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#'I literally will not watch something at all unless it fits into one of these 10 extremely specific categories which are all i care about i
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I have a big google doc thing where I keep track of media and stuff (putting everything in loosely ranked categories), which is mostly just for my own reference so I know what tv shows I've already seen before, etc. and I never really look back through it, typically just a quick "okay, watched two movie in the past 8 months, need to quickly slap them somewhere in the lists. okay. done. save document. exit". But today I was actually reading through some of the old notes and there are like... MULTIPLE places where my comment is basically "It would have been good if it were about elves" or "I wish there was a fantasy show made in this same style" or "It's well made, but I just keep thinking about how I would like it more if everyone was an elf or was in old 1700s costumes" or etc like...... lol.... Most biased media ranking system on earth blatantly made by someone with an extremely hyperspecific range of narrow interests. It'd be like if a food reviewer only had 5 foods they actually liked, so they'd just go to a pizza place and be like "eh, the pizza was okay, but I just think it would be better if it was cereal instead. :/ ...2 out of 10"
#Which.. I mean... I am allowed to be biased because literally it's just for my own personal reference (or occasionall#y to send to friends or something if we're discussing the topic) so like.. nowhere am I saying 'I am the god of perfect taste and these#rankings are objectively the absolute truth and everyone should have my same opinion' or anything#BUT still.. it's funny to me sometimes#'Succession would be 100x better if it had the same cast/character quirks and shaky camera style and#acting choices/weird dialogue and general concept etc. EXCEPT it takes place within an elven noble family or something#managing the family business and everyone is in fantasy costumes now'' like.....okay...... but it's NOT that way..soo... thats not the show#''I like the acting style/general tone of Fleabag but i don't care for any of the characters or any of the subject matter and I wish it was#set in the 1800s and had vampires and was about magic instead'' okay..... again... you are making up an entirely new show in that case lol#OR my other beloved typical complaint ''The concept is good but theres too much plot and action and not enough people just sitting#around doing nothing and exposition dumping world and character lore'' ''this needs more goofy sideplots and filler episodes''#''this Drama was too dramatic I think it should be more lighthearted & people need to sit around doing nothing just being weird more often'#''the Action Movie was ok except for the action scenes - which I skipped through all of- but I liked the costumes and worldbuilding'' etc.#ERM sorry your plot has too much plot. also elves have to be included somehow. bye#BUT SERIOUSLY!!!!!! I literally genuinely believe that any show I like (or even dislike) could ALWAYS be improved greatly by#putting people in fantasy or historical costume/setting/etc... why the FUNK would I want to see bland jeans and cars and cell phones#when I could see elaborate velvet cloaks and fantastical landscapes and interior design and innovative takes on historical or#magical technology or etc. etc. etc. I LIVE in the modern day. I see it all the time!!! BORING! stinky!! boo!!!#ANYWAY... another social divide for me.. People love to bond by discussing media. which is hard when I'm like#'I literally will not watch something at all unless it fits into one of these 10 extremely specific categories which are all i care about i#the entire world''.. I say this and yet I still dislike most fantasy or historical things I've watched lol. ok TWO main criteria then!!#it must 1. be in a different world or time period. 2. be goofy silly. Nothing ever has BOTH. It's always overly serious boring drama action#fantasy/history stuff OR it's comedic lighthearted but with modern day characters... WHY.. anguish and woe and so on..#ANYWAY jhjnk... at least I can make that divide. Some people seem to project their own personal preferences and get really emotionally#defensive if you say you didn't like something - as if the fact that they DO like it is some Objective Truth or something rather than just#opinion/preference based. I can still easily say ''this is well made/well written/acted/good in a technical sense/has a lot of#points of appeal that most people would be drawn to/etc'' and admit that it's a GOOD show probably. I just PERSONALLY think its#bad because my tastes are very narrow. Some things ARE actually made badly but. things are not bad INHERENTLY just bc they dont suit ME lol#Better to recognize/accept whats odd about you and be peacefully aware of it than just being mad at everyone all the time for not fully#agreeing with you even when you're the one with the Weird opinion in that case lol.. I am right though :3 but.. lol... still. i get it
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opens-up-4-nobody · 7 months
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...
#head instructor to the TAs in the lab section i TA for: how r u guys feeling abt the workload?#me who hasnt graded anything since week 1 and spent an hr that morning filling out a patient safety plan: 🙃#listen. we r experiencing symptoms that make us shitty at our job. which is not helpful for a positive outlook#i was also experiencing horrible cramps at the time bc i lost my ibuprofen and 2 days ago i stopped the birth control in a desperate effort#to stop feeling terrible. but in this moment i feel alright. its wild to go from drastically unhappy to like lol wtf was that? anyway stop#being a bby loser. for no obvious reason. im gonna start the birth control again to see if i get depressed again or if that was just me lol#i dont think my therapist understands the depth of my executive functioning issues tho. bc im a grad student and can meet deadlines. like#let me tell u im a fucking disaster abt starting things. i will go back and forth and get nothing done forever. or i do things halfway and#make everything 30 times more difficult later bc no one else understands how my brain works#ah well. itll b fine. sometimes i just get freaked out that i wanna b better and i dont kno how to do that. so i spiral in despair a lil#ill b fine. im good at catching myself before i get too out of control. annoyingly tho i am not currently beating the bip0lar allagations#bc whatever tf is wrong with me i do probably fit the diagnostic criteria for bip0lar 2. i dont kno y that freaks me out so much. i guess#its bc it feels like something i cant just make better thru force of will and i grew up in a home that was very obsessively#health conscious to the point my dad gets anxious abt taking a single ibuprofen. so like ive been conditioned to get freaked out by#medication. literally my grandma will call me and tell me to b suspicious of doctors and to not take medicine unless absolutely necessary.#like lady u r the genetic reason i have 0cd shut the fuck up. also it feels like something that would more negatively affect how ppl think#of u than saying oh yea i get depressed or i have anxiety. like the connotation feels worse im used to just telling ppl whatever tf#my problem is. so the idea of holding something back feels weird. which annoys me bc i dont think there should b so much of a stigma. its#bullshit. anyway idk. im tired. i was trying to think of a comfort tv show with my therapist and all i could think was the terror#when im depressed i wanna watch those English mother fuckers suffer and die. i just lov that show so much. harry g00dsir my beloved. the#most me coded character to ever exist#unrelated
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puppyeared · 2 years
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weird that the shape of love is two beating hearts glued together and not two hands holding each other
#well technically it comes from the shape of two hearts sewn together but i dont know how that translates to romance.. literally its kinda#disturbing but symbolically i guess it is kind of sweet#my friend and i were talking and she said something about someone saying a lover cant just be a friend you can kiss but i think i disagree#i kind of think the point of a lover IS a friend you can kiss because like it must get exhausting having to convince yourself you can only#feel romantic things towards your lover right? i mean i dont know if my feelings are shaped like anyone else's so maybe its more of a case#by case basis. for me id like someone whose hand i can hold and i can make pancakes for them and maybe kiss but like not strictly romantic#and not strictly platonic. and my feelings are all over the place because one day ill be really into someone i like and another day ill be#really chill about it. so its hard to say what i feel for someone if its always changing#maybe thats why i think lovers should be friends you can kiss because its coming from my way of feeling? hmmm#like i want to be able to say i love you and mean it romantically one day and then say love you in a platonic way the next day and itd be#ok?? does that make sense??? like i know its the same phrase but its like the feeling i put with it is different each time. idk#its why i find dating someone hard because its constantly going up and down and its never balanced. itd probably really confusing unless i#were to date someone whose feelings works the same way. just some food for thought i guess but then again every relationship needs work#im not sure if that fits into the category of work though.. i cant tell myself what im going to feel#it just happens and theres not much i can really do about it except tell that person what im feeling. hnnnnnhhgh#maybe its better if i just stick to watching fictional couples work it out lmao#yapping#txt
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cameronspecial · 3 months
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Let Me Prove You Wrong, Angel
Pairing: Frat!Rafe Cameron x Reader
Warnings: Insecurities About Weight Gain
Pronouns: She/Her
Word Count: 0.8K
Summary: After finding out her dress doesn't fit, Y/N starts to feel insecure and Rafe wants to get rid of those thoughts.
A/N: Insipred by this post.
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Y/N doesn’t feel insecure often. With someone like Rafe around, it is hard to feel that way with his constant praise. One sight at the doubt of her brilliance and he would literally shut down the whole world until she realized she was the best person ever to exist. As she gets ready for a date with him, she tries zipping up the zipper of her dress, yet it won’t budge. She grows frustrated at the lack of advancement, concluding that she won’t be able to do so because she must have gained some weight. Tears start to bubble at the corner of her eyes, more so that the dress that she adores is no longer in commission for her than the actual weight. It was the dress she wore on her first date with Rafe and she knew how much he loved the dress. She didn’t realize she was taking so long to get dressed until Rafe came up to check on her. Finding his angel on the ground crying is the scariest thing to him. He has no idea what happened or if she is hurt. He rushes to her side and brings her onto his lap. He brushes her hair behind her ear with a kiss on her cheek, “What’s wrong, Angel? Are you hurt?” “No, my dress doesn’t fit anymore,” she whimpers, shoving her head into his neck. He looks at the fallen dress on the floor, “It’s okay. We can pick out another dress for you to wear tonight.” “If that one doesn’t fit, then I doubt the others are going to fit,” she argues. 
“Well, then I’ll cancel our reservations. We can order the greasiest foods I can find and watch the After movies you’ve been wanting to watch.” 
“No, I have to go on a diet. I’ve gotten fatter.” 
Rafe immediately pushes away to look her in the eyes and shakes his head. “No. No. No. Don’t say it like that, Angel. I won’t say that you gained weight or not because we won’t know unless we use a scale, which we aren’t going to do. So we don’t know if the dress doesn’t fit because it shrank or something,” he begins. “But even if you are the reason the dress doesn’t fit, then it doesn’t matter. Because you will still be the most amazing girl in the world. Do you know that it’s been proven the more you gain weight after entering the relationship, the happier you are in it? Weight fluctuation is a perfectly normal thing.” Her head moves from side to side, “If it’s normal then how come you didn’t gain weight too? Are you not happy in our relationship?” “I am ecstatic about our relationship and I can’t tell you why I haven’t gained weight, but if it would make you happy, then I would gain all the pounds in the world to show you how happy I am,” he responds, tucking her back into his side with a kiss to her forehead. She giggles a little, “No, you don’t need to gain weight for me. If you gained all the pounds in the world, I would be worried about your health. I’m just disappointed you won’t be able to give me piggyback rides anymore.” “I will never stop being able to give you piggyback rides,” he scoffs, falling back so he is lying flat on the ground.
He turns her so she is perpendicular against his chest and his hands go under her body. “What are you doing?” she questions at the sudden change of position. He pushes upward, “Let me prove you wrong, Angel.” Y/N is suddenly in the air thanks to his hand movement. His arms don’t even shake a little bit as he leaves her there for a few seconds before he brings his arms back so they are bent. He continues to bring her open and down in his reps until she ceases the point he is trying to make. “Okay. Okay. I get the point. Can you put me down now, please? I’m starting to get lightheaded,” she begs. He brings her back down so she is straddling his hips. “I will always be able to give you piggyback rides and then the moment that I am not going to be able to is when I am going to be a hundred years old with fragile little bones,” he promises, kissing her lips. 
She nods, “I believe you. Can we get something to eat now? I’m hungry.” “Of course, Let’s get some burgers. I want to see how pretty you look wearing my shirt and sweatpants and those are definitely not appropriate for the restaurant,” he informs. He shrugs off his suit jacket and goes to his dresser to get them a change of clothes. 
———
The next day, when she gets back from class, she finds about ten new dresses in her closet. They are all identical to the one she couldn’t put on yesterday, just five are sizes bigger and the others are sizes smaller. She picks up the note on the one that is a size up from her original dress. So you can always wear your favourite dress. I can easily order more if you need them because there is an infinite of these dresses out there, but only one you. I love you, Angel.
Taglist: @winterrrnight @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @wickedlovely121 @thepatriarchykeychain @drewsmusee @starkowswife @maybankslover @forstarkey @loving-and-dreaming
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jakei95 · 9 months
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[Post in English] Something Nyx and I want to publicly address, regarding the recent allegations in the Glitchtale Crew's Discord Server and it's moderators. I really apologize for the upcoming wall of text. These are our Twitter threads I have pasted them here, in case you don't have access to said platform. I have also added some additional notes to provide more context. All details under the line:
NyxTheShield: (Transcription from his official twitter thread) I read some mean comments lately and I just wanna be super clear: I havent been related to Glitchtale since at least 2022. I never considered myself part of the community and went through some much shit while doing stuff for it that my mental health was completely destroyed.
For people who thought I was an admin of the server, that was just in paper. I was constantly de-admin'd, demodded and kicked from the server through the years for simple stuff like asking the rest of the mod team to not say slurs or standing up against the Midnight Crew. I personally left the server for a long while because I really did not want to be around some of the people there. All of this happened years ago (from 2016~ to around 2020). On the early years, my full income came from Youtube/Glitchtale. I was a broke college student and my economic stability depended on it. Despite this, and making literally hundred of tracks and hours of music for the series, most of the income came from my own ad revenue. I was paid less than 2000 USD for all of the work. Essentially, I was paid in exposure.
This wouldn't have been an issue for me if at least I got to keep my artistic vision with the series. That didn't hold true for long.
From the second season and onwards, and in multiple instances, I would score the entire OST for the episode, watch the episode when it released, and then find out a completely new section of the episode (usually a battle scene) with music from somebody else This was completely demotivating to me because I wasn't being paid, the tracks would not fit the rest of the OST at all, and most of the income I made from the battle scenes. I had to work for weeks trying to compose music for glorified powerpoint presentations (Basically everything that's not a battle scene on the series was just still frames of characters barely moving) and do all the heavy lifting and I wasn't even let known about the guest tracks.
This added to the feeling of having absolutely no power within the community. I don't know if this was intentional or not (I don't wanna presume malice), but all of these things together contributed to me distancing myself from the community.
Honestly, there is A LOT more shit that went down these early years that are extremely traumatic to me that I would prefer to not talk about unless completely necessary, but I feel this is a good amount of context for what I wanna talk about next.
As you might be aware, extremely serious (and true) allegations were made against Camila and his partner, Veir, which was accused of grooming minors from 2015 to 2021 There are really good videos out there explaining the entire timeline of what transpired, but I specifically wanna talk about 2020.
(Jakei's note: Links to said videos are here: [1] [2] [3])
In that year, a public document was made by my head mod CrystalFlame alongside 2 other mods in the GT server, that exposed Veir and their actions. This document went mostly unnoticed. Even more, Crystal went through a lot of abuse for coming forward about their abuse and was almost ostracized from the UT AU community because of this.
Because of this, I was asked directly by one of the victims (and also representing the other victims) to please not speak up (Citing that they just wanted to move on and didn't want to involve themselves with more problems and expose themselves)
All the info was kept very vague from me, including the people who were involved, the extent of the stuff that went down, etc But I knew enough to know it was serious. I followed their request and didn't speak up publicly about this, but I banned Veir from my server, warned all of my mods and people close to me in those circles about Veir, and constantly tried to get Camila to please adress the situation. Despite this, she did not listen and we all know how stuff went down later in 2022, where the allegations came back again with full force. This time around I wasnt asked to stay silent so I spread the word around and confronted the entire mod team. I was shortly banned after that.
I needed to address this because this thing has been eating me alive for years. I was intentionally kept in the dark about a lot of context and nuance that would have completely changed my mind about speaking up or not about what happened in 2020.
Everything is easier in retrospective, and with the knowledge I now have about the situation I know for a fact that I would have spoken up about all that happened. But being asked directly to not speak up by the victims was something that goes against what I am Sorry for the long rant, but I really needed to get this off my chest. I am tired of having to deal with this kind of stuff. As a content creator/public figure I am trying my hardest to keep the communities I am active in as safe as possible.
I feel I could have done more for the Glitchtale community regarding the grooming situation, but all of the years of abuse that I endured really fucked up my judgement. I am not very good at dealing with people and I always trust the people close to help me for this kind of stuff
Sadly, in this case, those same people who were close to me were also the victims, so they couldnt have known or had a way to help me out, I should have helped them instead. Most if not all of what was described in this thread is backed up by screenshots, chat logs, and direct testimony from the people who were involved during this time.
I don't want to direct hate to anyone or start a witchhunt, I am doing this purely to decompress a bit and try to vent some of the trauma I experienced all these years.
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Jakei: (Transcription from my official twitter thread) I would also like to share my experiences about my relationship with the Glitchtale Creator, Camila Cuevas. Publicly, we appeared as close friends, but in reality, that friendship was based on bullying and mistreatment, and this affected my mental health deeply.
Years have passed, and the memories still cause me pain. I decided to remain silent, but after the revelations of grooming cases in her community, I realized I wasn’t being too sensitive. The time has come to speak up about my experiences.
During the early years of Underverse, I was dealing with a serious depressive episode. Simultaneous internal and external pressures as an independent artist amplified my mental strain. Meeting Camila felt like finding a genuine friend who shared my passion for the fandom and understood the struggles of being a content creator amidst toxicity. At my lowest, I became compliant to doing things that I didn’t want to, just to keep people around me happy. For Camila, this meant allowing her to belittle my work and make me the butt of her jokes.
Only our veteran followers may remember the 'roasting games' between us on Tumblr (consisting of mutual insults), a spectacle where she'd always win. However, it was a game she privately forced me to "play" and I ended up accepting, despite the discomfort it caused me. These 'games' would give her a cool and strong image in the fandom while painting me as the dumb, 'cringe-worthy' friend. In essence, I became her personal punching bag, unknowingly reinforcing his reputation.
Camila's favorite term to demean my series 'Underverse' was “Cancerverse”. It felt like a constant contest where she'd always position herself as the superior writer and animator simply because my story and animation techniques didn't fit her standards. Years of being subjected to her ridicule left my self-esteem in ruins. I was okay with the negative feedback by some fans, but when my 'friend' publicly disrespected my art, it made me question my abilities as an artist.
I can't deny there were times when she gave me advice to deal with hate or hurtful comments. However, her damaging comments and treatment outweighed those moments of support.
My depressive state worsened around July 2017, where I had accepted people pushing me to do things I wasn’t comfortable with, while being part of Camila's demeaning games, just to appease her ego. I was introduced to Nyx during this time, he offered his music for my series, and eventually we started dating. We met in person in Chile, where I also met Camila. I hoped our friendship would strengthen but everything felt the same. Before I moved to Chile with Nyx, Camila reached out to me in dms, attempting to turn me against him because he opposed the use of slurs in the GT server. She claimed Nyx was being 'brainwashed' by his American friends belonging to the black and LGBTQ+ communities. She made fun of my dating choices, suggesting I was entering a toxic relationship, while showing off her relationship with her then-boyfriend (later exposed as a pedophile). She even quoted her own mother assuring me that Nyx would 'get back to normal', and if it didn’t happen, she would let me live in her house, almost like if she was telling me that Nyx would hurt me or make me feel miserable.
It only took Nyx 3 months to realize that the GT server was going in the wrong way. I initially felt compelled to defend Camila due to my inferiority complex, but soon realized Nyx was right. (Jakei's note: Not only Nyx was right, a lot of people that called her out over the years were right, yet they were not listened to at the time)
Even then, I found it difficult to distance myself from Camila due to the false sense of obligation I felt towards her. My fear of her making fun of my work kept me from interacting with others in the short period of time I stayed in her Discord server. I was afraid that she and her echo chamber would talk behind my back, something that I found out was happening in private chats until recent years.
Rebuilding my self-esteem wasn't an easy task. I began noticing the red flags – Camila's lack of respect not only for me but Nyx also, the emotional manipulation Nyx was suffering from Veir (something he used to do all the time with his other victims), her attempts to 'roast' me in front of her family and fans in the Underverse/Glitchtale meetings, and her constant criticism of my artstyle not being compatible to hers in the few collabs we made.
All these 'small' instances, dismissed as insignificant by many, caused me immense pain while treating my depression. I felt it was too late to express how I felt, as I feared being labeled as attention-seeking or oversensitive by her and her fanbase. Ironically, the moment she talked about her traumas after being bullied in the past, her feelings were the only ones that mattered any time she was involved in a problematic situation in the fandom and deserved to be the only to get pats in the back.
I never expected a sincere apology, as I was convinced she didn't remember or didn't care about the hurt she caused. I tried to maintain a facade of good terms with her, both publicly and privately. Eventually, I distanced myself from her, unfriending her and banning her from my own server even if she didn't interact there. I started focusing on my own work and the people who appreciated it. Despite this, the aftermath of the bullying continued to affect me.
Everything fell into place when the grooming accusations against her former boyfriend and server mods came to light. It was a shocking revelation, but it validated all my doubts and fears about her. The purpose of sharing my experiences is not to stir up drama, but to address the concerns of those worried about my association with Camila. I want to make it clear that I will never tolerate such behavior. Although the things I did for her in the past cannot be erased, I hope Camila at least deletes the animation remake I did for her and all the collabs that boosted her views for free, though I'm not optimistic about it happening.
As I've matured, my hope is that she and her crew learn from their mistakes, start behaving like adults, and take responsibility for their actions in their future projects and with their new followers. But I'm skeptical about any real change, especially if their server continues to exist. The best course of action for me was to cut all ties with Camila and Glitchtale.
NyxTheShield (now my husband) and I have endured too much from our treatment by Camila. We no longer want to be associated with her or Glitchtale. It's a chapter of our lives that we wish to close. It's time for us to focus on recovering our mental health, as remaining silent is only prolonging our pain. We have been working to improve our mental and physical health over the past few years and this is a crucial part of our healing process.
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xxsabitoxx · 10 months
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My Personal Upper Moon 🍆 Ranking
Warnings: if it isn’t obvious already, this post is taking about the Upper Moon’s and my personal HC on their dick sizes. If that makes you uncomfortable in any way, just keep scrolling
A/N: I was actually very surprised by the amount of comments on my Hashira version of this HC post. So I feel a little more comfortable with giving the Upper Moons a go, especially since someone asked if I would do it eheheh. That being said, these men are demons, therefore you may find my size rankings to be a bit unrealistic. But I’m not gonna go crazy and say Muzan has a dick that’s 2 miles long.
This post includes: Muzan, Kokushibo, Douma, Akaza, Hantengu’s clones (Karaku, Urogi, Sekido and Aizetsu), Gyutaro and Kaigaku. And no Gyokko cause that man doesn’t have a dick, period.
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In a category of his own: Muzan Kibutsuji
Muzan clearly deserves a category of his own for one particular reason: he’s able to alter his appearance.
Therefore, he’s able to change the size of his dick whenever the fuck he feels like it.
And don’t try and say that stupid cause he can literally change gender and age so changing his dick size isn’t out of the question
On average, Muzan prefers to have a larger dick, mostly because he’s a pussy ass bitch man that needs that kind of confidence down there, if you get what I mean.
Typically soft: 10.5
Typically hard: 11.7
But he can make it as big, small, curved, wide, as he wants
When he wants to torture your ass, he’ll make himself as girthy as he sees fit just to watch you cry and squirm and beg for something a little smaller.
Anytime you get “comfortable” he just increases his girth until you’re crying again. Your pleasure is never his first priority, it’s always his.
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1. Kokushibo
Among the demons, it should be no shock that Upper Moon One has always been packing. This man is petrifying so it’s only right that his dick is equally as intimidating as him
Even as a human, this man’s dick was deadly. You can’t change my mind either.
Just in case you’re wondering, Yoriichi is bigger
That’s beside the point, Kokushibo has a lot to work with down there. Whether it’s hard or soft ngl
When soft: 9.5
When hard: 10.7
He’s long, girthy and curves slightly upwards. He’s heavy too, your jaw will certainly hurt by the time you’re done with him.
He’s the type to put a pillow or blanket of some sort under your lower back as he fucks you. Mostly because he’s not clueless to the fact that his dick is big
Kokushibo is the type to ease you into it though, he’s stern but he has a teeny bit of empathy when it comes to fucking you. Unless you’ve pissed him off ofc.
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2. Akaza
I know this one is gonna be controversial, especially since I’m putting him above Douma but hear me out.
This man has audacity, which means he got a big dick. No demon is acting like Akaza and having a small dick to go with it. Nuh uh, no sir.
Akaza is sitting pretty knowing damn well his cock is bigger than Douma’s and it actually something Douma taunts him with… which you think the roles would be reversed but hey…
When soft: 8.5
When hard: 9.7
He’s straight, no real curve to him and he has a single blue line going up the underside of his shaft and one that wraps around just before the head of his dick. Like as in the lines that cover his body lol
Akaza is probably the “gentlest” of all the upper moons because of the respect he has for women
That’s not to say he isn’t rough with you, but he definitely cares about your pleasure and feelings more than Douma or Muzan would for example
He’s pretty confident in himself though, at least that’s how it seems to you. He knows what he’s doing to say the least
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3. Douma
Alright listen, this man is still packing down there so don’t get mad at me for putting him at third.
His dick is smaller than Akaza’s but not by a ton. Let’s be honest Douma is probably the straightest and gayest demon to ever exist. The embodiment of bisexual LMAO
How does Douma know Akaza’s dick is bigger? The world may never know
When soft: 8
When hard: 9.2
It’s pale like the rest of him, a pretty noticeable curve to it as well. He has some prominent veins because of how pale he is. His tip is like a pinkish gray (idk why I felt the need to include this)
He’s pretty girthy too, so he definitely will make your walls stretch uncomfortably if he doesn’t offer you foreplay
Douma is rough, selfish and truly only cares about his own pleasure but he likes watching you whine and squirm while being impaled on his cock
Douma also has a thing for “belly bulges” so he will fuck you in some odd positions if he means he can see his dick from the outside… if ya know what I mean
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4. Gyutaro
Listen, plz just listen cause I promise you I’m going somewhere with this. Cause I can already hear y’all being like ???Scrawny ass Gyutaro is in 4th??? Yes. He is.
Gyutaro got himself a bit of an upgrade when becoming a demon. He for sure does not look like he did a a human. By that I mean he’s taller than he was (even tho he’s hunched)
What I’m tryna get at is demon transformation made his dick bigger and Imma live in my little fantasy world
When soft: 6.5
When hard: 7.2
Gyutaro’s dick is as curved as his spine and as thick as his tiny ass waist. He’s got length but not crazy girth.
Even if he’s rough, it feels good. Like there isn’t a ton of discomfort if he goes in raw with no prep cause he wants to punish you, he’s like the perfect amount of stretch
He’s mean, verbally and physically but at the same time he’s a fucking sucker for your body so he can’t really say much without whining and groaning
He’s got some confidence in his cock but he’s also a bit envious of the other upper moons
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5. The Hantengu Clones (Sekido, Karaku, Aizetsu, Urogi)
I’ve talked about my dick HCs for these four in my A-Z NSFW alphabet and I was tryna be realistic. However, when it comes to this post, fuck being realistic.
Sekido when soft 6.2 | when hard 7.1
Karaku when soft 6 | when hard 6.9
Urogi when soft 5.9 | when hard 6.7
Aizetsu when soft 5.7 | when hard 6.5
There is so much to say here but honestly my brain is malfunctioning so I can’t even delve into it
Regardless, the four of these demons fuck very differently and use their dicks very differently
Sekido and Urogi have no curve, Karaku has a slight curve and Aizetsu’s curves upwards
Hantengu himself had a 3 inch dick and you can’t tell me otherwise. Pussy ass bitch
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6. Kaigaku
I hate this little bitch but I’m including him so I can rag on his fugly ass. Kaigaku simps I’m sorry but I can’t stand him
This douche has the smallest dick among the upper moons. This is full Kaigaku slander.
When soft: 5.2
When hard: 6
I’ll give him a decent dick tho cause boy does he have the fucking audacity
That’s all I’m gonna give y’all cause I ain’t wasting my time on him GOOD BYE I didn’t even tag is ass
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sixosix · 5 months
Note
heyooo!! can I request Izuku when his fingers accidentally brush against the readers??? And they grab his hand and he gets all flustered <333 sorry I just can’t get this scenario out of my head!! He’s so silly!! /pos
a/n omf i cant believe my izuku readers r still alive… i havent caught up in the manga since forever so if theres anything wrong, thats why LOL i missed izuku so much T__T, wc 1k
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Izuku is guarding a terrible, terrible secret. One that he wouldn’t even admit if his classmates roped him into an intense game of Truth or Dare, unless drunk, probably. Which will never happen.
Class 1-A Dorms roars with laughter. Izuku swears he can feel the building shaking as the students occupying the vast space of the living room burst into another fit of cackles. The other building could probably hear it, and they’d get a noise complaint the next morning, from 1-B, no less.
They’re watching a movie. Comedy, perhaps; Izuku wasn’t paying much attention when they were picking, but he could pick up the clues of what the characters on screen are saying, his classmates jostling his shoulders as they giggle, and, of course, the same mp3 laugh track that plays for the rest of the film.
Izuku is tucked into the far corner of the couch, squished between Todoroki and Uraraka. Uraraka laughs with her whole body, her head thrown back as she claps in delight. Todoroki laughs once, a huff of amusement, just a curl of his lips.
And on the floor, nestled between where Izuku dutifully keeps his knees spread so as to not hurt, sits you—the whole reason why Izuku is struggling to focus on the movie in the first place.
He’s eternally grateful that keeping the lights dim while watching films is a thing, or else everyone would’ve long noticed his burning face. He looks like a strawberry, and feels like a strawberry left under the sun. Todoroki had cast him a glance, vague amusement playing on his stoic face. Izuku wanted to dig a hole and bury himself in there forever.
“Sorry, Izuku,” you say, loud enough to be heard over the film but quiet enough that it’s only shared between the two of you. He wills his legs not to jump up in surprise. “Can I just lay for a bit? I’m getting kinda sleepy.”
“No problem,” Izuku says after a beat, managing to not fuck up and stammer embarrassingly in front of you. Or should it be behind you?
You tilt your head upward, meeting his eyes. “Thank you.”
“Y-Yes. I mean, you’re welcome.” Dammit.
Izuku breathes a sigh of relief when your attention is promptly stolen by the laugh track, and Kaminari yelps a cackle.
He catches something from the corner of his eye, paling at the sight of a terrifying expression on Uraraka’s face. If devils had round eyes and rounder cheeks, smiling in a way that fits their nature, it would be a picture of evilness Uraraka is portraying at this moment.
He squints inquisitively at her.
Uraraka grins. “Your hand,” she whispers, then does something he can’t quite figure out.
Confused, Izuku shows her his hand, scars and all.
Uraraka looks unimpressed, and Izuku wilts. He can’t hear her properly, with the movie picking up pace and sound effects. Uraraka makes a grand demonstration of splaying her hand and resting it on the crown of her hair, then gestures wildly at your head. 
As soon as understanding dawns on Izuku, his face feels drained of blood, horrified. “No,” he mouths desperately. “No.” Again, for good measure.
“Yes,” she mouths back, taking matters into her own hands by quite literally taking his hand and moving to place it on your head. But he panics and jostles your hands resting on his lap instead.
Izuku pales. The characters in the movie shriek. “Sorry,” he squeaks out, then glares at Uraraka, who’s holding in her laughter.
He heaves a heavy breath when you cast him a curious glance.
“You—Sorry, I, my hand—No, I mean, I didn’t mean to do that,” he blurts uselessly, waving his arms around in a desperate attempt to hide his face, which is surely the same shade as anything red.
What the hell, his brain hisses. Izuku, you idiot, you’ve done it now.
He watches with bated breath as you take his hand instead of laughing at his face. He watches as you lace your fingers with his instead of seeing your face scrunch up in disgust. His heart flutters, threatening to fly off his chest and into the shared warmth of your hands.
Instead, he deflates like a red balloon, his mouth forming words that sound like nitpicking vowels from a series of keyboard smashes.
“I don’t mind,” you say. “Relax. I want you to hold me.”
It’s a little hard to relax when your words float around in his mind like a broken record.
Once the movie ends and the noise subsides, his classmates collectively keep their messes—namely, the thrown popcorn and spilled soda on the carpet—and return to their rooms. But Izuku can’t do that, not when he has a Y/N who is still resting against his lap.
He waves goodbye at Uraraka and Iida, the former making kissy faces and Iida solemnly sending him his prayers.
Izuku resigns himself to his fate, sighing softly. Well, despite everything, he likes the fact that you never once let go of his hand.
“I like your hands,” you say, as if answering his thoughts. Izuku jolts and can’t help it because he thought you were asleep.
“You… do?”
Izuku thinks his hands are ugly, scars running all the way to his shoulders like protruding veins. He hates seeing it.
“I do,” you say, squeezing it tenderly. “I’m glad it’s still together and working after all you’ve done to it. I like them.”
Izuku bites his bottom lip, harsh enough that it’s nearly drawing blood, lest he says something stupid like, ‘I like you’. He doesn’t, thankfully. Yet it’s there, on the tip of his tongue. If you asked him what’s on his mind, he would’ve said it.
But he guards his secret a little while longer and hopes that someday he’ll be able to share it with you.
“Thank you,” he murmurs, finding the courage to squeeze your hand. Much to his delight, you do it back and smile. He’s melting. “Can we, uhm, stay here for a bit?”
You laugh, rising from your position. Izuku nearly panics and holds you down because he doesn’t want to lose this moment just yet. But he finds himself stunned when you settle beside him and rest your head against his shoulder instead. “Sleep,” you say. “We’ll stay here for a bit.”
“O-Okay, yeah,” he whispers, reaching for your hand once more.
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prettyoatmeal · 1 year
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MORE John Price Headcanons While You're Dating
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Part 2 to this!
Since SO many people (like 4) were asking for me to do a part 2, here it is! Enjoy! A/N at the end!
Genre: Fluff! Smut after the buffer.
Summary: Just some more headcanons I've thought of. GN reader, no mentions of Y/N.
Content Warnings: NSFW After buffer.
Masterlist here!
***************
Big big big big boy.
He's quite muscular, got that meat on him (I mean, hell. Look at those shoulders). This means he needs to buy pretty large sized clothing for himself when he's out shopping.
This also means that they're a perfect size for you, able to very easily slide into a shirt of his and just wear that with how long it is on you.
They're just so comfy and baggy and cover you up so well, they're nice for when you don't feel like wearing something form fitting or if yours are in the wash.
John would definitely approve.
They'd smell like him, like home, how could you not wear them every now and again?
If you asked really nicely, John would get you a personal travel bottle of his cologne to keep on you at all times.
If you two are deployed, then he'd definitely pack a few extra shirts and sweaters of his because he knows you'll want some with you in the barracks. Maybe sleep in them or use them as a pillow case.
Seeing you in his clothes would definitely rile him up, seeing how the shirt gathers around your hips especially would leave a lasting effect on him. Expect his hands to be all over you.
You'd get the same reaction from him from wearing something more form fitting.
Wearing something that hugs your curves and shows off how great you look?
Oh boy.
It would drive him mad.
Would purposefully buy you shirts or those bike shorts in a half size too small and blame it on forgetting your size or being an 'accident' just to watch you try them on and gaze how the fabric squeezes around your chest and thighs.
Would definitely get heart eyes from that.
"John, are you sure this is my size?" as you finally pull the shirt over your chest, feeling how constricting the fabric is.
"Is or isn't, you look divine!"
If you wear a proper compression shirt, he'd probably die on the spot.
please please please please wear one.
No matter how thick or thin you are, he'd love every bit of how you look, and he'd definitely make that well known to you.
Definitely the kind to love playing with your hair, especially if it's long. He'd love braiding it, brushing it, running his fingers through it, literally anything,
Loves feeling how soft it is right after you wash it.
Will probably offer to help you dry it.
"Allow me," typa guy for sure.
He'd also be very big on communication.
He's had a lot of experience and has realised that bottling feelings up and keeping them locked away can only make the situations worse.
If you notice he's particularly upset, would always vent to you (If you're comfy w that of course) just to get how he's feeling out of the way, hoping it won't interfere with anything else.
Not one to pull the silent treatment, in fact, he hates it. If you're the kind to pull the silent treatment, he would egg it out of you one way or another.
"I'm too old for this, spit it out," in the kindest way possible.
He knows how draining it is physically and mentally to keep your emotions to yourself, so he'd always convince you to finally let it all loose.
Please tell him how you're feeling, especially if he's the person you're upset with. It breaks his heart seeing you upset and will 100% do everything in his power to make the situation right again.
The type to get grumpy or emotional when he's sleepy. Sometimes he just needs a soft chest or soft tummy to lay his head on and he'll be out like a light.
If you would let him sleep on top of you, that is. All that muscle would be pretty heavy so unless he knew you could take it, little spoon would do just fine for him.
Yeah, he'd love being little spoon. Loves feeling your arms pulling him deeper into your chest.
John is pretty dominant in a traditional sense, very masculine, a fierce leader, knows exactly what he wants and how he's going to get it, but he's also a massive softie and will do anything and everything to have your full attention when he's in the mood.
Yes, he wants to be little spoon, yes, he will also lead an army of men through a battlefield. They exist.
__________________
NSFW
He's an ass man, 100%.
Y'know how I said he'll 'accidentally' buy smaller sizes just to see how the material so perfectly forms itself to your curves?
Yeah, this is why.
Will grab and slap your ass at every chance he gets (with your consent, ofc) even in the most innocent of situations.
Whether you're bending down to pick up something you've dropped, over the kitchen counter while pulling something down from the top shelves, or just leaning over the dinner table to wipe it down, SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! Jolting you forward.
Loves to hear that high pitched, surprised shriek coming from your mouth at the sudden impact of his hand on your behind.
Backshots with him would be crazy, fingers intertwined with your hair, pushing your face into the mattress as he pounds into you from behind.
Doggy or reverse cowgirl would be his favourite positions because he just gets that full view of your ass jiggling with each bounce or each thrust from his hips.
Definitely wouldn't be gentle, but wouldn't be too rough either, that perfect balance.
Maybe a bit rougher when he's desperate or releasing some pent up stress, but all in all, he wouldn't dare to hurt you unless its the very occasionally slap on the ass or thighs.
I feel like it would be out of his comfort zone as well. Seeing how prominent his hand prints can be after spanking, seeing them on your face or anywhere else would probably make him upset during the process.
Spanking would be the furthest he'd go, making sure the skin is red and raw.
Would stop if he notices you're crying. Breaks his heart.
On the contrary, will gladly make you cry with his head between your legs. Feeling how you twitch against his mouth every time he makes you cum brings a smile to his lips.
VERY focused on making you cum first. Very focused on making sure you're comfortable ad satisfied all the way.
Definitely prefers to be dominant in bed, likes having that control.
Daddy kink probably.
He probably wouldn't make too much noise in bed, maybe a few groans and whines. But would for sure be a dirty talker.
"Yeah, that feels good, doesn't it?"
"Sucking daddy's cock- fuck, -so well, Gorgeous.."
"So fucking tight, aint ya. Mmh, fuck, keep squeezing around me like that, Dove."
Will only let out a classic moan for when he cums.
"That's it, gonna fill you up so good- ahh~!"
Surprising at first since he'd never made all that much sound before but the more you know.
Its totally hot though.
King of aftercare, tbh.
Would gladly carry you everywhere after you've become too sore to walk anywhere yourself.
Even if you can walk after a pounding, will still carry you. Gotta be treated like royalty after letting him slam into your holes like that.
Boy, did it feel good.
***************
I somehow accidentally deleted the first draft of this I made so this turned out a lot shorter than I first wanted it to :(
Also why it took so long lol. I swear, idk why my Tumblr is bugging so much but losing like 2k words after I've worked on it all day literally broke my heart.
Probably don't expect a part 3, but after having a few days to myself, my motivation has defo returned haha.
Goodnight!! <33
Tags: @mind-nine @tapioca-marzipan @underthestarwars @avalkyrieofparis
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muddyorbsblr · 6 months
Text
remote consults behind enemy lines [kinktober 2023: formal wear…and role play(?)]
See the full Kinktober 2023 Collection here! 'one look and they'll know' collection masterlist See my full list of works here!
Placement: 2020, during the filming of Loki Season 1
Summary: You casually reveal that you consulted on costume design for another supersuit, leading to an unexpected reaction from your boyfriend
Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x Reader
Word Count: 1.9k
Warnings: 18+ | smut (minors & pearl clutchers, don't u dare even try me); kinda public sex; unprotected p in v; role play; clothed sex; language [let me know if i missed anything!]
Things to be aware of: established relationship; Reader's wearing a dress; Tom's wearing Loki's coronation armor; mango namedrop (i couldn't resist 🤣)
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This was absolute torture in the most devilishly delicious way. Sitting in front of the monitor and watching your boyfriend acting out a scene wherein Loki was about to step in to the role of Crown Prince of Asgard because Thor had "gone missing" due to one of the god's shenanigans turning his brother into a literal frog, wearing the very costume that had the internet running amok with how it made certain parts of him so prominently shaped that Marvel's considerably lower budget back then had to make room for extra editing to keep the final cut family friendly.
You never thought the day would come that you would see him in that costume just mere feet away from you. And to have him take on that majestic stance with his feet shoulder width apart and arms outstretched as he basked in the applause and praise that the people of Asgard were showering him with?
"Fucking end me," you muttered as soon as Kate yelled for them to cut the cameras.
"Okay now I get why they needed the extra CGI budget for that bulge fucking Christ on a crutch," Bryan commented, lightly nudging at your shoulder to snap you out and stop you from shamelessly staring. "Why madam, should I go get you a paper towel or something for that bit of drool at the corner of your mouth?"
"Better get one for yourself as well, Bry. Now stop ogling my boyfriend before I get tempted to check if those prop daggers have any stab in them."
He gave you a playful scandalized look before walking away, making a big show of wiping his sleeve at the corner of his mouth to get a laugh out of you.
You turned back to face the monitor, only to have your face inches away from the 'fabled mango' that had a rather large corner of the internet in absolute shambles whenever a picture would be released that had it in plain view. Your eyes traveled upwards until they met with Tom's ocean blue ones, your boyfriend greeting you with a wide smile and a wicked gleam in his eyes that he was barely trying to keep contained.
"I suggest you take a step back unless you're fully prepared to give all our colleagues a show," you warned him, starting to mirror the expression on his face.
"But this is such an enticing view, sweetheart, why would I want to give it up?" he shot back, fingertips lightly tracing along your jawline. "And I highly doubt that you're fully prepared to give our colleagues a show."
You only responded to him by slowly running your tongue across the top row of your teeth. "Are you sure about that, sweetie?" That made him take a step back, causing you to break out into a wide grin and scrunching your nose at him. "So how's the costume feel?" you asked him while you two walked toward his trailer.
"Surprised it still fits, if I'm being honest," he answered you with a slight laugh. "Actually it might…fit a little better than it did a decade ago."
"Ooh, good you're still here." You both gave Kate a small wave as she jogged up to you. "I was about to tell you to make your way to Costuming to see if you needed any adjustments. Looks like you read my mind." She gave a quick look at your now joint hands, Tom hooking his finger around one of yours. "Y/N, I'm sure you can handle any adjustments he'll need so you two can go and work on that while we're setting up for the shot with the prop frog. And in case you two wanna say hi, Chris will be here today to record his lines as Frog Thor."
As if on cue, you heard a booming voice from several yards away. "Hi, Brother! Hi, tiny terror! Am I gonna be an uncle yet??"
"Not yet, Chris!" you both hollered back at him, making the Australian wave his hand in a jokingly dismissive manner at you before stepping in to the ADR area.
"There is something new about this costume now that I quite like," Tom spoke up again when you were just outside his trailer. "When I first had it, the inner layer under the metalwork used to be just one piece, like a bodysuit. Made it a whole affair just to go to the bathroom. Now it's a shirt and trousers setup and has a suspender mechanism worked into the metal to secure the bottom half in place. Made my day much easier."
"Well you're very welcome, sweetie," you responded absentmindedly, closing the trailer door.
"This was your work, goddess?"
"Uhm...yeah. I did some remote consultation last year for another superhero costume. The actor's main concern was how he'd pee while wearing the thing, so I drew up some sketches, made his suit a bit modular. But it was gonna be a conflict of interest if they got me for costume design considering my involvement with Marvel, so we minimized my work to justify not including my name in the credits."
You let out a tiny yelp feeling him walk behind you, arms wrapping around your waist as his nose traced a line from your collarbone to your ear. "Hmm…conflict of interest? So DC, then?" he rasped, nipping at your earlobe.
"Uh huh," you answered him breathlessly, leaning in to his embrace. "What I learned making the sketches for the Batsuit, I adapted into the adjustments for your costumes."
Something in the air shifted once the words left your mouth. His hold on you shifted into what almost felt…possessive. "Precious little mortal." The growl in his voice had you growing weaker in his arms. "Consulting behind enemy lines. For the man that I knew for a fact once held your attention so…fervently."
"Why sweetie, are you--Are you jealous? It was a college crush, and a light one at that." You turned in his arms to pull him into a quick kiss that quickly became heated, his hands moving to the backs of your thighs to lift you off your feet and press you against the wall of his trailer's tight entryway.
"It should matter not, so long as you remember that you are mine," he murmured against your lips, securing your body against the wall before moving to undo the suspenders under the metal armor by his hips. "Do you know what I particularly enjoy about your modifications, sweet Y/N?"
You shook your head at him, feeling your arousal pooling between your legs as he smirked at you, hearing the snap of the suspenders from underneath the armor coming off.
"Ease of access," he said simply, shuffling his pants down his thighs and freeing his quickly hardening length. His smirk widened into a devilish grin when he slipped his hand between your legs to find nearly drenched panties. "So gloriously eager…" he teased, moving the fabric to the side.
A high-pitched moan slipped from your lips when he eased his way into you, inch by torturous inch, in shallow thrusts. "Tom, sweetie I--"
"Thomas isn't here right now, pet."
Oh God. Oh fuck. "Loki?!"
"Such a clever little mortal," he grunted, starting to move in shallow thrusts, the tip of his cock easily brushing against a spot deep inside you that had you seeing stars especially from this angle. "Tell me you're mine." He let out a staggered breath, groaning into the crook of your neck as your warmth surrounded him. "T-Tell me who this gloriously tight p-perfect little quim belongs to."
"Y-You--oh f-fuck!" you told him shakily. "I belong to you. I'm yours, I'm all yours."
Obscene moans bounced off the walls of his trailer as he bit and sucked at your neck, working his hand between your bodies to rub tight circles on your clit. "Louder, darling. Say my name. Scream it. Let everyone who dares listen know that only I may claim you like this."
Your body started to shake with how hard your climax hit you, your walls fluttering and clenching around him while you let out a guttural scream of "LOKI!" that might've scratched your throat halfway raw. Before you could say it again, he slanted his mouth over yours, muffling both your screams in a heated kiss that felt rife with desperation as you felt his release starting to fill you, his hips jerking in a staggered rhythm.
It barely crossed your mind that this might get you into a heaping pile of trouble. That you might have just put your job at stake for a quickie with your boyfriend. He broke the kiss with a slight gasp, kissing a path from your cheek down to your neck while you both took deep breaths coming down from your high.
When you heard his breaths grow softer you wrapped your arms around his shoulder and upper back, lightly stroking his hair before you tried to talk, the intensity of the last few minutes still having you struggling to form any coherent words. "Tom?"
You felt a slight wave of relief when he answered you softly. "Yes, goddess?"
"Look at me, sweetie." You pressed a soft kiss to his temple before he pulled away from your neck, nearly blacked out eyes meeting your own. "I love you. Only you." Your hands went to frame his face, thumbs tracing along the lines of his cheekbones. "I don't think I'll ever…No one else could ever--"
Before you could say anything else, he leaned in to cut you off with a kiss, the rest of the words you struggled to say dying off with a whimper at the back of your throat. You still couldn't find it in you to say them anyway. You're it for me. You're the last man I'm gonna love. There won't be an 'after you'.
"You know that, right?" you murmured against his lips, settling for those words instead.
"I do." He quickly stole another kiss from you before continuing, "Some days it just gets to me. The thought that someday someone might--"
"That will never happen." You crossed your hands behind his neck, pulling him close enough that he could rest his forehead on yours. "Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but you're kinda stuck with me, sweetie."
"I may want to get that in writing one of these days," he shot back, his hands lightly grasping your sides before he pressed your bodies even closer together, if such a feat were even possible. "And if anything, you're stuck with me. There's no version of my future that I could ever see that doesn't have you with me."
He started to move inside you again, leaving you no choice but to process his words later, his hips moving in long, slow thrusts that had you feeling every devastating inch of him. "Again?" you whimpered breathlessly.
"You should know me well enough by now, goddess," he whispered, a devilish smile gracing his features and searing an image so erotically charged into your memory. "Once is never enough."
That was the day you agreed that quickies would never be an option again moving forward.
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A/N: Another Kinktober 2023 story in the bag! Wait hold on…if I knocked out two prompts in this (kinda sorta), does this mean I only have 2 more to go before I get my initial goal or are y'all gonna absolutely snipe me ded if I pull that technicality? 🤣
I know I said 'bath/shower' with Magnus was next but I parallel-wrote that with this and this one got the banging out first while the other still has me blocked because smut is just…it's not my strong suit okay--it takes me 5-7 business days to get it done 🥴 Currently parallel writing that and the Conrad piece for 'slow & soft' and the President Loki piece for 'fingering' all at the same time so only time will tell which one of them will go up next 🫡
everything taglist: @simplyholl @loopsisloops @imalovernotahater @coldnique @loz-3 @huntress-artemiss @salempoe @vickie5446 @athalialaufeyson @lokiprompts @kats72 @kikster606 @evelyn-kingsley @lokixryss @thomase1 @mischief2sarawr @peaches1958 @lovingchoices14 @lunarnights95 @goblingirlsarah @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @creationsbyme @maple-seed @mjsthrillernp @ladyofthestayingpower @mygfloki @sititran @glitterylokislut @ozymdias @fictive-sl0th  @lokidbadguy @mochie85 @silverfire475 @joyful-enchantress @elizabethmidnight2017 @holdmytesseract @smolvenger @gigglingtiggerv2 @lokidokieokie @superficialdomina @anukulee @kmc1989 @november-rayne @goddessofwonderland @buttercupcookies-blog
kinktober 2023 taglist: @azula-karai-27
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thegayestmferintown · 13 days
Note
Can i request for any twisted wonderland characters that's fit x reader who don't know how to cook
yeah, of course!
Some of these characters have shorter parts because I added every character in the game, minus side characters such as (Artemiy Artemiyevich Pinker (Che'nya), Rollo Flamme, et cetera)
Also! If there are any inadequacies with grammar, I apologize, I'm at a friend's house while i'm writing this and I'm very easily distracted.
If it's not obvious, I'm a sucker for soft Sebek
Ortho is strictly platonic!
And Reader can be viewed as either Yuu or not!
@nisobird because there's Azul
Warnings ;; None
Relationship ;; Romantic
Type ;; Headcanons
Heartslabyul
Riddle Rosehearts ;; Heartslabyul Housewarden ;; Second Year
Riddle's world comes crashing down, in all honesty.
The boy was raised with the ideal that a partner is supposed to be at least a decent cook, but you are the exact opposite.
He will eat your food only to be nice.
Even though he can't cook all that well himself, he'll try to suggest ways to make it better even though none of his suggestions really, truly help the awfulness of your cooking.
Let's just hope you don't end up cooking for his mother.
Trey Clover ;; Heartslabyul Vice-Housewarden ;; Third Year
Trey is quite literally the sunshine to your moonlight, your sky to your ground.
You two are total, clear opposites.
He can cook almost anything without flaw, especially pastries and sweets.
He will panic if he ever sees you in the kitchen, trying to cook something.
He'll subtly take over for you, slowly taking more and more control of the kitchen.
Cater Diamond ;; Heartslabyul ;; Third Year
Cater would not care one single bit.
He is taking so, so many photos and posting them on Magicam, he does not give two shits whether it looks amazing, or absolutely terrible.
He will post it, specifically because you're his partner, you're his significant other.
And yes, he will shove it down his throat even if he needs to vomit it up later.
Ace Trappola ;; Heartslabyul ;; First Year
Ace can't cook, not one bit.
He's also very weird about his tastes.
He'll eat pickles and ice cream but he probably won't eat a single slice of cheese.
He'll eat anything you make at all whatsoever, unless there's cheese. (I headcanon he absolutely hates cheese, don't ask why)
He'll watch you cook and won't even interfere.
He does notice how bad your cooking is but he won't say or do anything about it because he genuinely does not care.
He'll even tell you it's actually good
Deuce Spade ;; Heartslabyul ;; First Year
Deuce doesn't even notice how bad it is, and if he did, he wouldn't even care.
He'll anything and everything, minus bell peppers.
He cannot, and will not, eat bell peppers.
He hates the taste, the texture, everything about bell peppers is everything he hates in all of Twisted Wonderland.
He tends to not watch you cook and has no reason for it.
Savanaclaw
Leona Kingscholar ;; Savanaclaw Housewarden ;; Third Year
Leona's not exactly shameless when it comes to meats, despite any sort of meat being among his absolute favorite foods.
He's not very picky about meats though. Just as long as it's cooked decently, and seasoned alright, he's fine.
Despite being a literal prince, he does not have a prince's palette.
He'll literally eat raw meat if it suits his needs
Of course, that's mostly because of the lion beastman part of him
Ruggie Bucchi ;; Savanaclaw ;; Second Year
Ruggie is literally shameless, make him anything and he'll eat it.
Just as long as it's not rotten, he'll eat quite literally anything.
He's not the greatest cook, but he'll help in any way he possibly can.
He'll most definitely bring your food to the kids in his neighborhood, no matter how terrible it is.
He wants to make sure they're fed, and he's happy when you're willing to cook.
He never tells you if he genuinely thinks you're food is bad, he'll end up feeling terrible and he knows that so he won't say a thing about your cooking.
Unless it's any sort of praise.
Jack Howl ;; Savanaclaw ;; First Year
Jack isn't entirely picky, but he's not the biggest fan of your cooking.
Being who he is, he'll feel bad for even thinking that your food is bad.
Also being the honest man he is, he'll sadly point it out to you, admitting his wrongdoing.
He's a big sweetheart, so he'll try to be as kind to you as he can, no matter how you end up reacting.
Octavinelle
Azul Ashengrotto ;; Octavinelle Housewarden ;; Second Year
Given that Azul grew up with his mother owning a restaurant, and he himself owning a restaurant, he's a bit... iffy over your cooking skills.
Of course, he'll always be nice when he brings it up. You're his significant other after all.
He'll point it out and he may give you some of his mom's recipes to help you follow along.
He helps you cook much more than he used to, letting you have most of the control, but he will come in if he sees you do something wrong.
Jade Leech ;; Octavinelle Vice-Housewarden ;; Second Year
Jade finds you and your cooking very, very entertaining.
He doesn't ever actually help you unless he finds you cooking mushrooms and.... screwing them up.
After that, he's immediately on your case and helping you cook.
Within the next two or three weeks, you're an absolute master chef.
Especially with mushrooms. By time Jade is done with you, you're more than likely a better chef when it comes to mushrooms than he is.
Floyd Leech ;; Octavinelle ;; Second Year
Floyd thinks you are the most entertaining human he's ever met.
Like some other people, he doesn't think your food is bad, just that it's so unbelievably entertaining and unique.
He actually doesn't try to help your cooking or change it or buy you anything new.
He simply watches the chaos of your cooking unfold, while occasionally adding his own, odd concoction to the mix.
And he will eat your food, no matter what you put on his plate, or what you put in the odd concoction you call your cooking.
Just don't add any shiitake mushrooms, he begs of you.
Scarabia
Kalim Al-Asim ;; Scarabia Housewarden ;; Second Year
Kalim more than likely trusts you enough to not have Jamil test the food you give him.
The only way Jamil would let Kalim eat your food is if Jamil himself trusted you.
So, if Jamil trusted you, Kalim would more than happily eat your food himself.
He probably wouldn't care if your food was the best food in the whole of Twisted Wonderland, or if your food is the worst thing in all of Twisted Wonderland.
He'll eat it happily and won't complain one bit.
Jamil Viper ;; Scarabia Vice-Housewarden ;; Second Year
Jamil, if he truly trusts you, will eat small bits of your food and will help you cook every single time you step in a kitchen.
He won't completely take over like Trey would, but he will guide you in every single way, subtle or not.
Once you get better and better, he'll eat your food more and more.
He'll take over for you at any time and finish the cooking for you, if that's what you'd like, all you'd have to do is say the word.
Pomefiore
Vil Schoenheit ;; Pomefiore Housewarden ;; Third Year
You're going to make the Vil Schoenheit break out. And that's a feat, especially considering his rigorous skincare routine.
He won't eat any of your food, and he will flat-out tell you, in a relatively nice tone of voice, that your food is not exactly good.
If he realizes that it hurts you, he'll try to find ways for your cooking to taste relatively better, whether it be buying you new utensils, or buying you cookbooks or any other things like that.
He promises you that he never meant to hurt you, he just wants to... help.
Rook Hunt ;; Pomefiore Vice-Housewarden ;; Third Year
Oh, Rook does not care. He genuinely thinks that your cooking is beautiful and wonderful in every single way possible.
He will eat your food and compliment you even if you put whole-ass children's toys in your food.
He'll buy you whatever you need for your cooking without you even need to ask him, he's kind of a freak like that.
Epel Felmier ;; Pomefiore ;; First Year
Epel is very in the middle, he's fine with your bad cooking just.... don't make him eat it because he will act like a toddler having to eat vegetables.
Or, that's what he says he won't do.
He says he'll be all manly and eat it like a man, but you know for a fact that he won't and he will act like a little kid.
Ignihyde
Idia Shroud ;; Ignihyde Housewarden ;; Third Year
Idia barely eats as it is, so when you bring him food, his hair will immediately turn pink and he'll try to hide his face by tightening his hood over his head.
He won't care whether it's bad or good, he'll only care about the fact that you actually... brought him food.
Of course, Ortho does so all the time, but it's different when your significant other brings you a whole meal because they don't want you to starve.
Once again, he doesn't care whether it's good or bad, he'll shove it down his throat either way.
Ortho Shroud ;; Ignihyde ;; First Year
Ortho can't exactly eat, given that he's both a robot and a machine.
But he'll look up recipes and help you cook and help you get as best and as good as you can get.
He'll always help, and use every single upgrade he's ever got put into him by his big brother to help you cook as best as you can.
Diasomnia
Malleus Draconia ;; Diasomnia Housewarden ;; Third Year
Oh, boy. Malleus is scared that he has another Lilia on his hands. Of course, your food is not as bad as Lilia's, but it's still not, for lack of a better word, good.
He will eat it, but he'll compliment and praise your cooking in a very... odd way.
He'll compliment you, yes. But he'll also add in some, not-so-subtle ways you can improve.
Don't tell him, he genuinely thinks his attempts at helping are extremely subtle, when they are absolutely not.
Lilia Vanrouge ;; Diasomnia Vice-Housewarden ;; Third Year
Lilia, like Rook, Kalim, and Deuce, won't even notice that your food is bad.
And that is mostly because he, himself is a bad chef.
He's such a bad chef he can't even tell when foods are actually bad.
Even if he could tell that your food was not good, he still wouldn't care because he just loves you far, far too much to even think of pointing it out.
Silver Vanrouge ;; Diasomnia ;; Second Year
Silver is internally sobbing. First, his Father, and now, his significant other.
He's very sweet about telling you ways you can improve.
He actually does this with his father, too. But you're the only one who picks up on it, Lilia, sadly, does not.
Silver tries his absolute hardest to help, but he eventually succumbs to his sleep, but he always profusely apologizes afterward.
Sebek Zigvolt ;; Diasomnia ;; First Year
Sebek is oddly much sweeter about it than you'd ever expect.
He doesn't yell, but he does let you know that it doesn't taste good.
He explains ways you can fix it, despite he himself not knowing how to cook all that well.
He explains everything he knows about cooking to try and help you.
If Sebek manages to view a human as a significant other, or partner, he will dote on your every need or want in the sweetest way that you'd never, ever expect from him.
He's very sweet as he helps you cook, making sure that you do everything to the best of your genuine ability.
171 notes · View notes
yokohamapound · 10 months
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BSD Boys With a Nervous Flier S/O
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For Amulet! <3
(I added Chuuya for me. :P)
Characters: Dazai Osamu, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Edogawa Ranpo, Nakahara Chuuya
Contents: NSFW jokes/references, fear of flying.
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Dazai Osamu
Don’t bother trying to hide it. Dazai can pick up on every tiny little tell, so unless you’ve got the world’s best poker face, he’ll figure it out before you say a single word. It’s all there, the shrunken pupils when he shows you the tickets, wiping your sweaty palms on your pants when you’re booking the taxi to the airport, the harsh, unsteady breathing when you’re queueing to check in. 
For once, wisely, he drops the double suicide jokes. The last thing you need to think about right now is you or him dying, and he’s that much of an ass. Most of the time.
He wraps an arm around your shoulders, leaning in and whispering in your ear so it doesn’t carry to the other passengers in the boarding queue. “Guess what?”
You frown, distracted momentarily, and look at him. “What?”
His eyes glitter with mischief, and his smile widens into a full blown smirk. “You know how your ears sometimes pop when the cabin pressure changes? They say you should have chew gum or suck on candy.”
Your eyes narrow, suspicious. Dazai leans down to look into your eyes, grinning. 
“I don’t have any candy, but I’ve got something you can su—oww!”
He deserved to have his foot trodden on, really. Dazai might pout, but internally he’s smug that his plan to distract you worked. He’s got plenty more like that up his sleeve. 
Fyodor Dostoevsky
Flying with Fyodor is something different entirely. With the weight (and wallet) of the Decay of Angels behind him, he would never fly on a commercial airline. Normally he doesn’t care much - he’ll take a helicopter or some other type of solo plane. If he’s taking his precious myshka though, he’s flying in style. 
Naturally, he already knows about your fear of flying.
You can take comfort in the fact that Fyodor has literally already thought of everything. There are multiple contingency plans for any conceivable emergency onboard the jet. He has a backup helicopter. There are parachutes. There are backup parachutes. 
All you have to do is get dolled up and sit pretty on one of the luxurious recliner seats, being fed little tidbits of fruit and cake and sipping champagne. Fyodor has his laptop out, watching the endless screeds of incomprehensible information, one resting on your thigh, thumb tracing circles into your warm, soft skin. 
If you want a sedative, he’ll allow it, though his tone is subtly disapproving. He doesn’t like seeing you passed out (unless he’s been the one to drug you or exhaust you, naturally.) Still, if it makes you feel better.
He has…other methods to distract you however. Ones you’ll learn all about when he orders the cabin crew out of the main seating area and draws the curtains. You’ll be flying so high you might not even notice you’ve landed. 
Edogawa Ranpo
Ranpo has an easy solution to all your fears and anxieties—he’s such a baby that you have to look after him and you just won’t have time to worry about the plane going down, because you’ll be trying to convince him he can’t cram a whole gumball machine in his suitcase.
“It’ll fit!”
“You know it won’t! It’s physically impossible. You’re supposed to be a genius!”
“Well, I'm on vacation!”
He’s exuberant and excited to wander through Duty Free and buy all the varieties of chocolate and snacks they sell. Ranpo isn’t getting on that plane without snacks. Have you eaten plane food? That’s simply not going to cut it for the World’s Greatest Detective. 
It’s almost…calculated, the way he seems to rush off to a new thing every time your jitters start coming back. Your heart starts to race, your mouth goes dry, and then you notice Ranpo is gone from your side again. 
By the time you get onto the actual plane, you’re lowkey exhausted, and he still looks as smug as ever, his bag of chips rustling as he snacks in his seat. He opens his eyes, looks around the plane with that sharp, green gaze, then shrugs and settles against the backrest. 
“Nothing wrong with the plane, we’ll be fine,” he declares, tossing a chip into his mouth. “Do you think they have Ramune?”
Nakahara Chuuya
Chuuya is a well-travelled guy due to his position as a Port Mafia executive and enforcer. It seems as if he gets sent abroad now and then to look after the mafia’s foreign interests and contracts. Koyo seems to stay back more, acting as Mori’s advisor, so it’s Chuuya who racks up the airmiles. He generally travels first or business class, because he’s not about to be back in the cattle runs—sorry, economy. 
He’s so used to it by now that booking the flights, packing, and getting to the airport are a breeze. It’s so mundane to him that he’s a little surprised to find out how frightened you are. He has to admit, it’s kinda cute. 
He lounges next to you in your first class seats, a glass of wine in one hand and your hip in the other, cuddling you against his side. 
“Dollface, what’re you shakin’ for?” he teases, poking you in the ribs. “You forgettin’ who you’re flyin’ with?”
Oh. That’s right. Mr. Gravity Master himself. 
“So if something happens, you could stop the plane falling?” you ask, almost in disbelief. 
He scoffs. “What do you take me for? You’re gonna be on the safest flight in existence. They should be paying me to fly.”
748 notes · View notes
jeansplaytoy · 10 months
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aot sleeping head cannons just because.
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lowercase, includes: eren, connie, jean, levi, and armin, (this is actually kind of long)
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eren
he sleeps heavy asf, like heavy heavy 💀 there could be a shootout and he dgaf what’s going on like he literally doesn’t wake up at all even if you yell his name he’ll be dead asleep and you’re just like “what if i was getting killed or kidnapped, dude?”
doesn’t sleep with a fan on. you don’t know what the problem is, he don’t know what the problem is, but he cannot sleep with a fan on. he claims it makes too much noise and somehow sleeps perfectly fine, but you’re the one sweating bricks and stones, + he’s all up on you and he’ll be a perfect temperature, but you’ll feel like you out on a hot summer day.
hates shirts. this man despises shirts. like he’ll full on throw a fit if there’s another girl or something staying at y’all house so he tells his self he has to put a shirt on (even when the girl has a boyfriend) and you don’t even tell him to. he complains like sleeping with a shirt or even a tank top is too much work so you can always feel his bear chest on your face or your stomach when you sleep in a crop top or something.
let’s be completely honest, he def twitches hard asf in his sleep 😭. like you’ll be watching a movie that he fell asleep watching with you, and you’ll be on his chest, boom. he jumps hard af for no reason.
falls asleep everywhere, every time. he promises to stay up with you when you’re with him and then next thing yk, his eyes glued closed.
connie
alwaysss sleeps in sweat pants. you don’t know why, but the sweat pants + no shirt combo is his favorite. he sleeps under the sheets in sweat pants and it makes you so uncomfortable when y’all cuddle 💀
you have to go to sleep with him at all times. at random times he’s just like “bae, let’s go to sleep.” even when you’re not sleepy. “i don’t care man, come on.” like it’s literally a priority because if you’re not with him when he’s planning to go to sleep, then he’s gonna have a hard time falling asleep
he’s a slobber frfr. like you’ll wake up at random times and honestly be disgusted because his slob will be on your arm or back or something and he honestly laughs it off like doesn’t even apologize he’s just like “oh shit i drooled on you.” and laugh 😭.
sleeps with one of his legs propped up. like when he’s laying down on his phone or something, both of his legs are rested up and he’s man spreading or something, but when he’s sleeping on his back, one of them are def up and you like it because for some reason it’s more comfortable.
this boy hates when people wake him up out of his sleep. he’ll give you a mean ass mean mug and stare at you before getting up (not you because he’d be dead if he did ts) but if anybody wakes him up, even if he asks, he’ll be pissed off. like when his alarm goes off, “‘the fuck up.” and grip his phone tight asf to turn it off. 😭😭
levi
surprisingly a light sleeper, he gets woken up by the smallest noises and randomly pops his head up if he hears your footsteps to the bathroom or something. he’ll be like “what’re you doing?” in the most non-sleepy voice and you’ll like be like “i have to pee.” and he’ll say okay and lay back down 💀
jumps up from his sleep. like sometimes he could be having the most peaceful dream and if you even tap him, his eyes will literally shoot open and he’d look at you like you just called him something he never heard of.
he def likes it cold asf in his room when he’s sleeping. he cannot sleep in a hot room at all. he needs the air, ceiling fan, and fan on. he hates sweating and/or feeling sticky when he’s asleep. literally gets disgusted at the thought or feeling of it.
he honestly doesn’t even think about cuddling with you unless you suggest it or you want it, or if you’re feeling sad. but if every things fine, he’ll go to sleep unbothered if he doesn’t feel you on him. but if he doesn’t feel your leg touching his or if he doesn’t hear you breathing or feel your presence, that’s when he gets confused like “where did she just go?” sometimes he’ll purposely move him leg over just to make sure you’re still beside him.
now if y’all are cuddling, just know, some part of his body will randomly be over another part of yours. like if y’all are spooning, you’ll wake up and feel his arm over your head and be like wth? 😭 and his leg over yours sometimes, but the thing is, he doesn’t even mean to do it. it just happens.
jean
he bear cuddles you 💀. like he will wrap his arms around your waist so tight but be dead asleep, and he doesn’t even try to sometimes, but he literally forgets his own strength and it just happens.
he only wakes up to someone calling his name, never to being shook. like you will shake the hell out of this man and he won’t move, but the minute you say his name, “huh?” he’ll look at you. like one time you accidentally tripped over something while walking to you guys’ bed in the dark, and fell on his legs. he did not budge.
ties his hair up in a tiny ponytail in the front so that when he lays on you, he won’t get sweat on your body. 🙏🏾 and he always makes sure his earrings aren’t in when he’s sleeping so that they won’t poke your arm or chest when he’s laying on top of you.
he hates sleeping in silence. he has to have the TV on or hear something because if he doesn’t he’s gonna get uncomfortable. like he’ll ask you, “baby, can you snore real quick?” when you’re asleep and you’ll just be like man what?
this mf is like a couch dad 💀 everytime he falls asleep when he’s not supposed to and you call him out on it he’ll try his best to defend his self claiming he wasn’t asleep when he was literally just dead and it doesn’t make sense to you.
armin
when he’s sleepy, he’s gonna go to sleep, no doubt about it. he doesn’t care where he’s at, if he’s at church, his mom def used to pinch him by the ear when he fell asleep💀. this boy used to fall asleep at the dinner table after school, he seriously does not care at all.
he snores soft asf like you’ll hear him snore and it’ll never stop but it never bothers you somehow. like sometimes when he tries to fake sleep and prank you, you’ll be like wtf are you doing because he’s not snoring.
he hates when you go to sleep before him. like he won’t bother to wake you up because you’ll give him a mean ass look but he’s gonna be like “did she really just fall asleep on me?” especially when you don’t tell him goodnight and give him his nightly kiss, he’ll stare at you for a minute and shake his head (but of course he still loves you!)
he sweats cold sweat. 😭. don’t even ask how or why i would assume (or know) this but you cannot tell me he doesn’t sweat cold sweat. like sometimes he’s not even hot and he’ll think you poured water on his forehead or something and you’ll just be like “baby, you sweat in your sleep.” but he literally forgets and you have to tell him over and over again.
he wakes up so calmlyyyy like you’ll wake him up from having a good ass dream or a deep ass sleep and he’ll just be like “hm?” kind of like levi but more sleepy. like he’ll open his eyes fully, forgetting that it’s gonna burn after a few seconds. he literally doesn’t care about being woken up, honestly.
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igotanidea · 10 months
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Bonding: Damian Wayne x sister!reader
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Request: from the prompt list : 4: "Didn't know you liked being pinned to the ground this much
Warning: nothing, it;s just fun and fluff, most likely set in the WFA universe.
***
„What happened to you two?” Dick could barely hold back the terror in his voice upon watching his younger siblings. Jason however was not so considerate and  straight forward started laughing at Y/N and Damian, the former with the nose swollen and red like a Rudolf and the latter with childish patches all over his forearms.
“Have you two escaped the circus? Sure as hell with such look you would fit there!” he let out a laugh so loud it captured the attention of no one else than Bruce, who became alerted in an instant. It wasn’t usual for Jason to be this happy and chuckling and it was …. suspicious. 
Similar to Dick’s, his face dropped upon seeing his kids in such damaged state and just sighed deeply.
“What did you do?” he rubbed his forehead, looking up to the sky probably wondering what mistake did he make (well, the question should have been – what mistake didn’t he make?). Never before had he looked so fatherly, like when Y/N and Damian started their mischief.
Y/N was the middle child, younger than Dick and Jason, but older than Tim and Damian, but Bruce could swear that sometimes she acted like a literal five year old. Especially when any of her brothers started messing up with her things. Especially when Damian did. No one could ever tell what atrocities she could resort to when he grabbed something that wasn’t his.
“It was all his fault!” Y/N cried out, her voice muffled by the swollen nose and she sounded more like a wounded animal rather than a human being.
“I am beyond your level, Y/N and cannot be blamed for…..”
“SIT!” Bruce growled in desperation, but neither of his kids listened. If anything they started bantering even more.
“Not many parental successes on your account, right Bruce?” Jason mocked, but the oldest Wayne didn’t bother answering. Instead he grabbed Damian by the collar and yanked him back and in the air so his feet started dangling above the ground. Luckily Y/N was too tall to do that to her as well.
“This is derogatory” Damian crossed his arms and pouted, the funniest look of her brother making Y/N laugh loudly “put me down, father so I can kick her ass again and….”
“Again?” Bruce eyes focused on his youngest son “what do you mean, again?”
“Nothing!” Y/N chimed in, desperate to keep some kind of secret
“Oh, are you ashamed to admit you got beaten by me in the combat, dear sister?”
“Shut up you little rascal!” Y/N threw herself at him, but this time it was Dick who grabbed her and hold her back
“What did he do?” Grayson asked, knowing well enough how much of a menace Damian could be
“NOTHING!” the boy struggled against his father’s grip
“Who’s afraid to admit what now?!” Y/N smirked at him.
“Ok, that’s it” clearly it was Jason who lost patience first “talk or I’ll draw blood.”
“You wouldn’t dare.” His sister threw him a daring gaze
“Wanna try me, sis? You already got a swollen nose and I can bet that this guy you like…..”
“SHUT UP JASON!”
“wait, there’s a guy?” Bruce was confused “who is he? Why didn’t I met him? How much does he know about us?”
“Not the time, Bruce!”
“LET ME GO DICK!!”
“Sorry, sunshine can’t really do that. Unless you tell us what happened.”
“fine!” she hissed “fine! I’ll tell you!”
An hour ago
“DAMIAN WAYNE!”  her voice echoed through the whole Wayne Manor and made the glassed windows shake. Honestly, how could no one in the family of vigilante hear that was beyond her. “you little piece of shit, where the hell are you!?”
“Have you called me sister?” Damian emerged from his room, looking nothing but innocent with the play-pretend smile. But Y/N knew better. She was fairly aware that he was skillful in using that Wayne gene trying to charm people. Too bad his eyes were glistening with mischief.
“You can’t play me, you demon.”
“Did something happened?” he titled his head in curiosity, observing his sister getting more and more angry. Oh, how entertaining it was to see her face get red, her fist clench. Fascinating how girl’s hormones worked.
But clearly, he underestimated Y/N. Yes, she was an emotional young woman surrounded by no less than four brothers, but she was also an adopted Wayne. And the realization of that fact made her calm down. Damian wanted her to get mad. Which meant he had some sort of plan.
“My little, sweet, wonderful, lovely brother.” She quickly changed the method of acting
“Huh?” Damian frowned, still not used to people acting nice towards him. This was…. unexpected. Y/N was clearly cunning and he had to be prepared.
“Tell me, did you happen to see my phone somewhere around?”
“No.” the answer was clearly too fast to be convincing.
“Really?” she smiled and looked over his shoulder inside his room. The perks of being taller and seeing more. “Then what is lying there on your desk?”
“That’s mine.”
“Damian…..” her voice became serious, her posture tensing “give it back to me. Now.”
“No.” he crossed arms, mimicking her position. Oh, they were both preparing for a fight, neither even beginning to consider the option of relenting. “does father know about your little crush?”
“YOU WERE READING MY TEXTS?!!?”
“Do you even realize in how much danger you put us because of your silly little….”
“AH!!” he did not get to finish the sentence when she went at him taking him by surprise. However, not enough of a surprise that he didn’t manage to step back. Instead of pining him to the ground she tripped and dashed into his room, immediately reaching towards the bed to grab her mobile, but Damian grabbed her arm and yanked her back.
“You little rascal!” she yelled, when they started a real Batman-style fight. “It’s mine!”
“it’s a violation of the rules!” he spat back “we’re not supposed to be in a relationship with civilians!”
“what would you know about relationships?!” Y/N blocked his punch, turning around and tripping him up. “you were raised by freaking assassins!”
“How bad we don’t get to choose family, right?” he hissed, falling on his back on the ground but immediately getting up and attacking her again.
Y/N was good, skilled and intuitive, but Damian was smaller and maybe a bit faster and that’s why she did not see it coming when he glanced off the mattress and landed on her back, trying to tackle her to the ground
“GET OFF ME!” she yelled trying to untangle his arms from her neck
“Not a chance!”
They were struggling so hard that at one point this fight moved towards the corridor and with just one wrong step they started falling down the stairs, still doing their best to damage one another. Damian was pulling at Y/N hair, while she covered his eyes in an attempt to blind him. It took a few minutes of weltering, grunting and dapping before they ended up at the base of the stairs.
“Auch…..” they both moaned in unison, their bones and bones already bruised and damaged. It really did hurt.
“HAHA! I won!” Damian yelled as he realized that the position in which they landed allowed him to sit on top of her sister, his weight holding her down.
“Get off me you idiot…..” she whined trying to push him away, but not succeeding at all.
“Didn't know you liked being pinned to the ground this much, Y/N” Damian laughed at her poor, week attempt to get rid of him.
“AH!” she cried out again and started waving her hands at him, Damian instantly started the same and now they were laying on the floor, with him still on top of her, acting like toddlers and emitting battle cries.
“MASTER DAMIAN! MISS Y/N!”
Shit.
Alfred.
The butler just sighed deeply, too used to many very strange views and behaviors around the manor. Too many to care and ask questions.
“Please get up from the floor. Miss Y/N, your nose is bleeding and as for you, Master Damian you got bloody scratches all over your arms.”
“Sorry Alfred.” They followed every word Alfred said to them and stood beside him with their heads hanging low.
“Let’s patch you two up.” Alfred motioned them towards the living room, gathering medical supplied on the way.
Now.
“And he gave you a animal shaped patch!” Jason laughed so hard he had to grab his belly, almost rolling of the couch
“Didn’t you hear a word, Jace? He took her phone! She had every right to be angry and act irrational…” Dick took his sister’s site
“Hm.” Bruce grunted
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but good job on being stealthy” Jason chucked towards Damian “normally it would be Tim to try and do such thing.”
“Are you taking his side now?” Y/N’s eyes went wide “I can’t believe….. ah!” sudden outburst made her nose bleed even more and she held the nearby cloth tighter to the bruised part of her face. “mhmmmhmhm” she mumbled grumpily
“Hm” Bruce grunted again
“Aren’t you gonna say something?” Dick turned towards his father in a bit of shock. Normally Bruce would be the one to punish them  both for disobeying the rules of the Manor but now he was just sitting on the couch, his mind wondering elsewhere.
“no.”
“What?!” four pair of surprised eyes landed on him in pure disbelief of how he acted.
“Wouldn’t make any difference. Another day another fight. Just…. apologize to each other. I’m going to the batcave. Dick, Jason come with me.”
“The hell I’m going to ….” Jason started but the look in Bruce eyes made him relent. And that was how Y/N and Damian ended up alone in the living room, sitting next to each other, eyes on the floor.
“Does it hurt much?” he asked
“Not much more than yesterday. I’ll be fine. “ she shrugged like nothing happened  “Do you think they know?”
“About what? Our secret plan to make them all crazy and take over the manor?”
“Pretty much, yes.”
“Not sure. Might need some more observation on the matter.”
“So….. we do it again tomorrow?” she smirked
“Oh, absolutely” he smiled back at her, eyes sparkling. It was always fun to fight with her.
“Then can I have my phone back?”
“Sure, I’ve seen all there was to see. “
“I hate you, Damian.” Y/N grinned looking at him
“I hate you too, sis.” He replied with a smirk
And just like that, they bumped their fists. All was good between them.
****
Meanwhile, Tim was hidden in the batcave, glued to the computer, not realizing anything of the events happening upstairs. He only raised his head once he heard Bruce, Dick and Jason entering.
“Did they do it again?” he asked seeing Bruce’s harrowed face, being enough of an answer “Ha! Life never gets boring with those two troublemakers around!”
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eydi-andrius · 10 months
Text
Can you keep it up? [Miguel O'Hara x Reader]
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cw/tw: flirty reader, bashful and irate Miguel, reader doesn't know boundaries, other spiderman/woman used to it and she's 100% supported by them, Lyla being her supportive AI ;)))), Unedited. Written on mobile. I just wanted to write this out of my system.
summary: Just you flirting your way to Miguel's pants' attention.
a/n: very self-serve fic. i understand if some lines would be cringey but that wasn't the point. the point is for Miguel to notice you or idk be tired of your antics. getting his attention is a win-win whether it was positive or negative. 😆
🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️
Does he know he's so hot when he walks that way?
You pouted as you watched Miguel walk towards Miles. Sitting leisurely on your makeshift web hammock, you watched how his firm muscle moves on his tracksuit and how it fits him perfectly. The tight leather wrapped his tempting body so beautifully and deliciously. His hips so small for a burly man, which you liked.
And please, don't get started with those sinful huge chests of his. It's so full, that you know if he cuddles you, he will swallow you whole. Not that you mind though.
For you, he is the perfect definition of tall, dark and handsome.
The only thing that was a turn off about him was his irate attitude. Yet, it's all right, you like your men with a bit of a challenge.
You know you should focus on whatever the reason why you were called by Lyla. Miguel never calls for you unless he is in a pinch. In fact, he called for everyone so it must have been an emergency. You kinda envy Lyla because she probably asked Miguel to say the word, "please" and teased him for it when he did admit he needed help. Maybe you should ask if she recorded it?
Well, the most important thing was, you're finally close to him again! It has been a while since you were allowed to be near him. When was it? Who cares really. He’s hotter now though. The temptation to climb him is back again. Well, the idea never left you in the first place.
—--
“You are staring way too much, girl." A static voice suddenly appeared near your left ear and you couldn't help the sigh of longing you have been holding out for quite some time.
"I know right? I'll do everything just to touch it. But we both know he will throw me away if I do something drastic again. Just like last time." You blinked and pouted as you watched how the fat muscle of his ass moved so hypnotizingly.
"Yeah true. I still wonder how you liked the guy though. His attitude is way less charming now compared to before." You two sighed in agreement.
"'Can you two, please stop talking about my behind when I'm literally just in front of the two of you?" He grumbled in annoyance as he showed his fangs in your direction.
"Can you say "Please" one more time, honey?" You gave him your best spidey puppy eyes. If he’s trying to intimidate you, well, it is working. Obviously, not the way he intended to.
All he replied was a disgusted, frustrated groan and marched away while dragging Pavitr. Probably to talk somewhere you can't look freely on his package.
How selfish, Mr. O’Hara.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
You wonder if Miguel will agree to princess carry you if you pay him a hundred bucks? Paying more is an option too. You’re not that stingy.
Maybe you should try asking him about it. Later? Tonight? Or probably after the mission?
Little did you know, Miguel has been calling your name while you were inside your head thinking of many ways you can make Miguel agree with your requests.
Your brows furrowed, eyes looking from afar. The spiderman with fangs can’t help but facepalm.
He can’t help but think that maybe it was wrong of him to request your assistance for this mission.
However, even though you were weird. And way into him, especially, his back and his ass. You worked way better than the other spiderman and spiderwoman. He used to hate you for being lazy and way too lax.
Yet, your method of working is 100% effective and easier than how he does his stuffs.
He has no choice but to do it.
He walked towards you until he was standing in front, less inches than he usually allows you to. He coughed to get your attention one last time, but you were way preoccupied and busy with whatever was inside your head.
He breathed in and with full strength held your shoulders and shook you. A normal person would probably die. However, doing it this way was the only effective way he knew to wake you up from your fantasies.
You screamed in terror and he was obligated to stop when you punched his hands holding your shoulder.
He was worried that he might have overdone it and he scared you. He just needed your attention and not scared you to death.
But little did he know that you screamed not because of terror but of surprise.
Miguel is in mere inches in front of you, holding your shoulders. You can practically smell his rich smell.
You are such a lucky girl.
Maybe he shook you way too hard but the only word you blurted out after a pregnant pause was……
“You are so fucking hot.” You uttered without blinking.
The collective of spider people sighed in relief. They were also worried that Miguel had made you stupid after that shake but you seem back to normal and functioning quite well.
“Gwen, you’ll go with me.” He grumbled and jumped without further ado.
Gwen was confused for a second but followed suit.
“Hey wait! Did you ask me to go with you!? HEY!” You followed closely behind them but failed when the entrance closed just after they jumped.
“Oh girlie, sometimes you gotta get out of your head when the prize is literally mere inches of you.”
Jessica shook her head and said those words with a grin. You were left flabbergasted when you realized you soiled your chance to work closely with Miguel because you daydream way too much.
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reidsdaisies · 6 months
Note
Heyyy!!!! Could you please write a blurb, drabble or headcanon about Spencer wanting to be a househusband or how would he be as such??!? I’ve been watching The way of the househusband anime lately and it sparked the idea. I love your writing and have a great day 💕💕💕
𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐡𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝!𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬!
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༉‧´ˎ˗ pairing; househusband spencer reid x gn bau!reader
༉‧´ˎ˗ a/n; you literally read my mind!! I’ve been wanting to do something about househusband spencer ever since i did spencer x housewife reader! and i had way too much fun on pinterest looking for inspo pics 😭💞 here’s a board i lowk love, I think it’s just adorable if anyone wants to know what I’m picturing — ׂׂૢ
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𝐂𝐌 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 || 𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓
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— i know i said he’s a terrible cook before, but in this universe i think he would have spent a lot of time learning how to cook and bake so he could cook you homemade meals and delicious sweet treats to show his appreciation for how hard you work to put a roof over the two of your heads
— he wears cute ass girly or flowery aprons when cooking and adorable oven mitts, fight me
— he has an unhealthy attachment to his kitchen aid mixer, will talk about how much he loves that thing. you’re concerned.
— excellent and very precise with cleaning 👌 scrubs at the bathroom sink till you can practically see your reflection in it and dusts every damn crevice of your house
— very passionate about the projects he gets into. like if he decides he wants a garden, omg he will commit. he’d probably want a house with a big backyard with enough space to build one of those cute vegetable gardens in the back yard and grow you two’s own food. and he would plant big apple and pear trees, would take pride in how great the fruit is and when everything is finally ready to be picked, he’ll make you bring it to work for the team
— AND omg a greenhouse would be his dream to have. everyone knows about his big ass brain and he definitely has extensive knowledge on all different types of plants, exactly what conditions they need to thrive
— along with that, i know he’d be really into lawn-scaping, you two have the best lawn EVER, and im not exaggerating. the back and the front of the house— absolutely beautiful. he picks out the prettiest flowers and makes sure the soil is rich, and ofc trims the bushes to perfection. he’d look so cute with gardening gloves, these or these specifically, and his massive ass, muddy ass gardening boots that are a size too big but he’s oddly attached to them.
— other hobbies he’s picked up include scrapbooking, drawing, painting, and of course knitting & crocheting.
— in one episode, he told Penelope he spent weeks knitting a scarf for his cosplay, and so now I’ve been constantly thinking about the other things he’d knit & crochet for him and his partner. scarfs, mittens, winter hats, sweaters, pot holders, anything he can make, he will make even just to try it out once.
— the pot holders would have cute animals on them or flowers. floral everything. he loves all plants, specifically flowers.
— now that you two own a house together, there’s so much opportunity for him. he’s got his own office AND most importantly, it’s massive and doubles as his own personal library. it’s walls are lined with multiple of the tallest, most spacious bookcases you could find for him, still just barely being able to fit his ever growing book collection on their shelves.
— he’s a house husband, he probably doesn’t have time for the FBI. im not sure if he would be fully a stay at home husband because that would bore him and many people need the help of his big brain so I think he’d spend a lot of time in his office, researching and writing articles probably most having to do with finding a cure for schizophrenia.
— if he were to also be a professor while married to you, i don’t think that would happen unless you’re imaging later seasons reid, but personally I’m imagining seasons 6-11 (minus season 8 with the maeve story arc) for this.
— i could maybe see Penelope and him owning a buisness/website together for both their crafts, of course Penelope would run the website and handle all the technical things.
— you and spencer have Penelope over on weekends and off days to chit chat while knitting or painting mugs or canvases. sometimes you’ll invite JJ, Emily, and Derek over but Emily and Derek would drag you away to the kitchen to get wine-drunk and gossip while JJ would be decorating the frames of her kids pictures and copying silly mug designs she found on Pinterest for Will.
— whenever you’re not on a case, and you’re friends aren’t available or you two aren’t feeling ver social, that’s when you finally get to be the sweet, lovey-dovey married couple you two are at heart
— for fun, you guys always bake brownies, cookies, cupcakes, and what not together, that ofc, he insists you take into work to show off his beautiful decorating skills. they’re not that beautiful but you still like to tell him they are to boost his ego and make jokes about how he should work at a bakery. a bakery would never hire him.
— you’ve given him the nickname of ‘cuddle bug’. why? because he’s such a gosh darn cuddle bug. will curl up to your side for hours while you finish any necessary paperwork and you two talk about the most recent case you worked while he’s mindlessly drawing little butterflies and hearts on your back
— after particularly rough cases, he runs you two a bubble bath to just soak in and spend some much needed and well deserved alone time together
— mentioned this in my housewife head canons, but you two would take turns giving each other back, shoulder, foot, or really anywhere needed massages. he’s all fancy with it, bringing out coconut oil and shi but you just let him do his thing, you’re getting a free massage, no need to complain about that
༉‧´ˎ˗ bonus; you two have movie nights every friday where you lounge in the living room eating nachos and watching tv. surprise, he always weasels his way into getting to pick what you watch. even bigger ‘surprise’, it’s always Star Trek or some scientific documentary.
-
anyways, that’s all i can think of for now, but if anyone has anything they want to add, please talk to me about house husband spencer through my inbox !! i will do anything to feminize this beautiful man
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yukinarinn · 2 months
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nsfw alphabet with ethan?? fem reader preferred <3
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A/N: NAH CUZ I’VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT WHAT IF SOMEONE WOULD REQUEST THIS RIGHT AFTER I POSTED THE GALE ONE. Thank you so much!! also I’ll be definitely looking forward to your oneshots.
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Very caring. He isn’t going to sleep with you until you take a shower together and clean each other up, while giving you sloppy kisses. But this might lead to another round…
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
Chad literally had to “boost” Ethan’s confidence somehow by complimenting him, so he doesn’t really have a favorite body part.
But he definitely has one when it comes to you. I’d like to think he’s more into thighs and ass.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Ethan loves cumming inside of you (when you’re on birth control) but is also fine with cumming in your mouth. Seeing you swallow it will most likely get him hard all over again.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Has a plenty of dirty pics/videos with you when you were touching yourself, and all of them are saved in one of the folders from his laptop.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
He never had a girlfriend before, so everything he knows now is just what he experienced with you.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Probably missionary. He loves you clinging onto him while he enters you.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
He’s quiet and like pretty quiet since he’s shy and doesn’t want to embarass himself in any way. But as long as you’re the one who makes jokes, he will keep going!
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Ethan does have some but not too much.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
He’s very gentle at first, sweet kisses and love bites all over your body while he’s inside of you, or, eventually, his fingers doing the job. He can get a bit aggressive but he also calls you a good girl and tells you how good you feel/take him.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
He jerks off when he opens his laptop and accidentally clicks on that folder (or on purpose) He just likes seeing you all vulnerable in his bed.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
He’s got so many kinks (that I’m probably not even aware of myself) since he used to be a virgin and have never been touched by a woman so he just googled them and saw what it fits for him the most. One of the kinks might be the daddy kink one, he gets hard when you call him daddy out of nowhere or in bed.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
In the living room since it’s more spacious for you to fuck. Or in the bathroom, he will force you to look at yourself in the mirror while doing it.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
He gets turned on easily, especially when you walk past him wearing those cute lengerie just for him to see.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
He might be a sadist, but he wouldn’t actually be too rough with you since he doesn’t want to hurt you in any way, unless you want to.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Receiving. It’s just that he still doesn’t know much about females organs so he’s scared he will mess things up if he ever tries to eat you out. He watched several porn that contained it, but he knows porn is different from the real life.
However, you get turned on by giving him oral since he pulls your hair and degrades you and whimpers (🧎🏻‍♀️) when he’s close. It’s a win-win situation.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
As I said, he won’t get rough unless you want him to but usually he’s gentle and pretty slow, he likes taking his time and seeing you turned on and wet just for him. It gives him so much confidence to see that he’s really worth your time (poor guy haven’t dated anyone before you)
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Pretty often if you ask me. You both go to university and you don’t have much time to do anything. However, you wish you had more free time and not use the weekends mostly for sex.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
YEAH, especially when Chad isn’t out with Tara. Chad might be in the kitchen cooking something and Ethan sometimes asks you to let him fuck you while he’s at home but with one condition, holding back your moans. Which you can’t.. but that’s the interesting part!
Talking about other risks, he breeds you and he knows you might get pregnant even with birth control on since the condoms are “out of stock” for y’all 😭 you don’t really use protection. He gets off at the thought of you having his kids. And you probs do too. Fucking weirdos. (hj)
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Many rounds. He can’t get enough of you. If a round you and he think is too short, you’ll go for another one..and another..and the cycle never ends. Till you fall asleep.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
He does own a mini vibrator with a remote control. You can’t even imagine how hard he gets when he sees your tired face while he’s overstimulating you with it.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
I wouldn’t call it teasing, neither would he. He just likes taking his time!!
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
He does whimper when he’s close and curses, stuff like that. At first he tried to hold in but you told him you get turned on whenever you hear those erotic noises he makes.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Phone sex. That’s it.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
I gotta ask, how could you even take it? he’s like 6’5 and has a 7 inch dick, not to mention he also goes to gym and you fold everytime you see him doing push-ups, let alone doing you in bed. (smash)
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Very high. I don’t know what you’ve expected.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Right after you. But he’s a worried cutie patootie so he might ask you several times if you’re okay!
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