#such a good birthday thanks to my baby :’) life has been hard but at least we have each other. and snoopy!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

boba-beom · 9 months

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·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ super shy | HUENINGKAI

pairing: kai x gn!reader

genre: fluff, little suggestive, humour | oneshot

warnings: pictures are black hair kai but I mention current kai (blond kai), established relationship, attempts of flirting, kai’s attempt at a pick-up line lmao, flustered kai, bickering (affectionately), kai and reader trying to out-flirt each other, pet names (my love, sweetheart, baby ect.), kisses, a lot of physical affection, the first and many ‘I love you’ 🤭

summary: going through the transition of being in love with your best friend to actually being an official item has been a huge learning curve for the both of you. it’s been 7 months since that day and you adore him so much that you so happen to slip up the ‘L’ word.

wc: 1.4k

a/n: an incredibly late fic for kai’s birthday <3 after the bulacan concert it made me so grateful to have known a precious soul like him :’) he’s so endearing I think I’m a closeted ningdungie 🥹 I have so much love for him :(( I hope you guys enjoy reading!!

the holding hands, lingering kisses and copious amounts of hugs have been the highlights of your relationship. however, the inside jokes, the deep talks and the genuine comfort you feel from each other is what made you two progress further to your full potential of being inseparable from one another.

“yn, what’re you doing today?” kai asks through the phone, his head tilting to a cute angle to which his unstyled, blond hair brushes over his eyes. his hair is getting so long now, you think to yourself.

“I’ve just been cleaning the flat, really. wanna come over? I miss you.” you say, folding one of your boyfriend’s hoodies that he left because of that one time you didn’t want him to leave, as per. his scent is still as strong from when he applied cologne on the neck of the clothing; hints of sweet fruits with a floral touch. he knew how much you loved it when you’d nuzzle into the crook of his neck while cuddling.

whenever your flatmate was away he’d offer to stay over until they came back, and recently he stayed for almost 3 weeks. you never want to waste a day when you’re together, and if you don’t have many plans you would go for a long walk, at least once a day, if not every other day.

“you miss me?” he giggles. he knows that even being together for three whole weeks isn't enough. “what do you want me to bring over?”

this was a habit of his. always having to bring something over at your place, whether it be his nintendo switch console which would lead to never-ending rounds of mario kart or food, but you only wanted one thing. you place down the folded hoodie and pull an exaggerated thinking face, arms crossed with your index finger to your chin.

“I think you should just bring yourself, I can never get enough of you.” you wink at him and watch his cheeks gradually ombre into pink hues from your statement.

“I’ll be there in fifteen!” he chimes, rushing to end the call and get ready. you giggle to yourself, he's so cute and it's just so endearing.

there have been times where you were indecisive about your relationship, but not because you didn’t know if you liked kai or not, but because if things don’t work out you just hoped that it wouldn’t be awkward. thankfully, the both of you had the same idea to confess to each other — thanks to taehyun and beomgyu’s hard work in trying to push you guys to do so. now, being in this situation you can finally say that you’re at a good place in life.

a specific knocking pattern on the door was something you’ve been anticipating since kai ended the call, knowing that he does his cute little rhythm. he told you before that he only has two knocking patterns; the standard five knocks in a row and his little pattern he has only for you.

as soon as you open the door you find him holding a bouquet of red tulips, his tall figure almost hovering above you as he has this boyish grin on his face.

“I got you these tulips, but I’m hoping our two lips can meet instead.” he presents the bouquet in one hand from behind his back. he opens his arms for you to jump up and wrap your arms over his shoulders while his wraps around your waist.

your foreheads lean against each other before you chuckle while maintaining eye contact, “baby, you’re so cute, you know.” you whisper before tilting your head to capture his lips in a sweet kiss. his lips lingered a little longer, pecking your lips a couple more times before pulling away.

“I’ve missed you too.” he gives you a gentle forehead kiss before letting you get back onto your feet.

grabbing ahold of his hand you lead him into the living room where you expect him to get comfy, but as you go into the kitchen to grab him a glass of grape juice from the fridge he follows you, wanting to do it himself. you being stubborn, you do it before him and he admits defeat.

you can feel his body heat radiate behind you as you stand by the countertop and he gives you a long back hug, resting his chin on your shoulder and feeling his soft exhales hitting the side of your neck.

“I could have done it myself. you know this is like my home too.” he tightens his arms around your waist, nuzzling into your neck until you feel the hairs standing.

“I know, but I wanna do it for you, baby.” his hold on you loosens, but he doesn’t let you go. just loose enough for you to turn around with his arms still around you until he decides to lean against the countertop, trapping you in the middle. you lean back a little to see his expression, he’s trying his best to not break into a grin as you watch the corners of his lips itching to turn upwards. the pink hues on the apples of his cheeks were still blooming.

“you drive me insane, yn.” he kisses your temple, before taking ahold of the glass of grape juice you had just poured out for him, watching him walk into the living room so nonchalantly and finding an anime movie to watch together.

you follow after him and sit close enough for your legs to hang over his lap. you love the physical affection. even as best friends back then, the both of you would always be mistaken as a couple from the way you two would have your hands lingering together with the urge to intertwine, linking arms, and even from sharing food or drinks.

kai was someone you were happy with your parents meeting. your dad had already started to treat him like his son-in-law after you heard that they would go out to eat together while you were at work.

it’s almost like he was an angel sent to you, with every one of your loved ones approving of him from the very beginning.

“oh, do I now?" you tease as you playfully stick out your tongue.

"oh always." he matches your sarcastic energy, and you both laugh together for a moment. his gesture was the opposite of his words.

he brings his gentle hand to cup your face with his thumb slowly rubbing your cheek back and forth. you swear you could feel your heart about to jump out of your chest, you were hoping if it did that kai would catch it regardless. the motion was so endearing that you hadn't realised that the both of you had been staring into each other's eyes. his eyes were so beautiful. holding all things lovely and genuine with a hint of playfulness as he scans your face, which was reciprocating the same.

you sigh into the warmth of his palm, "I love you, kai."

his thumb stops moving and his eyes widen ever so slightly, "yn, I-"

"oh my god, I didn't realise. it just... slipped." a bashful smile replaces the shocked expression you had for a fraction of a second.

"so, you don't love me?" kai raises a brow, putting his hand down back on his lap.

"no! oh god." panic courses through your veins as you find a way to save yourself in this situation. "of course I love you. I love you so much you don't understa—"

you didn't get to finish your sentence, yet kai has pressed his lips against yours. the familiar warmth igniting in your chest as he tilts his head and you following after. you've never kissed anyone like this before, the type that makes your chest heave from the lack of air. the type that makes your heart pound so much that it's all you hear in your ears. the type of kiss that feels just right, knowing you have found your person, and it's kai. it's always been kai.

pulling your lips away, he chases them once more for quick pecks as if you're his favourite baked good from the bakery. your foreheads rest against each others, watching his lips transition from a held back smile to a full grin and an airy giggle.

"don't be silly, my love." he starts. "of course I understand. and I love you so so much that words are not enough."

"do you think our two lips should meet again?" you rest your head on his shoulder, facing his neck. he shudders from your warm exhales against his skin.

"I know our two lips should meet again," he kisses your temple. "and again," then to your cheek. "and again." and a final kiss to your lips, reuniting them once more.

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#kflixnet #k-labels #hueningkai x reader #hueningkai fluff #hueningkai scenarios #hueningkai imagines #hueningkai oneshot #hueningkai fanfic #txt fluff #txt x reader #txt imagines #txt scenarios #txt oneshot

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erin-bo-berin · 2 years

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ok ok I just randomly had another thought. Reader and Steve have always known they'd have kids eventually, but Steve's been trying to convince her to start trying for ages and she keeps being like yeah soon soon just not yet. so Steve's casually mentioning it the morning of his X birthday as he and reader snuggle in bed, and she's giving him the same old story later later--they've developed this whole routine so it's not a big deal when it happens. he has such baby fever it just comes up at any opportunity these days.

so they have his birthday party with the whole gang. and I don't know how you're going to do this but maybe Robin brings her niece?? and we get to see Steve interact with this little baby and his baby fever is just getting worse. and obviously he's adorable and so good with this baby and doesn't want to give her back.

and after everyone finally leaves the party you have two presents for him. first, some very sexy lingerie (you've never worn anything like this before and Steve is going to have to work very hard not to tear it to shreds when he rips it off of you) and so you're getting busy and you're about to really get into it but you have a second gift for him... you're finally ready to start trying for a baby so you give him something that signifies that. I like the idea of giving him your IUD in a velvet jewelry type box but maybe that's anachronistic? I have no idea I just want him to look up into your eyes and know exactly what that is and be like babe? are you serious?

and then we watch this poor boy lose his fucking mind going to town on you (opportunity for breeding kink but not necessary)

I know you have lots of other fic ideas you're working through Erin. I mostly wrote this bc I thought you might like it--no pressure to actually write it if it's not interesting to you!

ok love you bye 🔥🏀

YES HOLY YES. I love this so much I can’t wait for you to read this. Just IMAGINE the disbelief and happiness!

Yes, I’m using another gif of him shirtless in the upside down. Am I sorry? No.

Birthday Wishes

Steve Harrington x Reader

Warnings: Smut

“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to yoooouuuu!”

Steve groaned, opening his eyes, seeing you laying next to him, head propped in your hand. You were beaming and singing at the top of your lungs.

“Happy birthday dear Steeeeeve,” you continued.

“You’re a horrible singer, you know,” he mumbled sleepily.

You didn’t let that deter you from finishing the song.

“Haaaaappyyyy birthday toooo youuuu!”

He chuckled, amused by your performance.

“Thank you, baby,” he smiled, kissing your nose.

“Did you like the song?” you beamed.

“Eh. 5 out of 10,” he joked.

You gasped dramatically.

“Five out of ten? You hurt me.”

You knew good and well that you couldn’t carry a tune to save your life, so you didn’t take the teasing to heart.

“The look on your face when you woke up was priceless though. You looked like you were in pain.”

“I was. At least my ears were,” he grinned.

“Asshole,” you laughed, hitting his chest.

He laughed, pulling you closer to him.

“So, are you looking forward to your party today?” you asked, laying your head in the crook of his arm.

“I am,” he said, “I don’t know how I got so lucky to have such great friends and a girlfriend to throw me such an extravagant party.”

“Only for the best birthday boy,” you beamed.

“You know what would really make it the best birthday ever?” he asked, nosing your cheek.

You had an idea where he was going with this and you snickered.

“Hm? What would that be?”

“If you finally agreed to start trying for a baby.”

You felt his pout against your collarbone and you laughed inwardly.

Starting a family was something you and he had discussed many times before. It was something you wanted to, but you’d been putting him off, telling him soon. At first, it was because you wanted to wait a bit, but for last few weeks, it had been for a different purpose.

“Soon,” you promised.

He frowned, though didn’t look upset by your answer, just looked like a puppy trying to convince its owner to drop a piece of meat. He was literally giving you puppy dog eyes.

“You’re going to deny me on my 21st birthday?”

His pout deepened and you couldn’t help the giggle that escaped your lips.

“What’s so funny?” he huffed a laugh, all smiles again.

“You just look so cute when you give me the puppy dog eyes,” you smirked.

“Cute enough for a baby?”

“Ah, nice try,” you grinned, wagging your finger at him, “Someone better be a good boy if he wants his presents later.”

“Like at the party later?” he questioned, brow raised.

“Like in private, later.”

Your smile was devious; his interest was piqued.

“I like the sound of that,” he hummed, leaning in for another kiss.

You stopped him with a hand to his chest.

“You need to get ready for your party, big boy. You can’t be late for your own birthday party.”

He relented, sitting up in bed. He threw you a smirk as he headed to the bathroom.

“Who cares? I’m the man of the hour anyway.”

•

“I don’t know which birthday song was worse, yours or all the kids’ screaming version,” Steve muttered to you, taking a bite of his cake.

“You love them,” you laughed softly.

“I do,” he grinned.

“Look who I brought!” came a singsong voice.

“It’s about time Robin showed up,” Steve rolled his eyes, “Always late for something.”

“This time you’ll be thrilled when you see why,” you said, pointing over his shoulder.

Robin had brought her niece, Anna with her. The little girl was just barely six months old, full of curiosity and spoiled rotten already by her auntie Robin. You and Steve absolutely loved Anna.

“Better go get you some baby cuddles,” you told him, “Before Joyce spots her and hogs her for the rest the afternoon.”

Joyce was so maternal and a great mom to her two boys, Jonathan and Will and her adopted daughter El. She loved deeply and fiercely, willing to go to bat for her kids at any time. She was starting to get anxious for grandkids though and you were positive whenever you and Steve had kids, she was adopting them as her own grandkids.

“Already on my way.”

You laughed, watching Steve make a beeline for Robin, taking Anna in his arms. He smiled at her, talking to her and booping her nose with his finger.

Seeing Steve with the kids and babies especially, did weird things to you. You felt a bit of a longing, wanting that to be your own baby. You felt love, seeing how good he was with them. You felt desire, the desire to want to have his babies.

You took a sip of your drink, eyes still glued to your boyfriend.

All in due time.

•

“I’m not sure who spoils her more, you or me,” Robin watched Steve with a grin.

“Definitely me,” he affirmed with a nod, “But she’s just too sweet not to.”

He pretended his hand was a tickle monster, it attacking her tummy making her squeal with laughter.

“Is that funny, is that funny?” he cooed to her, kissing her head, “Uncle Steve loves to make you laugh.”

“You have such baby fever right now,” Robin shook her head.

He groaned.

“I know. I can’t help it.”

“Y/N still hasn’t changed her mind?”

He frowned, shaking his head no.

“She says she wants to. At least she has before, but she just keeps saying “later” or “soon”. What if she’s changed her mind and doesn’t want kids? Or worse, doesn’t want kids with me?” he frowned, brows furrowing at the thought.

“I think you’re just overthinking it,” she said plainly.

“Why do you say that?”

“One, she’s crazy about you Steve. She loves you so much. I doubt she doesn’t want to have kids with you. Two, it’s a big deal, Steve. It’s a big responsibility and maybe it still scares her. Just give her time. Although,” she smirked, peering over his shoulder, “The smolder of her gaze is enough to set your entire outfit on fire, which I’m sure she’d welcome right about now.”

He turned around, seeing you staring at him. You smiled, waving at him innocently before turning to a conversation Max and Dustin were having.

“What are you talking about?” he asked, bewildered.

Robin was just giving him a knowing smirk.

“Just the way she was staring at you just now, while you’ve been holding Anna? She’s practically screaming “let me have your babies!” Steve.”

“I think you’re exaggerating.”

“And I think you’re blind,” she retorted, “I’m telling you, all you gotta do is seduce her a little cause she looks ready for it.”

“Ugh, ew, Robin. I am not discussing my sex life with you.”

“Thankfully,” she shot back, dryly, “All I’m saying it that you should keep trying. I think you both are going to make great parents.”

Steve smiled, handing Anna the toy that had fallen out of her grasp.

“You think so?”

“I know so.”

•

Before the party wrapped up, you’d excused yourself claiming you had to prepare Steve’s present from you. Technically, you were.

You left specific instructions with Robin to let Steve know where to find you when the last person left. You squirm anxiously when you hear his footsteps coming down the hall.

You sit on the end of the bed, waiting anxiously, chewing on the bottom of your lip.

“Babe?”

“In here,” you called back, sweetly.

The door opened and he froze in the doorway, jaw practically on the floor. You hadn’t done anything like this before, so you were a tad nervous at his silence.

You’d bought a matching lingerie set—rose red. It was a sexy, lacy bra and panties set that you felt extremely self-conscious when you’d slipped it on earlier, but his reaction looked promising.

“Damn,” he breathed, “Happy birthday to me.”

You giggled.

“You like?”

“I love.”

He was already pulling his shirt over his head and it was left on the floor by the time he reached you, hand sliding into your hair, kissing you roughly. You moaned appreciatively as his other hand squeezed your breast through the lacy thing, so thin he could feel your nipple pucker through it.

“I’m gonna…” he managed between kisses, “Rip this…” Another rough kiss. “Fucking outfit off you.”

“Please don’t,” you grinned, tilting your head, eyes closing as his lips feasted on your neck, “It was pricy and I was hoping we might be able to use it again.”

His teeth sank into your neck and you gasped at the sensation, his tongue licking over the bitten area, soothing it.

“Hell yes. You’re never getting rid of this.”

Your laughter turned into moans as his hand dipped into one cup of your bra, fingers pinching at your nipple. The slight pinch sent sparks of electricity straight to your clit that had quickly began throbbing, your need for him multiplying in every passing second.

His mouth was back on yours, as you fell back on the bed, him hovering over you. His knee was situated between your legs and you subconsciously ground against his thigh as his tongue moved with yours.

“So needy already baby?” he whispered, hands gliding over your stomach, hooking it into the waistband of the red, lacy panties then snapping it gently against your skin.

You didn’t care that he’d hardly done anything to you and you were already moaning for him as you answered him.

“Yes,” you groaned, “Need you so bad, birthday boy.”

You bit your lip at the growl came from deep within his chest. His hand rubbed over your now dripping pussy, positive he could feel just how wet you were through the material. Somehow, he also managed to unhook your bra with one hand, nimble fingers hard at work.

You slid the straps down your arms, slowly, seductively as he watched you with desire heavy eyes. You tossed it across the room and he took you in with an approving moan. He was hard and throbbing, you could feel it against your hip.

“Get those off,” you ordered, nodding to his jeans.

“Yes ma’am,” he mumbled, standing up long enough to rid of them, returning to hover over you in just his boxers.

“As much as I love these,” he said, leaning down, his tongue trailing over the skin right above the band of your underwear, “They’re gonna have to go.”

“Unwrap me, big boy,” you taunted.

You pretty sure you heard a tiny rip in the underwear as he practically clawed them off like a wild animal. His finger circled your clit, as he kissed your hip bone tenderly before sucking harshly on the area.

You arched in reaction, nudging him with the side of your knee.

“Steve,” you breathed, “Before I become too far gone. I have one last present for you.”

He looked up at you, heat in his eyes.

“What could be better than this?”

“Just wait. I think you’ll like this.”

You sat up, leaning over to pull open the drawer of the bedside table and pulled out a velvet jewelry box.

“Aw, you got me jewelry? You shouldn’t have,” he quipped sarcastically, sitting back on his ankles.

“Shut it butthead,” you laughed, “It’s what’s inside. Open it.”

You handed it to him and he opened it.

“Um your birth control pills?”

“Look closely,” you murmured, bringing your bottom lip in between your teeth, “I haven’t taken it for the last two weeks.”

His eyes snapped up to yours.

“What are you saying?”

He had an inkling of an idea, but he had to hear it come from your mouth just to be a hundred percent sure.

“I want to have a baby. With you, Steve.”

That was all it took. He disposed of the case on the nightstand, not caring if it made it to the surface or fell to the floor—although it was a thoughtful and a gift he loved, he had more important things to take care of in the moment.

His hands cupped your face as he kissed you hard, passionately, full of the fire and longing and happiness he felt. You were already tugging on his boxers, pushing them down as you kissed him back.

“Let’s put a baby in you,” he growled against your lips.

“Yes sir,” you teased.

The teasing lilt didn’t last long though when he thrusted roughly and deeply into you, making you moan in an unusually wanton way. His mouth found your pulse point, sucking on it. You were sure he could feeling your racing heart beneath his lips.

It’s like you’d unleashed something wild in him tonight as he thrust into you roughly, gripping your hips hard enough to leave bruises on them from his fingers.

His hands snaked under your ass and lifted your hips just enough that with every thrust his pubic bone hit your clit, making you see stars behind your eyes. Your legs were wrapped around his back, hands grabbing his own ass as you tried to push him deeper into you.

It was rough, sweaty and passionate sex. In fact, it was the most intense sex you’d ever had with Steve and it was hot. There was something primal about it as you let your body be completely lost in his, moaning without abandon.

Your moans had become a chorus of Steve, oh god and yes. His usually perfectly swooped hair now fell into his face, giving him a sexy, rugged look, the ecstasy written into every micro expression on his face.

His hips tilted the slightest, hitting a delicate spot so perfectly, it made you arch into him with a whine. Your body was buzzing and you couldn’t get enough of him.

“So good, baby,” he groaned, eyes falling shut, “Gonna fill you up until you’re leaking my cum.”

His words were as good as giving you an electric shock and your pussy clenched around him, your orgasm coming dangerously close to unleashing itself throughout your body.

“Steve,” you whined, chest heaving as you reached between your connected bodies to rub your clit.

With a growl, he knocked your hand away, replacing it with his own. Your mouths met in a sloppy kiss as you both got closer to undeniable bliss.

His mouth attacked your neck, sucking hard enough that you knew there’d be bruises left later. His moans were muffled by your skin, but somehow that made it even better as he worked you until you were trembling.

“Cum for me, baby,” he uttered just as you could no longer hold back.

He was throbbing inside you and the feeling became too much as you squeezed around him again, fireworks going off in your head, whole body arching into him.

You cry was pleasure filled as your fingers and heels of your feet dig hard into his skin, the orgasm powerful and swift as it swept through your body. Within a few more thrusts, he was following you, his eyes squeezed and lips parted in such a beautiful sight.

Your soft moan was met with a kiss as you felt the warmth of his release dripping down your thighs. You loved feeling him cum within you, but it was even more special tonight after your gift.

He thrust a few more times, pushing his cum back inside you and smirked against your lips as you squirmed at the sudden sensitivity.

“Gotta make sure it keeps, babe.”

When he pulled out of you—even as sensitive and sore you were—you missed the fullness, the stretch and kinda immediately wanted him back inside you.

He grabbed a pillow from the head of the bed, sliding it under your hips and elevating your lower half. You watched, amused, even in your half dazed and sated state.

“I read somewhere to keep your legs propped up for at least half an hour after sex if you want to get pregnant,” Steve explained sheepishly.

You grin, obliging him as he settles next to you.

“You know, it’s a lot more fun if we don’t get pregnant right away,” you pointed out.

“Jesus,” he breathed, “You keep doing that to me and I just might die.”

“Well, people always say trying is the fun part,” you smirked.

“I’m definitely not denying it,” he laughed, rubbing a hand over your stomach, pulling you closer for a kiss.

“Thank you for making my birthday wish come true,” he smiled, his forehead resting against your own.

You had a devious smile on your lips as you pulled back so you could look at him more clearly.

“Oh honey, we’re only just beginning the celebration.”

He groaned as he captured your lips with his, once again climbing over you.

The birthday boy was going to be in for a night of celebrating, that’s for sure.

#steve harrington #steve harrington smut #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington fic #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve harrington x reader #stranger things #stranger things blurb #stranger things fic #stranger things smut

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call-me-maggie13 · 10 months

Text

Year One

JC was supposed to be home hours ago. Ava’s trying not to cry, she’s coated in flour and the cake is a rock hard, inedible brick. Diana crawls into the kitchen, babbling and blowing raspberries at Ava.

"Hi, hi! Hey, baby!" Ava wipes her hands on the dishrag and picks her up. "Are you having a good day?"

Diana babbles at her then sticks her tongue out and giggles, Ava smiles and sticks her tongue out in response.

The door opens, thumps loudly against the wall and JC stumbles into the house. He brings the smell of a sticky bar floor with him, rocking and stumbling like a drunken sailor during a hurricane.

"Oh, hey," JC slurs, offering Ava a peace sign and a nod. Ava sighs and walks away, lowering Diana into her playpen and handing her a shape sorting toy.

"You’re late." She wants to grab him by the shoulders and shake him, she settles for pushing past him. "Did you get a cake?"

"I had a shit day at work, thanks for asking, Ava." She can hear him rolling his eyes.

"Did you bring a cake or not, JC?"

"Fuck," he groans, leaning against the doorframe and running his hand through his hair. He looks exhausted, bags under his bloodshot eyes. Ava finds she doesn’t much care.

"It’s your daughter’s birthday and you didn’t get her a cake? Did you at least get her a present? Something to unwrap?"

He doesn’t answer, stuffs his hands deep into his pockets and cuts his eyes away. His jaw is clenched, the line hard and strong beneath the muscle, his throat bobs as he swallows.

"No?" She shakes her head and fights back the tears in her eyes. "No. Of course not, why would you?"

"I’m going to change." He turns and stalks down the hall, slamming the bedroom door behind him. It rattles the pictures on the wall and makes Diana flinch.

"Yeah. Great talk, JC." She calls after him, lifting a now screaming Diana from the playpen and trying to calm her. JC yells something back at her, but she can’t tell what he said over Diana’s cries. It doesn’t matter, she realizes, because she doesn’t care what excuses he has anymore.

They don’t talk the rest of the evening. JC brings her one of Diana’s stuffed animals wrapped in a plastic grocery sack — it’s not like she’ll remember, he had said and Ava had wanted to punch him — and they spend supper pretending they’re not angry.

JC plays a game on his phone in bed while Ava puts Diana to sleep, tinny electronic explosions and rapid gunfire echoing through the room until he groans and drops the phone on his chest.

"Happy birthday, Diana." Ava whispers when she puts her down, stroking her cheek and kissing her forehead. She sits on the edge of the bed and watches her sleep, wishing she’d been able to give her a better birthday.

"I can’t believe it’s been a year," she murmurs when she joins JC in bed, the man scoffing and rolling his eyes. "What? Say it, JC. Just fucking say it."

"Worst year of my life. Is that better? Did that make you feel better?" He raises his voice and Ava checks that Diana isn’t woken by it. JC sees and stands, stomps into the hall and motions for Ava to follow.

"You can’t fucking say that." Ava whisper-yells when they get to the living room. JC laughs, cold and hard and angry.

"I told you." He shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair before pointing an accusatory finger in Ava’s face, she flinches and steps back. He drops his hand with a sigh. "I told you I didn’t want to keep it."

"Keep it? It? Do you mean her, JC? She’s a year old. You’ve had a year."

"I didn’t want a baby." He’s quiet, his voice breathy and soft. "I told you when you found out."

"But you stayed!" Ava doesn’t mean to yell, holding her breath and waiting to see if she woke Diana.

"What was I supposed to do, Ava? Leave you pregnant and homeless? Abandon you with a newborn on the side of the street? I never wanted this. Don’t make me the bad guy."

"You don’t have to stay."

"I don’t want to!" She flinches at his booming voice. "Is that what you want to hear, Ava? I. Don’t. Want. To. Stay."

Diana cries, loud and howling and Ava wants to join her. She wants the ground to open up and swallow her.

"Then don’t." Saltwater races down her cheeks, drips from her chin to the floor and JC’s face falls. "I’ll find a job and an apartment. You don’t have to stay."

"Ava…" his fingers brush her elbow and she jerks away, dodges past him to get to Diana.

"No. It’s fine. You don’t want a baby. I’ll figure it out."

Neither says anything for a long time, they stare at each other in silence until JC sighs and shakes his head.

"I’ll sleep out here."

Ava nods and turns away, starting toward where Diana is wailing.

"Ava, wait." She stops and turns to him, eyebrows raised and breath held. He smiles sadly and nods at her, swallowing before continuing. "I just… thank you. I’m sorry."

Ava cries herself to sleep, apologizing for being a terrible mother to Diana who’s asleep on her chest. She’d ruined Diana’s first birthday, she’s going to grow up resenting Ava. What kind of mother ruins her baby’s first birthday?

JC helps Ava move that same weekend, leaving her with everything she could ever possibly need to raise a baby. He sends double what she asks for child support, but they don’t see each other again. She keeps up with him on social media, watches as he travels the world and chases girls and spends far too many weekends too drunk to remember his name.

He looks happy.

Year Two

"Is it supposed to look like that?" Lilith points at the lump on the breakfast bar. Beatrice frowns at her and wipes her hands down the front of her apron. She’s covered in flour and there are eggshells at her feet.

"Lilith, leave them alone," Camila grabs her by the elbow and drags her back to where they’re playing with Diana, who’s dressed in a yellow princess gown and tiara. Diana waves at Beatrice with a smile before returning to her tea party.

Beatrice waves back, even though Diana’s already looking away, before turning to Ava.

"I don’t think it looks that bad." Ava laughs at her, scrunching her nose up at the unforgiving lump that’s supposed to be Diana’s birthday cake. They’d tried, but maybe they weren’t meant to bake.

"It’s terrible, Bea." Ava tucks herself into Beatrice’s chest, arms winding around her waist and holding her in place. Beatrice drops her chin on the top of her head and squeezes her close.

"If we give her the dollhouse last, she might forget about the cake," Beatrice whispers with a chuckle, pulling away when Ava giggles and pushes her shoulder playfully.

"We could ask Shannon and Mary to pick one up?" The doorbell chimes and Ava groans. Another birthday without a cake. What kind of mother can’t bake a birthday cake?

Cheers of greetings drift down the hallway, bouncing and bubbling and bright. Diana abandons the tea party to sprint full speed into Shannon’s legs, nearly knocking them out from under her and sending her crumpling into the ground.

"What’s box?" Diana asks, reaching towards the box in Mary’s hands. Shannon and Mary share a grin before Mary drops to a knee next to Diana.

"It’s your cake, wanna see?"

"I told you we were making a cake, Shannon." Beatrice chides before Mary opens the box to reveal a unicorn shaped cake. Diana squeals and bounces on her toes, looking like she’s seriously debating throttling herself into the cake when Shannon scoops her up.

"I know, but you can’t bake and I guessed Ava wouldn’t be able to either, sorry." She isn’t. She’s laughing, but Beatrice doesn’t care because Diana has a cake now.

Ava catches her eye and Beatrice shakes her head minutely, glancing towards the kitchen. Ava nods and excuses herself to dump the cake into the trash. She barely manages to shut the lid before Mary joins her. Ava pretends to be wiping the counters off, like she didn’t just throw away her and Beatrice’s second pitiful attempt at a cake, and Mary laughs.

"Look, I’ve known Bea since she was fourteen. She can’t bake. It’s sad and it’s hilarious. But you?" Mary sets the cake on the counter and digs through a drawer for birthday candles. "I have to say, I did want to give you the benefit of the doubt. Shannon said you don’t have baking hands though, whatever that means."

"I did not!" Shannon bumps their shoulders before setting Diana down and watching her race back to her tea party. "What I said was that you don’t look like you know how to make a cake."

"That’s not true at all, she said you don’t have baking hands. I swear by it!"

"How does someone who knows how to make a cake look?" Beatrice asks, taking her sister by the shoulders and giving her a soft shake.

"Well, like me. Of course. And Camila and Lilith."

"Lilith can’t bake."

"Well, she looks like she can."

"Lilith started a kitchen fire. She was boiling water and started a fire. Lilith started a fire with water, Shannon." Ava giggles at Beatrice’s frustration, taking her hand and squeezing her fingers three times. Beatrice repeats the pattern.

"Beatrice! I was fifteen! Let it go!" Lilith calls from the kitchen table, earning a scolding remark from Diana about how princesses don��t yell. Lilith’s cheeks burn red and she apologizes, offering Diana a toy cookie as repentance. Diana accepts it and hugs her.

"Nannon, Mary come!" Diana asks, waving them over. Mary grins and drags Shannon out of the room by her hand, offering Diana a curtsy before taking the offered plastic tea cup and seat.

Ava leans onto the counter and watches them complimenting the tea and fake pastries, watches Diana glow with every word, her heart swelling until she fears it might burst. She has to take a deep breath to ease the pressure in her lungs.

"Are you alright?" Beatrice murmurs, pressing into the counter beside Ava. Their shoulders brush, burning and alight where their skin touches. Beatrice is watching her, grounding and pulling Ava from her head. Ava is quiet, watching. Waiting. Waiting for this to fall apart.

This can’t be real. Last year, Ava had cried herself to sleep on Diana’s birthday, after spending most of it alone — just the two of them. Last year, Ava had ruined Diana’s birthday and she’d failed her as a mother. Last year, Ava had thought she would never be able to give Diana a birthday she’d love.

She thought she had to do it all on her own.

But here she is. One year after the worst day of her life. Surrounded by the people who love her. Diana is bright and bubbly and loved. She is so deeply loved that it makes Ava’s eyes burn. It’s all Ava has ever wanted for her baby, people who love without conditions. Love that never gets taken away or asks for anything in return.

Diana has that now.

"Yeah, I’m just - " Ava shrugs, she doesn’t know how to put it into words. Beatrice doesn’t ask her to, she smiles and accepts when Ava curls into her chest, hearts beating in chorus. "Is this real? Are you real?"

"I believe so, yes." She buries her head in Ava’s neck and squeezes her tighter, her warm breath making Ava shiver.

"Ayo, lovebirds!" Something thumps off Ava’s shoulder and bounces to the floor. "Come get your kid, she’s trying to make me eat worm sandwiches!"

"You just threw a plastic croissant at Ava, I think you deserve a few worm sandwiches." Diana giggles at Beatrice’s response, bouncing in her seat.

"I was aiming for your head," Mary mutters, sticking her tongue out at Diana when she tries to put a toy sandwich on her plate.

"Hey! How about we do presents?" Shannon twists in her seat to talk to Beatrice, singsongy and grinning mischievously. "She’s going to love ours. And you are going to hate it."

Shannon lifts Diana from the seat, swooping her around the room making airplane noises. Diana squeals and flaps her arms all the way to the living room. Ava kisses Beatrice’s cheek softly before untangling and leading her out of the room.

Diana is sat in Lilith’s lap with a present wrapped in paper with cartoon animals, she’s pointing to them and naming them wrong. She points to a pig and tells Lilith it’s a dog, a rabbit she calls a cow, a horse she calls a bear. She’s giggling maniacally with each incorrect name.

It takes a little prompting to get her to abandon the game, but eventually they convince her to tear the paper open.

It’s a toy keyboard.

"Wow! That’s - " Ava’s voice is high and tight. "That’s just - wow!"

Diana smiles and pushes it off her lap, sliding to the ground and scampering to the big box in front of Mary. She rips the paper down and wraps the strip around her like a cape, spinning before abandoning it to tear another strip and repeating the action. Gradually, she tears her way through the wrapping and unveils a baby drum set.

"Oh my god, they’re in cahoots." Beatrice’s palm rests on Ava’s bouncing knee, stilling the movement.

"In cahoots? What are you seventy?" Ava curls her fingers over the top of Beatrice’s.

"It’s payback for all the times you stole my clothes." Shannon smirks and wiggles her eyebrows, already ripping through the tape to unpack it.

"Did you guys talk about what you were getting her? Did I miss a meeting? My gift is not within the theme." Camila offers Diana a small gift bag. Diana yanks the tissue paper out and throws it in the air, dancing under it as it falls. She does it again and again until she grows bored. She attempts to climb into the bag before Camila tells her there’s still something in it.

Ava hopes Camila didn’t get her a recorder or a tambourine because she’s not sure she’ll survive if she did.

It is a watercolor set. Oh, thank god.

"Is it?" Diana holds it out to Beatrice, climbing into her lap and listening while she explains it to her.

"Here, let me show you." She takes the cup of water from beside her and slides to the floor with Diana, flipping a paper over and dipping the brush in the water before swirling it in a blue and swiping it across the page. Diana gasps, eyes wide when she turns to Beatrice.

"Wanna try?" Beatrice offers the paintbrush to her and Diana nods, taking it from her like it’s the most precious thing she’s ever received. She jabs it into the paper and turns to Beatrice with a grin, Beatrice nods and Diana does it again, pausing and listening intently while Beatrice explains how to change colors.

Diana makes a picture for everyone, each a blob of colors swirling together until they’re almost a brownish grey. Beatrice asks Diana twice if she wants to open her present from Ava and her. Diana turns her down both times, completely focused on her painting.

Shannon and Mary spend the next hour and a half arguing over how to put the drum set together, Lilith sets up the keyboard and starts to plunk out a melody that earns a cursory glance from Diana before she returns to her art.

Slowly, their guests trickle out, leaving for their own homes with their paintings from Diana. Lilith elects to go with Camila in an attempt to get out of doing the dishes she’d promised to wash. Beatrice doesn’t quite mind.

It isn’t until Diana falls asleep on her paintbrush that Ava even mentions leaving, almost like it hadn’t occurred to her that she wasn’t home.

"Stay. She’s already asleep, you can take the guest room." Beatrice wipes the watercolor from Diana’s face with a damp cloth, careful not to wake her. "I’ll help you move everything to yours in the morning, yeah?"

Ava pretends she doesn’t immediately want to accept the offer, wiggling her shoulders in nonexistent silent debate. When she agrees, Beatrice lights up like a candle, eagerly leading Ava to the guest room where she tucks Diana in carefully. She kisses Diana’s forehead and whispers something Ava can’t make out but it warms her chest regardless.

Ava helps Beatrice clear away the mess of the party. Beatrice smiles at her over the breakfast bar, stacking dishes in the sink while Ava wipes the table. When Ava attempts to start washing the dirty dishes, Beatrice drags her out of the kitchen.

"Lilith can do them when she gets home or in the morning, you sit. Relax. This is a big day for you too." Beatrice takes her place at Ava’s side on the couch.

"Is that so?" Ava taunts, one eyebrow raised when Beatrice turns to her.

"Of course. You made an entire person, Ava. And you kept her alive for two years. That’s not a small thing. You literally created an entire human being two years ago. You made a person that didn’t exist before. Do you not think that’s awe-inspiring?" There’s a light in her words that burns deep beneath Ava’s skin, her voice soft and high while Ava watches her.

Ava wants to deny it. She’s not certain she’s deserving of the way Beatrice is looking at her right now. She’s never thought about it like that, never really considered anything about her pregnancy miraculous or awe-inspiring. It was always something that just was. It was neither good nor bad, it was something that happened to her more than it was anything else.

She loves Diana with everything she has and is, but there are moments that she wonders if her daughter will hate her for the things Ava can’t give her.

"Whether or not you believe me, Ava, you did something miraculous." Ava bites her lip to hide how it trembles, cuts her eyes away so Beatrice can’t see the tears gathering. Beatrice hooks a finger under Ava’s chin and turns her face back slowly, traces the line of her jaw with her thumb. "That deserves celebration too."

Ava doesn’t have the words to respond, she doubts she could formulate a coherent sentence right now even if she tried. Beatrice doesn’t try to force an explanation for the quiet tears that she gathers beneath the pads of her thumbs. She waits, gentle and quiet, while Ava takes a shuddering breath and nods at her.

"So?"

"So." Beatrice waits with the ghost of a smile, eyes sparkling.

"How are we to celebrate?" Ava tries to smile even though her voice trembles and cracks.

"How do you wish to celebrate?" Ava shrugs and Beatrice chuckles. "We can do anything you’d like. As long as it is within the apartment, I don’t think Arson would be a great babysitter."

Arson lifts his head at his name, blinks at her sleepily and flicks his tail. He stretches and bounces across the coffee table, carefully avoiding Diana’s drying artwork, and brushes against Ava. He purrs loudly and curls into her lap, nudging her hand until she scratches behind his ears.

"Can we just - can we be here?" When Ava extends her hand to Beatrice, she accepts it with a nod and presses a soft kiss on the back of it.

Neither talks for a while, Beatrice traces shapes into the inside of Ava’s wrist, little hearts and stars and swirls. She leaves goosebumps in her wake. Beatrice can feel Ava’s heart racing beneath her touch, notices the way she shivers when Beatrice lightly scratches her forearm.

There’s a moment, when Ava’s breath stutters and she glances at Beatrice’s lips and she thinks she might kiss her. Beatrice wants her to kiss her.

But she doesn’t.

Because Diana comes stumbling down the hall dragging her blanket with her thumb tucked between her teeth. She pushes Arson out of Ava’s lap and takes his place, pulling him back once she’s settled. She squeezes him against her chest and he makes a dissenting meow but he doesn’t fight back.

"Happy birthday," Diana whispers to no one in particular around her thumb, dropping her head against Ava’s shoulder. She’s so cute, smiling dopily at Beatrice who brushes her sleep tousled hair out of her face.

"Did you have a good birthday, patinho?" Diana nods and crawls from Ava’s lap to Beatrice’s, dragging poor Arson with her. "Why don’t we let the cat go? Yes?"

Diana pouts but she relinquishes him anyways. He darts out from her embrace only to return a moment later, kneading on Diana’s blanket across her legs. She pats his head and smiles when he nuzzles against her.

Maybe, in another lifetime, this wouldn’t be so difficult. This wouldn’t be so terrifying. Maybe this would be easy and natural and wouldn’t make Ava feel like she’s going to throw up. Maybe it would be as simple as breathing.

But it isn’t now. Because Ava would rather pretend they’re just friends than risk having to explain to Diana why Beatrice isn’t around anymore.

She’s already had one parent walk out on her, Ava doesn’t want to be the reason she loses another.

Find more here!

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ohtobemare · 5 months

Note

Happiest of birthdays to you! Would love to request my man Slider and the prompt “you remembered?!”¹ “what kind of question is that? of course i did!”

Hope you have fun plans for your bday (or at least good VK dreams!)

Alright, nonny. Here it is. The kickoff to my birthday celly. And woof, she was rough. Slider is so hard in all the right ways, of course and I really hope it doesn't take me this long to get through all of these. Enjoy our favorite RIO (sorry, Goose!) and thanks so much for celebrating with me!

Favors

“Sli? Sli baby, you here?”

Ankles all but throbbing as you wobble through the front door in heels, quick eyes skirt the kitchen for any signs of life potentially lurking in the after-5 shadows crisscrossing the tiles of the floor.

Nothing but the quiet hum from the open window and the overhead light on the stove fills the space. Huffing a little breath, the groceries drop to the granite countertop of your island with a hard thunk, overflowing arms aching with the sudden relief.

Tossing keys on the counter and kicking your heels off against the island, cool tile feels miraculous on your feet. Does wonders for the dull flame in your arches as you curl your toes, adjusting to the change. Eyes catching the time on the stove, your hand slips along the granite countertop as you cross the kitchen. Do the mental math.

And that makes you a little more anxious than you were before, hurrying towards the stairs.

Calling for Slider again, you’re not sure where he is. That piece of shit he drives is parked at the curb, just as it had been last night. When Ron had passed out on your couch. He obviously hadn’t bothered leaving, the hood on his pickup was still cold.

You head upstairs, two at a time, surveying the living room from the open banister. TV still, Ron’s once-rumpled blanket from where you’d covered him up folded with clinical care on one of the cushions. His Navy duffle parked by the recliner he’s been calling his since the day you’d moved it in.

Nothingness. It’s there, like a taut wire. Waiting to be plucked, for the butterknife to come and cut the tension like it’s Sunday dinner. Odd that Slider isn’t rumbling around your duplex in your absence—usually he’s doing something. Working out, changing a lightbulb, that one time he’d taken it upon himself to wash baseboards. The man isn’t prone to stagnancy. Even if you insist he relax.

At the top of the stairs, a hit of familiar peach tickles your nose and gives you pause. Wriggling toes into the plush carpet, you hear the running water at the end of the hall. This house is nothing if not held together with paper-thin walls and discount nails. A true product of the 1970s, you’d replaced the carpet last year. Slider had wrangled up some of the boys, beer and home cooked food had brought them around to help lay carpet and new tile.

The neighbors hadn’t been so nosy, or visible, since.

Curiosing your way down the hall in the direction of running water, you slip into the master to find light cutting into the shadows of your bedroom from the on-suite. Fusty shampoo and steam roll from the cracked door, and your lips quirk up into a goofy smile at the little off-key humming.

Some tune you don’t know, but coming from Ron? It’s like front row seats at Billy Joel. Or it might as well be.

Stopping at the door, you gently grab the knob and use your other hand to knock a knuckle against the door. Immediately mute, nothing but the rush of the shower slapping water against the backsplash takes up the space.

Peeking past the door to the mirror hanging over the sink, you can see Ron in the shower. He’s paused, mid-shampoo. Eyes squeezed shut, adorable crow’s feet and all.

“I’m back from the store, Sli,” you check his watch, which has been hanging out on your wrist since you’d snatched it off the nightstand this morning. Resting your head against the door, you twist the ball of your foot against the carpet and gnaw teasingly on your lower lip.

“Yeah?” The titter of a laugh is there. More of a chuckle, really. “Get what you need, baby?”

Baby. It punches low, white-hot. Sends tingles of pleasurable heat; promises all the things he does right buzzing through your fingertips.

Sticking your head through the crack of the door, you smile crookedly at the reflection of him trying to clear the soap from his face. Mirror half fogged over from the heavy steam, something similar rolls through the low of your gut. Pleasant but clawing, devastating but delicious.

And he really is a beautiful creature of a thing—all hard muscle and suntan, there isn’t a part of him that isn’t near to carved bronze. Little more than Icarus flying into a too-near sun, he cuts you at the knees every time he smiles your direction. When his hand takes yours, the atmosphere thins into hardly-there air that’s all too good and impossible to breathe at once.

And that little thing he does, the slow drag of his lips against the line of your jaw, down the soft flesh of your neck to the collarbone? It shakes you all the way down.

Ron Kerner is the glistening sun, you all too thrilled to orbit. A clear northern sky. Endless canvas of midnight sprinkled with the glow of far-off worlds only ever promised in poems and movies and stories, what he does to you is nearly sinful. Little does he know that he grips you in strong, calloused hands that balance so much more than the way he holds your hips, the way he cups your face—you little more than putty in his hands. They hold your world, your heart, your ability to love.

Two years together—two revolutions around the sun—has throttled you into never letting go. Into thinking you can’t exist without the hard planes of him fitting so perfectly against you. He’s a disease you can’t shake, radiation poisoning that corrupts the body and soul; toxic divinity that’s contaminating every realm of your fathomable existence.

Even here, separated by doors and steaming clouds and frosted glass of a shower door that hides all the things that matter, you’re one calculation from drowning in the way he’s smiling crookedly. How his hair curls so beautifully when it’s wet—how rivulets of water carve what feel like unexplored chasms down his breastbone, his pecs, obliques.

Hands dropping from working shampoo through his hair, his little smirk twists when he goes to bite the corner of his bottom lip. He can feel you staring, obviously. And the frosted strip of glass on the door is doing a magnificent job of hiding everything that crosshairs your line of sight. Welded there and unable to move for any amount of collateral known to man, you hardly notice the door moving. Or the fact that you’re squirming.

Until Ron steps forward, head poking through the opening to grin at you, goofily.

“My eyes are up here, gorgeous.” And his wagging brows make you blush. Eyes dragging away to far off places, all conveniently across the bathroom, your bottom lip rolls inward.

Drumming your nails against the back of the door, he snorts at the color lighting up your face. “Well don’t be shy about it, for Christ sake,” teasing is only half of Ron’s game.

Cool eyes find the inferno of yours, the corner of his mouth ticking up a quirk. “Get over here.”

And before you can even breathe, he’s waving his hand for you to come.

For a few beats he doesn’t say anything. You weigh the decision from behind the door as if it's stock and your flat-footed stance behind the door is Wall Street. But you’re burning in all the right places—for a moment, thinking you might be combusting from beneath the collar of your button down shirt.

Because you can’t feel the limp noodles that have conveniently replaced your arms at either of your sides. Legs feel like they’ve disconnected from your body. All you can feel is the pulled-taut hot little feeling between your legs, the way your core is absolutely throbbing in need of the way he’s looking at you.

Fingers curling and uncurling at your sides, you slip through the door. Gently toe it closed. Pressing your ass against the twin sink countertop, your toes flex against the cool tile of the floor. It’s slick in that way that cool tile gets when steam is in the air, and one wrong move will have you skating like a newborn foal.

And suddenly everything about this room is hyperaware, flogging you in deeper living color. The atrocious color of the walls you haven’t repainted; that ugly spot that one painting from your mother was supposed to cover, but sits perpetually at the back of your closet because it’s not your style.

It’s all so here, so alive, as Slider does nothing but hold your attention. Waving you come like a damn siren of a thing and not the Naval aviator you've been pining over since that day you'd seen him at the O-Club.

Fortifying your position, your fingers curl into the granite countertop before a desperate, coy little smile twists your lips. Shaking your head, the throaty chuckle rolling around the back of your throat is a little deeper than you thought possible. And your tongue is thick, clumsy in your mouth over him.

Your eyes dart immediately when he slips further out of the shower, one of his tree-like legs stepping home on the bathmat. Water pours from him like the gates of Sesame have opened, taking with it all moisture from the back of your throat.

Chuckling in disbelief at your stubbornness, he leans out of the shower to reach for you. “What? Don’t trust me?” How his brow lifts conspiratorially confirms that he knows, and you lift to your toes to lean back from his grabbing hand, farther over the sink. “Oh come on, gorgeous—”

“—you get over here, Kerner. Away from the shower.” Your eyes drop to the center of his abdomen, more telling than you'd like to be.

You heave yourself onto the counter with a heavy plop, planting heels against the cupboards beneath, the heavy oak a little rougher on your feet than you remember. Then, crooking a finger at him, your chin lifts as your eyes drop to a lusty half mast.

His face might as well be a landing strip the way his brows take off, and you chuckle when his tongue so visibly fills the pocket of his lower lip.

“What? You don't trust me?”

Return smile slow, “Not even for a second,” has your brows bouncing suggestively. That tight little snake that’s been slipping low down your spine curls into a tight coil at the base of your stomach, poised. Waiting. Like springs; catapults that clamp metric tonnes of aircraft home to the cold blue surface of carriers. Waiting for the greenlight. Of flight. Of going.

And like the crack of a whip, Slider slaps open the shower door with a wet palm. Stepping out, his hand drags through the rivers of water cascading down the glass to the floor, like life itself depends on finding paydirt.

In a breath he’s suddenly standing between your legs, water from every crevice of his finely-hewn body pouring to the floor. Fingers curled into the granite at either side of your thighs, the running shower that’s wasting water by the gallons disappears from thought.

The only thing tangible is Slider’s hot breath between the two of you. His cock, heavy between the yummy, God-ordained V of his hips. The way his breathing is just a little ragged when he steps between your legs makes you forget your name; one of his thick wet hands sliding home to your hip.

Fingers twisting in the Rayon of your shirt, his other comes to brush your bangs from your forehead, playing. Exploring. Investigating how they whisp away, how it sends shivers down your spine.

Even two years under Ronnie’s spell, you still can’t breathe when his eyes move from yours to your mouth. Catching your bottom lip between your teeth, you attempt to steady the heart that’s practically pulsating between your ribs. Any second you expect it to jump into his awaiting hand—little’s changed since the first time he’d kissed you in the front seat of your Pontiac, tasting like beer and chapstick and cologne that didn’t match his personality. Your heart had beat just as quickly then.

Jury’s out on when it would ever not.

Slider leans forward a little to brush his lips against yours. And you try to kiss him, breathless and head spinning, but he pulls back a little, smiling. Angling to skim his mouth along your jaw, his nose brushes the apple of your cheek. Wet, and his like-steel grip on your thigh has left a wet handprint in the denim of your Levi’s. But you don’t care, not really.

Because it’s so hot, so perfect the way his fingers skim to the sensitive juncture of your legs. To that whiny, needy little spot that aches just so in way’s only God Himself could smile at.

Goosebumps chase up your arms as his fingers curl into the meat of your thigh. Fingertips brush up the curve of your side to the collar of your shirt as he works thick, inferno kisses to that spot he knows you love. It’ll be all kinds of red and blue by tomorrow, and it will all but stand up and demand your best full-coverage base, but that’s a tomorrow problem.

Right now all you can feel is the magnetism in the base of your gut, the twitch of fighting the urge to close your thighs around his waist and pull him close.

His lips drag back to your mouth, hovering. Tasting, teasing. And he smells like shampoo, like peach and rain and that musk that only men seem to ever have on their skin. Nose brushing the end of yours lightly, his lips curl into quicksilver as he takes your hand, laces his fingers through yours, and guides it to the middle of his chest.

All but shaking, you gnaw at the inside pocket of your cheek. “Smile for me, sweetheart,” and the throatiness of it rips a breathless little whimper from the back of your throat, his fingertips brushing down the column of your neck. Head tipping back as your eyes flutter closed, toes burning against the rough oak cabinets like you can feel every splinter of rough wood.

“Smile for Slider on your birthday, hm?”

And that punches your gut like nothing ever has. Head snapping forward, you can’t resist—your mouth crashes against his like steel punching steel, teeth knocking together in a way that makes neither of you pause but pulls a surprised grunt from him. Legs lift to wrap around his waist. Pull him forward, suck him in.

Your fingers memorize every swell and curve of hard muscle as they trace up his arms, across his collarbones. Until all at once your arms slip around his neck, pulling him down, flush against your chest. His fingers skip along the hem of your shirt, dangerous. Possessive. It’s nearly treason.

“You remembered,” between lazy kisses that pull and push in all the right ways, your smile grows. And his fingers slip up your back lightly, fisting the material of your shirt as he holds you. Dips you forward with gentle pressure until you’re chest-to-chest. Heartbeat to heartbeat. Until you’re looking up into lusty eyes beneath your lashes, hardly able to breathe.

“‘Course I remembered,” his brow furrows a little, like he’s a bit confused by the question, “what kind of guy would I be if I forgot my babygirl’s birthday?” Ownership is definitely a thing between the two of you–-a bedroom kink that snaps you just short of a rubber band. Curls heat down your spine like its smoke in the air.

Biting your lower lip, you smile at him before your nose wrinkles a little. “You’re bad for me, Ronnie,” his lips curl up into a grin as he chuckles against your mouth, a singular finger tracing the line of your shoulder blade beneath your shirt.

“And you’re too gorgeous to be twenty-nine,” it's almost whining. Taking your bottom lip between his teeth, his brows wag a little when you blush up at him. Pulling away, piglet cheeks warm under his attention as you arch back into his hands, the front of your shirt stains wet from his chest.

And arching back only snags his attention. Ducking to press an open-mouth kiss to the pulse in your neck, his teeth lightly drag against your skin when he sucks. Hard. Twisting a delicious little hiss that tastes like heat on your tongue, he chuckles. Your finger playing through the curls on his chest sends goosebumps across his skin, you feel them pebble beneath your fingertips. Droplets on his skin have fanned cold, but the room is still swirling with team from the nearly overwhelming thunder of the shower.

“Feel any older?” His murmur is thick against soft skin. Very suddenly nothing about him is chilled–he may as well be cut from volcanic rock.

Throaty hum chasing any reasonable response from your head, his hand lifts to the back of your hair, fingers searching for a handful of hair before the light tug drops your head back.

Pain is momentary before it bleeds into warm heat that lights up your nerves, sends blood ripping through your ears like a stoked locomotive on fire and threatening the rails. Chest rising and falling in tandem with his, your fingers curl into the damp curve of his bicep, pulling him a little closer.

“'Only as old as you feel, Ron,” your tongue skates your bottom lip, eyes darting over his shoulder to consider the shower, “And I don’t feel very old. Not yet, anyway,” head canting to the side, his other hand cards through your hair. Looking hungry, looking very engaged with what you’re saying, your smile grows. Sweetly, innocently.

“I think I’ve got some miles left in me. Don’t you?”

It’s taking visible effort for him to stay composed, you can tell. It’s in the twitch of his fingers, the little tick of muscle in his jaw. Ron has never, in two years, been very good at keeping a poker face—the man is too animated. Too much of a card to keep any secrets, and today he’s as much Ron Kerner as you’ve always known him to be.

But the push and pull of your body against his working off your shirt is uncoordinated and hot, too many steps to even fathom as that familiar twisting serpent hums in the base of your belly. In the perfect, God-designed V of your legs, the damn thing.

And Slider is nothing if not easily entertained—it takes little to no effort for his attention to drop to the growing cut of your shirt as one by one, your fingers work at buttons like they are hardly there.

Watching to the point of huffing, Slider resolves to just rip the garment the rest of the way off, tossing it away into the abyss this on-suite has become. His disregard–the nerve. It was your favorite shirt. A white and gray little striped thing that you got at Bloomingdales, on sale. Normally couldn’t afford.

But Ron hasn’t ever really cared about clothes, not in the heat of the moment—he’s replaced every garment he’s destroyed. Bless him and his generous soul, you’re willing to bet a week’s salary he’s prepared to buy you three more. Had planned to rip that one off of you as soon as you’d kissed him goodbye to leave for the damn store.

Chest to chest, your skin nearly ripples with feel-good bumps that make you shiver—it’s the only thing keeping you boots on the ground. And he wastes exactly zero seconds—his fingers are nearly lithe with the button of your jeans, laying them open with a mere pop of his thumb.

And all too quickly, his hands are in yours, fingers interlaced as he steps back from the sink, tugging you with him.

“You think so, huh?” You’re nearly a full foot shorter than Slider, a fact he’s never failed to bring to your attention. Lowering to lazily play with your bottom lip, his smile grows as he steps back a few more paces, and now you can all but feel the spray of the shower dance across your skin. “How about putting money where your mouth is, baby?”

And like a crack of lightning, both of you are suddenly beneath near-scalding water, chest to chest with your back pressed hard against the backsplash.

“You hate shower sex, Sli,” never mind saturated jeans weighing heavy on your legs, and how truly awful that feels—you couldn’t wriggle out of them if you’d even tried, “Why would you—” Boxed in between either of his arms, there’s little more between you than him.

And there’s nowhere to run, pulse of hot water lighting up your skin like fire. Another fistful of your hair has your head tipped back against the tile, his fingers slipping through the droplets clinging to your skin.

“But you don’t,” he shakes his head once, saturated curls all but bouncing with the effort before he rakes them back with a smooth hand, “and today is about you, gorgeous,” hands falling to either of your hips, he guides you forward until his dick presses softly to your thigh.

"And besides," In a sweet, hardly-ordinary-for-Slider nose-to-nose kiss, his smile becomes loose for all of a few seconds. Leaves you breathless, dizzy. Stupid—more stupid than you want to feel on your birthday. Almost conspiratorial.

“—my birthday is in a couple weeks."

#ron slider kerner #ron kerner x reader #top gun #top gun 1986 #top gun imagines #slider x reader #ron slider kerner x reader #mare's top gun 29 birthday celebration #writing prompts #prompts #asks #ask box #anonymous #anon ask #ask mare #answered asks

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disgruntledkittenface · 5 months

Text

annual* writing self evaluation

thank you @kingsofeverything and @nouies for tagging me!

1. List of works published this year:

I Choose You

when we're finished saying nothing

count me in

too into you

routine surveillance

you wanna be on top?

Suddenly Last Summer

if i'm being honest

it's a holidate

Red

2. Work you are most proud of (and why):

Suddenly Last Summer. I let myself let go and have fun and write exactly what I wanted, and I love the way it turned out.

3. Work you are least proud of (and why):

I hate this questionnnn

4. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

I love this bit from Red, the fic I wrote for @crinkle-eyed-boo birthday:

When Harry turns his head to bite Louis’ earlobe, Louis buries his face in Harry’s hair, breathing him in. He detects a faint whiff of smoke, and frowns.

“Did you smoke?”

Harry presses his face into Louis’ neck, nodding.

“Oh, no,” Louis says, rubbing a soothing hand over Harry’s bare back. “I know you hate to smoke without me.”

Louis barely hears the whisper as Harry says, “I’m sorry,” since he doesn’t bother to lift his lips from Louis’ skin. But then Harry says it again, louder, following it with a kiss against Louis’ neck. And then again, over and over, leaving apologies and kisses against Louis’ skin like he wants them to stay, as permanent as the ink of their tattoos. Louis sags against the wall, trusting Harry to hold his weight, as the relief finally hits him. Harry hates apologizing, even when he knows he’s wrong. And Louis can’t even remember who was wrong, and more than that, he doesn’t care. He just wants Harry back. He doesn’t need Harry to beg, and it feels like that’s exactly what he’s doing right now.

“Baby,” Louis says at last. “Stop, stop it. I’m sorry.”

A tear slips down Louis’ neck, and he wrinkles his brow in confusion. He hasn’t cried in several minutes, a record for him today, if not every day since the breakup. But then a sob wracks Harry’s body, his grip tightening on Louis as his shoulders shake.

“Oh, baby,” Louis says, petting Harry’s hair. “No, baby, I’m sorry. Please don’t cry.”

“I just missed you,” Harry chokes out. When he draws back, it’s Louis’ turn to smooth away his tears. “I missed you so fucking much, Lou.”

“I missed you, too,” Louis says, resting his forehead against Harry’s. “We’ve never been this stupid before, have we?”

5. Share or describe a favorite review you received:

I really loved getting both @kingsofeverything and @allwaswell16 reactions to Suddenly Last Summer! Lauren theorized via voice note and I was glued to my email while Anitra commented as she read, and it all just felt really good!

6. A time when writing was really, really hard:

I'm not going to lie, writing was not that hard this year. I think I was just picking things I really wanted to write for myself. And it was a good coping mechanism when things were hard in my personal life. But honestly, it kind of feels like dumb luck because I've definitely had my share of writing block.

7. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you:

I don't know where the itch to write dark Harry in routine surveillance came from!! That took me by surprise, and I loved doing it.

8. How did you grow as a writer this year:

I think just by writing for myself. I always wish I had different stats on my fics, but I can't write with trying to please people in mind.

9. How do you hope to grow next year:

I don't know! Keep writing for myself and being the weirdo who likes to do lots of different things.

10. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

I am fortunate to have a lot of support!! This year, I really noticed the lovely comments I was getting from @nouies <3

11. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year:

Yes! Just about everything that the cat does in if i'm being honest has been done by one of my new cats. It's my love letter to them.

12. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

I don't think I have much new wisdom. I always say pay attention to the writing advice that works for you, and ignore the rest. I think telling a story and making people feel something matters more than the technique, but I also say that as someone who has spent a lot of time on technique so don't listen to me if you don't want to!

13. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

I want to write a girl direction When Harry Met Sally AU and make it VERY GAY and I'm excited about it!!

14. Tag three writers whose answers you’d like to read. ;)

@neondiamond @homosociallyyours @absoloutenonsense

*All answers should be about works published in 2023

#zarry omegaverse #harry/chris pine #fbi man larry #zouis au #an american tragedy au #narry cat lesbian au #gryles xmas au #red (kim's version)#whms lesbian au

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honeysucklebuttons · 1 year

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Any Gonta hc's involving bugs? I'd love to hear them if you'll share! I'm curious what you got c:

Hello! Thank you for your patience, I've finally had some time to think about this wonderful question!! <3

_ In general, Gonta is especially protective of the bugs that have bad reputations. He loves and respects all of the amazing life forms out there, but there's something about them that he relates to, whether he realizes it or not. These misconceptions and fear of "gross" or "scary-looking" creatures that could be aggressive if provoked, with maybe a bite or sting or a disease inside them... well, he knows what that feels like to be seen on such a surface level. He's extremely wary of letting other people handle his own bugs in this category for this reason, until he's really truly sure that they'll be handled safely.

_ Some days it feels like he has an exoskeleton, because of the way the rain falls off of his shape, how kind words can bounce off and he feels like he has to show the side of him that won't waver. Some days he wishes he had one, because skin is easy to tear and bruise and blush, and oh, how it gives him away. But having bones on the inside is good, too.

_ I've mentioned before that Gonta sings a lullaby to his bugs every night, some tune he made up or learned while he was lost. (Maybe he managed to learn how to make certain bug sounds!!) This is true for both his bugs at work and at home! He might add words if there are people around that he doesn't mind singing in front of.......

_ Not really a hc, but please, if you will, imagine Gonta talking to baby bugs in a baby-talking voice, like most people do with pets. He doesn't use it with the adults, though - they deserve to be talked to like adults, after all!

_ Gonta building fun enclosures!! (I'm thinking about people with pet jumping spiders, specifically this one person who made their spider a miniature cat tree to explore for enrichment.) He knows what they need, and he can communicate with them to make their short life spans much more exciting! (Setting up tea parties with things they can eat; having an indoor garden area for the pollinators; etc)

_ There are many reasons that Gonta tears up or cries when his bugs are concerned. Celebrating an unexpectedly long life span, happy birthday!! A fight breaking out that he couldn't stop, between bugs that should have been just fine together... A new clutch of babies are hatching!! Oh, none of them made it... Having a staring contest with someone who follows his every movement!! A funeral for someone he's had a long time... Matchmaking a compatible match, they seem very happy!! An accident happened with the enclosure, or the food, or a person mishandled one of them... At the end of the day, sometimes just thinking about bugs is enough to do it!!!! And sometimes, "IT'S JUST SO TINY" is as valid a reason as any :D

_ Gonta is That Guy at bug conventions- people whisper excitedly about him as he passes by, ask for photos, and more than once, he's had someone come up to him and ask anything from, "Would you like to hold my [species name]?! I'd be so honored if you did!!" to "Would you like to be featured in our publication? Your work proceeds you!" He's getting used to it, slowly.

_ Gonta talks to himself. Gonta also talks to bugs and other creatures. It's hard to tell who he's talking to if he's the only person around, sometimes...

_ He loves bug art and tattoos and, while he might not have any tattoos himself, he ogles politely when people show him theirs! At least a few people have asked to get his scientific drawings done as tattoos and he's always initially like "why tho????" until he sees it and then it's "!!!!!!!!!!!" hehe

Okay I think I'll stop here for now.......... thank you for the wonderful Gonta daydreams, I hope these are what you were looking for! (Hopefully you didn't want specific ones like... how does Gonta feel about ladybugs or something lol) (he loves them, next question) <3 <3 <3

#bugs #danganronpa #gonta gokuhara #headcanons #ask meh #anonymous #drv3

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kaunis-sielu · 2 years

Text

A Payment

You’re clenching your teeth so hard that you’re surprised you haven’t broken a tooth, or your jaw. Fire practically races through your veins you’re so furious, how could he?

“You will do this.” Your father says coldly, “you will do this without complaint.” A single tear slips down your face but it’s not sorrow, it’s rage. You don’t say anything to your father, he doesn’t even bother looking up when you turn away from him. “You will make yourself presentable.” He instructs as your hand touches the door handle you pause for a moment, taking a deep breath so that you don’t snap, you push the door open and storm past the two men that are waiting just outside.

“Queenie?” Lance says and you don’t look at him as you continue to your rooms.

“Don’t.” You snap, Lance has been on your six for long enough to know that when you’re in a rage like this it’s best to just leave you alone.

He does follow you through your father’s house and to the rooms that you always stay in when you’re here. You hate staying here, you feel like you’re suffocated all the time, that you’re back to being that seventeen year old girl who is powerless in her father’s empire. Not that you actually have any power, which is something that your father has made perfectly clear in the last ten minutes.

Fuck Grant. He should have to pay for his own mistakes but since he’s your older half brother and a male he gets to just skate by and will get to run the empire some day.

You, you’re just a pawn.

You’re not a queen.

You shove your door open and start throwing things into your suitcase. You hadn’t bothered to bring much, you’d been hopeful that this little meeting with your father wouldn’t be long. It hadn’t, but it also hadn’t gone the way that you’d hoped. You’d hoped that since moving away from New York to Boston your father would let you have the independence that you so badly craved. You hadn’t lived under his roof since your 18th birthday specifically so that you could have that freedom. For nearly fifteen years you’d lived off on your own, away from New York, away from your father’s iron fist and the life of a mob boss’s daughter.

“Queenie? What’s going on?” Lance asks softly and you sigh heavily, he does have the right to know considering he’s been your constant companion since you were thirteen.

“I’ve been sold to Steve Rogers.” You tell him so softly that you’re not sure that he’s heard you. At least you’re not sure he’s heard you until he lets out a low growl.

“I’m sorry, you’re gonna have to run that one by me again.”

“My dear brother has run up a rather large debit with Rogers, who has agreed to let that jackass live for a share in the business. Apparently, my father thinks that I count as a share in the business. So, in less than twelve hours I’ll be off your hands for good and under his protection, or whatever he wants to do with me I guess.” You tell Lance dropping down onto the bed, a shirt in your hands. “I should’ve never come back Lance.”

“You didn’t have a choice Q.” He tells you crossing the room and dropping down onto the bed next to you. Lance has been there for all of it. Since your mom died when you were thirteen and your father had decided that you needed a bodyguard to control you under the guise of keeping you safe. You’d fought at first, especially since Lance was only a few years older than you, but once the two of you had come to an agreement, that he wouldn’t try to boss you around unless it was life or death and you’d cooperate with him, you’d become fast friends.

“I hate him. I hate him so much.” You say before the tears start to fall and Lance gently pulls you to him so that you can let yourself grieve.

“I’m sorry Queenie.” He says into your hair, “I won’t leave you though, not unless you tell me to. I’m your guy until the canary sings baby.” He says and you laugh through your tears.

“Thanks Lance but you’re part of my father’s company, if he says you stay you have to stay.”

“I can leave Queenie, the only reason that I haven’t is because of you.”

“You can pay the dues?” You ask looking up at him in surprise, “Does Bobbi know?”

“Yea, she knows the deal. I’m your shadow, on your six no matter what. Where you go we go. Even if that means paying the dues to your father and then joining Rogers Company.” You don’t know what to say, you love Lance like the big brother you wish you had, not the piece of shit that you’ve got, and to know that he cares for you as much as you do for him is heartwarming.

“Thanks Lance.” You murmur and he gives your shoulders a squeeze.

“When do you have to be ready?”

“Father said seven, apparently Rogers is coming over to pick me up and sign some paperwork or something then I’m to go with him.”

“Alright, so we have three hours. What do you want to do?”

“I have to get ready. Pack, shower, look presentable and shit.” You say with another long sigh, “This sucks.”

“Yea, but you weren’t happy here so maybe you’ll be happy with Rogers.”

“I was happy in Boston.”

“You won’t be at your father’s beck and call anymore.”

“I’ve traded one golden cage for another Lance. I know you’re trying to help but right now I just need to be sad so when it’s time I can be fury herself.” He nods his understanding and leaves the room. You get everything packed except for the black dress you’re planning on wearing. It’s got a scoop neck and long sleeves and falls to just above your knees. You’ll wear a pair of black heels and wear your hair up with some dramatic make up. You’ll look a Queen, not just little Queenie who is a pawn in the games men play, you’ll demand his respect.

At quarter to seven someone knocks on your door. When you pull the door open you’re not surprised to see Adia, your father’s everything woman. You’re fairly certain they’ve been sleeping together for a while but that’s never been confirmed.

“Your father said to sign this.”

“What is it?” You ask taking the paper that she’s passed you. She doesn’t answer and when you glance at the top you see the words ‘marriage license’ and you gape at it. “I’m not signing this.”

“Either you sign it or I do it for you. Trip will confirm that you signed it either way.”

“You’re such a bitch.” You sneer but Adia just laughs.

“What’s it going to be Queenie?”

“Go to hell.” You slam the door back in her face but she shoves it open before you can get the chance to lock it and snatches the marriage license from your hands.

“Thank you for your cooperation.” She smirks before forging your signature on the document and flouncing away with Trip on her tail. If you were going to kill someone you’d start with Adia.

The next knock on your door comes at five to seven. When you open the door this time it’s Lance.

“Your father wants you downstairs.” He says, his eyes are soft and when he sees the panic flit through yours he takes a deep breath, one that you copy. Then you straighten your spine, lift your chin and go downstairs. Steve and his men aren’t here yet, your father and Grant wait each with a drink in hand.

“You will say nothing but that you agree to this do you understand me?” You father warns.

“What if I don’t?” You sneer, he won’t kill you not now, you’re too valuable.

“We’ll send Lance home to Bobbi in pieces.” Your only weakness and he knows it.

“I hate you.”

“Watch your tongue little sister.”

“Rot in hell Grant.” Grant goes to respond when your father cuts him off with a hissed,

“Enough.” Moments later Adia walks into the room.

“They’re here.” She says, her eyes only on your father, god you hate everyone in this stupid family.

“Thank you Adia.” She gives him a sweet smile then goes back out the door to collect your new leash holder.

When the door opens again you wait with your heart in your throat until he walks in, tall and strong, light brown hair and bright blue eyes. Those eyes land on you dragging down your body and a small smirk graces his lips.

What an asshole.

Tag list:

@andahugaroundtheneck @connie326 @also-fangirlinsweden @lumar014 @loving-life-my-way @pagina16ps @emdying @dumblani @valsworldofcreativity @blackwidownat2814 @sky0401 @dontbescaredtosingalong @abschaffer2

#steve rogers x reader #Steve rogers x reader au #steve rogers au #mob boss!steve #mob boss au #mob boss steve rogers #mobster au #a payment story

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prideofcelestia · 1 year

Text

❝ reincarnation ❞

notes -> this is my piece for leviathan's birthday collaboration 2023. the prompt is 'reincarnation'

i had a lot of fun with this collab. everyone worked really hard and it was a beautiful feeling to work with people who love the game and levi. thank you everyone for the support and effort you put!

happy birthday, levi!!! thank you for being my beacon of hope during bleak times. you are such an amazing otaku. you give me courage to love the things i do ♡

contains tw -> angst, mentions of war, mentions of death, angst with a happy, hopeful ending.

leviathan x gender neutral reader

Levi jumped, a magazine lying at his feet.

“Ivel-chan was reincarnated as a slime in this life and she will have her revenge!”

He remembered crying buckets last week when they had killed her off. So what if she was a side character? In his heart, she was brighter than the protagonist who only gave fan service these days. At least Ivel-chan had character!

The door to his room flung over. Lucifer peeked inside, his eyes glimmering with sadistic enthusiasm. The twins, who were only toddlers, rested in baby clasps, one on his back, one in the front.

“Levi, dinner has been ready for ten minutes now. Do you want to come to the table or be fed right here?”

“Eep! I-I am coming.”

༺☆༻

“Mammon, don’t play with your food. Asmo, put the mirror down. Satan, don’t glare at your food,” Lucifer chided before feeding a happy Beel.

“Levi, remember that you have to show [Name] around the neighbourhood.”

Levi groaned because he liked staying indoors, “Why do I have to do it?”

“Because their family just shifted in yesterday and [Name] is the same age as you. So as good," Lucifer put emphasis, making Levi shudder, "neighbours, we must do our duty.”

༺☆༻

Seeing you for the first time made Levi feel butterflies in his stomach. You seemed someone out of his memory but that somehow made you feel more real than ever. Every word of protest he had been repeating to himself till then disappeared.

He has had crushes before, both reel and real but it felt different this time. It was as if he knew you from somewhere, and not in a I-have-seen-you-before kind of way but in a I-know-you-well kind of way. It made him feel uncomfortable. He felt violated, as if you could see right through him. He might not be too difficult to read, given that he was nothing more than a yucky otaku but he still had some secrets he wanted to keep safe and your vibe was completely off.

“Do I know you?” you asked, feeling a knot in your stomach that you could not justify.

The idea of letting a stranger show you around a new neighbourhood made you anxious, but the feeling that dominated you right now was curiosity, and surprisingly, interest.

༺☆༻

Levi wasn't that bad. He actually did a good job showing you the places that mattered. The arcade, the stores where the best instant ramen was to be found, the aquarium, and… an anime cafe, too. The last one quite surprised you.

You started hanging out together, mostly because you had become acquainted with him a little, and he seemed fun. He held the same opinion about you and made plans together, although all of it was in his room, playing games.

It felt as if you had lived those exact moments several times with him. Every time he leaned against you during an intense gaming session and apologised, or when he offered you new ramen flavours to try, you would be hit with a memory from a time unknown.

Even though your mind was foggy, you knew that the places you pictured him in were more beautiful than your memory could produce. To add colour to mystery, he was in some sort of an angel cosplay. It all felt really bizarre but it made you think about him more than should be considered healthy.

In his turn, Levi felt guilty that he just couldn't get you out of his mind. He was supposed to be a good friend to you. Wasn't it betraying you if he was, what he believed it to be, falling in love with you?!

༺☆༻

The dreams followed soon. You could neither understand the significance nor discuss it with someone to come to a conclusion.

Those felt disconnected and unreal and you kept mixing the details in your head, not to mention the haunted look Levi had the day after you got one of the dreams.

One day, you decided to take him into your confidence. Slowly but firmly.

You said casually, “Levi, why do you look so tired today?”

He blinked and looked frightened, “Huuuu-? Me?? We-Well, there's something on my m-m-mind. I didn't know how to t-tell you this. I've been having strange dreams these days. I got one last night.”

You stopped in your tracks abruptly to turn towards him. He felt hot under your intense gaze.

“Wh-Why are you looking at m-m-me like that?”

“It’s just,” you began, extremely calm and intrigued, “I have been having dreams that I can’t explain for a while too. Maybe we should talk.”

༺☆༻

“Is this the place?” you called out to Levi after reaching the top of the hill.

The poor guy had been running to keep up with you. Presently, he sat down to rest. Once he could breathe well, he looked around.

There were a few trees scattered around. Wild grass and dandelions had spread there for a good while, lending a weathered yellow look to the place.

It was hauntingly beautiful in your eyes.

“Y-Yeah, this is the place I saw in my dr-dreams. I have been too afraid to come here alone,” Levi said, almost breathless.

The place seemed to talk to him too.

You explored the place while Levi was content with glancing around from his spot.

A sense of nostalgia washed over you. When you glanced back at him, you knew that he felt the same.

On walking around, you came across a small pond that seemed to draw you in.

That's when you saw something shining between the rocks.

After nudging the rocks aside, you found a locket there. It must have been a pretty colour once but now it was rusted and impossible to open.

You didn't know why you hid it so quickly when you heard Levi calling out for you.

Maybe you needed time to think and figure it out yourself first.

༺☆༻

You couldn't put the matter aside for later. The object seemed to call out to you so you put the controller down and turned towards Levi.

“Listen, I picked something up from that place.”

You pulled the locket out and showed it to your friend.

His eyes grew as large as saucepans, “Wh-What do you mean you just randomly picked it up? It could be bad, REALLY b-bad! We still don’t know what those dreams mean!”

You sighed and motioned it towards him, “But isn’t this better than to just speculate?”

He croaked, “The dreams make me uncomfortable… the place… I feel like I have been there before.”

You inched closer to him.

“I understand. Don't worry, I am here with you.”

He stared at you before his lips finally curved up in a smile. “Thank you. You are my true friend, my best friend even!”

Then he shrugged his shoulders, “I guess this is what a protagonist would do. Who am I to stop you? Let's see if it does anything.”

When he touched the locket in your hand, everything around grew dark.

༺☆༻

You were transported to a place beautiful beyond expectations. A strong, shaky hand wrapped around your shoulder, surprising you. A quick glance revealed that it was Levi. He was wearing pure white robes and there was a halo floating on his head. You wanted to laugh and tease him but you couldn’t move.

“I love you, [Name],” he said. The pain in his voice and the fire in his eyes took you aback. “I-I promise that I will pr-protect you in the war.”

What war?

Your mouth seemed to have a mind of its own. Your hand intertwined with his and you found yourself smiling while your veins coursed with fear. “I love you too, Levi. I will not let any harm come to you. Forever, remember?”

“Yes, fo-forever,” he spoke shyly but there was a smile on his face.

༺☆༻

The scene shifted. You were in armed combat with an extremely angry looking woman.

Damn! She was skilled. Every time she swung her spear, you thought that you were about to die, but your body moved meticulously to avoid the attacks.

“[Name], are you fine?” Levi screamed from somewhere.

The female angel raised her eyebrows and showed you a nasty smile before pointing her spear in the direction of Levi’s voice. Your eyes widened as you turned around only to find him busy commanding his army.

He would notice the spear too late! You launched yourself in front of him just before the fatal blow.

“[Name]!”

The poison flowed through your body with vigour, making you fall in and out of consciousness. Levi caught you just as you were about to give up.

With his features contorted with rage, he turned towards the female angel. She smiled triumphantly.

"SOLDIERS!" Levi bellowed. "Attack her!"

The woman got her spear ready and took charge while Levi's army flew past Levi at top speed.

The legion of angels he had been fighting looked on with hope.

The leader of the opposition commanded in a muffled tone, “Attack [Name] together while Leviathan is distracted. That way he will lose his intention to fight.”

Someone put a dagger through Levi's back but despite not understanding the source of the pain, he shielded you with his body. He prioritised you over his own life.

"Soldiers! Protect [Name]!"

It was too late. His eyes felt heavy owing to the poison in the dagger. He couldn't even see where his sworn angels were for the last time or who had been his nemesis in the end.

You both fell together. If you couldn't be alive together, then you two would be together in death.

༺☆༻

“I wish we had a normal life together. Then, we wouldn’t have had to live like outcasts,” Levi whispered when he saw you struggling to keep your eyes open. “As long as I had a chance to live with you, I was happy being an outcast. It seems that our time is up now.”

Levi cried, not because of his condition, but to see life draining from your eyes slowly. “I-I am the happiest angel that’s about to die, [Name]. I am sorry I couldn’t protect you in this life.”

A tear ran down your cheek, “I am sorry too for breaking my promise. I couldn't be with you forever. I couldn't protect you in the end either… I hope we meet again, Levi. I will love you in every lifetime.”

Your hands were intertwined, a locket in your grasp. A locket that enclosed your happiest memory together.

༺☆༻

The flashback ended and you both came back to your senses.

“Ouch!” you yelled and tried to pull your hand back. Levi had it in a tight grasp.

On seeing the fear etched on his face, you got quiet and took a deep breath. It had all felt so surreal.

“What just happened?” you murmured, the full burden of the flashback just setting in.

He looked at your entwined hands and noticed the absence of the locket. He felt a pang in his heart. He only knew that it had been important once but he didn't understand how. Surely it was no merch so why did he care so much?!

“I th-think it was the locket," he blurted out. "When we bo-both touched it, we finally saw the… the entire dream.”

A thoughtful silence filled the room.

You whispered, “I don’t think it was a dream.”

You squeezed his hand gently before looking at him with bated breath.

His lower lip quivered, “I don’t think it was a dream either.”

He turned his gaze towards you. His grip tightened, “D-Did I ever tell you that I am glad we met? I'm happy that you're not a dream. I want to keep knowing you, to make more memories with you. Will you let me?”

༺☆༻

Two people, seated in a small room, forgot the game they had been playing and instead glanced at each other at the moment. Their eyes held tenderness and the advent of new love.

The vast world danced with endless possibilities for their future. No moment was wasted as they decided their own future, unsullied by their past but still keeping their spirit alive.

It was a life they wanted and that was good enough.

#obey me #obey me x reader #gender neutral reader #gender neutral mc #obey me x mc #obey me!#shion script #obey me scenario #obey me leviathan #leviathanbday2023 #leviathan x reader #leviathan x you #leviathan x mc #obey me levi #leviathan avatar of envy #obey me imagines #i feel like i could have added something more or done a better job ;;;;

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jongho-my-beloved · 10 months

Text

The Incident

Heyy I’m Moon! This is the first fic I’ve written in a very long time so bear with me, but I hope if you read it you enjoy it. This fic is called The Incident because it is based off true events from a night out with my friend, just tweaked to make my delusions come to life. This is gonna be maybe one or two more parts, so there’s not too much going on in this chapter besides set up. Pls forgive me for any errors I wrote this in my notes app. Either way I hope you enjoy it and look forward to more writing from me in the future!!

Special thanks to @yeonjuns-beanie who encouraged me to make my delusions into a fic and for being the best friend ever.

Wonwoo X Female Reader

Word Count: 5.9k words

Warnings: Alcohol/Alcohol consumption, Vaping (mentioned literally once), some awkward flirting.

Your keys jangle in the lock as you open the front door, elated to be home after the shit show you just went through at work. Mrrow! The little ball of fluff greets you immediately in her tiny voice, stretching before prancing over to rub up against your legs.

“Hi my baby.” You smile feeling the stress of your last shift slowly seep out as you scratch behind her ears. “Did you get some good naps in today?”

Mow!!

“I wish I was you.” You speak as if you’re having a conversation with one of your roommates, but judging by the stillness of sound they don’t seem to be home. “Come on my love, let’s get you some dinner.”

Mrrph!

Maybe it was a little weird to speak to your animals the way you would a human, but this is your baby, and at least she responds. The kibble clatters into the bowl as she circles you, biting your ankle impatiently when you space out trying to plan for the rest of your evening. “Hey! Be patient it’s right here.” You announce setting the food down as she goes to town.

You should text Lorraine and make sure she’s still down for your plans tonight, which you’re 90% sure she is… but that 10% always gets to your mind. Pulling up your messages you click on the contact reading Wifey 😈💕.

Y/N: Hellooooo loml 🫶🫶🫶🫶 are you still down to get messy and kiss in the club later 🤭

You and your friends are always flirting, this was just your way of asking if you were still going out tonight. It’s just how you express your endearment to each other, but also probably the reason why people seem so intimidated to approach you when you go out together.

Wifey 😈💕: I’ve been waiting all week to get a smooch in, of course I’m still down 🤭💕 Why? Are you still feeling up for it?

Y/N: Of course, you know I just like to check in before I get all sexy for no reason… and because it’s just us tonight, we could wait for the rest of our friends to be free if you want.

Wifey 😈💕: You’re always sexy 😏 also no I am not missing another thirsty thursday! The happy hour prices are too good.

Y/N: Shut the fuck up. I’m gonna kiss you so hard.

Wifey 😈💕: My lips are ready 👄 Anyways what time are we leaving?

Y/N: Up to you my love, it’s Your birthday we’re celebrating.

Wifey 😈💕: I’ll just let you know when I’m on my way over and we can leave from your house.

Y/N: Sounds good, I’m gonna hop in the shower now keep me updated 💕

Wifey 😈💕: Of course, see you soon 🫶

A groan escapes you as you peel yourself up from your bed that you took a quick rest on while texting Lorraine. Knowing the both of you, you’ll probably get there within the last 15-30 minutes of happy hour, but that’s enough time to chug whatever you’ll need after your ritualistic car pregame. You quickly hop in the shower washing away the last of your shitty shift away from your mind as you begin to feel excitement for tonight grow.

It isn’t often that you and Lorraine get to go out and not worry about sobering up and leaving early because either you or someone in your group still has work the next morning. Especially for you, since you’re usually the driver, you stop drinking before everyone and guzzle down some water to make sure that you all get home safe. Tonight both you and Lorraine had no commitments the next day, and that meant you could finally relish in that fuzzy feeling of being drunk for more than just an hour.

Finally stepping out of the shower, you let the steam disperse while you head to your room to find something to wear tonight. Still feeling a bit tired from your shift earlier you decide to go for a combo you know you always feel safe in, big pants little shirt. Finding a pair of ripped jeans that weren’t too baggy in your mess of laundry you said you would fold days ago and some cute corset top, you decided the outfit was good enough. You weren’t really trying to attract too much attention, more focused on spending time with Lorraine, it is her birthday after all and you cherish your friendship with her. You both have grown closer over the last few years and it’s something you’re glad has developed as your friend group grows busier these days. Lorraine would make time to come by just to watch stupid videos and drink on your couch together when you didn’t feel like going out, offer her support when you’re feeling sick or down, make the horrible shifts at work go by faster with your silly joke flirting. You connect on a deep level, a best friend you never want to lose.

Ding Ding!

Your phone brings you back to reality as you were spacing out during your eyeshadow routine. You check the time, later than you planned but still earlier than your usual.

Wifey 😈💕: Just about done. Gonna head over soon, just gotta find me shoes.

Y/N: Okayyy, I’m like halfway done I’ll probably be ready by the time you get here.

Wifey 😈💕: Take your time, this is probably the earliest we’ve gone in a while anyways.

Y/N: True, let me know when you’re here 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

Lorraine reacted with a thumbs up and you set your phone down on the counter again to quickly finish the rest of your makeup. Just as you finish coating your lashes in mascara your doorbell rings loud through the empty home. “Hi sexy, come here often?” Lorraine giggles as you let her inside.

“I was here like… less than 48 hours ago,” she picks up Kitty as she runs over to greet her. “Hi you little menace.”

You smile closing the door behind you guys as you head back over to your room. “I’m ready I just need to get dressed. There’s some soju in the fridge for our little pregame if you wanna grab that.”

“Kay! I also brought some!” Lorraine shouts back as you shut your door to change quickly into the outfit you chose earlier. You laugh to yourself knowing you both were definitely in agreement on getting messy tonight. Grabbing some simple accessories and spritzing yourself with perfume you were ready to go.

“Alright let’s go! I’m ready to get fucked up with my wife.” You announce pulling on some boots that compliment your outfit.

“Looking sexy as always.” Lorraine says following your lead as you unlock your car.

“Never as sexy as you.” You wink back as you both burst into a fit of giggles and get into the car.

The car ride to the bar you frequent isn’t long, but long enough for you to shit talk about your annoying coworkers and complain about your daily life. Parking downtown was always a nightmare, but luckily you’d been in this area enough to find a good spot only two blocks away from the bar where you didn’t have to pay. Parking in your usual area you both continue to gossip and show each other new songs you found while passing the bottles of soju back and forth till you both felt you were at a good level. A few more drinks in the bar and you’d both be as inebriated as you were planning for tonight. You decided to leave the bulk of your stuff in the car, taking just your ID, credit card, and keys with you to lighten the load.

The short walk to the bar had you both complaining as it was colder this April than it usually is. “God it’s hard being sexy.” You joke as you make your way inside. Lorraine agrees as you make your way to the bar, opening a tab and ordering four of the fruity cocktails you both enjoyed. “You don’t pay for a thing tonight it’s your birthday!” You laugh trying to close Lorraine’s phone as you catch her trying to send you money for the drinks.

“Are you sure? I really don’t mind.” She hesitates.

“If you send me money I swear to god I’ll break up with you.” You fake threaten trying to hold back your smile.

She gasps and fakes sorrow as she grabs her two drinks, “Please god no!”

You giggle already sucking down your first drink, “Then don’t you dare send me a single penny.”

She nods giving up as she chugs her first drink alongside you. You both toss the empty cup into the trash and decide to head out to the floor with your other drink in hand to get a feel for the night.

It’s crowded and humid in the tiny bar, more people seem to be showing up compared to when you both first started coming here. Despite the crowd and the heat of all the bodies on the dance floor you still liked to come here, avoiding the more exclusive high end clubs deeper in the city. It was familiar and the drinks were cheaper here anyways.

You both surveyed the crowd as you swayed and danced with each other when a song you liked came on. Sharing your thoughts on the attractive people you saw or the regulars you don’t see as often anymore. You could tell by how you both clung to each other that the drinks were already setting in, but this was your chance to drink more. You were dead set on feeling the fuzzy glow of being drunk and dancing with your best friend.

“Do you want to drink more?” Lorraine asked as she tossed the cup of ice was holding the fruity drink long gone now.

“I planned on it.” You answer with a mischievous grin that Lorraine mirrors, happy with your answer. You head back to the bar, ordering another round of drinks the bartender quickly makes for you. “Do you wanna hang out here for a bit until he plays some better music?” You ask motioning to the empty stools.

Lorraine nods, “Yeah I could use a small break from all that must in there.”

As you both settle down and sip at your new drinks, swaying to the music and chatting, you notice Lorraine’s gaze looking behind you for a few moments. “What is it?” You ask curiously noticing a small shift in her smirk.

“So I wasn’t too sure, but there’s this really cute guy here and he’s totally eyeing you babe. Don’t look now though he’s still watching.” She speaks a little more quiet than your previous volume.

“What? Nah, he’s probably looking at you, have you seen yourself?” You compliment seriously, Lorraine was definitely one of your most beautiful friends and you made sure she knew so.

“I’m being so serious right now. I saw him out on the floor and he is definitely looking at you. He’s totally your type too. Tall, kinda big, got these kinda cat like eyes, slut glasses…”

“Slut glasses?” You turn around not so subtly, the drinks definitely taking a toll on your movements. You make quick eye contact with a man far too handsome for your drunk brain to process before he breaks the eye contact nervously acting as if he was just scoping out the bar. His friends laugh, confirming you had just caught him staring. You turn back to Lorraine, your drunken glow heating with the blush forming from your flustered thoughts. He was very much your type, in fact almost to the t. “Raine, there’s no way I could talk to him holy shit.” You babble bashfully as she laughs before you’re cut off by a song you both love. Both your eyes go wide before you’re practically dragging each other out onto the floor again getting lost in the sea of people.

At some point you guys had made it upstairs to the bathroom, taking a break from the crowd as the drinks buzzed through your bodies. You took your ritualistic mirror selfie together, taking a last quick hit of your vapes before deciding to head out and dance for a while longer before heading out. You try to forget the eye contact you made with the handsome stranger, but the intensity of his eyes is burned into your skull. He seemed so mysterious and intimidating, his looks making him seem almost unapproachable. Looking around now it seems like neither he or his friends are still here, not like you would have the courage to talk to him even with the drunks buzzing through your mind.

After some dancing, laughs, and odd people trying to make conversation you and Lorraine were obviously not interested in, you pull out your phone to check the time. It’s almost 1, you should probably start drinking some water and pee so you’re feeling well enough to drive by the time the bar closes at 3. “Let’s go back upstairs, I gotta pee so I can drive soon.” You inform Lorraine tugging lightly on her arm. She nods following you happily, both of you had a great time so far tonight, a successful birthday celebration.

“You should have talked to slut glasses.” Lorraine sighs as she fixes a bit of smudged lipstick in the mirror while you break your seal.

“Okay, yes he was hot, but I’m here with you for Your Birthday. Also I drove, so no way I’m ditching you for a guy I’d probably make a fool out of myself in front of.” You defend yourself as more clarity slowly rushes to you as the alcohol leaves your body.

“I bet he would think anything you do is cute, he could not keep his eyes off of you.” She countered switching spots with you as you washed your hands.

“Well, too bad we’ll probably never see him again.” You state drying your hands and leaning in to fix some of your smudged makeup as well. Lorraine shrugs and you feel around your pockets to find your vape to hit it before leaving the bathroom again, but something is off. Your eyes scan the bathroom trying piece together what’s off.

“What’s wrong? Why are you looking around like that?” Lorraine asks as she notices panic start to shine through your eyes.

“Raine…” You pause slapping your pockets and searching the bathroom frantically, how could you be so stupid? “Raine I lost my fucking keys.”

“What? Your keys?” She asks shocked. You aren’t the type to lose your shit. You’ve always been responsible with your driving duties and making sure everyone was safe, so it was hard to believe you lost your keys. Not to mention how hard it is to loose your keys adorned with many obnoxious keychains.

“Raine for real, I don’t have my keys. I must have dropped them somewhere we gotta go look.” You say trying your best to stay calm, but you’ve never felt yourself sober up so fast.

Lorraine was immediately on the same page finishing washing her hands quickly before you both bust out of the bathroom to start your search mission. You asked the bartender, the bouncer, security, any random person you passed by and no one had seemed to find your keys. Panic was setting in as you even desperately shined your phone’s flashlight into the trash cans thinking maybe you had thrown them away. At this point even a few kind strangers were helping you basically tear this bar apart to find your keys, but as time ticked on it was time to close and you still hadn’t found your keys.

Dejected and definitely sober now that you had run around for two hours searching, you leave your phone number with the bartender incase they find anything and head outside into the brisk air. “Well this fucking sucks. I’m sorry Raine, I’m never this messy, I didn’t mean to kill the mood at the end of the night.” You apologize, coming to terms with the fact that you guys will have to uber home and you’ve wasted the last two hours of your night on a wild goose chase.

“Hey it’s okay, I had fun. Shit happens we’ll figure this out.” She comforts you as you stand at the crosswalk waiting for the light to change before deciding to just jaywalk, the streets were empty anyways.

“I know, but I still feel stupid, I’ve never had something like this happen.” You sigh as you guys walk back to where you were parked. You agreed you might as well go check to see if your car or anything inside of it had been stolen with your missing keys.

“Well luckily your car and our stuff is still here. We just gotta call an uber and figure out how to get your car later.” Lorraine reassures you.

“You’re right. I have a spare somewhere at home, I’ll have to dig around and hope my car doesn’t get stolen before I get back.” You sigh defeated as you approach your car and lean on the hood wallowing in self pity for a moment before you download the uber app back onto your phone. As you lie there for a moment, you notice something tucked under your windshield wipers. “Raine what’s that?” You ask standing up now inspecting it.

“A bag?” Lorraine looks around to spot if anyone else is around. Random objects on cars being common to get women to stop before getting in their car so they can be grabbed and trafficked. You’ve been here for a while now though and the streets are basically empty, the thumping of music in clubs open later down the street the only sound floating through the air. Safe to say you weren’t getting trafficked.

You nervously reached out and took the black plastic bag from under your wipers and give Lorraine an incredulous look. “There’s no fucking way my keys are in this bag.”

“What? For real?” She steps closer as you reach your hand in and pull out your obnoxiously keychain adorned keys. “How?”

Possibilities of what could have happened bounce around your brain, but none of it seems to make sense. “I guess someone in the bar found my keys and walked two blocks this way to find my car and not steal anything? God I’m so fucking lucky right now, how the fuck?” Your brain couldn’t even comprehend why someone would even do that for a stranger. As you walk around to open your door you notice a tiny scrap of paper wedged into the space between the glass of your window and the door. “They left a note too?” You announce as both of you settle into the car now.

“What does it say?” Lorraine leans closer as you both look down at the small note. All it had was an arrow pointing to the front of your car and the word keys next to what looked to be somebody’s phone number. “They left their phone number? What if it was that cute guy from the bar?”

Your heart speeds up at the thought of the number possibly belonging to him. “There were so many people there tonight, it could be anyone.” You brush off the idea as you pocket the scrap of paper and start the car. “I miss my bed and my cat lets go home.”

Lorraine giggles noticing your flustered state but agrees. The clock was reaching closer to 4 am and you didn’t want to fall asleep behind the wheel. The whole ordeal sobered you both up quickly and the energy of the night was fading as Lorraine dozed between songs on the ride home. When you got home you made her promise to text you when she was home safe, exchanging a hug and love you’s before going inside to get ready for bed.

As you washed off your makeup for the night and changed into an old shirt to sleep in you remembered the number stuffed in your jean pocket. You grabbed it observing it for a second while you waited for the text from your friend to know she was home safe and decided to send out a quick thank you. Typing the number into your phone and saving it under “Key Savior 🙏” to make sure you remembered who it was if they ever texted back.

Y/N: Hi, uh thanks for finding my keys and my car tonight… I’m glad it was you and not someone who wanted to steal my car lol

You cringed after sending the text, realizing just how awkward you sounded but were quickly distracted when a new text came in from Lorraine.

Wifey 😈💕: Made it home safe 💕 Sleep well 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 oooh and update me on the mystery key person

Y/N: Yaaay! Glad you made it home. I texted a thank you but I doubt I’ll get a reply since it’s like almost 5 am at this point. I’m about to pass out love you 💕

You responded feeling much more secure in going to bed now knowing your friend was safe. You put your phone on the charger, happy you had absolutely nothing to do tomorrow meaning you could sleep well into the afternoon. With the last of your energy depleting quickly you shut your eyes, your brain recalling your messy night before sending you into deep sleep.

You woke up with a warm furry mass tucked into your arms and your body begging for water, but you couldn’t be bothered as you pulled Kitty closer listening to her purrs as she realized you had finally woken up. After a few minutes of cuddling she wiggled out of your arms stretching and running off to cause havoc somewhere in the house. You groaned reaching for the water on your bedside table, thanking your past self for remembering as you chugged it down like a horse. Reaching for your phone you squinted at the screen, the time reading 2:15 PM. You sighed scrolling through the notifications on your phone, texts in the work group chat, texts from Lorraine shit talking whoever was causing shit in said group chat, missed spam calls, and a text from “Key Savior 🙏” that came in almost 4 hours ago. You clicked on the notification quickly, curious to see what they could have said.

Key Savior 🙏: Hey! Happy to hear you got your keys back, I tried to find you in the bar after you lost them but you and your friend disappeared quick. I hope it wasn’t too hard to find them :)

You smile at the awkward reply, you didn’t really know if you were supposed to respond after that. Maybe they just wanted to know you got your keys and that was all. Something drew you to responding anyways, curious as to what kind of person would go two blocks away to find your car and not steal a single thing.

Y/N: I mean, it was just two hours of panicking and searching the bar before we actually went out to my car, but I got a happier ending than most people who lose their keys in a bar. You know you could have left my keys with the bartender and saved me a heart attack right? :p

You got up to get yourself more water and some breakfast for you and Kitty after replying, shocked to see that it didn’t take too long for them to reply back.

Key Savior🙏: Honestly, I wasn’t the most sober myself and after I couldn’t find you my next best option was to go find your car in my brain. Like you said I could have just driven away with your car, at least have a little gratitude 🤨

You giggled at your phone as you sipped on some tea, starting to see some of this person’s personality come out with this text.

Y/N: My bad oh mighty Key Savior! How might I ever be able to repay you for your glorious good samaritan deeds!

Key Savior🙏: Maybe I should have just taken the car…

Y/N: Too late for that now. I am curious if two things though…

Key Savior🙏: What’s that?

Y/N: One, why didn’t you steal our shit? Two, why did you leave your number?

Key Savior🙏: I didn’t really want to steal your car in the first place?? I was trying to find you, like I said earlier, but you disappeared. I left my number because I wanted to talk to you, simple really.

Your eyebrows raise slightly at that last text, they wanted to talk to me?

Y/N: Wait, why did you want to talk to me?

Key Savior🙏: I had to know what kind of person you were to lose keys that obnoxious and jangly.

Y/N: Hey! I love my keychains :(

Key Savior🙏: I’m kidding! Honestly… I was kind of watching you a for a while last night and I think you’re really beautiful. I couldn’t bring myself to approach you and interrupt you and your friend… or girlfriend?? No judgement idk you seemed pretty close…

You laughed at the end of that last message, but started racking your brain to remember anyone who had been watching you last night. Then it hits you, the cute guy in slut glasses? There’s no way.. right?

Y/N: SLUT GLASSES??

Key Savior🙏: excuse me?

Y/N: I mean, sorry uh. No we’re not dating that’s my best friend Raine, we were celebrating her birthday… Who are you did we ever like interact? I was… pretty fucked up last night sorry..

Key Savior🙏: Lol no need to apologize.. Uh we didn’t really interact, but I think you caught me staring at the bar..

Your heart froze, it had to be him, he’s the only person you remember making distinct brief eye contact with. Lorraine was going to love this development when you told her. Another text came in.

Key Savior🙏: Would you maybe want to like, video call or something? I want to keep talking to you, but I promised I’d play some games with some of my friends in a few…

You rushed to the mirror and winced seeing your makeup you half ass washed off last night smearing on your face. You took a makeup wipe and tried to make yourself look more presentable, but there was no way you were gonna be able to get a full face back on before he wanted to call. Were you actually going to call? This isn’t something you’d normally allow, your social anxiety ruling over you on most occasions. There was just something about this guy that made you want to talk more, so you grabbed your phone to type out your next reply as you freshened up.

Y/N: Like video games?? Will you stream it to me so I can watch?

Key Savior🙏: I could do that! Uh do you.. have a discord account?

Y/N: Discord.. so you’re that kinda guy 🤨

You giggle as you try not to choke on your toothpaste.

Key Savior🙏: Where else am I supposed to stream video games and video chat at the same time?

Y/N: Fair.. as long as you aren’t playing league of legends you’re safe

Key Savior🙏: …maybe I can stream to you another time?

Y/N: NO YOU’RE PLAYING LEAGUE??

Key Savior🙏: I PROMISE I’M NOT TOXIC ITS JUST FOR FUN!!

Y/N: I’ll be the judge of that..

You smile as you send him your discord tag, quickly seeing a new friend request pop up in your notifications that you accept. Not long after you see a private call ringing from him. You take a deep breath and brace yourself, hoping you could fake a little confidence and not make this too awkward before accepting the call. His profile picture of some video game character taking up your screen as the call connects.

“Hello?” A deep voice startles you as it carries from your phones speakers to your ears.

“H-hi. Uh.. I still don’t know your name, sorry.” You could smack yourself with how awkward you already sounded.

The mystery man chuckled and you heard a few clicks as he set up his stream for you. “It’s Wonwoo. What about you?”

“Ah I’m Y/N. Nice to finally put a name to my Key Savior.” You joke cringing at your awkwardness.

The deep laugh shakes you again. “Is that what you’ve been calling me? What else did you call me? Slut glasses?”

“Well, I actually still don’t know if that’s you. I could be placing you with some other dudes face from the bar.” You quickly defend yourself.

“Should we turn on our cameras then Y/N? I’d be happy to see your pretty face again.” He says smoothly.

“Damn, you sure are confident for someone who couldn’t approach me last night.” You tease trying to sound more confident yourself.

“I was trying to be respectful! Turn on your camera, I wanted to talk to you not your Miku profile picture.” He defends himself.

“Fine.” You sigh taking another breath to steel your nerves before pressing the camera button on.

“Wow, you’re prettier than I remember, I don’t know if I’ll be able to focus on the game.” He flirts and you try to hold back the butterflies that swirl in your stomach and formulate a reply.

“Shut up, turn your camera on or I’m turning it back off this is awkward.” You whine failing to hide your desperation to confirm it is who you think it is.

“Fine fine, I’m turning it on.” He replies as his video loads on your screen.

Finally confirming his identity, you gasp. “You are slut glasses!” You spit out smacking your hand over your mouth embarrassed you said that out loud.

He laughs again glancing at you whenever he had the chance to take his eyes off the game to watch as your blush grew reaching up to your ears. “Are these slut glasses? Honestly, I’m just really blind without them. You’re really cute when you blush by the way.” He grins as he watches you squirm from the compliment he tagged onto the end of his reply so nonchalantly.

“Ah focus on your game, you’re getting your ass handed to you right now!” You quickly brush off his comment trying to ignore the way your heart beat just a bit faster.

Wonwoo laughs and focuses more on the screen, not seeming too stressed about his situation. “I’m not that concerned about winning, my friend is just trying to level up.” He barely evaded a hit from the other team and recalls back to the base to heal and grab more items.

“He’d level up faster if you guys win wouldn’t he?” You question, conversation coming easier now that the topic was changed.

“Sure, but where’s the fun if I do all the work for him? What’s in it for me?” He grins looking over to a corner of the screen you’re sure your camera feed is sitting in now.

“You’re cruel!” You smile knowing you’d probably do the same in his position. “You’re not gonna impress me if you don’t win though.” You shoot, surprised at your sudden boost of confidence.

“Oh is that how it is? Thought you didn’t like League gamers?” He raises an eyebrow.

“Well, I’m sitting here watching you, might as well make it interesting and win.” You snap back holding your ground, but you could feel your heart hammering in your chest with anxiety.

“I see… Well I could easily win, but you’ve gotta do something for me if I do.” He states confidently, recalling back to their base and changing his build strategy.

“What would that be?” You ask chewing on your lip to quell the nerves running through you.

“Go on a date with me.” He says simply turning to face the camera more directly watching your face as you process his request. For a moment you were quiet as your brain turned his request over and over in your head, feeling the heat creep up your face. “I mean, if you want to that is..”

“No! I mean!” You smack your face down into your pillows and let out an exasperated sigh. Pull yourself together! “It’s a deal, but it looks like your chances at winning are pretty low now that you’re getting into late game.” You answer after finding your composure.

He chuckles and shifts to pay attention to the game, a newfound look of confidence washing over him made the butterflies become more aggressive in your stomach. “Are you free tomorrow?” He asks calmly as he throws his character into the brute of the fight with the other team, instantly taking out two of them and badly damaging the rest of them.

“Um, yeah I should be.” You answer the anticipation building as he takes out the rest of the team even at lower health before getting healed. “Okay maybe you’re a little too good at this game.”

He smiles, your comment adding fuel to his fire as he rushes the teams base, working in taking out their final turrets. “Only when I want to be. Does afternoon sound okay, like maybe 1 or 2?”

“F-for the date? Is that not too early?” You ask, worried how you’d even survive spending that much time around someone so attractive.

“I have plans and want to spend some time with you. I can always take you home if you want to leave too, I won’t be upset.” He shrugs taking out the last turret as his team immediately attacks the nexus. He turns his attention to you once he’s sure his win is secured, the victory screen flashing across the stream.

“Okay, fine. I mean you won fair and square. Am I allowed to know what these plans are?” You question, already stressing about what to wear.

“Nope, it’s nothing fancy though don’t worry and dress comfortably.” He answers as if he was reading every worried thought that passed through your brain.

You nod gulping down the nerves that continued to creep into your thoughts. “Okay, but I should probably get some stuff done today then. You should ready up for your next game your friends are complaining in chat.” You smile giggling nervously.

He looks a little upset when he hears you’re gonna go but nods and quickly replaces it with a smile. “Sure, I’ll text you though?”

You nod again as your thumb anxiously hovers over the end call button. “For sure, I’ll talk to you soon.”

He grins seemingly pleased with your reaction and leans back in his chair. “Okay, I’ll talk to you soon then Y/N.”

The call ends after your quick goodbyes and you suck in a deep breath before screaming into your pillows. You scramble for your phone quickly dialing Lorraine, she’ll know what to do.

“Good morning sleeping beauty! How’s the hangover?” She answers after a few rings.

“Raine you need to come over right fucking now or I am going to rip my floorboards up.” You rush out already running to your closet to plan an outfit.

“Woah, what happened? Did you not just wake up?” She laughs at your dramatic tone.

“I have a date with slut glasses tomorrow! Come help me before I throw myself off a cliff!” You yell tearing through your closet.

“Oh my god, you’re in a crisis. I’m on my way, but you need to tell me EVERYTHING!” She says shuffling on her end indicating her preparation to leave.

“Of course I will, please just hurry!” You whine squealing as a new text slides down over your ongoing call.

Key Savior🙏: So where should I pick you up tomorrow? :)

#seventeen #svt #wonwoo #wonu #jeon wonwoo #seventeen wonwoo #seventeen fanfic #wonwoo x reader #wonwoo x y/n

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lifblogs · 3 months

Note

🖤🎂🎧📝🫐🪻 <3

Omg, thanks for sending this ask!

🖤 Favorite hobbies outside of your blog?

I’m a housebound nerd. It’s reading and watching TV for me! I’ve also gotten back into listening to music, which doesn’t always work out because of my TBI (sometimes makes me sick, and causes pain). Does being a cat mom count? Sometimes I’ll be on mommy duty for a couple hours a day, and I love it.

🎂 When is your birthday?

April 3rd!

🎧 Last song you listened to?

“Ahsoka - End Credits” composed by Kevin Kiner for Ahsoka.

📝 Last thing you wrote?

This. Ironically, I wrote it the night before I hit my head. :( *sigh* At least this idea is finally started, at least.)

🫐 Some place you’d love to visit?

New Zealand! Someone take me to the Shire. Also Alaska; Lyons, France (actually lots of places in France); Iceland, England, China (probably somewhere rural, like any of the mountains, or maybe Henan Province); and the Great Lakes.

🪻 What is the toughest thing you had to go through, but can you’ve successfully overcome?

‼️WARNING FOR SEVERE ANIMAL ILLNESS.‼️

Maybe some people won’t like this answer, but I’m not sure humans actually overcome hardship. What we do do is change. We adapt. It’s what we’re good at even while we hate it. So with that said, I… actually have a hard time choosing because my life has been filled with tough moments that I’ve had to work through in order to keep living. So many, to the point of even surprising a few mental health specialists. I’m sure my answer for this will be different every day, but right now I want to say seeing Loki have his first seizure and having to take him to the hospital while I unknowingly had a broken leg. I had a panic attack when I saw his seizure and how distressed he was, I saw my life literally crumbling around me. Finding out this will eventually kill him was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to acknowledge. And hearing that his bloodwork showed he was in pain from the seizure— That was one of the worst nights of my life. I didn’t sleep at all, and I was sick from my IBS and migraines and fibro because of it, and I just cried and cried. And then I went to physical therapy while he was still at the hospital, like my life was normal. We took him home that day and already his life was different, mine was different. Yet I swear I love him more every single day. I’m scarred, and I’m absolutely terrified about his future, and I’ve had to watch him have almost a hundred seizures since then. Yet I make myself as excited as possible every time I see him. I play with him as much as I can, I shower him in kisses, and cuddles, and love. I keep living with him as my baby. I cry sometimes when he’s sick, but I pull myself together for his sake. And I’ll be honest, I have no idea how I’m still here, but I am, and I think it’s for him despite the pain. So I never really overcame anything. I adapted. Loki adapted. He’s my baby, no matter what comes his way.

#ask #cascigarette #ask game

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eldritch-spouse · 2 years

Note

What if bregina walked in on her roomie touching herself ? roomie starts teasing her and she’s in disbelief this is actually happening

[HHhhhng- An excuse to write porn with Bregina.]

She's harmless... At least that, right?

Oh for fuck's sake, you can't even lie to yourself, that woman will be the death of you.

"Help me tighten this dress!"; "Where are you going so late?"; "I can't unlock the phone again..."; "Help me fix my room?"; "Can we hang out today? Tomorrow?"; "Hahah, I just thought I could go with you?"-

She just won't let go of you. You didn't think having a monster roommate would be like this. Well, that's a bit a stretch, right? Surely, not every monster is like Bregina, she's just... Quirky? Yeah, that's one very generous way to put it. Beggars can't be choosers, you needed a roommate and she pays the rent on time. Besides, you thought you were making a good choice anyway, even if Bregina is a bit creepy, you feel safer sharing your living space with a monster woman than with a monster man.

Nowadays, you're prone to thinking that maybe having a guy around would have been a less invasive choice.

Not that you regret this. No no, your roommate is very sweet to you- But maybe that's also her biggest flaw. It's like she doesn't know when to stop. She’s trying too hard to be your friend, to make you happy, to do anything and everything she can to ensure your satisfaction. First, you assumed she was some sort of people pleaser, then you worried that the breeder felt guilty about needing help to understand basic day to day life concepts, but now…

Now you’re pretty sure that’s not the case.

Setting your things down on the living room table, your eyes poise on a peculiar gray bag neatly stapled closed. Curiosity beckons a closer look, and a sinking feeling pools in your gut when you see the neat blue note sticking to it.

“ For my angel, from Gina! “

The note is flooded in hearts and poorly drawn smiling faces. Your nickname in particular is circled over and over in an almost frantic manner. God damn it. It’s the fourth one this week, and it’s only Wednesday. Your birthday’s in a couple of months too, so it doesn’t really make sense that she’s showering you with gifts. Well, it does, you just don’t want to acknowledge that right now. There’s too much in your head already.

Carefully prying the bag open, you peek inside, finding some article of clothing. Upon fishing it out, it becomes clear that you're holding a dress. A blue dress that's decidedly form-fitting. And, oddly enough, just by looking at it, you can tell the size is most likely adequate for you. How does she even know this? You don't recall telling Gina-

The laundry. Of course. She insists on doing it, of course she knows your sizes by now. Dumbass.

It's an admittedly cute-looking cut, you have to hand it to her. You remember when you started living with Bregina, she dressed so oddly. Almost like she didn't quite understand clothes or what to match. Then she started copying the types of styles you wore, and now here she is, tactful enough to not only choose things that look gorgeous on her but also gift you a dress that matches perfectly with your body type. All of this what… In the span of a month or two? Quick learner indeed.

Mood lifted by the unexpected present, you strip then and there, eager to put it on. It's comfortable, and although initially seeming a bit tight, it takes you a second to realize that it's hugging all the right places. It pushes your chest up and highlights curves in a way that has you blushing at yourself in front of the bedroom mirror. Well… This one's definitely more bold than the last couple of presents. You fear she might just give you lingerie someday.

Two good pictures later and you stumble back into the living room, practically draped on the couch as you think of what to text your roommate. "Thank you for all these gifts, I feel like a sugar baby"?, "Omg you're so nice to me stop it"?- There's just… What do you even say? She's giving you these things because she has a clearer than water crush on you and you're not even sure if you return these feelings. You know what the breeder wants to hear is an "I love you", but can you say that to her? Can you deal with the consequences?

Part of you feels so very guilty about all this, because you'd hate to shatter her heart, she's genuinely the nicest person you have in your life right now. And you don't want to make her upset, that's the last thing you'd want to do. But the other… The other one likes this attention. Enjoys being wanted, pampered, having someone trip over themselves just to please you. That part would say "I love you" in a heartbeat, just to keep it going.

You don't know. You really don't know what you'll do about this bizarre standstill.

Sometimes however, you like to imagine going further with this. Letting Bregina have just a teensy tiny taste of what she wants, and let yourself pretend that it's real, that you want it too. Maybe you do? This is a tangle of feelings you haven't processed yet.

One thing's for sure. She gives you so much, sometimes you think you wouldn't mind giving back a little. Bare digits ghost the hem of your newly acquired dress, thinking about showing off to her as you edge it up to your hips. You know she’d go wild with a simple glimpse of your panties. You’ve known that ever since you walked around the house in your underwear and Bregina could barely stutter out a word, face so flushed you thought she was going to turn into some kind of blueberry. It didn’t occur to you that it was inappropriate at the time, you’ve always been used to living with other women and being in mild states of undress around each other was never a taboo… The way the monster would lick her lips constantly, shifting her legs and appearing to drool at times, was incredibly unnerving to your oblivious self back then.

Now? Oh, now it just makes you smile bashfully.

You don’t think anyone has ever wanted you as much as Gina does. No one certainly has cuter reactions to your body than her. Maybe you should start playing around with that. You don’t know if it’s the dress making you feel sexy in your own body, or if you’re really that lonely and greatly affected by the simple act of affection from her- Maybe it’s just boredom or hormones, but you start palming at the crux between your legs, closing your eyes. What would it be like to have those large hands touching you anyway? To have her body above yours, doing whatever she wanted to you as “payment” for all her gifts.

Your breathing comes in shorter bursts when you slide the fabric of your damp underwear to the side, one hand coming to grab your breasts while the other traces faster at your button, enjoying the moment, the fantasy, without having to think about what it would actually entail if you allowed such to happen. Bregina would be a good fuck, for sure, with those strong legs to buck onto your face with and fingers big enough to stretch you you, even her impressive rack- You know they’re called breeders, but her sex appeal is so on the nose.

To be frank, you don’t even know if you’d be able to handle a monster woman like her, she might find you underwhelming… You’re surprised she doesn’t have a constant group of admirers trailing after her at all times. That she’s laser-focused on little old you.

You can’t help but moan and toss your head back when the image of her stupidly large tongue stuffed into your cunt manifests itself. You just know it would be a whole new type of heaven on Earth. Does she even know how to eat someone out? You can teach her, she’ll get the hang of it fast just like with everything else. Well, most things that is, she still can’t be trusted with a stove. Or microwave.

The closer you get, the more your hips move, rolling into the motions as you wish you had something a little more convenient to work with. Though, as pleasure slowly morphs into slight frustration, your high fades just enough that you can finally hear your surroundings. Including the ragged panting nearby and the obscene shlick of working fingers that are definitely not your own.

A mortifying dread crawls up your spine as you dare open your eyes, gulping when you finally look ahead and see none other than your roommate at the doorway, creating dents in the wooden door while her other hand is unceremoniously stuffed beneath her skirt. You’re both deplorable. The only difference here is that one of you has not stopped yet and wow she’s actually fucking dripping- Like down to the floor. Jesus. Is that normal for her kind?

You feel extremely awkward that the monster woman is still fucking herself to your flustered, caught red-handed state, though your clit certainly twitches just observing the fevered motions of that clawed pale hand. A lot of precision for someone with sharp digits. This must be sending all sorts of signals to Bregina. You, on the couch, wearing the dress she got for you, playing with your pussy? Yeah, there couldn’t possibly be a more blatant “fuck me” signal than that. You… You thought she wasn’t home! It was so quiet. God damn it. Idiot.

“ Ahahn- Why did you stop? “ She finally says, halting her own motions. You get to see those unbelievably slick digits that she wipes on her skirt- Ew, gross.

“ I- Gina- I didn’t think you’d- “ Didn’t think you’d walk in on me being a fucking pervert.

“ O-Oh, you’re shy! “ She grins so wide and fiendishly that your throat dries up, eyes bulging when the breeder quickly closes the distance. “ I’ll help, don’t worry! “

You can only squawk when she basically slams onto the couch, holding your legs apart. “ H-Hey- “ You’re redder than a cherry.

“ I’m so glad you loved my gift! Had I known you’d like it this much, I would have bought it for you sooner! “

“ I- Uh- T-Thanks? “ You fucking moron, do something already! This is so humiliating.

Her giggling is almost contagious as the monster quickly tugs your dress down, pushing your bra out of the way so your tits can bounce free while she drapes over you, wet fingers already poking at your entrance while that long tail blurs behind her. Your inner turmoil is short-lived as soon as one digit curls inside you. Holy shit.

She must have felt the way you immediately tightened around it, because Bregina moans in glee, delighted when you grab onto her arms for support.

“ H-Hold on tight, angel! “ She pants, bucking a second finger in and nearly making you curl up at the stretch. “ I can’t wait to see you make a mess on your new dress… “

She was right, you do have to hold on, because every delicious plunge of those fingers carries an almost scary level of force behind it, jostling you at the same time that it makes sparks fly through your whole body.

And soon, you’re nothing but a blubbering mess beneath the woman that has been craving this from the moment she set eyes upon you, cooing sweetly.

#Bregina #monster girlfriend #terato #yandere teratophilia

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beenjen · 1 year

Text

Last Friday, was the first time, that I mentally felt I could cogitate making a dinner for our family. Through the last 6 months of decline - and I can be honest now, I was hopeful before, it’s been awful for at least that long even with the good scan - I would just stand in the kitchen. Looking in the cabinets. Looking in the fridge. Running out to the garage deep freeze. Looking at food and options, literally not able to put a damn meal together.

I just, quite literally, COULD NOT, look at a fridge/cabinet/freezer space and put 2 and 2 together to come up with tacos, or spaghetti and green beans, it has just been beyond me. I worried that was I slipping? Getting Alzheimer’s? What was happening.

I realize and acknowledge now, the tremendous stress, it’s been stress on top of stress. Pain. Grief. Anger. It’s the first time, in my life, I’ve lost some form of functionality from emotion.

I tried so hard. To eat right. Get sleep. Drink my water. Go to yoga. Get outside. Do all the things… yet….

- forgot to renew a VERY IMPORTANT certification at work (luckily, my boss….he’s been Uber chill and supportive. He word for word told me, ‘Jen, we will work with you. We hate this is happening all at once. Whatever you need.’) it was a fireable offense. I could have lost my job. The stress from that alone, kept me from cuing in on moms acute decline, and that’s a whole other story of guilt and what ifs circling in my brain.

- I forgot an event at jamis school…. I even took him to get a cavity filled, then took him to school after…. Then tried to go get a massage for self care, his school called and called (which I missed for 60 whole minutes), C had to leave work to pick him up…. I didn’t even give him ibuprofen. My baby, had a drill in his mouth, and it never even crossed my mind. I’m a nurse!!!!

- I’m sure there’s more shit, I just, whatever at this point.

I haven’t written thank you letters yet. I just, can’t. I just can’t.

It fell to me, to pick moms clothes, to pick her make up and hair. To pick her casket. Her flowers. Her vault. Her everything.

They completely botched her hair and lipstick - my mom was a stickler. Had to fix it with a paintbrush, had to comb out her hair.

It’s fucking traumatic.

The very next day, we take dad to see the thoracic surgeon - a close friend of mine - who was absolutely GUTTED to share with us that dads lung cancer is inoperable.

The sheer amount of comfort I’ve had to offer to other people through this process, I wasn’t prepared for.

My uncles BROKE DOWN. Watching my dad y’all, there aren’t words. They were married 52 years. He’s lost. My brother. The heart-wrenching sobs from him, I’ve never seen him like that. My husband. My daughter. My 4 year old has taken this as hard as my dad. She’s acting out, not sleeping. Cries for my mom. It’s horrific. My son refuses to even talk about it. Refuses. They were close and I’ll have to poke that bear, just, it’s shit.

It’s been a nightmare. I’m heartbroken. I’m not sure words express all of this.

I fucking miss her.

I want the kids to have an Easter basket from her.

I want to get a card in the mail from her.

I want to celebrate Mother’s Day, 4th of July, her birthday.

It’s surreal.

The support we’ve had has been incredible. I’ve never seen the like of flowers, the volume of people streaming in through the whole ordeal. It has been just insane.

I ended up getting a stool, sitting it by moms casket, and just greeted person after person. Listened to their stories. Made small talk. The things that came out of my mouth? Even as I said some of it, I was thinking ‘what the eternal fuck did I just say?.’ It was a FULL HOUSE. There were people everywhere.

I’ve had so many calls, texts, cards, emails, telling me how beautiful the ceremony was. How lovey the service. I’m not sure I have ever sent that exact message to someone, so I suppose they were being honest? I hope so. It was the last thing I could do for my mom. I wanted to get it right.

I’m not ready to share just yet about withdrawing care and what that experience was like. How it was the true last thing I could do for my mom, to follow her wishes.

The agony. It’s intense.

Also, this is just a thought dump, I’m not even clear on my feelings at this point. It’s, a fog.

I’m coming out of it.

We have had family dinners 3 times over the past week. We’ve flossed and brushed. Everyone has had vitamins. The school uniforms are clean. I’m washing my face. One foot in front of the other.

It’s always nice to see you xx

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aliothbuzzsawshark · 3 months

Text

Notes for The Melancholy Of Yuuou

What a gift.

He stands so straight and baby boy get a belt it looks like you need it

They really are just nice siblings. Yeah some aren’t the brightest bulbs and still likely hold a bit of a grudge because of Yuo’s plan but it’s stil so sweet that they’re doing all this for him

Damn they really just pushed him out. At least Yuro waved

I DON’T LIKE FIRST POV STOP IT STOP okay thanks.

Tiny.

NO IT’S COMPLETELY IMPOSSIBLE I DON’T HAVE WORK TO DO, BREAKS AND OFF DAYS AREN’T EVEN IN MY CONTRACT!

Nicely animated swing? Also we’ve seen this park before right

*Shaking Konami by the shoulders* WHAT EVEN WAS YUO’S PLOT? WAS IT JUST RECORDIBG YUGA SAYING “yeah sure why not lol” BECAUSE THAT’S STUPID. I KNOW YUO’S SMARTER THAN THINKING THAT WOULD WORK WITHOUT THE DUEL MAKER

Sliding down sound affects. while in heels like a madman. We love to see Romin have a flair for the dramatics.

Sorry, this is my one single off day since I was five and I’d rather contemplate my siblings and current situation while alone on the kiddie swings than be in a magical girl anime

Gakuto came out of the dog house because he’s a bitch

get him a nap he looks like he needs one

Not me simultaneously gasping with Yuo at the threat “curry.”

YO I CAN COOK UP YUO AND ROMIN PARALLELS LIKE ROMIN COOKS UP CURRY as in insane

LET HER COOK

that was such a genuine scream for a wave of curry

Romin really woke up and called Gakuto like “Hey remember our sick ass cosplays? Well what if you do that again but as therapists. No I don’t have anyone in mind but it’s still cool. Met me and the kiddie park in full cosplay I’ll work this acting like it deserves an oscar”

He’s sad and lonely and covers it up and never lets himself be truly vulnerable and like he’s 11 he should be playing with Barbie dolls and having friends not being alone at your job thinking about how much you’re siblings must hate you

Romin is so bad at comforting I love that for her

Roa stop being Cunty

Anyways while recaps happens *thinks back to the Yuo is just like me post* AHAHA OH

These guitars go hard man

WE LOVE A LIAR YASSSSS

HE’S HIS PUPPET.

Kill Roa thank you Luke

THEY’RE BOTH POWER HUNGRY AND PUT THAT OVER THEIR LOVED ONES *Shaking you up and down over Yuo and Luke parallels over and over*

WACK HIM WITH THE MAGICAL GIRL STICK. BONK HIM. DESTROY HIM.

it’s now just 10 minutes I talk too much

Damn he didn’t even get ice cream for himself never mind lol

Yuo’s VA is so good at screaming no wonder he’s Izuku. Also why is that the default reactions to anything happening he dislikes/didn’t predict

Anyways now that it’s been revealed it’s a birthday time to get cake for meee <3

Oh Luke hired Mimi back? That’s actually really nice good job Luke

HELL YEAH FIRST FLASHBACK TO SWIRLY LET’S GOOO

Also yeah the Reborn event probably happened on Yuo’s birthday. Poor guy

Small hands.

NO NO NO HE DOESN’T THINK HE’S WORTH CELEBRATING MMMMMNOOOOO

am. am I going to cry to Yuo knowing how much he caused and how he almost fucked over peoples lives and how he’s dealing with that

Welcome to the part of the notes with more projecting

Yuo is such a fascinating character. Like, yeah, in his very business and logical heavy mind, how could he repay the pain he must have given. He doesn’t expect forgiveness, he doesn’t expect people to like him, that’s his business side. That compares to his puppeteering side, a side of him begging to see his puppets beg for even implying a chance of winning after being beaten, a side knowing he’ll be the star of the show with his Ashurastar. But he’s still human, still an eleven year old that has human wants like love. This is a huge ass rant oopies

He wants to be a good sibling so bad that he’s now just going with the nonsense

“Just what kind of life have you led Yuuou-kun“ is the nice way of saying “what the fuck is wrong with you”

ROMIN A DOLL IS ONE OF THE WORST THINGS TO PRACTICE WITH HE VIEWS THEM AS SERVANTS TO HIS POWER

“Thannnn…anmmisszamm…THANKS FOR NOTHING!” Proceeds to sigh in self disappointment

USE THE POWER OF RACISM GAKUTO. OKAY

What a mood man

Mmmmmm I have too many words to say about the party and Yuo’s reaction

AAACHDDGGSSHIYCDJHFGJMMMMMMM

It’s so sweet and nice and Yuo looks so so happy and everyone is having a good time and I feel like I’m going to cry

After all this…he gets to bonk. Also Gakuto in drag fits weirdly well

EE THEY’RE PLAY FIGHTING THEY’RE PLAY FIGHTING THEY’RE LIKE LITTLE KIDS WITHOUT ANY RESPONSIBILITIES

Obsessed.

Ooooooo that’s a great ending. Everyone is having a great time and then just the sudden flashbacks and reassurging memories. Yuo can still have fun but at the back of his mind it’s still there. Great

#catboy tag💛#talks with buzzsaw #You’ll get Goha Lore notes tomorrow #875 words OOPS

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banannabethchase · 10 months

Text

Set the World Alight: Chapter 13 - also on Ao3

It's Matt's birthday. She's excited. Nick is…feeling weird.

Thursday, March 13th

Matt wakes up on her eighteenth birthday, in her own bedroom, about half an hour before her alarm to her phone going ballistic.

“What the heck?” she mumbles, rolling over. She hits her arm on the sloped wall, still not totally used to the new room. “Ow!”

When she grabs her phone, she can’t help but grin. She has fifteen messages, at least five from Mox alone from what she can see, wishing her happy birthday.

hey love u happy birthday am I the first text

also i kno ur old enough but dont go vape its so bad for u

that last message was mostly a joke but still no vaping

She holds the phone to her chest as she practically spins out of bed. Matt gets ready, pleased for a repaired bathroom and her own space, and practically skips through the garage back into the main house. “Good my birthday morning, everybody!”

Nick stares at her, eyes still squinted. Their mom is yawning over a bowl of cereal.

“You’re chipper,” Nick mumbles. “Happy birthday.”

Matt beams at him. “It’s my first birthday as a girl.”

It’s like a switch with how quickly Nick’s and their mom’s faces change.

“Oh, baby, you’re right!” her mom says. “Wow. What an amazing – you text me what kind of cake you want, if you want decorations, okay? We’re going to do a nice dinner tonight.” She frowns. “Is it too last minute? Try not to invite too many, love, we don’t have a big house.”

Matt grins, feeling the excitement bubble. “Okay! Um. Can we have lasagna? And that big salad thing you make?”

Their mom nods and begins making notes on her phone. “What a good day to be off, wow. Alright. I need to get dressed. We have a whole thing to do!” In a whirl of pajamas, cereal, and excitement, she runs upstairs.

“I can text Kenny and Adam,” Nick says, waving his phone. “I mean. Assuming you want to invite them.”

“Oh, definitely,” Matt says, nodding a little too hard. “And Mox, but I can text him.” She thinks for a second – she wants to call the whole cheer team over, but then she’d have to invite the basketball team too, because Jamie would know. “Okay, just Mox, Kenny, and Adam. Don’t want to get too crazy.”

Nick laughs. “We should tell Kenny to bring Kota, just to see how much he’d freak out.”

Matt cackles. “Oh, he’d lose it. He’d shove his head in the lasagna to get out of that conversation.”

Nick texts Adam and Kenny, while Matt takes over for Mox.

Mom’s doing a birthday thing for me today. Want to come over for dinner?

Mox must have been holding his phone, because his response comes within seconds.

yes definitely ask her if she needs anything from kroger

Matt stares at the message. “Mom?” she yells up the stairs. “Mox wants to know if you need anything from Kroger.”

Their mom comes downstairs, dressed in a tee shirt and jeans Matt is pretty sure are both hers, but she likes the idea of sharing clothes with her mom so much she doesn’t care. “I mean, I do,” she says, twisting her hair up with a claw clip, “but, you know. I’m not going to ask my daughter’s boyfriend to pick up lasagna noodles for me. That feels a little weird. Tell him thank you for asking, though.”

Matt shrugs. “Okay.”

I think she wants to go and get her own Kroger trip. She says thank you for asking.

ok figured I cold ask. gotta get in good with the future in laws 😉

Matt’s heart flutters and she clutches her phone to her chest. All of a sudden she’s hit with a whirlwind of possibility, of what her life might look like ten years from now. She and Mox, living together in a little home. Maybe a dog and a cat, a kitchen with a big countertop. For activities. She giggles.

“Matt!”

She snaps out of her daydream.

“Earth to my dumb sister, hello! We need to leave now if we want a decent parking space.”

“Right!” Matt says. She gathers her backpack and coffee cup. “Right. School.” She swipes the keys from their bowl on the kitchen counter. “To school we go.”

Nick

“I always forget how annoying she is on her birthday,” Nick mumbles into his arms at lunch. “She just – she keeps talking and she never stops. Birthday this, and Matt that, and now we’re doing the dinner.”

“Dinner?” Cole says. Nick lifts his head to see him almost pouting. “I didn’t get invited.”

“Yeah, well, it was last minute,” Nick says with a sigh. “Kenny, Mox, and Adam.”

“Oh, well, I can obviously see why Mox and Adam are there, but why Kenny?” Kyle asks, stealing a noodle from Cole’s plate. Cole proceeds to elbow him in the gut. “Ow! What?! It was just a noodle?”

Nick stares as Cole stares at Kyle, who stares back at him, and then Adam groans.

“You three are exhausting,” Adam mutters. “Let me eat my noodles in peace, why don’t you.”

Kyle grins. “Oh yeah,” he says. “Eat those noodles.”

“Is that a sex joke?” Nick asks. “Because, if it is, it’s a really bad sex joke, and I think it makes me decide I don’t want to be your friend anymore.”

“Doubt it,” Kyle says, popping another one of Cole’s noodles into his mouth.

Nick rolls his eyes. “I’m so glad Matt didn’t invite either of you.”

Matt

She knows she went to all her classes. She’s sure of it. But she remembers nothing of the day. She gets spoken to no less than four times by three different teachers for being on her phone, but she passes a pop quiz and a math assignment, so she decides it’s worth it.

Practice is less than ideal, because Coach Rayne decided on a conditioning day, but even running a mile and a half didn’t ruin her mood. She cartwheels and bounces through the route, and only kicks Willow once. Luckily, being Willow, she just pokes at Matt’s ribs and promises to kill her later.

She’s hot and sweaty as she gets back to the gym, but Mox still beams at her when she comes into view. She’s pretty sure her entire heart explodes.

“Hey,” Mox says, sliding in next to her as they walk to the parking lot. “I gotta swing home to shower before your dinner, but I’ll see you then.” He doesn’t even hesitate as he leans in to kiss her forehead. “Mom needs the car to pick something up, so I might be a little late, but I’ll be there as soon as I can.” He darts off toward his truck. “Happy birthday!”

Matt skips her way to the car, adding a cartwheel or two.

“Um, hello!”

She turns to see Nick hustling from the gym. “Oh, hi, Nick.”

“You forgot me,” he huffs, stomping up toward the car. “You forgot your own brother.”

“I didn’t forget you!” Matt says. “I – I was going to swing around to pick you up.”

Nick rolls his eyes. “Sure you were. Sure.”

He’s in a horrible mood the whole drive home, gripping the door and hissing every time Matt takes a turn faster than a mile per hour.

“Are you okay?” she asks. “You’re all weird.”

“I’m fine,” Nick snaps. “I just need a shower.”

Matt resists the urge to ask how the heck a shower could fix a garbage attitude, but she rolls her eyes and walks in the door. Nick goes into the main house without another word, and Matt plays music as loud as she wants as she showers and gets dressed.

She decides not to spend too much time on her hair, because it’s ten minutes from when people are supposed to show up, and she rushes her makeup. She gets mascara in her eye as a reward, and has to give up.

Matt isn’t stomping as she makes her way into the kitchen, but she is frowning when she slips on a sock. Nick walks in. “Oh, perfect,” she snipes. “Nick, would you please pick up your disgusting socks?!”

Nick turns to her, with that stupid confused chicken look. “I just walked downstairs.”

“You have socks everywhere,” Matt says, planting her hands on her hips. “You could do something adult, like picking things up when you use them.”

“What – you leave your shoes everywhere, too!”

They bicker back and forth until they hear a knock on the door. Matt stomps over to the door and yanks it open to see Adam standing there, looking confused.

“Um. Happy birthday? I’m sorry?”

“For what?” Matt asks, stepping to the side.

“You opened the door all angry,” Adam says. He slides in past Matt.

Matt rolls her eyes. “Oh, that’s just because the house is a mess and nobody but me seems to notice.”

Adam blinks. “I, uh. I can leave. Come back later.”

“No!” Nick says. Matt has to fight the urge to roll her eyes. “I mean, don’t go. Matt, I’ll clean it up, okay?”

Matt nods. If Nick was going to be a lovesick, pining dork, at least it would benefit her. “Okay.”

She and Adam sit at the dining room table, and Nick follows soon after.

“All cleaned,” he says.

Matt beams at him. “Thank you.”

Kenny’s shows up next, joining them at the table.

“Mox not here yet?” Kenny asks, taking his jacket off.

Matt shakes her head. “No, but I’m not worried or anything. He said his mom might need the car so he’d be here as soon as he can.” She keeps her hand on her pocket, trying not to think the worst. She doesn’t have time to worry, though, as she hears someone come through the door.

“Sorry!” Mox says. “Sorry, didn’t mean to be late.” He shoves a bouquet of flowers in Matt’s face. “Happy birthday.”

Matt smells the flowers, partially because she has no option. “They’re great, Mox. Thanks.”

Adam, Kenny, and Nick make gagging noises as Matt and Mox kiss.

Dinner and dessert go off without a hitch. Adam’s on the other side of Mox, and the two of them are getting on like a house on fire.

“They seem pretty cool with each other now,” Kenny says.

Matt nods. “Everything after the…incident the other day, they’ve calmed all that down.”

Kenny nods, shoving a forkful of salad in his mouth. “Cool. That’ll make things easier for your brother, yeah?”

“What about me?” Nick asks, leaning past Adam and staring at Kenny.

“Nothing,” Kenny says, and he shoves another forkful of lettuce into his mouth.

“Oh, keeping secrets?” Adam asks. Matt knows that smile. “Hmm. What could you possibly be keeping from us?”

Kenny’s eyes widen as he chews. Matt’s not kind enough to change the topic, and she leans on her hand. “Yeah, Kenny,” she teases. “Are you keeping any secrets from us?”

“You guys are super annoying,” Mox says with a grin. “Matt, you’re not telling our secrets, are you?”

“Yeah, Matt,” Kenny says, in a mockery of her voice, “are you keeping any secrets from us?”

Matt doesn’t have any reason to blush, but she feels her face burn hot pink. “Oh, shut it.”

Adam laughs so hard he chokes on his lasagna.

Nick

Nick watches as Matt blows out the candles on her cake, and she looks more serene than Nick’s ever seen her. He watches, almost enviously, as Mox kisses the top of her head. The way she beams up at him…Nick misses feeling that way about someone who felt it back.

“I gotta pee,” he says, standing up. “Cut me a slice, okay?” He ignores the way his voice is unsteady, the tiny shake in his hand.

“Yeah, okay!” Matt says, eyes still locked on Mox’s.

He scrambles to the bathroom and shuts the door. He doesn’t know what he’s feeling, is the problem. He’s frustrated and confused and sad. He’s jealous and angry about it. He’s a coward when it comes to Adam, and he’s angry about that, too.

He’s too scared and too worried and it’s not fair.

He jumps half a foot at the knocking on the door. “Uh, just a second!”

“It’s just me,” says Adam gently. “Wanted to check on you.”

“You wanted to check on me peeing?” Nick jokes, voice unsteady to his own ears. “I promise, I know how to work a toilet.”

“Come on, Nick. I know you better than that.”

Nick groans and pulls the door open. “I’m fine.”

Adam’s smile is knowing, and a little sad. “You’re not. Is this about Jude?”

“What? No.”

He raises an eyebrow. “So you’re hiding in a bathroom during your sister’s birthday party, right as she blew out the candles with her boyfriend next to her, just for fun?”

Nick can’t meet Adam’s eyes. “You don’t need to rub it in.”

“I’m not rubbing it in,” Adam says, leaning against the door frame. “Jude bailed on you on your birthday last summer and didn’t tell you why until you called him a few days later.”

“I know.”

“So, obviously, you’re gonna feel some type of weird seeing Matt’s boyfriend be all sweet.”

Nick looks up at him. “I told you he didn’t even pick up my call, right?” He’s choked up. “Called me three days later, dumped me, and didn’t even say happy birthday.”

Adam’s smile is kind in a way that sort of hurts. “You mentioned it.” He holds open his arms. “Want a hug?”

Nick nods and falls into Adam’s chest. This time last year, hell, even over the summer, he wouldn’t have felt butterflies. He wouldn’t have wanted to hold on forever, wouldn’t have wanted to tilt his head up to catch Adam’s lips with his.

He doesn’t know when it started, but he sure as hell knows it’s not gone right now.

“Okay,” Nick says, stepping back before he can do anything stupid. “I – thank you, Adam. I feel better.”

Adam brushes his hair over his shoulder, and Nick’s entire body heats up. “Anything,” Adam promises.

Matt

“You got me a dress?!” Matt squeals, holding it up. “Oh my god, Nick, who did you bribe to help you have style?!”

“Mom,” Nick grumbles. The room laughs. “Okay, look, I don’t do the style thing. I defer to the experts.”

She thinks the best part of it is when the five of them are on the couch, watching old home videos while she tries to cover Mox’s eyes whenever she comes onscreen.vShe curls up in Mox’s lap as they watch a video of Adam and Nick doing a dance routine in their blowup pool in fourth grade, and Matt’s never felt happier.

Friday, March 14th

Matt

“What’s got you so excited?” Matt asks Adam as they pass in the hallway.

“It’s pi day!” Adam says. “You know. Like pi? The number?”

“I take statistics,” Matt says. “I don’t do all that fancy calculus stuff.” She adjusts her dress. Now that she’s out to the whole school, she’s started trying out dresses. Her birthday gift from Nick, purple and swingy, fits right, but it’s very different. It’s not a bad feeling. Not at all. But it’s pretty weird to have so much of her legs exposed.

“It’s pi day, just have fun with it,” Adam says. “Cute dress, by the way. The purple looks good on you.”

Matt immediately forgets all her doubts about the dress. “Really?”

Adam nods, reaching out to adjust a sleeve. It’s so gentle and sweet that Matt almost beams at him. But she controls it, because Adam is practically Nick’s boyfriend. “Of course, Matty,” Adam says.

Matt reaches out and squeezes his hand. “Well, happy pi day, you nerd.”

“Ah, with the insults.”

“Not an insult!” Matt argues. “It’s. It’s a good thing! Nerd is cute. People go for nerds.”

Adam pushes his glasses up his nose. “Not everybody.”

“Look, if you like – someone, you have to tell them,” Matt insists. “He – they might be too stupid and obtuse to realize you like them back, so you’ll have to make the first move. Because that other person is dumb.”

Adam raises an eyebrow. “Whatever could you possibly be alluding to, dear Matty?” His expression is a little weird, a little understanding. A little too understanding, but Matt doesn’t have the time to dig into that between classes.

“You know exactly what I’m saying,” Matt says, poking Adam in the chest. “Make a move. He won’t.”

“Noted,” Adam says, nodding. “I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah? Cheer competition?”

Matt blinks. “You’re coming?”

“Course I am!” Adam says, looking almost offended at the thought he wouldn’t be there. “Haven’t missed one Spring Show, have I?”

“Usually they’re at our high school,” Matt says, adjusting the strap of her backpack. “This one is pretty far away.”

Adam shrugs. “And? I get to drive with someone who, according to you, may or may not like me.” He breaks into a grin, so wide it’s almost like he couldn’t resist it.

“Ah,” Matt says. “Right. My cheer competition is an excuse for you to flirt with my brother.”

“Why your brother?” Adam asks, feigning surprise. “What do you mean?”

“Oh, shut up,” Matt grumbles. But she gives him a quick hug before making her way down the hallway, a little more swingy in her purple dress than before.

Nick

“You said WHAT?”

“Calm down,” Matt says, checking her hair in the mirror. Nick might break it on top of her head. “I just suggested to him that somebody might have a crush on him. I didn’t say the person was you.”

“Sounds like you basically did!” he says. He thunks his head against the car window. “You need to worry about yourself, you nosy little brat.”

“You need to make a move on Adam before he panics and thinks you don’t actually like him.” Matt looks smug beyond words as she pulls out of the parking space and into the line of cars making their way out of the parking lot.

“He’s not gonna do that,” Nick insists, rolling his eyes.

“He might,” Matt says. She glances over at him, looking surprisingly understanding. “You really want to risk it?”

Nick curls in on himself. “No.”

“You need to say something,” Matt says. “At the very least, practicing saying it to yourself. Or me.”

“That makes it sound like you think you’re a part of me.”

Matt deflates. “I thought I was.”

“I mean – yes?” Nick has no idea how this has devolved so quickly. “You’re my sister. We grew up in the same room for, like, 17 years. Of course you’re a part of me. It’s just.” He shrugs. “I don’t know.”

They’re quiet the whole drive home.

#HangNick #MoxMatt #Hello look it's a birthday chapter that has ANGST #wtf i like wrestling now???#moxmatt high school AU #in which sara writes

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