Tumgik
#really just mostly showing him memes or news about the shows we both watched/enjoyed
blackandblueraven · 8 months
Text
My friend gave me for my birthday a heat changing mug... so I made him pins with his favourite character for his birthday.
0 notes
aoioozora · 6 months
Text
Liu Kang Tries Earthrealm Activities: The Karaoke.
Characters: Liu Kang, Johnny Cage
Content: singing, joking, memes, friendly LK and JC interactions
Photo credit: your mom
Note: Idk if anyone has done this before, but I thought it would be funny lol. Enjoy!
Tumblr media
“Hey Liu Kang! We should totally go to the karaoke!” Johnny Cage exclaimed, barging into the room Liu Kang was in. 
The fire god, not quite bothered by the disruption, patiently looked up from the scroll he was reading and stared at confusion at the actor, trying to process what he just said. 
“What's a karaoke, Johnny Cage?” Liu Kang asked innocently, his glowing eyes gleaming with interest. 
Johnny was about to look at the god with a “are you kidding me bruh?” look, but remembered that Liu Kang was a deity and wasn't fully familiar with Earthrealmer activities. 
“You wanna find out?” asked Johnny, slapping his chest, puffed both with muscle and mostly pride, “Because,” he now sang, raising his arm in the air and slowly swiping it across him, “I can show you the world,” 
Liu Kang, not understanding the reference and taking it literally, smiled. “And I created this world,” he said. 
Johnny clicked his tongue at the other's incompetence in matters of cultural importance. “You say that, but know nothing of what Earthrealmers do in their spare time.” He taunted with a playful smirk. 
Liu Kang smiled again. “That's why I can count on you to help me.”
Johnny laughed. “You came to the right person! Now, off to the karaoke we go!” 
As the two men went, with Johnny leading, Liu Kang silently pondered and was intrigued by this strange sounding place that Johnny was so excited about. When they reached, Johnny booked a room for two hours and before they knew it, they were in a dark room with disco lights and a glittering above, a computer, and television screen. Across the television sat two couches and a table. 
“Well?” asked Johnny, motioning at the room, “What do you think?”
Liu Kang stared confusedly at the room. He had seen all these things separately before, but all of them put together in one room made him wonder how they all worked together. Johnny, seeing his companion's reaction, brought him inside and showed him the ropes. 
Johnny first chose a song; International Love seemed to be his first choice, since a video with the song and his face went viral on the socials, causing the song to be his unofficial theme song. 
“You put it down like New York City! I never sleep! Wild like Los Angeles, my fantasy!”
Liu Kang watched carefully as Johnny sang his heart out and busted out some of his favorite dance moves. The disco lights went crazy on their own, and even in this high strung environment, he was calmly observing the modus operandi of a “karaoke session”. 
When Johnny finished singing, he let out a heavy, but satisfied sigh and handed the mic to Liu Kang.  “Your turn.” he said.
Liu Kang looked curiously at the object Johnny was handing him and remembered that it was a microphone which was handy in amplifying one's voice. He took it, and then looked through the computer screen in front of him, looking at the vast array of songs, none of which he knew. 
After looking in vain for a song he knew, he asked, “Do they have Chinese songs?” 
“Yeah! They got songs in all languages!” Johnny exclaimed and then showed Liu Kang where to find them. 
When Liu Kang saw his native tongue on the screen, he felt at ease, and now put his all into searching for a good song. A lot of them looked like modern songs that hardly made sense to him, but one of them, an old song, caught his eye. 
He declared he would sing it and stood up in front of the television screen where the lyrics were now showing up. 
“Liu Kang! Liu Kang! Liu Kang!” Johnny cheered with a woop, egging him on to start singing. 
He soon did, and Johnny was pleasantly surprised by the fact that Liu Kang's voice was so melodious and soulful. When he had thought of it, he had never really heard Liu Kang sing before. 
Just as Johnny felt like he heard this song somewhere, Liu Kang sang the chorus with passionately, 
“Xuě huā piāo piāo běi fēng xiāo xiāo, tiāndì yīpiàn cāngmáng,”
Johnny chuckled, immediately recognising it. 
When Liu Kang finished his soulful number, Johnny asked him if it was his favorite song. 
“Of course it is. There are very few songs I enjoy and this is one of them.” answered Liu Kang with a wide grin, feeling ecstatic after singing. 
“I've a request for you to sing. It's also a Chinese song.” said Johnny with a mischievous smirk. 
Liu Kang, happy to sing some more, eagerly asked Johnny which song he had in mind. Johnny had to keep himself from laughing as he made Liu Kang listen to it on his phone first. 
“This is a good song! The singer is so kind as to make a song for sad people to feel happy again. Excellent choice, Johnny Cage.” Liu Kang said approvingly. “I didn't know you liked Chinese songs.” 
Johnny flashed an amused smirk, lying straight through his teeth, “Yeah, my recent obsession. I gotta promote my movies in China too, so, I gotta learn Chinese to up my social credits.” he shrugged, smiling. “You got the tune down?” 
“Yes, I think I can sing it.”
He started singing the first stanza, and Johnny sat with feverish excitement for his favorite part of the song to come. 
“Má hái guăn tā gàn má xīn lĭ yào jì de,”
Johnny smirked. It was coming. 
Liu Kang took a deep breath and started singing the chorus. 
“Nĭ shì nèi nèi gè nèi nèi, nèi gè nèi gè nèi gè nèi nèi,”
Johnny lost it. He started laughing hysterically, even falling over on the couch, holding his sides. 
Liu Kang, startled by Johnny's sudden laughter, stopped singing. By this time, Johnny was wheezing, laughing, and coughing all at once. The singer's confusion and concern only added to the other's hysterics. 
“Johnny Cage, why are you laughing?” demanded Liu Kang, now slightly annoyed. 
“It's nothing!” Johnny said through his coughs as he wiped the tears from his eyes, still chuckling. 
“Tell me why.” 
“Ain't nothing but a heartache!” Johnny returned, his hysterics starting again, now louder than the music. 
Liu Kang looked on, his confusion growing by the second. “Did I sing badly?” he asked. 
“No! No, no, you didn't.” Johnny coughed repeatedly. “I just remembered something funny.”
“I want to know what it is.” insisted Liu Kang. 
“Nah, I'm not telling you.” resisted Johnny. He was definitely not yet going to tell him that whatever he was singing sounded like a certain racial slur that started with the letter "n". He wanted to laugh at Liu Kang's innocence a little longer before revealing the truth.
Liu Kang sighed, deciding it wasn't worth his time to know. He was more interested in singing, and continued where he left off. 
When the two hours were up, the two left the karaoke center. 
“So, I see you had fun.” quipped Johnny in a slightly hoarse voice.
“I had the most splendid time, Johnny Cage. Thank you for showing me what a karaoke is.”
“Would you do it again?” 
“Indeed, I would.”
Johnny smirked. “Now let's get some bing chilling!”
“Bing chilling?” Liu Kang looked with confusion at his companion once again, before realising what he said. “You mean bīng qílín, if you're talking about ice cream.” he corrected, “Johnny Cage, your accent and pronunciation are awful. If you're going to promote in China, you should do better.”
“Okay, okay,” Johnny groaned loudly, making a mental note to teach Liu Kang about memes later. 
End.
My other MK fanfiction:
🌸 Johnny Cage sings you to sleep
🌸 Kenshi does your hair
33 notes · View notes
fountainpenguin · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media
"There's really just one thing that we have in common; neither of us will be missed..." (x)
---
New Dog's Life chapter today!
Chapter 2 - “Embers (Impulse)”
Read on AO3
Start from Chapter 1
---
Impulse is allowed to be POV character for both the pre-game and the rules chapters, not because I split the opening in several pieces but because he specifically can do whatever he wants <3
Dog's Life doesn't have a boogeyman, but it sure has hunting hounds! Grian's got rules to explain, everybody scrambles, folks start taking on mob traits, and Impulse gets his quarry roll. Check it out!
(First 1,000 words under the cut)
---
[ImpulseSV - Player]
Quarry: TBA
Hunter: Unknown
💚  💛  ❤️
Seed 125. It's such an innocuous number, that. Just a sliver of a thing. You could almost personify it like a little fairy. What's that TV show where the letters of the alphabet form words and come alive? If there's a spin-off for numbers, this is exactly that. The number 125 is too ridiculously quaint and pretty to be "randomly selected," which makes it feel ethereal and fey. Does that make sense?
Listen to me. I really do sound like a guy whose friend group has been mostly other parents for the last dozen years.
Smajor gets it, though. Er… Scott. He's all-in on the freckly, pointy eared woodland fey aesthetic this time around- glittery and mystical with iridescent white fairy wings printed down the back of his bright green jacket. Someone call the Summer Court, because Tam Lin's in big trouble. That's him.
You know, just the name alone is hilarious. "Seed 125" sounds like a tourist trap or government lab, like Area 51 or something (at least in all the memes). The air here is warm and smells of salt and mucky sand. It's night, but no one's shivering… even those among the crowd of 17 (like Impulse) whose base code currently depicts them in shorts and a T-shirt. Skizz's suit vest doesn't even have sleeves. Cleo has her arms crossed, hands running up and down her skin, but she sort of always does that. You know: stands off to one side, watchful and aloof. Then she settles with a fwump on the edge of Ren's melon.
(Funny story about the staring. 16 of the 17 players gathered around the melon circle are tailed by "ghosts." They're not normally spoken of- invisible to each other's camera eyes, here only if you squint. HumanCleo betrays all the emotions of life and fear that ZombieCleo does not. The ghostly figure shivers, shifting from foot to foot. She presses her palms to her face. She's transparent, so it does very little to hide her. Impulse can see her beady camera eye staring blearily at the bedrock ground.)
Tango's red-blond hair flickers in the dark. His flames burn low. Since their center torch is pretty pathetic, he alone is lighting up the darkness of their inner circle. Well… Skizz has his halo and Scar decorated his cane with a glowing red orb, which rests in his lap, but there's no telling what that's about. Impulse squints.
Is Scar made of wood?
That'll be interesting. Scar always goes overboard with his skin swaps and roleplay in the death games, and clearly he's already built the bare bones of a plan. Doesn't wood rot near the seaside? This is the seaside, right? Slight waves slap against the shore down the hill from where they sit. Stalks of bamboo leer over them like skyscrapers and the bedrock Grian admin'd in around spawn is freckled with roaming pigs.
Seed 125 is too pretty of a place to be brutally murdered in a death loop. And this time, the realization of that cuts Impulse to the core. He jolts upright, gripping the edges of his melon chair.
Why are we doing all this? For the 'entertainment' of those whose faces we never see? Can't we just have a beach episode and enjoy building together in a tropical survival paradise?
Would that be good content? Maybe not, but it'd be a well-deserved vacation. Impulse rubs behind his neck, tracing out the ghosts of old scars and the ache of this morning's Skyblock stream with Skizz. Ooh. Is he really up for this?
I really shouldn't have spent an hour skimming through the void.
His cam twin moves instinctively to rub his shoulders. His misty hands pass straight through.
"So Grian," Scar calls, cupping his hands around his mouth. "Explain to us in your soothing British accent what the rules of this Life game are."
"Welcome to Dog's Life," Grian recites, spinning around like a king. He wobbles his arms, leaning his weight on just one leg. Gets his balance back. Exhales. They're all standing on random melons gathered around the bedrock spawn point, although there weren't enough for everyone, so some are on the ground. Actually, Smajor (Scott) and BigB have their arms wrapped around each other, tongues poking out uncertainly as they fight gravity and each other to keep themselves upright. Scott, a little squashed and frumpy, looks like he might step down in a second or two. While their melon is square, it's a little lumpy on one side. BigB grips Scott like a life preserver as though the grass is lava.
Beside them is Mumbo, fiddling with his tie. He stares at his shoes, but lifts his gaze as Impulse's eyes bear into him. This is only Mumbo's second round in the death game, so it's no wonder he's nervous. He looks out of his element - like a dolphin in Arizona - like he's debating if he ought to surrender his own melon to one of the senior players. Impulse tries to smile, but it comes out like a grimace. Mumbo fidgets with the hems of his coat. The skeletons on the fringes of their circle are noisy, bones clicking. Pigs snort. The zombies are the loudest of all… enough to make Impulse wonder whether they're standing just above a cave. How grateful he is for the bedrock that prevents death loops from trapping spawn.
One skeleton twists around, making Mumbo jump. But Ren shoots him a reassuring look, waving a dismissive hand. He's sitting on his melon, one leg crossed over the other. He looks relaxed. Cleo's doing the exact same thing, having apparently decided - quite stubbornly - that they won't stray far from spawn while the stars are out. They're in no rush to get moving.
Can't blame her, Impulse thinks, watching the skeleton keep its distance. He taps his fingers against the melon's side, starting up a beat (Skizz instinctively picks it up, drumming too). There's almost no point in foraging at night during Hardcore.
[Cnt'd on AO3 - Link at top]
3 notes · View notes
kuwdoravids · 1 year
Text
Year End Vid Review: 2022
Year-end round-up/meme: 2007 | 2008 | 2009 | 2010 | 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021 | 2022
March Memory Leak (tumblr) (The Matrix Resurrections, Neo, Neo/Trinity)
June Come Back For You (tumblr) (The Witcher, Istredd) Wild Green Yonder (tumblr) (Shrek/Witcher, Shrek/Fiona/Donkey, Geralt/Yen/Jaskier)
August Control (tumblr) (The Witcher, Ciri)
November Brother (tumblr) (The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt. Geralt, Eskel, Lambert, Vesemir)
Read the meme questions beneath the cut!
Random process notes:
I actually made 4 vids this year. "Brother" I made in 2021 and just didn’t post until 2022. But I gotta have Brother show up somewhere in one of my vid review lists so here it is.
4 vids in one year is the fewest vid I made since 2022 and 2018 but that’s mostly because I’ve had like, four mental breakdowns and have been hyper fixating on writing Witcher fic so I did not finish as many vids as I usually do. I didn’t even start that many new vids either.
Overall thoughts:
All of the vids except one are Witcher related. The non-witcher vid is Matrix Resurrections which was more of a soul statement vid that I got to make about the themes of the movie and mental illness.
My Witcher hyperfixation remains strong. I’m very pleased with all the vids I finished and started this year. They’re all quite different, musically and different characters, too. It was a good vidding year even if I didn’t finish a few other projects before December closed out.
Favorite Vid:
Come Back For You. I fucking adore Istredd and Royce Pierreson’s face is so lovely. This vid is all about the vibes for me, but I really enjoyed playing with the visual cues in this—Istredd sitting/transitioned into the monolith, the shadow puppets/Yen and Istredd, so on and so forth. It was a delight to cram all my Yen/Istredd and Geralt/Istredd feelings in here while also managing to touch upon the scholarly aspect of his character since we got a few great scenes with him in season 2.
Hardest to make:
Memory Leak. I had the bulk of this made in about a week in January but I got stalled out in the last 25% of the vid because I couldn’t figure out the flow. But I took some time away from the vid and was able to come back with fresh eyes and manage to finish it in time for VidUKon.
Most successful:
Memory Leak. I was able to accomplish everything I wanted to do with this vid- touch upon the visual narrative of the past/present/reality, showcase Neo’s yearning for love and surviving through the psychological torture he’s been under for decades. And I was able to do that with a very specific song choice—Albert Salt’s cover of Blink182’s “Adam Song” remains one of my most favorite covers I’ve worked with. It does wonders for this vid. I’m so proud of it. And I had a blast watching folks lose their minds while watching the vid at the convention, too! So much joy.
My best vid:
Wild Green Yonder. Aka the Shrek/Witcher crossover that people have gif’ed but I watched all 4 Shrek films and was delighted to discover even more parallels. Everything about this vid is everything I wanted—the joy, the squee, the parallels. The surprises. It really is my best this year.
Most fun vid:
Wild Green Yonder. Not only is using Joey Batey’s music from The Amazing Devil great but the very specific fantasy tropes that happen in both Shrek and Witcher is just so goddamn fun to play with. Especially when it came to Geralt fishing the djinn out of the water for his wish and Shrek trying to also get his wish for everything to go back to normal. I adored playing with the internal motion and eyeline of the characters so that it appeared Shrek was looking at Jaskier and Fiona was smiling at Geralt in bed.
I just wanted to escalate my squee because I really enjoy this trio dynamic a lot and it is my happy place. And I am sure that anyone who watches this can feel the fun!
Also it’s my hope that everyone who watches comes away shipping Fiona/Donkey because the Yen/Jaskier parallels were SO FUN.
Things I learned in 2022:
The more that I write, the less that I spend time vidding. Simple as that. I had a few other vids I wanted to finish in 2022 but my brain meltdowns and anxiety made it hard to follow through.
That being said, I also learned that it is a lot of fun to keep chasing my Witcher joy.
In 2023:
I want to finish my Moonhaven vid and probably start my season 2 Witcher vid and probably a Witcher Blood Origin thing that all of 13 people will watch but it’s what I want to make so that’s how it’ll be. I have a few ideas here and there that I might tackle but it really is a matter of how much anxiety brain I can stifle to focus long enough for clipping again.
I also keep meaning to archive the rest of my catalog on AO3 and Tumblr, so that’s something I am going to attempt to do over the coming year. Over 200 vids to go…
2 notes · View notes
snowyhybridboi · 4 months
Text
GET TO KNOW THE MUN
Tumblr media
NAME?: Not Important
PRONOUNS?: She/Her/They/Them
PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION?: Direct messages here. I can give you my Discord if you'd prefer only if you really want to talk there instead. If it's easier for you.
MOST ACTIVE MUSE(S)?: Probably Charlie? He is my most popular I think. I don't really write with many people though. I'm always happy to bring the other two muses out and watch them grow though!
EXPERIENCE / HOW MANY YEARS?: I think I started writing in 2008? So.. if my math is right, it's been about 16 years. I have improved greatly but I know there's still room for improvement even now.
BEST EXPERIENCE?: I don't think I've had an experience that I would say is the best one. I have met some good people in this community. I appreciate all the patience people have shown me and just the kindness that has overwhelmed the rudeness I've encountered. I am just so happy to be part of such a kind and creative and inspiring community.
RP PET PEEVES?: Dry responses will always irk me. Oh my gosh. If you want to have a conversation, one liners is not the way to do it. Come on now, you have to give people something to work with.
FLUFF, ANGST, OR SMUT?: It's been a very long time since I've written smut so... :/ I'm open to giving it a shot but I am not confident in my abilities to write it. I'll write it but I am going to ask for a ton of patience on that. Fluff and Angst are a must for me though. Gotta gave it sprinkled in the plots, or else it gets stale for me.
PLOTS OR MEMES?: Both! I'm open to both.
LONG OR SHORT REPLIES?: Medium? I don't want novel posts because they intimidate me but give me at least a paragraph or two to start off. I understand that sometimes we have a huge creativity spike and write a ton, and that's completely okay because it happens to all of us. However, I don't expect a novel post from people every single response. Minimum of two paragraphs please.
TIME TO WRITE?: I'm looking for work and I do have chores around the house to do. My father is sick and has many appointments so sometimes I go with him. Sometimes I go with my mother to her appointments. I'm not extremely busy, but I can't be glued to my computer either. I try my best to check in daily.
ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S)?: Yes! Sorta. Mostly like Charlie. We are both sorta blind. (Needing glasses) Both scared of the dark, both can't see at all in the dark unless we have a light to show us the way.. he is more religious than I am in some aspects. We are both short beans. Very... childish? I sorta made him have bits of me that I enjoy. Genevieve and I don't have much in common other than being females. We're Naive? So is Charlie though. Ping is more... outgoing than I am. He loves meeting people, learning new things, being a goofball and getting in trouble. He is the opposite of me. I love them all though.
Tagged By: @okajibana
Tagging: @hellslittleprince @elysiumxii @starsmaligned @secretxxpaladaiseu
1 note · View note
delicrieux · 3 years
Text
☆ミ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”
PART 10: BIG DICK IS BACK IN TOWN
y/n is back in brooklyn for the holidays. thinking that a stream will make her feel less homesick for cali, she starts working on her famously titled hentai.free.srv. what was supposed to be a relaxing stream turns into a special delivery about two hours in.
─── corpse husband x reader ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 2.2k ─── ❥ req: Here's one... You know those apps for delivery like Domino's or whatnot... What if reader is streaming Among Us with Corpse, and reader mentions they're hungry and Corpse offers to order them food, and readers like no no it's fine... Then there's delivery at the door (Corpse ordered beforehand) 
author’s note: fucky format is also back in town baby!!! also if you find any mistakes - no u didnt <3 thank u everyone for enjoying this story sm i literally cant believe how feral yall going strawberry cow was a nuclear explosion im still recovering tbh. got an ask a while ago and decided to incorporate it into myso. happy holidays everyone! myso will continue on monday!
ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous.  ҉   next.
✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼
Tumblr media Tumblr media
✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼
Indeed, being soft on any social media platform was the biggest disgrace and needed to be eliminated post haste. Moreover, it was a slippery slope - once you start flooding your timeline with cute imagery and heart emojis, what will stop you from posting inspirational Facebook quotes? Disgusting. If Rae were here, she would chide you (not you thinking about her as if she’s dead or something). For once in your life, you feel like you deserve it. 
Alas, you hope this little chaos you’ve caused is enough to throw everyone off. The stans, especially. You know the hashtags, you’ve seen ARMY scourging for info online with the same fervor and ruthlessness 1 Direction fans hacked airport security cameras just to spy on the boys. If you had any dirty secrets online, they are out to the public now - thankfully, besides the Harry Styles stan account (with edits and all), you have nothing. Though, now that you think about it, exposed nudes would have been better than your Punk!Harry edit receiving almost a million views. God, your life’s a fucking mess.
Your fans aren’t the only ones out for info - you, too, are trying to decipher Rae’s message. Code: Barbecue Sauce. The two of you had come up with it roughly two years ago, around the same time when you promised that if you didn’t find significant others by the time you’re 40, you’ll just marry each other. It was one of the many rules found in your friendship codex. Barbecue Sauce signifies information - an exchange of information. And depending on how it ends or begins (”So I’m sitting there” alludes to Rae, “On my titties” alludes to you), secret data on that person is given away, usually free of charge. 
But why? And to whom did Rae give away what? You had pestered her mercilessly and even sent some voice messages where you were crying. You were only crying because of a video of a grandpa smiling you saw on TikTok, but you are a snake, and so you put those tears to good use. If streaming doesn’t work out, you’ll just become an actress. Hollywood would love you. Your PR firm sure as fuck wouldn’t, though.
Rae was having none of it. She said you’ll figure it out eventually. Told you to channel your superior puzzle skills. You were quick to remind her that you can barely count to ten without having an aneurysm. Oddly serious, she admitted that she worries for you sometimes. Why only sometimes?! you demanded. She merely sighed. uttering under her breath something that sounded closely to “Boke.”
You leave her for barely a week and she’s already neck deep in the gay volleyball anime, hoodie and cardboard cutout and everything. Your life is falling apart.
But Brooklyn is nice. It had snowed when you stepped off of the plane. Thousands of snowflakes sprinkling into your hair, dotting your cheeks and nose. You missed this sight back in Cali. You missed your parents, too. 
Home cooked meals, old sweaters, your old room and about 40GB worth of old high school pictures on your computer. You went through them all one night. Some were stomach churning, cringe inducing nightmares. You were especially fond of those. Texted some of your friends that were still in Brooklyn, met up, decided to bake. Bad idea, Rae was the resident chef back in Cali. Besides laughing till your stomach hurt, and almost burning down your kitchen, nothing all that significant happened. Somewhere down the line, at about 3 am, half-way through a cheesy rom-com you had the overwhelming urge to text Corpse.
That’s where the problems really started. God, you missed California, missed being in the same timezone with a guy you hadn’t even met yet, how embarrassing is that?! You missed skating around and taking pictures of the beach in the setting sun, sending it to him, silently wishing he was with you to admire the view. 
You really want to call him. And to hang out with him. But for some reason, the thought of that springs up immediate anxiety and you shy away from asking. Him sending you cute good morning texts doesn’t help, either. Maybe it’s better he doesn’t know that you’re a blushing, stuttering mess each time you read “baby”. 
Late evening. Your stream is already set up, people are slowly trickling in and you greet them with a grin and a soft “Hello! Hi hi!”. You did your best to make your room a perfectly chaotic backdrop - led lights, an embarrassing amount of anime merch and plushies. You always try to balance out your weeb side by dressing hot as fuck for your streams - today’s inspiration just so happens to be egirls. Mostly because you watched one too many egirl make-up tutorials on TikTok, and also because you’ve been listening to Corpse’s song all day.
Yeah, no, who are you kidding, you dressed up this way because you were hoping Corpse was watching your stream. You didn’t forget your cat headphones, either. You know he likes them. You want to make him suffer. Perhaps then, finally, he will ask you out, so you wouldn’t have to.
✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼
Tumblr media
✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼
“I feel like,” You start when you put away your phone, staring idly at the chat, “I feel like I need a new name for you guys. Calling you guys after two years of streaming is just... weird, no? I also don’t respect men so I don’t want to call you guys. Like, so many creator’s have, like, a name for their fans. Uhm, Cody Ko has the chodesters, Kurtis Conner has, uh, folks? Kurtis Town? Citizens! Markiplier has mommy issues--” You can’t help snorting, “So, I’ve been, like, thinking - I know, shocking! - so I was thinking I’m gonna name you cockroaches. Because you’re grimy little shits impossible to kill. And also then I can use the legendary Minaj meme ROACHES!”
Your stream enthusiastically echoes ROACHES, making the chat swim. Yes, if anyone would enjoy such a name, it would be your audience. You’re as equally proud as you are disturbed.
“Well, anyway.” Leaning back into your chair, you throw your arms out with a bright grin, “Big dick is back in town, baby! If you noticed the backdrops different, it’s cuz I’m in Brooklyn now. Don’t ask me when I will return to Always Sunny, I don’t plan that far ahead.”
While Minecraft boots up, you decide to answer a few questions.
r u dating sykkuno?
You want to smack your head into the keyboard, but as it is, you can’t exactly afford a new one, so you refrain, “No, Sykkuno and I are not dating, we are just good friends. Uhm, I’m not sure how much I’ll have to repeat this, but, we really aren’t, so if the roaches could chill - Oh my God, that sounds so stupid, I love it - uh, yeah, if the roaches could chill that’d be great.”
the roaches lmao sounds like we’re a sports team
“Oh shit, yeah it does, uh-- maybe I can make like, jerseys or something. That’d be cool, I think.”
how disappointed are your parents with the way your life turned out?
“My parents are actually not disappointed at all!” You say with a cute little smile, “Uhm, they’re both really proud, actually. They’re glad I found something I love doing and made a job outta it. Dad finds my Youtube videos endearing. Yes, they watch pretty much all of my videos, unless I explicitly tell them not to. And yeah, with all the fucks and thirsting for anime characters. Uhm, it was very embarrassing at first, but I mean, after a while, shame just...doesn’t exist anymore, I guess? Funny thing about my parents, actually, when they watch my videos-” You eye catches a comment, “Oh! No, they only watch my Youtube videos. They don’t know how to use Twitter, thank God. Uhm, anyway-- when they hear a name they don’t know, like, I dunno, Dabi, or something, they google--” You’re grinning by now, eyes crinkling, giggling softly, “--who that is, and buy me like, merch and stuff. It’s really cute. 
can i be adopted by ur parents plz
will you and corpse ever collab?!
You were about to answer, though the man of the hour himself decides to do it for you.
Corpse_Husband: yes.
Okay, not to say your heart skipped a beat, but it totally did. With a pleased smile, you nod, like one of those bobble head toys sold at the dollar store. The motion is oddly reminiscent of Sykkuno’s own nod. Perhaps you had picked it up from him. The chat seems to notice.
pack it up, sykkuno
More questions pile about this mysterious collab you and Corpse are planning. Yeah, you’d like to hear more about it, too, since he single highhandedly decided one was happening right now. Corpse remains silent. Fine, keep your secrets. 
“Okay, guys, oh, I mean, roaches, Oh my God--” You’re covering your mouth, giggling, “-calling all roaches, calling all roaches, calm down. Everyone grab a snack and a blanket I’m turning up the music volume so we can all chill. Entering chill zone. Entering chill zone. Roaches, prepare.”
we are prepared
✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼
An hour or so passes and you grow hungry. It shows with the amount of cakes you had baked in your server. Currently, you find yourself throwing eggs at the wall of one of the renovated houses, your face scrunched in concentration and slight frustration. 24 of the 50 eggs have been wasted. “What’s a girl gotta do to get some chicks around here?” you had uttered under your breath, until, finally, a screech - the egg finally spawns a mob. Your mouth falls open, “Aww, look!” You approach it, so small, walking in zigzags beside you, “It’s a baby chicken! Die, bitch.” The baby chicken is no more as you swing your bedazzled (you have mods) diamond sword. You’re cackling by the time the dust settles.
y/n is a child murderer
“Roaches,” You address your fan-base, spurring another fit of laughter - you can’t get over the name, “I think I’m like, forgetting that eating in Minecraft won’t actually make less hungry in real life.”
take a break and go eat queen <3
“Fuck no, we starve and die like men. Now I actually really need another chicken.”
Another twenty minutes trickle by and you’re trying to lure back a panda from the jungle when there’s a knock on your bedroom’s door. Whipping your head to the side, you slide down your headphones. At the same time, your mom pokes her head through the ajar door, “MOM!” You scream, “Get OUT of my room I’m playing Minecraft!” But your yell has no actual bite to it, as you don’t manage to hide your smile. Your mom laughs, doing some sort of sign language and motioning for you to follow her with her head. That or it’s some sort of performative dance. 
“I’m live right now,” You tell her, pointing at your screen. She knows this already, though, “do you want to say hi?” 
The roaches spam the chat with friendly hellos. You mom, quite impatient now, waves you over. 
“Sorry, roaches, mom needs something. Be back in a bit!”
Stopping the stream, you rush out of your seat and pleased she slinks into the hallway. “What’s this about?”
“Your pizza came.”
“My what now?” You echo, confused.
“Domino’s. You ordered pizza?”
“What? No? I was busy with the stream, I never--”
Thankfully, you had managed to grab your phone from your room before you exited. You almost choke on spit once you read the messages.
✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼
You decide that it’ll be impossible to stream after experiencing what you had just experienced. You tweet out a quick apology to the roaches (God, that fucking name) and say that you had a breakdown but you’re okay. That is as a close to the truth as you managed to muster. It’s a sad sight, chewing and crying; your mom winced when she saw your state - disheveled hair and rundown eyeliner and everything. “D’aww,” She had muttered, caressing the top of your head, “don’t cry my little raccoon.”
If anyone was ever to ask you where did your chaotic nature come from, you’d answer with my mom. To make yourself feel better, you took a selfie - duck face and peace sign and the horrible 2000′s angle. Sent it to Rae. 
looking hot, her message read. 
thanks, was all you replied with.
You couldn’t just leave things as they were. Once you calmed down, you wanted to text Corpse, but how would you follow up the ungodly caps lock and screeching? Impossible. An idea sprung to mind, one that was brave. Taking the first step.
Instead of sending a text, you sent a voice memo.
“Thank you for the pizza, it was delicious.”
You voice still sounded a bit raspy. His reply was instant. Your heart skipped a beat. He sent a voice memo back.
“Glad you liked it, baby.”
He was going to be the death of you.
✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼  ҉  ✼
tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @slashersdream - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai - @truly-dionysus - @multi-fandom-central707
more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙
2K notes · View notes
sugar-petals · 3 years
Note
can you give us more thoughts about domestic yoongles? the taemin's one (wich I love) just made me miss the cat boy so much ;o;
i have a phd in househusband yoongi so let me fire out some ideas for ya.
myg at home headcanon
🐱 word count. 1.9k | fluff, slice of life, slight nsfw mentions, x reader, bullet points
Tumblr media
The doorbell sound is a recording of Yoongi imitating a doorbell. He’s such a meme. Ceci n'est pas une pipe.
Seemingly, he teaches himself a new recipe every week. To perfection. Yoongi is very particular about sticking to the recipe and wielding his kitchen tools in the right way. He collects knives, olive oil, and still hates cutting onions.
He separates sleep time, work time, and couple time as the holy trinity. For each, he switches his mood.
Blushes easily no matter for how long you’ve been together.
Establishes his own radio show where he DJs at one point.
Yoongi keeps an extreme track on the garbage schedule. He knows exactly what is due when. Separating the trash is a must. That includes sorting out fake friends trying to get between your relationship. Your social circle as a couple is extremely deliberate.
Yoongi deems himself a terrible host for guests. Unless Hoseok is there to drag him out, it's true he rather stays in the kitchen or at the barbecue preparing the menu courses rather than making small talk. He leaves the hospitality bits to you, however you want to go about it.
What he lacks in conversing with guests, he makes up in bed, God is absolutely fair.
He sings and hums pretty often and has his own vernacular of extraterrestrial uwu noises. It's an alphabet that you have to yet decipher but it's incredibly cute.
Self-made paintings everywhere around his house. 
Yoongi hasn't gone clubbing since grammar school. The most he does is going to a restaurant at lunch with very close friends. And always in a work context. His private life is so secluded from everything else and paparazzi just don't spot him anywhere, Dispatch thinks he must live abroad.
Very well, he does consider his big ole house a separate country. It's a living organism with a studio, gym, trophy room, small-size basketball court, and vastly equipped kitchen. A home theater as well, he likes American movies (like Inception) and Korean action genres, and you can stream whatever you fancy in there whenever you like. 
Yes, he has underwear with cute little bears on.
There's even a little pond in the backyard. Yoongi, Pisces he is, likes fishes after all. Sometimes he sits at the edge of the 'Little Ole Min Lake (LOML)' and stares into the water for literal hours with his chin parked on his palm.
His fridge is so high-tech and futuristic, even Yoongi is rendered clueless by its AI sometimes. The washing machine, too.
Yoongi watches RuPaul’s drag race. What did you expect? He finds it so humorous.
Owns lord knows how many comic collections.
Favorite holiday destination: New York.
Christmas is basically 50% you unveiling new music equipment to him in the garage and Yoongi almost fainting at the sexiness of it. The other 50% is spent holding hands and orgasm after orgasm until the new year since you loose track of time.
Goes on long rants why he’d marry you again every weekend.
Making you presents is his specialty. Always accompanied with a hand-written note. He writes a lot of things by hand for you in general. Texting, basically never. Always on paper.
No sex without a blanket and socks on. Yoongi gets cold very very easily and just doesn’t like showing skin. You buy him a heated blanket for his birthday, he even uses it in his studio chair.
Chronically addicted to making out.
Matching black outfits and glasses.
Laughs at even your worst jokes or phrases you didn’t expect you even uttered.
Yoongi owns the phoniest, most secretive-looking black car ever and nobody knows about it. Even he forgets he owns it, in fact he genuinely acts like it just doesn’t exist. Hilarious. And that guy has a level 1 Korean driver's license. Which allows him to drive trailers and busses and fucking trucks, and construction machines, let that sink in.
It's really a genius curse. Yoongi being put to the test will always deliver but he won't choose to execute his full skillset if he doesn't have to. Well, pragmatic. He's not as phony as he thinks he is, which is even more hilarious.
He uses that behemoth of a car so scarcely because he'd rather have things delivered to his doorstep and he's stingy with gas. Also, he doesn't like traffic and driving because of the traumatic shoulder accident and his tendency to space out. Translation: You drive that thing... that monster... it really is an impressive, fast, and scary machine. 
If someone devious ever even remotely manages to invade his privacy and get past the doubly-installed security system, he has enough money to deal with it no matter what.
If it concerns your privacy, he's a red belt. And owns Jin's number if a taekwondo master is required. Jimin's if it needs someone with kendo skills.
If Yoongi needs someone to go on a complete rampage, Jungkook lives just down the block. He can sprint to Yoongi's bunker I mean mansion within 45 seconds. 30 if it's very urgent. 20 if the reward is an instant ramen splurge with Yoongi's black card.
He has a sexy, glamorous sword collection hanging on the living room wall anyways, so. Who the hell is dumb enough to mess with him and his expensive lawyer in the first place.
But just in case, who knows... Yoongi settles matters shruggingly, anonymously, and with cash and he's too exhausted for violence, but don't underestimate his deter-min-ation and network for emergencies. Also, he is Agust D after all.
He will bonk a naughty burglar or kidnapper across the head with a wooden cooking spoon or take him down by throwing a basketball if the situation requires it. Damn, his reflexes are so fast, a feral cat in motion. So, lean back and sip on your drink of choice. Things are cared for.
If Yoongi is the one being kidnapped or a highly skilled stalker invades the property at night when he's fast asleep (nothing can wake this man during certain hours, strong REM right here): Don't forget that honeyboy is a Dodgers fan. There are signed baseball bats everywhere in this damn house.
In that sense, your parents visiting you here for the first time thought you were an undercover thug couple. Not to worry mom and dad, you both just like sports very much okay.
Yoongi walks around in all black clothes and the rooms are all seemingly dark. Even if you live together, you don't know his skin care routine. It's clear to you he's some sort of vampire.
Since Yoongi always forgets to remove his makeup, you made it a habit to wipe it down when he's about to pass out. He won't lie, he enjoys that kind of affection.
Holly is your resident child. You're essentially a family.
He insists to tackle this by himself, Yoongi sees his therapist monthly. Not shifting responsibility is something he's stubborn about and he pours his emotions into writing. You will do conversation about deeper stuff, but he says it's mostly up to him and his own mind. He dislikes burdening you or opening up too much and it's something to respect rather than force him about. If he wants to share a thought, he will. It doesn’t mean he can’t trust you or sucks at communicating (we know that he’s direct). Yoongi simply can’t put that much pain in such few words nor should you alleviate it for him.
Calls from the manager faze Yoongi as much as Jimin is bothered by gravity. If he’s busy kissing your body slow mo, who the hell dares to disturb his worship. 
This man had so many let-downs and interpersonal catastrophes in his life, he's super discerning with people. Because he rolls that way, during their first meeting Yoongi uses his psychology certificate on your friends. You see him squint at them, he listens very closely. After they pass the vibe check aka meow radar, he befriends them, too.
Yoongi doodles Grammy trophies everywhere to manifest them.
Yoongi shaves his legs.
All the sex toys he’s ever bought are black. Gotta vibe in style.
He spends ridiculous amounts of time in the studio but he's yours for the remainder of the night, breakfast, and he makes a lavish lunch and dinner.
Um, consider his head parked between your legs. The Hongkong line was not a joke.
Doesn’t mind you squishing his cheeks whenever and for how long you like. 
Every other weekend he gets flowers, vouchers, and gifts — not because of fans, they don’t know where his house is, but because he donates so much.
Namjoon often drops by and cleanses the area with his crystals.
Yoongi is a photography major so you can ask him to take professional, ceiling-high black and white shots of you.
Feeding each other food lovingly. Man, this guy got lips.
He set up a library just for you, in the exact historical aesthetic you like the most. Send him the link to any book you want, it's basically in the online shopping cart already. As I said, he wants to make you presents like every week.
Sometimes he sits on the other end studying English videos and vocab while you read. And yes, he's already 95% fluent but pretends being merely intermediate. He knows technical terms even native speakers have never heard of.
He collects pajamas and earrings.
Swears on the phone.
Namjoon being the horniest member is a cover-up story. Yoongi masturbates almost unreasonable amounts of times, by himself and in your arms when going to bed. Not gonna lie, it’s a sight to see his hands at work. He’s almost equally obsessed with fingering you once you ask him.
Yoongi was the one asking you to move in and almost had a nervous meltdown before meeting up with you to tell you just that. 
He’s the little spoon and of course a sleeping burrito to hold tight.
Finds you equally attractive in any state or styling. Yoongi practices what he preaches, he always reacts the same and says the same. 
Jams out to outrageous beats Namjoon sends him by dancing in the studio. You walk in on him every time. Was embarrassed at first, now you dance along.
Has bought you a life-sized Yoongi pillow and customized you a giant Shooky to hug when he’s not at home over night.
Owned a wine cellar until he quit drinking. Turned it into a piano room instead.
Only you know Yoongi has a serpent and dagger tattoo.
Scrubs the bathroom religiously.
The house smells like restaurant food and his extravagant perfumes half of the time.
Sometimes he has to remind himself he’s married to you and not his coffee machine. He shall be forgiven. You can’t complain that he doesn’t love you enough, nor is he ever not adorable when drinking his latte.
Never wears short sleeves. It can be scorching and he’ll wear a jacket. 
Tell him and the cap stays on during sex.
He grows his hair out and puts it in a low bun. The bangs remain.
Yoongi has installed the most fire-proof building in the entire city it seems. That he wanted to be a firefighter when he was young definitely shows. Figures the house has to be protected from heat: His blasting studio music and Yoongi himself are just way too sizzling.
Still melts into a puddle when you kiss his nose.
Couple sunrise watching. 
© submissive-bangtan 2017-2021. all rights reserved. do not repost or translate. all depictions fictional.
516 notes · View notes
mewberii · 3 years
Text
Streamer!Scaramouche [2]
thanks for all the support in the first part! i wrote a second part where scaramouche plays genshin + the reader comes in (i tried to make it as gender neutral as possible, so let me know if there’s something off!). you’re a close friend of scaramouche and also a voice actor!
i had been planning this since i wrote the first part, but because i was busy and uninspired i couldn’t finish it. but here it is and it’s actually pretty long (over 5k words...)! i hope you guys will like this!! obviously he’s a little nicer than he is in game but,,, for the sake of the plot + it being a modern au, it had to be done sjnfdskjf
Tumblr media
He was selected to play the beta for genshin because of his popularity and tbh he really wanted to play it
The game hadn’t really caught his eye all that much when he first heard about it but he saw how everyone online went crazy over it (plus other streamers who also were selected to play it in early access kept talking about it) and he became more curious to know what it would be like and if it’d live to everyone’s expectations
However he couldn’t really play it until it was officially released because he had a very busy schedule, and when he saw other streams of people playing it he was,,, lowkey jealous because it did look fun
When it was finally released and the game finished downloading and installing, he went live right away
And since so many people were looking forward to seeing him play plus the game was getting so popular so fast, that stream of when he first played hit his biggest milestone of live viewers ever
ANYWAYS skip forward to further into the game
when it comes to the gacha,,,
we’ve established that this boy is loaded. he won’t hesitate to throw some big amounts of money at the game to get every single character and weapon he wants and get their constellations to the max
i feel like he’d make little bets (and it works as a way to thank the chat for the support) like “if i get (insert newest character) in the first 50 pulls, i will gift 50 subs”
he’d be SOOOOOOO LUCKY it’d make everyone who doesn’t play think that it must be very easy to get the 5 stars or that the drop rate must be very high,,,
so in the end he’d have to gift the subs and it’d be funny to see the chat go absolutely crazy because everyone is commenting at the same time trying to see if they got lucky too and got the sub
but the chat goes so fast that they can’t even see their own comment after they send it sNDJGDJSK 
he’d end up turning subs mode on for a while because it goes crazy
and that’s when he’d see people going “I GOT THE SUB-” all excited and he can’t help but chuckle and congratulate them for being one of the lucky ones
probably another game he can use to play with some subs once in a while! they could play co-op and when he’s a very high level he’d go to the worlds of some of his subs with lower level to help them with whatever they need
SO, LITTLE SKIP HERE
this is where i want the reader to slide into the picture
you’d be a voice actor, and also you have been a friend of his for a very long time
he met you even before he started streaming and you were always so supportive of him, as he was of every and each of your dreams
in fact, he would have invited you over more than once to stream with him
people don’t say anything bc they’re afraid of scaramouche banning them (it’s happened before) + they understand it can be disrespectful... but…
some people lowkey ship you two a little bit,,,,,, you didn’t hear it from me. scaramouche don’t ban me----
so one day he’s making another livestream playing genshin (sponsored by mihoyo to promote the newest update and event) and they’re going to release a new character 
AND he has told everyone that you are the voice actor of the new character, who will be introduced in the event and is also getting their own banner
so everyone is very curious of what they’ll be like, if scaramouche will try to get them (obviously he will, he has every single character…. the amount of money he has put into the game…. just thinking of it gives me the heebie-jeebies) 
could he even,,, main them,,,,
spoiler: he won’t because he’ll stay honest till the end (and no hard feelings) but there are other characters that he has built up to the max just like them and still work better with the way he plays but he’ll still find a chance to use them often
he didn’t know anything of what the character you voiced would be like because you wanted to keep it a surprise and he knew his audience would enjoy seeing his first reactions
I think the character you voice in the game would have the role that Scaramouche has in the actual game, and their design would be fairly similar (maybe similar color palette) to the design fans made for him as a genshin character (the one i mentioned that he uses for popup notifs of subscriptions and all!)
needless to say he’d absolutely love their personality and the charisma you showed in their lines
of course when he finally gets them he shows everything about them including all their voice lines and he compliments y/n’s voice acting… that was the first time people suspected that....
mayhaps… scaramouche….
has feelings for you....
it’s in the soft gaze in his eyes,,, the gentle smile on his lips,,, his soft voice when saying “I think this one is my favorite line of theirs”
and just how BRIGHT AND BEAUTIFUL his laugh sounds when someone comments he should invite you and ask you to do that voiceline live for him and everyone else
he’d jokingly reach for his phone and be like “should i call them? i could” 
(but he wouldn’t because he doesn’t want to disturb you, you may be busy, considering you still hadn’t replied to the messages he sent to you before he started the stream a few hours ago)
if anyone dares be mean to you saying you got the chance to voice act for genshin just bc of scaramouche
or implies that he did something to get you there he’ll get quite mad even tho he won’t speak up about it (he might if enough people say it) 
people can see something shift in his gaze,,,, and he bans them permanently right away
it’d be kinda funny when he does those “reading unban requests” streams and he goes past immediately rejecting people who said those kind of stuff, not even reading the apologies JSNKJFNDSJKGNSDK
some people say he’s too strict about it but literally his stream his rules. people who don’t like him should just not watch him
and people who like him should NOT speak badly about you or doubt your talent and effort, which is what brought you that opportunity in the first place
one day he’d be streaming playing the game, he had been using your character and gathering materials to get their last ascension
and at one point he’d grab his phone and look at the screen for a second before putting it back down and saying he had planned something else for tonight besides playing genshin for a while
then, the doorbell would ring (before he could even close the game-) and it’d be heard from his setup room so people in the chat heard it and they’re all like???
it’s definitely not takeout because scaramouche never orders takeout when he’s on his own, he usually cooks for himself and just orders it when he’s with friends and they all feel like eating something different
actually, offtopic, but i have a feeling he’d be very responsible when it comes to food and like he’d cook himself proper meals all perfectly balanced and all- he could afford having someone cook for him but his house = his privacy and personal space so he’d rather do it himself
it’s like, past 10pm, so no way it would be a package or mail at that time
and then he says “we have a visitor tonight”
and then the chat goes crazy saying “CHILDE” “HARBINGERS” but mostly “Y/N!??!?/PLEASE LET IT BE Y/N”
AND IT WAS YOU!!!!
and omg you brought takeout--------
it had been a while since they had seen you in scaramouche’s stream and you didn’t have your own channel (even though there were many people who encouraged you to open one)
SO everyone was very excited
i feel like scaramouche wouldn’t be the biggest fan of eating on camera so you guys would put the food away so that you can eat it later on your own without an audience
and you two would just spend a while talking to the chat, watching videos
AND reviewing fanart and fanmade content together!! it’d be so cute especially fanarts of the two of you together, little animatics or comics of funny clips or memes from his streams of you two,,,
someone made a little felt plushie of the genshin character you voiced and the way you COOED because it was SO cute
only those who were truly paying attention were able to notice the soft smile on scaramouche’s lips and the way he looked at you as you gushed over how cute the little plushie is and how talented the person who made it is!!
also you’d tell him you saw signora make a stream where she talked to some of her fans on discord individually to give them advice on their life/problems (nothing too serious) and it was very funny and you wanted to do that with him someday
and he’s like “that… could be a huge mess. people could say some crazy stuff” and you’re like “NO but i talked to her about it and she said she got her mods to talk to them first and approve them before they moved them up to the channel where she was to talk to her”
and he’s like “still…….. what if people lie and then when they get to talk to us they say something-”
and you’re like “BOY!!!! DO YOU NOT TRUST YOUR FANS *GASP*” and everyone in the chat is also going “GASP” “HE DOESN’T TRUST US…” “IS THIS YOUR IDOL…..?” “SAY SORRY” (all good fun, obviously he’d love to talk to everyone if he could make sure there won’t be anything disrespectful said)
SO!!!!! you two say you’ll plan to do something like that soon and everyone is very excited, they can already tell it’ll be both super cute and hilarious
before he ends the stream, you two watch some videos together
some are about some upcoming videogames and he talks about them and what he knows and explaining things to you... he is.. so knowledgeable…
the way you look at him as he goes into a little rant about it… cinematic parallels with the way he looked at you before
ONCE AGAIN, people aren’t blind. they notice. but they keep it to themselves bc scary scara (the way i had to resist overusing this one joke with his name-)
so the stream ends and you two walk out of the setup room to go to his living room and eat the takeout you brought while watching something on tv
he apologises because the food is cold now, but you brush it off saying it’s ok, you had missed being on his streams and you two can just heat up the food again
he doesn’t look at you in the eyes as he mutters that you know you can join his streams whenever, and instead just says it as he makes his way to the kitchen to heat the food
you join him in the kitchen soon after and tell him you also bought something for dessert and put it in the fridge already before
and honestly he didn’t know how much he wanted to eat that dessert until it was in his fridge, so he can’t stop himself from sighing and saying “god, i love you”
there’s silence for a second, right as the microwave beeps as it finished heating the food
it feels eternal to him, but you immediately started laughing and said jokingly “of course you do! you’re welcome!” 
he’s happy you took it as a joke because that’s not how he planned to confess (he didn’t plan to confess anytime soon in the first place) but at the same time ?? he’s lowkey offended inside because? you took it as a joke?? is it so unrealistic that you wouldn’t even think that he meant it romantically?
it’s at that moment that he realises that if he didn’t want to confess before, now he does.
he wouldn’t want anyone to know about how he let that slip because he’s sure no one in you two’s friend group even knows he likes you
but you,,, actually,,,,, were actually caught off guard too because scaramouche wasn’t precisely one for words of affection and he showed his care for everyone with his actions
in fact, you had never heard him say those words before but well- it was kinda nice- if only he meant it as you feel it- but he couldn’t, right? who’d confess their feelings so casually while looking at a dessert in the fridge with desire-------
that night, it gets pretty late and to be honest he’s a little too tired to drive you home as he usually would, so he asks if you’d like to sleep over
it wouldn’t be your first time doing so, not even the first time you stayed unplanned, and he had a couple guest rooms that you could use so you accepted
also, staying for longer meant you could keep watching some more of that series with him without worrying about it getting late
or,,,
“actually” you said in a low voice, almost a whisper, since it was getting late and you two had been in complete silence while watching the series “i lowkey still wanted to stream some more”
he scoffs but then lets out a short chuckle, replying in the same volume
“it’s past 2am, who’s going to watch me stream now?”
“i would” have mercy for his poor heart- “but i’d be the streamer too this time so it doesn’t count” 
“what even would we do”
“can we play that co-op game you played with childe? it was so much fun” 
had you not brought it up, he wouldn’t have offered that ever because? if he had recently played it with childe he didn’t want to stream it again and make it feel repetitive for his audience 
(jokes on him because when genshin came out they put up with it being the only thing he streamed for over a week. they’d rewatch any game if it’s you two playing it)
but to be honest, he didn’t really want to stream anymore that day and just wanted to be with you, just you and no one else
he got up from the couch and walked towards the hallway, making you look up to him in confusion for a second, but then started getting excited knowing this meant he was going to let you play it with him
“i don’t really feel like streaming anymore today, but we can still play it. let’s go”
the next day, you two wake up around the same time and make breakfast together
scaramouche i feel is not very talkative in the mornings 
in fact, i feel like he’s just not the most talkative in general. he’s more the type to listen, but it’s different during his streams because he’s doing what he loves and talking about what he loves
and when it comes to you and he talks more it’s because he’s talking to who he loves----
before you’re going to leave and you’re standing at the door about to say goodbye to him, he suddenly speaks up before you can
“do you want to go somewhere tomorrow?”
you raise your eyebrows in curiosity from the sudden request, but then smile at him and nod
“yeah sure! what do you have in min-”
“it’s a date” he said, interrupting you, which was weird enough of him (since he would never interrupt you), but his words were even weirder-
“h-huh?” you felt the heat rising to your cheeks, and scaramouche just repeated his words
on the outside, he looked so casual and just, confident- bUT INSIDE he was actually panicking a little bit 
but just a little bit.
After a moment, you smiled at him again, this time somewhat more shily but also excited for your date!
“I look forward to it”
Just with that, you two knew you had made the first step
You weren’t just friends anymore
You two had hung out on your own many times before, in fact and as it was mentioned before, you two had even slept over at his house or yours many times before
but it had all always been purely platonic, and you guys had never even questioned that aspect of it even after realising you had romantic feelings for each other
he’d spend the rest of the day thinking of what you could do the next day, as if he hadn’t been brainstorming for ideas all night either
i feel like he hasn’t gone in many (if not any--) dates before
solely because he has never been interested in romance plus he had never liked someone or at least, not as much as he liked you
and even when he found out he felt something for you, he just always told himself he was okay with how things were, because he’d never experienced anything beyond friendship and didn’t feel the need to try and maybe ruin the friendship
SO he didn’t have many ideas of what a good date could be
he definitely didn’t want a cliché corny date, but he really didn’t have any idea of what was good enough for a date
(and if for future dates you want something he’d consider a “”cliché corny date”” he’d do it for you and actually enjoy it)
the last thing he wanted was to have to ask you what you could do for your date
1- because he didn’t want to show you any side of him that didn’t look like he always has everything under control and he’s always composed (as if you wouldn’t want to see every side of him, even his most vulnerable sides- you’d have to work on that with him when you two become official)
2- he… kind of wanted to surprise you…..
but it really got to the point where he really didn’t know what you’d like the most (or what he’d like the most too) and what he wanted most over anything else is to not disappoint you in you two’s first date
SO he finally texted you asking if there was anything special you wanted to do (and therefore indirectly admitting he……….. just really wanted to ask you out. so much he did it without thinking of what he’d do if you said yes--)
you didn’t seem to mind, and in fact you were happy he asked for your opinion 
overall, scaramouche was very independent so he wasn’t one to ask others for advice, opinions or anything, much less for help regarding anything
“how long has it been since we last went to the arcade? we could go there! i heard from childe that they added new games!”
and he’s like !?!?!?? THAT…. is…….. the perfect idea
“that actually sounds perfect” he admitted, and the message brought a big smile to your face 
“just don’t get mad at me when you lose at all of them” he sent right after, teasing you, and you couldn’t help but let out a laugh out loud
“the last time i won in your favorite game” you reminded him, and even after he read your message, he took a little bit to reply
(he needed a second to put the pieces of his pride together SJNFKJDS)
“don’t get used to it, it won’t happen again”
“we will see about that” the more you two joked like this, the more excited you got thinking about tomorrow
scaramouche was sure now that it’d be a great first date that you’d both remember forever
the next day, it was almost the time for the date and scaramouche was going to pick you up at your house
i feel like scaramouche would be very fashionable and even in his style he doesn’t try to hide that he’s loaded…
not that he cares about buying cheap clothes, literally he’d say if he likes it and it’s good (aka it’s not cheap because it’s made of something that won’t make it last longer than 3 weeks) he’ll get it
but it just so happens that many times… the clothes he likes most are from famous brands…
AND THIS DAY!!!!!! he’s putting together one of his favorite outfits because it’s a special day
it almost hurts me just how nonchalant he’d look on the outside, making it a little hard to know exactly just how much this date meant to him (because as i said he’s not one to be very vocal about his feelings or even his thoughts)
BUT i trust that you… since you know him well…. can see past all that and you know that this is not just anything casual to him. this is special.
STILL!!!! he’d try his best to not let the blush rise to his cheeks and show, as well as to not let his voice shake when he complimented that you looked very good
ANYWAYS i think i think Scaramouche wouldn’t be one for big pda
the most he’d do where anyone can see is hold your hand or put his arm around your waist
WHICH IS WHY he’d try to be all smooth (and he would manage) reaching for your hand and lacing his fingers with yours
he wouldn’t make eye contact because then he’s sure it’ll show on his face that he’s getting somewhat flustered, but he’d still ask if you’re okay with it, to which you said yes
the area where the arcade was is always somewhat crowded so when you two were getting there, scaramouche would tighten the grip on your hand a little bit to make sure you wouldn’t let go and you’d be pulled apart by people trying to walk past however they can
you know that if you two got serious about your relationship, he would want to be the first person to share the news with his fans
BUT since he was so popular now, you two lived in a pretty big city and now were at a popular area (+ scaramouche wouldn’t be the type to try and hide his identity because he’s never had people make a fuss when they recognise him)
you were a little worried someone would see you two and maybe take a picture and post it online and it’d go viral before he can admit it himself
because of that, you end up throwing back to him the question he had asked when he held your hand 
“are you sure this is okay?”
your question confused him because he didn’t know what you mean, so he finally looked you in the eyes and waited for you to explain further
“it’s just- what if somebody sees us and recognises you?”
he looked away from you and back at where he was going, taking a few seconds to answer before he just shrugged
“i don’t care”
you softly let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding as you waited for him to say something, and almost missed the way he whispered
“as long as it doesn’t affect you”
for someone who seemed and actually tried to seem to self-sufficient, who appreciated his friends but was also okay on his own because he was absolutely comfortable with himself, he was actually…
more selfless than people would ever know, especially when it came to you
you two would have SO much fun in the arcade, trying every single game many times
this time though, scaramouche won in his favorite game so he lived up to his words
you two won so many tickets you literally didn’t even know what to do with them once you got the couple prizes you were interested in
you bumped into a couple fans of his, so you talked for a while
once again, you were met with suggestions of opening your own streaming channel, and even scaramouche said “i’ve told them that many times too, but they always say they think their streams won’t be fun enough”
and the fans are like “NO!! literally everyone thinks you’re super nice and fun!! of course you don’t have to if you don’t want to, but we’d love it!!”
one of the fans (exaggerating a little as a joke) said “i’ll be your number 1 fan i swear” and the three of you laughed, except scaramouche who just scoffed and smirked 
“i am ALREADY their number one fan. but good try” <- scaramouche in his head. say it outloud u coward.
but at the same time it was a joke scaramouche chill pretty much everyone knows you’re their number one fan……. even though you think you’re so smooth………. they just don’t say anything 
they were very nice and fun to talk to and you knew scaramouche and you didn’t really want anything else from the prizes, so you offered you two’s tickets to them
“we don’t really need these anymore so maybe you’ll have more use for them!!”
they got SO excited, the way their eyes lit up :( scaramouche is convinced you’re an angel but he’s also very happy to see how joyful his fans got because those were more than enough for the prize they really wanted-
so after that cute little interaction and having used up your energy for competition, you two leave and think of buying some ice cream or a milkshake or something to end the date nicely and to enjoy while you walk back home
the arcade was not exactly very close to where you two lived (it was far from your house, but even farther from his-) so he asked if you were okay with walking back or if you two should get an uber or something, to which you said you were okay
walking back with him meant!! a little more time you could spend with him
and he was happy you said that because he was feeling the same way and still didn’t want the day to end
we’ll see more about the kind of things he likes and dislikes if he’s released as a playing character BUT FOR NOW i really get this vibe that he’d LOVE boba tea
i even think he’d?? enjoy tea in general??? classy boy…
SO you two would end up going to get some boba 
it was very touching how, when reading the flavors they had that day, he suddenly and casually went “oh, they have your favorite” and you looked at the one he was pointing at and !!! indeed it was your favorite!!!!!!!
he remembers this kind of details very well
you take the chance to talk some more as you’re walking home
scaramouche asks about your job with voice acting and you tell him that you actually have been recording some new lines for your genshin character lately because in the next update there’ll be an event involving them
he’s looking forward to it but he teases you a little asking if it’s okay for you to spoil him with such information
but it’s okay because it’s not like he’d tell anyone, especially knowing it could get you in trouble
when he drops you off at your house, he has a hard time saying goodbye
literally you’re standing at your door and he’s in front of you, a couple steps away, looking away from you
you don’t say goodbye either, mainly because you know scaramouche is working the courage to say something, and you can also sort of guess what he wants to say
you think of saying it first, but then think that it would make scaramouche proud to be honest about his feelings and confess first
“i’ve liked you for a long time”
you can’t help the smile that makes its way onto your face, unconsciously reaching a hand up to slightly cover it
“i feel the same way” you replied to him in a soft voice
he took a deep breath and exhaled it softly, finally lifting up his gaze and making eye contact with you
it was already dark outside, so you couldn’t appreciate the faint rosy blush on his cheeks well
“can i kiss you?”
your eyes widened for a second, not expecting him to ask and if anything, thinking he’d just step forward and do it
so you were a little embarrassed and caught off-guard to reply properly, so you just nodded and put your hand down as he took the last couple steps and his face was right in front of yours
he’d cup your cheek in one of his hands, feeling the warmth of your skin
you closed your eyes, and he looked at you for a second longer before he finally leaned in and closed the short distance that separated your lips
at that moment you both knew that you had been missing on so much more when you two just settled and were content with your friendship
but!! that was about to change now, so it was all worth it
after that, scaramouche would make clear that this would be the first day of your relationship!! and even if he didn’t say it with words, you could just feel his happiness!!
so!! after that, because of work you two got a little busy the next couple months so dates weren’t very frequent 
or at least, they weren’t dates like the one you first had
but still whenever you two were free he’d go over to your house, or you’d come over to his to play, stream together, or literally just spend time together doing anything
he wouldn’t let people know you two had started dating straight away (if anything, only his other streamer friends -aka you two’s friends in common- knew)
but the day he said it, he wanted you to be there
SO one day you two were streaming and you were currently reacting to one fanart of you two together
so he looked at you and you made eye contact and it was like you two spoke with your eyes like
“do we tell them now”
“let’s tell them.”
so scaramouche would clear his throat and without closing the fanart, he’d say he has something he wanted to announce
everyone was excited thinking it’d be some new project, maybe involving you
maybe some merch??? and the fanarts had reminded him of it???????
BUT THEN he straightforwardly said
“y/n and i are dating”
and everyone goes aBSOLUTELY CRAZY
amidst the chaos, you two catch a comment saying “will you unban the people who shipped you two” and you laugh
and you look at each other like “did you read that one?” “yeah”
and scaramouche is like “yeah, i guess i will have to unban some people”
and when some get unbanned they’re like “fREEDOM!!!!”
and jokingly they’re all like “APOLOGISE!!!!!!!! SAY SORRY!!!” so he just laughs and you join them being like “!!! apologise!!! you banned them for it and!! look at you now!!”
so he ends up trying to hold in another laugh as he mutters a halfassed ‘sorry’ and everyone starts commenting claps and hearts and celebrating that he apologised. now justice has been made.
the rest of that stream suddenly feels livelier and brighter!! you two are laughing a lot and so is everyone in the chat!! 
and also the new genshin event would’ve already just been released that same day so you can talk about some of your experiences with recording or what you thought of it
and scaramouche would let you play it yourself!! (he still hadn’t played it) and it was also the first time you played genshin live!! you’d show people the characters you have and everything and tell them some anecdotes
people would be SHOCKED because you!? don’t have the character you voiced!? D:
and you’re like “yeah… i pulled for them and used up all my primogems and… didn’t get them”
and your banner is back because of the event, so scaramouche won’t let this slide!!!!!!!!!! YOU WILL GET YOUR CHARACTER.
your luck is terrible compared to his so at one point you’ll literally feel bad for how much he’s spending for you to get it
but he doesn’t mind at all and everyone is having fun so!!
and once you finally get them you’re sO HAPPY and everyone in the chat is celebrating
and you think it’s over but scaramouche is like ???? what are you doing?? open the wish page again. you’re going to get them c6.
and you’re like oh my gOD PLEASE NO DON’T SPEND MORE MONEY ON ME FOR THIS
but he won’t listen and he’ll do it
so!!! he’ll always do his best to be the best boyfriend he can be for you!! so you better give him your heart!!!!
421 notes · View notes
Text
tuxedo, m | myg
pairing(s): yoongi x reader, mentions of previous jungkook x reader
summary: Your cat turns into a man. No, not, your cat was always a man and turned back into a man. Your actual cat turns into an actual man and neither you or your cat (man? cat-man?) have any idea why he's human now. Also, he's naked, so that’s a problem. Also, he’s kind of attractive. Yikes.
warnings: rated M (18+) for language, mentions of the coronavirus pandemic; possibly full-on crack; Yoongi still thinks he’s a cat; mentions of smut (fem reader, m-receiving oral (choking on a dick, but not in a sexy way), doggy, spanking, wall-fucking, unintentional??? voyeurism); non-idol!AU - cat!Yoongi x human!reader; ft slightly cocky Jeon Jungkook and you being mad horny for him, what’s new; breaking of the fourth wall; are YOU a furry? you decide
an anon asked for cat hybrid Yoongi, although instead this is some voodoo witch doctor shit, whoops yes, I do reference BT21, Bob Ross, the lady-pointing-to-the-cat-accusingly meme, list goes on... and there is a cameo of 2021 Seasons Greetings Kim Taehyung and Park Jimin XD
--
Your lungs were being crushed.
You were bundled in your duvet, wrapped like a mint-colored burrito, on your back, head nestled comfortably in your memory foam pillow. Warm, cozy, snuggly. All things considered, a comfortable position. So comfortable that you were blessedly asleep for many hours until your lungs started getting crushed.
You cracked one eye open.
A giant tuxedo fluffball was causing this slow and painful death.
“Get off.”
You glared with slitted eyes, voice cracking from sleep. The fluffball did not move. Velvety, pointed black ears flicked back and forth. The little pink nostrils flared a bit, breathing evenly and contentedly. At least one of you was. You grunted in irritation. The minty-green eyes opened, black slits for pupils.
“I’m going to die.”
Your cat meowed in your face.
“Shut the fuck up. Get off.”
He yawned.
You narrowed your eyes and lips into lines. Stared at your insufferable, not-so-subtle tuxedo cat that was killing his owner. How long had he and his seven-kilogram ass been sitting on your tits? Too long because your sternum was already aching. You rolled over and he gave you a disgruntled meow as he tumbled off. You pulled your arms out and gave him a soft scratch behind his ears before reaching around to his white belly and patting his chest. He started purring, rolling to his side, white sock-like paws sticking up.
“Ugh, my chest hurts, Shooks. You’re a dick.”
Your cat gave zero fucks.
You were still petting him. Sigh.
“I’m getting up,” you announced to no one except your cat.
You tugged yourself out of your comfy, mint-colored duvet and winced, rubbing your breastbone. Did you buy this bedding set because it reminded you of your cat’s eye color? Yes. Were you a crazy cat lady? Maybe. In your defense, you hadn’t meant to become a crazy cat lady. You were innocently walking on the street when the tuxedo-patterned cat started following you. A large cat with big minty eyes surrounded by black fur like black bangs. White snout and jaw, pink nose, and a raspy meow. The tuxedo pattern was pretty similar to an actual suit, with a white chest and black fur over its back and limbs. White, sock-like paws, on the bigger side. Cute pink toe beans too. At the time, he was skinny and dirty, no collar around his neck, but you could tell he was long-limbed. He had a cut on his right eye, caked with blood.
“You alright, little guy?”
The cat seemed to scoff at you disapprovingly, as if to say, do I seem like a little guy to you?
“I guess you’re not a little guy. You have an owner?”
The cat’s response was headbutting your calf.
You took him back to your apartment and then it was doomed.
Why was his name Shooks? Well, actually, your cat’s name was Shooky, and it was because you tried many names to get him to respond to you – including, but not limited to, “you little shit” – and he responded to none of them except Shooky. For some reason, Shooky made him turn his black-and-white face around and look at you.
Shooky it was.
The first encounter was cute, but after you had fed him and given him a few pats, you gave him a good, hard taste of reality. Shooky was very upset about getting a bath for the first time. There had been a lot of angry meowing, although thankfully he hadn’t swiped at you very much. As soon as you got mostly undressed and sat in the bath with him, he seemed to relent. Maybe it was because you closed the glass door and he couldn’t leave.
“Do you see how dirty you are? You need a bath.”
He gave you a disapproving meow.
“Look, I even bought pet shampoo and you’ll get treats after. Come on, you.”
He was very displeased.
In any case, Shooky was now your primary companion, a large, long-limbed, fluffy tuxedo cat, following you around as you brushed your teeth and made breakfast, his new black collar jingling with a tiny silver bell. Every morning, you handed him his dry food first – he chomped down immediately – and made yourself some breakfast as he ate. Somehow your life now revolved around him, spending time looking up the best cat food (without paying an arm and a leg, you weren’t a sugar momma), making sure he was brushed (his hair got everywhere), telling everyone you needed to get home because you couldn’t miss his dinnertime (if you were a second late opening the door, Shooky would start meowing very exaggeratedly, like he was dying, what a drama queen). Was he annoying? Yes. Was he the best cuddle buddy? Also, yes. Kind of like a boyfriend, but better, because Shooky didn’t talk back.
You arranged your small dishes on the table. Tofu. Eggs. Pickled squash. Just enough for one. You sat down, holding your bowl of steamed rice.
A tuxedo furball jumped onto the table, licking his chops.
“Look here, this isn’t for you. Shoo.”
He settled onto the tabletop and stared at you as you ate.
Sigh.
-
Live with a cat was pretty similar to life without one.
Except for that weird habit Shooky had of sitting on your bathroom rug when you got out of the shower, scaring the shit out of you the first time. You lived alone, so you didn’t really bother closing doors, but you considered changing that. But it was just a cat. Also, he walked in here of his own volition. Not your fault if his eyes were scarred.
Shooky was a normal cat, but also a weird cat.
He slept a lot. Normal. He bit his paws sometimes. Weird. You figured maybe it was his nails, so you learned to trim them and he seemed better about it, but sometimes when he was stressed, you would notice fur missing from his little white socks. A lot of things could stress a cat. The internet taught you that. You brought him toys and played with him, but mostly he seemed to want you to sit down so he could plant himself in your lap. This make life rather difficult, so you decided it was time to invest in Netflix so you could at least use your time wisely.
This was for your cat, remember.
Yes, binging shows on Netflix was for your cat.
The weirdest thing was…
Shooky was always stressed when you invited a man into your home.
Maybe he didn’t like men. Something in his past, maybe? Could be. Come to think of it, did you even like men? That was a question for another day, but in any case, your cat always gave you this accusing stare when you brought a guy over, no matter how nice the guy was, even if the guy petted him very gently. Shooky never attacked them. He just glared at you like you had betrayed him somehow. How could that be?
What a needy drama queen.
You figured, eh, it didn’t really matter. He wasn’t trying to sabotage your chances of finding true love and all that stuff. 
Who are we kidding?
You’d settle for a simple good dicking.
Well, there was that one time.
That time you were in the middle of giving a guy a blowjob. It was going great. You were naked, he was naked, he had a tattooed arm – hot as fuck – and he was very vocally enjoying your tongue technology. Hey, you didn’t have many talents, but you had that going for you. Even if a guy was mildly apprehensive about banging you, once you got your mouth on his dick, it was game over. You mentally patted yourself on the back for doing such a good job.
Positive reinforcement, right?
Annnnnnnd then…
Your cat jumped onto your back and made you choke on his dick.
“Urk!”
“Oh, fu–”
All seven kilos right between your shoulder blades. Oof.
“Are you okay?” He was half-worried, half-laughing, and Shooky was climbing up your back, pressing onto your neck, one paw on the nape, trying to murder you by dick suffocation. It took both of you to lift you off the dick – sad – and Shooky left a few scratches on your neck, as if to communicate his distaste of your infidelity. The guy was really nice about it. Actually, he found it hilarious. You scowled at Shooky and he gave you that deadpan stare that all cats seemed to have. The rest of the night was hot and heavy like you wanted and you even eventually got to complete said blowjob, which brightened your spirits.
It was a little disorienting that your cat was watching you from his cat tree the entire time.
Creep.
Honestly, you would have kept dating that guy if he didn’t move to a different city. Sigh.
Eventually, you stopped bringing men over.
One, because Shooky. Two, because worldwide pandemic.
Sigh.
-
The night that changed everything was ordinary.
Too ordinary.
You were passed out on the couch, halfway into season six of American Horror Story, somewhat peeved because you wanted to watch the other seasons, but geez, season five had such a poor story and hard focus on gore that it slightly turned you off. That it was a lot, even for you. Season six was better, but slow. The first four seasons had really hooked you and the idea of them all being connected? Nutty. You wanted to watch all of it.
Idea of season five? Awesome.
Lady Gaga? Yeah, why not, you’d be seduced.
Execution? Eh… could be better.
Shooky hadn’t watched any of it. He just slept in your lap.
Subtitles really helped you out here. You didn’t understand how the English-speaking audience could hear the whispering parts, but maybe that was because your English was garbage. You could read better than listen.
At the moment, you weren’t reading shit.
You were half-tucked in a fuzzy black blanket with a tuxedo cat pattern. Did you see the tuxedo cat pattern and buy it immediately? Yes. Were you a crazy cat lady? Maybe. In any case, your head was cocked at an awkward angle on the couch cushion and your mouth was open, snoring away. Attractive. You were wearing mint-colored, striped pajamas, one arm hanging off the couch and the other on Shooky’s furry butt, because you had been petting him.
Netflix was doing that annoying thing where it was asking you if you were still watching or not.
You couldn’t respond.
Shooky was awake.
Your cat was staring at your laptop on your coffee table. It was open. An HDMI cable connected it to your television. Not a clean setup, but an effective one. Again, you lived alone. Who was going to judge you? Your tuxedo cat?
Pfft.
Your cat was awake.
He got off your lap and hopped to the coffee table, peering at your laptop. Then he did what any sensible cat would do.
He walked all over your keyboard.
Circling around and around, smashing all the buttons with his cute pink toe beans, looking for a comfortable spot before settling down and planting his fluffy body on top of it. Windows closed, tabs appeared, the volume got muted, your display settings got fucked, the usual.
The unusual part was that your cat was looking at the screen.
Your internet browser was open.
A video was playing on a mysterious website.
A handsome young man with a boxy smile was wearing a sienna floral dress shirt and sunglasses, oddly paired with flared violet pants. He was standing next to another young man with an angelic face who, for some reason, was wearing a pastel floral handkerchief around on his head and a white-and-navy tracksuit with black, red, and green stripes. They were standing in some weird set with a black tablecloth covered round table and a lavender crystal ball, crystal-like beaded curtains glinting in strangely colorful lighting.
There was no volume.
Your cat tilted his head at the screen, curious.
The man with the boxy smile was speaking excitedly, gesturing to the angelic-looking man who seemed to be in awe. A retro, old school graphic popped up, flowers surrounding a blocky orange and green serif font, mildly tacky but somehow endearing in its own way.
COULD WISHES REALLY BE GRANTED?
Your cat tilted his head the other way.
Your cat didn’t know Korean.
… Right?
Well, you did mostly speak to him in Korean. Maybe he was secretly fluent. He definitely knew, don’t fucking do that, because you would witness him doing the very thing you told him not to do right after you said it. Bastard. But you couldn’t bear witness to this now. You were knocked out on the couch.
Zzz.
Boxy-smile guy placed his fingers elegantly on his forehead, mock dismay on his features, acting as if he couldn’t believe the viewer’s skepticism. Angel-looking guy placed his hands in prayer position, the text now reading, I won’t believe you unless you prove it! Boxy-smile guy flourished to the camera, showing off his brilliant pearly-white smile, mouthing words unheard. Text appeared once more.
Make a wish, any wish!
Your cat closed his eyes and appeared to be asleep.
The video turned black and disappeared into purple sparkles.
Your internet browser unexpectedly closed.
-
You woke up with a painful stitch in your neck and Shooky nowhere to be found.
“Fuck…”
You tried to get up, but underestimated the cramp in your back and fell onto the hardwood floor.
“Fuck!”
You blamed the pandemic for fucking up your sleep schedule. Also, getting old. Fuck getting old and being an adult. Time didn’t stop just because you didn’t go to work. Well, not true. You did go to work; your work was just different now. You were YouTube video editor, which meant you were mostly edited video game montages now instead of travel vlogs. The work was slower now. People were getting discouraged, taking breaks, because, you know.
Pandemic.
Sigh.
Anyway, not the point. You were grateful that your work was mostly internet and computer-based. Not everyone was so lucky. You were also grateful that you didn’t work in an industry that was too negatively affected by the pandemic. It had started off as a hobby, but then the creators you were helping unexpectedly blew up, needing your help more and more. You fell into it by accident, but that’s how life was. Happy little accidents. You couldn’t complain. As long as you had some income to feed your cat and you, that was enough.
Speaking of cat.
“Shooky?”
No meow.
Huh.
He normally would meow or trot over to you when called. He was weirdly affectionate like that.
You were still on the floor, on hands and knees, crick in your neck and back aching. Ah yes, age was just a number until your back pain flared up due to repeated nights of unintentionally falling asleep on the couch. Lovely. You stretched out your back with a groan and yawned, cracking your neck.
“FUCK!”
That hurt. Ugh, you really needed to stop sleeping on the sofa. You untangled yourself from your blanket and headed to the bathroom, rubbing your neck. You still didn’t see your fluffy, seven-kilogram, kind-of-an-ass tuxedo cat, but whatever. He had to be in the apartment. He couldn’t exactly leave. He was a cat. What was he going to do, grow legs and opposable thumbs?
Pfft.
You shoved your toothpaste-covered toothbrush in your mouth and began brushing your teeth. You hummed, trying to remember if you had any deadlines. Eh, they were on your Google calendar. You would check it after washing up. You spat and brushed for a few more minutes, thinking about nothing. This was nice. Sometimes it was nice to think about nothing. No major problems to address, simply a chill and routine morning.
Seemed sufficient.
You reached over to the spit cup and put some lukewarm water in it before taking your toothbrush out and sipping some water to gargle the minty suds out.
You heard a deep, raspy voice call your name.
“Hmm?”
You looked in the mirror.
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
Your mouth was full of dirty toothpaste water, cheeks puffed out.
The voice called your name again, quietly.
Nervously.
Your eyes widened, staring into the mirror in shock.
A pale man was standing behind you, wearing your mint-colored duvet over his shoulders. Messy black hair to his rounded cheeks, dark brown cat-like eyes, small pink pout. His nose was a little red, as if he was cold. There was a black choker on his neck, with a silver bell. He was taller than you, and he looked very confused.
Also.
Pointed, velvety black ears on top of his head, white tufts of fur sticking out, flicking back and forth.
You spat all over your mirror in shock.
“Urk–!”
The man jerked back as you threw your head into the sink, hastily taking another cupful of water to rinse out your mouth because, WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON? Why was there a man in your apartment? With fucking cat ears? That moved? What kind of kinky shit was that? Were you dreaming? What the fuck?! You grabbed the hand towel from its hook and furiously wiped the dirty water off your mirror, completely convinced you were having sensory and auditory hallucinations. Did you drink last night? Accidentally buy groceries laced with LSD? Snorted three kilos of cocaine off a hooker? Who the fuck knows, but there was no fucking way that you let some fucking man in your home, because, one, pandemic and, two, Shooky–
You froze.
The pale man with black hair was still there, standing in the doorway of your bathroom, looking slightly disgusted, but also scared.
He said your name again. A question, almost like a raspy meow.
It was…
Familiar?
You violently wiped your bathroom mirror some more, nearly cracking the glass.
The man was still there, wearing your mint-colored duvet.
Slowly, slowly, you turned around to face this man, your neck cracking loudly, sending searing pain up the back of your head and reminding you that, nope, this is not a dream, and if it was, it was a very shitty dream because at least in a dream you shouldn’t actually feel pain. You looked up at this man, at his fluffy black bangs shading his dark attentive eyes and pale face, chewing on his lip, clutching your duvet around his body like a giant mint cloak.
The cat ears on his head twitched.
“Uh…”
You blinked at him, watching the ears.
“Do… I know you?”
He gave you an eerily recognizable deadpan stare. “I think you do.”
No way.
What?
No.
This wasn’t possible.
You’re drunk, high, or in purgatory.
(You did have sex before marriage.)
“S… Shooky?” you croaked.
The man took a deep breath and shook his head.
“Actually, my name is Min Yoongi.”
You blinked at him. “What? You have a name?”
He shrugged. “Yeah, I guess.”
Relief washed over you. “What do you mean, you guess? That means you’re a human being! With a birth certificate! Thank God, I thought you were my fucking cat for some reason, haha, that’s so fucking ridiculous–!” For some reason, the idea of a random stranger being in your home was much more comfortable to you than you damn cat becoming a human being, because for a hot second, you thought… but no, no, that’s stupid. “Speaking of ridiculous, these ears are crazy dude, they look almost real–”
You reached up and yanked on one of the velvety ears.
“Ow, what the fuck!”
Oh.
Oh my God.
OhmyfuckingGodthey’reattachedtohishead.
“What the FUCK?” you bellowed and a large pale hand shot out of the duvet to clamp one of his cat ears down, shrinking away from you.
“Stop yelling, please, I have sensitive hearing,” Yoongi winced, ticking his head, as if he was trying to flatten the other ear too, but couldn’t. His other hand was holding tightly to the mint duvet.
You saw a glimpse of a pale chest.
Your eyes widened into the size of saucepans.
His hand darted back into the duvet and clamped it shut from your bulging eyes, frowning. He quickly bundled himself up and straightened, thinning his mouth into a line. A few seconds passed. You gawked at him, jaw slack. The pale man sighed heavily.
“My name is Min Yoongi. My parents gave me that name. I don’t think I have a human birth certificate because I’m not a human. I am a cat. You used to call me Shooky, but Min Yoongi is my name, so I would appreciate it if you called me by my given name.”
Your jaw went even more slack.
“Cats… have names?” you squeaked.
Yoongi made a face at you. “Of course, we do. We are not savages.”
“B… But…” You frowned, shoulders falling. “You seemed to like the name Shooky…”
Yoongi shrugged his duvet-covered shoulders. “It sounded better than all the other names you suggested.”
You puffed your cheeks, placing your hands on your hips. “What was wrong with Tata? Or Chimmy? Or Cooky?”
Yoongi gave you a disapproving glare. “Well, perhaps in a parallel universe the name Shooky is somehow important to me. In any case, it was the best suggestion.”
You narrowed your eyes, frowning. “You little shit.”
“I especially disliked that one. Seemed a bit discriminating to our size difference…” He paused, looking down at you. “At the time anyway.”
Your hands fell, looking up at your cat. Er. Min Yoongi. “So, uh… Yoongi…?”
He tilted his head, peering curiously at you under his black bangs. “Hm?”
You pointed at him, gesturing up and down. “Why are you, uh… a man?”
He looked down at the duvet covering his body. You stared at your bedding wrapped around him. Why was he wearing it anyway? In fact, all you could see was a black choker with a silver bell. The mental lightning bolt suddenly hit you. Oh. Your neck began to heat. Your ears began to heat. Your whole face began to heat. Oh. Oh? Oh! Shooky – er, Yoongi? – whatever, your cat didn’t wear clothes. He only wore a collar… which meant…
It felt like your whole body was on fire with abrupt realization.
Yoongi looked up at your mint-pajama-wrapped, now tomato self still pointing at him.
“I don’t know why I’m a man.”
One of his eyebrows raised. Then Yoongi smirked.
An open-mouthed, amused smirk.
“And yes, I’m naked. Your clothes don’t fit me. I tried.”
-
Your cat, er, man? Cat-man? What even... never mind, Min Yoongi was sitting on your bed, still wrapped in your mint duvet like a key lime cake roll, waiting as you rummaged around in your dresser, searching for literally any piece of clothing that might possibly fit him. The problem was, you worked from home, so you didn't exactly own a plethora of different clothing options. Your daily wardrobe consisted of slinky black leggings...
"They're stretchy?" you suggested timidly. 
Yoongi had blinked at you. "I don't think so."
"It could work?"
He pursed his lips together. "I think you're forgetting something."
You gave him a blank look. "Huh?"
Yoongi gave you his deadpan stare. "I believe you are well acquainted with human male genitalia."
Oh.
Right. 
He had a dick.
You turned red and robotically shoved your leggings back into their place. A sudden thought flitted across your brain and you spun back to face him, blurting it out before filtering yourself. 
"Hahaha, good thing I never got you fixed, eh?"
Yoongi blinked very, very slowly. It was hard to tell if he was annoyed, amused, or wanted to murder you. In conclusion, typical cat behavior. 
"I'm not fond of the idea of castration, so I suppose so."
Awkward.
Your vet had suggested it, but since he had been an indoor cat and you weren't intending on getting another, you figured you wouldn't put him under the unnecessary surgery and it would help you avoid the cost. A little irresponsible? Maybe. But you were very careful not to leave the front door open and, so far, he hasn't had the chance to get some poor lady cat knocked up.
Unfortunately…
He knew you considered permanently removing his nuts. Yikes.
Sorry, Shooks. Er, Yoongi. 
In any case!
The other half of your daily wardrobe was sweatshirts, but Yoongi's shoulders were too broad for them and he was too tall. Why was he so big anyway? Well, he wasn’t exactly big, just long-limbed. You guessed he was actually on the leaner side, judging from the way the duvet wrapped around him and the brief flash of long fingers, slim forearm, and toned chest. He had been a larger cat.
Seven kilos turned into... him?
You suddenly started and yanked open your underwear drawer, shuffling through it to get to the back and pull out a neatly folded dark gray blob.
"I have this–"
"No."
The response was so forceful and dismissive that you froze, the dark gray fabric unfurling in your loose grip. It was a large men's sweatshirt, soft, charcoal, slightly acid-wash, covered with white paint stains. Eggshell white, to be exact. The exact paint color of this very bedroom, because you had worn it to repaint over that original disgusting beige color.
"Why not?" you inquired, holding it up by the shoulders. "It'll fit you, for sure. It used to be..."
Yoongi kept his completely neutral expression trained on you as you reached your revelation, his dark eyes observing every detail of your body's reaction to the memory. Your grip on the sweatshirt tightened. You felt your cheeks and ears heat, pulse roaring in your ears.
Oh.
Er, right, so…
That one time that Shooky – no, Yoongi? – jumped on your back and made you choke on a dick? Yeah, that guy. Tattoo guy. Yeah, well, before that incident, tattoo guy was the friend of a friend who offered to help you paint your apartment because he had experience working construction – “helped my dad fix-up a house to resell for a couple months,” he had said with his disgustingly cute, cheeky grin, making you nod like an idiot and your pussy throb with his endearing adorableness – and you had moved all the furniture out so you two could get it done quickly.
You had to put your cat in the bathroom.
You didn’t want him to breathe in the fumes or get paint on his luscious fur. It was for his own good.
Tattoo guy had appeared in said charcoal sweatshirt, black ripped jeans, and the most attractive thighs in the whole damn universe, just out and about, giant holes exposing tan skin and taut muscle. Your eyes widened, frozen at your front door.
Oh yeah, he had paint rollers too. You hadn’t given a shit about those in that moment.
He had noticed you staring and laughed sheepishly. “Sorry, I just wore the ugliest pants I own. It might get messy, you know?”
No, tattoo guy. No one thought your pants were ugly.
You sure as hell didn’t.
“Oh, yeah, that’s why I wore this gross t-shirt,” you said absentmindedly, referring to your four-sizes-too-large, free t-shirt that had been chucked at your head while walking past your university common area. It was a hideous chanteuse with magenta writing, a color combination that absolutely deserved to go to hell, and could not even be saved by the quirky, stylish, thrift-savvy TIkTokers of today. It was the ugliest thing you owned, so you wore it to repaint your bedroom.
Now you regretted it.
Tattoo guy looked you up and down. He smirked under his long black hair.
“Your body still looks great though.”
“… Urk?”
Didn’t really matter that you couldn’t conjure a sexy response, because, clearly, tattoo guy had made his decision leagues before arriving here. Painting a bedroom? Oh, yeah, you did that, and with way too much sexual tension. A man should not be that flirty while holding two paint rollers and speed painting your walls. What were you supposed to do? You barely knew the guy. All you managed to do was make awkward small talk to get to know him better. Then he took off his sweatshirt.
“Wait, that’s illegal.”
He had smirked at you, spinning the paint roller in his hand, white t-shirt molded to his body. “Hm?”
You were being mildly disrespected, but also you were gawking at his tattooed right arm and his blindingly beautiful forearms. Cough, no. You didn’t have a thing for attractive forearms. Wasn’t like staring at this muscular pair was making you weak at the knees or anything. Okay, maybe. But you weren’t going to say it out loud. Tattoo guy ticked his chin below you, to the floor. Your job was to paint the little nooks at the corners, ceiling, and baseboards. You spent a whole lot of your job sneaking glances at him and getting caught.
Shit.
“You missed a spot.”
You whipped your head to the floor, craning your head to look for it. A paint roller appeared beside you, pointing to a small sliver for nasty beige. He had a clear, silvery voice.
“Right here.”
You frowned at it and raised your paintbrush in warning to the offensive beige, ready to strike.
“… Noona.”
You started and fell over.
You sputtered, legs tangled, oversized shirt flipping up, trying not to drop the paintbrush and drawing a fat streak across the unpainted wall. You shook your head roughly, clutching the handle of the brush, cool draft floating up your shirt.
Tattoo guy appeared above you, grinning, his front teeth slightly too large and giving him the appearance of a rambunctious bunny.
“You alright?”
You felt your neck and ears heat. No, you were not alright. Yes, you were older, but that didn’t… that wasn’t the time… You didn’t expect it, that’s all. You tried very hard not to look at his thighs. Or his face. Or his chest. Just didn’t look at him. Also, you were pretty sure you were flashing him and pretty fucking sure you didn’t give a shit.
You coughed awkwardly. “Yup, I’m good.”
Back to copious sexual tension complemented by paint fumes.
Once the first coat was down, you two stood in the center of the room, surrounded by the plastic drop cloth, him banishing a paint roller and you a paintbrush. Challenge complete and it didn’t take you very long. Nice.
“We have to let it dry and then we can paint another coat,” he was explaining.
“It looks fine like this.”
Tattoo guy clicked his tongue, shaking his head. “Once it dries, it will look uneven. Trust me.”
You frowned. “Okay. How long should we wait?”
“Couple hours, at least.”
A couple hours? You frowned more. “What are we supposed to do until then?”
He didn’t reply. You turned your head to face him and tattoo guy was staring at you with a smile.
Uh oh.
He was spinning the paint roller with one hand. You felt your ears and neck heat. He switched from his left hand to his right, seamlessly. Incredibly sexy. Were the paint fumes getting to you? You gulped, awkwardly gesturing to the paintbrush.
“Let me just… put this down…”
You turned around and balanced your paintbrush in the paint tray, only to gasp as your felt something foamy roll down your back, covering you with the strong stench of paint. It stopped above the curve of your ass, unable to roll smoothly any longer.
“Hmm, can’t get past your juicy ass, noona,” he teased.
You spun around, cheeks flushed, sputtering.
No, no. You didn’t forget tattoo guy’s name. You remembered it, even now. Remembered saying it in multiple different ways, even.
“Jeon J-Jungkook!”
In surprise, streaks of paint in your hair, him smirking, dropping the paint roller on the other plastic tray and somehow not tipping it over, thank goodness, him walking up to you, taking the bottom of your paint-covered chanteuse university t-shirt, leaning down to whisper hotly against your lips.
“Ah, sorry, it seemed like you didn’t like that shirt very much,” he breathed, sending your brain into overdrive with the heat against your skin, his knuckles brushing your thighs. “You can wear my sweatshirt instead, if you like.”
Your eyes widened, staring at him in shock.
“J… Jungkook…”
In breathlessness, heart pounding in your chest, gaze locked with mischievous dark chocolate orbs, his teeth catching his lower lip, tiny mole underneath revealed.
“Yeah?”
Why was his voice so deep? The tiny tip of his pink tongue darted out, licking his lips enticingly.
“… Noona?”
This man was illegal.
Your hands darted down and gripped his, catching your lower lip in your teeth as well, matching his lip bite, seeing the eagerness growing in his eyes.
Someone should call the police. Or an ambulance.
You grinned, cocking an eyebrow. “I don’t want to wear anything around you.”
But not for you.
There was a very loud meow from your bathroom, but before Jungkook could ask, you yanked your shirt up and over your head. He gasped and instantly it was lips on lips, messy kisses and stumbling to the living room were your bed, dresser, nightstands, bookcase, knickknacks, everything scattered everywhere, but Jungkook and you were too busy yanking off clothes and getting frisky to give a shit.
Yikes.
You stared at Yoongi now, red from head to toe, clutching the dark gray sweatshirt. He rolled his eyes and looked away from you.
“I… washed it?” you offered weakly.
Yoongi’s dark brows raised from under his black bangs. “Mmm, you forget that I have quite keen hearing. I’m not deaf like you, human.”
The color drained from your face.
Well.
Maybe, just maybe, Jungkook got you to wear his dark gray sweatshirt, forcing you – respectfully, he called you noona, after all – to get on your hands and knees for him, then make you wait in said embarrassing position with his sweatshirt bunched around your neck – because, er, gravity – while he casually made you watch him roll the condom on, highly amused by your impatient glare, only to move away and slowly shove his dick inside your soaking wet pussy and spank your ass until you backed up into him enough times to make yourself cum on his stiff length without him moving his hips.
Respectfully, of course.
“Fuck, noona, that was so fucking hot…”
“Jungkook,” you gasped breathlessly, ass stinging in glorious pain. “F-Fuck me, please.”
He made you scream.
He fucked your hard, making the bed creak, pounding you so roughly into the mattress that your fingers curled into the mint sheets, and when you gasped that you were close, he fucking stopped, the damn sadist, causing you to slam your fists into the bed and buck back into his crotch, Jungkook chuckling at your desperation. In your haze of begging for Jungkook’s cock, you heard a judgmental meow from your bathroom, but before you could address it, Jungkook seemed to have accepted your pleading and began to thrust into you once more, making you lose your train of thought and all thoughts in general, except your dire need to orgasm.
Jungkook had made you moan for hours.
Right now, however, Yoongi’s sharp look was making you mute. You were so mortified that you swore your soul stood up and walked out of your body, too ashamed to be in Yoongi’s presence any longer.
“Mmm,” the dark-haired man mused absentmindedly, pointed ears flicking.
From spitting onto the mirror to mentioning his possible castration to remembering that you had locked Yoongi in the bathroom for hours to have mind-blowing sex with Jeon Jungkook under the guise of repainting your bedroom walls…
Too bad life doesn’t have an undo button.
You suddenly remembered Jungkook pushing you up against the bathroom door, your leg hooked around his waist, his cock plunging in and out of you, lips on your neck, and your wrists pinned to the door, rattling it as he fucked you, whispering against your skin.
“You sound so fucking sexy, make more sounds for me, I’ll fuck you as much as you want, fuck you until you can’t think, can’t move, just to hear you say my name over and over…”
“Jungkook… f-fuck, you f-feel so fucking good, o-oh, Jungkook…!”
He pulled his lips away from your neck and smirked in your face.
“Yeah… noona?”
Respectfully.
“Fuck!”
Your back arced against the bathroom door as you came, pussy throbbing and spasming, the top of your head touching the wood, gasping Jungkook’s name in ecstasy, slamming your wrists against the door, Jungkook moaning as he came inside you, cock jerking inside the condom and swelling it with his orgasm, lips crashing down on yours and you whining pathetically into his mouth as he sucked on your tongue roughly.
A quiet, disapproving meow below you.
A master yikes.
You deliberately shoved the dark gray blob back into your underwear drawer.
Yoongi pursed his lips.
“Why is it in your underwear drawer, anyway?”
You slowly closed it, the wood snapping as the drawer touched the dresser.
Silence.
A crow cawed in the distance.
“You know what, let me make a trip to the convenience store…” was your hollow reply as you mechanically walked out of your bedroom, followed by a mint duvet.
“Do you know what size I would be?” came the husky, amused chuckle behind you as you pawed around your apartment for your wallet, two masks, hand sanitizer.
“I’ll just… buy a variety…”
“Or you could measure.”
You heard a rustle and you whipped your head around, only to see Yoongi’s cocked eyebrow and a slight bit of his exposed shoulders, collarbones on display, silver bell jingling. He yanked it back up, frowning at you.
“Are you a pervert?”
“N… no!”
You jerked away and hastily hooked the masks on your ears, fumbling with your sneakers before declaring, “I will be right back!” And then you threw yourself out the door.
Yoongi sighed, finally releasing his hold on the duvet.
“Ugh, so stuffy…”
His long black tail whipped about.
The door suddenly jerked back open and you plucked your keys from the side dish.
Only to see Yoongi fully naked, sleek black tail whisking around, blinking at you.
He was naked.
Really naked.
Very, one hundred percent, naked.
The mint duvet was pooled around his legs on the ground and Min Yoongi, who was formerly your cat Shooky, was a fair-skinned, long-limbed, lean-bodied, very attractive tall man, with velvety black cat ears and tail and – urk! – completely intact human male genitalia. Your neck, ears, cheeks, chest, ancestors from generations long ago, all turned red in embarrassment. Once again, you soul completely left your body in pure mortification.
“D… Don’t leave!” you blurted, snapping the door closed.
Yoongi just stood there, sighing as he heard the door lock and a body bolt down the apartment building stairs.
“You didn’t even change out of your pajamas…” he muttered, picking up the duvet.
-
"I can't wear these."
It was a few hours later. Thankfully, when you arrived home with your purchases, your cat... man was asleep, wrapped like a mint cake roll in your duvet. You tried not to think about his naked body on your bed, therefore ending up thinking about his naked body on your bed. 
"You need to wear pants! For..."
Dark eyebrows raised. 
"Decency!"
After getting home, you had spent the next thirty minutes hand-washing a black t-shirt, black boxer briefs, and loose black pants that were definitely too short but it was the only size available that could fit that waist, so you had to make do. You put the other shirts and underwear in the washing machine, but you needed to wash at least one outfit and hang it to dry. You tried to use the hottest water your hands could handle to sterilize the clothing, wincing at the blistering heat. 
You didn't know if Yoongi could get coronavirus but you weren't going to risk it. 
Eventually you placed everything on the drying rack and positioned your space heater on them to dry them off. 
Then you passed out on the couch. You deserved it, after working so hard.
Only to be woken up by Yoongi poking your shoulder roughly and telling you he couldn't wear the underwear and pants. 
He was still holding the duvet around his body and your neck was still regretting every second of sleeping on the couch. Ow. Too much physical labor. Quarantine had turned you into a formless potato. You sat up halfway, wincing. Ugh, pain. You jabbed your finger at Yoongi, who gave you a displeased narrowing of his eyes. 
"Put the pants on, you animal!"
Yoongi swept around the sofa, mint duvet and all, determined glint in his dark orbs, lips pursed in annoyance. You started, cracking your neck by accident, yelping in pain as you fell back against the couch.
Yoongi planted himself on top of you nimbly.
You froze.
Partly because you were shocked, but mostly because your neck seized a bit.
His legs were on either side of you, body still wrapped up, perfectly balanced despite the sudden leap, surveying you with a disapproving and discerning eye. The silver bell on his neck jingled with his movement. You could feel his calves against your knees.
His bare calves.
"Are you dumb?"
"What?" you croaked in response.
Yoongi rolled his eyes. "You always forget things."
You blinked at him, confused, neck heating. "What are you talking about?" you snapped impatiently.
"This."
Thump.
You felt something long and furry hit your leg. Your body almost jerked up in surprise, but Yoongi hissed at you, making you lurch back, somewhat stunned at how cat-like it sounded. It was definitely a warning. You were still in your pajamas, slightly thinner material than your usual clothes. It had been cold outside, but your everlasting embarrassment had kept you toasty warm.
Like it was now, because you realized your clothed outer thigh was touching his inner thigh.
His naked inner thigh.
You let out a noise between shock and confusion.
"Urk?"
The long, furry thing brushed against your legs as Yoongi watched you reach your slow realization.
"O-oh... Right. You have a tail..."
He grunted, thinning his eyes into slits. "Yes, because I am a cat."
Highly debatable at the moment, but you were too busy remembering your cat also had a human dick and nuts. Well, not also. Only had? Well. Maybe if you had a seco–
No. No, never mind that. Yeah.
Never.
Mind.
You gulped, trying to suppress the rising heat in your ears and failing. "I can sew?"
Yoongi tilted his head, nose wrinkling a bit. Then he got off you, circling around the couch. You sat up, neck still hurting, but the warmth of your embarrassment somehow helping. Yes, great, trading temporary physical pain for lifetime mental embarrassment, only for such moments to be remembered at the most inopportune times to throw you off guard.
Awesome.
You visibly cringed before standing up, seeing Yoongi's hand snake out and nab the boxer briefs, making them disappear into the duvet. You saw the fabric rustle and then the briefs reappeared, chucked at your face.
Your head snapped back at the force, arms flailing.
"Mmphf!"
"Should be about four or five centimeters. Make it quick. It's hot under here."
You yanked the underwear off your face, scowling. "I'm not your maid!"
Yoongi raised an eyebrow, black ears flicking. He was smirking at you. You narrowed your eyes. What was this guy so high and mighty for? If anything, he should be grateful that you even car–
"You're been cleaning up my literal shit for a few years now, so you are practically are my maid."
... Wait a second, he's right.
You growled and hauled yourself up.
-
An hour later, your cat was dressed.
Cat?
Man?
Whatever.
Min Yoongi was finally wearing clothes and not your duvet and your fingers stung like a bitch.
You ended up snipping a hole and using bias tape to seal off the raw edges. You didn’t own a sewing machine, so this was the next best thing you could think of without destroying your fingers by trying to imitate zig-zag stiches, although you ended up destroying your fingers anyway because you had to sew small, delicate stitches to attach the bias tape. The area was too high traffic to not reinforce.
Sigh.
“Please tell me you know how to use the bathroom by yourself from now on.”
Yoongi had raised an eyebrow.
“Of course. I’ve watched you enough times to know how to expel human excrement.”
Right. Because he was your cat. Don’t think about it too much. You were trying to take everything one thing at a time so you didn’t overwhelm yourself. Those were future-you problems. Why does he talk like that anyway? You didn’t even know how he knew Korean. Was it because you watched too much television? Yikes.
You rubbed your forehead, dismissing the discussion. “Good talk.”
You realized you would have to cut openings for his tail for all the underwear on the drying rack but, again, that was a future-you problem. Instead, you let him change in your bedroom and went to retrieve the laptop on your coffee table. Plugged it in and turned it on.
All your settings were wack.
“The fuck?” you muttered, resetting your display, volume, brightness, sigh, nearly everything. This only happened when a certain someone stepped on the keys when you weren’t looking. You raised your voice, still looking at the screen. “Did you fuck with my computer last night?”
“No. Oh, well, I did sleep on it,” Yoongi was saying as he stepped out of your bedroom. You growled in your chest, annoyed, but setting everything back into its place before opening your Google calendar. Nothing due immediately, thank god. “Er, maybe you shouldn’t…”
You looked up.
Oh.
Oh?
Oh!
Yoongi mussed his black hair, scratching at his velvety black ear. You noticed he didn’t have a set of human ears. Well, duh. That’d be weird. He was still wearing the black choker with the little silver bell on it. The t-shirt was nicely loose on his frame, the black standing out against his fair skin. The sweatpants were a little short on the ankle, the slim fit showing off his leanness. The sleek black tail swished back and forth.
He was… handsome.
Yoongi looked apprehensive, twisting his lips to one side. “Hmm.”
You blinked at him. “What?”
He shrugged. “Well, when I woke up as a human, I was cold, except for…” His hand ghosted towards his crotch. He pulled it away, waving it aside. “Mmm, never mind.”
You gave him a confused look and went back to your keyboard, typing away. Yoongi winced but you were too busy replying to an email to think too much about it.
-
We interrupt your regularly scheduled program to inform you of the following.
Min Yoongi had woken up on the coffee table, fucking freezing because humans didn’t have fur, and because his nuts and dick were getting roasted by your overheating laptop keyboard.
Upon waking up, he had a mild mental breakdown as you continued snoring loudly and unceremoniously, before scurrying away to the warmest place he knew – your bed, where he claimed the duvet and tried to figure out what the fuck was going on.
Is this real life?
He had poked at various parts of his new body, trying to figure out if this was a dream or a horrific nightmare.
As we all know.
Life is a horrific nightmare, so indeed, this was real life.
-
You jumped as Yoongi slumped down on the sofa next to you, sticking his head and ears into your view, blocking the computer screen.
“I’m hungry.”
You gawked at him.
“What a-are you d-doing?” you sputtered.
“I’m hungry,” he repeated. He had a bit of a raspy, almost growly voice at times, reminding you of a cat’s meow. His meow, in fact.
You scooted away, neck heating. Yoongi followed, prodding you.
“Why are you like this?” you grumbled irritably, smacking his hand. Yoongi persisted, as if you did nothing at all.
“This is how I get your attention, because you humans will ignore me if I don’t.”
“You’re a human too!”
“No, I am a cat.”
“Hello?” You grabbed his hand and jabbed at his palm, pointing to his thumb. “Cats don’t have thumbs!”
Yoongi yanked his hand out, shockingly similar to how Shooky used to pull his paw out when you were massaging his little white socks and he was over it. You noticed his cuticles looked a bit dry and torn up. Lately, Shooky’s paws had been a little chewed up too. You frowned at it, tilting your head.
Yoongi stood up and his tail whacked you in the face.
“Ow!”
“Feed me.”
You scowled, rubbing your cheek. Yoongi stared down at you, face expressionless.
Okay, your cat might be a man now, but he was still a borderline asshole, so not much had changed.
“Fine.”
-
You both stared at the bowl of dry cat food.
Yoongi raised an eyebrow.
“What am I supposed to do with all this cat food then? I just brought it last week!”
“That’s your problem.”
You threw up your hands and cooked you both some lunch.
-
This was too much.
You know what you did when it was too much?
You took a nap.
You had dishes to clean, underwear to make tail-holes for, a cat that was now a man, an existential crisis to address, but you know what? You took a fucking nap instead. You left Yoongi with your computer and Netflix and told him to do whatever as long as none of it involved him leaving the house.
Yoongi had snorted. “What do I need to go out there for?”
“Awesome. I’m taking a nap.”
And you passed out.
Only to wake up groggily because your lungs were being crushed.
Actually no, it kind of felt like your whole torso was being crushed.
“Urk…!”
You fought with your sleepiness, somehow worse off than you had been before the nap, scrunching up your face ad blinking blearily. Head on memory foam pillow, check. Back on soft mattress, check. Black hair with sleek cat ears and pale face pressed on your chest? Check.
What, wait?
“Gah!”
You lurched and the head grunted, shoulders solidly pinning you down. He was under the mint-colored duvet. Yoongi, your cat that was now a man, was under the duvet.
UNDER THE DUVET.
“Stop yelling. Is that all you humans do? Yell?”
“Why are you – what are you doing here?” you hissed shrilly, trying to wiggle out from under him, but it was impossible. Yoongi was far too big now for you to throw him off.
“Sleeping, obviously,” he grumbled. “Or I was, until you started shouting.”
“Yes, but this is my bed,” you emphasized, realizing you could move your hands so you grabbed him by the waist, fingers grasping the black jersey fabric. You pressed inwards, hands molding to his sides.
Yoongi raised his head, squinting down at you.
You froze.
An oddly familiar gaze of accusation and uncaring. His eyes were dark brown, not the recognizable mint, but the effect was the same. Pink lips upturned, slightly annoyed.
And.
You suddenly remembered he was a man.
A man who was pressed down against you, long legs around your legs, broad chest to your chest, and shockingly attractive for someone who used to be a cat.
“I sleep in your bed all the time. What’s the difference?” Yoongi muttered.
What’s the difference?
The difference???
You’re a man!
A HOT MAN!!!
You struggled to find words, completely entranced by how close Yoongi’s face was to yours, watching his ears adjust slightly to pick up all the small sounds around him. You opened your mouth and it only made a tiny squeak. The pressure on your chest was becoming unbearable. You were so shocked that you completely forgot that you were still dying. You cleared your throat as Yoongi looked increasingly displeased.
“You… You used to be over the duvet…”
Yoongi yawned, nodding a little. “Yes, but it’s colder now. No more fur. I don’t know how you humans survive. Must be why you buy these warm things.”
Your hands were still on his waist. You pulled them away quickly and Yoongi frowned.
“Y-Yeah, but… you weigh a lot more now…” you croaked. “Can’t… breathe…”
Yoongi sighed heavily, as if this was a great disappointment. He slid off you.
“Hmm, I suppose that’s true.”
He nestled close to you and you still stunned, pin-straight body.
“Guess it’ll have to be like this instead from now on.”
Like this?
From now on?
Oh. Oh no.
Yoongi’s velvety, pointed ear flicked against your cheek, a low hum resounding in his chest.
-
part ii
--
masterpost
667 notes · View notes
t-lostinworlds · 4 years
Text
Truth or Drink (Tom Holland)
[YouTube AU: Video 2]
a/n: this took a while asdfghjkl this was in my drafts since oct. at 7k already (but got distracted with other WIPs as always) and was suggested by this anon back in aug. so i’m sorry this took a so long hun. also, the gif took a fucking while too ‘cause we are extra in this house haha (i mean, i wanted the time in the vid to match the wc so ha). anyway, enough babbling and let’s get into the video! lol, i hope you guys enjoy this one!
Tumblr media
summary: You and Tom do a couples Q&A where you spilled steamy secrets with the help from alcohol. pairing: tom holland x fem!reader warnings: dialogue bonanza (lots of laughing and asking), alcohol consumption, secret spilling (from both parties), teasing from everyone (will include dirty jokes from the lads), mentions of smut & risque aka sex-themed questions. word count: 14.2k+ (aha enjoy!)
☰ youtube channel | previous video << ǁ >> next video ☰ masterlist on bio & pinned post
⚠ DISCLAIMER: this is a multi-part (not a series) which is basically one-shots happening in the same universe meaning you don’t need to read the previous one to understand this one since they are not heavily connected plot wise. although each fic does happen chronologically, you don’t need to read them in order much like how you don’t need to watch youtube videos in order.
-:-:-:-:-
You knew something was about to happen the moment you walked into the dining area, the way Tom immediately went to latch onto you like a koala bear—as if he hasn't seen you just minutes before—tells all.
"What are you up to now?" you asked with a playful scrunch of your nose.
You rested your hands on his shoulders, the fabric of his pink hoodie—while you wore his other pink hoodie, outfits not at all planned since you just took the first thing you saw in his closet—soft to the touch as you took a glance at the camera that was set up at the head of the dining table. The greenery of the outside world behind the glass doors served as a backdrop to the shot.
The crease between your brows deepened at the sight, gaze landing back on the boy attached to your hip who was hugging you sideways with a certain glow in his eyes.
"I'm not up to anything," Tom denied, nuzzling his face on the crook of your neck to litter the skin with sweet and soft kisses. Although the gesture made your heart melt, it also made your suspicion grow. You just know there was more to this than meets the eye.
Strong arms staying around your torso, Tom pulled away slightly so he could meet your gaze again, a certain smile growing on his lips, one you know too well. It was the usual smile he wears whenever he wants something from you, a favor perhaps. An all too powerful grin that had you made him get away with things—mostly stupid ones—easily that you aren't exactly proud to admit.
"Tom," you warned with a raise of a brow, enough seriousness and command in your tone that he was quick to give in.
"Okay, okay, we're shooting the next video," he chuckled, tracing your jaw with the tip of his nose before giving it a soft peck. "Which I am hoping you'll do with me still," he murmured, placing another kiss on your cheek before pulling away to look at you fully as he flashed you a not-so-innocent smile.
Bingo.
Tom just doesn't suddenly become so clingy—well, he normally is but more than usual anyway—especially out of nowhere without it having an underlying reason.
You narrowed your eyes at him skeptically. You stayed silent as you weighed your odds, if the enjoyment of making the video was worth it for you to endure the obvious embarrassment that would come with it. You do love this YouTube thing he's got going on, you truly do enjoy being a part of it. But with the things he's spilled in the last video, you just want to make sure that this time won't be too much, though you highly doubt it.
It was hilarious how his bottom lip started to go at your reaction, eyes turning rounder, cuter that would give Puss in Boots a run for his money. And just as you counted in your head, three, two, one—
"Please, darling? Do it with me?" Tom cooed, placing his head on your shoulder as he gave your waist a loving squeeze, fluttering his eyelashes at you in the most adorable of ways with that cute pout to match. It was his signature look whenever he wanted something, the look of handsome and adorable persuasion. "I'll keep the secret-spilling at a minimum, love. And besides, we can always edit it out."
You let out a soft sigh, shaking your head at the fact that you're saying yes either way. You can never say no whenever he puts on that very persuasive face of his, can never resist him even if you tried. And of course, Tom knows this power he has over you, and he's mastered a way on how and when to use it to his advantage.
You aren't exactly proud to say that he has never failed once, his tactic very effective and that's putting it lightly. It's sneaky and annoying sometimes but it's still cute nonetheless.
Though, never did he once abuse this weakness of yours, only using it with the little things—like letting him sneak in some snacks on set when he was instructed not to or when he wants to do certain stuff—because when it's something serious and you say 'no,' then he's quick to listen and settle when you've made your final decision. He knows you only have the best intentions when it comes to his safety and just him in general, so there's really no doubt on Tom's behalf when it comes to following you on that.
"Why me? Why not give the other boys a chance to be in the spotlight?" you proposed, not giving him the satisfaction of winning just yet.
Tom shrugged with a wide smile. "The fans love you," he hummed.
The reception of the last video was mostly positive. Maybe it was the fact that you've been with Tom for a couple years already.
Your relationship was private of course, but it wasn't a secret. It was relatively the both of you showing glimpses of it every now and then online. So, compared to when the news first broke out, this time was a bit calmer. There are still trolls and haters—they're always going to be there unfortunately—but you've learned to shut them out, turning your focus more on the ones who are very positive and supportive. They should be the only ones who should be given attention to, no point wasting your energy on random keyboard warriors.
"You mean they love it when I make fun of you?" you said, laughter escaping your lips soon after when Tom buried his face back on the crook of your neck as he groaned in dismay.
Let's just say his fans quite enjoyed how you handled him in the last video, the teasing, the banter, the whole lot. Tom hasn't been able to escape the countless clips that are circulating the good old internet. No matter which platform he uses, a clip or meme is always there to haunt him. Most of them vary from him screaming and wriggling in pain; laughing like a hyena while also wriggling in pain; the random facial expressions he's made; and even sometimes, a snapshot of you looking at him in great disappointment and/or embarrassment. That's just some among the plethora of other memes.
Tom had seen it coming of course, but it doesn't mean it's any less embarrassing, especially with how clueless he seemed when it came to women.
"Unfortunately, that too," he grumbled.
"Okay then, might as well give them more content," you teased, Tom pulling away again to gawk at you with a look of feign betrayal crossing his features. You could only laugh at that, giving his jutted out lip a kiss to replace it with one of his many sweet smiles. Despite you saying it in a joking manner, he can't really deny that that would happen either way. After all, no matter what he does, he will always be a walking meme.
Tom finally lets you go after one more peck on the cheek, guiding you towards the seat by the other end of the table soon after. He helped you in like the gentleman that he is, a kiss landing on top of your head once you were seated before he made his way towards his place.
"What are we doing this time?" you asked when Tom sat down on the chair across from you.
And as if on cue, Harry walked into the dining area with two bottles of gin on hand, Harrison following suit with a bowl of half-sliced limes along with Tuwaine with a bucket of ice and two Collins glasses.
"Truth or drink," Harry said with a wide grin, lifting the bottles of Aviation gin to further prove his point.
"You guys chose me to do this with him because I'm a lightweight, which means I'm more likely to talk, didn't you?" you said, narrowing your eyes at each of them as they placed their respective items right in front of you in the middle of the table.
All three boys gasped exaggeratedly at your accusation, shaking their heads as they made their way behind the camera, chorusing a bunched of:
"Oh no, of course not."
"That was not the plan."
"We would never."
You could only roll your eyes at them, playfully of course, turning back to Tom who was quick to throw his hands up in surrender once he took in your expression of pure suspicion.
"I swear, I just want to do this with you, plain and simple," he confessed, though his follow up sentence made you think that it wasn't as plain and simple. "But you are very funny when you have alcohol in your system."
"Does that mean I'm not when sober?" You raised your brow at the man across you, sitting straight up as you clasp your hands together, resting it on the table to seem serious.
Tom shook his head frantically. "No! You're still very funny sober!" he rushed. "Love, you know what I meant," he added with a whine, head dropping low once you let out a laugh, only lifting it back up to shoot you another pout. He can be quite gullible sometimes and you honestly love it, love teasing him about.
"Besides, it's a couples Q&A and the only couple here are you two so there aren't really any options. The only difference is that it has alcohol to spice things up a little," Harry said, now in his place behind the camera just like before.
"With equally spicy questions," Harrison added with a wriggle of his brows, coming back up on the head of the table to place a stack of white cards to which you assumed was where the questions were written.
"You guys wrote the questions didn't you? Okay, this is a set up," you joked.
"They're harmless questions I swear!" Harrison defended with a laugh before returning back to his place by the camera. Though knowing them for as long as you have, you've learned to never trust those words fully. It was highly expected that the questions aren't going to be simple, let alone safe for work.
"But if you're not comfortable doing it, it's totally fine, darling," Tom said, smiling sweetly as he grabbed your hands across the table and gave it a gentle, reassuring squeeze. He knows you have never been an avid drinker. As you've said, you are lightweight. So, if ever you wanted to back out, he's just making sure you know that you have the option to.
"No, I'm fine with it. This will be fun," you said, flashing him a true, reassuring smile of your own, squeezing his hand in return for good measure. "But can I at least have some juice or something? I'm not drinking gin straight," you added.
"Figured you'd say that," Tom said with a wide grin, rushing up from his seat and disappearing into the kitchen. He came back not long after with a bottle of orange juice on one hand all while holding a spoon and paring knife on the other. "Rollin' down the street, smokin' indo, sippin' on gin and juice," he sang the good old Snoop Dogg classic no matter how corny, placing the bottle juice right beside the gin on the head of the table.
You narrowed your eyes at your man. "You seem prepared Tom."
"Nope, I just know you too well," he hummed, giving you a sweet peck on the forehead before he was back on his seat across you.
"Right, let's give the people what they want," you said, rubbing your hands together with a wide smile.
It was Tom's turn to look at you skeptically. "Why do I have a feeling that we'll just take turns in exposing each other?"
You tilted your head at him with a grin, shrugging your shoulders and said,
"How bad can it be?"
***
"And we are rolling."
"What's up guys! Tom Holland here," he introduced with a loud clap. "I'm back with another video joined by none other than the gorgeous Y/N." You waved at the camera with a sweet smile at the mention of your name. "The rest of the gang are behind the camera as per usual," Tom added, the lads cheering at their cue unenthusiastically and totally not in sync, chuckles and giggles following soon after.
"You can feel the excitement in the room," Tom said sarcastically with a roll of his eyes. "Anyhow, since lovely Ryan Reynolds sent me a case of gin just recently, I thought; why not put it to good use?" Tom shot the camera a knowing look. "Hashtag not sponsored but should be!" he yelled, making you jump slightly at the sudden loud sound.
"Do you have to be so loud?" you grumbled, playfully covering your ears in the process.
"Oh, sorry love," Tom chuckled, shooting you a sweet smile before turning back to the camera, finger pointed at it as he said, "But Ryan, my DMs are always open."
"Always looking for someone to replace me," you sighed, shaking your head dejectedly as you turned to the camera with a deep frown.
"Ah, here we go," Tom groaned, shooting you a playful glare because he knows that the teasing would only get more and more prominent from here on out.
"What? You and I both know I've got a lot of competition," you said as a matter of fact, leaning back on your seat with arms crossed over your chest. "Mainly Jake G. and Harrison, with a couple of variations here and there but you get what I mean."
Tom shook his head at you with a teasing roll of his eyes. "Once again, my girlfriend everyone," he said to the lens with a tight lip smile before turning back to you with a deadpan expression. You only shrugged in response, flashing him an innocent smile.
"Anyway, a fan suggested this in the comments of the last video so today, we're going to be doing Truth or Drink," he continued, turning back to face the camera. "Rules are simple, we take turns on reading out the questions that are written on these cards right here"—Tom lifted the stack of white, rectangular cards before placing them back on the table—"and we either answer them truthfully or we take a drink."
"Oh and a little disclaimer," you paused as you looked at the camera. "The lads wrote the questions so we have no idea what's in the cards nor did we have any involvement in the choosing of certain topics which are possibly going to be discussed in this video," you added, feeling like it was a fact that needed to be said.
"Parental guidance is advised," Tom chuckled.
"They're not that bad you divs," Harrison grumbled.
Now you're certain on who wrote most of the questions, he's been keen on taking offense whenever anyone gets suspicious over them. "We'll be the judge of that," you stated, raising a brow at Harrison before turning back to Tom.
"Let's get right into it shall we?" Tom proposed. You gave him a nod in response, jutting out two thumbs up for good measure. "Ladies first," he said, flashing you a charming grin as he gestured towards the pile of cards.
You reached over to the pile, making sure to pick the card in the middle just to make sure that it was completely random. You adore the lads, but knowing how mischievous they can get, you've learned to always keep one eye open with regard to everything that they do. Plus, it was so easy to set it up for you to pick a certain question given that it was only you and Tom taking turns on picking a card.
"We are starting off with something a tad bit dark huh." You gave the lads a swift glance before turning to the card you had on hand. "If I killed someone would you help me cover it up?" you read out loud, placing the card on the discarded pile before your gaze landed on Tom who gave you a small, secretive nod 'yes' which only made you giggle.
Tom leaned forward as he rested his elbow on the marble surface, hand playing with his chin with his eyes on the ceiling to seem that he was deep in thought. He turned back to you and said, "Do we not get any context? Was it an accident or was it on purpose? Was it due to hate or fear? Was it justified?"
"It's a yes or no answer Tom," you laughed.
"Well then, you already know the answer but for legal purposes," Tom paused, reaching for the bucket of ice and putting some in his glass. He poured the gin on top of that and then added a dash of lime, swirling around the glass to mix them all together. "My lips are sealed," he chuckled, lifting the glass up to his lips and taking a drink. "Oh, that's good stuff," he commented, taking another sip before putting the glass back down.
"Hypothetically, if you were going to help, you'll probably be the one who'll get us caught if I'm being honest," you giggled to which Tom threw his head back with a laugh.
"Yeah, you'll tell me what you did, I'll get shocked and as we're getting stuff to you know, hypothetically hide the body, I'll go 'I can't believe you killed someone' in public and then someone will hear and call the police and we're done."
You burst out in a hearty laugh at that, nodding your head in agreement. "That's exactly how it's going to happen."
It was Tom's turn to pick a question, his grin growing wider as his eyes scanned the card in his fingers. "What's the most embarrassing thing you've done in front of me?" he asked, his features brightening in excitement because he already knows the answer. There wasn't really much to begin with other than that one incident that will always haunt you for the rest of your life.
"Do you want me to tell them the story?" you sighed, leaning back on your chair with palms flat on the table. It wasn't one of your finest moments that's for sure and Tom hasn't been letting you hear the end of it. In fact, it was one of his favourite stories involving you both.
"It's up to you, love. You don't have to if you don't want to." Tom shrugged with a smirk, reaching for your glass to get your drink made. "But that moment was so adorable for me though, embarrassing for you but very adorable for me," he added with a wink.
"Adorable or ego boosting?" you pointed out with a raise of your brow.
"Both," Tom laughed, adding some ice in your glass and pouring just the right amount of gin soon after.
You watched with an adoring smile as he poured in the orange juice, the sound of silverware and glass clinking together filling the air as he mixed up the liquids. He then squeezed a bit of lime in your drink, taking the paring knife soon after to slice up another lime in a thin circle, making a small slit in the middle so he can put it on the rim of your glass easily. Tom can be extra at times, of course he felt the need to decorate your drink, even when it wasn't exactly necessary but you wouldn't want it any other way.
"Look at you being a bartender," you teased, Tom looking up from his task to shoot you playful wink with a smug smirk to match.
"You love to see it."
You shrugged, not at all denying his claim because well, you do love seeing it.
"Here you go, mi lady," he hummed, handing you your beautifully decorated drink with a proud grin on his lips.
"Thank you, kind sir."
As much as how refreshing the cocktail looked in its cold glass and bright, orange colored glory, you know you had to be strategic with drinking. Because alcohol boosts your confidence, it makes you brave, it makes you say things you wish you hadn't when sober. And with you being lightweight, it isn't exactly ideal to be happy-go-lucky with it, especially knowing how these questions can go from one thing to another real quick.
You thought it's best to share embarrassing things that you can live with to keep the drinking at a minimum, rather than take too much alcohol too fast and say worse things down the line because you got somewhat tipsy or downright drunk. There's really no way of knowing how hard it hits given that different types of alcohol affect you in different ways.
"Okay, it was when we first met, which obviously doesn't make it any less embarrassing, first impressions and all that," you started, sitting straight up as your fingers drummed around the cool surface of your glass. "Me and a friend of mine were at this park and decided it would be fun to rent out these bikes to get around quicker, so we did. Lo and behold, Tom and Harrison were also at said park—"
"Oh yeah, I remember this," Harrison laughed. "This is going to be good."
You shot the blonde lad a quick glare before continuing. "Luck wasn't on my side that day—well, depends on how you look at things because I did meet Tom and seem to have gotten far," you laughed towards the camera, giving Tom a swift glance who was quick to lock eyes with you as he nodded agreeably with a chuckle. "But add that to me being very clumsy and simply put, I fell off the bike right in front of him," you sighed dejectedly, heat coating your cheeks as the lads chuckled in their seats, purely in amusement and not at all in a demeaning way.
"Go on love, let's hear the full thing," Tom encouraged, sitting back on his chair with his arms crossed over his chest to relax, attention fully on you as if he hasn't heard this story many times before. He genuinely does love hearing it. As you've said, it was one of his favourites.
"I'm getting there," you grumbled, narrowing your eyes at Tom who only flashed you an adorable, bright smile, knowing that if he does that, you can't stay mad at him. With a another sigh, you continued, "As we were riding our bikes, we saw him and Harrison sitting on this random bench from afar doing, I don't know, maybe they were on a date or something—"
"Darling, don't try and steer the topic here," Tom laughed. You stuck out your tongue at him—yes, very mature—his laughter only growing louder at your reaction.
"I'm a big fan of the Marvel movies, so obviously, I knew who he was. I was trying to keep my cool, you know, I didn't want to embarrass myself in front of him and thought I'll just ride pass, don't want to disturb whatever they had going on. But as soon as we got near to where they were sat, he looked towards my direction and we made eye contact—"
"The power I have," Tom crooned with a smug smile, earning a pointed eye-roll from you.
"Oh shut up. You know that wasn't the sole reason why I fell," you scoffed. "The chains on my bike went loose so I had no full control over it. We weren't going slowly as well because this friend of mine thought it was a good idea to one up each other so we kept going faster and faster, racing towards who knows what.
"So, my next option was to just plant my foot on the ground to stop it right? But as I've said, luck wasn't on my side that day. Before I could even do it, a rock went under the front wheel—which I didn't see given that I was distracted, you lot know why—and completely took me off balance and the bike went sideways real quick that I didn't have any time to react at all. And...did I roll a few times?" You turned to your boyfriend.
"Twice," he confirmed, a sympathetic smile on his lips as he tilted his head at you sweetly.
"Now, I don't see why you find this story adorable." You narrowed your eyes at your man.
"Not the actual accident, darling. It's what happened after that I found adorable. You were so cute being all shy and embarrassed," Tom defended with a pout. "And you know for a fact that whenever I see you with the smallest scrape or cut I panic and fuss over you immediately."
"You do. A bit too overdramatically," you giggled. It was a bit much sometimes how he worries but that's just Tom being the caring and overprotective boyfriend that he is. "Anyway, so yes, I rolled on the ground twice but all I remember was that I was already lying on my back, watching the sky while my knees, forearms up to my elbows and palms were burning. Then I saw Tom approaching and I swear I was just wishing that the ground would swallow me up right then and there," you finished.
"I quickly rushed to her aid, because you know, I'm Spider-Man," Tom added with a cocky shrugged, arms open wide as if to showcase himself.
There was a loud, collective groan from the lads which earned a laugh from you and a sound of pure protest from Tom.
"It's true!" he exclaimed. "Anyway, she then went, 'oh, my knight and shining armour, my handsome Prince Charming'," Tom gushed, voice at a higher pitch with the utmost exaggeration as he placed the back of his hand over his forehead. "And I went, 'don't worry princess, I'm here to save you,' and then we kissed and lived happily ever after," he concluded with the cheekiest smile.
"We remember this story very differently." You shook your head at him with a hearty laugh. This boy is always something else. "But fine, I'll give you the Prince Charming part because you did look like it.
"What you said was, 'miss, are you alright?' which was very formal of you, especially with the accent." You turned to the camera with a suggestive wiggle of your brows, making Tom drop his head shyly with a chuckle as his cheeks turned slightly pink. "And no, we didn't kiss. You don't kiss people you just met Thomas, get a hold of yourself. He helped me up and was kind enough to offer to take me to the hospital which wasn't needed since it was just a few cuts and scrapes but still insisted that I get checked. Who knew you'd be overprotective since day one," you laughed.
Tom shrugged with a chuckle. "We got to know each other while in the hospital and after she got cleaned up, I thought, I liked talking to her and I really don't want to say goodbye just yet. So, I invited her to lunch which she surprisingly said yes," he teased, sarcasm laced in his tone at his last sentence as he shot the camera a knowing and smug look. You kicked him lightly under the table, the action catching him off guard making him let out a yelp.
"It was more of me being polite because you helped and that. Didn't want to seem rude by saying no," you said, Tom gasping in full offense at your words. You let out a laugh as you rushed, "I'm kidding! Of course I wanted to go to lunch with you. It was impossible to say no because you've been really sweet and a real gentleman that day. And well, it was fun hanging out with you."
Tom smiled widely at that, nothing but pure love coating his features as he held your gaze, hand sneaking over to yours that was on the table and giving it a quick but loving squeeze.
"Where did Harrison go?" Harry wondered, the blonde boy suddenly turning silent and surely enough when you gave him a swift glance, he was already blushing.
"I had my friend with me, Tom had Harrison, you do the math," you said plainly, laughter laced in your tone.
"Oh, so you got some that day," Tuwaine chuckled, nudging the boy beside him with his elbow.
"Shut up, Tuwaine," Harrison grumbled, swatting away his friend lightly.
"But in conclusion, I am a superhero in real life," Tom stated proudly, swiping away the imaginary dust that was lying on his shoulder. He turned to the camera with a bright and wide smile. "But I do thank that bike every day."
"A bit sadistic but okay," you added, looking at Tom skeptically with a scrunch of your nose.
"No! I meant we wouldn't have gotten to know each other if that didn't happen," Tom rushed, lips turning into a pout when you only did nothing but laugh. "You're mean."
"You're just too adorable not to pick on," you giggled, his pout turning more prominent at your words.
You so badly wanted to get up off your seat and give him a proper kiss, but those things are always reserved privately. You two had never been big with public displays of affection, just the casual holding hands and occasional hugs. There are a few instances where you'll sneak a quick kiss while hanging out with friends but that's different compared to it being on tape for the whole world to see later on.
"Anyhow, what's the most embarrassing thing that you have done in front of me?" You asked back, your turn to grin wide because you know which story it was going to be, the way Tom's cheeks were quick to be dusted red was a clear indication that you were right.
"I'm smooth as hell, would never embarrass myself in front of a lady," he said casually, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned back on his chair, all cool and suave.
"Oh shut up and tell the story," you said with a playful roll of your eyes, Tom letting out a shy chuckle before he leaned on the table.
"Right, it was our second date and I split my trousers open," he said, short and sweet, though his blush was already deepening because Tom knows the sharing won't stop there.
"Wait, how open?" Tuwaine asked.
"Like full on, centre to back, underwear and inner thighs with a bit of butt showing open. It would have been a bit better if I wore black pants—boxers to the American people—and black trousers right? But me being unlucky, I went for light-coloured denim jeans and black pants that day so it's fully obvious that I did ripped my trousers open," he chuckled shyly, hand going to rub at his shoulder, body slightly crouched as he refused to look away from his glass of gin.
"Go on Thomas, let's hear the full thing," you prodded, throwing his previous words right back at him.
He lifted his head up to shoot you a playful glare, though sat straighter anyway, elbows now on the table with his hands clasped together as he got ready to tell his story. "We were well underway our second date, a simpler one which was a walk in a somewhat less crowded park—"
"What's with you two and parks?" Harrison pointed out with a chuckle.
"Disaster just waiting to happen as you can tell," Tom laughed.
"We've steered clear from parks after all these incidents," you joked with a giggle.
"I did a flip and didn't land the right way was basically what happened," Tom continued, turning to the camera with a look of dismay. "We were walking by a couple of street dancers who were practicing a routine and they were doing all sorts of flips and tricks. She stopped walking completely and watched—wait, correction, stared at this certain bloke who was doing backflips—"
"I was not staring," you butted in. "I was just watching him do his thing and said how cool it was. And why are you making it seem like it's my fault?" you gasped, placing a hand over your heart, feign offence crossing your features.
"I'm not!" Tom laughed, hands up in surrender before he crossed his arms over his chest. "All I'm saying was that I was trying to impress you, which is why I offered to show you a flip. And as everyone in this room knows, I do the stupidest things when trying to impress a girl, especially when I like her that much."
"I was already impressed by you as is Tom, you didn't need to do a flip," you said as a matter of fact, small giggles escaping your lips as you looked at him with nothing but pure adoration. Tom felt his heart melt at the sight and more by your words. "And besides, I already knew you could do it. But somehow you felt the need to prove yourself after you saw me complimenting that dancer," you added.
"It's what you call ego, Tom," Harry laughed.
"Shut up, Harry." Tom shot his brother a glare though chuckled right after because it was in fact a bit true.
It was the silliest thing thinking back on it now, how he just said 'you want to see me do a flip?' out of the blue. You furrowed your brows at him in response, though your smile was laced with amusement. He just wanted to impress you as he'd said. And fine, maybe his ego got struck at teeny bit, and maybe he felt a little jealous that your attention got torn off of him because he truly did like you that much.
But at the end of the day, even though he had a little mishap, it all worked out so he wasn't at all complaining. "Anyway, so I did the flip, completely disregarding the fact that my shoes were slippy and my trousers were tight. I did land upright and not on my face this time so that's something," Tom chuckled. "But my right foot slipped so I was full on going on a wide split which I normally can't do since I am not flexible enough and proceeded to fall on my bum.
"The moment I heard the sound I instantly knew and just went, 'oh no' and remained on the ground because I didn't know what to do then. I was already embarrassed because I slipped, do I really want to tell her I tore open my trousers too?" Tom laughed timidly, the blush on his cheeks turning redder as he rubbed the back of his neck in utter embarrassment.
"I kind of knew right away though because I did hear something rip," you giggled. "He then just slowly stood up, hands behind, flat on his bum and said, 'I split my trousers open' in the smallest voice like a kid who's scared to tell their mum they fell or they'll get scolded. Plus his face was beet red, just like now." You pointed towards your boyfriend, who in turn stuck his tongue out at you as his blush turned into an even deeper shade of crimson.
"Thank God I wore a jacket that day and I was able to at least hide it until we got back to the car or else someone would've clocked it, took a picture, posted it on the internet and it would've made things much worse," Tom pointed out with a chuckle, glad that there was no paparazzi or it would've been a nightmare. "And the fact that you tried so hard not to laugh but still failed made me feel so embarrassed that I was quick to think that that was it. I ruined my chances, no more third date," he added as he turned to you with a small pout.
"I couldn't help laughing because it was the most adorable thing how you went from being all confident and cocksure on doing a flip to this shy boy who refused to look me in the eyes without turning even redder," you said, pure amusement laced in your tone. "But no, that incident made me like you more, it was just too endearing. Third date never left the table after that," you concluded with a sweet smile which only made Tom's grin grow wider.
"Even though she laughed, she was so sweet and kind about it. We had to cut our date shor—actually no, we didn't. We went back to your place and decided to do a movie marathon instead," Tom said fondly, face glowing with joy as the memory brought nothing but warmth across his chest.
"Yeah, with you wearing a pair of my sweatpants," you giggled, mirroring his expression as your mind recalled the sweet moment of you and him, simply cuddled up on the couch.
"And that's on getting the girl by splitting your trousers open," Tom said with a smug smile, pointing at the camera as he shot it a knowing look with a wriggle of his brows.
"And getting the boy by falling off a bike," you added, doing exactly what he did as you turned to face the lens.
"Look at us," Tom gushed, looking back at you with a smile, reaching across the table to take your hand in his. "Hey, look at us."
"Look at us. Who would've thought?" you giggled, giving his hand a squeeze in return.
You were always quick to catch on what he was trying to do that Tom couldn't help but smile widely, heart melting ten times over at the thought of you knowing him so well. "Not me," Tom chuckled, letting go of your hand and holding up his palm for a high-five to which you gladly obliged with laughs of your own.
"You two are made for each other," Harry chuckled with a shake of his head, now just getting that you two were recreating the famous Paul Rudd meme.
"My turn right?" Tom asked. You nodded with a hum as you pushed the pile of cards towards him. He let out a loud scoff once he read the question, his reaction making you raise a brow in both curiosity and slight dread. "Be honest," he said as he looked up from the paper, gaze landing on you. "Who do you love more, me," he paused for dramatic effect, narrowing his eyes at you before continuing, "Or Tessa?"
You let out a small groan as you hang your head low, fingers tracing the side of your cold glass. You let out a sigh of defeat before you met Tom's expectant gaze. "I can't possibly answer that question," you grumbled, bringing the glass up to your lips as you took a swift drink before placing it back down.
"That was such a tiny sip," Harrison pointed out.
"Alright, alright, I guess we can tell who the bad influence here is," you said with a teasing roll of your eyes, but still took another drink anyway, taking in more of it this time around. You just want to play the game fair and square. "You actually made that really well. It's really good," you hummed at Tom as you placed your drink back down, the lad grinning widely in response.
"Why thank you, darling," Tom crooned, voice smooth with a pride-filled smile, pushing over the pile of cards back in the middle of the table to get you to ask the next question.
"Okay, who wrote this?" You turned to the boys behind the camera with a raise of your brow. "If the alcohol wasn't going to do it, then this will definitely get the video restricted, unless you're going to bleep some words out?" You turned to Harry.
"I've got that covered," Harry laughed.
Glancing back at the card you had on hand, you asked, "If our sex life was porn, what genre would it be?" You looked up at Tom to see him try his best to hold back a smirk.
"Nope, not answering that," he laughed with a shake of his head as he lifted his glass off the table. "Mainly because there are too many genres that it would fit for me to only pick one," Tom muttered softly against his drink as he looked at you through his lashes. His words were muffled but you still heard it, you were closer to him after all. You felt your cheeks heat up at that, even more so when your man shot you a teasing wink before downing the shot of gin not long after.
Tom set his glass down and reached over to take another card. "What does your family think of me?" he asked with a clear of his throat.
"Well..." You slowly dragged your drink closer to you, Tom's mouth falling agape that you couldn't help but burst into a hearty laugh. "I'm kidding! You already know how much they love you," you said. "I mean, my parents call him 'son' so." You shrugged as you turned to the camera. Tom puffed out his chest all proud with a very smug smile on his lips. You rolled your eyes, sighing as you added, "They probably even love you more than they love me."
Tom chuckled, "My family loves you more than they love me, too—"
"I can vouch for that," Harry intervened.
"Thanks, Harry," Tom said sarcastically, flashing his brother a forced smile. Turning back to you, he finished, "So, I guess we're even."
You could only nod with a soft giggle, reaching over to the stack of cards to keep the pace going. "Lads! What's with these kinds of questio—you know what, I don't even expect any less from you guys," you sighed, pursing your lips as you re-read the question again before sitting straight up and looked into Tom's eyes. "What would you do if you caught me watching porn?" you asked.
"Watch it with you and help get it done, duh?" he answered without hesitation, leaning back on his chair as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Have done a couple times actually," Tom murmured, somewhat to himself, though not really since everyone in the room—and pretty sure the camera—heard it.
"Tom!" you hissed.
You felt your body tingle, legs instinctively closing together as the countless moments it happened replayed itself inside your brain. Although what he said wasn't false, it wasn't the full truth either. He didn't exactly catch you red handed, never did since you don't watch porn often.
All you did was asked him—merely out of curiosity—what type he mostly watches. Your question sparked an idea in his head which led to you sitting in between his legs, bare back against his naked chest as the laptop sat right in front of you both with the video of his choice.
Tom then made his way with you while you watched, making sure you never take your eyes off the couple on screen or else. He was always fully in control over you every time you do it, his fingers sometimes delicate, mostly rough, touch hot and heavy all over your skin, lips warm on your neck, teeth sharp against your bare shoulder as he brings you to the edge over and over and over with nothing but his hands. And once the video ends, Tom will take it upon himself to re-enact the whole of it with you—if you could still take it of course—bringing what was on screen to real life, full recreation from start to finish.
Best believed you're properly blissed out at the stop of every play.
Your boyfriend's eyes widened once he realized the actual volume of his voice, face turning a deep shade of red, sitting straight abruptly as he rushed, "No! Wait—dammit." Tom casted his eyes down shyly when the boys let out exaggerated gasps and sounds of disapproval, a telltale sign that they already heard it. "I'm sorry, darling." He met your gaze again as he shot you a sheepish smile, his head tilted to the side guiltily to which you only responded with a shake of your head.
Typical Thomas.
"Bleurgh, too much info," Harrison gagged, the other boys following suit with their own sounds of repulsion.
"Oh fuck off you divs. You guys wrote the questions so obviously, you wanted to find out," Tom countered, shooting the lads a glare each.
"We didn't expect you to actually answer it!" Harry defended.
"We're cutting that whole part out, no way that's going up online," you grumbled, eyes staring at nothing but your drink as you tried to hide the obvious embarrassment that's coated your features.
Tom reached across the table to give your hand a squeeze, you meeting his gaze to see him mouth a gentle 'I'm sorry.' You flashed him a sweet smile, squeezing his hand in return to tell him that it was alright. It wasn't live so there wasn't any real harm done, aside from future jokes from the boys. That you can deal with than having that confidential information on the internet which will then follow you around for the rest of eternity.
Letting go of your hand, Tom sat straighter and turned to the camera. "If you guys are wondering why there's a jump cut and my face is suddenly so red, it's because I spilled something I shouldn't have that we had to cut it out. And no, it's something you'll never find out," he chuckled shyly, knowing that once the video goes out, fans are going to be so annoyed and will pester him—and everyone in the room—nonstop to try and find out what was cut.
Better that, than embarrassing you in front of millions though, so he'll deal with them no problem. Because as promised, if you weren't comfortable with it staying in the video, then it gets cut out, no questions asked. You and what you're comfortable with always come first in Tom's book.
"Yet again, thank God we didn't do this live," you muttered with a playful roll of your eyes.
Tom shot you one last apologetic smile before he cleared his throat, "Right, moving on." He shifted in his seat and took another card from the pile. "What's the one thing you'd change about me?" he asked.
"Your height," you answered without missing a beat. You chewed on your lip to suppress a grin but still failed miserably, especially when Tom looked at you with his jaw hanging and his eyes wide open.
A chorus of 'ooh's erupted from the boys which only prompted a laugh from you, the joyous sound growing louder when they started to rub it to Tom even more.
"Pfft, apply ice on the burnt area," Harry said as he blew out his cheeks.
"Mate, she's just bodied you with that," Tuwaine tutted at Tom, rising up from his seat soon after to offer you a high-five. You gladly obliged with a laugh, Tom gawking at you with utmost betrayal on his face.
"You're lucky you're very cute, especially when you laugh," Tom grumbled as he shot you a playful glare. The crinkles on the corner of your eyes deepened as you only smiled brightly at him with a tilt of your head, which honestly made you look even more endearing. He could never be mad at you, too whipped to hold a grudge no matter how much you tease him. And besides, that's all there is to it, nothing but teasing jokes and banter.
"If I were you, Tom, I'd start taking those growth pills before she starts to question why she's even with you," Harrison proposed jokingly which earned boisterous laughter from the rest of the gang.
"You lot are so fucking overdramatic. I'm not that short," Tom quipped with a roll of his eyes, gaze landing back on you with his famous pout now in play yet again. "And babe, it's a truth or drink video, not a roast me video," he stated, palms flat on cool marble as he looked at you with puppy-dog eyes.
"I'm joking! I'm joking," you rushed with a giggle. "I wouldn't change a single thing. You know I love you, just the way you are," you sang the last line, though your voice held nothing but sincerity as you reached over to give his hand a loving squeeze. Tom nodded with a sigh, though never did he doubt your words, knowing it deep in his bones that physical traits would never outweigh how much you love him, no matter what.
"Right, let's keep this going," you said as you took another card. "Who is smarter, me or you?" you asked.
"Me," Tom said proudly.
"Well, that's a lie," you objected.
Tom couldn't help but laugh at that, nodding at you as he chuckled, "It's you, obviously. Have you seen the last video?"
"Hmm, I don't know, I think Tom's smarter. I mean, you decided to date him, Y/N, which isn't exactly the brightest decision," Harry inferred, earning a loud gasp from his older brother.
"Excellent point," you agreed, your boyfriend's head whipping towards your direction with nothing but absolute offense written on his face.
"Babe! You're supposed to be on my side!" Tom exclaimed. "Why are we roasting me all of a sudden?" he complained.
"You're just too fun to pick on," you laughed, Tom's bottom lip jutting out at your words. "Especially when you do that, too cute," you pointed out, the apples of Tom's cheek turning pink as a smile grew on his lips at the compliment. "But I am smarter," you concluded, shooting the camera a wink.
"Will not refute," Tom chuckled, keeping the flow of the game as he took another card. "If you weren't with me, who of my brothers would you consider dating?" he said, voice pitching higher at the last few words. A look of downright disgust covered Tom's face immediately as he looked at the boys behind the camera who were snickering like the mischievous little shits that they are. "You lot are grim."
You matched Tom's expression, scrunching your nose as you shook your head quickly. Having been with Tom long enough, you now see the three of the Holland boys as your own brothers, so the mere thought of dating any of them is just—
"I'm not even going to think about it," you grumbled as you took a sip of your cocktail and then picked a card right away. "Who's the celebrity who you were the most disappointed with when you met them?" you continued swiftly, a smile on your lips as you looked at Tom who let out a sigh.
"You know I can't answer that," he stated in a matter-of-fact tone, your smile growing wider as you picked up the bottle of gin and refilled his glass. "Thank you, darling," he chuckled with a shake of his head, taking a drink right after.
"Is there anyone in my friend group, famous or not, that you do not like?" Tom continued with a raise of his brow, gaze steady on you.
You emptied your glass—that was still half full—without a single word and placed it back down with a small burp. "Oh, excuse me," you cleared your throat with a laugh.
Tom's brows furrowed at you in mere curiosity, gesturing for your glass so he can remake you another drink. You slid it over to him with a soft 'thank you' and a sweet smile. He started opening up the bottle of juice though his eyes were still on you, narrowed in pure skepticism.
"Who?"
"Not part of the question, Tom," you said, flashing him an innocent smile
"I know who it is," Harry coughed fakely.
"Me too," Tuwaine added with a fake cough of his own.
"It's Harrison because he's trying to take you away from me," you commented, laughing at how the blonde lad gasped in utter protest.
"That's a lie because I know who it is too," Harrison defended.
"So, everyone knows except me?" Tom mused, rolling his eyes in the process.
"What else is new?" you giggled with a shrugged, Tom only sighing as he shot you yet another pout. This boy never ceases to use it since he knows you always swoon whenever he does. 'I'll tell you later,' you mouthed, making him nod with a proud smile.
You gently leaned back on your seat, closing your eyes when you felt a little woozy. You took in slow, deep breaths, the marble cold against your palms as your body started to grow warmer from head to toe.
Maybe downing that drink wasn't the best idea.
"You okay, darling?" Tom asked sweetly, tilting his head at you in worry as he went to take your hand in his. His brows knitted together when your skin felt unusually warm in his palms.
"Yeah," you giggled, opening your eyes to meet his concern-filled brown ones, flashing him a reassuring smile and a nod to match as you gave his hand a squeeze. "Just the alcohol slowly kicking in."
"Want to take a minute, sweetheart?"
"No, I'm good. Go on and ask the question bubba," you prompted as you beamed at him, Tom's heart melting at the beautiful curve on your features and more by the sound of that sweet nickname. Although, he knew that you'd reached your calm before the storm.
You're always smiley and extra sweet when you start to get a little tipsy. But from here on out, especially if you decide to take even more alcohol, you start switching from calm to giddily energetic. That's when the words would start flowing out your lips before your brain could even register what you've just said.
Tom replaced your hand with a white card once he was sure you were fine. A cheeky grin erupted on his face as he asked, "What's your favourite sex position?"
You pursed your lips, eyes landing on the ceiling, fingers drumming on the marble surface of the table as you pondered on it for a second. Tom watched you intently, a soft chuckle escaping him when you met his gaze again with a sweet yet shy smile.
"I've got three though," you said, mostly to him but in a not-so-hush tone. Your mind and your mouth don't cooperate sometimes when there's alcohol in the mix.
"Different one for a different mood," Tom hummed with a smirk, finishing up your drink with a squeeze of lime, mixing it up before sliding it back towards you. "Just say one or take a drink, darling."
"I need to slow down with drinking or else I'll be saying much worse things. I can already feel my filter shutting down," you breathed out, tilting your head to the side as you gazed at Tom for a bit of help. "But do I really want this out in the world?"
"Oh, go on Y/N, live a little," Harrison prodded with nothing but utter mischief in his eyes.
You don't know why but somehow, Harrison words were the last straw for that burst of confidence to suddenly overflow. Boldness coated your every nerve as you squeezed your eyes shut and straight up blurted,
"Doggy."
Tom's eyes grew wide, both of his brows rising as he looked at you surprised. Yes, doggy was one of your—and his—favourites, he already knew that, what surprised him was you actually saying it out loud. Although he was swift to turn cocky as he leaned back on his seat, arms crossed over his chest while he kept his gaze steady on you.
As you peaked one eye, you saw that certain smirk of his now playing on his pink lips, one you only ever see privately. You felt your face heat up at that, added from the alcohol and embarrassment. The warmth was quick to spread to the rest of your body though, with the way he was looking at you, it was so hard for it not too. And as your eyes fully soaked him in, gaze traveling from his handsome face sporting that teasing smirk to his bulging biceps, the temperature could only rise. Your senses was now somewhat heightened that you were able to notice every single thing that made your man so fucking attractive and downright hot.
Since when did his hoodie grow even tighter? And damn, why is it so hot all of a sudden? It's probably the alcohol, or mainly just Tom, or simply both.
"Favourite type of porn!" you hear someone from the gang call out—probably Harrison since he's been causing trouble from the very start—interrupting your thoughts. With the alcohol in your system, just as expected, your brain genuinely forgot to take control of your tongue before you could even tell yourself: 'don't!'
"Sometimes hardcore," you let out, slapping your hand over your mouth immediately as your eyes grew wide. You quickly met Tom's eyes, his brown orbs glowing with shock, amusement and a sprinkle of lust. He gave you a soft nod with a soft smile in response, confirming that yes, you said it out loud, and yes it was already too late. "Oh no, this was what I meant when I needed to slow down on alcohol," you groaned, rubbing your hand over your warm face before looking back across your man with a pout.
"Aye! Hardcore doggy yeah?" Harrison cheered teasingly, moving towards Tom and giving his best friend a pat on the shoulder. Tom threw his head back with a laugh, face red but the look of utmost pride was also there. Harrison swiftly offered his fist to Tom, to which the brunette gladly indulged, their knuckles colliding as chuckles escaped the two mates.
You let out a choked laugh as your eyes widened in surprise, jaw going slack with your face heating up even more. "Did you guys just fist bump to that?"
"I mean." Tom shrugged, throwing his hands up with the smuggest grin, causing you to shake your head dejectedly with a groan. You shot Harrison a pointed glare when he went back to his seat, still snickering to his heart's content as if his master plan was in the works.
What a little shit.
"I'm definitely not going to let my parents watch this video," you mumbled with a roll of your eyes.
"I've got a question for Tom though," Tuwaine started, though the glimmer in his eyes told you it wasn't a clean one. "Do you grab it or do you smack it?"
Tom wheezed before erupting into a very rowdy laugh, hands slapping on his thigh as his body shook in nothing but pure enjoyment, his face red from a mixture of embarrassment, glee and the alcohol.
"Oh my—right! Next question!" you squeaked, not giving your boyfriend any time to answer as you attempted to swiftly move on.
"Wait, wait," Tom breathed out as he slowly calmed down, getting up from his seat as he went over to your side. "Harry stop recording for a sec," he called out to his younger brother before he gestured for you to turn until your back was facing the camera.
Tom crouched down in front of you, hands on your knees with a sweet, reassuring smile on his lips. "We'll edit out the parts you're not comfortable with to stay in the vid, alright?" he stated softly.
You nodded with a smile of your own, taking his hand in yours as you played with his fingers. "I'm not opposed to keeping the last two questions since everyone has their favourite position and type of porn. It's normal," you hummed, tilting your head at him as you added, "You saying you've helped me with, you know, that was much more private though, 'cause it's our thing."
"I know, I'm sorry, love," Tom apologized, voice soft but coated with sincerity as his hand went up to cup your face lovingly, brown eyes gazing up into yours with just the same emotions. "We're cutting that part out, I promise."
"But you think your fans would take these questions well?" you queried, leaning into his touch in a way that made Tom's heart do flips inside his chest.
He nodded. "Yeah, I think it's fine. The video is going to be age restricted anyway. And besides, we're both adults, so there's nothing wrong with it," he explained. You hummed in agreement, leaning your head on his hand as you closed your eyes with a soft sigh, your skin very warm against his palm. Tom moved closer to give your lips a sweet peck. "Want some water angel?"
"No, I'm good." You smiled, Tom nodding as he mirrored your grin, giving your lips another kiss before he stood back to his full height and then sat back on his seat.
Shooting Harry the go signal to start recording again, Tom chuckled, "Sorry, needed to cool down for a sec after that." He turned towards the camera, tugging at the collar of his hoodie as he blew out his cheeks to get a point across.
You could only roll your eyes at your man, his laugh growing louder at your reaction. Swiftly taking a card from the pile, you continued with the game. "Is this going to be the theme from here on out, lads?" you asked, eyeing the boys behind the camera suspiciously before you turned back to Tom. "Is there something in the bedroom you'd like to try that you haven't told me?"
Tom's cheeks turned even redder at the question, completely shying away now as his hand went to rub at his shoulder. "I can't think of one right now," he muttered as he looked at you sheepishly. "But no, I'm not answering that since we talk about that off camera anyway," Tom settled with a timid chuckle, refilling his glass and taking a drink of the gin soon after.
"Your turn," you giggled, pushing the pile towards him.
"Oh, okay. What a way to shift the topic," Tom breathed out, scanning the card one more time as he sat up straighter. "If I was in a coma how long would you wait for me?" he asked, meeting your gaze with a tender smile.
"I'll keep waiting for you until you wake up, no matter how long," you answered, without even a single inch of doubt, despite the slight shake in your voice as your eyes started to well up. "Never giving up on you."
"Darling," Tom cooed softly with a pout, the screeching sound of his chair echoing around the space as he pushed his seat back. He went back over to your side quickly, remaining on his feet as he leaned down to engulf you in a tight and warm embrace, swaying you side to side in the most comforting way as he whispered sweet nothings against your hair.
You buried your face in his chest with a shaky breath, the material of his hoodie soft against your cheek. You willed your brain not to think much of it, to not dwell on that thought and focus more on the Tom's warmth that's coated you right now. Or else you'll end up a bawling mess, and with the alcohol in your system, it's not a good idea to start crying now.
Your man pulled away gently with a charming smile, cupping your face with both hands as he towered over your seated form. "I'd do the exact same, just so you know," he hummed, brown eyes locked with yours, his thumbs caressing your cheeks fondly before he dipped his head to capture your lips in a loving kiss. You let out a sweet sigh as you melt at the feeling of his soft lips on yours, mind and heart at ease at familiar warmth. The gesture wasn't fully caught on camera though given that you were turned at the opposite direction.
"I love you," you hummed against his lips.
Tom chuckled sweetly, giving you a few more pecks on the lips before pulling away completely, staring right into your eyes as he whispered, "And I love you."
With that he went back to his seat again, flashing you one of his many charming grins before he turned to the group behind the camera.
"You lot are onto something I can tell," Tom said as he raised a brow at the lads who suspiciously grew quiet, looking everywhere in the room but at you two.
Not thinking much of it, you swiftly took another card and read the question. "What would you do if you suddenly get a call that I was gone?" you trailed off at the end of your sentence, brows knitting together as you turned to the group behind the camera. "Guys, this is a cruel question."
"Oh," Tom faltered, smile slowly slipping away from his face as he casted his eyes at his drink.
"Tom, you don't have to answer it," you called out softly, frown deep on your lips as you reached over to take both his hands in yours. But it was already too late when he squeezed your hand tightly, lifting his head back up to meet your gaze and you felt your heart ache. That's when you saw that his mind was already there, brown orbs glossed up as he let out a shaky breath.
"I'd literally shut down," he croaked. "I-I don't know what'd I do if that happens. I just can't imagine my life without you. I—" he stopped, head dropping as his voice broke.
"Oh Tom, come here," you cooed as you immediately got out of your seat and rounded the table, turning him around and away from shot for a bit of privacy. You squatted in between his legs that were spread apart to be much closer to him, gently cupping his face with both your hands so that you were now within eye level. "Hey, look at me," you whispered when you were met by eyes that were screwed shut.
With a deep intake of breath, Tom willed his eyes to open. He looked at you with a small smile playing on his lips, heart steadying at the sight of your beautiful orbs boring into his own. He leaned forward to close the distance between you two, just so he could feel your lips on his. Tom badly needed to. A soft satisfied sigh erupted out your chest as your hand took home on his warm cheek.
"I'm still here bubba. I'm not going anywhere," you hummed against his lips before giving him warm kisses all over his face that made him stifle out a small laugh. You pulled away a little with a loving smile, wiping away the few tears that sat on his skin with your thumb, your touch gentle and warm.
"I love you so much, you know that?" Tom whispered as he looked at you fondly, nudging the tip of his nose with yours in a wholesome manner.
"I love you too, you sweet, soft boy," you giggled, placing a sweet peck on his lips before pulling him in for a hug. You lifted your head up to shoot each of the boys a sharp glare, the three cowering away in their seats as they each said their soft apologies.
Pulling away with a smile, you cupped Tom's face with a hum, "Better?"
"Loads," Tom sighed with a sweet smile, leaning in for one last peck before he lets you go back to your seat. "You purposely put that in there to make me cry didn't you?" Tom spoke, narrowing his eyes at boys who only shrugged in feign innocence. "You lot are evil I tell you."
"Now let's get back on a lighter note!" you exclaimed, pushing the cards towards Tom since it was his turn to ask.
Tom pursed his lips as his brows furrowed at the question. "If you could sleep with any person in the world, who would it be?" he wondered, eyes locking with yours in warning. "Now, careful with your answer, love," he hummed.
"Is that a threat Holland?" you challenged with a raise of your brow.
"I'm just saying, I may already know or will meet this person in the futur—"
"Chris Hemsworth," you blurted, Tom's mouth falling open as he gawked at you in shock. "I'm kidding," you rushed with a hearty laugh.
"Are you though?" Tom doubted, squinting at you suspiciously.
You bit your bottom lip as you held his gaze, Tom letting out a loud gasp when you suddenly took a drink all while maintaining eye contact with him.
"I'm going to have a word with you later missy," he grumbled, voice suddenly an octave deeper, somewhat a soft growl, one that you felt down to your core.
You shifted in your seat with a clear of your throat, shooting him an innocent smile as you said, "To be fair, you did say—publicly may I add—that you'd sleep with Hemsworth too when you did fuck, marry and kill with the three Chrises so, roll the clip!"
Tumblr media
Tom shook his head at you with a playful roll of his eyes. "Touché," he sighed, brows furrowed in confusion when you suddenly covered your mouth.
"Oops, I just realized I said the F-word, sorry Harry," you said meekly, a certain smile on your lips which guaranteed that you were now dancing onto drunken territory. Tom knows you like the back of his hand, if the way you were smiling wasn't enough then, the simple look in your eyes would let him know that the alcohol has fully hit you this time.
"It's alright. One bleep word is nothing compared to last week's video. And it's not like this video has been clean anyway," the young twin chuckled.
"So, Fuck Hemsworth, who are you marrying and who are you killing?" Tuwaine asked.
"Marry Evans, Kill Pratt," you answered promptly.
Tom leaned back on his seat as he crossed his arms over his chest, running his tongue over his teeth slowly all while staring you down. "That's a quick answer Y/N," he hummed, shooting you a teasing glare.
"Oh please, yours was quick too, Thomas," you retorted, crossing your arms over your chest as you mirrored him, never backing down from his stare even though it was making you feel certain things.
"Wait, if you're marrying Evans and killing Pratt, and I'm marrying Pratt and killing Evans, does that mean we're set out to kill each other's husband?" Tom started as he leaned forward and towards the table.
"So, if you were successful in killing Evans, and I was successful in killing Pratt, that means we're both widowed," you continued, laying your hands now flat on the marble surface.
"Meaning there's still a chance that we will still end up together. Meant to be if you ask me," Tom concluded, lifting up a hand.
You moved forward to give him a high-five, missing his hand by a lot which made you let out a loud, hearty laugh, Tom following suit with laughs of his own.
"What are you two on?" Harrison said with a crinkle of his nose.
"Alcohol," you and Tom answered at the same time. Both of your mouths turned into the shape of O's as you looked at each other properly delighted.
"Jinx!" both of you exclaimed in unison. "Jinx again!"
"Our mental synchronization; can have but one explanation," you and Tom sang in harmony, never breaking your gaze as you both smiled proudly.
"You—"
"And I—"
"Were—"
"Just—"
"Meant to be!" You two ended with fits of laughter, raising your hands to go for another high five. You missed Tom's hand again which only made you wheeze, tears of joy brimming in yours and his eyes as you tried for the second time, both of you cheering loudly when it finally landed.
"Cringe, really made for each other," Harry gagged teasingly with a grimace to match.
And then Harrison intervened. "How about fuck, marry, kill, Tom Hiddleston, Tom Felton and," he paused, grin turning wider like a Cheshire cat as he wiggled his eyebrows at you. "Tom Holland?"
"That's not part of the game," you protested with a pout.
"Answer the question, darling," Tom encouraged, looking at you expectantly.
"I'm taking a shot," you muttered, going for your drink but before you could even do so, Tom had already taken it far away from your reach. "Hey!" you whined.
Tom chuckled softly as he shook his head no. "You said it's not part of the game so no, you have to answer," he said. "And that's enough alcohol for you, my love," he cooed, tilting his head at you knowingly with a sweet smile. If Tom will let you continue with the drinking then you'll surely be complaining nonstop about the throbbing headache you'll get and the constant nausea after all this.
You sat back on your chair with your bottom lip jutted out, arms crossed over your chest to match, much like a child as you started to think about your answer. Although the process took way longer than you'd expect it to be and the boys were quick to notice.
"Uh oh, she's having a hard time," Harry teased when a few long seconds has gone by and you still haven't given an answer.
"I don't know how I feel about the hesitation here," Tom admitted as he looked at you curiously, brows furrowing with a chuckle when you were still deep in thought after a few seconds more.
"She genuinely is having a hard time," Tuwaine laughed.
"This is so unfair," you grumbled dejectedly as you looked at your man with a sweet, adorable pout, silently asking for help.
"What'd you do with me first to make things easier," Tom offered with a chuckle.
As if there was a hidden message to his words—there wasn't—your face suddenly lit up, slapping your palms on the table excitedly as you sat straighter. "You know what, kill the other two and I'll fuck and marry you," you declared heartily, eyes locked securely with Tom's with the proudest grin playing on your lips.
Tom's heart did somersaults at the mere fact of you wanting to marry him, grin wide and bright as he stared into your orbs, utmost love glowing in yours that was wholesomely mirrored by his brown ones.
It wasn't long until Tom felt his blood rush down though, heat dancing on his skin as his brain got occupied with the thought of you fucking him too. Certain memories flooded his mind, one after the other that it was getting harder for him to stay calm in his seat.
You are honestly giving him a whiplash with how you make him feel one emotion to another in a span of seconds, though Tom wasn't at all complaining.
"That's not how the game works!" Harrison exclaimed.
"I'm pretty happy with that answer," Tom shrugged with a wide, cocky grin, eyes never leaving yours as he raised a brow at you suggestively. You held his gaze with a tilt of your head, bottom lip caught between your teeth to try and stop your smile from growing.
The interaction didn't go unnoticed by Harry though. "Okay, stop eye-fucking each other you horny teenagers," the younger brother complained.
Tom laughed at that, shifting in his seat as he turned towards the camera. "On that note, we're ending the video there. This has been Tom Holland," he paused, giving you a nod as a cue.
"And Mrs. Holland," you blurted at the camera with a smile, eyes widening once you realised the choice of words you've just used. "Oh wait! No! Fuc—I don't mean no as in 'no,' I meant not yet," you fumbled. "We're not even engaged yet! Don't start with the headlines you." You pointed at the camera in warning.
He shook his head with a chuckle, red tinting his cheeks but pure admiration glowed in his eyes. "You own my fucking heart, you know that? You make me melt all the damn time," Tom gushed through gritted teeth, and it was taking a whole lot of his self-control to not jump over the table and just kiss you senseless. You felt your heart grow at his words but you could only bury your face in your hands with a groan of pure embarrassment. "She's drunk, my apologies," Tom added with a laugh as he turned towards the camera.
"Tipsy, there's a difference," you corrected as you shot him a glare.
Tom chuckled, smiling at you widely before turning back to the lens. "Anyway, see you on the next one and peace!" he finished with the sign and then a salute, Harry throwing out an upturned thumb to signal cut.
Once he saw that the camera was off, Tom was out of his seat in record speed, moving over to your now standing form as he swiftly wrapped both his arms around your waist and crashed his lips onto yours with a low groan. His arms tightened around you as he relished the feeling of finally having you so close.
You giggled against the kiss, resting your arms over his shoulders as you leaned back on the table to keep your balance, your bum half-rested on the marble while your foot stayed steady on the floor, legs apart so that Tom can situate himself between them easily.
"So, fuck and marry me huh?" Tom hummed deeply against your mouth, playfully nibbling at your bottom lip before pulling away so he can see your gorgeous face fully.
"Out of all the things I've said, that's what stuck with you?" you giggled with a shake of your head.
"I mean, you fucking me will never fail to sound very hot, reminds me of the few times you did." Tom wriggled his brows at you suggestively, hands giving your waist as teasing squeeze. "Though I don't know which one's hotter, that or you marrying me," he said with the proudest smirk.
"Will you two take this somewhere else?" Harry complained, always the last one to be left in the room given that he's mostly in-charge with taking care of the camera. Harrison and Tuwaine were already gone, continuing whatever they had to do that day.
"Don't think that would make a difference though," Tom chuckled smugly, looking back at you with a knowing grin.
"Which reminds me how we need to sound proof the fucking walls you nasty rabbits."
"I was kidding. We're not that loud fuck off," Tom remarked, rolling his eyes at his brother.
And to prove how wrong Tom's point was, Harrison suddenly started moaning so piercingly right in the next room, his voice a bit muffled but you can still hear him, loud and obnoxious.
"Fuck! Love! Fuck yes! Just like that, darling! Shit baby I'm gonna—"
"Fuck off Harrison you fucking twat!" Tom yelled at the top of his lungs, the blonde lad's boisterous and annoying laugh echoing soon after.
Tom turned crimson red as the embarrassment coated him from head to toe, head dropping for him to hide his face on the crook of your neck with a groan. You let out a soft giggle, hand landing on the back of his head as you ran your fingers through his hair comfortingly. Your face was warm as you were embarrassed just the same, although there was more of a sense of pride on your behalf because yes, Tom does get a bit loud sometimes, all courtesy to you.
It wasn't always of course, both of you aren't evil enough to torture the lads that much. Aside from the fact that Tom is rarely even home—meaning you don't do the deed that much in this house—the two of you had made a pact to make sure that you're completely alone before properly going at it. Admittedly, it does get a bit hard to keep the noise down sometimes, so the boys have to endure it every now and then. They do get back at you guys soon after as they are quick to be little shits with the teasing and dirty jokes, much like now.
"Maybe we do need to soundproof our walls," you teased once your man pulled away to look at you with a soft sigh, hands running up and down your waist sweetly.
"Or we could finally look for our own place to move in?" Tom proposed with a charming smile, your heart melting at the sight and skipping a beat at his words.
Granted, you've been with Tom for a fair three and a half years already, but neither of you had gone to take that step of actually living fully on your own where it's just no one but him and you in your own home. You've been living in this house for roughly the same time—maybe a year or two less—and you've got no problem living with the lads, you consider them as your brothers now. But you won't deny that having a place exclusively for you and Tom only would be pure bliss.
Of course you've talked about getting your own place and neither of you were opposed to it. It all just came down to Tom being constantly busy and barely even home. You'd rather live with the boys for the mean time than sulk all alone in a house while slowly being buried in the emotions of missing your boyfriend.
Tom also wanted to be there for the most of it—choosing and buying furniture, decorating a thing or two, moving, the likes—but with his schedule, it was hard to find the perfect time.
But now he's promised you that he'd slow down for a bit.
He genuinely hasn't done anything but work nonstop. It was just projects upon projects with only so little breaks in between, a month if he's lucky. Tom is one hardworking man, that's one of the many things you love about him, but he sometimes doesn't realize when he's pushing himself too far.
That's when you step in.
You'd encouraged him to take a breather, even if it's just for half a year or so but you never did pester him about it constantly as you weren't one to take him away from doing what he loves. Unless it gets way out of hand, then that's when you'll be putting your foot down. You know he'll do it whenever he's ready to slow down and now with most of his projects wrapped, he's finally decided that it was the right time to take that much needed break.
"I love the sound of that," you giggled, treading your fingers through his hair before tracing it down his chiseled jaw. "Not as much as I love the sound of you moaning though," you hummed teasingly.
"Well then, let's find our own place so you can hear me moan all for you and as loud as you want, darling," Tom purred lowly, his bottom lip caught between his teeth as his darkened orbs bored into yours, his hands sliding down to rest on the swell of your bum. He fondled the flesh hotly as he started to lean closer to capture your lips. But before Tom could even do so a loud voice made you both jump away from each other.
"For fuck's sake guys! I'm still fucking here!" Harry yelled, throwing both his hands in the air in downright annoyance and disgust as he screwed his eyes shut. "Go to your fucking room for the love of my sanity!"
You didn't even get a chance to apologise to the young lad as Tom swiftly grabbed your hand and rushed to your shared bedroom.
Nothing happened though apart from a couple minutes of making out, Tom deciding not to take it further given that you were all tipsy and intoxicated. Him deciding since you were persistent on saying you were fine even though you were giggling nonstop, easily tickled no matter how feather-like his kisses were. Not to mention how you could barely even keep your eyes open. So, both of you ended up taking a warm bath and then a nap right after that, instead.
Although the minute you sobered up, Tom made sure you weren't at all quiet this time around. It was due to the pent up tension that's been building since that somewhat steamy Q&A. And maybe, just maybe to get back at the boys a teeny bit for being little shits with both the teasing jokes and the dirty questions.
The two of you went out of your bedroom only at dinner time, stepping foot in the dining area where Harry, Tuwaine and Harrison were all situated. You felt the embarrassment coat every inch of your body when you took sight of the boys, more specifically, their expressions. Tom, on the other hand, had the cockiest smirk playing on his lips as he held his head high, tauntingly chuckling at his mates.
The three lads were sitting around the table with nothing but grimaces and downright disgust on their faces as they all grumbled in unison,
"Rabbits."
-:-:-:-:-
like, reblog & leave a comment if you enjoyed! tell me your thoughts! <3
♛ Overall/Everything Taglist: @theunwantedomega​ @badreputatiom​ @fallinfortom​ @disneysamara​ @avengersficwriter​ @musicalkeys​ @apatheticanvas67482​ @camimndess​ @tom-hlover​ @jjandreidsgirl​ @blossomparkers​ @thenoddingbunny-blog​ @sarcasticallywitty15​ @call-me-baby-gir1​ @miraclesoflove​ ♛ Tom H. Taglist: @hollandfanficlove​​ @averyfosterthoughts​​ @2018shawn​​ @darlingspidey​​ @namoreno​​ @spacebitch2 @hollanddolanfangirl​​ @keepingupwiththehollands​​ @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh​​ @unbelievableholland​​ @kittenruby​​ @sunkisseddreamer​​ @worldoftom​​ @quaksonhehe​​ @big-galaxy-chaos​​ @clara-licht​​ @dummiesshort​​ @imanativeofswlondondahling​​ @sonofabitchstyles​​ @perspectiveparker​​ @geminiparkers​​ @parker-hollandx​​ @arivera-30​ @rebekkah4766​ @particularnarry​ @iwannabekilledtwice​ @prettyintopeerpressure​ @fancyxholland​ @givebuckyhisplumsnow​ @asoftie4bucky​ @dandelionxgal​ @peterspideysstuff​ @zspideyy​​
1K notes · View notes
kylie-writes-stuff · 3 years
Text
“wife”
pairing: corpse husband x reader (female)
words: 1,714
requested?: no (send some in tho pls :) )
plot/summary: felix invites his friend, y/n, to play among us when they need an extra player. her and corpse get along well
authors note: so this isnt that good and i know a lot of corpse fics use a similar plot. i just wanted to try to write for corpse. hopefully things i write for him in the future are better. let me know what you think tho! also i really wanted reader to be best friends with karl bc i love him sm. uh every swiggly line is like a small time skip. this was written late at night btw and i didnt take much time to go over it
⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒
You sat up from laying down when you heard your phone ring. You looked at the caller ID.
Felix.
"What's up Felix?" You ask with a small yawn.
"Aww, how sweet," You hear in the background.
You giggle and ask, "Is that Sean? Hi Sean!"
"Yeah, we're playing Among Us and need an extra player. You down?" Felix explained.
"Sure, just give me a few minutes. See you soon, whore"
"Bitc-" You hang up before he can finish.
You got up and turned off your TV, going to get ready. 
⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒
You quickly tweet out that you're going live and say something on your insta story as well. You start your stream and slowly watch people flood in.
"Hey everyone! How are you guys doing?" You wave and smile, reading the chat.
"Everyone doing good, awesome! And i'm sorry to anyone having a bad day. I hope i can brighten it a bit!"
"Okay, sorry i didn't give you a further notice. I didn't even know i was gonna stream. Felix invited me to play Among Us so... here we are!"
You quickly join the discord and pull up the game, putting a cover over where the code goes.
"Hello?" You ask as you join the call. A chorus of greetings came your way.
"(Y/n)?"
"Karl!" You smile brightly.
Karl Jacobs was a good friend of yours. You would play on the Dream SMP sometimes. When you would, it would mostly be you being stupid with Karl and Alex, also known as Quackity. You were even a well know citizen of El Rapids.
"LET'S GOOOOO!" He yelled, making you laugh.
"Hey (Y/n), do you know everyone here?" Sean asks you.
"Um," You quickly scan through the names, "no, i don't think so."
You recognized names but you only personally knew Felix, Sean, Karl, and Ethan.
"Oh my god! Your voice is so cute!" Pokimane exclaims.
You giggle softly, "Thank you Poki!"
You're voice wasn't high pitched or anything like that, you just always spoke very softly and calmly. You were also a bit quiet.
Felix introduces you to those that you didn't know.
"There's one more person we're waiting for," He says.
While everyone waits, you and Karl run around each other's little characters and make jokes between yourselves. You mute yourself to read donations every once in a while.
You hear the discord chime, signaling that someone joined the call.
"WAIT CORPSE! DON'T SPEAK YET!" Felix yelled. "We have a new player. This is my friend (Y/n), say hi to her"
"Hello (Y/n)," Corpse said. You were taken aback by how deep his voice was but you didn't show it.
"Hi Corpse! Nice to meet you!" You said happily.
"Okay, how is she not freaking out?" Bretman said, making everyone laugh.
"Uh, (Y/n), do you mind letting me have black? It's cool if not.." Corpse asked gently.
"O-oh sure, no problem." You were usually black with the pink flamingo hat, but you ran over to the little computer and changed your color.
"Simp," Ethan mumbled, knowing you never switch from black.
"Thank you," He said, then the game started.
The word “Imposter” appeared on your screen in red, yours and Corpse's characters underneath.
As the game started, you thought no one could hear you so you spoke to your chat. "His voice was so deep, what the fuck? Holy shit that was hot, i'm gonna-"
"(Y/n)," Rae laughed, "You know we're playing proximity chat, right."
You blushed as you realized and said "Ha, anyways..." and ran to start faking tasks.
You ended up in electrical with Karl. "(Y/n)! My good friend, my buddy, you would never kill me right? Haha..." He said.
"Of course not, Karl! My good friend, my buddy. Why, I'm not even imposter," I said as i quickly dipped into the vent and back out, making him laugh.
I decided to show him because I knew Karl wouldn't say anything, and it's funny.
"Oh that's good then. Are you sure you're not imposter?"
"Mhm, pretty sure," You said, going back in. As you came out, Sykkuno walked in and froze.
"Uh, (Y/n)?"
"Fuck... Karl run! Go!" You said, Karl starting to leave. You walked closer and quickly killed Sykkuno then vented to security.
"That was close..." You told your chat.
You saw Corpse as you made your way around the map and walked into navigation.
"Hey, Corpse, how ya doing?"
"Ah you know, good. Just being crewmate and all."
You stifled a laugh, "Oh yeah I feel that, buddy."
"Yeah because there's no way that i'm imposter. No way i could be faking tasks and there's no possible way you could be the other imposter" He said quickly.
"For sure. Hypothetically speaking, though, if you were imposter, how many people would you have killed by now?"
"I would say probably around two."
"Interesting," You said right before a body was reported. It was Sykkuno's. Felix and Rae were also dead.
"WHAT!" Corpse yelled.
"Where was the body at?" Sean laughed.
"Uh I found it in electrical," Bretman said.
"I'm pretty sure Karl was in there earlier."
You calmly said, "It's not Karl, I was with him for most of the round."
"How do we know the two of you aren't imposters?" Sean asked.
"I was alone with him, he would have taken the chance to kill me."
"No, he's your best friend."
"He's also ruthless,"
"TRUE! SO TRUE!" Karl yelled.
"So skip?" Corpse asked.
Everyone agreed and the voting was skipped.
The next round, I spent with Ethan. He was pretending to be mad at me because Sean said Karl was my best friend.
"What happened to Blue Boi Buddies, huh?!" He exclaimed.
"Neither of our hair is even blue anymore!" You argued back.
You were in reactor with him when Corpse and Poki walked in. He hit the lights and you took it as a sign to double kill. He killed Poki, you killed Ethan, and the two of you made your way to electrical to help fix lights.
You and Corpse went the opposite direction of reactor after the lights were fixed, Karl going with you.
Poki's body was reported. That double kill only left you, Corpse, Sean, Karl and Bretman. You only needed two more kills.
"I still think it's Karl and (Y/n)," Sean said quickly.
"I was with (Y/n) the whole time," Corpse said, "In fact, I think it's you."
"That does make sense. Why so quick to accuse others, Sean?" You ask.
"It's not me!" He yelled.
"I actually agree with Corpse and (Y/n)," Bretman said.
"I was with you!"
We all voted for Sean, him voting for Karl. Sean was ejected.
When you load into spawn, you wait for the kill cool down and kill Bretman, saving Karl.
"Victory" appeared on your screen.
"God damn it!" Sean yelled.
"Good job, (Y/n)," Corpse said lowly.
You smiled, a slight blush on your cheeks, "You too Corpse."
"Their voices go together and they're a fuckin dream team? What have i done...," Felix sighed.
⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒
A few more games went by. Most of them you and Corpse spent together, whether you were both crewmates or if one of you was imposter.
You really enjoyed his company and you actually got along with him pretty well.
⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒
"(Y/n), before we get serious, I have one question to ask you." Corpse said as both of your characters stopped.
"What's that?" You giggled.
"Do you know Bingus?"
"Bingus? As in, our lord and savior, Bingus?"
You could hear the smile in his voice, "It's settled, you're my wife now."
This made both of you laugh and your chat go crazy.
⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒
Eventually, people had to start leaving. You said your goodbyes to everyone and left the discord call and the game.
You set stream to where it was just your face cam.
"Guys, what should we do now?"
You saw some people asking what time it was for you.
"It's 3 AM right now... I’m not tired though.” You had been streaming for a few hours; You never even noticed how late it got.
People in chat were yelling at you to go to sleep, making you chuckle.
“How about we do a quick QnA, then at 3:30 I go to bed. Deal?”
You watched as the chat filled with questions. They obviously seemed to like the idea.
“‘Who is your best friend? Karl or Ethan?’ Neither, Alex Quackity. Next question.” You answered quickly.
You laughed, “I’d like to clarify that that’s a joke, i love all my friends equally.”
You answered more questions. Some were from new viewers asking basic questions, some were about future streams and videos. 
“‘How do you feel about people shipping you and Corpse?’“ People are already shipping us?” You laughed, “I’ve said before that I’m okay with shipping, as long as the other person is too. I think it’s funny.”
You continued to read chat. “Wait, we’re trending?”
You checked Twitter and “#(your and corpse’s ship name)” was trending in the US.
You laughed as you scrolled through the tag, “Oh this is so funny.”
“Fanart already?! You guys are so talented!”
You read chat, looking for more questions. You saw people telling you that it’s 3:30.
“Okay fine, a deal’s a deal. I hope you all have, or had, a great day and I’ll see you guys later. Depending on what time it is for you, you should also get some sleep. Stay hydrated, love you!” You ended stream.
⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒
You scrolled through Twitter as you laid in bed, liking fanart and dumb memes. Also replying to a few of your friends’ tweets.
karl :) @/KarlJacobs_
@/(your username) what the honk ?
*clip of you saying Quackity was your best friend*           
You liked the tweet and replied, “karl no,,, look away,,,”
You continued scrolling, feeling your eyes get droopy. Your eyes fell closed but quickly opened when your phone vibrated. It was a DM. 
From Corpse.
You two had followed each other earlier.
Corpse: hey (y/n), just wanted to say you’re really cool and i’d love to play again with you soon 
You smiled, a light blush spreading across your cheeks, and replied.
You: i’d love to, corpse
Corpse: ok, see you soon ‘wife’
You: back at ya, ‘husband”
Corpse: :)
You: :)
894 notes · View notes
illfoandillfie · 3 years
Text
Impersonal
As promised, here’s the smutty followup to yesterday’s blurb! This is the fifth post of seven in my Platonically themed event. Again, it’s not really been edited because it’s late and I’m very tired but alas, thats how it goes. 
Words: 2,278
Warning: some vague dom/sub dynamic stuff with a more dom Ben, spanking, it’s P in V sex but theres a lot of talk about butts. Also they’re still dorks. 
It had been a nice day. You and Ben had gone out with a few friends, just a little picnic in the park to catch up with everyone. If you’d been at all worried about publicly being together on a no romo day, then it was for nothing. As much as everyone there considered you and Ben to be an item, it mostly went ignored, aside from a couple of questions about how you’d gone living together so far. But having such a big lunch, everyone having brought something to share, neither of you were especially hungry at dinner time. Ben whipped up a pot of butted noodles for you to pick at as you watched TV but it was soon set aside as you shifted to lean against the arm rest with your legs stretched out to lay over Ben’s thighs. Each of you were engrossed in your phones more than the quiz show he’d flicked on, occasionally sharing something you saw or read.  
You had opened tumblr and were scrolling through your dash, pausing to read longer bits here and there but mostly just liking images and reblogging memes. Until you hit a patch of not safe for work content. One of the porn blogs you’d long since forgotten you’d followed had hit a rare patch of activity, every second post one of theirs. Those posts you paid a little more attention to, especially when videos and explicit images were involved since you knew they were likely to be taken down soon and you didn’t want to miss out on seeing something hot. Unfortunately your headphones were in another room so you weren’t game to turn the sound on for any of the videos but the visuals and erotic comments below were enough to make you feel as if the room as heated up. You could feel yourself getting wetter at each new post but couldn’t seem to stop looking at them.  
A particularly good video of a sloppy blowjob made you clench your thighs together, your foot rubbing against Ben’s thigh as a result. His palm came to rest on the top of your foot, rubbing it soothingly, though his attention was still elsewhere. In fact, his gaze didn’t shift until a little later when you were looking at a very hot gifset of a woman on all fours, crying as she was pounded from behind. He cleared his throat. You jolted a little at the sound and tried not to look too guilty as you met his eye.   “You okay?” “Mmhmm,” His eyes travelled over you from the lip between your teeth to your tightly pressed thighs and your fingers wrapped firmly around the phone.   “I don’t mean to interrupt,” he said, clearly meaning to do exactly that, “but ummmm, are you watching porn right now?” “No,” you answered too quickly. “Hey, you don’t have to hide it if you are, go nuts. I’m just a little curious about what’s turned you on so much you’re practically panting. And can I help?” “I’m not watching anything. It’s just some gifs I saw.” “Well I think QPR law states you have to show me or you’d be a big meanie.” You chuckled and handed the phone to Ben, a little curious about how he’d react.   Ben watched the gifs through a couple of times before nodding, “Yeah, that’s uhhh, that’s pretty hot,” he rubbed your foot again as he kept watching the looped footage. “Are you turned on?” “Yeah, a bit,” “Hmmm, same.” “Should we-” “Do you wanna-” You spoke at the same time and then both laughed a little as you simultaneously agreed, “Yeah.” Immediately you swung your legs around intending to walk towards the bedroom and Ben followed for about two steps before he stopped suddenly, “Wait. This is a no romo day, right? Do you still feel anti-romance?” “Yes and yeah I think so. Why?” Ben shrugged, “I don’t think we’ve ever had sex on a no romo day so...how does it work?” “Oh, good point. Well.” you wanted to keep it brief, already worked up and wanting to move to the fun part, “I think it’s probably best if we keep it on kind of the rougher side, a little impersonal even. Could you maybe hit it from behind? I’m not really sure eye contact and all that stuff would be as fun for me right now.” “No need to ask twice. My hot partner wants me to look at her gorgeous arse while I fuck her? Yeah definitely into that.” “Jesus I’d forgotten you’re an arse man.” It was true too. As much as Ben might prefer ass to tits he also enjoyed the visual stimulation of watching you – seeing the pleasure on your face, watching your body react to his. So, while doggy style was a regular position for you, variations of missionary and cowgirl were probably a little more frequent. Which was wonderful, except not what you needed right then. Ben responded by poking his tongue out you but he seemed quite as eager to move things along, “So rough doggy then? Can I spank you?” “You’d be into that?” He shrugged, “I know we haven’t really done anything kinky yet but yeah, I enjoy spanking. I mean...watching an arse jiggle after it’s hit is incredibly hot.” You giggled, “spanking is very okay then. You could be a little mean too if you wanted, maybe calling me a degrading name to get at that impersonal thing. Slut maybe.” He hummed uncertainly, “I can try it if you really want but I gotta admit I’m not as into degrading stuff as I am spanking.” “It’s fine if you don’t, whatever works. Honestly, I’m already super horny so just do whatever you’re comfortable with and don’t get too gentle or loving with it, and I’ll be happy.” “I can definitely do rough for you. For instance,” You gasped as Ben grasped your hips and turned you around, positioning you in front of the arm of the couch before he pushed you to bend over it. It was a surprise considering Ben’s typical nature. He had his controlling or domineering moments but generally seemed happiest when he was showering you in affection or letting you take charge. Adding to the surprise was the way he tugged your pants down to your knees and began to touch you through your underwear. It made you squirm, trying to find a little more friction, but he only gave you a quick spank. Not overly hard but it didn’t have to be to make you feel tingly. Just knowing Ben was capable of an action like that was hot enough. All the same he pulled your knickers down too and ran his fingers through your folds.   “Wow, okay. You meant it when you said you were horny. Pretty wet already.” “No shit Sherlock. You know I don’t need lines like that that get you interested in fucking me.” He gave you another slap for your insolence.   “Better get you stretched out then, hadn’t we?” You felt two of Ben’s fingers rest against your entrance and expected to feel them sink into you too. But it didn’t happen.   “What’s the hold up, Tiger? Ow,” the spank had been a little harder than the last.   “If you want them so bad, do it yourself.” Your breath caught as you realised what he meant and you shifted your hips back, levering yourself against the arm of the couch, until you felt his fingers penetrate you.   “That’s it Kitten. You’re too horny to wait, aren’t you? God you’ve got such a pretty arse. Giving me the best view right now. Your needy cunt soaking my fingers while your arse,” he hit you again, “jiggles. It’s making me so hard.” You whined, unable to find a better response, and rocked back against his fingers, slowly fucking yourself on them.   He let you go on like that for a little while, happy to listen to your hitched breaths and needy sighs as you got a little of what you needed. But then he pulled his fingers from you. You let out a disappointed whimper, “Ben, c’mon,” “I’m so hard from watching you be so desperate. Just gotta get my pants off. But you can play with yourself for me, can’t you?” You nodded and shifted so you could drop your fingers to your pussy. Ben gave your arse another slap, “Not what I meant Kitten. Play with your arse.” Startled by the low growl in his voice you quickly complied, leaning on the couch as your brought both hands up to grab your arse cheeks, squeezing them and pulling them apart to better show off your holes.” “That’s very good, Kitten. Spank yourself.” It wasn’t the same as when Ben spanked you since you knew what was coming and the position didn’t allow you to get as much force into your hits as he could. But it was definitely arousing and it definitely seemed to work for Ben. You’d barely registered the sound of his pants dropping before he was sliding into your wet and waiting cunt.   “I can take it from here,” Ben’s hands replaced yours, groping your arse as you dropped your arms back to the couch, though you felt it was useless to try and prop yourself up on them. It would only be a matter of time before you collapsed entirely.  
At first he kept the pace slower, letting you adjust to him, though each thrust was forceful, just as you’d asked it to be. But gradually Ben sped up, hands still playing with your cheeks, sometimes grabbing and sometimes spanking them. He tried to say more about how hot it was to take you like that but his own breath was escaping him as the words seemed to be. So he let his body talk for him as he pounded your cunt and dug his fingers into your flesh.   And then he pulled out.   You were on the verge of asking him who the fuck he thought he was when he said, “one second. Just want to try something.” and then, remembering he was meant to be acting mean, added, “And you just want me to keep fucking you, so you’re not going to complain.” In a disgruntled daze you let Ben help you up onto the back of the couch so that one leg was bent to lean against the arm he’d just had you bent over and the other dangled towards the floor. It took a little more adjustment before Ben was happy. First pulling you back towards him and the corner of the couch, and then pressing you to lean forward so your hips were raised and he could better access your pussy. You had to grab onto the back of the couch for support, digging your fingertips into the leather as Ben resumed fucking you.   The angle had changed a little and the position was slightly more awkward to maintain but it was worth it for the way your clit rubbed against the smooth leather, leaving a trail of wetness behind. Each thrust rocked your hips in such a way that you quickly found yourself getting close to release.
That, however, seemed to be Ben’s plan as he began telling you how good you were going to make him feel when he made you cum. “I know you’re close Kitten. So just cum. I want to feel your cunt on me when you do.” He lay another few spanks to your arse cheeks and that tipped you over into your orgasm.   But Ben didn’t stop.   “I th-think you can do bett-er than that,” he grit out as you clenched around him and he seemed to thrust twice as hard as he had before, “You were so,”   You grunted as he plowed into you. “So desperate before. So you can cum better than that. Right kitten?” You nodded and gasped out a, “Yes” as your arms shook with how hard Ben was fucking you.   But he didn’t relent. He kept going until he felt you tighten again and heard you moan, nearly sobbing as relief flooded your system.   That seemed to be enough for Ben and he let himself go too, holding your hip tightly as he pressed deep into you.  
Ben leaned his forehead against your back as he tried to regain his regular breathing rate and gave you a quick kiss there before he righted himself and helped you to dismount the couch. The evidence of your orgasms was still smeared across the leather but neither of you paid it any attention.   “Sorry I never called you a slut or anything,” Ben said with a slightly self-conscious chuckle, avoiding your eye as he hitched his pants back into place. “I just like Kitten better.” “Don’t be,” you said mirroring his actions to looking at him, “Kitten worked perfectly. Also, that was really good. Maybe you could be rough and mean more often?” “The double orgasm was a pretty good indication that it worked for you,” “Of shut up, I was being serious. It was really hot.” “Yes but I like teasing you, remember,” “Prick.” “That hurts,” he said with a fake gasp and a hand against his chest, “Keep talking like that and I’ll have to spank you again,” “Ha ha, very funny. Tease me all you want but we both you enjoyed it as much as I did.” “Maybe I did.” he conceded, “but I wasn’t going to hate it when I was watching your arse.” “Alright, you perv. Was there any leftover noodles? Bit peckish now.” “Yeah, in the fridge. Grab me some too would you?”
58 notes · View notes
slasherbastard · 3 years
Note
How would the slashers act if there s/o had a musical talent? Like amazing singing or plays an instrument? Just curious. Love your blog
thank you so much! You have no idea how excited I’ve been to post this, also I didn’t know what slashers to do so I threw together some random ones who I haven’t written for much (and Brahms, you can’t forget Brahms)
Tumblr media
(gif credit: macmillanestate)
Poly!Billy and Stu
You're in a band as the electric guitarist/lead vocalist, probably a pop punk band
Billy and Stu always come to your shows
Even if they have murder plans, they will 100% show up to support their favourite person and their band afterwards (but mostly you)
Supportive boyfriends™
Back when you were practicing with your band in your parent's garage, Billy and Stu were the walking definition of happy heckling
It was either you kick them out of the garage or practice at someone else's place
Long story short, the drummer's house is pretty cool
They get to hear your band's songs early, no exceptions
They will want to help you with song writing
Stu: "Okay okay what about you just start screaming at this part?"
Billy: "Ooh wait, you should sing this part then go into the chorus"
Stu: "Will I be credited on the album as a co-songwriter?"
"Yeah, definitely Stu."
When your band goes on tour they will miss you like crazy, Stu will cry and beg you not to go
One of them - if not both - have probably tried hiding in your suitcases
If you’re performing at a show that isn’t too far, there’s a chance that Billy and Stu will show up and surprise you
Your band either hates or loves them
You may or may not have had to replace one of the ruder members after their mysterious disappearance, your boyfriends definitely didn’t have anything to do with it
Okay he was getting on your nerves and Billy caught him flirting with you- oh, you guys weren’t flirting? You were just showing him your new guitar? Oof
They’ve definitely been kicked out of multiple venues for being happy hecklers
"That's my Y/N! Wooh!"
"We love you, babe!"
Tumblr media
(gif credit: boodalinski-gifs)
Brahms Heelshire
Before taking the job as a babysitter, you were a pianist
When Mrs. Heelshire first showed you the “classroom” you were so happy to see that they owned a piano
You wanted to ask if you could play it but you did arrive later than you’d expected so you’s expected
So you waited until your first day with Brahms
Brahms didn’t expect his nanny to know how to play the piano so when you sat down and started playing one of your favourite pieces, he was hooked
The human Brahms started leaving you notes and sheets of music that he wanted you to learn, bonus points if you already knew them
It confused you, but you weren’t complaining. You love playing piano and it was one way to stop you from dying of boredom
When you’re doing chores you gently sing along to whatever song is playing on your phone
You found out about the real Brahms in the middle of the night when you heard someone playing a lullaby on the piano 
You followed the music and saw him sitting there, lost in the music
When Brahms saw you he expected you to run, but instead you sat next to him and watched him play
But knowing Brahms, he’d probably stop and make you play a piece for him
This happens everytime you catch him playing
So you’ve started pretending not to hear it, when you’re actually standing just outside the room
Brahms caught you once, you sing a lot louder than you think you do
Tumblr media
(gif credit: vork---m)
Bubba Sawyer
Texas in the mid 1970s? You’re probably an acoustic guitarist who knows a few country songs
But your musical expertise isn’t shortened to just country songs, you also know how to play some blues and a few older songs from the 30s-50s (think Diamond City Radio from Fallout 4?)
When Bubba found out you could play the guitar he begged you to play him something
You probably played him Johnny Cash, maybe Betty Hutton
Sometimes you put on concerts for him, his cousins, and sometimes his grandpa
Hell, sometimes Drayton will even listen - he won’t admit that he likes hearing you play but you’ve caught him singing and dancing along to you playing the guitar more times than either of you would like to admit
When Bubba isn’t busy dealing with victims he’ll definitely sit with you and watch you practice
If a song comes on the radio that he knows that you can play, he’ll ask you to play it on your guitar
When you sing he also tries to sing - well, babbles but it’s still adorable
Bubba would encourage you to perform in public at a nearby bar - although he can’t come and see you for obvious reasons
Or he’ll beg you to record yourself playing and send it to a radio station
If you did and they decided to play it, Bubba would be more excited than you
He’d babble so much, roughly translating to something along the lines of-
"I'm so proud of you! My baby Y/N is famous!"
Would Bubba cry? Yes
Bubba’s always gonna be your biggest fan, no matter if you get famous or only play for him and his family in the living room
If he could, he’d brag about you to everyone
Sometimes when he’s dealing with victims he’ll babble to them as if he’s trying to tell them that his Y/N is one of the most talented humans he’d ever me
"They're amazing - stop screaming i'm trying to tell you about the love of my life - sigh, okay fine *chainsaw noises*
Tumblr media
(gif credit: theghostbeaters)
Amanda Young
Amanda LOVES hearing you sing
She idolises you, although she’s a tiny bit jealous about your voice
It makes her wonder how she was so lucky to score someone like you
If you write a song about her, she will be obsessed
She’ll hum it while she’s setting up the next games and while preparing the next victims
When she first introduces you to John, he’ll tell you that Amanda is beyond obsessed with you
You won’t see it, but she’ll be making faces and hand gestures at John trying to shut him up and stop embarrassing her
"This one does not shut up about you"
"Did you write her a song? She sings it constantly!"
"I swear I should invent a trap to shut her up"
It’s like a father-daughter relationship between those two, it’s amusing
Sometimes you try to get Amanda to sing with you as well
Amanda’s more of a listener than a singer - unless she’s singing one of your songs
But she tries to sing with you as it makes you happy
She mostly enjoys your voice, though, especially when she’s not feeling the best mentally, it calms her
Tumblr media
(gif credit: stabhappyslashers)
Vincent Sinclair
Vincent didn’t know you could sing until he caught you singing along to one his brother’s CDs, so you know it’s gonna be either heavy, edgy, or both
Spoiler alert: it was a Deftones album
You were upstairs doing who knows what when he heard loud music, and he doesn’t like being disturbed especially when he’s working
He came upstairs to tell you to turn your music down but was stunned when he heard you singing those harsh vocals almost entirely at the same level as the vocalist
When you realised Vincent was watching you you nearly passed out from shock
He’s really quiet
You’d quickly pause your music and apologise
"Oh- Uh sorry Vincent. I didn't see you there"
"Were you working? Shit, you were working. I am so sorry"
Although you were embarrassed, Vincent thought it was cute
He’d sign at you not to be embarrassed and he’d leave you to finish whatever you were previously doing
He listens to you sing more often, he’s a sucker for your voice
If you’re in the studio with him and you start softly humming he won’t stop you
Although it might distract him and cause him to take too much wax off of one of his works (sorry Vincent)
Bonus: (aka, sort of shitposts)
Poly!Billy and Stu - Billy and Stu were never huge fans of Alice Cooper but after you forced them to watch Monster Dog, they have not shut up about Identity Crisises
Brahms Heelshire - As much as Brahms loves you and your musical talent, he really wants you to stop playing “meme songs” on the piano. He can’t stand whatever a “wii shop theme” is
Bubba Sawyer - three words. Friends Without Faces
Amanda Young - Amanda’s guilty pleasure? Musicals - Just don’t mention Repo! The Genetic Opera, though
Vincent Sinclair - He’ll record you singing - with your permission, of course - for an exhibition in the House of Wax
144 notes · View notes
astranva · 4 years
Text
Power BFFs.
// masterlist //
Word Count: 2.1k
Category: Fluff best friend!harry, best friend!reader
Warning: None!
Summary: In which Harry’s best friend is a hijabi blogger and they’re everyone’s bffs’ goals.
Bonus: Instagram posts!
..
Tumblr media
For as long as you lived, you have always been into fashion. You were the kid who chose to wear pink with orange long before Taylor Swift’s dress was the new cool, always one whom family went to for advice when it came to putting outfits together.
Hell, if someone could pay you for the times your mom was on the phone with your aunt or a friend and you heard her tell them “Y/N can help you with putting the clothes together! She studies fashion. Yeah, not a doctor but she’s doing a good job” you would be a billionaire.
You remember how shocked your parents were when you told them that you wanted to switch majors. How could they not when you told them that you decided to leave med school for fashion?
But you wouldn’t have taken the step if it weren’t for your longtime best friend – Harry.
You and Harry have been best friends for as long as you could remember, having had been your friend long before you even wore the hijab and you remember when you were 16 after deciding to wear it, having sat him down one day and explained to him what it meant.
He has always been supportive of you, and you, of him. You lost count of how many times you had helped him with his wardrobe choices, and every time he was more thankful that he had someone who was daring with fashion and saw it as he did; a form of expression.
You had a good relationship with his fans long before you decided to enter the fashion blogging world, and maybe fans liked you more because of how carefree and natural you were and how innocent and supportive your friendship with Harry looked. Hell, he talked about you whenever he mentioned his family and if that said anything, it would be that he saw you a Styles, a sister.
It was always fun whenever you styled Harry for an appearance, only so the both of you could sit back and watch their tweets and comments, always freaking out and gushing over how good he looked because of your fashion choices, adding memes along the way.
“How does that look?” You asked him, holding a dress on a hanger of you, looking down at the vibrant green color.
Harry, with 3 shopping bags in his hands and his eyeglasses on, shifted his weight on one leg before bringing his finger to his chin and he looked at the dress. “Think it makes your skin look a little dull, not pop.”
“You think so?” You mumbled as you moved to a mirror, nodding, “You’re right. God, I hate green.”
He chuckled, “No you don’t.”
“Olive green is nice, when we’re talking about trousers and skirts but tops and dresses? No, thanks. Looks good on you though, you lucky bastard.”
“Watch out, you’re looking a little green now, love.” Harry teased, a dimpled smile on his face.
“Oh, shut up, I’m not jealous of you.” You scoffed jokingly, fixing your headscarf to avoid looking at him, “Maybe a little.” You added, laughing quietly as Harry laughed.
“I think they have a beige one, hold on.” Harry’s eyebrows were furrowed in concentration as he looked around before walking towards a rack, searching through the colors of dresses for the one color he knew his best friend loved. “Ha!” Harry smiled in triumph as he reached the color, getting your size before holding it out for you.
You sighed in relief, “You are an angel. Sometimes.”
Harry rolled his eyes at you with a chuckle, handing you the dress before you both agreed to pay and head somewhere to have dessert for a treat.
You smiled at the cashier, watching as her eyes widened as she looked from Harry to you. “How are you?” You asked politely.
“Oh my God. Y-You’re-“ She looked at you before looking at Harry who smiled at her, too, “And you’re-“
“And you’re Sasha. Hi, Sasha.” You giggled, reading her name from her tag, “You know this goof?” You joked, pointing at Harry, “Was following me everywhere here,” you cupped a hand around your mouth, though still speaking at a tone louder than a whisper, “Think he’s a bit of a creep.”
“Hey!” Harry whined but laughed, “Don’t listen to her, love. She’s only doing that because I look better in green.”
It wasn’t unusual for you and Harry to tease each other, and it wasn’t new either that you did it in front of people. Perhaps it’s why people enjoyed being around the both of you together.
“You’re both adorable,” the girl laughed, finally calming from her moment, “I’m a huge fan of the both of you. And Y/N, congratulations on your new collaboration with Tommy Hilfiger. I think it’s amazing that you’re helping in representing more people in the industry.”
Your mischievous expression changed to a softer one, your hand going to your heart as your eyes twinkled.
“Right? Bloody talented that one is.” Harry smiled proudly as he glanced down at you, “Making history as she goes.”
“Aw, stop it, you two. I’m going to cry.” You cooed, “Thank you, Sasha. This means the world to me. Think this made my entire week.”
“It’s no problem,” she beamed, “I wouldn’t let you pay if I owned the store but…” she frowned.
“Hey, no. It’s your right. We all have bills to pay and as much as it would be nice, favors don’t really pay the rent.” You smiled with a shrug, handing her the money.
“Okay, true.” Sasha agreed, packing your dress before handing you the bag. “It was amazing meeting the both of you.”
“You think it’s okay if we get a picture together?” You asked before looking at Harry, “Can you take a picture of us?”
“Yeah, of course.”
“Oh my God,” Sasha fanned herself before letting out a deep breath, shakily handing Harry her phone, “This is the best day I have ever lived in since I started working here.”
You giggled at that, watching her move from behind the cashier before she reached you. The both of you stood beside each other, you wrapping both arms around her as you smiled, her beaming as Harry took the picture – he took 3, just in case the girl didn’t like one of them – before you reached your hand out.
“Here, let me take your picture.” You said, taking the phone from Harry before exchanging places so you can snap a picture of him and the girl together.
As if to tease you, Harry made the same pose as yours, causing you to roll your eyes before you jokingly told him to “be original” to which he wrapped one arm around Sasha while the other was close to his face as he threw a peace sign – a classic Harry pose.
After hugging Sasha goodbye, you and Harry were on your way to his car to go somewhere else to have dessert and maybe spill the latest tea like you always did.
“I’m not so sure about working with them,” You said after taking a sip from your smoothie, resting your chin on your hand as you talked about a brand that had reached you for a collab, “Think they want it so they can look cool, you know? They don’t really care about the message or the representation of hijabi women and I just don’t want to get treated like the next cool trend and hey! Bonus for having a rockstar best friend. It’s ridiculous.”
Harry’s arms were crossed on the table, face showing concentration as he listened intently and nodded in understatement. “I get it. Sorry about that, love,” he sighed, “Wish I can do something about it. Feel helpless when I can’t seem to find any solution to offer.”
“Harry,” you rolled your eyes, “You’ve done enough for people. Besides, you’re growing and learning. This is the best solution.”
“Yeah?” He asked reluctantly, “Just sucks whenever I find the shit they write to you online. Don’t know how you do it.”
“What? Getting told that I’m oppressed even though it was my choice and the racist comments?” You chuckled a little, “Got bothered by it enough already. Just sick of justifying my choices. It’s like,” you thought before your eyebrows went up before pointing at him, “It’s like people with you and how you dress. The mean comments about your choices and the head-scratching comments about why you wear nail polish.”
“Took me long enough to feel comfortable in my skin.” Harry admitted, sighing with a shake of his head, “Wish people would just let people be.”
You shrugged, “Mean people are everywhere, it’s mostly about not letting yourself be one now. I actually feel like we’re at a time when people are unlearning most shit they blindly followed by older generations, the racism, the sexism, the double standards. This is generation is just,” you smiled, “It’s phenomenal, don’t you think?”
Harry joined in, giving you a smile and a nod, “It is. I’m where I am because of all these young people. Music legends are legends and are basically worshipped because of all the young women of their days. Sometimes I can’t even wrap my head around how societies belittle these people so much.”
“Right? They care more about shaping them than helping them unleash all this potential. It’s why they’re so angry sometimes, but so driven. Like, they had enough of silence and are now taking matters in their own hands.” You said, “But to be honest, it’s can be kind of sad sometimes.”
“How so?” Harry asked, sipping his smoothie.
“Like now you have people as young as 13 doing what world leaders should be doing. Really young people trying to teach older people why sexism is wrong and how they can help the Black Lives Matter movement and why they should. They shouldn’t be defending rights and protesting and dying, they should be worrying about their moms not cutting the crust off of their toasts or maybe some high school crushes. But it has to be done, you know? And if world leaders are staying silent, somebody needs to change that even if they’re only 13 for the love of God.”
That was the thing about yours and Harry’s friendship. While you both bickered like children all the time, you also always had heart-to-heart conversations that you couldn’t have with anyone and everyone. It was always comforting.
There were times when you didn’t agree with each other but it was never embarrassing or immature, you’d both state your point of views and find common grounds. It was never about winning an argument because you never could call it an “argument”, just a talk.
“How’s the tour rescheduling going?” You asked, the both of you drifting to another conversation.
//
Tumblr media
harrystyles: Proud of you. Always.
..
fan0 CRYING
fan1 power bffs don’t @ me
fan2 are they dating? pls say yes
↳ fan3 when will people stop ruining friendships with shit like that?
yourinstagram are u sick?
↳ fan4 me when my family is nice to me
↳ fan5 me when my friends invite me to places
↳ harrystyles …
yourinstagram you know it all, H. you’re the best best friend anyone could ever wish for. cool photographer too. ❤❤❤
↳ fan7 HE TOOK THAT PICTURE HE’S SO TALENTED
↳ fan8 Hélène Pambrun who? We only know ✨Harry Styles✨
↳ yourinstagram don’t do my girl Hélène dirty like that
annetwist Looking beautiful! 😘
↳ fan8 I love this friendship sm
↳ yourinstagram says you! miss you loads xx
Tumblr media
yourinstagram: harry out here looking like mr. pringles on a sour cream & onion can and i love it
..
fan0 HAHAH DEAD
fan1 ADHQWJDIEFIGHEFH HONTENT
fan2 y/n taking the piss at harry is my favorite thing
fan3 10 years of y/n giving us the hontent we need and deserve
↳ yourinstagram happy to provide
user aren’t muslims not allowed to drink wine?? why is harry holding one and why are YOU taking a picture of it? Lol
↳ fan4 leave her alone
↳ fan5 you know she’s free to do anything she wants, right?
↳ yourinstagram this is the amazing chef Massimo Bottura’s dark cherry balsamic vinegar but go off
↳ fan6 ENDED
fan7 This friendship makes me sleep better at night
harrystyles Is this because I look good in green?
↳ fan8 AJDGFKJWOI SHOW OFF
↳ fan9 I love them so much
↳ yourinstagram i dislike you sometimes
↳ fan10 ^ me because harry won’t release studio versions of medicine and anna
↳ harrystyles Love you, too.
Tumblr media
 yourinstagram: silky
..
fan0 LOOKS LIKE HARRY’S OUTFIT FROM TOUR IN NETHERLANDS
fan1 imagine looking like that
fan2 this is an au where harry is a hijabi woman
[harrystyles liked this comment.]
↳ fan3 OH MY GOD HE LIKED
↳ fan4 he: confirmed
harrystyles A look.
↳ fan5 I want to thank the queen y/n for teaching harry online lingo
569 notes · View notes
theshedding · 3 years
Text
Lil Nas X: Country Music, Christianity & Reclaiming HELL
Tumblr media
I don’t typically bother myself to follow what Lil Nas X is doing from day to day, or even month to month but I do know that his “Old Town Road” hit became one of the biggest selling/streamed records in Country Music Business history (by a Black Country & Queer artist). “Black” is key because for 75+ years Country music has unsuspiciously evolved into a solidly White-identified genre (despite mixed and Indian & Black roots). Regrettably, Country music is also widely known for anti-black, misogynoir, reliably homophobic (Trans isn’t really a conversation yet), Christian and Hard Right sentiments on the political spectrum. Some other day I will venture into more; there is a whole analysis dying to be done on this exclusive practice in the music industry with its implications on ‘access’ to equity and opportunity for both Black/POC’s and Whites artists/songwriters alike. More commentary on this rigid homogeneous field is needed and how it prohibits certain talent(s) for the sake of perpetuating homogeneity (e.g. “social determinants” of diversity & viable artistic careers). I’ll refrain from discussing that fully here, though suffice it to say that for those reasons X’s “Old Town Road” was monumental and vindicating. 
As for Lil Nas X, I’m not particularly a big fan of his music; but I see him, what he’s doing, his impact on music + culture and I celebrate him using these moments to affirm his Black, Queer self, and lifting up others. Believe it or not, even in the 2020′s, being “out” in the music business is still a costly choice. As an artist it remains much easier to just “play straight”. And despite appearances, the business (particularly Country) has been dragged kicking and screaming into developing, promoting and advancing openly-affirming LGBTQ 🏳️‍🌈 artists in the board room or on-stage. Though things are ‘better’ we have not yet arrived at a place of equity or opportunity for queer artists; for the road of music biz history is littered with stunted careers, bodies and limitations on artists who had no option but to follow conventional ways, fail or never be heard of in the first place. With few exceptions, record labels, radio and press/media have successfully used fear, intimidation, innuendo and coercion to dilute, downplay or erase any hint of queer identity from its performers. This was true even for obvious talents like Little Richard.
(Note: I’m particularly speaking of artists in this regard, not so much the hairstylists, make-up artists, PA’s, etc.)
_____
Tumblr media
Which is why...in regard to Lil Nas X, whether you like, hate or love his music, the young brother is a trailblazer. His very existence protests (at least) decades of inequity, oppression and erasure. X aptly critiques a Neo-Christian Fascist Heteropatriarchy; not just in American society but throughout the Music Business and with Black people. That is no small deal. His unapologetic outness holds a mirror up to Christianity at-large, as an institution, theology and practice. The problem is they just don’t like what they see in that mirror.
In actuality, “Call Me By Your Name”, Lil Nas X’s new video, is a twist on classic mythology and religious memes that are less reprehensible or vulgar than the Biblical narratives most of us grew up on vís-a-vís indoctrinating smiles of Sunday school teachers and family prior to the “age of reason”. Think about the narratives blithely describing Satan’s friendly wager with God regarding Job (42:1-6); the horrific “prophecies” in St. John’s Book of Revelation (i.e. skies will rain fire, angels will spit swords, mankind will be forced to retreat into caves for shelter, and we will be harassed by at least three terrifying dragons and beasts. Angels will sound seven trumpets of warning, and later on, seven plagues will be dumped on the world), or Jesus’s own clarifying words of violent intent in Matthew (re: “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.” 10:34). Whether literal or metaphor, these age old stories pale in comparison to a three minute allegorical rap video. Conservatives: say what you will, I’m pretty confident X doesn’t take himself as seriously as “The true and living God” from the book of Job.
A little known fact as it is, people have debunked the story and evolution of Satan and already offered compelling research showing [he] is more of a literary device than an actual entity or “spirit” (Spoiler: In the Bible, Satan does not take shape as an actual “bad” person until the New Testament). In fact, modern Christianity’s impression of the “Devil” is shaped by conflating Hellenized mythology with a literary tradition rooted in Dante’s Inferno and accompanying spooks and superstitions going back thousands of years. Whether Catholic, Protestant, Mormon, Scientologist, Atheist or Agnostic, we’ve spent a lifetime with these predominant icons and clichés. (Resource: Prof. Bart D. Erhman, “Heaven & Hell”).
So Here’s THE PROBLEM: The current level of fear and outrage is: 
(1) Unjust, imposing and irrational. 
(2) Disproportionate when taken into account a lifetime of harmful Christian propaganda, anti-gay preaching and political advocacy.
(3) Historically inaccurate concerning the existence of “Hell” and who should be scared of going there. 
Think I’m overreacting? 
Examples: 
Institutionalized Homophobia (rhetoric + policy)
Anti-Gay Ministers In Life And Death: Bishop Eddie Long And Rev. Bernice King
Black, gay and Christian, Marylanders struggle with Conflicts
Harlem pastor: 'Obama has released the homo demons on the black man'
Joel Olsteen: Homosexuality is “Not God’s Best”
Bishop Brandon Porter: Gays “Perverted & Lost...The Church of God in Christ Convocation appears like a ‘coming out party’ for members of the gay community.”
Kim Burrell: “That perverted homosexual spirit is a spirit of delusion & confusion and has deceived many men & women, and it has caused a strain on the body of Christ”
Falwell Suggests Gays to Blame for 9-11 Attacks
Pope Francis Blames The Devil For Sexual Abuse By Catholic Church
Pope Francis: Gay People Not Welcome in Clergy
Pope Francis Blames The Devil For Sexual Abuse By Catholic Church
The Pope and Gay People: Nothing’s Changed
The Catholic church silently lobbied against a suicide prevention hotline in the US because it included LGBT resources
Mormon church prohibits Children of LGBT parents to be baptized
Catholic Charity Ends Adoptions Rather Than Place Kid With Same-Sex Couple
I Was a Religious Zealot That Hurt People-Coming Out as Gay: A Former Conversion Therapy Leader Is Apologizing to the LGBTQ Community
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The above short list chronicles a consistent, literal, demonization of LGBTQ people, contempt for their gender presentation, objectification of their bodies/sexuality and a coordinated pollution of media and culture over the last 50+ years by clergy since integration and Civil Rights legislation. Basically terrorism. Popes, Bishops, Pastors, Evangelists, Politicians, Television hosts, US Presidents, Camp Leaders, Teachers, Singers & Entertainers, Coaches, Athletes and Christians of all types all around the world have confused and confounded these issues, suppressed dissent, and confidently lied about LGBT people-including fellow Queer Christians with impunity for generations (i.e. “thou shall not bear false witness against they neighbor” Ex. 23:1-3). Christian majority viewpoints about “laws” and “nature” have run the table in discussions about LGBTQ people in society-so much that we collectively must first consider their religious views in all discussions and the specter of Christian approval -at best or Christian condescension -at worst. That is Christian (and straight) privilege. People are tired of this undue deference to religious opinions. 
That is what is so deliciously bothersome about Lil Nas X being loud, proud and “in your face” about his sexuality. If for just a moment, he not only disrupts the American hetero-patriarchy but specifically the Black hetero-patriarchy, the so-called “Black Church Industrial Complex”, Neo-Christian Fascism and a mostly uneducated (and/or miseducated) public concerning Ancient Near East and European history, superstitions-and (by extension) White Supremacy. To round up: people are losing their minds because the victim decided to speak out against his victimizer. 
Tumblr media
Additionally, on some level I believe people are mad at him being just twenty years old, out and FREE as a self-assured, affirming & affirmed QUEER Black male entertainer with money and fame in the PRIME of his life. We’ve never, or rarely, seen that before in a Black man in the music business and popular culture. But that’s just too bad for them. With my own eyes I’ve watched straight people, friends, Christians, enjoy their sexuality from their elementary youth to adolescence, up and through college and later marriages, often times independently of their spouses (repeatedly). Meanwhile Queer/Gay/SGL/LGBTQ people are expected to put their lives on hold while the ‘blessed’ straight people run around exploring premarital/post-marital/extra-marital sex, love and affection, unbound & un-convicted by their “sin” or God...only to proudly rebrand themselves later in life as a good, moral “wholesome Christian” via the ‘sacred’ institution of marriage with no questions asked. 
Inequality defined.
For Lil Nas X, everything about the society we've created for him in the last 100+ years (re: links above) has explicitly been designed for his life not to be his own. According to these and other Christians (see above), his identity is essentially supposed to be an endless rat fuck of internal confusion, suicide-ideation, depression, long-suffering, faux masculinity, heterosexism, groveling towards heaven, respectability politics, failed prayer and supplication to a heteronormative earthly and celestial hierarchy unbothered in affording LGBT people like him a healthy, sane human development. It’s almost as if the Conservative establishment (Black included) needs Lil Nas X to be like others before him: “private”, mysteriously single, suicidal, suspiciously straight or worse, dead of HIV/AIDS ...anything but driving down the street enjoying his youth as a Black Queer artist and man. So they mad about that?
Well those days are over.  
-Rogiérs is a writer, international recording artist, performer and indie label manager with 25+ years in the music industry. He also directs Black Nonbelievers of DC, a non-profit org affiliated with the AHA supporting Black skeptics, Atheists, Agnostics & Humanists. He holds a B.A. in Music Business & Mgmt and a M.A. in Global Entertainment & Music Business from Berklee College of Music and Berklee Valencia, Spain. www.FibbyMusic.net Twitter/IG: @Rogiers1
Tumblr media Tumblr media
91 notes · View notes
mrsalwayswrite · 3 years
Text
To Call Forth Love - Chapter 6
Haha, I’m so excited for this chapter. Please let me know what y’all think! Also a huge thank you to everyone who has liked/commented/reblogged. You guys deserve all the love and cookies possible! 
Warnings: swearing, fluff (i think that’s it, sorry if i miss something)
Words: 7300 (i feel like my chapters keep getting longer. oops?)
Tag List: @heavenly1927 @youbloodymadgenius @zuxiezendler @punkrocknpearls​
Series Masterlist
Tumblr media
The aroma of coffee surrounded Kari like a warm, comforting blanket. The café was just the perfect amount of busy, there were a few other tables occupied but without feeling cramped or overwhelming. The lunch rush was just beginning, indicated by the number of patrons standing in line to order now. 
 The brunette sipped on her latte as she slowly swiped through the pictures on Gyda's phone. The two were finally meeting up for an early lunch and coffee after a yoga class. Gyda had been gushing about the trip she just returned from to Phnom Penh, telling stories of the week she spent there and letting Kari slide through the pictures on her phone. 
 "These are just gorgeous. Gods, you have the best job, I swear."
 Gyda laughed, picking at the muffin in front of her. "I know. I can't imagine doing anything else though."
 "When do you leave again?"
 "Mmmm…. I’m not sure yet. The company is wanting me to go to Vancouver, British Columbia next. I might wait until the end of September to go. I'm not sure. Either way, it won't be for at least a month. Depends on how soon I want to go visit mom."
 "Why wouldn't you want to go soon?" Kari perked up at the mention of Gyda's mother. She knew the two were close, but all she really knew about Lagertha was from what Ivar told her.
 "I'm not a fan of her new boyfriend. Sorry, she prefers the term "lover". Kalf works for her, specifically with contacts from their Mediterranean partners and overseeing some of the shipments."
 "Why don't you like him?" She swiped to the next image, a stunning picture of the Cambodian royal palace. 
 The blonde waved her hand vaguely, as if swatting a fly. "He hasn't done anything; I just don't like him."
 "That's fair. Does he treat your mom well?"
 "Yeah. She just has shit luck with men and I'm worried how this one will turn out." She sipped on her coffee, gazing out the nearby window for a moment. 
 Kari turned back to the phone, guessing there was more that Gyda was not saying. Not that she needed to know. No, she had enough drama in her life currently and his name was Ivar. 
 Both women lounged in the wooden café chairs, still in their yoga clothes, having come straight from the studio. Except Gyda changed her footwear, losing the sandals for a pair of wedge heels that made her long legs look like skyscrapers. It was hard not to envy Gyda's body, and Torvi for that matter. They both had the perfect hourglass figure, with all the right assets and gorgeously braided, blonde hair. Maybe it was some standard that women around the Lothbroks had perfect bodies. It made Kari wonder why Ivar paid her any attention then. Her body was far from perfect. Her chest side was decent, but she always thought her hips and thighs were too large. Most likely leftover critiques from her mother who not-so-lovingly would say Kari was pear-shaped and needed to focus on losing all that extra or no man would want her. Not that she was trying to get a man. Over the past two years she had finally come to embrace her body and was learning to be comfortable in her own skin. Though some days were better than others. It was still difficult to watch Gyda receive appreciative looks from many of the patrons as they passed by their table and know none of them would even give her a second glance. The blonde was effortlessly beautiful. Perhaps there was a way for her to teach Kari that. 
 Suddenly Gyda zeroed in on the brunette with a mischievous gleam in her eyes. "Speaking about men…."
 "Are you going on a date?" 
 Gyda snorted, with an amused grin on her face. "Hell no. I'm not interested in a relationship right now. I am perfectly fine being single. Stop changing the subject. There is a little something going around the Lothbrok rumor mill that Ivar took you on a date to Casa mia, Maggiore."
 "Not a date, it was just as friends." Kari clarified. 
 She gave her an incredulous look. "Just friends?"
 "Yes."
 Gyda narrowed her eyes at her. 
 "What? We went out to Casa mia, Maggiore and then I convinced him to go to Masterpiece. After he dropped me back off at home. Nothing happened."
 "Right…." Gyda hummed. "So, it was a date."
 Kari dropped her face into her hands with a groan. "Not a date. Just friends."
 "Whatever you say. Just know Ivar doesn't take just anyone to his favorite restaurant. Hell, I think he only took his ex there once in the ten months they were dating. He usually only goes with Aslaug."
 "Oh? Um, I didn't know…" The brunette hated how she perked up at this new information. It should not matter hearing that he never took anyone, that it really was his favorite restaurant and he wanted to share it with her. In their texting, he made reference to when they went back, what food he wanted her to try next. Something apparently, he was not even inclined to do with an ex. No, none of that should matter. But it did, and the way her heart swelled at the realization only proved that to her. 
 "Clearly he really likes you to take you there. Do you like him?"
 "Sure, he's a good friend."
 Gyda sighed dramatically, tipping her head back. "You're killing me, Kari! Fine! When was this not-date? A week ago?"
 "Eight days, yeah."
 "Have you hung out since then?"
 "Yeah, he picked me up once and we went out for dinner. Another time, he took me out on my lunch break. He had to go on a business trip so I haven't seen him in…. three days?"
 "Right. I'm guessing he's blowing up your phone while he's been gone?"
 Kari took a sip of her drink as she mumbled, "sort of." The truth was they were practically texting non-stop. It was mostly discussions, and arguments on his side, of superficial things like TV shows, the proper time to wake up in the morning and her lack of clothing that was more than yoga attire. Other times they sent memes back and forth or links to funny YouTube clips. Kari never realized how lonely she was before Ivar thrust himself into her life with all the force and subtlety of a rocket. 
 "What does that mean?" Gyda eyed her for a long moment before she gasped and slapped the table. "Oh shit! Is he sending you dick pics?"
 Kari choked on air. After hacking for a couple of seconds, tears coming to her eyes because of the action, she vigorously shook her head. "No! No! Ewww....no! We keep sending stupid memes to each other and talking about where we should go out next. That's it. I promise."
 The blonde laughed loudly at Kari's reaction, who fiddled with her earring, face burning with embarrassment. The two sat quietly for a couple of minutes, sipping their drinks and watching the line of lunch patrons increase. 
 "So…. it kind of sounds like you're dating."
 "No, we're just friends. Why can't friends just hang out?" Kari tried to argue. The beginning tendrils of annoyance creeping in at constantly having to defend their friendship. 
 Gyda stared at her. "Have you made-out?"
 A blush colored Kari's cheeks before she could figure out a good enough lie, giving away the truth. 
 "What?! How often?!" Her enthusiastic friend cried, before waving her hand once again. "Never mind. Listen, he's taking you out to his favorite restaurant. He is clearly going out of his way to spend time with you. He is texting you! You don't realize how big of a deal this is for him! He generally hates people. I'm positive he has murder plans for most of those he is forced to be around. Does he know you're just friends? Because to me, it doesn't sound like it."
 Kari covered her face with her hands, tears of frustration springing to her eyes. Ivar and her could only be friends, that was what she promised herself. If he knew her, the real her…. it would never happen. He would never want her. So it was best to remain friends, to protect both of them from the inevitability that anything more would never happen. Even though their line of friendship was blurring…. and that was the worst part. She found herself wishing to continue to blur that line, even when she knew it would only end in disaster. Taking a deep breath, she could smell his cologne, a scent she had become so used to now. Her mind could easily conjure the feeling of being in his arms, his mouth on hers as she gave in under his touch. She cared for him, deep down she knew more than a friend. Although he could annoy her to no end, she enjoyed his presence, his humor, that vulnerable side that peeked out occasionally, how he made her feel safe and beautiful. 
 Now hearing Gyda pointedly telling her that Ivar was treating her as more than a friend. It left her speechless and wondering if she was making a mistake. 
 Gyda’s tone softened when she spoke next. "Why are you so set on just friends?"
 "I just…. I don't want to date right now. After my last relationship, I just want to focus on myself."
 "That's fair but listen, he isn't going to wait around for you forever."
 "I know. I don't want him too." She admitted, tugging on her earring. Though her statement was the truth, it still tasted bitter on her tongue. 
 "Ok, but does he know that? It sounds like he’s set on you, but I'm going to warn you. Don't break his heart. He isn't the type to recover from heartbreak. His heart is already locked up more securely than Fort Knox but if you break it…."
 "I promise, that isn't my intent. I just…. can't. I like him, more than I thought I would. He is funny and charming and sweet but also infuriating and demanding and I've had more fun with him than I've ever had with a guy friend before. He…. I can be myself around him and I think he can too. But I just…. It can't go further than friendship."
 Gyda mulled over her words. "Alright. I don't fully understand but I get it. It's nice to hear that he's connecting with someone. None of us liked his ex. He only really spends time with family or Floki."
 "I don't want to hurt him." Kari whispered. 
 "I know. You're too sweet to purposefully do something like that." The blonde tilted her head to the side with a slowly growing smug look. "I give it until the end of the year and you'll be naked in his bed."
 "Gods! What? Why would you say that?"
 "He's a Lothbrok. They always get what they want."
 *****
 Kari laid curled up on her full-size bed, her laptop up and watching Downton Abbey. A heating pad rested on her abdomen as she waited for the pain relievers to kick in. Most of her life she was happy with, but the one thing she would easily trade out would be the painful cramps when PMSing. The birth control she took helped out, but there was usually still one day that the dreaded cramps hit hard. 
 Her phone dinged. Languidly reaching over, she grabbed it from beside her pillow and opened it to check the text. 
 Ivar: wat r u doin?
 He texted her earlier that day saying he was returning home from his sudden business trip. 
 Kari: nothing
 Ivar: good. bts. 
 She groaned, slamming her face into her pillow. She did not have the energy to deal with him right now. All she wanted was to relax and eat her body weight in chocolate. After a moment of self-pity, she texted him back, hoping she could get out of whatever he had planned already. 
 Kari: no, I don't feel good.
 Ivar: wat wrong?
 Kari: nothing bad.  
 Sure, they had been talking daily for over a week but that did not mean she wanted to divulge her period issues to him. There were a few things she knew and one was that guys did not like talking about the menstrual cycle. 
 When he did not text back right away, she turned her attention back to her laptop and the TV show playing. Soon enough the magic of pain relievers and hot pads kicked in and her pain was minimal, though she had no intentions of leaving her warm cocoon. Alana was at her night class, so Kari was home alone. Not unusual really, but tonight she certainly felt the urge to lay around and do nothing. 
 After about twenty minutes, she heard a loud knock on her front door. Alana was not home, so it could not be any of her friends. Her neighbor, Erik, never just showed up. He always made sure to text before coming to her door. Maybe there was some kind of emergency? Or a package being dropped off? Though at this time it was certainly getting late for any kind of deliveries. Then it hit her. 
 Ivar. 
 "Ughhhh," she groaned, rolling out of her bed. For a split second she contemplated not answering it, just staying in her warm bed. She knew, though, if she did not get it, he would probably bust the door down. Maybe even set it on fire to make a point. He seemed like the type to light things on fire for fun. 
 As soon as she opened the front door, those intense blue eyes scanned over her body as if looking for some unseen disease. "What's wrong with you?" He barked at her, one hand still on the doorframe.
 "What?" She blinked owlishly. 
 "You said you don't feel good." He gestured towards her, his gaze still searching. "What's wrong?"
 "Um, it's nothing. Just cramps. It's better now."
 "You sure? It's nothing worse?"
 She was touched by his concern, the way his last questions were said in a breath of relief as if actually worried about her health. "Yeah, happens every month. I'm fine."
 "Ok, good. Get changed, Hvitty and I are going to see a movie. I want you to come with us."
 "Ivar, you should hang out with your brother…."
 "I fucking live with him. He's fine with it. Go change."
 She sighed, knowing by now there was no way she was making it back to her warm cocoon and Downton Abbey. Besides, she had missed him while he was gone and found herself wanting to spend time with him. Not that she wanted him to know that, it would only inflate his ego. "I'll only agree to come with you on two conditions."
 "Fucking what?" He growled, though she could see the amusement in his eyes. 
 "First, I'm wearing my comfy clothes." She waved her hand at the pair of soft, black leggings she wore and the thin, slouchy sweater with the word 'beautiful' printed on it. "Second, and this is the most important condition, you have to buy me a stupid amount of chocolate."
 He rolled his eyes, but a smile tugged on his lips. "If that's all, princess…."
 "Oh, give me a minute. I'll think of something else… and it's not princess. It's m'lady."
 "Shut up. Get your shit. I'll meet you at the car."
 She laughed as she raced up to her room to grab her purse, not even bothering to change out of her clothes. The only addition was to throw on a zip up jacket that was a size too big on her. She always found movie theaters too cold to be fully comfortable without a jacket. 
 The vehicle waiting for her this time was a luxury SUV. She stopped for a moment in the driveway, unsure what to do. She wondered what the neighbors would think of her getting picked up in this and how many knew Lothbroks were sitting in it. Hopefully no one was paying attention. The one of the back doors opened so she headed that way. Ivar slid over and she followed him into the vehicle, closing the door behind her. 
 "Took you fucking long enough, m'lady."
 She smirked at the nickname. "Well, you did just show up at my door and told me we were going to see a movie. At least the other times you gave me a heads up to be ready."
 "Ivar, you said you text her we were coming." A man she had not noticed said. He sat across on the bench seat facing them, watching her curiously. It was now Kari noticed how both Ivar and the guy were dressed casually, both in jeans and t-shirts, though Ivar had a light jacket on also. 
 "She said she wasn't doing anything." 
 The flaxen-haired man sighed, before reaching his hand out. "Hi, I'm Hvitserk. This idiot's older brother."
 "It's nice to meet you. I'm Kari." She took his hand, but instead of shaking it like she expected, he turned it over and pressed a lingering kiss to the back of her hand. When he released it, he gave her a quick, flirty wink and leaned back in his seat. 
 Startled by his bold action, she looked at Ivar, unsure how to respond. What was with these Lothbroks and their unabashed flirting? 
 He had his eyes narrowed at his brother, teeth practically grinding. "Fucking touch her again." He snarled. 
 Hvitserk chuckled, a smug look on his boyish face. "Relax, brother. I know you don't share…. even if you're just friends." Either he was purposefully antagonizing his younger brother or did not notice the anger seething off of him. 
 Ivar started to lean forward but Kari wrapped her arms around his, pulling him into her. She was not about to watch a fight go down between the two. "Didn't you just get back from your trip? I thought you'd be home resting." She quickly asked, trying to distract. 
 After a long moment of the brothers staring at each other, Ivar with a glare and Hvitserk looking amused, the raven-haired brother leaned back. He turned his head to look at her as he answered. "You said you wanted to see me earlier, and going to see a movie isn't strenuous."
 "Everything involving you is strenuous."
 As soon as she muttered the words, she wished she could take them back. 
 A devilish grin spread across his face, those blue eyes dancing with something mischievous and forbidden. "I can show you strenuous." He shifted to hover over her, lips dangerously close to hers. "All. Night. Long." He whispered, one hand leaving a trail of fire as it slid from her thigh up to the curve of her breast. A shiver ran down her spine at the low, hungry tone and the naked want in his gaze. "You'll be begging for more of me…. to destroy that pussy and leave you completely undone and hoarse from screaming my name." His tongue flicked at her earlobe, a choked gasp leaving her mouth at the sensation. Her eyes fluttered shut on their own accord, the knot in her core tightening painfully. She both hated and loved what his touch did to her, how it gave her a taste of pleasure otherwise unknown. His nose traced her jawline as he spoke again, tone filthy, making her core ache. "You'd like that, wouldn't you, kattungen?"
 She gulped, her voice coming out far more timid and needy than she wanted. "That's...um, that's nice." 
 Hvitserk's laughter broke the smoldering tension. Her blue-green eyes blinked rapidly as if wakening from a dream, darting to stare at the older brother before returning to the one who still lingered over her, his presence alone keeping her pinned to her seat. 
 "En dag, søte Kari, blir du min." Ivar whispered into her ear, then kissed her temple tenderly. After he leaned back, legs splayed out and arms across the back of the seat. A rapid conversation in that foreign language started, Hvitserk saying something that had Ivar snarking back and rolling his eyes. 
 The whole time, Kari focused on slowing down her breathing and trying to tamper down the warmth radiating from her core. There was no denying it, Ivar did something to her on a primal level. Her body wanted him. Even her mind wanted him. When he directed that sensual, seductive side at her, she melted like an ice cube in June. Her panties were testimony to that. Thankfully, he did not turn that powerful ability onto her frequently. She doubted they would remain 'just friends' for long if he did. 
 Suddenly, Ivar tugged on the sleeve of her fleece jacket, drawing her from her thoughts. "What is that?"
 "Um… a jacket?"
 He hummed then glanced over at his brother. "Sigurd had the same one, doesn't he, Hvitty?"
 "I think so." Hvitserk ran a hand over his braids, a smile on his lips. "Didn't you set it on fire?"
 Ivar waved off the question, still scrutinizing her jacket.  "Whose is it?"
 "Mine now." She replied, wondering what he was getting at. 
 "Whose was it?"
 "A guy friend. He lent it to me years ago and I never gave it back."
 "He's in England?"
 "Yeah…"
 He grunted, rubbing a hand over his mouth for a moment. "Take it off."
 "Wha…. what?" She sputtered. 
 "Take it off. I don't want you wearing another guy's clothes."
 "Ivar, this is stupid. Plus, I always get cold in movie theaters. That's why I brought it in the first place."
 With a deep scowl, he tugged off his own gray, soft shell jacket. When he saw she was not moving, he tugged on her sleeve roughly. She huffed but gave in, not willing to fight him over something so childish. She slipped the fleece jacket off and placed it in her lap. Before she could stop him, Ivar snatched the jacket out of her lap and threw it on the seat to his other side. He dropped his jacket in her lap then leaned back, watching her with a serious expression. This was one of those times she wondered why she put up with him. Who cared where the origins of her clothes came from? It was comfy. Sure, it had some sentimental value but it was a nice, warm jacket. 
 Quickly, she slipped his gray jacket on…. and was immediately hit with his scent. A salacious side of her wondered if he would let her keep it. He always smelled incredible and having his jacket now wrapped around her, enveloping her in that…. her libido definitely woke up, begging for attention. Especially after the tease he just bestowed upon her.  
 "Happy?" She asked flippantly, smoothing the gray jacket down over her and trying not to be obvious with her sniffing it. 
 He grinned. "You look better in my clothes."
 "Ugh. Is he always like this?" She turned to Hvitserk.  
 "I wouldn't know. He's never asked me to take my clothes off. But if you did, I'd happily oblige." He playfully winked at her. 
 She groaned. "You both are unbelievable. No wonder you're brothers." She looked at Ivar beside her. "Can I have my jacket back?"
 He raised a single eyebrow as if surprised by her question. After a second of mutual staring, he slid over and opened the window, maintaining pointed eye contact the whole time. Before she could process what he was going to do, he balled up her jacket and threw it out the open window. Without a word, he rolled the window back up and slid over to her side again. 
 "What jacket?" He questioned impishly. 
 She stared open-mouthed at him. "Was…. was that really necessary? Gods! Why did you do that?" 
 "I don't want you wearing another guy's clothes." He shrugged. "If it's that big of a problem, I'll buy you some new clothes."
 "That's not…. that's not the point! You can't just get rid of something of mine without my permission!"
 "But it wasn't yours, it was some guy friend's."
 She covered my face with her hands. Why should she expect anything different from Ivar? He had a vendetta against her clothes. With a sigh, she scooted away from him. "I feel like we need to make a list of things that are not ok for you to do."
 "I'm not following some fucking list."
 "Alright, I'll stop wearing clothes that belong to someone else if you promise not to throw away my clothes without my permission."
 He yanked on her arm until she was at his side again, despite her half-hearted attempt for space. "You can wear my clothes anytime, especially if I can take them off of you."
 "Ivar, I'm serious."
 He nuzzled the crook of her neck, making her squirm. Sweetly, he pressed a kiss to her neck before leaning back. "Fine." He muttered, tucking her into his side. 
 She glanced over at Hvitserk, having momentarily forgotten his presence. A broad smile covered his face, highlighting his handsome features. 
 "I like her." He declared, meeting his brother's eye with a nod. Next he looked at her, cocking his head to the side. "What are you doing with his sorry ass?"
 That earned a low growl from the youngest Lothbrok, causing Kari to jump faintly and Hvitserk's smile to grow.
 "Well, I didn't have much of a choice. He showed up at my work the first time." She answered honestly, though she mostly did it to tease Ivar. 
 Hvitserk threw his head back with a groan before narrowing his eyes at his brother. "I told you not to stalk her!"
 "What the fuck is this? Gang up on Ivar day? She wouldn't have gone out with me otherwise and afterward she said she had fun, so it's not a big deal."
 Hvitserk's brown eyes met her blue-green ones with true sympathy in them. "I'm sorry, Kari. I would say he isn't normally like this but I'm guessing you know that's a damn lie by now."
 She giggled, "Yeah, I do. Thank you though."
 "You know, we could always ditch him and go to the movie just us."
 "Oh yeah?" She tapped her chin, pretending to think the offer over. "That sounds like fun. Ivar did promise to buy me a stupid amount of chocolate though. It'd be a hard sell to pass that offer up."
 "I'm sure I can come up with something." He wiggled his blond eyebrows, smiling again. 
 "Shut the fuck up, both of you." 
 Kari laughed at the look on Ivar's face. Peering up at him, she changed the subject. "What movie are we seeing?"
 "Ask your new friend over there."
 "Come on, Ivy. You know we're just fucking with you." Hvitserk sighed.  
 Ivar grumbled, looking out the window and ignoring both of them.
 Hvitserk answered her question. "That new horror movie."
 "Oh ok." She hoped she sounded confident but kind of wished she had known before coming. Horror movies were not her thing. As a child, she had watched 'IT' at a sleepover and decided then that purposefully being scared was something she could do without. Though knowing Ivar, he would have laughed and pushed her out the door, saying something about how she needed to watch better shit than she normally did. Maybe this one would be more action-based than real horror. She could only hope. 
 Thankfully, they pulled up at the movie theater soon after. The driver dropped the three off at the door, driving off after to go park and wait. 
 "Ivar, hold on." She tugged on his arm, forcing him to slow his steps instead of walking ahead of the other two. "Give us a minute, Hvitserk."
 The blond brother gave her a quick nod. "I'll go buy some snacks."
 After he walked away, she tried to meet Ivar's gaze, though he pointedly stared over her shoulder. "Hey, we're just teasing. I'm sorry if we pushed it too far. I'm really happy you asked me to come out with you and your brother. It's been years since I've gone out to the movies."
 He remained stubbornly sullen, continuing to stare just over her shoulder as if her presence was a nuisance. 
 With a sigh, she shifted closer, taking the initiative to wrap her arms loosely around his waist. Something she had noticed during the times they had hung out was he liked touching her, not always sexually, but just casual, intimate touches. A stray thought of him being touch-starved crossed her mind. 
 "I also really like your jacket, it's soft and it smells like you." She softly said, peeking up at him, suddenly nervous about her forwardness. 
 "Yeah?" He breathed out, placing his arms around her and tugging her closer. In just that movement, she could feel the hostility drain out of him, the hard tension in his muscles easing away into a softness she was beginning to doubt many people were allowed to see. 
 "Since you threw my other one away, can I keep this one?" She teased, lips curling up at the edges. If he said no, she was inclined to steal it anyway. For emotional damages, of course, not because it smelled good. 
 "Fuck, yes, kitten." He nuzzled her neck, making her squirm in his arms and giggle at the sensation. After a moment, still chuckling, he kissed her neck then laid his forehead against hers. When he spoke, it was with a quiet hint of vulnerability, his voice just above a murmur. "You really are happy to be out with me?"
 "I am." She confirmed with eyes closed, soaking in the heat from his body against hers. This moment felt so strangely intimate that she struggled between prolonging it or tearing herself away. It was in these touches, she found her resolve wavering, a longing rising within her to give in. His arms around her, just holding her, their foreheads pressed together as if grounding one another. It was euphoric and dangerous. 
 He broke the silence between them, tone muffled as if regretting speaking up. "We should go in; the movie is going to start soon."
 "Ok. Hvitserk will probably come looking for us if we don't." 
 "Ah, fuck. He will." 
 They untangled, but as she moved to step away, he snaked his arm around her waist, tugging her next to him. When she glanced up at him, he only looked down at her in wide-eyed, mock innocence. She rolled her eyes but giggled. He was like a puppy afraid to let go of his new toy. 
 As they started towards the doors, she finally paid more attention to his gait. Each step was stiff but powerful. One more than one occasion she ogled him and his swagger that seemed to scream predator, a dark and deadly thing meanwhile also being so enticing. She wondered how he managed so well without his cane but decided not to bring it up.
 Once they passed through the door, Ivar slowed down, pulling his phone from his pocket. 
 "Shit. I've got to take this. Go wait with Hvitty. Oh, here." He pulled out his wallet and handed her his credit card. "Go buy all that chocolate I promised you and drinks for us."
 Normally she would protest, saying she could buy her own stuff. This time she had full intentions of spending his money on chocolate. "Do you want anything to eat?" 
 "Are you on the menu?"
 "Gods, unbelievable!" She laughed though, watching him smile genuinely. After an arrogant wink, he stepped away, bringing his phone to his ear and speaking rapidly in a foreign language. She scurried over to Hvitserk, who stood near the confessions counter. 
 "Everything alright?" 
 "Yeah," she glanced over her shoulder at Ivar quickly, "he just got a phone call he said he had to take."
 Hvitserk hummed, watching Ivar across the lobby with a peculiar expression. 
 While they waited, she ordered her snacks and the drinks for both of them. Though her doubts rapidly spun out of control as she realized she did not know what Ivar would like or want. With a pleading look thrown at him, Hvitserk gave in with a chuckle. Together they picked out snacks and drinks that would have the youngest Lothbrok's approval. Once done, they gathered their stuff and moved over to an open, standing table to continue waiting. 
 "While Ivar is busy, I wanted to talk to you."
 "Ah, sure." She felt a tendril of dread grow in her belly. Nothing good ever came out of a conversation with such an inauspicious beginning. 
 "I know Ivar can be a lot, closer to fucking insane, and not many people can tolerate him." He looked down at her with brown eyes that seemed to see more than they let on. "But you're good for him. You don't take his bullshit. Fuck, he even listens to you. I could count on one hand how many people Ivar actually listens to. What makes you different?"
 "I don't know. I'm just…. I don't know." She stared down at her chipped, teal fingernails, unable to meet his eyes now. 
 "Well whatever you are, we've already noticed a difference since you two started talking. He's not as angry, he doesn't just hole up in his room as often."
 "That's good."
 "Mmmm…. Ivar is my brother and I love him. But I also know his temper can get the better of him and when he is on a rampage, nothing can fucking stop him. He is easily jealous and possessive of things he deems his own…. and he clearly had staked a claim on you."
 "But…. we're just friends."
 "Not to him." He huffed, running a hand over his braids. After checking to make sure his brother was still on the phone, he continued, lowering his voice even more. "You seem like a nice girl so I'll only say this once. Be careful of what promises you make to him…. and if he ever does something to harm you or scare you, I want you to call me. I'll do what I can to protect you. Alright?"
 She nodded, unnerved by his warning. Sure, she knew about the Lothbrok reputation. Yet this was the first time someone point blank warned her with true understanding. She was unsure if she should appreciate the warning or be terrified that he thought Ivar could hurt her. 
 "Give me your phone."
 Silently, she handed it over. He plugged his number in and called himself. With a satisfied nod, he gave it back to her. 
 "Good, don't ever hesitate to call me. Besides, if my brother has his way, none of us would ever meet you. My other brothers want to meet the girl who has Ivar wrapped around her finger already." He winked at her, making her blush. 
 "Hvitty, stop flirting with her!" 
 The flaxen-haired brother grinned, as he watched his brother approach. "I'm not. Just telling her the others want to meet her."
 "Fuck no." Ivar growled, coming to stand between the two. 
 "I'd love to meet your brothers." She commented lightly. "After hearing you talk about them, it'd be nice."
 "Awww, Ivy, you talk about us?" Hvitserk teased, nudged his shoulder with his own. 
 "Not you, asshole."
 Hvitserk laughed, pressing his forehead swiftly to Ivar's. "Come on, the movie has probably started."
 Ivar and Kari followed behind Hvitserk, as he led them to the correct auditorium. Along the way, she handed Ivar a couple of the boxes of candy she bought and the drink picked out for him. 
 "How much fucking candy did you buy?" He grumbled, eyeing the boxes suspiciously. 
 "Enough. If you ask nicely, I might share." She quipped. "I even bought Heksehyl for both of us. Hvitserk said it's your favorite…. and I also got Dumle. Oh, and Guld Barre!" 
 "I did promise you chocolate."
 She giggled. "Yes, you did."
 The three of them found the auditorium and took seats off to the side. Ivar sat in the middle with Kari on his right and Hvitserk on his left. The movie had just started as they sat down, the lights and noise minimal. Though apprehensive about the movie, Kari found herself smiling at just the nostalgic feeling being here evoked. There was something so simple yet profound at being with friends, eating sweets and watching the silver screen. Let alone the darkness of the theater and the nearby munching of popcorn by others and the occasion sound of people talking. She missed this. So, she endowed to enjoy every part of this. Quietly eating her chocolates, she kept her gaze on the screen.
 After some time, Kari felt a large hand on her upper thigh, inching slowly higher and higher. Jolting at the sudden feeling, she grabbed it, trying to stop its further ascent. Immediately, Ivar flipped his hand over and entwined their fingers. She tried to half-heartedly tug out of it, but he maintained a vice-like grip on her hand. In an attempt to glare at him, she swiveled in her seat to gain his attention. Only for him to remain solely focused on the screen. Rolling her eyes, she gave in, shifting back to continue watching the movie. Their fingers remained entangled. 
 Eventually, the chocolate lay forgotten in her lap as the images on the screen became more disturbing and graphic. A few chuckles came from Ivar and Hvitserk and whispered comments made between them. Once someone in the theater screamed as a person on the screen was suddenly killed. The abrupt sound made Kari jump, squeezing Ivar's hand. He laughed, but squeezed her hand back. Not long after, she gave up on watching the movie and just tucked her face against his shoulder. Horror movies were never her thing, the idea of purposefully being scared never appealed to her. And this movie had a thing for people being eaten alive. Not something she wanted imprinted into her brain. The thought crossed her mind that Ivar orchestrated this on purpose, since he seemed to be fully enjoying her cuddling into him. As if without concern, his head lay on top of hers, continuing to hold her hand. If she was not so concerned about having nightmares and trying to block out the hair-raising screams, she might have liked the cuddling. In this instance though, if he moved, she was going to punch him. 
 Once the movie ended, Ivar and Hvitserk argued about the movie- how some of the people should have died or about the graphics of the terrifying creatures. They both became more and more animated as the three of them walked out of the movie theater and towards the waiting SUV. 
 "What did you think, Kari?" Hvitserk asked, taking his seat across from the others, once they all piled in. 
 "She was scared." Ivar answered, leaning back, his arm on the back of the seat and behind her. 
 "That creature was eating that girl's brain while she was still alive! I did not want to see that! I'm going to have nightmares."
 Smirking, Ivar tilted closer, invading her personal space. "Want me to stay with you? I'll keep you safe…. and make sure you dream of other more, pleasurable, things."
 "No, you'd probably try to scare me on purpose." She accused, pushing his body away from her with a pout. 
 "Well, thanks for seeing it with us." Hvitserk spoke up. "Gods, Bjorn would love it. We'll have to tell him."
 The youngest brother nodded before turning back to the brunette by his side. "You coming out with us for drinks now? We always get drinks after."
 "No, I can't. I have to open tomorrow. I need to sleep."
 "Come on, it'll be fine."
 "No. I'll be getting up at 5:30. That's in like…. six hours." This was one thing she was not going to give into. He had dragged her from her bed already once tonight. He was not about to make her lose out on anymore sleep. Not everyone was able to sleep all morning like certain people. 
 "Next time," Hvitserk said with a shrug, a grin on his face as if amused by the interaction across from him. "I'm sure we can all go out again soon. Right, Ivy?"
 Ivar snorted, "Fine. We'll drop you off."
 A discussion about the movie and comparing it to others swiftly captured the two brothers' attention. Finding herself growing tired, Kari just leaned back and listened, her head resting on the back of the seat, and consequently, Ivar's arm. It was different and refreshing seeing him interact with someone he clearly trusted and cared about. His guard was down and even if some of his comments sounded more like sharp barbs, it was said without true malice. The flaxen-haired brother took each verbal jab like water off a duck's back, either making a joke out of the comment or ignoring it. Throughout the interaction, the care and respect for one another was evident, even if on the surface level it appeared dysfunctional. A smile hinted on her lips as she listened to the brothers. She hoped this was not the last time she spent time with Hvitserk. Though his warning still rang in the back of her mind, she liked him. The whole ride back, Ivar kept his arm behind her, sporadically playing with the ends of her hair. 
 At their arrival to her townhouse, Hvitserk said his goodbye to her in the vehicle, surprising her with a swift hug and peck on the cheek. Her face must have been quite flushed if his laughter after meant anything. Ivar grumbled something at his brother in their foreign language as he pulled her out of the SUV. To her further surprise, Ivar walked her to her front door instead of staying with his brother. 
 "Thanks for inviting me out." She said honestly, once they reached the door. 
 "Next time we'll watch something you enjoy."
 Before she could second guess herself, she stepped closer and wrapped her arms around him. Instantly, his arms went around her, pulling her closer. While the hug at the movie theater was sweet and intimate, this hug carried a different tone. It was more urgent and passionate. Her face rested on his collarbone, allowing his scent to envelope her. He laid a soft kiss to the top of her head, resting his chin there after. For a split second, she realized she never wanted to leave this moment. To be safe and warm and comforted and wanted. It was all she had ever hoped for. This was dangerous water they treaded in. With each intimate action, she could feel their friendship sailing closer and closer to the waters of something more. The gentle, easy waters of friendship would not be enough to maintain them. 
 With that thought in mind, she regretfully pulled back. "Goodnight." She murmured. 
 "God natt, kattunge."
 "One of these days, you have to tell me what you're saying."
 A devious smirk grew on his lips. "No, I think I like you being in suspense."
 She laughed, shaking her head. They both hesitated to move, the air tense with something, as if both were waiting for the other to say or do something. 
 "Ok, bye." She finally said, opening her front door. 
 He nodded, taking a step back without removing his heated gaze off of her. 
 Shuddering at the feeling of his smoldering gaze, she let herself into the townhouse and made sure to lock the door behind her. Releasing a deep breath, she leaned her back against the door. What was it about him that tempted her so? He was bad news for her. Yet the more time she spent with him, the more she craved being with him. 
 Glancing down, she stared at his soft, gray jacket she still wore and wondered how symbolic this unintended action was.
68 notes · View notes