i am overwhelmed and i just want everything to stop. just stop. just for a moment so i can think, so i can cry, so i can mourn but its so difficult because life just keeps going and my issues are piling on top of each other and suffocating me and i am so overwhelmed that i cant breathe. i hate this.

no matter what i always find a way back to my own self-destruction

ee

the worst thing is that i dont want to get better. i dont want to recover. i need to get worse. i was worse, why am i better? i dont want to. im not sick enough. i want to sh. i want to stop therapy. i want to stop taking meds. i want to destroy myself completely. i need to destroy myself completely.

but why? i should want to get better. why am i like this? what is wrong with me?

*Minor inconvenience, mood shift or emotional episode happens *

My thighs :

Fighting demons not to fucking $l1✝️ my wrist rn

They all assume I'm safe here in my room.

i really wanna cvt my arms but my mom knows and will check 😞any tips on making it less obvious???

I can’t breathe. It feels like I’m suffocating in the sea of my problems. I don’t feel real, im numb.

I’m drowning and nothings helping. Not cutting, not starving. Nothing.

I want help but I don’t know what help looks like. I need everything yet want nothing.

I feel I deserve this but I couldn’t wish more for it to end.

I’m slowly killing myself.

punish yourself for the evil things you've done to yourself 🗡

When Kelsea Ballerini said “I’m blowing up my life but I’m standing by the crater” I’ve never felt the self-destructive, control-freak tendencies inside me screaming more in laughter of finally being acknowledged!

Just thought I’d leave this here. I know I’m not the only one.

Fresh cuts feels amazing

I need to stop eating I need to stop feeling I need to stop thinking I'm good enough for anyone to love me I need to stop being so delusional I need to stop being so desperate I need to fade away and be erased from everyone's memory

it makes me sad how many minors are in the ed community :(. i am sorry you went through whatever brought you here and it’s never too late to get help whether you are pro ana or not. you are beautiful, you will reach your gw, you will be able to look good in those clothes. never doubt yourself or your abilities.

Mixed the whiskey and the hydroxyzine. I'm completely out of whiskey and money. Now I'm just fucking tired and dizzy. I only had two pills left anyway, my mom controls them because otherwise I would have taken a fuck ton more.