#i really love my country but it's political situation feels so hopeless | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

miriel-therindes · 2 years

Note

Tell me about your Denethor and Boromir opinions...

Dangerous question, anon, but sure.

Soooooo on this blog I stan stewards, not kings, and i specifically love Denethor II, Lord and Steward of Gondor, and his sons.

(And I only acknowledge the book characters, not the m*vie versions of them.) So anyways...

The three of them are some of my favourite characters in the legendarium. I love the complexity of their characters and morals and motives, the complicated family dynamics, and Gondor as a whole.

Buckle up, tumblr, because I can ramble for a long time about all of my thoughts about these lads.

Ok so about Denethor- he’s so interesting and INCREDIBLE and I really love him so very much...this man held Gondor against sauron for DECADES and stared the dark lord in the eye while he was showed every terrible thing that could happen to his family and his beloved country, and he barely blinked. This man had no hope to speak of, he knew that by all probability that his country would fall, his sons would die, he would die, everything he’d ever loved or fought for would perish into ash and flame and he held FIRM. He loved and fought so goddamn much and in the end, the reason he broke was out of grief for his sons!!!

Book!Denethor loved both of his sons. I’m not saying that he was the perfect parent, he did favour Boromir over Faramir, he did have a ton of relationship issues with both his sons.

See, the thing is, he was a father and they were his sons. But he was also the Steward of Gondor and Boromir was High Warden of the White Tower and Faramir was a Captain of Gondor and when relationships are both familial ones of love and and political ones of trying to defend their country from a devastating doom with their lives, things get. complicated.

And lord I’m not saying he was perfect, they all had really screwed-up relationships with each other! they were all human and making mistakes and snapping at each other and pushing away. Denethor didn’t, I think, have very healthy relationships with his sons. That does not mean he was abusive. They are all grown men with complicated family dynamics and ulhealthy relationships do not equal abuse!

A lot of the tension between Denethor and Faramir, can, I believe, be attributed to a disagreement about situational ethics BUT that’s a whole other ramble and I’m not going to go into the details of analysing their disagreements here.

OH! Also! Something worth noting is that it’s canonically said that Faramir is more alike to Denethor than Boromir is. Which is really interesting to me and brings me to the conclusion that Boromir was more alike to Finduilas, which I love.

And for the record Denethor never sent Faramir on some sort of suicide mission to Osgiliath.

Oh, and I will never forgive Peter Jackson for robbing us of the scenes of Denethor’s profound grief over Faramir...his attempt to burn himself and his son alive was not over some stupidity but rather knowledge of what would wait them when the city fell. Whether or not that motive is morally acceptable can be up for debate, I suppose, but it wasn’t over this “my line has ended oh noes i gonna burn me and my alive son who i think is dead???? in the fire” nonsense from the movies. It was an act of protection and desperation and love and despair and grief and PETER JACKSON HOW COULD YOU DO THAT. THAT SCENE IS ONE OF THE MOST MOVING ONES IN THE BOOK.

Ok so Gondor...I have a lot of Feelings about Gondor and a lot of them are just about the utter fatalistic bravery and determination and dauntlessness of these people...see there really was absolutely no hope left in Gondor. They knew they would lose and that it was hopeless and that they would die and they. kept. FIGHTING. There’s a really incredible bravery in fighting like that when there is no hope and it was found most in the people of Gondor, the front lines, the red blood spilled without hope but with LOVE. I think about Denethor wearing chainmail under his robes and the grim determination it takes him to get out of bed before sunrise and face another day against the Dark. I think about Faramir and Boromir at Osgiliath...not the straightforward victory that it was in the flashback scene in the movies, but the absolutely DEVASTATING loss- the last stand at the bridge, desperately trying to destroy it...MY BOY BOROMIR RETOOK OSGILIATH and then the risk and sacrifice it took to blow up the bridge- and they all died, they died, every single one of those soldiers DIED except for two who escaped with Boromir and Faramir. THEY KEEP FIGHTING AND DYING AND FIGHTING SOME MORE

*takes deep calming breaths*

Okay on to Boromir. Boromir my beloved...

Boromir is such an amazing character and anon i could go on about him for hours but I eventually need to stop rambling about Gondorians and my beloved steward family and post this, so I’ll try to keep it concise.

Boromir is sososo brave and dependable and good and kind and I love him, I love him SO much anon. And he deserved so much better- it breaks my heart to know that he never got to see Gondor free from the crippling fear of Mordor, that he never got to see his baby brother wed, that he never got to shed even for a moment the crushing responsibility and pressure that was on him for his whole life. Boromir bled and sacrificed so much while knowing he would never be able to entirely succeed and he did it anyway.

And he tried to take the Ring from Frodo. Yes he did! And this cannot be excused! But it’s IMPORTANT to remember what his motives were in taking the Ring- like always, like he’s been doing his entire life, he’s trying to save his family and people and country. This isn’t an excuse but I’m trying to point out WHY he did it- it wasn’t some inherent weakness or evil, it’s desperation.

Boromir knows what will happen if Sauron gets the Ring- Galadriel showed him. And here the Ring is going TOWARDS Sauron in the hands of a strange creature not even four feet tall. Try to see it from his point of view for just a minute, not condoning it, but understand.

And maybe it’s his failing- but you see the thing is! he didn’t fail in the end!! He fell but in the end his failing was NOT the ring, he realises his mistake! in just a few moments he turns around and realises the terrible thing that he did and tries to make it right!

And then he gives his life in defence of two little hobbits, his friends. And in the end, maybe his defence was pointless, Merry and Pippin were still captured, he didn’t achieve anything. But it was heartfelt and it was love. There’s a beauty in sacrifice without hope or victory but just out of goodness and courage and LOVE-

Anyways Denethor and Boromir are without doubt two of my favourite characters in fiction ever and asdfghkuhiwhatighaieughtiawught the m*vies messed them up SO bad. I will never forgive Peter Jackson for his slaughter of EITHER of their characters.

Thanks for the ask anon, this has been Unpopular and Controversial Opinions by Aurlynd time <3 You don’t have to agree with me I support everyone’s right to dislike Boromir and Denethor as long as they do it for the right reasons.

(I think I’m at least mostly right about them though)

#denethor #boromir #book denethor #book boromir #stewards #lotr #gondor #tolkien #i wrote this fuelled with passion while very sleep deprived so it's probably riddled with errors i apologise #asks #answered asks

29 notes · View notes

mbti-notes · 3 years

Text

Anon wrote: Hey. I'm INFJ. I want to ask about relationship problems. The relationship in question is between my ESTJ mother and I. Generally, I would describe our relationship as close and loving, but there is a conflict, and that came from our opposite ideology and political beliefs.

I want to say before continuing that we are neither American or European, so our ideology and politics shouldn't be understood from the "western" side of things, though to simplify by comparison, my views could be described as leftist and my mother's as conservative. I should also add that I used to hold her worldview when I was younger, but changed once I was old enough to form an opinion of my own. This caused my mother to imply many times in our discussions that I am "brainwashed" and dismiss me as "too young" and "too ideological". I should add that the latter (ideological) is a valid criticism. Still working on that.

Otherwise, I often tried to persuade, then later find middle ground with her, to no avail. We ended up arguing many times, until we decided to not talk politics with each other anymore. So, what's the problem, you might ask.

Recently, the political climate in my country got intense. Heated, even. I won't go into details, but there are protests again the government by young liberals/leftists-equivalent of my country. Many of my good acquaintances joined the protest. The government used police force against them, and it got violent. There are young unarmed protestors who were teargassed, beaten, and shot with rubber bullets and high velocity water jets. Some protestors were heavily injured. Some protestors were arrested and incarcerated in horrible conditions. My mother and I agreed to not speak about politics, so I said nothing.

Until my mother, right infront of me, with another family member, openly mocked the protestors, made judgments about them based on the goverment's propaganda, called them a nuisance, and implied that they "deserved it". It's not about her discussing it, but it's about how unempathetic she was when she said those things, towards those young people my age, with similar ideology to me, and how apathetic she was when she said that "nothing's going to change anyway". It was the first time that I saw my mother in that angle, the complete lack of humanity in her words. It still haunts me until now.

So my question to you is, how does one deal with that? I love my mother, I think I always will. I also know that she loves me, or at least the part of me that's still her child. But for a moment, I loved her less, and that frightened me. I began to wonder, what would happen one day if we have to actually take sides, because things are getting worse in my country, not better. This adds to other issues I have in my life and made me more depressed. A part of me tells me that I should tell her about how I feel, but how do you tell someone you love that they're one of the reasons for your sadness?

I'm sorry if this is stupid. I'm sure that this feeling I have is one-sided, and I wonder if I'm being selfish or ungrateful. Maybe it's because I'm too sensitive these days, so I thought if I have an outside neutral opinion, it will help illuminate my clouded mind. Thank you. I hope you had a good summer break!

------------------------

The sentence that sticks out at me the most is: "It was the first time that I saw my mother in that angle, the complete lack of humanity in her words." I would argue that the problem doesn't lie with her. In fact, nothing about your mother had changed. She was still the same woman as before she uttered those words. The issue arises from your perception of her and the standards by which you evaluate her.

I follow world affairs very closely, so I think I know which region you are speaking of. One of the biggest problems in the manner that people think and talk about politics is the tendency to stereotype. Stereotyping is basically a form of cognitive oversimplification. It makes your thinking ability fast but also very dull and blunt, unable to understand situations with the nuance and sophistication that is required for good judgment and decision making.

It doesn't matter which country/culture you are from, there is always some variation of "right versus left". Why? Because in every society, there will always exist an underlying tension between those who don't want change and those who do. You may label these two opposing forces as right vs left, conservative vs liberal, regressive vs progressive, etc, but the fact of the matter is that these labels are gross oversimplifications of people's political belief systems.

When you divide people along an oversimplified dichotomy, it's too easy to stereotype them, in terms of believing that all people on each "side" hold all the same beliefs and values. Stereotyping goes along with the natural tendency of humans to be tribal. You start to view those on your side as being intellectually and morally superior to those on the other side. This leads to dehumanization and even demonization of the other side. In essence, you lose the ability to empathize with people, as long as you believe that they aren't on your side or the "right" side.

It seems that your political thinking has become too stark due to how extreme the situation has become. You have the feeling of fighting for your life because of the way that the situation has been handled by authorities, as they are indeed putting people's lives in danger. Your feelings about the situation are completely valid. But you fail to recognize that your mom's feelings about the situation are also valid. Certainly, there are hard-core fundamentalists and extremists out there that you can never reach because their beliefs and values are not based in any form of reason. However, I don't think your mom fits into that category, does she?

Do you know what it means to have no humanity? You are accusing her of something like psychopathy. Is that really true of her? I don't think so. She said: "nothing's going to change anyway". I don't consider this an expression of "apathy", as you assume. This is an expression of hopelessness. In that sentence, there is a real possibility that your mom is sympathetic at heart, but she disagrees that the chaotic actions of the protestors (i.e. the method) will lead to any meaningful change... and she may be absolutely right about that.

You haven't grasped the nuances of your mom's beliefs and values because your mindset has been so hardened by the extreme nature of the political conflict. This means that, when you engage in political discussion with her, you are unable to: 1) acknowledge how she feels, 2) acknowledge that there is some reason/merit/validity behind her beliefs, and 3) be open-minded enough to meet her halfway.

Put another way: If you met someone who wouldn't acknowledge your feelings as valid, dismissed all of your beliefs and values as completely wrong without proper investigation, and only sought to "convert" you, would you want to communicate with them? Probably not. This is the unproductive attitude that you now both bring to the table. This is the divisive attitude that arises when a conflict becomes too polarized and everyone is forced to "choose a side".

Unless one of you learns to listen and communicate more effectively, what will change? You say that you have tried to find middle ground with her but always end up arguing. Not finding middle ground is one thing, but getting caught up in interpersonal drama is a whole other thing. The option to amicably agree to disagree is always available. If you genuinely respect someone and respect their freedom to form their own beliefs, it shouldn't be hard to agree to disagree. Why do you find it so difficult to let her be her? Ultimately, you're not really interested in "middle ground"? You just want her agreement? Getting caught up in arguments all the time, especially on a recurring basis, indicates poor communication skills that stem from a troubling lack of objectivity. The more you argue with the intent to shame/change the other person, the more you push them away from your side, and the more myopic you get in your own beliefs.

You seem to have fallen into the trap of categorizing her into the tribe that you view as the enemy of your tribe, namely, the authorities that are cracking down on you young protestors. You've started to view her as the enemy, now you can't empathize with her, and even accuse her of having no humanity. You now consider yourself morally superior to her. If there is any possibility that she could be your ally, you've slammed the door on it.

You describe a very dire and desperate political situation that affects everyone, BUT, it doesn't affect everyone the same way. Different people have very different ways of dealing with intense emotions like fear, insecurity, grief, despair, helplessness, etc. Due to inferior Fi, ESTJs have extremely low tolerance for intense and uncontrollable emotions. Remember that one's ability to utilize the inferior function is not much better than a young child. If ESTJs can't neutralize or deflect their sense of powerlessness quickly, the burden of the emotions will quickly destroy them. I don't think you've really understood the thought process behind your mom's words and what is really motivating her "apathy".

Just because someone doesn't agree with your methods, doesn't mean that they don't have anything in common with you. Politics isn't just about good vs evil, as in, if you don't stand up for good, then you are evil. Everyone has their own way of looking at the situation because everyone has their own interests to take care of first and foremost, and everyone has their own ideas about the best methods to pursue. This is true for both you and your mom. It is possible to agree on beliefs but disagree on methods. For example, I'm assuming that you care about this cause so deeply because you care about your future. Sure, your ideas about the future differ from hers. But, certainly, you are both interested in securing your future, aren't you?

History has shown us that young people are always more willing to fight for causes because: 1) they would suffer less immediate material loss than the elder generation, 2) they have fewer life responsibilities, obligations, and commitments to take into consideration, and 3) their lack of life experience sometimes makes their thinking too simplistic when visualizing future implications.

Your interests aren't fully aligned with your mom's in this situation, perhaps because you are from different generations. However, this doesn't mean that your interests don't align in other important ways. At the end of the day, your mom is probably deathly afraid of seeing YOU on the news being beaten to a pulp and disappeared by the police, right? And it may be the case that she's passing harsh judgment on the protestors because she's trying to discourage you from meeting their horrible fate? That's hardly lack of humanity.

To be a good critical thinker, you need to learn to be more objective. Objectivity means understanding all aspects of the situation, or as many as you can manage. Objectivity and empathy often go hand-in-hand. You won't be able to empathize well unless you acknowledge that there might be some aspects of the situation that you're not seeing or understanding. When you take more time to get to the bottom of someone's thought process and why they really feel the way they do, you will discover all sorts of openings to influence their political beliefs in a friendly way. But when you can't even acknowledge that the other side might have an important point to be made, because you are so hardened in your stance, you've created a dead end for yourself.

#politics #empathy #emotional intelligence #debate #disagreement #conflict #infj #infj relationships #communication #ask

27 notes · View notes

popcornbutterflymedia · 2 years

Text

GRAY IS AS MUCH A COLOR, AS ANY IN THE RAINBOW.

star cinema possesses this magical gift of turning the hardest of skeptics into the most hopeless romantics. when improbable tales of love are committed to screen it becomes a reality that’s a little easier to grasp, yet, there was a smidge of trepidation that i personally, maybe a bit unfairly, added to the already considerable weight of this movie. these trepidations aren’t born out of doubt of the creative team’s skill, they are in fact some of my favorite people, nor is it born out of ignorance of the power donny, belle, and their fandom holds. it’s rather the keen awareness that since the height of the pandemic donny and belle are only two of the few artists who are working, the two who have broken through and made the biggest strides, as far as i am concerned, for a network that has been a casualty of the current socio-political situation. movies and entertainment have been pushed down on the list of priorities, and yet, art and entertainment, cinema have never been more essential than at this time of crisis.

to ask donny and belle to carry such weight feels unfair, and yet to have a movie at all is something to thank God for. this is simply to say, i was ready to take anything star cinema could give us. to have this movie exceed my expectations on all fronts is impressive enough. now to have it become one of my top tier star cinema favorites this early on, due to some intensely personal reasons we might get into later, is blowing my mind.

star cinema and its films go through phases. i do not remember when i started paying attention to how many of its movies i allowed to speak to me so closely that i began to recognize patterns: romantic comedy with a touch of drama, conflict of some sort, a familial element. there has been a string of movie favorites that followed this template, some of which i had written about just to quell my feelings that could not be shared to anyone in real life. these favorites are held close to the heart, thoroughly understood and deeply felt. for the longest time, though, i have been quietly wishing for a love story between a character incapable of love, for whatever reason, and a character who is available to everyone, loves until they’re empty because they know what it’s like to regret, who then uses joy to keep deep seated sadness at bay. i also wanted a story about those who willingly stay, but lose a lot by living for others. as for the reason to stay behind, that to me, was open and negotiable, because certain reasons for staying behind, for conflict are still to taboo to discuss on mainstream media. any attempt would fall short in execution. i always wondered how a story between someone who is stuck, and someone gives until they’re empty would progress, how that would be written. no local story has gotten that certain inner conflict right, in my eyes, at least. there was this nagging feeling that i was asking for too much, so i never really spoke about it verbally, and i just waited.

and then this movie comes along.

love is colorblind is a best friends turned lovers story, where love is all that matters, and yet love isn’t all that. in this story love is more a certainty than a question. this is a story of a realistic, grounded love rather than a romantic fairytale. this story is all these things and yet is it so much more. this isn’t a synopsis to reel more people in. i am bad at those. this is just me marveling at how this story was told, and made different, and made to matter.

the film’s opening finds ino’s parents in a dream: his mother in front of her easel, while father and young son wax poetic about colors. we are roused from that dream to find a reality for present day ino that’s stagnant and gray. in present day hong kong we find cara giving up on her roommates, and claiming the west for herself, or perhaps her entire country. (i see what you did there, genius!) in the next moment, cara comes back to a parentless home with only her sisters, her auntie to call family, and a fledgling bakery that sold cheese bread that was once legendary. this particular homecoming was such a surprise, to her auntie, especially, that i initially thought she would be her core conflict. i was wrong.

cara’s first, (and it seems, only) mission this homecoming is to reconnect with her best friend ino who refuses to be found. he leaves no trace of his identity on the face of the internet, his jobs are multiple and short lived. she finally finds him coming out of a random tattoo shop and from then on, refuses to let go. literally.

she accompanies ino to his job with a client at a motel. we get a few suggestive comedic moments that in hindsight is just the tip of the iceberg. the best friends catch up. she notices ino wearing mismatched socks, which he plays off as style. she saves him from humiliation by talking the client out of coloring the in the lion that adorns the client’s ‘juicy butt.’ she talks his ear off, he teases, but does not complain. he treats her to hotdog, feigning generosity, she reminds him that mustard isn’t mayo. we learn the extent of ino’s color blindness. we learn that he’s fallen on hard times, losing the house he grew up in. there are debts to be repaid, an exhibit to mount, and his mother’s reputation to restore. we also learn that she’s (cara) been away for nine months, and that this isn’t the first time she came home. we learn of the time she dropped everything abroad just to come home to him post-accident. he refuses the help she offers, until he almost gets himself run over.

cara finally gets him to speak up. he needs to paint, but his mind and his heart refuses. it’s dead. she could not paint to save his life, but she can resurrect the dead, and so she does. or at least she tries.

cara’s mission is an opportunity to put donny and belle in classic star cinema romantical situations. it felt, to me like the first part of sondheim’s ‘into the woods’ which was a collection of all the fairytales we know and love and feel giddy about. part of celebrating the fact that this movie was born at such an atypical time as this, is again, vowing to take what was given, no matter how simple it seems. it is already worth celebrating to have donny and belle on screen for an entire movie, in moments that pay homage the star cinema tradition that feel familiar to those of us who have been watching the team ups that came before them. the sweetness in this entire first part of cara’s mission is a collective favorite of mine. i do not know if it was on purpose, but it did make me smile.

the narrative of this film weaves in and out of time, with light and color as its transition markers. from the gray of ino’s vision, the saturated light of their youth, and the balanced brightness of their shared present, this movie is visualized and shot so intelligently. this movie makes the intelligent beautiful.

the intelligent and the beautiful suddenly carved unexpected depth, and from that point on, everything about this movie became an emotional surprise. the hallway “eroplano” scene is a moment that lead the way to the steep curve of the story. it set the tone for the second half of the film. while it’s true that light flooded their idealistic youth, their shared past, we get glimpses of some sun drenched tragedies of their childhood that break the rule of illuminating the idealistic, and proposed the idea of light signifying distance, from a childhood innocence that cannot be revisited. for ino, it seemed to suggest childhood traumas that enjoyed the generosity of light that should stay , trapped in the past.

more on trauma and conflict later on.

can we talk about the ensemble cast in the context of the character?

in this best friends turned lovers story, love isn’t a question to be answered but a certainty waiting in the wings for its right time, and timing, a certainty that is tested. that’s where sky and iris come in.

iris, played effortlessly by angelina, (so effortless, it’s hard to believe it’s her first movie ever) is an art curator, the lady in red, and ino’s patient mentor. she succeeds in helping ino paint again. through her voice colors and their corresponding emotions sound like poetry. she is a woman of sophistication and confidence. she confident enough to own her feelings, even her feelings for ino.

sky, played by jeremiah is our favorite donbelle third wheel. he was able to craft a character entirely different from his last third wheel character. sky has always been there every time cara needed him. even when she didn’t. he was there when ino was lagging behind. he made himself better for himself, and for her.

this might be the most mature love quadrangle i’ve seen in recent years. both characters vying for ino’s and cara’s attention, have enough self-respect and awareness to see the writing on the wall. these two characters are interesting to me, because on paper, sky and iris would make perfect partners for cara and ino respectively. they would be the easier choice. sky and iris are both healers. healers do not always get to be the beloved. and that is another way this movie challenged the formula. and i love the creatives for that.

esnyr’s multi-verse of characters feature throughout the movie. i must admit, i know very little about him, seeing him only on twitter, as i do not have a tiktok account. i have yet to give in. this film introduced him to me, and i must say, his brand of comedy makes me laugh the most. he is observant, has his pulse on what is funny, he is so intelligent, and unbelievably quick and witty. his characters serve to break the tension of the story in the right places. the turns his comedy takes prevent monotony, and at times his emotion reflects the emotion of the audience. his emotion gives audiences permission to go through their emotions. that’s another cool thing about his characters, they were either reactionary or a trigger, whatever the moment needs, and once they did what they had to, they stepped aside. they became, mostly quiet observers. they never overpowered the protagonists, who were also strong and remarkable enough to not be drowned out.

a belated realization on esnyr’s multiple characters is how they are used as plot devices that thread through the entire story. it’s the constant in a story that is constantly changing. come to think of it, the characters are also reflective of our leads. the only time the andrei character left the scene, was when ino came to cara’s house, and left once he saw that cara needed a moment to herself. i am only realizing this as i am writing this down so i can only hope this makes sense.

of foregone resolutions, grounded conflict, and a never ending love story.

to say that both belle and donny did well as cara and ino is an understatement. to better understand the complexities of their characters, is to understand their conflicts.

cara is a girl who is so full of life and energy, and joy, she is almost at the brink of being a caricature of herself. her auntie initially presents herself as conflict, being someone who questions her choices. when we see her break first in the school hallway, pretending to be an airplane in front of ino, we realize that she’s carrying a grief so deep, a guilt so strong, and that hers is a joy that requires much effort. her choices are born of a desire to never leave a stone unturned. she knows what she wants, who she wants, even if her choices do not make sense to those around her.

now, ino’s complexity is difficult to put into words without spoiling the plot. it is difficult to put into words, personally. the first time i saw the movie, after the premiere, i tweeted, ‘dummies guide to loving suffering artists,’ to sum the movie up. that is cara’s journey with ino, and that is ino’s journey with his mother. and that journey with his mother unfortunately tought him what he deserves, and how much he should take of what he’s given.

both ino and cara are huge shoes to fill for donny and belle. they look like stereotypes on paper, when they are anything but. i know cara’s extreme joy and gift for gab is a stretch for belle. and ino might be the toughest, most demanding character i’ve seen donny play. they both were able to make use and maximize their gifts to play their parts as truthfully as possible. for belle, it’s her dramatic gift, and her versatility. for donny, it’s his quiet steadiness, powerful eyes, and his ability to make his moments count.

there is such specificity to how both cara’s and ino’s characters are written, their conflicts, especially. without going into details, i will say i am grateful. being the hopeful, happy one for others, to the point of being performative, is real. this is the first movie i’ve seen that used joy as a coping mechanism correctly. this is also the first time i’ve seen the extreme artistic temperament portrayed perfectly, that it hurts. and it heals.

this movie challenges itself and the lessons it offers. through cara and ino, this story teaches acceptance and self love. but that prescription still feels like painting with a broad brush stroke. it’s one thing to know what is deserved, application is an entirely different struggle. our protagonists know what they deserve, but each their inner turmoil make what they deserve that much more difficult to reach.

it is a relief that cara was able to come up for air first. that she, through tita vicky’s help learned to love herself first. it would be heartbreaking to see love go to waste because the people who have so much of it, and so much desire for it are both drowning.

speaking of challenges, this movie is perfect as it is, these are just a few thoughts:

this is a love story, thus the focus on the romance, i get it, but it would’ve been nice to see a bit more of how ino’s mother spiraled. that’s just me and my personal need for it, sort of like another way to tell the story. i also wouldn’t have minded seeing cara’s parents alive, and seeing that dynamic.

another thing is, again, we understand that this is a romance, thus the focus on romance, and love ought to be colorful, but this story also preaches acceptance. it would’ve been cool to see ino on his own, paint for himself in neutrals, and have that signify full acceptance of his condition. and then have him paint in color with the help of those around him. again, these are just thoughts. the movie is perfect as it is.

something must be said about ino and his complicated history with his mom. there are hurts that acceptance cannot easily heal, especially when it is conflict itself that shapes a person, when staying strong and fighting is all one ever knows. ‘napagod akong mahalin siya.’ is a very real sentiment, and a line in the movie that has always made me cry, and always will. again, for deeply personal reasons. this makes the last confrontation scene that much more real. for ino, it isn’t a question of love, or even wanting to close the gap with her. it’s the fact that hurting the one he loves is all he ever knows up to that point. it’s not being able to say the words cara is waiting for, because love has always been demanded of him, and not something he has a right to ask for. you see, for those left behind, sometimes it is better to take one’s self out of the narrative to have space to accommodate more of what the other person needs.

on their last dinner date, cara apologizes for what he has been through. she asks if it is guilt that he’s carrying or the burden of not being able to accept what has become of him. great questions to ponder on. and she means well. i feel, however, that the last question is already a given. those who have exhausted themselves for another person, usually know when they are emptied. they, then end up slaying two demons: one of being the one left behind, constantly battling with how much they’ve given, and another, of how much there is left for one’s self.

when cara and ino meet again, one of the first things cara says is ‘madami nang nagbago sa’kin.’ to which ino replies ‘kikilalanin kita.’

this love story knows no concrete end. it acknowledges that two people in love are constantly changing, and therefore love is a constant choice.

‘gray has never been this colorful.’ he says. it is as much a color, as any other. and even those who find themselves in gray areas of life are both capable, and deserving of love. they say a colored photograph captures an image, a black and white one captures the soul. cara and ino’s love is ever changing, in living color, grounded in reality and soul deep. and all in all, beautiful.

hi! well, this has become a quick favorite. it was tough to write though, i hope i covered everything there is to cover, if not, this will be edited when something comes up. i am grateful for this film. much love to all the wizards in star cinema, you guys are the best. ~ p

#film #film: love is colorblind

8 notes · View notes

flyingdeskset · 4 years

Text

My Guide to Romantic Academia

I have to admit, I’m only new to this myself. I feel like a bit of a hypocrite, trying to teach about something I am myself only learning. But I suppose, I have always been an academic, and I am a bit of an expert in hopeless romanticism. After extensive research, here is what I have come up with (should I put this in two parts? I don’t think so. If you really want to be a romantic academic, you’ll read to the end):

Fashion:

Tops:

Turtlenecks! Any academic’s best friend, they are not only soft and cosy, they are also really cute!

Cowl necks. These are great for winter, and go with literally anything.

Blouses. Specifically with poofy sleeves.

Cardigans. Either the thin, fitted kind or the chunky-knit, over-sized kind; both are great.

Blazers. Don’t know if this should go into outerwear or not. Anyway, these are lovely and go great with fitted skirts and dresses (or jeans, or trousers, if you’re not a skirt-wearer)

Vintage jumpers. I especially love faded mens’ v-necks.

Bottoms:

Pleated skirts. These give off great Catholic school-girl vibes (it doesn’t matter if you’re not catholic. I go to an actual Irish all-girl Catholic school, and I’m not Catholic [nor do I wear pleated skirts, to my dismay])

Woolen skirts. So cosy, and so romantic.

Tweed trousers. I personally don’t own any of these because I don’t really wear trousers, but I intend to buy a pair.

Jeans. Nothing wrong with jeans once in a while! Try to style them with more academic-type tops and outerwear, though.

Outerwear:

Overcoats. Just soft, woolen winter coats. Impractical (since they don’t generally have hoods and I live in the rainiest country ever), but the things we sacrifice for the aesthetic, eh?

Trench coats. These are great for spring.

Hats: berets and caps.

Scarves: honestly, anything. Scarves in and of themselves are very romantic academia.

Gloves: I personally prefer leather, with cotton houndstooth detailing, but this is up to you!

Shoes: oxfords, loafers and pumps (specifically patent) are all great choices. I also love knee-high boots, especially for winter.

Nightwear:

Flannel suits. Stripy flannel. So soft. So cosy. Mine are pink.

Silk suits. Very classy and debonair, and they feel great.

Silk/cotton nightgowns. Another step up with the class! These are great for the summer.

Robes. Any robes, all robes. I recommend having at least three, in various colours, styles and fabrics (you think this is a joke. It’s not. I have four.)

Miscellaneous/Tips:

Dresses (I didn’t know what category to put them in). Vintage is great, but any style that isn’t overly modern is fine.

Fabrics: tweed, wool, cotton, the like. Also, lace. Lace is great.

Colour dos: Muted colours (greys and beiges). Cream is always a win. Jewel tones (emerald, ruby). You can’t go wrong with black, though I try not to go overboard with it.

Colour don'ts: Neon colours are a big no-no. Pastels are a hit-and-miss situation. For example, soft dusky pinks are great, but too much baby blue and you’re straying away from the tortured-academic look. Try and avoid bright scarlets and royal blues.

When wearing basically any top that isn’t a cardigan or a blazer: tuck it in! Whether tucked into a skirt or trousers, this gives off a put together, I-know-what-I’m-doing vibe that is essential (even if you don’t know what you’re doing). It’s also very flattering on a lot of body types.

Of course, fashion isn’t essential to the aesthetic. Adjust this to your tastes!

Media:

Writers/Poets:

Jane Austen

William Blake

Brontë sisters

Lord Byron

Donna Tartt. You know I had to put her in here.

Oscar Wilde (he’s not actually Romantic, but he is Oscar Wilde)(and he’s Irish!)

Maria Edgeworth

Victor Hugo

John Keats

Edgar Allan Poe

Mary Shelley

Henry David Thoreau

William Wordsworth

Feel free to add to this; it’s nowhere near complete.

Composers:

Tchaikovsky

Chopin

Schumann (Clara and Robert)

Liszt

Brahms

Offenbach

Dvořák

Again, not complete!

Movies (because we can’t be 19th century nobility all the time)

Jane Eyre

Dead Poets Society

Kill Your Darlings

Pride and Prejudice

Any other Jane Austen adaptation

Clueless (because of the Jane Austen affiliation!)

10 Things I Hate About You (Taming of the Shrew!)(can you tell I’m making excuses to put 90’s chick flicks in here?)

Becoming Jane

Good Will Hunting

The Princess Bride

Maurice (Hugh Grant!)

Les Misérables

Breakfast at Tiffany’s (honestly, the classy, vintage feeling you’ll get from watching an Audrey Hepburn movie is irreplaceable)

Edgar Allen Poe’s Murder Mystery Dinner Party (not even a movie, it’s just really good)

To be honest, this isn’t even trying to be a complete list. These are just my favourite movies that I can squeeze into the genre.

Lifestyle (the most important bit!):

Carpe Diem. The number one tip for any academic. I feel it’s important to note, this is different for everyone. For some people, ‘seizing the day ’ is skydiving, or dropping everything and travelling the world. For others, it’s simply getting out of the house in the morning, and neither is any better than the other!

Create. This, again, is different for everyone. If you’re a writer, write! This could be a poem, a full blown novel, or just some Oliver/James fanfiction (did I mention I love If We Were Villains?)! If you’re an artist, do art! Whether it’s an oil portrait or a sketch of Richard Papen looking like the lovesick idiot he is, it’s all the same!

Be Mysterious. Honestly, I don’t even know how. I’m still getting the hang of this myself.

Read! Read everything! You don’t have to limit yourself to classics. Also, reading in public is great.

Be polite. Of course, this is a given for everyone. But, if you have the manners of a Victorian lady, it’ll give you definite Mysterious Points.

Drink tea. Or coffee. Or even hot chocolate. And it doesn’t have to be black tea and dark chocolate, because we’re not as bitter as the dark academics.

Take up an instrument. People seem to think this has to be the violin, but it doesn’t. I play the clarinet, and also the ukulele! Whatever is right for you!

Well, I hope this helped people. Remember you don’t have to follow this to the word! Feel free to adapt to your personality, add things, and ask questions!

#romantic academia #dark academia #light academia #fashion #literature #lifestyle #music #romantic academia tips

972 notes · View notes

fe-semi-decent-scenarios · 4 years

Note

Could you write an imagine/head cannons for claude, felix, linhardt, and ashe where their s/o disappears leaving only a note? Then at some point they return out of nowhere. Thank you so much!

{I want to keep these stagnant and close to cannon(also easy for me to write). So i’m making it as if reader disappears with just a note for the 5yr gap and then they come back for the reunion. Is that okay? I hope it is. If not feel free to submit something more specific for a one-shot}

Claude:

Claude. For the past week I have tried to put my feelings onto paper, but I can’t. All I can say is that I am sorry. To stay here and sit around waiting for politicians to decide my next action...it isn’t wise. It seems our plans for the future have taken a detour haha. Always know that I am with you; that I will be rooting for you no matter where we end up after all of this. I know you can make those dreams of yours a reality. I believe in you. -(Y/N)

The parchment had lain flat on his desk on top of many other documents. He had almost missed it if not for the familiar handwriting

For a moment Claude just sits there. In the chaos of recent events he hadn’t much time to check in with his friends or peers. After the Empire took the monastery, he was forced back to Alliance territory. His people needed him more than ever before.

He knew that his classmates wouldn’t stick around much longer either. The nobility? Sure, they had to. But people like Raphael or Ignatz were most likely to pursue their own route

You weren’t excluded from those thoughts. While not at the top of the list, Claude had suspected that you might leave as well. It was the timing that caught him off guard

Why not wait and talk it out together? He admits that not every problem is for you both to share, but this? This was personal just as much political.

He never could out-wit you. Even at simple tasks it was like you were always one step ahead. Hard to read, but still honest. He already misses the challenge.

He will hide the note somewhere in his personal quarters. Where? Who knows. Most likely somewhere no one would ever think to look.

What’s done is done. Claude won’t try to track you down or let his emotions over cumber him. He understands that while you two were ‘together,’ life has taken a turn for the worst. He believes that you can make your own decisions and turns his attention to fight against invasion

It’s five years later. More of his friends had faded out of the picture and he’s become a symbol of the Alliance. Occasionally word of your whereabouts had popped up in his ranks alongside the regular reports. The same was with all his other friends who had gone to down their own path. For Claude, knowing that you were safe was enough

Until you appeared at the thieves’ den. Despite how all his deer were ecstatic about seeing each other, all he could think of was the note back in his room

“I see time has brought us together again my friend. I hope this meeting isn’t purely from luck, we could really use you right about now”

Everyone knows that you both were together. Maybe it wasn’t public knowledge, but your quips and flirty jests never went unnoticed. It was obvious he wanted to speak with you alone

And you do. Claude is understanding and doesn’t question what you’ve been doing while away. All he wants to know is why you didn’t say goodbye in person, and if you were there to stay. That’s it.

He needs his right hand. If you’re there, and with the professor at his side, Claude might just hope to see a happier world. He’s so tired of looking back on the past, and wants to work towards bettering the future.

Felix:

Felix. I can’t stick around twiddling my fingers while Fodlan falls to ruin.You may hate me for this, but I’m prepared for that.We both know your wrath isn’t the worst I’ve seen. Seriously Felix. Be good and don’t kill our friends while I’m away. Stay safe and please refrain from doing anything reckless. You better not roll your eyes at this either, I’ll know...I love you. Take care. -(Y/N)

Ingrid delivered the letter after he was released from guard duty. For a time after the battle Felix joined up with what was left of the Fargeus forces and planned on knocking some sense into their beast of a leader. There was still time to fight back and he’d be damned if they wouldn’t take it. You had joined him eagerly. If anything he expected you to cling annoyingly to his side, just as you always had. He wanted it, really.

He won’t say it but the state of the country had shaken him some. He knew that there was a fight awaiting, and knowing that you’d be there gave him extra motivation to press on.

So the sight of your special seal on the envelope made him smirk. He assumed that sending a letter was your way of butting into his feelings, just like you always did. Ingrid even handed it off with a smile.

He wasn’t expecting a goodbye

How...how dare you spring this on him? Leaving in the middle of a war?With that boar on the loose. When you’re needed the most?! All because you were impatient?!

“That idiot! What do they think they’re do- When did you get this? Do not test me right now Ingrid, I need to hurry”

He crumples up the letter in his fist and marches off to find you. He searches the entire compound/camp until he’s forced to give up. There was enough trouble already and he was wasting time.

Needless to say that he’s furious. So much that he rips the note to pieces and tosses it into the fire. It was in the moment...and he regrets it. Those could have been your last words.

Felix blames you for many things beyond that day. Deep down he knows that Fargeus’ loss isn’t your fault, that Dimitri wouldn’t have died if you stayed, that his old man would be just as burdened...

yet he can’t help but use you as a scapegoat. It’s easy for him to hate you when you’re not there to correct him. It’s easy to despise someone who can’t fight back, or is dead.

Over time the hurt fades to a light burn in his chest, haunting him at night or in his darkest moments. It will appear like a punch in the gut, and linger like the sting of a paper cut. All that pain tied to your name.

When he sees Dimitri alive with the professor, Felix is stunned. There might be a chance at regaining his home. Then he scans the group over.

When he sees you, the pain flares up worse than any blade from the prior battle. Instantly he barrels through the other lions seething with anger and ready to give you hell.

Only to stop when you look his way. With harsh breaths, brows drawn in,and fingernails digging themselves into his palms; he just stands there trembling with raw hatred. No. Not hatred...there’s so much more going on.

He watches your lips move yet doesn’t hear any of it. He wants to blame you for everything, but can’t.

and so he doesn’t. He turns away and stomps off to greet his old professor, and leaves the others to fill you in on the situation It works, and for some time you two don’t speak. He lets the feelings of betrayal fester until one night he forces his way into your room.

“You. Do you have any idea what you’ve put me through. What kind of stupid thoughts were you thinking?! A note? Did you seriously think a note would be enough?”

Ashe:

Ashe. Before I say anything more, please don’t freak out! I know it looks like i’m going awol but I have to do this. I’m not abandoning you, or our friends, or our home; I can’t explain much but know that this is what’s best at least what I hope is best. I love you so, so much. Just trust me on this. It wasn’t an easy choice and you have every right to be upset with me. Heck, even i’m upset with myself for leaving like this. I wish I could take you with me, but you have a role to follow here. Go be the best dang knight I know you’re capable of being. May the goddess keep you safe and sound my love. -(Y/N)

Love letters weren’t your thing. He was always the hopeless romantic and you’d never do something so “sappy”. The letter lain on his cot scared him, but he still opened it.

He doesn’t know how to feel. Ashe thought that the situation couldn’t become worse, that Fodlan had already been drained of all peace. His home was gone,his father dead, his family’s situation unknown, country in ruins, and the loss of the professor was the topper on the cake. Somehow through it all he still continued to look forward, because he had to. If he gave up, then what? What would he do?

He had dreams. To become a knight, live out his days serving the people, care for his siblings...and recently a new one tallied onto that list. On nights that his books didn’t put him to sleep he would dream of a family. One of his own, with you. It gave him a goal to look towards when he felt displaced among his peers.

He cries after finishing the letter. Ashe doesn’t bother holding anything back as he clutches the note to his forehead to cover his face. Through blurred vision he watches tears smear the ink and panics. He sets it aside on his pillow to protect what’s still in tact.

“Why? I would have understood. We could have gone together...”

Which is exactly why you left a note. Ashe knows that you hate to see him upset. After Lanato you would seldom go a day without checking on him...you wouldn’t be able to say no to bringing him.

Ashe could never convince himself to hate you, and would tell off anyone who even thought of calling you a traitor. To be a knight now had a new meaning to him, it was more than the armor and title . When Fargeus fell he took the future into his own hands and left to join whatever resistance remained. He worked to help those in need, and not once did a day go by where he didn’t think of you.

Even through all the chaos Ashe worries about the people he cares about. As a student he would think of his siblings, and now he thought of you.

The hardest part was adapting to being alone...and keeping faith. It’s difficult to convince yourself that everything is okay when it isn’t

There’s a reason Ashe doesn’t frequently talk of his actions amidst those five years. He has done things he is not proud of, and experienced sensations he wouldn’t wish on anyone

He approached the monestary with little hope of anyone else showing. Only when Gilbert appeared did Ashe become lively. When he saw his highness’ with the professor he was ecstatic...then you appeared

and he felt his heart shatter. The arrows knocked themselves as he pushed through to your position on the field. He becomes a bit too overtaken from adrenaline

“(Y/N)! Y-you’re...you’re alive! Where have you been?!” *que almost being beheaded by an axe* “ O-oh! Right. Not the time, let’s finish this!”

Once settled in the monestary again you can find him in his room, looking over the old letter. He’ll wave it in your face with tears pricking his eyes. Ashe isn’t angry in the slightest but all those feelings of abandonment from the day you left resurfaced like new.

“When you left... I realized that nothing could be worse than the thought of living without you.”

Linhardt:

Lin. I’m certain you already know what I have to say. I won’t ask you to wait for me or give an empty apology. What i’m doing is selfish and I don’t hold any expectations for forgiveness. Albeit I do trust that you will live through this. You’re a tough guy whether you’ll admit to it or not; don’t let your inner sloth dominate over your responsibilities. I know you’ll do the right thing. -(Y/N)

Linhardt isn’t surprised in the slightest. He admits to not being the most involved boyfriend, but he knew you well. Perhaps more than you know yourself.

Contrary to everyone else seeing you two as a love-hate partnership, it was far more complex. You’re much more than a personal alarm clock to Linhardt and even in his more infuriating moments(*cough* drifting off during your dates *cough*)you always have his attention

“*sigh*...and there they go again. Leaving me to clean up their mess”

He predicted everything down to the last letter. From the moment you both relocated he could see that you were uncomfortable. Signing up for schooling did not equal agreeing to a draft. Linhardt observed the struggle but remained patient for you to approach him. While normally invasive he also respected your boundaries. There were other pressing matters to attend to in addition to both your personal issues.

He had been delegated to return home until further notice. It didn’t take much to piece together why you had left. With him gone there was no reason to remain, not with the army in its current state. Not when you could possibly be used as leverage or forced to fight on Edelgard’s side.

He was smart enough to realize it was only a temporary farewell.

Linhardt speaks of your departure to no one, and comes up with a stable alibi for when asked.To help indirectly, he tries to stall your missing status report for as long as possible. Your rashness didn’t give much leeway to get the story straight but he managed. It was a bit too troublesome for his liking though.

Troublesome, but worth it. You left unscathed and with the only evidence being his letter. Linhardt considered burning it; it was the logical solution after all. You probably expected him to do so after piecing together your coded message.

It stays with him, folded up and used as a bookmark for his personal tomes. It is always by his side for safe keeping.

When the reunion day draws near he departs from the estate, only taking his research and some valuables. He may not have foreseen to find the professor or the church duo, but you were anticipated.

“Well, look who it is. A runaway returned I trust?”

There is no animosity or sense of tension. He’s just as sassy and you bargained for no less. Like stated before, you both know each other well. He might comment on how you’ve changed or test your knowledge. You know, see if “you’ve slacked off” even though everyone knows he’s far more lax.

Don’t be fooled though. He may have helped because it was the easiest course of action, but do not expect to pull a stunt like that again. He refuses to wait another five years for a life of peaceful retirement. This is going to end soon so be prepared to act as his stressed out lab assistant again

192 notes · View notes

high-five-of-teenager-trashblog · 3 years

Text

Discography Discussion: We Hate All Kinds of Violence

If you’ve been following this blog for a while, you probably know quite a bit about H.O.T. I assume you have a favorite member. I bet you’ve heard tracks like “I-Yah” and “Hope”. But I haven’t really discussed the start of H.O.T in depth, nor the discography of their first album. After making you wait so long, let’s talk about how this influential group began.

Before H.O.T

In order to understand why H.O.T was created, we’ve got to understand Korean history.

(Note: As this blog is about one group and the point of this post is to talk about one album, I am leaving out a lot of notable events and people to give you a basic summary of what led to H.O.T.)

Up until 1988, South Korea had been constantly under oppressive political regimes. This oppression extended to music, which limited who could sing and what songs would be allowed to the masses. 1988 is a very important year in Korean history because that was when the country opened itself to the world and hosted the 1988 Seoul Olympics in Jamsil, Seoul. Through various political, economic, and technological changes, Korea was gradually transforming into what it is now. However, music was still largely either patriotic tunes or shallow love songs.

You know what came next. In the spring of 1992 Seo Taiji and Boys debuted. They had mass appeal among young people in Korea because they made music directed to people in Korea that was about their problems. Even though there was management involved with the group, it was entirely under the control of Seo Taiji - not some executive who dictated what the group could say and do. Also, they were not the first group in Korea to use rock music or rap, but the way Seo Taiji combined different genres and styles was very different - and very appealing. Bland dance and pop music produced by large broadcasting companies weren’t going to cut it anymore.

Generally speaking, whenever there is some kind of innovation, businesses and investors crop up looking to make a profit. The Korean music industry is no different. The rise of Seo Taiji and Boys created this essential question: Could a company recreate Seo Taiji and Boys?

The answer came in 1996.

H.O.T Pre-Debut

Before SM Entertainment, there was SM Studio. It was Lee Sooman’s first serious venture into starting a music company. In 1990, Hyun Jinyoung debuted as the first artist in the company and led to the start of several careers. Lee Sooman eventually signed on other artists, such as Yoo Youngjin in 1993.

However, Lee Sooman had seen the Japanese system of training idols and wanted to adapt that for Korea. Some things came out of this and became standardized in K-Pop (to some extent), such as idols of the same group living together and going through training for a period of time. This also changed how artists were managed and signed on. It went from being like MGM during Hollywood’s Golden Age to the “factory” idea we know now.

The first idols (and lab rats) for this were H.O.T. Kangta was the first to be recruited for his voice when Lee Sooman heard him sing at Lotte World. Heejun was asked to audition due to his ability to dance, sing, and write music. Woohyuk passed his audition as he was also a talented dancing. Jaewon’s recruitment isn’t well-known other than that he gained points for his visual appeal, however, sometimes people make claims that he was previously friends with Heejun and yet aren’t able to provide credible sources (at least that I’m aware of). Tony, however, auditioned with his friend Andy in LA and was voted in by the other four members. Lee Sooman has said that Tony didn’t have much going for him, but he recruited him because he thought the teenager would work hard. Together, these five were everything the public wanted.

Before H.O.T debuted, they were seen in public. Heejun and Kangta were dancers for Yoo Youngjin, and Jaewon and Woohyuk joined them later (I’m not sure if Tony did, however, considering how late he joined). The group even performed their debut song at a festival at Heejun’s high school. They were generating hype and ready to begin.

The We Hate All Kinds of Violence Album

H.O.T debuted on Sept. 7th, 1996. Their first album was called We Hate All Kinds of Violence. The cover art shows a person sitting on a step with their head in their arms in a way that usually denotes sadness or despair while wearing uniform with a hat that says “Workers”. The combination of group name, album title, and album artwork set the tone of the album at a glance as being geared towards teenagers. This was a smart move on SM’s part. Seo Taiji and Boys had disbanded earlier that year, so there was a void in the music industry that needed to be filled, and H.O.T seemed to fit the bill for a lot of young people in Korea.

Warrior’s Descendant

Their debut track was “Warrior’s Descendant”. Just hearing that title tends to interest people even before they hear the actual song. It gives off the impression that the song is about someone who has a fighting spirit like their ancestors, even if they themselves aren’t soldiers.

youtube

Lyrics (DISCLAIMER FOR THIS SECTION: TW: BULLYING)

The lyrics themselves are about bullying. The opening words are, “Ah~ Why are you hitting me?” (Lyrics Source) From there the lyrics are presented as though by the victim themselves asking why they’re being beaten up. Parts of the song seem to indicate that this isn’t a one-off thing, it’s something that’s been going on for a long time:

You changed me without a guilt You hit me Once we were friends You ruined me

I was beaten like a stupid idiot I lost everything and was roaming around Now with sounds of punch, steal and breaths My heart was torn already because of my lost friends

However, this person seems to believe that someone will save them and that this won’t go on forever.

It's time to stop, The violence, hate, and all the mess, It's about time someone should stand for what is right, That is right

Now I want my future that I've been dreaming of I think of everything can be back as it was before I trusted you I trust you once more Save me Someone someone can

Unfortunately, the song ends with the realization that no one is going save them. That someone can save them, but no one does.

Someone someone can,someone someone can, That I know it, That I know it, That I know it, Can Can That I know it, Someone someone someone someone someone can, someone can, someone can, someone can can can can can, But I know it won't happen, Now I give up everything; I have because of you. They ruined me, They took it all even my last hope You became my enemy and now I give you up They ruined me, They took it all even my last hope. I look for the hope; It's nowhere Now I'm gonna punish myself.....

The worst part of this is that the victim seems to be blaming themselves. They seem to think that they were at fault so they are going to give up. The last line itself, “Now I’m gonna punish myself” is especially troubling.

While you might have been hoping there would be a happy ending, this song wasn’t meant to have one. For a debut song that was supposed to target teenagers, this was a perfect introduction. Bullying is common everywhere, but it’s especially bad in Korea. If you’ve been a fan of K-Pop or K-Dramas for a while, you’ve probably heard a lot about this.

I think the reason why the song ends on a hopeless tone is because the song verbalized what a lot of kids and teenagers in that position probably feel like. Considering how many people follow this blog, I assume that at least one person reading this has been (or is currently being) bullied, so these words probably resonate with you.

And that is the point of “Warrior’s Descendant”, as it targets two groups of people. The first group of people are the ones being bullied, as it tells their point of view. The second group are the bystanders, as it calls them out for not doing anything about it. It calls for these two groups of people to look at each other and see that this isn’t just something that happens, bullying is a choice. The point of the lyrics is to tell people who are bullied that what they’re going through isn’t right, and to tell people to stop being a bystander and do something. This song was a call to action.

Also, the beginning of this song tends to get used in variety shows. However, I don’t think I’ve ever seen it used to match up with the context of the lyrics. Next time you hear this song somewhere, you might want to take note of the feeling the song brings to the situation it’s used for.

(End of bullying discussion)

This was actually the first song Yoo Youngjin produced, and led to his long and successful career with composing and producing music at SM Entertainment.

The MV

The music video itself shows a story between cutting to H.O.T singing and dancing. The MV opens with a teenage boy looking up while bloody, then cuts to people walking away from him - great hook. It quickly cuts to the night before when the guy was walking with a girl while carrying his violin case. Three guys around his age come and beat him up, and then go after the girl. When the guy sees the girl being targeted, he gets up to fight them off of her and she tries to defend him as well. It ends with the teenager bloody in the daylight with his broken violin. Maybe it’s just me reading into things, but it looks like the guy got beat up in the alley and then possibly got dragged to a school due to the building in the background.

It also has a very 90s style to it. Their outfits were purchased by the members themselves - I don’t know if SM had a stylist who told them what to get or if they were just given free reign, but they did have to pay for them. In addition to the outfits, there were some hallmarks of the time period in the music video, such as graffiti, which was a very popular aesthetic in the 90s and can also be seen in Turbo’s “Black Cat” MV.

Also, even though I haven’t heard anyone else agree with me on this, I personally feel like “Warrior’s Descendant” sounds like “Come Back Home” by Seo Taiji and Boys due to the vocals, instrumental, and tone. Considering that H.O.T was largely created as a response to Seo Taiji and Boys, I think it’s quite possible that recalling the other group was intentional.

However, “Warrior’s Descendant” is simultaneously where Seo Taiji and Boys ends and H.O.T begins.

Candy

Does this song really need an introduction? Probably not, so I’m just going to jump into it. This is H.O.T’s most well-known song and is beloved by many people even years later. It was also their golden ticket and get-out-of-jail-free card throughout their time promoting together.

youtube

This music video is iconic for so many reasons.

First up, the location is perfect for such a bright song. It was filmed at Lotte World in Jamsil, Seoul.

Now, you might be thinking to yourself, “Jamsil? I’ve heard of that place before” and you would be correct! That’s where the 1988 Seoul Olympic Games took place, and it’s also a huge part of H.O.T’s history. They had their 918 concert there in 1999, their last concert there in 2001, and their reunion concerts have been there because of the 2001 concert as well.

As for Lotte World itself, it’s one of the major theme parks in South Korea. H.O.T filmed in front of the famous merry-go-round and various other sites around the park. Fun fact: this is also where the drama “Stairway to Heaven” was filmed at.

When I was in Korea, I visited Jamsil quite a few times and it was one of my favorite places. You have no idea how excited I was when I went to the Olympic Park and saw the stadium in person. I also got the chance to visit Lotte World and ride on the merry-go-round, as well as walk on the outdoor bridge they danced on. If you’re an H.O.T fan, I highly recommend going there.

Choreography

The dance for this song is very iconic because it’s bouncy and fun. When I say bouncy, I mean that literally considering as Heejun’s favorite dance move involves him bouncing on the ground.

Trademark Colors

If you’ve been a fan of K-Pop for a while, you probably know that a lot of groups have their own color. The first group that had an official fan color (to my knowledge) was Seo Taiji and Boys, and their color was yellow. However, colors became more of a big deal for K-Pop groups because of H.O.T.

H.O.T’s official color is white, which is why you tend to see them wear white suits and their light stick is white. However, they also have an official color for each member. Heejun is yellow, Woohyuk is blue, Tony is red, Kangta is green, and Jaewon is orange. If you see merch of the group, you’ll often see these colors being heavily associated with each member, and you’ll often see fans cheering with their individual color as well as white.

These colors helped the public to easily identify who was who when they were rookies.

They also had different accessories. Woohyuk had his floppy hat with eyeballs attached to it - that can be seen on that light stick he teased. Kangta had a bag. Tony had a hat. Jaewon had earmuffs - which was a win because it was getting to be cold when this track was released. Heejun, however, had a visor which he hated due to it not keeping him warm in the winter, nor cool in the summer. Their fluffy outfits also endeared them to the public because of how cute they were.

Lyrics

So now that we’ve talked about all the visuals, let’s talk about what “Candy” itself is about. First off, the lyrics to this song are so painfully 90s and cheesy. The story is this: a guy plans on going on break (or breaking up) with his girlfriend because he realizes he’s not the best boyfriend and their relationship isn’t doing great. He literally decides that suddenly when he wakes up in the morning - you can’t make this up.

To be honest with you I want to see you today to talk about us to tell you that I need some space Please understand me I’m telling you that it was a difficult decision Actually, I thought of it this morning

He admits that it’s something he needs to work on and says:

I will need to change myself Without your knowing it I’ve compared you to other girls

There’s a part of the lyrics that are very angsty and dramatic.

When I dream about us each time the dream would vanish and I am left by myself Crying so pathetic stuck in this position I decided I’m leaving you! I’m leaving you! Although I still love you I will leave I will forget and stop loving you As I look to the sky above me I told myself I must keep my heart cold towards you

However, he eventually realizes that even though their relationship needs work, he loves her and actually doesn’t want to be apart from her.

I love only you I said this to you All that I had prepared to say turned backwards I’ll always be by your side

It finishes up with Kangta saying this:

I’ll always be by your side You’ll never be alone again I’m here next to you

The conclusion the songs comes to is this: There can be problems with your relationship, but if you really love them and want to stay with them, you need to communicate and work on making your relationship better.

Also, don’t make huge decisions rashly - I think that should be the big takeaway from this.

Like “Warrior’s Descendant”, this song is also used on variety shows quite a bit. I’ve even heard it called, “The Perfect Song for Valentine’s Day”. Considering the context of this song is essentially about a breakup (until the end), I have my doubts when it’s used on broadcasts that are trying to hype up a love line.

(Lyrics Source)

The Candy Consequence

Earlier I mentioned that “Candy” was their golden ticket. Now that you understand the song itself, let’s talk about why it is that way.

“Warrior’s Descendant” was very serious and geared towards teenagers. “Candy”, however, took their popularity and gave H.O.T a family-friendly reputation. It was the perfect combination of cute guys, a sweet song, and iconic visuals that helped the general public to differentiate them from other groups at the time.

While Seo Taiji and Boys were massively popular with Korea’s youth, they were often thought of as being rebellious, especially since they famously criticized various aspects of Korea - such as the education system.

If you’ve read my other Discography Discussions, you’re well-aware of what H.O.T has done over the years. However, unlike Seo Taiji and Boys, they weren’t as censored or thought of as being nearly as problematic. Why? Look no further than “Candy”.

The popularity “Candy” has is two-sided. On one side, it’s annoying because people (especially newer or international fans) tend to associate them with it, instead of the rest of their discography. On the other side, because people associate them with it first, they tend to be more forgiving (and ignorant >.>) whenever H.O.T released tracks that were full of profanity or violence.

While “Candy” is quite different from most of their other popular tracks, it was the one that allowed H.O.T to rise to heights no one had been expecting.

Other Tracks of Interest

You’re Fast, I’m Slow - This tends to be one of those songs that H.O.T fans know because it gets used in compilations and as background music. The lyrics themselves are about a girl hitting on a guy and trying to make their relationship go at a faster pace than what he’s ready for. He’s asking her to slow down so that they can have a good relationship. They’re just friends, but the girl clearly wants to be more.

A day or two has passed and you've changed too much You kept catching me off guard with your "non-PG" questions You teased me, saying that I didn't have any courage and I was such a boring guy

And before y’all ask, yes, he’s into her. Warning: Explicit

But you don't know my heart I want all of you Don't rush it too much I want to show you my heart slowly

I want to have you, Something that I've deeply wanted If you give me another chance, I'll take you tonight

I'll make you feel real good Even make you groan & moan like I know you should

Remember how I said “Candy” allowed them to get away with more explicit stuff? “You’re Fast, I’m Slow” is Exhibit A. Yoo Youngjin is too obvious sometimes.

(Lyric Source)

Your Image in the Sunset - This is basically your standard breakup song. I’m just pointing it out because I love the instrumental and how this song sounds, tbh. It really gives off a 90s feeling.

Another Stressful Day - This song is about a guy who has a hangover and has to get to work. The kicker is that the members were too young to legally drink when this came out. Considering that the guy on the cover is wearing a work uniform, it is possible that true context of the image is that he is hungover, not upset due to some violent circumstance.

The Age of Individual Characteristic - This song has a great message about self love and not judging people by their appearances alone.

just because you think you're ugly, don’t just sit at home staring into a mirror, accept a new change - find a unique characteristic about yourself..

please, don’t let love follow changing fashion.. don’t let it change.. a male wearing tight short shorts with long hair and a female wearing torn long jeans with a 'sports cut' hair.. lets help each others individual characteristics prevail..

(Lyrics Source)

About Women - This is the final track on the album. It’s basically H.O.T saying that they don’t understand women, but they respect them. It starts out with talking about stereotypes men have for women, and then goes into arguing about it. However, these are the parting words H.O.T concludes the track and the album with:

Women sometimes make our lives hard and confusing, but we have to remember they're not toys, They're not toys but real deep beings...

(Lyrics Source)

Conclusion

We Hate All Kinds of Violence was an excellent start for H.O.T’s career and a new era of Korean music. It was an album for teenagers by teenagers. Although a lot of their work has been forgotten over the years, it is certainly an important artifact that waits to be discovered by those it speaks to.

Where to listen to the album: iTunes Spotify

#h.o.t #high-five of teenager #kpop #k-pop #old kpop #Moon Heejun #kangta #Jang Woohyuk #lee jaewon #tony ahn #tw: bullying

27 notes · View notes

amphtaminedreams · 3 years

Text

COVID-19, Negligent Manslaughter, and a Timeline of Tory Indifference

“I feel sorry for Boris Johnson. He is doing the best he can in the situation and I don’t think anybody else could have done a better job.”

[exhibit A: a gem somebody that I’m Facebook friends with reposted earlier]

It’s a sentiment that I cannot quite wrap my head around. I sit here hopeless and furious and trying to hold back tears because it’s been almost a year since England first went into lockdown and yet here we are, almost 100,000 dead, in an even worse position than we were before whilst other countries begin to slowly return to normality. It is clear to me who is to blame for this, however there are a large proportion of people who don’t want to “politicise” the actions of the PRIME MINISTER with regards to his approach towards handling a virus sweeping the country he GOVERNS.

Typically, these kind of posts making the rounds on social media will be accompanied by some kind of photo of Boris Johnson looking somber as if to suggest that the way things have played out were beyond his control and that he is some kind of broken man beleaguered by the suffering he has, despite good intentions, inadvertently caused.

This one in particular of Johnson with his head in his hands is a staple. In reality, this is a photo taken back in 2018 whilst he was receiving flack from party members for comparing Theresa May to a suicide bomber (for her handling of Brexit, ironically) as well as from the papers due to his rumoured (now also proven, in a completely non-surprising turn of events, to be true) affair with his former aide, Carrie Symonds.

So let’s shut this narrative-where we should feel for Boris because he’s doing his best, and apparently a better job than anybody else could’ve done in his situation- down right here. In a supposedly developed country with one of the world’s largest economies, if we’re talking by proportion, our COVID-19 death toll is up there with the worst of them. It seems that every other state figurehead (bar a small handful), and I mean almost every single one of them, is doing a better job. People love to throw figures out there about how densely populated we are to combat damning statistics as if we haven’t got just as many factors playing to our advantage, as if it’s unfair to compare our response to Germany’s or Japan’s or Singapore’s (both of which are far more densely populated) or New Zealand’s or Vietnam’s, but we are an ISLAND with world-leading technology and infrastructure and healthcare equipment and professionals and a relatively high standard of living. In what world is almost 70,000 dead in a country with abundant time and means to prepare a response reflective of said country’s leaders doing a good job?

Apparently we’re supposed to believe that Johnson feels some sense of moral responsibility for this astronomical failure. A man who refuses to acknowledge the multiple children he has fathered outside of his marriages and who has had repeatedly engaged in affairs and one-night stands throughout said marriages. A man who continued to cheat whilst his most recent wife was receiving treatment for cervical cancer, for fuck’s sake. Yep, a real stand-up guy.

So where does this idea that Johnson must feel remorseful for this catastrophe come from? We haven’t seen a second of remorse or a hint of accountability for the lives lost from him nor any members of his cabinet. That much is really no surprise; I have this hypothesis, and it’s not a stretch, that these people do not have an ounce of empathy in their bodies. These ridiculously privileged, privately-educated individuals who have had everything handed to them their entire lives simply cannot put themselves in the shoes of the average working person and that is the problem. Unable to recognise that what distinguishes them from most others is little more than the luck of being born into wealth and the abundance of recourses and connections that has entailed throughout their lives, they see us as beneath them-as less intelligent, less driven, and thus less deserving of the status and respect they enjoy. They see us as a bunch of whining, unmotivated idiots who do not recognise the chokehold they have over our media nor the fact that everything they do is a desperate grab to keep money and power within the hands of a select group of people, an exclusive members club from which most of us are barred (just take a simple Google search and watch Jacob Rees-Mogg’s opinion of the Grenfell victims or the buried Johnson speech where he talks about how inequality is essential). They know that we will squabble amongst ourselves about who is to blame rather than wising up to the truth which is that every decision they make is fuelled by cronyism and the inability to make and follow through with difficult choices, the pandemic being no exception. The supposedly self-made elite see the life of the average working class person as having far less value than their own, and their parties actions over the last 10 years have made that very clear.

It was in December 2019 that the first case of COVID-19 was declared to the World Health Organisation and on March the 11th that they announced they considered it as a pandemic. In Wuhan, people were dying of pneumonia in their clusters. And what was Boris Johnson doing in this time? Well for starters, here in the UK we didn’t even have a pandemic committee-Johnson had scrapped it six months before. If years of benefits cuts and defunding of the NHS in favour of funding nuclear weapon programs, keeping British troops on other people’s lands, and tax breaks for the mega corporations that donate to their party didn’t convince you that the Conservatives have little regard for human life, them getting rid of this committee-whilst a pandemic has been declared year after year as the greatest threat to mankind-should have been the first sign of trouble. As if that wasn’t enough, he also skipped five of the COBRA (meetings are made up of a cross-departmental committee put together to respond to national emergencies and PMs routinely attend those pertaining to crises on the scale of COVID-19) meetings addressing the situation. Whilst other countries were closing their borders and stocking up on PPE, Johnson and his ministers were selling PPE abroad and simply telling people to wash their hands to the length of the tune of happy birthday. Their only policy was one of “herd immunity”, which was in fact not a policy but just an abandonment of their party’s public duty disguised as one, intentionally obfuscated with pseudoscientific jargon.

Even thinking the absolute worst of politicians you would hope that when it came to the point where the UK’s non-response to COVID-19 was becoming an international disgrace, Johnson and his ministers would take proper protective measures if only to save face. But when they eventually seemed to do so, it became clear that the priority was not the safety of the ordinary people affected by the virus. Outsourcing their test and traces system to companies such as Serco, Sitel, Deloitte and G4S rather than public health services, Conservative ministers could not resist attempting to line the pockets of their friends and benefactors in the process. According to the Guardian, instead of reaching out to the experts or using publicly funded services to handle COVID containment measures, the Conservative party has awarded a disgusting £1.5 BILLION WORTH of contracts to businesses with explicit connections to its MPs and donors, the majority of which lack any relative experience of the tasks they’ve been trusted to carry out. Unsurprisingly, the National Audit office found that when awarding contracts relating to the production of COVID-19 protection measures and treatment needs, there��was a “high-priority lane” for suppliers referred by senior politicians and officials; companies with a political referral were 10 times more likely to end up winning a government contract than those without. On top of this, it is not hard to draw a link between the late initiation of lockdown measures and preemptive openings of pubs and restaurants against scientific advice to the interests of frequent donors such as Wetherspoons owner Tim Martin. Even if one chooses to ignore the blatantly obvious correlation between the owners of the businesses whose profits were prioritised over safety concerns and the number of those owners who donate to the Conservatives, party officials at the very least were reluctant to follow the lead of many other countries in financing furlough schemes themselves and instead avoided this responsibility by using loose lockdown measures to leave it down to the discretion of small business owners, who couldn’t themselves afford to furlough staff, whether or not to stay open.

Time and time again, as the government flounder and fuck about, favouring personal desires to keep their powerful, high-paying jobs and to satisfy the corporate allies who make this possible, blame has been shifted from the public to care homes to NHS workers and back again whilst we, the public, make the biggest sacrifices of all under the illusion that we were being guided out of this pandemic rather than lied to and thrown under the bus. Whilst the elite continue to pick and choose what rules apply to them, it’s students and the elderly and the vulnerable paying the fines and scrabbling to afford basic living costs and hoping that they don’t lose someone dear to them.

Don’t get me wrong, a large proportion of the public have contributed to the spread too with their selfishness and entitlement and the arrogance it takes to develop a sudden refusal to acknowledge basic science from experts who have studied in the field their whole lives so that they can justify their need to go to the pub (speaking of, it’s absolutely HILARIOUS how many “mental health advocates” are suddenly coming out of the woodworks on football avi Twitter after they’ve spent years calling people on mental health Twitter attention seekers). And don't get me wrong, there were inevitably going to be casualties of this pandemic. But it didn't have to spread to this many people, and there didn’t have to be so many deaths due to a lack of preparation, and this wouldn’t have been the case if it weren’t for the inherent apathy of the Conservative party towards the lives of people of lesser status than them, the reluctance to put those lives before party interests. I wish I felt like there was an end in sight, I wish there was some positive takeaway from all of this, but even now, we continue to see corners being cut with the vaccine lauded as our saving grace and anti-maskers gathering outside hospitals to chant about how “oppressive” it is to be urged to wear a bit of cloth over their faces for the short periods of time in which they leave their houses and all I can think of is the selfishness that runs like poison through our country. It makes me sick and leaves me to question desperately where we go from here. I don’t like unanswered questions, I don’t like feeling politically directionless, and I don’t like the growing fear I have about the state of the world which seems to intensify every single day. In the UK at least, it’s starting to feel like nothing will ever change-we’re told we live in a democracy and yet mainstream media is owned by the people whose interest is to keep their Conservative friends in power. The stronghold they have over print media in particular allows them to continually get away with smearing and defaming every person who comes along and seems to want to actually help ordinary people, without being challenged, to the point where the only kind of “opposition” we’re left with promises nothing but a big boss approved tactical reshuffling of the status quo (which they call “electability”); it doesn’t feel like democracy when the majority of the country are being fed misleading information and convinced against voting in their best interests.

This is the result of that. The state we find ourselves in is the inevitable result of being manipulated into helping the elite build their protective wall whilst the rest of us scrabble to get in and step on each others heads along the way, the people inside shouting over that it’s those even more vulnerable than ourselves that are taking our places. Outside the wall, the earth is falling from beneath our feet, and instead of throwing over the ropes to help us out, the people inside are stockpiling them so they can secure their firm place above ground and then later flog the rest. How many more people have to die before we reach some kind of widespread realisation of that? Where do we go from here and what do we do? Well for one, we can stop spreading those god-fucking-awful textposts on Facebook and get our heads out of our arses. Wear our masks over and wear them over our fucking noses. Have some fucking consideration for others. Don’t wait til an issue affects you personally to give a fuck about it. AND START HOLDING THE FUCKING PRIME MINISTER AND HIS MINISTERS AND HIS ENTIRE PARTY AS WELL AS THE OPPOSITION MPS THAT HAVE SAT BY THE SIDELINES AND ALLOWED THIS TO GO ON WITHOUT PROTEST ACCOUNTABLE. That would be a good start.

I’m so tired. Things didn’t need to be this way, and yet because of the selfishness of the few, thousands upon thousands are dead. It’s not about “throwing around blame”, it’s not about “throwing around” anything, it’s about expecting a leader to do his best to protect lives. If that is “throwing blame”, let’s get things clear, I have no issue with hurtling it torpedo style at those who handed out a death sentence to so many in this country rather than do anything that might compromise their own privilege. Honestly, pass me the shovel after and I’ll happily bury the wreckage in the ground. Who wants to join?:-)

#rant #politics #anti capitalism #anticapitalist #covid-19 #covid #england #labour #socialism #fuck the tories #fuck the torys #fuck boris #rant post

17 notes · View notes

otomelavenderhaze · 4 years

Text

I was actually feeling pretty guilty in liking the “Seduce the Villain's Father” because of how the story starts off with a kidnapping and the marrying situation, that I will explain further. Not mentioning that Yenni, the female lead, has a real need to be around Eru, the male lead, if she doesn’t, she could die, like literally. Btw, spoiler alert ahead from the light Novel and the Manhwa.

So convenently and in a very pushy matter, everything on the plot try to tie them up together in the start.

The kidnapping and the marriage proposal from her part are the strings that tie Yenni and Eru together, so they would know one another better and actually fall in love. If wasn't for that, they wouldn't have spend any time together because, at first, there is no reason to. Then we found out that Yenni is sensitive to manaa and Erudian's devine's powers are the quickest and the harmless way to keep her from dying, since all she needs literally is stand besides him to get energized by it.

And basically that's when Yenni comes up with the marriage thing that I mentioned before, yep, she asks him to marry her numbers of times throughout the manhwa hoping that he could say yes... Because he is the perfect medicine for her condition and because she wants to save him... It's not because she is in love with him.

So the marriage for her is more a matter of convenience, than love. Which, I need to admit, bugged me so much at first.

But then I understood why they did it when I read the Light Novel and saw some of the spoilers.

Eru was bond to marry the real Villain from the history, Elard, for polititcal reasons. Elard’s plan is marry him for his divine power, so through their son, she could create a path that would lead her to control someone that has divine and dark power together (since she does have dark powers, that Eru KNOWS NOTHING OF). Her goal is reach the god’s world and be powerful. Of course, she would make their son kill his father, Eru.

Yep, my boi Erudian was bond to die by the ends of his own child, all planned by Elard that actually wants to kill Eru since the beginning.

Erudian is afterall, a direct descendent of the god Raulus, the being with the strongest divinity power and his children would also be born with those powers. That's what Elard wants, like I already said.

Yenni knows that, because that world actually belongs to a novel that she read in her previous life and got in by mistake after dying in another world (our world).

When she got into the novel’s world, she knew everything that could happen, everybody that would eventually die or suffer through it.

Starting for her pregnant sister that would be kidnapped by Eru, that kinapping would trigger a chain of events that would basically deeply hurt Yenni's new family and other characters around her, that she cares about because a) she read their sad story on her previous life and b) because now they're ppl that cares for her in this new life, so she cares for them too.

Interesting thing tho: Yenni should be a side-side-side character, she is a such minor character that none of those sad and hurtful events would actually harm her. So she could've lived a peaceful and good life if she wanted to.

DESPITE THAT Yenni, instead of letting Eru kidnapping her sister, hid her sister and tried to hide from him - but Eru actually found Yenni and kidnapped her, since his goal all along was just kidnapping someone from the royal family to use as hostage. I guess what he wanted was some vantage in an economic and political situation that Yenni's country created with his own, so that he would make tbe negotiations go his way.

I don’t know, the whole thing is complex, but I guess, Eru isn’t what you could exacly call as a good person or a benevolent Emperor.

He is actually kind of a jerk.

And problematic. I admit.

He never learned to have emphaty towards others, - since he became the Emperor in a young age and since he had no family around him that could've taught him how and care about something else besides the country’s political's interests.

With that, the romance was really settle in a weirdly way for me, very pushy, despite the art being so soft and the characters being really interesting, I was worried for where it would go from there.

Since yeah, Erudian is a jerk. Kidnapping. Marriage by convenience. Not really the most promising mix.

However, I think that Yenni is the character that really makes the difference on that type of plot.

She was really well placed and well thoughtout. Everything Yenni does comes from a base of personal interest, she have strong motivartions for everything, she’s quite brave too despite the weakness of her body and petite figure.

But most than anything, Yenni feels strongly responsible towards those characters because of what she knows all the awful/harmful things that could come out from the plot without her interference. And since he’s the only one that really knows the extension of their traumas, she feels responsable for doing something about it, not only for them, but also for herself.

Look, Eru won't always act like a hero, but Yenni always acts like one.

She isn't a genius, her plans fails and she don't really get always the outcome that she wants, but Yenni don't stop trying, because it's not only about Erudian's survival, it's about her survival too, it's about not letting someone meet a horrible fate when you have the means to do something about it.

Even so Yenni isn’t hopeless good.

She chooses to act upon the things that she knows that going to happen.

She isn't pushed towards it only for morality, it's for survival, it's for taking the chance and making a choice for the a better outcome, because despite being kidnapped by Erudian and him not being the most benevolent Emperor, dying by the hands of your own alienated/corrupted child and letting that same child be born to hurt her sister's baby girl (the actual heroin of the Light Novel that Yenni read before), is out of question to her.

But I will give it to Eru: everything he does towards Yenni is actually a reaction of things that he observe her doing.

He starts to take the action only after taking a like for her as a person. He doesn't care for her just because. He cares because she is something that he feels responsible for, someone that depends on him (since he was the one that kidnapped her) in a more personal matter than the rest of his subjects.

Yenni, on the other hand, since their first encounter, make him step back with every action and choice that she makes.

Yenni shaked his whole world with her determination, honesty and endearing careless manner, he sees everything good on her, everything he lacks himself and he loves it.

There is a moment on the Light Novel when even Yenni's plan of make Erudian marry her starts to backfire, because she actually starts to fall in love for real for him.

And the story progress to a point where: a) Yenni could be cured of her sickness without actually having to marry Erudian to do so; b) When Eru actually learns that Elard is trying to harm him and will not marry her no matter what and c) Yenni has the chance to come back to her country and be free from Eru and never having to meet him again if she wants to.

Despite that, and maybe because the same circumstances that put them together starts to force them to be apart, they actually do the last step to be together.

That's when their first kiss happens. When the ppl that are meant to take Yenni back home are at their doors and Erudian is thorn for having to be apart from her, because, dammit, he loves her already.

Erudian fells in love for Yenni, cuz she is harmless, he can relax around her and she actually makes him feel like having a good time, because she is so cheerful, always teasing and playing around, so different from how anyone has ever treated him, that he simply fell for her.

From Yenni’s side, Eru is actually far more unpredictable, far more fun and far more caring than she expected him to be, not mentioning that he is quite helpless without her, which is so cute as well.

So they get apart from one another by 2 years on the light novel.

On those two years they only exchange latters. Yenni has no obligation to marry Erudian and she is out of his hands, despite that, and despite having plenty of suitors around her, Yenni still chooses Erudian.

So he tries to propose to her this time (WHAT GOES AROUND COMES BACK AROUND, SON), despite Yenni’s country having nothing that could be beneficial to his country and despite her family hating his guts (haha, karma).

And just like that, they fixed the main issues of the story.

Mind you, this will happen in THE MIDDLE of the Manhwa.

Maybe the writer was mindful of all those plot's issues since the start, all the things that ppl are sick of and so many other Manhwas have no issue on doing, the writer decided to actually fix while delivering character's and relationships development.

I just love this surprise, I love Yenni's journey for survival, love and pursuit for her own happy ending. How everybody points her to be the weakest, but she still stands for what she wants and believe to be right, how brave and kind she is despite of being so powerless and how she changed everything around her, how she saved herself and the ones around her.

I saw a lot of ppl calling her clingy and boring, just because she isn't a villainess, but they failed to see that woman is normally perceive as the weakest and that's when we can take the stand and show our strongest resolves. That's why I loved the story so much.

I'm still so obsessed with it, I can't wait to see everything in the manhwa that btw, still has a really long way to go, even the light novel trasnlating still hasn’t catch up with all the spoilers that I caught on by other’s ppl translate from random events from the light novel in korean - that is done for what I heard of, the autor is just releasing side stories now.

It's a really good, strong and heartwarming love story, I love all the characters, I love how everything changed it's flow accordingly with the changes that Yenni caused and the new choices that all the characters made. It's shows that it's never too late to change, to take action and find happiness through diversity and pain.

Maybe that's why I'm so invested on it, because Yenni's and Erudian's love surprised me in the best of ways.

#Seduce the Villain's Father #personal #mahwa

66 notes · View notes

michtimadhura · 3 years

Text

MAJNU (Lover)

This is not my story. I’ve taken this plot from Ajeeb Dastaans on Netflix and tried to modify it

Heart pounding out of rhythm and hormones taking over her body, Lipakshi sat in her royal bedroom in her extravagant red wedding lehenga. Her nervous emotions were all over the place, exerted due to the wedding yet handling herself with grace, she waited for her husband. The door opened and Deepraj walked in, but his steps stopped all of a sudden. He stood at the entrance in his cream sherwani and sandpaper rough face, hesitant about her reaction yet quite firm about his decision. “ I’ve married you only because my father told me to…I am in love with someone else so I can’t love you and neither can I give you any children. Let us consider this marriage a sacrifice between 2 political parties for money and power.”, he stated this as loudly and bluntly as he could. But Lipakshi wasn’t just going to let go, gathering her most savage poker face, she said, “You men will always remain hypocrites…if you are going to cheat me in the very start of our marriage, well… then get ready to be cheated on”.

Deepraj walked out of the room leaving Lipakshi in a puddle of tears. She spent hours crying her eyes out until she couldn’t take it anymore. She had realized that this marriage was nothing but a deal between her MP father and a mafia boss. Her feelings were played by her father’s politics but she wasn’t among the ones who live a hopeless life lost in sadness when there’s no hope visible. Her decision was finally made, she was going to avenge everything that had happened to her. She did not care about life or death anymore and started seducing Deepraj’s mafia men. She started having affairs with them. Men who were genuinely loyal to Deepraj ignored Lipakshi’s behaviour and those who weren’t, started dating her or asking her for sex. But none of them lasted for more than 3 days because DING DONG, you can mess with demons but you cannot mess with Satan himself. Deepraj always caught them and like a true mafia boss he didn’t even flinch before taking their lives. As time passed, experimenting while killing his own men became his new hobby.

Months passed and so did years, Lipakshi’s grudge against her husband was not a news anymore. Everything was going on as usual until one fine day when “he” came. That one fine day was situated in the summers of May. Lipakshi was sitting on the huge swing in her front yard peeling a Mango while Deepraj sat miles away from her. Resting on his armchair with his feet slightly grazing the grass, he spoke to his driver, “Babloo, isn’t your son coming back today?” Babloo’s chest swelled with pride, “Haa sahabji, he is already here. He flew back from London yesterday. But he’ll soon be leaving for USA to start his new job…he’s gotten a job for 1.5 million dollars over there…” Deepraj cut Babloo off, “Uh…what was his name again?”

“His name’s Rajkumar, but Raj feels more modern na…so he’s switched to Raj nowadays”

“Acha?..a few years in a foreign country has changed him so adversely”

“It’s not the way you’re thinking……”

“Invite him over someday. Even I want to see how big he’s grown now.”, Deepraj cut Babloo off.

Out of nowhere, Lipakshi entered this small meeting, fed her husband a slice of mango and left without even bothering to start a conversation. She really was one hell of a savage.

“Ha Babloo, even I want to see your son”, said Ranjhesh, Deepraj’s right hand who was sitting right next to him to break the awkward silence after Lipakshi left.

“Jaroor sahabji…I’ll invite him over”

Half an hour later an army green coloured jeep entered the front yard. It stopped right near Lipakshi’s swing. A 6 feet figure got out from the jeep, “Raj beta!”, Babloo shouted from the other side of the front yard lawn. Raj adjusted his denim jacket over his shoulder and started walking towards his father only to glance at Lipakshi who caught his eye and winked at him. Raj got flustered for a moment but then regained his posture and resumed walking towards his father. “Namaste bhaiyya”, he said to Deepraj while touching his feet. “Welcome to our village Raj”, Deepraj said with a semi-smile while holding Raj by his arms. “Rajkumar is okay sahabji”, Babloo muttered. “Arey Nahi Babloo …he is a city man now, Rajkumar won’t suit him”.

Raj reached his pocket to take out a little transparent box. “Bhaiyya, I bought this Rolex for you”, he said as he handed that glistening box over to Deepraj, “Thank you bhaiyya, thanks a lot for everything that you’ve done for me and my family, especially when baba was in the hospital”

Ranjhesh found this suspicious “You know that Deepraj was the one who broke your father’s leg, right?”

“Yes, he did. But dad deserved it and Bhaiyya’s done so much more to help us that it outweighs everything. Also, I like to return people’s favours with even more fervour”, Raj said without any sign of hesitation.

“You’ll be waiting for dinner today, right Raj?”, Deepraj asked as if commanding him to stay for dinner.

“Sure, I’ll never refuse this honour”, Raj said.

“Hey Raj! This is Lipakshi, Deepraj’s wife”, Lipakshi said as she gave Raj a weirdly touchy hug. She wasn’t going to miss out on this guy, was she?

The atmosphere shifted 180 degrees to being extremely awkward and suffocating as Lipakshi kept staring at Raj who preferred to face the ground instead of facing Lipakshi.

“Namaste bhabhi”, he said looking down.

“Raj, why won’t you look at me?”, Lipakshi asked using her best baby voice.

“The right to look at you only belongs to Deepraj bhaiyya, bhabhi”, Raj replied trying to avoid eye contact.

Anger and the lust for revenge shot up in Lipakshi’s brown orbs as she locked eyes with her husband. “The only regret is that your bhaiyya doesn’t know the value of this right”, Lipakshi said as she reached Deepraj and gave him a little peck on the cheek which was meant to be more of a taunted slap.

Dinner was served hot and tasty that day. Deepraj, of course, sat at the centre of the dining table. Everything was going smoothly, dinner was midway over when Deepraj started talking, “So … Raj, I have an offer to make to you”, Deepraj sounded rather nervous, “ha bhaiyya, bolo na”, Raj said. “Well, I have a job offer for you, would you like to work right here for me, would you like to handle my business for me?”

“But bhaiyya… I already have gotten a job in the US… and I am leaving soon”

“Then tell them you won’t be joining. That job might be great, but I think you should think about staying here too. My business is quite huge right now and with you here to help me…who knows what we would accomplish.”

“But bhaiyya…”

“We all are a big family, right and what in this world is better than working with and helping your family. The company owns worth more than 500 million dollars of shares in the US market. Acha, I promise you a 4-million-dollar salary here. Now….don’t tell me that didn’t convince you”, Deepraj cut Raj off in a rather dominating manner.

Dollars flashed in Raj’s eyes. He took about 10 minutes to speak up and finally agreed with an “Okay bhaiyya”

Rest of the dinner progressed quietly.

Raj’s father was absolutely disappointed with his decision. “I worked hard to send you to the US just so you could come back here and join this slavery! Are you also going to serve those bastards for the rest of your life? Are you going to serve the same people who broke your baba’s leg? Do you even have any idea about what you’ve done?!”, he shouted at Raj as soon as he heard about Raj’s decision. “Baba, do you even know how much money 4 million is! It’s more than 100% of what the US people are offering me.”, Raj said his last words rather hastily as he left for the terrace. Raj’s bungalow had a clear view of Deepraj’s mansion.

He shared a cigarette with his local friend Badraa as they chatted about the village’s happenings.

“Rolex watch for that bastard and nothing for your yaar, ye kya Insaaf Hai bhai!”, Badraa pouted. “Choop baith, I don’t want to hear another lecture from you. The Rolex is fake, that man doesn’t even deserve a hit from my shoe. Also, what’s up with Deepraj’s wife?”, Raj asked. Even a dog is a king inside his own house, no matter how well he was fed at Deepraj’s mansion, he loathed him with every single nerve inside his body. “It’s been about 2 years and she’s not even pregnant. Now that tells you a lot about their marriage. Nahi toh, you know how fast Deep bhaiyya is”, more and more chuckles followed as they stared at the so-called “Deepraj mansion” under the starlit sky gossiping about the what-nots of the village.

Raj’s knowledge about stock exchange was remarkable and so was his willingness to work hard. He used to stay up late at Deepraj mansion to get his work done. Deepraj’s not-so-disciplined company had joined hands with the disciplined efforts of Raj, hence it did receive multiple rewards. In no time, the company started booming with money as Raj brought about 250 million worth of profit. Raj had now become Deepraj’s most trusted underdog, he was trusted even more than Deepraj’s own right hand Ranjhesh. As of Lipakshi, well, she had fallen head over heels for Raj and Lipakshi being Lipakshi never stopped her efforts. She used to flirt with Raj all the time and Raj being the most loyal underdog always ignored Lipakshi which was the most important factor fuelling the trust between Raj and Deepraj. He used to stare at Lipakshi when Deepraj wasn’t around but never did he ever manage to speak a word with her. He knew how big of a deal it was to flirt back with that lady until the day arrived when he mustered up the courage to do so.

One day, Deepraj was leaving for Lucknow for some work, “Raj, we need to attend some important business in Lucknow tomorrow. The Range Rover is already cleaned and washed, get ready at 7:00 am tomorrow morning. We need to leave as soon as we can” “Deep bhaiyya”, Raj put on his puppy face as he walked towards him, “Bhaiyya…actually I’ve got some important work to do here…so I won’t be able to accompany you. Instead Badraa will join you for the trip. Will that be fine?” “Acha thik Hai… you sure you’re not coming?”, Deepraj sounded a bit desperate for Raj’s company. “Sorry bhaiyya, I really have got a lot to do right now”, Raj rejected him with the softest words that he could gather. The night ended with deep talks over beer for the 2 of them… Deepraj went to sleep quite early. The next day arrived and Deepraj left early in the morning.

It was supposed to be a bright sunny day but the weather was quite windy and moist that day. Windows of Deepraj mansion were banging against each other as strong wind blew by. But it seemed like a fine day for Raj to make his first move on his so-called “Bhabhi”. He entered the mansion at lunchtime. Lipakshi was working out in her bedroom in her sports bra and yoga pants and the weather got steamier when Raj entered the room in his white shirt and black fitted pants. Lipakshi noticed his steps from far away and switched to squats. Raj finally entered the room and all that he could do was to stare at Lipakshi’s sultry figure. Lipakshi ignored him, continuing her squats. There was pin drop silence in the room but it wasn’t awkward, heat was building up in both of their bodies. Raj didn’t even dare to open his mouth, he tried muttering “Lipakshi” but when he couldn’t, he finally gave in. The spontaneity of the moment was too much to hold on to, Lipakshi just couldn’t hold herself back from the six feet, handsome meal standing right in front of her. She finally stopped her workout and turned towards Raj. “ahh, you men …aren’t you the greatest hypocrites of the world?”, she said as she held Raj by his collar. The first move was finally made and Raj was all ready to do his part. Clothes were torn, undergarments were destroyed, kisses were smothered, love bites were engraved on both of their bodies. Lipakshi was her happiest self now, she had finally found somebody with whom she could share a part of herself. But she was so, so afraid of getting caught this time, that she took every precaution possible to hide her beloved from the rotten eyes of her husband.

Lipakshi and Raj’s relationship had started growing beyond their sex. Their relation had grown into something beautiful and memorable. Deepraj spent most of his time outside the mansion which gave these lovebirds even more private time. But the best days were spent every time Deepraj left for Lucknow for 2–3-day trips. Raj used to find various excuses to avoid these trips but Deepraj never suspected him about doing something malicious behind his back. Trust really does take up the best out of a person.

It was one of those nights when Deepraj was off to Lucknow and the whole mansion belonged to Raj and Lipakshi, their bodies were tired after a long session of love making. Lipakshi was resting in Raj’s arms and she decided to start a very deep conversation with him. “Raj, you know that I love you, right?”, she said but Raj straight away ignored her question “I am tired of living in this mansion, being the wife of a stranger and longing for you all the time. I am soon going to book 2 tickets for us so that we could elope to somewhere peaceful. Where do you want to go?”, another question was ignored but Lipakshi continued,” I’d love to explore Shimla with you. But it’s okay for me if you want to go somewhere else. We can finally find our happily ever after there…Oh my god, I’m so excited, good days are finally on the way! But Raj”, Lipakshi’s tone suddenly grew serious, “Are you willing to leave everything for me….do you really love me?” Raj was quite hesitant but he composed himself enough to say, “sure darling, whatever you say, I’ll be there right beside you.”

A year later…

A year had passed since Raj had joined Deepraj’s company and summer was back to its best. Deepraj was returning from one of his Lucknow trips. It was 12:00 am already and he pulled up his rover in the parking lot. Exhausted due to the journey, he started unlocking the door, and stumbled upon something. He saw a khaki envelope sitting right underneath his feet. He opened up the envelope only to find some photographs he was too tired to look at.

The next day at the mansion was a lazy one. Deepraj relaxed on his armchair as he bathed in the vitamin D filled sun. He opened the envelope of photographs and he couldn’t believe what he saw next. The photographs were of Lipakshi and her new lover. Getting such photographs anonymously was nothing new for him, but this time the photographs enraged the hell out of him. Lipakshi snogging other men was morning tea but the person she was snogging immediately raged him up.

How did this little fuck even dare to look at my wife? he thought to himself.

He immediately called Raj and told him to come over to the mansion at 8:00 pm, “Bhaiyya…actually my parents are leaving today so I need to send them off. Is it okay if I join you at breakfast tomorrow?”, Raj said

“Nahi Raj. You can come after sending your parents off. Any time after 8 is fine with me. Tonight, I need to discuss something very important with you. You’ll come, won’t you?”

“Jaroor bhaiyya, I’ll be there as soon as I can”, Raj ended the phone call only to get another one from Lipakshi.

“My beloved husband is too tired to even move a muscle, he’ll soon fall asleep that’s when I’ll be packing my bags for tomorrow’s train at 6:00 pm. The tickets are already booked. It’s time for our ‘together forever’ now”

“Ah ha…my monster seems too excited today”, Raj teased Lipakshi.

“Raj, I am Hella serious about this, I’ll be waiting for you at 5:30 on the platform. You’ll come na… won’t you?”

“Sure baby, let’s meet at the platform tomorrow, done it is, I love you “

The phone call ended and the remaining day went by quickly.

It was 11 pm when Raj arrived at the mansion. Deepraj was sitting on Lipakshi’s swing with a beer in his left hand while his right hand balanced himself on the swing. His plain white kurta was stained due to his tears and they were rolling down his eyes continuously. Overall, he seemed to be in a pretty horrible state. “Bhaiyya!”, Raj exclaimed as he saw his bhaiyya’s condition “Kya Hua bhaiyya, why are you crying?” “Don’t call me bhaiyya …please”, he said while grabbing Raj’s hand. He leaned in to give Raj a tight hug which made Raj extremely awkward, Deepraj then got even closer trying to kiss Raj on his lips and that’s when Raj reached his limits. “Bhaiyya what is happening…please tell me”

“Tum hi ho yaar Raj” Deepraj said as his tears turned into waterfalls, “You are the only one who loves me for who I am. You might wonder why me and Lipakshi are not able to have kids right?”, Deepraj said out of nowhere.

“Nahi bhaiyya aisa kuch Nahi Hai…”, Raj tried to explain but he was cut off by Deepraj as always.

“Ruko Raj. Let me talk now. Let me tell you about all the hurt I’ve been carrying over my shoulders all this while. I was a very different child since childhood, an introvert and a completely opposite person than what I am now. There was this boy called Saumya whom I loved. We were a couple since high school. He was my best friend and my life partner. He was the only close person I had opened up to until my father saw us together, making out in the back of a car and that was the end of our story. My father then locked me up and forced me to marry Lipakshi for some bullshit political alliance and as of Saumya, till date I have no idea about what happened to his family or him. Life ended the moment my dad separated us from each other. You tell me Raj; how can I satisfy a stranger woman for whom I don’t even feel anything. Hence, I decided not to have any children of my own. Baba died without having any grandchildren but his punishment still lives on. Lipakshi never stopped being a pain in the ass. But in the midst of all that was going on… I found you Raj, I finally found my happiness. I found my peace. Work has been so much fun since the day you joined my company. I loved spending time with you, may it be discussing business strategies while working or just having deep talks over beer late at night. It took me so long to realize how madly I was in love with you”, Deepraj said as he gently placed hand on Raj’s, “I love you Raj, I love you to the moon and back and I want us to be together, I want to make this work”, Deepraj lifted their intertwined hands together. Tears were welling up in Raj’s eyes as if he was desperately waiting for this moment to arrive. Raj pulled Deepraj into a tight embrace.

“Ek aur baat”, Deepraj said without breaking the embrace, “your friend Badraa seems quite interested in Lipakshi. I never even imagined that dumbfuck to be so brave.”, Deepraj said pointing towards the photographs on the table. “He really did dare to make a move on my wife. And according to what Ranjhesh heard, they are both going to leave the town using the 6'oclock train tomorrow. But I am going to end this torture, once and for all. I am going to teach Badraa the biggest lesson of his life tomorrow. But I need your help. Will you help me Raj?”, They finally made eye contact. “Have I ever said no to you Deep? Batao, how can I help you?”, Raj said.

“I need you to kill Lipakshi”, a moment of silence followed as Deepraj completed his sentence.

“Ha….Even I want to eliminate that nasty woman out of our life”

Our life? He really does love me, Deepraj thought.

“I’ll be there at the station and I will be the only one to witness her struggle for the last breaths of her life. I’ll kill her right when she reaches the station to catch her train”, Raj said without showing even an inch of hesitation. Raj and Deepraj had spent loads of nights together in the front yard but this one hit different. Every embrace felt short as time passed. Tomorrow was going to be a big day in both of their lives, so their little get together didn’t last too long.

Lipakshi’s doomsday had arrived. She packed her suitcase and escaped her house using the backside gate. The moment she stepped foot out of that house, she felt like the freest bird in the world, just the way it was before she got married. Lipakshi started her journey towards the station as Deepraj was beating the shit out of her presumed new lover Badraa who begged for mercy even though he had done nothing wrong. For the first time in his life Deepraj felt happy, not because he was punishing someone, but for the fact that he was going to be happy for the rest of his life now. He was going to live a life he had always dreamt about. He received a WhatsApp message from Raj right and he stopped everything that was going on and opened the message only to find a video clip. Like every lover in this world, he was quite curious what that might be about so he opened the message.

“Hey Deepraj, I am recording this as I leave for another country. Surprised, aren’t you? Maa and baba are right beside me. You want to see them? Hey maa baba, say hi to the camera for me please”, Raj’s parents waved to the camera with a wide smile having no idea about what their son was doing. The camera again switched to Raj. “Well let me tell you a little something, I was the one who sent you those photographs. And my god, I was so damn sure you would believe them and believe, you did. Bhaiyya”, Raj chuckled as he used his baby voice, “how could you not know there’s something called photoshop in this world. That guy in the white shirt wasn’t Badraa, it was me. So, leave my friend alone please. Also, ain’t I a pretty good actor? For what I did yesterday, I seriously do deserve an Oscar. Ohh… before I forget, let me remind you that I’ve taken all my profit money. Those 250 million dollars belong to me, not you dickhead so don’t panic when you find your account empty. And don’t you dare try to find me… even though you won’t be able to do that even in 1000 lives. This is the reward you get for breaking my father’s leg for no fucking reason, for hurting my family, for pulling generations and generations of my family into being a slave for you, for disrespecting my father, for trying to ruin my life with your “better job offers”, for not even letting your own wife be happy. You deserve everything that has happened to you. You deserve your sadness bhaiyya, YOU DESERVE IT”

Deepraj went blank after what he saw and Badraa took that moment to escape before anything much horrible could happen to him. Deepraj fell to the ground out of shock. He just wanted to fade out of existence. He wanted to go back to his real happy times. He wanted to go back to Saumya. His feelings were too genuine. He had been played once again. It was as if there was no end to his pain so he decided to kill his emotions.

If not Raj, then let it be me who kills Lipakshi. I just can’t stand the sight of her anymore.

Deepraj loaded his gun as he left for the station. It was 6:30 pm already and the train had left the station. There was pin drop silence everywhere as this was the last train for the day. Deepraj saw a silhouette from far away and assuming it was Lipakshi, he started walking towards her. He knew for a fact that Lipakshi won’t leave by herself. She was sitting on a bench and she stood up when she saw Deepraj. “You must be feeling so happy, right?”, she said as tears gathered in her eyes. Deepraj took no time in pointing the gun at her. “oh… so you’re here to kill me”, she regained her posture, “Maarna Hai to maar daalo mujhe… even I don’t wish to live with a husband like you. Even I am tired of living this loveless life” Deepraj pressed his gun hard into her skull but he just couldn’t find the courage to pull the trigger. She might not have helped him through his heartbreak but she had always been the one to stand right beside in these 2 years. Deepraj collapsed into the ground and so did Lipakshi. Death was all she wanted, but how can a person who is already dead from the inside kill her. Tears flowed and the only thing Lipakshi managed to day was, “I am pregnant” and at that moment Deepraj Raj’s words resonated in his mind “ I like to return people’s favours with even more fervour.” Raj’s favour was too much for Deepraj to handle but what else could he do than face it all, after all, he did deserve his sadness right?

#ajeeb daastaans #wierd stories #life is wierd #lovers #bollywood #michtimadhura #short story #netflix

3 notes · View notes

jumukus · 4 years

Text

A3! Event: Bridal Concerto Chapter 6-10 Translations

Translations under the cut.

Izumi: (Before we know it, the Wedding Fest day is here already.)

(I ended up getting here late due to all the paperworks I had to fill out… I should hurry and join the others.)

Itaru: Oh, there you are, Director-san.

Izumi: Itaru-san, hello. It must be hard on you, right? You need to help run the event too.

Itaru: Well, yeah. They let me prioritize the performances though, so I'm not that busy.

Izumi: I see… that's great to hear.

I'm glad the weather is nice today, a favorable weather for a festival.

Itaru: Though last night, I heard there would be a sudden rain today. I hope it's wrong.

Izumi: Oh, really? That's surprising, since the sky is so clear now.

Itaru: The others are currently preparing in the dressing room. You can go there first. I'll join you later.

Izumi: Got it. See you later, then.

Citron: You're finally here, Director!

Izumi: Hey guys! Wow, that suit looks good on you, Citron-kun.

Citron: Thanks!

Izumi: So Juza-kun will go on stage in that attire?

Juza: Yeah. Considering the theme I'm assigned to, they said it's best for me to wear this.

Azuma: Fufu, going on stage in a jersey feels somewhat fresh.

Izumi: Huh? Azuma-san, that outfit…

Azuma: Oh you noticed? This is Orin's costume.

Izumi: It's certainly the perfect costume for your role this time.

Azami: It's too impressive, though.

Izumi: The makeup is perfect too. I expected no less from Azami-kun.

Huh? Where's Muku-kun?

Azami: He's receiving an explanation from the staff at a different room now. He said he's gonna return soon.

Izumi: Oh, okay. Is he at the waiting room over there? I'm going to go take a look.

Muku: Hmmm, the dressing room should be over here I believe…

(I still can't believe my costume is a dress…)

Leila: Oh my? Are you perhaps Citronia-sama's…

Muku: Ah… Hello.

Leila: Now that I think about it, I haven't introduced myself. My name is Leila.

Muku: I'm Mu… Kurumi Sakisaka*.

Leila: Nice to meet you, Kurumi-san.

By the way… your dress is so lovely. It suits you so much.

Muku: Ahaha… thank you…

(She seems like a very polite and affable person… Am I really going to compete with this person…)

Leila: ...Just letting you know, I'm not going to hand over Citronia-sama to someone fresh from the country like you.

I've been in love with Citronia-sama much longer than you…

Muku: ...Uhh… can I ask you something?

Leila: What is it?

Muku: How did you meet… Citron-san?

Leila: …

I first met that person…

...And that is why I'm not going to let you win this battle.

Muku: --.

Leila: Oh my, it's about time for the contest.

Let's fight fair and square. See you.

Muku: …

Izumi: Oh, Muku-kun! So you're here!

Muku: Ah… Director-san.

Izumi: I heard you were in the participants' waiting room, so I went there but I didn't find you. It made me wonder if something happened.

Muku: I'm, I'm sorry. I was about to go back to the dressing room, but I got lost halfway.

Izumi: Oh, I see.

Muku: …

Izumi: ...Muku-kun?

Muku: N-No! It's nothing!

Izumi: ?

Juza: ...Muku… Muku?

Muku: Eh?

Ah, what's the matter?

Juza: No, it's just… you've been spacing out. What's up?

Muku: No, it's nothing.

Itaru: It's almost time for us to go onstage. I'll be counting on you all.

Azuma: Okaay.

Citron: Fighting!

Muku: ...

T/N: 1. Instead of 向坂 which is his real family name, Muku used 咲坂 here. Both read Sakisaka.

MC: Let the game begin! We shall open the curtain to the highly-anticipated event, "Best-of Three Bride Contest"!

We have a gorgeous lineup of participants here, such as a guest from that Kingdom of Zahra.

Let's give round of applause to them along with the dresses they adorned in!

*applause*

MC: Now, please welcome the ones who are going to help the participants act out all kinds of situations!

Members of MANKAI Company!

Juza: Hello.

Itaru: It's an honor for me to able to be everyone's co-star.

Azuma: I really can't wait to see how the beautiful brides will correspond to my dialogues.

Spectator A: Chigasaki-san, you're so beautiful…!

Spectator B: That man is sturdy and cool! Damn, I should have participated in the contest.

Spectator C: The one wearing kimono is a guy, right!? He's really pretty…!

Citron: As expected of Itaru! He's really popular among the company's staff members.

Azami: Looks like Juza-san and Azuma-san are gaining popularity too.

Izumi: I'm looking forward to see their performance as the participants' partners.

MC: Let's move on to the first round right away! The situation you're going to act out is…

"Showing appreciation to your husband who has just returned from work"! Your partner for this round will be Chigasaki-san!

Itaru: I'll be in your care.

Spectators: Kyaaa!

Izumi: (What a refreshing smile… That's Itaru-san for you…)

MC: The first contestant for this round will be… our special guest from Zahra Kingdom, Leila-san!

She seems to be really fluent at Japanese, so we sure are wondering what kind of performance she will show us!

Well then, start!

*applause*

MC: Thank you very much! That was a wonderful performance!

Even the spectators are giving nice reaction~.

Azami: Heh… that person did quite a good job.

Izumi: She sure did.

(She carried herself in a regal way despite being on the stage. She has courage…)

MC: Let's move on to the next contestant, Kurumi Sakisaka-san who looks beautiful in dress!

Muku: I-I'll be in your care!

…

Itaru: ...Muku? You good?

Muku: Y-Yes! I'm fine!

MC: Let the performance begin!

Itaru: "I'm home."

Muku: "Welcome home. You must be tired today."

Itaru: "Yeah, thanks."

Muku: "I've prepared your bath, and cooked your favorite pork ginger for dinner tonight."

Itaru: "Really? Just when I wanted to eat that… Thanks, I'm happy."

Muku: "You've been busy with work these days, after all… I'm sure you'll feel better if you eat a lot."

"Fufu, I've prepared some desserts too. Look forward to it, 'kay?"

Spectator A: That was so cute and healing!

Spectator B: I like how she gives off the vibe of an affectionate and devoted wife!

MC: Oooh! She got such a high score, even surpassing Leila-san's score!

Looks like Kurumi-san's classic response is getting good reviews!

Azami: Nice, it seems like... we're receiving high opinions for now.

Citron: We don't have to worry about Itaru's performance too~.

Izumi: Yup, I'm glad that we could get a high score. But…

(Is it just me or is Muku-kun not being his usual self today…)

MC: Alright, the next situation you're going to act out is…

"A way to dodge mother-in-law's cutting remarks well"!!

The one who's going to be your partner for this round is by no means this person!

Azuma: Fufu, pleasure to working with you.

MC: I'm looking forward to see his performance as mother-in-law~.

Now, please welcome our first bride for this round!

*applause*

MC: That was amazing! Coming from the Kingdom of Zahra, Leila-san managed to receive such a high score with her impressive manner!

She's currently taking the top spot!

Spectator A: It was so beautiful and cool!

Spectator B: Totally! I don't know whether I was unconsciously enchanted by them, or I just couldn't take my eyes off them!

Azami: They took a strong interest in Azuma-san's performance…

Izumi: I expected no less from him…

MC: Our next bride will be Kurumi Sakisaka-san!

Azuma: Good luck, Muku.

Muku: Y-Yes…!

MC: Well then, start!

Azuma: "Oh my… do you have a moment, Kurumi-san?"

Muku: "Y-Yes, mother."

Azuma: "Isn't the flavor of this miso soup… too strong? You cut the ingredients way too big, and they look messy now."

Muku: "I-I apologize…! I'll be careful next time…"

Azuma: "And just letting you know, I feel like you're doing a sloppy job in cleaning the corridor."

"There's still dust remaining in the corner. Can you even clean a room?"

Muku: "My apologies… I'll clean more carefully and thoroughly next time."

"I'm… really hopeless when it comes to cleaning and cooking, huh. I truly am just a worthless cloud of dust…"

MC: Hmmm, even though our bride showed realism in how she felt small under her mother-in-law…

Unfortunately, it did not leave a nice impression to the spectators and therefore she didn't receive a good score.

Muku: --.

Azami: Muku-san doesn't look too good.

Izumi: Yeah… I wonder if he's all right…

(Leila-san scored much higher in this round. We'll lose if we can't turn the tables in the next round…)

Citron: …

Azami: Putting that aside… It's getting darker here all of sudden.

Izumi: Yeah… I have a bad feeling about this.

*rain pours down*

Azami: Whoa, it's raining.

Citron: Come here, Director, Azami. You'll get wet.

MC: Our apologies! Due to the heavy rain, we're going to halt the contest!

To all the participants, please exit the stage and go inside the building!

Izumi: I'm worried about Muku-kun. Let's go meet the others at the dressing room.

Azami: Yeah.

Itaru: Seems like it's just a temporary evening rain. We're gonna continue once it stops raining.

Juza: Okay.

Muku: ...Sorry!

I didn't do well in the last round... so we couldn't get a high score….

Itaru: Well, it's fine. There's no way one would not be nervous in a contest.

Azami: Not to mention Azuma-san's performance as mother-in-law was too realistic.

Citron: It was truly amazing!

Azuma: Fufu, I'm so happy to hear that.

Izumi: But… I do think you don't look too good today, Muku-kun. Did something happen?

Muku: The truth is… I exchanged some words with Leila-san before going on stage.

Leila: ...I once went to the Zahra palace during childhood. The palace is just so big I ended up getting lost.

At that time, the one who found me, pulled my hand and played with me was… Citronia-sama.

After playing in the palace together, he made a beautiful bouquet of Jasmine and gave it to me.

I had a lot of fun being with him due to his kindness, and I was so happy when he gave me that bouquet.

I just couldn't forget about Citronia-sama even after several years have passed, so I decided to personally come forward as his fiancee candidate.

Muku: So that's what happened…

Leila: In order to become his bride, I've been attending marriage preparation class, but I never had the chance to meet him afterward…

Then, Citronia-sama went to Japan.

Even though he's now in a faraway country and is no longer in line for the throne, my feelings for him haven't changed.

I love Citronia-sama.

...And that is why I'm not going to let you win this battle.

Let's fight fair and square. See you.

Muku: …

Citron: --.

Muku: ...It was a very beautiful story.

I was like, "I couldn't believe the story that usually happens in shoujo mangas and drama series happened in real life too…"

But when I thought such a thing, I started to feel conflicted whether or not I was doing the right thing…

Izumi: I see… so that's why you couldn't concentrate on your acting.

Muku: However… If I end up losing in the next round, Citron-sama may be returning to his country.

I absolutely can't let that happen.

Besides, it's rude of me to fight Leila-san half-heartedly like this.

For that very reason… I will not make the same mistake again. I will perform my part perfectly for sure!

Citron: Muku…

Muku: I'm sorry. I was the one who accepted the challenge, but I ended up feeling lost.

Citron: ...Don't sweat it.

In the first place, it was my fault that you all got involved in my problem.

But you all helped me… I'm very happy to know that Muku and you guys were willing to cooperate.

Muku is a really good kid, huh, you even considered your opponent's feelings.

Muku: Citron-sama…

Citron: Besides, I remember something thanks to Muku!

Muku: Eh? What is it--.

*knocks*

Staff: Excuse my intrusion. We're going to resume the contest since the rain has stopped. Please get ready.

Azuma: The rain really did stop fast.

Juza: Muku, can you go?

Muku: Yes!

Itaru: I think you should also stand by on the stage with us, Citron. Your turn is about to come, after all.

Citron: Okey dokey!

...I'm counting on you, Muku.

Muku: ...Leave it to me!

MC: Now, since the rain has stopped, we shall resume the competition!

This advance of evening surely provides the right atmosphere for the climax…!

I shall announce the last theme…

It's "Nursing your sick husband"! He's the one who will play the husband!

Juza: I'll be in your care.

MC: Without further ado, let's begin the first performance!

*applause*

Spectator A: That was good~. It was like you were nursed by your kind wife.

Spectator B: IKR!

MC: I expected no less from Leila-san! With her consistent delivery, she received another high score!

Azami: Her score is really high. Do we have to surpass it...

Izumi: Yes. I'm sure Muku-kun can do it…!

MC: Last but not least, the one who will grace this competition is… Kurumi Sakisaka-san! The time is yours!

Muku: "Are you okay? Your fever has gone down a lot, but…"

Juza: "Yeah. Sorry for causing you troubles."

Muku: "Don't say that. ...Here, I made some rice porridge for you. Can you eat?"

Juza: "Thanks."

Muku: "This is a special porridge, you know. I put in eggs, natto, small fish, yogurt, cheese, aojiru*, chilli peppers, pork, citrus and apple. It's very nutritious!"

Juza: "What!?"

Muku: "Now, eat it…! You will be reborn as Super Great Man if you eat this porridge…!"

"Juuust kidding. Fufufu, I'm just joking! But it's truly nutritious."

Juza: "Jeez… It was funny, though."

Muku: "It's still hot so be careful, okay? Fu… fu… alright, aaahn. open your mouth."

Juza: "T-Thank you, but I can eat it myself."

Muku: "No need to hold back. You can act spoiled at times like this."

"Besides, you always work hard… I want to be of help to you."

Spectator A: I feel warm inside…! Her mischievous side is also cute!!

Izumi: (That was a very Muku-kun-like performance. Even the audience's response was great. I'm sure we can win at this rate…)

*applause*

MC: Now that all contestants have delivered their performances, let's see the accumulated score!

Receiving the highest score among the contestants, the winner of this contest is…

Kurumi Sakisaka! Congratulations!!

*cheers*

Izumi: Thank goodness… Congrats, Muku-kun!

Azami: Nice! As expected of Muku-san.

Muku: --.

...Thank you so much!

MC: Now... let's welcome MANKAI Company's Citron-san, who will escort our winner Kurumi Sakisaka-san.

Muku: …

Citron: ...Please come this way, Muku.

Muku: ...Yes. Thank you, Citron-sama.

Citron: Me too. Thank you.

I shall escort you perfectly, princess.

T/N: 1. Aojiru is a Japanese vegetable drink most commonly made from kale or young barley grass.

MC: We are now preparing for the ending ceremony! To those who are expected to appear--.

Leila: …

Citron: ...I want you to wait.

Leila: ...Why?

I have fought fair and square and lost. I will not approach you anymore.

I will also give you the reward money.

Citron: << No… I don't need the reward. I just wanted to talk with you. >>

Leila: << Eh--. >>

Citron: << You're that little boy from before, right? >>

Leila: << ...So you remember? >>

Citron: << Yes. I couldn't tell at first since your appearance has changed so much. >>

<< I've never thought we will meet again in this way. But I'm glad. >>

Leila: << ...If you said so, maybe coming here was worth it. >>

Citron: << From the start, you never intended to bring me back to Zahra, right? >>

Leila: << ...I just wanted to bother Citronia-sama for a bit. >>

<< In order to be your fiance candidate alone, I crossed the gender boundaries and attended marriage preparation class--. >>

<< The person in question will absolutely not meet me, after all. >>

Citron: << That… I'm sorry. >>

Leila: << But I could see the results of that through this match... >>

<< Thank you for going along with my futile effort. I've made up my mind now. >>

<< And please pass on my apology to that girl… I mean, boy. I think I might tease him a little bit too much. >>

Citron: << Huh? So you noticed it? >>

Muku: --Ah, Citron-sama! It's about time.. ah.

Leila: Oh my--.

Muku: Eh, uh… My, my apologies! I'm actually a boy…!

Uhh… I'm sorry for seemingly tricking you!

Leila: …No matter what your reason and circumstance were, I still lost to you. I don't intend on saying anything now.

And thank you for fighting me fair and square.

Muku: Leila-san…

Citron: ...Me and my precious friends are going to perform a play after this. If possible, I want you to watch it.

Muku: That's right! Please watch it!

...Oh, Citron-sama! It's about to begin!

Citron: Oh, you're right! Let's go, Muku!

Muku: My real name is Muku Sakisaka!

I'll do my best for the performance! We'll be waiting for you!

Leila: …

Itaru: Ah, they're here.

Citron: Sorry for making you wait.

Izumi: Are you ready, guys?

Juza: Yeah.

Azuma: Me too.

Azami: Alright, let's go.

Muku: Umm!

I'm sorry for bringing this up just before showtime, but there's something I want to do…

Izumi: ?

Azami: "This is my first time coming to a wedding fair, but I'm glad I could experience many things."

Juza: "Agree. We could wear this kind of tuxedo and get to know things like the ceremony, the direction and the food."

Azuma: "We're able to picture our own ceremony."

Muku: "Yup, it feels like our horizons has widened."

Itaru: "Say, what kind of wedding do you want to have, guys? Like, the direction you want to go."

Citron: "I want to know too. I want to gather references."

Azuma: "Since I'm a cook, I want to treat the guests to my own cooking at the reception."

"My girlfriend also likes cooking, you see. I think it'd be nice if we can cook together and share the first bite."

Juza: "Damn, that sounds awesome."

Muku: "It's really beautiful! I'm sure the ceremony will be exciting and lively!"

Azami: "I'm doing martial arts, so I think it'll be nice if me and my friends perform a martial arts demonstration during the wedding."

Itaru: "Why don't you create a story in which you save the bride, then?"

Citron: "I'm all for that! When the bad guys appear like this, you will protect the bride behind your back…"

Azami: "Haa! Take this!"

Azuma: "So cool…! I'm sure the bride will fall in love with you more."

Azami: "How about you? What kind of wedding do you want to have?"

Juza: "My hobby is drawing. That's why, I want to go all out and make the welcome board myself."

Muku: "That sounds great. The board that was displayed today was adorable too. I like it."

Citron: "Besides, it can be a good memento. It sure makes you want to cherish it forever."

Azuma: "How about you? Do you have any image of your wedding in mind?"

Itaru: "After giving it much thought, I do want to ride limousine at my wedding."

Muku: "Limousine!"

Itaru: "I also think it'll be nice to have a wedding overseas. Reserving an amusement park or planetarium sounds great too."

Azami: "Wow, that seems gorgeous…"

Juza: "But it will be an unforgettable wedding for sure."

Azuma: "It feels kind of romantic to have your wedding at unusual places. I think the guests will have a great time too."

Citron: "As for me, I want to perform a rendition at my wedding, since I like singing and dancing. Just like this."

"♪~♪~"

"Then I will extend my hand in front of the bride and say this: May I have this dance?"

Itaru: "That's not fair. It's too cool."

Muku: "I feel like even those who watch it will have butterflies in their stomachs…!"

Azami: "That'll be like a scene in a movie."

Juza: "How about you, then? What kind of wedding ceremony do you want to hold?"

Muku: "As for me…"

"I want to present the bride a flower bouquet."

Itaru: "A flower bouquet?"

Muku: "Yes. The truth is, my girlfriend is my childhood friend. She has loved flowers ever since she was a child."

"She's always pleased with the wild flowers bouquet I made…"

Azami: "Ooh.. what's with that heartthrobing episode?"

Muku: "Hehe. There was also a time when we couldn't meet ever since I moved to another city."

"Even though we were apart, my girlfriend has always been supporting me."

"My girlfriend is also a hardworking person, you see. That part of her is so charming and cool."

"I want to give her a fragrant, white flowers bouquet that will suit her dignified appearance in the wedding dress."

Azuma: "How lovely…!"

Juza: "I agree. I'm sure your girlfriend will be happy."

*applause*

Izumi: Good job, guys!

Azami: Nice work. We did well in the changed part.

Azuma: Yup. I'm glad the audience was enjoying it too.

Itaru: Thanks so much for today, guys. Let's change our clothes now…

Leila: …

Juza: --.

Muku: Ah…

Izumi: Leila-san…

Muku: Did you watch it?

Leila: Yes. ...It was so beautiful. Both Citronia-sama and the others.

Especially you, Muku-san… I was drawn in your acting. I was deeply moved.

I HAVE BECOME... YOUR FAN!

Izumi: Eh!?

Leila: Muku-san, would you like to come to Zahra with me? Don't worry, I'll provide for you.

Muku: E-Eh…!?

Juza: ...Sorry, but we can't allow that.

Izumi: Leila-san, calm down!

Itaru: I can't believe she just switched from Citron to Muku.

Azami: Is this really happening?

Azuma: Fufu, that was surprising.

Citron: Oh! What kind of development is this!?

< Chapter 1-5 | Masterlist | Epilogue >

#a3!#a3! translation #spring troupe #summer troupe #autumn troupe #winter troupe #muku sakisaka #itaru chigasaki #citron #juza hyodo #azami izumida #azuma yukishiro

21 notes · View notes

monsterdoodles · 4 years

Text

Thoughts on Steven Universe Future 3-13-2020

Together Forever: This episode was a lot less about Steven and Connie, and more about just Steven than expected.

Connie has some plans for college, but we don’t quite get to know what her career goals are exactly. She’s planning on getting into politics, but I’m not sure at what level or what branch. Not that that matters to the episode too much or anything. The University of Jayhawk is all the across the country from Delmarva. This is a distance that Steven cannot emotionally handle right now. Upon this realization, he sinks down into his bed, part of his “floating” powers.

It is good to see that he and Connie keep in touch at least over video calls. On a slightly more concerning note, Steven has memorized Connie’s schedule down to the minute.

Garnet says at the end of the episode, that there was no future in which Steven wouldn’t propose to Connie. I’m guessing had he talked to Garnet instead, he would have proposed to her out of spite or in an effort to prove Garnet wrong.

Instead of Garnet, we do get Ruby and Sapphire this episode. Steven doesn’t seem too surprised by their appearance in this episode, so I imagine that they have been teaching these classes for a while. Ruby is doing some kind of nature scout class, did she make those badges herself, or are they part of a nationally recognized scout organization? Either way she’s teaching some gems and Onion about the beauty of nature. Steven tells her about how Connie seems to really have her life together and knows what she is doing.

I can see a parallel here with Ruby and Sapphire, and Steven and Connie. In this particular case, Steven is Ruby. He doesn’t have the foresight that Connie does right now. He, in a way, lacks future vision.

Ruby, either lacking the knowledge of what might be socially acceptable or being too excited about prospect of Steven expressing his love, tells Steven that he should propose to her. Ruby’s logic here is that it worked for her. She ignores the fact that she and Sapphire had been together for over 5000 years and that they are adults.

Steven visits Sapphire as well, she is teaching a class on alternate timelines. I wonder what that entails exactly. I suppose that they do all of those equations that she explained to Steven, but with the understanding that the future still isn’t as predictable as one might think. She also encourages Steven to propose to Connie despite the fact that she is aware of the sociological implications of this, but she’s a hopeless romantic about it anyways.

Steven declare to the gems, that this will be his last day as Steven Cutie-Pie Demayo Diamond Quartz Universe. Interesting that that interaction with Garnet from almost 4 years ago left that impression on him. That is the same day that he learned about future vision, so I suppose that just stuck in his mind. Also, was he planning to take Connie’s last name or add Maheswaran to his plethora of middle names (that he thinks belongs on official documents for some reason).

He makes his plan. He gets jam, glow sticks and cake. On top of the world, he dresses his best and asks her out from outside her window. He says they’ll be back in 15 minutes (this reminds of an episode of How I Met Your Mother, but the season and name escape me).

At the beach, in the same place they first met, Steven has a picnic set up. Had this just be a romantic gesture or a proposal to date, not marriage, things probably would have gone a lot better for him. Connie responds well to all this. She has been shown to have romantic feelings for Steven in the past, she attempted to kiss him in An Indirect Kiss and she successfully kissed him on the cheek in the movie. Steven sings his song with the sentiment of “I want to be me with you”. The lyrics of which, like many love songs in my opinion, have a codependent quality to them. Steven doesn’t know his future, so he wants someone else to be his future, to be someone else.

Connie, very sensibly, says no. They are young, have never discussed this, and I’m pretty sure they aren’t even an item. She also tells him, “It’s a not now” because there is plenty of time. Steven is in his unending quest for stability, and he still hasn’t found it. Throughout this conversation Connie and Steven occupy opposite spaces on screen. They are in different places in their lives right now, sure and unsure, stable and unstable.

I think if Steven were around more teens his age, he might not be feeling this way, so much at least. He would realize how many people don’t have their lives figured out at this age. Many people his age just want to graduate high school. He really needs to talk to Greg about this. Greg wanted to be a musician, but he was also a community college drop out. He didn’t have everything figured out. (I’m pretty sure this will be part of next week’s episodes in some way)

Connie is willing to stick around when her alarm goes off. Steven tells her to go, probably because he doesn’t want to burden her and because he won’t be holding it together for long. As soon as she leaves, he lies back and creates a crater. The shockwaves ruining the picnic. He lies there until dark.

When he gets up, Garnet is there. She explains to him the inevitability of this situation. She tells him that the hole he is trying to fill won’t be filled by Connie or Stevonnie. Connie is not his “missing piece”. In this scene, Garnet is towering and Steven feels almost as small as his younger self. I think this accentuates how young and foolish Steven was this episode. He holds a frustrated look during this conversation. He says he blames Garnet for making this all look so easy. Reminds me of Cry for Help/Friendship. Pearl had felt the same way about Ruby and Sapphire/Garnet. Steven and Pearl craved that perceived perfection.

Steven then eats his feelings.

Growing Pains: I was wrong in my prediction that Steven would either be stuck in pink mode or have a human ailment.

The episode opens with a scene from the newest instalment of dogcopter. In the movie, Dogcopter proposes to a dog named Drew. Steven laments the fact that “everyone else is getting married”. He continues to eat his feelings like at the ending of last episode, and then his body starts getting out of control. He keeps growing sporadically. He mostly ignores it because it doesn’t hurt him physically.

He wants to reach out to someone who isn’t Connie right now. He can’t reach the gems, so he calls Greg, who is on tour with Sadie and Shep right now. Greg is having a great time, and Steven won’t rain on that parade, even when Greg offers to call him back. He almost wants to call Connie, but she calls him instead. His shapeshifting forces him to answer her call.

He can no longer hide what’s going on with him, since it is manifesting physically. Connie suggests that he should see a doctor. He doesn’t want to bother anyone even when he is physically unwell. He even describes it as a waste of time. Connie persuades him.

Steven pays Doctor Maheswaran a visit, Connie escorts him in. As soon as Connie leaves the room for them to conduct tests, she calls Greg.

This episode really explores how both human and gem Steven really is. He has a human body and it is effected like a human body is. But he is also a gem, it makes his body react unusually and if he’s fractured skeleton is any indication, it is keeping him alive.

Dr. Maheswaran finds out about Steven’s physical traumas through his x-ray. She asks him if he had any particularly traumatic experiences. Steven basically recalls the entire show. Dr. Maheswaran goes on to describe the physical aspects of trauma and the way the body reacts in a way I don’t think I’ve ever seen in any piece of fictional media. Steven’s body is trying to protect him from danger that isn’t there anymore. Minor stress to him is now the equivalent to major stress. To make things worse, he feels as though his support system is gone.

When he thinks back to the proposal, things go haywire. As his body continues to grow in size, he takes up more and more of the room. He is almost too big to fit. There is nowhere left for him to hide. He yells “I can’t be around you right now” much in the way he yelled “I just want to fix it” back in Volleyball. His yell shatters the windows.

Greg finally arrives, revealing that Connie had called him. Connie still very much cares about Steven. He explains to Greg that everything feels like the end of the world to him now.

Receiving understanding and support from Greg is what gets Steven to go back to his normal size. At home he continues to explain his fears and worries. All of which, as Greg explains, are normal. Steven now knows what his problem is, or at least one aspect of it, but I don’t think his problems are solved just yet. From the way he “swells up” in response to stress in this episode, I think something big is about to happen in the show. Something so big, that for his body to protect him from it, he will grow into the giant monster from the opening theme song.

Predictions for next week:

Discussion of leaks ahead

Mr. Universe: Still no episode description for this one, but I imagine this is where Steven crashes the van. Steven is still not in a great place right now, and while he seems more willing to talk about things, his body is still reacting in a way that is unsafe for him and others. I believe that this will lead to the van crashing. As others have pointed out, this episode may involve Pearl because she played a big part in the episode Mr. Greg. I still somehow think this episode will be the story of how Rose decided to have Steven, if not it will be about how Greg made the decision to drop out of college and take on the rockstar persona Mr. Universe.

Fragments: This is where that first leak came from, the “leave me alone I need space one”. I’m still not 100% sure what “fragments” is in reference to. Others I have discussed with have suggested memories. I am not entirely sure the direction of this.

#steven universe #steven universe future #su spoilers #suf spoilers #su leaks #suf leaks #long post #j posts about stuff #c #corrupted steven theory #Did tumblr like just eat this post or something #what's going on???

52 notes · View notes

theofm · 4 years

Text

𝐰𝐨𝐰 𝐢'𝐦 𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐲 beyond excited for this ! to say i’m rusty is a total understatement , but we here to survive ( not thrive ) in this house while i get reacquainted .. my theme is also a work in progress because tumblr decided to ATTACK me with an invalid html error , but we’re pushing through . anyway , all that aside ? i go by leesh & i’m living it up in the pacific tz ( pst ) . my pronouns are she / her & if you want to find me on discord i’m at 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘴 🥳#9405 .

* 𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐠𝐨𝐬 here and do i have the tea for you . theo is back in bridgehampton for the summer , living off the richards’ family $758 million net worth . must be nice to come back home to the hamptons , i wonder what his fellow class of 2017 grads think of his return . you know , he was known around town as the conciliatory and for bhs senior superlatives he was crowned as most likely to become a motivational speaker . i wonder if that still holds true today , a lot can change when you go off to the university of california — los angeles and study political science & international relations . either way , i bet he is still very venturesome , debonair , heedless and boisterous . hopefully this time next year the plans to get a master’s degree & get accepted into the pathways internship program come true . in the meantime , i look forward to seeing him blast 3005 - childish gambino at every hamptons function . it’s going to be a wild summer home , welcome back . ( jacob elordi ) .

. * › statistics .

𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 : theodore richards 𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 : theo 𝐚𝐠𝐞 + 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡 : august 29th , 1999 . 𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧 : virgo 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 + 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐬 : cis male + he / him 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡 : new york , new york 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 : bridgehampton , new york 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 : heterosexual 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 : heteroromantic 𝐨𝐜𝐜𝐮𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 : student 𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 : american 𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 : caucasian 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧 : english

. * › background .

— born to jacob & marissa richards , the former a composer & the latter to become a u.s. ambassador , theo was the product of a love story for the ages . originally marissa cardiff , his mother was born into a wealthy and politically tied family . the high-status claim that theo is so accustomed to originated here , privileged having been an understatement . so when she'd fallen in love with an aspiring musician & composer , her family was far from happy . her & jacob hardly cared , believing that they could live a happy life without the wealth and support of the cardiff name .

— insert theo , the pride & joy of their marriage & for a while .. the glue keeping them together . co-parenting was the first of many faults for the older richards , disagreeing on matters constantly & beginning to struggle financially without the support of marissa's parents . for the lifestyle his mother wanted him to have , primed & proper with the best brands to his name , she realized she hadn't set him up for success in this way . the household began to erupt in constant fighting , a battle that a toddler was painstakingly unaware of . jacob's anger issues were becoming more & more prominent , continuing on until marissa eventually deemed her current situation no longer ideal for herself nor for theo . she'd gathered their belongings in the middle of the night & vanished without a trace , knowing that the cardiff name & the power attached to it would be enough to protect them both from any repercussions .

— of course , theo's grandparents welcomed them into their home with open arms . they were simply thankful that their daughter was finished chasing what they saw to be a wild fantasy , a romeo & juliet plot destined for failure from the beginning . from then on , they both lived at the cardiff estate . theo , shoved into a private school uniform & sent to become exposed to a world of money & power , his mother rising in the ranks to eventually earn her spot as a successful u.s. ambassador for the country .

— theo was primed and polished to follow in his mother’s footsteps in politics , the expectations in his life having been clear from a very young age . follow the sought-after path of the his family , or suffer the consequences . his grandparents , though loving , pushed obligations onto their grandson to make a name for himself . they ensured that his father was kept out of his life , battling & paying him off until he had eventually stopped trying to reconnect with his son . they told him not to make the same mistake as his mother , bolstered him on a path to becoming notorious in the field of politics . this came with immense pressures , especially with his own mother's absence due to work ( among other things ) & wholly believing that there was no other path that he was fitted to pursue .

— however , it wasn’t as if his path of politics was unwilling in any way , his participation in various policy projects throughout high school & extra-circulars such as model un had piqued theo's interests in a different area –– politics . as with most things , he’s motivated by doing what he can to please & earn the affection of the people around him . with that being said , working in politics would allow him to accomplish that goal . as incentivized as he is by the notion of making a direct difference on the people around him & his country , with such a line of work comes great pressure .

— while theo was completing school & living with his grandparents , his mother was either away for work or entertaining the likes of what theo had come to know as many different men . following her failed marriage , she became a serial dater of only the most elite & wealthiest that bridgehampton had to offer . eventually , she settled down once again .. but only after theo had grown up for practically his whole life disapproving of the men she was with . his step-father & step-sister joined their family in theo's early high school years , & the four of them packed up & moved from the cardiff estate to a mansion of their own .

— moving across the country to attend school at ucla absolutely changed his life . being exposed to a whole new sea of people did wonders for the boy’s social life , & being away from the pressures of his family made theo feel like he could finally breathe for once . he’s coming back to bridgehampton with loads of new memories & stories to share . still , something about high school resonates with him — he holds the connections he made there closer to his heart , & there was no denying his excitement when it came time to return home . he still holds out hope that maybe one day he’ll be reunited with his dad , but he seemed to have vanished off the planet .

. * › personality .

— the need to fight for attention & acknowledgement from his own family remained strong . from this , a desire to be liked above all quickly emerged . displaying an agreeable personality has always been theo's way of life — partially because the extrovert within him prefers it , but also because of the male's constant seeking of approval from those around him . theo struggles to always be the guy that everyone expects him to be & never stumble or make a public mistake .

— high school was certainly a whirlwind for theo . he was one of those individuals that knew practically EVERYONE , & he exerted effort to make himself particularly likeable to all . he was rarely home , either hitting after-school spots with friends or attending parties whenever they were thrown . he was also involved in various clubs , teams & associations , taking any opportunity to meet people . undoubtedly , he managed to receive quite a bit of romantic attention in high school too , & i would have expected him to date during those years .

— paired with his sociability is a certain level of carelessness that tends to get him in trouble . when he's out of the watchful eye of those around him , he is more than likely to conjure up a few schemes despite the risk . he'll jump at any opportunity to follow someone into complete darkness , i really don't know how i produced such an idiot . but , to touch on another side to him –– the hopeless romantic energy is strong in this one . he falls hard & fast , is loyal to a fault & is absolutely a relationship type of guy — even if he’s had his fair share of hookups in high school & at ucla . always being surrounded by people has caused theo to develop a fear of being alone , the root cause behind his attachments to others regardless of the relationship .

— it’s not always easy maintaining his composure . there are many days where theo naturally exudes his personality , genuinely enjoying the company of others & wanting to earn approval from the people he cares about . other times , it proves to be more difficult .. particularly when it comes to controlling his anger & other impulses that can arise when he’s rubbed the wrong way . though his mother & grandparents influence most aspects of his life , his temper is one thing that he inherited from his father . sometimes the thought of bringing dishonour to his family or the repercussions he could face as a result of his actions are enough to settle his irrationality , but every once in a while he loses control . i wouldn't put it past him to have gotten in physical fights or developed some enemies along the way , & his temper could easily lead him to end up in a sticky situation .

— when theo is alone & quiet strikes him , he has a tendency to become buried in the worries & pressures that could very well consume him at any moment . the less he’s by himself , the less he has to think about the future or his fears .. like the possibility of ending up alone . he’ll take any opportunity to be surrounded by people , receiving the social interaction he craves & keeping his mind off of the more negative aspects in his life . if that isn’t an option , theo will turn to spotify or his guitar instead — he’s always played & has found music to help him drown out what he otherwise considers to be the deafening silence that welcomes his deepest & darkest thoughts . once he’s had a night out with those closest to him or he takes time to indulge in his music , he finds it much easier to keep up the demeanour that is always expected of him .

— despite his distaste towards his mother's marriage , the male is rather protective over his step-sister & others that he considers himself closest to . fierce loyalty & protectiveness mixed with his anger are sometimes a recipe for disaster , so i’d watch out for that one .

. * › headcanons .

— aesthetics : blasting music while driving around the city at 3am , setting 5+ alarms and ignoring them all , leather jackets , sneaking out , empty beer bottles , profanity , ray bans , parties , holes in walls , restless nights , takeaway coffee cups .

. * › connections .

if you managed to make it through my rambling mess , i have to thank you . now we get onto the good stuff , huh ? i'm just going to list some of my most wanted connections , but i also love plotting based off chem so you can fully expect me to want to learn everything about your muse in order to do so . without further ado .. here we go !

ex(es) : like i said , theo falls hard & fast & definitely exudes simp energy sometimes . i could see him having dated quite a bit , & i’d be open to ex connections that ended on good terms .. bad terms .. anything at all .

fwb(s) : could be past or present , i mean ? a man has needs DSKJSDNJKSD your muse or him could’ve caught feels which caused them to end it , it could’ve been because he attends school all the way in cali , maybe it’s a new thing now that he’s back in bridgehampton . just gimme ..

bro(s) : theo is honestly SUCH a bro . give me his best guy friends from guy school who he always hung out with .. give me them treating each other’s houses like their own , all the late night shenanigans but the occasional emo talk when things get deep . the more bros the merrier , maybe even a guy squad ?

idk i’m so bad at these , just give me chem based things thanks !

#. * 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐃 › out of character .#took me long enough and half of u are asleep but #here we are #entitled:intro

20 notes · View notes

manxita · 4 years

Text

Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince

Since I keep on seeing a lot of people who don’t fully grasp the lyrical genius of this song, I’m going to do a full analysis in what is to me the most complex song on Lover. To me this song has like 3 levels of interpretation: it could be taken at face value as a highschool story, a metaphor for the American Presidential Election, and also a metaphor for hew own life during 2016/17. Each part has multiple possible meanings so this is going to be long, but bear with me please!

You know I adore you I'm crazier for you Than I was at sixteen Lost in a film scene

-This could be an easter egg referring to the song Crazier from the Hannah Montana movie -Sixteen could be her age (if we think of it as happening in a high school), or the year 2016, which happens to be the year of the latest American President elections. -2016 is also the year of the whole Kim & Kanye situation so she could be talking about that too (lost in a film scene referring to Kim’s video of the phone call) -She could be talking to Joe, telling him she loves him more than she did in 2016 and the film scene could refer to his movie (the one she went to see with her friends)

Waving homecoming queens Marching band playing I'm lost in the lights

-This imagery could refer to an actual highschool, but also that she is “lost in the lights”, she is blinded to the problems of her country, she still sees the American Glory which is reflected on the homecoming queens and marching bands. -She could also be “lost in the lights” of fame, like blinded by the whole “hollywood” life.

American glory Faded before me Now I'm feeling hopeless Ripped up my prom dress Running through rose thorns I saw the scoreboard And ran for my life

-This most likely refers to the results of the presidential election. What she saw as American Glory is no longer there, she has no hope after seeing the results, she wants to run away. -But this could also be alluding to the whole Kanye debacle. She was “America’s Sweetheart” and after 2016 she “rip up her prom dress”, she’s no longer loved by everyone. She saw the score board (that K&K won and she lost) and run away.

No cameras catch my pageant smile I counted days, I counted miles To see you there To see you there

-No cameras catch her pageant smile because she decided to hide herself from the world. The rest is to Joe, she counts days and miles to see him because he lives in London and they are not together all the time.

It's been a long time coming but It's you and me That's my whole world -She finally found her safe place with Joe

They whisper in the hallway, "she's a bad, bad girl" (okay!) -This could refer to her reputation back then, people calling her a snake, that she was fake and manipulative. -But it could also allude to Trump calling Hillary Clinton a “nasty woman” during the election campaign,

The whole school is rolling fake dice -Fake dice are actually “charged” to land a certain way, so this could be her implying that people were lied to and because of that they voted how they did, also refer to the whole voter suppression situation. -This could also mean that people are having the wrong information about her and so they land on her being “fake”

You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes

-Quite self explanatory, but I feel that she might be saying that to herself, because she got into this whole mess by trying to be nice to Kanye when she shouldn’t have been (play stupid games) and because of that she ended up being universally hated (stupid prices). -Could also be about the election and how nobody thought Trump could win, and he was given so much press (stupid games) that he ended up winning (stupid prizes).

It's you and me There's nothing like this Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince (okay!) -Most likely Miss Americana is Taylor and the Heartbreak Prince is Joe, we know from other songs that he had a certain reputation for being a ladies man. -Could also refer to Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump

We're so sad, we paint the town blue

-Blue represents sadness but it is also the color of the Democratic Party, so we could take this line at face value or interpret it as political.

Voted most likely to run away With you

-This keeps with the highschool theme (“voted most likely to” is typical of yearbooks), and she actually pretty much run away with Joe to London after 2016, which could be because of the election results or because of all the K&K drama (or probably both).

My team is losing Battered and bruising I see the high fives Between the bad guys Leave with my head hung You are the only one Who seems to care

-By team she could be referring to the Democrats who lost the election, the bad guys being the republicans and Joe being the only one who seems to care. -But the team who is losing could also be us swifties, who were defending her non stop back then, bad guys being K&K and all her haters, and she leaves with her head hung, and WE the swifties are the only ones who seem to care.

American stories Burning before me I'm feeling helpless The damsels are depressed Boys will be boys, then Where are the wise men? Darling, I'm scared

-This verse refers to the #MeToo movement and the president engaging in “locker room talk” (grab them by the p*ssy), but also to her own sexual assault case. “Boys will be boys” is the typical excuse used when men say/do inappropriate things to women.

No cameras catch my muffled cries

-Like before, cameras don’t catch her because she hid herself from the world, But in this particular line it could also be because cameras are not allowed inside the courtroom.

I counted days, I counted miles To see you there To see you there And now the storm is coming, but

-The storm that’s coming could be about politics and the state of the country, or about her personal life when the trial became public. And I don't want you to (Go), I don't really wanna (Fight) 'Cause nobody's gonna (Win), I think you should come home And I don't want you to (Go), I don't really wanna (Fight) 'Cause nobody's gonna (Win), I think you should come home And I don't want you to (Go), I don't really wanna (Fight) 'Cause nobody's gonna (Win), just thought you should know And I'll never let you (Go) 'cause I know this is a (Fight) That someday we're gonna (Win)

-Here she takes the highschool classic Go, Fight, Win and adds it in a very clever way to the song. “I don’t really wanna fight cause nobody’s gonna win” could be about her getting involved in the 2016 elections and choosing to back a candidate: she said in an interview that she thought that speaking back then would have been counterproductive because of her bad reputation. So this line brings 2 of the interpretations of the song together: it being about the elections and about her own life. “I don’t want you to go, I think you should come home” is most likely about Joe, asking him to stay with her. -And at the end she has hope, she’s not letting him go because it’s a fight that she feels they will win someday. The fight being either her being in people’s good graces again, or the Democrats winning in 2020, or fighting against inequality.

Sorry for the length but this is one of my favorite songs on the album and it kills me to see some people dismissing it as just a highschool song when it’s much deeper than that. I hope I didn’t miss anything, if I did please feel free to add to it!

#taylor swift #mine #miss americana #analysis

83 notes · View notes

somegirlsnerdywords2 · 4 years

Text

Anime i’ve Watched

That begin with a H (Part 3)!

Yep this is how i’m going to bring over all the anime and manga i’ve watched and posted about on the old blog. It’s not so detailed but it will have to do. Anything new I watch or read from this point on will have their own posts.

Hetalia Axis Powers:

Genres: ONA, comedy, historical, parody

Synopsis: What if nations were people? What traits would they have? What would this mean for historical events? Hetalia Axis Powers takes these questions and runs with them, personifying countries into characters. The show takes a comedic and light approach to politics and historical events while educating the viewer. Taking place primarily during the events of World War I and World War II, the story focuses on the Axis Powers and occasionally throws the spotlight onto the tumultuous relationship between the Allied Forces. The Axis Powers feature the titular character North Italy, who is clumsy, carefree and loves pasta; Germany, who is very serious but easily flustered; and Japan, who is stoic but has bizarre interests. Based on Hidekaz Himaruya's widely popular webcomic turned print manga, Hetalia Axis Powers is a historical comedy that pokes lightly at culture, examines the relationships between nations and breathes fun into history. [Written By MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 8/10

Finished airing in 2010 with a total of 52, 5 minute long episodes.

My Thoughts: What an odd but fun concept. I originally did episode reviews for this one and unfortunately was unable to ever view the remaining seasons. Can’t really say whether i’d suggest this one or not but it certainly was interesting. Could potentially be something that someone who was really into world history would be into.

Himouto! Umaru-chan:

Genres: comedy, school, seinen, slice of life

Synopsis: People are not always who they appear to be, as is the case with Umaru Doma, the perfect high school girl—that is, until she gets home! Once the front door closes, the real fun begins. When she dons her hamster hoodie, she transforms from a refined, over-achieving student into a lazy, junk food-eating otaku, leaving all the housework to her responsible older brother Taihei. Whether she's hanging out with her friends Nana Ebina and Kirie Motoba, or competing with her self-proclaimed "rival" Sylphinford Tachibana, Umaru knows how to kick back and have some fun! Himouto! Umaru-chan is a cute story that follows the daily adventures of Umaru and Taihei, as they take care of—and put up with—each other the best they can, as well as the unbreakable bonds between friends and siblings. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 9/10

Finished airing in 2015 with a total of 12 episodes.

My thoughts: Now this was a comedy anime that I loved! The character deign was adorable and the comedy was enjoyable. Something light hearted and fun for your viewing pleasure!

Himouto! Umaru-chan R:

Genres: comedy, school, seinen, slice of life

Synopsis: Umaru Doma is a model student who has a hidden side: when she gets home each day, she puts on her hamster hoodie and turns into a sluggish otaku fond of junk food. As Umaru continues these daily antics, the friendship between her and her classmates—Nana Ebina, Kirie Motoba, and Sylphinford Tachibana—deepens, and more and more interesting events begin to unfold.Of course, these events give rise to numerous questions. What did Nana ask of Umaru's brother Taihei? Who is the mysterious girl with the diamond hairpin? And most important of all: why does this girl seem to know Umaru? These questions and more will be answered in Himouto! Umaru-chan R![Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 8/10

Finished airing in 2017 with a total of 12 episodes.

My Thoughts: The comedy continues into the second season! Though to be fair I felt that something about it was just the slightest bit off... like a small bit of its original charm was missing. Still and extremely enjoyable season overall but not as amazing as the first. Or perhaps my taste had simply changed.

Hinamatsuri:

Genres: comedy, sci-fi, seinen, slice of life, supernatural

Synopsis: While reveling in the successful clinching of a prized vase for his collection, Yoshifumi Nitta, a yakuza member, is rudely interrupted when a large, peculiar capsule suddenly materializes and falls on his head. He opens the capsule to reveal a young, blue-haired girl, who doesn't divulge anything about herself but her name—Hina—and the fact that she possesses immense powers. As if things couldn't get any worse, she loses control and unleashes an explosion if her powers remain unused. Faced with no other choice, Nitta finds himself becoming her caregiver. To let her use her powers freely, Nitta asks Hina to help out with a construction deal, which goes smoothly. But while this is happening, a rival yakuza group covertly attacks his boss. To Nitta's shock, his colleagues later pin the blame on him! Tasked with attacking the rival group in retaliation, Nitta steels himself and arrives at their hideout. But suddenly, Hina unexpectedly steps in and helps him wipe out the entire group. As it turns out, Hina might just become a valuable asset to Nitta and his yakuza business, provided she does not use her powers on him first! And so the strange life of this unusual duo begins. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 9/10

Finished airing in 2018 with a total of 12 episodes.

My Thoughts: Any character in a comedy that has a completely deadpan expression and generally colourless tone of voice is sure to be my favourite. This is entirely true of Hinamatsuri, though to be fair I loved the entire cast of characters. The characters, art and comedy are all strong points of this anime. Another light one to enjoy when you may be feeling a bit down!

Hitorijime My Hero:

Genres: drama, romance, school, shounen ai, slice of life

Synopsis: Masahiro Setagawa is a hopeless teenager who is often used by the neighborhood bullies as an errand boy. Defenseless, Masahiro knows that nobody will ever save him. However, his life drastically changes when he meets Kousuke Ooshiba, a man known as the "Bear Killer," who takes down neighborhood gangs. A year later, Masahiro and his former friend, Kensuke Ooshiba, attend high school, only to find that Kousuke is their math teacher. While the three grow closer, Masahiro starts to view Kousuke as his "hero," and Kousuke develops an urging desire to protect Masahiro. However, their normal lives take a turn when Kensuke's childhood friend, Asaya Hasekura, returns, seeing Kensuke as more than just a friend, much to his surprise. Will the three boys be able to live a regular high school life? Or will forbidden love keep them apart forever? [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 7/10

Finished airing in 2017 with a total of 12 episodes.

My Thoughts: Not an amazing shounen ai but certainly one of the better ones that have made it to anime. None of that creepy dubious consent or abuse here. Bit of an age difference but there isn’t any racy, sexy time so it’s all good. A cute and mostly innocent romance. Nothing amazing but fine enough.

Honobono Log:

Genres:

Synopsis: Some of us are fortunate enough to have a partner to confide in on our bad days. In even the most devastating times, we can depend on our comrades for support. Others are incredibly lucky to have a special someone that they can just randomly embrace. No matter the situation, there always tends to be a close ally to help us get by. Honobono Log showcases the best and worst of couples and families, enticing romantic-comedy lovers with various relatable situations.

My Rating: 7/10

Finished airing in 2016 with a total of 10 episodes.

My Thoughts: Bite sized glimpses into the romantic lives of a handful of characters. Cute and occasionally touching. Nice artwork.

#hetalia axis powers #anime #himouto! umaru chan #himouto! Umaru chan R #hinamatsuri #hitorijime my hero #honobono log

7 notes · View notes

cinaja · 4 years

Text

Before the Wall part 9

An acotar fanfic that takes place during the time of the War. For the summary and the entire fic, click here

Disclaimer: The world and the characters in acotar belong to sjm

---

When Rhys opens the door, the first thing he notices is that he isn't alone in his room.

His hand shoots to his dagger, he mentally checks his shields. In the Illyrian camps, a few of his fellow soldiers liked ambushing him and the others and Rhys trusts the High Fae of the Hewn City no more than the Illyrians.

"Who's there?", he calls into the room and pulls the door shut behind him.

"Me", a soft voice replies and Az steps out of the shadows.

Rhys curses. "Shit, Az. You want me to have a heart attack?"

"Your father can't know I'm here. He forbid me from seeking you out."

Rhys frowns. "Is everything alright? Are you..."

"I'm fine", Az says, but there are shadows in his eyes that weren't there when they last saw each other. What is his father forcing him to do? Az continues, "It's you I'm worried about."

"Why?", Rhys asks, a cold knot forming in his stomach.

"Your father. He feels threatened by you - by us. You are almost as powerful as he is, and with us as your friends... He fears you might try taking the throne."

Rhys nods slowly. He should have seen it coming. He pushed his father too far - their argument a week ago was likely the last straw.

"What about you, then? Mor and Cass? Is he after you too?"

Az shakes his head. "I'm too... useful." He practically snarls the word. "He won't harm me. And Mor is safe on the Continent. I don't know why, but that emissary, Miryam, has taken an interest in her and your father won't risk crossing her. Cass might be in danger, though."

Rhys nods, relief and worry warring in him. "What can I do?"

"Keep a low profile", Az says, "You father will likely send you and Cass to battle at the coast. Whatever you do, don't draw any more attention to yourself."

Without another word, he vanishes, leaving Rhys alone in his empty room.

----

Three days after Drakon's council voted in favour of joining the war, their decision remains secret, both to their allies and enemies.

Drakon sits next to Sinna and watches another group of soldiers try out for the army

With the looming war, there are plenty of volunteers who wish to fight and support Erithia's standing army. (An army that, on its own, is rather impressive already. Not the biggest on the Continent, not by far, but well-trained and sizeable enough to be significant in this war.)

"That one's good", Sinna comments and gives an approving nod to a soldier who just completed his trial flight.

Neither Drakon nor Sinna are strictly needed for this, but as Prince and General of Erithia, they are expected to watch at least a part of the proceedings. Besides, they both have a personal connection to one of today's participants.

Steps approach and Drakon turns around to find his emissary standing behind him. The male bows and says, "Ravenia sent another letter demanding we choose a side. And the Alliance wants to send an emissary. They heard you are raising your armies."

Drakon sighs. "Can you delay them again? We only need two more days."

"Not without reason. You know the Queen."

Yes, Drakon does. He thinks of the statues on the mountain where the Seraphim honour their dead, of the family he lost.

"Why does she even want to marry me?", he asks, "Honestly, I don't get it. She doesn't even seem to like me - which I take as a compliment - and I never made a secret of my opinion on slavery."

His emissary just shrugs. "I don't know, Your Grace. But I could...", he hesitates. "If I let it leak that you have trouble controlling your council, it could work, but it would..."

"Make me look like an incompetent fool in front of the entire Continent?", Drakon asks wryly, "Do it, then."

The idea doesn't sit well with him, but at least the impression won't last long. Because in two days, if all goes well, they will take the Callian Pass from Rask. It is one of the only passages across the mountain range that divides the Continent and easily one of the most important strategic locations in this war. Unfortunately, it has belonged to Rast for the past eight centuries.

So they are really going to need the moment of surprise on their side.

Drakon has already written the letter declaring war on the Loyalists and asking the Alliance to be allowed to join as well as a rather personal and insulting note addressed to Ravenia, but they won't be sent until the last moment.

His emissary bows and leaves. Drakon turns back to the try-outs.

"Have I told you already that I love your plan? Taking the Callian Pass from Rask by attacking without warning", Sinna says, "Insane, but sneaky. Hard to believe you came up with it."

"Thank you for the vote of confidence", Drakon mutters.

Truth is, he doesn't really feel good about invading Rask without warning. It's not the honourable thing to do. But, as Sinna told him in her usual brisk style, honour doesn't win wars, especially if your enemy has none.

They watch the next would-be soldiers in silence, until Sinna says, "You know, now that we are officially going to war, we should probably try to cut any unnecessary drains to our resources."

"Such as?" Drakon has a bad feeling about where this is going.

"Such as having our spies look for that slave girl you talked to once. If I didn't know better, I'd say the rumours are true and you have a thing for her."

Drakon glares. "She was a child and completely terrified of me. Do you honestly think..." He cuts himself off and shakes his head. "I just want to thank her. Because, you know, she's the reason I'm not married to Ravenia right now."

He can imagine the girl won't be terribly interested in ever seeing him again. But Drakon needs to know she's alright. After that, he's going to leave and never seek her out again.

"Well, regardless, looking for one half-Fae female without even knowing her name is both hopeless and a waste of resources."

"Fine", Drakon snaps, "I'll lower the priority of her case." He nods towards the try-outs. "How long until it's Nephelle's turn?"

"Two more", Sinna replies, suddenly tense.

Nephelle wants to join the army - wants to fight for her country and for human freedom. Badly.

But the harsh truth is, she would never have even made it through the examination that precedes the try-outs. She is too short, her right wing too small to pass the physical requirements. So Sinna asked Drakon to pull some strings for her lover. (Abuse of power, technically. But Nephelle is his friend and it isn't a big abuse. Still morally wrong. Why does he always end up in these situations?)

"She's going to make it", Sinna says, a stubborn set to her jaw.

Drakon nods, even though he knows Nephelle's chances are slim. It's not that he doesn't believe in her - Nephelle is probably the most strong-willed Seraphim he ever met - but Sinna told him that she never managed to reach the requirements in training. Not once.

She still wants to try, though.

Drakon watches as the a group of competitors exit the ring and claps politely. Nephelle steps into the arena with the next group. She holds her head high, wings drawn tightly to her body.

The beginning of the try out goes fine. Nephelle hits the centre of the target each time, surpassing the requirements by far. But then, the main part of the try out begins. Flying two miles, carrying weapons and a Seraphim shield.

Nephelle is barely able to take off with the shield. Once she is in the air, her smaller right wing can't support the weight and she keeps almost falling out of the air.

It is almost painful to watch. Because Nephelle refuses to give up. Even as her feet almost brush the ground, even as everyone but her has long finished, she refuses to give up.

"Come on", Sinna whispers.

But Nephelle doesn't make it. She doesn't even reach the end of the race. Two rounds before the finish line, her right wing gives in and she falls to the ground. Sinna is on her feet in an instant, rushing for her.

Nephelle just drops her shield and weapons and walks out of the arena, wings lowered and dragging over the ground behind her. Sinna runs after her.

The arena is silent. No one laughs. Not a single person.

Drakon wishes he could run after Nephelle and Sinna as well. But he has to stay at least a moment longer. He is the Prince and can't just leave whenever he feels like it. So he remains to watch one more group. Then, he thanks all participants and excuses himself.

He finds Sinna and Nephelle in a small room behind the arena. As he enters, Nephelle just withdraws her hand from Sinna's.

"All I want is to fight for what I believe in and I don't even get a chance!"

Nephelle is crying, he realises with a start. He doesn't think he ever saw her cry before, not even when some people whispered 'cripple' behind her back. (Not that anyone ever called her that twice, at least not when Drakon or Sinna were around to hear.)

Drakon knocks on the door and the females dart around to him. He smiles at Nephelle.

"If you ask me, you'd be wasted in the army, anyways", he says.

Nephelle doesn't smile back at him. She looks so... hopeless. "Yes, maybe I can wash the soldier's clothes. That's about all I'm good for."

Sinna opens her mouth to object, but Drakon beats her to it, "Come on, now, you don't believe that. You know more about nature and geography than anyone else and I've seen your drawings. You're brilliant."

"So I'll just draw our enemies to death?"

"No”, Drakon says, "I was thinking you'd be exceptionally well-suited to being a cartographer. For that, you need some prior experience because, believe it or not, it's actually harder than wielding a sword, so we've had a hard time finding people for it. Maybe you can help us out."

Nephelle blinks at him. Then, slowly, she begins to smile

"Yes", she says, "I think I'd like that."

"Great", Drakon says, "saves me the headache of finding anyone else to do the job."

It's good to see that sometimes, his plans actually work.

----

Miryam barely manages to talk to Jurian the day after the battle. Well, they talk plenty, but only about the camp organisation.

So after spending the next night trying to figure out the 'Language of the Universe' (which makes Continental politics look easy by comparison) she invites herself along on a patrol she knows Jurian is leading.

They aren't exactly alone, but the nine soldiers wo accompany them are kind enough to keep their distance. Miryam with her Fae heritage can still hear their conversation, but she doubts they understand what her and Jurian are talking about.

"Did you know that Mor started training?", Jurian asks.

Miryam nods and leans forward to pat her horse's neck. "She told me. She thinks that you're an excellent teacher."

"I could teach you, too", Jurian says a bit too casually. She`d bet that he only brought up Mor to suggest training again.

"It's a nice offer, Jur, but I neither want nor need to fight."

Miryam does carry a dagger, but that's just to keep Jurian from worrying. He hates that she doesn't know how to defend herself, but she hates the idea of killing another person. (There are a few people she'd make an exception for, but she doubts that she'll ever be in the position to kill Ravenia or Artax.)

"We're in the middle of a war", Jurian says drily.

"And I'm a healer. And a member of the Alliance's council, an emissary. There are several ways to contribute to the war effort and not all of them involve wielding a sword."

Jurian sighs. "I know that. You think I don't know? And I don't want you to fight in battles, but... learn to defend yourself. Just in case." When Miryam still hesitates, he adds, "Please."

How can she say no to that?

"Alright. But just the basics." At least it means she gets to spend more time with Jurian.

"Great. Let's meet at dawn each day. One hour."

Miryam smiles in spite of herself. "You really did plan that, didn't you?"

"Never go to battle unprepared. I even had two back up plans prepared." Jurian laughs. "You agreed more quickly than I thought."

Miryam smiles. Cauldron, she really missed him. (If she's being honest, it's not the camp that has become home, but rather the man besides her. She wonders if that's what love feels like.)

At that moment, she notices a movement in the bushes next to them. She lightly pulls at her horses' reins to get it to slow down and slides out of the saddle. Something is hanging between two trees, something that's moving, but she can't quite make it out.

"What's that?", Miryam asks.

Jurian frowns. "I can't see anything."

For a second, Miryam thinks that this is her magic playing tricks on her, that she once again sees something that no one else can see. But then, she remembers that she can see much further than Jurian thanks to her mixed heritage and he likely just can't make out the movement she noticed.

Without another word, Miryam rushes off into the bushes. She can hear branches snap behind her as Jurian follows her. After a few steps, she reaches a net, hanging between two trees. Inside, a falcon is caught, its feather a beautiful shade of burnt red.

"It's a trap", Jurian says from behind her, "Likely set up by some peasants."

Miryam nods and draws her dagger. Carefully, she approaches the falcon.

"Easy", she whispers, "I want to help you."

"You'll get your eyes hacked out", Jurian warns.

But the falcon holds perfectly still as Miryam reaches out, although its amber eyes remain fixed on the dagger as she carefully begins to cut through the net trapping it. As more of the strands come loose, the falcon begins to sway. It screeches and tries to flap its wings. Hastily, Miryam holds out an arm for it to hold onto. (Not her best idea. She's sure the falcon doesn't mean to hurt her, but its claws still cut through her sleeve and into her arm.) Miryam grits her teeth and cuts the last bit of rope

"What now?", Jurian asks, "Its wing is broken, it won't be able to fly or survive like this."

Indeed, the falcon's left wing is hanging in an odd angle. Miryam bites her lip. The idea of this bird never being able to fly again is horribly sad. (When Miryam was younger, she dreamed of growing wings and flying far away.)

"I'm taking it back to the camp. Maybe I can heal it."

She shoots the net a mournful look. What if the person who set is up is close to starvation? She finds a gold mark in her pocket and puts it on the ground next to the ruined net.

Jurian shakes his head. "You're incorrigible. Here." He pulls off one of his leather gloves and hands it to Miryam. "Put that on or you won't be able to hold a blade tomorrow for training."

"How thoughtful." Miryam grins at him.

She puts on the glove and lets the falcon climb on her other arm. She can tell the bird is trying to be careful, but it still hurts when it pulls its talons out of her arm and hops on her other hand.

"It must have been trained", Jurian says.

Miryam is sure it isn't. But it's better if Jurian thinks so, so she just nods and turns back towards their horses, the falcon surprisingly heavy on her arm.

----

Rhys didn't think he'd be this nervous. After all these years of training, after everything he survived in the Illyrian mountains, he never thought his first battle would scare him this much.

Cass is nervous, too. Rhys doubts any of the other Illyrians in their group notice, though. Because Cassian is all brave words and laughter. He jokes around and makes light-hearted comments. But Rhys knows Cass well enough to see that the louder he is, the more nervous he feels deep down.

It is not Rhys who leads this assault, but Devlon. And although Rhys knows that this was meant to be a slight by his father, ha thanks the Cauldron for it.

His first battle. He could not imagine being the one leading it.

A whistle sounds, warning them that a group of enemies is approaching.

"Remember to keep your head down", Rhys whispers to Cassian, Azriel's warning ringing in his ears.

Cass presses his lips together in annoyance. Rhys can see he hates the idea of not fighting to his fullest, of risking their companions' lives in doing so. But he nods.

From their waiting place on the mountain side, Rhys can now see the enemy approach, walking through the valley in neat, organised lines. They wait until the soldiers are well below them. Then, a horn blast sound, giving the sign to attack.

Rhys flares his wings and leaps into the air.

His first kill is a High Fae male from Spring, who looks almost surprised as he collapses. (It is not really his first kill, of course. He killed plenty during the Rite. Still, battle feels different. More chaotic. Both more and less horrific at the same time.)

Rhys drops deep into battle calm. Any emotions become distant, irrelevant. But even as he kills his way through battle lines, even as his power is a roaring ocean beneath him, he keeps a tight hold on his magic. Doesn't use it beyond basic shielding.

The first minutes go well. The Illyrians outnumber their opponents and they have the moment of surprise on their side.

But then, the tide starts turning.

The Hybern Fae have magic - more than their spies reported and far more than the Illyrians. One High Fae lifts his hand, grey power flares and a dozen Illyrians turn to dust. Rhys creates shields, uses his magic to protect as many soldiers as he can. But still, he doesn't use it to smash their opponents to dust. Still, he uses nothing but his sword to attack.

Do not draw attention to yourself.

Around him, the corpses add up. Loyalist Fae, but just as many Illyrians.

Cassian makes the decision a second before Rhys does.

His siphons flare, red power blasting a hole into the enemy lines. A second later, Rhys follows. He stretches out a hand and darkness leashes out. Soldiers start screaming.

It is over in the span of minutes.

Over the corpses, Rhys exchanges a look with Cassian. Both of them are wide-eyed and panting.

Rhys spends the following hours helping with the wounded, collecting the dead. He wonders how many of these soldiers might still be alive if he had acted sooner, if he had not tried to avoid his father's wrath. He tries to memorise the faces of the dead. He is sure they will haunt him for the rest of his life.

And silently, he swears to never let his fear of his father stop him from doing what's right again.

----

Miryam names the falcon Kiel, because that's what its cries sound like. (Helion tells her that the name means 'free' in Old Landian and Miryam nods like she knew that already.)

It is the middle of the night. Miryam once again lit her candle and sits perched over the book. Kiel is watching her, his amber eyes glowing in the dark. Miryam feeds the bird a strap of meat she got from the kitchen.

"What do you think?", she asks, "Should I do this?"

"Kieeel", the falkon replies, which could mean anything ranging from 'Why are you asking me, you stupid human' to 'I want more meat'. Miryam feeds him another strap of meat and gets up

"Wish me luck", she says. (At this point, she truly hopes that animals understand her. Otherwise, she is making a complete fool of herself.)

The spell is easy, the book claims. Well, it is still second grade, because the book's former owner deemed first grade spells too simple to write them down. Miryam has memorised the words, the instructions. The book claims that for a spell as simple as this, no one with witch blood would need anything but the words, but Miryam would rather not bet her life on that so she follows the instructions by the letter.

She takes out a bit of chalk and uses it to draw a circle on the ground, symbols lining its edges. Then, she puts up four candles and adds a few bone shards for good measure.

She steps into the circle and lights the candles. Then, she begins speaking.

The words taste strange on her tongue, burn in her throat. All around her, the strings start glowing more brightly. New ones appear, wrapping around her.

And suddenly, Miryam understands why they call it 'Language of the Universe'. Because it is the language of the strings and each word Miryam speaks makes them move, like she is giving them orders. Her power is thrumming through her, light dances through the room and creates a net wrapping around the tent.

It is beautiful.

But Miryam doesn't mean to actually set up a ward around her tent - it would be hard to explain - so she starts reciting the second spell, the one that's supposed to break the wards. Indeed, the net begins to loosen, lines withdrawing with her every word. It is far easier than she thought. Just like that, the wards are gone.

But her power still rises. The fabric of the tent starts flapping on a fathom wind, Kiel shrikes.

Miryam panics. She tries to call her power back, to clamp down her hold on it once again, but it won't obey her. The flames of the candles flicker higher, until they almost reach the tent's ceiling, trapping her in a ring of flames.

"Stop", she whispers, "Please, stop."

It doesn't. Miryam feels like she's standing in the middle of a river, her magic tugging at her like a strong current and she cannot make it stop. She pushes against the magic. It pushes back and for a moment, Miryam thinks that she's going to lose this battle.

But then, her magic gives in.

It rushes away from her in a wave, further and further until Miryam can breathe again. The candles flicker and go out. She lets herself slide to the ground.

Her head hurts, but at least she doesn't feel like her body is on fire. At least it went better than that first time. Miryam is almost relieved.

Until shouts start ringing out all through the camp. She scrambles to her feet, stares at the circle on the ground, undeniable proof of what she did.

She grabs the candles and bones and shoves them into a bag that she flings under her bed. Hands shaking, she puts the book back into its hiding place and wipes away the chalk. Then, she rushes out of her tent.

Soldiers are running around outside. Miryam catches one of them by the arm. "What happened?", she asks

"I don't know, but there was this tremor. Really creepy." He shakes his head. "Magic really is a curse."

A good summary. Miryam lets him go and runs off to the centre of the commotion, which is where she'll likely find Jurian. Indeed, he is standing in the centre of a group of soldiers, trying to calm them. When he sees Miryam, he waves her closer.

"Thank the Cauldron, you're here", he whispers, "Someone shattered our wards, the soldiers are panicking. I need you to help calm them."

Only then does Miryam notice that the strings forming a net over the camp are gone.

Oh Mother. She did this. And the worst part is, it wasn't even hard.

----

A/N: Let me tell you, trying to keep to canon is hard! Like the fact that Drakon is looking for Miryam for three years without ever finding or meeting her (which I'm having a bit of a hard time explaining, but hey, just about a year to go)

Well, anyways, this part was rather slow. Next time: Rhys has trouble with his father (what's new), Mor gets used to life on the Continent and Drakon goes through with his plan

@starswhoanswer

#miryam #jurian #drakon #morrigan #mor #before the wall #the war #fanfic

13 notes · View notes