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the-s1lly-corner · 10 months

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JONATHAN AND GN!READER AND THEIR ANTICS !!!!!!!

Antics w/ Jonathan and Reader!

I did a similar post yesterday!! (Linked at the end, hopefully, I'm mobile and sometimes tumblr can be weird)

I'm so so sorry it took my so long to get this request <\\3 I was trying to come up with new ideas so it could be different than the other ask <\3, which I highly recommend checking out! Imma be real I'm not totally confident in how this one turned out so that second post can be like an extra/make up <\3

I wasnt sure if you wanted this to be platonic or have them dating so!! It's mostly written as vague in that department!!

Jonathan doesn't strike me as the person who goes out and does things a lot

Just. Wake up, work, home, sleep, repeat.. he'll sometimes send texts to friends and family to schedule a lunch here and there but

That's about it, hes not very social

So a lot of these antics are really going to be made through you making the plans; with the shenanigans really being unplanned byproducts

Honestly I can totally see Jonathan starting shit with someone, be it accident or on purpose, prompting both of yall having to hightail it out of the area

Reminds me of that part from one of the diary of a wimpy kid movies, where greg n rodrick do that fake puke prank on the guy and have to make a run for it

Actually I can totally see yall subtly being menaces and fucking with people

Maybe not a fake puke prank persay but

Yk?

No crime stuff; I only really see that becoming a thing after he becomes Spot! Both from how he worded his whole "turning to a life of crime" thing and the fact he just

Lacks the experience and confidence

Moving on

Maybe it's just my "let's get silly with the writing" part of me, or it's my need for chaos (arguably the same thing), but

I feel like

Somehow, you guys would accidentally probably maybe kinda sorta

Wreak havoc in ways spot could only dream of (before doing the whole. Bouncing across the multiverse thing)

Yall could probably start the day wanting to go to some food truck and

End it by spending a night in jail

Neither of you are allowed anywhere near food trucks after that /j

No but serious note, Jonathan is basically a hermit, he doesnt like leaving his apartment unless he has to; people are just, so

Eeuuughchk!

So when you two hang out it's either his place or yours

But that's not to say it isnt fun!

Hes got normal stuff people have in their homes, like board games and consoles

And also science doohickies

Yeah people have that in their houses, that's a normal thing

Ngl if you give him any ideas for machines or whatnot hes totally going to give it a try

See previous post with a trans s/o, he would make the transgenderinator if you asked him to

Well now hes just turning into doof

Ykw

I feel like he'd take you to alchemax to show off stuff but like

If you asked nicely

How can he say no to that face?

And also he has no backbone

That's not to say you would pressure him, though! Because that's not cool, dont pressure people. But like, he would cave in the way of "I know it's not that serious and I know they'll probably understand if I say no, but I don't want to ever risk disappointing them ever in my life, so I'm gonna say yes!" Kind of way

He just like me frfr

And this is assuming you even know about alchemax

Which personally, unless you're in some way associated with it, I'm p sure be would have a strong boundary to keep you out of it

This is really just turning into a general ramble <\3

Anyways

I dont have many ideas since I struggle with general hcs like this but!! Yeah!! Definitely recommend the linked post for a better more cohesive (?) List of ideas and hcs!! This post kinda

Made me realize I dont have many hcs for Jonathan outside of making his personality a smart pathetic science man

Gotta fix that , give him some hobbies n stuff in the future

Link to a similar post!

#atsv spot #atsv #the spot #the spot x reader #spot x reader #jonathan ohnn #jonathan ohnn x reader

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oldmemoria · 7 months

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caught up with cringetober because I literally forgot to do it, individuals and explanations under cut

Day 1: Heterochromia I’ve come to the revaluation that my sona is already cringe as hell considering not only can his entire body change color but he also has differently colored eyes as a staple of his design. They’re usually yellow and blue but this time I color picked the blue from the trans flag and the mint from the Vincian flag for this color palette, it turned out really pretty :)

Day 2: Self Insert Now she isn’t my self insert anymore, but back in the day when I was at “peak cringe” she definitely was. This is my warriors OC Icypelt and I have a post going over part of her story on my profile somewhere. She’s been through a lot and I think her modern design is very pretty :)

Day 3: Unnecessarily complex fit/design Spider scene is kinda infamous in my brain for having wayyy too much detail but I love them and I think this might be my favorite one out of this batch, super cute, the pose is really cute and the colors are nice and fits her really well :D

day 4: Angel x Devil inevitable MCR reference ik, Helena and Revenge, love them dearly. Poor revenge man this one is cute and looks like a sticker!!

Day 6 (I skipped day 5 because I didn’t want to open up ms paint today): neko i kinda hate this one but cat Gerard yay

Day 7: Pinterest base at first I wanted to draw hobie in place of Gwen but I remembered that I haven’t really drawn Mikey with her even though they’re supposed to be friends so I drew her instead. Idk. The height difference is not accurate because of that but Jumping Spider is small because he’s based on a jumping spider and those are tiny who would have thought

Day 8: tumblr sexyman i have never played undertale a day in my life i just know a lot of people wanted to jump sans’ bones

day 9: Crossover ship/rarepair OH BOY THIS ONE GOES KIND OF HARD AND IM EMBARRASSED ABOUT IT BECAUSE THEY KIND OF WORK FOR EACH OTHER UM MIGUEL OHARA X CLOTTED CREAM COOKIE IM INSANE OMG-

day 10: fursona i already have a fursona I already drew and yes I colorpicked from the lesbian flag how could you tell /j

Day 11: Yandere LYLA is technically canonically a yandere because spoiler alert she tried to kill Miguel’s fiancé via overheating her in the shower (essentially literally boiling her like a lobster) because she was “in love” with him (she said if she did have autonomy and had feelings the would be in love with him but she doesn’t but idk who knows I don’t).

day 12: niche interest ik MCR isn’t exactly “niche” but the black parades story in particular has always caught my interest and I have my own interpretation of it and a whole kind of story I’m still developing and character arcs and headcanons and interactions and yeah you get it, death in particular has evolved into god knows an OC on his own I just keep him attached to MCR because… it makes more sense that way, ig-

day 13: creepypasta does this count- whatever grimdark is just the same thing as a creepypasta- I’m not really in the MLP fandom anymore but it was my first ever “fandom” I was actually apart of. My first hyperfixation if you will. I wasn’t in the grimdark part of the fandom because I was too young for it but I was actually watching the izzzyzzz grimdark video and I was like “oh” and drew a rainbow factory Rainbowdash. Honestly I should draw ponies more they’re fun to draw

Day 14: candygore (?) im not good at drawing candygore and since I was rushing this o didn’t do it as well as I thought I can, but it still turned out pretty cool

Day 15: song lyrics aaaa inevitable hesitant alien drawing this one turned out so cute!! The colors and the sparkle eek so cute aaa action cat lyrics I’m breaking down right in front of you I’m sorry

planning on doing the rest of the month now, maybe not exactly on time since I’m still in school but I’ll try to get 31 drawings out by Halloween. Love the idea of cringetober because I just love all things cringe. Ack this is so good

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hiroshotreplica · 7 months

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i would love to hear about ur Hiro thoughts if u wanna share :3

hiro.... where do i begin...... (btw no coroika stuff sorry. from what ive seen the characterization there does not line up with any of my promo kid brainrot at all LOL. also they turned kayoss into an inkling there lol???)

love him so much you dont even know. i memorized his username (Hirooooo) i think he's cool. i like his inkless office drone title it implies so much about him. projected some of my traits onto him a very long time ago, so he's an autistic trans guy to me. maybe bi. ive mentioned it before but i think he wears his ocho octophones outside of battle and theyre noise cancelling. i think he needs that feature for battles cause oh my goodness there's so many noises in battles sometimes.

of COURSE he uses .96 gal, its iconic as hell. but i think he uses like.. 3 other weapons too. splattershot, mainly because he's been shown with ttek splattershot + he's on the trizooka card (or at least the octoling there has a VERY close resemblance). i think he uses range blaster and dark tetra dualies cause he's been shown with them (the range guess is based on like. 20 pixels from a millisecond of footage though). also i use range and dark tetra..and i thought it was funny

also fun little thought i had the other day: i think he avoids .96 gal deco like the plague. was excited to see it get splash wall but freaked out about kraken royale. picked it up just to find out about the kraken part mid-match and got jumpscared by the transformation. enough to shove somewhere and never think about it again

i dont think he has like, a set in stone team or anything (i dont think any of the splat 3 promo kids do, they all play matches with each other n theyre all friends) but he usually teams up with anemoneno1, takotruck, and c4l4m4r. they have the most toxic synergy ever but thats another story. my interpretation of ane is its own thing too. i think they and hiro hate each other in the friend way. say the rudest shit to each other as a joke then laugh about it.

SPEAKING OF HIS RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHER PEOPLE. coming out as a hironika lover. i think he loves veronika so much its unreal. kind of boyfail type of way. they share an apartment w/ ane. sometimes i think about a poly thing between them but i like to think ane's just an onlooker to the frustrating chaos that is the two of them pining on each other in the most obvious way possible. theyre so t4t oh my god. (off topic but im a veronika she/they nonbinary believer forever. i think she's also a girl too but i dont know how to explain that. bigender, demigirl?? hard to label wish i could just let people peer into my brain on that.)

ALSO I LOVE NEO 3 VERONIKA BUT HIRO'S THE NEO 3 TO ME SORRY. my url gives this away so fast (hiroshotrepilca.. huh i wonder who hiro is). i think his smallfry friend would have the mohawk haircut. need more neo 3 hiro fanart in my life...

ok thats all i can put into words... a lot of this is going to show up in a thing im writing (I NEED A HIRO. posting it on ao3if anyone cares) but Yeah. sorry for this being sooo long these thoughts have been brewing in my head for like a year

#ask #long post #alex's hiro folder #i have SOOO much more to say but im bad with language so itll be in my head. for now..#his dynamic with veronika and ane is so important to me tho #surprised i dont draw it much. i literallyjust think about it a lot #ive even dreamt about it thats the crazy part

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huraiyra · 10 months

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HI! TELL ME ABOUT QUARTZ I BEG YOU!

IM IN LOVE WITH YOU NO ONE'S EVER WANTED TO HEAR AB MY OCs *CRACKS MY KNUCKLES*

... Im so sorry I have autism and can't shut the fuck up when I write (essay incoming)

so Quartz is my babygirl and my favourite OC. fun fact he was originally a straight love interest in a CYOA story I was writing on gotoquiz.com in like 2012. how our stories grow with us

Quartz is an emo scene adult (30) with black and white hair that falls over his eyes and he has the all the lip and eyebrow and ear piercings and striped shirts under band t-shirts thing going on.

his edgy boi angsty backstory is that his mom was my worst nightmare ending for myself (forced to get married and have children and hating all of them forever and trying and failing to be a good mom and eventually just falling apart) and so his childhood sucked due to a mixture of neglect, abuse, and having to take care of himself and failing. he had a bestest friend named Hollis, and a little brother named Jade who was the light of his life, until he gets killed in a hit and run bc mom couldn't be bothered to pick him up after extracurriculars. this is Quartz's villain origin story so he ends up stealing his mom's shit and leaving home at age 16 to go off himself or die or whatever the fuck but then he gets possessed by a dude (Edward) who thinks he is pretty cool :)c Edward helps Quartzie murder the guy who killed his brother. Edward is also a 700 year old freak and jackass who ruins his life more by egging him on to steal shit, do whatever he wants (namely whatever drugs he can get his hands on), fight people who bug him, knife himself but not die, and also possessing and unpossessing him and leaving his body half immortal and half mortal (checkered, like his hair).

he goes to check in on his mom one day and finds her dead on the couch (either killed herself or wasted away, unclear) which understandably ruins his life (again) (x4)

after a good decade of alternative highs of possession and lows of freezing on the ground on Canadian winter nights, Edward decides to bring Quartz to a home for other similarly possessed people (my childhood dream of living in a house with a bunch of friends à la Teen Titans) who all love him to bits despite him being broken, moody, violent and dirty. they don't really see him like that, even though that's all he thinks he is. they see a guy who never got to be a kid whose actually really adorable and decent and has cool interests (see: his backpack full of drawings Hollis gave him, stolen metal and rock CDs, comics, tokens from his brother, his 8 pocket knives, etc), who gets excited about new things, who tries to clean up after himself and treat people with respect, and who might shove you but apologizes immediately afterwards.

theres a trans man who takes a lot of naps and gives really good hugs, a magician who accidentally became his mom friend, a strange famous bald girl who likes being as much of a bum as possible, a genius bubbly girl who decides everyone is her bestie, and a genuine and hopeful but miserable man (Dominique) who was just recently possesed and lost his fiance on the way to his uni grad.

Quartz is a deeply scarred human being by this point and wouldn't mind if they ALL blew up and died, and spends a long time running off and ditching them and having some weird toxic friendship with miserable man.

Dominique is weirdly drawn to him even though he's Magna Cum Laude and well-off and never known pain, but he loves how underneath all the jagged edges this guy is genuine and not mean and the way he talks ab things he likes makes him like it too. Quartz is weirdly drawn to what he sees as a melodramatic priviledged bitch who is really smart and cute and sweet and handsome and kind and adorable and nice to me and nice to everyone and I want him to smile forever FUCK.

Dominique uses the magic power he gained from the possession to heal his suffering just a little (through a mind link). Quartz becomes somewhat addicted to this until Edward convinces him it's fake and bullshit and doesn't matter and on the other hand Dominique's benevolent possessor is like are you fucking kidding me your Summa Cum Laude fiance just died and you're mosying it up with this freak and EDWARD??? (theyve always hated Edward) (but never did anything about it to keep the peace) you should be ashamed of yourself

it takes Quartz a LOT of help including having a home and food and peace, having tv and junk food and homemade food, having people who like him and dont hurt him, just being unpossessed and trying to detox and thinking and thinking and thinking and also a chance meeting with the suicide spirit of his best friend Hollis (not chance) (they were looking for him) to make him realise that even if everything in the world sucks and he sucks and pain is eternal, there's no way out of existence and becoming a suicide spirit will just result in endless cycles of rumination and torture and no way out. LIVING on the other hand? it guarantees always another chance for small joy and if there is any source of joy in the world including friendship, he should embrace it. there's no way out so you might as well try to ease your own suffering and enjoy the good. because there IS good

(ps. I spent 5 years writing the scene where he decides he doesn't want to kill himself, because I was going through the same shit, and it finally came to be when I stopped being actively suicidal. unfortunately unlike him I'm still miserable. hey whats my other name besides Sumi again...)

so he tells Edward to fuck off, has a big fight and Edward leaves for good, and then tells Dominique's possessor to fuck off, and it works and they are humbled and apologize and agree to stop being nosy and resume their promise to being kid to Dominique (and by extension, Quartz) forever again.

Dominique and Quartz end up able to talk and get to know each other and Dominique nurtures him and Quartz teaches him to loosen up and they end up little soulmates in that house and get married!!! everyone else is super supportive and love their two new additions, a smart genuine hopeful and loving man who studies a lot like Genius Bubbly, and a jaded but good man who needs a lot of help but is learning to live again

currently my beloved Quartz is taking antidepressants and going to therapy (it's working for him) and spending each day with a friend or reading (my love never finished high school) and chilling with his husband.

ummmmm tl;dr Quartz. I love him and cannot shut the fuck about him. I'm sorry. thanks for reading (or not reading)

#my ocs #pipe down moppet #tw suicide #THANKS FOR ASKING ANON I LOVE YOU..... I KNOW THERES A WAY TO TALK WITHOUT INFODUMPING I JUST HAVENT LEARNED IT.....#SORRY IF YOU WERE EXPECTING SOMETHING SHORT AND SWEET I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING #plz do nt steal and all that. he is truly the love of my life I love quartz he is everything to me #the metal part is all condensed into this metal song i LOVED as a kid and it still slaps it's radical hysteria by born #and iirc the iconic lyric is SUCK MY DICK OR DEATH and Quartz headbanged to that while Dominique was like WHATS WRONG WITH YOU (LOVINGLY)

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multiples-fandomswontkillme · 3 years

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~Metal Family headcanons~

These are like my... general hcs)? which means I didn't include my main hc that Glam, Ches and Vicky are polyamorous, married and started dating after Glam met Vicky, and absolutely everything that implies for the kids and the relationships between each member of the fam. Maybe I'll make a separate post for that or maybe not! Who knows lkfwnlfqnf

Glam

Bisexual

Glam has constant nightmares and ocasional night terrors ever since he ran away home and is an active sleep walker. Ches helped him through the worse ones when they were younger, and learned how to deal with them, always preferring not to wake him up but being with him until the episode passed. Vicky has learned how to deal with them, though she normally asks Ches for advice with it cuz she comes out short sometimes.

He has PTSD. I bet it's diagnosed too, he takes medication and goes to therapy, it doesn't mean he still doesn't have his bad days anyway. He's trying to get better.

Glam has talked to Vicky about his past, his father and his family. This is a direct contradiction of Alina's confirmation that Glam doesn't talk about it with anyone but man FUCK THAT. We love good communication in this house, Vicky tries her best to help him, but there's only so much she can do to help.

Glam enjoys gardening, cooking and making models, he also likes doing his make up, painting his nails and dressing up in fancy, extravagant clothes even if he has nowhere important to go.

He likes taking care of everyone's hair, and constantly helps Vicky brush her hair cuz there's so much of it, Dee when he gets stressed over how tangled it can get, buys Ches hair products so he actually takes care of it, and chases Heavy so the kid actually washes, untangles and brushes his hair.

This one is kind of weird, but I refuse to think any adult in the family is unarmed at any time. Glam owns a taser and pepper spray. They're bright pink and sparkly.

This man cried his eyes out while watching Coco. He's hell to watch movies with cuz he talks and predicts what's gonna happen during the movie, judges them with scores at the end and all.

Vicky

Also bisexual!

Vicky's the one who does everyone's laundry most of the time. She prefers it that way since she's the only one that knows how to wash their black clothes so the colors stay vibrant. (This is based on my gf shaming everyone but Vicky cuz their black clothes always look so muted and almost gray, but Vicky's whole outfit is always the same vibrant black colors, so we decided that neither Glam or the kids know how to wash dark clothes)

She has anger issues, if it isn't obvious. I think she also has PTSD, mainly survivor's guilt due to her surviving the accident her brother died in. She blames herself and cannot bear to talk about it, in some sort of deep denial. If she can't remember, it can't hurt as much, right?

She has scars on the right side of her back and her hip, from the road rash she got on her brother's accident, she never treated it due to grief and it scarred badly. Apart from that, the scar of the caesarean section from Heavy's birth. She doesn't really mind both of them, they happened, nothing to do about them.

She likes watching boxing competitions, brawling matches and motorcycle repairing on TV. Loves doing BBQ's and going to the pool. Also an enjoyer of teasing her kids, kissing and loving her husband at random times, spending time drinking and bonding with Ches and bragging about her family and punching anyone who thinks they're not that cool.

Not particularly a fan of make up, skirts and dresses or any traditionally femenine-perceived stuff. But has been making exceptions due to Glam and Ches being unashamed of being seen as femenine, and actually rocking the looks. The internalized misogyny is kind of slowly dissapearing.

Apart from the guns she carries in each arm (I mean her biceps, have you looked at the size of those?? She strong) she has brass knuckles on her at all times. Glam gifts her new ones sometimes, she loves having multiple choices to punch people teeth in.

Loves horror, thrillers and action movies. Falls asleep during rom-coms and dramas. Ironically, loves gossip and talking shit about people. Enjoys hearing Ches talks about the gossip going on in the nursery home even if she doesn't know who the hell he's talking about.

Rest of the family under the cut!

Heavy

Heavy is a trans boy! He doesn't know his sexuality yet though, he's still figuring himself out. When he's older, i think he definitely dated some men but had better luck with girls.

Heavy has had innocent crushes on some girls on his class before, but they never turn into anything more cuz he's not the best at expressing himself. He follows the bother-the-girl-to-death-until-she-hates-you gimmick, and unsurprisingly, it doesn't work.

I'm sorry to break this to u but Heavy totally had an among us phase, and uses so much reddit and twitch slang... You know he does.

Likes bullying and teasing his brother to death. You know that when Dee had his first romance, Heavy was ALL up in his business being a tease and a bad attempt at a wingman. He means well tho.

He's not squeamish at all. Also has great pain resistance. This kid has picked cockroaches with his bare hands and loves cats, of course the cats have scratched him. He's tough!

Grows up to be the charming himbo he was always destined to be.

Dee

I hc him as demisexual. Kind of inherited his dad's tastes for the takes no crap, intimidating but pretty kind of people.

Can't cook. He tries but he can only do basics like rice, cereal, chicken nuggets or eggs. Complicated meals always burn or don't taste like anything at all. It drives him crazy.

Dee was a quiet and very well behaved toddler before Heavy was born. He never threw tantrums or got whims. After Heavy was born though, and despite the fact he understood his brother was small and needed special care, he started craving attention often and cried and got mad at little things. Typical jealousy of the oldest sibling.

The first time Dee fell in love with someone, he didn't recognize it was love at first. He just thought his interest on the person was born out of curiosity and aesthetic attraction, but as soon as he realized he seeked validation and companionship, that he liked seeing them smile, that he wanted to protect them, that he yearned for more time alone with them and that he wanted more than what just a simple friendship implied, it was an instant 'oh hell no'. He wanted those feelings to get the hell away, but unfortunately, they were there to stay.

Canonically likes MLP, psychological and horror anime like Death note and Hellsing, so I'm deciding he also watched Death Parade, had a FNAF phase, is very into The Walten Files. This guy enjoys any kind of specially dark ARG's and knows a ton of lore of real crime, unsolved cases, ghost appearances and other stuff. Doesn't believe in the supernatural, but sure is entertained by it.

He's a mess at romance. Flirting? His attempts at compliments are hardly flattering. Giving gifts? The best he can manage is jewelry and you can kind of tell he asked his dad for help. Dates? He's so nervous he's silent for most of it, but begins getting comfortable and having fun if his partner really knows how to get him down from his negativity cloud.

Ches

Pansexual.

He's very good with kids. He has the patience of a saint and he's laid-back, chill and fun but still is an authority figure who knows how to put limits. Sure, he's gonna let the kids light up a house on fire BUT hey, now they know everything about fire precautions, burns and how to treat them AND how to get away with arson. What an educational evening, am I right?

Due to certain info from the "Goodbye" official comic, I headcanon Ches as depressed. I don't want to elaborate a lot 'cuz of spoilers, but... God, everything related to his mom fucking hurts, man. How did he deal with all that?

Ches has been Dee and Heavy's babysitter so many times he cannot count them with all his fingers. He learned how to put those kids to sleep almost immediately (Sing Bon Jovi's "This ain't a love song" and any cheesy love song in a slow lullaby style and they're out), which movie were their favorite as kids (Heavy loved 'Monsters Inc.' and Dee never looked away during 'Meet the Robinsons'), how to console them after nightmares (Heavy needed reassurance, sweet words, and to be with someone until he fell asleep again. Dee just had to be tucked in, get his nightlight turned on and kissed in the forehead). He practically raised those kids along with Vicky and Glam.

More than once, Dee and Heavy have slipped and called Ches "Dad". Ches immediately gets his shit eating grin on and answers "Yes, son?" and does a couple of dad jokes just to mess and embarrass them. He's actually very flattered and surprised at how proud of himself he is for being a father figure to both kids.

Has a scar on the left side of his forehead due to a bottle his mom threw at him when he was younger, around the time he met Glam. He hates the scar with passion, it's a permanent reminder of the fact she never cared, that's why he always keeps it covered with his headband. Gets sad about it sometimes.

Ches likes to spend his time with a group of grannies of the nearby nursing home. He genuinely considers them his friends and gossips and hangs out with all of them on weekends. Bingo, billiards, walks in the park, soap opera marathons, you name it. I even designed them, gave them names and backstories... God, i just love the concept too much. I'll make some art about Ches and his granny gang FOR SURE, you're NOT ready for them.

Carries a pocket knife on him at all times. This man grew up on a bad neighborhood and absolutely knows how to defend himself, he can be intimidating when he wants to be and will pose a threat if needed. He's fucking terrifying when genuinely mad. Just cause he looks harmless doesn't mean he is, darling.

That would be all!

#metal family #glam metal family #ches metal family #victoria metal family #chess metal family #dee metal family #heavy metal family #metal family glam #metal family victoria #metal family dee #metalfamily #metal family heavy

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nastyatticman · 3 years

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Uhh hi

Could you do just phone sex with billy lenz but with a male reader? And like showing both povs

Sorry if that too much

It’s not too much! I love this prompt 👀 I love writing Billy’s POV too, it’s fun!

This ended up way longer than I intended but I had a lot of fun with it! Enjoy :3c

Billy Lenz x male Reader

Warnings: voyeurism, crude language (it’s Billy Lenz after all). Reader is male, and it’s written vague enough to be trans inclusive. (Well, it works for me, but YMMV. Words like cock, hole, etc are used) 18+ Only

Things were tense lately - you were having an awful time at work, and it didn’t help that people were always rude about your work’s mask policy. You just couldn’t understand how someone would complain about having to wear a piece of cloth in the five minutes it took to order donuts, especially to you, who obviously had to wear one all day and stay on your feet the whole time.

It was stupid. People are stupid. You were just glad to get back to your apartment and lay down for a while. It was a little lonely, just you and the plants since your roommate was out to visit his girlfriend’s family. Not that you’d missed seeing him every day in quarantine.

No, you kind of appreciated the privacy. Today you were frustrated and couldn’t think of anything that sounded better than getting off. So you watered the plants, grabbed yourself a drink, and loaded up a video you bought recently.

You started off slow, rubbing yourself through your clothes as the guys started making out on the screen - the big screen, since you finally felt comfortable watching porn on your laptop. As things started to escalate, you undid your pants, finally stroking your cock directly. But, like all things today, some stranger decided to interrupt you.

The phone rang down the hall and you almost let it ring, but you remembered your friend was expecting a call from a place he’d applied to, so you had to answer it anyway. Ugh. You rinsed your hand quickly and picked it up.

“Hello?”

The line was silent, save for some heavy breathing. God, not this guy again... You weren’t sure who the mystery caller was, but he’d grown on you. First you thought it was your roommate’s friend Peter playing a prank on you (even though you’d met him and his girlfriend Jess, and they seemed serious, despite how out of his league she was). You didn’t know, straight men are weird.

But Peter denied it when you had your roommate ask him, so... And besides, how many straight men call their male acquaintances to proposition them for sex?

At this point, it was tempting - you didn’t have time to meet people since the lockdown began, and your roommate was out...

The man kept breathing, once in a while making a strangled noise like he was trying not to laugh.

“Are you gonna get to the point already?” you asked him.

He laughed. “You want my cock, you pig? Fuck - fucking whore wants my fat fucking cock, filling up his tight ass?”

“Oh, quit projecting on me,” you teased. “I bet you’d want me to fuck your ass, don’t you?”

He was speechless for a second, and you heard something that could be him swallowing hard over the phone. His response was barely audible. “Maybe. Y- yeah.”

You smirked, you didn’t know if that would work. “Yeah, if I were there you know what I’d do?”

He took a shaky breath. “What?”

“I’d bend you over for me, yeah,” you said, voice low. You couldn’t believe you were actually doing this, but you brought the phone into your room, laying back on the bed, your hand back to stroke yourself through your pants. “If - if you’re wearing pants I’d rip them off, I don’t fucking care. I’d spread your cheeks and eat your ass.”

You thought back to something he said on a previous call. “You like tongue fucking, huh?” The only response you got was his breathing getting harder, the sounds of skin slapping against skin on the other end. Hook, line, and sinker.

“I’d fuck you on my tongue, fill you up with it, so you’re ready to take my fingers,” you continue. There was a strangled moan on the other end. “Start you off with one, I bet you’d want another just as fast. You’d beg for it, huh?”

“Fuck me,” he rasped.

“Someone’s a needy little... pig, huh?” you asked. He made a noise like he was choking, almost, which made you nervous for a second. But he seemed fine by the way he kept at it. Only thing that was being choked was his chicken on the other end of the line, you were sure. “What do you have to say to that?”

Click.

The only answer you got was a dial tone. That dick hung up on you!

Well, shit, you were already there, you may as well... You put the phone down and laid back, stroking your cock again. You had no idea what that guy looked like, but the sound of him moaning and touching himself over the phone was more than enough to get you off...

The rest of the day passed normally. Unsurprisingly, you got a good night’s sleep after that.

After another grueling day at the workplace, you got back to your apartment. Your roommate wasn’t there, but you saw that he left you a note on the counter explaining he was going to see his girlfriend again. That was fine by you, you... wouldn’t admit it, but you were maybe hoping for another call.

What you didn’t expect was how soon it would happen.

—

Billy watched the man walking up to the apartment complex, and slowly made his way to where he’d been staying. There was a surprisingly large storage room that had decent phone reception, and it was easy to steal from the building’s laundry room bit by bit if you knew what you were doing...

He waited and listened, drumming his fingers on his thighs. If he was quiet enough, he could just hear the sound of you unlocking and closing the door behind you. Click. Locked again.

Billy flipped open his phone and checked the time. 4:45. Okay, he’d give you maybe 7 minutes to get comfortable before he called. He flipped the phone closed, and grabbed something to occupy himself. It just was a broken Rubik’s cube he swiped from someone who visited a few weeks ago, but it was enough to keep him from getting tempted and getting to the main event before he even got you on the line with him. Well, that and to keep him from agonizing over it. He’d never had someone take over like that with him... he had plenty of people tell him to fuck himself, sure, but none so far that had told him they’d fuck him themselves.

None like you.

Eventually he gave up trying to solve it for real and just broke the pieces off, assembling it in the right colors. 4:55. Time enough for you.

He picked up the phone, leaning back on the wall, and dialed your number. Waiting for you to pick up, he fidgeted with his fly and undid his pants.

“Hello?” came your voice on the other end.

“I’ve been thinking about you, what you said,” he started up, groping his hardening cock.”How about I return the favor and fuck your tight fucking hole?”

Your voice was like honey to him. “Oh? Tell me about it, piggy.”

He gritted his teeth, grabbing his cock harder than he meant to. “You’re the pig, you- you took Billy’s call, you whore.”

“Fine by me,” you said, cool as a cucumber. “Tell me about it, Billy. If that’s your name.”

Billy bit his lip, doing his best to get his cock out with one hand. “Wanna - I wanna shove you against a wall, Turn you around, cover your mouth so your fucking roommate can’t hear you moaning for me. Grope your thighs, pull your goddamn hair, how about that?”

“Sounds good, but you know what really gets me going?” you asked. “I want you to bite me. Can you do that for me, Billy?”

“Yes,” he replied instantly. “Bite you so hard I leave fucking marks for fucking days. They’ll know you’re mine, mine, mine.” God, he was hard, his cock was leaking already, and he just used it to lube his hand as he stroked harder and faster.

“Oh? Why don’t you make me yours then? You wanna come in me?”

“Of course,” he replied, barely letting you finish. “I’m gonna fuck your tight little hole so hard you can’t fucking walk for days, everyone’s gonna hear you moan for me so hard, like a whore, Billy’s whore. Yes, I’m gonna fuck you sore, fuck you raw, fuck you senseless, come in your greedy fucking hole.”

He was close, he knew it. And for once you didn’t have a wise guy response for him! He barked out a laugh and imitated your voice almost perfectly. “What do you have to say to that?”

You didn’t respond fast enough, and it only made him cackle.

“I’m c-close, I’m gonna come,” he said. “Think about me flooding your tight little hole, you pig.”

He came, finally, and moaned into the phone for you. He played it up a little, for your benefit of course. He wouldn’t admit that was the hardest he’d come in a while.

You were close to follow him, and he sat there, panting, listening to you come down from your peak. He snickered. “Good piggy.”

“Same time tomorrow?” you asked, half joking.

“Yes,” he said instantly. “I’ll meet you, how about that?”

“Fuck yes, please,” you said. “Wait, how would you know where to meet me?”

Click.

Despite his abruptness, Billy was nothing if not a man of his word. Of course, you wouldn’t find that out until tomorrow...

#nasty attic originals #billy lenz x reader #slasher x male reader #lemon #nsft #any chance i get to trash peter in a black christmas fanfic is a chance i take #don't worry let's say attic man is vaccinated

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scorpio-hotch · 2 years

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Dharma's Ex

I wrote a trans greggie fic!! As always thanks you to @softhairedhotch for helping and inspiring me <33 Writing this made me so happy, I hope you enjoy :))

Cis people please don't be weird!!

Trans!Greg Montgomery x Trans masc!reader

Word count: 3.5k

Content/warnings: smut (18+) oral sex, fucking with a strap, eating, the reader and greg both have had top surgery and is on t, all the characters are trans btw

You had wanted to move to San Francisco for a long time. As a queer trans man, you knew it was a place that would accept you. Not to say there were no problems there, but it was better than most other places. You had made the move a few weeks ago and you are finally getting settled. The apartment you lived in wasn’t great by the conventional standard, the elevator was always broken and the neighbors seemed a bit strange, but you liked it. It was quirky.

One day, you were making your way to your apartment when two of your neighbors made their way to you. “Hey! You’re queer right?” the taller of the two said “Well you obviously are but- oh no, wait, sorry, that came out super wrong! I’m queer too, trans, ya’know, and so is my friend here.”

You stand there very confused.

“Oh I’m Dharma by the way, you can use she or they pronouns, I don’t really care. And this is my friend Jane, they use they/them. Who are you?”

“Hi…?” you greet them, before introducing yourself.

“So are you new to the building?” Jane asks.

You nod, “Yeah, I moved in last month.”

“That's cool,” they replied.

You smile. Your new neighbors seem friendly. Jane turns to Dharma, “We gotta invite him to the party tonight!” they shout.

“Oh my god, we do!” Dharma turns back to you, “I’m having a party tonight at my apartment, you’ve gotta come! I think you’ll like it!”

“I’ll try to stop by,” you tell them.

“Great! I’ll see you there, it was nice meeting you!”

“You better come!” Jane shouts back at you as they go.

A few hours later, you decide to go to Dharma and Jane’s party. You go up to their floor and knock on the door. After a moment, Dharma opens the door. “You came!” they exclaim, “I’m so glad you could make it. Please make yourself at home.”

She pulls you into the apartment. It was interesting, which made sense. The room was full of people, most of them looking some flavor of queer or at least different. Dharma left you to go talk to someone else. After a few minutes you heard them again. “Hey!” Dharma yelled from across the room, grabbing your arm, “I’ve got someone I want you to meet! He’s my ex husband, you’ll love him- and you’re just his type.”

You let out a confused laugh, “You’re trying to set me up with your ex husband?”

“Yeah,” she said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

She pulls you across the room to a tall man with dark slightly messy hair in a green button down. He looked good, “Gregory!” she called out, “Meet this guy I met in the hallway today.”

“Dharma, I told you not to invite random strangers into your house anymore.”

“C’mon greg, just look at him,” she squishes your face, “he’s a weirdo just like the rest of us.”

Greg finally glances down at you. His face softens and he smiles at you. He puts his hand out to you, “Greg Montgomery, nice to meet you.”

You smile back, shaking his hand and introducing yourself. “So I hear you’re Dharma’s ex husband?” you ask.

He looks down and huffs out a little laugh, “Yeah I am,” he looks up at Dharma, “It’s a really long story.”

They both let out a little laugh. Dharma put her hands on both of your arms, “Well I’ll let you boys chat, have fun!” before walking off.

Greg turns back to you with an amused little smile on his face, “So she found you in the hallway today?”

“Yeah, I just moved into the building a few weeks ago, they asked me if I was queer.”

“They can be a little much sometimes. I’m sorry if they offended you.”

“Don’t worry about it, I am queer, trans too.”

He smiled at that, “Me too.”

“That's cool,” you respond, “I think I’ve met more trans people today, that I have in my whole life.”

You end up sitting down with Greg and telling him all about your trans journey. He listens intently as you tell him about starting testosterone and getting top surgery. After a bit, he starts telling you about himself. “I started t without telling my parents when I was 16.”

“How’d you manage that?” you ask.

“I don’t even know. Eventually they caught on and I had to come out. They didn’t really get it at first, they’re the upper class type who’s all about appearances. But they eventually came around, my dad before my mom. Then I got top surgery at 18 and everyone’s pretty supportive.”

“That’s nice,” you tell him, “And that was all over ten years ago?”

“Yeah, it’s crazy to think about.”

There's a lull in the conversation. After a minute you end up saying, “You really seem like a Greg.”

“Really?” he chuckles.

“Yeah, it’s cute and dorky-” you say before you realize the words coming out of your mouth, “Sorry for calling you dorky.”

He lets out another laugh and rests his hand on your arm, “It’s okay. You called me cute too.”

You smile up at him. You can’t help but feel connected to him. When you looked in his eyes it was like you saw some kind of recognition. It was strange but nice. After a moment of silence he says, “Your name suits you well too, it’s cute… like you.”

You feel your face heat up, “Thank you.”

You spend a while more talking about everything. You tell him about your job and your move to San Francisco and your life before that. He tells you all about his family and his job as a lawyer and about going to Harvard and Stanford. He also tells you about how he and Dharma were married for a year and a half before deciding to split up. “I love her, she’s my best friend, but we’re better off as friends,” he says, a fondness in his voice.

He tells you all about how their families are so different but are still close. “You’d love Abby and Larry,” he tells you, “If you keep hanging out with me and Dharma you’re bound to meet them.”

You smile at him softly, “I hope I keep hanging out with you.”

His eyes meet yours. There’s a softness to them. You can’t help but think about how beautiful their warm brown color is. His hand brushes over yours. His fingertips are warm and soft. “Do you wanna go get something to eat?” he asks.

“And just leave the party?”

“Yeah,” he says as he gestures to the lively party around you, “No one will even notice we’re gone.”

You smile, “Okay, let’s go.”

He smiles back, taking your hand in his. You both get up and make your way to the door. As he gets his jacket from the coat rack, you look back at the rest of the party. Your eyes meet Dharma and Jane who are both smiling widely at you giving you a big thumbs up. You drop your head and as you blush. Greg turns back to you and squeezes your hand, making you look up at him. “Ready?” he asks.

You nod. He smiles at you before opening the door and leading you out.

You make your way outside and to Greg’s car. He starts the car and begins backing up before asking you, “Anywhere you wanna go in particular?”

“Nope,” you tell him, “I’m still so new, I don’t really know anywhere.”

“I know the perfect place,” he tells you.

After driving for a few minutes, you pull up at a small diner. It looked quaint. Greg puts the car in park and gets out, you follow his lead. You hear a little ding of a bell as he opens the door. He holds it for you as you walk in. The two of you sit down across from each other at a booth and a waitress brings over menus.

Without even looking at the menu Greg tells her, “I’ll have a coffee and a slice of blueberry pie.”

She looks to you. “I’ll have the same,” you tell her.

A few minutes later she comes back with the coffees and pie, telling you to enjoy.

“So why here?” you ask, taking a bite of the pie.

“What do you mean?” he says, taking his own bite.

“This place has the best pie in San Francisco,” he tells you, “The second best pie I ever had.”

“Where’s the best pie you ever had,” you chuckle out.

“Reno,” he says.

You send him a questioning look. “It’s a long story,” he explains.

You sit for a while eating your pie and drinking your coffee. “I just think pie is a good first date,” he says, sipping his coffee.

“This is a first date?” you smirk.

His face flushes red. “I- I didn’t mean to assume,” he stutters out.

You chuckle and take his hand in yours, “Don’t worry,” you tell him, “I’m glad it's a date.”

He smiles at you, cheeks still red. You keep hold of his hand as you continue eating. It was nice. Not much is said while you eat. The silence was comfortable. It was nice to just be with him. After you both finish your pie he insists on paying. “It was really good pie,” you tell him as you walk out of the diner.

He smiles warmly at you, “I’m glad you liked it.

You make your way back to his car. You sit there for a minute after he starts the engine. You glance over at him, his eyes are already on you. You can’t help but admire his warm brown eyes. You think about how beautiful they would look in the sunlight or in the early morning after a goodnight of sleep. You spend a while longer just looking at each other before you let out a small laugh, “I’ve never done anything like this before,” you tell him.

“Me too- I mean, no… that- that's a lie, sorry, i just- i don’t… i don't know why, this is just- oh boy, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-”

You lean forward pressing a soft kiss to his lips. As you pull away his lips chase yours and he cups your face with his hand and kisses you again. His lips are so soft and warm against yours. You could kiss him for the rest of your life and you’d be a happy man. Your hands make their way to the back of his neck, threading through his hair. You lean farther over the center console to be even closer to him. This time he pulls away. You’re both breathless with smiles on your faces as you press your foreheads together. “I-I’d like to keep doing that,” he breathes out.

“Me too,” you tell him, pressing another short kiss to his lips, “We can go back to my apartment… if you want?”

He pecks your lips again before sitting back in his seat. He takes the car out of park and begins driving. You can’t help but giggle at his eagerness. “What?” he asks, a smile on his lips.

“Nothing,” you laugh, “You’re just cute.”

He chuckles, taking your hand in his as he drives.

The drive is short. He parks the car and immediately pulls you in for another kiss, more desperate than before. You pull back, “Upstairs,” you mutter out.

You both make your way out of the car and inside. You’re both smiley and giddy as you take his hand and guide him to your apartment. You stand outside your door digging through your pockets looking for your key as Greg stands behind you with his hands on your waist, pressing kisses to your neck.

You finally find your key and unlock the door and pull Greg inside. You push him back against the door and kiss him deeply. His arms wrap themselves around your back, pulling your body flush against his. “Bedroom,” you’re able to mutter out against his lips.

You pull him back from the door and attempt to get to your bedroom without taking your lips off his. You stumble your way through your apartment but eventually you make it to your room, immediately pushing Greg back onto the bed. You straddle his hips as he lays back, your lips still connected. His big hand runs over your back under your shirt. You attempt to undo the rest of the buttons of his shirt. He sits up a bit to help you push the shirt off, leaving him in just his undershirt. “Too many layers,” you mumble against his lips.

He lets out a small chuckle before reaching down and pulling the shirt off. You sit back to look at his bare chest. He’s beautiful. You can’t help but stare at the long pinkish scars that run across his chest. You can see the self consciousness on his face at you staring. You pull your shirt off too, revealing a similar set of scars. He lets out a breath and moves his hand to touch your chest. His thumb brushes over one of your scars. “You’re so pretty,” he whispers out.

Your hand touches his scar, “So are you.”

You lean down pressing a soft kiss to his lips before moving to press kisses to his jaw and neck. His arms wrap around you and he lets out a small moan as you suck his skin in just the right spot. You make your way down his neck and chest, leaving a trail of hot kisses in your path. When you get to his scars you press a few soft kisses to each before making your way down his stomach, stopping when you get to the top of his pants. You look up at his face which is all flushed red. “Can I?” you ask, reaching for his belt.

“Please,” he sighs out.

You make quick work of his belt, pulling his pants off, leaving him just in his boxers. You press a few kisses to his thighs before asking, “Is there anything that makes you uncomfortable or you don’t want me to do?”

He pulls you up, giving you a deep kiss. “Anything you want,” he reassures you.

You smile, pressing another kiss to his lips before settling back between his legs. You look up at his face one more time before pulling his boxers down revealing his hard t cock. You press a few more kisses to his thighs before giving him just what he wants. You run your tongue through his wetness before teasing his t cock with your mouth. He lets out the prettiest sound you ever heard as his hand shoots to your head, gripping onto your hair. You give it a few more teasing licks before sucking it into your mouth. “Oh god,” he moans out, tugging at your hair.

His legs shake as you swirl your tongue around the sensitive area. His little moans and whines push you to move faster. Your hands grip onto his thighs so tight there will surely leave bruises.

You lose yourself in between his legs, enjoying giving him so much pleasure. You lick through his wetness, moaning at the taste of him before wrapping your lips around his t cock once again. You can tell he’s close. “Cum for me, baby,” you tell him as you suck hard on his t cock.

He let out the prettiest high pitch moan as he cums on your mouth. His whole body tenses before he goes limp. You press one more kiss to his t cock making his hips jerk.

You sit up wrapping your arms around his shoulder and press your lips to his. “What do you want now, baby?” you ask.

“I want you-” he stutters out, “I want you to fuck me.”

You smile and kiss him deeply. You reach for your bedside drawer as you kiss him, feeling around for what you need. You pull out your strap and harness. Pulling away from the kiss you sit back pulling off your pants and boxers and getting into the harness. You make sure it's all secure before kneeling over Greg. You run your hands up and down his thighs before asking, “Ready?”

“God, yes,” he moans out.

You tease the strap between his legs a few times causing him to let out a small little whine before you line the cock up with his entrance, pushing in slowly. Once you’re fully in, you still for a moment, leaning down to press a kiss to his lips as he adjusts. After a moment he starts whining into your mouth, “Move, please.”

You start with slow thrusts as you try to get a rhythm. You can feel the strap rub up against your t cock with every thrust. You start to speed up, leaning forward so you are chest to chest with Greg. His arms were tight around you, clinging to you. You could feel all the moans and sounds through his chest. It just urged you to go faster and harder.

“I’m close,” his voice higher than before, “so so close.”

You keep fucking into him, fast and stready. You bring your hand between your bodies to jerk off his t cock. You were pretty close too, from the feeling of the strap against your t cock and just the image of Greg falling apart under you. His legs shake and his arm tense around you as he cums with the prettiest moan. You fuck him through it, trying to make it last as long as you could.

When his sounds of pleasure turn into discomfort, you slow your thrusts to a stop. You take a moment to just hold each other. Greg was compleatly fucked out. His body limp and his eyes blown wide. You didn’t think it was possible for him to get more beautiful than he was when you met him but you were wrong

You brush his hair off his sweaty forehead. “Feel good?” you ask, your hands playing with his hair.

“Mhm,” he hums out.

You stay like that, just holding each other for a moment. Greg breaks the silence, “You didn’t finish.”

You brush your hand over his side, “It’s okay.”

He sits up slightly, moving you to his side, “Do you want to?”

He lays you back on the bed, “Don’t worry about it, there's always next time.”

“I like the sound of next time,” he says as he hovers over you, “But I wanna make you feel good right now.”

He presses kisses to your neck, making his way down your body. He shows some sweet attention to your scars. He kisses all the way down your tummy. When he gets to the bottom he gently helps you take the strap off, before pressing kisses up your inner thigh.

He takes a moment to just look at you before pressing a kiss to your t cock. You jerk your hips up at the feeling. He lets out a small chuckle into your skin as he wraps his arms around your thighs, keeping you in place. You can’t help but moan at the feeling of him wrapping his lips around your t cock and swirling his tongue around it. He starts bobbing his head up and down. You get lost in the pleasure. His mouth feels so good. Your hands make their way to his hair, tangling themselves in the soft strands.

He continues to suck your t cock. You feel the pleasure building inside you. You’re so close. You tug on his hair making him moan around you, pushing you over the edge. You moan out, clinging onto him in whatever way you can.

As you come down from your high, you feel Greg pull off of you. He lays next to you and wraps you up in his arms, pulling you to his chest. He presses a sweet kiss to your lips. You can taste yourself on his tongue. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, never wanting to be apart from him again. After a moment he pulls away from the kiss, resting his forehead against yours. You both have sleepy smiles on your face. “We slept together before marriage,” he chuckles out.

You pull back a bit, “I’m sorry,” you start to apologize, “I didn’t know you were religious. Fuck- I’m so sorry-”

He presses a kiss to your lips, “Don’t worry, I was kidding… well kinda, I wanna get to know you before I marry you.”

You get a grin on your face and wrap your arms around him again, “So you wanna marry me someday…?”

He smiles back, “Yeah, someday… At least a month or two.”

You press a giggly kiss to his lips. “I think I can wait a month.”

“Good,” he responds, kissing you back, “I look forward to you being my husband.”

“I look forward to you being mine.”

#hehe i hope you enjoyed :))#thanks for reading :))#i am once again asking cis people not to be weird #i am a trans man and i wanted to write a t4t fic about greg #this is not an invitation to say any weird or transphobic shit #<33 #greggie <3 #trans!greg <3 #greg montgomery x male!reader #greg montgomery x reader #greg montgomery #dharma and greg #dharma and greg t4t #greg montgomery fic #jase's fic :)

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reginaofdoctorwho · 3 years

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if anyone wants to recommend musicals to me I would fucking adore that. Until then, here are some suggestions:

Love in Hate Nation-- LET’S GO LESBIANS! 1960s sapphic love story taking place in a girls’ reformatory. Also, trans girl played by trans actress!!! Some of the amazing songs are “I Hope” and “Oh Well”. Susannah Son wants to be a singer, her performative activist boyfriend is gross and also wants her to marry him so he’ll have better options politically. Sheila Nail is so fucking cool and I love everyone in this. My brain cuts out about this I’m so sorry babes. There is not a cast recording but there IS an original cast bootleg on youtube.

Holy Musical B@man!-- If you liked the goofiness of 1960s Batman and Robin, but think “man, these guys should’ve been able to swear! And also should have had a candy themed villain!” this is the musical for you. Also if you’ve heard of the very queer Harry Potter musical that JK herself tried to sue over, it’s made by the same group <3. As usual with Team Starkid, whole thing is up for free on youtube by the creators.

Firebringer-- Speaking of the same group... Cave people sapphics who I think are bi or pan. I love them and they’re all so dumb. Also, if you’ve seen the “I don’t really wanna do the work today” vine, that comes from this. I do not remember any of the second half other than one of them taking the ring the other is proposing with... to propose. And the “*blows kiss*” “fuck no, Zazz” “duly noted”. Kind of like a shitpost musical. Once again, free by creators. Actually, check out any of their musicals.

The Prom-- In Indiana, Emma just wants to take her girlfriend to the prom, and in response, the PTA cancels it. With some help from some broadway actors looking for good publicity, they manage to pull it off. So, to summarize, teen lesbian gets gay uncle who knows what she’s going through!! This musical makes me cry every goddamn time. There is a movie now, and I’m very happy about that because *high profile gay rep on netflix*, but I personally did not like the direction they took with it. They put a weird amount of emphasis on biological rather than found family in the movie, and were a little too forgiving when it came to trauma from family for being gay. Also, they took away Emma being butch. This was sadly (loosely) based on a recent true story from I think 2012. Also, was the first gay kiss in the Macy’s parade. You know those movie musicals the straight girls in theater like? The music is similar, but gayer, and for some reason that makes me so fuckng happy. I think it’s because non-queer people have had musicals for so long, and those normally have a 60s vibe, and the music in this does too and it feels more classic?? Sapphic promposal song (het at the beginning). “Unruly Heart” and the end of Act 1 will break you. Please ignore the bad wigs.

Spies Are Forever-- GAY SPIES GAY SPIES GAY SPIES!! Curt Mega (played by... Curt Mega) lost his partner Owen during a mission. Now, he’s just trying to get back into spying like Owen would want. I fucking weep every time. Also, a song about comphet (at 6:36)!! And here is a video essay on how it relates to the Lavender Scare. I want you all to know that everyone also headcanons the femme fatale spy in it as either a lesbian or aroace, which uh, makes sense. Also high quality videos put up by creators. They had Jewish people making fun of Nazis while writing this, but “Not so Bad” is... kinda bad. “Torture Tango” has so much goddamn sexual tension and becomes devastating.

Hadestown-- If you know the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice, it’s like that, except capitalism part 1. Orpheus is a poor musician, Eurydice dies, just like the myth. Except, the Great Depression post-apocalyptic setting that works better than it probably should. There are actually 3 soundtracks: the concept album, off-Broadway, and Broadway. I personally don’t like the concept album purely based on vibe. Off-Broadway has an absolutely gorgeous sounding Orpheus, and if you’ve heard of the disaster that was Spiderman: Turn Out the Dark, then you’ve heard of surprisingly amazing Broadway Orpheus Reeve Carney. The Fates are gorgeous and I’ve decided they’re queer. Tony’s performance link here. Explores relationships, with Hades and Persephone’s aging relationship mirrored by Orpheus and Eurydice’s relatively new one. Anyway, unionize.

Jasper in Deadland-- If you know the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice, it’s like that, except capitalism part 2. Jasper is a teen who’s best friend Agnes is pretty much the one good thing left in his life. His mom left, he got kicked off the swim team (he’s manic pixie dream boy in this, especially for swimming), and Agnes dies at the beginning trying to show Jasper that she’s brave and he should be too. So, he bravely ventures into Deadland to find her, meeting Gretchen the tour guide along the way. He also finds out that since he’s still living, he can bring memories back to the dead. Songs like “Stroke by Stroke” (he’s uh, definitely a teen, guys) and “Living Dead” (I shared a prinxiety animatic of that on here a while ago).They blend Greek, Norse, Egyptian, Christian, and whatever Dante’s Inferno counts as together to create Deadland. Story’s kinda hard to follow from the soundtrack, so if u wanna learn how it all ties together message me.

Death Note Musical-- Okay babes, here’s where it gets tough. It was written originally in English, and there is a spectacular English concept album, but the only productions have been in South Korea, Japan, and I think Taiwan. Listen to it anyways, find a bootleg of it with english subtitles. It has so much gay tension and also a truly ethereal character who seems to be a lesbian who is also either demisexual or demiromantic. If any of y’all saw the anime like me, it kind of cuts out the arc after episode 26. I personally thought it was actually a better story for it.

Alice by Heart-- Okay, this one makes me fucking cry every goddamn time. In WW2, these poor goddamn kids are all alone in the Tube System (is that what y’all call it? genuinely asking here) with none of their parents but still some grownups. Alice’s best friend Alfred is dying of tuberculosis, and to try to have one last thing together they start reading Alice in Wonderland, only for Nurse Hart to rip it apart to try to separate healthy Alice from dying-from-TB Alfred. It doesn’t work, and Alice proclaims she “knows it all by heart”, She tries to linger in the story with Alfred to have more time with him, he keeps trying to move it along because he’s dying and wants to finish it one last time. Themes are growing up and grief I guess.

Last I checked, there is a bootleg for all of these on youtube. Have fun!

#love in hate nation #holy musical b@man #firebringer #the prom #spies are forever #hadestown #jasper in deadland #death note musical #alice by heart #i know more gay ones too if u want that

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spectrumed · 3 years

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7. identity

The aesthetic of suffering, the allure of victimhood, it’s important to acknowledge that to many people, the idea of struggling with mental illness is hot. A common trope in teen dramas is the existence of the sexy bad boy haunted by demons of depression or addiction or some other psychological malady. Women with mental illness tend to be sexualised, less, but then again, women are most typically always sexualised, no matter the state of their mental health. But it’s not just a case of some people finding mental illness to be attractive in others, many see mental illness in themselves as something to take pride in, to celebrate and nurture. To seek out a diagnosis, to infiltrate communities that exist to provide support to those in need, and to declare themselves as being special. Fakers, you could call them. Yes, we’re going to be entering into dangerous grounds here, talking about a potentially incendiary topic that might feed the flames of controversy, but it’s a topic worth discussing. Self-diagnosis. Is self-diagnosis valid or not? Should one self-diagnose? Is it ableism to be against self-diagnosis? Is it ableism to be for self-diagnosis? Is it ableism itself ableist? I don’t know, sweetheart, you are asking a whole bunch of questions and I am hungover… But let’s go on rambling about what it means to be labelled neurodivergent.

Do you have an identity? Do you root for a particular sports team? Do you like a particular kind of music? Do you dance a lot? Are you a dancer? What are you? Simply stating that you’re just “a human” probably won’t do. Sure, it’s correct, but I am also a human, and we could be two very different kinds of people. Your identity should be that certain something that makes you stand apart from the rest, that distinguishes you from the squirming mass of flesh that is the whole of humanity. There are plenty of things about you that do figure in your identity, even though you wish it didn’t. You’re black, you don’t wish to always be “that black guy over there,” but you’ve come to realise that’s just how society views you. Maybe you are a transwoman, and you very eagerly want your friend to stop introducing you as her “trans bestie.” You’re just a woman, you don’t need her to keep labelling you as trans, even though that's what you are. There are many ways we can change our identity through direct personal action. Maybe you could start wearing a hat, and be known as “that hat guy” to the people you work with. Maybe you could embrace a punk aesthetic, looking like young Johnny Rotten stepped into a time machine and got transported to the current day. Actions like these can have a big or small impact on how others see you, but it feels good to be able to make a decision like that and get a response. This is me, this is what I am. I’m the guy who wears bow-ties, don’t I look cool? If only shaping your sense of self always came down to personal decisions like that. You don’t always have a choice.

I’ve lately been watching some Conan O’Brien (American TV talk show host who’s recently decided not to be a TV talk show host) clips. I am sure I don’t need to explain who Conan O’Brien is to my readers, but just in case this is being read by aliens ten-thousand years from now, what I can tell you is that Conan O’Brien is well known for being freakishly tall. Like, really tall. He’s an elongated leprechaun. He’s turned being tall into one of his trademarks. Like many comedians, he’s come to use his corporeal form as a source for levity and fun. While, naturally, the man did not choose to grow as tall as he did, he’s come around to use his height not as a hindrance to success, but rather as an asset. He’s “that tall irish guy on the TV,” and he’s been that person for nearly thirty years. It pays to have some distinguishing feature if you wish to be distinguished. Mr. Joe Average might be perfectly funny and charming, but being an average-looking guy can be wholly detrimental in making a career for yourself as a funnyman. At least get yourself some weird voice, or something. Maybe pretend to be some foreigner and put on a fake accent. As a comedian your job is to be exploited, you wish to be made into a commodity to be sold. People will want to watch your special because of that funny face you pull in the thumbnail. To be different can be financially lucrative.

What’s the best approach in turning something that could be perceived as an abnormal feature into something that is beneficial to you? To make jokes about it? Certainly, if I were to meet a man with a heavily scarred face, I feel there’d likely be a tension between me and him that could be dispelled if that man with the heavily scarred face made some little joke about his appearance, some little quip. “I’m sorry, I cut myself shaving this morning,” would do. The person isn’t obliged to justify his existence to me, he does not have to go out of his way to make me feel less uncomfortable. I am the one in the wrong, certainly. I shouldn’t look at a person with a heavily scarred face and feel uncomfortable, that’s me letting prejudices get in the way, I know that. But, it is what it is. If you’re looking for a practical solution, telling people to simply get over themselves and learn to not be so awkward around folks with physical deformities won’t do. It may be the right thing, but it’s not going to happen any time soon. I am sure that the man with the heavily scarred face isn’t interested in being defined by his heavily scarred face. He's probably sick and tired of that little joke, and wish he didn’t have to make it. But it does the job. Suddenly, you are not looking at something to be feared, the other, you are looking at a person, and someone with a sense of humour. The importance of humour in eradicating stigma, making it possible for the ostracised to enter in society, cannot be understated. Through humour, you can convince most everyone that you are someone worthy of inclusion, because… well, you’re just a funny guy, who doesn’t wanna hang out with you?

For those who have grown up not feeling normal, worrying that there are aspects of your character that others may perceive as unwanted, the yearning to be liked can at times become excruciating. I like to consider myself a funny person, while this blog isn’t intended to be a humorous one, occasionally small little jokes will squirm their way to the top, like worms coming up to the surface during a rainstorm. I am also a cartoonist, and produce a new cartoon every other day. My humour isn’t universal, no good humour ever is universal, but it’s done good in getting some folks to like me. Some people want to be admired, some people want to be feared. I only want to be liked. The one thing I absolutely do not want to be is pitied. I don’t want your pity, I fear your pity.

You’re probably familiar with The Sims, right? It’s a life simulation game, where you control a little digital human, known as a sim, and try to help them make the right decision through life. Each sim has a number of meters that measures their current needs. Hunger, hygiene, energy, if they need to urinate or defecate (though, frankly, the distinction between the two isn’t made in the game, so one can assume that sims are like birds and have just one cloaca that does both,) and so on. One of these meters is for social activities. If a sim hasn’t been social in a while, they go nutty. What’s interesting here, the reason why I bring it up, is that in real life, though we all (to a lesser or greater degree) crave to socialise with others, what kind of socialising you do is of a very big importance. There are a myriad of ways in which one can be social, and depending on your needs at the time, one kind of socialising may not do, whereas another kind of socialising may be just what you need. Do you want to hang out with your pals, cracking jokes and maybe drinking a couple of beers? Do you want to have a serious conversation with your partner about what you wish to accomplish together? Do you want to play with your dog? These different social situations scratch different parts of your mind, and you can’t just substitute one for the other and think that’s all alright. A person may have tonnes of friends, lots of buddies to spend their time with, but they may still desperately be yearning for another kind of social interaction, one that none of their friends can deliver. The human need for company is more complex than how it is depicted in The Sims… which, to be fair, probably shocks nobody. The Sims doesn’t pretend that it’s some highly realistic simulation of real life, it’s a game meant to be played for fun. But what’s important here is the fact that while humans do have a need to be social, how that need is fed changes dramatically on the person, and their conditions. Socialising that may bring comfort to one person, may bring discomfort to another person.

I don’t want you to pity me. I may list my diagnoses, I may tell you of the difficulties that I face in life, but I do not want you to feel sorry for me. I want you to be entertained reading this, I don’t want to make you weep thinking about how cruel life can be. I don’t want you thinking I’m special, or different, because of my diagnoses. I want you to think I’m special and different because of my writing. Sure, this blog is about living with autism spectrum disorder, but I don’t want you reading this blog just because it’s about autism spectrum disorder. I want you to read this because, while it is about a diagnosis you are interested in learning more about, you also find what I write to be well-written and at times, mildly humorous. This blog isn’t my rabid manifesto detailing all the ways my life sucks, and what must be done by society to appease me. Nah, I’m doing relatively fine, don’t feel bad for me, please. I don’t want that kind of attention. I do want attention, I won’t lie and tell you that I don’t have an ego, or that I don’t get pleased seeing people like the things I put out there. I do have a social need, it’s just that being pitied does not do it for me. It doesn’t make me feel good. It makes me feel bad. It makes me feel sad. It really makes me feel mad.

We’re finally getting around to the topic I promised I would discuss. Self-diagnosis. A principal concern people have with self-diagnosis is that people only self-diagnose in order to receive pity from others. The difference between someone like me, who’s got a proper official diagnosis, and someone who is self-diagnosed, is that I don’t want your pity. I don’t want you to fetishise my diagnosis, this thing about me that I did not choose to be. I don’t want special favours just because of my diagnosis, I don’t want to be known as “that cartoonist with autism.” I am autistic, I’ve come to accept that, but I don’t want anyone to introduce me as “their friend who’s on the spectrum.” Some may accuse me of self-loathing, treating being autistic like some bad thing that I am ashamed of. But that’s not it. After all, I did start this blog to discuss what it is like. I just don’t want to be defined by this certain something that lies outside of my control. I don’t want it to be my “thing.” I don’t mind being referred to as a hairy cartoonist, because I am pretty hairy. I don’t want to cut my hair any time soon (especially with this plague going around.) No-one would pity me just because I am hairy. At most they may regard me as a good-for-nothing beatnik, and I’m okay with that. Ideally, I still want to be liked, but anything is better than being pitied. To be pitied is to be robbed of your own agency, your own potential. Sure, it gets you that attention you may be craving, but at the cost of infantilization. Autistic people often struggle with being infantilized by society, to the point where some folks don’t even realise that there are autistic grown-ups in the world. Anyone who would voluntarily seek out a diagnosis just to be pitied, well… it doesn’t sit right with me. It makes me, quite frankly, feel demoralised.

But not all people self-diagnose just to get pity from others, right? For some it’s genuinely their only option, likely living in a barely-functioning country like the United States where receiving psychiatric care is expensive and it’s just not something they can afford. It’s unfair of me to phrase self-diagnosing as just a quest to receive pity, it’s way more complicated than that. And yes, I’d have to agree. To know all the reasons why a person may self-diagnose, you have to go personally ask them. Even if it is possible to highlight a few certain trends, things that they all have in common, it’s bound to be impossible to make this one sweeping generalisation to explain everything. All I am saying is that there absolutely are those people who do self-diagnose with the explicit goal of getting pitied. Whether they are knowingly faking their condition or not, to them, being pigeonholed as a person with autism isn’t at all a negative. It’s their identity. It is how they have chosen to let the world see them. They made a choice. They chose this label. This is why many people who have official diagnoses are sceptical of those who've only got a self-diagnosis. Whether your self-diagnosis is accurate or not, in the end, you chose to identify yourself with it. You made a decision, oblivious of the fact that many people don’t get to make that kind of a decision, and they may bear resentment for how you are turning something they’ve faced ostracization for, into what is potentially on the same level as listening to a certain kind of music, or being a supporter of a sports team. A diagnosis is not something you should choose to have.

There are other things to say about self-diagnosis. First of all, it can be dangerous. Some of the diagnoses I’ve seen people give themselves are really serious, things like personality disorders or psychosis. Psychiatrists are very careful when putting these kinds of labels on people, knowing the harm that it can do. A diagnosis is meant to only be given after careful deliberation, and after long conversations with the patient. Psychiatrists know that reducing a person to a set of symptoms can have detrimental effects to that person’s sense of self. If you’re trying to cling on to a diagnosis, seeing it as a major part of your identity, then that may hamper any attempts you make to become a better person, to improve your mental health. You will feel as if you need to correspond to the exact specifications of the disorder, and you will not allow yourself to grow naturally as a complicated human being, a human being whose internal life is far too vast to be fully rounded up with some psychiatric jargon. There are plenty of things about me that do not line up with the diagnostic criteria for autism spectrum disorder, and guess what, that’s quite good actually. It doesn’t mean that I don’t have autism, I very much do, but I realise that as a person, I am more than just my diagnosis. The diagnosis does not define me, I define the diagnosis. If you self-diagnose, do you comprehend all that you are getting yourself into? Are you going to find yourself in psychological traps that will only serve to worsen your mental health? It’s hard to look at yourself objectively, you could easily be misrepresenting yourself inside your own mind. You may effectively be locking parts of yourself away, making it so you are no longer able to see the full you. You will no longer be all there, you will be segmented in favour of upholding the defining marks of a diagnosis that doesn’t suit you.

Instead of self-diagnosing, try doing a self-assessment. Keep in mind that, while you may have this diagnosis, it’s too early to say for sure. You’re going to need somebody else’s input. You’ll need to sit with it for a while to see if it sticks. Keep an open mind, realise that there’s no easy way to explain exactly who you are, or what you are like. It’s very possible that you will come to realise that you are in fact autistic, or have whatever other diagnosis you may suspect describes you. I, after all, came to the conclusion that I was autistic before I got the diagnosis (though, I was going to therapy at that point, and I was on the way to undergo a neuropsychiatric evaluation.) It’s not bad to try and get to understand yourself, don’t come out of this thinking that self-reflection is only possible with a psychiatrist looming over you, telling you how to think about things. We all need to come to certain conclusions over how we self-identify, and sometimes you need to take mental leaps to explain certain things. Just don’t feel as if your best option is to put a label on yourself that can potentially negatively affect your psychological well-being. If you are truly searching for understanding, if your goal is to find out more about yourself, you should act with caution and concern for what you are doing. If all you are looking for is to have people pity you, then… well… I don’t know what to say, really…

#neurodivergent #neurodiversity #autism spectrum disorder #autism #aspergers #mental health #diagnosis

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hankwritten · 3 years

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Litany

Gen, 2k

Part of the DontNeedADiscord Pride Week, Day 1: Flag

“And what is the meaning of these?”

It was a good idea not to make Miss Helen pissy. She was the Boss around here, and not in the way Miss Pauling was the boss, but like the Boss with a capital B. I wasn’t exactly sure if she owned the building, or maybe the company, or maybe she was just our lawyer so we shouldn’t tee her off because of that, but the way Dell had explained it making her mad was a good way to have your desk packed by the end of the day.

So, I’d have to be very delicate about this. “They’re pins, Miss Helen,” I explained extremely politely. “It’s the first day of Pride Month; I thought everyone could do with a little company spirit!”

“Spirit?” The T on the end of the word popped like a firecracker. Miss Helen could make nice words like spirit or rainbows sound like she was actually saying dog doody. “And how exactly do these pins make you…prideful?”

“They’re fun!”

When she didn’t react, I at first assumed it was because she couldn’t hear me so well through my respirator, but then I considered what I knew about her and wondered maybe she simply didn’t know what fun was.

“Look,” I said, placing one in the palm of her hand. “It has a flag on it! I was thinking as people are coming in during the day, they can pick them out and wear them if they want to, just to show off a little color. See? This one is the bigender flag.”

She held it up and examined it like a jeweler inspecting a diamond. “And you find this…fun?

“Yeah!”

She waited, as though expecting the fun to start radiating out of the pin like a hand warmer. “…You certainly have quite a few of these.”

It was true. Along with the usual lollipops and stickers I kept at the front desk (the former being exclusively for clients and never-ever for sneaking myself one, no siree), the scattering of buttons took up a good chunk of counter space, with as many varieties as I could find. I didn’t want anyone to feel left out, so I’d just kept on printing until I had over three dozen.

“Very well,” Miss Helen said finally. “If it is good for company spirit.”

I clapped my hands in delight, glad the party wasn’t going to get shut down before it even started. So palpable was my relief, I didn’t even notice that Miss Helen hadn’t given the button back.

I didn’t have time to worry about it though, since just then Dr. Ludwig came in through the glass doors. He was normally the first one after me, as he always liked to get an early start down in the lab, and we’d developed a morning routine as fellow early birds.

“Dr. Ludwig!” I said, waving my hand, partly to get his attention and partly to show off the new gloves Dell had gotten me. The rubber ones had been so hard to type in, but these were nice and concealing as well as colorful. “Happy Pride Month! Do you want a pin?”

“Guten Morgen,” he greeted warmly. “Ah, buttons?” He picked up the closest one. “Pride buttons, I see.”

“Here you go!” I said, shoving a bi pin in his general direction since he’d shown interest.

But, to my surprise, he didn’t take it immediately. “Ehrm…” he said, staring down at the circle of metal.

“…Is this not the right one?” I withdrew my hand. Was I misremembering? “I’m so sorry, I guess I forgot…”

“No, no I did say that, didn’t I.” He ran a hand through his hair, sending its usual prim style haywire. “It is just…” He coughed lightly into his fist. “…Would you allow me to confide with you for a moment?”

Immediately, I pulled out the spare footstool I kept behind the counter, patting it as Dr. Ludwig came through the counter doors and took a seat. Our early morning chats were normally something to look forward to, shared over a donut or coffee he’d brought into the office, but today he just seemed run down. As he tucked his heels onto the stool’s crossbar, he rubbed his face.

“You know I am not as…up on all of this as some of your generation, ja?” he began.

“Millennials scare you,” I nodded, pulling my legs into my swivel chair.

“I wouldn’t go so far as to say that,” he huffed. “It is…well when we had our first conversations, and it was explained to me, it seemed to fit. At the time. Having to reconcile beginning a relationship with Mikhail when I still was not quite over Frida, nor really sure why things had fallen apart with us there.”

I remembered. “At the time? But not anymore?”

He sighed, ruffling his hair even more. “Now…now I am not so sure. Being with Mikhail is…quite different than any of the thirty years Frida and I spent together. I am starting to wonder if it was more just that I held extreme affection for her, and I was inexperienced enough that I was able to mistake it for attraction.” He chuckled humorlessly. “I thought I was so in love with her, and that’s why I never even looked at another woman. Töricht.”

“I don’t think that’s dumb,” I shook my head. “Everybody’s learning new things all the time. You can’t be expected to have everything sorted right after coming out.”

“Yes, I suppose,” he said. “But I still feel…guilty I think. Several of our coworkers are proudly attracted to both men and women, and I am aware that treating such a label as a ‘phase’ is a crude stereotype they have to deal with. I’d rather not have anyone think I was making a mockery of them.”

“It’s not a stereotype if that’s what’s really happening.” I patted him on the shoulder. “No one’s going to see it like that. If you think that’s where your journey is taking you, then there’s no shame coming out a second time.”

Dr. Ludwig responded to my words with a hopeful, if not entirely convinced, look behind his spectacles.

“Here,” I said, handing him both a bi and a gay pin. “You don’t have to wear either of them, this is just for fun after all! But if you change your mind…”

He looked at the two pins in his hand, then smiled tiredly up at me. “…Thank you mein friend. You are always helpful to talk to.”

“I try to be!”

After a few more assurances, the Doctor did eventually leave for the lab. Right on his coattails, Dell and Marcel came through the front door.

“Hey there, firebug,” Dell greeted. “What are you gettin’ up to here?”

I gave the quick rundown, pulling my shirt to highlight my own pin since I’d forgotten to show it off to my first two customers. “Pick any one you like!”

“Bear in mind I am saying this as a queer person,” Marcel said, sniffing down at the massive mound of multicolored circles, “this is all quite tacky.”

“Aw, learn how to have some fun, Spook,” Dell said, elbowing him in the side. To show him up, he claimed a pansexual pin for himself, and shot me a wink.

Marcel did nothing but sniff; but, when he thought no one was looking, I saw him discreetly sneak one of the pins off the counter as he left.

After that, the morning’s influx picked up too much to greet every person individually, but during lunch people saw fit to swing by and check things out again.

“Hi buddy!” Miss Pauling greeted. “I heard you were giving out Pride pins and wanted to see if- why are there so many lesbian ones?”

“Well!” I said, ecstatic to launch into an information dump. “The oldest of these is actually the ‘lipstick lesbian’ flag which, in absence of a more generic one, was used without the kiss mark in the corner. The one with the orange stripes wasn’t created until 2018, to be more inclusive all different lesbian groups.”

“Okay, but why does this one have an axe on it?”

“That’s the labrys!” I took the purple and black pin from her hand, pointing as I described, “the double bearded axe was used by the Amazons in Greek myth, and reappropriated in 1999 for its symbolism in female empowerment.”

“Wow,” she blinked down at the five different designs. “That’s really cool, except for the fact I have no idea how to use an axe.”

“I bet Tavish could teach you, he loves his Skullcutter.”

“…I’ll think about it. I’ll just take this one for now.” She picked up the orange five-stripe variation and pinned it to her purple shirt.

“Looks good!”

“Thanks!” she grinned. “And it was really nice of you to do this.”

“Honestly, the pleasure’s all mine. I just like seeing everyone happy.”

And everyone was! At least it sure seemed that way, even if it was kind of hard to tell with Mikhail. After lunch, he lumbered past my desk, picked out a gay pin, and put it on without so much as a smile. I took the muted grunt to be that of satisfaction

Tavish was next, dropping off half a roast beef sandwich since I’d forgotten to eat today, and instantly becoming my favorite person. While I was chowing down, he swiped two trans and two bi pins from my collection.

“Wadda you need two of each for?” I asked, quite a feat with my mouth full of roast beef and my respirator hanging halfway around my chin.

“Haven’t you heard?” Tavish asked with a raise of his eyebrow. “They just dropped a new identity: double bi. It’s twice as potent as regular bisexuality.”

I tilted my head, blinking perplexedly from behind my lenses.

“Ah, just a joke duck,” he assured. “The spares are for the husband.”

“Oh, right.” I swallowed down my mouthful. “I actually haven’t seen Jane at all today?”

“Ach, he came in earlier than you. Left at five this morning.”

“What? How?” I shook my head. “I’m the one who unlocks the doors.”

“Said he was tired of waiting for your ‘lazy, unpatriotic behind’ to start the day at seven. His words, not mine.” Tavish smiled apologetically. “He broke into one of the lab side doors.”

“…I bet Mikhail had something to say about that.”

He sighed. “That he did. They’ve been at it for hours. If there’s another office-wide prank war tomorrow, you’ll know why.”

Oh no. That’s how we lost our last two coffee makers, and our last seven office hamsters. Tavish assured me that it wouldn’t get out of hand, but by the time Mick showed up near the end of the day, my mood was somewhat dampened.

“Everything alroight, Campfire?” he asked me. “Ya look glum.”

“Just thinking about the impending damage to all those nice posters I put up in the breakroom,” I said sadly. “But! If you’ve come here to pick out a pin, that might cheer me up a bit.”

Mick chuckled in that cute little way of his, and already I was smiling. “Might have.”

We were close enough that I was ninety-five percent certain which one he wanted, but I’d learned my lesson with Dr. Ludwig and didn’t try to pick it out for him. Still, I let myself entertain a self-satisfied grin as he picked up the aroace flag.

“Hey uh,” I said. “If that’s the one you like, and uh…since I know you’re into archery…”

Carefully, I opened one of my drawers and extracted the special pin I’d made earlier, Mick watching me curiously all the while.

“Someone on the internet made this design,” I explained. “It’s for an aroace, arrow-ace!”

The flag was blacked out in several places to make a bow and arrow shape, and Mick grinned as he took it from my glove. “Clever.”

“Do you like it?” I asked hesitantly.

“Well, let’s see.” He pinned it to his vest. “Looks pretty good ta me.”

I couldn’t keep my stomach from doing a little flip at that. When Dell showed up, the last to leave the office for the day, he could tell I was smiling even through the mask.

“Everything go well, partner?” he chuckled. “You look pleased as punch.”

“Everything went great! Even Scout came by, although all he did was say ‘hey, free crap!’ and dumped a bunch of pins into his pocket.”

“I’m glad to hear the attempt at company spirit was a success,” a voice from behind Dell said, making us both jump. Miss Helen emerged from the shadows, her purple jacket an entire mass of pride pins, nearly one of every kind. When had she gotten all those? Had she been paying Marcel to sneak them out while I wasn’t looking? “A happy work environment is a productive work environment, as I always say. Well done, secretary.”

“Can’t remember you ever saying that, ma’am,” Dell admitted blandly.

“…Why do you have so many?” I asked.

“These are…fun…are they not?” she sniffed. “I am having…fun.”

Huh. Maybe this is just what she looked like when she was having a good time. I shrugged. “Glad you enjoyed yourself Miss Helen! Does that mean it’s okay to do it again next year?”

“…You have my permission.”

With that, she strutted out, and Dell shot me a grin. I scooped the remaining pins into my bag and closed up the front office, chatting with him on the way to the parking lot about how we could mix things up next year.

#dnadprideweek2021 #tf2 fanfiction

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nctinfo · 4 years

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[TRANS] Chenle & Jisung’s interview with ELLE June 2020 issue!

It's the first time for Chenle and Jisung to do a magazine shoot together. Both of you seemed to have given your fans spoilers ahead of the shoot. Jisung: Really, the time went by so fast. Rather than a shoot, it felt more like I was just playing around with Chenle. Chenle: <ELLE> is a magazine known by many people. I've known it since long-ago too. So I was even more excited about the shoot. Jisung: Me too! Ah, but how old is <ELLE>? 28th anniversary this year? Wow...

We are much older than you two, aren't we? Is this year your 5th summer together? Jisung: We've known each other since 2016, so yes, that's right. Chenle: We should stop seeing each other (laughs).

Although you get along as friends [same-aged friends], Chenle is in fact born in November 2001. He is one year older than Jisung who was born in February 2002. What was the reason to become friends [to drop formalities]? Chenle: Our birthdays are only two and a half months apart, and since we get along so well, I felt like there was no need for formalities [a hyung/dongsaeng relationship]. Of course, I regret having made that decision now. I mean it. (laughs). Jisung: I jokingly said, "Can't we just be friends?" but he took it seriously. Thanks to this, we can now comfortably talk with each other like this. Chenle: It's definitely more comfortable. In Shanghai, where I grew up, we don't mind much if there's a one or two year difference. And since the NCT team has a lot of members from overseas, the atmosphere is a bit more open.

Still, it must have felt weird to see your friend Chenle become a legal adult a year earlier than you. Jisung: I've seen the older members of NCT DREAM become adults one after another so I felt relatively indifferent. It's not like people suddenly change when they turn 20 years old. But, since we all debuted as teenagers, it is kinda weird that I'm the only minor left now.

How did the YouTube content 'ChenJi's This and That', that you two do together, start? Jisung calls it 'JiChen's That and This'. Jisung: Thank you for acknowledging it (laughs). It started from the thought that it would be great to make content that uses the advantage of us two who are like real friends. We make gifts for the members, stack dominoes, and also make menus that are popular on SNS Chenle: Although we also bring up ideas here and there, the staff ideas are always more fun. Ah, it was our idea to visit my home in Shanghai.

Chenle went to a lot of rides alone at the amusement park right. Chenle: He says he is too scared to go on rides that are hard, but thinks rides that are easy are lame. Isn't it really funny? Jisung: The easy ones don't look cool (laughs).

You just finished the promotions of your 4th mini album <Reload>. You have achieved many good results such as ranking first in the domestic music chart and music shows, ranking first on iTunes in 51 countries, and selling over 500k albums. How do you feel looking back? Jisung: I always have regrets whenever we finish promotions. Even though I have worked hard and had fun, when I look back, I feel like I could do better? Chenle: I'm completely the opposite. When the album promotions finish, I think 'It was really fun this time again, I'm satisfied!' I think especially for 'Ridin'' the stage was very exciting, and it was even better because I had fun with the members.

'Beyond Live', a live-streamed concert and video call fan signings are promotions that were not imaginable last year. Jisung: I'm glad that we can do something, but it's a shame we can't meet the fans in person. Chenle: It was a new and very exciting experience. Although it was through a video, you could clearly hear the voices and see the faces of the fans like this.

You also performed solo stages on ‘Beyond Live’ Chenle: I prepared our song 'Best Friend' on the piano, but the staff made the stage really cool. On the stage the moon was floating over the sea, it was very pretty and I'm really grateful and satisfied Jisung: I danced but I don't think it was to the extent of 'Awesome~ I did a great job!'.

With you two being the youngest out of NCT’s teenage team NCT DREAM, your growth is bound to be the most impactful. You must be surprised when you watch videos of when you just debuted. Chenle: Actually, as soon as we met today, Jisung had watched an old video of mine and said 'You were so cute back then but why are you like this now?'. Jisung: It was videos of him during promotion interviews for our debut song 'Chewing Gum' and 'My First and Last', and he was so cute. It was also when Chenle hadn't been in Korea for that long yet so he was still bad at speaking. Chenle: I couldn't watch the videos at that time. Still, when I look at the other members, I think everyone was so young and cute.

I heard that Jisung played a significant role in the fast improvement of Chenle's Korean. Jisung: Yes I was Chenle: I admit he helped. Although it's a problem that my weird Korean skills are also improving (laughs).

You have done TV shows and stood on stages before debuting at 15 and 16 years old. When did you feel like this is something you're good at and wanted to do something music-related? Chenle: I love to sing, so I released my first album when I was 7 years old. However, at that time, I thought it was a hobby and an experience rather than thinking of wanting to be a singer. After coming to Korea, I knew for certain that this was the path I wanted to take. Jisung: Rather than realizing it at some point, I think the expression 'right now' is right. While watching sunbaes at SM, my desire to be like that grew and I've come here doing what I wanted to do.

For broadcasts or special stages, Jisung has danced with the hyungs of SM's 'Dance Line' such as Super Junior Eunhyuck, SHINee Taemin, and EXO Kai. Jisung: They are really good at dancing and have a lot of experience on stage so it's really helpful when they watch me dance and talk to me [about it]. It felt like I was taking years of dance lessons all at once. Chenle: For me, I learn quickly thanks to Jisung. These days, Jisung is working hard on learning how to sing so I try to help a little too. I would say things like "I think this would be better?'. Jisung: Don't you tease me when I sing though. Chenle: Me? No, not me.

What song would you like to perform if you were to do an NCT stage together? Chenle: Since there are two of us, how about NCT U's 'Baby Don't Stop'? that Taeyong and Ten hyung did together. Jisung: Uhm, that's kind of a sexy song, don't you think we should do that in a few years? For me, I would like to do NCT U's 'Without You'. I think it's a good song to sing for us together.

NCT DREAM members have often said they still lack the skills and think they can do better. Where does that ambition come from? Chenle: There are times when I feel like I'm not good enough when I watch a video clip [of myself]. Other people might not see a big difference, but I do. In that case, I really concentrate and work hard. Jisung: I think everyone has that kind of desire because we debuted at a young age. When I watch the stage of the sunbaes, I feel like that even more.

How does it feel to be the youngest in a big group called NCT? Chenle: It's so good! Originally, I'm the type to prefer when it’s crowded. It's also fun to chat and play together when we practice. Jisung: I don't have a lot of friends from school. [NCT] is like a replacement for those relationships so I feel reassured. It feels like I have a bunch of people or hyungs who are close to me. Though the dinner costs are enormous (laughs).

What's the reason that two people with different personalities can be good friends and teammates? Jisung: Oh, now that I think about it it's really interesting. We're really the opposite Chenle: I think we get along so well because we are so different. The thing we have in common the most is that we like to play around with each other? And we're the noisiest. My voice is loud and Jisung talks a lot. A while ago he was talking to himself in the car while watching the night view. It's really funny to see it from the side Jisung: If you say it like that it makes me seem kinda weird, doesn't it? (laughs) I love to fantasize. What would I say if I were to go on a program like that? I think I was playing around while thinking about those kinds of things.

Are there any aspects of your friend that you want to be more known? Jisung: There are a lot of people who think of Chenle as a bright mischievous boy with a lot of laughter, but he also has a lot of serious conversations with me. He also has a lot of ambition. Unlike the introverted me, he is cool and outgoing so I learn a lot of things through Chenle. He is much cooler than he looks. Chenle: I'm a chic person (laughs). Jisung is the type of person who worries a lot about himself, and he is also evenly worried about the members' concerns. After taking care of this and that he proudly says 'Ah, why do I look like a leader'.

There are many adults and role models around you. Since you achieved your dream of debuting early, you must be worried about growing up well. Chenle: Instead of following someone with the burden of having to grow, I want to grow up naturally while keeping what I want to protect. I can learn good things and keep regretful things to consult, but I think my own standards are important. Jisung: When I first made my debut, I wanted to be a good adult and a good influence, and I still feel the same now. Sometimes I feel sorry for someone's behavior or words, but I don’t think that anyone can be perfect. Regardless, I try to absorb the good and positive aspects only.

When do you feel like you've grown? Jisung: When I have serious conversations with Chenle and the hyungs. The spectrum of the conversations has widened. I also think I have grown when I'm able to objectively look at myself without being too biased. Chenle: When you're going through puberty, you don't know that you're going through puberty. If you think you're grown up, I think it's because you're still young. I think you've grown up when you can admit to your shortcomings and immaturity.

How will the summer be for you this time? Chenle: First of all, Jisung will have 6 ice creams all at once. Jisung: (Back then) I had them throughout the day!

Translation: Esmee @ FY! NCT (NCTINFO) | Source: ELLE Scans — Do not repost or take out without our permission!

#NCT #chenle #jisung #t:trans #t:interview #ELLE #ELLE: July 2020

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adhdeancas · 3 years

Text

Sunset Sound: Made in Heaven

Read Chapter 5 on AO3 here.

“Alright, ladies and gents, let’s do this.” Pamela rubs her hands together. They’re all crowded around a table, having hauled Pamela’s magic crap in. She looks around at them like they’re all gathered around for a campfire ghost story. “So, rumor has it that you can crack into the Empty with an inter-realm spell. So… we need somebody from each of the ball fields: Heaven, Earth, Hell, Purgatory.”

Charlie whistles. “Great. Well, we got the Heaven side covered. Earth is probably next easiest, right?”

“Except we can’t run the risk of Chuck finding out what we’re up to. So, down low. Evasive measures.”

Dean nods at Ash. “Sam’s got a handle on the Earth shit; he’s a little magic freak now. No offense.” he puts a hand on Pamela. She rolls her eyes. “But how do we get a message down to him without setting Chuck off? Not like we can send a halo-ed carrier pigeon.”

They all think on it for a second, till Pamela leans forward. “The veil. If we can contact a ghost, they can haunt Sam and get him the message.”

Charlie raises an eyebrow. “Aren’t ghosts known for being kind of… crazy? Murderous?”

“Huge dicks?” Ash adds helpfully.

Pamela shrugs. “We could find one that’s recently died; there’s the possibility they wouldn’t have turned yet. But we’d have to know who we’re contacting, we can’t just put out a classified.”

Something pings in the back of Dean’s head and he slams his hand on the table. He apologizes quickly because damn near everyone jumps at the noise. “I got it. Kevin. Kevin Tran. He’s in the veil still, and he’s spent a fuckton of time down there, he’d know how to haunt somebody good.”

“And is he going to want to help us?”

Dean frowns at Pamela. “What does that mean?”

“I mean, people don’t usually end well around you, Dean. Case in point,” she motions around the table at all of them. “It’s not your fault but… sometimes there are hard feelings.”

Dean shakes his head. He deserves hard feelings from Kevin, that’s for sure, but the kid’s awesome. Hell, last time he’d seen them he’d been almost happy, even signing up to stay in the veil forever. “Nah, we can trust Kevin. He’s family.”

“Alright. Fire her up then, Pam,” Ash is excited. Pamela shoots him a glare for impatience but she gets her shit together anyway. It’s already set up, all she has to do is ask Dean for a few personal details, chant a bit, and she gets through. “We’re asking for Kevin Tran. Kevin Tran, if you’re out there, Dean Winchester wants a word. Well, a few actually. Kevin, can you hear me?”

The draft spigot turns on by itself, spewing beer onto the floor. “Hey Kev, want a beer?” Dean jumps up and grabs a glass, pumped at the prospect of seeing his friend again.”

“That’s it, Kevin. You’re doing great. Keep trying, keep locking into that.”

The candles on the table go out one by one: apparently, Kevin practicing. Dean holds his breath and shuts off the draft spigot, a glass of beer held out in front of him. “Can ghosts drink? Wait, are you even 21, Kevin?”

“The kid’s dead and you’re gonna huff and puff over the legal age for a Pilsner?” Ash laughs. Dean hands it to him; he has a point. Maybe Jack’s made him a little overprotective of shit like that.

Kevin appears in front of Dean then, hand outstretched to try and take the beer. His sudden appearance makes Dean spill half of it all over himself. “Son of a- hi Kevin!” he offers the beer out again, and this time Kevin takes it and pours it right through his ghostly figure. “Oh… shit.”

Kevin deadpans at him. “Yeah, it sucks. Hi, Dean.”

“How you doing, bud?”

Kevin shrugs and sighs, looking down at himself. “Well, I’m dead. Still. Dean, you wanna explain what I’m doing here first?”

Dean nods, grabbing the beer back from Kevin and setting it on the table. He motions for the kid to turn around toward the table set up with witchy shit. “Kevin, this is Ash, Charlie, and Pamela, the psychic who summoned you.” Pamela and Ash both give a flirty wink, which makes Dean turn about three shades of red in the face.

“Heard a lot, kid.” Ash greets him.

“Yeah, I’ve never heard of any dead guy with such bad luck.” Pamela adds on. And she would know.

Kevin nods with a wry smile. “Yeah, well, that’s just me, I guess. Dead for years, in the veil most of it and hell for the rest.”

“Kev, I’m so sorry-”

Kevin holds up a hand to stave off Dean’s apologies. “It’s not your fault, Dean. It’s Chuck’s. Tell me you got him.”

“That’s what we’re here for, man.”

“Yeah, apparently we’re the Kill God Team now.” Charlie grins and Kevin smiles back.

“Hell fucking yeah. I can get on board with that. Whaddya need me to do?”

They all sit down at the table and map it all out. “We need you to get the plan over to Sam, but we can’t have Chuck finding out about any of it.”

“Yeah, so you need to make sure he knows to keep a low profile.” Dean warns. The last fucking thing in the world they need is to lose the element of surprise. Plus, that would put Sam right in Chuck’s crosshairs, and Dean can’t be there to back him up. He curses himself again for dying.

“What exactly do we mean by low profile?” Charlie asks. “Are we talking cabin in the middle of the woods off-grid kind of low profile or just a Meet the Robinson’s type deal?”

Dean sighs. “Sam needs to stay away from anything Chuck likes to watch.” God, it sounded grimy just saying it. “That means hunting, that means me, that means… Eileen too.”

“Eileen?”

“His girlfriend.” It hurts Dean to think about, but- “Chuck’s used them against each other before; he likes them together. So they gotta stay apart.”

“Shit.” Charlie exhales quietly, and Dean nods. It’s unfair. It sucks. It’s Chuck.

“Tell him to live a normal life. Be as happy as he can. But don’t come looking for me and don’t get interesting. Or Chuck will just fuck with him some more, and if he does that… he’s gonna find out what we’re doing.” Kevin nods seriously. He never gets brought around for fun shit, does he? Dean feels a pang of regret at that. He immediately wants to change it. “But right now, whaddya say we have some fun, huh?”

The table looks at him like he’s gone nutty. He shrugs and grins. “Come on guys, we’re dead. Don’t we all have a night to spare?”

He sees Charlie come around first, slow grin spreading across her face. “Fuck yeah, let’s party, bitches!”

It doesn’t take the rest of them much convincing either. Dean has some good-ass friends. “Yo Kev, since you can’t get fucked up, you wanna play some pool?” Ash hitches his thumb at the table behind him.

Dean laughs. “Ash, you are one cruel son of a bitch. Years of being a friggin’ ghost and you’re gonna whoop him in pool? That’s cold.”

Ash shakes his head. “Nah man, I’ve spent way more time passed out on that table than playing on it. I’d say the kid’s got a fair shot.” Kevin smiles and shrugs at Dean.

“Hey, that’s more than I’ve ever gotten before; I’ll take my chances”

They head off to play and Dean grabs a beer to watch, a good one this time. One with the label he and Sam used to buy, the kind that Cas said “didn’t taste as much like the vast expanse of space dust” as the others. Charlie and Pamela follow with their own.

“So Dean,” Pamela says. “Ash tells me you gotta angel on your shoulder.” She sounds a little weary. Dean figures that’s fair, given her experience with the species.

“Uh… yeah. Castiel.” He gestures to her eyes. “That one.” Pamela shrugs if off.

“So make me like him. Charlie here says you’ve got quite the bond.” Dean blushes pink, but for once there isn’t any innuendo behind her voice. At least, none that is teasing. He looks to Charlie, who makes a ‘I didn’t say anything’ face at him and relaxes a bit.

“Well, uh, he hasn’t burned anymore eyes out,” Dean starts, then reconsiders. “Well, none that didn’t deserve it.” Not really true either. “Well-”

“He’s super cute.” Charlie cuts him off. Dean blushes deeper. “He gave a whole fuck-you to heaven to save Dean.” Dean blushes deeper still. Why does it sound so… intimate when she says it like that? Pamela just raises an eyebrow.

“Sounds like some ally.”

“Cas?” Kevin sinks a ball. The kid’s not bad, actually. Ash was right; they are neck-and-neck. “Yeah, he’s awesome. I mean, weird, but cool.” Dean grins. Weird but cool was exactly Cas.

“Someday, man, I gotta meet this guy.” Ash laments.

“Someday, dude, you will.” Dean vows. Somehow sitting around talking about him with all these guys, he felt confident it was true. “Once we bust him out, you better bet we’re throwing a party and meet-and-greeting everybody.

“I’ll finally get to tease him for the eyes. You think it’d get him better without the fakes?” She pops her fake cloudy eyes out and waggles her eyebrows at Dean, empty eye sockets looking bizarre on such a cheerful face. Dean laughs.

“You’re not gonna need to; he already feels shitty for that. He’ll probably offer to heal ‘em, matter of fact.”

“Well, he won’t get far with that one,” Ash calls over. “Angels been trying to do it for years.” Pamela nods at Dean’s questioning glance.

“Wouldn’t be me without ‘em, now. Who needs sight anyway?”

“Without eyes you won’t be able to see my pretty face!” Dean bullshits.

“Yeah, or your brother’s tight ass. Second thought, remind me when Sam gets up here, won’t ya?” Dean makes a gagging noise and Pamela laughs.

“So you said Chuck’s in your… kid?” Kevin asks skeptically. He misses a shot and Ash hollers. Dean cracks his neck and considers how to answer.

“Kinda. I mean, yeah. Just not- he’s Lucifer and a human’s, technically.” He starts, realizing Kelly’s in heaven too. They’ve gotta let her in on this, but not now. Not now when Chuck!Jack is probably visiting her as her son; it’s too risky. With how sick he feels at the idea of Jack being Chuck’s meatsuit, well…

He sees Cas. Again. Just for a second, there he is standing outside the window, looking less wounded but more tired than before. He looks like he’s focused on something, like he’s scared, but he also looks transfixed, like he can’t look away. As Dean watches, Cas closes his eyes and mouths something. It looks like he’s counting. “One, two, three.” Dean blinks and he’s gone, and Dean’s left wondering if he imagined the whole thing.

“Dean?”

“Yeah.” He smiles at Charlie to let her know he’s okay. Ish. “Sorry, uh, so he’s kind of devilspawn but he’s ours. Mine, Cas’s, Sam’s. Long story. But he’s a good kid.” He nods, knowing he oughta give more information, but not really knowing how.

“Who woulda thought, Dean Winchester, a dad.” Ash ribs with a grin. Dean laughs back and nods. His life hadn’t really screamed stability and mentorhood. His death still didn’t.

“Yeah, I… I haven’t exactly been a star father-figure…” Dean shakes his head. The conflict in his head that culminates in Jack is confusing as hell, but three things win him over. The first is Jack’s innocent, naive face looking up at him for any kind of approval or wisdom. A kid. Just a kid. The second is Cas’s face as he smiles at him that one night over a whiskey glass, the prideful joy as he tells Dean he always believed in Jack. The third is the pit in his gut of all the times he acted like his dad to Jack. And no matter what, Dean can’t leave those memories be. He can’t have Jack remember him like that, and he can’t look Cas in the eye knowing he didn’t do everything he could to make things right. “But that’s gonna change, if it fucking kills me. We gotta save him when we get Chuck, guys, we gotta.”

“We will.” Kevin looks at him with an overly-confident smile. “We can’t lose. You’ve got me, now!”

The rest of them bust out laughing, and Kevin fakes offense. “You’re right, Kev. Don’t know what I’m so worried ‘bout.”

Tag List (ask to be added or removed):

@dochunterwitch @justonecitizenoftheearth @gnbrules @purpe @castiel-is-a-cat @alienapparatus @damian-janus-pendragon

#sunset sound #chapter 6 #made in heaven #deancas #destiel #fanfic #my writing #dean winchester #charlie bradbury #pamela barnes #ash #kevin tran #castiel #jack kline #chuck shurley

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louisminyard · 3 years

Note

heyy <3 from your blog I always get the feeling that I'd like the things that you read so I wanted to ask if you had any book recs? 👀 also if you know any maybe something not too long sjfh I'm still trying to go back into the habit of reading more books, but I really liked on earth we're briefly gorgeous when you recommended it!

hope you are having a great day 💞💞

HI HI okay so I don’t want to make this list TOO long so I separated it into three categories: books similar to on earth we’re briefly gorgeous, fun books that are fast reads (great for reading slumps) and my faves from the tumblr classics list!

books similar to on earth we’re briefly gorgeous

SO I’ve never actually found a book as similar as Vuong and his writing (and I’ve been searching!) but this is more of a list of books with a great narrative that makes you feel split into two!!!

Everything I Never Told You: One of my favorite books ever! So begins this exquisite novel about a Chinese American family living in 1970s small-town Ohio. Lydia is the favorite child of Marilyn and James Lee, and her parents are determined that she will fulfill the dreams they were unable to pursue. But when Lydia’s body is found in the local lake, the delicate balancing act that has been keeping the Lee family together is destroyed, tumbling them into chaos.

The Nickel Boys: When Elwood Curtis, a black boy growing up in 1960s Tallahassee, is unfairly sentenced to a juvenile reformatory called the Nickel Academy, he finds himself trapped in a grotesque chamber of horrors. Elwood’s only salvation is his friendship with fellow “delinquent” Turner, which deepens despite Turner’s conviction that Elwood is hopelessly naive, that the world is crooked, and that the only way to survive is to scheme and avoid trouble.

I’ll Give You the Sun - so different then everything else on this list but: The novel follows a set of twins, Jude and Noah. Although they were incredibly close at thirteen, three years later they are hardly speaking to each other. The early years are narrated by Noah as he struggles with an enormous secret that affects his past, present, and future. The later years are narrated by Jude as her life changes when she meets an arrogant and broken, yet beautiful boy.

Tell the Wolves I’m Home: It follows the life of June Elbus, a 14-year-old girl, whose gay uncle had died of AIDS in the 1980s, and the subsequent friendship she develops with his boyfriend.

Fun Books

So these are books that are just more fun and shorter! I love a good fast read tbh

None Shall Sleep - this one is a murder mystery so I wouldn’t recommend if you don’t like horror tbh but it’s really fast-paced and I REALLY loved this book: A psychological thriller about two teenagers teaming up with the FBI to track down juvenile serial killers.

Cemetery Boys: A trans boy determined to prove his gender to his traditional Latinx family summons a ghost who refuses to leave.

Boyfriend Material: Luc O'Donnell is tangentially--and reluctantly--famous. His rock star parents split when he was young, and the father he's never met spent the next twenty years cruising in and out of rehab. Now that his dad's making a comeback, Luc's back in the public eye, and one compromising photo is enough to ruin everything. To clean up his image, Luc has to find a nice, normal relationship...and Oliver Blackwood is as nice and normal as they come. He's a barrister, an ethical vegetarian, and he's never inspired a moment of scandal in his life. In other words: perfect boyfriend material. Unfortunately apart from being gay, single, and really, really in need of a date for a big event, Luc and Oliver have nothing in common. So they strike a deal to be publicity-friendly (fake) boyfriends until the dust has settled. Then they can go their separate ways and pretend it never happened.

Late to the Party: Seventeen is nothing like Codi Teller imagined. She’s never crashed a party, never stayed out too late. She’s never even been kissed. And it’s not just because she’s gay. It’s because she and her two best friends, Maritza and JaKory, spend more time in her basement watching Netflix than engaging with the outside world. So when Maritza and JaKory suggest crashing a party, Codi is highly skeptical. Those parties aren’t for kids like them. They’re for cool kids. Straight kids. But then Codi stumbles upon one of those cool kids, Ricky, kissing another boy in the dark, and an unexpected friendship is formed. In return for never talking about that kiss, Ricky takes Codi under his wing and draws her into a wild summer filled with late nights, new experiences, and one really cute girl named Lydia. The only problem? Codi never tells Maritza or JaKory about any of it.

Tumblr’s Faves

The Raven Cycle series: The Raven Cycle follows four private schoolboys, a psychic's daughter, and a Welsh legend sleeping under mountains in a sleepy Virginia town. (a fave!)

The Song of Achilles: Retelling of the Achilles mythology and first half of the Trojan War!

Six of Crows duology: Ketterdam: a bustling hub of international trade where anything can be had for the right price—and no one knows that better than criminal prodigy Kaz Brekker. Kaz is offered a chance at a deadly heist that could make him rich beyond his wildest dreams. But he can’t pull it off alone. . . . Kaz’s crew is the only thing that might stand between the world and destruction—if they don’t kill each other first. (VERY SLOW WORLD BUILDING BUT ITS GREAT you just have to suffer the first half of the first book!!)

*Shades of Magic: Kell is one of the last Antari--magicians with a rare, coveted ability to travel between parallel Londons: Red, Grey, White, and, once upon a time, Black. Officially, he's an ambassador; unofficially, he's a smuggler. After an exchange goes awry, Kell escapes to Grey London and runs into Delilah Bard, a cut-purse with lofty aspirations. Now perilous magic is afoot, and treachery lurks at every turn. To save all of the worlds, they'll first need to stay alive.

*Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe: fave!! Aristotle is an angry teen with a brother in prison. Dante is a know-it-all who has an unusual way of looking at the world. When the two meet at the swimming pool, they seem to have nothing in common. But as the loners start spending time together, they discover that they share a special friendship--the kind that changes lives and lasts a lifetime. And it is through this friendship that Ari and Dante will learn the most important truths about themselves and the kind of people they want to be.

These are like my fave fave list so!! hopefully you haven’t read too many on this list djlsdkjfdsl if you have,, I'm sorry i’ll make you a new list!! but happy reading and lmk if you read any of them!!

#ENJOY!!!#hopefully my reading range grows after this year i have so many in my tbr list its BAD FKJDSSLKDJ but these are my go to recs!#books #asks #essercipertuttienonperse

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gothwarlocks · 3 years

Note

17. How were you introduced to the fandom? 25. What type of ship would you fly? and 30. Do you have any headcanons (was thinking of how you've talked about the underground scene in SW but this can be about anything)?

thank you Raven!! 🖤🥰

Placing under a cut bc I ended up rambling a lot! It’s a long post.

17. How were you introduced to the fandom?

I didn’t actively participate in any true Star Wars fandom for a while, actually. When SWTOR launched in 2011 I was about 16 and hadn’t had great interactions with SW fans since the majority I bumped into were gatekeepy cishet men, and being a closeted gay trans kid... lol, you get it. I mostly just chatted with irl friends about stuff I was excited about. And also, the fandom wasn’t really established too well on here yet, so there’s that. I would peek around tumblr occasionally but short of a couple people chatting about it or posting fanart there wasn’t a sense of community yet (at least, from what I saw).

In 2010 though, idk If anyone will know about this at all but if you ever heard of Clone Wars Adventures I was very very present there haha. I interacted with mostly other teens or the occasional chill adult that was there for some reason (this was a very...kid-oriented online game). I was hounded a lot by other players bc I would always be top 5 on the leaderboards for a couple of the silly little minigames :) it was really fun, actually! I would log on and since you can see peoples’ online/offline status, I would get messages within minutes from players wanting to challenge me to a 1v1 of some sort lol. There was also instanced housing, and there was more free reign on building stuff, so people got really creative. I myself built a functioning cantina/music venue on the roof of my Coruscant apartment (which should not have been reach-able lol) that was sometimes used for group chilling.

If anyone ever is interested, look up some videos. The things players would build and boundary-break to do is very cool lol. Once SWTOR launched though, players that had formed friend groups or guilds just migrated there. It was interesting to see!

25. What type of ship would you fly?

HMMM there are so many ships around in the EU lol. Almost too hard to narrow it down... When I was a kid I was obsessed with A-wings, X-wings, and Naboo starfighters. From SWTOR, I think my favorite ship is either the Phantom, for it’s sleek and elegent design, or the smuggler’s freighter, for it’s cozy and communal atmosphere.

30. Do you have any headcanons?

Oh yeah!! Like you mentioned I do love thinking about subcultures in the galaxy and expanding on that, but here’s a few for SWTOR and EU(?) that I enjoy:

(Sorry in advance for how many run-on sentences there are and if anything just sounds harebrained lol. CW for talk of transition, I suppose!)

Dathomirian Zabraks in the Old Republic Era... I just accept that their witchy culture(s) have existed for millennia, but were just very isolationist and did their best to remain undetected from the rest of the galaxy--different groups could have had other policies though. The group portrayed in CW could be maybe the last group to survive, or something like that (since in Jedi Order it’s presented like that, right?). Anywho, as a matriarchal culture that unfortunately enslaves Zabrak men, I think they would have a unique take on gender. I think trans women/trans feminine people would be wholly embraced and exalted as having “ascended” out of the male lower caste for discovering who they really are, and trans men/trans masculine people would be, well, not so cherished(?) having--and I say this as a trans man--“lowered” or “belittled” themselves. The witches can change/enhance body shape through magic, as seen with Maul and Savage. So I imagine they would help trans people that want to physically transition to help fit them into the social roles they were always meant to have, and beyond that there isn’t much to blink at. I headcanon Lorn still has the skin pigmentation of a Datho witch (and he retains some of their powers), but his tattoos are given to him by fellow Zabrak men and his horns and other body characteristics are given to him through witch rituals. And as for non-binary Dathomirian people, I would hope they just have the choice to belong to either the witch clans or Zabrak tribes. I’d love to hear a non-binary person’s take on this, to be honest 👀

Rattataki should have little to no sexual dimorphism, and they could stand to look more...alien. (Plus, they desperately need lore-building.) I just think of all the species they could have done this for out of the game, this one could have been it.

I also just absorb and adopt a lot of HC’s I see going around for all sorts of stuff, here’s a few of my fav that aren’t my own:

Twi’leks having headgear designed for trans or gnc twi’leks to help them express themselves. Also lekku accessories in general are very cute and fun to think about.

Cathar behaving a little bit feline... In cute ways :)

Togruta with sharp teeth and montrals that can grow into all sorts of forms!

Sith Purebloods having black sclera and pointed ears is a pipe dream of mine but it’s cool if they don’t given their integration with Humans.

#long post #ty again!!! I got to word-vomit for a bit lol

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sagesilentfire · 4 years

Photo

I'm looking for a trans sensitivity reader (for Marcie) and possibly a poc sensitivity reader (for the monsters vs mewmans plot), so if you're available, please tell me, and we'll figure something out.

Forgive my inability to draw humans, please.

I know this is a big departure from my usual content, so I'd like to make sure you know that watching SVTFOE is not necessary to enjoy this AU, as everything needed to understand the plot is explained in-story. In fact, I'd love to have someone who's never even heard of a svftoe to read it so I can make sure it makes its own logical sense.

Anyways...

(putting this under a read more for your scrolling purposes)

Hi. I'm Sage, and I would like to talk about a show I really liked. The past tense being the operative, as it used to be good, but...

I started watching SVTFOE after watching the great Steven Universe, which meant I had high expectations for it. And it met those expectations! From the beginning I was hooked. It was a good show. But as the seasons went on, it started to... rot.

Now, something to know about me is that I do not invest myself wisely. I love the things I love deeply and with passion. I get attached easily, and I love to theorize about the things I love. So I was heartbroken when SVTFOE ended the way it did, with none of my questions answered.

And when my theories were better than canon, well, that meant I had a new project: a complete rewrite of Star vs. the Forces of Evil. This AU will start similar to canon, but gradually diverge from it until it's something completely new. It will also have five separate "seasons".

So here's my AU: Star and Marcie and The Forces Of Evil (aka samatfoe). This AU will tear apart the scraps of lore that we got from SVTFOE and expand on it and make new lore, all narrated by my lovely OC, Sílthéy. And I promise I will get to as much as possible. If you're worried, check the titles of all of the chapters, which will hopefully reassure you that, yes, I will get to everything (or at least everything I've thought of ;)).

Dramatis Personae:

Star: Star will mostly stay the same in the first few seasons, but I'll try to have her actually grow and mature while staying a good person in the later seasons. She'll also be a bit more fire-aligned, because I wanted to be able to tell my Star and the canon Star apart easily. (She also doesn't get those wings until Mewberty.)

Marcie: is a trans girl. The entire second "episode" will be about her being trans. And I will, again, try to not have her act like a jerk in later seasons. She also won't be an adult trapped in a teenager's body, as that was waaay too weird for me. Instead she won't age in the Neverzone, period, and there will be an episode dedicated to her re-adjusting to Earth and discussing what the whole "spent a decade and a half in eight minutes" thing means for her. And, of course, she'll be more involved with the Mewni plot, as she will be interested in learning the lore behind Mewni from the beginning and push Star to find out more about Mewni.

Ludo: Ludo's story will not effectively end with the Battle for Mewni. He will get a redemption arc, with all the pitfalls and trip-ups that come with that. And all of his flaws and issues will be brought up, now just forgiving him for everything he did because he had bad parents. And Dennis will continue to be a cinnamon roll. Some things never change.

Buff Frog/Yvgeny: will not change. He is good lad.

Toffee: This is the big one. Where to start, and how to start it without spoiling everything I have planned? Well, let me tell you this: Toffee is getting a complete overhaul. For one thing, I now made them agender for various complicated reasons that will be revealed in-story, eventually. And for another thing, they will get an actual backstory and personality! Isn't that a novel idea! And they will not die abruptly and nonsensically in Battle for Mewni, so don't worry about that.

Jackie: Oh, Jackie. You poor dear. Jackie will not be delegated to the role of "one-time love interest who just skateboards out of the plot". First of all, Marcie will only have a squish (a platonic crush) on her, because I don't trust my aro/ace self with the weird things people in romantic love do to get together, but I do know what it's like to desperately want to be friends with someone. Secondly, while she will be out of the spotlight in later seasons, it'll be because she's on an exchange trip to France, not because we're abandoning her character and her world for no good reason.

Janna: never changes. Pretty sure she's the one constant of the multiverse.

Tom: will have his redemption arc earlier in the story so I can use him for things, but other than that will not change much.

Moon: First of all, she will not betray everything her daughter stands for by siding with Mina this time. There are plenty of other ways Mina could rise to power, so there's no need to ruin her character by making her do a stupid, illogical thing that even a five-year-old would see was stupid. I mean, she's still going to be kind of racist, but she's well-established to be level-headed and even a little clever, so she will not do something that would so obviously blow up in her face. Secondly, she will be a bad ruler, hence why Mewni is a total mess, but she will learn and become better and help Star's efforts to improve Mewni.

Glossaryck: is... changing. He won't "lose" his sanity for season three, but he will also not be in a totally heroic role. It's a complicated thing and a bit of a spoiler, so I'll leave it at that. Also, he's a dragon now Because Reasons (no, seriously, I have a reason for it. It's also a spoiler).

River: River will be goofy, like usual, but he won't be plot-destroyingly stupid. I'll try my best to not make you question why he's even king while still making him a foil to Moon. It's the tightrope I must walk.

Angie and Raphael: Will not completely disappear from the plot in later seasons, but will instead be like a second family to Star and will be a refuge when her overbearing Butterfly side gets too much.

Kelly: Will not be involved in a stupid romantic subplot with Marcie. Sorry. Other than that, Kelly will remain pretty much the same, aside from now being tiny, because that's just how she came out in my art. She's pretty cool.

Miss Heinous: Will not be Meteora this time around. I disliked how Heinous hurt so many people and was a horrible person, but as soon as her Tragic Backstory™ was revealed, all that pain and suffering she caused was ignored in favor of making her Super Duper Tragic™. So I'm separating the characters. Don't worry, though, she'll get the backstory and character arc she deserves.

Saint Olga: Saint Olga will be the main motivator for Miss Heinous's actions, as she is desperate to please the robot. Other than that, Saint Olga won't actually get much character. She's a bad guy, pure and simple.

Meteora: will not turn into a baby. She will deal with the consequences of her actions like a mature, responsible sixteen-year-old. But because she's sixteen, things won't be too harsh when she does snap. She'll still have her mother and father to help her and guide her.

Eclipsa: Regarding Eclipsa's design, I tried to make her fat, but... I don't know if it translates well in my art. I'm just not that good at art yet. But aside from that, making her cheekmarks dark gray (spades are a black card, not a red card! That bugged me so unreasonably much), and giving her as much of a connection to Toffee as the show implied, I'm not changing much about her. She was one of the good characters.

Globgor: Will have fought against mewmans in the past, but not have eaten them (what were the writers thinking?! Making your metaphorical poc eat people is... not good). And it will be more of a case of Star and Eclipsa knowing he is good and should be released from the crystal, but the general mewman populace not accepting it, until Cornonation, where he proves he's a good guy.

Shinjai: Is a new character I am thrilled to introduce to you all! She came from me thinking that for someone who supposedly wants to end mewman-monster racism, Star sure doesn't have any monster friends (Buff Frog doesn't count. He's an adult, and they don't really hang out so much). So here's Shinjai! She's a septarian, and is introduced instead of Princess Smooshy in Sleep Spells. She's a very minor minor monster noble, and her family has about as much political power as your average worm on a sidewalk after it rains, but all noble monsters must go to Saint Olga's Reform School for Wayward Royalty, so she runs away and gets help from Star and Marcie. She's mostly made to replace Pony Head: she's spunky and... uh, actually she's nothing like Pony Head. She's also unafraid of asking difficult questions and knows more about the plot than she lets on.

Rasticore: is very different from his canon counterpart: he only allies with Heinous and Saint Olga to keep an eye on them for ~someone~, and thoroughly dislikes them, despite agreeing to their mission. He also can regenerate as quickly as Toffee, he just chooses not to for ~reasons~. He also has a mysterious partner, but we all know it's – *gets clubbed over the head by Síthéy*

Mina: Making fun of mental illnesses isn't funny kids. Therefore, Mina is the only neurotypical member of the cast. She does boring neurotypical things like... I dunno, cleaning? And she's still a threat: bigotry and hatred are not exclusive to people with mental illnesses, after all.

Lilacia: Now, Lilacia Pegasus, the horse formerly known as Pony Head, will... exist. She won't be as overwhelmingly annoying, hopefully, as she is in canon. And to make sure she feels consequences for her actions, there will be a subplot in season two about her and Star growing apart as Star grows and leaves Lilacia's annoying party girl antics behind. Lilacia will have to realize that her immature actions are making Star leave her behind, and she'll have to grow as a person because of it.

Then there's a mysterious character who is very mysterious and does mysterious things and has a mysterious personality and is generally mysterious... mysterious. She'll be introduced in the second season and will be as mysterious as promised, I swear.

And finally, of course, it will be narrated by Sílthéy. She will tell this story, and her part in it, for all to hear. Or read? It's a bit of a strange medium, storytelling on paper. Or on a screen, whatever.

Now, of course, by now you must be wondering: What about the shipping? The shipping's the most important part, right? Well, here is my answer: There will be no ship wars. There will be no love dodecahedrons. There will be no cheating, no lies, no throwing other characters under the bus for stupid romantic drama. Why? BECAUSE STAR AND MARCIE ARE BOTH ARO/ACE. Suck on that, Starco! I am the last person to trust romantic drama with, so all of the romantic relationships in this bandwagon will be established, healthy relationships that have decades of chosen love and appreciation for one another behind them. And past!Tomstar and brief, schoolchild-crush-esque Star/Oskar but that doesn't count.

So, I believe that about wraps things up for this post. I'll start posting chapters soon, and will post two chapters every other week, and I'll release the descriptions of them two weeks before I post them. If you have any questions, please ask them! I want to work on my drawing skills, so I might even draw something for them!

Description for next episodes:

Star's Birthday: Star is a young, wild princess who is about to receive her family's most precious heirlooms.

Trouble in Diazland: Star is put under the care of the Diaz family, but can't quite seem to connect with their son, Marco.

And, finally, I have thank yous! These are mostly people I watched but haven't really interacted with yet, so if you get tagged know that you don't know me, I just followed you for svtfoe content. And for, you know, your personality.

Thanks to ankle-beez for being hilarious and reminding me why I made this AU when you relentlessly drag svtfoe. Thank you to @full-moon-phoenix, @dappercritter, and the lizard squad for my regular dose of Toffee. Thank you morningmark and @jess-the-vampire for keeping me invested in svtfoe as a whole. Thanks to svtfoe-critical and @twinklecupcake for good ideas. Thank you to TBlofeld on AO3 for your amazing AU, Monsters, Mewmans, Magic, that, while we took things and ran in completely opposite directions, still inspired me to complete mine. And thank you to Blue Order, whose deeply hilarious and deeply accurate video "How Star Vs the Forces of Evil Fell From Grace" inspired me to create this story in the first place. And, of course, thank you to whoever on the svtfoe wiki writes down the transcripts to every episode. You've helped me so much. I admit that I didn't follow all of your guys' advice, but you did help me get here, every one of you. So thank you.

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