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writindom · 1 year

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Rivalry.

< Jaehyun x female reader >

Never say never, because limits, like fears, are often just an illusion and so was your dislike towards him.

Part I - Espresso Martini

Hello there, this is my first time ever writing...anything, I really hope you enjoy it (if someone out there ever reads it) and may consider posting a second part as I already have it. Thank you again for taking the time to read this.

Word count: 4 k.

—

You sat at your desk, staring at the computer screen in front of you. You had been working on a new project for weeks, pouring all of your energy into making it a success. As Vice President of Starlight Entertainment, one of the most prestigious K-pop companies in the industry, you knew that your success was not only important for your career but also for the company's reputation.

As you typed away, your phone rang, interrupting you concentration. It was your assistant, informing you of a major K-pop industry event that was taking place the following week. The event would be attended by all of the top executives from K-pop companies around the world, and it was a chance for you to showcase your company's latest achievements and innovations.

You were thrilled at the opportunity to present your ideas and impress the attendees, including your CEO. You knew that this event could be a game-changer for your career and for Starlight Entertainment as a whole

—

The day of the event arrived, and you walked into the conference room with confidence. You were dressed in a sleek black suit, tailored to fit your slim and toned figure. Your long, dark brown hair was styled in loose waves that cascaded down your back, highlighting your sun-kissed skin that glowed under the fluorescent lights and drawing attention to the delicate curve of your neck. Your oval-shaped face was framed by subtle makeup that accentuated your full lips and striking dark brown eyes, which seemed to sparkle with determination and intelligence.

Your petite frame at 5 foot 2 inches was perfectly balanced, with delicate curves that hinted at femininity without being exaggerated. Your physique was symmetrically proportioned, with toned arms and legs that hinted at your dedication to fitness. You commanded attention with your presence and poise, exuded an air of confidence and elegance, without the need for the exaggerated curves that some other women in the industry were known for.

As you looked around the room, you noticed Jaehyun, the Vice President of Moonlight Entertainment, Starlight's sister company and close partner in the entertainment industry.

Jaehyun commanded attention with his tall and imposing presence, standing at 6 foot with a muscular build that hinted at his dedication to fitness. His chiseled jawline and sharp cheekbones were accentuated by a hint of stubble, and his dark and intense eyes had a piercing gaze that seemed to penetrate through anyone he looked at. His light brown hair was styled in a sleek and modern way, framing his angular face perfectly. He was dressed in a deep shade of navy blue suit complementing his pale skin tone that fit him like a glove, highlighting his broad shoulders and tapered waist. Despite his commanding presence and piercing gaze, there was a hint of approachability in his warm smile and friendly demeanor, making him a natural at building relationships in the industry. Jaehyun was equally confident, exuding a sense of self-assuredness that made it clear he was a force to be reckoned with.

You couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy as you took in his polished appearance, despite the animosity between their companies. The two of you locked eyes and exchanged curt nods, the tension between you palpable.

The event began, and each company's representatives took turns presenting their latest achievements and innovations. You were nervous but determined to make a lasting impression. As you stepped up to the podium, you took a deep breath and began your presentation.

You spoke with passion and conviction, your words flowing smoothly as you explained your company's latest project. The audience was captivated by your ideas, and received thunderous applause at the end of your speech. Jaehyun stepped up to the podium next, and you couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy at his commanding presence. He spoke with a confidence that was hard to match, his voice deep and smooth as he explained Moonlight Entertainment's latest achievements. His ideas were just as innovative as yours, but somehow he managed to make them sound even more impressive.

As the event came to a close, you were approached by Levi Ackerman, the CEO of Starlight, standing tall at 6'3" with broad shoulders and a chiseled physique. His dark hair was cropped short and styled in a slicked-back fashion, accentuating his sharp jawline and angular features. The black tailored suit he wore seemed to have been made specifically for him, emphasizing every curve and line of his muscular frame with expert precision. He offered his congratulations on a job well done. You felt a sense of relief wash over you, knowing that your hard work had paid off.

Levi is a man of few words but immense power. He is known for his strictness, attention to detail, and unwavering dedication to excellence. His piercing gray eyes seem to see through people and his unwavering posture commands respect from everyone around him. Levi has a no-nonsense attitude when it comes to business and expects nothing but the best from his employees.

He is an imposing figure. Despite his intimidating demeanor, those who work closely with him know that he can be surprisingly kind and understanding when the situation calls for it. However, crossing him or not meeting his expectations is not an option if you want to keep your job.

Meanwhile, Jaehyun was approached by his CEO, who seemed less than impressed with his performance. You watched from a distance, a small smile playing at the corners of your lips. You couldn't help but feel a sense of satisfaction at your rival's failure.

As the attendees began to filter out of the conference room, you made your way over to Jaehyun. You couldn't resist the opportunity to gloat. "Looks like my company's still one step ahead," you said, a smug smile on your face.

Jaehyun scowled. "Don't get too ahead of yourself," he retorted. "Moonlight Entertainment will always come out on top."

You rolled your eyes. "We'll see about that," you replied before walking away, feeling a sense of victory. But little did you know, their rivalry was far from over.

After the event, you felt like the winner and celebrated with your coworkers. The weekend had finally arrived, and you were looking forward to a three-day break as Monday was a national holiday in South Korea, commemorating the founding of the country. You didn't have any plans to travel or spend time with friends or family, as they were not particularly close. Instead, you looked forward to a quiet weekend at home, relaxing and recharging your batteries.

As you walked out of the office building, you took a deep breath of the cool autumn air and smiled. You felt proud of yourself for a job well done and grateful for the upcoming break. You knew that you would return to work feeling refreshed and ready to tackle any challenges that came your way.

—

You had always known that your penthouse was the best one in the apartment complex. It had a breathtaking view of the city, luxurious amenities, and a pool and jacuzzi that only the penthouse owners were allowed to use. It was on one of those holiday seasons that you decided to take a dip in the jacuzzi after a long day of work.

To your dismay, when you arrived at the pool area, you found that someone was already there, and it was none other than Jaehyun. You had seen him around the complex before, but you had never spoken. You couldn't deny that he was attractive, but his aloof and cold demeanor always put you off.

"Oh great, you're here," you muttered sarcastically. “I was hoping to have some alone time here.”

Jaehyun smirked, "I could say the same about you. What brings you here, Y/N? Need to cool off from your 'high-stress job'?"

You rolled your eyes. "Actually, I live here, just like you. And I don't need to justify my presence to you."

Jaehyun chuckled, "Okay, okay. But you're right, we are neighbors after all. Can't avoid each other forever."

You let out a sigh. "I guess not. Nonetheless, I should try to make the most of it. Would you like to share a drink?"

Jaehyun raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Are you offering me a drink? You must really be desperate for some company."

You bristled at his insinuation. "Desperate? No. I simply thought it would be nice to share a drink with someone who isn't as insufferable as you usually are. But if you're not interested, I can always find someone else."

Jaehyun chuckled. "Touché. I'll take you up on your offer. But only if you promise to be on your best behavior."

You rolled your eyes. "I make no promises."

You and Jaehyun were interrupted by a worker from the jacuzzi area. "Excuse me," the worker said, "would you like something to drink? We have water, juice, and some cocktails available."

Jaehyun turned to you. "What's your drink of choice?"

"I'm into coffee-based cocktails," you replied. "Maybe an Espresso Martini?"

Jaehyun raised an eyebrow in surprise. "I didn't take you for the martini type."

You smirked. "I have a lot of sides you don't know about. I'll have an Espresso Martini," you said.

"Very well, ma'am. And for you, sir?" he asked.

Jaehyun hesitated for a moment, looking at you. "I'll have the same," he finally said.

The waiter nodded and took note of their order. "Right away, sirs and madam."

As the waiter walked away, you looked over at Jaehyun. "I take it you've never had an Espresso Martini before?" you asked, a hint of amusement in your tone.

Jaehyun chuckled sheepishly. "No, I haven't. I usually stick to beer or whiskey."

You smiled, secretly pleased that Jaehyun had taken your suggestion. You could tell that he was the type who stuck to his usual drinks, so this was a small victory for you.

As you both relaxed in the jacuzzi, the waiter approached you with your cocktails. "Here are your drinks. Anything else you need, just let me know," he said with a smile before walking away.

You took a sip of your martini and savored the rich and bittersweet taste. "This is delicious," you said.

Jaehyun took a sip of his own martini and nodded in agreement. "I have to admit, this is pretty good," he said with a hint of surprise in his voice.

You chuckled. "See, finally not being so cheap as usual," you teased. "Who needs beer or whiskey when you can have something like this?"

Jaehyun rolled his eyes playfully. "You and your fancy coffee-based cocktails," he said with a grin. "But I have to admit, you might be onto something here. Though I suppose that's the only thing you have going for you. In the rest, you may be helpless."

You raised an eyebrow and took another sip of your martini. You weren't sure what to make of Jaehyun's backhanded compliment, but you weren't going to let it get to you. You had worked too hard to get where you were and wasn't going to let anyone belittle your accomplishments. Instead, you simply smiled and said, "Well, I'll take what I can get."

After a moment, you and Jaehyun continued to sip on your drinks in comfortable silence. The warm water of the jacuzzi and the cool night breeze were the perfect combination for relaxation. You both closed your eyes and let out a contented sigh, enjoying the moment of peace and quiet.

You felt a sense of calm wash over you, and for the first time in a long while, you were able to let go of all your worries and stress.

The two of you continued to sip your drinks in comfortable silence for a moment before Jaehyun spoke up again. "Well, I can tell you're a hard worker," he said, studying you from across the water. "And surprisingly, not as stuck up as I thought you were."

You raise an eyebrow and set down your glass on the edge of the tub. "Excuse me?" you say, crossing your arms over your chest.

Jaehyun chuckles. "Come on, you have to admit you give off a bit of an ice queen vibe."

You smirk and shake your head. "I suppose I can see why you might think that," you say. "But I'm not really like that."

Jaehyun smiles and holds up his hands in mock surrender. "Okay, okay. Fair enough," he says. "But you have to admit, you do have a certain air of... elegance about you."

You chuckle and pick up your glass again. "I'll take that as a compliment," you say. "And you, Mr. Jeong, give off a bit of a player vibe."

Jaehyun's smile grows wider. "Guilty as charged," he says, winking at you. "But you know what they say, it takes one to know one."

You roll your eyes, but you can't help but laugh. "You're impossible," you say.

Jaehyun just grins and takes another sip of his martini. The two of you settle back into a comfortable silence, enjoying the warmth of the water and the soft glow of the moon overhead.

As the night goes on, you both continue to sip on your drinks and engage in conversation. The dim lighting of the pool and jacuzzi area creates a cozy and intimate atmosphere, and before you know it, several hours have passed. Eventually, Jaehyun gets out of the jacuzzi and reaches for something near his towel. He returns with a pack of cigars and a lighter, surprising you. You look at him hesitantly, but he simply shrugs and lights one up, offering you one as well. You both take a drag and exhale the smoke into the cool night air, feeling a sense of relaxation wash over you. For a moment, you simply sit in comfortable silence, enjoying the quiet moments of the night.

You raise an eyebrow as you look over at Jaehyun. "Well, I'll give you credit for being polite for once," you say, sipping your coffee cocktail.

Jaehyun chuckles. "I can be polite when I want to be," he replies, taking a drag of his cigarette.

You doubt that. "You're usually too busy trying to one-up me in everything," you shoot back.

"I'm just doing my job," Jaehyun says defensively.

"Your job is to be a pain in my ass?" you ask, rolling your eyes.

Jaehyun shrugs. "My job is to make sure my company is successful, just like you."

You scoff. "And yet you always seem to have a personal vendetta against me."

Jaehyun grins wryly. "Maybe I just like to see you squirm."

You glare at him. "You're impossible."

Jaehyun laughs. "You're not so easy to work with yourself, you know."

You raise an eyebrow. "Is that supposed to be a compliment?"

Jaehyun shrugs. "Take it however you want."

There is a moment of silence as you both sip your drinks, studying each other.

"You know, we don't have to hate each other," Jaehyun says suddenly.

You raise an eyebrow. "Oh really? And why is that?"

"Because outside of work, I don't think I actually hate you," Jaehyun says with a small smile.

You frown in confusion. "What does that even mean?"

Jaehyun sighs. "Look, I know we've had our differences in the past, but I think we could actually get along if we tried. Plus, it's the holidays, we should try to be civil, at least for tonight."

You study him for a moment before nodding slowly. "Okay, I'll give you that."

As you finish your cigars and the night grows even later, Jaehyun looks at you and says, "You know, it's getting pretty late and we're both off the clock. Why don't you come back to my place? I've got a bottle of scotch that's been calling my name all night." You hesitate for a moment, but ultimately agree, feeling a sense of excitement at the prospect of spending more time with Jaehyun outside of work. You both get dressed and head out, making your way to Jaehyun's penthouse as the city sleeps around you.

—

As you watched Jaehyun expertly prepare your favorite scotch cocktail, you couldn't help but admire the way he moved around his kitchen with ease. Pouring and mixing the ingredients with practiced hands, he created a drink that you couldn't resist savoring every sip of.

"You're quite the mixologist," you said with a smile. "I had no idea you were such a master of the bar."

Jaehyun chuckled. "I've picked up a few tricks over the years," he said. "Spending as much time in bars as I do, you tend to learn a thing or two."

You were impressed by his skill. "Well, it certainly shows. This is delicious."

Jaehyun took a sip of his own cocktail, savoring the taste. "Really? What can I say, I have refined tastes."

You chuckled. "Ha! You wish. You're just trying to impress me with your fancy drinks."

"Maybe I am," Jaehyun admitted, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Or maybe I just want to get you drunk and take advantage of you."

You raised an eyebrow. "Wow, that's really charming. Is that how you usually win people over?"

"No," Jaehyun replied with a grin. "I usually just rely on my good looks and irresistible charm."

Rolling your eyes, you said, "Oh, please. Don't tell me you're one of those guys who thinks he can get anything he wants just by being good-looking."

Jaehyun shook his head. "No, of course not. I also have a great personality."

"Hmm," you said, pretending to consider. "That's debatable."

As the night wore on, you found yourself sitting in the living room of Jaehyun's penthouse, sipping your drinks and enjoying the conversation. It was strange to be there with him, considering your fierce rivalry at work.

"I never thought I'd be sitting here in your penthouse, having a drink with you. We've always been such fierce rivals," you said.

Jaehyun nodded. "Yeah, I know what you mean. I never thought I'd be here with you either. But you have to admit, there's always been some kind of tension between us."

You laughed. "That's an understatement. But seriously, I'm surprised we're getting along so well."

Jaehyun leaned back in his chair. "Why's that?"

"Well, we've always been professional rivals, and we don't exactly see eye to eye on everything. But here we are, having a civil conversation," you said.

Jaehyun nodded in agreement. "It's like we're two different people at work and outside of it. Maybe it's because we don't have to be in competition with each other all the time here."

"Maybe. Or maybe it's because we're both a little... tense. I know I am, with all the pressure at work," you said, taking a sip of your drink.

Jaehyun raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, I feel it too. Maybe if you relaxed a bit more, you'd be able to focus better."

You looked at him, surprised. "What do you mean?"

Jaehyun chuckled. "I mean... maybe if you got laid more often, you wouldn't be so wound up all the time."

Your eyes widened in shock. "Excuse me?"

Jaehyun held up his hands in mock surrender. "I'm just teasing you. But on a serious note, I think it's good that we can have conversations like this, even if we don't always agree on everything."

You nod, still a bit flustered. "Yeah, you're right. It's nice to have someone to talk to who understands the pressures of this industry."

As you both continue to talk, the hours seem to slip away, and before you know it, it's well past midnight. You've both had a bit too much to drink, enough to feel the effects but not enough to be completely drunk. Jaehyun finds himself staring at you, and he can't help but give you a compliment.

"You know, Y/N, I have to admit, I'm a little jealous of how great you are at what you do," he says.

You chuckle. "I know, I know. I'll always be the one you're living in the shadow of," you say teasingly.

Jaehyun playfully rolls his eyes. "Hey, don't give yourself too much credit," he says, throwing a bit of playful shade your way.

You just laugh and shake your head. "Oh, Jaehyun," you say, before trailing off.

Jaehyun finds himself getting lost in your smile, and before he knows it, he leans in to kiss you. You initially freeze in surprise. But as your lips meet, you feel a jolt of electricity shoot through your body. Jaehyun's lips are soft yet firm, and his kiss is filled with a raw passion that you've never experienced before. You're lost in the moment, the heat between you intensifying with each passing second. The taste of scotch lingers on your tongues as you kiss passionately. For a moment, you forget about everything else—their rivalry, your work, your responsibilities. All that matters is the here and now, the two of you together, caught up in the heat of the moment.

As you continued to kiss, Jaehyun lifted you off your seat and put you on top of him on the couch. Your passion grew even more intense as you straddled him, your hands roaming over his chest and shoulders. Jaehyun's hands slipped beneath your blouse, his touch igniting a fire within you that you couldn't control. You moaned into his mouth, unable to resist him any longer.

Your hands roamed up and down Jaehyun's back, pulling him closer to you. Jaehyun's hands found their way to your waist, pulling your body tightly against his. Then, your hands worked their way to Jaehyun's shirt, fumbling with the buttons as you tried to remove it. Jaehyun pulled back, his eyes dark with desire as he helped you with the buttons. Soon, you were both topless, your bare skin pressed together as you explored each other with abandon.

Your bodies pressed together, the heat between you becoming almost unbearable. Your fingers tangled in Jaehyun's hair, pulling him closer as you lost yourself in the moment. You moved together in a dance of desire, your bodies pressed together, the heat between you almost unbearable.

For a moment, you forgot about everything else—the worries, the fears, the inhibitions. All that mattered was the here and now, the two of you together, caught up in the throes of passion.

As you lay on the couch, lost in passion, Jaehyun realizes that he can't hold back any longer. He needs you, and he needs you now. Without breaking your kiss, he stands up, lifting you effortlessly in his arms, and carries you to his bedroom.

Once inside, he gently places you on the bed, his eyes searching yours for any sign that you want him to stop. But all he sees is desire, burning hot and bright in your gaze. He can't hold back any longer.

Your clothes are quickly discarded, the sound of buttons popping and fabric rustling filling the room. As you come together, your bodies move as one, lost in a sea of sensation and pleasure.

Your moans fill the room, the sound driving Jaehyun to new heights of passion. He can't get enough of you, can't stop touching you, tasting you, feeling you against him.

As you both lay entwined, your bodies slick with sweat, Jaehyun knows that he has never felt this way before. He looks at your face, searching for any sign that he has gone too far, but all he sees is raw desire and lust burning in your eyes. You want him as much as he wants you, and nothing will ever change that.

With a final thrust, you both reach the pinnacle of pleasure, your bodies shuddering with ecstasy. As you both lay there, spent and sated, Jaehyun knows that he has found a powerful attraction to you, something that he can't ignore or resist. With his arms wrapped around you, holding you close, you both drift off to sleep, your bodies still humming with the memory of your passionate night together. Jaehyun knows that he has found a powerful attraction to you, something that he can't ignore or resist.

—

You stirred and slowly opened your eyes, feeling the warmth of Jaehyun's body next to yours. As you tried to adjust to the dimly lit room, you realized with a jolt that it wasn't a dream. It had actually happened. Your heart raced as you sat up, trying to process the events of the night before.

"I can't believe this crap," you muttered to yourself, your mind racing with thoughts of how this could have happened. You knew you had had too much to drink, and the combination of that and the intense chemistry between you had led to a night of reckless abandon.

As you looked at the clock on your phone, you saw that it was only 4am. Your alarm would go off soon, and you needed to get home and start your day. You slowly slipped out of bed, trying not to disturb Jaehyun as you gathered your clothes and quickly got dressed.

As you made your way to the door, you couldn't help but feel a sense of shame and regret. This wasn't like you. You had always been so focused on your work, and you prided yourself on being a responsible and level-headed professional. But last night had been different.

As you stepped out of Jaehyun's penthouse and into the hallway, you realized with a sinking feeling that you were neighbors. You both lived in the same building, just different penthouses. The thought of seeing him again, of facing the awkwardness and tension between you, made your stomach churn.

But you knew you had to push those feelings aside and focus on work. You were a professional, and you would not let a moment of weakness ruin your career or your reputation. You headed to your own penthouse, determined to start your day as if nothing had happened.

#OMG #Here it goes #My first fanfic ever #NCT #nct jaehyun #jaehyun #nct 127 #nct x reader #nct 127 x reader #jaehyun images #jaehyun x reader #nct 127 jaehyun #nct fanfic #jaehyun fanfic #jaehyun fics #nct smut #jaehyun smut

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2-cute-4-school · 3 years

Text

𝓠𝓾𝓲𝓭𝓭𝓲𝓽𝓬𝓱 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓒𝓱𝓸𝓬𝓸𝓵𝓪𝓽𝓮

Group : NCT

Pairing : Griffyndor! Mark Lee x gn! Reader

Genre : hp au, rivals to lovers, light angst to absolute fluff

Word count : 4.4K words | M.list

Warnings : injury, swearing

Summary : ‘He had nightmares of you slipping right past his fingers and him failing to catch you. He relives that moment.’

a/n: thank you for 1000 followers you absolute cuties!! sending lots of smooches and snuggles your way!!

“Aren’t you going to ask how the coolest champion is feeling about tomorrow’s match?”

You watched Donghyuck, your fellow housemate and best friend since you first stepped onto the Hogwarts train, expectantly. He spared you a quick glance as he plopped down beside you on the couch in your shared common room, too busy to munch on his chocolate frog to give you any further attention.

“I’ve already asked Mark.”

You would like to be able to say you were surprised at his answer, but his teasing character has become an usual by now

It still baffled you how you managed to even tolerate each other, much less get to share a bond as deep as the one you developed along the years. You two had next to nothing in common other than your cunning wit. While Donghyuck delved deep into his love for astronomy, which you despised with a burning fervor, you dedicated your time to Quidditch entirely.

You loved the sport dearly, it offered you that adrenaline rush you were born to chase, that quickened heartbeat as you rushed to catch the Golden Snitch. You spent every spare moment you could find in your hectic schedule on the pitch with the wind threading through strands of your hair and your hands clenched so tightly onto your broomstick your knuckles turn white. And you adored every second of that. But what you definitely didn’t adore was Mark Lee.

“And worst best friend award goes to surprise surprise Lee Donghyuck!”

He shrugged unimpressed by your weak attack and focuses back on his damned frog.

Mark Lee. Unfortunately for your sanity, you had to see him almost as often as you decided to practice on your own. If there was one thing you shared with him and you respected him for was his own commitment to Quidditch. More often that not, you’d have to share the pitch with him in your spare time, taunting each other for the entire period of time you spent practicing. He was the beloved Seeker of Gryffindor, their pride and joy and your rival ever since you were both accepted in your respective teams.

“So what’s your score against him?”

“It’s a draw.”

Yes, you were that petty. You and Mark kept the score on how many times you defeated each other in matches. It didn’t actually matter which team actually won, the only thing that mattered for your childish competition was who managed to catch the Golden Snitch.

“That’s why you’re so tense?”

“Bingo, smartpants.”

“What even is the big deal about your little game? It’s not like either of you actually gets something out of this.”

“I gain the right to stick my win in his face and vice versa.”

Teasing between you and Mark often stretched your patience to its maximum and ended up in one of you snapping like a chord under pressure. Donghyuck shivered as he remembered the final match of your fourth year when your house lost against Gryffindor due to Mark catching the Snitch before you. He could vividly remember the blood rushing through his veins in fear at the sight of you battling Mark shoulder to shoulder at a dangerous speed, arm stretched out so far he believed you’d topple over at any moment.

He doesn’t want a repeat of the miserable image of you he saw at the time, a defeated you, slumped on the bench in your changing room, head lowered in ultimate shame and disappointment as bitter tears rolled off your face, splashing against the floor as Donghyuck watched worriedly through the half opened door. Mark had really done a number on you that day.

“You have to win, Y/N.”

“Why the sudden change of heart, wasn’t our competition meaningless for your highness?”

“I don’t give a frog’s toe about your competition, but I want to spend time time with you this summer. And not just to watch you practice until you drop.”

You scoffed. You knew that he was referring to the summer after your horrifying defeat against Mark. Donghyuck could barely get a hold of you since you spent all day on your broom, tiring yourself out to your limit.

“Don’t worry, I don’t plan on losing.”

“Already wetting your pants, Y/L/N?”

You didn’t have to turn around to put a face to the taunting voice behind you.

“I don’t know, Lee, should I? You must know since you have more experience than me.”

Mark’s face scrunched up at the reminder of his first year when he lost control of his broom and he quite literally saw his life flash before his eyes. Not very Gryffindor from his part.

“Whatever, we both know how this is about to end. Save your cheap defense until after this final. My team will win this year’s tournament and I’ll beat you individually too.”

The reminder of the stakes of this match weren’t soothing your nerves at all, especially mere hours before you were facing Mark on the pitch. You curled your fists and kept a straight face, not daring to show him any weakness from your side.

“Shove that pointless confidence up your ass until you prove you’re worthy of it, Lee.”

“Oh so fourth year isn’t enough proof?”

The corner of your lips twitched and your eyes narrowed. zeroing on his tense featured in a chilling glare.

“You said matches don’t count, didn’t you? You were the one insisting that you didn’t consider anything a victory other than catching the Snitch before me. And in that aspect, last I verified, we’re equals.”

His lips moved soundlessly, trying to come up with a retort, but you didn’t spare him enough time to come up with anything, turning on your heels and marching away to meet Donghyuck.

“You’ll see, Y/L/N, you’ll never be my equal.”

His voice followed you tauntingly through the busy corridors, your rushed footsteps taking you anywhere but close to the only person who could make your blood boil.

It took three pep talks and four ‘friendly’ attacks of your personal space from Donghyuck to make you gather your spirits and stop the tremors shaking up your entire body. He walked you to the changing room’s door, patting you roughly on the back one last time

“Give your best, I’ll be watching from the stands. I trust that you won’t let me get bored. Also, remember that if you lose you’re sleeping on the mat in front of the entrance in our common room.”

And with that he skipped away, hurried to find a good spot in the stands that were already starting to fill up with students. You sigh, used to his weird way of encouraging you and stepped inside the room, greeting Jungwoo, your captain and your fellow teammates, starting to change into your Quidditch uniform.

As soon as you set foot on the familiar pitch, your eyes met Mark’s who stood straight and proud side by side with his own captain sporting his Gryffindor red cape and holding his broom, the newest Nimbus model.

You Keeper was talking your ear off about the ‘amazingly efficient’ polish he found, but you couldn’t seem to rip your gaze away from Mark who in turn seemed to burn through you with his gaze. He threw you a smirk as if provoking you to lose your cool. But you decided you wouldn’t allow him the satisfaction.

The stands were already roaring to life. Any match between you and Mark was very sought after by everyone in your school due to the intensity it held each time. Despite the already loudness surrounding the pitch, one high pitched screech couldn’t help but catch your attention.

“KICK SOME ASS, Y/N! Or the mat is waiting for you!”

Count on Donghyuck to be the embarrassing mom rooting for you at her child’s every sport event. You shoot him a warning look to which he only responded with an over dramatic wink and an even louder ’whoop’. You could only sigh, appreciating his support despite your lack of reaction to it.

“I’ll kick your ass, Lee Donghyuck.”

You muttered, trying to stop the smile forming on your lips. A snort came from the side, making your head snap in its direction.

“Try your best, Y/LN, too bad you’ll still disappoint lover boy over there.”

“Jealous, Lee?”

“You wish.”

Madam Hooch interrupted your banter with a shrill whistle, stepping in between the two teams while holding the Quaffle.

“Alright, boys and girls, mount your brooms.”

Within seconds all players were high in the air, adrenaline pumping through your veins, your heated gaze locked with Mark’s. It became kind of a tradition between the two of you, intense stare downs before the official start of the game. Madam Hooch’s voice which carried the same words every time sounded far away as she bent down, ready to throw the Quaffle.

“Alright, I want a clean and fair game, hear me? Good luck and may the best win.”

The long deafening whistle signified the start of the match and Chasers whizzed past you, speeding towards the Quaffle. You and Mark broke eye contact, each of you getting immersed in the game, your sole focus being on catching sight of the Golden Snitch.

The weather worsened as the game progressed, the unpredictable May weather acting up. The clouds darkened, completely shutting out any ray of sunshine trying to sneak past them, a thickening fog suffocating the school grounds. Slowly but surely, what started as a few scattered rain drops soon turned into a full blown storm, a cold shower falling atop of you, the harsh wind whipping your capes back and forth. The stands were barely visible, the cheers from below inaudible over the wind and the players’ yells.

If it wasn’t hard enough already to spot the small, golden ball, now it seemed close to impossible. You could make out Mark’s silhouette flying around, but you didn’t linger any longer on him, focused on catching sight of the Snitch. Bludgers were flying everywhere, the Beaters’ efficiency decreasing because of the lack of visibility, another worry to add to the list.

Gryffindor was in the lead with 20 points, the score remaining tight as the match dragged on and on. You had already been playing for a while, your uniforms were already soaked and your skin paling from the biting cold of the unforgiving rain, but the conditions only spurred you further. You had to catch the Snitch.

Just as your patience was running thin, you caught sight of a fast-moving golden spot, hovering on the sidelines. Without a second thought, you sped towards it, your surroundings blurring as your eyes focused solely on the already moving Snitch. Mark noticed your forceful actions immediately, whizzing past the others players and nearing you.

“And Y/L/N seems to have finally spotted the Golden Snitch! Both Seekers are bolting after it, I can barely keep track of them!”

The crowd exploded, cheering louder than ever, but you couldn’t hear anything, pushing yourself to the limit as Mark caught up to you and you battled side by side once again. The Snitch seemed to be angrier than ever, jerking furiously at every corner, but you didn’t let yourself be caught by surprise, keeping up with it.

Until it started speeding in a straight line, stopping its irregular twists and turns and you knew that was your chance. You flew at top speed, stretching your hand in front of you so much that your muscles almost protested and Mark followed suit. You were shoulder to shoulder with him, subtly knocking into each other in an attempt to make the other lose their balance.

“Move! It’s mine!”

His hoarse voice yelled right by your year, only making you grit your teeth harder.

“Fuck off, Lee!”

Your fingertips were a breath away from the Snitch, Mark’s arm pressing into yours, the cold wind biting at your cheeks. Desperately, you shifted your weight from your bottom to the hand clutching your broomstick, leaning forward on your arm and before Mark could react, you lurched forward slightly, encasing the running object in the palm of your hand, clutching it so tightly it left marks into the skin, but you didn’t care.

You did it. You caught the Golden Snitch.

“Y/N!”

Before you could regain your stance, a Bludger knocked into your broom forcefully. With your already unsteady grip on the broomstick, you toppled over in an instant, the broom slipping from under you, but you didn’t dare unclench the fingers trapping the Snitch in your hand.

Mark’s desperate yell seemed to be the only sound echoing in your ears as you plummeted. The last thing you saw before you knocked loudly into the ground with a sickening crack were Mark’s distressed features, a hand stretched to its full extent in front of him as he rushed to get a hold of you, your own outstretched fingers slipping right past his.

Surprisingly, as soon as you managed to crack your eyes open you weren’t hit with a blinding light. It still seemed to take a great effort to keep them open for longer than a second, your hand twitching in an attempt to bring it to cover your sensitive eyes, but being stopped by a weight forcing it down.

“Y/N?”

You groaned, scrunching up your face as soreness hit your body full force at your attempt to move.

“Merlin, Y/N, can you open your eyes?”

You could recognize Donghyuck’s voice anywhere, but the almost desperate tone he used was quite foreign to you.

“Come on, babe, open your eyes. Madam Pomfrey! ”

You realized the weight on your hand were actually his fingers which now squeezed yours encouragingly as his other hand came up to smooth strands of your hair away from your face. You clenched your teeth, forcing an eye open.

“Stop fucking yelling, punk.”

At your annoyed retort, he let out a relieved sigh, wrapping his arms gently around you while trying not to jostle you too much.

“Thank Merlin, you’re back.”

After Madam Pomfrey checked on you and updated you on your injuries which were a bit more serious than you expected, she left you with Donghyuck once again. He leaned back in his chair, a lot more relaxed than in the past days he’s had to spend by your bedside. You furrowed your eyebrows.

“The match. We won the match right?”

Donghyuck snorted as your first question was about Quidditch instead of your own health, but it didn’t even surprise him anymore.

“Yes, you crazy hag, you won.”

“Yes! We did it! We won!”

You’ve never felt more relieved in your entire life. You finally proved to yourself that all the time and work you’ve put into Quidditch wasn’t for nothing. And if this was the elevation you’d feel after winning cups, you were ready to spend the rest of your youth chasing the Snitch.

“You should eat some chocolate, gain your energy back.”

Now that he mentioned it, you finally focused on your nightstand that overflowed with sweets. You grabbed the closest one, a chocolate frog, not hesitating to stuff it all in your mouth and collect the card inside. Another Nicolas Flamel, you already had two of those.

“Those are a lot.”

“Tell me about it. Don’t worry, I’ll help you finish them.”

“I don’t doubt that.”

“Hyuck, tell me, did Jungwoo cry?”

“Should’ve seen him, like a baby. I’m pretty sure he filled half of that cup with snot-”

“Ewww, I didn’t need all the gross details. Ah, I’m sorry for missing that. And Lee’s face, I bet I’d sleep like a baby for the next 10 years if I had the chance to see that.“

Donghyuck’s lips were suddenly pulled into a smirk, eyes glinting with a dangerous mischief.

“You should see one of your beaters, damn nice nose Mark delivered.”

Your munching slowed down, gulping down the sweetness loudly.

“What do you mean? Did that petty git start a fight?”

“Wouldn’t say it was out of pettiness actually.”

Mark was the first to land beside your crumpled figure, dismounting his broom faster than ever and crouching hurriedly before you. His hand ghosted over your cold cheek, too scared to touch you in case he did more harm than good. His shaking pupils fixated on you, running a hundred miles per hour over your face, hoping, praying that you’d open your eyes and celebrate in his face.

“Hey, wake up, don’t play games on the pitch, you already won! Y/L/N!”

Mark knew deep inside that you had no games left to play after a fall like that, but it was his first time seeing you so small, so hurt, so defeated despite the shining Golden Snitch still clutched loosely in your limp hand. It scared him.

“Bloody hell, wake up! Madam Hooch! Help! Anyone, help!”

His head snapped around trying to catch sight of anyone coming to your aid, eyes scanning through the fog crazily. The rain seemed to fall faster and faster, the chill settling deep into your bones. Exhausted, Mark lowered his head in defeat, his forehead gently leaning on yours, his nose nudging against yours. One of his hands still touched your cheek, lightly caressing it, thumb running over the apple of your cheek as his other hand curled into a fist against the ground.

Jungwoo landed next, almost tripping over his broom as he rushed over to you and knelt next to you, opting to ignore the position Mark was in and focus on your well being. Mark’s head didn’t even turn as he spoke lowly.

“Do something for Merlin’s sake. Get Madam Hooch, or Pomfrey! Anyone dammit, just to something!”

Mark raised himself at the lack of response from Jungwoo who seemed rotten to his spot, freezing at the sight of you.

“Are you deaf?! Fucking help!”

That seemed to snap Jungwoo out of his frozen state as he jumped to his feet, sprinting towards the stand where teachers usually stayed during matches. One by one, your teams landed and gathered near you as Mark’s yells of help guided them to you.

“Merlin, that doesn’t look good.”

Mark’s burning gaze settled on your beater who stood a few meters away, leaning on his broom.

“It would have looked better if you did your part right.”

The beater rolled his eyes at Mark’s harsh remark.

“Relax, man, I just wasn’t playing attention for a moment.”

“And you think that’s a proper excuse?!”

Mark was fired up by now, lifting himself to his feet as one of your Chasers, a year younger than you crouched by your side, gripping your hand. He sauntered over, coming face to face with the beater who didn’t seem that interested.

“I’m just saying it’s not my fault their own incompetence landed themselves in the hospital wing, I’m not pulling anyone’s wight al-”

He didn’t get to finish his mocking words as Mark’s fist met his nose with a loud crunch, Mark’s powerful swing sending him to the ground as blood started dripping from his nose steadily.

“Don’t you ever talk about Y/N like that. Not ever again. If I hear one bad word about them coming out of your worthless mouth, I’ll hex you into next year. You’ll never be half of the player Y/N already is, remember your place, asshole.”

Madam Hooch was already tending to you by the time Mark turned back to you, deeming it safe enough for you to be moved to the hospital wing. Donghyuck, who sprinted out of the stand as soon as he heard your name coming out of Jungwoo’s mouth, held your head in his lap, smoothed down your hair, pushing away wet strands that covered your eyes.

Mark strode over to you, taking off his cap and laying it over your body as he slotted an arm under your legs, his other coming around your back. He lifted your body, cradling you against his chest as Donghyuck also stood up to fix your position in Mark’s arms into a more comfortable one.

“Off to the hospital wing,now. Quick, quick, quick!”

Mark didn’t waste another moment before he hurried inside the castle with you in his hold and Donghyuck quick on his heels.

“Mark Lee stood up for me? The same Mark Lee who hates my guts since we first got in our Quidditch teams?”

“Do you know another Mark Lee? Maybe he didn’t hate you that much after all, or…not at all. After all, all these chocolate frogs are from him, said something about seeing you exchange some cards with his Griffyndor friend in class or something.”

“He visited?”

“We wouldn’t be able to get rid of him sometimes. He opened up to me once when we met outside the door trying to sneak in one night.”

“Why were you even sneaking in?”

“I was bored, okay? I had no one to tire me out during the day.”

“Hey!”

“Anyway, he said he had nightmares of you slipping right past his fingers and him failing to catch you. He relives that moment.”

“Did it really affect him that much? Accidents happen all the time.”

“Not to you, Y/N.”

“Maybe, but I’m just another player from the opposite team., right? …Do you think he…?”

Donghyuck brought a hand up to his head, massaging his temples as he sighed with annoyance.

“You’re too dense.”

“How could I have known? ”

“Look, just talk to him as soon as you can. That boy needs to finally sleep properly, even my grandma’s bag has a lighter color than his eye bags.”

You just nodded, a bit skeptic.

You were discharged on that same day. Jungwoo almost cried again when you met in the common room, hugging you tightly, praising and scolding you at the same time with a brotherly smile.

You first saw Mark Lee in the halfway, after your Potions class. He was sitting on the ledge of a large window, staring seemingly into space. Donghyuck’s words echo in your mind as you decide to approach him and hop onto the space beside him, settling comfortable against the window behind you.

“Woah, Lee, Donghyuck was right, you could really use some concealer.”

Mark jostled as if he only noticed you now. His wide doe eyes racked over your smiling face and he seemed to panic internally.

“Whe-When did you get here? Why are you out of bed?”

“Because I was discharged?”

“What? Since when?”

“Earlier today.”

“Oh…”

He cleared his throat awkwardly, eyes running wild everywhere but in your direction. You chuckled.

“It’s okay, I already know how much the almighty Mark Lee worried over poor little me.”

Mark scoffed, his embarrassed behavior vanishing.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself. I see that hit to your head didn’t help with your sharp tongue, disappointingly.”

He swiftly moved away, starting to walk away from you until your hand clasped around his wrist, stopping him mid step.

“Wait, I just… I wanted to thank you.”

Mark seemed confused now, turning back to you with furrowed eyebrows.

“Thank me? What for?”

“Standing up for me and uh, you know, taking care of me.”

Mark’s face darkened at the memory of your beater.

“That git was just asking for it and I barely did anything.”

“Then at least let me repay you for the chocolate frogs you brought me.”

Now he seemed to choke on a confused ‘huh?’ with a bewildered expression that just melted your otherwise cocky demeanor.

“W-what? How-”

Mark’s words died in his throat as you slotted your lips against his in a teasing kiss, your hand holding the nape of his next affectionately and pulling him closer you. Mark took a few moments to realize it was actually happening in reality, not just an illusion from the lack of sleep. His hands came up to your waist, wrapping you in his embrace and pulling you against him impossibly closer. Years of pushed down passion and longing were exchanged in that moment, dizzying both of you.

As you pulled away from each other for air, Mark could taste the faint sweetness of chocolate on his lips. He smiled and his whole rival image turned into a lovesick teenage boy with a smile brighter than the sun. He laughed quietly, thumbs caressing your sides gently.

“I see you enjoyed your chocolate.”

You leaned more into him, pulling his face so close to yours that your noses brushed against each other’s, your ravished breath fanning across his lips as you whispered.

“I did. I’m glad I’m so interesting to you that you observe me in class enough to know that I collect chocolate frogs cards.”

You expected a blush to paint his cheeks red, an elbow in your side or at least an annoyed huff but you got none of that. Instead, one of Mark’s hands came up to cradle your cheek as he stared deep into your eyes with an unreadable look.

“Excuse me but it’s hard not to look when I have the prettiest person I’ve ever seen who also happens to be my crush since 3rd year.”

Your eyes widened, searching his for any hint that he may be just lying or teasing you. But all you could find was pure, unadulterated fondness, a withheld fire burning low in his eyes. He leaned down, lips brushing against the shell of your ear and sending goosebumps across the expanse of your skin.

“It’s been so hard not to just pull you aside and snog you senseless, especially in your Quidditch uniform.”

You decided to play along. You brought your fingers to his heated neck, running them faintly over his skin and you smirked seeing him shiver at your touch.

“Having a kink for uniforms, Lee?”

Mark screeched lowly, pulling away from you as if burned. He smoothed down his robes, fixating you with a glare that made you laugh.

“Y/N, I’m serious, though. I like you, I really really lo-….like you.”

You noticed his stutter, but it only made your smile widen as you stretched out a hand to intertwine his fingers with yours and pull him along down the corridor.

“Hm, I’ll need some more proof of that.”

Mark squeezed your hand in response, chuckling at you sweetly. He leaned over, pressing a feather like kiss to your temple.

“Don’t worry, you’re nowhere done with your payment back to me. And I only accept it in the form of kisses and cuddles.”

You smiled at each other, your hearts finally settling satisfied in your chests after years of internal turmoil that finally burned out.

“That can be arranged easily.”

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dorky-thighchi · 4 years

Text

WHAT I LOVE ABOUT DAISUGA AND CANON MOMENTS

Let’s appreciate these two for leading the team to the nationals (long post ahead)

1. Their goals and hard work for the team:

They’re always shown together planning for the team. When Asahi stopped playing volleyball, Noya got suspended, former coach Ukai stopped coaching. I felt bad for these two, they went through hard times as their captain and vice captain it’s their obligation to unite and guide the team. During their first year and second year they were used to failure and called flightless crows. Their expectations crumpled but they did not give up. It’s Daichi and Suga’s job to bring back the name of Karasuno to the nationals with the help of coach Ukai and Takeda, finally they made it to nationals, that’s why their former captain was so proud of them because they followed his words. When they didn't have their coach yet, they behaved as Karasuno’s temporary coaches (thank goodness Takeda’s an angel). Daichi was shown coaching the team in the first few episodes and Suga helped Tanaka bond Kageyama and Hinata. Suga questioned Daichi’s plan about the weird duo (Daichi’s a matchmaker) but after what Daichi said he helped the two bond and honed their skills.

In the HQ light novel “Melancholy of the third year student”, Asahi stated “with Sawamura leading the team and Sugawara taking care of the members, what could i possibly do to contribute” he witnessed Daichi and Suga walking together in the hallway; Asahi was impressed because of their dedication to guide the team to the nationals despite they’re in college prep class still they gave their best in guiding the team. Tanaka also acknowledged his senpais hard work that’s why he extremely respects his senpais, he was always there supporting the two. Coach Ukai madly respects Suga because he gave his setter position to Kageyama for the sake of the team and Daichi because he’s the best in motivating the team.

2. They know each other so well:

Daichi has this proud mode when he talks about Suga. When he told the team that Suga’s an experienced setter he had this “Yes that’s my amazing setter” face and when Suga did that amazing spike he jumped like a kid. In the HQ light novel “Sugawara’s decision” this happened during the first training camp. Suga was anxious to tell Daichi of his plan to give his setter position to Kageyama. When Suga finally told Ukai about his decision, Daichi and Asahi overheard their conversation and promised to win any match as much as they can. When Suga stated “I think in order to win, the person we need right now is Kageyama” Daichi and Asahi expressed their concern because the three promised to step on the court together (i get so emotional when the 3rd yrs play together). Daichi was worried and he told Suga that they can do something about it. THIS IS ACTUALLY ONE OF MY FAVORITE HQ LNs because of what Suga thought after their discussion “He was glad to have sawamura who accepted him the way he is, as his teammate” AND I FUCKIN LOST IT HQ LN SHOULD BE ANIMATED. Daichi supported Suga’s decision for the team, “Daichi was very certain of Suga who had been with him for the past 3 years”, he even stopped Tanaka from interrupting Suga’s monologue telling him to listen.

Remember when Ukai announced the first lineup for dateko vs karasuno match and the shot was focused to Suga and back to Daichi; you can see Daichi did this weird eye thing glancing at Suga. Daichi’s proud moments of Suga were “I think you’ve revived too Suga” and “I’m glad you still want to fight” when he told Daichi “I do wish my tosses could’ve played a part in the victory”. When Asahi and Noya stopped coming to the team, the only members left were Suga, Daichi and the 2nd years. Suga also took the blame and Daichi was there for him. He was shown secretly listening to Yamaguchi and Suga’s conversation about the mop (and comforted him that he shouldn't blame himself. I’m kinda disappointed they didn't include this in the anime). These panels show their trust and respect for each other.

He cant even dare to hurt Suga (but lets Suga punch him anytime) and he knows when Suga goes to overthinking mode. Also Suga knows Daichi so well i think i’m gonna cry. Scolding Daichi when he was not vocal during the game; Suga’s known for being the only one who can lecture Daichi. When Daichi told Suga and Asahi that it’s better to hand over the team to the 2nd yrs, Suga knew Daichi didn't mean that; Daichi felt hopeless because they lost again. He knew Daichi wanted to stay and play volleyball and step on the orange court.

He’s also used to Daichi’s stern mode. Daichi was also shown being the one who can keep Suga in control like “Suga please calm down”. Their relationship isn’t fully conveyed in the anime but i’m thankful that creators created drama cds, light novels, extras, spin-offs and haikyuu stage play to let us know more about the characters.

3. The team parents:

They always discuss about their team members like Suga asking Daichi about Kageyama and Hinata (kagehina bond ep) and Tsukishima. In the haikyuu drama cds “what if karasuno’s manager isn’t shimizu kiyoko” and “the reason behind the t-shirts” they were worried about entrusting the manager’s job to Tanaka, Noya and Hinata. When the team was hungry because Kiyoko wasn’t there, Suga told Daichi to take action so he assigned the weird duo to buy foods for the team and they were the ones who planned for the names of the shirts with the help of Noya, Kiyoko was pissed at the two because they were busy thinking of their own shirts. In the haikyuu light novel “the last summer vacation” (Sources: 1|2) Suga watched the team with worry on his face because it was so hot so he approached Daichi and expressed his concern that the team will get sick from the heat. Coach Ukai overheard the discussion and called a meeting. They’re usually seen together in every scene in the anime, stage play, haikyuu light novel, extras, manga, spin-offs and drama cds, scolding Tanaka, Noya, Hinata, Kageyama and Tsukishima; discussing volleyball stuffs; and buying pork buns for the team. In the lets haikyuu and extras (hq spin-off) it’s actually semi-canon they’re karasuno’s team parents. They also have this karasuno christmas bonding tradition.

It was also STATED BY THE DIRECTOR IN THE HQ MAGAZINE AND THE VOICE ACTORS THAT DAICHI AND SUGA ARE THE TEAM PARENTS AND TANAKA’S THE BIG BROTHER (here are the links: 1| 2|3)

IT’S CANON!!!!!! IT’S DAMN RIGHT CANON!!!!!TEAM PARENTS DAISUGA IS CANON!!!!!!

4. Teasing, bickering and just them being dorks:

Suga teasing daichi is my jam. In the HQ LN “Yachi’s delivery mission” (Sources 1|2), this conversation frickin made me squeal like a mouse with laryngitis. After practice the team was thirsty and wanted something cold to eat. “It’s indeed hot, lets get ice pops before we head home” daichi stated then frickin SLY/LIL SHIT SUGA JUST CASUALLY SAID THIS REMARK “Oh that’s not a bad idea, are you going to treat us Daichi-san” HE FRICKIN ADDED -SAN. So the team didn't let the opportunity go away they screamed with joy and thanked Daichi. After what happened Daichi just glared at Suga who was smiling at him. Daichi’s a softie when Suga’s involved. Suga got Daichi to buy ice cream for the team. I REPEAT HQ LN SHOULD BE ANIMATED.

Daichi knows when Suga’s about to do something stupid and his antics. They argued about this. When Suga was mad at Daichi because he was implying that the last year shrine visit was nothing; he was so pissed he started fuming at daichi. Suga also told Daichi that steak just being steak is better over diced steak. Hyped suga and daichi trying to calm him down is the cutest shit. In the HQ LN “Tokyo Expedition: Captains’ Meeting”(Sources: 1|2), Daichi warned Suga about Kuroo because he knows how to read minds and loves mind games and Suga was like ‘you need to chill Daichi’. When it was Suga’s turn to pick a card from Daichi’s deck he picked the joker and twitched his brows, Daichi whispered at Suga telling him whenever he drew the joker his brows twitch so Suga massaged his brows. I REPEAT AGAIN THIS SHOULD BE ANIMATED. The other captains and vice captains are competing against each other but look at these frickin idiots they are helping each other. DAICHI OBSERVING SUGA THEN WARNED HIM ABOUT HIS TENDENCY OF TWITCHING HIS EYEBROWS. IM GONNA FRICKIN DO A BACKFLIP. Also Daichi and Suga love to make fun of asahi but when you frickin hurt asahi these two will frickin punch you in the face. Frickin daisugasting dorks.

5. They are always together and in sync:

In the manga, anime, extras, stage play, light novel, drama cds and official art/merchandise they’re usually frickin together and always in sync, same reactions and thoughts. Remember when Daichi looked at Suga (S1 ep24) like he was asking for approval then Suga nodded. That was so cute ugh.

Extras:

Suga is 6 months older than Daichi. June 13 and December 31. Their birth dates makes me go WAIT WHAT.

Suga and Daichi’s name meanings are compatible.

During the christmas bonding time, Suga received daichi’s gift, a daruma. Daichi bought it as a gift because it weighs like a volleyball (he’s such a volleyball nerd) and he told Suga that they should draw the eye together. (Source link)

Suga thought that Daichi was jealous of his t-shirt because the phrase on his shirt was cooler than his. (Source link)

Suga’s first synchronize attack was a success and he tossed it to Daichi. Coach Ukai assigned these two along with Tanaka to learn synchronize attack.(Remember when Daichi told Suga he borrowed coach ukai’s tablet so they can watch the videos together)

The way they look at each other like there’s nothing else to look at.

What I truly love about these two is their relationship and trust for each other.They complement each other, which makes them a good combination. They went through obstacles and look THEY MADE IT TO THE NATIONALS, kiyoko witnessed their progress and asahi thanked suga and daichi because they welcomed him again in the team, remember when asahi was not sure if they’d accept him to the team but daichi and suga were just laughing and made fun of him.

Their vice captain and captain interaction isn't fully expressed in the anime and i hope that everyone will appreciate them more! They made it to nationals! And them being proud of Hinata and Kageyama in the hq time skip is one of the best treasures Furudate sensei gave to us.

Lets talk about these two. Daisugasting volleyball idiots.

I rest my case.

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lizaloveslevihan · 3 years

Note

if you have some angsty writing energy rn: hc where jean notices that hange hasn’t fully grieved or come to terms with erwin and moblit’ deaths, so he gets over his fear of levi to ask him with how to help hange because he’s so concerned for her

Title: Hange-san

Ao3 Link: Here

Notes: I also got some inspiration from this beautiful art I saw on Twitter.

They weren’t really close by any standards. Thinking about it, they probably just had two or three conversations the entire time Jean had known him. But his utter devotion was enough to catch anyone’s attention. If he wasn’t screaming at her to take care of herself, he did it silently by running each tiny errand and sticking with her like glue. He always walked by her side — shoulders hunched from obvious stress, hair a little unkempt, but hazel eyes as bright as ever, taking in every word she said despite the obvious dark circles underneath them. It was almost as if her personality and lifestyle were being injected into him, giving him life.

Jean hadn’t really understood the nature of their relationship before — couldn’t comprehend the idea of someone so willing to put up with Hange-san’s eccentricities and borderline craziness, day in and day out, especially given their slightly above average wages. It hadn’t seemed romantic at first glance by any means (he would have gotten a different vibe from them if it were the case) but rather, it was fueled and strengthened by a strong sense of loyalty and attentiveness. Those in the Survey Corps had dedicated their hearts to fighting titans and ensuring freedom for humanity, and though vice-captain Moblit Berner essentially did the same, it was as if a large chunk of his heart was dedicated only to Hange-san.

Jean paused, taking that new idea in. He stood outside the newly-appointed commander’s office, the journal he found tucked securely at his side. He had been hesitant to see her, especially after yesterday. She had asked him privately, eyes devoid of any emotion, tone full of anguish, if he could clean and clear out the former vice captain’s room. He understood her pain and had somehow expected this request — they were all grieving, having lost all those people — but he didn’t expect to feel pain over the task given to him.

His room was neat enough when Jean entered it yesterday morning. The bed was made, the shelves free of dust, and each article of clothing folded neatly inside his small closet. The only thing out of place was his desk which had mountains of paperwork that still lay on top of it.

He didn’t know him that well. They weren’t really close. But as Jean shuffled through and organized every piece of paper, every work of art, each sketch of an unfamiliar face, he felt his chest tightening. He vaguely remembered the vice-captain being an excellent artist, but he didn’t realize just how talented he was.

For some reason, he wasn’t surprised to see Hange-san’s face more so than the others. He had drawn her messy hair and wild eyes so perfectly that Jean felt as if he wasn’t worthy to even touch those pieces of paper. Some of them were hastily drawn, some with exquisite detail. He also saw sketches of her with captain Levi, and his eyes widened at one particular portrait where he was drawn gripping his teacup and smiling at her tenderly.

Damn it, Jean thought as he gingerly placed those papers back down on the desk. He would have loved to take lessons from the vice-captain if he only knew just how amazing he was. He had always been passionate about making art and drawing things he saw in his dreams back when he was younger. But of course, he had buried it in the face of reality. Seeing these sketches lit up a fire inside him. A fire that both consisted of his long-lost passion and the grief and sorrow he had tried to conceal ever since they returned from Shiganshina. He had looked around the room and let out a deep breath. No, he couldn’t allow himself to linger too much on those thoughts. He knew if he kept thinking about the warm, artistic vice-captain, he would be plunged into a deep abyss. He knew he wouldn’t be able to stop seeing every single face that they lost, especially him. Especially that warm, freckled face full of joy and compassion. That face which had looked at him with so much respect and admiration.

Shaking his head, he forced his mind to turn blank. He started to stack all those papers neatly on top of one another, finally freeing the desk of its mess. However, that was what exactly led him to find the dreaded journal whose contents would continue to haunt him for the rest of the day.

Jean shook his head and looked up, staring at the door to her office. He had been plagued by those thoughts since that task. The commander had ordered him to drop all of his things in her office and so far Jean had made two trips without her being in there. He had a feeling, however, she was behind those doors this time around. He internally debated with himself if he should enter now or wait for her to go to town, seeing as she had a meeting with Zackley later today. However, before he could even decide, the door swung open. Jean jumped up, a little startled, and was met with captain Levi’s usual impassive expression.

“What are you doing here, Jean?” the captain asked, raising an eyebrow. He crossed his arms and lingered at the doorway.

“I, uh,” Jean started, scratching the back of his neck and trying to keep eye contact as much as possible, “I’m here to hand the commander some of—”

“It’s Hange,” the captain cut him off, now closing the door behind him. “I know you’re obligated to call her by that title, and that’s fine for formal occasions, but I want you to keep calling her what you and the other brats call her as much as possible, alright?”

The captain didn’t elaborate any further, which made Jean a little uneasy. He gripped the journal tighter and nodded. He already had a good feeling as to why he would ask such a thing.

“At ease,” the captain spoke quietly, placing a hand on Jean’s shoulder. “You and the brats did well.” Jean looked down and saw… pride? relief? emotions that weren’t normally seen behind the captain's light gray eyes. He allowed himself to briefly recall what had happened on the rooftop. How the captain kept moving forward despite all the pain and loss he endured was unbeknownst to Jean. But then again, that’s what all of them have been doing ever since they joined the Survey Corps, wasn’t it? Is this how his life would always be like? Taking in loss after loss and moving forward from each friend? Forced to kill others with no hesitation? Valuing certain lives and sacrificing others? Clearing out each empty bedroom after every mission? As he was nearing that dark abyss, the captain pulled him out by saying: “Don’t blame yourself with what happened with Reiner, alright? If I only had killed him before he transformed, maybe we wouldn’t have been in this goddamn mess.” the captain recalled briefly, shaking his head and scrunching his eyebrows, “Hange’s inside. Don’t linger too much. She still has a lot of things to do.” and with that, he made his way past Jean and went off across the hallway.

Jean couldn’t help but stare after the captain. He had already come to terms with the fact that it was him who let Reiner get away. That it had all been his fault. But here was the captain, who, the same as Hange-san, took the blame and responsibility for letting the armored and beast titan escape. He felt that it came from more than their positions as superior officers but from their genuine kindness. Their desire to look over everyone. He felt both comforted and pained because of it.

He also couldn't help but think of what the vice-captain had said about captain Levi in his journal...

He shook his head once again. They needed time. He needed time. He already had enough things to deal with because of the damn journal. With a deep sigh, he walked towards the commander’s office and knocked thrice on the door. After he heard a small, muffled “come in,” he pushed it open and was surprised to see her not behind her desk, but standing by the window, looking out at the training grounds across them.

“I’ve brought the last of his things, Hange-san,” Jean said as he closed the door behind him. When she didn’t respond, he shuffled his feet nervously and looked around the office. Bookshelves were covering both sides of the wall, a large desk pressed at the very back, littered with numerous paperwork and books, and the two large windows on either side of which. It felt a little stuffy if he were being completely honest. He had been to Hange-san’s lab before where things were much more chaotic and disorganized, but much more full of life. This place, well, felt like it didn’t belong to her at all.

Which was pretty much a given, considering she had just moved in. The place still embodied the late and great Erwin Smith.

After a few seconds passed, she finally turned around and flashed him a small smile.

It was obviously forced.

“Thank you, Jean,” she spoke, walking up to him and gently taking the journal from his outstretched hands. Her lips pressed into a thin line as she inspected the object. “I… forgot this existed.”

Jean simply nodded, not really knowing what to say. He still felt incredibly awkward.

The commander kept looking at the old, worn-out book as she took a seat behind her desk. She still hadn’t removed the bandages that covered her damaged eye. “This was what he always carried around whenever we did the experiments on those titans. Even if we weren’t doing them, actually. I remember him telling me how his life’s work was here, should he die in the field. How I should inherit it, on the assumption that I’d live longer than him…”

Jean would have had no problem with this conversation if only he didn’t open the book and flipped through the pages himself. Yes, he would be pained, but not as pained if he didn’t read through the long letters that the vice-captain had left in that book. If he hadn’t digested every tiny sketch and word. He had no business in doing so, perhaps he could even get punished should Hange-san find out what he had done, but he couldn’t help the curiosity that sparked within him. Only if he could turn back time. He wished he’d never read those letters. It was just too much.

“He… saved you, didn’t he Hange-san?” Jean muttered respectfully, his body incredibly stiff. She looked up at him, her face just so tired. “When Bertholdt transformed, he pushed you to safety…?”

“I knew it would come to that one day.” the commander said both wistfully and solemnly, “I’ve always been a handful. Careless. Absentminded. Reckless.” she listed off, drumming her fingers on the wooden desk, “I keep getting too close to the mouths of titans. I was more than okay with dying. Especially if it meant I had contributed one way or another to humanity’s freedom. There was this myth I had read before, you know? It was in a storybook meant for children to warn them to never leave the walls.”

At this, she stood up and started walking around the room. “It was a tale of this child who was given wings by his uncle, or was it his father? I couldn’t quite remember. They were trying to escape and leave this tower by flying away. The older man had warned him not to fly too close to the sun, but the boy, being this curious little thing, didn’t listen. Thus, his wings were burned and he fell to his death.” the commander laughed bitterly, her fingers trailing the bookshelves on the left side of the room, “He had always warned me not to fly too close to the sun, Jean. But I still did. Instead of me, it was him who suffered the consequences. It makes me wonder… what if one day, I’ll have this chance again? What if I fly, soaring through the clouds, and my recklessness or heroism or whatever the rest of you would call it, would cause me to fly too close to the sun?”

Jean wanted to leave. He didn’t like the words that were coming out of the commander’s mouth. He wanted to shut himself in his room and maybe sleep this whole thing off. He didn’t want to think about her dying, or anyone for that matter, especially after the loss they were still trying to deal with. That story upset him more than he realized, especially since it didn’t seem too far-fetched at this point, considering all the gruesome deaths he had seen. He knew it was the grief talking and the pressure from her new position, but still, it unnerved him to see someone he always knew was filled with life looking so dead inside.

“You meant a lot to him, Hange-san,” Jean replied, trying to keep the emotion from his voice. You meant a lot to him more than anyone in this world, if he were being completely honest. “We always want to keep the people we care about safe, sometimes even if it means sacrificing our lives. He will always live on, in you — in us. You don’t have to carry this burden alone.”

Jean didn’t really know what he was saying — the words he uttered felt meaningless in the grand scheme of things — but he knew they were words that needed to be said. After reading those things, well, he felt as if he needed to give her as much assurance as possible.

The commander gave him a tight-lipped smile, her remaining eye tearing up. She approached him, and it was only then Jean finally noticed how she had a slight limp in her step. How her shoulders were tight and slumped forward. She placed a hand on his shoulder and nodded at him. “Thank you, Jean. You don’t know how much that means to me. You’re a great kid and I hope you know that you’ve proven to be an invaluable asset to not only the Survey Corps but to humanity as well. And,” Jean met her eye and his chest tightened once again in seeing it glimmer with a sense of pride, “thank you for cleaning Moblit’s room. I could have done it myself but…”

“I understand, Hange-san,” Jean said, his voice surprisingly reassuring despite the overwhelming amount of emotions he felt. She finally said his name. “I really do.”

The commander smiled a little brighter this time — the most genuine one yet, “Thank you.” and Jean felt that statement didn’t only apply to this situation. “Once we settle everything with Zackley, I’ll let you kids take a much-needed break. You mentioned your mother lives in Trost, is that right?”

“Yes, along with the rest of my family,” Jean replied, the prospect of seeing his mother again warming him up. He still wasn’t able to visit her due to the situation at hand, but he was eager to finally do so. He had always been reluctant in the past due to his embarrassment, but now he understood how superficial those fears were. He was so lucky, luckier than most, that he still had a family to go back to at the end of the day.

The commander nodded before squeezing his shoulder. “Make sure the rest of your squad finishes up their reports, alright? I want them on my desk tomorrow morning.”

“Understood, Hange-san.” Jean nodded in return, offering her a small smile.

She finally stepped away and Jean took this opportunity to carefully walk to the door. However before he could open it, the commander called him once more.

“Don’t blame yourself over anything, alright?” she said, crossing her arms, her voice now laced with a sense of authority, “It was always my decision. It was always my responsibility. I hope you remember that.”

He felt a knife pierce at his heart from her words — the same words the captain had told him no less than twenty minutes ago. He recalled the letters he had read from the vice captain’s journal and Jean couldn’t help but smile at the thought. He wondered briefly if he should get Hange-san to leave for her meeting with Zackley first before opening up the book and reading through everything in it, something Jean was sure she was going to do once he left her alone. But how could he possibly tell her without causing suspicion? How could he possibly tell her that whatever she was about to read could potentially break her? More so than she already was?

He couldn’t, because he shouldn’t have read those things in the first place. He shouldn’t have let his curiosity get the best of him. So instead, he simply nodded and quietly muttered a “thank you” before leaving.

He went down the other hallway to make sure he wouldn’t come across captain Levi. He needed to clear his thoughts before he could face them anytime soon. Jean wondered what his reaction would be if he read those letters as well. He let out a large sigh. Either way, it couldn’t possibly be as bad as Hange-san’s.

*******

The next couple of days had been surprisingly normal enough. They had filed reports, went into countless meetings after the other to discuss the situation regarding what they had found in Shiganshina, all the while still sending letters to each family who had lost a member in the battle. He didn’t see much of the commander other than the times they had to present themselves to Zackley, during which she acted completely fine — delivering each line with that of a smooth and authoritative manner. Other than that, she was gone — either in her office or delivering each letter of condolence personally. When he heard of that, his respect for her had grown even more immensely. She was an unbelievably kind and compassionate leader, and Jean felt even more honored to be working with her.

The promised day-off eventually came. Hange-san could only give everyone three days, seeing as recruits were going to be entering the Corps soon which meant Jean and the rest of his friends had to work on training them. Either way, he was glad to be getting some time to spend with his family. His mother was for sure going to dote on him to no end, but surprisingly, he was looking forward to it.

Already dressed in his civilian attire with his carry-on pack by his shoulder, Jean made his way to the commander’s office once more to inform them of his departure. He had visited Sasha earlier at the hospital and was pleased to know that she would be discharged later today and would be going to her family straight after. He offered to wait for her and drop her off himself, still wary of her injury, but Connie had offered to do it in his place. Eren, Mikasa, and Armin having no place to go opted to go around town for the day, and Floch had already left to visit his own family which basically meant Jean was the only one left in headquarters.

He finally rounded the corner and was about to knock on the old wooden door when he heard a loud crash followed by a screaming match. He immediately stepped back, feeling his blood run cold at the sounds. Only two people could possibly be behind those doors, and he didn’t like that he was hearing any of these things right now. He was lucky that the doors were thick enough to muffle the details of their conversation or their screaming match, but he still picked up on certain sentences.

“He would know exactly what to do next!”

“You’re not supposed to be him! Don’t you understand that?!”

Should I just leave? Make a run for it? Hange-san would surely understand, Jean thought to himself, panic building up in his chest. He recalled that time in his childhood where his parents would fight over food or jobs or whatever adults had fought about. He always felt uncomfortable and disheartened, thinking his parents hated each other and would never get along again. He didn’t like seeing the ugly things that had transpired between them. However, before he could even decide, the door suddenly slammed open, but this time, instead of captain Levi, Hange-san came out, walking briskly and angrily. She didn’t even notice Jean standing there and moved past him, shoulders scrunched together, a frustrated hand running through her already messy hair.

“Oi! Hange!” captain Levi exclaimed, suddenly appearing by the door frame, running a hand through his hair as well. The bags under his eyes were deeper, as usual, his cravat loose around his neck. His cheeks were slightly flushed, but it was obvious it was not in a good way. He was about to kick the door frame when he finally noticed Jean.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

His voice was a little hoarse, and a chill ran down Jean’s spine as he took all of it in. This was too personal, this was none of his business, and so why was he getting roped in again?

“I was just about to report my departure to Hange-san—”

“Well, she’s obviously not here anymore,” the captain cut off in frustration, his eyes narrowing up at him. Jean didn’t like how he was seeing a new side to captain Levi, didn’t like seeing him so frustrated and lost. “Goddamnit what have I done…” he muttered to himself.

Jean could have just told him he was leaving. He could have just nodded and excused himself, headed straight to the stables, and made his way back to Trost. They would eventually forget about this incident as it would cool down, and all would be well.

But Jean remembered the letters. He remembered those words. He remembered her tired, broken expression from days ago. Jean knew what it was like to be a leader — to have people look up to you and count on you. He knew how it felt to think you weren't good enough, to think you weren’t special and how people shouldn’t trust you because you lacked certain skills or that you weren’t perfect enough. He looked at the captain, stared right into those intimidating gray eyes, and felt a surge of confidence within him.

“Captain, you know her better than anyone else,” Jean spoke, reiterating the Moblit Berner’s words, “What can I do to help her?”

The captain was slightly taken aback by Jean’s words. He raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms, studying him carefully. “Why are you—”

“Because I care about her.” Jean said firmly, “And I respect her. And I want to help.”

Captain Levi simply stared at him. Jean would be lying if he said he didn’t feel awkward. They were still soldiers, after all. Captain Levi was still his superior officer, and having heart-to-heart conversations was something they didn’t essentially do. There wasn’t any room for sharing feelings — it opened up vulnerability and that was something you couldn’t have out in the field. Especially since the battlefield they now had was much wider than before.

Jean was prepared to get shrugged off. He was prepared to leave without getting any answers. But the captain had sighed, fixed the cravat around his neck, and spoke softly: “Come inside.”

It was now Jean’s turn to be taken aback. Nevertheless, he followed the captain inside and was even more taken aback by the sight in front of him.

The commander’s desk and seat were turned upside down, forcibly, he presumed, with books and papers scattered around it. He stopped in the middle of the room and heard the captain sigh as he closed the door behind him. “Help me fix this shit, Jean. I can’t have this lying around here.”

Jean didn’t ask any more questions. He already knew the answers as to how this had happened. He wanted to know why, of course, to satisfy his curiosity, but at the same time, he didn’t. He dropped his satchel on the floor and proceeded to pick up the scattered papers and books, making sure not to step on them as much as possible. The captain also did the same, kneeling down and gathering everything in his arms. Once they were finished, they placed everything on the corner of the room, underneath the right window, and started to turn the desk upright once more. Jean took one side, the captain taking the other, and together they lifted and placed it back where it had originally sat. After which, Jean took the chair and pushed it back against it while the captain took the books and paper and placed everything neatly the desk. They worked in silence the entire time — the friction from their fight or whatever had happened in here a few moments ago, still lingered and Jean was afraid to pierce through it.

“I had served under two commanders,” the captain said suddenly as he filed through each piece of paper. Jean looked up and stared at him. “Shadis was alright — you already know most of his story anyway, but he was still a good leader. He had the drive, but still lacked some of the talents. And then Erwin came along…”

Captain Levi let out a deep sigh as he started inserting some of the papers in between the pages of a book. “Erwin... was a special man. He was one of the greatest assets to humanity. I don’t think I really need to tell you any more now, do I?”

He was right. Erwin Smith had been a special man. He was one of the greatest minds Jean had ever seen. He was an incredible strategist, an inspirational and respectable figure — all that and more. He had a feeling, however, that it wasn’t really about that. Jean was sure the captain just didn’t want to talk about him in general, at the moment. And really, who could blame him? Especially after what had happened on the rooftop?

Jean shook his head and looked down. A few tense seconds passed before the captain continued: “He never made any miscalculations. We all had a feeling Hange would be next in line and we had been right. Hange was the only one who had stood up to him, the one to push forward ridiculous and extreme ideas that could have gotten all of us killed. She thought differently and wanted to look at things from a different perspective. Hange…” at this, Jean looked up to see the captain’s expression light up, “was always the best choice. All of us knew this. All of us but her.”

He sighed and started to mindlessly look through some of the books now. “It’s not easy, being in her position. She thinks she doesn’t deserve it. But she does. I’ve been with Hange for a long time now, Jean. I know you brats are there, but we’re the only ones who just… have each other left. She was there when I had first entered the Corps and had been with me ever since. But Erwin and Moblit? They had been with her way before I was ever in the picture.”

It was the first time he had mentioned the vice captain’s name, and Jean had to stop himself from thinking too much about the letters again. One would think he’d get over it at this point, but it was much harder than he thought.

He continued once more: “Anyway, I’ve never been good with this shit, Jean. But you brats are just real nosey, huh?” he said, and Jean couldn’t tell if he was being serious or playful — maybe both. “The truth is, you being concerned and sticking your nose up to where it doesn’t belong is already helpful. You being here, following each command, and being the leader that you are is helpful. Just by staying alive, you’re already helpful. You, well, you’re already fucking helpful if you ask me. Hange knows this, and it may not look like it, but she’s thankful for all the little shit you and the brats do.”

It had taken him a few seconds to fully understand what the captain had meant, but he eventually did. Jean didn’t know what kind of answer he was expecting, but those words flowed through his heart and made him feel good inside. He didn’t realize he was already doing enough. He was just doing the bare minimum, wasn't he? But the captain had a point. If he continued to stay by their side, to stay by Hange-san’s side and follow her wherever she had lent them, then it could help erase the doubts she had regarding her position. Just by staying alive, he was helping her feel better. Just by being there for as long as possible — just like Moblit and Erwin, like captain Levi — was enough.

But he also had a feeling that the captain didn’t want him, or any of his friends, to worry about their situation. He couldn’t explain it, but those were just the sort of parents did for their children. And though Jean would probably never admit it, Hange-san and the captain were quickly stepping up to be parental figures to them already.

The captain finally took out a single piece of paper from the stacks and held it up slightly. Jean saw it had been the sketch of him and Hange-san, and he couldn’t help but smile at the sight.

“Vice-captain Moblit was really talented, wasn’t he?” Jean finally spoke up. The captain nodded in front of him and traced the outline of Hange-san’s smiling face on paper.

Captain Levi’s lips twitched a little upright. “He really was.”

*******

Though the journey back home was a long and tedious one, Jean was grateful to have had the time to himself to ponder on his thoughts. Captain Levi ordered him, or was it a friendly suggestion? not to speak about this to Hange-san. He then parted to look for her which enabled Jean to finally leave.

He thought a lot about the letters, about the myth Hange-san had told him days ago, about the captain’s words, and even about the late commander Erwin.

The sun was setting when he had arrived home. As he passed through the neighborhood he grew up in, he couldn't help but feel both excited and terrified. The threat of the titans was now over, right? But now they were facing an even bigger menace. Would his home be safe? Would the people they had fought so long to protect inside the walls be safe?

“Jean-boy!”

He turned and saw her face. She stood at the front of their house which surprisingly looked the same after all this time. She was excitedly waving her hand, and once he got closer, he saw that tears were falling from her eyes. Once he stopped in front of her, he quickly dismounted his horse and enveloped him in her arms.

“You’ve grown so big! Oh my boy!” she exclaimed, clutching the back of his shirt and pressing her face against his chest. Jean hugged her back eagerly and tried his best not to let his emotions take over. But it had been a long couple of days. His body still ached from the battle, his brain was consumed by too many thoughts, and his heart still grieved the lives of all of the people they had lost. He couldn’t believe he had taken her warmth and comfort for granted so many times. Who did he think he was, trying to shove her out of his life because he didn’t want to be embarrassed?

“I’m home, mom,” he said, finally closing his eyes and inhaling her scent. She laughed happily before disentangling herself a little, looking up at him to study his face. Her eyes were watery, the lines around them having deepened. Her hair also started to have gray streaks and Jean felt his heart ache at the sight of her much older form. “I have your favorite already waiting for you in the kitchen. I also cleaned your room so you better change and wash up before we eat dinner, alright? I’m so glad you’re here my Jean-boy.” she said, hugging him again.

He truly was home.

*******

A wave of nostalgia hit him the moment he had entered his childhood room. True to her word, everything was neat and tidy. His bed was made, desk free of any clutter, and the window was left a little open to let some of the breezes go in. He exhaled, closing the door behind him and moving to lay on his bed. He was both physically and emotionally exhausted and wanted nothing more now than to close his eyes and sleep. He wondered what the others were doing at this very moment. They had been through together so much that it felt weird not to have any of them near him. It was probably the first time in a long time he was going to sleep in his bed, in his own room, without anyone else around. Letting out a deep sigh, he willed himself to stand up, grab the satchel he had brought with him, and place the contents atop his desk.

As he rummaged through his things, he wondered if there was something he still could do for Hange-san. Though he took the captain’s words to heart, he couldn’t help but feel like doing something for her either way. Something that wasn’t too outrageous that would give her the wrong idea. Something that he himself would do, something that was uniquely his. Afterall, the captain said that just by doing what he did, he would be able to help. He eventually found his answer when he opened one of the drawers of his desk and found his old sketches and art supplies from long ago.

He immediately stopped what he was doing and gingerly took out his old artworks. The passion he felt was still there, tingling the back of his neck as he stared at the portrait of the woman he had seen in his dreams. His lips tightened as he realized that the woman he had drawn resembled Mikasa so much. He really only had eyes for her from the very beginning, huh? Shaking his head, he looked through some of his old work and realized then and there exactly what he needed to do.

He may not be as good as the vice-captain, but it was the least he could do. Besides, maybe once he went through with this little project, he would finally be able to release all his thoughts about this matter. He was relieved to see there was still some paper and pencils left. Nodding his head, he closed the window, placed the papers back down, and proceeded to change into a cleaner and much more comfortable shirt. He’ll have time to do this later after dinner. But for now, there some much-needed time to be spent with his family.

*******

He found himself back in front of the commander’s office once again, days later. This time, he carried with him two scrolls of paper. He stopped and listened intently, making sure no one was arguing behind the doors before knocking.

He let himself in the moment he heard Hange-san’s voice. She was seated behind her desk, finally sporting a dark patch on her injured eye. “Ah, welcome back, Jean. Did you need anything from me?” she asked as Jean closed the door behind him.

“I just came by to drop some things off for you, Hange-san,” he spoke lightly, feeling incredibly nervous. He scratched the back of his head as he approached her quietly.

She looked so much better this time around. She had discarded her military coat and her bolo tie was tied securely around her neck for the world to see. Her glasses were impeccably clean and gleamed when she looked up at him, her hair nicely framing her face. She seemed much more relaxed, and it didn’t feel like when she was going through meetings and such where she acted fine. This time, she actually did look genuinely alright and at peace.

Jean wondered how she and the captain had spent those three days. He had a feeling, once again, that they had spent it together. He could tell that the captain had something to do with the improved state she was currently in. Either way, Jean was happy to see her like this.

“I… had seen vice-captain Moblit’s sketches,” Jean started right off at the bat, not wanting to make a bigger deal out of this than it already was. He saw more than the sketches, of course, but she didn’t need to know that. The commander didn’t look upset or surprised, which made Jean continue: “And I had been sort of an artist too, you see, but obviously not as good as him.”

He carefully handed her the two scrolls of paper, and she raised an eyebrow before taking it from his grasp. “When I returned home and saw my old work, I realized that I wanted to do something for you, Hange-san. No one put me up to this, and I hope, for my sake, you don’t tell the others.”

He added that last part, a light blush dusting his cheeks. If any of his friends found out about his old hobby, they would tease him to no end and demand to see some of his old work.

She carefully inspected the two scrolls before putting down the second one and gingerly opening the first. She gasped, her hand flying straight to her mouth as she looked on and stared at the portrait in front of her.

“Oh Jean…” she said, her voice cracking with emotion, “I can’t believe you did this.”

Jean had a pretty good memory of things. He remembered the vice captain’s worried, concerned face. He remembered the former commander’s authoritative expression. And of course, how could he forget captain Levi’s tiny smirk or Hange-san’s bright eyes?

It felt awkward, putting those visions on paper. He felt his heart clench at the sight of his portraits. But he powered through, and Hange-san’s expression made it all worth it.

She traced her fingers over the etched lines. She lingered, he noticed, over commander Erwin’s and vice-captain Moblit’s face. She smiled and laughed brightly as tears now streamed from her remaining eye. Jean had drawn them all together, side by side, arms around one another. It had been a product of his imagination, but he had to admit it wasn’t as bad as he thought.

“Why? How?” she said, her voice breaking. She placed down the paper and gently removed her glasses to wipe some of the tears from her face.

Jean looked down and shuffled his feet, “He never really had any portraits of all of you together. I thought well, that shouldn’t be the case.”

“Do I even want to know what’s in the other one?” she said teasingly before clearing her throat and putting her glasses back on. Her smile was absolutely infectious, and Jean was happy it was seemingly etched permanently onto her face.

“I think you do,” he said, clearing his throat as well. That particular portrait was the first one he had finished, and he loved how it had turned out. He was also grateful for the creative outlet. He had to admit, he missed indulging in these kinds of things. Who knew when the next time he’d be able to do something like this again?

Hange-san laughed — a bright and beautiful melody that continued to light up the room. She shifted her attention to the unopened scroll, picked it up, and proceeded to unroll it. However, unlike the first one, she remained silent, her eyes widening at the sight. A few minutes had passed before she pursed her lips, her fingers shaking a little, before rolling it back up and setting it back down on her desk. She studied Jean carefully, and he could tell that perhaps she was picking up on the idea that he may have read those letters. Nevertheless, she stood up, shook her head, and quickly strolled to him and hugged him.

“Thank you, Jean,” she said after a few seconds, and Jean allowed himself to snake his hands behind her and hug her back. He closed his eyes and a small part of him reprimanded himself for being so soft, for sticking his nose into other people’s business, for doing all of these rather embarrassing things. But life was short. He needed to express his feelings to others before it was too late. He needed to tell people he cared about them before it was too late. He felt the magnitude of her gratitude from those small, common words. From the way she had tightly clutched the back of his shirt. They pulled away — the hug being a rather brief and short thing, just as captain Levi entered the room.

“What are you two doing?” he asked, closing the door behind him and crossing his arms. Jean turned around to see a curious and wary expression on his face. Hange-san laughed behind him, and Jean then and there witnessed how the captain softened at the sound. His shoulders relaxed, his lips parted slightly, and his eyes gleamed in wonder.

“Nothing,” Hange-san sang as she approached him. “Are you ready to go?”

“The horses are already waiting for us,” the captain said gruffly, but Jean could tell he was pleasantly surprised by the commander’s tone and attitude. “What are you and Jean—”

“I’ll tell you later, okay?” she spoke heartily, moving to grab her civilian coat from the coat stand by the door. “We’ll be meeting with some of the press, alright Jean? We’ll be back later tonight. I believe Levi over here is planning on cooking for everyone.”

“Oi! That was supposed to be a secret!” the captain exclaimed, his eyes sneering at her. Hange-san shrugged before approaching Jean and laying a hand on his shoulder. She smiled at him once again which Jean reciprocated. She whispered another “thank you” before patting his head affectionately. “Please don’t tell the others, Hange-san,” he spoke quietly, only for her to hear.

“I won’t.” she assured, “But you have to know that I can’t keep anything from this grump right here,” she said, her head tilting towards the captain’s direction.

“What are you idiots talking about?” the captain eyed suspiciously, moving to approach them.

“I know.” Jean scoffed, his eyes gleaming. Hange-san nodded before swiftly looping her arm around the captain’s and dragging him out the room. “Come on! We’re going to be late!”

Jean followed them out the door and saw their figures moving down the hallway. Captain Levi stopped her suddenly as if asking her once again what she and Jean had been doing. The commander laughed before patting his head affectionately which then made the captain gently kick her leg. He then started to inspect her coat, straightening it out before buttoning the front. Jean shook his head at the soft and sweet gesture in front of him. He looked back inside the office to where the drawings he had and quietly went back in and approached the desk.

He carefully lifted the second scroll and opened it. He didn’t really know what kind of reaction he was expecting from Hange-san, but so far she didn’t really give away anything obvious. He was certain that she had read those letters. But it felt as if she just wanted to move on from them, and thinking about it, that would be the best course of action wasn’t it?

He stared at the portrait. They weren’t really close by any standards. Thinking about it, they probably just had two or three conversations the entire time Jean had known him. But his utter devotion was enough to catch anyone’s attention. Jean hoped he was able to catch them and had translated it properly on paper. There were hundreds of sketches of Hange-san and everyone else, but there weren’t any of just them together. He had drawn him the way he knew him — face scrunched up in concern as he looked onto her. He had a hand placed on her shoulder, and Hange-san was laughing at whoever was in front of her.

Slowly, with his other hand that wasn’t holding the portrait, Jean placed a fist over his heart in a salute.

Thank you for dedicating your heart.

*******

Dear Buntaichou,

I’ve decided to start writing to you like this in the event I should get a heart attack and die from your irresponsibility. I also needed to let out my frustration through a healthy matter. I really don’t understand as to why you would charge headfirst into a forest, all by yourself, and try to capture a titan. How you managed to get away with screaming at the commander and still having all your limbs attached today is a miracle. I’m glad Captain Levi and his squad were able to intervene and help stop you from getting eaten. I’m glad you’re okay. At this time, you’re currently locked in your room, devouring whatever is inside the notebook you found. Maybe you’ll finally be able to convince commander Erwin with your discoveries? Still, you could have died. No matter how much I try to stop you, you always try and go at it, huh?

That was so very stupid of you. How are you so brilliant and stupid at the same time?

— Moblit

*******

Dear Buntaichou,

DID YOU REALLY ALMOST FALL OFF THE WALL?! I’m so glad my grandmother forbade me to curse because I would have exclaimed a variety of colorful language at you during that entire situation.

It was our first test run of your titan capturing method, and all would have been well if you weren’t leaning too far and, I don’t know, SLIPPED?

It was a good thing captain Levi had incredible reflexes and had gotten to you just in time. He seems very attuned to whenever you put yourself in danger, isn’t he? I could have sworn he was just waiting for something bad to happen. I also could have sworn I was going to get a heart attack then and there.

Why are you so reckless and stupid? Great, now I feel bad for calling you that. But hey, I need to let it out, okay? Don’t take it personally. But then again, captain Levi pretty much calls you that daily and you seem to find it endearing.

I’m also so worried about when we start experimenting on titans. By the walls, you’re not going to make it easy for me, are you? Just please don’t die.

— Moblit

*******

Dear Buntaichou,

I knew you weren’t going to make things easy for me. I have to admit, you giving names to those titans was pretty strange — but it was still rather cute. Only if you weren’t going crazy about it.

I feel like I say that as if it’s a new thing. But then again, back in our training days, you were relatively calm. You always indulge yourself in books and go out of your way to try and learn new things. Those were nice and calm days, weren’t they? You’ve always piqued my interest from the very beginning especially since you were the only one who pronounced our instructor’s name wrong.

Why am I bringing this up? Anyway, if this is the last letter you read it means that I was eaten by Albert or whoever that other titan was. We can’t afford to lose you, you know? That’s one of the things I’ve learned so far anyway. That some lives in the Survey Corps matter more than the others, and I would gladly get eaten by a titan if it means you’d live another day.

I don’t mean to make you feel guilty or anything of the sort. This is just how I feel.

— Moblit

*******

Dear Buntaichou,

How do you do it? It seems you’re the only person (besides commander Erwin, well, it’s a given) who has full control over captain Levi. You’ve managed to persuade him to capture a titan for you, and though he complained about it, he still did it anyway.

Since you’ll never get these letters while I’m still alive, I can probably be as honest as possible.

I think that he has feelings for you.

Now, I hope by the time you read this, he’s made it obvious to you by then. And I know it seems like a stretch, cause well, he’s captain Levi and everything and he doesn’t seem like he’s capable of those types of emotions, but I’ve seen the way he looks at you.

I think it started when you ran off to the forest and he followed you. I read the reports of what had happened, and it seemed he was really shaken. We also work a lot with their squad, so there’s a lot of room for things to blossom then I suppose.

I know I sound incredibly foolish. And I’m telling you right now, I’m completely sober as I write this. But it’s just something I can tell, something that doesn’t seem too far-fetched. He cares about you a lot.

Now I need a drink. I don’t know what’s going on with me.

— Moblit

*******

Dear Buntaichou,

I think you have feelings for captain Levi.

This is an even more outrageous claim than the one in my previous entry, and because I’m always glued to your side, I feel like I know more than others do.

It’s been a while since I wrote my thoughts on here. It’s been a rough couple of days? Weeks? I forgot. So much has happened. I don’t want to delve too much into the details but essentially, we had engaged with the female titan outside the walls, then inside Stohess district, then the armored and colossal titan. I also finished investigating Ragako — Connie Springer’s village. I haven’t had enough rest these days. A lot of us haven’t. And though I feel incredibly exhausted and want to make use of these couple of days of peace before we head onto Trost, I felt like jotting some of the things I had witnessed between you and the captain.

I know this is really silly of me. But forgive me again, this is the only outlet I have. Don’t worry, I’ve already jotted down the important findings in the middle pages of this journal/sketchbook. But I’m starting to feel things myself. Feelings I didn’t know I could feel either.

Anyway, you had visited him when he was still in the hospital, getting some treatment for his injured leg. You had dismissed me that day, saying you were going to him.

I also had caught you lending him one of your jackets. And though he had protested, he still eagerly wore it.

Not to mention the number of times I had caught you making tea for him. How did I know? Well, no one else touched the tin of black tea in the mess hall but Captain Levi. So it had been an easy assumption.

There are a lot more instances, but I can’t seem to bring myself to put them on paper. I don’t know why — maybe there are just too many, maybe I just don’t want to recall them. I think maybe both.

Either way, it seems as if you two have feelings for one another now. I’m glad. I’m also glad that you’re okay, that you’re alive, that you’re still here. Hopefully, that will continue to last long.

— Moblit

*******

Dear Hange-san,

I think… that this will be my last letter.

I know it’s been a long time since I last updated this series of letters (we haven’t exactly had a lot of free time) and as we are preparing to return to Shiganshina, I felt the need to address everything here and now. Seeing as there’s a high probability I might not make it back.

The moment I first met you back when we were cadets in the Training Corps, you had captured my attention almost immediately. Your hair had been way shorter back then so there wasn’t any need to tie it up into a ponytail. Other than that, your eyes always remained bright, your laugh was always infectious. When you had told me back then how you wanted to see the world beyond the walls, I had thought you to be crazy. My family had always wanted me to enlist in the Garrison, especially since I had a lot of relatives there. But the moment you started talking about what life could be like, about different plants and trees, about different types of animals — the way you had smiled up at me and used your hands excessively to discuss your points — I knew then and there that I would follow you wherever you went.

Going into the Survey Corps was absolutely terrifying. But being with you, helping you, and staying by your side had made it worth it.

The amount of times you almost died, the amount of times you had put yourself in danger is just too much to count. The number of times you had made me worried — well, let’s just say I’m glad my heart didn’t suffer any complications. Or maybe it has and I just don’t know.

Seriously, you’re too reckless sometimes, you know? But I can’t help but admire you still. You do it because you desire to change because you want to understand our natural enemies. You’re the only one I’ve met who thinks that way, and people have mentioned more than once that you’re really crazy, and perhaps they’re right, but you’re also the most brilliant of all of them combined.

And because of this, you have captured my heart.

I’m sure there are more reasons, but I can’t find it in me to talk about all of them. I don’t know why this happened, how this happened, or if I was too obvious. But knowing you, you probably wouldn’t know if someone had romantic feelings for you even if it hit you straight in the face. After all, this is exactly what’s going on between you and captain Levi.

I know for certain now that he loves you. I had a hunch before, but I know now. I could tell by the nicknames he gave you, from how angry he was when you fell during our battle, how he went to visit you, multiple times, after that incident. How when he sees me alone in the corridor or something, he always asks about you. How in every mission we go, he always looks at you, as if he’s engraving your image into his memory should one of you not make it. How he captured a titan for you. How he knows how you take your tea and how he always goes to your side for comfort. How he basically forces you to take a bath. How he just knows you and understands your entirety as a human being.

It all makes sense now. I suppose, if you didn’t pay attention much to it, you’d think it was something else entirely. Just a comrade looking out for another comrade. But his eyes, oh his eyes always say otherwise. He loves you and I hope by the time you read this, you’re well aware of that fact.

And I also hope you’re well aware that you love him too.

I could tell by how you tease him almost to no end. By how you always talk about him, either positively or negatively. How you just know when he's around as if you have a keen sense just for him. How you translate his words for others (he’s not very good at those). How even when he’s fuming angry or irritated, you seem to be the only one who can get him to calm down. How you had visited him multiples times after his injury. How you just knew all that information about him living with Kenny the Ripper as if you two had discussed the life he had led before. How you know exactly how he takes his tea. How you always make it a point to celebrate his birthday despite our lack of funds. How you just know him and trust him so well.

You love him, Hange-san. You love him so much. Dare I say you love him as equally if not more as your titans and your research. What you two have is something so special I doubt anyone inside the walls has the same kind of bond.

I wanted that with you.

You both deserve happiness together. But I know that’s not possible. Especially with the world we live in.

I just wanted you to know this before it’s too late. I want you to know that should I never come back by your side, that you always have him. That he treasures you. Perhaps… even more than I do.

Enclosed in this journal are all the findings in research we collected through the years. And so are these letters. And so are some… portraits I had done myself. I hope you like them.

If you’re reading this, then that means you have survived and may or may not be the new commander. Hange-san, I hope you remember that you are life itself, that you are so brilliant and amazing, and that you continue to give others an inexpressible joy. You have enriched my life (despite almost killing me multiple times). I know you will do a fantastic job as commander. That’s because, well, you’re you. You’re Hange. I wish I could elaborate more but it is what it is.

There’s so much more I want to say. So much more I want to tell you. But there isn’t any time nor can I bring myself to put any of it on paper. You also should be expecting me on the training grounds in a couple of minutes from now to continue Eren’s experiments. So I suppose, I’ll just leave you with this:

… I love you.

Sincerely, Moblit Berner.

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lit-in-thy-heart · 3 years

Note

I'm so excited you've jouned in!!! 💕

You owe Merwaine some happiness after your VERY angsty episode analyses so I would love those two and Sleepy hug please!! 😍

@little-ligi i hope this makes up for the angst!!! thank you for sending a prompt and have merlin and gwaine falling asleep together when with the knights and arthur on a trip thing (unspecified) between s4 and s5 💕

once again, under the cut because this is the longest one yet...

Rearranging his cloak so it provided greater coverage from the brisk wind, Gwaine glanced over at the group who were gradually drifting off amongst the fallen foliage. Despite the undiluted thoughts that inevitably streamed through his head when on watch, Gwaine relished the uninterrupted opportunity to softly observe Merlin without having the eyes of the other knights on him. If he had an apple for every time one of them – usually Percival or Arthur, despite Elyan’s quiet requests for them to shut up – had called him out for supposedly undressing Merlin with his eyes, he would certainly have a bushel of them by now. Granted, Gwaine sometimes did have the habit of mentally undressing Merlin with his eyes when he looked at him, but more often than not the knight was simply gazing in wonder at how such a beautiful being had chosen to devote his life to Gwaine of all people.

Merlin had been out of his sight for the past couple of hours, having accompanied Elyan to retrieve firewood, but Gwaine knew that they were both exchanging new spells that they’d learnt over the past few weeks. Elyan had told Gwaine about his magic before Gwaine had even had his suspicions about Merlin confirmed. Or, rather, Gwaine had stumbled in on Elyan, when the call of nature had echoed in his head on the night they had first met, and had witnessed him throwing all five of Gwaine’s knives without touching a single one. Gwaine had been more bothered by the fact that he hadn’t even noticed that his knives were missing than by the fact that Elyan was a sorcerer. And then, several weeks later, after Merlin had confessed to Gwaine on the night they had found themselves in bed together after an evening in the tavern, Gwaine had told both Elyan and Merlin to meet him in the Darkling Woods, greeted them with the statement that they both had magic, and had left them to it. Although he forced his unwavering support onto Merlin at every given opportunity, Gwaine knew the value of having someone close who knew precisely the struggles being faced, and he was grateful that Merlin had that in Elyan, and vice versa.

With a smile, Gwaine’s gaze slid over to Merlin, cocooned in a blanket and laughing at some remark that Elyan had sleepily murmured, and he settled himself against a tree trunk, moving his eyes back to the space in front of him as he withdrew his sword and positioned it across torso, the point of the blade hovering dangerously close to his neck. It was probably best that he was keeping watch alone, so he wouldn’t get distracted by talking to someone – but it also meant that there was nobody to check him when his attention slid, as it always did, to Merlin. He squinted up at the sky, seeking out the moon. At least he wasn’t expected to keep watch all night. Not that there was much need. Perhaps it was somewhat of an invincibility complex but, ever since donning the cloak bearing Camelot’s emblem, Gwaine had felt untouchable. Almost. The cloak hadn’t made Lancelot untouchable. Setting his jaw, Gwaine took a deep breath and focused on the lazy wave of the leaves opposite, on the stars splattered across the deep canvas of the sky like a bloodstain, on the soft melody of the wind.

‘Come on, now, Gwaine, you know full well how hot you look when you hold a sword like that.’

Perhaps Gwaine, who had not noticed Merlin – Merlin, of all people – approach, had not been the best choice for watch. He looked up with the smile that always graced his lips whenever the warlock was near, eyes dropping with Merlin’s body as he settled himself next to him. ‘I am by no means opposed to making out right here, right now.’

To satiate his desire, Merlin scattered a trail of kisses along his hairline. ‘I don’t think the others would appreciate it.’

‘Mm, you’re probably right there,’ Gwaine murmured, his fingers tracing Merlin’s face. ‘And you should sleep.’

‘I’m okay.’

Gwaine’s hands found the shadowed purple beneath Merlin’s eyes and he fixed him with a look. ‘I know that you haven’t slept properly for the past two weeks. I can see it written all over your face.’

Scowling, Merlin pushed his hand away. ‘Well that’s rude.’

‘But not a lie.’

Expression softening, Merlin wrapped the blanket tighter around his body.‘That’s because you’ve been on night patrol for the past two weeks and haven’t slept next to me.’

‘I don’t enjoy it.’

‘No, but at least you get to talk to Elyan. I’m left alone with the ceiling and my thoughts, and you know how much I hate that.’ Realising how he sounded, Merlin leaned closer into Gwaine. ‘I’m not trying to guilt-trip you. I know full well there’s nothing you can do about it.’

Just as Merlin knew that, Gwaine knew full well that he shouldn’t do what his arm had already started to do but, noticing Merlin’s poorly-concealed shivers, he set down his sword and drew Merlin in so the warlock was resting his head in Gwaine’s chest. Then, kissing the top of his head, Gwaine pushed him away as swiftly as he’d pulled him in. ‘Go to bed, love. If you fall asleep here then your neck will not be thanking you in the morning.’

Looking up, Merlin held his gaze for several moments. With a sigh, he lifted his head and kissed Gwaine on the mouth before reluctantly standing and stumbling back to the makeshift camp. Gwaine watched as he settled himself at a slight distance from the other knights and Arthur, his back turned. The flickering embers cast subtle shadows across Merlin’s back and Gwaine’s gaze remained turned towards him for several moments more before he forced his eyes to travel away from the warlock’s form. Gwaine didn’t need to see it to know how it moulded to his palms when they were alone.

When around other people, Merlin always seemed to skirt around Gwaine, always leaving at least several inches between their bodies, as if afraid of causing Gwaine to shatter as a mirage if he made even the slightest contact with his skin. Gwaine had started wearing gloves more frequently in the hopes that Merlin would be more liberal in brushing against him then, but it had all been to no avail. Then Gwaine had continued to wear gloves anyway, just so that his bare hands wouldn’t have the nerves numbed by grazing surfaces before they reached out for Merlin’s skin. The result was a warm tingle that, to some, would be more of a scald, but Gwaine savoured every moment that his skin was set alight by Merlin. Having a particular skill with fire spells also helped him not feel the agony of burning so much, too.

When they were alone, though, Merlin was the one to remove Gwaine’s gloves and, every time his fingers skimmed the bones in Gwaine’s hand, the knight had to focus so as not to release skittering flames in Merlin’s direction. There seemed to be a ritual with Merlin when they were alone. The warlock would gently draw the gloves from Gwaine’s skin, toss them to one side, and then dedicate a substantial amount of time to tracing the marks on the knight’s hands, no matter how many times his fingers had already followed the cellular paths that day.

First, he always looked for new scalds or burns, disregarding Gwaine’s protests that they didn’t hurt in the same way that their ancestors had when he had first started learning magic, skimming his fingers over the marks as if the touch formed a mental note to treat them at a later date. After assessing the damage, Merlin’s lips always trailed behind his touch, silently reassuring each of Gwaine’s imperfections that they were so wonderfully loved and successfully sending shivers up Gwaine’s spine. Though those shivers always were abruptly severed when Merlin’s touch made its way to the thick scar just below the fold of skin between his right thumb and forefinger. Merlin had never once pushed him for more information about his childhood amongst bandits, but there was always a part of Gwaine that worried Merlin would one day get sick of the sight of the small branded letter, not quite concealed by the path the knife had taken so long ago, and would abandon him to the abyss he had been lost in before meeting the warlock.

But that hadn’t happened yet.

After studying Gwaine’s hands, Merlin then moved to stripping him of his knighthood and it was a death that Gwaine would gladly watch again and again if it was at Merlin’s hands. The chainmail was cast aside, the cloak thrown over a chair, and the sword noisily skimmed the floor until Gwaine was stood in only a shirt and his trousers, equal to Merlin. The only armour Gwaine had ever wanted covering him, since that day at the tavern, was Merlin’s hands. Arthur hadn’t really given him an opportunity to turn down the knighthood and, even if he had, there was always the possibility – in Gwaine’s mind, at least – that Arthur would have been offended enough to maintain his banishment, and then Gwaine never would have seen Merlin again. Being a knight did have its advantages, though: Gwaine never went hungry, nor did he have to sleep with one eye open, and he had been getting into fewer and fewer brawls over the years. Though that last one was perceived as more of an advantage in Leon’s eyes, who had always been the one to drag him out of any frays and then let him cool off in the cells on the odd occasion. Even when that had happened, though, Merlin had always slipped in and spent the night with Gwaine, heating his body up to unnatural temperatures to keep Gwaine warm. The first few times that had happened, Gwaine had been terrified that Merlin would spontaneously combust, but Merlin had frequently assured him that such a trick was not possible.

So they would stand there, facing one another in silence, Gwaine’s materialistic armour strewn across the room, and then Gwaine would take Merlin gently in his hands, tracing segments of the form he knew so well, and then their souls would fuse together with their lips.

When the stars had shifted substantially, Gwaine hauled himself from his position and shook out his legs in the vain attempt to rid himself of the cramp in his limbs, slowly advancing towards Leon’s form. He gently prodded him awake, instinctively lunging backwards as the reflexive swipe came from the blankets, and held out his arms to receive said blankets when a thickened voice quietly called out his name.

Turning around, Gwaine could just make out Merlin’s hands stretching out in a half-hearted wave in the heavy darkness and, telling Leon to forget about the blankets, picked his way through the sleeping knights, guided by the dropping syllables of his name. By the time he reached Merlin, the warlock’s hands had fallen to the ground and, smiling fondly, Gwaine hastily stripped down to his gambeson and slid into the nest Merlin had made.

There were significantly more blankets than Merlin should have had – not that Gwaine was complaining – and Merlin drowsily pushed several layers towards him, turning around to face Gwaine. His eyes flickered in the darkness as his hand fell against Gwaine’s chest and, from the point where Merlin touched him, the knight could feel a comforting heat pushing into him like a blade. Gwaine realised he probably should have tied back his hair so Merlin didn’t accidentally try to eat it in his sleep, but he was too comfortable to do that. With a smile, Gwaine encircled the warlock with his arms and rested his mouth against Merlin’s forehead as his eyes closed.

‘I missed you.’

‘I missed you, too,’ Merlin murmured.

Gwaine frowned, one eye cracking open. ‘You were asleep. You couldn’t have missed me.’

There was a pause. ‘You know I wasn’t exaggerating when I said I couldn’t sleep properly without you next to me, right?’

‘I did not.’ Gwaine waited until he felt five of Merlin’s exhalations drape themselves around his throat before speaking again. ‘Whatever did you do before I came into your life?’

‘Had a decent night’s sleep, because I wasn’t aware of your existence and consequently didn’t have to constantly worry about preserving it.’ Merlin shifted against him, hands crawling under Gwaine’s shirt and settling themselves on his stomach. ‘It’s so strange to think that we didn’t even know that the other existed. That we had no idea that one day we would be right here, in this moment.’

Merlin, when tired, always became philosophical. And usually when Gwaine was tired he couldn’t make head or tail of what his significant other was saying, but perhaps the cool night air had cleared his head more than ale usually did. ‘I think I prefer it that way,’ Gwaine murmured. ‘If we’d known that the other was out there, then I think we would have spent all our lives searching. We would have pinned our entire existence on the other person and that’s...That just doesn’t feel right. Not that I’m saying I don’t love you.’

‘No, no, I know...I know what you mean,’ yawned Merlin, pushing his head into Gwaine’s chest.

Tightening his arms around Merlin, Gwaine listened to the rhythm of the warlock’s breathing pattern, trying to match his own to it, and gently kissed the top of his head. There was a slight mumble, and something that might have resembled an ‘I love you’ and Gwaine murmured it back, just in case. It had been too long since the two of them had drifted off together, wrapped in one another’s beings, and Gwaine would forever bind himself to the soft form that was quite literally touching his heart.

#so compared to moee recent ones this does seem quite fluffy...#thanks again for the prompt!!!#tbh i'm surprised the knights didn't huddle together for warmth when sleeping more often #it can get fucking cold #merlin #gwaine #merwaine #hug prompts #lit writes #bbc merlin #*more

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dojae-huh · 3 years

Text

It didn’t take long to see that Jaehyun has a crush. Friends don’t look at friends like he does. Friends look attentively, fondly, with humour, etc., but not like the other one hung the Moon. Taeyong confuses many because he looks with longing, which is unusual, well, he is in love, just platonical. To everyone’s luck, imagine the drama otherwise. Taeyong attaches emotionally so strongly, he made a tattoo and a pendant in the image of his dog, plus dedicated a song to her.

Now I’ll try to describe what is noticeable about Doyoung.

Doyoung mainly divides neos into kids and not-really-hyungs. With “children” he is very affectionate, but he puts himself on a higher position (Jeno is his “son”, with Donghyuk it’s “don’t forget I’m 4 years older”, cute Marky). And that’s because he was introduced to Dreamies, when they were kids. He literally babysitted the Korean line. He is a very indulging hyung, but he can draw a line, be firm (at least when it’s about him, like his decision to diet).

Jungwoo is only a year older than Mark and calls himself “a baby”, but Doyoung got to know him as an adult, and so always reminds Woo about his age. Doyoung doesn’t treat Xiaojun as a kid either. WinWin, Jungwoo, Lucas, Shotaro - Doyoung helps them initially, then tries to make them swim on their own. He doesn’t spoil them the way he does Dreamies.

All hyungs are “same age friends” and with them Doyoung can be dismissive, not pay them attention if he is busy or lost in thought.

Doyoung joined A trainees with experience of song competitions, school bands, leading his class, being student body vice-president, etc. Mentally he wasn’t younger, maybe even older than the hyung line. For example, as an artist he had more years of experience, than Taeyong, who never danced or rapped prior to joining SM.

Add to it Doyoung’s security in him being the smartest, outside of dancing and sports, there is nothing to make him feel “lower”/younger and listen to/follow NCT hyungs. As a result, again, Doyoung can draw a line.

Jaehyun was always in the middle, the maknae of the hyung line. Doyoung during debut acknowledged on the radio that Jaehyun is both donsaeng and a friend (being only year younger) to him. “Jaehyun is a donsaeng” dilemma was discussed before, right now I want to draw attention to how Doyoung can never not be affected by Jaehyun. You’ve seen a good example with Do’s vlive and Jae messaging, but it is noticeable in everyday interactions as well. If there are no feelings involved, Doyoung should treat Jaehyun one of the ways he treats others. Actually, Jungwoo is the best for comparison. He was as attention seeking and clingy as Jaehyun was. Doyoung called him his bias (he called Jaehyun his favourite donsaeng back in Rookies days), praised his face, took special care (during Woo’s first flight to US), was with him on programmes, MCed together. Jungwoo even has Mark as his bro. And Do likes to pat him on the butt. Despite constantly being surprised by Jungwoo’s antics, Doyoung still can manage him (at least to some degree). He can’t Jaehyun. (I think I’m a stubborn person, but I can’t beat Jaehyun in stubborness.)

For comparison, Doyoung’s embarassed/shy smile.

Doyoung has a weakness.

#anatomy of Jaedo #Doyoung is my bias

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iknowthekoolaidflavor · 4 years

Text

Tender Curiosity

As the new kindergarten teacher at Little Arbor Elementary, (Y/N) thought it would be easy adjusting to her new environment. Thomas Jefferson is more than willing to help, but there is a driving force dedicated to keep them from being together.

Word Count: 4.8k

Chapter 1 // Next

Tagging: @wreakhavoconmacroissantdiggs @daveeddiggsit

A/N: It’s finally here! I’m so excited for this series.

The first day of school for elementary schoolers will always be a day full of excitement and nerves. That proved true for you as your first day at Little Arbor grew closer.

It was quiet when you walked through the front doors. It was 7:15 am. Teachers were putting up last minute decorations and going over their lesson plans for the day one last time. You were glad that you met Angelica when you did. She spent most of the summer helping dissolve all your anxiety as she helped you finish decorating your classroom.

You smiled and waved at a couple of familiar faces as you made your way to your classroom. As you set your bags down, your anxiety began to seep in.

“Are you ready for the meeting?”, you heard from behind you

Angelica stepped into the neatly decorated classroom with a bright, welcoming smile.

“Yeah. It’s in 10 minutes, right?”

Angelica nodded as she took you in. You were still nervously looking around the classroom, fidgeting with things that weren’t out of place.

“You’re going to be amazing”, she started, “That’s why George knew you were perfect for the job. The children are going to love you”

In the three weeks that you became acquainted with Angelica, it wasn’t until last week that you learned she was the vice principal. During your interview, she was out of town. You were too ecstatic to be hired, you didn’t notice her name in the middle of the documents Washington had given you.

“Thank you”

“It’s not like you haven’t done this before”, she said reassuringly as she placed her hand on your shoulder

You turned to see her bright smile again and your worries began to fade away. It was time to head to the meeting and meet the rest of the faculty.

Before you could make it to the office, you could see two men standing in front of the door. The short one looked furious while the other man looked as if he couldn’t be bothered by him.

“Remind me why Washington hired you again”

“I’m obviously here to replace you Alexander”, the taller man stated, unbothered as he scrolled through his phone, “If you stay out here yelling at me, you’ll miss the meeting”

“That’s Thomas and Alexander. They both teach third grade social studies. They don’t like each other much, but they’re great teachers”, Angelica informed you, “They’re also quite annoying”

You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped your lips, drawing attention to you from a few feet away. Alexander continued his one sided argument with Thomas, but it fell to deaf ears. Thomas had already caught your gaze and refused to look away.

He was tall with a head full of curls that perfectly framed his face. Every curl remained in place. For a third grade teacher, his attire was far more fancier than most teachers you’ve seen around school. Thomas was in a well tailored suit, while Alexander opted for jeans and a polo.

Thomas gave you an easy going smile and you felt your heart beating out of your chest. He was easy on the eyes. The more you stared, the more you realized that you were in trouble. Angelica caught you just as you squeezed your notepad to your chest, refusing to take another step.

“Thomas”, Angelica called with a smirk, “Come meet our newest recruit”

Thomas’s eyes grew wide, knowing he had been caught ogling you in the halls by one of his bosses. He walked over to you and flashed that smile again the moment he was a few feet away from you.

“This is (Y/N)”

“The new kindergarten teacher”, Thomas greeted as he reached for your hand, “It’s nice to finally meet the teacher we’ve heard so much about”

“You’ve heard of me?”

“George and Angie wouldn’t stop talking about you once you were hired. Everyone is excited to meet you. Been a while since someone new was hired”

“Well it’s nice to meet you too. I can’t wait to meet everyone”

Thomas kept his eyes on you until Alexander decided to join the group. You exchanged pleasantries and learned more about him than you expected. For starters, he was competitive beyond compare. He just knew this year he would be voted teacher of the year once again, much to Thomas’s dismay.

“Don’t sound too cocky, Alexander”, you chimed in, “For all you know I could be teacher of year”

Alexander turned to face you, shocked by your statement, “You sound so confident for a newbie”

“How are you so sure you’ll win when you don’t even know your competitors”, you bantered, “This isn’t my first year teaching and I was also named teacher of year two times in a row”

“You’re correct”, he admitted, “I don’t know a thing about you”

“But it seems I already know everything I need to know about you”, you gave him a final glance before stepping away, “Which will make my win so much sweeter”

Alex’s jaw almost dropped as he watched you walk away. Thomas tried but failed to contain his laughter.

“You’re right, Angie”, you heard him say, “I like her already”

Thomas caught up to you, speeding by Angelica just to get the door. You thanked him as you walked by and found a seat in the office. Everyone greeted you with warm smiles. Thomas sat across from you next to a shorter man that you hadn’t been introduced to yet. He looked at Thomas just as Thomas’s gaze found your’s again, then he looked at you. You saw a small smile spread across his face as he shook his head. He elbowed Thomas and finally broke his gaze as he whispered something to him. Thomas put his head down and mumbled something under his breath.

As everyone else took their seats, George started the meeting. He started off with an encouraging speech about making this school year better than the last for the students, parents, and the faculty. There was a short conversation about making sure the parents were staying involved in the students’ academic success and how to reach out to parents. The last thing you remember was the discussion about the PTA meetings when you hear your name.

“...she is new to Little Arbor, but she’s not new to teaching. I know some of you have had the opportunity to be introduced her but let's give a warm welcome as always”

Everyone turned to you smiling.

“I know this is the first day of school for you too, so can you tell everyone a little about yourself?”

The room grew quiet as you thought of something to say.

“My name is (Y/N). I moved here from Georgia and I was a kindergarten teacher at Shady Grove Elementary for four years before I decided to move here”, you stated timidly, “It’s nice to meet all of you”

Amongst the voices asking you about moving to a different state and your experience at Shady Grove, you could hear Alexander’s voice over everyone else’s.

“She’s also been teacher of the year two years in a row. Ask her about and she’ll gladly tell you”, he spouted

“As much as you walk around here bragging about your two awards, it will be nice to hear a fresh voice talk about their successes”, Thomas quickly stated before you could say anything

Pretty soon the room started to unintentionally instigate the situation. There was talk of you dethroning Alexander’s reign as teacher of the year which he was not a fan of. Soon, they started to make bets over who would win, much to George’s amusement. Most of the teachers were voting in your favor.

“Alright. Settle down”, George chimed in with a laugh, “The students will be here in half an hour. Go forth and be wonderful and all that jazz”

On your first day as a teacher, no one ever told you you would spend just as much time consoling the parents as you did the students. You went from reassuring students that their parents would be back to telling the parents that their children would be alright.

Today was no different.

There was a sign placed in front of the classroom door for students to choose how they wanted to be greeted. Most of them chose a high five or made up a handshake with you. It helped ease them into their new environment and it seemed to put the parents at ease to see their children happy.

As the students entered the classroom, they were instructed to place their belongings in their cubbies and sit on their assigned color on the rug. So far, nine of your ten students were present. As you waited, you could hear them asking each other about their favorite colors and wanting to switch seats.

Five minutes later, a little boy with a head full of curls and a Black Panther backpack was standing in front of you, greeting you with a giant smile. You happily returned it, but you couldn’t say the same for his mother. She regarded you with a cold stare.

“Good morning”, you chirped, “You must be Ezra”

“Morning”, he said as he smiled back

“You have a choice in how I greet you. Which option sounds best to you?”

Both Ezra and his mother stared at the selections. He pointed to the circle that said hug. You squat to reach his height, ready to hug him, but his mother had other plans. You saw her yank her son back, eyeing with trepidation.

“Don’t touch my son”, she nearly yelled

“Ma’am, I wasn’t trying to--”

“I don’t care. The nerve of you new age teachers thinking you can just put your hands on other people’s children. Keep your hands off my son”

She turned to Ezra, hand still gripping his shoulder.

“She’s not allowed to hug you. Do you understand me?”

“Yes, mommy”

Ezra looked down as he walked into the room.

“Don’t you ever--”

“I heard you”, you griped, trying to go back to your calm demeanor, “You’ve made your point of view very clear. Pick up is at three o’clock”

You turned on your heel, taking a deep breath before you entered the classroom to get the day started.

The first half of the morning went off without a hitch. It didn’t take long to learn their names because there were only ten of them. So far, you could tell the sing-a-longs were their favorite activity, even if they were still learning the words.

Throughout the day, you noticed Ezra slowly coming out of the shell his mother forced him in. He volunteered to help pass out construction paper and crayons. He hugged Macy until she stopped crying when she was afraid her parents wouldn’t be back. Ezra was a completely different person without his mother present.

Without a doubt, he ended up earning the coveted position of the line leader. As you made your way to the cafeteria, a familiar head of curls turned the corner.

“Good morning, Ms. (Y/L/N)”, Thomas said with a soft smile

“Good morning again Mr. Jefferson”

Thomas’s attention soon turned to your line leader. His smile grew brighter as he greeted the students.

“Ms. (Y/L/N) chose me to be line leader today”, Ezra chirped

“That’s so cool Ez”

Ezra smiled proudly at your colleague.

“If you ask nicely, she’ll let you be line leader too”

“All I have to do is ask?”, Thomas implored now that is attention was on you, “I’ll keep that in mind next time”

“The role of a line leader is earned Mr. Jefferson. Don’t know if you’re deserving of that title yet”, you whispered only loud enough for him to hear

Thomas quirked an eyebrow and took a small step forward. He was dangerously close, but not enough to cause any trouble if someone like your bosses were to walk by.

“Pray tell Ms. (Y/L/N). What would I have to do to earn such an honor bestowed by you?”

“Not distract me in the halls while I take my students to lunch”, you quipped, “They're hungry. Shame on you for making them wait”

To Thomas’s amusement, you gave him a fake glare as you led your students to the cafeteria.

Lunch time will always be your least favorite time of the day. Every kindergarten to second grade class were assigned the same block to eat lunch. Hungry children who have yet to have recess, all in one room never sounds like a good idea to anyone and yet here you all are. The room exploded with exuberant children that you would have to endure for thirty minutes.

Some of your students had lunches packed for them, but also had money to buy snacks. As the rest of the students started to eat their lunches, you took the others to the lunch line. While waiting for your students to get out of line, you saw Thomas at the end of the line with a grim expression on his face. He gave the lunch lady a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes as he greeted her and politely asked for a turkey sandwich. The lunch lady gave him a knowing look, but didn’t press any further. Thomas stared down at the lunch as he reached the front of the line. It wasn’t until he reached for his wallet that he had time to look up to catch you staring.

“It’s not what it looks like”

“It’s exactly what it looks like”, you grinned, “It appears you have an affinity for school lunches”

“The complete opposite actually”, he responded as he tried to hand a five dollar bill to the cashier. He ended up thanking her when she gave him a stern look as she pushed his hand away.

Thomas stepped aside as you guided everyone else back to their assigned table. As you got the rest of your students situated, you had enough time to see Thomas walk to the other side of the table and place the lunch in front of Ezra. Ezra turned to see Thomas squatting in front of him. Ezra’s frown started to change into a smile as he gave him a fist bump.

“You know Ezra?”, you asked as he approached you

All Thomas could do was nod.

“If I’m in the cafeteria and I see that a kid doesn’t have a lunch, I just make sure they eat”, Thomas shrugged, “I know being a parent while working is tough, but it doesn’t make me feel good when the kids aren’t eating”

“I thought I had everyone accounted for--”

“Don’t beat yourself up over it. It’s alright”, Thomas said as he placed a hand on your shoulder, “Speaking of lunch, are you eating?”

“Thank you Patron Saint of School Lunches”, you laughed, “but I like to eat during nap time, when it’s nice and quiet”

“Noted. I wish my students had a nap time”

There was an empty table next to your class that you decided to occupy. Thomas pulled your seat out for you and gently pushed you in. Thomas’s easy going smile returned as you changed the subject. He would lean in whenever you brought up a topic that enticed him and add to the conversation every once in a while. As you went on about the need for teachers to adapt their teaching styles for their students, you could tell he was lost in thought. He elbow rested on the table with his chin resting in his hand. His gaze never left you and there was that soft smile that never left his face.

“Am I boring you?”, you asked

Thomas’s eyes widened.

“Not at all. I could listen to you for hours”

“Wait”, you gawked, “You teach third grade, right?”

“Yes, I do”, he stated proudly, “Best third grade class in the entire school”

“Hamilton would beg to differ”

Thomas smile deflated, “Hamilton’s students have nothing on my class”

“But aren’t all of the third grade students great?”, you asked, “Don’t pit them against each other for a petty rivalry. They deserve better”

“You’re right Ms. (Y/L/N). Where were you all those years before?”

Thomas stared at you as if you would have the answer, but there was something about the way he looked at you that implied another meaning.

“I wanted to ask you where your students were”, you continued

“Oh”, Thomas said, finally breaking him away from his reverie, “They’re at their special. Music class with Maria”

“She seems nice”

“She is. Maria’s great with kids. I think you’ll like her too”, Thomas paused and looked at his watch, “Speaking of which, I’m a little late to pick them up”

“Late on the first day of school”, you gasped, “How can you live with yourself?”

“Well, there’s this new teacher here. She’s beautiful, but I know she’ll be a bad influence on me”, he grinned as he stood up, “I wonder if I can stay away”

Without giving you a chance to respond, Thomas left to pick up his students. You suddenly realized the cafeteria was quieter than before. Most of the classes had already cleaned up and left the cafeteria. Your class was quick to clean up when they realized recess was their next activity.

The rest of the day went by faster than you thought. After recess they took a nap, then there was art with Mr. Laurens. You went to drop them off, but stayed for John’s antics. He was yet another teacher that was amazing with children. One moment they were drawing pictures of their favorite person, the next thing you knew you were assisting with getting markers cleaned off of their hands and arms.

“It could have been worse”, John laughed as he ran his fingers through his hair, “I’ve seen some things”

You couldn’t help but laugh.

“If the parents give you any trouble, they know where to find me”, John winked at you before waving to the children

With the last twenty minutes of the day approaching, you asked all of them what their favorite part of the day was.

“I liked art”, Macy said quietly

“I like art too”, you replied giving her a smile

You watched as her face slowly lit up as other students agreed with her. You had a feeling this class was going to be your favorite.

“I think I like story time”, Nathaniel cheered

“I liked music, but nap time is no fun”, Corey admitted

There was an overwhelming chorus of distaste for nap time. What you would give to be able to take a nap during the day as an adult. They’ll regret neglecting nap time when they get older.

“What was your favorite Ezra?”, Macy asked

Ezra grew quiet, deep in thought, “I really liked lunch time”

“Lunch might have also been my favorite”

With the last ten minutes of the day, you walked them through dismissal. Most of the parents arrived at three o’clock on the dot. Every time you saw a student greet their parents, your heart exploded. The moment they saw their parents, they would break into a sprint and jump in their arms, talking a mile a minute about their day.

There were a few that didn’t want to leave and they had to be reminded that they would in fact be back tomorrow morning. It felt like you were reminding yourself as well. You had a great day getting to know all of them and it pained you a little to watch them leave.

As you walked to the cubbies you realized the Black Panther backpack was still there. Ezra sat on his assigned square with his legs crossed patiently waiting to go home. A small sigh escaped his lips as he looked at the clock that read 3:35.

“It looks like we have some time on our hands”, you smiled as you sat in front of him, “What would you like to do?”

“I get to choose?”

“Of course you can”

“Mommy never lets me choose”, he said as he walked to the bookshelf

Your heart sank. His mother’s first impression had a lasting effect on you. Ezra brought you out of your thoughts when he held a book in your face.

“Chicka Chicka Boom Boom? I love this book”

“Me too”, he chirped, “My daddy reads it to me when I go to his house. Daddy lets me choose stuff all the time”

“He does”, you asked, allowing him to continue

“Yeah. He lets me choose lots of stuff”

“Like what?”

“My shirts, my pants, my shoes”, he started as he ticked the items off with his fingers, “My snacks, my backpack, the books we read, and the songs in the car”

“Your dad sounds awesome”

“He is”, he beamed

You wanted to ask him more about his parents, but decided against it as you opened the book. By the time his mother arrived, Ezra was enthralled by your animated voice. He took his time reading the letters aloud when you encouraged him to keep going. When you gave him a high five, she made her presence known.

“What do you think you’re doing?”, his mother chastised

“Reading a book”, you responded as you made a mental note for where you left off, “We can finish the rest next time”

“There won’t be a next time. I just got held up at work”

“That’s fine. No one’s holding it against you”, you reassured her

You weren’t going to hold it against her, but somehow your calm demeanor upset her more than you knew. She took a step towards you, invading your personal space.

“I don’t want you getting close to my son. I don’t know you”

“Lucky for you. You have the entire school year to get to know me then. I’m sure it’ll be a great learning experience for the both of us”

She glared at you ready to say something else when you heard a cold voice from behind her.

“Is there a problem here?”, Thomas asked from the door

“Of course not”, you responded as you took a step back, “Ezra, did you enjoy your day today?”

Ezra smiled at you, then at Thomas and his mother as he told them about his day.

“Then she read me my favorite book. She even does voices”

“Sounds like you had an exciting day with Ms. (Y/L/N)”

“I did”

You noticed a change in his mother the moment she heard Thomas’s voice. Her frown turned into a smile and she contributed to the conversation as if she wasn’t at your throat a moment ago. She grew incredibly close to Thomas.

“I’m glad you enjoyed your day baby”, she cooed as she wrapped her hand around Thomas’s bicep

Thomas froze, looking between the three of you. His discomfort seemed obvious to everyone, but her.

“Martha”, he warned, “That’s inappropriate and you know it”

Before he could yank his arm away, Martha moved her hand away with a sigh. Ezra waved as he left the classroom in a better mood. You stood in the middle of the classroom, wondering if he would be safe going home with her. Was he eating? Does she yell at him? Does his father live with him? Why is she so sweet on Thomas?

“Earth to (Y/N)”, Thomas called, waving his hand in your face, “I was asking if you were alright. Martha is more than a handful”

Honestly, you’ve never been more frustrated in your life. Usually parents waited until the third or fourth month to show their asses, but this was a new record.

“I take that as a no”, he continued, “Want to get a drink?”

This was the moment he decided to ask you out?

“I mean, some of the teachers and I are going out for a drink. You’re welcome to join us”, Thomas corrected, “First days are always a lot for everyone...even the teachers. Who would have thought teachers work hard too”

“Sure. I have to get my notes together first. You’re cutting into my planning for the night”

“I thought you turned in your lesson plans over the summer?”

“I did, but these are notes I took on the students. I want to adjust the lesson plans based on the things they like and their learning styles. This is just a rough draft because it’s only the first day. I’ll know more after a month or so”

As you looked up from your papers, Thomas was staring at you in awe.

“You’re a wonderful addition to our team. I already like having you here”

“I like being here”

Thomas smiled as he went to collect his things. He wanted to spend as much time as he could to get to know you. After he walked you to your car, he made sure he gave you his number.

“Just so I can send you the address or if you need anything else. Like a tour guide or something”

“A tour guide?”

“DC is an interesting area with a lot of history. I also know some great places if you ever want to get something to eat”

“I might take you up on that offer”

“I sure hope so”, Thomas grinned, finally finding the will to walk away, “I’ll see you in a few”

You sat in your car, trying to keep your feelings at bay, but your body failed you. The smile you’ve been fighting off broke out in the worst way possible. Being around Thomas felt like a breath of fresh air, but you didn’t date colleagues. For personal and professional reasons, since the county strongly discourages dating amongst faculty and staff.

The thoughts about Thomas ran rampant while you pulled out of the parking lot. Amongst the rest of the cars still parked in the parking lot, neither of you noticed Martha’s parked a few spots away. Her eyes were fixated on your retreating car as a frown etched into her features.

If you and Thomas were to continue on like this, then the both of you would be made aware of how far Martha Jefferson would go to make your lives a living hell.

#thomas x reader #thomas jefferson x reader #elementary teacher au #elementary au #thomas jefferson

139 notes · View notes

staywritten · 4 years

Text

Over&Over│Seo Changbin

Over&Over│ Chapter Ⅰ

Synopsis: Loving Changbin was either than breathing, but why was it so hard to accept that he can love you just as you love him. Why do you always questions your own self worth. What were you supposed to do when he went on an arranged marriage meeting?

Genre: Non idol au, fluff, angst, hurt comfort, smut

Word Count: 2k

This is dedicated to @soobinssmile you sweet sweet bean ❤️❤️❤️

You yawned rolling out of bed, following the wonderful smell from the kitchen. You leaned on the doorway, smiling seeing your boyfriend working on breakfast. He wasn’t much of a morning person, especially since he usually had work pretty early, and yet here he was. You wrapped your arms around his waist, resting your head on his back. “Mmmm smells good Baby”

“You’re up early~” he whined, he gave your hand a comforting squeeze. “I was trying to surprise you”

“Well I woke up and you weren’t there” you pouted. “I missed you and my bed was too cold without you”

He turned around in your arms, giving your forehead a kiss. “My Baby is so needy” he chuckled, lifting you up effortlessly and placing you on the counter. “I’ll shower you with lots of attention after breakfast so I don’t burn anything,” he laughed.

“Deal” you beamed smiling at him.

You could say you were still in the honeymoon phase of your relationship, but it's been that way for well over two years. No relationship was perfect, but you and Changbin were pretty close. It was the healthiest relationship you’d ever been in. You felt so loved, and you were so in love. You supported one another. He trusted you.

“How was work?” he moved the eggs in the pan glancing over to you.

“Long and boring” you laughed, stretching your achy bones. Twelve hours on your feet at the bar was never a good time, but busy nights paid the bills. “You were asleep when I got home. How’d the meetings go?”

“Long and boring” he mimicked your response, a cheeky smile on his face. He’d been busy ever since he took over his parents company as vice president, he never had any complaints, he loved his parents and was surprisingly very good at business management, and being VP took off some of the stress since his sister was appointed president. She ruled with an iron fist so he just needed to back her up.

But because of his busy schedule you hadn’t had a lot of alone time with him lately.

“Stop looking at me like that” he smirked, not looking away from the food. His biceps flexed as he moved the frying pan. He could practically feel you gazing at him.

You crossed your legs and bit down on your lower lip. Your eyes darkening, taking him in. His sweatpants low on his hips, his tank top showing off his muscular arms, his bed head still mused from last night.

He took in a sharp breath catching how you squeezed your thighs together in his peripheral. “Behave Baby” his voice warning.

“Make me” you smirked, your fingertips dancing down your thigh, playfully dragging the hem of your t-shirt upwards.

He turned off the heat and gave you a stern look. “You’re always challenging me”

“Only when I don’t get enough attention” you grinned, wrapping your arms around him and pulling him into you. He placed his hands on your plush thighs, giving it a little squeeze before pushing upwards and massaging your skin.

“I was trying to be a gentleman” he whispered huskily against the shell of your ear, his fingers looping under the waistband of your panties, tugging you against him.

You laughed and played with the hair on his nape. “I don’t recall asking you to be” you groaned as he bit your lip taking you into a kiss before dropping to his knees. He pulled your panties down your thighs roughly while kneading at your breast through your t-shirt. Hooking your thigh over his shoulder, his tongue dove in. You gasped, raking your hand through his dark hair. Your body shivering and goose bumping from his touch. It wasn’t just the way his tongue teased your clit it was how he touched you. How he gripped your thighs with absolute purpose. Changbin was always so gentle with you, he was the sweetest and kindest boyfriend but when he took you. That gentleness was long forgotten.

He looked up at you, wiping the slick from his mouth. That cocky, shit eating grin gracing his lips. He lifted you in his arms almost too easily before carrying you over to the couch and tossing you down.

“Couldn’t make it to the bedroom?” you bit your lip watching him strip out of his shirt.

“I’m gonna fuck you on every surface from here to the bedroom” he lifted your t-shirt over your head. He grabbed the back of your head, bunching your hair in his fist. “You’re the one who started it”

“I did” you were practically beaming as he guided your mouth to the bulge in his sweats.

“You gonna help me out Baby?” he cooed letting you lick him through the sweatpants. He watched as you pulled down his boxers and took him into your mouth. Your head bobbing along his length as your pace quickened. His low guttural groan was music to your ears. He grabbed your freehand stopping you from rubbing the circles on your clit. “No Baby, that’s mine. I’ll take care of you later” he helped move your head a little faster. His breaths getting sharper as you became needier. He slammed your head a little harder, fucking your mouth. “Good girl” he rubbed his thumb across your cheek lovingly as he came harder. You watching his every move as you swallowed.

He sat down on the couch, pulling you on to his lap roughly. “C’mere” he whispered against your lips. You chased his kiss, whining as he pulled away and bucking your hips harder. “Binnie….” you moaned running your nose against his, your arms wrapping around his neck. “Fuck...please”

“Mmm beg some more Baby” he gripped your hips, grinding your dripping core against him. “Tell me what you want” he bit down on your earlobe snapping his hips playfully against yours.

Pulling back you gazed into his eyes, spreading yourself. “I wanna feel you inside me...please”

And hearing your sweet voice beg him, seeing the want on your face, your lips bruised from the kisses, cheeks warm from his teasing. You just looked so fuckable. “That’s my girl…” he lifted you up, pumping his cock before guiding it in you, letting you sink down nice and slowly. Your arched your chest against him, gripping his shoulders to steady you as he filled you inch by inch.

Despite being together for so long you never stopped being amazed at just how much he stretched you out. Your eyes practically rolling back at his size. “Binnie…” you panted softly as he started to move his hips. Slow teasing, rhythmic thrusts became rough snaps in no time. His eyes watching how you lost control for him, how your breast bounced with him. The way your voice strained to say his name. The way you’d desperately grab his fingers when you were close.

How you were his everything.

Perhaps he was a little too distracted with how comfortable he was that morning. He lost himself in you, and his post sex cuddling and almost forgot that he had a meeting scheduled. It took absolutely everything in him to sum up the energy to leave your arms. “Baby~” he whined as he gave you a kiss goodbye and you continued to pepper kisses on his lips. “I gotta go, Noona is gonna kill me if I’m late”

“Fine” you pout, pulling away. He frowned seeing your pout and giving you another kiss.

“I love you, I’ll see you later tonight” he grinned, taking in your form one last time before he left.

“Love you more~” your voice bliss-ed out and tired as the door finally shut behind him. He smiled to himself hearing your sleepy voice. He loved your habit of saying love you more. In the beginning of your relationship he would argue about it, but he learned it was just your way of showing affection. It brought comfort to you, and that in itself brought comfort to him.

Changbin hadn’t even been at work for a whole hour before his sister pissed him off. Normally he never even fought with her, they were the perfect duo to run the company and he’d usually comply with her ridiculous request but he was drawing the line here. “Noona! No, I’m not doing it” He huffed crossing his arms and shooting his sister a glare.

She rolled her eyes and sighed. “Binnie please don’t throw a temper tantrum, consider this part of your work responsibilities. It’s this Saturday and it’s rude to cancel. She is an heiress” she flipped through the morning paperwork.

“You’re asking me to cheat on my girlfriend”

“Relax, I’m asking you to go to an arranged marriage meeting. Just go, be polite, and tell her no.” She skimmed the paperwork making notes. “She’s the only daughter of our biggest investor all her parents want is for you to meet her” She set down her folder. “You have to be cordial and not make bad blood between business partners.”

“Then why do I have to go if it’s cool if I just reject her”

“Turns out she has a little crush and just really wants to meet you, something about you being nice to her at a banquet a while ago. She’s the one who requested the meeting” she gave him a smile. “Binnie, I know you love your girlfriend, and honestly I like her a lot. You guys are really cute.” she leaned her head on her hand. “Just be honest and tell her you have to do it for work, and there’s nothing to worry about.”

She got up, her heels clicking as she walked to the door. “I’m doing this so Mom and Dad don’t get involved. They seem to think you’re settling because you don’t meet other suitors, I’m running damage control to show to them that you are not settling and you’re happy with your girlfriend, while meeting with requests”

“Noona I don’t want to hurt my girlfriend...I love her”

“I know Binnie but you also have a job to do. And if you don’t tell her it seems like you’re hiding something so just be honest”

Changbin spent the whole day agonizing about it. Telling you seemed a lot easier than done. It wasn’t that you were ever open about your insecurities but he could tell. He could tell that his wealth bothered you. It wasn’t that you loved him for his money, you loved him despite it. You’d always been so independent and a hard worker you never expected his big lavish gifts, you loved his acts of kindness more.

And although you never said it, he could tell you were intimated by the money, the company, he’d catch little moments of your insecurity that you tried to hide with a smile.

“Binnie?” you waved your hand in front of him bringing his attention back to you. “I said I talked to my mom. She's looking forward to us coming to visit them this Saturday? They missed you” you smiled at him before taking a spoonful of soup in your mouth.

“Oh Saturday...I have a meeting that morning, I’m sorry”

“Oh no worries, next time then” you glanced at him from your glass and frowned. Ever since he got home from work he’s had this furrow in his brows. Like he was thinking too hard, not to say that it never happened he was usually just a lot more vocal on things that bothered him. It wasn’t like him to deal with stress in silence. “Baby, did you have a bad day at work? Is that why you’re working this weekend?”

“Something like that… My sister arranged a meeting Saturday morning and I can’t get out of it.”

“It’s ok, it can’t be helped if it’s for work right?”

“Right” he gave you a half smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes before squeezing your hand. “I love you”

You laughed at how serious it felt. “I know Binnie, I love you more” But there was just something about his expression that didn’t sit well with you. Lately it almost felt like a proposal was coming at any moment. There was just this sparkle and warmth to him that he radiated. And here it was a lovely evening between the two of you in a nice restaurant with a gorgeous view, and you just knew that thing on his mind wasn’t a proposal.

He took a deep breath and glanced up at you calling your name gently, almost too timidly.

“Binnie isn’t this soup delicious, good job picking this place it’s so perfect” the words spilled out faster than you could react. There was just something so forlorn about his tone, your anxiety spiked. It almost felt like he was going to break up with you so you interrupted him, distracted him with the dinner and hiding behind the biggest smile you could muster.

He smiled and nodded, taking a bite of the soup. “It’s perfect”

The truth was, he didn’t want you to worry for nothing. Telling you about an arranged marriage meeting, when he had all intents of rejecting her seemed like it was going to make you worry and anxious. He didn’t want you to doubt him, and he didn’t want you to have to suffer.

He was going to deal with this on his own.

There was no need to worry you.

After dinner the two of you returned to your apartment. Neither of you address the awkward tension that just lingered in the air. Your own insecurities eating at both of you, and neither of you willing to be the one to acknowledge the mood.

You rolled onto your side, watching as he read over emails on his phone. His smile tugged as he glanced at you. “Yes Baby?” you cuddled closer to him, letting your head rest on his chest.

“I love you more…” you whispered before pressing a kiss to his neck. It had to be your imagination. There was nothing wrong, you loved him and he still loved you and that was all that mattered.

You could tell by the way he touched you that he still loved you.

To Be Continued

» Next►

Hey Friends! I was planning a 3 part mini series for Binnie if you guys like it and wanna see more let me know~ I’m also still working on a part 2 to my last Felix scenario ;)

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elle-imagines · 4 years

Note

Hello there! Can I get a hc about the mlqc guys and their first times (not with MC but in general. How old they were, if they were nervous, etc. Can be fluff and/or nsfw)

Mr Love: Queen’s Choice First Times

~1800 words

NSFW Below!

Kiro

Kiro lost his virginity to his partner since highschool, during the beginning of his stardom (maybe 19 or 20). Like him, it was fun, awkward, and something he can look back on and smile at. It was at his newly bought apartment, celebrating alone with video games and high-calorie snacks.

He was very excited, and this enthusiasm made up for his nervousness. Like everything around Kiro, he manages to make it warm, inviting, and somehow hilarious. Kiro didn’t hesitate to do something they asked, whether kissing or touching them where they wanted.

His performance anxiety definitely pervaded the bedroom, so there was constant questions of “Did that hurt” or “Am I doing good?” throughout the night. A few times his partner had to tell him to slow down, since overzealousness isn’t exactly pleasurable. Although he was nervous about how well he could do, he was a fast learner and knew to continue doing what they liked if they showed a reaction towards it.

A few mishaps here and there, an elbow digging to hard on someone’s back, hitting his head on the headboard, and missing the mark when it was time to put it in. Of course, he laughed off his embarrassment which made the atmosphere more carefree.

Unsurprisingly, he has great stamina (and virility). Even though it was his first time, he wanted to try different positions that was obviously out of both of their ranges. On the table, on the floor, standing, him under them, vice versa. Kiro is apparently well-read in sex-related lore, and was impatient to try some things that looked like it felt good. I’m sure his partner had to persuade him not to bring food in once (or twice).

With his stamina and great dexterity, he didn’t have trouble finding a pace and keeping it without growing tired. He definitely had them bent out shape, and it’ll only get better the more time it goes on. Besides that, his passion and urge to pleasure them and be receptive to pleasure it what made the night fun. Kiro’s always been an open-minded and go-with-the-flow kind of person, which relates well to easing anyone’s nerves and making something nerve-wracking fun.

Victor

• Victor was the oldest out of the boys when he lost his virginity, around 23 years old. He focused on his education and being productive, not really caring for other aspects of his life until he tried dating for a short while. The person he was dating at time was someone he knew for a long time, and more than likely met through an internship or shared class.

He wasn’t the first to bring up sex; they were. This is not to say it wasn’t on his mind. Victor’s mind always had a penchant for preparing for different avenues and possibilites, including in his personal life. He’s aware of the typical progression of relationships inclues some component of intimacy, but he felt it would be courteous to allow them to bring it up first. The two definitely engaged in foreplay and physical intimacy, allowing him to build a comfort for it.

Definitely the type of boyfriend to have a sit-down over dinner and talk abou protection and other protocols. At least he made it smoother by cooking dinner for them at his apartment. Victor is adamant about maintaining his partner’s comfort and discussing options for birth control.

A night when things began to heat up, he was very prepared for it. Way more than the average person. Silk sheets, plenty of condoms and lube hidden in his nightstand, and even flavored types in case they wanted to give him oral. Linen towels waited under the bed, and so did a change of sheets. Victor felt the more he prepared for difficulty, the less frantic he’d be on the inside.

Ever since he was a young, he had a great control of delayed gratification. He could wait for dessert his parents would double the amount. A bit of composure and restraint at an exciting business venture that could go wrong.Allowing you to orgasm once, maybe twice if he’s lucky, before he even thinks to release. He always had the power to control his nervousness, so it wouldn’t be detectable except for a minute frown or a second of hesitation. He lasted long his first time because of it, and he made sure they came before he did.

Although he was shy and apprehensive since this was a new experience, he forced himself to initiate and lead them. If they were nervous as well, he’s notice and stop immediately and hold them for a few moments. Victor wanted to ensure that they were safe with him, and his competitive streak wanted their experience with him to be one of the best.

Very receptive to their reactions. He’s a businessman, and always had a knack for nonverbal body language. The moment he hears a positive sound, he will exploit it even more.

Can definitely get a bit rough in the end with how hard he thrusted in to them, but still maintained the self-control to not hurt them.

Gavin

Gavin’s sexual experience is something he doesn’t really attempt to remember. It was with someone he was friends with, more of a respite than a slow experience, and the two felt their relationship wasn’t the same. Gavin was focused on finding you (MC) for years, and his endearment towards you didn’t stop even when he sought brief intimacy with someone else. He felt it was a weak moment, but knows that he shouldn’t let his first time mar the rest of what was to come in his love life. A bad experience is not a testament to the future.

The tryst happened at his apartment. An accumulation of frustration, a bad day, and many unanswered emotions brought Gavin and his friend together. A large part of him didn’t care, he wanted an escape from what is expected of him. For once, he wanted to have a day of insignificance and no greater questions. They barely made it to the bed because everything from him released the moment he shut his apartment door.

Foreplay was passionate, rough, and fast. He felt bruising against his skin and nails digging into his back. The brief shots of pain helped distract him from his distracting thoughts. He grew hard quickly, and felt ready to relieve himself of it, among other things. Gavin had to lucidity to prepare them and confirm if this was okay, which was replied to hastily. He, of course, was a bit clumsy and out of frustration his friend urged him to go ahead and do it.

Once he penetrated, he didn’t hesitate to go fast because he didn’t want this moment to last long. The shorter it is the less time he has to question if this was actually healthy. He wasn’t able to get an angle that was pleasurable for him, but at their pleasure he kept going. Since it was his first time, he came prematurely. Feeling guilty, he pleasured them again and listened to what they liked in order to get them to orgasm.

Briefly, they stayed up and talked to each other about the difficulties they were facing in their lives. Gavin felt that the talk they shared had the vulnerability and intimacy he actually craved, rather than the sex. When they parted ways he didn’t see much of them again until there was no contact complete.

He took the encounter for what it was, and learned that he desires a partner who can know him and trust him fully. He tells himself that he will find that in the future, eventually.

Like Victor, Lucien was dedicated to his studies and didn’t prioritize relationships like the average person his age. However, he gave himself the chance to date and decided to pursue something with a barista he’s grown to know at his favorite cafe. Out of everyone, he was the oldest at 24 to lose his virginity, but he did it with such class and composure you’d think he lost it awhile ago.

A researcher, he naturally questions the way things are. He rejected the labels that surround sex and relationships in general, and made it clear to his partner that he wanted their relationship and its pacing to move on their terms, not society’s. When he felt ready to have sex, he indirectly made his desire known, but he didn’t want to push his partner at all.

When it came time to actually have sex, he was nervous, in a way that came from a fear of failing them. However, throughout he his his nervousness like he hides everything. He wanted to be calm so that they could be calm. He hid it so well that when he revealed that he is only going on theory, his partner was surprised because Lucien is doing very well. He developed his lover’s comfort by lighting candles, taking a shower together, and then just talking to each other about anything for a long time. It relaxed the both of them before they were ready.

Very adept at taking what he learned, judging if it was viable or not, then utilizing it. He skipped over what he read on “dirty talk” and decided to focus on ministrations and erogenous zones that can trigger a stronger orgasm in them. Lucien is very patient and felt that foreplay was the most enjoyable part because of the diversity it allowed. Oral, massaging, mutual masturbation, he was eager to try what he read to the point his lover was ready for the next stage.

At times he would be very silent and become detached even, since it helped him get away from his overactive mind. He isn’t loud in bed at all, but he showed how quickly he was unwinding by the force of his grip on their hips or how hard he slams into them.

Lucien got his hands on some information on edging, and would push himself to the edge from pulling out. While working down from his impending orgasm he’d pleasure his partner during it. This happened a few times and allowed him to draw out sex longer than what would’ve been for someone’s first time.

He’d definitely allow a few jokes and laughs here and there, wanting this moment to be gentle and without any gravity or what-ifs. Lucien wanted to explore a new aspect of intimacy with his partner, and did not make it more nor less than that.

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innuendostudios · 4 years

Text

Thoughts on The Witness

[no spoilers... this game would be nearly impossible to spoil in text]

Where do I even start?

I guess one thing to know about The Witness is that you can watch the famous 9-minute tracking shot from Nostalghia - where Oleg Yankovsky tries to walk a candle from one end of a drained pool to the other without extinguishing it - in its entirety. (I think it’s the entirety, I left before the clip was over; yeah, Jon, I get it.)

How do we interpret this? I haven’t watched Nostalghia, but I know that scene. Every film major knows that scene. Tony Zhou cited it in discussing lateral tracking shots, how they emphasize environment and create emotional distance from humans in the frame, and how Tarkovsky uses this to make the sequence lonely and arduous. Kyle Kallgren cited it in discussing how YouTube makes critique of certain types of art difficult, and Content ID essentially decides for us what film as a medium is even for.

Jon Blow plays the clip in full with no commentary - or, rather, the game itself is the commentary. There’s a sequence in Indie Game: The Movie where Jon Blow expresses some pain about how his game Braid was received, how he felt no one who played it ever really understood everything he was trying to say with it. That feeling might be ameliorated if he weren’t such a constituionally obtuse motherfucker.

Perhaps the scene is meant to draw parallels between Yankovsky’s dedication to a task that is simple yet difficult and the game’s puzzles, built, as they are, around complexity-through-simplicity. Except, Yankovsky’s Andrei has a personal investment carrying this candle, one Tarkovsky has spent the entire film setting up. I was about five hours into The Witness when I found this clip - more than twice the duration of Nostalghia - and I still didn’t know why I was solving the game’s puzzles or what they were trying to communicate.

Perhaps the scene is meant to draw parallels between the patience it encourages in its audience and the calm, meditative mode all The Witness’ allusions to Buddhism are seemingly on about, to give yourself over to the time investment the game demands of you. Except, Nostalghia asks you to spend nine minutes thinking about one thing; zen Buddhism encourages you to think of nothing; The Witness asks you to spend between fifteen and forty hours thinking about a zillion things. It is not a game about clearing your mind, it’s about filling your mind up. There is little continuity between the thoughtless peace of meditation or Yankovsky’s emotional collapse and the game’s intended “aha” moments.

But the ambiguity, the contextlessness of the scene’s inclusion, means you can’t be sure whether it’s contradictory. If we assume it’s about dedication, and we find a flaw in that worldview, maybe the problem is that we didn’t assume it was about meditation. And vice versa. If it fails to communicate, maybe the problem is us.

The only thing this scene communicates for sure is that Jon Blow wants me to know he watches Tarkovsky.

Jon Blow wants you to trust he knows what he’s doing. That the game is saying something. He also never, ever wants to tell you what it is. (If he could just tell you, he wouldn’t have spent eight years making it into a game, I suppose.) But this operates on completely opposite rules to the puzzles. Puzzles in The Witness are maze-drawing panels with increasing numbers of rules, all conveying their rules nonverbally, through gameplay. You see a symbol you don’t recognize, or a shape you don’t know how to draw, and you try things out, you make assumptions, you fail repeatedly, and then something works, the panel lights up, and you know you got it right. Now you understand what the symbol means.

The theming doesn’t work that way. Whatever theory you have as to what the game’s about, there will be no moment of clarification. Blow has an incredible talent, in fact, for constructing imagery that is hilariously blunt yet still ambiguous. As with Braid, where he crammed a straightforward narrative about memory and regret with allusions to quantum physics and the atomic bomb, The Witness references Einstein, the Buddha, Richard Feynman, romantic poetry, tech culture, game design, and - most of all - itself.

I realize I’m dancing around the subject here, because what the gameplay is (or isn’t) in service of is far easier to talk about than the gameplay itself. The Witness is a big island full of touch screens where you draw lines on grids. That’s it. The island is dense with structures and biomes, impossibly having a desert, a swamp, and three different kinds of forest which appear to be in four different seasons. What it doesn’t have is any reason why you’re there or a justification for solving ~600 line-drawing puzzles other than because Jon Blow wants you to. I was wrong in my video from 2015 to call The Witness narrative-based; the game contains narrative but it is not a narrative game. The island is very pretty, meticulously crafted, and not trying in the slightest to look like a real place. It is Myst minus everything people like about Myst.

Absent a reason for my character - if I’m even playing a “character” - to solve the puzzles, why am I, the player, solving them? The short answer is, “Because they’re there. You knew what you were buying. You solve the puzzles because it’s a puzzle game, do I gotta draw you a diagram?” (No, you need me to draw 600 diagrams.) That is unsatisfactory because the island is clearly more than an elaborate menu system.

Do I solve them because they’re interesting? I mean, they’re not bad, if you’re into Sudoku or, like... cereal boxes. In and of themselves, they’re not my cuppa. People told me about a repeated sense of epiphany the game provoked for them, but that’s not the way I experienced it. Every puzzle is so carefully tutorialized that I never felt I was making an intuitive leap. There is no lateral thinking in The Witness, it is strictly longitudinal. You get a row of puzzle panels, and you take them one by one (you are, in fact, prevented from jumping ahead), each one building on what it taught you. And they get hard, certainly, but each is the logical progression of the one before. And each is a marvel of nonverbal communication, but that’s more Jon being clever than it is me. This is not to judge people who did get a feeling of discovery; one person’s “aha” moment is another’s “yeah, Jon, I get it.”

(Aside: I did get a proper “aha” moment when I came to a panel that could be solved two ways. It controlled a moving platform; draw one line, the platform moves right, draw the other and it moves left. And I thought, “Huh, I guess I get it, but those shapes seem kind of arbitrary.” But then, while it was moving, I realized the platform itself mirrored what I had drawn; the two designs were what shape the platform would take when connected with each endpoint! And I went “oh fuck, oh fuck, that’s clever, that‘s really clever.” My first epiphany. It was the most Myst-like the game got, it was clearly not the kind of experience Jon Blow was interested in recreating much, and it took place 7 hours in.)

Do I solve them because I’m compelled? In the first play sessions, I asked myself several times, “Do I even like this?” The game is often tedious and frustrating and I regularly muttered “fuck off, Jon.” But I kept playing. I got annoyed when people interrupted me. I got a hideous case of Tetris effect. They’re not the kind of puzzles you can spend the day thinking through, like you would with Myst or Riven; they’re too abstract to visualize without them right in front of you. And the world is pretty but it’s not a place I wish I could visit, like I would with, again, Myst or Riven. But I kept going back. I solved puzzles less because I found pleasure in finishing them than I found displeasure in them being unfinished. Jon Blow has given talks on how game design focused on being “addictive” is basically evil - his word, not mine. And yet... it felt more like I was playing his game because I was hooked than because I was enjoying myself.

Do I solve them because I trust Jon Blow? Because I believe this will all amount to something? Jon certainly expects me to trust him. The game blares PROFUNDITY AHEAD constantly. (I remind you it quotes the Buddha.) But, in the years since Braid, I have grown less impressed with Jon Blow’s “art game genius” shtick. One fun bit about playing The Witness so late is finally reading all the discourse, and, well before finishing the game, I had read the thoughts of Andrew Plotkin, and Liz Ryerson, and Andi McClure - all of whom are brilliant - so I had a pretty good idea of what I was getting into. What’s surprised me is, having gotten to the first ending - not the secret ending - what the game is up to still isn’t clear. There are enough allusions to heady ideas that you can infer some stuff, but the default ending - while pretty enough - adds nothing and reveals nothing. And getting the True Ending means completing the In the Hall of the Mountain King section, something many will never find and precious few will ever complete. (Debating whether I’m going to even try.) If Jon Blow wants you to trust that he’s going somewhere with this, he makes you wait a long time before finding out if it’s worth it. [EDIT: turns out the secret ending comes after a different set of obscure puzzles than Hall of the Mountain King.]

Which leads me back to my original conclusion: I am solving the puzzles because Jon Blow told me to.

I suspect the arc Jon wants is for me to begin solving puzzles because I want to know what they’re in service of, what point Jon is trying to make, and then spend so long on them that I forget about the destination and just wrap myself up in the work, and, after dozens of hours on the hardest of the hard puzzles, Jon will finally reveal that the point he was making was about the labor I have just done. That he couldn’t tell me what it was for until I’d already done it. That the labor was its own reward. And how much you like The Witness is going to depend on whether or not you feel ripped off.

The overall impression The Witness left me with was less of meditation than discipline. (I have joked that playing The Witness feels like being in a D/s relationship with Jon Blow and not knowing the safe word.) Jon presents a simple concept and then expects you to solve every. single. permutation. of that concept. You do the work to find out what it’s about, and then what it’s about is the work. That game is about itself. The subject of The Witness is solving The Witness. It’s about purity of design, about simplicity, about slowly mastering a set of skills. (That these skills are neither inherently pleasurable to perform nor applicable in any other context seems not to matter; the point is, you learned them.) It’s hard not to read a game fixated on the beauty of its own design as all kinds of smug.

I allowed myself to be spoiled on the True Ending, and it seems, in the eleventh hour, if you draw lines til your fingers bleed, the game makes room for self-critique, questioning whether all this dedication to design actually is, in any way, meaningful or useful to us. Which, just a little bit, smacks of an artist spending two years making a sculpture of himself, chiseled to make him look a perfect Olympian beauty, only to label it “EGOISM.” Ooo. Make you think.

I suspect, in the end, I played it to (partial) completion because I was curious. I didn’t necessarily buy Jon Blow’s hype, but his hype is intriguing. As a portrait of a certain mindset, a monomaniacal obsession with design for design’s sake, the folk-religion of salvation through technology, and the critique of same, it is fascinating. I know people - smart people - who genuinely love this game, and, if the above is any indication, I clearly love talking about it. I have no regrets.

But, word of advice: if you don’t a) love the puzzles, or b) love the discourse, just walk away. Everything will be fine.

#capsule review #Adventure Games #the witness

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let-it-show · 4 years

Text

Make You Feel Pretty Too

So this is the companion piece to “Oh So Pretty” and it ended up going differently than I planned. I thought it may be more angsty, but is more of an exploration of how Elsa views Anna, her thoughts on her sister’s opinion of herself, and wishing she had the confidence to express herself the way she wants to with Anna. It uses the same scene, but I wrote this one in first person. It’s not too angsty/deep, but hopefully conveys her anxiety/insecurity the way I wanted.

I made such a mess of everything.

But everyone took me back and allowed me to apologize and explain. Even if they weren't completely swayed, a few voices shouted out that my powers could protect us all and more than make up for what I've done.

So, I'm not a monster maybe, but I'm a weapon. It's a small condolence. Of the two I would rather be the latter even if I enjoy neither. I want to be queen, just Queen of Arendelle and do what my duties entail. I want to look after my people and I want to spend time with my sister and have a nice life where I don't need to hide.

I'll be a weapon if that's what they want.

Far more important to me right now is what Anna wants. She saved me in every way someone can be saved. I kept her away so long and now I want ony to dedicate my life to her, to this person that saw so much in me that she never left.

I think-I think I did well today.

I paced about in my room after getting up as soon as there was light. I've always been one to get up early in the morning. Getting ready for the day never takes me much time. With concentration it is easy for me to produce clothing of ice, if I want to. Sometimes I put on normal clothing underneath just because I want to and cover that with an ice dress. Oh, the clothing I own is all fine, made by the most skilled seamstresses the kingdom has to offer. It's not that I don't like it. But I can do things with my magic those clothes cannot. I like to wear my cold, glimmering dresses even if it does draw attention....

My clothing isn't the point here.

In the morning I prepare myself quickly, but I know Anna sleeps in. I thought I had waited long enough and went to see her. I knocked. It's strange for me to knock. I do not know how well she would react to me just coming in though, especially if she were in a state of undress.

She let me in. She was not ready. At all.

I don't mind that, but I thought she may ask me to leave. Thinking about it now, that was a ridiculous notion. If anything, Anna is difficult to get rid of. Ah, even thinking that makes me feel cross with myself. I don't want to do that.

Her room was a huge mess. I couldn't stop looking at it at first! I don't care that it was messy, so much, though I may ask later if she'd like help neatening up. I could see her books, her clothes, her perfume bottles, even some toys - Anna's things. Seeing them is really nice. I'm happy she didn't let isolation take over her spirit the way I did. I may ask her if I can borrow some things, in fact - little things, just to add to my room and make me think of her. I really like seeing her things all around me.

She looked to be having trouble with her hair, so I asked if I could help. I'm not sure what I expected! I was scared for her to say no, scared for her to say yes...

Her response was to tell me: “Um sure. If you want I mean I-you can go eat if you want I don’t want to keep you-uhh whatever you wanna do!”

Oh Anna! I laughed. I laughed! She makes me smile so much, just as much if not more than so many years ago. I love that girl. I don't laugh like that usually. I have to admit, it made things less tense and I got to brush her hair.

I don't know when I last touched her hair, really touched it. My fingertips may have felt it during our embraces, but...it's different to feel her hair and her spirit in my hands that way. Her hair is soft and beautiful. It's vibrant. I would have liked to set the brush aside and stay for hours just using my fingers through her strands. Is that how sisters are? Is that normal? I don't think either of us knows, but that's what I wanted to do. If only I could have found the courage to place a kiss on top of her dear head at least when her eyes closed...

Maybe, maybe it is too soon. I didn't do that. I brushed her hair from her face, her face that always feels like it has sunbeams dancing across her freckles. I didn't know what else to do with my hands when finished, so I set them on her shoulders. She had been so unsure before I brushed her hair so I squeezed her and brought my hands down her arms. I would have liked to hug her. She likes to hug and likes to touch I've noticed, so it probably would have been okay, but...

...but what? I don't know. I'm scared.

At the time I did let my emotions overtake me for a moment, she looked perfect and so I called her such. I think she thinks I was congratulating myself on being able to brush her hair. I'm okay with her thinking that. I let myself touch her ends. Once again, my common sense ducked out and I asked if I could braid her hair.

I didn't have time to be scared about it, though Anna did make me nervous with her first reaction. I thought I might be tossed out and then she revealed that she thought I was...too beautiful or too above her somehow to braid her hair. She asked if I'd seen myself and I'm-I'm still in shock.

My skin is so light. There's no good color to it unless I'm embarrassed. I suppose my particular shade of hair is pretty, but it's light again. I'm too thin. I like my hips and I like my chest, my legs are okay too, but staying in isolation and away from any of the sun - the one in the sky or the one in my hands - it's given me a strange and sickly image. I'm a somewhat attractive weapon. How could she find me beautiful and not herself? My beauty is in my ice, but she doesn't need powers.

Anna's very soul is gorgeous with all she has given, her spirit, all the light she shines on those around her. What is mine? I don't really know yet. I do know I could never be as pretty as her, and I wanted to say as much.

“Your hair is beautiful." At least I said something, even if my face felt so warm. "Have you never been told how the sun looks behind it, when it’s lit up and radiant? Has no one ever mentioned the way it cascades over your shoulders?” I made her blush, and it was cute.

I needed to focus, and I did so on gathering her hair when I noticed so much red on her neck from a burn. I don't like seeing injury on her, of any kind, but we are not where we can lecture each other - I think. I did lecture her at my coronation, so perhaps I'm wrong. I told her of her burn, iced it lightly, and informed her that I love her freckles. Who wouldn't?

“You-you like my freckles?” she asked me. She was quiet, maybe she didn't believe me.

I began to feel sad, she was surprised by these compliments. Who would compliment her though, with so little social contact? It was then I remembered that ice harvester she's been rather sweet on. I don't know what to think of him myself - seems to have a good heart. He did help her when I piled snow and ice on the kingdom. From what I hear she was kind of demanding, too. That's just like her...I bit back a smile then, but I'm smiling now.

Still, if he was going to court her, I wasn't okay with someone who won't shower her with kindness. “Of course, Anna, I’ve called you beautiful before, I wasn’t just saying it." I couldn't help myself. "Have you not been told that? What is it that Kristoff says to you?”

Ah, he called her cute. I can feel myself rolling my eyes as I remember that, because she deserves better than that.

I told her she's beautiful, and that he needs to tell her she's beautiful. It was like someone else was talking through me as I told her that-that I would tell her she was beautiful as many times as she needed. I still don't know how I got that courage. I suppose looking at her I felt that same overwhelming affection I felt at the coronation. I felt my love for her barrel through me and seize my nerves in a vice, telling them 'NOT TODAY!' so that I could give her my honest thoughts.

She tried to turn it around on me, tried to tell me I am too. That courage stayed. “This isn’t about me. You’re so very pretty, Anna, there’s not a bit of you I don’t find gorgeous." As soon as I said that, I couldn't believe I had. How did that come out of my mouth? How did I not choke on my words?

I thought maybe I was too bold, that it was too much, and Anna might feel awkward. Every part of me started to launch into a flight response, despite how much work I had done on my own anxieties since the thaw. The last thing I could handle was sounding stupid to her, to make her feel uncomfortable.

She hugged me. She turned right around and she hugged me and she thanked me and I hugged her back. I tried to keep touching her hair, but even now I want to laugh at myself. She stood there saying how good I looked and then she hugged me, it's obvious she wasn't about to push me away, so I hugged her tightly. I wrapped her as tightly as I could. There is no warmth like Anna's warmth against me...I listened to her breathing, I focused on her heartbeat, I absorbed as much as I could, because what if we are torn apart again? What if I were to lose Anna?

I can't think about that.

I don't know when we released each other. I kept her in my arms as long as I could, kept my hands on her as long as I could. I think I may have touched her face and she smiled at me with a radiance I only find in her precious eyes.

Anna.

I hope we have more mornings like that, many many more. I hope I will always do right by her. Maybe I don't know how to be her sister and best friend yet, but I think, yes, I can learn. I'll do my best to make things wonderful for her. We won't be separated again.

I can't and won't lose her.

#Frozen #ficlet #elsa #anna #emotional elsa lol #can be seen as sisters #can be seen as elsanna

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mysleepdeprivedass · 4 years

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Another ML fanfiction idea

And here we go for another prompt fic idea that I got while reading a fanfiction on AO3. I want to write this idea but I’m too lazy for writing a whole fanfiction.

And just want to keep in my head but it was driving me crazy sooo let's go.

Btw I inspired by the fanfiction MDR by Yilena (on AO3) (@xiueryn on tumblr) (also I haven’t finish the fanfiction yet but I need to let go the idea of my head)

(let's go for translate everything a wrote again T^T and I just saw how long a wrote, the translation it's gonna be looong x.X also idk some term are correctly translate sorry if it's not)

Also warning, i’m going to talk briefly about eating disorder, bullying and suicide so skip the part in italic if the idea or the word can triggered you.

Have a nice reading on my 2.am writing idea. \0/

AU steamer / youtuber Marinette

Marinette begging steaming around her fifteen, and she become quickly know for her skills for some game

Marinette have now like 19 yrs old, almost 20.

She plays a lot of different games.

At first (when she was 15 ) she wasn't doing face cam steaming. After a years and a half, she start face cam but disguise. Her disguise is, a clothes always in polka dots red and black, and she have a mask which hide almost all her face and she wear a red wig (she have different wig, pixie cut, big curly, straits, ect,... But they're all red)

On twitch she is know as Ladybug, and she have a YouTube channel where she post all her rediffusion of her twitch live.

Marinette have a big community verry supportive and nice. She's the kinda of girl that going to play with her fan during live if she met them on the game.

She doing some explained and tip live on game that she's really good at or that she's love.

Her favorite game are Ultimate Mecha Strike saga. And a new independent MMORPG game call " The Tale of Miraculous" a kinda fantasy/fantastic game, that's become more and more difficult when your reach a levels.

Also it's a no-miraculous idea

At first, when she started live’s, qhe was doing a lot, like every night she was doing a live which ended around 4 or 5am. But after a big meltdown on live (she was around 17 years olds) she make a calender, which sometine change depending on he mood.

Monday Night : Games of her choice, most of the time she play at TTOM (The Tale Of Miraculous) or fighting games. From 8 p.m. to 1 a.m. or 2 a.m.

Wednesday Night : if she started a let’s play, she is doing the let’s plays, if she not she’s doing two or three games, most of the time horror games or strategy games. From 8p.m to midnight or 1 a.m.

Calender most of the time :

Friday Night : chill night, she talk or debates with viewers while playing at Minecraft or she opening fan mail or for some occasion she is cooking. From 8p.m to random but between 3 a.m. and 5 a.m.

Sunday Night : Let’s plays or games selected by the community. From 8p.m to Midnight.

Marinette has become very hermits and go out just a few time. She works at her parents bakery and has her own shop (known as Ladybug) her community know that she makes homemade clothes and she has a lot of customers from her community but also from famous people.

Every other week she doing a live between 9 p.m. and 12 a.m. in addition, where she plays indie games or flash games or during fashion week (or any fashion show) she like to do reviews about it and commentary.

Marinette finished school at home because of harassment, she had ended up making several suicide attempts, and had a severe eating disorder and was anorexic

She suffered bullying very early, already in elementary school, and it got worse in middle school where the physical attack was violent. She got kicks, push down the stair, she got a lot a fractures, spit on, etc,..

After a big lynching after school, she try to kill herself, she got hospitalized and her parents finnaly knew about what she suffered. After that she become homeschooled.

A lot of cosplayers ask for commisions.

Chloé had started insults her in primary school but had stop everything before middle school except that others took over, like Lila.

Chloe apologized to Marinette after her suicide attempt. Even though Marinette and Chloe are not best friends, the two get along. Chloé always feels it's her fault that things got there

During her convalescence it’s when that she became Ladybug but was not in face cam.

She started streaming after being released from the hospital

She had a general ES bac (it’s a degree in french school, if you want i can explain french school in a other post... because I’m french ._.) and she studied fashion by correspondence.

For the 3 years anniversary of her twitch channel, she explain her firt years as the stramers, he past, and explain that twitch literaly save her live.

She self-harm for a long time (betwenn 11 and 16 years old)

She still have drugs and antidepressant, and she is follow by a doctor for her eating disorder.

During her depression, she developed agoraphobia, she doesn’t go to convention where she’s invited because of that, also because she wants to avoid overloading Tikki.

Fu is her psychologist.

Tikki is her service dog because she have anxiety attacks and panic attacks and she can hurt them during those.

Tikki is a Labrador, viewers sometine see her during live (try to climb on Marinette lap’s) or hear her bark (very rare but can alway happen)

Marinette loved roasted the clothing collections and clothing choices in video games. She also loves talking about RuPaul Drag Race.

She’s openly bisexual and gender fluid,

She lives in a small apartment not far from her parents to be able to stream quietly.(And without disturb her parents)

Viewers know other room of her apartment. She stream on green screen, but when she live and do open fan mail she is in front of a wall with drawings and gifts from fans that she received. They also know her kitchen but she rarely on the kitchen.

She don’t do much live on the Kitchen but she doing some videos edited on cook video for explain some bases and some recepis. It is to teach the beginner how to cook or the person who is on a tight budget.

Her first cooking live become a meme. She fall several times, managed to stick an egg to the ceiling (god know how), set fire to heroven, and spilled milk and flour all over her floor.

In her live chill, call “let's talk little, let's talk well” in her playlist of rebroadcast on her youtube channel, she brings people on discord to give their opinion on the subject or their experience. She has with subjects from religion, the LGBTQ community, mental illness, to motor disease, to lighter subjects like which animal people find the cutest or whether or not she should go and throw eggs at her neighbor that she hates or she talks about the series or TV show she watches.

Marinette only go out, for work, appointment or hang out with Luka, Juleka and Rose, all are her childhood best friends.And all know that’s she is Ladybug.

Marinette is known for screaming when she plays horror games and there's quite a lot of compilation of her falling off her chair or screaming, often accompanied by Tikki who jumps on her knees think of a panic attack and suddenly she falls off her chair because of Tikki.

*scene*

Marinette after a litlle jump scar :

“ son of bi-” * Tikki jump on her laps*

Luka is also a stramer mostly music related, but he some night doing game stream. He also have a youtube channel dedicate to music. He is call The Viperion Silencio.

“what the fu- !” *fall off her chair with Tikki on her, Tikki laying on her*

Luka and Marinette dated for a year and a half before realizing that they were better as friends that as couple. Their get along even better after they break.

Hours :

Tuesday night: 8:30 p.m. to midnight, play video games

Friday evening: 8:30 p.m. to 1 a.m., review and play with Marinette at Minecraft

On twitch he sing or do some music reviews that viewers recommend. And if not play

He always showed his faces.

On youtube he does covers, original songs, has critical videos. All the videos are directed by him and edited by Juleka, him or Rose.

He also have odd jobs

Saturday: 8 p.m. to 2:30 a.m., sing, some reviews and a the end he play video games

Nino, Alya and Adrien, are TTOM players, and Adrien is a huge Ladybug fan along with Alya.

He has always been close to Marinette and helped a lot especially for her eating disorder. It helps her eat and regain a healthy relationship with her body and food.

Nino and Alya hang out in each other's apartment in turn

Nino is not a big fan of Ladybug but likes to watch her lives sometine.

Nino and Alya live close to each other and are dating

On the other hand, he's a huge fan of what Luka does.

Nino meets Adrien on a dating site, he made a account for joking (before he dated Alya) and the two got really well, and they started exchange discord, and phone number, playing together, and they already saw each other.

Sometine, Alya and Nino go to Paris and sometime Adrien go to Bordeaux.

Nino and Aly live in Bordeaux.

Alya joined them and the three are very close and have already met in Paris.

Nino, Alya and Adrien are 20 years old, soon 21.

Inside joke between Adrien and Nino, on the fact that Nino “cheats” on Alya with Adrien or vice versa.

Too many “bro” between Adrien and Nino, and too many bro joke

Like, I imagined, Alya hant out at Nino place, the three playing at TTOM.

Nino die

Adrien it’s like “Noo bro, you’re my whole world bro, you can’t live me broo”

Nino is like “ Broo I hace to leave, Bro my end is close, I love you soo much broo, live my life broo”

And Alya his laying on her stomach on Nino bed, head buried in Nino sheets and she growls and insults both them and call them "drama queen"

Alya is a huge sore loser and a salty loser.

In the evening and especially when he is tired Nino is a big game trollers.

Alya is a Ladybug Twitch Admins, she was one of the first on Marinette's channel and she quickly was in her Discord. She chats a lot with her on Discord. And she helps Marinette to make special videos where there is real editing. Other admins do it too.

Adrien, Nino meets Marinette thanks to TTOM because Marinette has created a beginner party where no one knows her, she becomes friends with Nino (whom she quickly destroy) and TIN TIN TIN group chat between the 4 (with Alya in it).

Kim is Nino's childhood friend and he started playing TTOM to spent time with his bro, and ended up in group chat (with Alix because he drag her in the game too), he's not good at games and and just a cannonball but he like let off frustration by beat out the hell of the enemy

Baby step by baby step, the group chat add more people

He live with Alix in Toulouse, their roomate.

Alix plays a bit at TTOM but plays a lot of flash and horror games.

Ivan and Mylène have 22 years old and are a couple, they don't know Ladybug much, but they've already received a lot of donation from her for their environmental association and Marinette has advertised for them for free

Alix likes Ladybug but she is not her favorite streamer.she understand Marinette's struggle on her eating disorder because she had eating disorder since she was a child, Kim helps her a lot with it

Nathaniel lives in Auvergne with Marc, the two work together on comics but Nathalie also works as a freelance illustrator and he has already made the banner and stickers for steamers and youtubers, including Marinette.

Ivan and Mylène do vlogs and have a site and an environmental association that Marinette really appreciates.

Max is a little streamer well known to be one of Marinette's best rivals, especially on Ultimate Mecha Strike 3.

He also does video thumbnails and cover video illustrations for a lot of youtubers including Luka.

Nathaniel started chatting with Marinette because of this (Marinette commissioned him for her website, and her channels) and the two became very good friends.

He lives in Strasbourg and works in engineering stuff.

He does very little live but has a very loyal audience because he's a goddamn god on some games.

And some compilation of their best roasted and sassy moment are on youtube.

The two fight each year for the prize of UMS3

The two like to throw shades at each other when they playing together.. Very big sassy and roasted moment.

* A bit like RuPaul's Reading season 5 between Alaska and Alyssa Edward * (Yeah i’m kinda in some fever of RPDR right now)

Like :

There is a roasted meme running in their respective communities, because Max had been champion for two years when Marinette arrived and took that cup from him.

“Hey Bug In ! Here Ladybug, I'm with our dear friend The Gamer, undefeated champion of UMS3 oh whait -

They talk on discord

Okay I finish to translate everything, and shame on my I finish juste by copy paste from google translate.

* gasp then clap * bravo, it was a good one, Miss [insert thing that Marinette lost or meme of her]

And their conversation is basically shades and meme.

Bruh I wrote a lot :o

I don’t know if I’m going to do some update on it. Give me your opinion on it ! Also you can take some idea just tag me and let’s me see what you have do ^^ !

Good Night

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rayveos · 4 years

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Why ‘Guilty Crown’ Remains To Be My Favorite Anime

HELL YES THIS POST IS DEDICATED TO GUILTY CROWN.

And before you tell me how many flaws this anime have and how unsatisfying the ending was, I want to remind you that this is an appreciation post for this underrated anime. No hate comment could change my mind since I’ve watched it back on 2016.

Shall we go back to the main point now?

PLOT. Alright. Like any other animes, Guilty Crown had its flaws too. However, I’m sure you can’t deny that a character who started as a coward (in the beginning of the anime itself) obtaning a ‘Power of Kings’ is something. And it’s not your usual power that you can match on other abilities of our favorite hollywood heroes and comics champions. His power is basically drawing people’s hearts out and materializing them into voids which can be useful weapons and necessities. And these voids reflect its owners’ fears, personality, and character.

***VOIDS. It’s like, “what will your heart look like if it was an object?” Personally, I’m in love with Inori’s beautiful Singer’s Sword while the explanation behind Shu’s always breaks me. They didn’t specifically elaborate why Inori’s is a sword but let’s remind ourselves that Inori was originally created as a vessel to contain Mana’s mind. So, I guess the Singer’s Sword is also an animation of Mana’s heart too.

What I find interesting about the Singer’s Sword is that it contains strong abilities such as being a protective barrier for its carrier and as the sharpest longsword. I can’t help but always fangirl on the first episode wherein the sword is too powerful that it could create a huge flash of light up to the skies. There’s also one in the fourth episode wherein it can destroy anything it will touch onto, regardless of the direction of its attack.

ANIMATION. I’m not that of an expert, technically speaking. You may hate or bash this anime you want but dude, it’s one of the prettiest animations you could ever see. I don’t know if it’s just me but the waves coming from anyone who possesses the power of the Void Genome and Inori when she’s singing are like the black transparent tapes on cassettes. The colors are wonderfully chosen too as they’re not flashy or painful to watch.

If I’m going to choose my favorite episodes that contain the best animations of it, I would choose the first, second, fourth, nineteenth, and the last episode. The place where there is like a flower garden, the one where Shu and Inori spends their alone time after taking leadership of the school, is also gorgeous. The glow on that scene emphasizes how genuine their love is and how beautifully flawed Shu’s character behind his fierce leadership (of course, Hare).

CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. Sure, there are characters that go back and forth from being good to bad and vice versa. It may be uncomfortable to some but as for me, I think it’s pretty realistic in some aspects. Yes, this is supposed-to-be an anime. Nevertheless, it doesn’t invalidate the creators’ desire to put more reality in it. Sometimes, I think the other viewers are reacting the way they did on Akame ga Kill.

In wars, just like how the setting of the Guilty Crown is post-apocalyptic and on the verge of having another one, casualties are quite understandable. Student Council President Kohouin also had her change of heart when she fell in love with Gai and when she ended up envying the studentry’s support to Shu after he proposed an action plan. It’s natural that an elite daughter of the family who has been the center of attention for a long time to turn to the bad side when the spotlight was taken from her. Ayase’s moving on moment is also a strike. She didn’t succumb to her guilt and sadness for losing Gai. Instead, she asked help from Shu to prove to herself that she is indeed useful.

The best character development award goes to Shu, obviously. When he was a kid, he’s this jolly person who encourages others to be courageous and brave. After the tragedy the Lost Christmas inflicted, there’s no doubt that it will traumatize him and became this isolated person we get introduced on the first episode. Living in the shadows like that for years, there’s a tendency that they get well-attached to the first person who gave them attention and faith, hence his growing affection to Inori.

The naivety on Shu’s side during Gai’s planning of operation is on point too. That would be the first reaction of ignorant people who believes that everything should be solved with peace and diplomacy. Again, on their time, it was chaotic and there are abusive officials that plan on bringing the next apocalypse. The way he stood up for the Funeral Parlor members after Gai died fell on the right place too. He was influenced by Gai and I’m sure that after everything what happened and after remembering his past, he won’t let others get harassed or hurt too.

Hare’s death remains to be the biggest turning point for me. Given her strong belief to Shu’s kindness, she’s like a symbolism of Shu’s good side, the part that kept Shu’s inner struggles in check. When she died and Shu declared to become king, I clapped until the episode ends. The subsequent display of his flaws as a human is wonderful. His wrath, the cold treatment, the way he controlled the school and its students. I’m not saying they are nice things. BUT they kept his development moving. It’s not about embracing the bad side but accepting it as a part of you. It’s an ugliness that even Inori recognized as beautiful because in the end, the world has both its beauty and flaws, like a human being.

MUSIC. I will fight anyone who tells me that this anime’s soundtrack is not good. All of the songs they used in the anime are in my playlists! My personal favorite is Bios and Departure Blessings though. I remember I have a friend who has a similar voice to Inori’s voice actress. We became friends because we’re both in love with Guilty Crown. She would sing Departure Blessings a lot when we walk together.

ENDING. As much as I’d like for Shu to die with Inori, the ending didn’t disappoint me or anything. Actually, when I read its summary and explanation, it made sense. It was an unexpected sacrifice from Inori as she have always preferred to be together with Shu. Even so, we have to admit that they are the most unfortunate pair. Inori is human-made vessel for someone else. Someone who is supposed to be emotionless and everlastingly obedient. Meanwhile, Shu is the Adam that Mana appointed even he was still on their mother’s womb. He was already destined to yield the power of the king. I think the reason why Gai is furious when Shu took the power on the first episode is not because he wants it to be his. He’s only making sure that Shu won’t suffer the fate he is destined to have due to Mana’s mind deterioration back then— which is to be the next Adam and bring forth the next generation and its evolution.

That is why them being the couple in the center of all chaos, taking back all the virus’ traces and giving back the voids he used, made perfectly sense. The song ‘Release my soul’ is also a tribute to their love story. Since Inori is not really supposed to exist via natural means, I understand how she chose to allow Shu to continue living instead of dying with her. Shu is still young, after all. He has a future waiting for him, one that Inori can’t possibly have naturally because in the first place, she is not human. You do remember that part when she went berserk, right?

As for the blindness, it came from Inori who was on that time was consumed by Mana. Mana being affected by Inori’s interference on the final battle, the physical body they share was greatly infected by the virus that it caused blindness. When Shu decided to take everything on his hands to end it once and for all, he also took Inori’s blindness as a part of sacrificing themselves. It’s Inori’s last minute sacrifice that mattered. The red threads which are symbolism of destiny/fate are also the same object that tangled Shu’s and Inori’s fates forever. By taking this, Shu also took Inori’s soul before it can also be destroyed along with her physical body. The blindness is simply a reminder that Inori was there. It was Inori’s blindness. It’s a bittersweet ending. The body no longer exists but her soul remains with the one she loves. Together, in the inner mind and consciousness, they are on each other’s arms.

Credits to the owners of these photos. I do not own anything except for this long appreciation post.

#guiltycrown #oumashu #guilty crown #inori #anime #appreciation post #dedication #underrated #fangirling #gai #ayase #funeral parlor #analyzing #voids #power of kings #animation #arts

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ineffablecolors · 5 years

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The Wife [18/?]

The Wife || Ch 18 ~ 5.1k || Ch1 Ch2 Ch3 Ch4 Ch5 Ch6 Ch7 Ch8 Ch9 Ch10Ch11 C12 Ch13 Ch14Ch15 Ch16 Ch17 || FF.NET&AO3

Summary: No one knows all that Emma has been through and certainly no one knows all that Killian has been through and being husband and wife doesn’t make them any less unknown to each other. And really, how can you help someone heal when you don’t even know how hurt they are?

A/N: Bit of everyone in this one :)) Also - should this be E-rated now? Have I turned my slow burn period piece into feelsy porn?!

For all intents and purposes, Ruby grew up in the Jones household. She baked her first pie in this kitchen, she learnt to read along with lady Alice even though she was quite a bit older, she took the first book she ever read from cover to cover from Captain Jones’s library and apologized through tears when he found her reading it only to be told it was hers now, she became a woman in this house on a hot summer morning, she had her first kiss under one of the apple trees, she snuck out the first girl she ever made love to in the middle of the night only for her to get lost and wake up the whole household upon her return.

Granny made her do all the washing for a month for that last one but Captain Jones just send Peter to help Dorothy find her way back to town and never said anything about it.

After her grandmother, there’s nothing and no one in this world Ruby loves more than Alice and Killian Jones.

Thus, she finds it hard to describe the feeling that passes through her when the captain brings his small staff together and tells them that they will need to make some small changes around the house – it is as if her stomach swoops down and rolls in on itself and Ruby feels herself wobble a little on her feet. Granny is impossibly still beside her. It is the first time she has seen the grin that she thought permanent drop from Peter’s face.

And it doesn’t matter that she is still young enough to marry and it doesn’t matter that she can certainly find work elsewhere. This isn’t work, this is her home. And in that moment, Ruby realizes that between her grandmother taking care of her after her mother ran away and Killian taking her in as soon as she could run around after Granny, she has never before been truly afraid.

“I hope you know that…” Captain Jones clears his throat and she feels every word like a nail being hammered into her heart. “I consider this your home as much as mine. So I have done everything necessary to ensure its safety.”

The air that leaves her lungs is so audible and so close to a stifled sob that Granny glares at her from the corner of her eyes but Ruby doesn’t care.

“That being said…”

Killian glances at his wife and Ruby almost feels guilty for having completely forgotten about Emma. Despite everything, despite how much she likes the new mistress, in that moment, Ruby realizes that she still doesn’t see her as an integral and irreplaceable part of the family, as someone who will stay no matter what.

It takes seconds – Killian’s look and Emma’s assuring nod and the way his shoulders straighten and the way she steps closer – for Ruby to realize that Captain Jones most certainly feels very differently.

She is glad for it.

“There is a number of things to be done and I will be coming and going frequently in the following weeks. Meanwhile, Emma is going to take care of the household expenses and I hope you will all assist her where you can.”

He gives Granny a look but the old woman just huffs and dusts off her hands as if she is done with the whole thing.

“Long as nobody messes with my cooking.”

*****

Emma does mess with her cooking. There is scarcely a thing that she doesn’t mess with and Mrs Lucas has always considered herself a prudent and productive woman but that was before she encountered the single-mindedness of Mrs Jones.

She would grumble about it more, if she wasn’t so damn impressed with the girl.

Granny never would’ve thought a woman could be so excited about cutting expenses and yet, here they are. She supposes it has more to do with actually getting to do something, to be helpful and in control. She doesn’t think Emma Jones has been made to feel like that often in her life. The fact that she obviously cares very little for the quality of table cloths, the oils for her hair or the salts for her baths probably makes the whole thing much easier as well and yet, Granny can’t help but appreciate Emma’s tenacity and dedication – the fact that, against all logic and circumstance, she seems happier than ever and Killian – more relaxed than Granny can remember him.

She appreciates how he lingers at the table at breakfast and doesn’t linger in his office late into the night, how Emma’s appetite has grown exponentially since she first dined at their table and her cheeks are a little more rounded and not quite so pale anymore.

Still, Granny acts sufficiently put upon when Emma does away with small costs that Killian would’ve probably never bothered with and sighs in genuine relief when the captain concludes his own affairs for the day and manages to redirect his wife’s attention with a speed that gives the cook whiplash.

It’s none of Mrs Lucas’s business what the masters do behind closed doors but it is her business to prepare their chambers and Emma’s hasn’t been used in weeks.

And still, despite all that, despite her growing admiration for the girl and her pleasure in seeing her happy and believing that she has a voice and a right to things, there is still a murmur at the back of Granny’s head. A little niggling whisper of worry that is both amazed and terrified by how much the captain obviously trusts his wife, how much power he has given her – over his home and over himself.

She sees it in the way he looks at Emma before deciding on his schedule for the day, the way he asks for her opinion when arranging for the dealers that come to look at pieces in the house, the way he lets her into his study – going through numerous pots of tea while he explains how shares and companies work, the way he tries to go to bed at a reasonable hour because she always stays up with him.

She sees the way he considers how everything he does and says might affect her, the way he seeks her approval, if not her permission. It is much more than the piqued interest of months ago, much more even than the obvious care and attraction of weeks before.

And – much as she has grown to trust and believe in Emma Jones – it worries her.

Mrs Lucas has been a widow a long while but not long enough to forget the bittersweetness of being married to a kind and loving man who still managed to almost bring them to ruin. She can remember loving and trusting before she learnt that the latter is not always so easy to earn as the former. You can love someone despite all their faults, you can even love their vices, but kissing someone under the dead of night and walking hand in hand with them through life is not quite the same.

So she worries.

She worries until the night she opens a door, a silver tray under her elbow, coming to collect the cups Emma took earlier, and sees them before the fire. Emma is leaning against the plush settee behind her, awake and alert, her eyes flying over the piece of paper in her hand that she is obviously trying to decipher, but it’s Killian that the old woman can’t take her eyes off of. A Killian Jones that she has never known. He is on his back, his head in his wife’s lap, her fingers in his hair, a paper still in his right hand even though it’s lying limply beside him, and his left arm resting across his chest, rising and falling with his every breath. Almost ten years and she has never seen him without the wooden hand at the end of his left arm, not since it was fashioned by his physician and brought to the house while he was still bed-ridden.

Granny shifts her weight, the glasses on her tray tinkle, and she sees Emma’s hand move on instinct, leaving his hair to settle protectively over his chest, as her eyes fly to the door.

“Oh,” she sighs and her shoulders relax again. “Is it quite late?”

It takes Granny a few seconds to swallow the lump in her throat.

“I’m about to turn in for the night, if you don’t need anything.”

“Yes, of course.”

She should still collect the cups on the floor beside them but it seems inconceivable to her to move further into the room, to break into the space that is almost simmering with their intimacy.

So instead she nods and turns on her heel. She probably shouldn’t look back, she has never felt more like an intruder in her life, but she is glad she does all the same – she is glad for the way Emma leans over, brushing his hair back and kissing his forehead, the way her whisper carries.

“The floor is not an appropriate place for sleeping, my heart.”

*****

Admiral and Mrs Jones return from their trip and Elsa asks Emma over for tea. She even invites Mrs Nolan – Mrs Nolan who she would truly love to meet before she is too far along in her pregnancy to leave her home. It is a good scheme but not quite so good that Emma doesn’t see right through it. Elsa is to draw her out of the house so Liam can ambush Killian and convince him to take his money.

Killian laughs long and hard when she uses the inkwells and paperweights on his desk to explain this battle strategy to him. He does not disagree but he is also absolutely adamant that she should go, see her friends and take some time for herself. Overall he acts like she has been toiling in the fields for the last few weeks. She rolls her eyes heavenward but the pressure from all sides is too much.

That’s how she finds herself watching with undisguised amusement as Elsa gushes over Mary Margaret’s rather pregnant state and Mary Margaret praises Elsa’s home and china enthusiastically and profusely. Knowing Elsa Jones, it probably shouldn’t but it still shocks Emma when she shoots straight for the heart of the matter as soon as the tea has been poured.

“Liam won’t have any success, would he?”

Emma just shakes her head.

“Success with what?” Mary looks between them in confusion as she takes a dainty sip from her cup.

“Oh, Killian has gotten himself into a bit of a bind and he won’t let Liam get him out of it.”

Emma purses her lips and tries to tempter down her annoyance at the regal and yet somewhat blasé way Elsa points things out and distributes information as if she is a flower girl in the last hour of daylight, rushing to rid herself of her merchandise.

“Oh, Emma. I’m so sorry,” Mary Margaret sets her cup down and her hands flutter in the air for a moment before one of them settles on Emma’s knee.

This time she can’t help but roll her eyes toward the ceiling.

“It’s quite alright. We have most of everything settled and no, I do not think Admiral Jones will be successful in his endeavour but,” she spreads her hands, indication her very presence. “As you can see, he was given a fair chance.”

Elsa’s lips twitch in amusement at Emma’s bluntness before she shakes her head.

“It must be a first for Liam to read someone better than me,” she says, obviously not quite believing it herself and smiles at Emma’s questioning frown. “Oh, I told him he would do well to have you around – no one wants a man’s difficulties resolved faster than his own wife. But Liam claimed that he will have trouble enough with Killian and didn’t need you backing him up, which you undoubtedly would, no matter his decision.”

Emma feels her cheeks heat up but for the life of her she cannot tell if she is embarrassed or pleased by Admiral Jones’s assessment. The moment passes as she runs Elsa’s words through her mind again.

“You mean to say, you would urge Liam to do otherwise?”

“I mean to say that I have,” Elsa responds calmly. “Age and other pleasures have mostly tempered his desires for it but Liam used to speculate wildly. And not always successfully. Killian and Captain Nemo have gotten him out of more than one mess.”

She blinks in surprise, Admiral Jones has always seemed like such a stable and practical man to her. Then again, there is also a certain overconfidence about him that she can easily see leading to such pitfalls.

Still, Emma restrains herself from saying that, while she respects his desire to return the favour now, Killian’s troubles have a much different source and she is not in the least angry or ashamed that he should want to fix everything himself. They’ve decided that the less it is known about the whole situation, the better, and while Emma trusts Elsa’s love and commitment to the Jones name – even when they don’t see eye to eye on all things marital – she cannot say that she has full confidence in Mrs Nolan’s ability to keep much to herself. Speaking of—

“Mary, how is Mr Nolan?”

Mary Margaret is only too happy to talk about David’s excitement over their growing family and almost as happy to question Elsa on all things Italian – from food and architecture to how suitable she thinks the climate for young children. Emma thinks herself well and truly safe from being the center of attention when she starts noticing the sly glances Mary Margaret is throwing her way and the calculating look in her eyes as she looks between her and Elsa.

“Emma, dear, you haven’t written me in so long, I’m eager to hear about any new… developments in your married life. Other than that unfortunate business in recent days.”

Emma frowns hard in confusion before the direction of her friend’s inquiry suddenly becomes clear to her and her eyes grow painfully wide.

“Mary Margaret!”

She stares at the other woman in disbelief for a few seconds, consciously resisting the urge to put her hand over the lovebite on her shoulder that she knows is well-hidden by her sleeve. Then she glances at Elsa. The sparkle in the older Mrs Jones’s eye is one Emma has only seen when she looks at Liam and thinks nobody is looking at her.

“Oh, splendid! I wasn’t quite certain how open Emma might be to such a discussion—“

“I’m not—“

Mary Margaret’s eager nod cuts her right off.

“It’s just— you hear such stories from some women, I want to make sure—“

“But, of course! My friend Mrs Seaborne has just the lousiest luck in the bedroom.”

Emma looks between the two of them in bewilderment and just shakes her head mutely.

“You’re new to married life, Emma,” Elsa says in that same tone that makes her opinions sound like law. “I should have invited my sister. After she has done talking no one worries about divulging too much.”

“You mean to tell me you discuss what goes on… in your bedchambers over tea?”

Elsa and Mary Margaret share a look and, in that moment, she can swear they seem to have known each other for years. They look back at her and nod at the same time.

Emma slums back in her seat and blinks. Admittedly, she has never been invited to any tea parties but, despite her jesting with Killian, she never thought they included discussions of one’s marital happiness. Let alone, that particular kind of happiness.

“Why, I— I’m not sure I feel comfortable with this,” she admits honestly.

Mary Margaret waves her off.

“You needn’t share everything, Emma. I… well, I’ve never done this myself but I know many ladies who— that is, I want to know you are being treated well and—“

Elsa is nodding along and Emma shoots her an almost accusatory look.

“You doubt Killian treats me well?”

“Oh, I’m sure he is the perfect gentleman but I have no notion of anything beyond his table manners and reluctant ball dancing.”

“There is nothing wrong with wishing to be well-satisfied,” Mary adds with a properness that doesn’t match her words in the least.

Emma flounders for a minute, trying to make her decision. She is slightly mortified to find herself too proud of her newfound joy to refuse to acknowledge it.

“Well, then… if you must know, I’m quite— I’m very pleased with everything.”

Mary Margaret’s smile gradually dissolves into confusion.

“Whatever do you mean by “everything”?”

“You know there are a couple of different ways,” Elsa says with the authority of one who has had such discussions before and engaged in those “different ways”.

“Well, yes, there are different ways and different things,” Emma supplies before she can think better of it.

And now both women are looking at her with wide eyes.

“Oh, you know, it’s not all—” she helplessly waves her hand before her and feels her face burning.

“I think she means touching,” Elsa almost whispers to Mary Margaret without either taking their eyes off Emma – their look is very much the one you give a foreign object from a different continent. “Do you mean touching, dear?”

“Well, yes, but also…” Emma sputters and looks all around and finally drops her face in her hands and groans.

It is in that moment that one of Elsa’s maids knocks on the door and brings in some more refreshments and every part of Emma thinks she is going to use that as an excuse to get away from this conversation. So she has no clue where on earth the part that speaks when the door closes again comes from.

“You know you can be kissed… everywhere.”

“Of course, but— oh!”

For the first time Elsa’s face contorts obviously without her permission and the shock freezes her eyebrow high on her forehead. Emma blinks.

“Have you never—“

“Once or twice but—“

She is about to ask what Elsa means by that – once or twice every month or every week? She doubts it can mean every day – true, Admiral Jones seems much more at his leisure than Killian but still. It is the slightly glossy look that takes over Elsa’s eyes that brings the sudden realization of her meaning to Emma.

“Whatever do you—” Mary Margaret’s quiet voice draws Emma’s attention to her friend and she watches the process of understanding play out across her features. “Oh. I didn’t— I mean, we… Is it— Is it nice?”

Emma bites hard at her lip and nods vigorously.

*****

“But Alice is alright?”

“Aye, they are both perfectly fine. They haven’t seen any trouble or unwanted attention since.”

Liam sighs and shakes his head.

“She never did do things the conventional way.”

“Liam,” Killian narrows his eyes and the hint of a warning in his tone makes his brother raise his hands in supplication.

“Never said she should, just…” he shrugs and rubs his temples for a few seconds before deciding that another sip of rum would do him better. “But Emma has been fine with it all?”

His little brother’s face softens immediately and Liam makes a note of this magical way to mellow Killian down.

“She’s been wonderful.”

He feels something warm and serene spread over his shoulders at Killian’s smile. Then Liam puffs out his chest and spreads his arms wide.

“I’m ready to accept your thanks at any point.”

Killian sighs in what Liam hopes is faux annoyance as he takes his own glass in hand and crosses his arms over his chest.

“I thought we’d settled on—“

Liam waves him off.

“Not that.”

“Then what laurels do you wish to lay claim to, brother?”

“Why, introducing you to your wonderful wife, of course.”

Killian’s eyebrows go high in amusement as he leans back in his chair and takes a sip of his drink.

“In truth, you didn’t exactly introduce us.”

“I as good as brought her to your door,” he fires back half in jest and grins at Killian’s laughter.

“You spent every day between my proposal to her grandmother and our nuptials trying to convince me what a rotten idea the whole thing was!”

“Which I know is the surest way to make you do something, little brother” Liam finishes matter-of-factly, more than a little pleased with himself when Killian proceeds to open and shut his mouth in quick succession.

For a second Killian just watches him with narrowed eyes but Liam refuses to let the smug grin leave his face until his brother chuckles and shakes his head in defeat.

“Thank you for introducing me to my wonderful wife, Liam.”

Liam grins – knowing he can’t take any real credit for most of it does little to diminish his satisfaction with his brother’s happiness.

*****

It’s a cold but clear day and there are still a couple more serviceable hours of daylight when he hears Emma come home. Killian leans back in his leather chair and starts counting back from ten with a smile that is just on the right side of expectant and far beyond smitten.

She comes through the door at four – hat in one hand, the other still unwinding her shawl, cheeks flushed from the chilly air outside and a couple of pins sticking out of her slightly askew bun. She has shed her coat and her dress is lovely and her face is animated by whatever transpired at his brother’s home while the man himself was here and Killian is still amazed that a woman this beautiful shares his bed.

“Why didn’t you tell me tea parties are so… bizarre?”

She tosses her things on the chair across his desk and plants her hands on her hips and there is some kind of joke lurking in her bright eyes. Killian raises an eyebrow.

“Do I look like I spend a lot of time drinking tea with respectable ladies?”

Her lips purse as if to respond but them her shoulders drop a little and she smiles sheepishly. Killian reaches out and, when he feels her cold fingers close around his own, he gives a little tug. Emma comes closer all too willingly, hitching her skirts up so she can settle in his lap. He sets her hand under his shirt where the top few buttons have been undone and brings the other one to his mouth, blowing hot air over her delicate skin. He takes extreme pleasure in how quickly she warms up and proceeds to kiss her nose and cheeks and release her hair from its ruined coiffure.

“I take it Mrs Nolan and my sister-in-law did a fine job of entertaining you, my queen?”

“I believe I was the one that entertained them,” she says drily

He does his best to ignore the fact that her hand has seized the opportunity to undo another couple of buttons of his shirt and looks up, studying her face for any sign that something has upset her. But Emma just shakes her head and mumbles something about the afternoon being “very interesting and enlightening” as she leans in and presses her lips to his temple before she starts sliding her way to his mouth.

“And yours, my heart?”

He huffs a little and tries to recall anything beyond the scent of her and how she skin feels below this outrageous corset.

“I will be visiting Captain Nemo for a couple of days to conduct some business in mine and Liam’s name. And collect a ridiculous commission from my imprudent brother for it.”

It was a concession on his part but Liam still found it necessary to point out that he can sometimes take things without working so damn hard for them. Killian made sure to point out how very piratical of him that sounded.

Emma pulls away and he is sure that she is not aware of the way her lower lip juts out slightly – pink and so very tempting.

“When?”

“At the end of the week.”

She looks like she is trying very hard not to show her displeasure and he goes for some levity.

“You know, most women don’t mind that much when their husbands make themselves scarce for a bit.”

Her look is very much not amused and her hands are definitely not where he placed them anymore.

“Most women aren’t married to you.”

Before he can respond, she is on her feet and half way to the door and Killian’s heart lurches after her. He knows his increased engagements and small trips are the thing she dislikes the most, even if she hasn’t said anything, but he hoped this will be the last one and perhaps—

“Emma. Love, I’m sorry, I—“ the sound of the key being turned in the lock echoes in the small study. “Emma?”

“As a man who will be going away at the end of the week,” she makes her way back to his desk, her hands fiddling behind her, obviously trying to loosen her corset a bit. “You are done for the day.”

She snaps the ledger on his desk closed and telling her that’s not the one he’d been working on is the furthest thing from his mind as she kisses him deeply. His chair screeches back a few inches and in the next moment Emma is on her knees between him and his desk.

Killian swallows and frowns, even as he feels his groin tighten at the very sight of her.

“What are you doing, love?”

“You’re smarter than to ask that, Captain.”

He opens his mouth and almost bites his tongue when he feels her small hand cup him through his pants.

“Bloody hell.”

Emma smiles – obviously surprised and delighted by his immediate reaction, and tugs at the laces of his pants. As she shuffles forward, his legs fall open of their own volition to let her settle comfortable. The picture she presents makes him hard as a rock and his hand squeezes the armrest so it doesn’t reach for her but part of him still feels strange having a lady – his wife – on her knees before him, between his legs.

“Queens are not supposed to kneel,” he says, a small part of him trying to dissuade her from her path of action while the rest of him growls and snaps at it.

Emma gives him a look from under her eyelashes even as she gives one last tug on his pants and shamelessly takes him in hand.

“Not even when they wish to?”

Whatever words he might have thrown together in response she swallows along with his cock and Killian is a fool but not fool enough to protest further – not when he can feel the flat of her tongue against him and her lips around him and her hair brushing his skin.

“Christ.”

Her hair is a sight indeed – his lap full of tangled blonde curls that rustle in time with the movements of her mouth. He bites hard on his lip and lets the inhuman groan building inside him through his nose. He doesn’t know how his body remembers to keep breathing when he knows every sensation in it is centered on her and only her.

He feels her nose brush against him, feels her throat muscles tighten as she chokes a little – once, twice, as she tries to take him all in. That’s when he finally allows his hand to touch her – combing lightly through her hair before it slips down to rub his thumb over her jaw, coaxing her to relax and not try anything that’s giving her difficulty.

Emma seems to get the message because her mouth retreads a little and she glances up at him through her hair, something self-conscious in her eyes that smooths out when she takes in his expression.

Killian is not sure what his face is capable of communicating in this moment – desire, gratification, incredulity, awe – certainly not everything he is feeling. He brushes the strands of gold that have fallen in her eyes and looking her in the eyes as she continues her ministrations almost makes him lose control and come right then and there.

“Love, you might wan— Fuck, I’m—“

He sees her frown in thought before he feels her hands slide over his thighs. Then he sees and feels her cheeks hollow around him and he is lost.

When his vision clears and sensation returns to his legs and arms, Killian can do little but moan at the feel of her tongue running leisurely over him before she lays her cheek on his thigh, her warm breaths washing over him in a marriage of deep bliss and light torture.

He curls a strand of her hair around his finger and when she looks up the almost innocent and bashful look on her face is the last thing he expects.

“Was that alright?”

He groans and instead of answering helps her up and back onto his lap, his hand cupping her head and bringing her closer. She stops a hair’s breadth from his lips – a doubt, a question, in her eyes that he answers by running his tongue over her lower lip until she opens up for him.

“I do not mean to disparage your vocabulary, love,” he says as his fingers work diligently on freeing her breasts from the confines of her dress. “But if you are going to be doing things like that to me, you’ll have to find something a bit stronger than “alright” in the dictionary.”

He palms one of her breasts and bites lightly at the other – his cock stirring again at the sound that seems to come from the very center of her and the newfound knowledge of how much Emma likes having her flesh between his teeth. He pulls back to admire the round red mark left behind before he glides his tongue and lips over it gently.

“Then again, sometimes I see and hear things that I can hardly put into words either.”

*****

She wakes up to the first snow, with Killian’s lips against her ribcage, asking her if she would like to meet a far more distinguished captain than himself.

The only reason she doesn’t start packing right away is that her legs have already locked around him.

*****

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lucifers-trash-stash · 5 years

Text

Sweet Indulgences

Summary: Ellie is requested to stop by after hours to help Chancellor Palpatine with paperwork. When wine and honeyed words are exchanged, she can't help but indulge in what comes next.

Word Count: 5252

Warnings: PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS. Extremely Non-con/dub con smut situations, alcohol/drunk sex, gaslighting and emotional manipulation, boss/employee relationship, age difference, loss of virginity.

It wasn’t unusual for Ellie Reeshe to be called to assist Chancellor Palpatine with his workload. Even though she was Vice Chair Mas Amedda’s intern, Palpatine would request her assistance from time to time. He wasn’t the kind of man that would be able to make time to teach his own intern, not to mention that he was much too powerful of a man to trust his information to just any young intern. Yet he trusted her enough from her work with Amedda that he granted her as a sole exception.

But being requested after hours was unusual. Palpatine had typically asked for her help when he attended meetings and otherwise couldn’t keep up with the copious amounts of paperwork that piled up in his absence. He didn’t let anyone visit him at night unless they were a trusted colleague. And yet here Ellie was, walking into his office with her datapad clutched to her chest nervously. It wasn’t like she didn’t trust the Chancellor, but she found the arrangement to be unusual to say the least.

When she didn’t find him the expansive main office, she felt her mouth dry slightly. Ellie always did her work there. It was this public office, and the fact that he wasn’t here made her uneasy. He must be in his private office, where she had never been invited before. But if he wasn’t here, process of elimination dictated that she had to wander deeper into his office. The thought created butterflies in her stomach, and a subtle fluttering even below that.

Ellie harbored feelings of desire for the Chancellor. As often as she tried to push those feelings aside, they still arose within her. She knew they could never be fulfilled. He was Supreme Chancellor for kriff’s sake. Even though he was a bachelor he would never look twice at her. Especially if he knew how inexperienced she was. Ellie had never laid with a man before, and she couldn’t help but fantasize about the Chancellor. He was everything she wanted in a partner; insanely brilliant, skilled in his position, and quite handsome as well. He held an air of regality and his traditional clothes he had tailor made from his home planet of Naboo only enhanced his heightened status.

With a deep breath, she pushed those lustful feelings aside. The Chancellor needed her help tonight. She needed to stay focused and do her job dutifully. Shaking her head to rid herself of her deeper feelings, Ellie made her way through his side hallway and approached the door to his private office, which was already open and beckoning her to enter.

As she passed the threshold, Chancellor Palpatine’s gaze flickered up from his work. He smiled warmly at her, urging her inside. “Miss Reeshe,” he said, her name rolling gracefully off his tongue. “Please, come in. I apologize for asking you to come in so late.”

“It’s no trouble at all, Chancellor.” She sat down on the sofa that Palpatine gestured to. He was sitting in his own chair in front of his console, reading over what looked like walls of text about whatever important matters needed his attention this time.

She took a moment to admire the room. Unlike his main office in red, this room and its furnishings were sleek black. The wide window encompassing the room allowed for the beautiful night life of Coruscant’s many skyscrapers to shine brightly through. She couldn't even begin to imagine what waking up to this view every morning must be like. If anything it reminded her of the societal divide between her and the Chancellor.

Palpatine wasted no time sending her the documents to her datapad, where she looked over the files and parsed out the most important information. Ellie found it much easier to relax when she was doing paperwork and felt less distracted by the Chancellor’s presence when she was able to occupy her mind. However, as the minutes turned into hours, she felt her attention faltering little by little. She did her best to stifle her yawns, but Palpatine noticed immediately.

He stood up from his chair with a short sigh, bringing her attention back to him. “Perhaps it is time for a short reprieve, wouldn’t you agree?” Ellie nodded and Palpatine glanced down at her briefly with a warm look in his eyes before turning to retrieve something from a cabinet in the corner of the room.

Palpatine returned with two crystal wine glasses and a bottle of wine, sending Ellie’s mind into a tailspin. “Chancellor, I really shouldn’t,” she began to protest.

“Nonsense,” Palpatine said, waving her anxieties away with a comforting expression. “It is really no problem at all. Besides, this is blossom wine from Naboo, it helps to relax the mind.”

As Palpatine sat beside her on the sofa and popped the cork from the wine, Ellie insisted, “Please, I wouldn’t want to impose.”

“You work so diligently, Miss Reeshe. Even you deserve to indulge now and then.”

She silently watched him pour a small amount into each glass. It really wasn’t that much, she told herself. A few sips wouldn’t hurt her. Besides, how could she turn down the Chancellor? She really didn't want to disappoint the man she admired so much.

When he handed her the glass and she took a sip, Ellie felt the flavor slowly bloom over her taste buds. She had never tasted anything like it before and had to hold herself back from gulping the whole glass down. It was smooth and comforting, like sinking into her bed after a stressful day. Her muscles relaxed and she felt herself meld into the couch and simply enjoy the moment she had here.

“This is very delicious, thank you,” Ellie said, nodding in appreciation to her superior. Palpatine’s eyes glimmered in amusement and took a sip from his own glass.

It wasn’t long before Ellie felt relaxed enough to open up to the Chancellor, discussing things other than politics. Her love for the arts for one, which he shared as well. Palaptine had pointed to many of the pieces around the room, explaining to her their histories in wonderous detail. He told her of the most recent show he attended, her attention focused entirely on his expert storytelling, his voice drawing her in and creating such fantastical pictures. She hadn’t even noticed how often Palpatine had offered to pour more blossom wine for her, and how often she accepted because she was finally having a pleasant evening with a man she so desperately desired but couldn’t have.

Palpatine paused for a brief moment in the conversation to sip his wine. Slowly and methodically, he changed the topic and asked her, “And how long have you held desire for me?”

Before Ellie could even realize the question she was being asked or think of the answer she was giving, she giggled and told him, “It was before Vice Chair Amedda formally introduced us, I always saw the HoloNet coverage of your work and I just-”

She froze. Her hand slowly crept over her mouth as she looked at the Chancellor in horror. Had she really just said that? She couldn’t believe herself. “Chancellor, I apologize,” she began before Palpatine interrupted her with a smile and a flippant wave of his hand.

“Come now, Miss Reeshe, we are both adults here. We can talk about such things in a civilized manner.” He chuckled briefly before continuing, “And it isn’t as if it is uncommon for others to find me intriguing in one way or another. Now, be honest with me. What about me strikes your interest? I’m curious to know what someone as young as you thinks of me.”

“Well I, uh,” Ellie stumbled over her words. “I find you quite… handsome, I will admit. And your presence when you hold meetings is incredible.” She paused for a moment to think while Palpatine simply drank more of his wine. “I think I’m attracted most by your intelligence. You always know the answers for everything even if all appears lost. I admire that about you.”

Palpatine pondered this answer for a moment before speaking again, “You have certainly thought about this in great detail, haven’t you?” When Ellie didn’t respond out of embarrassment, he continued. “I’m flattered. Truly. You have excellent taste. It shows your own intelligence in the best light, you know.”

Before Ellie had a chance to speak, Palpatine shifted himself so he better faced her, his attention fixated completely on her. “If you weren’t intelligent, you wouldn’t be here. You wouldn’t have been hired to be Amedda’s intern, and you certainly wouldn’t be here with me right now. I don’t place my confidence in many people, but I know you to be loyal and hardworking.” It was like he was able to read her insecurities with ease and used them to reassure her.

Before she knew it, Palpatine reached out for her, his fingers gently stroking along her cheek and up under the point of her chin, lifting her eyes to his. Sparks flew across her skin where he made contact, but she didn’t dare lean into them. Ellie’s eyes focused entirely on his, breathless as she listened to him speak.

“You’re quite the talented young woman, Miss Reeshe. Light Years ahead of your peers. You deserve to be in the company of those who fully appreciate the depths of your mind. No fool among your peers has managed that, have they?”

He continued without letting her answer. “And yet you still have much to learn.” His fingers gently traced along her hairline, brushing the stray strands behind her ear. “Your dedication to your studies have bourne you much fruit, but it not always the academic fruits which are sweetest. There is still so much yet you have to experience. Am I wrong?”

Ellie shook her head.

“This is what I have suspected. What lacks have you seen in your peers? You know they are not worthy of you.”

She struggled with the words. “It sounds terrible to say.”

“Say it.” Palpatine’s voice sounded icier.

Ellie gulped. “I felt as though I was… beyond them. That while I was trying my best to succeed all they cared about was greed. They didn’t get me. Not in the way someone with more experience could.”

“There is something to be said about how we grow with our experiences. For those that have experienced little, it’s hard for them to truly appreciate how precious life can be. And how to engage someone like you in the way that you deserve.”

“Yet it sounds like I’m being egotistical.”

“There is nothing wrong with a healthy confidence in one’s capabilities.” Palpatine pulled his hand back from her face as he took the empty glass from her hand and set it on the coffee table. “And to desire someone who would see you as you really are. More than just a companion to share a bed with. An intellectual equal.”

Ellie couldn’t help the blush that arose on her face. She tilted her head down, embarrassed to look him in the eye. “Thank you Chancellor.”

“No need to thank me, Miss Reeshe. I would find it an honor to be your mentor in this.” Palpatine gazed over her for a brief moment, the hairs on the back of her neck standing when placed under his scrutinizing eye. “You’ve grown quiet.”

Ellie shifted slightly, trying to figure out the best way to phrase her answer. “I just… Never know what to say. I don’t feel like I deserve praise of any sort. I just exist. And I desperately wish I could be confident enough to actually interest someone.” Ellie knew she should stop herself but she kept going, the words pouring out like a wishing fountain. “I just want to be noticed by someone. I want someone to think about wanting me in the same way I think about the men that catch my attention. I want an outlet but I can’t because no one would ever look twice at me. I’m nothing special.”

Palpatine leaned forward, and Ellie felt herself lean towards him as if pulled by a magnetic force. Slowly, he explained, “You say no one would look twice at you. Does this mean you haven’t noticed Amedda’s flirtations towards you?”

A shocked look flit across her face. How would Palpatine have known that? There were some lingering glances Amedda had given her over the past few weeks, but nothing more than that. She had to admit that those glances had left her mind wandering, but she wasn’t sure if it was simply desire or something more.

“If you were to ask me,” Palpatine began, gesturing with his hand. “I would say that I believe there was an inkling of compatibility between the two of you.” Ellie was prepared to sputter a response, but Palpatine stopped her. “I know he might not be the most appealing candidate considering his cold attitude and sharp sarcasm, however he is quite dutiful and serious with his job and he would do the same for you if given the opportunity.”

“But I don’t want Amedda!”

“Perhaps not. While he has his charms, he has not the wit to keep up with a mind such as yours.” A dangerous glint flit across Palpatine’s eyes for a brief second as he whispered, “Then who do you want?”

Realization crossed Ellie’s features. She had somehow walked into this line of questioning. Unsure of how to change the topic, she softly replied, “I have no one in mind currently.”

“Don’t lie to me. I remind you that we are adults, and there’s nothing stopping us from speaking honestly with each other.” He tilted his head to the side, looking at her as if he was chiding a small child. “Now, tell me.”

Ellie screwed her eyes shut in frustration and embarrassment. She couldn’t bear to look at him. Her emotions ricocheted off the walls in her mind, desperately trying to calm herself. And yet, she felt herself growing wet from the notion that she would have to tell him. He would know her secret desires for him. And perhaps he would do something about it.

“You.” She spat the word out as soon as she was able to conjure it. When she heard his long exhale, she quickly opened her eyes and stumbled over her words, “I know such feelings are wrong and that nothing can ever happen. You’re Chancellor, and I’m simply an intern. It would be scandalous and a stain on your career-”

Palpatine gestured his hand to quiet her, and surprisingly it worked. He held the silence for a long moment, watching as she twisted her hands in her lap, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. Finally, he spoke, “You are correct in your being an intern. You’re here to learn and be taught by the greatest minds the galaxy has to offer. And you’re desperately looking for someone to mentor this spark for knowledge within you.” His eyes flit up to hers, his voice low. “I was not lying when I said I would find it an honor. You have great potential and I see more than a little enjoyment for myself in the arrangement.”

His hand now cupped Ellie’s cheek, tilting her head to face him as he continued. “I should hope you would trust me enough to teach you more than what you would learn behind your datapad. In order to keep your desires in check, it would be pertinent for you to have an outlet to indulge in them freely and without judgement. Do you understand, Ellie?”

She shivered at the sound of her name on his lips. Her head was swimming and her inhibitions were lowered by the wine. Ellie’s nervousness wouldn’t get in the way even if she wanted it to. Nothing could push the idea that this was wrong out of her mind. All she wanted was Palpatine, and he was offering all of that to her and more.

Ellie couldn’t help how quickly her mouth sought his, how her body pressed so close to him as he returned the kiss with vigor. His mouth tasted like the wine, tangy and sweet on his tongue as he explored her mouth. His free hand gripped her hip, pulling her body closer to his as he wrapped his other arm around the back of her neck, holding her in place.

Ellie gasped as his kisses trailed lower, her fingers gripping onto his robes as he pressed fevered kisses down her jaw, her neck, and stopping above the collar of her shirt. It wasn’t until her back was pressed against the couch that she realized he had laid her down and was on top of her now, his hands slowly lifting her shirt up.

She couldn’t help how her hips canted up to meet his, her fingers tugging at the fabric of his clothes in a desperate attempt to pry them open. Ellie whined pitifully as she couldn’t figure out the complexities of how his robes were fastened, and Palpatine simply chuckled at her attempts.

With her shirt rucked up over her stomach, Palpatine’s fingers had room to work on the button of her pants. She barely registered how quickly his fingers slipped inside her panties, rubbing her bud so tenderly. She cried out, the sensations too much to handle. The wine had left her so needy, and he knew this all too well, his fingers skillfully working in the ways that he knew she needed to be pleased.

“So wet already,” he mused as his fingers drifted lower, finding her entrance. She jolted in his grip as he let one finger roam inside, pressing against her tight walls while his thumb continued to rub her clit with fervor. “You’ve waited so long for someone to do this to you, haven’t you? For me to do this to you.”

Ellie could only whimper in response, her eyes shut tight as she struggled to keep herself from coming too quickly. However, the effort was in vain, as he was simply more knowledgeable in this subject than she would have ever dreamed. She saw stars behind her eyes as her knuckles grew white with how tightly she clung to him. Her back arched to meet his body, demanding more even as she shuddered beneath his touch.

When she opened her eyes, Palpatine smiled down at her, his mouth finding hers as she eagerly returned the kiss. His fingers still pressed lazy circles on her clit, just enough to build her desire back up again. When he pulled away, he brought her up with him. She clung to him on shaky legs, afraid that if she let go she would fall flat on her face. He glanced down at her with amusement but continued to hold her in his arms, letting the last few waves of pleasure subside before beginning to lead her to another door. “Come along, my dear. You don’t deserve to experience the things I am going to do to you while lying on a couch.”

She let him guide her into his bedroom, every inch bathed in a deep red color. The walls, the furniture, the satin sheets on his luxurious bed. The color overwhelmed her, filled her with passion that she wasn’t sure if it was aided by the wine or not. She felt lightheaded, her mind swimming contently as she allowed Palpatine to guide her where he wanted her.

Ellie clung to his shoulders as he made quick work of her clothes, swaying gently as her legs trembled beneath her. She let him pull down her panties and remove her bra so she was completely bare before him. The only reason she didn’t cover herself in embarrassment was because she was too busy holding onto him for stability. He gazed down at her body in reverence, ghosting his fingers over the curves of her body, almost as if he was keeping his desire under control and waiting before fully giving into his own needs.

He slowly backed her into the bed behind her, the feeling of the mattress on the back of her thighs sending chills down her spine. With his wordless insistence, she sat down on the bed in front of him, looking up at him in curiosity with what he had planned for her next.

“Relax, and lie down for me.” He said, stepping back for a moment to allow her the space to scoot up his bed. His eyes roamed her prone form laid out before him as he began to unfasten his robes, murmuring, “Good girl. So very eager.”

Ellie watched as he slowly shed not only his robes, but his underclothes as well. She felt the blush crawl up her cheeks while he maintained eye contact as he pulled his shirt over his head, revealing his chest speckled with silver hair that she longed to run her fingers through. He worked to remove his pants, and she tried to sit up so she could help him. Before she could he responded with a firm, “Keep still. Be patient and wait. You will get your pleasure soon.”

Ellie reclined again, watching him pull down his pants while her thighs pinched together in need. While she had never been with a man before, she could tell he was above average in some respects, as even when he was not fully hard he was a sight to behold. She wanted to kneel down in front of him and please him, but that would be for another time.

Instead, Palaptine gripped her thighs and pried them open, a beguiled expression on his face as he watched her whimper. “Don’t worry, my dear,” he said, pressing a kiss to the inside of her thigh. “I imagine you’ll enjoy this immensely.”

He dipped his head to meet her sex, his tongue flicking out tentitively to test her sensitivity. Ellie twitched, her body arching as she craved for him to do more to her. At her invitation, Palaptine leaned forward, his tongue moving up and down her slick wetness and returning once more to her bud, pressing a kiss there. When her legs tried to instinctively shut around his head, she was surprised that she didn’t budge. His grip on her was so tight that she couldn’t even move. It made her want to panic, but more than that it made her want him to simply take her. To strip her of her innocence and ravage her.

“Watch,” he commanded, waiting until her eyes met his before returning once more to her core. She wanted so badly to throw her head back in pleasure, but Palaptine kept her gaze all while he worked his tongue against her clit, flicking and sucking and making her desire pool even more. He made quick work of her growing wetness, lapping up the juices at her entrance no matter how much she whined and writhed in his grip. She was at his mercy, and she loved every second of it.

She was almost embarrassed at how easily she continued to come from his touch, how every time she thought he might stand up and give her a reprieve, he chased her next orgasm quickly and with reckless abandon, setting her nerves on fire each time. The sounds that came out of Ellie’s mouth were so vulgar and unlike her, but she found it freeing to let go and indulge, just as Palpatine had told her to.

Finally, after melting into the bed from her previous orgasm, Palpatine released his grip on her thighs, allowing her to relax. He stared down at her for a brief moment, admiring his work as she panted and whined beneath him. She was so tired but she needed more. She needed all of him. Ellie was too embarrassed to say the words so she let out a pitiful, “Please.”

His eyes lit up as he stepped closer to the bed, deciding to let her have what she craved. He lifted her legs and gestured for her to scoot further up on the bed. He crawled in after her, his body hovering inches from her as he set up the pillows behind her to prop herself up on. While Ellie made herself comfortable, Palpatine nudged himself between her thighs, propping them up against his own and she wrapped them around his waist instinctively. His body caged her, keeping her from squirming away from him even though she knew she could never, not this close to getting what she wanted.

When he slid his cock up and down her slit she shivered, wrapping her arms around his shoulders as he stared down at her and watched her reaction. Finally, his cock stopped right at her entrance, the head already pressing against her eagerly. “Are you ready for me, Ellie?”

“Please, Chancellor,” Ellie whimpered, pressing her body closer to his. “I need you.”

He hummed gently as he pressed in closer, his cock slowly entering her. She winced at the discomfort, but so far everything was all right. She trusted him, after all.

Palpatine leaned over her, pressing his forehead against her neck as he sought to go deeper, her walls tight around his member as he gasped softly at the sensation. “You may call me Palpatine if you prefer.”

And as he bottomed out inside of her, Palpatine was what she called out when he held still inside her as she adjusted to him. Ellie had never felt this sensation before, and she so desperately wanted to cling to the moment for as long as she could stand to. Her head flooded with stimuli and she clung to him desperately for stability. She felt his member throb inside her, so tight against her and all she could see was red everywhere and her mind was frantic with desire. All she wanted was Palaptine and here he was, deep inside her as she held tightly to him in the silent, intimate moment they shared.

He began to move slowly, pulling back ever so slightly before rocking himself back into her completely. Ellie whined as he did it again and again, each time slowly pulling out even further before rutting back inside of her. Before she could get used to it, it became rhythmic, the sound of their bodies against each other echoing through the room, her gasps and moans echoing in her own ears. Palpatine buried his face in the crook of her neck and gripped her hips, growling low in his throat.

Suddenly, he pulled up from her grasp, holding onto her hips tightly as he began to set a ruthless pace. From this angle he could rock into her faster and faster, the bed creaking beneath the both of him. Her body swayed in time with him, her hands finding his as she held onto him for dear life. Her back arched off of the bed, his head dipping down to place sloppy kisses along her breasts, one of his hands wrapping around her lower back to hold her in place. Then his fingertips brushed against her clit, lighting fireworks inside of her as she cried out, holding on desperately to him as she felt his warm release pour into her, his groan mingling with hers.

Before she knew it, Palpatine was resting on top of her, the two of them simply lingering in the limbo of the moment. She held onto him, running her fingers through his hair as he placed soft kisses against her collarbone. Eventually he pulled away from her, leaving her empty again with their combined juices dripping out of her. Ellie rested her eyes as he shuffled about the room, listening to the water run for a brief moment before he returned to the bed.

She opened her eyes when she felt his hand nudge open her thighs and pressed a warm cloth against her, cleaning most of the mess he had made of her. He wore a red bathrobe now, and he actually looked more chipper than usual. He always looked so stressed and tired normally, but where sex had made her utterly exhausted he looked revitalized. He practically glowed.

When he moved away again, she allowed her body settle, feeling her eyes shut on her even though she was too tired to draw the sheets up over her cooled down body. Ellie drifted for a brief moment before she jolted awake when Palpatine entered the room again, this time the sweet smell of tea wafting around him.

Ellie shifted in bed as Palpatine sat up, setting the tea on the side table as he pulled the sheets up over the both of them and offered her a cup. “How are you still awake,” she mumbled, which made Palaptine chuckle.

“Your stamina will improve over time, I assure you,” he said with a wink. “Drink. You’ll regret not having it when you wake up tomorrow with a sore throat after all the screaming you’ve done tonight.”

With a whine and a growing flush of her cheeks, she sat up in bed propped against Palpatine for support while she sipped her tea. He took a sip of his and flipped through his datapad, reading various articles as her eyes tried to keep up with him but he read much too fast for her. “Do you ever sleep?”

“Of course,” he responded. “Just not for very long.”

Ellie hummed in response but said no more. Her eyelids kept drooping as she leaned her head on Palpatine’s shoulder. He took the tea from her hands before she had the chance to spill it. He wrapped his free arm around her body and pulled her closer, her head resting on his chest as she sighed in contentment.

“I enjoyed tonight,” Ellie mumbled just loud enough for Palpatine to hear.

“I’m glad,” he said, an alluring tone in his voice. “There will be many opportunities to thoroughly enjoy each other in a multitude of ways.”

She whined. “I don’t want to have to work tomorrow. Too tired.”

Palpatine hummed. “You won’t have to. Tomorrow morning I will be informing Amedda of your switch. You’ll be my intern now.”

Ellie immediately sat up and looked into his eyes. She tried to see if he was kidding, but he looked as serious as ever. “But what would people think? They know me as Mas Amedda’s intern, I can’t just-”

“Do you forget that I’m Chancellor?” Palpatine stroked her chin with his fingers. “No one would dare question me even if they did have suspicions. If anyone asks, I will simply tell them that I needed the extra help, which would seem suspicious to none.” He leaned forward, pressing his lips softly against hers. “No one needs to know what else I am teaching you.”

Ellie slowly nodded, her heart fluttering in her chest at the news. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it, however she knew right now that if she wasn’t exhausted she would have gushed and thanked him up and down for the opportunity to serve him, in more ways than one. Instead, she pressed another kiss to his lips before whispering, “Thank you.”

She wasn’t sure when Palpatine finally went to bed, but all she knew was that she fell asleep on his chest shortly afterward, curled up by his side while he lovingly caressed her hip as a way to lull her to sleep.

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