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lincolndjarin · 9 months

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Best Kept Secret ☆

A MANDALORIAN SERIES MASTERLIST

[ COMPLETED ]

✩ a bodyguard!din x princess!reader fic ✩

series summary :

Married off to a prince on a planet that you hate? New husband doesn't know you, and doesn't want to know you? New husband gifts you a personal Mandalorian body guard as a wedding present? Mandalorian is a wiseass who won't leave you alone? Lucky you.

18+ mdni

do you like kitschy, campy romance novels? if you're reading this, I hope so.

behind the scenes & chapter notes + other extras (spoilers) :

chapters 1-5

chapter 6-15

spotify playlists

Lysa & Elaine information

the bks screen adaption

bks q&a

bks what if's

reader is generally not described past being picked up a few times, and having hair long enough to be put up

✩ chapters containing smut!

chapter one : honeymoon (6.7k words)

[ Absurd.

That is the only word that comes to mind as you stare at yourself in the mirror. “His favorite color is blue.” ]

chapter two : silent treatment (7.4k words)

[ Something is wrong. You bolt up from the pile of blankets that you call a bed and your eyes dart around the closet as you furrow your brow trying to discern why you feel so much different. ]

✩ chapter three : the smitten paladin (4.6k words)

[ You’re starting to think the planet isn’t the reason you’re so hot all the time.

You had woken up this morning feeling a bit better than you thought you’d be, your stomach is full of butterflies but you're still standing and considering the night you had you’re gonna take that as a win. ]

chapter four : sarad'ika (6.8k words)

[ Sarad'ika.

You won’t forget it this time, you can’t. So you write it in your book, just under Mando’s favorite color you write the two little words that have been keeping you up at night. ]

✩ chapter five : lunar interlude : just a man (5.0k words)

[ Absurd.

It’s absurd how much the job pays. Din’s not even sure he should take it at this point because it’s too good to be true. ]

✩ chapter six : torment (5.1k words)

[ Okay, maybe you didn’t think this through.

You didn’t think he’d actually come in and now suddenly the door is shut and you’re alone with him. ]

✩ chapter seven : just friends (3.1k words)

[ Maker it feels like it’s been an hour and you’re both just laying here. He was just inside of you; it shouldn't be so hard to find something to talk about at this point. ]

chapter eight : solar markets (5.3k words)

[ It’s nice to wake up excited again.

You wish you could say that it happened more often but hopefully it will from now on. It’s going to be your first time leaving the castle grounds since you got here. ]

✩ chapter nine : shuk'la rules (5.6k words)

[ You need sex.

Normally you would be satisfied for quite some time after getting off but for some reason with Mando it was different. But it’s only been two days and you need more. ]

✩ chapter ten : lunar interlude : briikase gote'tuur (4.1k words)

[ He’s grateful for the break from you, even if brief.

That’s not to say that he doesn’t enjoy every moment he gets to be in your presence but the more time he spends with you the harder it gets to remember that this isn’t real. ]

chapter eleven : he loves me not (4.6k words)

[ Something is wrong.

All day it’s been wrong.

He’s different. Distant. ]

chapter twelve : pretend (4.4k words )

[ Two days.

That’s what you’re willing to give yourself. Two days to get over it. One to get it all out of your system and one to pull yourself together. ]

chapter thirteen : lunar interlude : vercopa (3.5k words)

[ He did it.

He did exactly what he knew he needed to do.

So why does he feel worse than ever? ]

chapter fourteen : condemned (4.9k words)

[ You’re having trouble sleeping.

You have no problem falling asleep, it’s mostly staying asleep. There’s a million different things that consume your thoughts and everytime you drift into unconsciousness you find yourself jolting awake, barely able to stay asleep for more than an hour at a time. ]

chapter fifteen : two tea parties (5.4k words)

[ “What did you do to her?”

Her voice breaks through his sleepy haze as he sits up properly.

“Excuse me?” ]

chapter sixteen : absolution (4.6k words)

[ There’s a visceral sense of dread when you wake up, for several reasons.

The glaring obvious culprit of your discomfort would be the fact that today’s your husband's birthday. ]

chapter seventeen : the apostate’s cabin (3.5k words)

[ Just Din.

It’s sinking in as you walk in silence, holding his hand tightly as he pulls you towards his home. ]

chapter eighteen : portrait of a man (5.4k words)

[ It’s deliciously warm when you wake. You can feel his heartbeat and you can feel the soft traces of sunlight dancing along your back. You stretch in his arms slightly but freeze up as you feel him nuzzle his chin into your hair, planting a kiss against your hairline. ]

✩ chapter nineteen : reverence (7.3k words)

[ You really want to.

You couldn’t possibly want to more than you currently do.

It’s actually a bit mean. That he’s left you here in this state. ]

✩ chapter twenty : like real people do (8.4k words)

[ Mando and Din.

All you can think about right now is how there must be two of them.

You’re playing with his curls. ]

✩ chapter twenty one : te mirci't (9.0k words)

[ “It means I love you.”

You aren’t entirely sure how long you stare at him, looking rather silly with your jaw practically on the floor. ]

✩ chapter twenty two : it’s you that i lie with (11.3k words)

[ Naboo has several trading ports.

You could get him on a cargo ship. That would be the most inconspicuous form of transport. It would help if he was willing to ditch his armor. ]

✩ chapter twenty three : lunar markets (15.0k words)

[ Sneaking out of the castle gets easier every time you do it.

It only takes a few minutes and you’re walking outside towards the forest trail, Din’s hand in yours, still giddy. ]

✩ chapter twenty four : lunar interlude : riduur (7.8k words)

[ He doesn’t deserve this.

How could he possibly be deserving of you? Yet somehow you make him feel as if he is. With your soft touch and the way your eyes get just a little bigger when you see him. ]

✩ chapter twenty five : wedding bells (11.7k words)

[ Four days of Leo.

You were upset that Din was leaving you but you got over it rather quickly with the promise of his hasty return. ]

chapter twenty six : crucifixion (12.7k words)

[ “My room is too big.”

He bursts into genuine peals of laughter and you gently smack his arm.

“Don’t laugh, it’s a serious issue! My room is enormous.” ]

chapter twenty seven : the apostate (6.0k words)

[ Silence.

That’s all there is in his brain.

It’s hard enough as is for him to hear. It doesn’t help when he’s been beaten half to death. ]

✩ chapter twenty eight : a place for us (8.4k words)

[ You’d spent the better half of the day trying to get on top of him.

Every time you managed to get close he’d simply set you down on the nearest surface with a kiss on the cheek and go back to doing whatever he was working on. ]

chapter twenty nine : the best kept secret (epilogue) (6.1k words)

[ The morning sun is warm against your face, you bask in it, unmoving and only half awake until you feel a tiny hand slapping your cheek. The illusion of tranquility is immediately shattered as you softly laugh. ]

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nasa · 1 year

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Follow NASA’s Artemis I Moon Mission: Live Tracker, Latest Images, and Videos

youtube

On Nov. 16, 2022, the Artemis I mission officially began with the launch of the Orion spacecraft atop the Space Launch System rocket. The rocket and spacecraft lifted off from historic Launch Complex 39B at NASA’s Kennedy Space Center in Florida.

Now, the Orion spacecraft is about halfway through its journey around the Moon. Although the spacecraft is uncrewed, the Artemis I mission prepares us for future missions with astronauts, starting with Artemis II.

Stay up-to-date with the mission with the latest full-resolution images, mission updates, on-demand and live video.

Imagery:

Find full-resolution images from the Orion spacecraft as they are released here.

Launch imagery can be found here. When Orion splashes down in the Pacific Ocean on Dec. 11, the images will be available here, as well!

youtube

Videos:

This playlist contains informational videos, as well as upcoming and past live events, about Artemis I.

You can watch a livestream of the Artemis I mission here. (Just a note: the livestream may cut off during moments when the Orion team needs higher bandwidth for activities.)

Keep yourself updated on the upcoming broadcasts of Artemis milestones with the NASA TV schedule.

Trackers:

Our Artemis I Tracker uses live telemetry data streamed directly from Mission Control Center in Houston to show Orion position, attitude, solar array positions, and thruster firings throughout the mission.

“Eyes on the Solar System” shows Orion's position along the Artemis I trajectory and in relation to other NASA spacecraft and objects in the solar system.

“DSN Now” shows which antenna on Earth’s Deep Space Network is communicating with Orion.

youtube

Updates:

Read up on where Orion is and what’s next in the Artemis I mission with the Mission Blog.

Thank you so much for following with us on this historic mission. Go Artemis!

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space!

#nasa #space #moon #science #technology #artemis #nasamoonsnap #orion #megamoonrocket #sls #spacelaunchsystem #lunarmission #Youtube

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black-lake · 1 year

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self care based on your chart

I talked about the signs and houses connection to body parts and many of you requested this post. These are ways to do your self-care using your chart, the signs, and planetary placements and aspects. The same concept can be applied using simple self-love practices in other areas of life too.

✧ notes

I recommend you look at your transits chart or solar return as well to better know the best self-care practices at the time. You can base your general self-care on your natal chart but the transits can tell you the best times to take action or avoid taking action on something significant.

Look for the planets placements and their aspects, mainly if in the angular houses or make many significant aspects. Like I mentioned before I got so much dental work done when saturn was in the 10th, conjunct my mc and opposite north node, it was expensive but I was able to afford it.

You can also consider the degrees if you're feeling extra, in your natal chart and your solar return. Degrees can be associated with signs, so they can be simply linked to the areas they rule.

Planets rule things related to body parts like diseases or accidents and influence certain parts of the body depending on the aspects they make. Also two planets can influence the same body parts.

✧ SIGNS

Aries/1st house - head, face, brain, eyes

— Prone to headaches so get quality sleep, wash your hair often, and do wash your makeup, nothing heavy on the head. Exercise and workout in general helps release any pent-up energy or stress. Take good care of your eyes, sunglasses, eye drops, natural eye products/makeup. Keep your brain healthy. Foods and supplements that regulate your energy levels. Head massages, soft pillows, facemasks, frequent haircuts, breathing exercises, get enough brain oxygen. Fast thinkers and can have racing thoughts, so journaling, running, meditating can help. Release anger in healthy ways.

Taurus/2nd house - neck, ears, throat, thyroid

— The senses can be heightened so make sure your environment is comfortable, the temperature, the sounds, scents, fabrics, the food, arrange it like it's a visions board. Coffee, tea, warm soups, breads and oats, and warm herbal drinks that work for you. Can cling to that one thing they like, so do change your diet from time to time to get different nutrient. Renew your clothes, make your space cozy. Neck massages, aromatherapy, and body relaxation methods. Singing or writing, chill playlists, comfy places and peaceful walks. Cooking your own food can be therapeutic and healing for you.

Gemini/3rd house - arms, hands, lungs, shoulders

— Tend to be anxious and restless, since it also rules the nervous system and is ruled by mercury, so the mind is central. Can't stress it enough, but writing, journaling, speaking just getting your thoughts out. Since the mind is always active, look for ways to release that mental energy. Cardio, pilates, fast sports, board games, socialising. Can have fast metabolism and lean long body parts so accustom your diet and exercise based on that. Massage your shoulders, read a book, and do stretch regularly. Honestly.. joke around, taking all those thoughts seriously is no good. DO YO NAILLS 💅

Cancer/4th house - chest, breast, stomach, womb

— Ruled by the moon, get a healthy outlet for your emotions, accept your emotions, write, speak up, cry when you need, watch something funny, your comfort show, make yourself laugh. Check your hormones regularly, find a good diet for stomach health, whole grains and high-fiber foods, take your digestive supplements. Do yoga, stomach exercises, breathing exercises. Drink lots of water. Choose your friends wisely, find people you trust. Make your bedroom comfy, invest in a quality bed, get yourself comfy clothes. Cooking your own food is again a self love thing to do, baking, homey places, nature and quiet places. Get you a furr baby.

Leo/5th house - heart, spine, spinal column, upper back

— Ruled by the sun, go out more and get your vitamin d. Choose heart-healthy foods, leafy greens and soluble fiber foods and supplements. Check your heart health and blood pressure. Do exercises that work for both your heart, your upper back and shoulders, aerobic exercises, fun sports and activities. You can be generous to everyone but be generous to yourself too, buy yourself gifts, spoil yourself. Do a full hair and skin routine, find a hobby, watch shows that inspire you, make your inner child happy. Embrace you emotions, your skills, pursue your passions, be expressive and go out for adventures.

Virgo/6th house - abdomen, digestive system, intestines, spleen

— Listen to your body and keep adjusting your diet and routine to fit your needs. Your body can be just as picky, so be mindful of the food you consume, of any allergies or foods that are hard to digest. Get your digestive supplements and enzymes, do your research. Choose gut-healthy foods and the best times to eat for you. Go for a nature walk, exercise to release any pent-up stress, cardio or pilates. Get indoors plants or plant them yourself. Spend time with pets. Make your own natural medicine that works for you, even if as simple as tea. Read a book, journal to organize your thoughts, keep your space clean. Reward yourself and acknowledge your efforts and progress.

Libra/7th house - kidneys, lower back, bladder, buttocks

— Find a way to maintain a balanced lifestyle that works for you. Add a variety of nutrients to your diet, foods for healthy kidneys to make that skin glow, antioxidant foods and supplements. Keep your kidneys and bladder healthy. Lower body and buttocks exercises, strength training, dancing, going out for walks. Decorate and beautify your own place, try new recipes, go for a picnic. How you feel is more important than how you look, make yourself feel pretty, do a skincare routine, create a vision board, romanticize your life. Be the person you want to love and identify your own opinions from those of others, yours matter.

Scorpio/8th house - genitals, colon, urethra, reproductive system

— With all those transformative energies, change what you consume to fulfill your changed needs, feeding your body and mind the proper nutrients. Maintain healthy reproductive organs and balanced hormones, do your check ups. Maintain healthy guts, fiber and antioxidant rich foods, high vitamin drinks, herbal medicine can be beneficial too. Lower body and muscle exercises, stretch regularly, breath and meditate to calm your mind. Invest in quality skincare and unscented hygiene products. Journal, write your reflections, your progress and goals, positive affirmations, light your great scented candles and watch a funny show.

Sagittarius/9th house - thighs, hips, liver, legs

— Go out and wander around, exploring new places, foods, and random things will light you up, you know it. Find a diet that works for your energy levels, protein rich foods and shakes, citrus and greens, simple nutritious meals. Watch out for any leg injuries. Go out for running, do leg exercises, muscle building, any outdoors sports. Write a bucket list, update your wishes list, go for mini solo adventures, speak to the locals when you travel, learn new words, find authentic travel souvenirs. Listen to a podcast or watch a documentary, keep a positive outlook on your future, positive environment and self-talk.

Capricorn/10th house - bones, joints, knees, skin, hair

— Can get caught up in doing or not doing things, so allow yourself to both be active and rest when you need. Find foods and supplements that are good for bone strength and joint health, calcium and magnesium rich foods, going out and getting your vitamin d is good for both your skin and bones. Going for morning runs, muscle building workouts, chiropractic-approved exercises and stretches, any leg sports. Invest in skincare and dental care. Write down things like goals, tasks list, and self development notes. Watch things that motivate you and light you up, acknowledge how far you’ve come.

Aquarius/11th house - ankles, calfs, achilles, circulatory system

— Can be very future focused, so do protect your hopes and find an outlet to express them but enjoy the present as it is. Add water-rich foods to your diet, foods that help the blood flow like fatty fish, avocados and other circulation boosters or supplements. Exercises that improve circulation like jogging, cycling, cardio, dancing, swimming. Find ways to express your ideas of the world and fantasies, music can put you in that creative energy, meditation, talking to a friend. Take a long bath, light some candles, write down your ideas, your hopes and dreams, your thoughts and what you're grateful for.

Pisces/12th house - feet, toes, pineal gland, lymphatic system

— Can also be spacey and future focused so any self expression activities can help that energy flow. Choose foods that help maintain your body fluid balance, water-rich foods, leafy veggies, omega 3 rich foods, and supplements that boost lymphatic drainage. Avoid foods that drain your lymphatic system. Find hobbies that light you up, listen to music, paint, be creative. Nature walks, swimming, cardio, cycling, dancing. Taking frequent baths and soaking your feet in soap and epsom salt water can release stress from the feet area, grounding activities, reflecting, journaling and writing down your hopes and thoughts.

✧ PLANETS

Sun - heart, head, spine, spinal cord, eyes — can influence vitality, heart function, headaches, fever, eyesight.. etc

Moon - stomach, breast, lungs, blood circulation, body fluids — can influence colds, blood flow, dehydration, stomach issues.

Mercury - nervous system, ears, mouth, skin — can influence ear problems, mental illness, restlessness, breathing issues.

Venus - face, cheeks, throat, bladder, skin — can influence skin issues, bladder infections, throat issues, carbs and sugar balance.

Mars - chest, muscles, blood, genitals — can influence accidents, wounds, muscles weakness, energy levels, genital diseases.

Jupiter - liver, kidneys, pancreas, thighs — can influence cholesterol issues, fatty liver, toxins overload, diabetes, kidneys issues.

Saturn - bones, teeth, hair, legs, joints, knees — can influence knee or joint problems, dental problems, wisdom teeth, bone diseases, hair loss.

Note that these are just suggestions that I hope remind you and inspire you to listen to your body and take good care of it, discern, do your research and take only what works for you. much love 🫶

#astrology #astrology signs #astrology planets #medical astrology #self love #self care #self improvement #astro notes #astro observations #astro placements #astro community #birth chart #solar return #transits #astrology transits #astrology degrees #healthy habits #health

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welcometowriteblr · 2 days

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WTW PRESENTS OUR 41ST EVENT!

WelcomeToWriteblr brings you another prompt event, this one themed around the planets of our solar system! Like our last prompt event, this month is a redux of an older event that we’d once again like to bring to the community!

From MAY 25TH TO MAY 31ST create something in response to that day’s prompt and post it. You’re welcome to do absolutely anything for the prompt of the day, whether it be a drawing, an excerpt, a playlist, or a moodboard. This event is aimed to get everyone involved and we will accept all submissions!

HOW TO PARTICIPATE

Tag your posts as #WTWEVENT and #WTWCOMMUNITY

Format your posts like this: WTW PLANET PROMPTS - PLANET NAME: CHOSEN PROMPT

Wait for your post to be added to the queue.

NSFW content will not be posted to the blog.

OPTIONAL: Join our discord server if you would like to ensure your post makes it onto the blog! Tumblr’s tagging system can be unreliable and we want to make sure everyone’s creations are shared! Please note, you must be 15 OR OLDER to enter our server!

PROMPT LIST

Day 1 - Mercury - Locations or Travel

Day 2 - Venus - Politics

Day 3 - Earth - Nature

Day 4 - Mars - War or Conflict

Day 5 - Jupiter - Religion or Commerce

Day 6 - Saturn - Luxury or Cuisine

Day 7 - Uranus - History or Science

Day 8 - Neptune - Lore or Mythology

Day 9 - Pluto - Death

GO BEYOND THE STARS, JOIN OUR SERVER HERE! (discord.gg/earlgrey)

#welcometowriteblr #wtwcommunity #writeblr #writers of tumblr #writing community #announcement #event

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mimixmunson · 3 months

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Sleeping with the light on / Steddie / One shot<3

CW- Implied death, fear of the dark, mention of willreading.

A/N- title is from this song!

Eddie Munson can’t sleep without a nightlight. He’s not embarrassed about it, why should he be? It brings him comfort, so what if they’re 19? It’s a red bulb that projects the solar system onto his ceiling and when Steve first starts staying overnight it’s frustrating. He tries his hardest not to toss and turn too much and wake Eddie in process, but the light is blinding to him. It’s not a harsh light by any means, it’s soft, pastel even. But Steve has never slept with a light on, in fact he’s painted his walls a deeper colour every year to keep the light out.

When the light fades and the curtains close each night in present time. When the last track of his comfort playlist comes to an end. He’ll reach out for an Eddie shaped hug, met only with a pillow. Sighing, he gets out of bed. Scrambling around the wall relentlessly looking for the light switch. Hitting it perhaps a little too hard, he groans at the buzzing sound of the dying bulb connected to his ceiling, wishing he took the nightlight that Eddie treasured when it was offered to him in his will reading service.

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starfish-sonnyangel · 4 months

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introducing, for the first time online since i starting thinking abt this in 2020, drumroll please: my personal hc for auri's sisters name is Callisto (Callie) Mei-Huang O'Malley. take a seat, get comfy, put on a good playlist, let me explain. in the books we're given most of her name, 'callie o'malley'. but to me callie feels like too much of a nickname, it feels too informal. knowing that auri also went primarily by a nickname instead of her full name, aurora, makes me think the same went for callie. their parents are both very space-inclined people, and i feel like they'd keep the cosmic-themed names going (aurora borealis, callisto - jupiter's second largest moon and the third largest moon in our solar system, you can see where im going w this). i think callie neverrr used callisto except on paperwork n official stuff, she used callie exclusively to the point where the only people who actually called her by her birth name was her mom when she got in trouble. i think she wouldn't love the name since its so distinct and kinda uncommon but it would have some deep meaning to her parents so she'd never complain abt it to them. for her first name i kinda went between cassiopeia, calypso, celestia, but in the end i think callisto fits the best.

i also kept the middle name pattern going, staying true to my internal linguistics nerd something interesting i noticed is the first part of auri’s middle/chinese name is Jie, and in mandarin chinese the word for eldest sister is jiějie (姐姐). i doubt this is intentional on the author’s part, but going with that trend mèimei (妹妹) means younger sister in mandarin, therefore i present you with Mei-Huang. (Huang (黃) on the other hand i didnt have a deep reason for i just chose it bc it sounded pretty lmao). last thing that i found kinda funny is according to my top sources (aka google.com) the name Jié (杰) means ‘heroic, prominent, outstanding person’ which is pretty fitting for auri lol. also important to note that Jié and Jiě would be pronounced differently, here’s my fav website for audio examples of the pronunciation (https://www.chinese-word.com/voice/00jie.html). anyways please let me know if you have any questions, comments, ideas, critiques, suggestions! i am open to all of the above and anything else yall would like to add. *walks away*

#aurora jie lin o'malley #aurora cycle #the aurora cycle #callie o'malley #headcanon #aurora rising

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tanerine · 3 months

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I associate my femininity with the moon, and my masculinity with the stars. I only realized after I chose the name Sunny that I had become a little solar system all by myself

Hi! I’m Sunny/Lego :)

» 22 - Bisexual/Bigender - She/Her/He/Him - AMAB (Femme Presenting)

» Writer, artist, photographer, voice actor, stage actor/theater jack-of-all-trades, and Dungeon Master. Ask me about my OCs, PCs, and NPCs :)!

» Lego, Space, Hot Wheels, DC Comics, Hero Forge, Dimension 20, Doctor Who, Star Trek: SNW, various other things I can’t think of rn

» If you want a real good read on me, check out my playlist!

#photo by op #op is bigender #transgender #queer #queer community #bisexual #intro post #pinned post

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hazelnut-u-out · 8 months

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i've been neglecting morty in my fics lately, so i tried my hand at writing him again.

just something short and sweet to play around with, plus some effort to explore a few other characters!

anyway, ao3 link here! full text below the cut. :)

'Choosing to Sabotage Your Social Life'

2400 words

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Morty tightened his grip on the steering wheel, that familiar vortex pulling at the inside of his ribs and aching his stomach.

Anger.

It was budding from annoyance. He had to be honest, he’d been angry since his phone had rang an hour ago, and even angrier when he’d realized Rick had locked the portal gun in his safe.

There was a whoosh and a slight jolt as the ship entered the asteroid’s artificial atmosphere, marked by a distinctive layer of thick cobalt clouds.

“Arrived: Asteroid 3-D89,” the ship’s AI said flatly. “If anyone cares, that is.”

“Jeez, man,” Morty huffed, tapping his left foot with irritation. “I’m not Rick. You don’t have to be so harsh.”

“Try not to take it personally. I’m programmed with a predisposition to conversational flippancy.” She still sounded annoyed, but Morty was beginning to think it was her default.

“Whatever. Thanks for the directions.”

Morty squinted, trying to get a feel for the parking situation the best he could in the flashing neon haze.

These sorts of things always made him nervous. He’d only been to this bar one other time, and Rick had been driving. Morty still wasn’t sure why they’d gone there, but he’d chalked it up to some sort of sketchy space drug deal. Most of Rick’s shit was like that– or close enough that he could get an idea of what was going on by picturing that scenario in his head.

One visit– especially one where he hadn’t driven– wasn’t enough to be comfortable with the location, and his chest swelled with anxiety. There were a lot of variables he couldn’t account for.

He brought his right thumb to his mouth, gnawing on the edge of the nail.

Morty thought most people must feel bigger when this far above everyone else. He knew Rick did. He assumed that when everyone looked so tiny and you were already a raging narcissist, it was hard not to feel more important.

Morty felt smaller up there, though— especially when he was alone.

The asteroid wasn’t anything impressive, literally just a mid-sized building and a parking lot large enough for twenty-five to thirty crafts at most. The horizon was the edge of the bar’s flat roof. It was rosy pink in some parts, and dark violet in others. Probably just peeps of the light mostly obscured from the three-star center of this system this time of their solar cycle. It was nearing the season change for the outer belt. The gas giants were shifting to let those blushing swathes of light reach the outskirts.

Morty caught a glimpse of two aliens sharing what looked to be something like a cigarette at the far end of the lot.

Still no space.

His stomach hurt.

“Oh, thank fuck,” Morty breathed out, finally noticing an empty spot near the front right of the establishment. Relief let his shoulders fall as he pushed his hips forward.

He positioned the ship above the space, reaching out and pressing his index finger against the auto park button.

He had to admit, it did come in handy.

Morty sighed as the ship began to lower itself slowly, bringing his hands up to cover his face. Finally– a moment to collect himself in silence.

He sat there, a few long breaths hissing past his tense fingers and warming his cheeks, before shifting to pull out his phone. The lights outside gave a tacky overcast to the whole scene.

He scrolled, finding his chat thread with Squanchy and typing out a quick message:

‘send him out, thx :)’

Morty stared blankly at the screen. He felt sick.

He wasn’t ready for whatever drunk Rick was about to do or say.

“Ugh.” He pressed the home button and opened Instagram, scrolling through the explore page numbly. He thought about queuing up a playlist, but he’d probably be too overstimulated to drive and listen to music with Rick in the passenger seat.

There was a tap at the window. Morty started, turning his head quickly and throwing his phone across the ship as he met Squanchy’s apologetic gaze.

“Shit,” the teen muttered, plastering on an awkward smile and rolling the window down sheepishly.

“‘Sup, kiddo?” Squanchy said softly, rubbing his elbow and lowering his eyes.

“Nothin’ much, man!” Morty replied. “H–Hey, thanks for calling me. I wouldn’t have wanted you guys to be stuck with him.”

“Ah, no worries, buddy.” Squanchy laughed, but reached out and gently placed a warm paw on Morty’s shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze. “Look, I’m really sorry you had to come all the way out here. I know it’s a school night on Earth and all, and you shouldn’t have to be dealing with this sorta shit.”

Morty didn’t know why, but he felt a lump in his throat. He swallowed it down, leaning into the kind touch a bit.

“Don’t be silly. My parents hardly notice when I’m gone,” he said, bringing a hand up and resting it on the other’s paw. “Where is the old fart, anyway?”

“Uh…” Squanchy pulled his arm back, that apologetic look creeping onto his expression once again as he rubbed the back of his neck. “He said to tell ya he’d be a minute, and that you could come in and watch him if you wanted. I told him you’d probably say no, and that they don’t let kids in here.”

Morty quirked an eyebrow. “Watch him do what, exactly?”

“Karaoke… Sort of. It’s more squanchin’ at this point.” The words came out with an uncomfortable twinge.

“Oh,” Morty said, more flatly than he’d meant to. “Just… tell him I’ll be in the car, yeah?”

“I’ll let ‘em know,” Squanchy said, turning. Morty reached to roll the window back up before his grandfather’s friend turned back around. “Sorry, again. Let me know when you guys make it home, yeah?”

“It’s really no problem, but sure thing, dude.”

Morty rolled the window up the rest of the way.

It was a few more minutes before a large, burly-looking turquoise alien came out, grasping a flailing Rick at the shoulders with a sturdy set of tentacles. Morty took a breath to steady himself— trying to remind himself how to look normal— and hopped out of the car, his slippers making a gentle sort of ‘clack’ sound on the pavement.

He was suddenly very aware of his matching yellow pajama set. They probably thought he was ten years old!

“Over here!” The boy waved one arm over his head, motioning for the creature to deliver his grandfather to where he stood.

The alien acknowledged him with a kind nod, tucking the old man in on one side and adjusting his trajectory slightly to their left.

“Thanks for bringing him out, sir,” Morty said bashfully as the creature got close enough to hear. He gestured for him to follow, walking around the ship and opening the passenger side door. “You–You can put him in here if you want.”

“Don’t thank him, you little dick,” Rick slurred with a hiss, spittle flying out when his teeth touched. “Asshole pulled me o–off stage in the middle of an encore.”

“Morty, right?” The alien asked, ignoring Rick and placing him on the seat. He leaned in and secured the buckle, much to the elder’s physical protest.

His syntax was sort of clicky and had a rasp to it that Morty found quite pleasant.

“That’s my name!” Morty said, throwing out a little finger gun in a desperate attempt to seem casual, immediately regretting it.

“Mooooorty,” Rick whined. “I said do–”

A tentacle reached out and slammed the door, cutting the old man’s sentence short.

Okay, yeah. Morty really liked this guy.

“Your grandpa here talks a lot about you. I hear you’re a pretty smart kid,” he said, closing two of his four eyes in what Morty assumed was a rough approximation of a wink.

“Pffff, nah,” the kid said, waving one hand dismissively.

“Whatever you say, little guy. Well, have a safe trip home!” The kind stranger trilled, heading back towards the opening of the bar.

“Yeah, you too!” Morty chirped in response, making a mental note to punch himself for it later.

“That was real rude of you, Morty ,” Rick snapped when Morty climbed back into the driver’s seat, hissing his grandson’s name as if it were a curse word.

Morty sighed, clicking his belt buckle into place and twisting the key.

Angry drunk it was, then.

“What was?” Morty inquired, lifting the ship from the ground. “Car, could you pull up some directions to get us home, please?”

“Sure, yeah, of course,” the ship replied, displaying a little map with a yellow point to indicate their current position. She spoke slowly, almost as if she’d made a conscious effort to sound pleasant.

It didn’t work.

“Thank you.”

Morty made a point to thank her when he remembered to.

“Not comin’ in t–to watch me perform. You wonder why no one likes you, but… but maybe it’s because you don’t even try,” the elder grumbled, bringing his knees up to hug them and pressing one cheek against the glass.

The ship punched a second hole in that layer of plush clouds and the blur of stars started to lull past them.

“Oh, yeah. I’m so sorry for coming to pick you up at 3 a.m.” Morty gripped the wheel so hard his knuckles turned white. “I have a math test in the morning, you know.”

Breathe.

“I’m jus–just sayin’, buddy. If you wanna have a social life, you’ve gotta make an effort.”

“Yeah, and I’m sure hanging out in some sleazy bar with a bunch of senior citizens would’ve really opened some doors for me in that department. Thanks, Rick.” Morty rolled his eyes.

“Morty, I don’t know a single alien culture as uptight about aging as humans.”

“Good to know,” Morty said, trying his best to shake off the animosity he held and be amicable. He didn’t feel like spending the whole ride arguing, “Did you have a nice time? It must be nice to see old friends.”

He thought maybe he tended to expect the worst with these kinds of things, often getting angry before there was much to be angry about. After all, in terms of Rick doing fucked up shit, this was a notably tolerable level of fucked up.

“Yeah, it was nice. You tend to see friends when you’re actually able to make them,” Rick replied, scoffing. Morty flinched. “Can I ask ya something?”

“Shoot,” Morty said, checking his blind spot.

It was pointless. Space was painfully empty, but Jerry had argued with Rick about it during a lesson once and his brain had latched onto the idea of something being there— not that there was even a need to merge. He just made sure Rick never caught him glancing.

“Do I have a vibe about me?”

Morty raised a brow, not able to stop himself from smiling at the humor in the question. “Uh, I’d say yeah. Everyone does. That’s how vibes work.”

“But I… I—I mean, like, a safe vibe that makes people think I’m a good listener,” Rick clarified, looking comically earnest. “Like a, uh… therapist vibe, I guess?”

Morty let out a deep laugh at that one, much to his grandfather’s bewilderment. He abandoned the wheel to clutch his stomach. Wiping away a tear, he wheezed out, “No. I’d— ah… I’d say you’re good on that one. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten the vibe that you wanted to listen to me.”

“Well,” Rick said, pouting and crossing his arms with a huff. “I think all the lonely old drunks in there would’ve disagreed.”

“Oh, really ?” Morty teased, giggling again.

“Yes!” Rick said, seeming to miss the sarcasm in Morty’s playful retort. “Had some weird lady come up and tell me her brother died in some accident the other day. I don’t even have any siblings!” He threw his hands in the air for dramatic effect, looking more like a wrinkly child in a disheveled lab coat than a live-in grandpa of two. Morty stifled another laugh. “D—Do I look like a guy that could relate to that? What do you even say to something like that as an only child?!”

“Maybe you just look like a sad drunk,” Morty offered, shrugging. “Or maybe it was the charming karaoke that made you seem so open-minded and approachable.”

“Eh.” Rick tried to shrug, but slumped forward too quickly, bouncing his head off the dash. Morty winced on his behalf. “You ruined the whole night, though. Had to tell ‘em I had to go because you—you didn’t wanna come in and spend time with your grandpa. Fu—Fuckin’… family and your generation don’t mix.”

Morty felt that familiar itch beneath his skin— that incessant irritation begging to bubble out of him and grab Rick by the throat.

“I dunno why you say these things,” Morty grumbled through clenched teeth, his back straightening. “I just wanted to be helpful. That bar wouldn’t have let me in, anyway. I’m in my pajamas .”

“I mean, think about it,” Rick said mockingly. “At least her brother died in a way she couldn’t control. You left your sister to die. We’re one and the same, buddy— you and me.” The elder threw a hand out on his shoulder, shaking the teen so hard that the ship rocked with them. “Deadbeats.”

Morty didn’t know if the tears were from anger, grief, guilt, or that ever-constant pit in his chest he could never quite fill up, but he let them slip out silently, anyway.

——

“What did you say to her?” Morty asked, barely audible, after a bit.

“Hm?” Rick hummed, now reclined and nearly comatose on his back, wrapped in a tight swaddle he’d clumsily fashioned from his own lab coat. “Who?”

“The lady whose brother died. What’d you say to her?”

He didn’t really know why he cared what Rick had said. He thought, maybe, he just wanted to know if he’d have done something different.

“Oh. I told her to fuck off,” Rick slurred matter-of-factly. “Did her a favor. Ya can’t expect the universe to baby you. We all lose something to it.”

“Huh,” Morty breathed, feeling a bit lighter. “I would’ve offered her a hug,” He thought out loud. “I would’ve listened.”

Rick snored. Morty listened.

-----

#rick and morty #rick sanchez #morty smith #my fics

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c-kiddo · 11 months

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hiya!! do you have any mount eerie songs in particular you'd like to recommend?? ive listened to lost wisdom and i hold nothing and fell in love with em!!

love your art and your writing also!! they both give a sense of cosiness that i can't explain so so nice xx

oh man i always get mixed up anyway about where a bunch of songs are from since he rerecords things and uses parts of songs between things , also i dont remember if ive listened to all of No Flashlight or not. (also just found more comments on mount eerie songs that i left 5 years ago and then i guess entirely forgot about. lol). but anyway thats a ramble but, for sure check out: Solar system (live in copenhagen), Wooly mammoth’s mighty absence, voice in headphones, what?, who?, Cold mountain, Blue light on the floor, Through the trees pt.2. With my hands out. im definitely forgetting stuff for sure.. honestly listening to it all in order is worth it because he calls back to lyrics and strumming patterns and things.and theyre all v good. (except i don't think i've listened to all of Ocean roar yet.) and i want to recommend songs like Soria Moria and Tintin in tibet and Two paintings by Nikolai Astrup and Crow and Earth and Distortion and Ravens, but you kind of have to listen to them as part of their albums (which ik is so hard because man those albums are devastating but , yknow. its weird extracted from them, theyre part of their stories)

(i have a playlist on my phone thats my personal 'best of elverum' thats his stuff from mount eerie and the microphones , so maybe i should put that on spotify or something)

also thankyou sm :'-) glad u like it

#'i hold nothing' is so good T_T #idr if i listened to it before #ive been listenign to his Microphones stuff recently #jus listened to It was hot we stayed in the water #asks #can you tell i hjave autism about this .

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idkthisisjustforfanfic · 2 years

Text

A STUDY IN YOU, chapter fourteen

table of contents | talk to me & join the tag list | the playlist

March 13th, 2019

The door clicked shut behind Sophie, her footsteps faded down the hall when Jason turned to see you. His hands were in his pockets, tie loose around his neck when a dimple appeared on his cheek. “Well, there’s that.”

“She’s not going to tell anyone,” you waved him off quickly, stretching out on the sofa. You were too drunk to have a serious conversation at this time of night.

“I know,” he laughed, still standing in the center of the room. “But she is a character.”

“She is,” you agreed, reaching for the glass of water once more. Another sip, he watched in silence and you wondered if the weed was a good enough excuse to say your thoughts out loud. You took the chance.

“So--you didn’t like Connor.”

His eyes met yours, unreadable like he couldn’t tell if you were challenging him or just observing. When you let your head fall back against the cushions and your eyes closed, he laughed a little, coming to sit beside you.��

“I don’t know Connor.”

“You didn’t seem to like him,” you opened one eye and watched him for a sign of emotion. His elbows were on his knees, he stared off into space and the clock on the wall ticked to remind you that graduation was hurdling closer with every second.

He looked over at you now, caught you looking and smiled. “You’re allowed to date him.”

This brought you back to the same solar system. You sat up quickly, your eyes bugged out of your head. “What?”

He shrugged, unsure why this caused such a reaction.

“I just met him tonight--”

“He was obviously interested in you--”

“He’s Max’s little brother!”

“--seeing as he wouldn’t leave you alone all night.”

“You’re the one who was rude at the end of the night to him.”

Both of you were more emotional now, a charge in your words that hadn’t been there before. “Because he seemed to think that you’d end up going home with him.”

“So you were jealous,” you said it quickly, a nod to confirm that your suspicion was true--with or without his input.

He blinked a few times, shrugged a shoulder and fought the smirk that threatened to rat him out. He stood from the couch and turned, offering his hand to help you up. “Forgive me for thinking that I’m the one you go home with.”

With one look he’d managed to shift courses, avoid the tension that was mounting and defuse the bomb of uncertainty that beeped somewhere in the distance. You laughed a little, felt the thumping in your chest when he nodded towards the bathroom. “Wanna shower?”

March 24th, 2019

He waited on the sidewalk, texted mindlessly when you tried to get your mom off the phone.

“Okay, mom, yeah—I’ll let you know.”

Your aunt’s birthday, a girls trip to New York, you could take them to the museums!

You’d check your calendar and get back to her, but your lunch break wasn’t the time for this conversation. You promised to call later, smiled apologetically when you turned back to him and started walking. Over toward Bryant Park, a left turn when he asked.

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” you smiled. “My mom’s planning a trip to town, she’s got a lot of questions.”

He glanced over at you when you crossed the street, a nod to your shared midwestern roots. “Sounds about right.”

“What are you in the mood for?” You looked up to a neon sign overhead, gyros, falafel, chicken wings.

He slowed, looked inside the windows of a dine-in option. White table cloths and polished servers and he shrugged: why not?

Unexpected but you allowed it, followed him inside and read over the menus and listened to the specials. Your brows didn’t raise in surprise until he ordered a bottle of champagne.

He played it off with a shrug once the waiter departed. “You know, for your birthday.”

“Not this again,” you rolled your eyes, hesitant to give too serious of a reply.

“Not this again,” he repeated your words and rolled his eyes in jest. “Relax, okay? It’s a business lunch.”

Delated. You hid the disappointment on your face when the waiter reappeared with two flutes and the bottle. You watched as the bubbles raced towards the surface, smiled in appreciation and lifted a glass, just like he did.”

Awkward, and both of you knew it. Somewhere along the line the lines got more blurry and now you were six months in and playing pretend didn’t always feel so pretend, somehow. He cleared his throat.

“Here’s to twenty-eight.”

“Right,” you forced a smile.

He shifted in his seat at that, kept your gaze for a second before he asked: “are you upset with me?”

Your forehead wrinkled with confusion, the sip of champagne slid down your throat and you almost coughed in surprise. “What? No. Why--why would I be?”

He shrugged, almost like he wished he could backtrack now that he’d seen your reaction. He smiled a little, let his head tilt from side to side when he hesitated. “First I didn’t know it was your birthday, didn’t tell you about the core faculty thing, then it felt like I did a good job of pissing you off the other night--” he glanced around quickly when he realized the conversation topic was risky for such a public setting. “Regarding, y’know, Max’s brother.”

Ah, the moment you’d been waiting for: when he set you up for a slam dunk totally casual response to remind him that two could play whatever game he’d been playing for so long.

“It’s fine,” you said quickly. “And the core faculty thing is none of my business.”

Right? Right.

His eyebrows rose at that, he took another sip of champagne and nodded. “Well, Dean Vasquez let me know today that everything should be finalized by the end of the semester and next year it’ll be official.”

You couldn’t help but grin, you leaned forward and put your elbows on the table. “You deserve it,” you nodded, a soft smile. “I’m really proud of you.”

He squirmed a little in the metaphorical spotlight, made a face like it was no big deal. “To twenty-eight and promotions.”

You listened to him talk about it, smiled at the excitement in his voice after you both ordered. The comfort and ease between you felt reassuring and confusing all at once, how did that one kiss land you here?

And better yet, how were you supposed to address whatever this was and whatever it meant when in a few short months your dynamic would shift again?

He reached for his wallet after a while, you didn’t have forever and there’d already be too many questions about what took so long and where you’d eaten.

But you couldn’t let him pay for this like it meant something, couldn’t let yourself feel that level of hope or excitement. “You don’t have to pay,” you grabbed your own wallet, “let me split it with you.”

“Y/N, it’s fine,” he smiled.

“No, I mean it--”

“It was your birthday,” he reminded, eyes expectant as he waited to see how you’d challenge him.

“Yeah but,” the words pushed past your lips and landed on the table with an awkward thud. “You don’t have to care about that.”

He shrugged one shoulder, simple, quietly, like he didn’t really know what to say except for the truth. “But I do.”

You shook your head, a reminding smile: “you’re my advisor.”

“You’re my student,” he nodded, comfortable with the words and labels and…now he was on to you. “And I know I shouldn’t play favorites, but--can’t always help it.”

Your face felt hot, he caught your eye and smirked, handed his card to the waiter and then read an email from Charlie outloud. You walked back to 30 Rock, tried your best to shed whatever glow the lunchtime longing had left on your cheeks.

But you were metaphorically fucked. The constant push and pull had slithered into your brain and having sex with your professor was only half the problem.

The other half? Deciding what to do about it.

April 5th, 2019

Your phone was buzzing over and over in the pocket of your jeans. Not a phone call, not emails. Texts. And at this frequency, you knew without checking that it was Max in the group chat.

After what felt like the millionth notification you slid it out and eyed it, careful not to distract from the final presentation that Shayna Hillbringer had undoubtedly worked so hard on.

The classroom was dark for Shayna’s presentation and the semester was winding down. For third year graduating students, the start of April also meant the beginning of the end: final projects and papers and job applications as you hurtled toward the unknown.

Which is why, on this particular Friday night, you were sat in Jason’s classroom listening to Shayna ramble on about her experience working at an advertising agency.

It was fine. She was nice enough and the presentation was good enough. But of course you couldn’t focus with your phone blowing up as if the East Village was on fire.

Max Prescott (6:13pm): I’m hungry

Max Prescott (6:14pm): Are we doing anything tonight?

Max Prescott (6:14pm): Anyone want to grab dinner?

Sophie Mendez (6:14pm): I’m down! Finishing up stuff on set though, be done around 7

Naomi Halter (6:15pm): I just got home from work

Naomi Halter (6:15pm): You guys can come here! Take out?

Max Prescott (6:16pm): omg ok, let me get my life together

Max Prescott (6:16pm): Y/N????? Are you ditching us for daddy?

Sophie Mendez (6:16pm): Lmao (i’ll come when I’m out)

Naomi Halter (6:17pm): She has class, right?

Max Prescott (6:17pm): Yeah she does

Max Prescott (6:17pm): With daddy

You were about to thumb out a scathing reply, rub it in Max’s face that he was merely jealous of the fact that you were getting laid and he wasn’t.

But another text appeared at the top of your screen.

Jason Sudeikis (6:17pm): Can you at least pretend to pay attention?

You looked up at him quickly, but his eyes were already back on Shayna and her slide about storyboards for short-duration advertisements. What an ass.

You figured it’d be best to ignore all of them. Anything you replied to the group was just adding fuel to the fire, and replying to Jason’s text felt, well…not worth it. You decided that giving him a dirty look the next time he glanced in your direction would be good enough.

So you put your phone on do not disturb and did your best to stay focused. Shayna’s presentation finished early and for that he dismissed you all with ten minutes to spare. You took your time packing up, tried not to make it obvious that you, without a doubt, would be the last student in the room.

Maybe the others were somewhat aware of the relationship you had with him. Not the sexual one that happened behind closed doors (or in his office), but the mentor-mentee dynamic that this all stemmed from in the first place.

You congratulated Shayna on the completion of her coursework, loitered in the corner when she collected a graded rubric from Jason. Eventually the room thinned out and you were too buried in your phone to notice.

Y/N L/N (6:52pm): Just getting out of class, I can come by and hang for a while!

“Did you even catch a word she said?” He was eyeing you now from across the room. He slipped his laptop into his messenger bag and smirked, waiting to see what type of reaction he’d get.

“I was paying attention--but I had Max being a pain in my ass in the group chat.”

“I looked over there and you were reading that thing like a novella,” he teased.

You took a few steps closer to his desk in the corner of the room, offered a challenging smirk when he leaned against the side of it.

“I can’t believe you’re trying to go all professor on me right now.”

“Lest we forget that’s my actual job title,” he joked. But he wasn’t finished. He looked up at you now and shrugged. “I can’t let you get away with everything.”

“Well, professor,” you tilted your head to the side. “I’m sorry I wasn’t paying attention.”

He laughed, reached for his jacket that was slung over the back of his chair. “I’ll let it slide this time.”

“Good,” you chuckled. “I don’t do well with punishment.”

His eyebrows quirked at that, you immediately rolled your eyes at the dumb look on his face. “I mean from teachers.”

“You don’t strike me as the kind to get in trouble too much,” he sat on the edge of the desk now, amused by where this was headed. “You give off way more of a goody-two-shoes vibe.”

“Hi--” Shayna’s voice caused both of your heads to snap towards the door. “Sorry--I just--I realized I left my thumb-drive on the podium,” she took a few awkward steps into the room, the look on her face told you she was confused by the distance between you, or, really, the lack thereof.

Jason cleared his throat and stood, suddenly back into the version of himself you’d become less familiar with the more time you spent with him. “No problem--we were just talking about Y/N’s project.”

Shayna smiled, almost like she knew his explanation was more for himself than for her. She held up the thumb-drive to show she’d been successful. “Have a good weekend,” she waved over her shoulder.

Once she turned down the hall you both deflated, Jason blew a puff of air from his mouth and rubbed at the base of his neck. “Okay--well, uh--I also am, you know, heading out.”

“Right,” you smirked a little, why was it a turn on to see him so flustered?

He caught your eye for a second but shouldered his bag. “Are you--uh--leaving too?”

“Yeah,” you threw a thumb towards the door. “I’m heading to Naomi’s.”

“Oh,” he nodded. “Then I won’t invite you for a drink.”

You walked with him now towards the classroom door with raised eyebrows, intrigued by his sudden change in demeanor. “You were going to invite me for a drink?”

He shrugged, “Maybe. But you have plans,” he smiled.

“I do,” you confirmed. “And I’d never hear the end of it if I ditched them for you.”

He laughed, turned left with you towards the elevators. “Wouldn’t want that.”

So you waved awkwardly once you were outside the main doors, gave the vague promise of we’ll talk this weekend. You figured that neither of you knew why, but you both knew you would. Somehow, someway, for some reason. Maybe you just liked each other.

But that thought felt too real and too wrong and the subway ride to Naomi’s left you sitting in silence on a crowded train with nothing but your own thoughts.

They had a glass of wine waiting for you once you pushed the door open, a movie on and pizza on the counter. When you sunk into the couch beside Max, he turned to see you.

“Guys…can I have some advice?” You said quickly, pouncing on the opportunity when Naomi looked over at you. Sophie grabbed the remote and paused the movie, Max straightened up and kept his eyes on you.

You laughed a little, apparently this was out of character. After a pause for dramatic effect, you admitted: “I have no idea what’s going to happen with me and Jason after we graduate.”

Silence. Max looked to Sophie, Sophie looked to Naomi.

Naomi shrugged, eyes wide at your confession. “What do you want to happen?”

There it was. The same question that had been circling your consciousness for months and weeks and days on end. You traced the pattern of Naomi’s sofa.

“That’s a loaded question.”

Max crossed his legs. “You’re still going to work with him, so--things are still…off limits, right?”

“They’re a lot less off limits as co-workers than as professor-student,” Sophie held up a finger.

“Right, I mean--he had a meeting with Charlie last week. Said NBC should get me my offer letter by the end of April.”

When you first kissed him you didn’t expect to wind up here. You never expected that you’d have any reason to see him post-grad and you certainly didn’t ever think you’d be his co-worker.

“You might hate me for saying this,” Naomi prefaced. “But somewhere along the lines it feels like this became a lot more serious than anyone thought it would be.”

You stared at her, nervous. “...What do you mean?”

Sophie and Max wondered too.

“Well, you guys are apparently having sleepovers now,” she looked over to Sophie. Of course Sophie had immediately filled Max and Naomi in. “Like, regularly.”

“Twice,” you said. Wait. No. “Three times?”

Max’s eyes doubled in size, hearing a number slapped on there made it all real. “And you guys haven’t talked about after graduation?”

“No,” you said honestly. “Only in the work context.”

Sophie had been quiet. Her eyes were narrowed and you knew--based solely on the look on her face--that the wheels were turning. “Do you want to stop sleeping with him?”

The real answer was no. Of course not. But the responsible, mature, graduating adult figured that something like this might be better left in the past.

“I don’t know.”

“Elaborate, please,” Max pushed. That wasn’t a good enough answer.

You let out a dramatic sigh. “I mean, I like hooking up with him. I like spending time with him and you know, the sex is really good.”

They all liked that answer, smiles spread across the room but you held up a hand. “But it feels--” you stopped.

“It feels what?” Sophie asked, eager to hear where you were going.

“How am I supposed to bring this up to him? Admit that maybe I have some emotions or feelings about…him…or us, and--see? I don’t even know what to say! All of that would freak him the fuck out.”

Sophie was unimpressed, her mouth hung open like she thought you were being fucking stupid. “Aren’t we past the stage where you try not to spook him? You know, pretend you’re more normal than you are?”

“No!” You said quickly, shocked by her implication. “How would we be past that stage?”

“Because you guys aren’t just casually hooking up anymore,” Max looked at you like you had three heads.

“We’re not?” You asked.

“Did he buy you a birthday gift?” Max asked.

“No.”

“He didn’t do anything?”

“We went to lunch--he got a bottle of champagne. He said it was--I don’t know--partially for my birthday.”

Sophie smirked.

“But that doesn’t mean he has feelings for me,” you defended.

“How often do you guys text?” Naomi asked.

Jesus. You blinked a few times but then shrugged. You didn’t mean to put yourself on trial by asking for some feedback. “Not every day. Most days. Usually about work or school stuff.”

“I’ve literally been there when you guys just text hi,” Sophie mocked you and dropped her voice a few octaves to insinuate romance.

“Well we’re human,” you shot back at her.

“Okay,” Naomi butt in, this was obviously getting off topic and you appreciated the fact that at least one of them wanted to stay on track. “So--you have feelings for him.”

“Is that a question?” You narrowed your eyes.

“No,” Max laughed, then Sophie and Naomi did too.

You didn’t say anything, fought the smile that tried to creep onto your face when you groaned. “What the fuck am I supposed to do?!”

“Talk to him,” Sophie nearly yelled. “Tell him!”

“I would rather fail every class ever,” you decided.

Naomi ignored your theatrics. “Have you guys talked about Cannes?”

“What about it?”

“The fact that he’s basically bringing you as his date,” Sophie wiggled her eyebrows.

“No,” you pointed. “It’s an independent study.”

“That he’s grading,” Max reminded.

“So what?” You made a face at him. “Just because I’m sleeping with him doesn’t mean I get special treatment.”

“Okay,” Sophie let out a sharp laugh, yeah fucking right.

“You probably get some special treatment,” Naomi tried, always more delicate than Soph.

“I mean, maybe,” you said. “I don’t want it, though. I don’t want people to think that I’m the teacher’s pet.”

“Oh, sugar pie honey bunch,” Max cooed at you, a pitying look on his face when he clutched his heart over his sweatshirt. “Everybody already knows that.”

You groaned again, leaned your head back on the sofa and closed your eyes in turmoil. “Nevermind, forget I even asked for anyone’s advice. I will just die here on this couch and--”

“Hold on,” Naomi tried to help everything settle. “Do you think it’s worth it to talk with him about all of this? Like, if you actually want this to be mature and adult-like, don’t you think that’s probably your best option?”

“I don’t know,” you said with a sigh, ready to drop it for the evening. “I’ll think about it.”

April 9th, 2019

He was frowning when you knocked, brow furrowed in concentration before his eyes flickered up to the doorway.

“Hi,” you said quietly.

“Hi,” his eyes trailed down your legs and back.

You hadn’t texted with him over the weekend, decided to give him some space and take some of your own. There was also the petty and dumb part of you that was waiting to see if he would text you. Most of Sunday was spent avoiding your phone and the sad reality that he hadn’t.

Besides, you had Naomi’s words playing on loop and other final projects to finish. You spent Monday on set of another NBC show, counting down the minutes until you’d get to hop back in the writer’s room and do what you actually loved.

So on Tuesday you figured you’d test the water.

“I know we don’t have an appointment or anything,” you shrugged in the doorway. “But, I wanted to see if you had a minute to just look over the first draft of my paper, it’s just the analysis of Sarai’s first two features.”

He leaned back in his desk now, nodded when he outstretched his hand for the paper in yours. Staples in the top left corner, you’d already marked it up on the subway with corrections and edits but figured his input would only help. You know, seeing as he’d be grading it anyway, just like Max had reminded.

You shut the door behind you, let it click into place as you sat across from him. He looked at the paper quickly, then back at you. “Can I get it back to you tomorrow, or even Friday, maybe?”

“Sure,” you nodded, wondering how far to push. Something was obviously up. “Is, uh, is everything okay?”

“Yes, yeah,” he nodded, bringing a finger to his lips. “Just have a lot of papers to grade for one of my undergrad seminars and have a meeting with Charlie later today to get an update on casting decisions.”

Things had been moving along with the show. The executive team was put together, auditions had started and some rolles already filled. Cameras were supposed to start rolling in June, hopefully.

You stood and kept his gaze, smirked a little when you rounded his desk and sat on the edge, right in front of him. He smirked up at you, reassuring when he stood and let his hands hold onto your thighs. “Just a shitty week.”

“Well, I know something that might make you feel better,” you purred, hand grazing the outline of his cock beneath his khakis. He smirked a little, leaned forward to let his mouth find yours.

The same explosion of excitement, warmth pooled in your belly and your hands reached up to pull him closer. He smiled into your mouth, let his fingers trail up towards your panties. You let out an eager moan, one that squeaked from the back of your throat when his thumb came into contact with your clit, still separated by fabric.

But then he pulled back, cleared his throat and wiped his lips. A smudge of your lipstick on his mouth, he could see it on his hand and shook his head.

“Sorry,” he panted. “I, uh--I just don’t know if we should right now.”

He stepped back from between your legs, the same skirt you wore that first time he used his fingers. The wood of his desk was still cool on the backs of your thighs, he brought his eyes to yours and looked guilty.

“Okay.”

“Sorry--”

“It’s fine,” you hopped down and licked your lips, arousal still coursing through you when you shrugged.

He walked over to the other side of his desk, seemingly deep in thought before he swiveled. He eyed you for a second, hands in his pockets, hesitant.

“Can we talk for a second?”

You nodded, lips slightly parted when your heartbeat climbed. Oh fuck.

“I think we should talk about Cannes.”

Had you accidentally left him a 15-minute long voicemail that recorded your entire conversation with your friends? You played dumb. “...What about it?”

He glanced up at you quickly, the corner of his mouth twitched into a smile, immediate relief when you realized he wasn’t angry or upset. “Well, about both of us going on this trip.”

“Right,” you nodded obediently. You were following.

“And how obviously it might be fun to, you know, hang out in Cannes—“

“But,” you watched him.

“But we have to be really careful.”

“Yeah,” you agreed.

“I just don’t want either of us to, I don’t know, get in trouble or look bad and after Friday when Shayna almost saw us--”

“We weren’t gonna have sex right there in a classroom,” you smiled a little, challenging his anxiety.

“I know,” he said, still serious. “But, this is all still really fucking risky no matter how much we like it or how normal it is now.”

You digested his words, nodded slowly when you watched him. He was clearly more worked up than you--and in a different world, maybe you’d have asked him why or what you could do to reassure him.

You also wanted to be smart. You didn’t want him to lose his job and the fact that you’d made it this far without getting caught was almost impossible to believe. But the topic of conversation needled you, he was still in the center of the room and you were still unsure how to broach the question that seemed to hover over the vintage rug in his office.

You didn’t have answers. You didn’t have anything to say that would manage to avoid what was beginning to feel like a ticking time bomb.

You cleared your throat, smiled at him softly when you shrugged. “We don’t have to…keep doing this if you don’t want to.”

Maybe now was the right time to stop. Graduation, his promotion, it all made sense.

He nodded slowly, let out a defeated breath when he finally cracked a tiny smile. “The problem is that I want to.”

You smirked, appreciative of the way he tipped his hat and gave a peek behind the curtain. Got it. He was as confused as you were.

But there was no way--right here, right now--that you were going to address the elephant in the room. So instead of being brave and saying it all out loud, you took a step closer to him in the center of the room. “Well,” you sighed, eyes flickering to the door to warn of your upcoming departure. “Let me know when you come up with a solution.”

You felt his head turn once you walked away, his eyes watched with intrigue and confusion and excitement. But you kept walking, calling over your shoulder when you slipped out the doorway: “And what you think about my analysis so far!”

April 18th, 2019

You knocked on the door and wondered if Javier was already inside. Some TV show they were both obsessed with, a conversation at work the other day led to an invitation over to Jason’s to watch when they learned you’d never even heard of it. Oh right, Javier had teased. I always forget you were born in the 90s.

He tugged the door open and smiled, stepped aside for you to come in from the cool spring air. “Hi,” he greeted. “Did you see my text?”

“No?” You shrugged out of your coat, hung it on a hook near the door.

“Javier bailed--his baby has a fever.”

You’d seen the text come through but you were already on your way, took advantage of the fact that he’d never uninvite you.

“Oh,” you feigned disappointment. “I must have been too far underground to have any service.”

Whatever. What he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. He smirked and locked the door, “I won’t force you to watch the greatest movie of all time if you’re not in the mood.”

“I came all the way here!” You teased, following him towards the kitchen. He had a glass of wine already poured, you couldn’t help but notice that it was the same bottle--a new one--but the one you said you’d liked at his Christmas party.

Maybe he’d gotten it for you.

“However will you survive an evening with me?” he made a face over his shoulder, handed you the glass of wine that, until now, had been sitting on his counter.

He watched you take a sip.

“What?” You asked.

He laughed a little, “I feel bad that Javier canceled and you came all the way here.”

“Ahh,” you nodded. “Good think we’ve spent plenty of time alone.”

You didn’t mean for that to sound as sexual as you did. A flush to your cheeks when his eyebrows rose. “Yeah?”

“I just mean--you know--it’s not awkward.”

He laughed, shook his head but made his way towards the couch in the living room. You followed behind him, wondered what you’d talk about and if it would eventually lead to fucking him on the couch or even in the kitchen.

“Well, let’s make sure this one doesn’t get back to Dean Vasquez, alright?”

“Hey--at least I’m twenty-eight now.”

He settled onto the couch and looked up at you, amused. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Somehow, for some reason, you were bold enough to go there. Maybe it was the wine or the dim lighting or Javier’s absence. “Well, if I was older or if you were younger I think there’d be less scandal,” you shrugged.

“Oh my god,” he gasped, an offended look on his face. “You think I’m old!”

“No,” you laughed. “I mean, you are, but I just think 15 years is significant.”

“Here I was this whole time thinking the problem is that I’m your superior in almost every way,” he said sarcastically.

“That’s the hot part,” you teased, reached over to poke him in the stomach. He shrunk from your touch, grabbed your finger in his hand and held it for a second.

He let it go, let out a breath and shifted beside you.

“I think the age thing is hot too,” he quipped. “I think all of it’s hot, honestly.”

You laughed in agreement. “Yeah,” you nodded. “Me too.”

But he made no move. He didn’t reach a hand over to tease you, didn’t beg to taste you or anything that most of your encounters with him typically entailed.

One episode turned into two and then he turned to you on the couch. “I don’t know if this is weird—“ he laughed a little. A genuinely nervous look in his eyes when he looked up to see you.

“So if it is, let’s just rewind like thirty seconds to the universe in which I never brought this up, okay?”

Now he smiled at his own joke, he knew he’d saved himself from a moment of vulnerability.

“But do you wanna smoke weed?”

Your lips crept into a smile, you tried to fight it when he watched you with an expectant smirk.

“Duh,” you laughed. “Yeah.”

He stood, took a few steps towards the hallway before disappearing behind the door you knew was his. You looked around the dark living room, decorated decently for an early 40s bachelor-pad.

He reappeared with a joint in hand, nodded his head towards the balcony off the window overlooking the street. A fire-escape really, the same one from his Christmas party.

You followed him out and, took his hands when you stepped out and onto the iron structure.

You wiped your hands on your jeans and looked around at the night sky. He stood on the other end of a small landing, held up a lighter and shielded it from the wind.

He took a hit, held his breath and watched you watch a blinking plane overhead. Early April was starting to warm up, you could feel it in nights like these.

He exhaled, you looked over at him expectantly.

“This is my balcony,” he gestured around, laughed at himself when he passed the joint.

“So I’ve heard,” you teased, held it up to your lips and inhaled. You held your breath and counted to five.

He watched and smiled when you coughed a little. “What was your time like at CNN?”

You shrugged your shoulders a little once you’d gained composure. “Fine, great starting point, but being a PA wasn’t for me.”

“Yeah it doesn’t seem easy,” he nodded.

“It brought me to NYU so for that it definitely gets some points.”

He was smiling when you looked up at him. Your heart did a flip so you decided to change the topic: “How’d you end up at NYU anyway?”

“Uh, well—“ he laughed a little, almost awkwardly. “I needed a fresh start in 2013. Had a rough go of it career wise for a bit but I also—uh—I had split up with my ex-wife.”

“Oh,” you nodded, eyes narrowing with intrigue. That was a bombshell. “I didn’t know you were married once.”

Not that it bothered you. But it did feel like a curious detail to disclose after all this time.

He smirked, flicked out the joint and met your eyes. “Yeah, well, up until this year—why would you?”

You laughed a little, brazen and buzzed. “You mean you don’t tell most of your students about your love life or say their pussy’s so wet?”

He smiled wider at that, “I don’t.”

“Got it,” you nodded and smiled. “That’s good to know, like, you know, STD-wise.”

He rolled his eyes at your teasing. “Oh come on,” he laughed. “You say that as if I’m sleeping with every woman in Brooklyn.”

“No I’m not,” you defended, laughing when he shook his head. “I don’t know what you do in your personal time.”

“Well,” he sighed, still amused but more serious now. “It’s not that—I’m not sleeping with every woman in Brooklyn.”

“I’m glad,” you admitted. “Being one of many would make all of this less cool, for sure.”

“Oh,” he nodded, eyeing you suspiciously. “So being younger than me and feeling special is what does it for you.”

You watched as he took another hit, smiled a little. “You mean to tell me that you wouldn’t be pissed off if I told you I was sleeping with Will too?”

He couldn’t speak, held an inhale when he tried not to laugh. He shook his head and looked away when you giggled.

He let out his breath quickly, coughed a tiny bit but then clarified. “I’d be livid.”

“Right,” you nodded. A pause when you felt the question creeping into his mind. “...I’m not, like, seeing anyone else.”

He nodded. “Me neither.”

A cartwheel in your stomach when you realized what that meant: accidentally exclusive.

It almost came up after your birthday, but his smooth redirection in your living room ended in shower sex, not a conversation like this.

“Okay,” you reached for his joint. “Last one.”

You took it and inhaled, let him watch you when the smoke filled your lungs and you smiled in the night breeze. You followed him inside eventually, finished your glass of wine on the couch and laughed when he told you about the first time he met Javier.

Another episode and now your feet were on his lap. His arms draped over your legs, he tugged at the loose thread on your jeans and you wondered what it would be like to make breakfast for dinner together.

But when you checked your phone it was 1am, so you knew it was time to leave. Your turn to walk up to the line and then step back, a glance over your shoulder when you stood.

“Bedtime,” you said, lifting your phone with the uber app open.

“Yeah,” he stood, a nod when he scratched the back of his neck. “You’re good to Uber?”

“Yeah,” you headed for the coat rack by his front door and plucked yours off of a hook. “Thanks for letting me hang out,” you joked, smiled at him when he rolled his eyes.

“Like I was gonna kick you out,” he laughed.

“I’ll see you at work,” you had a hand on the doorknob.

He nodded, like he respected your choice to leave, like he liked the way you said it.

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AN: the....second....to last.....chappie? Hope you've all had a wonderful week, can't wait to share the final chapter with you (but fair warning that I'm still writing it so don't expect it before October :) Let me know what you think!!!!!

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