suffocating. Sirius was tired of hiding who he was. He was tired of it. When he was with his family he wore a mask of confidence and rebelliousness to protect himself. But when he was with his friends he had always been himself. Unapologetically himself. Keeping a secret this big from his friends, especially from James, felt weird and unnatural. But the threat of his family hung over his head like a vulture, waiting for the perfect excuse to strike, not only at him but at the Potters now too. And Sirius was afraid that this would be just the excuse they were waiting for.
---------
Lily and Sirius kept up the society for a couple of days before deciding that they had dragged it on long enough. They told the few people who had joined that they had been playing a prank on someone and thanked them for playing a vital part in it but it was over now.
Later that night, Lily was in the library working on her Charms essay with her friends, although they were doing more talking than working.
“Ugh, Lily, I can’t do this,” Marlene complained. “Please help me.”
“I can’t, Marls, I’m sorry,” Lily said, checking her watch. “I have prefect rounds soon.”
“You mean Head Girl rounds,” Alice corrected.
“Eh, it’s the same thing,” Lily said. “They’re equally boring.”
“Really? Even when you get to spend all that quality time with James Potter,” Dorcas said, winking at her.
“Shut up,” Lily said, blushing.
“Speaking of spending quality time with your crush—” Mary started.
“He is not my crush!” Lily insisted.
“You don’t really think we believe you, do you Lils?” Alice asked. Lily sighed in defeat.
“Fine,” she said. “I like him and I would also like to not make a big deal of it. You were saying, Mary?”
“I was just going to ask where Remus is,” she said. “He could help us with this essay if he wasn’t… preoccupied.”
“Yeah, he and Sirius disappeared after dinner,” Marlene said, smirking.
“Yeah, they’re not fooling anyone any more than you are Lily,” Dorcas said.
“Hey, I’m not that bad!” Lily insisted. “Am I?”
“Not quite,” Dorcas said, laughing.
“But that’s not saying much, Lils,” Marlene said.
“Ugh, now I really have to go,” Lily said. “But I can check your essay later if you want me to Marlene.”
“Lily, you’re an angel. I love you. Seriously, thank you so so much,” Marlene said, hugging Lily.
“Of course,” Lily said, laughing. “See you guys later.”
She hurried back to the Gryffindor common room to put her books away and find James. The first sign that something was wrong was that James wasn’t waiting to greet her at the entrance. Every day without fail, James would wait for Lily to be ready for their rounds, unable to hide his excitement. But today she finds him sitting alone in the common room, biting his nail and doodling on a piece of parchment while staring into the fire, seemingly absent-mindedly but Lily can that something is bothering him.
“Ah Potter, don’t be so upset about the hair thing, ok?” she says, coming up from behind him and ruffling his hair flirtatiously before she sits on the couch beside him. “It’s nothing personal. Well, actually no, it’s very personal but it’s all just a joke, right? It’s over now anyway. We called it off.”
“What?” he asks, looking at her. “Oh, yeah. I mean, no that's not why… you know what never mind.”
“What is it?” she asks.
“It doesn't matter,” James replies.
“Potter, something is obviously bothering you. If it didn’t matter you wouldn’t be thinking about it. What's the matter?”
“Fine,” James says. “It’s… I’m worried about Sirius.”
“Sirius?” Lily asks. She was confused. Sirius seemed fine to her. Happier, in fact, than he had been all of last year. Happier than he had been in a long time. She had thought that this was because he had left his family and moved in with James over the summer. But perhaps James had seen something that she hadn’t. “What about him? He seems fine, doesn’t he?”
“He seems fine,” James says. “But he keeps sneaking around at night and disappearing during the day—”
“Isn’t that custom for you two?” she asks, smirking.
“Yeah for us. But now he’s going alone. And every time I ask him about it he has the worst cover-up stories. I mean, there’s only so many times you can go to the bathroom in one day. I’m worried that he’s… I don’t know. He’s never done this before. I don’t want him to do something stupid and get himself hurt.”
“When you say sneaking around and disappearing… do you mean when he goes with Remus?” Lily asks, slowly.
“What?” James asks. “I mean, I never really thought about that. I just always figured Remus was going to the library to study or going somewhere with you or Mary or Alice. Like he does all the time. I didn’t think what they were doing was connected. Do you?”
“Um, Potter,” Lily says, starting to laugh, “you are really the most oblivious shit on the planet, aren’t you?”
“I am not!” James insists. Then after a moment, “what do you mean?” Lily rolls her eyes.
“I can’t believe I actually have to tell you this,” she says, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Remus and Sirius are dating.”
“What?” James says. Then after comprehending the words that Lily just said, he jumps up to his feet. “WHAT?” Lily starts laughing.
“How the fuck did you not realise that?”
“No way,” James said. “No fucking way. Sirius isn’t even gay, Evans.” Lily just laughs harder.
“Oh god, you really are stupid,” she says. “Fine, if you don’t believe me, go upstairs to your dorm right now, quietly, and see what Remus and Sirius are doing. If they aren’t making out, I will give you five sickles. If they are, you have to give me five sickles. Deal?”
“Deal. You’re delusional, Evans.” So they shake on it and James goes upstairs.
---------
The door is locked. James casts Alohomora non-verbally and creaks the door open. And there they are. Locked in a kiss, Sirius pressed up against the wall, his shirt hanging open, Remus’ jumper on the floor. James stands there, his mouth hanging open at the sight of his two best friends making out. Suddenly they break apart.
“James,” Sirius says, suddenly and Remus whips around to face James as well.
“Holy shit,” James says. “Holy shit. Um.”
“Oh god. James, we’re so, so sorry,” Remus said. “We didn’t mean for you to find out this way.”
“No, don’t be,” James said. “I’m sorry I— Sirius, are you ok?” Sirius’ whole body was shaking and his face was as white as a sheet.
“Sirius?” Remus said, turning towards him. Sirius just shook his head and bit his lip, hands trembling uncontrollably. “Come here, love,” Remus whispered. “Sit down. It’s going to be fine. I promise everything is going to be fine. Just breathe, Sirius.” James hurried towards Sirius and hugged him tightly.
“Sirius,” he said, pulling back and looking him dead in the eye, “it’s ok. I promise you, I don’t care. I don’t care if you like guys or girls or both or neither. I don’t care. You’re still my best friend. You’re still my brother. You’re still you.” Sirius nodded and he seemed to calm down a little. He closed his eyes for a moment.
“Try to breathe,” Remus said, softly. He was holding Sirius’ hand, tracing slow comforting circles in his palm. James smiled at their joined hands.
“So,” he said, as Sirius started to calm down. “You two are dating?” Sirius nodded and Remus said a quiet, “yeah.”
“So that means you’re gay too?” James added to Sirius. “Or bi? Or something else?”
“I… um,” Sirius started hyperventilating again.
“It’s ok,” James said quickly. “You don’t have to tell me anything.”
“No, no, it’s fine, I just…” Sirius closed his and took a deep breath. “I’m pansexual.” James was silent.
“I–I don’t really know—”
“Yeah, I figured you wouldn’t know,” Sirius said, nodding. “It’s ok, though, I don’t mind explaining. Basically, it means I like people of all genders. Like… I like them for who they are regardless of gender. If that makes sense.”
“Yeah,” James said. “Thanks for telling me, Pads. And I’m really sorry that I… y’know, walked in on you and freaked you out.”
“It’s fine,” Sirius said. “We meant to tell you anyway, we just…” He glanced at Remus. James nodded.
“You–you really don’t mind this?” Remus asked, biting his lip.
“Of course not,” James said. “I love you guys. You’re my best friends and I want you to be happy. And if being together makes you happy then I’m happy for you— wait, fuck!”
“What?” they asked at the same time, looking alarmed.
“No, no, it’s no big deal. Just now I owe Evans five sickles.”
“What?” said Remus. “You were betting on… what?”
“I told her that I was worried about you guys because you kept sneaking around and disappearing and she said that you’re together but I didn’t believe her. So yeah, she bet me five sickles that you two are dating.”
“Damn, I thought we were good at sneaking around,” Sirius said, shaking his head and laughing.
“You were,” James said, “but Evans is… she knows everything.” A dreamy look came across his face and Remus and Sirius exchanged a smirk.
“Proud of you, mate,” James said, snapping out of his daze and clapping Sirius on the shoulder. “You too, Rem.”
“Thank you, James,” Sirius says, hugging him, “for… you know. Being so supportive. It really means the world to me.”
“No, you shouldn’t be thanking me,” James says, hugging him back. “I should be thanking you for sharing it with me. See, that’s the problem with our world. Well, one of the many problems but those are to fix another time. Moony, come here, it’s group hug time.” Remus rolled his eyes but smiled as he joined the hug.
“Okay, um, I’ll… let you get back to… you know,” James said, gesturing towards the bed. Remus goes redder than James has ever seen but Sirius grins. James leaves the dorm and goes back to the common room, sitting down next to Lily, who is holding out her hand expectantly. James high-fives her and she rolls her eyes and smiles slightly. He fishes five sickles out of his pocket and hands them to her. She cackles.
“I told you so,” she says.
“Yeah, yeah, you’re always right and I’m oblivious and dumb.”
“Come on, Potter,” she says. “Time to patrol the corridors.”
“Ugh, do we have to?” he asks, pouting.
“Yes, Potter we have to. Stop complaining, I’ve been doing this since fifth year. And my partner got replaced with an annoying little shit so—”
“Rude!” James said.
“But true,” Lily said laughing.
“Ever heard of a white lie, Evans?” James says, smiling and standing up.
---------
They cover half the castle while making jokes and laughing, not really paying attention to whether or not students were out of bed or not until Lily decides she has to bring it up.
“Potter, what’s up?” she says.
“What?”
“What’s bothering you?”
“Nothing. It doesn’t matter,” he said, shaking his head.
“Come on,” Lily said, poking him in the side. “I helped you with the last thing, didn’t I? You can tell me.”
“Ok. It’s just… when I walked into the dorm they were kissing. And then Sirius saw me and he completely freaked out. Like he really thought that I wouldn’t be ok with it. He really thought I would hate him or something. And… I don’t know. I mean, after everything he still doesn’t trust me?”
“James…”
“It’s stupid, I know. This isn’t even about me. And I’m not trying to make it about me, I swear. I just… I don’t want Sirius to feel like he can’t tell me stuff. He’s my best friend. I tell him everything and I want him to feel like he can do the same with me. I don’t want him to keep secrets from me because he’s afraid that I’ll hate him because of it.”
“Ok, first of all, it’s not stupid at all. I get what you’re saying. But you have to understand where Sirius is coming from, too. It’s not that he doesn’t trust you. He would trust you with his life, James. He does. But usually, it’s the people we love and trust the most that it’s hardest to come out to. Because we think they’ll accept us but there’s always the chance that they won’t, you know? And if they don’t, how do you keep going from there? It’s taking a big risk. Sirius just wasn’t ready to risk his friendship with you. It means too much to him. Trust me, James, it was the same for me when I came out as bi. It’s not that he doesn’t trust you. It’s that he loves you too much to be ready to risk it.” James’ eyes were watering. He turned away so Lily wouldn’t see as he blinked them away.
“You really think so?” he asks quietly.
“Yeah,” she said. “But you can ask him if you want. Ask him if you can talk about it.” James nodded.
“Thanks, Evans.”
“Any time, Potter.”
“You called me James before.”
“So what if I did?”
“You never call me James.”
“I know,” she says. “Don’t get used to it.” Then after a moment, she adds, “I still can’t believe you didn’t know they were dating. I mean you literally spend all of your time together, you share a fucking room with them for Christ’s sake.”
“How did you know?” James asks. “Did they tell you?”
“God no,” Lily says, shaking her head. “You really think they would tell me and not you?
“I suppose not,” he replies. “How did you know then?”
“Well Potter, see I have these things in my head called eyes that I use to see. And then the things that I see go to my brain, where I string two and two together. Although, I suppose you wouldn’t know about that seeing as you don’t have a brain.”
“Oh, very funny,” James says, rolling his eyes. “Really witty. Your jokes are worse than Sirius’ puns.”
“Now that’s just mean.” And they both laugh. Lily has to bite her lip to keep from sighing. Ugh, his laugh is just too cute! she thinks. God, this is so stupid! Lily knows that James likes her. She knows that. And she likes him too. So what’s holding her back? She thinks for a moment and then the answer comes to her. Nothing. In this moment in time, right now, nothing is holding Lily back. She stops walking.
“Evans?” James asks, stopping as well. “Why’d you stop? Is everything ok? ” She leans forward slowly, not breaking eye contact with James. Lily waits until she sees the realisation grow in his eyes as he realises what’s about to happen and then she kisses him. Her hands find the back of his neck and she pulls him closer as she feels his hands in her hair. And then his hands are on her cheeks but only for a moment before she feels him pull away; he’s looking her dead in the eyes.
“Is this another joke?” he asks. “Because if it is it’s not funny.” Lily shakes her head quickly.
“No, it’s not a joke,” she says. “I swear, it’s not a joke.”
“Really?” he asks, his hazel eyes lighting up.
“Really,” she replies, smiling warmly. “I just really wanted to kiss you because… I like you, Potter.”
“Is this a dream? I mean, it’s gotta be a dream, right? Because there’s no way you just—” Lily laughs.
“No, Potter, it’s not a dream,” she said. “I really do like you and we really just kissed.”
“I— I… wow,” James said. “I mean, you know I like you, Evans, I’ve liked you forever. I just never thought I’d be lucky enough for you to like me. I mean…” James sighs and cups Lily’s face with his hands. “I love you, Lily. I mean, you probably already knew that but… I wanted to say it anyway.” Lily smiles warmth spreading from her cheeks to the tips of her fingers.
“I love you too, James,” she said, moving her body into his.
“Can I kiss you?” he asks.
“Yes,” Lily nods. And he does. Lily’s heart raced in her chest as James’ lips connect with hers and she tangles her fingers in his fabulous hair.
a/n: the part where James says that he should be thanking Sirius for coming out to him and not the other way around is based on my friend’s reaction when i told her that i’m bi. so yeah she deserves credit for that cause she’s the best
also regarding the part where sirius explains pansexuality to james,, please know that i am not pan and the explanation is something that i found on the internet. obviously, every pan person has a different experience but i hope i portrayed this fairly. if something doesn’t sound quite right to you please let me know because i dont want to spread a wrong image of pansexuality! thanks
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aidanchaser · 3 years
Text
Waterloo Station
Several folks said, “I would love to see more of Regulus and Sirius shenanigans!” after Chapter 18. Well, lo and behold, I actually have a deleted bit of Chapter 18 showcasing just that. The second draft was from Sirius’ perspective, but since Sirius lent his voice to In Memoriam, and we’re about to hit a short run of non-Harry chapters, I brought the chapter back to Harry in the third draft. (the first draft was an entirely different Harry chapter about breaking James out of prison, but that got pushed back in favor of some character development; we’ll get back to it, I promise.)
So here’s a short bit, taken out of my scraps. It’s headed with “MY DARLING” because it is one of several darlings I have killed while writing Deathly Hallows, but it’s the only one to earn the all-caps title. Thanks to the magic of fanfic, I can still share this darling with you. (the alternate title for this chapter should be: Sirius Accidentally Outs Himself as a Furry)
Padfoot hated the city. It was loud and there were so many people, each with their own scents and emotions. He supposed he should count himself lucky Harry had bled so much, or the trail would have been harder to follow.
He recognized the wizards on the platform easily. Their attire of slacks combined with hoodies or rain slickers paired with thick rubber work boots marked them easily as incompetently dressed Ministry employees. Sirius supposed they were keeping an eye open for someone stupid enough to come to the platform in search of Harry, someone just like him.
The platform had been scrubbed clean, but Padfoot could still detect Harry’s scent through the bleach. He didn’t board the train that pulled into the station, not yet. He waited, sniffing the entrance of the car carefully. He didn’t smell Harry or bleach. So he sat back and waited. A few Muggles scratched his ears as they passed or before boarding the train. Sirius let them without protest. 
He had learned that Muggles, by and large, enjoyed dogs as long as those dogs were gentle, still, and quiet. And if he was anything else — too loud, too quick, or too threatening — they were eager to chase him out or worse, catch him. It was a lesson he had learned early in his life, long before he had become Padfoot; it was just an easier lesson to follow when he was Padfoot. Something about a thick coat of fur, the eyes and ears of a predator, and four paws to run with made him far more comfortable and settled in his own skin than being a young boy in the middle of a war ever had. 
Another train pulled in, and this one, too, didn’t smell of Harry, but the third one did. He followed the Muggles into the carriage, and noticed a small black shadow slip in after him. It hid under the seat, and Sirius pointedly ignored it. He took a post at the door and waited, ready to check each stop this train made until he found Harry.
Regulus had tried desperately to talk him out of this, but Sirius had ignored him. Between him, Lily, and Remus, Sirius was the only one who could track down Harry, and if he didn’t, Lily and Remus would. Lily was far more likely to be recognized on the platform than Padfoot was, making Sirius not only the safest choice, but the most efficient choice, given Padfoot’s hunting instincts.
The first stop didn’t have even a whiff of Harry, but the second one did, though it was no longer paired with bleach. Sirius could only surmise that Harry had healed any open wounds before exiting the train and he felt both relieved and proud. 
That relief vanished almost as soon as he stepped off of the train. This station was enormous. It wasn’t just another Underground station; it was the biggest train station in London. Crowds hurried past, chasing after trains. Others clustered around kiosks and maps. Sirius’ heart sank. Harry could have boarded a train to practically anywhere from here, even Paris. 
The small black shadow slunk out of the carriage behind him and slipped into a tiny space beneath a nearby bin. Padfoot put his wet nose to the ground and followed Harry’s faint scent to a ticket station. From there it was difficult to determine where to go next. He thought he had a faint trail of Harry’s blood but it was unusual, mixed with something else.
“Pardon me, sir,” a nearby Muggle said, “but you need to have your dog on a lead at all times —”
“Oh,” a man looked down at Padfoot. “He’s not my dog.”
Sirius decided to follow the scent of Harry’s blood. It led him out of the station and away from the Underground service workers. The last thing he needed was for a well-meaning Muggle to try to help him find his owner. The few times it had happened in the past, he had always had James to bail it out.
Sirius shook off the stab of grief that came with the thought. It was always easier to shake off grief as Padfoot, as if the same abilities that heightened his physical senses dulled the sharper edges of his hurt. Besides, he reminded himself, there was nothing he could do for James right now, not until they were able to find whatever Death Eater prison he was being held in — and they had to believe he was being held. What Sirius could do was find Harry.
Though it had been less than twenty-four hours since Harry had passed through here, London had a way of making people invisible, of burying passersby in the scent of automobile smog and endless eateries. Sirius had to work hard to discern the scent of Harry’s blood through it all, but he managed to follow the trail south for less than a mile until it disappeared into a tall, brown-brick residential building.
Padfoot sat down on the pavement and evaluated his options. It would not be hard to sniff out Harry, if he truly was in this building, but a large dog was likely to be chased out of a private building. As Sirius, it wouldn’t be hard to charm his way into the building, but it might be harder to find Harry.
Padfoot barked softly at the bushes. The black cat that had been tailing him crawled out. He knew Regulus had no interest in helping him, and had only come along as emergency backup in case of a duel, but Padfoot gestured his head towards the building anyway.
The small, black cat stared at Padfoot, then back up at the building. Reluctantly, he slipped up the stairs and into the building on the heels of an unsuspecting resident.
Padfoot sniffed the stone retaining wall. Plenty of people had passed through here, but he didn’t smell Harry, not exactly. He definitely smelled the blood trail he had been following, but that wasn’t the same thing as Harry’s scent. He wondered if it was Greyback who had come through here, but Sirius was fairly certain that he would recognize Greyback’s scent if he came across it.
He wondered, briefly, if Regulus had been right when he had said that Sirius was better off staying with Remus and Lily, rather than hunting down Harry. The full moon was just two days away, and he knew Remus was nervous. Brewing the Wolfsbane Potion had been impossible this week. They had been moving too frequently to get together the ingredients, and they still hadn’t figured out where Remus was going to transform. Lily would need to be somewhere safe but on hand in case of emergency, and they couldn’t be anywhere too open that might put others at risk. Tonks had, kindly, suggested hers and her mother’s home, but that had only sent Remus into another downward spiral. Remus was wary enough of transforming around people he loved when he had the Wolfsbane Potion to keep his mind. He was never going to allow himself to lose control with Tonks so close at hand.
Sirius tried to shake his worries off. Remus was tomorrow’s problem. Harry was today’s.
Regulus returned from his investigation surprisingly quickly. He hurried across the street and over a low wall, into some plants. When he stepped out as himself, Sirius reluctantly followed and also used the wall as cover to return to his human form.
“What did you find?” Sirius asked.
Regulus smoothed the front of his cloak. “Harry isn’t there.”
“I know.”
“Then why did we come here?”
Sirius swung his legs over the wall. “Because someone here has information about Harry. Did you follow the blood trail?”
“It’s going to be a dead end.”
“I’d prefer you didn’t use that word.”
“The trail is cold, Sirius. We have no way to know where Harry has gone.”
“Give me a flat number and I’ll go myself.”
Regulus hesitated, but Sirius knew he would give in. They were stubborn, the both of them, but Regulus had never built up the tolerance for conflict that Sirius had. Sirius could thrive in the center of chaos; he’d had to in order to survive. Regulus, however, invested too much effort in fighting chaos. It was always going to be a losing battle.
Regulus crossed the street, back to the building. He pointed his wand at the lock, but it didn’t budge.
Sirius looked over Regulus’ shoulder. “Oh, it’s one of those keypads? <i>Alohomora</i> is no good.” He dug his own wand out and aimed a hot white spark. It fizzed and sputtered and then the lock clicked.
Regulus pulled the door open. “Did you break it?”
Sirius shrugged. “They malfunction all the time. Keeps the Muggle maintenance men employed.”
Regulus led Sirius upstairs to the top floor and gestured at a door near the stairwell. “The trail leads here. But I didn’t see, hear, or smell anything to indicate that Harry might be here. I can’t imagine Harry would have stayed in London.”
“No, but if whoever lives here had Harry’s blood on them, they might be able to tell us something.”
“And if that person is a Death Eater?”
“Then I guess we’ll duel them.” Sirius knocked on the door.
“We aren’t even going to try to disguise ourselves?” Regulus hissed at him, but Sirius couldn’t answer, because the door opened.
The gentleman in the doorway wore a fine Muggle suit. His skin was dark and he had a neatly trimmed beard and shaved head. He looked about Sirius’ age, and was about as tall, though definitely rounder in both face and build.
He looked over the two of them and raised a thick eyebrow. “Can I help you?”
Sirius held out his hand. “I hope so. My name’s Sirius.”
“Nigel Brooks,” he said, and shook Sirius’ hand warily. His eyes drifted over Sirius’ shoulder to Regulus, but Sirius had a feeling Regulus would not be keen on an introduction.
Sirius reached into his pocket and pulled out a photograph. “We’re trying to find someone, and we think you might have run into him.” The picture of Harry was from Remus’ wedding. He had folded it over so that Ron and Hermione were hidden, along with most of the movement in the picture. Harry still blinked and his smile moved slightly, but Sirius hoped the Muggle would just think it a trick of the light.
Brooks took the photo to examine it more closely, then shrugged. “Might’ve seen him around.” He looked Sirius and Regulus over again. “You don’t look like police.”
Sirius glanced down at his worn jeans and leather jacket. “Hardly,” he said. “I’m his godfather. His mother’s awfully worried. We’re just trying to get some information.”
Brooks returned the photograph. “I’m afraid I can’t help you. Best of luck, though.”
He started to close the door, but Sirius wedged his foot in the door. “We know you saw him, and at the very least, got his blood on you. We’re just trying to find out where he might have gone. There are dangerous people after him.”
Nigel straightened, and Sirius recognized a familiar determination in his dark eyes. “If what you say is true, and if I really did run into a young man, injured and running for his life, then what makes you think I would tell the first strangers who knocked on my door anything about him?”
“We’re his family.”
“Family can’t be dangerous?” Brook’s voice was cold, and Sirius, while he appreciated the man’s desire to protect Harry, felt outmatched. He didn’t feel outmatched very often.
“His name is Harry,” Regulus said, “and all we want is to know that he’s alive. You don’t have to tell us where he went, just tell us that he’s safe.”
Brooks stared at Regulus for a moment, then opened the door so it was no longer pressing on Sirius’ foot. “He’s alive, as far as I know. There was a lot of blood, but his injuries weren’t as bad as they looked. I thought whoever was chasing him had torn his wrist open, but when he showed it to me, there wasn’t even a scratch. He refused to go to hospital, just said he wanted out of the city, so I put him on a train. That’s the last I saw of him.”
“Has anyone else come asking for him?”
“No. You’re the first.”
“Thank you for your help.” Regulus inclined his head. “Sirius, we’re done here.”
Sirius did not think they were done. He wanted to know exactly which train Harry had gotten on. But Regulus was already leaving.
“Reg — wait —” But Regulus did not wait. Sirius eyed Brooks, but he supposed Regulus was right. They weren’t going to get anything more out of this man.
“Thanks,” he muttered.
“Sirius —” Brooks hesitated, and Sirius waited, hopeful.
But Brooks gave them neither a train nor destination. Instead, he handed Sirius a small business card. “If you find him, I’d like to know he’s alright.”
Sirius looked down at the plain white card. It had the man’s name printed on it and the contact information for an art gallery. 
“I’d find him faster if you’d tell me more.”
“He told me he was going to find his aunt and uncle,” Brooks said. “If you’re really his family, it shouldn’t be hard for you to track them down.” And he closed the door.
Sirius walked away, more confused than when they had arrived. He met Regulus at the bottom of the stairs.
“Did he tell you anything?” Regulus asked.
Sirius handed Regulus the business card. “He said Harry went to stay with an aunt and uncle. Do you think he meant Tonks and Remus?”
“I suppose that would be a simple way to explain their relationship to a stranger. Why would Harry go to Remus?”
“Maybe a fight with Greyback scared some sense in him.” Sirius found himself hoping it was true rather than believing it was true. Harry had been pushing them away all summer, and Sirius thought one duel unlikely to have changed Harry’s mind. Harry had his mother’s stubbornness, after all. 
Regulus handed the card back to Sirius. “I suppose there’s nothing else to do. We’ll just have to trust this man Brooks’ word that Harry is safe.”
“We’re hardly done.” Sirius was already walking back to the station at a brisk pace. “Now we show Harry’s photograph on the platforms. We start with the line headed for Tonks, and pray he didn't actually board a train to Paris.”
An unusual anger sparked in Regulus’ cold gaze as he hurried after Sirius. Not that Regulus never got angry, but he usually tempered it so well. “Harry is wanted by some of the most dangerous people in the world and you think it's a good idea to flash his picture around to every blasted Muggle in London — you’re also wanted by those same people! You can't just spend a day on a platform where they're surely to be looking for Harry — it’s absurd!”
Regulus' general frown of displeasure twitched with his outburst. His nose scrunched the tiniest bit and his already thin lips seemed to disappear. He looked so much like Narcissa. Sirius looked away, wishing his brother could wear someone else’s face. He wished, more often than not, that he could wear someone else’s face, too. Perhaps that was just another reason it was so much easier to be Padfoot.
“We’ll wear disguises.” Sirius surprised himself with the “we.” He had never wanted Regulus to come along on this hunt in the first place, but suddenly he was not keen on Regulus leaving him to it alone. “Hell we could even pretend to be Hit Wizards, deputised with hunting Harry down, if any wizards question us.”
“But the Muggles, Sirius! You’ll have to Obliviate every single one of them that you talk to, or else the Death Eaters or Hit Wizards or Muggle-born Registration Commision or Snatchers or any other group of wizards that want you and I dead could interrogate them and track it back to us — or worse back to Harry.”
“That will take us forever —”
“Why can't you just let Harry go? You know he got away from Greyback. Brooks put him on a train, helped him, made sure he wasn’t injured, so he must be safe somewhere. Isn’t that enough?”
“No. Not for me, and not for Lily nor Remus.” It wouldn’t be enough for James, either.
“You can't protect him from everything, Sirius. He’s seventeen now, and whatever Dumbledore’s asked of him —”
Anger flared hot and bright in Sirius' chest as he whirled on Regulus, and there was no Padfoot to soften the edges as he snarled Regulus words back at him. “‘Whatever Dumbledore’s asked of him’? Harry’s told us you're in on it so don't give me that hippogriff shit acting like you don't know. Like you're not keeping all the same secrets from us as Harry is. Like this is somehow less your fault, just because you slink away from arguments whenever you damn well please.”
Regulus’ temper faded from his face, replaced with an unusual, stricken expression that Sirius was not sure he had ever seen on his brother. Blacks felt many things, and usually felt them strongly, but fear? That wasn't something Sirius had seen in any of his cousins before, nor his brother.
But to Regulus’ credit, he did not transform into a cat and run away. He carefully schooled his expression back into its traditional calm and proud with a dash of disdainful form.
“I’ll help you find Harry,” he finally said in a quiet, almost apologetic voice. “But we Transfigure our disguises, no Polyjuice. It's too unreliable. And we Obliviate every Muggle we meet — don’t argue with me on this, Sirius! Yes, it will take longer, but it will keep Harry safer, and I trust that wherever he has run off to, he is indeed safe. We would have heard otherwise if he wasn't.”
Sirius took in several deep breaths to make sure his anger was cooled, at least enough that it would not attract the attention of those passing by them on the pavement, before speaking again. “Fine. Let’s do what we can today. And I want to put a word in the paper to Tonks, just in case he really did mean that he was on his way to her and Remus.”
“The paper? Sirius —”
“Not the <i>Prophet</i>. I’m not an idiot. Tonks, Remus, and I have a code we use for personals in the <i>Times</i>. Her idea. Said her dad used to use it in the first war to communicate with some of his Muggle-born friends, at first just after he and Andromeda eloped and had gone to ground to avoid her family, then as part of the war effort.”
Regulus shook his head. “It’s still risky —”
“It’s a war. There’s risk. Accept it and move on. The longer you whine about it, the longer nothing gets done.”
Regulus studied Sirius, and Sirius did not care for the intent look on Regulus’ face, almost like Regulus was trying to peer directly into his thoughts. It reminded him too much of their mother, trying to parse just how much trouble Sirius was in, just how much damage he had done.
But Regulus did not scold Sirius, nor criticise him. “I’m sorry,” he said instead. “You're right.”
Had Sirius been in a slightly better mood, he might have had a joke ready, made Regulus repeat his apology. As it stood, Sirius had trouble accepting it at all. Perhaps it was no real wonder he and Regulus had grown so far apart. Even when one reached out, the other couldn't bother to reach back.
He zipped up his jacket, suddenly cold, though it was only the middle of the afternoon, and kicked his boots against a nearby wall. It didn't lessen his frustration. 
And after a full day walking up and down train platforms, talking to and Obliviating every Muggle they met, Sirius was no less frustrated. The task ahead of them was enormous, and with each passing day that left them with no leads, it seemed more and more futile.
But there was nothing else to do. Lily and Remus did their part connecting with the Order, hunting down rumors of sightings of Harry, while Regulus and Sirius plodded on through Muggle after Muggle and Memory Charm after Memory Charm.
It was two full moons more before, finally, a Muggle woman frowned as she looked at the photo.
“I think… Goodness it’s been a while, but I think I did see him. Or I saw a boy who looked like him. Had red hair. I thought it odd with his complexion, but it was a dark sort of red, I suppose. The glasses… I can’t remember if he was wearing them or not. He was a twitchy lad, though, rather unhappy face. Is he in some sort of trouble?”
“No,” Sirius said, though it was not exactly true. He spoke quickly, anxious to get every detail out of this woman. “I’m his godfather, just trying to track him down. Can you tell me where he went?”
She pursed her lips. “I think… it must have been the rail line that goes out to Portsmouth — yes, I was visiting my sister that day, and I remember he had a large pack. I thought he must be on his way home from a walking tour.”
Sirius could not fathom what might have attracted Harry to Portsmouth. He wondered if it had something to do with Dumbledore. Maybe Regulus would know, but Regulus said nothing, mere stood at Sirius’ side, waiting to Obliviate this poor woman as soon as she was done talking.
“Do you know where he got off the train?” Sirius asked.
She frowned and handed the photograph back to Sirius. “I don’t know… he tripped over my bag on his way out. I felt awful. It… oh! It was Guildford. Yes, I remember, because —”
“Thank you so much for your time,” Regulus interrupted. Then, her eyes glassed over. She blinked at Sirius and Regulus, slowly, uncertain.
“Er — can I help you?” she asked.
“No, thanks,” Sirius grunted, and as soon as she was gone, he whirled on Regulus. “She might have had more information!”
“We needed to know where Harry had gone. Now we know. What else could she have told us? It’s not as if she followed him off the train. Besides, Sirius, she saw Harry over a month ago. There’s no way Harry’s still in Guildford, no reason he would stay in one place for so long.”
“Are you sure?” Sirius lowered his voice and tried to keep the threatening tone out of it, but he found it difficult. “You don’t know of anything in Guildford that might keep him there? Nothing to do with Dumbledore or You-Know-Who?”
Regulus’ stare was even, but that didn’t tell Sirius much. “Nothing. And if you can’t think of anything that would keep him there, then all we can do is go down there and see if some other Muggle happens to remember him passing through months ago — there’s just no sense in it. We know he got away safely. Let that be enough.”
Sirius was no longer listening to Regulus. He had plucked a map from a kiosk and was staring at Guildford on the network of spider web lines spiraling out from Waterloo Station, trying to make sense of why it had appealed to Harry.
“I’m an idiot,” he finally said.
“That’s nothing new,” Regulus said.
“Brooks told us where he was going from the beginning and I was too stupid to understand.”
“What are you talking about?”
“He was going to see his aunt and uncle, is what Brooks said. Not Tonks and Remus — his mum’s sister. Her Muggle family.”
“Does Harry even know them?”
“He knows they’re in hiding, and he knows their house will be empty — bloody hell I can’t believe I’m that thick.” Sirius balled the map up in his fist.
“Should we tell Lily and Remus —”
“Let’s make sure he’s there before we get their hopes up.” Sirius fought down another grunt of frustration. He had not felt this stupid in a long time, but how was he supposed to connect Harry to Petunia and Vernon, whom Harry had met perhaps twice in his life? He did not even wait to slip away to a hidden corner of the platform to Disapparate. He turned on the spot, in the midst of a crowd of Muggles, ignoring all of Regulus’ protests, and disappeared with a crack.
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My Gallant Lad - Part IV
So I got a wonderful anon telling me that this is their favourite Lily Rescues James fic, it’s part of my finished canon marauders fic We Can Be Heroes. But, because it works as a stand alone story, I posted it here in four parts. I hope you enjoy it! Set during the first wizarding war, Lily is very BAMF (but tbh so is James)
TW: angsty and violence
Part I here: After their worst row ever, Lily and James get captured by Voldemort...
Part II here: James tries to save Lily
Part III here: Lily tries to save James
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PART IV
(PS this is not pro- Snape at all, quite the opposite, for this to make sense you’ll have to read the other parts, lol!)
Mulciber swallowed.
“Now help me lift Potter, and for fuck’s sake be careful, he’s perilously close to death as it is!” Snape said.
He was so angry his body was shaking in agitation.
Mulciber lifted James’ body as though it were made of glass.
                                       ***
“I’ll take it from here,” Snape ordered.
They were standing underneath the main door of the castle, which led into the courtyard.
“I thought we were bringing Potter and his vile mudblood to the Dark Lord?” Mulciber said, frowning suspiciously.
“Change of plan, Mulciber,” Snape said matter-of-factly. “I want to try and get Evans to talk, that way if Potter snuffs it, we won’t risk being beheaded by him.”
“What do you mean?” Mulciber looked at him in bewilderment. “If you attack Evans and manage to injure her also, we’re doubly fucked!”
“I won’t fuck it up, unlike you dithering idiots I actually know what I’m doing!” Snape says angrily.
Mulciber stared hard at him.
“Are you sure you’re Snape?” he said, narrowing his eyes and reaching for his wand. “You’re acting strangely and I-“
“He’s Snape all right, but under the Imperius Curse,” Lily interjected. “Expelliarmus!”
Mulciber’s wand flew into Lily’s outstretched hand.
“You?” Mulciber seethed. “How in Morgana’s hell did you manage to Imperio him? Last I heard you were wailing painfully awful songs from your cell, giving us all a headache! I thought you’d given up!”
“The great Gaels of Ireland are the men that God made mad, for all their wars are merry, and all their songs are sad,” Lily shrugged. “You just hadn’t experienced the merry part yet!”
“You’re not a man,” Mulciber sneered.
“Ha!” Lily’s face broke into a harsh smile. “What Chesterton didn’t say about Irish women is that when they’re angry, all their wars are won!”
Mulciber stared at her sullenly.
“Not my fault that you consistently underestimate me, Mulciber!” Lily shot back. “You think you’d have learnt by now!”
Mulciber’s face looked like curdled milk.
“Too late,” Lily said. “Obliviate!”
Mulciber’s expression changed slowly to one of utter confusion as he looked between Lily, James and Snape. He hadn’t even seen the spell hit him.
“What happened to him?” he said, scratching behind his ear and staring at James’ body. “Where’s your Head Girl badge? Your uniform?”
“Quidditch injury,” Lily said flatly. “Vicious Slytherin tactics. One hundred points from your House, now back to your common room before I have you expelled!”
“Whaat?” Mulciber said, looking utterly bewildered.
“I’m counting till ten. Ten… nine… eight…” Lily said.
Mulciber stumbled and turned immediately, muttering incoherent protests.
“Not bad, Lily Evans,” Snape whispered with a vicious grin. “Not bad at all.”
                                                  ***
“Outside! Now!” Snape ordered.
Lily Evans remained silent as she walked outside at a steady pace, Snape following her and dragging James Potter’s body along the ancient flagstones.
“Now, it seems that nothing will persuade Dumbledore’s man to reveal what has happened to the Dark Lord’s precious treasure, a book Dumbledore’s men stole! Potter nearly died refusing to tell us. I’m ordering you to tell me, or I’ll make you kill your own husband!” he called out.
“No, I won’t tell you anything,” Lily said with effort.
“Wow! That’s dope!” Villiers whispered loudly to Wilkes.
The two men were sitting on the battlements having a smoke and peering down with interest at the scene unfolding below them.
“Look what Snape is up to! I never thought he was into that shit!” Wilkes replied. “He usually lets us handle that kind of stuff, says it’s boring!”
They looked at each other and grinned.
“Massive!” Villiers giggled, bumping fists with Wilkes.
Snape picked up his wand.
“Last chance, Miss. Evans,” he said, dragging James closer to the middle of the courtyard.
He was holding two other wands in his hand.
“What is going on here?”
Snape whirled around.
Voldemort was standing at the castle gate, and with him Evan Rosier. Voldemort’s wand was pointed at him.
“I am quite simply trying to establish the whereabouts of your missing book, my Lord,” Snape said. “I thought this might work.”
“Rosier here tells me you have been acting exceedingly strange,” Voldemort’s voice was icy. “He thinks you may be under the Imperius Curse.”
“Rosier is neither observant nor intelligent, my Lord,” Snape said stiffly.
“Be that as it may, Severus, you are not yourself, you would not usually dare speak to me with this much courage,” Voldemort replied, stepping forwards.
“My Lord?” Severus replied.
“Let us see what happens, shall we?” Voldemort said, whirling around at the last minute and pointing his wand at Lily.
“Stupefy!” Voldemort said with a lazy swish of his wand.
Lily Evans crumpled to the ground. Snape stood motionless, as though unsure what to do.
“Ah, the spell fades, I see. I had hoped you would not be so easily overcome by it. You disappoint me, Severus, I thought you were stronger than that. I thought you knew the mudblood well enough to watch out for any tricks she might play? Or were you too enticed by her beauty to focus on doing your job properly?” Voldemort spat out. “You shall pay for this mistake! And the object of your affections will most definitely pay.”
“I’m afraid I underestimated the mudblood,” Snape said, with a condescending smirk at the Dark Lord. “I don’t know her as well as I thought I did. She should perhaps have been sorted into Slytherin. It appears that Lily Evans is a devious little bitch!”
Startling emerald eyes glared at Voldemort from Snape’s face. As the wheels in Voldemort’s mind whirled, Snape removed a leather bracelet from his wrist and tapped it, revealing a large glittering brass key.
“Póg mo thóin, Riddle!” he said, flicking the V at Voldemort (who looked momentarily stunned) as he grabbed hold of James’ arm and apparated into thin air.
“I don’t get it,” Rosier said, looking at Voldemort and rubbing his forehead as though in pain. “Was that Snape? No, hang on.. what was..?”
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” roared Voldemort, raising his head as his blood-curdling screams carried over the courtyard and into the surrounding forest.
He kicked out viciously at Rosier’s leg sending him hopping around in circles howling with pain. A family of carrion crows, disturbed by the commotion, flapped and squawked upwards from the turrets and battlements.
“Which one of you is the imbecile who allowed Lily Evans to escape?” he screamed at Rosier. “Why did none of you stop her?”
Villiers and Wilkes ducked down behind the walls of the battlements, grimacing.
A splash of white bird dropping landed on Voldemort’s nose. Rosier stared at him.
“You have some…” he said, pointing to Voldemort’s face. “Just there?”
Voldemort looked ready to kill him.
“If you don’t permanently dispose of this group of crows by Salazar’s soul, I will feed you to them myself!” he shouted wildly, waving his wand at Rosier, and rubbing his face furiously with the back of his sleeve.
“A murder of crows, not a group, but whatever,” Rosier muttered to himself, looking peeved, as he aimed Avada Kedavras at the screeching birds.
Voldemort walked over to the body of Lily Evans and stared at the darkening hair and sallower skin, Snape’s eyes looking up at him.
“Legilimens!” he intoned.
The memory was tampered with, powerfully, so that he was unable to see some of the earlier incidents, but he could see the conversation between “Snape” and Avery, Fuck Voldemort, I hate that bastard! Avery running off to hide from him. Seething with rage, he grabbed Rosier’s arm and touched his dark mark.
He watched as all his followers apparated around him, all except Snape who lay half-stunned on the ground, and Hugo Avery.
“Find Avery, bring him to me, now, or you all die!” he hissed, the red veins in his sclera protruding menacingly. “Nooooowwwww!!!!”
                                                  ***
 “I don’t know what happened,” Frank said, his croaky voice difficult to understand in between coughing fits.
“He needs to come with me to the Infirmatory,” Poppy interrupted, looking at Dumbledore and pointing towards the door.
Frank continued coughing and shook his head forcefully.
“We were ambushed… they were waiting for us… they wanted to get Black and Lupin,” he wheezed. “They got Lily and James… I wanted to create a diversion but before I could move, one of them released noxious fumes, no doubt to catch any other Order members, I was knocked out cold… I fell backwards and the thicket hid me from sight… woke up freezing cold a short while ago… I couldn’t find any trace of them whatsoever. I only got back just as Lily apparated here with James, he looks bad.”
The ancient double door burst open as he spoke, and Sirius Black stormed inside, his black jeans soaking wet, his leather jacket still in his hands, closely followed by a haggard-looking Remus Lupin.
“We came as soon as we got your owl. Where are they?” he roared, going straight up to Frank and grabbing hold of his collar urgently. “Where the fuck are they? Tell me!”
Remus found himself unable to utter a single word.
                                                     ***
The door of the Infirmary flew open, Sirius breathless as though he had just sprinted up five flights of stairs (which he had). He looked at Lily and seeing the pain and fear in her eyes, he forced himself to look at James lying unconscious in the bed behind her - it didn’t look like his brother, the bruised and battered body covered in what he immediately recognised as myriad curses, his usually tanned skin a deathly pale colour. He looked already dead. He looked back at Lily, the darkness under her eyes, her quivering lips.
“Lily,” he tried to say her name but no words came out, caught in his throat.
“I know, sweetie,” Lily’s voice a hoarse whisper.
Then they flung their arms around each other, gripping on for dear life. Sirius felt her chest heave and held her even closer as her quiet sobs filled the silent room, shattering his heart.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered back, his breath still caught inside his chest, trapped.
What could he say, hearing her heartbroken sounds?
“We won’t... we shan’t let him die,” he managed to say eventually, shutting his eyes tightly to stop himself breaking down. He moved to take both her hands in his own, looking down at her with tears in his eyes.
He didn’t even know was he trying to comfort her or was he trying to comfort himself.
“I… I used an Unforgivable, Sirius,” Lily said eventually, keeping her head down.
“I would have sprained my wrist throwing Unforgivables at the bastards!” Sirius said. “I wish I could have done it for you.”
He had badness in him already, let him hold it for all of them.
It should have been him. He should have been there instead of James, instead of Lily.
“I’m glad you didn’t,” Lily’s voice shook. “I did it to save James… it felt wrong, Sirius, it is wrong and disgusting, but I know I’d do it again to save him. Am I a bad person, Sirius? I.. I saw what they did to him, I wanted them all dead… I thought about it... I wanted to. I don’t want to become like them, Sirius, but I wanted to kill them, so badly!”
“Lily, you didn’t kill them. You could have tried to, but you didn’t. You saved James. Merlin, you saved my brother, the only brother I have left, I can never thank you enough,” Sirius’ voice broke.
He wondered what he would have done in her place.
“It was Snape, he wanted to save me, but I had to find James, I couldn’t… he hurt James, I hate him for it,” Lily said desperately, squeezing Sirius’ arms.
“Fuck that creepy bastard!” Sirius said.
“What if Voldemort kills him? What if he dies? It will be my fault!” Lily whispered. “I hate him so much, but I don’t want to get him killed. I wouldn’t care if he died in battle, not now, not after everything he’s done to James! But being tortured and killed for trying to save me? I don’t want that, am I mad?”
“You had to,“ Sirius said, gripping her tightly. “You had to try to save James. You couldn’t leave with Snape, you know that would have been wrong! You are not to blame for anything Voldemort does!”
“I need James too, Sirius, he doesn’t see that, he thought I could manage without him, he’s so stupid, such a stupid, darling, beautiful man,” Lily stopped, her hand over her mouth.
“He can’t die, Poppy won’t let him die,” Sirius whispered back.
Lily nodded, still crying. He saw her sway and grabbed hold of her shoulders.
“Merlin Lily,” he said anxiously. “Sit down immediately! Are you alright? Are you hurt? Do you need Poppy? Will I get-“
“ No, please, Sirius, I didn’t get hurt, James-“ she stopped, unable to continue, and bringing her hand up to her mouth again.
He didn’t think he could handle hearing what had happened.
“Hush, Lily, you’re both safe now,” he heard himself say.
“He... I couldn’t... I tried...” she said. She closed her eyes and swayed again, sitting down suddenly and placing her head between her knees.
“I need some water, and something to eat,” she said, sounding suddenly anxious as her almond shaped clear eyes searched Sirius’ for reassurance.
“I... Merlin, yes of course, Darling, let me get that for you!” Sirius said, relief blossoming at some small task he could do to help. “Do you want a firewhisky instead?”
“No! I can’t drink now I’m ... I’m a bit dehydrated Sirius, I better stick to the water,” Lily said, placing her hand over her lower abdomen in a protective gesture.
“Yes of course,” Sirius said feverishly, throwing his leather jacket on.
“I’ll get it,” Dearborn was standing in the doorway looking at Lily uncomfortably.
“Lily, I know you already had a debriefing with Professor Dumbledore, but he was wondering if you wouldn’t mind answering a few more-“ he continued.
“No!”
Both Lily and Sirius spoke at once.
“Not now, my husband needs me here, Dumbledore can wait,” Lily said, staring at Dearborn with a hostile expression as she swiped at her red eyes furiously.
“Tell him to go fuck himself,” Sirius growled.
Dearborn nodded, recognising defeat.
“You get some food and water for Lily, Caradoc, I’ll tell Dumbledore,” Remus said. Remus stood quietly behind Dearborn, a grim look, no obvious emotions displayed on his tired face.
“Righto,” Dearborn nodded reluctantly.
“Hurry up,” Remus ordered. “We don’t want Poppy to end up with another patient.”
“Righto,” Dearborn said, looking relieved to have an excuse to leave.
                                                      *** “You wanted to speak with me, Mr. Lupin?” Dumbledore said, gesturing vaguely towards the chair in front of him.
Remus sat down. The silence made him nervous.
“You feel guilty for swapping your week on call with the Potters. You want to make sure that your friends are protected from danger as much as possible from now on?”
Remus felt his cheeks flush. He nodded, feeling even worse.
“Good,” Dumbledore said. “I can see why you’d think that way.”
Remus swallowed. Dumbledore blamed him too? He wanted to crawl under the floorboards never to re-emerge.
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, looking down, unable to meet the Professor’s gaze. “I should have stayed…”
“That’s quite alright, Remus, these things happen, and we have to learn from them,” Dumbledore said.
Remus felt himself slide further down the chair. He wanted to cry. It reminded him of The Prank at the end of Fifth Year. It should have been him. He should have insisted Sirius go with someone else. He felt personally responsible for what had happened, and if James died because of him… if James died…
“What can I do, Sir?” Remus whispered hoarsely. “Tell me there is something I can do to help!”
He looked up and caught Dumbledore looking at him keenly, with an astute gaze.
“Of course there is something you can do to help, Remus,” Dumbledore said, steepling his hands together. “It will be dangerous though, the most dangerous mission I have ever given any member of the Order.”
Remus nodded dumbly.
“It is also top secret. You must not discuss this information with a single soul,” Dumbledore said, his blue eyes assessing Remus coolly. “Not the Marauders, not Lily Potter, especially not Sirius Black. Understood?”
“Yes, Sir,” Remus said, sitting up straighter. “You can trust me.”
“I hope so, Remus,” Dumbledore said. “Most people wouldn’t.”
Remus froze, taken aback.
“I…” he stuttered.
“Luckily for you, I am not most people, Mr. Lupin,” Dumbledore smiled pleasantly. “Lemon sherbet?”
Somewhere in the back of Remus’ mind the words you bastard and what the fuck presented themselves as appropriate responses.
He declined politely.
“I have a singularly important and quite unusual mission, and it seems to me that you are the perfect candidate to volunteer for it,” Dumbledore said, sucking loudly on the muggle sweet and leaning back into his chair.
Somehow the wizard’s eyes seemed beadier in this light. Remus waited.
“I will of course understand if you turn down this opportunity, Remus, that you may be too frightened to go,” Dumbledore said. “Other Order members may be more-“
Remus’ jaw tightened. The words you bastard and what the fuck once more presented themselves as appropriate responses.
“Other Order members have no idea how little I fear most things,” Remus said, his eyes narrowing.
“Yes, of course, Remus, I am well aware that compared to most-“ Dumbledore said, with a placating raise of his palms.
“What mission?” Remus asked.
“A mission to infiltrate Fenrir Greyback’s werewolf pack. I am aware you have already made his acquaintance,” Dumbledore said. “To see if they can be persuaded to abandon their leader and join our side in the war. And to spy on them, at any rate.”
Remus felt a cold shiver of dread run down his spine. His old Headmaster couldn’t be serious, surely. That was a hopeless mission, a pointless waste of life, a …
Greyback…
An ear-splitting scream of terror, his own. Rabid eyes. Massive yellow canines lunging towards him, saliva dripping off them. Laughter and howling.
“Tell your Daddy I said hello!”
A tearing sensation as huge teeth sank into his hip. Another ear-splitting scream, this time of pain…
He felt his hands tremble and gripped the edges of the armchair in agitation.
“If you’d rather not, I am sure I can persuade another member of the Order to pretend to be a werewolf. With some clever Transfiguration spells, which many of our members are particularly gifted at, especially your own friends-“ Dumbledore said.
“No!” Remus said, standing up suddenly and staring hard at the other man, his breathing erratic. “Merlin no! You have no idea…”
His voice trailed off again, his heart hammering wildly against his ribcage.
“So, Mr. Lupin, you don’t feel you can bring yourself to-“ Dumbledore said.
“No!” Remus practically shouted. “I’ll do it! Don’t even think about asking anyone else… I’ll do it, alright?”
“I see,” Dumbledore smiled kindly again. “My deepest apologies Remus, how very brave of you. I should never have doubted you.”
Remus bit the side of his lip. This was akin to agreeing to a suicide mission. Any sane individual would have refused to accept the offer. But surely Dumbledore had guessed he would never allow any of his friends or colleagues to go instead of him, to risk being turned? The bastard must have known all along. Yet he owed so much to this old man, this powerful wizard, the one they were all relying on to beat Voldemort and to win this war. The one who had given him a chance. Who had risked his reputation by allowing him into Hogwarts. Who had not expelled him after the disastrous Prank in Fifth Year. Maybe he was being unkind and unfair to the man. Perhaps this mission was genuinely important?
“No need to apologise, Sir,” Remus said with a small smile, extending his hand out.
“Thank you, Remus,” Dumbledore said, shaking his hand warmly. “I do appreciate your help in this war. I shall contact you shortly with more information about this entire affair. Please remember to keep this top secret.”
“Yes, Sir,” said Remus.
                                           ***
He opened the door quietly. The room was dimly lit by the fire and the large candles on either side of the infirmary bed. James looked the same, somewhere between life and death. Lily was sitting on a chair, her head lying on the bed beside him, still fully clothed, the dark shadows under her eyes more pronounced in this light. She was holding James’ hand. Sirius was nowhere to be seen, but at the foot of the bed, on top of the carefully folded blankets lay Padfoot. He was whimpering in his sleep. The shaggy dog opened his eyes briefly, fixing Remus with his mournful grey eyes.
“Sleep, Padfoot,” Remus said quietly. “I’ll stay up. I’ll call Poppy if there’s any change. There’s nothing more we can do.”
Padfoot yelped quietly, turning to look at Lily and James and then looked back at Remus and whined. He was looking at Remus accusingly. Where had he disappeared off to, why hadn’t he comforted Lily? Did he not care?
“I’m sorry,” Remus said.
It sounded curt. Inadequate.
What more could he say?
Padfoot whined once again, dropping his head into his paws, looking dejected. Remus sat on the ground, his head in his hands. He could go over, talk to Sirius, but his boyfriend always knew if he was hiding anything from him, and he was too tired to make up an excuse for what had just happened. Too tired, too traumatised, too selfish…
He stayed where he was.
Padfoot slept fitfully, beset by nightmares. Remus did not sleep a wink. He did not allow himself to sleep. The fear of nightmares kept him awake, as though he were four years old again. Besides, he did not deserve to sleep.
                                          ***
PS Póg mo thóin - kiss my ass in Irish
PS To find out if James is okay, and if Lily is in fact pregnant and if yes, what happens next etc, I’m afraid you’ll have to keep reading  We Can Be Heroes. If you just want to read on, it’s from Chapter 45.
 If you want, I can post more stand alones (Harry’s birth? the Jily engagement? Jily Wedding? Wolfstar first kiss etc??or the next part but it just leads into more stuff!)
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Prompt: Arcturus at the birth of Sirius
November 3, 1959
"Pacing like a madman isn't going to make this go by any faster, boy."
Orion—dutiful as always—only nodded at the pointed remark from his father, eliciting a light sneer from the patriarch.
Honestly—not a hint of anger, nor even frustration at the jibe. Arcturus almost savoured the day when his son would finally tell him what he truly thought of him, but, rather like the boy Walburga was currently bringing into the world—it was slow to come.
As always, all the men of the black family were gathered in the drawing room, smoking cigars and drinking brandy. Cygnus was looking positively sloshed, no doubt because this boy that was being born was meant to remedy his own mistake in siring only daughters. Alphard was as inscrutable as always, damned vagabond. Pollux was red-cheeked and merry, oblivious to his son's misery, puffing on his cuban with the utmost gusto.
This was what was left of the Black Family.
He was starting to see some truth to all his grandfather's curmudgeonly ranting.
Orion's pacing grew all too wearisome after a few more minutes, and Arcturus found himself at his limit.
"By Salazar, boy—sit down!"
Orion turned to him, a shocked look on his face before acqueiscing. Arcturus didn't fail to notice the tense jaw.
Good. Let the boy stew a bit more—only a matter of time before he finally grew a spine.
The occasion was bittersweet for Arcturus. On the one hand, Orion's marriage to his abominable cousin finally producing something of worth was cause for celebration—on the other, it showed just how far the Black family had fallen.
All their hopes hinged on an infant boy—it was difficult not to be bitter about the fact. And with his brother Regulus's death just a few months before, it had put the Black patriarch in a foul mood that hadn't ceased since. Only Melania knew how to navigate his temper now, and even her subdued manner grated every now and then.
As if on cue, the aforementioned woman burst into the drawing room, dress slightly disheveled and bags under her eyes speaking of tiredness.
His poor wife—to have to manage twenty-seven hours of Walburga's screeching. He would get her a gift one of these days—perhaps that rare orchid she was eyeing when they went to Nott Manor. She'd never said much about it, but Melania didn't say much about anything. One had to read between the lines with her, and even then the woman's emotions were as mysterious as the day was long.
"A boy, dear—practically perfect in every way!" She beamed, then walked over to where Orion sat, shell-shocked at the news, and kissed him on the cheek.
"Well," Arcturus groaned as he stood—one of these days he might very well need a cane, his leg had been killing him these last few months. "Best not dawdle—let's go see my grandson, Orion. Unless, you wish for me to wait until after you've seen him first?"
Orion turned to him, then after a moment's hesitation, shook his head deferentially. "Of course not, father—you're more than welcome to see him with me."
For God's sake boy, anything! Call me miserable, tell me I'm a bastard, one sign of dissent to show you've a man's spine!
Rather than voice this, Arcturus merely harrumphed in dissapointment and followed Orion out of the drawing room, all the way up the stairs. The walk was—like much of their meetings—silent and uncomfortable, punctuated by the mutterings of the portraits as they went by.
Reaching the door of the room Walburga was in, Orion dallied for just a second before finally collecting himself and opening the door.
When they entered, Walburga was quite obviously miffed with her husband for allowing his decrepit old father to push him into coming along with him. Honestly, you'd think he was still in the nursery sometimes, yanking on his father's pant-leg for the slightest bit of attention!
"Orion," she greeted, smiling in a manner best described as murderous. She turned her flinty gaze to the elder. "Arcturus."
"Walburga," Arcturus nodded back. "I'm here to see my grandson. Or do you intend to hide the boy away forever?"
Her eyes narrowed, giving her smile an even more brittle quality to it. "Certainly not. Please, Arcturus," she emphasized the name, shooting her husband a glare for good measure, "Come meet our son."
Orion approached her warily, as if she were Mephistopheles himself, whilst Arcturus had no such compunctions and walked forward confidently to the bed.
When he caught sight of the boy, he smiled.
Black hair, aquiline nose, grey eyes—A perfect Black specimen. Perhaps Walburga wasn't the worst choice for Orion—Nightmare she may have been, she had little of the Crabbe looks aside from her eyes appearing blue in a certain light. Orion, on the other hand, looked more a Macmillan than some of his cousins who actually bore the name. Their son was a testament to Black genetics—bearing the name on both sides, as well as the looks.
Arcturus nodded, an approving gleam in his eyes as he took in his first grandson. "The boy's every inch a Black. Fine job, the both of you. You especially, Orion."
Walburga looked mightily offended at Orion being given extra commendations, seeing as how she'd just spent twenty-seven hours bringing the newest black heir into the world—but her husband either didn't notice or didn't care as he stuttered over his thanks for his father's first compliment in what must've been five years.
"Thank you, father." Orion turned back to the boy, all his focus on his son, and a smile that could be called tender growing on his face. "He's perfect, Walburga."
Her face softened at that, and she even allowed herself a small smile at her husband. "Would you like to hold him?"
Orion nodded, gleefully, before taking hold of his son as if he were made of the most delicate china in the world. He gazed down at the boy lovingly, smiling like a madman at every coo and fuss that came from the boy as if he couldn't believe he were real.
"What will you name him?" Arcturus asked, breaking his son out of his downright womanish fussing after allowing him a generous amount of it.
Orion's smile grew larger, if anything, and he stared up at Arcturus hopefully.
"Sirius," Orion said, and Arcturus felt as if someone had poured a bucket of cold water over his head. "For my grandfather."
"You didn't even know your grandfather," Arcturus said, half an accusation. Orion heard the harsh tone and flinched, caught completely blindsided.
"I meant to honour him," Orion replied, nervously.
"If you'd known him, you'd know he wasn't a man to honour or emulate in the least." Arcturus fired back, an anger and resentment he'd stewed over since he was nine years old bubbling to the surface.
"Orion meant it for your father," Walburga said, each word coming out through gritted teeth. "But I was the one who chose it—and I had your great-uncle in mind."
Arcturus blinked. "Ah, well then I suppose it's not too," he shifted his feet, uncomfortably, "bad a choice. Let me see Sirius then, Orion—or do you mean to hog him forever?"
Orion, snapping out of his hurt, nodded fervently and placed the boy into his father's arms, hovering over his back as if anticipating his fall.
Arcturus evaluated the boy closer, and he saw it—those eyes. Black they were, but he could see the impudence in them from a mile away. The baby, oblivious to his grandfather's test, reached up and yanked a hair off his mustache.
"Ow!"
Orion rushed forward and took the baby out of his incensed grandfather's arms, hushing its giggles as if worried his father would take even more offense to them.
"Impertinent little—," He sighed, running a hand over his face.
"Father, I—"
"It's not a problem, Orion," Arcturus replied, spitting out every word with the utmost venom. "I'd only suggest watching the boy in future—there's an impudence there that I like not."
Orion looked at Arcturus as if he'd grown two heads, but nodded. Walburga, in the corner, looked to be trying to muffle a fit of cackles with her pillow.
Impertinent whelp.
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