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nonbinarydeity · 1 year

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Simplifying Manifestation/Shifting

Disclaimer: I don't mind if this isn't how you want to manifest. It's okay to have rules that make it work a certain way for you, it's okay to do things your own way. This is just how I understand manifesting now, and if it doesn't resonate with you, that's fine 🥰

So okay, I've been reading a couple of things from an amino user and I've realized so much more deeply what reality is and how to manifest and just everything. Please please please go read those posts because they explain it really well and I'm not an expert on this (yet!!).

Also I'm going to be focusing on my journey and I'm gonna be deleting the Tumblr app because there are WAY too many limiting beliefs on here. I'll do my best to answer questions about this today and tomorrow, then I'm offline for a while 🥰

The 4D and the 3D

So how I understand it now is different from what a lot of the community believes, but I swear that understanding this makes everything so much more simple and stress free.

The 3D is a reflection of your subconscious mind, which exists on the 4D plane. The biggest thing that people get wrong here is that the subconscious mind needs to be "programmed" a certain way. In reality, the subconscious mind is incredibly smart. It knows more about you and your desires than you do tbh. It's like your best friend, it's always trying to get you what you want, and it follows the rules you give it (more on this in a sec).

All you have to do to manifest/ shift is tell your subconscious mind what you want. That's literally it. You can even just say "I want xyz" and forget about it, and you'll get it.

When you ask for something, the 4D receives it and implements it right away. It gives the signal to the 3D to change, and the 3D does. Sometimes it takes a little while for the 3D to change all the way, but that's okay and normal! All you have to do is just wait and know that it's coming, you don't have to worry about doing anything else.

Rules

So the only thing that can get in the way of your manifestation/ shift is you. See, your subconscious mind follows every rule you give it, and humans have a tendency to put a LOT of rules on things, because that's what we're taught to do.

Say you're manifesting something, and it doesn't show up right away (because the 3D needs a little more time). You, being human, take that as a sign that it's not coming at all, and start assuming that something is wrong, or that you're doing something wrong, and you start putting all these rules in place trying to find an answer (think: I have to affirm more, I have to be in the wish fulfilled more, etc). Your subconscious then takes those rules you gave yourself and implements them, and suddenly it's taking longer to get what you want! This triggers a cycle of this (ask for what you want > don't get it right away > look for reasons why > make more rules/ change your rules > repeat) that can last for an infinite amount of time, until you're exhausted and give up entirely!

The key

From this, I hope you understand what you have to do. Literally, throw out your old mindset entirely and stick to these simple rules:

Ask and you shall receive. (Ask in this term could mean affirm, visualize, command your subconscious, etc)

Be patient. It might take some time but it IS coming to you!

Don't give up or accept that you'll never get it. The 3D could be seconds away from giving you what you want!

Most importantly: don't make a ton of rules for yourself!! Enjoy yourself, enjoy your time, be okay with the 3D for a little while because it IS changing in your favor. Don't force yourself to think about it 24/7, don't make yourself affirm every second of the day, etc!! All of that stuff is pointless! It won't get it to you any faster, if anything it'll make you doubt and spiral, which will lead to that cycle of self sabotage again. Just relax and let it happen 💕

And that's literally it!! Don't overcomplicate this, it's so important that you just relax and let it be for a little while.

I tried this during our walk today, and I had 4/4 successful manifestations (see a yellow car, see a green car, get paczki flavors I wanted [the ordering period was over, but I got the flavors I wanted anyways!!], find money [I started overthinking this, but I reminded myself that it was done, and we found it under a trash can of all things lol]) within my specific parameters (within our 30 minute walk to the store)! Literally all I did was say that's what I wanted and trusted my subconscious to give it to me, nothing else.

Outro

In the end, manifestation is not your job to do. Your job as a human being is literally just to enjoy life and ask for what you want. Everything else is your subconscious' job, and you don't have to worry about it beyond that!

Give yourself time and forgive yourself for overcomplicating it, because everyone does and that's normal and okay. We're human. We overthink. We overcomplicate. That's just what we do, and that's okay 🥰

I'm going to be answering asks about this post specifically for the rest of today and tomorrow, and then I'm going to be deleting the Tumblr app and focusing on my journey. I'll likely be posting again for updates and explanations of this once I understand it more deeply, but for now this is all you need to know!

#master manifestor #law of assumption #manifestation #manifesting #manifest #law of attraction #living in the end #self concept affirmations #loa #loassumption #shifting #reality shift #reality shifting

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not-terezi-pyrope · 4 months

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I forget sometimes because I have my own friends and tumblr bubble where people are more reasonable, but yesterday I made the mistake of going on twitter and its algorithm noticed I had an interest in AI, and, man it's bleak out there.

I'm actually fairly despondent about the way that AI has firmly and probably irreversibly been cast as an ontological evil being inflicted on society. I hate that the industry I've studied to enter, that I truly believe can do a lot of good, is going to get me socially blacklisted in a lot of contexts.

I have got into fights with my own family over this. The other night I was out at an LGBT social meet and a couple of people there were illustrators or in media and the whole time I was like, "please don't ask me what I studied".

It's so grim. I could never have predicted this in 2018. I just want to build useful intelligent systems, reduce human labour burden, and explore the potential of cognitive computing for creative expression (no, not "AI art", at the end of the day I don't really give too much of a shit about that as a specific application. But building an agent that can express itself is the purest form of artistic creation there is).

Fuck society for not even giving us a chance to get this right before starting in on shutting it all down. Most people didn't even try to engage with deploying AI systems and cognitive automation maximally ethical ways, weren't even paying attention while those discussions were first happening, and now the people researching core capabilities the bad guys while y'all happily work to keep the rat race running in place where it was circa 1999.

(Fucking grey as hell future people online seem to want. Nothing revolutionary about doing nothing for decades and saying "wouldn't it be nice if things were different, but of course we can't actually risk trying to change them". Capitalist realism is a black hole for hope tbh.)

#not-terezi-speaks #my life #ai

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belleame333 · 1 year

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how i overcame my phone addiction.

so for some background, i used to have a screen time of about 8 hours daily. i used my phone all day, every day, obsessively scrolling through tiktok and other social media apps. this did a significant number on my mental health and social life, and when i decided i wanted to work on myself i knew that this was the thing i needed to change first. so here's what i did to bring it down to less than one hour a day (some of the advice i took is from faye bate on youtube, go check out her video on the topic!)

turned off my app limit: this may seem counterproductive, but whenever i had my app limit on i would just press 5 more minutes until the next pop-up came and i would just press ignore and continue scrolling. i realized that it just didn't do anything.

deleted ALL games and social media: yes, even tumblr, and now i only have it on my laptop. i know many have FOMO (fear of missing out), and i did too, that is what keeps pulling us back to all these social media apps. no, it won't kill you if you do not see your friend's insta story or what your favorite tiktoker wore that day. trust me, it was hard to delete it all, especially since it gave me that feeling of being connected, but i just did it. that's what you need to remember in this whole journey: to just do it, even if you don't want to at first, you will not regret it. we see so much of other people's lives on social media that we forget about our own, that's why i cut my screen time so much, i wasn't focusing on myself and my own life.

put my phone far away/turn it off: whenever i leave a room i leave my phone in there, i put it up somewhere out of reach or i just turn it off completely, easy as that. also, when i go to school, i leave my phone at home sometimes so i don't go on it during class.

stopped listening to music: this was probably the hardest thing to do because i used to listen to music 24/7 but that fucked my brain up too since i just couldn't sit in silence without thinking about putting on music, and if i put on music, i also wanted to scroll through my phone. this also helped me to calm my mind a bit, because before i was constantly just singing in my head.

found other hobbies: i now do yoga, meditate, work out, read and solve puzzles; not long ago these were all things i didn't do because i was always on my phone. you don't even need a new hobby necessarily, you just need to do other stuff to get your mind off your phone, preferably something productive that's good for you.

did a dopamine detox: this is what i recommend most tbh. i found simonesquared’s videos on the topic to be the best and i followed what she did. i suggest you do your research into it but basically, it's not interacting with anything that gives us a dopamine kick (our phones, music, etc.) for a full day. i do this regularly now and it's been a great help with getting me away from my phone.

i truly hope someone found this helpful, love u xx

#self improvement #self care #that girl #clean girl #pink pilates princess #leveling up #level up journey #level up tips #feminine energy #divine feminine #dark feminine energy #self help #wellness #health and wellness #self healing #vanilla girl #my post

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subtle-as-an-earthquake · 7 months

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phew, ok gonna just ramble for a minute! for the last couple of days i've been getting so caught up in my milex feelings and the letdown after the anticipation that i almost forgot to be properly excited for this trip 🙈 but now that i'm actually in dublin, after listening to arctic monkeys and miles tunes on the flight and getting hyped about seeing my one of my best irl friends from london again for the first time since june, it's much easier for me to put things in perspective, thank goodness!! i'd have kicked myself later if i spent my time here moping (which i've kind of been doing these past two days) instead of being excited about getting to see my all time favourite band play again (twice!!) AND with miles as well, and just have a fun trip with my friends in dublin (even though it'll be raining cats and dogs, but we'll be in the pub most of the time anyway 🍻)

after the london gig in june i really thought that was it for a couple of years, so to have been given this extra opportunity to see them again so soon is insane and an absolute blessing. i'm SO fucking excited, i can't even tell you 😭 these will be my 8th and 9th arctic monkeys gigs to date, and i'm still just as hyped as i was 10 years ago, and i think that's worth reflecting on for a minute ❤️

i'm putting some more musings about the milex situation under the cut for anyone who might be interested in a different perspective, but mostly it's just for me, to be able to untangle the mess that my mind has been in these past few days. also, please know that i'm definitely not trying to invalidate anyone's concerns or diminish anyone's feelings, because lord knows i've been feeling all the things the past few days and all those feelings are very (very) real!

i guess what i just keep coming back to is the fact that arctic monkeys (or alex, really, lbr) asked miles to be the support for these four dates when they absolutely didn't have to do that, and that if there was any bad blood between them then they totally could've asked anyone else. but they didn't, they asked miles! and miles agreed! it's much more likely that the fact that they're not playing together is due to logistics (with the orchestra and limited rehearsal time) and wanting to highlight miles's new album than any personal reasons tbh. they're professionals doing their jobs first and foremost, and while obviously we'd love a display of sentimentality, if that doesn't fit the show for whatever reason then it makes sense they don't give us that. i'm sure it's all been discussed and agreed on between them, and that they're doing perfectly fine behind the scenes. it's true that miles shows us a lot of himself, but alex and the other boys do not, so it also makes sense to me that what miles shares about them/their interactions with him is limited too, much as i'd love to see him gush about them and post bts footage. i always find that i get easily swept up in emotions and conjecture when i'm watching things unfold from a distance, through the tumblr/fandom lens, but i forget sometimes that that is a heavily coloured lens, and that real life is often very different, despite what social media etc. may seem to show. and for me personally, i've noticed that sometimes it's really good to break out of the bubble for a bit and see things from a different perspective, so i'm glad i was able to do that before my shows!

also, on a side note, i've seen some people being disappointed that alex didn't dedicate bodypaint to miles but just gave him a shoutout, but to me the distinction doesn't matter too much. he mentioned miles when he didn't have to, and miles stayed to watch the boys do their thing after his own set, and he didn't have to do that either if he wasn't feeling it. the fact is that recently there have been more and more signs that our boys are actually growing closer again than they seemingly have been for a few years, and while obviously i just want them to give us everything and announce a tlsp reunion and also profess their undying love for each other while they're at it, maybe their doing what they can right now, and they just need a bit more time to get to where they once were. we all need time to heal, or something like that, anyway. i obviously don't know anything, but this possiblity seems just as if not more likely to me than the other option (which would be that any of this is a sign they're growing further apart, instead), so i'm good with that for the moment.

anyway, this is just me talking to myself on the plane and creating some perspective for myself, but maybe someone else might find it helpful too, who knows. in any case, i'm going to do my best to enjoy it all to the fullest!! and while obviously getting to see them do something together would be brilliant, it would just be the cherry on an otherwise already really fucking delicious cake ❤️

#i know nobody probably cares about my ramblings but it felt good to get it out ❤️#arctic monkeys #alex turner #miles kane #milex #minnie talks

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sinon36 · 25 days

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Echoes of Salvation: The Deal (Part I). Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x afab reader (Zombie AU)

Part II

The story starts after the dash.

Warnings: some gore, some mistakes, some bad writing (eh… we all have to start somewhere), not proof read, some independent woman surviving on her own without the need of help from men (cause I like self reliant women and people in general, they are a great inspiration to us all, really).

Disclaimer:

Dear readers,

Please be kind. This is my first fanfiction ever that I wrote and posted, so please be kind and overlook any potential inaccuracies, mistakes, grammatical errors as I’m not a professional writer and also English isn’t my native tongue. Though I have studied British English I am sure I haven’t really managed to accurately portray the British way of speaking, so please, feel free to point out anything that might poke you in the eye while reading this.

Also, I would like to tell you that this fan-fic is the love child of my obsession with our favourite masked man Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley, and my love for anything zombie apocalypse or world-ending alternate universe or actual universe. Tbh If I wasn’t a poor student I would probably be a prepper, just like Frank from HBO’s TLoU. Most likely will be. I’m a little weird like that, you’ll see more in the future.

To close this little rant, I hope you’ll enjoy it, even if it’s short, I would really like to continue this if you deem it worth it enough. This will probably be a slow-burn kind of romance: 1. because I’m a sucker for the kind of slow-burn strangers/enemies to lovers fanfics, and 2. because it’s more realistic, let’s calm the whore-y instincts and be reasonable people that don’t climb masked 6-feet-tall strangers like trees.

With everything said I do not own the Call of Duty character Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley (*whispers*Though I wish I did*) BUT I do own this piece of fanfic. Please don’t steal it. Repost it but please do give credit to other people’s work. You may notice some similarities to other fanfics, cause duh, I also read a lot of that, (isn’t that one of the incipient stages to becoming a fanfic writer?), but I would really like to give a shout out to the fanfic author that really inspired me to put fingers to keyboard and a fanfic into Tumblr, please, *drum rolls* a round of applause for @nsharks with her lovely fanfic ‘Bleeding Blue’. She’s really wonderful and you should really check her out.

Have fun reading and don’t forget to leave a comment or a heart. I wouldn’t mind suggestions of what to name Simons’ daughter. That would really make my day 😊

P.S. Sorry to all the fishing loving people out there, what I said was based on my impression of the fishing experience and should be taken with a grain of salt.

Yours truly <3

Synopsis:

It’s been five years since the outbreak happened. Five years ago, in London, a terrorist group released a virus in the city center. 24 hours later, people start developing flu-like symptoms. 48 hours later the infected turn into mindless ghouls biting healthy people and spreading the infection. Everything happened so fast. The army came in and tried to contain the outbreak but soon chaos engulfed the whole country. You learn that similar attacks happened all over the world: New York, Beijing, Moscow, Athens, and Tokyo. City by city, the whole world is ending.

You survived thanks to your mid-twenties life crisis that made you move into a cottage house by the lake in Lake District. The land you own is surrounded by thick lush forest that offers perfect cover for the tiny brick house that is your safe haven. With a water source close, off-the-grid energy, and a garden full of plants, fruit trees chickens, and whatnot, you live a comfortable life tucked away, far from the dangers of the cities. You are so far out of reach that in the past years you only saw a handful of infected, survivors that traveled far to escape and distant neighbours that got infected in the towns nearby. You can’t remember the last time you saw another person. But you are used to your loneliness. The end of the world brought only a mild inconvenience, now that you can no longer order things online and watch movies on Netflix or HBO. But with a library full of books, a homestead to keep you active and your Border Collie companion, Bellamy, life is good. Life is peaceful.

One day, while you are out fishing, a masked man, armed to the teeth and carrying a young girl in his arms threatens to kill you if you don’t provide him with medicine for his sick daughter.

The sky is cloudy above but some sunbeams break through to warm the crisp air this fine early spring morning. It’s a good time for fishing now that the water is warmer, they come closer to the bank in search of food. It’s a boring task after you arrange all your tools and launch the line in the water. It’s a game of waiting and watching for any small tugs or movement of the neon-coloured fishing line. You picked up fishing after a couple of months into moving here, when everything was a mess and so many repairs and renovations had to be made around the house. The guy from the tutorials you used to watch on YouTube talked about the calmness and relaxation fishing brought to him. Maybe you weren’t cut out to stand all day on shore and gawk like an idiot for hours at the thin plastic line submerged in the lake water. But you cannot deny the proud feeling catching a fish brought to you when the line finally went taught.

You try and ward off the boredom and instead try to focus on the warmth that spring brings after months of endless cold. The birds are singing in trees, preparing nests for future offspring, and the lake is calm, with bubbles on the surface indicating the abundance of fish. Life is good. Bellamy enjoys sunbathing next to you rolling in a patch of grass. Everything is peaceful. Nothing really happens here anyway. You close your eyes basking in the good feeling that overtakes you.

A branch snapping behind you wakes you from the meditation you have fallen into. You raise and turn from where you are crouched over your equipment. You come face to face with a strange figure.

‘Show me yer hands’ he tells you in a thick British accent, eyes focused on you and handgun aimed at your chest. He wears all black and a haunting white skull mask. He is tall, at least 6 feet tall, body poised to kill. In his other arm, you can see a little girl hugging his neck.

You slowly raise your hands. At your foot, Bellamy growls baring her teeth at the stranger sensing danger. You shush her grabbing her by the caller to keep her from attacking the armed man. You stand still watching in apprehension as the man studies you. You look at the ground where you left your backpack and your hatchet.

‘Don’t even think about it’ comes the gruff order. You nod trying to convey that you understand the situation. ‘There’s nothing in that bag worth a bullet’ you tell him in an even tone despite fear creeping down your spine. He hums in agreement. ‘And if you wanted to kill me you would’ve done it by now.’ He watches you like a hawk its prey. ‘So…’ you pause carefully measuring your words, ‘what it is that you want from me?’ he gestures you to take a few steps back and you drag Bellamy by her collar.

He kicks at the backpack spilling the contents. A bottle of water and a half-eaten sandwich, a hunting knife, and a rectangular box in which you keep the hooks, lures, fishing lines, and other small fishing equipment. He turns his gaze back at you and nods toward your dog. ‘Put a muzzle on it or I’ll shoot it’. your blood runs cold at the thought of losing your sole companion. You scramble to untie the scarf you keep tied around your wrist that you use to wipe away sweat from your forehead. You wrap the piece of cloth around the dog’s snout tight enough to not slip away. Next, the dark-clad man tells you to pack your fishing gear and collect your backpack, with one hand keeping it outstretched to the side and the other one grabbing at Bellamy’s collar guiding her forward. ‘Move. Eyes forward. Any sudden moves and I drop you.’

He walks a couple paces behind you. For how big he is you can barely hear him walk on the path. You can feel his gaze burning in the back of your head and the gun pointed at your back. As you start down the path you can make out the roof of your small house. Once you get at the gate you stop. ‘open it’ he instructs. ‘The key is in my right pocket’ you say slowly gesturing to said pocket. ‘Mhm,’ you hear him grunt. You slowly release Bellamy and fish for the key in your jacket’s pocket. You slowly take it out and put it in the keyhole turning it and opening the gate.

The familiar sight of your front garden does nothing to appease you in this situation. Bushes full of colourful flowers hug the narrow path toward the house. The wind catcher hung above your porch clinks melodically as a gust of warm wind catches on it. you take a few more steps on the stone path before you and you hear the gate closing behind you. What once was your safe space now traps you in with a stranger ready to shoot you or worse.

‘Tie the dog to that pole’ he orders you again. On your right, there is a small pole stuck in the ground. He throws a roll of paracord next to you. You don’t move at first. You had never tied Bellamy down before. You can’t even remember when you last put a leash on her. She likes to roam free and run around. The click of the gun behind you tells you that you have no choice. You drop the backpack and start to drag her to the pole. She tries to resist but you shush her and urge her to move. Once you finish tying her you turn towards the stranger. He nods towards the house and you start walking hands raised on either side of your head. Once you open the door he urges you inside.

‘Where do you keep the medicine?’ he grumbles urgently. ’Bathroom.’ you nod to the right of your living room. ‘Go get it!’ you don’t wait around you spring toward the white door. After a couple of minutes grabbing most of what you keep in the over-sink cabinet you emerge hands filled with gauze of all sizes and different bottled pills. You return to find the man placing the girl on the couch. She appears to be asleep. You almost forgot about her. She looks about 8-years-old. Brown hair is chopped short in a pixie cut. She’s wearing blue-washed jeans and a dark green hoodie that’s too big on her.

You watch as he peels the hoodie from her limp body. Underneath she wears a striped t-shirt, but what catches your attention is her left upper arm. Red stained gauze is wrapped around. You are still in your approach keeping a safe distance. ‘Was she bit?’ the words rush out in apprehension. From where he kneels next to her his eyes snap at you. ‘No’ he denies the implication of your words. ‘Put that on the table and go sit by the door’ You do as you're told eyes darting between the girl and the man. You drop everything on the coffee table and go sit by the entrance door hugging your knees. You watch as he works on bandaging the kid. Your eyes are glued to the girl’s arm.

Even though you lived so far out into the wilderness you saw pictures on the internet of bites from the infected. You read the posts of the survivors and heard the news broadcast on all channels. Then everything went quiet. The cable didn’t work and your phone had no signal. You knew shit hit the fan and that it was serious. Then, a few weeks later you saw your closest neighbour, Neil, an elderly farmer who lived about half a mile further up the river’s bank, growling and stumbling trying to catch Bellamy who was running scared towards you. You tried to talk him out of the trance-like state but to no avail. He kept stalking towards you, ready to take a bite out of you. You tried to tell him to keep his distance and warned him that you would protect yourself. The rest was a blur. You faintly remember grabbing the hatchet that you used to cut down logs for your stove. And then the struggle with the man, Bellamy barking, you crying out pleas for him to stop. In the cacophony of noises, you hit him with the blade right in the neck. The next thing you knew, your neighbour lay in a pool of dark blood hatchet still. It took you a while to register what you have done. You just killed a man. You couldn’t forget the way he lay there, on the gravel, hands stretched outwards bloodshot eyes staring emptily at the sky. That was the first time you encountered an infected. You distinctly remember the fear and adrenaline that took hold of you. The feelings that gripped your heart so tight and that made you take a life take over you as you watch the little girl, possibly infected, unconscious but on her way to the same madness that turned Neil into a savage monster all those years ago.

'She's feverish. You got meds or something to bring the fever down?' his question brings down from your rising panic at the thought of being stuck inside with a possible infected. ‘There should be some anti-inflammatory pills and some antibiotics. They are out of date but they could still work.' He grabs hold of the med kit you brought. He sorts through the drugs checking the expiration dates. When he comes across the antibiotics, he studies the pack carefully, his eyes darting back and forth from the label to the girl. 'How much can I give her?' he asks with a hint of concern his stern facade crumbling slightly.

You look at him unsure what to say. Those pills have been bought before the start of the outbreak. You doubt expired drugs have any effect anymore. You refrain from saying that though. He is stressed, he might take his anger on you. ‘She’s a kid, you mumble, so, about half of each.’ He carefully considers his next action. ‘She’ll need water to take them, you add from down the floor. And some food…’ He nods in understanding. ‘May I?’ you don’t know why you offer this stranger help. First, he disturbs you from catching dinner, next, he threatens to kill you and your dog, now he takes over your house and medicine. But you can recognize the desperation in his look, the way he fumbles with the packaging. He is a parent trying to save his kid. Even though you don’t have any of your own you recognize the parental instincts, the same ones you exert on Bellamy.

He looks at you unsure of what to do. He surrenders in defeat and nods at you to go on. You rise to your full height, which doesn’t add up to much compared to him. You walk past them all the way to the back of the living room where you disappear behind a white door. After a couple minutes, you reemerge from the kitchen with a glass of water in one hand and a bowl of steaming vegetable soup you made this morning. You slowly approach the couch watching him for any sign that you might cross a line. Instead of any aggression he takes a step back and allows you to go closer to the girl. You place the bowl and the glass on the coffee table and kneel next to the couch.

The girl opens her eyes and looks at you with distrust. Like father like daughter… you think to yourself. But you try to smile at her try to reassure her. ‘I brought you some soup, love’ you say in your most sincere and kind voice. ‘You must eat a little and then take some pills that will make you feel better’. You try to persuade her. She stares at you for a minute then at the man. They are suspicious of you and they have all the reason to be. You are a stranger to them as much as they are to you. Funny you are in the position to try and win their trust in your own home. You take the spoon you brought for her and dip it in the bowl. You take a spoonful and hover it close to your face blowing a little over it and then you swallow it. You can’t help the little moan of appreciation for your own cooking skills. ‘See? It’s good.’ You look at her with a small smile.

You don’t know where this came from; you blame it on the 6-foot-tall armored stranger whose stare drives daggers at the back of your head and your desire to keep your head on your shoulders and all your blood in your body. You don’t outright hate kids but you were never good around them. With a sigh, she sits upright and takes the spoon from you. She eats slowly. You keep watching her. She is a pretty kid. She has blue eyes and freckles on her small button nose. You wonder if she looks anything like the man behind you. She is pale and sweat collects on her little forehead most likely from her fever. She eats half of the soup you brought her and then turns her gaze towards the man. He hands her the two halves of the pills. She takes them in her small hand and grabs the glass. She hesitates. ‘It’s okay’ you reassure her and with a nod, she puts the half tablets on her tongue following up with large gulps from the glass. She scrunches her little nose in disgust at the chalky taste. ‘Atta girl’ you hear him utter from behind you. ‘Now lay down and rest.' he says to the girl in a stern yet gentle voice. He watches her nod and lie back on the couch her eyes half-lidded. He sighs, 'Good for now. ' he mutters under his breath. His eyes are fixed on her as he gestures to you. 'Come with me.' You rise from the floor and follow him outside the front door.

He leads you outside. When you cross the threshold, he takes a deep breath and a look of relief washes over his stern features. He gestures for you to sit on the front porch with him. 'We need to talk...' 'Yeah' you say crossing your arms defensively over your chest and standing as far away as the length of your porch allows. you take a moment to study him as he fixes you with a cold stare. You notice the many pockets on his vest and belt. A patch on his chest reads S.A.S. He's ex-military, you muse. His uniform makes much more sense now. But the mask still unnerves you.

He leans against one of the wooden porch support beams right hand hovering on the pistol holster. You think it's an act to intimidate you, to remind you that he is still armed and ready to strike you down in your own home. You stare at him a little defiantly. You’ll be damned before you let this weirdo intimidate you on your turf. He studies you from head to boots and back up. You sigh and square your shoulders showing him you are not afraid of him. ‘I’ve been watching you.’ He tells you in a matter-of-fact tone. You try to suppress the surprise on your face. You look down at his boots avoiding his icy gaze.

He’s been stalking you, and the realization dawns on you. You didn’t even notice his presence around the house. Stupid, you think to yourself, I’m growing complacent. But not even Bellamy caught his smell and she usually barks when someone or something comes close to the house. But earlier at the lake, he took you both by surprise. He’s good at keeping his presence concealed, you have to give it to him. You nod to yourself in understanding. He probably knows the layout of your house by now, he knows you are alone, and he waited for you to be outside and ambush you. You start imagining all the horrible things he could have done to you. But no, he instead approached you, gun pointed at you, nevertheless, when he could have already killed you and taken over your house by now. You hum and make eye contact with him.

‘Why keep me alive then?’ you ask him without beating around the bush. You study his mannerisms trying to catch something, anything to prove you he’s human. But he’s as unreadable as a statue. His gaze remains fixed on you, unblinking and stoic. You feel him studying you, taking in every detail of your person. He seems intent on reading into your every move.

In an even tone, he answers, 'Because you’re not a threat.’ His response catches you off guard, ego a little bruised at that, but you can’t argue with his logic. If he wanted to, he could have killed you by now, that’s for sure. You remain silent for a moment, processing his response. ‘But that doesn’t mean I trust you.’ He adds kicking off the beam and taking a step closer to you. He looks down at you tilting his head a little like a bird of prey watching a mouse, waiting for it to give chase and make the hunt more fun. You don’t give in to the urge to run inside and hide in your bedroom. Instead, you take a step towards him and look up at him ‘Because you need me’ you speak quietly. You can imagine a raised brow under that mask. You smile in triumph; even though he acts tough he needs help and all the intimidating façade was in a desperate attempt to get it.

‘I get it’ you continue having him figured out. ‘Your kid is sick and out there dangers are lurking at every turn. You need a place to stay until she gets better.’ You finish voicing your theory on why he’s really here having this conversation with you. His eyes closed in defeat. Gotcha, you smile even more widely at your deduction. ‘You can stay, you say as you turn and walk down the three steps of your porch heading towards the gate. ‘On one condition, you add stopping in your track. You turn fully towards him and he watches you curiously as if you’d have any power to demand him anything. ‘No harm comes to me or my dog’ you say remembering his earlier threats of him offing you both. ‘Do we have a deal?’ it’s not unreasonable, though it irks you that you have to bargain for your safety with a stranger. ‘Deal.’ He says in his usual gruff voice nodding to you in sign of respect for your demand.

‘Good’ you say as you stalk off towards where Bellamy lays muzzled and tied like a prisoner of war. You free her and she jumps at you happy to be in your proximity. She must have been worried sick here all alone. Poor thing. You then go to the gate and slide the too-large bolts meant to keep any unwanted guests outside. Or inside in your case. ‘And to think nothing interesting ever happens around her, right, Bell?’ your rhetorical question is met with a bark of agreement.

#simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #simon riley x you #simon ghost x reader #zombie au #cod mw2 #ghost cod #cod x reader #call of duty #slow burn #simon riley imagine #simon riley fanfic

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mylittleredgirl · 1 month

Text

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @geneeste. :) i may have done this one before, but tumblr blog search was traditionally unhelpful and i have several very important things i should be doing, so here we are <3

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 219

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 655,471

3. What fandoms do you write for?

stargate atlantis is the runaway lead, then sg-1, 90s/00s treks, the x-files, and a grab bag of other things. only two fics so far for m*a*s*h but the forecast looks good!

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

no sooner met (star trek voyager, j/c, eight years of friends-to-lovers in 5k or less)

career day (stargate sg-1, clone!sam/jack, damn that sure was a choice to go back to high school amirite)

next chapter (the good place, chidi/eleanor, the intimacy of reading)

first date (star trek voyager, j/c, falling in love again)

occupational hazards (the good place, chidi/eleanor, eleanor would rather not be the architect)

5. Do you respond to comments?

eventually!!!! i tend to keep nice ones on my home page for a while to cheer me up and then sometimes they get buried. i wake up nights like "damn the good place fandom really went all out with amazing comments on that random fic in like 2018 and i never replied," so maybe i need to go through my inbox and belatedly clear my cosmic debts.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

twilight (stargate atlantis, sheppard/weir, what if john didn't break the cycle). strong on style but real weak on comfort.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

weaving loose ends (stargate sg-1, sam/jack) ends with a wedding! in twenty years of writing romance fic, that has maybe only happened once?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not yet! but the year is young.

a fic of mine did cause a dramatic fandom schism once, in the dancing with the stars fandom no less. a splinter fan group created in exile! a mod claiming to be personal friends with the stars! everybody storming out and then blocking each other! so my fic did cause hate, but somehow i personally escaped unscathed. i didn't even get blocked. (lesson: in some spaces, rpf is encouraged until They Fuck. second lesson: if you start a fire and then stay very quiet, everyone forgets about you.)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

i do!! i guess!! but i'm struggling with it right now and it's giving me a complex. and "what kind" is like......... vanilla het fic for the most part tbh. gauzy curtain vibes, even. basically, i have to really sit and think about whether to rate something M or E, you know?

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

nope!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes, but not since the x-files days. rip geocities webrings we salute you for your years of service.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, but i think i'd like to! passing chapters back and forth sleepover style like "haha write your way out of THIS" would be fun. (or collaborating in a more mundane way, i guess....)

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

john sheppard/elizabeth weir (stargate atlantis). first fic in the tag and i'm still fuckin there. three years on tv and a lifetime in my goddamn brain.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

realistically, i'm feeling pretty down on the chances that i'll ever finish ANY wip that's longer than 20k, but the two long ones withering on the vine that i'd like to finish are a sam/jack sg1 episodic soulmate fic and "what if janeway went undercover with the maquis instead of tuvok: the novel."

16. What are your writing strengths?

stealing one of geneeste's answers because "character complexity" is a good one! i don't feel satisfied with any fic unless i feel like i have learned something new about a character, or highlighted it in a new way.

my more specific strength, according to @coraclavia, is missing-scene fics that weave through an entire series canon to make a thesis statement (they are In Love).

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

😭 i can't write anything long 😭 i really wish i were different 😭 i envy those of you with staying power who can return to a story after going to work or writing something else and keep plugging away at it. i used to write sprawling things when i was a teen, but since becoming Adult With Job now many years ago, i've totally lost that skill!!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

haaaahahahaha. talk about a weakness. i literally couldn't bring myself to write a fic that required dialogue in Ancient from stargate, a language that -- i cannot stress this enough -- is not even real. i'm like "well maybe i'll study latin for three years and then analyze all the episodes where they speak it to reverse engineer the differences so i can write the bastardized space latin correctly" GIRL WHY. JUST FUCK IT UP.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

first completed story that i recall would have been star trek voyager in my early teens, and by the grace of rural internet and some kind of prescient sense of self-preservation, it does not live online. first internet-published fic was several years later, for the x-files. for better or worse, that one can still be found.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

i think pieces (stargate atlantis, sheppard/weir, catharsis through sex pollen) might be the new best, and i had a lot of fun writing erasers on pencils (stargate sg-1, clone!sam/jack, catharsis through truancy).

i am sure many of my fic-writer-meme friends have done this already but @ussjellyfish if your answers have changed since whenever you did it last; i'd love to hear how @havocthecat, @anretc, and @coraclavia would answer this; and blowing dandelion meme seeds over the fence to the mash fandom: @remyfire!

#when i say i write short one-shots i just did some napkin math #and my average word count is below 3k and several of my longest 'fics' are collections #NOT BEATING THE ALLEGATIONS #fic asks #mai fic #i think i might find this under one of those tags the next time someone tags me so i will know for sure i've done it...

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h-harleybaby · 1 year

Note

can i have some jimmy dating hcs please ive been deprived if him😫

xxx

Ugh I’ve been deprived too 😭

But I’ll do it <333

Literally had to go look for Jimmy Valmer x reader to get a feel of it but I barely got shit so I’m just making this up as I go-

I wrote over half of this, and tumblr didn’t save it so I lost it >:(((((

Dating Jimmy Valmer hcs

• Jimmy’s such a sweet guy <33

• He probably shows up at your house with your favorite flowers and a few jokes he made with you in mind

• Y’all can’t hold hands a lot (because of his crutches, duh) but he loves physical contact so y’all probably go places arm in arm (more like you have your arm around his) if you can, but it’s pretty difficult

• Whenever he can, he tries holding your hand. If you get a bit embarrassed, he’ll hold your hand under the table and occasionally intertwines your pinkies

• He loves cuddling with you, and likes it when you lay on his chest with his head on top of yours or on your shoulder (he probably kisses your neck a lot at the same time too). He probably sits next to the stairs or somewhere that’s not the cafeteria and cuddles you so no teachers bother y’all.

• If you think Jimmy’s affectionate in public, he’s even more so in private. He loves when you hug him from behind, with your arm either around his waist or his shoulders as he writes jokes or something

• He would love to hang off you but he can’t really because he needs his crutches to walk, but he’ll gladly have the roles switched and let you hang off him

• He also loves to lay down with you and cuddle while y’all nap or something. Mid day naps with you are the best because normally during naps he wants to lay on you, so he tries being sly and laying between your chest. He thinks he’s the smartest person alive but you know what he’s doing. You don’t really say anything about it besides smile because you love him doing that

• He definitely tries to have sleepovers with you a lot and tries sneaking in (ofc with your knowledge) but his crutches are so noisy and if you have a room on the 2nd story of your house, forget it. But if you’re on the first floor he can just throw his crutches in and try lifting himself up through your window

• Jimmy’s a good guy tho, so he gets along with your parents and leaves a good impression on them. So it’s not too hard to convince them to let y’all have sleepovers and stuff

• He always wants to kiss, whether in public or not. He doesn’t even care if y’all are one step away from making out he can’t get enough of you

• Likes french kissing and he’s always smiling when y’all kiss

• “How do flowers kiss?? With their tulips” and then kisses you really quickly

• “My gf told me, ‘When you kiss my neck, it feels magical.’ guess you could say I'm a neckromancer.” (He says this while kissing your neck btw)

• He loves making you laugh, it makes him feel like he’s on top of the world. That and he loves the sound of your laugh

• Jimmy takes pride in knowing that he’s the one who can make you laugh and smile the most

• He also has a staring problem tbh

• I read this hc somewhere but completely agree with it, he probably stops in the middle of what he was saying because he looks at you and remembers why he thinks you’re the most gorgeous person he’s ever seen

• He likes helping out with anything he can, especially in the cooking department

• I don’t give a shit what you say, he likes cooking and always wants to help out in the kitchen >:(

• It’s perfect, isn’t it? Gf who loves baking and bf who loves cooking

• Doesn’t matter if it’s the most disgusting thing on this earth, if you made it he’ll eat it and say it’s delicious

• Most of the time tho, he brutally honest. It’s a life saver sometimes

• Hear me out, he took 3 straight days making a playlist for you

• He’s all secretive and asking you all sorts of questions about your favorite songs, song writers, and genres. Then once he’s done he sends you the link with a smiley face and says he hopes you like it. The playlist is 18 hours long 💀

• Jimmy’s love language is probably physical touch and acts of service. I’m not really good at thinking about those kind of stuff. But one of them is definitely physical touch

• Y’all are probably attached by the hip tbh

• He thinks about you all the time, but not in the obsessive way. It’s the I’m so in love with you way and they’d probably love this thing way

• Like I said in some other Jimmy hcs, he definitely talks about you in his comedy routine

• “Love is when I walk to the other side of the classroom to sharpen my pencil just so I can see her. And then I realize that I am holding a pen.”

It’s a smidge long, sorry 🥲

#south park x reader headcanons #south park x y/n #south park x reader #jimmy x reader #jimmy valmer x reader #Jimmy Valmer x reader headcanons #h harleybaby needs help #Harley’s anons <33 #Harley’s favs #harley’s requests!

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dangermousie · 11 months

Text

List of completed cdramas I plan to watch/rewatch

I’ve seen a lot of them in whole or in part (tho most so long ago it’s like starting from scratch, also I am terrible at finishing) but I haven’t a bunch, either.

Here is what you might see in this tumblr (it will take me probably two years to get through all of this tbh, also I am sure I am forgetting stuff)

The Advisors Alliance both seasons

As Flowers Fly and Fade Across the Sky

Beauty’s Rival in the Palace

Bichunmu

Big Shot/Da Ren Wu

Bu Bu Jing Xin

Chinese Paladin 1, 3, 5

Cuo Dian Yuan Yang

The Dream of Chang’an

Dugu (both dramas)

Empress of China (I have uncut version with Russian subs)

Gong 1-3 seasons

Female Prime Minister

The Firmament of the Pleiades

The Four

Four Women Conflict

General and I

Glamorous Imperial Concubine

God of War Zhao Yun

The Great Ambition

The Great Shaolin

Handsome Siblings 2005

Ice Fantasy

The Imperial Doctress

The Investiture of the Gods

The King’s Woman

The Lady and the Liar

Lan Ling Wang

The Legend and the Hero

Legend of Banshu

Legend of Condor Heroes 2008

Legend of Fuyao

Legend of Heavenly Tear

The Legend of the Military Seal

Legend of Mulan

The Legend of Qin

Listening Snow Tower

Little Fairy

Longest Day in Chang’an

Lost Love in Times

Love and Destiny

Love and Fight with the Terracotta Warrior

Love Better than Immortality

Love and Redemption

Novoland Eagle Flag

Novoland Tribes and Empires

Orphan of Zhao

Patriot Yue Fei

The Promise

The Promise of Chang’an

Qin Dynasty

Rebel Princess

Red Dust

Return of the Condor Heroes 2006

The Rise of Phoenixes

Rouge Snow

Siege in Fog

Singing All Along

Secret of the Three Kingoms

The Shanghai Bund

Song of the Clouds

Sound of the Desert

Song of Glory

Starry Night Starry Sea (period season)

The Story of Han Dynasty

The Story of Minglan

Three Kingdoms 2010

Too Late to Say I Love You

Under the Power

Untouchable Lovers

Vigilantes in Masks

The Virtuous Queen of Han

Wu Xin

Xuan Yuan Sword

Young Blood

The Young Warriors

Zu Legend

Man, I have enough to cover me until inevitable WW3 starts and we all have to depart for our bunkers.

#cdrama #references

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shukakumoodboard · 4 months

Note

*Pulls out my massive bag of money and jewels and blow* I’m your biggest fan so I must pick your brain now that you have a tumblr ask box. your finest gaalee romance hcs my good sir. Please

help.

I’m your biggest fan

did you know im crying ab this. kissing u on the face rn

ok gaalee romance headcanons. i've been thinking about this for days. grab ur mojito mix lets frockign gaur

ill be upfront in that i have very few i'll-die-on-this-hill opinions about the boys, but here's some i'm pretty stuck to <3

sfw headcanons

1. lee's better with words, gaara's better with actions, and they're both secretly envious of the other for it: my thoughts here are that gaara spent so much of his life not understanding love that he'd still struggle to articulate it in flowery ways that i think, as a born theatre kid, lee would be good at. but gaara would absolutely be that person who shows it in subtle ways -- like taking care of someone when sick, remembering food preferences, always ensuring lee takes care of himself when lee forgets or is busy having a self-flagellation moment. not that i think lee would be incompetent, but he strikes me as more of a scatterbrain, but would always be on top of verbal reassurances and affection (which i also think is what gaara would benefit from: clear straightforward declarations of feelings and intent)

2. they're both super cuddly in private look, you put together a touch-starved former monster vessel and a social outcast who mostly knows touch from violence (until gai) and you are going to get some clinginess imo. you can't convince me they're not the kind of people who would sit side by side at the dinner table so they can eat holding hands. bro (emotional)

3. they're probably actually really shit at "conventional" dating hear me out ok. they're like initially so far away and gaara is the whole president and lee kicked a meteor in half one time you think they can just wander around and go to restaurants? it's absolutely nonsense that shinobi don't suffer village celebrity paparazzi syndrome in nart tbh. not exactly the same but i have a whole wip in the bort-verse about them sneaking around. tldr i'd bet they sometimes get casual breakfast or dinner but i think more likely takeout and quiet time together as opposed to like fancy dates

4. language learning and hobbying as a form of devotion as a purveyor of my wares u may notice i have language headcanons. it is also my gaalee romance hc that they learn each others -- i've incorporated this into in the space between and a wip called multilingual, which is all about nejiten teasing lee about his crush on gaara in front of the man. i also think that lee would lean into gaara's gardening stuff with gusto because if it's something gaara loves, lee would want to love it too.

nsfw headcanons huehuehuhe

1. they're switches and i WILL die on this hill i think this is self explanatory but listen. listen i am SIQUE of the assigned top/bottom nonsense they both deserve to rail and also be railed. i may be the resident owner of the Rock Lee Fucks tag on AO3 but i also own the Gaara Fucks tag. ill kill a man over this

2. lee is absolutely a service anything this ties into the previous one. a big component of his canonical personality is that he's a disciple of gai -- he's a follower who bases a lot of himself around those he cares for. not the kind of person who is suddenly going to crop up with an intensely specific preference, imo? i think he would base his role on whatever his partner needs the most at the time.

3. rock lee's canonically huge dick ok lol listen. listen this one's canon jokes aside i think lee is hung as detailed in We Don't Talk About Fight Club and i will continue that joke. that being said i think normal hung. not arizona tea can hung which is a hilariously illustrated discord joke

4. tbh i think they're kinda vanilla in the bedroom i say this in a positive way i think they'd be far more into like, just being able to be with each other instead of getting into wild sexual mischief all over the villages although they definitely bone in weird places secretly. they Fuck, but like i don't see them as super kinksters or anything. however, i have seen many a kinkfic that im like nodding my head this is valid cakesitting bdsm what who said that

5. gaara's vaguely nebulous oral fixation i really have no justification for this one i just think some of those animal bijuu instincts might linger and turn into what that mouth do idk i keep going to write smut and whoops my whole body slipped and gaara's licking something. happened in fight club and fight club II, happened in hole time, happened in tgod, happens in at least two wips i have cookin' in the background... what is goin on actually

dkghkdf i hope you enjoyed this episode of kel's questionable headcanons. i really enjoyed answering, thank you so much for the ask <3

#fictalk #gaalee #leegaa #gaara #rock lee #writing gronp hours #nart #lol hole time #text #not sfw

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chronic-lesbian · 5 days

Note

Salam! I hope your day is going well!! Is it just me or is this site like, extremely islamophobic. I made the mistake of looking through the hijab tag and it made me feel so gross. I’m considering getting off of it entirely tbh but maybe i’d like it more if i strictly stayed away other blogs

Salam!!!! Oh I'm going to be honest this site is extremely islamophobic but loves to pretend like it's not. This is kind of gonna be a long reply so sorry for that fndjfjrjfb

The hijab/hijabi tag is mostly just blogs sexualizing people with hijabs, which is disgusting and gross and literally is going against the boundaries and wishes of hijabis, as we're literally covering up to avoid that, and as a hijabi thinking about it makes me feel sick.

A couple of years back I'd go through the blogs just to block and report but after I noticed those blogs never got deleted and that my reports seemed to not do anything I just gave up and stopped going to the tag to not upset myself.

Even general Islamophobia is very normalized, as it is also normal within society, and I've seen an uptick in open and loud islamophobia after Zionists got more bold on here, and some people seem to just parrot it without ever thinking about it.

I've personally even had whole arguments with people claiming that "people from developed countries (read: people who are more intelligent) are less religious" as if that's not the most racist and weird thing you could possibly say. Calling it out got me blocked and I was called a moron over it.

Or every time I make a post being angry about the hijab bans in West Europe and the islamophobia and racism that manifests itself through it, I get people telling me that islam is evil and i should go back to my country and that when I'm "back in my country" I'd be killed for being a lesbian so I should be grateful about European countries or whatever. Which is an insane thing to say and also. Again. Racist and Islamophobic but they fully think they're in the right.

It takes a lot of time tbh but I've found blogs that make it worth to stay on here, like other fellow lgbt Muslims or Muslims who are very open about being allies, and some non Muslim friends who do listen when I talk about these issues, would defend me if I ever needed it on here, and respect it when I correct them or point out something they've said is islamophobic and they change.

If you choose to stay, I'd really recommend trying to stay within the Tumblr you've curated for yourself and blocking people if they upset you. It's hard to not check what people are saying in certain tags sometimes and it's hard to just block and move on as well bc some of the things I've seen have been very upsetting, but in the end your mental health comes first and these people are not worth our time.

They're condescending bigots who are so filled with hatred and malice they seem to forget we as Muslims are a diverse group of people and we are human too. And sometimes said hatred can be crushingly casual, but finding people who understand and respect you will ultimately make this site and this experience so much better and tolerable.

In the end it is 100% your decision, and you should do what you think is the best for you, but if you want to vent about Islamophobia or just talk my inbox is always open!

#a little more than kin a little less than kind.txt

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the-moon-shine-drink · 4 months

Text

WOOOOOOO IM BACK BABYYYY (i keep forgetting tumblr exists tbh)

ASMODEUS HEADCANON TIME. I HAVE A WHOLE 3 PAGES IRL SO IF YOU WANT MORE LMK

-He is the strongest sin. However, he is the least likely to use his powers since he doesn’t need to use them as much as other sins like Bee. Another reason is Fizz. He knows the small bean boy gets antsy and nervous around fire, so that limits the usage more. His emotions control the heat/intensity of the fire, so he could most definitely kill a lot of people if he is angry enough.

~Bonus Part: Ozzie has a room in his mansion that is used as a sorta cool down room. It’s completely fire proof so he can let loose if he had a bad day. This was put in place so that he doesn’t have to bottle up his emotions, and he didn’t cause Fizz any anxiety if he saw what Ozzie could do.

-When Asmodues first opened Ozzie’s, he allowed single people so they could have the chance to not be single anymore. (shut up I know that’s bad grammar) But that changed about a year into it being opened when he saw too many drunk people hit on people that didn’t want to be hit on. Lucifer heard and got pissed at Ozzie, telling him to fix this or he’s shutting down the bar. So, now Ozzie only allows couples.

-Him and Mammon are exes. I can see them being super toxic to each other or it being a mutual agreement to break up. If it was a toxic relationship, Mammon only saw Ozzie as a toy for him to play with, and overall treated him like shit. He didn’t see Ozzie for being Ozzie, he saw Ozzie as being the embodiment of Lust. If it was a mutual agreement, they would’ve actually been really good to each other. It’s just work got in the way, and they broke off for them to succeed in work. It’s a little awkward, since Mammon still does Ozzie, but Ozzie moved on. But Ozzie doesn’t know that. (someone please remind me i want to make a fix on this /hj)

-When the two sins did date, Mammon would call Ozzie “Asmo”. He liked the nickname, but now it just reminds him of a time he doesn’t really wanted to be reminded of. It’s not like he hates it, he just hates the memories tied to it. He doesn’t really get called Asmo anymore, but Mammon will slip up if at a sins meeting. Ozzie refuses to let anyone else call him Asmo, especially not Fizz. Him and Fizz almost had a fight about it, but they talked it out because COMMUNICATION IS IMPORTANT.

-Him and Bee are best friends. They talk all the time. It’s a straight girl with her gay best friend. He’s the one who introduced Tex to her, and she told him to try a “business” relationship with Fizz. They’re each others wingmen, and would kill for each other. Ozzie and Bee are always on the phone when he’s not busy, and it makes their partners a little jealous sometimes. More Fizz than Tex, but every now and again he gets clingy.

-He is an insomniac. he works close to 100 hours a week, if not more. He had several companies he has to do product tests, paperwork, not to mention a the bar. He gets around an hour of sleep a night, maybe 2 if he’s lucky. The other part of the little sleep is a certain someone being “happy” to see him. He learned to run off a cup of coffee and an energetic imp to keep him awake.

Hope you enjoyed! As usual, requests are allowed! I’ll do headcanons for any helluva boss ir hazbin charecter. See ya later!

#helluva boss #asmodeus helluva boss #helluva boss fizzarolli #helluva fizzarolli #helluva asmodeus #helluva boss headcanon #asmodues headcanons #helluva boss mammon #helluva boss beelzebub

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verysium · 3 months

Note

what do you read in your spare time? you’re one of the most eloquent users i know, id love to hear how you find the media you consume and what your favorites are

omg ei 😊 welcome back to the inbox! thank you for your sweet words although i'm probably not qualified enough to be considered the full definition of eloquent. i am going to preface this post by saying that i definitely don't read as much as i should, so this list is not going to be comprehensive whatsoever. the last time i even visited an in-person library was like half a decade ago, and since then my spare time has been nonexistent lmao. anyways, here are some of my favorite/most recent reads as listed by author:

POETRY

richard siken: i think siken is already well-known both in the literary world and in whatever booktok deems is popular culture. if you don't already know him though, he is best known for his poetry collection crush, which delves into themes of obsession, gay love, and violent eroticism. i actually read this chapbook unknowingly. as in i was hounding sketchy pdf download sites at 3 AM and saw a man with bloodied lips on the cover and decided to read it. he basically became my summer fever dream after that. the way he juxtaposes images is seamless, smoother than water. only richard siken can talk about violence without making it sound violent. i also enjoyed his other poetry collection war of the foxes, especially "portrait of fryderyk in shifting light." i think light is a common motif throughout most of his poems, and he manipulates it effortlessly. the most recent piece i read from him is "piano lesson." i have nothing left to say that he didn't already say, so i would just recommend reading it for yourself. he is the og big brain when it comes to word play.

ocean vuong: he's unforgettable, and i mean that literally because nobody forgets a person named ocean. time is a mother was exactly what the name suggests: an exploration of grief, loss, and the rewind of time after his mother's death. some of the poems are almost cinematic in quality. "künstlerroman" is my favorite because it feels exactly like watching a video tape in reverse. i think his most famous work is "someday i'll love ocean vuong." it was the first piece i ever read from him, and to this day, it remains my comfort poem.

silas denver melvin: i only recently discovered him through his chapbook grit. i think he's also on tumblr @/sweatermuppet. he writes a lot on the trans experience, and his work gives me a mix of southern gothic and country vibes. would definitely read his other publications if i had the time.

chen chen: one thing about chen chen is that he always comes to devour. my favorite works from him are "self-portrait as so much potential" and "song of the anti-sisyphus." you have to put on your thinking cap for some of his poems, but once you grasp the meaning, everything makes sense all at once.

franny choi: "disaster means without a star" was the entire inspiration behind my first rin fic. i relate to her more personally in regards to the diaspora experience, but her collections are worth reading in general because of the sheer quality.

pages matam: his poem "piñata" was what got me into slam poetry. his work mostly consists of political commentary which i feel is particularly relevant in today's social climate. "on learning america's english" also resonates with people who have encountered the entire losing/learning immigrant tongues experience.

laura lamb brown-lavolie: i've only read one spoken word poem from her, and tbh i only needed to read one. "on this the 100th anniversary of the sinking of the titanic, we reconsider the buoyancy of the human heart" is my two-headed calf poem. one day i will get this tattooed.

brendan constantine: once again, this was the result of me being chronically online coupled with the boredom of an august heat wave. i found "the opposites game" through TED. honestly, i was a bit unsure about it at first, but it's a cute little poem that makes you really delve into the intricacies of craft.

TEEN POETRY & PROSE

yasmeen khan: she could mouth her words onto every square inch of my body, and i would still be coming back for more. ingraining them into flesh is not enough. "movie stars" is by far my favorite work from her. she writes about femininity and womanhood so profoundly. it's tragic, but really i wouldn't have it end any other way.

kaya dierks: her writing is basically middle-of-nowhere small town stoner teenage life but personified. "crushed" is my favorite piece from her. the soundtrack for this work was definitely by ethel cain, and you cannot convince me otherwise.

FICTION

madeline miller: i was first introduced to her when i read the song of achilles. let's just say that book had me nonverbal for the greater half of three months. it was my metaphorical hatchet. i buried it once, and i never want to dig it up again. i read circe a few years later. the first time was during the blue hour at an airport, right between one red-eye flight and another transfer. i don't even remember that experience because i was heavily sleep-deprived. i read it again recently for a literature course, this time for academic analysis. overall, i enjoy the the heroine-centric narrative. typically, i'm a bit wary of novels with heavy feminist themes because they either project their agenda too strongly or they run the risk of misrepresentation. circe doesn't exactly have that problem. it was more about empowerment and less about exercising power over others.

charlotte brontë: as a historical figure, brontë was questionable, but jane eyre most certainly was not. that book rewired my brain, and that is saying something because i have never read any classic by choice. and it is so important to me that jane was the ugliest, plainest girl you could ever imagine. also cus i unironically enjoy angst, and this book was full of dramatic misunderstandings.

yoko ogawa: i love japanese literature, so there is no reason not to include this one here. "a peddler of tears" is one of my favorite short stories. i did not expect the ending at all, but it was welcome. something about violence, body gore, and dismemberment being framed as romantic and semi-erotic just gets to me. sign me the hell up. hotel iris is a hit-or-miss with some people. either you like the fact that art makes you uncomfortable or you shut it down completely. for me, i was alright with exploring some of its darker themes, but read at your own discretion.

NONFICTION

ross gay: he lives up to his name both in optimism and in carefree joy. probably one of my favorite creative nonfiction authors simply based off the accessibility of his writing style. easy to read and understand but still hits you with the full force of a semi-truck. i would recommend his book inciting joy. it's a collection of essays that delve into grief, but since this is ross gay, he makes it seem like a quintessential part of life.

paul kalanithi: sixteen-year-old me was mind blown by him cus before that doctors were shrewish old men with bald spots and sterile coats, not poetic surgeons who dissected the anatomy of word and recited t.s. eliot in the most heart-wrenching way possible. he is everything i want to become in both life and death. when breath becomes air literally does take your breath away.

#asks #moots ♡

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