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#sometimes tumblr mixes up my tags and if it happened this time then this is gonna be unintelligible
toaster-selfships · 2 months
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i of course HAVE to ask for number 6 on the ask game with mcqueen and anyone else you think would be fun to answer for. i would also love to ask 1 and 5!
~zale (@zaletham)
Thank you so very much Zale!!! Didn't realize how lengthy I was gonna talk about this here in the post and in the tags, but it was very nice to get out my system!! 😊
I'm actually so excited that you asked number 6 for M.cQueen, it hadn't even crossed my mind at first, and technically isn't zoo or aquarium, moreso museum, but I think that still qualifies- but! L.ightning actually loovesss dinosaurs! I don't know if you've ever heard of C.ars On The Road, it's like this little series that came out in 2023, each episode is about 5 minutes long(they say like 7 minutes but it's just 2+ minutes of credits, no extra credit scenes except for a 5 second one in one episode) and L.ightning and M.ater, to make a long story short, go on a roadtrip together and they go on stops along the way and the first stop they go to is like a dinosaur museum!
And L.ightning like full swing goes into hyperfixation mode and just babbles about dinosaurs and I love it. He says he did "hours of intensive research" and it just cuts to him watching documentaries in M.ack's trailer and it makes me giggle. M.ack is so sweet, I can only imagine how much second-hand dino knowledge he has cause of L.ightning or overhearing his documentaries! There's also been some jokes that what if the main reason L.ightning wanted to be D.inoco's team in the first movie is just cause he likes dinosaurs and I love it.
I explain a bit more in the tags but tumblr has a one video limit per post that I didn't know about?? So I'm just doing one of the clips here!
They're so silly I love it.
But basically to make a long story short! L.ightning has a massive hyperfixation on dinosaur stuff and would thrive in a dinosaur related musuem. Though, I'd imagine he'd be bored in an aquarium or zoo until he realized that he could make connections here, and he'd go around to all the bird-type species or sharks and talk about how they're related to dinosaurs or have dinosaur ancestors and such!
1) what does their alarm ringtone sound like
It took me some pondering at first who to answer this for and then an idea immediately hit me, and I'd figure I'd answer this for F.rancesco
Basically, to put it in a nutshell, F.1 is a bunch of international racers on international race courses, and whoever wins at the end of each race gets their national anthem played! And I'm giggling over the thought of F.rancesco setting his alarm that he wakes up to in the morning to ltaly's national anthem.
Ringtone wise though, he'd definitely set it to a specific song, or something someone would ask questions about so he could go on this entire spiel about how it relates to him or something he likes. I'd probably rub off on him at some point and he'd make his ringtone(or the ringtone specifically for when I call) S.mooth Operator by Sade.
5) how do they bookmark their book pages
I'll answer this one for F.inn, just cause I think he's the one that's mostly likely to read full books fairly frequently. He'd probably just have a simple bookmark. something small and fairly thin cause he likes taking care of his books and wouldn't want to bend any pages or mess up the spine of the book too badly, probably something like this:
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Maybe not the particular design that's on it, but definitely just the rectangle with the little tassels on it. I wouldn't be surprised if he had a bookmark with the UK flag on it as a design, he's quite patriotic and I think it's adorable. Though due to my recent knitting escapades he'd 100% ask me to knit one like one of these:
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Though this has also given me the brilliant enlightenment idea of F.inn having one of those book lights or book lamps that clamp onto the book and shines a light on it and you can kinda adjust it and l'1l be having brainrot over that for a bit. May or may not have cultivated a fic idea around it already.
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nellasbookplanet · 10 months
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Book recs: sapphic romance for people who like Hannibal and Interwiev with the Vampire, aka fucked up and toxic
Enemies to lovers, lovers to enemies, fucked up power imbalances, manipulations, plain bad people doing bad things - if you like your sapphics a little bit dark check out these books!
Some of these end happily, some tragically, some are more will-they-won’t-they than full on romance, some focus on healing while others focus on Getting Worse, but they’re all very juicy.
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For details on the books, continue under the readmore
Feel free to recommend more books in tags and comments!
Othe book rec posts:
Really cool fantasy worldbuilding
Really cool sci-fi worldbuilding
Mermaid books
Vampire books
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The Abyss Surrounds Us by Emily Skrutskie
Young Adult. tumblr classic back in the day! A trainer of sea monsters genetically engineered to protect ships from pirates is kidnapped by, you guessed it, pirates, one of whom happens to be very hot.
Escaping Exodus by Nicky Drayden
While my feelings on Escaping Exodus were mixed, it cannot be denied that the dynamic between the two leads and the way they go from childhood best friends to enemies on different sides of a class and power struggle is very delicious. It also features some really cool worldbuilding of living, alien generation spaceships and the human culture that has developed inside them.
The Stars are Legion by Kameron Hurley
This book fucked me up when I read it. It’s weird, it's gross, there’s So Much Viscera, there are literally no men, it has living spaceships and biotech but in the most horrific way imaginable. Had I to categorize it I would call it grimdark military sf. It’s an experience but not necessarily a pleasant one.
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The Lumionus Dead by Caitlin Starling
Possibly one of the most unsettling books I've ever read, and definitely the most claustrophobic. Gyre, a caver on an alien planet, ventures into the dark and dangerous underground, guided only by a woman who has no compunctions on using and manipulating Gyre as she sees fit to obtain her secretive goals down in the caves.
The Jasmine Throne by Tasha Suri
On the less toxic and fucked up side of the spectrum, but still pretty juicy. A princess held captive by her own brother, who wants to see her dead, tries to trick a servant into helping her escape, but with undeniable attraction growing between them and the servant having her own goals things quickly get complicated.
Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir
Listen, if you're on tumblr I probably don't need to explain this book to you. Trust me when I say it's exactly as good as people claim. There are indeed lesbian necromancers in space (quite a few of them, actually), but also incredible worldbuilding that keeps growing with every new installment, interesting political commentary, morally complex characters with fucked up dynamics, and well-thought out plot that keeps you guessing until the last.
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They Never Learn by Layne Fargo
Listen, sometimes you just want to read about a vicious bisexual lady professor who murders predatory men and falls for the woman trying to solve her crimes and that's okay.
Fingersmith by Sarah Waters
The source of not one but two movie adaptations, Fingersmith is a story of trickery and manipulation as a young conwoman works to gain the trust of a heiress. I don’t want to say much more because the twists are some of the best parts, but trust that it doesn’t take long for things to get real complicated between them.
The Unbroken by C.L. Clark
Tourraine, who was stolen as a child and trained as a soldier for the empire that conquered her home, is recruited by Luka, the future leader of the conquering country to route out a rebellion. A game of twisted loyalties and attraction is soon to develop.
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This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone
Again, if you're on tumblr (or twitter, apparently) you have in all likelihood already heard of this one, too. Just like GtN it lives up to all expectations. It features two women on different sides of the titular time war, who starts leaving letters for the other to find as they chase each other through time. A quick read, slightly surreal, and absolutely beautiful, I cannot recommend this enough. Pretty mild on the fucked-up-scale.
House of Hunger by Alexis Henderson
In a world where the rich drink blood to preserve their health, Marion applies to a position as bloodmaid in a notorious noble house far from home. Suddenly showered with luxuries and debauchery, Marion soon gains the interest and favor of Lisavet, countess of the house. A fresh take on the idea of vampires.
Sorrowland by Rivers Solomon
A young pregnant woman flees a cult that left her body strange and changing in terrifying ways. Hidden from the world, she does her best to raise her children while trying to find out the truth of the cult and being pursued by a hunter in a dangerous game of cat and mouse. In no way a romance, but certainly has some fucked up sapphic shit going on.
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The Traitor Baru Cormorant by Seth Dickinson
After her home was conquered by another land, Baru is determined to join their forces and climb the ladder until she’s in a position to free her people. To prove her loyalty, she’s sent to bring order and quell rebellion in another conqured region. Baru is set to succeed, but also has to struggle with her feelings for Tain Hu, a duchess of this region.
Ice Massacre (Mermaids of Eriana Kwai trilogy) by Tiana Warner
Young Adult. A small island is forced to defend itself against intruding forces of vicious mermaids. As all men trying to fight them get lured in by their siren song, a ship filled with warrior girls is sent instead. However one of them, Meela, had a complicated past with one of the mermaids, which is brought back to life when the two reunite on the battlefield. This one is also available as an ongoing webcomic!
Borderline (The Arcadia Project trilogy) by Mishell Baker
Urban fantasy mystery. Very much of the will-they-won’t-they variety, with a bisexual lead who has a male love interest as well as a female without falling into the typical pitfalls of a love triangle. Plays around with various fucked up power dynamics. A year after a failed suicide attempt that cost her both her legs, Millie is recruited by a secretive organisation that works to control traffic to and from Arcadia, the land of faries. Bear in mind that while the sapphic-ness is present throughout, it has a much smaller presence in book 1 than books 2 and 3.
Bonus AKA I haven't read these yet but they seem really cool
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The Hunger by Whitley Strieber
Ancient vampire is on the hunt for a new partner, none of which tend to last long.
Codename Villanelle by Luke Jennings
Precursor of the famous Killing Eve tv series. While I don’t know much of the books, I did enough research to know this: their endings differ.
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kingofbodyrolls · 1 month
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My Heart's Home (m) | pjm | seven
🐴Chapter summary: Your heart aches and you feel like you see Jimin everywhere you turn, it feels suffocating. When you suddenly get a call from your sister’s doctor saying that she never made it to her appointment, dread fills your bones. 🐴Chapter title: We Got it Wrong 🐴Pairings: jimin x reader (main), jungkook x reader (only happens once in the first chapter), jungkook x OC (jessi), namjoon x OC (jessi), yoongi x hoseok, namjoon x oc, seokjin x oc, taehyung x oc 🐴Characters: female reader (isn’t mentioned by name and no “y/n”), Jimin, Jungkook, Namjoon, Yoongi, Hoseok, Seokjin, Taehyung and four female original characters. 🐴Genre/AU: ranch!au, slice of life!au, soulmate!au, cowboy!au + smut, humor, fluff, romance, slow burn and angst 🐴Rating: mature/explicit/R18 – this is mature/explicit content, so minors, please do not interact!
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🐴Disclaimer: I do not own BTS or know them personally and this work of fiction is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only. The actions and personalities described in the story do not reflect those of BTS— it’s just fiction. Also, if you would kindly read the tags/warnings before reading, that would be lovely: and if you don’t like whatever is described in the tags, just hit return and find something else to read. Thank you 🌸 🐴Chapter warnings: car accident and bleeding from a head wound (I’m sorry 😢), OC is just very sad and angry, there’s a lot of angst and stupidity (thanks to the stupid misunderstanding last chapter), lol. It will get better! But not right now 🥲 And if you feel like you need a reminder where the story is heading, read this spoiler 🫶 🐴Status: completed (the epilogue is in the works!) 🐴Word count: 9.5k 🐴Taglist: @kookswifesblog, @kiki-zb, @babejinnie, @ownthesunshine, @allie-is-a-panda, @glllhjh, @bergandysam, @13-manggaetteok, @jeonsbabygirlsworld, @antisocial-mochi267,
*tumblr isn’t letting me tag you! There could be a lot of reasons for that, check out this lovely post about it.
🐴Now playing 💿 “We Got it Wrong” by Rebecca Lavelle. [Wanna listen to the serie’s playlist?] 🐴Author’s note: in true ‘McLeod’s Daughters’ style, we open up for all the angst in this chapter! It was tough to write, and it was hard not to cry at the end. It’s more on the sad side, but the sun will shine again— don’t you worry! ☀️
It’s been cross posted to AO3 if you prefer to read there. Wanna see the book cover?
← previous | s.masterlist | m.masterlist |  next →
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“Tears for all the damage Tears for all the joy Out in the dark, alone and lost I’ll try not to destroy Any more of what we had Because we got it wrong” - ‘We Got it Wrong’ by Rebecca Lavelle
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Despite the persistent yearning for Jimin that echoes in your heart and mind, the refuge you find in your work with the wild horses becomes a haven for forgetting. In their presence, you master the art of maintaining a clear mind and keeping your emotions in check.
Otherwise, the delicate dance of gaining their trust remains elusive, and your efforts to gentle them might as well be in vain.
But sometimes maintaining a clear mind becomes a challenge, especially when the echoes of Jimin’s laughter reverberate from his house.
A frustrated sigh escapes your lips, catching Yoongi’s attention as he glances your way from his perch on the fence.
“Don’t let it get to you,” Yoongi advises, enveloping you in a comforting sideways hug to emphasize his point.
You pout, your bottom lip jutting out, eyes imploring with a softness, “Easy for you to say.”
You sigh once more, a heavy breath escaping, and a profound sense of deflation washes over you. Is this truly the path your life is destined to take?
“He’ll open up to you in due time,” he reassures, and you can’t help but erupt into a manic chuckle, a blend of frustration and disbelief escaping your lips.
“You can’t be serious. It’s been weeks, and he still hasn’t uttered a word to me. I doubt that’s going to change anytime soon,” you express with a mix of disbelief and resignation.
Yoongi relents to your sour mood, descending gracefully from the fence with a resigned sigh, his boots meeting the sand with a soft thud.
Putting your lunch away, you gracefully descend, ready to immerse yourself once more in the comforting distraction of work, hoping to reclaim a few precious hours without the weight of Jimin occupying your mind.
As you stroll alongside Yoongi, you make your way back to the stables, anticipation bubbling within you to witness the progress on the chestnut mare he’s been tirelessly dedicating nearly a month to.
The expansive stable beckons, its generous proportions dwarfing yours, illuminated by a pristine, white light that banishes the garish yellow hues of your own barn. The stalls, noticeably more capacious, could easily accommodate two fully grown horses, prompting an eye roll at the absurd fixation on size—typical men.
With a swift yet gentle command, Yoongi effortlessly guides the mare out of her stall, relying solely on his body language and the cadence of his voice, a testament to the unspoken connection he shares with the spirited creature. “Come.”
His ability to command the horse without the need for a halter or rope leaves you in awe, like witnessing a magician performing an extraordinary feat. As he imparts his tricks to you, you’ve ventured to try them yourself with Mikrokosmos, turning the experience into a magical and exhilarating connection between you and the spirited mare.
Yoongi guiding the brown mare alongside you, you exit the expansive stables and make your way back down to the pens, the rhythmic echo of hooves on the stable floor harmonizing with the subtle sounds of nature surrounding you.
Your gaze shifts to Yoongi, a spark of curiosity brightening your eyes, “Have you thought of a name for her yet?”
A soft chuckle escapes him as you approach the pen, his hand reaching for the gate, “Holly.”
With the gate ajar, Yoongi ushers Holly into the pen with a deliberate calmness. In the center, she stands like a picture of patience, anticipating his gentle approach.
“That’s a cute name,” you remark, a genuine smile playing on your lips as you savor the sweet sound of the horse’s name.
You gracefully ascend, perching on the fence as if it were your throne, offering an unrivaled view of Yoongi’s equine magic.
“What are you gonna do with Holly today?” You inquire with genuine interest, your eyes fixed on the unfolding scene before you. Yoongi approaches Holly with a gentle touch, his hands navigating the contours of the horse like an artist sculpting a masterpiece, eliciting a contented whinny that adds a musical note to the serene atmosphere.
“I’m going to ride her today,” he declares with unwavering assurance, the timbre of his voice resonating with a mix of competence and excitement. As he applies gentle pressure on Holly’s back, the horse remains still, her tail swaying lazily to ward off an annoying insect.
With a graceful ease, Yoongi begins to mount Holly, his movement akin to an acrobat suspended in mid-air, creating a whimsical and amusing spectacle. He’s not fully astride her yet, more like a playful dance over her back, a sight so unique that it tugs at the corners of your lips, tempting a restrained laugh. It’s a display of horsemanship that you’ve never encountered before, leaving you both entertained and captivated.
Holly maintains her poise as Yoongi gracefully hovers on her back, and then, in a seamless motion, he descends to the sandy ground, his landing executed with a finesse that mirrors the effortless connection he shares with the gentle mare.
He recreates the move, elevating himself further on Holly’s back, until he dangles with his head swaying on the opposite side. Your grin widens, and though you’re tempted to burst into laughter, you restrain yourself, not wanting to disturb Holly’s tranquil demeanor.
He glides down once more, approaches her head, and caresses her with a tender touch. The whole interaction exudes a gentle harmony. Returning to her side, he pulls himself up onto her back, effortlessly swinging his leg over her body, finally settling into a comfortable seat.
You’re tempted to applaud, but you resist, not wanting to startle the horse. Yet, your admiration is palpable. This marks Yoongi’s inaugural ride on Holly, a momentous achievement that leaves you thoroughly impressed!
Yoongi stretches over her withers and strokes her neck affectionately, whispering, “Good girl.”
With a subtle click of his tongue and a gentle nudge of his legs, he guides her into a slow walk around the pen, no saddle, bridle, or halter in sight. 
Color you thoroughly impressed.
You watch in silent awe as he maneuvers around the pen, his presence commanding such tranquility that you’re hesitant to disrupt the serene atmosphere by uttering even a breath.
In a breathtaking display, Holly transitions from a slow trot to a graceful canter, and Yoongi remains a steady figure atop her back. His legs maintain a gentle connection with her sides, while his hands rest calmly on her withers. A moment of pure trust unfolds as he releases his grip, extending his arms outward, allowing Holly to dance freely in circles within the pen.
Yoongi embodies the essence of liberation, and a yearning grows within you to share a similar bond of freedom with Mikrokosmos. His infectious smile meets your gaze as Holly releases a resounding snort, prompting a heartfelt chuckle to escape your lips.
Allowing Holly to race freely, Yoongi skillfully guides her by exerting a gentle pull on her withers, coaxing her spirited gallop into a graceful deceleration, transforming the wild rhythm into a serene and controlled stroll.
The distant rumble of an approaching car draws your attention away from the serene scene in the pen, and you reluctantly shift your gaze towards the source. To your dismay, Jimin’s girlfriend arrives, her car pulling up with an elegance that seems to mirror her captivating allure. Ugh. Why does she have to look that good? And why does she look so familiar?
You scrutinize the unfolding scene, watching with a mix of bitterness and resentment as she gracefully emerges from her car. Jimin, despite his limp, crosses the distance to warmly embrace her. The sight sends a surge of conflicting emotions through you – your heart tightens, your blood simmers, and your hands involuntarily clench, the tension palpable as your teeth grind together in silent frustration.
A whirlwind of emotions engulfs you, an uncontrollable storm raging within. The intensity of your feelings is staggering – a deep-seated resentment towards Deiji, a lingering hatred for Jimin himself, yet paradoxically, a persistent love that refuses to fade. The turbulence within you paints an intricate mosaic of conflicting emotions, leaving you helplessly caught in the tumultuous crosscurrents of your heart.
As Jimin leans in to bestow a chaste kiss upon her cheek, bitterness seeps through your veins, staining your soul with an ominous shade of black. Above you, an unseen tempest brews, dark clouds of despair hanging heavily, casting a shadow over your heart.
Time, instead of healing, has only fueled the flames of pain, hurt, anger, and sadness within you. Over two weeks have passed since the last encounter with Jimin and his girlfriend, yet the agony persists, as raw and piercing as if it were yesterday. Rather than easing, the passage of time seems to stoke the embers, transforming your emotions into a relentless storm of fury and jealousy that intensifies with each passing day.
Suppressing the bitterness welling up within, you shift your focus back to Yoongi and Holly. Dwelling on Jimin, the man who once went out of his way for you, retrieving you from the city, proves too agonizing for your fragile heart. 
The nagging question persists: why won’t he engage in conversation, fight for you, like he did then?
“.... Mikrokosmos?” You snap back to the present, catching the tail end of Yoongi’s question. Offering him an apologetic look, you realize you’ve been lost in your own thoughts, missing every word he carefully uttered.
You pivot to fully engage with Yoongi, deliberately tuning out the sight of the content couple in the background. “I’m sorry, I got lost in my own world. What were you saying?” you inquire with a sheepish smile, noting that Yoongi has dismounted Holly and is now giving her affectionate pats.
Yoongi draws in a breath before repeating himself, his gaze fixed on you. “I asked if you want to work on Mikrokosmos?”
With a released breath you didn’t realize you were holding, you offer him a nod. Working on Mikrokosmos is exactly what you need. As you descend from the fence, Yoongi swings open the gate, leading Holly to a paddock where she joins the other horses, letting you both focus on the task at hand.
You stride purposefully into the stables, the familiar scent of hay and warm wood enveloping you as you approach Mikrokosmos, peacefully resting in her stall.
You swing open the stall door, the hinges creaking softly in the quiet stable. With a warm smile and a voice that echoes genuine affection, you greet Mikrokosmos, “Hi Kosmos.”
Mikrokosmos ambles over, her velvety nose brushing against your outstretched hand, and she playfully nibbles, almost giving it a gentle lick. Your laughter fills the air as you shift to pat her neck. Stepping back, she follows, and you guide her down to the pen. With a practiced motion, you swing the gate open, and as she steps inside, you secure it, sealing the quiet world between you and the rest of the bustling stable.
Perched atop the fence, Yoongi assumes his vantage point, keenly observing your every move with Mikrokosmos, a silent maestro overseeing a harmonious dance between human and horse.
You guide Mikrokosmos around the pen, allowing her to explore the boundaries with curious sniffs and gentle trots. Positioned in the center, your anticipation grows as you await the elusive connection, the ’join up’ that has eluded you thus far. A subtle worry creeps in, questioning if this profound bond will ever materialize between you and the majestic creature.
“Relax and let her come to you,” Yoongi advises from his perch on the fence, a keen awareness of the frustration simmering within you.
Another sigh escapes you, a gentle release that carries your thoughts through your body and spills out through your fingertips. Surrendering to the moment, you embrace the idea that sometimes losing control is the only way to regain it. With a deliberate clearing of your mind and a slow, calming breath, you reassure yourself that everything will indeed be fine.
You surrender to the quietude, closing your eyes as you inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. 
As you focus on Mikrokosmos with closed eyes, the subtle rustle of something against the fence flares your senses. Internally cursing Yoongi for disrupting your concentration, your heightened hearing captures the gradual crescendo of hoofbeats, a rhythmic melody slowing to a gentle cadence.
The hoofbeats draw nearer, and your heart matches their slow, rhythmic approach. A mysterious sensation caresses your back, creating an anticipation that hangs in the air like a delicate promise.
With a resounding whinny, Mikrokosmos echoes her presence against your back, a triumphant melody of connection. Pride surges through you like a victorious anthem. Overwhelmed with joy, you pivot slowly, locking eyes with your equine companion, and tenderly pat her forehead, sealing the bond that has blossomed between you.
As Mikrokosmos revels in her joined connection with you, a swell of pride, you become aware of Yoongi’s gratified grin. Yet, amidst the shared triumph, your eyes catch another figure— Deiji, leaning casually against the fence, her smile mirroring the prideful moment as an unexpected witness to your accomplishment.
“That was amazing!” Her voice practically squeaks with amazement, prompting an eye roll from you.
She glances between you and Yoongi, her voice carrying a sweet and eager tone as she proposes, “I was wondering if I could assist you with the horses?” Despite her happy demeanor, you can’t quite shake off the underlying discomfort you feel in her presence.
You don’t want her help. Refusing her offer with a swift and almost brusque retort, “No.” The refusal spills from your lips with an unintended edge, its abruptness catching even Yoongi off guard. He arches an eyebrow at your firm response, a smirk playing on his lips as he finds amusement in your conviction.
Undeterred by your rejection, Jimin’s girlfriend gracefully accepts your refusal, her smile unwavering. “Okay. Please let me know if I can help you somehow,” she offers, her kindness contrasting with the tension lingering in the air.
With a hint of sarcasm, you snide at her, the forced smile on your face barely concealing the complex emotions within. You nod in acknowledgement, and as she releases her grip on the fence, she retreats gracefully towards the house, leaving you with a bittersweet taste in the air.
You stand firm in your independence, a resolute desire echoing in your mind — you don’t want assistance, especially not from her.
Yoongi gracefully descends from the fence, his presence blending seamlessly with the rhythmic strokes of your hand against Mikrokosmos, creating a moment where time seems to pause, encapsulating the essence of your shared connection with the wild horses.
“Did you really have to be so rude to her?” Yoongi chuckles beside you, his laughter a dissonant melody to the tension in the air, and you can’t help but mutter a few choice words under your breath, realizing the complexity of your emotions.
You pivot towards him, a tempest of frustration swirling in your gaze. “She is the enemy!”
His laughter persists, revealing the expanse of his gums. You exhale sharply. “I can’t have her clouding my thoughts while I’m trying to find solace in my work.”
He smirks, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Nah, I get it. You’re just yearning for that Park dick to fill you up,” he teases, winking playfully.
Your face heats up, a crimson blush spreading across your cheeks, and you shoot Yoongi an indignant glare. In a hushed tone, laced with irritation, you hiss, “Yoongi!” — wary not to disturb Mikrokosmos with your sudden outburst.
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“Are we going on another epic grocery haul?” you tease with a laugh, watching Ara expertly navigate the car towards town. The anticipation builds as you approach, eager to snatch up all the essentials Jessi has meticulously scribbled down on her ever-growing list.
The town unfolds on the horizon, and a surge of excitement bubbles within you. It’s peculiar how a routine grocery trip can evoke such giddiness. Perhaps it’s the prospect of escaping the looming presence of Jimin and Deiji that adds an unexpected thrill to the mundane task.
So far, you’ve become a master of avoiding the couple. If Jimin harbors no desire for conversation, you find yourself questioning the necessity of extending the courtesy to him or his girlfriend.
Admittedly, you’re toeing the line of childish behavior, but damn it, it’s hard to resist. The complexity of your feelings for Jimin unfolds like a tangled web. While you harbor genuine affection, it feels like your chance slipped away, and he’s unwilling to grant you the opportunity to clarify or even listen. You grasp the sting of being picked last, yet you can’t help but wonder – did you fail to convey your feelings clearly enough for Jimin to comprehend?
Damn it, you wish Yoongi never kissed you. Then this wouldn’t be happening. 
In a moment of exasperation, a heavy sigh escapes your lips. Despite the internal mandate to banish thoughts of Jimin from your mind, his presence permeates your thoughts once more, defying your attempts at self-control.
Ara skillfully guides the car into a coveted parking spot near the grocery store carts, strategically positioning you for an efficient grocery haul. The convenience of proximity promises a seamless transfer of bags from store to car, sparing you unnecessary hassle in loading up your supplies.
“I’ll go grab a cart,” you declare, pushing the car door handle. Ara, Soo-ah, and Ha-rin follow suit, emerging from the vehicle with shared anticipation for the shopping expedition.
As your fingers inch toward the cart handle, your attention is abruptly drawn to a familiar figure across the street.
Park Jimin.
Jimin and Deiji share a moment across the street, his whispered words causing her to blush and giggle. Even though their conversation is out of earshot, the infectious sound of her laughter echoes in your mind. With a scuff, you finally grasp the handlebar of the cart, but your attention remains fixed on Jimin.
He seems happy, a devilish smile gracing his lips, and you yearn for that happiness to be aimed in your direction. His fingers play through Deiji’s hair in a seductive dance, and the sight of her biting her bottom lip, restraining a moan you presume, ignites a surge of anger within you. Red dots line your vision as Jimin’s hand trails down to the small of her back, and all you can see is an intense shade of red.
“What’s the holdup?” Soo-ah quips from behind, but met with your silence, she traces the direction of your gaze instead.
“Oh no, sweetheart…” she murmurs, her voice tinged with sadness, enveloping you in a comforting embrace. A stifled sniff escapes you, tears threatening at the edge of your waterline. 
No, crying is the last thing you want to do now. Hold it in.
Your gaze remains fixated on Jimin’s intimate gestures with Deiji, and a suffocating sensation grips your chest. It’s as if the air has grown thin, and a nauseating wave washes over you, threatening to spill an unsettling mix of emotions.
The other girls gather around you, creating a supportive barrier on either side, momentarily diverting your attention from the magnetic presence of Jimin. Their friendship acts as a shield against the emotional turmoil, offering a brief respite from the intense gravitational pull of Jimin’s figure.
“I just don’t understand,” you mumble, your gaze fixated on the ground, a wave of queasiness washing over you. As you lift your eyes, they inadvertently meet Jimin’s across the road in the parking lot. The irresistible brown orbs lock onto yours, causing your breath to hitch, and your body freezes. His expression is a tumultuous mix of anger and spite, a hurtful glare that pierces through you. A small voice in your mind begins to wonder if this spiteful display is born out of pettiness, and the question lingers – would he truly be so petty?
Your heart clenches, and your hands tighten their grip on the cart’s handlebar. Will this overwhelming ache ever dissipate, or are you destined to carry this horrible feeling forever?
Soo-ah and the rest of the girls guide you away from the cart station, gently urging you into the store. Everything inside becomes a blurry haze. A strange ringing noise echoes in your ears, its origin unclear. Your heart aches with an intensity you’ve never felt, and you start to question if you’re beginning to get sick.
“Can you manage the rest? I’m not feeling well…” Your voice carries a low, deflated tone, and the sensation of your vision spinning intensifies, leaving you dizzy. The unfamiliar feeling bewilders you. The girls nod, concern evident in their eyes, yet they allow you to leave their company.
You navigate your way out of the grocery store at a deliberate pace, locate the car, unlock it, swing the door open, and plop down in the seat. Leaving the door ajar, you take in the fresh air, hoping it might provide some relief.
Exhaling deeply, you sense your heartbeat gradually slowing down, but a nagging question lingers in your mind. Is illness creeping in, or is it the persistent ache in your chest that intensifies every time Jimin comes into view? The unexplained heaviness remains, leaving you searching for answers amid the uneasy beats of your heart.
As the girls return with a brimming cart full of groceries, you muster a wry smile. Once the car is loaded, they encircle you, offering tender hugs that carry warmth and reassurance, their silent promise echoing that, despite the current storm, everything will eventually find its way to calm waters.
You secure the seat belt, and Ha-rin takes the wheel, steering you homeward. Your head finds a resting place against the window, and you gaze out with a distant stare. The scenery, painted in hues of green, blue, and gentle yellows, unfolds like a soothing watercolor, gradually lulling your weary mind into a momentary state of tranquility.
Against the cool window, you surrender to the embrace of sleep, only to find yourself entangled in dreams where deep brown eyes pierce through you with a spiteful glare, carrying the weight of disappointment. Haunted by strands of blonde hair, your heart clenches, and amidst the fragments of slumber, you grapple with the question of how things went so awry between you and Jimin.
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Every time you’re working with the wild horses, the world fades away. Jimin’s laughter, and the image of his overly joyful girlfriend, lose their vividness in the company of these majestic creatures. You don’t understand how a person can be so happy, it’s like a mystery you can’t unravel. Maybe it’s because your own mood mirrors the darkness of obsidian, overshadowing any hint of joy.
Perched atop the fence, your gaze follows Yoongi’s skilled hands at work on Holly. Today’s session involves a saddle on her back and a bridle, and you can’t help but marvel at the seamless harmony between them. Holly responds with grace, a testament to Yoongi’s expertise. In this transformative process, she inches closer to the coveted status of a fully trained stock horse, a journey Yoongi confidently assures you she’s on the brink of completing.
Your eyes trace Yoongi’s every move as he guides Holly in a mesmerizing gallop around the pen. The atmosphere is charged with a sense of calm, an unspoken understanding between rider and horse. Holly’s spirit, once untamed, now dances gracefully under Yoongi’s expert guidance, creating a scene that is both captivating and harmonious.
Yoongi’s question slices through your contemplation, catching you off guard like a sudden gust of wind. “Do you want to go for a ride?” His words, a tempting invitation, hang in the air, coaxing you to escape the confines of your thoughts and embrace the freedom that awaits on horseback.
Your eyes widen as his proposition sinks in, but you respond with a subtle nod, your silent agreement carrying the weight of anticipation.
As Holly gradually slows to a trot and then eases into a lazy walk, Yoongi reveals, “This is the final test for Holly.”
With a thoughtful expression, Yoongi shares his plan to test Holly’s adaptability in the wild. Intrigued, he proposes, “Why not venture out and seek the herd of wild horses again?” 
It might just be the escape you need from this ranch and its owner, who continues to stir uncomfortable feelings within your now delicate heart.
Jumping off the fence with a renewed sense of purpose, you stride towards the gate. As Yoongi gracefully maneuvers Holly out of the pen, you secure the gate behind you. Your journey continues with determined steps, leading you to where Marshmallow patiently awaits, reins neatly fastened to the fence.
You gently release the reins, your fingers caressing Marshmallow’s neck, eliciting a contented whinny. Placing your foot in the stirrup, you effortlessly swing your leg over his sturdy white frame. The moment you settle into the saddle, a profound sense of belonging washes over you, soothing your restless soul. The inexplicable bond between you and horses never fails to astound you, creating a sanctuary of comfort with every ride.
With a tender smile, your heart lightens, and you delicately urge Marshmallow into a trot by applying subtle pressure with your legs. As you follow Yoongi, the rhythmic beat of hooves creates a symphony that resonates with the newfound tranquility within you.
Embarking on a journey over the rolling hills, the grass beneath remains an enchanting green, bathed in the warmth of lingering summer. A gradual canter carries you through the landscape, your thoughts dissipating, leaving space for the soothing breeze to play with your hair, accompanied by the rhythmic pulse of hooves that mirrors the cadence of your own heart.
Lost in the passage of time, the duration of your ride eludes you, the profound silence between you and Yoongi accentuating the harmony of nature. The mountains, standing proud and towering in the distant horizon, seem to extend warm embraces, enveloping you in a sense of belonging to this picturesque landscape.
As you traverse the landscape, the familiarity of the woods, the serene lake where laughter once echoed with Jessi, and the expansive paddocks that seem to stretch endlessly into the horizon become a poignant backdrop to the rhythm of your horse’s hooves.
The wind tousles your hair, and there’s a fleeting sense that, perhaps, everything is gradually finding its way to being alright.
Lost in the vast expanse, you ride on, the anticipation building within you, wondering if today will be another day the wild horses grace you with their presence. The landscape sprawls before you, an unfamiliar tapestry of nature’s secrets waiting to be unveiled.
As you speak, a soft melancholy smile graces your lips, “I don’t think we’ll see them today, Yoongi.” Despite the disappointment, you hold onto the hope that eluded you, a silent acknowledgment that not everything unfolds as desired—recent events serving as a poignant reminder of life’s unpredictable nature.
“I don’t even know where we are,” you sigh, bringing the horses to a gentle trot. Your gaze sweeps across the expansive landscape, a moment of shared uncertainty between you and Yoongi. 
“I know where we are, don’t worry,” Yoongi assures you, confidence lacing his voice as you both come to a full stop before a vast and lush forest. 
You release the reins, allowing Marshmallow to lower his head and graze on the lush grass, while Holly follows suit. Holly’s remarkable behavior on this ride surprises you; her wild and untamed nature seamlessly hidden beneath a calm exterior. If it weren’t for her untamed origins, she could easily pass as a seasoned stock horse, blending effortlessly into the peaceful scenery.
While allowing Marshmallow and Holly to graze peacefully, their heads suddenly snap up, ears perked forward in unison, attuned to a sound that hasn’t yet reached your own ears. Then, like a wave crashing over you, the familiar rhythm of hooves pounding against the earth becomes clear – a wild and untamed symphony echoing through the air.
As the herd of wild horses materializes in the distance, a charismatic dark brown stallion commands the front, orchestrating the untamed ballet of freedom. They present a majestic spectacle, embodying the essence of the wild – eyes reflecting untold stories, a blend of soulful wisdom and mischievous spirit. With a profound exhale, you find yourself immersed in a deep appreciation for these creatures and the untamed nature that surrounds you.
Holly stands poised, her gaze locked onto the passing herd, perhaps recognizing the familiar faces of her once-wild family. Despite the untamed energy coursing through the herd, she remains steadfast, mirroring your own stance, both of you immersed in silent observation.
The sight of the wild horses in full gallop is nothing short of breathtaking, and as they surge across the landscape, a surge of emotion tightens your heart in your chest, leaving you captivated by the untamed beauty unfolding before your eyes.
In a hushed and reverent tone, you marvel, “They are so beautiful,” your words barely more than a breath, yet carrying the weight of admiration. A subtle nod from Yoongi acknowledges the shared appreciation of the magnificent spectacle before you.
As your heart swells with longing, a sense of crushing desire envelops you, wishing for the freedom these majestic horses possess—to express your truth and embrace the things you yearn for in life. The ache intensifies, a silent plea echoing in the vast expanse of the open landscape.
Your hands clutch the reins, and a damp sensation draws your attention. Glancing down, you discover small droplets of water clinging to your skin. A subtle sniffle escapes you, and it dawns on you—tears cascade down your cheeks, marking your hands with the tangible evidence of your silent emotional storm.
A constriction tightens your chest, and you draw in a deep breath, hoping to ease the pressure, only to release it in a slow exhale. The rhythm of your breath echoes the emotional turbulence within.
Yoongi’s gaze gently turns in your direction, his expression a silent symphony of understanding. No words escape his lips, yet the warmth of a caring smile lingers, offering a comforting embrace in the quietude between you.
You lift a trembling hand to your face, attempting to quell the rebellious tears that seem to have a life of their own. Your breath quickens, a desperate effort to steady your heart and rein in the tumultuous tide of emotions.
With a tear-streaked face, you turn to Yoongi, your eyes carrying the weight of a profound sadness. “Have you ever loved someone so much, it feels like you’re suffocating?”
Your heart carries the weight of your confession, a mix of both burden and liberation. The unspoken truth finally escapes your lips, echoing in the quiet spaces of your soul. Your feelings for Jimin, profound and unyielding, create a storm within, rendering you incapable of coherent thought, drowning in irrationality and a bitter sea of jealousy.
“Yeah,” he utters with a weighted exhale, the weight of that single syllable hangs thick in the air, a tangible presence in the shared space between you. Compassion wells up within you, not just for him, but for your own tender heart. Silent tears continue their descent, accompanied by a subdued sniffle that punctuates the shared vulnerability in the moment.
“I’m so sorry.”
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Grumbling under your breath, you meticulously tend to the veggie garden, methodically extracting weeds and inspecting the plants for any sign of ripe fruit. Kneeling on a plush mat to provide respite for your beleaguered knees, your hands adorned with protective gloves, ensuring that both your hands and fingers remain shielded as you immerse yourself in the nurturing care of the flourishing garden.
Amidst the monotony of this laborious task, you find yourself immersed in the meticulous chore of weeding, the unfortunate bearer of the short straw today. Rows of carrots and potatoes bear witness to your diligent efforts as you navigate through the verdant expanse, determined to extract every intrusive weed that dares encroach upon the fertile soil.
Lost in contemplation, the rhythmic cadence of footsteps stealthily closes in on you, their approach unheard in the sanctuary of your introspective musings.
“Hi, I’m going into town,” your sister’s sudden announcement startles you from your gardening reverie. As you look up, her intent gaze meets yours, a tapestry of confusion woven into your expression.
“Why are you heading into town? Weren’t you supposed to tackle the tax today?” you inquire, your hands continuing their task of pulling stubborn weeds from the soil.
“I have that doctor’s appointment, remember?” Her raised eyebrow prompts a silent scold for forgetting such an important detail.
Panic flickers in your eyes as you abruptly halt your weeding, staring at your sister with genuine concern. “When did you mention the doctor’s appointment? Is everything okay?” Worry lines crease your forehead, a mix of surprise and anxiety clouding your expression.
With a light chuckle, she tries to alleviate your concerns, “Just a routine checkup, no big deal!” Her laughter carries a reassuring tone, and as she waves, the softness in her expression mirrors the warmth that envelops you.
You return her smile, your gaze lingering as she strolls away toward the yard, where the cars patiently wait.
“See you later,” she calls with a wave. From your perch in the veggie garden, you observe her unlocking the car, slipping into the driver’s seat of the pickup truck. The tail lights illuminate briefly, transitioning to brake lights before shifting to the soft glow of white. Jessi maneuvers in reverse, the wheels crunching on the dirt road as she disappears toward town.
As you return to the arduous task of pulling weeds, you find yourself grappling with the relentless tendrils of frustration, a silent curse escaping your lips like a rebellious whisper. Resigned to the fate of having drawn the shortest straw, you navigate through the sea of stubborn greenery, each tug of resistance echoing the monotony of your predicament.
Beneath the blazing midday sun, gratitude washes over you for the protective refuge of your hat, casting a welcomed shadow upon both your face and neck. Yet, despite this shield, beads of perspiration dance down your forehead, a testament to the unexpected physical rigor of the task at hand. The sheer demand of the job dawns upon you, surpassing your initial expectations. 
Anticipating the aftermath, you realize the likelihood of waking up tomorrow with sore arms, an inevitability intensified if you neglect the crucial post-labor ritual of stretching your fatigued muscles.
Emerging victorious from your laborious undertaking, you navigate your way into the kitchen, a sanctuary promising respite in the form of an icy glass of water. As the fridge door swings open, a cascade of cool air envelops your sweat-drenched face, offering a fleeting reprieve before you reluctantly seize the chilled jug. Your quest for relief continues as you reach for an overhead cabinet, extracting a glass that promises salvation. The sensation of the glass against your palms is a prelude to the ecstasy that follows as you pour the water, savoring its frosty embrace. With each indulgent gulp, the frigid liquid becomes a balm, soothing the searing heat that has claimed your body in this relentless weather.
Savoring the rejuvenating coolness, you lean leisurely against the countertop, the glass of water a welcome oasis in your hands. Just as the refreshing liquid begins to work its magic, Soo-ah strides into the kitchen, her expression twisted into a weird frown.
Your discerning gaze sweeps over Soo-ah’s form, a subtle intuition whispering that something is amiss, yet the unspoken question lingers on your lips. Before you can voice your inquiry, she breaks the pregnant silence, her words hanging in the air like a cryptic prelude. “Have you seen Jessi?”
A subtle tremor courses through your being as you dismissively shake your head, “She’s in town for a doctor’s appointment.” 
A shadow of concern paints Soo-ah’s features as she deftly retrieves her phone from the depths of her pocket, her eyes flicking to the screen with a mixture of urgency and unease. “How long has she been gone?”
A ripple of disquiet snakes its way through you, fueled by Soo-ah’s restive demeanor. Methodically, you rewind the clock in your mind, tallying the hours since Jessi’s presence graced your sight. “About five hours,” you declare, the admission carrying a weight that coils into an unsettling sense of foreboding.
Weariness etches itself deeper into Soo-ah’s countenance, her features now a canvas painted with both fatigue and concern. Your heartbeat quickens, a subtle but undeniable jolt, as the realization takes hold—this is not merely a cause for concern, but an ominous sign that tightens its grip around your heart, intensifying the ominous gravity of the moment.
A sudden, piercing ring shatters the stillness, and your gaze instinctively darts towards the source—a resonating chime from the landline. The air tightens around you, your heartbeat accelerating into a rapid cadence, each breath shallow and tense. A palpable wave of dread courses down your spine, a cold shiver that heralds an impending revelation. Locking eyes with Soo-ah, both of you stand frozen, caught in the ominous limbo between the echoing ring and the unknown that awaits on the other end of the line.
You should pick it up dammit! A stern scolding echoing in your mind, compelling your body into animated motion that seems detached from your own will. With a sense of urgency, you traverse the space to the countertop, your hand stretching out towards the ringing phone. As your fingertips make contact with the cream-colored plastic, a surge of anxiety courses through them, a prelude to the unknown that awaits on the other end. The plastic yields beneath the pressure of your grip, and in the hushed anticipation, you lift the receiver, your voice steady but laced with an undercurrent of tension. 
“Hello, Bora Ranch. How can I help you?”
The voice on the other end of the line weaves a narrative that acts like a chilling undertow, dragging your heart into an abyss of despair. Your hand involuntarily tightens around the phone, a desperate grip as if it were your sole connection to a vanishing lifeline.
The voice on the other end, that of the doctor’s receptionist, cuts through the air, delivering news that lands with a disconcerting weight. 
“We’re calling to let you know that Jessi missed her appointment today, and we wanted to know if she wants to reschedule another one?” 
You then realize that weird feeling you’ve been having— this isn’t good.
A furrow etches itself onto your brow, the cord winding around your other hand as if trying to anchor you in a moment slipping out of your control. “She hasn’t come home yet. Can I get back to you?” 
The words hang in the air, delivered with a voice that quivers with a blend of unease and uncertainty, as you begin to grasp what this means.
The receptionist’s agreement is a somber symphony in your ears before bidding goodbye. With a heart weighed down by the gravity of the call, you delicately place the receiver back in its cradle. As your eyes shift back to Soo-ah, her visage mirrors your own unsettled state, her features etched with a shared tension, a palpable reflection of the worry that swirls between you like an unspoken storm.
A thick silence hangs in the air, pregnant with unspoken fears. 
Soo-ah, unable to bear the weight any longer, shatters the tension like fragile glass. “Well, what is it?” Her words cut through the quiet, a desperate plea for answers.
You’re afraid.
Dread coils around your words, a vice grip on your throat as you grapple with the weight of unspoken fears. The hesitation lingers, but the urgency pushes you to break the silence. “Jessi never made it to her appointment…” 
You observe the subtle transformation in Soo-ah’s face, a haunting dance between anguish and concern. 
“Well, where is she then?” Soo-ah demands, her voice betraying an unsteady cadence that mirrors the delicate balance of the unspoken question hanging in the air, as if the answer hinges on your words. Your gaze reflects uncertainty, exhaling a breath heavy with the weight of the unknown.
“I think something bad has happened to her,” your voice wavers, the admission reluctant and laden with a vulnerability that you wish could be erased. The words, heavy with an unwelcome truth, carry the weight of a foreboding certainty that reverberates deep within your bones—an ominous resonance that refuses to be silenced.
Soo-ah, with her once sun-kissed complexion drains of its warmth, now veering into an eerie, almost gray pallor. A whisper of worry taints her words as she utters, “We should call Jungkook.” 
With a solemn nod, you reach for your phone, fingers betraying a subtle tremor as you punch in Jungkook’s number. As you raise the phone to your ear, the weight of the impending conversation echoes in the hollow space between each ring.
Holding your breath, time stretches into an agonizing eternity as you strain to listen to each ring, each heartbeat resonating in the charged stillness. The suspense tightens like a coil around your chest until, finally, a tremulous exhale escapes as Jungkook’s voice breaks the silence.
“This is Kook.”
An instant paralysis grips your vocal cords, a sudden constriction that renders your throat a silent battleground, incapable of surrendering even a solitary word. 
“What’s wrong?” Jungkook’s inquiry pierces the heavy silence, his voice carrying a note of concern that seems to reverberate through the unspoken void on the other end of the line.
A glacial stillness descends upon you, an icy grip that renders you immobile. 
Words, elusive and stubborn, refuse to surface. Soo-ah’s worried gaze lingers on you, but in a decisive sweep, she snatches the phone from your ear, her move cutting through the stasis like a sudden gust of wind disrupting a frozen landscape. 
“Hi, it’s Soo-ah. We need your help,” her voice, a steady prelude to the storm brewing beneath the surface, carries the weight of urgency as she unfolds the crucial details. “Jessi left for a doctor’s appointment, but she never made it, and it’s been five hours now. We’re afraid something has happened… Will you help us search for her?”
The murmur of Jungkook’s response on the other end remains elusive to your ears, but Soo-ah, in a breathy exhale that holds a universe of gratitude, utters a heartfelt, “Thank you.” She returns your lifeline– the phone, with a subtle yet meaningful gesture, restoring it to your hands as if passing the torch for the impending journey into the unknown. 
“He’ll be here in 10 minutes to pick you up,” she discloses, the gravity of her concern etching deeper creases onto her forehead. 
“What are you gonna do then?” The words burst from you, riding the crest of a wave formed by a potent mix of frustration and worry, their resonance echoing in the room. 
“I’m going to stay here… In case she comes home,” she reveals, her commitment to a vigil laden with unspoken hope. But then, almost as an afterthought, she adds, “or if the hospital calls.” 
The weight of her last admission sends a sinking feeling through your chest, an acknowledgment of the gravity of the situation. Understanding settles in, and you offer a solemn nod, bracing yourself for Jungkook’s imminent arrival as the silent countdown to unravel the mystery begins.
Before the sleek silhouette of his black pickup truck materializes, the air is sliced by the cacophony of tires screeching—a desperate symphony of grip and resistance against the unforgiving dirt, an audible testament to the urgency that propels Jungkook towards the yard.
You dash outside, the urgent thud of your footsteps aligning with the accelerating heartbeat of the moment. Jungkook hurtles down the driveway, a kinetic force in his speeding vehicle that screeches to a dramatic halt before you. The window rolls down, revealing a face etched with determination, and he hollers, “Get in.” 
Obediently following his command, you seize the door handle, leaping into the truck with a hurried intensity. The door barely has time to shut before Jungkook slams his foot on the accelerator, leaving a swirling cloud of sand in the wake of the roaring vehicle. 
Worry etches deep lines into his face, transforming his normally composed features into a tapestry of concern. His lips press into a stern line, and his eyes, laser-sharp, pierce through the windshield, scanning the road ahead. The white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel betrays a tension that courses through him, turning his knuckles into pale anchors of anxiety. 
“What the hell happened?” The words slice through the air, dripping with a demanding tone that carries an undertone of a hiss, a viper’s sharpness in each syllable. 
Turning toward him, you admit with a meekness that hangs in the air, “I don’t know.” Your voice, a delicate whisper, contrasts with the clenching of your hands over your pants, while your bottom lip falls victim to the anxious bite of nerves. Fuck.
The weight of hope and fear interlaces in your thoughts—desperately wishing Jessi is safe, yet haunted by the gnawing question of why, if she is, hasn’t she reached out? 
Jungkook maneuvers the vehicle like a man possessed, hurtling down the lone road that unravels into town with a velocity that borders on recklessness. This is Jessi’s path, the very route she would undoubtedly have traversed. 
Your heart orchestrates a frenzied symphony of worry and fear, its rapid tempo matching the breakneck speed at which Jungkook propels the truck forward. 
The uneven terrain jolts beneath the truck’s tires, a relentless assault on the vehicle as it hurtles down these rugged, neglected roads. The coarse reality of the battered path becomes starkly apparent with every bone-rattling bump, each pothole a testament to the less-than-ideal conditions. 
“Slow down unless you want us to crash!” You warn him in a stern voice as desperation fuels your words and you clutch the handle at the top of the truck, your knuckles turning white as you seek stability amid the turbulent velocity. 
He merely huffs, an audible dismissal that betrays the resilience of his determination. It’s evident that your words struggle to penetrate the thick armor of his focus. However, your own concerns take precedence, and the prospect of a car accident looms like an ominous specter in the midst of your search for Jessi. 
“Fucking slow down or let me drive!” The urgency in your yell slices through the truck, a desperate ultimatum that demands immediate action. A tangible flinch from Jungkook, beside you, signals the impact of your words. With a reluctant release, he eases his right foot off the gas pedal, and the once-roaring speed of the vehicle unravels into a gradual deceleration. 
“Thank you,” you declare with a furious edge, your gratitude tinged with the lingering urgency of the search.
Jungkook skillfully guides the turn with a precise speed, threading the needle between velocity and caution. As the vehicle emerges from the curve, the truth unravels before your eyes. 
A sight that sends your heart plummeting, and an unspoken pact of dread settles between you and Jungkook, a bone-chilling silence that engulfs the interior of the truck. 
There it is, the all-too-familiar white pickup truck, an unexpected apparition right before you, nestled on the side of the road. It’s not parked; it’s crumbled against a tree. 
Jungkook wrenches his truck to a sudden halt, the engine silenced with a precision that echoes the urgency of the moment. In a flash, he bolts out of the car, a whirlwind of determination propelling him towards the scene. You trail closely in his wake, the echoes of your pounding heart reverberating alongside a disorienting ringing in your ears.
You sprint towards the crumpled wreckage, the front of the car wedged against the unforgiving tree. Panic fuels your frantic search for your sister amidst the twisted metal. Jungkook beats you to the driver’s side, and in a desperate attempt to catch a glimpse, you tiptoe over his shoulders. 
The chilling reality reveals itself—blood stains the window, and Jessi’s head, eyes closed, rests against it in an unsettling image. 
Fuck.
“Jessi!” The desperate cry erupts from deep within you, a primal howl behind Jungkook, and you resort to clawing at his back in a futile attempt to let you pass. However, he remains an immovable barrier, unyielding in his protective stance. 
His hand extends, a forceful gesture that wards you off, and his demanding tone slices through the charged air, declaring, “No, let me.”
You cease your futile attempt to scratch through the barrier of Jungkook’s back, relinquishing control to his judgment. Your gaze fixates on the unfolding scene as he seizes the door handle, pounding on the window while the fervent echo of your sister’s name reverberates through the stagnant air. 
A leaden weight settles upon your heart, dragging it down to depths unknown, and you slump to the unforgiving ground beside the truck. The haunting question hangs in the air, an unspoken fear clawing at your consciousness—could she be dead?
Tears threaten to spill from your eyes, a poignant manifestation of your helplessness, as you watch the scene unfold. The overwhelming sense of uselessness engulfs you like a suffocating shroud because Jungkook, with his determined insistence, bars you from contributing to the unfolding crisis. 
Jungkook channels every ounce of his strength into wrenching the door handle, a Herculean effort that, to your dismay, yields no success. Undeterred, he pivots, striding purposefully around the car to attack the problem from the passenger’s side. The moment of truth arrives as the door finally acquiesces to his relentless determination, swinging open with a sudden release of pent-up tension. Jungkook, caught off guard by the door’s sudden compliance, is propelled backward, almost airborne, a visceral testament to the raw force he exerted in the pursuit of accessing the vehicle’s interior.
With a determined crawl into the cabin, Jungkook bridges the agonizing gap between hope and despair, finally reaching your sister. The urgency in his voice echoes through the air as he commands, “Call an ambulance!”
You rise from the unforgiving ground, a determined surge of adrenaline coursing through your veins. With swift precision, you extract your phone, fingers dancing with urgency as you dial those three critical numbers. 
“Is she alive?” The question hangs in the air, a fragile whisper that dares not disturb the gravity of the moment. Holding your breath, you await his answer, the air thick with the weight of an impending revelation that could reshape the contours of your reality. 
“She’s breathing,” Jungkook exhales, his voice carrying the weight of relief, a momentary respite from the tension. You approach the driver’s window, eyes fixed on your sister’s form. The sight of her chest rising and falling in a slow, deliberate rhythm becomes a visual anchor, a palpable reassurance that she clings to life. 
Well, that’s good.
Cradling the phone to your ear, you navigate the urgent conversation, orchestrating a plea for the ambulance to converge on your dire location. The proximity of the ranch intensifies the raw reality—you aren’t that far away. A sinking feeling grips your heart as you grasp the cruel expanse of time she’s endured out here, alone and injured. 
Jungkook delicately prods Jessi’s arm, a gesture pregnant with hope, yet the anticipated response remains elusive—a disheartening void that echoes the uncertainty of the situation. 
“I know it looks bad, but we shouldn’t move her. It’s best to wait for the paramedics,” Jungkook utters reluctantly from the passenger’s seat.
You acknowledge the truth in his words, but your gaze lingers on Jessi, a silent witness to the vivid evidence of her injuries—blood seeping from her head. The unsettling unknown looms large, a haunting question mark etched across your thoughts—what other wounds might she be concealing beneath the shadows of her stillness? 
The wait for the ambulance unfolds like a nightmarish blur until the air is pierced by the sound of a low voice. Both you and Jungkook pivot, your gazes converging on your sister, a crescendo of fear and anticipation reaching its zenith. 
Jessi stirs, her murmurs threading through the air, but the coherence of her words eludes understanding. As her eyes tentatively flutter open, a feeble attempt to articulate follows, yet the utterances emerge as a nonsensical cascade, the syllables twisted into a form of gibberish. 
“It’s okay. You’ve been in a car accident, and the ambulance is on its way,” Jungkook reassures, his words a tender balm delivered with a gentle caress on your sister’s cheek. Tears shimmer in his eyes, a raw display of his emotional turmoil, as his calloused fingers delicately trace the curve of her cheekbone.
Her head pivots towards you, eyes finally unveiling an unspoken distance, their luster dimmed. A pang reverberates through your chest as you meet her gaze—her eyes, once vibrant, now bear the weight of an unspoken ordeal. The visceral urge to pull her from the confinements of the wreck claws at your heart. Oh, why can’t you just extract her from this damn car, ensuring her safety and whisking away the haunting uncertainty that clings to the moment? 
“It’s going to be okay,” Jungkook utters, his voice quivering with a blend of reassurance and uncertainty that reverberates through the air. His attempt at strength is palpable, yet the vulnerability seeps through the cracks as tears cascade down his face.
Yet amidst the chaos, a fervent hope takes root within you, a beacon amid the storm of uncertainty. A silent plea echoes in the depths of your being, transcending mere optimism, as you yearn—truly, desperately, for everything to unfold in a way that defies the ominous shadows cast by the present.
The wail of the ambulance siren pierces the air, heralding the arrival of salvation, and it swiftly aligns next to Jungkook’s car. A flurry of activity ensues as paramedics spill out, each armed with purposeful bags. Amidst the orchestrated urgency, some of them extract a stretcher from the belly of the ambulance.
Jungkook emerges from the car, gracefully ceding the realm to the paramedics, and approaches your side. His arm envelops your trembling frame, a silent reassurance amidst the tumult. No words pass between you as the paramedics meticulously cut the seatbelt, delicately affix a collar around Jessi’s neck, their movements choreographed in a synchronized ballet of urgency. 
Within the orchestrated chaos, a paramedic deploys a machine, its mechanical whir echoing through the night, to pry open the driver’s door. Simultaneously, another paramedic stands sentinel, ensuring Jessi remains securely in place, a guardian against the imminent void that will unfold once the door is relinquished.
The scene is gruesomely vivid, and an involuntary welling of tears clouds your vision as the brutal reality sets in. Leaning into Jungkook’s unwavering presence, you find solace in the haven of his steady frame, though your sniffling breaths betray the emotional maelstrom within. As your tears mingle with his on the fabric of your shirt, a silent communion of shared vulnerability takes root.
With meticulous care, the paramedics lift Jessi from the driver’s side, each movement deliberate and measured as they lay her down on the stretcher. The air hangs heavy with collective breath, your own held in a suspended moment of agonizing anticipation. The constriction in your chest intensifies, a sensation of breathlessness seizing you. Seeking an anchor in the chaos, you find Jungkook’s hand, fingers interlocking in a tight, desperate grip—a physical manifestation of the silent plea echoing within as you navigate the precipice of uncertainty.
“We’ll transport her to the hospital in town. You can follow us if you want,” one of the paramedics offers, their words a lifeline in the tumultuous sea of emotions. Gratitude courses through you, and you manage a nod of appreciation, though the knot in your throat constricts your ability to voice your thanks. 
Your gaze lingers on the departing ambulance, the doors sealing your sister’s fate within its sterile embrace. A quiet sniffle punctuates the lingering echoes of the departure. When you turn to Jungkook, his face bears the marks of tear-streaked sorrow, a testament to the profound love he harbors for your sister. The depth of his emotions mirrors the tumult within you, both bound by an unspoken yearning for everything to be right—for the fractures to heal and the shadows to dissipate in the face of an uncertain journey that now stretches before you.
The ambulance departs, leaving a gritty trail of dirt in its wake, a visual metaphor for the unsettling uncertainty now etched into your reality. Your gaze lingers on the vacated space it once occupied, a void that echoes the fear reverberating within. The future looms before you, an ominous terrain shrouded in ambiguity, and you grapple with the unrelenting questions that cast shadows on the path ahead.
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Author’s note(2): Thank you so much for reading! 🌸 I would very much appreciate it if you reblogged the chapter, if you liked it ✨ A small review or a comment would also mean a lot to me, and even a like. But please, don’t be afraid to let me know what you think; your kind words makes me extremely happy 💜
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kindlingkeen · 28 days
Note
hello ~ about your series asymmetrical warfare will there be a bruce-jason reunion? what was their dynamic before jason died? does bruce treat jason as his greatest failure the way he did in comics? (ignore if spoilers ofc) thanks!
Hi anon, thanks for your ask! Great questions (really respect that you went for the meaty one right out of the gate there /pos). Let me start out by not answering your questions at all, and I’ll work my way up to some answers.
I’ve mentioned in other posts that I don’t have a concrete outline in place when I write. There are things that I know will happen in Asymmetrical Warfare, and things that I know absolutely will not. In between all of that, there’s wiggle room, a lot of wiggle room. Something that I love about writing fanfiction is that, to me, it’s this neat form of collaborative story telling. At it’s core, AW is my version of the batfam and the story I want to tell about them, but it’s very much influenced by readers and the fandom at large (mostly via its tumblr presence). Comments on ao3, asks on tumblr, random internet convos, the comics I read, all of it influences how I think about AW. (For example, Harm Reduction basically exists solely in response to ao3 comments.) It brings a complexity and richness to AW that wouldn’t be there if I was alone in a vacuum writing the ‘verse from start to finish.
So, how does that relate to your questions…
will there be a bruce-jason reunion?
I honestly don’t know. Most of AW has the ‘identity porn’ tag attached to it. The ‘identity reveal’ tag doesn’t start coming in to play until the end of what I have sketched out so far. When I think about what comes after that, it’s all fade to black. I can make an educated guess based on core character traits, what’s happened so far, and the fixed events/timepoints I know are coming. But, it’s still open to infinite possibilities. At least until the timeline advances further and more details get locked down. The Storm, the arc that comes after Territorial Disputes (the companion piece to Guerrilla Tactics), is a pretty big inflection point. It’s also, you know, not written yet. 😉
what was their dynamic before jason died?
The granular details here are still evolving in my mind, but it’s built on a backbone of a mixed pre- and post- crisis Bruce and Jason. Jason was adopted at 12. They had a father/son dynamic. Bruce was genuinely trying to be a good dad, and he succeeded a lot of the time. Things got rough later on in Jason’s teenage years.
does bruce treat jason as his greatest failure the way he did in comics?
I’m not sure if you’re referring to how Bruce treated Jason’s memory during the period while Jason was presumed dead in the comics, or how Jason is actually treated post his reappearance in the comics, but here’s what I’ll say with respect to the former and AW. The AW Batcave has a Robin memorial with a ‘good solider’ plaque on it. AW Tim is well versed in the dangers of being reckless via the object lesson that is Jason Todd. Sometimes, late at night, usually after a bottle of whiskey or a dose of the good painkillers, AW Bruce thinks about how his greatest failure in life is actually how he’s chosen to cope with the death of his son.
Thanks again for the ask, anon! Hopefully this was as interesting to read as it was for me to write! My ask box is always open 🩵
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dreadfutures · 19 days
Text
Fanfic Writer Questions
Tagged by @plisuu and @rosella-writes - and tagging the whole rest of the DA FanFic server crew:
@warpedlegacy @rakshadow @effelants @bluewren @breninarthur @ar-lath-ma-cully @ir0n-angel @inquisimer @crackinglamb @theluckywizard @nirikeehan @oxygenforthewicked @exalted-dawn-drabbles @melisusthewee @blarrghe @agentkatie @delicatefade @leggywillow @about2dance
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
49
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
1,645,298
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Maximum Ride, Pokemon, Spirited Away, Zelda, Pathfinder CRPGs, Elden Ring, Dishonored, and of course, Dragon Age
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Dead Pasts and Dread Futures (Dragon Age)
Hero of the Wild (Legend of Zelda: BOTW)
When the Wind Whispers (Legend of Zelda: BOTW)
The Brave Guide (Dragon Age)
Light in the Dark (LOZ)
5. Do you respond to comments?
Yes! I try to. I fall behind very frequently but I always try to say thank you. So many people tell me why these stories touch them, and to share that with me, is such a gift that deserves acknowledgement.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Probably 'The Hope of Fen'Harel' (on AO3) or the scene where Solas finds out that young Ixchel is dead (here on tumblr).
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
the road seems too wild for mixing it with blues (Dragon Age) - literally it is a Solavellan happiest of happy endings. There are brown butter donuts.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Yes. Not infrequently.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Sometimes! I do try to write titillating smut but if it's in my longfics, it's got to be for character reasons and serve the plot. But I have more than one smut oneshot that's just there to get people hot lol.
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
No.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
I have had ideas copied wholecloth.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Not that I know of, but you are free to do so as long as you tag me and properly credit via the "inspired by" on AO3
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yes! ALL of my Maximum Ride fics were co-written. Literally sending passages back and forth over *yahoo instant messenger.* It was an absolute fucking joy. Those fics are gone now though lol.
14. What's your all time favorite ship?
Prooooooobablyyyyyyy Haku/Chihiro. I will read absolute drivel if it's got them in it.
15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
I WILL ABSOLUTELY FINISH MY BOTW FICS I AM WORKING ON THEM OKAY?! The one i don't think i will ever do is my young!Ixchel fic. It's too fucking sad. But it lives in my head and calls to me.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Dreamy prose, evocative horror, and really motivated plots.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I'm verbose, I have a hard time connecting scenes / passing time without it feeling like it's dragging.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
So, for fantasy languages that you have to conlang -- I think you should just write it in English. Especially if you're not making up YOUR OWN conlang and instead relying on the work of a notorious jackass. I have taken to "[[brackets and italics]]" to indicate when dialogue is happening in Elvhen. In real life languages, such as Spanish, the current movement in ownvoices communities is to include the dialogue in its original tongue, with no italics. Readers are smart. They can look it up. And they need to get used to languages other than their own without it seeming other, alien, or magical. In my original novels, where Spanish is often used, I stick with this rule.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Maximum Ride or Spirited Away.
20. Favorite fic you've written?
it ends or it doesn't (Dragon Age), my Felassan-as-Benoit-Blanc arlathvhen murder mystery!
blank form below:
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
3. What fandoms do you write for?
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
5. Do you respond to comments?
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
8. Do you get hate on fics?
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
14. What's your all time favorite ship?
15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
16. What are your writing strengths?
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
19. First fandom you wrote for?
20. Favorite fic you've written?
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istorkyou · 1 year
Text
The Price Of Love (Modern!Ivar AU)
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A Modern!Ivar x F Reader
Warnings - See individual chapters. STRICTLY 18+
Synopsis - Money isn’t everything.
Word Count - 1584
Note - This is the second fic I ever wrote and I’m not sure why I never posted it. I think I started writing The Arrangement not long after and kind of fell out of love with this one. Still, it’s been festering in my completed docs for well over a year so I figure I might as well post it 😬 It’s fluffy, and maybe a little cheesy (and by a little I mean a lot!) so if that’s your bag I hope you enjoy it!
Moodboard - The beautiful moodboard is made the magical, amazing @serasvictoria. Thank you so much xxxx
This was beta read by my aussie wife who has left Tumblr. All love, all the time Lou x
Tag List - Let me know if you want on or off :)@smears-and-spots @punkrocknpearls​​ @youbloodymadgenius​​ @momowhoo​​ @zuxiezendler​​ @not-another-viking-fanfic-blog​ @ivar-s-my-brat-tamer​ @pieces-by-me​ @heavenly1927​​ @berryonasummerevening @synnersaint​​ @out-of-the-box-and-into-alchemy​ @petite-hime​​ @serasvictoria​​ @mimiiinspace​​ @itsmysticalmystery​​ @lonewolf471​​ @mylifeisactuallyamess​​ @draculasbride-blog​​ @love-all-things-writing​​ @southernbe​​ @redhead7799​​ @kaybee87​​ @ivarlover​​ @ivarhoegh​​ @idgafiamallthefandoms​​ @darkphoenix5037​​ @profoundtyrantharmony​​ @snarling-through-our-smiles​​ @crazyunsexycool​​ @xceafh​​ @bragisrunes​​@noway4u @batmandallyboy​​ @complicatedbutrare @readsalot73​​​​ @meandmycherrytree @mymindfuckery
Masterpost
CHAPTER 15
Nine months of dating Ivar. Nine months of happiness. Nine months of amazing sex. Nine month of love.
The interest in your relationship publicly has definitely reduced, mostly because the pair of you don’t go anywhere the photographers would be. Ivar has adapted to your lifestyle easily and fits into your world perfectly. You still struggle sometimes fitting into his world, but you are getting better at the glitzy parties and rubbing shoulders with the extreme wealth in your city. You much prefer it when you guys do normal things together though.
You have become friends with his brothers, they were easily won over, especially Hvitserk. He and Iris have been on a few dates and he seems besotted with her. She likes him a lot but is being very ‘Iris’ about the whole thing and is playing it cool.
Ubbe is dating someone new and, aside from cracking a couple of jokes in the beginning, leading Ivar to threaten to murder him, in a seriously scary tone, your ‘thing’ is long forgotten.
Since the ball you haven’t seen too much of Aslaug, she has been away, staying in her house in Iceland for months.
She calls you the week she gets home and she comes to visit your shop.
You bond over your mutual love of fashion. She spends a long time looking through all the clothes you stock and buys some dresses and some jewellery.
“You have a really good eye, Y/N. A wonderfully eclectic mix of fashion in stock. Have you thought about expanding? Opening more boutiques across the city?” She asks curiously.
“I have, I am hoping to by the end of next summer, I just need to make sure the business plan is foolproof, find a space, blah blah! It will be a lot of work.”
“I can help, I am always looking to invest in small local businesses…” she trails off and raises her eyebrows.
“Aslaug, without wanting to sound ungrateful, because I really am grateful for the offer, I’ve got my heart set on doing it all by myself.” You give a determined look.
“Although, if you know anyone in real estate that can give me a heads up of any suitable spaces becoming available I will gladly take that help,” you give her a cheeky smile.
“It just so happens I do know some people who could help with that. I will get in touch with them,” she gives you a wink.
“Also, the jeweller who made the bracelet and necklace you bought could maybe use some help, she’s amazing but hasn’t managed to get herself a proper workshop. If you were interested? Her name is Sadie.” You hand Aslaug one of Sadies cards which she slips into her purse.
“You are a very determined young woman, Y/N. I can see why Ivar loves you so much. What time do you lock up the shop? We should go and get cocktails.”
“Yes! I bloody love a good cocktail, come back at 4pm?”
You think you might have finally cracked the cool exterior, Ivar will be so pleased and your heart swells.
—————
You wake up early on Christmas morning and throw on an oversized hoody, before Ivar is stirring and you grab the heavy present on the kitchen counter and head to the elevator.
It opens on the ground floor and you head in over to the reception desk.
“Preston, Happy Christmas!” You shout and laugh as he jumps out of his skin. You hand him over the present.
“What’s this?” He looks in disbelief.
“A pressie, open it!” You are so excited.
He opens the present to see a state of the art coffee machine and his face lights up.
“What? Why? You shouldn’t have done this, Y/N.” His face is tinged with annoyance.
“Oh shush, you always look knackered, we thought you could use it,” you retort.
“Wow, thanks so much, I don’t know what to say.“ He holds his hands up.
“Just a gesture for putting up with Ivar’s rude ass for all these years! Are you going home to your family soon?”
“He’s not so rude anymore.” He tells you with a wink “I finish in 30 minutes,” he says happily. “Happy Christmas, Y/N, thank you.”
“Happy Christmas, have a great day. Hope the twins are happy with their bikes.” You give him a quick hug then head towards the elevator.
When it dings and the door opens Ivar is standing, with his arm above his head looking at the floor and his eyes travel up you until reaching your face and creasing with laughter.
“Will that never get old?!” You ask him in fake annoyance, he knows you find it adorable.
“Happy Christmas, baby! Did Preston like his present?” He asks, pulling you in for a big kiss.
“Yep, he was very happy,” you bury your face in his neck.
“Do you want your present?” Ivar asks with a cheeky smile on his face.
“Is it an orgasm?” You ask, raising an eyebrow.
“Later,” he laughs out, “come on, it’s in the bedroom.”
“This is getting more interesting..” he looks back with a withering look.
“Get your mind out of my pants, filthy girl,” he wags a finger at you.
“Can I give you my present first? I’m so excited!” He laughs at you and nods.
You run to your side of the bed and pull out an envelope, skipping to him to hand it over. He opens the envelope and reads the Christmas card inside, smiling. He opens the card and two pieces of paper fall out. He picks them up with a furrowed brow, reading the words on them.
“Wha..what is this? Japan? You bought us tickets to travel to Japan?!” Pure disbelief on his face. He keeps looking back at the tickets and to you, clearly having trouble processing the information in front of him.
“What the fuck? This is too much, Y/N! We said small gifts.” His face is shocked.
“Meh, you are worth it. Are you ok? Do you want to go? I thought we could go and try some authentic sushi? Remember when I first came here?” You are searching his face for any sign of happiness.
“Y/N, this is too much. You can’t afford this.” His face still shows nothing but shock.
“I can baby, I wouldn’t have bought them if I couldn’t afford it, you know that. The shop has been doing amazing. Do you not want to go?” Your voice is small and dejected.
“Are you kidding me? It’s my number one place I want to visit! Oh my god I’m so excited, I'm just in shock, baby. Thank you! Thank you so much. I’ve never had a gift like this before.” He pulls you in for a crushing hug, kissing you all over your face and neck until you are swatting him away.
“Do you want to open your gift?” He asks excitedly.
He walks to his drawers and pulls out a big black box with a giant gold ribbon tied in bow. He hands it to you and sits close to you, watching your face intently as you undo the bow. You lift the lid on the black box and pull out a red box that you recognise. It’s one of Sadies.
You look at him and his face is so earnest you give him a kiss.
“Open it,” he urges you.
You open the box and inside is the most beautiful necklace you’ve ever seen. It has three platinum chain mail chains twisted round each other all joined together with a diamond on each clasp. It has a round platinum pendant on it, around the edge there is an engraving and in the middle is a beautiful, green stone.
“Ivar……” you look up at him, your eyes misting up.
“I need to explain it!” He is like an excited puppy.
“I designed it, with a little help from Sadie. It’s platinum and diamonds on the clasps..” the look on his face is one of pure amusement, you can’t help but laugh at him despite wanting to act offended, a clear call back to the unwanted bracelet he gave you.
“The circle of the pendant represents my never ending love for you,” his face changes from amusement to seriousness.
“The engraving is the date I first laid eyes on you.” You bring it closer to your face to read it.
“The date of the merger party.” You tell him, with a big soppy smile on your face.
“And the green sapphire in the middle is the exact colour of the blazer you were wearing when we met. I knew from that very moment you were the one for me. Forever and always.”
You don't know what to say, your eyes well up with tears.
“Do you like it, Y/N?” He asks nervously.
“It’s the most beautiful, thoughtful present. I love it.” You wipe your tears of happiness and kiss him. “You can't tell me off for the gift I got you, this must have cost a fortune, Ivar,” he just shrugs and grins.
“I left a space on it for another engraving. I am going to get it engraved with the date I ask you to be my wife.” his voice is smaller than before and his face is red with a blush. You gasp at his words and pull him close for a cuddle.
“Just for future reference, I will say yes.
THE END - thanks for reading :)
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shadowfoxsilver · 2 years
Text
Donation Scams
Over the years, several users have popped up out of nowhere claiming they need mutual aid. Now generally, for the most part, those who are asking for aid usually are legitimate users. Unfortunately, recently, some who are sending asks for aid are actually scammers using randomly generated blog names and posing as someone who needs aid while stealing the information from those who really need help. They will even go so far as stealing the info from someone who may have passed away recently with little care to what happens from theft.
I am not saying all users needing aid are scammers; Rather, there are those who are mixed in with the real users and making it difficult to find them by yourself. I will attempt to explain how these scams work as best as I can with examples given.
tl:dr - Scammers are stealing info from legit donation posts from numerous places and currently spamming asks to reblog their scam posts or making up stories in asks telling you to reblog their posts. Searching their username will generally reveal they stole info.
Please share if you'd like. I'm not a popular blog, and sadly some popular blogs have fell for these scams. All I ask is that you remain civil, I am aware most people will already know how to spot scams but this is for those who haven't yet learned how to.
So how do these scams work? A person will join this site with a random username that's clearly been auto-generated and then go about editing their profile to fit whatever they chose to scam by. This may be targeting LGBTQA+, natural disasters that are still being recovered from, other minorities, or fandom related. Regardless of the case, they will copy/paste blog headers from someone else and edit their blog info to anything relevant to what they decided to use for the most part. Once that's done, they'll start searching tags.
These tags they search may also be relevant to their scam, or random posts they'll group together to look somewhat relevant. Usually a fandom tag, a tag for cool things, or a tag for an animal of sorts and generally just any tag that will also be used to look legit. Once they have chosen a tag, they will reblog about 20 posts from the tag but it's usually in the span of several minutes all at once. They will not tag these reblogs, and may occasionally reblog a few days later.
After this, they'll make a donation post. They'll add images to this post that may be sensitive, use words that are guilt tripping towards the reader, or steal the story someone else had when they had coped the post. Usually, though, the story they tell is just copy/pasted from wherever they stole the pics from. Generally speaking, they are from facebook/gofundme/etc and edited enough you may not easily locate the sources. After they make the main post, they'll add a paypal in the post as well that isn't the paypal that would have originally been in the post. At times, the original post did not have paypal listed! Sometimes, though, a different funding site is listed that isn't one very well known.
Afterwards, the scam blog will then start sending asks to reblog their pinned post, which is the donation post. The ask may tell someone to answer privately, an effort to obscure the ask from those who are searching it in tumblr search. They will send these asks out all at once to random users, many who will reblog the post without much attention to it's contents. However, some will take notice of this blog and search it's contents to find out it's rather new. Generally, these blogs are a few days old with no other posts.
Once called out, the scammer will then start to block anyone whose reblogged their posts saying their a scam. They'll also hide any reblogs so it won't show up in the notes.
Examples of scam blogs, sourced from my scam busting blog:
Link Link Link LInk
So please, do your research if you get an ask that asks you to reblog a pinned post. Check to see how old the blog is, how many posts they made, and if the ask was sent to several other users. It's also good to search the paypal name for any existing alerts.
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prettygirlmjmjmj · 6 months
Note
Hi! I'm Maggie, I just wanted to ask, do you have any tips for starting a coquette blog? I'm new to Tumblr and really want to start posting. Love you, have a nice day! 🩷
Hi Maggie! Thank you for asking me I would of course love to help. Having a Tumblr blog is such a fun way to share your interests with others and find people who feel/think the same way as you. Coquette blogs are some of my favourites so I hope you find these tips useful:
Starting a blog, tips
Try to have a direction you want your blog to head in. For example questions to ask yourself are, what kind of audience are you trying to reach? What are your main intentions for your blog? Do you want to have posts that have the same theme or ideas, or completely different posts? Once you figure out the direction, starting becomes so much easier!
Try to make your blog look visually appealing to you and your posts cohesive. Whenever I start decorating/customising a post, I always consider my overall theme (mainly pink, of course) and try to go from there. Add cute images and fonts that you love or emojis and symbols to help your blog stand out and make you happy when you look at it.
Browse the tags you plan on using under your posts for inspiration. I don't mean steal someone's ideas or posts, I mean look at what's popular under the tag or currently appealing to you and start planning your posts from there.
Think about your interests and likes. Making a post about something you actually find interesting always comes through to the people reading it. Instead of focusing on the number of people who interact with the post, try to make posts you genuinely love and would read. Growth doesn't happen overnight but by being genuine and yourself it'll be easier to find a community.
Try to mix up the kind of posts you make. While I love making lengthy posts they can be so incredibly time consuming, that sometimes I need a little break. Make shorter posts as well, even if it's just sharing a picture you loved or a recipe you tried, mixing up your posts will appeal to more groups of people and stop you from feeling drained by Tumblr and your blog.
Be consistent! Posting regularly (I aim for once to twice a week) and even continuing to check in with your followers and interactions on your posts helps you to be consistent and engaged with your blog.
Follow creators who's blogs you admire or posts you love. Seeing their posts on your homepage will motivate you for your own blog and help to give you ideas and inspiration where there might not be any.
Try to thoroughly research and understand your posts before you make them. Understanding something properly will help you to articulate fully and write everything you wanted to say in the post and mean that you feel confident talking about what you're posting.
Figure out what sets you apart from other blogs out there. Is it your creativity? Your knowledge of the topic? Your humour? Whatever it is find it and try to cultivate it, people love seeing blogs that stand out and are far more likely to interact with interesting posts and blogs.
Finally, look up online, in a book or anywhere else for post inspiration if you are struggling ideas-wise. Both have many brilliant resources, but I am especially partial to Pinterest because I normally see pretty images too. If you find inspiration use it or save it and start thinking about how you could fit the post to the theme of your blog.
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Thank you! I hope this is super helpful and good luck. All my love, mj.
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batrachised · 9 months
Note
I'm rereading Emily's Quest and Ilse/Perry's romantic resolution is hands down one of my favorite parts of the whole entire series, what are your thoughts on them together and the complicated love square between Emily, Teddy, Ilse and Perry?
you can't see it, but I'm throwing back my head and laughing maniacally, for o poor innocent anon - I do not know if you are aware and you might be, but this discussion happened several months ago and I learned (while having the time of my life) that people have strong and conflicting opinions on Emily of New Moon. Never have my lm montgomery posts gotten so much traction. I'm more than happy to talk about my thoughts here, but if you're looking for more, I suggest searching the emily of new moon tag on tumblr or on my blog. (Poor Teddy did not fare well, let's just say that).
Ilse and Perry's relationship is a really sharp contrast to Emily's and Teddy's to me tonally. Although this isn't necessarily reflected on the individual level, I feel like Ilse and Perry's is defined by this activeness/aggression, and Emily's and Teddy's is defined by this passiveness. Ilse and Perry get into fights; Teddy and Emily ignore each other for years. Ilse verbally attacks Perry to his face because she's too proud to admit she loves him; Emily ignores Teddy's whistle and ices him out. This doesn't necessarily trickle down to the character level (I would not describe Emily Byrd Starr as a passive and quiet person lol), but squinting at the relationships, these are overall impressions.
In this neapolitan ice cream mix of personalities, you get so many different combos. (Ilse/Perry, Ilse/Teddy, Emily/Perry (he wishes)..the list goes on). I love how you describe it as a love square, because it really only stops short of Ilse and Emily dating each other, and even then, their friendship plays just as a significant a role as the actual romantic relationships. It would be as if in Anne, Phil did decide to go for Gilbert because well, Anne has repeatedly said she's not interested. That would layer their relationship in an entirely different way, and that's what happens with Emily and Ilse. It would also give us a different impression of Gilbert, choosing to date one of Anne's best friend after expressing romantic interest in Anne repeatedly.
I think the love square kind of fits Emily's tone as a whole - Emily's books don't have the innocence - or perhaps a better word is earnestness - that Anne's do. That friend group is messy. Ilse knows Emily likes Teddy but goes around with Teddy, Emily knows Ilse likes Perry but Perry is in love with her, Teddy is in love with Emily but still choose to date Ilse...it's less a square and more a three dimensional rhombus that's caving in on itself. (floating somewhere in this stew of hormones is dean too, to make matters all the more complicated)
As for each individual couple - your ask didn't ask this, and it's already been discussed at length (see first paragraph) so I'll limit my thoughts on Teddy and Emily as It Would Have Been Nice if Teddy Talked, At Least Sometimes. We barely see them interact, and it weakens the pairing in my eyes considerably.
All the more because we have this passive conflict right next to Ilse's and Perry's very active one, although that's usually seen at a narrative distance (ie through Emily referencing it in her diary). I think Ilse's and Perry's romantic resolution suits them very well - Ilse is someone who has had free reign to do what she wants her entire life, who was neglected then spoiled rotten, and who is temperamental to say the least. Her leaving Teddy at the altar to flee to Perry's bedside is completely in character for her, along with her needing a wake-up call on the level of death haha. It's suitably dramatic and over the top for someone who is very dramatic. It also neatly embarrasses Teddy, who, if my memory serves, needed some emotional walloping at that point as well.
The thing about Ilse and Perry though, is that almost all of their interactions happen offscreen. Their fights, reunion, and married life all happen off screen. In fact, both the 'endgame' couples are marked by this. You get more interaction between Perry and Emily than Perry and Emily, and really, it almost feels like you get more interaction between Teddy and Ilse than Emily and Teddy. I love the Emily books, but they do leaving me wanting more in that respect, especially because these characters are so compelling. I want to read the scene where Perry who is half conked out in bed sees Ilse in all her bridal glory crash through his hospital room door! I want to read more than the 1-2 conversations we get between Emily and Teddy! It's interesting, though, because a lot of what we do see is narrated by Emily in her diary; in a way, Emily is telling her own story to us as she sees fit.
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rockyroadkylers · 4 months
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2023 Writing Roundup
@hgejfmw-hgejhsf tagged me to do this, and @inexplicablymine actually did, too, a while back, so here we go!
i haven't written much this year- well, no, okay, that's a lie, in terms of word count i've written quite a lot, but in terms of how many fics i've posted, i don't have that many to share, here. but i'm pretty dang proud of what i do have!
May
I Will Soften Every Edge (I'll Do Better) - MCU, 6.6k, T
Tony Stark is unexpectedly thrust into parenthood when he discovers that Spider-Man is not only fourteen years old, but also his son. He's unsure how to proceed from there, until the Vulture destroys a ferry full of people and Tony learns something about his son that makes him reevaluate his own behavior. Gift for hold_our_destiny from my Fic Raffle on Tumblr.
October
It's Nice to Have a Friend - RWRB, 59k, 11 chapters, T
Two boys meet on a beach, build a sand castle, write letters, and fall in love.
November
After Everything, I Must Confess I Need You - RWRB, 5.8k, T
“Fuck,” he gasps, tears springing to his eyes and mixing with the rainwater on his face. He’s not sure if the tears are from the asphalt biting into his palms, or if it’s a release of the emotions he’s been trying to shove down deep ever since he woke up to an empty top bunk at the lake house. Wait. Asphalt. Over the pounding rain, Alex hears the shrill sound of a horn honking, and looks up just in time to be blinded by a pair of headlights coming straight at him. OR: When Alex dares Henry to tell him to leave, Henry actually does. Neither of them could have predicted what happens next.
Upcoming in 2024:
i picked the petals, he loves me not
canon divergence starting from the day Alex and Henry met in Rio, following an AU where Alex develops Hanahaki Disease from Henry asking Shaan to get rid of him.
currently untitled sequel to It's Nice to Have a Friend
Picking up where chapter ten left off (Alex and Henry finally getting together), the sequel will follow the boys as they navigate their new relationship through the ups and downs of long distance, therapy, school, and Ellen's 2016 presidential campaign.
This Love is Worth the Fight
a surprisingly highly-requested sequel to After Everything, I Must Confess I Need You. It will likely be another longfic, due to the amount of ideas I've made notes of, but I don't have anything concrete, yet.
1/124th of a second (credit to Beas for the genius title)
Actor!Henry, Photographer!Alex AU. Sort of an enemies to lovers premise. I won't actually be able to write this one until Mary and George comes out, I don't think, because the premise of it is Alex taking a job as the photographer taking pictures of Henry to promote his role as George Villiers in Mary and George, and he watches the show to prepare for the job, so I might need to be able to actually reference some of the scenes in order to write about Alex watching the show, lol. Other than that, this fic is entirely outlined, so it should be easy to write... once I have access to clips of the show for reference, pfft.
this has been fun to do! so much of the writing i've done this year has taken place over the last four months, that sometimes i forget i did any writing before the month of September 😂 but i did! and it's good writing, too, as hard as that is for me to remember, sometimes.
tagging: @matherines, @firenati0n, @affectionatelyrs, @anincompletelist, @littlemisskittentoes, @read-and-write-, @happiness-of-the-pursuit, @songliili, @wordsofhoneydew
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tangledfate · 1 month
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GET TO KNOW THE MUN !
🕷 || NAME?: Friday
🕷 || PRONOUNS?: she/they
🕷 || MOST ACTIVE MUSE(S)?:  Angel Dust and Sallie May are currently fighting over the wheel while Stella, Lucifer and Husk are panicking in the back seat and everyone else is in the trunk.
🕷 || RP PET PEEVES?:  Besides the obvious of godmodding/powerplay/underwriting? Probably not giving me enough to work with for replying. I don't need you to match my length but give me more than a sentence or two. Tell me what your muse is thinking, what they're feeling, what's happening around them. Give me something to work off of or it gets boring fast. Sorry.
🕷 || EXPERIENCE / HOW MANY YEARS?: I have been roleplaying on tumblr since 2009, I have been roleplaying in general since 2003-2004ish, started with my twin @defiedfate and just kinda ran from there.
🕷 || FLUFF, ANGST, OR SMUT?:  I write a mix of all of them. My most popular/successful threads have always contained some balance between the three. And that's usually how it goes because all three are required to make a good story in my opinion.
🕷 || PLOTS OR MEMES?: While I don't mind either as they both can lead to great things, I tend to be faster when it comes to plotted things and that's mostly because I forget my inbox is there. I don't always have the spoons to do asks just because they are a lot of effort on my end to make up a story for both sides of the equation where as with replies I only have to worry about my own character.
🕷 || LONG OR SHORT REPLIES?:  While I don't usually do especially short responses because I don't have icons (I have somewhere around 75 muses on this blog and don't have the patience to make icons for all of them), my responses can range anywhere from 2 to 10+ paragraphs depending on what I am feeling for the thread and how wordy I get.
🕷 || TIME TO WRITE?:  I currently have nothing going on so I am pretty much here all day. This is actually set to change sometime in the next 2 weeks as I will be starting a new job but as I am expected to work mornings, I will have afternoons to play and will likely be doing some of my best work somewhere between post work clarity and collapsing into bed to sleep.
🕷 || ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S)?: I like to think that everyone's muses have aspects of themselves in them, that's why they play them so well. The best muses are the ones that have a piece of the mun embedded in them. So I probably have something in common with all of my muses but as to what exactly those traits might be, your guess is as good as mine. Besides trauma...I got that in spades unfortunately...
tagged by ; @daddymothxxx & @voxtekoverlord
tagging ; @defiedfate, @infernalight, @diresang, @madefate, @fizzarollitm, @jizzlords, & anyone else who wants to do it :)
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hardly-an-escape · 3 months
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man... I'm seeing the recency bias in fanfic firsthand this weekend and I'm having mixed feelings about it. putting it under a cut because it's rambly and long.
I don't track my kudos as closely as some folks do, but I've noticed that the AO3 emails have been slowing down lately. which makes sense, as the last time I posted there was in October and I haven't been super active on tumblr lately either.
but I posed a fic yesterday and almost immediately started getting kudos on other works of mine as well – and it's super obvious why, of course: people who enjoyed the fic I'd just posted clicked on my profile to see what else I've written, and checked out my other, older fics. same thing actually happened to a lesser extent here on tumblr, with likes popping up on older posts, presumably because people found my fic masterlist via my pinned post (which includes things like ficlets that aren't on AO3, AU ideas, etc.)
on the one hand, this is awesome! this is exactly how an archive is supposed to function, after all, just like how you go to the C shelf at the library to find more books by Agatha Christie.
on the other, it's hard not to take that info and translate it into "I must continue to produce work so that my older work will get noticed, too." I must keep my name up there among the most recent posts, I must stay visible. or maybe I'm not doing a good job of self promotion; maybe I should try to circulate my own older fics more, maybe I should tag my stuff better, etc. etc.
of course this is only anxious internal pressure, and it's fairly easy to ignore. I'm not in fandom for clout or "engagement," I'm in it for fun. and that kind of thinking is the opposite of fun, so I try not to give in to it. but it's hard sometimes. I mean, I want people to read what I write, and enjoy it, and react to it. I get a lot of satisfaction and validation from others' reactions to my writing, and I'm not going to pretend that that isn't part of the reason why I post my fic!
but I'm also a slow writer, and not very prolific when it comes down to it (for a lot of reasons, ranging from ADHD to a busy real life to my mental health). and it does bum me out a little when there's such a clear difference between the number of reactions I get to my work when I've posted something recently vs when it's been a couple of months since I shared something new. the joy of getting that attention is tempered by this bittersweet, "wow... I could get that feeling even more often if I was just... better." if I wrote faster. if I posted more.
but it also drives home how important it is to circulate posts and older fics! to go past that first page on AO3, to really dive into the tags for fandoms or pairings you love and seek out some older stuff. it drives home the importance of things like rec lists and masterlists, which enable us to collect and share works that may have fallen out of view.
(and yes, it drives home for me personally that I can always be doing more to lift up my fellow writers, to reblog and comment on things I like, so everyone can get that good feeling of knowing someone enjoyed something they wrote.)
anyway. lots of thoughts and feelings over here. and I want to be clear that this is all my own personal stuff – please don't take any of this as judgement or criticism of how anyone else engages in fandom. just barfing my thoughts into the void.
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falcqns · 2 years
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𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐬: 𝐟𝐮𝐫𝐛𝐲
✰ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Chris Evans x younger!mute!Reader
✰ 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: Sometimes Chris isn't the best at helping you experience a childhood.
✰ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: age gap, furby, crying, trauma response, reader gets violent with chris but it's because of trauma, Lisa Evans being a great mom, mentions of sexual assault, mentions of CPS and foster care, kind of weird comment from chris at the end (he says he would have taken her in as a foster child if he could go back in time) but not too weird i hope??
✰ 𝐚/𝐧: tagging @natashasera
don't forget to read and reblog, and i do not give permission for my works to be posted anywhere other than tumblr. thank you.
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Chris chewed on his lip as he looked at the toy in front of him. While he wasn't young enough to play with Furby's when they came out, his younger sister had one, and he may or may not have been a little jealous of Shanna who had the stuffed robotic animal.
"Bubba!" Chris called out for you, as he was putting the groceries away. he smiled, hearing your feet running against the floor upstairs where you had been doing homework.
you ran up to him, and wrapped your arms around him giggling when he kissed your head. "how was dance?" he asked, seeing your hair still pinned back from your ballet class.
'good,' you signed, giggling again as he kissed your cheeks.
"that's good." he said, reaching behind him for the toy. "i got you something at the store," he explained and showed you the Furby in the box.
your head tilted in confusion when you saw the toy, but Chris filled in the blanks for you.
"it's an interactive toy that makes noises and moves," he said. "Shanna had one when we were younger, and I thought you'd like it," he reasoned. "here, let's go set him up." Chris said, pulling you over to the table.
you kneeled on the bench and watched as Chris opened the box and putting the batteries in. you leaned on the table, trying to get a closer peek of your new toy, when it started talking.
your body jumped into fight or flight, and you fell off of the bench backwards, whimpering. Chris's head shot up from where he was turning the animal on. the Furby continued to talk, and you pushed your self back from the table on your bum, a sob mixed with a scream ripping from your throat.
Chris shot up from the table, and rushed towards you, not realizing the toy was still in his hand. he tried to lift you up like he normally did when you were upset, but you scream-sobbed again, and pushed him away.
"what happened?" he asked, not knowing what triggered you, or why you were freaking out so badly. your previous 'meltdowns', you would just shut down, curl into a ball, and cry quietly. you never screamed, and you've never pushed him away. "what do you need me to do?" he asked, expecting you to gesture or to sign, but you just kept crying loudly.
Chris got closer, and tried again to lift you up, and managed to get a grip on you, when you started hitting and kicking him. he looked at you, wildly confused, but released you.
however, you didn't move, and gripped his right arm, the one holding the furby. you dug your nails into his arm, pushing it away and hitting his chest with your other hand.
Chris looked at his hand to see why you were pushing it away, and realized he was still holding the Furby. he then realized that the toy was what was causing your trauma response and he dropped it.
as soon as he dropped it from his hand, you stopped hitting him and released his arm, letting Chris wrap his arms around you. you let yourself be rocked back and forth as you continued to practically scream.
then, you spotted the offending toy on the floor, and started thrashing in Chris's grip, fighting to get your arm free.
"shhh," Chris tried to soothe, but you continued to thrash until your arm was out. you reached for the toy and picked it up, before raising your arm and going to throw it across the room.
"HEY!" Chris shouted, ripping it from your hand. "we don't throw things in the house!" he tried to say firmly, but it was clear that you weren't hearing any of it as you tried to rip it out of his hands. you managed to get it free, and threw it in the direction of the hallway, where it landed with a bang, the bottom popping off, and the batteries rolling out.
"enough," Chris said as you tried to pull up his shirt and climb under it. "no." he said firmly, removing his shirt from your grip. "stop." he said more firmly as you started pushing and hitting his chest trying to get away.
you screamed again, and Chris released you. you stood up, and took off through the door to the kitchen. Chris scrambled to his feet as you ran through the kitchen, and into the rest of the house, disappearing somewhere.
Chris sighed, running a hand through his hair, and down his face. you'd never freaked out that badly before, and you'd never, ever been violent. things had set you off before, but you'd never thrown things like that, and that scared him.
he walked into the hallway and picked up the now broken toy and the batteries before Dodger could get a hold of them, and stopped in the kitchen ti throw it in the garbage before going to find you.
he searched through the downstairs first. he checked the living room and his office, the laundry room, mud room, and the garage, but you weren't there. he then checked all the closets and bathrooms downstairs, but you weren't there either.
he glanced in the backyard briefly, but you never went out there alone, as you had a weird fear of the woods. he headed up the stairs, and poked his head in all the rooms, but didn't see you.
he sighed, concluding you were in your shared bedroom. he stopped in front of the door, and took a moment to himself to ensure that he was in the correct headspace and had the right tone for talking to you. you were very sensitive after a breakdown that bad, and he wanted to minimalize how much you'd cry.
"sweet girl?" he asked quietly, looking to see where you'd hidden yourself. you weren't under the covers or in the closet, you weren't under your desk or in the bathroom.
he felt panic grow in his chest, but he ignored it, knowing you had to be here somewhere. Nora and Faye were still in their bassinet beside the bed, so he knew you didn't leave the house. he exited the room, and decided to check the house again.
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Chris tried to regulate his breathing as he dialled his mom's number.
it was almost 2 hours later, and he hadn't found you. you weren't anywhere in his house, and he was beginning to freak out. he thought that because your dolls were still here, that you didn't leave, but when the realization that you most likely didn't think about taking your babies in your terror and need to escape hit him.
as soon as it did, he lost it. he'd thought you were gone, wandering down the highway, and the thought of you being alone while not in the right headspace, and while still healing from your past. he'd grabbed his phone, and dialled his moms number.
she answered on the third ring, her cheery, loving and warm voice on the other end of the line soothing him slightly.
"hey baby, whats up?" she said, and Chris swallowed the lump in his throat, blinking away the tears in his eyes.
"M-Ma," he stuttered. "she's gone-e."
he heard Lisa drop something on the other end of the phone before she spoke.
"who's gone?' she asked, worried. "who's gone, Chris? what are you talking about?"
"Y-Y/N," Chris cried, unable to hold back the tears any longer. "sh-she's gone. she's not in th-the house."
he listened as his mom started walking, and heard the sound of her keys rattling. "okay." she said, worry laced in her voice. "okay, i'm on my way. talk me through what happened." she said, the front door closing behind her.
"i-i got her a n-new toy, a Furby. l-like the one Shanna used to h-have?" he stuttered, pacing around the kitchen. "i-i was setting it up when-n something about the toy triggered her, and sh-she was having-g a meltdown. i-i-i tried to comfort her but she kept h-hitting me and kicking until i dro-pped it, and then she threw-w it across-s the room, breaking it-t. she t-took off after that and i haven't been able to f-find her-r." he cried as he heard his mom's car speeding down the street to his house.
"okay, i understand. i know you're scared, but i need you to try and calm down, okay? remember how we said that her seeing you so upset when she's upset can be good, but it can also be bad?" she said, and Chris nodded.
"y-yeah."
"good. can you tell me why?"
"b-because while it will help her-r un-derstand her em-motions and know-w that it's-s okay, it c-can make her-r feel g-guilty," Chris recited, having said it to himself and to his mom multiple times. your therapist had explained to him that while crying in front of you was good, and would let you know it was okay to express and feel your emotions, i could also cause harm due to the extreme gaslighting that ocurred in your childhood.
"good job." Lisa praised. "okay, i'm going to hang up now, i'm here." she said and Chris nodded again.
"o-okay," he said, and turned his phone off when the line went dead. he heard the front door open, and his mom came running through the house.
she came running up to Chris, and wrapped her arms around him. "shhhh," she soothed, letting her son cry into her shirt. "she's okay, we'll find her. she's here somewhere, she's just a good little hider."
Lisa pulled back, and cupped Chris's cheeks. "sit down, and take a few minutes to calm down, okay?" she said. "i'll go look for her. it's going to be okay, okay?" Chris just nodded again, and sat down on the couch as his mom exited the living room, peaking her head in each room, but not seeing or hearing you.
she made her way up the stairs, listening intently for you. a smile broke out on her face when she saw Dodger curled up outside yours and Chris's bedroom.
"oh, i love that boy." she said to herself, shaking her head with a laugh. "he's so sweet but so blind," she said as she opened the door. she stood in the doorway for a moment, listening intently.
she smiled again when she heard something move, and a sniffle come from under the bed.
Lisa approached the bed, and kneeled beside it, peeking underneath.
"hey baby," she whispered, seeing you curled up in the smallest ball you could, silently crying. "there you are,"
you opened your eyes when you heard her voice, and she cooed when she saw your chin wobble. she sat down, her back resting against the bedside table. she reached her hand underneath the bed, offering it to you. "come here," she whispered. "let Ma give you a hug."
you moved after a moment, and crawled out of under the bed. Lisa grabbed onto your hand, and helped you crawl closer to her, small whimpers escaping your mouth as you cuddled into Lisa.
she started rocking you back and forth, one of her hands rubbing your back. she heard you start crying again, and soothed you.
"shhh," she whispered. "it's okay. you're okay." you lifted your hand, and signed 'sorry', which made Lisa shake her head.
"no, sweetheart. you have nothing to apologize for. you had a horrific childhood, and somethings upset you, and that's okay." you nodded, your hand rubbing your eyes.
"Dodger," Lisa called out, and the dog came running up, sitting down in front of her, tilting his head to the left. "go get your dad," she said, and Dodger took off, bounding down the stairs. she heard him bark a few times, and take off again, this time running back to her.
he bounded in the room, and skidded to a stop, sitting down next to you and Lisa, licking your cheek. Lisa scratched his head, making the puppy smile big.
"good boy," she said as Chris entered the room.
as soon as Chris's eyes landed on you, he sighed a breath of relief, and kneeled in front of the two of you. "w-where was she?" Chris asked, as Lisa sat up, helping transfer you over to Chris.
"Chris, honey, you've gotta check under things as well." she said, amused. "i've only been saying it your whole life."
Chris sniffled as you cuddled up into his embrace, your eyes fluttering closed. "i-i don't even know why it set her off." Chris said.
"did you tell her it talked?" Lisa asked, still petting Dodger.
Chris thought back to when he explained what the Furby did. he squeezed his eyes shut. "fuck." he said. "no, i didn't. i said it makes noises and moves."
Lisa nodded. "okay." she said. "she was probably startled when it started talking to her. but that doesn't explain the violence and the running away," Lisa thought out loud, and Chris opened his eyes.
he looked down at you before speaking. "can you get her CPS file? it's in my office on my desk." he said, and Lisa nodded, before getting up and going to retrieve it.
while she was gone, Chris pressed kisses to your head. "'m so sorry, babygirl." he said. "i-i didn't even think to check your file," he said, as his mom came back in the room, the file in hand.
Chris took it from his mom with a thanks, and began to flip through it, with Lisa looking over his shoulder. Chris groaned when he found what he was looking for.
"i'm a fucking idiot." he said, passing the file to his mom.
Lisa looked down, and read what Chris pointed to.
'...small camera was found in her room, and it was revealed that the male adult in the home [redacted] was watching her through the camera hidden in the animal, and would speak to her using the microphone. suspected sexual abuse.'
"oh my god." Lisa stuttered, pushing the file away from her, and scooted closer to you, placing a hand on your head, kissing your forehead. "you poor girl," she whispered.
"i should have known." Chris said, a tear falling down his cheek. "i've read her file a thousand times, and i should have known that it would set her off-" Chris started to ramble, but Lisa cut him off.
"no, don't do that to yourself." Lisa said, looking up at her son. "it was an accident, and now we know the cause, and we know how to avoid it in the future. she'll be okay now." Lisa said, and Chris released a shaky breath.
"i hate that she went through that." Chris said, his voice shaky. "she was relocated to boston a few years after being taken by CPS." he said. "if i could go back in time, i'd take her in myself so she wouldn't have had to go through that. she was just a child."
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sacredflorist · 1 month
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Get to know the mun
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What made you pick the current muse(s) you have ? I always like to say the muse chooses, I don't choose them 😂 But of course, I always write characters I love! If we're speaking about Aerith's case, I wrote her for a few years and I had a lot of fun, and I felt like writing her again. She's such an interesting character to explore because she's very complex :3
Is there anything you don't like to write ? I don't write smut ? This is the first thing that comes to my mind, but also extreme violence or physical abuses. It's not my cup of tea at all!
Is there anything you really enjoy writing ? Everything that allows me to deepen my character! Very strong feelings, for example. Anger, sadness, love... anything thing, but when they feel strongly, it's always very interesting to write! And I also love to explore parts of the canon that was briefly mentioned but not shown, for example.
How do you come up with headcanons ? It's very random, actually 😂 Sometimes, it's because I'm playing the game and it makes me think of something, sometimes it's because of something that happens in a thread, sometimes it starts with discussing with irl or rp friends... it really depends!
Do you write in silence or do you play music ? I mostly listen to music because I think it's relaxing and it allows me to concentrate, even if sometimes I'm too passionate about the songs I'm listening to 😂 I like to make playlist for my character, too! It's always interesting, and I love listening to my mixes on Spotify, too, depending on the mood of the thread.
Do you plan your replies or wing them ? I mostly wing them, but sometimes when I read someone reply, I might have an idea right away so I note it in the drafts. It doesn't mean I'll keep it in the end, but I often do.
Do you enjoy shipping ? I do, but I prefer to ship with people I talk with ooc at least a bit. It really is just for my own comfort, nothing personal haha! And I prefer to have a small number of romantic ships because I love to explore different kinds of dynamic. I'm open to it though of course, and I absolutely adore my ships :3 I like when they come naturally through interactions, these are the best kind 🥰
What's your aliase/name ? Sam
Age ? 28 but 29 very soon 😂
Birthday ? In late March hehe!
Favorite color(s) ? Red ❤
Favorite song(s) ? It's very hard to pîck one! But I'm a Swiftie so I'll go with a Taylor Swift song! These days I'd say it's "my tears ricochet" 🥺
Last movie you watched ? I'm pretty sure it's The Eras Tour when it was released on Disney plus! I saw it before but I needed to watch it again, and that full version haha :3
Last show you watched ? I did a Cardcaptor Sakura rewatch for the first time in so many years LOL
Last song you listened to ? "Watermelon Sugar" by Harry Styles
Favorite food ? I'm a seafood girl! Anything with seafood, and sushi too! These always make me happy!
Favorite season ? Summer! When it's warm and comfortable in the evening, not when it's humid though 😂 Swimming late in the evening is the best though!
Do you have a Tumblr best friend ? I do and I'm vey grateful. I don't think I need to name them, they know who they are ❤
Tagged by: @origami-assassin, thank you 😊 Tagging: YOU ;D
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imabillyami · 2 months
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“Billy, where the fuck have you been lately?”
I’ve been mostly trying to get my personal life back on track. I’ll be celebrating 2 years drug/alcohol free on April 1st and to honor that, I wanted to get things a bit more in order again.
The results are mixed, but I’m working on it.
I’ve really been enjoying my time away from Wrestling and Tumblr lately, only really talking to my friends and people I’m developing great friendships with on discord and irl lately.
The break from Wrestling (outside of the occasional nxt episode and PLEs) is much needed for me, cause I do not enjoy main roster WWE writing at all lately.
I don’t wanna ruin it for the people enjoying it though and I especially don’t wanna have discussions with strangers on the internet about it. If I wanna bitch about something, I’ll do so in private, except for when I have *moments* and end up bitching online anyway. But those are very rare and far inbetween.
Everyone can do with their internet presence what they want, it’s not my place to judge or tell anyone what to do. I personally just don’t wanna expose myself to the level of negativity the fandom sometimes exudes.
And I’m not dealing with stupid unnecessary hate messages either or childish indirecting either. Been there, dealt with that, and I’m personally way past the point where I’m willing to give it any time of my day.
I wanna be a positive online presence, with strong opinions still, yes. But that doesn’t mean I can’t be kind about them and respect other opinions.
Anyway, I’m rambling.
Spring is finally coming, the sun finally made a big return, so I’m trying to soak up as much Vitamin D as I possibly can while chatting with the people who are very dear to me.
If you want to add me on discord, just message me here first, I’ll be super happy to talk to you over there and maybe even strike up a friendship if we click with each other.
As for my fic writing: It’s slow. I’m still writing for the Samijey fandom and I still love doing it, but staying on top of my life and chatting to/ taking care of friends has been the priority for me these past few weeks. Writing is still going though, just gotta be patient about it.
I’m not putting pressure on myself to publish anymore, cause that sucks the joy right out of it. I love sharing my writing with all of you and I love your feedback, but it’s not meant to be the reason I write. At least not the main one. I’m writing for my own enjoyment and as a creative release first and foremost and that’s how it’s supposed to be, at least in my case.
So yeah. Sunshine, hard work staying on top of things, friendship and support have been my main focus lately and I’m actually quite happy with that.
I’ll be back more frequently and be more active in the fandom again once I see something I enjoy being shown on tv, until then, feel free to reach out about the discord thing and please never stop tagging me in posts on this silly website, I love coming back and catching up with what y’all have been up to!
For now, hugs and kisses to y’all.
(I’ll be lurking around lmao)
p.s.: I was made aware that there apparently was a whole ass hate campaign against me happening in private messages. If you listened to that and chose to believe it, you missed out on talking to me and that’s honestly your loss. I was not aware of having beef or animosity with anyone around here is all I can say to that 🤷 Spread love like legs ✌️
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helena-thompson · 1 year
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MAGIC Summary: Helena and Sebastian make out. Pairing: Sebastian Sallow x Female MC Words: 715 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences  Tags / Warnings: Kissing, Oneshot, Canon Compliant, POV Third Person, Romance  
No one had ever kissed Helena the way Sebastian did. She kissed a boy here and there before she ever came to Hogwarts—little, innocent kisses, with barely any tongue involved. She experimented a bit more when she briefly courted Eric Northcott. She got used to the feeling of hands on her body and a tongue in her mouth. Helena would admit it was… nice. But Eric had never kissed her like this.
Read on: AO3 | Wattpad | Tumblr (continue below)
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I just randomly started thinking about these two making out and then this happened, okay?
Background info: Helena briefly dates Eric Northcott, literally only because she’s got a crush on Sebastian and she thinks he doesn’t have a chance because he’s off fooling around with random girls (he’s got issues) and she wants to try to get over him. I’ve got a whole post on how they end up together here: https://helena-thompson.tumblr.com/post/714050177335492608/i-have-to-make-my-obligatory-how-helena
More info about Helena (description, info on her and Sebastian, timeline, etc.) & a comprehensive list of all fics featuring her can be found on her character website: https://sites.google.com/view/helena-thompson/home
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No one had ever kissed Helena the way Sebastian did.
She kissed a boy here and there before she ever came to Hogwarts—little, innocent kisses, with barely any tongue involved.
She experimented a bit more when she briefly courted Eric Northcott. She got used to the feeling of hands on her body and a tongue in her mouth. Helena would admit it was… nice.
But Eric had never kissed her like this.
Sebastian kissed her like he was a man starved, and she was the first meal he had in days—in weeks. His lips were so soft, and he knew exactly how to move them against hers… and he knew what to do with his tongue, too. Helena hated the fact that he was so well versed because he had so much practice with other girls, but at the same time, it was amazing, because he was just so good at it.
Sebastian practically drew the air from her lungs, suffocating her in the best way, had her going dizzy from him and his lips. He cradled her head in his hand, angled it to deepen their kiss as he pleased, taking what he wanted from her. Helena couldn’t help the little sounds he coaxed from her with a brush of his fingers over a sliver of exposed skin, a twist of his tongue just so against her own, or a press of his lips against the sensitive skin of her neck. 
His scent engulfed her, the aroma of burning embers, old books, and that scent that was distinctly Sebastian mixed with the fragrance from the soap used in the Slytherin common room baths. It was like smelling that bloody amortentia potion all over again, except now, it was intoxicating. 
His teeth grazed over her neck, his tongue following, before he sucked at her skin, marking her, claiming her. He would no doubt give her that stupidly satisfied smirk afterwards when he admired his handiwork, always left in a spot that was just barely visible from under the collar of her uniform, where everyone and anyone could see what he’d done. 
Sebastian liked to hold her close, delightfully so, usually pressed between himself and something else—a sofa, the wall of the Undercroft, a secret alcove in the halls between classes—and he held her possessively, his fingers digging into her. It was almost as if his damned hands burned through her layers of clothing as he touched her. Their legs were practically tangled together, and when he moved just so—and when she had half a mind to realize—she sometimes felt that she wasn’t the only one who was so affected by their actions.  
But Helena was becoming more adventurous, more bold in their escapades, mostly because of the way Sebastian drove her insane and she needed more. 
She loved the deep little throaty sounds he made when she curled her fingers at his scalp at the nape of his neck, loved the way it sent shivers down her spine. She started grabbing fistfuls of his hair, holding him where she wanted, taking from his mouth as he took from hers, and she was rewarded with even more lovely sounds that sent tingles even lower than her spine.
If she was lucky, she managed to slither her hands under his jacket and vest to trace over his back through the thin cotton of his shirt. Perhaps most brazen thing Helena did, though, in her desire for more of him, was sliding her leg up Sebastian’s and hooking it around his thigh. Without hesitation, he grabbed her, securing her leg around his waist as he settled even closer to her, and she could feel the rumble of his moan in his chest as he pressed it against hers.
Merlin help her, it was both too much and not enough at the same time.
They finally parted to breathe, Sebastian’s forehead resting upon her own. Helena could feel his breath on her face as they both gasped and gulped for air, and as she stared up into his beautiful, brown eyes, only one thing crossed her mind.
No one had ever kissed Helena the way Sebastian did… and it might have been the most magical thing she’d come across since arriving at Hogwarts. 
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