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lovelybucky1 · 8 months

Note

rivals/enemies to lovers Anakin fic and their tension is 10000000x high all the time like😫😫😫

thank you for the ask!!! inbox open for cillian murphy and anakin

warnings: gender neutral!reader, pushy anakin, semi-public, mentions of masturbation, inappropriate use of the force, teasing, enemies to lovers, 18+ minors dni

masterlist

Anakin Skywalker might be the most infuriating person you have ever had the misfortune of meeting. The praise he constantly received for his skills during his padawan years combined with the title of "Chosen One" that is often bestowed upon him did terrible things for his ego.

He struts around the temple with so much arrogance that you can practically smell it on him. He's rude and demanding, often making some of the younger Jedi do his bidding just because they listen to him.

If they weren't scared of Anakin, they were bowing at his feet to kiss his boots. Everybody knew what Anakin was capable of, and they treated him like a god because of it. But not you.

To you, Anakin was nothing but a spoiled brat in an adult's body. He tried to enchant you, to get you under the same spell he had everyone else under, but you refused. You could recognize talent, but you would rather die than contribute to his inflated ego.

For some reason, your refusal to kiss his ass made Anakin obsessed with you. He knows you hate him, you make it obvious. Anakin has taken this hatred as a challenge; he wants to break your resolve.

Anakin is like a fly, always buzzing around your head at the least opportune times. During training, he always volunteers to be your partner. He always sits next to you at meals and during meditation. While meditating, he invades your mind just to pester you some more. At night, he appears in your dreams and you wake up pissed off at him.

This is a game to Anakin. One you despise with your entire being, but its one he never seems to tire of. It's escalated a bit over time; at first it was just teasing jibes and general annoyance, but now his remarks have a flirtatious edge to them and that makes you even angrier.

"If you were that desperate to get into my arms, you just had to ask," Anakin smirks as he looks down at where you fell against his chest. Training with Anakin is never easy, he plays dirty just so he can get you into positions such as these.

"Get the fuck off of me," you huff, pushing him away.

"What's got you in such a bad mood?" he asks, knowing full well that it's him that has you so irritated.

"One of life's greatest mysteries," you say as you get back into a fighting stance.

Training technically ended an hour ago, but Anakin kept taking you down and you couldn't leave without a victory.

"Come on, you can tell me. I can keep a secret."

You run at him, extending your foot to kick him in the shoulder but he grabs your ankle and flips you over, sending you falling face down onto the mat. You grunt when you hit the floor and roll onto your back, only to find Anakin standing over you, looking impossibly tall.

"You're my fucking problem."

You get up, swatting Anakin's hand away when he offers it to you.

"Me? What have I done to you?" he asks.

Catching him off guard, you hook your ankle around the back of his knee and bring him to the ground. He could have fought back, but he goes down easily. You stand in front of him as he kneels in front of you, not looking any less smug despite his position.

“Why do you continue to train with me if you hate me so much?” he asks.

“You choose me, asshole.”

“I don’t force you to be my partner. You could have anyone you wanted.”

You glare down at him. “I like beating the shit out of you.”

“Have you ever beat me?” he asks with a smirk. “Y’know, sometimes I get a feeling that you like me.”

“Like you?”

“Yeah. You’re always hanging around me, you dream about me, you even think about me when you meditate. That sounds a little like obsession to me.” He walks forward a bit on his knees so he’s close enough to rest his cheek against your thigh, and for some reason you don’t stop him.

“Those are all things you do, Anakin. You put those thoughts in my head.”

Anakin chuckles. “Maybe so, but I know you also think about me at night,” he rises to his feet, once again towering over you. “in bed, under the covers when you can’t get to sleep.”

You gasp, trying to cut it off before he notices but it’s too late. Anakin is close, too close, his chest mere inches away from yours.

“I didn’t put those thoughts in that pretty head. That’s all you. Your desire,” he takes ahold of your wrists and pins them at your sides. “Your dirty secrets.” His gaze is intense and it makes you want to squirm away from it.

“You’re a fucking pig,” you spit, trying to wrestle your way out of his hold but there’s no use.

“And you can’t admit what you want,” he says. “Come on, you can tell me. I promise I won’t tell a soul.” Somehow Anakin sounds earnest and you feel compelled to confess.

“I don’t like you,” you say.

“I don’t want you to.”

“I hate you.”

“I like it that way.” He looks at you expectantly. “But…?”

“There’s no but, Anakin! I’m not attracted to you,” you huff.

He rolls his eyes and smirks. “How about I tell you some things first, and then it’s your turn?” You give him a blank stare in return; he continues anyway. “I hate you. I think you’re a stubborn little bitch who hates me just because you’re jealous. You’ll never be as powerful as I am, and I know that irks you like nothing else. I hate the way you talk shit about me every chance you get to make yourself feel better. And most of all, I hate the way you pretend you don’t want me to fuck you in all the ways you fantasize about.”

You gape at him, feeling embarrassed and angry that he just exposed you so blatantly. You wrench your arms out of his hold and this time he lets you, which makes you even angrier.

“You fucking-”

“Tell me you don’t want it,” he challenges. You stare back at him. “Tell me you don’t want me to fuck you.”

There is a moment of silence; Anakin waiting for you to deny and you waiting for him to ridicule you.

Anakin steps forward and grabs your hips, pulling you flush to him. You don’t fight back.

“Nothing to say?”

“Fuck you.”

“You gotta say please if you want it so bad,” he grins.

“I hope you choke.”

In a flash, Anakin has you down on the mat, flat on your back. Your legs are spread and he’s slotted between them, leaning up on his elbows to look at you. His nose is only inches away from yours, and it’s making your blood boil.

“Don’t I feel good on top of you?” He does, and he knows it. “Just say yes, baby. I’ll fuck you right here, just how you like it.”

You grit your teeth. “Yes.”

#anakin #anakin skywalker #anakin x reader #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin smut #anakin skywalker fanfic #anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker fanfiction #star wars #star wars fanfiction #star wars smut

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tiyoin · 2 months

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fuck it predestined mate jade + jade rot

i fully think jade would date an alternative girl

not tiktok alt, but actually alternative

is this self indulgent? ABSOLUTELY- BUT PUNK PHASE JADE STILL RESIDES SO IMAGINE AN UNLIKELY LOVERS SCENARIO

he meets me you

cw : yandere coded, creepy jade, violence (to azul’s phone), jade almost getting hit by a car? 🙈,

warning this is VERY self indulgent. but i make it as reader friendly as possible. (not general descriptions of body, skin color, or a random fucking name)

tdlr: watch jade spiral el oh el

randomly one day while in town. no big pivoting place like a café or bookstore. not a too unique place like a record shop either.

nope. it’s on the corner of the street.

it was hot out, jade noted uncomfortably while floyd groaned to azul about grabbing another ice cream cone to (and verbatim) ‘beat the heat’

but azul told him to get over himself and to suck it up.

the heat of the spring day seemed to be only affecting the mermen, as you seemed to be fine. the heat the furtherest thing from your mind as you scowl at your phone.

you were wearing headphones, yet your hair was styled in a way to put some of your front pieces in front of your face.

you wore a tight brown top that hugged your upper body. it’s color played a critical role in your darker clothing ensemble.

there was a chunky, studded belt that lined your waist. it so easily contrasted with your body shape as the baggy pants you wore also swam on you. he could miss that you were drowning in the washed denim you wore.

there was a dark jacket that snaked around your elbows, exposing your skin to the spring sun. and jade is one to testify, that no matter what season twisted wonderland seemed to be in, the sun was always scorching.

he almost scowled thinking about sunset savanah and the scalding sands. mentally noting to never travel to either places in the fear of drying out.

painting a blue and dark oasis, his mind started playing tricks on him. almost had him take up the habit that belonged to his brother; deciding what sea creature you were

not floyd enough…

🐬seconding what sea creature you were‼️

normally yes, he wouldn’t partake in this unusual habit and leave that part of character reading to floyd.

yet jade made a special exception for you. i mean, could anyone blame him??

your clothes [besides your top] were swimming on you. he thought about you being an octopus with how puffy your pants made you look. but a single thought of you and azul made him throw the thought out quicker than he could swim.

he thought about a pufferfish, a jellyfish, sevens, even a shrimp. yet none of them seemed to stick.

…he paused…

what if-

he shook his head hurriedly. his eyes darted from your huffing, distracted figure and to the bickering of azul and floyd.

still about ice cream. jade could almost chuckle as the two became more mob-esque. floyd’s towering stature bending awkwardly as he sneered at azul. props to azul for not even twitching, as the silver haired male grew increasingly aggressive at his twin. finger pointed so straight he swear the two human bones would snap in on themselves.

his inner voice giggled at the imaginative scene.

albeit the public disturbance, jade was relieved that no one had caught him slipping. there were only a handful of times where jades more… eel like mannerisms would seep in.

where he’d get the rhythmic itch to… observe. he quite enjoyed it too, so he never quite minded that pesky itch. at most he used it for… say…

motivation :)

his head slowly turned back to the street. his eyes, ever slower, were back on you.

yet he quickly snapped them to the car racing intersection when he noticed a change.

you were listening.

your bulky headphones were ever so slight pushed backwards, taking a few strands of your hair with it.

sure, you two werent standing side by side, as he was closer to the street than you were. but there were… unforeseen and secret advantages mermen had that they kept secret from pesky humans.

i mean, did they really think they would hand over every little thing about them to some lesser race? as bad as it sounds, it’s just the truth. scientifically speaking, it’s facts!

jade would wonder how his classmates would realize that when his vision was enhanced, it was enhanced.

yes as an eel is eyes are less than… savvy, but as a merman compared to a human? you’re joking right.

so even from his cowards facing position he was able to watch you comfortably. the slight twitches in your frown, your softening eyebrows, your less aggressive swipes at your phone-

ah, you were looking for music.

you were scrolling mindlessly through different artists. album covers blurred in with each other as you skipped skipped skipped.

he fought back a smirk- you must be a very picky person.

there was a noise behind him. you whipped your head back as jade watched you watch the scene unfold. floyd, was looking away sheepishly, well, as sheepishly as his wolfish smile would let him appear. azul was gasping, huffing as steam seemed to be blowing from his ears. he looked like the kettle heartslabyul’s dorm leader would use for his little tea parties.

jade hadn’t realized he tuned into this weeks episode of looney tunes, yet he met floyd’s unwavering eyes as azul chewed him out for- breaking his phone.

there was a silent pause between the two. floyd’s smile faltered as jade smiled.

jade knew he picked correctly as floyd’s eyes seemed to snap to yours. making quick and intense eye contact with you, jade saw you flinch from the scrutinizing stare of motlen gold and empty matter.

flinching back, jade heard you curse harshly under your breathe, head shooting down to your phone again, thumb scrolling mindlessly on the dark device. it occasionally lit up, receptive of your touches. only a few turn on’s did you decide to turn on your phone again to continue music browsing.

you finger stopped on a band.

he couldn’t be more elated if he tried. you had picked his favorite band! matchbox!

he couldn’t hide the slight twitches in his right leg as he saw you browsing the songs. from your profile it seemed like you liked a number of their songs- 6 total.

clicking your liked songs from them, he saw your pointer finger trail down the list of names. he could almost hear the internal squabble in your mind.

jade took this as an intermission. looking back to the street in front of him, the light was still green and the orange hand was still glowing strong. there was another group of walkers on the other side of the street.

a family of 5, two older couples, and a lone teenage boy. well, that’s what he deciphered him as as he looked at the hoodie clad male.

black hoodie over his tall stature, he didn’t have the pride of a man, but jade could tell he had the arrogance of an adolescent.

he took a deep breathe, closing his eyes slightly as he felt the quips of wind rush past him as the roaring of cars went and came. if he pretended enough, he could pretend the flashes of wind were from the deep sea currents, that the zooming of cars was from the low vibrancy tumble of the currents.

why does he feel so home sick all of the sudden?

steeping back a bit after a particularly fast gist of wind, jade was now standing side by side with you.

almost naturally he looked at you again. there was an urge to remember what you were wearing. brown topless top and black baggy jeans.

his eyes widened slightly. oh

his mind started to jumble. he was full on staring at you, you no doubly noticing his gaze kept yours glued to your phone.

his thoughts were too fast for him to grasp. to fast for him to make sense of. there was no rhyme or reason to the chaotic mess of thought. there were a few times his english thoughts would switch with his mother tongue.

just as his mind was a mess, jade had no doubt that his facial expression exposed everything going on with him.

there was a thundering voice, one that sounded so familiar… yet unlike the usual calm collectiveness of it, the familiar soft lull… had gained a friend

talk

“sun killer” his mouth blurted out so fast he couldn’t help the hand that reflexively snapped towards his mouth. slanted eyes widened as he tensed.

your body slowly moved to face him, but only slightly as you were still on-guard, still cautious about this strangers- his fist clenched at his side- no stop this foolish thought.

he tried reasoning with the overwhelm.

though once his eyes met yours…

that was when you both acknowledged each other for the first time

that was when his mind went silent. like a conductor holding the orchestra. the audience gripping their seats, teetering in anticipation as they waited impatiently for the next musical feast.

your mouth gaped open, once, twice, as you struggled to find a way to address the stranger.

you head shot to look across the street, so did jades.

yet when jade looked back, he only saw your back scurry away from him as the intersection became clear, and the white man started walking.

he stood there, limbless as you moved your headphone roughly back on your ear. you picked at the wrist holding your phone for a second. undressing your wrist and your phone of the brown hair tie, you brought it to your other wrist, switching your phone too.

he lost you when the other group started walking, covering your retreating form almost perfectly.

his right leg’s muscle surged with longing, step foward, it seemed to tell him. use me it whispered, use me to catch up.

a hand slammed onto his shoulder. the hairs on his body standing on edge as his widened eyes snapped to- floyd.

his body didn’t ease, if anything it got stiffer at his twins touch. floyd’s mouth started to open slowly but jade’s head was already burning back towards the street.

eyes scanning every direction before he found you once again. you had already safely made it to the other side. body erect like a hare on alert, staring at the eyes of its predator- the wolf

like a hare, you didn’t bother staying to find out just what his intentions were as you already turned to make your leave.

the group of people sauntered in front of him.

he was once again in the kelp forest of home. in the tall, slimy mid section of the ocean. it’s murky waters were an excellent source of coverage and ambush hunter like him needed. the haunting environment eased his soul, he claimed whenever floyd questioned him about his frequent haunt.

floyd never stepped foot in those med section waters. because as much as floyd is his brother, and hade is his… they were both still male eels.

his body consciously bucked from floyd’s grip.

the thickness of the kelp jungle’s tendrails surrounded him, brushed against him, whispered to him inaudible words. secrets no doubt. there would always be a secret or two wrapped in the leaves gentle yet suffocating embraces.

his inner conscious giggled at that thought.

conscious? was that what this was?

the kelp purred. leaving swaying in the oceans rocking waves.

the kelp started to thin out- you

his eyes widened as he was thrusted out of the kelp jungle and stepped foward-

“jade”

a voice screamed at him, at his ear as a sudden ringing noise filled his head. a sudden static-y feeling throughout his body drowned the voice out.

it pushed him. again is body staggered foward, leg doing little to catch him.

his eyes weren’t on the street, they were on your disappearing figure as you walk away on the parallel side walk.

a car rushed past his face.

“ja

then a honk

then a crushing weight on his shoulder.

with a labored gasp his body trembled. his legs couldn’t stand on their own as his upper body sagged between two hard walls.

“jade! what are you doing? you almost got hit” the wall- azul yelled, spit flying from his lips as his free hand waved around just to show how upset he was.

the wall on his other side- his brother floyd, remained silent. jade didn’t bear look at his brother.

azul’s scodling seemed to slowly die out as the dorm head realized his vice dorm head wasn’t even listening to him. wasn’t even acknowledging him in the slightest.

an irritated sigh leaves his lips. azul thought it better to use a different approach at getting information from his shocked friend.

yet the moment he opened his mouth, floyd decided it was his round for questioning. yet azul didn’t seem to have the security clearance to understand the insides of their code.

“…kinda reminded me of a grouper, don’t you think?”

jade looked to his brother. his heart was hammering against his ribcage painfully. knots were being tightened in his gut painfully. his thoughts were racing painfully. everything about you was painful so far.

and yet, there was a dopey twitch to his lips, an w relax of his brow as he answered his brother.

“it appears they do…”

my honest reaction after writing jade get so overwhelmed by being in the same proximity of reader for the first time that he almost gets hit by a car 🤭 :

by the way… the bond already snapped in place 😻

it snapped in when you got to night raven actually!!

jade just doesn’t understand this! (none of them will actually cause they’re all emotional disturbed in their own ways. each n every one of them)

who knew meeting your predestined mate was this painful? i did. who knew that years of your body rejecting a bond, only to suddenly have a reciprocating bond out of no where…. your body would need time to adjust? i did

welcome! to twst boys being fucking whipped- so whipped in fact that they end up a little… yandere

*i gasp!* *i giggle* *imagine me making that face ^^^^

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kytrisz · 9 months

Text

Are you happy? | Matt Smith

| pairing. matt smith x reader

It's been a while since you and Matt, your boyfriend for quite some time now, spent time together. Due to his project, which has kept him gone for nearly 6 months, and your hectic schedule, the two of you have had little time for each other. So being together now is quite a new fresh air in the relationship.

Both of you book a stone house in Italy countryside to get away from everything else, as he said "everything felt too fast-paced", which you have the same sentiment with.

During your stay, you did a lot of activities together to compensate for the time being apart for so long. You went for a walk in the forest, had picnics in the backyard, gazed at the stars at night, and even rode your bikes down the street. Everything felt peaceful, everything is perfect,

well almost...

You're currently laying on the couch after returning from dinner at a restaurant near the house that Matt reserved for you. It was a great spot, with delicious cuisine and beautiful scenery. Making your heart thump lightly when you realize how well Matt knows you.

You snuggled against his chest, listening to his breathing and the beat of his heart, while his fingers write things in your back you don't understand.

As you were about to slumber way to sleep, you felt him grumble as if he was saying something.

"...hmmm?" you asked, carefully placing your chin on his chest as you looked at him, more like catching him staring at you. Where his chocolate eyes are fixed on you and nothing else. Making you feel butterflies on the inside. He always never fails to make you feel special, as if you're a treasure he wants to keep.

"Did you say something?" you asked softly, staring at him with wonder.

It took a minute of silence and staring before Matt let out a chuckle, putting his hand on your head to caress it, "How long have we been together, love?"

"It's almost what, 3 years now I guess," you murmured, then realizing, "3 years... Matt!" you cried, surprised at how long you and Matt had been together. Startling him, who is below you.

"We've been together for 3 years! 3 years! I felt so old now," you chuckle.

"Shouldn't I be the one saying that?" Matt jokes, after all, you guys have quite a big age gap. And it's no secret among the general public, who are constantly making comments about it.

Letting out a small chuckle you lay again to snuggle to his neck and mumbled "That's true", laughing alongside him.

A moment of silence enters again, only your breathing and his can be heard in the room along with the two hearts beating in sync.

As your breathing turns to shallow, and your eyelids begin to drop, you felt yourself detach from reality and began to fall asleep.

But just as your eyes were about to close, you heard Matt utter something that threw you off guard.

"Are you happy to be with me, love?"

"... "

When you didn't answer, Matt glances down to give you a soothing smile. "You don't have to answer, my love," he sighed, but you can hear the shakiness in his voice.

Staring at his chocolate orbs as if looking for an answer, you finally replied "Sometimes..."

You watched him arch his brow, looking a bit confused but mostly bothered by your answer. He may not say it, but you know he always beat himself up for not being present in your relationship.

"Because you annoy me a lot," you said seriously but failed as he poked your sides and laughed.

"But seriously, I do." fixing your gaze on his "I'm glad I spent my last three years with you."

"Why?"

"Hmm, what do you mean why?" A bit confused by his question.

"Why are you happy being with me?"

You saw in his eyes filled with contemplation, bother if he should take back what he said.

Sighing, you pull yourself up and straddle his waist. "Well, I'm happy being with you because even though we're miles apart, you never fail to make me feel alone. You always try your best to call me and even text me when you don't need to. You even do things that you don't even like because you know it makes me happy! But do you know what truly makes me happy?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm happy because you love me," you grinned, leaning forward to touch his forehead and caress his cheeks, "and I'm happy because I love you"

And through your answer, Matt smiled at you with contentment, and all the worries you saw in his eyes finally washed away.

"I love you so much, Matt, more than you can imagine," you said solemnly.

Looking at you adoringly, he replied, "And I love you so," placing a hand on your head to lower you and plant his lips into yours.

At that moment, time appeared to stop and the world faded away, leaving just the two of you in your little universe with your hearts dancing to the rhythm of their symphony.

#matt smith #matt smith x reader #matt smith x you #matt smith fanfic #matt smith fanfiction #fluff #oneshot

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nicksbestie · 2 months

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hi as of like yesterday yr requests are still open so i hope this isn’t a bother ! but anyway i was hoping to see some caregiver!reader + agere!johnnie ? preferably gnc reader but fem would also be okay ( whatever prior relationship you want :] ) don’t have many ideas for plot aside from maybe johnnie has had a bad day/is really stressed out so he kinda starts isolating himself, which reader respects but is also really worried about him :( so after a while reader uses maybe like a spare key to go into johnnie’s room and at first it just seems like he’s just upset but as reader starts trying to get johnnie to open up and trying to comfort him, he regresses which makes him more upset/panicky. whether reader has prior knowledge of regression is up to you but in general they’re just really sweet and supportive trying to calm johnnie down <3 maybe they eat dinner/reader feeds johnnie, and watch a movie/cartoon while cuddling ? ( little spoon johnnie ofc ) anyways feel free to add or take away anything i just want johnnie to be taken care of and as an agere i am totally projecting lol

Secrets - Johnnie Guilbert

Summary : Johnnie's biggest secret is exposed without him being ready, but it goes better than he thinks it will.

Pairing : Johnnie Guilbert/Reader (romantic)

Warnings : descriptions of mental health issues, depression, and isolation

Word Count : 1541

A/N : This is an age regression fic, which is purely safe for work and innocent. Any hate/disrespect towards me, my work, or readers, will not be tolerated.

Everyone has secrets. Some of them are terrible ones, skeletons in your closet, ones that would ruin many people’s lives should they escape out into the public. Others are small and simple, things they just like to keep to themselves, and wouldn’t hurt anyone if other people knew, they just don’t want them to be everyone’s business. Some people keep secrets to protect themselves because they would be embarrassed about it if anyone found out. Everyone keeps secrets, and sometimes they’re revealed at the wrong time. Johnnie had secrets, and he was in no way prepared for his biggest one to be exposed to anyone, especially not you, but sometimes life goes in ways that we just can’t predict.

Johnnie had been struggling a lot lately. That wasn’t a secret, and although you knew about it, you didn’t pressure him very much. He wasn’t the type to open up when he was overly pushed about whatever was wrong, and you wanted him to feel safe and comfortable coming to you when he was ready, and not before that. But that didn’t mean that you weren’t concerned, because you most definitely were. This bad spell for him was bordering on being one of his worst ones ever, and you were about to step in, because you couldn’t stand to see him hurting on his own any longer, even if that was what he told you he wanted.

Johnnie had begun to isolate himself for almost every hour of the day, only exiting his room to eat and use the bathroom. He didn’t talk much to you out loud, texting instead, as it took much less energy out of him to take that route. He didn’t like to talk about it, despite knowing that he most definitely needed to. You hated how he could be so self destructive, but you knew that you did the exact same thing when you felt the way that he did. So, you respected his space and always let him have it when he asked for it. However, it normally didn’t last this long, thus feeling the massive worry that encased your mind.

After a couple more hours, you continued to let your worry grow, but you decided to do something about it. You hated the fact that you were about to ignore the boundaries that Johnnie had put into place, but you were seriously concerned, and you hoped that he would be able to understand and forgive you should he be upset with your decision. You grabbed the spare key that unlocked all the doors in the house, kept in the kitchen just in case of emergencies, and gently knocked on his bedroom door. You weren’t going to just barge in, you wanted to give him the chance to open it himself. When he didn’t reply, you softly called out to him, telling him that you were going to open the door. He didn’t argue, so you did just that.

Walking into his room, you noticed that the blinds were closed, the lights were off, and he was quietly laying in his bed, staring at the wall. You immediately laid down next to him, letting him curl up next to you. You noticed the stained tear tracks on his cheeks, your heart breaking for him as he simply laid there. You let the both of you cuddle in silence, not wanting this to be a heartbreaking moment for the both of you, so you didn’t break the silence for a while. You knew that you should probably talk about what was going on, but the moment was so peaceful that you didn’t want to say anything. You both laid there quietly for about half an hour, taking in the comfort of the other’s presence, before you said anything.

“We should talk about this, baby. It’s getting worse this time.”

You could feel him shake his head against your chest.

“No. I don’t want to talk.”

“Honey, it’s important-”

“No!”

Woah. He very rarely snapped at you. He had almost never snapped at you, especially not when he was feeling like this. But, in all fairness, you had pushed him a little bit. You could feel the tears from his eyes soaking your shirt, and you decided to not speak any more for a little bit. You gently pulled his face up, wiping his tears away with the soft pads of your thumbs, pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead, brushing his hair out a bit with your fingers. You noticed that his eyes were widened more, much more glassy, and you definitely were concerned about it, but you brushed it off to the tears causing it.

You were more surprised when he pulled away from you, as he had never done that. You gently reached out to try and cuddle him again, but you noticed that he wouldn’t even look at you. He seemed to be panicking about something, and you couldn’t figure out what it was. You weren’t upset with him, but from the anxiety radiating off of his body, you could tell that he probably felt like you were. So, you immediately spoke up to try and help him recognize the fact that he was always safe and loved with you.

“Love, what’s wrong? It’s all going to be okay.”

You were now completely confused, as the second that you spoke, your boyfriend burst into tears. He seemed to be absolutely inconsolable, crying nearly at the top of his lungs and clutching the squishmallow on his bed tightly between his arms. You didn’t know what else to do besides just hug him, whispering comforting words as you told him that everything was going to work out, and that you were here for him. It wasn’t until he looked up at you with the same glassy-eyed look as earlier and spoke a few words when you realized what was going on.

When a choked out “I sorry” left his lips, you put together the look in his eyes, and unexpected crying, and the clutched stuffie, and immediately realized what was happening. Your boyfriend had slipped right into his littlespace, a littlespace that you were completely unaware of, and was absolutely distraught. You had been a caregiver in a previous relationship, and you quickly controlled your shocked face, bringing him as close to you as possible and gently stroking through his hair.

“It’s okay, baby. It’s okay. You’re safe, angel, nothing to be sorry for. I’ve got you, you’re going to be alright.”

It took a lot of repetitive words and soft praises for Johnnie to relax, his crying eventually slowing when he realized that you weren’t upset with him, and that you were still there and still loving him despite his newfound headspace. He wrapped himself back around you, seeming to become a very quiet little. You were more than excited to get to know him in his headspace, so excited to get to love and spoil a little one, as it had been a long time. Less than an hour later, the two of you were still curled up next to each other, you simply hugging your little boy and whispering sweet nothings to him as he relaxed. You both enjoyed the quality time, and as it turns out, Johnnie is a very silent little, despite when he’s not upset. It wasn’t for another half an hour or so that you moved, and you probably wouldn’t have moved at all had it not been for Johnnie’s stomach growling.

You held his hand as you walked to the kitchen, calling him the most adorable as he rubbed his eyes with a fist. You put some chicken nuggets in the oven for him, before you went to the bathroom and you helped him remove the makeup that he’d put on that morning. He hadn’t gone anywhere, but he put it on to cover the dark circles under his eyes. You were gentle but bubbly, and you noticed that your little loved to laugh, and giggled at every funny face you made at him. Dinner went quite smoothly, him eating all of it, which absolutely warmed your heart, as he hadn’t been eating much lately due to his depressive slump.

Little Johnnie seemed to love food, and you were grateful for that, because you didn’t want dinner time to cause him to be upset again. After he had finished eating, you got him a popsicle from the freezer, wrapped it in a paper towel so his hands didn’t get cold, and tucked him in on the couch while you cleaned up the plate and put it into the dishwasher. He was wrapped up in a blanket, cuddled with his stuffie, and you sat down next to him as soon as you were done. You gently tapped through channels and shows as you waited for your little one to pick a cartoon he’d like to watch, finally settling on “Spongebob”, and he immediately wrapped himself back up in your arms.

He’d been in a dark episode for a while, but now, it seemed like he was able to see the light at the end of it, and you couldn’t wait to be here to help him through it all.

~ taglist : @jake-and-johnnies-slut @elliem505 @gvf23 @ilydeaky @maryx2xx @oobleoob @aemrsy @jasperthefriendlyghostt @707xn

~ if you'd like to be added to my taglist, click here!

~ my inbox is open, come chat!

#johnnie guilbert #johnnie guilbert fanfic #johnnie guilbert x reader #johnnie guilbert fic #johnnie guilbert fanfiction #johnnie and jake #fanfic #jake webber fluff #jake webber fanfic #jake webber fanfiction #jake webber #jake and johnnie #johnnie guilbert age regression #sfw fic #johnnie guilbert sfw #caregiver johnnie guilbert #johnnie guilbert agere

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s0urw00lf · 11 months

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can you make fluff alphabet for klaus mikaelson

Fluff alphabet - Klause mikaelson

A = Affection (how affectionate is he?) klaus is a big ball of affection when it comes to you. It’s actually quite funny to see the big bad klaus mikaelson all fluffy

B = body (what’s his favorite body part of yours) i think Klaus loves your stomach, because its a way he could always be touching you. Like he’ll have his hand on your stomach in public to make sure you don’t get separated

C = cuddle (how do they like to cuddle) clause loves holding you. So any way he could hold you would be his favorite.

D = dance (how do they dance with you) Klaus having lived through so many generations of dance would teach you any one you wanted to know, and he’s so elegant with it.

E = emotions (how do they process their emotions around you) Klaus prefers to be around you all times of the day, you keep his emotions at bay, but when he really needs it you just sit and listen to him rant as he paints or while you run your fingers through his hair

F = family (how is he around your family) he hates your family and they hate him all except your little brother/sister. So most of the time he’d just spend time with them and make sure so slightly spoil them, much to your dismay

G = gratitude (how great full are they for you) Klaus is so grateful for you, he loves how gentle you are with him, even knowing the beast he can be at times.

H = honesty (do they have secrets) funnily enough Klaus has no secrets from you, you’d known a lot about him before you’d even met him. They were mostly bad things, so he’d decided there was no point in hiding anything.

I = inspiration (do you change them in any way) you inspire Klaus to be a better person, not for himself but you. He’d hate himself if an enemy of his decided to go after you to get to him

J = jealousy (do they get jealous easily) yes. Klaus is the king of jealousy, he knows you love him but it doesn’t stop the nagging thought that maybe one day you’d have had too much of him and leave him stranded

K = kiss (where is their favorite place to kiss you) he loves to kiss your shoulders, seeing as your always standing in front of him like his queen and that’s the easiest accessible way to kiss you.

L = love confession (how did they confess their love for you) you had to force the confession out of him. You’d grown tired of his mind games, and told him that if he didnt fess up you’d leave him forever. That forced it right out of him.

M = marriage (does they want to get married) i don’t know, i think he would just so you’d have his last name, but other than that I don’t think he’d really care

N = nicknames (what do they call you) love, darling, Gorgeous, beautiful…

O = open (are they open about things) Klaus is very open with you about even his younger days, his family, and his father

P = patience (are they patient with you) Klaus is extremely patient with you, unless your trying to tick him off, then he plays right into your game

Q = quirks (random ability they have that beneficial to the relaxation ship) Klaus has so many abilities its unfair. The enhanced hearing/strength/speed/compelling plus his painting ability

R = romance (how romantic are they) again having lived through multiple generations, Klaus has seen his fair share of romance. So yes he is very romantic

S = security (do the provide safety for you) come on now. This is the original hybrid were talking about. Your more safe than the king of England

T = tender (how soft are they with you) Klaus is incredibly soft and cuddly. He loves you too much to even think about using the strength of a normal human let alone his vampire strength

U = upkeep (how clean are they) klaus is very clean, and extremely well kept. I mean his clothing choices should say it all

V = vulnerability (can they allow themselves to be vulnerable with you) he loves that he can be vulnerable with you, and not have to hide his feelings

W = wholesome (do they do little sweet things) Klaus would do anything for you if you’d ask. But he makes sure to keep up with the little things. Like bringing you flowers, or opening your doors, guiding you up/down stairs.

Y = yearning (how do they act when they yearn to be in your presence) he acts like a complete baby, you can’t count the amount of times Rebekah has called annoyed over Klaus’s whining

Z = zen (what makes them feel calm) klaus likes going to a nearby waterfall with you, listening to you talk and the water falling in the background gives him an unexplainable ammount of piece

#klaus mikaelson x reader #klaus mikaelson #elijah mikaelson #klaus mikealson x reader #elijah mikaelson imagine #klaus mikaelson fluff #rebekah mikealson x reader #rebekah mikaelson #kol mikaelson #kol mikealson x reader #stefan salvatore #the original series #the vampire diaries #damon salvatore x reader #damon salvarote #stefan salavatore x reader #elena gilbert

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formula-hamilton · 1 year

Text

Antarctica (Lewis Hamilton x Reader)

Lewis Hamilton x Reader

Summary: You and Lewis have been dating for some months when suddenly the video of him in Antarctica with a girl on his lap emerges.

Word count: 3.8k

Warnings: Angst, stupid Lewis, swearing, mentions of cheating, but not really (no real infidelity), fluff.

A/N: I wrote this because I really wanted to read this type of fic as soon as I saw the hot tub video. If anyone has written anything similar, please tag me because I live for these kind of fics and I would love to read it. Also I obviously don’t know what went down in Antarctica, so this is purely fiction. No hate to the hot tub girl.

Stupid. So stupid.

That was how you felt as you sat at your desk at work staring at your phone. Just almost wanted to roll your eyes at your stupidity. Instead you closed your eyes and tried to hold back the tears you felt prickling behind your eyelids.

You were supposed to leave work early this Friday. Lewis was going to fly you out to LA to celebrate his birthday Saturday and then you were going to stay with him for the coming week. He was going to introduce you to his friends. A few you had already met, but he insisted that it was time for you to meet the rest of them.

You’re gonna love them, I just know it.

No need to be nervous about it baby, I’ve told them loads about you and they already love you.

He would always beam with excitement when talking about them. His smile would hold so much pride.

You felt stupid for assuming. For being naïve. You never talked about being exclusive. Meeting friends, meeting family, you assumed that the two of you were serious about each other. That you were on the path to making your relationship official. Sitting at your desk you came to the realization that this thing wasn’t a relationship. It was clearly just a situationship and honestly that wasn’t what you were looking to find yourself in.

Maybe this is how it is dating someone not normal, you thought. Maybe there are different rules to follow. You hadn’t realized this before, but clearly the two of you were living in two different realities.

For Christmas he brought you on his family’s ski trip. Just for a few days as you had your own commitments for the holidays. But he brought you, introduced you to everyone, held your hand in front of his family, kissed you in front of his family, called you his when you were in bed at night. He never called you his girlfriend and that didn’t bother you until now. You didn’t even spare it a thought until now. When you were younger, you and your friends always joked that if you kissed someone in public in daylight, it meant that you were official. If meeting family wasn’t enough to make a relationship official, to make it exclusive, you really didn’t know what it would take.

24 years old. The woman, if you could even call her that, was 24 years old. That was all everyone talked about. Apparently this was not unusual for Lewis. Apparently she was just his type. Young and beautiful and a model. But still, Twitter was going crazy.

Normally you didn’t indulge in gossip surrounding Lewis and F1 in general. You didn’t even seek out this piece of information yourself. Your younger sister sent you the video on Instagram. You almost missed the ending where Lewis sat in the hot tub having the time of his life with someone sitting on his lap.

You wish you could erase it from your brain. Go back to the fantasy in your head. But you couldn’t. Instead you found yourself dug down in a Twitter hole trying to soak in every single detail possible. What stuck to you the most was how they apparently used to see each other in the past. If that wasn’t proof enough, you don’t know what was. You normally thought it was crazy how people found so much information about celebrities. You and Lewis always joked about it. Joked about how the fans would make great detectives. And then you would laugh about how none of them had any clue about the two of you.

You were a very well kept secret. You both liked it that way. It made everything easier. Made the whole “getting to know each other” stage more simple. Obviously, people close to you knew, but the public didn’t. You couldn’t help but wonder if this was part of Lewis’ grand plan. By keeping his flings secret he could have one in every city he visited. Maybe you were just his London bed warmer.

Silly of you to think that dating in your thirties would bring more maturity to the table. Honestly, the men were just as immature and on top of that, they brought all the baggage from shitty relationships in their twenties. For some reason you thought Lewis was different. Your heart ached for him to be different.

You almost jumped out of your chair when you heard a knock on the door. Fuck. You quickly blinked the tears away and sat up straight before calling for the person to enter. Your boss poked his head in.

“I didn’t expect to see you here still, don’t you have a flight to catch?” He asked.

“Yeah, but I have quite a lot of work to do so I think I might just stay a bit longer,” you said while trying to smile without it looking forced. You must have looked weird because he looked worriedly at you. “Really. It’s no trouble. I still have time before I have to leave for the airport, and if not I can always take a later flight.”

“Well, do whatever suits you, but remember to relax during your vacation. You deserve it,” he said while smiling. As he left, you slumped back down in your chair. You looked up at the ceiling while massaging your temples. What the fuck am I gonna do? You thought.

It was clear to you that going to LA wasn’t an option. You didn’t want to continue whatever the two of you had going on. You didn’t want a casual thing. You had even told Lewis that. Told him that you were finally content with your career and was ready to pursue a serious relationship. You had shared your thoughts and your dreams for the future. You thought that he wanted the same things even though you hadn’t explicitly talked about in the context of your relationship.

You knew that you were falling for him. You thought that he was falling for you as well. Stupid of you to assume when none of you had said the words.

Your phone buzzed on the table. It was a text from him. You quickly opened it.

Have a safe flight baby. Looking forward to seeing you again x

Your eyes narrowed as you read the text again and again. Surely he must have seen the things being said about him in Antarctica. Or someone must have told him. His lack of explanation annoyed you immensely. It proofed to you that he didn’t even view it as mistake as you had maybe hoped he would. Clearly you were the one on the wrong page.

You wiped a few angry tears that had escaped and typed out a reply.

I have decided against going. Sorry for the late call, but I’ve realized we clearly want different things and I think it would be a mistake going knowing it would just postpone the inevitable. I hope you enjoy your birthday. All the best.

As you hit send you noticed your shaking hands. You hastily turned off your phone and shut down your computer before grabbing your coat and bag. You almost ran out the office and decided to walk home instead of taking the tube. The thought of the tube right now was almost enough to send you into a full blown panic attack. You needed fresh air and to clear your head.

As you shut the door behind you to your flat, you almost stumbled over your packed suitcase. “What a fucking shitty day, for fuck’s sake,” you mumbled to yourself, as you pushed the suitcase away and kicked off your shoes. Finally, you reached your destination, your bed. You told yourself that you would spent the weekend indulging in self-pity and then Monday you would try to find something to do for the rest of your stupid work break.

But of course the tears wouldn’t come now that you were finally in the safety of your own home. You decided that they needed a little push and therefore turned on your phone again and found a playlist on Spotify named “Sad songs”. Perfect, hopefully that would get the job done. The messages popping in on your phone didn’t go unnoticed by you, but you chose to ignore them. Instead you opted to go to Instagram again to speed up the pity party.

After taking a quick scroll through her Instagram you decided to spare yourself for further damages. There was no need to start comparing the two of you, that would only make matters worse. This was about Lewis. It wasn’t her fault that he couldn’t commit. Whilst putting down your phone, you finally felt the tears making their way. As you sobbed your way to sleep that night, you kept wishing that this would all just be a bad dream.

When you woke up the next morning you had an awful headache from clenching your jaw too tight all night. Rolling to your side, you grabbed your phone. 8AM the display read. You’d slept for almost 12 hours. You couldn’t ignore all the notifications anymore. You quickly answered your sister that you were okay and that you had ended things with Lewis. Some of your friends had texted you and wished you a nice trip. You chose to ignore those messages. You would fill them in at a later time. Lastly, you got to Lewis’ texts. He had also called you numerous times.

Please pick up the phone

Has something happened? I’m really worried. Pls call me

I just wanna talk to you to make sure you’re alright. I’m sure we can fix it baby

I just saw the video. I’m so sorry, it isn’t what it looks like. Just let me explain

Nothing happened with her, I promise you. I would never do that. Just pick up the phone so we can talk

You tossed your phone to the bottom of your bed. You were so angry. Both at him and at yourself. You were angry about his excuses. You had heard them all before and in the end it always turned out to be true. Where there’s smoke there’s fire, your past experiences told you. You were angry at yourself for trusting him, for letting him into your life. For hoping that what you had was genuine. It had all been too good to be true.

As the days went by, you got better and better. You were hoping to book a vacation for somewhere sunny, but they were all too expensive because it was so last minute. Instead you found yourself content with living in your bed and catching up on all your favorite tv shows. Lewis kept calling and you kept ignoring his calls. You almost felt bad about it because of his birthday Saturday, but then you decided he could fuck off. If this had affected his birthday it was his own fault. Monday afternoon you were dozing off while watching the newest season of Grey’s Anatomy. Suddenly the doorbell woke you up. You hurriedly wiped some droll from your chin and tried to fix your hair in a ponytail before waddling to the door.

As you opened the door Lewis appeared with the biggest bouquet of flowers you had ever seen in your life. You almost wanted to shut the door on his face and just go back to sleep. As if he could read your mind he stepped forward just enough for you to be unable to close the door.

“Please let me in baby. Let me explain everything,” he quietly pleaded. He looked like a wounded puppy. Dark circles under his big sad eyes. You had never seen him like this before. Always happy and positive Lewis. Sometimes too positive, you had thought before. Seeing him like this made you realize that you’d rather see him disgustedly positive, than this sad ever again.

Deep in your mind you had a feeling he might show up like this. You were now wishing that you had just picked up the phone so you could be spared this interaction with him. Nevertheless, you gestured for him to enter your home. You noticed how he glanced at the forgotten suitcase in the entryway.

“So, explain away,” you told him as you both stood in your living room. You with crossed arms and him with that ridiculously big bouquet in his arms.

“I’m really sorry about that video,” Lewis began slowly, as if he wanted to test the waters. You scoffed and cut him off.

“You’re sorry about the video? What the fuck Lewis? Did you expect me to not find out or what? Or did you think I wouldn’t care?” You angrily said. “Fuck the video, I’m glad I saw it. I probably never would have known if your friend wasn’t stupid enough to share it. I’m glad that guy was so stupid. At least he spared me wasting any more time on you, on us. I can’t believe I thought there was an us.” You felt the tears were about to appear once again and wiped them away with your shaking hands before it got too bad.

“You know what? I kept feeling stupid and angry at myself for thinking we were something real. But I realized I’m in my full right to feel angry at you and not at myself. I don’t know what delusional celebrity world you’re living in, but in the real world, stuff don’t work like that. Bringing someone round for Christmas kinda means that you are not fucking some Instagram model the week after in Antarctica!” You yelled at ham. You had never yelled at him before and Lewis wished for you to never do it ever again. He hadn’t understood the seriousness of the whole situation before now.

“I, I didn’t. I didn’t sleep with her,” Lewis said with eyes so wide it looked like they might pop out. If it wasn’t such and awful situation you might have laughed. He took a few breaths and seemed to collect his thoughts.

“I know what it looks like, but nothing happened. She sat on my lap because there wasn’t other seats. I didn’t think, we were all drinking, and I didn’t think anything about it. I can see now how it looks from the outside, but that was the closest I was to her the whole week. I know that people are saying the she was my guest, but I didn’t invite her for the trip. She was with some other guy. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings by pushing her away. I know you probably know about our history and I didn’t wanna be an asshole to her, but it was wrong of me to have her sitting on my lap like she was my girl.” The tears welled in Lewis’ eyes. He felt absolutely awful for the way he had made you feel.

“I understand if it’s over between us, but it’s very important for me that you know I didn’t cheat on you. I know that’s your worst fear in a relationship and I would never ever do that to you,” Lewis finished and tried to make eye contact with you. Tried to get a sense of what was going on in your head. You looked down at your feet and closed your eyes. Trying to think of what to say. What to believe. You wanted to believe ham, but a part of you wasn’t ready to let go of the doubt.

“You looked very comfortable with her sitting there. Very happy.” You finally looked up and your eyes met. Only for a second though. This time Lewis was the one to look down.

“I wasn’t. I was happy with my friends, but I wasn’t happy with her sitting there. As soon as there was a free seat I pushed her off me and she sat there instead. I am so sorry that I let her sit there in the first place, but I promise you, nothing more happened between us.” Lewis felt his tears well over and run down his cheeks. He tried to wipe them with his shoulder seeing as his hands were full, but it didn’t really work.

“Bringing you to meet my family was so special to me. I haven’t introduced anyone to my family in years. This isn’t something I just do with anybody. Since we met in September you have become such an important part of my life and I haven’t opened my heart to anyone like this before. I’m so sorry for hurting you and making you think you’re stupid. I’m the only one stupid here. This wasn’t how I wanted to tell you, but I’m in love with you. I’m so sorry that these are the circumstances I’m telling you under, but you deserve to know, ” Lewis looked in your eyes and tried to read your feelings. His eyes were filled with hope. You just stared at him while nibbling on your bottom lip and he couldn’t decipher what you were thinking. He decided to break the silence.

“These are for you,” he said while handing you the flowers. “I hope that you can find it in yourself to forgive me, but I’m gonna leave you to it. Once again, I just wanna say how sorry I am.” As you stood there with the bouquet, Lewis slipped out of your living room and out of your flat. Out of your life, just as you had wanted.

You stood and watched the flowers in front of you. Thoughts running wild in your head. Thoughts about how people always brought baggage from previous relationships. You never thought it applied to you. Yes, Lewis had made a mistake, but you didn’t have any reason to not believe his words. He hadn’t given you any reason to believe that he was like your exes. It wasn’t right of you to let past trust issues follow you into this thing with him. You had finally made a decision.

The flowers got thrown on the table and you ran to the suitcase in the entryway. Zipping it open, you threw the clothes on the floor until you finally found what you were looking for. A little box wrapped in green gift wrap with small bulldogs on it, tied up with little gold bow. You slipped on some sandals and ran down the stairs. The cold January air hit you hard as you ran to the street. You were only wearing sweats and a t-shirt. You looked around you, trying to search for Lewis. Hoping he hadn’t already left. You jogged down the street and frantically tried to see if you could spot him.

As you crossed the street, you finally spotted his car. Parked, just a couple of cars in front of you. You let out a breath of relief and slowly walked towards it. As you got closer you could see Lewis sitting in the driver’s seat with his head in his hands. It was obvious that he was crying and you felt a deep sting in your chest. Carefully, you knocked on the window to the passenger seat, trying not to startle him. You didn’t succeed as he jumped slightly in his seat. When he looked at you, you smiled softly and give him a small wave. He leaned over and pulled the handle on the door for you.

As you sat down just rested your hands in your lap and held the small gift on your thigh.

“I’m in love with you too Lewis. These past four months with you have been the most amazing months in my life. I’ve been so happy, but I’m also so scared to get hurt again. Obviously I don’t approve of the hot tub situation, but I know it was wrong of me to shut you out like that. It’s difficult for me to trust people, but I already trust you so much even though we haven’t known each other for that long.” You took a deep breath. “What I wanna say is, I forgive you and I wanna give us a go. Officially.”

Your hands reached out to Lewis’ face. You wanted to wipe his tears away, to wipe away any sadness he might feel in the future. He looked at you with the kindest eyes you had ever seen in your life. You had never seen eyes as beautiful as his before. As your fingers stroked his cheeks you hesitantly leaned in. Noticing what you were trying to achieve, Lewis did the same and met you halfway. When your lips finally touched after being apart for two weeks, you knew that this was the right decision. One of Lewis’ hands found your hair while the other found your thigh. Nothing had ever felt so right in your life.

Remembering the gift, you pulled away from Lewis.

“I have something for you. For your birthday.” You handed him the small box.

“You shouldn’t have.”

“I know. I wanted to.”

Lewis smiled at your choice of wrapping paper. He carefully tore off the paper. Inside was a small jewelry box. Inside the box was a necklace with a small moon pendant.

“Remember the moon on our second date?” You asked and he nodded, smiling so big he thought his face might break in two.

“Of course I remember baby. The moon was so bright that night. You looked so beautiful in the moonlight.”

“You looked so handsome as well and I remember thinking already back then that you were someone special. Someone I wanted in my life. And then you later told me to always look at the moon when I’m missing you. That that was what you did when you missed me and I just thought that was so sweet. Every time I miss you I look at the moon and I instantly feel better. So I wanted to give you something so you always have me with you when we’re not together. Your own little moon,” you told him while smiling.

“Thank you so much sweetheart, this is the best birthday gift I ever could have wished for,” Lewis beamed while pulling you into his chest. You crawled onto his lap and straddled him. He took your face in his hands. “I really love you,” he told you before connecting his lips to yours once again. His tongue swiped across your bottom lip and you instantly gave him access to your mouth. As you started to grind down on him, he interrupted the two of you.

“Come on, let’s go upstairs again baby. I wanna show you how much I’ve missed you,” Lewis said with a smirk as he pulled you off him. You let out a small whine at the loss of contact, but eventually gave in. You held hands with swinging arms and you both laughed as you ran back to your flat.

#lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton fic #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton x you #f1 fic #f1 one shot #f1 fanfic #lewis hamilton fanfic #hamilton fic #m writes

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londonclubofsherwood · 4 months

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One thing I keep thinking about is because superhero comics are simultaneously niche and cultural icons, the general public understanding of characters can be starkly different to the actual medium. Often this is harmless fun but it can be a problem considering arcs about female and minority characters often suffer in the realm of reprints and adaptations, and therefore never have the same impact on the public consciousness. And I think this explains the erasure of Oracle.

Yes, Killing Joke was misogynistic as hell and as a massive Barbara fan I have serious issues with it. But then what Kim Yale and John Ostrander did with Oracle in year one was moving, beautiful and undeniably feminist. I'm not disabled but I got serious chills reading the story and it is honestly one of my favourite comics. From there she grew to become a staple in the DC universe and helped launch the wildly successful Birds of Prey superhero team.

And she was a disabled hero who was psychologically complex and kickass in a fight. She also was seen as an attractive woman who had love interests like Dick Grayson. She got to train the next generation of Batgirls. As Oracle Babs thrived.

Not to mention according to Scott Peterson's article on DC women kicking ass, the creative team at the time were seeing an overwhelming positive response to Oracle from people who saw themselves on the pages of a superhero comic for the first time thanks to Babs:

"we were the ones getting the mail from disabled fans. We were the ones reading letters about how much Oracle meant to them, how much it meant to see someone in a situation so much like their own, someone who by then had been come such an important part of the DCU, treated with respect and admiration by not only Superman and Black Canary, but by the Batman, a guy who treated pretty much no one with respect." (Scott Peterson, 2011)

But if you look at the mainstream perception, her success is less obvious.

Batgirl has always struggled in adaptations, and Oracle even more so. The versions of Oracle that have been translated onto film and TV haven't caught in public imagination in the same way, to the point she was straight up cut out of the recent Birds of Prey film.

Not to mention Killing Joke is one of the most iconic Batman stories of all time that not only has been reprinted countless times but was one of the select few comic arcs to be adapted into animation. Contrarily, Oracle Year One was reprinted in English once after the original date: the Batgirl 50 years celebration. This collection is expensive and not something you would buy without considerable investment in the Batgirls. It certainly isn't one that would show up if you google 'best batman comics'.

If you see this you understand why people marginally invested in DC mythos considered her return to batgirl was seen by some as a feminist move, rather than an ableist one. Gone were her years of development, one of the most powerful information brokers in DC, and two other beloved Batgirls. And the real insult: killing joke was still canon. Yes, they kept the misogynistic violence and ditched the disability rep and the character growth. And that is despite the fact Killing Joke was made to be part of an else world, not main continuity.

#dc musings #Barbara gordon #batgirl #oracle #dc #dc comics #batman #batfamily #ramblings/meta #hopefully this is something

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deathbxnny · 2 months

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hallo!! platonic welt yang and otto apocalypse with child!herrscher reader? :))

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Hello there, Anon! Thank you for the nice request and I hope you'll like this!<3

Content: Child Herrscher reader, brainwashing?, Otto being a bit evil, small mentions of experimentation, fluff, platonic relationships, probably somewhat ooc?, sfw

Reader has no set pronouns!

((Not fully proofread))

《Welt Yang》

Welt only relaxed around you, once he made sure you weren't hostile or violent. Then, like most kids he seems to randomly stumble upon, he decided to take you under his wing as well, in hopes of making you do good for the world instead of destroying it. Some tried arguing against his decision on this, but he is too stubborn to be swayed rom it. If he believes you can do good, then you will.

With that said, your Herrscher identity is kept a secret from the general public and only very few and selected people know of it. He wants to give you a chance at a normal childhood, perhaps out of guilt for the few Herrscher children and teens who couldn't do the same.

You are therefore treated as a child, something that definitely tires out the older man at times, who has a hard time keeping up with you. You however have made his life brighter and more lively in many ways, which he appreciates more than you'll ever know. That made him spoil you very often with anything you want. He knows it's probably not a good idea, but he just can't help himself. Welt is also very mindful of educating you well and keeping track of your manners. He won't ever scold you too harshly for mistakes, and instead will simply take mistakes as teaching moments with you. Even when you get bored of his lectures easily.

You will never see the brutality of a battlefield either. He absolutely refuses to put you in danger, even if you were strong enough to take care of yourself. He'll protect you and the rest of the world with his life and makes sure you never forget that. He'll always be there for you when you need him.

《Otto Apocalypse》

The chances of you having been essentially kidnapped against your will the moment you awoke as a Herrscher are pretty high. You're scared and confused, but don't worry, Otto is a good guy. Or at least, that's what he tells you. Being so young and naive certainly makes things easier for the man, who's only interest really lies in seeing your abilities potential for his holy cause.

But alas, whilst attempting to brainwash you in believing in whatever he tells you to, he finds himself slowly but surely harboring a soft spot for you. One he stays ignorantly and blissfully unaware of out of fear of becoming too attached. Yet it happens anyways and you take notice in the way he begins to change over time.

He doesn't outright ever conduct experiments on you, or at least not painful ones. Those seem to become more similar to long talking sessions, until he eventually just keeps you at his side as a little "asssisstant". He argues that it's to keep an eye on you easier, but it's fooling no one. Otto also has a habit to spoil you with whatever you want, whenever you did well on a task or test he had set up for you.

Whether or not he sets you out to fight against his enemies is really up to his mood and the circumstance at hand. It's really rare however and often times he just let's you stay next to him, so you can "watch and learn". In reality, you have just become too valuable for him to lose, but that's something he won't ever admit.

-----♡

I thank you once again for the request Anon and hope you liked it!<33

#honkai impact 3rd #honkai x reader #honkai x you #honkai impact fanfic #honkai impact x reader #honkai impact #honkai welt #honkai welt x reader #hi3 welt x reader #hi3 welt #hi3 otto apocalypse #hi3 otto x reader #honkai otto #honkai otto x reader #hi3 #hi3rd #hi3rd x reader

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wavesoutbeingtossed · 2 months

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The whole discourse about the privacy/secrecy/support thing has been sitting with me for a few days (I mean other than it always does to a certain degree) thanks to all the excellent discussion happening and I know I'm not saying anything that hasn't been said a million times before, but I think what we're seeing and what we're going to learn (e.g. from TTPD) is that it wasn't just the support issue, but how it was shown/handled.

We've all gone out of our way to show that introversion =/= lack of support. Someone can be shy, reserved, etc. and still show up for their partner, whether in public or at home. To chalk any of the differences up to the clash between introversion and extroversion is unfair to folks who count themselves among either tbh.

@thisisctrying said something the other day that hit the nail on the head about how if that support had been offered in private, there very well may not have been a Joever to begin with, or at least not at this point in time. (Sorry for loosely paraphrasing, and for namedropping you! Long time listener, first time poster.)

If this were a case where the "shy" partner said, "I am really uncomfortable with the spotlight personally and do not want to court it, but I will support you in your ambitions and offer you whatever you need to make them happen and make the glare bearable," I suspect that would have gone a long way to making Taylor feel seen and comfortable in pursuing her goals in the way that she now has. Again, that might have been more akin to the balance that seemed to have been struck around 2019 from what we can see, but even speaking in a general sense, there are lots of couples out there, celebrity or not, that have similar approaches where there are highly driven people and busy careers involved.

(A famous example being Dolly Parton's marriage. Tbh I know next to nothing about her and Carl, but she's always heralded as an example in this regard, because her husband is famously uncomfortable with the spotlight and hasn't accompanied her to public events in decades, but she's said that she never minded that because that was always work to her, and what was important was that he supported her in pursuing all her career goals and basically ensured she had a place to call home to return to at the end of the day.)

We're kind of in a brave new world with her current relationship because it felt like, at least at the start, we were maybe watching her figure out her boundaries in real time as to what she was comfortable with or not and adjust accordingly. Like so many have said, I fully believe the extreme privacy thing was initially driven by herself and her experiences in 2016, and she needed that quiet time to recover from all of the things and figure out how to exist in the world again.

Stating the obvious, it seemed like eventually privacy was equated with secrecy, turning the relationship and the celebrity into the elephant in the room and something to never be spoken of to the outside world. People are free to choose whatever works best for themselves and their relationships, and for some the separate public lives might work, but the “kept me like a secret but I kept you like an oath” theme is all over her work and it’s clear that it’s a sore spot for her, because she’s been made to feel shame just for the life she leads so many times in the past.

What I’m trying to say is that it’s pretty obvious something Not Great was happening behind the scenes, which didn’t just amount to “she wanted to be a public celebrity and he wanted to be a private hermit.” (Also, in case anyone forgot, this is a person who also chose a public-facing career who also has to engage in press for it, but I digress.) As her career reached new heights post-folklore, if she had the support at home to do all the things without judgment and with encouragement, and in turn offer the same support to her partner, she may have very well lived just fine with that, not unlike Dolly Parton’s case.

By reading between the lines in all the press since, as well as comments on tour and general ~vibes~ with TTPD teasers, it seems like one of the issues was that that was likely not the case. There was all the stuff that we saw — the reticence to acknowledge each other in the media (particularly on one side), the lack of public support even at events at which they were both in attendance for their respective jobs, the great lengths they went to not to be photographed together at events they attended yet no problem taking pictures with other friends and coworkers, the jobs that separated them, the withdrawing from the public even for work accomplishments, etc. Which could all be manageable if a couple chooses to do so together and are not inherently a sign of trouble in themselves.

But what we’re seeing now I think is a reflection of the things we weren’t seeing then, and it seems to indicate some very deep hurt. (I know, call me Captain Obvious.) And like so many have been saying, it feels likely that that part of that hurt is rooted in that very lack of private support where a person would expect it from their partner. Obviously as a Taylor fan blog I’m going to be more inclined to understand her side of a story, but tbh, it’s also because… this is sooooooo common, and something I’ve experienced in my friend group. (@taylortruther is right when she says most breakups are the same one way or another lol.)

One partner is resentful of the other’s success, or resentful that the other’s priorities begin to evolve as new experiences unlock new goals, or feels the other’s ambitions are not worthy of pursuit, and coupled with perhaps their own struggles in the same domain, it’s easy to see where that can chip away at the other partner’s morale and faith in the relationship. I know I’m just speculating here, but I also don’t think it’s totally unfounded. (Again, because a) I’m picking up what she’s putting down and b) it happens to sooooooo many women even among us dull normals.)

With all the pointed mentions about how much Taylor feels supported in her current relationship and how she in turn loves to offer the same show of support to not only her partner but other loved ones, how she’s stepped out more in the last year to a whole host of events, how she’s mentioned feeling like she locked herself away for years and she’s just proud of her partner and happy she can show up for him even if the chaos around it is unsettling, it paints a picture of what perhaps was happening before last year.

To feel like you’re all alone in carrying the weight of the relationship (or burden of it), of twisting yourself into knots to accommodate the other person’s boundaries (or insecurities) but not feeling reciprocity for your own has to be so painful. (The idea that it may have been even darker and to have a partner not only be unreceptive to your own needs but even perhaps resentful/dismissive/belittling of them is even more painful to think of. I guess we’ll find out when TTPD comes out if that was the case, too.)

At a certain point, that lack of acknowledgement will force your hand to be able to reclaim yourself. And it feels like the further removed Taylor in particular is from it, the more she moves from being sad about the life she felt she gave up by leaving, to angry at the life she felt she was giving up by staying. Especially being in a relationship now where it seems like everything comes much easier, where she can be open about the person she’s with and show up for them, all the stuff that seemed as challenging as climbing Mount Everest in her past is nothing more than a molehill at best in her current life.

TL;DR: I don’t think it’s privacy that inherently spells doom for a celebrity relationship like this; it’s the mutual support and respect that does. If Taylor had felt that in the later years of her previous relationship, I think we could be seeing a different, though not necessarily unfulfilled, person right now in 2024, who’d be happy on tour but whose personal life would look a little different. But it seems like by losing that support she lost parts of herself, and we’ve seen her reclaim that in spades in the last year, and perhaps to degrees she didn’t even realize she could from before all the Bad Stuff started happening in her young adulthood.

I know this was extremely long-winded and unnecessary, especially about total strangers we only know through scraps fed through the media, but I just always bristle at this idea that issues like these boil down to “personality differences,” as though one person wants to live in a city and the other on a remote island, or some shit like that. The whole support (and gender tbh) issue is one that’s just very close to my heart because again, I have seen it play out with so many of my friends in long term relationships and marriages and I just think people in relationships (and women in particular in some circles) deserve better than to feel like they’re being, well, tolerated.

#thisisctrying and taylortruther sorry for tagging you two!#can remove if needed!#but you guys made me think a lot #this was inspired by a conversation i had with a friend the other day #where she relayed an argument she had with her partner #who basically felt slighted that he wasn’t getting acknowledgement for all the housework he does — which is. just. the dishes #and she was like ‘wow congrats you’ve done the dishes — i do every other fucking thing to keep this household afloat in ways you see #and don’t see and i never ask for praise because it’s just stuff that needs to get done because that’s how you support your family’#and it just reminded me that some partners (and a certain kind of man in particular) just… think their struggles take precedence #when their partners drown in them everyday but keep things afloat out of necessity and are never recognized or supported for it #(my friends have shitty husbands/boyfriends can you tell lol)#long post #again the way i just feel like i know the vibes of ttpd in my bones are 😵‍💫#i feel like i have a lot more thoughts but I’m trying to be more gracious and less parasocial so #also just want to again defend the introverts of the world by reiterating that being introverted does not mean unsupportive #being a shitty partner does though!#writing letters addressed to the fire #it’s also just like… i feel like if Taylor had had even a modicum of the support in private and even public she needed #she’d probably still be with you know who and wouldn’t have considered leaving let alone doing it #because it would have felt like enough and like it was what was needed for both of them #whereas we’re seeing a completely new side of her open up now because this is the first time she’s ever had that support from a partner #in her adult life at least #and it’s like it’s opening up things she didn’t know she needed or wanted

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greenerteacups · 18 days

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I’ve just completed your most recent chapter and what a delight it was from start to finish. The slow burn continues to be delicious, and you’re doing an amazing job of gradually adding bits of kindling to the flames to keep DHr’s relationship progressing (and to feed us readers). This most recent chapter was a textbook definition of fic that gets me giggling and kicking my feet.

I’m always amused by our sweet Victorian child Draco’s reaction to sex, and the reference again to sheets and friction sent me. I’m pretty sure this isn’t the first time Draco has been nearly undone by his bedding, and it got me thinking about Pureblood culture’s views of sex and intimacy.

I know oftentimes in fanon, we tend to get Slytherin sex god/goddesses who are having their first sexual experiences pretty early, though occasionally we get a more prudish/Puritanical Draco. We know in Lionheart’s universe, Narcissa alludes to a certain level of hanky panky with Lucius in the RoR, and it certainly seems like Draco had imagined any number of acts with Hermione, even if he hasn’t acted on them in public or perhaps even privately.

If it’s not spoilery, I’d love to know more about how Pureblood culture in Lionheart generally views sex/intimacy, especially inside/outside of courtship and marriage.

It's a mixed bag! I think the Slytherin sex gods thing is a kind of wish-fulfillment (loving compliment) because, put bluntly, the number of 15-17 year-olds who are even kind of charitably good at sex is a mathematical rounding error. Also, Hogwarts has group dorms. Sexiling one person in college is hard enough; imagine you have to sexile (i.e., declare publicly your intent to fuck) 3-5 people every time you want to mess around. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, it absolutely does — it's a coed boarding school, you can't fight the wind — but I will say it's probably more at the realistic level of high schoolers fumbling through the excruciating ordeal of learning intimacy, and not "the plot of Euphoria is happening in the dungeons at all times."

Anyway. I interpret the wealthier pureblood set as a kind of wizarding aristocracy, so while in general they're expected to perform to certain expectations and social mores when they're in social/public settings, the fact of the matter is it's the twentieth century and sexual mores are changing a LOT from decade to decade. Narcissa's upbringing would have been radically different from Draco's in terms of how much sex and intimacy would have been open subject — in no small part because Narcissa's generation kind of blew the ceiling off that particular conversation. She was born in 1955 and lived through the Sexual Revolution, meaning that her childhood, adolesence, and young adulthood took place in practically three different geological eras of social life. Meanwhile, women like Walburga and Druella were members of the Greatest Generation (maybe Silent Gen on the younger side), and would've been incredibly traditionalist.

Of course, no matter what the social rules are, teenagers will find a way around them. For the purposes of Lionheart, in 1995, it's understood by most pureblood parents that kids are gonna do what kids are gonna do, but there are specific standards about who you can be seen with and make certain kinds of promises to. Narcissa kind of references this at the end of book 3; she goes on this insulting little spiel about how generations of Blacks and Malfoys had secret muggle-born pets that they kept on the side, they just didn't bring them to dinner parties. Basically, what you do in the privacy of your bedroom is your own business; just don't get caught and don't try to push boundaries, and your social set will be understanding, up to a point. But it would be absolutely improper for "dating" or "courting" to take place between a muggle-born and a pureblood, because that expresses the intent to associate with them in Society, which is a discrete sphere with its own set of rules — one of which is that you have to enforce the caste system.

With respect to specific mores and rules, there's a few references to "etiquette." That stuff's inspired by real etiquette manuals from Victorian and Edwardian England, though I've occasionally thrown in my own twist when it suits me. Dance with the one that brought you; you should have an escort to balls, theoretically but not necessarily someone you're interested in; women run the household, men run the estate. There are certain standards of chivalry and respect on the men's part, but there are also standards of ladylike conduct and decorum on the girls'. Daphne is shocked when Katie wears a suit to the Ball— to the point where she's like "?? ARE you a girl?" — because the rules of dress and poise have been so drilled into her. The level of slut-shaming we get from the Slytherin girls (despite several Slytherin girls being sexually active) also indicates how female sexuality is policed in a way male sexuality isn't; the rumors about Draco and Daphne hurt Daphne, not Draco. This double-edged hypocrisy runs hand in hand with the idea that women are training to be wives, and shouldn't be sleeping with people (if anyone) who they're not seriously pursuing for marriage. Relatedly, courting/engaged couples are usually seen together, a la Crabbe and Millicent, because the idea is you're supposed to be preparing for your marriage; now that you're socially connected, you've begun your tenure as a Unit, and you're expected to act like it. It would be strange for Vince or Millie to go to a ball with someone else unless that partner was a relative or (possibly) a close family friend. It would... imply something.

Marriage between a man and woman would be expected, not because purebloods on the whole are traditionalist — which, to be clear, they are — but because the emphasis on bloodlines means children are a priority. Pansy gives us the best précis on this in Book 2. Blaise, being gay, is in an interesting place vis-a-vis the marriage question because his position doesn't come from being heir to an old estate, it's from his mother's money; in that respect, he's not bound by usual expectations of hereditary legacies, which is possibly why he's comfortable being out. (Although there's a blink-and-you-miss-it remark about some tension with his mom in "Miseducation.")

#in retrospect that moment with daphne is so funny to me #tfw your social rules are so intense you spontaneously invent the idea of being nonbinary to explain why Girl But Not Skirt??#and find that (to your understanding) completely novel concept more plausible than a girl just wanting to put a suit on #anyway. this is just incoherent rambling about sex and marriage and stuff #I hope it's half interesting!#lionheart spoilers

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ac3-76 · 18 days

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Lloyd Garmadon Headcannons

warnings: none😋

General

He's been doing graffiti since he was 9

he started when he saw a guy doing it while Darklys was on a field trip in Ninjago City

he thought it was really cool and left the group to talk to the guy

His Tag is either Neon Dragon or Neon Echo

He decided it had to have Neon in it because he uses neon in all of his works

People speculate that he's Neon Dragon/Echo but it's not confirmed, not even the other ninja know

He has a graffiti account on Instagram that has 37.8 million followers and is verified

He also really good at painting and sketching

He's just good at art in general

He watches personal attention ASMR to fall asleep

He's good at sewing

He pretty much never posts on his socials, but when he does they get more likes and views than the other ninjas posts

he's the quote "short guys have the prettiest faces and the sassiest attitudes"

he's so sassy

when the Ninjas do interviews people always talk about his sass attacks

there are compilations of him being sassy on tiktok, Instagram reels, and YouTube

Kai's the fan favorite for his looks and how often he posts, but lloyd is the fan favorite for personality and level of cuntiness

Literally everyone in Ninjago loves Lloyd(except the badguys but yk)

Out of all the ninjas he has the 2nd biggest arms(Cole has the biggest)

Girls go crazy for his arms

He's so respectful towards women

He can start a conversation with anyone about anything

He is SO SO SO good with kids

A mom of 2 will be taking the bus home from somewhere, her youngest kid is a couple months old and her oldest is 4 years old

The older ones throwing a tantrum and the youngest is crying and the moms stressed and embarrassed bc this is happening in public and she can't get her kids to calm down

Enter Lloyd "do you want some help?" Garmadon to offer his services

the mom gives him her oldest and in a matter of seconds the kid is happy and smiling

he's not even sure what he did to get the kid so happy

THEN, bc one is never enough🙄, "I can help calm that you down too if you want"

So the mom gives him the newborn and again in a couple seconds the newborn isn't crying

kids just love him🤷‍♀️

He has really unique insults

"your personality is like a wet napkin at a party"

"your fashion sense if like a blindfolded toddler picking out clothes"

"Your ideas are so dull, they make beige look vibrant"

"Your sense of humor is drier than a desert in a drought"

"You're as useful as a screen door in a submarine"

and you best bet they all make it into the Lloyd Garmadon sassy compilations

He has FAST comebacks, he never misses a beat with an insult

Dating

He does a HARD launch

people will be chilling thinking he's single and then one day BAM

he posts something on Instagram announcing he's in a relationship

its 10 pictures of you, him giving you flowers, you guys kissing, you guys cuddling

it's like if you searched relationship goals on Pinterest

and the caption is something like "Happy 1 year babe🫶🫶 I can't imagine my life without you"

everyone in the comments is shocked that he kept your relationship secret for a year

Except the ninjas

who are commenting things about being happy he's finally announced it

I know for a fact Kai would commet "I'm glad you finally announced this, I have hundreds of pictures of you two I've been needing to post🙄"

You're his muse

He does graffiti pieces inspired by you

He also tells you he's Neon Dragon/Echo

He tries to teach you how to do graffiti

He's the type to read and annotate books you like

Collarbone kisser

Helps you figure out fits

MATCHING OUTFITS.

He would embroider a little heart in your favorite color, or your favorite flower into the cuffs of all his hoodies

He doesn't care if you're taller or shorter than him, just don't be the same height as him and ur good

After what happend with Harumi he would struggle to believe you actually like him for a while

Even after you prove you really do like him, he still struggles to express how he feels about you and be completely honest with you

Secret or forbidden relationship trope

he fell first and harder

also soulmate trope

he pays attention to everything you do and knows ur needs, wants, and actions before you do

(yk when Elenor anticipated Chidis sneeze in The Good Place, yea he's Elenor, you're Chidi)

"No I have a partner" instead of "Sorry, I have a partner"

he has awful abandonment issues so he's either really clingy or he pushes you away and doesn't talk to you

He doesn't do sass attacks or insult you(to often)

Kai will be recording a vlog to post to YouTube and you'll say something stupid, Lloyd will look at you like he wants to insult you but be doesn't

The fans see that clip and go crazy

"Lloyd holding back his insult is how you know he's in love"

The ship edits go HARD

#ninjago headcanons #lloyd garmadon #ninjago lloyd #ninjago #lloyd is a graffiti artist

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streets-in-paradise · 20 days

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Secret Presents

Relationships: (platonic) Faramir x Sister!Reader, (platonic) Boromir x Sister!Reader.

Genre: family fic, sibling bonds, fluff, birthday fic.

Warnings: Denthor's terrible parenting, use of she/her pronoums. I am not sure if birthdays are culturally accurate for gondorians, but since in lotr we saw at least one hobbit birthday let's pretend they also could have birthday customs for the sake of this.

Summary: Boromir and Faramir surprise their sister on the morning of her birthday filling her with affection while furtively bringing her different sorts of gifts their father wouldn't approve.

Note: (Late) birthday gift for my bestie @beautifultypewriter, also inspired in her gondor girl concept. I hope the fluff will be good enough to compensate the delay <3

She didn't expected anyone to remember, there were allways more important things going on in such convoluted times.

Completely absent from her father's thoughts, only her brothers could possibly think about it. During the occassions in which Denethor do cared to celebrate her, he was always actually celebrating himself. Birthday parties that were generic social events for the nobiity, occassions for him to show off his might in decline and pretend for the public that he could resemble a father.

If he could possibly be thinking on doing something, she would rather hide far away from it for as long as possible. The only good reason the Steward of Gondor could have to remember that he had a daughter were the men arround him making the recall. He would only use it as an excuse to push yet even more insufferable nobles in her direction.

Feeling the call of the servant announcing her waking time that morning made her groan of frustration, wanting it to be over before it ever began. She emerged from the covers only caring to make sure to be in a visible state before opening the door, trying hard to remember not to share her mood with the servantfolk through terrible manners.

What she found instead were her two brothers hidding their presence on the usual call, ready to join forces as soon as they will find her. Their happy faces said it all, and she almost regretted her grumpyness.

" What are you doing here? "

To a gestural sign of Faramir, Boromir went ahead to lift her up from the ground. Almost like a father would do for his child, only with tons of chuckling in between.

" HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DEAR SISTER!!"

In a matter of instants she was smiling again while being carried back inside her bedroom.

" Are you insane? What is this? "

Faramir calmed his own laughter to explain.

" Your birthday surprise! I bet you thought we would forget. "

She was perfectly aware of how strongly they loved her, but war kept them always bussy and she was perfectly ready to forgive them if that was the case.

" Orcs are constantly pushing the limits of our borders, of course you could forget! "

" But we would never. " Boromir cheerfully insisted, releasing her on her bed. " Have we ever failed you? "

She giggled and nodded negatively.

" ... Then why did you seem so upset looking at us from you doorframe ? " Faramir inquired. " It think somone really needs to get their spirits lifted. "

With a mischievous look he approached for a strong hug ending only when he sneaked one hand to her already known ticklish point. Her loud laughing comforted them all, so Boromir encouraged Faramir to keep going untill she started fighting back and the situation could escalate into an actual tickle fight unleashed right in front of the servants.

She was red from laughing and playfully smacked them in return, when her eldest brother gave premission for the maidservant to enter. She was carrying a curiously long chest with the help of one lad and presented it to the lady by command before retiring.

" See, if we would have waited untill you would come down for breakfast, we wouldn't be able to bring your presents. " Faramir continued. " These are of the kind our father will not wish to see. "

A sparkle of excitement lighted her eyes.

" Certainly not fitting for a lady, by his expressed opinion. " Boromir added. " He would be very dissapointed of me if he would find out I'm letting Faramir present you with this."

" Not as much as when he will see what you got her. " He commented in response. " ... And yours can't be hidden easily, as one can do with mine. "

Curiosity was growing with each of their teasing recalls and she rushed to open the mysterious casket used to hide such secret present from the world untill reaching her.

It revealed a bow, perfectly new and with its matching quiver following the style of the one that was her brother's favorite.

" Nurturing your passions is important to me, and being honest i'm slightly jealous you have gained more practice with Boromir's weapon of choice. "

He was joking and she could perfectly tell. Her brothers never had to compete for her love the way their father intended them to.

Here eyes were roaming the weapon with increasing surprise, then inmediately directed to look at her brother with the happiest adoration.

" It's perfect!! Just, ... perfect!! Beloved brother, I would love to practice with you. " She thanked, hugging him from up front and practically jumping from the joy. " I can't wait to try it!! "

" We will tell father is an harp." Faramir joked, sharing her excitement. " I doubt he would ever ask you to play music for him, so he will never discover it."

You chuckled together seeing that Boromir was allowing you the mean spirited commentary.

" My gift will also work as a distractive strategy: he will never get a moment to wonder about anything else. "

She questioned Faramir with her glance, but he provided no clues.

" Boromir ... what have you exactly done?? "

Their eldest brother began to chuckle, assuming the mysterious guilt for some possibly memorable mischief.

" Come down with us and you will find out. "

She smiled and quickly followed the instruction, begging them to leave her proper space to at least dress decently before being publicly perceived for the first time in the day. Neither of her brothers wanted to miss what was about to come, so they awaited outside only to find themselves going after her later because excitement made her run her way down.

Hardly catching his breath, Boromir indicated her to go outside. Her cluelessness made her even more desperate for finding the surprise, but she inmediately stumbled with it once the final instruction was correctly followed.

A magnificent horse, one that she never recalled to have seen before.

" It was almost impossible to import, but your dear brother planned things with time and sent clever merchants on the quest for it. " Boromir recalled, pridefully. " They wouldn't have sold this easily for a mighty lord of the city, but couldn't refuse when told it would dissapoint a young lady. "

She looked at him in disbelief, unsure of the guess she was about to make.

" No,no, no ... There is no way. You couldn't ... "

" Send men to Rohan despite the uncertain danger it implies just to get you a horse? " Faramir followed, finishing her sentence in a wondering tone. " Don't worry, your present also worked as harmless excuse to obtain trustable testimonies about the state of our old allies. Something we have been wanting to find out for a long time, but father kept refusing to investigate. "

The clarification amused her more than the explanation itself.

" You are unbelievable!! How are we going to hide this? "

Boromir wasn't troubled by her very logical reasoning.

" We won't, and I will assume all guilt. Wait to see how fast he will find a reason to excuse me. "

He made her laugh through that lighthearted mock of his unwanted privilege, aspect he manipulated in contructive ways when it could bring a side benefict to his siblings.

Looking at her smiling brothers awaiting her final verdict made her feel the luckiest girl in Middle Earth.

" I have the best brothers in the world. "

#lotr #lord of the rings #faramir x reader #boromir x reader #gondor girl

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hargreevesd · 4 months

Text

BAUKLÖTZE. Hange Zoë x reader Ackerman

Chapter One

Wall Sina

Year 850

"Hange, let me guess, are you about to visit the kid?"

"Of course, do you want you come with me? He needs someone to accompany him and he has to be out in 20 minutes."

"Do we really trust him?" I asked her with a shaky voice. He was just a little kid after all.

"Levi said he is worthy to trust, I think this says enough." Hange replied with confidence. This was enough for me to believe.

"I will wait for you in the door, don't be late, we don't have time."

The kid I was talking about, Eren Yeager, apparently could transform into a Titan. That would bring us so many chances to win against Titans. Could anyone even imagine that we could just use a Titan against others? He could fix the broken entrance of Wall Maria and we could retake back our land. Lots of our problems would be solved. But... Is he trustworthy? I heard from Erwin that he plans to join the Scout regiment. Besides from what he wants...

We have to succeed in this court. We have a plan but it's still difficult to win their trust. After all, they look at us like we are already dead.

"Ackerman!"

Wall Sina

Year 830

"Ackerman! Why don't you go and live with your other family back to Wall Maria in the underground? You don't belong here"

Comments about my blood family, the Ackemans, were made every other day. I couldn't really avoid it so I just accepted it. Something that crossed my mind though every day was 'why would they leave me and I ended up being adopted?' Not that I don't want my parents, but what if? Or what if they never kept my real name? I could be Y/N Stones. Or else I could be secret underground spy? Why would I even want that? I don't care about the history of my name. All I just want is to be historian.

"I'm so sorry for them, they are not bad, they just can't express their feelings we'll! " A kid in front of them told me as the others left. They were from my class, their hair were in a messy bun and they were carrying some big science books.

"I didn't ask." Look who was talking. Their friends have not stopped a single minute judging the very single move I do. At least it were them all alone and not with the things they talk with.

"Ackerman right? I always wanted to meet one actually, I find your family history really interesting."

"Yeah right, thank you." Of course it's always my family that they are interesting, not me.

"I'm Hange Zoë by the way, we are in the same class but we never really talk much so..

"Y/N." I just stood there staring at her because I had no intention of starting an actual conversation. Why would I?

"Come on Hangeee, leave the freak alone and join us!" all of her friends were screaming from behind but she didn't leave. She stayed there looking at me.

"We could be friends if you want to..." I guess she saw that I was not in the best mood for company. I was looking down like I was not even listening to her. But I did. And I wanted a friend. But not her. She already had her stupid friends anyway.

"Or I guess another time, see you around Ackerman!"

Wall Sina

Year 850

I turned around and saw Miche with Hange and right besides them, Eren. Hange was calling me from far behind. She truly liked calling me by my last name, not only in public but in general. And I just let her. Just her.

"Oh and here is Captain Y/N Ackerman, the greatest soldier we have alongside with Levi" Hange introduced me with the biggest smile she could wear. Why would she even say that, I told her many times to not introduce me again like that.

"Ackerman?" The kid asked.

"That's right kid. You must be Εren Yeager?"

"Ri-right" He seemed confused. Did I say something weird? Did I scare him?

"Be careful out there kid. It will be hard, but have faith in our Commander." I held his arm and showed him the way to the court.

"I know it's selfish, but we have no choice than to blindly trust you." Hange said and pushed him through the door.

"Do you believe we can win?" Hange asked me.

"We will."

"I told you we would win! I'm so excited to see what future holds us with this kid." Hange told us as we were walking out of the court.

"Yeah..." I heard what she said but I was just zoned out that moment. I was thinking about Eren's friend, Mikasa I believe it was her name. Do we happen to be relatives somehow? The backstory of my biological parents will probably haunt me forever, since I never got to know them. They could be dead. Or they could be hiding. Or-

"Y/N. Are you here?" and that's when I came to my senses. Why do I care about them anyways? They left me.

"Yes. Sorry, I was thinking about something."

"You always think about something Y/N, take a break." a familiar voice joined us.

"Agh!... Hello Erwin!" I smiled and I gave him a hug. "You can't really give advises on that topic when you are worse yourself" I looked behind him and I saw Levi with Eren holding some bandages to help with the bleeding. I couldn't not notice the steam... He really was a Titan after all. We joined all together a room to help Eren. Hange took care of him so she could take a better look on his wounds.

"Levi you could be more gentle. He is a kid after all." I broke the silence of the room.

"Tsk, nonsense, he seems just fine to me. Plus we needed to ensure he is trustworthy." Levi replied to me with his old time serious face.

"Does it hurt?" Hange asked Eren who was sitting on the bed with his hand on his head.

"A little..." he whispered.

And those two sat there, with Hange examinating Eren's teeth and screaming about how cool it was that he is healing himself and Eren totally confused. Our lives were about to change with this kid. I hope it was the best choice to join us and continue our journey. I had a feeling that Erwin is already planning an exhibition. He seemed skeptical.

I looked at Hange again and this time she was writing down her conclusions. I wish I had her patience sometimes, she looked so peaceful and excited. I was sitting in a chair near the window and I looked outside. The only thing I could see was a carriage and some horses. How much I missed my bed at the moment, I haven't slept at least for 48 hours. Right after our exhibition, the wall broke and I think I didn't have five minutes of peace from back then.

Me and my team, Sara, Celia, Rien and Floris alongside with Levi's team went to the old Scout Regiment headquarters. Hange was busy calculating her results from some experiments on her two titans, Moblit tried to keep his sanity over super excited Hange.

Levi was cleaning up the mess and I was reading at the library. Yet after so many books that I've read in my life I'm still learning. And I stayed there till very late. I was reading about our economic history. Economics are probably the hardest history you could find. Specific numbers, terms etc. I was sitting next to a massive desk with a candle and I was holding that big dusty book in front of me. My team and everyone were probably sleeping. They had to rest after all. I believe hard times are coming. Maybe we did find a solution with Eren, but it could also be our doom. As I was thinking all of these I heard a sound. I left the book I was holding and rushed to the door to listen what was going ok outside. I didn't heard anything so I opened it. The room next to the old library was the meeting room. I went inside and I found Hange all alone sitting on the floor.

"Hange... What are you doing on the floor?" I asked her and I started walking towards her.

"Eh, you know, just thinking..."

"Thinking of what in the floor? Where's Moblit? I thought you two were together thinking about experiments." I reached her and joined her on the floor. We are doing this at least one time a week. She finds it comfortable to sit down like that and I just join her.

"He was tired and I gave him the permission to leave..." She let it a sigh. "Everyone was tired actually. Why aren't you asleep? Pretty sure it's late and you must be tired..."

"I was reading and I heard a noise, probably you falling to the floor as I see." I smiled softly. What a typical night for Hange.

"Probably" She laughed, but seconds later she went silent again.

"Go on." I expressed.

"What?" She looked at me with a weird look. "What do you mean go on?"

"Tell me everything. We have all night."

"Re-really? Lydia no, you are tired." She stopped but my face was dead serious and immediately she got up and started jumping. "Can't decide where to start! Wait no I know. Get up!" She grabbed my hands and pulled me so I could get up.

"Hange please!" I started laughing.

"No laughs, no Hanges! We have job to do Ackerman! So look first of all-..."

And she rambled the whole night. About almost everything she had on her mind. And I didn't stop her. Not once. I was always there to listen when Hange needed to talk. No other reason, but I found her way of thinking extraordinary. I was always surprised by her knowledge. Even when we were kids, or when we joined the scouts ten years ago. Even that cold and stormy day where the exhibition went... Not time for that. She just... She just never proved me wrong.

Days passed and we had no improvement in everything. Neither with Eren or with Hange's Titans. I spent many nights awake alongside with Hange and Moblit exchanging theories and facts. That way maybe we could find something. Something well hidden. Most of the time I was in my room writing, thinking, googling, writing again, throwing papers away then the same thing all over again.

Erwin had a plan and we were just waiting for the news. So until that day I did the same thing again and again and again.

Until,

"Captain!" I heard a voice from behind and I turned around to see Celia. She seemed upset. Or to word it more correctly, amazed.

"Yes?"

"Eren transformed. Section Commanders Hange and Moblit are heading there at the moment." She was out of breath as she was saying this. She probably ran a long way to inform me.

"Thank you Celia for informing me. Get some rest while you can." I said to her and as she was leaving I started tiding the mess I had made before. If Eren finally successed and he managed to transform and expedition would start soon. That means no time to even think. When I rushed outside, everyone was returning. I was late but at least everyone was okay. Eren seemed so confused and terrified. Levi's team also. That was new. What happened? I wasn't with them for one time and they return like this? I turned my head to look around but Hange was nowhere to be found.

"Moblit where is she?" I asked nervously.

"She returned to Trost, pretty sure she is testing some new ideas."

"Oh thank you Moblit."

I understand that she went to see her Titans but I was expecting her point of view with Eren's transformation.

Some days later back to Trost, I woke up from Hange's screaming. Her room was next to mine. She asked for this when she was announced Section Commander and me Captain, so we could work without bothering others. Why would she be screaming that early? She does that a lot, but from the voice of hers I could tell something was off. Did anything happen? Is she okay? Why was I sleeping? What if? I tried to get ready quickly and went to knock their door but they didn't answer. How is that? She was screaming a moment ago. And then I heard her from outside. Outside? What would anything ne outside so import- wait. Don't tell me.

No.

Did we just lost... No.

My mind was full of thoughts while I was running to find Hange. And then I found her.

Why?

Who could do this?

Those monsters Hange loved were important for us. The only thing I could do was to get down and comfort her so they could stop screaming and crying. They were her kids, we spend days talking about them. Why? How?...

She didn't push me away, she did the exact opposite. Hange grabbed my hand like they were saying 'please don't let me go' and I didn't. I couldn't.

"It will be okay Hange, you are with me now."

...

How?

...

A traitor? No. Y/N you are thinking dramatically, something more logical happened. No. There's no other way. Someone killed them. Someone knew it all and destroyed our hope. I would find them. No way I would let them get away with this.

I had years to see Hange like that. Not after that day. The day my life changed. So I held them close, just like back then.

Wall Rose

842

knock. knock.

Nothing.

I knocked their door again.

"Cadet Zoë?"

"Yes?"

"May I come in?"

"Go ahead." she didn't sound so happy. I mean how could she?

I opened their door and I found them on the floor with the legs spread and their hands on their head.

"Section Commander Erwin send me, how are you doing?"

"Incredible. I think you can see it..."

I didn't say anything. After all... that happened, it was the least she could do about it. Try not to think. Try not to see something that reminds you of them.

"You know, we can go for some training to clean your mind... Or to the library, it has so many great books. I can suggest you some! Or um we can go eat something? Or definitely-" I didn't finished with the suggestions since she interrupted me.

"Thank you for trying, but I don't want any of those. You can go to Erwin and tell him I'm alright."

"Hange. You don't seem alright." I declared, no way I would leave her like that.

"Well of course!" She shouted.

"Look I know, it's hard. I've been there, but life doesn't stop. If you stop fighting you will lose. If your walls fall, you have to re-build them and start again." I sat down next to her and I pointed out side the window, where the walls were visibe.

"What like toy blocks like we were kids?"

"Exactly. You never thought of this before?"

"No... Not really. I mean it's not the most common comparison you could hear." Hange replied.

"I know... I know. But if you think like that maybe it will change something in your life. You can go out and seek revenge. Risk your own life. Or you could stay here, forever, trying to fix a wound that probably won't close because you yet don't believe it happened." I explained.

She didn't say anything back. She wrapped her eyes and stared the wall.

"Hange... I can leave you if you want me to, it's okay if you don't want to come with me..."

"Where to Captain?" She finally smiled. I knew them for so long, but I truly met ther yesterday.

"Captain? Me? I could never. You're funny after all."I laughed with her comment. "Library. My favorite place that I assure you it will cheer you up!"

I offered her my hand and then I showed her the way. When I was feeling down I always went to the library. It's always there for you. From what I remember from school they liked science so I went to that section.

"Go on choose!"

Her smile lightened the library.

"Tea? Coffee? What can I make you?"

She started reading something and they totally ignored me now. Agh at least they have a good time. "Hange, want me to bring anything?"

"Oh, sure yes, some black coffee! Bring something for you also and sit with me. We can analyse this facts, how a star even though-"

Wall Rose

Year 850

Knock. Knock.

Nothing.

"Hange. It's me."

"Come in." she finally answered.

I opened their door and stepped into her room. I was assuming Moblit to be there but he wasn't. They were at their desk, papers thrown everywhere, in the floor, in the bed, in the desk, in the window...

"Let me guess, Erwin send you?"

#hange x oc #hange zoe x reader #hange x reader #hange zoë #hange zoe #attack on titan x reader #attack on titan #aot x reader #aot #levi ackerman #erwin smith #ackerbond #ackerman #Spotify

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wilhelmsbee · 3 months

Note

Okay honestly? I'll just take you up on that offer because I'm obsessed with your edits in general, but if you ever feel like talking some more about that Wilhelm edit you did to the song Ribs by Lorde??? Would love that because that edit lives rent-free in my head! (no pressure though, I just like the idea of like... director's commentary or something for edits haha)

I HOPE EVERYONE IS READY FOR ME TO BE INSANELY DEEP ABOUT THIS EDIT OH MY GOD

preface: i talk ab why i chose each scene for the lyrics, then colouring/font, idk if this is the directors commentary you wanted but like this is how I think about all my edits

We're reeling through the midnight streets- initially, I actually wanted to start it on the this dream isn't feeling sweet line but it just didn't fit in instagrams 1-minute time frame ANYWAY This scene has always been the most painful to me. Wilhelm realises at this moment that he's truly, undeniably alone in his life. Everyone he trusts (or is supposed to trust) has left him, and he has nobody left to go to. He's alone, going through his own personal hell, finding out his only family cares more about public perception than him as a person. It's like the beginning of the worst spiral we see from Wilhelm. Its quite a literal scene-to-lyric moment, but also the we're part feels (to me) like him-as-well-as his public self. Crown Prince Wilhelm and Wille are such separate parts, and its all he has left.

And I've never felt more alone- The THERAPY SCENE! Specifically this is the I think it's better not knowing how it could feel scene, because that truly is the most heartbreaking viewpoint I've ever seen from a character. It was better not being in love because I couldn't miss it. He might be getting closer to the other boys in the secret society, as well as Felice, but he's not really breaking past the surface level with anyone. Not even Felice knows the depths of his pain, he keeps it all to himself. The loneliness crushes him, he wishes he didn't know how love felt. As far as he's concerned, he's never loving someone else again (true) and he's never going to be able to love Simon again (false). In this moment there's this feeling of emptiness. He has nothing he actually cares about, and he wishes that he never cared in the first place.

It feels so scary, getting old- He wasn't supposed to fill this role, giving a speech as the Crown Prince of Sweden about his brother's passing. Wilhelm's character (obviously) fundamentally switches after Erik's death. He used to be a lot sillier, more reckless and more willing to fight back against his parents. But now he's got every single eye on him, watching him. Put into an adult role at the age of sixteen, forced to carry the burden of spare his whole childhood, then suddenly forced to be the sole heir. Even if he had planned to maybe one day be the heir (which he didn't, judging by the he should be here instead of me comment) it wasn't supposed to happen until he was older and wiser. He stops acting like a kid because he can't be a kid anymore. The cuts between the frog/getting the frog/breaking the globe aimed to emphasise this. He's lost all connection to his brother, he's in a place he didn't expect to be until he was extremely old (if ever), and he's lost control of his own life.

We can talk it so good, we can make it so divine, we can talk it good how we wish it would be all the time- I wanted to frame Simon in this as a sort of healthy distraction for Wilhelm. He was the only person in his life who actually looked out for him and cared. They're happy and they're smiling, all the clips are intimate even if there's someone else there. It highlights how they care. It's good, it's divine. It's what kept him happy after the hardest thing in his life (so far). In this edit, he desperately wants it back because he knows how much it helped. It was the only bright thing he had. The cutting to Wilhelm alone in s2 after how we wish it would be all the time just aims to really enforce that he wished it was still like that, wishing for someone who truly cared and loved him. It's all yearning, pining, wishing things were better. Every single clip is a clip in which Wilhelm has been pining over Simon. There's an ache he expresses that was just so, so important to this edit.

This dream isn't feeling sweet- Lots of clips of Wilhelm trying to process things. He's been forced to change his entire life, after all being a prince is a privilege, not a punishment. The 'dream' of being royal crushes him, despite the fact he can't ever voice it. Walking down the halls of his castle, sitting in his private boarding school therapy session with an actual therapist, being driven home in a private car from the party where he was filmed fighting. These luxuries juxtaposed with his actual circumstances hurt. He can't complain because he's got it best in the country, but it isn't a system designed for him, it doesn't want to help him, it wants to make him conform. It isn't fair, but he can't say that.

We're reeling through the midnight streets- He's forcing himself to try and fit the mould while also being himself, and all it causes is pain. He's actively fighting against the institution he was raised in simply by existing. The panic attack from being perceived holding Simon's hand. Deleting his contact after his mother told him 'no more mistakes.' Trying to play nice at the dinner table even though his whole life was crumbling around him and the institution was failing everyone even though nobody believed him. The panic attack/anxiety vomit from Simon going public, against Wilhelm's institution, knowing that he might not be able to protect him. He's got no control in any of these scenes, its a desperate fight against himself. He's a publicity risk to his own family if he is true to himself, and he's a risk to himself if he isn't.

And I've never felt more alone- Desperately trying to comfort himself when nobody else can (or wants to) comfort him. After the fight at the party all his family cared about was the PR response. When August said that Simon would take the fall for the drugs, all he cared about was getting Alexander back. During the uniform tailoring, all Jan-Olof cared about was tradition and making Simon as background as he could. When Wilhelm gave up meditating to soothe his anxiety, he was upset at his inability to calm down, despite the fact he's never been given an opportunity to be calm. Nobody really knows about his mental health struggles, he just has to fight through them and desperately try to self-soothe. Nobody else will comfort him after all.

It feels so scary getting old- Each of these scenes show Wilhelm being viewed as his role instead of being viewed as a person. He clearly struggles with being viewed as just the Crown Prince of Sweden, especially since that was never supposed to be his role, so of course it hurts when he's viewed as just a pawn in the Royal Family. Especially from people he loves. Yes, it was undeniably hard when he first became the Crown Prince, and it absolutely would've crushed him to know that when he had a panic attack he couldn't be alone. But these scenes are interlaced with him being viewed as a political pawn by Simon and his mother. People he loves, people he trusts. He's just a public statement to his mother, and he's just a human representation of the Crown to Simon (in these scenes not in general ofc). He's never going to be able to be his own person again, because he's got a country to run when he grows up and a public image to form between now and then.

This dream isn't feeling sweet- The lyrics are now getting more compounding, it's louder and it's closer. He's fighting to be heard, he's being ripped off of his desk, he's forcing down a panic attack because he needs to be happy for Simon. His emotions aren't allowed, he can't feel anything negative so he won't feel anything at all. Nothing in his life feels good anymore, so he's fighting the losing battle to just try to break even. Nobody would dream of this, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. He can't even voice that, though.

We're reeling through the midnight streets- Now he's reminiscing about when things were easier, but they weren't, really. Yes, the placard was there the night he first kissed Simon, but that was also the beginning of the horrific realisation he wasn't built for the world he is forced to live in. His mother says 'no more mistakes' and he already knows it means he has to leave Simon. When that doesn't work and it all falls out, he's left to try and clean his own image up by nailing the closet shut with every fibre of his being. His life wasn't better, he's grasping for anything to show him life will be okay again. Everything has crumbled and now he's got nothing, so he yearns for when he had something, even if it was just something to lose.

And I've never felt more alone- He is constantly left. Something that isn't brought up enough is how often he's just abandoned. He has no one to talk to, he's forced to work through his struggles alone because his existence is political and any sign of weakness being public could reflect badly on his family. He becomes the embodiment of the Prince he could never be. Walking to the lake and reminiscing about when he would be happy there. Being left alone by his brother, who didn't even reply to him asking to say hi to his mother and father, who he then never sees in person again. Then wearing his brother's jacket. He's alone, and all he does is pine for a time when he wasn't. All he wants to do is go back and do it all again, and he can't. But he also can't move forward, he doesn't want to, he doesn't know how.

It feels so scary- Only two scenes so I'll discuss 'em one by one: -At Erik's funeral, there's a more literal fear of getting old. I don't want to repeat myself more than I already have but obviously, that forced Wilhelm to grow up and be more mature, and act like a Crown Prince instead of just the Prince. More attention, less room for error. He's terrified of fucking it up, and there's nobody who can help him. -The breakup scene is more metaphorical. He has to grow up and figure out what he wants to do with his life, while also having to grow to understand what he actually has the ability to do with his life. He's not ready to do this because he wants things to be good and happy but it was ripped away from him. He can't just pretend everything is alright anymore, but the amount of maturing he needs to do seems impossible at this moment, especially knowing he was in love with a boy when he wasn't allowed to be. He tries to be both a Prince and Wilhelm and all it did was betray his boyfriend's trust.

getting old- Wilhelm shutting his computer and pressing his hands to his eyes. It's exhausting. He's exhausted. Constantly working to try and be who he's supposed to be as well as being himself and trying to navigate his emotions in a vulnerable state is just too much. He can't carry it all, so he just gives up for a moment. It all goes quiet, but not in a good way. When you're that overwhelmed, the lack of anything just leaves more room to spiral.

FONT CHOICES

Intro: literally my handwriting. I wanted this to feel personal and almost like a desperate written plea to go back to when it was good, and what's more personal than my own handwriting am I right!!!

First chorus loop: Magazine font, it's in pieces and it doesn't match. There's a sporadic chaos, like he's beginning to feel it but it isn't there yet. The text isn't fully opaque, it's in front of him. We're seeing it before he does in this context. Trying to reflect how the media knows things before he does, like his brothers death, the tape leaking, all that good stuff.

Second chorus loop: Big, Bold, Unavoidable! I rotobrushed Wilhelm in every scene so that the text could be intertwined with him. He can't escape the reality of his situation, he is getting crushed by these feelings. The song gets louder and more claustrophobic, the text is in the scenes with him. It haunts him, it's everywhere. When he closes the laptop and it all goes silent, its not relaxing, it just makes you anxious in a different way.

COLOURING

I actually chose the blues from the intro scene, mainly in the night sky bit of the frame. Also! All the happy Wilmon scenes have a higher saturation, though you can't tell because of how I did the colouring. It just results in them being a little bit brighter, because things were good then and I believe it should feel good then, too.

#ellieoughposting #ellieeditrambles #new tag for if anyone else asks me ab any of my edits #cannot stress enough ill write one of these for any edit you want #just ask #anyway #edit analysis #wilmon edit #no beta we die like erik #wilhelm x ribs #also idk how else to mention this but this edit was a vent edit #like yes i think this hard about vent edits i have autism i cant not think

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rockingrobin69 · 8 months

Text

Tiny snippet from imperfection, sad and a little sweet.

When Draco was twenty-one years old, he went to buy new towels.

Harry had his eye set on this purple monstrosity, extremely fluffy and very soft and terribly, horribly over-priced. Draco’s allowance hadn’t come through that month (or the one before), but more important was the uncontrollable urge to give Harry everything: anything he could want, ice-lollies and royal-blue pyjamas and another jumper, why the hell not. To spoil Harry rotten, the way he was always meant to be, to surround him with so much love he’d forget for a moment he was ever without it.

Draco wasn’t new to loving someone. Not, even, to doing so obsessively, inexorably. What was new was the look in Harry’s eyes, was being able to hold his hand in public (in—most places in the city). Was the way Harry said his name, the way his courage was stupidly infectious and his heart so big it didn’t fit in his chest, kept coming out in his smiles and in his hands, warm and soft and always generously offered.

Harry was only visiting. He didn’t, technically, live in Draco’s flat, but he didn’t, technically, have to return to Glasgow for another three weeks.

They made do with the time.

And Draco insisted that Harry must have his own things: his own bathrobe, his own pyjamas, his own toothbrush (fucking—gross, Harry!) and his own towel. Bringing them here, to the shopping centre with the terrible, tacky shop with the terrible, tacky things Harry wanted that terrible, tacky Draco would give his life to get for him.

Not in a dramatic way. In a—subdued, quiet way. In an utterly devoted, hopeless way that shouldn’t have felt nice, that still did. Everything felt nice about Harry. Everything but—

No, that wasn’t Harry’s fault, not even a little. Draco being disgusting and horrible was always meant to be kept secret. And it worked, when Harry lived in Glasgow and Draco in Oxford, it worked when they didn’t spend all their time together, but summer was long and tight and close and… and… and Draco didn’t know how to do this. To bare himself without fleeing, to give what he previously thought wasn’t in him, what couldn’t have been.

(Such as: his heart. Strange, no, that it actually belonged to him, when it never felt like it before. When it was wrapped so tight in strings upon strings, tying it to—other places, other people).

And Harry gave back. Everything Draco wanted to hand him, Harry insisted to return. To hold with care all of Draco’s sharp edges. And Draco was worried that he’d keep holding, even after Draco started to crack, and end up with hands full of shards of cutting Draco, end up—hurt.

Harry held the towel very close to his body. A bit like he worried someone might try to snatch it from him. Draco hated the people who raised him (a familiar, anchoring anger) and, out of spite, took his hand.

“Hey,” soft, like the towel. Harry looked up, his smile focusing, turning un-lost.

“Hi. Sorry. Fuck, you’re cold! C’mere.” Wrapping himself around Draco (uncaring for sharp, sharp edges). “It’s a bit expensive, though. There’s another set at half the price in—”

“Harry,” Draco said, “shut up. It’s from me.”

Meaning: it’s not enough for what I want to give you, for what I wish I could. (And Draco’s sad bank statement would be a worry for another day. He could do more hours at the book shop, if Father didn’t… if he stayed in Beijing for a little bit longer).

Harry squeezed him tighter. “You’re so sweet,” he said, and when Draco scoffed, “no, really,” and when Draco scoffed louder, “you are. You’re so—shut up, you’re maybe the sweetest person I’ve ever met, and—”

“Have you? met me, I mean. There’s not a single thing about me that’s sweet.”

“Your lips are sweet,” Harry said slyly. Draco refused to blush.

“Your hand is sweet,” Harry said, and brought it to his mouth for a chaste kiss.

“Your—”

“We’re in public, you fiend,” Draco said breathlessly, when Harry did no more than kiss the inside of his palm. Harry, being a fiend, laughed.

“God. I’m so fucking into you. It’s—come here,” drawing his face up to be kissed, not letting him shy away. Kissed the tip of his nose and his cheek and his left eyebrow. “You’re amazing, you know that?”

Draco couldn’t even attempt coherency. Outmatched, overwhelmed with the constant onslaught, Harry-Harry-Harry all the time, and so warm and so sweet and so there, for a whole week now he was there, staying for the month. What… how could Draco defend against him?

So he pushed away, rolled his eyes, hid his red-red cheeks in Harry’s shoulder and didn’t cry. Didn’t even wish to. It was very bright in the shop and the centre was overcrowded and too noisy, and inside it they were huddled together, a bubble of fluffy, purple towel, and them.

It had to be enough. This month, this—whatever Harry would give him, it had to be enough. Draco would be grateful and suffice with it, and not beg for more. And not be greedy, because greed was a punishable offence and terribly gauche and Draco was better than that, was a Malfoy, was a—yes, all that.

So they bought the fucking towel. Then went home, and watched a film, and ate ramen, and sat very close to each other, sharp edges and all.

#900-ish words #drarry fic #sweetness - mostly #fluff and a touch of angst #snippet of the whumpy one #considering reading the whole fic? please have a look at the TWs #they are plentiful and not at all exaggerated #this snippet is (miraculously) trigger warning free

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