#i dont know if the id needs more or less info
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return of those earth kingdom dudes ig
(id: digital fanart of sokka and zuko from avatar the last airbender. they are shown nude from the waist up and embracing, sokka on the right facing zuko with one arm around zuko's shoulders and one hand on zuko's neck, and zuko on the left with his back to the viewer, head turning to face sokka, with one hand holding sokka's wrist and the other hand on sokka's back, pulling him closer. they are about to kiss, their foreheads pressed together, sokka's eyes closed and zuko looking at sokka's face. they are in a tent, backlit by sunlight coming through the tent opening. end id)
#zukka#blee arts#i dont know if the id needs more or less info#its a first attempt hope it comes across ok#also does this count as mature content idk
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AITA for pretending to be poor?
I was taught by my parents how to be smart with money, how to budget, what a credit score is etc. I have always been frugal. Always go for things on sale, use coupons, have always went to thrift stores, and just generally try not to spend a lot of money frivolously. I dont use a credit card unless i know i can afford it and i pay it off in full each month. To me, this is just being smart and savvy with money and was how I was raised.
I met someone at university and we now live together. We date for about 3 years. I pay for some dates they pay for others. They've talked about getting me a ring.
Well I had been looking at my budget when they came home. One of my bank statements had fallen to the floor and they picked it up. They saw i had about 50k in my savings account and flipped out.
Anytime we had discussed finances I never gave an exact amount that i owned. It just wasnt that big of a deal to me. If i love someone i love you whether you have 5$ or 500$ to your name, yeah it may be harder at times but id rather be poor and happy rhen rich and miserable. My partner had brought up getting a prenup.
They accused me of pretending to be poor because I used coupons and wore clothes that had holes in them around the house(no I just have a favorite shirt that I've owned for years and is the perfect texture and softness and I cant find another like it), that i was lying by withholding my expenses. That even though i told them i made less then them (they know the exact amount, I make 30 something an hour and they make exactly 15.50 more then me in their field) that i had more in the bank. They claim that I have broken their trust and that I need to prove that I care. Not sure how as they won't tell me how, just that I need to prove it.
They accused me of being an asshole and pretending to be poor and letting them spend a ton of money on a ring and get in more debt when I could have helped them out. I told them I never wanted them to spend a lot of money or be in debt, and that I tried to explain why they shouldn't make just the minimum payments on their credit card. That I had offered to help them budget before and was told I was overstepping. I'd buy my own damn ring but now I dont even know how to feel because they keep berating me and saying I'm a liar and that I'm pretending to be poor and "what else are you hiding" AITA?
What are these acronyms?
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(rant about linguistics, aphasia and q!quackity’s impairments post-memory loss!!! to anyone who knows more about any of this, PLEASE add on or dm me id love to learn if anyones into neurolinguistics or anything of the sort)
ive been digging deeper into q!quackity’s condition (because I quite literally CAN’T stop thinking abou it) + taking note of his symptoms/behavior and it seems like what he’s dealing with could be called alexia (acquired inability to read) with agraphia (acquired inability to write), which are types of general aphasia, except i still need to know MORE about his production and comprehension i need to get in there!!!!!
it seems like he could be experiencing literal/verbal alexia with agraphia, which would mean he can’t recognize written letters or symbols at all and that is why he’s unable to read (this is all very tentative… all i have to go off of is my psycholinguistics class and as many academic articles as i can read). from what ive seen, q!q hasn’t actually tried to read any signs out loud, there’s no verbal attempt or production of speech which would make sense if he really can’t recognize the alphabet. BUT. what bothers me is that he can speak spanish with no issues. since spanish has a high proximity between phonology and orthography, theory says people who are able to speak it should be able to read and write the phonemes. and he can’t — or hasn’t tried. THAT makes me think he Can recognize the letters themselves
to confirm this i would really like to see him try to spell…. Or just name a letter! if its confirmed he CAN recognize individual letters, then id say what we’re looking at is more like pure alexia (without agraphia) — only a reading impairment, which would cause him to be unable to Arrange the letters in a sensical order. Its tough to check any of this w minecraft as a medium…. with a keyboard (or, in rp, on a communicator/in chat) it’s kind of impossible to know if he’s clicking at random or actually Trying to seek specific letters. but ill say that the way he sometimes dictates what he’s intending to write makes me think he DOES have the visual of each letter in his mind, and just struggles to order them or accurately transpose them
its also interesting to me how theres no sign of a speech impediment. q!q could speak fine from the very first moment we saw him. all hesitation was modal/owed to circumstance and not actually tied to his production of speech. i think that has more to do with the memory part of things! it could be that the extend of his memory alteration only goes as far as his writing and reading do. speech and comprehension come first in regular human development, and those are the faculties he has kept mostly unaltered. there could also be an argument to make about this pointing spanish as his first language (like cc!quackity) and english as his second, which would explain the dissonance between his production in one language and the other — but given that last stream he did express knowledge of english, idk if its relevant
i dont know much about the actual anatomy of things but i think it’s interesting that most aphasia cases are caused by lesions on the left temporal-parietal lobe. AND that its also possible for aphasia to be caused by head trauma like a hard hit to the head or deprival of oxygen (due to drowning? food for thought).
psa i know the situation in canon could be a lot less deep than im trying to make it. i get that. i dont expect the writers team to have researched the symptoms to this extent, but i enjoy discussing it. this is part of my major and a big area of interest for me so i find it really fun :) ill keep reading on this topic as much as i can and reblog w more of my musings if i find more relevant info. baseline qsmp team please let me in i need to study q!q under a microscope (lovingly)
#literally its ALLLLLLLLLL I think about since the return stream#WHAT THEY DO TO HIM?#kit.txt#qsmp#q!quackity#kit.meta
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a visual timeline of rain world's dated events, because it's 2 am and im autistic
Now, some important info. You will notice there are conventional dates in this visual; these are not canon but instead help us humans understand the ancients' ideas of time. A cycle is never given an explicit definition as a unit of time, so here we will equate the large number in the date, or the "cycle," to a typical Earth year. As for the decimals following that number, we will assume those function as typical decimals do.
So to demonstrate:
1543.067
Cycle or "year" 1543
0.067 of a year
0.067 × 365 = 24.455
approximately the 24-25th day of a year
Jan 24 (or 25) 1543
Again, these are not canon! They help make it easier for us to see the time between events.
And without further ado:
So, why is this important? I dont know honestly. But Ill share my takeaways because its my hyperfixation and Ill do what I want with it >:]
Unparalleled Innocence and Five Pebbles are the certified babies of the local group and likely are the same age-ish. My guess is that they had to have been around 50-70 cycles old when the Ascension happened. Babies!!
Sliver of Straw most definitely died before Five Pebbles came to be. Five Pebbles only learns about her secondhand through Seven Red Suns. He was not there to experience that event, which means the ancients were! Given that her methods remain unknown, the only ones who could've known how she died would be her citizens. However, that info shouldve spread. What likely happened? The ancients saw Sliver of Straw as a failure and decided to use Void Fluid anyway.
It is better to think of the iterator cans as "developments" or "neighborhoods" rather than cities, given how compact they are, and also how young they'd be compared to real-life metropolises! Meanwhile a neighborhood can appear and change drastically within a decade!
That being said, iterators can "live" a long time. Biocement already exists in real life, and the self-healing microbial colonies can remain dormant for around 200 years! However, water is one of the worst things for a building. These colonies will activate when a crack forms and exposes them to moisture. And since it's well...rain world: frequent erosion by rain and complete lack of maintenance severely reduces an iterator's lifespan as a structure.
Could the first generation of iterators be over 200 cycles old at the Ascension? Perhaps! But I think we severely underestimate the exponential rate of technological progress. Look at the last two centuries in our own world. Iterators in general have to be a lot younger than we think, as their infrastructure cannot last long.
So taking all of this into account...my estimate for the timeline of the whole game and not just the dated events? Can't be more than 400 cycles/years. The iterators are dying and theyre dying pretty damn fast. Id say even 400 is a generous number, as all of the "present" campaigns [Artificer to Rivulet] dont show much major change, save for the Rot. However again, that's speeding up Five Pebbles' decay.
Now Spearmaster seems surprisingly old. However it could be a result of them being artificial. But if that is indeed well within a slugcat's lifespan, that adds more credit to your shipping. Excluding Saint of course. Everyone is definitely dead by then.
All in all, I think we severely underestimate just how much can change within less than 400 years/cycles. Nature is very fast at reclamation, and in a world as volatile as Rain World? Even more so.
Anyway I someone out there has fun being a nerd like me Ive gotta go sleep for real now 🤙 lemme know your thoughts my brain needs stimulation
#rainworld#rain world#rw#rw downpour#rain world downpour#rain world iterator#rain world five pebbles#rain world lore#five pebbles#looks to the moon#does this even qualify as art#imma say no#too much effort went into this though#so i cant put it in my ramble tag#3 am oh shit#also suns is actually pretty ass???#why did they wait nearly 30 cycles before checking up on pebbs#and why did CHASING WIND have to be the one to remind them???????#maybe the friendship was fairly one sided??#srs you cant be srs
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HI ok u dont gotta post this i just wanted to give some info bc u mentioned wanting to do disability right and i just wanted to give info u might find useful. Leopardstar has diabetes and while idk if she gets murked or not before that goes into full force, but shed absolutely not be herself during that whole shebang.
The first signs would be increaded dirt place visits to go pee, and needing to drink a lot. Wouldn't be too hard for cats to miss this since they live in riverclan, Clan Of Water, but it'd be an UNUSUAL amount. Personally, i noticed it myself and genuinely got concerned bc i was drinking triple what i normally did and would wake up in the middle of the night specifically to chug water.
Next thing would be her getting skinnier and out of breath more easily. Her body would effectively be eating her muscles away and shed 100% be unable to fight well or even at all at this point- accounting for exercise and a relatively low carb diet of fish, maybe these symptons would show up after a month and a half? At this point a medicine cat could notice the odd lack of energy but i doubt it'd be obvious what was happening, the medicine cat might pat her on the back, give her some herbs (honey or berries would be BADDD), and send her off.
Soon after shed start throwing up sugar, which just straight up burns ur throat like hell. Its hell. She'd also not feel too hungry now- in reality shes starving, and her body is too busy not dying to notice nor care. At this point if Mistyfoot did Her Thing, Leopardstar would barely be able to stand let alone fight her. In her final days shed be completely weakened and barely able to focus, and she'd start getting pains in her stomach and pelvis. I was unfortunate enough to cut it extremely close, and when i was diagnosed i was told i had less than half a week to live if i hadnt went to the hospital. Depending on if the medicine cat catches on, they could absolutely be making everything 50 times worse by feeding her berries or honey to soothe her burning throat, feeding a cycle of eating honey and throwing up the sugars in the honey. I did this with gingerale and it SUCKED.
Now!! If you want to have leopardstar put up a FIGHT and have her have diabetes and live with it, theres a few ideas. Firstly, only type 1 i believe can be treated without insulin. Secondly, Bloodclan could 100% steal human insulin and give it to Riverclan. The two are compatible i /think/. Three, idk the exact process but apparently you can make ur own insulin using the pancreas from animals, which she could use to survive. Four, without medicine, shed have to do a lot of exercise and manage her diet. With a raw fish diet it's much easier, but she'll probably not be too happy about not being able to eat tunnelbuns without feeling like crap and throwing it up after.
Going down the Bloodclan sourced medicine route, Misty could also kill her using the medicine. Insulin is a delicate balance- too little and you start throwing up and ur body eats u again. Too much and you have no energy to move and you can die within the next hour. Doesnt even take that much, a dose of 18 when youre supposed to take 16 can be deadly. Double that amount and i doubt even a medicine cat could save her even if she knew- low bloodsugars make someone irrational or emotional + extremely whoozy, and its HARD to force feed someone honey when theyre adamant that theyre perfectly fine and just a little sleepy, thats all. In her sleep, and Leopardstar would maybe wake up briefly, feel extremely tired and odd and unable to move, and fall asleep and die.
Anyways this has been ur probably too long rant about diabetes and leopardstar hopefully its helpful in some way o7
[ID: A student is taking notes]
You know, in my rewrite, Leopardstar is actually going to be killing Crookedstar. Not in a way where she would be caught-- I had been thinking it would be a generic poisoning. Maybe it would be dramatic and fascinating if Leopardstar had actually pulled this insulin trick... only to then recognize that Mistyfoot is trying to poison her in the same way.
I'm committed to Leopardstar dying in a battle with Mistyfoot. I had this awesome idea for the Sweet Nothings AU where a Villain Thornclaw lead Hollyleaf somewhere that the winner wouldn't be caught for their victory, so they could have a proper fight to the death.
What if I used that plotbunny here instead? Leopardstar realizing that Mistyfoot had brought her the wrong dose of insulin (I will work out how they get insulin when I make a herb guide for it), and deciding if either of them is going to die, they will die honorably. Not by trickery, but by the strength of their claws.
So she calls for Mistyfoot, tells the Clan they will be confronting rogues at the border, and then they march towards their final confrontation.
#And as for diabetes--#The two guys who have diabetes in canon are Heavystep and Leopardstar. These characters are both Thistle Law supporters#So I will be grabbing some others to have this#Reedwhisker is the father of Curlfeather and Podlight in this so Frostpaw or her sibs could get it#Or even Stormfur#Or I could just grab some randos to have it. I think it may be cool if Mousewhisker has it actually#Since he has a relationship with Minnowtail#He could justify his meetings as going to trade for his meds#I will probably be making the WC equivalent of herbal insulin come from some sort of fish#At first I figured Pikes would be really cool since they have huge livers#But I need to look closer at big pancreases in british wildlife...#Disability#Bonefall Leopardstar#Bonefall Rewrite#Bonefall TNP#Bonefall Mistystar
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Hope it's okay to send this for the ask game! We've really enjoyed reading all your answers :)
🥀 + 📻
No worries! You can def send them in (and Im glad u enjoyed reading our answers :D I just figured everything was abysmally buried)
🥀 - do you keep track of your alter count? how do you do so?
So!! We use 3 different things for managing alter info, and then one separately. 📓 is our archivist and he is!! Bonkers /j.
First he uses simply plural for the custom field feature, and the layout of the app. He has a shit ton of custom fields put in for anything you can reasonably think of for an alter. Then, he uses Pluralkit because we have a system discord. Theres a template he made that we r going to upload soon. THEN in the system discord has an even longer version of the template he made (that cant be used in pk bc of the length). On top of it all, we have a notion journal with all the same shit + personal journals. Why did he do that to himself? /j lh/ No, but those are the three ways we manage to keep track of alters. Not all of them are uploaded, and furthermore, not all of them are uploaded in all of the places. We try to keep our simply plural for the bulk of it.
Other apps we use as a system that dont keep track of alters, but we find helpful regardless:
- Mindly: A mind mapping app that is pretty user friendly/easy to use. Not a super high learning curve imo, but it can be confusing upon initial use. If u are any flavor of polyfragmented, it may be harder to keep track with the free feature. We have 3 separate mind maps for the 3 separated areas in our system.
- Calm Harm: We have a horrible self harm addiction 😃 this app tho? It helped a ton in our beginning days of stopping. We don’t SH as much anymore bc of coping™️ but its still helpful for alters who cant control the urge as well as the others.
- UpWord: Its a notes app that can be locked via a passcode. It also has a built in reminders feature. We use it for keeping track of body info, extra info, routines, and general alter stuff. Its become pretty obsolete for us because of the onslaught of programs 📓 uses, but it keeps track of stuff for us still. It has a $4 upgrade to change the colors, remove ads, and more. Id say only purchase it if you end up liking it and using it more than other apps. It’s worth it imo, but if ur broke like me and $4 is a lot, hold off until you use it.
- Selftalking: one of those back and forth, self chat apps. I find it easier to use than Antar (which i still don’t know how to use to this day), but you’ll probably have to make the convos as needed, as opposed to making them all and having alters search their name,,, but it does have a search function if needed. We found the search function helpful. It is, undoubtedly, super ugly from an app design standpoint, and its not entirely user friendly. The ads are incredibly annoying as well, but its a much worth it $1 purchase imo.
📻 - do you experience amnesia?
Yes, but most of it is drug related these days I think (as 🎸, the addiction holder). We’ve been working on functional multiplicity for a while so (day to day) memory sharing is getting easier, but we have a lot of what our therapist calls “cold switches” where theres usually hesitance or stubbornness or any negative emotion that leads to the switch being more disorienting and heightened amnesia. Its like,, idk hard to explain?? Most of the time theres about 9-10 of us front at any given point. Its actually really annoying to have so many of us front and then our amnesia STILL sucks. Like imagine you switch w/ the dude next to you in front and there being complete amnesia between the two until prev dude briefs him on whats been happening.
The way our front works, whoever fronts the frontest (lol) usually has less access to the innerworld, usually forgets what they were doing on the innerworld, they also usually forget what we were doing in a time range of,,, 30min - 3/4 hours, and thats if they are cofront. We’ve had alters who when cocon can remember all this shit but when they front they forget a bulk of it. It’s weird, but we’re working on it.
BUT YEAH! Feel free to send in more or ask non ask game questions!
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SHIPPING INFO //ANSWER THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR MUSES SO PEOPLE KNOW HOW SHIPPING WORKS ON YOUR BLOG.
WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER(S)? Ironically, she was originally made for a Sett OTP, but has developed enough that she's become her own thing?
HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE? For me, as long as its not a huge generation jump (50+ years physically) and they are physically and mentally an adult. For Yzl, she's grown up near Vastaya and in a place where time isnt exactly a constant flow. As long as the person is mentally and physically mature, she doesnt mind age.
HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NSFW? Depends. Vague rp is fine, but the minute you start going into detail about things, even simple touches, i'd start putting the RP under a cut and tag it.
ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING? Kinda? I def prefer ships with interesting dynamics. Im not here for basic Highschool cooties. I want the FUN stuff.
DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU? Its preferred. Im open to shipping, but Id at least like to be consciously aware and consenting to that kind of decision.
ARE YOU SHIP-OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS? Im extremely open to ships, and will obsess over ships im really attached to.
FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU? Bring up the idea and win Yzl over in RP. I may be open to the idea, but she'll need some convincing. I mostly say this cus i dont like ships, just.... Appearing out of nowhere. I wanna build up to it.
Tagged By: @the-flame-blade
Tagging: Literally anyone that finds this, I dont know anyone to tag that hasnt already done it :')
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(hypothetically) if someone 9who wasn't a part of it) wanted to write fanfic about the otterverse, any tips/things to avoid/etc you would give for characterization? (is characterization a word? it is now)
well first off i'd say feel free to skip over asks that arent relevantTo the main story; thres a lot of chaos and u dont NEED 2 include allOf it. particularly with more for-fun/less plot relevant bits feel freeto use um. wats da wrsd. creative liberties.yeah. also interperet events how u'd like things dnt ned 2 be perfect
ok first cfelix has nrvr done a thing wrongEver xe would die for cpaci. despite cpaci bbetraying her. cPaci is a lot like villain!branzy & rise!leo imo so take thatas u will (flashy and gay). cOtter is a tired college student. also they blamed themself fr the apocalypse. cEcho is the dnd character i wanted 2 be when i was 8yrs old. give them CoolVibes
i think for characterization of specific anons u would need 2 ask whoever played them bt if u dont know or justWant more info u can ask me about specific anons
just feel free toThrow in little visual bits that arent actually there and diverge a tiny bit from canon
if youre looking 4 resources @felicityphoenix5's pinned has a good amount of links, or u can go to @the-otterverse or u can scroll #the otterverse on my blog
id probably give u more notes butTypin gis hard rn sorry
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hi id first just like to ask if you could please answer this anonymously as im uncomfortable with this being answering with my username/account attached. that being said something happened today that id really appreciate some advice on if you can give me any and also need to vent about.
basically, im a fat 17 year old with PCOS (the most significant way its affected me (other than my weight) at least to my current knowledge is a very rare/delayed period which i have started taking medication for that has helped quite a bit although it does have side affects of affecting my mood and sleep but i only have to take them for a little over a week 3 or 4 times a year and apparently those side affects will diminish over time so its not a major issue for me) and today i had an appointment with a dietitian that my mother had set up for me (and was present for) in regards to my weight and my PCOS (although before hand i only thought was in regards to my weight) the dietitian told me that my PCOS was apparently caused by my weight (specifically saying something about how fat around my pancreas was affecting insulin production) (saying so when all she knew about me was my weight and that i had PCOS) which i was somewhat skeptical of in the moment even though i hadnt done much research on the causes of PCOS and weight and PCOS specifically i had done some if not a lot on PCOS in general and most of what i had seen described weight gain/high weight as a side affect instead of the cause (and i have does some research since i got home specifcally via the blog bigfatscience here on tumblr and based on a lot of what iv seen weight is not a cause for PCOS) but when i brought that up she just dismissed it and i didnt really feel comfortable enough to push it further at all so i didnt and in general the appointment was really really uncomfortable and embarrassing for me especially with my mother there and there was a lot of talk on my diet which i really didnt enjoy and made me very uncomfortable but in the end the dietitian told me that i should eat less high GI foods and more low GI foods instead as that would help with things like having a regular period, gave me a diagram of a plate that was half vegetables and the other half split between carbs and protein as a bases for what my diet should be, and told me that i should try to loose weight and gave me a sheet with info on weight loss. im not necessarily against the idea of trying to eat less high GI foods (although i dont know if that would be sustainable especially if it was eating a lot less high GI foods and the main reason i was give to do so other than weight loss is to help have a more regular period which i am already on medication for like a said earlier so i dont see much point in that regard but my mother said she wanted a "more permanent solution") and i am somewhat skeptical of the diagram that was given to me although i havent done much of my own research on that specifically, i have however done a lot of research on the adverse affects of dieting and deliberate weight loss, and how losing weight doesnt long term and you will just gain weight back again which is more harmful and how trying to loose weight has negative affects on physical and metal health so i really do not think i should try to loose wight but i was also told that i should try to weigh myself regularly to see if im loosing and have another appointment with the dietitian which i feel like my mother is defiantly going to try to hold me to and i know theres no point in trying to show her proof that dieting and trying to loose weight wont work because i know she wont believe it and instead will either get upset with or dismiss me in ways that will just be very hurtful for me (i have experience with this in regards to things like talking about the way she treats my autism, her homophobia, and the many hurtful ways shes treated me in the past so i know what her reaction will be and that there isnt a point in trying to reason with her) (1/2)
so essentially i will have to try to loose weight regardless (especially since my mother is very strict and has a lot of control in regards to things like this in my life) even though i know that it wont work and will just hurt me in the long run. on top of this despite doing a lot of research into things like HAES and fat activism i do still deal with a lot of internalized fatphobia especially in regards to eating and i do worry sometimes that im close to developing an eating disorder beucase i often feel guilty for eating and good about myself if i dont eat or am hungry for a while and i feel like this is really going to add to that and potentially lead to me developing more ED habits or more of an ED mindset and i do already feel like its been affecting me in that way a lot like i havent had anything to eat since the appointment even though its been a several hours and really dont want to even though i am hungry and i know this isnt healthy for me to feel and act this way but like i said i cant really avoid it that much, i know this is a really lot of information and i dont blame you if you dont have any advice for my situation but if you can give me any or even just some support i really really would appreciate it, thank you
mod squirrel:
Well the first thing that stands out to me is that you are 17, so whatever you are being pushed into legally will end when you are 18. I know that abusive people will still try to force people to do things but that's a start.
TBH I would demand to speak to a NUTRITIONIST over a dietician. They are the ones more likely to work on making sure you are not being starved of nutrients. Also legally at 18 she can be asked to leave the room so if she INSISTS you go to the dietician after you are 18 (say by threatening to kick you out or whatever) you can have he removed. Also it is incredibly stupid to say ANYTHING about someone's insulin without tests? if you are feeling particularly salty, report that as medical incompetence to the hospital.
What I say next is based on the idea that you are fairly powerless and have to make the best of a bad situation: At least sticking to low glycemic foods isn't a terrible diet idea, because diabetics have to do it. You can have nutritionally balanced meals, when being pushed into a wall like this it’s critical you get enough nutrition.
If your mom wants a more permanent solution to your PCOS she should advocate for getting your ovaries removed but given that your dietician is a moron (sarcastic surprised Pikachu face) its unlikely to be on the table. You’ll potentially see weight loss on your hormone pills, when I started mine I lost some weight. because the hormones treat the issue that is causing weight gain. Im at the point that if someone who knows what PCOS is and they still think that weight gain causes it I’m calling into question everything they know.
You're right that it’s pointless and you are on medication that would actually effect your weight as it treats your PCOS but your moms a fucking idiot.
Again, this is a shitty situation. Focus on your own work unlearning fatphobia. Your mom has failed you but you don’t have to fail yourself. It takes a lot of work and its a struggle and that's normal.
Im gonna be raw with you. I had a gyno appointment and she kept talking about my weight and I had the same reaction. I felt like shit and like I didn’t deserve to eat. You can be doing advocacy and know the truth inside and out and it can still punch you in the face. Then I got angry. Anger gives me energy over depression freezing me in a loop of self hate. I ate food because she’s a fucking CLOWN. btw i find it extremely irresponsible for any doctor other than my primary doctor to talk about my weight let alone ask I cut something from my diet. So called medical professionals need to learn to stay in their fucking lanes. So I can say if I'm not there with you, we are down the street from each other. If you need to I say, eat out spite. If thats what it takes to make sure you arent skipping meals.
As far as weighing yourself goes, mention how each scale is different so its best to only be weighed at the doctors. maybe that’ll trick her into leaving that part out.
In the end this is indeed a shitty ass situation and I would focus on nutrition. Your mom can think its for weight loss but there's no guarantee it will happen period.
When you turn 18 things are going to be in flux so hang in there. I'm somewhat at a loss because as far as I can see its make the best of a bad situation. If other mods or followers have advice please share.
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gonna scream into the void for a second
trying to be more genuine with myself and others. Reaching out or complimenting people even if I'm scared to do so. opening up to people more, asking for help or setting boundaries. I also want to feel less scared of how I use tumblr. I want to be able to use my main blog without feeling like ill annoy others, or being more open about my kin identities. I often feel cringe for it which makes no sense because this is the "cringe website". like I can and should be myself this is my online experience
I was planning to redesign my blogs' structures before making the Big Switch but I think that's what's holding me back
For about a month now too I've been building a personal website on github purely for my gender hoard, kinlist, and pronoun/name info. It was originally for ponytown (lol) but it's been helping me improve my html and css skills andddd its been making me feel more inspired to make a general personal website
the ideas I have for a personal website would to just make it my place. I want to have info about my ocs on there, thoughts on certain media, random pages with useless shit that are there just because its fun. and I want to include stuff like the gender hoard and kinlist pages on there too because again, I want to be more genuine
I am the most stressed and anxious I've been in so long. my jaw clenching has started up again, I'm getting acne again, I constantly feel tense and my chest is always anxious feeling and tight, I've been losing the motivation to make meals and eat and losing energy. I cant keep up with college and at this point I don't know if I made the right choice in computer science. I have a passion for working with computers, but I realize now that passion leaned more towards the IT side of things and. im in CS. I have no motivation or ideas for doing projects outside of coursework unlike a lot of my peers. I'm closeted so I feel like I'm just fitting their stereotype of "girl cant do cs!!!!!". fuck!!!!!!!!
parents stressing me out and overall not taking into accountability I have disabilities
thats another thing, I haven't been able to get my ADHD properly treated since I got it diagnosed 4years ago. I also know im autistic but I dont want to get formally diagnosed bc of several issues, so speaking up for myself with that disability is impossible when my parents don't think im autistic and don't like self diagnosis
maybe its not too late to finish my degree and do a 180 and get into 3d modeling. I'm sure my passion with art could mesh with my programming skills there or something
I don't know who I am really. I always feel like other people have aesthetics or themes that fit them, and here I am with so many different interests in aesthetics and themes that I cant choose one. hoe do people choose a theme for a website? how do people decorate their profiles with a clear and solid theme? I feel like I always have 20 different themes that I want at the same time, its hard to choose one and have people only perceive that one with you
I have a headache rn
on the plus side i also had the tastiest clementine in possibly my whole life
I always remind myself I am only 21 I am so young in the grand scheme of things. but outside pressure wants me to know who I am at this exact moment. its so hard
fish and aquariums have quickly become a special interest within the last 2 months id say. im debating between a 10 or 20 gallon and what id stock it with. im thinking honey gourami and neon tetras and shrimp, but I love the idea of a betta fish or a crayfish. I've had to take care of a crayfish before they're lively little creatures
I want to be more social with people and make new friends or at least gaming friends, but im always apprehensive because I know ill be masking. need to try to open up more, might play more vrchat to socialize but its hard
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Pinned Post 📍
Hello! And welcome to my fnaf blog, please read this pinned post
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Icon by the wonderful @/mechanicalinfection !
Icon lore
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Nonbinary William afton post
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The fnaf animatronics are toy themed and I love this fact dearly. Here's 2 mini posts abt it
Post 1 | Post 2
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-My main is @daisybell-on-a-carousel , as such any replies, asks, follows, and other such things from me will be appearing from my main
-I am asexual and some flavor of arospec, my gender is a mystery to me
-Pronouns change alot! It's like russian roulette over here. Throwing darts at the board. I wish you luck. I will not be adding any permanent pronouns to this anytime soon. Whatever makes the sentence flow better I guess.
I've used He, It, They, Em, and She before. Neopronouns generally don't really work for me, but I am a fan of the bunny themed ones, like bun and bon
-Askbox is always open!
-William Afton and Springbonnie are my favorite fnaf characters I cannot stress this enough
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I am 18, While I like to keep my work mostly sfw, it's not uncommon for me to reblog suggestive content, please keep that in mind and block tags as needed! Usually I only tag things as 'suggestive', but if something feels a bit more explicit is will tag 'nsfw' and 'nsft'
Feel free to ask me to tag anything I post or reblog!
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I pretty much am just doing my own thing over here, I've been into fnaf since the beginning, and getting to do whatever we wanted with the characters is what really pulled me in! Games 1-3 are my favorite era of fnaf and usually what I stick to with my own versions
That being said though! I do still follow later games and canon, sometimes alot and sometimes a little. But just be aware be that sometimes a character, plot point, or location is removed entirely in my own au version
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Info about requesting art:
-Art requests are currently: closed
Art requests in tumblr inbox: 0
Art requests on Instagram: 1
(Ballora)
-Art requests open for any Five Nights at Freddy's things or characters, I will delete unrelated requests. Fan games and comics do count as fnaf, but my knowledge on most is limited so I may decline anyway (wont block or delete those requests tho, dw)
-Ship requests are fine! Though I may put in less effort because I dont like drawing characters interacting bsksbdks
-Suggestive is fine to request! but I might still say no
-If I don't want to do a request I tend to just um. Ignore it? I'm really bad at saying no if I can't think of a "valid" reason to, so I just,, don't. It's a bad and confusing system I know
-Please do not send requests for: Nsfw, Oc's, or concerning ships (ex: minor x adult, big age gaps or relative x relative)
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Id prefer if antis and anti antis/pro-ship didn't interact with me
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If you're interacting with me please please don't negatively call any characters psychopaths, sociopaths, or narcissists; I am so very tired of seeing these being used as a synonym for 'bad person'
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Babygirl Springbonnie
#pinned post 📍#tags:#darlingsfnafau#darlingsfnafau: lore rambles#fnaf reference#reference sheet#darlingdollydtiys#my art#my fic#darlings ballpit au#glamrock diner au#the nonbinary William afton collection#william in a bunny suit#rest in w.i.p
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Please talk more about your reboot!
16: If you could change anything in the show, what would you change?
okay so how i would re-do CANON is completely different from how i would talk abt a reboot so im gonna touch on a couple things in both contexts! the reason for the difference is canon rewrites imply i can go back in time and introduce dp fresh and new, before anyone knows what it is; but for a reboot, id be working with an audience that has a better understanding of the source material, so i dont need to spend as much time explaining, but i also need to keep everything recognizable
Valerie
REWRITE: i would def make it more danny's fault that her dad lost his job, like danny was intentionally being reckless and shattered some security stuff, and he has a whole mini lesson about learning to not just run in guns blazing. i would probably remove the dating stuff with her and danny (and tuckers crush) too, I think them wanting to be good friends is good enough for freshman year
REBOOT: the fandom already knows valerie exists, so i would actually skip the whole shades-of-gray introductory episode and have her be present as the huntress from day 1-- probably even before danny got his powers. cujo is also HER dog, and her backstory-- we'd find out in like, season 1, that a natural ghost portal (maybe one wulf opened) ripped open on her dog and killed him, and since then shes had a vendetta against ghosts cause of how reckless they are and their disregard for life-- of course, cujo isnt actually dead. cujo is a halfa. a puby halfa. anyway instead of a hoverboard she actually rides cujo around cause he can fly and its big and epic. valerie has BEEN amity parks ghost-eradicating superhero for at least a year (tho shes been in the shadows abt it) and her hatred towards danny actually just becomes really petty, like them flying next to each other chasing skulker just going "I got this. no I got this. no I got this" and they just get in each others' way and its a mutual grudge.
BOTH: i am NOT keeping in vlad giving her the suit to watch danny under any circumstances. it was only utilized half assedly in canon (when vlad couldve just had an invisible duplicate watching him instead) anyway, and I dont have any reason to keep it in a reboot either. instead i want her tech to be a combination of half-stolen and half-gerryrigged stuff and she slowly slowly learns how to build her own.
I also dont want anyone knowing her secret identity, except maybe her dad, and sam or tucker. i think it works better if danny isnt privy to this magic info
Freakshow
REWRITE: i would honestly just remove him. the episodes hes in arent particularly interesting, theyre just generic "we need a plot about x" filler and he's not compelling enough a character (at least in writing) to carry a better plot that another antagonist couldnt. i'm serious
REBOOT: unfortunately in a reboot he's gonna have to pop up somewhere or else ppl will be like "where IS HE" so I'm going to stick with running some kind of ghost circus, maybe a few occult things, but cut out a lot of the spooky magical knowledge and mcguffin stuff. maybe i could make him like, someone from vlad/jack/maddies college who always felt pushed around by them and so he has a vendetta? and theyd be the only reason he even learned abt ghosts in the first place. idk in either way I want to force him into being irredeemable but also include LYDIA (the tattoo girl ghost) way more-- I want to give her an arc that ends in her tossing freakshow aside and running off to be a ghost vigilante.
BOTH: dear god the infinity gauntlet is stupid that needs to GO AWAY. especially for the reboot cause it would exist in a post-mcu world and way too many people would complain about it
Vlad
REWRITE: amp him up to a far more sinister and villainous character. the crushing on maddie isnt enough, I want to show him on-screen performing experiments on ghosts and himself, dismissing everyone else cause he thinks hes smarter than them. i want him to be actively sabotaging the fentons at every turn. i would also clarify that he doesnt actually want danny as a son, but as a trophy-- a line where danny says something along the lines of "you don't want a son. you want a slave". i want to make him a character who wants to destroy the entire planet and put it in the ghost zone so he can be the true ghost king and i want to make this all evident from day one. if i'm writing a series villain you can bet i'm going to write a GOOD one. less petty drama here and more actual stakes.
REBOOT: it seems silly but sense with reboot we have the benefit of hindsight and recognizing that vlad wasn't a big series villain, theres no way i'd actually go back and write him to be such. for starters, of course, theres the fact that anything he does would really be an exaggerated part of the original, and it would bore an audience to see the same story again-- theres also the fact that it doesnt seem right to take a character who was treated as a joke half the time and suddenly make them big and important. no, instead for my reboot i want to lean into the petty gay uncle vibe. he had a crush on jack and now just casually insults him. he moves mansions every now and again by just haunting the family who lives in the one he wants, and taking over-- i mean, who is gonna believe that an actual ghost haunted you. he dislikes danny not because he has some concept of 'evil' and 'good' but bc danny is just too damn active. of course he actually does care about danny and his safety deep down, it's just on the surface they have very conflicting motivations-- not to mention that danny has been raised on legends from his parents of the villainous Wisconsin Ghost, who has to be stopped at all costs.
BOTH: i want jack and maddie to KNOW he's a half ghost and to actively be hunting him down for it, maybe bc they think hes possessed, or been a ghost tricking them this whole time, or the victim of a tragic lab accident who needs to be put to rest, etc. whatever the case it will give vlad actual tangible reason to despise them and genuinely suspect they dont have dannys best interests at heart. i think it would be neat if vlad was cynical and every time danny hit him with the "I'll expose us both. at least theyll still love ME" vlad could be like in the back of his head "oh god theyre going to kill this child"
Dani
REWRITE: cut her out. we don't need her character at all. maybe replace her with a more ominous shadow duplicate / clone that actually looks like danny himself and doesnt really have a name? you could probably combine her and dark dans characters for their arcs
REBOOT: instead of a clone from vlad, she's a guys in white creation using some of dannys dna after he was captured (and vlad broke him out bc he was like "ugh i guess i have to save this child")
BOTH: vlad actually cares abt her (duh), shes nonbinary (double duh), she gets the funny dissolve into goo powers
i had more i thought i was gonna write but this post is already very long and also im running out of coherency for this LUL
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danny phantom, season 3 episodes 3-6 thoughts!
see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3
-johnny was actually pretty civil with danny and left when he asked! thats nice. also, SKULKER?? HAD A FRAMED PICTURE OF EMBER?? oooo fuck wait had they established they were a Thing Before?? I dont think so. thats weird. its like that country boy/goth girl meme lmfao. I think i am going to choose to ignore this new info and pretend I didnt hear it. 100% unrelated to the jazz/ember fanart I already drew and posted....😳
-LADIES NIGHT EPISODE THIS IS WHAT ITS ALL ABOUT. wish it didnt really center around the guys or them being pissed at them, but. willing to bet this was written by men lol
-THEY ERASED ALL THE MEN??? meanwhile, jack and danny are fishing at. silent hill or something. im glad jack is trying to read a parenting book and making an Attempt. (theyre at lake erie, but, they made it actually eerie...thats fun)
-the girls alt outfits...cute. EMBER MADE A NEW SONG TOO!!! kinda. jazz being one of the backup singers and being AWFUL. NOOOO
-'how are we going to get kitty to blow a kiss?' 'she'll have to think there are still some males in town!' ...i dont know how to break it to you, but I dont know that a 100% het girl would wish for all men to Begone. I think. I mean im not a het or a girl so I dont really know for sure. she Is probably Bi tho. esp having the other ladies in town chanting NO MEN!!! excitedly............(then again, the kiss is to get Rid of men, so, she probably would have blown it at the ladies only if they were actively trying to attack/stop them, so...I MEAN. THE DRESSING LIKE DANNY BIT WAS SO EXTRA)
-I feel like an all female cast ep couldve been way way way way cooler than that was. like. why was it still somehow all about Men. ...anyway. (where was valerie...)
-next ep opens with the observants, and, way way more of them than I expected...existed? I mean I guess them being a council/jury of some kind is what I expected from their first appearance (bc at that time they were basically TELLING clockwork to kill danny, not asking,, so I figured they had SOME kind of authority) but. there were so many. anyway, here goes vlad! letting his own hubris go brrrr. releasing a weather ghost for political gain! #justvladthings
-okay say what you will about him (he IS an asshole) but having an umbrella with his own face on it and more prepared to share is SUPER FUNNY. and him being fanned by huge wads of money by his bodyguards. SO ineffective but so Dramatic. He UNDERSTANDS that if youre rich you need to be. you know. obnoxious and kinda eccentric about it! fuckign hate when rich people are boring about it. I would trust vlad with nothing except to not be a boring rich asshole who wears...fucking khaki or some shit. man knows his Presentation Skills. and that 'V' chair in his mayoral office. is that fucking embroidered?
-maddie get your MAN PLEEEEASSSE. IM SO EMBARRASSED FOR HER. the way jack stays simping for this man. in FRONT OF HIS WIFE!!!! ...my god its like a love triangle. jack clearly loves vlad, who loves maddie, who loves jack. jack fenton is at the very least bi, right................. this is an OBSESSION . 'THE V MAN COMETH'???? i...my god. (also, on a serious note, to have a friend THIS SUPPORTIVE...and still be SUCH A DICK TO HIM (TRYING TO KILL HIM AND STEAL HIS WIFE??) NOT COOL VLAD. JACK IS YOUR 1 AND /ONLY/ HYPE MAN. if someone loved and supported me THIS HARD...LIKE. CMON DUDE.
-STOMP the fucking GAS, JACK
-this would make a great shirt design, looks like a metal band design! we love The Maelstrom
-oh, so vlad did in fact get a mansion in amity park. and its purple! good color choice! not as flashy as a CASTLE or MURDER CABIN, but still pretty eccentric, which I appreciate.
-...vlad knows the difference between picasso and da vinci? in the ep last post where we were watching him fail at conquering every historical time ever he didnt seem to know history well enough to like. be effective...was vlad taking art history at college?? (was he an art MAJOR??? we never DID KNOW WHAT HE WENT TO SCHOOL FOR. I kinda assumed business because in the masters of time ep he was still rich without ghost powers so he had to have..known something about business or something, right...but also, art and or theater FITS HIS PERSONALITY. possibly also something science-y, I guess, but I always felt like he got roped into that, esp how pessimistic he was about the ghost portal in the flashbacks to college, like, i felt like he was just there for maddie and was uninterested/un-invested at the time...)
-THIS GHOST JUST ELECTROCUTED MADDIE (THE CAT) BITCH!! THATS MY FAVORITE MADDIE!!! vlad going after vortex and being ~shocked~ .....WHEN. WHEN WILL YOU LEARN. THAT YOUR ACTIONS. HAVE CONSEQUENCES!!!
-the way this random man with a camera sees the mayor laying in an alley covered in TRASH AND DECIDES TO TAKE A PICTURE HAHAH
*snap* this ones going in my cringe compilation!
-vlad 'if we're going to defeat vortex, we're going to have to do it together!' *immediately dips after dropping danny off in front of vortex* JKASDFHKJHJKN
-DANNY CAN DUPLICATE!!! ...he couldnt even attack with it, but he DID IT!!! INTO (4) OF HIMSELF!!! SO PROUD!!!!!!!!!!
-'THE ROLLER COASTER EMOTIONS OF A TEENAGER THREATEN MY PLANS!' ...0 self awareness of his own dramatic moodiness. incredible, how dumb this man is. its very close to circling around to endearing, if he was less of an asshole. at least its very very funny to see danny shooting him with tiny lightning bolts anytime he's even slightly irritated! vlad you should be nice to danny anyway. this is what you GET
-...making sandwiches and ice cream and playing video games with your nephew is a totally normal thing. WHY is vlad acting like this is the end of the world. if you were a GOOD UNCLE YOU WOULD ALREADY BE DOING THESE THINGS!!! bitch I make my nephew food all the time and dont forget what he does and doesnt like. if u didnt know danny didnt want tomatoes, thats on u. if u, a grown adult, are gonna piss of the 14 yr old by not letting him win, u deserve to have to pay for the arcade machines he ruins because he now has uncontrollable storm powers because YOU THREW HIM INTO A FIGHT WITH THE STORM GHOST. fuck u vlad. paypal me $400,000 while ur at it tho. (also, gamer vlad confirmed)
-VLAD CAN COOK THOUGH???! I assumed he had...people working for him that did that. I mean. billionaires usually dont do that. then again, we've only seen those vultures working for him (and I guess the dairy king was AT his old mansion, but it was never really clarified if he worked there...I think he probably just Hung Out and they Enjoyed Cheeses Together. thats what I think, I dont think a KING would be working for anyone and also the dairy king was nice <3) but then again he would be a private person and we cant have anyone accidentally finding Ghostly Things, so...still, that's hilarious. pour one out for that really cute banana split that got ruined 2 seconds later
-vlad just fucking picking danny up and THROWING HIM AT VORTEX TWICE WITHIN LIKE A MINUTE. JUST ABSOLUTELY LAUNCHING HIM. BITCH THATS MY SON BE CAREFUL!!! HES GOT ORGANS AND THINGS!!!!
-danny seeing those animal commercials and feeling sad is the biggest 2000s throwback so far. i legitimately had to change the channel or walk out of the room when those came on bc id CRY AND BE SAD ABOUT THEM FOR DAYS AFTER. fuck those commercials and fuck that IN THE ARMMMS OF AN ANGELLLL song 😭
-'vlads ego almost got the town destroyed!' yes danny thats the entire episode. the entire series anytime vlad shows up honestly. this episode was just him being really embarrassing the entire time, and, me laughing about it. 10/10 would laugh at him again
-NEXT EP WE HAVE A SHAPESHIFTING GHOST?? I've said it before but shapeshifting is the power I would want when asked those 'what superpower do you want' questions...its the Best power! this guy looks like a homestuck character. ive never read homestuck but thats the vibe
-I love every time we see tuckers family, they are by far the most functional family. and dash has a lil chihuahua!!! named pookie!!! i am crying (I've had 3 chihuahuas, so I am very biased, but...) AND HE WATCHES THE ROMANCE CHANNEL WITH POOKIE. POOKIE I WILL DIE FOR YOU YOU SWEET LITTLE BABY.
-danny can lift a bus! I shouldn't be surprised, but i am proud of my son. hes got lil kid fans. i am going to cry about this
-JAZZ KEEPS A SCRAPBOOK WITH DANNY'S LIL HEROICS AND NEWSPAPER CLIPPINGS!!! we've actually seen it on her floor before, but I didnt realize it was a scrapbook!! thats sooo cute.
-...and danny has to stand there listening to his parents saying danny phantom sucks and is a 'filthy ghost' and calling him egotistical...i am once again stealing their kids!
-THIS GHOST RIPPING JAZZ'S SCRAPBOOK!!! ILL KILL YOU. SHE WORKED HARD ON THAT!!! BITCH
-yes, maddie, the one with red eyes is For Sure Actually Your Son. ignore the, red eyes... (CLEARLY she hasnt watched the other 2 eps where danny has been evil, she doesnt know red eyes= evil!!!)
-'billy fenton'.......................
-danny being stuck as phantom in his own house, no way out is a fucking NIGHTMARE. his parents pointing giant weapons against him and SHOOTING AT HIM. THIS IS A HORROR MOVIE.
-NINE INCH NAILS POSTER.
-this is the most screenshot of all time
-amorpho turning into mr. lancer because hes 'someone no one will want to be around' BUT HES WRONG, I WOULD BEFRIEND AND HANG OUT WITH MR LANCER SO FAST.
-tucker dressing as danny, now I have the full Tucker set of him being sam and also being danny. also saying 'the ghost...uh...RIPPED MY FACE OFF.' and then running. SMOOTH. NOT AT ALL CONCERNING TO ANY PARENTS.
-sam accepts the toast from jack. and then 2 seconds later is like 'why am i eating this.' THIS SHOWS HUMOR IS SO UNEXPECTED SOMETIMES ITS REALLY GOOD. and then the scene after, mr lancer running into his ghost doppelganger and being like 'YOURE GORGOUS' THEN FAINTING. I AM CRYING. AND DASH FAINTING TOO.
-sam disguising herself as danny again to help tucker run from the fentons. but leaving him shirtless in the streets. incredible. 'plEASE DOnt NOTice MY FACELessNESS I MUST LIVE IN EXILE' this episode is destroying me the humor in this show is exactly my brand of corny and cheesy
-the impromtu story made up by danny and amorpho to explain stuff to the fentons. my god they are both such bad liars. but amorpho is a good egg. wish danny wouldnt have said he didnt wanna see him in town again!! I want him to be reoccurring. not that thats gonna matter since I'm almost done with the series, but the idea of this being the Only Time We See him is :(
-NEXT EP SAYS STARRING MARK HAMILL??????!!! hello ! mr . joker....mr. star wars.... I feel like I should be. idk. taking off a hat im not wearing in respect. I shouldnt be surprised tho bc hes in a lot of cartoons as a very good voice actor, and dp has already had a lot of talented ones so I've been looking out for ones I might know, but....mr. hamill....
-sam has her own greenhouse, names all the plants, and says thank you to them (in the languages from where the plants are from) whenever she harvests from them. thats SO cute. and her lil gothy lunch box...
-and danny's lil red fuzzy lined jacket!!! ive said it before but every time the characters get alt outfits im like :D
-danny has ice powers now!!! THATS WHAT FROSTBITE MEANT. HE KNEW SOMEHOW WAY BACK THEN
-THIS SHOW NEVER LETS YOU FORGET VLAD IS A BILLIONAIRE, HUH.
-danny's lil 'holy hibiscus!' first off the 50s batman swearing is hilarious. 2nd. my username is from the flower sanchoyo hibiscus, so, shoutout to ME this ep. hi :)
-EURGH UNDERGROWTH MAKING EVERYONE PLANT ZOMBIES. HIVEMIND PLOTS SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF ME. and this dude made the city SO overtaken so quickly like how long was danny asleep?? oh god
-evil fucked up sam! now the whole trio has gone evil at some point! the voice actress did a really, really good job with making her sound like a zombie...
-frostbite's paws are so so so big compared to danny. oh my god. i want to hug the snow dog...
-the far frozen has an advanced medical stuff!!! very cool. very smart snow dogs
-im so glad danny has a friendly ghost snow dad to explain this new power and teach him!!! this is so sweet. DANNY'S GHOST SENSE WAS A PART OF HIS ICE POWER?? OOOH. COOL. we love a training montage!!!
-danny saying if he cant defeat overgrowth, that he'd want to stay with frostbite...oh my god...do you think this is the first real supportive adult figure in his life (I am NOT counting his parents because they threaten him on the daily even if they dont realize it.) I mean mr lancer is a Teacher, but he was also nice but this is different, but this is a GHOST WHO IS WILLING TO HELP HIM with his powers and also will help him when hes injured and is so so nice and comparatively so much more mature than 90% of the adults in this show!!!! god. dad frostbite is my everything.
-the framing and lighting this episode, and all the angles...they went all OUT and it looks really really good. this is my nightmare scenario, tho. like, FUCK zombies and dead city zones and hivemind shit. and using the humans as 'nutrients for the children' i am going to THROW UP.
-MALEFICENT VIBES WITH THE HORNS AND GREEN EYES! this costume kicks so much ass. sam is now mark hamills daughter, I guess.
-danny's ice powers making his eyes blue!!! thats neat. and him going for the roots underground was SO SMART. i will not stand for danny ever thinking hes stupid, hes SO smart.
almost done with the show... :"( thats a sad thought!!!
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INFO DUMP: I thought i'd dyye by comitting not alive before graduating high school. Im in college now and everyone thinks im passionate about my career, but in reality im just clinging onto it to fit with people my age. I have no actual plans and i sure am not enthusiastic about the future. I actually tried comit-not-alive method but obviously failed, now my parents think im "crazy" and make comments about frequently, making me even more disinterested in turning to them and i rarely open up with them to begin with. I feel so distant to my friends now, they have a vast different interest ive tried but cant catch up with anymore and theyre busy with their education, i dont want to bother them. Im really trying my best to distract myself from my shittery but and not to burden my parents from expensive medication costs, but its really tiring.
Id understand if you prefer not answering this ask, this sounds like im trying to list every inter and intra personal problem in the world.
First of all, anon, let me just say that I’m extraordinarily glad you’re still here to be writing this ask and hopefully reading this response.
In such a short paragraph, you essentially sent out an apology for existing about three times, expressing that you feel you’re a burden on your parents, your friends, and even to me. To the latter I say, your problems and your feelings are so completely valid, and you shouldn’t feel bad about telling them to someone who willingly and gladly opened herself up to hearing them (by reblogging that post about anonymous confessions).
Admittedly, I have less context about your friends and family, but from what I know of my own experience? You won’t bother them by expressing your worries and fears. Any good friend would be more than open to listening, and if they’re not, then frankly, they’re not a friend worth having. Everyone is busy, particularly college students, but I know if I had a friend who was going through something like you’ve described, I would drop everything to listen to them, and help if I could.
In terms of your parents, any parent worth their salt would want to do their best to make their child happy and healthy. You asking for help is not a terrible thing to do, it’s not selfish, it’s not bad, it’s necessary and important. The cost of medication can be rough, but the best course of action would be to work with your parents, see what plan you can come up with together. Maybe you do need medication, maybe you want to start with talk therapy, but either way, you should not feel guilt for needing these things, and I’m so sorry if your parents, or anyone else, has made you feel that way. Sometimes parents are not the best communicators, especially when they’re scared (which I can only assume they were after your attempts). That’s not your fault.
Your unhappiness is also not your fault. It is not a failing on your part, it is not a burden to other people. It is the extremely unfortunate hand you were dealt, and there is absolutely no shame in asking for help.
If you take anything from this, let it be the ol’ standby: you’re not alone. Because it’s true :) Feel free to send me a message or a chat on or off anon if you need to <3
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Small Buff Girl Sightings Ch. 5
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | ao3
3:00AM | CoffeeVamp: bb bat update us
TheOG: ^^ more info on the situation in paris
3:28AM | Demonspawn: It is difficult to obtain information on Hawkmoth. The butterflies disperse after they are cleansed, and before they land their target, they don’t show up electronically.
Coffee Vamp: o how the mighty have fallen i thought u said u could best me bb boi
3:42AM | Demonspawn: I’d like to see you do better.
Coffee Vamp: IS THAT A CHALLENGE
Coffee Vamp: ill take u up on that gimme 24 hours and ur going down
TheOG: he has had a whole month so dont be too sure of that
LadyLady: would you guys SHUT UP its two and some of us have jobs to do
Coffee Vamp: cmon babs u luv us dont deny it
LadyLady: Don’t make me hunt you down, Tim.
Coffee Vamp: oOooO proper punctuation im shaking
TheOG: just shut off notifications Babs
TheOG: Bruce does
Jesus: i don’t think the man has checked this chat in years
Coffee Vamp: wdym brucie checks the chat all the time hes just a silent lurker
Coffee Vamp: he doesnt even set himself to invisible
3:57AM | Daddy is away.
Coffee Vamp: im so glad i have admin privileges imagine if i didnt bruce would have a boring normal nickname like his actual name
LadyLady: good lord, why am I even in this chat??
Daddy: You’re supposed to keep them under control.
Coffee Vamp: SEE I TOLD U BRUCE IS A SILENT LURKER> THIS. IS. SOLID. PROOF. IN YOUR FACE
TheOG: nobody said otherwise
Coffee Vamp: also how are the people have you made friends
Jesus: Demon spawn? Making friends? Id be less surprised if he told us he has a new fling
Coffee Vamp: is j right? Got a winter fling?
4:12AM | Coffee Vamp: ur lack of a response tells us nothing
TheOG: im sure he’s just adopted his usual icy persona
Coffee Vamp: haha hes the bb of so many things
Coffee Vamp: bb vamp bb demon spawn ice ice bb
Coffee Vamp: getitt im so funny
4:36AM | Coffee Vamp: guys?
“I told you I could get her to write her number on your cup,” Marinette grins with pride.
“And I told you I didn’t want her to.” Damian scowls and kicks a pebble in his path.
“You’re still wearing the clothes I picked out for you,” she points out.
“You told me to wear it. I wore it. I’m not interested in her.”
Marinette squints at Damian, evaluates whether he’s telling the truth or not. “Huh, you really aren’t interested. I guess it’s a good thing you didn’t wear the other outfit I picked out for you-- that one would have gotten her to ask you out on the spot.”
Damian groans. “We’re going to have to find a new coffee place.”
“Or we could just come when she��s not on shift and run away like mice when we do see her?”
Damian gives her The Look.
“But they have good coffee here,” Marinette whines.
“Maybe you should have thought about that before dressing me up and sending me to my death.”
“It’s not my fault! You only have your parents to blame for your looks.”
It’s true; both of Damian’s parents are good-looking. His whole family is, actually, adopted or not. All of the good looking people he meets are talented and have a tragic life story. Which is the cause and which is the effect, Damian isn’t sure. But it holds true even in Paris. All he has to do is look at Marinette or Adrien, though he’s not a hundred percent sure where the tragedy kicks in for Marinette. Probably the time when she was at odds with Lila, but he hasn’t looked much into the situation. He can even use Lila Rossi as an example. She has even worse color coordination than Damian is, but her features are model worthy. Lila Rossi is also definitely fucked up in ways that Damian doesn’t care to explore.
The effects of Marinette’s well-placed compliments has Damian thinking about himself in a positive manner that he never has before. Bruce is always stingy with praise, and the other senior members of the Justice League of America see him as another Robin that doesn’t need praise because competency comes with the mantle. Dick and Barbara compliment him occasionally, but that’s rarer now that his place is more firmly cemented in the family. Damian doesn’t think he’s ever had someone so willing to genuinely compliment him. Marinette’s compliments extend to more than just his looks, as well. She praises his technological skills as he sets up her website and has complimented him as he helps her out with whatever altercations she inevitably comes across on the streets. If he reveals his skills as Robin, reveals himself as Damian Wayne, will he receive even more praise?
“But since we did buy you that absolute knockout of an outfit, you’re going to have to wear it eventually. So whose heart do you want to steal?”
“I don’t want a relationship,” Damian repeats. They seem like more effort than they’re worth, and he always sees couples fighting and complaining about each other. Plus, they have to make time for each other and his alter ego doesn’t allow for that, though he supposes that he isn't Robin. At least, not right now.
“You don’t need to want a relationship just to flirt with somebody. Who’s it going to be? The intern at the Louvre? My parent’s newest hire? Oooh, how about Nicolette?” Marinette’s voice takes on a more mischievous tone.
Damian will give Marinette this much: her taste in the aesthetics of people is far from bad. The intern from the Louvre is two hundred pounds of lean muscle with a devil-may-care smile and a deep, belly laugh that makes people laugh with him, but Damian and he don’t have anything in common. Her parent’s new hire is knockout gorgeous, with warm brown eyes, and definitely the kind of girl Damian would have gone for as a one night stand back in Gotham. However, he’s also 98% sure that she has a very possessive boyfriend who stops by the bakery every time she has a shift. Nicolette is considered her college’s belle, and her intense gaze paired with her surprisingly friendly demeanor might have been appealing to Damian if she weren’t ten years older than him.
“I’m not into any of them,” he says, simply.
“Then who are you into? Surely someone has caught your eye in the past month?” Marinette looks genuinely curious, but her expression shifts into horror. “Oh my god. I’m so sorry. I never asked your preferences, if I was being insensitive, I’m sorry, I mean I’m pan, but you absolutely don’t have to tell me, it’s your right if you’re not comfortable.”
Damian does look slightly uncomfortable now that she’s looking at him more closely. His arms are crossed over each other, across his chest, and his hair is tousled. Then, he lets out a small laugh, and Marinette melts. “It’s fine, Pigtails. All of the people you listed are attractive, but I’m not attracted to them. I’m more of a personality guy, though I can’t say that personality has stopped me from things more than dates before.”
He’s had his fair share of hook-ups and makeout sessions in the past when feeling particularly frustrated with something that wasn’t going his way, though his primary method of relief is through sparring. Short missions and one night stands go fairly well together; he doesn’t ever have to deal with people wanting long term relationships, and even if they do, he’s gone before they know it. So far, he hasn’t hooked up with anyone in Paris, but then again, he’s only been here for a month and this is a long term mission. Whatever time he’s not with Marinette or at school is dedicated to piecing together the mystery that is the Miraculous and trying to figure out Hawkmoth’s identity.
“Oh,” Marinette continues to blush.
She’s clearly too embarrassed to bring up any other topic, so Damian decides that he’ll shoot the same conversation topic back at her. Marinette is attractive, and people she meets ask for her numbers and dates often enough. She’ll accept the former if they aren’t a total creep, but she always turns down requests for dates.
“And you? Why aren’t you out there questing for love? No crushes or significant others that I need to beat off with a stick?”
This does manage to lessen her flush. She frowns, turns something over in her mind.
“No crushes right now, no. I used to have a huge crush on Adrien just a year ago. He’s such a sweet person, but we don’t see eye to eye on important matters.” And also not into sex, either. Even physical affection hits him the wrong way sometimes, which makes Marinette worry even further for his well being with Lila’s constant touches. Still, he hasn’t said anything, and Lila hasn’t done anything more than grasp his arm or shoulders every now and then, to reassure the class that yes, they are the golden couple. Marinette also suspects that he is very unwilling to talk about the whole situation in general, and it’s not as though they’re super close.
Of course she had a crush on Adrien. Damian can see it now, Marinette looking at Adrien with her big blue eyes, her lashes fluttering when she gets close to him. Stuttering when she gets embarrassed or when she gets close to him. It makes his lungs constrict, but he’s not sure why.
“As for past relationships, there’s only really Luka. We had a pretty good run, but he’s out of the country, touring. He wanted to try long distance, but I didn’t really want that. But he’s respectful-- there’s no need to beat him off with a stick or anything.”
“I’m surprised a pretty girl like you doesn’t have more suitors,” Damian says, stepping over a crack in the sidewalk as they walk towards the park.
Marinette gags. “There are some other people who have been interested, but I wouldn’t exactly consider them relationship material. If you’re going after a girl just because she looks exotic, that’s sort of nasty. I guess I’m just unlucky in love.”
“At least you’re not as bad off as Ladybug is,” Damian jokes.
She looks at him strangely. “What makes you say that?”
“Well, first there was that creepy sculptor who must have been twice her age, then there’s Chat Noir who keeps flirting with her despite her requests not to, plus all of the random love akumas. I’m not even going to talk about the hordes of guys who chase after her, trying to get a date just because she’s a superhero. It’s not even like she can kick them between the legs because she has an image to uphold and all that.” He smirks, nudges her with his arm. “I’m surprised you haven’t done that with some of your stalkers.”
“Oh. You’re right, huh. Though, I don’t think Chat Noir has actually flirted for a while now.” Chat Noir has been very subdued as of late, and it makes Ladybug worry.
Marinette feels uncomfortable with the way the conversation has shifted. How does Damian know about all of these past akuma attacks? As far as Marinette is aware, most information about anything Miraculous related is difficult to get a hold of abroad, largely because the Miraculous try to hide their existence as best they can, and partially because Mayor Bourgeois doesn’t want word to get out that he hasn’t flushed a supervillain terrorist out even though he’s had three years to do it.
“Copycat happened three years ago.” It’s a question, almost.
“I figure I might as well keep up with the heroes of Paris. I’m here and they’re interesting.” Damian figures this is as good a time as any to bring up his interest in Hawkmoth. Marinette has been nothing but helpful and she’s definitely the kind of person whose heart is in the right place. Not to mention that she’s definitely smart and seems impartial; the one time he asked her about her thoughts on the heroes, he found out that she didn’t see them as perfect. She was able to critique Ladybug in full, which seemed pretty odd considering the rest of Paris seemed to have nothing but glowing praise for the heroine. “You’ve had some awful luck with akumas yourself. Weird how Ladybug didn’t show up when you got kidnapped by Evillustrator. One of the only times she didn’t show up for an akuma.”
“And what happened to the other heroes? It’s mostly Ladybug now. She must be in an awful state with her civilian life.” He looks off to the park, occasionally flicking his attention back Marinette’s face, evaluating her expression.
She catches his eyes and he swiftly looks away, looking almost nervous. Marinette stiffens. He knows, he knows, he knows, he can’t know. But how? How does he know that she’s Ladybug? She hasn’t let anything slip around him. She's been careful not to. Everything she’s ever said about Ladybug has been brief and curt, taking on an almost angry tone.
“If you’re so interested in Parisian heroes, I’m sure you saw the press conference Ladybug and Chat Noir gave last year about why the other heroes would be showing up less often.” Marinette keeps her voice carefully neutral. She needs to play this safe. She’s probably over reacting-- she’s been on edge with Hawkmoth sending out an akuma attack nearly every single day for the past few months.
Damian shakes his head. “It didn’t seem like good reasoning. Ladybug and Chat Noir are too untrained. They haven’t beat two villains in three years. They should let someone else take over.”
Marinette has come across a good number of Ladybug and Chat Noir haters throughout her time. Those who dislike the Parisian heroes often make the exact same arguments Damian is now. That they’re not fast enough. That they should have taken down Hawkmoth and Mayura already. This is nothing new to her, though it does hurt hearing it from Damian, for some reason. She can’t even argue with most of the points he’s brought up. Going mostly solo was because of her own, selfish reasons. She really should have beaten Hawkmoth and Mayura by now.
“The only thing they have going for them right now is that they’re keeping their Miraculous out of Hawkmoth’s hands.” She pretends that the reason why Chat Noir doesn’t show up to battle is to ensure that Hawkmoth can’t get both of the Miraculous in one fell swoop. It feels hopeless to fight villain after villain without any movement forwards. Her mind wanders to the increasing frequency of akumas and smiles, sardonically. “Some people think it’s only a matter of time until Ladybug and Chat Noir lose.”
“Hawkmoth almost seems to be the better strategist.” The two of them pass store front after store front. “Do you ever wonder what they look like, under the mask? Who they are?”
Marinette stares at the concrete underneath her feet. Hawkmoth, the better strategist? Laughable, and entirely incorrect. Even the people who hate Ladybug admit that her plans almost always work out, and that her plans are second to none. Really the only person who can possibly think that Hawkmoth is a better strategist is--
She can’t think like that. Damian is her friend. He’s just curious about Paris. Her lack of sleep and increase in paranoia re making her imagine things that are impossible. Besides, Damian isn’t on her list of suspects-- he told her he’s only been here for a short time, and Hawkmoth’s Miraculous definitely has a limited range. It’s a real pity that the world of Miraculous makes concrete evidence hard to come by, otherwise, Marinette likes to think Hawkmoth would have been behind bars already.
“No,” she lies. Hawkmoth haunts her dreams and every waking hour. She spends hours and hours on theories and scouring out information and people who fit the clues she’s painstakingly pieced together. “Not really.”
Damian’s eyes are a piercing green, and for a moment, Marinette thinks she stops breathing. “Is that so? I’m really interested in who Ladybug is under the mask. I’d love the opportunity to talk to her in person, especially about her Miraculous. The powers she has are… very interesting.”
No. There’s no way that Damian can be Hawkmoth, right? This is all just her paranoia speaking. Damian is just a foreigner who is interested in super heroes. It’s no biggie. Still, she can’t shake off the idea that there’s more to Damian than meets the eye. The way he walks-- no, prowls-- commands respect. Marinette can tell that he knows how to fight, and knows how to fight well. He’s very good at finding information on people-- she sent a whole case file to her on Renee and his situation with his mother within twenty four hours of going into the precinct, complete with video evidence Marinette knows should have been impossible to procure without hacking-- and keeps up with her critiques on Ladybug and Chat Noir’s techniques like he’s watched their battles over and over again. He remembers akuma battles Marinette has half forgotten, because they happened so long ago.
She stares up at him, hands shoved in the pockets of the jacket she chose for him when they went on their wardrobe makeover. Damian is surprisingly wealthy; he purchased anything she even glanced at with passing approval. He looks straight forward, apparently waiting for some response from her. Just because Damian is her friend, doesn’t mean she can immediately expunge him from her list of suspects. So far, she has taken all of Damian’s words at face value. It didn’t matter to her that he rarely talks about his family or his life before Paris. It didn’t matter that he hadn’t brought her to his home during all of the weeks that they’ve been hanging out together. Really, Marinette just figured that he had a rocky relationship with his family, and that he may have been on the poorer side and was embarrassed to show her where he lived. But clearly. Damian is well off enough to afford brand name clothes without batting an eye. Things aren’t adding up. All of the red flags that she’s blatantly ignored start to crop up in her head.
The book on the species of butterflies that akumas are made of, tucked under his arm. The way he showed up after every single akuma attack when she rarely saw him in the area before or during it. His knowledge of the three languages that form the basis of the Miraculous Tome-- Mandarin, Arabic, and English.
If he is Hawkmoth, what sort of emotions would he be feeling right now? Some sort of euphoria, maybe, realizing that he could get infinitely closer to Ladybug when she is Marinette. Anticipation, too. Has Marinette been hanging out with a super villain for the past month? Has she really come to the point where she can call a supervillain her best friend?
Marinette takes another look at Damian’s outfit. Master Fu said that the Miraculous Hawkmoth owns is in the shape of a brooch. Marinette sees no such object on Damian, which could either mean that he’s not Hawkmoth or that he’s just been taking it off whenever he’s with her. She’s really hoping it’s not the second option.
She needs to gather her thoughts, make a plan on how to proceed. When she’s sure that Damian isn’t looking, Marinette sets off the ringtone that is saved for her Maman’s texts and calls. This catches Damian’s attention, and she waves looks up from her phone as though she’s responding.
“Maman wants me to do a delivery. If you’re looking for more information on the whole superhero situation in Paris, I can get you Alya’s number. She runs the Ladyblog-- I’m sure she’d be glad to talk with you.” Alya also has some of the worst conspiracy theories that Marinette has ever seen. She doesn’t often keep abreast of what the Ladyblog’s portrayal of Ladybug is, but back when Marinette and Alya were friends, she was subjected to wild theories that made her stomach nauseous with how little logic there was. Which means that if-- if-- Damian is actually Hawkmoth, he might be thrown off by what she says.
“I’ll see you on Monday? Jagged texted me last night and wants me to change the embroidery on his commission.” This isn’t exactly a lie; Jagged wants one of the smaller details to be changed, but it certainly won’t take as long as she’s suggesting. Marinette hopes that it’s enough of an excuse to get Damian off her back for the rest of today and tomorrow while she reevaluates her game plans and life choices.
Damian waves her off. “I don’t think that Ladyblogger girl knows anymore than I do. She’s of no help to me. I’ll see you on Monday.”
#
Marinette’s reaction to Damian’s questions are weird. There’s an underlying tension that she exuded before they parted ways, and he’s still thinking about it a day later.
Marinette, who he always finds near an akuma attack right after it occurs. Marinette, who is emotionally and physically superior to most other Parisians. Marinette, who hasn’t been akumatized in a class full of idiots and other victims. Marinette, who doesn’t like Ladybug even though she seems like a fairly competent and kind hero, despite the fact that she hasn’t caught Hawkmoth yet. Marinette, who rarely talks about akumas despite all of the time he spends with her, which is highly unusual because even people he only briefly meets manage to slip in something about akumas into the conversation. Damian feels like there must be some sort of connection between Marintte and the akuma situation that he’s not getting, but it’s eluding him.
He sits down with his laptop in his apartment and looks up information about Marinette Dupain-Cheng. She’s definitely just as talented as he suspected; in her ninth year of schooling, she won a Gabriel competition, participated in a music video of Clara Nightingale’s, and collaborated with Jagged Stone on an album cover. So that was how she met him-- he wondered, but never asked. There are also a few instagram posts that have tagged her as a good samaritan and a few articles that detail a small, asian girl who’s going around Paris helping random people that are in need.
The weird things that Damian finds are contained in her school records. She’s apparently in very good company with her IQ, but what’s more interesting is all the dates that she is tardy or absent from school. They line up perfectly with all of the dates that akumas appear. He feels dread gather in his stomach.
A few more searches seem to cement his growing suspicions. Around the same time that Marinette obtained a truce with Lila matched up with when theorists believed that the Italian girl started working with Hawkmoth. He reads the instagrams and tweets of her classmates from the first year that Hawkmoth arrived, which talk about how excellent Marinette is at calming them down and guiding them to a better place. He also reads the posts of Chloe Bourgeois and Alya Cesaire and the articles about Marinette and Evillustrator that tell a slightly different story-- that Marinette is capable of manipulating others into more unpleasant situations.
Damian jolts. There is an incoming call from his father.
“Are updates on Paris, Damian?”
Should he give them a clue to his growing suspicions that Marinette is Hawkmoth? No, he can’t tell them until he gathers more information.
“No,” he says. “Information about Hawkmoth and the Miraculous are hard to come by.”
There’s a sigh and what sounds like the rustling of papers from the other side. “I figured. Tim and Barbara can’t find anything over here, either, but the Justice League is worried. They want results.”
“The Justice League and I agreed that having Robin make an appearance would be beneficial. Gain Ladybug and Chat Noir’s trust, or find Hawkmoth. Information might come easier with your alter ego.”
“All right.”
Another pause. He and his father have always had an awkward relationship. Bruce didn’t know of his existence until he was ten, and by that time, the most formative years of Damian’s life had already passed. Bruce Wayne may be many things, but good at dealing with children, he is not. Even after adopting so many children, he doesn’t know how to raise a child. Damian and his brothers have all raised themselves, with Bruce only stepping in when one of them is really going off the rails.
“Is everything else going well in Paris? School is good?”
“School is fine.” Damian wonders whether he should tell his father about Marinette. About the girl who is kind and capable and scarily efficient at dispatching criminals for a citizen and-- he can’t think about her like that. He decides against telling his father about her. She might be Hawkmoth, after all, and confirming her existence to his father means that he’s denying that possibility. “Gotham?”
“Nothing out of the usual. A few run-ins with the Joker.”
Another silence. The lapses in conversation aren’t awkward, but Damian thinks of the playful banter Marinette has with her parents and frowns.
“Goodbye, Father.”
“Goodnight, Damian.”
Damian looks around at his empty apartment. There is nothing in it, except for his suitcase and a few pieces of furniture. It’s nothing like the manor, where he knows that Tim is up at all hours slaving away on another project that Damian rarely gets to see, or that Jason is in the training room with Dick joining him occasionally. He can’t pick a fight with Tim or have Dick try to mediate the conflicts between himself and Jason. No nightly patrols with three or four people talking over the comms, or near instantaneous backup when he gets into a tight spot. There is no Alfred or Barbara or Cassandra or Bruce here. Only Damian.
He looks down at his laptop, at the various information and images of Marinette that he has up on his screen. In good conscience, he can’t continue being friends with her. Not with the possibility that she is the person he’s trying to hunt down.
He remembers her saying that being lonely is different than being alone.
Damian is lonely.
#
Patrol is a necessary evil.
Ladybug doesn’t hate patrol. She’s not very fond of it, though. It cuts into time that she could be spending sleeping or designing or anything else, really. In the beginning, it started as a way to figure out how everything worked under the guise of the dark and without the constant threat of an akuma hanging over head. Then, it progressed into disproving the theory about Ladybug’s age, because civilians aren’t inclined to believe that a teenage girl who has school the next day would patrol every day in the early morning. Now, it shows the Parisians how devoted Ladybug is-- that’s something that she’s struggled with ever since withdrawing the Miraculous from all of the part time heroes-- and lets Marinette blow off any steam that she has.
Right now, Marinette needs to blow off a lot of steam. Still, even as Ladybug, as much as Marinette wants to scream to high hell and back about how she’s been friends-- very close friends, she’d dare to say-- with the same person who has been terrorizing Paris for years, she can’t. If she screams, there will be media coverage on it, and she doesn’t want to deal with what the press would write up some article about how Ladybug was overworked and needed to bring back the other heroes, or that Ladybug wasn’t mentally sound enough to take care of Paris, she should just give up the Miraculous, or that Ladybug’s scream was [insert some poetic nonsense that English teachers wax about for hours even though the author never intended the audience to read that deeply into it].
Marinette doesn’t want to admit it, but she’s gotten close to Damian. She’s as close to him as she is with Kagami, Luka, Jagged and Penny. Damian knows that she’s MDC. He knows her hopes and aspirations. He knows her family, knows the majority of her friends, and knows what’s important to her. It will be so easy for him to tear her apart now. Marinette isn’t sure what Hawkmoth is waiting for, but she almost hopes that he’ll get it over with sooner rather than later.
What will Hawkmoth do first? Go after the website that he helped her make, probably. Cut off the financial support that she could use to run away and create another identity. Then, he’ll go after her friends, few and far as they may be. Renee next. Her family, last. She wonders who Mayura is, if he is Hawkmoth. She hasn’t seen anyone that’s close to him. Then again, Damian reveals next to nothing about himself. She’s never even seen where he lives.
There’s a shadow on the rooftops.
God, of course Hawkmoth would send out an akuma today. He knows how horrible her mental state must be. There’s no way he wouldn’t take advantage of that.
She yoyos over to the shadow, not close enough to strike or apprehend, but close enough to easily give chase without the akuma being able to give her the slip.
“Ladybug,” the akuma says.
“Cut the crap. We all know you want the Miraculous, Hawkmoth. Let’s get to it.” The shadow steps forward where a street lamp illuminates its costume, and once again, she is assaulted by the barrage of colors on her eyes. After seeing how awful Damian’s color coordination was, it’s easy to come to terms with the awful designs of all of his costumes. Still, she’s surprised that the boy who dresses in the same outfit every day creates such outlandish costumes for all of his minions.
The akuma frowns, tenses.
“I’m not Hawkmoth,” it insists. “I’m Robin, a vigilante from Gotham. I’ve come to learn more about the current situation and aid you in taking Hawkmoth down.”
Ladybug scoffs. She’s not sure what this akuma’s tactic is, but none of the others have tried to lie to her so blatantly about their identity. And ripping off an identity? That is a new low, even for Hawkmoth. She’s sure that the real Robin didn’t agree to this, and if she were close with the vigilante, maybe she could get him to throw a lawsuit or two at Hawkmoth once he was in custody, just for kicks.
Robin the akuma scrambles, apparently looking for something that can verify his identity.
Ladybug strikes. There’s no pride in striking an opponent when they are distracted, but it’s a means to an end. If Damian is dumb enough to send out an akuma confused about its identity tonight of all nights-- a night where Ladybug is distressed and it would be all too easy to take advantage of her-- then she’s going to take advantage of it.
It’s easy to bind the akuma. Startlingly easy. The akuma is different tonight, then. His powers have something to do with close contact, maybe? Ladybug looks on his person for things that could be the point of akumatization, eyes flitting from Robin’s waistband to his mask.
She comes to an unpleasant conclusion. The measurements and the coloring are a perfect match. Hawkmoth has come to meet her in person.
“Damian,” Ladybug hisses.
Damian’s eyes widen, like he doesn’t know how she’s pieced together his identity. How stupid does he think she is? He’s been dropping hints constantly. Information a transfer to Paris shouldn’t know. Never telling Marinette anything personal. Always being near an akuma attack when it happens. It’s almost like he wanted her to figure out his identity.
“How did you know?”
“Please, Hawkmoth, did you really think that Marinette couldn’t connect the dots? You must have thought awfully little of her if you thought that your constant appearances near all of the akuma and questions about the Miraculous didn’t lead me to your identity.”
“Hawkmoth? Ladybug, I’m not Hawkmoth, I’m Robin.”
“And I’m the queen of England. Renounce your Miraculous now, Hawkmoth. Or I’ll beat you until you detransform and take it from you.”
Damian looks confused before his face contorts to an expression of resignation. He recognizes a cold fury in her eyes that is distinct to people who won’t give up until they get their way, and there’s really no other way around this right now. He should have brought his comm with him, but he wasn’t expecting to meet Ladybug tonight; he just wanted to assess the situation as Robin, to get out from his apartment for a second. Rookie mistake.
True to her word, Ladybug beats Damian unconscious and also until he’s black and blue. She’ll be lying if she didn’t say she took out some of her fury from the past years on him.
But here’s the thing; Damian doesn’t detransform. He stays in his god-awful costume that has the same disgusting shade of mustard yellow as that one top Damian owns. That’s not what’s supposed to happen. When Miraculous users faint, they detransform because it takes a sort of mental awareness to handle the powers bestowed upon them. Is it different because Damian is an akuma? Is there some sort of Miraculous bylaw that if a Miraculous user gets akumatized, they get to stay in their alternate form? Oh wait, that’s right, he’s an akuma, not Hawkmoth right now.
Ladybug stumbles forward, breaking all of the weapons that are on his belt, taking off his mask and breaking that as well. No akuma comes out. She tries his gloves, then his boots. She pats him down, seeing if there’s anything she missed. She rips his suit, too. Nothing. There’s no brooch in his personal effects either.
What is she supposed to do now?
Seeing no alternative, Ladybug picks Damian up and yoyos back to Tom and Sabine’s Boulangerie to safely detransform and figure out what the fuck is going on.
He’s not Hawkmoth, is the conclusion Marinette comes to after a side by side comparison of pictures of the vigilante and Damian. The horrifying conclusion: the person lying on the floor of her bedroom is actually Robin, the vigilante from Gotham.
Marinette knows it’s better to err on the side of caution, but she still buries her head in her hands in embarrassment. How can she have gotten him so wrong? She really needs to get better at reading people, because deciding that random civilians are Hawkmoth clearly has not paid off.
She also cannot believe that the Justice League has decided to step in now, and with a sidekick from America, of all things--Marinette is pretty sure that she sent the videos to the European branch. It must have been three years since her first notification to them. She contacted them immediately after Stoneheart, and again, after Syren when she was distraught at the death that surrounded her. With no response, there was nothing she could do. She has to start relying on herself and her own skills.
Ladybug only contacted them once more, after Heroes’ Day. At that point, Ladybug had been thinking for a while that someone who was naturally superpowered or someone with a high grade of intelligence-- like the heroes affiliated with the Justice League-- would do more harm than good if they were allowed in the city. After the devastation of her teammates being akumatized, and the nearly week long battle that ensued, she was certain that she could barely fight her teammates, let alone trained professionals. So with shaky hands and red rimmed eyes, she said to please disregard her earlier messages; the situation in Paris wasn’t that bad, and Ladybug could handle it.
Damian groans. Marinette jumps; he is waking up far earlier than she anticipated. She wants to transform back into Ladybug. Being in her spots gives her a pseudo sense of security. First, though, she has to restrain him. Even though he isn’t Hawkmoth, she’s not sure whether he’s a threat or not. She makes quick work of it, using the thickest zip ties that she has on hand and restraining his arms and legs.
She doesn’t get the chance to transform back into Ladybug, but that’s just as well, because at the end of the day, Marinette is the foundation of anything that makes Ladybug a hero to the public. Damian opens his eyes almost immediately after she has finished restraining him, taking in his surroundings and the person in front of him.
“Marinette? Where’s Ladybug?” No questions of how he got there; Ladybug can clearly carry her own weight and more. No questions as to why there are zip ties cutting into his wrists and ankles; he has seen too many of Marinette’s victims on the streets.
“What do you mean, where’s Ladybug?” Marinette is right in front of him. She might not have the suit on, but at the end of the day, she does have the Ladybug Miraculous, which means she’s Ladybug through and through, and Damian must know that. Otherwise, there’s no real reason for Robin to be spending so much time with Marinette. The fact that she feels more real and true to herself as Marinette than as Ladybug probably means nothing to him.
“She knocked me out on a rooftop. Didn’t know that you two knew each other personally. I’m not Hawkmoth, by the way.” He twitches, then realizes that he’s been tied up. “Why’d she leave me with you?”
So he doesn’t know that she’s also Ladybug? This whole thing keeps getting more confusing. Still, the less people that know about her alter ego, the better. Marinette will keep him in the dark. She attributes his blatant misunderstanding to the identity concealment magic of the Miraculous. It’s powerful stuff. If it didn’t exist, she’s sure she would have found concrete evidence as to who Hawkmoth is by now.
“She asked me to assess whether you were a threat or not. Whether or not she casts the Miraculous Cure is contingent on my response.”
“Ladybug wants you to assess whether I’m a threat or not? Why’d she leave a possible super villain with a civilian?”
“I help Ladybug out with many things.” Her voice turns to clinical detachment. She uses this method to dissociate as Ladybug when things get overwhelming. Assess the situation. Get in, deakumatize, get out. Marinette needs to distance herself. It’s bad enough that the situation is this convoluted, but she doesn’t need Damian to doubt Ladybug’s capabilities as well. “Ladybug knows that you’re not Hawkmoth now, and she knows that I can handle myself with any run of the mill bad guy, even if they are a supposed vigilante.”
“Tell me, Robin,” Marinette spits the name like a curse, “Why should I tell Ladybug that you’re not a threat? That you are who you say you are?”
In all honesty, all Marinette wants to do is knock Damian out again so she can collect her thoughts. She’s not sure how she should address his presence as Robin in Paris and is still reeling from the whiplash of thinking he was Hawkmoth only for him to turn into a foreign vigilante. Next thing she knows, he’ll tell her that his name isn’t even Damian Grayson. Well, now that she thinks about it, he’s definitely not. After this encounter finishes, she’ll look up Damian and Gotham and see what she gets.
He looks flustered, like he never expected anybody to question his identity or presence. It’s laughable, really. Marinette doubts that the Justice League actually sent him; he’s probably here to explore on his own. That means he’ll only be a pain in the ass to deal with. Maybe she needs to get into contact with the Justice League again, if only just so she can deport Robin with more ease.
“I can call Batman,” he says.
Marinette doesn’t think this is a very good solution. There’s no way for her to prove that the person on the other side actually is Batman and not some actor. But after racking her brain, she can’t come up with a much better solution. It’s not like Robin has any superpowers that she can request to see, and she doesn’t have a direct line to anybody from the Justice League.
“Fine. Call Batman.”
“It’s in the pocket near on my right side.” Marinette doesn’t bother going closer to him. She destroyed everything on him earlier, in case it was the akuma’s vessel. Ladybug thought she came across a phone, but now she’s glad she smashed it and left it on that random rooftop. He probably has some sort of tracker on his phone. In any case, Marinette thinks it’s weird for a vigilante to have a phone on them while on the rooftops. Shouldn’t he have an earpiece or something?
“Your phone was destroyed by Ladybug. Tell me the number to call. I’ll put it on speaker.” Marinette isn’t sure if the number he’ll have her call will be some sort of secure connection or direct line that is only accessible through Damian’s phone, but she doesn’t particularly care because the Miraculous Communicators are exactly that. Miraculous. Master Fu assured her that all communications were private and impossible to crack unless they also had a Miraculous. Which is why she’s using the Miraculous Communicator to call Batman.
Damian winces, then speaks into the offered phone.
“Batman, it’s Robin. I need to verify my identity in order to proceed.”
“Are you with Ladybug?”
So he is on a mission, then, and not just playing hooky. If Batman is involved, Marinette has no doubt the rest of the Justice League will follow soon. This will be a dreadfully unpleasant call.
“I’m making it a video call,” Marinette says. “And no, he’s not with Ladybug. I’m Ladybug’s point of contact, and she doesn’t take kindly to people encroaching on her territory without permission.”
“Robin, what happened?” Batman isn’t accepting her video request.
Marinette cuts off whatever Damian is about to say. “Damian was suspicious; I reported his activities to Ladybug and she believed that he could be Hawkmoth. Then, she caught him on the roofs and took him back to my place after verifying that he wasn’t Hawkmoth. Video call, Batman. I’d like to see that you are who you say you are, before I send Robin back to the states.”
“She knows your civilian identity? Two people know that you’re Robin?”
“Turn your video on. If you can’t prove that you are who Damian says you are, Ladybug and I will do everything in our powers to deport him and make sure that the Justice League is not allowed in Paris again. Ladybug said that she doesn’t need any unknowns in her city, and I’ve been hoping Robin came here of his own volition. It sounds like that isn’t the case.”
Marinette thinks that Batman curses in English, but she’s not sure. Fluent though Marinette may be, she is not well versed in curses, colloquialisms, or American memes. The camera turns on. It’s Batman, or at the very least, an actor wearing a very good knock off costume.
It’s annoying that Marinette can’t see his eyes. There’s some white film where his eyes should be, and the fact that his cowl covers more than half of his face isn’t doing her any favors in letting her read his facial expression. She moves herself so that Batman can see both her and Robin.
“Why is Robin restrained?”
“Like I said: he was suspicious. I’m not taking any chances.”
A moment of silence.
“How do you want me to prove my identity?”
That’s good. He’s not asking who she is, though she’s sure that there are cameras pointing at the screen on Batman’s end, running facial analysis and background checks on her. The Miraculous magic will ensure that any connections between her and Ladybug will not come to light. Other than her identity as Ladybug, Marinette has nothing to hide.
“If you’re Batman, then you should have access to the League’s calls, European and otherwise. Play me the last video that Ladybug sent you. I know what she said.” She spares a glance at Damian. His jaw is tight, but when he looks at her, she finds what looks like regret. It’s not entirely Damian’s fault. A mission is a responsibility, and Marinette understands that in order to be a hero or vigilante, one must be willing to do anything to accomplish the mission. Really, she’s only Ladybug because she feels that heavy weight of the words duty and responsibility on her shoulders. Fu’s fault.
“Behave. If you try something, I’ll knock you out.” Marinette sets the communicator on her desk and eyes him. The zipties are so tight around his arms and legs that he is bleeding. Marinette feels a flash of sympathy, then pushes it away. It was his fault for-- why was he at fault, again?
“I have the video.” Batman sounds even peakier than when they started the call. He plays the video.
“Justice League. This is Ladybug. I rescind my requests for help; I can take care of Paris with my own team. Any help from you at this point would be a detriment and could potentially harm the citizens of Paris. Hawkmoth manipulates strong emotions, and I don’t need to handle a metahuman or tactical genius to gain more power to wreak havoc on my city. I will not contact you with any further requests for assistance.”
It’s an awful video. Marinette had to wait a day after the Heroes’ week fiasco just so her eyes wouldn’t be red. At least her voice doesn’t waver in it. There’s a conviction in the whole video that was unique to that moment.
Marinette looks at Batman, then at Robin.
“Clearly the Justice League refused to listen. Ladybug doesn’t want or need your help at this point in time. Why are you here?”
“The Justice League is at fault for not paying attention to Ladybug’s other videos. But Mayor Bourgeois and President Macron can only cover such alarming incidents for so long. Ladybug and her… team clearly need help in order to find and take down Hawkmoth, so once the American branch of the Justice League found out half a year ago, we started to investigate.” Batman speaks in lieu of Damian. Marinette briefly wonders if Damian knows who Batman is under the mask. She bets he does. They’re probably close, what with how worried Batman sounds.
“What makes you think that the Justice League is any better equipped to handle this situation? Ladybug and her team have been fighting for the past three years and resolved every akuma with no help from you. She needed your help in earlier years. Now she doesn’t.”
“Exactly; it’s been three years and she still hasn’t caught Hawkmoth.”
“You say that like the Justice League doesn’t have a team with more wealth and manpower than Ladybug does that’s been looking into Hawkmoth and the Miraculous for the past half year and clearly has not found any reasonable leads. Ladybug has only been actively looking for Hawkmoth for the past two years, not three. The police handled the first year, not that you’ve done any homework on the situation. Thought that a field agent would help your chances?”
There is fire in Marinette’s stomach. Batman sounds so dismissive of all of the work that she’s been doing. It’s been hard on her; she doesn’t have the support that she needs and doesn’t have the experience or expertise to hunt down Hawkmoth on her own. She trained briefly under Master Fu to learn spells and ways to expand her powers as Ladybug, but that was an equivalent exchange: she no longer trusts that other holders won’t be akumatized. Her growing cynicism and physical training from Maman came at the expense of Chat Noir; after the whole Lila incident in her first year as Ladybug, she found out that Chat Noir and Adrien were one and the same. And Gabriel Agreste is not afraid to use his son until Adrien is stretched far too thin, which forced Marinette to nearly bench her partner.
“Three years,” Batman says again.
“If the Justice League can’t figure it out nearly unlimited resources and funding in half a year-- both ordinary and super human-- then clearly it isn’t a question of time. It’s a question of capability. Get off your high horse, Batman. You haven’t given me any reasons why Ladybug and I shouldn’t deport Robin here, and you’re definitely not making a good case as to why she shouldn’t go to Mayor Bourgeois and France’s president to ensure that the Justice League and its affiliates and ban hero travel into Paris. Bourgeois already doesn’t want information on it’s supervillain situation to get out.”
“Marinette,” Damian pleads.
As Robin and as Damian, he doesn’t pose a threat. He hasn’t been helpful, but he certainly hasn’t messed with the status quo for the month that he’s been here. Still, he is a liability. If he stays in Paris, he is the gateway for the other members of the Justice League to fly in and try to commandeer the fragile balance that she has found. She can’t afford for something like that to happen.
“You’re not any better, Robin. Why did you even hang around me? Thought I was a threat?” Her eyes narrow in realization. It makes sense why he decided to hang out with her, despite his initial cold front. He was playing a role.“You thought I was Hawkmoth.”
His silence is an agreement.
“We just want to help,” Damian says, and against her better judgement, Marinette believes him.
Her shoulders round, and Marinette sighs. She can’t truly begrudge Damian for that train of thought, not when she believed the same about him. She’s been a little harsh on them so far, in part due to old resentment that they never responded to her in that first, awful year when she needed the help.
There’s a dull tiredness that comes with knowing someone who she considered one of her closest friends suspected her of being a supervillain, though she did believe the same of him, so maybe they’re even. It still hurts, though. It hurts like when Alya decided that Marinette was mean-hearted enough to stop the members of their class from reaching their full potential. It hurts like when Marinette finally realized that she couldn’t repair their friendship, not to what it used to be. It hurts like when she looked around the classroom and realized that she couldn’t talk to anyone there. It hurts like when Marinette decided that she couldn’t risk helping her friends the way she wanted to.
“What kind of help can you offer us? We don’t need any more of you to come out here.” Resources are nice. More money to fund therapy programs around town won’t hurt. Master Fu doesn’t help on that part. Really, he doesn’t help at all. Even though she has Chat Noir and had a team, she often feels like it’s herself against the world. Some days, she reaches up to her earrings and feels an aching emptiness, like there’s something more to the Miraculous that’s been sealed away.
“We can give you resources. Money, connections, experience. Robin is good with technology. He can help you track down where Hawkmoth is.”
Marinette’s laugh is bitter. “Sure, he can try, but the butterflies Hawkmoth sends out aren’t visible by the normal human eye or electronically until they’ve found their mark. Once they’re purified, they’re just normal butterflies, and they go off in random directions.”
“Normal human eye? It sounds like there are exceptions.” Damian readjusts himself. He has fidgeted his way into an uncomfortable looking seiza position, where his ankles are bleeding.
“A true holder can see the butterflies at all times.”
Marinette also decides to throw them a bone so there’s no questions as to why a mere civilian is working with Ladybug. “That’s why Ladybug recruited me. I was Multimouse.”
Multimouse was in the file that Damian sent his father, but he asks, just to make sure. “The one that can split itself?”
“That’s correct. I guess now is as good a time as any for the two of you to get your questions answered.”
“Why are you the point of civilian contact instead of any of the other more frequently used heroes? Didn’t you appear only once?” Damian avoids looking Marinette in the eyes, and that makes her feel slightly better. He’s ashamed of his actions. Good.
“Ladybug said that the other hero’s civilian forms were either compromised or not in a good position.”
“Ladybug knows who all the holders are.” Batman speculates. He looks less tense now that Damian is no longer tied up, but his voice remains gravelly and distrubed. Maybe that’s what he sounds like all the time. “Who else knows? Do you?”
“Only Ladybug knows.” Marinette lives in half truths. She’s not sure that they’re much better than lies, but they’re all she has. Secrecy is the only thing Master Fu has sincerely taught her.
“Why have all the other heroes disappeared?”
“Ladybug said that it was too dangerous for someone who could be akumatized to hold a Miraculous. Rena Rage, Shell Shock, Queen Wasp-- they were all frighteningly powerful akumas. It’s also why Chat Noir has been showing up less and less; his home life is not the best, and she’s trying her best to ensure that he doesn’t get akumatized.”
“She’s not worried for herself or,” Damian’s eyes flick to Marinette, away from Batman. “For you?”
“She knows that both of us are good at dealing with stress. We have our own methods of coping.” She looks at Damian, her mouth tightening into a frown. “If you want to stay in Paris, I’ll cut you a deal. We can work together for two weeks, and if we don’t get any results, you have to leave and the Justice League must promise that they won’t interfere again.”
“Two weeks isn’t enough time,” Damian objects.
“If you don’t think it’s enough time, just leave now. I’ll say now that I’m only willing to work with you during the night. That’s the time I work on Miraculous related stuff now, anyways. And stay out of the akuma battles.” She doesn’t actually think that working together will help anyways, and she wants Damian gone sooner rather than later. He’s been making her feel too much and emotions that are far more explosive and easy to take advantage of than Marinette has in a long time. She doesn’t want to be targeted by an akuma because of her inner conflict.
“Two weeks, then,” Batman agrees. “Robin can contact me if you need any extra resources.”
Marinette hangs up and assesses Damian. He looks almost pitiful, with bruising around his eyes, tousled hair, a ripped suit, and cuts where his skin is exposed. She opens her trap door in a clear gesture for him to depart. Downstairs is dark; her Maman and Papa have long since gone to sleep, and it’s only a few more hours until they wake up to start baking. “We start tomorrow. If you need Ladybug for anything, tell me.”
He’s half way down the ladder when he looks back up at Marinette, into her eyes.
“I’m sorry,” he says.
Marinette can’t breath. She feels like vomiting. His eyes are so green in comparison to the purple bruising on his face. She did that to him. She made him look that way. All she’s ever wanted to do as Ladybug is protect the people she cared for. But Damian-- Marinette doesn’t know. She doesn't know whether what Damian has done can actually be described as bad. He was just trying to do what Batman told him to do. Keeping an eye on a threat. Marinette wonders how long he thought she was Hawkmoth. She wonders if he ever thought they were friends.
“I’m sorry too,” Marinette says, and shuts the trap door.
They’re both sorry for very different things.
#miraculous ladybug#dcu#mlb x dc#maribat#daminette#batfam#jason todd#bruce wayne#dick grayso#barbara gordon#sbgs#original content#adrien agreste#lila rossi#marinette dupain cheng#damian wayne
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Turtle,,? (For the ask meme)
for this ask meme!
Sexuality Headcanon: oh you know he is a fruit
Gender Headcanon: hits turtle with beam of turns you transgender. i really like the dynamic of trans character in monarchys where its discussed if they just did it to avoid responsibility but id like to emphasize that if you do that plot point uhm please be trans and also no people do not become trans for leverage, ever. i also think hed probably get into some mogai gender [affectionate] like identifying with moss or something
A ship I have with said character: listen listen listen. turtle x winter. like there is little canon establishment for it but i like the headcanons that can tumble out of my shitty little brain for this. like theyre both royals and of all the characters winter is less mean to turtle because hes quiet, like he thinks that turtle is weird and acts improper but i think thered be a lot of good royalty discussion between the two of them and arguing gently about the ethics of the situations theyre in. i think that in a relationship turtle needs someone who is gentle that he can confide in, he loves the jade winglet for being exciting and getting him out of his shell which he DID need but getting active and out there is a lot of work and id think itd be best for him to have someone he can just settle beside and not have to worry about doing too much with. comfort! i think that by arc 3 winter would be more understanding of turtle and more willing to help him in a way that would help himself, like they both realize looking at each other theyve got issues in the same ways and that addressing the others issues will help them address their own. but they do it all slowly at a gentle pace. i just think the both of them need someone gentle who doesnt shove them out of their comfort zone.
A BROTP I have with said character: TURTLE AND PERIL FOREVER BABY!!!!!! they get each other out of their comfort zones, either to do more or less... but theyre only good in hour increments together or else turtle gets too stressed or peril gets too excited </3
A NOTP I have with said character: turtle and kinkajou, again nothing really wrong with it i just dont see anything between them and i like it when characters are gay. i understand the peppy/hesitant dynamic but i cant help but feel like turtle would either be too in awe or too hesitant for it to be good for him. and i just dont like school children dating. sorry. also i fucking fucking HATE peril x turtle considering that by arc 3 turtle is 5 and peril is EIGHT!! she is a young adult. also again the thing i said before about someone who is too feisty would probably be more uncomfortable than exciting for him, plus she is so dense that i think if they ever got into a relationship theyd have soo many issues between one of them having lived almost twice as long as the other, perils intensive frightening backstory and continual issues into her adulthood, and turtle still being highly traumatized from neglect. theyd get problems with each other and then never address it and peril would just get madder at shit turtle does that she wont address and turtle will jsut get more frightened at peril about shit he wont address. bad chemistry
A random headcanon: i think turtle would love painting. painting is just visual writing! i think hed love making dramatic scenes with abstract imagery and then get upset when others dont understand the symbolism hes put into it and the emotion and story behind what hes drawn, like “oh you cant see in his eyes that hes just lost his lover which has parallels to him losing everything hes had before, killing him inside, but now in this instance he has learned strength where previously he froze up and is seeing this as symbolic vengence for his former failure, stressed in his pose and tensed muscles? the bubbles represent the loss of innocence and i havent drawn any eyeshine to show hes lost everything. i cant believe you dont understand my work” but he loves info dumping about his work to his friends. they all sit around him and clap while he talks about some insane bullshit.
General Opinion over said character: i love this guy hes literally one of my favorites. i think that hes written a bit too mysterious and suave in book 6 where in talons of power it turns out hes just a weepy baby, but i love weepy baby insecure turtle, even if the turn is weird and his previous behavior seems ooc. its believable. i think turtle deserves better.
THE DANGEROUS GIFT SPOILERS BELOW
am i going insane or is turtle just NOT in the dangerous gift? never mentioned even once? like where did he go. what happened to him. did he get lost at see or some shit? tsunami comes up like “i can tell you about pantala, i was there! yep, i was the only one” like BITCH WHERE IS YOUR BROTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!
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