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hypewinter · 1 year

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After Danny exposed Vlad and his corrupt dealings, the older halfa got the last laugh by getting his blacklists from all engineering jobs. Desperate for a job Danny ends up applying for a personal assistant position and he actually gets it. It only takes him a week to see how detached Bruce Wayne is from his own company. AND he has his 16 year old son running it as CEO!? No way is he letting that slide.

#dp x dc #dc x dp #hyper prompts #there's nowhere bruce can go that danny can't find him #his pa is the one person other than alfred that he's actually terrified of #also i imagine the rest of danny's family quickly follows him to gotham #jazz naturally begins working at arkham #a reformed dan opens up a restaurant in crime alley that doubles as a soup kitchen #and ellie helps him out while also doing a bunch of odd jobs around the city #whatever flights her fancy for the day #the bats don't know whether to put them on some sort of supervillain watchlist #or just watch the chaos unfold #it is hilarious seeing bruce squirm though

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sbd-laytall · 5 months

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The true energy of a teenager teaching slang to their grandpa.

Robin II: Joker's Wild (1991) #1

#it's funny to me #for me though it's me with my mom because she's pretty old but I still know enough slang to teach some of it to her #tim drake #robin #alfred pennyworth #robin comics #dc comics #limited series #my post

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treasureplcnet · 6 months

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assorted bodies doodles (transcript of that messy relationship square under the cut due to my handwriting/incoherency)

TAKE THESE W A GRAIN OF SALT i am like 90% joking:

hillinghead -> hasan, and vice versa: immediate mutual respect

hillinghead -> whiteman: he's incredibly smart, deceptively cunning but very kind. but he is also so annoying oh my god--

hillinghead -> maplewood: "please someone explain science fiction to me"

whiteman -> iris, and vice versa: two friends secretly think of the other as the sidekick

whiteman -> hillinghead: annoying him is quickly becoming a favorite pasttime

whiteman -> hasan: will not admit it but he wants parenting tips from her

hasan -> whiteman: has slipped a parenting book to him

hasan -> maplewood: deja vu about their future weirds her out a little, but she trusts her

iris -> hillinghead: fond of him from the time they spoke in the prison. enjoys fucking with him

iris -> hasan: SHE'S THE GOAT

#re: while i like whiteman being a funny comic relief type character in this lineup (less comic relief and more witty and funny)#i do recognise that he's not rly like that in canon. much more cunning and able to blend into whatever situation he can #able to say the right things when he needs to (right after farrell dies) and deflecting of any real observations (with calloway)#its very chameleon like to the point of giving up a very integral part of his identity to safeguard himself--#even though he cares very much about it (the way he reacts to antisemitic comments and his face drops when farrell mentions the synagogue)#now what is actually annoying to hillinghead is that he knows karl can actually be very gracious he's still choosing to fuck with him LOL #the annoyance spreads to iris too. i rly think iris-karl buddy cop duo could be so funny #i actually really need more fic or art of them all interacting . here's how bodies s2 can still happen.#bodies netflix #karl weissman #esther jankovsky #sharara hasan #alfred hillinghead #iris maplewood #and sorry to hillinghead who is not drawn well. kyle soller 1 treasureplcnet 0 #my art #and im not quite sure why theyre having breakfast tgt in that first comic. perhaps bc the original meme has them like that LOL

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puppetmaster13u · 2 months

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You know what I need? I need Batman to be minding his own business, y'know just taking part in a league meeting or being forced to (urgh) socialize. And just in the corner of his eye see one of the batkids start doing something they know they shouldn't, presumably something incredibly dangerous seeing as he gave up on stopping them from hanging from chandeliers and going out as vigilante children. .

And I need him to just suddenly having the thickest new jersey accent the other heroes have ever heard as he fusses over them when they do get hurt.

#batman #dc #bruce wayne #dcu #robin #batkids #batdad #we need to use the fact that gotham is in new jersey more #batfamily #let characters have their local accents dangit #but also let them use it for shenanigans #Dick purposely gets a thick romanian accent whenever someone is being an ass while he's civilian and pretends he doesn't speak english #even though everyone knows he can and has seen proof of it #Also let Bruce get a british accent when he scolds someone thanks to being raised by Alfred #Do you see my vision #do you #batman au #or is it headcanon

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myrddin-wylt · 1 year

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why would yall encourage me??? anyway I made more in-universe hetalia memes.

bonus meme on which I refuse to elaborate

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ekat-fandom-blog · 1 year

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You know what? It would be really funny if, in the middle of the Justice League headquarters, Captain Marvel said "I need an Adult."

None of the present League members know Marvel's actually a child. He isn't in danger. Just wants an actual adult to take over whatever he's doing, because he has no clue.

#billy batson #dc captain marvel #captain marvel dc #shazam #justice league #someone replies “you are an adult”#and he's just like “i need an adultier adult”#everyone tries to get batman #but bat's is like “no”#because he also thinks the situation requires an adultier adult #and he is not one #maybe get alfred #he's the most adult Adult batman knows #they probably go to the kents though #they're more adult than alfred #they would teach the others how to be an adult

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do-you-know-this-queer-character · 2 days

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Do you know this queer character?

Jaskier is Sapioromantic and Pansexual, and uses he/him pronouns!

#hoooo boy okay I found quotes from the actor saying both sapioromantic and pansexual so that's what we're going with #even though the sapioromantic part does not seem to be widely acknowledged in fandom it was mentioned specifically by name #someone also submitted polyamorous but I can't find anything about that so lmk if it's true #jaskier #the witcher #witcher netflix #twn #julian alfred pankratz #tumblr polls #fandom polls #poll #sapioromantic #pansexual #he/him #live action #video game #lgbtqia #do you know this queer character

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flamingpudding · 7 months

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Fictober23 Prompt: 12 - "I am not saying I didn't like it."

Fandom: DPxDC

Rating: T

Warnings: -

Danny grinned at Jason who was sitting across from him on the table. Before the other a plate of… something was placed, accompanied by a cup of tea. Danny's first attempt at cooking. Jason had not managed to escape the Manor in time and had been unlucky enough to come across Danny, Alfred's new assistant / ward entrusted to him from an old 'friend'.

Of course Danny had to have that stupid baby deer and begging eye looks as he pleaded to Jason to please try his cooking and help him work out how to make it better so that he could help out Alfred more in the future. Jason was going to say no but the other teen was very insistent and had an iron grip.

He was pretty sure Danny had cut off his arms blood circulation when he had gotten dragged to the kitchen. Either way he was now presented with something that looked inedible and a tea that smelled heavenly.

"Try it!" Danny smiled brightly and damit, maybe his brothers were right saying he was a good damn pushover. Jason swallowed, looking from Danny's bright eyes down at the plate before him.

"Fuck it…" If it tasted bad he would wash it down with the heavenly smelling tea. He stabbed something on the plate, ignored the fact that he was entirely sure he had seen it wiggle and stuffed it in his mouth, eyes tightly shut.

He waited for the bad taste to impact.

And waited.

But it never game, carefully he opened one eye seeing Danny staring expectantly at him. Carefully he started chewing and his eye widened. Not expecting to taste what he did, Jason stared at the dish before him that he could only describe as the stew of doom.

"Well? How does it taste! Is it as good as Mr. Alfred's stew?"

"How the fuck…" was the only thing Jason was able to say still not believing his taste buds. Stil in disbelief Jason then took a sip of the heavenly smelling tea and promptly spit it out like it had burned his tongue, just not with the temperature but with its taste. He coughed, hitting the table a couple of times. His eyes teared up as he stared at the sheepish teen before him.

"What the fuck, Danny?" He wheezed out, trying to catch his breath after the coughing fit.

"I was sure you were going to like ecto-tea, considering you already have ectoplasm in your system. You didn't appear to mind it in the food."

Jason's eye twitch. "You mixed fucking ectoplasm into this food?"

If Alfred weren't so fond of this boy Jason would have punched him already. Sure Danny was a good damn enigma and when Alfred had introduced them the teen had freaked out on Jason about how he had not treated his apparent sickness before proceeding to explain to Alfred and Bruce that Jason apparently needed something called ectoplasm to stay healthy. That been a fucking ordeal, Jason certainly didn't want to repeat. Plus point was that this ectoplasm did indeed cure his Pit Madness, bad point was he had to take something that looked like fucking Pit Water on a regular basis.

And now Danny was apparently using him as his experimental guinea pig for his ectoplasm cooking. He could have at least said something about having it put into the food and tea. At least the teen looked somewhat apologetic at the glare Jason was sending him.

"Sorry… you just always made a face when you had to take the ectoplasm, so I tried making it taste better for you." He couldn't help it as he ruffled the others hair earning a pout in return. The teen reminded him of his brothers, if Alfred hadn't claimed Danny already as his, Jason was sure Bruce would have attempted to adopt Danny.

"I am not saying I didn't like it. Just don't put ectoplasm in tea anymore." He stabbed with his fork into the wiggling food to emphasize his next words When he lifted it he raised an eyebrow at the wiggling goob of something, that apparently doesn't taste as bad as it looks. "It's better in the food, despite causing it to look like something you shouldn't eat."

There was a crash behind him in the kitchen area right after he had placed the fork in his mouth and Jason arched an eyebrow at the suddenly very nervous looking Danny.

"What was that?" Jason asked, his eyebrow going even higher as Danny suddenly pulled out a green glowing steak knife out of seemingly nowhere.

"Nothing!"

Another crash resounded behind him and Jason was very tempted to turn around to see what caused it. But before he could, the green steak knife flew right past his head. "Nothing? Are you sure?"

"Uhm well… I might have kept quiet about a side effect ectoplasm can have on food." Another crash and Jason wondered if this was why Danny had waited for Alfred to be out of the Manor on errands before he attempted to cook.

"I won't say anything to Alfred as long as you don't use the good steak knives."

"Deal." Danny then proceeded to pull out the Demon Brat's throwing knives. Wide eyed Jason watched how Danny jumped over the table into the kitchen area, he turned in his seat to continue watching but found that Danny had disappeared chasing whatever had caused the crashing sounds.

"Demon Brat is going to bust a blood vessel, no one touches his blades." Jason muttered, turning back to his wiggling but actually good tasting food, deciding that for now, he would ignore the fact that Danny 100% was not a normal teen Alfred had taken in for a friend. If his knowledge about this ectoplasm was't enough to tip them off then the way had moved and used the blades just now definitely would and had.

Taking another bite, Jason marbled at the taste before he chuckled and wondered what would happen first. Him and his siblings figuring out what was up with Danny, the Demon Brat attempting to stab Danny for having used his throwing knives, or Danny figuring out their nightlife activities and the reason why Damian owned throwing knives in the first place.

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terracyte · 2 years

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civilian bruce got yeeted off one of the balconies of his own company and the really nice metropolis guy caught him before his kids could get there <3

bruce and clark are friends but he doesnt know clark is superman yet- the kids fucking know clark is trying his hardest to earn their dad's affection and nOT ON THEIR WATCH- THAT COUNTRY BOY'S GOTTA WORK FOR IT

#also this kinda answers an ask i got about supes in this au!#technically he isnt friends with bruce as superman #but clark kent and bruce wayne are besties outside of clarks other hustle #in primary colored alien spandex #they met as civilians and clark is smitten he cant help himself even though bruce is in trouble in literally another city #his kids dont appreciate that theY KNOW WHAT CLARK IS UP TO #terra art #bruce wayne #clark kent #superbat #superman #batfam #dc #civilian bruce au #im sorry duke and cass arent here kdsjahdj i was struggling too much with the angles and my hand hurts BUT they are near and dear #theyre back w alfred making more kryptonite infused weapons

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renecdote · 3 months

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alfred isn’t pulling his punches at all damn

#Alfred Pennyworth #Batman #DC #was going to be like ‘we all know it’s true but do you have to say it??’#but yeah of course he has to say it #he’s the only one who will #and he’ll keep saying it even though he knows bruce will never really listen

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aingeal98 · 1 month

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You would think that since Bruce and Cass's morals are so aligned I'd be rooting for Bruce in his confrontations against Jason but you'd be wrong. If it's Cass vs Jason I'm team Cass she has the moral high ground and I like her more. If it's Bruce vs Jason neither of them fully have the moral high ground even though technically Bruce and Cass's codes are quite similar. Because unlike Cass Bruce has been used as a mouthpiece by multiple right wing writers and also just plain bad writers to the point that you have to ignore a LOT to simplify his morals down to "Killing bad." Like yeah if Jason's going around murdering people I'm rooting for say, Cass or Dick to take him down. With lots of angst and challenging their codes and making sure everyone has a bad time. But Bruce is just such an asshole and yeah, bad person, in so many other ways. (You can ignore the comics where he's horrible if you want but they exist and there have been so, so many of them it's a consistent character trait post Jason's death. And it's never character assassinating him for anyone else, he's always presented as the Protagonist even when he's going through his edgy punch the kids moments. Which sucks but that's what DC chose.)

And also Jason was sacrificed for Bruce's pain and meant to just stay dead and smeared to let Bruce get the angst without the bad dad allegations so hell yeah son. Come back to life and torment your father. Be more than just a costume in a cave. Just get better comics and better fans because when you're not fighting Bruce you've been Lobdell's pet for so long that most casual readers associate you with his godawful writing right after the UTRH movie.

#after alfred I think bruce is my least favourite batfam member even though I enjoy so much of his interactions with my faves #But the way he treats Babs Steph Helena Dick Jason... Tim Damian and Cass too in a slightly different way #i like good batdad content but I was also rooting for gotham war to end with them jumping him and breaking his legs. u know.#dc #dc rambles #scared to tag this with any character tags because it's not coherent it's just something that's been brewing in my brain #like one part of it is that even when cass is wrong i care about her more than the people she's wronging.#and one part of it I do genuinely think despite their codes being so similar at this point Cass is the pure essence of what batman should b #whereas bruce is just. head stuffed up his own ass by so many different writers it gets boring.

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przeorysza · 29 days

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The Last Kingdom Season 1 + tumblr

#the last kingdom #tlk #tlk uhtred #uhtred ragnarsson #i can't believe i made something with uhtred senior Father Of The Year and yet.#also the last one was supposed to have both uhtred and skorpa but every frame they shared in ep 8 sucked ass #i loved s1 even though i will forever be baffled by the editing choice of adding a still frame of alfred at the end of the final battle #fellas i understand you were low on cash but there's no WAY that was your best option #maybe they were like 'yeah just put david's face there who cares bitches love david'#and you know what? they were not wrong.#this could have easily been uhtred text posts part 2 but i didn't have it in me to leave White Baby Edward out

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timdrake-yumm · 1 year

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A Tim who has a little bottle of Lazarus water. The lid has one of those pipette dropper things attached to it like some of those medicine bottles do. I’m talking pre-Robin Tim too. He uses it on all the injuries he doesn’t want people asking about that he can’t cover up some other way. It’s used very sparingly so he still has it as Red Robin (though perhaps he got it refilled when he was with the LoA). Where did he get it from? Who knows, but since he only uses so little, the side effects are harder to recognize. His eyes use to be such an icy blue, but now they look kinda teal? Not nearly as much as Jason’s of course, and they don’t glow yet. And he’s accidentally given himself some kind of pit madness immunity/resistance (like you would do with poisons) so that if he were put all the way, completely immersed in a Lazarus pit, he’d be much more in control of his thoughts and actions than Jason was. Is he still crazy? Absolutely, no sane person tries to clone their best friend almost a hundred times, but once people learn of the Lazarus water (if they ever do) they can’t be sure if that’s just Tim or if the water has been effecting him that way.

#dc #dc comics #tim drake #batfam #lazarus pit #immunity buildup #Tim never loses his Spleen because he’s got some handy magic medicine to heal it for him #does he initially know it’s Lazarus water? again who knows #I mean he probably does by the time red hood shows up #imagine of titans tower and Jason expects Tim to still be out because of all his injuries but Robin shows up on patrol as usual #or on a mission with the team if Bruce still has him benched because red hood is still a threat #and he’s perfectly healed #because Tim didn’t want to give Bruce or dick s reason to worry about him and that much broken bones is a little hard to hide #so he used the Lazarus water that he has and he’s fine #after using it so long anyways he probably has a faster healing rate too #is this how Lazarus water works?#probably not but it’s also a magical healing water so I figure I can make up my own rules too #Jason is completely baffled by robins swift recovery though and thinks that Tim is a meta #Bruce and Alfred probably also think this if they’ve been observing Tim’s unusually quick recoveries closely enough

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blehmehehhehneh · 2 years

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seen a lot of headcanons about battinson’s bruce being a virgin but i’d like to pitch in with the idea that he’s had sex maybe 4 times in his life and each time was more awkward and horrible than the last for increasingly hilarious reasons

#battinson #no matter what this dude could never be a playboy though #the thought of alfred having to witness the walk of shame get more and more shameful each time and knowing exactly what happened #absolutely glorious to me #bruce has to physically purge any thoughts of sex from his mind after the last time #and then he meets selina and alfred just *knows* somehow #and he’s like oh lord where are the tear buckets #i need shock blankets stat #before bruce spray paints reproductive systems on the floor or some shit #the batman 2022

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aelswiths · 5 months

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Aelswith & Alfred (being cute as hell) in 2x02

For @aethelreds, @kingslionheart, @volvaaslaug

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illiana-mystery · 1 year

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At this angle, he looks so innocent and sweet.

#he could easily fool me #just going by these pictures #i hate that he's so horrible though #he's so cute #it's a damn shame #but i could totally fix him #i know i could #denis brabrant #scorpion spring #my sweet alfredo #my heart #❤️❤️❤️❤️#alfred molina

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