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#really i don't know how tumblr works send help
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Hello, I’m so glad that this blog is coming back from hiatus! I always really enjoy your posts. I was wondering if you have any advice on engaging in a fandom that is mostly smut if you don’t read and write it? Most of the fans in my small fandom hang out in on discord together and mostly write E-rated fic. For various reasons I don’t read and write smut, and I’ve found it really difficult to make friends in the fandom. As a result, people very rarely comment on my fics even though I get lots of views and some kudos - it’s making fandom a bit lonely. On top of this, some of the BNFs have started ganging up in the comments on other people in the fandom over perceived slights in (actually very positive!) comments. I’m thus quite hesitant to even comment on the stuff I can read in case I accidentally offend them. But I do want to make some friends! I just don’t know how to do it. Thank you!
*hugs* that sounds like you've got a lot going on, anon! 💜 Let's start by separating this out into things you can't control versus things you can control.
You can't control:
the types of fics other people decide to write
how other people (Big Name Fans, in this case) will react to your comments
You can control:
whether or not you join, participate in, or leave the discord server
whose fics you comment on and how
how you write and post your own fics
You may be able to encourage:
whether other people decide to comment on your fic or not
Have you already tried the discord server? If not, maybe give it a go. Even if all of the authors solely write e-rated smut, that won't be the only topic of conversation. Plus, there are likely to be readers in there too, if it's open to anyone in the fandom. There will probably be channels related to writing, a channel for spoilers and speculation, a channel for fanart, one for recs, and one for general chitchat. At least, that's been the makeup of fandom servers I've been part of in the past.
As for the BNFs who are getting angry over comments, if you are worried about getting hit by that anger, then you don't have to comment on their fics. But a fandom is made up of many more people than just BNFs. Search out other writers, readers, artists etc. who are in a better frame of mind and comment on their works. Send them tumblr asks. Reblog their posts with tags or additions. A conversation has to start somewhere, and that's the first step towards making friends.
It's true that romantic fics tend to get more readership than gen fics in most fandoms, and getting more readers increases your likelihood of getting comments. However, you don't need to write E-rated smut if you don't want to. I'm someone who writes a lot of smut. However, I'm also someone who loves a good gen fic. I pretty much just want to see more of my favourite characters existing in a world together and whether that leads to shagging or shenanigans is up to the author.
If you want to encourage comments on your works and you're not sure how, I recommend checking out the @longlivefeedback Comment Project. It's a way for authors to make clear to readers what kind of feedback they like and whether or not they'll reply to comments (along with some other suggestions for how to start the conversation with your AN). LLF also has a Comment Builder to help readers who struggle with commenting. You can link that in your author's note as a resource, as well.
How have the rest of you found friends in your fandoms?
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lovedrruunk · 2 days
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'Mango Letters ♡⸝⸝💌⊹˖➴
Venture (Overwatch) x GN Reader
[Established Relationship!]
Authors note!!!; DID U MISS MEEE??? also...IM SO SORRYYY!!!! BUT I THINK IM JUST GONNA START WRITING WHAT I WANT :((( i realized im sososo bad with requests like genuinely ughhhh!! Ill def do some every now and then tho! Anyways im just clearing out my drafts cuz I’ve come to the realization that this is literally tumblr and my posts don’t have to be perfect lmao, enjoy!!
75 days 18 hours 46 minutes and 3 seconds. That's how long it had been since you've seen your partner Sloan. Being with them you knew how devoted they were to their work and how much it required them to travel but on pretty days like this one when the weathers just right and the flowers are in full bloom and the sunset is the perfect hue of orange, you couldn't help but wish they were by your side.
And although they were thousands of miles away they always made sure to send you physical manifestations of their love.
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Through love letters of course!!!
It had been a tradition ever since they had started going on longer expeditions for them to send you things in the mail. So there in your shared closet in a cute little shoebox on the top shelf, laid all their feelings on coffee stained papers. Little crystals the same color as your eyes, maps with all the places they wanted to take you, polaroids of them doing silly faces, and your favorite part, the sweet scent of mango that came with it all.
And so although they weren't by your side, their feelings were. Their longing, their excitement, their thoughts, all in the palm of your hands covered in all types stickers and doodles.
Sitting outside on the porch of your shared home enjoying the calm breeze you smile holding the most recent letter delivered. Inhaling deeply catching the hints of mango as you carefully open it.
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Dear Beloved,
It's been so looong!!! I can feel myself aging without you! Hope this letter finds you well! Notice how I used "beloved"? Fancy huh? Arn't I just the most romantic partner ever? (don't answer that.) This is my fifth time trying to write this and it's annoying the crew so this is my last chance before they jump me... It's just so hard y'know!? It has to be perfect. Perfect for you. Is that cringe? That was cringe sorry! I miss you lots and I think about you all the time... You'd love Petra! A camel ate my shemagh... but It's whatever. I'll buy a new one tomorrow, I'll get one for you too so don't worry! Now that I'm thinking about it the days seem to be going by pretty slow and I'm not sure if I like it much. Like I said I miss you a lot and it stinks being away from you for this long. Can't you just book a flight over here? Can't you do that for me pretty pleaseee? That's ridiculous? Okay just say you hate me and never want me to come back, just say you don't love me at all and want me to get stuck in a cave foreva. Just kidding! or am I?... (I am! >ᴗ<)
I like to imagine you’re missing me really bad counting down the seconds till I get back, which by the way I am too so don’t feel the need to deny it! I can see it now… You all shriveled up like a raisin crawling on the floor going “sloannn… sloannnn…” because of how bad you miss me hehe. Just kidding again! It’s probably the opposite let’s be real… I’m going insane without you seriously, I started talking to the hieroglyphics yesterday and the crew even caught me tasting some rocks earlier (sos!!!!)
But speaking of, they’re rushing me to “turn the lights off already” what a bunch of buzzkills ammarite? Promise to show up in my dreams okay? Who am I kidding, you’re always there regardless. Sweet dreams ᥫ᭡ᥫ᭡
p.s they really wanna meet you!
p.p.s take care okay? I’ll be home before you know it!!!
Yours truly,
(so romantic!!!)
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“(๑´>᎑<)~*”
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trashofspace · 3 months
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Updated! (2024-04-21)
Sup, welcome to my art blog. Username is trashofspace, but you may call me TOS.
About me:
She/her. And does English and Korean. And...yeah. I am korean.
I am an adult (20) ! I will not make NSFW content in this blog but if you are a minor and uncomfortable with me following you (I just follow back people who follow me without checking bio), then feel free to tell me :) I will unfollow you right away.
Multifandom but I think this blog would dedicated to BFDI-related stuff so yeah. Especially Pen or Tree. Cuz they are my best bois.
Art tags:
#TOShoomanizes for a humanized arts
#TOSobjects for a non-humanized arts
Request:
Closed for now!!!
I am lazy af and forget a lot. So it will take a bit longer. I mean, loooooooooog. If you are fine with it, then feel free to request it! I can do:
-general arts including ships (humanized and non-humanized. Plz let me know if you want a humanized one! If it is the character that I did not make a humanized version, it will take a lot more time...)
-mild gore (not organ-explosing things.)
-A little bit of adult joke things (?) If you know what I mean. Not explicit things.
Quality may vary so keep in mind! Sometimes I get too much enthusiastic that I might pour a soul in it lol
DNI:
If you are a Racist or some kind of weird person or stuff (like, shipper who ships adult×child), you are not allowed in this blog. And people who are under 13 years old are not allowed in this blog, either. Sorry.
Notice!:
You can have inspiration from my art, and you can draw my humanized designs too. (If you decided to draw my design, I would be glad if you could credit me!)
Also, I have noticed...a few bots following me, and it is getting on my nerves tbh. I will be cautious about it but I might block you if you are sus. So plz keep it in mind!
And that's it. Have fun at my blog and have a nice day :)
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inkskinned · 7 months
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it's just that there's a few more steps you have to take that other people don't have to take, but they don't see the steps, so they think you should be able to hop from moment to moment, a chickadee.
it isn't getting out of bed. it is the weight, the hook in your chest, the anchor. you have to move the anchor first. you have to silence your alarm, but your phone is in your hand, which means now you have to put the phone down, which is too-hard. you get stuck in there for a while, the white screen, mindlessly scrolling. you don't even like this activity, have tried a few other options but - here you are, and time is passing.
you've googled iron deficiency causes depression and if i drink enough water does it help with mental illness and anxiety but no caffiene within the last two weeks, like how you googled am i gay quiz at 17.
it isn't just calling the doctor back, it's the anxiety, it's these little moths in your lung cavities, furious and fluttering. you need to figure out how to capture your fingers from between their nervous bodies. you are an adult, you can say the words yes hi, i'm calling because i need - but you need to practice first. maybe write it down because what if you misspeak, wouldn't that be embarrassing. write it down, but you need to find a pen first. well, actually, your desk is kind of messy. you should get a new pen. you should get a new organizational system. you should try journaling.
your grades in school were always strange. the way teachers would say things like it feels like you're not trying. you could touch stars in the stuff you cared about. well, sometimes. god be willing. homework average zero. oops! your english teacher's wrinkled brow: i know you know this stuff. what the fuck are you doing?
it isn't the showering, it's the mirror before the shower and the soft horrible pull of your naked physique. you have to avoid eye contact completely or else it'll be 93 minutes later and you'll have picked at your skin until every little pore is bleeding. you have to stand up but standing is tiring and also you should have remembered to buy more soap but you never remember anything. maybe get out of the shower and while it's still running and you're still dripping wet, use your phone to take a note. make a note to get your groceries. let the shower run while you stand half-in half-out and get lost in your phone for a moment. come back out when the water runs cold and now you have to sprint to get ready.
your grandmother's frown. you're just being lazy. protestant work ethics in a house that isn't even protestant. she says she just learned different but she means learned better, doesn't she.
it's not that you can't send the email, it's that your hands have been hurting lately and the desk really is messy and also why the fuck would you even care about this thing? doesn't everyone else feel like they're drowning? hi brendon thanks so much for sending! will review and get back to you shortly. but now you're on the internet, close the tab with tumblr on it. go on, close it. feel the little soft vapor of boredom come up and over your eyeteeth and make everything overwhelming and itchy.
literally all you have to do is put on shoes to go outside. you're literally already dressed, that's the hard part of this whole thing. literally just put the shoes on. just... do it! do it! this shit is easy!
it's literally that easy. just stop taking all those stupid invisible steps. stop following your strange made-up rules. times like this, even you're positive you're faking. you just don't want to bother with the cleaning and the cooking and the being-an-adult.
but then - shouldn't you be able to put these stupid shoes on? nobody's even looking. go on kid. life is out there! just take the leap!
get moving.
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cherubfae · 3 months
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Omg hi! I'm a new follower and I just read your piece of the hazbin cast w/ reader having a panic attack and it was so sweet 🥺If possible could you maybe do the same cast of characters but with what they would do if the reader was on their period/period comfort?
Awww, thank you! yes!! Of course!! ☺️💘✨
taking care of you on your period || hazbin x reader
With Alastor, Lucifer, Charlie, Vaggie, Husk, Angel Dust, and Vox
tags: fluff, comfort, afab gn!reader, I decided to go with ftm for angel in this to try it out (lmk what you think!!) :3, periods in Hell are worse than on Earth I feel like that fits, suggestiveness in luci's || Minors don't interact!
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Alastor
"Oh, dear, why are you curled up on the floor in the fetal position? Are you hurt? I smell blood." Alastor coos in crackling static. He nods his head, listening to you explain despite you being facedown in said carpet. He'll procure a hot water bottle for your tummy, some aspirin, and some bitter, dark chocolate. He'll even go get one of those sugary iced coffees you love so much. Given the circumstances, Alastor may even allow you to touch his ears, but his mindful of his antlers if you know what's good for you.
Lucifer
Oh no, his poor sweetheart! The King of Hell goes full Mama Goose mode (you can see where Charlie gets it from) and hunts down whatever he thinks you may need. He'll create a little nest fort for you, spooning you from behind and nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck. He's also not opposed of other ways of relief. In Lucifer's own wise words, "Bow-chick-a-wow-wow." (As long as you're up for it, he's not opposed to giving Charlie a sibling.)
Charlie
She's on it instantaneously! Running around scavaging all sorts of items from tampons to pads to candies-- she's not sure of your preferences, so she gets all of them! Only the best for her sweetie pie!! Huddles extraaaa close to you in your shared blanket cocoon, feeding you chocolates and giving you sweet nuzzles.
Vaggie
Immediately sends you off for a hot bath while she changes and washes the sheets so that they're nice, warm, and fresh. She also will prepare your favorite pajamas and snacks, digging through some films for one to watch. Vaggie will do what she can to make sure you're well-rested, hydrated, and most importantly; comfortable.
Husk
Immediately goes to the women of the hotel and asks about what sort of toiletries the hotel has to offer. He's discreet about your situation and grateful for their help. He wants you to feel better as soon as possible even if that means your symptoms haven't fully gone away yet! The scent of blood is strong on you and if he can notice you from a mile away, he's certain others have too. So, he creates a little nest for you two, the bar is closed down for the day, and cuddles you close to his chest.
Angel Dust
He'll spoon you from behind, resting his warm hand on your tummy. From what Cherri has told him, this shit's worse than when you guys were alive. Hell really does have a hard-on for torturing people. Angel will be as vigilant as he can, getting you whatever you may need, reassuring you gently that just because you have your period doesn't change who you are as a person nor how you idenitify. You're you, no matter what your body does or doesn't do.
Vox
|| I DON'T GIVE PERMISSION FOR MY WORKS TO BE REPOSTED, RESHARED, OR EDITED. TUMBLR IS MY ONLY ACCOUNT AND THE ONLY PLACE WHERE I POST MY WRITING. ALL CHARACTERS BELONG TO THEIR RIGHTFUL OWNERS, THE STORY BELONGS TO ME. || CHERUBFAE © 2024
What's that? Oh, shit, that's when you-- yeah? Oh, okay got it. That sounds like that sucks. Yeah, he doesn't mind grabbing some things for you but he's a bit stiff when it comes to comfort. He knows what it is for sure and he'll do his best. Velvette might tear him a new asshole. He does genuinely want you to feel better, he doesn't like seeing you in pain. He's just a little lost.
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catgirl-kaiju · 3 months
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something worth pointing out in the case of Tumblr CEO @photomatt 's statement regarding predstrogen is the very clear side stepping of the conversation being had. the ask he chose to respond to as part of his statement was asking about tumblr's transmisogyny problem, and what he is commenting on is tumblr's transphobia problem.
transmisogyny is certainly related to transphobia, but the two are not the same. i've seen plenty of trans folks who are guilty of transmisogyny and have even been harassed by such individuals on this very website. he repeatedly refers to transphobia and accusations of tumblr staff being transphobes throughout the statement, but never once brings up transmisogyny. perhaps he is unfamiliar with the term, but he could look it up and read up on it before responding to a question directly asking about it. he is very clearly not doing his due diligence in addressing these concerns.
he mentions tumblr having "LGBT+ including trans people on staff," but this is not especially helpful in assessing tumblr's transmisogyny problem. based on this we don't know how many trans people, whether or not there any transfem or TMA folks (who might understand the nature of transmisogyny better than TME people) on staff, what positions these queer people hold in the company, or whether or not any of tumblr's queer employees are on the moderation team. and it's understandable why some of these specifics are left out; you don't want to put any staff members in danger of being doxxed or harassed, especially if they're vulnerable marginalized people. however, it seems to me a gross oversight to not mention if there are any trans folks working on the moderation team.
i think it's also a huge misstep to focus on predstrogen so singularly when the conversation about her account being nuked is part of a larger conversation about transmisogyny. what this reveals, too, is transmisogyny playing an active role in the decision to ban her for life. one of the aspects of transmisogyny is viewing transfem folks as especially and uniquely dangerous. i'd like @photomatt to ask himself if he would have taken "threats" like the one cited as seriously if they came from a cis person or a TME trans person. really reflect on that, Matt. i also put "threat" in scare quotes here because, frankly, it's pretty clear that said comment is a cartoonish and outlandish example of violence used to demonstrate that the intent to harm is not literal. i do this all the time both on here and in real life. telling a friend i'm going to "maul them to death" over a minor annoyance is a comedic way of expressing frustration in a way that communicates it's not actually a big deal. saying something like "i want them to explode after falling down the stairs when trying to evade a falling piano full of knives" about a public figure or someone who is negatively affecting your life works as a way of demonstrating the intensity of your feelings while not veering into territory where it sounds like you're literally planning an assassination attempt. if you're reading this, Matt, i hope you can begin to understand the difference between something like:
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and a real actual harassment, like:
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y'know, all actual comments and posts i've received on this website, and reported with detailed explanations for why i'm reporting them but never heard back from the moderation team about the situation. i have no idea if anything was ever done about any of these people sending me bigoted violent messages because no one ever does follow-up. the only time i've ever received follow-up on a report was when i reported an account for promoting self-harm in the form of anorexia. that's it. one time in the over a decade i've been on this website.
how does all of this sit with you, Matt?
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ms-demeanor · 6 months
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i’m curious what your opinion is on the finer points of the case mentioned in the JSTOR post you reblogged earlier. the two sources in the post say that JSTOR didn’t press charges against him and had already settled with him by the time he killed himself. from what i read on wikipedia, the concern seems to be that JSTOR complied with a subpoena, which i don’t believe they have a choice to ignore? if anything it seems like the us government had reason to want him dead for wikileaks and public court records reasons, so they took a terms of use violation and blew it up into a dozen federal crimes.
is there more context i should be aware of? i have no particular affection or malice for JSTOR but the sources i found don’t exactly implicate the database or its employees in murder.
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That's from page 175 of this document. This line: "The activity noted is outright theft and may merit a call with university counsel, and even the local police, to ensure not only that the activity has stopped but that - e.g. the visiting scholar who left - isn't leaving with a hard drive containing our database" is where I think the culpability starts.
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If someone is downloading 1000s of articles (what seems like reasonable threshold for us to take action), what's wrong with us - or the university in collaboration with us - alerting the cyber-crimes division of law enforcement and initiating an investigation, having cop search dorm room and try to retrieve any hard drive that contains our content, etc. Our content is extraordinarily valuable and hard to replicate by the sweat of one's brow, but can be duplicated by savvy hackers and who knows what they want to do with the content?
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Page 379: "Does the university contact law enforcement? Would they be willing to do so in this instance?
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From page 1296:
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I think the important thing to note here is that JSTOR had worked with MIT and had plans in place to prevent future similar downloads, but remained focused on identifying the person responsible for the downloads and ensuring that their data was deleted.
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"I might just be irked because I am up dealing with this person on a Sunday night, but I am starting to feel like they need to get a hold of this situation right away or we need to offer to send them some help (read FBI).
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And there it is. Page 3093 of the document.
JSTOR can hem and haw about it all they want, but you can't un-call the cops.
MIT was working with JSTOR on preventing future incidents of pirating, but JSTOR repeatedly said that they weren't going to let it go, that it was unacceptable to drop the issue, that they were going to continue to pursue the pirate.
You can scroll through the document and see the JSTOR tech department and abuse team talking about Swartz as a script kiddie, and a hacker. You can see someone talking about how this was real theft - making the comparison to stealing books even while admitting that piracy doesn't close others out of access.
You can see the thread starts with a joke about punching someone in the face for hacking their system, and includes the tech team ominously considering whether they should threaten the MIT librarians with the FBI.
There's something really important to note here which I don't think that people who aren't PRETTY DEEP into hackery shit aren't aware of: US law enforcement is absolutely rabidly feral about prosecuting hackers. People may be more aware of this now because of Chelsea Manning and Edward Snowden (and perhaps a bit on tumblr because of maia arson crimew), but people who work in tech and who are in infosec - like the people joking about calling the FBI in these emails - would be aware of the bonkers disproportionate punishments faced by hackers. And knowing that, they kept pushing and pushing and pushing for identification of the hacker. They kept digging with MIT, they kept saying that simply preventing future incidents wasn't enough.
Early in the exchange someone from JSTOR asked "what's wrong with us - or the university in collaboration with us - alerting the cyber-crimes division of law enforcement and initiating an investigation, having cop search dorm room and try to retrieve any hard drive that contains our content, etc." and the answer is what happened to Aaron Swartz.
It is absolute bullshit for JSTOR to say "we arrived at a solution privately and didn't want to press charges" after law enforcement has gotten involved with a hacking case, especially one where they're talking about "real theft" and are attempting to quantify and emphasize the amount that was "stolen" from them.
The *public* may believe that private individuals or institutions are the ones who "press charges" but that's simply not the case. It's prosecutors who decide whether or not to go ahead with charges; they do it based on what cases they think they can win and what their office's perspective is on the crime. When you hear about people choosing to press charges it simply means that they decided to tell the prosecutor they wanted the case to go forward. It's up to the prosecutor whether or not that happens.
And the tech team at JSTOR had to know that law enforcement wasn't just going to wag a finger at an academic hacker.
There's a parallel here that happens sometimes when people have their identities stolen by their parents. If you mom takes out a credit card in your name, that's identity theft. That's fraud. That's illegal. If you reach the age of 25 and realize that your credit is ruined because your mom has been defaulting on cards in your name, you've got two choices to fix that: one is to accept the debt and pay it off and build up credit, and the other is to report the identity theft - which will end up with your mom in prison for a decade or so. Ruin your own personal finances, or your mom goes to jail for ruining your finances. So if you find out that your mom stole your identity you can't just call the cops to pressure her into transferring the debt to her name or something. That's not an option. The cops are not a threat to wave over people, they are not a way to get people to fall in line or act right. They aren't someone you can send to a college student's dorm room to retrieve a hard drive and have the matter drop.
When you call the cops on someone you are sending the full force of the law after them, and the full force of the law falls really heavily on hackers, and how heavy that blow can be is something that the JSTOR team must have been aware of when they were making snide comments about calling the FBI because they were frustrated with the noncommittal responses they were getting from librarians.
Ultimately it was the carceral state that killed Aaron Swartz, but they would not have been involved if JSTOR didn't think that what he did constituted theft.
Taking an *EVEN LARGER* step back from that, the idea that information can be owned and locked behind a paywall is what killed Aaron Swartz, someone who fought for information to be free.
Like. JSTOR is a licensing company. At the end of the day, cute social media posts and all, they're the same as the RIAA and ASCAB. They exist to extract a fee from people attempting to access information.
Aaron Swartz and all that he stood for are an existential threat to their core function.
Are JSTOR's hands as dirty as the federal prosecutors? Absolutely not. But they operate on a model that puts them in opposition to open information activists and it ended up with a hammer falling on Aaron Swartz that they dropped.
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luvvyouforever · 2 months
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harvey (sdv) - nsfw alphabet <3
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-> there is not nearly enough harvey content on tumblr for my liking. SO two harvey posts in a row, yes i do believe. and i do love reading an sfw/nsfw alphabet so of course i have to provide for our favorite nerdy doctor <3 i also want you to know that as i write this, i imagine harvey as a taller, bigger man. so like he's got some chub on him and he's got broad shoulders. idk idk it's my headcanon.
-> this is nsfw and dirty! like i really tried to get over my reservations about using descriptive language. with that being said, NSFW 18+ MDNI MDNI MDNI MDNI MDNI MDNI MDNI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
harvey is the sweetest, most gentlemanly partner after sex. he makes sure that you get cleaned up, that you protect yourself against any UTIs or other gross things, makes you some coffee or tea, and cuddles with you endlessly. harvey would need some extra reassurance that what he did was good, that you enjoyed it, or that you didn't get hurt. he'd get anxious and worry about it for the rest of the night if you didn't offer him some kind of honest discussion.
b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
i think he appreciates his arms and hands! he knows that he has some strength and likes when you can grip on to his biceps in the heat of the moment. knows how to work his hands i mean, come on. he can do minor surgical interventions. if you hold onto his arm while you're walking in town, he'd get all blushy.
as for you, he truthfully loves every part of you. if you ever asked him "what part of me is your favorite?" he would actually stress over it and couldn't answer. however, if you really really wanted him to say, he would choose your eyes. there's nothing better to him than looking at them when he's giving you pleasure. sends him reeling, actually.
c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
i don't think harvey is particularly keen on making a mess, especially of the bed or another surface. he'd try to keep his cum inside of you, or at least contained to an easily wipeable surface (like your face). on the down low though, i truthfully think he'd surprisingly enjoy cumming on your face, mainly around your lips. messy oral? he's done for.
d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
meeting dr. harvey in his office for a confidential check-up? hmm. definitely not when you first start dating, but give him some time and you may just find yourself on his desk (never in the actual, sterile field) receiving a little extra attention wink wink nudge nudge
e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
he has plenty of knowledge about anatomy, trust me. he never struggles with finding your best spots. however, he struggles with foreplay and building intimacy and dirty talk, etc. he's a nerd! what can i say? tell him what you like, guide him, and help him and he'd be confident in no time. he's a quick learner.
f = favorite position (this goes without saying)
so, i think there are two sides to harvey. he is either incredible slow, passionate, and earnest. this lends itself to something simple like missionary where he can stare into your eyes, kiss you, tell you sweet things, etc. his other side comes out later, when he's gotten more comfortable with you and with himself, and he can get a little rougher or faster or intense. he likes to be able to grip on to you so something like doggy, maybe riding?
g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
harvey can't help but be clumsy sometimes. he learns to be able to giggle at himself when his hand misses the bed and he falls. he also can't help but giggle when hair gets caught in your mouth or some other silly thing. however, he likes to keep things intimate and prefers to have a serious moment with you in bed.
h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
i don't think he fully shaves, he just doesn't strike me as that kinda guy with his mustache. but i do think he trims it, kinda manscapes it a little bit to tame everything down but he likes to have a little hair down there.
i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
loves making sex romantic. he doesn't do it often, but on special days like your anniversary or birthday, he will harvest some flowers from the farm and throw the petals around the room, open up some freshly made wine, and showers you in affection. as for every day sex, he still likes to make it special for you and never backs down on his pure, teeth-hurting sweetness.
j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)
i think that he is the kinda guy that starts feeling guilty for masturbating after he gets into a relationship. prefers to just wait for you. however, before your relationship, he would masturbate every once in a while when he was stressed or horny. if he ever watched porn, which i feel like would be very rare for him, he wouldn't watch highly produced, fake porn. it would have to be something amateur. (harvey has a secret twitter account)
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
okay so...i think harvey starts out vanilla. when you're getting to know him and for the first few times you have sex, he keeps it simple. mainly out of nervousness. however, i think he's kinkier than we might assume. i think he really enjoys being praised and praising you. i think, too, he likes feeling big and strong in that he gives in to his possessiveness sometimes, and he likes being able to manhandle you a little bit. also, i propose this everyone....bondage? nothing super strong! just with his tie or belt. and your hands. to the headboard.
l = location (favorite places to do the do)
your bedroom, mostly! he has a reputation that he needs to uphold so anything in public is nerve wracking. but with some convincing, like i said, his fancy office is not totally off limits.
m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
seeing you do anything! especially if you're really determined to get something done and you're working hard at it! like, you've been working so damn hard on renovating and cleaning the farm and you come back proud of everything you've done, he will look at you with a glow in his face. kisses on the neck, too!
n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
i don't think he'd ever hurt you. it's just not something he could ever see himself doing. he doesn't mind seeing like fingertip marks on you the day after but anything like choking, spanking, etc is out of the question. he also would find rudeness a turn off in a person. like he would hate to see anyone be rude to another person and it would take away from someone's attractiveness immediately! (that's not to say that he doesn't enjoy some town gossip here and there)
o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
my first headcanon here is that harvey LOVES giving oral and on the days when he hasn't cleanly shaved his face, his stubble leaves marks around your thighs. okay, now that that's out of the way: harvey is such a pleaser and he'd do anything to make sure you feel good. he likes when you guide his head, mouth, or hands and he likes being told if you want more, or faster, or less. as for him receiving, i think he enjoys it but he gets so in his head that he can't really cum from it. it takes some extra praise and reassurance to get him to fully open up.
p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
like every other answer here, it depends on his mood! he can get really fast when he's feeling extra needy or kinky. however, when he's trying to be romantic, he will take his sweet time and go nice and slow with his thrusts, movements, touches. however, i think he could also use slowness to his advantage and tease you.
q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
prefers to take his time but sometimes he likes to catch you before you wake up and start working on the farm and before he has to go to work. he enjoys these more than he will admit to himself though and he thinks it can be fun!!
r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
he's down to try new things, don't get me wrong! if you wanna try something new, he'll let you to an extent but he won't do anything that comes with a dangerous outcome or health risk! like, sure, he might be down to try some new rope positions but he won't dare put chocolate sauce around his genitals. do you know the bacteria risks that can come with that??
s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
i don't think he has very high stamina. it's not that he gets really sleepy after, but he can't go for multiple rounds. maybe two if it's been a long time since he's seen you. he can last a while though, i think. he won't cum the minute he engages in anything and with his anxiety, it may even take him a while to get to that point.
t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
he doesn't mind bringing out a vibrator because he knows how good it could make you feel. he doesn't like them on himself though! he doesn't mind taking a trip out to zuzu and hitting up a sex shop to buy some new bondage-y toys. they will be thoroughly cleaned though. why would nipple clamps be any less clean than forceps?
u = unfair (how much they like to tease)
he doesn't do it with malice in his heart, trust me. he just likes seeing you on edge, waiting for him of all people, begging for more pleasure. he experiments to see how long you can go for, or how far he can drag out oral. he definitely enjoys it more than he'd let on. oh, and, i leave you with this, imagine harvey offering fake pity and cooing at you:
"my poor flower...you must want it so bad!"
v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
keeps quiet, mostly. some interjections of grunts and groans, especially when he cums. he uses his voice more for sweet talk! he loves hearing your noises, though, and it gives him more encouragement than anything.
w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
the first time you called him dr. harvey in a joking, yet somewhat flirtatious manner, he blushed and got incredibly flustered. then, you did it again, and it had the same effect. and then...oh lord. your hands were roaming his body and you, just testing the waters, called him dr. harvey and he could have finished right there.
x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
he's big guys, i'm sorry. nerdy white men are always packing. i headcanon him as a big boy and it's only fitting that he's proportionate. more thickness than length. he was a little ashamed the first time you had sex but he realized just how good it feels and it makes him proud. big dick energy if you will.
y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
i think he has a fluctuating sex drive. during flu and cold season, he is so stressed and likes to come back and make dinner, cuddle, and go to bed. however, during the summer, when everyone is healthy and only needs some aloe vera gel for sunburns, he could go day after day with you. it just all depends on his mood and the time of the year.
z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
he enjoys cuddling and talking after sex but give him an hour and the man is CONKED. he's the older bachelor so of course he's a sleepy man. cuddle up to his chest, open up the window to let fresh air or the sounds of rain float in, and he'll be like a baby.
823 notes · View notes
plmp0 · 2 months
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What are u looking at?
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Summary: You can't help but stare at ur boss's Jay's arms whenever u r in his office, having enough from acting like nothing happened Jay made sure to use them for ur own good.
A.N: the spacing might seem weird because i didn't write in tumblr so sorry for that and for any typos i don't have time now to edit this so i'll do that later ^^
Warnings: ceo!jay x secretary!reader, hard!dom!jay, sub reader, names calling, choking, p in v, cream pie, fingering, oral (both f and m), messy!sex, unprotected (cause it's a fic) and more
Your friend has been begging u to take her place at work since she is pregnant and doesn't trust someone else to do her job while taking it seriously, u've been kindly denying her offer not really wanting to take a responsibility as big as her work, knowing exactly how big and successful her company is but as u got kicked out from ur current job having to pay ur bills for the month u had no choice but to agree. It was ur "first day" at work, ur friend insisted to come with u today so u'd feel less awkward and also to talk about u with her "boss".
"Y/n don't be nervous relax a little bit" ur friend whispered looking at ur pale face and ur shaky hands, "ohh yeah" u let a breath out as u were now in front of the office, ur friend going first and then calling for u, u closed the door closing ur eyes slightly to calm urself down a little bit before turning and saying an awkward hi not daring to look at the person sitting on the chair in front of u, only hearing his voice telling u to take a seat.
U sat in front of ur friend, her cute smiling face taking some of ur anxiety away as she sends u signal to say something, u turned ur heard finally getting a look at Mr Park who's been staring at u in amusement waiting for u to say something with his raised brow "u-umm, nice to meet u" u said biting ur lips cursing urself for the words that ur mouth chose to let out and u r thankful that ur friend is with u trying to soften the atmosphere as well as speaking on ur behalf.
Mr Park as u call him said that u could start work tomorrow giving u some files to help u understand the structure of their work more before coming, and u couldn't help it but be intimidated by his presence, sensing his eyes on u all the time not just staring but piercing through your soul as if he's trying to find ur weakness.
U couldn't sleep the whole night, feeling so scared of being alone without ur friend in that big company, u washed ur face applying some neutral makeup and picking ur hair up in ponytail, scanning ur wardrobe to find something professional and deciding on a black pencil skirt with a white blouse not forgetting to wear ur long coat not feeling that comfortable in these clothes but u couldn't find something more suitable.
U sighed knocking on the door after u received a call from Jay telling u to bring him some coffee along with some papers he wanted from the finance team, u tried to steady urself while opening the door careful to not drop the cup and relaxing after u succeed, u cleared ur throat sensing Jay's eyes on u as u presented the coffee to him who is busy scanning ur choice of clothes not saying anything and just gesturing to a chair asking u to sit and tell him about ur opinion on some matters making u disappear inside ur clothes as u didn't read the papers before bringing them, Jay sighed on the other end massaging his forehead before sipping his coffee, his hands rolling up his sleeves making u shift ur attention to his veins and forearms, his muscles contracting when he moves his hand back to his desk and his biceps making ur mouth dry at the sight and he probably noticed that as u heard him chuckle, "are you done staring?" his deep voice snapped u out of ur thoughts making ur face even hotter if possible, and if u said that u wish u were dead in that moment u wont be lying
"i'm sorry Mr. Park i was-" his voice stopped u only letting a "Jay" making u look at him questionably "huh?" u blinked a couple of times not really understanding what he meant "you can call me Jay not mr.Park" he said again "and yes i can see how distracted you are" he added his eyes scanning ur figure , "it's my first day here i promise i won't be that distracted again, please don't fire me" u blurred out of nowhere making him chuckle and shake his head in amusement, "i won't fire you y/n" he said as he stands up and walks to stand behind u, his scent and warmth making u close ur eyes in embarrassment, "i'm sorry" you said again trying to stand up but his hand on your shoulder made u stay put "it's ok but u better stay focused or i'll have to punish you" his warm breath in ur ear made a shiver run down your spine, "w-what??" you stuttered your brain trying to process his words and failing, his husky laugh brought u back from ur thoughts, "i'm kidding y/n relax, now go and read the files i sent u, i'll need u to schedule some things because i have a meeting abroad next month" u noded a little bit, sneacking out of his office not noticing his dark eyes following your every movement and the smirk he wore on his lips, 'cute'
It was Friday already and u swear work has never been exhausting before, everything came at u at the same time, having to learn new stuff while doing the work that has been given to u and let's not forget about Jay and his non ending teasing, for some reasons u didn't expect him to be relaxed and strict at the same time, always making u confused, sometimes he is nice and gives u advices on the matters he needs your help with and then he is rude and tells you that you're doing everything wrong, not letting you breathe even once and then comes his "nice comments" whether it's about ur hair or what u r wearing, not forgetting to roll up his sleeves whenever u come to his office, the whole situation making you blush more and more each day and him being so close to u all the time not helping one bit, u'd find urself lost in ur thoughts imagining him doing the dirtiest thing to you most of the times before he snaps u from ur thoughts.
Today u were supposed to have a meeting with an investor, agreeing to have it in one of the cafe's near the company after Jay's orders, u checked out ur bag making sure to not forget anything before stepping in the cafe, scanning the place looking for the person and noticing a guy dressed in a suit sitting alone, assuming that's the guy you're looking for, you walked to his table greeting him and shaking his hand, he had his hair slicked back with a charming smile on his lips as he looks at u, his gaze scanning ur body and stopping on ur breasts, he didn't bother to hide his lust for you making you uncomfortable as he is still checking you out, "let's order first" u said trying to ignore his stares as u r looking at ur phone regretting not coming with Jay.
"I have no idea why they send me someone who's so pretty" he said leaning on the table and licking his lips, "let's start shall we" you said clearing your throat and giving him a polite smile, "i have a question tho" he said leaning closer and as u were about to shake him away from u, u met with Jay's back as he sits in front of you, making the guy go back to his place, his brows furrowed as he glares at the man in front of him, "i hope that i wasn't interrupting something important, y/n" he said looking straight at the guy in front of him making him gulp, the silence afterwards lasted more than it should before Jay broke it "Mr Sim sorry for coming late but can we start? i have some other work to do so i hope we can finish this fastly" he said frowning his tone stricter than usual, his stare making the guy's hand tremble as he nods, his eyes never leaving Jay's figure as the older takes out the documents and starts explaining them.
"Okay i think it'd better if we discuss these things with the finance team (lmao what's with me and finance) we are gonna be waiting for u next week" Jay said looking at the man in front of him killing him with his eyes this whole time, especially after making a move on u in front of him,you were so uncomfortable to say the least wishing for this meeting to end as quickly as possible, Jay shifted his eyes on u his gaze softening a bit, "Y/n u can go i'll follow after a minute" u noded your eyes never looking back as u were heading out, u didn't notice Jay's glare getting even worse and his fist clenching the pen tightly, making the man in front of him tremble, "Mr Sim i didn't want so say anything in front of miss Y/n, but i'd appreciate it if u keep ur eyes for urself, u r old enough to know how to be professional and i hope that what happened today wouldn't happen again or m not sure i'd tolerate that kind of behavior, now excuse me" He left shooting draggers at the man , he sighed his veins popping he barely managed to contain himself earlier, he took a few deep breaths and went back to the company noting ur bored expressions as he reached his floor seeing u checking your phone, the sight making him relax and smile a little bit, he walked towards you throwing u a soft smile before signaling u to follow him to his office and u did.
U were standing in front of him eyes scanning his loose tie his body relaxing on his chair as he massaged his neck exposing his collarbones as his forarms flexes, u were almost drooling cheeks heating up at the sinful thoughts going on ur mind right now, not paying attention to the man in front of u neither for what he is saying, "you're not listening" his deep voice snapped u out of ur thoughts making your body shake a bit, u opened ur mouth to answer him but no words came out making him chuckle, "are u alright there, princess?" He grined now adjusting his propotions in his seat as he ordered u to sit, u cleared ur throat softly ur mouth feeling dry trying ur best now to ignore his arms and the veins decorating them as u listen to him "i want u to know that u don't have to put up with that kind of behavior as u did earlier and-" Jay'd words stopped as he noticed the way ur paying him no attention staring shamelessly at his arms mouth a gape he tusked before walking to the door locking it making u look at him with a questioning look, he turned his back to you and started loosening his tie making sure to give you a show, his biceps contracting as he pulled the material down his throat "i've been really trying to ignore the way u react whenever i do this" he said referring to his loose tie and his rolled up sleeves, "but u just keep staring at me in a way that makes it harder for me to control myself"
His steps are slow and calculated, his eyes dark and predatory, "u think i don't know, princess?" his voice softened at the last word "just how dumb u become whenever i touch you even a little, how hard it is for u to not make a sound" his deep voice made ur stomach turn and u can feel his breath on ur skin now, his choice of words ringing in ur ears making ur shoulders drop;
"or do u really think that i'm oblivious to all the dirty things you're thinking about when you're near me" his eyes darkened more his lips brushing ur earlobe now his scent intoxicating you, and u r trembling the wetness between ur thighs increasing by each second, Jay chuckled his hand cupping ur face lifting ur chin so that ur eyes meet his, "i-i don't know what u m-mean Mr Park?" You whispered your cheeks getting redder and redder, "oh really?" he answered his lips ghosting ur jawline making u whimper, his other hand now on ur waist squeezing it lightly before sliding down on your thighs, his touch burning ur skin, his fingers started playing with the hem of ur skirt, his teeth grazing your earlobe before whispering, "i think you know very well what m talking about" his hand slipped under ur skirt his thumb rubbing ur clothed cunt making u whimper and squeeze your legs together, "look at you so desperate and needy" he teased his finger slowly moving your panties to the side and pressing his middle finger in your folds making you moan, Jay tusked at the sound pulling his hand out and turning around his back facing you, "i-im sorry" u whispered making him sigh and sit down, "sorry won't make you less of a needy little whore" his voice deep and dangerous, the words sending shivers down your spine, "what am i gonna do with you" he sighed his head resting on his palm, his eyes dark and lustful and u were too lost in his gaze, your cheeks red, hearing these words from him affecting u more than u'd think, your legs alreadt shaky, he was scanning ur form, the sight making his pants tighten and his jaw clench, his hands gripping his thigh to control himself.
"Get here and on your knees" his words made u blink, your heart beats increasing and your pussy throbbing, you hesitated for a minute before getting up, your needeness kicking out any logical thought of ur brain your knees hitting the ground in front of him, your face now on the same level with his crotch, Jay smirked his hands reaching for his belt buckle, undoing the strap and the sight alone made u moan pulling his pants down enough for his cock to spring out, his member twitching and pulsing in front of you, Jay gripped your chin in his large hand making you look at him, his fingers pressing into your cheeks dark eyes scaning ur fucked out face and his lips pulled into a tight line, his eyes never leaving yours as he slapped his cock on ur face before pushing his length down your throat, his hands tangled in your hair, nails digging into your scalp, and your moans and gags only fueling his ego more, letting his groans fill the office, his hips kept moving against your mouth in a very harsh but delicious pace "u've waiting for this ha? for me to fuck your pretty face" he groaned his hands forcing you to take his full length, your eyes brimming with tears and you were sure that by now ur makeup was ruined, the sight of the wrecked mess you were made Jay groan and grip the armrest, his eyes closed and his head thrown back as he enjoys the warmness of ur mouth "fuck u r so good at this, such a good girl" the words made ur cunt throb and clench on nothing, u needed to be touched but the position u were in didn't let u rub ur thighs together and the lack of friction was driving u crazy.
Jay noticed that, he noticed ur pathetic attempts and he guided his left foot between ur legs his expensive shoe spreading u a little bit before rubbing your clothed cunt, the pressure wasn't enough and the fact that it was his shoe that was rubbing you, made ur mind go blank, ur eyes closing and a moan leaving your mouth making him groan at the vibration as you grinded on his leg, "i never thought you'd be this much of a needy slut, grinding on my leg like a bitch in heat, god you r so pathetic" his degrading words made u clench on nothing, the shoe still rubbing your cunt and Jay's hold on ur hair got tighter at ur desperate state, your head bobbing on his length eyes tearing up as u stared him up seeing the way his jaw clenches and his veins popped, his eyes never leaving yours, hands guiding u up and down his shaft, the lack of oxygen and his dick down ur throat made your vision go blurry and the wet sounds of ur pussy being rubbed by his expensive shoe was making u go insane,
Jay growled his hands pushing u to take more of him making u roll ur eyes tapping gentelly on his thighs when it was too much, the tears in ur eyes streaming down your cheeks now the mascara smeared all over your face, your pussy clenching when his tip hits the back of ur throat, "shit, y/n" he groaned, the knot in his stomach building up his thrusts getting sloppier, his foot now pressing harder on ur cunt before spilling his hot seeds down ur throat, the taste of him and the smell of his cologne making u come on his shoes almost instantly, "fuck" he breathed his forehead resting on the back of his hand, he moved his foot away tusking at the slick stuck on them "look at you making such a mess, and on my shoe nonetheless" he chuckled shaking his head, the sight of u making him want to bend you over and fuck u hard and rough, his eyes now on your fucked out face and the way u were staring at his cock, some of his cum painting ur chin ur blouse sticky from ur drool mixed with his cum, his hand still in ur hair making sure u can't move "don't u dare" he warned, his tone deep and strict making u stop in your tracks and stare at him.
U gulped waiting for his next move just to see him lean down, his fingers unbottoning ur white blouse, his tongue licking his bottom lip as he sees your lace bra as well as your cleavage, u felt his warm hands on ur breasts kneading them making you moan, his hands slipping inside the bra and squeezing them, his thumb now teasing your nipples and rubbing them while his other hand grabbed ur face making you look at him, "u have no idea how many times i've imagined this" his voice coming out raspy as his thumb rubs ur bottom lip, hands going down to pull ur arms back taking his belt and using it to restrain them behind ur back, "i can't wait to have a taste of that tight little cunt of yours" his fingers walked past ur skirt lifting it up enough to get a sight of ur soaked panties, and his eyes darkened at the sight, his tongue wetting his lips, he stepped back admiring the mess in front of him, the way your legs are shaking thighs pressed together, the way your hair is a mess and the way your arms are tied behind ur back your shirt unbuttoned with ur breasts spilling out of your bra, he wanted to eat u alive.
He walked to the desk leaning his elbows on the edge as his eyes pierced through yours, his hands undoing his tie, the sound of his footsteps as he walks back towards you feeling his expenssive cologne hit ur nostrils and driving u crazy, u felt his warm hands on your neck as he put the tie around it and pulls it, the pressure making you gasp, "you're not allowed to make a noise, remember we r in an office after all" he said as his thumb caressed your cheeks, his hand now sliding down your arm and stopping on the hem of your skirt, he lifted it up again his fingers ghosting your wet panties and your legs tremble, your head falls on his chest as he moves his finger along your folds, his other hand massaging your breast, and the soft noises coming from your mouth went straight to his cock, the way your body reacted to his touches made him grin;
"someone's enjoying this huh" he teased reaching to lift his tie positioning it between ur lips before giving you a wink, his fingers now pressing against your clothed entrance, your eyes closed droppibg ur head back your mind going blank, "fuck" you mumbled the feeling of his finger rubbing your clit and his lips on your neck are overwhelming, Jay tusked at ur reaction and his grip on the tie got tighter his fingers rubbing ur clothed pussy in a painfully slow pace, and the sounds that ur muffled moans were making were music to his ears, his finger moved aside ur panties entering your cunt, the tightness and the warmth of you made him groan, his finger struggling to move inside of you, teeth grazing your skin, thumb pressing against ur clit and the knot in ur stomach tightened, his finger went deeper inside you making u curse, his lips now on your shoulder biting gently, he added another finger stretching u out while his thumb's still rubbing your clit, the way his fingers hit that spot inside of u made your knees weak, your muffled moans and gasps only encouraging him to go faster, his teeth nibbling ur collarbones lips kissing their way up to your neck and then to ur jaw.
"fuck princess u r so fucking tight" his fingers went rougher and deeper, his other hand squeezing your breast rubbing your nipples, his lips brushed against your cheek eyes watching you as he curled his fingers making ur eyes roll back and a loud moan escaped your lips, Jay clicked his tongue in disapproval his hands stopping their movements as he looks at u, his eyes dark his lips forming a pout, he reached for the tie moving it down to rest on ur neck, "looks like this tie isn't enough to silence you y/n?" He asked, the question making u moan in humiliation, his eyes piercing through u as he let a chuckle escape his lips, his fingers still knuckle deep in you, he moved to your ear as he whispered, "do i have to gag you or do u think that you'll be able to stay quiet without a gag?" He teased his tongue licking the shell of ur ear, his words only making ur pussy clench around him, "answer me" he let out his breath hitting ur skin, his deep voice sending shivers down ur spine, "I-I'll be q-quiet" you managed to let out, and as if that was the answer he was waiting for, he pulled his fingers out of you making u whimper, "behave and i might give you a reward" he moved his eyebrows walking to the chair and sitting down, his fingers still shiny from your slick, you wanted nothing but to taste yourself on his fingers and suck him dry, your thighs are still trembling and your eyes never left his frame, his cock rock hard tip leaking with precum, his arms flexed as he rested them on his knees,
"come here" his command was clear and sharp making you obey instantly, your legs struggling to keep u up the feeling of the slick going down ur thighs making u even more needy, Jay grinned as u stopped in front of him hands behind ur back, he stood up towering over you, his chest almost pressing on yours as he leans to your ear, his hand going up and down your thighs, his nose nuzzling the side of your neck, "such a good girl" his words shoot right into ur core followed by his kisses trailing from ur neck to your cleavage, his large hands lifting you up and placing you on the desk, the papers flying off the surface and the cold air on ur skin made u shiver, his fingers played with the straps of ur skirt, "lift your ass" he ordered and u did, his fingers unzipping it and throwing it away, tugging on ur panties now as his tongue licked his bottom lip;
His fingers slipped inside of ur panties as he pulled them down, hands spreading ur legs apart, his head going down to place wet kisses on your stomach and then down on ur tights, his tongue leaving a wet trail on ur skin and the sensation of his stubble on ur skin made u squirm, u felt his warm breath fan on your cunt as he placed a kiss on ur inner thigh, his hand wrapping around ur ankle lifting ur leg over his shoulder and giving you a playful smirk before diving in, his lips sucking and biting the sensitive skin on your thighs sending shivers down ur spine, his teeth digged into ur soft flesh making you bite your bottom lip struggling to contain ur sounds, his fingers spread ur pussy as his lips kissed their way to your dripping hole, his breath fanning over ur pussy before his tongue flattened against it, a groan escaping his lips as he savours the sweet taste of you.
His tongue licking his lips before he goes in for another lick before u felt it inside of u, your body jolts at the intrusion, the feeling of his tongue curling inside of u is too much, the warm and wet muscle sending sparks throughout your body and making your toes curl, your eyes closed your hands gripping the table behind u, and u swear the sound of his tongue working wonders inside of you is the most erotic thing u've ever heard, ur eyes moved to look at him noting the fact that his eyes are still on u watching your every move, and that made it so hard for u to be silent, u felt his thumb rubbing your clit, the action making you throw your head back and bite your lip harder, "Jay" you whined, making him smirk at you, his hands spreading ur tights apart his tongue moving in and out of you and the way you are trying to move your hips only encourages him more, he was loving the view and the way you looked so vulnerable and powerless, the way your eyes are closed, your hair is messy your hands are holding on to dear life behind u clearly wishing to grip his head instead, "such a good girl" he murmured his words vibrating inside of you, your head falling back as he goes deeper and your body twitches at the action "Jay" you cried, and you know he was smirking even though u can't see him, his movements got more aggressive, his teeth grazing your folds and his tongue licking the bundle of nerves inside of you, his eyes focused on you as he enjoys the way your body twitches and trembles under his touches, the knot in your stomach is too tight, and you were so close, but he didn't let you, his hands leaving ur thighs as he straightens his back, the loss of his warm tongue and the pressure inside of u was frustrating and the way he was looking at u was not helping, "please" u whispered crying making him groan before he chuckled
"don't worry princess" his voice raspy as his fingers trace the lines of ur neck going up to your cheek and pushing your hair behind ur ear, his fingers cupping your face his thumb tracing the line of ur lips sliping his thumb into ur mouth and u didn't hesitate to take it in and swirl your tongue around it, sucking it eagerly and making him groan at the sensation, the tip of his cock teasing ur entrance and u moaned at the feeling, his tip spreading your folds making you moan louder, "shhh" he teased and you wanted nothing but to scream his name and beg him to ruin u, his fingers pulled at the straps of ur bra, the material getting loose as your breasts spilled out of it, his hands groping them and playing with your nipples making u bite his thumb, and u felt a hard slap on ur left breast the sting so delicious yet it made u cry,tears falling down your cheeks as he removed his fingers from ur mouth his hand is moving to grip ur neck, his grip not tight enough to choke u but tight enough for you to know that he is in control, ur eyes rolled back when u felt his tip enter u, the pain and the stretch drove him insane, his tip almost halfway in as he waited for u to adjust and when u gave him the green light he didn't wait any longer his hips slaming into yours his grip on ur throat tightening
"f-fuck" u moaned head dropping to the desk hands resting uncomfortably under u, u felt his tip hitting ur g-spot and his thumb started rubbing ur clit, the overstimulation making u moan loudly and he tusked, his hand leaving ur neck and going to shut ur mouth, the way he was pounding into you was making u delirious, his tip hitting ur sweet spot with every thrust and his groans mixed with the dirty sounds coming from the slapping of your bodies were too much for you, his hand now gripping the tie and choking u, his fingers digging into ur thighs as he holds you still his hips snapping against yours, the knot in your stomach tightening , tears streaming down your cheeks making him even more horny.
He loved how pathetic and submissive you looked "shit" he growled his movements getting sloppier as he feels his own climax building, the way his tip hits your sweet spot is making you see stars and his fingers rubbing ur clit is not helping one bit, and you can feel yourself close, his deep groans and the way his abs contract as he fucks you made u closer, his grip on the tie is getting tighter as his other hand reaches to deliver a smack to ur clit, the action sending electric shocks all over your body and the tears in your eyes streamed down, your head dropping to the side his grip on the tie not letting u breathe as he pounds into you, his thrusts getting harder and deeper, "i'm so close baby" he groaned, and his words were the last thing you remember before ur vision went white squirting all over him, body shaking at how hard ur release hit you and soon after, u felt his cum filling u , his hand letting go of the tie and u gasped for air his body now resting on yours, his arms are the only thing holding him above u, his chest against yours as his forehead rests on the crook of your neck, both of you trying to catch your breath.
It was pretty hard for u to get out of his office that day, Jay helped u clean up but it wasn't enough as ur clothes weren't really in the state to be worn, he gave u his jacket the stickiness of ur blouse on the material was so embarrassing for u when u got home, yet ur heart was pounding at the good fuck and marks he left on ur body, u haven't really had anyone treat you that way before and it just made u fall more for him.
============================================
This was the first version i wrote for this ceo!jay and reader plot(?), i hope u enjoyed it even tho i prefer some other versions over it but i had to free this one first hahaha
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eamour · 2 months
Note
Hi i don't know if you'll reply/repost this ask but i really believe what i have to say is needed to help people in the manifestation community i am only sending this to you because you are one of the few active ones with a decent following that can get the word out..
The amount of complications people in this community have brought upon themselves is just infuriating and annoying the amount of creators/blog writers that come up with something new every week are just deceiving and preying on people who want to have a better life if you care i hope you'll post this.
Lies and overcomplications like;
'You shouldn't feel lack' 'don't focus on the 3d' 'know that you have it and go on with your life' 'this is the only way you can manifest' 'don't try to affirm or visualize it won't work its just endlessly affirming' 'feel it know' the amount of 3d and 4d 'live in imagination' is all a bunch of bs what Neville said is not the final! And you all seem to forget that
You can do all that and still get what you want sure! you can manifest this way too but why overcomplicate it?
(Yes there is a possibility that spreading this misinformation may not be necessarily intended to cause harm and might be just a misunderstanding from bloggers as well but it still causes to harm to those who are vulnerable and are just wanting to better their life and learn about manifesting)
None of this matters you are the only one who makes yourself manifest and there are many ways and you can use any way/method the problem on tumblr is people push only one way no you don't need to be fulfilled in imagination or 'know you have it and shut up in order to manifest sure Neville found a good way but its not the only way but the amount of people here who push this as if it's the only way and say if you don't do this you will never manifest are fcking playing with people's time and energy! i'm here to root for how far visualization affirming and robotic affirming goes,just for the average person its just such a quick and easy and 'failproof' way to 'get you desires' you don't need to hate the word 'get it' or something like that you don't have chase after knowledge or understanding to 'finaly manifest', when i went back to watching sammy and just affirming with no care about believe the thoughts no care about things like 3d or 4d no care about fulfilment or doing it to get it or anything like that...I've been carefree i don't worry at all...we are always learning about life and spirituality but you don't need an awakening or some sacred knowledge to manifest
You can read these posts that helped me but please no more,thats it no need to scroll and scroll and search for an answer
You don't need to read it all throughly just get the main idea you're good (most of them are short)
https://www.tumblr.com/imperfect777/744087420843245568/stop-scrolling-on-tumblr-twitter-pinterest-etc?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/miracledarling/715265433528320001/the-key-to-manifesting?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/sp0iledprincess55/744703729957257216/100-proof?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/dreamsintoreality111/672119540555153408/hey-do-you-prefer-to-change-appearance-through?source=share
My tips and experience..
All this time after being kinda obsessed with the void state (don't even get why people renamed the i am state by Neville lol) trying all things but just being lazy giving up restarting and going back to the old way of thinking, thinking 'why i fail' but now looking back and realizing i just got distracted and stopped never persisted .... now i realize how easy it is but what tumblr was doing was just discouraging me all along so many people lied or were misguided and said 'don't endlessly affirm just decide' implying if you try affirming you'll do it endlessly and never have what u want.. and so i listened....i used to watch sammy after a few videos last year i joined tumblr for a few 6 months at some point i was just reading things which have already been said and read..so i quit and decided to delete tumblr to just actually apply because reading the same thing over and over is no use...i'm now watching sammy ingram again so this is what i vouch for, affirming and thoughts watching sammy ingram (if just deciding or knowing seems like its not for you sammy ingram is great and in my opinion if i also just know or decide its mine then by affirming aren't i just reminding myself..'knowing' & 'deciding' in a way too?) again sammy joe dispenza is more helpful compared to tumblr over 6 months... i have logged back after a month typing this rn to help people and will delete my acc today even the creators i used to follow haven't posted in weeks and i urge people to leave tumblr after a certain point please live your life.
posting this for everyone who is currently overcomplicating the law and beating themselves up for not "doing it right". ♡
i want to add something: you can believe in all of these things (such as "feeling it real" instead of "affirming to get") and if it works for you, that’s good! that’s quite literally the law. but if it’s the opposite for you, if you think that it’s too much work and you would rather robotically affirm to get your desire, then do that.
i have seen both sides on tumblr and twitter, and they are both successful. it’s up to you what you want to make work for yourself!!
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fairuzfan · 6 months
Note
hello!! I don't know if this is appropriate (pls do not feel obligated to answer) but i was wondering what were ur thoughts on the israeli grass-roots movement Standing Together. I first found out abt them through a tumblr post that shared this substack article (https://theconnector.substack.com/p/if-its-not-helping-then-shut-the). the article immediately put an extremely bad taste in my mouth towards the movement and its founders, but i dont know if i'm being overly-critical of them.
Hey thanks for sending this in. No worries, it's totally ok. I was actually debating whether or not to publish this, mostly because I was afraid this would distract from Gaza, but I decided that it's imperative to stop normalizers from squeezing their way into the movement. Remember, the demands of the Palestinian people begin and end with liberation. Everything else is irrelevant and pointless to the cause.
So first off — I don't think you're being overly-critical of them at all. The first red flag of both this article and the group themselves is that they often exchange "Palestinian" with "Arab" and "Israeli" with "Jewish." That right off the bat shows me they have no respect for Palestinians and see Jewish people and Palestinians as mutually exclusive categories. I've spoken on this blog before about how racist it is to assume no Palestinian is Jewish and vice versa and this group really illustrates the forced division they imagine within their own goals and wording.
The article itself is quite anti-Palestinian in its erasure — it talks about avoiding words like "genocide," and "apartheid," and "ethnic cleansing" because "they are serious people trying to actually get something done." I really don't understand why not using those words makes you a serious person. If anything, it erases a description of how to define what it happening to Palestinians.
The whole redefinition of "peace" in this article and group is just calmness. These people are not advocating for peace in which families are reunited and land is given back — they are advocating for a muted version of the status quo of the current political system, just with less obviously fanatical governments. Peace cannot be attained when the people directly affected cannot have a say in defining it. They won't even say the word "apartheid." It's not some scholarly word with no meaning — it has actual consequences and effects on people (click). Palestinians are tried in military court. Their movement is monitored and restricted. It means that there are different legal systems for different people (click)! If you reject that this exists, then you're not interested in making the lives of Palestinians better — you're only interested in making your own life more comfortable.
As soon as you remove our ability to say words like "genocide" and "apartheid", you remove our ability to determine what happens specifically to Palestinians based on racism. By only saying "Palestinians are getting killed" an Israeli can come in and say "well so am I, by Hamas! Let's work together to end the killing" when it ignores that this is a systematic effort to completely wipe out all trace of Palestinians from the world.
It's like saying, "Don't say you have arthritis, say your joints hurt. And well, that happens to everyone, so let's just find a way to stop all our joints from hurting!" Then you work with people who fundamentally don't understand your pain and symptoms, oversimplifying your situation to the point of malicious universality. Sure, everyone's joints hurt, but my joints are hurting because my immune system is attacking them, not because of old age. You can't help my arthritis the same way you can wear a heat/cold patch to sooth your joints — there are other problems you're ignoring that all work together to cause me systematic pain and might cause bigger problems in the future if left untreated properly.
Similar symptoms don't mean similar causes and ignoring that is fundamentally ignoring the root issue and attempting to trivialize Palestinian's suffering. As soon as you take away the words to describe our situation, it doesn't sound so bad, does it?
Now, basically, the... weirdest part of the article is this excerpt:
People like him in Israel are very aware of how the left here is talking about them, and it’s not helping. “You can call me a colonizer or a settler,” he declared, “but I’m not going anywhere. And neither are the Palestinians.” When people chant, “Palestine will be free,” he said, “we Israelis hear, ‘without you.’ In the same way that a lot of Palestinians hear the ministers in Bibi’s government speak and think they want to do the same thing to them.” The problem as they both see it is that we are caught between two polar opposites. “Hamas believes in Greater Palestine,” Green said. “And on the other side we have people who believe in the idea of Greater Israel.” Indeed, that concept is in the charter of Netanyahu’s Likud Party. “Both sides have very problematic governing bodies,” he added. And the status quo of maintaining the occupation and managing the conflict has been exploded now.
Well, first off, Hamas is not the only one who believes in "Greater Palestine." Palestinians around the globe have been fighting for that since 1948. Second off, it's quite odd that you would center yourself in the wake of the ongoing slaughter of 10,000 people, with no end in sight. Right now, I would assume you'd be advocating for an end to the mass killings first and foremost, but you seem to be more worried about your right to stolen land.
Third, this completely erases the violence done to Palestinians the past 75+ years in favor for a "peace" that will only allow citizens of Israel comfort in their lives. Sure Palestinian citizens of Israel might have more comfortable lives, maybe (although I doubt it). But what about Gaza, which has been ravaged by Israel? What about the people in the Occupied Territories, whose economy depends on Israel, which controls it? What about the millions of refugees around the world who can't so much as see the place where they grew up because they've been exiled? The colonization of Palestine by Israel is not so old — there are people STILL ALIVE who participated in the massacres of Palestinians in 1948 and 1967 and walk around without facing any real consequences for that. My great-grandmother had seen both and she only passed away a couple of years ago. Where is the "peace" for her? Where is the "peace" for millions like her who still dream of going back to their childhood home?
This group AND the article tries to cloud your view into illustrating two opposing groups with equal power. They aren't. Palestinians, unfortunately, endure systematic oppression both within Gaza and throughout Palestine. Each and every time they try to resist peacefully, they've been shot, abducted, or imprisoned. The Great March of Return is one such example. BDS is also an example, yet that has constantly been outlawed by American governments. There have been a plethora of Palestinian artists, writers, and filmmakers who have been silenced or killed for advocating for a Free Palestine. Most recently, this included Heba Abu-Nada who was an award winning poet and writer who was martyred on October 20th after getting shelled by an Israeli missile. Ghassan Kanafani also was assassinated last century. The list goes on. Palestinians have no hope of "changing the system from within" because that internal change will always depend on the mercy of the Israelis that pretend to ally themselves with the Palestinians. Someone in Gaza cannot leave their refugee camp and go back to their ancestral home because no one in this group is advocating for that — and remember, the right of return is an essential part of the demands of the Palestinian people and we cannot ignore that for a forced "peace" that favors calmness over actual justice.
Now as we examine the group themselves, here is their mission statement/goal:
Standing Together is a progressive grassroots movement mobilizing Jewish and Palestinian citizens of Israel against the occupation and for peace, equality, and social justice. We know that the majority have far more in common than that which sets us apart and only a tiny minority benefits from the status quo. The future that we want-peace and independence for Israelis and Palestinians, full equality for everyone in this land, and true social, economic, and environmental justice — is possible. To achieve this future, we must stand together as a united front: Jewish and Palestinian, secular and religious, Mizrahi and Ashkenazi, rural and urban, and people of all genders and sexual orientations. As the largest Jewish-Arab grassroots movement in Israel, we are committed to creating an alternative to our existing reality and building the political strength to make this transformation possible.
Yet again, they are separating "Palestinian" and "Jewish," reinforcing this dichotomy that's so harmful. AND they're interchanging "Palestinian" and "Arab," which erases the diversity within Palestinian society. A group that makes the distinction between "Palestinian" and "Jewish" shows that they are not interested in the restitution of Palestinians but rather solidifying their own position within society by emphasizing a false dichotomy between "Palestinians" and "Jews" with no potential for overlap.
They mention "true justice" but "true justice" doesn't exist if there are no reparations towards the people who have been exiled and displaced, murdered, and tortured the past 75+ years. Justice is not an abstract concept — it is adhering to the demands of the people most impacted by systematic oppression, which is the Palestinians.
Looking at their leadership, there are only a couple of Palestinians with the vast majority of them being non-Palestinian. Sorry, but I'm wholly uninterested in "peace" and "equality" movements that are not made up of majority Palestinians. It's only common sense that you would expect such a movement to be led by Palestinians themselves — but this group seems to use Sally Abed as a token Palestinian who furthers their narrative of wanting "peace" in Israeli society. And even looking at their action items, you can see they make a point about emphasizing safety for the *Israeli* citizens above all else, stating that their far right government does nothing to serve the citizens of Israel. They claim it will also bring safety for Gazans, but how? You can advocate for a change in the government, yes, but if the people in Gaza are subject to getting their rights taken away based on the whims of whoever happens to be in power then no amount of "internal" activism in Israeli society will help them. They will always be at the mercy of the people who have a vested interest in erasing the people of Gaza and the West Bank so that they may take over their land.
Please remember, the civil rights movement of the 60s and the BLM Movement of this century were led by and FOR Black people of the United States because they were the ones making the demands for a change in their circumstances. Because at the end of the day, the people who are the most oppressed deserve the right to decide how their future appears and should not be dictated by the oppressor in any way.
This group tries to make a separation between the "Israeli people" and the "Israeli government." Right away, I have to laugh. They act as if the colonization of Palestine is too old for anyone to remember its origins — no. I had family living in Palestine as recently as '67. Maybe *this* generation didn't choose to settle in Palestine, but the previous generation did. And the generations before that. Before 1948, Israel didn't even exist. Hell, before a couple hundred years ago, BORDERS didn't exist. Not to mention, mandatory conscription means that most civilians will have been directly part of the suppressing forces, making them liable for the material effects of colonization. Why are people so resistant to the idea of undoing colonialism and its effects? I cannot think of any other reason than because they have a vested interest in keeping those borders up, in emphasizing nationality because they're one of the groups of people that is benefited from the establishment of a "Jewish State."
So in that, unless you call for an end to the idea of the "Jewish State" in Palestine, then I cannot think of you as a sincere advocate for Palestinian rights — this group especially plays at normalization of a muted version of the status quo rather than actual justice and reparations. The "Israeli advocates" within this group will benefit first and foremost in their own activism — therefore it's hard for me to view them in a positive light.
All activism for Palestinians should center around giving Palestinians reparations, as well as giving reparations to all indigenous victims of colonization. I think this group only tries to muddy the waters to make people forget what they're fighting for. I honestly do not understand why liberation scares you, if it means that no nation-state will have complete and total power over you and your family.
"Free Palestine" is an anti-colonial movement. Such a thing is possible — but you have to try to make it possible. Those against the unending liberation of all people are one of those who have the most to benefit from the continuation of colonization.
Right now, your main concern should be the people of Gaza and the people of the West Bank, and ensuring their safety and longevity in the face on continued erasure. "Peace" is all well and good but who exactly gets to define that? Who gets to benefit most from it? Unless you can unequivocally answer "ALL Palestinians," then you're not an ally — you're only interested in helping yourselves.
Remember — the fact that we even had to fight for our rights is itself an injustice. At the very least, ask the people who are most affected what they want before you listen to Israelis who have a vested interest in keeping the state of Israel alive.
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wonwoosthetic · 9 days
Note
Hi! So I have a newer idea for Daryl that popped up in my mind while shopping today. It's 100% okay if you don't want to write this, though! It is kind of long so I completely understand if you don't feel like writing this 💜
Basically, Daryl meets reader, aka Shane's fiancé, at the quarry and could instantly notice how toxic Shane was to her. She wasn't allowed to really talk to any of the guys in the camp and was forced to do most of the laundry to keep her from interacting with the rest of the group. However, one day while Shane's off doing you-know-what with Lori, Dale sends reader to go hunt with Daryl with a compound bow that he'd found. To Daryl's surprise, she's amazing at hunting and they have a little convo about Shane. They then stumble across Shane and Lori going at it like rabbits but silently retreat, not making a scene. Back at the camp, when Shane returns, reader simply just places the ring back in his hand and tells him they're over. Being free to do what she wants, she starts getting closer with Daryl over the next month or so, and when they get to the CDC, her and Daryl have this cute moment with a few people watching them and then Glenn, in his drunken stupor, makes a comment about what a cute couple they are. Cue the sudden realizations from both sides that they like each other. Can end with a confession or not. <33
a/n – first of all, to everyone who reads this: you better check Krys out! I am absolutely IN LOVE with everything she writes (Daryl and Hazel is my favourite but literally everything is a masterpiece!) second: to get a request from one of my favourite authors on this app here is an ABSOLUTE HONOUR and I truly truly hope that I could somehow reach your expectations!!!! Thank you so much for sending me it, and I really hope you and everyone that reads this enjoys it ˙ᵕ˙ thank you for marking my start in writing for Daryl now too!😊
A little side note: surprise, I still can’t write short stuff, but bc tumblr is a bitch and is messing with long stuff I post, I decided to make 2 parts, so I can truly involve everything I planned, I hope that’s okay!!🤍🤍
masterlist
word count – 7.4k
pairing – daryl dixon x fem!reader, shane walsh x ex!fem!reader (rarely)
warnings – cursing, mentions of sex, infidelity, toxic man
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Don‘t Talk To Strangers Or You Might Fall In Love – Pt. 1
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Later in the evening, the women gathered down at the quarry once again. With each holding onto a basket of some sort, carrying the laundry of the rest of the camp residents, they had found their usual spot by the water. Their hands were already starting to get wrinkly by the amount of clothes they had to wash - it had only been a couple of days, and there was already a pile of it.
A wince from the oldest woman of the group made all three heads snap towards her, their eye following her carefully.
"Everything okay?" Jacqui asked, stopping mid-movement before she set down the soaked t-shirt she was holding.
Carol was quick to brush off her concerned tone, sending the woman a quick tight smile as she re-adjusted her position on the ground.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," she cleared her throat. "Just... a stone."
The other women shared a quick knowing look. Yes, the surface they were sitting on was mostly stone, but not enough to get hurt or even wince the way Carol just did. She must've hit one of her bruises against the hard ground. One of the many that decorated her skin. While some of them she had clearly been able to hide underneath her clothing, the women couldn't help but notice the ones on her arms. And while some seem to fade, it didn't take much longer for new ones to appear just a day later.
"You know," Amy jumped into the conversation. "You... you don't have to share a tent with him." Everybody immediately knowing, who she meant. "You could stay in the RV, or-"
"I'm okay, Amy. Please." Carol's tone made the younger woman stop again, going right back to the task at hand. While you had hoped you'd go back to finish off your work in silence, Jaqui had other plans as she raised the volume of her voice to reach you, who was sitting a little further off.
"Well, speaking of shitty husbands." Getting a scoff out of the older woman. "Where's Shane, Y/N?" A chuckle erupted from Amy. 
"Huh?" Your head shot up at the mention of his name. You found three awaiting pairs of eyes fixed on you, sending an uncomfortable rush down your spine.
"Where's your husband?" Amy repeated the question, her voice holding a slightly more gentle tone.
"He's not my husband. Just... fiancé." You shrugged. "I don't know...," mumbling as you were almost too embarrassed to admit. "He said something about going hunting."
Jacqui let out an annoyed huff of air. "That was hours ago. It's getting dark soon, doesn't he think-"
"I trust him to know how to keep himself safe. He knows what he's doing," you told her mindlessly, pouring the now dirty water back into the river in front of you. 
You knew how most of the group felt about Shane. He had declared himself as the leader of your little group, thinking his status as a sheriff made him the right fit despite some of the eye-rolls and annoyed sighs it had gotten from the rest in return. It didn't seem to bother him, not even a little bit. You had tried to defend him, wanting to explain his plan of action and knowledge to the others, but he had shushed you down quickly. His own stance was enough for him to stand in front of the group of people, promising to lead them well and try to figure out how to move forward in the, what you'd now call, apocalypse.
While he was securing his place as the tough leader, commanding each person around and giving them a set role in the group, you had tried to find a sense of community. If you were to go and travel further with these people, might as well try to create some form of comradery. But that was brought to a halt before you could even truly start. By Shane.
'They're not your friends. They're just random people. We don't know them and we don't gotta know them.' He had told you. You had tried to start an argument, wanting to explain that while you didn't know most of them just yet, you might as well start now if you're going to spend more time in an enclosed area with them. 
'Let's keep an eye out for Lori and Carl. She just lost her husband, for God's sake.' He never really explained just how he knew that Rick was officially dead, but the two members of the Grimes family seemed to be his only concern. The fact that you had known Glenn for a while now and considered him a close friend, almost a younger brother, didn't even register with him. He was just 'another dirty man, just like the rest of them' to Shane. He had made his opinion of the members of your group very clear. They're strangers. If it wasn't about Lori and Carl, it wasn't important. Why you were the one washing their clothes though was still beyond you though.
Jacqui was just about to open her mouth again, not wanting to drop the topic of conversation just yet, but a loud voice from up the quarry got your attention.
"Ya just don't give a shit, ya old bastard!" Daryl's uncanny accent echoed through the open area.
While a deep sigh tumbled from Carol's lips, Amy tried to ignore the fight a few feet away from you and Jacqui shook her head.
"These Dixon brothers, I swear to God... I don't understand why we haven't made them leave yet."
"Daryl's a good hunter," Amy commented quietly with a slight shrug.
"Yeah, and selfish," the older woman spat back, "And Merle? He's nothing but dragging everyone here down."
You decided to leave the scene in silence, not wanting to add anything to the conversation. You believed that everyone had a good reason for acting and behaving the way they were. You'd like to think that your good nature was part of the reason why Shane fell in love with you. Your years of dealing with children coming from troubled families had taught you that there's mostly good in almost everyone, just that most hadn't had the chance to find that side of them yet. In some ways, the Dixon brothers' attitudes reminded you of them. 
Back in the camp, you brought the washing bowl back to where the rest of the clean laundry was already hanging to dry. Before you could go any further, hoping to find some alone time in your tent, Dale's voice made you stop.
"Y/N!"
You looked up at the top of his RV, where he had secured a chair, a small table and an umbrella to keep the sun from frying his skin.
"Hey, Dale," you smiled at the older man, who copied your facial expression. While some had come to find him to be a 'typical grumpy old man' - and by some you mean Shane - you and Dale had gotten closer over the short time you had spent in the group. He reminded you of your dad, who at that point in time was God knows where. You hoped he found a group similar to yours and was trying to find his place in the world you would now be living in.
"You know how to use a bow and arrow, right?" He asked you, remembering the story you had told him.
You nodded, shielding your eyes with one hand as the sun was starting to make them hurt. "My dad taught me a little, why?"
"Look what I found," he grinned before turning around to pick something up. He crouched down, now with a compound bow in his grip as he tried to get it down to you. With quick steps, you got closer, your eyes brightening up at the sight.
"Oh my god... Dale!" Your smile only widened once you got your hands on the bow. You let your hand glide over the metal, finding it to be heavier than expected. It was still in perfect condition, but you couldn't even finish admiring it before your eyes found another item being dropped down at you.
"Those were next to it," Dale added as he handed you a bag holding multiple arrows that were hopefully supposed to go with the bow. He watched your smile as you couldn't take your eyes off the archery tool. "You think you know how to handle that thing?"
"I mean... my dad taught me how to use a longbow, but... can't be that hard, right?"
The older man couldn't even answer you as a scoff erupted from behind you, followed by the familiar scruff voice of Darly.
"Ya think it's that easy." Stating it more than wondering. Knowing not to start a conversation with him unless truly needed, only able to imagine how Shane would react if he found you talking to him, you decided to ignore his comment, focusing back on Dale who seemed to have done the same.
"Where did you find it?" You asked him.
"Oh just... from a house a few minutes away. Thought you could use it."
"I don't know when yet, but... I'll try," you smiled at him.
"How about you go and try it out now?" He suddenly asked you.
His question made your head shoot back up to look at him in wonder. "Now? What do you mean?"
He sighed. "It's gonna get dark soon and Shane and Lori aren't back yet, we should try-"
"Lori?" Her name fell from your lips as you glanced around the area, only finding the youngest Grimes sitting in the grass, entertaining himself with some sticks and stones. "Where is she?"
Dale shrugged. "Said something about finding berries and whatnot-" Another scoff from behind you made him stop to shoot Daryl an annoyed glance. "I think we should try to at least get something to eat for the kids. And if they're not back anytime soon, they won't have dinner."
"What? My huntin' skills ain't enough for you, old man?" The younger Dixon brother shot up from his crouched position on the floor, nudging his head up at Dale, who was clearly annoyed by his attitude.
"A squirrel isn't gonna feed an entire group. Take Y/N with you and try finding something."
"Dale-"
"Shane's not here, honey," he immediately stopped you, apparently already knowing what your argument would be. "I think he'll be okay, knowing you were out finding something to eat for the kids."
"That asshole would rather watch 'em kids die than send her huntin' with any of us!" Daryl spat back, ignoring you standing right next to him.
He turned your head towards him. "Don't talk about him like that." Speaking to him in a much softer tone than he just did, only getting a shake of his head and an annoyed mumble in return before he turned his back towards you, making his way towards the woods. A quick glance back up at Dale made him nudge his head towards the direction the archer had just disappeared into. You could either get sulky and refuse to go with the man who had clearly other interests than to go hunting with you or you could be the bigger person and focus on bringing something into the community. Even if that meant rebelling against your partner's order to stay at the camp and focusing on the laundry in the quarry. You decided on the latter, knowing that he'd find something to get annoyed at one way or another.
With a sigh, you nodded to Dale's proposal and swung the bag of arrows over your shoulder. Turning around to follow the way Daryl had just strutted, your eyes found his silhouette already between the trees. It was uncanny. Anyone could tell it was him. His zero-fucks attitude and his arms just casually hanging by his side- The pop of his hips with each step he took just underlined the sass that man possessed almost making you chuckle.
Unlike a lot of the other members of the group, you didn't necessarily dislike him. His brother was a totally different subject. They were difficult to deal with and most definitely not the teamwork type of personalities - not directly at least. You had noticed the multiple times Daryl would vanish from sight, only to come back a few hours later with a few dead squirrely thrown over his shoulder, that he would then give to the group after skinning them. It was absolutely disgusting, to say the least, but he did his part to be a valuable part of the community, even if he might had been a unique character and more challenging to deal with. 
What Merle's issue was, you had yet to discover, but the man didn't intrigue you enough to bore into his background story.
A good few minutes in, you still hadn't caught up with the archer, his steps being way bigger and faster than yours. Panting, you hoped he would hear you.
"Can you slow down for a second? Please."
Not following your words, Daryl kept up his pace, only turning his head slightly. "Don't need yer husband to see us together out'ere or we'll be the ones rotatin' over the fire instead of a dear."
You couldn't help but roll your eyes at his comment, even scoffing loudly at what you had just heard, and mumbling too quietly for him to hear.
Your reaction made him suddenly stop in his tracks and turn his entire body towards you. "What? Ya think I'm kiddin'? I seen the way he talks to ya and everyone else in that godforsaken camp. Treats everyone like shit if it ain' abou' that woman or the kid."
Your glare didn't even intimidate him a bit. Neither did he budge when you took a daring step closer to him.
"How about you focus on yourself and stay out of other people's business? He's trying to be a leader, alright?"
"More like tryna be a dictator. Mussolini woulda loved him." Without another word, he turned around to continue his way further into the woods, leaving you in slight surprise rooted into the ground. A shake of your head and a deep breath brought you back into the present, making you follow him again. You tried to keep the distance between big enough to keep him away from you, let close enough to still have him in view - you sure as hell weren't going to get lost in the middle of the woods.
Looking down to be careful about each step you took, you held onto the strap across your chest. With your view on the ground, you didn't notice Daryl having stopped again, making you suddenly bump into him.
"Oh- sorry." You took a quick jump back.
He had lifted up his arm to the side, keeping you from going any further. Only after looking up, you could follow his gaze, finding what had gotten the archer so enthralled. Between the bushes surrounding you ahead on a tree, there were two chipmunks perked up on a branch. They hadn't noticed you yet and if it hadn't been for Daryl's eagle eye, you had to admit, you would've overlooked them as well.
Suddenly, overly confident, you realised this was the moment you could prove your skill. A skill you hadn't trained for in a few months, but you had long enough training before that, you believed. Swiftly, you grabbed a bow from the bag on your back and took a slow step back, careful not to make any loud noise to disrupt the two animals. Daryl had his crossbow already sitting on his shoulder, his eye trained on the chipmunks as he kept totally still.
"On three," you whispered as you drew the bow in your grip. You couldn't see the archer's slight confusion as he didn't budge, only knowing he had heard you when he suddenly started counting down. As soon as the number 'three' left his lips, you let your arrow shoot through the sky, him going at the exact same time, pressing the trigger on his crossbow. The two bows hit the chipmunks perfectly in sync, making them fall from the branch and onto the floor.
"Yes!" You whispered to yourself in a cheer, brushing past Daryl with a wide smile on your face as you made your way over to where your prey was waiting for you.
The man continued to stand still, only his eyes following your movements as his eyebrows scrunched together in confusion. Only a few seconds later, he found you standing up straight again, proudly holding up one of the chipmunks. He followed your steps, coming to a stop as he looked down at the other animal still on the floor.
"Was that beginner's luck or...?" He asked you as he gathered it off the ground and took out his arrow before taking its companion out of your hands to put both of them into the small bag he had secured by his hips. Your eyes drifted to his arms. Glistening in the sun behind you. He had been collecting dirt all over his body, but the sweat now on his biceps was making it look only half as bad.
You shrugged, not even trying to hide the small smile still on your lips. "Maybe a little since I haven't used one of these in a while," holding up the compound bow.
"Who taught ya?" In surprise, you glanced at him, not expecting to continue the conversation as you went back to resume your hunting journey through the woods.
"My dad."
You noticed his steps suddenly slowing down again, making you turn towards him in wonder. A finger brought up to his lips told you everything you needed to know. Daryl started looking around carefully, while you just turned in a circle, wondering what he had heard. And then you saw it. A 'geek', as Glenn had labelled them, was making its way towards you.
"How on earth did you hear that?" You whispered at him, but the archer just propped his crossbow up again, ready to take out the thing coming dangerously close towards you. The noises coming from the dead had only then started to register with you too. Maybe it was your hearing turning on you or maybe Daryl had just a trained ear. Realising that he was close to shooting again, you stopped him with a hand.
"Can I?"
With a careful look, he lowered his weapon again, motioning for you to go ahead, bringing a small grin to your face. His hand was quicker than yours as he pulled out a bow from your bag, handing it over to you before leaving you to do your thing. Drawing it tightly, you didn't let a lot more seconds pass before sending the arrow straight through the geek's eye.
"Fuck, yeah-" Grinning to yourself for a split second before you realised the words that had dropped from your tongue. "Sorry," you were quick to apologise, getting a look of pure confusion from Daryl in return.
"What? Ya not allowed to curse or somethin'?" Oh, if he only knew. After years of being with Shane, you had found yourself truly swearing off the usage of any curse words as your fiancé had labelled them 'unladylike', sending you a look of disapproval each time it would escape you accidentally. Strict looks had turned into warnings, which then turned into arguments, so you had just learned to bite your tongue.
You were about to head up to get it back, back Daryl's voice stopped you.
"Stay'ere." He walked past you towards the now truly dead thing to get your arrow back. After ripping it out of its head again, he took a good look around, turning his entire body before coming back to you.
"They're usually not alone," he pushed the arrow into your hands. "Let's see what else we can find and get the hell outta 'ere before it gets dark."
You just nodded in agreement before following him again. This time, you noticed walking side by side with him as he had slowed down his strides.
To you, it seemed like a relatively comfortable silence, but Daryl didn't agree with that apparently as his grunt slashed through it,
"Yer husband know you can hunt?"
A sigh evidently fell from your lips, but you were able to hold back a roll of your eyes. He was trying to keep up the conversation and you couldn't not admit that you quite enjoyed not necessarily having to walk in complete silence. Even if it meant talking about Shane apparently.
"Don't know," you shrugged.
"What d'ya mean, ya don't know? Yer never talked about that? Ain't he supposed to know ya inside out or some shit like that?" You knew, deep down his words held nothing but truth, yet, you had learned to ignore remarks like that, knowing that Shane was just a different kind of partner than most.
"Why should he know about something he's not interested in?" As long as you weren't out on your own and at home in the evening with a homecooked meal waiting for him, he had never truly cared about what you did. Lying, you'd be out with your friends for a few hours while doing something completely different had gotten you far. Him working late hours most days only helped. You never even thought about telling him about the childhood hobby you had started at 8 years old and had carried with you up until well into adulthood. While you had left home as soon as you had turned 18, knowing Atlanta was the place you'd want to study in, archery was one of the things that had kept you connected to home. To your dad.
"That don't sound righ' if ya ask me," he commented.
"Well," you couldn't help but sigh again, "good thing he's not your issue to worry about."
"But he is." His comment made you stop. Daryl was quick to notice you not walking beside him anymore, making him stop and turn. "I gotta worry about him havin' my balls on a stick if he sees me talkin' to ya."
"Then don't!"
"Then why d'ya follow me into the woods, huh?" It looked like you were about to start a fight with Daryl Dixon.
"Because Dale asked me to. Because no one trusts you to do anything good for the group on your own," you spat at him, continuing your way, making sure to bump his shoulder as you passed him.
The archer scoffed, "Yeah because everyone trusts ya lil' husband oh so much to care for every-"
You came to another halt. "He's not my husband! We're engaged, you ignorant fuck!"
"Oh, careful," Daryl eyed you, "What would'e say if he heard ya talkin' like that, huh?" Sending you a provocative look that made you take a deep breath in, trying to contain your anger.
"I think you got a brother to worry about, Dixon. Enough drama there, don't snoop into other people's lives."
That seemed to have done the job as he kept quiet while you walked ahead. It took a few seconds before you heard him behind you again, proud of yourself for leaving him stunned even if it was just for a short moment. You didn't want to snap at him like that, you had to admit. It just came out and if you could take it back, you would've. He wasn't directly snooping, you knew that. You weren't here to make enemies, at least you didn't want to. You desperately wanted to get along with everyone as best as possible. Not meaning that you'd have to become close friends with each person in the group, just good colleagues.
With your mind deep in thought, overthinking every word you had just dropped, you didn't notice the ruffling leaves close by. Not until you felt a tug on your arm that made you stop. Almost annoyed, you turned around, only to find Daryl lifting his finger to his lips, telling you to keep quiet. At first, you looked at him in confusion but the moment you heard a grunt, your ears perked up as you started to glance around. You had just ran into a geek with the Dixon brother reminding you that they usually travelled in bigger groups, meaning the possibility of another one being close by wasn't that small.
The grunting continued making your frown only deepen. It didn't necessarily sound like one of the dead, you realised. Daryl started moving around slowly and as quietly as possible, you following close behind, keeping ducked down just in case.
Suddenly, you caught another noise. One that sounded less like a grunt and more like a... moan? Clearly just as confused as you, the archer turned around to meet your gaze for a split second. 
With each step the two of you took further, the noises became much clearer. Shuffling leaves, grunts, and clear moans were now hitting your ear. One specific huff of air made a cold shiver run down your spine. It's like your body knew before your eyes could even see it.
Daryl and you hit a raised ground that kept you from seeing where the noise was coming from as you were still crouched down. But as soon as you let your back straighten, every last bit of air left your lungs. You saw the auburn hair spread out on the grass first. Directly next to it, an all too familiar head of black curls, the face deep in her neck, muting the moans coming from him. With each pound, they became heavier and louder. You already knew it. Right as Shane lifted his head though, you could feel yourself wanting to scream. And if it wasn't for the hand suddenly covering your mouth, you would've.
You were pulled onto the ground, back into your crouched position, and dragged back from where you came from. As hard as you tried to fight the grip the archer had on you, it was no use as he was clearly much stronger than you. The leaves and branches brushed against your pants as he kept tugging on you to keep you right up against him, not daring to loosen the hand covering your lip
Once it seemed far away enough for him, Daryl let go of you, letting you fall to the ground completely as you desperately choked up for air.
"You bastard-" You went at him, only for him to cover your mouth once again.
He pulled you in hard. "Ya screamin' 'ere and an entire hoard will hear ya. Keep quiet," he hissed at you in a whisper. You never noticed the soft specks of green that decorated his striking blue eyes. Not until then.
A quick moment of silence followed as your eyes suddenly filled with tears. Daryl's gaze softened immediately, removing his hand from you as if your skin had turned into burning hot metal.
While you had started to sob in the middle of the woods, trying to keep as quiet as possible, the archer didn't know what else to do, but to stand next to you, his eyes fixed on your shaking shoulders. He wasn't the right person to console someone. Nor did he even know how.
"I told ya he's an asshole," he mumbled, clearly not at the right moment as you sent him an angry frown.
"You didn't tell me sh-"
"I tried tellin' ya!" Raising his voice just a bit to turn his tone stern, yet keeping the volume low enough. "I told ya he ain't interested in anyone but that woman and her son."
"I want to go back," you sniffled, feeling your chest painfully tightening.
"Go back to 'em?!"
"Back to the camp, idiot!" You snapped at him, your hand flying up to your chest. "I feel like I'm gonna throw up." Trying to take deep breaths in that just continuously proved to be hard as you only choked up more. Coughing mixed with your sobs, you fell onto your knees, your hand clutching the very top of your chest as you tried to breathe.
"Hey-" Daryl fell onto the ground right in front of you, his rough hands grabbing you by your shoulders to pull you straight, trying to get you to look at him. "Calm down," he strictly told you.
"H-He-" you sobbed, "he... fucked her. He just-", coughing again as the air got stuck in your throat.
"I know- hey-" you lowered your head to look at the ground beneath you, only for Darly to grab your chin and make you look back up again. "He's a fuckin' idiot. Don't cry 'bout him."
"W-What did I do?" You asked, technically hypothetically, as you continued to choke on your own cries. "What do- How?!"
"Ya didn't do anythin'," he tried to console you. "He's a dumb fuckin' bastard. A coward. A stupid mongo-"
"Lori... I-I thought-," stopping yourself again as another sob shot through your body.
"It's okay," Daryl whispered, "don't fuckin' cry for 'em. Ya think they would cry for ya?"
"What about Carl?!" You ignored his comment, instead continuing to throw out whatever came to your head.
The archer shook his head, "That ain' your problem to worry 'bout."
"She- she just lost her husband... a-and now this?!" 
Before Daryl could say anything, you brushed off his hands from your shoulders and raked yourself up.
Still sniffling, you looked around. "We gotta go back." Noticing that the sun had already started to set and no one was supposed to be out in the dark.
With a grunt, he copied you, pushing himself up to stand again while his eyes continued to follow you as you tried to get yourself back together. You could feel his gaze burning holes into your skin, making you look up. Cheeks tears stained, burning read. Your eyes were swollen, still letting single drops of tears escape as you slowly managed to even out your breathing.
"Let's go back." You re-secured the bag and bog on your shoulder before turning around to walk to the camp. A sigh escaped Daryl's lips as he shook his head slightly before jogging up towards you, stopping you with his hands back on your shoulders. He swiftly turned you around, only to let go again, his steps slowing down to let you walk ahead. This time, in the right direction.
The way back was spent mostly in silence, only a few remarks coming from the archer each time he had to tell you to either turn right or left. In no time, you had come back, finding most of the group either already back in their tents or gathered by the SUV. The sun had fully set, now the only source of natural light coming from the soft glow of the moon.
"There you are!" Dale called out as soon as his eyes found you. The smile that had started to spread on his lips fell quickly as soon as you got close enough to him to let him see the dishevelled state you were in. "What happened?" He gasped, but you just shook your head and made a quick B-turn towards your tent. The tent you shared with Shane.
The older man's tone changed quickly, clearly blaming one specific person for your mood as he followed behind you not much later.
"What the hell did you do to her?" Dale snapped at Daryl, only to get a scoff in return.
"How abou' you ask her asshole fiancé." The Dixon brother left him with that, ignoring the looks of the people around them. He opened his satch to take out the two chipmunks you had caught, only to throw them onto a set-up table and disappear down towards the quarry.
In the comfort of the plastic walls, with the bow and arrows set down outside, you had let yourself let go one more time, the tears not needing more than mere seconds before running down your cheeks again. You couldn't continue crying about this.
'Ya think they would cry for ya?'
Daryl's words rang through your mind. You hated to admit that he was most probably right.
Your relationship with Shane wasn't tense. At least until a few months ago. It had always been a little bit more difficult than you would've liked to, but you remembered the words of your mother, saying 'marriage is hard', making you realise that most likely each couple had their fair share of issues to work through. And you and Shane seemed to just have a good amount of those. Either disagreements, discussions, or different ideas and wants. Everything from as simple as the colour of your living room walls, to which state you'd have your wedding in - since your grandma was almost bedridden, you had proposed to have at least the officiant ceremony in Ohio, but Shane was, surprise, against that.
You glanced down at your ring. A gold band, holding a small square diamond right in the middle. It was beautiful. Even though you had always solely worn silver jewellery and had mentioned the classic round diamond as your dream style. Still, you had accepted the proposal. You looked past the smirks he would send waitresses and secretaries. Ignored comments he made about other people in your life. You had even given in and promised him not to get too close to anyone in the group that was right outside.
It was never 'controlling' in your eyes. You didn't know any better. But while you had to lock yourself away, making doing laundry your only form of 'entertainment', he was having fun with a presumed widow. Whereas he had told you and everyone else that he would be spending the day trying to hunt down 'something big'. 
You shook your head. You had all the reasons to leave him already months ago and yet you didn't. A lot of your friends had told you you'd regret marrying him. But he had managed to get into your head, making you think that they were the crazy ones. That all of your 'dumb sorority girlfriends' had no idea what they were talking about.
Comments and stares were one thing you could look past, but cheating... you had to draw the line somewhere. You remembered all the times your college friends came crying into the dorm, sobbing into their pillows as they complained about their boyfriends fucking around with other girls on campus. Everyone would gather and support them with one opinion: dump him. Leave him. He doesn't deserve you.
'I told ya he ain't interested in anyone but that woman and her son.'
There was Daryl's voice again in the back of your head. Screaming at you. If even he could see it, yet you were too blind to realise it...
With one final deep breath in, you gathered the sleeping bag you had claimed for yourself into your arms, along with your pillow. You managed to drag everything out of the tent, suddenly feeling more free than ever.
Looking around, you found no one sitting outside anymore, indicating most had gone to bed, but the light inside the RV made you hopeful. You couldn't sleep in your shared tent tonight. Or ever again. And Dale was your only other choice. With everything packed in your arms, you made your way over to the vehicle, knocking on the door with your foot. Two voices made you look behind you, your face immediately falling when you found Shane and Lori coming back from the woods. They took their goddamn time.
The door opened, catching your attention again. Dale looked at you in confusion but before he could say anything, you beat him to it.
"Can I sleep here tonight?"
Forget about your age. Suddenly, you felt like a little kid again. Too scared to sleep on their own, begging their parents to let them sleep in their room.
"Y/N?" Shane's rough voice called out your name, making your heartbeat quicken.
You looked up at the older man in panic. "Please."
With no hesitation, Dale nodded, stepping aside to let you walk in, ushering you inside with his hand. Daryl's remark from earlier had engraved itself in his brain as soon as he found the sheriff strutting over to his RV in big steps.
"What is she doing, Dale?" He wondered, his voice holding slight anger to it. "Y/N!" He shouted out your name again, but you gave him no response.
The older man stopped Shane from coming any closer.
"You better leave, son."
"What the fuck did I do?!" He unknowingly asked before getting the RV's door closed in his face.
The moment silence took over the enclosed room, Dale turned to you, now sitting on the small sofa.
"What the fuck did he do?"
If there was one person in this apocalyptic world that you had come to trust, it was Dale. He had already let you into his home, he deserved to get a reason for it.
You could already feel the tears filling your eyes again. Both of you ignored the knocks on the door, the old man's eyes fixed solely on you as he sat down by the small dining table, ready to wait patiently for you to answer his question.
"He... he cheated on me...," You couldn't hold back the sob that followed. "With Lori." The added remark made Dale's eyebrows shoot up in surprise. He leaned back into his chair, taking off his hat to run a hand through his hair as he huffed out a chunk of air.
"Daryl and I- we saw them in the woods-," You let your head fall into the palms of your hand. The old man was quick back on his feet, on his way over to you.
"Oh, honey," sighing out, but stopping as the heavy knocks on the door continued. With an annoyed huff, he rushed over to the door to pull it open.
"Get the fuck away from my RV!" Shouting at Shane, not even giving him a moment to answer as he smashed the door close again.
"I-I don't know what to do." You admitted in sobs, glancing up at the man as he got closer to you, making space to sit down next to you. A comforting arm found its way around your shoulder while his other hand rubbed your upper arm.
"That man doesn't deserve an angel like you," he whispered at you, hoping his calming voice would soothe your cries. "He clearly doesn't know what he lost with a stupid act like that."
"He proposed to me," you showed him the ring in desperation. "Only to cheat on me?"
"What can I tell ya, kid... young men are...," Dale sighed as he shook his head. "Dumb... and blind. They think they own the world."
You continued to sob in the man's arms. Listening to his soft voice as he spoke to you while you kept on your rambles of despair. Why Lori out of all people? You used to go out on double dates with your partners. You had known Rick Grimes for a good few years now. He was a good man. You had thought Lori was a good woman. But there she went, sleeping with an engaged man. The colleague, and best friend of her husband. Who may or may not be dead. Maybe Rick was gone, but you were still there. Only one partner of the cheating couple was widowed. The other part was still very much in a committed relationship. Or so you thought.
"W-What do I do now?" You wondered out loud. "How am I supposed to continue this?" Not necessarily talking about your relationship with Shane, but the situation altogether.
"You don't." Daryl's simple but straightforward answer made you look up. In the meantime, your sobs had quieted down again.
"What?"
"You tell him," he strictly told you. "You tell him what you saw. And you end it. Men like that... they don't change."
"God...," you fell back into the cushions behind you, running your hands down your face as you wiped the tears away. "Was I just... not good enough for him anymore? Why would he do something like this?"
"I wish I could tell ya, honey. But don't think that this has anythin' to do with you," Dale's stern voice made you glance at him. "Men like him don't think. You think he really thought of the possible consequences of his actions?"
You shrugged.
"He didn't. If he did, he wouldn't have done it. And men like don't deserve a second chance. Hell- they don't even deserve a first chance. But they're charming and whatnot, and before you know it, they're havin' their dicks in other women, breaking hearts of the ones that actually care about them."
You decided to stay quiet, letting his words sink in and register with you.
"You don't deserve that, honey."
Nodding your head, you took a deep breath in, wiping your nose. "I know..." With a sigh, you pushed yourself to stand up. "I have to talk to him."
"You sure, you wanna do that tonight?" The man carefully asked you, but you had already made up your mind, so you just continued to nod.
Quietly, you left the RV, of course not before Dale promised to set up a bed for you to stay in inside his movable home. You knew you had found the confidence to face your- Shane. Yet, your shaking legs and hands almost betrayed you. Realising, you didn't even truly think about how to start the conversation, the anxiety inside of you only started to bubble up more, hitting its highest point when you suddenly saw Shane exiting your tent.
His eyes fixed on you in the dark, finding your silhouette coming towards him thanks to the light shining through the RV's windows.
"Y/N-" he started, but you interrupted him right away.
"It's over."
Shane's eyebrows scrunched together. "What?"
"It's over," you repeated, finding your voice slightly shakier than you would've liked to. You glanced down your hands, almost mindlessly, wrapping your fingers around the gold band. Once, the sight of the shimmering ring on your finger made you smile, now it just shot another wave of sadness through your body. Almost shakingly, you took the last step, pulling the gold band off your finger, the metal leaving your skin, making you breathe out heavily.
"Hey- hey," the sheriff rushed closer to you, making you scoot back in reflex. "What the fuck are you doing?"
"What am I doing?" You spat at him, a salty chuckle tumbling from your lips. There was a slight change in expression on his face as he lifted his hands in defence.
"Listen-"
"No, you listen," you stopped him again. You didn't even let your brain think about what words were about to fall from your lips. "Don't even try-" You had to stop yourself, taking a deep breath in, trying to promise yourself not to cry in front of the man that you had lost so many nerves to.
"What the hell are you doing?" He continued to ask you, his frown only deepening.
But you just continued to shake your head, ignoring the anger starting to lace his voice. You had seen Shane angry before. Even angry at you. And it scared you. But right now, the anger, you were trying to hold back, should terrify everyone involved in this situation.
Taking a few steps closer to stop right in front of him, you lifted your hand that was still tightly holding onto the ring you had once worn and shown off proudly. Once Shane opened his palm underneath it, you let it drop down.
"It's over." Before he could ask you anything more, you left him with one last comment hanging in the air. "Have fun with Lori."
Turning around, you could hear his heavy huffs and the callouts of your name, yet he didn't even dare to try and reach out to you, leaving you to make your way back towards the RV. In the back, the sound of him knocking over some of the empty cans you had gathered, filled the silence. Up ahead, you found a silhouette standing still, almost scaring you if it wasn't for the distinct stance you were able to recognise immediately. The dim light illuminated Daryl's scowl as he had clearly watched the scene from a distance.
Arrived at the door of the vehicle, you wanted to at least send him a tight smile, a goodnight and somewhat of a thank you, but the archer had already disappeared again in his usual nature.
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I CAN‘T WAIT TO POST PART 2🙈🤗🥰 I loved writing this so much omg
this is me officially stating I'm writing for the man that is Daryl Dixon now too :)
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tainsan · 11 months
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misfits: II (college!ateez x reader)
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{a/n: thank you so so so much for the support just after the first chapter! i am so grateful for all of you who have been reblogging and sending in feedback}
do not steal my work or repost on places other than tumblr.
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-----THIS IS AN 18+ FANFICTION MINORS DO NOT INTERACT-----
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warnings: not really anything, just a little bit of swearing.
word count: 6.2k
“No radius is half of the diameter; did you not pay attention in high school?” You say exasperated, half laughing half scowling at the black-haired male situated in front of you.
“I was too busy denying my sexuality in high school,” Minho says rolling his eyes, causing a boisterous laugh to erupt from your throat.
“You do know you’re not supposed to be here?” 
Minho snuck into your advanced calculus class earlier saying he was bored, and Jisung was in a Finance class, where the teacher isn't too keen on letting random students into his lectures. Luckily you were close to the end of the lesson, meaning your professor was partially done, letting students talk among themselves whilst he does God knows what on his computer. 
“It’s not like any of our professors remember our faces. I think I’ve had Bartley for three years in a row and he still thinks I’m a freshman.”
You snort at his remark knowing he has a point. The teachers don't get paid enough to remember every student anyways.
“You need to study more, how are you going to open your own business if you don't know the basics of math?” you question, joking slightly.
“I have you for that. Plus, it’s not like I want to become one of those smart-ass CEOs, I just want to open a nice dance studio far away from this goofy place.”
“That’s still a business Min, and it would help to know math so you can at least calculate your revenue.” 
“Yeah, but I don't need to know the radius of a circle for that,” he once again rolls his eyes mockingly, causing a chuckle to emit from you.
“Touché Lee.” 
Minho winks at you cheekily, then looks at his phone that had just vibrated notifying a message. His eyes widen hugely, causing your curiosity to spike.
“Girl, not to alarm you but Bin said there’s someone looking for you.”
“Why would that alarm me?” 
Before Minho can get another word out, the large wooden door to the entrance opens widely, and in walks a guy wearing all black, glasses perched across his nose. The entire room goes silent, and you swear you can hear your own heartbeat. Leaning towards Minho slightly, you mean to ask why it has gone so silent all of a sudden, but you cannot get the question out as the man in black soundlessly makes his way toward where you and Minho are situated, walking up the stairs. 
“__, right?” the nameless man asks as he reaches you, his voice breaking the thick silence in the room. Immediately, whispers sound across the room from almost everyone. Starting to feel self-conscious of the sudden attention on you, the familiar feeling of a heavy heart residing in your chest. You momentarily wonder why he even asked for your name if he knew who to go to in a class with over thirty students.
“Come with me?” The request is said as a question yet the tone he uses is harsh and demanding, as if he is not giving you a choice to say no. 
You look at Minho, confused yet you see the same confused expression on his face, yet the look is definitely more prominent on his. You probably would have laughed at the expression on your friend's face if it were in a different circumstance.  
“Okay let’s go,” Minho says, helping you grab your books off the desk. 
“I wasn't talking to you,” The guy says slightly rudely, looking at Minho with a piercing cold glare. Minho, looking offended starts to stand up, puffing his shoulders and advancing slightly towards the man in black. Chattering and whispers spur around the class, someone even gasping audibly.
“Minho, it’s fine, just wait here.” You grab his hand and pull him back to his sitting position gently. The small action not going unnoticed by the mysterious man, who looks between the two of you, almost as if he is analyzing the situation. As you stand up, the man dressed in black heads for the exit, not sharing a glance with anyone who ogles at him. 
‘Goofy ass’ you mumble under your breath as you start your walk towards the exit. Not missing the way countless eyes are on your form, you trudge out of the door, feeling overwhelmed by the sudden interest in you. You ponder in your head why on Earth this man has so much attention all of a sudden like he is a celebrity or something. Rapidly closing the door, you rest your eyes and take a deep breath to calm your racing heart, you rest against the closed door behind you, breathing steadily you slowly feel your nerves go down. You open your eyes when you’re ready and see the strange man to your right, resting his left side against the wall body turned towards you. Quickly, you scurry to gain your composure and turn towards the man watching your movements like an eagle. He has a sharp nose and high cheekbones, his gaze intimidating. If you weren’t so confused, you would probably think he was very handsome.
“So, uh what did you want?” you question, cringing at your scratchy voice due to a dry throat. Almost scoffing, the man rolls his eyes and passes you a water bottle that was conveniently resting in his hand. 
“Um, thanks.” You say, feeling the heat rise up your neck.
“You need a place to live right?” He says bluntly, staring at you whilst you take a swig of water. Almost choking on said water, you bring your hand to your mouth and try to keep the water from coming out. Why does this random stranger know your life? 
“I’m sorry, I don't know who you are, how do you know I need a place to live?” you reply when your mouth is free of liquid. For some reason, the tenseness on the man’s shoulders seems to loosen a little, almost as if he is relieved and you don’t fail to notice the slight change in his behavior.
“I’m friends with San and Jongho, they told me you lost your apartment.” 
You are hit with a realization, and then things seem much clearer, without you knowing a smile comes to your face thinking of the two sweet people you had tutored a few days ago. This smile does not go unnoticed by the male opposite you; he even feels somewhat happy you are smiling whilst thinking of his friends, not scowling or cowering like other people would do.
“Um, I’m Hongjoong, I was wondering if you maybe wanted to uh have a look at our place, we have a room open.” Hongjoong introduces himself, stumbling on his words, you recognise his name, yet you have no idea where from. It seems a stark contrast to the scary image he was showing less than thirty seconds ago, now he is nervous and fairly restless, fiddling with the rings on his fingers and unable to make eye contact for more than three seconds. Feeling hopeful about finding a new place, your mood perks up immensely.
“Seriously?” you inquire, a hopeful smile adoring your features. Hongjoong seems to look surprised at your reaction, his cheeks turning a light shade of pink and his eyes widening, quickly he coughs and continues the cold expression on his face. 
“But wait…” you trail off, remembering the whereabouts of their accommodation, “as much as it would help, you guys live in the richest area near here, and I would never be able to afford it.” your eyes droop as you look at the floor, upset that you yet again have to go on dormfinder.com for an affordable place to live.
“We are more than happy to pull some strings, I’m close to the landlord.” His words are still calm, but this time rushed. 
“I really appreciate the offer, Hongjoong. I just don't see myself living there, even if you were to pull strings, my student loans barely cover the school funds let alone a place in Eastwood.” 
“Your parents do not offer help?” Your breath catches in your throat, and you feel your eyes start to sting, which does not go unnoticed by the male. 
“It’s just me.” You reply, your voice sharp. Seeing Hongjoong flinch slightly at your sudden harsh tone, you are quick to apologise. 
“Maybe you could just have a look?” Hongjoong’s eyes stay hopeful as he peers down at you. The height difference isn't huge but still to the point where you have to lift your head slightly to meet his callous eyes.
“Look I don’t have time to be browsing through places that are out of my league, I truly appreciate it Hongjoong, but I just can’t.”
“My mother is the landlord, I already spoke to her about it and she’s happy with you staying for five hundred a month, as long as you are clean and keep the house in order.” 
His words take you aback. Four hundred was the price you were paying for your old place, it’s not cheap but it's still a good price, especially for such an amazing place. Yet you are more taken aback by the fact he has already consulted with his mother. Was he so certain you were going to say yes that he already made a deal?
“I thought rent there was at least six thousand, what’s the big catch?” You are interested but keep your hopes low, you don't want to get ahead of yourself and potentially harm your heart.
“My roommates can be, well um messy, loud, and a little overbearing.” Hongjoong admits he sees your brow furrow slightly, “But we are friendly, fun, we will respect your space and never make you feel uncomfortable.” He rushes on his words again, almost as if he’s trying to sell a product. “It’s a lovely place trust me.”
“Who do you live with?” You inquire, if you want to even think about moving in you need to know who your roommates would be. 
“Are you familiar with Ateez?” Hongjoong is slow and cautious with his words as if he is treading on thin ice. Your eyes widen, and you feel your heart start to race again. Hongjoong is quick to notice this and waves his hands in front of you, dismissing what he just said. Even though you may have had good experiences with the men you know as Ateez members, you don’t know if you could get involved with them after what you've heard about them. Not knowing if you can trust them, you are hesitant to accept the offer. But then again, rumors are deadly but mostly not true. You know that better than anyone.
“We aren't as bad as people perceive us; I swear.” 
Now this confuses you even further. Hongjoong is another person in Ateez? Part of you believes his words, yet part of you believes your best friend. They are a selfish, cold, heartless group with no care for others' feelings. Even the way Hongjoong is presenting himself is on character, even whilst offering you the deal of your lifetime, his image is scary and cold, his words nothing more than blunt and harsh. But then again, your encounters with the rest have so far been so different and confusing. The way Hongjoong is quick to convince you that they aren’t bad people, or at least as bad as people say, leads to being even more baffled.
“No, I wasn't thinking that I was just honestly confused why you guys would ever let anyone who isn't a part of your group live with you. Why are you even doing this in the first place?” 
It takes a moment for Hongjoong to reply, your words hovering around the both of you. You can almost see the cogs turning in his head as he processes his answer. Looking as if he is debating whether or not to answer, he looks at you and then around him, looking to see if anyone is watching.  Slowly, he decides to answer, his sharp, cold image melting away.
Hongjoong takes a swift step closer to you, his breath fanning against your face as you look up at him. Heart pounding like it’s about to explode, the sudden closeness between our two bodies makes you small, only about a foot separating him from colliding with your tense form. His eyes are a harsh contrast to the cold, lifeless expression he previously held up, now they are soft, and kind and you feel your body loosen up as you get lost in the warm gaze of his deep brown eyes. His eyes feel so frequent as if you’ve stared into them before.
“You were the only one ever who was truly kind to us. Please, just have a look, ___,” his voice is no more than a mere whisper and you can feel your heart in your throat. Never having someone this close to you, speaking so softly, is new and you aren't sure if you like it or not. The look in Hongjoong’s eyes both comforts and unnerves you. Before you can even register what has happened, his body is back in the same position as previously, his cheeks turning red and momentarily regretting his sudden uncontrolled actions. 
“I'll tell San to message you the address,” Hongjoong’s cold stare is back as he departs toward the general exit of the building, leaving you to fan your face and take deep breaths to calm the pounding of your heart. Glancing down at the water bottle in your hand, you are now even more confused than you were at the beginning of the week.
What the fuck?
----
Laying on your back, facing the ceiling, millions of thoughts run through your head as you try to decide. Next to you resides your phone, lighting up the dim room, with the messenger app open. Sighing, you pick your phone up one more time to reread through the message for the nth time.
‘Hey, here’s the address for our place. San’
Peering at the profile picture of the contact, the corners of your mouth turn up as you see a cute photo of the animated character Kuromi sleeping. It actually suits San well. You remember when you were with him at the library when he saw your phone case of the Sanrio characters. It seems funny that he has the same characters as his profile picture now. Curiously looking at his profile, you see, the picture was changed six days ago. Just after your tutoring session, it’s probably just a coincidence. As you’re staring at the picture and getting lost in your thoughts, another message notification appears on the top of your screen. This time, it's from Yeji. 
‘hi girl, I really don’t want to rush you but my new roommate is moving in tomorrow, you can maybe sleep on the sofa for the time being but you really need to find a place, my landlord isn't happy about you living here rent-free.’
Groaning, you throw your phone down against your bed once again, bringing your hands up to your eyes to wipe away the stinging sensation rising in them, your stomach feeling uneasy from this whole situation. Every free hour and minute you have, you have been searching for cheap apartments close to the school, yet the only one that you even managed to find was almost twenty miles away and you do not feel like using public transport at ungodly hours in the morning. 
Glancing at your phone once again, you feel conflicted in your head. You know that the boys you have met of Ateez wouldn’t be mad at you for not showing up, yet you feel like you are obligated to. Yes, the place is cheap and only about a ten-minute walk from campus and a fifteen-minute walk to Jisung’s. But it's the idea of living with the Ateez that spooks you a little bit, not really knowing what their true identity is. ‘Fuck it’ you think, what have you got to lose. Throwing yourself off the empty bed, you rush to the suitcase of your clothes to find something somewhat presentable to wear. Settling on one of the three outfits you now have, due to the rest being burnt to a crisp, you pull it on and hope that it at least looks good to them. ‘Why do I care what they think?’ you suddenly think to yourself, not wanting to have to worry about impressing them with your looks. Hurriedly grabbing your necessary belongings, you bolt out of the door, excited and both nervous. You just hope the entire group isn't there to analyse you.
----
Strolling through the long street full of large white brick houses, you feel exceptionally out of place in this insanely rich area. You’re not even sure how you ended up here in the first place and you just know Jisung would smack you if he saw where you were heading. Maybe it was the impression Hongjoong left on you, you still see his warm brown eyes whenever you close your eyes, his soft expression as he moved closer to your body. The way he spoke so softly and tenderly. You haven't even begun to unpack what he said, not knowing what he meant by you were the only one kind to them. Maybe you unknowingly lent them a pen in class? That doesn’t seem like a big enough gesture for them to invite you to literally live with them. Maybe Hongjoong likes you, you think to your self grinning giddily. Smacking your head gently, you remove the grin from your face and try to divert your thoughts from the handsome man, realizing he would never like you like that, let alone want to be your friend. Looking for the number 2410, you scan the houses as you walk from place to place. They are all beautiful detached houses with a large porches. Before you know it, you see the large number appear in front of you, the house seeming much more intimidating than the others, perhaps it's because you know who lives there and who is potentially inside. The walls of the house are white, the roof light blue, with large windows adorning the front and sides. Walking up the driveway and towards the porch, your heart gets heavy with anxiety, realizing the situation you are about to get yourself into. I just hope none of them pull a stunt like Hongjoong did, anything is better than getting your heart swooned again by another handsome male, which just so happens to be all of them so far, fuck. You really don’t have time to be falling for the ‘bad boys’ right now. Surely they won’t get angry at you if you show up and say no to the offer, right?
Reaching the front door, you hesitate to ring the doorbell, your heart attempting to jump out of your throat. When your finger reaches the button, a loud, long ringing noise is heard within the walls of the home, which breaks you out of your semi-unconscious thinking state. You step back slightly, to make sure you’re not right next to the door when it opens, not wanting to be up in the face of the person who opens it if they open the door. Gripping onto the strap of your tote bag for dear life, you silently hope that there is nobody home, but then hope there is someone home, then hope there is not. You heavily debated at this moment whether you should just run away from the door and pretend it was some kid ding dong ditching. Moving away slightly, you get ready to run for your life, when all of a sudden your hopes are shattered and you hear the click of the lock signaling the door to be opened, and you’re met with the top of someone’s head, clearly, he’s more interested with whatever video is playing on his phone.
“Unless you’re selling some of those delicious red velvet cookies, can you kindly piss off, please and thank you.” The door goes to close, yet you quickly stop it by speaking out, causing the man to halt his actions.
“I don't have red velvet cookies, but I could maybe bring you a nice red velvet muffin,” you joke, realising the man behind the door is Wooyoung. Snapping his head up, Wooyoung's ice-cold facade melts away within an instant, being replaced with the same warm smile you saw a few days ago. He can’t believe you actually showed up at the house after waiting for what felt like ages.
“Muffin?” he is surprised to see you, “I was starting to think you weren’t going to show up, again,” Wooyoung admits as he opens the door fully, letting you enter. Still not used to the nickname, your heart speeds up ever so slightly.
“Better late than never, right?” You reply bashfully, feeling sorry for coming so late.
“True,” Wooyoung helps you take off your coat and for a moment your heart stops when you feel his warm hands brush against your shoulders, not knowing the way the man helping you feels as he contacts your skin. You mutter a thank you as you take off your shoes, ignoring the way your skin burns upon touch with the man. 
“Sang! She’s here!” Wooyoung yells up the tall stairs placed near the entrance of the house. Suddenly, you hear a clunking coming from upstairs, followed by some banging and shuffling. Then you see a head of white hair pop his head over the top of the staircase, his face is red and hair messy.
“Uh give me one second,” he then disappears and more shuffling and banging sounds are heard. Turning to look at Wooyoung with a confused look on your face, he just shrugs with an amused expression.
“We don't usually have visitors; he’s likely just cleaning all the shit off the floor.”
You nod in recognition, your lips turning up slightly at Yeosang’s rushed, cute actions, knowing all too well what it’s like to have unanticipated visitors.
“Would you like something to drink?” Wooyoung asks you as you both walk further into the house; he opens a door leading to a grand kitchen that looks like it's made for celebrity chefs. 
“Whoa this kitchen is insane,” You stare at it in awe, walking towards the marble top counters, running your hand over the cool material.
“I love it here, I can make all the food my heart desires here,” Wooyoung admits, walking towards where you're standing. You are slightly taken aback to know that Wooyoung likes to cook, but then you remember the amazing muffin he made for you a few days ago and you realise, yes, he is a good cook. Reaching behind you, he opens a cupboard full of glasses, grabbing two he places it next to the large American fridge freezer. 
“No drink?” he asks one more time.
“Oh, I’m sorry, just a water would be nice,” you reply, slightly bashful. Wooyoung’s heart speeds up at the sight of your flustered expression. Grinning at you slightly, Wooyoung then turns around to open the fridge. It's then you hear the banging of someone descending the stairs, rather quickly you notice too. When you turn around you see a red-faced Yeosang, smiling lightly at you. Happily, you return his smile, saying hello to him, to which he replies. He is not the only one who can’t believe you’re standing in their house, finally. Wooyoung hands you a glass of cold water and you thank him. Making his way towards the kitchen island, Yeosang takes a seat at one of the barstools placed around it.
“For a house with eight roommates, it sure is quiet here.” You admit, taking a sip of your water, surprised by the serenity of the place, the only banging coming from Yeosang a few minutes ago. Wooyoung lets out a laugh and Yeosang smiles to himself.
“It’s just us home right now, everyone else is finishing their last lectures of the day or doing homework in the library. Yeosang and I finished early because our dance professor got the flu.”
“You guys are taking dance?” You question, your curiosity getting the best of you, you know Minho and Felix are taking dance too, however, they have never mentioned the two males before, maybe you have to ask them later about it. From this question, the two males’ chests fill with joy knowing they have your interest, even if it’s only for a split second.
Yeosang smiles and answers, “Yeah, we are.” 
“Now you really don’t know anything about us, do you?” Wooyoung says, also curious, “Not to sound narcissistic but I thought almost everyone knows what course we are taking, kinda comes with being the group everyone talks about,” 
Chuckling slightly, you answer, “Like I already said to Yeosang, I kind of live under a rock, I didn't even know about Ateez until like a few weeks ago, and even then, I didn't really care. No offense of course.” 
“None was taken,” Yeosang says, his hand tapping on the island, his eyes watching you intently. Smiling at him once again when you make eye contact, you decide to take a seat on the island too. Choosing the one closest to you, you sit down and are pleasantly surprised by the comfort of the small stool.  
“Which dances do you prefer, like hip hop, ballroom, jazz, or contemporary?” You ask the two males, too curious to not ask some questions, the men look at you incredulously and are taken aback by your question. “What has no one ever asked you that before?” you add, confused by the reaction of the two.
Wooyoung stands on the opposite side of the island, resting against the counter behind him, “Not really, people usually just ask for us to dance for them, dance with them, do a sexy dance, you name it, I don't think anyone has ever actually been interested in the sort of technical stuff, except for maybe our parents.” Yeosang nods to his statement and you start to feel somewhat upset no one has taken the time to actually take interest in their likings, or attempt to know them better. It isn't hard to ask someone what their favorite dance is.
“My mother used to be a dancer, I used to watch her dance all the time when I was younger. I’m interested because it kind of reminds me of her. Plus, it’s much cooler than asking someone to sexy dance for you,” You admit, smiling fondly at the memories of your mother dancing in the living room late at night with your brother hobbling along trying to keep up with her pace, even though he was tired he still moved along with her, wanting to have fun with her. Wooyoung and Yeosang feel extremely happy you care about their dancing in a way not many people do, asking them a question to know them better, and for sharing something personal about yourself. 
“We mostly do hip hop, but Wooyoung is into contemporary these days,” Yeosang answers you, his soft smile not leaving his features whilst he talks. It feels like it's been ages since he’s truly smiled at someone other than his seven friends.
“That’s so cool!” You exclaim loudly, “I wish I could dance but I’ve got similar to the rhythm of an elephant.” Hearing Wooyoung and Yeosang laugh heartily at your comment, your heart swells in your chest, an unfamiliar feeling arriving deep in your heart.
“You’d be surprised, apparently elephants are really good at following a beat,” Wooyoung says, grinning at you from across the counter, sending a small wink in your direction.
“I'll take your word for it, but it doesn't mean you're going to find me in the dance studio any time soon, mark my words.” You joke and laugh together with the two other men, a comfortable silence falling over you.
“As much as we’d love you to be here for dinner, you’re here to look at the house, right?” Wooyoung is the first to break the silence, not wanting you to leave the comfortable space just created, but knowing he has a duty to fulfill. 
“Yes, but it doesn't mean I’m going to take the offer, I just needed to see what there is, you know?” 
Wooyoung and Yeosang’s shoulders droop slightly hearing your comment, upset that even though you’ve come here, you might not take the other. Yeosang is the first to gain his composure, clearing his throat and continuing the conversation in case you notice the small dip in their behavior.
“So do you want to see around?” 
“I’d love to.”
They first take you upstairs, there is a long hallway with eight doors placed along the walls, and you can’t help but wonder how they managed to fit so many rooms. Wooyoung explains each room, showing you inside the two bathrooms that are both equipped with a sizable shower and large bath in the corner, each with a toilet and sink. They do not go into the six bedrooms explaining that their roommates would prefer not to show up without their permission. This causes you to smile to yourself, realizing that they do indeed have respect for people’s boundaries even when they aren't around. However, you can’t help but wonder how each of their rooms differs, how they have decorated them, and how clean they are. When Wooyoung reaches the end of the hallway, you see there are two doors that haven’t been explained yet. 
“These are mine and Yeosang’s rooms,” Wooyoung clarifies and you nod in realisation. The two doors face each other and you laugh mentally, knowing that the two men are close friends so of course their rooms are right next to each other. You expect Wooyoung to move on to the next part of the house just like he has done with every other room, yet when he doesn’t you are surprised. Opening the door he just signified was his room he lets you have a peek in and you suddenly feel grateful that he is sharing something so personal with you. It is a rather plain bedroom, with a large bed in the corner, the bed sheets a dark blue colour, and a bedside table next to it. At the foot of the bed on the opposite side of the wall, is a sizable desk with a monitor screen and a pc. There is a big wardrobe on the other side of the room also. You don’t notice much except for the fact it is very clean and how the bed is much bigger than a regular bed. You also notice a picture frame on his bedside table, you can’t see much of the photo, but it seems awfully familiar for some reason, feeling like you’ve seen it before, you stare at it probably a little longer than you should have.
“That’s my room, just so you know if you accidentally walk into it.” Wooyoung beams at you, closing the door. He momentarily feels insecure by your peering eyes analysing his room, hoping you liked it.
“This is the first time I’ve ever seen your room tidy,” Yeosang says nonchalantly, though you can see the teasing grin tugging at his features. Wooyoung’s ears go red as he gently smacks the blonde-haired male.
“How about you show your room too then?”
Immediately, the grin on Yeosang’s face disappears, replaced with a bewildered and taken aback look. Wooyoung sticks his tongue out at him soon after, walking towards the stairs and shaking his head slightly. Laughing softly at the twos bickering, you follow Wooyoung to the stairway and descend down the wide staircase. When downstairs, Wooyoung walks past the kitchen again, and into a different room which seems to be the dining room. In the dining room, there is a large table with four chairs on each side of it. In the center is a bowl of apples, bananas, and pears. The room is rather plain but still feels cozy. Next, the two lead you to the living room which is rather large. There is an enormous U-shaped couch placed against the wall, and a coffee table in the centre, the couch faces a television standing on a display that has shelves full of DVDs. You are impressed again at how clean it is and mentally make a note to check out the movies they have and also to rest on the couch, wishing to see if it is as comfortable as it looks. Strolling back to the hallway, you notice two doors that you didn’t realise were there when you first walked into the house. Yeosang is in the lead as the opens the door, which has some stairs going downwards to some sort of basement. This makes you stop in your tracks immediately and thoughts race through your head.
“Okay not to be rude but I’ve watched enough horror movies to know you never go into someone’s basement when it’s your first time being in their house.” You admit, not too excited to go into the basement of some people you don’t know too well. Wooyoung lets out a boisterous laugh whilst Yeosang is having a hard time keeping his chuckles in. They don't care that you don't want to go down, knowing that it’s smart to not give your trust to them straight away, even if they really want to gain it.
“That’s okay, for another time then, all we have done with the place is put some beanbags and a projector for when we want to have a movie night,” Yeosang speaks out, explaining why they wanted to show you. They aren’t offended at you, understanding why you have your doubts. You nod in consideration; always loving movie nights make you add another pro to why you should potentially take the offer. Closing the door, Yeosang leads you back to the kitchen and around a corner where three more white doors are placed. Two face each other whilst one faces towards the kitchen, almost similar to a u shape. 
“These are more bedrooms, these ones have en suites so there’s no need for an extra toilet downstairs,” Yeosang explains. You briefly remember the door near the entrance of the house, next to the basement, which Wooyoung pointed out as the communal toilet.
“These are Yunho’s and Seonghwa’s bedrooms, and this door is um…” Wooyoung trails off. You notice the way Wooyoung and Yeosang both seem to get somewhat nervous, he continues, “If you were to move here this would be your room,”
You find it somewhat annoying that if you were to move in, you’d be residing next to the two males you have yet to meet. But then again it would give you a chance to get to know them better.
Both Wooyoung and Yeosang have hearts full of hope as you open the door to move inside the room. The room is plain, with nothing but a bed, wardrobe, and desk with no objects on either. You are pleasantly shocked by the size of the room, it’s big but not huge, the perfect size for you to make it into a cozy bedroom. One thing that does stun you though, is the size of the bed. It’s almost the same size as Wooyoung’s, definitely big enough to fit more than three people. Maybe they just all like big beds? One thing you can’t deny is how comfortable it looks. Another thing that confuses you is that there are sheets on it, looking as if someone has slept in it recently, which baffles you a little bit. There is indeed a door inside the room that leads to a stunning bathroom, with a huge shower, this makes you beam, not having to worry about awkward encounters with any of the boys when sharing a bathroom.
“So, what do you think?” Yeosang is the first to break the silence, his voice echoing through the empty space. Both the males are unknowingly looking at you with large, hopeful eyes. 
Peering around the room, turning in a circle
“It’s amazing,” you begin, causing the two to hold on their breaths, full of hope, you continue, “But are you sure it’s okay I live here, five hundred doesn’t seem real to me?”
Immediately Wooyoung and Yeosang jump into action with their words.
“Yes of course! Joong said he pulled strings and so has Seonghwa.” Yeosang stutters out, his voice louder than you’ve ever heard it. This makes you baffled as to why two strangers would pull such strings for you, knowing their reputation it seems rather peculiar for them to act in such ways for someone they have never met before. It seems weird to you that they would even think of helping you, let alone pulling so many extreme strings to ensure you a place to live. Perhaps they aren't as bad as people make them out to be, perhaps they are just huge sweethearts.
You stay silent for about two minutes, contemplating all the options in your head. Little do you know how much the silence pains the two men in front of you, wishing they could read your mind. After one more silent and dreadful moment, you decide to give your answer. 
“I’m sorry, I just can’t…”
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comicaurora · 5 months
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Hi! I finally got the chance to read Aurora a bit ago. It's a wonderful story--all I was expecting and better! I was particularly amazed and delighted by the artwork and visual mechanics used to tell the story, so I wrote a post to yell about how cool it is and break some of it down. (No criticism, just praise.) I'm mostly a hobbyist, so I'm hoping I've done it justice.
That said: zero pressure to read it or respond to this ask. Normally I wouldn't send it since I tagged, but I know Tumblr's notifs are a mess and things get lost very easily. I've been in both the "one (1) word of praise will feed me for a year" and the "oh gods don't talk about my writing/art because anything that seems Off will break my brain" modes before, and I absolutely don't want to push or make you uncomfortable!
If you are comfortable, however, I wanted to ask about your use of what I'm assuming are Screen and blending modes in sound effect words. (I'm only guessing that's the technique, though, so I could be totally wrong about how it's done! I'm mostly experienced in image manipulation in Photoshop.) Making them semi-transparent over the actions is genius :) What inspired you to do that, and are there specific techniques you use to make it work?
Same questions go for using specific colors to distinguish different characters' words and actions. I really noticed it in the cave sequence with Falst and Dainix, since their colors are so vivid in the dark (ex. Falst's little swats and Dainix's swooping kick at 1.20.9). It lends excellent clarity to busy scenes.
Thanks! Have a lovely day, enjoy your break, and happy holidays <3
You're correct about the technique! "Screen" is the blend mode I use most often for sound effects. I stumbled on it mostly through trial and error - I love how sound effects add depth to a comic panel, but it's very easy for them to obscure the art in a way I find counterproductive, so "Screen" lets me put the sound effect directly over the origin of the sound while still letting it be visible through the word. Early chapters didn't have it as much-
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Most of the sound effects in early chapters are just solid colors with reduced opacity if I'm feeling fancy. But I started figuring it out around chapter 8 and 9, because Falst is kind of a sound-effect-heavy guy, especially in his fight scenes.
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In order to make sure they don't impede the visibility of the action, I'll often soft-erase the top or bottom half of the SFX to reduce its opacity while still leaving it readable.
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I'll usually double that up with an outline on the SFX so it's still readable. This is an especially important consideration if the SFX goes over an area of the background that's very bright or glowing.
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Color-coding the speed lines and SFX to the character or force causing them isn't a hard and fast rule, but I like using it (in part because it's a habit from the OSP illustrations, where every character has a single pop of color in their lineart) mostly because it sort of codes every sound to make it clear where it's emanating from, or the general feeling of the sound. Since I normally do character-colors for SFX, something like this stands out more jarringly-
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Which it's supposed to, but a big lightning strike doesn't register as anything too worrying because it's just Tess up to her usual shenanigans.
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It's also very useful for magic effects, because each form of magic has its own associated palette.
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And when I had a very complicated fight scene in a dark environment, I used the texture pattern I'd already made for the monster to color its SFX, so when I Screened them onto the panels they didn't obscure too much while still communicating "this is something else."
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Changing the weight, lined-vs-not-lined, and opacity of the SFX words also helps to communicate that not every sound has the same feeling. A strong motion is solid and aggressive, but a crackling, unstable sound is more ephemeral and staticky.
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It's definitely been a process of learning as I go - looking back at the earlier chapters I can actually see when I first tried various tricks I now use regularly, like doubling and distorting an SFX to produce the effect of a camera-shaking impact. I haven't really seen any other comics that do it like I do, probably because most other comics follow a more traditional production pipeline where text bubbles and sound effects get locked into the composition early, before the inking stage, because traditional physical comics don't have digital-art layers to play with. Adding sound effects to a page is almost the last thing I do before exporting them, and that only works because digital art and layers allow for a ton of flexibility.
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arisuworld · 10 months
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| CLEARING SOME DOUBTS + MOTIVATION FOR VOID AND MANIFESTATION |
DISCLAIMERS:
1. Strong language (i swear a lot), sarcasm ahead, tough love typa shit. This is meant to be helpful and reassuring but I'm not going to treat y'all like you're made of sugar and talk like I'm from 50 years ago. Deal with it or not.
2. English is not my first language. So, there can be many grammatical mistakes.
So, lately I see a lot of people questioning law of assumption and void like "is this even real?" "I saw this post on reddit and they say manifestation is not real" "void isn't real, it never worked for me"
well guys, rather than sending hundreds asks to bloggers, just try to manifest once in your life? It's not like you're doing this for someone else. You're doing this for YOU, for YOUR OWN SELF. THEN WHY THE PROCRASTINATION?
Secondly, use your own fcking mind okay? Why do you even listen to people who are judgemental and just always shittin around? Do what benefits you!! If reddit doesn't benefit you then delete it.
Thirdly, VOID IS REAL!! 100% tested and proven by hundreds and thousands people but you still chose to believe one of those who don't believe in void. Great, right? Also, just because you failed to enter void once or twice doesn't declares that 'void isn't real'. It's okay to doubt after a failure, it's human nature but get your shit together alright? Get right back on track because IF YOU WON'T, THEN WHO WILL DO IT FOR YOU? Only you can change your life girlie!!
Now, look this is on you. If you want to have your dream life, you can have it right now but you choose to waste your time reading anonymous's success stories rather than making your own. Why don't you take it upon yourself? AND JUST DO IT? WHY NOT? IF THEY CAN THEN WHY CAN'T YOU? WHAT'S STOPPING YOU? The method is not the problem, swallowing or staying still is not the problem. It's you!! If only you could have some faith in yourself, then you would be living your dream life rather than crying over your shitty life right now. Believe me or not, but only you can change your life. ONLY YOU! No one will do it for you, not even your favourite goddess blogger. (Also, they have their own personal life so please stop spamming asks and disturbing them with your stupid annoying questions which has been already answered millions times. Yes, they've been answered millions times!!!)
All you have to do is change your mindset , affirm and get that dream life. THEN WHAT'S STOPPING YOU FOR FCKS SAKE? YOU CAN'T EVEN DO THAT MUCH? IT'S JUST SO EASY. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO OVER COMPLICATE IT? Manifesting is just like breathing = Natural, easy and effortless. But you still choose to over complicate it and then be like "Why it's not working, pls help" Listen gurl, the bloggers don't know what is going through your head 24/7, only you do. Only you can point out your own mistakes and work on your self concept.
I mean I get it, really. Your whole life, you've been told that ONLY hard work can make you achieve great things but suddenly you get to know that you're the god of the reality and that you can get THAT BIG ASS MANSION, MERCEDES AND KIM TAEHYUNG IN YOUR ARMS JUST BY AFFIRMING. Yes it's hard to believe sometimes but shouldn't you be happy? That all you have to do is sit back and relax. Shouldn't you be happy that you don't have to work 24/7 to earn good money? SHOULDN'T YOU BE HAPPY THAT ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS JUST CHILL?? Yes, you should be but you silly goose choose to procrastinate.
"The cost of procrastination is THE LIFE YOU COULD'VE LIVED" (LET THAT SINK IN)
So what are you even waiting for? You already know how void and law of assumption works then why are you lurking on Tumblr 24/7? Why don't you take a break and show up on Tumblr with your own success story? Just go and get THAT LIFE BABY. TRUST ME IT'S SO EASY. Once you get it, you'll understand how stupid you were to procrastinate.
So the conclusion is, chill and relax babe and get that dream life. It's just so easy. You don't need to stress over it. It's just so fun and effortless. You can have a great journey ahead but only if you put some efforts in. i Hope to see y'all spamming some good ass success stories, alright? Good luck y'all <3
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winchester-reload · 8 months
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Directions: Fill each prompt ON or After each day listed (the 1st-15th of October, then again on the 31st for our bonus day), then post it on your desired social media platform using tag #suptober23. Be sure to include which prompt you're fulfilling in each post. You can write, you can make art. You can do both! You decide. Rules: All posts must be Supernatural-themed. Like, comment, and reblog others' posts. No hate will be tolerated, including actor hate. NO AI. Do not throw a photo in a Photoshop filter and post it as art. Challenge yourself to create. Noncon, incest, and hate will not be reblogged.
To include your work in the Suptober 2023 archive, you must ALSO post it to the collection in Ao3!
In previous years, I've worked diligently to reblog each and every post listed in the tag to include in an archive on tumblr. However, more than a few things have changed in the past six years, including my earlier creeping bedtime. This year, I'd like to move the archive to Ao3 for something more inclusive. That means this year, it's up to you to get your work in there! Authors: be sure to use tags so your stories are searchable! * Artists: mind ao3's rules for images. You may choose to include a clickable link instead of the art itself.
Posting starts October 1st, 2023.
Special thank you to my friends over on Patreon for their help with this year's list! Truly without them, this would not be happening. Consider joining to help support more events like this! For a text copy of the prompts go here! Join the Discord
FAQ's
Why aren't there 31 prompts this year? Because I'm changing it up to something a little less overwhelming for you and me. Fill all the days, and if you're still hungry for more, send me a message and let me know it wasn't enough so I can take that into account for next year!
I posted my work and you haven't reblogged it. What did I do wrong? Probably nothing. I may have just missed it, which will happen. The good news is, it's up to you to include your work in an archive this year, so be sure to do that! Also be sure to tag it correctly using #suptober23, and the day you're fulfilling.
I'm really busy in October, can I post it later? Yes! The collection won't close.
I can't write or draw, is there another way I can participate? Yes, you can support all the creators by liking, commenting, and reblogging their work. It's just as important as the things being posted. Also, I bet you'll soon realize you absolute can make art and write too! There's no skill level required to have fun.
How long do the stories need to be? There's no word length just be sure to make a good effort, and challenge yourself.
Can I include multiple days in one fic? Sure, but don't post early, and be sure to tag for each day both here on tumblr (if you're posting to tumblr) and on Ao3. In the past, people have used each prompt as a new chapter, and that works great for a cohesive project!
Can I repost the prompt list with my posts? Yep. Go ham. Use at will.
More questions for me? Send me an ask!
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