#the shit that happened near the end made me SOB
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watched encanto for the first time and. im not crying. my eyes are just leaking.
anyways expect a lot of encanto reblogs and posting im normal
#encanto#disney encanto#oh ym fucking god#that movie was so good#the shit that happened near the end made me SOB#god hold on
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Hello lovely,
I saw your post that your requests are open, so I will give it a try =)
Imagine Bucky and reader are best friends but they have a huge argument and now they don't talk to each other for days. She's feeling really bad, missing him. He is her most important person and now without interacting with him for days, she's feeling lost and lonely and heartbroken. Maybe she has not a super power and is only a normal human, helping the Avengers with IT or something. Due to the argument with her best friend and not talking to Bucky (Bucky ignores her completely) she begins to feel it not only mental but also physically. She can't eat probably and at the end falls deathly sick.... With a fluffy happy ending and a worried and protective Bucky
Please. That would be nice.
Take care honey
oh my goodness— my heart 😭❤️ the angst is gonna hurt, but i’m such a sucker for it. i had so much fun writing this one, thank you for requesting and i hope you like it🥰
Love Hurts
♡ Pairing: Beefy!Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader
♡ Summary: You and Bucky get into a heated argument, things are said and done and now he won’t speak to you. You don’t think you can handle him ignoring your existence.
♡ Warnings: language, mentions of bucky’s trauma, heavy angst, malnourishment, depression, anxiety/panic attacks, minor injuries, hospitalization, suicidal ideation, self hate, literally hurt just writing this
main masterlist
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT | MATURE CONTENT 18+
Your nails bit into your palm, denting the flesh— threatening to pierce the delicate skin. It was all to hold yourself back, distract you from the words that wanted to burst out.
It was becoming a sickening routine, Bucky was reckless and had yet another near death experience on his recent mission. The anxiety and the nerves stopping your body from functioning— the dreaded wait for his jet to arrive back at the compound. You shouldn’t have to be used of receiving the call that he had yet again made a reckless move— but you were starting to discover a pattern.
It did nothing to ease the panic that swirled in your chest every time he left for missions. You’d sob, throwing up everything you had eaten that day— unable to stomach anything with the idea that Bucky was on a mission. You never found your anxiety to be so severe— but when Bucky was even mentioned about going on a mission… it spiked.
That’s where you found yourself in his room, watching him pace the space— avoiding your frustrated stare. You weren’t angry at him per say— you were angry that he didn’t value his life.
“Seriously (Y/n)— you get so worked up over nothing. I’m here and alive— isn’t that enough?” He exclaimed, throwing his hands up in frustration.
You pressed your nails tighter to your palm, yet the pain couldn’t stop your thundering thoughts.
“You’re here and alive now, until you do some stupid shit like this again and are dead!” You hissed, trying to keep your voice low but you didn’t know how much longer you could control yourself.
He glared at you, squinting his eyes in anger and then rolling his eyes.
“Oh for fucks sake— can you stop fucking babying me? I can handle myself!” He raised his voice, his metal arm whirring.
“I’m not babying you— I’m just scared you’re gonna get yourself killed. Do you care about your life at all?” You asked him aggressively, your voice raising just a tad.
He took a long pause, staring at you with his face void of emotion— only annoyance.
“Not really.” He admitted.
You were taken back, although you had these conversations with him a time or twenty. It was an ongoing process to get him to slowly love himself— his past as The Winter Soldier torturing his soul. He was so convinced he wasn’t deserving of anything, not even a roof over his head. It was a struggle to help him, but you weren’t going to give up on him.
“You realize if anything ever happened to you I—” Your voice broke, needing a breath, “Buck I wouldn’t know what to do with myself.”
You thought you saw his eyes flash with guilt, but before you could linger on the look for too long— his face was hardening again.
“That doesn’t sound like my problem.” He mumbled out, making your eyes widen.
You were extremely taken back from those words, your chest aching painfully— him not knowing what effect those words had on you.
“Are you fucking serious?” You asked him, your face morphing into a hurt expression, mixed with anger. “Can you just do your job without trying to kill yourself?”
His face grew red with rage and he was stomping up towards you— his face inches from yours.
“I am doing my job— very well in fact. Unlike you who just fucking sits here doing nothing!” He defended himself, his breath hitting your face in warm pants.
“Doing nothing? Buck— why are you like this?” You puffed your chest, not backing down from his towering form.
But your words seemed to have hit a nerve, as he shrunk back slightly, narrowing his gaze at you.
“Like what?”
You furrowed your brows, slowing your racing heart from the shouting— you weren’t sure you had said anything bad. Did you?
“What?” You squeaked out, nervous now.
“You said, why am I like this… like what?” He pushed, stepping closer to you now, his face still red with anger but you could see the hurt in his eyes.
You swallowed and wondered how to convince him you didn’t mean anything bad by what you said. But you were almost positive it would be an impossible task to get Bucky to listen.
“Buck, I didn’t mean anythin—”
“What— you think I’m not capable of doing my job? You think I’m still the monster hydra made me?” He spat, his chest rising and falling quicker.
“No, no Buck listen—”
That was definitely not what you meant, you could tell he was spiraling and you were still confused as to why. You would never make him think that.
“After 70 fucking years I finally have a job that I like— that I enjoy doing— I fucking help people! I’m finally doing some good and now you’re telling me I’m not capable of doing it?” He boomed, his chest puffing into yours and your stumbled back slightly. “You think I’m only capable of being a monster? Huh? Is that what you fucking think?”
You were growing scared now, the look in his eyes wild with something and you didn’t like how close he was to you— you knew he’d never hurt you but your fear overwhelmed your senses.
“Friday— call Steve and Sam in here now!” You shouted into the room, and Bucky’s eyes squinted painfully— his metal arm whirring again.
Bucky only saw one thing— you didn’t reassure him that he was thinking irrationally. You didn’t correct him that he wasn’t the monster. Instead you called for help, that you were clearly scared— because you thought he was a monster.
He was at a loss for words and just stared at you, almost through you— as his breathing was only getting heavier at the sight of your fearful eyes.
Not even minutes later, Steve and Sam were busting through the door, taking in the scene and separated you and Bucky.
“Hey— what’s going on?” Steve asked in between the two of you. “Buck, what’s wrong man?”
You couldn’t seem to find the words and just stood speechless as well— the fight startling you. This was one of the worst ones, and it was also one that still left you confused. You cursed yourself for not being careful enough with your words— but it was almost impossible to get through to him when he was on the brink of having an episode.
Sam walked closer to you, his facing morphing into concern as he took in your shocked expression.
“(Y/n)? You okay? Did he hurt you?” Sam whispered, keeping his words only between you two.
You slowly shook your head but still didn’t respond verbally.
“Okay, okay that’s good. You wanna go get a drink from downstairs? Why don’t we take a breather okay?” Sam suggested softly, big brother mode kicking in at the sight of your frazzled state.
Without another word, you left the room with Sam— missing the devastated look from Bucky.
Steve waited until the door shut, then his attention was back on Bucky.
“Buck, you gotta talk to me man— what happened?” He asked softly, watching his friend slowly relax, but it wasn’t from being in a relaxing mood— his body and mind were just exhausted from the argument.
“I fucked everything up. That’s what happened.” He mumbled, turning away from Steve to sit on the edge of his bed.
Steve followed behind but stood in front of him, shaking his head— ready to argue.
“You didn’t mess anything up, arguments happen. You guys will work it out. I know how much you mean to each other.” Steve pointed out, watching Bucky’s face unchanging.
“You didn’t see the way she looked at me— she’s scared of me I—” He shuttered, his breath shaky as he remembered your look, “I fucking scared her.”
Steve’s chest ached, the state of his friend breaking his heart. He knew Bucky meant no harm, and he almost for a fact knew that you knew that too. But Bucky for sure didn’t believe that himself.
“I didn’t see what you saw, but I can guarantee you that she’s not afraid of you. This is (Y/n) we are talking about. You are her world Buck.” Steve tried to convince him.
Bucky shook his head, running his flesh hand through his hair.
“I think I just need to stay away from her for awhile.” Bucky came up with instead.
Steve immediately started shaking his head, knowing that was the last thing he needed.
“Bucky I—”
“Please Steve… I just need some space.” Bucky pleaded, his body sagging in exhaustion.
Steve couldn’t find it in himself to argue with him anymore about this. Maybe he did need some time to himself, to cool down and gather his thoughts. Also Steve wasn’t going to force him to anything ever. After the years his pal went through— he would never make him do anything. He had enough things decided for him, and Steve wasn’t about to stoop to hydra’s level.
Meanwhile down in the kitchen, Sam was getting you a glass of water— standing across from your seated form at the island. He slid the cup across, sending a worried glance at you.
“(Y/n)?” Sam snapped his fingers getting your attention.
You were shaken from your state of staring, but even snapped out of the trance— the anxieties still swirled within you.
“Yeah sorry… I’m here.” You whispered, grabbing the glass and taking a tiny sip.
Sam gave you a quizzical expression, watching you start to slip back into a mindless stare— so he spoke up.
“You wanna tell me what happened?” He asked, genuinely curious what had went down.
He knew— hell everyone knew you and Bucky were extremely close. Best of friends, always there for one another— dancing on the line of strictly friends to lovers. Truthfully, Sam found it completely obnoxious and just wanted you two together already.
“I don’t really know… I think I said the wrong thing— I didn’t mean to make him upset.” You confessed, keeping your eyes on the countertop, not risking a glance to Sam.
“Hey, don’t beat yourself up— mistakes happen. I’m sure he’ll forgive you.” Sam told you.
You shook your head, gripping the cup tighter.
“God I hope so… I don’t know what I’d do without him.” You whispered pathetically, tears welling in your eyes.
Sam reached out to rub your arm comfortingly, trying to relax you so you didn’t start crying. He hated to see you cry— made his heart hurt.
“It’s been a long day for everyone, why don’t you go head upstairs and get some sleep. I’m sure things will have blown over by tomorrow.” He suggested and you finally met his gaze, smiling weakly and nodding.
Without saying goodbye, you stood up and headed to your room. Taking Sam’s words and playing them on repeat in your head.
Tomorrow is another day, tomorrow would be better.
God had you hoped that was the case— it only was the beginning on the torment.
You had slept in longer than usual, but overall felt refreshed. The first thing that came to mind when fully waking up was Bucky. Immediately you headed downstairs to find him— needing to talk with him— apologize.
Making it down to the kitchen, you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding in at the sight of him sitting at the island— sipping at his coffee. You furrowed your brows, thinking he'd be done with his coffee by now, since you had slept in. Your chest ached with guilt with the possibility that he didn't sleep well.
You took a deep breath before making yourself known, although you were sure be could sense you in the room— considering he was a super soldier.
"Morning Buck." You announced, walking around the island so you could face him.
He kept his gaze down at his coffee, finding the cup more interesting than you.
Okay, that’s fair. You thought, you most probably deserved that reaction.
“You sleep okay?” You asked again, picking at the skin on your nails nervously.
Again— he didn’t even lift his head. In fact, he wasn’t even acknowledging you. You waited several minutes for a response, the silence becoming thick with tension and you couldn’t stand it.
“Bucky?” You tried, and this time he lifted his head.
Your heart twinged in your chest at his bloodshot eyes, clear evidence that he hadn’t gotten good sleep. You hated yourself for causing him the stress, especially knowing he was just starting to actually get hours of sleep. It was huge progress compared to his nights either screaming awake or just staring at the walls. But now you had to go and ruin all that progress. You felt sick to your stomach— disgusted with yourself.
“I’m really sorry about last night… I didn’t like how ugly it got and I’m sorry if I said something to upset you— you know I’d never intentionally hurt you.” You told him, picking more aggressively at your nails, causing to nail beds to bleed.
You swallowed nervously when he didn’t answer right away, instead staring at you with… what was that? Disgust? You didn’t know, but you hated the look altogether.
“Bucky, please say something.” You pleaded.
Bucky lowered his gaze to his coffee again, taking a minute before he stood up and looked your way.
“I just need some space.” He told you quietly.
You were relived to have him finally talk to you, but to hear him suggest space between you two— you could almost feel the knife digging into your chest. You tried to keep a neutral expression but otherwise felt your bottom lip quiver.
Without giving you time to respond, Bucky was walking out of the room— leaving you standing there speechless, lungs begging for air. You didn’t want your mind to go immediately to that thought, but you couldn’t ignore it either— he hated you.
“Hey babe, I need you to help me out in the lab tod—” Tony came busting into the room, but immediately shut up once he saw your broken expression. “Honey, what’s wrong? You alright?”
You nodded your head, lying to him and yourself and started waving him off with the fakest smile.
“Yeah— yeah I’m good. Just need to uh— need to get some things done.” You told him, your eyes darting all around the room, the familiar feeling of panic seeping into your being.
Tony gave you a ‘really?’ look and stepped closer to you.
“(Y/n) I’m not blind— I can see you’re upset. Talk to m—”
“Seriously Tony— I’m fine! Just leave it alone!” You told him a little too aggressively.
His face was taken back and you felt guilty immediately, cursing yourself for hurting everyone.
Why are you such a fucking issue? Your mind screamed at you.
You didn’t waste another second and sped walked out of the room, needing to calm yourself down before you ran into any one else. You were spiraling and you needed to just relax— take a deep breath. Maybe you just needed one more day and things would be back to normal.
Yeah… just one more day.
You had hoped that was the case as well… but as always— things only got worse.
Bucky refused to talk to you or even look at you. He’d given you the cold shoulder for almost two weeks now. He would get up and leave the second you entered the room. He couldn’t stand you it seemed.
You couldn’t keep hiding your hurt. At first, you had done a good job at hiding how you were really feeling. Saving the sobbing and attacks for when you were alone in your room. As the days lingered on, you found yourself weak and drained— you didn’t have enough energy to put up a charade anymore.
The whole team were sending you worried looks, and attempted to talk with you. But the second they’d try— you’d bolt. The subject was too sensitive, too raw. You didn’t want to talk to anyone but Bucky— and he hated you.
You had missed so many meals, forgetting to eat with your mental struggles throughout the days. You had been getting no more than two hours of sleep. You were so stressed, so stuck in your own mind that you couldn’t function. Even when you had managed to remember to eat, your stomach would knot up to the point that you were throwing everything up. You were gaunt, basically a real life zombie. You needed help— but you needed Bucky more.
You were laying in bed staring unknowingly into space, it had been hard to focus with no food or sleep in your system— so you had only managed to lay here. Even that was exhausting, no matter how much you laid around— your mind wouldn’t stop the assault. Your anxiety had never been this bad, you were a prisoner to it.
Knocking at your door had you jumping, your heart racing— and for a moment you forgot where you were.
You’re in the compound… yeah that’s right.
You slowed your breathing and swung your legs sluggishly over the edge of the bed to answer it. You weren’t prepared for the sudden dizzy spell, your vision spotting with black and white specks. You tried to blink it off, but suddenly you were toppling to the ground.
You fell to the floor with a loud thump, luckily landing on your front, your hands somehow catching most of your fall— you could already feel the throbbing in your palms.
You didn’t hear the persistent knocking, or the door open. You didn’t even hear the voice speaking from the doorway. It was when a hand landed on your shoulder that you were gasping, forgetting your surroundings once again.
Your eyes met Steve’s and you swore your heart was about to beat out of your chest.
“(Y/n) are you alright?” He asked you, hovering his hands over you— not sure what you had hurt.
You furrowed your brows, looking him over.
“Steve what are… what are you doing here?” You asked genuinely confused.
You watched Steve’s eyes widen and he swallowed nervously— his expression growing more concerned.
“(Y/n) it’s okay… I’ve got you.” Steve hushed, and he was pulling you into his chest, hugging you protectively.
You were still confused but then you tasted one of your stray tears, and you immediately came to your senses. You were crying in Steve’s arms… but why? You were having gaps of time missing from you, this wasn’t the first time this had happened— you just didn’t seem to care.
“Steve… my head hurts.” You slurred into his chest, sagging against him.
You were grateful that he was here, you desperately needed someone around. You were just hoping that someone would’ve been Bucky.
“Okay, let’s get you to Helen. She’s gonna take care of you, okay?” Steve asked you, and you could only give a weak nod.
He knew there was no way you were walking there, so he hoisted you up into his arms, and cradled your head as he started to the med bay.
You just stared blankly at his chest, not really caring if Steve were to throw you off the roof of the building. You just didn’t care.
Steve had gotten you down to her, and she checked you out. Alerting Steve that you were extremely malnourished, dehydrated— an insomniac. She kept listing off all the things Steve was afraid to hear. The whole time he was sure you didn’t hear a thing, although you were in the room— you were just checked out.
Helen eventually left, and Steve took his opportunity to speak with you. He pulled up a chair next to the hospital bed and grabbed your hand.
“(Y/n), what’s going on? You can talk to me— you can’t keep doing this to yourself. Please… just talk to me.” Steve whispered, pleading with you that you would stop torturing yourself.
“He hates me.” You mumbled.
Steve’s eyes widened and he frowned, knowing what you meant. He knew he let this go on for too long.
“(Y/n) he doesn’t hate you. He just needed time to himself, so he co—”
“I didn’t mean to hurt his feelings, I don’t even know what I said to hurt him but I—” You rushed out, the heart monitor beeping frantically, “I’m a horrible person, I didn’t mean to— I didn’t mean to!”
You wheezed out, clutching your chest as you couldn’t catch your breath. Your cheeks glistened with a steady stream of tears, your wheezing only growing by the second.
“Okay, okay (Y/n)— I need you to slow your breathing. You’re okay, he doesn’t hate you. Just take deep breaths okay— even if you can’t just try. I’m here.” He tried to coach you, but this wasn’t his thing.
Now he was starting to get mad at his friend, Bucky shouldn’t of let this go on for this long.
You followed his chest rising and falling, staring at him as he tried to calm you down. Your breaths were heavy and painful sounding. Steve was about to say something but stopped himself when he saw your eyes look behind him.
He turned and saw Bucky standing in the doorway— his face paled. Truthfully, he looked like he was going to be sick.
“(Y/n)?” He whispered, his heart breaking at your state.
He had ran into Helen in the kitchen and was informed of your condition— he didn’t believe it and had to see for himself. He was shocked to find you like this.
Your tears only edged on from his appearance and you shook your head in shame.
“I’m sorry Bucky! Whatever I did, I’m sorry!” You sobbed and Bucky ran to the bed, kneeling down and taking your hands into his.
“Doll it’s okay, you’re okay. I’m here— I’m here. I’m not gonna leave you… I’m sorry.” He rushed out, shushing your cries, watching you slow your breathing at his words. “There we go, just keep breathing with me. I’m here, you’re okay.”
He kept repeating himself, making sure you knew he wasn’t going anywhere.
Steve knew you were in good hands and slowly snuck out of the room— knowing you two needed to talk.
Bucky tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear, letting his fingers trail down your cheek to your jaw. You couldn’t help the way your face leaned into his touch, it felt like it had been forever since the last one.
Your breathing had slowed down, and now you just stared up at him— eyes glossy with more tears. You felt so many emotions. You felt relived, but also angry and hurt. Above all— you needed to know what you did to upset him. The guilt still ate away at your heart, and even just the memory of the argument had your chest aching.
“What did I do?” You whispered, making his eyes shoot up to yours, concern painting his face.
“You didn’t do anything.” He told you, and you furrowed your brows.
You were still anxious— he hadn’t answered your question. Even more so— if you didn’t do anything then why did he ignore you?
“Then why?”
“Why what (Y/n)?” He dared to ask, and you scoffed— ripping your hands out of his.
The anger was approaching.
“Why did you shut me out?” You wondered, and he only let his eyes cast down to the bed— making you angrier. “You ignored me for two weeks! Two fucking weeks you just acted as if I didn’t exist! Do you know how much that fucking hurts?”
You were breathing heavy again, but this time it wasn’t from panic— it was the full force of all your anger bursting out.
He lifted his eyes to you, and you saw how broken he looked. How your state had affected him.
“I could never do that to you Buck— I would never do that to you! You’re my everything! I don’t trust anyone as much as I trust you!” You raised your voice, while he stayed silent. “If I didn’t do anything then why would you— why—”
You broke out into a sob, covering your face with your hands. You felt good getting all the built up anger out— but now you felt extremely guilty. The pitiful face of Bucky staring at you, causing your heart to hurt all over again. It didn’t matter what happened, you always ended up hurting others.
“(Y/n) I’m so sorry I— god I fucked up. I didn’t ever mean to hurt you, please know that. You’re my other half, and no one has ever been there for me like you have.” He spoke through a tight throat, swelling with emotion.
You uncovered your face and just stared at him a little longer, still incredibly hurt from his actions— but you knew you couldn’t stay mad at him. You so badly wanted to forgive and forget— and just wrap him in your arms like you both needed.
“It’s hard to explain what’s wrong with me to someone when I don’t even understand what’s wrong with me— I just know I’m fucked up. I’m broken beyond repair.” His voice broke, his own eyes welling with tears.
You didn’t have it in you to keep up an angry facade, and so you reached out and took his hand in yours. His face almost immediately lit up, his breathing slowing at your touch.
“Try me.” You whispered, watching Bucky take a deep breath before he spoke again.
“The night of our fight…” He started, and you swallowed in having to remember that night. “I had never seen you look at me like that.”
You stayed silent, afraid to open your mouth and have a sob escape. You could feel it bubbling up— the memory playing back through your mind.
“You looked at me like you were scared. You looked at me like I was a monster.” He confessed and it all made sense to you now.
It wasn’t about what you said, it was your reaction that disturbed him to no ends. Even if you couldn’t control your reaction in the moment— you still felt guilty for causing him pain of remembering the hydra days.
“Oh Buck…” You whimpered, trying to pull him close— but he pulled away before he could reach your embrace.
“No— you don’t get to be nice to me after what I did. I promised I would never hurt you and I did— you’re in here because of me! I don’t deserve your forgiveness!” He raised his voice, and you weren’t scared of him— just concerned.
“I wasn’t scared of you Bucky, you just caught me off guard. Things were heated— I’m not afraid of you and I most definitely don’t think you’re a monster.” You tried to convince him.
“I really hope you’re not lying because if you were afraid of me… god I don’t know what I’d do. If you never wanted to see me again— that’s fine. Whatever you want, but I can’t live knowing you’re afraid of me.” He whimpered out.
“I wouldn’t lie to you.”
He nodded his head, knowing damn well you’d never lie. That was one thing he loved about you— you were so honest. Keeping it real with him, even if he didn’t wanna hear it. He could count on you for the truth.
“I still don’t deserve your forgiveness.” He argued.
“Well too bad, I’m forgiving you anyway.” You finally told him and he felt his chest expand.
Like he could finally breath.
“Why?” He wondered.
You knew it was the line you two had been dancing on forever— but you knew if there was ever a time to say it. It was now.
“Because I love you.” You admitted quietly.
His eyes widened just slightly, and his breath stuttered. He had always had a feeling what you two had was more than friends, he just never spoke up about it. Of course he loves you too— god he loves you so much. That’s why the thought of you being scared of him was enough to pull him away. He couldn’t bear being around you if you were frightened by him. He couldn’t live with himself. More importantly he now discovered, he really couldn’t live without you.
“I love you so much.” He confessed back as your tears leaked down your cheeks.
You pulled his arm, and he let you pull him to the bed— close enough where you could cup both his cheeks.
“Don’t ever do that to me again, please. I need you Bucky— life is not livable without you.” You cried, kissing his forehead to which he leaned into your lips.
“Never again— I promise.”
This time, he wouldn’t break it.
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#bucky barnes#sebastian stan#the winter soldier#marvel cinematic universe#reader insert#buckybarnes#marvel imagines#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes angst#protective bucky barnes#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x female reader#hurt/comfort fic#james buchanan barnes#beefy bucky barnes#theleggymeggy fics#fluffy#heavy angst#I write so much sadness I swear im okay#thank you for requesting!
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Chapter 12- I Love You. I Know.
Summary: As the end of October approaches, you and Javi learn more about celebrating Halloween and Dia De Los Muertos together. After a sleepless night, and a Halloween party at the Murphy's, Javi begins to open up to you about his past.
Word Count: 15.6K (I'm sweating)
Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected p in v sex (don't be silly, wrap your willy), oral (m receiving), vaginal fingering, creampie, praise kink, semi-public sex (Oh the poor Murphy's...), PTSD/Anxiety around grief, loss and Javi's past, some angst/tension, mentions of drinking/being drunk (Steve is getting PLASTERED), mentions of food/eating, SO MANY STAR WARS REFERENCES, literally this chapter made me sob while I was writing it, editing it, and re-reading it, I am SO sorry
A/N: You guys. Holy shit. This chapter really had me in my feels. This chapter was def a labor of love, but I'm really happy with how it turned out!! Thank you for as always for all you kind words, you truly, truly, TRULY have no idea how much your support means to me 😭💖 Also please don't kill me after you finish reading this chapter I PROMISE *things* are happening so soon I can literally taste it, but I needed for this chapter to happen first, and you would be silly to think that *things* didn't get its own whole ass chapter and I am just as excited as you AH
Series Masterlist Next Chapter Previous Chapter
The excitement of October’s conclusion was in the air, and the joys of getting to celebrate what you hoped would be the first of many holidays with Javi was at the forefront of your mind. While the end of summer meant school was here and your carefree days were gone until next June, October meant it was time for one of your favorite holidays- Halloween. It was one of your most cherished things to celebrate as a kid, and even still as an adult. The memories of jumping into leaf piles off your swingset with your brothers, dressing up in goofy, homemade costumes to trick-or-treat (because your mom was not about to buy 4 new sets of costumes every single year), carving pumpkins, and stealing as many of your brother’s Kit Kat bars as you could without getting caught, filled your heart with a warmth and joy that you couldn’t quite describe. While the 80 degree temperatures and lack of bright reds and yellows painted across the leaves falling from their trees was much different from the Chicago Octobers you were accustomed to, it hadn’t stopped you from heading full steam into Halloween.
“So do you have any thoughts on what we should be for Steve and Connie’s? I have no problem going out to buy stuff for costumes, but I can already hear my mom yelling at me for wasting my money on cheaply made clothes I’m gonna wear for 5 hours when I have something perfectly good in my closet.” You rolled your eyes as you shuffled through the hangers, Javi sitting on the edge of your bed folding the laundry you were working on putting away.
The two of you had gladly accepted the invitation from Steve and Connie to spend the weekend with them in San Antonio, as the Murphy’s planned to host a Halloween party at their house for their friends and co-workers, giving you and Javi a chance to have a fun weekend out of town together.
“Hmmmm?” He asked, looking up at you as you grabbed a few shirts, examining them for costume potential. “We’re dressing up for this thing?”
“Yeah, that’s like, the whole point of Halloween, dummy.” You giggled, throwing a few options on the floor before making your way over to your pants. “Didn’t you dress up as a kid for Halloween?”
Unlike yourself, Javi had spent his whole life celebrating Día de los Muertos, Halloween having nowhere near as much relevance to him as it did to you, spending the end of October and first days of November gathering with his family to spend the day making Pan de Muerto (Day of the Dead sweet bread), watching the parades on the streets of Downtown Laredo before visiting the cemetery where his grandparents were buried, decorating their graves in cempasúchil (marigold flowers), candles and photographs with his primos (cousins). Since his mom had passed, Javi hadn’t been home to celebrate with his family, and had almost forgone the tradition completely during his time in Colombia, the pain and loss of his mother and the solemn sadness of celebrating alone leading him to try his best to forget about the holiday all together.
“Uh, no, not, not really. Didn’t really do Halloween, isn’t really as much of a thing down here. My family always celebrated Día de Los Muertos instead.” He replied, almost embarrassed by his answer, not wanting to damper your excitement as you dug through your closet for costumes.
Your heart sank to your stomach, feeling awful that you hadn’t even taken into consideration that Javi's traditions around this time of year were completely different from what you were used to. The two of you had never really talked about how you wanted to celebrate future holidays, and always had wanted to make sure that the important parts of your lives were celebrated equally. Javi hadn’t said anything after you had spent the past few days putting up Halloween decorations around your apartment, and now you felt like an idiot assuming he had spent his whole life celebrating just like you.
“Oh… Shit. Javi, I’m so sorry, if you don’t wanna do costumes, we don’t have to, you just hadn’t said anything about Día de Los Muertos so I just assumed that-”
“Baby, it’s okay.” He pushed himself up off the bed, the width of his broad palms wrapping around your hips, trying to ease the guilt he could tell was rapidly consuming you. “You’re right, I never told you about it. It’s been a long time since I’ve done anything to celebrate it, and I haven’t been home for it since I’ve gotten back from Colombia. I just- I don’t really know how to feel about it, I guess. The last time I did anything for it was before my mom died. I was never able to bring myself to do anything about it while I was gone, and I guess now I just feel really shitty that was the way I decided to handle it.” It broke your heart to see the pain in his eyes, pulling yourself closer to him as you wrapped your arms around his stomach, leaning your head against his chest. It was then, the realization had hit you too- This would be your first year of holidays without Patrick. You didn’t know as much as you would have liked to about Día de Los Muertos, but you did know that it was to celebrate the lives of loved ones you’d lost, a feeling that you and Javi were both all too familiar with.
“Listen…” You raised your head, looking up at him, arms still intertwined around his waist. “I don’t- I don’t wanna make you do anything that you’re uncomfortable with. I guess this is the first time we’ve ever really talked about this kind of stuff. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you, Jav, and that means celebrating the things that are special to both of us. The things that are important to you are important to me too. I want our lives for us, for our future family, to be filled with all the things we care the most about, whether that means keeping old traditions or making our own new ones. It would mean a lot to me to get to celebrate Día de los Muertos with you, and if it’s okay, I would love to sprinkle in some Halloween too, because I’m fucking dying to carve a pumpkin.”
You smiled up at him as his hand slid under your jaw, his thumb tracing across your cheek as he tried his best to hold back the tears welling in his eyes. It took everything in him to not ruin his plans, wanting to run into the bedroom, grab the ring out of his sock drawer and propose to you that very instant. Even after all this time, Javi still couldn't believe that he was the person you wanted to share the rest of your life with. That you wanted to intertwine your past, present, and future with his, to have a life, a family, together that the two of you could cherish forever. Never in a million years had he assumed he’d be anywhere close to where he was today, holding the world’s most beautiful, perfect woman in his arms, as she told him how she wanted nothing more than to build a family and spend the rest of her days with him.
“Osita… I fucking love you so much, you know that?” He leaned in, his lips meeting yours in a soft and deep kiss, your heart racing as he pulled you in tighter.
“Yeah, I mean, I guess, just a little bit…” You giggled, poking fun at him, considering not a day had passed since the first night he had said it that Javi hadn’t told you just how much he loved you.
“Shut up, you dork.” He chuckled, making you squeal as he picked you up, playfully shaking you in his grasp before setting you back down. “I’d love nothing more, Hermosa. I don’t know how the fuck you’re supposed to carve a pumpkin or what the hell you have planned for these costumes, but I’m all in. I want it all with you, Osita. Thank you.”
“Of course. For as much or as little as you want to do for Día de los Muertos, I’m all in too. I’m gonna be honest, I love Hallowen. Not as much as Christmas, but it’s a close second. It means you’re gonna have to trust me with a giant ass knife and cover yourself in pumpkin guts, though.”
“My trust is quickly starting to fade. Seriously though, what the hell are we supposed to dress up as?” He raised an eyebrow at you, nodding over to the pile of clothes you had pulled from your closet, now piled on the floor.
“Don’t worry, I’ve got some ideas.”
The weeks leading up to the holidays had made for fun at home date nights, the both of you genuinely looking forward to learning about the traditions you had both held so dear to your hearts. Almost every night after work, you had done something to celebrate the events leading up to the day. You had shown Javi a few of your favorite Halloween movies, including It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, Beetlejuice, and Ghostbusters, very adamantly insisting to him that those movies were about as scary as you were going to get, blaming your brothers for scarring you after forcing you to watch The Exorcist at the ripe age of 7 years old. In addition to the movies, you had told him about other funny Trick-Or-Treating stories from your childhood, Javi’s favorite being how your brothers, (being the ruthless idiots they were) paid one of their friends in all of their halloween candy to jump out of a bush dressed as a terrifying old lady to scare the absolute shit out of you, and making you quite literally pee your pants. In return Javi shared his favorite memories of cooking in the kitchen with his mom as she made Pan de Muertos for his family, the two of you even attempting to make it one of the nights after work, milling about the kitchen together as Javi told you about his family you had yet to meet, or had passed away long before you.
After a lengthy hunt, you were able to find pumpkins, bringing them to Chucho’s house to carve them since you had nowhere to put them inside your apartment. You offered him the rest of your Pan de Muertos in exchange for a place to work on your pumpkins, and while he gladly accepted the bread, the three of you knew Chucho was always happy to have you and Javi over, regardless.
“So tell me, mija,” Chucho spoke in between mouthfuls of sweet bread, rocking back and forth in his chair, “is there a meaning behind carving the pumpkins, or is it just for fun?”
“Just for fun! Okay, it looks like we’re ready, you want me to show you how to do it, or just let you go for it?” You smiled at Javi, the two of you sitting cross legged on Chucho’s porch, pumpkins open in front of you.
“You just scoop them out, right?” Javi questioned, looking into the pumpkin with an unsure grimace. “It seems like there's a lot in here, Osita. I have to get all of it out?”
“Yeah, or else you can’t see the design when you carve it. C’mon you big baby, just stick your hand in there and pull the guts out!” You laughed, digging your hand into your pumpkin, scooping out hearty globs of pumpkin guts, slopping them into the bucket Chucho had set out for you. Reluctantly, Javi joined, you and Chucho both absolutely dying at Javi’s face as his hand met the squishy fibers inside his pumpkin.
“Jesus, that feels fucking gross!” He laughed, shaking his head as he threw some of the seeds and strings into the trash next to him.
“You need me to do it for you?” You giggled, flicking a pumpkin seed at him as he winced with the second handful he pulled out.
“No, cabrón (asshole), I can do it.” Javi grumbled as he rolled his eyes at you, the both of you scooping hearty handfuls of goop.
“You hear that, Chucho? Calling me an asshole because he’s too scared to pull out pumpkin guts.” You looked back at his dad, giving him a playful grin, his smile already wide from the enjoyment of watching the two of you. With your back turned to Javi, you hadn’t noticed the small handful of seeds he had collected in his hand, lining up his arm to aim right at the back of your head. “I can’t believe that- HEY!” You whipped your neck around, running your hand over the back of your neck, picking seeds and strings out of your hair, seeing Javi snicker to himself as your jaw dropped open in shock. “Did you seriously just throw pumpkin guts at me?!”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, must have been a ghost.” He shrugged, smirking to himself before digging his hand back into his pumpkin.
“You see this?!” You looked back at Chucho, pointing your finger at Javi, pretending to be stern, although your laughter quickly escaped. “Absolutely ridiculous, I swear.”
“Javier, that is no way to treat your future esposa! (Wife) No quiero mis nietos ser cubierto en calabaza! Me encantáran en cualquier caso, pero todavía! (I don’t want my future grandchildren covered in pumpkin! I will love them either way, but still!)” Chucho scolded with a smirk, you and Javi silently smiling to each other at the thought of one day doing this with your own children. Javi had tried to stop fighting off his dad’s comments about grandkids a while ago- Chucho knew just as well as the two of you that he would have his grandchildren soon enough.
“Ella lo pído… (She asked for it…)” Javi muttered under his breath, shooting his gaze up at you as he felt cold goop hit the side of his cheek, wiping the pumpkin you had just thrown at him off with the back of his hand, watching you smirk silently to yourself as you continued to scoop out your pumpkin.
“Ahora… Estamos a mano. (And now… We’re even.)”
The 3 of you chatted on the porch, the sky now painted a dark black, filled with twinkling constellations above as you finished carving your pumpkins. Yours, a cute ghost with a little smiley face, and Javi’s, what he had tried to convince you and Chucho was also a ghost, even though it looked more like he had just carved a squiggly hole in the middle of his. It took a little prodding and convincing, but as you all talked about how the Peña family had spent many a Día de los Muertos, you and Chucho were able to get Javi to agree to go visit his mom’s gravesite on the Sunday after you got back from Steve and Connie’s party. Chucho had even promised to keep his tias, tios, and primos (aunts, uncles, and cousins) completely out of the picture this year, wanting to give Javi all the time and space he needed to go see his mom for the first time since her funeral. He was reluctant at first, riddled with the guilt of leaving her unvisited all these years, but as he felt the gentle squeeze of your hand, your silent reassurance was all he needed to know that you would be by his side, every step of the way. As you said your goodbyes, Chucho hugged you just a little extra tighter than normal, as if to thank you for everything you had done for his son, and just how thankful he was to have you in his life, too.
Even though the Murphy’s had very graciously offered to let you and Javi stay on Friday night as well as Saturday, both Steve and Connie very much understood when you had told them on the phone that the only thing that you wanted to do after coming home from the chaos of managing an elementary school Halloween party was take a very, very long nap. You and Javi had spent the night ordering pizza and watching Young Frankenstein, only lasting about 20 minutes into the movie before you were dead asleep, snoring against Javi’s chest, still dressed in If You Give A Mouse A Cookie costume from earlier today. Carrying you to bed and undressing you from your mouse ears and oversized overalls, Javi curled into bed next to you, pulling your body against his as he stared at the ceiling. Despite how hard he tried to fall asleep, he laid there, wide awake as ever, as his head raced with the tornado of thoughts brewing inside his brain.
Javier Peña had never really considered himself to be an anxious person. For most of his life, he couldn’t be. For the sake of his job, the sake of his family after his Mom passed, Javi had survived the only way he had known how- Block it out, and ignore it. And so far, that strategy had seemed to bode for him pretty darn well. But that was before he had anyone who depended on him, cared about him, anyone who made his life worth living for. That was before he had met you. Now, Javi found himself at the crossroads of a moment he had been waiting for since the moment he had first laid eyes on you. Something that brought him absolute joy and sheer terror at the same time- Javier Peña was going to propose to you, and he was an anxious fucking mess.
If that in itself wasn’t enough, things at the Laredo County Sheriff's Department had been an absolute shit show. Mexico was the only thing on anyone’s radar, making for long days and high tension at the office, trying to do anything to slow the spread of the cartel’s influence across the border. Day after day, report after report, it felt like the department was drowning in the endless shitty news of new death tolls, record breaking trafficking stats, and lack of control as cocaine moved across the Rio Grande at a groundbreaking pace. Even though he found himself even further removed from Mexico than he ever was in Colombia, he couldn’t help but feel that painful, searing wrench in his gut when he sat down to really think about it.
You.
Spending your lives together.
Having a family.
Protecting his wife and kids.
The things he would do to keep you safe.
The terrible things he had done he had justified were keeping other people safe.
The imagines of the things he wish he could unsee.
The pain and hurt he wished he could take back.
The fear of what he was capable of doing.
So with a knot in his chest from work, a ring hidden away in his sock drawer, and the beginnings of a plan to ask the woman he loved more than life itself to marry him, Javi coped with the weight of his stress the only way he knew how. He couldn’t fucking sleep.
The thoughts played in his mind on repeat, torturing him with every loop around his brain. He tried his best to close his eyes, to empty his head for a moment of peace, but no matter how much he wished he could have willed himself to sleep, it was no use. By the time the alarm clock on his nightstand read 2:05 AM, Javi had completely given up on the idea of rest for the night, quietly making his way out of bed to go wander around the living room. It wasn’t long before you too were also awake, rolling over in your sleep to find Javi’s space in the bed cold and empty. Rubbing your eyes and propping yourself up against your pillow, you scanned around the darkness of your room as you came to, realizing that Javi was nowhere to be found. Draping one of the blankets from your bed over you, you crept into the hallway, greeted by the soft light of one of the living room lamps painting shadows against the wall.
“Javi, are you up?” Your voice still soft and sleepy, rubbing your hand along your face, squinting from the sudden brightness that lit up the room.
“Osita, baby, did I wake you up? I'm so sorry. Go back to bed, okay?” Javi shot up from the couch, setting down whatever book he had been half focused on reading as he watched your bed headed figure meander into the living room.
“No, it’s okay.” You grumbled, holding out your blanket covered arms for Javi to melt his body into yours, wrapping you in a tight hug. You pressed your head into the bare skin of his chest, snaking your hands around his waist as he planted his lips against the the top of your head, burying his nose in your tangled hair. “Baby, what’s going on? Why can’t you sleep? I’m worried about you, Jav.”
“I’m… Yeah, I’m okay, Hermosa. Just a lot on my mind.” He sighed, his exhale still buried in your hair as he savored the smell of you, still lingering even in your sleepy state.
His pause alone was enough to know okay wasn’t the word that you would use to describe Javi right now. His words were burdened and fatigued, making it clear that whatever was on his mind was weighing on him more heavily than he wanted to admit.
“Are you sure? Javi, if you wanna talk about anything, you know I’m always here, right?”
You wanted so desperately to pry. Everything in you had a feeling that whatever was keeping him up were entangled in the parts of his dark parts past, the last secrets holding up the final wall between the two of you. You knew from your brothers how hard it was to talk about the pain and suffering they had witnessed, and begging them to talk about it before they were ready only seemed to make it worse. Hell, after Patrick died, it felt like you didn’t sleep for weeks, and it had taken you months to open up about it. You knew Javi hurt, and as much as you wanted to, digging deeper into the things that plagued him in his restless nights wasn’t what he needed right now. Right now, he just needed someone to be there for him.
“Is there anything I can do, Javi? I just wanna help.” The breath of your sympathetic whispers were hot against Javi’s skin, squeezing your arms to pull him as close to you as he could. He paused for a moment, letting out another deep breath as cradled the back of your head with his palm, running his hands through your hair.
“Will- Will you stay up with me? Just a little bit longer?” His voice trembled as you turned your head to lock your eyes with his, the gentle nod of your head bringing him a moment of relief.
“Of course, baby. Of course I’ll stay up with you. Do you wanna turn on the TV or put on a movie? Sometimes that helps me sleep.” You stretched your arms over your head, scrunching your face as you yawned before tugging your blanket tighter around your body.
“Believe me, Hermosa, I know it does.” He let out a soft chuckle as he pressed a soft kiss against your forehead.
“Oh shit, yeah that is true. I don’t even think I made it halfway through Young Frankenstein tonight, which is a crime. It’s such a good movie. I don’t even remember getting into bed.” You yawned again, this time taking one of your blanket covered fists to try and rub the sleep out of your eyes, forcing yourself to stay awake.
“Well, if you give a mouse pizza and a movie after a long day at school, then she’ll probably need her boyfriend to carry her to bed because she’s so tired.” Now awake enough, Javi’s cute jab at your costume for school made you let out a little giggle, giving him a little shove with your blanket wrapped body. “Why don’t we turn the rest of it on, so you can finish watching?”
“I don’t wanna fall asleep on you, Javi.” You grumbled, pouting up at him, considering he had just asked you to stay awake with him.
“It’s okay. As long as I have you by me, I’ll be alright, I promise.” Reluctantly, you nodded in agreement, plopping yourself on the couch as Javi turned on the TV, rewinding the VHS tape to the point where you had fallen asleep earlier before joining you, draping his arm around your shoulder as you tucked in your knees and scooted closer to him. You sat for a few minutes in silence, letting the sounds of the movie fill the background. As you turned your head to look up at Javi, you could tell that even though his eyes were pointed at the screen, there was no way he was really watching the movie. Reaching up your hand, you ran your fingers across the length of his strong jaw, his stubble scratching against your palm, forcing him to look back at you. Your eyes met his, the sweet, chocolate brown looking back at you, with a confusing mix of exhaustion, guilt, want and helplessness. You brought your face closer to his, your lips now only inches apart as your whispers danced against his mouth, desperate to find something to ease his pain.
“What do you need, Javi? Whatever you need, I’ll give it to you.”
His tongue swept against his bottom lip, taking one last shaky breath before his words left his body with his exhale.
“You. I need you.”
His hands found their way to the bare skin of your thighs, his fingertips barely brushing against your flesh as he traced his way up to your torso, toying with the hem of one of his shirts that always looked so much better on you than him. Pressing his palm against the soft curves of your stomach, he tugged at the waistband of your sleep shorts, causing you to shift your body so he could slide them down your legs. Reaching over towards his lap, you grasped at his boxers, feeling him already half hard under the fabric as you rubbed your hand against him. Javi held your hips, slowly guiding you to straddle him as you kicked your shorts off your feet, leaving them in a pile on the ground. Slowly, you began to grind deeper into his lap, the feeling of him now fully hard beneath you. Gently prompting you to raise your arms over your head, Javi lifted your shirt, leaving you bare as he dropped it next to your shorts.
“Is this okay?” Javi rasped, pressing languid kisses against your neck and collarbone as you ran your hands against the width of his broad shoulders.
“Of course, baby.” Your reply low and horse as you began to drag the fabric of his boxers lower and lower, finally letting his cock spring free as his waistband pushed past. You brought your palm to your mouth, licking a long, wet strip across it before wrapping it around his length, thumbing over the precum already leaking from his tip. Javi tilted his head against the back of the couch as you twisted your wrist, stroking his cock, letting out a hushed moan before sitting back up to watch you.
“You’re fucking perfect, Osita. I don’t deserve you.” He dug his fingertips into the soft flesh of your ass, his sweet, brown eyes locked on yours as you pressed against him, nibbling at his ear.
“You deserve everything, Javi. I could give you everything in the world and it still wouldn’t be enough.” Javi grasped at your face, cupping your cheeks as he pressed his lips against yours in a deep, intense kiss, his voice shaky and lustful as his mouth parted with yours before he spoke.
“I don’t need anything besides you, Osita. Eres mi todo. Estás todo lo que necesito. (You are my everything. You’re all I’ll ever need.) He shuttered, letting out a low groan as you continued to rub your hand along his length, Javi now reaching down to trace lazy circles around your clit before dipping his fingers inside your wet heat. His fullness made you whimper, wrapping tighter around his cock as you stroked him, now bucking your hips against his hand as his fingers curled, bumping against the spongy spot that made you lose control. “Does that feel good, sweet girl? Fuck, you’re so wet.
“Mhmmmmm.” You gasped, rapidly nodding your head as his digits pulsed inside you, your cunt already drenched, desperate to feel the fullness of his dick, despite the thickness of his fingers. Carefully, you lifted your hips, moving yourself closer to him as you ran your fingers through the soft ends of his sleepy curls. Sitting up on your knees, Javi removed his hand as he watched you hover over him, his palms roaming to your hips as you guided his tip through your folds, collecting your arousal before lining him up with your entrance. His jaw went slack as you lowered down on to him, taking your time as you savored the stretch of every sweet inch until you had bottomed out at his base.
“Fuckkk, baby.” He mewled, gently guiding his hands against your hips as you dragged yourself up along his length before headfully sinking back down, the tip of his cock bumping against your cervix with each movement. Javi nipped at your neck, trailing hot, wet kisses down your collarbone before stopping at your breasts, flicking this tongue along each of your pebbled nipples as you pushed deeper into his lap, whimpering at his touch. “My sweet girl, always taking me so well, like you were fucking made for me, baby. God, you’re so fucking gorgeous.” Javi pulled you in tighter, caging his chest against yours as his arms wrapped around the small of your back as he rested his face in the crook of your neck. “Fuck, I love you so much, Osita.” His words were desperate and needy against your bare skin, digging your fingers into his dark curls as you swirled your hips around his cock.
“I love you too, Javi. More than anything.” You moaned as felt Javi shift his weight, thrusting upwards as he buried himself deep inside you. His fullness had you digging your nails into the nape of his neck, your body melting into his with each push and pull against each other. You could feel the all too familiar tingle creeping up your legs and through the base of your spine as Javi’s hand found its way to circle around your clit, already throbbing as the curled hair around his base brushed against your sensitive nerves. The lewd noises of your moans and tangled bodies drowned out the sounds of the TV behind you, practically hearing how wet you were as Javi cock slipped in and out of your heat, his pace pounding as he punched into you. You could feel your walls beginning to tighten around him, arousal pooling in your belly, Javi knowing you were close as you whimpered into the crook of his neck. “Fuck baby, don’t stop- ahhhh- please don’t stop, I’m so close.”
“I know, baby, I know. Let go for me, Osita. Wanna feel you soak my lap before I fuck you full of me. Cum for me baby, it’s okay, I’ve got you.” Javi’s fingers rubbed faster along your clit as you rolled your hips, sinking yourself deeper onto his cock with each thrust, your vision going white as you could feel yourself come undone.
“Javi, Javi- fuck- Javi, Jav-ahhhhhh.” You could feel yourself gush around him, crying out his name as you reached your high, your legs shaking and fingers digging into his skin, pleasure flowing through your veins.
“That’s it, Hermosa. Fuck, baby, I’m gonna cum too, fuck myself so deep inside you. My perfect girl. Mierda- Quiero que seas mío para siempre, mi amor. Solo tú, por siempre y para siempre. (Shit- I want you to be mine forever, my love. Only you, forever and always). Fuck me, I- fuckkkk.” Javi hissed as he buried himself deep in your hilt, spilling every drop of his spend against your walls. You could feel the mixture of the both of you dripping down your thighs, soaking Javi’s lap as you slumped into his body, your heart racing as the damp curls of his hair pressed against your shoulder. You both sat there for a moment, letting your chests rise and fall together in sync as you came to. “Fuck me, Osita. I could stay like this forever, baby.”
“You and me both. Although, I feel like that would make things awfully inconvenient for the both of us.” Your soft, sleepy giggles making Javi smile as he ran his fingers though the twisted ends of your hair. Carefully, you lifted yourself up, hissing at the loss of Javi inside you.
“Thank you, Osita.” Javi whispered, tenderly circling his thumb along your jaw as you curled up next to him.
“For what?”
“Just- fuck, you’re so good to me. I don’t know what I’d do without you. So, I just- thank you. Thank you for being everything I need.” Planting a gentle kiss on your forehead, Javi pulled you tighter, holding you in his arms as you leaned against him.
“I’ll always be here for you, Javi. I promise.”
You hoped he knew. That he knew your words were true. That when the time came for him to open up to you, letting you into the painful past that loomed above him, that you wouldn’t run. You would be right by his side, just as you were right now.
“Well good morning, Sleeping Beauty.” Javi chuckled as you twisted in the passenger seat, stretching your arms over your head, scrunching your face, letting out a lengthy yawn.
“Fuck, how long was I asleep for? How much longer do we have left? Sorry, I wasn’t planning on sleeping that long, I just wanted to take a nap for a little while we drove.” You ran your hands over your face, looking out at the bright Texas sun shining over the neat suburban neighborhood you now found yourself driving through. Javi reached over across the center console, rubbing his hand along your thigh as he chuckled to himself.
“Baby, I knew from the moment you fell asleep you were gonna be out for the rest of the drive, it’s okay. I was just worried I was gonna have to wake you up in the Murphy’s driveway.” You grumbled as you looked over at Javi, giving him a playful swat against his arm, shaking your head, now emerging from your post nap fog.
“Well if we weren't up fucking at 2:30 in the morning, perhaps I wouldn’t be so tired, hmmmm?”
Javi rolled his eyes as you poked fun at how the both of you had found yourselves last night, trying to ease Javi’s sleeplessness. While your solution had worked enough to ease him back to bed, it had now left you wide awake, wondering what had been going through Javi’s head, torturing him enough to keep him up. It had also meant that the two of you had slept in much longer than you intended, leaving later than planned for Steve and Connie’s. The two of you had quickly packed your things and hit the road, stopping to grab lunch on the way before you found yourself dead asleep next to Javi for the last hour and a half of your journey to San Antonio. With only a few minutes now left in your drive, you peered out the window, admiring the houses that lined the quiet streets of the Murphy’s neighborhood.
“This is a cute subdivision.” You smiled over at Javi, admiring the houses, charming and inviting as they were freshly decorated from Halloween.
“Yeah, it is pretty nice.” He grinned back, wrapping his palm around your thigh, giving your leg a little squeeze. He took a deep breath, his voice now shifting in tone, becoming more shaky and nervous. “Would you uh- would you, um, wanna live in a neighborhood like this?”
“Maybe. I don’t know, the houses are all really close together. I spent so much of my life in the city, and even at my house growing up, everything always felt so cramped. After coming here, especially after seeing your ranch, I don’t know, I would love to be somewhere with more space. But that’s a big ask, so, maybe one day if it works out, I guess.” You reached over, rubbing your hand along Javi’s arm, your soft smile meeting his tender gaze as he smirked, nodding to himself.
“Yeah, one day.”
Taking a last turn down one of the neighborhood streets, the two of you pulled up to the quaint two story home belonging to the Murphy’s. Turning off the ignition, Javi paused for a moment, grinning to himself as he ran the hand resting on your leg up to your face, cupping your check as his eyes roamed the length of your body, taking every inch of you in as his sweet brown eyes consumed you. “I love you, Osita.”
“I love you too, Jav.” Both of your heads tilted, your lips gently pressing against one anothers as you traced your hand through Javi’s dark curls, pulling him closer into you. You could feel his smile against your mouth as his tongue barely swiped against your bottom lip, the two of you so lost in the moment, you hadn’t even seen Steve make his way out of the house to greet you, let alone the fact that he was now standing at the driver’s side door, hands on his hips as he watched your impromptu makeout session in Javi’s truck.
“You two lovebirds want help bringin’ your bags in, or do I need to give you a minute?” Steve chuckled to himself as you and Javi shot up, hearts racing and faces going white hearing his distinct drawl and rapid tapping at the driver’s side window. Taking a deep breath to compose himself, Javi placed one more soft kiss on your forehead before promptly turning around to flip off Steve and opening the driver’s side door. “You two are worse than a pair of horny teenagers, I swear.” You could hear Steve still snickering to himself as you exited out your side of the car, making your way over to find Javi and Steve in a tight hug, lovingly patting each other on the back.
“Fuck off, Murph.” Javi shook his head against Steve’s embrace, pulling away to grab your two bags from the backseat.
“Listen, I’m not the one makin’ out in my driveway.” Steve shrugged as you sheepishly emerged from your side of the truck, smiling at you as grimaced at him.
“He started it…” You glanced over at Javi, you and Steve now both giggling as he pulled you in for a hug.
“Of course he did, wouldn’t put anything past this old bastard. How ya doin’ sweetheart? Good to see the both of you, we’re really glad you guys could make it.
“She’s doing great after the hour and a half nap she took on the way here.” Javi interjected, slamming the truck door behind him, slinging both of your bags over his shoulder.
“Whatever, you meanie. In my defense, I was not planning to sleep that long, and I think Halloween exhaustion got the best of me.” You shot Javi a quick wink, trying to bite down on your lip before turning back to face Steve.
“Listen, I don’t blame ya. I’m fuckin’ exhausted after trick-or-treating with 3 kids, let alone tryin’ to keep ‘em wrangled at school all day. I love those girls, but I don’t think I could've gotten them in my parents car fast enough when they came to pick ‘em up this morning. Here, come on in, I won’t make you stand out in the driveway all day, unless you need to make out more.”
As you stepped into the Murphy home, you were greeted by an abundance of Halloween streamers and banners hanging in the living room and up the stairwell to the second floor, along with a few Barbie dolls and accessories scattered across the entryway, nearly stepping on one as you came through the door. You could smell the sweet scent of something baking in the kitchen as Connie came rushing through the hallway, arms outstretched to greet you and Javi. “Oh it’s so good to see you two, thank you so much for coming!” Connie squeezed you and Javi in a tight hug before she backed away, kicking one of the toys on the floor across the room. “Sorry about the Barbies, I told the girls to clean up before they left for their grandparents this morning but I think all 3 of them are still running on a sugar high from last night and that obviously didn’t happen.”
“Thank you so much for having us! Don’t worry about it at all, I totally understand! Javi was just telling me on the way over how much he was hoping the girls had Barbies he could play with anyways!” The 3 of you laughed as Javi rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest as you gave him a smirk and a little nudge.
“Fuck, I forgot how funny she was Jav.” Steve snickered to himself, picking up one of the Barbies and tossing it across the room into one of the toy baskets along the wall. “Seriously though, we are really glad you guys could make it. Your birthday party was fun as hell, old man. Glad to be close enough to actually see each other and do stuff like this again.”
Before Javi would respond, you all jumped, startled by the sound of the kitchen timer beeping rapidly from the other room. “Oh crap, sorry, I gotta grab the cupcakes out of the oven!” Connie grimaced apologetically, making her way back to the kitchen.
“Do you need any help?” You asked, excited to spend more time with Connie.
“Oh my gosh actually if you could help with frosting the cupcakes that would be amazing. I made these yesterday for Olivia and Abby’s class parties, and I had no idea it was gonna take so long and was worried I wasn’t going to have enough time for all of them before the party! Thank you!”
“Of course!” You replied, grinning at her before following her lead to the kitchen, giving a little wave as you disappeared around the hall, looking back at Steve and Javi. “Have fun, you two.”
Steve paused for a moment until the both of you were out of sight, waiting to forcefully slap his hand against Javi’s chest, making him groan from the unexpected pain.
“What the fuck was that for, you jackass?” Javi winced, glaring at Steve.
“Where the fuck’s the ring, man?! Steve hissed through gritted teeth, looking back at Javi in disappointment. “I thought you were gonna fuckin’ do it after you got back from Chicago and met her family?! I thought everything was all good with- oh shit, did something happen with the ho-”
“Shhhhhh! You fuckin’ idiot, please, talk louder, I don’t think the people at the end of the street could hear you.” Javi looked around the corner, clenching his jaw, praying that you hadn’t heard anything from the kitchen.
“I’m not that fuckin’ loud… Shit, what the fuck happened then?” Steve grumbled, looking over at Javi with concern.
“Can we maybe talk about proposal plans somewhere that’s not right by the woman I’m trying to propose to?” Running his thumb over his balled fists, Javi’s eyes darted back and forth, staying on the lookout for your return.
“Fine, fine, fine. I’ll show you where the guest room is and then you can tell me.” Steve motioned up the stairs, Javi trailing behind with both your bags draped around his shoulders
“Was I really that fuckin’ loud?”
“…Have you heard yourself talk?”
“So how’s everything been going at work? There definitely was a full moon sometime in the past week because things were crazy at the hospital, I’m sure they had to be equally as bad at an elementary school.” You and Connie giggled as you squeezed a dollop of orange frosting onto one of the cupcakes before taking one of the little bags to pipe on eyes and a mouth to make it look like a pumpkin.
“Oh my god, I think it must have been on Wednesday, I had a boy cut another girl’s hair with scissors and then had to call another parent because her daughter bit another kid at recess pretending to play werewolves. I felt really bad we didn’t come last night, I was exhausted after our Halloween party, I fell asleep on poor Javi at like, 8 o’clock.”
Although you found yourself laughing with Connie again, you couldn’t help but shake the uncomfortable feeling you had in your gut as you thought about after you had woken up in the middle of the night to find Javi wide awake and distressed. You carefully set down your spatula, taking a deep breath before glancing over at Connie, still frosting next to you. “Hey, uh, Connie? Can, um- Can I ask you something?” Connie immediately sensed the shift in your tone, putting down her cupcake.
“Of course, honey. What’s going on?”
“Did um, did- Did Steve ever- ever talk to you? About all the stuff that happened in Colombia? I mean like, I know you were there, but I don’t know. Sorry, I don’t know what I’m trying to ask, this is probably way too personal, I-” You could feel yourself shrinking, retracting in embarrassment at your overly intrusive question, unable to finish your thought before Connie cut you off, placing her hand on your shoulder.
“Oh, honey…” Her eyes were filled with sympathy as they looked back at yours, letting out a sigh before she responded. “Did something happen?” You began to nod your head no, even though you could feel the words yes burning in your throat. You took another shaky breath, trying to hold back the tears now welling in your eyes as you spoke.
“No I mean- well, yeah, I guess. Last night, I woke up and Javi wasn’t in bed. He was out in the living room and I could tell that something was bothering him. I don’t know- maybe it was nothing. I just- when my brothers came back from active duty, there were a lot of things that kind of just went unspoken. I knew it was hard for them to talk about. Charlie handled it okay, but my brother Patrick never wanted to talk to anyone about what happened, and it just- I don’t know Connie, I don’t think Javi would ever do anything stupid like he did, but- fuck- it scares me sometimes. I know Javi’s done things that he’s probably not proud of, and I get it’s part of the nature of what his job was. I don’t care. I really don’t. People do shitty things when they’re put in shitty situations. But he never talks about it. Ever. Does… Does he not trust me? I care about him so much, Con. More than anything. I get so worried about him.”
Your tears were now streaming down your cheeks, leaving your face wet as you wiped the back of your hand across your skin to try and do some form of damage control before Connie embraced you, pulling you in for a hug, tightly wrapping her arms around you. “Oh sweetheart. Of course he trusts you. When Steve came back, he was a mess. I don’t think it really all hit him until he was finally home. I guess you’re right, it was different because I was there, but even then, there were things that happened that I didn’t know about. After begging and begging him, I finally got him to go to see someone and it really helped, but even now, there’s times where it still creeps up on him. Honey, Javi loves you so much. I didn’t think I’d ever live to see the day he was in love as he is with you. If he’s anything like Steve, he just doesn't wanna hurt you.”
You sniffled, taking a step back to wipe your nose with your sleeve, your lip trembling as you tried to keep from crying harder than you already were. “But that’s what hurts, Connie. It hurts me to think he has to keep this from me, like I’m gonna think less of him for what he’s been through.”
“I know. Have you talked to him about it?” Connie’s voice was gentle and sweet, rubbing her hand along your arm as she listened to what you needed to get off your chest.
“No… I guess I should have. I never wanted to pry. I know it’s hard to talk about, I just- I wanna be there for him Connie. I don’t want him to have to do it all on his own.” You shifted your gaze to the ground, guilt washing over you. After Patrick, you couldn’t live with the idea of letting Javi try to suffer through his past alone. You loved him more than anything- and even the slightest thought of going through anything similar to what had happened to Patrick again with Javi was almost paralyzing.
“I think the best thing you can do is to go talk to him.” Looking back up, you saw Connie smiling at you, trying to convince you that everything would be okay, even if it felt like it wasn’t. “Why don’t you go find him? Party’s starting soon anyways, you can go change into your costumes and come down wherever you’re ready. I’ll be just fine with the cupcakes, tell Steve can put himself to work frosting.” The both of you grinned as you tried to wipe your tears, nodding slowly in agreement.
“Thanks, Connie.” You whispered into her shoulder as you pulled her in for a hug before heading up the stairs to find where Javi and Steve had gone. It didn’t take you long to find the pair, hearing their voices carry through the hallway from the slightly cracked door of the guest bedroom. You were about to knock and interrupt their conversation, stopping yourself with your fist barely touching the door as you tried to make out what they were talking about.
“The offer was in fucking cash, too. I was trying to make it easier so I could speed up the process, but it’s been taking them so goddamn long to close on everything so I can finally go sign the fucking paperwork.”
“That fuckin’ blows, Jav. I’m sorry. It’s not like she knows any better, though. It’ll still be a huge fuckin’ surprise, I’ll tell you that much.”
“I know. It’s been killing me to wait this long. I just want it to be perfect, Steve. She deserves everything. Honestly, I’m kinda glad it bought me some more time. I need to find a way to get her to see it before everything’s official in case she fucking hates it.”
“Javi. She’s not gonna hate it. Fuck it, tell her Connie and I are lookin’ for somethin’ and we wanted you two to go see it for us. I don’t know, maybe that’s too obvious. Speakin’ of which, I should probably go check to see if she needs anything before this party, I’m already in the fuckin’ dog house for forgettin’ to bring the girl’s trick-or-treatin’ bags to school, I don’t need to be in trouble for anything else.”
What the hell were they talking about? What was Javi signing? Why was it taking so long? What the hell did it have to do with you? Wait… holy fuck. No way… Was he-
Before you could finish your thought, you suddenly realized Steve was making his way towards the door. You quickly rapped your fist against the wood, trying to play off the fact you had been eavesdropping and make it look like you had just unassumingly made your way upstairs, not overhearing the conversation the two were just having.
Knock, knock.
“Hey, it’s me! Uh, Steve, Con wants to know if you can help her with the cupcakes really quick.” You pushed open the door, trying your best to smile at the suspicious pair as Steve shook his head, looking back at Javi.
“It’s always fuckin’ somethin’. I don’t even know what I did wrong this time, I swear.” Steve held up his hands defensively, sliding his way past you in the doorway before heading downstairs, leaving you standing there awkwardly, unsure how to feel after your conversation with Connie and the one you had just overheard.
“Hey, Osita. How’s everything goin’ down there? Sorry, we were just about to come down and- Hey, baby, you okay?” Javi stood up, concern spreading across his face from the strange scrunch in your brow as you stared at the floor.
“Ummmm…” You froze for a moment, unsure of what to do. On the one hand, your conversation with Connie had you ready to confront Javi, to finally work up the courage to ask him about the past life he had tried his best to keep from you. But as you glanced over at him, seeing his sweet brown eyes and stupidly handsome face, remembering the discussion you had just overheard through the doorway, the other hand meant you weren’t at risk of ruining your night that the two of you had been so looking forward to, and right now, the other hand was going to have to be the one you needed to play. “Yeah, yeah, I’m good, I just- I was gonna ask you something but forgot what I was gonna say. I’m sure I’ll remember it eventually.” You smiled at Javi, neither of you completely convinced by your response. “But um, Connie said that people are gonna start getting here soon, so we can change into our costumes if you want.” A smirk slowly stretched across your cheeks as you nodded over to the black duffle bags laying on the bed.
Javi’s grin matched yours quickly, grabbing your hips and pulling you closer against him as you giggled. “You sure we’re not gonna be the only ones dressed up?”
“Well considering it’s a Halloween party and I literally just talked to Connie about what she and Steve are wearing downstairs, I’m gonna give it a pretty confident yes. Worst case, it just looks like you’re wearing a white shirt and vest, Mr. Solo. You stuck up, half-witted, scruffy looking nerf herder.” You raised your eyebrows, playfully poking at his chest. Javi paused, shaking his head at your quote, firing one right back at you as he bit down on his lip.
“You just like me because I’m a scoundrel. There aren’t enough scoundrels in your life.”
“I happen to like nice men.”
“I am a nice man.”
Javi cupped your face, pulling you in for a long, heavy kiss before backing away to unpack your bags, shooting you a quick wink as you rolled your eyes. Jesus, he even found a way to make Star Wars sexy. Just when you thought you couldn’t be anymore in love, Javier Peña never failed to find a way to make you realize you’d never stop falling for him.
After putting in what felt like the 74th bobby pin into your hair after getting the last braid wrapped over your head, you gave yourself a once over in the mirror, pleasantly surprised by how well your costume had turned out. While Javi was disappointed you were adamant you were not going as Princess Leia from Return of the Jedi and showing up in front of a group of strangers at Steve and Connie’s party in her slave costume, you and Javi both agreed that Hoth Princess Leia was definitely the next best look. Staring at you with his puppy dog eyes, Javi had been adamant about waiting with you as you finished getting ready, leaning his hip against the bathroom counter, arms crossed over his chest as he watched you finish the last of your hair and makeup.
“Okay, I think that should stay. All those years of braiding my hair for under my hockey helmet are finally coming in handy for something.” You snickered, pushing the final clip into your hair to hold it into place, giving yourself a once over in the mirror. As you looked yourself down, Javi’s eyes wandered up and down your body just as fast, practically undressing you as fast as you had put your costume on.
“Goddamn, Osita… Fuck, you’re so hot.”
“Me? Jesus Christ, Javi. You put Harrison Ford to shame with how fucking good you look. I like Han Solo better with a mustache anyways.” You licked your tongue against your bottom lip, running your hands along the muscles of his arms, straining against the tight henley shirt he was wearing under his vest. You were no better than Javi, practically having to force yourself to not look in his general direction while you were getting ready to prevent yourself from pouncing on him. But given the lack of chatter downstairs, and the impressive speed at which the two of you had gotten ready, you really couldn’t help yourself. Slowly, you let your hands begin to slip down his arms and across his chest, palming at the denim of his black jeans as he let out a deep groan.
“Hermosa…” He hissed against your neck as you grasped at the bulge now growing under his pants, your other hand now making its way down to undo his belt, the clinking of the metal drowned out by Javi’s heavy panting. You began lowering your body, sliding Javi’s pants and boxers down his thighs as his cock sprang free, his tip already red and leaking with precum. You rested on your knees, face to face with his length as you wrapped your hand around him, slowly stroking him a few times.
“This okay, Captain Solo?” You batted your lashes at him, giving him a wink before letting your spit dribble onto his cock, taking his tip into your mouth and swirling your tongue around it. Curling your fingers around his base, you began to twist your wrist, hollowing out your cheeks as you took him deeper into your mouth.
“Oh, fuck me. Holy shit, Osita.” He moaned, tilting his head back, letting his jaw go slack as your head bobbed back and forth. He gently rested his hand along the side of your face, helping to guide you along his length as you took him deeper and deeper down your throat. “Jesus Christ, baby. Fuck, that feels so good. You look so hot, god fuckin’ dammit.” Javi’s words were labored and shaky as you started to increase your pace, wrapping your free hand around the back of his bare thigh, digging your fingertips into his leg. Feeling the pressure beginning to build in his stomach, Javi began rocking his hips, his jaw completely slack as he looked down at the sight of how well you took him in your mouth, saliva dribbling down your chin as sucked along his cock, hard and heavy on your tongue. “Fuck, Osita. I’m not gonna last much longer. Can I cum like this, baby? Fill up that- fuck- fill up that pretty little mouth of yours?””
You glanced up at him, nodding, your lips still wrapped around his dick, the motions of your head and wrist now becoming faster and sloppier as you watched Javi’s brow scrunch and jaw clench, a sign you knew all too well that he was moments away from coming undone.
“Such a good fucking girl, taking me so well. Fuck, baby- shit- se sientes tan bien, estoy tan cercaaahhhhhh-” (you feel so good, I’m so closeeeee-). The hot ropes of his spend coated the back of your throat, the salty, tangy mix filling your mouth as Javi whined, giving his hips one last push as kept your lips wrapped around him, making sure that you had milked him of every last drop before releasing. Letting your spit and his release fall from the corners of your lips, you wiped your mouth with the back of your hand, smirking up at Javi’s blissed out expression. “Jesus Christ, Osita. You’re too fucking good at that. Holy shit. Lemme take care of-“
You held up your hand to stop him as you stood up, your gesture cutting off the rest of his sentence as you helped to pull up his jeans and boxers still resting along his thighs. “I’m allowed to give my hot ass boyfriend blowjobs without anything in return. C’mon, we better get downstairs before Steve walks in on us again.” You pressed up on your tiptoes, planting a quick kiss on Javi’s lips as he reached down to buckle his belt before the two of you tried your best to fix yourself up in the mirror to avoid the inevitable shit Steve was about to give the both of you. Giving Javi a quick nod in the mirror before turning off the light and heading out the door, he gave your ass a playful smack, making you squeal in surprise, making you turn on your heels. Resting his hand on his hip, he beamed at you, biting down on his lip.
“Fuck, I love you.”
“I know.”
The Murphy’s living room had begun to pool with guests as you made your way down the stairs, looking for Steve and Connie amongst the crowd. You and Javi both grabbed a beer from the cooler at the bottom of the stairwell, quickly turning around as you heard Steve’s familiar twang approaching behind you.
“Well I’ll be damned. You got this motherfucker in a costume? He must really love you.” Steve chuckled, shaking Javi by the shoulders. “And Star Wars too?! You asshole, how many times did I try to tell you they were good fuckin’ movies?! You shoulda dressed him up like Jabba the Hut.” You and Steve cackled as Javi rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, and what the fuck are you supposed to be? A sad pirate?” Javi jabbed, poking fun at Steve’s poorly put together costume.
“Listen, Olivia and Abby both wanted to be the Little Mermaid, so we had two Ariel’s, Con was Ursula, Madison was the yellow fish and I didn’t wanna be that annoying ass crab, so pirate it was, asshole.” Steve retorted, punching at Javi’s arm, the two of them laughing at each other like little boys. “Alright, go enjoy yourselves lovebirds, I’ll see ya in a little bit. And Javi?”
“Yeah Murph?”
“You really gotta start checkin’ your pants, buddy.”
Javi’s cheeks turned red, his eyes darting down to his zipper, still all the way undone from your activities upstairs, the both of you grimacing at each other, sheepishly avoiding eye contact with Steve as he disappeared into the crowd.
It really wasn’t a surprise to Javi how many friends the Murphy’s had already managed to make in their time since moving to San Antonio. Their house was quickly crowded with all sorts of people- Steve and Connie’s co-workers, neighbors, parents of friends Olivia and Abby had made at school, regardless of where the party goers were from, everyone had collectively agreed to make adult Halloween just as fun as any kids. You and Javi were having a great time catching up with Steve and Connie, as well as meeting some of their other close friends, one of Connie’s neighbors being an elementary school teacher, giving you two plenty to commiserate about from the hellish week it had been. It didn’t take long for the party to move outside, Steve drunkenly deciding that he needed to make a bonfire, despite adamant argument that with the amount of alcohol Steve had in his system, he was going to spontaneously combust if he got close enough to a flame. Javi, sober enough to still help his friend make rational decisions, was glad that Steve was happy to let him build the bonfire.
“The force is strong with you, Han Solo.” You giggled, Javi wrapping his arm around your shoulder, pressing a soft kiss into your forehead as the two of you stared into the flickering orange glow of the fire pit.
“Not strong enough to extinguish Steve if he got close enough to it. Hey, I got shit all over my hands, I’m gonna go to the bathroom and wash ‘em off. You need anything while I’m inside, Princess?” You smiled as you nudged Javi at the nickname he had been adamant about using since you had put on your costume.
“I’m good, thank you. I’m gonna go wait over on the swingset so I don’t completely reek of bonfire later.” Javi nodded as he slid his hand down your back, giving your ass a quick squeeze before making his way through the crowd, heading towards the house. Surprised no one else had capitalized on the chance to sit down, you wandered over to the wooden playset at the corner of the Murphy’s backyard, taking a seat on one of the plastic swings, kicking your feet against the grass below.
“Hey, there she is! How goes it, Leia?” Taking a few long strides through the yard, Steve was now quickly making his way over to you, stumbling over his own feet as he somehow managed to sit himself down on the swing next to you. You tried your best not to laugh at Steve’s drunken state, but his current antics weren’t making it very easy on you.
“I could ask the same to you. You doin’ okay there, pirate?”
“Fuck sweetheart, I’m doin’ fuckin’ great. Where’s the asshole?”
“Inside, I’m sure he’ll be back out soon.” You snickered at Steve watching the beer dribble down his chin from the overly confident swig he had taken.
“Good, I don’t need ‘em right now. You were the one I was lookin’ for.” Steve pointed in your general direction, but clearly wasn’t aware enough to hit his target head on.
“Me?” You laughed, pointing back to yourself.
“Yes, you. You talk to him yet?”
“About?” You paused, wondering if Steve had any inkling of the conversation you were planning to have earlier, or if he was drunkenly deciding you and Javi needed to discuss something else.
“You know about what. I talked to Connie earlier. I figured I owed it to you to come talk to you about it, too.”
Your heart began to race, that uncomfortable feeling once again beginning to churn in your stomach as you thought about the things you and Connie had discussed earlier. “Steve, you don’t owe me anything, I-”
“No, I do. Hold on a second.” Steve turned away, letting out a hearty burp, pouding on his chest before facing back towards you. “Sorry, I’ve been holdin’ that in for like 10 minutes, I needed to let it out. Anyways… What was I sayin’? Oh shit, yeah, the grumpy bastard. Listen, sweetheart. I know it’s gonna fuckin’ suck, but you gotta be the one to bring it up and talk to him about it. If I know anything about that motherfucker, it’s that he will bottle things up for way too fuckin’ long until someone gets it out of him. He’s a good guy. He says he’s not, but he is. Saved my ass more times than I can count. That job made us do some fucked up shit neither of us are fuckin’ proud of. But that doesn’t mean he gets to keep it from you. I swear to God, that asshole is so fuckin’ in love with you, it makes me sick. You make him so happy. He just doesn’t wanna fuck up the best thing that’s ever happened to him.”
You weren’t sure if it was the right thing to do, but in that moment, all you could manage was to reach over to the swing next to you, pulling Steve in for a hug as you tried to keep your tears from staining his shirt. “Thanks, Steve.” You whispered, leaning back into your seat, using your sleeve to wipe the wetness from your cheeks.
“I know you love him too. You deserve to know. Don’t let him be a stubborn jackass to you, okay? I’m bein’ serious. I should be the one thankin’ you though, honey. In all the years I’ve known him, I never thought I’d see ‘em this happy. I promise I won’t get this drunk at your wedding.” Steve winked, straining to push himself up out of the swing, somehow managing to catch his balance as he stumbled into the grass.
“You do make a very inspirational drunk, Steve.” You laughed to yourself, looking up at him with a genuine smile. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Alright, enough sap, I’m gonna go get another fuckin’ beer, I’ll see ya around okay?”
“Okay, maybe a water would be good for you, too.”
“Water’s for pussies.”
“Water’s good for people who don’t want raging hangovers tomorrow.”
“Pirates are always drunk, so I’ll be fuckin’ fine.”
“Whatever you say, Steve.”
It didn’t take long for Javi to return, easily spotting his tall, broad body making his way through the crowd, beaming at you as he walked over to the swings. You tried your best to smile back at him with the uneasy pounding in your chest quickly building, feeling your heartbeat in your throat. “Hey, Hermosa. Sorry it took so long, I ended up stopping to get another drink on the-“
“Do- Javi, do you trust me?”
Your words were quiet and blunt as they rolled off your tongue, your eyes peeled on your feet kicking through the grass beneath you.
Javi’s brow immediately scrunched in confusion, completely off put by your question and demeanor. “Do I- Baby, what are you talking about? Of course I trust you? What’s going on?” Setting down his drink, he began making his way next to you in frantic, worried strides.
“Then why won’t you talk to me about it?” Your eyes darted from the ground up to his, his sweet brown eyes swirling with confusion at the firm tone of your voice and desperation growing across your face.
“Talk to you about what? Hermosa, what’s going on? Is everything ok-”
“Why won’t you talk to me about Colombia?”
Javi took a step back. He wasn’t sure if it was out of defense, or absolute shock from the words that had just fallen out of your mouth. He stared at you for a moment, his jaw locking as you could see how hard he swallowed, trying to bide his time as he calculated his response.
“Osita… It’s not that simple.”
“That’s not an answer.”
“I don’t understand why we’re talking about this. Baby, if this is because of last night, you don’t need to worry about me, can we please just drop it?” The two of you faced each other in an unspoken standoff, Javi’s hands now resting on his hips as you crossed your arms over your chest. You had tried so hard to be patient, but in the moment, it was like all of your frustration was beginning to boil over.
“That’s exactly why we’re talking about this, Javi. Because I fucking worry about you. All the time. I’ve tried so hard to be patient. I’ve never, ever tried to get you to talk about it because I know it’s fucking hard. But last night, you’re up at 2 A.M, wandering around the apartment, and I’m begging you to tell me what’s wrong and you won’t fucking do it. I’m not an idiot, Javi. I can’t live in this weird in between space in your life where you pretend your past doesn’t exist when I know it still fucking haunts you. Why won’t you just talk to me about it?”
Javi could feel his heart pounding in his chest, his palms sweating as they clenched in tight fists at his sides. He tried so desperately to find an answer, something, anything he could tell you to try and justify his choices. The choices he had kept from you. The choices he couldn’t forgive himself for. “Because, I- fuck- because, goddamnit, I just- I was a terrible fucking person, okay? The things I did, they were-”
“What? Fucked up? Painful? Shitty? Of course they fucking were, Javi. You were literally in Colombia chasing down Pablo Fucking Escobar. What did you think I thought you were doing down there? Filing away paperwork? You don’t think I know that you did things you regret? That you’ve hurt people? Made choices that hurt innocent people who didn’t deserve it? I know Javi, I fucking know. I watched my brothers come back from the same goddamn thing. I tried so hard to give them space, to let them come to terms with the fucked up things they did on their own, and you know what fucking happened? One of them’s fucking dead because of it. I can’t let it happen again. I don’t care about what you did. It doesn’t make you a bad person. But you can’t try and hide it from me and pretend like it doesn’t exist. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. But I can’t if you don’t trust me. Please trust me. Please. I love you so much, Javi. I can’t lose you.”
Javi stood in silence, as the both of you fought the tears streaming down your cheeks. He wasn’t sure if he had just been hit in the gut with a giant sucker punch, or if the weight of the world had just been lifted off his shoulders. He truly didn’t know how to feel. He wasn’t even sure if he had heard you correctly. Did you really just tell him that you knew about the fucked up, terrible things he had done and that you didn’t care? That you still fucking loved him? All you wanted was for him to trust that you wanted to be there for him? He could feel his hands trembling and lip quivering as he tried to find the words to speak.
“Osita… I- fuck, baby. Osita, I’m so sorry. I trust you with my fucking life. You- You don’t deserve to have to deal with with all the fucked up things I’ve done. I don’t wanna scare you away, baby. You’re the best thing that’s ever fucking happened to me and I was so terrified if you found out about the terrible person I used to be, you’d leave. It’s not fair to you, I can’t expect you to carry the weight of all the fucking things I’ve done, too. I’m so sorry.” Quietly, Javi sat down next to you on the empty swing, burying his hands in his face. Gently, you reached over, pulling his hands away, forcing him to look at you.
“Whatever you tell me isn’t gonna scare me away. I promise. The only thing that’s gonna scare me is when you try to pretend you’re okay when you’re not. Javi… Javi, I just- I just wanna be there for you. I don’t want you to have to do it alone. I’d do anything for you. I trust you more than anyone. You’re my best friend. I just- fuck- I just want you to trust that I’ll always be there for you to. I promise.”
And just like that, the last brick holding up the wall between you and Javier Peña collapsed. There was nothing left to run from. Nothing left to hide. After he returned home, he was a changed man. He had hated the person he had become. Maybe there was a part of him that didn’t want to be loved, because he didn’t believe that he deserved to be. But then, there was you.
You.
You had taken everything he had known and changed his life for the better. You had become his better half, the person he loved more than anyone in the world. You had proved he was worthy of more than just existing- you had proved to Javi that he was worth the love and happiness you had promised him from the moment you had come into his life and made it worth living for.
“You promise?”
“I promise. Always.”
The way Javi grabbed you and wrapped you in his arms, grasping at the back of your shirt as he pulled you in tighter, feeling the hot breath of his silent sobs against your shoulder told you everything you needed to know. You didn’t know much, but if there was one thing you did know, it was that you loved Javier Peña more than life itself. As quickly as it had felt like your life had fallen apart, he had come into it and picked up the broken pieces to put it back together. And on an October night in San Antonio, sitting on an old wooden swing set in the Murphy’s backyard, you hoped that Javi knew that you would always be there to pick up the shattered parts of his past, too.
You weren’t sure how many hours had passed as you sat hand in hand in the swings with Javi as you listened to anything and everything he had to say. Long after the backyard was empty, and the bonfire had faded to embers and ashes, and the only one left awake besides the two of you was Connie, trying to drag Steve back inside from the plastic lawn chair he had passed out on, you finally made your way up to bed for the best sleep the two of you had in a very, very long time. Your goodbyes to the Murphy’s had been short and sweet- Connie exhausted from the late night, and Steve barley coherent from how hungover he was, you were still both so thankful the two of you had made the journey out to see them, and the both of you, just as grateful for the sweet and supportive life long friends you knew the Murphy’s would become. Most of your drive back to Laredo was spent in a comfortable silence, the golden sunrise spilling through the windows of Javi’s truck as you cruised down the highway, Javi’s hand never leaving yours, your fingers intertwined together as his thumb gently rubbed against your soft skin and your head rested against his broad shoulder.
“How are you feeling about seeing your mom today?” You asked, lightly squeezing his arm as you smiled up at him, now exiting off the freeway quickly approaching the cemetery where you planned to meet Chucho to celebrate Día De Los Muertos, trying your best to comfort Javi as he prepared to see his mom’s gravesite for the first time since her funeral almost a decade ago. Javi let out a quiet sigh, his grip tightening just a little tighter around your hand as he looked over at you, a surprisingly calm look flooding his face.
“I’m actually doing okay. Better than I would have thought. I think I was always so worried that she wouldn’t be proud of me and the man I’d become after she was gone. I um- I finally think that she’d be proud of me now.” He glanced over at you, his smile soft and tender as he soaked in the reason for his pride sitting right beside him.
You noticed Chucho’s truck as you pulled up to park along the edge of the small cemetery, Chucho excitedly waving you down as you both hopped out of the car. Walking around to Javi, you were quick to grab his hand, giving him a reassuring grip as the two of you made your way through the gravestones along the thin cobblestone path towards Chucho, already arranging the items he had collected for Lucia’s ofrenda.
“Hola, niños.” Chucho grinned, wrapping his arms around the both of you. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
“Thanks for letting me be a part of today, Chucho. I know… Well, I just- I’m really honored to- just, thank you.” Chucho wasted no time pulling you into your own hug, his rough and worn hands holding you by the shoulders as he looked at you with misty eyes.
“Mija, I should be thanking you. If it wasn’t for you, I don’t know if we would all be here today. Lucia’s last wish to me was that I would promise to make sure Javier was happy. Now hija, I think my sweet Lucia can rest a little easier knowing someone else has already fulfilled my promise for me.” As the two of you spoke, you hadn’t noticed as Javi had quietly stepped over to his mother’s gravestone, crouching next to it, his fingers delicately tracing along the engraved letters of her name, his other hand holding one of the marigold flowers Chucho had brought with him. The two of you watched quietly as Javi sat next to his mom, gently placing the flower on the shiny stone as he spoke.
“Hola, mamá. Te extrañé. Siento haber tarado tanto.” (Hi mom. I missed you. I’m sorry I took so long). Javi’s voice trembled as he took a deep breath in, slowly exhaling as his hand rested on the stone, warm from the sun, shining brightly in the blue November sky. “Que estaba asustada de de verte porque estaba orgullosala de la persona en la que me había convertido. Que no quería decepcionarte. Tenía miedo mucho, mamá. Me sentí como si todo se derrumbase. solo quería olvidar. Pero entonces…” (I was scared to see you because I wasn’t proud of the person I’d become. I didn’t want to disappoint you. I was so scared, mom. I felt like I let everyone down. I just wanted to forget. But then…). Javi turned his head, seeing you and Chucho, arm in arm, a smile growing across his face as looked back at the two people in life he loved the most. He took an extra moment to stare at you and the soft grin spread between your cheeks, basking in the comfort and warmth of the woman who had forever changed his life for the better. “Pero entonces, mamá, La conocí. Que es perfecta. Nunca supe que podías amar tanto a alguien. Ella es lo mejor que me ha pasado. La habrías amado.ella es una maestra, tambien. A veces me pregunto qué ve en mí. No sé qué hice para merecerse. voy a pedirle que se case conmigo.Cuidaré bien de ella. Ella se merece todo lo que le pueda dar y más. Espero que estés orgulloso de mí, mamá. te echo mucho, Pero le juro a usted, al fin soy feliz. Te amo, mamá.” (But then, mom, I met her. She is perfect. I never knew you could love someone so much. She is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You would have loved her. She’s a teacher too. Sometimes, I wonder what she sees in me. I don’t know what I did to deserve her. I’m gonna ask her to marry me. I’m gonna take such good care of her. She deserves everything I can give her and more. I hope you’re proud of me, mamá. I miss you so much, but I promise you, I’m finally happy. I love you, mom.)
With a gentle nudge from Chucho, you softly stepped behind Javi, gently placing your hands on his shoulders before he rose up and you wrapped your arms around his waist, resting your head against his chest as he wiped away the tears welling behind his eyes. Staring down at Lucia’s gravestone, Javi ran his hand through your hair, carefully planting a kiss against your head and burying his nose in the soft waves of your hair.
“I wish I would have had the chance to have met you, Mrs. Peña. I would have had someone else to commensurate with over all of the crazy teaching stories I’m sure the both of us have. Maria, Estelle and Linda all miss you a lot too, but I’m sure they haven’t changed a bit. Thanks for raising such a good son. I don’t know what I would do without him. I know he says that he doesn’t know what he did to deserve me, but I really think it should be the other way around. I promise I’ll look out for him.” You tried your best to smile through your soft sobs, looking up at Javi, tears streaming down his wet cheeks. It wasn’t long before Chucho had snuck up behind you, patting each of you on the back before smiling down at Lucia, too.
“Estos dos están tan enamorados, Lucia. Tal vez más que tú y yo. Ella es una buena chica. Estoy muy contenta de que ella sea parte de nuestra familia. Finalmente tendremos a nuestros nietos, también.” (These two are so in love, Lucia. Maybe even more than you and I. She is a great girl. I am so happy she is a part of our family. We are finally going to get our grandchildren, too). Chucho winked, nudging Javi in the side, forcing him to laugh through his tears, shaking his head at his dad’s comment. “Now, no more tears, you two. This is a happy day. Your mamá is smiling down on you, and I can almost hear here scolding me to keep you from crying anymore. C’mon, let’s decorate and eat, I even brought pozole.”
The three of you spent the next hour decorating Lucia’s grave with bright orange and gold cempazuchitl (marigold flowers) and little Calaveras (sugar skulls) painted in bold colors and refined details, sharing and laughing about Javi’s favorite memories of his mother while snacking on the Pozole Chucho had brought to share. For the first time in a long time, Javi no longer felt guilt and grief when he thought about his mom- her memory filled him with love and joy. He wasn’t the same bitter, broken man he was when he had said his final goodbyes to his mother all those years ago. While he wished he could change the past, the reality of the present, and his future finally brought him peace, knowing he could be proud of the man he had become, thanks to you.
As Javi helped Chucho to clean up the extra flowers and decorations he had brought, you couldn’t help yourself from reaching at the wrinkled photo you had shoved in your pocket as you had packed up to leave from the Murphy’s this morning. You carefully took it out, holding it gently in your hands as you tried to uncrinkle the edges. “You ready, Hermosa?” Javi called out, now a few steps ahead of you, making his way back towards the truck. “Hermosa?” He asked again, thinking perhaps you hadn’t heard him the first time. When he was greeted by silence again, he looked back to see you staring at the crumpled photo in your hands.
“I um- I know that he isn’t buried here, and uh, if you don’t want me to, it’s okay- but um- is it, is it alright if I leave a couple flowers for Patrick?” You sniffed, a tear dropping down on the photo of the two of you, Patrick holding you in a headlock as you laughed with a wide, toothy grin, drowning in one of his old Blackhawks jerseys that you were so excited to wear because it belonged to him.
“Of course, Osita. Of course it is.” Javi smiled at you softly, turning back around with the tub of leftover decorations, making his way towards you. Quietly, you walked back over to Lucia’s gravestone, carefully setting down the picture of you and Patrick next to it, putting a few marigolds over top of it so it stayed pinned in place from the warm breeze.
“I miss you, asshole. You deserved so much better. I hope you don’t still think that I hate you. I mean, I do, but you know what I mean. Honestly, you were lucky you didn’t have to live through the Blackhawks losing in the playoffs this year, that fucking sucked. Mom and Dad and Charlie and David all miss you too. I finally went back home to see them. It still wasn’t the same without you there, but I know you don’t hurt anymore. I hope that you don’t hurt anymore. I love you, Patrick. Crack open a cold one up there for me, okay?” Trying your best to not to uncontrollably sob, you sniffled, wiping the tears running down your face as you leaned your head against Javi’s chest. He ran his hand along your back as he held you tighter, letting you take a moment to get everything out before you took a deep breath, nodding your head as if to signify to Javi and yourself that you were okay.
“You okay, Osita? We can take all the time you need, baby.” Javi whispered, pressing a gentle kiss into your shoulder.
“No, I’m okay. I just- I wanted to do something for him, too. Thanks, Javi. I love you.”
“I know.”
After several more long hugs goodbye with Chucho, you and Javi began your journey back home, marveling at the beautiful sunset, painting the sky with bright pinks and oranges and the warmth and comfort of Lucia and Patrick’s presence. You were so lost in thought staring out at the fading sky, you hadn’t even noticed that Javi had detoured from your usual route home until he had said something to you. “You okay if we make a quick pit stop on the way home, Osita?” You nodded, smiling at the golden glow covering his face. It wasn’t long until you were veering off the main road, Javi turning to make his way down a tree lined gravel pathway with a “For Sale” sign posted in front of it.
“For sale?” You questioned, looking over at Javi before peering out your window to watch the trees lining the path pass by you as the gravel crunched under the truck’s tires.
“Yeah, uh- I was talking with Steve at the party yesterday and he- uh, one of his buddies said he was looking to get out of the city- wanted a plot of land to build on. Said he had heard good things about Laredo but didn’t have time to go check things out for himself, so I told him I would go take a look around and let Steve know what I thought.” Javi replied, trying his best to sound nonchalant as you shrugged before looking back out the window. As you reached the end of the path, the trees opened to reveal a beautiful, lush green field, the sun setting perfectly along the rolling hills of the horizon in front of you. Turning off the ignition, Javi gestured for the both of you to get out of the truck so you could go take a look around.
“Jav… This is beautiful.” You marveld, grinning as you took in the beauty of the open space drenched in golden sunset.
“You like it?” Javi grinned, laughing as you spun around, the gentle breeze blowing your hair in and out of your face.
“Oh my God, yeah. Tell Steve’s friend to get on this place ASAP before I scrounge up every penny I have and sell one of my kidneys on the black market to buy it from him. There doesn’t even need to be a house, I’ll just lay in the empty field, perfectly content.” You giggled, letting out a happy sigh as you grabbed Javi’s hand, leaning your head against his arm as you admired the sun slipping away below the horizon.
“I’ll take that as a yes then. He said he’s wanting to build a house here, do you think- do you think that he would think it’s got enough space? It’s not too far from everything? I know it’s a little farther from downtown and a longer drive to work- if uh, if he works by where we do, you don’t think that’d be a problem? For him?” Javi squeezed back, trying his best not to stumble over his words.
“Are you kidding me? It’s literally perfect out here, Javi. Could you imagine getting to see this every night? He better put some big windows on this house so he can get all of the sunlight, oh my god, it would be so pretty. It’s not even that far from everything, and the view makes the extra drive time worth every minute. I know it’s probably a far way off, and we haven’t really talked about it, but I would love to live at a place like this someday.”
Javi smiled to himself, looking down at you as you rested against him, soaking in every ounce of you as he shifted his arm to wrap around your waist, gently rubbing his thumb along the soft hem of your shirt before letting out a content sigh.
“Yeah. Me too.”
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mellow, what about a fem dom reader who has a obsessive and delusional male sub stalker, and someday he break into her house to kidnap her, but our fem reader who knows fight skills pins him down in her dark basement and uses his body as her personal fleshlight as punishment?
I just love this trope so much. everything sub yan wants is to worship our fem reader and satisfy her desires, but ends up trapped and forced to watch his beloved giving herself pleasure while he's able to do nothing but sob and beg to help her (I even wrote a short piece similar to that, but I'd love to see what is in your mind)
note; this shit is so down bad, i love it. also reader is a certified prick in this one so please know your boundaries :)
warnings; yan male, sub yan, dom reader, fem reader, non-con to con, asshole reader, sadistic reader, objectification,
His head felt like it was stuffed with cotton as he tried to move his body. His limbs were heavy as if they were being weighed down. A harsh breath left him, his senses screaming at him. What had happened, what did he remember and better yet... where was he?
He was... stalking this girl, he had followed her to her house and when he had broken in through the door... that's where his memory ended. After that, it was all black. He could still smell her though, her perfume was in the air, was she nearby? He tried to move himself again but this time he heard something. The drag of chains on concrete... and if he focused hard enough the sound was coming from his legs.
Frightened, his breathing picked up as he willed his eyes to open, but they were sealed. Useless... he couldn't do anything, he couldn't do anything!
"Shut up won't you." A voice penetrated the air and he froze. That voice, it was her... she was here! He opened his mouth to ask her what was going on, if she was okay but her hand slid over the opening. Shocked he bit back his exclaims and froze, the sound of her shoes on the concrete seemed to surround him.
"I know what you're doing, think you can get the jump on me huh?" He shivered, there was something about her that he hadn't realised. She seemed to exude danger, power and that made him... aroused. Hands trailed down his chest, which in his panic he hadn't realised was bare. Nails bit into his skin as something heavy settled over his torso.
A strangled moan left his mouth, was she straddling him? Why wasn't she letting him see?
"Boys like you are depraved, boys like you need to be punished." Her voice seemed to envelop him completely, his senses blurred the lines between real and fake as her hands clamped around his wrists. His fingers twitched as her nails dug into his skin, bruises would litter him afterwards... a mark that she had been there.
"You wanted me right?" She hummed, her chest sliding over his own, the fabric of her bra pulling over his sensitive skin. He could feel the heat of her breath near his neck.
"You've got me." She whispered into his ear, her teeth gently nibbling on the cartilage as his mouth dropped open. It felt as if his chest was going to explode, his heart was pumping faster and faster as he sunk into the feeling. The warmth of her body atop him, the bite of the concrete below him... the anticipation of what would happen next.
His arms involuntarily jerked, he wanted to hold her, see her. He wanted to watch as she came undone on him. He wanted to see how she claimed him. His breathing stuttered as her mouth trailed over to his own, pressing a hot kiss to his lips. The sounds of his whines were muffled as she took without even thinking about him, about how hard his cock was waiting for her.
"Stay still won't you, whore." His cock jerked at the pet name and the feeling of precum dribbled from his head as she laughed. Soft yet mocking coos left her as her body slid down. She was... naked from the waist down, he could feel her wetness on his stomach.
"To come into my house like you did, you must think you own the place." She drawled out despite the want to say that he didn't feel like that at all. He just wanted to be near her, he wanted to have her.
'You've got me'
"You should know your place." She hissed as she dragged her cunt over the rolls of his stomach, using the groves of his very skin as a toy. A sinful moan left his mouth as he felt her warmth spread over his skin, she was claiming him as her own in the most primal way and he loved it. He wanted more, more and more. His wrists clasped in her hands writhed as he fought the urge to plant his hands on her hips. To feel her movement as she pleased herself.
"Fuck..." He moaned as his head slumped back against the concrete, stomach tensing to give her something to work with. He felt high but... but he wanted to touch her. To feel her sinful skin in his hands. He couldn't though, she was depriving him of the one thing he desperately craved.
"Let me touch you, please, fuck please!" He cried out, his hips shaking as he tried his best to not disturb her. Salacious sounds left her mouth as her free hand came up to cup his cheek.
"No, suffer for my pleasure won't you." Her laugh seemed to reverberate around him as his mind hazed, every moment that passed he felt himself slip deeper and deeper into the abyss.
She dragged her hips across his torso, her hands digging into his skin as she lost herself in the sensation.
"This is all you're good for, isn't it? Stupid boy coming into my house." She scolded as her breathing seemed to grow heavier and heavier. He felt his cock twitch, it was aching and yet she didn't even need to touch it for him to want to blow his load.
Soon the pressure became too much and with a strangled moan he came, shooting his cum over the small of her back.
"There we go~" She cooed as her voice rose in her own throes. Soon after he could feel her slowing down, painting his chest with her orgasm. He let out a shaky breath as the wetness of his blindfold seemed to register in his mind.
"Oh? Do you think it's over? You're wrong, you're all mine now." A drunken grin rose to his mouth as he let himself succumb to whatever desires she had in mind.
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Him.
Warning: Abuse, Angst/comfort, crying, blood.
Pairing: Hyunjin x reader
Summary: Hyunjin saves you from an abuse relationship.
Hey😆 if you don’t like graphic things please don’t read. Thank you! Not the best one shot but yeah hope you enjoy it :))
-🩷
**
"Alex please! I'm sorry!" I yelp as I scrumble on the floor trying to get away from my now angry boyfriend. My hands trembled and my body was now vigorously shaking on the ground.
This had been going on for 30 minutes and I was exhausted and dehydrated. My hands were slippery from the blood that laid on them. All my senses were gone at this point but he kept going and going.
"You'll be actually sorry when I'm done with you," his fist connecting with my chin as I scream in pain from the constant beating of his hands against my limbs. His steps were loud and his breathing was even louder. His face occasionally getting really close to mine.
"Please forgive me! I didn't mean it! Alex please!" I get on all my fours and take a few crawls away from his standing figure but his hands wrapped around around my ankle and yanked me back to his body.
He had a smirk on his face. He enjoyed this. I knew he did but the constant manipulation and lying words tricked my mind into thinking that maybe he was just stressed or tired or maybe I did something to trigger him whenever this would happen.
This time was done I know I had to get away somehow. I knew that if I didn’t leave him I would end up dead or I could put anyone at risk with him around.
I’m ripped away from my thoughts and prayers when his voice booms into my eardrums. A ringing sound now playing really loudly.
"You think you can be a little slut huh?! You think you can get away with this shit?! You're fucking pathetic!"
My eyes are glued to his body. His arms were both grasping and digging into my flesh. Small whimpers are leaving my mouth. I couldn’t see anything due to the tears that fogged my site but I knew he was so proud of himself.
He knew he could control me. He thought I wouldn’t leave him but this time I was thinking about it. Thinking about getting here alive.
I pray that it’s all over when he just glared at me and it is when he spits on me and walks away. His saliva is hot against my face. My body laying on the ground as I tried to get energy to get up. I slowly look up to see if he was still In the room but thankfully he was gone.
The slamming front door confirms it.
The world seemed to be moving in slow motion. The plate that was once neatly stacked with food was now on the floor and shattered.
Pillows were everywhere and the painting Hyunjin had made me was now ripped on the floor.
Heavier sobs leave my mouth as I slowly get up but I’m unable to. My body wouldn’t allow it. My shaking arms couldn’t support the weight. My breathing was getting worse but the sound is covered with my phone was ringing non stop.
Hyunjin's name popping up time and time again.
The warm sension of blood oozed from my nose. The throbbing pain of my nose and now black eye lingered. My body ached.
This was a normal thing tho. Alex didn't have the best temper and I knew that. It was my fault.
I knew he didn't like his food served at this hour but yet I thought that if I somehow convinced him to eat now I could go out later to hangout with the guys. He didn’t like them at all but he always found himself around us trying to make a point about who could come near me and who couldn’t.
I slowly help myself up by leaning on the couch.
My arms were bruised and the breaths I would try to take hurt really bad. Tears continued to roll down my cheeks. I limp towards the messy area trying to clean it before he came back. Before he would have another reason to snap.
The apartment was quiet. Khami was locked in his cage. The lights were dim and the kettle was boiling.
It was the knock on the door that got me out of my trance. My neck snapping towards it.
Who could be out there? Everyone knew not to come announced. The more I thought about it the more scared I got. Was it the neighbor? Did someone call the cops?
I try to avoid the door but the knocks get more frantic and loud. Hyunjin's voice now coming through.
"Y/n?! Y/n it's me! Please open the door. Are you hurt?! I can see your shoes out here! I know you’re in there!”
**
I was in the kitchen when Alex had come into the room. He was wearing his work suit and a smile played on his lips. He placed a kiss on my forehead and sets his briefcase on the table.
"Hey love, how was your day?" He asks. I look over at him and give him a tiny smile.
"It was good and yours?" I automatically ask him. My hands were stirring the cooking pot and the kettle of warming water sat besides the sauce pan.
"Yeah just tired,” he tans and furrows his eyebrows while looking at his watch “what are you doing?"
I run my hands nervously and turn towards him.
"Oh I'm just making you a plate of food before I go,"
"Go where?" His eyes furrow and I gulp, "remember I told you that I was going out with the guys? You let me go,”
"Go where? I don't remember this," his eyes squint "why would you go out with the boys?"
"Baby remember when I asked you?" I frown and look up at him. My hands play with the strings from the apron.
"You’re not going-" his voice is firm and now he is towering over me.
"But babe-"
"I said you’re not going and it's final," he snaps before turning around and leaving the room.
I let out a sigh thinking that maybe he was just in a bad mood but nevertheless a no was a no.
I put everything down and pull out to phone Chan who wasn't picking up so the next best option was Hyunjin.
"Hyunjin?" I say softly,
"Hey! How are you?" He beams through the phone. His voice was soft yet excited. The thought of no seeing them hurt my heart. I had been avoiding them due to the clear visual bruises that lay on my body from the fight I had gotten in either Alex a few days ago.
They were all so attentive when I was around them so I knew it wasn’t a good idea to be around when I was covered in bruises. Too many questions.
I begin to explain, "Oh I just come today, I'm sorry-"
"What? This is the 3rd time you've cancelled this week," his voice is layered with confusion, “are you trying to avoid me because of the kiss?”
My heart stops beating for a second and butterflied start to invade my stomach. It was definitely not because of that. I start to blush, I feel it.
"No Hyun it’s because Alex-"
"Who the fuck are you talking to?" A voice booms causing me to jump. I turn to see Alex stood by the door. His frame covering everything.
"It's no one Alex it's just Hyunjin,” I try to explain,
"Hello? Y/n? Is that Alex?" I hear Hyunjin's voice from the other side of the phone before glass shatters causing me to drop the phone.
"What the fuck is your probekm you bitch?!" He yells and charges at me.
"Alex no! I was just-"
I feel a hot sting on my cheek and my body being pulled by my hair to the living room.
I let out a scream causing him to let go and put his palm against my mouth
“Shhh don’t say a word, why the fuck are you telling Hyunjin about our business? Huh?! Is he part of our relationship?!” My eyes go wide and I frantically shake my head no. I can fear the tears starting to form in my eyes.
He lets go of my mouth and I take on a deep breathe trying to regulate my breathing. Trying to get away but my body is thrown to the floor.
“Alex please! Please I won’t do it again! I’m sorry,” a squeal leaves my mouth as I grab my rib cage that was now on fire because of the impact.
His eyes were dark and his fists were clenched and red from the previous fights we had gotten into. He was wearing his normal sweatpants, Shirt and his hair was a mess.
“Do you think you can play me?!” His voice booms through the room.
“No no no , I love you Alex-“
“Then act like it!” He is calm for a second before charging at me again causing me to scream in fear, “You’re the fucking problem. You little pathetic nobody!” His hand wraps around my neck trying to grab me off the floor.
My hands automatically try to remove his finger but his grip is too tight causing me to lack air. Not to breathe.
“Seems you don’t listen? Today I’m going to discipline you again.”
**
“H-Hyunjin go away please!” I whisper through the door.
“No Y/n! open the door right now or I’m calling the cops,” he threatens. My body goes cold, what could I possibly do?
“No no no! Please don’t!” Panic feels me before my shaky hands slowly open the door and a peep through the little crack.
“What is it hyun?” I whisper. I examine him. His wearing a flannel and some jeans. His airforces on and his jyp budge attached to his shirt meaning he had come from the studio.
“I heard everything Y/n open then door please?” His eyes are soft, warm and glistening.
“No-no you can’t Alex-“ by the time I try to finish the sentence he had managed to push himself through, frantically looking around the room.
“Is that son of a bitch gone?” He looks over at me when his done looking around the room.
“Yes yes- Hyunjin you have to go- he might be back-“ he takes a step back and looks at me in horror.
“Your face-“ he gasps then proceeds to step closer to me.
Sobs leave my mouth again. I try to hide it with my sleeves, “No don’t look at me-“
“I’m killing this motherfucker.” His body is tensed up and his jaw clenches.
His hands reach out to examine me. My face but I wince and try to step back.
“I’m so sorry I couldn’t be here on time my love, this is my fault, I knew he wasn’t okay! Fuck. Are you okay? What hurts? Let me see please princess? Let me take care of you-“ he pulls me on his body but I try to resist. This doesn’t let him let go though.
“Hyunjin-“
“It’s okay, it’s okay” is all he says and that makes me fall against his body. It was overwhelming. I was tired. I was crying. I was a mess. I was in pain. Really bad pain. My chest hurt. He carries me to the couch before examining the bruises even more. His eyes squinting. The room is silent only a few barks from Khami.
His hair was in a ponytail and his nails were painted in black. The little things I was noticing as I stared at him trying to make out what his face was saying or what his brain was thinking.
He gets up and gets the first aid kit and some cleaning supplies before sitting back down.
“I’m going to touch you okay? And it might hurt but I’m just cleaning you up okay?” I just nod trying not to fight or say anything.
“We’re leaving, you’re going to stay with me until we can find you an apartment and you’re leaving this bastard.”
“But he’ll find me Hyunjin,” I cry in a panic.
“Hey hey hey, even if he does, which he won’t. I’ll whoop his ass and give him a big beating. Nothing will happen, plus his going up against 8 boys I think we can take him,”
“What about-“ I wince when he puts a bandage on my arm. My concentration now turning to the throbbing wrist.
“No I’m not taking no for an answer. You’re coming with me, stay here.” He gets up and I watch him closely. He enters Alex’s room and disappears. Knowing I couldn’t argue with him I knew I had to get Khami because that witch would try and hurt him. I limp over to Khami’s cage and get him out. He starts licking my face and whimpering. Knowing he had been watching everything in the apartment from moments before.
“I got your bags love,” Hyunjin says coming back. He gives Khami a small smile before he wraps his hand around my waist pulling me onto him.
“I love you,” his lips touch my softly. His fingers wipe the tears that had fallen from before. His body is warm and he smelt like flowers and blueberries…maybe strawberries.
“I’m going to protect you. I have to protect you.”
Before I can say anything he grabs my stuff and guides me to the car outside closing the door.
This was a new beginning to the end.
#skz imagines#skz comfort#skz angst#skz x reader#skz drabbles#skz fluff#skz stay#skz x y/n#skz x you#stray kids drabbles#hwang hyujin imagines#hwang hyunjin x reader#hyunjin x reader#straykids x reader#stray kids angst#stray kids fanfic#stray kids imagines#stray kids fluff#stray kids scenarios#stray kids x y/n
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A Door to the Future | Mammon x Reader
.7K words | GN! Reader | CW: children
“Shit, which door did Barbatos say it was again…” Mammon walked down a corridor of doors in Barbatos’s room. He wasn’t even sure if he’d gone down the right hallway.
“Red door, red door…I think,” he mumbled as he strolled. His eyes lit up when he saw the door near the end of the hallway. “Bingo!”
He laughed to himself and sprinted to the door. He opened it up exited and waltzed right in when something collided with his leg.
“Hey!” He snapped instinctively before seeing the object was in fact a small boy.
“Oh shit, you alright kid…” Mammon asked and awkwardly crouched down to check on the boy. The boy looked up at him with bright blue eyes and Mammon raised one brow curiously.
“Hey, you kinda look like—“
“Papa!” The boy exclaimed and clung to Mammon’s leg. “I thought I didn’t get to say goodbye.” He sobbed and Mammon froze awkwardly.
“Yeah…um…here I…am?” Mammon was beyond confused and his instincts were telling him this definitely wasn’t the right door.
“Mammon, is that you?” Mammon froze when he heard your voice. Suddenly you appeared before him, older and more graceful than before but just as beautiful.
Mammon’s cheeks flushed when he saw you. “Oh, uh—“
You hugged him excitedly. “Good, I was worried Matty missed you.” You sighed in relief and Mammon looked around the room anxiously.
What was happening? Where did this door lead?
“Why don’t you have some coffee before you go, you can’t run off to work like that without breakfast,” you told him and he nodded wordlessly.
Wasn’t this the house of Lamentation? Something felt different about it. Mammon saw toys scattered across the floor and when he waltzed into the dining room behind you he saw six chairs instead of eight.
This made Mammon uneasy. Was everyone okay?
“Six…” you heard Mammon mumble worriedly.
“Did you forget? Leviathan and Asmodeus are visiting later so I brought the extra chairs out.”
Mammon noticeably relaxed when he felt Matty cling to his leg again. Mammon wasn’t sure what to do and kept walking, dragging the other leg behind him as the boy laughed excitedly.
“Daddy?” Mammon gasped and looked behind him where he saw a young girl, the spitting image of himself.
She wore a backpack and her hair was in a sloppy ponytail. She looked confused and possibly annoyed?
“Why aren’t you at work? Are ya skipping again?” She glared teasingly.
You laughed and Mammon shook his head, “I ain’t skippin’!”
“Ava, don’t tease your father so much,” you scolded and Mammon audibly gulped.
“F-fath—“
He was cut off when he heard Barbatos’s voice in his head.
“Mammon, return. Now.”
Mammon gently pried the boy from his leg and gave you an anxious look.
“Hey, listen…Umm. I gotta—“
You smiled and nodded. “I know.” Of course, you knew. Mammon wouldn’t stop talking about the future he saw with you when he returned to his own timeline. You’d wondered when you’d finally meet the Mammon of the past again. Alas, you couldn’t get him to stay any longer than he originally had.
You and Mammon shared a knowing smile. “See ya soon…yeah?” Mammon asked and you nodded. You waved and beckoned Ava and Matty to your side.
“Kids, say goodbye to dad.”
Ava grinned and Matty waved, “Bye papa!” They chimed in unison and Mammon, looking back until the last second shuffled out the door he came through.
Barbatos dragged him into the hallway and glared down at him.
“Wh…what was that…” Mammon gasped, holding his chest.
Barbatos rolled his eyes. “That was what you weren’t meant to see.”
“Wh-huh…d-does that really happen!? Are ___ and I gonna? Y-you know!”
Barbatos rolled his eyes again and sighed. “It’s a possibility.”
Mammon turned red and his heartbeat faster. “Hell no! It’s not a possibility, that’s happening! Definitely!”
“If you say so,” Barbatos clucked and started walking away towards the correct door.
“Hey don’t leave me!” Mammon yelled and ran after him, mind racing.
Could he make it happen? Of course, he could right!? Anything to see those little kids again, and you…every day for the rest of his life.
“Ava and Matty, huh…” Mammon grinned to himself. He couldn’t wait to tell you all about it. “___ is definitely gonna be with me, not even Lucifer can change that.”
#obey me drabble#obey me second generation#obey me mammon#obey me mammom x reader#Ava is short for Avarice she is 13#Matty is 5#mammon owns a large casino chain and sometimes skips work to hang out with his family#obey me fic#obey me ficlet
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I'm suddenly imagining Steve’s parents as James Marsters and Charisma Carpenter.
"Have you ever played the Floor is Lava game?" Eddie asked Steve.
They were lounging at Steve's house, watching TV when Eddie suggested the game. They had flipped through the channels, but they found nothing they wanted to watch at the moment.
"No," Steve scoffed. "What's that?"
"Oh, right. You're an only child with boring parents. My mom used to play it with me when I was little. The concept of the game is that you have to avoid touching the floor because it's made of Lava," Eddie grinned. "You wanna play?"
"Sure."
An hour later, pillows were rearranged on the floor as well as the furniture. They had been hopping around on them for a while now, Eddie telling an outlandish tale of Lava Pirates. Steve had made it safely to the couch, but Eddie was still on the coffee table. The pillows in between them had been knocked aside, and now Eddie had to make it from the coffee table to the couch. There was a huge gap.
"I don't think I'm going to make it. Tell everyone that I love them," Eddie said dramatically. "Go on without me!"
"Oh, for fu - just jump, Eddie!" Steve exclaimed.
Eddie jumped, his feet barely making it to the edge of the couch, and he almost stumbled into the Lava if it hadn't been for Steve grabbing the front of his shirt. Steve pulled him onto the couch and into his arms, wrapping one arm around his waist to stable him.
"My hero!" Eddie said, batting his eyelashes.
Eddie pressed his hands to Steve’s chest, breathing heavily as he stared into his eyes. They were both breathing heavily. Steve pulled him closer until their bodies were pressed together. He took the opportunity to kiss Eddie, pressing his lips gently against his. He smiled when he felt Eddie kiss him back. It was brief, though, because Eddie was suddenly pulling back.
"I'm sorry," Eddie said quickly. "I'm not like that. I mean, it's okay if you are, but I'm not - I'm not like that."
"Okay," Steve said, his voice filled with emotion, and he tried not to look at Eddie, his face red from embarrassment.
Eddie stood there awkwardly, not knowing what to do as he watched his friend's eyes fill up with tears. He jumped down from the couch and started putting on his shoes.
"I'm going to go now," Eddie said, but Steve didn't say anything. "Uh, see you later."
Eddie started walking towards the door, and as he left, the last thing he heard was the sound of a sob coming from Steve. He hated that sound. Eddie's chest fluttered with this heavy weight, and he found it hard to breathe. He wasn't like that, was he? Shit, he needed to call Ronnie.
A couple of days later. . .
Steve thought he had been hiding his emotions all day at work, but apparently, he was wrong.
"What the hell's wrong with you?" Robin asked as soon as they sat down for their break.
"What are you talking about?" Steve asked with a sigh.
"I mean. You've been in a mood all day. You were even rude to the customers," Robin said. "So, rude that they gave you looks, they made complaints to me. You even snapped at me earlier."
"I did?" Steve asked in surprise.
"What's going on?" Robin asked softly.
"I, uh, kissed Eddie," Steve revealed, fiddling with his lunch.
"Okay, so it didn't go well. What happened?" She asked.
He told her all about the game they played and how Steve had saved him. He trailed off near the end.
"We were wrong about him, Robin," he said.
"What?"
"He's not like us," Steve said, shrugging. "He told me. I just need some time to move on, get over him, and then we can go back to being friends. I just want him to be a part of my life, and I'll take whatever he can give me."
"No! No! He is like us! There's no way my radar is off about this," Robin frowned.
"It's okay, Robin. I'll be okay," Steve said.
"Are you sure he didn't kiss you back?" Robin asked.
"I didn't say that he didn't," he said.
"So, he did kiss you?" She asked.
"Yeah, but I'm sure it was like a reflex," Steve said.
"Okay. What did he say exactly after that?" Robin asked.
"He said that he wasn't like that, but it was okay if I was, but he just wasn't like that," Steve replied.
"Wait, so he said it twice?" Robin asked.
"Yeah, why?"
Robin frowned thoughtfully as she tapped her chin. She placed her hands on the table in front of him.
"Okay, I don't want to give you false hope, but maybe it was us who's the problem. We kind of assumed that Eddie's the kind of guy who always knew about himself like we did," Robin said. "But maybe that's not the case."
"Are you saying that I awakened something in him?" Steve said.
"It's a possibility," Robin said softly. "Maybe he just needs time."
Steve smiled, feeling a little more hopeful than he had in days. Yeah, he could give Eddie all of the time in the world.
A few days later. . .
Steve was sitting on the couch, pouting as he stared at the blank TV screen. Every so often, he would glance at the direction of the kitchen, where the phone was, and hoped it would ring. Maggie Harrington plopped onto the coffee table in front of her son and placed his feet in her lap.
"Whatcha doing, Bebie?" Maggie asked.
"Wishing that the phone would ring," Steve said.
"Well, you know what they say about a watched pot," Maggie chuckled, but Steve didn't laugh. "Honey, you have to give him more time than this. Not everyone is like us."
"I know," Steve frowned. "I just don't want to lose him."
"No matter what happens, he'd be an idiot not to be a part of your life," Maggie said.
Thunder clapped loudly outside, and suddenly, there came the sound of hard rain beating against the roof. Steve jumped, and Maggie squeezed his feet to calm him down. A few moments later, the front door opened and closed.
"Mags, do you know anything about this wet metalhead loitering about outside? I don't think he belongs to anyone. I don't see any tags. Do you think Steve might like him?" John asked.
He and Eddie appeared in the door, a wide grin on his face. Meanwhile, Eddie's eyes were wide as he looked at Steve, his hair dripping wet.
"Dad!" Steve exclaimed, blushing.
Eddie pulled crushed, wet flowers out of his vest and held them out for Steve.
"These are for you," Eddie said, and Steve took them with a smile.
"Aw, he got him flowers," Maggie said, cooing.
"Mom, Dad, can you give us a minute?" Steve asked.
"You're right, Steve, he is cute," Maggie said, flipping up her thumbs at him.
"Mom!" Steve yelled.
"Come on, Mags," John said, pulling her out of the room.
"I'm sorry about that. I didn't even think about if your parents even know about you," Eddie blushed.
"Oh, we know, and we were so proud of Bebie when he came out to us!" Maggie yelled from the hallway. "Besides, we're both lavender married. I'm a lesbian and John's gay!"
"Mom!"
"Sorry, son, she got away from me!" John called. "Slippery little witch."
"Bebie?" Eddie asked in amusement.
"When I was little, I had this lisp, and I would pronounce my name like Stebe," Steve rolled his eyes. "Then mom kind of ran with the name."
"And it was the cutest little lisp," Maggie said, popping her head in. "You should have seen him when he was little. He was such a mama's boy. You know, I have a picture of him, trying to walk around in my heels. It's so - "
"Mom! Please!" Steve yelled, torn between laughing and crying.
"Mrs. Harrington - " Eddie started to say.
"Maggie," she corrected with a grin.
"Maggie, you know, if you wanted to talk about how cute Steve is, then we can have lunch, and you can tell me all the embarrassing stories about him then?" Eddie asked with a grin. "Okay?"
"Okay!" Maggie exclaimed and left the room.
"Sorry about them," Steve said, shaking his head.
"So, if they're, uh, lavender married, how did - " Eddie started to say.
"I'm adopted," Steve said.
"Ah," Eddie said, and suddenly, he pulled a rock out of his pocket. "I also found this because it reminded me of your eyes."
"Thanks," Steve said, grinning, clutching it to his chest.
"Look, when I said I wasn't like that, I thought that I wasn't like that, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I really am like that. It wasn't just because so many people assume that about me. I always scoffed at them because I'm a freak, so that must mean I must be like that too, right? You came into my life and woke me up. I've always been like that, I just didn't want to recognize it because I'm already different enough, even though I know that there's nothing wrong with being different," Eddie said. "I want to be with you, but I'm still sort of figuring things out."
"We can take things as slow as you want," Steve said.
"A little kiss wouldn't be too fast, though," Eddie grinned as he took Steve’s hands in his.
Steve leaned forward and kissed him gently, pulling him close. He broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against Eddie's.
"I think we can tell your parents to come back in now," Eddie laugh.
"Mom, Dad!" Steve called out.
Maggie came in with a pile of clothes and a towel.
"I brought you some clothes and something to dry off with," Maggie said.
"Thanks, I had completely forgotten that I was dripping on your carpet," Eddie said cheerfully.
When he came back, dressed in Steve's sweats, he plopped down next to Steve on the couch and snuggled into his arms.
"So, Steve always complained about how you guys are away a lot and how much he misses you," Eddie said. "Like an idiot, I assumed the worst. I think that's because of my own shitty dad, so I apologize because you guys are awesome."
"Well, the last few years have kind of been difficult," John replied. "We've been trying to retire my dad's insurance company for a while now so we can spend more time with Steve, but my partner of 15 years who has occasionally been my partner on and off as well, revealed to me that he's been embezzling from the company over the last few years so we have been trying to clean that mess up. We were supposed to hand over the company over to him, and now that's all fucked up. So, we have also been looking for a suitable and trustworthy replacement to take over the company that my dad built from the ground up, a company my dad built to be inclusive for everyone."
"Shit, that fucking sucks," Eddie said with wide eyes.
"It does fucking suck," John sighed. "But Steve and Mags here have been my rock. Couldn't get through this without them."
There was silence for a while and then Eddie leaned forward with a smirk.
"So, Maggie, where is this picture of Steve in your heels that you spoke of?" Eddie asked, and John laughed while Maggie shrieked.
"I'm going to get the photo album," she said and jumped up.
"You're in for it now, son," John said.
"Mom! Please!"
#stranger things#stranger things s4#eddie munson#joseph quinn#eddie stranger things#steve harrington#eddie munson lives#steddie#steve x eddie#steve harrington x eddie munson#john and maggie harrington#my names for steve's parents#steve has good parents#steve's parents are lavender married#bisexual steve harrington#bisexual eddie munson#steve is eddie's bisexual awakening#stranger things fanfiction#robin buckley#platonic stobin
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Whatever You Need - Daniel Ricciardo
Words: 3,517
Summary: After a shit one night stand, this was the last thing she expected to happen.
Note(s)/Warnings(s): Angst with a happy ending, Best Friends to Lovers. Panic/Anxiety Attack, Near Throwing Up, Implied/Referenced/Mentioned Sex, Pregnancy, Discussion of Abortions, Off Screen Abortion. I promise that this has a happy ending. Reader goes by the nickname Kola (call-uh)
Taglist | Masterlist | Patreon
Sitting down beside Daniel, she practically buries her face in the mug of coffee he had made for her. It’s near scalding hot making her hiss, but she still takes another drink before setting it down and slumping in the booth, a frown on her face, eyes screwed shut as she wills the caffeine to kick in.
“Y’alright, Kola?” Daniel asks, giving her a gentle nudge to the ribs. She has to smile at the nickname he gave her when they were barely five, mispronouncing the word Koala. Now nearly thirty years later it was a name she’s heard more than her actual name.
“I’m never having a one night stand again or just having sex in general.”
“Oh?” And she can hear his eyebrows raise.
Her eyes flutter open as he presses her coffee back into her hands. “He told me not to cum.”
Daniel’s eyebrows raise higher, “what?”
She nods, smiling though it’s fake. “Yep.” She pops the p. “Best part? I wasn't even close to finishing.”
He lets out a low whistle. “Did he at least?”
She sends him a look, cutting him off. “Really? Of course not. He gave a few more strokes, came in me, then practically collapsed on top of me. I didn’t even have an interest in getting myself off after.”
Daniel wraps an arm around her, pulling her into his side and she gladly pushes closer, resting her head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Kola.” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to her head. “Anything I could do for you?” His voice pitches lower and it makes her breath hitch, want simmering inside of her.
The words, the request is on the tip of her tongue. Because she knows if she said it that Daniel would. He’d gladly take her to his hotel room and take her apart. But the irrational fear of something going wrong and losing him forever because they finally cross the line from friends to lovers makes it way to the forefront of her mind and she shakes her head. “No, Danny.” She murmurs, and she can feel him slump a bit in disappointment. “Just need this.”
“Of course, Kola. Whatever you need.”
—
She stares numbly at the test results open on her laptop screen. Because they couldn’t be right, shouldn’t be right. But when she screws her eyes shut, rubs at them and then opens them, nothing has changed. The same thing is there. A hand flies up to her mouth as a sob starts to come out, tears leaving her eyes, because this isn’t what was supposed to happen.
Her other hand joins in covering her mouth as more sobs leave. And her brain is just repeating the word no as she tries to keep quiet not wanting to wake Daniel in the other room. The thought of Daniel has her stomach turning and she’s scrambling for the bathroom, nearly slamming the door shut behind her before her knees hit the hard tile in front of the toilet as she dry heaves into the bowl.
Her hands clutch at the toilet as nothing comes up, the sounds of sobs and heaving intermixing.
Eight weeks pregnant, eight fucking weeks. And she hadn’t sex with anyone in a year except for that stupid guy that couldn’t even make her cum. She shudders at the reminder of that night. And now she was pregnant with his baby. His baby and not Daniel’s. Her heart clenches painfully inside of her chest.
This wasn’t supposed to happen. She had always wanted it to be Daniel’s baby that she had. She wanted that with him, a family. She wanted the slow, sensual sex with him as they tried for a baby. She wanted the weekly progress pics as her belly grew, Daniel surely smiling behind the camera as he took every single one. She wanted his hand resting over her belly, where her womb was, as they tried. She wanted a ring on her finger, the day they met engraved on the inside. She wanted Daniel. All of that was supposed to happen. Her first baby was supposed to be with him. All of her babies were supposed to be with him. And now that was ripped from her. All because she stupidly decided to have a one night stand, wanting the edge taken off by something that wasn’t her own hands or vibrator. And instead she had only gotten more frustrated and pregnant.
She’s no longer heaving but there’s still a sick feeling in her stomach as she lets go of the toilet and curls up in the corner of the bathroom, arms wrapping around her knees as she presses her face against them. Tears still run down her face as she takes short, stuttering breaths.
She was alone and pregnant. She had no partner to share the weight with. It was just going to be her. The somewhat tentative progress she had started making in getting over her irrational fear of losing Daniel once they crossed the line into more, vanishing.
Her breath catches in her throat, her chest constricting, panic fully settling in and taking a hold of her body. She digs her nails into her legs hoping the pain will restart her breathing like it has before, but it doesn’t and her mind is starting to panic. She feels numb and she’s starting to lose the feeling of her bare skin underneath her fingers and nails.
Then there’s hands on her own, pulling them away, pulling her nails out of her skin. There’s a voice bouncing off the bathroom walls but she can’t hear any of the words, can’t lift her head to see it. But then her head is being lifted away from knees, a single finger she thinks lifting her chin.
Daniel’s face is blurry and she doesn’t know if it’s from the tears or how she still hasn’t taken a breath.
“Kola. Kola.” Her name is faint in her ears and Daniel’s face comes a bit into focus. “Breath, Kola. Breath for me.” And then one of her hands is placed on his bare chest, just over the heated skin where his heart lays underneath. “C’mon, Kola. Breath.”
Her intake of air is sharp, stinging, makes her cough at the force of it. Eyes closing at the pain.
“That’s my girl.” He murmurs, a hand now rubbing her back.
Her next few breaths are just as sharp, but slowly they transition into shaky breaths until finally her breathing is matching his. “Danny.”
“You alright, Kola? You haven’t had an attack that bad in a long time.”
“I’m okay.” Her voice is quiet with exhaustion and she tilts her head back, letting it rest against the wall, eyes still closed.
She can feel him looking at her disbelief, but he doesn’t say anything. Just stays crouched next to her.
Slowly opening her eyes, they focus on the patterned ceiling before she finally looks at Daniel, worry and care on his face. “Help me up?”
He nods immediately standing, her hand that had still been resting on his chest at the quick movement. And then he’s grabbing both of her hands, hauling her up. When she stumbles, he’s quick to wrap an arm around her. “Let’s get you to bed, ya?”
She nods, leaning into him.
Kola isn’t even surprised when instead of taking her to her room in the large hotel suite, he guides her into his. He helps her under the covers, adjusts the pillows for her before climbing in next to her. The two of them both turned on their sides to face each other.
His heart is thundering in his chest as he looks at her. Terror still somewhat grips him from waking up to the sound of sobs and then seeing her on the bathroom floor in the midst of one of the worst panic attacks he’s ever seen her have.
“Did something happen?” He asks, hand reaching out to intertwine their fingers, needing her touch.
“I got my test results back from my check up.”
His eyebrows furrow, remembering her going to the doctor for her yearly physical just a few days ago. “Did they find something?” He’s holding his breath as he waits for her answer, hoping, praying, that she isn’t sick. Doesn’t know what he’d do with himself if his girl, his world, was so sick that it sent her into a panic attack.
“Yeah.” The slow answered breath, makes his heart clench as he takes a shaky breath.
“What was it?” His voice is shaky. “I mean, is it serious?”
The question makes something strange cross her face, something like heartbreak and suddenly his hand is cold, fingers no longer intertwined with hers. And she’s withdrawn into herself, even scooted back a little, like she’s prepared for a blow. “I’m pregnant.”
He stares at her, mind scrambling, the words struggling to process. But when they do the terror that had been gripping him, the worry vanishes, replaced by joy and he’s cradling her face in his hands, pressing his lips to her forehead in a kiss that doesn’t work because he’s smiling too wide.
Because she’s pregnant. There’s going to be a little Kola in the world. Hopefully a little boy that will be just like her but with his pension for chaos. He doesn’t think his heart could take her having a girl first, a little girl that looks just like her, he’d never be able to say no to her, just like he can’t say no to her mum. Though he doubts he’d be able to say no to a little boy either. But then again a little boy first means that when they do have a girl, he’ll have help protecting her from stupid boys who can only think with their dicks and are dumber than a box of bricks.
“Really?” He questions, “I mean, fuck.” He pulls back a little, still holding her face as he gives a breathless laugh. “How far along?”
She stares at him, silence lingering between them for a moment. “Eight weeks. I’m eight weeks.” Her words are quiet and the look on her face, the way she had pulled away from him finally registers.
And his own joy, joy that he had let come over him without thinking about her, is gone. “I,” he opens then closes his mouth. “Do I,” he can’t make the words come out of his mouth, so he doesn’t. “Are we upset?”
She gives a hesitant nod and he watches as the fingers that had been intertwined with his, curl into her palm.
He struggles to find why she is. She wants kids, they want kids. It had always been something they talked about in the future. He had held her hand nearly three years ago when she got tested to make sure she could have kids after finding out about a friend having fertility issues. She had held his when he also got tested just to get all their ducks in a row.
Was she upset just because it was unexpected? Eight weeks meant it was from that dickhead that couldn’t even get her halfway there. Was it that? Because it was the result of a one night stand. A shit one at that. The memory of that morning still makes him angry. She rarely gave into the odd temptation of a one night stand and he hates that it wasn’t good for her. It’s easy to ignore the jealousy there that it was someone else she fell into bed with. It didn’t matter who they were with before, as soon as they crossed the line that would be it, it would just be them for the rest of their lives.
His hand slips from her face to the bed, but he keeps his one that’s between the pillow and her cheek. “Why are we upset?”
“It’s just me, Dan.” His brows furrowed in confusion. “I’m alone.”
He opens his mouth to protest, because what the fuck? She wasn’t alone, he was here, right here, but he can’t because she’s continuing, a heart wrenching broken look on her face.
“And it’s not yours. It’s supposed to be yours.”
Understanding and a little sorrow of his own fills him. “Oh, Kola.” He breathes, then gathers her in his arms, holding her close.
“You aren’t alone.” He murmurs. “Never alone.” He punctuates it by kissing the top of her head. Holding her this close and understanding her upset makes the question that he wanted to ask earlier come easier even if he still dances around it a little. “If and I do mean if you want this baby it will be mine. Maybe not biologically, but we know that doesn’t matter really.”
She tries pushing away, but his hold is too strong. “You don’t get it Daniel.”
“What don’t I get?” Frustration leaks into voice, hating that she’s trying to pull away from him after having already done so once tonight. “What don’t I get?” He asks again and uses her name, her actual name.
“It’s just,” her breathing has picked up a little, he can feel her legs move against his, and he realizes she’s flustered. “It was supposed to happen a certain way.”
He doesn’t say anything and she groans, pressing her head into his chest, trying to hide and he lets her for all of five seconds, wanting to see her face, needing to see it as arousal starts to burn inside him. “How was it supposed to happen?” He asks, voice low.
She stares at the bare skin of his chest, feeling more blood rush to her cheeks. “I,” she opens and closes her mouth, licking her lips. “We were supposed to be married.” Her voice is quiet, barely above a whisper.
He makes a low noise in the back of his throat, the hand on her hip tightening at the thought.
“My ring would have the day we met engraved on the inside.” She hesitantly rests her dominant hand over his heart and is emboldened by the way she can feel it racing. “It would be slow, not so slow that its torture but close. You’d barely pull out the whole time, wanting to make sure that when you do finish it would be as deep as it can get inside of me.”
His nostrils flair and he can feel his hardened cock twitch.
Her eyes flicker down to where he’s somewhat pressing against her and then she’s taking his hand off her hip, ignoring the noise of protest he makes and she slips them under her shirt before pressing his where her uterus is. “You’d have your hand here nearly the whole time. Just wanting to feel, imagining me getting bigger.”
“Kola,” he breathes.
Finally she lifts her head and their eyes meet, the need and desire in his eyes making her gasp. Her tongue darts out to wet her lips and he snaps.
His lips are on hers, his hand on her lower belly moving to grip at her hip as his other hand rests on the nape of her neck. She eagerly returns the kiss, just about moaning when he rolls onto his back and settles her on top of him, not breaking the kiss except for a brief moment when his lips catch more the corner of her mouth.
“Wanted this, wanted you for so long.” He tells her when they break apart.
“Me too.”
He grins at her and she finds herself grinning back. He presses a sweet, small kiss to her lips before looking at her slightly serious. “I meant what I said. Whatever you do want, I’m here, it’s your choice. This baby will still be mine if you want it.”
Her teeth sink into her bottom lip as she thinks. “I don’t know.” She thinks to earlier in the bathroom when she was sure that she was going to have the baby despite it just being her. To now with her and Daniel having crossed the line finally and she’s unsure. She knows that despite it not being Daniel biologically she’d love just as much as if it was so, but it also sits wrong, heavy inside of her that it’s not his. She thinks to his joy of finding out and feels her heart sink a little, because what if he changed his mind after and it wasn’t okay, which is unfair to Daniel because he rarely if ever changes his mind. It’s then she realizes as she finally gives it some thought that she’s already made her decision.
“I want an abortion.” She tells him, watching his face closely but nothing changes. He doesn’t even blink.
“Okay.” He nods and there’s a strange mixture of emotions in his chest, a little sorrow and a little glee, he pushes them both away.
“I’m worried though.”
His brows press together and he’s taking her hands in his, intertwining their fingers in an all too familiar gesture. “About what?”
“This isn’t fair to you and I know it’s not true.” She prefaces, because she doesn’t want Daniel to think she doesn’t believe him or have faith in him. “I’m just worried that after it’s all said and done, you won’t be okay with it.”
He breathes in through his nose. “Sometimes Kola, I’d like to kick your brain’s ass for making you think things like that.”
The seriousness in voice makes her laugh and she squeezes his hand. “Me too.”
“I won’t change my mind.” He promises her, before taking a deep breath, because if she could be honest with him about this, he could be honest about how he was feeling. “Truthfully, I’m a little sad about it.”
She nods, there was a part of her that was too. Overwhelmingly however it felt wrong to her.
“But also, and this might make me a bad person, I’m a little happy about it, that you don’t want a baby that’s not mine.” He gives a dark chuckle, taking one of his hands away from her to run it over his face. “God, that’s fucked. I’m fucked.”
“No.” She shakes her head, grabbing his hand back. “No, Daniel. I want an abortion because it feels wrong, that it’s not yours. I know that I would love it no matter what, wouldn’t love it less than the rest of our kids.” They both share a smile at that. “But, I don’t think I could go seven months of this with that feeling.”
“Okay.” He swallows a bit harshly. “Do you want me to go with you?”
“Please?”
“Of course.” He smiles, “Whatever you need.”
Six Months Later
“Daniel.” He groans at the sound of his name. “Daniel.” And this time there’s a shake to his shoulder.
“No.” He groans again. “It’s sleep time, Kola.” He mumbles, trying to pat her but patting the bed.
It’s silent for a moment and he can feel the sleep already trying to drag him under when suddenly there’s a thigh on either side of his hips and a weight on pelvis that has his eyes opening, blinking as they try to adjust to the darkness in the room. “Oh.” He mumbles, sleepily smiling at his wife and the slight pulse of lust that had stirred in his body from her straddling him turns to a small steady thrum as he remembers she’s his wife. “You want a midnight romp?” He wiggles his eyebrows. “Save a horse, ride a cowboy.”
His hands are already creeping under his shirt she had put on ready to pull it off when she shakes her head, something he can just barely see, and his hands go back to rest on her hips, thumbs rubbing at the warm skin, letting her take her time for whatever she needs from it at, he risks a glance at the clock and nearly groans as 3:19am shows.
“Daniel.” She finally says after a few minutes pass by.
“Hmm.” He hums, eyes fighting to stay open.
“I’m pregnant.”
His eyes fly open, left hand jerking away from her hip to turn on his nightstand filling the room with some light. “What?” He asks, staring at her.
She smiles down at him. “I’m pregnant.”
“Fuck off.”
She laughs, a few tears slipping down her face. “Uh huh. Afraid you're really stuck with me now.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, really.”
He’s surging up, hands moving quickly to cradle her face as he presses their lips together, tears of his own falling. “Thank you.” He mumbles, pulling away before pressing kisses all over her face, murmuring it over and over again.
“How far along are you?” He asks, a hand going down to her stomach, resting where a bump will eventually be.
“Eleven weeks.”
His eyes widened. “Eleven?”
She nods, smiling. “You work fast, Mr. Ricciardo. Only a week after we started having sex and you knocked me up.”
“Damn, I’m good.”
She laughs, but nods. “Apparently so.” She cards a hand through his curls, pressing a kiss to his brow. “Thank you, Daniel.”
“Of course, Mrs. Ricciardo. Whatever you need.”
---
Taglist: @ireadthensuetheauthors @cixrosie @gemofthenight @topguncultleader @peachiicherries @lpab @copper-boom
#daniel ricciardo x reader#daniel ricciardo imagine#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 imagine
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** Authors note. Obvious C3E91 spoilers.
[[ update, thanks to @ReaderOfDragons sending me an invite I'm now on AO3, and it's posted! I did make a few changes/updates/fixes - so read it there for the updated/better version ]]
Also, my first fan fic (and I don’t have an Ao3 invite yet, so I’m sharing here). The moments after played in my head, and the players didn’t act it all out, so I figured I would share tge version in my ''mind palace'. I’ll be sharing more art soon, now that my main job is on summer break.
Note that it switches perspectives. Also, pasting it here messed with my formatting (but I think I fixed most of it).
Faithful End
Chet couldn't hear the sounds of the metal clanking around him, only the ringing in his ears, as he stood in shock and disbelief. The air tasted of blood, sweat and red earth. Quickly his world snapped back into focus and he began to survey the battlefield. What remained of Otohan was charred and strewn about near the freshly made crater on the cave floor.
Orym.
Orym lay still and limp, covered in blood (surely both his and his foes), his sword in the nearby dirt.
A slight rise of his chest showed he was still alive, somehow.
He's alive.
Ash..
A quick look to where he had finally fallen at Otohans blade showed Imogen and Laudna rushing to aid him.
Chet rushed to Orym, knelt down, and fumbled in his pockets until he touched the cool glass of his last healing potion. He uncorked the bottle, pulling the limp Orym up and cradling him into position. “You did good, my boy.” He quietly croaked, as he carefully poured the red fluid into his mouth.
Orym’s chest rose, filling with air, and fell again as he started to exhale, then cough. Green, tired eyes opened and looked up into his own. Chet sighed in relief.
******
Orym coughed, the metallic taste of iron and the familiar herbal taste of a healing potion filled his mouth.
He hurt.
Everything hurt.
He just wanted to sleep, but he felt someone gently holding him, stroking his hair. He lazily opened his eyes, and saw the blue eyes of Chetney looking at him with concern.
Otohan. I have to kill Otohan and get everyone back safe.
With a new burst of adrenaline flowing through his veins he quickly, albeit unusually clumsily, pushed onto his feet. Intense green eyes, framed by the fresh blood that smeared his face, darted around.
There was an odd stillness on the battlefield.
Laudna and Imogen were clutched together.
Shaking.
In fear?
No. Crying. They were crying. Sobbing.
He lowered his eyes and saw an empty glass bottle abandoned near Imogen.
Alert green eyes shifted slightly, resting on Ashton. He was sitting next to them, face buried in a large stoney hand. He couldn't make out his words, but he knew Ash… “Fuck. Shit. Piss.” Surely.
His eyes shifted once more and discovered a newly formed crater, and the charred and bloody remains scattered around the red and now sparkling earth. The sight caused his heart to skip, until he recognized the features… Otohan.
Oh thank the Gods.
He hadn’t believed they would survive that fight, but his friends had pulled it off. He closed his eyes and worked to catch his breath… slow his heart rate. It was over.
It would be okay… he gave himself a moment to let the adrenaline subside, and opened his eyes again.
The sparking red soil caught his eyes now. Pieces of metal? Where did all the metal pieces come from?
The gears in his head began to put the information together, but it didn’t seem to want to click into place. His shifting eyes scanned the cave once more and fell on Fearne. His Fearnie…
He watched those big eyes of hers filling as she stepped into the crater bent down.
Wait, what happened… why was she so upset otohan was dead? Why were the others so upset. They won, somehow.
At least this fight. He knew it wouldn't be their last.
He scanned the cave again checking on his friends. Immogen and Laudna were looking pretty battered and drained, but not quite as rough as Ash. Then again, Ash always looked pretty rough. Chet (who had moved over to check on Everoa) looked real rough, but he had went down hard. Luckily FCG had helped him.
FCG. Did he escape? He had been running…
Movement caught his eye, and he looked over in time to watch Fearne stand, clutching a large metallic chunk… what remained of FCGs smiling face. The eyes were cracked and FCGs smile was now disjointed and crooked, but it somehow still felt… warm.
“Letters?” He heard the words croak out of him, as he looked into Fearne’s and then Chets eyes. He read their faces. Tight, with wet eyes. Feeling his heart shattering, he knew.
“No. Nonononono.” The words softly left his lips. Fearne, barely holding back tears, rushed to him. Her comforting arms gathered him up and Orym buried his face into her.
****
Ash woke up, feeling like he had been ran over by a dragon, but that was nothing new. He always hurt. Although he didn’t always feel this weak.
Having friends, with concerned faces, helping him up was new though. So he sat up, and then stared wide eyed at scraps of metal that had settled across the ground.
Why was there metal on the floor?
That color…
The same color as… The color of FCG.
He scanned the room, quickly taking in the destruction. The crater. The remains.
Why?! Why did he do that. We talked about that.
He knew that damn automaton was going to sacrifice himself one day… he had hoped he would get through to him, but no.
No one gets left behind.
But Letters was gone.
His friend was gone. Gone.
Bits spread everywhere across the cave.
He tucked his face into his hand.
“Fuck.
Shit.
Piss.
Damn it.
You self sacrificing litt….” The words that escaped his mouth registered in his brain, and his eyes flew wide with panic.
Wait.
Orym. She got Orym. I have to help Orym.
Eyes darted to where he had seen him fall, and saw Chetney holding him as he set down an empty glass bottle. Orym’s tiny body shuttered as he coughed awake. Ash felt his body exhale in relief.
Orym will be okay. He's a little guy, but the toughest guy I know.
He's okay.
He's okay.
He took a deep breath in an attempt to steady himself, wiped his eyes, and looked around the room again. So many metallic scraps littered the rusty red floor.
“Fuck. Shit. Piss.” He muttered angrily to himself, and punched the ground in frustration.
He vaguely took in Ferane running to Orym and Chet, and the other two witches clinging to one another for another moment before jumping up and rushing around to look for something.
He stood dumbfounded and unsteady, leaning against his hammer and lost in thought, until his eyes caught on an unnaturally bright glint of metal in the cave wall.
No one gets left behind.
The words echo in his head on repeat, but all that escapes his lips is “Fuck.”
He takes several slow strides as his feet lead him to the rocky wall near their exit.
The piece of metal, a distinct shape…
The coin. That. Fucking. Coin.
That fucking coin that he always trusted.
What a lot of damm good it did him.
He jammed his fingers into the rock around the metal, gripped firmly and yanked. The rock crumpled away easily and he palmed the coin, staring at it for a minute before slipping it into his pocket.
“We have to make this count” Chets scratchy voice stated matter of factly. Ashton looked over to see him snatching up the backpack.
“Right.” Ash muttered to himself, and he moved to help the others gather anything they could.
***
The blood and dirt covered halfling wiggled out of Fearne’s arms, so she reluctantly set him down gently, making sure he was steady enough on his feet before fully letting him go. His eyes darted around the debris littered on the ground. He knew, deep down, it was futile, but he helped them gather all the pieces they could.
Fresh Cut Grass.
His body may have been weak from exertion and damage, but Orym’s perception didn't fail him. He could sense Fearne following near him, as he maneuvered towards a shiny chunk that had caught his eye. He wearily crouched and picked it up, turning it over in his small hands carefully, avoiding the sharp edges. Familiar slash marks arched across it. Like blades of grass reaching for the sun, or swaying in the wind. Tiny, calloused fingers, stained a brownish red with the soil and dried blood, carefully caressed the recessed lines in the smooth metal.
Letters.
He closed his eyes and hugged the piece of metal tightly to his chest.
FCG.
Faithful Care Giver.
FRITA. Fuck.
What am I going to tell FRITA…
Unconsciously he gently rubbed the moons on his shoulder. The physical pain taking a backseat to the anguish that burned through him. It was not a new feeling. He didn't like it. He would rather feel the physical pain.
It should have been me…
Letters should be with FRIDA, and I would be with Will. And Dad.
Oh Dad, I failed.
Again.
This is too big, and I'm, I'm too li….
A firm hand gripped his shoulder, breaking him away from those spiraling thoughts. He glanced up, first to the hand, then up Fearne. Her expression was full of concern, her voice soft, warm, and comforting, “You okay?”
He didn't think he knew the answer to that yet, and he knew he couldn't talk without falling apart, so he simply flung himself around her in a tight hug. If she could feel the tears soaking into her skirt, she didn't say anything.
*****
Fearne was barely holding it together. FCG was gone. She had never lost anyone she loved like that. But her best friend needed her, so she focused on him. Orym was a hardened soldier, the Savior Blade of the Tempest. He fought steady and bravely. He was a little guy, but so strong and agile. She had never seen anyone do so many sit ups, or wield a sword with such grace and control.
But his heart was fragile, having already been broken, and not yet fully mended.
Not that it ever could be. Some wounds never fully heal. She was starting to understand that. Her heart began to crumple under the weight of their mutual loss, compounded by seeing the pain in Orym’s face. She could feel his rough, gasping breathing as he clung to her.
She couldn't fix their broken hearts.
So she gently rubbed small circles onto his back instead, pushing away the sad thoughts, and focusing on comforting him.
I can't fix this, but I can remind him that he's not alone.
Orym suddenly jerked his head away from her to look down the cave entrance. She could see the damp (and blood and dirt stained) spot he left behind… Although her clothes were already quite soiled before that. Chet had also glanced over his shoulder at the same time. They must have heard something.
Quietly but firmly Chet informed them “We have to move, we won't be alone here long.”
She watched Orym nod, his face now stern and determined.
A soldier's face.
Orym slipped the hunk of metal he had been gripping into his bag as Fearne lifted him, easily swooping him up and onto her shoulders. Man was he light! And so drained, his grasp weak as he held on. Being so drained from the fight, she was sure he couldn't move as fast as they needed to. And they needed to move fast. They needed to find a safe place. They all needed to rest.
***
“Let's go!” Chetney growled.
“On it!” Ashton raged and punched the wall where the exit was.
“We still need to find the …” Laundna’s frustrated statement was cut short.
“Found it!” Imogen exclaimed, briefly holding up the staff FCG had been carrying. Laudna stopped her search with a sigh of relief, and they made their way to the others.
Smart.
Imogen was smart. Orym had known for a while that she was leadership material. They would need the staff for it's ability to teleport everyone. Soon. Too bad it needed to recharge first. Not to mention, someone would need to attune to it.
Because…
Letters.
Letters was gone.
I failed. I failed Letters. I wasn't enough, even with the powers Nana Morey gave me.
Orym felt a firm squeeze on his leg, grounding him. Fearne kept one hand gripped firmly on his leg to make sure he didn’t slip off and she rushed down the tunnel.
He held onto her with as much strength as he could muster, as the remaining Bell’s Hells fled for their lives. He looked at his friends, all beaten and tapped out, but pushing themselves past their limits once again. Helping to steady one another and make sure everyone was keeping up. Orym hugged Fearne’s head tighter and nuzzled it a little. He had great friends. Weird, but great.
I couldn't save FCG, but for now I need to focus on getting the others home.
Home safe.
Alive. Somehow.
Dad and Will wouldn't stop fighting, and neither will I…
#critical role fanart#cr fanart#lyuenger#my art#bells hells#critical role#bg3 spoilers#bg3 fanfiction#cr spoilers#orym of the air ashari#cr fcg#rip fcg#letters#critical role spoilers#c3e91 spoilers
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im so sorry i could find any kind of a request rules thing anywhere so feel free tk just ignore this if need be but could you write for gunwook where him and reader nearly break up but it has a happy ending💘💘
inlove with a ghost
pairing ⇆ zb1 park gunwook x reader
genre ⇆ angst ; hurt with comfort ; non-idol au ; near breakup
wc ⇆ 1.3k
cw ⇆ i'm not that good at angst read at own risk, cursing, wook is not rlly a good bf oops, but he could be!!
two hours.
two hours have passed since gunwook promised he was on his way, and fifteen more minutes since you've sent three follow up messages asking where he is. you are currently debating washing your face and changing back into sweatpants as it seems like your boyfriend had no intention of showing up.
the initial plan was for gunwook to pick you up at your place around four, you two would walk around, and decide on a place to eat afterward. and this will be the first time you'd see him in person after two long weeks of his busy schedule taking up most of his time.
that is if he even shows up.
you're giving him another five minutes. another five minutes and you swear if he isnt here by then you're changing into sweats and taking a nap.
a minute goes by, another,, another,,, another,,,,
four minutes should've been enough.
in a huff you dejectedly slip off your nice shoes that you happened to clean just for today, the purse that you literally never wear on a normal occasion, and the hairclips you dug through your accessory drawer to find. you throw all three somewhere around the room hapzardly, not wanting to see the evidence of your efforts to look presentable for the date anymore.
ten minutes have passed since then, and true to the internal promise you made to yourself, there you lay. face first on your bed, softly sobbing into the pillow.
a click alerts you and causes you to sit up, and you find gunwook at the entrance to your room holding your shoes, hairclips, and purse.
"y/n?"
silence.
you turn away from him, then a beat passes and you feel the bed dip under his weight and the sheets rustle quietly.
"y/n." he tries again, softer this time. and you can basically hear the apology in the way he says your name.
"don't say sorry gunwook, i know you are." you mumble quietly.
gunwook apparently has nothing to say to that as he doesn't respond, and if you weren't so hurt right now you'd get up to get a look at his face. wanting to see what emotions would plague it. would his eyebrows pinch together? would the corners of his lips tremble downwards ever so slightly?
you sigh as you speak the next words. "i think we should call it."
"...what do you mean? call what?"
"this. our relationship."
you finally situate yourself to face him properly, and you were so spot on with his facial expression you scared yourself with how well you knew him.
"what? y/n i—"
a breath. he takes a breath, to calm himself you'd guess.
"y/n. don't say things like that, okay? i'm so so sorry. i'll make it up to you i swear."
"thirteen."
"what?"
"thirteen times, you've done this."
gunwook finally understands and mutters under his breath, cursing at himself and squeezing his eyes shut before groaning.
"shit, y/n. i didn't know."
"thirteen times i've asked to see you and you were either late or bailed on me. gunwook i'm your partner. i shouldn't need to have to make appointments just to see you!"
"y/n, i'm busy... you know that. it's not that you're not important but i try!"
"i know you're busy! and i know you try. but you can't expect me to be okay with all of this nothing you're giving me."
he's taken aback and it shows. nothing? that can't be true. he might not be the best at prioritizing you but he certainly doesn't give you nothing. right?
you shift due to the bed not being occupied by gunwook anymore, and you watch him stand with his hands on his hips like a father about to scold you. you would laugh if you weren't on the verge of bursting into sobs.
"that's not true. no, i can't— why would you say that? i text you every morning, and i try to keep you updated with what i'm doing and you know. i'm trying here okay? please just..."
you stand, directly placing yourself infront of gunwook and taking his hands.
"gunwook, i love you. you know that but, i can't be in a relationship that stands still."
"y/n stop, don't speak like that."
tears sit at the edge of his eyes, threatening to spill and yours start doing the same.
"i know you have alot of things on your plate, okay? i know how badly you want to keep me and all of those things at the same time, but i know you can't manage it."
you squeeze his hands, and gunwook's bleary and tear-soaked eyes find yours again before you continue to speak.
"this is already affecting the both of us, and i know you don't want to choose so i will do it for you. we need to break up."
"no no no y/n, stop."
his eyes flutter shut again and it's your turn to be taken aback when gunwook starts lowering himself to the ground. you grab his arms, anticipating that he would fall but you're mistaken as his knees hit the wooden floor with a thud and his hands release yours in favor of gripping at the sides of your sweats.
"i can't. 'm sorry but i can not let you go. i'll do better i swear just— let me try again. don't do this to us."
his words come out shakey and stuttered, he loses his breath multiple times inbetween words and the mere idea of him hurting like this makes you hold back gasps of your own as hot tears spill down the curve of your cheeks.
"gunwook..."
you can't, it hurts too much to be with someone who's basically never there. to be inlove with a ghost.
"please." and a tear gathers itself at the corner of his lip.
he's begging, he's placed himself below you physically and emotionally. you can feel his desperation from the grip he has on your sweats. you can't bear to watch it and at the same time you can't look away, unable to shake the conflicting thoughts of what ifs from your head.
"i promise y/n, i promise."
"don't give me empty promises gunwook, you know i hate that."
"they're not empty. i promise, with my whole being i'll be better. just don't leave me."
you continue to stare at him, absentmindedly chewing on your lip anxiously. you were already tired, this was making you even more tired, you just wanted to end things and move on and be done with it and be free from all the feelings you were feeling and—
"y/n."
your thoughts are cut short by a call of your name, and as your eyes come back into focus you realize gunwook has let go of your sweats in order to grab your hand.
he brings your pointer to his lips slowly, and his places a delicate kiss on it, and you melt on the spot. his kisses are so small. if you closed your eyes you could pass it off as breeze passing by, as though he wasn't actually there and it was your mind playing tricks on you. but he was there, with your own two eyes you could see the equal parts of affection and regret he placed on your fingertips. it hurt so bad but you needed it, you needed this. for him to be there, infront of you, loving you.
you could give him another chance as long as he loved you like this again.
"okay."
"okay?" gunwook squeezes your hand, which lingers just by his chin he lowers it from his lips.
"i'll stay. but we have to talk about this, properly. okay?"
he stands up, startled but hopeful.
"yes, of course. i'm sorry y/n."
"i know."
his lips quirk sadly at that, but atleast he knows this isn't the end for you.
atleast he knows that he's still yours, and he'll strive hard to keep it that way.
a/n ⇆ this is long overdue i'm afraid :( just been having no motivation also school likes to keep me busy so. anyway here!! i don't know if i'll be posting consistently again but i'll do my best... just like gunwook!!
#zb1#zerobaseone#zb1 x reader#zb1 imagines#zb1 fanfiction#zb1 gunwook#zb1 park gunwook#park gunwook#park gunwook x reader#gunwook#gunwook x reader#zerobaseone gunwook#angst with a happy ending#light angst#hurt/comfort#breakup#ayla's requests
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Haunted Memories
Request: The reader has been tagging along with the guys while they are on tour. She is in a relationship with Noah. They are back in their hometown and the reader is walking through the venue when she is stopped by her ex, which she had an abusive past with. She immediately gets shaken up by seeing him. Instead of hanging out on the side stage to watch the guys like she normally does, the reader heads back to the bus. Noah notices that she isn't around before and when they are on stage, so he starts to wonder where the reader is. After the show is over, he finds out from someone backstage that she had went back to the bus before the show even started. When he gets on the bus, he finds the reader distraught and extremely upset. Maybe something along those lines.
Warnings: talks of physical abuse lots of angst but ends in fluffy goodness
Word Count: 2100
Noah Master List
You couldn't believe it. Of all the places in the world, the final show of the tour had to be in your home town. Noah had warned you about this, but you didn't think it would affect you so much.
You found yourself wandering around the venue, feeling like a ghost, while Bad Omens rocked the stage. This place was haunted by your past. You had so many memories here, some that made you smile and some that made you shiver.
You remembered the day Noah left Virginia, the day your best friend ripped your heart out. You sobbed when he hugged you goodbye, but you also cheered him on.
You wanted him to follow his dreams, even if it meant leaving you behind. You wanted to go with him, but you had things to finish in Richmond, things that couldn't wait.
You sighed as you walked to the merch section, looking for comfort in the colorful shirts. Buying new shirts from all the tours was your guilty pleasure. You told Noah once that you would make a quilt out of them someday, a quilt that would keep you warm and remind you of him when you couldn't tour with the band.
"Y/n?"
You spin around and freeze. There he is, the monster who ruined your life, the one you thought was locked up for good. Your heart sinks to your stomach, and you feel sick as your memories flood. How could this happen? Why did you have to bump into him here, of all places?
Why couldn't Noah be by your side to protect you from him? Your hands tremble as you back away, wishing you could vanish.
You try to speak, but your throat is dry, and your voice is gone.
He moves closer to you, a wicked grin on his face. He pretends he didn't do anything wrong, he didn't send you to the hospital with broken bones and bruises, and he didn't make you fear every man who looked at you.
"It's so nice to see you I-, I went by your parent's house last year. I wanted to apologize for, you know, things that happened in the past." He bites his lip. You can tell he's nervous, but you don't know if the regret in his voice is being faked or not, "I've changed a lot." He tells you.
You shake your head in disbelief, "Fuck you!" You roughly say. "You don't get to walk back into my life and say shit to me." You turn to walk away, feeling your adrenaline rush. Who did he think he was? Did he really think an apology would make you swoon and forgive him?
You feel a hand grab your wrist, and he pulls you back to him. You feel like you did all those years ago, "I've changed. I'm sorry for what I did. I went through therapy, and they said the best thing I could do was ask for forgiveness. It's part of the program I'm in. I'm not heavy in addiction anymore. I don't even know that person, and I'm so ashamed! Please just listen to me. Please, I'm sorry."
You feel your body tremble as you pull your wrist out of his grasp, "You knew I'd be here, didn't you?" You look down at his hand that’s reaching for you again. You quickly swat it away, "Don't fucking touch me. If my boyfriend sees you, of all people even near me, you will end up in the hospital."
He nods knowingly. "I know you're dating Noah now. I'm not here to step on your toes. I just need you to forgive me." He desperately says like this was the last thing on his list before he could move on.
You snap your head back, shocked by his words, baffled by how he could ever expect you to forgive him. “You don’t deserve a fucking thing from me.” You hissed. “I hate you. You shattered me beyond repair. You twisted me, and I could never heal from what you did. You wrecked all my chances of happiness, you ruined what I could’ve been for Noah, and you dare to ask for my forgiveness?” You snarl through gritted teeth. “You think you’re worthy of that?” You pause, feeling your jaw clench. “I hope you die with the guilt of what you did. I hope it torments you every time you touch another woman.” Your eyes fill with tears, “But most of all, I hope everyone you love abandons you.”
You see his eyes turn black, and before you can react, his hand is flying towards your face, just like old times. You shut your eyes, bracing for the pain, but relax when you hear a familiar voice, "Whoa there, buddy. What the fuck is it that you think you're doing?" You hear Steven's voice ring in your ears, and you open your eyes to see that Steven has David's arm in his hand over your head. He roughly throws it aside and quickly pushes you behind him. "I don't know who the fuck you are...but I suggest you get the fuck out of here before I cause a scene."
Steven wraps his arm around your shoulders, pulling you close as he walks away from David. He looks down at you feeling your body slightly shaking still, "I'm not going to ask if you're OK because obviously, you're not, but who the fuck was that and do we need security to follow you around from now on?"
You shake your head no, your eyes landing on the ground as you walk, "He'd nobody, and I don't want to talk about it."
Steven nods understandingly, "Let me walk you back to the bus. I'll know you're safe there, and I'll let Noah know where you are, okay?"
"I don't really want Noah to know about this." You say sheepishly.
Steven bites his lip, knowing he's about to say something you won't like, "You know I can't do that."
You take a deep breath, "I know."
After the show, Steven immediately finds Noah to talk to him about what he witnessed.
Noah clenches his fists as Steven tells him what he saw. “I don’t know who the bastard was, she wouldn’t tell me. She shut me out, and I didn’t want to push her.”
He wishes he could have been there instead of Steven, but he’s grateful to him for stepping in and stopping the assault before it happened. He knows if he had been there and seen a man try to hurt you, he’d lose it. He’d end up in jail, but he wouldn’t regret it. He’d smile in his mug shot, knowing he did the right thing. Whether you were his girlfriend or not, you would always be safe with him.
Before Noah opens the bus door, he takes a deep breath. He asked the others to leave you alone for a while before they came to check on you. He wanted to make sure you were okay, or at least not falling apart.
He knew you hated showing your vulnerability in front of anyone. Even with him, you tried to act strong and hide your pain. He opens the door, scanning the bus for you. He doesn’t see you anywhere until he hears a faint whimper from the bunk area. His heart breaks at the sound of your cry.
Noah walks softly toward the noise, stopping in the middle of the hallway. He sees you lying in his bunk, staring blankly at the ceiling. He notices the tear stains on your cheeks and the redness in your eyes.
You don’t look at him as he kneels by the side. He gently reaches for your hand, making you flinch out of your daze. Noah wants to kill the man who did this to you. He wants to smash things and yell at the world. He wants to make the pain go away. You didn’t deserve this. How could anyone be so cruel to you?
"Baby," he coos while brushing your hair out of your face, "What can I do to help?"
You tilt your head finally looking him in the eyes. You wipe your burning cheeks and turn on your side, patting the spot next to you.
He nods and slides into the bunk beside you, wrapping his arms around you as you snuggle close. He tenderly strokes your hair as you cry into his chest, letting out all the emotions that have been bottled up inside you. He holds you firmly, making you feel safe and loved in his embrace.
“I don’t want to feel this way.” You say in a shaky voice. “It’s like every time I think I’m healing, something triggers me, and I feel worthless and broken. The voice in the back of my head…” You pause, gasping for air, “It keeps telling me I’m not good enough, and I want to be good enough for you, but I’m so damaged, and I know you’ll leave me too because I don’t deserve you.”
Noah’s face twists with confusion and pain, wondering how you could ever doubt yourself so much. “Y/n…” He says softly, pulling away from you slightly, lifting your chin, and making you look into his eyes, “I will never leave you.” He kisses your nose and smiles gently, “If you ever want to break up with me, that’s your decision, but I’ll do everything in my power to keep you. I was serious when I said I was going to marry you someday. I know you might have thought it was a joke, I mean we were only fourteen, but I meant it with all my heart.” He says, pulling you back to his chest. “Was it David?”
He feels you nod your head against his chest. “Yeah.” You whisper, barely audible.
Noah feels his blood boil, he’d heard rumors from your friends about what he did to you, and he remembered the hospital visits, the bruises and the scars. You didn’t tell him the truth back then, but you opened up to him before you became official, just in case he changed his mind.
He kisses your forehead and whispers, “ I’m sorry he hurt you. I’m so sorry he made you feel this way. But you’re not alone. I’m here for you, always. I love you more than you can imagine. You’re beautiful, you’re strong, you’re amazing. And I’m not going anywhere, I promise. You’re stuck with me.”
You feel his words warm your heart, and you wrap your arms around him, holding him tight. You feel a flicker of hope, a spark of happiness. You smile and say, “I love you. Thank you for being here and being you. I’m not going anywhere either, I promise. You’re stuck with me, too.”
He laughs and hugs you closer, feeling a wave of relief and joy. “Sounds perfect to me. We’re going to be OK, you know that, right? We’re going to get through this together. We’re going to have a happy ending.”
You nod and kiss his chest, feeling loved. “I believe you. We’re going to be OK. We’re going to have a happy ending.” You repeat.
He nods and kisses your hair, feeling love and hope. I love you, Y/n."
“I love you, Noah. I love you more than words can say.” You cuddle up to him, feeling his heartbeat, warmth, and love. You close your eyes, feeling worn out from all the emotions of the day, and drift off to sleep, feeling safe and happy in his arms.
You dream of a better future with him, where you’re both happy and free—a future with only happy endings.
Tags: @thisbicc @yumikitten @lma1986 @chemicallady
#noah sebastian oneshot#noah sebastian fluff#noah sebastian fic#noah sebastian angst#noah sebastian fanfiction#noah sebastian x y/n#noah sebastian x reader#noah fic
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Hobie brown and young! troubled teen reader hcs (more like oneshot)
Note-this is the first time I’ve tried writing for him and if u get his personality wrong please forgive me.
TW: reader has issues, swearing, slight mentions of sucidal feelings. Also I’m not British so idk any slang. So if anyone is British out there I’m sorry. And I dunno if I’m gonna write more for him I gotta figure it out.
GN reader, also reader is a younger teen like 13-16
You had met him purely by accident, you ran into him while not paying attention in the spider society headquarters, he didn’t get upset really seeing that you did it by accident but it did catch his attention when you were apologizing like you had ran into Miguel.
He noticed the way your hands gripped your sleeve almost as if you were mentally beating yourself up because you ran into someone. “It’s fine”. He said with a small smile trying to assure you he wouldn’t body slam you into the concrete like your mind had overreacted because of bumping into him.
He saw you a couple more times around headquarters, spacing out,fiddling with your hands, etc. he also noticed how you stayed at headquarters a lot not seeming to wanna go home for whatever reason.
The time that you had actually got a proper introduction to him and not bumping into him or catch him looking at you was when Gwen befriended you and introduced you to him.
Overtime he kinda saw the way you would try to be near him without saying anything almost like his presence gave you comfort. He never pointed it out nor did he seem to mind when you went to his place to be around miles, Gwen, and Pav you would always sit near him.
Sometimes he caught you staring at his stuff, posters, pins, wall decor, all that. You seem to like how his place was decorated and he felt a little flattered.
The first time you had started talking to him and showing interest in his stuff by speaking was when you asked where his pins were from. “Made them myself.” He replied with a smile and you nodded in understanding. One time you had watched him play his guitar and you kinda just stood there and watched amazed at his playing, he didn’t mind. It’s not like you were being a bother just by watching with big eyes and being completely focused on it.
The first time you opened up was when you had a fight with your parents about something so small and for some reason you went to his universe. “Y/n? Mate what you-“ “can I stay here for tonight?” You cut him off before he could finish, and he noticed the tears in your eyes as it’s obvious you’re not doing too good.
“The couch is free you can sleep there for tonight.” He replied softly as he threw a blanket to you. “You caught it with a tight grip and nodded as a thanks and went to the couch and laid on it, you did have to move a pair of shoes out the way but other wise it was pretty comfortable.
In the morning you woke up to Hobie making himself some breakfast and you sat up and walked over to him, blanket still wrapped around you.
“Thank you for letting me stay the night”. You thanked him as he gave you a soft smile, he then took a sip of his coffee . “No problem mate, you wanna talk about what happened?” He asked and you sighed as you explained everything from your parents being assholes and constantly feeling like you wanna end it all.
He put his coffee down as he stared at you with a concerned look as tears started falling. “Mate, you need a hug?” He asked softly as it’s pretty much the only thing he can offer as he watched a young teen just tell him everything on why they feel like shit constantly.
You nodded as he then gave you a massive hug mainly cause he’s 6’5 and you felt safe, protected, like nothing could harm you. “I’m just tired of everything and my parents don’t help, and being a spider person it just-“ you sobbed into him as he rubbed your back keeping his voice soft and low. “Shh mate it’s ok, it’s alright your parents aren’t here and I’m not gonna judge ya, ok?”
He didn’t move or let go till you did and when you stopped crying he wanted to make sure you felt at least a little better so he tried to think. “How about this, we go get ya cleaned up and go somewhere, you ever had fish and chips?”
You shook your head as you looked up at him and he only smirked a little trying to lighten your mood. “There’s this small shop around here we can go get some, plus their food is really good not like that rubbish that big company’s produce.” He explained as it got a small smile from you. “I would like that”. You responded as you put the blanket that’s currently wrapped around you on the couch.
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You know. If Crocodad Real. How would Luffy even react if he found out. Like really, how the fuck would he feel about it.
'Cause like how I went over in this post (briefly at the end), we don't even know how Luffy feels about Crocodile as he is right now, so can you imagine how that bombshell would impact things
Like my running theory is that Luffy still hates Crocodile but maybe not quite as much as pre-Impel Down since he kiiinda owes him etc
And Luffy does not seem to give a shit about blood connections, at least not that much. Like don't get me wrong, Luffy's family are the people who were there for him when he was a child, those are the people he cares about and his bio-parents don't really matter.
But also, honestly, I think the reason Luffy doesn't give a shit about who his parents are is because he doesn't know them. Luffy cares about people who he knows and likes, and while he doesn't give a shit about Dragon right now, it's arguably because he simply just doesn't know him. If the two actually get to meet and know each other, like if Luffy takes a liking Dragon, he'll probably accept Dragon as his dad and as his family. But on his own terms. It's up to Luffy to decide
And that's why like. How would Luffy react to finding out he has another dad and that one is fucking Crocodile. Because he already hates the man. It would not be happy news for him I'm sure
The other thing is that normally Luffy does not give a flying fuck about people's sad backstories. He didn't care to hear what happened to Nami and her village for example, because what really mattered was that there was a person he cared about who was deeply hurt and in danger and he wanted to help said person.
And that's where I'm so torn. Because on one hand, it would be perfectly on-brand for Luffy to not give a shit of Crocodile had a sob story to tell. But also, I could imagine Luffy being so fucking confused over the news that he'd want to hear the truth of like, who what where how why, in detail. So that, you know, he could make his own decision and figure out if he wants to considder Crocodile is other dad or disown him.
Like, both feel like things Luffy would do
So really, would the real deciding factor might be just... the circumstances where Luffy finds out???
God knows, I can not imagine Crocodile himself telling Luffy anything ever. The kid already hates him, he knows it, so he'd probably think it'd be for the best if Luffy never found out
So how else could Luffy find out then?
As far as we know, the only other person who could confirm it would be Dragon himself, and considdering how he probably feels about his ex (see: Alabasta Coup Attempt), I can't imagine him wanting to talk about Crocodile to Luffy in lenght or in a positive light.
Like I can't imagine Dragon wanting to tell Luffy at all is the point, not unless he wanted to like apologize to Luffy because it is arguably his fault Luffy and Crocodile fought in Alabasta to near-death to begin with. (Sidenote since we don't know how the break-up happened to begin with, it's totally possible Crocodile could've asked Dragon to never let their kid find out what happened to his "mom")
And now, this is where I'm gonna go completely off the rails, but. As I was wondering if there was any other way Luffy could find out...
S-Croc is made with Crocodile's DNA.
(And actually before I even go into S-Croc, super quick sidenote: If Kuma can extract memories out of people and allow other people to literally see them... Like I can't tell if Kuma's memories got absorbed by Bonney when she looked into them or if Kuma's Memory Bubble is still on Egghead, but if viewing the memories isn't the same as having them inserted into a vessel permanently... Like if Kuma isn't turbo-dead, could there be a scenario where we have Kuma (or S-Bear) yeet out Croc's memories and have Luffy just look into them? Because god knows Crocodile might just refuse to speak about it and that could be the only way to get The Whole Truth if Dragon doesn't want to talk about it either?)
(Of course, Crocodile would understand just How Persistent Luffy is so if Luffy just kept on annoying him about it, Crocodile could maybe give up eventually because he knows he can't get Luffy to piss off until he spills the beans)
So currently the Strawhat's plan is for them to go and escort the Vegapunks to Elbaf (if nothing goes funny after the flashback is over, which remains to be seen)
2. There is the mystery of what sex S-Croc is going to be, because there is a possibility that if Crocodile is trans then his Seraphim could be pre-T (though this entirely depends on whether or not Ivankov's HRT changes even the DNA of person. Since it's MAGIC HRT I would prefer it to, not gonna lie, and I would not appreciate any "you may look different but your DNA will tell the truth!" rhetoric in the story but I may be asking too much from Oda)
3. And there's also the mystery of what Devil Fruit ability S-Croc might have, since all the Seraphim have been given Fruit powers, and we know Vegapunk can't replicate Crocodile's Sand Logia.
All things considdered, I think the actual, most likely known ability S-Croc might end up with would be like, Mr 3's wax powers (hilariously), mainly because I could imagine it being flexible enough to work in Crocodile's fighting style, so it'd be the easiest for S-Croc to adapt to (like if you can make anything from wax, then why not sharp blades to fling at people) (Also we know Vegapunk would have access to this power since Mr 3 was in Impel Down, when they also got Daz' powers)
But also I had joked before how it'd be funny if S-Croc was a Crocodile Zoan for no reason. Like it'd be fitting since Crocodile was already the Only Logia of the OG Shichibukai, so making his Seraphim the Only Zoan would be funny as hell (if it's even possible, which we can't say if it will/won't be). Additionally, making him a Crocodile Zoan would be hysterically on-the-nose.
(Sidenote: If there was a crocodile Zoan Fruit, what sub-category do you think it'd fall into? Like would it be Ryu Ryu like all the dinosaur-themed Zoans are, or maybe even a different model of Uo Uo (same as Kaidou)? Since "wani" could be considdered a different type of serpent-dragon, and if Vegapunk was researching how to recreate Kaidou's fruit, it's plausible he might've accidentally recreated some other related-fruit in the process or afterwards?? (Also since Kaidou's Uo Uo is a specific model (Seiryu) it would make sense if there was another Uo Uo model Fruit, and this could be an excelent opportunity to use it))
The thing about Zoans though is that, as it's been brought up once or twice before, Zoan fruits can kind of have a "mind of their own" and influence the user in unexpected ways.
And as all we Crocodad Truthers know.
Crocodiles are protective of their babies.
ALSO: The Seraphim do have enough personal will-power that they may (slightly) disobey orders they've been given. Case-and-point, S-Snake undoing the Petrification on the Strawhats after Luffy asked her to, since S-Snake is fond of Luffy just like Hancock is
Sidenote, it was kind of made a point how Vegapunk considdered his artificial replica of Kaidou's dragon fruit a compete failure simply because instead of a blue dragon, the user would turn into a pink one instead.
So if Vegapunk tried to make a Seraphim of Crocodile, knowing full-well he couldn't even give the Seraphim the same ability as the OG, and then the Seraphim turns out the wrong sex for no reason?? I could see him being confused as hell and considder S-Croc "a failed Seraphim"
So really, all we'd really need to happen would be for the Strawhats to somehow encounter the remaining three Seraphim while escorting the Vegapunks to Elbaf. Mind you, IDK how that could even happen since as far as we know they've been deployed the Emptee Bluffs
And then just have S-Croc either disobey orders to hunt Luffy or even even have him be protective of Luffy (following that Zoan Instinct, one even he can't explain, it's just Instinct). Have Sanji be like "hey why the fuck is this one a girl, isn't it supposed to be Crocodile", followed by Vegapunk explaining this Seraphim was a failure for reasons even he can't understand
Then have Jinbei remember the conversation Crocodile and Ivankov had at Impel Down (suspicious considdering Ivankov's abilities and this "failed Seraphim"), and maybe if Crocodile had any involvement with the Revolutionaries and Robin was suspicious of him she could even bring that up
Along with any other minor details that may be bothering the crew about the whole deal
And so if the Strawhats and Vegapunk just put all their braincells together and rubbed them real hard, they could maybe come to a hypothesis as to why S-Croc is a "failure" and protective of Luffy, and maybe even a potential explanation as to why The Real Crocodile was protective of Luffy in Marineford for no fucking reason
And maybe, just maybe, Vegapunk could confirm that suspicion with a DNA test. All he needs to do is check Luffy's and compare it to Crocodile's.
Not sure Luffy would want to do the DNA test, like knowing Luffy he might prefer to just ask Crocodile in person if they ever ran to each other again
But boy, if he somehow did agree to a DNA test, and there was a match... oh boy
But again. This entire scenario is BEYOND off-the-rails. Technically plausible! But honestly if Luffy is ever gonna find out (assuming Crocodad Real) then it's gonna be from Dragon
I just wanted to get the theoretical scenario out of my system okay, I had to get the brainworms out of my brain
#Moon posting#OP Meta#OP Spoilers#Crocodad#Sir Crocodile#Long post#You know I wasn't going to yeet this out of my drafts for a while but since I brought up S-Croc in the last post I figured why not#Since I went off speculating about S-Croc here in detail#Let's just get it out of my system#I'm so facinated by S-Croc I want to see that little shit in action so bad#My other assumption for what ability S-Croc could have would maybe be Magellan's Venom Fruit#Since that one is shockingly a Paramecia! AND Vegapunk would have access to it! He could replicate it!#And Crocodile did have his poison hook so like. Sure#I'm still putting my money on Doru Doru though#ALSO to circle back to the original subject (how would Luffy react if he found out)#It's entirely plausible that he might never find out even if Crocodad was real#Like there's that whole thing about Oda telling Mayumi Tanaka that Luffy's mother wasn't important to the story YEARS ago#And like. It's possible it was a white lie. It's possible Oda could've changed his mind. OP was meant to end at Alabasta at one point#It's possible that if Luffy doesn't have a mom but two dads then Oda's statement would still be true#But it's also possible Crocodile could be Luffy's other dad and it could never play into the story in a meaningful way#Like we the readers could find out just to understand the beef between Crocodile and Dragon etc#And Luffy never finds out#Nightmare scenario. I will cry.#But frankly might be just the most likely one
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Ask Jaune is kratos grandson. Team CREM Isabel to learn what happens when you touch one of his kin at the fall. The brother gods are lucky they ain't got shit to do with this.
The End Beginning
Everywhere Kratos looked, he saw only chaos. As much as he desired to join the fight against the invading Grimm, his family came first. Unfortunately, that meant Jaune, his grandson, was left behind while he guided the rest of his family to the bullheads. He would have to come back for Jaune.
"Grandpa, wait-!" Saphron called to him while her wife held their crying son close.
"I must go back for Jaune!" He barked in reply.
"But-!"
"Let him go, Saph." His son replied. The two men looked to each other, and both nodded. "Keep him safe."
Kratos nodded again, then ran from the bullhead. It roared as it took to the sky behind him, now filled with evacuating citizens. A griffon attempted to charge the aircraft, only to find its head had been separated from its neck. Kratos held his hand out as his family escaped and his axe returned to his hand.
He then joined the Battle for Beacon.
----------------------------------------------
Jaune and Pyrrha fled from Beacon Tower, panting as Ozpin was left to battle the newly made Fall Maiden alone. Pyrrha then looked to the top of the tower, noticing the flare of light high above.
"Hang on, I'll call Glynda." Jaune pulled out his scroll. Before he sent the call, Pyrrha's locker landed with a crash behind him. He hurried around to where a now empty locker sat. "Pyrrha, what are you doing?!"
"I have to go, Jaune." Pyrrha replied, not taking her eyes off the tower. Save, only, for when a horrible shriek echoed from above.
A Grimm, one far more massive than any they had ever face before, landed with a crash on the top of the tower. It screamed as rocks and debris fell to the ground from above. As if on instinct, Pyrrha ran for the tower.
"Pyrrha, wait!"
"I have to, Jaune!"
"Why?!" He shouted. "Just wait until-!"
"I can't, Jaune!" She shouted back. "This... This is my destiny!"
"Then... Then let me go with you."
"You can't!"
"Why not?!"
Pyrrha clenched her first, struggling to look Jaune in his beautiful, blue eyes. Much like how she allowed her passion take hold of her, she too took hold of Jaune and pressed her lips to his. Tears began to flow from her eyes as he returned her kiss, confirming his feelings for her were as mutually felt as his. She then let her hands slip below to his chest...
...and shoved him into her locker, slamming it shut.
"PYRRHA, NO!" He smashed his fist on the inside of the door. She could only reply with a sob as she tapped on her scroll, pushing in the coordinates of somewhere safer. She then turned away and ran after pressing the launch button. "PYRRHA!" He cried as he lifted into the air.
"HRRGH!" She turned and saw a burly man taking hold of the locker, risking his arms of burning from the launch jets. "JAUNE! CURL!" He roared over the engines, then stepped away as he pulled it down, closer to him. Once he pulled it down, he let go and allowed it to crash to the tower. More debris then fell atop it, sealing the locker under rubble of solid stone.
"JAUNE!" Pyrrha screamed, running to the pile of rocks covering her lover. As she removed the first stone, the locker was pulled free from the stone prison. Jaune's grandfather then ripped open the metal door.
"Grandpa?" Jaune looked to the towering man. Or, well, towering from where he lay.
"Can you stand?" His grandfather asked.
"Yeah." He then pulled himself free from the metal near-casket. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to help you."
"Oh, uh..." Jaune looked over to Pyrrha, he saw her run for the door. "Wait, Pyrrha, no!"
Before she could enter, an axe soared through the air, lodging itself inside the elevator. Pyrrha ducked and stayed low to the floor, looking up to find the blue blade humming above her. She looked behind her, finding Jaune and his grandfather approaching her. The older of the two lifted his hand, and his axe returned to his hand.
"Why did you attack my grandson?" He asked, a rumble of rage in his voice.
"I- I didn't!" Pyrrha replied.
"You sought to trap him inside the locker." He reasoned. "Why?"
"He..." She gulped. "I have to face my destiny."
"You would seek your death alone?"
"I have to do this!"
"Not without me!" Jaune argued. "We're partners, Pyrrha!"
"No, I..." Pyrrha swallowed. "I can't risk losing you, Jaune!"
"Then you would risk him losing you. You would risk being selfish."
"No, that's not-"
"Ozpin is dead, Pyrrha!" Jaune argued,
"And you believe you would succeed where he failed?" The burly elder summarized. The Grimm above roared again, drawing attention to the trio. "Against that?"
Pyrrha wanted to cry. She had been selfish. In her haste to meet her destiny, she had forgotten how powerful she truly was, with half of her life drained by the machine below the tower. She'd forgotten how much more powerful her enemy truly was.
"I will destroy the Grimm." The bearded man said. "You may assist."
"But-" Pyrrha felt a hand on her shoulder. Following the arm, she found Jaune looking at her with a determined face, those same beautiful eyes filled with tears.
----------------------------------------------
"Your grace..." Salem did little more than tilt her head as her pawn, Cinder Fall, returned. Even looking away, she could hear her ragged breaths and the dripping of blood on the floor near the Seer. "We... We failed."
"You failed?" Salem asked. "And pray tell, how did you fail to destroy Beacon?"
"I..." There was a pause, followed by softer breathing. She'd passed out.
"There was a man." Cinder's pawn, Emerald, answered in her place. "Someone we didn't account for."
"A mere man stopped you?" Salem asked. She then turned, her piercing red eyes narrowed. She was fully aware of what killed her Wyvern, and even moreso aware of his history. "Or was it a Ghost?"
#rwby#god of war#kratos#jaune arc#saphron cotta arc#papa arc#cinder fall#arkos#pyrrha nikos#salem#emerald sustrai
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Can I request something where Steve has to do cpr on the reader?
spoilers from vol.2 below!
warnings: near death experience, angst, ends in happy ending
w/c: 0.7k
steve harrington x fem!henderson!reader
steve didn't know how it really happened.
at the moment, everything that had happened minutes prior was kind of a blur, as he stared at your limp body under him.
"c'mon, henderson," he locked his hands, putting them on your chest and pressing one, two, three, four times.
vecna had gotten a good grip on you. one of his disgusting, reddish vines wrapping around your throat until your breathing had stuttered and your eyes had rolled to the back, and then he finally loosened the limb and let your unconscious body fall to the floor.
steve didn't know how he let it happened. maybe he was too busy helping robin get away from vecna's grip on her for him to noticed you had been taken, too.
but he was too afraid to admit that he was the one at fault. the reason why your eyes were closed, keeping him from looking into your gorgeous eyes; the ones he had seen with crinkles by them when he had made you laugh so hard you almost fell to the floor just a few hours ago.
nancy had screamed his name when she saw you falling to the floor, pointing to your body. it was then when steve's eyes widened, muttering a 'shit' under his breath, curses evolving as he sprinted towards you.
and there's where he was now, in a corner of victor creed's house, desperately trying to pump your heart to make it beat again.
"shit, shit, fuck. no, shit, no," he had said, every word louder and louder as he approached you. he quickly scanned the surroundings for any dangers in sight, quickly deciding to lift you up and carry you to safety.
steve muttered the words under his breath in sync with his movements. "one, two, three..." and then he lowered his face to your chest, putting his ear by your heart in hopes of hearing the heavenly sound again. he shook his head, biting his lips when his eyes began to sting in frustration, repeating his motions.
this time he lowered his ear to your mouth, trying to listen to any sign of breathing. steve clenched his eyes shut when he wasn't able to hear anything over the sound of the chaos around him, swearing once more.
"c'mon, angel, you can't leave now," he whispered. "remember our talk earlier? no backing out, now. you promised," he said sterly, pursing his lips in concentration and pressing on your chest faster.
your lips were turning paler, bluer with each passing second, and steve could feel his stomach drop at the realization. he shook his head violently, pressing his lips to yours and breathing into your mouth, trying to get the air to your lungs.
he backed away, looking at you for a second for any kind of reaction. when he didn't get any, he started again. "fuck, henderson. c'mon sweetheart. you're not dying on me. you're not leaving us like that, come on."
he put his mouth back on yours, trying once again with the mouth-to-mouth. when he pulled apart and noticed that you weren't responding, his shoulders slumped. his lips were parted, his eyes lingering on your body, and how your chest wasn't moving up and down anymore.
steve had heard your heartbeat the other night, when he laid on your chest. at that moment, he hadn't noticed just how beautiful the sound was. it was rhythmical, calming and it lulled him to sleep.
now, as he saw your chest still and your body limp, the realization of not hearing your heartbeat never again made him want to throw up.
that was, until your eyes shot opened, a loud gasp falling from your lips as you sat up in a rush.
"shit!" steve said, gathering you in his arms and keeping you close, feeling rocking you back and forth in his lap to try and help your shaking form calm down.
he could feel your body beginning to warm up again, and the relief that went through his body made a sob escape his mouth, as he sloppily pressed kisses to every inch of you he had in sight.
no words were shared, only shaky cries and you, on his lap, alive.
#steve harrington angst#steve harrington#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington smut#steve harrington fluff#stranger things 4#stranger things s4#steve stranger things#stranger things
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Jealously Often leads to trouble.
@themortalbooklibrary Sorry it took so long! But here you go!
You sit in the Osborn’s lab hiding your tears. You don’t want Harry to see you crying silently, thinking you were losing hope for him. You need to be his rock right now. He’s getting worse by the day. What are you going to do? You try desperately to put the thought of him dying out of your head. At the rate things are going…no you can’t think like that.
“Y/N?” You look up to meet the eyes of Peter and quickly try to wipe the tears away from your face. Peter quickly made his way over to where you were sitting and knelt down. “Is it Harry?” He whispers to which you nod.
“What are we going to do Pete?” You ask in a broken voice. “He’s dying and nothing is working. I just don’t understand how…why his treatment just stopped working.” You let you a sob and Peter handed you tissues. You gladly take them and continue wiping the tears from your flushed cheeks.
“We’ll figure something out. Everything's gonna be-”
“Please don’t promise that.” You interrupt. “Don’t tell me it’s all going to work out. Please don’t Pete cause I won't be able to believe you ever again if it doesn't!” You say covering your eyes fighting the sobs again. Peter quickly pulled you into a hug.
“It’ll be OK. Alright? We’ll figure this out somehow, I know it.” You wrapped your arms around Peter’s waist as he pulled you up from your sitting position. He pulled back and put his hands on your cheeks, wiping away the tears with his thumbs. “We’ll figure it out, OK? Harry will be fine. I'll make sure of it.” He said, pulling you into a hug again. Little did you know Harry had heard and seen only half of the conversation. It sounded to him that Pete was going to “take care” of him so he could have you all to himself. Is that why Pete was acting this way? Angrily, he hobbled away, tears welled up in his eyes. No way is Pete taking you from him. He can have everything else, his father, his suit and whatever else but you? No way. He’ll prove to you that he’s the better man and always has been.
* * *
“Somethings wrong with Harry!” Pete yelled over the phone. Panic spreads throughout your body.
“OK I’m heading to his house now!” You said grabbing your bag.
“No! You can’t! He’s not right! Don’t go near him! Stay away!” You scoffed.
“Really Pete? No, I'm going to see him.” You said. “You haven’t really been around for weeks and now you think you know what’s going on with him?” You snarled.
“Please. You have to listen to me. I’m trying to protect you!” Pete said as you opened your door to see…Harry. Who’s eyes were burning through your own. You smiled when you saw him and couldn’t help but hug him forgetting his balance wasn’t good anymore but he didn’t even stumble.
“Harry,” You sighed, letting go. “Pete said something bad happened to you.”
“Y/N? Is he there?” Shit. You forgot Pete had called you. You were about to answer when Harry grabbed your phone and ended the call then chuckled darkly.
“I bet Pete wishes something bad happened to me. Then he’d have you all to himself again.” Your brow furrowed.
“What? No he’s been running all over the place trying to find Dr. Connors, so you can get your healing suit back. Yeah, he's been a dick about it, but...” Harry’s eye grew darker as he advanced forward into your house.
“He didn’t want to give it back to me. He was going to let me die!” Harry said, pinning you between himself and a wall. His hands laid flat on a wall next to both sides of your face. Your words were failing you. Would Peter really do that? Would Harry lie about that? “But I took it back.” Harry said as his eyes turned pitch black as he transformed into a huge monstrous thing with massive teeth and a large tongue. You should have screamed, fought, ran something! But you didn’t. It’s like your head knew it was Harry so whatever this was is still a part of him therefore, it’s a very slim chance that he’ll hurt you like this. “We are better than him.” Your jaw dropped as the monster spoke. “We will prove it to you.” You swallow dryly as a hand reaches for you. Reacting, you flinched slightly and closed your eyes hoping whatever Harry was going to, he’d do it quickly. “Are you scared?”
“No. Just uncertain.” You say your eyes are still closed.
“We are not going to hurt you. We just want you to see that you belong with us and not him.” You open your eyes.
“Him as in Pete?” The Creature growled.
“Yes. Him” This time you leaned off the wall and walked closer to The Creature.
“Harry, do you think I… love Pete?” you ask.
“We are not-.”
“I’m not talking to you.” You say in a stern way. “I’m talking to Harry.” You put your hand where his heart should be and The Creature gave him back to you. Harry was still acting differently but all you wanted was answers. “Harry,” you started again, “do you think I love Pete?” Harry’s eyes were still dark and he didn’t answer at first.
“I saw you.” He growled. “He was hugging you when you were crying. He’s always taking everything from me and now he wants you.” His jaw clenched. You take your hand and raise it to Harry’s face. He grabs it out as if he expects you to hurt him but once seeing the look in your eyes, brings your hand to his face.
“Pete’s a friend, Harry.” You whisper. “He caught me crying. Something I didn’t want you to see. I didn’t want you to think I was giving up hope.” Finally, Harry’s eyes softened. He pulled back releasing you from being trapped between him and the wall.
“I didn’t know.” You smile and open your mouth to say something until the door to my apartment swings open. I turned to see Pete in a Spider-man costume. My mouth dropped. You were about to start a butt load of questions when Pete pulled me away from Harry. You resist.
“Pete stop! This isn’t-” You start when you see Harry grab Pete’s arm on mine and effortlessly through it off. You turn to Harry who had inky black veins surrounding him. Oh no. The Creature is going to come out if he gets too upset.
“Do not touch her.” Harry said as a warning to Pete while still looking at you.
“We gotta get that thing off of you.” Pete shouts. Harry’s eyes turn black.
“We are not a thing!” You reached for Harry thinking you could calm him again until you felt yourself being thrown back. Your head bounces off a nearby door as you hit the floor. You felt something trickle down your forehead. Through blurry vision you saw Harry throw Pete off to the side knocking him out. The Creature turns its attention to you. You struggle to get up, limbs feeling like lead. “Do not worry.” It said kneeling down beside you. “We will take care of you.” You felt the Creature pick you up carefully as if you were made of glass. “Nothing will hurt you again.” It said turning back into Harry. “It’s just a small cut.” He reassures as if he didn’t just throw his best friend across the room. “You’ll be OK. Just rest. I’ll take care of everything.” Harry says as your vision fades to black.
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