#NO BABY! 😔😪 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

babydollmarauders · 6 months

Text

MEDIA MANAGEMENT — JACK HUGHES (23-24 SZN PART 11)

au masterlist

y/ndevils00

liked by jackhughes, nicohischier, and 251,869 others

y/ndevils00 well… that was painful

welcome back to my post-game recap! if you don’t know who i am because you’ve been living under a rock, or you’ve been in jail (don’t do crimes unless you can get away with them), i’m y/n! or as my boyfriend calls me, ‘dove’! i work as the social media manager for one of the sluttiest teams (and maybe the worst this season…) in the National Hockey League: the New Jersey Devils!

let get into it! your favorite (or maybe least favorite. i wouldn’t blame you!) men from hell lost 4-6 against the patriotic old guys tonight…. i can’t say i wasn’t surprised

we had an absolutely scoreless (and sinless) first period on our end, transitioning into intermission down by 3!

but second period is when we really started heating up! we got FOUR lovely goals by THREE lovely people!!

starting with uncle Toffee!! who scored our first AND our fourth goal!! he’s been so queen girlboss slay recently! who knew he would be this good?! not me! i doubted him severely! (i cannot apologize for my previous thoughts about you uncle, i can only ask you to forgive me anyways because you took my DILH and i’m still recovering)

Timo the absolute Tank Engine got us our second goal of the night with his first goal of the season! and no penalties!! i feel like a proud mother to a usually extremely horribly behaved little boy 🥹

and of course, my favorite whore, my very best swiss, my least favorite kind of cheese; captain slut got our third goal of the night!! THAT’S MY HOE!! POP OFF! (he also got a penalty tonight but i’ve opted not to show that because he paid me $20)

and i could never forget to mention that my beautiful angel of a bad bitch, Rowdy, got an assist on THREE out of four of our goals tonight!! he’s only 3 points away from 20 points already!! THAT’S MY (baby)GIRL!

and third period is when we immediately went as cool as the ice they skate on… giving up three goals (including an empty netter to the oldest looking man alive)… we got no goals of our own and my sweet baby angel face bestie number 1 got a penalty for being too perfect 😔

all-in-all, let’s wish the boys luck against the sabres on friday because apparently they need it! i think friday’s enemy gave them some pretty good advice though and they should put it to use!

p.s. ikea baby and merc-dog are my exact reactions to how badly we played in the third

p.p.s. ovi… when i catch you ovi 🥊😑

tagged john.marino97, tofff73, tmeier96, nicohischier, jackhughes, lhughes_06, jesperbratt, and dawson1417

Load more comments

jackhughes dove, baby, what is that abomination of a 5th photo?

y/ndevils00 my camera wouldn’t focus :(

jackhughes so why post it?

y/ndevils00 you don’t appreciate my talents

jackhughes i can assure you, i appreciate your talents plenty. photo taking is just usually not one of them

lhughes_06 gross

user29 did she just threaten OVECHKIN?! 😭

user17 i fear we may lose these updates after this threat 😪

jesperbratt what was i 😦 at?

y/ndevils00 i honestly couldn’t tell you— i was too busy wondering the best way to fit you in my pocket

john.marino97 i got a picture?!

y/ndevils00 you got an assist and no penalties!

john.marino97 but dawson got a penalty and no assists and still got a picture?

y/ndevils00 you’re not dawson, the standards for you are different

john.marino97 i’ve known you for 4 years and this is how i get treated? DAWSON HAS ONLY KNOWN YOU FOR 2!

y/ndevils00 you tattle on me, you deserve your treatment

dawson1417 she’s got you there, bud

tofff73 you doubted me?!

y/ndevils00 in my defense, i didn’t know you were chill like that

tofff73 jack has informed me that you cried at the trade, i forgive your doubts

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes YOU’RE TELLING HIM MY SECRETS?!

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 i wasn’t aware that you usually blast your “secrets” on your instagram story

user81 the random luke picture… y/n loves her smush 🥹

tmeier96 did you just call me a tank engine?

tmeier96 also, i’m OLDER than you!

y/ndevils00 that was a compliment! i’m saying you’re built!

tmeier96 you’re a funny little thing

y/ndevils00 also yes you are older— i said i FELT like a proud mother, not that i AM one. i already have one reckless child at home, i don’t want another

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 she’s a cat.

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes SHE IS OUR BABY

trevorzegras you love testing how far you can push before you get a warning for your behavior, don’t you?

y/ndevils00 i learned from you 🫶

trevorzegras you’re a cockroach

y/ndevils00 all i’m hearing is that i’m resilient and can live through anything

trevorzegras i hate you

y/ndevils00 you WISH you hated me— if you really did then you wouldn’t facetime me twice a week

nicohischier there are so many things i take issue with about my paragraph

y/ndevils00 is it that it’s not long enough? i’m sorry, i’ll make it longer next time!

nicohischier please DON’T.

lhughes_06 ya know, you were a lot nicer before i joined the team

y/ndevils00 oh good! that means i’m doing this right!

lhughes_06 doing what right?

y/ndevils00 tough love!

dawson1417 i didn’t do anything :(

y/ndevils00 i know, sugarplum!

dawson1417 they jailed me…

y/ndevils00 i can’t imagine how traumatic that must’ve been for you

dawson1417 oh it wasn’t that bad, you were in there too

y/ndevils00 yeah…. lindy put me there in 2nd intermission. he said if i wouldn’t stop chirping the capitals as though i was a player, then i needed to be treated like a player and get a penalty…. then i couldn’t get out because the game started again

dawson1417 you can’t skate, how did you get in?

y/ndevils00 i was betrayed

nicohischier @/y/ndevils00 i stand by it.

y/ndevils00 @/nicohischier YOU ALMOST DROPPED ME TWICE

nicohischier those were on purpose.

dawson1417 and how did you get out?

y/ndevils00 my knight in shining armor!

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 i didn’t get you out?

jesperbratt i did!

jackhughes oh, yeah, that makes sense

#media management au!#media management series <3 #jack hughes #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes imagine #jack hughes fic #jack hughes blurb #nj devils #nhl imagine #nhl fic #faithlynn’s insta edits <3 #faithlynn’s writings <3

221 notes · View notes

tokio-motel · 8 months

Note

nah cuz i jus thought of smth..

kaulitz twins(together headcannons or full fic the amount of fucks i give are not even close to one) when their bf asks if they love him jus out of the blue like they could just be sitting down together and he jus asks the question not even lookin at em😪✌🏾

and ofc they finna be like duh why tf is wrong with u😀 this mf prolly says nvm and tries to shove it off as if its nothing like bro🧍🏾

HA not me thinking of tom panicking and heading to his phone deleting every contact(he ain't cheating or anything hes jus mad worried)😔🤞🏾

NO AND BILL THINKING HES NOT LOVING ENOUGH STOPPPPP ugh😞😞

u can add more if u wish man🥲🥲

KAULITZ TWINS X READER: LOVE

I WAS GNA MAKE THIS SAD BUT I FEEL LIKE I'VE DONE TOO MANY SAD THINGS RECENTLY

"Ah, here we go!"

Bill grinned excitedly as Tom placed a plate of pancakes infront of him, drenched in maple syrup and a slab of butter on top. Tom smiled at his brother, then at you as he placed your own plate of food infront of you.

"You better eat that. Do you know how long it took to make?" Tom joked, sitting down next to you as he took a sip of his orange juice, gagging slightly as he nearly spit back into his cup. "Bill what the fuck! I told you no pulp!" he chocked, coughing as he shivered dramatically.

Bill rolled his eyes as he stabbed at his pancake, glancing at Tom with an annoyed look. "There's nothing wrong with pulp,'ya baby." he muttered, laughing quietly as he watched Tom gag, face all scrunched up. "Pulp is nasty as fuck! Right, M/N?" Tom asked, looking at you with a quirked eyebrow. Bill also looked over, biting into a strawberry.

"I don't mind it." You shrugged, giggling as Tom's jaw dropped, hanging low. Bill let out a triumphic laugh, taking a big gulp of his own orange juice. "I can't believe you betrayed me like this.." Tom sniffled, dramatically wiping away a fake tear from his eye.

The room was filled with the occasional "mmh.." when one of you tasted something good, or the clatter of glasses when you would put your orange juice down. The occasional scrape of the forks against the plates would sound commonly. It was..nice. The silence was comfortable, or at least for the twins.

For you? It seemed weird and strange. You felt as if..as if it was empty in here. You knew they were at ease, everything was fine but you just couldn't help but ask..

"Do you guys love me?"

You asked quietly, taking another bite of your food after stabbing it with your fork. Ah, now the table was uncomfortably quiet. Tom's hand stopped in mid air where he was going to take a bite of his bacon and Bill looked up from his plate, looking at you with concern.

"What?" Tom asked quietly, feeling his heartbeat pick up and his hands become suddenly too sweaty to hold his fork. He glanced over to Bill, but Bills eyes stayed on you, his mouth open yet no words could come through. You shrugged, glancing at both of then before taking another sip of your orange juice.

"Eh, 's nothing." You respond, taking the last bite of food and smiling as your taste buds rejoiced in the flavour. Really, Tom was a fantastic cook! Too bad most of the pancakes he flipped landed on the ceiling...

"Want me to take anything back to the kitchen?" You asked, grabbing your empty plate and utensils. They could only shake their head, Bill forcing a small "No thanks, babe." You nodded and headed off to the kitchen, placing the items in the sink. You turned the water on, grabbed the sponge, and whistled to yourself as you began to scrub the crumbs and sticky syrup off.

---

As soon as you left, Bill turned to Tom quickly, eyes big and wide. "Did you do something?" he whispered, poking his older twin in the shoulder with his fork. Tom hissed in response, swatting Bills hand away. "Why do you think I did something? What did you do?"

Bill immediately shook his head from side to side, becoming defensive. "I didn't do jack shit!" The air between them was quiet, before Bill asked under his breath, "Did you like, text someone else..?"

Tom's heart dropped, his legs felt numb and his phone in his pocket felt 10 times more heavy. "I mean.. I didn't text them." he said sheepishly, rubbing the bath of his neck. Bill raised an eyebrow, scorching over closer. "Who's 'them'?" he asked, tilting his head in confusion.

Tom hesitantly pulled out his phone, going to his contact list. Bill gasped jokingly, scrolling through what seemed to be hundreds of people. "Holy shit.." he giggled, not being able to contain himself. He yelped as his brother hit him rather harshly on the arm. "Help me out here, Bill. He's my boyfriend too."

Bill sighed, resting his head on Tom's shoulder as they scrolled through each contact.

"Who's Stacy?" Bill asked, saying one of the many contacts that had a girls name.

"I dunno, some girl from a concert." Tom responded, clicking on her contact. There was no profile picture, no notes, nothing.

"Yeah...no. Delete her."

And so Tom did. Girl after girl. To the point where he only had around 20 contacts left.

---

You hummed a song under your voice as you placed your now clean dishes back onto the dish rack to dry. Drying off your hands, you walked back to the dining room. You smiled softly at the twins, taking their plates aswell as their cups and utensils with you. Before yo could walk through the doorway, Bill yelped a small "Wait!"

You turned on your heel, looking at him with confused eyes as you leaned against the doorway, clinking your nails against the plates. "...Yes?" you ask slowly, smiling softly as you saw how he turned slightly red, leaning towards Tom. Tom sighed, looking up at you from his seat as he fidgeted with his dreads.

"I just..you know we love you so fuckin' much, right..?" he questioned quietly. You chuckled quietly, it was cute how they seemed slightly worried and almost cautious to ask the question.

"Yes, of course I do." You answer, flashing a grin that they quickly returned, smiles identical.

It was the happiest you've ever seen them.

191 notes · View notes

ssahotchnerr · 1 year

Note

aaron just absolutely babying you when you’re sick 🥹 like even if it’s just a seasonal cold, he’d bring you soup and make sure you’re drinking water and that you have everything you need right by your bedside 😕😕 or if you were dating and you came into work with a little cough and runny nose, he’d be like “go home, sweetheart, you need to rest” 😔 omg i’m making myself miss someone who’s not even real 😪

symptoms

part two of under the weather <3 cw; language, mild descriptions of sickness, mention of food

something had caused you to stir.

it must've been hours later- the sun had set, casting darkness into the room. you immediately took notice in the fact you were absolutely drenched in sweat. your clothing was clinging to your skin and your hair was matted to your neck. you must've made a sound or whatnot, because it didn't take long for aaron's voice to fill your ears.

"oh shit, i'm so sorry sweetheart." aaron apologized, guilt forming on his face, present in his voice as well. "i didn't mean to wake you."

"s'okay." you barely murmured, your voice scratchy from the effects of sleeping and in result of your sore throat. you attempted to stretch from your laying position, but failed miserably to do so. your body felt exceedingly heavy from the flu that had overtaken you, and you felt as if you couldn't even lift a finger on your own. mumbling a few words did no good either, coughs beginning to rapidly shake through you.

"here." aaron took ahold of your forearm gently once you had come down, helping you to sit up enough to allow him to prop your pillow against the headboard, and gently directing you to lean back against it. he then took ahold of the glass of water on your bedside table, holding it to your lips and allowing you to sip from it.

afterwards, aaron's mouth drew into a frown as he studied you, the sweat on your forehead illuminated from the faint glow of the lamp in the corner. "give me a second?"

you nodded.

aaron soon returned with a cool, damp washcloth, folding it into a rectangle before placing it on your forehead. the coolness immediately soothed your skin, and you let out a sigh of relief at the contact.

aaron's face showed visible concern, his eyebrows drawn together. if you hadn't felt so sick, you would've told him to wipe that look of his face. and as if he were reading your mind, "how are you feeling?"

"awful."

"i'm sorry." aaron nodded in understanding, his face sad. "i also brought you these. and apparently, not quietly either, since i woke you." he offered you a small smile, his gaze dropping to a bag of cough drops and a small bottle of cold and flu medicine.

you gave him a smile in return, looking up at him with a fondness that even sickness couldn't limit from you. "thank you darling."

"and whenever you're up for eating, there's soup on the stove. chicken noodle." he sat on the edge of the bed, trailing his thumb along the surface of your cheek. "jack's at jessica's for the night. that way, you can rest without him jumping onto you at four in the morning."

you laughed softly, ignoring the ache in your throat that it caused. "yeah, he does tend to do that."

aaron's face softened at the sound of your laughter. "is there anything else you need?" you nodded in response, and his thumb immediately halted. "what is it?"

"you."

all concern aside, he laughed softly, bringing himself fully onto the bed to lay with you, unbothered by your germs completely. if he gets sick, he gets sick— he wouldn’t deprive himself the contact, especially at your request. "anything else besides that?"

"nope." you buried your face into his shoulder, sniffling softly. "just you."

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner fluff #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner drabble #hotch imagine #criminal minds #criminal minds drabble #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds fluff #criminal minds fanfiction

604 notes · View notes

zvdvdlvr · 1 year

Note

daryl x female yn that says 'kissie?' whenever she wants a kiss please

- 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞

𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒: (𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵:) 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘺𝘭 𝘹 𝘧𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘦 𝘺𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘴 '𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘦?' 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘢 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘰, 𝘪 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘦𝘯𝘷𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘦𝘳𝘢, 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘳𝘰 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵𝘴 🤫🤭🤪😝😏😶😌😪😔🤤😷😬🤨🤔😛😋, 𝘱𝘦𝘵 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘴 [ 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵, 𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘺 ]

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘺𝘭 𝘥𝘪𝘹𝘰𝘯 𝘹 𝘧𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘦!𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳

✦✦✦

"Mornin' sweetheart," Daryl rasped, sitting up from his bed. y/n was reading one of Carl's magazines by light of a lamp. She turned, closing the thin paper book, and smiled at him.

"Morning, baby," she murmured, crawling back to lay beside him. "You sleep well?"

Daryl nodded. "Yes ma'am. Why're ya dressed already? Where ya goin'?"

y/n laughed. "Michonne and I are making a formula run. We gotta get Judith some diapers. Why?"

"Jus' wonderin' where ma girl's goin'."

y/n scoffed and poked Daryl on the chest. "You make fun of Beth and that other kid for bein' too mushy then you go sayin' stuff like that," she laughed.

A laugh bubbled up Daryl's throat. Yeah, he really did poke fun at the youngest Greene and her boyfriend just to turn around and make goo-goo eyes at y/n. "Whatever," he whispered, staring into y/n's eyes.

She watched him watch her intently, hand fiddling with Daryl's growing hair. How she ended up with a crossbow wielding softie redneck as a boyfriend after the downfall if society: she will never know. "Kissie?" She broke the silence, doe eyes the purest thing Daryl had ever seen.

"Mornin' breath, sweetheart," he warned."

y/n rolled her eyes.

Daryl smiled. "Come 'ere," he ordered, letting his hands slide to hold the back of y/n's neck to pull her close. He kissed her roughly, unlike most good morning kisses. Daryl felt y/n sigh into his mouth, something that always drove Daryl wild. The hunter felt y/n grasp desperatly at his hair, shoulders. He felt the way her lips moulded beutifully with his and groaned low in his throat.

"How can you go that long without breathing?"

y/n jumped up at the sudden, loud asked question. Daryl sat up too, an embarrased flush creeping up his neck.

Michonne watched the two split apart like two magnets with her own jaw dropped. "Y'all where like-" she cut herself off eith a shudder. "y/n, best let your man take care of his boner cos we got some scavenging to do," she explained before turning and leaving. Daryl swore on the hair on his head that Michonne muttered "five damn minutes, glued like that" as she left

"Well!" y/n said, turning to Daryl. "Guess I'll see you later. Bye," she said, untangling herself from the bed and peering into the large mirror shard to fix her hair.

Daryl pulled her back in for another kiss before she left, whispering 'be safe' against her flushed lips.

635 notes · View notes

mrs-monaghan · 11 months

Note

We know JK is so bothered about a friend peeling perila leaf for his partner. He can't trust his partner even with that simple thing, so should we even talk about intimate choreography, living with producers, going for weeks long foreign trips ? You are saying a man who can't stand a simple perilla leaf peeling is cool with the above things?

No. He wasn't

He wasn't okay with any of that anon. Like, not even a little bit. I think we have witnessed satellite Jeon for so long that we have forgotten what it actually means. JK always wanting to be next to Jimin, Jimin having a calming effect on JK, JK gravitating towards Jimin when sad, satellite Jeon means Jimin is JK's person. It means Jimin is more than just his boyfriend, he is his safe space. JK needs him. He doesn't just want him, he doesn't just love Jimin, he needs him.

Jikook live together, yeah? And this is after all members used to live in one house for years. So they've done nothing but be around eo for over 10 years. AND YET what happens when any content is released?

We have them backstage walking from point A to B together

We have them sitting and standing next to eo all the time

We have JK displacing members to be next to Jimin

We have JK following Jimin

We have them leaving premises together

We have them cheating to be on the same team

We have them staying up all night drinking alone together

We have them practising group choreos together

We have them hanging out at each other's rehearsals.

And all this happens after they left the same house and will go back to sleep in the same bed at the end of the day once they're done filming. When I call them interdependent... I mean they are interdependent.

Jimin is JK's safe space I'm pretty sure this has been established by how hard satellite Jeon works sometimes.

He failed. But he tried. Poor baby. 😪

What's my point you ask? My point is, JK has only known being with Jimin almost all the time. When they're good, of course. When they haven't fought and are giving eo space, JK only knows how to have Jimin with him at all times. And this has been the case for years. Then solo era comes along and Jimin moves out for a while, and even though I'm sure he made time for JK, it just wasn't enough.

JK went from waking up to Jimin, seeing him everyday, to seeing him what, thrice a week? Once a week? Who knows? Either way, his Jimin time had been cut considerably short and satellite Jeon was not handling it very well. Add that to the fact that they are supposed to lay low, can't be seen out together in public hanging out like they used to before.. and it was maybe a bit too much for JK.

So no anon, JK was not cool with any of the above things that you listed. We all saw it for ourselves. Coming live without permission and being unapologetic about it. First sign of defying the company. Coming live all the time coz he was bored and needed company. The drinking on every live even though he wasn't allowed to. Deleting insta and making the company lose money coz of it while most prolly not giving a shit. And then white day happened.

😔

This couple holiday that JK has spent with Jimin every single year and once again his boyfriend is not just busy but out of the freaking country! So what happens? Mans breaks down. He's at his limit here, anon.

I only wanna talk to Jikookers rn coz they're the only ones that truly understand how seriously Jikook take this couple shit. Be it matching rings on the same finger, or matching clothes on couple holidays, or matching clothes more often than with other members. And it happens even now, btw.

From JK ending up with Dior merch

To Jikookers spoting that one red CK underwear that clearly didn't belong to JK

And it couldn't be more clear they shop together. This one is neither here nor there but I'm throwing it in here anyway coz why not? 😂😂😂

(They've always had very similar taste)

Then we have spending birthdays together, couple holidays, etc. They've done this forever. So for Jimin to be away on the last white day before they have to enlist and be away from eo for 2 years, I can imagine it kinda hit JK hard and may have been one of the things that got him emotional that day.

So no anon, JK was definitely not cool with any of the above things that you listed.

And we know this, because as soon as Jimin's promotions ended, not only did JK go MIA, but when he popped back up, mofo was fucking glowing

He looked absolutely incredible. There was shine in his eyes and in his smile. It was so good to see him that way. And that has continued to be the case in the lives that he did after that. Sad JK was gone. JK that needed to drink when he came live, was gone.

So now i ask; Was this visible change that happened once Jimin was no longer as busy a coincidence?

#if jikook isn't real then neither am i #jikook is real #ask shaz #bts ask #jikook #kookmin #minkook #jimin and jungkook #bts #jimin #jungkook #park jimin #jeon jungkook #jikook theory #jikook theories #whipped jungkook #whipped jk #satellite jeon

253 notes · View notes

quicksilversg1rl · 11 months

Text

yourusername

Liked by billieeilish and 2 452 345 others

yourusername photo dump 😋

View all 13 268 comments

billieeilish 💋💋

lizzobeeating cuties🩷🩷

yourusername love ya lizzo 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

y/nismywife 2nd slide y/n?? 🤨🤨

y/n_l/n_updates thats literally evan peters bye

y/nplsmarryme WHAT SHE HAS A BF?? NOOO😪💔

evanpetersupdates I know evan when I see him😨 that’s definitely him

y/n_l/n_updates

Liked by y/nplsmarryme and 14 142 others

y/n_l/n_updates y/n spotted with her bf in new york today!

View all 2 376 comments

y/nplsmarryme this is getting too real now 😖

evanpetersrecent that’s literally evan 🧍

mrspeters nah I don’t think it’s him

evanpetersrecent @/mrspeters girl it is you’re just in denial

evanpetersismyhusband we lost him guys 😪

y/n_l/n_updates you never had him in the first place pls 💀💀

y/n_ismywife idc who it is as long as she’s happy 🩷🩷

evanpeters

Liked by yourusername and 3 750 258 others

evanpeters 🥶

View all 33 222 comments

yourusername cool hat!

evanpeters thanks 😄

evanpetersrecent @/yourusername HELLO??

evanpetersupdates @/evanpeters y’all think y’all so slick 🙄

mssarahcatharinepaulson looking good evan!

evanth0maspeters_fp she liked the post I’m done 🫠

mrspeters 😍😍😍

yourusername

Liked by evanpeters and 986 459 others

yourusername metgala 💃

View all 3 990 comments

gabbriette gorg!

yourusername thanks angel 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

alexconsani ate

yourusername 🤭🤭

evanpeters 🤩

yourusername 😚😚

tate_langdon_defender @/evanpeters NO GO AWAY

evanpetersfan @/evanpeters out of all her pics to comment on you comment on this one 😭😭

evanpetersrecent his comment?? her reply?? they aren’t even trying to hide it anymore 😭😭

y/n_l/n_updates mother is mothering

evanpetersfan forget evan I want her 😫

mrspeters we don’t even know if they’re together…

evanpetersfan @/mrspeters shut up

y/n_l/n_recent evan is so lucky ugh

evanpeters

Liked by pascalispunk and 4 237 444 others

View all 27 505 comments

evanpetersrecent hello who’s he kissing ??😭😭

y/n_and_evan_updates we all know who it is 🫣

evanistheloml my eye started twitching fr

evanpetersfan pookie posted again 😋

mrspeters wish that was me fr 😔

yourusername

Liked by evanpeters and 4 783 351 others

yourusername can you tell he’s sick of me?

View all 13 973 comments

evanpeters I could never get sick of you 😂❤️

yourusername you’re too sweet baby 🕺💋

evanpetersfan OMG THEY CONFIRMED IT

y/n_updates OMGGG

mrspeters IM SICK OMG 😭💔💔💔

y/n_and_evan_updates THEYRE SO CUTE IM FREAKING OUT

y/n_ismywife can’t believe evan peters took my girl 💔

mrspeters you make it sound as if evan isn’t all that when in reality he could do so much better than y/n

y/n_ismywife @/mrspeters it was a joke 💔

y/n_l/n_pics @/mrspeters girl if you don’t-🌚

y/n_and_evan_updates no guys I’ve literally been waiting for this

y/n_and_evan_updates MOM AND DAD 😭 ADOPT ME PLEASE

tate_langdon_defender SHES GETTING THAT D EVERYDAY SHES GETTING THAT D EVERYDAY SHES GETTING THAT D EVERYDAY 😖💔

evanpetersrecent his face in the 2nd pic 😭😭

****

taglist: @yes-divine-ruler @v-love @soaringcloud @laynna-mcknight @dewberryobssesed @demxnicprxncess @hxney-lemcn @champ1onsgirl @kitwalkersgfff @lollipopd @stilespeters @fand0mh03

let me know if you’d like to be added/removed from/to my taglist :)

reblogs are greatly appreciated :)

see ya soon pookies 💋

#evan peters #fic recs #evan peters fanfic #tumblr mutuals #evan peters smut #screaming crying moaning throwing up #evan peters x reader #kai anderson #evan peters requests #evan peters social media au #evan peters insta au #insta au #social media au #evan peters fluff #evan peters imagine #evan peters x female reader #evan peters recent

377 notes · View notes

coddlefish · 29 days

Text

Goooooooood morning ☀️🏞😄 Playboy Bunnys 😜😜🐰🎉🐇👯‍♀️👅 Today 🗓 is EASTER 🐰🥚 and its time 🕕🕘 to HOP🏃‍♂️over to DADDY’s 😍⛪️CHURCH😛✝️😌🙏 get on ur KNEES🧎🏼🦵 and BEG 🙏😫 for MERCY 😨🥵😫📿😰😩✝️ Did u kno 🧠🧐🤔😉😼 2024 Yrs ago 🗓🔙 Jesus ✝️👩🏻 DIED💀😵😭 and it took him 2️⃣ Hole 🕳 DAYS 📆📆 to respawn… ⏱ Stupid lag 🙄😒 BUT then we 👯‍♀️🌏👯‍♀️ were all SAVED 🦸🏻‍♂️😌🙏🎉🤠 by his big RES-ERECTION 😳⬆️☁️👀👅🍆😏 Since then jesus’s 💒 Church Sanctioned Fursona™ 👀🙏🛐🙊 aka the Easter Bunny 🐰🐇😉 cums ➡️🌏💦 every 🗓 year and U know what bunnys do best… 😏🥚🍑👶👶👶👶 He gonna DROP ⬇️ his 🐤 BABY C🅾️CK🥚🐣 in ur lil pink basket👜😩 til its OVERFLOWING 🤤😫🥚 with his Rainbow Eggs 🏳️‍🌈🤤🥚🍳😫 Send this 💌 this to 1️⃣0️⃣ of ur 🔥👯‍♀️ Baddest Bunnies🐰😈 If u get 🔟 back ur gettin ur 🍬 candy 🍭licked 👅😉🤤💦 Get 5️⃣ back ur a ROTTEN EGG 🥚👃🤢😰 get 0️⃣ back and u wont get a single Peep🐣👁🚫🙅‍♀️ at that BUNNY D 🐇🍆❌😭😫😓😪😣😰😥😔

25 notes · View notes

progsuggestion · 10 months

Text

The car's 🚘 on fire 🔥😱😱 and there's no 🚫 driver 🫥 at the wheel 🛞

And the sewers 💩🤢 are all muddied 🥴 with a thousand 💯 lonely suicides 😔🪦⚰️

And a dark wind blows 💨😨🥶

The government 🏛️⚖️ is corrupt ‼️💲💲👿 and we're on so many 🤤 drugs 💊💊💊💉💉

With the radio 📻 on 🔛🎶🎵 and the curtains drawn 🫥🫥

We're trapped ‼️‼️in the belly 🤤 of this horrible machine 🤖😱🙀 and the machine 🤖🤖 is bleeding 💉🩸 to death ☠️⚰️🪦

The sun 🌞☀️ has fallen down 🫡😢 🌙 and the billboards 🏙️ are all 😶 leering 🌚👀👁️

And the flags 🇺🇲🇺🇲🫡 are all dead ⁉️ at the top of their poles 😭⚰️💀

It 👏went 👏like 👏this 👏 ☝️☝️

👉the buildings 🌇🏥🏦🏫 toppled in 💥🤯 on themselves 🏚️🏚️

👉 mothers 😘🤤 clutching 🤰👩‍👧babies 🤱🍼👶 picked through the rubble 🪨🏚️🧱 and pulled out💇‍♀️😱their hair 👴😭

The skyline 🌇 was beautiful 😮😍 on fire 💥🔥👨‍🚒

All twisted 🌀😵‍💫 metal 🎸 stretching upwards☝️🆙⬆️

🤯Everything washed 🧼🧽 in a thin orange 🟧🟠haze 🌫️☁️

I said 🗨️kiss me ‼️😘😳 you're beautiful 🥰🥵 these are 👏truly 💯 the last days 🗓️🗓️⌚🗨️

🫵you grabbed ✊ my hand 🤝 and we fell 😯 into it ⁉️like a daydream 💭💤😪 or a fever 🥵🌡️🤒

We woke🛌⏰😯 up🆙 one morning 🥱🌄 and fell 🤕a little 🤏further down 👇⬇️

For sure 🤓as the valley 🏞️of death ☠️⚰️

I open 🔓 my wallet 💲💳💵📂 and it's full 🙀😱 of blood 💉🩸

#godspeed you! black emperor #gybe #gy!be #f sharp a sharp infinity #the dead flag blues

103 notes · View notes

rorygillmore911 · 7 months

Text

Pov: your Instagram when dating spencer Reid part 2

Liked by Kristy_Simmons, derekm and 173 others

(y/n) "i think they make me look cool" -the biggest nerd of all time

View all 17 comments

spencerreid1 Firstly, I'm not THAT big of a nerd. Secondly, they do and I stand by that.

-> (y/n) ofc you do baby but i can't lie to you and say i'm wrong

-> derekm Anything you say pretty boy

-> emilyprenty spencer stop typing like an english teacher

-> (y/n) @/emilyprenty AHAHAHAHAHHA

-> spencerreid1 @/(y/n) :(

paparossi are those mine???

-> (y/n) no....

-> spencerreid1 y/n did it

-> (y/n) @/spencerreid1 WTH SNITCH

Liked by princesspennyg, alexblake, and 203 others

(y/n) Penelope's Halloween party got lit asf ‼️

View all 25 comments

princesspennyg seems like i was successful in my goal of getting boy wonder drunk 😌

-> (y/n) yeah thanks for that

-> spencerreid1 That was your GOAL?!

-> princesspennyg you have a serious stick up your butt sometimes 🙄

-> (y/n) tell me about it

AaronHotchner I'm so glad Jack wasn't around to see this

-> jjareau Don't worry there was a kiddy table for the boys so he could've come 🤷🏼‍♀️

-> princesspennyg i always think ahead 😇

-> (y/n) We're all great babysitters

-> AaronHotchner Not when you're all intoxicated

Liked by jjareau, paparossi and 193 others

(y/n) He bought me a pair so we could match 🤭

View all 13 comments

spencerreid1 It's only fair 🤷

-> (y/n) 🤍

derekm You guys are such dorks it's sickening

-> emilyprenty says the married man

-> (y/n) do i need to tag Sav??

-> paparossi the drama

-> derekm I take it back 🙄

emilyprenty that's cute and all but WHAT KIND OF SOCK IS HE WEARING

-> spencerreid1 They're stylish, Emily, leave me alone.

-> princesspennyg yknow i gave those to him 🥳

-> emilyprenty @/princesspennyg in that case then theyre great (i'm lying)

-> (y/n) it doesn't take a profiler to figure that out -> spencerreid1 You all suck.

Liked by dr.taralewis, elle.greenaslay and 231 others

(y/n) the loml (plus spencer)

View all 21 comments

emilyprenty i miss you sugarplum 😔

-> (y/n) @/emilyprenty i miss you more pookie bear 😪

-> spencerreid1 ???

-> jjareau how romantic

-> AaronHotchner Don't make me get PDA in here

-> spencerreid1 ⁉️⁉️⁉️

-> emilyprenty i took your bitch hoe

paparossi LOL

-> (y/n) thank you for your blessing

-> paparossi anytime

#criminal minds x reader #spencer reid criminal minds #spencer reid x y/n #alittle y/n x emily #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds characters

26 notes · View notes

jfrank204 · 4 months

Text

FBI Flies - Bloodline detectives

12/28/2023. 10 00 p.m.

This week Angel reese was smack in the face, and something called sexually assaulted her in her between the legs, and a pussy 🕳 ⛳️ 🕳 on her ✅️ ↔️ 👉 🔛 ➡️ 🤜 ✅️ right 🦵 🦿 🍗 🦵 legs after he was told buy his conspicuous judge faith Jenkins that Angel reese was thesis.

Yes, this old man is also known as "April " or some commentator, and many other this you need two know like he's a 🐒 🙈 🙊 🐵 🙉 🐒 in a sheen forever experiment also known as he got her in the house down south while he gets money 💰 🤑 💸 😉 🙄 😜 💰 of course. These sick people were transferred to the USA 🇺🇸 😒 🙄 😪 🤧 😕 🇺🇸 right ✅️ next to Texas.

Angel reese is also told many things buy this sick man 👨 😢 🤧 😪 😔 😞 👨 like when she she her father don't give him ♥️ 💔 😢 🎶 ❤️ 😔 ♥️ nothing right before he bashes her with head also known as sucking ♥️ 😢 ❤️ 💔 😉 😄 ♥️ his dick. 😇 👼 😇 👼 😇 Angel reese was also told the I ❤️ 😍 💖 ❣️ 💕 💘 ❤️ thing. Angel reese was beat 💓 🤧 🔥 🎶 ✨️ 😍 💓 up bad after that ♥️ ❤️ 💔 💕 💖 💗 ♥️ old ♥️ ❤️ 💖 🎶 💕 💗 ♥️ man went two New ♥️ ❤️ 💖 💙 💕 💗 ♥️ york 🏬 ♥️ ❤️ 💖 💙 💕 🏬 City to the hot 🔥 🥵 ❤️ 💖 💙 ♥️ 🔥 97 radio 📻 ❤️ 💙 💖 ♥️ 💕 📻 ❤️ station 🚉 ♥️ ❤️ 💖 💕 💗 🚉 for some 👄 🦜 🗣 👄 👄 🗣 👄 🗣 talking interview after his interview ❤️ 💖 💙 ♥️ 💕 💗 ❤️ on the 📱 📲 ☎️ 📞 📳 🤳 📱 phone from his 👋 ❤️ 💙 💖 ♥️ 💕 👋 down spouts. Yes, the bum brought Angel 😇 😍 😌 💕 ☺️ 🤧 😇 reese to that radio station 🚉 ♥️ ❤️ 💔 💕 💖 🚉 which means she is the new 🔫 gun buster called ♥️ the bloods.

The word in the streets is that Angel reese is nothing but a sick thete for a ride for someone else from New York city to the dunkin donuts 🍩 💔 😪 😔 🎶 😕 🍩 in the bronx New York 10463 in the USA 🇺🇸 ♥️ ❤️ 💔 💖 💕 🇺🇸 ♥️ ❤️ across the street from the Best Short Stop In The World's Association office New 🏬 york City as a terrorist ♥️ of course ♥️ 📞 📲 🤙 ☎️ 📵 📞 called ♥️ blood also known as Angel reese ♥️ set up buy all. ♥️ On bouban Street, that old man 👴 🧓 👨 👌 😴 😪 👴 got Angel reese shot when they took her down South USA 🇺🇸 buy doing a mafia play to her then woke her back up in a hospital 🏥 ❤️ 💙 😀 ♥️ to New york 💙 city to the radio 📻 station 🚉 mentioned above. This old man even spits on her and her sisters excessively before he sex.

FBI Flies - star track 👣

12/29/2023 12 00a.m.

The old man 👴 🧓 👨 😪 😕 😒 👴 mentioned above resurfaced in the carribbean islands 🏝 that islands exactly 💯 😳 😀 👌 😄 👍 💯 where that old man was with another pervert murderer p2bcalled kiki rice 🍚 who went begging in that same hotel that old man for one, and something called food. When that old man said no suck my dick for it to kiki rice I'm not gonna lie but she got on her knees with the most evil look on her face called she was hit with black, and magic . This old man even takes them lost girls to their fatamina island 🏝 to do sex with them in each different account and with a pervert.

The old man is a routine begger as he gets drunk and then walks the streets meeting pedestrians that need him in his court for some of their cash. For taking her pants 👖 down in Ohio/ back to the Angel 😇 💕 ❤️ ✨️ 😍 💖 😇 reese girl for that old man p2.

This 🎮 🥌 🏑 🎲 🎴 🏀 🎮 old man in the pictures above in the book he did with Jonathan Fred Rivera with the baby thing in the picture no matter what father steops up to tell you the truth that said to

Outside one night in the Midwest USA 🇺🇸 right outside his house that he killed Jonathan Fred Rivera, and all he wanted to do was get Angel home 🏡 to him for chirstmas. So the Commentator asks the old man if he would do that the old man replied yes. The old man told that Commentator all he wanted to do was get Angel 😇 🤧 😔 😪 😌 😢 😇, and her knew boyfriend Joseph ortiz from Lakewood New jersey 🇯🇪 together ❤️ to the best short stop in the world Association office 🏬 New York City to Jonathan Fred Rivera. For what said the Commentator to the old man the old man said for the I don't know.

#the bloodline #Spotify #star trak

14 notes · View notes

ugotcooneycrossed · 10 months

Text

the one that got away😭😪

come back to me baby😔😔😔

30 notes · View notes

ronance4everbrainrot · 2 years

Text

Stranger things incorrect quote generator (feat. The Sapphic senate, The party, the Byers-Hopper family, Scoops Troop and random shit 👌)

Pt 4

Sapphic Senate

Chrissy: H-how do you ask someone out?

Robin: Well, first-

Nancy: Don't ask them, they asked me out in a McDonalds parking lot.

Chrissy: ...And you said yes?

(ofc she did, to both Robin and Nancy)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Chrissy, planning a group disguise: You cannot be Blake Bortles.

Robin: Fine! Then I’ll be Jake-

Nancy, under their breath: Don’t say Jortles.

Robin: Jortles! And I work at the molotov cocktail department.

(Molotov Cocktail let's go 😩)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Chrissy: HYDRATE OR DIE-DRATE!

Chrissy: *aggressively throws water bottles*

Vickie: Uh... what's up with them?

Robin: They're trying to yell mental health and wellbeing into us.

Chrissy: I APPRECIATE ALL OF YOU!

Nancy, crying: It's working.

(Nancy needed that 😪)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: Chrissy you can’t move in with Robin.

Chrissy: Why not?

Nancy: Well, um, how are you going to feel when they see you without any makeup?

Chrissy: I’m not wearing makeup right now.

Nancy: Holy crap, you’re beautiful.

(Nancy was jealous at first, also yes she is 🥺✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: You’re just being paranoid. Again.

Robin: When have I been paranoid?

Nancy: Um, when you first met Vickie you thought they were an undercover cop…?

Robin: No one has a wart that big, I thought it was a surveillance camera!

Nancy: And last year you were sure Chrissy was a mermaid!

Robin: They hate wearing shirts! COINCIDENCE?!

*Later, when Robin’s theory is proven wrong*

Nancy: Do you have anything to say for yourself?

Robin: I still think Chrissy is a mermaid.

(She probably is tho 👀 *gasp* Mystical Creature AU or smth and Chrissy is a mermaid 👍)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Vickie: Did you buy eggs like I asked?

Chrissy: Even better!

Vickie: What the fuck did you-

Chrissy: *holding up a chicken* Her name is Fluffy.

(She 100% brought a cow once too for the milk)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: If you water water, it grows.

Chrissy: ...What.

Vickie: They've got a point.

(she does)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Vickie: I’m in love with you.

Chrissy: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.

Vickie: I know.

Chrissy: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

(They definitely had a prank war)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

*The squad is playing a team sport*

Nancy: Are you upset you don’t get to be on the same team as Chrissy?

Vickie: Have you ever played a game with Chrissy?

Nancy: No…

Chrissy: Have you ever been trapped in a cage with a wolverine?

*Meanwhile, on the other side of the field*

Chrissy, chasing Robin: I SAID FASTER! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORD “FASTER” MEANS? IT MEANS MORE FAST!!!!

(leave Robin alone! She said it took her 6 months longer to walk than other babies!)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: We call that a traumatic experience.

Nancy, turning to Robin: Not a "bruh moment".

Nancy, turning to Vickie: Not "sadge".

Nancy, turning to Chrissy: And DEFINITELY not an "oof LMAO".

(these fit perfectly)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Vickie: I like to play this game called nap roulette. I take a nap and don’t set an alarm. Will it be 20 min or 4 hours? Nobody knows. It’s risky and I like it.

(that's her personality right there and I love it)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: Why are you late?

Nancy: A technical error occurred, causing an unexpectedly long bout of unconsciousness.

Robin: Overslept?

Nancy: Overslept.

(Vickie is like "That's why I don't set alarms" or smth) 😌

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: You can't wake up if you never got to sleep.

(Robin, go to sleep, pls😪)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: Make no mistake. Not only am I party rocking, but I am also in the house tonight.

Vickie: But are you shuffling?

Robin: Everyday.

Nancy: What language are you two speaking??

(Robin and Vickie are just Vibin' ✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: I feel like everyone on this island is suspicious, Robin. Except you!

Robin: But Nancy, I think you're suspicious!

Nancy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

(Oof, heartbroken 💔 such betrayal 😔)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Chrissy: Be right back, gonna hit the toilet for a quick power sob.

(too soon?)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: Vickie taught me to think before I act.

Nancy: ...So if I smack the shit out of you, rest assured that I thought about it and am confident in my decision.

(That's one of the differences between the Responsible Sapphics here)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: How late were you up last night?

Chrissy & Robin, in tandem: Me?

Nancy: No, not you two. You stay up late all the time.

Nancy, to Vickie: You.

(because of all nap roulette lol)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: Thought I was meowing back at my cat for the past hour, but it was just me and Robin meowing at each other from different rooms in the house.

(So Robin started it is how I read it)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: Why are you burning our marriage certificate!?

Robin: Good luck trying to return me without a receipt.

(I feel like Nancy has made a copy of it, she somehow knew that something was gonna happen)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: I love saying 'fuck me' because it can either be sexual or self-loathing and those are two things that describe me perfectly.

(Chrissy and Vickie would say something about how Nancy will or 'i don't wanna get on Nancy's bad side' or just 'no thanks' idk about Nancy tho I'm torn between either 'gladly' or her getting flustered)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Chrissy: *pulls back the curtain while Nancy is showering*

Chrissy: Hey did we - stop screaming it’s me - did we run out of Cheerios?

(Chrissy does it to everyone, stay safe 😬)

Bonus:

Robin running into the bathroom: I heard screaming what's wro- *faints*

Nancy: *concerned* Robin!?

Chrissy: *confused* I thought she already saw you naked?

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: *watching their house burn down*

Robin:

Robin: *starts filming* Waddup, guys, welcome to my vlog, today's topic: how to get away with accidentally committing arson because you forgot Spaghetti O's cans are metal and thus non-microwavable! Step one: deny everything.

(this was the start of them going to be Roommates 👍)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy, washing the dishes: Who the fuck used this pan??

Nancy: Wait. I the fuck used this pan…

Robin: It was you the fuck.

Nancy: It was I the fuck…

Vickie: Who cooks rice in a pan?

Robin: They the fuck.

(I just loved that 'I the fuck' 😂)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Vickie, singing to the tune of I Kissed a Girl: I killed a guy, and I liked it-

Robin, whispering: Should we call the exorcist?

Chrissy, also singing: The taste of his cherry chapstick.

Nancy, appalled: Call the exorcist.

(Perfection)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: Like they say, "If you can't beat them, curl up in a ball and protect your organs."

(I- this reminds me of a ronance fic I read damn)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy, at the slightest provocation: I came into this earth screaming and covered in someone else's blood and and I'm not afraid to leave the same way.

(Don't make her your enemy)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: *raises eyebrows*

Robin: Put those back down!

(is she surprised or why she raising her brows?)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: Your lover doesn't have the mental strength to caramelize onions.

Chrissy: Your lover thinks it takes 5-10 minutes to caramelize onions.

Vickie: Who's fucking caramelizing onions? Have you sociopaths forgotten that apples exist?

Robin: Do you think caramelizing onions is putting caramel on onions.

(I don't understand what is going on)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Chrissy: Milfs.

Vickie: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.

Robin: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???

Nancy: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties.

Nancy: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.

Vickie: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.

Robin: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—

Robin: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

Nancy: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?

Chrissy: What? No! It isn't!

Nancy: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

Vickie: Nancy...

Nancy: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

Vickie: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.

Nancy: ROBIN, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

Robin: The word milf has been ruined for me.

Chrissy: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

Vickie: Y'all are dumbasses.

(Chrissy and Vickie definitely call Karen a milf (in front of Nancy sometimes) and were surprised they didn't die lol)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: I have yet to encounter a problem where a sword didn't factor into the solution at least in some way.

(let👏Robin👏have👏a👏sword👏)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[The Byers-Hopper Family]

Hopper: How many children do you have?

Joyce: Biologically, legally, or emotionally? Because there is a difference.

(She is everyones mother, like Steve but an actual mom)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

El, reading a recipe: Beat three eggs?

Hopper: It means like in hand-to-hand combat.

El: Ohhhh-

Joyce: Both of you get out of this kitchen.

(Canon)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Will: I’m sad.

Jonathan : Don’t be sad, because sad backwards is das.

Jonathan : And das not good.

(This is literally the S2 scene, I love Jonathan being a good brother✨✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Will: You’ve got to learn to love yourself.

Hopper: But don't you hate yourself.

Will: Yeah, but this is about you. Stay focused.

(will 😔)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Hopper: What is this!?

Joyce: That’s the weight of guilt. Give in to the nice side. Help those unfortunate, and make the guilt go away, my friend.

Hopper: Ow! Make it stop!

Joyce: Surrender to your kindness, Hopper. It’s nice to be nice.

Hopper: Your guilt is strong, my friend. But it is no match for the power of my selfishness!

(S1 or smth idk)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Joyce: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?

Hopper: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.

Will: Three of us saw it, Hopper. How do you explain that?

Hopper: *points at El* Sleep deprivation. *points at Will* Paranoia. *points at Jonathan * Delusional personality disorder.

(best family trip ever 👍)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Hopper: Yes, I'm adopting Will and you cowards can't tell me no!

(I had it once with El but I forgot to copy paste it, but this is cute too🥺)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

El: *eating a cinnamon roll*

Hopper: Cannibalism.

El: *confused chewing noises*

(Looks like a cinnamon roll, could kill you)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Joyce: I mean, sure, I have my bad days, but then I remember what a cute smile I have.

(yes, you have a cute smile 🥺)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Joyce: Why do you think I don’t like you? I do. I would kill for you.

Joyce: Ask me to kill for you.

Hopper: ...First of all, calm down-

(She kinda wouldn't but also would 🤔)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

*The gang's thoughts on stabbing*

Jonathan : Would never stab anyone.

Joyce: Would stab someone in retaliation.

Will: Yells "I won't hesitate, bitch!" first.

Hopper: Would stab without warning.

El: Would stab as a warning.

(I feel like it couldn't fit better, maybe Joyce and Jonathan switch ig)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Hopper walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: Joyce, I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK.

Joyce, sipping coffee happily: I love you too :)

(apparently the generator loves jopper, lots of good Jopper quotes. love them)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Will: ...This is one of those moments where it doesn't really matter what I have to say, isn't it?

(this sums up S3 and S4 👍)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Joyce: I don’t even use tubberware anymore.

Hopper: What are you saying? Say it again.

Joyce: Tubberware.

Hopper: Say it again. Slow.

Joyce: Tubberware.

Hopper: Slow, very slow - actually, say the first syllable.

Joyce: Tub.

Hopper: Wrong.

Joyce: What do you mean, wrong?

Hopper: I thought I caught that. You’re saying tub. It’s P.

Joyce: What are you talking about?

Hopper: Tupperware. Tupper.

Joyce: It’s tupper!

Hopper: It’s tupper, always has been, always will be.

Joyce: I thought it was tubberware because it kind of looks like a tub.

(I love you Joyce✨❤️)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[The Party]

Max: El kissed me!

Lucas: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!

Max: It was unbelievable!

Lucas: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!

Will: Okay, we wanna hear everything. Lucas, get the wine and unplug the phone. Max, does this end well or do we need tissues?

Max: Oh, it ended very well.

Lucas: Do not start without me! Do not start without me!

Will: Okay, alright, let’s hear about the kiss. Was it a soft brush against your lips or was it like a, you know, “I gotta have you now” kind of thing?

Max: Well, at first it was really intense, you know? And then, oh God, and then we just sort of sunk into it.

Will: Ohh... So, okay, were they holding you? Or were their hands on your back?

Max: First they started out on my waist and then they slid up and then they were in my hair.

Lucas and Will: Ohhh.

*meanwhile*

El eating pizza in their house: And, uh, and then I kissed them.

Mike: Tongue?

El: Yeah.

Dustin: Cool.

(this was the first thing of them combined and I love it 😂✨ #Elmax also the groups 👌)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

El: Why does everyone want to kill Mike?

Max: Because, goddamnit, have you seen them? Their neck looks so snappable.

(the best of frenemies ✨🥺)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

El: Where have you been all day?

Mike: Oh, just dealing with things way beyond my maturity level.

(accurate)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max, opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.

(Her Moms are watching her 👀 so she can't drink alcohol)

Bonus: (also from the generator)

Max: I drink to forget but I always remember.

Lucas: You're drinking orange juice.

(well she just said drink, she didn't say what she drank 👀)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

El: So, Mike, do you have a crush on anyone?

Mike: The only crush I have is this crushing anxiety

Bonus

El:

Mike: Also Will

(Byler is canon ig)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Lucas: I hope you have an explanation for this.

Mike: We have three actually-

Will: Pick your favorite.

(Lucas catching Mike cheating or what is going on?👀)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Teacher: Your child was in a fight.

Mike: Oh no, that’s terrible!

Will: Did they win?

(Honestly, I feel like this fits, also set in the future ofc)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin: A party is a celebration of a life, bringing people together to let the guest of honor know how much they’re loved. Will has done so much for us. This is our chance to do something for them.

Mike: By forcing them to have fun at a party that they don’t want to be at?

Dustin: I knew you’d understand.

(Will doesn't want a party and Mike is trying to stopped them from throwing one)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin: Time sensitive question how to flirt with boy.

Will: Throw rocks at him.

Mike: Hot Dogs.

Max: Kill him.

Dustin: Thanks guys.

(maybe max killed Lucas and that's why he isn't here 👀)

Bonus:

Mike: You're way of annoying me is the same way you are flirting?

Will:

Max: is he serious?

Dustin: omg

Mike: what?

Will shaking his head: How oblivious can a person be 😪

Also Will obliviously eating the Hot Dog Mike gave him:

Max: They are both idiots

Dustin: yeah

(i feel like will wouldn't be oblivious tho, just not believing that Mike likes him back)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Mike: Just a minute. I need to go take out the trash.

Will: Oh. We're going out?

Mike: Wh...

(Will no)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin: Goddamn it, the printer broke while printing out Max's birthday invitations.

Lucas: Well, what are they supposed to say?

Dustin: "Max's birthday".

Lucas: So, what do they say instead?

Dustin: "Max’s bi".

Lucas:

Lucas: Works out either way.

(I love that it's Lucas saying that)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Mike: Do you ever get pre-annoyed? Like you already know someone is going to piss you off?

Lucas: What? No, I—

Max: *enters room*

Mike: *jaw clenches*

(✨🥺Frenemies🥺✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Will: There are three ways to handle a difficult situation. The right way, the wrong way, and the Mike way.

El: Isn't that the wrong way?

Will: Yes, but it's faster.

(affectionately)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Will: Regular soda is too sweet!

El: Diet soda has a weird after taste!

Will: No! Ugh, oh my god. Diet soda is THE BEST! It doesn't have sugar! It's SPICY!

El: It has other weird stuff in it! I'll take REGULAR sugar in my REGULAR soda!

Will: It's SO SWEET like it's a dessert though! Diet feels more like a drink!

El: I'm going to physically attack you.

Will: Which is better, Mike?

Mike: Oh, I usually drink water!

El: Wha- NO!

Will: DISGUSTING!

(i love this so much)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Mike: So, did everyone learn their lesson?

El: No.

Will: I did not.

Max: I may have actually forgotten one.

Dustin: Also no.

Mike: Oh good, neither did I.

Lucas: *Exhausted sigh*

(Lucas is so done lol)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

*Max is telling a story*

Lucas: Wow, Max, this story has everything! Action! Adventure! Romance!

Will: Romance?

Lucas: I have a crush on them.

(That's adorable, he's such a dork)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Will, looking over Max’s shoulder: You can draw?

Max, stopping what they were doing: You can speak?

(I feel like this is canon lol)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: Watcha doin?

Dustin: Stealing my neighbour’s cat.

Max: Scandalous.

Max: Can I help?

(Rip mews 😔)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: FUCK THE CHAIR. PARDON ME FOR MAKING MYSELF COMFORTABLE DURING A SINCERE HEART TO HEART DISCUSSION WITH A DEAR FRIEND IN NEED!

Max: BUT THE TIME HAS COME FOR ME TO CEASE STRADDLING THIS DEEPLY OFFENSIVE PIECE OF FURNITURE! AWAY WITH YE, FOUR LEGGED TEMPTRESS! DISTRACT US NO MORE WITH THE MOST BASIC AND UTILITARIAN FORM OF COMFORT YOU SUPPLY!

Dustin: Max just threw a tantrum about a chair.

Dustin: I just won Max Tantrum Bingo.

(Ginger snaps 😬)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: I hate taking off my glasses, because without them, my vision goes from Full HD all the way down to buffering at 240p and I just can't handle that.

(if she still has her vision it would definitely be fucked so yes, also I relate so much)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin: HYDRATE OR DIE-DRATE!

Dustin: *aggressively throws water bottles*

Mike: Uh... what's up with them?

Will: They're trying to yell mental health and wellbeing into us.

Dustin: I APPRECIATE ALL OF YOU!

El, crying: It's working.

(naww, El 🥺)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin: Who wants to make fifty bucks?

Mike: How?

Dustin: I need someone to take the fall.

Mike: What did you do?

Dustin: I can't tell you. Yes or no, no questions asked.

Will, from the other room: Oh my god.

Dustin: ...

Will: OH MY GOD!

Mike: Make it a hundred.

Dustin: Deal.

(Dustin probably did something with one of his drawings.. And because Will is kinda a simp he'd not be that hard on Mike)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

El: I'm not doing to well.

Dustin: What's wrong?

El: I have this headache that comes and goes.

*Max enters the room*

El: There it is again.

(S2 Elmax)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin: El is not a morning person. Or a night person. There’s really only about seven minutes a day you are fun to be around.

El: The best part is you never know when they’re coming.

(I just love this cause 7/11...)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin: You have an impressive pain tolerance.

Will: Thanks, it's the trauma.

(well, there is more trauma coming, honey)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Mike: How petty can you get?

Dustin: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

(I wonder who he argued with)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: If any person here knows of any just cause or impediment why these two should not be joined together in holy matrimony, let them speak now or forever hold their peace.

Will: Yes! I do. One of the partners is already married! They married me three years ago. And don’t let them deny it! I’ve got the marriage certificate to prove it!

*Dustin turns around to face them*

Will: Oh... sorry. Wrong church.

(He meant to go to M*leven's wedding)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

*In the chip aisle at Walmart, doing a late-night grocery run.*

El: *Minding their own business, looking for Eggos*

El: *Finds Eggos.*

Max, to Dustin: See, they know what they're here for. They know what they're doing. Be more like them. Make a decision, Dustin!

(I just found it funny and change the other thing to eggos, and Max is also just admiring El)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

El: WHY DID YOU KILL HIM?! HE COULD HAVE HAD HOPES AND DREAMS, HE COULD HAVE HAD A FAMILY!!!

Max: El-

Max: It- it was just an ant-

(oop)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: Here you go, El, a nice hot cup of coffee!

El: It's cold.

Max: A nice cup of coffee.

El: It's horrible!

Max: Cup of coffee.

El: I'm not sure if this even IS coffee.

Max: C U P.

(S2, Max trying to be nice to El)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[S1]

Lucas: Start talking!

El: Well, I-

Lucas: Shut up!

(good old days)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Lucas: I’m going to hell.

Max: Probably.

Lucas: I'll pick you up?

Max: *nodding* Carpool

(Lucas could never go to Hell ✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Will: Hi.

Lucas: Hey, did you do what I said? Did you tell them?

Will: I did.

Lucas: And what did they say?

Will: “Thank you.”

Lucas: You’re totally welcome. What’d they say?

Will: They said, “Thank you.” I said “I love you” and Mike said, “Thank you.”

(S5 basically?.. Also Lucas 🥺✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Lucas: If I stay in bed I'll be warm. If I get in the shower, I'll also be warm. But the distance between the bed and shower? No. That is not warm.

(such a dork)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: Since we're in a relationship now, your clothes are my clothes too. Don't ask me why I have your shirt on, this is our shirt.

Lucas: Fine, but when I come strutting in with your fuzzy socks I don't want to hear shit.

(The question is, does max have fuzzy socks? 👀)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: I'm so tired of this life. I want to be a roomba. I want knives taped to me. And I want to be set loose.

(just gonna let it stand there)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Max: You seem familiar... have I threatened you before?

(no, but I wouldn't mind- I mean what?)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

El: When I see initials carved into a tree with a heart I think it’s so romantic. Two lovers on a date... one of them carrying a knife for some reason.

(Imaging Mike making one for him and El and El still using it but for Elmax)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin: Say no to drugs.

Dustin: Say yes to drugs.

Dustin: It doesn't matter if you say yes or no to drugs, cause if you're talking to drugs... then you're on drugs.

(he and Robin are smart)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin, after getting a library card: Now I know what true power feels like.

(Now you know 🌠)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Will: I honestly feel like some of our conversations here are almost word-for-word accurate to the generator.

Lucas: Yup.

El: Maybe the generator is watching us.

Will: Wouldn't that imply this conversation will be added?

Will: ...

Will: Wait—

(I love the fourth wall break 😭❤️❤️. Also yes, some are very accurate!)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[Scoops Troop]

Steve: Are you ever going to listen to me?

Erica: Yes. Absolutely.

Steve: When?

Erica: When you're right.

(She ate and left no crumps)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: When you've been on the internet for as long as I have, you develop thick skin.

Erica: Navy blue isn't your color.

Robin: Navy blue brings out my eyes you prick! *Chases after Erica*

(She looked amazing in her uniform 😌, how dare you insult her Erica 👀)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: What’s the straightest thing you’ve ever done?

Russians: *sighs*

Russians: I killed a man.

(I added Russians and this is the only good one)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Dustin: *sees someone doing something stupid*

Dustin: What an idiot.

Dustin: *realizes it's Steve*

Dustin: Wait, that's MY idiot!

(Canon)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: The first time Steve opened a box of Cheerios and looked inside they yelled, "OH WOW! DONUT SEEDS!"

(he's a dingus)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Steve: Question. When they shot Bambi's mother, did you find that a sad moment...at all?

Robin: I'm sure she's mounted on a nice wall in a fine home somewhere.

(well Damn)

Bonus:

Steve: First the spider thing now this. What is wrong with you.

(It feels accurate)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Steve: Don’t go picking a fight with me. I could make your life difficult.

Robin, sarcastically: Wow. I wonder what it’d be like to have a difficult life.

(Robin angst let's go ✨)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[The Almost and Adult adults]

Steve: Have you done this before?

Robin: Well, Steve, it's like if you read the script you come better prepared.

Joyce: That's not what we do in the US, we don't read things.

Steve: I don't read, Robin.

(Waddup I'm Steve, 19, and never fucking learned how to read)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Jonathan : I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan.

Murray: We could attack them with hummus.

Jonathan : I stand corrected.

Murray: Just keeping things in perspective.

(good idea)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Hopper: What? I'm not aggressive!

Murray: Last Tuesday, you wacked me with a pair of crocs and stole my chocolate chips?

Hopper: Survival of the fittest, bitch.

(You kinda are tho 👀)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Hopper: Where is Enzo?

Joyce: I'll do you one better, who is Enzo??

Russians: Here's a better question, why is Enzo?

(Omg wait another Russians one and it's perfect lol. Also I know his name is not Enzo)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Murray: When do you usually go to sleep?

Jonathan : Whenever I collapse is entirely up to the gods.

(yuh)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Jonathan : What situation is not instantly improved by the addition of fishnets, I ask you.

Robin: Being a fish.

Jonathan : Well, shit.

(I want them to be friends)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Hopper: I really like Eminem.

Jonathan : I prefer skittles.

Joyce: They are talking about the rapper.

Jonathan : Why would they eat the wrapper?

(Jonathan is high)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: You don't think I can fight because of my gender!

Joyce: I don't think you can fight because you're in a wedding dress. For what it's worth, I don't think Murray can fight in that dress either.

Murray: Perhaps not. But I would make a radiant bride.

(yes you would! AAAH, Canon 😭❤️)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Jonathan : Hey, are you okay?

Robin: Yeah.

Jonathan : You don't look okay...

Robin: Then stop looking.

(S3 interaction)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Steve: If I say I love you, will you say it back?

Nancy: Yes.

Steve: I love you.

Nancy: It back.

*Later*

Murray: Why is Steve crying face-down on the floor?

(Yes yes, perfect, I love it, Canon, let's go, Good game Nance! He should have seen it coming, Damn, I love her, gaslight gatekeep girlboss idk)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nancy: Coca Cola can remove rust from metal, imagine what it’s doing to your body.

Robin: Pfff, getting rid of the rust, idiot.

Nancy: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!

Steve: Hmm... I've been drinking soda and my body's rust free... not sure where you're getting your facts from...

(idk if they are high or sober)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Robin: I’ve invited you here because I crave the deadliest game...

Steve, nodding: Knife Monopoly.

Robin: I was actually going to play Russian roulette, but now I'm really interested in whatever knife Monopoly is.

(Russian roulette tho)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Squad reactions to being called straight:

Joyce: The fuck, no I'm not.

Enzo: Excuse the hell out of you?

Jonathan : Ding dong, you are wrong!

Murray: Who told you that? And why did they lie?

Nancy: Rude.

Robin: *punches the person*

(Robin would punch them tho, I feel like she definitely would)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

So um

This was a lot.. Sorry.. Hope you liked it tho!

And um.. Ye.. Lots of Love ✨❤️🥺✨

#stranger things incorrect quotes #inncorrect quotes #max mayfield #stranger things #very long post #joyce byers #idk lmao #lots of love #idk what else to tag #byeeeee #the sapphic senate #chrissy x vickie #Jopper #nancy wheeler #robin buckley #elmax #steve harrington #jonathan byers #ronance

156 notes · View notes