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#they get to see people like me and know that it's just another normal part of life
ruershrimo · 3 days
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down bad fr | f.megumi x reader
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@takumifujiwarastan remember how a while back you said here that it sucked how there weren't enough introverted girls, reserved girls etc. SO I did try writing this please enjoy their (gn reader woooo) emotional constipation even though the reticence of their personality isn't really highlighted eurgh
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having a crush on megumi is so fucking stupid. it’s driving you insane. 
you can’t even talk to him. everything he does, everything he says— your heart leaps like a rabbit he casts, and your emotions soar into a terrifyingly messy mishmash of confusion and yearning and infatuation, and then everything in between. 
you feel helpless, vulnerable like this— rendered out of control of your feelings after years of emotional constipation and a harsh strictness on yourself to rein them in like a rowdy horse being whipped during derby matches. you’re a climber, you’re hanging precariously from a cliff with every interaction, a child standing before a blueprint with nothing but toy blocks and a kiddie hammer, a roomba with its sensors malfunctioning— you get the point. those were enough metaphors to delineate your predicament.  
well, he doesn’t even like you anyway, right?
but you want him so badly. 
you just want to hammer it into his thick skull. to just go, ‘hey, I like you even if you may not like me! just go out with me anyway!’ 
yet with each interaction you struggle even more. because how the hell do you confess to fushiguro megumi, much less go out with him and become his partner?
for years romance had remained nothing but a velleity, a nice fantasy you could slip into when your mind demanded respite in the form of escapism and jejune daydreams. but now that your adoration for him has made it all somewhat possible, you don’t know what to do— your control is being tended away from you, and the worst part is that you don’t even mind it that much. 
spiky black hair and eyelashes of silk pass you by, his scent as clean as freshly laundered sheets in hotels. at the start you had thought little about him beyond him being your classmate and eventually just your confidante. yet gradually, you surprised yourself. and everything about him is attractive nowadays: his hair, his pearlescent teeth, the viridian hue of his eyes— hell, he made even the way he drank coffee look like a model of a man in an antediluvian monochrome film of the sixties. and it was so normal, so average, that you were about to slap yourself for the fact that an everyday trait  of his had become something so lovely to look at just because it was him. megumi would hold the cup securely by his lithe fingers, the same one he spouted cursed energy from when summoning his shikigami, before lifting the cup up and bringing the brim to his mouth, his lips that never chapped. 
nobara asks whether he’s drinking black coffee to look cool around and attract people. needless to say, at least you were attracted. 
you hoped he didn’t see the way your face must have blanked out, gaze transfixed on his eyes as he took swigs from his mug. 
why’d he have to be like that?!
megumi continued looking at ozawa, the girl who had a crush on itadori— she was just like you for real, but with double the courage and half the emotional constipation. 
you hoped it would work out for her. that way, perhaps you could muster the strength and bravery to do the same, too. 
you take another look at him. he’s really pretty. had you kicking your feet in the air and all and then screaming in horror because of it, had you wrapped around his finger without even knowing. 
with the help of kugisaki and megumi, ozawa and itadori, the two of them are cajoled to go around tokyo together. it’s the best ‘date’ that the two of them can help the other two have, especially since itadori is dense as rocks (megumi’s probably worse based on your experiences, then) and ozawa is as shy as a touch-me-not flower. 
“oh, and [name],” megumi starts while nobara strolls ahead, all set to begin a new shopping spree. 
“ah— uh, yeah?” you stammer. 
“do you like me? romantically, I mean…” he scratches the back of his neck. 
what the fuck. is this seriously happening? right now? 
“huh? what? I—” 
“no, it’s just that— seeing ozawa made me think. I guess I never considered it an option, but I suppose I have had… feelings for you for a pretty long time…” 
“woah. ah, sorry, I meant— sorry, I’m just very surprised…” you scramble, your hands gesticulating all kinds of things in an exaggerated way of taking it back because yes you like him, you like him a lot— “I mean, I do like you! it’s just, fuck— uh, what do I say— I’m really scared. I thought you didn’t reciprocate at all.” 
“I could tell. but I…” he hesitates, “I overthought everything,” then with a frown, he goes, “gojo would have teased me if he was here.” 
“well, I– uh. we’re lucky he isn’t, I guess?” you pause, “...so what do we do now? are we a thing? are we dating? wait, am I going too fast? I, oh my goodness, I—” 
“would you like to?” he asks. your knees are about to buckle with every second he keeps his eyes on yours. 
“I…— well, I would.” 
“then it’s settled. can I— can I hold your hand, please?” 
“...okay.” 
with trepidation in your hands and your heart pounding in your chest, you inch your hands closer, saline sweat on them as if you’d dipped it into the sea. he keeps his gaze on yours— they’re as unsure as you are, his cheeks a slight scarlet, his eyes swirling with nervousness but a sliver of anticipation, of joy and relief. so he feels exactly the same as you do, then. 
his fingers find yours after a while, tracing along the lines of your palm like a blind man touching something for the first time. you want to learn to love and to memorise each nook and cranny of him starting with his palm, and for once emotional vulnerability is not that bad. 
kugisaki’s in for a shock as soon as she turns around. first it was itadori potentially having a partner before she does, and now megumi? 
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imagine writing this because of being delulu abt an irl crush (i should be studying for my exams.) haha couldn't be me right (i'm so cooked)
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evmrellie · 2 days
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Labyrinth | s.r x gn!reader
summary: You're scared about your feelings for Spencer. Insp by labyrinth from Taylor Swift.
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genre: fluffly and hurt/comfort. pairing: spencer reid x gn!reader (I'm a girl so I wrote going on this way, but I think I didn't gave any descriptions abt being one, so it's totally safe for gn!readers <333 if I did, I'm sorry, I didn't notice.) words: 1,3K warnings: family issues, inexperienced!reader, reader never being in a relationship before, insecurity, anxiety, mention of toxic relationships (not between reader and anyone else) notes: hiii, this is my first oneshot so plss be nice 😭✋🏻 im not used to write like this, but I'm so obsessed with Spencer and I had this idea and I couldn't just let go. English it's not my first language, so forgive me if any mistakes or if u guys don't understand smth. not proofread. hope you guys like it !! <3
It only hurts this much right now
Was what I was thinking the whole time
You've never trusted relationships, not that you had experienced any, but what you saw growing up? What you were used to? Didn't make you want to get into one in the first place.
You never denied that you've dreamed about that; finding a true love and a nice, healthy relationship since you saw all your friends living it. That hurted you a little, but you learned how to live with it.
Breathe in, breathe through
Breathe deep, breathe out
I'll be getting over you my whole life
You tried to catch your breath, adjusting it as much as possible. You were used to unlearn the ability of breathing when you were around people who made you nervous, especially if you had a slightly crush on them. Actually, you unlearn every normal thing that humans do when they interact, it's like a part of your brain stops working and refused to turn it on again. He loved to make you embarrassed, especially in front of pretty nerd ish boys.
The first time you met Spencer it consumed all of your brain chemistry. Day and night making fantasies of how it would be meeting the boy again with the help of destiny, falling in love and maybe being obsessed with you the same way you were with him. But you knew that it was just a fantasy and it would never happen, it was just your brain trying to distract you from the real world and your real problems.
It was a nice escape though.
You know how scared I am of elevators
Never trust it if it rises fast
It can't last
Everything happened so fast in your time vision, it terrified you of how easy he was able to get through it. You were always scared of relationships because, yeah, it was nice and easy to fantasy about it, but to actually live it? That scared the shit out of you. All your Inexperience, insecurities and traumas couldn't be fixed from one day to another.
Everything that you learned from your parents was that if you dived in too quickly, it would be a mistake. Not only from your parents, but also from people you were close to, seeing their relationship rise too fast and going effortlessly and awfully down.
You never understood why they keept doing it, sinking into the same situation over and over again, sometimes with the same or a different guy. How they kept being pulled and compelled by it? You didn't understand because you never felt it.
It was so scary how relationships could rise so fast and sink at the same speed.
Uh oh, I'm falling in love
Oh no, I'm falling in love again
Oh, I'm falling in love
You understood why they kept like that in the worst — best— way possible.
When it first hit you that you were falling in love with Spencer felt like a harsh slap in your face, leaving red bruises and a terrible burning in. You didn't want to accept it, it was frightening to actually let it in.
Was getting hard with the passing time, he wasn't getting any easier and neither were his loving and caring acts. I mean, how could someone like him be so.. careful with you? You felt like a broken piece who would never be loved and receive this kinda of treatment, it was starting to confuse you.
You knew he wasn't the type of person who liked being touched or touching other ones, but with you? Every possibility of being close to you, hugging you, touching your hand and giving a sweet cuddle in that same spot was driving you insane. He made sure that any free time he had, he spent with you. Or even at work, in his free time that he used to call you.
Reid talked to you about his mom and his abandonment issues with his father so openly that made you open yourself with him too. You didn't want to scare him telling him about your family situation or make him think you're a weird, problematic person, but you couldn't let him vent to you and not say a thing. He hasn't change with you. In fact, it only bought you both closer.
You ended up accepting what you felt for him, you didn't want to fight against it, deep down was a comfort feeling. For the first time you felt what everyone around you always talked about. And oh god, it really was an amazing feeling. But no, you would never tell him that. The thought of how this could end so fast after telling him that because probably it wasn't reciprocal, hurted you so bad that keeping it to yourself was the best decision you could make.
I thought the plane was going down
How'd you turn it right around
“Why are you looking at me like that?” His voice called you off of your own thoughts, his Cheshire Cat smile growing as he saw your face turning into a shade of burgundy.
“Like what?” You asked.
“Like a deer lost in the headlights.” He snorted a laugh.
“What?! I'm not-“
He interrupted you, getting up from the chair where he was lost doing his usual puzzles. Spencer walked over to you, resting one of his hands on your face while the other one brushed away a few strands of hair that fell into your eyes. You automatically snuggled your face between Spencer's hands, smirking and closing your eyes, enjoying the gentle caress his fingers made on your cheeks.
“Tell me, please.” He begged you, you could easily hear the smile into his words. He was always so polite, it made you want to scream into a pillow and kick your feets in the air.
You sighed, tired to hide how you felt.
“Honestly? About you. I think I already fell for you.”
It only feels this raw right now
Lost in the labyrinth of my mind
You were scared of his reaction, to look at him and see his eyes falling in pity for you; About him suddenly telling you to go home because he didn't felt the same and saying that this wouldn't work between you two. But to be honest, you couldn't hide anymore, not for him and not for yourself. You needed to break free from this labyrinth you created on your mind, there's no way you could keep up with this and stay cool like it didn't made your chest burn everytime you looked at him.
He surprised you by just laughing softly.
Break up, break free, break through, break down
You would break your back to make me break a smile
“Well, i’m pretty sure i am terriefiedly in love with you.”
You swore that if this was a joke you would combust and turn into a million pieces of yourself, no one would ever find you again.
Your eyes caught up at his sparkling hazel irises that conveyed how much he begged for the same answer. You always felt something carving like a dagger inside your chest when he looked at you like that, like you could break him with any wrong do.
It was absolutely terrifying how easy he broke you to this, to this situation where you could never lie and deny that you felt the exactly same for him. You were head over heels for him. Not in a million of worlds you could imagine that Spencer Reid felt the same thing you did for him, but you were also pretty sure that you were the one who would end up with the heart completely shattered if this ever come to an end.
“I love you so much, Spence.” You said, and then his lips parted open and you were able to feel his sweet taste coming into yours.
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A Song of Ice & Shadow
Part 4
You can read part one, two, three here.
Summary: Y/n is intrigued by a certain illyrian. They open up to one another one night, but she stops it from getting out of control. With Feyre’s return, things get more tense.
Warnings: some angst.
Word count: 2.95K
Like every day, today was no different. Y/n would wake up, stand in front of the mirror for five minutes, bottle up her feelings and go on about her day. 
“How’s Elain?” She asked Nesta, who was sitting in the same armchair as always, a book in her hand.
“Same as she’s been since she got turned” Nesta replied.
“How are you?” she asked, her tone serious and low.
“Never better. I’m free to do whatever I want”.
“Are you? All I’ve seen you do is sit in that armchair, reading books every day since we’ve gotten here”.
“I’m immortal now, what difference does it make if I sit here for one or twenty years? Not everyone wants to venture into the world like you”.
“You’re upset with me” Y/n observed.
“With you, with everyone” Nesta sighed.
“I understand. What can I do to help you?”.
“Nothing. No one can do anything about this”.
Y/n closed her hands into fists, clenching so hard she almost broke her bones “at least we’re all together” she tried to find words to comfort her sister, knowing she's suffered as much as she did, but these were the only words she found, the one she’d tell herself every time she’s about to break down “we’re all together, we made it” she repeated, to which Nesta only nodded.
Taking a deep breath to compose herself, Y/n plastered on a smile, masking the turmoil beneath before entering Elain’s room.
“Elain? How are you feeling today?”.
“I want to go home” Elain repeated, as she had been for the past couple of weeks.
“I know. I want to go home too. Let’s just wait until Feyre gets back” she stroked her sister’s hair and kissed the top of her head before leaving.
Luckily, no one was in the dining room when she entered. The house offered her food, which she ate very slowly.
“Are you alright?” a voice interrupting her trail of thoughts, catching her off guard.
“What?”.
“Are you alright?” Azriel repeated, concern evident in his voice.
“Yes, why?”.
“You’re holding your fork midair” he shifted his eyes to her hand, where was holding the fork.
“Oh, I was just lost in my thoughts” she explained, lowering the fork back onto her plate.
He slid a chair two seats away from her and sat down, a plate full of food appeared in front of him as he dug right in. Her eyes trailed him all the way.
She took another bite of her food, but with a lot on her mind, she had no appetite. She wanted to stand up and leave, but seeing he just got here, she didn’t want him to think she’s leaving because of him and she did not want to be rude. Since when do I care about what other people think? she thought to herself.
“You’re doing it again” Azriel remarked, emitting a soft chuckle.
She placed her fork back down “how’s spying going?” She inquired, distracting herself from her thoughts, but also out of curiosity, not that she’d admit it.
“‘The spying’ is going slow, but we’re making progress” a smile remained plastered on his face.
“Why are you smiling?”.
“No one has phrased that question like that before”.
“Well, there’s a first time for everything”.
As they sat in silence, Azriel hesitated before speaking again “how are you coping? I can only imagine how you must feel, it’s not easy becoming fae when you hate our kind” it wasn’t a confrontation, but acknowledgment of what he’d observed.
“No, it’s not. But as you can see, I’m doing well” she lied. Not wanting to push her further, he only nodded.
“Do you sleep upside down like bats?” she spontaneously asked, making him choke on his drink from the peculiar question.
“No. No, I do not. I sleep like normal people” his eyes furrowed with curiosity as he turned to face her.
“How would I know” she shrugged “you do have wings of a bat… I just thought you had other characteristics of a bat as well” she added.
“Like what?”.
“Do you bite- or drink blood?”.
“Only when asked to” a smile tugged at his lips “and no, I don’t drink blood. Any other clarification I can assist you with?.
“No, not at the moment” she struggled to hide her amusement.
“Oh, you poor thing! But don’t worry, I’ve come to rescue you” Cassian said to his brother, as he strode in, noticing the two of them sitting alone.
She rolled her eyes at him “I was just leaving”. “And just for the future, when you want to rescue someone, maybe do it before the end” she advised before walking out
Azriel kept a stern expression before standing up himself.
“Where are you going?” Cassian asked.
“I finished eating”.
“You’re just gonna leave me alone?”.
“You’ll do fine on your own” he patted his brother’s shoulders.
—-
Y/n had always had trouble sleeping at night, but ever since her new life at the Night Court, her nightmares increased. Unable to sleep, she went upstairs to the roof. This space had become her comfort place when she needed to escape the things that plagued her sleep. Seeing as Cassian trained in the morning and Azriel being away most of the time, she thought no one would be here at night time. Reaching the training ground, occupied by her thoughts, she paid no attention to who was there. Fiddling with the blue celestite necklace around her neck, she reached the edge and looked up at the sky. Three bright stars decorating the visibly huge mountain, Ramiel.
“What’s on your mind?” sleek like the shadows, Azriel approached, snapping her back to reality.
Blinking rapidly, she muttered “don’t you ever sleep? Even bats do” Y/n quipped, attempting to deflect.
“In the morning”.
“Are you referring to the bats or yourself?”.
“Both” he let out a soft chuckle.
“As I recall, you’re awake in the early mornings, so how many hours do you sleep?”.
“Enough to keep me going. What about you? You’re awake”.
“But I do sleep in the morning. In case you haven't noticed, I eat breakfast when you’re all having lunch or dinner” Y/n reminded.
“I have noticed... You still haven’t answered my question” Azriel persisted.
“What question?”.
“What’s on your mind?”.
“Nothing”.
“If that were true, you wouldn’t be staring into nothingness all day” he pointed out.
“I’m fine. It does not concern you”.
“Alright, how about I share something personal about me, and you can tell me what’s bothering you?” Azriel offered.
“And why would I want that?”.
“Out of curiosity. I’ve also noticed you like knowing things, especially when it concerns your sisters and yourself. So, go ahead, ask me anything you want? Anything you want to know”.
She contemplated for a while. “What happened to your hands?” she blurted out, one of her hands remained fiddling with the necklace.
He did not anticipate her question, but still, he answered “my brothers” he cleared his throat “my half-brothers thought it would be fun to see what’d happen when you mix oil and fire with our quick healing gifts” he explained, and shadows wrapped tighter around him.
“How old were you then?” she asked, her voice low and soft.
“Eight” a hint of darkness gleamed in his eyes.
“Were they punished?”.
“Eventually”.
“So, your father did nothing, as his flesh and blood was set on fire?” her tone shifted, her face contorted with anger.
“I am a bastard, while my half-brothers are his legitimate sons. In his eyes, they are his flesh and blood” he clarified.
“It makes no difference. You’re his son, nonetheless” she shook her head, tightening her grip on her necklace.
“It did to him”.
“What about your mother? Is she-”.
“That’s another personal question. We agreed on one. Now, it’s your turn”.
“What do you want to know?”.
“What’s been bothering you? And don’t say transitioning, you’re more concerned today”.
“I went to see Elain today. I know it takes time to heal, and I know I shouldn’t interfere with her healing process, but it- it ‘s so hard to just stand by and do nothing. I want to help her, and she doesn’t want my help. Even if she did, I don’t know what to do and how to help her. Her wedding was supposed to be in a few weeks” she sighed “ I worry about Nesta, too. Although she seems fine, I know she’s not. She used to tell me everything, and now she’s hiding from me” she opened up for the first time. Realizing that, she regretted it immediately and didn’t know why she agreed to that stupid deal. With the shadows whispering into his ears, Azriel discerned her discomfort “that necklace, do you always hold it when you’re feeling… a strong emotion?” Azriel asked, attempting to change the subject.
“I-” she looked down at her hand wrapped around the necklace ”I suppose. I never gave it a thought” she lowered her hand,releasing her grip on the necklace.
“That necklace, where did you get it from?” his eyes narrowed as he recognized the stone. She never took off that necklace, but today was the first time he'd spotted it. After all, it’s not polite to stare down at a lady’s chest, and being the gentleman he is, he never looked.
“It was a gift from my mother, why?”.
“It’s a rare stone, only found in certain places” he explained.
“You recognize it?”.
“I’ve seen something similar once or twice, but I could be mistaken”.
“I don’t think it’s from anywhere in Prythian. My mother hated your- our kind. She’d never take or gift me anything related to us” Y/n stated and his shadows danced around her.
“Why do you hate our kind so much?”.
“That is another personal question. We agreed on one” she repeated his words to him “and I’m not making another deal with you. I’ve already said way too much” Y/n retorted.
“What are you so afraid of?”.
“More questions” an amused smile crept onto her face.
“Fair enough” he raised his hands in surrender “don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone about tonight”.
“Good night, shadowsinger” Y/n said, heading swiftly towards the stairs and his shadows slowly retracted.
“Good night, Y/n” he murmured in a subdued tone as he watched her leave. That night, for the first time in a very long time, Azriel slept peacefully. 
The following day, Y/n didn’t go out to eat breakfast or lunch but she went out for dinner. Upon arrival. She found Cassian seated in his usual spot. Ignoring his presence, she took a seat, hoping for a peaceful meal.
“No mean comments tonight?” Cassian quipped.
“I was literally minding my own business. What do you want, you brute bastard?” Y/n replied sharply.
“There we go” he smirked.
“Your brother won't be joining us?”.
“Which one?”.
“The somewhat civilized decent one”.
“I’m assuming you mean Az. He left early this morning. He’ll be gone for a while. Why do you ask?... Aw, don’t tell me you have a thing for my handsome brother” Cassian teased.
She huffed “you wish…without him here, a war would start and I’d rather not get my hands dirty” she retorted, taking her plate and heading for the exit.
“It’s cute that you think you can take me. Perhaps if you trained with me long enough, you’d be a worthy opponent, but still, even then I doubt you’d defeat me” he taunted, his smugness evident.
“Piss off” Y/n snapped.
“Did I hurt your feelings?” he mocked.
“It would take much more than that to do so, especially coming from you” Y/n replied dismissively.
“And why is that?”.
“You simply don’t matter enough to me, to even consider anything you say, good or bad” she shrugged before leaving.
“Ouch” he murmured.
Being aware that Feyre was returning today, Y/n went to check on Elain before her arrival. However, what she found when she got to her sister’s room left her in shock.
��What the fuck is he doing here?” Y/n spat out, her voice seething with anger. Lucien was standing in the doorway as Feyre left Elain’s room and closed the door behind her.
“Y/n, wait. I can explain” Feyre interjected.
“You brought him here? To see Elain? The fucking monster who sold us out to Hybern” her words were laced with deep-seated hatred.
“It’s more complicated than that, and he is her mate” Feyre reminded.
“He’s no such thing to her”.
“I just wanted to see her” Lucien tried to clarify.
“You don’t get to speak” Y/n pointed her finger at him.
“Y/n, he’s our guest. He will be staying with us” Feyre declared.
“You would let the man who ruined our lives, who ruined our sister’s marriage stay here with us?” she took a deep breath, trying to control her rage.
“If you would calm down and let me explain, you’ll understand-” Feyre urged.
“I’ll calm down when he’s gone. Do not let him near Elain, if you want him to stay in one piece” she warned, shooting Lucien with a glare before storming out.
“I take it you weren’t thrilled to see your sister?” Cassian smirked as Y/n passed him.
“Not in the mood today for your bullshit, brute”.
—-
The next time Y/n saw Feyre was at dinner, attended by Rhy’s inner circle, her sisters if they desired, and Lucien. She was reluctant to go, but fearing Elain might attend and be in the same room as that monster, with no one seemingly having a problem with him, she decided to go. She had arrived slightly later than everyone else. Feyre was sat next to Nesta, Rhys on her other side, Amren across from her, Cassian next to Amren, Azriel beside him, Mor opposite of him and Lucien across from Nesta, leaving two seats vacant, one next to Az and the other next to Mor. They were talking about flying lessons when she entered, dressed in a long-sleeved black gown with silver glitter that exposed her collar bones and back. Only the metal part of her necklace was visible. The upper part of the dress embraced her curves, while the lower part flowed like liquid silk as it draped over her figure. Knowing her temper, everyone stopped talking, if only to see what she’s about to say or do or who she’d pick a fight with. To their surprise, she did neither as she glanced at Azriel and took a seat beside Mor.
“What happened to you?” Y/n asked Azriel, gesturing to the wine splattered across his chest and neck. He looked down, only noticing it when she pointed it out.
“Mor spewed her wine when she heard Feyre wanted to learn how to fly” Cassian explained with a  grin.
“You have wings?” a question directed at her sister.
“Yes, I can shape-shift”. At that, the conversation continued.
“I can teach you” Azriel offered, elaborating that the other two Illyrians had been trained at such a young age that they barely remember it. To which Cassian countered they still teach the younglings the basics, which ended with Azriel explaining that it’s not the same for older individuals, and that there are fears and mental blocks. Everyone fell silent and something inside of Y/n stirred. She wondered if he was talking about his experience, not forgetting the conversation they had where he told her about his past. She did not know a lot, but seeing as his own brothers burned his hands, they probably restricted him from flying or participating in anything that would give him any kind of power.
Feyre proceeded to ask her sisters for help against the king of Hybern. Explaining that with training they could potentially close the holes expanded by the cauldron. Amren offered to train the sisters, which Y/n refused, unwilling to take part in any of this. Despite the growing frustration among the others, Feyre was grateful that at least one of her sisters was willing to help. She explained that they might need their assistance during the meeting with the high lords and this time, both sisters rejected.
“People’s lives might depend on your accounts of it. The success of this meeting might depend upon it” Feyre clarified.
“Don’t talk down to me. My answer is no” Nesta asserted, while Y/n remained silent, watching the exchange between her sisters before Nesta stormed out. Now all eyes were on her.
“Y/n, please. We need your help” Feyre begged.
“Do you know what you're asking of me?” Y/n narrowed her eyes.
“I do. And I understand your hatred of our kind, but we-”.
“You understand nothing. All my life, I have helped you. I have dedicated my life to you, to Nesta, to Elain, and never have I once asked for anything in return. But helping you and your new found family is what got us into this mess. And now what? You expect us to go to that meeting that is full of entitled bastards who did nothing all these years, who don’t care about us, about mortals and beg them for help? I would rather see them all burn and their kingdoms or courts reduced to ashes” Y/n delivered the chilling words with an unsettling calmness, her voice devoid of any hint of emotion “and just as Nesta said, if you dare bring Elain into this, I’ll be the one delivering your throat to her” she glared at everyone in the room before leaving and slamming the door shut behind her.
Taglist: @st4r-girl-official @judig92 @5onedirection5 @nayaniasworld @blackgirlmagicforever @stained-glass-eyes0708 @slytherintaco @aehllitas-blog
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poly-alt-partner · 2 days
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Hide and Seek - Colby Brock X Fem!Reader - Part 1
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Summary: You join Sam, Colby, and The Boys on an investigation of Geelong Gaol in Australia. After the intro of the video, Sam and Colby set up their first 'challenge' of the night - Hide and Seek! What happens when Colby finds you first?
Info: I did write a few parts that happened in the video (especially the beginning). Hopefully it's not a spoiler to anyone who hasn't watched the latest upload!
Warnings: Dark rooms, cussing, some spicy interactions with Colby😉(will be in part 2)
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While you weren't new to ghost hunting and investigating haunted locations, you had never been to a haunted prison like Geelong Gaol. With an estimated 500+ deaths on the grounds, it was no wonder that there would be activity in the once active cells and hallways. Although you were joined by more people than usual there was still an uneasy feeling in your gut.
Before going on tour with the guides and learning more about the history everyone met in the main hallway. For the introduction you and Colby followed Sam around the corner while Juicy, Narrator, Mully, Eddie, and Josh stayed by the stairs.
"Not only did we bring (y/n) to Australia with us..." Sam pointed the camera towards you as the three of you walked back down the hall. You smiled and waved quickly before Sam turned back towards the corridor.
"We are also here with The Boys!" You watched as the group leaned in close to one another and shouted in excitement. Despite being in such a creepy location everyone was hyped up and happy to be together. Seeing how everyone interacted and got along was comforting at least.
Sam pointed out that everyone (including you) were wearing black while he was in a bright orange jumper. After a few more minutes of talking and plugging the merch, Colby took the camera from Sam. Sam got a little more serious and turned towards the bigger group.
"Alright, who's the believer of the group?" Sam inquired towards the five men.
Eddie chimed in first. "I started off as a nonbeliever and I'm the biggest bitch in the whole group."
You couldn't help but laugh and nod to yourself. There were definitely times that you would have preferred to bounce from a location when things got serious. But in all honesty, who didn't have moments like that?
"I am very skeptical," Mully started. "But I also leave places being like 'How do we explain this?'"
So far Mully has definitely been the type to be spooked by any clear evidence. He also has a habit of telling things to 'f*ck off' when it's getting too real. You can't really blame him, though. It's still hard to believe some of the things you've experienced through the years.
"Before we get into any of the history, we do have a little challenge for you guys." Upon hearing this you glance over at Colby curiously, having not heard of this prior.
"So we're all gonna split up."
"Already?" Mully's voice pitches a little higher than normal.
"Before we know anything, everyone needs to isolate themselves and we are gonna play hide and seek."
Excuse me? I did not sign up for this. You exchange glances with Juicy and Narrator. They can also tell you didn't know about this. In spite of the new information Mully and Eddie started cracking jokes. However you weren't entirely confident with running around in such an unfamiliar place.
Sam continues to explain the challenge. "Winner of hide and seek gets to choose one person to do the first investigation in solitary confinement." The Boys groan and you can't help but agree with them. If I can't win, I hope the winner doesn't choose me to investigate alone.
"(Y/n) you can either do rock, paper, scissors to be a seeker or you can opt out to be someone that hides," Colby says, noticing how tense you seemed. You should honestly be used to challenges like these by now.
"I'll just hide so one of you two have to find me."
You see Colby smirk a little before turning back to Sam to see who would be seeking. As far as you knew, Colby always lost when they did rock, paper, scissors. But you noticed the glint in his eye and wondered if his losing streak would continue.
Initially Colby had won, meaning Sam would be seeker. However, he decided he wanted to try again to see if Colby would lose. Lo and behold, Colby lost again and was now designated seeker. Your heart raced a little at the thought of hiding alone in the dark and you kind of hoped to lose quickly. Losing the game was better than being alone for more than a few minutes.
As soon as everyone had their own cameras it was time to split up. Everyone started running to find the best hiding spot, including you. Eddie and Juicy seem to be shaking hands as you run past them and some of the display cases. You duck into a small room not far from them and crouch behind the door.
"Everyone ran ahead of me," You whisper to the camera. "If I'm lucky, Colby will just run past to investigate the cells." You glance around the small room at some text but decide that reading isn't a good idea right now. You decide to zoom in with the camera in case it's needed for the footage.
"Who's gonna be fucking found first?!" Colby's voice echoes around the building, causing you to cover your mouth and turn the camera back to you. You stifle a laugh as you hear Colby walking around, being a goofball. Honestly you wouldn't mind being found first but obviously you weren't going to give up that easily.
Listening intently you hear Colby getting closer, saying he heard laughter. You realize that he must have heard you laughing. You look into the camera with wide eyes and think about holding your breath. Somehow you just feel giddy and excited about playing this game, almost forgetting that you're in Geelong Gaol.
Too scared to talk and expose your hiding spot you put a finger to your lips and shake your head. There's no way I'm going to make it that easy on him.
It's almost impossible to not laugh as you hear Colby begin sniffing around audibly like a dog sniffing a trail. Luckily you hardly ever wear perfume so he wouldn't be able to actually 'sniff you out.'
The camera in your hand is still focused on you. You hold your breath as you hear his footsteps inching closer and closer.
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Aaaaand, that's part 1! I wanted to break it up because it was getting a little long. Let me know how it is so far!
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cara-dreamer · 21 hours
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TikTok has found IHNMAIMS. I do have a mouth and I am about to scream if they don’t stop with the worst takes I’ve ever seen in my life. I know Tumblr isn’t known for its media literacy but it’s gotta be better than this. I don’t know how to add the keep reading so uh long post incoming.
Some woman: I just feel absolutely awful for Ellen. She didn’t deserve any of that.
Some man: Um ackchually the guys didn’t deserve any of that either!
I AM SHAKING YOU BY THE SHOULDERS THAT IS THE POINT! None of them deserve what they’re going through!
We also have the babygirlification of AM but like beyond what’s normal. (I will say I’m not a completely innocent bystander there. I love pathetic little meow meows.) However, I have been a fan of the story for years and years and recognize that he’s still an irredeemable monster. I am not having a good time seeing people trying to justify why they like him by minimizing that. Just post the “hear me out” and move on. Your taste in fiction says nothing about your moral leanings, but defending it and arguing to justify it does. It forces you to make up a moral stance, usually a bad one.
I’m not including the person that drew AM as a Tumblr sexyman with the intent of pissing people off. That’s just funny.
Another is these people forgetting what an unreliable narrator is. There was someone who commented on a video talking about it, “So you think you know their experience better than them?” YES THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT THEYARE SAYING!
They can’t handle a narrator that doesn’t always tell the truth and doesn’t have perfect morals or perfectly accurate information on events.
And then there’s the talk about the author. Maybe just chill out. You’re not a bad person for enjoying fiction by bad people, especially since he’s been dead for a while now. Talking about and critically analyzing his cool short story isn’t showing support. I enjoy the works of Lovecraft, but I’m not a fan of the racism. That’s where the “critical” part comes into play. Just enjoy the story for what it is.
The only people I have some patience and grace for are the ones that are pointing out genuine questions raised. They at least had their brain on while reading. Seeing “Did you know the title probably refers to both the protagonist and antagonist?” or “Is AM still limited in his power to only be a tool of destruction, even now?” gives me some hope. Also the crack ship of AM and the Qu. That’s the kind of dumb content we should be getting out of it.
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gachagon · 22 hours
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Oh so that's what everyone was freaking out for 😭 tbh I have been saying since day 1 that Kaiser doesn't actually care about Ness and that he really has just been keeping him around to literally use him. But I won't act like Ness isn't going along with it or that on some level he doesn't know. I think Ness does know and just doesn't care because being next to Kaiser for any reason or excuse is still good even if Kaiser doesn't have the same level of obsession as Ness holds.
However I think we're getting close to seeing Kaiser really lose it and Noa knows it too.
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However just what that rock bottom will look like and what else it'll take for him to really go that far down is a mystery to me. It could be Ness joining Isagi, it could be him not scoring another goal this game etc.
I think Kaiser's inability to understand other people's kindness and compassion makes it impossible for him to really change just because Ness cares about him. He's gonna have to get an ego that's more sustainable if he wants to continue his career.
This chapter reminded me of a few things but most notable was when Kaiser was remembering how it felt to make other people lose and fall into despair because he was the reason their dreams were crushed. That part really reminded me of Isagi and Niko's game and how Isagi admitted to himself that he didn't care if winning meant the other team losing everything in the process because the feeling of victory itself is too good and rewarding.
I think it really just hammers home how similar Kaiser and Isagi really are because they both really do think of soccer in the same way.
This chapter also brings that ancient question from Snuffy back up. "What are you without football?"
And I think Kaiser knows that without the game he truly has nothing, no plan, no ambitions. His goal to make everyone in the soccer world hate him by proxy of him winning all of the games is egotistical, but being better doesn't mean people will hate you, so his goal is short sighted and something that won't last long.
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Now I'm going to say something that I think might be controversial to some people.
Okay here it goes.
I don't think Isagi hates Kaiser. I think Isagi is completely neutral towards him and even understands his intensity on some level and THAT is the issue between them. I think it's both a combination of Isagi and Kaiser being too similar (which in turn means Isagi is in Kaiser's head and vice versa) but that Isagi doesn't hate Kaiser at all and holds no real animosity towards him, even though Kaiser has made his displeasure of Isagi very obvious.
Really think about it too, because Kaiser has done SO many things that would normally piss anyone off. His motivation to make people hate him because it's the only way he really understands how to socialize with people, puts his first meeting with Isagi into perspective. The whole "calling him Yoichi" thing even after Isagi corrects him, constantly getting in Isagi's personal space even after Isagi openly says "hey you're kinda close...", even during the first little scrimmage between them when Kaiser openly steals the ball and looks to Isagi like he expects Isagi to blow up at him and be absolutely pissed. It all points to Kaiser deliberately trying to rile Isagi up and foster some resentment in Isagi.
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But instead Isagi has done nothing but continue to hold the same kind of "hate" that he has for Kaiser that he holds for the rest of his rivals. Yeah Isagi isn't afraid to talk shit but off the field? He acts completely indifferent to it all, as if Kaiser doesn't get under his skin when he's not playing the game which kind of shocks me.
I feel like out of the many rivals that Isagi has, Kaiser is the one who has tried the hardest to be the absolute bane of his existence and it just isn't working at all. Kaiser is annoying and a nuisance and an all around jerk when playing. And Isagi understands that totally and still it doesn't bother him.
He's not thinking of how much he hates Kaiser and is treating Kaiser like a person. A human being with thoughts and feelings. And Kaiser doesn't understand why at all because he truly has just been nothing but a huge asshole this entire time 😭 And we know from this very chapter that Kaiser doesn't understand why anyone would treat him in that way since he's never been treated like that at all. He doesn't know how to have a normal relationship with people at all or how to have a healthy rivalry with Isagi, and Isagi doesn't care about any of that and still decides to treat him like he would any other player on the field who's got amazing skill.
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And I think what really drives this home is that Isagi has also admired Kaiser's skill in football in a way where he wants to learn. Isagi knows that Kaiser is extremely talented at the game and that he could pull things off Isagi couldn't even dream of. The admiration is different from the kind most people have given Kaiser because unlike Ness, Isagi hasn't centered Kaiser to such a total degree that he's the only thing keeping him going and unlike the other players on the field Isagi isn't driven by jealousy.
He knows when people are better at him and instead of breeding hatred in him, he wants to get closer to these people, he wants to ask their advice and for them to help him get better. Think about all the times he's just straight up gone to Rin and Kunigami and Barou for advice on what to do even though it's clear they think very poorly of him 😭
So if it's not malice that drives Isagi and it isn't Jealousy and it's not obsession, then what DOES drive Isagi Yoichi? That's what Kaiser can't figure out because Isagi isn't like the other hundreds of players that he's gone up against, and Isagi doesn't treat him like every other player does.
Really this is the best chapter we've gotten in terms of Kaiser more and how he thinks and how he got this way. It makes me want more chapters just so I can see how he comes with losing so completely and getting treated like a human being from a guy he fucking hates.
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Note
HELLOOO <33333
Um can we ask weird things? If the answer is 'yes' then I want to ask what main characters do when that person who is very important for them got deadly injured and almost dying in front their eyes?? - Holy crap this be really angsty request-
(And yes in your main AU [I really loved this AU you've made it so well bro'])
(ALSO I WANT TO SAY I REALLY LOVE STEPHANIE SO SO MUCH TOO!!!!)
HIIIIIIIIII<33333333
Oh don't worry at all, it's not weird, it's just a regular angst scenario topic so you're absolutely fine, don't worry. I thought it would be something actually weird that I can't write so you can only imagine how much I relaxed after reading the rest.
I won't let seasonal allergies stop me from writing for you!
And yep that's very very angsty and we love angst in this house so that's fine.
BRO THANK YOU SO MUCH I really like this AU too even though I try to keep it simple. Thank you thank you thank you!!!!!
(STEPH STEPH STEPH WAAAAAA I LOVE HER SO SO MUCH EVEN I IF CAN'T READ COMICS ANYMORE STEPHHHHH MY LOVE IT'S REALLY NICE TO SEE AN ANOTHER STEPH FAN)
(Am I talking too much for introduction parts?)
Main Characters' reaction to someone loved's deadly wounds
-Jeff The Killer
If such a situation happens, Jeff will definitely lose his mind, which has already a little left. Let alone killing one of the few people in the world he considers worthy of caring for, no one has the right to open the slightest wound except himself. Even he has no right to such deep wounds.
He calmly holds the person standing in front of him and puts his ears against his chest so that he can hear his heartbeat. The moment he hears that faint heartbeat sound, he relaxes and tries to take the injured person on his arms and take them to the nearest person with medical knowledge. And along the way, he keeps saying that it's forbidden for that person to die.
He just doesn't want to lose another person he cares about. He doesn't want to feel another ghost's cold hands strangling him on his neck. And he's going to blame himself no matter what the situation is. Until there is news about that person, he will argue with the people who are taking care of them and gain even more hate, but as long as that person is with him, there is no problem.
Possible persons that he will give this reaction: Liu, Clockwork, Sally, Nina(?)
-Clockwork
She'll just freeze up because she can't understand what's going on. Although she is normally quite a cold-blooded person, she forgets what she should do in a panic because the sight in front of her causes cracks in her frozen heart.
However, she soon recovers herself and runs to that person. Without asking any questions or caring if their heart is still beating, she takes that person to the nearest medical doctor, even though Jack is her preference. She's so angry that she has to get it out of somewhere. But since her stress will dominate her, she waits by their side until the moment they're awake and leaves when they seem to open their eyes. If there is a funeral, she will not attend it and will pay as visit as soon as she gathers courage which will take weeks for her.
The grip of the past once again squeezes her heart. And this time in a more painful way than ever. It's all her fault for not being able to protect the one she loves. No. It's all the fault of the people who love her for making them an important person to her. No matter how painful it is, she will isolate herself because it is the only way she believes they will not be harmed any more.
Possible persons that she will give this reaction: Toby, Jeff, Nina, Zero
- Hoodie
As someone who has already faced the death of his loved ones and almost himself many times, he should be used to such situations, but he's not. No matter how many times it happens, he hasn't gotten used to this painful feeling, and he won't get used to it either. But because he is considered experienced, he knows what he has to do.
First, he will check the pulse of that person, and if it is still beating, he goes to one of the medics while applying some pressure to their wound. Since he called all three of them by phone or transceiver and informed them on the way, it would give them an opportunity to prepare. Along the way, he also tries to convince that person that there is no problem.
Although he wants to be with his business partner until they wake up, he first needs to give a report about what he saw. If that person wakes up, he will take a more careful attitude towards them in the tasks they go out together, because the memories that come before his eyes at any moment are already too painful. If they do not wake up, he visits their grave regularly, even though he buries a part of himself with him every time, he is likely to cry at the first one.
Possible persons that he will give this reaction: Tim, Toby(?)
-Masky
When he firstly sees that the person in front of him is so seriously injured, he runs to them and calmly asks what is going on while pressing on their wounds. He tries to act as coolly as possible, then goes to the nearest medical person, Ann by preference. During this time, he does not let that person down from his arms, nor does he try to talk to them in any other way.
He goes out often because he can't bear to stand next to that person while they're being treated, but he returns to that environment because he feels guilty, and such a vicious cycle occurs. He stands without saying a word, chain-smoking in the hope of reducing his tension. Tim is ready to do everything for the person takes care of his business partner's needs without opposing it for the first time.
In fact, although he looks very calm on the outside during the entire process, there is a literally devastating storm inside. His emotions are constantly at war, and when no one is looking, he can't control himself and makes fists out of his hands. Since he knows that he absolutely cannot bear to lose another person he will remember, he is ready to do anything so that the angel of death does not knock on that person's door. Even if it means destroying himself in the process.
Possible persons that he will give this reaction: Brian
-Ticci Toby
The moment Toby sees that sight, his tics triggered by elements such as fear and adrenaline will increase incredibly. Because of the look he sees in front of him, some of his past memories will come back before his eyes, and he will be even worse off, almost unable to do anything. If he is not alone, his partner does the work of taking care of that person, but if he is alone, he tries to collect himself.
Although he hates himself for staying so still, it's not easy for him to shake off the trauma of both the past and the present. As soon as he pulls himself together, he puts pressure on the wounds, calls one of the other people he trusts the most and lets them know. If no one answers the phone or radio call, he will screw everything and call the ambulance.
He can't lose another person. Another person he cares about can't close their eyes forever because of his incompetence. They're not allowed to leave him alone, so that person has to heal no matter what. And if they get well- no, when they get well Toby will never leave after them again. Because he can't bear to see another face he remembers dimly in the darkness that preys on his nightmares.
Possible persons that he will give this reaction: Natalie, Kate, Rouge, (Eyeless) Jack, Nina
-Eyeless Jack
Since he knows medicine and took care of people he has loved before, he should not worry about this situation. Okay, but then why do his hands shake every time he presses on the bleeding area? Why can't he keep his cool attitude? Why, why, why? He actually knows the reason for this. He knows, but he doesn't want to admit it to himself. He doesn't want to admit that he has a weakness others can use against him.
He tries to take care of their wound on his own and tries to do something using things like bandages, oxygenated water, sewing thread, which he usually carries in his backpack while walking in the forest, but when he realizes that this is not enough, he swears and takes that person on his back. He takes them on his back towards his own infirmary.
He'll let Ann and Smiley know, but he doesn't know why he's calling since he won't let them do anything when they come to his cabin. Eventually, Ann takes control and tells Jack to rest. Jack also waits for the result in a waiting chair with black tears pouring from his eyes. The most intense emotion he feels after sadness is disappointment and fear.
Possible persons that he will give this reaction: Toby, Sally, Kate
-Jane The Killer
When an injured person comes across, of course, she wants to help them, but when she sees who this person is, she suddenly pauses. She freezes inside her mind and can't do anything. She can only watch the landscape with tears in her eyes until she regains the ability to think again.
And when she becomes able to do something, she calls the ambulance, not caring about her money and things that should remain secret for government's sake. She can't lose the one she loves and she needs to save them. So she presses on the deepest wounds of that person until the ambulance arrives, and tries to keep her voice calm, stroking their hair. It's very important for that person to know that they will be saved, it's maybe for the injured person, maybe for Jane.
She can't afford to lose another person. Having become so strong, she cannot accept returning to the age of thirteen, when she is incapable of protecting her loved ones again. She needed to be a stronger person, she needed to be able to help her loved ones. She couldn't have devoted her whole life to nothing, she couldn't have. Whoever dares to harm the one she loves will taste the bitterest death at her hands.
Possible persons that she will give this reaction: Mary
-X-Virus
Cody is normally someone who is quite overcome by his emotions, and he is calm in the face of this incident in a way that he does not understand either. In fact, he feels as if someone else has taken over his body. He does a little first aid work with the help of his medical knowledge, which he knows more or less, and the painkillers he carries with him, as well as oxygenated water. He also informs the ambulance before starting to administer first aid.
Although he cares a lot about this person, he should disappear when the ambulance arrives. But during this process, he holds the person's hand and tells them to stay calm, that he will always watch over them even if he is not with them, and when they get better, he will help them escape. Since he sucks at this kind of calming stuff, he tries to do his best, but he proceeds with a solution-oriented approach.
He has never lost someone he loves because there was no one who really cared about him before. These feelings are very alien to him and he hates it. He is ready to dislocate his heart to destroy the painful feeling he feels in his heart. As long as se doesn't have to experience the terrible pain he feels all the time for others. Because he doesn't think he can stay as strong as others on this topic.
Possible persons that he will give this reaction: Toby, Ann
-Nina The Killer
She knows the pain of this because she has experienced a big loss before. She killed her parents when Zalgo controlled her to cause difficulty for Slenderman, and she suffered incredibly great emotional pain when she regained control just the moment where she plunged a knife into the heart of her dearest little brother Chris, and she still does. As a nurse who takes it upon herself to wipe the invisible bloodstains on her hands, she has knowledge of first aid, but when she sees this sight, she definitely can't help being shocked. Due to the job of a nurse, she has seen much worse, but none of them was someone she loved so much.
She knows what she has to do. She carries a spare bandage in her bag at all times and is able to wrap some of the wounds and give first aid. She tries to tear off pieces of her own clothes and treats the wounds with missing cloth, she also wants to call the hospital where she works. But later she remembers that this will put her own career at risk, and she calls anyway. An ambulance comes and picks up her injured loved one, while Nina is crying the whole way.
When they arrive at the hospital, her friends won't let her take care of them. She tries to be there for them but no matter what she does, her colleagues who really value her as a friend keep her away. She's absolutely incredibly remorseful, and she knows that when this person gets out, they'll be angry that she didn't take them to Jack or Ann or even Smiley. And her own career was ruined because she brought a killer and cried for them, but she doesn't care. As long as she doesn't lose anyone again. As long as the memory bracelet on her arm doesn't add a new bead.
Possible persons that she will give this reaction: Kate, Clockwork, Toby, Jeff, Sally
-Kate The Chaser
Kate has a lot of experience in this situation. She was also very seriously injured herself and worried other people. Nevertheless, she is angry with herself for not being able to stop her heart from being filled with fear. She runs to that person, puts her unmasked face close to their face and tries to reassure them that they will be fine. After calling all the medics and informing them, she applies a small-scale bandage operation with her clothes.
After deciding that they are better, she takes that person on her arms, regardless of their weight, and takes them to the nearest medical person. If they say that they can't do anything, that it's too late, she threatens them, and if they don't agree again, she'll leave the forest and call the ambulance. She will not allow even the person she allowed herself to love to die. No matter what the cost is.
And during the whole process of taking care of this wound, she gives scary looks and stands next to this person. She's not allowed to sleep or rest until she's sure that they're okay. She had lost her own life before, but thanks to this person, she has a life again, and she will not allow them to lose their own. Even if that person dies, Slenderman will bring them back to life because he wants his best proxy not to disrupt his duties, but Kate knows that this is not the same thing, so she is still trying to make that person live. She's not ready to lose that person and she never will be.
Possible persons that she will give this reaction: Nina, Toby, Rouge(?)
I think I get the request wrong
Also I don't know why Nina's part is always the longest even though she's not my fave, it's Clockwork.
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nqmonarch · 1 day
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Aeon Lover AU Part 2
Characters: Aha, IX
Note: This AU I plan to eventually make Yandere, not in this part but I feel like it's good to let people (my fellow small crowd of Aeon lovers) know.
You stared at Aha's human form, not breaking eye contact as a manic grin stayed on their face. "So you're Aha?"
"Maybeee, maybe I am, maybe I'm not! Does it matter? I'm just here to help you!" They said trying to act all innocent, and blinking their long eye lashes once and then twice.
You paused for a moment, observing the person in front of you. You took a step forward and Aha remained still completely oblivious to your nefarious intentions. You reached your hands out to them and they immediately grabbed them with their own, interlocking them. Holy shit-- your whole body overloaded with that move as your face begin to burn and jumped away.
"Wasn't that what you were trying to do?" Aha asked coyly, smiling at you and holding their empty hand out to you.
You grabbed onto their hand, trying to move it out of the way of their body, "No, I'm trying to undress you," Aha froze at your words mouth twitching, "This body is just a medium right? I'm hoping you didn't steal it... But if you created it I want to see if there's any discrepancies between it and a human body." Perhaps there'd be some kind of dead give away?
The only thing that suggested that Aha wasn't human was their other worldly beauty. "Why did you choose to be so attractive anyway? How much can you change your form?" You asked leaning closer to observe them, a small mole rested beneath the tip of their left eye.
Now that Aha's hand was successfully pushed to the side you tried to remove your hand from it, only to feel their fingers dig into your skin and your hand unable to move. Whatever, you didn't mind holding hands with them the warmth felt nice and made your heart race, albeit that was a bit distracting.
Aha had leaned away from you a bit, their red lips quivering as they held in a laugh before breaking into full out giggles. "Ahaha, you're so forward Y/N," Their eyes flickered over to you, "If you wanted to sleep with me you could've just said so?" They teased you.
You paused at their words, that... being with an Aeon were you worthy of that? Could anyone be worthy of that? Fantasizing was one thing but... if you were given the chance... your head was getting too muddled with thoughts of this. Aha was just joking anyway but if there was an Aeon that would be up to sleeping with a human for fun then... it would probably be Aha wouldn't it?
"What did you mean earlier when you said you were here to help me?" You asked changing the topic and averting your eyes from them. You tried to pull your hand away again but it stuck to Aha's. Your head shot up, "Did you glue our hands together?!"
Aha laughed, staring down at you, "I was going to be your wingman for an Aeon but--"
"Really?!" You perked up immediately throwing your other arm around Aha's back and holding him closer. You didn't bother moving your glued hand and instead kept it in Aha's grasp. "That'd really be amazing!" It was no wonder Aha would find entertainment from trying to set a normal human up with an Aeon.
You'd read that he once picked up a random worm and made it incredibly intelligent to try and grab the attention of Nous. When it failed he discarded the worm without a second thought. It was weird to think you were on the same level as a worm but hey, it gave you a chance to maybe meet another Aeon. You stared at Aha's face, noticing the slightly furrowed sharp eyebrows and their eyes cast downward. You wondered if they'd show you their Aeon form one day?
Either way they seemed a bit upset right now? Annoyed? Perhaps they were just holding in their laugh super hard right now. You deemed that it was probably the latter as a smile overtook their face.
"Of course! " They grinned letting out a small giggle and holding up their entwined hand with yours, and dashing behind you, "I'm so sad! You're over me already!" You knew it was a joke but for some reason you felt a great feeling of heartbreak come over you. You felt like falling to your knees but you stood still anyway feeling one of Aha's arms circle around your neck.
You smiled despite the discomfort, "Well every Aeon is beyond interesting. It'd be nice to meet..." You felt like you were choking, "another one. Obviously, I don't imagine anything beyond meeting them," You admitted feeling your insecurity well up.
Aha laughed wildly and for once you felt on edge around them. You had been acting rather foolishly recently, trusting an Aeon especially one with such chaotic goals, you should be more wary.
"You want to see an Aeon's true form?" Aha asked you, and you could feel their breath on your ear.
Interesting if this was a body they made then they'd gotten the heat aspect down completely, from the warmth of their body to the heat of their breath. You wondered if at any point Aha had been a human. Tayzzyronth had been the last of its species. Nanook was suspected to have come from a planet riddled with destruction and upon seeing the destruction of the aftermath of Tayzzyronth and the Mechanical Empire rose to Aeonhood. But how did the majority of the Aeons start? What were they? Who was Aha before they were an Aeon?
"Wait," You froze finally registering Aha's question, "I... could see an Aeon's true form?" Your heart beat as fast as a humming bird.
"Do you want to? I think it'll be fun," Aha asked again, you could feel their abdomen shake against you and you realized how poorly this could go depending on what Aha found most entertaining.
You could see an Aeon which wouldn't care for you or even glance at you, like Nous. Or Aha may somehow know where Nanook is, and teleport you to that Aeon and... you'd seen what happened to the trailblazer when they met Nanook in the simulated universe. The trailblazer had been immediately killed. That being said Aha didn't really need your consent and you had an inkling that if you said no, you'd meet an Aeon's true form anyway. Plus, it's not like you weren't curious.
"Of course I do." You barely finished speaking before you felt a sudden amount of joy fill you, ecstasy flooded your senses, and your lips opened by themselves letting laughter escape them. The sudden amount of power distracted you from your inability to breathe.
You were in space. Yet you still felt warm, you felt unbearably happy, and you saw Aha in their human form behind you. They laughed at your expression, "My reveal should be the last!" They chattered on excitedly, "But you wouldn't really be able to be here without any help. So I lended a helping hand!" Their eyes were wide with joy and you felt the urge to pat their head.
So you did. "Thank you." They stared at you a bit stunned for a moment, cheeks with a bit more color than usual despite being in space, but you thought nothing of it as they grabbed onto your shoulders and turned you around.
"Look!" Their voice was quiet and strained, you could hear the smile in their voice.
But all of the warmth you felt quickly disappeared as you stared at the Aeon in front of you. Purple swirls and a black mysterious mass stared back at you for a brief moment. You looked into the abyss and the abyss looked back.
To an extent you'd always known that the world would eventually become nothing. That everything you worked toward, no matter how long it benefitted humanity, would eventually disappear with humanity itself. That the planets themselves would fall apart inevitably being swallowed by blackholes which would become nothing themselves. That one day even the fundamental parts of the universe would cease to exist.
That the nothingness you couldn't comprehend would one day be all there is.
You couldn't even sob. The fear that had existed in your body initially had turned into numbness, not numbness it turned into nothingness. You weren't afraid. You weren't anything. It was just
There was something holding you back. A faint warmth coming from your hand, which you found unable to move. You were stuck to something. Aha! You let yourself laugh, your mouth didn't move nor did any sound come out. It didn't feel as if you had a mouth or any form of a body but you did.
You knew one day everything you did would amount to nothing. That's why everything you did wasn't focused on the future. It was enough to enjoy the moment, and tomorrow. You'd had the opportunity to meet such a wonderful Aeon after all. You stared at the black and purple cosmos in front of you, the eyes on it no longer glancing your way. You no longer felt enthralled with joy or burdened with despair but rather, you felt like you.
Your life was insignificant in the grand scheme of things. That was exactly why you could enjoy in the beauty of what was insignificant. Of the flowers in Spring, of the creations in the simulated universe, of the people around you.
"How beautiful," Your voice came out soft as you gazed upon the lonely being. You smiled feeling a fire rise within you. No wonder there was a whole faction dedicated to making such a magnificent creature see the purpose in existing.
Aha laughed, "I'm surprised you didn't fall to nihility! Three cheers for Y/N!" The glue between your hand and theirs seemed to have faded away, as they brought their hands up to clap and cheer out your name.
"I don't know, you sound a bit disappointed," You watched IX disappear from your sight wistfully and then turned to Aha with a smile resting on your face.
Aha held a hand to their chest in offense as they gasped, "I am! You're so mean! Acting like IX is that interesting when we both know I'm ten times more cool!"
You flicked their forehead, "Let's head back to Herta's space station now." Aha laughed, finding amusement in the smallest of actions and the two of you returned.
You managed to find your way back to the topic of IX again. Aha, being an Aeon, had never felt the nothingness from IX and had asked you to describe it.
You went into as much detail as you could and then spoke in a serious tone, "I'm surprised I made it. I knew everything does eventually become nothing, and I knew it isn't nothing right now. I knew that it's less about the meaning of our existence and life and more about the meaning of every day. But the sensation of becoming nothing is... indescribable."
You paused trying to analyze the feeling you'd come across, "For a creature that doesn't know much or one whose only purpose is to live seeing the Nihility would be fatal. But humans... are beyond that. We still live but there are things we treasure above living and even the future of the whole universe." Your Aeon merch being one of them, "Even if one day those things were to disappear with everything else, it's enough for us to have had them in our lifetime. Maybe to an extent a permanent short sightedness is needed."
What you'd experience who can never be explained by any words, the absolute dread and despair. No matter how hard you tried to describe the sensation of nothingness to Aha you couldn't find the words. But you knew now how feeling nothing was worse than even feeling pain. Because from experiencing pain the pleasure and joy you later experienced became more defined and recognizable. You can only rise as high as the lowest you fall.
The good makes the bad worse and the bad makes the good better. They work in tandem. Even if the end result was nothingness for all of the time in between you still wanted to feel and you couldn't get rid of that innate want. Still your whole body trembled as you felt a smile rise to your face-- IX-- IX was just way too cool!
You turned to Aha, grabbing them and hugging them, "Aha! Thank you so much!" You grinned, you didn't want to tell them that their hand had been what brought you out of IX's trance, you wanted to keep that knowledge to yourself, "This may be the best day of my life yet!"
IX was a being withholding so much pain and despair, a creature just waiting for the end. But there was so much more than just the end. When reading a story, sometimes you know the two main characters will die that doesn't mean it isn't worth reading. And of course you wanted to show IX all there was.
Aha looked at you for a moment, face blank and speechless before hugging you back and erupting into laughter. You twirled the Aeon's human form around before letting go and began to ponder.
"Now I wonder... would it be possible for IX to take a human form?"
It would be difficult to bring the Aeon the beauties and wonders of life, as well as the pains considering they were just floating in the sky. It'd be easier if you could bring the Aeon around, but even if they did have a human form you weren't sure you'd be able to drag them around anyway. Even after surviving the encounter you got the feeling your emotions and will to live would numb around them if you spent a long time with them. You'd just have to get stronger first!
Okay writing the emotions IX gives you is a toughie DAMN don't know how I'm going to make the romance work out but I'm sure future me will work something out
I love you future me!!! :) <333 can't wait to romance IX show me what u got!!!
also when i wrote this line "When reading a story, sometimes you know the two main characters will die that doesn't mean it isn't worth reading." i went into one story knowing the two characters both died at the end by driving off a cliff and i still cried despite rarely crying, it was only 6 chapters and one of the best webcomics i've ever read to this day. so fucking worth it
i dont fucking know what powers Aeons have but i'm pretty sure super speed and shit is one of them cause in SU Qlipoth just like appeared at the beginning cus they thought Trailblazer was Akivili and if that creature can like teleport or do super speed fuck it everyone can.
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#pickle pontificates#girl help is the lilyorcharddungeonmeshi video gonna be what finally drives me to make a video essay now that school's over#or am i just gonna watch it and rant to my sister and then forget about it as usual#OR am i gonna decide to be normal and not watch things i know are gonna make me mad#i barely know anything about The Discourse surrounding her and i do not care#i just know i saw the steven universe video and another one awhile back and i kept watching because i was hoping in good faith#that there would be A Point#but there never was#it's just a really weird anger and vitriol and attempt to justify not liking something by arguing that it's bad#and a stubborn insistence on analyzing the separate parts of a thing without even attempting to see whether there's anything#in how the parts fit together. like that's media analysis 101. you see what's there. you see how it fits together. you interpret it#you turn it around and play with the interpretations#you try to figure out what the author was trying to convey and then you look at what you got out of it and what others got out of it#you acknowledge that stuff can be good and you can still hate it. or you acknowledge that stuff can be bad and you can still like it#and you acknowledge that sometimes stuff is just neutral and may have different effects on different people#not just ''raaaaaagh this character did bad things and is therefore bad and irredeemable and there is no other option''#newsflash babe. most characters are like that#and like. i acknowledge that there may be ragebait at play here#but i do like engaging with weirdo opinions sometimes because it gives me a chance to articulate my own feelings and investigate why#i feel that way#but i do have to be careful to make sure i'm not just getting off on being mad and falling down the hole for no reason so. we'll see#edit: i remember what it was now it was the writing tips video#it's the weird black and white there's only one way to do art and i'm right about it all the time attitude
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todayisafridaynight · 2 years
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thinkin back to the rggo story where mine saves daigo after he gets kidnapped because daigo thought kiryu was in danger and mine immediately scolds him for acting recklessly and daigo’s just ‘no one’s ever stood up to me before aside from kashiwagi’ and how that calls back to daigo’s Y0 substory where kiryu tells him only true friends will stand up to him and put him in his place and im--
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#snap chats#'i'm going to be normal' WELL I WAS LYING. LIKE A LIAR. WHO LIES.#ill go in my kitchen in a sec im just. I'm Just.#*gross sobbing*#rgg really made up for Y3's Everything by giving the rggo stories and im so serious about this#people I Am Also A Part Of People complained about not being able to see mine and daigo together much and see their friendship#and.... the rggo stories..... bro theyve been fueling me for months..... im so ill......#BUT SERIOUSLY THOUGH THATS WHY I GET INSANE OVER DAIGO'S Y0 SUBSTORY TOO#like daigo just wanted- NEEDED real friends who would ACTUALLY be there for him for him#not for his status or money or any of that superficial shit#it genuinely makes me happy how dedicated mine is to daigo like No Shit but it's just. *crying*#i love how mine does tell daigo when he fucks up though i love that so much#like mine's such a funny character... he's so cynical yet when he gets the chance to pour his heart out he does#he meant it when he said he didn't take sharing a cup lightly and /i/ want to eat a cup because of it#THIS IS THE SAME SUBSTORY WHERE MINE BUYS A STOCK IN EVERY TAXI COMPANY LIKE DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN#ALL OF THAT JUST TO BE ABLE TO FIND DAIGO#dear god dont get me started on the hamazaki/mine rggo story. oh my god it's THAT but 10 billion i'm going to throw up#i'm just. i HAVE to go into my kitchen or i'll end up typing another essay jesus CHRIST#LIKE AGAIN I FEEL LIKE IM NOT SAYING WHAT I WANT OR GETTING MY POINT ACROSS BUT AAAA#i just need everyone to know i AM still ill over them i just havent had time or many ideas to sit and draw/write something
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tofixtheshadows · 16 days
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I've been thinking a lot lately about how Kabru deprives himself.
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Kabru as a character is intertwined with the idea that sometimes we have to sacrifice the needs of the few for the good of the many. He ultimately subverts this first by sabotaging the Canaries and then by letting Laios go, but in practice he's already been living a life of self-sacrifice.
Saving people, and learning the secrets of the dungeons to seal them, are what's important. Not his own comforts. Not his own desires. He forces them down until he doesn't know they're there, until one of them has to come spilling out during the confession in chapter 76.
Specifically, I think it's very significant, in a story about food and all that it entails, that Kabru is rarely shown eating. He's the deuteragonist of Dungeon Meshi, the cooking manga, but while meals are the anchoring points of Laios's journey, given loving focus, for Kabru, they're ... not.
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I'm sure he eats during dungeon expeditions, in the routine way that adventurers must when they sit down to camp. But on the surface, you get the idea that Kabru spends most of his time doing his self-assigned dungeon-related tasks: meeting with people, studying them, putting together that evidence board, researching the dungeon, god knows what else. Feeding himself is secondary.
He's introduced during a meal, eating at a restaurant, just to set up the contrast between his party and Laios's. And it's the last normal meal we see him eating until the communal ending feast (if you consider Falin's dragon parts normal).
First, we get this:
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Kabru's response here is such a non-answer, it strongly implies to me that he wasn't thinking about it until Rin brought it up. That he might not even be feeling the hunger signals that he logically knew he should.
They sit down to eat, but Kabru is never drawn reaching for food or eating it like the rest of his party. He only drinks.
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It's possible this means nothing, that we can just assume he's putting food in his mouth off-panel, but again, this entire manga is about food. Cooking it, eating it, appreciating it, taking pleasure in it, grounding yourself in the necessary routine of it and affirming your right to live by consuming it. It's given such a huge focus.
We don't see him eat again until the harpy egg.
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What a significant question for the protagonist to ask his foil in this story about eating! Aren't you hungry? Aren't you, Kabru?
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He was revived only minutes ago after a violent encounter. And then he chokes down food that causes him further harm by triggering him, all because he's so determined to stay in Laios's good graces.
In his flashback, we see Milsiril trying to spoon-feed young Kabru cake that we know he doesn't like. He doesn't want to eat: he wants to be training.
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Then with Mithrun, we see him eating the least-monstery monster food he can get his hands on, for the sake of survival- walking mushroom, barometz, an egg. The barometz is his first chance to make something like an a real meal, and he actually seems excited about it because he wants to replicate a lamb dish his mother used to make him!
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...but he doesn't get to enjoy it like he wanted to.
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Then, when all the Canaries are eating field rations ... Kabru still isn't shown eating. He's only shown giving food to Mithrun.
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And of course the next time he eats is the bavarois, which for his sake is at least plant based ... but he still has to use a coping mechanism to get through it.
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I don't think Kabru does this all on purpose. I think Kui does this all on purpose. Kabru's Post Traumatic Stress Disorder should be understood as informing his character just as much as Laios's autism informs his. It's another way that Kabru and Laios act as foils: where Laios takes pleasure in meals and approaches food with the excitement of discovery, Kabru's experiences with eating are tainted by his trauma. Laios indulges; Kabru denies himself. Laios is shown enjoying food, Kabru is shown struggling with it.
And I can very easily imagine a reason why Kabru might have a subconscious aversion towards eating.
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Meals are the privilege of the living.
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emptyjunior · 9 months
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Enough random notes that have a written story on them as environmental storytelling, explore the space, get crazier with it.
You move into a house and aw cute, it has the kids height on the walls but you notice there's a three foot difference in height between measurements, you check the date, they're a month apart. The final measurement is on the ceiling. It's dated two days ago.
You're part of a recovery team that have finally found a stranded ship, they were found too late and have all passed a long time ago. They all died of starvation. You enter their storeroom, it's filled with food. In the dining hall you find the tables laden with perfectly fine looking breads, cakes, cured meats, jams, candies. Your medic says all the people sitting at the table didn't eat a Thing.
You wake up in an apocalypse. You can't find anyone at all as you wander the streets but you do hear faint music playing from somewhere. You stumble into a supermarket, to see all the aisles still full, except for the shelf that was full of ear plugs, which look to be the only thing that was looted.
Like there's light, sound, props. Having a street where every house is decimated except for One. Landing on a planet known for having No Water and a plant is growing and you don't know where it could have possibly gotten moisture from but you can't find the citizens Anywhere.
I'm sorry, I'm just kinda over the "graffiti on the wall to show the bad guy is around". That's not environmental storytelling that's just normal story. Show me I'm in the villains territory by the rain suddenly cutting out above me as I'm driving, even though it's meant to be raining all night. I park the car and step out, and realise the constellations are Wrong, until I see they're Not constellations, they're the blinking lights of a massive ship-
I Will stop now because everytime I go to write a sentence it devolves into another prompt but I'm just saying we have a Lot of senses, engage them, show me the Environment in environmental storytelling.
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insanechayne · 3 months
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~ ~ ~
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kentopedia · 4 months
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nanami kento, who hates dating, and didn’t do much of it in his early twenties. but now, he’s almost thirty, watching all the people he works with settle down, have kids, and he thinks he wants that. so he might as well try.
so satoru sets him up on a few dates — friends of friends, he calls them. and at the end of every one of the dinners, kento goes home empty, exhausted, because he knows what they want is not the same.
still; he thinks maybe he’s being a little self-destructive, maybe too picky, maybe he just got so used to being alone. with satoru’s insistence, he gives all the women another call, invites them over to his apartment.
the first time was a disaster… kento had barely set the dinner on the table before his cat had hissed at her, scratched her down the arm in a thin gash. and though it did draw blood, it was hardly enough to warrant that reaction.
he didn’t even try to stop her as she picked up her bag and left, huffing like she’d been morally offend. kento, though, could only smile to himself in amusement.
because maybe kento was a poor judge of character, a man who was secretly hoping nothing would pan out — but his cat could certainly tell the good from the bad.
it became a little game to him, after that. seeing if anyone could win his pet over, and if they could, perhaps they were the one. his darling animal was a fickle thing anyway. a bit too defensive, quick to bite anything threatening after years on the streets.
naturally, no one came back twice.
he was close to giving up, accepting his solitude because he was tired of empty conversations over dinner. but then, he ventured out over the weekend to a new coffee shop, during hours he normally didn’t spend out of his home, and met you.
though you only talked for a moment, kento felt like maybe he’d known you in a past life. a part of him thought maybe it was strange, the way he kept coming back to talk to you, catching you at the end of your shift to see if you wanted to grab a coffee sometime.
by the second date, kento started to think you could turn out to be his best friend.
by the third date, kento wondered if soulmates were real.
on the fourth date, almost two months later, an appropriate time to get to know someone when you were as reserved as kento, he invited you over for dinner. it was, perhaps, the final confirmation he needed to let himself be with you.
he let you through the door, smiling softly as you told him about the book you were reading, and hung his coat on the rack. a moment later, you stopped, distracted, hands covering your mouth in a gasp.
“kento! she’s the cutest cat i’ve ever seen, you didn’t even show me pictures!” you exclaim, and, a few feet away, crouched down. “look at her pretty eyes…”
“careful,” kento said, “she’s not very—“
but the cat approached your outstretched hand, sniffed once, before letting you scratch her under her chin, purring loud enough for kento to hear across the room.
“shes such a sweetheart, you told me she was mean!” you smiled, making a cooing noise as you threaded your fingers through her fur. “kento’s a liar, isn’t he… you’re so precious.”
a few moments later, she snapped her jaw at you in a biting motion, and you only laughed, withdrawing your hand. “alright, i get it, i won’t bother you anymore.”
though she still brushed against your legs, just as she did kento’s, and seemed to communicate some sort of message to him.
“do you want any help cooking?” you ask, tucking your hair behind your ears. “i’m a disaster in the kitchen, but—“
“sure,” kento said, his chest tightening as he blinked back at you, only in his apartment for minutes and already looking as at home there. he wondered if it was possible to fall in love so quickly. “but only if you want to.”
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jackriverart · 10 months
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So the other day, my 6 yo son was playing with blocks or something, and I heard him say:
"These are two girls, and they're in love, and they live in this café"
And that's just the cutest most beautiful sapphic shit I've ever heard
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fxllfaiiry · 11 months
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─ you're the sunflower ੈ✩‧₊˚
✶ pairing: miguel o'hara x fem!reader
✶ synopsis: everyone on the team loves you, expect miguel who seems to hate you more than anyone.
✶ warnings: angst!! major angst. sunshine!reader x grumpy!miguel. reader is nicknamed sunflower, mentions of death.
✶ notes: there's one spanish sentence in this, I'm not good with spanish so if I've made a mistake please tell me so i can fix it! part two is already up!!!
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Everyone on the team loved you from the moment you joined, everyone, except Miguel. 
You knew Miguel was cold towards everyone, but he was extra cold with you. Maybe it was because of how different your personalities were. 
You were the embodiment of sunshine, always positive in any situation, putting others before yourself. Hence why everyone calls you sunflower, it fits perfectly, Miles was proud of coming up with it. 
Miguel on the other hand was cold and distant but that didn't stop you from trying to get him to open up. You'd try to have simple conversations with him but nothing, all you would receive in reply was an eye roll or a slight grunt, but you wouldn't give up that easily. 
Like today, you got him some coffee. 
"Morning, boss. Got you some coffee." You said in your usual cheerful tone. 
"Why?" He raised his eyebrows, looking down at you suspiciously. That's the most he's said to you all week. 
"Because I wanted to." You shrugged, placing it down on his desk. 
He steped down walking towards his desk, you couldn't help but stare at him, unfortunately for you, everything about him was so attractive, it's such a shame he hated you. 
"This isn't how I like my coffee." 
"Huh?" You snapped out of your daydream at the sound of his voice. 
"The coffee, it tastes terrible. Get it from another place next time." 
"Well, actually I made it-" But he had already walked away from you not listening to a word you said. "Alright, never mind, I'll just go back to work." You mumbled hurt by his words. 
"Wait, hold on." You looked up, thinking, maybe he'll say something nice after all. 
"Yeah?" 
"Take the coffee with you, I won't be drinking it." 
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
"Girl, why do you look so sad? Did Miguel do something again?" Jess asked with a frown, she did not like seeing you sad. 
"No."
"Sunflower…"
"Okay, yes." Miguel being cold towards you was normal, he never spoke to you unless necessary. Out of everyone here, he probably hated you the most, even more than Miles.  
"Sunflower, I've told you to stop trying." Jess sighed. 
"I know, I know… why does he hate me so much, Jess?" 
"That's just the way he is, don't overthink it. It's his loss, baby." She replied, gently patting your shoulder. 
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Today was going to be a good day, you were so sure of it. 
But, of course, you were wrong. 
Everything was going great up until a few hours ago. 
Miguel had assigned you on a mission to catch an anomaly, alongside a few other spider-people. His instructions were clear, stick to the plan and catch the anomaly. It was supposed to be simple. 
If only you didn't disobey him. You screwed up badly, and because of that, you could have been killed. 
"Why don't you ever listen?" Miguel shouted. No one had ever seen him this angry. 
"I was just tryin-" 
"¡Ay, por el amor de Dios!" Being yelled at by your boss in front of your coworkers was humiliating, everyone was looking at you with pity. 
"I'm sick of this, why can’t you follow simple instructions? Is it that hard to understand?" He barked, towering over you. 
"It's not a big deal." You tried to keep your composure, you didn't want to humiliate yourself further by bursting into tears. 
"Not a big deal? You could've died! A simple mistake would have ruined the whole mission." 
Don't cry. Don't cry. 
"But we're all fine, aren't we?" You weakly chuckled. That was the wrong thing to say because it only made him angrier. 
"Oh? If that's the attitude you have then you shouldn't even be on the team." Ouch. 
"Miguel, I think that's enough-" Hobie said, quickly jumping in. 
"Not now, Hobie." He growled. 
Never once did you think that you'd be in a situation like this. 
"If you put more focus on trying to be good at your job, rather than impressing me, we wouldn't even be here!" Oh, so he did notice that. 
At this point, tears were streaming freely down your face and you made no attempt to stop them. 
"Yep, you got it, boss." You smiled up at him through your tears. It was pathetic, but you did not care, you just wanted to leave and never come back. 
"Next time make sure this doesn't happen." 
"It won't happen next time." That's because there won't be a next time.
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