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argumentl · 3 years

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The Freedom of Expression Ep 7 - Comme Des Garçons, criticism of wigs used in show.

K: This is Dir en grey's Kaoru, with The Freedom of Expression. Um, Last time...Oh, Joe san, Tasai san, welcome. Last time...I don't know if it was that movie's curse, but suddenly, there were technical issues..with the video.

J: The video crashed when we were talking at the end.

T: Really?

K: Yeh. But it happened once at first.

J: Yeh

K: Then after it happened the second time, we re-shot it properly.

J: Yes, we had tried before that, but it crashed again. Only when we were talking about that movie.

T: The second try was the same?

J: Yes, the video crashed.

K: It was only when we talked about that.

T: Scary!

K: *laughs*

J: Up to then, the first three episodes had been fine, but it was only when we talked about Antrum, the movie where you die if you watch it, that the technical trouble happened. And it happened twice. We really experienced that.

Kami: Stop talking about this! *K laughs a lot*

J: Oh, Kami is scared...a cowardly god can't do a night shift by himself, can he?

K: Ok, Joe, the topic this time please.

J: Yes, please listen to this news I found interesting.

"Comme Des Garçons, criticised for 'cultural appropriation' due to wigs used in show."

The Japanese fashion brand Comme Des Garçons have been accused of cultural appropriation, after using wigs of a haistyle often seen on black people, for a white model.

Comme Des Garçons introducted thier male Autumn-Winter collection during Paris fashion week on January 14th. On this occasion, some white male models appeared on the catwalk wearing wigs fashioned in the style of cornrows, which are mutliple small plaits. Criticisms such as, 'Thats offensive', or, 'Japan's avant-garde brands have taken a step back', appeared on social media. Comme Des Garçons have put out the following in response : 'The wigs used in the Comme Des Garçons 2020 male Autumn and Winter collection show were inspired by the look of an Egyptian prince, and were not intended to hurt or offend anyone. We sincerely apologize if we have caused offense'. The hairstylist responsibile for the wigs, Julien d'Ys, responded to the criticism on his Instagram: ' The items worn for Comme Des Garçons were insipred by an Egyptian prince, a style which I found beautiful and inspirational, a homage. It was never intended to offend. If I have hurt or offended anyone, I am truly sorry.' Although this post gained over 2000 likes, it also recieved a lot of criticism.

Well, rather than cultural appropriation, this could be seen as an issue to do with racism. Using a black hairstyle on a white person...there is possibly some anger as to why a cosmopolitan white person did this. I mean, when you think about white culture appropriating black culture, the origin of Rock music was Blues. White bands like The Rolling Stones copied what was originally black music, and as a result rock was born, blues spread...So rather than misappropriation of black culture, you could ask why a black hairstyle was used on a white model is so offensive. What do you think about this, Kaoru?

K: Hmm, well...It looks ok to me.

J: I also couldn't really see a problem..

K: If you think about it rather in terms of spreading culture, how does it seem? It seems like it isn't forcibly connected to black culture. They just want to say that.

J: Ah, about the complaints *1

Kami: Never take away the freedom of wigs.

J: Oh, we've come to the freedom of wigs? The choice of which wig to wear?

Kami: Yes..what type of wig should they wear?

J: Well, yes.

K: It might be like if a white person paints thier face to look like a black person.

J: Oh yeh, they used to do that in American comedies and such, white people would on paint thier faces to imitate black people, and black people were very insulted by this, so it became a problem. Well, if you are in Japan its not easy to understand, but you could say there is still quite a division, a wall...between white and black people.

K: Thats right.

T: What about that group 'Rats and Star'?

J: I don't think that was seen as a problem in Japan. Its because in Japan there were not that many black people here. If they did that in America they would be ridiculed.

Kami: Is painting your face white ok?

J: What do you mean? Painting your face to look like a white person?

Kami: No, painting your face completely white.

J, K, T: Ahh.

Kami: If a Japanese or Asian person did that, they wouldn't be seen as trying to imitate white people would they?

K: Ah, well..thats a good point, they wouldn't really.

Kami: If you say that, it never ends.

J: Yes, i think so.

Kami: So never take away the freedom of wigs.

J : The freedom of wigs *laughs*

Kami: Also never steal wigs.

J: Right...Are you surrounded by many people connected with wigs?

K: Oh, but there were also black models wearing these wigs!

J: Yes, there were..I can't help feeling this is close to an unjust charge...However, what exactly is discrimination/racism? On the one hand, when white people paint themselves, black people call out the discrimination, but racial discrimination is a very complex problem . To ask, 'what is discrimination?', well, im gonna get serious here, 'discrimination' is something that can't be logically explained. For example, in America, university intake is very ethnically balanced. They are raising the pass numbers for Asians, or for black people, so as to maintain diversity. If they didn't, there would be only white people. So they go ahead and lower the number of passes for white people and raise them for black people, or that type of thing, or vice versa. So as for a logical explanation, no one challenges this in America. However, there was that news in Japan last year about lowering pass marks for female entrance to medical school. This could not be logically expained in Japan. For example, whether or not its right, if they had said there was a shortage of emergency staff in hospitals, so we need to utilize more male doctors from now on or something...then there is a possibility it might have been accepted, but actually that situation could not be logically explained. That was seen as total gender discrimination. In this current case, the Comme Des Garçons hairstylist has given a clear explanation, so if you try to pick a fight with that, this will never end. I do not think this is discrimination, I think the people who are saying that are the more prejudiced ones.

K: Yes

Kami: Japan is discriminatory, right?

J: Yes, I think it is. All countries have discrimination, but its become almost taboo to talk about discrimination in this country. Freely talking about these taboos isn't much forgiven by the media, so awareness towards them is steadily slipping away. In America you bump into these issues from time to time, so there are many opportunities for people there to talk about them, for better or worse. In Japan we don't have those opportunities, we don't get under the surface, and we just bury the problems.

T: We (Japan) are really bad at debate.

J: Especially.

T: It always ends up becoming an emotional debate.

J: Yes, it does.

T:....'I hate those guys..' etc.

K: Thats true, yeh.

J: Well, I don't think Comme Des Garçons needed to apologize really.

K, T: Yeah

J: People are quick to apologize these days.

K: Yeah

T: If you have an idea, you should assert it

J: Yes, yes, but they caused discomfort. If I had to say, anything you say can cause discomfort to someone.

K: Yes, i think so.

J: Do you get complaints?

K: I don't, but our office might, Im not sure.

J: Well, but I think art can hurt people, it can cause discord, right?

K: Mmm.

J: It can't be helped really.

Kami: No, but if you apologize, its all over quickly.

J: *laughs* I see. He's keeping it real. Kami, do you apologize when you make a mistake?

Kami: Oh, yes. Like, 'im sorry, im sorry!' *everyone laughs*

K: Even when you didn't do anything wrong?

Kami: Of course...it draws out if you get angry.

J: Well, yes.

K: Ahh, getting angry is annoying, so just apologize.

Kami: Yes, its too much, trouble so i just apologize.

K: How about that?

Kami: But never take away the freedom of wigs.

J: In relation to that right?

K: Okay well...

K,T: Yep

K: Thank you very much, please watch again next time.

T: And please subscribe.

*1 Did i understand this correctly?

*also, ヅラ is wig??

#dir en grey #the freedom of expression #薫 #kaoru #tfoe

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wayward-mikaelson · 4 years

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Come Back pt 5

Word Count: 2130

Pairing: None

Characters: Dean, Sam, Reader, Shifter!Dean and Shifter!Reader

About: While working the shifter case with Dean, the Reader starts to pick up on a few odd things about him. The reader only brushes it off at regret for getting caught cheating. But things turn around when the readers gut instinct gets out of control.

Warnings: Language, Angst, Fighting, and Gore (blood)

18+ Content. You know the Drill. Keep Scrolling if you’re not 18+

A/N: Sorry if this is shorter. I knew it would be shorter but I tired to put as much as I could into it. Any guesses as to what happens? Again if you want to be tagged in the next one, let me know!!

The drive to the police station is silent. Dean tries to make small talk but I continue to shut him down. I'm not ready to talk to him yet. He made a huge douche bag move last night and I'm still trying not to kill him. I could have bailed on the case and gone back to the bunker or completely left and not come back. But after hanging out with Sam last night and laying next to him, I was beginning to about my feelings for Dean. I love him, but we never have actually said those words to each other. Dean and I were constantly having sex and on the nights we didn't, he barely wanted to hang out so I would hang in my room deep in my thoughts. Sam had every chance to get into my pants last night but, he didn't. He was there to comfort me and make sure I ate. He held me when I cried and the just held me. When earlier in the night I thought he was going to off himself for wanting a truce. Then the kiss on my head. That moment sparked something in me that I hadn't felt since Logan. Could I be falling for the younger Winchester?

"We're here," Dean parks the car in front of the station and looks at me. I look at him and see how tired he is.

"Did you even sleep last night?" I ask him pulling out my fed badge. "You look like hell."

"I feel like it. I threw back who knows how many shots until they kicked me out of the bar. Then this morning I find out that you changed room on us," Dean smiles wickedly. "I mean, on me. Because of course Sam knew."

I roll my eyes and get out of the Impala. "Oh for fucks sake," I say tucking my shirt into my pants and tossing my hair up. "Give it a rest. You cheated and you're jealous that your brother comforted me."

Dean gets out. "If you would have waited, we could have talked." Dean goes towards the trunk and opens it. I hear a frustrated sigh and some mumbling.

"What now?" I walk around the car to see Dean just staring at the weapons trunk. "Something wrong?" Dean has his hand balled into a fist.

He slams the trunk. "Theres a small sharp peice of metal on the lock. Got my finger."

That's weird, I think to myself. "There shouldn't be," I say following him into the station. "That's a brand new lock. Custom made out of pure silver."

"I know that!" Dean still sounds super annoyed. "Just forget it."

We walk through the station to the talk to the big wig aka the chief. While we talked to the chief about the case, I can't help but notice how Dean keeps his hand closed. He spoke to the chief in such a snarky way that I had to kick him out of the office just so I can finish talking. When I was finished talking, I thanked the chief for his time and made way to back to the Impala where Dean was laying back.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" I get into the vehicle and smack dean with the files. "You're being such a dick today."

Dean sits up. "So. What."

I scoff. "Okay, you want to talk about what happened. Let's talk about what fucking happened." I toss the files in the back seat and take the keys out of the ignition. Probably the worst idea I ever had. It was almost 95 outside and if I didn't make this fast, we would be sweating. In a not so sexy way.

"You kissed another woman," I say putting my head down. "And not only did you kiss her, you got real handsy with her. I killed me to the point that I contemplated your murder. When I changed rooms I wasn't expecting Sam to be there and be the comfort I needed and I'm glad he was because I don't think he would take kindly to me killing you. This morning seeing you made last night real all over again." Dean stares at me while I talk. "This whole thing has me thinking about if we just fuck buddies or trying to be in a relationship. If we are just fuck buddies, I'm done with it all. If not, then you have some serious thinking to do. So in the mean time, we need to spend time hanging out like going to dinners and drives and such without it ending in sex."

Dean nods his head and holds his hand out for the keys. "Okay," he says as I hand the keys back. "I'm sorry. I want you to know that."

"Don't say that anymore," I say looking out the window. "Show me. And just know I'm not some shiny toy that gets old after use. I'm a fucking goddess and you better treat me like one."

Dean smiles and grabs my hand and kisses it. Thats when I see the small burn mark. "Okay, Sam called by the way. He found a lead. Cabin in the middle of the woods. Wants us to check it out before heading back to the motel."

I agree. While we drive to that cabin I couldn't help but notice a few times that Deans eyes flash a different color. But I brush it over because part of me is still mad and I guess I'm still finding to be upset over. Deans eyes always changed shades in the sun if it hit it right.But that burn on his hand made my gut tell me that something was up. I shake my head again.

"Everything okay?" Dean asks me quickly looking at me. Again, a weird eye color change. My gut starts to scream at me.

"I'm going to call Sam," I say pulling my phone out. "Ask him how his talks went and see what he's up to." I hit send on his number and it goes straight to voice mail. Not odd or anything but my gut tightens. My gut hasn't been like this since discovering the signs that all pointed to Logan being a vampire. I don't leave a voice mail but send a text telling him about my gut feeling. Just as I was about to hit send, the service cuts out. "Shit," I hiss.

"Everything okay?" Dean asks making a turn onto a dirt road.

"The service is gone and something tells me that something isn't right." I look at Dean whos smiling at me. "What?" I look down to make sure my shirt was buttoned all the way. Sometimes a buttons pops and he likes to look at my boobs. Not that I was complaining.

"Oh sweetheart," He takes a hand and places it on my neck. "This was just too easy." Next thing I know, my head is being smacked onto the dash and passing out.

I wake up tied to a chair in an almost empty cabin. My head is throbbing like hell. I look around to see Dean tied next to me. He's looking at me and with a battered face. He looks like hell.

"Are you okay?" He asks in a hushed whisper. "Those dicks came at me from behind the night we got here."

"What?" I ask. "Are you saying that you've been down here this whole time?"

"Yep," Dean says trying to yank. "Apparently the guy that runs the motel is also a shifter and sold us out." Dean stops tugging at the ropes. "Wait, what do you mean 'this whole time?' You didn't sleep with the one that looked like me did you?" Dean looks pissed off and I don't blame him. Someone using his body to do stuff. Kind of personal.

"No," I say tugging at my rope. "I caught shifter you, thinking it was you, kissing some blonde with red lips. I've been pissed about it all day. I thought you were off all day. Now that burn mark makes sense." I hang my hand.

The front door opens and I see Shifter!Dean and another shifter looking like me waltz in. "Oh look, you're awake," the shifter posing at me smiles. "This ought to be good as I sent an SOS to Sam not that long ago. He should be here soon and when he is well I guess we know where that will go."

I look to Dean who looks even more pissed. "Once I'm free," Dean says yanking on the rope again. "I'm going to kill you. Starting with the idiot that used me to hurt YN."

Shifter!Me kneels in front of Dean and takes a blade and runs it along his face. "Oh honey," she purrs. I feel a twinge of jealously as she puts her lips on his ear. "The both of us had a part in playing you."

"Why?" I ask. I needed her to pull away from Dean. "What made you change your game. No one died yet. We could have let you live. We just needed to see what the heck was going on behind leaving the body goop."

Shifter!Me turns to me and I see the same flash of different eye color in her eyes. "Really? You'd let us live?" She laughs. Does my laugh really sound like that? I think. "You're funny. The way we see it is when the Winchester boys and YN YLN stroll through town, the monster or monsters always die."

"But a small few are able to live in peace because of us," Dean says. "Theres a shifter that helps people heal after getting closure from a loved one. Theres a couple werewolves that live in peace eating animal organs and living a normal life. We knew of a few vampires that lived off animal blood. You could let us go and we'd leave you alone if you promise to clean up your mess and no people go missing and end up dead."

The two shifters looked at each other. Shifter!Dean looks at me and then Dean. "Who says we haven't killed anyone?" he asks. "This town is a hot spot for shifters to hid from hunters. We choose a poor victim and remove them and the shifter takes his or her place."

I stare at the shifters wide eyed. "So anyone in this town is a shifter?"

"Yep!" Shifter!Me says happily getting up.

Car door closes outside. I'm about to yell something when Shifter!Dean gags both Dean and I. Shifter!Me walks outside and I can hear talking. They come back in and I'm happy to see Sam. He looks around at both Dean and I. Theres anger and questioning in his eyes. I try my damnedest to yell through the gag. I even add some thrashing around.

"Try not to listen to that one," Shifter!Me says. "She's tried to convince Dean that she's the real deal.

"How'd you guys get them?" Sam asks. "The Dean one looks like he put up a hell of a fight." I continue to yell and thrash around. Sam looks at me and kneel in front of me. He takes the gag off. "What do you have to say?"

"Don't listen to her, man," Shifter!Dean says. "She could lie or something. They killed some town folk. They have to put down."

"Yeah, Sam," Shifter!Me says walking towards me with the silver blade in her in hands. "Shes gotta be put down."

"Guys, shut up," Sam snaps at the shifters. "Just let me hear what she has to say." He turns back to me.

"Sam," I whisper. "They are the shifters. Me and Dean, we are real. Human. The Dean shifter has a burn on his hand from touching the lock on the weapons trunk. You have to believe me. I wouldn't lie."

Sam looks me in the eyes. He looks down and towards Shifter!Dean and spies the burn on his hand. "Okay," Sam whispers. "I'll figure something out. Just hand tight." Sam gets up and the moment he turns around, Shifter!Me throws Sam aside.

"I told you she's gotta be put down," she growls. She marches towards me and grabs my shoulder and thrusts the blade into me.

I look down to see the red blossom of blood flow from my stomach. I don't feel the pain just yet, just the thick, warm wetness trickling down my stomach to my side. From the corner of my eye, I see Dean finally break free from his bindings. Sam gets up and runs towards me. He cuts me loose to lay me down and presses his hand on the wound. That's when I start to feel the pain. I scream out but Sams soothing voice calms me.

Soon, I heart two bodies hit the ground. I close my eyes and know that it's over. I'll be home soon.

@donnaintx @myinconnelly1 @elansaidaris @magssteenkamp @squirrelnotsam

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all-hail-the-witcher · 4 years

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nobody likes a claggy bit of cheese

this idea came to me in mid november while i was watching an episode of the great british bakeoff and crocheting a scarf for my sister while eating a very very healthy college lunch of apple sauce and caramel corn. someone (maybe it was paul) said the word “claggy” and i was like Wow That’s British. and then someone else (probably paul again) said “stodgy” and i was like WoW ThAts BriTisH. and then i was like you know who would appreciate these Very British Words?? my dumb friend who likes to pretend he's british. and thEn i was like Oh Shit what if he hosted great british bakeoff that would be energy oh my god. and i was About to text him that when i was like No Wait! instead of a baking competition it would be a Mac And Cheese competition because that's like,,,his wholes pride and joy. and then i was about to text him that but then i was like wAIT! this has fic written all over it oh my god i can see it now. and now here we are.

also mikey in case you didn't realize, you are my dumb fake british friend and this is your present but i mean its more of your persona slapped on race and i called it a day. its not a mothman shirt but it'll have to do eye guess

anywaymst

enjoy this trash pile

_________

ship: eye guess its platonic ralbert

genre: pure ass crack

warnings: uhmmm, race is an idiot, poorly written british accents, paul hollywood stare, uhhh, albert is Annoyed, jack is an idiot who makes bad mac, spot get Angryyy, idk im writing there before the fic is finished, katherine definitely knows the mafia

editing: lol that's funny

words: enough to fill a few pages but not enough to bore you to death like the metamorphosis

_________

“CHEESE!”

Blankets tornadoed around the room as Race jumped off the bed in a half awake sleepy haze, barely landing on his feet in a fight stance, wielding his phone like a weapon in front of him. He glared into the dark corners (not that he could even tell where the corners were considering that it was pitch dark) of the room before stumbling out into the hallway, muttering madly about cheese.

“Cheese...blue cheese…..string cheese…...mozzarella cheese….” Race barely heard his own half-mad whispers as he opened all the cabinets, rummaging around in the same matter a hurricane floods a basement, in a mad search for pasta. When he came up empty handed he scowled, sat himself up on the counter and yelled for the next best thing:

“ALLLLLLLBBEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRT!”

CRASH! That would be Albert falling out of bed. Race kicked his feet against the cabinet impatiently.

WHOOSH! SLAM! And there was Albert’s door opening and closing at an alarming speed.

THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! The pictures in the living room began to shake, announcing his arrival.

“Race?! What’s going on? Are you okay??” And there was Albert, sliding into the kitchen in nothing but a pair of socks and boxers (despite the fact that it was probably 3 degrees out), weilding a single black converse high top. Race wasn’t quite sure how the shoe was supposed to help him, but he decided to ignore it. He couldn’t afford to get distracted by Albert’s weird antics when there was a legitimate crisis at hand.

“Race…?” Albert asked again, slowly lowering his shoe. “Is everything-” “We’re out of pasta.”

“We’re- what?” The shoe Albert had been holding banged to the floor. “You’re telling me that you woke me up at” he peered at the oven clock over Race’s shoulder, “three fifteen am to tell me that we’re out of pasta?”

“It’s horrible isn’t it?” Race slammed his head into the cabinet behind him. “Now I can’t make mac and cheese!” “W h y do you want to make mac and fucking cheese at three fifteen in the goddamn morning?!”

“BECAUSE ALBERT-” Race jumped down off the counter, “-I had a dream. A dream where I was competing on The Great British Bakeoff and I made my Famous mac and cheese. And Paul Hollywood, the man, the legend h i m s e l f, tasted my humble mac and said ‘Race. That is amazing.’ And gave me a handshake! And I was so honored that I awoke hungry for the wonderful, delicious, creamy taste of mac and cheese. So I wander into the kitchen and what do I find? A fridge full of cheese, but no pasta to be found!” He stepped closer to Albert, planting his hand firmly on his shoulder. “This is an emergency!”

Albert swatted away Race’s hand and rubbed his eyes, already turning back toward his room. “If Paul Hollywood deemed your mac and cheese so amazing then just hold a competition of your own and make other people make mac and cheese for you. That way I don’t have to go to Walgreens at three thirty.” He glanced back over his shoulder. “I’m going back to bed. Don’t make us lose our security deposit.”

Race stood in stunned silence as Albert disappeared down the hall and his door closed.

“That sleep deprived idiot might actually be onto something,” he muttered, launching himself onto one of the bar stools and opening his laptop. He had work to do.

•••

“You know, when I told you to host your own mac and cheese competition I thought I dreamt that entire encounter, and, now that I realize that I definitely didn’t, I especially didn't expect you to make me host it, and I certainly didn’t expect you to make me wear this dumb costume.” He tugged uncomfortably at the dark blazer and black wig.

“Oi mate, if you’re gonna be Sue yew gotta start actin like ‘er!” Race glared.

“But Race-”

“Thas Paul Hollywood to you. I don want none uh this ‘Race’ business,” he crossed his arms and gave Al his best Steely Eyed, Paul Hollywood Glare.

Albert just rolled his eyes and stomped off.

Race sighed happily as he turned to survey the tent in front of him. He had called Katherine last night after his missing pasta crisis and asked if he could use her Dad’s Hampton’s estate to host a mock version of the Great British Bakeoff but for mac and cheese. Katherine, like any good rebellious daughter, had loved the idea and called several of her “contacts” that apparently “owed her favors.” (Race didn’t understand the life of rich people, it seemed very extravagant and two-faced) And that was how Race had come to be standing in a tent with what could very well be the set up of the Great British Bakeoff laid out in front of him with he himself dressed in his very best blue button down and jeans, a spitting image of Paul Hollywood. Well, maybe Paul Hollywood 30 years ago.

His friends that he had invited on to be the contestants of the show were setting up at their stations. There was Jack, Davey, Romeo, Mush, Blink, Finch, Buttons, Specs, JoJo, Spot, Crutchie, and Smalls. Katherine had opted not to participate and instead film everyone to make it seem more like the actual show.

Someone (probably Katherine) had forced Albert to stand next to him to announce the signature challenge that they had prepared.

“Alright bakers-”

Race shot him a side glance.

“-er, mac and cheese cookers?” he tried to amend. “Today Ra-uh, Paul would like you to make a nice, hefty batch of mac and cheese. You may use whatever ingredients you would like, but he would like it to be cheesy, delicious, and contain pasta. You have 45 minutes.” Race could practically hear the sigh in his voice. “On your marks, get set, ba-cOOK!”

Finally, Race thought as his friends scrambled around their respective stations, I’m going to get some good mac.

•••

It was becoming very clear very quickly that Race may not actually be getting any good mac.

He wandered from station to station, Albert following begrudgingly behind him, progressively becoming more and more disappointed in each and every one of his friends. Didn’t any of them know how to cook?

“Roight Jack.” He leaned on the one empty scrap of counter in front of him. “What are yew makin?”

“It’s a surprise.” Jack - well he assumed it was Jack, he couldn’t really be sure with all the flour flying everywhere - ran around his workspace, which was crowded with every ingredient imaginable, from shredded cheese to, was that maple syrup?

“Jack for the sake of the show yew gotta tell us what yew’re makin.” Jack must not have the braincell today.

From somewhere in the flour cloud a timer went off. Jack yelped and dropped what sounded like several pots with an amazingly loud clatter.

“If you really must know - ouch!! - I’m making - god fUCK! - baked mac and cheese with a - SHIT! - crispy top.”

“Alright well,” Albert dodged a flying blob of flaming cheese, “we’ll leave you to it. Hopefully we get to actually eat something edible.”

“Good luck,” Race turned away from Jack’s workstation and leaned towards Albert as they made their way to Mush’s station. “Do we ave a foire extinguishah here?”

“I think so?”

“Good cause we moight need it.” Albert looked at him knowingly for a long minute before the two of them snapped out of it and approached Mush.

“So Mush,” Race said, taking in the polar opposite of the mess of a station that had been Jack’s, “what ave yew got for us?”

Mush smiled, looking up from the block of cheese that he had been grating. “Today I’m going to be making my signature mac and cheese with three kinds of cheese.”

Race let out an audible sigh of relief. Finally something that sounded edible!

“Is that pleasing enough for you, Your Highness?” Mush winked mischievously and Albert giggled.

Race straightened up, checking his mouth for drool (there was none). “Yes, oim looking forward tew it.” He watched as the cheese mush was grating flaked satisfyingly into the bowl, his mouth watering at the very sight and thought of cheese. Oh cheese. Beautiful, rich, delicious cheese. “Oi would like tew sample some cheese if yew don't mind.”

Mush straightened up, putting his hands around his cheese protectively. “And I want someone to slap me so hard my eyes fall out. We can’t all get what we want, Susan B. Anthony.”

“Hollywood, moi name is Paul Hollywood.” Race glared at Mush, horrified that he would decline him the judge a cheese sample! Paul Hollywood always got ingredient samples when he asked for them! Maybe he should have put more effort into his hair today…

“I know very well who you are,” Mush went back to grating his cheese. It was as if he were mocking Race with every bit of shredded goodness that fell onto the glorious cheese mountain.

“I do believe you’ve upset Mr. Hollywood.” Albert smirked. Of course he had to join in on the make-Race-feel-like-hes-being-mocked party.

“I don’t particularly care about Mr. Hollywood’s feelings,” Mush put down the grater and reached under his counter for a pan. “What I do care about is the fate of my mac and cheese so,” he stared at the two of them, deadpan , “be gone Thots.”

“But-”

“I SAID BE GONE THOTS!” Mush pointed a wooden spoon at the two of them menacingly and Race half expected sparks to shoot out of the end like some kind of sorcery bullshit, but all he got was a cloud of flour to the face and twelve sets of confused eyes looking at him.

“Uhh,” he mustered every ounce of Paul Hollywood that he could, “thank yew Mush.” Quickly he turned away, brushing the flour out of his sharpied on beard and mustache while Albert stifled laughter next to him. “Shut up,” he muttered.

“But that was-”

“Oi said shut- oh hoi Smalls!” He tried desperately to regain his composure as they approached the final station.

“Gucci Prada my fuckin clown wig I- oh, uh, hi!” Smalls quickly put the spatula that she had been holding behind her back.

“What are yew makin for uh today?” Race took in Smalls’s station. There was a wide array of cheese on the counter, we well as spices and breadcrumbs and pasta. But something seemed...different.

Smalls looked down at her feet, suddenly very interested in the carpet.. “I’m making gluten free baked mac and cheese.”

“Why gluten free?”

“Because,” Smalls glanced behind her briefly before hissing, “because that was the only kind of pasta I could find in my cabinet that's why you feet fucker.”

Race’s toes tingled with happiness. He do it! He could say the trademark Paul Hollywood meme thing!

“Now, when yew make mac and cheese gluten free it tends to get stickey and lose some of its taiste. Ave yew tested this to make sure that wont appen?”

“Y e s,” Smalls rolled her eyes. “I put extra oil in it so the pasta wont get sticky a n d there’s lots of spices for added flavor.” She brought her spatula out from behind her back in a soldiers salute. “I won’t disappoint you, your Highness Mr. Paul Hollywwod Sir.”

“Yew bettah not,” Race laughed as he walked back to his very official looking director’s chair (he didn’t want to know how many people Katherine had had to kill to get this).

“Sue, how much toime is left?”

“TEN MINUTES COOKERS, TEN MINUTES!”

There were varying screams of frustration from around the room as his friends scrambled to get done. The smell of cooking cheese wafted from several ovens and stoves and Race smiled contentedly. Twas almost Mac Time.

•••

Ten minutes later, as promised, Race was standing behind a Very Official looking wooden table with a fork and a glass of water, ready to taste (or spit out, depending on whose it was), his friends’ mac and cheese.

“Oilright, Davey, why don’t yew bring up yewr mac.”

Davey strode up to the table confidently, somehow without a spec of food on his apron, and placed down a plate of gooey looking pasta. Man oh man he was excited! But no, today he was Paul Hollywood. No excitement. Only glares.

He picked up his fork and took a scoop of pasta, glaring at Davey for good measure as he tasted.

He chewed for far longer than actually necessary to give Davey just enough time to get nervous before giving his verdict. “Whot yew’ve actually done is quite noice, Oi rather loike the blend of the cheddar and the goat cheese, but what yew’ve done is create something that’s so soft that its lacking textah. It’s loike Oi need somethin crunchy to offset it.”

Davey nodded. “Okay.”

“But overall noice job.” He nodded, the silent cue for Davey to take his dish and return to his station.

Race surveyed the contestants and grimaced. “Jack bring yew’re flamin bomb up here.”

He thought he heard Jack mutter some half-decent curses under his breath, but not decent enough for him to repeat.

A few seconds later a lump of orange stuff with green (???) blobs on top on a plate was placed in front of him. “Roight,” he sighed. “What ave yew got there?”

“Well this is my baked mac and cheese with green goldfish topping!” Jack said proudly.

Race looked at the plate as if it were a flesh eating disease that could kill him at any second. And, knowing Jack’s track record with food, it just might. “Any reason why you chose green goldfish?”

“Adds a pop of color!” Jack bounced on his toes.

Good gosh. Race took the tiniest bite possible on his fork and lifted it to his mouth-

“Make sure you get a goldfish!” Jack insisted. “Really adds a burst of flavor!”

“Oh sure, sure.” Race picked one up before shoving the whole abomination into his mouth. He chewed for a few seconds before swallowing down as best as he could.

“Wow that is pitiful,” Race coughed. “The pasta is overcooked, and the cheese, yew’ve cooked it too much so that it’s become gummy, and all the moistah has gone into the goldfish and made them soggy.”

“Oh,” Jack sounded deflated.

“Overall the textah is a bit claggy, and no one loikes a claggy bit of cheese.”

“Right, right.” Jack stroked his invisible beard.

“Overall its dreadful and Oi’d loike it if you removed it from my sights, preferably to the bin. Next!”

•••

Almost a half hour later Race was practically done testing all of the mac and cheese, save for Mush’s and Smalls’s. Along with Jack’s trashpile, Spot’s had also been notably horrible, it was somehow burnt and undercooked at the same time? Race didn’t even want to know. Crutchie’s and JoJo’s though had been surprisingly decent, and both were in the running to win.

“Oilroight Smalls, bring up yewr mac why don’t yew.”

A few moments later a plate of mac and cheese was dumped in front of Race with no class whatsoever. “Here you go Mr. Paul Sir.”

Race stabbed his fork into the pile of noodles. “This was the gluten free baked mac and cheese, roight?” “Yes your highness.”

Race rolled the noodles around on his tongue for a few long moments while his taste buds analyzed the flavor combinations.

“Roight so, I warned yew about this bein tasteless roight?” Smalls quirked up her eyebrow. “It’s tasteless isn’t it.”

“Yes. Get it away from me at once.”

“Of course, your lordship.” Smalls snatched the plate from the table, even curtsying to Race before making her way back to her station, picking up a fork, and digging into her own mac and cheese.

“I don't know what you’re talking about Mister Colonel Hollywood Sir, this tastes great!”

Race bushed imaginary crumbs off of his table. “And Oi’m goin tew pretend Oi didn’t hear that.” He pointed to Mush. “Mush, bring up yewr creation, if yew pleathe.”

“But of course!” Mush placed down his plate of mac and cheese in front of Race, who dug in immediately. “What you have there is parmesan, cheddar, and american cheese with elbow pasta. Enjoy.”

Race let the glorious noodles glide over his tongue as his palate was enveloped in a wonderful cheese flavor. He was amazed. He was astounded. Hell he was even speechless! What did Paul Hollywood do when he was speechless? Oh right!

“Well done Mush,” he stuck out his hand for the famous Paul Hollywood Handshake. “That’s a really great plate you’ve made.”

“Oh, thank you sir!” Mush smiled joyfully as Albert tried to sneak a bite of the mac and cheese. Race swatted his hand away with his other hand.

“In fact, it’s the best that Oi’ve had today, and Oi announce yew as Star Cooker!”

The room erupted into cheers and everyone ran to hug Mush while Race quickly finished his mac and cheese. His plan had worked perfectly. The next time he was out of pasta at three am he knew exactly who to call.

•••

“Hello? Do you need help burying the body?” A tired voice answered the phone.

“Mush, it’s Race. I’m craving mac and cheese and I don't have any pasta. Can you-”

“NO!”

_________

so how bout that huh

anyway sappy boi hours heh i love mikey and im real happy that were friends cause he's the absolute best and i cant wait to meet him next week eeee

feedback is always appreciated hmu to be on the tag list

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#saphie scribbles #newsies #newsies fic #ralbert #racetrack higgins #albert dasilva #this is not a christmas fit its just a christmas present #*fic #heh #luv you my milky tot #;)#grandpapi #papi #suburban papi #oatmeal aesthetic dad #daddy #cricket feet #u make my feet tingle with happiness #SIX DAYS MAN

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cyborgraptor · 5 years

Text

haunted house thrill ride minus the haunted house

Last night my brother, his wife, and me both left rather late to see if we could make it last minute to a haunted house an hour away from where we live to Ft. Worth, TX. People might already know the attraction called Cutting Edge, as its been going on for years now - the last time we went to it was 12 years ago. We wanted to see how it was now, and it has a somewhat decent rating. We remember there was bubbles at the end that COMPLETELY soak your clothes and nearly smothers you, so we checked reviews to see if they still had it. It does, but there’s a bubble-less route so you can avoid it. But, the end of this review had us curious.

(Parking was 15-20$ we read on the website, too.) Anyway, we drive down there. Immediately get sad spotting the homeless population taking up entire large sidewalks as we enter downtown. Arrive at 12:15, and the attraction ends at 1am. We knew there’d be a line since it was a semi-chill night thats good for big crowds. Buuuuuuut we weren’t expecting to see around 500 people ass-to-ass wrapped in a tight line in the parking lot 45 minutes till closing. So we said “Fuck that shit, lets find a cool late night dinner place while we’re in down here”. Regret. My brother remembered there was some ice cream place they went to while they were here some time ago down some main street. Quickly figured out that street was closed off, like some parade/party just recently happened, but there was nothing but a bar open down the street and a security golf cart picking up cones. We figured we could get on our feet and walk further down the street to see if we could find it that way, as there was a lot of hidden buildings. So we park the car, get out, and go to a street corner to look around. Across the street, we saw a woman face-down against a curb to a shop, totally looking like a dead body. Two men were slowly trying to help her up to get in their car. The three of us looked at each other like “Uh oh” and looked back behind us down the street if there was possibly more fucked up people like her, of if someone else was noticing us watch that. Then we heard a scream, and the woman was sprinting full speed out of the parking lot. She stopped suddenly and the men ran over to her, and then she started laughing loudly instead. Okay. Hopefully...............she was just on drugs............????? And then the two men had to lift her like a couch back into the car. We stared at each other again and said “Okay time to go!” and then nearly stepped in vomit on the sidewalk as we turned back to our car. But it doesn’t end there!!!!!!!!!!! We were still starving, so we googled some late-night diners nearby instead. It was either ramen or this place called Ol’ South Pancake house (you can google it if you want). The website makes the place look cute and homey. Our decision to go there was solely placed to get chips and salsa based on what my sister-in-law read on the website, but I think she read the wrong thing. We get there. Pretty crowded. The air inside smelled like cigarette smoke even though it was a non-smoking store. There was a group of eight people in front of us COVERED in fake blood, probably(hopefully) from the Cutting Edge place. A very..........interesting looking waitress hobbles over to us after them to seat us at a table that would make claustrophobic people explode. Then we get......her. The other waitress. She seemed like a sweet elderly woman, at first. Not white hair, but grey, and pretty in-fit for her age. We asked about the salsa, and she squinted at us and said they only had potato chips (which is probably true). We looked at each other and ordered some fried pickles instead. She then nodded slowly and said “Surrreee thiiiinnnnng,” and then gave my brother a face similar to this.

So we’re probably going to get food poisoning. The pickles were good, at least. While we were eating, a group of college-age people sit next to us. One guy was in normal clothing, while his two other friends were in costumes (another guy and a woman). Chucky, the killer doll man, was next to me. The two of them were veeeeerry obviously on something. My first interaction with Chucky was when I was drinking coffee, a red wig suddenly landed in front of me. “O---OOOPSSSSS!” Chucky said next to me, grabbing the wig and dropping it several more times. Our trio just laughed awkwardly. He then tossed it behind me in my chair, and thats when his stable friend said “Hey bro what the hell are you doing, man?” Which, I think, prevented Chucky from groping my ass, and he quickly grabbed his wig back. Then he and his costume GF (assuming) got up to go to the bathroom. They cut through the open kitchen and we could see the staff get startled. While that happened, an old man walked into the section of the diner that was blocked off. We were confused as hell, but another waitress started serving him food in there. Maybe they knew him or something, who knows. But. Do you know where that cut-off door looks out to for the old man to watch?

Haha, it’s to us! Making direct eye contact to me at all times!!!! Oh boy!!!

So now we have a guy with possible dementia over there, and Chucky and his GF come back (through the kitchen, AGAIN) on our right. A staff member comes to their table saying they need to not go through the kitchen ever again. The sober friend is obviously dumbfounded but does nothing but giggle and shake his head. THEN the GF gets up and leans to our table, saying “What are you guys doing tonight?” completely in our personal spaces. Sister-in-law leans back to her to quietly say “What are you guys on?”. The woman kind of shakes her head and replies “Oh just weed. Just a bit of weed.” Smiling HUGE while saying so, but also in a bitchy way. Chucky encounter #2 happens. While his GF was leaning to and fro, he hissed right into my ear, actually making me jump (but not scream). We all laugh awkwardly again. At this point, its better to deal with them than start a huge commotion and possibly make them rage, because the people around us are already keeping an eye on them for all of the shit they’ve stirred already. #3. Shortly after he says “I’m Chucky, the killlleeeeerrrrrr....” and starts pretending to bite the air next to me. That quickly turned to him trying to bite my shoulder. I barely felt anything, and tried to keep inner peace until his friend yelled at him again to stop. There was no teeth-sinking, but I felt a wet mark after he stopped. My brother said he looked like this.

Well. We finally got our food. I got steak and eggs, my brother got a burger, and sister-in-law got a pancake thing with peaches in it. Right after the teeth waitress placed the pancake thing down, she suddenly said, “Wait, there’s no butter on this! You gotta have some butter on it to make it good!” What does she do to solve this, you ask? Simple!

She takes our silverware, takes a plastic cup container of butter from our condiment rack, and starts going to town stabbing and smearing the butter into the once-nice looking pancake thing! For a full 30 seconds in silence! “There you go!” she says with her full rack of fake teeth, and walks away. My brother had to laugh behind his napkin while she was doing it, and so did I. #4. A pancake suddenly lands on my plate after I got done eating the obviously once-frozen steak. Chucky said nothing this time, but his sober friend just shook his head. But after Chucky tossed his last two pancakes on our table, sober friend tried to stop him - in doing so, sober friend accidentally pushed his own plastic cup of cheese on the floor. “Awwww man, look at what you made me do bro!” He sighed seriously. Sober friend then asked teeth waitress where his bacon bits where at, and all she did was look over at their own condiment rack and pointed, “Right there,” and walked away. Sober friend didn’t only spill his cheese, but he spilled his bacon bits onto the rack, too. Costume friends got up to walk outside after that, and we sympathized with him saying “Damn, she’s brutal.” Oh, and by the way, dementia man has still been staring at us the whole time. We’re completely done eating now, and whisper to each other “We need to get the absolute fuck out of here.” We pay at the entrance/exit, and walk outside. What we see is what we believe Chucky and his GF fucking in their car parked to the side of the store. The windows were steamy and only saw his head sticking up. “Time to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!” I chanted again, as we got back in our car. Dementia man walked out of the diner after us, but luckily, he didn’t see what car we got into. It still doesn’t end there. We cut through the empty streets back to where we got into the city. It was 3:40 am at this point. My brother saw a cowboy sitting at an empty light corner. GOTTA LEAVE! Five minutes later we enter the expressway. Three minutes go by. My brother is cranking up the music to stay awake for the hour long drive back home. But then I see it. Something bright down on the highway below us to our left. We’re passing by and my brother doesn’t notice. “F...........fire. FIRE. THERE’S A FIRE.” “WHAT?”

He stops on the completely vacant road and we back up a little to see it. Yup. Thats a fucking burning car.

We camped there for about 10 minutes until even one cop showed up, then finally a firetruck. Normal people pulled over initially to direct traffic with the flashlight on their phones. All four of the tires popped loudly as they burned. And while the hose was dousing out the flames, a semi-explosion happened. Sounded like a firework, and was very bright, but nothing shattered and debris didn’t rain down anywhere. We finally decided enough was enough and we got the fuck out after the flames got controlled. I’m happy to say we made it home safe without any other bullshit occurring to us. But What. A. Fucking. Night.

#long post #I'm not putting this under a read more #originally from twitter but how the fuck am I writing this on there

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dvp95 · 5 years

Text

can’t breathe when you touch my sleeve - chapter 10

pairing: dan howell/phil lester

rating: e

warnings: none

tags: alternate universe, slow burn, fluff & humour, tiny bit of inner turmoil wrt sexuality but trust me it’s not that deep, deeper than anticipated but still not that deep y'all this is primarily silly, eventual smut, idiots in love

word count: 4,286 for this chapter (45,795 total)

summary: Dan keeps making a fool of himself in interviews, to the point where it’s basically a meme. Now he’s got to sit down for the better part of an hour and sell his show to the YouTuber he’d had a massive crush on when he was a teenager.

read from the beginning on ao3 or on tumblr!

read this chapter on ao3 or here!

"Daniel?"

Dan blinks. He blinks again, zoning back into the conversation he's supposed to be a part of.

"Er," he says, sheepish. "What was the question?"

"Are you sure you're feeling okay, Daniel?" the woman asks - the interviewer asks, fuck, this is like the sixth time he's asked her to repeat herself. "I heard you were ill yesterday, weren't you?"

He wasn't. But that is what Jaime and Patrick had sworn up and down to anyone who asked, because they're good partners in crime like that. They look like they regret it now.

"Yeah, Daniel," Jaime says, stressing his name in a way that makes Dan think she's one more fuckup from smacking him in the back of the head. He'd probably deserve it, at this point. He can't remember being this scatterbrained in his whole life, and that's saying something. "You sure you're okay being out of bed?"

The word 'bed' gets stressed too, just a bit, and Dan feels a flush creeping up his neck.

It's honestly unreasonable how he can't seem to focus on the task at hand, which is answering softball questions about the show he's worked on for three years, because his mind keeps drifting back to Phil.

Phil, who he'd left in bed with Thor, all sleepy noises and grumpiness at Dan needing to leave. Phil, who has the day off and might still be mostly naked and lazy while he waits for Dan to come back. Phil, who he only has three days left with.

Three more days in London. Two sleeps. And Dan has shit to do every single goddamn day of it.

This is a work trip, technically. They've got a handful of interviews the next two days that couldn't be scheduled for their first London stretch, and then they're going to France. That's exciting, it is, a mark of success that Dan never expected for himself, but right now he's frustrated by anything that cuts into the time he could be using to kiss Phil.

Dan is so busy remembering how Phil's mouth had felt against his that he forgets to answer the question. He can practically feel his eyes glaze over.

"Daniel," Patrick says, audibly exasperated.

It takes a lot to get Patrick to that point, so Dan ducks his head and mumbles another apology.

"He's fine," Jaime tells the very nice and concerned interviewer whose name Dan has long forgotten. "He's just got a lot on his mind right now and he's really shit at multitasking."

"Hey," says Dan. It's a weak protest.

The interviewer is a tall woman with kind eyes that crinkle into laughter lines when she smiles at him. She's dressed casually, has a denim jacket with patches and pins all over it, and Dan feels his eyes linger at the rainbow on her pocket.

What is that like? To be so certain and so confident that you can wear it on your sleeve even in a professional environment? Dan doesn't know that he'll be able to get there.

He wants to compliment her on it. It's the same urge he had in the restaurant with Phil's family, vocalizing that he wishes he could wear more nail polish. The same swirling anxiety of being judged for it follows quickly, but this time it's amplified by the recording device in the interviewer's hand, the knowledge that anything he says right now will be analyzed to death later.

Dan wants to live authentically, and he wants to get to a place where he doesn't need to hide, but he's frustrated by the reality of how much progress that's going to take. It's not going to be easy, it already hasn't been, and it's never going to stop.

Even with making a name for himself and having an audience, Dan knows that coming out publicly still won't stop strangers from making assumptions about him or demanding an explanation for the women he's been seen with. He'll have to come out over and over and - it's scary. It's really scary.

The compliment catches in his throat. He can't say it to someone recording him, no matter how kind her eyes are. He hasn't even told his grandma yet.

"I like your jacket," he says instead. He feels like a coward for it.

"Thanks," the woman says brightly, looking down at herself and tapping one of her bigger patches. "Customized it myself, obviously. It's a wee bit more colourful than you like to be seen in, right?"

The casual chirping helps Dan relax, reminds him that this is a laid-back interview with easy questions. Nobody is shining a heat lamp on him and asking for an expose on how he spent part of last night inside of another man.

He grins and shrugs. "Yeah, alright, I wear a lot of black. Sue me. I can still think colours look nice on some people."

Great. Now he's thinking about Phil again.

"Like Jaime," Patrick offers, tugging at one of Jaime's bubblegum braids. Dan still can't tell if it's a wig or not, but she smacks Patrick's hand away like it's her own hair.

"That's true," says Dan. "Jaime wears as much black as I do, though, I dunno that she's the best example."

Patrick nods, solemn. "At least her hair is interesting."

"Oi, fuck you. Sorry," Dan adds sheepishly. Even though this is an online print interview, he still feels a little bit of shame whenever he slips up and curses during an interview.

The woman - Cara? Catherine? Camilla? Ca-something? - just laughs and waves his apology off.

With an ease that Dan can't help but notice isn't quite as practised as Phil's, the interviewer moves on to questions about their other cast members. While they don't have any trouble making fun of each other, it's even more fun to exaggerate stories of people who aren't here to defend themselves.

Dan tries so hard to participate. He does. He laughs in all the right places and gives Jaime grief for not remembering something right, because he's given this poor interviewer nothing of substance. The thing is that Jaime is better at telling stories and Patrick is so dry and stoic with interrupting jokes that Dan knows he isn't needed for this. He lets them bicker over a story detail that he's long forgotten and feels himself start to zone back out.

He listens to Patrick's slow timbre, Jaime's trill of a laugh, and lets his mind drift back to where it wants to be.

Even though it's tempting, Dan isn't stupid enough to text Phil in the middle of doing his fucking job. He has to resort to checking his phone between interviews and pictures, getting more and more pouty about the lack of response to the things he's sending throughout the morning. Phil must be having a lie-in, because it takes him a couple of hours to even see Dan's texts.

ugh i should have just stayed in bed

pls send thor pics

and you pics but like give me a heads up if your dick is out im at work

i dropped my coffee on jaimes lap fml shes gonna kill me

im just so distracted lmaooo

canft believe youre just asleep thats so rude

Oh nooooooo. I always cry over spilt coffee :( you want me to bring you one? I can come hang out for lunch!

The sweet text is accompanied by a photo of Thor asleep on the sofa, his little head pillowed on Phil's knee. Phil is wearing Dan's pyjama pants and - it's hard to tell for sure, with the way the photo is angled, but Dan thinks he's got the Friends shirt on. Frankly, that should be gross. Dan wore that shirt for way too long for it not to smell like, well, his sweat, and that is objectively not sexy.

Dan feels gooey warmth spread from his stomach outwards, anyway. Maybe it is gross, but it makes him happy to think about Phil's shirt smelling like him the way that his own Yeezy shirt still faintly smells like Phil. He covers his mouth with a hand so nobody milling around will see him grinning like an idiot.

thats ok, Dan texts back one-handed. yall look comfy you should stay. i'll b back for dinner and snuggles ok?

Ok! ^_^

God, but Dan wants to be there now. He wants to be the one cuddled up with his head in Phil's lap. He recognises that it's very stupid to be jealous of a dog, but he isn't going to let that stop him.

"Hey, Howell." Patrick's voice interrupts the daydream of slender fingers carding through Dan's hair.

Dan blinks. He blinks again, looks up.

"I didn't even see you sit down," Dan tells him, bemused. They're sharing a bench in the building's lobby, not wanting to go too far in case they need to go back upstairs for more photos during the short break in their day.

"Yeah, you're on another planet," says Patrick. Dan wishes he could argue that fact. "Things went well with your whole Love Actually emergency, then?"

The reference pulls Dan up short. He feels his brow furrow as he walks through the entire film in his head. "What are you talking about? None of this happened in Love Actually."

"It's British, isn't it," Patrick says nonsensically.

"I don't," Dan starts, but then he gives up. He and Patrick are close as coworkers - friends, even - but Dan never quite understands the links that Patrick's brain makes. "It went well. It went really well. I don't know if Jaime told you everything I texted her, but I like... fully ended up meeting the family."

Patrick's eyebrows raise slightly. That's quite a reaction, from him. "You met the parents? Bro. You just started dating."

They're not in an overly crowded area, but people keep waking by them on their way in or out of the building, so Dan is pleasantly surprised to discover that Patrick can play the pronoun game, too.

"Yeah," says Dan. He doesn't want to get into the mix-up right now. He's sure that Patrick will have another incomprehensible reference when he hears about it. "But it just feels... I dunno. Right? In a way other people haven't? Maybe that's obvious."

"It's not obvious," says Patrick. He's snapping a hair elastic around his wrist idly, the gesture something Dan had thought was an expression of annoyance or frustration when they first met. Dan knows now that it means Patrick is tired, that he wants to shove his hair off his shoulders and stop it from tickling his neck. They're only halfway through their day, though, still a couple of photoshoots to get through, so he can't put his hair up just yet.

Dan knows so much about these people. He's learned it all from such close proximity for the past three years, but he also genuinely likes spending time with them. He feels, suddenly, very guilty for wishing cancellation on this thing they've all worked so hard for.

"Sorry," Dan says.

"For what?"

He doesn't really know how to voice it. He shrugs. "For being a shit coworker right now."

Patrick gives him an indecipherable look and shakes his head. "Daniel," he says, "you're not being a shit coworker."

"I kind of am, though," says Dan. "Like I can't focus at all, I'm missing interviews, and I... I don't know how much I want to go back to Atlanta. Is that bad?"

"Why would that be bad?" Patrick hums. "This is your home."

Home isn't an easy concept for Dan to wrap his head around. He hadn't had a happy one for most of his life, hadn't been able to find somewhere that felt quite right ever since he escaped that. So it's a little disconcerting when Patrick's words settle into his chest and feel like indisputable truth.

"London is home," Dan echoes, wondering it it feels just as right coming out of his own mouth. It does. His head is spinning, a bit.

"Yeah," Patrick says, like it's that easy.

Dan gives himself a little shake back into the present. He smiles, wry. "Still, I probably shouldn't be crossing my fingers under tables for the producers to shut us down."

For a moment, Patrick looks confused. Dan is all ready to apologise again, shove those feelings down, but Patrick just says, "So negotiate your contract. You know that you aren't required by law to see the show through to the end, right? You can just not come back for season four, or only come back for a couple episodes instead of a full season."

They're sat in a fairly public area, with other people walking about, but Dan could hear a pin drop in the shattering silence that rings in his ears at Patrick's use of logic.

"I," says Dan, "did not think of that."

Patrick nods. "You kind of tunnel-vision sometimes, has anyone ever told you that?"

By the time Dan returns to Phil's building, he's talked himself into and back out of quitting his job a dozen times. It's a dumb decision, but not much dumber than simply waiting for someone else to make the decision for him.

He decides to call Amy when he's in France and talk the options through with her. She's already looking for potential gigs in the UK for him, so hopefully the conversation isn't going to come as much of a surprise to her. The last thing he needs is for his agent to get upset with him over making changes in his life.

Dan's head is buzzing with it, loud enough to give him a headache. He texts Phil that he's outside and waits to be let in. He gets an intrusive domestic fantasy of letting himself in with his own key, and reminds himself to rein in this U-Haul bullshit.

"Hey!" Phil beams as he opens the door and steps back for Dan to come in. Other people live on the other floors, but Phil still leans in for a long kiss the moment the door closes behind Dan.

It sends sparks up Dan's spine and quiets some of the unending noise in his head. He sighs, leans into the kiss, wraps his arms around Phil's waist to pull him even closer.

He's cognizant of where they are, though, so he pulls back to rest their foreheads together after a moment. "Hey yourself."

"Did you have a good day?" Phil asks, his tri-coloured eyes bright and unguarded.

"Yeah, but it's better now," says Dan. He's parroting what Phil said to him yesterday, and he can tell that Phil recognises it from the little smile on his face. "You look nice. You showered just for me?"

Phil laughs and tugs at Dan's wrist, pulling him down the stairs. They've got four left feet between them, honestly, so it's a miracle nobody takes a nosedive.

"Yeah," he says as they narrowly avoid any number of broken bones. He presses Dan against the wall next to his front door and grins at him. "But it was also for the judgey moms at the dog park. You look nicer, you didn't take the makeup off?"

To be honest, Dan had forgotten it was even on his face. He settles his hands on Phil's hips and smiles. "They made me look like the best version of me, why would I erase all their hard work?"

"Mm, you do look pretty," Phil says, and Dan is lucky to have his back against a wall. His knees might have actually buckled at the praise if he was unsupported.

"Pretty, huh?" Dan asks. He tries to keep his tone dry, like it's a big joke, but Phil's big eyes just see too much.

"Very pretty," says Phil. Dan doesn't know how to handle being complimented by Phil's deep, sincere voice, but he isn't given much of a chance to react before Phil is speaking again. "But I don't know that I'd call this the best version of you. You looked really nice when you came, y'know."

"Fuck, Phil," Dan laughs, a little breathless. "I was literally gone for ten hours."

"Ten hours too many," Phil grumbles.

Dan laughs again, but he has to admit that Phil has a point. The day had absolutely dragged on with the knowledge that his probably-boyfriend was waiting for him.

"You wanna go inside, then?" Dan suggests, running his thumbs just under the hem of Phil's clean shirt. "I'll do a lot of things, but this floor is cement, mate. I'm not blowing you out here."

The giggle that's surprised out of Phil makes Dan smile so wide it hurts his cheeks. He smacks the center of Dan's chest lightly and steps back to let them both into his flat. "I was thinking we could, like, order dinner first or whatever, but I'm not going to complain if you want to switch up the itinerary."

"The itinerary," Dan mocks, looking around for a ball of fluff running directly at them as he struggles with his shoes. "Uh, where's Thor?"

"Uh," says Phil. There's colour high in his cheeks that he tries to hide by flopping onto the sofa. The sweats he stole off of Dan don't really leave much to the imagination at all, not when he's sitting like that, and Dan almost loses his balance when he stands up straight. The pink doesn't leave Phil's face, but a knowing smirk joins it. "He's in the bathroom."

Dan's heart skips like an old CD player and he laughs to mask just how fond he is. "Uh huh, and here you are acting like you were really ordering food first."

"Well," Phil says, his smirk growing, "we could still order first, it'd be at least twenty."

"Sounds like a challenge," Dan hums, coming around the sofa to sit on the other end and lean forward, kissing the sliver of skin where Phil's shirt is riding up. "Why don't you do that, and I'll go get a bloody condom."

Phil blushes, proper blushes, and pulls a packet out of his pocket. "Ta-da," he jokes, weakly. "For my next trick -"

"If you say you're going to make your penis disappear," Dan says, flat, "then I'm walking out."

They just look at each other for a long moment, like a staring contest neither of them initiated, and then Phil snorts. That sets them both off and soon enough they're laughing, Dan's nose tucked against Phil's hipbone and Phil's hand over his mouth.

"I wasn't going to say that," Phil insists, still giggling. "I wasn't."

"Sure you weren't." Dan grins up at him and slides up his body, a little less graceful than he'd imagined it in his head. He presses their smiles together and licks into Phil's mouth. A little noise passes between them when Phil's hands find their way into Dan's hair, but Dan isn't sure which of them it comes from.

The giddy feeling of laughter doesn't leave Dan's chest. He lets it make a home there as he trails kisses all over Phil's long, pale neck. He doesn't need to guess when Phil likes something - he squirms and makes these little huffs of noises, grip on Dan's curls tightening just a bit before it loosens again. It feels impossibly powerful to learn how to take Phil apart like this, like they're teenagers snogging on the sofa in their first relationship.

It's strange that this does feel like a first relationship for Dan, in a lot of ways. He loved his first girlfriend and cared about other women he's dated, but it's not the same at all.

Finally, Dan is allowed to feel all the things he's supposed to have felt when he was younger. He's allowed to let budding affection and lust and friendship all wrap up in one person.

"So, the piercings," Dan murmurs, letting his hand slide up Phil's shirt to toy with one of them.

"What about them?" Phil asks. He already sounds impatient and needy, like he had last night, and the sound of it goes straight to Dan's dick.

Dan laughs and sits up, helping Phil get his shirt off over his head. "I mean, do they do things for you? Do they feel good when I touch them? How do you want me to touch them to make them feel good?"

"Do you always ask this many questions during sex?" Phil asks, dry.

There's no point in lying. "Yeah, I tend to babble." Dan gives him a winning smile and taps at Phil's hips, a silent request for him to lift up. Phil does happily, arching up for Dan and letting his stolen sweats get tugged off. "Guess you'll have to shut me up somehow."

Phil laughs, muffling the sound of it with his palm, and shakes his head. He looks so fucking gorgeous like this, giggly and naked and starting to get hard against his thigh. Dan has no idea how he got this lucky.

"That's such a terrible line," Phil informs him, grinning wide. He doesn't seem bothered by Dan being dressed when he isn't. He just settles back against the cushions and wiggles a bit, either trying to get comfortable or just teasing Dan. Either is possible at this point.

"It's not a line," Dan protests, shrugging his jacket off and settling back between Phil's legs. He presses his mouth to Phil's soft tummy and, unable to help himself, blows a raspberry.

Phil kicks out at him, instinctive, and his tongue is trapped between his teeth as he tries to hold back giggles.

"My nipples aren't sensitive," Phil tells him, voice wavering with some combination of amusement and arousal. He drops a hand to wrap around his own cock, thumbing at the metal on the tip of it. "This is. It, like, tugs. It's nice."

Biting back a groan at the sight, Dan digs around for the condom. He impatiently knocks Phil's hand out of the way to get him hard enough that he can roll it on. The piercing just above his balls settles nicely at the bottom of the latex, almost like it's holding it in place. Dan rolls it between his fingers, watches Phil's eyes flutter closed. "And this one?"

"Not as much. Still good, though." Phil's tongue darts out to lick his lips, and Dan grins at the unconscious reminder of what he's meant to be doing.

It's not the most comfortable for them to be laid out on the sofa like this, lanky as they are, but Dan isn't nineteen anymore. His knees do not hold up the way they used to. He wraps his hand around the base of Phil's cock and lets the tips of his fingers idly play with the metal bar as he finally gets his mouth on Phil.

Dan isn't used to the taste of latex accompanying a blowjob, but it isn't unpleasant. He gives Phil a couple of long licks and then sucks lightly at the head, not sure how much pressure Phil likes yet.

That's something he thinks he'd love to learn. He wants to know everything about Phil's body, wants to make him tremble with it.

Dan is extremely offended when he glances up and sees that Phil is tapping something on his phone, but the offense settles when Phil huffs a laugh and says, "Put in for takeaway. All yours, now."

The phone gets put down and Dan tongues at the bump of Phil's Prince Albert ring through the condom. That makes Phil's breath hitch, his hips jerk just a bit.

It's been years since Dan has had a cock in his mouth, but he likes to think it's like riding a bike. He takes Phil deep, hollows out his cheeks, repeats any motion that makes Phil let out soft groans. He forgot how much he likes this, fuck.

Much like everything else, it's somehow impossibly better with Phil.

Phil keeps a hand in Dan's hair and braces the other on the back of the sofa, breathing hard, and Dan doesn't want to close his eyes and miss a fucking moment of this.

"Fuck," Phil breathes, and Dan responds with an answering moan around his dick. "Yeah, alright, that's - fuck, Dan, you feel so good, look so pretty like that."

The praise still makes Dan shudder. He sucks Phil harder, feeling the weight of Phil's cock on his tongue as he speeds up his movements.

Dan remembers blowjobs to be pretty fast. He also never gave one to a man older than twenty, though, and his jaw starts to ache once he realises that Phil isn't going to be pushed over the edge as quickly as he's used to.

He pulls off to give his jaw a break, stroking Phil and pressing his open mouth along the side of him.

"You think I feel nice?" Dan laughs, pleased by the way the gust of air makes Phil's cock twitch. "Fucking, forgot how good this feels."

"Yeah?" Phil prompts, his voice deep and breathy and so, so nice to listen to. No wonder he's so successful on the radio. "You like sucking cock?"

Dan shivers. "Yeah," he says. He's unashamed, because he feels safe here with Phil. He can admit to liking a cock in his mouth, a hand in his hair, being called pretty. "Yours specifically, though."

Phil laughs. "That's good. I like specifically your cock, too." He looks over at his kitchen for a moment and raises his eyebrows. "I'll get dressed and answer the door when the pizza gets here if you can make me come in the next five minutes."

Well. Never let it be said that Dan Howell backs down from a challenge.

#phanfic #phan #phanfiction #dnp fic #words words words #can't breathe when you touch my sleeve

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minimin1993 · 4 years

Text

S/M 9

Warning: Tom Hiddleston (If that's even a warning)

“Hey Chris I just got off the plane, are you still picking me up?” Min said walking over to the baggage claim waiting for her bag. “Yeah I am parking right now, I will meet you at the gate.” Chris said through the phone.

“Are you sure you want to come get me? You might get mobbed.” Min said quietly in a joking voice.

“Ha-Ha very funny princess. Look whos talking?”

“No one knows I am coming today. Discrete as fuck. Plus I am not in Korea so I ain’t nervous.” Min said proudly grabbing her luggage walking over to the customs. “Well I am about to go through customs right now, I’ll see you outside.”

“Ok, I will be here. Look for the clean shaven tall white boy with a Nasa hat.” Chris joked.

“Psh, I swear you think your stealthy as fuck, thats the most lame ass disguse I ever heard of.” Min said before disconnecting her phone.

After she passed through customs, she practically bouncing with joy ready to see Chris again. When she walked out she started to look for him but saw him nowhere until someone came up behind her hugging her shocking her until she smelled his cologne.

“Chris don’t fucken do that.” She said turning around smacking his chest hearing him laugh before she gasped.

“YOU HAVE A BEARD STILL.” Min said grabbing his face feeling the beard making him laugh.

“Yeah we still training, so I haven’t shaved yet.” Chris said. “Does my princess have a thing for beards?”

“Maybe, but just something about beard on you though, dam. Don’t get me wrong, your absolutely gorgeous without it. BUT when you have it. GOD DAM! My ovaries.” Min said playfully grabbing her abdomen making him laugh.

“Uh huh let’s go. The rest is dying to meet you.” Chris said grabbing her luggage before wrapping his arm over her shoulder walking out to the car.

“What if they won’t like me? What if they find me annoying? Not everyone can stand my annoyingness disorder.” Min said when they got into the car.

“Annoyingness Disorder? Really Princess? There is no such thing. Plus your more like a fireball on steroids” He joked making her nudge him.

“Hey driving here.” Chris said laughing nudging her back making her giggle sticking her tongue out at him.

“I am excited though, I get to meet and work with Scarlett. God that woman is like a Goddess. OH SHIT!!!! AND TOM HIDDLESON… HIS ACCENT GOD DAMM!” Min practically moan in the car making Chris laugh harder.

“Dam orgasming on chair much.” Chris joked.

“Hell yes! That man can give me an orgasm just smiling at me.”

“Uh huh, totally telling him that when we see him.”

“You better not, or I will cut your balls off.” Min said playfully.

“Uh huh. You won’t, you love me too much.” “Nope, our relationship doesn’t hit that point yet.” Min pouts.

“Ouch, and here I thought you loved me.” Chris said grabbing his left chest. “Come on enough joking around we’re almost there.”

“Oooo I am nervous.” She said when she noticed Chris pulling into the movie lot parking in his designated spot.

“Come on they most likely training in the gym.” He said exiting the car with Min walking to the gym. When she entered she was awestruck watching Chris Hemsworth on the weights.

“Shit! That man's biceps.” Min whispered making Chris Evans chuckle.

“I know! Makes mines look like child's play.” He said flexing his arm playfully.

“Psh yours are awesome don’t even start.” She said grabbing it seeing Evans with a proud smirk.

“I knew you loved me.” He said.

“No shit sherlock!” She said

“Did someone call my name?” A voice said from behind her causing her to gasp.

“Holy shit Robert Downey Jr.” Min said turning around staring at RDJ with wide eyes.

“You must me Min we heard so much about from Evans.” RDJ said looking Min up and down causing her to blush.

“I hope those were good things you heard. If not it wasn’t me.” She joked.

“Of course good things.” RDJ winked at her. “Can’t wait to see you in Captain America, from what we heard you’re a pretty quick learner when it comes to gymnastic type moves.”

“Yeah, one of the reasons why I got accepted and debuted with Mystic was because of my flexibility.” She said blushing.

“Well I can’t wait to see it but I think it's time you meet the rest of the crew.” RDJ said wrapping his arm around her shoulders, pulling her toward where the rest was working out as Min turns wide eyed look at Evans seeing him smirk at her with his hands in his pocket walking behind them.

“So everyone the baby of our group has arrived.” RDJ announce to everyone in the gym. “YES! The other female in the bunch. Welcome to the group.” Scarlett said getting off the elliptical walking over to give Min a hug who was speechless looking at her.

“Thanks.” Min whispered

“Oh you are puny.” Hemsworth came over lifting her up in a big hug making her squeak.

“I told you!” Evans said with a smirk on his face.

“I am not!! I am Scarletts height. Maybe.” She said looking at Scarlett height.

“Ok maybe one inch shorter.” Min said pouting.

“It's not in a bad mate. The best things come in fun size.” Hemsworth said

“Ohh don’t start she might make you give her piggyback rides from now on.” Evans said

“Nope, those are special for you and Sebastian.” Min said with a smirk.

“Good.” Evans said with a smile. “Anyways this is Jeremy and Mark. But of course you already know that.”

“Of course I do, I loved you in 28 days later.” Min said giving Jeremy and Mark a hug. “And Mark with some of the classic romantic movies.”

“Thanks, I wish I could say the same about you but I am not familiar with Kpop music.” Mark said regretfully.

“Oh please, no worries, I know Kpop isn’t for everyone, especially this early in the stage.” Min said with a smile.

“Anyways where is Tom, I know Min is dying to meet him.” Evans said looking around the gym not seeing him before Min launch herself.

“I told you not to say anything! Oh I swear I am going to chop you!” Min said hanging on his back making him laugh.

“Nope you love me!” He said holding her walking her around screaming Tom making everyone laugh.

“Tom is in dress rehearsal for fitting.” Hemsworth said.

“Oh thank god.” Min sighed in relief. “Now let me down you big oof”

“Nope! I miss doing this the past few months. You’re giving me a great workout.” Evans said.

“ARE YOU CALLING ME FAT?” Min screamed.

“Oh he did it now.” Scarlett smiled making the group laugh.

“Yeah right!!! You’re barely 110 lb, don’t even start.” He said bouncing her on his back making her squeal holding tighter on his back.

“I am so telling on you to Sebastian and he will Bucky your ass.” Min playfully choked him making him laugh.

“Ok ok. Backing off from the princess.” Chris said letting her down pretending to bow down at her. “But I am going to tell Sebastian your cheating on us with Tom.”

“Pft, like he doesn’t already know.” Min said winking at Chris walking away and completely walked into a hard chest. When she looked up she gulped staring at Tom who was still in his long raven hair wig making her almost moaned.

“Nice to meet you too. You must be Min Hemsworth been texting me about.” Tom said raising his phone causing Min to turn seeing Hemsworth with his phone in his hand caught in the action.

“Hemsworth!! What have you been saying to him?” Min said turning around walking toward him.

“Oh shit! Don’t let her get your phone. Learned that the hard way.” Evans said watching Hemsworth lift his phone up into the air ‘out’ of Mins reach.

“She can’t get it, she's puny.” Hemsworth said again proudly making Min smirk.

“You do remember she got casted as Linda because of her agility right?” RDJ said excitedly.

Min then turns around walking the opposite direction from Hemsworth leaving everyone confused, only to have her turn and stare at him with a mischievous look on his face.

“Oh no I know that look anywhere.” Evans said seeing Min run full speed at Hemsworth using to his shoulder as leverage to lift her over his head swiftly landing in a perfect standing form with his phone in her hands shocking everyone.

“Didn’t see that coming.” Jeremy laughed along with everyone.

“You are so fucked Hemsworth, hope you locked your phone.” Evans said watching Min run away from Hemsworth who was chasing after her.

“How do you run so fast?” Hemsworth asked who can’t seem to catch up to her.

“Might as well give up. You won’t be able to catch her.” Evans said recording the whole ordeal.

“Oh darling, I think you tortured him enough.” Tom said catching Min around the waist as she runs past him making her gasp.

“Shit! You caught her. Sending this to Sebastian.” Evans said.

“Fine, Hemsworth you got lucky Tom here. Next time.” Min said blushing from contact with Tom.

#bucky x reader #james buchanan barnes #sebastian stan #sebastian x reader #winter soldier #winter solider x you #originl character #captain america #infinity war #chris evans #original character #steve rogers #the first avenger #marvel

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queenlifesupport · 5 years

Text

Behind The Scenes (Ben! x Y/N)

@mhoodx “maybe something where ben has a crush on roger taylor’s daughter which is the reader ?”

WORD COUNT : 2,080

I really tried with this one, I’ve been writing so much I’m kind of tiring myself out so I’m very sorry if this lacks “umph”. But I do hope that someone enjoys this! Thank you for reading! Oh and I went through and edited it, I sadly might've missed a few, fair warning

WARNINGS : Language and horrible writing :)

"Dad please just let me get to work." I shook my head slightly while laughing over the phone, this was a normal occurrence between us.

"Okay, okay, I'm glad you're doing this though Y/N. I'm really proud of you."

"Yeah, okay. I'll call you later?" He hummed in reply, then we both said our goodbyes. My dad was a little, what's the word, obsessed with me. But at least I knew he cared, he's definitely the best father I could ask for. I took in a nervous breath, taking a look in the mirror making sure I looked somewhat professional. I left the counter I stood in front of, making my way over to the production team, patiently waiting for what tasks I needed to finish.

"Y/N, they should be coming any minute, could you make sure all the dressings rooms are prepped along with the hair and makeup booth?" Someone in the group gave me the directions, I replied with a yes and then went off to do my duty. I enjoyed working here, a lot, I loved the studio, I loved the behind the scenes aspect, everything was so exciting to me although I had only started not long ago, and I needed something captivating. I quickly checked in all four rooms, closing the doors behind me and taking a look on my clipboard to make sure the outfit matched with the names written on the door. All seemed just fine. There was a sound of energetic attitudes in the main room, lasting for a few minutes while I stood by the marked off areas. Soon the chatter seemed to move down the hallway, only now revealing the source, the 4 main guys of the current Bohemian Rhapsody film. I’ve heard my father chat about them quite a lot so it felt as if this wasn’t my first time meeting all of them.

"Welcome! Each of your rooms has a name board on it, make yourself at home. I will be in shortly once everyone gets situated." I said with a bright smile while looking at each one of them. I knew everyone's name I just didn't have a face to put it to, but I did know 'Ben Hardy' would be playing my father. They all thanked me and entered the correct room while I stood outside distracting myself for 5 minutes. I knocked softly on the first door, Rami Malek, playing as the one and only Freddie Mercury. I heard a light come in, signaling me to open the door. "Good morning, Mr. Malek." I said as I shut the door.

"Good morning, Miss?" He waited to receive my last name.

"Taylor." I replied, setting down my clipboard on the red velvet couch cushion.

"Ah, Rogers daughter, got it - so what do we have today?" I walked him through the outfit, also helping him with some pieces he struggled with. At the end, he looked like Mercury's part in Break Free, but without the classic wig and makeup. "Perfect." He laughed while clapping his hands together at his reflection.

"I'll leave you alone, you can come and find me if something is wrong." And with that I left the room. I got myself prepared for the next room while scribbling down notes and marking off things on my to do list. To my favor, Ben Hardy was next in line, I was excited to finally meet the man who was playing as my dad. I gave the door a knock like the one before and anticipated an acknowledgement at the sound, the door opened while Ben stood there slightly confused. "Hardy?" I snickered lightly at his expression.

"I recognized you when I came in, do I know you from somewhere? I could never forget a face that beautiful" He inquired, looking me up and down,

"You probably do." I chuckled once again, entering the room. "You know my dad very well, in fact, you're playing him." A look of realization echoed on his face. I have to say, he's pretty attractive, but that's probably not the best thing to say about the guy who's acting as your father.

"I haven't seen you around much, and I'm quite surprised, I thought you'd be joining your father for some shoots." He made his way over to the lit up vanity, picking up a few stray pieces of paper, flipping through them.

"I've been away to Ohio, graduating from one of the many beauty schools in America. It's actually supposed to be the best there. I've been working here for about three weeks now" I said slightly softer than my sentence before, following after him to the mirror. He looked up at me through the cheval glass, catching my eyes. He had beautiful eyes, a gaze that made you desire to be unraveled in his mind, even a blink made your heart flutter.

"I assume thats why you're in the studio then? Finally able to work here?" He smiled softly, taking the side of his lip between his teeth.

"You got it right. Enough talking though - lets discuss the outfit and components." I conveyed as I escorted myself to the opposite end of the dressing room. Gently placing the materials over my arm, then shuffling back over to Ben. "The tights are easy, roll the whole leg down to where you'd put your foot in." I demonstrated the process by showing him how to roll them.

"Mhm..." He hummed, I looked over at him about to say another sentence but realized he was gawking at me.

"Are you even paying attention to anything I'm saying?" I let out a breathy laugh, more annoyed than amused. He yet again smiled while looking down, then shook his head as an answer. I went over the instructions again, forcing him to pay attention this time, once he understood everything I walked to the corner to direct my attention on the wall so he could change into the costume. After a few minutes he gave me approval for turning back around. The white button up was not buttoned up at all, along with not tucked into the black mini flare skirt, the rest seemed fine. I made my way over to him, so I could assist. "Can't you button your own shirt?" I asked, slightly frustrated while folding his collar.

"I mean - I can, but with a pretty thing like you, I'd rather you get it for me." He sure was flirty, and he had what seemed to be no shame. I attempted to roll my eyes with a mean look plastered on my face but failed, ending up still rolling my eyes but with a grin. "I saw that smile." He said with an achieved look playing upon his face. I started buttoning the shirt up, feeling his gaze directly on my face, I was too nervous to look up for I knew we'd lock eyes again.

"Tuck it in." I adjusted the tie and laid it down nicely, then taking a step back to give him space.

"I don't know how to." He said with a fake frown.

"Bye, Ben." I breathed out in my best 'sweet' voice, I didn’t want to deal with him acting stupid in order for me to help him.

"Bye, love." He marveled before tucking the shirt in.

I had helped all 4 men with their 'drag-ish’ costumes, now working as one of the two makeup artists, not having to do this all on my own, luckily. I set up my iPad on the white plastic makeup counter, I used the piece of equipment for notes, references, and scheduling, which helped me due to needing to pull up reference photos for each look. I felt my phone buzz in the pocket of my black apron, notifying me my father just got here, earlier he told me him and Brian would be coming to the studio to help direct some of the scenes and he would text me when he arrived. Soon natural light flooded the room, causing everyone to look over, the two of them entered, stopping to chat some with others. I went about my business, getting all my colors and brushes I needed all set out in an organized fashion. The only thing on the agenda was Joe and Rami, just as looking over the plan I directed my attention to the dressing room hall, watching all four members of the makeshift 'band' walk over to the two booths. I excused myself for a quick second, approaching my father and my non-blood related uncle, embracing both of them with a hug.

"I see you still haven't cut your hair!" I exclaimed to Brian, using my hand to scrunch it ever so lightly.

"I see you still can't shut up about my hair!" He beamed back, earning a laugh from all three of us.

"Well, if you follow me you two can help with the looks or just venture around the set." I reported, then listening to them debate on what to do, they decided to take a look around the studio. I happily walked back to my booth, inviting Joe to sit down in the black spiny chair. "You ready?" I asked him through our reflections.

"Ready as I'll ever be."

After an hour and a half of makeup + a wig, his look was complete, I was pretty proud of myself for I matched him completely to John Deacons original look. He admired himself in awe, then thanked me and walked off to go chat with Roger and Brian. I turned around to grab the disinfecting container for the brushes so I could soak all the used materials. I turned around to call out for Rami so we could get right onto it but I was quickly stopped.

"Ben, get out of the chair, you're with Mescelia." I rolled my eyes while crossing my arms. Both his hands held onto his phone while he focused his gaze down. "Hello? Hardy?" I waved my hand in front of the screen.

"No, you have me." He said lazily without looking up from his phone.

"Oh really? Let's see here." I sassily grabbed the iPad, going to my agenda, placing the technology in front of his face. His eyes slowly scanned it.

"Yeah, right there, Ben Hardy with attachment images." He looked up at me while reciting what was 'said' on the screen. I quickly flipped it over, letting myself see on my own.

"I swear it said Rami not even 2 hours ago."

"I guess someone changed it." He shrugged. It was him, that little fucker. I huffed, this guy was a real pain in my ass. I grabbed the wig from the other station, taking my time to put it on him where it would stay. Every time I looked at his reflection to see what I needed to adjust I always saw him looking at me through the mirror too. Once the wig was secured I added some light foundation for he didn’t need much, using a beauty blender to smooth out the application. I knew making this absolutely perfect would take some time.

Another 2 hours passed, leading me to the final finish, lipstick.

“I have to say, you make a beautiful woman.” I whispered slightly so only he heard me as I concentrated on shaping his lips.

“You’re a beautiful woman. Maybe let this beautiful woman take you out on a date? Beautiful woman to beautiful woman.” He said while barely moving his lips, I looked at him as he looked from my lips to my eyes.

“What happens if I say yes?” I questioned with a sly smirk. What was I even thinking, this guy was frustrating the hell out of me earlier.

“I’ll show you my tits.” He joked, letting out a small laugh.

“You aren’t afraid of what my dad would think?”

“Well are you?”

“I’m afraid for you.” I winked at him after taking the lipstick applicator off his lips.

“So is that a yes?” He asked after rubbing his now pink lips together.

“Let’s see how you do today and then I’ll answer the question.” I gave him a small smile as he stood up, using the arm chairs as support.

“I know it will be a yes.” He called out while strutting away. I rolled my eyes at his annoyingness, yet he was adorable at the same time, especially as a woman.

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flamebrain · 5 years

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mattfoggy hcs, straight from the bastard empire sorry these all read like shitepostes(L O N G post under cut you’ve been warned)

WTNV au:

nightvale is just populated by like. vigilantes and other poewered people and foggy shoes up one day like. hey anyone need a lawyer? and the whole town falls in love w him

MURDERDOCK IS KEVIN

matt does radio and talks about foggys perfect hair and perfect teeth and foggy calls in like "heh, thanks dude, but aren't you like blind?" and matt shuts the call off immediatley

everybody knows matt is daredevil because he makes wink wink nudge nudge comments about it like 'ah. it appears that an entity has appeared near the dog park. castle appears to be on the scene now, and...ok, he's got a gun. i cant do anything about that, but my pal (noises of him scrambling and obviously knocking things over) daredevil might be able OKHERESTHEWEATHER" and it cuts off and like. he shows up 5 seconds later to kick frank in the face for using lethal measures AGAIN

EVERY TIME IT CUTS TO THE WEATHER AND THEN CUS BACK AND THE PROBLEM HAS BEEN SOLVED ITS JUST MATT. like. breathing just a little heavier than normal into the mic like. 'so it appears uh. the issue has been resolved thanks again to daredevil and his pal moon knight. such a shame i had to cower under my desk while the weather was on. ok goodnight'

the funky thing abt nightvale in this au is that it's basically just like. new york from 616 but foggy's like. from our earth so he's like HWAT THE FUCK AND AHIT IS GOING ON IN HERE ON THIS DAY AND WHY CANT I LEAVE he gets kidnapped by super villains on like his second day in town and immediatley regrets every life choice he's ever made

matt works at nightvale radio by day and conviently cuts to the weather every time something comes up so sometimes there's like. 7 half hour weather broadcasts a day and the townspeople just. humor him

foggy falls in love with matt after figuring out after .5 seconds that he's daredevil and he saved him from a bunch of baddies on like his second day and matt compliments him on the radio like every day and yeah they're fuckin good ok assorted stupid college hcs: matt and foggy like to chill in each other's beds. foggy doesn't notice that often because matt moves back b4 he gets back and matt pretends not to notice but like. he can smell foggy was there. foggy. stop napping in this bed you're making my sheets smell like you, foggy, i KNOW they're silk and i know you think you're getting away with it but you're NOT,

matt, coming back into the dorm after being out for the day: foggy are you laying on my bed foggy, sitting up straight: nah pal. just sitting on the end for a minute hehe. just had to rest the old joints matt, knowing DAMN well that he was lying down a second ago and he's obviously lying but not being able to say anything; haha ok. move

hrnnn matt knows foggy is gay long before he tells him because he catches him in a lie about who he was out with but he can't say anything and like. he knows foggy is scared to tell him but he doesn't know how to bring it up and he's like. i want him to know he can trust me but i don't know how to tell him i know please foggy

foggys heart goes a mile a minute anytime the subject of being gay comes up around matt and matt wants to yell at him that it's OK and he doesn't care but his hints that he's fine with it seem to fly right over foggys head and so one day he gets so fed up with trying to convince foggy he's chill with gay people he just kisses him. wig

hrnnn. matt doesn't like the snow because it messes with his senses and he can't see but he can't say that to foggy so he just says he doesn't like the cold and foggys like "yeah doofus you weigh like three pounds you're skin and bone compared to me smh" and insists on cuddling him every time he sees matt get like That bc he thinks he's just chilly and it's. oddly comforting to matt because yeah. nobody really Holds him like that, and he Is Cold, and foggy is Warm,

matt gets Very touchey around people he's close with and so when he gets close with foggy he puts his arm around him a lot, rests his head on his shoulder, holds his arm even when they're not going anywhere, etc. foggys heart speeds up every time but matt just assumes that's what people hearts do when that happens because he doesn't really do that with anyone else and hey, he's happy when he does it and his heart maybe spikes a little too, but then he gets someone else's arm to lead him when foggys sick one week and their heart stays the exact same, what's up with that? so then he starts paying attention to all the people on campus, and the touching doesn't usually make the hearts go wild, but, well. matt 'sees' it happens and he's like HaHa, See, This is A Thing, and then he realizes that the people that have it happen to them? they're couples. and he just. freezes because first of all, Foggy- and at him- an- and second, his heart ALSO does a thing, so-

heres a rEALLY stupid unrelated au/hc i got after hearing a friends disater story hfdjhskja matt goes on a blind (hehe) date with a girl and it's pretty much a disaster, it turns out she brought her friend who is also meeting a guy at the same place, and like. she's obviously incredibly wack she says blind people are god's mistake and stupid shit like that so matt gets up halfway through their meal to go sit in the bathroom for 20 minutes while he thinks of an excuse to leave? and eventually a guy comes in and he's like 'uh hey, dude, you in here? your date grabbed her friend and left so we're both dateless now, thats a relief for me and unless you're just having incredibly bad bowel movements i think it's pobably one for you since you Have been in here for like half an hour uh im foggy by the way' and then they go back out and sit together and talk about how wack that fuckin was and like. inadvertent date

hey i can talk a lot of shit about how matt falls asleep on foggy but. sometimes foggy falls asleep on or next to or with matt and matt goes !!!! and he does not move and then he eventually falls asleep with foggy head on his shoulder and his head on foggys and when FOGGY wakes up and realizes matts still there and is ALSO asleep he doesn't move and eventually falls back asleep and then it's just like. waiting until the time aligns that they're both awake at the same time because neither wants to move and wake the other send tweet

SOULMATE AU:

foggy looks up from his college bed, sees matt, and suddenly EVERYTHING is fucking rainbow and he's like 'oh fuck. oh shit. wait. this is a dude' and matt's like 'is everything ok my guy?' because foggy's like. >:O and of course he has no idea because he's blind but foggy doesnt realise this and for a hot minute he;s like "OH FUCK. ITS ONE OF THOSE RARE OCASIONS WHERE HES PERFECT FOR ME BUT I'M NOT FOR HIM," and is about to s o b before he's like wait a fucking minute

yknow the au where like. the first words you hear from your soulmate are marked on your skin at birth? foggy's are 'excuse me', absolutley common, a chance meeting, and he stops jumping every single time he hears them after age 8 when he realises just how many times that phrase is said. matt's are 'yeah, who're you looking for,' but he doesnt remember that, there's no constant reminder of it since he's blind, the nuns wouldn't tell him, the kids made up childish shit like 'poopoo', and stick DEFINITLEY wouldnt fucking tell him because hes stick and hes an asshead and eventually matt stops asking and caring. it takes WEEKS for after they meet for foggy to ask matt about his words and matt just says 'oh yeah, i dont remember. here" and shows foggy and when he sees them he's like. 'hm. sounds familiar' and forgets about it untill like two years later theyre drunk and talking about the first time they met and matt's like 'yeah you asked like 'who'm i looking for and then panicked because i was blind' and foggy's brain just like. short circuits for a whole ass minute and then when it clicks he just goes. "yOU"

TRANS MATT:

matt realises when he's still in the orphanage that mayhaps he hates being not a dude and haha! hes not gonna fucking come out to catholics he knows about That. he tries to tell stick, around the time their closest, and FUCK STICK he refuses to call him anything else or support him becaise stick is a peace of fuck shit FUCK STICK so that scars matt from coming out for a DAMN while so like. when he goes to college he introduces himself to everyone as matt and emails his proffesors like. 'hello please my name is redacted on your forms please call me matt its uh. a nickname' and he's not like. out to anyone but matt is close enought to his deadname that most people don't question it. foggy does, though, a little while after they meet, and matt is so fed up with not telling people and being called the wrong pronouns he just goes 'i want to be a guy ok' and goes absolutley APESHIT when foggy's like 'oh, cool. do you want me to use he pronouns for you' because wait. people are...ok sometimes? and matt's like. about to cry

alternatley: matt says "I don't wanna be a girl." and foggy goes "oh hey are you trans? same hat!" and then foggy tells matt like. binding tips and shit and theyre Good ok

deadpool kills transphobes, sm n dd just fucking beat the SHIT out of them in a back alley and like. they let DP know where they are but whatever happens happens :D

elektra, impaling two transphobes onto the side of a building with her knives: matthew, i know you can hear me, why

one day elektra sees matt has dumped a guy on her roof and just. sighs and goes back inside and matt waits for like 15 minutes before halfheartedly picking up the dude and dropping him off at franks.

matt dropped them off at nats One Time and she went apeshit and hunted down like 20 more of them.

foggy, holding a bat: cmon matt let me kill ONE matt: 'fine but if you get caught im not going to be your lawyer.'

INTO THE DEVILVERSE AU:

earth 14512/TRN700 (peni parker’s universe) matt murdock has a robot seeing eye dog who's also a vigilante

hddjdsjdhdn they all show up to earth 6's foggy and he just. sighs and all the devils start crying because He Is Here

hmm ok. canonically we know nothing about miles's matt but we know he exists and is known figure because miles knows of him but doesn't know he's daredevil i'm Prefty Sure so like. i'm gonna say he's just a successful lawyer who has radarsense but never got yoinked away from the orphanage by stick and never got training so like. hemndhdjsjnow the QUESTION is who finds that matt because there's a Very Different outcome depending on if like. murderdock meets him first or the matt from hobopeters universe does

hmm. murderdock comes in first like gwen does but doesn't out himself as competent w like swords and shit. but he OH HES THE OPPOSING FORCE FOR UH A COURT CASE MATT IS IN AND MATT HAS NO IFEA HOW SIMILAR THEY LOOK BECAUSE HES BLIND HRNNNNNHSHDHDHDJ and then matt from HP's universe comes in like HEY YOURE ME RIGHT. what the FUCK i need the laws in this dimension STAT and murderdock ':"sees" him and is like ah fuck. my goose may be uhhh cooked

ok mileses matt is like 'so what brought y'all here??? hhh???? and murderdock sighs and goes well my boss who's not really my boss from MY universe is doing something stupid here and opened a dimensional portal and it could maybe tear the multiverse apart which i guess i'm not stoked about' and matt's like 'who's your boss?' and murderdock begrudgingly says 'wilson fisk' and matt immediatley goes >:O because he's CONSTANTLY defending people who were injured as a result of what fisk and his company do

anyways. matt immediatley rushes to foggys because "foggys my partner, he's helped me deal with fisk, he knows him, he can help," and he swings open the door and like. one of two things happens actually either A: foggy is like matt. MAATT. AHAT IS GOING ON WH. WHY IS THERE A TALKING DEER WEARNING SPANDEX WHO CLIMBED THROIGH MY WINDOW MATT PLEASE HE SAYS HES Y O U or like. matt walks in and deerdevil is playing pattycake with robodog and daredevil noir is incessantly flirting with foggy and when matt comes in foggys like 'hey. i don't know what's going on but i think i'm trading my best friend'

murderdock is like...the cool college student who tells freshies about weed murderdock: so, you don't know how to fight right matt: no??? i'm blind??? md: but you can kinda see right. matt: yeah like a radar kinda md: normal blind people can't do that you know matt: they wHAT md: you can listen to heartbeats if you try hard enough. you can tell when people are lying matt: i can W H A T md: yeah. what me to teach you how to kill a man matt: W H AT NO IM A L A W Y E R WH

hrnnn the matts in this universe push our matt away to stay with foggy because he doesn't deserve 2 die and you KNOW every matt pushes people away but foggy is like. matt i know you tried it's ok i lov you buddy and he's like HRGGHHHH FUNCK YOU and makes foggy tell him stories untill he can distinguish lies and hide in a place around their office untill matt can like. find him instantly and training montage shit you feel me and he rolls up to the collider in his black pjs like "hello my fellow devil men. i hear you all have no plan. well. i don't either but i'm here" and one matt is like. how did you go-OH YOU DID IT and all the mats high five and cry a littlethey're still reluctant to let matt come help but they're all like. "we're all depressed and suicidal anyways we all have big guilt and if we didn't let him i lnOW he's gonna have big guilt forever he can stay"

THE PENUMBRA PODCAST AU:

foggy is a private eye, kinda depressed a lil bit, and he works w his secretary karen who helps him with tech and stuff because he is god awful at all that

"mike whatevermaggiesmaidennameis" is an occult specialist from dark matters agency assigned by an agent natasha of dark matters to help him with his current case.

foggy does NOT want to do this with any damn occultist or whatever the hell but before he can escape mike shows up and god DAMN is he charming and catches him before he can climb out the window, so. that's that for introductions. anyways, hijinks, elektra is cassandra, if you care listen to the murderous mask, anyhoo foggy stars to notice something is kinda weird about matt but brushes it off. they finish investigating and retrieve an important artifact.

it's cold, mike says. sorry dude, all the places near here are closed, foggy says. is your place? mike asks. oh, says foggy they go back to foggys place and maybe make out a little bit, but foggy realizes oh shit, mike just tried to steal the keys to my safe where i stored the artifact, shit, and plaxces him under arrest before he can do anything, and calls the cop cops.

they come to take mike away, and minutes later foggy finds a note, scrawled INCREDIVLY messily, in his pocket. "sorry," it says, "i wasn't tricking you about anything i said, and i meant everything i did. -matt murdock ps. check around, say, X avenue. you may have to do a bit of cleanup." when foggy checks cameras that overview there, he find the officers that took murdock from his apartment hogtied together, and sees their clothes strewn on the ground - forming letters - with love. their car is gone. PODCAST AU:

matt listens to podcasts a lot right and so foggy is like hmm mayhaps this is a good idea. but the type of podcasts they listen to differs so incredibly like matt listens to serial and the wildest one he listens to is probably judge john hodgman whereas foggy listens to shitpost podcasts like mbmbam and can i pet your dog foggy keeps referencing mbmbam around matt because he just assumes that he listens to it and matt is so confused every time and one day foggy says "damn matt you're really horny for this one huh" and matt just snaps and says FOGGY WHAT DO YOU M E AN

so then they are like oh shit you're not listening to the good ones. no YOURE not listening to the good ones. solution? listen together which means sharing earbuds which means sitting next to eachother on small college bed which means????? cuddling

also eventually they decide fuck it. let's make our own podcast and they combine the mbmbam and jjh format so they get questions and do goofs and stuff and then give actual legal advice but sometimes foggy will be like "ok. here's what you do. you need a cat? go into the pet shelter and take one. what are the gonna do beat you up with their cat toys? didn't think so." and matt starts crying because "Fo g g y WE ARE LAWYERS I KNOW YOURE GOOFING BUT THATS ILLEGAL FOGGY YOI CANT TELL OUR LISTENERS TO GO DO CRIME"

COFFE SHOP AU:

matt has a caffeine addiction and constantly comes to foggys coffee shop and orders one black coffee every morning and foggy eventually is like. hey buddy. do you EVER drink ANYTHING F U N EVER

matts like...no...i need coffee as strong and dark as my soul... and foggys like ok edglelord. wait up i'm about to change your life

foggy makes him a latte that's just a little bit caramelly but not too sweet and he's like here. drink this. no charge you deserve to live a little. also here's your boring edgy coffee you still have to pay me for that one. matt tries it and he's like hmm. not bad, but just not. Good and foggy is like wow fuck you. i'm going to find a good drink for you that isn't this hell water so every morning matt comes in and foggy gives him a black coffee and a free Fun and Cool coffee on the house

matt always is polite even when foggy can tell he DESPISES what foggy made but he's not going to stop untill he finds something god damn it matt

ok anyways they start meeting up more. matt starts taking his breaks in the coffee shop and and foggy hmmm...always seems to have a shift off when matt comes down..hmm. coincidence....hmmm....theo suffers for him by covering all his shifts when matt comes in and he's like well, actually fuck work

eventually foggy is like hey dude. do you wanna test my drinks before they go on the menu or help me perfect my recipes and shit you have a good toungie right (matt goes apeshit, because fuckin FOGGY YOU CABT SAY THAT) but he's like haha yeah. that'd be fun. haha

and then foggy finds out matt is INCREDIBLE at baking when he hands him a cookie and matt goes. hmm. too much flour add a fourth a cup less and a pinch more of saltand he's like??? bitch. i'd like to see you do better. and then matt does

so basically every day foggy closes up a little earlier and lets matt in and they dick around in the kitchen and bake and make coffee and foggys shop gets more and more popular because hey this already really good joint just started selling the most BALLER carrot cAke waht the fucké

anyways fall comes around and foggy is like GUES WHATT ITS TIME FOR WHITE GIRL DRINKS TRY THIS and he gives matt a pumpkin spice latte and matt is like. •.• THIS IS IT. THATS THE ONE

and foggy starts crying MATT PLEASE YOU HAVE TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. PKEASE MATT, MATT I CANT ADD PSL YEARROUND BECAUSS YOURE A BASIC WHITE BITCH MATT

he bullies foggy into keeping the latte on the menu by threatening to stop helping him bake and foggy is SO OFFENDED, on behalf of good taste everywhere, matt, please,

anyways foggy continues rags on matt for only liking the shittiest fucking drink god damn it matthew fucking hell i make you 3 billion and THIS is the one you pick you disaster and matt is like haha shut up. stoopid

foggy doesn't, and you can guess where this be headed because i'm gay and soft,

matt kisses him and foggys like. ?????????? and matt goes AH FUCK. I COULDNT THINK OF A BETTER WAY TO GET YOU TO SHUT YOUR MOUTH SORRY. GUESS ILL GO and foggy throws cookie dough at him and drags him back over because he's not leaving fuck that. fuck you. and then they're happy and domestic the end

wait i lied matt opens a pro-bono firm in the back of foggy's shop and he gives all his clients freshly baked dessert and coffee and he's so good at being a lawyer and foggy becomes so good @ running his shop that customers keep coming and they're the Cute Gay Couple everyone knows abt and loves

ACCIDENTAL (?) KISSING:

SO. there are so many god damn moments foggy nearly fucking breaks and smooches matt out of sheer unbridled uwu soft feelings. SO MANY. when they win their first mock trial together and matt looks so FUCKING happy and he tells foggy how good they work as a team and foggy is about to lose his mind but he just goes. 'haha yeah' and gives matt a fist bump they finish taking the bar: matt's had to take it in a seperate room, stupid blind accommodations. he finishes first because OF COURSE HE DOES HE'S MATT MURDOCK and the second foggy finishes and leaves the room he sees matt there and he's filled with so many emotions he's about to go apeshit but he manages to contain them JUST enough not to make out with matt on the spot but gives him the tightest fucking hug and matt's like "ok buddy! love you too! please dont break my ribs!" and foggys too happy to notice matt forgot to flinch like he didnt know foggy was coming

Foggy gets the sign to matt and he can tell how fuckin stoked matt is and all he can think about is how grateful he is that the two of them get to work together and fucking do GOOD together and he's trying to express that in his awkward foggy way and he's GOING to kiss him right then and there!! hes about to do it look out world!!! and then matt says "you're NOT going to kiss me" and foggy realises haha YEAH THATD BE A BAD IDEA HUH and jokes it off and gives matt another hug - "i'll be careful not to break the ribs this time, buddy, seems like you've been falling over and hurting yourself enough recently,"-

foggy almost kisses matt out of anger when he finds out he's daredevil, when he won't shut up about how this city needs him and foggy would have done the same and blah, blah, bullshit because maybe then he'd FUCKING listen to him, or at least it'd shut him up, but the honest betrayal he feels - at matt for not telling him and at himself for STILL having a part of him that wants to kiss matt - is enough to get him just to leave : ^)

alright. the gang is watching fisk get carted away and see that SHIT, he's broken out, of course it wasnt going to be this easy. matt puts karen in a taxi goes to run off and foggy grabs him by his coat because MATT. you're not going to go fight fisk in your god damn pajamas right now it's too dangerous you're going to die you stupid son of a bitch idiot

and of course matt doesn't listen, he tells foggy to get back into the car with karen, go to his place, they'll be safe there, and grabs his own taxi

and foggy's left to sit there with karen in the cab as it drives Oh Too Fucking Slowly to matt's, and he's mumbling curses all the way and karen is trying to calm him down, he doesnt know why he's so worried, and all foggy can think about is what if matt dies because i didnt stop him and what if karen never gets to hear it from him and about 10 billion what-ifs that wont leave him the FUCK alone, and he sits next to the windowsill he knows matt comes in through and waits, not even wanting to look at the tv because what if he sees worse news Hrgh

matt beats up fisk and he barely even waits for the cops to get there, he gets one look and confirms 'yup, that's mahoney,' and fucking BOOKS it to his apartment, he climbs through the window and foggy's just sitting there waiting, karens in the next room watching the broadcast at a 3 minute delay on her phone, matt doesnt have a tv hes BLIND >:,\

and when matt comes in, bloody and beaten up and doing That Panting Thing He Does, but definitley alive, foggy just fucking. grabs him by the shoulders and kisses him because HE IS A L I V E !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and matt is suprised but he doesnt even try to protest because he's still riding the adrenaline from the fight

anyways. foggy pulls away for air and says 'you're so fucking stupid and i hate you' and then matt kisses hIM because uhh, thats FOGGY

and it's a minute later that matt senses another heartbeat and realizes karen's standing in the doorway, and she raises an eyebrow and obviously trying not to panic asks 'uh, foggy, pray tell, buddy, why you're making out with the devil in matt's bedroom' and foggy goes apeshit and tries to think of an excuse that doesn't invole 'uh thats matt' but it just kinda comes out as some stupid shit like 'i,,, uh,,,,, secret,...affair,,?i',m....gay." and matt just sighs and pulls off his helmet like "hey karen. it's me. hey karen whats poppin its me blind matt murdock" and needless to say they all have a Lot to talk abt

DRUNK KISSING:

so like. the first year they're together matt and foggy go out a lot, and it's mostly foggy dragging matt places and matt reluctantly coming because A) if someone doesnt watch foggy this idiot is going to puke and pass out in a ditch and B) he really like his company shh. no telling because that gay

anyways matt usually only drinks a little but foggy is mad lightweight right. he doesn't get shitfaced too often, usually only after exams or when he knows he has no classes the next day. when he does get shitfaced though he absolutley loses his shit and becomes even more touchy than usual, which is VERY TOUCHY because fuck you its my au and i get to choose the default affection levels

so basically. once foggy starts hugging matt and leaning on him and whining into his shirt about the 'hot girls' and 'killer nachos' at the party matt knows it's time to head home and foggy is too busy wrapping his arms around matt to notice he's being dragged out untill its too late

and y'know, thats fine, that's usual, all normal friend stuff, except what foggy also has a tendancy to do when he's drunk is kiss matt. sometimes its on his cheeks, or his forehead, or his shirt?? matt doesnt get that one??? and sometimes foggy even tries to go for the lips when hes particularly wilde. matt knows to expect this by the third time they go out, but it's still always a suprise when it happens, because sometimes it'll be out of nowhere when theyre walking back, or foggy'll stop matt and grab his cheeks and kiss him? sometimes they'll get all the way back to the dorm and matt will make foggy lie down and foggy will grab his shirt and pull him close enough to give him a quick peck before rolling over and promptly beggining to snore

which, y'know, is absolutley great for a maybe-gay-for-his-best-friend-catholic. what's also great is that foggy never seems to remember the fact he kissed matt the night before, and if he does, he definitley does NOT bring it up

so that's fine. whatever. thats life and matt will pretend like he doesnt care when foggy gives him a smooch because hes straight and loves girls and jesus christ, no homo, amen

but THEN. . then matt and foggy have been studying for exams for weEKS and theyre FINALLY DONE, FINALLY, and they are both going to get wasted out of their mINDS you better BELIEVE IT

so they do! and eventually they stumble back to their dorm together and sit together on the floor with a half-downed bottle of tequila and matt decides fuck it. he tells foggy he's never kissed a guy and foggy is like "haha cool. i have." matt's like "haha was it good" and foggys like "hell yeah man better than girls" so matts like hmm. "foggy i think i want to kiss a guy" and you can guess where this is goin

foggy is an oblivious little shit and just thinks matt's having a gay awakening so he's like "oh cool" and matt starts vibrating at inhuman frequency because FOGGY THIS IS THE ONE TIME I"M BASICALLY ASKING YOU TO DRUNK KISS ME AND YOU D O N T" so he just goes "haha yeah." and foggy's like "haha yeah"

and then matt chugs the bottle of tequila and says "foggy i think i wanna kiss you" and then he does but he's a good christian and also stupid so he just like. goes mwah on foggy's cheek

and foggy stares at him for like 15 seconds before basiclly challenging him to 'kiss him like a man, murdock, how are you supposed to get the gay experience if you dont go all in' and then they make out for like 20 minutes and life is good

(they both wake up w the worst fucking hangovers and theyre passed out on the floor and matt's like "foggy....im gay..." and foggys like "haha do you remember i kissed you" and matts like "????foggy i kissed YOU" and foggys like "oh yeah you did. you should have done that earlier" and matts says "????you were too busy trying to kiss me" and foggy goes "oh haha i was. cool" and then they fall back asleep...then they.....boyfriend.s)

FLOWER SHOP/TATTOO ARTIST AU:

so. matt is a florist and he runs a little shop across the street from an empty piece of real estate. a tiny place that used to be a deli but had just the WORST sandwiches, it was no wonder they closed down, god damn. anways. matt runs his shop with his best friends kirsten and karen who have IMPECCABLE taste in flowers and less impeccable taste in impulse control and not being huge lesbians.

one day this dude pulls up into matt's shop. his request is maybe the strangest matt's ever heard - 'can you get me two bouquets of like, the most metal flowers you have? like, ones that just look super cool but also, yknow, smell super good and sick and shit?'

matt laughs, and tells the guy that yeah, he can't help with the looks part, but he'll make sure to get him some that smell 'quote' sick and shit, come back tomorrow morning and they'll have some ideas-hey, what are these for anyways?

and the guy tells him, oh, hah, i'm moving in across the street, opening a little tattoo place? wanted some flowers to make it seem more, uhh....welcoming. matt laughs and says yeah, sure, cool, and tells him if he has anymore questions to call the store and ask for matt. the guy tells him if he ever wants a tattoo just cross the street and ask for foggy and unless the flowers matt gives him really suck he won't do him dirty and tattoo a dick on him

so anyways, they have a couple meetings, foggy decides on the flowers he wants and thanks matt and tells him hey, he should come check out the shop, it's opening tomorrow, and foggy wants to be able to point to the guy who did the sick florals. matt doesnt have anything better to do and he likes the sound of this guy's voice so hell, he might as well

when he goes over matt realizes oh shit. he really is out of his element here, but he asks the guy at the counter for 'foggy' and is led over to a corner where foggy's sitting and tattooing...himself? and matt realizes hey. i kind of have no idea what this dude looks like

so he sorta. sits there awkwardly untill he asks like. 'uh. i cant actually see what youre doing' and foggy goes OH IM SO FUCKING STUPID. i'm. man, saying this out loud seems kinda really stupid and cheesy i cant believe i have to do this...i'm....it's one of the flowers in the bouquet you made me....i just thought it looked really neat and smelled good and it....kinda reminds me of you and OK i KNOW that sounds really weird we met like 4 days ago BUT you seem super cool and i kinda hope we can maybe like. be friends or hang out or something,

and matt's like. o//////o yeah okay. uh. thats cool. thats cool uh im sure the flower is really pretty haha i love that type haha UH DO YOU WANT TO GET LUNCH OR SOMETHING haha maybe ill get a flower tattoo one day its pretty cool that you do tattoos UH IM FREE TOMOROW WAIT MAYBE THATS TOO SOON IM SORRY UH IM FREE WEDNESDAYS,

and foggy just kinda laughs and says 'no, tomorrow works,' and hey! they make plans and get coffee together and matt's like so. what tattoos do you have and foggy starts listing a bunch and eventually matt's like :( i wish i could see them they sound beautiful and foggy's like. here. heres my arm can i. yeah ok. and he grabs matts ar,m and he's like ok. feel the skin, its still a little raised can you feel that? ok, run your fingers over here and i can like. tell you wjats there

cue like an hour of sensual arm touching and tattoo explaining and the more matt learns about foggy and his tattoos and the more he hears the way he talks the more he's like A) oh fuck, i kinda really like this guy whos letting me feel up his arms and B) do i want a tattoo? i kind of want a tattoo

anyways. time jump they hang out a bit more, foggy always comes into matt's shop and talks to him in between customers, shows him the patterns he's designing, etc, and one day he comes in with a paper that has a design of some flowers on it and shows it to matt and as he's running his fingers across it he stops and says 'foggy? will you do this to me'

and foggys like 'bud are you sure? first tattoo, right, do you-are you really sure you want to do this, like, when, and wh" and matt's like 'shut up and put this ink in my skin before i chicken out' so matt sits through a PAINFUL ASS TATTOO and when it's done he's like FOGGY CAN I TOUCH IT CAN I TOUCH IT FOGGY CAN I TOUCH IT and foggy has to physically restrain matt from fondling his tattoo because its FRESH MATT

so foggys like 'ok, this is cause for celebration! babys first ink! we;re getting beers cmon' and they both go out to drink and matt's like 'hey foggy...can i touch more of your tattoos' and foggy's like 'uh, sure, i have another armfull,' and they do that for a while untill matt gets to the one foggy did the first time he visited foggy's tattoo parlor and foggy's like hah. remember this one? and matt's like yeah. i do. and they kinda just. sit there for a minute and then foggy's like 'ok. im gonna kiss you now punch me if you hate this, flowerboy' and matt absolutley does not punch him, thank you very much

and when they finish having their moment matt's like 'wow. i shoulda....i shoulda asked to feel you up again way sooner if i knew you were gonna do that' and foggy's like 'hey...i'd let you feel me up anytime' and they both kind of laugh and decide ok, worm, this works, and decide theyre gonna do that more often

they start to go out for drinks / dinner / lunch / any time they possibly can, and matt learns the curvature of foggys (suprisingly muscley?) arms down to a t, but he runs out of space to run his fingers over one night, and foggy kisses him and says 'hey. i've got more tattoos, y'know, but i don't think many people would appreciate it if i showed them off to you here' and matt is like 'wh-O H'

and foggy laughs and drags him to his apartment and pulls of his shirt and says 'ok, we're alone now. tell me what you feel' and matt sits on the bed in front of him and theres lots of sensual chest stroking going on and then yeah. matt gets fed up with all this touching foggy and not enough of foggy touching him and. they fuck oopsie

and after that they decide worm. that was good, wanna do that more often, holy shit, and decide to actually date date and thats like. thats that babey!

but years later they open a joint shop, an absolute mess of soft/punk aesthetics and everyone knows them because matt is still a soft florist who just has a fewwwww dozen flowers inked all over him and foggy is the punk god who flexes his sleeves all over town but flexes his soft boyfriend husband even more tHE END

#long post #mattfoggy #hcs

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bolbianddolanhouse · 5 years

Text

BNHA AU [self insert]

Nani the heck is this? read here!

Chapter 4: Fuck my Drag right?

The events of the sports festival unfolded and everyone is being recognized for their feats. Iida has put his feelings for Ita on the back burner as his brother was disabled by the Hero Killer. The internships happened and everyone is coming back from them.

-Monday, in homeroom with Mimi and Jin-

“Y'all heard about what happened?”

“YEAH! bitch I’m scared”

“Me too, what’s going to happen next?”

“I’m just glad nobody died and that the students are ok”

“you say that because Glasses was one of the students”

“NO ITS BECAUSE I’M THEIR CLASSMATE! I would feel the same if it was you two”

“Aww Ita!” said Mimi and Jin, coming in for the group hug.

The mood changed when Diya sensei came in. He seemed unusually peppy from his usual neutral or gritty moods.

“Good morning class, lets settle down for some big announcements” he said with a smile that we didn’t trust. “As you all may have heard about the attack and the students involved, due to those incidents, our department has moved some lessons around to have our students more prepared to be ready to defend the others and each other.”

He takes out the syllabus,”if you can take out your syllabus so you can mark the changes” we comply.

“Ok so instead of just working on our semester final project until the marked due date, we also have to do our week long incognito lesson with practice starting Wednesday. In weaponry we’re going over defense and escape for next week. Our licensing exam is still in 2 weeks and the semester final project has been extended to 1st day of 2nd semester.”

I finish the changes and think, wow even we’re affected by all this.

Jin raises his hand

“Yes Matsui?”

“Are also having extra training sessions in prep for the licensing?”

“yes we are! thank you for reminding me” Diya sensei said “For the next 2 weeks, we will be training for most of homeroom and all of weaponry. For the ones that go to other classes, will still go to them and follow their schedule. If you have a free period, you can work on your projects then if you need school resources.”

Jin then looks at us and I knew he was going to claim us 1st before anyone else does. Bold of him to think I’d go with anyone else.

“Now that we have that done, on to the other news!” he said with another smile that made us feel uneasy, “our jumpsuits and gear came in! I’ll give them out in weaponry to see if they need to be re-adjusted. Secondly, we need to discuss the incognito lesson.”

I sit there thinking that it was going to be something like how to not look obviously like a spy/agent. Nope.

“For incognito week, you have to take up a persona and run with it for a full week. You have until Wednesday to come up with your persona along with clothing, makeup and voice pattern” Diya sensei said as straight faced as possible “Rules to adhere to: MUST be opposite sex, 3 different outfits, cause some chaos and keep your stories straight.”

I raise my hand.

“Yes Palma?”

“So this is just like Ru Paul’s Drag Race but we gotta lip sync for our grade?”

“Actually yea, exactly like that. So bring your best drag everyone! If you don’t have a certain part of an outfit or uniform, ask your classmates if you can borrow their’s for the week”

I suddenly love my class so much. We get to creating our personas and in weaponry we get our costumes. Mine thankfully fit and the gear was so cool that I could hardly keep my eyes off them. We get ear pieces and voice changers that fit right on the molars. I changed mine to make my voice a believable mezzo-tenor male voice. I then remembered I still have to go to my hero class and asked if I need to give them a fair warning before I show up in full boy drag. Diya sensei basically said that he’ll tell Aizawa but I don’t have to tell the class if I don’t want to. The cause some chaos rule is a free get out of jail card for us for that week, we can do anything but physical damage to property.

-Wednesday in Homeroom-

“AHHHH! I’m so excited!” I said to Jin “I can’t wait to show y’all my drag! I got a wig and everything!”

“I got fake hair buns and brought a dress for my extras, I already have some fem features” said Jin “did you bring the makeup?”

“yee yee, can’t wait to make you look sparkly and cute!”

Mimi walks in with their stuff.

“Sorry I’m lowkey late, the upperclassman that I asked to borrow their uniform pants was running late” said Mimi out of breath.

We started class and turned in our persona sheet to sensei and then we got into full drag. Jin was one of the cutest girls, persona name: Deez Natsu. Mimi was an ok looking dude, persona name: Suka Raboski. I looked more like an edgy boy, persona name: Takeshi Tboone.

“wow takeshi, thats a choice”

“Oof Suka I can see your lace”

“Y’aint at my level dawgs!”

We go through the rest of weaponry and walk out looking like completely different people. I get my things and sensei wishes me luck on fooling them.

-in the hero course classroom, before I arrive-

“Iida-kun, how is your brother doing?” asked Midoriya

“He’s doing better but it looks like he can’t walk”

“oh my, sorry if I brought up a sensitive topic”

“no it’s alright, you deserve to know”

Denki butt in “so Iida, are you going to ask Palma-san to a date today? Or am I going to steal your girl”

“Oh please, if you asked her out again, she’d give you another atomic wedgie but off the flag pole!” chortled Uraraka.

“tch just tell her already four eyes!” said Bakugo “I’m getting sick of hearing about her”

“I don’t think I can! I have too much on my mind already and I can’t manage a relationship on top of it all” said Iida.

“Bold of you to assume she’ll say yes” said Kirishima under his breath.

“Kirishima thats rude!” Mina said in defense.

I then walk in, with my bag slung over my shoulder, fuck boy posture and sunnies on. I had my stories in check, I copied some 2nd year’s elasticity quirk (my brother’s quirk that I can maintain for 5 hours with mastery) right before I went to class. So if anybody is gonna try me, I got me.

“Um excuse me, but who are you?” asked Shoji as I sat down.

“yea and that seat is already taken by Palma-san!” said Momo, ready to fight.

“tuh! That’s no way to treat a transfer, didn’t she tell you?” I said in my best tough guy tone.

“Palma-san didn’t say anything! where is she?! I swear if you hurt her!” said Iida in a demanding tone.

“She’s, not at school at the moment, so you’ll be dealing with me, Takeshi Tboone, American bastard.” I said as slick as I could. It was a true feat not laughing after saying bastard as your title.

“I don’t know why but he’s kinda cute” Hagakure whispered to Asui.

Aizawa sensei walked in and saw my grin and gave me the ‘i know’ look.

“forgot that was today, huh, well be kind to our transfer Tboone.” said Aizawa, also trying not to laugh.

“sensei, where’s Palma-san then?” said Jiro

“Palma-san is at the East-side hero school, on temporary transfer” Aizawa said while looking at the persona sheet I gave them the day before, “If Palma-san likes the other school better, she’ll stay there. And we’ll have Tboone-san for the rest of the remaining years until graduation.”

“why would she want to transfer? This is the top school!” exclaimed Iida.

“I see what she means by aggressive classmates, but I’m tougher!” I said “she doesn’t feel safe here dawg, she feels like everyone is after her and doesn’t like her so you better pray that she’ll crawl back here.”

Iida started to think that he should’ve never done what he’s done to Ita and convinced himself that it’s his fault that he drove her to transfer. Class goes on and the girls are all over Takeshi, which is bad because I didn’t plan on being an ACTUAL fuck boi. I pack up my things, which are just Jin’s things and Jin has mine, and I hear the delicate tip taps of a ‘girl’ running.

“Takeshi! Here you are my sweet~” said Jin, really playing the part of Deez.

“oh sup bitch come here and give me a little sugar.” I say as I stretch my arm out to grab them by the waist and pulled them into a fake kiss.

“I love it when you kiss me in front of other girls” he said as he gives side eye to the girls of 1-A, “you hear that! HE’S MINE!” as he jumps onto me.

Everyone was in shock, not only was he new but has a girlfriend?! Who the hell was that girl anyways?! Iida gets jealous that it could’ve been him and Ita if he spoke up sooner.

“Hey Tboone-san” said Kirishima with a warm smile.

“oh sup red-san”

“hahaha! The names Kirishima” he said “glad to have you in the class! that other girl was suspicious”

“oh word dawg? bitches be crazy!”

“Yea but you seem like the super manly type! wanna sit with us at lunch?” he said pointing at Bakugo, Sero, Mina and Denki.

“sounds tight! but I did promise my girl that I’d eat with her”

“I made fried rice!” Jin said, almost breaking character because he was really proud of his fried rice.

“Oh alright, maybe tomorrow then!”

“sounds litty, Later Red-san, Pink-san, Mad-san, Pika-san and Office Supply-san” I said while being dragged away by Jin.

“dude what the fuck, this is fucking crazy!” said Jin

“I know! where the hell is Mimi?!”

“That’s where we’re going, she’s swarmed by girls!”

We get to the patio and there they were, surrounded by girls. Mimi looked like they were gonna pass out because of all the pretty ones. I stretch my arms out and picked up Mimi from the circle and ran like hell to the intelligence wing. Jin deployed a portal before the crowd got to us and we portal in a pile inside of the commons room. We laugh a bit about our little tussle then I get a text, it’s Iida,

[Hi Palma-san I didn’t see you today in class and I have to say is that, I’m sorry, really sorry that you don’t feel safe or wanted at this school]

“oof guys look” I say as I show them the text.

“yikes what are you going to tell him?” Mimi said as I get another text, also from Iida,

[I feel responsible for you wanting to transfer. I shouldn’t have forced you to do anything. What can I do fix this? A lot of us prefer you over the transfer.]

“double yikes! a double text!” Jin said with a mouthful of fried rice, then I get another text

[ I know you won’t see these texts until later, but I miss you. Please respond when you can]

Jin and Mimi are looking at me, waiting to see what kind of melodrama I am going to start.

[Iida, I know you feel bad but the truth is, I feel unliked in the hero department. Everyone is pressuring me to be a hero or leave. Can’t I just learn about your culture without being part of it? I miss you too, you’re my only true friend in that class]

“wow Ita, this week is going to be spicy” said Jin.

He was right, everyone liked Takeshi a little more than Ita and hurt a little but the week was almost over. Sunday afternoon and I was getting my outfits ready for the next 3 days and I get a text, it’s Iida,

[Hi Palma-san, sorry if this is so sudden but are you available to spend some time with me? I’m in the area]

Oh jeez what do I say to that?

[Oh sure, where do you want to meet?]

[I can meet you in front of your complex]

[oh sure! just let me get dressed, let me know when you get here]

I quickly changed into a sun dress, did a low bun and some quick makeup to hide the fact that I partied last night with my class and woke up at 1pm.

[I am here in the front]

[ok, I’ll be right there!]

I teleport to the front and Iida looks at me like I was the most stunning thing on the street.

“Palma-san you look so pretty!” he said as he gave me a tight hug “I’ve missed you dear classmate.”

“oh! its only been four days.”

“doesn’t matter! point is that I want to spend time with you” Iida said as he released me from his embrace “shall we get going? I saw this cozy cafe that I wanted to check out.”

“Oh I frequent that place! I love it and I think you’d like it too”

As we walk to the place, theres heavy foot traffic. Iida doesn’t have a problem walking through but I was being pushed and falling behind. I reached out to grab his shirt to not lose him in the crowd.

“hm? Oh Palma-san! I’m sorry I didn’t know you were falling behind.”

“Oh I’m alright, I didn’t want to lose you in the crowd.”

“well then, here, take my hand” he said carefully holding mine “so we don’t lose each other”

I didn’t notice but Iida was blushing hard and I was just excited to order some berry tart and a latte. We get to the place and sat at a table where I could face the window and see the people passing by. We talked about Tboone-san and he really didn’t like the guy and I just sat there trying not to laugh. Iida changes the subject,

“So Palma-san, I’ve been thinking” he said as confidently as possible “that we should be honest with each other, now that we’re close”

“um ok, what do you want to know about me?”

“What name do you prefer to be called? What’s your favorite flower? Who do you like at school?-” he kept listing questions but my gaze was over at the window. I saw the boy with the lemon colored hair with his friends pass by and the boy so happened to make eye contact with me and didn’t break it until I was out of sight.

“Ita”

“hm? what was that?” Iida asked confused

“I like to be called Ita, Itati is my full first name but it doesn’t have the ring that Ita has”

“Ita...a cute name for a cute girl” he said and I choked on my latte.

“oh jeez I’m sorry hehe, I’m just not used to compliments like that, they make me uneasy”

“Why?”

“In America, when somebody compliments you like that and the person isn’t close to you, its like a form of bullying” I say as I stare at my latte “so when I got here and I got these compliments, I feared for my life for like two weeks.”

“I had no idea! I’m sorry that I made you feel that” Iida said while chopping his hands “I’ll be more careful”

“oh its alright, I’ll adjust!”

We walk around the area a bit more then he walks me to my complex. He grips my hand a bit tighter as we approach the front.

“hey Ita”

“yeah?”

“Have you decided if you want to transfer to that school?”

“I haven’t actually” I say trying to maintain my stories, “I have until the end of classes Tuesday to say yes or no.”

“Oh I see, it’s just that, I-I” Iida struggled to find his words “I promise to be nicer to you if you come back”

“what-”

“I mean it, I made you cry when we met. What kind of friend am I if I’m the cause of your tears and insecurity?! I’ll be nice, just come back”

I start to tear up, he really thinks its his fault. I let the tears fall, fuck this is dumb. He sees me cry and he panics and stops to wipe my tears. He cradles my face in his hands, if he didn’t make it clear that he wanted to be friends, I would’ve kissed him.

“Please don’t be sad, I promise to be sweet and kind to you from now on! I want you to feel protected and a cherished part of the school, if everyone is against you, I will be the one to be by your side. Okay?”

I cry even more, I think about how the hell am I going to break it to him that Tboone is just me in full boy drag and I’m not going anywhere. We say goodbye and I teleport in my room. Oof can’t wait for this whole thing to blow over.

-Tuesday, after school in the patio-

I was on my way to usual spot where I’ve been hiding to teleport near my house this week when I see some boys pestering somebody thats leaning against the tree. I get closer and see that it’s Kirishima and Bakugo. uh oh, time to initiate solo operation SAVE THE GAYS.

“yo yo yo! what’s the haps fellas?”

“we found these faggots being gay” said the taller boy of the bunch.

“yeah! we were about to teach them a lesson!” said the gremlin looking one.

“Oh yea? Fellas, allow me to take of this, eye sore.” I say as I put my bag down and stand in front of Kirishima and Bakugo with the other boys on either side of me.

“Tboone-san what the hell? I thought we were cool!” said Kirishima

I give a smirk as I stretch my arms out to the bullies. I give them the ass-whoopin of their life as Kirishima and Bakugo stand and stare how hard I was going. When they had enough, I grabbed them by the collar and said

“If I see any y’all pestering the gays being gays, I won’t hesitate to beat your homophobic asses and chop your dicks off and make you eat them, DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!”

“YES YEA PLEASE NO MORE!”

“good, I’m giving you to the count of 5 to get out of my sight before I give you another serving” I say clenching my fist as I let go of them. They scatter and run like hell before I could start counting.

“Tboone-san, that was so courageous of you.” said a still shocked Bakugo.

“That was the manliest thing I’ve ever seen! Tboone-san, how can we ever repay you?” said Kirishima.

“oh its cool dawg, I was just being a bro” I said as I was picking up my bag “see you later! your secret is safe with me.”

I walk away to my hidden spot and think, wow what a way to be remembered.

-Wednesday, in the hero course classroom-

“Hey Iida, do you think Palma-san is happy?” asked Tokoyami to a very deflated Iida as he stares at the emtpy desk.

“I don’t know, I poured my sincerity out to her and she sounded unsure.”

“Are you going to be alright Iida-kun?” Uraraka asked worriedly “you don’t look too well.”

“I’ll manage, don’t worry about me”

Class starts and I don’t show up to class because I needed some extra training for my licensing exam. Everybody else thinks it’s because I stayed at the other school and Tboone didn’t like the school. Aizawa knew the truth but didn’t say anything. Class ends and Iida walks to the patio to sit under a tree and ponder his text to Ita.

[Hi Ita, hope your having a good day at school. I need to tell you something important, I don’t care if you don’t feel the same way back. I like you, more than a friend, I’m sorry I didn’t say it earlier. It kills me that you’re not here, I spent most of class staring at your desk hoping you’d teleport in any moment. I was too coward to admit it but it’s obvious now, I have fallen for you. You’re as rare as a desert flower, as sweet as honey, as strong as a crashing wave, as beautiful as ]

he stops typing and deletes his text. He didn’t see the point of pestering her if she already made her choice. Meanwhile Ita is on campus but preparing for her licensing in 2 days. The rest of the school day passes and Iida walks to the parking lot, and to his surprise, he sees a very weary Ita walking to their car.

“ITA! ITA!”

I turn around “who the hell tryna get they ass run over?” I mutter.

I see Iida running toward me, giving me no time to escape, I brace myself for impact. To my surprise he stops before crashing into me and gives me a tight hug.

“Where have you been?! I thought you decided to stay at the other school and I got sad.”

“Oh no! I was doing extra training for my licensing exam, its in 2 days”

“Oh my apologies, is that why you look a bit roughed up?” he said releasing me from the hug.

“yea hehe I was struggling in detonate and defuse” I said as I showed him my bandaged hands “no copy quirking for me for a while.”

He gently took my hands in his, tracing the insides of them with his thumbs.

“In two days you say? Can I have the class see you off?”

“um sure if its ok with sensei, I don’t want to take away class time from yall”

The two days pass and as we were having our luggage check. The Hero 1-A class came out to see me off.

“Do your best Palma-san! We believe in you!” said a bunch of them.

“why is your class so small?” said Kirishima.

“Intelligence course class are the smallest because of the popularity of the course” said Jin “all of us wanted to be in the program and got admitted in without having to do the entrance exam.”

“Yep, even your dear sensei considered joining” said Aizawa “but I really wanted to stick it to the man with my abilities.”

“OOOH! I love your class pet!” Mina said fawning over Zippy the lizard “I wish we had one!”

“Please Mina, with our class, that poor creature won’t survive a day!” said Midoriya.

Our bus arrived and I turn to say bye and I get a tight hug from Iida.

“Be safe Ita, do your best! I’ll miss you”

“I’m only going to be gone for a day and a half!”

Everyone in the class was motioning Iida to kiss Ita. The kiss didn’t happen but I said my good byes and boarded the bus. The licensing happened at the USJ were we did target shooting, detonate and defuse, rescue the hero, save the citizens, and would you rather life or death edition (like would you rather but with people and guns). The class passes the exam, including Zippy, it was the 1st time in years the whole class passes according to Diya sensei. There was much to celebrate once we got back but on the way to the school, the bus breaks down. Instead of waiting for the repairs, since we were a mile away from school, we pushed the bus all the way to school. We used our quirks and strength to push the bus and everyone on that road stopped to admire our teamwork. When we got to school, we made so much noise hollering that we passed and pushed a whole bus to school, it drew alot of attention to us and anyone within earshot came out to see.

“ok ok everyone lets settle down” said a very tired Diya sensei “Miss Palma, if you teleport in, you can still make it to your hero class.”

“Oh ok are you sure yall don’t need help bringing in stuff?”

“No we have things handled, go! you have 5 mins before it starts”

“got it! Thank you!”

-Meanwhile in the Hero 1-A classroom-

“I think Palma-san is back” said Denki walking back in the classroom “a group of students are hollering in the front of the school”

“Wonder what happened?” said Todoroki

“Her entire class passed” said Aizawa as he walked in “including the lizard.”

“That damn reptilian passed?” Bakugo said astounded “tch this licensing exam will be a piece of cake if a lizard can pass it!”

Mina raised her hand.

“We aren’t getting a class pet and train it to be a hero for the last time Mina!” said Aizawa at his wits end with the requests for a class pet. “Just because their sensei let them, doesn’t mean I will. Besides, those kids are on another level of smart, that lizard knows how to drive a small vehicle.”

As everything is happening in the classroom, I am too weak to teleport in the room so I teleport in front of the Hero wing and start booking it. As I run, I start to mentally prepare for all the questions and what stories to tell. I get distracted and I run into somebody and I fall back. Fuck I think, this is so embarrassing.

“sorry! I was in a rush! are you-” I start rush apologizing then I saw their face, it was the lemon haired boy. They we’re standing there, looking at me.

“I should be the one apologizing! You’re the one on the floor” he said extending his hand out to help me up “say, aren’t you that American student? From intelligence?”

“Um yes, how did you know?”

“I’ve heard about you and caught some glimpses of you in passing” he said “I am impressed by your accomplishments, I’d love to see you in action”

“oh uh thank you, sorry to cut this short but I have to get to class” I say as I start running again.

“Bye! I hope to talk to you again!” waved the lemon haired boy.

I start to think, he’s cute, I wouldn’t mind talking to him again but who is he? I get to the door and I walk in out of breath.

“Hi, I’m alive” I say as I do a weak spin into a dab.

“Nice track suit Palma-san” said Momo “was it custom made?”

I look at my track suit, it’s a black and orange with my last name on the butt. “oh it is custom but my sister sent this to me to pester me about my big ass” I say as I show everyone the PALMA on the butt in big lettering.

We start class and they announce their licensing exam is also coming up along with their final exams and training at an undisclosed forest campground. Lucky for me, they don’t apply to me but I still train with them when it’s class-time. I notice that Iida wasn’t talking to me or looking at me like he usually does. I wonder what happened while I was gone. Class ends and I pack my bag and think about that boy in the hallway again, can’t believe I didn’t catch his name.

“Hey Ita” said Iida softly

“Hi, are you doing alright? You look a bit distracted.”

“I’m fine! um do you want to have lunch with me in the patio? I packed food”

“oh sure let me tell Mimi and Jin” I say as I stick my finger in my ear.

“this is Palma, contacting Oleshin and Matsui, over”

“Oleshin on the line/ Matsui on the line, over”

“Requesting a 508, repeat a 508, over”

“Permission granted/permission seconded, over”

“Thank you, have a good lunch, over”

“Wow you got ear pieces?” said Iida in awe

“Yea, we got them for in field practice but will special permission, the school lets the whole program use them to communicate with each other.”

We walk to the patio and sit under a tree. Iida takes out a fairly big tupperware container and hands it to me.

“Here, I made you a fresh treat, because you deserve it”

“oh thank you, you didn’t have to make me anything!” I said shyly

“I insist! You deserve some rest and treats for all your hard work these last few weeks” He said putting the container on my lap “I also have some fresh flowers, dark chocolates and lemon water. All just for you”

He arranges everything around me to set up a peaceful atmosphere. I open the container and I see perfectly cut cucumber, orange and mango with some lime wedges and salt shaker.

“Oh my god! It’s like I’m back home!” I say exclaimed as my mouth watered “you did your research, didn’t you Iida-san?”

“And what if I did? I just wanted to do something nice for you” he said as he closed his bag “you bring me peace during these scary times.”

“oh I see” I say as I start eating some mango “well, I’m glad that I am”

“hm? why?”

“Because, you could be out there, getting hurt again and blinded with rage and revenge. But you’re here, with me, healing yourself from the toxicity of it all.”

“I didn’t think of it that way, I just feel calmer and happier if you’re around me”

“I feel like I exist to be that peaceful and calm for the people around me” I said reminiscing the calmer times “back home, I brought order and peace in my household. With my friends, I give love and acceptance. And honestly, I haven’t felt like that since I got here but you helped me remind myself of the one thing that defines me. Thank you Iida-san.”

“Call me Tenya”

“Ok then, Tenya, thank you for making me feel cherished and myself again”

In the distance, the Baku-squad are spying through a 2nd floor window.

“I wonder what they’re saying?” said Sero.

“Who cares?! Four eyes is finally saying his stupid feelings to Palma-san” growled Bakugo.

“They’ve been spending alot of time together lately” pondered Kirishima “Maybe I was wrong about her, she might be just a foreigner that barely made it here.”

“huh? Palma-san was still on your suspicion list?” asked Mina “she’s really nice and cool, would a spy be that willing to be friends with us?”

“I still think I can woo her to a date” muttered Denki as he leaned against the wall.

The day ends and I get home in a happier state of mind. But the difficulty and heart twisting events are fast approaching, and I have to rise to the occasion to get through them. Not just for me, but for the ones that need me.

-End Chapter 4-

#bhna #mha #chapter 4 #not canon #ask me anything #self insert au #can you tell Iida is my fave lmao

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jeontaeh · 3 years

Text

〚THIRTY NINE〛

Jungkook got confronted by Hoseok, Yoongi, and Namjoon a week later.

He was in the library during the study period, listening to Dolly Parton while doing math homework. Because nothing solved calculus like some good old country music! He was halfway done when he heard a clearing of a throat.

"Jeon." A voice came abruptly, and Jungkook took his earphone out and looked up, raising his eyebrow when he saw the three boys. Namjoon in his glasses, Yoongi with his disheveled shirt sticking out of his trousers, and Hoseok looking slightly nervous.

"What?" Jungkook asked, voice flat.

With everything that had been going on so far in the school year, three of his best friends suddenly shunning him and pretending like he never existed was one of the worst. He was close to them. Maybe not how close he was to Jimin, but it still counted.

They ate lunch together every single day. Jungkook used to help Yoongi with his Chemistry assignments. Hoseok used to call Jungkook 'Kookie Boy' and always grin when Jungkook scowled. Namjoon used to help Jungkook with his English homework, always ruffling his hair afterward.

To just... ignore him like that. To completely push him away and even actively make homophobic remarks towards him. It sucked.

"We wanted to talk to you." Hoseok stated, and Jungkook saw the orange haired boy and then bit his lip.

"Okay..." Jungkook trailed and then saw Namjoon sigh. "Jungkook- we came here to apologize. About being so... rude about the gay thing."

Jungkook stilled. He looked at them with widened eyes. Hoseok nodded. "We were assholes to you. You don't deserve that, Jungkook! I've been wanting to apologize for ages, honestly. It just... it occurred to us suddenly how badly we fucked up." Hoseok mumbled.

"Why now?" Jungkook asked, and then saw Yoongi give him a look.

"Yesterday at football practice- one of the guys made a homophobic comment towards Sehun. Sehun didn't say anything, but V got really mad and yelled at everyone. Said stuff about how we were being ignorant and shouldn't make jokes like these." Yoongi said, hands in pockets.

Jungkook stilled. "Oh." Jungkook said, looking down at his notebook.

"We're sorry. Truly. Jin also kind of beat our ass." Namjoon said, and Jungkook bubbled out a giggle. "So yeah. We don't expect you to forgive us-"

"I don't. Not instantly. But- but people make mistakes. And you guys are still young, so the earlier you decide to change, the better." Jungkook said, giving the boys a small smile. Hoseok and Namjoon smiled brightly, while Yoongi just gave him a small smile. "I forgive you guys."

"Yay!" Hoseok said, and then jumped into the seat beside him, startling Jungkook. "You look bored as fuck doing maths. Let me show you this new track the three of us have been working on-" Hoseok said, taking his phone out.

"You guys do music now?" Jungkook gasped, grinning. It made him realize he hadn't had a proper conversation with them for months. Random small words exchanged during classes and football practice didn't count.

"Yeah! We rap." Namjoon said, and Jungkook giggled. "Or at least we try to." Yoongi added.

"I'm sure you're great! Let me hear it-" Jungkook said, and then got lost in mindless chatter with the boys.

///

kth_v

240 likes, 80 comments kth_v whats up broski

view comments...

eka11 change the caption instantly

jiminpark hottie thottie

eka11 @jiminpark "straight"

oohsehun wow

kth_v @oohsehun ?

minahearts you look so good 😍

eka11 v is so fucking hot

jeonjungkooks eka thats literally mex

eka11 mine too jungkook u aint special

jiminpark yall weird as fuck

jiminpark but he's hot tho mmm im straight but wow

jeonjungkooks why tf did sehun comment 'wow'

eka11 because he has eyes

jiminpark yah no offence i know u hate v or whatever but like damn must've been fun having sex with him

eka11 it really was

jeonjungkooks yeah

jeonjungkooks anyways u guys are the worst best friends why are you bringing up how good my 'ex' looks when im BOYCOTTING him

jiminpark sorry 👉🏻👈🏻

eka11 was he fun to top

jeonjungkooks i didnt?? top him?? why would i? im a Bottom 😙

jiminpark i know i saw the disposable vaginal douche in the garbage

eka11 omg i use that

jeonjungkooks omg wig

eka11 anyways wbk you're a bottom hows sehun been... is he still like 'fuck me daddy i'll be ur good little boy and take ur fat cock'

jeonjungkooks sehun has never said those words ever in his entire existence in humanity

jeonjungkooks and anyways idk we haven't had sex for a while

jiminpark 👀

jeonjungkooks like it just gets awkward so i just suck him off or something :/

eka11 no offense but why are u still dating him

eka11 he deadass cheated on u lmaooo

jiminpark didnt u cheat on like all of your boyfriends

eka11 this isnt about me

jeonjungkooks because he came over after that whole fiasco and i was crying he kind of comforted me and stuff and kept apologizing he told me that he was scared i dont like him back

jiminpark you dont

jeonjungkooks and idk i just had some fam issues so i was being mean to everyone sorry <3

eka11 its okay bby

eka11 but break up with sehun

jeonjungkooks i dont want to hurt him again! wait he texted me one sec

oohsehun babe there's a spring prom coming up omg lets go! matching clothes and all

jeonjungkooks we'll get bullied

oohsehun true

jeonjungkooks but sure sehunnie <3

oohsehun <3 <3 <3

///

"10-minute water break!" Coach announced, and the boys scurried off the field and towards the benches to go drink water. Taehyung heard him, but didn't care. He glared at the red circle on the goal post in front of him. He needed to hit the target at least once.

Taehyung hit the ball hard, fast. All the boys watched as the ball went straight towards the center of the goal, but missed the target by half an inch. The boys all gasped at how close he was, but Taehyung groaned to himself, crouching down and breathing heavily.

"V go get water. Don't exert yourself," Coach said, and Taehyung grumbled under his breath and stood up to walk over to the benches. The boys were all talking. Taehyung picked his water bottle and squeezed it tightly, squirting the water into his mouth.

"That's what good pussy tastes like."

"God, shut up." Taehyung begged Jackson, who huffed and turned away.

"Are you guys going for that Spring Prom shit?" Yoongi asked the guys, who hummed, some sounding annoyed. "Yeah. My girlfriend's making me. I rather stay in and fuck, but-"

"Tell me about it, bro. Talked to this girl one fucking time and suddenly I'm her boyfriend. She's making me go too. But we might have sex after, so I'm doing it." Another guy said.

"I'm going with Jungkook." Sehun said off-handedly, looking into space. Taehyung ignored how those simple words made it feel like someone straight up STABBED him.

"Dude... y'know ever since I've stopped thinking being gay was weird.... I realized liking dudes isn't much different than liking girls. Like, there are some dudes who are like... hella cute and shit. But I don't wanna date 'em. Y'know?" Jackson voiced. The boys snickered, some grimaced as if saying we don't know.

"You're probably just bicurious." Taehyung mumbled, and the guys looked at him, saw him wiping his sweat off with a towel. "Like you're straight but are into having sex with dudes too."

"Woah. That's a thing? Holy shit, I've been confused as fuck these past few weeks." Jackson gasped, and Taehyung hummed.

Sehun suddenly got up and left. Taehyung ignored him. He heard a gasp. "What does it mean if I like dick in my mouth?"

"You're fucking gay Bambam."

"Would you guys ever hook up with a dude? Like, for experimentation and shit?" Namjoon asked.

Jimin hummed. "Yeah. I wouldn't mind. How do I know I don't like it if I've never tried it?"

"Just like I know I wouldn't like your mom's pussy in my face."

"Fuck you."

"I guess I'd only hook up with a dude if I was really really into him. Not just like that." Mark mumbled, sounding weary.

"What about you, V?" Jin asked, looking at him. Taehyung looked at him, casually. He opened his mouth to speak. Right when he was about to-

"Guys Jungkook got us cookies," Sehun said brightly.

Taehyung didn't hear. "Nah I'd never fuck a dude. That's fucking gay, bro. I'm not into that kind of-"

Jimin coughed VERY loudly. Taehyung turned and saw Jungkook right behind him. Taehyung widened his eyes.

"Oh." Taehyung let out. Jungkook looked in disbelief. Taehyung's breath hitched. "Hey, um-"

"Seriously?" Jungkook asked, voice small. "Still?"

"Jungkook-" Taehyung tried, but Jungkook just snickered humorlessly and then moved away from Taehyung, grabbing Sehun.

"Meet me after practice." Jungkook said softly, and then kissed him on the mouth and turned around by the hell, walking away. Taehyung saw him walking away and sighed.

Jimin walked up to Taehyung after Sehun walked away, oblivious. Jimin looked at Taehyung. "How the fuck do you further fuck up something already so fucked up?"

"I don't know." Taehyung breathed out, and Jimin just shook his head, letting the boy deal with this mess himself. Taehyung saw Jungkook walk off the field as if he was disappointed, but not surprised.

"Boys, back on the field. Last one here has to take 3 laps-" Coach began, and all the boys got up and ran. Taehyung walked slowly, knowing he'd end up doing laps anyway because he stays back after practice to practice more these days.

"Okay boys. We've been target practicing to perfect our kick. And, I'll be honest, ya'll suck." Coach said, and the boys hung their heads low. "Like WOW. None of you hit the target even ONCE."

Taehyung pushed past the group of boys huddled in a circle and faced the open goal post which had the red circle in front of it. Still? Jungkook's words rang in his head. Taehyung saw the ball in front of it, and then took a few steps back.

Taehyung clenched his jaw and locked his ankle, eyes boring into the ball in front of him. He took a chaste step forward, hitting his planter foot to the right of the ball. His foot needed to control how the ball moved, rather than letting the ball control his foot-

Taehyung kicked the ball forcefully, feeling the power gliding smoothly down his calf to his foot as it merged with the ball and sent it spiralling towards the net. It hit the target perfectly.

The boys saw that and started clapping and shouting, some telling the coach that he took the L. Coach watched Taehyung and smirked, and Taehyung turned around and saw the boys.

"You're seriously as good as the pros," Youngjae said excitedly.

"We're so going to win our next match!" Hoseok said, jumping up and down.

Sehun suddenly shouted. Everyone froze and looked at him. Sehun groaned, putting his hands on his face.

"What're you doing, Coach?" Sehun asked, voice low. "Why'd you make me Captain?" Sehun asked wearily. Everyone widened their eyes, and Taehyung tensed.

"You alright kid?" Coach asked, and Sehun shook his head. He shook his head and then reached his hands behind his back and took his jersey off. He took the red material off and then chucked it on the floor.

"I don't want to be captain anymore. Not when V's clearly so much fucking better than me. It's not fair to him nor to the team." Sehun snapped, and Taehyung was frozen, eyes wide.

"Oh." Taehyung breathed out. Sehun was shirtless now, and breathed heavily. "I don't want to take something away from someone if it clearly belongs to them. And the position of Captain clearly belongs to you," Sehun said, and picked his jersey up and handed it to Taehyung.

"This is... really. Really fucking sick, dude." Taehyung said softly, in awe. "Fuck. I could kiss you right now." Taehyung grumbled to himself.

"R-really?" Sehun asked, eyes growing wide, glittering, cheeks turning a bit pink. Taehyung frowned at that.

"What? No. It was a fucking hyperbole- anyways! Thank you, Sehun. But I don't think Coach can-" Taehyung began, and then he heard a groan.

"Come on, coach! V should be Captain again! He's nice now, too! He apologised to Youngjae."

"He did WHAT?! Holy shit, he has changed!" Coach gasped, and then looked at Taehyung, who was gulping. "Look, kid. I have to discuss this with the principal-"

"Becoming Captain would help me get into a good school, coach." Taehyung said softly, hands coiled, eyes big. He reminded the coach of the kid he met four years ago, with ruffled brown hair and big brown saddened eyes, just sticking through because of the determination and passion he had for football.

"Jeez. Okay, um- I'll hold a vote tomorrow. After discussing it with the principal." Coach promised, patting Taehyung's back. "Now get back to practice!"

Taehyung smiled, and looked at Sehun, snickering. "You taking your shirt off was useless, by the way. This jersey has your name on it. Plus I still have my Captain's jersey-"

"It still made the statement though- you can't deny that." Sehun said, and then tugged his jersey back on.

"Thanks." Taehyung mumbled, looking away. He could never looked someone in the eyes while saying something nice to them.

"No problem. Consider it an apology for what I did... before." Sehun mumbled, and then chuckled awkwardly and ran away, flustered. Taehyung sighed to himself, coiling his fists.

I'm in love with your boyfriend, Taehyung wanted to shout out. But he didn't. Instead, he felt something. Certain confident courage he'd always had coursing through his veins.

///

"I'm sorry," Taehyung said two days later to Jungkook, who he found alone in the washroom, standing in front of the mirror.

"I'm not the person you should be apologizing to." Jungkook said softly, and then turned around and walked away- and that was the only interaction they had.

And then two days after that, Taehyung lifted his head up and saw Jungkook standing in front of his food table.

"Yourself. Apologize to yourself." Jungkook stated simply. Taehyung was confused, but Jungkook turned around and left, leaving him like that, with only those few words to hang on by.

The week passed like that. With a certain fog in Taehyung's mind. He thought about what Jungkook said. Apologize to yourself. He didn't quite understand. He wanted to know more, but Jungkook did tell him to leave him alone.

Taehyung saw Jungkook by the lockers and walked up to him, opening the locker beside him (even though it was Yoongi's, but, whatever) and hesitated.

"Why can't things go back to normal?" Taehyung asked aloud.

"I don't know what normal is with you." Jungkook said, and then walked past him. Taehyung closed his locker in front of him, leaning against it and sighing out.

Their next conversation was the night before the prom.

"Will you ever forgive me for hurting you?" Taehyung asked, standing by the water fountain. Jungkook was also by the water fountain, and Taehyung saw his fingers tighten around the ceramic sink.

"I already have." Jungkook breathed out softly, and then leaned down to the water fountain to get water between his pretty lips.

"Why're you with Sehun?" Taehyung asked, puzzled, leaning against the pillar which was attached to the water fountain/

"I like him."

"You don't."

"You sound quite certain for someone who's so shit with their feelings." Jungkook said sharply, and then brought his head up to look at Taehyung, who had a blank expression on his face. "Sorry," Jungkook said quicker, turning around and walking away, again.

The night of the prom arrived.

Taehyung stood in front of his mirror, looking at himself. He was wearing a white shirt, sleeves rolled to his elbows, making his veins prominent. Along with that, he wore black trousers. It was simple, but honestly, he was only going because Yoongi promised he'd give him weed after.

He heard a sharp knock on the door. Taehyung was confused as to who would come to his dorm, and opened the door, and saw Eka and Jimin. Taehyung's eyebrow rose at them.

"You guys look good. Shit, is it so fancy?" Taehyung asked, annoyed. Eka was wearing a tight silver dress, short and lifting her boobs up, her eyeliner sharp and lipstick black. Jimin had his hair swept back, showing his forehead. He was wearing a red suit.

"It is. You're not wearing that." Eka said, turning Taehyung around and pushing him into his bedroom.

"I literally don't give a fuck about this prom. I'm single and sad and want to get high." Taehyung protested.

"What the fuck is on your head," Jimin stated while looking up at Taehyung. Taehyung sighed. "It's a Gucci headband. I like wasting my dad's money."

"Understandable. Put this on." Eka said, having opened Taehyung's closet and taken out a black suit jacket. She handed it to Taehyung, who rolled his eyes and shrugged the suit jacket on.

"Here." Jimin said, picking out a Rolex watch from his desk and handing it to him. Taehyung wrapped it around his wrist, and then snickered to himself. "What?" Jimin asked, and Taehyung shook his head.

("You look hot as fuck in a suit." Jungkook said, eyes wide as he wrung his fingers around Taehyung's wrist. "C-can you fuck me with it on?"

"I can and I will.")

"Nothing. Just reminiscing the past." Taehyung said, and Eka huffed. "Dramatic bitch. Now come on." Eka said, walking out of Taehyung's dorm.

"You look hot as fuck, Eka." Taehyung said, putting his hands in his pocket. "In a friend kinda way."

"Thanks. I know." Eka said, and Taehyung snickered. Jimin eyed him and glared. Taehyung rolled his eyes.

They walked to the sports hall, where the Spring Prom was taking place. The student council went overboard with this Prom stuff. Decorating the hallways weeks before. Putting big banners which said 'SPRING PROM!' on them. Announcing it every goddamn day on the speakers.

When they walked into the sports hall, they saw it completely decorated. The sides of the walls were lined with paper mache trees which had pink blossoms on it. It looked pretty. Taehyung couldn't remember what the room looked like before, in fact. The tables on the side were lined with food and drinks. No alcohol, but someone always snuck it in. Teachers stood by the side, talking to themselves and looking around to make sure no one was doing anything wrong. There was a stage against the wall, some music nerds standing on it, playing music for the event. Everyone who went to the school was there, practically. People were dancing, talking with their friends, or just having a good time.

"Wow," Eka murmered, and the three walked into the room, looking around. Taehyung was bored already. "Why'd you guys come to my room by the way? Did you, like, know I was going to underdress?"

"No. You've just been upset for the past few... weeks. We were making sure you were actually coming. Yoongi told us about how he made you believe he had weed-"

"He was lying? Motherfucker. I'm leaving." Taehyung said, turning around sharply. The moment he did, he froze.

Jungkook stood by the entrance, looking around with his big curious eyes. He looked nervous, palpable hesitance showing from his stance. He was wearing a silky white shirt which was tucked into his tight black trousers, accentuating his waist. He wore a floral suit jacket and a choker.

"Wow," Taehyung let out this time, already feeling his insides going weak. Taehyung didn't see Eka and Jimin beside him give each other a knowing look, and then look ahead at Jungkook, who spotted the three.

"Hi!" Jungkook said, smiling and running up to them, looking less tense when he saw them. "Y-you said to meet me by the entrance." Jungkook said softly.

Taehyung wanted to give him a thousand kisses. "Sorry, Kookie. We came in. Doesn't this place look beautiful?" Jimin asked.

"Yeah! They're really going deep with this spring theme thingy," Jungkook giggled. Taehyung wanted to give him a million kisses now.

Jungkook looked at Taehyung, and tensed. Taehyung didn't know why. It was probably his presence. So Taehyung just gave the boy a small smile and turned around to walk away and find the other guys.

Jungkook, meanwhile, let out a small sigh. "He looks so good." Jungkook murmered to himself, voice gentle. "I wish he didn't."

"I know, baby. Don't think about him, okay?" Eka said, and Jungkook nodded. "Where's Sehun?" Eka asked, looking around.

"I'm here, bitches." Sehun said, and Jungkook looked at him and then rose his eyebrows. Sehun was in a bright blue suit and a black shirt and tie, smirking at them.

"Hey babe," Jungkook said to Sehun, who walked over to him, leaning down to kiss his mouth. Jungkook turned his head so Sehun could kiss his cheek instead. Sehun did, and then leaned back, scowling.

"You look... nice." Jungkook said.

"You too." Sehun mumbled. Jimin sighed, breathing out from the heavy tension in the room.

"Wow. Okay- um! Let's dance!"

The four began dancing away. Jennie, Jisoo, Lisa, and Rose joined the four, along with Yugyeom and Bambam. Jimin looked to Rose with a small smile, dancing closer to her. Jungkook was having fun, until he felt his hips being grabbed.

Jungkook got dragged to a body, and then realised Sehun had his chest pressed against his back. "You look pretty." Sehun said, kissing his neck, rolling his hips onto his back. Jungkook smiled at him, dancing back.

Sehun turned the boy around and then grabbed his waist. He reached down, kissing Jungkook's lips. Jungkook pulled away and then looked to the other side so Sehun wouldn't do that again.

"What's wrong?" Sehun asked, frowning. Jungkook shook his head, giving Sehun a smal smile. "Nothing," Jungkook reassured, putting his hands on Sehun's arms.

Jungkook looked to the side and saw Taehyung, leaning again a wall, sulking. Taehyung shifted his eyes around the room and then caught them with Jungkook's. Jungkook felt Sehun tighten his grip on his waist, and Jungkook just looked at Taehyung.

Sehun kissed Jungkook's jaw. "Do you wanna go to my room after this?"

Jungkook saw Taehyung give him a certain look. Jungkook wanted to move his eyes away, but couldn't. Suddenly, he felt a jolt through his body and turned his head, eyes widened when he was pushed back.

"What's your problem?" Sehun snapped, and Jungkook stilled. Sehun looked annoyed, eyes darkened, eyebrows furrowed.

"Nothing! I-" Jungkook began, but then saw his friends looking at the two weirdly. Sehun must've seen the same, because he grabbed Jungkook by the forearm and dragged him out of the sports hall.

Jungkook stumbled after him. "Se-Sehun-" Jungkook said, and then suddenly felt a shift as he moved out of the loud pink lightened room into the dark, vacant hallway. Sehun pulled him till the side and then let him go.

"What is it? You've been weird since we started dating- so fucking on and off. One second you want me, and another you're weirded out and want me to go away. I'm just trying to wrap my fucking head around all this, Jungkook- because- because you say you want me, but-"

"I'm sorry, o-okay? There's just a lot of things that have been going on-" Jungkook stammered.

"Then talk to me about them! I've asked you to at least try and open up to me so many times! But you just refuse to! Is it something wrong with me?" Sehun asked, frowning.

"N-no. No, you're perfect-" Jungkook said softly.

Sehun looked helpless. "Then what is it? Why did you get back together with me if you were going to treat me like shit after? You were so rude to me, and don't even talk to me sometimes when we're with Eka and Jimin. It's really awkward, Jungkook, to pretend I'm alright-"

"I'm sorry!" Jungkook cried out, and then stopped, looking at Sehun with watery eyes. The way Sehun was describing him reminded Jungkook of Taehyung.

"I-I'm sorry for- for being so weird. I just- I-I don't know, Sehun. I want to like you, I r-really do. I just can't fucking get over someone and it's r-ruining everything for me. I'm sorry." Jungkook let out, voice bubbly, as if close to crying.

Sehun tensed, and then looked down at his shoes, gulping a lump in his throat. "It's V, isn't it?"

Jungkook began crying, reaching his hands to his face to stop them, to try his hardest to stop them. Jungkook shook his head. "N-no. I don't- I am over him. I am."

"You like him." Sehun said, looking away. "He likes you too-"

"No Sehun. He d-doesn't. He just wants to have sex with me, that's all-" Jungkook tried, but Sehun snickered, looking away.

"That night. That night when we first had sex. When you left suddenly to comfort V- did you two do anything?" Sehun asked, fingers coiled. Jungkook sniffled. "Because the next day you were all fucking over him-"

"Sehun-"

"So he wants you for sex, huh? And you're still hung over him? Even though you have guys who like you for you?" Sehun asked, and Jungkook looked down, clenching his fists and shutting his eyes. "That's pretty fucking pathetic, Kook."

"I know. Stop telling me, p-please." Jungkook tried, and Sehun tsked.

"I don't want to be rude. You just made me feel so fucking shit for the past few weeks. If you just told me I was a fucking rebound for an asshole-"

"Y-you w-weren't-"

"-I wouldn't have ever asked you out. You probably just did it to make him jealous. I'm so fucking stupid." Sehun muttered under his breath, looking away. "Well, honestly- I don't care much. You're hung over a dude who's probably going to slap you across the face when you say no to him-"

"He wouldn't!" Jungkook cried, tears rushing down his face. Sehun looked at him, pausing. "H-he wouldn't fucking do that! You don't know him, no one does! I don't either, o-okay? I thought I did- I-I thought I knew him, b-but I don't! And I'm still in love with him, i-is that what you want me to tell you?" Jungkook shouted, voice breaking.

"I f-fell in love for a guy who doesn't give ha-half a shit about me. And I'm sorry." Jungkook squeaked out weakly. Sehun let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Jungkook felt the warm tears running down his face and put his hand over his mouth, shoulders trembling.

"I'm sorry. I-I need to go. I'll ask Jimin and Eka to come here-" Sehun said, and Jungkook didn't care, just slid down the wall, sitting down on the floor like the fucking mess he was- tears running down his face.

Jungkook sat there for a bit, crying softly. He felt the same feeling he had back when Taehyung told him he didn't mean anything to him. When Jungkook found him sleeping with Eka, and Taehyung slammed the door in his face. So fucking hurt.

"Kookie," A soft voice came, and Jungkook looked up.

Taehyung had his eyes big, looking at the pretty boy on the floor, tears in his eyes and stains of it weaving a path down his cheeks. Taehyung had one hand in his pocket, heart thudding as he crouched down to face him.

"K-Kookie, you-"

"Don't." Jungkook said, and then closed his eyes. Taehyung didn't push him. He just looked at him. "P-please. Leave me be."

"Not when you're like this, I can't." Taehyung said softly.

"God f-fucking damnit, Taehyung- stop pretending you c-care about me! You'll j-just lead me on to hurt me again. You don't know how I felt for those two months w-we spent together, Tae. You don't. Just. Please go." Jungkook said meekly, sniffling and looking up at the ceiling.

"I-I do care." Taehyung said, but he sounded hesitant, and it made Jungkook chuckle.

"You still think you're straight, Tae." Jungkook let out, voice weak. "You're far from being able to care about me."

Taehyung froze. He looked at Jungkook, who stood up from the floor, eyes slightly red from the tears. Taehyung's breath hitched, and then he let out- "I-I'm so fucking scared, Kookie. I'm not as- as brave as you. I never will be."

"T-then come meet me when you are." Jungkook stated, and then left, leaving Taehyung in the hallway.

Jungkook walked back in the sports hall, probably to tell Jimin and Eka of where he was, they were probably worried. Taehyung tightened his fists. He couldn't describe it. Couldn't describe the absolute fear that reaped through his body at the thought of-

At the thought of what?

Was it of everyone finding out?

Was that what he was afraid of?

Or was it something bigger than that? His mother, his father, what they'd taught him. What his mother had left him with. That fear that he was doing what she would've resented.

But at the fleeting moment, at that split second, that passing of time when the moon glowed outside like a watchful guardian- Taehyung realized. He rose to his feet, standing up. His heart drummed loudly against his chest, as if on beat, heightening his senses and telling him to hurry up. He was running out of time.

Taehyung took a step forward, towards the sports hall. Jungkook. His beautiful eyes, how they looked like they'd been dipped in honey and the core of sunlight. How his giggles sounded like that of harmonious angels. How his smile would always make Taehyung feel so much... better.

Something he hadn't felt since his mother had died. A sense of belonging. Home.

Taehyung walked towards the sports hall and entered it, seeing people still dancing, some chill song playing. Taehyung couldn't find Jungkook. His heart was racing. His anxiety was brimming at the bottom of his stomach.

He felt, at that moment, like he could do anything.

Taehyung felt absolute impulse take him over. Adrenaline started pumping down his body, the same he felt at football matches. This felt like a football match, except the goal was something different, and his aim was fucking terrible.

Taehyung let go. He ran straight forward and jumped onto the stage, startling the dudes in the band. They all looked at Taehyung, who carelessly grabbed the microphone from the lead singer, some kid from the grade below. The kid looked annoyed, but Taehyung mumbled "It'll only take a minute."

The band stopped playing, and everyone groaned, annoyed that the music stopped. Taehyung cleared his throat into the microphone, and then took a deep breath. "Shut up!" Taehyung shouted loudly, and everyone in the room shook.

Everyone went silent and turned to look at him with wide eyes, as if wondering why the fuck he was yelling while standing on a stage. Taehyung looked around, and then spotted Jungkook. The boy was facing away, grabbing his phone and trying to walk over to the exit.

"Wait." Taehyung said, and Jungkook paused and looked at him, a blank expression on his face. He looked annoyed.

Taehyung looked around. "Hi guys." Taehyung said, seeing all these kids he'd seen every day for the past three years. "This- this prom is cool, right? Like the- um- flowers and stuff." Taehyung stammered, and then cleared his throat.

"Okay. Hello. I've never formally introduced myself. Most of you know me as V. Captain of the football team." Taehyung said, and saw Sehun in the back of the room, frowning as well. Taehyung took a deep breath, seeing all the students looking at him with wide eyes. "But- but most of you don't know my real name."

Taehyung gulped. "I'm Taehyung. Kim Taehyung." Taehyung said, and there was a hushed whisper that fell across the room. He'd never said his full name out loud like this.

"Most of you know me as that asshole that bullies you, probably. Fair enough. I've made mistakes. A lot of them." Taehyung said. "I don't expect to be forgiven. I just want you to know I'm trying. And I'm changing, and growth is- is normal. It's normal." Taehyung said, nodding.

Everyone looked confused, still. They wanted to start dancing again, probably. But most actually looked intrigued, never having seen the guy speak more than 3 words at best which weren't insults.

"I'm standing here right now because I made a mistake. A really big one." Taehyung said, shaking his head. "I hurt someone. Badly. I hurt someone over and over again, and I shouldn't have. By the time I realized how much the person meant to me, it was too late." Taehyung mumbled, and everyone looked more confused.

Taehyung looked around, and then spotted Jungkook standing beside his friends, just the hint of confusion on his face. Not like the others, though. A more of disbelief.

Taehyung scratched his head, and then sighed loudly. "God, there's so many of you. I swear it's like the new crop of freshmen are, like, so goddamn small. I was so much taller when I was your age, what the hell-" Taehyung mumbled, and then looked around, hearing some laughs.

"I'm rambling, fuck. Shit! Sorry, forgot I couldn't swear. Ah damn, I swore again. Fuck-" Taehyung began, and then hit his head with the mic, and looked ahead, taking a deep breath.

Fuck it. Nothing matters. Not as much as him. Nothing has ever mattered as much as he has. "I'm sort of in love with someone." Taehyung let out, and there were gasps that spread across the room.

Taehyung couldn't see Jungkook's eyes- didn't want to, in fact. "I'm sort of, really, really fucking madly in love with someone. And that someone is standing here right now, and god-" Taehyung let out a chuckle, covering his face. "You'd never think I'd be the type to- to stand on a goddamn stage in the middle of what looks like actual fairy shit and confess my love to someone, but-"

Taehyung looked ahead, and then found Jungkook. Jungkook had his eyes widened, mouth slightly agape. Taehyung smiled. "You change me." Taehyung said, words soft. "You m-make me... a better version of myself. I'm not mean when I'm with you. I'm not sad. I'm not an asshole. You make me study harder, you make me play harder, you make me... harder." Taehyung said the last part, and then started laughing.

"Shit- I just realised there's, like, 200 other people in here. I'm kidding! Don't have sex till marriage! Or, do. I don't know. Sorry Ms. Yang!" Taehyung said, and everyone started laughing. Fuck, he was going crazy. He couldn't get a hold of himself, but suddenly- suddenly it felt like he was so free. So free, so free from everything that's ever been holding him back-

"You know what else?" Taehyung asked, looking around the room. "I'm bisexual!" Taehyung shouted out, and everyone shut up real fast.

Literally EVERYONE's eyes widened and jaws dropped. Girls he'd slept with looked surprised, guys he'd bullied looked mad, people who didn't know him looked shocked. His own friends looked the most shocked.

"Yeah! I like girls, and I like guys. And there's nothing wrong with that. Like, at all. Wow. Oh my god. I said it out loud." Taehyung let out, whispered. "Fuck, okay. Shit. Yeah. It's out there. I'm bisexual. I'm bi-fucking-sexual. I'm so fucking bisexual. Wow. WOW-"

"Dude. The teachers are gonna cut the sound off any minute. Stop swearing." The lead singer dude whispered, and Taehyung nodded.

"Oh- okay okay. Sorry. No more swearing." Taehyung agreed, and then looked ahead and saw Jungkook standing behind Jimin, looking nervous, eyes wide, hands bunched up into fists.

Taehyung looked around. "I've never spoken so much. I just- I can't believe this. I feel so free, y'know? Like- like I'm high as hell, but sober. Not that I know what being high feels like, Ms. Yang don't worry." Taehyung reassured, laughing.

"Who are you in love with?" A voice shouted from the audience, and Taehyung looked.

Taehyung gulped. He leaned into the mic. "A boy." He whispered, and gasps spread across the room again. Taehyung giggled at how surprised everyone looked. "I'm so in love with him, you guys. He's the prettiest boy in the whole goddamn world. Maybe universe. Haven't seen aliens yet. Actually- scratch that. He's the prettiest boy in the universe."

Jungkook hid behind Jimin properly now, hands covering his face, his whole body trembling lightly. Taehyung gulped. Here goes.

"I'm Kim Taehyung." Taehyung said, voice clear. "I'm bisexual." Taehyung said, and then smiled. "And I'm so goddamn in love with Jeon Jungkook."

People literally started screaming. Jungkook squeaked out in surprise and got pushed out into the center by Jimin and Eka, who both looked thrilled as hell. Jungkook still had his face covered, because everyone was looking at him, eyes wide, mouths wider.

"He's WHAT?!" Yoongi shouted from the side, slapping a hand over his mouth.

"Oh my fucking god." Jin whispered, eyes wide. "Oh my god oh my GOD-"

"Guys someone drugged Taehyung and put him on that stage." Namjoon said. It was the only explanation.

"This is brilliant." Yugyeom whispered, eyes glazed. Bambam grimaced. "I fucking knew it. He always looked at him weird."

Taehyung looked at Jungkook, heart racing rapidly, stomach making a thousand turns a second. "Baby?" Taehyung said softly, not caring how that made everyone go even more in shock. "I-I can see you, you know that, right?" Taehyung chuckled fondly.

Jungkook put his hands down, blushing brightly. His eyes were filled with tears, fists clenched beside him. People had moved out of the way, so there was a clear spacing between the stage and where Jungkook was stood, so the boys could see each other clearly.

"Jeon Jungkook." Taehyung whispered into the mic. "I know- I know I'm the biggest douchebag you ever met. I hurt you. I was an asshole." Taehyung said, suddenly growing fearful. "I'm so fucking sorry, baby." Taehyung said, voice weak.

Jungkook just sniffled from where he was stood, cheeks so pink and fists so tightly clenched that he couldn't speak. Everyone was staring between him and Taehyung in awe, surprised, shocked, just couldn't believe that V, the homophobic fuck boy captain of the football team- was out here passionately declaring his love for a boy.

"R-right before I got on this stage, I thought about how you came out to everyone. Always so ridden by impulse, my Jungkookie," Taehyung said with a small fond smile, and people aww'ed. Jungkook bit his lip, looking down.

"So, I'm going to ask this. I'm really really really fucking scared." Taehyung admitted, and then took a deep breath, and closed his eyes.

Be brave. Taehyung opened his eyes. "Jeon Jungkook?" Taehyung whispered, voice barely coherent. "Will you be my boyfriend?"

https://jeontaeh.tumblr.com/post/647264967393984512/forty

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avimour · 5 years

Text

weird dream: spiderman was trying to escape someone idk and ended up in a band class being directed by hannibal lecter in a mustache (i say hannibal and not mads bc i knew in my heart it was hannibal at that moment in the dream) and spiderman picks up a accordion so he doesnt look like the odd one in and he played his parts perfectly. after the class hannibal walked over to spiderman, put his hand down on his shoulder, and told him he’d love for him to join the band now in my dreams i usually stay on the same topic, which was spiderman being the accordian player in hannibal’s band, but my brain decided to transition to a different place in this same time era, and that was two kids bored in detention. weird thing: their detention was located in a ward for the most dangerous criminals, which for some reason was located right by their school, which was connected via parking lot. so the kids notice their supervisor walking away to go do whatever thee fuck supervisors do, and they took off. they decided to go investigate the most dangerous criminals. they looked through the slots at all of them, making jokes and whatever, before they get to the cell labelled hannibal lector. they noticed he wasnt in the room, so they somehow unlocked the door, and started investigating around the room. in doing so they found a piece of cloth covering this huge-ass hole, which went real far down into the earth, so far down they couldn’t see the end of it. a little cut in my dream shows me hannibal in his prison uniform digging this hole with a plastic spoon and a plastic fork. back to the present, the supervisor grabs these two kids, however hannibal lector also grabs these two kids. ‘naughty children shouldn’t go poking around other people’s homes’ is what he said. or something like that.

turns out hannibal lector is the supervisor, and he’s just wearing a mustache. he broke out of his cell and got a job as a band director and as a supervisor for detention. i have no idea how but he’s hannibal so i guess he had a way. the dream cuts and it seems the person watching the security cameras has figured out that hannibal lector isnt in his cell anymore, and calls for all the supervisors to go investigate. the kids hold onto two of their supervisors, one of whom appears to be jefferson davis, and tell them not to go investigate with the others, and that they dont want them to be ‘marked’ jefferson raises an eyebrow at this, but listens to the kids. a montage of the supervisors investigating hannibal’s cell, where they look into the hole, and go ‘oh thats a fuckin big hole the fuck?’ and supervisor hannibal goes ‘funny.’ and then kills all the supervisors in that room. he kills them all in weird ways, and eventual takes an eye from one, a tongue from another, an ear, a foot, and a hand. its at this point that alarms are going red and all the kids from detention come running to hannibal’s room, where they accept the gifts he gives them. all the kids from detention were missing something, such as an eye, tongue, ear, foot, and a hand. they magically fuse onto their bodies? anyways hannibal and the kids escape into the parking lot, where they locate a big van, a la soccer mom style. him and the kids get the fuck out of there, and on the way they pick up the rest of the band, including spiderman whose still wearing his spidey suit. note: i have no idea which spiderman this is. at first it was tom’s, however it could be any spider at this point. my dream gets fuzzy at this point because my cat was sneezing into my face and trying to wake me up. i managed to ignore her and go back to sleep. while im watching them do this cop escape scene, the cops not wanting to shoot the van, i say in my head ‘i wish will graham was here.’ and then realize he can be! because this is my dream! so. spiderman unmasks and it’s will graham, releasing a gasp from everyone and hannibal going ‘fuck’ because this is season 2 will graham, who wants him dead sometimes and wants him to marry him the other times. will looks at hannibal, andt hen at the kids. “we have to adopt all of them. and the whole orphanage, or the cops will never stop chasing after us.” will says “we?” hannibal replies back, dodging a massive hole in the ground “yes.” my dream fuzzes again because my cat is getting angrier that im not waking up, and spits in my face a bit. i realize that my cat is going to keep doing this and i need to wake up soon, but i want to continue my dream. so a montage it is. a montage of hannibal and will adopting a lot of kids, just a bunch of them, because for some reason the cops cant arrest them and send them to jail if they have this many kids? anyways they find this little castle they live in and start to build out their territory, creating a beautiful kingdom, and hannibal goes ‘i must get something amazing for will’ and so he digs another hole/cave this time going under another kingdom which has this rare emerald that is a dark green and flashes to a deep red in the right sunlight. he manages to steal these emeralds, out of a well, from the king of this land, and returns to his holecave, when we hear the king go ‘NO!’ my cat once again tries to wake me up, causing the dream to fuzzy and go to a different time this time, hannibal and will arent here, instead its one of their sons whose become the king, and his wife that he married from somewhere the king is playing a game with his children where they avoid the spooky ghost lady, and try to find all the notes. only problem is that the king recognizes the spooky ghost lady to be a grown up version of his lost first born daughter, who has disappeared from her bed one morning. he figures out a way to save her, causing the black goo to fall off of her and for her to be revealed. she is quiet, but tears are still going down her face. the king, over-excited about his daughter being alive, takes her back to the castle, but along the way he notices two cords on the ground, in a nature traily place, and follows them, to find an old corpse on the ground, with a noose around his throat, and a empty noose beside him. his daughter then speaks up. “‘i love her. she is the most perfect being on this planet and i would kill anyone if they tried to hurt her. i shall steal her from her bed, so that we can be one together.’ then he took me out here and hung both of us. but, a princess cannot die, so i just suffered for years instead. kids using me as a fun late-night game. until you saved me father.” and then they cry and the dream fastforwards again. this time its a prom? prom night? whatever. and the princess is talking with one of her siblings. they’re talking about who they’re going to dance with or whatever, when one of them gets a magical ping, and sees troops outside the city walls. they quickly alert the kingdom of the incoming battle a cut again, my cat is wanting me awake real bad, and this time i see a car. the car is a black fancy breed of car, and inside is three people. one a bouncer, another a noble british lady which you can tell by her tall powdered wig and her white face makeup, and the third is a young prince, who is sick and keeps complaining about a headache. the car pulls up to the wreakage of the city’s gate, where there’s dust and rocks everywhere, and we see the princess come out of the wreakage, and wave her hands. she’s wearing some sorta biker getup, but without a helmet. the car stops, and the bouncer rolls down the window “hey, are you okay?” asks the bouncer “like, no! i just want to go home. my boyfriend should be back where you came from.” the princess gets into the car, the bouncer having invited her in. “Alright. lets go find your boyfriend.” the bouncer backs the car up and turns around, heading back the way they went. “whats your name?” asks the prince “almara.” replies the princess “almara. that sounds familiar?” the prince scratches his head. “it should. this is a hostage situation.” almara pulls up her magic, placing it at the young prince’s head. “oh fuck!” scrreches the british lady “its okay guys, ive been in a hostage situation before. we will all make it out of this if we jhust listen to the princess.” almara has them turn the car back round, and has them drive it to the castle, where she gets out with only the young prince, and takes him to her father. “why?” is all her father asks of the prince “to get back the crystals your fathers stole from my father!” cries the young prince. my dream fuzzes again, and this time i get a little scene. the king and one of his kids, are looking at the crystals in a well. ‘can we show mom?” asks one of them “no, she’d have a heartattack.” the king pulls out a straw, which contains a crystal a tip of the crystal is eaten. the scene changes back its weird because my cat is really mad at this point, and so i cant really described what happened that well. apparently the king gave the young prince some lip, and then hannibal and will appeared, dressed to the nines in fancy king clothes, and tell the young prince to fuck off and that they never stole the crystals. the prince screams as the pain in his head starts banging against his skull. the dream end. my cats are hungry and pissed at me for sleeping. i fed them and they are happy again.

#dream #weird dream #long post #i can tell this was inspired from my 3 day or 4 day binge of fable 3 #and i think spiderverse as well as dragon age weirdly enough #and also some scary game that john wolfe probably played

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