#honestly the most fascinating thing for me would be seeing what happens when she has the opportunity to meet other Commanders
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listening to my Tideturners playlist was a mistake because I am having SO many feelings about the Sidewinder again.
she's not just any AU of Mai Trin; she's a version who's endured the absolute worst case scenario and lives every day in fear of losing everything all over again. but her story flips the entire narrative of Guild Wars 2 on its head; it's all a matter of perspective, and hers comes from an entirely different angle than we're used to.
what is a monster? as they say, to a bird, a cat is a monster.
the Sidewinder's monster is the Commander.
the first Commander she ever met was a tyrant who set the world on fire just to watch it burn. nothing could stop his rampage until there was nothing left to destroy. he made Scarlet Briar's war look like a playground scuffle; in fact, he did it by killing her and seizing her army to do it with. the Sidewinder doesn't have to wonder what a rogue Commander is capable of at their worst. she KNOWS.
and she also knows that if even a single one knew about her outpost, about her, about her people, and decided they were a threat to get rid of, there's absolutely nothing she could do to stop them. the most she could hope to do is be enough of a speed bump that the rest of the Turnabout can escape and make her sacrifice worthwhile.
she's spent decades building up a new world, a new society, and a new identity-- and in a split second a single person could bring it all crashing down. that absolutely terrifies her. it's all so fragile.
a major part of the Sidewinder's personal arc has to do with overcoming that dread to find common ground. because, truth-be-told, much as she'd insist otherwise? she's not so different from the Commander herself. she's fought long and hard to become someone worthy of the trust and respect that so many refugees from so many, many different worlds have placed on her. it's not enough to have it, she wants to DESERVE it. and even if she'd claim she's not there yet, most would agree she's succeeded. she's the beating heart of the Turnabout; none of it would exist without her. she's given all of them the hope that the heroes of their own worlds couldn't.
Mai Trin never wanted to be a leader or a hero or a politician. but as the Sidewinder, she's become all three out of necessity. she had no other choice. no one else was left alive to do it in her place.
so she puts on her mask, and she steps onto the stage, and she talks big, but deep down she knows that if the worst case scenario came back, there was nothing she could do to protect them, not on her own. the only thing that might stand a chance is another Commander, and is she really prepared to take a risk like that? is she willing to put it all on the line to fight for a future without fear?
and even if they are the right choice, even if they do agree to help in spite of it all... can she put one of the last good people at risk, knowing just what horrors they'd be up against? facing someone who's killed others like them a hundred times over, allowing them no rest even in death as their shambling corpses are conscripted into his undead army? how can she, in good conscience, expect anyone to face something so horrific with stakes as high as THAT? which is worse; that they turn against her, or that they trust her and die, adding another force of nature to their enemies' ranks? the Sidewinder doesn't know the answer to that question, if there is one.
there's so much weight on every choice she must make, and the consequences of every wrong move are unfathomable. she might not be the Commander, but that, at least, is one thing they have in common. the decisions they make will decide who lives and who dies.
all the Sidewinder can hope is that when she finally does make that leap of faith, she'll be ready to handle whatever results lay in store.
#my posts#the Sidewinder#Tideturners AU#i won't put this in the main tags because it's just me rambling incoherently and having Emotions but i just needed to Yell#honestly the most fascinating thing for me would be seeing what happens when she has the opportunity to meet other Commanders#specifically: ones that aren't crazed megalomaniacs like hers was! Ruju is SUCH a piece of work i need to talk about him someday#tbh if/when i actually put together a Tideturners RP group the first event would be a Commander gathering where she's trying to reach out#because she needs to! she KNOWS she needs to! but god there are SO many reasons that she doesn't. this woman has SO much trauma#any interaction between her and a Commander is bound to be interesting though regardless of whether they recognize her#because in both scenarios you'll get ENTIRELY different results... for better and for worse because Hoo Boy#if they don't: she'll just try to play it cool but she's so freaking nervous and is trying so hard to make a good impression#but she's still Mai Freaking Trin which means she's going to be a bit on the snarky side and definitely rough around the edges#and if they DO recognize her? how to give the Sidewinder a heart attack in one easy step. she'd freeze up IMMEDIATELY#like funnily enough she'd literally respond better to an AU Scarlet recognizing her because she Knows Scarlet#Commanders meanwhile are wildcards that can also be insanely destructive and dangerous and weren't always on great terms with Mai#and like. she knows that! she knows full well what her Reputation is elsewhere even if she left her version of the Alliance early#so while she didn't participate in like Any of that (Scarlet was already dead EARLY) she knows they won't know that#like. man. she's just fascinating to think about in terms of how she fits into everything because of what a mess she is#sidenote probably the saddest thing would be if she met a Commander who was a version of one she'd seen before#specifically: one that died holding off Ruju to let their timeline escape from him. that'd earn her trust immediately#though she'd feel SO bad about it and be very weirdly resistant to them facing Ruju directly (she already let them die once...)#I'm just. augh. all the thoughts tonight. explodes
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Hello, darling.
To the female human reader, she is Jake's girlfriend. She realizes that jake is moving away from her, he behaves colder, he avoids her and when they sleep together he doesn't even hug her and when she tries to hug him he pushes her away. One day she confronts him and Jake tells her that he is in love with Neytiri or something.
I hope you understand, english is not my first language.
Thank you.
ANONNNNN i asked for angst and you gave it your all omg 😭 thank you for the request bby! i'm not entirely happy with how i wrote this but hopefully that's just me being in my own head 🫠
also why is sam worthington so FINE like wow the brain rot is real
all good things come to an end ✧ jake sully
°˖➴ warnings: fem human reader, scientist!reader, young!jake, human!jake, break up, just angsty tbh
you had first met jake years ago through his brother; you and tommy were both scientists and prepared to head to pandora soon to evolve your studies with dr. augustine. upon meeting jake you instantly fell in love, he was so humorous yet also a kind soul, something that you had craved your whole life. it wasn't long before you two became an item, spending every moment together. when tommy died you were both devastated in several ways, and you had wondered what would happen with tommy's avatar and the status of your anticipated trip to pandora. luckily, jake was easily convinced into taking over tommy's spot to fulfill the study. which brings you to today, 2154, in pandora. it was amazing to reunite with jake after cryo, and you were excited that he could now be apart of this with you.
it was another day and jake had just come back from his day in his avatar body, he seemed to have been spending more and more time in his avatar and out in the village. it didn't bother you, you figured he was just becoming fascinated and was pleased to have working legs again after such a long time. you smiled at him as he moved in your direction in his wheelchair, "hey, honey" you leaned down to kiss him and he turned his head, resulting in the kiss landing on his cheek. your smile faltered slightly, but nonetheless you shook it off to continue talking with him. "day good? see anything interesting out there?" you run your fingers through his hair as you await an answer, "yeah, good, was fun" he says before wheeling away to talk with norm. your heart felt as though it was being ripped apart slowly, slightly unsure of what jake's attitude was all about. you've seen his bad days, many of them, but he never denied your touch nor spoke to you so indifferently. this wasn't the first time he has done this since you've been in pandora, but you thought he was just adjusting, maybe feeling frustrated? you honestly felt like you were just making shit up to excuse how he was acting and make yourself feel better.
once you got into bed waiting for jake, your heart raced as you wondered if he would still be acting the same. your head was hurting as you pondered all the possible scenarios, and you just couldn't put a finger on what might be wrong. you watched as jake rolled into the room, shutting the door behind him and pulling up beside the bed. you heard him sigh before lifting himself into bed and slipping in the free space beside you. he simply pulled the blanket up over himself, not turning towards you or touching you or even uttering a short 'goodnight'. you hesitantly decided to wrap your arm around him from behind, hoping he would accept the touch. you suddenly felt as though you were walking on eggshells, wary of what might happen next. your arm snakes around him, and within seconds jake is nudging it away. you couldn't stop the tears that rolled down your cheeks, feeling utterly rejected by the man you loved most. what did you do wrong? did you say something to upset him? did he find someone else?
your eyes fluttered open to jake causing a bit of a ruckus in your room, changing his shirt hurriedly. he notices that your eyes are open and decides to speak to you for the first time in 10-12 hours, "hurry, i wanna get in early today". you audibly sigh and sit up, headache already present from the crying you did in the night and lack of sleep. "jake.." you whisper, dying to know what's been going on. "what's going on with you? you barely speak to me anymore and you don't even let me touch you. you are my boyfriend, you're supposed to be loving me and telling me if i've done something wrong. what is it? just tell me so i can get some fucking sleep at night..." you trail off and sniffle, throwing the blankets off of you and scooching to the edge of the bed to face him in his wheelchair. you scan his face as he doesn't say a word though he looks distraught. "tell me, please-" "i found someone else... i- i'm in love with neytiri, eytukan's daughter".
there it was. it stung. it stung so bad. you nod and look down to your lap, seeing the tears darken your light blue pyjama pants. "i didn't know how to tell you, and it just... happened. i never expected it to happen, but it did... i'm so sorry" he observes you with your head down, feeling horrible yet also feeling as though a weight has been lifted off of his shoulders. "you have been nothing but amazing to me; patient and loving and genuine, but my heart has chose someone else", you let out a quiet sob as you listen to his words, finally understanding. you start to remember how desperate he was to learn na'vi, how he started to hum a certain song chord you had never heard before, how he spoke about neytiri with such grace; it made sense. "i get it, jake. please just- please go.." you whimper, lazily gesturing your hand to the door. "i'm sorry..." he whispers before wheeling towards the door and exiting, leaving you on your own. your sobs become louder the second the door latches, head pounding. you had no idea what to do next, how could you work with jake around? with jake around talking about his new love, the one he chose over you. maybe all good things do come to an end, and maybe you'd just have to live with that fact.
#avatar#avatar 2009#atwow#avatar masterlist#avatar fluff#avatar fic#avatar smut#atwow fic#jake sully#neteyam#atwow smut#atwow fluff#atwow angst#avatar angst#jake sully fic#jake sully smut#jake sully angst#jake sully fluff#neteyam fic#lo'ak fic#lo'ak#atwow masterlist#avatar the way of water
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OH MY GOD I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN JOHNNY COMES BACK FROM HIS TRIP AND DID Y/N CALL JAEHYUN BACK THE NEXT DAY????? YOUR STORIES KEEP ME ALIVE SRSLY
The Cost of Hindsight
The drabble before this answered your other question. I hope you like this, I would love to know what you think! Honestly, I think my rigour as a writer comes back in such full force when you guys just talk to me, I think it makes me feel like I am actually writing for someone and not just sending these out into space. So thanks for the awesome compliment you put in there too!
Feedback is always appreciated!
_
Summary: (Y/N) surprises Johnny at the airport, Mark senses something between them. Later, Johnny reminisces on the past, making a surprising confession. (I re-wrote this 8 times and it still ended up sounding like a tv guide synopsis for a cable episode)
Warnings: Smut, Riding, dirty talking, humiliation kink, hair pulling (Johnny has a thing for hair in this one).
WC: 3.8k
Mini Masterlist
(Y/N) had been waiting with Mark for Johnny to arrive for upwards of two hours by now. His flight was delayed, causing the wait to be turned out to be longer than expected. With nothing else to do, the two most unlikely companions turned to small talk.
Mark talked about his job, how he was on the fence about investing in Jaemin’s company, and about his desire to get a pet dog. They were so deep in conversation that she didn’t notice how fast time had passed. Only when Mark’s phone rang did it occur that Johnny had probably landed.
“He just picked up his bags. On his way.” Mark spoke as he put his phone back in his pocket.
It was at that moment when (Y/N) started feeling a hint of nerves.
When Mark asked her to come along to pick Johnny up, she thought it could be a cute surprise. Now she wondered if she had maybe overstepped, walking into a situation she wasn’t invited to. Johnny had asked Mark to come pick him up, not her.
She didn’t even get the time to linger on the thought, much less rationalise it. Mark raised his arm, waving at the entrance.
She turned, lifting herself on her toes to search for him in the crowd, then immediately deciding to cower. Would he really find it weird, or would it just be a fun surprise like Mark had told her? She pushed her thoughts aside when she finally spotted him.
Johnny spotted Mark first, his lost eyes crinkling into a smile as he pulled his hand out of his jacket to wave. When Mark’s gaze moved over his own shoulder, Johnny’s followed. He did a double take, squinting like he was making sure he was seeing correctly.
When he was certain, his first response was surprise. A disgruntled person knocked into Johnny’s knees with a trolley. She winced the same time Johnny jumped.
That must have hurt.
He mumbled a quick apology despite being the innocent victim in the exchange, turning to look at her again and once again squinting like he still wasn't sure. Then he smiled in a way that radiated from the distance, through the large crowd and considerable distance that stood between them. It made her forget everything in that moment.
There were, seemingly, two distinct sides of Johnny that she'd witnessed. Like a switch that could be flipped when the occasion calls for it.
He could go from being a fun, teasing friend of almost juvenile proportions, to the most indecent yet attentive lover.
Johnny was the kind of man who put his hand behind her head when she reached for things in cupboards before joking about how clumsy she could be. Yet he was also the one shoving her against the first wall he could find when the switch flipped.
They were easy to tell apart as well, so different were these two sides. Somehow both him and not, the same Johnny who had the most gentle disposition was also the one who had the most debaucherous words and a deliciously rough touch. They were opposing sides that somehow only made sense with him. She was equally fascinated by both.
What baffled her was that it was hard to tell when he chose to flip the switch. And it made it hard to figure out when she was meant to be a friend to him and when something else.
There were moments when Johnny would do the most endearing thing while he was being a friend. Like when he breaks off a piece of anything new he’s eating and hands it over without her asking, the time he tried to make fluffy pancakes for breakfast and overheated his stand mixer. Or all the times he quietly paid for her half of dinner when her budget was tight at the end of a month. Such moments would be so dear that she'd want nothing more than to kiss him then and there, especially because he seemingly did it without a thought. But it was difficult to tell if that crossed one of the many steep boundaries they regularly traversed.
It was easier around people. Outside the confines of their private spaces, amongst others, they maintained their dynamic easily. As Johnny always reiterated, they were friends first. Good friends who didn't need to try too hard at all to act like it.
But when alone, (Y/N) found herself looking for a sign from him before she could shift into the other side of their relationship. The one where she could tilt over and kiss him because Johnny remembered to stock her favourite cookies before she came over for the weekend.
But there were some confusing moments when this shift sometimes happened in a crowd. Those were the moments that edged on madness. Where the two distinct sides of their friendship melted into one brief look, so ready to risk being discovered just for reassurance. To remind themselves of their little secret, confirm its existence. Like on the night Irene and Taeil announced their engadement, or the time Johnny was a little too drunk and Hyuk’s simple question about where he learned to cook turned into a long ode to (Y/N)’s patience and perserverence.
It was also exactly how she felt right now.
The moment their eyes met across the airport exit, the world around them disappeared. The loud chaos of the terminal dissolved away and what mattered was the look in his eyes, the curve of his lips.
He was happy to see her, beaming while his gaze remained unwavering on her face. As he walked closer, she could see the colours shift in his gaze. Something softer blurred the edges of his gaze and she could tell what he was trying to say.
He missed her.
She hoped that her eyes told him the same. But she doubted one look could ever word the intensity of her sentiment. She wasn’t sure if words could either. Her chest seemingly tugged, urging to drift towards him. Perhaps no words, look or gesture she had the capacity for could ever express how Johnny made her feel.
Or the way she felt about him.
“Hi.” He came and stood in front of her, lips pursed like he was failing to hide his grin, “What a pleasant surprise.”
“I couldn’t wait to see you.” The words slipped out, forgetting the place, the circumstances, and the company. She bit down on her bottom lip. Johnny’s cheeks turned a dark red, biting the corner of his mouth.
“I’m still here.” Mark laughed awkwardly.
The words reminded her of where they were. She had made a mistake, confusing the two sides.
“You didn’t tell me you were bringing (Y/N).” Johnny turned away, looking unfazed. She wished she was as good as him at this.
“Yeah, I thought it would be a nice surprise.” Mark looked between them, eyes full of contemplation.
“It is.” Johnny smiled, walking up to give Mark a hug. “Thanks for bringing my car. I’ll drop you home.” He patted his back, “Both of you.” He turned back to her, both of them laughing awkwardly. Sometimes Johnny slipped too, forgetting the two sides.
Those were perhaps the moments when she lost her mind the most.
_
She squeezed her arms tighter around Johnny’s neck, breath shallow.
"How does it feel?" Johnny questioned, tone patronising. He reached up, pushing the hair back that was sticking to her face, gripping down at the hair at the base of her neck.
“Do you like controlling the pace?” He cooed at her, tone mocking.
Her lips parted, only a gasp leaving them when he bucked his hips up to meet her halfway. An attempt to make her words harder to conjure.
"Hmm?" He questioned, pulling her head back with his secure hold. "Do you like it?" He hummed with a softer tone, opening his palm for her to nuzzle into. “You were riding your pillow so well just yesterday, what happened? Can you only be a slut on camera?” He cooed.
She squeezed her eyes, the words making a wash of humiliation trickle down till it settled between her legs.
“You were supposed to get it for me weren’t you? The pillow? What happened?” He asked, patting her cheek to get her attention. “Did you keep the cover for me like I asked?”
She whined, cheeks flushing at his filthy words. Her hand left his neck to push him, silently begging him to stop.
Johnny laughed, “You were being so bold on our call? What happened? Why are you suddenly pretending like you weren't the one begging to hear these words last night?”
Her hips moved faster, spurred on by his taunts.
“Will you do it for me again? Ride your pillow in front of me this time?” He asked. She shook her head vehemently, forehead knitting in distress. “Why not?” He laughed, dragging his nails through her scalp before fixing his hands on her waist, assisting her glide.
“It’s embarrassing.” She managed to get the words out with a struggle. The next moment she bit down on her bottom lip, Johnny’s arms finally making her move in the right way. “Why do you enjoy embarrassing me?” She whined again.
“Considering the way you’ve been clenching around me, Peanut. I should ask you why you enjoy being embarrassed.” She hid her head in his neck, Johnny chuckling at the act.
“I do not.” She huffed.
“Do too.” He responded, thrusting his pelvis up to meet her halfway.
“Shit, I’m going to come.” She clawed at his back, “Johnny.” She urged, digging her face deeper into his neck.
He shushed her, “I’ve got you.” His reassuring voice matched his rhythm, fingers tightening on her waist.
"I know." She panted, her insides clenching down tight. Johnny groaned, moving his hips up in search of his own high.
Johnny came first, his grip on her waist tightening as he rammed into her as hard as he could from below. The erratic thrusts send her off too, biting down on his shoulder as she came crashing down.
They sat there in silence, pants turned to shallow breaths. "Did you miss me?" Johnny asked, hands sliding up her back.
"Uh huh," She nodded, too exhausted to speak coherently.
"I didn't think you would." There was an edge in his voice that made her stir. She sat back, looking him in the eyes.
"Why wouldn't I?" She asked, brows furrowing. He looked her face over, smiling and giving her a chaste kiss on the cheek.
"This was a boring trip." He said instead of answering her, "You should have come."
"Probably because the weather forced you to stay in the hotel most of the days." She scoffed, Johnny didn't respond.
They got ready for bed in relative silence, fixing the crumpled sheets and putting on the first thing they could find.
“How was your day?” Johnny asked once they were under the covers, so tired that the question occurred to him much later.
“Same old.” (Y/N) sighed, “Don’t ask about work.” She groaned, hating the topic.
“Have you decided if you’re ready to look for a new job?” He asked, making her look away from his concerned gaze to the ceiling.
“How will it matter? I’ll hate that too probably, at least at this one I know what I’m dealing with.”
“You just need to find something you like.” Johnny encouraged, nudging her with a gentle shove.
“It’s not that simple. Some of us aren’t gifted with passion. I wasn’t born with a single defining talent like you or Jaemin. Neither was I born with Jaehyun and Mark’s insatiable drive.” She groaned, feeling her eyes well a little at the corners.
“I’m just me.” She sighed. “Unremarkable.”
“No one is unremarkable. Least of all you.” Johnny chastised her. “One of these days, you will find something you actually like. Dare I say, something you love. Even if you don’t, even if it’s a dumb office job you do to pay the bills, your life has more value than a stupid job, (Y/N).” His fingers closed around the edge of the tshirt she was wearing. “You’re gifted with so many other things.”
She didn’t say anything, not wanting to sound like she was complaining but not believing him either. Johnny sighed, sensing it. To her relief, he didn’t say anything, probably sensing her mood as well. She didn’t want to talk about this now.
In the silence that followed, her eyes got heavier and sleep began to fill the distressed crevices of her mind with a promise of temporary relief.
Just before her eyes could close, she heard Johnny's clumsy shifting. An arm closed around her, dragging her close enough for him to dig his nose into her cheek.
So close, she could hear the small sigh that came from somewhere deep in his throat.
"I think I almost missed you." He mumbled, words muffled from being half asleep. His words, as usual, were carefully formed to not sound instigating— a joke as he called it. The tip of his nose traced a dizzying journey all over her neck. Johnny grunted from approval when she lifted her head to accommodate him, squeezing her firmly.
His journey stopped in her hair, where he buried his nose and took a large inhale. They stayed like that for a long time, till the otherwise cold night became balmy under the blanket.
“I’m hot.” Her voice was muffled in his shoulder, a silent request for him to move.
“Yeah you are.” He chuckled, patting her ass.
He pulled back, laughing louder when his words made her huff. Then there was another bout of silence as Johnny stared at the ceiling. She could tell that he had something on his mind. She fell into deep contemplation herself, wondering whether she should ask what was bothering him.
He sighed, taking in another deep breath that made his chest visibly deflate.
"You know," Johnny spoke to the ceiling, her heavy eyes fluttering open at the words. "I've been thinking about our university days a lot recently." He looped his finger into the chain he wore around his neck a few times. Fidgeting, she realised.
(Y/N) propped her head on her arm, turning on her side to face him.
"Yeah? Like what?" She asked, smiling at the thought.
"Well, a lot of things I suppose. I was just reminiscing. I can't believe it's been so long."
She hissed at the mention and Johnny smiled, eyes fixed above like he was picturing the past.
"But there's this one thing I keep coming back to." He said after a pause, unfurling the chain from his finger before wrapping it again.
"What is it?" She asked after he didn't speak for another pause.
Johnny turned, eyes dancing over her entire face. "Do you remember the first time we met?" He looked hopeful.
"At that house party?" She questioned, her memory fuzzy.
"No," Johnny turned back to the ceiling with a sigh, a fraction of the light disappearing from his eyes. "In that political philosophy class."
"Oh that's right. You came and sat beside me. You were in that red hoodie." She tried to recall, raising a brow when he scoffed.
"Yeah." His lips lifting before a brief laugh filled the room, "I can't believe you remember that."
"I remember thinking 'man that guy looks nice in red'." She teased, hoping he wouldn't realise it was the truth.
His face seemed to fall at the words, smile no longer reaching his eyes. She couldn’t understand what she said wrong.
"You had more to say than the professor." Johnny recalled, turning to look at her again. "I'm pretty sure you would have taught the class better too."
"I'm pretty sure a vacuum cleaner could teach that class better than him." She frowned, remembering the way the man wasted the syllabus.
Johnny laughed again, turning over on his side, "You said something similar that day too." His forehead gathered as he tried to remember what it exactly was, giving up after a moment. "You corrected him each time under your breath." Johnny grinned.
“I had never seen a single person have such strikingly wrong opinions.” She huffed, the memory still frustrated her.
“You wrote down everything he mentioned and when I asked you why, you said it was so you could verify it yourself later. It was the first week of university and I could not believe that someone could care that much about an extra credit/” Johnny laughed under his breath again. "All I wanted to do was ask for your number."
Her heart stopped, the words said so casually that for a moment she wasn't sure she heard him right.
"But then I thought that could be weird. What if I put you in a weird position?" He clicked his tongue, eyes lost in his memories again. "So I decided to write my number down on a piece of paper. This small chit I tore from the back of that political philosophy book because it was the first week and I didn't carry a notebook."
His eyes came back into focus, turning to look at her and giving a sad smile. Her heart picked up at the look, an unknown dread seeping into her.
"I was ready to give it to you right after class. I thought of something smooth to say to seal the deal too." He licked his lips, looking nervous for some unfathomable reason.
She wanted to ask why he didn't, realising once the thought formed in her mind that her inner voice was too ardent, filled with palpable regret.
"But then I asked you your major and you asked me the same." His voice faded.
This time she knew what he meant, remembering the words she said to him. The moment he told her, she responded with a single statement. It wasn't supposed to mean anything, but in hindsight the weight of the words pressed against her chest like sleep paralysis.
"Oh, you're in Jaehyun's class."
She bit down on her lip, like she was trying to reel in those words from the past. Her words must have had the spark of hope she had back then, having only just met Jaehyun a day before the time they were recalling. Still, she wondered why it would stop Johnny.
"I keep thinking about that." He confessed, giving her a look laced with regret. "How I should have given you that piece of paper anyway. The one I never forgot to throw out of that ratty pencil case I had. "I keep asking myself if all of this would have been different if I had. What would be different and what not." He continued, the jingle of the chain around his neck returning as he fidgeted. "Maybe I'm getting it all wrong and it would be a disaster. Would we be like we are now? Or would it be like the relationship I did have in university? All I know is that I should have given you that piece of paper."
She watched him in silence, sorrow seeping into her heart at those words. It left her with a gaping hole in her chest— the size of possibilities. Like most of her existence, this also became a what if that crippled her with its unrealised prospects; rendering her incapable of words.
"It doesn't matter now." She conjured words she didn't herself believe, "What good will thinking of these things do?"
Johnny's lips twitched like he didn't believe her. "That's funny coming from you." Both of them snorted. "I guess you're right. It was just a thought I couldn't shake, I was hoping that letting it out would make it quieter."
She shifted closer to him, "I think," Hesitating, she brushed her knuckled on his cheek. "I think that we wouldn't be who we are without the things we've seen, what we’ve lived. Who we are now matters more than who we could have been, no? Maybe we wouldn't be who we are to each other without everything that came in between."
Johnny looked her over slowly, like he was studying one of his photographs. "About that, you're right." He reached out to comb his fingers through her hair, sighing when she dissolved into his touch.
He took in a breath like he was going to say something. Her eyes became so heavy with sleep in his touch that she didn't notice time passed, opening her eyes to see if he would say what was on his mind.
“There’s the other thing too.” He said softly, his eyes glittering from the distant lights out his large windows. This time, she knew exactly what he meant.
“The kiss.” She sighed. He nodded, the weight of the words making him sink further into the mattress, his weight taking her along.
Johnny turned to her, his eyes deeply thoughtful. “That is the one I should regret. But in all these years–” His voice trailed off.
She wanted nothing more than to reach out to him at that moment. Yet, for some reason, Johnny never felt more distant than he did now. The same weight between them rendered her immobile.
She yearned for him then, something she realised she had never done before. Johnny was the one who always showed up, the one always by her side. She had needed his presence and she had craved his touch. But this was new and it weighed down heavier than everything that came before.
He turned to face her and she wondered if he could sense it. If the strings in her hurt tugged so hard because they were pulling him to her. He shifted closer, his nose brushing against hers.
She pressed her lips against his and Johnny’s breath caught in his throat. His hand came to her back, not moving her closer but just keeping her in place. Like he should have done all those years ago. When she pushed him away, realising her mistake.
But there was no pushing away tonight. Instead, she pressed closer to his chest, taking a shallow breath to keep kissing him without stopping. Johnny wanted to freeze this moment forever, to remember every little gasp and every twitch of his fingers.
When they finally pulled away, she put her forehead against his cheek.
“I’m so glad I walked up to you at the grocery store that day.” Johnny sighed, his entire chest twisting and caving as the burden of those words seemed to reveal itself only once he said it out loud.
She smiled, seemingly unaware of the true weight behind the confession.
“At least you gave me your number that time.” Her words made him chuckle.
#miscellenous#no time to blame#johnny smut#nct 127 smut#nct smut#johnny drabbles#jaehyun drabbles#nct 127 drabbles#nct drabbles#nct x reader#nct#nct 127#nct johnny#jaehyun#nct scenarios#jaehyun scenarios#johnny scenarios#johnny fluff#johnny angst#nct 127 scenarios#nct 127 angst#nct 127 fluff#nct angst#johnny suh#ask
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Just thinking about how much the “ witcher gamer” community would HATE Ciri if there was a game with a book accurate version of her, she’s queer, shes fierce, wild and arrogant but becomes ruthless and a murder gremlin due to all her trauma, shes not traditionally attractive, has a huge disfiguring scar on her face
And she is the main character, even if she’s not the player character the entire narrative revolves around her
Oh yeah, it’s a thing on Reddit/FB groups where people often ask if Ciri is “sociopathic”/“psychopathic” or surprised that they find her very unlikable after reading the books, which is always kind of funny to me.
Throughout the series there’s a definite theme of girls/young women who experience a severe trauma and then fall into a hateful cycle, and only sometimes having a redemptive moment of realisation that they’re perpetuating the same cycle that enacted violence of them. I also think that this sometimes makes people extremely uncomfortable, because they really do fall far while in this cycle - Falka!Ciri is vicious and filled with hate and enraged. She’s traumatised, lost her childhood and has become a product of the awful things happening to and around her.
Even past that point in her story, people tend to give feedback that she’s bratty or overconfident or annoying and honestly. The entire series is from the ages of about 8-17 (I may be off by a few years here btw!!) for Ciri. Her entire formative years are marked by horrible and traumatising events. I think a lot of people fall into the idea of “good victims” - people who go through trauma and come out kind and sweet and helpful and that their experiences made them ultimately a better person. Which realistically…is not the case for most people.
I’ve also seen Reddit argue a lot that Ciri isn’t actually a bisexual/queer woman, based on the fact that her relationship with Mistle is abusive and often reads like Stockholm Syndrome. I don’t think Sapkowski has ever officially labelled her sexuality and has left it open to interpretation. For me, this feeds back into the points earlier: Ciri is heavily traumatised and she’s also extremely young when all of this is happening, so I can somewhat agree that a definitive read on her sexuality could be hard. However, despite the fact their relationship is extremely fucked up, Ciri does clearly develop feelings for Mistle, and actively mourns her as a lover and partner. Regardless of the start of that relationship, I think it’s naive to say that Ciri didn’t have very real feelings for her?
Also yeah, I can’t ever see Ciri being what is considered “traditionally” attractive. The scar across her face repeatedly is linked to being a giant ugly symbol of the loss of her innocence and childhood, and considering the timeline of care it receives, I don’t ever see it being a small thing even as she gets older. She also spends again, a considerable amount of her youth on the run, under extreme stress and in undesirable conditions, which isn’t exactly conducive to what most people consider attractiveness. Additionally, considering how she’s reduced repeatedly to a sexual object and objectified, I really can’t see Ciri running around with her chest out as per games.
Ciri is honestly such a fascinating and complex character and I do think it’s sad that you can’t really get all of that from the games due to the perspective + difficulties in portraying that through the given platform. I do always hope that more people read the books for Ciri alone, because I’m always excited for content that fleshes her out with that level of development ❤️
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im so resentful of how no one is even talking about Selina in the main the batman tag. honestly she probably was the best iteration of her character I've ever seen. she was charismatic and charming and sly and she had a heart of gold. she had a thing about strays and loved the poor Russian girl who lived with her, loved her like nothing to the point where she actively defended her, stole things for her, and hunted for her when she was gone. upon finding her body she was devastated, but most importantly angry. she kept calling batman vengeance because batman is gotham and it's people and vengeance is what she wanted. Vengeance was want the people wanted for the state that they were in, and it's what she wanted. justice was the answer to one of the, if not the first riddle, and selina wanted the purest form of retribution. and when she was able to find out what happened to her mom her fury became something like long fossilized devastation and grief. she had nine lives. She spared Carmines, her fathers (imagine having to live in silence with that for years. knowing her saw you and also knowing he didn't know you saw him for what he was.) She's a watcher, and when she sees batman struggling she helps. She has a soft spot for strays struggling to find their place. She visits her mother's grave before she leaves the city forever, and oh my god if she asked me I would have left no question are you kiddingg. batman rlly said Celibacy W. there's just so much in her character, she's endlessly fascinating and it's so disappointing to me that she hasn't been explored or even talked about as much as the riddler ://
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I’ve read your google docs of the katayanagi twins’ fashion. Super interesting stuff and I love it as both a fashion enthusiast and fan of the siblings. Your document really emphasizes the distinction between those two even with the very little info we have on them (kyle’s style could be late 80s japanese pop while ken’s style could be more leaning towards visual kei). Also matches their personalities (ramona mentioned kyle is the hothead of the two, so I guess the pretty and proper bad boy kind of look fits him)
Something about your endnote fascinates me, however. You mentioned something about the twins’ relationship being strained but then strengthened after ramona’s betrayal. Would you implore more on the idea? I’m now invested in it very much…. thank you and have a good day
Thank you!!! I mostly based my looks off this piece of concept art by O’Malley, which makes me think the personalities the twins had in their few anime appearances were just parts that weren’t as well communicated in Vol. 5
(I think that little doddle next to the crossed out “they’re not even Japanese” emphasizes that visual kei comparison you made)
But as for the second bit, I think the twins weren’t exactly on great terms, even before Ramona. A decent part of this has to do with my own personal head cannons surrounding Kyle and how I perceived his and Ramona’s relationship with alcohol, but also with just how different the twins seem to be under the surface. They seem like they would run in almost completely opposite social circles and be invested in similarly opposite things.
And it’s honestly really tied to their teens. Basically, their parents kinda unintentionally set up a dynamic where Kyle felt like Ken got away with everything (piercings, weird clothes, going out to band shows and having a more trusting relationship with their parents) and Ken thought Kyle couldn’t get his act together (partying, showing up back home late, getting in fight with their parents). Neither was true as in reality their parents let a lot of stuff with Ken slide that wouldn’t have otherwise because “well at least he’s not drunk” and Kyle was genuinely going through some serious mental shit but not telling anyone so his actions just looked super random and mean spirited. So by the time they get to college, they haven’t really addressed this weird image they have of the other in their heads.
And it explains how Ramona was even able to two time siblings. They’re not going to the same parties, they’re not really talking at length about their lives (since they never mention enough detail to make the other suspicious), they’re probably not really bothering each other much if they share a dorm. Ramona unconsciously sees and plays this divide, knowing they’re not really together enough for her to get caught.
It also emphasizes for me a very emotional aspect for all three of them. Ramona is hot off a messy break up (Roxie), the breakup that ended her first relationship with a women and also seems to be her first attempt at having something…maybe not serious but genuine (it seemed more important than anything with Matt Todd or Lucas). Shes hardly in the headspace to be in a relationship, and maybe after some nights out, she’s terrified and not sure what to do because whoops she’s in two! And the longer it goes on the less Ramona actually wants to fix it because it’s kinda fun in a messed up way, and the twins aren’t bad company…until it all comes crashing down and she’s out the door before they even notice she’s gone. I think Ramona’s relationship with the twins is her at her actual lowest, with her being most at fault for what happened and the least justified in bolting afterwards. This low point is exactly when Gideon finds her, unsure and upset at herself, in exactly the position to manipulate her. (Sorry if this came off a little Ramona bash-y, I love Ramona but this girl makes bad choices)
As for the twins, I think the really strong emotional beat here is the idea of how avoidable it would’ve felt for them. How if they had just been able to set aside their own bullshit, if they had even bothered to connect at all, they could’ve figured it out in a few days, rather than in a few weeks or a few months. Ramona’s betrayal is catalyst for them to sit down and just…talk out a lot of their own personal crap.
But yeah that’s why. Sorry this got super massively long, but I hope you liked it and it wasn’t too ramblely lol.
#long post#anon ask#scott pilgrim#ken katayanagi#kyle katayanagi#katayanagi twins#ramona flowers#my head cannons#thank thank thank you for bringing this up I’ve been dieing to talk about it#the twins low key seem like the kinda guys to be super put together on the outside but like five seconds from unraveling on the inside#I love them they are my messy idiots#also this is mostly based on comic lore don’t come in here with that they were her TAs nonsense#they can be players but weirdos? nuh uh. no.#tho I am deeply curious like what was Ramona’s major? engineering maybe since she knows about the sub space highways
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𝙲𝚛𝚔 𝚡 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚒𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝙲𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚘𝚛(𝚝𝚘𝚑)
《Summary》: Basically the reader acts and has the same power of the collector from toh.
○Reader is Gendernutral
○Characters are Pure vanilla cookie,Licorice cookie, Strawberry and Strawberry crepe cookie, and lastly cherry cookie
○This story is strictly platonic because reader is a minor ( the collector is a minor too people)
○ Hope you enjoy:)
○ Part two here
🍓𝙎𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙬𝙗𝙚𝙧𝙧𝙮 𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙥𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙤𝙠𝙞𝙚🧇
●Huh, so you're an immortal deity who looks and acts like a child but your magic is extremely powerful? COOL!
●You guys probably cause so much chaos in the Vanilla Kingdom because of how similar you're personalities are.
●They think you're games are fun.
●I can just Imagine you showing off your powers to Crepe (probably doing magic tricks )and them being absolutely fascinated by it.
●FRIENDSHIP BRACLETS
●You might even tell them stories about your life and how other cookies used you for your powers and trapped you for being to dangerous.
●They don't really get why you got trapped . I mean how unfair is that? Being locked away for being a child?! How stupid those cookies are.
●Crepe cookie shows you their waffle bots! They think that you're so cool so obviously they show you what they've been working on. Since yk they don't have real friends :p
●"Y/N cookie you are the most fun ever! I wonder if there are other cookies like you."
●"No cookie on earth bread is as cool as me! Well maybe you could be a close second place."
🍒ℂ𝕙𝕖𝕣𝕣𝕪 𝕔𝕠𝕠𝕜𝕚𝕖💣
●If you thought that you and Strawberry crepe cookie were chaotic than you definitely thought wrong.
●You and her (and her friends) pull pranks and tricks on the other cookies for gits and shiggles definitely.
●You explode things with her too. You use your powers to make giant explosions that make the ground shake, and the cookies tremble at the sudden shaking of the ground.
●When you do tell her you were locked away for you being to powerful she is definitely upset at that. I mean you're so fun! How could you possibly be a danger? (Don't take that literally)
●"WOW Y/N cookie that explosion was amazing! I sure the whole of earth bread was shaking! Do it again!"
●"Okay Cherry cookie!"
🌻𝐏𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐞🍦
● He's like a father figure to you. He teaches you right from wrong, how to help cookies in need to with your powers, yk stuff like that
●Instead of treating you like a threat, he actually treats you like a child, he treats you like a decent cookie being.
●He would honestly love playing games with you.
●When you first meet him you thought he was boring and you kinda make a few jokes about him being an old uncle.
●Not surprisingly, when you told him about your past and being treated like a threat he hugged you. He probably said something like "Oh my dear child, I am incredibly sorry that happened to you."
●He protects you from Dark entrances cookie and the other members of Cookies Of Darkness so they don't manipulate you into using your magic for evil.
●Dark rasin cookie and the others of the Pure vanilla Kingdom didn't trust you at first but after P.V cookie said you weren't dangerous they started to warm up to to.
●you unironically call him uncle Pure Vanilla .
●"Hey uncle Pure Vanilla cookie , is this right?"
●"Yes Y/N cookie, it is very right."
💀𝕃𝕚𝕔𝕠𝕣𝕚𝕔𝕖 𝕔𝕠𝕠𝕜𝕚𝕖💀
●When Dark Entrances cookie announced that there would be a new addition to the Cookies Of Darkness he was beyond confused when he saw the new member was a child.
●You find it funny when he throws a tantrum over a mission going wrong, or when one tiny detail of his plan goes wrong.
●You and Poision Mushroom mock him together, you definitely mock him with Poision Mushroom cookie.
●But holy shit - when he sees what your magic is capable of he's ashamed to admit it makes him nervous.
●Seriously, a cookie as young as yourself is capable of magic like THAT? You have to had practice for thousands of years to be that powerful- wait what? You actually ARE thousands of years old ??
●Honestly how can a cookie as old as you be so immature?
●You think of him as a cranky older brother figure who constantly tells you what you can and can't do.
●He sees now why Dark Entrances cookie chose you to join The Cookies Of Darkness ,because you are an agent of pure chaos .
●When he hears about your past he does at least try to act a bit nicer to you.
●"Y/N COOKIE! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY CLOAK!?
●"I fixed it duh! It was so dull before! But now it looks much better after I added a pop of color to it. Don't you like it?"
●"NO! I DO NOT LIKE IT!"
🍓ꜱᴛʀᴀᴡʙᴇʀʀʏ ᴄᴏᴏᴋɪᴇ🍓
●You two are polar polar opposites.
●A shy, quiet, and introverted cookie like her and a loud, playful, extroverted cookie like yourself. It is a mystery how you two even meet in the first place
●She and friends found you lost and wandering around the forest, so they offered to let you join if you were lost.
●The very first thing she noticed about you was your ecstatic personality. You were just a pure ball of energy (and probably sugar.)
●When walking with them you were talking about your life events and random child things.
●I broke her heart when she heard what happened to you and all the pain you must have inside. Spoiler alert you weren't all that upset about it.
●But she was clearly blinded by your child-like clothes and personality because your powers did not match at all.
●You were pretty sure everyone was shocked when they saw just how powerful (and old) you are.
●You like teasing her about how quiet and shy she is and how much she blushes and hides in her hood when you make one of those comments .
●She kinda likes playing games with you and seeing you so happy. But when she says she needs a break from playing all day it's gets boring. I mean besides her and her friends you don't really have anyone else.
●Also has to teach you right from wrong.
●Just like strawberry crepe you guys got friendship braclets. Specifically the braclets that when put together say 'best friends'
●You talk to her about what it would be like if you had your own kingdom and subjects to rule over.
●"In My kingdom it's illegal to be sad unless absolutely mandatory. I don't like it when little cookies are sad. It makes me upset :("
●"U-uh Y/N cookie , doesn't it seem kind of cruel to forbid cookies to , you know , be sad?" "I mean I get sad all the time. Would you ban me from being upset?"
● "I said unless it's mandatory. And yes, I would never allow you to be sad in my kingdom. If you're not sad you're always happy! Which means everyone is constantly in a good mood!
●"I don't think that's how that works. . ."
●"Oh right I forgot to mention! If a cookie breaks the rules they get executed. :)"
●"They get what!?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~☆Fin☆~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
《Part two coming soon》
#cookie run x reader#toh collector#crk x reader#child!reader#deity!reader#cr ovenbreak#cookie run kingdom
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Montaña Bazofia spoilers
Tulio Triviño is one of the most popular 31 minutos characters. Which, of course he is, he's the main main character. He gets talked about a lot but what I don't see as much is people discussing his upbringing and Why He's Like That when his family is so different. We learn more about his family in the comic, Montaña Bazofia. Particularly his father, who is a bit infamous with people who are aware of him. I'll get to him soon enough. From the show, we know his mom is very supportive of him. She praised him very much. He is a mothers boy. We know she was one of the first watchers of the show. He seems to have a decent relationship with him. Although constant appraisal of her child could've influenced his ego, although there are many factors to a dysfunctional ego. One of which is having a dysfunctional upbringing. Which brings me to the topic of his dad. Tulios dad is terrifying, straight up. He is emotionally stunted and seems to have some anger issues. When Tulio went to visit him, to some extent, his anger towards Tulio was fair. Tulio abandoned his family and father to go get rich and have a news show. It was shown that ever since Tulio left, he has spent most of his time in his despacho. (Idk how to say it in English sorry) The way he showed his anger, was however honestly kinda cruel. When Tulio walked up to him (with great hesitation) he said that he hopes he leaves soon and never calls him his father again. He even told him he's dead to him and has disinheritited him. He didn't believe Tulio came back with wholesome intentions (Although he was right about that) he literally said "tell me why you're here or I'll kill you". After that Tulio soon asks him why he never accepted him. Tulio then tries to remember good times he's had with his father, only to come up with nothing. Which either implies he legimately did not have any good moments with him, or that he just doesn't remember. And neither are great options. Tulio isn't a great person. He's done shitty things to everyone, including his dad. But his dad has been doing shitty things to him for a long time. At the end of the comic, he reveals that he's watched all his shows and interviews. And has actually supported his career. He has a heartfelt moment (heartfelt in heavy quotation marks) where he reveals that during Tulios childhood, whenever he made fun of him, ignored him, critiqued him, and even pulled his chair often when he was about to sit, he did it because he loved Tulio the most. He even admits that it probably wasn't the best way to show it. And the thing is, Tulio was the only child he did this to apparently. (Jesus christ no wonder Tulios fucked) This treatment would just ruin a child's self esteem, no matter what. He had no reason to do any of those things. It didn't make Tulio stronger or anything, it just gave him issues. Combine a father that was mean and critical vs a mom that was super nice, I only wonder if that was what caused his ego dysfunctionality. In a flashback to kid Tulio in the movie, he was showing signs of a high ego. It happens in real life and yeah I'm aware I'm looking too deep into this, but the implications are hard to ignore. Tulios' father did love him, he was just not great at showing it by any means. He was hurt by Tulio's not so great actions but he's also done many not good things to Tulio. His dad does want to be there for him. I think he just needs to find way better ways of it. Tulio could've had a naturally high ego of course, but I think his childhood affected it even more. The back and forth between the two parenting methods seems overwhelming idk. This genuinely is fascinating to me and I wish there was more discussion on Tulio's father. Neither of them are the best people, but both in different ways. I think they'll have a rocky relationship for a long while more.
#31 minutos#tulio triviño#sr tulio triviño#i fucking hate these puppets man#rereading the comic made me mad at his dad ngl#he has serious daddy issues thats insane#i feel a bit ridiculous psychoanalyizing a sock monkey thats the biggest moron ever#tulio is just like me fr (i am in agony)#nero writing
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Given how things are shaping up in C3 I have some thoughts about what might happen next (moon scouting aside). It’s clear that the Hells are given power-ups similar but different to the Vestiges of Divergence quests in VM. And honestly, I totally understand how the shard ended up with Ashton rather than Fearne. From an in-character perspective (and even from a player perspective), of course it went to them. The shard appeared at the end of what has essentially been Ashton’s backstory quest, which has been all about titans. Ashton is about titans and dunamancy. Fearne is about fae and a touch of infernal. So when people insist she get the titan shard just because they’re both fire-based? The shard that appeared right at the end of Ashton’s quest for information about himself? Yeah, I’d want to give it to him too, concentrating titan power into Ashton.
And that leads me to my real thoughts about what happens next: essentially the Hells, or at least several of them, have doubled down on what originally gave them power. Ashton has doubled down on titans, Laudna on Delilah (and I think we’ll get a full quest of that later).
I think that the moon scouting mission will double as something of Imogen’s continued backstory quest (a lot of the early part of the campaign started it, but this, I hope, will focus on Leliana). I think we’ll probably gain some moon object for her to absorb and power her up with moon stuff. And that’s another thing about the way this is shaping up: they are embracing the most dangerous parts of themselves, the parts that could kill them or turn them evil. That’s what each of them will have to grapple with (and why I’m thrilled it was Ashton who got the fire shard, because that puts them on a collision course with repeating the choices their father made, and really coming to terms with what being Hishari means. From a storytelling perspective, this is by far the cooler choice).
I have an idea that Laudna could literally absorb Delilah in a way that Delilah is no longer in control. Laudna becoming her own patron is the best possible end to cutting her puppet strings, and that would be a fascinating way to do it: stealing all the power and the last bit of essence of the woman who murdered her. There is something of a darkness there, with the end of a vengeance storyline, which will be juicy.
Fearne would have two options: doubling down on being Fey by obtaining something from another spelunk in the Feywild, or going to the hells and retrieving something infernal. I think the infernal route is likely the real Dark Fearne route, while the fey route likely puts her on the path to becoming Archfey, which could be a very interesting end for her character (and likely one Ashley would be intrigued by, to become the new Grandma Morri).
Chetney is likely going to delve either into something Catha-related (other moon, whoo!) or something nature-related. I think going white moon to Imogen’s red moon would be cool, and would really focus in on controlling his werewolf side.
FCG is likely going to have to go Aeorian. They could go divine, but I think Aeorian would be juicier. Delving into their past and the person they used to be before they lost their memories is something I’ve been excited for, and even though they’re already coming to the conclusion, realizing that what makes them themselves is their choices now, not a thousand years ago, will be very cool. We might even see a different side to FCG come out and be in conflict with his current self (something else I’m expecting in a lot of these storylines).
And finally there’s Orym, the little guy. He’s actually the hardest to define how to give a power-up to, because so much of his story is about not having that. All his friends are magical powerhouses, and he’s a little dude with a sword. So I actually am hoping that Orym either goes for another nature-based Wildmother powerup (making him the one with divine powers), or one of entirely humanity-based power, possibly by teaming up with someone like Percy, who was also never divine.
Anyway, this all may get proven wrong (and a lot of the finer details almost certainly will!), but this is sort of the trajectory I see in the next leg of their journey: getting their own legendary power-ups, but those power-ups forcing them to confront their past and the possible futures. And because they’re incorporating them into their very beings, those confrontations are both inevitable and necessary.
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Hey so I'm interested in writing for bartkon week, but I like doing frankly excessive research on characters before I try writing them...and honestly I don't really want to read all of SB94, impulse and YJ just to get a handle on what I'm doing, that's a lot even for me. I know some general stuff about the both of them, but not to the point where I'm like "Ah yes, I understand the soul of the matter" So I was wondering if there were like any specific arcs or points of characterization that I could read through to get the dynamic right?
shfkjdsfd ngl, I'm the worst person to ask bc my romance with BartKon didn't even start with BartKon....... it started with Clark/Bart from Smallville 😭😭😭 I'm exceptionally weak for Kryptonian/Speedster romances, but whereas Clark/Bart was the gateway, Bart/Kon is where my heart resides. And I don't ship any other Kryptonians with Speedster. Literally just Clart from Smallville and BartKon from the comics. Just giving you context so you don't think I'm some subject matter expert with a phd in BartKononomics ...... I am just a lady in her thirties who has carboard boxes full of sb/imp/yj singles cuz Clart made her Feel Things when she was a kid and she decided to Do Something about it (aka read comics).
BUT TO YOUR QUESTIONS!
If you want a high level overview of the ship, @radioactive-earthshine's KonBart Manifesto is a great place to start. It has the ship's Best Highlights, and really sums up why there is a small but dedicated fanbase to it. Dedicated enough that I broke my near-ten year cold turkey of mainline DC comics because my main man Bendis put BartKon back on the map while I was living my life blissfully unaware that DC had even hired Bendis to begin with and that the Diamond distro monopoly died. I was shocked. Still am. Two things I never thought would happen in my lifetime.
Now to understand the soul of Bart and Kon.... you're gonna have to look at that things that don't really have Bart and Kon on the same page. Part of the reason why BartKon Speaks to Me is because their relationship progression over the year directly ties back to their individual growth as characters.
So reading material 1: In Impulse, Bart starts off as the speedster equivalent of a feral bobcat, but slowly progresses into an empathetic, understanding, and an overall Good Man. Much of his story deals with the harsh realities of simply growing up different. Running theme of Imp fandom is that Mark Waid created and wrote an autist with ADHD without meaning too, and by Allah he sure did. It's fascinating because Bart harbors both grief and rage due to his predicaments, and the adults in his life are incredibly unkind (even if they are well-meaning), so Impulse has always been, in my understanding, the slice-of-life that really helps Bart to come of age into a Man and a Great Hero. You don't have to read the whole series, but if you can read at least the first twenty or so issues, you'll find yourself rooting for the little man and see how he shines in terms of empathy, understanding, love, and dealing with unresolved rage/grief/loss.
Reading material 2: Superboy is a trick and a half because it deals with issues of child neglect, grooming, the allegory of child star exploitation, and so on and so forth. The BartKon implications are There, but the reason why Superboy is incredibly important is because Superboy as a character is more than just his parentage. Contrary to popular belief, Geoff is NOT the main man in this story. Reading even just the first twenty issues of Superboy will show you Kon was failed by most of the adults in his life, and Superman is NOT his villain. Or the root of his daddy issues. Bro didn't even have a name until much later. If you wanna know who Superboy REALLY was before the Geoffian Era, you can read the first twenty odd issues. If you wanna go earlier, you could read his parts in Reign of the Supermen, just to get an understanding as to why he HAD to be the way he was during this time.
Reading material 3: I do not recommend reading all of YJ 98 for the BartKon bc YJ 98 is hijinks fun. It's GREAT reading for absurdist and comical situations, but only really works with context from Impulse and Superboy to get to the BartKon heart of it all. Not to say YJ 98 wouldn't give you the BartKon goodness, it sure does, but the soul doesn't come together if you don't get how Bart evolved in Impulse and how terribly Kon was treated in Superboy. You can read really anything in YJ to have fun with the group, but if you wanna fast track, you can read the last twenty or so issues and Titans/Young Justice Graduation Day.
Reading material 4: The Geoffian era..... I wouldn't wish Teen Titans 2003 on my worse enemy. Funniest thing is that at the time, I was just starting to watch Smallville. In love with Smallville!Bart already, I embarked on my Superboy journey.... had mixed feelings, so I stuck mostly to the 90's content. Ended up reading impulse a decade later, but long story short.... the Geoffian Era set a Tone and Direction for Bart and Kon that never sit well with me. There IS story there, if you are interested in reading about Daddy Issues, Masculine Identity, and a shit ton of other stuff that really pulled Kon away from his roots and made him more of a Emotionally Tortured Super. If that floats your boat, you may enjoy it. You can read a handful of comics from this era. Just know that in the end, he suffers anyway, just in an ugly ass outfit. The only real bit I'd recommend forreal forreal is when he dies. His whole arc in the Geoffian Era really just tells us he doesn't know how to live and thus he... dies. It's sad bc the writers before him despite having tortured Kon relentlessly, never really made him so...... hopeless.
Reading material 5: Flashpoint.... Bart dies, but I personally did not feel much for him because Bart didn't feel like Bart in the end, but yeah, he kicks it. This is where I pretty much kicked DC to the side too, minus the mistake that was reading RHATO. You can read Kid Flash Lost if you'd like.
Do not read New 52.
Reading material 6:.... my main man Bendis. No you do not have to read all of YJ 2019, but BartKon reunion and then Bart's explication as to WHY he found Kon is all you need. Bendis, despite the hate he gets, actually shows that he has great love for the YJ line. BartKon especially. The bald headed demon proves yet again that he care not for the world, only for his faves, which I'm cool with bc BartKon are me faves.
I know. A lotta reading. Those numbers I gave you.... you can also just read half of what I said kjdhgkhd Googling also helps! I know it's not always feasible to read so many comics, and I'mma be real, the Tone for many may not entice you either. Impulse feels like a slice-of-life to me, but YJ's an absurd shounen, and Superboy is the saddest book you'll ever read that is absolutely hilarious when you can accept that 90's writers just Did Not Care. Geoff hates Bart and Kon. New 52 is not real. Bendis actually loves BartKon a LOT, so you can just read their tidbits and find peace in the fact that Bart Allen, the loneliest fucker in existence, found his Kon El, who is the saddest fucker in existence. Something something, I will find you even if God wants us both dead. And God (editorial) did. I don't know how Bendis pulled the shit that he did, but he put a decades old rarepair back on the map after the Geoffian Reign. And Geoff hates Bart and Kon.
Happy Reading/Googling/Researching!!!!
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The Mosley Review: Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes
What continues to be fascinating about this franchise is the amount of humanity that is found in the world of the apes. The amazing Caesar trilogy brought us a fresh take on the franchise that focused on the apes rising as we watched humanity fall and how much of our worldly views influenced how they would live among us. That made his trilogy special and set up a future that was ripe for exploring. This film carries that same torch and takes a very natural turn that is familiar and special in its execution. The idea of what Caesar fought for and believed in was on display of apes living together in peace, but the idea of one ape twisting his word to something more sinister was fun to watch and added that layer of drama that kept me invested. I honestly could've just watched the apes live in their village and be satisfied. The adventure doesn't take long to begin and where we are taken was essentially a rescue mission and along the way we learn what has happened many generations after Caesar. Where the film benefits is in the apes of course and when the humans are introduced it becomes a balancing act between the retrieving of the main characters' family and the humans slowly trying to reconnect with each other. It works for the most part, but there are moments where I wished it followed just the apes.
Owen Teague takes the lead as Noa in this new story and I loved his performance. He delivers so much warmth and innocence through his eyes and the compassion he has for his friends and family. I liked that he was constantly learning about the world beyond and above his village. As the film progress, he matures quickly from the young boy type to a man fighting for his clan. Its a classic coming of age story for a young warrior that works everytime. Lydia Peckham and Travis Jeffery were great as his friends Anaya and Soona. You feel the tender care and building of a relationship between Noa and Anaya that was sweet. The bond between Noa and Soona was fun and their banter in the beginning was great. I wouldn't mind another adventure with just the three of them together. Peter Macon was excellent as Raka and I loved his jovial nature. He was a wealth of knowledge that Noa needed to see and hear about and I loved the time we spent with him. He highlighted the real ideals of Caesar and he even felt like a preacher more than a historian. On the human side, Freya Allan joins the franchise as Mae and I thought she was great. The survivalist nature of humanity always bounces between the background and foreground in these films and she was no different. She didn’t take up space and I liked that for the majority of the film she was silent and showed off her physicality in conveying emotion and thought. William H. Macy was fun as a more dare I say, domesticated human to Proximus Caesar, Trevathan. He was so defeated, fearful and yet at ease with giving up the thought of the before apes ruled. He gave a different yet familiar view of stockholm syndrome. Speaking of Proximus Caesar, the very underrated and outstanding Kevin Durand delivers an incredible and dominating performance as the antagonistic king. He exudes power and ambition as the one thing he desires is yet a few feet from him. He had a vision even if it was a cruel and sometimes violent one. Through him and thanks to Trevathan's teachings, you see a complete mirror of how the Roman Empire created civilization, but in ape form.
Composer John Paesano brought to life this new look at the world in a very emotional and epic way. His score elevated the pain of loss during the bridge scene and highlighted the tension when Noah meets Proximus. Visually the film is as stunning and rich as the previous films and the CGI used to bring the motion capture performances to life is some of the best this franchise has ever seen. As I've always said since the beginning of the current wave of Apes films, I care more for the apes than the humans. If this film was solely following the journey of Noah and no humans were in it, I would be even more happy. This was still a great entry to the franchise and Director Wes Ball has done an incredible job bringing us back to the Planet of the Apes franchise. Let me know what you thought of the film or my review in comments below. Thanks for reading!
#kingdom of the planet of the apes#owen teague#kevin durand#lydia peckham#travis jefferey#peter macon#freya allan#william h macy
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chengqingxian for the ask meme?
Thanks for the ask!
Do you ship it?
No, sorry.
Why don’t you ship it?
Uhhhh. I don't have much against the ship itself rather than how the live action portrayed Chengqing (and consequently Wen Qing) along with the fact that Wen Qing is one of the two female characters who Wei Wuxian has an actual relationship with.
What would have made you like it?
Oh good point! I do have a fondness for mad scientists who experiment with the poor guy (Jiang Cheng)'s body. Especially novel canon Wen Qing because like—girlie just got pestered enough to experiment on him and Just Did It. Sure why not. Wei Wuxian and Wen Qing's relationship is one of the most fascinating to me because it's about recognising yourself in the other in the worst of times. I do think this ship has ample potential....I would love to see the tragedy of loving two people who decided that they knew what the best for you was, one decided that Clearly She Needs To Cut The Other Up For Science And Shove It Into You and now you have to live with it. Just....Idk, CQL sure was trying to Do Something. That something wasn't for me, good for those who like it though. It sure is feeding everyone's character interaction needs from the little I did watch.
Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it?
Mhmm. Anything involving a character that's canonically dead dead and another that has been dead once and another that's famous for never moving on from the denial phase of grief is always a tasty one. Especially if the former two are also real famous for teaming up to consult each other to decide what's best for their younger sibling/shidi. Like....when do they fall for each other? Is it before the war? Is it Miss Grumpy, Mr. Grumpy and Mr. Haha Hehe (all three insane), somehow developing something? Like,,,I do love the horror and intimacy of Qingxian first meetcute because of the instant understanding that the other would leave no stones unturned if something happened to their precious one. But if it did happen before the war....then there's something distinctly horrifying about Wen Qing performing a surgery she had always theorized about, never got subjects for and then got them handed to her and they are the ones she loved. Fucked up. Deeply obsessed with her response when she sees a prone Jiang Cheng in the novel is to go "oh you bring a tortured man and you couldn't bother to knock him unconscious so that he doesn't make people suspicious? Shame on you Wen Ning" and then shoves needles into his head herself. It's just none happiness with left grief for Jiang Cheng because of course the man he loves decides to walk off from him along with the woman he loves as well. Do they not—and they are dead. Great. Great. Wei Wuxian? Wei Wuxian is trying so hard to convince himself that this time he will do the self sacrifice and intimidating other clans with his red eyeliner thing correct. It's not working? OTHER people can do the self sacrifice thing too? Oh no. Honestly this is just canon but sadder, I think.
.....well I have definitely seen manyAUs where Jiang Cheng is engaged to Wen Qing Yanli style and Wei Wuxian feels very normal emotions about it. Surely one also exists where random political marriage between the Yiling Patriarch, Sandu Sengshou and Wen-daifu.
#kk's ask tag#mdzs#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#mo dao zu shi#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#wen qing#chengqingxian#(the red eyeliner part is meant in jest but it's mostly about the argument he has with JZX (bad one) where he goes ''I want to SHOW the#cultivation world that I can be powerful even without using the righteous path''#a few days later he complains to JC about JZX (normal) being a peacock.)
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I saw your post about Saga and I 100% agree. I love her character so much and was so happy they avoided stereotypes AND gave her agency. She wasn't there just to save Alan (the horrid magical black person troupe was avoided) she was there for people who meant something to her and they just so happen to work together by the end. Remedy truly wrote a fascinating character and got a great actress to portray her. I'm glad the hate died out from the reactionaries but the apathy from the fandom is just as bad sometimes. I love her personality and I honestly love AnderCase as a ship and incorporating Saga into ships (AndercasexWake is a thing for me lol). I also like them as friends, their dynamic is so damn good I want to see them in future games. However, I gave up writing Andercase because people just ignore it most of the time. The fandom in general kind of feels isolating if you don't like the standard ships/characters. It's discouraging and sad and makes it hard to want to post. I tried again and of course the fic did poorly so I don't bother, reminds me how little people want anything to do with Saga. Even general fics would be awesome if people are squicked by het or don't like Saga and Casey as a ship. The fan space for her and ships/dynamics with her is so small...Drawing her is scary too given someone was attacked over it, so that worries me too and I kind of backed away. There's barely anything of Saga in any fanworks and when women are involved they gravitate to Rose and in some cases Estevez (the Yakuza mod just broke my heart they did not think to add Saga before Rose who has less time and at a point people shipped Casey with Estevex BEFORE Saga like WHAT). I know that struggle you're feeling. Saga and anything with her is a footnote and I know it's not malicious but it sucks. Fandom favoritism does not help, even in the smallness of Saga fandom content only a handful are seen and the rest ignored. I've been there and seen it, it pushes newcomers away. I hope this gets better in the future but not holding my breath. Love Remedyverse/Remedy but the fandom space depresses me which sucks because everyone seems nice to me, just...sorry for the rambling. Just saw a post that resonated with my frustrations.
Do you know the thing that gets me the most about Saga? She was created by a white man. And he, along with the other writers, made SURE to avoid the stereotypes we usually get in black women protags, especially in video games. She has a power, yes, but she's not using it solely to save one person. She doesn't even know she HAS a power until halfway through the game!
She wants to save her daughter first and foremost and then Casey, she tells Alan this point-blank, save my daughter and Casey, non-negotiable, she's NOT helping him otherwise. And you can see that as selfish, but it's not, if it had JUST been herself thrown into the story? She would've been FINE with it, you see her getting more and more excited about the case. She's intrigued EVERY step of the way. It only becomes personal when Alan has the audacity to use Logan and Casey, that's her line in the sand.
Melanie puts so much into making Saga come alive, because as amazing as the writing is, she could've still fallen into the sassy black woman trope, and Melanie doesn't let that happen. I think the ONLY criticism you can give her is that her accent slips, but I really never noticed it. I agree that I'm glad the hate from the dumbass gamer bros, but like you said, the apathy can be just as bad, it's a choice to not say the quiet part outloud.
I genuinely wish they'd just say, she's a black woman, therefore, I'm not interested in her. I only care about the white men. At least be HONEST about it, instead of raving about how fun it was to play as Saga and she's so badass but not backing it up with actions.
I love Andercase with every fiber of my being. I loved them from their first scene, despite knowing she was married to somebody else. Casey is Saga's support, you see her loving to crack her puns to Casey, she even thinks of one and saves it to memory solely to tell it to Casey. Not Logan, not David, but Casey.
They mirror each other, again from their first scene, drinking coffee at the same time. A trait they keep, even as the horror story creeps closer. Casey wouldn't be even a little bit interesting to me if he wasn't paired with Saga. He's the moon and she's the sun.
I'm so sorry you were discouraged to write and post about Andercase, even just as besties. Because their dynamic IS gold, and it echoes even when they're separated. The second Kiran shows up and kicks Saga off the case, she gets over it, fine, she'll deal, but help her find her partner, damnit! I've enjoyed fics where they are just besties, the ones that ACTUALLY focus on them and, you know, doesn't make Saga the driving force for CaseyWake and nothing else.
I think that's one of the reasons it's hard for me to ship Saga and FBI Casey with anyone else, because they're each other's closest interactions for so much of the game. It's hard for me to ship Alan with them because I see him and Saga as the true platonic soulmates of the AW2 cast and Casey HATES Alan. All the way up the ending of the final draft. You can see it in his expression and body language, if he hadn't just been through the wringer and so happy to see Saga, he definitely would've punched Alan for all he shit he's put them through.
Writing a pairing you love, feeling so proud and happy about the work you've done, just to see it brushed aside is one of the most painful feelings as a creator. Fandom is supposed to be for EVERYONE, it's not supposed to be high school cliques that can't interact with each other. I don't ship Alan with Saga's Casey (it's just the only way I see him, heh), but I've seen some AMAZING fan art for them that's made me smile. But you rarely see Saga involved, which makes no sense in regards to her Casey. If it was fictional Casey, that would make sense, he doesn't exist outside of Alan's head, while Saga's Casey is a living, breathing person who spends most of his time with Saga or talking about her.
Yet she's relegated to the bro when her Casey and Alan only have her in common. I can't buy Casey being soft and domestic with Alan to save my life. I see it with Saga, I can see Saga being soft with Alan because she does show that side to him. That's who she is, if you've earned her trust and respect. You can tell Saga is always the "good cop" while Casey is the "bad cop." The only time you see him sympathetic towards Alan is when he first washes up to shore. He's mocking him but holding his tongue because Saga's not going to take that nonsense from him.
You only see Casey show the full force of his anger towards Alan when Saga isn't there to stop him. To say "Yes, THAT'S the actual love story here" is a...choice, one that actively ignores the on-screen narrative. Again, fictional Casey and Alan are a completely different topic and not something I care enough to write about.
NOBODY should be attacked for liking a pairing because what does that do? What does it accomplish except make yourself feel better and superior? Again, it's been a choice to ignore the two main women in the series, which are Alice and Saga. But I've seen quite a few fics where Alice gets to be paired with CaseyWake, while you'll be hard-pressed to find a fic where Saga gets to interact with them. That tells me something that makes me uncomfortable. And that's covert racism.
You can't even make the excuse that there's nothing left to learn about Saga, because that's simply untrue. We know the bare minimum about her family on the Anderson side, and absolutely nothing concerning her father (who is Warlin Door and I will die on that hill). We don't know much about her created family, certainly nothing about David, outside of the fact he likes Bright Springs, and boardgames and doesn't take his daughter to get checked out after she hits her head in the shower. The fact her entire identity ISN'T just Logan's mother and David's wife means so much to me.
You can't tell me it's because she's married either, because how can you say that in one breath and then ship Alan with anyone but Alice in the same breath? It genuinely leads me to think it's simply that she's a BLACK woman. And as you said, seeing people create ships for Rose and to pair Estevez with CASEY, when she's an out-and-out lesbian that Casey only meets near the end of the game speaks volumes.
I genuinely think if you swapped her race, she would be less ignored, and that's extremely fucked up. Saga was created with so much love, care, and respect. A black woman protag that we could get behind and feel represented by. A smart, strong, caring badass, who still retains her femininity, but who has an identity outside of "mother" even though saving her daughter is her driving force, it's not her only one. She cares about her newly found grandfather and great-uncle. She cares about Rose, despite the woman irritating her in the beginning. She worries for the residents of the nursing home. She has mixed feelings towards the CULT. And of course, her secondary concern is Casey. And once she sees how hard Alan is trying, she comes to care for him as well. Why else tell him he's a hero when she has every right to hate him more than anyone else in the game?
She cares about these people she's met, and she knows they deserve to be saved. And Alan is the first to admit he can't do ANY of it without Saga. If the main character of the series acknowledged Saga, why can't the fandom?
I truly hope that you can find the courage to try again with Andercase, or just Saga in general. Because I'm seeing that there are people that love her, and maybe they're not content creators but consumers, and that's now one of my motivations. To feed their hunger because they're part of the fandom too, and they shouldn't be ignored. I promise you, you'll have a fan in me. And sometimes, just one person knowing they love what you create and how they look forward to it is enough. I'm not interested in a popularity contest. You'll never see me in ship wars. I'm here for FBI Special Agent Saga Anderson. This is her story too, to make her the footnote in fanworks is terribly egregious and goes against the very thing Remedy wanted.
If you ever want to ramble, my inbox is always open. If you ever have ideas you want to see in regards to fanfic for Andercase or Saga, I'm right here. Thank you so much for giving me a chance to read about your feelings for Saga and her partner. It means the world to me.
#alan wake 2#saga anderson#alex casey#alan wake#saga anderson x alex casey#andercase#sagacasey#alan wake 2 spoilers#my thoughts#meta#strong black woman#covert racism#ignoring an amazing black woman protag is a crime#sam lake and the remedy team worked too hard on Saga for her to be erased#the men in this series wouldn't be able to do a damn thing without the women#and Saga proves that time and again#anti CaseyWake#not actually anti but using the tag just in case
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OH GOD, OH GOD XERO, IT'S HAPPENING, EVERYONE STAY CALM-
THIS EPISODE WAS EVERYTHING AND MORE!!!
THIS IS WHAT THE FANS HAVE BEEN WANTING FOR!!!
I am so emotional about this!!!
Eclipse genuinely cares for Earth, no matter, how much he's denying it!
I…I do not have words!
His self-loathing…he sees himself as a monster, for everything he did, sees himself as irredeemable, unworthy of forgiveness…
He knows, he's been a terrible person, and thinks, he's beyond saving!
From the way he spoke, he seemed to ask Earth, indirectly, if she would sacrifice him to get Solar back.
And yet, Earth is still holding on, acknowledging his hurt and showing sympathy and care!
I adored Earth's wonder of morality!
Eclipse has done terrible things to her family, to everyone, except for her!
She should hate him.
He has caused hurt to her family.
He was the catalyst.
And yet…being left untouched by the pain he caused, she can't help but notice his pain.
She understands why he acts like this, she understands, that he has been wronged and hurt, and can't help but reach out!
It's such a moral dilemma, and I really hope, they get more into detail with it, because it's really interesting!!
Earth has such a kind heart, and even Eclipse has been touched by it!
He seemed about to cry, when he left!
Someone sees him, and knows, there are reasons behind his actions!
It doesn't make them dissappear, or justify them.
But he isn't just a monster, he's a person too!
Having someone tell him that, being told, that he can still be better…it would've broken me too!
The one thing I want to point out to it…he's planning to leave to a different dimension??
I don't think, it's by choice, he did mention an agreement, if I remember correctly!
Was it with dark Sun??
And why would he want him to leave??? 🤔
-Stardust
I KNOWWWW AAAAAHHHH ITS SO EXCITINGGG!!!!!!!
I can't even begin to express all the feelings I felt when watching that video its just so GOOD. It's just entirely Eclipse hurt/comfort and it's potentially one of my favorite things in the whole world. LIKE U SAID WITH HIS WHOLE SELF-LOATHING TOO DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTEDDD!!! The way he lashed out after asking Earth why she kept "doing this" was so incredibly telling I can't EVEN UGH ILL START FLAILING EVERYWHERE!!!
AND EARTH. STARS YEA EARTH. Some of my non-tsams friends said it best on discord but it just gets me so emotional that unconditional and persistent love is what makes Eclipse start to crumble. She has been the main one to reach out to Eclipse over and over again, no matter how many times he's bitten her, because she doesn't recoil because she Understands Him like aoayagaahvhhh!!!!
LIKE U SAID, HE'S A PERSON TOO. AND SHE SEES THAT!!!!! BURSTS INTO TEARS
BUT ALSO YEA OMG I almost forgot about that... It could have smth to do with evil Sun, that honestly feels like it makes the most sense next to "he's genuinely just sick of everyone's shit" GJDHWFK
Either way I hope it goes well?!?!! If this isn't influenced by anything greater for fucked up reasons, a whole new fresh start like that sounds like exactly what Eclipse needs but Also like it could be incredibly daunting, yk?? Kinda fascinating......
#asks#anon#stardust anon#honestly it could be a rlly good setup for some domestic eclipse aus i feel like LMAO#BUT UGHHH ultimately this episode is everything. eclipse finally gets love in spite of what he thinks of himself and its so <3<3<3!!!!!!#lunar and earth show#the lunar and earth show#tlaes#tsams#sams eclipse#sams earth#long post
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Newish Comics:
The Flash #7: The Linear Men? The Linear Men??? Si Spurrier, what is cooking in your brain and can you keep giving me a direct line to it? (I mean bringing the Linear Men in a series that also gave us Gold Beetle makes perfect sense because Rip would be so into her but wow. It looks like they've barely been used since Flashpoint too). Also it's fascinating watching the re-establishment of Max and Bart's relationship.
Barry seems to finally have risen out of his ennui a bit, only to notice Something Is Wrong With Linda and then immediately suspect (wrongly) it's Hartley. Still pretty sure Linda's main issue is PPD but it being imposed by an external source is certainly something.
Green Arrow #10: this is another issue that mostly exists for people to hug each other, while Williamson goes 'remember that these people had relationships?' Sean Izaakse's art is just so good in terms of drawing the memory backgrounds so well I can pick out the specific issues and storylines he used as references (Batman + Arsenal shoutout!)
Also, remember when Amanda Waller didn't put bombs in people's heads, she just very occasionally put explosive collars or wristbands on the most dangerous and/or irritating Suicide Squad members? (Like Captain Boomerang?) Because I do. I remember Suicide Squad 1987.
Batman: The Brave and the Bold #11: part of this is me just being contrary, I know, but I am extremely not convinced we are going to see Maps as an active Robin in a main title, given Kerschl is a Gotham Academy creator anyway, and she's currently getting appearances as Meridian over in Birds of Prey. Gotham Academy continuity is only about 1/4 linked to main book continuity. (Someone is going to try and point out 'they appeared in Robin War' or something but it was an active and new title then, and honestly, nobody writing most Bat titles cares about them. It's its own sub universe. Also this story has Bruce dating Isla MacPherson, something I guarantee will not be followed up anywhere else)
Also imagine being called Karl Kerschl and coming to DC to write? How much time does this poor man spend saying "no, not Kesel".
The Artemis story remains amazing and I am fully supportive of it retconning whatever character crimes it is currently trying to excuse as weird.
Also how did we get so unlucky as to have both a Bat Lash AND a Sgt Rock story in this issue?
Amazons Attack #6: and this tied things off nicely! Honestly for an event that didn't need to happen, Josie Campbell did well with it, featured a whole host of Wonder Woman characters that Tom King's barely interacting with, and added to some relationships between characters that needed additional work.
Alan Scott: The Green Lantern #5: I am sure this is a far more meaningful issue if you care deeply about Green Lantern lore. Also DELIGHTED that the JSA team up in this series actually happens on page rather than in the final splash like in Wesley Dodds: The Sandman. (Wesley Dodds is still the best of the three minis to me, but I'm happy here that we're going to get JSA backup).
The Warlord #45: Previously on Lost World of the Warlord (I said I would) Travis set out to find out what had happened to his daughter Jennifer. He goes back to the village of dwarfs and gets his old sword back (since he chucked Hellfire into a lake), and ends up fighting some Cyclops' that took several of the dwarves to eat. Tragically nothing particularly fun happens here (though a skeleton IS tied to a cross, the bondage isn't involving any characters I care about AND it's just a warning threat)
Also something weird went on with the lettering this issue where what I think were script directions ended up as text boxes for all the scene transitions. If it was a stylistic choice on Grell's part it's a particularly odd one.
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Love Just Happens
Never Wrong - Part 16
Characters: The future's Bill Skarsgård and others close to him. The rest is my own characters.
Setting: This story is set in the future but because it's hard to say how the world is then (and it isn't that important for the story) the future is similar to our time now, even with fashion and so on.
Warnings: 18+, age difference, smut, alcohol, ageism, family drama, sexism.
Bill had never met anyone from Aurora’s extended family and looked at the man with surprise. He thought most of her relatives lived in Spain or Boston so he hadn't expected to see her uncle at an afterparty in Hollywood.
“Oh, really? Shit…” he said, with a smirk and turned to the man when he had said goodbye to his other company. He was a bit tipsy and that let his curiosity take over even if he knew Aurora didn't have any contact with them.
“I haven't met any of Aurora's relatives,” he said honestly and looked at the man with fascination. He had short, a bit over styled hair and soft facial features. He had some similarities with Melinda and in that way also Aurora.
Felix laughed a little and wagged his head from left to right.
“Yeah unfortunately it has become that way… I was really young when everything happened in the family…”
The man looked down at the floor sadly and it made Bill feel with him.
“I don't think Aurora cares that much about all of that, she has so many other things to think about,” he said as comfort.
The man looked up at him with a smile.
“Yeah, I heard you have a kid, a girl, right?”
“Yeah, she's seven months old,” Bill said with a proud smile and put down his beer bottle on the high table in front of him.
Felix laughed friendly.
“Lou a mother… She said already at fourteen she wouldn't have children. I believed her, she seemed to be focused on her career. I guess all girls just want to marry and have children if they're really honest.”
Bill furrowed his brows, he didn't believe that but didn't think Felix’s opinion was something to judge him for.
“I think many women choose other things in life and are pleased with that. Aurora…” At first he was going to say it was him who wanted kids but that would sound like he had forced her.
“I think my kids from my earlier relationship made her change her mind. She's really close to them.”
It wasn't really the truth but he didn't know what to say otherwise.
Felix nodded a little.
“I really want to see her, do you think she would be open to that?”
“Yeah sure, but we live in Sweden. Maybe it will be hard.”
“Oh, right, you live in Sweden… Damn, you have really had an impact on her, haven't you?” Felix hit his arm playfully with his fist like they were friends. Bill thought the comment was weird but was also a bit proud over Aurora’s and his life.
He shrugged his shoulders and hid a smirk.
“We fell in love, hard.”
He thought it felt a bit silly to say it but it was the truth. Sometimes the truth was simple and rose tinted.
Felix smiled softly and then took up his phone from his back pocket.
“Would it be okay if I got your number? So maybe we can arrange to see each other one day, with Aurora?”
Bill licked his lips and gave him a doubtful look. He never gave out his number like that.
“Emm… Can I give you my manager's number? He tells me right away when someone has called.”
Felix nodded a bit disappointed and put down his phone on the high table.
“I get it… I might be family but it's the first time we meet.”
Bill made a sound of amusement. He thought it was a silly joke that they were family but Felix looked at him seriously so Bill swallowed the laugh and looked around in the room uncomfortably. Felix clapped his shoulder and shook him a bit to get his attention again then gave him a big smile.
“Arrange something. I really want to meet my niece and her baby.”
×××
Bill had a bad feeling in the car home. They had picked him up ten minutes ago and he knew there was just ten minutes left in the car and during that time he needed to decide what he would say to Aurora. Now when he was alone it didn't feel like it was a good idea that he had talked to Felix, but what else should he have done? It was his wife's relative and there were people all around them. He dreaded telling Aurora. He didn't want a fight, they rarely fought and it always made him have the most awful catastrophic thinking. He hated it when she started to drag her wedding rings up and down her finger, he knew it was an unconscious action but it felt like she wanted to taunt him.
He jumped out of the car and locked up the gate. He walked the long way to the door but even if it was so long it didn't feel long enough. Fuck, she would be mad as hell. This was a wound for both her and her parents and he had stood around laughing with one of the perpetrators. Fuck!
He walked into the house. She had left the light on in the hallway for him. On the bench by the door lay a note with an arrow towards the kitchen in her girly but doodly handwriting: “Bolognese in the fridge. I promise I haven't made it.”
He smiled and dragged his thumb over the little heart she had drawn in the lower part of the note.
He didn't eat, he was too worried for that. He needed to just to get it done. Get the fight done so that after he could do everything in his power to fix the mess.
He went up to the bedroom and slowly took off his suit. Aurora laid on her back sleeping, like always she snored but she was happily unconscious that she sounded a bit like a pig getting strangled. He had never told her that, even lied and said she doesn't snore at all. Sometimes lies are okay. He walked into the bedroom next to theirs where Isadora slept in a playpen. He looked down at her sleeping in the same positions as her mother and he patted her lightly on her stomach. The floral pajamas were soft against his fingers.
“I must tell mamma, right?” He said with a sigh and stood up.
He walked to the bedroom again and crawled down next to Aurora. He smirked when she made that high pitched sound, like a screaming pig. It was her highest note that was everything other than pretty in her sleep. She probably dreamt she was singing.
“Babe?” He said and shook her arm lightly. He just wanted to say it at once. Maybe he had actually started up something again. A feud in her family, again.
She crawled closer to him and laid down on his chest as a habit. He dragged his hand over her back and let his hand crawl down her nightgown to feel her smooth back. He could feel Aurora smirk against his chest and with soft fingers she started to drag her nails just over his boxers’ elastic. He had come home like that before, horny and tired and she seemed to believe it was the same this night. He took a deep breath but it was hard to stop her. Her hand snuck down and she dragged her fingers through his pubic hair. He grew fast and when her hand took a grip around his length he was fully hard. He took several deep breaths but they became strained when she started to jerk him off with a skillful hand. She knew exactly the pressure he wanted and what circle motion that made his toes curl. He smiled and let the feeling consume him. She dragged her thumb over his sensitive tip and spread it out over the blushing head.
“I want your mouth…” he whispered in her ear. He had almost forgotten Felix and knew what would make him disappear completely.
Aurora giggled and watched him pull off his boxers and kick away the cover. He spread his legs, inviting her in between them. He gave her a hooded gaze, just waiting on her being the perfect wife. He loved that she always left food in the fridge for him but a blow job after a premiere was even better. Aurora climbed over one of his long legs to be able to settle between them and then laid down on her stomach. She looked up at her husband but he had shut his eyes and licked his lips in anticipation. When he felt her lips on his pubic bone, kissing down to his length he inhaled deeply. He wanted her to blow him, not tease him and with a grip around his hard on he guided his tip to her lips. It was the alcohol making him so eager but he didn't reflect on it right then and there. Aurora looked up at him amused, he rarely tried to guide her like that.
“Please?” He said painfully and laid his hand on the back of her neck and pushed lightly. She scoffed at him and sat up. Bill looked at her and got at once bad conscience. Had he gone too far?
“You’re acting weird… Is it something?”
Bill shook his head but for a second he saw Felix’s face in his head. He just wanted to think about something else than the mistake he may have made.
“Okay… But if you want a blowjob I will do it my way,” she said with a firm voice. Bill nodded again.
“I'm sorry…”
“You know I don't like that style…”
“I know. I'm really sorry, babe.”
Aurora nodded and gave him a small smile before lying down again. She knew Bill was her soft, kind husband and just because of that she at once started with licking his tip. Bill moaned and smiled to himself. This would make his brain become mush. This would relax him. She sucked his tip but shifted with licking the underside with a harder pressure and slowly she worked her mouth down his shaft. Bill moaned but also let out a pleased laugh when she teased his tip or let her tongue drag over his balls.
When she bobbed her head to make her lips drag over his shaft he laid his hand on the back of her neck again. He looked down again, searching for permission to push her down a bit. He was all for consent and she loved that. She smiled with his cock in her mouth and it made her teeth graze a bit over his skin. The action made Bill jump but he just chuckled softly at it. When she started to bob her head again he pushed her down a bit, feeling his cock sliding down her throat where he could feel its tightness around his tip. He looked down at his girl, working so hard for him, with his precum and her own saliva on her face. She worked so hard for his pleasure…
“Aurora,” said he strained and his voice even broke a bit. He wasn't ready to talk but must. She let his cock go with her mouth but didn't stop working his shaft with her hand.
“Stop for a second…” he rubbed his eyes and sat up. Aurora sat up and looked at him confused.
“It is actually something…”
“Okay?” She said, wiping her mouth and cheeks with her hand awkwardly. It was one thing being so messy in action but sitting having a serious conversation with cum on her face felt a bit unworthy.
“Emm… I met your uncle tonight. Felix? He said he’s your favorite.”
Bill looked at her with searching eyes, especially when her brows furrowed and she looked at him in disbelief.
“Did you talk to him?” She said and moved away from him. She didn't want to hear the answer even if she knew. Bill couldn't understand this.
“Yeah but just shortly… He seemed sad that it is how it is…”
Aurora looked away and shook her head.
“And you believe him? After what I have told you?”
She had told him about how her family had first started to pressure Paolo about money when he started to earn more and then they did the same towards her. They had even done interviews about her to get money.
“No or… I don't know? People can change you know?” Bill felt his heart beat hard. Now it was here, the fight.
“Oh yeah and you are sure he has because he acted like a bro towards you, or what?” He could hear that she was seriously mad even if she didn't raise her voice. He swallowed hard and looked at her standing up and taking her pillow and cover.
“What are you doing?” He said. He could hear how pathetic he sounded and it seemed like she could hear it too. She paused and stood and looked at him with glassy eyes.
“You aren't right all the time. This was so stupid. My mom will hate you, you know?”
Bill sat quietly in bed. He knew he was in the wrong, still he didn't say it. He should just admit it but didn't want to confess he had done something so stupid. If he confessed it, it felt like he said out loud that he was stupid.
“God, you can't even say you're sorry. That's my family and it's my choice what kinda contact I want to have with them!”
“Yeah but I just wanted-” Bill was interrupted by Aurora, who was holding up a finger.
“No. You're my husband, you should be on my side. It doesn't matter what you want.” Aurora shook her head in disbelief and walked away with her bedding. Bill laid down with his fingers pushed into his hair. He didn't want to fight, still it was something that stopped him from saying he was wrong. He pulled on his boxers again and sat down on the side of the bed. He should say he's sorry. He should do that but it felt like he had too little information to do that. He didn't know much about that conflict, maybe it was really silly, all of it? Maybe Felix hadn't done much at all to lose contact with Aurora and her parents. He said he was young when it happened. He tried to put an age on Felix but it was hard. Older than Aurora, younger than himself? It didn't say anything really. He yawned and wished he could go to sleep but wouldn't be able to relax until Aurora was lying next to him.
He walked out of the bedroom to try to find her. First place he looked was the room Isadora was sleeping in and found Aurora in the bed. There was already bedding there but she was probably too proud to walk back with the other bedding to their room.
“Can't we talk about it?” He said with a low voice to not wake Isadora.
“No,” said Aurora sourly and turned so she had her back against him.
“Come on..! I said like five sentences to him.”
He sounded more irritated than he wanted. He had followed her to make everything okay, instead it sounded like he tried to fight.
“What five sentences was that? I guess it wasn't about the movie…” she sounded just as irritated as him.
“We talked…” Bill tried to come up with something to say she wouldn't be upset about.
“Don't pick and choose, just say it.”
Bill moved into the room but sat down on an armchair instead of sitting down on the bed. He looked at Aurora who sat up in bed. She looked at him disappointed and it made him lower his eyes again.
“You know the usual? How life is…”
“Like what?”
“That we live in Sweden… A bit about Isadora…”
Aurora groaned and crossed her arms.
“Did he say anything about his life?”
Bill thought back to the meeting. They had just talked about Aurora and him. He didn't even know why he was there.
“No… We just didn't get to that.”
“Right…” said Aurora, annoyed.
“Hey, give me some slack here. I don't know anything about this fight really, of course it's hard for me to understand why I shouldn't talk to him.” He crawled down on the ground and stood on his knees in front of Aurora. She looked at him sadly but let him take her hand.
“I don't know much either… But my parents have always gotten really upset if anything about their families came up…” She looked at Bill and saw him nod, like he tried to make her question it all. “But that doesn't matter. My mom and dad are my family and I will support them the same way I wish you supported me in this.”
Bill looked at her with big eyes while playing with her fingers. He had known the whole time he was the one in wrong so it was time to say it:
“I'm sorry…” he looked up at her then kissed her hand several times. Aurora moved closer to him, to the edge of the bed, so he could lay his head in her lap and she dragged her fingers through his hair.
“Can't you just say that you were wrong?” She asked softly while playing with his earlobe. Bill opened his eyes and laid a few seconds and just stared. It didn't feel necessary, he had said he was sorry.
“Because you were wrong. You shouldn't have spoken to him.”
Bill turned his head a bit and looked at her with big eyes.
“Can't we just forget about this now?”
“If you say you were wrong. It isn't that hard, Bill. You just say, ‘I was wrong’,” she said and looked at him intensely while removing her hands from his head. Bill made a frustrated sound and smiled unamused.
“Lou…” he gave her a tired look but she just looked at him just as intensely.
“You know it's not that easy…” he said as he massaged his own neck in discomfort. She knew so well what she was doing.
“Just say it, ‘I was wrong’.”
Bill looked around the room. It wasn't really being wrong that was the problem, it was just that he had some sort of image of himself that he was always sensible and Aurora could often make that belief become stronger when she acted so much on her feelings.
“Say it,” she said again but this time with a smirk. She knew it maybe was a bit mean but his belief that he was the sensible of them was irritating.
Bill looked at his wife with big eyes, he kissed her knees then looked up at her again with a pained expression.
“You don't need to be reasonable and right all the time, you know. I love you anyway. Or rather, I love you because of that,” she said and tickled him a little under his chin. Bill took a deep breath.
“I was wrong.”
It was actually not that hard saying it, especially when he saw how big Aurora smiled at it.
He kissed her knees again and she dragged her fingers through his hair.
“Do you know you have a bald spot here?” She said to tease him. Being stupid and bold was probably his worst nightmare.
“Oh shut up, I don't,” he said and looked up at her with a smirk. She giggled and leaned down so she could kiss him through the giggle. He kissed back, deepened the kisses and then looked up at her with his most puppy-like expression.
“Make up sex?”
Aurora looked at him with an amused smirk and stood up. They were close in height when he stood on his knees so even if he became shorter than her he still felt big. She pulled his hand lightly to make him stand up. He looked down at her amused, reminded of their height difference and then lifted her up easily. Aurora smiled brightly and put her legs around his waist.
“I love you…” he whispered while taking her to the bedroom.
×××
To just release a record on your own label wasn't that easy as Bill had wanted it to be and Aurora wondered how she in that moment had got infected by his optimism. She has a record deal. A contract that was renewed every fifth year. There was one year left. First contract between 16 to 21, then the next to 26 and now until she would be 31. It wasn't even a year, it was seven months and that explained why her label was so stressed about releasing a new album. She would be free next year but she needed a plan so they wouldn't force her to do the record they wanted, that would mess everything up because she couldn't stand for it.
She laid on the couch in Sweden, feeling sorry for herself. She also had period cramps that made everything worse. She was whining loudly to get Bill's attention but he didn't seem to hear her.
Bill sat in the kitchen with his trainer on a facetime call and made a schedule for his training until he would start filming in August. He needed to bulk up and his lean muscles needed to be bigger. It wasn't his favorite, especially not after because he had a hard time letting go of the muscles without becoming a bit softer instead.
He had forgiven the trainer for what he had said about Aurora, it was just a stupid mistake but he didn't tell Aurora. He didn't know if he should have but thought it would probably just make her uncomfortable.
Bill heard Aurora whine again and looked towards the living room. First he believed it was Isadora but she was sleeping so it must be his wife making such a sad sound.
“I'm sorry I have to…” he said to the trainer and then turned towards the living room.
“Lou, is it something?” He shouted and heard her say something but didn't hear it all. “Are you in pain?”
He heard her shuffling steps and when she showed up in the door she looked at him with big eyes and a pouty lower lip.
“My pussy hurts…” she whined and dragged her hands over her silky shorts, down over her sex.
Bill cleared his voice and quickly looked down at the laptop screen that stood with its back towards her.
“I need your cock…”
It was universal knowledge sex helps with period cramps but others probably didn't need to hear it like that. Bill felt his cheeks heat while he looked between his wife and his trainer, who tried to hide a smirk.
“Babe… I'm on facetime…”
Aurora's eyes got big.
“Not an interview?” She whispered in panic.
“No, no… Me and Dennis are just making a schedule…” he scratched his jaw and smiled a bit uncomfortable at her. To his surprise she laughed.
“Oh! Okay. Sorry for too much information there, Dennis,” she said with a giggle. “But I've told you my period cramps can be a bitch sometimes,” she said and walked up to Bill and peaked down at Dennis. He could just see her long dark hair hanging down and also how it covered Bill's face.
“Yeah, I know that,” Dennis said with a smile. Bill looked from his wife to the trainer and felt a worry he had had earlier disappear. She was really comfortable with Dennis.
“So babe, help me when you're finished and before Isadora wakes up, please," she said and looked at him behind the computer. She bit her lip and played with her hair seductively. Bill looked at her for a few seconds, feeling a stir in his sweatpants but just nodded so Dennis wouldn't understand what they were doing. When Aurora had tipped away from the kitchen he looked down at Dennis again who again tried to hide a smirk.
“Yeah, yeah I know, I'm a lucky bastard.”
He sighed before they continued to work. It was nice knowing Aurora was so comfortable with their trainer but he also then wondered if Dennis had said something like that to her and if he was the one overreacting. After ending the conversation he searched Aurora up who already sat with a dark towel around her in bed.
Bill smirked a little and pulled off his clothes. He was already hard when he pushed down his boxers and Aurora licked her lips by the sight.
He was a lucky bastard. He really was.
×××
After their shower it was time for Isadora to wake up again. Aurora and her sat on the living room floor while Bill spoke with a friend on the phone. He walked around absentmindedly while talking and laughing loudly, if it wasn't for his friend starting to tell him a long story he would have never heard that Aurora cried in the living room. He paused and pulled the phone away to see if he had heard right, he had but didn't want to stress. She was on her period, the tears could have slipped out for many reasons.
“Sorry, I'll call you back,” he said to his friend and walked to the living room.
Aurora sat with their little daughter against her chest and cried. She kissed her head and then looked up at Bill who stood in the doorway looking at her wondering. Aurora cried through the tears.
“She sat. She sat by herself. Just sat there like a little doll,” she said with a tear drenched giggle.
Bill smiled brightly.
“No? Shit,” he said and sat down on the floor with them. He took Isadora and tried to make her sit again but she whined at once. He wasn't really that surprised, she was always so grumpy if she couldn't decide for herself. Bill laughed at her a little before putting her in his lap against his stomach. He looked up at Aurora amused but saw her tears continue to fall.
“Is it something else, too?” He asked and took her hand. Aurora whipped away the tears and took a deep breath.
“It's the period that makes me all messed up… I just wish my career could be as easy as the home life, you know? We have it so good here… I'm just tired of getting message after message about things I must do… And then the fans that just write "I'm uglier, boring, lazy…”
Bill looked at her with compassion and then pulled her close to him so she could have her cheek against his chest. He didn't say anything, just hugged his girls. He had already said everything he could comfort her with. The only thing he could do to help her now was to try to save her from it all. His wife shouldn't feel like that.
×
#bill skarsgård#bill skarsgard#fan fiction#writing#story#bill skarsgård writing#bill skarsgård fanfiction#love just happens#lou#fiction
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