#nat talks the swifts | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

arlana-likes-to-write · 1 month

Note

Can you do a Natasha x fem Reader based off wildest dreams by Taylor Swift? The idea I had was something like R and Nat having feelings for each other and then end up kissing or something a one of Tony’s (Tony is R’s dad) parties. They end up have a secret relationship because R is scared to come out to the team and especially her dad. But they end getting caught by Thor who accidentally tells Tony and the team at a dinner or something. But there’s a happy ending

Note: I do apologize but I kind of changed the ending on this but I do hope you enjoy it.

Warning: secret relationship, reader is closeted for the beginning, kissing, angst with a happy ending, drinking, self-doubt, miscommunication

Relationships: Natasha x Stark!Reader, Tony x Pepper x Reader (platonic)

If there was one thing about your father, he could throw a party, and most of the time, you had no idea why a party was happening. You knew the team returned from a mission. They saved the day, were the heroes, and now they were drinking and partying. All expect Natasha Romanoff. The Black Widow was nursing a Long Island iced tea outside the party. She was wearing a black mesh jumpsuit. The top was sequined with a deep v-neckline and long sleeves. It was a showstopper. Every head seemed to turn towards her but ignored every advantage, man or woman.

You sighed, stood up from your spot at the bar, and pushed your way through the party to the outdoor balcony. You felt her eyes on you as the door closed behind you, and the sounds of the party became muffled. She would come; you just had to wait. So you walked to the patio set in the corner and sat down.

The cool summer air caused goosebumps to form on your skin. You enjoyed the cooler weather, and the sun blasted the city during the day. It recorded high temperatures this year. “You are going to get sick wearing just that,” you knew she was smirking without looking. You were more focused on the city skyline.

“Come keep me warm then,” this time, you looked at the Russian as she walked over to you. She sat down next to you, her thigh barely touching yours, but you felt the warmth she gave off. This was the nature of your relationship with Natasha. Constantly flirting, teasing touches, and longing looks at one another. That was it. It was as if you were both too scared to take that final step. “Are you not enjoying the party?” You turned to face her. Your arm bent on the back of the couch, and you rested your head in your hand. “The talk of the town is that you’re a hero.” You were caught off guard by the bitter laugh that escaped from her, and she sipped on her drink. You frowned.

“I’m not a hero.”

“I think you are,” she said, placing her hand on your thigh. You were wearing a skirt, so you enjoyed the feeling of her hand on your skin.

“You look good,” she said, changing the direction of the conversation. Did you wear this for me?” You rolled your eyes but placed your free hand on top of hers.

“No,” you deadpanned. “I don’t want to inflate your ego, Romanoff.” She smiled and moved closer to you. You thought she was going to kiss you. Instead, she rested her head in space between your neck and shoulder. “Nat,” your voice shook. “What are you doing?” She hummed, and the vibration caused a shiver to travel down your spine.

“I was thinking about kissing you,” she pulled away, and you felt the warmth of her breath on your lips. “What do you say to that, pretty girl?”

“I’d say, what are you waiting for?” Her lips were softer than you expected. Her hand moved to your cheek, keeping you close as the kiss depended on it. She ended it. Her lips were red, and her cheeks were rosy.

“Let’s get out of here,” she whispered. “Drive out of the city, away from the crowds.” You have never moved so fast in your life.

Now, your relationship with the Black Widow has changed. The longing looks were still there, but the flirtatious behavior was replaced with stolen kisses when the team wasn’t looking. Too often, Natasha pushed you up against the tower’s walls and kissed you as her life depended on it, always ending before the team caught you. No one knew, especially your father. For six months, Natasha and you kept your relationship a secret. Even when you knew Natasha wanted to show you off at every party, cuddle with you during moving nights, or claim you as hers. It was you. You weren’t out yet to Tony, and the man was trying to set you up with every eligible bachelor in the city. You were so scared he would be disappointed in you. So you hid, and you pretended it wasn’t kissing you.

You woke up to an empty bed, and the spot Natasha had slept in the previous night was cold. There was the lingering scent of her perfume on her pillow. You had an apartment a little away from the tower. Tony told you often that you could live in the tower, but you liked the sense of privacy. It was also the perfect place to be with Natasha, away from the team. You could be all over her, which you were last night, and a fight broke out.

You were needy and missed your girlfriend, which caused you to be attached to your girlfriend like a koala. She laughed it off at first, poking fun because she was usually the one that constantly wanted to be close to you. You grumbled something about being unable to hug her all day, which was true. You were both so busy the only time you could touch her was at night or early morning before your busy schedule whisked you away from one another. As the night carried on, you noticed a shift in her mood. With Natasha, it was up in the air on how to deal with it. Sometimes, she was honest and told you the truth. Other times, she bottled everything up and shut down.

You decided on the direct approach and asked what was bothering her. She was quiet for a moment and focused on the Bond movie that was playing. It was her night to pick, so you weren’t surprised when you returned from the bathroom to see it queued up on the TV. ‘Are you ashamed to be with me?’ she asked.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t the first time she’s asked you this question. As soon the question was asked, you knew the direction was headed. Over the past six months, it was the only thing you fought about. Hurtful words were said on both sides. She was tired of being your secret. Even though you fought about it before this time, it felt final. She was almost fed up waiting for you.

You sat in your bed and stared at the clothes she had left in your room. Most of them were folded neatly in the space you made for her in the dresser or hung up in the closet next to yours. These clothes were from two nights ago when you ripped them off your girlfriend. You slumped back in the bed, pulled Natasha’s pillow over your face, and inhaled your scent. You needed to get out of bed, but the weight of the fight and waking up to Natasha being gone was soul-crushing. Sighing, you force yourself out of bed to take a quick shower.

You were part of the lead team of scientists at Stark Industries. A position you had to work your ass to get the position and prove to everyone you were more than qualified. You heard the whispers and saw the dirty looks, that everyone believed you got the job because Tony Stark is your father.

Braiding your hair, you entered your kitchen and found a note on the counter. You recognized the handwriting of your girlfriend. ‘Your breakfast smoothie is already blended, and I peeled some hard-boiled eggs. Maybe we can do lunch if you aren’t busy. Forever and Always.’

It was a saying the two of you said. Instead of ‘I love you’, it was ‘Forever and Always.’ Natasha found it easier to say that than the L-word. You kissed the note and placed it in your pocket. Still, your heart felt heavy.

There was no time to see Natasha between meetings, running experiments, and writing reports. You were exhausted and missed your girlfriend. It wasn’t until 3:30 when you saw her. She was in the kitchen, cutting her sandwich into triangles. You always found it funny, but she claimed it tasted better. Your eyes locked onto hers pointed to the side hallway and walked over there. With your back against the wall, you waited. You heard her footsteps as she stood in front of you. “Hi,” she smiled.

“Hi,” you responded and kissed her cheek. But you refused to move away, basking in the warmth she always gave off. You put her arms around her neck and hugged her. Her hands found their natural place on your waist. “I’m sorry,” you whispered. “I’m so sorry. I’m just so scared.” You felt her nod and gently pulled back so she could face you. Your arms remained tightly around her neck.

“I know,” she said. “I’m sorry, too. Forever and always, I promise.”

“Forever and always,” you whispered against her lips. She kissed you softly. In hindsight, getting lost in how Natasha kissed you was a bad idea. You bite her bottom lip, and the gasp she releases lets you deepen the kiss. Her grip on you tightened, and she pushed you back against the wall. You moaned, and it only seemed to spur her on. Kissing Natasha was everything. Every time she kissed you, it took your breath away. Gently morning kisses or rough, passionate kisses against your kitchen counter. You could spend your entire day in her arms and her lips on yours. “Ah, Lady Stark, oh-” you jumped at the sound of the God of Thunder’s voice. His eyes flickered to you and Natasha, whose arms were still around you. “How long has this been going on?”

“6 months,” Natasha answered. You’ve lost your ability to speak. The god smiled.

“Very well. I will find you later,” he winked at you and returned the way he came. Thor knows you thought. Someone on the team caught you. It was only a matter of time before it got back to Tony or Pepper. The Avengers were superheroes, super soldiers, and trained spies, but they were horrible secret-keepers.

“Sweetheart,” you snapped out of your thoughts by Natasha’s voice. “Are you okay?” You nodded, unsure if you were.

“I have to tell Tony and Pepper before it gets back to them through someone else.”

“Do you want me to?”

“No,” you cut her off before she could finish her question. You desperately wanted her to be there but needed to do it alone. You were the reason your relationship was hidden for so long. “Sorry,” you ran your hands over your braid. “I have to do it alone,” you placed her hand over her heart. The steady beat calmed you down. She put her hand over yours and kissed you softly. The kiss was so gentle it felt like a goodbye. You kept your forehead against hers and closed your eyes. There was so much you wanted to say.

What would your last request be? Would you tell her to remember you? She took you to the beach for a date. You stood in a nice dress and stared at the sunset, red lips and rosy cheeks. ‘Remember me there,’ you thought. ‘Say you’ll see me again even if it’s in your wildest dreams.’

“Forever and always,” you said again.

“Forever and always.”

You promised Natasha that you would find her as soon as you were done talking with Tony. Luckily, you had some paperwork to give him, so the visit had a more tangible reason to see him. You opened the door to his office as a dart was thrown, and it hit the door frame. “Oops, sorry, kid,” you rolled your eyes and pulled the dart out of the wood.

“For you,” you dropped the pile of folders onto his desk. “We just need you to verify our numbers are correct, and then we can move on to the next phase.” He groaned dramatically and flopped down into his chair.

“You know I promoted Pepper to CEO, so I didn’t have to deal with paperwork.” Your mother was a saint. You chuckled and aimed at the dart board. You threw it and hit the bullseye.

“It’s your project,” you said, walking over to the board and pulling out the darts. We don’t want another Ultron,” you saw him roll his eyes.

“You make one robot that goes rampant, and it’s all everyone talks about,” you laughed and threw another round of darts. “Do you need these back now?” He pointed to the files.

“No,” you sat in the chair and crossed your legs. “Can I not spend time with my sperm donor?” You ducked at the stress ball he threw at you. He hated it when you called him that, but you loved getting a rise out of him. “Actually,” you folded your hands. “Can we talk about something?” He sat up in the chair. It was rare for you to see the man so seriously.

“Are you dying? Pregnant? Did you kill someone?”

“No!” You laughed and scratched the back of your head. “I uh shit,” you weren’t sure why you were so nervous. You knew the man was an ally. Stark Industries was at every event during Pride.

“Angel,” he smiled. “You can tell me anything, and I won’t be upset.” Angel was the name he called you since you were a baby. You were born very premature and got sick so easily that the doctors weren’t sure if you were going to make it. But you recovered.

“I’m gay,” you whispered. “I’ve known for a while,” you said before he could say anything. “I’ve been so scared to tell you.” He stared at you, blinking a few times, but remained silent. “Right, sorry for wasting your time. I’ll go.” You stood up quickly, knocking over the chair. You left it on the ground and stumbled out of the office. You needed to get out. You needed to go.

Natasha was getting worried. She thought it was taking a lot longer than she thought it would. She asked the AI where Tony was, and the Black Widow walked into a shit show when she entered his lab. Tony was frantically moving holograms around, but they flashed red, and he would try again. Pepper was no better. Her phone was pushed against her ear, and she was pacing. Back and forth. Back and forth. “Are we being attacked?” She asked, making her presence known. Tony glanced at her before focusing back on whatever he was doing.

“I don’t have time for whatever stupid prank Yelena or Peter pulled. Whatever they broke, just order another one,” he began to work again. I have to find her.” He said it mostly to himself. It was a mumbled and throwaway comment, but Natasha heard it. ‘I need to find her,’ Tony said. Natasha grabbed Tony by the shoulder without thinking and threw him into the chair. She steadied him so he wouldn’t fall over.

“What did you say to her?” She asked, crossed her arms, and took a small step back.

“How do you-” he squinted his eyes at her. “Look, I didn’t say anything to her.” He threw his hands to the side. It clicked in Natasha’s head. She knew you better than you knew yourself sometimes. You took his silence as rejection. “Now move so I can find our daughter.” But Natasha stayed.

“Where have you looked?”

“FRIDAY can’t find her,” Pepper ended her call and walked over. “I’ve called some of her favorite sports, but no one has seen her.”

“She’s either turned off her phone or blocked me from finding her.” Natasha always believed you were more intelligent than him, but she knew where you would run off.

“I know where she would go,” Natasha turned on her heels to leave.

“Wait,” Tony called out. His frantic voice caused the Black Widow to stop. “Why do you know so much about her?” Right. If you took off, you wouldn’t have told him. Slowly, Natasha faced him.

“I’ve been dating her for six months,” she said. “So I will find her and make sure she’s safe.”

You knew your time was up when you heard the quiet chime of the front door. You waited until strong arms circled your waist and pulled you flush to her chest. “Found you, my love,” you smiled and chuckled. Of course, she would be the one to find you. She was the only one who knew about this place. “Tell me about this painting.”

You told her a story that captured the emotion of the painting in front of you. You stood in a small art gallery way past closing hours, but the owner gave you the key. You were an investor here, meeting the owner in Central Park while they were painting. The art gallery was small, and it showcased local and small artists. It was peaceful, and the place gave your mind a break. You kept the gallery a secret, protecting your space from the crazy personalities of the Avengers.

“Is he mad?” You finally asked. Natasha shook her head and kissed your shoulder.

“No, he’s worried he couldn’t find you,” she chuckled softly. “I may have told him we are dating.”

“Oh,” you whispered. You felt oddly okay with him knowing, even if he wasn’t going to accept you as you were. “Where is he?”

“Well, I told him to stay at the tower,” Natasha sighed. “But he’s stubborn, and I caught him and Pepper following me.” You laughed, not surprised that Tony Stark couldn’t follow a car without getting caught. You spun around to face your girlfriend, arms around her neck and hugged her tight.

“Forever and always,” you whispered.

“I love you too.” The three-word statement shocked you and made your stomach flip. Your heart filled with butterflies. You were happy and terrified but mostly happy.

You were startled when you walked out of the gallery, and your dad bulldozed into you. His arms wrapped around you tightly. “I love you,” he said. “I love you and support you even if you have questionable taste in women.” You let out a watery laugh and wiped away your tears.

“Thanks, Stark,” Natasha rolled her eyes with a small smile on her face.

“I will support you. I will always want you to be happy,” Tony continued.

“We love you no matter who you love,” Pepper said, getting out of the car and joining you. “No matter what.” You collapsed into your parents’ arms and cried against them. A weight was lifted off your chest, and you felt free.

The next Stark Party, you were sitting on the couch. This time, Natasha’s arm wrapped tightly around your waist and your hand on her thigh. It seemed second nature that the two of you were attached at the hip. No one batted an eye. When looking back at it, you seemed a little silly. But now you were free to live your life to the fullest.

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x stark!reader #tony stark x pepper potts #black widow x reader #black widow x you #black widow fanfiction #inspired by music

354 notes · View notes

abbyromanoff · 5 months

Note

hellloo🤗 i was wondering if u could do a 1850s natasha x f!reader based on ivy by taylor swift. kinda like where nat is a nurse or something and reader is a housewife. nat wants reader to herself. kinda like emily dickinson and sue gilbert from dickinson?

IVY

PAIRINGS: Natasha Romanoff x reader

WORD COUNT: 1124

WARNINGS: death, nat kills someone but not in a dark way, talks of witch craft, cheating, think that’s really all :)

NO ONE IS PERMITTED TO STEAL, COPY, OR REBLOG MY WORK AS THEIR OWN!!

“Will he be okay, Nat?” She sighed, grabbing your hand and leading you to a more secluded area. You gulped nervously, your eyes falling around the building to spot if anyone else would have sighting of your shared encounter.

“You’re worrying me, what’s wrong with him?” She rubbed your arms soothingly, bringing you in for a quick, soft kiss before resting her forehead against yours.

“I’m sorry, love, I’m afraid the wound is too great to heal. It’s spread throughout his body and is infecting him. The doctors have tried removing it but there’s only a slim chance he can survive, and even then he would live a life of deep pain and suffering.” You bit your lip, removing yourself from her hold and turning, unable to let Nat see the tears that threatened to escape. You never loved him, that was known to her, but she understood your grievance.

“He was a good man, he didn’t deserve this.” That was a lie, and the bruises often marking your body only proved so. Nat would never tell you her lips turned upwards when hearing the news, but deep down you knew she was thrilled. This could be your one chance to escape with her through the woods to the small cabin she had spent her free time building for you. It was the one of your dreams, and your husband never cared to listen, stating he was too busy to build. But Nat wasn’t, she devoted the time she did not have to making everything and anything your heart desired, and she guessed watching her father working tirelessly building homes for others helped her learn a few steps.

“It may be best to say your goodbyes now before it is much too late.”

The following day you decided to visit your husband who awaited his time, he knew he didn’t have long, but he refused to admit it to himself. Flowers were held in your hand from your garden, despite the fact that he never cared to even notice them. Everything you worked hard for he lacked to notice, but you grew used to it.

But what you didn’t expect to walk in on was Nat silencing his screams, and her needle ripping the stitches the doctor performed on. Your eyes widened, and you dropped the petaled object in hand, the action catching her ear as she turned quickly, copying your position the moment she saw your figure.

“Y/N..”

“You’re- you’re killing him! How could you?” You rushed over to the man, and Nat worried your noises would alert the few other nurses or doctors. When you reached for him, you felt his heart slowing to a stop, and you assumed Nat had been putting him through this for longer than you had seen.

“He wished to die, Y/N. It hurt him too much to even breathe, and he begged me to take his life, so I did. I’m sorry.” Your tears began to fall onto his now warm skin, you did not want to feel it when he was cold and empty.

“I just- I can’t believe he’s actually gone.”

“I know, I’m so sorry, sweetheart.” She was taken aback when you wrapped your arms around her figure, desperately searching for comfort that you could only receive from her.

“Take me away from this, please, I can’t handle it.” That night she brought you to your home, allowing you to gather your belongings in secrecy. People hadn’t quite yet heard of the death of your husband, but your sudden departure would cause awful suspicion from the townsmen. So, you decided that this would be the last time your presence was spotted in this town, and you were to run off with the love of your life.

“Do you need any help with that?” Nat stood in the doorway of your bedroom, the one you used to share with your now-late partner.

“I’m almost done, I’m only gathering essentials.”

“Really? I took a few pieces of furniture as well, I’ve never been able to afford any of this.” You chuckled, stalking towards her and pressing a kiss to her sweet lips, the action bringing you a quick relief. When she was with you, holding you, kissing you, making love to you, everything seemed to fade away until it was only the two of you left.

“You’re the most important thing in my life, Y/N. I can not even imagine losing you.” You smiled, resting your head on her shoulder as she embraced you in a warm hug, causing you to melt in her hold.

“I have a surprise for you, darling.” Your face lit up, and her heart skipped a beat at the sight.

“Follow me when you are done packing, I have a place for the two of us to stay.”

Less than an hour later you were both scavenging through the woods, giggles leaving both of your lips as you ran, the leaves teasing your ankles as your hand was held by her.

“Okay, it’s right over here.” You both stopped, and she came up behind you with a smirk, her hands coming to cover your eyes as she led you forward. Even in the dark, she knew where to lead you, and you followed, trusting that she would never bring you into danger.

“And open!” You gasped when spotting the small building, and words seemed to fail to gather in your mind. It was beautiful, everything you had ever dreamed of, and everything you confined her in.

“It’s…beautiful. I can’t even believe it,”

“Well, believe it, because this is our new home.” She gripped the sides of your waist softly, pecking your cheek and lifting each item into her arms with ease, her strength always seemed to interest you.

“Here we can grow old together, just like we always wanted. I have a garden for you out back, so you can grow all the vegetables and flowers you wish. There’s a lake not far from here that I promise to bring you to any time I can, and there we can make love on the soft grass while the water sways in the wind. We can marry there, even if it may not be legally, I will still consider you my wife. I want to spend every waking moment with you here, and I will never wish to leave you, my love. So, Y/N, will you take my hand in marriage, and join me as my lover for all eternity? In sickness and in hell, I want you under all circumstances. And even in death, I will be with you, in every universe.”

And in every universe, you two found your way together, just like she promised.

378 notes · View notes

writerslittlelibrary · 14 days

Text

Can you dim the world...?

masterlist

summary: you go shopping with your mom but the store overwhelms you

pairing: Natasha x autistic daughter reader

warnings: autistic reader getting overstimulated at a grocery store

genre: fluff

words: 963

a/n: this is pretty much what I experience when I go to any big grocery store, and I wish I had Nat as my mom to help me :( (friendly reminder that this is how my autism works, so if it doesn’t relate to you then it doesn’t mean it’s inaccurate representation)

You do not have my permission to repost, copy or translate my work

|——————————— ⴵ ———————————|

When Natasha had asked you whether or not you wanted to join her in going to the store, you had excitedly told her yes, wanting to spend time with her. However, now that you were standing in the grocery store you regretted that decision big time.

The drive towards the store had been fun. You and Natasha had been singing along to the new album of Taylor Swift, and Natasha had promised to get ice cream after the shopping had been done.

Once you got to the store, things hadn’t been that bad. Sure, the lights were a bit bright, and the people were a bit loud, but it wasn’t terrible.

You had started to zone out at the cheese section, waiting at the cart while Natasha picked a pack of sliced cheese. She had to get the right brand, otherwise it would taste different than what you liked, and Natasha knew you hated when things tasted different than what you were used to.

Natasha had thrown the packet of cheese into the cart, and while doing so she had checked her grocery list, giving you an instruction to go grab something.

You hadn’t heard her, too focused on the store workers standing at the sliced meat isle where they talked and laughed while restocking everything.

“Are you okay…?” you suddenly heard your mom say, snapping you out of your daydreaming.

You blinked a few times before looking at Natasha, nodding.

She looked at you sceptically, knowing that when you were nodding you were indeed not okay. You going mute was always the first thing to happen when you were getting overstimulated.

“We just have to get a few more things, okay baby? We’ll be quick,” your mom reassured you, making sure not to touch you, wanting to prevent you from getting overstimulated faster.

Once you were getting overwhelmed with sounds, you would start zoning out, staring at people around you or focusing on a single spot. Then you would get overstimulated by all the people around you, fiding all your surroundings too busy. Then, usually following that you would completely break down at everything that was touching you.

Natasha knew all your signs, knew every step that your spiralling would take.

She was quick to grab all the stuff that you guys came for, leaving you at the cart, not giving you any instructions nor really talking to you.

Once everything was paid for Natasha took the cart from you, loading everything up into the car while you went and sat down in it. She brought the cart back before sitting next to you, waiting a moment with starting the car.

“Would you like it to be quiet for a moment?” Natasha asked you, waiting patiently on your nod or head shake.

Once you nodded Natasha leaned back into her chair, turning slightly to grab something from the backseat. When she turned back she handed you your favourite drink and your comfort snack, allowing you two to sit in silence for a while.

After about 10 minutes, when you finished your snack and were slowly sipping your drink, you reached for the buttons in the car, pressing play on the song you were listening to before you two entered the store. Natasha smiled as she started the car, knowing you were calming down. She knew you were probably not going to speak for another couple of minutes, sometimes even hours, but she knew you weren’t getting overstimulated by your surroundings anymore.

“Would you still like to get ice cream, or do it tonight or tomorrow?” Natasha asked you, knowing that giving you the reassurance of getting the ice cream, no matter when, would allow you to choose whatever you were comfortable with.

You shook your head ‘no,’ letting Natasha know that you didn’t want to get ice cream right now.

She nodded and focused on the road again, taking a detour, knowing you would calm down from the driving in the car while listening to music. Natasha learned that very early on when she found out it was the only way to calm you down when you were throwing a tantrum as a kid. She now knew you never threw a tantrum to be annoying. You merely did it because you didn’t know how to express yourself and handle your own feelings.

Natasha glanced at you, sighing. She wished so deeply that she was able to understand you earlier in life. You had been such a difficult child, and it turned out that was only because no one understood you.

After driving for about an hour, Natasha pulled the car into the driveway, letting you sit in the car to process everything while she went and got all the groceries inside.

Once she returned, you had already opened your car door and you were now sitting with your legs outside of the car, zoned out. Your mom walked up to you, crouching down in front of you and placing her hand on your knee.

“I’ve already, put the water on, and I figured we could have some tea or hot chocolate and maybe draw for a bit?” Natasha asked you, waiting patiently for your nod. She knew you would never say no to that.

You two went inside where you found the drawing supplies already on the table. Natasha must have placed them on there while you were still in the car.

You two spent a nice, quiet evening. You hadn’t talked much, and neither had Natasha. You simply sat in silence, enjoying each other's comfort. You knew the world would most likely always be too much for you to handle, but you also knew that as long as your mama was around, she would always make the world a bit more bearable.

(I’m so sorry I suck at endings)

Hello lovelies. As you may have noticed I haven’t been posting as often as I usually do. I’ve been overwhelmed, tired with life and basically just downright depressed. At the moment I just feel like dying, so if you noticed the lack of fics you now know the reason. I will try to stay active, but I probably won’t post as often (or maybe I will, idk, I’m a very unpredictable person and my mood swings are insane)

Permanent tags: @marvelnatasha12346 @lesbionion @nova-kyle @darkstar225 @saraaahsstuff @marvelwomenarehot0 @screechcat @iheartjohansson @tia-thesimp @swaqcenix @karmasgxrl @marvel-lous3000 @hor1zond1ar1es @lorsstar1st @superlegend216 @ravensinthedaylight

#black widow #marvel #natasha x reader #mcu #natasha romanoff #marvel reader insert #natasha x daughter #avengers #natasha x reader platonic #natasha #natasha romanov #natasha romanoff x daughter #natasha romanoff x reader platonic #natasha romanoff x reader #mom!natasha romanoff #mom!natasha #natasha romanoff x teen reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x female

196 notes · View notes

badingsm · 7 months

Note

hai! can you write a g!p/intersex nat big age gap

Warnings: Cursing, age gap, office romance, slightly mean Nat, intersex (but it will only come soon!), no hate towards Sharon :)

Hi Anon! It's going to be a miniseries again because The Proposal is my all-time favorite romcom (love SANDY B!) and it's kind of fitting anyway. Nat is in her early 40s and the reader's mid-20s, okay? I think Sands was 45 in that movie.

"Shit, shit, shit-"

You muttered underneath your breath as you tried to slip past the crowd.

Your alarm clock rang on time, but your body didn't wake up on time, and now you were in a rush to get your boss's coffee because, if not, she'd chew you down with her endless words filled with anger and more.

"Y/n! Hey!" Athena called you over the line, and you sighed in relief. "Here you go! Your regular lattes."

"Thank you, thank you! You saved my life!" You grinned sweetly towards the other woman with whom you've shared a special bond because of the times that she has saved you from getting the tardiness talk with your punctual boss. You then rushed to the traffic, mingling with the cars, to cross over the street to go and enter your building. Thankfully, just as the doors of the elevator were about to close, you ended up entering just in time. You turned your head, panting, to your co-worker beside you. "Are you okay there, buddy?"

He nodded shortly and said, "Yes."

"Yeah, me too!" You smiled.

The ride in the elevator was quiet, but you felt relieved when you realized that you were four minutes earlier than your boss. The doors soon opened, and just as you were rushing through your boss's office, you suddenly collided with the janitor named Fred, causing the one cup of coffee to spill all over your clothes.

"Sweet jesus!"

"I'm so sorry!" He apologized profusely, and you didn't have the heart to get mad because he's a good man.

But still.

You've got a soaking button-up blouse, making you rush towards your friend's corner to borrow hers because you know you'll be sitting on an hour and a half lecture about your dirty clothes at work.

And nobody wants that.

"I've got Taylor Swift Eras Tour tickets, VIPs, and I need a shirt in 5.. 4.. 3.. 2.."

"Morning hassle?" Kate chuckled lowly, already removing her suit jacket to go change with you in the corner.

"Thanks!" You breathed out, grabbing one of the coffee cups before rushing towards the witch's office because you'd already heard the loud clacking noises of her annoying stilettos. "Morning, boss. You have a conference meeting in 30 minutes."

"Yes. The one with the team where we'll talk about their useless opinions because they're just all words and no action, I know."

"Briefing with Director Fury by 9 o'clock."

"Did you call the one with the—the ugly attitude like her?"

"Sharon." You nodded. "I told her she'd be fired if she didn't pass her files by 4. The immigration also called-"

"Cancel the call. Push the meeting to tomorrow. Keep the lawyer on the sheets," Natasha mumbled while typing aggressively on her keyboard. "You should know our priorities by now."

Just as you were about to respond, the phone rang loudly, causing you to jog over the table to go and pick it up.

"Miss Romanoff's office." You greeted through the phone, "Yes, Director, you're calling us in your office—and we're on our way." You answered when you saw Natasha's signal. "Yes. We'll be there in 5. Thank you."

"Go grab the document that I told you to finish a few days ago," Natasha instructed with her monotone voice while she grabbed her coffee and turned around. You were about to do as she said when suddenly, you heard Natasha speak again, "Um, who's Athena, and why does she want me to call her?"

You turned around, grimacing when you saw her raised brows, holding the cup of coffee with some written phone number. "Well, that was originally my cup."

She squinted her eyes. "And I'm drinking your coffee, why?"

"Because your coffee spilled." You watch her take a sip slowly.

"So you drink unsweetened cinnamon-light soy lattes?" Natasha questioned carefully. You could practically feel the sharpness of her jawbone as she looked at you through those dangerous eyes of hers.

"I do," You replied, biting your inner cheeks. "It's like Christmas in a cup."

"Christmas in a cup, my ass."

"Excuse me, gentlemen." You knocked against the hardwood door just as instructed and practiced. "Miss Foster's calling over the phone unstoppably, and I keep telling her you're otherwise engaged with some-"

Natasha signaled you sharply to come inside the room after she looked at you weirdly for a good while, as if some light bulb had just snapped inside her head, and you reluctantly agreed, even if it was against your will.

"Gentlemen," Natasha started with her sickly sweet smile that you know, even from a distance, is a fake one of hers, but she's always good at covering it up. "I understand the predicament that we are in. The thing about my deportation is kind of—and this might come as a surprise, but I assure you, no deportation will happen because well, Y/n and I—are, um, getting married.." You suddenly felt dizzy when those words were let out of her mouth. "Yes, you heard it right. We're getting married."

"Who's getting married?" Ross questioned with his white hair, chin-filled beard, and sarcastic look.

"Oh, you know, Y/n and I," Natasha answered with ease, even though you felt your whole world thicken with tension. "Just like your former assistant, Miranda—whom you fired because your wife found out about your affair," Your boss smirked when she finally got the upper hand again. "Y/n and I... we weren't meant to fall in love, but we did, and now we're getting married."

"Who's...?" You couldn't even utter a sentence because you stood there, completely dumbfounded. You were bombarded with this conversation that you had never even once in your life imagined happening. "Who's getting married...?"

"You and I." Natasha pinched your side so as not to make the others see. "Are getting married."

Cruel. Witch.

You blinked owlishly and repeated, "You and I are..."

"You and I are getting married, baby." Natasha awkwardly hugged you, patting your back while you coughed silently with the force that her palm had carried. "We're getting married soon, my love."

"Wow." You fishmouthed, your brain running through a million miles while your mouth stayed rooted in its agape. "You... you and I are getting married?"

"Yes." She faced the director, who's been eerily silent ever since you've entered. "So, are we good here? Is there anything else?"

"Um," Ross cleared his throat loudly, "Just make it official, Miss Romanoff."

"Right!" Natasha nodded. "Wedding rings. Ceremonies. Got it. Of course."

"Mm, congratulations on the engagement, though."

"Thanks, Directors." Natasha briefly bid her goodbyes, and then you and her were off to go.

You followed her silently from behind, already hearing the defeaning murmurs of your co-workers, and you were already sweating profusely as you followed and shut the door behind the both of you.

Natasha sat through her paperwork, signing here and there like she hadn't just set your whole world upside down with her (not so) little announcement.

"Um, excuse me, were you not there?" You scoffed sarcastically, your jaw clenching while your fists shook uncomfortably against your sweaty palm. "What happened in there?"

"What?" Natasha raised her brow.

"Wedding? Marriage?" You whisper-shouted. "What the hell?!"

"Believe me, this will benefit you tremendously too," She replied, giving you a silent eye roll that you didn't fail to see because your eyes were trained against her. "If anything, you should be thanking me."

"Do explain."

"Well, for one, if I'm getting deported, you'll be automatically moved or fired, and I guarantee you, it will be the latter, and I know you don't want that." Natasha finally looked up from her paperworks; she stopped everything that she's doing as you stood there having an intense staring contest with her. "Don't you?" She scoffed, lolwly mumbling, "And it's not like you're saving yourself for somebody else."

"Well, I'd like to think so." With gritted teeth, you shook your head from side to side and answered, "No."

"Exactly. So, now, we're getting married." She uttered like it was the easiest and most normal thing in the world, "Schedule a meeting with the immigration department so everything will fall into place, yeah?"

Yeah, no..

Because really..

What the hell is going on?!

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff fluff #black widow #natasha romanoff x you #black widow x reader #soft natasha romanoff #marvel #marvel imagines #natasha romanoff au #the proposal 2009

623 notes · View notes

romanoffsbish · 1 year

Text

You Could Never Hurt Me

Beefy!Natasha Romanoff x Fem!R

I was challenged [I read something someone said (you can only go so soft when you have that much beef in the mix), and made it an unnecessary challenge 🤭]

Warnings: Jealousy, Insecure Nat, aka really soft.

Smut: Ab Riding (R), Fingering (R), Oral (N).

18+ | Minors DNI

Natasha smiled as she entered the kitchen, it was an unstoppable reaction when seeing you. You’d always been so excitable, so it’s no shock to her that you’re animatedly relaying your last nights events to a bleary eyed Wanda who’s sipping her tea, and mindlessly nodding along.

“This really pretty girl asked for my number!” You shrieked, and Natasha instantly frowned. “Can you believe it Wands? I was shocked.”

Natasha’s frown had managed to deepen, she could believe it without question, you were perfect, too much so for her to ever have, she’d never be enough for you. She was too gruff, and she would only ever hurt you with her ways.

You deserved a tenderness she didn’t feel she could offer you, and it seems you found it.

—

That had her heart actually snapping in two, she left the kitchen rather abruptly with an unfinished breakfast left behind in her wake.

Wanda shook her head as Natasha took off, she heard her thoughts, and they were followed up by your very own, “You should tell her Y/N/N.”

“It’s no use Wands, she didn’t even look my way,” you dejectedly sigh, and the witch nearly chokes on her cooled beverage, “Are you blind? Her eyes were literally on you the whole time.”

“Why? Is there something on my face?”

“Not yet,” she grumbles, and you softly pout, “I anticipate my hand will leave quite the mark.”

“That’s not very nice, I’m having a crisis, and you want to threaten me,” you huffed, crossing your arms for emphasis as you turned away.

Wanda cackled as she settled her mug down, she slowly made her way over to you, and pulled you in for a hug you didn’t reciprocate, “You are blind, but hear me when I say, she wants you Y/N, but she’s scared of hurting you. Of not being enough, and a whole lot of things you should talk about with her, try tonight.”

Tonight, the Avengers annual charity gala…

—

Natasha paced her room for hours thinking about what you said. She didn’t stick around to hear if the mystery girl was going to be your plus one tonight, her heart would’ve imploded. The thought of someone else loving you hurt her more than she ever thought imaginable.

But as the time for the party neared she shook off the resentment, she’d try being happy for you tonight, and bury her love for you instead.

That’s what she thought until she saw you at least, you looked stunning, she wasn’t shocked. Of course you did, you managed to make lazy outfits attractive, so you dressed to the nines being the hottest thing she’d ever seen fits.

“You’re drooling,” Yelena chides as she settles by her sister at the bar, and throws up two fingers to the bartender in a silent order.

“Zamolchi,” she grumbled bitterly as she accepted the shot from her sister, downing it in one swift motion that almost painted her as a drunk with the way she didn’t even wince.

(Shut up)

“Go talk to her Natasha,” Yelena encouraged, “She’s got the heart eyes for you, I promise.”

Yelena was your very best friend, even above Wanda, so if anyone knew it’d be her, plus, she was a trained spy, but even more so she had hazel eyes that could see the painfully obvious.

Natasha went to shake her head, to vehemently negate the blondes claims of reciprocity, but then she was in direct route to you before the spitfire beside her could beat her to the punch.

Literally—she punched a sleaze square in the jaw without even breaking a sweat, then she instinctively wrapped her strong arms around your trembling form, “Shh, it’s okay malysh, please don’t cry, you’re safe here, I promise.”

A fluttering commenced in the redheads chest when you burrowed further into her, “I know,” your whispered acknowledgment melted her even further. The redhead gently swayed you, and she smiled softly when your short arms did their best to wrap around her toned body.

The two of you stood there in your embrace for a few minutes, paying no mind to the posse of Avengers that corralled the asshole and gave him the ass kicking of his life for touching you. You weren’t an Avenger, just their assistant for all things PR, but they all loved you as family.

Natasha looked up from your face smushed against her chest, she surveyed the building crowd and she felt a need to shield you further. You’d always hated the attention, so she took it upon herself to lift you off the ground with her hands under your thighs for leverage as she took you as far away from there as possible.

Once she made it to your shared hall she set you down, “Want to watch a movie Y/N?”

“Can we just cuddle instead please Natty?”

Natasha nodded and pulled back causing you to whine, “Come back,” you reached for her and she softly snorted, “I’m getting snacks.”

You wanted to protest, to pull her back in, but for starters you were no match for her strength, and you also had plans that warranted future sustenance so you let her go without a fight.

As soon as she reentered her room she was shocked to find you on her bed in only a sports bra, and short as can be sleep shorts. Keeping her breathing steady was an act of desperation, and when you looked at her so innocently she believed it, missing the way your eyes smirked.

“I got chips, and some bean dip,” she said as she held up the loot, her eyes were lightly hazy and you knew then that Wanda wasn’t lying. Honestly you found her endearing, the way she held eye contact with you over letting her gaze wander like she wanted, “I also stole you a brown sugar pop-tart from Thor’s stash.”

You clapped giddily, “Yes! You’re the best!” then you catapulted from atop the bed and right into her flexed arms. Natasha huffed, and if not for her strength she’d have likely been laid out flat on the floor in a mess of snacks, with a delectable one atop her. However she caught you with ease, and settled the bags down before doing the same with herself.

Natasha’s heart rate was already racing with you on her, it soon picked up though with the way you gently shifted to straddle her lap. She’d cuddled you many times, each one a test of her willpower that she usually won, but you were not helping her as you softly ground your hips into hers while maintaining her gaze, she believed it to be unintentional, but then you suddenly kissed her and she knew it wasn’t.

“Y/N…” she whimpered against your lips, a silent plea for you to stop, but she didn’t mean it, she just feared this was an adrenaline rush sort of response on your end, and she wanted it to be so much more, you were her dream girl.

“Shh, let me thank you properly Natasha,” you pressed against her shoulders, the action was in vain as you were unable to move the brick of a woman, but fortunately for you her already thin resolve had crumbled, so she laid down.

With a nod of approval, and a soft touch you removed her suit jacket, and grey camisole. Natasha’s chiseled physique was even better than you’d imagine it to be, and you were more than ready for her to show you her strength.

“You’re so beautiful Nat,” you ran your fingers over her arms, feeling the muscles beneath jerking at your simple touch, seeing as her skin flushed at your ministrations, and watching as she tried desperately to speak, “Th-thanks.”

You smiled, “You’re most certainly welcome,” and then you leaned down to kiss her again, you were lost in the warm feeling brought on by her lips on yours, but when her whimper reverberated in your mouth, and as you felt your cunt clench with need you were upright, and her black slacks and panties went with you.

Natasha’s chest heaved as she tried to calm herself down, which was proving impossible as she had a front row seat to you undressing. You were sure to put on a show as you discarded your bra, and twisted your pebbled nipples, the both of you groaning in tandem at the gesture.

Then went your shorts, and she audibly choked when she saw how wet you already were for her. It was over for her though when she felt you slip your drenched panties into her clenched hand, and on instinct she brought them to her face, and sniffed, “Trakhni menya.”

(Fuck me)

“Oh, I plan to,” you winked and she spluttered from beneath you in clear need of information, “I’m your PR assistant Nat, I know my stuff.”

Natasha moaned languidly when she felt your slick drip into the grooves of her abdomen, she was desperate to grab you, to guide you, but she was too afraid to hurt you, so she didn’t. This very fact was clear to you when you saw her brows painfully furrowed, with her hands clenched at her side as you continued to grind.

With a softness you kissed her brow until it settled beneath your lips, your hands unfurled her own, and you guided them to your waist. Natasha’s eyes shot open fearfully, but you stopped her protests with a sloppy, heated kiss, you wanted to encourage her to follow her instincts, but all she did was try to let you go.

“Nat, please,” you whimpered, placing her hands back on your hips again, and she sighed, “I don’t want to hurt you Y/N… Please…”

“Oh Natty,” you softly chuckled, slowing your grinding down as you focused on her worried pout, “You could never hurt me, you’re my Natty bear, the one who cuddles me close on movie nights, who goes to the store at 1am to get me ice cream just because I’m cramping, and the one who defends my honor in ways that drive me absolutely up the wall. I need you, so please, just touch me, and don’t stop.”

Natasha smiled genuinely, and as you picked the pace back up she decided to aide you once you got sloppy with your movements. With a soft grip she guided your cunt against her abs, she flexed them every time she pulled you down, and you rewarded her with a loud moan, and a gush of your essence on her flushed skin.

You fell into her, crashing your lips to hers for a kiss that left you both panting in seconds. Natasha gently flipped your positions, she ran a calloused thumb over the side of your face, and watched you slowly returning to yourself.

“Hi,” you meekly greeted and she chuckled breathlessly, “Hey there pretty girl,” she kissed you tenderly, and you became absolute mush.

Natasha wasn’t done with you now that she’d had a little taste, her lips moved from yours to nip at your skin wherever she could, and she smirked when you clutched at her biceps in a silent plea of clear desperation for her touch.

“I’m going to take care of you sweetheart,” she trailed her fingers down your body, every part of you she grazed over tensed as she was in clear route to your dripping sex, and once she made it there you were writhing with need.

“Calm down baby,” her hands squeezed the flesh of your thighs, the force of her grip alone had you mewling as the sinful thought of her thick fingers venturing further, and delving deep inside you flooded your hazy mind.

“Is it okay baby?” she spread your thighs, and nodded towards your cunt, “Wanna feel you.”

“Please,” you fisted the sheets as you pleaded, your hips rose up instinctively, and she gently pushed them back into the mattress with a soft kiss being placed above your pelvic bone before her fingers finally pushed inside of you.

“I can’t believe this is real,” she grunted in amazement, the feel of you wrapped around her was something she’d only ever dreamed of, and to feel your warmth in real time was wildly intoxicating, and she knew without doubt it’d would be impossible to let you go after tonight.

“Natty please, more,” you reached down and dug your nails into her muscular shoulders, Natasha hissed softly as you managed to make her bleed, but she would never complain, in fact she only aimed to please so she gave you a third finger that ended up being your vice.

“Is that what you needed?” she smirked up at you, your mouth was wide open, spewing the most obscene moans she’d ever heard as she thrusted her fingers into you just right, “You look so pretty for me baby,” she circled your clit with her rough thumb and you screamed.

You really did look like a vision with your body shaking uncontrollably on the bed, her fingers damn near trapped inside of you as your walls squeezed her impossibly tight, you were in the depths of euphoria, and you looked like you belonged nowhere else but in her bed for her to take at any given moment, “Such a good girl, you drenched my hand baby, thank you.”

Natasha lifted her fingers up to her lips, her eyes that were voided with speckles of green swimming around had fluttered shut as soon as your essence caressed her tastebuds, she was so incredibly aroused by your existence, and your unique taste only made her even more so. It’s had a similar affect on you too, the sight of her alone always had you warm, but hearing her appreciative moans left you a bit of a mess.

Then when she looked at you with that smirk of hers, the one that tells you she knows she’s hot stuff it made you desperate for a repeat attack. But then you got a grip of yourself, and the one more prominent thought was wanting to please her,which is was what you had set out to do.

“Natasha, I was meant to be thanking you,” you whined when she laid down beside you, she only chuckled as she pulled your body on top or hers with ease, “Tasting you was all the reward I needed malysh, it’s all good baby.”

You felt her thighs clench, as if her body was trying to call her out for lying, and you decided to do the same, “I can feel you Nat,” you said it so softly, because embarrassing her wasn’t the goal, “Your wetness is all over my stomach.”

“Y/N,” she tried to settle your curiosity, but your blown out eyes and finger over her lip told her the downplaying over her need was futile.

“Then how about you let me have a turn?” you asked, and she nodded dumbly, because truth be told she was powerless to your advances, “It’s only fair I get a taste,” you reasoned, the way you looked down at her spurred on an uncharacteristic whimper from deep within.

“I know you’re going to taste divine my love,” you purred as you pecked her lips, Nat felt her heart speed up at your slip of tongue, she could get used to being yours, she already had.

Natasha squirmed as you pried her legs open, she honestly felt so exposed, it was unfamiliar territory, but at the same time she trusted you with her life, even if she could toss you around, she knew from an emotional end you had her.

“So pretty for me baby,” you admired her body, the new angle was picturesque really, her arms were perfectly defined, certain muscles flexed as she clenched her fists, her abs prominently flexed too as she waited for you to tend to her.

This woman could easily destroy you, and you’d let her, but here you have her laid out for you in a way you knew she didn’t just let anyone see. You cherished the idea that you were that special to her, and you vowed right there to never break that trust she had in you.

“Are you ready baby?” you licked over the salty skin of her thigh teasingly as you awaited her response, and when she breathlessly pleaded for you to do something you dove into her cunt.

Natasha couldn’t breath for the first thirty seconds as you lapped away at her, never in her life had she been this desperate or sensitive, but you’d also never been naked in her bed before today so it all seemed to be adding up.

Soon it was you who was unable to breathe. So lost in the pleasure she clamped her thighs shut around you, her quads held your head in an unforgiving grip. You were without oxygen but you honestly couldn’t be bothered to care when all you wanted was to please her, to feel her walls flutter around your tongue, to have her heady scent permanently on your upper lip.

Natasha came about a minute later, your name torn from her throat like a prayer she’d needed answered, and in a shocking manner her taut legs trembled, and therefore relinquished their hold on you. As you gasped for air Natasha began to realize what had likely happened, but before she could panic you were smiling at her, your face absolutely drenched in her essence.

In this exact moment, under the bright light of the moon you’d never looked more beautiful.

Natasha pulled you up from between her legs, and into a strong, but unsurprisingly gentle embrace as you worked to breathe steadily. Once she heard your breathing temper she lifted your head and pulled you into a kiss.

“I love you Y/N,” she whispered her confession against your lips, and when you pulled back she looked at you with soft eyes that swam with a vulnerability reminiscent of fear, and so you cupped her cheek, your eyes glistened with joy and you kissed her again, “I love you too.”

Natasha’s embrace tightened, you buried your face into her neck, and sighed, “Goodnight,” as she lifted the duvet over your bodies.

“Just to be clear, you didn’t give that girl your number right?” she meekly broke the silence.

You cackled tiredly against her, “Never even considered it Nat, I was too hung up on you.”

Natasha kissed your cheek, you could feel her smirking as she did, and you rolled your eyes.

“Go to sleep, let your ego get some rest,” you teased, and she chuckled, “Goodnight Y/N.”

——

3,116 Words

❤️ Kaitlyn 🥩

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff oneshot #natasha romanoff fanfic #natasha romanoff fanfiction #natasha romanoff smut #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x y/n #natasha x reader #natasha x y/n #natasha romanoff x female reader #gxg #natasha x you #natasha x fem!reader #beefy Natasha

1K notes · View notes

bisluthq · 2 years

Note

I wonder what the dynamics are between the Swifts and the Alwyns. One set are capitalist conservative (ish) Americans into finance and money. The other are ultra liberal arty types who value intellect over cash and are very English. Also Elizabeth is a psychologists and if you are right both Andrea and Taylor are a bit weird. The upside is all four of them seem to be pretty smart and that usually means they can get along. Also their kids are crazy about each other and they love their kids so they should be okay.

I think they’re good with one another and complement both kids very well. I think Taylor loves being around the Alwyns, and Joe loves being around the Swifts, and the moms also probably get along. I think the dads are both smart and shit so it’s also not a problem. I think they’re all good with one another tbh.

#nat talks the swifts #nat talks the alwyns

12 notes · View notes

ilovesnat · 1 month

Text

jack was scarlett's boyfriend and is bffs with taylor, that's literally my dream, i wish i was you😓

#nat's quince talks #scarlett johansson #taylor swift #swifties #taylornation #scarlett johansson x y/n #scarlett johansson x reader #scarlett johansson imagine

30 notes · View notes

imtryingbuck · 2 months

Text

Unchained Melody

~ gif not mine credit to owner ~

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Summary: yns a ghost and Bucky falls in love

Word count: 5,257

Warnings: in this the blip never happened why? because I said so. swearing. ghost reader. death by fire. tiny mention of cheating, not reader or bucky. tiny mention of drugs, not reader or bucky. tiny mention of domestic abuse and child abuse. Me just making shit up, enjoy.

A/N: posting this in celebration of hitting 1k followers, I love you all🤍

Masterlist

You first saw him three years ago, shiny silver arm with a red star on the bicep shoulder length wavy hair - that you knew just had to be soft - you had watched as the team greeted him with smiles and his response? To look at them like they had just kicked his puppy. Walking at the side of Steve as you both showed him to his room, it was basic and dull not like the others your favourite belonging to Wanda, you was telling him all the things he could do with it - picking out a colour theme, that if he moved the desk over to the sid-

“I like it”

You looked at him like he had three heads on his shoulders. The room was bare and empty how could he have liked it?

As the days turned to weeks you stayed close to him, at first you told yourself it was just to help him settle in but the more times you spent with the man you grew a teeny tiny connection with him, even if he did ignore you all the time.

“So Bucky I was thinking maybe we could go to the gym and then get someth-hey where are you going? Rude.”

In a very non creepy way you liked to watch him sleep, his frown lines faded, the little twitches in his nose always made you smile, his soft snores filling your senses. Again it was done in a very non creepy way! But watching Bucky sleep brought you peace knowing he was oka-

“Bucky Bucky it’s just a nightmare it’s okay, shit, Steve! Goddamn Bucky please wake up! Steve Sam anyone!” You screamed in absolute panic the first time he had a nightmare.

“It’s okay Buck it’s just a bad dream”

“Yeah no shit Steve I’ve been shouting you for the last five minutes-hey don’t walk away from me when I’m talking to yo-you know Bucky I absolutely hate it when people shut doors on me when I’m talki-oh you’re asleep, oh okay night night I guess”

Over time the nightmares faded, he became more comfortable around everyone. Happier even.

The first time you saw him naked you couldn’t take your eyes off of him. You had walked into his bedroom - he was fresh out of the shower his hair dropping little droplets onto his broad soft back, he took his towel away from his hips in one swift motion causing your brain to fry up.

“I’m huh sor-Jesus Bucky you’re hu-shit I shouldn’t be seeing this, sor-I’m gonna go”

Leaving once again but not before taking one more cheeky look.

That went on for six months until one day you went to his room to check up on him noticing he wasn’t there you went to the gym, not there. Kitchen, not there. Briefing room, not there. You saw Tony walking past so you asked him but he didn’t tell you. You asked Sam, no reply. You asked Nat but she just carried on texting on her phone. So you went to find Steve but just like with Bucky you was coming up empty.

“He’s probably ventured outside finally” you told yourself as you waited for him in his room.

And you kept on waiting, and waiting and waiting.

It had been two and a half years since you last saw him. Nobody around you even talked about him despite you always asking them where he had gone or if he was okay.

It was like he was never there in the first place.

Steve ran past you as you was taking your daily stroll through the corridors, normally you would have followed him but since you had fell out with him you continued you stroll.

You did your first lap and were walking back towards the kitchen when you heard a familiar voice.

“-I’m okay, they got rid of my trigger words”

“I’m glad pal, you seem a lot happier. How was Wakanda?”

“It was good had my own little hut and had some goats” he chuckles, Steve joining in.

You did have to agree with Steve, Bucky looked happier. Healthier.

“Bucky” you whispered.

Bucky’s eyes flicked away from Steve to over to where you were standing.

The two of you stare at each other, you not daring to move and him just looking at you that was until Steve broke the spell between you two.

“Buck? You alright?”

“I-um yeah” his eyes go to Steve and then back to the woman who was standing there. His eyebrows burrow in confusion as she wasn’t there anymore. “Hey Steve is there another person now a part of the team?”

“No why?”

“So who was that woman then?”

“What woman?” Steve asks as he turns around to look what Bucky was staring at.

Bucky then describes you and waits for Steve to answer.

“Buck there’s no one here fitting that description…”

“Oh.”

“Are you alright pal?”

“Yeah, no I’m fine” He forces a smile.

For the first time in 15 years someone’s finally seen and heard you, going through all these years with no communication with anyone or having someone look at you and not through you had gotten easier as time went on. The first two years were extremely difficult and painful. You couldn’t understand why the construction crew was ignoring you and not listening to your pleading.

A year into the development of the huge building that was Stark Tower and now better known as Avengers Tower the building came to a halt when one of the workers screamed ‘we’ve found a body’, like everyone else you ran over to investigate. The burnt skeleton remains were taken away and two weeks later you heard the crew talking about the body-

“Apparently her name was Y/n L/n, died in the fire last year” Bobby the foreman said.

You laughed “that’s wrong because I’m right here guys” waving your hands around.

But nobody batted an eye or flinched when you jumped in front of them.

That’s when it dawned on you that you were dead.

You remember the day that you got your memories back from your death and it was all thanks to the bad guys who had attacked the tower.

*5 years ago*

The alarms were going off, bright red lights flashing, people were screaming and you was trying to calm them down. Helping Bruce and Nat lead people to safety, away from the destruction. The three of you and those that you was rescuing go down the stairs and Nat opened the door to the ground floor before she slammed it shut again.

“Nat we need to go” Bruce says with panic.

“We-we can’t go that way” she explains.

You knew why, you saw it as she opened the door.

The burning flames were pounding on the door that was stopping it from getting to any of you.

“Bruce we’ve got to go back up!”

Nobody batted an eye as you stumbled back and slid down the wall. Nobody batted an eye as you pulled on your hair muttering something that even you didn’t know under your breath.

They left you behind as you was transported back to 10 years prior.

*10 years before that*

You was sitting in your apartment, knees to your chest, trying to concentrate on what the couple on the screen was saying.

The raised voices coming from your fathers room we’re getting louder and louder as he argued with his girlfriend Lyra, her accusing him of cheating on her which made you laugh since you caught her having sex in the laundry room with the drug dealer that lived two floors up. Since she had no money for his supplies she had to pay in other ways.

Flinching when you heard the sound of skin hitting skin and closing your eyes tightly when you heard Lyra scream out. Your father always had a temper especially when he was drinking and since he had been laid off from the factory, drinking was all he did. A small vile part of you was happy that Lyra was around as it meant he no longer hit you, the abuse you suffered from the hands of your father started a week after your mother left him for another man, leaving you behind.

Lyra came running out of the bedroom with tears streaming down her cheeks as the welt was already forming, your father soon following holding two lit candles in his hands he threw the first one and the next.

The next thing you knew was that the apartment you had grown up in was in flames. You was rooted in fear at not only the fire but as Lyra screaming at you to leave despite her being attacked by your father.

The fire had spread quickly throughout the apartment complex, screams and chaos all around you. You kept going down the stairs until you found yourself in the basement, with no idea of why you was down there, you tried to turn back but the flames pushed you further and further into the normally cold room.

*back to the present*

It scared you that now after 15 years you’ve been a ghost for that someone can now finally see you, it made you smile that it was Bucky that could but the question of why? Why now played on your mind.

Not even the medium who Tony brought in after heard “ghostly noises” couldn’t see or hear you, the “ghostly noises” that Tony heard was just Natasha and Bruce having sex in his lab, you promised the pair you wouldn’t say anything so you didn’t.

So you did the most rational thing. Avoided him.

Which lasted for two weeks until Bucky came onto your territory.

Minding your own business your eyes squinting at the sound of the door opening, hearing Steve’s voice you didn’t think anything of it.

“I’m telling you Buck this is the best place to hide presents, no one ever comes down here” it was true, the last time someone came down here was two agents who was trying to have sex and you wasn’t going to have that. People coming into your home and trying to do the nasty, absolutely not! So you started messing with the pipes and banging objects, causing them to stop and the woman getting scared, she ended up running away leaving the man who started calling her nasty names. He became your enemy. Not like you could actually do anything to him but the statement still stood.

“If you say so punk”.

“I do say so.”

“Here grab these so I can get the rest”

With Steve leaving it was just you and Bucky in the basement now.

“Oh, hi I didn’t see you there” Bucky says.

“Yo-you can actually see me?”

“Yes…why aren’t I suppose to?”

“No”

“Why?”

“Because I’m a ghost”

Both of his eyebrows shoot up and he starts laughing “of course you are”

“No I actually am.”

“Yeah yeah, is this a prank that the spider kid has put you up to?”

“His name is Peter and no it’s not a pra-“

“Hey Buck who are you talking to?” Steve asks as he comes back in with more gift bags.

“Her” Bucky points over to where you stand.

“Bucky there’s no one there…”

“See I told you!” You say with your arms crossed.

“B-but”

“Look he can’t see me, even if I do this” You moved away from the wall and jumped in front of Steve who of course looks straight through you. “You’re the only one for some reason”.

Bucky pales, “but how?”

“Buck?”

“I-I need to go”

Both you and Steve watch him run up the steps and away from you.

“You know Steve, I didn’t expect him to have that kind of reac-oh yeah no its fine to leave it wasn’t like I was finished talking.”

For three weeks you kept you kept yourself isolated in the basement not knowing what it meant now that someone could see and hear you even if it was just Bucky.

Over the past 12 or 13 years you kept yourself to a routine but since Bucky had ruined that for you, you kept yourself occupied - okay you was going slightly insane.

Not realising that the door had come open you was completely unaware that Bucky was standing there watching you-

“Okay so the first order of business is that we need to take out the bad men who call themselves “The trash” in order to succeed we need strong men and women who will lay down their lif-“

You’re cut off by a laugh; you turn and see Bucky who winces at your screams.

“Sorry, sorry I didn’t mean to scare you”

“W-what are you doing here?”

“Were you talking to the mops and buckets?” He asks ignoring your question.

“That’s completely unrelated. What are you doing here?”

“You was weren’t you, hey don’t stop on my account you’ve got to finish your speech or they’ll leave”

“Yo-you’re making fun of me. Stop it” you mumble

“No I’m not, I’m just saying carry on with talking to the mops-oh is that a broom?”

“L-leave now please”

“Aw come on I’m only joking”

“I don’t find it funny, now leave”

He watches as you turn your back to him as you bring your hand up to your face, suddenly feeling guilty.

“Hey doll I’m sorry, I-I was trying to joke with you but it wasn’t funny I’m sorry”

“Whatever just leave”

Bucky listens and complies but as he reaches the top step he turns round and walks back down to you.

“D-doll I really am sorry. I just wanted to talk to you, I’ve been looking around for you and I figured I’d find you here”

“Y-you’ve been looking for me? Why?”

“Well I wanted to ask you some questions” he rubs the back of his neck with his left hand.

“Your arm…”

“Huh? Oh yeah it was a gift from Shuri, do you like it?”

“It’s very pretty” you say with a slight blush.

“Thank you” he too blushes.

“You said you had some questions?”

“Yeah, is it okay if I sit?” Pointing to an old couch that Tony had brought down many years ago.

“Of course”

Watching him sit on the dusty old thing brought a slight smile to your face.

“Are you going to sit?”

“Yep” taking the seat on the end and on the edge.

“So, you’re a ghost?”

“Yep”

“So, you’re dead?”

“Yep”

“When?”

“15 years ago”

“How?”

“Fire”

“Where?”

“Here”

“What?”

“My apartment complex was here before the tower was”

“Oh”

“Yep”

A semi uncomfortable silence fell between you two. He shifted and rubbed his hands on his thighs whilst you twiddled your thumbs.

Bucky broke the silence “how long have you been around us all?”

“Since more and more people came to the tower”

“Oh.”

“Yep”

Silence fell once again but this time lasted a good 20 minutes. 20 slow and painful minutes.

“H-how come you’re not in like heaven or hell?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Isn’t there any other ghosts you could ask?”

“There’s been a few over the years but none of them ever had any answers for me”

“May-maybe you need to do something or have something done to move you on?” Bucky shrugs.

“Like what?”

“I’m not sure. How did the fire start do you know?”

“My father” when he gave you a questioning yet shocked look you explained everything that you remembered that day.

“I’m so sorry ghosty”

“Ghosty?” You burst out laughing.

“Yeah well I don’t know your name so…ghosty”

“Y/n”

Watching as his lips form your name sent imaginary chills down your spine.

“Y/n, I like it, did your dad go prison?”

“No why?”

“Maybe that’s why you’re still stuck here. I can help y-“

“But I don’t want to move on.” Cutting him off.

“Why?”

“Because then that means I’ll be dead”

“But doll, you are”

Standing up so you can pace around the small area “I know that but if I move on it will mean I’m dead dead you know?”

“But why? You’ve spent that past 15 years with no one seeing or hearing you. You really want to do another 15?”

“And another 15 after that if it means I get to be around people and I don’t have to be alone, I don’t want to be just gone and Bucky I’m not hurting anyone I swear!” You shouted at him, your last words more quieter, more like a whimper.

Finally admitting it to someone else hurt, admitting that you would rather keep being ignored and never seen by anyone ever again was better than being alone and dead. And yes whilst you was technically alone it wasn’t the same, you got to be around people, listened to their jokes or stories, listened to their complaints or worries. You was happy to continue to be a shoulder for them to cry on even if they didn’t know you was there or couldn’t hear you words of encouragement and advice.

And it was true what you had said to him, you wasn’t hurting anyone. You couldn’t even imagine of causing another person any form of pain, even when you was alive.

“Dol-no Y/n come back!”

Bucky was angry with himself. The first time he got to speak to her properly, he ruined it. The pain in her voice when she told him she didn’t want to be alone tugged on his heart.

He went to the basement at least eight times a day to apologise but she was never there. He knew that if anyone was walking down the corridor leading to the basement they’d be able to hear him talking to himself.

He walked with purpose down the corridor to Sam’s room, knocking on the door he grew impatient at how long it was taking Sam to answer, it had only been 5 seconds.

“What’s up Buck?”

“One I told you not to call me that. Two I need the computer thing”

“It’s called a laptop Buck”

“Don’t call me that. And can I have it”

“Sure you can Buck let me go and grab it for you Buck”

“I’m going to kill you in a minute”

“Of course you are Buck, here” Sam laughs giving him the laptop before shutting the door in his face.

Going back into his bedroom he goes on the internet just like Peter had showed him, he first typed in ‘Stark Tower fire’ coming up with all different things. Then he typed in ‘before Stark Tower fire’ which had only confused him more. Trying one more time he typed ‘Stark Tower apartment fire’ bingo!

Clicking on the first link showed him the apartment before the fire, during and after. He learned that the complex housed lower income families, that the fire was deemed as an accident due to faulty electrical systems.

Scrolling down further he stopped. The photo of you that he assumed was from school was there, the girl in the photo smiling back to him and next to it read ‘Y/n L/n died in apartment fire one week away from her 21st birthday. Her body has yet to be found’ and just a little bit further down was another link that read ‘Y/n L/n was found 1 year after the tragedy of the fire’ clicking on it he read more, how the construction crew had found her and how scientists confirmed that it was the body of Y/n’s. A photo was underneath the headline that showed the crew, Bucky had to do a double take when he saw you. Sitting on the floor looking out of frame with what Bucky thought was tears on your face.

Taking the laptop with him he ran to Steve’s room, rapidly knocking until the blonde answered.

“Buck? What’s wrong?” Steve says whilst rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

Walking straight past his friend he goes to sit on the bed “come here and look”

Listening Steve sits next to him “when was this?”

“14 years ago but look, there’s that girl I described to you” pointing and looking up at Steve who scrunched up his eyebrows.

“Buck I can’t see anything…”

“Pretty girl on the ground looks like she’s crying”

“Bucky are you alright? You’ve not been the same since you came back from Wakanda. I can ask King T’Challa if you can go ba-“

“Steve listen okay this girl she’s dead. She died 15 years ago and I can see her, I’m the only one that can and I don’t know why bu-but I never saw her before until I came back-“

“Buck slow dow-“

“-but I ruined it between us and now I can’t see her anywhere I keep looking I do Stevie but she won’t appear no matter how much I beg her too an-and I think she hates me”

“Bucky please slow down! Tell me everything but slowly”

So he does.

Steve sits there dumbfounded by what his best friend is telling him, and the craziest part of it was is that he believes every word coming out of his mouth.

“Okay, let’s try and think of a plan together”

And they do.

The next day Bucky makes his way back to the basement when he hears your voice softly seeping underneath the door his heart skips.

“-I’m not sure” silence “maybe I should let him help me so I can move on” more silence “I’m just scared though”

“Y/n?”

“Bucky?”

“Hi um who are you talking to?”

“Just myself, so I came to a conclusion that I want you to help me move on. I’m ready and it’s time”

Bucky notices that there’s a slight hesitation in your words and he spots the way you gulp at the end of your sentence. “Well I have a better idea, I did a lot of research last night and I found out that you don’t have a headstone so I tho-“

“I don’t have a headstone?” You whisper.

It’s now his turn to gulp “No doll, it’s an unmarked grave but I know exactly where it is, where you are” He rephrases.

“Why? Why don’t I have one?”

Oh he hates it. He hates how small you sound; he doesn’t like how you’re twisting your fingers together. “I-I’m not sure doll” That was a lie.

Neither of your parents wanted to spend money on a funeral or a proper burial for you, so it was up to the county to do it.

“Is-is that why am not dead-dead?”

“I’m not sure, it might be… but listen I’m going to get you a headstone - a real nice one, and if-if you want you’ll always be able to go there and Y/n please don’t think I want you to leave because I don’t okay, I really don’t I just want you to find peace”

“I-you don’t have to do that Bucky, it’s a lot of money and I’m not worth a single penny”

Now his heart cracks. “Don’t say that, you’re worth it don’t worry” he smiles which doesn’t reach his eyes.

“It’s okay honestly I think there’s more of an easier, less expensive way to get rid of me. All we have to do is think”

“Y/n-“

“Come on we need to think”

“Doll there’s no need to think about anything, I’ve already gone through with my plan.”

“What?”

“The headstones being made as we speak and Steve’s getting everyone on board.”

The way your eyes bulge out would have made him laugh but he wills himself not to.

“Wh-what’s going on?”

“Sit and I’ll tell you” he smiles as both of you sit on the couch.

On the other side of the compound the rest of the team sit with amusement written over their faces as Steve tell them about Bucky and his ghost friend.

“You two have lost the plot” Sam laughs.

“Would you two be able to be put into an old people’s home?” Nat wonders out loud.

“Probably as they’re both over 100” Tony retorts to Nat.

“Guys I’m being serious” Steve says with his hands on his hips.

“Wait when did you say the fire was?” Tony asks him.

“15 years ago”

“I remember that, there was only one person that died - many were injured weren’t there?”

“Yeah. Y/n was the unfortunate one”

“And she’s been here ever since?”

“Yes”

“So she knows us?”

“Yes. Look let me ring Bucky and get him to bring her up here and we’ll ask questions that no one else would know apart from her and see if she was around at that time”

The team nods so that’s exactly what he does.

“Doll we’re needed upstairs, the team don’t exactly believe me or Steve so they’re going to ask questions and see if you was there or not, is that okay with you?”

“Okay”

The both of you head upstairs and for some reason you’re nervous, something that you’ve never been when around any of them.

“So Barnes, Rogers here tells us that you can see ghosts?” Tony starts.

“Ghost. Just one” he answers. “Okay ask your questions”

“Where exactly are we looking?” Sam now asks.

Bucky gestures to where you stand and obviously all they see is nothing.

“Okay, I’ll play along. Little ghost was you there when I created my iron man suit?”

“She said no”

“Was it you who made ghostly noises?”

Bucky struggles not to laugh “she said no”

“Wait why are you laughing?”

“Because she told me who it was and umm Tony they weren’t ghostly noises”

“What were they then?”

“Sounds of pleasure” Bucky says as he winks at Bruce.

The team start laughing at Bruce’s bright red cheeks and when they notice Nat sinking further into her chair their laughs becomes louder.

“Okay okay I want to ask the ghost something next” Sam laughs.

“Her name is Y/n”

“Okay Y/n what’s my nightly routine?”

“I’m not saying that!” - “No Y/n” - “please don’t make me say it!” - “godsake fine! Sam your nightly routine is you have a shower, brush your teeth, you do 50 push ups whilst na-naked and then -I think I’m going to be sick- you wank off before going to sleep”

“Ah yes! I believe them, Hi Y/n”

“She says hi”

The questions continued for well over an hour, the team finally believing that she was-

“Holy fucking shit!” Tony shouts.

“What? Oh”

“Fuck”

Bucky looked at Y/n who was staring at him with a confused expression which he just shrugs his shoulders. “What’s going on?”

“I’m not sure, guys what’s up?”

“W-we can fucking see her!” Sam shouts.

“What?”

“We can see her Barnes!”

It was true. They could all see you.

“H-how?” You stumble out, after all these years of being invisible and being unheard from everyone around you and all its took is for everyone to believe that you actually exist.

“I-we don’t know. This is crazy even for me” Tony says.

“You can hear me?”

“Yes sweetheart”

Months went by, you was now able to leave the compound by visiting the cemetery. You was there alongside the Avengers when your headstone was placed, each member placed a rose on the grave all giving you a small smile.

It took you some time to get use to being seen and heard, no more conversations with yourself as someone was always around to answer.

Yours and Bucky’s friendship grew, it would be a lie if you said you didn’t have a crush on him. And unknown to you he had a crush on you too. It hurt both of you because you knew it wouldn’t be able to work for the two of you with the main reason being that you were dead.

It was the anniversary of your death Bucky and Steve were on a mission which Bucky wasn’t happy about. You was walking down the corridor when Wanda ran out of her room shouting your name.

“Jesus Christ Wanda don’t do that again!” You scolded, still not use to the whole they could see you now thing.

“Sorry” she chuckled.

“It’s fine what’s wrong?”

“Nothings wrong, its just-its better if I show you”

Frowning you followed her back to her room. “Wanda what’s going on?”

“So I’ve been working on something, for you-“

“For me?”

“Yes and I think I’ve managed to figure out a way to bring you back to life”

Blinking once, twice, you burst out laughing.

“Wanda that’s impossible”

“Not really…just come over here and let’s see if it works and if it doesn’t I’ll try again okay”

Doing as she says you stand in the middle of her room eyebrows raising as her fingers start to glow.

Nothing happens.

“H-how do you feel?” She asks hopefully.

“The same way I’ve felt for the past 15 years Wand, dead.”

Sighing in defeat “I’m so sorry Y/n I’ll keep try-“. Her words are cut off by a deep growl.

“W-what was that?” You stutter out.

“FRIDAY how many heartbeats are in my room?”

“Two Miss Maximoff”

“Who’s?”

“Yours and Miss Y/n’s”

“Catch” Wanda says as a book comes flying at you.

Wanda and you stand there facing each other with wide eyes. You caught the book.

“Oh my god. Wan-Wanda it worked”

After both screaming and crying your taken down to Bruce’s lab where your examined and blood, yes blood, was drawn.

Nobody could believe it and neither could you either but somehow Wanda brought you back to the land of the living.

Everyone promised not to say anything to Bucky as you wanted to surprise him.

A week later on your birthday Bucky and Steve came back from a successful mission. In that week Nat and Sam had to go and do three food shops as you kept eating everything. What can I say you’d been dead for 15 years.

You and the team was waiting on the hanger for them to exit the quinjet. Steve was out first shortly followed by a very tired Bucky but as soon as his eyes found yours he smiled hugely.

“Hey Y/n I’ve miss-“

You cut him off by throwing your arms around his neck. Bucky stiffened at first not believing it was really happening then he wrapped his arms around your waist pulling your further in.

“H-how?”

“Wanda”

“Oh”

After Tony coughed making the pair of you pull apart you - mainly Wanda - explained everything to the two super soldiers. Bucky refusing to let go of you completely. Steve smiled and gave you a small hug.

Much later that night you and Bucky was sitting on his bed with his arm around you when he abruptly stood up.

“Where are you going?”

“There’s ten minutes left of your birthday so we’re going to dance”

You watched with an amused smile as he turned the stereo on.

“I got Peter to do this when we was watching the telly earlier” he smiled.

Unchained Melody by The Righteous Brothers started playing through the speakers.

“Y-you remembered?”

“Of course I did doll, it’s your favourite song how would I forget”

Slow dancing in the middle of Bucky’s room with your favourite song playing in the background on your birthday made this the best birthday you ever had.

“I need your love, I need your love, God speed your love to me”

Bucky sings just as his lips touch yours.

~ banner credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

Tags: @imcinnamoons | @pigeonmama

338 notes · View notes

topguncortez · 11 months

Text

Speak Now ~ J. Seresin

Hangman Masterlist | Main Masterlist

synopsis: Jake gets a wedding invite from the girl he's still in love with. Based off of Speak Now (TV) by Taylor Swift

word count: 4.1k

warnings: cursing, break-ups, runaway bride, miscommunication

Jake knew you probably hated the invites. You had told him over and over that you never wanted a big wedding, you wanted something small. You had agreed with your mom to not just go to the courthouse, but would at least do something a little bigger. Jake ran his fingers over the pale pink paper that was decorated with flowers and had your name and your fiancé’s name written in gold cursive letters. He knew you were somewhere screaming and pulling your hair out.

‘PLEASE JOIN US FOR THE CEREMONY OF MATRIMONY OF Y/N M/N AND BILLY “FRITZ” AVALON’

“Yeah, I just got it,” Jake said to Coyote. He had called his best friend the moment he saw the light pink envelope in his mailbox, “I looked up the address, it’s a church. She always said she wouldn’t get married in a church, she was worried it would burn down around her,”

“I don’t think that’s possible,” Javy said, “She must be a different person now, when was the last time you talked to her?”

“I don’t know 2-3 years ago. I heard Bob ask Nat if she had figured out a bridesmaid dress yet,” Jake sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, “I guess it was for this.”

“Did you expect anything less? They’re best friends.”

Jake shrugged knowing his friend couldn’t see him, “I don’t think I’m gonna go,”

“You can’t do that!”

“Why would I go? To submit myself to the torture of watching her marry someone else? Watching someone else give her the life I couldn’t give her?” Jake said angrily, the images of their last fight filled his mind. He looked over to the front door from his kitchen, the replay of you walking out the door, with your bags packed and tears in your eyes was forever burned into his mind.

“You pushed her away, Jacob. You can only blame yourself for that,” Javy scolded and Jake sighed.

“I thought I was doing the right thing,” Jake mumbled.

“Well do the true right thing, and go to the wedding, for her. It’ll make her happy to see you there,” Javy said and Jake told him he’d think about it.

Jake sat down on his couch and closed his eyes. Ever since that fateful day, he let you go, he couldn’t fathom thinking about you with someone else. He knew though, he knew you had met someone else, but didn’t know it was Fritz until about a month ago. The two of you waltzed into the Hard Deck, hand-in-hand, smiles on your face. Jake couldn’t stand the sight of it. It made him physically ill to stand there and keep a smile on his face. You had caught only a glimpse of him as he walked out the door.

Jake pushed himself off of his spot and walked to his room. He pulled down the box that sat on the top shelf of his closet and opened the lid. Pictures, concert tickets, notes, mixed CDs, random t-shirts, and postcards were all packed away in the box. Jake dug to the bottom of the box and pulled out the tiny light blue ring box and opened it. The pear-shaped diamond ring glared up at him in mockery.

———————————————

“Have you ever thought about the future?” You asked him, as you were both relaxing in the bathtub. Jake had a stressful day at work and just wanted to relax. You had made him something to eat and draw a bath.

“Of course,” Jake said, kissing your bare shoulder, “I think about it a lot, what I’m doing next week, or next month, or even next year,”

“Do you ever think of our future?” You asked softly.

“I-I uh, yeah sometimes. But I like where we are,” Jake said and you frowned slightly. You had been with Jake since freshman year of high school, right by his side through it all. From giving up your dream of going to UT, and moving to Maryland while he went to the academy, to waiting with other partners and spouses for him to come off the carrier after a deployment. You loved Jake, you really did, but you were hoping for more, you wanted more.

“I think about getting married,” You said and sighed into Jake, “Something small, probably in my parents’ backyard on a beautiful summer night. I want that perfect day, where you just wake up and say, ‘Let’s get married’, nothing too crazy. I told my mom I won’t just go to the courthouse.”

“Yeah,” was all Jake could say.

“What?” You asked, turning your head to look at him, “You don’t… you don’t see that?”

“It’s not that I don’t see it, it’s that I don’t want it.”

“Oh,” You nodded. There was a beat of silence, until you pushed yourself up from Jake’s embrace.

“Wait, Y/N,” Jake said reaching out to you as you grabbed your towel.

“The water is getting cold,” You said and dried yourself off, before heading into the bathroom.

Jake cursed himself and got out of the bathtub, grabbing his towel and following you. You sat on the bed and looked at Jake with tears in your eyes. You had this sinking feeling for a while. Like things were bound to break between you. You loved Jake, you really did, and every day it felt like you were falling more in love with him. He always did something new to make you fall in love. Whether it was surprising you with some new recipe, bringing you home your favorite flowers, to sending you postcards from where ever he was in the world. But lately, all that had seemed to stop. You had slowly wondered if maybe, just maybe, Jake wasn’t in love with you anymore.

“Y/N…” Jake said your name softly.

“When did you fall out of love?”

“What-“

“Jake, please,” You asked him, tears now running down your face.

“I love you, Y/N, I really do. But I- My career is just starting to take off. I. . .,” Jake sighed, “I- I don’t want to be holding you back from everything that you want.”

“You don’t want to hold me back, or you don’t want me holding YOU back?”

Jake sighed and looked down at his feet. Truth was, he didn’t want to hold you back. He could see the small changes in you. You had decided to change your major from education to business, something that you insisted was what you wanted. He noticed that your grades had slipped, your GPA the lowest it had ever been. You had spent more time at home, next to him, than hanging out with your friends. Jake didn’t want to hurt you, but he wanted you to follow your dreams, even if that meant having to break his and your heart. Jake took a deep breath and grabbed your hands.

“I’m breaking up with you,” He said and bit the bullet. You closed your eyes and Jake was fighting the urge to wipe the tears from your eyes. A sob left your pink lips and you pulled your hands from his, “I’m sorry-“

“Just shut up, Jake,” You said and pushed yourself up from the bed. You walked into the bathroom and slammed it shut, locking the door behind you. You gripped the sides of the sink and sobbed. Jake listened on the other side of the door as you threw everything off the counter, and could hear the breaking of the mirror as you threw a hairbrush at it. Jake changed into his pajamas and then set some out for you. He wrote a note that he was going to stay at Josh’s for the night.

The next morning you woke up to a cold bed and a pounding headache. You looked around the empty room and sighed. You began with the closet, dumping all your clothes into your suitcase, leaving behind the stuff that Jake had either bought you or gifted you. You packed away all your underwear, socks, and makeup. The apartment slowly became bare as you packed your little trinkets and decorations away. You had hoped to get most of it done before Jake came back, but you weren’t that lucky.

“Where are you going?” Jake asked, walking into the apartment and seeing your bags by the front door.

“My sister’s house,” You said and Jake looked at you confused. This was the first time you had mentioned a sister, and he had been dating you for over 5 years, “You don’t know her, she’s a half-sister,”

“Okay… this is really it?”

“Yeah,” You said softly as you looked down at the item in your hand, a picture from your first date, taken when you were both 13. Your parents wouldn’t let you go alone, so Jake’s older sister and her boyfriend at the time had to tag along. She took the picture and Jake gave it to you as a gift on your first anniversary, “Here,” You handed Jake the picture.

“No, no, keep it.”

“I can’t,” You said, your voice breaking. You placed your hand on Jake’s cheek, and kissed his lips softly, one last time, “Goodbye, Jake. Be good to yourself, okay?”

“I will, Y/N. I love you,”

You couldn’t bring yourself to say it back, as you grabbed your bags and walked out the front door. Jake bit his lip as he watched you walk out the door and out of his life.

———————————-

You looked half dead, as you sat in the makeup chair, bright and early on your wedding day. You had tried to go to sleep, but you tossed and turned the whole night. You had thought about running away, getting your car, and driving off to god knows where, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. Instead, you took some melatonin and slept for about 4 hours, until Natasha burst through your door with her unusually high amount of energy. You were just happy she brought you red bull and donuts.

“You look like shit?” Natasha said as she poured you a mimosa.

“I feel like it,” you reached your hand out for the glass.

“Oh my god,” She said and pulled the glass back, “Are you pregnant?!”

“No!” You yelled, “Give me the damn drink,”

“Fiesty,” She laughed and handed you the glass, “I steamed your dress, it’s hanging up in the bathroom,”

“Thank you,” You answered, “The boys?”

“I talked to Billy’s brother, Steven, he said they are up and moving. But, if you were wondering Rooster said that they are ALL on their way,”

“He’s coming?”

Natasha gave you a small smile and nodded, before going over to where the rest of your bridesmaids were. You looked up at your makeup artist and smiled as she placed false eyelashes on your eyes. You had tried to keep yourself from shaking with anxiety over seeing Jake, but you couldn’t help it. You had brushed it off as wedding day jitters. For the rest of the morning, you and your bridesmaids drank and ate a light breakfast that your parents had provided. You had a photographer taking pictures of you guys as you got ready. The bridesmaid dresses you had picked were emerald green, and you let them pick their own design. You sucked in a breath, as Natasha zipped the back of your dress. You stared at yourself in the mirror, and could hardly recognize the person in the mirror. The dress you and Billy had picked out was a classic style dress, with a deep v-cut, lace sleeves that went down to your wrists, and an open back. Billy said you looked like Princess Kate, but you felt more like Princess Di.

“Absolutely breathtaking,” Natasha said and You smiled, trying to make yourself feel better, “They want a first look. You okay with that?”

“I mean, Billy picked the dress out, so why not,”

Natasha smiled and walked out of the bedroom. You blinked and stared up at the ceiling, trying not to cry. You took a deep breath and then headed out of the bathroom. You looked up from your shoes to be shocked by the 3 men standing in front of you, one noticeably missing.

“Well god damn, Y/N, you can clean up nicely,” Javy said You laughed and walked over and hugged him.

“Like our very own princess,” Bob said.

“Thank you,” You said looking at all of them. You could feel a certain pair of blue eyes burning into you, “I can’t believe you guys actually came!”

“Well, my girlfriend is your maid of honor,” Javy said, putting his arm around Natasha’s waist.

“She’s the best maid of honor I could ask for,” You smiled at her.

“Speaking of which, we gotta get going. Can’t be late for your own wedding,” Natasha said and your face faltered.

“Yeah,” You said hoping none of them noticed the change in your demeanor, of course the oldest twin did.

“Alright, let’s get going okay,” Natasha said and the boys nodded, following her out of the room, all except Bob who hung back a second.

“You look amazing,” Bob said, “He would be here, but he just couldn’t see you quite yet.”

“Thank you, Bob,” You said honestly. He kissed your cheek and then left your room.

“You ready?” Natasha asked, coming back into the room. You nodded and grabbed the champagne bottle that was next to you. Natasha watched with wide eyes as you downed the rest of the bottle, “Liquid courage?”

“If I do something dumb, you promise to support me?”

Natasha squinted her eyes at you, “Depends on what dumb thing you’re thinking about doing.”

“We’ll have to see,”

The church was decorated beautifully, white roses and emerald green flowers were mixed in and decorated the altar. Javy sat on Jake’s right and Rooster on the left. Jake’s eyes were locked on his shoes as Billy and his parents made their way down the aisle. Rooster nudged him as your mom and brother made their way down the aisle. Your mom sent Jake a warm smile, making his heart beat faster in his chest. The look in her eyes was one that Jake had seen far too often.

‘That should be you.’

“What if I stop the wedding?” Jake asked Javy.

“Don’t even think about it Jacob,” Javy whispered harshly.

“You saw how unhappy she is!”

“She’s nervous, it’s her damn wedding day!” Javy snapped.

“Stop, Natasha is walking down,” Bob said noticing his WSO walking down with your fiancé’s brother. Natasha winked at the boys, as she took her spot right next to wear you would stand at the alter.

Jake’s heart fell to his ass as he heard that oh-so-familiar wedding march and everyone stood up, to look to the back of the church. The doors opened Jake’s breath caught in his throat. You were breathtaking, the dress hugging your body perfectly. Jake couldn’t help but wish that was for him. Your eyes were locked on Billy, as tears left his eyes. You had tried to dig deep in your heart and remember why you were going to marry him, but everything was drawing up a blank. The aisle felt like it was miles long, and you hated everyone’s eyes on you. When you got to the end of the aisle, Billy stepped down to take you from your father.

“Who gives this woman, to this man?” The priest asked.

“Her mother, and I,” Your dad said. He turned to you and hugged you, “Jake is here,” You went to move your head to look for him but your dad kept you from moving, “Make the right choice,” You nodded and kissed his cheek before pulling back and stepping up on the altar.

“Ladies and gentlemen, you maybe be seated,” The priest said and You handed Natasha your bouquet, your eyes searching the crowd of people, and finally landing on those familiar brown eyes, “Welcome, we are gathered here today to witness the symbolic ceremony of love between these two young people, Y/N M/N L/N and Billy Fritz Avalon. Is there anybody who believes that these two shouldn’t be married, speak now or forever hold your peace,”

Y/N closed her eyes and waited for someone to say something. Jake was about to stand before Javy grabbed his arm and held him down. He looked at his wingman with wide eyes, but the boy just shook his head and pointed toward you. Jake looked at you and locked eyes with him, as the priest was reading some passage about marriage and what it means in the Bible. Jake could read it in your eyes, you were really going through with this. Jake saw his window of opportunity finally close and the stages of grief started settling in his chest. He leaned back against the pew and tried to keep from crying.

“Billy, do you take Y/N, to have and to hold, to honor and treasure, to be at her side in sorrow and in joy, in the good times and bad, in sickness and health, for rich or for poor, to love and cherish her always until the moment of your last breath?”

“I do,” Billy said giving your hand a squeeze.

“Y/N,” The priest said, basically startling you, “Do you take Billy, to have and to hold, to honor and treasure, to be at his side in sorrow and in joy, in the good times and bad, in sickness and death, for rich or for poor, to love and cherish him always until the moment of your last breath?”

You looked at the priest and then at Billy, “I…,” You quickly glanced over to Jake, whose green eyes were locked on you. You swallowed and looked back at Billy, “I-”

“No,” A voice from the crowd spoke. You snapped your head towards the audience, seeing Jake standing up and the look of shock on everyone’s face.

“Hangman, what the,” Billy asked, dropping your hands and turning towards him.

“You never wanted to get married in a Church,” Jake said, pushing past Rooster and Bob, to stand in the middle of the aisle, “You said the church of Elvis was fine, but nothing like. . . this,” Jake gestured around, “You want the wedding where you wake up and say ‘let’s get married’. You want to eat hot dogs and mac’n’cheese in your parents’ backyard and light off fireworks.”

Tears gathered in your eyes as Jake stepped closer to you, and you took a step down from the altar.

“You want to jump off the dock at the lake house in your wedding dress because the lake has good luck in it and you believe in that stuff,” Jake licked his lips, “This isn’t you. . .” You nodded and Jake wiped away a stray tear with his thumb, “What do you say? Wanna get out of here?”

“Yes please,” You said, as you grabbed Jake’s hand. The church erupted in chaos as the two of you ran towards the doors.

“The hell did you say to her!?” Your mom asked your father, hitting him lightly on the chest.

“I just told her to make the right choice,” Your dad said smugly, “Never liked Buster anyway.”

“It’s Billy!”

You and Jake were bursting with laughter as you sprinted to his car. Jake had helped gather your dress in the car, before shutting the door carefully and jumping into the driver’s seat. Neither of you guys said anything as you drove away from the church. You weren’t sure where you were driving to, and it honestly didn’t matter. You looked over at Jake, who had a smile on his face as he grabbed your hand, and kissed your knuckles.

But suddenly, the fate of the decision hit you like a ton of bricks.

“Stop the car,” You said.

Jake looked over at you, “What?”

“Stop the damn car!” You yelled. Jake complied and pulled the car over, putting it in park. You got out instantly, running towards the woodline, the soft rain falling on you. Jake watched as you tried to catch your breath. He walked to the other side of his BMW, and leaned against the passenger door as you paced.

“I ran away,” You said eyes wide. You turned to face him, “I just ran away from the altar!”

“Yes, you did,” Jake nodded.

“A-and because of you!” You yelled.

“I’m sorry,” Jake said, honestly. Guilt was swimming in his green eyes as you looked at him. He looked as bad as you felt. His suit was wrinkled, his hair slightly a mess from running his hands through it, his five o’clock shadow settling on his face.

“Why? Why did it take you so long?” You asked and Jake looked at you.

“I was scared,” He admitted, “I was scared of coming back and ruining what you had built. You went back to education, got your degree, you’re living your dream, and I…. I didn’t want to get in the way again.”

You shook your head and walked up to him. You grabbed his hand, “Dance with me,”

Jake nodded and turned up the car radio. The sweet sound of Aretha Franklin’s Natural Woman’ filled your eardrums. Jake grabbed you softly and pulled you into him as he swayed with you in the moonlight. You guys lost track of time, as one song faded into the other, and you were both soaked, your dress was ruined.

“Your dress,” Jake said, looking at the dirty train, “I’m sorry, I’ll pay,”

“No, don’t worry about it,” You said and placed your hands on Jake’s face.

Jake’s rough hands carefully gripped the side of your face and pulled his lips against yours. For the first time in nearly 2 years, you were feeling his lips on yours again. You pulled him against you, wanting him to never let you go. He pulled back and rested his forehead against yours. You two didn’t say anything, but you didn’t have to. It was clear, you had made the right choice.

“Marry me,” Jake said and you looked up at him. He reached into his wet suit jacket and pulled out the blue box, “I don’t know what the hell I was thinking, I had this stashed away for the perfect moment but I just got scared. I didn’t want you to put your dreams on the back burner for me, so I let you go.”

“Jake, you dumbass,” You said, “You are my dream.”

“You’re mine too, I can’t believe I almost lost you to-”

“Shh, you have me now.”

“Marry me, please?” Jake asked getting down on one knee. You smiled and tackled him to the ground. He landed with a thud and laughed as he kissed you passionately. You pulled back and slid the ring that was already on your finger, and replaced it with the one Jake had for you, “Looks better.”

“Much better.” You said kissing him again.

3 weeks later, you woke up one morning to a cold bed, but the covers messed up. You looked out the window, seeing the sun shining and making everything glow warmly. You stretched and headed down to your kitchen, where Jake was already making dinner. You greeted him with a kiss and sat down at the table to eat the vegan pancakes he had made.

“We should get married today,” Jake suggested, “Javy got ordained online a couple of months ago and has been itching to use it.”

“My dad’s got a new dinner recipe he wants to try.” You said sipping your orange juice.

“Then it’s settled,” Jake smiled, “Let’s get married today,”

And that’s exactly what you two did. You sent out a text message for everyone to be at your house by 6 for your wedding. Nobody questioned It, knowing this was exactly what you and Jake wanted. Everyone gathered in your backyard, dressed causally for a summer backyard wedding. Jake stood barefoot in the grass as he waited for you to walk out of the house, in a simple white maxi sun dress. Javy was living for this moment to be the official of a wedding, and what better than to be one at his best friend’s wedding?

“Now, we can actually do this right this time,” Javy said winking at you.

“Jake, do you take Y/N-“

“Yes,” Jake said interrupting his brother.

“I have to say the speech, Jacobl,” Javy scolded and everyone chuckled, “Y/N, do you take Jake-“

“I do!” You answered by doing the same.

“You guys are so impatient,” Javy smiled, “Well, by the power vested in me by some officiating website and the state of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Jake, you may now kiss your bride,”

“Don’t gotta tell me twice,”

You giggled as Jake smashed his lips against yours. Cheers were let out from your family as he dipped you and sealed the deal with a kiss. He set you back on your two feet and grabbed your hand, walking you down the makeshift aisle, finally as husband and wife.

taglist: @shanimallina87 @phoenix1388 @desert-fern @mygyn @cherrycola27 @yanna-banana @seitmai @topgun-imagines @bradleybeachbabe @na-ta-sh-aa @startrekfangirl2233 @xoxabs88xox @atarmychick007 @lunamoonbby @sophiaslastbraincell @bradswolfe @fandom-princess-forevermore @thedroneranger @angelbabyange @callsignharper @dempy @lovelywiseprincess @krismdavis @eternallyvenus @dakotakazansky @pono-pura-vida @callsignartemis @starberryhorse @daggersquadphantom @gspenc @toobouquet @dreamgirl3300 @avada-kedavra-bitch-187

taglist form

600 notes · View notes

mviswidow · 10 months

Text

who you are is not where you've been

Blackhill x ex-hydra!daughter!Reader

Word Count: 1.7k

Summary: After a triggering nightmare about R’s past, her mothers comfort her.

Contents: hurt/comfort, dark nightmare, talk of kidnapping, angst, fluff, Nat and Maria being amazing adopted mothers

From this request.

the title is a reference to taylor swift's innocent

You raced after your target as fast as your feet would carry you. The young girl reminded you of yourself when you’d first been brought to Hydra. She fought hard and was determined to get away from you, but it wasn’t long before you’d cornered her in an alleyway with a dead end.

Her cries for help made your ears ring, and you would have given anything for her to just shut up. You could feel guilt weighing heavily on your chest. It was crushing. You were about to confine this little girl to a life of misery, just like your own.

Your body felt like it was on fire, every instinct you had was telling you to turn around and leave her there, to let her go, but you didn’t. You couldn’t. You pointed your gun at her as you dialed a number on a burner phone, giving the person on the other end your location.

The poor girl cried with all her might, tears streaming down her face. You felt like you were going to be sick. You wished she’d been able to get away from you somehow.

She shrank back until she was against the fence behind her just when you felt a hand on your arm. You kept the gun pointed at her steadily as you took a quick glance over your shoulder.

“You’ve done it again, great work.”

You woke from your nap with a start when you heard a beeping sound. Your chest was heaving. You looked around to check your surroundings and your breath started to even out upon realizing you were safe on the living room couch and your moms were in the kitchen making dinner. The microwave had just gone off.

“Hey, sleepyhead,” Natasha came over when she saw that you’d sat up and were awake, running her fingers through your hair tenderly. “You knocked out at the end of the movie. How was your nap?”

“It was okay,” you nodded, avoiding her gaze. “I’m going to wash up before we eat.”

You needed to clear your head before you sat with them for dinner. There was no way they wouldn’t be able to tell something was up and the last thing you wanted to do was to put your problems on them.

Upon locking the door to the bathroom, your eyes began to tear up. You groaned quietly and pressed the heels of your hands to your shut eyes, willing yourself not to cry. You did your best to steady your breathing and stay quiet, but it wasn’t long before you were choking back sobs while sitting on the cold tile floor.

Your dreams were often plagued by the haunting memories of your past, being controlled by Hydra since your early childhood. You were horrified by what you were capable of. It pained you to think that you had subjected kids to being tormented and ruined their lives. They hadn’t done anything to deserve that. And it was often difficult to convince yourself that you deserved to live in the loving household that you now did, because how could you when many of the kids you’d been assigned to capture probably still worked for Hydra?

Your eyes shot open when you heard a quiet knock on the door. You bit down on one of your knuckles, trying to stifle the sob threatening to leave your throat.

“You alright, kiddo?” Maria’s voice sounded.

You didn’t say anything out of fear of embarrassing yourself, afraid of whatever noise would come out.

“Can I come in?”

She took the sound of the door unlocking as a ‘yes’ and opened it slowly, sitting down beside you.

“What’s wrong, hm?” she murmured, putting her strong arm around your shoulders.

You turned into her embrace, wrapping your arms around her waist as tightly as you could while your body racked with sobs.

Maria held you close and pressed a kiss to the top of your head, “I’m right here, sweetheart.”

Natasha’s footsteps went unheard but she made herself known when she put a gentle hand on your back, doing her best to help soothe you.

Your tears fell freely, but the presence of your mothers was beginning to make you feel better. You were getting ahold of your breathing, matching yours to Maria’s.

Once you were calmer, you moved yourself to sit up with your back to the wall and Natasha was now in front of you, tutting when she saw your tear-stained face and your nose red from crying, “What’s got you so upset, honey?” she asked as she leaned forward to wipe your tears away with her thumbs.

You took a couple of breaths before attempting to respond to her, and while you did so, you realized not many people would be able to understand your feelings the way she might.

“How did… how did you forgive yourself?” Your voice broke as you spoke, fresh tears beginning to fall. “After everything I’ve done,” you shook your head. “I don’t deserve - I can’t - I’m a monster -”

“No, hey,” Natasha took your hand in hers before speaking softly, “You’re working yourself up again. Please don’t talk like that.”

You put your head down and pinched the bridge of your nose as Natasha sat in shock for a couple of seconds, surprised by your question.

It wasn’t often that the Black Widow cried, but as she saw you in your distress, reminding her so much of herself, she couldn’t help it when her eyes started watering.

She looked to her wife for a moment, and when their eyes met, it was clear they were thinking the same thing. Maria could not count the number of times she’d heard Natasha describe herself as a monster.

There were many nights Maria had held Natasha as she cried, feeling like she could never make up for everything she had done. She still felt that way sometimes. Like nothing could be enough for all the lives she’d taken or destroyed.

But you? You might be enough. Natasha felt more sure of that every day. The love she had for you consumed her. It came with an innate need to protect you. Getting to love you felt like healing from her past, something she once never thought she’d feel.

You had a long emotional journey ahead of you in order to come to terms with the reality, which was that you were a victim of circumstance, just like Natasha was. Neither of you asked for the hand of cards you were dealt, but you had to play them.

“Why don’t we go to the couch and talk about this there? Let’s get you off the floor,” the redhead suggested, helping you up.

As you made your way to the couch with Natasha, Maria went to the fridge and brought you water, which you took gratefully.

You sat between your mothers, busying yourself by fidgeting with the edges of the blanket, not feeling too inclined to look at them while you felt so vulnerable, preparing yourself to start speaking. “I have a lot of dreams about my time being controlled by Hydra, some can be really bad.”

Your mind raced as you mulled over how much you were going to tell them. You hadn’t spoken very much about what happened to you while you were being controlled by Hydra. You figured they knew enough from reading your file and Natasha being there when you were taken into custody by SHIELD.

Still, there was a lot you didn’t want them to know. You were ashamed of yourself and terrified that they may not look at you the same way after they knew what you’d decided to tell them.

“I was mostly assigned to kidnappings for Hydra,” A lump grew in your throat as you spoke. “I was having a nightmare about this one girl named Marcy, she was the youngest target I ever had. She was also the last.” You could feel the anxiety you were having in every part of your body. You weren’t sure what you expected them to say but the longer they said nothing the more anxious you became.

“You aren’t going to start forgiving yourself until you’re able to acknowledge that what happened was not all your fault,” Natasha finally said, which made your brow furrow.

When you didn’t say anything, she continued, “You know you didn’t do any of the things you did because of your own volition. Hydra was using a formula very similar to the one the Red Room utilized. You weren’t able to make any decisions yourself. Until you’re able to let up on yourself and come to accept this, you won't be forgiving yourself anytime soon.”

You stayed silent for a couple of seconds before nodding, “I’ve never not blamed myself.”

Natasha offered a soft smile, “I know how that feels. It took me a very long time to get to where I am now. And a lot of help from Maria.”

“And you have both of us every step of the way,” Maria chimed in.

Your eyes watered as the corners of your lips turned up, “Thank you. I love you guys so much.”

Natasha pulled you in for a hug and it seemed like she needed it almost as much as you did, “We love you too. More than you know.”

When you pulled away you turned and hugged Maria, “Thanks for finding me.”

The brunette shrugged with a soft smile, “Of course. But next time why don’t you let us know when something’s bothering you? You scared us there.”

“I’ll try my best. I’m still getting used to the whole asking for help thing. I’m sorry.”

“Ehh, that’s alright. We both know what it’s like to be a little emotionally stunted,” Maria snickered.

Natasha rolled her eyes and playfully kicked Maria’s shin, pretending to be annoyed by her comment as you laughed.

Everything was going to be okay.

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #maria hill #maria hill x reader #black widow #mcu #cobie smulders #marvel #scarlett johansson #blackhill #blackhill x reader #blackhill x daughter!reader #natasha romanoff x maria hill #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x daughter!reader #maria hill x daughter!reader #teen!daughter!reader

729 notes · View notes

littlexscarletxwitch · 4 months

Note

Hi, would you be able to do a mutual pining yelena x avenger!reader kinda thing where yelena has been ignoring reader because she doesn’t know to how to deal with her feelings and when reader confronts her, yelena admits that she likes her? Mainly angst with fluff at the end if possible. Love your fics!!

── ༊*·˚⋆ 𝗶 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂

paring: yelena belova x fem!reader

tag(s): fluff, some angst, mutual pinning, nat being the big sis

warning(s): yel having a hard time admitting her feelings, grammatical errors, unedited

word count: 1.8k

note: Soooooo sorry it took me soooo long to post this. I FUCKING LOVED THIS REQUEST btw. Also guys, it's taking me so long to post fic because a) my laptop is just a bitch and won't work, and b) I guess I'm going through a writer's block and it's kinda hard to find the motivation to write. But I'll try my best. Lots of love, M <3

requests are open! + check my rules + masterlist <3

Your legs were sore, you couldn't feel your arms anymore and you were gasping for air, but it wasn’t over until one of you was down.

“Can’t we take a break?” you whined out as you tried dodging Yelena’s fist but still made contact with your body and you groaned out in pain.

“Focus, Y/n,” Steve called out, before Yelena would punch again.

You knew she was holding back, measuring her strength, she always would when training with you. And you didn’t know if you found that reassuring or mocking. You kicked her in the stomach, but it still did not affect her, it was quite the opposite really.

“That’s all you got?”

“Why? Wanna try something else?” you teasingly said while winking at her.

You got her off guard, she wasn’t expecting your cocky self to show up while training, and seized the moment to swift her off her feet and got on top of her.

“Was this what you had in mind?”

Your hands quickly found her wrists while your body pressed into her abdomen pushing her down so she wouldn’t get out of your hold.

“Okay, I think it’s enough,” Steve called out, sensing you had gone off track.

Both you and Yelena knew that she could easily get out of your hold, but still it took her two minutes to do so. You didn’t want to let her go that easily, you felt your whole body burning just by the thought of her skin against yours, still you stood up and got on moving before the two of you could have a say on what just had happened.

That was how it always went with Yelena, one moment you had the courage to openly flirt with her and a second later you would run back to your dorm second guessing the whole interaction. You wanted to do more, each and every time, but she was so nonchalant about you flirting with her that you convinced yourself that it was just that, a flirty friendship.

And most of the time you were okay with it, playing dumb about your own feelings. But then shit like that would happen, you would brush her skin, or would make her laugh, or just look at her, and the thought of a friendship would fly out of your mind. That was why you would lock up in your room, trying to calm and persuade yourself to not let your stupid feelings get in the way.

And the same stupid thing would happen to Yelena, which you didn’t know about.

“You want to talk about it?” Yelena heard her sister's voice as she watched you heading out the training room.

“I wasn’t holding back, I swear.”

“Not about your punching,” she raised her brow at her little sister.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” Yelena shrugged it off as she grabbed her bottle of water and took a big sip.

“Lena, I know you,” Natasha took advantage of the fact that her sister was chugging down water. “I know we don’t do feelings, we don’t trust people. But that was the old us, that was the red room. We have to put that shitty part of our lives behind us for good.”

“And I have,” Yelena scoffed.

“Then why haven't you done something about it?” Yelena knew her sister meant you, she didn’t have to clarify. “At least, give it a go,” Natasha sighed. “If not for you, then for her.”

“She doesn’t—.”

“You never know, Lena. Neither will she, if you don’t tell her,” and with that Natasha left her sister to her own thoughts.

“Suka,” she mumbled under her breath, because Natasha was right. She was always right about everything, it was the power that came with being a big sister—her big sister—, and she hated it when she was right.

She knew she had to do something about it, about you. But the fear of rejection, of feeling unwanted felt too much to bear. She wasn’t going to open up her heart just for someone else to crush it. But maybe, just maybe she could trust you not to crush it.

[...]

Still, it was easier said than done. It took her a full week to finally come to the conclusion that she was, actually, madly in love with you. A week full of stress and anxiety because deep down she felt like she didn’t deserve to have these feelings towards you.

And now that she knew exactly how she felt about you, it fucking terrified her. So she did what she thought was best and put some space in between the two of you. The thought of you clouded her brain and it was starting to affect her line of work, and she couldn’t have that. Being part of the avengers gave her life meaning, and she was not going to let her stupid feelings ruin that for her. Even though she wanted to be close to you, and just melt into your arms.

Of course, her coldness didn’t go unnoticed by you. You were confused, though. It wasn’t like Yelena to just shut you out. Even though you wanted more than just a friendship out of her, you wanted to consider yourself a friend of hers and it hurt that she was just avoiding you.

You didn’t know what was going on, she just felt out of your reach. You asked her sister about it, she just told you to give her space and she would be okay, before muttering something under her breath and went on with her day. You asked Kate and she just completely avoided the topic and changed the subject.

The more she didn’t talk to you, not even glance at your direction, the more you felt like you had done something wrong, maybe she had found out about your feelings and now she was avoiding you because of them. She probably felt uncomfortable about them, she probably wanted nothing to do with you. And who were you to decide otherwise?

You talked to Steve, making sure to not have more training lessons with her, only to find out she had already asked the same thing. You knew it was stupid to feel as if your heart was breaking since you wanted the same thing, but it did feel like shattering to pieces. You just nodded, a tight smile finding its way to your lips and went to your room before shedding any tears.

This whole thing was bullshit. Yes, maybe she didn’t feel the same way you did about her. But the both of you were full grown-ups, you should be professional about it and act like nothing had happened. Because in reality it didn’t, not that you were aware of it. So you decided that you were going to give her a piece of your mind.

You searched for her throughout the entire building and finally found her in the training room. Of course she was there, you should have thought of coming there earlier.

For a trained assassin she didn’t notice your presence, too caught up in her own mind, focusing on her breathing and throwing punches at the boxing bag.

You cleared your throat. “Got a minute?”

She looked over her shoulder, finally acknowledging you there, and you swore you watched as her whole body just tensed up by the sound of your voice.

“I’m kinda busy right now,” she mumbled before throwing two more punches.

“It won’t take long,” you insisted, wanting to get this over with.

“Look, I really need to—.”

You cut her off. “I don’t know who told you or how you found out, but yes, it’s true, okay?” you finally got her attention. “I just thought you would be professional enough to not let this get in the way and pretend like nothing happened. Which is what I also wish for.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You avoiding me,” you quickly mumbled, a tint of concussion in your tone. “I get it, but let’s just put this behind us and act like propper adults.”

“No, I’m aware of that part,” she scoffed, embarrassed to admit to you what she had been up to. “What I mean is, what have I found out?”

Your brows furrowed. “About my… me… and you,” you gave yourself a second to think her words through. “Hold on a second, you don’t know?”

“What don’t I know?”

“You don’t,” you finally added two plus two and realised that Yelena had no recollection whatsoever about your feelings, but still something was off. “Why have you been avoiding me then?”

You watched her as her mouth opened and closed, searching for the right words.

“What did I ever do to you for you to completely avoid me, huh?”

“You did nothing, I just…”

“You just what?” you scoffed, now anger filling your tone. “You just decided it was fun to ignore me?”

“No! God, no.”

“Then what is it?!” the two of you were pretty much screaming at each other.

“Because I like you, damn it!” she finally confessed. “Is it so hard to see?”

Your eyes winded. “You like me? You have been avoiding me because you like me?”

“I know, not my brightest moment. But it's just that you… you just…” she gestured to her brain. “You’re just stuck here, and I can’t get you out. At first I was scared to admit my own feelings to myself,” she took a deep breath. “But then Tasha said something and it made me realise that there’s nothing wrong with having feelings. But then I had to admit to myself that I really fucking like you. And I just… I just got scared because you might not feel the same way, and you might just push me away,” another deep breath. “And I decided that I would push you away first… and so I did.”

“So you like me.”

“Yes,” her brows furrowed. “Was that all you got?”

“I mean… it’s the part that matters most,” you grinned at her.

“What do you mean?”

“I really fucking like you too,” you said cupping her cheeks. “I thought you knew and that was why you were avoiding me. But now I get it, I make you nervous,” you said teasingly.

“I wouldn’t use that word…” you rolled your eyes before shutting her off with your lips, finally giving in and kissing her.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for a while now,” you whispered over her lips as you deepened the kiss.

Her lips were soft and rough, and they had some saltiness to them due to her being all sweaty. But you didn’t mind at all, in fact you really like it.

“Remember last time we were here?” you whispered in her ear, trailing a path of kiss down her jaw and neck.

“You mean… that time we last trained?” she sounded breathlessly and it sent a shiver down your whole body.

“If I remember correctly, which I know I do…” you gently bit her skin earning a hiss out of her lips. “You were on the grown and I was on top of you, remember?”

“Yes…” she said as her fingers ran through your hair.

“Want to pick up where we left it off?”

Likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated! <3

-M

#yelena belova #yelena belova x reader #yelena belova x y/n #yelena belova x fem reader #yelena belova imagine #florence pugh #florence pugh x reader #littlexscarletxwitch's fic #requests by lovely anons ‘๑’

233 notes · View notes