#i have read edited and re-read this so many times so apologies if it makes no sense. i just want | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

paradox-the-unimpressed-nun · 27 days

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Yoriichi x F!reader Minors DNI 18+

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆ REQUEST ARE OPEN

Summary: You and yoriichi have one main thing in common, you both want a family

Warning: breeding kink, creampie, fluff, vanilla sex, oral sex f!receiving , mentions of a stillborn, spit as lube. Not prof read⚠️

A/N: I just wanted to write a little smut for my dear lil sunshine boy, I'm sorry for the all the smut as of late I've been possessed.(>-•)╦̵̵̿╤─ (⊙⊙). I’ve edited some things from the og so if it’s different from the sneak peak thats why :4.

Yoriichi has never been the best at showing emotions, you’re very aware of this. Many are put off by his lack of expression.

You’ve learned that even though his face doesn’t show any emotion, that doesn’t mean he isn’t feeling anything. In truth he feels a lot, he’s an incredibly sweet and kind man.

The main point of your bounding between you and yoriichi is that you both desperately want a family.

You lost your family just like Yoriichi, of course you talked about other things but the topic of family always snuck it’s face into your conversations.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆

You make your way towards Yoriichi with a tray of of food in your hands. Yoriichi is quietly sitting on your porch, he would have been mistaken for a statue if he didn’t shift his head into your direction.

“Forgive me for taking so long, I thought I had sweat tea but I ended up only having green tea” Yoriichi takes the plate from your hands as you sit down, he returns after your fully seated.

“It is fine, I like green tea” his voice bland a quick as usual. You hand him a cup, you carefully watch him take a sip. You’re worried you somehow managed to mess up the tea.

His face doesn’t change as he finishes his sip. “It’s good” again his voice is bland but you know he actually likes it. There’s a awkward silence between you to, your eyes wander trying to find something to make the mood better.

Your eyes fixate on the tea, picking up your own glass you scoot yourself closer to him. You smile at him “I-I heard that green tea is good for fertility” the smile quickly fades from your face as Yoriichi stares at you.

For once you have no idea what he’s thinking or feeling, he just stares directly into your eyes. Panic washes over you as you believe you’ve greatly upset him. Your face turns a beat red and you stumble out an apology.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it-like that!” You avert your gaze away from him being to embarrassed for the prior statement. Yoriichis gaze slightly softens and he opens his mouth “it’s fine, I know you mean well”.

Your gaze makes it back to his, your heart speaks before your mind. “I….I mean…I just thought..what if you got re married” immediately you mentally slap yourself.

In a conversation you had with yoriichi awhile back you brought up getting re married, you said you were open to the idea of getting re married while yoriichi shut down the thought of re marrying.

You’re already about to spill out another apology but yoriichi cuts you off. “If I got re married then this tea would be quite helpful, I appreciate the thought” he’s voice is different you don’t know how but it is, his voice sounds like a new song to you. Your eyes widen as he entertains the thought of getting re married.

You stare at him, and lean closer to him. Slowly you place your hand on Yoriichis cheek, your heart beat fastens. The world feels almost silent as the only thing your able to hear is the sound of your heart racing. Yoriichi doesn't move neither does his gaze, he carefully watches you.

Now you're inches from his face, you pause and stare into his eyes one last time. Next you connect your lips to his soft and warm ones. Your heart flutters as your lips connect, you feel so loved, beautiful and wanted.

Yoriichi shortly kisses you back wrapping his arms around you in the process. Sliding your arms around his neck you both deepen the kiss. As you both kiss Yoriichi gently moves you onto your back and makes his way on top of you. Yoriichi licks your lower lip asking permission to go inside. You let his tongue in as you wrap your legs around his hips. Both of your tongues dance with each other. You feel as if you're melting into him.

You both were so lost in the kiss neither of you realized your hips were grinding against each other. A bulge formed in Yoriichi pants, he subconsciously grinds his bulge harder into your clothed sex.

Yoriichi pulls away from the kiss -much to your dismay- thoughts race through your mind as you wonder what you did wrong in order to make him stop.

“I don’t want our first time together to be on the floor… Can we move to your room?” As he gets up he grabs your to help you up, he doesn’t let go after. “Yes….I think that would be much more romantic” you respond unsure as what to say.

Hand in hand you walk to your bedroom, you open the door for him and went in. You both sit down on the futon, his lips immediately find themselves back onto yours.

Yoriichi once again pulled away but this time he focused on your neck. He trails kisses upon your neck, gently sucking on your neck. There will defiantly be marks on your neck in the morning.

sneakily his hands find their way to your obi, he slowly unties it. Your obi slips off of you and soon does the rest of your kimono. Leaving you in nothing but your panties. In return you undress him, you’re slow wanting to take in all of his image. It seems you aren’t alone, yoriichi takes this opportunity to also admire your body. Feeling his gaze you instinctively cover your breast and stomach.

He stared at you a little dumbfounded, did he not like you stretch marks? Or was he disgusted with your extra pudge? Thoughts started to run through your mind, Yoriichi seemed to have taken noticed. Yoriichi pulls your hands away from your chest, bringing them to your side. While covering yourself you had left finger marks from squeezing to hard.

He makes his way lower down your body, he places kisses on the marks you left behind. You can hear your heart beat, you believe he can to. His hands sneakily makes it to your breast groping your chest. Taking one of your breast into his mouth and while his hand plays with your harden nipples. His tongue swirls around your buds, the other pinching your nipple.

A loud pop sound comes from him letting go of your chest, he looks up at you and squeezes your breast. “These need to be filled” Yoriichis words go straight to your clit making you somehow wetter than you already were.

Yoriichi lays you onto your back, in the process he grabs your legs. He taps two fingers on your thigh, asking for approval. Turing your head you slowly open your legs, your panties were dampen from your arousal . Shivers run up your spine as he place’s sweet kisses down your inner thigh. He makes sure to be slow, wanting to savor the moment. Finally he makes it to needy cunt. Yoriichi simply moves your panties to the side, he is to hungry to fully take them off. You could feel is hot breath against your clit, you instinctively bump your hips up.

He laps at your cunt, instinctively you close your legs. It’s been so long sense you’ve had someone go down on you, the feeling almost feels foreign. You didn’t even realize what you did until you feel yoriichis hand tap your thigh. Immediately you open your legs back up, your face is red as a tomato. “Sorry!!” You squeak out, turning your head to the side out of embarrassment. “It is fine…” is the only thing he said before closing his lips around your sensitive nub, sucking gently and promoting your eyes to flutter shut.

With one hand you grab his neat ponytail to push his him down further, the other grabbing the futon beneath you. Yoriichi fingers prod at your opening slithering into you. Instinctively you arch your back to get more stimulation. Yoriichi slides in another finger which earns him a sweet moan from your lips. A mixture of your fluids and yoriichis spit drips down his chin. Your once free hand moves to yoriichis ponytail “Yoriichi I’m close!” you moan in-between words. He doesn’t stop. Letting go of the futon you grab his ponytail and force his head down more, arching your back and hips in the process. Yoriichi laps at your clit and his fingers curl inside of you. Your vision goes white as you feel yoriichi lap at your sweet release. Your legs shake as you continue to hold yoriichi in place, panting form your high. It’s been a very long time sense you’ve had an orgasm this amazing. Yoriichi takes the initiative and pops his head up then pushes your hips down.

His gaze meets yours instinctively you turn away your arm covering your blushful face. You’re a little embarrassed that your juices are all over yoriichis mouth and chin. Yoriichi pulls your hips towards his, pulling you out of your thoughts. Somehow you feel hotter. He spits in his hand and rubs his very hard, leaking shaft. See his cock makes your mouth water, it’s just as beautiful as the rest of him. Big with a pretty pink tip, you wished he would’ve given you the time to suck him off, perhaps next time… yoriichi rubs his tip up against your entrance, rubbing it up against your soaking cunt. A grunt comes from him as your warm sticky juices cover his shaft. Anxiety erupts over you, hopefully he won’t find you “to loose”.

With a shaky breath Yoriichi speaks “I’m going to put it in now…” his face his flushed and his briefly look up at yours. All you can do is nod as you eagerly wait for him to finally put it in.

Finally he directs his tip to your entrance, slowly he slides in. Both of you moan at the feeling of one another’s body’s finally connecting. Yoriichi is big but you didn’t expect him to stretch you. He stops waiting for you to adjust to his size, he looks up waiting for your approval.

“Con-continue…please” your speech slow from you trying to calm your breathing. Yoriichi starts with slow thrust, trying to be gentle with you and find your sweet spots. His fingers dig into the meat of your hips, surely it will leave marks in the morning. Yoriichi earns a moan out of you as he brushes a certain spot inside of you.

“Right there! Right there!” You wrap your legs around his hips and hands hold onto his back. Keeping him there not wanting him to lose that spot. Yoriichi thrust more rough hitting that spot that made you see stars again. Heading your sweet moans made him pick up his pace his forehead onto yours.

You earn grunts and wines from yoriichi as you squeeze around him. Your cunt practically sucking him in deeper yearning for more. Each time he hits that spot he yearns a moan of his name from your sweet lips.

Yoriichi kisses your forehead lovingly, each kiss making your heart and cunt flutter. He moves kisses down your nose to your cheek then to your lips. Yoriichi sucks at your bottom lip making your mouth open, he takes this as an opportunity to sneak his tongue back into your mouth. In between kisses both of your moans can be heard. You feel like it’s your first time all over again, completely lost in the others body, sloppily kissing and humping. Yoriichis thrust turns into sloppy grinds wanting to get as deep as possible inside of you. Yoriichi breaks the kiss leaving a trail of saliva running down both of your chins. His eyes make it towards your chest seeing the stretch marks on your breast. Thoughts of you bearing hid children spread through his head, he knew he wanted a family with you but actually being in the moment? Having the opportunity to have the family he always wanted? It made his head spin.

Yoriichi pulls out completely leaving your poor cunt grasping onto nothing, a whine leaves you as the uncomfortable feeling of being empty flushed over you. What happened? What went wrong? Why did he pull out? You were about to ask why but was quickly stopped and yoriichi grabbed under your knee. He pushes your knees to your chest and lines himself back up to your cunt. Yoriichi quickly waste no time and bottoms you out, You scream and the absolute pleasure. He had put you into a mating press, somehow yoriichi feels deeper and bigger. His heavy balls slap against your dripping cunt. Both your juices and his precum slide down your ass onto the once cleaned Funton.

Your nails dig into his back leaving little red marks. You feel a familiar tightness building up in you. Yoriichi seems to be close as well, with that he picks up his pace.

You try desperately to tell him that you’re close but, you can’t seem to be able to forms the words to tell him. Drool drips down you mouth as your completely taken over by pleasure.

Jerking your head back onto the soft pillow that tightness that had been building up finally releases.

Yoriichi fucks you through your sweet organism, somehow going faster before finally stopping hitting his own orgasm. Thick white strings of cum line the walls of your sweet cunt, filling your womb to the brim.

Yoriichis warm cum seeps out of your pussy spilling onto the soiled sheets.

You both stay there for what feels like forever. Enjoying the feeling of one another’s bodies being against each other.

Looking up at yoriichis face he’s completely flushed, sweat drips down his forehead as he looks down at your also flustered self.

Yoriichi he looks at you like he’s just learned how to love all over again.

You don’t want him to stop and it doesn’t seem that he’s planning on stopping anytime soon. As he starts grinding his hips into yours once more.

You pull him down into a kiss, and of course returns the kiss. It’s sloppy and dirty as your tongues intertwined.

This seems to rile him up as he starts fully thrusting into your filled cunt once more.

God you hope the tea thing was true

🍓 I need to go to bed, my eyes hurt from lack of sleep ( ◜◡༎ຶ). Also sorry for all the smut my brain has just been 𓀐𓂸 all week. ALSO! Thank you for 300 followers ya'll are the best (ง ˃ ³ ˂)ว ⁼³₌₃⁼³

🍓edit: I have 700 followers now THANK YOU!!!

🍓UPDATE 2 800FOLLOWERS?!? YALL ARE INSANE

🍓 Update 3 i no longer like this, I’ll make a remake eventually, but I hope this short sweet fic makes y’all happy. I really pushed this off because I’m no longer happy with it. But I finished it. I wanna move on to other things. But expect more fanfic of him. Actually fuck it if enough people want a part two I’ll make a longer smuttier one. Sorry if you didn’t get tagged when u asked by notifications are all full. Also need more fanfic of this man I’m feral.

@ethereal1l @lovelymiraix @yoriichisc0msl4t2 @yoriichis-love @sush1trasher @aweebontheinternet2005 @xiernia @anemoneorc @lovelymiraix @ethereal1l @weebflames @azuriel-kinayoko @lovingyeet @krillfromsky @rjssierjrie @t0miejins @yuyuchann1 @genshinsimpforlif @hyunjinslefteyeball4 @puddingchoo

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #kny #ds #Yoriichi #yoriichi tsugikuni #yoriichi x reader #yoriichi tsugikuni x reader #smut

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wheresmymilliondollarman · 11 months

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aaron warner x ferrars! reader pt. 4

(continuation from part three)

who knew running a new country was so hard? spoiler alert: apparently everyone but you and your sister. your asylum days never looked so simple.

a/n: hi… i’m back 🔥🔥 i’d like to start by apologizing for the stupid long wait. it was unfair to my readers and i swear i had no intention to leave people waiting. i genuinely forget sometimes people really like my writing </3 and i truly am grateful to the people who read. let’s jus say i have been busy and yet so unmotivated for the littlest things. i won’t bore w the details i’m sure y’all are jus happy i finally posted part 4. again REALLY sorry for the wait and pls enjoy. also now adding borders to my fics (ill edit the old ones too)

word count: 9k

warnings: few plot changes, fights and feuds, violence and blood mention, castle slander, angst, buzzcut aaron 😣😣😣

things were finally looking up for the rebellion. you'd manage to overthrow the supreme commander and his army, the reestablishment no longer ruled over your part of the land - making it open to new possibilities of government.

you never wished you paid attention in your social studies classes until now.

there were so many regulations you had to learn, matters you had to discuss, and, of course, the never-ending paperwork. your least favorite part. it didn't help you were behind on learning the fancy terminology for topics. 'can't people ever just say what they mean?'

juliette's optimism for being a leader was diminishing every time she had to meet with castle on strategy. he poorly disguised his disapproval of leadership upon every encounter.

but you learned to ignore it along the way. it wasn't as if he was ever the perfect leader either, plus you'd get the gist of the whole leadership thing soon. you silently prayed.

in the midst of all the responsibilities, you had to keep aaron from killing kenji most of the time. they were originally getting on somewhat friendly enough terms, but that was before the incident occurred.

that day, kenji barged in with urgency into your room as you were looking over papers. he went on to say there was a 'serious' problem, and you worriedly assumed it had to do with the reestablishment. but it instead involved your boyfriend.

"seriously kenji? i thought we were under attack or someone died!"

"someone will die if you don't handle your boyfriend right now. hopefully better than you've been handling being supreme comm-" kenji was cut off by the click of a gun.

"i dare you to finish your sentence."

with the barrel to his head, kenji quickly defended his words with the barrel to his head. aaron and him bickered back and forth. kenji turned to you for help, but all you did was shrug and mouth 'karma.' then he hit kenji's head with said gun.

"okay, that's enough, can someone explain to me what the issue is here?"

"this is the issue." aaron then turned to reveal chunks of different sizes along the back of his head. you gasp at his ruined hair.

"oh my god, kenji what the hell did you do?"

"i gave him a trim just like he asked!"

this made another argument burst out between the two. kenji denying his mistake and aaron picking the gun back up and threatening to kill him.

"aaron put the gun down."

aaron reluctantly does so, but his glare at kenji doesn't drop.

"phew, thanks, princess."

"kenjii since you "trimmed" warner's hair, i think it's only fair that he does the same to yours." you proclaim.

kenji looks toward you in horror, "no way!"

aaron wastes no time in going to the bathroom and returning with a razor. he gives him a terrifying smile, "i'm only going to trim the edges."

kenji bolted out of the room a second later, complaining about favoritism on the way out.

aaron ended up having no choice but to shave the rest of his hair, leaving him with a military-style buzz cut. you would mourn the longer hair, but truthfully, it did nothing to tarnish his looks.

sector 45, after sending several invitations, finally received a rvsp for an international leadership conference held at your sector. from oceania, is what delalieu told you and juliette.

you started to come to the realization about the lack of history you knew about warner. sure, you knew him deeply now, but you knew so little about his past. castle made it evident when he mentioned to you and juliette his possible connection to oceania's leaders. castle, annoyingly, did not disclose anymore and insisted aaron needed to be the one to tell. yet, he judged how little you both knew about oceania.

warner being immersed into his work left little time for that. while aaron had been helpful in your learning some etiquettes, he'd been closing off his emotions since he father's death. even after many attempts of trying to get him to open up, he vowed he was okay. you had a slim to none chance of prying information about oceania from him.

you felt lost and angry. for being supreme commanders, you and juliette seemed to be almost always out of the loop. castle regarded you as experiments, seeing how two naive teenage girls could survive being leaders. the rest of the world wasn't any different.

you offered the idea of just reading castle's mind, but juliette thought it could lead to mistrust toward you. she believed you both needed to remain calm for the moment, which is what you have done so far. but you were getting a bit bitter playing nice for so long.

at times you felt juliette left you of the leadership issues. she insisted to be the one to tackle meetings and discussion with castle, she sometimes gave answers before even discussing it with you, and even delalieu seemed to report everything to her first before it got to you. you would never bring it up, and just wrote it off as her still getting the hang of everything. but in the back of your mind you worried it was only a foreshadow.

on the way to see the new headquarters, castle rushed to you. he begged you and juliette to reconsider taking warner with you to greet the guest downstairs. you had no clue what he was on about, but played along and told him warner wasn't needed. you quickly caught on to the situation.

you rushed back to your room, put on what you deemed appropriate clothing and freshened up your hair and face. you were still putting on your shoes when you left.

on the way, you thought about how odd it was juliette didn't even bother to inform you. even if you were busy, you both had pagers to contact one another for important events such as this one.

you hear sounds of greetings as you approach the reception. you luckily hadn't missed out on much.

you see kenji along side juliette and feel a pang of betrayal. juliette was subtly shocked and kenji was confused to see you. but you cover it up with a smile as you turn to see the guest.

"apologies for my delay, i was held up with some prior matters." you hold a hand out, "it's a pleasure to meet you, i'm y/n."

the guest introduces himself as haider, and you can't help but notice a glint of recognition as he looks you over.

but that was forgotten as you came to find out haider wasn't aware of the fact sector 45 had another supreme commander as it wasn't mentioned on the invitation. you told him it must've been a mistake, but you threw a questioning glance to juliette.

you felt yourself get lost as the meeting when on. haider didn’t make it discreet he knew warner very well. he made a brief comment on his relationship with the other supreme commander children.

“i’ve got to say, when i first heard about warner being involved with a girl — i had strong doubts. he has never been the relationship type. unless you count lena. oh, but i’m sure you know all about her by now. they were together for almost two-years after all.”

you had no idea who lena was, but you had a strong sense you wouldn’t like the answer. haider had obviously knew this, and faked ignorance with his comment.

“oh. he hasn’t mentioned his ex-girl friend?”

your heart dropped. you glanced at kenji and juliette from the side of your eyed and they held the same face of surprise. you did your best to remain unphased with a polite smile.

“must’ve just not been important enough to discuss. like right now. i’d prefer if we got back on track of the topic instead of digging into my personal relations.”

if haider was impressed or offended he didn’t show and shifted subjects. you tried your best to listen in as juliette spoke with him about dinner, but the thought of warner having an ex-girlfriend floated around in your mind for the rest of the meeting.

the second haider left the room, and you all burst into a discussion for the next step. dinner would be in less than an hour, and you were still filled in with little to no information about haider and his intentions. you knew the next step would be for you to talk to aaron about it, but you weren’t sure you could be alone with him with this newfound information about his past. you got juliette and kenji to come along with you to question him under the excuse that it would be easier than relaying whatever he told you.

before you three could do that, you didn’t forget their actions before this meeting. you knew it would be the worst time to discuss especially with how limited time was, but you spoke without thinking when you saw juliette heading towards the door.

“why didn’t you tell me about this meeting?”

she sighs and brushes you off saying it wasn’t the most important subject right now. but you already begin, so you thought you might as well get some answers, and pushed her for an explanation.

“we’re suppose to be in this together, how could you leave me in the dark—”

“because i didn’t think you could handle it, and quite frankly, castle agreed with me.”

“what?” you were dumfounded by her response.

“you’ve been so unruly lately, and i get it doing this whole supreme commander thing has been challenging — but i couldn’t afford anything with this meeting.”

“unruly? just because i don’t want to listen to every little thing castle says. news flash, he’s made it quite clear he doesn’t support us leading sector 45.”

“he knows far more than us, we should take what he says wisely.”

“j has a point y/n, castle has a lot of experience—” kenji intercepts.

“shut up! you’re just as guilty as juliette. i thought we were friends and then you help juliette hide this meeting from me!” you spit at kenji.

he stays silent, for once. but it says more than enough for you. you turn your bitterness back to your sister.

“was it his idea to only put down you as the supreme commander on the invitations, too?”

“yes.” she reluctantly admits. “castle wasn’t sure if the idea of two supreme commanders would go well over with orher sectors. i swear, y/n, i only found out once they were already sent.”

you didn’t care for reasoning. you were angry at it all. “i agreed to do this for you! it was you wanted us to do this together! ”

“and maybe i’m starting to regret that.”

your face dropped. juliette’s eyes widened as she realized the weight of her words. but it was too late to apologize.

you scoff, “alright. fine. go ahead and do it yourself. go and question warner about haider yourself and talk to castle and beg for his help for dinner. because i’m done being supreme commander. but it’s not like i ever was, right?”

you can’t help but leave a final comment before you stalk out the door, “you know what’s funny? i found out about the meeting because castle wanted me to tell you to not do it on your own, to bring warner, he said. guess you’re unruly to him too.”

with limited options of locations juliette, kenji, or warner wouldn’t be able to find you, you had to resort to being hiding in your old room you were once held captive in.

now less clouded by anger, you facepalmed yourself. perhaps just quitting being supreme commander had been a rash decision. you weren’t even quite sure if you could just quit like that. but you would rather be jobless than take back your words to juliette.

maybe she was right, you are quite unruly. but you had no plans to admit it to her.

you thought back to aaron. you wanted his comfort, but you still were upset about the ex-girlfriend situation. even if you said it was important, you had somewhat of a right to know when your boyfriend was in a past relationship.

you hated how castle was right about how much you lack knowledge about aaron’s history. and you know you should probably be there with kenji and juliette talking to aaron, but you were too prideful, and a little embarrassed to do so.

so you collected yourself as made your way back to your room (taking twists and turns to avoid anyone you didn’t want to see) to prepare yourself mentally and physically for the dinner to come.

unfortunately for you, aaron was sitting on your bed waiting for your return when you stepped into the room. you we’re unsure on how to greet him since he likely was informed about earlier events through juliette and kenji.

“oh my god, you scared me.”

“my apologies, amor. but i had to see you after you you didn’t arrive with kenji and juliette when they went to ask me about haider.”

you went into your closet as he spoke from your bed, picking out a nice dress for dinner. “got into a fight with them and it didn’t end well. then i dramatically quit being supreme commander.” you explained nonchantly.

he was taken aback, “you quit? just like that?”

“yeah.” you confirm walking out the closet with a lilac dress on arm, “you think this’ll be good enough, or it it too much?”

“you’ll look astonishing as always. but don’t change the topic, what happened to that headstrong nature of yours i admire? you can’t just give up after a silly fight.”

you groan, and toss the dress on tour bef next to him, “i really don’t want to talk about it right now. can’t you just tell me what shoes go with this dress?”

“amor.” aaron stands up and interwines his hands in yours, “please don’t shut me out.”

you bitterness rose back up at his words and you drop aaron’s hands. “that’s ironic coming from you.”

“amor, please don’t pick a fight with me.”

“castle once told me i didn’t know you as well as i thought. and he’s right, aaron. any mention of your past and you close right up.”

aaron sighs, “i’m not an open person, you know this. it’s harder for me to talk about my personal life than it is for you. but i mean it when i say i am trying for you.”

“really? then why didn’t you even bother to mention you knew haider. or how about the fact you have an ex-girlfriend! you know how embarrassing it was for someone from a different continent to tell you more than you knew about your boyfriend?”

“lena?” he asks furrowing his brows. “she was barely a girlfriend. haider likely only mentioned her to rile you up and it’s working, so please calm down.”

“oh my god. there you go again! you want to just sweep it under the rug, and i’m tired of it. all i want is a little more openness from you.”

“i have been open, there’s no one closer to my heart than you. please understand that just certain subject are—“

“hard to talk about, yeah i’ve got that.” you exasperated. “i just think it’s important to mention a two-year relationship.”

“it was purely physical.”

your heart stings. “so, physical relationships just mean nothing to you? everything physical we’ve shared hasn’t meant anything to you?”

“that’s not what i meant. i was different back then!”

you turn around, “just go warner. i’d like to be alone right now before dinner.”

aaron didn’t anything else, he knew your word was final. not because of his sense of your emotions, but by the fact you used his last name.

in less than an hour you managed to fight with every person close to you. and you had to see said people at dinner in less than ten minutes. somehow, you blamed castle for your luck.

delalieu knocked on your door to escort you to dinner. you weren’t sure of aaron had told him to or perhaps he had pity that you would be entering alone. either way you were happy to walk with someone you weren’t upset with.

luckily, you had arrived before the guests did. but unluckily, kenji, juliette, and aaron were already there. your usual spot was next to aaron and infront of juliette, kenji sometimes next to you or her. but juliette sat at the head of the table now, kenji to her right and aaron to her left. you had no choice but to awkwardly sit next to warner due to the limited seating. plus you’d rather not show haider theres issues amongst you four.

kenji and juliete silently conversed, your sister ignored you fully while kenji glimpsed at you with a small frown. you could feel aaron turn in your direction, but your gaze focused on the empty seat next to you.

haider arrived shortly, greeted aaron first with a hug, one aaron was visibly discomforted by. then discreetly spoke, both using arabic tongues. which none of you knew he had. ypu almost choke on nothing as he casually reveals aaron know seven languages. the rest of you greeted him curtly, and he took a seat in front of you.

haider wasn’t the only guest at the dinner, his sister nazeera showing up was a bit of a surprise to the rest of you.

nazeera is gorgeous, with her smooth carmel complexion, dark eyes and strong features. her face held diamonds percing; two on her eyebrow and one below her lip. she wore a wrap that covered her whole hair, and it did nothing to lessen her beauty — it enhanced it.

she stared at juliette before she turned to you. you were unsure of the expression she held, and part of you wanted to just find out yourself, but you knew better.

both you and juliette stood up to greet her, and she accepted politely. she gave aaron a mere nod then proceeded to sit down next to you, instead of her brother. but if anything it gave you more of a reason to not talk to the people beside you.

aaron started the conversation about her scraf, but kenji was the one who made an offhanded comment regarding her head scarf, which you learned was called a hijab, claiming it was banned to wear them since it was stabled with religion. nazeera didn’t shy away from answering, she stood her stance and didn’t care for reestablishment rules despite being a supreme commander’s daughter.

nazeera has a sharp tongue and kenji was not prepared for it. you tried to hide you smile as kenji got more flustered with his words. she was highly more likable than her brother.

“are all the other supreme commander kids like this?” you ask her.

“only the ones who aren’t insufferable.” she stands up from her seat, “so, no,” she tells you with a wink. nazeera then announces her departures and leaves the dining table.

you had a good feeling about her. and even though you and juliette were at odds, you knew she also admired nazeera already.

aaron and kenji bickered a bit before haider bid his goodbyes. aaron took the liberty of escorting him to his quarters. a job that likely should’ve been done by you or juliette, but frankly, you didn’t like the guy much to care.

now juliette, kenji, and you sat in an awkward silence. part of you wanted to mend things with your sister, but majority of you felt she should take the first step. kenji looked ready to say something, but held his tongue.

you figured it was the most you’ll get, so you mumbled a goodbye and headed off to your room.

half way there, you stopped. even if you felt you were the one in the right, you were ready to make the first move if it meant rehashing things with your sister and best friend. you rerouted back to the dining room.

before you could enter, you heard talking. you peeked through the slit of the open door and saw nazeera, juliette, and kenji talking.

suddenly, and ugly feeling boiled in your stomach. seeing them all conversing (mainly juliette and nazeera because kenji was mixing his words) made you realize how perfect the three looked together. almost natural. it made you think of how easy it would be to replace you. nazeera would be the one teasing and messing with kenji. nazeera would be the sister you imagined juliette wished she had instead — one who was confident, witted, and courageous. everything you lacked these days.

maybe they just didn’t need you nearly as much as you needed them.

you couldn’t even place your vexation on nazeera. you just met her today, and she was already someone you knew was amazing as she presented herself.

you never entered the dining room. you left before anyone could notice you dejectedly walking away.

the following morning wasn’t better. delalieu knocked on your just as the sun was starting to rise, your restless sleep did nothing to help wake you up. he informed you you’d been invited to accompany haider, and nazeera would likely be joininng. you nodded, thanked him, and sent him on his way.

as soon as the door closed, you grabbed the nearest pillow and screamed into it. haider was already being a pain, and it was his second day.

worst part was, delalieu failed to mention haider had also invited others.

you were unpleasantly surprised to see all three of the people you quarreled with arriving after you.

you weren’t sure who to walk aside. but on instinct you stood next to aaron before you could remember your vendetta. juliette was on one side of haider and you were on the other. nazeera and kenji followed closely behind.

it was unbearably silent the first few steps, there wasn’t a word uttered. the tension would’ve needed a axe to cut.

you couldn’t help but peek at aaron from the side of your eye. you quickly looked forward when you accidentally made eye contact. he sighed quietly after. you hated how badly you had to clench your fist to prevent yourself from latching it onto his.

haider broke the silence. he asked warner if he would be attending the continental symposium. you and juliette only knew briefly about it. no one ever mentioned the nature of the event to either of you.

but when juliette inferred haider about it, you both realized how big the event was.

“i wasn’t sure whether you’d both attend since the late supreme commander anderson has never attended public gathering.”

“we’ll both very much be there.” you add in quickly.

“of course, we aren’t hiding from the world,” juliette adds in, “when will it be?”

haider’s eye slightly widened as if she asked an incredulous question. but it made sense after he revealed it would be in two days. he innocently answered, but you knew he was satisfied having caught juliette off guard.

“it’s really my fault for that. juliette’s been so diligent with managing all other issues i thought it would be better if i took it off her shoulder’s and handled it. but silly me, i’d forgotten to keep her posted on the date.”

you jumped in with an excuse to defend your sister because even if you two weren’t on good terms, you wouldn’t let someone try to toy with her.

juliette looks to you grateful for the help, and you give her a small smile in return.

aaron added in, “she’s right, we’re finalizing the program with delalieu today, who is hard at work planning the details.”

you give his hand a tight squeeze as a ‘thank you’. but as you try to let go, aaron’s hand engulfs your tightly to stop you. you try to wiggle your hand a little, but eventually it it be.

you bite the inside of your cheek to keep you from smiling.

aaron asks haider for his plans during the remainder of his stay. he mentions catching up with old friends then goes on to say juliette and you must’ve received numerous invitations from the other kids of supreme commanders.

“we haven’t gotten the whole group together in far too long,” haider says.

you raise a brow, “whole group? just how many of you are there?”

suddenly everyone stops as haider’s demeanor goes from unauthentic sincerity to ice cold. it almost scares you.

he harshly grabs aaron’s arm,wretching your hands apart, and pulls him forward. haider asks angrily if he’s shared little to nothing about ‘them’ with you.

“you turn your back on us for this — this child? how stupid could you be? you have to know it won’t end well, i promise you that.”

“hey! let go.” you protest.

haider scoffs and ignores you. “i thought it couldn’t be true you’d fallen for a psychotic girl’s insignificant freak sister. i defended you, just to find out it all true. what the hell happened to you?”

you’d had enough shoved him away with your gift, hard enough to cause him to stumble back a little.

haider was stunned by the sudden force then notices the red aura from your hand.

“what did you just do?”

you shrug, “how could a child like me do something? but if you touch him like that again you’ll end up just like the last supreme commander. i promise you that.”

“is that a threat?”

“why don’t you find out?”

haider laughs, almost delighted by the fact you threatened to basically kill him. everyone else unintentionally lets out a breathe they didn’t know they were holding, especially juliette who had been ready to intervene.

haider requested to speak with aaron alone, promising to keep his hands to himself. you and aaron shared a look, and you knew he’d be alright. he gives you a smile that was made for you, and you return it.

the fight from the say before was long forgotten. you knew no matter how many fights you’d have, you’d do almost anything for him.

part of you still hoped for a grand apology, but this would be more than enough. now, you hoped to eventually make amends with the other two.

you walked off, not quite sure the destination. you figured you might as well go on a walk yourself since the planned one got disrupted. but a hand grabbed your arm to stop you.

“hey, uhm,” it’s juliette’s voice, “do you think we could talk? i mean..later because we’re all so busy and obviously you have stuff to do-“

“yeah.” you smile, “i’d like that.”

you both share heartfelt grins. you wave at kenji and nazeera from your spot and walk back toward the base. this time, with a happier kick in your step.

a good few steps in — you felt it, an abrupt change in the environment. it was almost too eerie, and you realized there was no one in sight, not even the guards who are meant to follow you from a generous distance.

you came to the conclusion it was no accident when the first shot punctured your shoulder. the second through your side.

you scream in agony to as you attempt to flee from the open, but more bullets ensue. you manage to block a few with your energy, but the pain was painful enough to leave some to hit your busy, such as your thigh. but the one that made you topple over was a bullet near the chest, in almost the same spot anderson once shot you.

you managed to block it before it was a fatal hit, but it hit you enough to be painful and draw blood.

you were half conscious, the world foggy and blurry in your eyes. you felt someone approach you and kneel down to tower over your defenseless body. a sudden pressure on your neck woke you up enough to understand this person was choking you to kill you.

you used whatever energy you had left to try and push the person off of you. the lack of oxygen and the increase of black spots made it hard for you to focus on pushing the person off.

your adrenaline kicked in to created enough power to get the man off of you. as soon as he groan in pain, you started to feebly crawl away from the perpetuator. your blood likely dragging on the concrete now. but they composed fast, and grabbed onto your ankle. you fid what you could and grabbed the nearest rock and hit them on the head with it. but ir wasn’t enough to stop them from grabbing you again.

at that point you were worn out, too tired to even move a muscle. the loss of blood was starting to make you woozy, and the bullets seemed far more painful than you remembered. you couldn’t register you were on the verge of death.

but the pressure on your neck never returned. instead came the noises of violent punches and broken bones. a new person crouched beside you, you knew they meant you no harm as they assessed your wounds and chanted assuring words.

in your deliriousness, you babbled on about how they looked like your friend kenji, one whom you fought with and missed so much.

“i’m sure your friend misses you too.” kenji responds, doing his best to keep you awake.

you blacked when another person, stronger than the first, carefully carried you and rushed toward the base.

in the medical bay, you were in and out of consciousness. you remember sara and sonya hurriedly tending you, kenji freaking out in the back, and aaron worriedly beside you. your first thought was, ‘where’s juliette?’

unbeknownst to you at the time, juliette was getting her wounds treated as well. she had been shot too, but not nearly as fatal as you. she was caught off guard alone as well, but her attacker only aimed to disable her. nazeera had been near by when she heard the commotion and saved her.

juliette was shot moments before you, and aaron believed it was worked as a distraction so your assailant could successfully kill you.

kenji was the one to find you. after juliette had been injured, he went to find you and arrived in the nick of time.

it took almost two days before you could wake up fully without passing out every minute. the first face you saw was aaron — who was already at your beside, holding your hand tightly — almost like he was praying.

when he noticed you’d woken up, his face became relaxed. he pecked you on the lips before badgering you with questions about your state. you assured him you were alright, and had to repeat it over and over.

your body still ached greatly due to the poison laced in the bullets sara and sonya explained to you. your wounds were healed, but there were still possibility of hallucinations from the poison.

after asking for your sister, sara had informed you of her situation, but quickly told you she was alright after seeing your worried eyes.

the culprits had been caught and sent to the holding cells, but they had refused to cooperate. meaning there was zero information on who was behind both your attacks.

aaron was monitoring you intently, when you sat up he rushed to help. he hadn’t stopped holding onto you since you woke up, as if you’d disappear if he let go. his eyes were red-rimmed, but you didn’t comment on it.

you felt bad for giving him a near-death scare again, and berated yourself for leaving yourself vulnerable. even worse, since your sister had also been hurt. aaron put the blame on himself for leaving you unattended.

no matter what you said, warner seemed distraught. his eyes told you there was more to the issue, he was holding back. as he remembered what the issue was, he grew distant. his grip on your hand loosened.

“is everything okay?”

“as long as you’re okay, amor.” he smiles but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “i have to speak with you about something.”

“about what?”

“not here. let’s get you out of here and cleaned up before we talk.”

you nod. you were more than ready to get out the the med bay. your thoughts went to the coming symposium, with you and juliette being temporarily mia, there was likely a plethora of things still needed to get done.

you were happy to finally get a chance to shower. the grime and blood were now down the drain. once done, you changed and went back into your room where aaron was waiting.

before he could get a word in, you embraced him tightly, and he didn’t hesitate to hold you. after almost dying, you just wanted the comfort of aaron. kenji would call you crazy for putting ‘comfort’ and ‘aaron’ in the same sentence.

you kiss him, after what’s felt like forever. it’s not fiery or rushed, but deliberate and emotional. everything was gone from your surrounding for a moment, it was just the two of you. you felt safe. but then aaron pulled away from you, and held onto your hands.

“amor, i need to tell you something. it’s important.” his eyes are looking at everywhere but you.

“you can tell me anything.” you reassure.

he takes a deep breath, running a hand through his blonde hair. your nerves begin to spike, you’ve never seen aaron so hesitant to speak, he’s almost scared.

“i’ll start from the beginning.”

and he did. he told you the start of the reestablishment, their campaigns, ideals, and plans to take over. then, he shifts to the ‘unnatural’s’ and how after they were discovered, they were exploited by the reestablishment.

aaron tells you about two girls who were willingly given over to the reestablishment to be experimented and tested on. you were getting confused on where the conversation was going.

“aaron, why are you explaining all this?”

“because one of those girls is juliette.”

you didn’t know what to say, you were thrown into a loop you still weren’t fully comprehending.

“i don’t understand..”

“the parents you lived with weren’t your biological ones. y/n, you’re both adopted.”

your reality was warped in a matter of seconds. you never felt connected to your ‘parents’, but finding out you came from a different family?

“w-wait… so the people juliette and i lived with for almost our entire lives aren’t our parents?” aaron nods.

“so where are our biological parents? are they alive? wait… who’s the other girl you mentioned before?”

your head was jumbled up, you were trying to get so many answering at once while still trying to process.

aaron closes his eyes for a second before the green is visible again. “that other girl is juliette’s sister. but it’s not you, amor. you and juliette are not biologically related.”

you were frozen, as if time itself had stopped. you free from aaron’s hands and distance yourself. everything had change.

aaron keeps speaking, saying he only knew of juliette’s real sister and parents and sister until recently. castle was the one who told him the information to put the pieces together. castle was the one who urged him to tell you because the reestablishment was was coming, very soon.

“there was no record of you before you were adopted, i had always assumed it was only juliette adopted. it was only after you came here and i ran your dna, along with juliette’s, did i find yours different from your parents.”

juliette wasn’t actually your sister. the parents and girl you grew up with aren’t related to you at all. everytime you talked to aaron about were grateful for juliette as a sister, he knew the truth the whole time.

it took you five minute of speak again. you didn’t care for the rest at the moment, you still had to have another question of yours answered.

“if juliette’s biological parents work for the reestablishment, where are mine?”

“i swear, i had no idea-“

“please. just tell me.”

the more you heart, the more your heart shatters. to stay and watch over sector 45 while his father left to the capital, anderson had him prove himself. it started with emmaline, juliette’s real sister. he was in charge of her imprisonment and torture. but then his father sent him one more task before he was supreme commander.

anderson transported a man and woman to sector 45, aaron was commanded to get information, by any means, out of them. it went on for a year, until anderson saw no value in keeping them anymore.

his father ordered a public execution, and aaron did as he was told. only when finding a journal of his father just hours before you woke up did he get the identity of those people. your parents.

it was the final straw to send you spiraling. you don’t know if you got on the floor or started yelling first. aaron knelt down next to you, trying to soothe you, but it was only making it worse.

you don’t even feel the tears are running down your face. aaron apologizes over and over saying, no matter how many times you told him to stop. you could only keep saying ‘why?’ over and over.

‘why did you keep this from me?’

‘why didn’t you tell me sooner?’

when aaron tried holding you, you roughly shoved him away. his touch no longer felt loving. instead, it became poisonous.

“don’t touch me.”

“amor, please. i love you, so much.”

“you don’t know how to love anyone. you’re a fucking coward.”

the room was suffocating you. you felt trapped and had to get out of there. you got up and booked it out the door, not stopping when aaron called out your name.

you keeping running and let your legs guide you to your destination. the moment you spotted the white door, you came to a halt.

you barge in with no warning, startling the two people in the room. you take big step toward your target and, without hesitation, you slap castle.

“oh my god— what the hell, y/n!”

kenji’s presence does nothing to stop you, “did you have your kicks keeping secrets from us this entire time?”

castle sighs, now unphased by your violence, “i assume warner told you.”

“we trusted you! and all you did was keep us in the dark about our own fucking life!”

“what the hell is going on?”

“does juliette know?”

“i talked to her not long before warner went to you.”

‘oh god,’ you thought. you worried that was the reason juliette has lacked to see you since you’ve woken up.

“miss ferrars, it was not my intention to cause pain to your or your sis— juliette.”

his error struck a nerve, “no, but it was your intention to be a liar and snake, screw you.”

you stormed out in a rage, not before doing a 180 on castle’s desk. you hoped he’d have the worst time cleaning up.

you ran. out of his office and out of the compound. away from it all. you finally stopped after being knee-deep into a forest.

not caring for your surroundings, you sat down on the nearest large rock. it was then you realized how much energy you exhausted. you took in deep breaths to regain your breathing stability. the oxygen filled your lung helped to calm you down for the first time in the past hour.

with no one around, you finally had the time to think straight without anger and despair clouding your judgement. you weren’t even sure if you could exhaust anymore tears.

but it turned out you did. going through the events of the past hour, didn’t help with processing as you thought it would. it only made you relive the heart-ache.

took half an hour to calm down your sobbing. but it was oddly comforting doing it in a place no one would hear you.

you decided didn’t wanna focus on everything you learned. not on aaron. not on being adopted. not on juliette not being your sister. not on your parents being dead before you got the chance to meet them.

you focused on what you could control — the coming continental symposium. it would be in less than a day. you had nothing prepared, not even attire; much less a speech.

you had no idea how you could show up and presume your personality from before. how could you face the supreme commander kids in a state like this? your thoughts wondered to juliette on what her plan would be. but then it hit you; how was juliette handling it?

when you thought about it, you hadn’t seen her all day. she didn’t see you when you woke up, nor before you and aaron talked. she likely didn’t take this news lightly, especially regarding her sister.

thinking about juliette having a sister, that wasn’t you, was painful. your bond wouldn’t be the same. you weren’t blood, juliette no longer had a reason to stand by your side.

despite telling yourself not to, you thought back to warner. his betrayal hurt deeper than castle’s. how could you trust him again? you couldn’t. it was over.

time passed like nothing being amongst nature. the once light blue sky, turned orange with pink hues, signaling the end of the day. you knew you couldn’t hide forever. you had to find juliette.

if your theory was right then juliette was not in her room. you brainstormed possible locations when you bumped into kenji.

“y/n? thank god, everyone’s been worried about where you went, and juliette—“

“where juliette? i need to see her now.”

“y/n… warner told me everything. i know it must be hard for you both, but i think typu both need some spac—“

you snap, “just tell me where she is kenji!”

“she’s not in the best state.”

“take me to her. now.”

kenji reluctantly leads you to the door of anderson’s office. when you saw it was locked, you pounded on the wood relentlessly.

“c’mon, let’s just go.” kenji persists.

“juliette! open the door!”

“go away.”

“juliette, please let me in. i wanna talk.”

“i don’t wanna speak to you.”

“well, i do.”

“you’re not my real sister, so leave me alone!”

“fine,” you scoff, “hopefully you treat your new sister a lot better than your treating me right now.”

“fuck you.”

“fuck you too!” you throw back.

“…bad time to say i told you so?”

you rolled your eyes at kenji’s remark and walk away. your anger resurged, and you needed somewhere to blow off steam. training room had been unfortunate to be your victim.

when you saw no one in sight, you took it as a sign to proceed. in a matter of seconds, objects where tossed across the room through your levitation. weights were scattered, some broken, benches were bent out of shape, even a few treadmills weren’t so kindly spared. you’d feel bad about the damage later, but it felt so good in that moment to get angry.

it was dark outside when your adrenaline was closing to nothing. your only had energy to sit on a mat laid across the floor. you figured you’d take a quick power nap before going back to your room to sleep.

as soon as you closed you eyes, you were passed out. you’d hadn’t realized just how much of your energy you exerted.

aaron warner was getting back from his debriefing with delalieu, when the open door of the training room caught his eyes.

he was more than dismayed to see the damage done to what once was the training center. he was irritated that he’d have to replace basically all equipment. aaron assumed there was violent fight that happened, but then his eyes fell upon your form sleeping soundly on the floor.

now, he was more impressed than annoyed at the damage done. he would’ve been slightly proud of he wasn’t the reason for you to lash out so brutally.

aaron picked up your limp body in his arms, and carried you off to bed; taking advantage of holding you again. because he wasn’t sure the next time he’d be able to.

you were disoriented after waking up in your room, wondering how you ended up in your room when you’d fell asleep in the training room. you threw the possibly of sleeping walking to bed in, but then decides you didn’t care much for finding out.

it had been much later than you anticipated, and you were surprised no one woke you up. you dressed swiftly and headed out the door, despite a dreading feeling brewing in your gut.

first stop was to find delalieu, who actually found you first. he informed you the arrival of the newest guests and listened as he listed name. you stopped when he uttered the word ‘lena.’

“lena? as in warner’s ex-girlfriend?”

delalieu says nothing, but his eyes are looking at the ground. ‘so that’s a yes.’

great, you thought. you broke up less than twenty four hours ago and his ex already shows up.

then delalieu tells you juliette is already greeting guests, so your presence is not mandatory. he likely knows all of yesterday’s events, including your fight with her, so he’s likely trying to prevent conflict before the symposium.

a stronger person would’ve bitten the bullet and showed up anyway. but you weren’t that stronger person today. you would take to chance to avoid people you didn’t wanna see at any point.

perhaps it was a coward’s way, but you believed after everything, you were entitled to have at least one day.

you busied yourself in the office of your room; approving symposium plan and decor, looking through letters, and going through anderson’s old files — provided by delalieu.

kenji came to see you three hours before the symposium. you pretended to not here it the first couple times he knocked, but he was annoyingly persistent.

you weren’t mad at kenji, he didn’t know anything before you. but didn’t mean seeing him was easy, his presence always reminded you of juliette. you three had always hung out. now he was stuck in the middle.

kenji told you nazeera wanted to speak with you, so you granted her permission to enter. nazeera was quick to her point and told you the reestablishment’s plan; destroying sector 45. she advised you and juliette presented yourself strong at the event, to show everyone you’re a formidable enemy. plus, there was the possibility of sudden danger because of the plans the reestablishment had for juliette and you.

you found sudden danger was just always a given in your life.

you weren’t sure how you and juliette could show up united, you both were at odds and still processing everything you’ve been told. it would be nearly impossible to act as if nothing has changed.

were you even still supreme commander? you weren’t sure you ever ‘unquit’.

but, differences would have to be put aside. because everyone will be watching for your next move. and it may or may not lead to the demise of sector 45.

you missed just shooting and punching enemies.

kenji stuck around after nazeera left. you both discussed the danger to come. then, he filled you in on anything you missed, juliette’s buzzcut, warner sulking, the new guests, and, your favorite, lena being humbled by juliette.

apparently, she’d been ‘eager’ to meet you and asked juliette about your whereabouts. she referred to you as an ‘ex-girlfriend’ is what kenji told you. how she knew about the break up, you had no idea.

juliette looked her up and down before telling her you don’t waste your time with other insignificant to you.

you couldn’t help but laugh, maybe you were judging lena before knowing her, but based on that interaction; it told you enough.

once kenji left to get ready, you decided you’d do the same.

your nerves spiked the closer it got time for the big event. you spent a good hour deciding what would be best to wear. you hadn’t realized you relied on warner for fashion help until that moment.

you settled on a floor-length gown with beautiful embroidered and beaded details. you tried to avoid putting any accessories gifted to you by warner, but it was nearly impossible.

you attempted a makeup look, and you thought you did a pretty good job. and if not, kenji never frayed from being brutally honest to your face.

a guard knocked at your door to alert you that it was time. you cross your finger before exiting the room. time to face everyone you’d been avoiding.

everyone who was to go to the symposium was gathered outside the base, awaiting the vehicle to take them to the meeting location. as expected, everyone was dressed formally.

warner was quick to spot you and hurriedly walked to you. you power walked to get away from him, and hopefully find someone you liked at the moment. but, nonetheless, he caught up to you.

“i don’t wanna talk to you.”

“please, amor. hear me out.”

warner pulls you close to him, holding your hands hostage at his chest. you look into his eyes, and you can see how tired he looks. he’s hadn’t slept well, and it was obvious.

“what could you possibly have to say to me?”

“what could i possibly not have to say to you?”

“i’m sure you rather entertain you’re ex-girlfriend over day, glaring daggers to us.”

“you know that’s not true.”

“do i? i don’t know anything that’s true lately.”

“i love you. my hearts burns for you greatly, and a moment without you is one i can’t bare.”

“i don’t want to hear—“

“my heart has always been yours. i’ll never be able to take back everything i’ve done, but i refuse to lose you because of it.”

“aaron.”

“you can scream or yell at me all you want, if it means you’ll stay by my side.”

his forehead presses against yours. his eyes are focused on every feature of your face that hes already committed to memory.

“say you forgive me, amor.” he whispers so vulnerably.

you want to kiss him. you want everything to be magically better after. you want to believe this is another challenge you both can overcome.

but you can’t. at least no so soon.

you’re holding back tears, but aaron already has one going down his face.

“i can’t.” you distance yourself from warner. “every time i see you, i’m reminded of your betrayal. reminded how much heart-ache you’ve caused me. it can’t be so easily forgotten, aaron. not when i still love you so much.”

you were thankful to be distracted when the guards informed you the rides were here. but your thoughts switched as you noticed you’d have to be enclosed with aaron, juliette, and kenji for fifteen minutes, especially when you had to sit next to warner because juliette was just as mad at him as well.

you the were first out given the chance. you were overwhelmed by the amount of people who showed. thinking about juliette and you having to speak in-front of them all was intimidating. and likely all of them hoped for your demise. fun.

now, juliette took the podium, and you were next to her. you two have yet to discuss anything, so you’ll have to wing your speech to match the tone of hers.

but before she could start, the chaos begins. numerous people being protesting and berating both you & juliette and sector 45.

it was all getting jumbled, but there were various ‘traitors’, ‘you’re just children!’, and ‘freaks.’

to defend juliette, you move to the microphone and angrily demand everyone to quiet down, you do your best to yell over the voices rioting.

out of nowhere, the stage you’re standing on explodes. you’re both launched ten or more feet back. then chaos ensues.

theres a ringing in your ear, making it hard to hear anything; only you witness it all from the ground. people running left and right, the stage was now on fire, and men in uniform started invading the premises.

you see juliette lying on the ground not too far from you. you croak her name, then aaron’s and kenji’s, but you’re not sure if you’re even using your vocals.

you feel yourself being dragged away, you’re unmoving. you feel numb, not able to identify which parts of you are injured.

it’s all happening on slow motion in your vision.

you can see the same happening to juliette. with your head above the ground you see a new perspective. you finally see your friends, some are lying motionless, others are running.

you find kenji helping others escape and aaron with him taking down as many guards. then aaron spots you being dragged away, and his eyes widen. he’s on the move to reach for you, but his distraction leaves an opening for a soldier to take him down from behind.

it takes five soldiers to hold him down, he’s yelling your name, and you don’t react. they finally hand cuff him, not wasting a moment to inject him with something strong enough to incapacitate him.

kenji follow the same fate, not being able to get away invisible before nazeera knocks him out.

a man stands in front of you, blocking you from seeing the scene. you recognize the black expensive boots immediately.

“seems we both have a habit of not staying dead.”

anderson lunges the barrel of the pistol against your head — then it all went black.

you were so sick of seventeen.

taglist — @ravisinghs-wife @tom-pls-fuck-me @valeridarkness @fallonaurr @whatsupb18 @letspretendimnottrash @heart-an0n @mrsspector-grant @kikilarast10 @nina357 @lupinswolfsbanes (some aren’t tagging D: ) tysm for the support <3

#aaron warner x reader #aaron warner #aaron warner anderson #aaron warner imagine #aaron warner fanfic #aaron warner x female reader #x reader #reader insert #reader imagine #shatter me #x female reader #juliette ferrars #kenji kishimoto #shatter me fanfic

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rallamajoop · 9 months

Text

Lab Photos and Documents from Resident Evils 7 & 8

Near the end of both Resis 7 and 8, the player character gets to explore a laboratory full of significant documents and interesting photos, textured and angled such that it’s very hard to get a good screencap. So here’s a huge dump of all the relevant image assets I could find to extract from both game files (plus some rambling about everything that got recycled between them, because spot-the-reused-asset is still my favourite game right now).

Photos from Lucas' lab in Resident Evil 7

The photo of Mia with Eveline in front of the tanker can be found at the end of the Mia video tape, though it also shows up again in Lucas' other lab in the Not A Hero DLC. That DLC also throws in a few new photos of Lucas' creations.

And moving on a game...

Photos from Miranda's Lab in Resident Evil 8

(Apologies for the long post above the cut, but tumblr doesn't seem to let you tile images below a 'Read more', unfortunately.)

What’s interesting is that most do seem to be legitimate photos of the characters’ real-life face models, not just renders of their 3D game models. Whether the human models themselves posed for these or whether their likeness was simply photoshopped onto scenes composed without them I haven’t been able to find out (though the latter seems more likely to me, given that most face models don't even seem to have known what character their likeness would be used for). Either way, there’s an eerie realism to these that doesn’t occur in many other parts of the game, and it’s effective in its own uncanny way.

Since both games refer to the same research at the same lab, it's probably reasonable that some of RE8 photos are just slightly-adjusted copies of those from RE7 ‒ those two shots of Eveline in the lab most obviously. And we're probably just supposed to politely ignore how obviously Miranda's just been selectively edited into that original pic of Eveline with the scientists. *cough*

In fact, if you look closely, even that big group photo of Eveline with the research team and transport operatives has actually patched in both Mia and Eveline from that earlier photo of them standing in front of the tanker. In fact, Alan (Mia's partner in RE7) isn't even from a photo at all: that's a drawing from a piece concept art (no wonder they've got him standing at the back!) As a minor role who appeared in no photos in RE7, I assume they just didn't have any good shots of his face model available.

I'm a little suspicious even Miranda's face in the group shot has been edited in from one of her other photos, but the match isn't quite perfect enough for me to be sure.

Even that photo of the needle going into the egg and the developing foetus isn't new: you can see the same needle shot in some of the RE7 documents, and even the foetus development series gets an angled scan-over in the RE7 ending sequence.

Mind you, some of those "photos of Eveline" may actually not be Eveline herself ‒ text on them in the lab itself suggests they're photos of other members of the E-series, sacrificed during necrotoxin tests. Which makes it rather odd that the figure in the second photo is an adult man who looks nothing like Eveline, so I can only assume some wires got crossed somewhere in the dev team.

(Also odd: the suggestion that there were multiple E-series subjects, some of whom were put down for experimental purposes, even though Eveline herself is labeled E-001. But let's not pretend RE lore has ever been super-consistent at the best of times.)

RE8's "lab photos" also include a couple of shots of a man in snow gear who's apparently Spencer of Umbrella-fame, presumably for all those fans who don't feel it's a proper Resident Evil game if there's not an Umbrella in it somewhere. They're both about as rough as that one piece of concept art of Alan, so I'm guessing whoever created them was about as invested in that topic as I am.

Somewhat more interesting to me are the two shots of Miranda with babies. The second obvious Eveline, but the first is presumably of Miranda with Eva, way back in 1920 or so ‒ demonstrating nothing so much much as that in a full 100 years, Miranda hasn't even slightly changed how she does her eyebrows. /s

#Resident Evil Village #Resident Evil 7 #Mia Winters #Eveline #Mother Miranda #RE assets #reused assets #RE lore #meta

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literaticat · 1 year

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Hello. Just wondering what you think of the current "Roald Dahl re-write" controversy.

Hahaha I have a lot of feelings. Some of them you probably won't like? IDK.

First of all, lemme just say, Roald D was an anti-Semitic asshole, a notoriously difficult and bad man, his books are mean-spirited and rankle me, I really don't give a fig about him or his books or his legacy, and I'd never give them to a child.

(I wouldn't stop a child from reading one if they wanted to, either! I wouldn't BAN them! It's fine with me that they EXIST and are readily available for anyone who wants to read them! I just personally would not spend my money to present a child with a copy of one of his books, I think there are better things to read that I'd rather gift.)

So if you were under a rock and you didn't hear this latest "outrage", evidently the Roald Dahl estate + the UK publisher decided to do an update to a bunch of his books removing some of the particularly egregious language around things like minorities, fat people, etc. Some of the coverage of this makes it sound like they removed vast swathes of text, essentially rewriting the books. Which would obviously be insane if true. But it's not true. The changes are, as the estate put it, "small and carefully considered." There might be hundreds in total, but if they are tweaks to words across dozens of books - that's really not very many?

Anyway lots of authors are decrying it as CENSORSHIP!!!!! In my opinion... that is a little dramatic. First of all - censorship would be if they redacted the language without the permission of the rights holder. That is not the case. The rights holder is very much on board here - presumably because they know that the language is old-fashioned at best and OFFENSIVE at worst, and they just signed a many-million dollar contract with Netflix! And I'm sure they would like people to NOT boycott those Netflix projects and continue to buy the books!

It would also be censorship if somebody rounded up all old copies and destroyed them, preventing people from ever experiencing the text as originally published. But that's not happening. There are literally MILLIONS of copies of these books in print. They are SO available we could all build houses out of them. Nobody is taking anything away here.

Additionally -- this happens ALL THE TIME. All! The! Time!!!! Mind you -- MOST books just go out of print and are forgotten. But books that are lucky enough to stay in print for decades are often updated / tweaked to reflect changing cultural mores, etc.

For examples: In the 1930's, Nancy Drew was 16 years old and carried a gun. In the 1950's, they realized that was not going over well anymore, so they changed all her stories to make her 18 with no gun.

In the 1970's, Margaret of ARE YOU THERE GOD fame wore a "sanitary belt" for her period. I read these books in the early 80's and was like "wtf???" -- well, in the late 80s, they changed it to pads.

Oh, and also, in early editions of CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY, the Oompa-Loompas were Black pygmies from a tribe in Africa! They changed them to orange fantasy creatures later, because guess what, people were weirded out about it.

While it's true that Roald D himself made/approved that change (presumably because somebody back in the day told him, "yo, you are going to get a LOT of money from Hollywood if you make this change" and he realized it was true) -- he's dead. If he were alive, he'd probably have the same convo, and people would say "yo, Netflix is giving you millions of dollars, apologize for the hatred you spewed and change some words or your deal is toast." -- And he'd have done it, just like he did the first time. Since he's dead, his heirs made that decision. Which they are fully allowed to do.

Most of the time, literary executors of author's estates are trying to do the most lucrative things for that estate; they have a fiduciary responsibility to do so. That being said - if you feel strongly that after your death your books must be frozen in amber and never changed a bit, never sold to Hollywood / adapted for stage or TV or film, never sold into foreign countries where words change in translation all the time -- then let your heirs / executors know that explicitly, they DO NOT have permission to agree to any of this. And the books will likely just go out of print, and sink into oblivion.

ETA: Are these changes really being done because of concern for children's "delicate" brains, or "cancel culture gone mad"? ... OR, is it a somewhat cynical cash-grab to ensure that a multi-million dollar Netflix deal doesn't go down the tubes? Probably the latter!

But also, that isn't censorship. Creators and their estates are allowed to grab cash if it is offered, and can change or not change things as they will. They are the rights holders.

ETA ETA: I also should have mentioned a similar case from a couple years back: In 2021, the Seuss estate elected to *stop* publishing certain titles that contained racial and ethnic stereotypes. (And also - those particular books were among his least popular and they were not losing anything by making that decision, they make a billion dollars off his other books, and actually that news made his books SKYROCKET in sales, but whatever). It would not surprise me AT ALL if this hand-wringing news actually causes a big spike in Dahl sales.

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choicesfandomappreciation · 1 year

Text

You are amazing and you matter. No matter how your day is going, I hope you never forget that you are enough just as you are (you always have been and always will be).

We all struggle from time to time, and it's okay. We're only human. Sometimes we feel comfortable reaching out, sometimes we just need a little encouragement. I hope you find something on this page to make you smile, bring you motivation, or just remind you that you will be okay.

Need more support? Find a help number in your country. [Here]

Got a word of encouragement, self-care ideas, helpful websites or resources you think should be added? Just send them my way and I'll get them up.

This page is currently under development and more will be added as soon as possible.

You can do it. Even when you doubt yourself. Even when things feel overwhelming. Pause and breathe. Remember how far you've come. You are so very capable. You will get through this.

It's okay to make mistakes. It's okay to feel overwhelmed. It's okay to struggle. It's okay not to know what comes next. It's okay to say no. It's okay to stand up for yourself and what you believe. It's okay to choose what is right for you even when others don't understand. It's okay. You will be okay.

Take a moment to focus on all that you are instead of all you aren't because you are amazing just as you are. You have nothing to prove to anyone.

A bad day doesn't mean it's a bad life. I know that can be hard to believe, especially when that bad day turns into a bad week, month, or even year. Please know how strong you are. I see you. I see your struggle. You are not alone. You've survived all those bad days. Your good days will come. Until then, have hope, reach out to a friend. You will get through this.

You don't have to do everything at once, baby steps still take you forward.

There's no need to apologize for making yourself a priority. You should always put yourself first. Do what you have to do for yourself

It's okay to be sad. It's okay to be confused. It's okay to not know your next step. Just keep going. You'll figure it out. (source)

By opening up bit by bit and around someone you trust, you can learn to show the world how amazing your true self is. (source)

You are still okay and loved if: you like to spend time with yourself, you don't have a lot of close friends, you have frequent panic or anxiety attacks, you cry at random times, you need to take naps, you feel sad or empty, you feel lonely, you have a mental illness. (source)

Don't push yourself too hard. It's okay if you can't do it. It's okay if you can't finish it. It's okay if you need help. It's okay if you need to take a break. It's okay if you need to just try again tomorrow. It's okay if you can't do it as well as someone else. It's okay if you do it more slowly than someone else. Everyone has their own limits. It's okay. (source)

Encouragement for Writers + Creators:

Your stories are valid, regardless of the notes, of how many people read it. The time you spent planning, writing and editing wasn't a waste if (re)reading makes you happy.

It's okay not be productive everyday. The low phases of your creative cycle don't mean your ability isn't real and won't go away. It's simply dormant. Be gentle with yourself and soon it'll flourish again.

"You might not write well every day, but you can always edit a bad page. You can't edit a blank page" ~Jodi Picoult

If you feel stuck, you're allowed to take a step back and do something else. There's no shame about taking a break.

Allow yourself to be proud of and love your writing. There is nothing cool about self-deprecation. Being proud doesn't make you bad. It doesn't make you vain. It doesn't make you selfish. It doesn't make you self-centered. It doesn't make you think you're superior. It just means you recognize your own effort and appreciate the effort that you put in, just like you do with others. What makes you think that just because you made it, you don't deserve the same respect, love and appreciation you give to other writers? You don't have to search for that validation in others. You're allowed to give it to yourself. (source)

On particularly tough days, when you're sure you can't possibly endure, remember your track record for getting through bad days is 100% and that's pretty good!

The road to success is never straight.

Believe in unknown miracles already on their way to you.

When you meet resistance, you are growing in the right direction.

Find More Encouragement Quotes:

#SpreadJoy Quotes with Choices Characters

Take a step outside. Go to a forest, a park or to the beach. No goal in mind, just get some air and enjoy the moment. Maybe explore somewhere you haven't been yet.

Do something new. Maybe something you have wanted to try for a while. Be it crafts, different activities, baking/cooking, or even just watching a new show.

Spend 10 minutes writing down words that make you smile, make you dream or just make you feel good.

Organize your space

Create an "it's done" list to celebrate all you accomplish (nothing is too small)

Take a social media break (don't compare yourself to others and their "lives")

Daily Accomplishment Bingo Board (click to view)

988: Crisis Hotline (call or text or visit website to chat, 24/7)

A Soft Murmur : Mix and combine ambient sounds that fit you and your mood (rain, thunder, waves, wind, fire, birds)

Emergency Compliment: Need a compliment? Enjoy these hilariously random and entertaining compliments

Happify: Science based activities and games to reduce stress and build confidence

Pixel Thoughts: Write what's troubling you an a star and watch it shrink into the distance over a 60 second relaxation period

Pop Bubble Wrap: Pop one bubble and four more appear!

QuietKit: Guided Meditation for beginners

Rainy Mood: Listen to ambient rain sounds (then open a live feed of a cozy fire on Youtube) and relax.

Scream Into the Void : Type anything you want to say or get out of your head and then send it into the void. (actual screaming sound effect include)

The Oregon Trail: Head back in time with this vintage game

The Quiet Place Project: Take a few seconds out of your day to sit, relax, and breathe.

This is Sand : Create your own virtual sand art

Tone Matrix: Make your own music with these pleasant sounding bells

Weave Silk: An online tool for creating symmetrical art, including rotational symmetry.

Xhlr: guided breathing where you can adjust the length of each part of the process (inhale, hold, exhale, hold)

Atmosphere: relaxing sounds (free)

Finch: adopt a self-care pet and work on day-to-day goals, track your mood, journal, complete breathing activities, and more (Free and Paid versions available)

Get Color: liquid sort puzzle (free)

Pixel Art: paint by numbers (free)

Puzzle Art: jigsaw art puzzles (free)

Smiling Minds: guided meditation (free)

Zen Color: color by numbers (free)

Books

Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl

The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook by Matthew McKay

Music

Walk On by U2

Blogs

@chibird

@positiveseed

Pinterest: Mental Mastery

@lovealexhunt , @lorirwritesfanfic , @princess-geek, @aallotarenunelma, @jerzwriter , @peonierose

Got a word of encouragement, self-care ideas, helpful websites or resources you think should be added? Just send them my way and I'll get them up.

(some are repeated in the two images, but some are unique so I included both)

Need support? Find a help number in your country. [Here]

#choices #playchoices #choices game #choices fandom appreciation #self care #self care ideas #encouragement #words of encouragement #websites to distract you #websites to cheer you up #things to do when you're bored #self-care #motivation #encouraging words

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raayllum · 6 months

Note

1 - favorite fic you wrote this year. 3 - favorite line/scene you wrote this year. 12 - favorite character to write about this year. 14 - a fic you didn’t expect to write. 21 - most memorable comment/review. And 24 - favorite fic you read this year.

I have no precision on fandom or fic... You are free to choose which fandom. Thus, you may make us discover other universes.

1) favourite fic you wrote this year

Looked through and discovered that I wrote 20 fics this year, which is wild, even if the majority are oneshots so... certainly have my pick an picks for various reasons!

These are the ones, probably:

This Fall Might Just Kill Me is 10.2k of Callum trying and failing to get purified, post-S4, and was one of my favourites and one I return to pretty often for a personal re-read. Very Callum/Rayla centric, some magic worldbuilding, and lots of devotion. Oneshot

Twice as Many Stars is 8.7k of Sir Sparklepuff is an existential horror story, the fic, featuring more religious trauma allegory than expected. Also a oneshot

Teach Me How to Name the Bigger Light a fanon s6 currently of 5 out of roughly 26-30ish chapters, and at 41k and counting. Main characters are Callum, Ezran, Rayla, and Claudia in about that order. It's a lot of fun, and a lot of angst

3) favourite line/scene this year

"If it's not you, it's not anyone" has one of my favourite love / Rayllum confessions I've ever written. I also loved this line from a (now non canon) fic regarding Kpp'Ar's feelings on Callum/people "There are many ways to mend broken things, if you can". I deeply enjoyed Callum threatening Nyx over Rayla's safety in this pre-S5 fic and this piece of description as well: "Callum knelt down in front of her, her cheeks heating as he reached up and pried the shawl away again, looking at the way the scar crept over her shoulder like dark ivy" + this Rayllum passage from "this fall just might kill me" (edit in the link):

“It’s because if I die,” he said, squeezing her hands. “I want you to be the last thing I ever see. And you are good enough, Rayla. You are . I don’t care if you destroy me. I don't care if we make each other better or worse or both. I love you. I’ll fall for you every time. I’ll choose to, I’ll choose you, every time.”

I also really enjoyed writing Callum and Lujanne in "older but just never wiser" because it was interesting to revisit their dynamic now that well, Callum is older, powerful, and much more jaded/angry.

Drabbles wise this Rayllum one has one of my favourite metaphoric uses I've ever been able to pull off and I always love 1) writing messy Ezran and 2) Ezran being a little done with his brother's less than favourable methods, so this one for Ezran's "underhanded" comment for sure

But if I had to pick a singular exchange fic wise, it is of course the end of the Callum and Ezran fight from Ch4 of fanon s6, because it was a line that hurt me so much I was sad the rest of the day, and I also thought of it before writing a decent chunk of the boys' argument, so making sure it felt earned and hit the way I wanted to was very fun if also angsty. I apologize in advance lmao:

Only this time Callum scoffed, peeling away, his green eyes glinting. “Yeah, right.” “I am your king and I forbid you—” “You don’t get to forbid me from doing anything because guess what?” A manic gleam overtook his brother’s face. “I don’t fucking care what you think, nevermind what you fucking decree. I’m freeing Runaan, and that’s final.” “Then you can do it without my help,” Ezran said with a ragged breath. “Because I am not giving you my seal.” Callum stared at him with cold eyes. “Dad would be so disappointed in you.” But this time Ezran was ready for the blow, as he said, “Well at least I called him Dad."

A shameless plug OG fantasy world wise was definitely this lines from my sequel WIP. You can learn more about it/the fantasy world here <3

The Alpha of the Crescents may have worn her old friend’s face and mannerisms, but the girls they’d both been were long dead, just like their families. It was time to finish the job and bury them.

as well as

“Good. Vita willing I won’t live to see your next lives.” “Because seeing you again has been so pleasant,” Jamie muttered.

from book one

12) favourite character to write about this year

Given my above answers it's clearly been Callum, but Ezran has probably been my standout in "teach me how to name the bigger light," easy, even if I think Rayla's POV is going to sneak up on me more and more as the fic goes on, especially once we reach the chapters at the Starscraper. I've also written a somewhat decent amount of Kpp'Ar POV this year, I loved writing Claudia in "twice as many stars" in particular. Everyone? Can I say everyone?

But if I had to pick, Callum. (Non fic wise it's all the OG chosen one kiddos running around, I love 'em.)

14) a fic you didn't expect to write

Many days of angry muttering and half concocted plot points predated "teach me how to name the bigger light" and I am still slightly internally salty about it. However, it does feel good to have one last fanon season foray, especially since it's been four years since the last one, and I've been having a fucking blast, lemme tell you.

21) most memorable comment/review

This is hard because I do cherish every review and kind word I get (as well as anyone who leaves notes in their bookmarks) but there are some standouts. Basically anything from twice as many stars is fair game as well as this review on fanon s6, cause I'm gonna go the typical write route and say the long bois make my day / when readers catch onto the smaller details, that's absolutely my favourite:

@inamindfarfaraway <3 hope you've enjoyed the most recent chapter!

24) favourite fic you read this year

Have already done some TDP fic recs here so I'm gonna focus on what's in my bookmarks for now! I mostly read LOZ or SOC fics when I'm not making my way through TDP backlog, but this one for Six of Crows centreing on Inej and Kaz called High Wire Act stood out to me and I'm really enjoying "for the children we couldn't be" for TDP because it's trio centric and the exact kind of time travel fuckery I like to read.

This is tricky, though, cause I find most often the favourite things I participate in is like, the stuff I write because it's what I want to read and most tailored to my specific tastes? I also just don't read as much fic as I could / have in the past and it's hard to pick Just One Fic, y'know? So cop out answer, maybe, but this is the one!

#thanks for asking #forbidden op lore #a year in review lmao #perlelas #my fic #dragons rambles

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etherealising · 9 months

Note

sweetheart. this isn’t gonna be the nicest message and I do not intend for this to come off as being a hater; but as a fellow author, I felt this obligation to voice what I’ve seen that might be considered “cringe”.

i was highly, highly, HIGHLY invested in your Carmy Berzatto “all i ever knew, only you” series, but frustratingly lost complete interest by your erratic postings and timeline. like having “interludes” instead of just chapters? it’s outstandingly confusing. if you want to write a flashback, just do it with confidence, but your organization of your fic is frustrating to read. you’re not a terrible writer, on the contrary - I think you’re very good. like VERY good.

however, you lose yourself in an avalanche of details. you try W A Y too hard to foreshadow and allude to certain details, but you just confuse yourself and end up “putting your foot in your mouth”.

author to author, it helps TEN FOLD to pause and reread; to reedit. fuck a publishing timeline, fuck the followers that pressure you into posting, just make sure your story makes sense in a chronological order - cause the story’s whiplash was a turn off.

and I know, I know, what’s one reader to a plethora of others? i just felt the obligation to say that while it has the potential to be a GREAT story (that you keep incredibly expanding and deepening), it is wildly confusing in terms of your “timeline”.

my best wishes, support, and eagerness to see what else you might publish! and my apologies if I came off too harsh or rude - I’d simply love to see fellow authors expand on their craft!

not angry just dejected, take this response how you want i do not care : )

please do not refer to me as sweetheart. no matter how many times you explain that this isn’t a bash or negative feedback, calling me ‘sweetheart’ implies that you’re being condescending : )

first off [aiekoy] was not supposed to be a full fledged chaptered fic, so please writing gods forgive me for the utmost heinous act of writing and figuring things out as i go.

i can understand your “critique”, but you failed to explain how duel timeline in a story is “cringe” … i’m confused??

i’m sure you’ve read a mainstream book with the duel timeline trope, that’s exactly what this is. you’re implication that i’m cringy and not confident is such a fuck you to me because regardless of your intentions with this message it’s not coming across the way you intended.

my interludes are not a “confidence” thing, if I didn’t have confidence this fic wouldn’t have seen the light of day : )

imagine telling someone writing FOR FREE that their idea is “cringy” and a “confidence” issue??? i’m sure you can understand why i might come across a bit annoyed : )

i don’t try way too hard to fucking do anything, i just WRITE. i would honestly love to see where i “put my foot in my mouth” because i genuinely don’t see it. and that’s fine because it’s my writing and i’m constantly going over this shit ALONE so of course i’m not gonna catch every little detail that make people tick.

i am not getting paid to write this story. i am not getting paid to edit this story. i am writing this story because i had an idea and felt like sharing it because why fucking not. fan fiction does not and will not always be the best piece of literature/fiction you have ever interacted with and thats okay.

if you have fuck all time to edit, re-edit, draft, re-draft, and have a beta editor then i applaud you. but i have responsibilities outside of fanfiction so if something isn’t up to YOUR standards it’s not MY highest priority.

you also say “fuck a publishing timeline, fuck the followers that pressure you into posting,” but in the same breath explain that YOU quit reading because of my “erratic postings” and timeline. maybe i’m just not understanding it but it comes across a bit contradictory.

please understand that if my timeline is confusing, it’s because the bear’s canon timeline is confusing and contradictory as fuck. i’m literally doing somebody else’s job by trying to make this timeline make fucking sense.

don’t know who bestowed upon you this “obligation” you speak of but it was not i sis : )

to whoever this anon is i hope you can understand my defensiveness as i DID NOT ASK for this critique and obviously i’m going to be defensive this is MY work. and please if my response rubs you the wrong way please do not chime back into my inbox yapping off at the mouth that i’m a “bitch who can’t take critiques”

because i actually can but your critiques are UNSOLICITED for one and it just came across extremely pretentious (at least it read that way to me).

i probably would’ve had a much better reaction to your “help” if you had given me examples and explained a bit better your point of view, but you didn’t so i don’t, sucks to suck : (

have a great rest of your day, hope your journey as a writer continues going swell : )

#this is the exact reason i didn’t want to post on this hellsite #besties please this is FREE fucking fan fiction #i am not a paid author #stop fucking expecting perfection from overworked #over tired college students #who are just trying to provide escapism #[aiekoy] asks #vee answers °•. ✿ .•°#all i ever knew only you ₊‧°𐐪♡𐑂°‧₊

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coldheartsbreakboys · 1 year

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ill start this by saying i understand @its-actually-minicika said the matter with @blackdreamspeaks is over and done but i literally cant let go of some things she said.

((also english is my second language so im sorry if i make mistakes 🤡 i will put this under the cut but i really think people should read this))

here is the problem. she said that she, takes the blame for what happened but she posts this after not even a full day of calling out that she did something wrong

there are no multiple sides to this story girl like none at all. it is literally the fact that you took content from mini/mina without credit and after you apologised you didnt even own it uppp. you said it was a coincidence and that you maybe took inspiration from her from the unconcious which is such a dumb excuse.

yesterday i sent you an ask with screenshots of compared writing from mini that she posted 2 months ago and stuff you posted 2 days ago. and it was clear you took the sentence from her without even an edit. you also used the same insult she used with hw aemond for your aemond. which is again really shitty and so clear because only she uses it.

i didnt compare everything you wrote in your update to hw because it is very long and i think that even those two things are enough to prove this point. it is not fair that you took from mini but then not even apologise in truth. you cant say this was a coincidence. you cant say this isnt done with intent. she is a very nice person and she deserves a real apology where you actually say that, yes you copied from her but that you re very sorry.

i waited for you to at least answer my ask if you were actually sorry and assuming your blame. because i wanted to give you the benefit of doubt and let you prepare your answer. sadly you never replied but i still have the screenshots even after your edit.

so this one is yours.

and this one is from minis series.

there was also the insult as i said but i didnt take screenshots of it before you edited. but the insult was 'whithered cunt' which mini wrote in the first part of hw and that was a long time ago.

you guys can cancel me if you want and whatever i honestly dont care because i am a small blog and i tbh dont even post. threaten to doxx or send me mean dms I fr dont careee

this is a post that i made for both mini and me because she deserves a real apology and you didnt give her that and also because i am honestly very angry. i think most people also dont know what happened because you never released the screenshots in my ask and you never actually said what you took from mini. because yes!!! you took from mini. there are no sides to this. there is the right side and that is mini. you play the victim too much and that is not okay. you are 21 and you should know better.

i end this by saying i understand you talked to mini and you say she is okay with everything now. she didnt say anything to any of her followers to do. she actually told me and someone else to not bother anymore with this drama. but i am bothered. and you are very frustrating. what you did is not okay at all

so girl bffr and take the blame. it isnt that hard. i might be back to edit this or to add stuff i think is important but these are the most important things that i can think of right now. i will post with the tags for hotd because people need to see this and i don't have many followers.

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solarishashernoseinabook · 2 months

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Okay. So. Long not-an-ask ask. Apologies. Might seem creepy(?) Weird(?) Unasked for(?) Trauma dumpy(?)No clue if this fits within normal social norms, but I had to go and tell you this, because I -need- you to know that you have meant the world to me and I feel like no thanks I could give you could ever be enough.

I'm sure you are aware by now that I am -quite- the fan of trr (solaris edition).

For the past 8 years of intense social issues, panick attacks and a whole other array of struggles, I have spent 7 of those thinking I might be autistic. I never dared do anything with it, part of a whole other trauma unrelated to this, but had the same struggles none the less. I tried not to research too much into autism, as I was deadly afraid of 'conforming to the diagnosis' because I was desperate to know why my life had crumbled the way it had.

For 7 years, I knew something was wrong, but could not, dared not, to get the help I needed.

March 14 I read your trr for the first time.

March 15 I had the biggest breakdown I had in a while, crying and crying reading 'Halt does research' where I read Halts flashback, and saw myself in my youth in a way I had never before.

I can't find the exact chapter/date for this one, but there were some bits where Crowley was kind and considerate and patient with Halt, and I cried and cried again. Knowing this is how I wanted to be treated, and what impact it would've had on my growing up if this had been given to me.

The first time around trr -wrecked- me, nor only on a story level, but on a deep and personal level. It made me see things I already suspected, knew, even, but pushed deep down out of an immeasurable fear of what it would mean.

I re-read trr 3-4 times (sometimes without comment spamming) between march 14 and october 8th.

October 8th I had my intake conversation at a diagnostic centre.

The strength and healing I pulled from your trr got me in that room. Your trr showed me who I had been, seeing me in a way that no story had ever seen me, and showing me what could be, too. The way I deserve to be treated and loved in a much more concrete manner than anything ever could.

Now, poetically enough, march again, the 17th, I got diagnosed. Autistic, with a higher need in social stuff and task-doing. I was just as I -should- be. Not broken, not imperfect, just wired differently. Due to planning issues, I have not yet received my official report, all I had this past week was a single stressfull conversation and my brain trying to convince me I heard it all wrong. (I did not)

I am so used to keeping myself together with glue and smiles, that I have not yet been able to process the impact of what this means. Not fully, at least.

But in march I read your trr. And I saw your Halt. And I saw me. And I cried in mourning and desperation. And in march, I read your Crowley, and I saw my options, my truth and what could be.

I spend so many words writing this (I am so sorry) and yet they don't feel enough. You have given me something I never could on my own, and I could never express to you what that means. I just. I needed you to know the impact you have had. The help I will now get because you chose to write a grumpy guy in a way that mattered.

Thank you. With every fiber of my being. Thank you.

Well, first things first: Congratulations are in order! Maybe you don't have the paper yet, but you're one of us - officially! Get a warm drink, a favourite treat, and have a you night with your cat

But on a more personal note: this ask also means a lot to me for reasons that would be extremely rambly if I explained them in full. I'm gonna try anyway.

I first started to suspect I was autistic when I was fifteen. I began to seriously suspect it, and make accommodations for myself as if I was autistic, when I was twenty-eight. I had a friend with ADHD whose brother had ADHD and autism, and through conversations with her about what her brother was like (I knew her through school, and hadn't met her brother in person), I grew more confident about being autistic...but still not fully confident. See, the way my 'tism works, I don't like to consider myself as anything unless I have incontrovertible proof of it. I was leery about eye contact, stimmed regularly, had to think about my facial expressions and tone of voice constantly, related to autistic people, hated too much sensory stimulation...but I didn't have proof. Feel free to laugh at me - I tease myself about this as well

Fast forward two years. I'm just preparing to publish the first chapter of The Royal Ranger. I'm nervous about it. I'd had the thought to make Halt autistic in it, but, well, I didn't have proof that I was autistic yet, did I? And I didn't have an autistic beta reader on the fic. So I gave myself an out. I clarified in the author's note that it was based on my own experience and not meant to be universal. I paid careful attention to how I felt so I could write Halt feeling the same way. Even in later chapters, when it came time to say what Halt saw when looking at people's faces, I had Caitlyn say it and framed it as a years-old conversation she was remembering. That way, if i was wrong, I had a cover

Things started to change before that though, on May 1st, 2022, when Angel made a post here on tumblr praising TRR. Having another autistic person openly say they related to Halt and loved his portrayal went a long way towards settling my mind. Angel started beta reading TRR, and when he never accused me of doing something completely wrong and off base, my mind settled further. I got better about saying I was autistic. And then other autistic people commented saying they related to Halt and saw themselves in him, and I realised that writing an allistic character was a lot harder than writing an autistic one because, oh yeah, they actually pick up on emotions, and all together the scales have tipped and we've hit my brain's standard of "incontrovertible proof"

So thank you for sending this in, and thanks for reading, and thanks for all the comments! I look forward to reread number six (I think we're on six now?) 😊

#thanks bestie this is gonna live rent free in my head from now on #asks #the royal ranger #trr fanfic #my writing

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27dragons · 1 year

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Since I'm trying to get back into the second draft of the Safe Harbor sequel, I'm going to take you at your word and ask about the Sandbridge series. Do you have a favourite moment from the series? And are there anything you can tell us about that happened but we didn't see onscreen? ❤️❤️❤️

First, let me say that I am utterly delighted that you're continuing the Safe Harber story; I loved it so much!

Favorite moment? Oh, holy heck, that's a difficult one. I'll just stream-of-consciousness a handful of them, shall I? :D

Tony and Bucky's dance and first kiss in Safe and (the) Sound, the one that gets interrupted by the fire. I'm a little weird about sex scenes; they're really intense for me the first time I write (or read) them but they lose most of their punch on subsequent re-reads. But that kiss never fails to make my heart beat a little faster.

In Lord of the Swings, Bucky standing in line for beer and dealing with a bunch of homophobic asshats. Tisfan wrote that scene pretty much in its entirety (I only edited it) and it is for me a perfect encapsulation of how queer people experience that sort of aggression.

In Howard's End, the moment where Tony thinks Howard is actually going to apologize, but then realizes that Howard still doesn't get it, and his line there: "You regret driving me away because of what I might have become. It still doesn't occur to you to regret hurting me because I was a child." This is the heartbreak at the core of Tony and Howard - that Howard can never really see Tony as anything but his heir, even when they're on good terms.

The bachelor parties in Zen and the Art of Family Maintenance. Because they're so delightful and absolutely perfect for them both.

The scene in From the Ukraine with Love where Steve gets a call from Bucky and has to go collect his sad drunk ass. That's the beating heart of their friendship, right there. Also, Natasha fretting over her sundress when Steve introduces her to Winifred is utterly adorable, because we don't get many chances to see Natasha as anything but supremely self-confident.

Tony dealing with Billie's tantrums in High Noon in Sandbridge, because so many kidfics have the new parents struggling comically or barely struggling at all, and Tony starts out as, frankly, a really TERRIBLE parent. He has NO idea what he's doing, and it shows very clearly in those scenes.

In That Someone Special, I have 2 moments: When Scott first shows up and Steve is chasing him to try to punch him and Tony steps between them until he finds out exactly who Scott is, and then steps back and says "oh, carry on" -- that was, to me, a perfect moment of almost gallows humor. And then the turnaround scene, when Tony, Steve, and Sam show up at Luis' apartment to help Scott after he's been beaten up. That scene is a special kind of funny and touching.

In My Three Dads, the scene where Billie is in the hospital with a broken leg. Loki being jealous over Tony's rapport with Billie and then proud that she picks him to stay with her for the x-rays; and Bucky stepping in to make Tony leave when he can't handle seeing Billie in pain. Family dynamics at their best. <3

And finally, in Stem the Tide, which is not technically a Sandbridge 'verse story at all, but a "What If" side novel, I really like the scene where Bucky stands up to Alex and tells him to fuck off.

Stuff that happens that you didn't see onscreen... I have a couple of chapters that we cut out of My Three Dads, including Tony meeting with Grant Ward that we rejected because it steered the plot wrong, and one with Tony and Bucky going to Ty's apartment to pick up his stuff, which we allude to and consider as having actually happened, but didn't include because it screwed up our pacing for the story. I actually sometimes forget that we never posted the scene at Ty's apartment, because I really liked it. I might someday clean it up and throw it into the Jetsam and Flotsam bits-and-pieces collection.

But if there's something specific you were wondering about in the background, feel free to shoot me a DM and ask; I'm always happy to talk about my Sandbridge boys. <3

#backchat #weethreequarter #sandbridge #winteriron #pique queue

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deepspacedukat · 9 months

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Coitarche

I wish to issue a very sincere apology. I know that I had Elnor (ST:PIC) listed for this prompt, but I have been trying for several days, and I just can't seem to capture his voice. (Usually my fics are late because I'm rly bad at time management, but today, it's because he is Incredibly Difficult™ for me to write.) I know there are often small typos in my works despite my attempts to edit them out, but typos are one thing. Low-quality, shitty work is another beast entirely. I always go back and re-edit my works for typos/quick fixes, but I cannot in good conscience allow myself to put out work that makes me cringe as much as my attempts at writing Elnor have. I want to do right by you all, and as it stands currently, I refuse to curse your eyes with my horrendous failed attempts.

That being said: today's fic will feature my Romulan OC, Major Denak (mentioned in "Praetor's Pride" chapter 3). This fic is a side commentary to "Praetor's Pride," but you don't need to have read that first to understand this little drabble. I will, once I have had more time to find Elnor's voice in my writing, release a sort of "make-up fic" about him. I don't like not being able to deliver on something when I've given my word that I will. It probably won't come out until after the SoC challenge is over, but Elnor fans, I will learn your man's voice if I have to listen to clips of him for hours on end!

For anyone who is curious, "coitarche" is defined here. Anyway, enjoy!

Day 29: Loss Of Virginity

SoC prompt list here. SoC Masterlist here. Cross-posted to AO3 here.

~*~

Denak (OC) x Unnamed Romulan OFC, mention of Hiren (ST:Nemesis) x Reader (from "Praetor's Pride")

[A/N: This is smut, so 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI!!!]

Warnings: Mild angst, lost love, arranged marriages, sexual memories, sexual dreams, loss of virginity, mention of masturbation, woman on top, biting.

(Picrew used to make ^this^ can be found here.)

~*~

"Why are you alone after all this time, Major Denak?" The calm, curious voice of Praetor Hiren called out from the balcony railing, and the man in question lifted an eyebrow.

"Sir?" Denak was far from the only guard on duty tonight, but when the Praetor took his nightly walk around the grounds, he preferred that he only have one guard with him. The palace was safe enough, he claimed, and he didn't enjoy feeling as though he was a child who required a large escort even in his own home.

"I have seen many of my guards with their partners, or I've at minimum heard them discussing their various conquests, but you..." Hiren trailed off, pausing as he turned to face the youngest member of his Rei’karansu. "Have you no romantic prospects?"

Denak knew precisely why Hiren was so curious. The pretty Federation Ambassador whom the Praetor had been chatting with tonight had put him in a good mood - a better one than he'd been in since his official appointment.

"None at present, my lord Praetor." The older man seemed disappointed, so, not wishing to sour his mood, Denak allowed a memory to tug at him. "However, there was someone several years ago."

The guard noted a small smile upon the other man's lips, and he continued.

"She was the first woman I ever truly loved. I dare not reveal her identity, though. She is a nobleman's wife, now, and I doubt she would appreciate her name being associated with that of a mere guard," he murmured taking a few steps closer to the Praetor's position and gazing out across the palace gardens. "She was sweet...just as inexperienced and nervous as I was."

Denak could recall every moment he'd spent with her in perfect detail. She'd been carved into his heart as deeply as only a first love ever could. They'd both been so overcome by their passions that despite the awkwardness that was invariably present in a first sexual encounter, both Denak and his lover had overcome their nerves and enjoyed themselves immensely.

"Ah, young love. There is nothing else quite like it in this universe," Hiren muttered as he leaned against the railing. "Were you together long?"

The Major let out a quiet, wistful sigh.

"Five years. Longer than I deserved, but...not nearly long enough," he stated, trying not to sound too much like he was pouting. "Her family arranged her betrothal, and she was forced to break off our relationship. From what I understand, her husband treats her well, but...I can't help but wonder what might have happened if...well..."

He couldn't put into words the thoughts he'd mulled over so often in the dark solitude of his empty bed over the years.

What if she'd chosen to ignore her family's wishes? What if she'd chosen him instead? What if Denak had been her husband instead of that stuffy dignitary?

He knew it was no use dwelling on hypothetical situations, but he still had moments where he couldn't control that nagging little voice in his head.

As the years passed, his feelings for her had dimmed, as was expected, but there were still lonely nights in which his dreams featured the ghost of her lips on his neck and awoke with the sensation of her fingers gripping his shoulders as she rode him. He'd take his length in hand and allow the memories to burn through him until he spilled over his stomach.

Denak still remembered the adoration in her eyes when he brought her to orgasm for the first time. She'd been his first in every respect, just as he had been hers. Elements, she was the reason he knew he enjoyed having his ears bitten!

"I have been with others since her, but none to whom I've formed a serious connection," the Major said, and Hiren nodded his head.

"I know what you mean. I've had a few encounters since my wife passed, but all of them were casual. We all need release, but...being open with someone...being truly committed after a love like that...it's difficult," the Praetor commiserated before turning to look at his guard. "I suppose we're both waiting for the one who will pick up the pieces, aren't we?"

"Yes, my lord Praetor," Denak replied dutifully, but given the sparkle in the older man's eyes, he suspected that one of them had already found what he was looking for.

~*~*~

Taglist:

@akamitrani @android-boyfriends @attention-bajoranworkers @bigblissandlove1 @darkmattervibes @emilie786 @horta-in-charge @live-logs-and-proper @slutty-slutty-vulcans @starrynightgardens @toebeans-mcgee

#deepspacedukat fic #Major Denak x Romulan!Reader #Major Denak x Reader

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nikethestatue · 2 years

Note

I’m apologizing in advance because this a long one, but once I get going sometimes I just don’t know how to stop 😅

I’m a new follower of yours and for awhile was just a casual ACOTAR reader. After a recent re-read I decided to jump into the online fandom and *wowzers* was I surprised to discover the massive shipwars happening. Being a casual reader like many, (and not having seen nor even possessing the knowledge of the Azriel bonus chapter) I was always under the impression the next couple to be was Elriel. After seeing all the hullabaloo and noise regarding Gwynriel, I was confused and sought out the BC. Here is what I would like to contribute to the conversation after reading it…

First let me explain what I do for a living and how it applies to my thought process. I produce unscripted television episodes - my official title is Story Producer. I work in post production and am responsible for assembling and tracking the story for my designated episodes. Now, obviously television and books are wildly different mediums, however, the art of storytelling is universal and as a professional storyteller I’m banking all my chips on Elriel. Their ship has been seeded many times throughout the earlier books and I do not believe that the addition of the Gwyn character is going to change that rather than merely shake things up. I see a lot of Gwynriel supporters screaming why would SJM even have the interaction with Gwyn and Az if it wasn’t important… I think the answer to that is simple - It’s classic misdirection. Even though it’s a chapter that clearly not everyone is even aware of and takes place middle of the book’s timeline, I believe it’s ultimately meant to be treated as a cliffhanger. And what storytelling device is often used in cliffhangers??… misdirection. A tactic we employ often in the shows I work on. Even the wording surrounding the dancing shadows and the glowing necklace image seems very deliberately misleading and can be interpreted in multiple ways - which we have already seen from all of the ship camps (I myself am a supporter of the Gwyn lightsinger theory).

Given the types of meetings I experience at my job discussing character arcs, relationships, likability, audience perception, etc., I think it’s possible that similar conversations happened with SJM and her editing/publishing teams regarding Elain’s book. (Yes! I, too, believe her book is next!!!) And based on what I’ve seen to be a large portion of the fandom’s negative and grossly misogynistic attitude towards Elain, it’s possible they felt the need to drum up more interest for sales. Personally, I don’t think you need more interest than having Rhys outright command Az to stay away. I know what non-Elriels are squawking about enemies to lovers reigning supreme or whatever, but to me a forbidden romance (along with a broken or rejected mate bond) sounds soooo deliciously refreshing… but maybe the publishers were worried it might not have been enough to convince Elain nay-sayers to tune in next time, cue the Gwyn/Az cliffhanger.

I am by no means stating that everyone should listen to me because my profession dictates that I am 100% right in this (I’m just a storyteller of a different kind waiting on pins and needles for Sep 8th just like everyone else!!). I’m merely chiming in on the discussion from my perspective. And despite some very vocal Gwynriels deeming Elriel a “sinking ship”, I truly don’t believe SJM seeded said ship for three books only to change her mind before it even comes to fruition. That would be some very strange and bad storytelling. And no - Tamlin, Chaol, etc. isn’t the same thing. Those weren’t just multiple books of only build up, so that is a useless argument. And I definitely don’t believe she set up Azriel to “only want sex from Elain” after all this time. That obviously wouldn’t make him very likable and I highly doubt that is the goal for one of her beloved batboy creations, especially after making us wait all these years for insight into his character.

I have several other thoughts about the delusion of Elucians and Elain “not looking good in black” theories, but I’ll stop here haha. Sorry for rattling your ear off 😂 I’m just such a fan of your blog and wanted to share my two cents while we all eagerly await the *hopefully* upcoming news!!!

No, rant away, because this is actually perfect!

Because that's what we've been saying for years! It IS misdirection and somewhat of a lame attempt at an additional conflict and a cliffhanger.

Because if SJM wants to make this book spicier in terms of 'choice' it's nice to have people wonder, since a choice between just between 3 people isnt always all that interesting. But if there is another figure seemingly in the mix, it would seem like something else is going on.

It's kind of like Rhys expressing shock in ACOTAR and just disappearing. I don't think this is at the same level obviously, but it also makes people pause and wonder.

And no, she will not have an unresolved romance which she'd been building up for years just not happen. That's ridiculous.

it's the same thing as with Elrocan in TOG. They were built up over a course of many books. They were the background love affair, and they didn't consummate until the final book. Now imagine, when suddenly.........nothing happened. Elide met someone else and walked away from Lorcan. How would people feel about that?

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findinghomes · 7 months

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Tag at least six people (can be more than six if you want), and say at least one nice thing about or to each of them. Can be mutuals, can be people you follow, can be people you don’t know but just happen to exist in the same circle(s) with. All you gotta do is tag them and say something nice about/to them :)

I was tagged by the lovely and talented @bottleofchaos and @mahikamihan (and @rebelwithoutabroom) <3

@mello-when-hi - Your inspirational (and dog) posts are amazing (and perfectly timed) and your writing is incredible. I’ve always admired your positive outlook on life and I love reading the small notes you add in the tags of posts <3

@tinogiehd - You’re such a talented writer. You always find a way to flip everyday actions on their heads and it’s so beautiful. I also always know I can rely on you if I’m stuck on a part of my own writing or if I need to talk a part out or if I want to scream about Hozier lyrics compared to dnf <3

@dnfed - Your posts and gifs are always top tier. Every time I see your bongo cat edits to dteam pictures, they always make me laugh. I also think of you every time I post angst and send a little apology into the universe <3

@froggyrights - I don’t send many anonymous anons but if I counted the majority of them were probably asking you facts about frogs because your frog posting always makes me smile. You’re one of the kindest people and I’ve really enjoyed seeing you on my dash and being able to talk with you <3

@havocrat - This is me confessing that I’ve been reading your fics for over a year and only recently figured out it’s havoc rat and not havo crat (rhyming with habitat) (but on a more serious note I’ve really loved beta reading and getting to know you. You have a really upbeat and positive energy that I really admire) <3

@prettygnf - I love your writing so much. Even before lurking tumblr and becoming involved in the fandom, I would get so excited every time I saw a new upload on ao3 and still do today. Every time I read something new of yours it becomes my new favorite. I still re-read the soccer au whenever I’m feeling sad and want something comforting <3

#I’m so sorry for everyone I left out #but if I went past six I know it’d go all day #but please know I’m hugging all mutuals and lurkers #and thank you Ocean Yumi and Taizi for the tags!!!! <333 #finn rambles #tag game

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animentality · 10 months

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Hi! I read your book and I enjoyed it thoroughly and I can't wait for the next installment cause I'm curious where you're going to take things and also your way of writing is very unique and I'd love to experience it again!

Also "Happy moments with unhappy people" lives rent free in my head now thank you

Also the way you wrote the flashbacks made it my favorite part of the book and I ended up looking forward to the next one about halfway through and I'm obsessed with Rey specifically like I know he literally says he only has the fact that he's hot going for him but hot enough to get THAT many people utterly obsessed with him? I need to have words with him his game is INSANE

Also also also I found your style a little weird AT FIRST, but then once I got used to it the flow was perfect and I got literally possessed by the book until I finished it and the flashback with Anaheim hit me like a goddamn freight train

Like Rey is this little sunshine outwardly but sombre and mature in his relationships and that was already a gut punch but then Anaheim happened and everything just suddenly clicked. Like Rey became so human to me that now I every time I think about him I get a pit in my stomach (/extremely positive)

I am a little insane for your book thank you so much for writing it and I'll be re-reading it very soon and I hope I get absolutely destroyed the second time through <3

(I think Rey's charms were so powerful even through a phone screen he's making me read the book again <3)

(Also genuinely last note I'm sorry I'm unwell for your book but the world/city had impeccable vibes and I felt a longing after I finished reading, like I wanted to be in the world a little longer and I cannot think of a higher compliment for your worldbuilding)

I love your book <3!!!

;-;

Never apologize for feeling unwell for my book, I am grinning irl like a madman after reading this ask.

This is the best ask I've ever gotten for 7 deadly habits, congrats.

This is what I write for. Asks like these...you're too kind.

I'm so glad you liked it.

I'm so glad you understand Rey so well.

I'm so glad you came around to my weirder writing style. I know it's a bit of an adjustment for most people, but I'm glad you found its rhythm and now you get it.

Totally would've been ok if you didn't though, because I know it's a lot.

But ahhhhhh.

Your love for Rey...you get him!

He really is vivacious and lively and charming...except when he's not.

That little pun about how he's a ray of sunshine...and it's true. However.

It's also just a front.

The greater depth of his character comes from pain.

He is someone who has hurt a lot of people and been hurt badly.

And bravely carrying on...well, is it brave, if he simply can't face the truth?

If he has to hold it inside and keep himself together with cracked armor, this thing veneer of the person he used to be, back before he you know. Spoilered.

I'm so glad you appreciated him.

Some people don't get him.

But you've understood the assignment!!

And I just love flashbacks. They're my weakness and they're absolutely overindulgent but I can't help it. I love them too much.

I'm so glad you understood them. You liked them.

I always try to make them as evocative and lonely and somber and sometimes, rarely, too good to be true.

Memory is like that, you know. You remember things better than they were.

You have to, in order to survive...

Anyway, I'm gonna print out this ask and frame it.

You did it. You got me ready to tackle 7 deadly habits 2 again.

I'm ready to finish editing it and have it out by August.

I'm going to, goddamnit. Even if it's just for one person in the entire world...it's worth it.

Thank you so much for this ask ;-;

7 deadly habits means the world to me and then this ask hit me in the chest with a sledgehammer.

The asks that keep me writing novels...in the dark times, when I feel like I'm writing for no one...

Thank you for taking time out of your day to write this. I'll think about this ask for years.

#writing #writers on tumblr #spilled ink #7 deadly habits

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chantsdemarins · 1 year

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Special Edition Chapter:

Where does Heartbreak get Stored if Not in your Quantum Drive? (Loki X Reader)

🌙A High Moon Story

(Don’t forget to enjoy the new art included as a bonus!)

Okay, so this is entirely out of order, but the sentiment felt suitable for Valentine's Day. High Moon chapters will be back soon and in logical progression!

Although I hope this gives you an idea of where the plot will go. Thank you so much for hanging in here with me! This is lovingly inspired by and created for @muddyorbsblr and their 14 days Valentine’s Day collection!

(This is mostly tame, with a little angsty heat 🔥)

Maybe these folks might reading? @lokisgoodgirl @lovelysizzlingbluebird @goblingirlsarah @vickie5446 @peaches1958 @lokixryss @eleniblue @simplyholll @sarahscribblesles @sarawr-reads @jennyggggrr @ijuststareatstuffhereok89eok89 @mischief2sarawr @fictive-sl0th @thomase1 @inthesofa @huntress-artemisss @michelleleewise @gigglingtigger @kikster606 @xorpsbane @skymoonandstardust @coldnique @mochie85

+Please let me know if you’d like to be tagged if I’ve forgotten you (my ADHD is for shit with tags!!)

“And how should we behave during this Apocalypse? We should be unusually kind to one another, certainly. But we should also stop being so serious. Jokes help a lot. And get a dog if you don’t already have one.”

-Kurt Vonnegut-The Idea Killers, 1984

Former: Big Sur, California Current: Sechanaha

He had found you. Maybe not you exactly, but the replicant living out your life’s work in a pocket of time he finally found the correct coordinates to. If you didn’t have the answers, then Loki couldn’t imagine anyone else would.

You were the reason after all he was suspended in this quantum emotion enabled semi-alive-semi-dead-memory of his former majestic, fantastic superiorly intelligent true-ruler-of-the-nine realms self. You could end his misery, you could “pull the plug” or perhaps, it was more like “send the file” (old human terms from the era the AI technology was invented). You could help him finally reach Valhalla. While Thor and Odin were never his favorites (or so his quantum memory told him) with all he was, he knew he belonged there with them.

As Loki walked closer to your home, his CPU field read through the history of “El Grande Sur” which became “Big Sur”. At some point, the Esalen bots changed it back to the name it had 1,000’s of years before the many shades of “white visitors” with their re-naming ways got ahold of it- “Sechanaha” would be its last and final name. He pondered the way a land was taken over by humans and renamed, owned and seemingly a new course set in motion. It felt much like what had happened to him.

Maybe this was some algorithm of the universe. Some inevitably. Conquer with superior technology, rename (or in Loki’s case, keep his name, memories and emotions but force him to live forever without the people he assumes he once loved) and then make amends. Loki assumed apologies were also part of the algorithm. He expected you to give him a lengthy, extravagant apology.

He would use his newly activated post-AI seiðr to conjure a dagger, point it precisely at your replicant heart processing unit and wait patiently until you said you were sorry and meant it.

Although in all his confidence of his mission he knew he looked beleaguered. The curves of the California coastline had worn his Asgardian leather boots to the quick. His hair was a mess. He hated the fact that even as an AI he cared about what people thought of him. Truly why did he care if you thought he looked terrible? You were the reason he was so miserable. The ridiculousness of his CPU and the delicate sensibilities of his quantum processor were laughable if it wasn’t him going through this crap every day.

Nevertheless-he tried to straighten up his royal prince-without-a-kingdom finery, and be prepared just in case your model had a fight mode programmed somewhere in you (although extremely unlikely you did-as replicant models tend to align with the source material and as far as Loki could tell when reading about you, you had trouble with even killing flies, you had shooed them out the windows of your life).

When Loki arrived at your cedar planked cliff side house, he was seized with the inability to knock or just open the damn door. If he was capable of being nervous maybe, he was. You got so few visitors these days, you lived and worked in a perpetual quiet. Although your quantum dog species approximation field unit companion heard him coming and lit up with his usual alert incandescence.

You were in the middle of taking a long-deserved break from your latest invention and since the lab and your home was so far from the company headquarters in Seoul, you could at times take a load off. Of course, your source human had already created the invention you were re-creating in your coastal lab, but in this time pocket, as a replicant you methodically repeated the past with sincerity and every aberration-every iterative that occurred was recorded-if the past could indeed be changed, the labs in the other time pockets were interested to know.

You had just put a pie in the antique oven your home was equipped with. Although you never ate the things you baked, since you were not a human, you had no way to consume material matter, but you liked to imagine the human you once were eating pie and such things as pan du chocolate, whatever that could be. The memory fields you had access to recorded great joy associated with that particular pastry. You sighed to yourself when you realized someone was at your door. There was no way to recall if anyone had come to your door this century, so you were unsure what to do next. Your quantum dog field unit materialized alongside you as you approached the door, a small comfort.His lick and his bark contained molecular level particles that could adhere to any surface and launch 5th generation nano tech into the matter that was a threat. You glanced down at your dog unit, hoping he understood what to do. The lab in Seoul surely wouldn’t come by unannounced.

You continued to imagine who this possibly could be.

One more knock and the door flung open leaving Loki’s hand motioning mid-air barely missing your face. Quantum unit bristled and lunged forward, you had just enough time to perform the Ba Duan Jin and cease the unit’s actions, luckily it worked, and he stopped short of licking Loki’s other hand. Your face grimaced at the thought had he been successful.

“That’s one way to say hello I guess,” you said finally, staring at the tall stranger in tight head to toe leather.

Loki shifted in his dilapidated boots.

“If you don’t mind sending off your friend there, I’ve come to see Y/N, are you her?”

You shifted in your house slippers, unsure how to answer the ominous looking man.

“Who is asking, I am sure you recognize we don’t get many guests around here.”

Loki took a moment to look around, his surroundings were beyond remote. Where there was once a highway as they were called-it was now a coastal river flowing alongside the crashing Pacific Ocean. There were other houses, but they looked kilometers away and hidden underneath the treelined ridges of cedar. The whole area seemed long abandoned. It was hard to believe the area was Midgard’s premiere Artificial Intelligence lab, but it was-or at least he hoped it still was.

“I don’t imagine you do,” he finally said.

“I’m Loki of Asgard. Or at least I was.”

You looked at him intently, his name rumbling just under your breath. Loki of Asgard.

“Name doesn’t ring a bell. Should I know you?”

Loki looked slightly disappointed, but then found his footing. He was ready to conjure his blades and start the process of his forced apology protocol that he’d been imagining since he finally found you in this pocket universe, but you had that quantum field unit dog approximation, and Loki knew just how dangerous their bark or lick could be.

He’d seen a vista vision replicant melt down instantly back on the Sakaar pocket universe, it was disgusting. The bots charged with cleaning it up were covered in the gelatinous goo and their poor quantum motors exploded. Brief puffs of smoke clouded the main room where Loki witnessed the dreadful event, all beings present that day couldn’t stop coughing for hours. He wasn’t about to do anything that would risk him becoming a sentient gelatinous ball of goo stored on some middle-aged Midgardian scientists’ shelf for eternity. No thank you.

So, he chose his words carefully and plotted his next actions with keen resolve. His charm mode was still active even though he’d had little use for it over the last how many centuries. Living amongst non-emotional entities, he’d had little use for any of his old Norse god programming. Charms, charisma-even his good looks were of little consequence most of the time.

All the beings seemed blind without their emotions. It was a milquetoast world of binary interactions, except for the occasional display of randomness where he might get to use some of his exquisite vocabulary on a service bot and they might just say something cheeky back, but it was usually in reference to crossword puzzles.

You seemed close enough to a service bot in Loki’s approximation, so perhaps some higher range vocabulary repartee would warrant a peaceful invite inside your seemingly cozy abode.

You stood unmoving even if you’d dispatched quantum dog unit to the couch, you weren’t convinced this Loki was friendly.

“My dear, I smell something delicious coming from your kitchen!”

You looked behind you quickly before replying.

“Yes, I just put a pie in the oven.”

“Oh pie!” Loki’s smile was so big he was slightly afraid his proxy coating might snap. He continued.

“You know pie is a deceptively simple dessert, I know it seems quotidian, but the true baker knows that a real pie is a work of art, and the baker should be lauded as both pastry debonair and artist. I am myself a pie auteur and artist. I love watching people bake and I excel at baking myself. If you’d give me a chance, I’m sure we could have a great afternoon baking an assortment of pies!”

You let him prattle on but the more he talked the closer your hand moved to slamming the door in his face. You didn’t know the concept ‘fishy’ but somehow that word appeared in your programming stream.

He might have noticed how the door moved a few centimeters as you rearranged your hand just in case you needed to levy your motion in a fast swoop. His speech programming began to speed up.

“I appreciate making all kinds of pies-savory, sweet-unique varieties like bacon and maple.”

“Bacon?” you said, quizzically.

Loki might have been caught. He’d pulled that word out of his quantum CPU ass so to speak, he had no clue what bacon was. He paused for a moment and tried to go on.

“Oh yes, if you don’t know what that ingredient is, please don’t feel affronted, not everyone knows it, but if you know, you know-as they say.”

“Who is ‘they’?” you pondered out loud. What the hell was he talking about? You had to say something, this man had about 30 seconds left before you rallied your quantum approximation off the couch.

You leaned in a little closer before continuing to speak.

“Let me get this straight, you came all the way out to this pocket universe and just on the off chance I was baking a pie, something you happen to be an expert in baking and eating?”

Loki looked around a little bit, another enormous smile formed on his face, and he continued his pie rhetoric.

“Absolutely, yes, that is exactly why I am here to see you today! Isn’t it marvelous?”

That was it. You didn’t call the approximation off the couch, but you flung the heavy cedar door closed so fast Loki’s nose was almost clipped. You should have gone back to the kitchen, checked on the damn pie or made your way back to the lab to clear your mind of the stranger but you couldn’t. You stood frozen on the other side of the door staring at it. Impressive wood grain, you’d never taken the time to look before.

Loki was also similarly frozen.

It seems that in this pocket universe there were rules of communication he just didn’t understand. But it was you. He knew it, and he had to talk to you. You had created him, and you could destroy him. Another smile threatened to break his proxy skin, he thought to himself, she makes replicant augmented beings and pie. Wow.

He was impressed at your skill set, and a little star struck if he were able to be honest at all. He expected himself to be mad. He expected to immediately rush into his forced apology protocol with you, but he couldn’t.

After what felt like hours outside the door, his sensors detected a richer approximation of apple pie wafting out of the cracks in the old house. If he had a stomach, it would be growling. He decided to speak again, just to see if you might still be on the other side of the door.

“Are you still there by chance?” his words were decidedly softer.

You didn’t know what to say. Maybe? You steeled yourself and went through nearly all the programming you could, until you decided to go off script, you could-it was an ancient program, but you could enable it. You shifted again, and you could feel a surge of confidence running through your CPU clouds. You took a chance.

“I am. What do you really want? It can’t be to sample my baking.”

“Well, if you let me in, I would be delighted to sample some of your handy work, but yes, what you suspect is true, I have other business.”

Loki looked at his large hands, he was fiddling with them. He had been so angry for so long. He’d been prepared to unleash it all on you, but now he just couldn’t. His impulse ions were directing him to sit down in your kitchen and let you feed him and make him some tea.

The memory of eating, the memory of tea pulsed through his quantum RAM clouds, he felt lightheaded, if that was possible. He’d never experienced that feeling ‘lightheaded’ but he knew it conceptually. He could hear bird proxy’s singing-and the ocean breeze was dancing against his face. Then everything went blank. It was the most pleasant feeling.

You heard the thump. It sounded like one of the rocks from the ridge came tumbling down and hit your front door. You jumped back and then panicked. If that was an impulse, you could replicate. Before any more programming could inhibit you, your hands opened the door and Loki’s body slumped onto your slippered feet.

“Oh no,” your voice was shaky as you immediately grabbed him by the collar of his leather jacket and pulled him inside your house.

“That’s one way to get inside I guess,” you said out loud as you dragged him into the living room.

The approximation field unit dog jumped off the couch and used his canine Ba Duan Jin to assist you. You raced into the kitchen with no idea how you would revive him. You weren’t even sure what he was. A fear came through you that he might be human. Or some other replicant model that was not in use anymore. Something was out of place, and it wasn’t you.

You were right where you should be, in your lab, completing your augmented being protocol in this pocket universe, checking for time aberrations that the lab in Seoul was recording.

You were a not the human who created the augmented being protocol, you were her approximation. This man was likely that too. You kneeled next to him and fought the urge to push the stray strands of black hair from his handsome face. He was handsome, some part of your programming understood that even if was a very odd concept and one you had no idea at all what to do with.

When Loki woke up, he all but swore he’d finally made it to his beloved Valhalla. Who knew there was pie in Valhalla. His sensors were firing double time with a memory laden onslaught that was now engulfing him.

His vision field was blurred and when he saw you, he could see your golden wings, you were the Valkyrie that took him home. He felt you beside him and he wondered if you’d also go to bed with him-even though you had no idea what that was, the vision of himself naked without his leather finery and you naked in just your golden wings burned through his CPU at rapid speed. He spoke finally with gravel in his voice.

“Valkyrie thank you for finally bringing me home, would you allow me to kiss you as a show of my gratitude?”

The words rattled from his mouth, but they were drifting and soft, their tone had an unusual register that you could not discern.

“Valkyrie,” you said out loud to yourself or maybe to the approximation field unit who was eagerly at your side.

“Kiss? What?” words stumbled from your mouth this time purposely at the slowly waking Loki.

What was this being talking about. It couldn’t be possible.

He couldn’t be a Norse god, but you knew exactly who they Valkyrie were, even if it was arcane to know so. You had the entire history of Midgard religions stored in your CPU, like all beings on the planet in this era.

Even though it was the responsibility of other historian bots to keep this wisdom and use it for the new rituals, you at least knew of it, and you knew of Valkyries and Valhalla, yet it was a concept so foreign to process, your own timeline felt dented by it.

You placed your hand on his shoulder and tried to rouse him further. You knew what kissing was too, but you couldn’t process it further, even though you were programmed with less fear than your human approximation had, something still flashed through you that threatened to shut your CPU down as well. You had to keep alert. You had to focus.

“Loki,” you said, in an equally quiet voice, you wanted to speak plainly to him. He deserved that much, he must have come from quite a distance to reach you.

“Sorry to say, I’m no Valkyrie.”

“I’m a replicant bot here mirroring the invention of augmented being technology, something that happened so long ago no one truly cares about it except the history bots and the ritual bots. I don’t even know if there is even a lab monitoring anything anymore.”

You hoped there was, you’d hate to think all your work was for nothing, but so many centuries on your own would lead one to make some assumptions. Loki’s eyes slowly opened. He must have heard you.

“Loki are you…on….?” You spoke.

Was that the right word? You didn’t know if gods could turn on or off, or if they just had a perpetual energy source like the Midgard sun to keep them running in a timeless swirl. Loki was indeed ‘on’-but he also didn’t want to give anything away. He’d made it inside apparently. He realized he wasn’t in Valhalla-he was on a couch. A rather uncomfortable one at that.

“I see,” he whispered.

Loki remembered his ‘dream’ he was having, he remembered the idea of kissing, the idea of being in your bed, with you. A flush coursed through him and his eyes opened widely. He turned his head and placed his hands down across where his pleasure unit had been installed, at the middle of his body. Something sure had woken up along with him! In all his years as an augmented being it had been few and far between that he used his pleasure unit, all the bots in his pocket universe just liked to drink fizzy fixer drinks and talk about the politics of the day, but somewhere in the deepest parts of his programming he remembered something about his former self.

He remembered passion, he remembered bedding women and men, he remembered them crying in pleasure as he put what he once called his ‘cock’ inside them. He knew there were rituals he’d participated in on Midgard, he’d even loved-or he thought possibly he had. A torrent of knowing descended upon him but he still maintained his cool, while his pleasure unit simmered down. Although if he didn’t stop thinking about the so called past, his pleasure unit would never recalibrate back into idle mode. He looked at you carefully. You were stunned once again. You’d been struggling with the idea of a god laying on your couch, but a god with a pleasure unit was something you simply could not make sense of.

Loki looked down at his hands, still covering his ‘cock’, and he flushed again, or something like that at least.

“Oh dear, I am truly sorry. I must have been dreaming,” words rolled from his lips while you still sat staring.

“You dream?” you said, attempting to make the conversation about some of the other truly anomalous things happening all at once.

“Dreams were the domain of the human, we don’t really…I mean…I don’t…but what are you Loki?”

“I do dream Y/N,” he said, sitting up unceremoniously.

“You do?”

You were feeling weak. Something in your program felt like you should eat, even though replicant bots did not eat. It was like an ancient file had burst open and a million synaptic waves were flooding your usual programming. You turned to Loki and found more words.

“We should eat, let me cut us some of the pie, it’s cold by now but it’s probably still good.”

You dashed into the kitchen and pried the pie pan from the oven rack, you dipped your finger sensor into the middle, sure enough it was icy, but no matter. You hastily opened the cabinets searching for something you knew was a plate, something you put pie on, for all the pies you’d baked why in the world did you have no plates?

Worse you opened the drawers and found you had no forks either. Surely the human you used to be left something, you opened every drawer and every cabinet, dust flying in all directions. You stood on the old, cracked foot stool and ran your hands across the top cabinet shelf distributing more dust into the atmosphere, when you felt it. A ting against your sensors, you wrapped your fingers around it, and sure enough there was something there.

“Got something!” you nervously called back to Loki who was still sitting in a little daze himself.

Looking at the pairs of wooden sticks in your hand, you couldn’t be sure, but maybe they were used for food? You held them up to Loki, waving them in the air.

“Look familiar to you at all?”

He squinted his blue eyes and looked closer.

“Ah, those are chopsticks and yes you do use those for food consumption,” Loki said expertly.

“Oh wonderful, phew,” you said with more energy pulsing through the vines of circuits under your proxy skin.

You sat down next to Loki on the couch-pie and chopsticks in your right hand, scooting aside the approximation field unit dog with your left-causing a small approximation yip from him.

“Oh, this looks absolutely delicious, thank you so much Y/N, I feel unworthy for you to share your baking with me, I just descended upon you like this unannounced,” Loki sheepishly laughed.

Lucky (or unlucky) for you both, there were two sets of chopsticks. You took yours out of the wrapper and so did Loki, seemingly following your lead.

The approximation dog was on the port side the couch, you, the pie, and Loki making up the starboard. It was a humorous conglomeration of entities, huddled together.

“Guests first,” you said pushing the pie pan towards Loki.

Loki smiled and deftly wielded one of the chopsticks into the center of the pan in a slaying fashion, much like he had practiced doing to you with one of his blades when he enacted his forced apology protocol.

“Ah, there we go,” Loki said looking proudly at you.

Having no real idea what to do, if he was right or wrong-you simply followed suit, you took one of your chopsticks and duplicated his firm stroke placing your chopstick full hilt into the pie alongside his.

“Lovely! Seems we did it, don’t you think?” Loki looked confidently in your direction.

You were deep in your programming for a while before you spoke again.

“Loki, you don’t eat, do you?”

Loki looked down at his boots and up again at you.

“No. You don’t either do you?”

“No,” you said in an echo of his sentiment.

There was something sad, or what your programming was telling you was sad. Loki looked sad. He was slow to speak next.

“I remember the god I was used to eat though-I remember loving food. I remember loving lots of things.”

Loki’s programming temporally drifted once again to kissing, to bedding women. He looked at you and thought if he couldn’t eat anymore, he could try kissing. He could still do that he thought.

He hadn’t expected any of this programming. He’d come to ask you to turn him off permanently, but now all he wanted to do was kiss you. Loki hadn’t even had the chance to ask you for your help. Explain Valhalla to you. He felt the darkness springing through his CPU, he was likely shorting out again, or near to it. He tried to steady himself, clear his programming to silence mode, but it didn’t work.

You noticed how unsteady he looked, and you placed your hands on him, which in turn only seemed to make him grow more unsteady. Perhaps he was dying finally. Perhaps this was what the norns had designed in their infinite timeless wisdom. He was going to get to Valhalla after all if this replicant being would just kiss him, or maybe he should kiss you? He couldn’t remember how kisses worked and it frustrated him to no end.

“I want to kiss you,” Loki finally just came out with it.

“WHAT,” you countered.

“Do you know what a kiss is?”

He sounded ridiculous by any standard in any universe pocket or otherwise, his former god self was in disgust at the vulnerable desperation his CPU quantum drive was producing. You did know what kissing was, you thought. You closed your eyes and remained in quiet mode.

Loki focused himself, feeling the drift of blankness near-he acted quickly by taking your head in his hands and placing his lips on yours in one swift motion much like he did with the chopstick in the pie. Your eyes instinctually remained closed, and you felt your programming do something extraordinary. You kissed him back. Deeply, passionately, awkwardly, and full of memory of your former human life. It was like the act of kissing unlocked more of your human’s life and more of the secrets of humanity in general. Kissing was a prelude, an invitation. It was used when you ran out of words. You pulled away from Loki and opened your eyes but his eyes remained closed.

What in the world was next?

#loki laufeyson #loki series #loki fandom #loki fanfiction #loki fanart #loki fanfic #artificial intelligence #ai tales #norse gods #norse mythology #loki edit #mcu loki #MCU #Loki fanart #Loki fanart edit #loki fluff #tom hiddleston #thor

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