#mentions of unhealthy habits
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Hey Q! Sorry for bothering you, but for some reason I can no longer find any of your tik tok accounts 😭 Did they get deleted or something?
Hi this is Q! I’m coming out of the woodwork to address this, since I did went radio silent out of the blue so it’s not a bother at all
The short answer is Yes, I deleted my tiktok
Yes delete not deactivate, I’m not coming back to That app or IG or Twt, I deleted my socials except here and YouTube, I honestly felt so overwhelmed with everything, I realized I’m not even posting for myself anymore there. A lots of people crossed my boundaries time and time again I felt so helpless, bitter with myself. I guess I was just overwhelmed with the attention I got; both positive and negatives ones.
Im done and I want to start over so that’s why I’m here and on YouTube, I already posted some of these on my community tab on YT but here’s what I have in mind for the future of the content I want to create: more detail under the cut, and also;
CW: very brief mention of spiraling, harm inflict oneself or others, paranoia, etc
•Long-form content: my attention span is a bit messed up from consuming and making short-form content to the point where I can’t focus in university. I want to create something meaningful. It’s not that my previous content was not meaningful, no. I had fun and no time is wasted when I have fun, it was warm… but as I mentioned earlier, I just felt this lingering bitterness the longer I stayed making those short-form content. It really felt like I was on the verge of losing it. Especially with how the bigger following I have the less people think of me as a person than just another content creator you see on the internet,
I want to create long-form content, I’m so tired of forcing myself to generate 15 second content. On tiktok it just feels like I’m just creating and not really connecting. I want to try something new, maybe create an open space for meaningful discussion in the comments. I don’t think I can stand another copy-paste tiktok comment anymore. You know what I meant if you’re frequent on that app.
•Art Content with Commentary: and don’t worry this won’t be those petty artist drama issue, but I will still cover anything serious
it could be love letters or video essays ranging from fan fictions, fandom culture, the art scene and so much more. I may even share a bit of my personal life, this will be self indulgent after all! I want to make it fun for myself and as well to those who comes across my channel. I really REALLY want to create a genuine following.
On tiktok it’s so easy to gain following but not so easy to retain them, it’s mostly because of the algorithm and the FYP feature there.
On Tiktok most content that would get featured as an artist there would be creative work has to be either; more than exceptional which is pressuring enough already to consistent posters, straight up suggestive content shown to minors (tiktok doesn’t really have a blocked keywords feature but it’s so disheartening to see these creators intentionally not using the sensitive warning since it could limit their reach significantly) oh yes we can’t forget the negativity surrounding beginner artists or “art lore”
All of this cesspool of negativity, it’s a whole can of worms but it will be one of my prominent topics that I wish to discuss in my future art commentaries. I hope you guys are looking forward to those! I might bring in a few people or so to talk about it with me
and finally;
•Streaming: I used to do a lot of streams during the weekends on the clock app and it was super fun! I want to bring that back but that would have to wait since I’m unfamiliar with some features on YouTube, and I’m aware that YT does not have a discoverable feature for stream but that’s alright, I want to start something small first.
In short; I’ll figure it out! just need some baby steps before I start streaming again.
.
I apologize for deleting everything out of the blue, if I’m gonna be honest it was partially planned because I’ve been thinking about deleting my tiktok, twitter and Instagram for a while now but how it happened? In my breakdown I realized that I don’t want anyone to see me spiral, especially now that I realized how young my audience are, I’m not sure how that happened but I guess posting fandom contents does attract the young ones somehow inevitably, even though my content is nowhere near as suggestive, but I do talk about serious topics from time to time… but I digress, its not fair for them to deal with me if they see me spiral publicly,
it is especially not fair to them to console me. When I was younger than 14, I’ve been in a position where I have to talk down someone who was older, maybe 4-5 years older than me, from harming themselves or anyone, it was traumatizing and unpleasant. I don’t wish for anyone to go through that, it’s very painful.
It’s been… hard for me to ground myself. Ive been seeing things through a kaleidoscope of emotions; I was trying to focus on everything but it’s just too overwhelming so eventually I cracked. But please don’t worry I’ve been doing better now, after some time away from my online persona, and of course spending time with my beloved girlfriend, I see things much more clearly now.
Thank you to anyone who read this and much so appreciate those who understand where I’m coming from
Also now that I think of it can my stuff be considered as lost media now? Amazing! But please don’t be sad the fun I had was genuine!
Thank you again to those who genuinely enjoyed my content on tiktok but it’s time for me to try my hand at something new, I will still be dwelling in my creative headspace just.. away from public for now,
if you’re looking forward for my future post, make sure to check out my YouTube! I still have a lot I need to cook hehe, this is one of the few!
More post soon, Bye bye! -Q
#vent#mental health#mentions of unhealthy habits#I’m not sure how to tag these but I’ll try my best!#social media#q myers#tiktok#burnt out#creative fatigue#sorry for the rant#rant#content creator#art community
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You know what? Fuck you!
*takes away ur unhealthy coping mechanisms*
"i- what the fuck- give 'em back you bitch-"
#sans#sans au#undertale au#utmv#fell sans#underfell#underfell sans#aroace fell sans#uf sans#aroace uf sans#sans underfell#queer#lgbtq+#lgbtq#lgbtqia#cw: mentioned unhealthy habits#tw: implied sh#..maybe.
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Conversations I’ve had as incorrect MHA quotes part 27:
Kaminari:
Uraraka and izuku:
I’m better now!
Kaminari and sero or Shouto and Uraraka:
Shouto:
Kaminari or Sero:
Izuku and mic:
TW: MENTIONS OF ST@BBING
Izuku was that dude:
Hatsume:
TW: UNHEALTHY EATING HABITS
Kaminari:
Kaminari:
#i am helth#n e way <3#bnha#mha#tw: stabbing mention#tw: unhealthy eating habits#incorrect mha quotes#mha incorrect quotes#bnha incorrect quotes#incorrect my hero academia quotes#midoirya izuku#incorrect bnha quotes#todoroki shouto#incorrect kaminari quotes#izuku problem child midoriya#shoto todoroki#uraraka ochako#sero hanta#kaminari denki#mei hatsume
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ive only drank a cup of coffee with cream and sugar and no food for the past 5 days. how long do you think i can last like this?
#3d blog#anafood#i wanna lose weight#skinandbones#thinsperation#thinspø#tw ed but not sheeran#tw ed sheeran#body ch3ck#tw unhealthy eating habits#eating disoder#eating disoder trigger warning#eating disordered#eatong disorder#tw eating issues#disordered eating mention
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Really in the mood for some (somewhat) soft headcanons, and this one’s been kickin around for a little:
Imagine a character who’s lost a little weight, whether it be because of godawful college eating habits, they’ve been stressed and unmotivated to eat, or just simply haven’t had access to a good meal for awhile.
Now imagine they meet up with a friend/loved one they haven’t seen in a bit and that person immediately hugs them, but upon doing so they notice right away how much smaller the hungry character feels in their arms. They’ve hugged this person so many times before, and they’re certain they shouldn’t be able to feel their spine.
The hugger lets go and immediately starts asking questions, “how have you been eating lately,” “when��s the last time you ate,” and as they do they continue to worriedly inspect their hungry loved one.
Much to their embarrassment, the hugger places a hand on the other’s tummy in the midst of their inspection, and as they do their stomach turns loose a terribly hungry growl. They finally admit they haven’t been eating as well as they would have liked, and the hugger wastes no time in beginning to put together a proper meal.
And obviously the hungry character is long overdue for some cuddles once they finish eating <3
#weight loss mention tw#unhealthy eating habits tw#sfw hunger kink#stomach growling#headcanon#tummy#hungry#just a little thang
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I have approximately 3 settings
Eat absolutely everything in the house, none of it healthy, just because me hungy and want delicious food
AAAAAAAAAA WHY DID I EAT THAT!!! WHY. DID. I. EAT. THAT. I am a disgusting foul creature that does not deserve food.
Eating nothing for a whole day to make up for it
Repeat cycle
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𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂 : 𝐅𝐄𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒.
bold what applies, italic what sometimes applies and strike what never applies.
HAPPINESS. being unable to stop smiling. laughter. bear hugs. happy tears. waving arms around. dancing. contently sighing. eyes twinkling. laugh lines. childlike playfulness. skipping. talking more. affection. cracking more jokes than usual. gesturing more when talking. higher pitched voice. squealing. jumping around. clapping.
SADNESS. tearing up. self-hugging. one-arm cross. an aching chest. scratchy throat. a runny nose. turning away. deep breaths. quivery smiles. crying. infantile sobbing. hands gripping each other or an object. covering mouth. puffy eyes. eyes appear red. running makeup. voice breaking. a distant or empty stare. monotone voice. asking for comfort. faking a smile. crumbling. shaking. whimpering. depression. abusing an unhealthy habit. withdrawing from others. big teary eyes. doing something even if it could hurt them.
ANGER. furrowed brows. baring teeth. passive-aggressive comments. avoiding eye contact. sarcasm. headache. sore muscles. hiding clenched fists. irritability. jumping to conclusions. raising voice. going silent. demanding immediate action. keeping it all in until exploding. body tensing. making risky decisions. middle finger.
FEAR. wanting to flee or hide. what-ifs. images of what-could-be flashing in mind. uncontrollable trembling. rapid breathing. screaming. a skewed sense of time. irritability. keeping silent. denying fear. turning away from the cause. pretending to be brave. nail-biting. lip-biting. scratching skin. a joking tone but a voice that cracks. fainting. insomnia. panic attacks. exhaustion. substance abuse. tics. rushing adrenaline. face draining of colour. hair lifting on the back of the neck. feeling rooted to the spot. making body as small as possible. staring but not seeing. crying. a shrill voice. whispering. gripping something or someone. stuttering. flinching at noises. pleading.
EXHAUSTION. constantly yawning. blurring words together. dark circles or lines under eyes. mood swings. hallucinations. calling people by the wrong name. dizziness. denying they’re tired. slow blinking. trouble concentrating. stumbling. leaning on a doorframe for support. sluggish movements. falling asleep someplace that isn’t a bed. becoming irritated by the smallest things. “i’m awake, i’m fine.” shaking so bad they spill their drink. fall asleep in their clothes. lay their head on the table because they’re so tired. passing out.
tagged. gotten 👌 stole it
tagging. @jellodoc / @devilagent and whoever else would like to
#OUT.#DASH.#HC.#substance abuse /#ask to tag#IDK HOW TO TAG THE MENTION OF IT#alcohol mention#implied ....... all the 'abusing an unhealthy habit' part means here is that glenn will sometimes impulsively drink
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About the shownu bread cheeks. Honestly I’m trying not to comment on people’s especially kpop idols appearance because we never know what people are going through…but seeing your man so chiselled in the face after him looking quite fuller and healthy before and during enlistment I 100% suspected it was for comeback purposes idk also I always think back of the comments about him being “too big” for the all the stage clothing and how some fans didn’t like his bigger frame as though the man isn’t a former an athlete and a dancer but…idk it’s all very sad.
Oh yeah definitely! I'd never bring this stuff up where I'd suspect the idol in question would see them! I remember a few times during vlives and monchannel before his enlistment he mentioned how mbb keep telling/asking him if he lost weight and he was frustrated with it and insisted that he hadn't. Like he clearly doesn't like these types of comments.
Its true that they all usually lose weight during cb/promotion eras but it seems quite drastic this time.... his cheeks are barely there when he smiles...
#its usually kihyun i worry abt when it comes to dieting bc he seems like he has the worst and most unhealthy diet habits#like the 1-meal-a-day diet... it infuriates me every time I think about it#but shownu always seemed to know what he was doing#like that one shownuayo episode where he was quoting the rock (i think)#-in the car while he was driving himself somewhere and he was like 'carbs are friend!' 😭😭😭#it made my heart so happy...#but Kihyun did mention the other day that while him and hyungwon and Changkyun went to eat after the music show recording-#shownu didnt go with them and instead went to gym...#i really. really hope that he's not doing this because of those ppl's comments during his enlistment when a few pics of him came out#i was so happy because he looked so healthy and happy....#but there will always be those people who don't know when to shut up and keep their bullshit opinions to themselves#at the end of the day he's a grown man and i have to trust that he's taking care of himself#its not up to me or anyone else to decide if he's healthy or making healthy decisions for his body#i can just hope that he stays healthy and happy and support him however way i can :'(#but i will miss his bread cheeks dearly 😞💔#ask#anon
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"Should I be worried about the caffeine dependency around Paldea?"
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i’m sorry but i hate abbey sharpe so much
like my god can you be any more condescending
#dietitians like her make me so scared#like imagine u go get help from a dietitian and they’re hardcore sneering at u when u mention ur unhealthy eating habits#urgh! smh!#gunk
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to all the people posting ED and thinspo content tagging it as “th!nsp0″ and “e@tingdis0rd3r” to circumvent the bans/content filtering I wish you all a very stop :) stop now :)))
#GRRRRR.#I thought we as the girlies were like collectively past romanticizing mental illness and unhealthy habits#but apparently the foundations of tumblr refuse to die#I will kill it myself if need be#I went on my explore page for one (1) minute to look at silly pictures and got slammed with 'can't wait to get down to 100 pounds!!'#what if we all collectively decided to smash our phones with hammers.#eating disorder mention
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coffee/brekkie
black coffee (5cal)
zero sugar vanilla caramel creamer, 1 1/2 tsp (45cal)
total: ~50cal
#tw food mention#tw calorie mention#tw dis0rd3red e@ting#tw diet culture perpetuation#im really not pleased about reverting back to my adolescent Unhealthiness Blog habits#but lo and behold#i lack control over my life#ATTENTION: this is NOT the place for any form of fatshaming#if you are intentionally fat-shaming in the replies or reblog tags i will publicly berate & then block u#internalized fatphobia is incredibly insidious & powerful & we gotta try our best to fight it#even (ESPECIALLY) when we're engaging in behaviors that are specifically rooted in & founded on fatphobic ideals#& to acknowledge that i'm going to tag internalized fatphobia#bc as we're processing & unlearning our own internalized fatphobia on an individual basis we have to try our best not to harm others#tw internalized fatphobia
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I'm literally so fucking drunk I can't see straight
#also i told my mom i fail two classes so tell me about unhealthy coping mechanism#tw bad habits#tw bad coping mechanisms#tw alchohol mention
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I am feeling awful, I'm feeling sick and tired and stressed as hell from classes starting up again, my disability is only getting worse, everything hurts, my stomach and throat hurts because I made the mistake of trying a banana again (I'm allergic, I get anaphylaxis) because my dumbass wanted to know if they were still poisonous to me (they are), I'm so tired but I can't sleep, I've had a pounding headache since 11 this morning, I've realized that I only drank like a can of sparkling water every day for like the last week so I forced myself to drink four cups, the first two I gulped down, the last two I struggled to keep down because I've also not been eating right and my stomach was empty, I think my ED is coming back, I've been going to bed at two and waking up at six for the past week and a half, I should probably go back to a therapist again but it's expensive as fuck, my organs are screaming at me, my dysphoria about my chest has been making me feel like shit recently, I put on a binder and I still have very visible boobs, I can't bring myself to make anything but the most vent art ish art, whether it's my writing or my drawings or my songs, everything hurts everywhere.
All of my awful memories are creeping in again and I'm forgetting things more often, I'm not going to self harm again because I'm better than that and I'm a year and a half clean but I can still see all of my scars and that's upsetting to me because people bring them up and then I either have to tell them that I was abused as a child or that it was self inflicted because both are still visible, my bad grandparents who abused me could show up anytime and I would never know beforehand.
I really just want to feel better in the morning
I'm going to go to sleep and hope that I don't throw up and choke on it in my sleep.
#tw depressing thoughts#tw ed#tw disordered eating#tw pain#tw dehydration#tw self harm#tw unhealthy coping mechanisms#tw unhealthy habits#tw throwing up#tw death mention#goddamn the tw list is huge#don't worry I'm fine I just needed to vent
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wow I really am terrified of gaining weight
#ed tw#idk what my motivation for all of this is#I've considered that I want to look sick and like. make my mental problems visible#but I'm actually very embarrassed about this and hide it. I get uncomfortable if people ever mention my eating habits#it's not really for looks bc I understand that being such an unhealthy size isn't attractive? at least when it involves unhealthy methods#makes me look like a sickly little corpse#also I lose a lot of muscle mass bc of this which is sad bc I like lifting weights. but I ruin all my work and progress#ik a common ed theme is control but I've never really related to that tbh#I also think it could just be a weird form of perfectionism since I'm just worried about numbers but idk#bc I still think I look too fat and that's not just numbers#but ig it still could be me striving for perfection overall and that includes both numbers and appearance?? but idk#what I know is that I feel accomplished for not eating. losing weight makes me really happy#gaining weight makes me upset even though ik it's just water retention and whatever. not actual weight gain#I just don't wanna see the scale number go up#I've been doing this for years and I still don't understand why. none of my psychoanalysis attempts have given a solid answer#maybe I'll understand eventually#except starving destroys your brain function. no wonder I can't figure out my reasons for this 😭😭😭#so like. I've never actually recovered but I am way funnier and cooler in my moments of partial recovery#that makes me sad too bc I don't wanna eat but I can't deny its benefits#Sera
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