#i was listening to FUCKING MITSKI WHEN READING
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whenever i hear a song that i would like if it weren’t for the fact that it was too long, i think about this:
like you can afford to write tangentially if you/your music is already popular and you know that people are going to listen to you no matter what and in fact laud your longer pieces as being genius etc but can you really be releasing 5+ minute long songs without a built-in audience?
#idk. thinking about this because of the new lana album and i think i’d like a lot of these songs better if they were shorter lol#some of these songs drag so much especially when she includes these long sections of like one repeated line over and over again#or like when taylor swift releases the extended version of all too well and everyone freaked out#that’s all good and well but she HAD to release the shorter version first#and she knows she has this huge fanbase that will eat that shit up no matter what she does really#part of it is nostalgia admittedly but i also think the shorter version is just a better song#that song is on the longer side to begin with but 10 minutes???? why#(i did listen to both songs back to back to make sure my opinion was still the same as when the 10 minute version was released & it is lol)#idk! obviously i’m bad at this myself because i write so fucking much to express a simple point but it is more skillful to be able#to say things as effectively and precisely in a more concise way#not saying this ONLY applies to mitski because she’s the one this article is about but she is a good example of it#like being able to express a feeling in just a couple lines that would probably take a less skilled writer like a novel to express#it also reminds me of how my high school latin teacher described how in college he took a class about museum design or something like that#and their first assignment was to write a description of an artifact to tell museum visitors what it was#and every time he submitted a draft the professor would tell him to make it shorter while still communicating the necessary information#until he literally could not make it any shorter than it already was#because you have to assume that people are not gonna read all that! because they won’t unless they have some kind of external motivation to#idk there IS something to be said for including ‘unnecessary’ parts of writing etc obviously there’s nuance#but a lot of the time i think if there isn’t a reason to include something then why include it!
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this new sufjan album is going to fully rearrange my brain chemistry I can already feel it
#noticed the new single this morning but saved it for later cuz i didnt want to risk the psychic damage of listening to a track called-#'will anybody ever love me' right before a job interview 💀#but damn its good. going to the local early listening party next week hehe#also just discovered film school everyone say thank u last.fm for actually generating good music recs 😳😳😳😳#the recs i get suggested based off my listening to so much bdrmm are always >>>>>>>#bdrmm were INSANELY good live. genuinely think a lot of ppl who act disdainful of shoegaze would change their minds if they went to a gig#the richness and texture of the sound cant be summed up in an audio recording u have to be there and feel ur whole body thrum with it#its like floating in a wall of sound.. but the spotify versions sound soooo tame. not that i dont like them but its not the same#god im so fucking excited for slowdive. only a month and a half to go!!!!!!#listened to the new mitski album as well but honestly its not doing much for me rn#but usually when she releases new stuff it takes a little while to grow on me. i need to at least read the lyrics first..#I think esp w folk inspired artists u have to let the song approach u at the right time. ive def had eras when diff mitski albums appealed#but in my heart im a retired from sad girlie. actually at the risk of sounding like a fake fan ive never been able to get into puberty 2#or be the cowboy. i like a couple tracks but thematically theyve never spoken to me#makeout creek/laurel hell are in the middle theres a couple on them that have me by the throat. lush is my 2nd fave i think#but yeah i dont think ill ever be able to extricate myself emotionally from retired from sad that was my first breakup album!!!!#.diaries#anyway back 2 translation state..
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I thought I'd keep my Emotional Support Fic Yearly Reread for september/october when I'll be stressed out of my mind living alone with paperwork and schoolwork to do but actually I think right now is a good time
#the first time i read it was what. two and a half years ago?#i was in a very different (worse) place but i still need my cloth fanfic y'know#because i'm already stressed out about paperwork and living arrangements and mental & physical health#the fic is pacify btw. it's good to focus on someone else's struggles and pain and recovery#especially when those other someones are not real people and i don't have to really feel bad they're going through atrocious shit#also the songs i associate with the fic (which are many) are songs i don't want to listen to too much outside of pacify rereads#they're really good i just try not to listen to them without pacify because i don't want to stop associating them with the fic#they're - i've already said it but they're split in three parts#one that runs from the start to that moment in the tower during the battle#then from there til the evil is vainquished in the coolest way possible#and then til the end of part 7 since the author is still still working on part 8#so part one is handmade heaven - fear and loathing - karma‚ all by marina#part two is nobody and washing machine heart by mitski#and part three is the 7 minute version of plastic love by mariya takeuchi and happy by mitski#the songs don't actually fit the fic that much but they fit it in my head by association so whatever#hopefully i'll manage to finish my diptych project thing this summee#summer* ugh#anyway back to reading#i've reached the bit where Someone is made aware that some people have an expiration date and go fuck it we ball#not giving names because last time i did that i had to defend myself before a jury of my mutuals and i don't need that right now#it's just. it's a good part. well no it sucks for everyone it's the part that hurts (half of the fic) but like. it's good#wow i have a ramble tag now
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still not okay 😭
#i know mitski (and this song especially) is BEYOND overdone but DAMN#i am not joking when i say this is the grant-est song of all time#like EVERY LINE#also ofc his gay ass would listen to mitski its perfect#ive said it before#he probably listens to the smiths and reads richard siken and shit 😭😭😭#its okay hes my babygirl (read: grown ass man in his mid-30s ❤️)#also wish list by devi bc like.. yes.#its a fucking mlp fansong but i DO NOT CARE#the lyrics and vocals are so tasty even though its like physically difficult to listen to
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NOBODY’S BUSINESS ✹ luke castellan
part one
( summary ) social media au where luke’s sudden spike in confidence turns a few heads, including the head of your ex who just loves to jump in other people’s business
( pairing ) luke castellan x fem aphrodite counsellor!reader , mentions of ex bf! hephaestus camper x reader
( notes ) this feels a bit rushed bcs i’m sick rn but i hope you guys enjoy anyway!!
♫ American Teenager by Ethel Cain
♡ liked by maxwalsh , silenabeauregard , and others
yourusername proof that percy doesn’t actually hate luke
seaweedbrain hey girlie!!! can you take this down like immediately?? not to sound to mean or anything but i can and will find you 😇
yourusername you’re such a cutie perce
seaweedbrain kys
sarahdawson totally wasn’t held at gunpoint for that last pic guys no need to worry
connorstroll we weren’t worrying but thanks anyway ig
sarahdawson sleep with one eye open.
lukecastellan 2/10 post
yourusername sorry for messing with your tough guy image 😔
lukecastellan actually it only loses points bcs there’s no pics of you
chrisrodriguez WOAHHHHHHH
sarahdawson HIS BALLS FINALLY DROPPED
clarisselarue bit sad to know they weren’t completely crushed after the red team kicked their ass icl
yourusername oh trust they were all whining about it the second i put away the camera
clarisselarue good.
GROUPCHAT — chb’s finest
clarisselarue: y/n what is max doing in your likes…
sarahdawson: HES WHAT
sarahdawson: oh he’s brave
yourusername: IDK HE JUST APPEARED
yourusername: like a bug
seaweedbrain: or a rat
yourusername: that too
lukecastellan: he’s on his way for training with me rn so i’ll go extra hard on him
silenabeauregard: homoerotic subtext goes crazy
yourusername: thanks luke but really you don’t need to do that
yourusername: like i’m over him now and i just want to forget about him altogether
lukecastellan: he deserves a hard time for what he did to you anyway
lukecastellan: you deserve way better than that
lukecastellan: i mean anyone would
seaweedbrain: great save bro
lukecastellan removed seaweedbrain.
sarahdawson: oh you took that one personally
DIRECT MESSAGES
clarisselarue: ok when did you get game
lukecastellan: idk what you’re talking about
clarisselarue: oh please spare me i’ve had to watch you make googoo eyes for the past two years you can’t lie you’re way out of this one
lukecastellan: seriously idk what you’re talking about clarisse
clairsselarue: ok fine whatever but HYPOTHETICALLY if you were to try anything with my girl i want you to know that i approve but trust if you go a toe out of line then you will be dealt with
read.
♫ My Love Mine All Mine by Mitski
♡ liked by drewtanaka, hazellevesque , and others
[ tagged: sarahdawson ]
yourusername you’re the only thing i’ll ever thank a man for
yourusername thanks max
this comment was deleted.
sarahdawson I SAW THAT COMMENT GIRL THAT WAS BRAVE
drewtanaka surprised sar isn’t screaming for photo creds for the second slide
sarahdawson bcs i didn’t take it……..
silenabeauregard WOAH WHAT
pipermclean yourusername hey sis can we have a chat please
yourusername nope i’m doing cabin checks rn #counsellorissues
wisegirll i’m doing cabin checks rn though???
silenabeauregard the plot thickens
lukecastellan glad to see you listened to my advice
yourusername felt bad keeping my beauty from everyone
lukecastellan it was a rough time without it
groverunderwood chrisrodriguez now THESE are moves
chrisrodriguez LOOK AT MY BOY GO gods is this what normal parents feel when their kids go to college
maxwalsh nice earrings
this comment was deleted.
seaweedbrain we all saw that comment right…
clarisselarue yes.
DIRECT MESSAGES
maxwalsh: hey can we please talk
yourusername: no
maxwalsh: please babe cmon you didn’t even hear me out
yourusername: because you tried to kiss sarah you fucking asshole
maxwalsh: no it wasn’t like that you don’t get it
maxwalsh: look can you just meet me by our old spot and i can explain everything
yourusername: no
maxwalsh: babe you’re not acting like yourself
yourusername: bcs it’s not her, she’s asleep rn and she’s not your “babe”
maxwalsh: who tf is this???
yourusername: doesn’t matter
yourusername blocked maxwalsh.
lukecastellan posted to their story!
SARAHDAWSON replied to your story
sarahdawson: WOAHWOAHWOAHWOAH SLOW YOUR ROLL WHAT
CLAIRSSELARUE replied to your story
clairsselarue: “idk what you’re talking abt clarisse” oh i hate you so bad
SILENABEAUREGARD replied to your story
silenabeauregard: i’d know that silhouette anywhere…
CHRISRODRIGUEZ replied to your story
chrisrodriguez: i’m a bit hurt i wasn’t told in depth about this before but i’m too proud to pay attention to it GOOD FOR YOU MAN
MAXWALSH replied to your story
maxwalsh: so it was you who had her phone the other day
maxwalsh: wtf man
lukecastellan: womp womp
lukecastellan: you snooze you lose and you lost big time
♫ Nobody’s Business by Rihanna, Chris Brown
♡ liked by jasongrace , racheledare , and others
[ tagged: yourusername ]
lukecastellan and it ain’t what??
yourusername AND IT AIN’T NOBODY’S BUSINESS
clarisselarue ok edward cullen why are you eating her neck like that
silenabeauregard everyone i took the hammock pic thank me please 🙏😇
yourusername thank you beautiful angel
seaweedbrain cute i guess…….
chrisrodriguez I ALWAYS HAD FAITH IN YOU BRO EVEN WHEN EVERYONE ELSE THOUGHT YOU WERE A LOSER WITH NO GAME, I STAYED ROOTING FOR YOU
lukecastellan appreciate you bro
lukecastellan wait people said that about me???
wisegirll my favs 😭🫶
yourusername AWE ILY ANNIE
seaweedbrain oh i’m just dirt to you then? chill.
wisegirll you’re so dramatic percy
seaweedbrain oh so mental health matters until I’M the one hurt? cool.
lukecastellan and y’all were saying i had no game
seaweedbrain okay luke see that’s just not funny because your dad literally dances on a revolving stage for a living
lukecastellan had to bring out the dad jokes because you know i’m right?
seaweedbrain why is your old age pension ass beefing with me instead of talking to ur girlfriend… weird behaviour
sarahdawson too cute i fear
sarahdawson but you i must remind you mr castellan, i made it onto her feed first. you will ALWAYS be second to me. always.
drewtanaka anyone else hear weeping from the hephaestus cabin…
leovaldez it’s really depressing
leovaldez i think he just punched a hole in the wall
cbeckendorf he did
pipermclean LMAO WHAT A FUCKING LOSER 😭😭☠️☠️
( taglist ) @perseus-jackass @harrysnovia
#charlie bushnell x reader#luke castellan x aphrodite!reader#luke castellan x you#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan#percy jackson and the olympians x reader#percy jackson x reader#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo x reader
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୨⎯ “I don’t smoke”- R.C
❥ Masterlist
Warnings: Dark!Rafe, Toxic relationship, Abusive relationship, Domestic violence, heavy drinking, violence, mentions of drugs, mentions past d/v, Rafe’s a narcissist, emotional abuse
Summary: based on ‘I don’t smoke’ by Mitski (you don’t have to listen to understand but I still recommend. You drink to much and everything goes so wrong.
A/n ✎: surpriseeee, I was taking a break but got randomly motivated lol, thank you for 300 followers!!! Ily all sm! My inbox is open btw, also pls reblog and comment if you enojoyed!! Also I recommend listening to the song while reading!! Tyy
Wc: 2.8k
18+ minors dni!!!
As you took a long drag of your cigarette, you thought about your night, how you ended up on the balcony of the Cameron house with a tear-stained face and a cigarette in hand.
You never smoked except for after you and your boyfriend got into it; nicotine’s supposed to relieve stress and calm the nerves, right? I mean, you weren't addicted, just a stress relief.
It made you laugh how almost every fight with your boyfriend was so stupid, usually a misunderstanding or him taking out his anger for something that had nothing to do with you.
You questioned why you always stayed with him; how could you be so in love with someone who mistreated you?
You laughed to yourself, taking another drag of your cig before inhaling, the warm breeze making contact with your slightly damp face, reminding you of why you were even out here; the sad realization brought fresh tears to your eyes, and before you knew it you were bawling again, sitting on the ground, knees brought to your chest, sobbing into your lap.
˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧ Earlier that night୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡
You and Rafe had ended up at a random party, some kook that Rafe knew from high school. Believe it or not, you enjoyed going to parties with Rafe. There was always an excuse to get as drunk and high as possible, and if you were faded enough, your thoughts would stop, and you finally felt at peace. It was honestly sad, but being in a relationship with Rafe, it was so hard to feel ok… to feel normal.
You guys had been at the party for about an hour, and you were already crossed, taking every drink offered to you in a heartbeat and even smoking with your boyfriend and his friends, but you could still feel, and you didn't like that, so you stumbled over to the drinks table, praying that there was at least enough left for a shot. Your vision was already spinning, and you were practically tripping over yourself, but you just wanted the pain in your heart to stop; that's it.
After what felt like a lifetime pushing through people and saying, ‘Excuse me,’ you finally made it. You reached for a bottle but didn't even read what it was; you were just desperate for anything. Your gut told you to stop drinking; you were nauseous, dizzy, felt heavy, and could barely walk straight, but your heart told you to keep going, so you did.
You poured yourself a shot, shaky, uncoordinated hands spilling a good amount on your fingers and the table. You drank the alcohol, tossing your head back as the bitter liquid made contact with your tongue before slightly burning the back of your throat. Your face scrunched up, looking around for a chaser but unable to find one.
As you stumbled around looking for your boyfriend, you bumped into at least five people, even causing one girl to spill her drink on herself; everything felt like it was going so fast yet so slow, and the world was spinning; you hated, but you loved this feeling, you were numb to your problems but also felt sick.
When you made eye contact with your boyfriend, he was sitting on the couch; you could barely make out the color of the sofa or who else was even on it; that's how fucked up you were.
You sat down next to him before even realizing what you were doing. You practically fell into him; before you knew it, you were lying on his shoulder and falling asleep.
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆
“Y/n!” you heard your boyfriend's voice echoing through your head before even opening your eyes; you kept them closed. You were still tired and wanted at least five more minutes of sleep.
“She's knocked out, man.” you heard another man who wasn't your boyfriend say, most likely one of his friends.
“Y/n!” Rafe shouted, now shaking you awake.
You were genuinely confused when you opened your eyes—three blurry figures standing before you. When your vision evened out, you saw Your boyfriend was staring at you with his fist clenched to the side, clearly angry, as his two friends stood beside him, but you were laying on Rafe, at least you thought you were, but when you lifted your head and looked to your side to see who you were laying on, it was some random guy.
You immediately jumped, scooting yourself away from the random blonde. You had never seen this man before, and when you layed next to him, you could have sworn he was your boyfriend.
You quickly stood up, still tired and still drunk. Your heart was beating rapidly, and the look on Rafe's face didn't help; he was arguing with the man you had been lying on; you heard the name ‘Evan’ slip from his mouth.
"What's your problem, man?" Evan questioned, his tone challenging; he kept his spot on the couch as you hid behind your boyfriend and his friends, still able to get a clear view of the altercation.
“I've seen the way you've looked at her before.” Your boyfriend drunkenly spat, referring to you; he talked with his hands aggressively. That was a bad sign, and it worried you; you just wanted to explain to him this was all an accident, a drunken mistake.
“Listen, man; Your girl was all over me.”
Evan replied, words laced with venom as he stood up from his spot on the couch.”Maybe control your bitch next time-”
Without another word, Rafe lunged forward, his fist connecting with Evan's jaw.
The force of the blow sent Evan stumbling backward, crashing into a nearby table, sending drinks flying in all directions, causing everybody around to stop and look.
Evan recovered quickly, launching himself at Rafe.
The two boys wrestled with each other; trading blows amidst the chaos of the party; a crowd formed around them as phones were being taken out to record.
You were horrified, wide eyes watching as Rafe pushed the other blonde to the floor before punching him repeatedly. You knew this was your fault, and you felt horrible. How could you have made such a big mistake?
Your tears spilled, and your hand covered your mouth as you watched Rafe's friend's topper and Kelce pull him away from the kook on the floor, finally separating them. Rafe looked so angry. He was breathing heavily, his knuckles bruised and bleeding, but when you looked at the bloody blonde on the floor, you gasped. You regretted even looking at him; blood covered his face as he rolled over slightly, coughing more blood up; you even heard someone mutter, “Call 911.”
When Rafe's friends finally let go of him, he didn't go back for more; he honestly seemed satisfied, and when he grabbed your wrist roughly, pulling you away from the now-dead party and to his truck, clearly trying to avoid the police you were honestly shocked, You had never witnessed rafe hurt someone that bad, I mean he was going crazy, you couldn’t get the image of Evans blood covered face out of your head. And the more you thought about it, the more grateful you were that Rafe had never caused that much harm to you. I mean, sometimes he would slap, chock, or grab you, but he had just shown you how much he was genuinely holding back.
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆
You had finally arrived at Tanneyhill after what felt like hours of complete silence as Rafe dropped his friends off. He refused to talk to you, ignoring you as you tried to explain to him that it was an accident and that you were just really fucked up. You were still drunk, not as drunk as you were when you originally made the mistake, but drunk enough to keep trying to talk to Rafe.
The thing was that you would rather argue with Rafe than be ignored; you hated when he punished you with the silent treatment; it made you want to curl up into a ball and cry, and you also didn't know how long he would keep this going, sometimes it was days, sometimes it was hours, you would much rather him just hit you and get it over with.
“Why would you even bring me here if you're going to ignore me?” You questioned Rafe, voices pleading for a response as you found your place on his bed.
He didn't even look up at you; instead, he rolled his eyes as he focused on his phone, scrolling through whatever social media app he was on.
“Are you fucking serious?” You recklessly said as tears started to brim your eyes; his breathing halted for a moment at that. “I said it was an accident! What the fuck do you want me to do?” You choked out, throwing your hands up.
Rafe continued to ignore you, slightly laughing at something on his phone; he wanted you to feel as guilty as possible, and he knew making you sit in silence and think about what you did would be the best way to achieve that, so he had to be strong. He wanted so badly to respond and put you in your place, but he also knew you would prefer that to this.
“Rafe!” you shouted, wanting so desperately to be heard, but you got no response, not even a look in your direction.
“RAFE!” You repeated even louder this time, but still, he kept eye contact with his phone and ignored you; it made you so angry and sad, so many emotions you didn't want to feel. This was the fucking worst.
“I fucking can't.” You cried, tears blurring your vision as you left Rafe's room, slamming the door behind you as you made your way to the balcony. You grabbed your chest, trying to slow your fast and deep breathing, but you couldn't. Rafe was treating you like shit, and it was so frustrating.
The blonde didn't stop you from leaving his room; he knew your little routine and that you would return to his bed in at least ten minutes.
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚⋆
The following day, you woke up to muffled yelling from outside Rafe's bedroom door; you didn't even remember falling asleep or returning to his room last night; your last memory was bawling on the balcony as the smell of your cigarette filled your nose.
You sat up in bed, rubbing your eyes, noticing the pounding sensation throughout your head. You drank way too much last night, you thought to yourself before being brought back to reality by the muffled voices behind the door. Their voices were tense, filled with bitterness, and you couldn't help but feel a twitch of worry knotting in your stomach.
You glanced around the room, searching for clues or signs of what might have sparked the disagreement, but it was nothing new for Rafe to get into it with literally anyone.
The morning light filtered in through the curtains, casting a soft glow over your familiar surroundings, but your attention remained fixed on the heated exchange just beyond the door. But before you could even form another thought, Rafe's bedroom door swung open and slammed closed behind him as he breathed in and out fast and placed his hands on his head.
You exited his bed, swinging your feet out from under his blankets before standing up and walking over to him. You just wanted to comfort him and try to make him feel better. Even though you and Rafe didn't necessarily get along all the time, he's still your boyfriend, and you didn't enjoy seeing someone you love so upset.
“Rafe.” you calmly mumbled, touching his back. “Calm down,” you said, rubbing it. You could tell he was still distraught by how he was breathing.
His breath was rapid, his jaw clenched, and his first balled to his side.
“Take some deep breaths.” you calmly mutter, still trying to calm him down, but you knew you had triggered something in him when you saw the way he turned to you, eyes narrowed and dark; you didn't understand why what you said upset him, but you knew that all his anger would now be directed towards you.
“Calm down?” Rafe repeated, tone harsh and aggressive. “Deep breaths?” he hissed, taking a step closer to you as you took one back.
“Do you hear yourself?” The kook tapped on his temples as he stared you down, jaw clenched as he leaned on his dresser.
“You sound just like Sarah.” he tisked as he crossed his arms.
You didn't know what to say, but at this point, you were on the other side of the room; you knew you were playing a dangerous game, even being in the same room as Rafe when he got like this.
“Well, what do you want me to do, Rafe? I-” You looked down before being cut off by the sound of glass hitting the floor after your boyfriend knocked over serval objects that were sitting on top of his dresser in one clean sweep.
You flinched, closing your eyes as the abrupt noise of objects breaking filled your ears. You were grateful he took his anger out on his random trinkets rather than you, but you couldn’t stop your breath from speeding up as you held your chest, trying to lower your anxiety.
“I want you to be fucking quiet for once.” Rafe fumed angrily, now stalking towards you. “I want you to stop getting shitfaced just to embarrass me.” he spat, referring to last night.
As he stalked towards you, you made a run for it, successfully reaching the other side of the room, but this pissed him off even more you could see the way his jaw clenched even from where you were standing.
“Yeah, because the whole world revolves around Rafe!” you sarcastically nodded with a fake smile. He was fucking delusional if he thought you would purposely get drunk just to fall asleep on another man and embarrass him.
He rolled his eyes in response, jaw ticking again.
“I'm at least happy you got your anger out on someone other than me last ni-” Your words were cut off by empty glass being thrown directly at your face; luckily, you dodged it, falling to the floor and covering your head immediately.
Thankfully, the glass was thick enough that it didn’t break. What the fuck. If that would have hit your face, Rafe could have fucking killed you. You didn't know how you went from trying to comfort your boyfriend to almost being killed by him so fast. He was so unpredictable it was scary, and since you were so lost in thought, you didn't realize he was now right in front of you.
“You know why I hurt you, don't you?” Rafe questioned, voice now calm… scarily calm as he kneeled in front of you, brushing a hand over your hair.
You didn't respond; you were shaking and now crying. You were too terrified to even look up at him, too scared of what was coming next.
“Look at me.” Rafe sneered before tightening his once soft grip on your hair and using it to pull your head back and make eye contact.
You groaned at the feeling, more tears falling from your face as the pain intensified every second. You regretted even trying to make him feel better in the first place. Fuck, you regretted even meeting him.
“You know why I hurt you, don't you?” Rafe questioned again. This time, his voice was harsher, and his eyes grew darker the longer you didn't respond, but you didn't care you weren't answering that stupid fucking question; Rafe had no excuse to hurt you no matter what you did, and you weren't about to validate his reasoning.
“This is exactly why.” Rafe scolded, grabbing more hair as his grip tightened further. You screamed out in pain, but he quickly covered your mouth with his other hand as he continued. “You’re disrespectful.” he critiqued as he spoke through his teeth.
You were sobbing into his hand, tears soaking his fingers as he looked down at you with a storm brewing in his eyes. Rafe wanted to hurt you; Your boyfriend wanted you to feel exactly how he did when he entered his room in the first place.
“You’re kinda pathetic, you know.” Rafe looked you up and down, grip still tight on your hair.
“You're already crying, and I barely even touched you yet.”
༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶
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save your love
synopsis: y/n is susie in allie x & mitski's susie save your love song - if u dont know it go listen :P (but also u dont have to lol synopsis is y/n calls bsf sana drunk and sad and angry abt her bf and you don't know that sana is in love with you)
warnings: cursing, sexual harassment, alcohol, slight cheating, gonn repeat sexual harassment bcs its there and its potentially triggering so err on the side of caution and dont read if ur worried - take care🙏
w/c: 3.7k
a/n: still not over the fact that sana used susie save your love in that one ig post like wdym ur a mitski - qpoc ICON - listener and u post a song abt how u wish ur bsf would leave her dumb bf and be w u instead - a quintessential wlw experience like HELLO???? i also think i projected a liiiiiiil bit accidentally maybe im so sorry but writing this shit works better than therapy ngl
࿐ ࿔*: ☽･ﾟ
"y/n where the fuck are you."
you're cursing as you almost drop your drink, phone between your ear and shoulder.
"i dunnoooo one of marshall's friends' places i think. he was supposed to be my ride home but i can't find himmmmmm."
sana's already got her keys in her hand, heading out towards her car, cursing under her breath, "can you share your location with me sweetie? or is there anyone else there that you know?"
you look around at the various stragglers in the living room either smoking, high out of their minds, or completely passed out. loud music, bass thumping hurting your head as you feel the vibrations shoot up your body. "mmmmm noooo but-"
"hey! marshall's girl right?" a deep voice comes over the phone and sana squints to try and make out what's going on, unlocking her car and turning her engine on.
"y/n? hey y/n you still there?"
"mm yeah sana sorry one sec- you guys know where marshall is?"
"think i saw him headed home with someone in the passenger seat, thought that was you cutie."
"someone else? huh?"
"you doing okay? you look a little pale let's get you upstairs in the bathroom yeah?"
"w-wait no-" sana can make out multiple voices talking to you and a little scuffle as you drop your phone, voices fading.
"fuck!" she's about to call your boyfriend marshall and demand for your address when she sees you were able to start sharing your location with her. she sets it into her navigation app and starts speeding to the destination.
࿐ ࿔*: ☽･ﾟ
"umm guys where are we going? i don't think marshall's up here..."
"oh don't worry babygirl. marshall's our best friend he's okay with whatever we wanna do."
"mm okay but like- what are we doing? if we're singing you guys have to know i suck at karaoke so don't laugh."
the three guys holding you up laugh, "nah nah baby we're just gonna get you cleaned up a little before marshall comes to pick you up okay?"
"oh okay~ mmm wait where's my phone? i was just talking to my best friend-" you start to fumble for your pockets while the guys lead you into a dim room.
they shut the door and close in on you, you’re still cluelessly looking for your phone when one guy starts kissing you, shoving his tongue into your mouth.
"w-wait! what are you doing?!"
he's pushing you onto a bed and climbing on top of you kissing your neck while the others slip your top off and unbutton your jeans. "shhh we're just cleaning you up like we said. want you to be nice and ready for marshall right?"
"no what-"
the door slams open and sana's there, breathing heavily from clambering over the steps.
"get the fuck away from her."
the guys exchange annoyed looks when the one who was at your jeans stands up and walks towards sana, "you the best friend? you're welcome to join us if you'd like." he's pulling on her hand and dragging her towards you.
she doesn't give him another second, yanking him back and bringing a knee up into his crotch, letting him fall to the side groaning as she rushes towards you.
you realise belatedly she's got her phone out and the flashlight on as you squint, trying to make out her face.
"get the fuck off her right fucking now. i've got all you shits on camera and the cops on speed dial."
the two guys glance at each other, looking like they want to pull a fight but then they're cursing and moving away, picking up their friend off the floor and stumbling out the door.
her flashlight turns off, and you feel her tugging your clothes back into place before lifting you bridal-style and carrying you out, down the stairs, and into the passenger seat of her car.
you watch hazily as she paces around outside for a few minutes on the phone with someone, stopping to snap a picture of the house and then hanging up and getting into the car, slamming the door close.
you flinch at the sound, shrinking into your seat, pulling the jacket she's draped over you closer.
she starts the engine and pulls out wordlessly.
you don't dare speak yet, letting the soft hum of the engine and the late night radio music fill the silence as you listen to her heavy breaths slow down.
finally she sighs and glances over at you, "what would you have done if i didn't show up y/n?" her voice is gentle, it always was with you.
you can't look at her, tears welling up in your eyes as you stare out the window, shrugging in response.
she's frowning, "did they manage to do anything to you? are you okay? do we need to get you to a hospital?"
you're shaking your head, the movement making you dizzy, feeling gross in your own skin as you pick at your nails. "can you take me to marshall's? i don't wanna talk about this right now." you're voice is croaky when you speak, on the verge of tears.
sana grips the wheel hard at your request, instead, pulling over on the side of the empty road and putting the car in park.
you sigh exasperatedly, "sana please i just said i don't want to talk about this right now."
"that's fine but if you think i'm taking you to that asshole's house then you've got to be fucking kidding me y/n."
you turn your head to look at her then, her eyes are dark with barely concealed rage, fists clenched so tight her knuckles were turning white. you falter under her gaze, "he's not an asshole."
she scoffs then, "are you fucking serious? what kinda boyfriend takes you to his rapist friends' house then leaves with another girl without so much as a text. it should be enough proof he’s a dick that he's even friends with those assholes." she spits.
and you can't help it, you start sobbing uncontrollably.
"oh shit y/n i didn't- i'm sorry-" she's shuffling around trying to get around the console, and you sob even louder at her outstretched hand, careful and wanting to comfort you but making sure you were okay being touched first.
you're diving into her arms and then she's all there. pulling you into her lap and adjusting the position of her seat so you can squeeze in between the wheel and her torso. soft hands running through your hair shooshing and whispering gently into you ear. arm wrapped tightly around your waist while your face is buried in her chest, heaving and letting out your disgust.
she never stops running her fingers through your hair, letting your sobs wrack your body, hearts beating in tandem as she just holds you.
eventually, your sobs reside to sniffles and you feel a little silly, rubbing your eyes onto the material of her betty boop pyjama shirt.
she's still combing fingers through you hair, rubbing your back lightly, and laying soft kisses along the side of your face, resting her forehead against the top of your head and breathing you in softly.
"i-i'm-" your voice cracks as you try to speak up weakly but she hushes you quickly.
"we don't have to talk if you don't want to. we can stay here for as long as you want. i'm not going anywhere."
you feel your eyes well up again, but you swallow it down, speaking up after clearing your throat, "i'm sorry-" your voice cracks again, almost breaking, "i'm sorry you had to see me like that."
you feel her lifting her head off yours and looking at you in disbelief, mouth open and about to protest but you put a finger to her lips, still not able to look at her.
"no let me finish. you were right. i had no idea what i'd have done if you didn't come. i'm sorry that you did have to come. i'm just so sorry for fucking up sana. if i'd- if i hadn't got so drunk maybe, or if i'd followed marshall home-"
she licks the finger on her lips and you yelp, looking at her out of reaction and cringing, wiping the finger on her shoulder in faux disgust.
she chuckles, "can i talk yet?"
you nod shyly, "as long as you don't lick me again." avoiding her eyes.
she's smiling and a hand is on your cheek, brushing the skin there gently and you can't help but lean into the touch.
"y/n... you don't have to apologise for anything. i'm sorry if i made you feel like you did. but i don't care about all of that. i'm just grateful i was there, if anything, i'm angry at myself for not being there sooner." you look at her as she takes a shaky breath in, eyes wet, "but you have to know none of that was your fault. there's no what if. it was no one's fault but the guys who decided to take advantage of you while you were drunk."
you're crying again, head in your hands, "n-no but- like i know that but i just- like i trusted them. i trusted them because they were meant to be marshall's friends and i trusted marshall."
she's rubbing her hands at your lower back, "that doesn't make it your fault for trusting them. they broke that trust the moment they started thinking of you in a way they shouldn't have. you can't blame yourself for something like that y/n."
"i just feel so gross sana. i can't stop thinking about how their hands felt on me, and i want to scrub off every bit of them."
she's clutching your waist, anger building up again, "i'll fucking kill them."
you let out a choked laugh, "yeah? you and your 163 centimetres? against three buff gym rats?" you poke the skin at her arms, "with these muscles i assume?" (it was SO funny and adorable in the ready to be tw-log finale ep when jeongyeon was poking at sana saying how she has zero arm muscles)
she's pulling away from you with a pout and a whine on her lips before her gaze darkens and she says somberly, "i have a car."
you laugh seriously then, a big hearty laugh as your head falls to her shoulder, and she's whining and trying to pull you up. you're so grateful for her.
eventually you come up, wiping at your eyes and catching your breath, "well i'm glad i have someone who'd commit manslaughter for me."
she's pouting adorably and you get a sudden rush of want, and you blush, scrambling away, wondering why the fuck you just thought about how easy it'd be to kiss the pout off your best friend's lips.
sana's confused and pulling you back into her, "what's wrong? where’re you going?"
you come up with the quickest excuse you can think of, "gonna puke."
she yelps and quickly opens the car door, almost falling out in her rush to avoid being covered in sick. you're out the door in seconds, heaving in the fresh air and shivering slightly at the cold, hoping it'll at least cool down the heat in your cheeks.
then you're giggling, and then laughing again, turning back to face her look of disgust. her face morphs as she watches you though, and soon enough she's doubled over laughing as well.
to anyone driving past, you'd both look insane, laughing at absolutely nothing. but to you, you've never felt more free, more relieved. you're safe, and okay, and you're favourite person in the whole world is here with you. you collapse onto the hood of her car, and she follows suit, giggling and breathy.
the two of you lay here, looking up into the night sky, counting the stars. you shiver slightly and move closer towards her until your bodies are touching. she's turning slightly, wrapping an arm around your waist loosely, and watching you watch the stars.
you turn to face her, breaths mingling, coming out in wispy white clouds of heat in the chilly night air. you find your eyes dropping to her mouth again, and you can't hide the blush that adorns your face this time. if you'd just leaned in a little more, you'd be able to answer the burning question in your head of what exactly sana tasted like.
the slight quiver in her lower lip entrances you, the soft breaths she's taking as her warmth fans over your face, smelling of jasmine and the toothpaste she’s used just before bed. you're inching closer and closer, her eyes are on your lips as well.
you lose it though, when a tongue peeks out and licks across her bottom lip, and you're pressing your lips against hers softly, eyes closed, and humming at the warmth she provides.
she's kissing you back gently, lips slotting against yours in the perfect way, and then she's gone, pulling away leaving you chasing after her, but she places a hand on your chest, pushing you back lightly.
"you're drunk. and taken. this is wrong."
you whine, trying to pull her back to you but she's firm, sitting up and walking away.
you're blinking and what the fuck just happened? dazed as you stand up as well, moving back into the passenger seat dumbly, peeking at her expression trying to get a sense of what was going on inside her mind.
she starts the engine and pulls out from the kerb, staring straight ahead, giving you nothing.
you can't help but think you've fucked everything up again.
࿐ ࿔*: ☽･ﾟ
the storm brewing inside your head doesn't stop when she pulls into your driveway and parks.
you muster up the courage to apologise but she beats you to it, "i'm sorry y/n. i shouldn't have done that. can we just forget it about it please? i don't want to ruin anything between us. you're the most important person in the world to me and i can't lose you over these stupid feelings and i'm so sorry if i made you feel uncomfortable at all i-"
your inebriated mind is playing catch up, rolling her words in your head over and over again trying to figure out why that sounded like she was saying she had feelings for you? that couldn't be right. sana was the it girl. she was the girl that everyone wanted. she was the girl that sat through your nerdy rants about space and eels. the girl that bought you ice cream when your first boyfriend broke up with you in grade 3 because he didn't like the way you cut your hair. the girl that cried when she found out you weren't going to the same high school because you were moving away, but then managed to get her parents to enroll her anyway and spent the next 6 years taking the 2 hour commute to school just to be with you.
and holy shit. sana was in love with you.
"sana..." you interrupted her rambling, "i... i kinda have a massive headache right now and i'm more than a little drunk but… this isn't going to change our friendship at all."
her eyes are wide and shining, looking at you in fear, you grab her hands and squeeze them over the console, "i promise i'm not leaving you but i don't want to give you an answer yet when i'm in this state. but if it helps, i'm pretty sure i'm the one that kissed you first." you grin, and she lets out a shaky breath.
you let go of her hands and shyly rub the back of your neck, "i kinda need to get inside and get clean but i'll call you tomorrow if that's okay?"
she's nodding, wiping at her eyes hastily.
you open the door and step out, closing it softly behind you. but you lean back down and gesture for her to roll down the window which she does.
"and sana... thank you for tonight. seriously. i don't know how i can ever show you how grateful i am for you being there."
she purses her lip and is firm again, "stop it. i'm glad i was there. and thankyou for letting me be there for you."
you smile gently as you wave and head towards your door, she waits for you to get inside and the door to shut before she pulls out and drives home, heart thumping, thoughts messy.
࿐ ࿔*: ☽･ﾟ
you wake up in the morning with a pounding headache, stumbling to your kitchen to pop a few painkillers and squinting as you adjust to the morning sunlight spilling through your windows.
thank god you remembered everything that happened last night, you set your lips in a line as you got ready. you had a strict plan for today, and nothing was going to ruin it.
you quickly get dressed, thumbing out a small letter and grab your keys, driving over to marshall's house was step one.
once you arrive, you slam your car door loudly, taking satisfaction in the fact it probably woke him in his self-induced hangover he was no doubt soothing. you stalk up his front door, rapping on the wood loudly and tapping your foot impatiently as you wait for him to open the door.
it's not him though, and you scoff at the sight of a half naked girl, probably barely legal, pushing her aside despite her weak protests, and letting yourself into the space.
you storm up to his room, flinging open the door, grabbing the vase next to the bed, and dumping the water all over his sleeping head.
he wakes up with a start, "WHAT THE FUC-"
you slap him across the face, bringing his attention to you, "we're done." two simple words and you're back out the door, going down the steps, and back into your car.
you're halfway down the street when you spot him in the rearview mirror clambering after you in his underwear, soaking and pathetic.
you can't believe you had stayed with that man for as long as you had.
the relief you feel after your first action of the day is freeing. you're chasing after the feeling you had last night when you were doubled over laughing like madmen with sana on the side of the road. adrenaline pumping as you pull up to your local florist, purchasing a big bouquet of pink hydrangeas and then grabbing 2 coffees and a few bakery goods, shoving everything back into your car and speeding away again.
you arrive at sana's front door in record time, knowing her, she was definitely awake already and probably anxiously waiting for you to call. you grin as you grab the flowers, the letter you wrote before you left the house, and the breakfast you've gotten for the both of you, placing it down on her front door mat and arranging everything nicely so it looked picture-worthy.
then you ring her doorbell and duck, running over to her side fence that you knew she always left unlocked, entering her house through the back door, and sneaking back towards the front.
sana's bent down over the flowers and you can see the slight crease between her eyebrows from her confusion as she reads the letter you've left in the middle of the hydrangeas.
i'm sure you don't need me to tell you what pink hydrangeas represent because you're a huge flower nerd and i love that about you but i'm going to write it out anyway to show you i did the research.
in japan, hydrangeas are used to show you're sorry. and i'm sorry for not realising sooner, for letting you suffer for so long on your own. they also represent heartfelt emotions and gratitude. i'm eternally grateful for you sana. you're the most important person in the whole world to me too. i'd also commit manslaughter for you.
in europe, hydrangeas mean vanity and arrogance. i'm sorry i was so self-involved with my stupid boyfriends. to tell you the truth, i always thought you were too good for me, and that you'd realise that one day and leave, so i clung to anyone i could find, waiting in fear of that day. that was selfish of me, and i see that now, because you could never leave someone you love. because i realised i feel the same way about you, and i could never, never leave you.
pink hydrangeas are the most romantic of the bunch. (they’re also your favourite colour) i'm obviously trying to tell you that i love you too in a more than platonic way. and this time i'm not drunk or hyperemotional, i'm certain.
you silently creep up behind her while she's reading your note, and then grab her waist lifting her up into the air as she squeals, turning her in your arms and planting your lips on hers.
she's caught by surprise, lips unmoving against yours, until she realises it's you and wraps her legs around your waist, arms around your neck, and kisses you back.
you can finally taste her. and there's no way to describe it. you don't know why it took you so long to realise your feelings for her, but you'd never felt the way you feel about her for anyone else. you'd chalked that up to being best friends and that that's the way all best friends feel about each other, but best friends don't sigh into kisses. best friends don't feel like their hearts would explode with each soft press of skin against each other. best friends don't love each other the way you loved sana.
you break away when you feel wetness glide along your cheek, and salt touch the tip of your tongue.
"sana?! oh my god i'm so sorry, i shouldn't- i should've asked first- oh shit i'm so-"
she's chuckling brokenly and you can't tell if she's laughing or crying or both but she pulls you back in, melding your lips together again speaking against your mouth, "i'm sorry. i'm just so happy right now."
you smile against her, kissing her again, you think you'll never be able to get enough of this feeling. "i'm sorry it took so long for me to catch up."
you feel her laugh against you, "i'm just glad you've still got some love saved for me."
"always." kiss. "it's all for you from now. i love you."
"i love you too idiot."
#sana#minatozaki sana#twice sana#sana x reader#sana x f!reader#sana x fem!reader#sana imagines#twice x reader#twice imagines#royaltozaki
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A FOOL'S GAME
summary - an angsty drabble of fem reader leaving an emotionally troubled ellie
warnings - angsty arguing, strong language, mentions of infidelity, sad feelings
word count - 1.4k
credits: divider credit, gif credit
a/n: written with "a pearl" by mitski in mind. def listen on replay while reading!
"If you told me that this would be the way we'd end up..." you started. But your breath caught itself on the painful lump in your throat. You began to laugh in disbelief, mostly to shake off the urge to cry. "I would have never believed you."
She couldn't help but avert her gaze. So much so, that you secretly wondered if she felt she'd turn to stone if she met your eyes. Maybe in some way, she would. She was embarrassed. Cheeks pink, ears red, jaw clenched with tension. She leaned against her desk, arms crossed, frozen almost. Eyes glued to the floor.
"And here we are. You don't want to touch me... You can't even fucking look at me."
Despite your words, Ellie remained unmoved. You began to wonder if her silence meant that she actually felt guilty, or whether it was just indignation. You knew she had a bad habit of never admitting when she was wrong.
"I never meant to hurt you," Ellie broke the silence, embarrassment in her voice, with her eyes now stuck on her busted sneakers. "I wasn't thinking and I wish I-"
"You don't get to say that," you cut her off, nearly scolding her. Her green eyes finally flew up to meet yours, and your heart sank to your stomach. "You don't get to tell me you didn't mean to hurt me and go do what you did."
"They were stupid, shitty mistakes, and I know that, and I'm sorry." Ellie rambled with pleading eyes, almost scrambling to find all the right words to make this go away. She pushed herself off the desk she was leaning on and walked toward you, a gentle hand out to hold your arm. "I don't want... I can't lose you."
A wave of dread washed over you. All you've wanted is for her to love you the way you've loved her. To want you the way you've wanted her. She used to tell you how terrified she was of losing you. But with Ellie looking at you the way she was, you couldn't help but wonder if she was only saying this now just to save her ass. You reluctantly swallowed the thought and let her have her word.
"There's a lot I don't talk about anymore and I'm sorry. Okay? I'm sorry things have been getting worse, and it's not that I don't want you, I just..."
"And you just what?" you scoffed, belittling Ellie's explanation. The disdain in your voice made Ellie furrow her eyebrows, hurt flashing on her features for a fleeting moment. You were almost sorry for saying anything. "All those nights staying up and laughing. You were able to sleep through the night and eat a full meal again. We used to talk about everything and nothing... what the fuck happened to us?"
Silence.
Ellie looked away and out the window at the gentle flurries of snow. She sighed deeply, chewing the inside of cheek with her eyebrows furrowed. She felt it. You were getting tired of her. All the shit she's put you through, and you had finally reached your breaking point. She knew you deserved better, but Ellie was a selfish girl in love. She would never able to tell you to leave - and mean it.
"I don't even feel real anymore."
You had always been almost convinced that if you loved her enough, the pink would return to her cheeks. That maybe, the butterflies she'd feel when her name fell from your lips would quiet the maggots eating her up inside. But even in between stolen kisses and nights spent together, she’d never spare the breath to tell you about the trouble you always knew was brewing beneath the surface. She assumed if she remained in blissful ignorance of her own feelings, it would eventually go away. No tears to be had and regretted.
But she made her own mistakes anyway. You almost didn't feel bad for her anymore.
"So you go out and do this? Instead of talking to me?" you shot back, wishing her the same sadness that sat in your chest and pooled in your eyes. You moved away from the gently placed hand on your arm, spurning any of her affection toward you. "Did it feel real when you fucked her? Was it that good? Just had to keep going back for more? Maybe I'll go fuck someone else, too. How 'bout an ex to make it even?"
Seeing your eyes become glossy and talk about sleeping with an ex stirred self-disgust in Ellie's gut. She felt backed into a corner, forced to see her own reflection. God, she felt pathetic for having put you through it all. But like clockwork, the accountability only went so far before she scornfully projected. Her eyes darkened, and she took a step back to sneer at you.
"You know what? Maybe you should. Cause this shit right here?" she fired back, gesturing to the both of you. "Maybe this was the biggest mistake I've ever fucking made."
The last words that left her mouth struck you breathless. That nasty lump rising higher in your throat stoked the nausea you felt at her words. You could tell that your silence made Ellie itch. The inner corners of your eyebrows were raised and a dejected smile spread across your lips.
"THIS? This was your biggest mistake?" you laughed through your tears incredulously. "I never know what's going on in your head, El. You'd tell me you love me and you don't want to lose me. Kiss me one day and refuse to touch me the next. Find you fucking someone else, and that this hadn't been the first time...and here I am, making more fuckin' excuses for you."
"Then stop making them!" Ellie threw her hands up and then let them down, slapping her thighs in exasperation."Jesus Christ, I said I was sorry! What the fuck else do you want me to say? I fucked up, I know!"
"You don't get it," you whispered bitterly while you shook your head gently, the tears running hot across your cheeks. "I fucking loved you, Ellie. I would've done anything for you... Who was there when Tommy couldn't even bring himself to look at you? When Dina promised you'd never see JJ again? The nights you couldn't sleep, you couldn't eat?"
"I didn't need your fucking help!" Ellie raised her voice over yours, the guilt eating away at her more quickly. "I never asked you to be there, I would've always been fine on my own. I never fucking needed you."
"...Got it." You nodded sarcastically, wiping the tears from your eyes and cheeks, snatching your backpack off of Ellie's couch. "All the hurt I put myself through to make sure you were okay? I guess that's my fault, huh?"
Ellie's heart quickened watching you grab your belongings to leave. But she stood there frozen and powerless, wanting to make it better but also wanting it all to be over. How did she manage to fuck this up so badly? She knew in the next minute or so, she'd have to watch you walk out of that door and never come back.
"You're so terrified of losing me, right?" You said whilst rummaging through a pocket of your backpack and pulling out a small black journal. It was a journal she'd given you full of just little sketches and doodles - some of you, some of you both together, some of silly things.
"Y/N. Don't. Please, let me just-"
You chucked the book at Ellie, who couldn't meet your eyes again but drew closer to you in an attempt to keep you from leaving. The book struck the side of her chest but like a brick wall, she remained there, shamefully gnawing the inside of her mouth, a strand of her auburn hair falling into her face. If you had stared at her long enough, you'd notice the tears she'd been trying to blink away.
"Fuck you, Ellie. You did this shit to yourself."
Her front door slammed behind you as you stormed out and stepped off her porch. The feeling of the frozen wind stinging your cheeks and rustling your hair was almost pleasant. Well, what now?
You said what you had to say. But the pit in your stomach only grew heavier, and you felt sick. Somehow you knew.
You knew that no matter how many times you leave, how many times she hurt you, you would always love her, like a fucking fool.
Maybe it was never truly better to have loved and lost. Maybe you would've been better off if you had never loved at all.
#yall be kind now 😭#first time writing as ellie :0#apologies in advance for all the angst#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams angst#ellie williams x y/n#ellie williams x female reader#writings#ellie x y/n#ellie x fem reader#ellie williams x you#ellie williams
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eyeless jack dating headcanons pls :)
𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐄𝐲𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬*ೃ༄
: ̗̀➛Back to source
He broke into your apartment with the intentions of harvesting your organs.
When he held the scalpel to your hip, and you began to stir awake. Mf froze.
Oh shit.
“What the fuck?”
Now bro only kills to eat, and when he does, he make sure it’s as painless for the victim as possible (unless he’s in a frenzy).
And That so called victim being awake? That just makes it 100x harder to get the task done.
And when you wake up to see a 6’6 man with an oddly terrifying blue mask holding a scalpel to your hip?
You (rightfully) freak tf out.
He’s not a sadist like some ppl… (cough Jeff Cough) So he probably awkwardly retreated back out to your window.
Anywayssss.
To the actual dating headcanons now.
You guys probably had a longgggggg ass slow burn. (not the only thing that’s long…)
The two of you definitely acted like a couple, before you were ACTUALLY a couple iykwim.
You find it so cool that your bfs a demon. He doesn’t really understand your excitement about it, since it’s literally a curse for him.
This boy is a walking furnace, he’s so cozy. So lots of winter cuddle sessions. Also perfect for when you on your period.
He purrs in his sleep. You can’t change my mind. You guys be cuddling on the couch all cute n’ shit and then there’s this soft buzzing sound… You crack open your eyes to look at him. His head on your lap as he naps.
“Babe… Are you purring?”
You asked with the biggest grin ever.
“…No.”
He likes when you read to him, he struggles to see (ik ik, he’s eyeless n shit, but I like to think he can still see, it’s js rlly rlly blurry or he has that heat vision where he can see body temps.) So when you can’t read to him, he just listens to audio books.
He’s a gentle giant towards you, y’all literally so cute. AND A GENTLEMAN🤭 he’s the whole damn package (minus the whole… cannibal eating ppl thing.)
He has animalistic like senses. So he can hear, and smell very well. So he can smell when you change your perfume or shampoo.
Imagine him leaning down to hug you (since you’re prob shorter than this tall ahh mf, nah seriously use the Hikaku sitatter site) and his face is buried in the crook of your neck. He’ll say shit like-
“Did you change you’re perfume to Miss Dior Eau De Parfum 30ml?”
“Wha-“
When he started getting comfortable taking his mask off around you, everytime he does you call him ‘Pretty boy’ 🤭.
HE WILL FOLD. Partially bcs he likes getting praised. Partially bcs he’s not a fan of the whole demon look.
His morning voice is literally so sexy help. Frothing at the mouth, on my knees barking.
Yk when you have like a sore head, and then you ask Google what’s up and Google’s all like ‘lol bitch you’re gonna die.’ You ask him about it obviously freaked out and he had to reassure your fine.
Walks in the rain at like 4am.
Every time he sees you, he’ll give you a quick forehead kiss.
Pls pls pls pls pls pls pls, I’m begging you. On my knees and begging for you to not look inside his mini fridge he has sitting in your storage room. Thank u.
He’s got some pretty gnarly things in there. Just be thankful he has the decency to not cross contaminate that shit with your food.
You guys slow dance in the kitchen to Mitski. He spins you around and all that cute shit.
He’s overprotective of you, and when you do get him to come out in public with you, he will growl at anyone that gets a little too close for his likings.
Wearing his hoodie<3. It just makes his dead heart happy.
SASSY MAN APOCALYPSE‼️💯💥
He may seem all quiet and sweet. But he’s sassy af. This. Dude. Has. Attitude.
When you’re telling him to do something in a tone, he’ll mouth you’re words with his hands.
When you guys are cuddling in your bed at night, he’ll randomly nibble on your neck to shoulder. He has sharp ass teeth so it’s a bit nippy, but he makes sure to be extra careful to not draw blood.
He smothers you when you’re under the weather. He’s literally so sweet omfg.
When you guys argue which is like 10% of the time, it takes awhile for him to get agitated. But even when he does he will NEVER raise his hands to you. Other than that he keeps calm.
He will though, get a bit mean, he probably doesn’t mean what he says it’s just a defence mechanism.
He makes it up to you with a cute little gift basket (he stole it.)
Y’all have probably kissed, and he still had the taste of blood in his mouth from eating someone’s kidneys<3
He can’t steal your organs but he can deffo rearrange them ;)
✯.★*°•.°✯•.★*°°·.•°★•✯.★*°•.°✯•.★*°°·.•°★•
#creepypasta x reader#eyeless jack#eyeless jack x reader#eyeless jack x y/n#eyeless Jack headcanon#creepypasta reader#creepypasta headcanon#creepy pasta x reader hc#creepypasta#creepypasta hcs#creepypasta x female reader#creepypasta x you#eyeless jack headcanon
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╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗
sanrio!oc & boxer!jk headcannon
╚══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╝
⤷ ⊹₊⋆ series masterlist ⊹₊⋆
>pics from pinterest<
—warning: some mature contents, read at your own risk—
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ᡣ𐭩 y/n l/n, 19
ʚɞ lives in a tiny/luxurious apartment nearby the lake
ʚɞ works at a bubble tea store. you love being in a minimalistic and cute place. indeed you think you’re just a girl and your world is full of sanrio and cute stuff.
ʚɞ currently studying cosmetology. you dont know what you want to do just yet but you’re trying to figure it out. you love doing your own makeup, nails, and eyelashes. anything that makes you feel that feminine energy you’ll do it. that’s the reason why you’re pursuing something that’s related to your very own interest!
ʚɞ obsessed with hello kitty. you just has to collect at least one every week so you can function properly
ʚɞ has daddy’s issue (just like the author)
ʚɞ friendly to everyone but you have 3 real friends who you know really well. you open up to them about some details of you and jungkook’s relationship. there’s always there to give you advice or just listen to your rants
ʚɞ you’re very affectionate and genuinely loves the people in your life + sensitive: cry yourself to sleep when someone yells at you. how dare they
ʚɞ had multiple sugar daddies prior to entering a relationship with jk
ʚɞ your go-to outfits are mini skirts+black platform boots/mary janes + crop tops
ʚɞ dumb and slow as a turtle. you just never get what’s going on most of the time & that’s why guys get to take advantage of you and your dummy self won’t even realize it.
ʚɞ may look innocent but be the freakiest in the bedroom. 100% certified virgin (just for the first 6 months of her and jk’s relationship) but that doesn’t mean you can’t own multiple toys + toys that jk gifted you.
ʚɞ unintentionally and intentionally tease jk. you just likes seeing all worked up for nothing.. or something
ʚɞ sucker for creampie & cockwarming
ʚɞ listen to kali uchis, lana del rey, mitski, etc.
⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆
<pics from pinterest>
ᡣ𐭩 Jeongguk Jeon, 23
ꕤ born from a wealthy family. he rebels against his parents: they wanted him to be the heir of their business, but jungkook said “fuck that imma do my own thing”
ꕤ was an underground boxer at the age of 20, but because of his skills, he became somewhat popular in mainstream boxing.
ꕤ has lots of boxing competition [i think he likes to fight]
ꕤ has anger issues. especially when he sees men taking advantage of you. boxing helps him to let out all the anger and he’s learning how to be better. [ you can fix him ]
ꕤ nonchalant but possessive? he doesn’t like to share
ꕤ lives on his own for some time now, in a huge penthouse. he gets lonely most of the time, he’s used to it though
ꕤ @ the gym 24/7. he basically lives there.
ꕤ rumor has it that he was a fuckboy? there’s no proof though.. yet. there’s been rumors around and they don’t sound nice.
ꕤ smokes + vapes [oc hates it]
ꕤ has a big dog named Bam, he’s such a good dog to you!
ꕤ always horny, he keeps the videos of you playing with yourself for his personal use
ꕤ has lots of fantasy of you, he’s infatuated then later on will be in love
ꕤ listens to partynextdoor, metro boomin, brent faiyaz, etc.
⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆
#jungkook ff#jungkook fanfiction#jungkook fic#jungkook imagine#jungkook x reader#jungkookxreader#bts jk#jeon jk#jungkook fluff#jungkook smut#jeongguk#headcanon#sanrihoe#boxer au#bts ff#jungkook angst#jeon jungkook#jjk fluff#fluff#bts fluff#bts ffs#jeon jungkoooook#i love him#so silly#x reader#jjk x you
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wine red, tears gold - chapter 1.
king aegon II x baratheon ofc
a 'what if aegon didn't get poisoned and the greens technically won the dance but at what cost' au. basically aegon, alicent, otto and jaehaera are the only greens alive. and larys i guess. someone get rid of this guy.
word count: 4.6k
aegon wasn't as badly injured from Rook's Rest like in canon in this AU, he has a few burn scars near his torso but wasn't crippled / bedridden.
this is for my 100 followers poll. it was supposed to be a oneshot but will be a mini series in 3 or 4 parts. this is my first time writing aegon and it will also be somewhat of a character study.
thank you for 100 followers and everyone who participated in the poll. love <3
thank you @randomdragonfires for beta reading, mwah mwah.
content: smut (specifics below cut), canon typical misogyny, canon typical violence, angst, fluff, arranged marriage, touch-staved aegon, aegon isn't a r*pist in this au but he is still a bad person and has his vices, ofc and aegon need to go to therapy together, justice for jaehaera, awkward sex, kind of a slow burn
its been so long - the living tombstone • nobody - mitski
chapter specific warnings: awkward sex, p in v, virginity loss
Every day felt like a new restraint, a new button added to the collar choking around Aegon’s neck. He had done it– he had freed the realm of the false queen, his half-sister– and lost almost everything to do so. When did it end? When did he get to relax and run the realm as he saw fit, since they so intended to have them at the helm. He wore the conqueror’s crown, wielded his sword and bore his name and yet he couldn’t do as the conqueror actually did. Rule. He felt more like a dog than a dragon these days; but that was just a pattern in his life. They wanted him when they needed him and he was to shoulder their burdens as eldest son.
His grandsire kept breathing down his neck to secure another wife, another heir, another alliance brokered with another pompous house.
“Listen to me, Aegon,” Otto began, his fingers laced together as he sat at his desk. He had summoned Aegon to the Tower of the Hand– he was summoning the King, rather than the King summoning him. Somehow, his council had let Otto weasel his way back into the position of Hand, Aegon’s mother in tears, pleading for it. There wasn’t anyone else fit for the job since Criston had died– and he was never really fit for it anyhow. “We must move quickly to provide you with a new wife. The realm won’t remain stable if we tarry in producing an heir for the throne.”
Aegon sat in the seat across from him, feeling more like a child than a King. He twisted the signet ring on his pinky finger. “It’s too soon. It would be an insult to Helaena.” he replied, not looking up at Otto. Helaena had only passed a few moons earlier and the wound was still fresh for all of them. Aegon never loved her like a wife– how could he, they were too different, too young– but he cared deeply for her as his sister and the mother of his children. Even thinking about taking another wife this soon felt like a betrayal. He would be like his father then.
A small huff and a rustling of papers was heard– Aegon was still too distracted by his signet ring, the thin light filtering through the half drawn blinds, causing a small glint off of the bronzed metal. He didn’t want to look up to see the expression on his grandsire’s face, he knew it was one of disappointment. Aegon couldn’t remember the last time that someone hadn’t looked at him with contempt, disappointment, melancholy.
“You must understand. You have a duty to the realm–”
“Fucking duty– don’t speak to me of it. I’ve done my duty for enough lifetimes. I let you put me on the throne and usurp my sister and look where that’s gotten us? Everyone is fucking dead, Otto. Jaehaerys, Maelor, Helaena, Aemond,” he paused for a moment, lifting his head up to meet the Hand’s gaze head on, “Rhaenyra, Rhaenys, Jacaerys, Lucerys, Joffrey– do I need to proceed? The majority of our bloodline is wiped out because of you and your ambition.”
Otto snorted, standing up from his desk slowly. He grabbed a decanter of wine, pouring them both a goblet. “You misunderstand. Everything I’ve done has been… for our family’s legacy– for the realm,” he placed the glass stopped back into the carafe, “Don’t you dare act as if I am not hurting for the loss of family– but war is war, boy. People die. It is unfortunate that… the ones close to us did. But we can’t live with our head in the clouds any longer, there is a realm to run and the crown comes with responsibilities. A wife and heir are one of those paramount responsibilities.”
“I have an heir. I still have one remaining child– Jaehaera is my heir. I deem it.” he spoke quickly, staring at the goblet of wine. He had reduced his intake of alcohol since the war ended– but the need for it was always there, always aching. He suddenly felt parched. Giving Otto a haughty stare, he took a sip from the glass, feeling his muscles instantly relax.
“Don’t be daft– have you so quickly forgotten what happened when the King last named a female heir?”
“It wasn’t that Rhaenyra was a woman, Otto. People would’ve learned to adjust if…” Aegon took another sip, clearing his throat, “If she hadn’t been infatuated with her freak of an uncle, you would’ve been able to control her easier, hm? It's always been you and mother behind the crown these past two decades– not me, nor my father.”
“It’s more complicated than that,” Otto griped back, gripping his glass, “Don’t speak of things you know nothing about. Rhaenyra–” he stopped, taking a breath, “Rhaenyra is dead. They’re all dead, you’re right. But there is still the whole of the Seven Kingdoms requiring a leader, especially now. A leader with a united front with a queen and babe. I won’t argue further on this matter.”
Aegon acquiesced. He would rather deal with Otto’s venomous viper tongue talking him into things he didn’t want to do now instead of his mother visiting him hours later in hysterics– he couldn’t bear it. Alicent was more of a mess now than ever. “Fine. I leave this in your very capable hands,” he stood up, swiping the whole jug of wine, “At least find me a pretty one.”
–
She was plain, unbelievably plain. Long, curled brown hair desperately in need of a trim, a poorly tailored dress that needed to be more fitted at the waist, stature too small and unremarkable to stand up to anyone of importance. Oh, and picked cuticles, the spots of red eking out from her nail beds. Mayhaps she and his mother would get along just jolly, then. She was to be his prospective wife and bear him more heirs. He wanted to shove it back in the council’s face and say he has an heir, his only living child, Jaehaera. Melancholy and withdrawn as she was, she was his heir.
The council disagreed, allowing Borros Baratheon to shove his last unwed daughter at him like a piece of meat that no one wanted.
Her eyes wafted up to glance at him, every move of hers uncertain, cautious. She was so deathly aware of each minute gesture, her posture having to be adjusted to straighten every few minutes.
Lyanna Baratheon wasn’t of prominent knowledge and reputation like her sisters, aptly named ‘the Four Storms’ – she didn’t remind Aegon at all of a stag or a doe, but rather something more diminutive and easily killed, like a prey animal. Mayhaps a rabbit– it would be an apt description, as she had giant eyes, brown –almost black– in their hue, a shiny glaze over them as she stared at the ground. Every so often, their eyes would meet, brown to violet, and she would look apt as Aegon thought she was.
A rabbit begging for its life.
Borros Baratheon stood beside her, murmuring something into her ear. He was a boorish oaf of a man who couldn’t even read– Aegon wasn’t the brightest star in the sky when it came to matters of literature, that’d always been his brother’s realm, but atleast he could fucking read. He thought it quite hysterical that his house sigil was that of a Stag when Lord Borros reminded him more of a boar. Mayhaps he should change it.
As he continued to whisper to his daughter, her expression went from sordid to panicked, then back to sordid. She wasn’t very good at masking her emotions– she would need to learn if she were to survive at the Keep. The tips of her fingers twitched slightly and she was obviously holding herself back from tearing into her nail beds.
“Lord Borros,” Aegon broke the tension, “Perhaps I should show your daughter around the gardens while you speak with my grandsire. We have the most beautiful gardens here and I’d imagine that Storm’s End wouldn’t have something quite as grand,” he glazed over Borros’ blank stare, “due to the storms, of course.”
Lord Baratheon adjusted his doublet, which was far too small for him— did the Stormlands not have a proper fucking tailor? — and nodded, “Yes, that would be amicable. It would do some good to familiarize yourself with one another before the wedding in a week’s time.”
Aegon’s throat felt parched. He knew that they were speeding things along but he didn’t anticipate it to be this fast. Grabbing a bottle of wine from a nearby servant, he descended back to Lyanna, intent on whisking her away as quickly as possible. Not because he found her particularly interesting, rather the opposite, but he needed an excuse to get out of the room. The insistent thrum of his pulse in his neck was all too loud. His arm looped under Lyanna’s, “Come, my lady,” he hummed, trying to seem like he was somewhat collected and kingly and not on the edge of chugging the entire carafe of wine and smashing it over the next poor fucker’s head. “To the gardens.”
He practically strung along the poor girl, who hurriedly agreed and tried her best to keep up. “Y-yes, your grace,” she mewled, her feet tapping on the ground at irregular rhythms as she hung onto Aegon’s arm, bouncing against the stone walkway toward the gardens, “King’s Landing is… very beautiful, my king– your subject must be very pleased.”
As they descended the cobbled steps down to the garden, Aegon eyed her warily, “Did your father tell you to say that?”
“N-no, not exactly–”
“He did. Anyone with half of a brain and a working nose knows that this accursed city smells of shit. You shouldn’t lie, my lady. You’re quite bad at it,” he took a small breath as he looked at her expression– the poor thing was on the verge of tears. “You will get better in time,” he continued with a slightly softer tone, “This Keep is full of great liars and you don’t seem… too much like your father. I am sure you will pick up quickly. How old are you?”
“Nineteen, your grace.”
Aegon resisted giving a derisive snort, instead uncorking the wine bottle and tossing the stopper into the grass, “You’re quite young, then,” he took a swig, feeling the bitter tasting liquid coat his mouth, “All the better for heirs. Or so I’m sure that we’ve both been told.”
In truth, some would consider her a bit late in age to be married– but Aegon didn’t care as long as he wasn’t robbing the cradle like his father did to his mother, or Daemon to Rhaenyra. He was twenty-six himself and tried to remember what he was like when he was nineteen; he couldn’t exactly pinpoint an exact memory. It was mostly a blur.
“I am… hopeful to provide you with many healthy heirs, my king,” she replied, her words sounding rehearsed. She is as poor of an actress as she is a liar, then. She paused for a moment, looking at her hands, “I… do not wish to replace the late queen, her grace, Helaena– I merely wish to fulfill my duty to the realm and my family– I am terribly… sorry to hear about Helaena, my king. As well as your prince brothers. War is a terrible thing.”
Aegon blinked profusely a few times. Her words after her pause sounded genuine– mayhaps she is capable of thinking for herself. She seemed… softhearted, even if a bit naive. He regarded the bottle in his hand for a moment, swishing it around. No one had really apologized to him for his losses– the enumerable amount of them he’s gone through these past few years. They all bowed their heads and wouldn’t meet his gaze, as if their blood was all on his hands. Mayhaps it was. He swallowed, his mouth pursed in a thin line, “... War is indeed a terrible thing, my lady.”
They walked for a few hours around the garden, talking about various things. Aegon still found her quite boring and uninteresting to look at– she wasn’t ugly by any means, and could be considered pretty, but she was just so terribly plain that it bored him to tears. Her speech was all faux and he tried to eek out any genuineness to her words through different subjects– all to no avail. It seemed the sore subject of Aegon’s family was the only thing to break her from her carefully crafted script.
Eventually, they parted ways– for the better, he thought. She was a fine match, a fine age, a fine vessel for his seed to produce a royal heir and whatever other innocuous thing his grandsire needed from him.
What a terribly dreadful life he’s let himself sink into.
That night, he drained two bottles of Dornish Red, falling much into the same state of mind he had when he was nineteen. Wandering to the Street of Silk, he whored and drank himself into a state of sloven mania.
In the midst of his drunken ramblings, he wondered if he could ever find someone who would truly love him or if his opportunity had already passed.
–
The wedding followed in the timeline that Borros and Otto had set– as quickly as possible. The council dipped into the coffers to make it happen, it was to be an extravagant event, a new beginning for the realm. Artisans, fine bakers and cooks were all hired to make the wedding a facet, stringing up red, green, yellow and black banners, making dozens of delicate pastries and even cooking six turduckens to line the tables.
It was all lavish and opulent– and Lyanna could not feel more out of place. The past week at the Keep had been a whirlwind of planning, gown fittings, flower picking. Her sisters were there in attendance, speaking up more than she on what to pick. It was fine with her, as she couldn’t bring herself to care for it. The gaudiness of it all made her feel ill.
She had only met with Aegon the one time, the first time. Lyanna felt she made a terrible impression— she was so nervous that day that she’d vomited twice that morning, all while her father screamed at her to get it right, to say exactly as he told her to. For the most part, she had done just that— played the perfect little puppet for him and said all those empty words that meant nothing.
She was meant to see Aegon at least three more times before the wedding, as there were a few dinners arranged between their two families. He had been absent for all, his mother citing that he was unable to attend for various reasons but nothing overtly specific.
Alicent Hightower was a nice lady— she was warm to Lyanna, talking to her at the dinners when no one else had bothered. She was the person who Lyanna felt most comfortable with in the Keep and was grateful that she was to be her good-mother. Alicent was a bit frayed at the ends from the loss of her other children; she was haunted, her eyes constantly red-rimmed and murmuring prayers under her breath.
The morning of the wedding, Lyanna was summoned to Alicent’s solar to get ready.
She knocked on the door, “Your grace— it’s Lyanna.”
“Come in, my dear,” she called out, a maid opening the door to let her in. “How are you feeling this morn?” Alicent was perched on the settee when Lyanna came in, and immediately rushed over to her, taking the young girl’s hands in hers.
“Quite nervous,” Lyanna responded, her hands quivering ever so slightly, even under the warm touch of Alicent. “May I speak plainly, your grace?”
“Of course,” she ushered Lyanna to the loveseat and had the maid pour them both tea, then promptly shooed her out. “It’s just us now, speak your mind, sweetling.”
“I-I am afraid that… Aegon will not like me. I fear I didn’t make a good first impression— he seemed quite bored of me.”
Alicent took a sip of her tea, giving a small sigh. “I will do you the favor of not sugarcoating words and speak plainly like you have done with me. Aegon will not like you,” she pursed her lips into a thin line, twisting the signet ring on her finger, “Aegon is a creature of debauchery and sin— and you are a good, pious girl. You are like oil and water.” her brown eyes met Lyanna’s, her expression softening. The two women had a fast camaraderie, praying together each morning in the Sept. “You… may not love him, or even like him— but there is a duty upon you to fulfill. It is a burden we carry as women, my dear. We are always behest to the men in our lives,” she stopped, her eyes glazing over with a far-away look, “I don’t mean to be discouraging. You are a… good hearted young woman and I believe you can channel that into something positive as the Queen.”
Lyanna felt her stomach quivering at Alicent’s words, her skin flushing. “I… appreciate your plain speech, your grace. I just… do not wish to displease him.”
Alicent’s mouth twitched at each end as if she were mulling something over. “It will be hard to please him, my dear. You are nothing like the women that usually please him,” she wiped a hand down her face, “You remind me so much of myself, Lyanna. Pushed into something you are… ill-suited for. You’re a sweet and kindhearted girl and I don’t wish for you to tear yourself apart on the inside and feel as if you’re not good enough for him– you are, you are too good for him, too pure, too-” Alicent took a measured breath, “You are not what he wants and you never will be, my dear. It will do you well to know that now rather than years later. There is always someone else in their eyes– women like you and I do what we can. I pray you will find things that keep you happy.”
Lyanna picked up her tea cup with trembling hands, taking a sip. There seemed to be more to Alicent’s words than them just being about Aegon– but she didn’t want to push it. Dipping her head, she thanked her good-mother-to-be once more.
–
“Wake up, wake up!” a voice boomed, rousing Aegon from his haze as a carafe of cold water was poured on him. The girl latched to his cock like a leech let out a shrill scream and scrambled away.
“Fucking hell– who the fuck?” Aegon slurred, blinking profusely half a dozen times before his vision came into focus. It was one of the Kingsguard, one more behest to his grandsire than him– and his grandsire, Otto, who had the now empty container of water in hand.
“Wake up, you ingrate,” Otto growled, grabbing his grandson by his collar, hoisting him up onto his feet, smacking his cheek gently. “Your wedding is in two hours and you’re passed out in a whorehouse. You’re the king, for the Seven’s sake– I thought you left this debauchery behind, atleast have your whores at the keep instead of being in these pits of sin.”
“You can put a number of different hats on a bear, you know,” Aegon slumped against the wall, “Many kinds of hats; a hood, a felted dante, a linen coif, a cowl, a straw hat, a jester’s garb– heh, that’d be quite funny–”
“Is there a point to your drunken babbling, Aegon?”
“Yes, ah– you can put many types of hats on a bear and change its look but at the end of the day, its still just a fucking bear,” he straightened out his stained tunic, “Point being– you can stick a crown on my head, put a sword in my hand and put me through a war to keep me on that fucking throne but guess what, grandsire, I am still just a bear at the end of the day.”
Otto stared at him, brow furrowed. “You aren’t a bear, you’re a dragon and a king, so act like it. You are getting married in two hours and you look like a sloven mess. You’re lucky that Borros is as blind for power and recognition as he is or he would take his daughter back to Storm’s End and you’ll be stuck with the next best choice.”
“That boring rube of a girl was my best choice? I must be fucked, then, either way.”
Otto and his Kingsguard dog dragged Aegon back to the keep, and observed while maids scrubbed him clean, red and raw. He was put in a nicely fit green suit, his House cloak strapped to his shoulders. It was a whirlwind of events that led up to the doors of the Sept being opened and Aegon ushered in.
His stomach churned and he felt sixteen again, forced to wed his sister. He remembered being hardly conscious throughout the ceremony, fumbling over his cloak and practically smothering Helaena in it.
He looked down the aisle at Lyanna, who was dressed in a pale yellow dress with long, flowing sleeves. She had a high collar with black lining and antler embroidery all over the garment. It was actually well fitted this time, likely thanks to his mother, and it turned out she actually had a figure, with plush hips and a well-endowed chest. Her brown hair was half up, half down with an assortment of intricate braids– it reminded him of how Rhaenyra used to wear her hair and he wondered who thought to style it like that, and he wondered if he was the only one who noticed.
As he walked down the aisle, he saw his mother in the front row– she was crying, thumbing a pendant in the shape of a Seven Pointed Star.
The ceremony was a blur to him, as he put the cloak over her shoulders and sealed their union with a kiss– a chaste one. She tasted like lavender tea. As he pulled back, he noticed that her eyes were rimmed with tears, and he felt the familiar sting of tears in his own eyes.
The feast was much the same, as he drank himself into a numbing stupor. He only had one moment of clarity, as some of the rowdy guests began to poke and prod at Lyanna, talking about the bedding ceremony. She looked visibly uncomfortable, picking at her nail beds under the table. Something about the sight of her discomfort and pain stirred something in Aegon that he couldn’t name– maybe he was feeling sentimental from the alcohol, but a surge of possessiveness flowed through him. He wasn’t known to be possessive, much the opposite in fact. But the egregious actions of these men pawing at his wife– their fucking queen, mind them– making disgusting insinuations. If she were a whore, it’d be different– but she was so… innocent, so coerced in all of this just as he was, it felt wrong.
Aegon snapped, slamming his cup down, “There won’t be any fucking bedding ceremony,” he growled, “My wife and I will be retiring to our chambers– alone. And if… any one of you lays another paw on her, you will lose it.”
Lyanna stared at Aegon, those huge brown eyes wide. Her lips were parted slightly as he once again strung her along the halls to his– no, their– chambers. She was shaking.
Once in their chambers, he let go of her, uncorking another bottle of wine and taking a swig. “I presume you think that this is where I will fuck you, hm? Stick my prick in you and make an heir and we will all live happily ever after like a child’s storybook.”
Lyanna stared down at her feet. “It… it would be… the duty of husband and wife to consummate–”
“Fuck duty! I’m not going to fuck some weepy eyed maiden because my old fuck grandsire said so. I don’t have need of you in that way.”
Her hands were trembling as she unlaced the back of her dress, her movements autonomous– she was doing what she thought she should be doing in this situation. She began to undress, slipping her gown off and leaving her in her silken shift, which didn’t leave much to the imagination. The sight of her body, soft, stirred something within him for a moment, like a spark trying to ignite kindling.
“We don’t have to do this, Lyanna,” he murmured, using her name for the first time. He put down the wine bottle. “We can wait.”
“N-no! Please, I want to– please,” Lyanna whispered, practically pleading for it, as if she wanted to get it over with. “Please.”
Aegon rubbed a hand down his face. “Get on the bed then. Lie on your stomach.”
She did as she was told, laying flat on the bed on her stomach. She clutched some pillows as a lifeline.
He knew he should warm her up, he knew that they should want to touch one another, he should want to see her face– but he didn’t. He couldn’t bear to look at her face, or touch her for longer than was necessary. He barely shimmied down his trousers before he began poking at her entrance with a half-hard cock, partially trying to give her a moment to get used to the sensations, and partially trying to find where he was supposed to stick it– he knew, of course, he’d fucked his way through King’s Landing and then some, but he hadn’t fucked many maidens, and especially not when he was blind drunk.
Eventually, he hit home and slid into her, his movements slow at first. He could hear her whimpers and knew they weren’t of pleasure. It reminded him of his wedding night with Helaena where they’d both cried– all the memories of that night came flooding back, causing him to falter.
Lyanna looked back at him, her eyes puffy and red, “I-Is it over?”
Aegon swallowed sharply, cringing as he stared at her. The moment of arousal he had– purely from stimulation alone– was gone now, his half-hard erection deflating completely. “Fuck– yes, it’s over.” he didn’t have the heart to tell her that it in fact had hardly started before it was over– and not in the good way. He pulled out of her, taking in a deep breath as he walked to the water basin and soaked a cloth with warm water, offering it to her. “Wipe yourself– it will help with the… pain… and blood.”
She took the cloth, wiping away the remnants of their half-fulfilled consummation. “I-I’m… sorry,” Lyanna whispered, sniffling, “I know I am not what you want.”
His mouth was pulled into a thin line as he turned away. “You’re right. You aren’t.”
They fell into bed next to each other and Aegon’s mind was swimming as he tried to sleep. He didn’t know what he wanted. He never wanted any of this– he just wanted to be a kid again with no responsibilities, with all of his siblings, even Rhaenyra– he would’ve… he would’ve been nicer to all of them, he wouldn’t of picked on Aemond, he would’ve gotten to know Rhaenyra better, he would’ve played with Helaena’s bugs, he would’ve taught Daeron all of the secrets of the castle. He would’ve told his grandsire to fuck off when they were to crown him and had Sunfyre char him to a crisp and given the crown to Rhaenyra.
He would’ve been loved then.
He just wanted to be loved.
#aegon ii targaryen#aegon ii targaryen fanfic#aegon ii targaryen fanfiction#aegon ii targaryen smut#aegon ii targaryen angst#aegon ii targaryen fluff#aegon ii x reader#aegon ii#aemond targaryen#hotd#house of the dragon#my writing#wine red tears gold
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What i think of you based on your favourite Six of Crows character
Matthias Helvar:
You probably read a lot in the fantasy genre and take yourself too seriously (no offense) probably busy daydreaming about profound things and writing poems that you'll eventually delete. You love bleak and gritty stories and you listen to Coldplay, Conan Gray or The Tortured Poets Department. No shade though, you guys are probably great friends with value for loyalty. In summary, i think you're all either really intense and ernest or totally shy and quiet. You're probably heterosexual to be honest.
Nina Zenik:
I think people who's favourite is Nina don't tend to be much like her in real life, but are the type of people that would really want to befriend her. I'd say you're more introverted and quietly friendly, but then you act totally different and comfortable with the right friends. Technically disapproving of gossip, but turn into Regina George if the rumour is juicy enough- secretly judgemental but it all comes out to your best friends. You have a good sense of humour and probably quite a cynical/pessimist mindset overall. I know you like campy films like Legally Blonde and Clueless. Oh, and your favourite subject is definately history.
Inej Ghafta:
If you're drawn to the steady and honest beat of Inej's thoughts, I think you're quite an anxious or scattered person who enjoys how safe and comforting she feels as a character. I'd say you're a sensitive person with a keen eye for colour and art. Your favourite chapters in SOC are definately the backstory and romance chapters. You cry often at films and music and just when you feel bittersweet or happy. You have Hozier, Mitski or Radiohead on your playlists. You're either artsy smart or english smart, there's no way your a science/maths kinda person.
Wylan Van Eck:
This one is split. You're either one of those people that infantalises and simplifies his character and reduces both him and Jesper to their ship and nothing else, OR you're literally the best person ever. If you're the latter, you're probably super empathetic and appreciate depth as well as a good laugh, and i severley doubt you yourself enjoy maths and chemistry despite loving that look for Wylan. I've also never met a Wylan stan who wasn't a HARDCORE fan of SOC in general. You guys are the loudest complainers about Shadow and Bone being cancelled, and honestly, power to you. I bet your room is a bombsite right now too- pick up those dirty clothes, for christ sake.
Kaz Brekker:
All Kaz Brekker fans are somewhat infatuated with him. Your favourite chapters/scenes are absolutely the action and sexual tension scenes. All about high stakes and excitement, and you love to be surprised. That or you have a big thing for the bad boy trope. I think you have "dark achademia" or grunge-ey pinterest boards that don't match your real life style. I also think you think chess and piano are really sexy but play neither yourself. You and your friends probably read terrible Wattpad stories for a joke. Generally, you're somehow relaxed and simultaneously intense as fuck. 70% of you are Queer women/ nb people, other 30% are intensely heterosexual.
Jesper Fahey:
You have Queen on your playlist. Queen or Gorillaz. You're probably a quite casual person who is taken with Jesper's charm and humour, and you appreciate the comedic relief as you don't enjoy too much grit and heavy stuff with no humour breaks. But despite being not the most sensitive person in the world, Jesper's backstory caught you off guard and it HURT. I think you love comedies and action, you're decent at school and you're quite popular with a good circle of friends. A social person. Potential theatre kid, but minor roles/tech, and the only musical you really like is Hamilton lmao. You are generally a funny person, but you've definately experienced that moment where you tell a joke and nobody laughs.
Anybody else:
Non-existent.
OH AND ALSO, KAZ AND WYLAN FANS ARE THE ONES WHO WRITE ALL OF THE FANFICTION
#six of crows#grishaverse#jesper fahey#kaz brekker#wylan hendriks#wylan van eck#nina zenik#matthias helvar#inej ghafa
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tsc thoughts while reading (beware of spoilers) starting with -
david wymack my fucking beloved
also i never rlly liked/cared for thea but her scene with jean and her nickname for him was cute
chapter 3 thoughts:
jeremy being in awe of neil and the foxes is giving me life
fanfics with alvarez in them gonna go crazy now that we actually have a first name for her (and don’t have to invent one)
oh they rich rich (in reference to jeremy’s family butler?!)
jerejean first interaction!!!!
chapter 4:
omg sunshine court mentioned
having the sudden realisation that i can never read fanfics that have jean’s perspective or anything about the how the ravens work, raven!neil/aftermath of the kings men in the same way again
my neighbours are having a party and while i’m loving the music and absolutely jealous i’m not there, it’s really distracting me from reading
ngl i rlly miss neil and andrew and the foxes please let me see my family soon
‘ what you hold onto is less important than the act of holding on itself’ nora sakavic shut the fuck up you philosophical genius i’m gonna cry this is so real to me
renee i love u
WIT WTF JEAN IS NINETEEN I DIDNT KNOW THAT OH MY GOD BABY HE JOINED THE RAVEN LINEUP AT SIXTEEN WTF
i’m drinking red wine while reading and i think that’s appropriate… also i’m listening to that jean moreau playlist someone made and it’s mega depressing https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5zlPt63Ap0AjJQ1Ff5OKrd?si=75oEzLE8SO-bfJwewM8Evw&pi=a-ge04jIlVTJGY
this is so funny to only me but i’ve been hyperfixating on one direction again and zayn just dropped new music so everytime i read about jean’s raven roomate zane i think of one direction and confused myself a bit about what fandom i’m reading rn
fuck riko u sick fucking fuck u put jean into a box with a singular hole for air and left him to die u fucking cunt
KEVIN ASKING JEAN TO PROMISE NOT TO KILL HIMSELF AFTER NORA WROTE COUNTLESS DRAFTS IN WHICH JEAN KILLED HIMSELF WHILE ON THE PHONE TO KEVIN AND THE ONLY TIME SHE DIDNT KILL JEAN OFF IS THE VERSION SHE PUBLISHED AND THE REASON WE GET TO HEAR HIS STORY TODAY IM SO BROKEN
jean’s ‘gift’ from the ravens with his broken magnets, blacked out postcards and angry letters is making me cry he deserves so much better
slowly realising that this book is gonna be super triggering lol whoops
a cool evening breeze 🥲
THAT CREEPY LITTLE GOALKEEPER IS MY FAVOURITE GUY OK
‘kevin saw nothingn but the court, but jean had stopped hoping for more than that years ago’ shut the fuckkkk uppppp i cant do this anymore kevin/jean relationship is so deeply important to me (i say this about everything)
chapter 5:
SECOND NEIL/ JEAN INTERACTION OF THE BOOK IM SO FUCKING EXCITED
‘of course it’d be you, you tedious malcontent’ ‘good morning to you too’ is so ‘morning sunshine’ ‘fuck you’ coded (neil and matt bromance confirmed)
the amount of mitski on this jean playlist is making me sick
FUCKING SCREAMING OMFG THIS IS THE JEAN/NEIL CONTENT I YEARN FOR
‘abominable cockroach’ aww jean u say the sweetest things 🥰❤️ neil loves u too babe
literally devouring every last scrap of information jean feeds us about neil - his slow, hungry, hateful smile and the madness in his eyes (neil baby i love u never change)
oh jean don’t diss aaron, do u know how many fanfics have been written about u two
tsc is confirmation that jean moreau will come into ur house and judge u based on the contents of ur fridge (and then throw out ur stash of lollies)
‘to have a real match as a palate cleanser’ jean is really trying to win my favour by borrowing neil’s sassiness huh (no wonder i love them so much together) ((and yes i know he’s BEEN sassy ok))
jean reaching for the tv screen as if he could save neil and describing andrew running for neil as if hell was on his heels is making me absolutely giddy idk whether to scream or cry i’m doing both and i’m giggling
I bet on losing dogs is so jean moreau coded omg
holy fuck nora, the moments after the raven/fox match when riko tries to kill neil is fucking amazingly written. reading from jean’s perspective as he watches the game on tv, the tension, the breathless anxiety and confusion of the scene is palpable i coukd fucking taste it, my chest is tight just reading it
JEAN SAYING ANDREW WILL BE COURT IS IMMACULATE
#tsc#the sunshine court#jean moreau#aftg#all for the game#the foxhole court#neil josten#andreil#andrew minyard#palmetto state foxes#kevin day#jeremy knox#usc trojans#nora sakavic#tsc spoilers
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Antares reader here! Got something good so probs a hurt/comfort?
Dick Grasyon x Adopted son of Deathstroke (who's a mercenary as well???)
HEAR ME OIT HE ANGST POTENTIAL IN THIS IS OVERWHELMING!
"Why are you avoiding me?" "Because.... Because i think im falling in love with you okay?" TROPE OMG FKDNDRN
Or "Fuck you!" "Later. Now listen here you little shit-"
IM SHAKING AND BEGGING YOU
HELLO! If it’s okay, I’m just gonna call you Antares anon :3!! I did get your other request, and I am working on it!!! CHAT SCHOOL HAS BEEN KILLING ME!! I was listening to Once more to see you and Cop Car by mitski. And omg.. dawg it lowkey made me emotional!!!
Why would Nightwing himself want to be involved with a guy, the son of Deathstroke? It was a moment of weakness. He shouldn’t be involved with you. You were trained to be a hired gun. A mercenary just like Deathstroke, you do it for the money.
He shouldn’t be involved with someone like you who is connected to a person who wants Batman gone. But it hurts to avoid you. It hurts knowing he will have to get you locked up one day.
Though the chemistry you two share is unavoidable. The small talks on the rooftops during Dicks patrol, the cat and mouse chase you two share. But it’s all platonic right? It’s not. But that’s what Dick wants to believe.
He can’t afford to have these feelings towards you any longer.
But you don’t feel the same way.
The thought of you finally having someone in your life that wasn’t just training you to end lives was refreshing. You wanted the daily night meetups to continue. You loved them, being able to have small breaks with a person you slowly grew to love felt enjoyable.
But you had no clue on how Dick was such against the idea.
He didn’t want to be against it.
But he had to. He was slowly melting onto you, completely sticking onto you like glue. Unable to be tore away. He secretly wished you would change.
Change just so he can be with you, how selfish, he knows. Wanting you to change just so he can be with you the way he likes it. When he knew you weren’t going to change just for him, the avoidance started.
Avoiding you at any cost, stopped meeting at your spot. Stopped answering your calls and texts. Started ghosting you. You obviously noticed this. How can it go unnoticed?
The word “read” under every text you sent suffocated your heart. Then the overthinking started.
“Hey.” Read.
“You okay?” Read.
“Did I do something wrong?” Read.
The overthinking, did you upset him? You probably said something wrong. He probably needs space! From what though?
How were you supposed to know how he felt? He was being childish. Childish in a way, refusing to communicate, refusing to acknowledge you any longer.
Refusing to acknowledge your text, refusing to acknowledge your missed calls, refusing to acknowledge your voicemails, refusing to acknowledge you.
Then the hatred started. All those months of getting to know Dick, and just for him to completely shove you off. Ghosting you for weeks straight, you grew angry with him.
You tried not to think about it, but it was eating you from the inside out. It was hurting like a breakup. Your life fell silent once again.
Dick completely walking out of your life without a reason, without an explanation! Oh and how it irritated you.
You waited for hours at the spot you two usually always met at. Staying out all night just for a no show. It’s like Nightwing never even existed.
It was just all apart of your imagination. Imaging a friend you finally had who was a hero.
You knew him and you being so close wasn’t the best idea, you two had completely different career paths, but still decided to stick to each other.
Though Dick was the one who broke that cycle. The way he always caught himself staring at you for long period of time, his hand always on you somewhere.
It wasn’t going to work out anyways. He always thought.
He convinced himself that you felt the same about the situation. Manipulating himself just to get out of a situation he put himself in.
Those text messages and missed calls didn’t even matter.
But oh when you caught him. It’s like his whole world crashed;
“Dick.”
His name being spoken from the distance, it was obviously you. You caught him, finally finding him after almost a month. You sounded angry, pissed. You had every right to be.
“You aren’t going to say anything? Seriously?”
Dick couldn’t even turn around, couldn’t even face you after such a long time. The guilt started to wash over him like a wave.
The silence was so loud, the only light providing you was the moon. Gotham was settling down for the night, hardly any noises coming from the city. It was like it was just you two in the whole entire world.
“Did I do something wrong?”
No, he didn’t want you to think that. But he caused it. He caused those thoughts to flood in your mind. He didn’t mean to, but he made it happen.
“No, of course not..” He finally said something, slowly turning to you just to see your face scrunched up with confusion and anger.
You found that hard to believe, did you really not? “Yeah, I ghosted you for a whole month. But you didn’t do anything wrong! Makes sense right?”
That’s exactly what you heard from what he said.
“Really? So, my texts didn’t mean shit to you?” You said, stepping closer towards him just for him to back away, like you were some type of disease he couldn’t risk having.
Dick tried to say something, but stutters only came out. He couldn’t make up an excuse. How was he supposed to tell you?
“We can’t see each other cause you kill people.”
“I can’t be seen with you.”
“It’s just your father.”
“I’m trying to save my own fucking reputation.”
He didn’t know how to word it right. He found it impossible. The silence he was giving you was slowly bringing tears to your eyes.
You didn’t want to fucking cry in front of him, you feel embarrassment fade over you. This situation was stressing both of you out. Oh please, cut him some slack.
“It’s complicated.” Dick mumbled. It was, so complicated. Your feelings, his feelings, they weren’t complimenting the situation well.
Dick not giving you a valid explanation irritated you, it made your breath hitch and just made you go silent. The way he was avoiding your eyes, the way he looked anywhere but you.
“Listen—“ He started, but failing horribly to even complete his sentence. The look of your face just made him carry more guilt.
He should’ve been mature about this, instead of ghosting you he should’ve talked to you about the problem. Surely you’d understand, right?
Probably not.
“We can’t be seen together.” Dick got out.
His words sinking in your bead, the words overlapping in your thoughts. Were you really that bad? That bad that Dick is completely avoiding you?
“You can’t be seen together.” You repeated. “Really?”
“Yes, really.” Dick let out, a slight harsh following his tone shortly after.
ALRIGHT BRUH LIKE I ACTUALLY HAD TO GET RID OF THIS, WHY DID I HAVE SUCH HARDCORE WRITERS BLOCK?? IDK! BUT HERES THIS PART AND I PROMISE ILL FINISH IT WHEN I HAVE THE TIME.
#dc comics#batman#nightwing#nightwing x male reader#dick grayson x male reader#dick grayson#writers block#sigh#i tried
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Random AOT Headcanons - Modern AU
(ft. Eren, Connie, Sasha, and Jean)
summary: Stuff I couldn’t formulate into a coherent or long enough post. Kinda fluff? I just want them to be happy tbh🥺.
a/n: Mostly character traits for my fic temperance! 👀 But honestly, this is how I picture them in general. I’ve been missing my own story lately (even though I’m literally responsible for writing it💀).
Eren:
Addicted to those shitty mobile games. He’ll turn on airplane mode just so he doesn’t get stupid pop-up ads.
Since he’s an avid mobile gamer, if he’s out of whatever resource he needs, he’ll pay that $2.99 for a ‘booster pack’ or whatever.
Hates cilantro. Despises it. He gets lowkey mad when he sees it on his plate💀
Has those ‘Ken’-like senses whenever Mikasa needs him. He will drop whatever he is doing to save his girl!
If Mikasa is shopping at Aritzia- Eren will probably chill on the boyfriend couches or play with the arcade machine. Like I said before, since he has those ‘Ken’-like senses, he’ll immediately stop whatever he’s doing for Mikasa (she’s perfectly fine and just dropped her chapstick).
Listens to anything Metro Boomin produces. Also, listens to Mitski (Class of 2013 fs).
Connie:
His ringtone is ‘Gucci Flip Flops’ by Bhad Baby. It started off ironic just so he could piss Eren and Jean off, but he’s now one of her biggest stans.
He won’t stop playing ‘Gucci Flip Flops’ (while he’s in the shower, getting ready, cooking, etc.) to the point where Eren and Jean have threatened to evict him. Connie says they’re “Silencing female musicians” and continues playing the song.
HE IS A HOT GIRL! HE LOVES MEGAN THEE STALLION!
Likes to wear beanies in the winter.
Adds extra marshmallows in his hot chocolate☕️.
Has an extensive shoe collection (mainly Jordan’s).
Posts those: ‘Show younger you or a bad [insert month]’ templates on Instagram. (He genuinely believes that not posting it will curse him).
Sasha:
Avid Google Maps user. Only to find really good hole-in-the-wall restaurants, though.
Writes restaurant reviews on Google Maps for fun.
Gets mad when said restaurants become popular (my sister in Christ- you wrote the reviews telling people to go there…)
Her favourite music consists of Fleetwood Mac, TWICE, New Jeans and old country/blues.
She cries over those little Korean baby variety shows whenever she gets them on her for you page.
Always carries a packet of ketchup and hot sauce in her wallet.
She gets those ‘This was meant for you’ tarot card readings on TikTok and watches all the way through.
Sends those OBSCENE emoji chain mail text messages to Connie and Jean because it’s funny.
Jean:
Posts gym photos like a harlot.
Sends Connie those ‘Post younger you or bad month’ templates because it’s funny to see him get flustered…
He really likes pop-punk music and one direction (I don’t make the rules).
One time, he walked in on Connie and Sasha watching Ru Paul’s drag race, and he was being such a little shit disturber about it. Until he realized four hours had passed and he was already watching the Queens getting fitted for their final looks.
Rise and Grind- Chicken, rice and unseasoned broccoli mf… Until he got bored of prepping the same meals. He’s become a better cook because of it!
He and Connie love getting high and fucking around while baking those Betty Crocker cake mixes (funfetti or chocolate).
Jean’s favourite movie is The Big Short.
One time, he sat on a Nutella sandwich Connie left on the couch, and Eren accused him of shitting himself. Jean got so heated that they almost fist-fought until Armin had to mediate.
a/n: I’ve been procrastinating napping💀… I’m gonna do that now and work on my Geto fic… hehe…
#modern aot headcanons#modern au aot#attack on titan#snk#shingeki no kyojin#jean kirstein headcanons#sasha braus Headcanons#connie springer headcanons#eren jaeger headcanons#connie springer aot#jean kirstein aot#sasha braus aot#eren jeager aot#eren jeager#sasha braus#connie springer#jean kirstein#mv.writing📝#they’re so funny and silly hehe#i love them so much#I need to get out of this writing slump… hmmm…#a nap first though
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My Love, My World, My Treasure
Richter Belmont x f! reader
❀ Dividers by @saradika-graphics ❀
ꕤ I recommend listening to Two Slow Dancers by Mitski while reading this ꕤ
Summary: A week had passed ever since you finally killed the patriarch that used you as a weapon to rage against wars. The nightmare was over, you were finally free. Then…you became more aloof, distancing yourself from everyone. Richter and the others knew what was up. Tera and Maria decided to help Richter out to do something special for you, to bring out a smile on your face once again…
“Richter, where are you taking me?” You asked in curiosity while having a blindfold over your eyes. “Hold on, we’re almost there.” Richter reassured you, holding your hands steadily that way you don’t trip or bump into anything. Still wondering what Richter was up to. Your eyes remained close behind the blindfold. “Okay, my sweet dove, we’re here.” Richter released your hands, hearing the steps of him walking behind you to untie the knot of the blindfold.
With the blindfold no longer shielding the surprise, you lit your eyes open and felt the warm breeze crawling up on you, your hair dancing mid-air as it flowed over some parts of your face.
You gasped, reeling in joy and happiness. Your eyes wandered around the place, you were taken to a field full of gorgeous flowers by your amazing boyfriend Richter Belmont. So this is what he wanted to show you.
Roses, daisies, tulips and many other flowers were blooming beautifully on the green shining grass. “They’re beautiful!” You beamed out, bending down to touch the petals with your fingertips. “I know you haven’t been feeling like yourself recently.” Richter spoke calmly while he went over to you, a worried smile appearing, “I wanted to do something special for you, to bring a smile to your face once again. To cheer you up…”
You stood up, walking over to Richter with a sweet loving smile popping up, “Richter…” he held your hands and motioned his eyes to gaze at yours, “I hope this isn’t too much, you’ve been through a lot and I realized we were never able to spend more time together since we were so focused on things that were dragging us down to the fucking dirt. You mean a lot to me, (Name).” He squeezes your hands lovingly, his blue oceanic orbs falling up on you, “I can’t bear to see you suffering like this…”
Richter was hurting deeply inside, for you and he figured out that you haven’t been your usual happy-self for the past few days. This is why he did all this for you…
“Oh Richter…” You held up your hand, caressing the side of his face while he looked at you worryingly, “This…all this means everything to me. I love what you did with the flowers…” you pulled away to look down to the blossoms. “Somehow they remind me of a beautiful garden back home in London, do you remember?”
Richter chuckled, recalling the moments you spent more time with him when you were both children, “I always plucked out the rose from the bush and removed its bloody thorns before putting on your hair. Sometimes I get yelled at by one of your butlers since I wasn’t supposed to take the flower from a bush.” He picked out a Chrysanthemum and placed it behind your ear, admiring how stunning you look with it. “You love to make those flower crowns and put them on my head, wanting me to match with you.”
You smiled fondly, “Oh yes. I even made a flower ring for you too. “ Those were the greatest days for you and Richter. You were much happier back then, running around in the garden with Richter while he chased you wildly. “I..missed this…I missed the moments we had together when we were kids.”
Richter held your hands together in his palms, gazing his blue sea orbs upon you, “I do too, (Name). Nine years and here I thought…I would never see you again. The person whom I held so close to my heart.”
You recalled the time where Richter rescued you from that cult, he couldn’t recognise you at first. You never prayed for someone you knew to come and rescue you. Richter Belmont, the close friend you ever had, rescued you. He came back to you. During the invasion in London, with the vampires slaughtering the citizens, Richter thought you were killed along with your family.
He regained some parts of his happiness when he found you, so did you.
Richter sat beside you as you began to make garlands, creating a crown out of various flowers. He watches you making one, his gaze unmoving. “Where do you see us when this is all over?” Richter had been wanting to ask you for a while, he never got the chance to for some reason. Perhaps he was too focused on taking down the Messiah and her army.
You put down the unfinished crown on your lap and face Richter in his direction, “I truly wish I have an answer for that. I never thought about it that deeply. Maybe…somewhere nice…perhaps in a cottage. Living there peacefully I suppose..”
Richter shone a warm smile, holding your hand into his, “That would actually be quite nice…for you and me.” You gave him a kiss on the cheek in return before finishing off making the garlands. Richter knew you would need this, wanting to get away from all the terrible things that were dragging you down.
You set your eyes towards the warm blue sky, the yellow-red burning sun shining brightly on your face, “It’s quite lovely out here, isn’t it?” you stood up with that finished flower crown in your hands you finished making.
Richter got up on his feet, standing next to you. His eyes wandered around the area, a little speck of gleam going through his pupils, “It really is. Not as beautiful as you though.”
Your face flushed at his compliment, you turned towards his direction wanting to look him in the eye with that flourishing reddened face of yours. Richter found it quite adorable seeing you like that, it brings him much joy just by spending his time with his lover. Seeing a girl he truly loves smiling once again.
He took the flower crown off your hands, slowly planting it on your head. A sparkle of happiness painted over Richter’s face, “You look beautiful as ever, (Name).” The wind dancing through your hair, parts of them flowing over your face as a radiant smile shone across your lips.
Richter gripped your hands, inching you closer to him. He held your head leaning in for a kiss. You closed your eyes when his lips touched yours sweetily. A slow, passionate kiss melting onto your soft lips. Richter moved his head away from your face to say, “I love you, (Name), so damn much.”
Your eyes pricked with tears, “I know. I love you too.” You wrapped your arms around him lovingly, your head burying into his chest, “My love, my world, my treasure.” you looked up to his face, smiling as you shed more tears of sparkled joy, “You are the one I need. You, Richter Belmont, are my precious treasure.”
─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───
a/n - Hello everyone! I hope you all like what I've written on here! I wanted to tear up so much while writing the ending for this (╥﹏╥)
Anyways, keep yourselves warm in this very cold season and make sure you take care of your health! ( • ᴗ - ) ✧
UNTIL NEXT TIME 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔
─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───
#castlevania#castlevania nocturne#richter belmont#castlevania x reader#castlevania nocturne x reader#richter belmont x reader#richter belmont x you#richter belmont imagine#castlevania imagine#richter belmont fluff
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