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#...i find that my own issues are expected to be treated as a joke or a punchline or something i must whisper in the dark...
uncanny-tranny · 6 months
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It's weird how people paint "daddy issues" and even "mommy issues" as, like, a joke or a failure on part of the person who has those issues, rather than recognizing that daddy and mommy issues stem, for so many people, from abuse. What this all is is just abuse apologia, and nobody seems to either notice or maybe even care.
When somebody with daddy or mommy issues opens up about the "why," I can't ever seem to shake the fact that they tend to have gone through a ton of abuse and bullshit as a child. It's just crazy that other people would look at that and see a joke or a failure of the once-child who was abused.
#abuse#abuse tw#abuse mention tw#child abuse#child abuse tw#mental health#it really goes to show (to me) that people either can't or don't WANT to acknowledge that parents can be the ones to have fucked up#if all the blame is placed on their child/ren then you can maintain the illusion that the parent is always right...#...that parents know what is best and they will always do what is best for their child/ren#it's just weird to be somebody with parental issues and all that gets steamrolled into 'mommy issues' that then become a Big Joke...#...especially because i'm a man (and because people are misogynists who think it's just so funny that women are people)...#...i find that my own issues are expected to be treated as a joke or a punchline or something i must whisper in the dark...#...so that others may have the luxury of pretending to not hear it or to have the luxury of forgetting in the morning...#...and it just sucks because that leaves me to remember and grieve and doing that with the knowledge that my abuse Is A Joke at My Expense#if you wonder why so many abuse victims/survivors become unsavoury: this is why#i'm too bitter about this topic specifically to care about the comfort of people who don't get it and don't WANT TO...#...because it is THEY who are uncomfortable with the very NOTION that abuse happens#if you can't acknowledge that abuse happens WITHOUT downplaying to for your sense of comfort you will NEVER help abuse victims/survivors#you will find that you start prioritizing YOUR sense of comfort over the safety and continued survival of victims/survivors
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sanshoney · 6 months
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friend's father x male!reader
fem aligned, under 15 DNI
sub!bottom!reader, age gap (reader is 20, dominic is 45), daddy kink, hard degradation, rough sex, tiny masochism, infidelity, reader has daddy issues and a thing for older men, mutual pining
(intentional lowercase, no use of y/n)
well, sure, you fantasized about your friend's dad a few times.
i mean, dominic's so hot. his tall, muscular figure, slicked back black hair... and that hypnotizing, honeyed voice of his. he's like, THE dilf in every cheap porn.
but you still don't know how you ended up moaning underneath him, taking his merciless, aggressive trusts aimed perfectly at your prostate.
"don't you feel a little ashamed, you filthy slut? whoring yourself out for a man twice your age, huh?" he emphasizes every word with another hard thrust.
"s-sorry, i... ah!" you really, truly try to speak up but all you can manage are babbling and sinful noises.
"wearing a skirt, really? fucking whore. seducing a married man, how pathetic. did your daddy not love you?" he laughs cruelly, leaving you feel ashamed for the first time in the whole intercourse.
maybe you did wear a skirt. and maybe you did want to seduce him. but you weren't expecting him to give in! he's married, for fucks sake! but neither of you are thinking about his wife right now.
"d-daddy... sorry, sorry, sorry..." you chant while fat tears are rolling down your face. you really didn't think everything would turn out like this. but hey, you aren't complaining!
he pulls your hair and forces you to look at him, "if you're so sorry, then be a good whore and shut the fuck up. we wouldn't want my wife to come home and find a little bitch in heat underneath me, right?" you nod eagerly, shutting your mouth tight. you're trying, to no avail. moans and whines are escaping your lips, unintentionally louder and louder everytime his dick reaches sensitive points you didn't even know you had.
dominic sighs disappointed, "bad fuck toy. i said, be fucking quiet." he hisses, then slaps your ass harshly. it burns so sweetly, it surely will leave a mark. you feel giddy from the thought that he left a mark on you. his thrusts are becoming sloppier and you can feel yourself getting closer to your release too. you bite down on your tongue and grip the sheets. you really want to make him proud, huh?
a few minutes later, he finally cums in your ass, making you finish too. while his thick, warm seed flows into your plush walls, yours paints the sheets and your own stomach.
he collapses on top of you, trapping you in his arms tightly. you're both panting and you decide to cuddle up to him. he starts stroking your face and kiss your face. "maybe you're good for something, hm, pretty boy?" he smirks and you blush.
you suddenly remember something important. "your wife!" you stare at him with wide, panicked eyes. "oh, i was just joking," he laughs. your panic fades, "i hate you," you groan. "now, now. maybe you should hate yourself, pretty. you're the one who seduced a married man who's old enough to be your father. not to mention, your friend's father" he reminds you cheekily. "and i was successful" you grin proudly. "nah, i was just horny and you're like a perfect little slut," he says, but the way he looks at you tells something else.
of course you noticed how he acts around you lately. whenever you come over, he hugs you just a little tighter and longer than necessary. the way he always asks "how are you feeling, my boy?" with a gentle smile on his face. everyone noticed this, including his wife and even your friend. "my dad really likes you, huh?" he asks with a jealous toney which always makes you feel a little guilty. "ah, i don't think so... he's just very kind," you deny it everytime. truth is, later, at dinner, he dresses you down with his eyes.
you treat him like a father figure, expecting love from him. he was right, your daddy didn't really love you. maybe that's why you've been always drawn to older men.
he's usually so gentle, and this makes the fact that he's so rough and dominant in bed even hotter. you really just needed to feel the touch of a real man, huh?
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hope you enjoyed! <3
this is my first try at writing smut, so i hope it's decent.
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oceanic-sunsets · 7 months
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Mike around El and his very obvious Not-Crush
I want to start this off with a disclaimer: I interpret Mike as gay, so this analysis and the points I’ll bring up were written with this in mind. Now, let’s begin! 
Since my first watch, I always thought it was kind of weird-funny how Mike never showed any kind of shyness towards El, unlike the other boys, who the audience and characters in-universe never think of as having a crush on El. 
So they know El is a girl pretty early on, so when she first goes home with Mike and he lends her dry clothes, everyone freaks out when she tries to change right there in front of them. Pretty normal reaction for anyone, especially 12 year old boys! So, even in the middle of their freak out, Mike remains as the most well composed of the boys.
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He doesn’t turn around, instead, is quick to stop her, even reaching out towards her arms, and explain she should change in the bathroom, because, well, privacy. 
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He even guides El towards the bathroom door, and we know that he tries to close it but El stops him. So, he understands, she’s still scared, and again, explains she can keep it mostly closed, leaving a small gap open so she feels safer. 
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And then Mike goes to talk with Lucas and Dustin, who are still freaking out and talking about how she’s crazy, Lucas remarks “She tried to get naked” and Dustin makes the same hand gesture three times to really drive his point across. 
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And Mike? remains calm, really, his head is elsewhere, not stuck on the fact that a random, weird girl tried to change her clothes in front of them. Instead, his gears are turning, he’s already coming up with a plan so they can stay out of trouble, so she can be safe, and they can keep looking for Will: El has to stay the night, which Dustin finds insane.
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So, I first interpreted these kind of scenes as Mike being the more mature one of the boys. He NEVER goes “but she’s a girl!” the other characters are the ones who keep pointing that out to him. But really, Mike just treats her like a human being (and then he discovers she has superpowers). 
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And really, it’s funny how fascinating they keep finding this, but not surprising. Again, this is a normal reaction! that’s why I thought Mike was just the logical, more mature one. But that’s not really why: he just never made a distinction or a big fuss to separate THEM, boys, and El, a GIRL, until later on when people kept bringing that up. For Mike, El was just another kid just like them, he shows her his house, his TV, his toys, and has no issue getting close and just treating her like another friend. 
There’s another reason that points to the Duffers being aware of what they’re trying to do. It’s subtle if you’re not looking for it, and really, it just flies under most people’s radars, including our own! 
So we all know this scene, right?  
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The first instance of Mike being directly told he has to have a crush on her, because… he is nice to her, and she’s a girl. So, clearly. And then the bullies arrive, call Will homophobic slurs and Mike gets hurt, we know how that one goes. But you know the scene that plays directly before this one? 
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It’s Nancy. They’re making fun of her/shaming her because she hooked up with Steve, and we know how this plot goes too: the girl is slut-shamed and the boy is praised/admired for “getting” her. Nancy is worried because she left Barb alone and the next thing she knows, her friend is missing too. And she doesn’t feel guilty just because she dismissed Barb, she feels shame, and the kind of comment she’s receiving just adds to the guilt. 
And all this? it’s part of heteronormativity too, and all its social standards of what’s expected of people based on their gender and sexuality. Nancy? A slut for hooking up with Steve. Will? probably killed for being gay! The boys? get bullied just as Lucas is hugging Mike, even if it’s part of a joke. Mike? must like El, because he is a boy who is nice to her, and she’s a girl! See where I’m going? 
Next scene I’m going to talk about is this one: 
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And… It’s a great scene, really. But nothing about it is romantic. The boys help El dress up, and Mike even does her makeup and doesn’t mind! and, I’m sorry, but what 12 year old with a crush is NOT nervous to be that close? he’s just 100% concentrated in what he’s doing.
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And then El comes out, full makeover, and Mike’s reaction is just very sweet and genuine. Dustin hesitates: “She looks…” and Mike immediately goes “pretty”. Now, some people interpret this scene as Mike finally Realizing El is Actually a Girl. I both agree and disagree. 
I agree because that’s how it probably goes for Mike, just now in the sense most people expect. We should keep in mind the previous scenes: Mike is now aware of what other people think/what is expected of him. So he goes “pretty”, and oh, no, she’s a Girl, I can’t say that! they’re going to think I have a crush on her! “...pretty good” saved it:) but wait. That just makes it look even more like a crush! So maybe it is a crush, right? So, I think of this scene as the moment of Mike deciding that yeah, it must be a crush, making now a distinction between “friend” and “girl”.
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Other people have mentioned how particular this choice is: why would they have Mike next to El in the mirror? in the same scene where she’s presenting herself as Actually a Girl for the first time, wearing a pink dress, next to Mike, a Boy, who is even wearing blue! I don’t even think this analysis classifies as far-fetched for the same reason I mentioned earlier: the themes of the show are clear since the beginning, and plots like Nancy’s, Will’s, and later on El’s (and Max's) support that. Mike’s, however? it comes across as subtle (because really, it’s not), but it’s always been there, and the way the Wheelers are portrayed as a family confirms that too. 
 I don’t think he consciously makes the choice to pretend, more like it makes sense for him too, and the future events of the show just keep reinforcing this idea: she’s a girl with superpowers, who saves him and his friends many times, and people keep telling him he likes her! why wouldn’t he like her? And then there’s also survivor’s guilt but uhh… Let’s not go there, that’s another whole analysis. 
It’s now time to talk about my least favorite topic: mlvn’s kisses. They have never been portrayed as genuinely romantic to me, even if I did think the snowball one was sweet when I first watched it. But that’s the thing: it’s cute, I guess, but it’s just there like a point you have to mark as done in a checklist. Entirely different to Lucas’ and Max’s scenes: Lucas hesitates when he asks Max to dance, and he’s clearly nervous, exhaling before asking, and their kiss is awkwardly endearing, genuine, and realistic for their age unlike anything in Mike and El’s relationship and… The beginning of s3 is proof of that. It’s almost like they’re kissing to prove a point: El is older now, and Mike is her boyfriend, they kiss like in the soap operas! (for Hopper’s and the audience’s dismay) and for Mike, well, El is his girlfriend, that’s what he’s supposed to do, right? (as he takes her hands off him). 
Going back to the snowball, Mike plays the “date” role too perfectly. He does exactly what he should: he tells El she looks beautiful and asks her to dance, again, no hesitance. They dance and he kisses her… You guessed it, no hesitance. You could argue that it’s because it’s not their first thing, but the thing is… That one was a mess. It was out of nowhere, after talking about being family, as if Mike suddenly thought “yeah I think I should do this” and went for it. And… Did El even know what a kiss was? 
Anyway, back to s3. They break up and all that, supernatural shit happens and oh! Mike tells a whole room of people that he loves El! how can that not be proof that he at least has a crush? well. Because Mike is not lying, just as he wasn’t lying when he called her pretty. He does love her, wants her to be safe because she’s his friend, and feels responsible for her safety (for many reasons). The thing is… Mike is aware of the Implications of the word.
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He is being honest. He’s also confusing his feelings for romantic ones, just like he has since mid-s1. What’s the difference between the “ily” plot in s3 and in s4, then? wouldn’t that just be a repeat of the same? 
No. This is a point of debate and I know we have different opinions on “When Did Mike Realize”, but for me, the contrast between this plot in s3 vs s4 is that s3 Mike is unaware, while in S4 he’s IS aware Throughout s3 (and before) he genuinely thinks his feelings are romantic. Until THIS happens
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 …and suddenly he’s confused, thinking it makes no sense. I choose to interpret it this way because it’s supported by the S3 script, which portrays Mike as confused and wondering what is wrong with him. This would’ve been a great moment to portray Mike as endearingly nervous/shy: they’ve been broken up and it seems like no one had said anything that hinted at a romantic relationship during that time. If Mike had romantic feelings for El, he should’ve been thrilled, but he doesn’t move, doesn’t close his eyes, doesn’t even smile. But it’s not disgust, it’s confusion. He’s starting to question things. To what degree? we do not know. 
We can, however, infer from the events of S4 that he knows something. 
The airport scene is as sad as it is funny, because this is probably the first instance in the whole show that we see Mike Wheeler acting nervous-shy in the way you would in front of a crush: 
(Exhibit A)
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(Exhibit B)
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ok, Mike, Will didn’t imply otherwise? are you trying to convince him or yourself? 
(Exhibit C)
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(Exhibit D)
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This whole conversation is so insane because everyone is so focused noticing Will’s crush that they miss Mike’s behavior? Mike, who during this conversation hesitates a lot, chooses his words carefully, exhales, you can see him swallow and just. He looks more nervous here than in the entirety of ALL his scenes with El on the show.
I could keep going on about s4, really, because there’s a lot to unpack there. But this is getting too long!
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zegrvshvghes · 11 months
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enemies to lovers with vince dunn? 👀
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I crave you in the most innocent form-VD29
💙 a good enemies to lovers + vince and you are in university for the plot!
I've never been the kind of person to hold a grudge. I'm usually pretty easygoing and quick to forgive, but there's one person in my life who I just can't seem to get along with: Vince Dunn.
When Vince and I first met, I actually thought he was kind of cute. He had messy brown hair and these piercing blue eyes that seemed to look right through me. But as soon as he opened his mouth, I knew it was never going to work between us.
It started off small, with little jabs and sarcastic comments. But over time, our interactions grew more and more hostile. We were constantly bickering and arguing, and I could feel the tension between us every time we were in the same room.
Part of the problem is that Vince is just so arrogant. He thinks he's better than everyone else and doesn't hesitate to let you know it. He's always bragging about his achievements and talking down to those he thinks are below him. And for some reason, he seems to have a particular dislike for me.
I'm not sure what I ever did to him. Maybe it was something I said or did without even realizing it. But whatever the reason, Vince has made it clear that he can't stand me. He'll roll his eyes every time I speak and make snarky comments under his breath. And when we're forced to work together on a project or assignment, he'll intentionally sabotage my efforts just to make me look bad.
I've tried talking to him about it, but he just brushes me off like I'm not even worth his time. I've even considered going to a teacher or counselor for help, but I don't want to seem like a tattletale. Plus, I'm embarrassed that I can't seem to get along with someone who is supposedly my peer.
I sometimes wonder if Vince's hostility towards me is actually a cover-up for something else. Maybe he's struggling with issues at home or has some personal insecurities he's trying to hide. But then I see him acting perfectly normal and friendly with other people, and I realize that it's just me he can't stand.
It's not like I hate Vince, per se. I just can't stand the way he treats me. It's frustrating to constantly be on the receiving end of his animosity and to have no idea why he dislikes me so much. I try my best to ignore him and just focus on my own work, but it's hard when he's always there, lurking in the background and waiting for a chance to make some snide remark.
I sometimes wonder what it would be like if Vince and I could actually get along. Maybe we could even be friends. But I know that's never going to happen. There's just too much animosity between us, and I don't know how to bridge the gap.
As much as I hate to admit it, Vince's negative attitude towards me has started to dampen my own spirits. I find myself feeling irritated and angry more often, and sometimes I even snap at other people who don't deserve it. I don't like feeling this way, but I don't know how to shake it off.
I never thought I'd see the day where I could tolerate being around Vince Dunn, let alone willingly attend a party with him. But as fate would have it, that day came sooner than I expected.
It started when we were paired up for a group project in our English class. At first, I was dreading it. I couldn't bear the thought of being stuck with Vince for an extended period of time. But as we got to work on the project, I started to notice something different about him.
He wasn't as hostile towards me as he used to be. In fact, he was actually being sort of civil. He even cracked a few jokes that made me laugh. It was like he was a different person entirely.
I still didn't entirely trust him, but something had shifted in our dynamic. We were no longer constantly bickering and arguing. It was almost...pleasant.
We finished the project with minimal sniping, and I couldn't help but feel like maybe, just maybe, there was a chance for us to get along.
Fast forward to the party. I wasn't even considering going, but a mutual friend of ours convinced me to come along. When I arrived, I was surprised to see Vince there as well. He was hanging out with a group of guys, laughing and joking around.
I couldn't help but feel nervous as I saw Vince at the party. I knew he had been avoiding me lately, but I hoped that maybe tonight we could finally talk things out.
I saw him standing there with his arms crossed, glaring at me and the guy I was with. I could feel the tension in the air and my heart sank.
I knew I had to talk to him, to explain that the guy I was with was just a friend. But as soon as I tried to approach him, he turned his back on me, refusing to even acknowledge my presence.
It hurt to see him like this. He was acting like I had committed some kind of crime.
I tried to enjoy the party, but every time I looked over at Vince, I could see the anger in his eyes. I could tell he was angry, but I didn't know how to make it better.
I wanted to speak to him and possibly become friends maybe? but he was too angry and stubborn to listen. And I didn't know what else to do.
Stepping out onto the porch to get some fresh air. I sit down quietly, drunk and busy with my thoughts. I hear the door slide open again.
The face that’s been playing non stop in my brain appears. As Vince and I found ourselves on the porch, alone. We were both slightly tipsy, and all of a sudden I found myself feeling a strange attraction towards him. It was like I was seeing him in a whole new light.
He must have felt it too, because before I knew it, we were making out on the porch. It was messy and clumsy, but it felt...right.
I woke up the next morning feeling both relieved and terrified. I had just kissed the guy Im supposed to hate and I wasn't sure where it was going to take us.
Surprisingly, the next day in class it was like all the hostility between us had been replaced by something else. Something warmer and deeper.
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Hi, could I request for a Lady Tamayo!Reader paired with Buddha?
This reader was revived by Brunhilde to be the doctor for the 13 champions and she's loyal (not too loyal) to her bc she saved her from her punishment from being a demon.
The scenario would be that they met when she treated him after his fight and they got to know each other after that?
Please and thank you
Here it is! Special thanks to @nixes-noxes for proofreading/editing to make sure that the characters weren’t OOC. Enjoy and have a lovely day/evening!
Warnings: manga spoilers
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Buddha was…a difficult patient. Despite all of the odds that were stacked against him in his fight with Zero, he won. Yet his victory for humanity isn’t an excuse to sneak out of his room to bask underneath the canopy of his bodhi tree and enjoy a passing breeze with sun shining down from the sky.
That is one of the reasons why Brunhilde had summoned Lady [First Name] [Last Name] from Helheim despite being a demon; before she had been killed by Muzan after drugging him with an elixir during their confrontation in the Infinity Castle, Lady [First Name} had been a doctor. Together with her companion Yushiro, she helped as many humans as she could with their alignments,including those who had been afflicted with Muzan’s poisonous blood and became flesh-eating demons.
In retrospect, dying to give the Demon Slayers a chance to destroy the man who had ruined her human life wasn’t a terrible thing…but Lady [First Name] had not expected to wake up in a dark wasteland teeming with demons that were just as dangerous, if not more, than the demon king himself. It was through sheer dumb luck that she had survived for so long until the Valkyrie had brought from her ‘punishment’ and offered her the position of being humanity’s chief physician in the medical wing.
It did not take the young woman very much time to give Brunhilde an answer. At this point anything was better than being stuck in Helheim. Disinfecting wounds, monitoring a patient’s health, and making sure that they are being properly fed? Yes. She can do that.
But the demon did not recall that being the ‘chief physician’ also meant chasing after a stubborn god.
Shaking her head in disbelief, Lady [First Name] walked up the steep grassy hill as best as she could in her [Favorite Color] kimono and zori sandals till she was standing right behind Buddha, munching on snacks that she specifically recalled telling him to cut back on until he was ready for the next stage of his treatment.
“Why am I not surprised to find you here, my lord?”
“Should ya even be surprised anymore, doc?” Buddha snarked back, unwrapping a candy bar and throwing it in his mouth. “Besides, do you really believe I’d miss an opportunity to get some fresh air?”
She frowned. “I never said that there was a problem with being outside, Lord Buddha. In fact, it is supposed to improve your sleep, cognition, and overall well-being rather than being confined indoors all of the time. I did, however, say that you can but it would be in everyone’s benefit to inform myself or the staff that you wish to go outside instead of sneaking out. Lady Brunhilde was quite upset when she came to the medical wing earlier this afternoon to find out that you were…missing.”
“Bruni will be fine, she’s a lot tougher than she looks, believe me. Let her focus on the eighth round. I might have won but we still need more wins if the gods’ll leave the humans alone. More importantly,” He glanced over his shoulder, a single aquamarine orb staring right at her. “Do I even know you?”
Lady [First Name] tilted her head, staring at him for a moment before smiling softly. It appears that Lady Brunhilde was not joking when she had casually mentioned just how laid-back Buddha is…or simply doesn’t give a shit about anyone. The Valkyrie’s words, not hers, thank you very much. But being a doctor secretly researching demonic transformations or performing blood transfusions did not have its own issues. She also had to handle human patients too. Inhaling a deep breath through her nostrils, she calmed her anger before answering Buddha.
“All you need to know is that my job is to ensure the mental and physical health of all humanity’s champions, Lord Buddha. It goes against my oath as a doctor to force a patient to do something against their will. In this scenario, however, I offer…an ultimatum.” She paused, staring at the blonde-haired deity. Since Buddha didn’t interrupt nor look away, the demon took this as a cue to elaborate.
“I will speak to the staff and allow you to lounge outside here or in the greenhouse until a fixed time. When that time is up, you must return to your room and rest. Yes, this is a curfew, but this is the best that I can offer you right now. You may no longer be in critical condition, though there is a chance that your health or recovery might have some setbacks.”
She could tell immediately that Buddha wasn’t too thrilled with this restriction. No one likes having someone hovering over their shoulder or counting down the minutes until they have to go back to their room when all they want is a little time to themselves before running through medical tests for the nth time of the day.
“Is there any chance you can include snacks-”
“That will be taken into consideration once your bloodwork comes back, Lord Buddha.” Lady [First Name] chuckled, witnessing one of the most powerful gods pouting petulantly like a child. Shaking her head, she decided to do something that she hadn’t done in all of her years of practicing medicine: she sat next to him under the bodhi tree, paying no heed to getting grass stains on her kimono as she stared up at the floating islands of Valhalla in comfortable silence.
He did not say anything….that was progress. Maybe?
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the-flowerwolf · 1 year
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Hogwarts legacy headcanons
While normal people go and socialize I wake up and think about ✨them✨
So there's some headcanons about my favourite Legacy Team (as I call them) for ya folks while I'm writing a really big fic about them. Careful, some of them are sad. And don't mind my poor grammar thanks.
Btw, collages are mine, feel free to use them💙
🐍Sebastian Sallow🐍
First off all, if you turn him in, I don't trust you
Literally a typical Slytherin
A nerd. Just a nerd.
Quidditch? Babe, the only sport for him is dueling
Felt absolutely helpless when his parents died. And that's why he's so protective. He just can't let anyone else die on his watch
Really is a small version of his father and proud of it
Believes that the end justifies the means
Hopeless flirt BUT a gentleman. Wouldn't do anything you don't like
And also most probably believes in true love
A proud bisexual
Everyone think that "he fucks everything that moves" but he's a virgin who "saves himself for the one and only"
As some fan said, he was probably born on 18th September. And it's a canon now.
A great friend but a terrible secret keeper, so for Merlin's sake, don't tell him ANYTHING
Knows how to braid hair into the most complex ways
Pro feminist! Treats women right and knows all important stuff thanks to his sis
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🔥Natty Onai🔥
I'm sorry but she's so underrated and for what??
I believe she really respect traditions she were tought as a child
Her favourite holiday must be her birthday. All because it was the only day of the year when her parents forgot about all the dangers and sorrows and they just got together, spending the best time
Most probably will return to the homeland after Hogwarts
Is the only member of the team who play quidditch
(as a keeper ofc)
She's a lesbian idk dudes
A very honest girl who were raised to be a good person
So she just expects the same from others
A very competitive. But not like Imelda. Natty respects fair competition and knows how to honorably recognize a match
Although this does not mean that she will not destroy you to win
Is always cold poor thing
Religious bc I feel like it
Has mommy issues and don't tell me I'm wrong
Will definitely become the best auror one day
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🌼Poppy Sweeting🌼
Her favourite holiday is Christmas lemme tell you that
Trust issues
She's trying her best to be gentle with every living being because she saw too much violence already
And that's why she thinks animals are better than people (agree)
She's definitely an INFP and I won't change my mind
Looks like a cinnamon roll but will kill you
A cliché but I feel like she's an excellent cook
Although she would LOVE to find someone to understand her (like us) she's totally okay with being on her own
Is into mind games like chess
But will go to see a quidditch game just to support Natty (and mc if they play)
Is always up to an adventure
Bullies? Girl grew up among killers, you really think she would care about some bullies?
I feel like she has the strongest personality in here. Doesn't matter what happens she will always stand straight while helping others
Is a cat person
Can't cry bc she was not allowed as a child
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💚Ominis Gaunt💚
Just an innocent little boy let's be honest
He may look like he can kill you but he's just a cinnamon roll
Jokes about his blindness as a defence mechanism
Had a crush on both Sallow siblings at some point and I can't blame him
Saw a theory on tiktok that his patronus would be albino snake. CANON
Just wants to have a simple quiet life without any drama
Protective of his friends BUT is more protective of his boundaries
Don't mind his blindness he knows EXACTLY how to be a fashion icon
Another cliché: Omi can play piano
And it's the only thing his parents tought him that he loves. Playing helps him to calm down
Is very private, but as soon as he starts to trust you, he will immediately blurt out his life story, dreams, fears etc
Though he can't see an actual game, Omi likes to go on a quidditch game, because of the happy energy around him
Is sick most of the time for some reason. Cold, stomach ache or anything really
Also a nerd. But unlike Sebastian he's a fiction lover. Helps him to escape reality, especially in his family's house
Clingy with everyone he loves bc they make him feel safe
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essaytime · 4 months
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I think the main thing that absolutely infuriates me about the "Romeo and Juliet were just dumb, horny teens" take is this implication that because they were so young, their relationship had to boil down to them being dramatic and inventing some great romance to moan about, or lust and hormones. As a teenager, it makes me want to tear the speaker apart with my bare hands. Interchangeably with stabbing, maybe.
When you look at the text, you can clearly see that there is some emotional connection between Juliet and Romeo. Their first conversation is literally a sonnet - which already indicates some sort of understanding and mutuality, and it's also beautiful poetry. They are the only characters in the entire play that they are really fully comfortable talking to. The adults are caught up in the feud, Nurse loves Juliet, but cannot understand her (and makes a dirty joke at her expense in Act I, which for a person Juliet's age would be awfully unpleasant), Romeo's friends, though I Iove them, don't get his sensitivity - Mercutio laughing at it and Benvolio worried by it - which Juliet, in turn, appreciates. They speak of each other with respect and admiration, quite unusually in Verona, where all is conflict and even Juliet's own father insults her: look at the sonnet, the balcony scene, Romeo comparing his sweetheart to the sun or a jewel (in contrast to his earlier quotes about Rosaline, which are literally a compilation of clichés stacked on top of one another). Even when Juliet awaits their wedding night, in a speech clearly centered on sexual matters, there is a visible softness and affection with which she treats Romeo ("cut him out in little stars"...). She waits for the night because it's him, not "I want to sleep with someone because I want to sleep with someone". The two genuinely care about each other, and are fond of each other. Of course, we can wonder if this love would last if they were given an opportunity to grow older, but when the play takes place, this love is there, and it's beautiful.
(Off-topic, I'd also like to note that this is an Elizabethan play that takes place in even earlier times, presumably late medieval - early renaissance Italy. They wouldn't live in the modern world where you can date many different people and settle well into your thirties or fourties. The average marriage age for girls in Shakespeare's time was about twenty, in fifteenth century Florence it was eighteen. Both of them were from wealthy families, so they'd likely be expected - even if Juliet's parents did not force her into a marriage with Paris - to marry earlier, for financial and political purposes. There couldn't be a "growing older" like we imagine it. Even their hypothetical different relationships would be early relationships for today's standards)
And it makes my blood boil when the visible genuine bond between these two is reduced to just "dumb kids being horny". The motive behind these words being partly, of course, the high-school-acquired All Required Reading is Nonsense edginess, but also a deeper issue - the inability to comprehend the fact that teenage love is also often real love.
Being capable of having deep and meaningful romantic relationships does not come baked into your birthday cake when you turn eighteen or attached to your first ever bill. Not every single feeling a teenager might harbour is at its core shallow lust and wanting to get laid. Of course, there's lots of cases of shortsighted infatuation where the pair really have nothing in common! I could name at least a few examples I have seen personally. But still, on every street and every corner of the world, and often a few metres from these pointless infatuations, teens fall in love because there's something more to it. Because they find they have a lot in common, because they get along well with each other, because they are able to see the good in the other person - their kindness, their intelligence, their enthusiasm, you name it. "Teens" including the younger teens, from thirteen to fifteen. And this love is a deep emotional bond. Sure, in most cases it will not last until death (and to be honest, relationships not working out is not really a teenage-specific phenomenon and a sign that young love of all is inherently doomed and it has to die so the curse of growing up is fulfilled), but it doesn't make it less of a love when it still remains, and it includes all the things love is about. Young couples go on dates, and have fun. They confide in each other. They support each other through hard times, they show care, they sometimes make sacrifices for their loved one's good. As any person in love does, at any age.
When I fell in love four months ago, I did not fall in love because I wanted to sleep with someone so bad. In fact, I do not want to - not for the next several years. I realise it's something I might want someday, but it's not today; and above all, I'm way too young. If anything, what I want is to kiss someone, or run my fingers through his hair, or read with his head in my lap - but it's not something I'd go out of my way and date a random person to get, come on. I fell in love because he is actually the first boy that reminds me of myself so much, the first I can understand so well. Because I also have a penchant for history and writing, I also tend to use formal and flowery language in very informal situations, I also enjoy people's attention (though I seem to worry more about being a potential inconvenience than he does), I also believe that we should judge people as individuals, because there's too much nuance in one person to make proper statements about large groups - and I find in him so many things that I can relate to, though of course I can't say I know him well enough to speak much for sure. Besides, he's simply a wonderful person, not flawless, of course, but he has a good heart. He is always kind, and well-mannered, and intelligent, and you can laugh with him. He would care if something bad happened, no matter if he says that he wouldn't. I think I know him well enough to say this at least. And if he loved me back (a thing I consider unlikely for now, but not entirely impossible), would we stay together forever? Heaven alone knows! Maybe not! It is up to the higher power. But even if we broke up, that wouldn't erase the fact that I loved him, and I would have done a lot for him, and we were able to have meaningful conversations. Just because a love isn't forever, doesn't mean it was never there.
Because - what the "dumb kids" people don't seem to grasp - teenagers are also human beings with a functioning, even if not fully developed, brain, capable of having complex feelings and thoughts just like an adult. Note that Shakespeare's leads, at least Juliet, actually do that - hence the pre-wedding night monologue, the "deny thy father and refuse thy name", her statement (I don't know the English original of that one, to be honest) that she is too soft and loving towards Romeo already, but it's because she has such profound feelings for him she can't even pretend to be strict. It's noticeable that she has some emotional maturity, at least - she shows some critical thinking abilities, she understands the consequences of many actions, she is able to see that the feud is pointless and a name is just a name. She's a teenager, and someone in their teens is also a Homo sapiens specimen, not a being from a different planet. Teens think and feel. It might not be the same reality as the adult one, and they don't deal with emotions with such ease as an adult would, but that doesn't mean they are unable to truly love and care, to enjoy talking to someone and want the best for them, like grown-ups do - as developing an affection for someone that makes you happy is a very human thing, and I can guarantee you a thirteen or fourteen-year-old is a developed enough human being to experience it.
So, to sum it up, if I hear any "Romeo and Juliet were just dumb kids being horny" on my watch, the author of this statement will presumably be mercilessly killed, and then I'll do as Fulvia allegedly did to Cicero and stab something through their tongue, except instead of a hairpin, I'll probably use one of the darts my little brother got for Christmas. They are very sharp. We have several holes in the floor already.
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summershouto · 1 year
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baby 5 & sanji- the role of gender
I’m definitely not the first person to say this but Sanji’s women obsession is very similar to Baby 5’s need to please and I wanted to expand on it more bc the thoughts keep bouncing around in my brain 
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Sanji and Baby 5 have the same core need to find love and it effects their actions- especially in matters with romance/the opposite sex. While both of their fixations are often treated as jokes, they still reflect underlaying issues tied to their backstories.
The way they act on this romantic drive is somewhat different, as they both assume the traditionally expected roles in accordance with their gender. They’re putting on a performance, behaving over-the-top in effort to please, while still varying in how they portray their love-sickness to remain a model man/woman. these differences set them apart, and I feel in Sanji’s case it can result in his behavior being brushed off as simply a weird quirk (unlike Baby 5, who’s actions remain lighthearted but are recognized as a trauma response).
They both have the same reaction to potential interest/attention, but remain strictly on the opposite ends of the spectrum of Man vs Woman in a conventional relationship. 
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Baby 5 maintains a caretaking, flattering-focused obsession of the opposite sex rather than transforming into having pervy gags. She wants to be needed but she also enjoys (and sometimes imagines) being swooned over.
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Looking at Sanji in the beginning, before the annoying nosebleed/creep gags became more prominent, he was also rather romance driven rather than motivated by lust. He, similar to Baby 5, saw many as potential suitors; a hopeless romantic at heart. While Baby 5 strikes at the first sign of interest from a man, Sanji equally treats every woman as someone he needs to look after . 
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Baby 5 jumps into the role of a caring wife. She blushes like a schoolgirl and assumes that every man who is kind is showing interest in her. Meanwhile Sanji, filling the role of a traditional man in the relationship, seeks to provide. He wants to aid women in any way possible- whether thats with cooking or actual physical protection. His pervy gags could also be read as a way to fit this norm- as a man it’s more societally acceptable to be lust driven- (and in some cases, lust/sex is a way to “prove” ones manhood).  This is especially prominent after his time apart from the crew surrounded by people that challenged his notions of gender.
Overall their use of these traditional gender roles are safe; an easy way to get attention. People in real life often use romantic attention as means of fulfillment, and I read their actions as the same.
Baby 5 and Sanji are both people pleasers. Baby 5 is named as such, noting she can’t deny anyone anything because she longs to be needed. Sanji’s lack of self-worth causes him to always put others first, even at the cost of his own wellbeing. They see themselves as existing to fulfill a needed role, bidding their time until the moment arises. 
Other people have noted how similar Baby 5 and Sanji are in this way, joking that it’s good Sanji and Baby 5 never met because they’d get married instantly. I think it would actually be very interesting if they had met. Two people pleasers in a relationship is a recipe for disaster, especially with people as passionate as Baby 5 and Sanji. Their way of dealing with conflict would be to.. not. Neither would ever want to say the other is at fault. Their approach towards romance is seeking a sense of fulfillment, which would create an interesting dynamic with their exaggerated swooning. 
Now there are some people who truly are greatly motivated to pursue relationships, but with Sanji and Baby 5’s backstories revolving around a lack of love,  it’s safe to assume that it’s a bit more of an inorganic reaction for them. Especially when looking at the situations their love gets them into, such as when Baby 5 fell head over heels for a man because he was kind to her once despite not showing any prior attraction. 
Sanji is on the opposite side of the spectrum, finding /every/ woman beautiful and himself unworthy. Where Baby 5 aims to prove her worth from any one person and seeks a reason for her receiving kindness, Sanji places himself below all the women he meets and grovels in attempt to please as they stand on their pedestals. 
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Sanji was raised by Zeff- someone who had a strong influence in how Sanji perceives and treats women. Sanji’s hunger for love was enhanced by the teaching of strict gender roles and emphasis on chivalry. While Baby 5 longs to be the helpful wife, Sanji becomes the pursuer- acting like a white knight as he sought women’s attention. That’s not to say his attraction isn’t real, but his extreme reactions to women reflect his desperation to please. 
Sanji also has the added factor of the men vs women in his life prior to Zeff, with only his mother and sister showing him kindness. Women were safer; and Zeff furthered this belief through his teachings.  
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They’re both self-sacrificial to a dangerous degree. To them, their lives are indispensable; meaning if someone needs to die for the greater good then that’s the role they feel they were made for. Their life IS other people.
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This is also interesting to consider in the perspective of non-heterosexual relationships. Sanji has a complicated past with gender/sexuality, so his aggressive actions towards men reflect what he feels a “real man” should be. Feminine attention is good, acceptable to enjoy, but male attention is something to scorn.
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For Baby 5, we don’t really see her react to the kindness of a woman. She grew up around predominantly men and men appear to be the ones who most often take advantage of her. It’s curious to consider if meeting another woman with good intentions would allow her to be more sincere. 
I guess in conclusion I often see Baby 5’s actions being recognized as a response to her past, but I don’t often see Sanji’s explained similarly. Personally I think Sanji’s behavior is greatly effected by his starve for love, and he throws himself into it just like Baby 5. However, the way theyre perceived is greatly effected by their gender and their according behavior to fit the norms. Regardlessly, he and Baby 5 both rely on other people to find their worth- and the quickest way to do that is to turn to romantic love. 
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genericpuff · 11 months
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Mystery solved.
Okay. Okay I gotta figure out where to begin with this- breathes
A fellow ULO community member was going through old S1 panels and pointing out typos that we had all somehow missed (LO typos have a tendency to sneak by like that) and one thing they pointed out that I had never noticed was this one panel from Episode 102:
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Particularly pointing out how the font overlays Hades' fingers which is just hilarious. That was where it was supposed to end.
But have you ever actually read the letter?
Because I did. And it took me on a ride I wasn't expecting to go on at 2:30 in the morning.
This shot of the letter is from the second instance it appears, when Hades scratches out part of it and writes, "I love the way you treat me, and I want to feel that way all the time."
But the first time this letter appears, when he's actively writing it, it's delivered to us through narration, in Episode 47. I actually love this episode, it does a great job at visual storytelling without overuse of active dialogue, and the content of the letter itself shows a great amount of self-awareness from Hades in the moment, even though the dark implications of what he's feeling is falling on his own deaf ears and the scene itself is quickly dashed by the obligatory quip-for-comedy-so-people-don't-get-too-sad of Hades' dismissing his therapist's advice, with the irony of him not realizing his own issues as he's writing this letter mere hours before overstepping his boundaries and having a guy whacked for taking photos of the Goddess of Spring.
But there was one line in particular that's always stood out to me.
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The line "it ends up hurting you" felt random and out-of-context. In the beginning on my first read through back in early-mid 2019, I thought maybe it was just being poetic and I "didn't get it", until I became a critic of the series and had a reality check and realized it was likely just a typo, perhaps it was meant to be "It would end up hurting you" or something of that nature.
But it was looking at that panel of the letter and actually reading the text that was there that I realized - the line feels random and out-of-context, because it is random and out-of-context.
Look back at the letter. Paragraph eight. Rachel didn't write the full line despite it being necessary to the line 'it ends up hurting you'.
The full excerpt reads:
"I WISH I COULD EMPTY A DRAWER IN MY DRESSER FOR YOU, OR BUY YOU A TOOTHBRUSH TO KEEP IN MY BATHROOM. THE TRUTH IS, EVERY TIME WE HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH EACH OTHER... IT ENDS UP HURTING YOU."
I can't believe it's not just a typo. I can't believe it took me this long to find this. I don't know how this got missed by Rachel, I'm assuming she wrote the letter out first and then copy and pasted the words into a larger font size which she placed throughout the episode, but how could that one part have been missed when the line "it ends up hurting you" is a dependent clause that can't stand on its own without the line that precedes it?
At the very least, I do finally feel like I've found closure over this one scene, now that I know the full context to the line. And I wouldn't have found it if it weren't for people joking about the letter panel being drawn like shit.
But it's definitely discouraging because it begs the question, what else is being haphazardly left out of the dialogue? What other clunky sentences with next to no context or build-up or reasoning could be better if they were actually finished or if Rachel and her team had spent the extra time to double check the script and ensure that no sentence is being left half-finished?
The irony in this scene as well is that Hades acknowledges he's too old for Persephone, he acknowledges that they aren't good for each other and that he'll only wind up hurting her, he acknowledges that he barely knows her and he shouldn't call what he feels for her 'love', but infatuation, a very accurate and self-aware statement that I feel like the current Hades lacks. It makes it feel all the more distressing when the letter makes a return in Episode 102, and he makes one simple change:
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As impactful as this statement was back in the day, looking back, knowing fully well how far his character has now fallen, this now feels less like a triumphant statement accepting his feelings and more like one of giving in to his selfish desires. This is even more accentuated by the use of the red ink, which splatters across the page alongside messy handwriting, contrary to the meticulous typewriting above.
He's pushing off his baggage as a mere bridge to cross later.
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He's making hopeful assumptions about her feelings and putting her on a pedestal without communicating his actual baggage outside of his own head and with her directly. In fact, he doesn't get around to talking about this baggage until she's in a position to depend on him in Season 2.
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He's fantasizing about their future with next to no foundation yet, and while he's recognizing that she might not be happy with him in the long term, he still tosses all those legitimate concerns aside to "I love the way she treats me", as if all that matters is what she can do for him - and what he can and can't do for her isn't important until it will inevitably rear its ugly head after she's already become his.
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This is the turning point where Hades has become the villain. Where he's shifted from being the responsible adult and leader to an obsessive fanatic whose only goal is to have Persephone. To the point that, despite him saying in the letter that it would be best to limit his presence around her-
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-seems to be upset over the notion of doing that exact thing as soon as she's the one to suggest it. Acting as if he's being rejected when he was the one to originally conceive the idea to limit their presence around one another for her own good.
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Hades being a responsible King and adult went out the window years ago and I feel like this was the moment where it happened, and that red pen was the gavel. Apparently all it took was her admitting she has a crush on him - undoubtedly as shallow as his crush on her, based solely on infatuation but not written on paper as Hades' confession was - for him to toss aside all that work to unpack his feelings and all that responsibility he was willing to take. Never mind the fact that her feelings could undoubtedly use unpacking of their own. Never mind the fact that her liking him back still doesn't change the reality of their situation - that they're fundamentally different people, from different worlds, with vastly different experiences and outlooks and values and goals, living in massively different life stages. Try as it might to be presented as romantic, that "opposites attract", it's more appropriately and commonly known as being incompatible.
If this were any other story, this would be a precautionary tale in so many ways, made especially significant for an audience that's largely coming of age and experiencing feelings of infatuation and attraction for the first time.
But this isn't that story. It's Lore Olympus.
Hades is, through and through, the villain of this story, no matter what the narrative tries to convince us of otherwise. I stood by that statement before and I stand by it even more so now. Unfortunately we're now at the point where Persephone herself has become a villain, corrupt by the same system she used to criticize.
And just like the letter and all its raw text admitting to Hades' faults and baggage and showing he's willing to take accountability, so too does the narrative itself slyly tell the ugly truth in between its lines: that love is not enough, that love is not the same as obsession, that power can corrupt even the purest of hearts - that love is enough, that you should pursue the one you desire until they're yours and only yours, that you should climb higher towards those in power above you until you have that same power in your hands.
Because you love the way it makes you feel and you want to feel that way all the time.
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JD's Squad
A few notes on the beginning of John's squad for Soldier On - this is not a finished list; just what I have for now. The Current Cast is John Dory, Delta Dawn, Dickory, Chaz, Pete (Retired), Tresillo (new) but this is just beginning thoughts.
Suggestions are welcome!
John spends any leave that he has to leave base with one of his squad - usually Delta or Dickory - although in the later years, he does do some camping. In the last few years leading up to the explosion and incident, Delta's sister became a single mother. John has stayed there to help out sometimes.
If he is not with one of his squad, he will usually find a camping spot to stay in while doing the odd and end jobs for locals to pass the time and a cheap price.
For a while, John just stayed on base when his squad was on leave and didn't take it when offered but eventually Delta and Dickory forced him to go.
John lives very simply with very, very few possessions so he ends up just saving a fair bit of money. He's been in the military for probably over ten years now. There have been a few guys that have rotated through their squad. Pete retired and was eventually replaced with Tresillo (they don't share rank though, it's just the numbers).
Chaz is talented but a bit egotistical and can be difficult to work with. Most people do not like working with him. He definitely rubs John the wrong way and although John can usually tolerate him, they have fought before. John has broken Chaz's nose. Which drove him nuts because the guy is a bit vain.
No one expected John and Dickory to get along, but they are actually pretty close. Dickory is the shortest of the group but he's strong and crafty. And not to be underestimated. His parents were immigrants and so he carries a fairly heavy accent. He's got a younger brother, Hickory, who he is close with. Hickory wants to follow in his brother's footsteps but Dickory thinks his talents lie elsewhere.
Growly Pete, as he was known as, didn't talk much but was a great shot and an even better survivalist. John took to it with his outdoorsy nature and wasn't very offput by Pete's quiet nature, so Pete took the time to teach him. He retired a few years before the incident.
Tresillo is a fairly new soldier who was given a choice - jail or the military - and he won't ever tell you he made the wrong one. He doesn't have much in the way of family and was kind of unruly at first but he's got more discipline now and he likes his squad a lot. Doesn't love being treated like a kid but he kind of gets used to the younger brother treatment. Great dancer. Taught John and Dickory Spanish.
Even before Pete left, John and Delta kind of got the dad and mom tag, being the responsible ones. JD took care of his little brothers for years and was kind of used to it and Delta is a natural leader. The mom and dad jokes are mostly kept quiet and behind their backs.
In the incident, John was the one with by far the most severe injuries. Delta wasn't there at all and when she does hear the news, she does feel a little guilt for not being there. It's dumb and John would tell her that, but still.
Tresillo straight up blames himself. Period.
Everyone involved is extremely tight-lipped about what happened and they won't talk about it. Sometimes a little with one another but that is about it.
John becomes especially mindful and protective of youngsters. This may include both minors and young adults. This mostly comes from protecting Tresillo during the incident, who to John, is seen as barely an adult. (This is also a bit of a nod/projection to how my horse trusted and protected kids when we got her before she ever trusted adults with her own issues.)
Tresillo probably won't stay longer in the military than he has to. The incident might even give him an out. It's not that he doesn't like the military, but the incident does freak him out and after what happens to John... yeah. Part of it is some guilt, part of it is that he doesn't get along with a lot of other people and he kind of doesn't want to. John and their squad became the people he got along with, trusted, etc.
It takes a while for Tresillo to visit John after what happens but when he does, he might stick around. I don't know yet. He and Branch do become friends.
The first time Bruce sees John with Clampers, for a second he thinks John knocked some girl up. And John is just...she's like... three years old. It's becomes kind of a joke.
John may or may not punch Chaz again after leaving the military.
Floyd finds out about John entirely by accident and it's awkward and weird. He does get a little upset that no one told him before this. (He mostly communicates by letters and hardly uses a phone and is constantly traveling very busy with his growing career).
Delta ends up finishing her tour but something happens that leaves her having to take care of her niece, Claudia (aka Clampers).
That's all I got for now.
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polyamzeal · 8 months
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Hello! I have a bit of a situation that I would like your honest opinion on; I've read a lot of your asks and I trust your opinion on this, as I unfortunately delved into reddit initially and that was not a pleasant experience.
I have experience with romantic polyamory, and I'm out to the important people in my life; I'm also married.
Recently, my spouse and I have been talking about how nice it would be to have another partner to love and care for as we do with each other. (Note: we discussed this shortly after we started dating, so it's not something new to us) We've been talking about a long-term triad who we'd like to nest with if the new partner would like to nest with us as well.
We don't have any, in my own opinion, unrealistic expectations of the partner. We don't have any "qualifications" or a "job application" that you would typically find with unicorn hunters.
I've been doing my reading, as I haven't been with multiple people in a couple years and wanted my information on terminology to be up-to-date. I've found that another big issue with unicorn hunters is that they treat their partner like a little secret, introducing them as a friend and such.
Like I mentioned earlier, I'm out of the closet about this, and I'd always introduce my partners as just that, my partners, and I'm sure my spouse would do the exact same.
So would my spouse and I still be considered unicorn hunters just for wanting to hopefully pursue an equal & ethical triad relationship without any expectations whatsoever? Reddit has been so unkind 😅
Thankyou so much for your time.
Absolutely!
Alright, that is a bit of a joke. I like Reddit for a lot of things but their polyamory community is infamously bad. And pretty much all polyamory social media always witch hunts Unicorn Hunters. And not without some good legit reasons. Lots and lots of people get hurt by unicorn hunters. But I have seen lots of people jump to immense conclusions as soon as it is mentioned. I have seen people describe their unique situations only for the replies to completely ignore it, clearly not reading all the way through, just to read a pre-scripted response about how unicorn hunters are bad and they should feel bad.
As you have mentioned, I don't really agree with this. I am a unicorn myself. I like dating couples! I don't feel like I am abused or taken advantage of when I do. Admittedly I have some privilege and advantages there. But regardless I think smart unicorns can effectively date ethical couples.
So my advice is to just be really upfront with any potential partners about what you are looking for. Be honest about limitations. It sounds great that you are open and would introduce them as a real partner. But also be realistic about if the existing couple would have any advantages over the new partner even if that isn't the intention. Make sure the new partner always feels like they have agency and are not trapped. I personally favor open triads to closed ones but that is a decision for all of you to make. Be understanding that a new partner will most likely not like each of you equally at the same pace. They may lean towards one person more. And over time things may shift to lean another way. Your existing relationship will probably go through this too as New Relationship Energy might overpower the old marriage for a time. This is normal and workable. Trying to force everything to always be equal often leads to problems.
Just try your best to be ethical and make everybody happy. Mistakes will be made along the way but they can be worked out. If everybody involved is happy then don't let the internet judge your triad.
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thefirstknife · 1 year
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Since a lot of people have been talking about possible antisemitism and racism in Bungie's writing I wanted to add something that always bothered me.
I think that Saint-14 as a character is at least influenced by some pretty anti Slavic stereotypes. He's the only major character of Slavic origin (accent) and he just so happen to embody the stereotype of "Slavic brute". He's strong and kills hordes of enemies not showing almost any remorse. And the Season of the Splicer even managed make it worse! Even when he's portrayed as having some deeper thoughts and agency he's still constructed as being unable to be subtle with his words (despise speaking English)
I really like Saint as a character but it's unpleasant to see that he's clearly created as a stereotype
I respectfully disagree. I've seen this line of thinking around A LOT, especially during Splicer, and I don't understand where it comes from outside of people being unable to treat non-native English speakers right. Source: I am Slavic. Not American with Slavic heritage, I am a Slavic person living in a Slavic country and English is not my native language.
Saint is as far away from a brute as possible. Ever since he's settled down in the City, he is dedicated to protecting, not attacking. He feeds birds and sings songs with the children of the City. He dedicated his time to learn to bake cookies for the Eliksni and was considerate to find a recipe that is specifically for Eliksni. He fights when he has to, but has largely settled down and would rather plough fields and plug holes in the wall than fight. He is incredibly emotional and emotionally intelligent and understanding. He is aware of his own and other people's emotions and he's open about it unapologetically.
He is so non-aggressive to the point of many in the community, including big lore youtubers, wishing for Osiris to DIE, just so they can see Saint being angry and aggressive enough to go on another bloody rampage. Because Saint is too tame for them. Too passive, too peaceful. Where is he a brute right now?
Saint has been "brutish" before Season of Dawn, because we never saw him anywhere outside of a couple of lines. He essentially didn't exist as a character until Season of Dawn and the only thing we knew about him was that he was a legendary Titan who went on a crusade against the Eliksni and killed many of them. That's definitely brutish!
When we met him in Dawn, we met him in the middle of his crusade, at the time where he lost countless innocent people to Eliksni in the middle of the horrible conditions of the Dark Age. He is... rough, and angry. Reasonably. He just got to Mercury to save civilians and he lost them and he almost died. He thinks in black and white terms; Eliksni bad, humans good. He is harsh and lost.
But, that's when we find him in a bad position and when he's yelling on comms because he's under fire. He also speaks in broken English and with an accent. People are prejudiced when they hear it and immediately assume less subtlety and less eloquence. That's not on Bungie. That's on the prejudiced audience.
In written text, he speaks perfectly fine. Observe this and this. The issue arises when he speaks out loud (with an accent) or when he's talking to friends casually or when he's making jokes. I don't know why people expect him to speak like he's giving a speech at all times. He can speak perfectly fine, but for non-native speakers, that can be exhausting. He is allowed to drop the eloquence in a more relaxed situation.
Pointing out Splicer is incredibly strange to me because in Splicer he made the biggest possible turning point when he was confronted with how other people see him as a brute. The cutscene where Mithrax tells a story about how the Eliksni view him as a monster shook him to his core. He has been on a path of redemption ever since and dedicated his time to gently protecting Eliksni. He even started learning their language and culture.
I would understand saying that Saint started off as a brute, because he did. But Bungie pulled the biggest flip of a switch on us when they showed us that Saint is actually a huge softie, a gentle man who was pushed to war only to protect, someone who lives for peace and quiet. He is good-natured, trusting, perceptive, kind and empathic.
How is this man a brute (this is just a small selection of his idle lines):
Food reserves are dwindling. New land must be ploughed. I can do this! / Everyone is so accommodating, I- I will think of ways to give back to them. / Shaxx, ugh. Glory is for the selfish. We fight to end the fighting. / To hear the children laughing. This is the peace we fight for. / The city breathes, ships flow through its veins. There is life here, and it is thriving. / I walked the City walls, plugged holes. Every small act brings us closer to peace. / The Traveller teaches us in these quiet moments. We are not defined by our scars. / The Light does not make us heroes, friend. Power is only good when it is used for good. / I am glad to see birds still nest in these old walls. / This life can take its toll. Come to me if you need to talk. / Yesterday, a child came to me. He carried a painted shield of paper. I turned to him and he threw the shield at my head! A young Titan, I love it! [laughing]
Saint-14 is the gentlest man in the whole damn setting. Bungie said "fuck toxic masculinity in particular" when they decided to treat us to a Saint so kind that people in-universe are surprised to learn that's THE Saint-14, the one who fought at Six Fronts and led a crusade against Eliksni. Eva's assessment of this:
"That's right," he said, spreading a little more birdseed. "It is a pleasure to meet you, Eva."
We sat a little longer together, watching the pigeons and the clouds, before I finally had to excuse myself to go back to my work.
As I said, I'd heard the legend of Saint-14 before. Many legends of remarkable Guardians make them seem like mythical figures, so far removed from anything the civilians of the City will ever see or experience. The legendary Saint-14 does not seem that way to me at all.
In fact, I think he is a very nice young man.
Saint is deeply ashamed and regretful of his violent past. Because he DID have a violent past, much like pretty much every Lightbearer. Saint and Shaxx discuss this, as well as Shaxx and Mithrax. But as much as he fought and as powerful he is, Saint does NOT enjoy war or fighting. He endures it because he knows that sometimes you must take up arms to protect those who can't protect themselves, but if he had the option to be sure that the City will stay safe without his aid, he would hang up his armour forever.
I've talked a lot about how much I appreciate that Bungie took a big powerful manly man who went on rampaging crusade before and presented him to us as a gentle and kind person who loves children and birds, who prefers domestic tasks over war and who is deeply emotional and thrives on kindness. It's quite strange to see people saying that he's a "Slavic brute stereotype." He is literally the opposite of it.
If there are specific instances in lore that someone thinks are stereotypical and brutish, I would love to see them so I can address them in context. I'm also not sure what "subtle with his words" means exactly, but if there are examples of this that you'd like addressed, I'm happy to investigate. Bungie is obviously not perfect so there could be instances where they messed up, though I can't currently recall any in regards to Saint and the fact that he's Slavic.
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thenightfolknetwork · 2 months
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So I'm a member of a genus known for our... fertility, shall we say? And our lagamorphic ears. And that's all very well and good except that I'm asexual. And I keep getting disbelief from *everywhere*. Sapios, nightfolk, my own family. I wear flag pins and the like but someone looks at them, then my ears, and goes back to the "breeding like rabbits" comments. How can I deal with this?
I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this kind of harmful ignorance, reader. Not only is it profoundly insulting for you as an individual, it also demonstrates a profound disrespect for your genus as a whole.
Your genus may have expectations around reproduction that differ from the majority – or, more likely, that differ from the sapio “norm”. These expectations may be rooted in your different biology or in how your culture approaches sex and child-rearing – or, more likely, in both.
But an expectation is no more prescriptive than an average. Statistically speaking, the average person in the UK has brown hair. It does not follow that one should find it remarkable to come across someone who does not.
How you deal with this issue depends on the context of when and where these comments take place, and what your relationship is with the person making them. Your safety is paramount above all, and if the situation is one where it is unsafe to push back, know that you are doing absolutely the right thing by protecting yourself.
If you do feel able to respond and have the energy and will to do so, remember to stay calm and don't let the other person derail the conversation with their own hurt feelings. Nobody likes to be told they've done something inappropriate or accidentally been offensive. But it's not your job to hold their hand through their emotional response.
Be clear and to the point. You will need to put this into your own words and find a way of expressing it that feels comfortable to you, but the gist of what you're telling them should be, “When you make jokes like that, it feels like you don't respect my identity as an asexual person or as a person my genus. I want you to apologise, and refrain from making such comments in the future.”
Each part of the statement is important. First, you identify the problematic behaviour. It's not that they are an offensive person inherently – it's that they are behaving badly in this instance. Second, you explain why it is offensive and on what counts. Finally, you offer them a way to make amends.
Once you've said your piece, the rest is up to them. They can either apologise and move on, or have a temper tantrum. If they choose the latter, simply disengage. There is no point talking to them until they've calmed down enough to behave properly.
Above all, reader, know that the problem lies with them. They are responsible for their own ignorance and for their own behaviour. All you can do is communicate your needs and boundaries, and treat yourself with the respect and dignity you deserve.
If others are unable or unwilling to do the same, draw a line under it and know that this is not someone who deserves your time, energy, or emotional investment.
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99pluto · 7 months
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Seventeen as F1 drivers
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So, my bestie and I are both into F1 and we’re carats, and this started as a joke, but I took it seriously. Tbh i don't even know how to use this website, anyway, i had fun with these. Don't take it upfront, it's silly and meant to be funny, not offensive.
Seventeen members as F1 drivers would be:
S.Coups: Michael Schumacher (Ferrari era). Huge crack that makes history ? Well kind of, just like Michael he’d get out of his car to go and beat the shit out of that one mf that crashed into him. No Javi would be in the team anymore, too scared for their life. Kimi Raikkonen type of radios (anger issues). Ultra competitive and would swear as much as Tsunoda.
Jeonghan: Christian Horner. Yes. He is a good tactician deal with it, kinda evil like Horner sometimes, but he’s got as much love to provide to his kids just like Christian with Max. He would start racing but find out he’s even better at managing a team.
Joshua: Sebastian Vettel (not Redbull era). Not Redbull era bc he was (unfairly) disliked (just like Max) at that time, and EVERYONE loves Seb. That’s it, it’s the rule, you like F1 ? You like Seb. You don’t like F1 ? You still like Seb. Unproblematic and engaged king. Also a fucking legend.
Jun: Valteri Bottas (Alfa Romeo era). Unbothered moisturized king that slays. He’s doing his things, he doesn’t care because he knows his worth, you saw him naked and didn’t expect that. Everyone praises him on how he owns his style and he fucking does. Is hilarious when you don’t expect him to be.
Hoshi: George Russell. Iconic, hilarious, massive talent, carried Williams, CARRIED WILLIAMS, nothing to prove cuz he’s one of the best altho the Mercedes is hard to drive, doesn’t complain cuz he’s EXCELLENT and races with an 8th world champion without looking ridiculous next to him.
Wonwoo: Zhou Guanyu. He’s calm and collected, doesn’t make much waves, he’s doing his things and looks good doing them. Good pics, insta feed slays. 
Woozi: Fernando Alonso. Dude will hit retirement age and still be talented, pisses me off. Rarely speaks but spicy and precise comments. Will sometimes mess with your mind, he is clever and knows how to handle himself.
DK: Alex Albon (Williams era). He’s EXCELLENT, is happy with what he has, he got treated badly when he was younger but now he knows his worth. Hard work, a sunshine, hella funny.
Mingyu: Charles Leclerc (Ferrari depressed edition). Huge ass talent (as in Max Verstappen talent, without the father trauma) but does silly mistakes, is also silly. Gets bullied by his own team, basically. Might look cute and all but can get pretty serious, like, fr, he’s talented and SMART.
Minghao: Lewis Hamilton (Mercedes era). Fashion icon, all about healthy soul in a healthy body, ICONIC. He’s just got the Lewis vibe idk like they would be friends i wouldn’t even be surprised.
Seungkwan: Daniel Ricciardo. The official sunshine of F1, the marketing face, everyone wants to meet him because he is so funny, iconic, adorable and he is talented. He carries F1’s image, he is still a sensitive person and can get hurt, so don’t, he has SO much to give and gives with pleasure, don’t hurt him (Br*wn if catch u). No one is more Dani coded than Seungkwan (kinda Seokmin too but had to choose).
Vernon: Carlos Sainz Jr. Mf isn’t part of this world, he’s seing things we don’t, chaotic in a calm way. Looks always hot in an unfair way (i might be biased). Aware of how people perceive him as weird, thinks it’s funny or doesn’t care. Unique laugh, why do they transform into seals when they’re laughing their ass out ???
Dino: Mick Schumacher (post H**s shithole era) or Oscar Piastri. He’s is the future of F1, the boy proved himself, teams literally fought over him. Give him a mediocre car he will still pull some good result although he’s a rookie, update the car and he’s a threat to experienced drivers that have been racing for years. Also Mick personality vibe, fr there’s something. Also very sweet then BOOM, he’s fucking hot.
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hello-nichya-here · 25 days
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How do you feel about Monica and Richard's relationship? Do you think he was her soulmate instead of Chandler?
I think they were a pretty great, adorable couple (Richard trying to find a neurosis of his own to make Monica feel better about her OCD lives rent-free in my head), had a lot of things in common, did their best to work through their relationship issues and the actors had fantastic chemistry. Richard was THE perfect guy for Monica in my eyes... until I saw her fall in love with, date, and marry Chandler, her actual soulmate.
Now, I know a lot of people are creeped out not just by their 21 year age gap, and, more importantly, by the fact that Richard knew her since she was a child because was best friend's with her father (they even say they're like brothers, and at least here in Brazil she'd have absolutely grown up calling him UNCLE Richard).
However:
1 - They're not real, so who cares?
2 - I'm a degenerate and I'm into it.
3 - They did spend years without having any contact (to the point that he doesn't even recognize her at first) and it's very clear that Richard only ever started feeling attracted to her when she was an adult - and not in a "He was waiting to get on her pants the very second she turned 18" kind of way, but rather as "She's literally 27-years-old, she's been a fully grown, adult woman for a LONG time."
And even though Friends, like any sitcom, is known for having the characters in very unrealistic situations for the sake comedy, drama or both (and that's a feature, not a bug) the way Richard and Monica's age difference was handled was pretty realistic.
Monica clearly likes that Richard is this suave, cool older man - but unlike with the rich guy she dates after him, it's obvious that she actually does like him for who he is beyond the superficial stuff, and isn't just giving this relationship a shot because she wants to get married and have kids, and needs a guy to achieve that. I felt soooooo sad for Richard when he was feeling like "one of the guys" then Joey and Chandler let slip that they like hanging out with him because their DADS were not as cool, and Monica was super sweet to him after.
The entire episode of her parents finding out about them on her dad's birthday was freaking amazing, mainly because the writers took full advantage of literally every opportunity for a good joke. Monica is asked if she'll tell them that night, and replies with "Yeah, for my father's birthday I decided to give him a stroke." Their mother asks if they thanked Richard for the ride, innocently just acting like a mom making sure her kids are being polite to their father's friend, and Ross just says "I'm sure Monica thanked him for the both of us." And, of course, everyone awkwardly singing happy birthday right after they had a falling out.
And that episode was also an exemple of Friends, a show that both fairly and unfairly described as very sexist, actually being pretty ahead of it's time when it comes to pointing out the full on misogyny that people often give themselves permission to engage on the very second a girl dates someone much older.
All of the guys are talking about Richard banging a younger woman (that they don't know is Monica) in a really gross way, with her own father even comparing it to the time he bought a cool, expensive car to deal with his mid-life crisis, and, much to both Richard and Ross's horror, suggesting they trade for a day. Sure, it's painting Richard as at least a bit of a loser for dating a younger woman after a long marriage that ended in divorce, but they're still expecting him to brag about it, seeing it as something cool and worth envying him for, and quite literally treating the "mystery younger woman" as an object instead of a person that genuinely cares about him, and that he cares for as well.
The women at the party aren't any better either, making wild assumptions about how Monica is probably just a stupid slut with nothing to offer, and that maybe she's even ugly and the only reason Richard is into her is because she is "Just young enough that everything is still pointing up." They literally know nothing about her beyond "She's younger than him, met him after he got divorced and started dating him" and are all still acting in such a spiteful way that, hearing one of them talk without any context, people could easily assume something like "Oh, she was with Richard first, and this story about him meeting this younger girl after the divorce is bullshit. He met while he was still married, had an affair, filled for divorce, and now the ex-wife hates this girl"
Even Monica's own mother gets all condescending the second she hears her daughter say the word RELATIONSHIP. It all makes for great television because it's a conflict that is not at all forced, makes you really root for the characters' romance to last, and, again, the writers took ALL the opportunities to make jokes about it.
But more importantly, when it was time to make their age gap be the real why they broke up, they didn't do it by turning Monica into an immature moron that was not good enough for him, or retconning Richard's characterization to make him all condescending, arrogant and assuming he knows better just because he's older - or worse, adding a cheap twist that he actually IS a creep that only liked her because she was an adventure/trophy, would cruelly toss her aside the second he got bored, and that he had secretly been screwing younger girls all the time behind his ex-wife's back. NOPE! None of that.
Instead the writers did the smart thing and acknowledged that both Monica and Richard wanted to get married and have kids... but Richard already did it. He got married, had kids, had grandkids, and then got divorced. If he marries Monica now, even if she turns out to be the love of his life and his absolute soulmate he is simply not gonna do all of that again just for her sake, nor should he, because he is in a different state of life and just wants someone to grow old with. It would not be fair of Monica if she tried to force him to have kids again - and it would not be fair of Richard if he expected her to just skip a whole stage of life that she had been super excited for, all because HE already got to have it, enjoy it, and reach the stage where HE was done with it.
And sure, during the drama when Chandler is pretending he will never be interested in marriage and kids, just to surprise Monica with a proposal, they kind of retcon that a bit by having Richard say he regrets that decision and WANTS to have children with her, but I accept that writing choice because:
1 - Literally no one else could fit that role as Chandler's rivals for that storyline without it feeling completely, and it was one of highlights of the last seasons of Friends, aka part of why I'll defend said seasons forever despite the drop in quality.
2 - Richard doesn't seem to have had a truly serious relationship with anyone after Monica because he's clearly not over her, so the pain of seeing her happy with someone else could easily make him start seeing the absolutely correct, but still very difficult choice he made in the past look like THE biggest mistake of his life. When he hear of him later he is not becoming a dad again, so I'll just choose to headcanon that once he found the right person he realized he dodged a bullet when Monica chose Chandler.
3 - Monica did, in fact, choose Chandler. Over Richard. The guy he had been all insecure about, for good reason because Monica would have clearly married him if it wasn't for the not having kids thing, and they had lingering feelings for each other for a looooong time. Her being given the perfect chance to go back to him, and not doing so, is the best way to show to the audience that no, she's not just settling for Chandler because she couldn't have Richard.
4 - Chandler and Richard's talk in which Richard agrees that he already had his chance and that he needs to step aside now because what he is doing isn't fair, Chandler calls him a good guy, and Richard then brags about AND says he hates that is adorable and very funny.
So there you have it. Richard is not Monica's soulmate, but in an AU in which she never met Chandler, or in which they remained purely platonic forever, Richard would be the ONLY acceptable endgame for her because That. Storyline. Was. So. Fucking. Good.
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hopelessrromantix · 1 year
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where i've been
TLDR: Life sucks and so does the government. Half my family got hit with some pricey medical bills plus our normal rent, so donating or sharing this would be beyond appreciated.
I know you’re all thinking “Roman! You haven’t written anything in a month, what’s going on?” First, valid question. Second, dear GOD where do I start.
Let’s keep things simple. This past month has been the literal definition of hell for me. Everything started off fairly normal, until my two remaining grandparents started having frequent hospital trips. My father spent most of his time caring for them, living mostly at their house. Given that he works most in our house, he wasn’t having an easy time. He ended up developing what his doctor said was “stress tremors”, to the point that he went on disability.
Well, even after my grandparents were a bit more stable (though still on close watch)... they continued anyway. Eventually it got so bad my mother drove him to the hospital one night and what do you know, brain tumor.
Queue several days of our family wondering what the everloving fuck we’d do without my Dad. It was several days of my dear mother (note the sarcasm) trying to control everything, my brother trying to continue school, and me taking care of the house and our pets.
We got the scans back not long after and, cue sigh of relief, the tumor was benign. It still seemed to be draining the life out of my father, though. The nurses and doctors were absolutely floored because his tumor was absolutely huge but he had no headaches. Imagine a baseball in your head. Yeah, exactly. He did however stare at the wall for hours and had a hard time getting out more than a few words. It’s probably one of my most heartbreaking memories to watch the strongest person I’ve ever known reduced to a husk on a hospital bed.
Brain surgery came soon after. He made it through and is currently in recovery. He’s speaking actual sentences, though he’s still got tremors and needs a lot of help. Still, I’m just happy to have my father.
That same week, we noticed my cat acting off. We have two of them and my cat, Gallifrey, is a talkative sweetheart who’s attached to me at the hip. But he was meowing differently and acting weird and all around not normal. One vet visit later and we find out he has kidney disease and pancreatitis. He’s being treated for it (new food, possible meds, regular fluid injections, etc.), but he’s still not himself yet. Talk about my life falling apart. This on its own my family couldn’t even begin to afford. The government seems to hate disabled people and paying for numerous doctor’s visits wasn’t remotely in our paper thin budget, much less the meds and treatment.
It was a lot all at once, and not even close to what we expected. Gallifrey is only 7 and my father didn’t show the typical signs of a brain tumor. So, I guess the universe thought “Y’know, this is a perfect time to kick Roman in the fucking balls”.
Routine testosterone blood test, just monitoring… until I got a call from the doctor. Turns out I have some untreated issues that none of my previous doctors caught. In fact, the only reason she caught it was because it was so severe. According to her she was shocked I’m still up and kicking and not in the hospital for a blood transfusion. Apparently my red blood cell count and oxygen level is insanely low, and she asked me to take a Covid test (negative), so it turns out it’s a completely different issue. I’m still in the process of diagnosing it, so that was a fun little addition. With my chronic pain and my mother in denial, I sleep most of the day and am in constant pain the entire time.
I’ll be real, I’m not a fan of asking for money. It’s not something I like, but it’s something I have to do. The amount of treatment we need, my dad, Gallifrey, and me, is more than we can hope to afford on our salaries (thank you, American healthcare!). The medical process in this country is a joke.
I’m asking y’all to help me out. Sharing, donating, whatever. Everyone around me has been kind and supportive, and I'm beyond thankful for that. If you can’t donate, please send it, share it, do whatever, I'll take absolutely anything. If I’m honest? The number I’m asking still won’t cover it, but anything is helpful.
Thank you for reading this far, thank you for sharing, for donating, for being kind, for absolutely everything.
I also understand that the internet is a horrible, despicable place, so I can give any breakdowns of what the money would be used for and give any medical info (not releasing family names or locations) to provide proof. The page includes a lovely little x-ray of my father’s head so you get to see the absolute insanity. If this isn’t enough please let me know and I can link anything else needed to confirm that yes, I am actually having the worst time of my life.
All in all? Thank you.
Donate here if you can <3
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