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pinchinschlimbah · 2 months

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On "Coming Out" and Noel Fielding

I mentioned forever ago that I had this post in mind and then never got around to it, but now with the new interview quote I was yelling about recently it feels like a particularly good time to get it out of my brain and onto the page! tl;dr: musings on the concept of "coming out" as it has evolved over time, whether it's something that should continue to be necessary or expected of queer people, and why Noel is particularly inspirational to me in that regard since this is, after all, my brainrot blog. This may be extremely long and a bit disjointed but I hope some of y'all will enjoy it!

So a while ago myself and several friends were discussing the concept of coming out. All of us are some flavor of queer both in gender and orientation, but each is in a different place along their self discovery and identity journey, with some being long since out and proud, and others just starting to dip their toes into exploration past the expected cishet.

This discussion actually was prompted by a different discussion about Noel, spurred by comments we'd come across slamming him as being homophobic/transphobic on Bakeoff for making comments suggesting he has romantic or sexual attraction towards Paul, referring to himself with female-centric terms, playing female characters in the skits, and a particular moment where he brings up Old Gregg while talking to KimJoy and says "he was a sea transsexual....quite a demanding role for me" while laughing to indicate that that last part was said in jest. Hey fellas, is it homophobic/transphobic to be a little bit gay and trans? This got us talking about how the current culture of queer identity has evolved to the point where "coming out" feels more like something the public feels they're owed in order for them to view one's expression as valid, rather than its original purpose as something one does for themself in order to live most authentically. I don't think I need to go into detail about how many artists have been harassed by their "fans" into coming out before they were ready because people wouldn't accept the validity of that person's work without knowing exactly how that person identified, there've been plenty of articles and video essays and better written tumblr posts about that, but it's definitely a concerning trend. It can be particularly dangerous when it comes to people who aren't feeling confident or safe enough to come out, who end up being criticized and shunned by the queer community as being somehow problematic for not being able to fully articulate to a group of strangers the ways in which they're experiencing their identity. In this situation, the people who are struggling the most end up with the least support. Forcing people to either declare an identity or get out just leads to more people staying closeted out of fear of doing it "wrong" and never getting the chance to explore the most authentic and joyful versions of themselves, or even worse, feeling the need to out themselves before they're in a safe place to do so and suffering the resulting consequences. Questioning or cautious people deserve space in the community to experiment even if they haven't yet or maybe never will come out! My high school's Gay Straight Alliance was comprised entirely of "straight allies" when I was there. There was not a single "out" person in the school at the time. Nearly all of us in the GSA ended up being some flavor of queer or trans years later after graduation. But whether it was intentional closeting or just feeling an innate affinity towards something we couldn't quite pinpoint at the time, we all knew we belonged there and made that space for ourselves and others like us. Back when "coming out" first became a concept in the public consciousness, it was during a time where cishet identity was not just considered the default, but the only option. By coming out, queer people were giving genuinely revolutionary representation for themselves and others like them by telling the world that, as the old saying goes, we're here, we're queer, get used to it! Nowadays, we're lucky to live in a culture that is much more cognizant of queer identities being a thing, so in many cases coming out has become less about having to explain to those around you the basic concept of queerness existing, and moreso about which specific identity you fall under, and that's where things get messy.

My friends and I shared our own thoughts and experiences. One is currently identifying as "unlabeled" because they haven't found a term that feels correct yet, and therefore hasn't come out because they wouldn't know what to say. One spoke about how when they first came out they were much more insistent on what terms or pronouns people used for them but as time has gone on they've grown to find joy in being inscrutable and letting others wonder what they're perceiving. One expressed that given the state of the world they've been retreating somewhat back into the closet for safety reasons rather than being super outward with their queerness like they used to and is working on learning to embrace those parts of themself again. One said they felt like they'd already been existing as queer and expressing that queerness "before I even had the terms to come out to myself" and is now working on catching up on the conscious end of figuring out what's what. I myself never really had an official "coming out", I just became increasingly visually/socially/vocally queer as I became more and more confident in who I was and what I wanted to be and who I had on some level always been, and decided if people didn't get the hint that's their own problem. I came into consciousness of my queerness during the early 2010s original tumblr MOGAI microlabel boom, where there was a ton of focus on figuring out the hyper specific identity labels that exactly described what you were experiencing. I did a lot of digging and soul searching and experienced a lot of unnecessary stress trying and failing to find my perfect labels and landed on clumsy terms like "full time drag queen" because it was the closest I could get to what I was feeling about my gender, only to be told it was problematic for me to call myself that as an AFAB person because drag "belongs to cis gay men" (don't get me started on that statement, that's a whole other essay lol) It was a real wake up call once I distanced from these aggressively labeled and segmented online spaces and made my way into real world queer communities where I was relieved to find that in fact no one there asks to check your membership card before letting you in, if you feel like you belong there you're welcome no questions asked.

I had other people in these communities referring to me as "queer" and "fag" and "gay" and "queen" before I felt comfortable doing so myself based on online Discourse I'd experienced over who is Allowed to use certain terms, and having these community leaders I respected recognizing those things in me and welcoming me in like that gave me the confidence to really find my own footing in ways that attempting to find my exact correct identity label so that I could officially proclaim it never did. Once I could answer the question of what I was with a shrug and "queer I guess!" things became so much easier. Microlabels can be incredibly helpful and liberating for some, don't get me wrong if it works for you that's great, but let's not pretend that everyone is going to have the same experiences.

So anyway, back to Noel. Noel has never, to my knowledge, ever had any sort of official “coming out” or explicitly referred to himself as queer. So I know there are people out there who will disagree with me considering him to be queer. But so much of what he’s said and done throughout his several decades long career has indicated to me that this is clearly someone of queer experience navigating the world as such, and just as the queers in my local community welcomed me as one of them before I knew to do it myself, I extend that welcome forward.

Let’s take a look at some of the facts. In the public span of his career, Noel has.....(in no particular order, also if anyone wants to add additional instances of note in the reblogs or comments please feel free, this is by no means a fully comprehensive list) -repeatedly called himself "the woman of the Boosh" or Julian's/Howard's "wife" in ways that suggest that's how he actually felt about it rather than it just being a punchline that he was mistaken for female in the show [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] -referred to himself at the GQ "Man of the Year" awards as "never been a man" and "a sort of girl, he/she" -been referred to by Sandi Toksvig as being "on the cusp" in regards to gender, to which he reacts with amusement and acceptance -consistently expressed excitement and appreciation when others refer to him with feminine terms or say he looks like a girl [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] -said "I love being a man-woman, it's much more interesting than being one or the other" and expressed that the loved shooting the Boosh Electro episode for this reason -referred to Vince Noir (a character who he's been pretty open about being based on himself) as "wasn't seemingly one gender or the other" -expressed that he felt most free and happy when presenting femininely [2] -had Julian, one of the people closest to him, express that Noel and Sandi (an out lesbian) may have "real sexual chemistry" because Noel is "all over the shop, he's a different sex" -used the "Confuser" line of "Is it a boy? Is it a girl? I'm not sure I mind" to refer to himself rather than Vince, and express that he's had to work to find new ways to feel as androgynous as he'd like now that he's older -referred to himself as a lesbian [2] -said that he "sometimes looks in the mirror and sees a woman", in the same interview that Julian implies that Noel is in fact a girl -referred to himself as a "girl/boy" -consistently referred to himself with feminine terms on panel shows and bakeoff -made a joke on bakeoff about not being a testosterone-based person -responded positively when asked about the ways Boosh had influenced queer and nonbinary youth -has said he's "quite obsessed with the man/woman mixup thing" -has said if he was an animal he'd want to be a seahorse because the males get pregnant -Had Lee Mack, who Noel used to live with, refer to him as "the little transsexual one, yeah I think she's fantastic" in a Boosh documentary and "a young lady who came out here happy to be herself" in response to Noel's Wuthering Heights drag performance -had his own mother refer to him as "the daughter I always wanted" -described his own appearance as that of a "transsexual witch" and when an interviewer attempted to make fun of him for calling himself "a transgender witch" by showing Noel a drawing the interviewer clearly found repulsive, Noel responded that the interviewer was "holding up a mirror" and called the image his passport photo

And I'm not even going to bother citing sources on the countless times he's made comments suggesting romantic or sexual attraction towards men. Literally just watch any non-character appearance he's ever done, it's kind of his whole thing??? Not to mention his penchant for picking up explicitly queer and gnc character roles, and also just [gestures vaguely to everything Noel and Julian have said about each other suggesting romantic and sexual tension between them and how they used their characters as an excuse to explore those feelings in a less scary way, again that could be a whole other essay on its own but ooh boy] I also think there's something interesting to explore in the idea of Noel repeatedly referring to his appearance as transgender or transsexual rather than identifying himself as such- at what point does the appearance of something become reality?

It all begs the question- is it even a joke anymore if it's that consistent? Either it's not a joke and it's an authentic expression of his real feelings and experiences, or he for some reason really really wants everyone to believe that he's queer when he's not, with this behavior spanning back to a time before the concept of queerbaiting was on anyone's minds and when being publicly queer could mean the end of your career. Which scenario do you think is more likely? And, does someone who’s been conducting themself like this for their entire career really NEED to come out? Honestly, I find this level of simultaneous authenticity and inscrutability aspirational.

In this Velvet Onion interview from 2012, Noel compares his penchant for dresses to both Grayson Perry and Eddie Izzard. This is interesting because those two people represent pretty opposite intentions behind their presentation- Grayson identifies solidly as cis male, and for him the shock value of crossdressing is the point, saying “I signed up for a gender and I want them to be very clearly delineated so I know I’m dressing up in the wrong clothes.” This doesn't seem particularly in line with where Noel is coming from given him famously referring to himself as "the Confuser" and stating in that same Velvet Onion interview that he "never even bothered giving it a label, I never went oh I'm a transvestite, I just went yeah if I fancy wearing a dress I do, never really thought about it really" Eddie on the other hand has famously said "They're not women's clothes. They're my clothes, I bought them." indicating that they were a genuine part of her authentic expression rather than a crossdressing costume, and has subsequently over the years identified more and more solidly as transfemme. I find Eddie's trajectory particularly fascinating because it's been so non-linear. In the 90s when the language for transness was much less public knowledge, she referred to herself consistently as a transvestite- a cishet man who enjoyed dressing as a woman, as well as using terms like "male tomboy" and "male lesbian" and "a full boy plus extra girl". Despite doing most of her standup shows in femme looks, most of her acting jobs were male-presenting, and there was a period of time in the 2010s where she dropped the femme presentation entirely in an attempt to be taken more seriously as the "crossdressing" was seen by many as a gimmick. Swinging back around more recently, Eddie has been explicitly identifying as genderfluid and transfemme, and in recent years has made the decision to "be based in girl mode from now on", and use primarily she/her pronouns. Since this announcement, in her trans advocacy work Eddie has described herself as being "out" as trans since the 1980s despite all of the above. She always knew who she was, it's just she's gotten access to more accurate terms over time to describe what she was experiencing, as well as feeling more safe to do so the more that transness became a known and accepted concept in the public eye.

The interview I mentioned at the very start of this post isn't really a coming out from Noel. And I don't think we'll ever really get one from him. In my opinion Noel has spent the past several decades conducting himself as someone who is in fact already out- it’s pretty clear Noel knows and is proud of who he is regardless of how he chooses to describe that identity. At this point, making some sort of official statement would just be for the benefit of others looking for clarification on their own perception of him and people who want to be able to put him in one box or another, and that’s not what coming out should be. The statement in the new interview is not "I am genderfluid", its "I've always been genderfluid", simply putting an accurate name to what's always been publicly visibly true now that he's got the terms to do so.

#noel fielding #gender files #gender files masterpost #gay yelling #the mighty boosh #shouts into void #a lot of this could also apply to my other wife #but that discussion is way more of a minefield so I'm not touching that for now plus many more people already have

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boonoonoonus · 11 months

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People only care about House Velaryon as much as it pertains to creating this upotian idea of racial neutrality. However, when you press to say the optics of whiteness perpetuating a form of ethnic cleansing in the House, everyone is blind. They can't see that, and the reason is because whiteness can never see itself as anything but ulturistic. People cannot comprehend, nor can they write anything that treats non-white characters as people with their own motivations, beliefs, and sense of morality because then they'd have to stop using them as tools. Laenor Velaryon is used in this way in fandom to prop up the Targaryens narrative concerning white supremacy, colonisation, and classism. It's ludicrous that's there is no fanfiction or meta or anything interrogating the possibility that House Velaryon could be justified in their dislike of the succession crisis Rhaenyra causes or that Laenor may be upset with her. He is never more than her gay best friend because that is the only role a gay biracial man can play for a white woman.

This is problematic in as much that making a biracial man support someone who is representative of systems of oppression in any which way without critical engagement is dangerous and an oversight. Making House Velaryon black could have been interesting. Instead, it's invited white people on mass to prop up black people as support for their racist fantasies. By that, I mean any writing/headcanon/thought experiment that sees House Velaryon just be Rhaenyra's strongest supporters without explaining why, is just erasure and tokenism. (Sidenote, no one ever gives a why and I think in part it's because media literacy is dead and whiteness has become so ingrained as the standard people cannot fathom why you would never just support the main white character no matter how asinine they are. There is no good argument, and no one wants to do the work to try to create one. Fair enough, no one can demand your labour, but it leave black characters in a sidelined and tokenistic position that supports white people taking them out for brownie points when needed.)

Laenor isn't a person, he's a mesh of plot relevant reactions and external support to make Rhaenyra and the writer by extension look and feel better. Both Laenor and Laena are shown in fanfiction and the TV show to be useful by the very act of their disposal, and no one pauses to wonder if that is a violent act. (It is. It's antiblack and plays into hegemonic violence against black bodies).

Also, the breeding kink of the white supremacist line of thinking shows itself in the way in which people argue the importance of Rhaenyras line continuing by blood, but conveniently saying that the choice to adopt on behalf of House Velaryon is progressive and their blood doesn't matter, choice does. The parallels between this argument and the likes of the Tuskegee experiment or sterilisation of non white persons with vaginas in hospitals and prisons whilst encouraging white people who are capable of giving birth to do so are immense. The willingness of people to fall into white supremacist lines of thinking when arguing for a fictional character is astounding, however its ultimately a pet peeve on my behalf. There are very few critical spaces in which blackness is welcomed in life, and existential alienation extends into the digital and fictional worlds. People are comfortable with prejudice and white supremacy ,it's is the basis on which the West builds legitimacy and precedent, it is not remiss then to say that the inheritors of these social precedents replicate the behaviour and line of thinking.

This is not to say people are unaware, but often the "fun" of whiteness is to be able to not have to worry about the likes of Black, Indigenous, Asian or Pacific islander people because preservation of white happiness is more important. White people get to live in a utopian ideal all the time when it pertains to race and have the freedom to say that discussions on such topics harsh their vibe so they do not have to engage.

But whatever, who cares what I think, I'm just a Black person on the Internet.

#Ryahmidnightmusings

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diedbydeath · 11 months

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new pinned cuz the last one sucked

[pt: new pinned cuz the last one sucked /end pt]

last updated: apr 1, 2024

will change constantly

FREE daily click to help palestine [link]

ask game [link]

making a carrd to replace my intro, hopefully will be out soon

(small tw for swearing and caps)

this is a blog for the whole system to hang out. we’re in the process of getting accounts specific for our members. might start a blog specific for system things but we’re not sure yet.

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if you need to refer to us collectively, use fern.

the only blogs we would like to not interact are nsfw, cringe/flop, and suicide/sh blogs. that’s about it though.

no donation asks, heres why [link]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

stances (will constantly be updating):

• pro blm, #stopasianhate, or any movement related to anti-racism

• we love you anti-racists /pla

• pro #metoo

• we’re an inclu and will support anything that exclus try to exclude (that aren’t problematic in our eyes)

• we’re fine with all good-faith labels except prat ones tbh

• not really a fan of any discourse, but we will partake in it if it’s about something we feel strongly about

• pro researched self dx

• pro acab

• fakeclaiming is a pretty bitchy thing to do

• as long as the slurs you use can be reclaimed by you, we think it’s fine

• anti radqueer and transid

• anti bigotry of all kinds and will brutally murder bigots

• pro furry and therian/otherkin/alterhuman

• pro endo, fuck sysmeds

• we fucking hate conservatives

• CLIMATE. CHANGE. IS. REAL.

• don’t abuse animals

• as long as what you do doesn’t harm people and makes you happy, we’re all for it

• mental health needs more awareness and less stigma

• anti proshitter because we have some harmful paraphilias (anti-c of course) and we don’t like it when people try to normalize that shit

• cluster b disorder abuse doesn’t exist

• anti antitheists (we’re fine with atheists, though, but don’t resort to fucking cultural genocide)

• being tolerant to intolerance is bigotry

• anti KAM (kill all men)

• transandrophobia is real

• pro abortion

• we love non-monoamorous people /pla

• anti-assimilationist all the way

• anti zionist, free palestine

• we stand with ukraine

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

if we say something bigoted or offensive, PLEASE tell us. we want this to be a safe space for anyone who needs it.

byf:

-mainly reblogs, also tend to reblog twice

-we forget to tag swearing and caps a lot

tone tags are appreciated, but we won’t force you to use them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

tag system:

#fern gets personal - my life and shit

#fern’s crush tag - talking about my crush, will be paired with the tag above

#fern irl - irl photos, may or may not use, will be paired with #fern gets personal

#fern’s miscellaneous - miscellaneous stuff

#fern gets serious - serious topics/vents

#fern answers - answering asks

#shut up fern - positive rants (eg. talking about shit i like)

#fern gets angry - negative rants

#fern being gay - just me and the homies being gay lmao

may add more in the future

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

personal accounts for the gang:

@empyreal-collective-main - just the main account, nothing really there

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

other blogs we have (and why we have them):

@that-queer-rants - just for ranting about queer stuff

@jessie-paege-fan-blog - for our daddy, jessie paege

@sick-of-radshits - a blog for ranting about these terrible people (radqueers)

@intershmex - intersex memes

@cute-shonks - cute sharks galore

@non-euphoric-positivity - a place for trans people who don’t experience gender euphoria

@fixing-rq-posts - a blog for fixing prat posts with blackout poetry

@ramblings-of-a-liege - discourse blog

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

anyway, hope you have fun on this blog!

userbox by us

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indigoinka · 7 months

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Hi! I’m finally getting around to that intro post I promised months ago, and honestly, you could be here for some time.

I’m squatting on a whole bunch of social media accounts, but this is the only place I feel safe anymore, though I do have a little reader group on the Meta-hole (🤢). I wish I could get my AuDHD head around Discord, but it feels like the old Yahoo boards mated with a speeding train, and I'm just too tired for that.

Wherever you look, I’ll be indigoinka or Inka York there.

This is me:

About me, then:

I love tea. Would I even be British if I didn’t?

I love cake. British.

And cider. British.

Yeah, and pie.

Food. I like food.

Please rec queer TV shows to me because I don’t watch as much as I should, and sometimes I just need to refill my crusty old well.

I love supporting indie authors, and rarely read trad stuff these days unless the blurb and sample are god tier.

Feel free to ask questions and tag me in writing games, or whatever shenanigans you get up to around here.

What do I write?

I write queer books, mostly urban fantasy, and usually set in the same storyworld. I also write contemporary gay romance, sometimes with an alien twist. And I’m wide with my books, so you can find them at all the major online retailers and in library catalogues.

I write what I like to read, which sometimes includes problematic tropes, but mostly includes wholesome shit like twin stories, sibling banter, ride or die friendships, a hearty mix of fluff and angst, found families, annoying ghosts, salty supernaturals, cinnamon rolls with knives, and sentient vehicles. Oh, and goats. I love me a judgemental goat.

My favourite tropes

Well, it started as a love triangle/square/dodecahedron, but now everybody's fucking (I don't know what this trope is actually called)

Forced proximity/only one bed (or coffin, in my case)

Friends to lovers (AKA idiots who took too long to notice how perfect they are)

Grumpy/Sunshine

Secret twins

Rivals to lovers

Hurt/comfort

My storyworlds

Cascade Apocrypha (queer paranormal/urban fantasy in many subgenres from pirate adventures to cosy mysteries to paranormal romance)

Feverish (contemporary gay romance)

Dracate System (AKA Gay Space Bridgerton)

My books

My first series, Not the Same River, is urban fantasy, upper YA/crossover, set in the Cascade Apocrypha storyworld. It features angels, demons, vamps, vaewolves, goats, succubus nuns, and villains to cry over. Book five is out this month, and the final book is out in February. This is the story of my heart, and the one that spurred a thousand spin-offs that I'll never have time to write.

The first book in that series, A Storm of Paper Starlings, is complete on Wattpad and Inkitt. I was gonna put it on AO3, but it feels weird because I tore all my Potter fics down when JKR started flashing her arse at the entire world, and everything I had on there felt dirty. Anyway, I digress. I might go back. Talk me into it.

I also have two other books updating on Wattpad:

🩷 Victorian Vampire Daddy (MM historical romantic suspense/Cascade Apocrypha)

🩷 My Ex & His Boyfriend (MMM/Feverish storyworld)

My other current series, Tales from the Noctuary (Cascade Apocrypha), has two books out at the retailers:

🩷 Secrets at the Door (historical mystery/suspense with lesbian romance): fat, beekeeping lesbian vampire, queer well-demon with a bad haircut, nonbinary treasure who sometimes makes bad decisions, everybody be gay.

🩷 Puddles in the Pavement (historical mystery and outright shenanigans): queer archangel brother detectives, a perky butler, an escort of indeterminate gender with the worst singing voice in the known world, a vampire duke with terrible table manners, and a Home Secretary with an unasked for appendage (let's hope that doesn't get around).

I have two more books written for this series so far, which will likely debut in my subscription.

Getting to that...

My subscription

13 Club: After Dark is hosted at Ream Stories, the only subscription platform designed specifically for authors and readers, and it is amazing.

You just click on the book cover you want, and the app will drop you into the social e-reader right where you left off, so you can comment right there inside the story. It’s like Patreon + Wattpad + a community board + extra sauce.

Honestly, I could gush about it all week.

This is also me:

So, what’s there?

Well, first, you can follow me there (which is free, obvs) and get access to:

The Weakest Link (Not the Same River #0): features the series MC’s twin sister and the coven she grew up in.

The Cursed Bones of Sergeant Boom!: a contemporary paranormal mystery involving a ghost who gatecrashed a funeral and got followed home by a necromantified corgi (as one does).

Pride’s Treasure: a series of mini adventures with characters from all the stories above, where all the chaos is your fault, because the MC of this story is YOU!

In the paid tiers, there’s 8 weeks early access to the two stories updating on Wattpad, the whole Not the Same River series so far (book 5 is updating now, before it hits the retailers at the end of October 2023). There’s also a 13 Club exclusive story called Earth Render, which is MMMMF (but not reverse harem), again set in the Cascade Apocrypha storyworld. That one features a witch with no beginning, a raven shifter with the best taste in pets, a vampire with memory issues, a vaewolf who can’t control his wolfism, and a nephilim with a huge secret. I promise not to give the Archangel Gabriel a horse penis in this story 👀

There are also physical welcome packs for some of the tiers, and all members are rewarded with After Darkling points, which they can save up each month for sweet treats, like a personalised drabble, or a one-shot featuring their favourite character, or some mystery merch. I love my After Darklings and my little club so much.

My main WIPs at the moment are:

Earth Render serial (mentioned above)

The Dryad's Curse: Pirates of Siorai trilogy (paranormal pirate adventure with romance/Cascade Apocrypha)

Gay Space Bridgerton (space fantasy romance with interplanetary political intrigue and hapless humans/Dracate System)

Almost done... maybe

That was a whole lot of intro (mate, do I love the word shenanigans), but I’m a busy goblin, and though my days are only marginally more comfortable than my painful nights, I still feel grateful that I get to do this every day.

I’d love to chat with you here, on Wattpad, in my FB group (same name as my sub) or over at 13 Club: After Dark. My subscription is what keeps me and my writing going, so if you’re here because you already love my stories, and you have the means, I’d love to see you over there. Your support would mean the world to me, whether it’s a follow or more. I love in-story comments more than life.

I’d love more friends on here, though. So if you’re into queer media and love reading, feel free to follow and I'll follow back.

That’s it from me. I’m finally shutting the fuck up.

Come chat with me whenever you want.

Stay safe!

❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜

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saffronthreads · 10 months

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Ma? Ma there's a weird fuckin' stray cat outside!

Welcome to the selfship sideblog! I'm Saffron and I have a thing for men with long hair who could kill me. I'll also answer to the names Rin and Jack. My main is @signofthestriking and I'll be interacting from that account. More information about me under the cut!

This is an 18+ blog and I ask that minors not follow or interact if at all possible. I won't be mad if you like/reblog a SFW post but still, this ain't the blog for you.

Blinkies.cafe. Also I use the tag #flashing lights for all posts with blinkies.

Little background about me:

While I didn't take part in the community or use this label, I've been quietly self-shipping as long as I can remember being into DBZ. Hell, Trunks was the guy who helped me realize I was both gay and a man. Never talked about it until now, for obvious reasons.

I initially took interest in Raditz as a gag. It's no longer a gag.

You may see older content shipping Raditz with Cain. This was made before I switched my main s/i to from Cain to Saffron. Not meant as an incest thing.

Right now, self-shipping isn't my main priority in terms of creative works. My focus will be on stories like Spectrum-Verse for the time being, a project I'm very passionate about and love working on. However, I hope that by keeping this blog, I'll have an easier time making content about my loves in the future.

I'm cool with sharing f/os as long as you are. The more the merrier.

Click here for more details about my selfships, including the S/I's.

Tags I'll be using:

#ratman simps: general content about my f/os

#ratman after dark: NSFW content

#sfw saffron: I tag all my SFW imagines, and I don't mind if minors happen to interact with these if they see them in passing.

#mad mutt: Content related to Raditz and Saffron

#stone faced droid: Content related to Trunks and Rin

Not really a DNI but to try and cover bases:

"Problematic" fiction (including fanfic) isn't something to boil down into these "pro/anti" sides. While I think the people on both sides have (mostly) good intentions at heart, I cant give my full support to either one.

Have dark fantasies if you want. Write dark fiction if you want. Write dark fanfiction if you really want. Your thoughts don't make you a bad person unless they lead you to do bad things. Understand that these fantasies often come with responsibility, to make sure they don't bring any harm in the real world. Fiction doesn't equal reality, but it takes conscious effort to separate the two.

I'm not saying you can't write fucked up fanfic. But there needs to be a discussion about when and how to write fucked up fanfic with characters that aren't yours.

Mainstream social media isn't a safe place for some of the more extreme "problematic" fiction/fantasies. I understand that sometimes it's the only space, but I think there needs to be better separation. And on that note, fandom ain't the bedroom. Don't treat it like one.

#pinned #flashing lights

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significant-ace-nnoyance · 1 year

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hi ily. for questions, 1, 12, and 24? <333

HI OMG ILY TOO 😭😭 already know this is gonna take me a hot minute because u chose some deep questions but mostly because that’s just a me problem <3333 here we go!!!

what are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are?

dAng okay starting off STRONG hm for positive things i’d say first my middle school friends. my friend group coming out opened to door to my own queerness and created an atmosphere where queerness was the norm and we were able to unapologetically express that. it’s a little nostalgic looking back because since moving schools i’ve definitely had to suppress a ton more and talking about my queerness in any way irl has become sort of taboo for me which is a little sad. but i will forever be grateful for them for introducing that side of the world that i might have taken a long time to meet otherwise and ofc for being such a beautiful support system and lovely people <3 i miss yall second uhhhhhhhhh i’d say omg okay so listen this is gonna sound stupid but i am 100% serious when i say seaweed brain podcast. they not only reintroduced me to percy jackson and showed that it’s okay to still love this fandom when you’ve “outgrown it” (and that led to me re entering a lot of fandoms that used to bring me a ton of joy as a kid) but they’ve also taught me a ton, how to think critically about text you read and topics you hear about, how to love a text and see it’s faults, showed me a ton of new perspectives and taught me a lot of important lessons about like problematic parts of literature or tropes or ideas that as a kid i obviously didn’t catch but are so so important for me to learn about and start unlearned now. and ofc theyve showed me that it’s okay to have different opinions and to change your opinions and to share your opinions and have respectful open fun discourse about them <3 and always such a queer safe space for me before tumblr was in the picture and have let me live vicariously through their rants of how gay the books are with their guests :) so yes i would fr say they have shaped me a lot into the much more informed nerd i am now and help provide a support system and a source of comfort from irl <33 love u erica and carter lol keep slaying and lastly i’d say definitely joining tumblr <3 i first came on here last summer after a therapy session where my therapist was asking about my friends and was like ‘well do u have any online friends’ and i was like no my parents wouldn’t let me and also i wasn’t sure how to even find those friends. and then i remembered about tumblr which i had previously though was like an old app like i didn’t think it still existed 😭😭 and i was like well hm lets see if it’s still there and honestly *winks at camera* it was the best thing that i’d ever done no but seriously i was not doing so hot at that point and the community on tumblr—just the unapologetic joy and curiosity and passion and casual affection and community—it really helped me just to get through the day knowing i had a source of joy at the end of it! and it also gave me a space where i could be myself after a day of masking and conformity and finally god finally have somewhere where i could express things like hyperfixations or simple queer things without apology or criticism and ahhhh it’s helped me love myself so much more and encouraged my curiosity and helped me learn so much through so many resources! and ofc gave me many many lovely ao3 fics :) ily all so so much ty for being the best <3 tumblr for the win

12. what’s some good advice you want to share?

probably something i think a lot more people need to hear is that no one fits into a box. humans exist on a spectrum in pretty much every dimension of our life and trying to limit yourself to just one point on that spectrum erases so much of the beauty and potential and magnitude of just living as yourself. even though society might tell you that you’ll only be accepted if you look, dress, talk, act, believe, grow up, love, experience the world in one way, they’re lying. those are systems of oppression that have hundreds of thousands of forever of years integrating in our institutions and so yes they will make it hard for you to exist as you are no matter what. but they are nothing compared to the true complexity and nuance of being human. they cannot define you—literally no one can define you except yourself. and that’s another thing: it’s okay to be wrong about that definition. the journey of self discovery and throwing off the labels society has placed on you since birth is not. easy. but it doesn’t have to be, and it will never look the same for anyone, and you will probably make interpretations about how you fit into the world that you will disagree with later on! but the important thing is to find people who care about you and support you and love you not despite but because of who you are and if you are struggling to find those people, make sure to care about and support and love yourself!! because you are beautiful and strong and worthy for just existing in this world that is trying it’s damn hardest to make it difficult <3 i love you for all the wonderful confusing doesn’t make sense and doesn’t have to lovely rainbow of a human being you are

24. what’s one thing you’re proud of yourself for?

jesus u fr chose the hard ones bestie 😭😭 um i’d say one thing i am proud of myself for is how much i’ve grown over just the last year or so? i’ve found so many incredible resources and learned through research and communities and self reflection SO much about myself and about others!! i’m really proud of how much more informed and critically thinking and mature i am today, and how much i’ve learned about my own biases and those present in the institutions controlling our everyday lives. obviously still working on it but i think i can say i’m much more able to see things in a nuanced way and im more informed about a TON of things that i previously assumed i knew! i also love how this has really fed my curiosity and also allowed me to connect with other people like y’all in communities i never would have reached out to otherwise <3

well oh my gosh. would you look at this. kiri finished an ask response the???? day of?????? thank you so much for the ask bestie ilysm hopefully this unedited rant was understandable <333 have a slay day u icon

#personal #kiri asks!#lgbtq

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avatarfandompolice · 2 years

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Are you stupid or deliberately trying to put words in my mouth because it's the only way to support your argument? Never said a woman couldn't be successful and have a romantic relationship, I implied I didn't like that Katara was turned into (virtually) nothing but the Avatar's girlfriend and later trophy wife and I actually implied that she did end up having a romantic relationship with an unspecified man, hence the last line where I deliberately mentioned a granddaughter.

I don't know about you but I think having grandkids means you got married or at least had children with someone at some point. It was an afterthought because while family is very important to Katara she's not obligated to hook up with anyone or have children, the important part is that she is able to be independent and live a life for herself outside of Aang or Zuko because she doesn't need or want to be tied down to them and there are actually huge problems with both relationships that make either ship a terrible idea.

This isn't a AO3 100k word Soulmate AU fic where everything about your life revolves around your romantic relationship with someone and that is the pinnacle of life fulfillment for you. Let Katara have goals, let her become a leader of her community and the forefront of a cultural revolution, let her inspire little girls to follow their dreams and make a place for themselves in the world instead of assuming housekeeping and childrearing is their only possible future. That's what my entire post was about.

But because I put "anti-kataang" in the tags I'm a misogynist? Are you on goddamn drugs??? You have no argument here and you know it, this entire debate started because I had the audacity to criticize your ship, but because you didn't have an actual argument you deliberately misinterpreted my words, tried to deflect by saying I'm "bringing up shipping" in a post about shipping, and then when you couldn't think of anything else told a black woman that's she's "sexist".

You should've just kept your mouth shut and kept scrolling, because I don't actually care whether or not you ship Kataang, or Zutara for that matter, I made a post on my own damn blog about the inherit mistreatment of Katara as a character and never said a single thing about whether or not anyone was allowed to ship Kataang or not. I put anti-kataang and anti-zutara in the tags because I am personally against those ships. not anti-kataang shippers, not anti-zutara, shippers, and certainly not anti-katara. you call yourself fandom police yet you attack people for not liking your ship? like I said before, the least you could do is admit you're not any semblance of an authority figure within the fandom space and change your url to kataang-defense-squad, because that's clearly the only thing you care about here. Ship what you want, if it's not supporting problematic shit (racism, pedo shit, the obvious), I literally don't care. Unlike you I'm not attacking people over an honest to god ship. This all started because you had the audacity to call me a misogynist WHEN YOU'RE NOT EVEN A WOMAN YOURSELF. If you were another female I wouldn't be half as pissed off, but no, a gay man thinks he has the right to call a woman sexist. Go to Reddit with that shit, I'm not having it here. Goodbye, and thank you for being an even bigger idiot than I am for wasting my time on you to begin with.

pretty long response for someone who “doesn’t care” lmao

#also I don’t have to be a chef to know when food is burned

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seyferta · 2 years

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“The woke world is a world of snitches, informants, rats. Go to any space concerned with social justice and what will you find? Endless surveillance. Everybody is to be judged. Everyone is under suspicion. Everything you say is to be scoured, picked over, analyzed for any possible offense. Everyone’s a detective in the Division of Problematics, and they walk the beat 24/7. You search and search for someone Bad doing Bad Things, finding ways to indict writers and artists and ordinary people for something, anything. That movie that got popular? Give me a few hours and 800 words. I’ll get you your indictments. That’s what liberalism is, now — the search for baddies doing bad things, like little offense archaeologists, digging deeper and deeper to find out who’s Good and who’s Bad. I wonder why people run away from establishment progressivism in droves.“

-Freddie deBoer, “Planet of Cops”

"The woke world is full of snitches, informants, rats..." and indeed it is. After I reblogged this quote earlier this year [I had to make a new post bc Tumblr wouldn’t let me reblog the original], the user I reblogged this from immediately blocked me and sent me an unsavory message—they told me how dare I follow them and then called me a "TERF dipshit" and a "fascist r*tard," presumably because they saw my bio, where I openly state that I advocate for LGB rights. First and foremost this is an art and æsthétique blog, but go off I guess.

How beautifully and fantastically ironic that on a post about how the woke world constantly scourges and analyzes everything everyone says and does... that this user visited my blog to scourge and analyze my beliefs and henceforth deemed them NOT acceptable. I was dealt with swiftly: I was called slurs, blocked, and forbidden from interacting with this user ever again. I was cancelled, because it's wrong to support same-sex attracted gay men and lesbians... but that's besides the point.

Looking back, I feel like so many people complain about how "woke" and "progressive" the world has become, but yet they blindly participate in the same practices. Not everyone we interact with online will be "ideologically pure" and keep the same beliefs and values as us, and that's okay. Social justice really is a mirror; some of you need look deeply at yourselves before you stare judgmentally at others.

#seyferta speaks

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hellomynameisbisexual · 3 years

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“QUEER”

First of all, let’s clear up a common misconception. Queer does not just mean gay. It’s an umbrella term for an identity which deviates from society’s perceived norm: heterosexual, or straight. Queer can refer to sexualities — gay, bisexual, pansexual, — or it can refer to being gender-queer; i.e, any label that deviates from the perceived gender norm: the binaries, male and female.

“Queer” is a reclaimed slur.

If you do not fall under the umbrella of queerness, it is safe to assume that you cannot use it. At all.

I am bisexual.

This means I experience attraction to plural genders. Pansexual also works fine. For the difference between bisexual and pansexual — see here:

Being bisexual isn’t easy. I went through similar hardships to gay women: I experienced attraction to women and was scared of what this meant for me, in such an oppressively homophobic society.

I am not saying being bisexual is harder than being gay, nor the inverse. But my experiences are distinctly bisexual, not gay.

Without further ado, here are the 3 things I’ve found to be the hardest about being queer, but not gay (enough).

#1: Finding My Place

Or, not being queer enough

I always knew I wasn’t straight, but I didn’t know what I was. Up until recently, I was still questioning. This didn’t feel enough to join groups or conversations with LGBT+ folk, let alone go to pride. Was I even LGBT if I was never L, G, B, or T?

I am still yet to attend a pride, even though I identify (fairly confidently) as bisexual. I am in a relationship with a man. This is (problematically) known as a “straight-passing relationship” and makes me feel even more undeserving of a place at pride.

This has been upsetting to me at times. But for others, it can be outright devastating. Growing up and needing support, but feeling like you’re ‘not gay enough’ to ask for it? So many young people are being left alone and afraid. Finding others like you is vital to figuring out who you are. Likewise, finding spaces which are safe and inclusive is vital for anyone, regardless of their sexuality or gender identity. A friend of mine happens to be a transgender man, and he summed up the issue perfectly:

“One thing that I keep noticing is how all hangout spots are “gay bars”, or (far less common) “lesbian bars”. I’m a straight man, so I don’t feel like I’m supposed to be there, but hanging out at regular bars is still too much of a gamble, so I don’t really have anywhere to go.”

It goes without saying that gay folk aren’t always safe in these spaces, as seen by the homophobic attack on the Pulse nightclub in Orlando, in 2016. Bigotry hurts the entire LGBT+ community. Bigotry doesn’t stop to ask whether you identify as gay or otherwise queer before it pulls the trigger.

But the LGBT+ community itself is much more welcoming to those who “pick a side” and just come out as gay, already. The infighting is inexplicable when one looks to attacks such as that in Orlando: bigots don’t care which letter you are in the acronym. So why does gatekeeping exist when we need to be strong in the face of intolerance when fragmentation only makes us weaker? Who are we helping by continuing to exclude identities from the discussion?

#2: Myths and Misconceptions

Well, it stands to reason that if bisexuals are what they seem in TV and movies, why would anyone want to make them feel included? They’re “greedy” and inauthentic. They’re attention-seeking, not to mention their propensity for threesomes. Now, I haven’t been in a wild orgy yet, but it seems like it will only be a matter of time before I follow my natural path.

Straight men, in particular, need to own up to their assumption that bisexual women are down for a threesome. The thing is, we are. But not with you, you big ASSUMER.

Infidelity

All jokes aside, the stereotyping of bisexuals is not only hurtful, but leads to difficulties finding and maintaining relationships.

As I came to terms with my bisexuality, I also had to accept that I might never be fully trusted by my partner, regardless of their gender or sexuality. I was shocked when my partner reacted to my coming out with the equivalent of a shrug — so much so, that I burst into tears of gratitude that my soul-bearing moment hadn’t been met with slut-shaming or assumptions of disloyalty. Nothing has changed. If anything, our bond is even stronger for me having been more authentic after coming out.

But cruelty came from elsewhere: when I came out, I was told that my partner was to be pitied, either because I’m gay and in denial, or bound to cheat on him. The main consequence of such attitudes has been the crippling fear of coming out to my partner. It saddens me that I felt so relieved when he accepted me for being who I am, and loving him just the same as I always have.

This outcome is not the case for many couples, with straight folk worried that their bisexual partner will realise they’re gay and just leave them. This fear of abandonment comes from a place of ignorance. When the media presents bisexuality as a steppingstone on the way to “picking a team”, it’s no wonder that people struggle to trust their queer partners.

Other Queer Myths

The myth that all trans folk medically transition invalidates those who choose not to do so, and let’s not forget the ignorant jeers that it's all just a mental illness. Asexual folk battle the stereotype that they can never have a relationship and shall forever remain a virgin (because what an awful thing that would be, right?) And pansexuals… well, at the lighter end, they’re asked if they have sex with cooking utensils. But often, they’re erased as irrelevant because “we already have the label bisexual”.

This brings us onto the third and final difficulty that comes with queer folk who aren’t easily categorizable as gay: erasure.

#3: Erasure

Erasure refers to the denial of an identity’s existence or its validity as a label.

Non-binary folk face ongoing and loud claims that they simply do not exist. This is despite the historical and scientific evidence to the contrary. Plus, the most important evidence — them, existing. Asexual folk are told they simply have not found the right person yet, or that they are just afraid of sex. Demi-sexual folk are told “everyone feels like that, unless they’re just sleeping around!”. And bisexuals are dismissed as simply being in denial that they’re gay.

Monosexuality & The Gender Binary

Our culture is so built on monosexuality (being solely attracted to one gender — for instance, gay or straight). Monosexuality is reinforced through everything from marriage to dating apps, the media to what we teach in schools. People cannot fathom that someone might want to experience more than one gender in their lifetime.

The binary models of sex and gender are also deeply ingrained. These rigid belief systems combined are to blame for our inability to accept that bisexuals do not need to “pick a side”. I was paralysed by fear for 17 years because I found girls attractive and that might mean I’m gay, because bisexuals are just gays who haven’t realised they’re gay yet.

Bierasure

Bierasure is dangerous, firstly because it leads a child to have to internalise both biphobia and homophobia. For instance, I had to work through being taught to hate gayness, whilst being taught that any attraction to non-male genders made me gay.

Women were cute, and so I was gay, and this meant I was disgusting.

My own mother told me this. She also told me that something has “gone wrong in the womb” for a child to be gay. (Well, Mum, I’ve got some bad news about your womb!)And she, like any bigot, extended this theory to anyone who experiences same-sex attractions �� anyone queer. This is another reason why bi-erasure is perilous. Whether you’re a gay, cis-male or a demi-bisexual, trans woman… if your parents will kick you out for being gay, they will likely kick you out for being any sort of queer.

If we deny the bigotry that bisexuals undergo, we will continue to suffer. It won’t just go away. It will fester, with bisexuals having no one they can go to who believes them. And thus:

Erasure Kills

Bullying and suicide rates of queer-but-not-gay people continue to sky-rocket. We must direct funding, support and compassion to every queer individual, as they are all vulnerable to discrimination and bullying. The problem is being left to fester. This is in part because bigots treat all queer labels as just ‘gay’, deeming them equally unworthy. This is how far erasure can go.

Conclusion

Earlier on, I stated that my experiences are distinctly bisexual. The same applies to any queer identity.

Emphasising our differing paths and struggles is important to avoid the aforementioned erasure of already less visible groups. But this does not mean that the LGBT+ community should be fragmented by these differences.

If we can unite in our hope to live authentically and love freely, we will be stronger against bigotry. We are fighting enough intolerance from without: there is no need to create more from within.

So out of everything, what’s the hardest part about being bisexual?

It’s the fact that nobody knows it’s this hard.

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ivyglow · 3 years

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psa + deactiv for a bit

I had some time to read what some people were saying out there and it really saddens me how many “I’m lgbtqia+ and I don’t see anything wrong with the tweets” or “at his age I used to say the same things”, this shows us two things 1) some of you were/are really privileged for not understanding that this is systemic violence, therefore, the person who said the slur doesn’t need to mean it in a bad way because it’s a slur no matter the context and 2) some of you think that just because something happened in the past you don’t need to apologize or recognize your mistakes, which is awful, I’m sorry.

Being a black girl and having a white mother taught me a lot about acknowledgment, just a couple years ago I started calling my mom out in some of her actions and she made me a lot of questions, we discussed a series of topics and her view on racism has been amplified, just a couple months ago she came to me and she apologized for something she did when I was a five years old kid, she said she was sorry if she ever made me feel bad about my skin, or my nose or anything regarding my blackness, she apologize for things she realizes were wrong to my sister too (and my sister is white, so this isn’t only about the “woke” subject as some people try to make it seem). I’ve never asked my mom to apologize, she also never asked me to forgive her, but I’m sure if she was a public person and something came out about her hurting someone (intently or not) she would apologize, because this is how we grow and this is how we acknowledge our mistakes. We understand that we’re inserted into a bigger space and this space influences how we react to some things, but when we have the opportunity to do better: we do better.

Systemic violence such as racism and homophobia don’t necessarily need the other part to mean harm, because again: it's systemic. Slurs were wrong back then and they still wrong nowadays. It doesn’t mean that because you used it back then you’re a homophobe now, but it means that you hurt someone at the time and how you react and respond to this situation now says something about who you are in the present. I’m so so sad with people saying they used to say it therefore it's not a problem or that he was a kid. Yes, it was something “common” to SOME of you at the time, but it doesn’t mean it was right and if any of you ever get the opportunity to apologize to someone that was around you at the time: please, do. Yes, nols was a teenager at the time, but as a white, rich boy he gets to have the “space to grow” and make mistakes that bipoc and some lgbtqia+ never had. My brother has the same age as Nolan, and he wasn’t excused for his mistakes -no matter how small they were- because he was a black kid.

When I say publicly talking and apologizing, addressing the issue, I mean it so people can see that no matter if for some it seemed ok back then, it wasn’t. Some of you didn’t felt personally attacked by the slurs, which is fine but to say that it wasn’t harmful reduces the feeling of a whole group to your own feelings, it makes exactly what those acts of violence do: it treats us as homogenous.

I’m completely fine with people supporting him, I really am, it wasn’t my intention to make everyone angry with my first post, I was addressing an issue that was brought to me in my ask box, saying how hockey culture is not something that starts on the nhl or isn’t influenced by the majority there (white, rich, cis, etc). Whoever took the time to read the whole thing saw that I said everything people are repeating there: he was a teenager, probably space, where he grew up, didn’t really introduce him on social issues, people probably never called him out on that at the time and so on, but this doesn’t change the fact that slurs aren’t ok. It strikes me as some of you still live in a fairytale where we get to have bad guys and good guys, but we're human beings and we need to start understanding that someone can do something bad in the past without necessarily being a bad person (that goes from problem to problem, of course). You say you want to change hockey culture and that you want to do better but when a bipoc/lgbtqia+ points an issue and wants to debate it y’all are quick to choose the one who has the same view as you and use it (@someone is gay and didn’t felt affected by it, therefore, it isn’t a big deal!!!), and it's just curious, honestly.

You also feel as if you have the right to come to my inbox and say hateful stuff, question my views and point a finger at me. I’m not perfect nor I expect any player to be, I’m well aware they are mostly white rich men, and the environment they grew up in is completely different from what we would expect as the ideal, but it doesn’t mean that we’re gonna simply ignore issues. That being said I’m not answering about this topic anymore, its tiring and stressful especially when people already have everything out there, and what I keep doing is basically repeating myself in different ways just so yall get your message. I’m not here to educate, this is supposed to be a safe space for me, yet I do talk about these topics because I know we need it more around here. The fact that some of you choose to block me (when we never really talked!!!), point me as a problematic blog, or diminish the topic, shows a lot about hockey culture (that is very present between the fans, not only in the league).

When you start to realize that part of the discomfort we feel while dealing with these issues is the key to changing the situation we’re gonna start going somewhere, while you keep diminishing it and trying to make excuses we’ll be stuck.

I recommend you to read mia’s rant about it here. Also, take some time to read about the nwhl situation here.

I’m leaving for a while, maybe a day or two or maybe a week, I’m not sure, I just need some time to get my energy back, I deal with this shit every day irl, I shouldn’t have to feel bad in here. I’m really thankful for all the supportive people and I’m really sorry for the hateful anons or the people who felt like I was attacking them or their fave, that wasn’t my intention (especially because nols was my fav too, but I personally felt kinda off, maybe in a different time I wouldn’t feel off and that's ok too). Anyway, I hope I see y’all soon in a better vibe than that (those last lb’s were really good for me btw! you guys are amazing) and if you miss me that much (jk) you can ask for my discord acc to my tito ( @barbienoturbby ). love yall <3 mel

I’m turning my anons back because of all the named anons I had and I know some of them don’t have a tumblr acc but please: don’t send in shitty things/hate, just go live your life the way you want and leave me in peace.

sorry for the long rant, I just felt like clarifying things because besides the asks there are people blocking me and unf me like crazy which is ?????

#nolpats hasn't show signals of being problematic like other players in our league and when we point an issue it seems as if were accusing +#him of being #which we're not doing #we're just starting an important debate and looking for acknowledgment #nolpats still a good person in my head #but it doesn’t change the fact that he just like some of us did something wrong and the right thing to do is act on it #anyway #I'll probably bb cuz I think I'll miss lbs and some of my friends and anons #important #mel rambles #see yall soon I hope <3 #muah #hugs kisses and all the rainbows hearts and stars emojis I usually use jaja #i queued some stuff so you might see my user around this week assjsj #ill make sure to queue some more hihi #see you soon guys!#nolan patrick #this is the last thing im tagging about him btw #no worries about clogging since im not talking about it again too :)#s all good #yall can move on w your lives

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nightswithkookmin · 3 years

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Goldy I never thought I would reach out to any Jikook blog but after your last post I have to. I am an east asian american and trans. I have never spoken on this issue, commented or posted about this. I am a Jikook supporter but sometimes Jikook supporting blogs don't feel like the friendliest place. I want to thank you for changing my opinion on that. It is an insult to BTS to say Jikook don't know they seem gay or that they don't know what gay looks like. It is an insult to fans like me to say it would be OK to do the things they do if they were cisgendered straight men. I personally saw a few people say or dance around this and they got intimidated by big blogs for it. I would never name names because I beleive in free speech and the right of people to express themselves, as long as it isn't hate speech. Supporting lgbt people and making sure they don't feel endangered is MORE IMPORTANT THAN STANNING A KPOP BAND and I say this as a 4 year long bts and Jikook stan. So many people don't want to touch this issue and I understand why.

But thank you for supporting ACTUAL lgbt people as well as bts and showing stubborn people that BTS mean gay rights when they say gay rights.

I don't know why but this Ask made me cry...

I've been reading it over and over for the past two days and each time I feel humbled by it. Thanks so much for sharing this with me.

I think the era of the obsessed 'kids' and '13 year old shippers' in this space is coming to an end. I think it's time for a more nuanced mature conversation on what it means to ship and stan our faves in today's sociopolitical climate.

Let's intellectualize shipping and use it as a vehicle for social change not just pleasure. Sabotaging political hashtags is a start. Trending and donating to BLM is equally important. Fighting for gay rights and recognition is the next step and a natural progression from here- and about damn time!

Gone are the days where celebrities and idols were immune to accountability and personal responsibility. We live in a world where everyone is required to be converstant in and sensitive to social issues. Awareness is woven into our collective consciousness and for some of us we cannot divorce that from our pleasure receptors.

Hate to quote my pastor but, 'As a kid, I spoke, thought and reasoned like a kid. As I grew up, chilee darling, I put my ghetto ways aside. You feel me?' Lol. Yea, my pastor hood like that. Lol.

The fact of the matter is, BTS has a higher mature demographics now. Majority of us grew with them, if not past them. They are not seventeen anymore, Jin is almost thirty, the youngest in the group is past twenty three and majority of their fanbase are breaching Young Adult well into Adulthood and beyond.

We simply cannot view them with the same lens anymore. If we did, we would be infantilizing them if not enabling them.

We ought to be able to have certain conversations that reflect our age, hearts, backgrounds, experience, values and beliefs.

We can't sit behind our television sets and smart phone screens in this day and age and assume BTS sat through a performance like this and did not for a second think about what it meant, why the crowd cheered at certain moments or even understand the impact, message and intent behind it- especially not when Halsey, an openly bisexual woman and advocate for LGBTG rights is an acquaintance of thiers.

I don't know how a fraction of this fandom can assume BTS would have a collaboration of this nature and not know anything about the gay rights discourse or what queer baiting is or not consider how their actions may or may not be contributing to the marginalization of persons as these- to not have agency and personal responsibility or empathy.

JK cannot stan a gay artist such as Troye Sivan and divorce his music from his sexuality because it flows from it. Not when Troye has openly spoken about the struggles he went through as a closeted gay man, coming out and how that affected his mental health.

JK knows what gay is, he is aware of the struggles queer people face on a daily. His decision to cover, license and recommend songs by this artist is a deliberate act coming from a place of being informed on the matter.

Jimin knows. RM knows. Suga knows.

BTS cannot prepare a speech like this while oblivious to the plight of the LGBTQ plus community. I refuse to believe that simply because it's not true. Anyone who says otherwise is a scammer. Lol.

And I think they are intelligent enough to have cognisance of the fact majority of the world view certain aspects of their home culture as problematic and non-progressive and that this same world is watching them and what they do in this space matters.

They are part of the conversation. And it's in their interest to present themselves as queer a queer friendly band and company by distinctifying themselves from these 'traditional' Kpop bands.

I believe they know that being woke gives them a competitive advantage as MCs and advocates for the youth in today's world.

I believe they are aware certain things in their 'fan service culture' doesn't fly in the space they compete in and want to compete in. They are competing and rubbing shoulders with top LGBTQ plus advocates, sharing seats with them at awards, standing next to them- they best to look sharp.

It's obtuse for anyone to fall on the 'culture' rhetoric to excuse certain behaviors of their idols when actual queer people from and within that same culture fight against it.

Most S. koreans I know and have come across complain about their 'culture' and some even harbor strong resentments against this whole fanservice culture.

Holland, an openly gay Idol from South Korea, has equally spoken out against the 'fan service' culture prevalent within Kpop on several occasions and laments how it depoliticizes queerness and affects actual queer people within S.K.

And isn't it funny that the same conservative Christian population who strongly oppose homosexuality in S.K often lead online campaigns against Jikook for 'promoting homosexuality' because of certain fanservice and skinship they do?

If skinship is normal and fanservice is culture, why does conservative S.K keep pushing back against it? It's their culture uno?! Lmho.

Queer south Koreans and conservative Christians hate fanservice culture and yet here we are using their culture to defend it as if it's all black and white. Lmho.

Did they or did they not see South Korean's reactions to this performance by Jikook? The mixed feelings most had about it?

Men can nibble on men's ear but God forbid they toss them in the air and catch em💀

South Koreans are not a monolith. Their culture is nuanced like any culture. It's not static and not clear cut black and white either.

It's one thing to respect other's culture, it's another to perpetuate it in ignorance. Perpetuating their culture and being religious about it does not allow for the dynamism inherent in their culture.

Troye Sivan talked about how he'd stop in the middle of his concerts and performances upon seeing the hyper fangirls in the front row and then think to himself, 'I know they know I'm gay, so why are they still here...'

And this was before he came out.

Jikook know we know they are queer or that we think of them as queer. When Jimin talks about 'those that love me for me' he knows exactly what he is talking about or rather who he is talking to- it's not these hets I'm afraid.

Troye also talked about being privileged because he lived in a rather queer friendly neighborhood where everyone is gay and so he'd always felt safe coming out.

Isn't that what JK is doing?

Now this is a person who's without a doubt had a lot of influence on JK in his early formative years as an Idol right down to his decision to move into a much queer friendly neighborhood of Itaewon.

They know we know. Jikook is gay.

Thankfully, there are reports of a rising number of LGBTQ plus in South Korea, a lot of allies, a lot of queer folks coming out and a lot of companies opening up to working with gay idols and aspiring idols.

It's such a relief but a lot of work still needs to be done and I stand with them on behalf of Jikook and any queer folk in SK.

My sister is helping me reach out to an LGBTQ plus advocate from Seoul for an interview for my blog. If everything goes well, I'd love for her to share her thoughts on queer passing, queer baiting and fan service within Kpop and how that affects LGBTQ youth in South K.

It's a conversation I'm really passionate about and interested in.

I love me some ships, but I also love me some queer advocacy and human rights uno? Lol.

Thing is, I may quit BTS one day, but I can never quit being me. Being human. Always put the human first is my motto.

Oh and I hear people are plotting to cancel me? Chilee. Y'all do that but:

Let it echo.

Signed,

GOLDY

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sinnhelmingr · 3 years

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a few things and then i will shut up:

to the repeat accusations that i’m an enemy of the state bc i don’t support problematic lgbt representation or i sometimes write my (queer) female character into relationships with characters that canonically have an (equally queer) romance, i want to reiterate that i am queer myself. i’m under that wild lawless multi-identity umbrella that is best summarized as queer, but also comes down to being a nonbinary lesbian on the ace spectrum. that’s a mouthful. queer is easier. but yes, i am part of the community, and me not agreeing with your ship or having fun on the internet does not lessen my being a part of the community. the no true scotsman fallacy does not protect you from the fact i occupy the same space as you in a way you deem ‘problematic.’

i use queer liberally. no, it is not a slur. it is mine to reclaim, and i do, both personally and to describe my creative output. what you mean, anon, is that you perceive it as a slur and are uncomfortable with being addressed as such, and that’s valid! it’s a loaded word! but a lot of elder gays, myself included, have reclaimed it, so it’s not the ‘gotcha!’ you want to think you got over me. end of the day, i’m still a dyke whether you like my terminology or not.

i don’t know why people think i’m this evil puppetmaster with droves of adoring uhhh what was it? ‘bootlickers’? at my beck and call but my followers clearly disagree with my detractors on their own merits and i am not holding a gun to my shipping partners demanding they write dynamics that i define and force them to act out. there is no conspiracy here. i am just an idiot who sometimes words good and does a little dance for the amusement of my audience. sometimes anons just don’t realize how stupid they sound and people call out the spotlight i put on that stupidity. play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

i’m 27 years old. i am too old to look at the scraps major studios throw at the community and think it’s unproblematic brilliance. i’ve seen the leaps and bounds the community has gone through in terms of major studio rep since even the 90s, and i’m not here for ships suddenly being free of sin bc they’re queer. that way lies madness and complacency but some people seem to think any awful dynamic is redeemable so long as it is queer. as if there’s no bad press for a community that is still trying to fight their way out of generations of that press. i am also too old to act like what i do for free in my increasingly sparse spare time on a hellsite no one will remember in a decade is an attack on some community or another because i don’t respect the sacred canon. some of you desperately need to touch grass before it’s too late.

#negative //#out of mist #JUST SINCE THESE POINTS KEEP GETTING DRUDGED UP LIKE ANONS THINK THEY GOT ME.

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headcannonballs · 3 years

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Evangelion 3.0 + 1.0 came out two months ago, and Kawoshin is officially not canon. And as a Kawoshin shipper, that is completely okay. I still think that Asuka is toxic, and Shinji is bi, and Kaworu and Shinji are soul mates.

But guess what? I don't need Kawoshin to be canon. I don't even need them to be romantically attracted to each other. I just like that Shinji has his safe space in Kaworu whenever he needed him.

I think more shippers need to be rational in their shipping, stop posing their version of fanon as canon, and stop terrorising everyone who disagrees with them.

So what brought this sudden epiphany was that I was browsing reddit and came across a certain impassioned defense of a ship that, unfortunately, was not canon. However, the shippers decided that somehow they were morally entitled to get their ship recognised by canon, and so took actions to terrorise all the creators and people associated with the fandom until they got what they wanted. (which they ended up not getting. Lol.)

The reddit post was extremely one-sided, very obviously biased, and the reddit comments majority formed an echo chamber to affirm the poster that yes, the creators were queer-baiting, everyone could see the blatant subtext, the cancelling of the ship was homophobic.

Now I've seen ship wars across many fandoms, and I've noticed the rising trend of making use of LGBT signalling to try to force creators into making queer ships canon despite there being no canon support for it. This is especially ironic when large parts of these shippers tend to be young heterosexual females who love the idea of two men in a sexual relationship, despite themselves not really being invested enough in the individual characters to like any of their canon ships.

Just to make things clear, I have nothing against fujoshi. Hell I can probably be considered one myself, as I do ship multiple gay pairings (not as many as het pairings, but definitely a non-zero number). What I do dislike in shippers is the insistence on their ship being the OTP for the fandom, and if their fanon is contradicted by canon, then it is the canon which is at fault.

The fact is, at the end of the day, canon is the basis of the fandom. All other fanons and headcannons sprout from canon, but they are derivatives, and not the original. No one is stopping you from having your version of the story, but repeated insistence and tantrums will not make your version the correct version.

I'm not going to delve into every problematic popular queer fanon ship that shippers tried to make canon here, but suffice to say that there is one similarity I see in majority of them - they tend not to be healthy relationships. Because there is usually a reason the ships were not canon in the first place, but the shippers just refuse to acknowledge it.

Be it because the character(s) in canon are heterosexual (which shippers love to insert gaynst in to symbolize their 'awakening'), perhaps even married (which is totally okay because their wives are beards and the characters are assholes), not really that close to each other (but they are totally in love secretly), enemies (which is apparently just foreplay for foe-yay), or even plain rejected each other (because it is totally fine to have non-consensual relations and it is romantic).

Look, I'm not saying stop shipping altogether. I'm saying stop pushing your version of fanon subtext as the one truth because it irritates the hell out of people and paints a bad picture of your ship (or even your whole fandom).

Plenty of the troublemakers originated here in tumblr. Not sure if any of them will see it, but just needed to get this off my chest.

Oh yes, and Kawoshin is still love. Maybe platonic love or agape love or one-sided love, but still canonically love. And that is good enough for me.

#kawoshin #neon genesis evangelion #the problem with shipping #I mean I totally get being invested in a shop #But that in itself doesn't validate the ship #Only canon should count in fandom discussions #Because misinformation is totally a thing #And plenty of shipping wars are started because of it #Stop pestering creators to make fanon ships canon #Really just stop #You shippers should know who you are

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nothorses · 3 years

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i love my cis women friends but sometimes they make me really uncomfortable. i feel like they find every way possible to call me (essentially) a woman or a freak. i often get “🥺 baby”-fied, get called “twink” and “bottom” as jokey insult, and whenever i try to express my femininity or love for men (which has been a huge struggle for me because of the way i feel that im feminized) im either uwu’d or told i look/am “cursed”. even when i express myself masculinely, i feel like im seen as a girl making a weak attempt at dressing like a boy. the reason i have a problem with being called a twink/bottom is because the reason im small and feminine is because im trans. i feel like my body (which im already dysphoric about) is being targeted and made fun of, and even though “twink” is a term used for men, i feel that the crux of the joke is that being a feminine-looking man is stupid, funny, or beneath “real men”. I understand its a common joke, but it makes me really uncomfortable. am i being too sensitive? i might not have explained myself the best or given the best examples, but it’s something that really bothers me. im very grateful for my friends, they’re otherwise very supportive of me! this sort of thing just kind of eats at me and I don’t know whether or not to bring it up.

Oh, no, I absolutely feel that. I also get called a twink or a bottom as well, and I understand it’s coming from a good place and it’s folks who want to validate me as a gay man, but like... I wish people thought about why they assume I’m a bottom. Despite the fact that I pretty much never talk about my sexual preferences, ever, and despite the fact that the rare time or two I have, I, uh, very explicitly said I am not a bottom?

And why twink? I get that it’s a body type thing; it’s something a person can’t really determine themselves because of the way mlm culture deals with bodies. But the way mlm culture deals with bodies is genuinely problematic, and the only reason it isn’t considered fatphobic is because of the work fat gay men did to bring in “bear” as a way to celebrate fat gay men. That, uh, doesn’t solve the problems with the body type thing as a whole.

Also, idk, if you wanna validate your local trans mlm... maybe take their transition goals into account? Get to know them as a person? Figure out what they actually like to be called? Don’t default to the body type explicitly for thin, feminine young men?

I think a huge part of this problem is that people just do not think critically about mlm culture, or the way they treat transmascs as a whole. They do not place value in mlm culture, mlm struggles, transmasc struggles, or anything of the sort. To the overwhelming majority of people who say things like this, the biggest struggle transmascs have is not being validated enough in our manhood.

It sucks. The conversation in the queer community right now is fairly dominated by queer women’s struggles, leaving little space for communities and issues that don’t revolve around women to take place. Why talk about mlm culture as it impacts mlm? Why talk about how cis mlm impact trans mlm? Why talk about how cis people impact transmascs? Men Are Trash! We don’t need to talk about their communities, cultures, or struggles; just Throw The Whole Man Out!

If you think they’ll listen, and if it makes you uncomfortable, you should absolutely bring it up. You deserve to be heard, your comfort deserves consideration, and your friends should care that they’re being transphobic and hurtful when they make these comments.

#transmasc #transphobia #transandrophobia #not horses #long post #Anonymous

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rpbetter · 3 years

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"writes dubcon therefore is a freak who should be bullied off the site" ho boy i'm fed up with people acting as if consenting adults writing [insert "problematic" fictional thing here] is the worst thing in the world. seen way too many people justifying harrassment of REAL PEOPLE by "they write thing that triggers me". ok, and? mute the tags or don't follow! "it triggers someone" is not a valid reason to ban a topic. piano music triggers me yet i don't go around demanding everyone stop playing the piano.

Anon, not only is everything you said absolutely valid, but also, thank you for demonstrating that triggers are incredibly varied and as such, we cannot predict everyone's triggers. Making the entire "point" of banning for possible triggers invalidated as hell.

We should be aware of things like the most commonly occurring phobias (things like arachnophobia and coulrophobia that are, additionally, easily triggered by imagery) and tag them. We should be aware of very obvious triggers, that are, again, easily set off by imagery, like blood, eye trauma, and depictions of domestic violence. And we should always read and be aware of our writing partners' stated triggers so that we can tag them appropriately or even decide that it isn't going to work because our muse, canon story, or interests are going to present an unfair situation in this partnership.

But triggers can be highly unusual, as well as activated differently (even at different times) for everyone. I'm not triggered by seeing hotel rooms in pictures or movies, I'm not triggered by writing scenes that take place in them, but I'm triggered to some degree by being in one. It's outrageous oversimplification to act like all triggers are the same, they all display the same way, they're all going to trigger someone on the same basis, everyone's going to react the same to their triggers. There is absolutely no way to prevent 100% of possible triggers for 100% of the population, 100% of the time.

Add to this that way too many people trivialize triggers by throwing around that term to justify the banning of something that makes them uncomfortable or that they take a personal, moral issue with. "I don't like this" and "I'm grossed out by this" and "this makes me feel uncomfortable" is not being triggered. It's just a good way to weaponize the better nature of other people so that they comply.

Most people legitimately do not want to trigger someone, especially if they have triggers and know what it's like. Just like no one wants to be accused of cruelty towards trauma survivors in general, or be designated a pedo, rape apologist, or fascist. They're all things to weaponize in order to isolate, shame, and control. And that's really fucking gross. These are serious, real things that have no business being trivialized to police content, win internet arguments, or garner popularity.

The potential for someone to be triggered isn't a reason to ban anything; we have tags, we have blacklist.

While I'll be the first to say that tumblr's blacklisting can be as shitty as everything else on the site, the primary issue with running into content you don't want to see comes down to two factors: no one tagging/tagging correctly and actively exposing yourself to that content. Going through people's properly done tags and blog warnings about their content in order to "call it out" is actively exposing yourself by choice. You actual walnuts.

Calling people on on their "problematic" content is bringing those topics to the attention of other people. That's the whole point of this gross behavior: look at the freak pedo abuse apologist I found, they write dubcon!! Don't look if you'll be triggered uwu

Buddy, pal, my guy...you just put that on blast for anyone to run across. Maybe their blacklist catches those words in your callout post, maybe it doesn't. Maybe they think you're a safe space because you promote yourself that way, so they click it anyway. Point is, you just willfully and irresponsibly exposed people because it's more important to you to demonize a rando on tumblr RPing something you take issue with. Good job!

Furthermore, dubcon itself is such a hilarious issue to take. Do they realize that isn't always sexual, or? Not? I'm thinking not. Funnily enough, one of the oldest posts I've been working on for this blog is about exactly this topic, the myriad situations that are dubious consent. That doesn't have to be sexual, and neither does it have to be intentionally predatory. You can come up with some amazing character development with a lot of muses in the RPC with dubcon because almost everyone's muse has some manner of trauma that might negate their perception of their own consent...and what do you do then? Is it removing more agency from that muse to shut them down, or is that always the better option? Can you separate your opinion as the mun from your muse's natural reactions? How does this impact the muses involved not just that moment but the next year?

Point is, dubcon isn't always some rapey situation. Even if it was, even if someone is writing it that way, it's literally not your business or your problem.

There's one mutual-in-law on my RP blog that really bothers me. They write things that I find fetishizing, incredibly rapey, all around shit that bothers me. I don't want to see it, some of the things they write makes my damn skin crawl. This person doesn't know it, we certainly don't speak and I don't think they like me very much, but I've repeatedly defended their right, specifically their right as a person with some long-term callouts on them, to write what they want to. I have them blocked and their urls blacklisted so I never have to see my mutual reblogging their threads. It's not a problem because I don't click "show anyway." Why would I, if it genuinely bothers me so much?

That's how you handle things that bother you; you use the tools available to not interact even by accident. Not by launching a morality crusade.

If any of us want to write what we enjoy, we have to allow others that same freedom. It's always a matter of time before this policing grows to include more and more topics, it's been used multiple times to get well-meaning people who don't fall into the general demographics to police queer, BIPOC, and other marginalized groups off of platforms. We've been fortunate in most of the RPC that it implodes on itself before it gets all the way there, but even so, you can see it.

It starts with things that produce a visceral reaction in the great majority of people, positions this with a repeatedly condemned idea presented as solid fact that fiction is reality, and you've got the start of something awful. Today it's something you don't like, maybe even something that triggers you, so you either support it or you quietly allow it to happen. Who needs to write that "freak shit" anyway, can't they just be gross privately? Six months from now, it's something "problematic" that you enjoy like violence that's canon-typical for your muse, or your OTP because they're gay and that's fetishizing, they're cis male and female but one or both is bi and that's bad representation, or they canonically have a rocky relationship so that's romanticizing toxic/abusive relationships.

If you can't care for any other reason, you really should care about how it is going to impact you sooner or later. In an environment like this, you can stay in your space, put warnings on your blog, and tag properly and you're still going to get a callout if the wrong person finds your blog. Just takes a single person with more time, energy, and skewed ideas of justice than they have reading comprehension or common sense.

Again, I cannot encourage people enough to give warnings, but it's difficult to ignore why those warnings are slipping; they're a way to be found, designated as a Problem, and called out. Look, it's another reason why callouts actually make things worse, not better! People put that shit in their rules so you can avoid content, they're being responsible and interested in promoting a safe RPC. Let them do it, damn.

You can't tag everything, and if you've never experienced what a giant series of repetitive tags is like on a screenreader you probably should before you tag seven paragraphs of possible issues. You can tag for visuals, you can tag for the obvious things, and you can tag for what's in the rules you agreed to when you followed/followed back. But you should also warn people that you write "dark topics" on the tin, and expand on that in your rules for specific things like graphic violence, toxic relationships, dubon, and addiction.

That's how responsible adults, not over-aged children, make better decisions about their mental health and general comfort. Not by appointing themselves the watchdogs of the damn RPC, here to protect you whether you want to be or not, find that incredibly insulting or not when you're in one of their categories of people who must be protected, by forcibly banning Problematic Everything. Problematic, of course, being entirely in the eye of the content police.

It's fiction. No one and nothing real was harmed. It's great that you are so invested in the fictional world and people that make you happy, but take a fucking big step back into reality. The real people you're harming with your bullshit had every right to peaceably exist. If what they're writing is triggering to you, stay. away. from. it.

Without any coincidence whatsoever, that's how you get from the base-point of Problematic Material to Problematic Mun. Yeah, it's just fiction, it's just RP, but I also took something out of context OOC or was upset by their tone on their own blog or couldn't exercise the minimal adult logic to remove myself from their presence OOC as well. So, now, you've got OOC behavior being added to the callout, if it wasn't already. Everyone is now ableist, transphobic, racist, and a misogynist because it lends that visceral reaction to the callout and ups the game from just being "y'all so gross you aged up a cartoon character to ship" to "this is REAL and it won't be tolerated! OP is actually a pedophile, they told a sexual joke in a discord server with a minor present and I have the receipts!"

What are the most storied callouts in the entire RPC? I'm absolutely certain the same names came to mind no matter what fandoms you're in, and one of them was "Matt." Another was probably "Ares/Snow". They're all successful and keep being brought up out of the closet anytime people are bored enough because their primary punch is the mun themselves being a predatory threat to the community. The mun is verified to be a bad person. Well, of course, that's got to be repeated, it worked. (Even if it did not, at all, work and only made it harder for people to avoid any of these muns.)

Are there people in the RPC who are legitimately a problem? Absolutely, yes. We're all supposed to be adults, however. Part of being an adult is having and acting upon one's agency. If someone is coercing you into things you are not comfortable with, shut it down. If you have difficulties being certain of those situations, run it by a trusted, honest friend or available, impartial source in the RPC for a second opinion. If you can't handle any manner of confrontation, there really are situations in which it's perfectly alright to block someone without any discussion. It's just the internet, you're in control of your space. Own it.

Minors are a whole other can of fucked up worms I'm not even getting into right now except to say that because a minor exists in a space they were told to stay out of does not mean we ban all topics inappropriate for their consumption.

tl;dr: banning shit doesn't work anyway, the whole idea is predicated upon some incredibly problematic takes IRL, and no, there's no justification for it outside of intense personal problems with one's own importance. That energy would be infinitely better spent volunteering one's time to help real people in crisis or after surviving one, or even oneself in developing some healthier approaches and thought patterns.

#hey what if we all start saying we're triggered by callout culture is that bannable then lmao #vespertine #drama cw #bsnf #callout culture #tumblr rpc #rp problems #also thank you again anon I hope you're having a great day!

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