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#he still was like “i dont want to talk about that” regarding the rumors question.

drvscarlett · 28 days

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Sweet Nothings (2)

Carlos Sainz x pageant queen!reader

Summary: All that they ever wanted was sweet nothings but everything changed like midnight rain.

Sweet Nothings: 1, 2, 3. 4

A/N: i indulged a lot with catriona so expect a lot of her faces. i like to build up things hehe.let me know your thoughts

YNjpeg posted a photo.

Liked by CarlosSainz55, LewisHamilton, and 543,456 others

YNjpeg thank you for the opportunity for the roundtable to discuss different issues faced by our society [link]

User4 the way she speaks says a lot about her character

User6 I dont need to see any other queen, Y/N is my Miss Universe 2024.

User7 i never knew Y/N is this knowledgeable

User9 right?? i mean before we all knew her as just Carlos' partner User10 is it bad for me to say that i think Carlos and Y/N break up is a good thing? User9 true bestie.

LewisHamilton Wonderful insights, thank you for using your voice!

YNjpeg honored to be appreciated by you Lew! LewisHamilton 👑☝️ User12 real recognize real!

User55 anyone notice that carlos is still liking?

User90 omg i just noticed that! User77 my divorced parents

F1News posted an article.

Carlos Sainz sits down talking about championships, end of contracts, and relationships.

The hottest topic in the paddock at the moment has been Carlos Sainz. He is the driver that has been to watch out for as he becomes the El Matador that crushes Red Bull's streak of victory. The soon to be ex-Ferrari driver thanks the team for building a good car and creating new strategy that allowed them to best Red Bull several times already.

It was no surprise that him and teammate, Charles Leclerc has been chasing Max down for the championship. When asked about how does he deal with the pressure, he mentioned that he kept himself grounded by a note tucked inside of his helmet. He said that the content of the notes cannot be discussed (as well as the writer of the note) but he is very grateful for it for keeping him in touch with reality. The Spaniard is currently sitting at the second place with only 2 points difference from the current champion.

"It has not yet been decided" this is what Carlos has to say regarding where he would sign next. Carlos assures everyone that there are offers but he is still weighing which will be a better option. His focus at the moment was not on the signing because as he states "if I'm a good driver then the offers will just keep coming." He wishes to focus on doing his best with his current team and reiterates that he has no ill feelings with the team.

Another hot topic that Carlos was asked about is regarding his love life. There were rumors about his split with long-time girlfriend and now running for Miss Universe, Y/N L/N. Carlos explained how he is very proud of Y/N and that he wishes all the best for her. He refused to answer questions detailing more about her since he explains that "focus on Y/N as a beauty queen and not because of her relationship. She deserves more than just being someone's girlfriend."

CarlosY/N4ever

CarlosY/N4ever me realizing that Miss Universe 2024 and the Las Vegas Grand Prix is happening together???!!!

User5 wdym together???

CarlosY/N4ever It will both happen in the 24th,the gp will go first at 2pm while the Miss Universe will start at 6pm. User5 OHMYGOD????

User7 So are we going to watch miss universe or f1???

User8 Im gonna watch both User9 rip to us with a different timezone

User10 i love how we can use Y/N's reactions for this

User11 girlie is a walking meme User13 walking meme but still elegant

User19 SO WILL THE GRID BE WATCHING????

User22 what is barbenheimer when we have this going on!!!

QueenYNUpdates just posted a reel

Well my gowns and my costumes have been carefully selected. Everything has a meaning. It is an homage for my country and of course to the best parts of myself. [Can we have any more insights about your evening gown] All I can say is that I want to make Filipinos proud and the color has a very personal meaning.

User10 Im excited to see her final look!

User12 agreeeee,her attention to details is everything!

User7 Our filipina queen! PERIODT!

User13 the color has a very personal meaning + that smile.. anyone wanted to bet with me that its ferrari red???

User15 I might cry if its really red User18 and its carlos' last year to ferrari as well User90 I just want to have a good time on this app

User55 Go fight for the crown!!!! Bring home the crown!!!

QueenYNUpdates posted a reel

[What can you say about your relationship with Carlos, everyone is curious about what happened] This is the only time, I'll talk about this. If you are looking for drama, there is no drama between the two of us. Carlos and I met when we were still young people and we grew up together. We matured as individuals..Its not a bad thing. I am extremely happy and proud of where he is right now. Were both chasing our dreams. What we are, what have been. Its all good. That's all that I have to say.

User5 This basically confirms it.

User6 we are really children of divorce

User7 CARLOS GET HER BACK, ITS NOT TOO LATE

User8 YEAH SHE IS NOT YET MISS UNIVERSE User9 BRO DON'T LET HER GO CarlosSainz55

User11 Its the miss universe curse. If the girl really wants the crown then they will undergo heartbreak

User14 why do we have to sacrifice someone?? User15 so miss universe is just like ferrari strategy? here we sacrifice a boyfriend, in ferrari we sacrifice leclerc User17 that comment got me gagged.

YNjpeg posted a photo

liked by CarlosSainz55, LandoNorris, and 876,525 others

YNjpeg I am ready to represent!!! Flying to Vegas!!!

Charles_Leclerc goodluck Miss Philippines!!

YNjpeg thank you charlieee

LandoNorris can't wait to see you take the crown

YNjpeg lando you believe in me too much LandoNorris I SAID take the crown!!! YNjpeg ON IT!

User5 im so happy that she is still being supported by the grid

User67 bring home the crown Y/N!

User8 Mark my words, she will come back with the crown!

User9 safe flight!!!

CarlosSainz55 just posted a photo.

CarlosSainz55 You always hated flying. You told me that there is a certain discomfort and uncertainty when you are a thousand feet from the ground. Right now, you are flying. I know it has a certain discomfort and uncertainty of what's to come but I believe you can find some joy in it.

You will always be the most beautiful in the universe.

User7 OMG????

User6 CARLOS I WAS UNFAMILIAR WITH YOUR GAME

User8 bro really went to tell the whole world that he will be here no matter what

User15 were always talking about how Y/N is Carlos' biggest fan but Carlos is also Y/N's biggest fan

User17 ITS TOO ERALY TO CRY

CarlosSainz55 just deleted the post.

#carlos sainz x reader #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #carlos sainz imagines #f1 fic #f1 smau #carlos sainz x you

287 notes · View notes

chikkou · 4 years

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masterpost on the ryan haywood (and adam kovic) situation

so i already made this post as a more general “whats wrong with rooster teeth” post, as i honestly didnt expect the ryan haywood/adam kovic situation to go as far as it has - but at this point i think it’s much more prudent to put that information into its own post because the situation with both of these men, ryan primarily, has gone off the fucking rails

tl;dr for the situation: ryan haywood and adam kovic both had nudes leak and were outed as cheating on their wives as a result of being catfished, but a great deal more information surfaced after the initial leak which led to the discovery that ryan haywood is a manipulative sexual predator, and adam kovic may have been sending sexual pictures and videos of his wife without her consent.

i will try to break down this post chronologically as best i can and provide ample sources, and i will update it as new information is gathered. please be aware that many of these sources will be coming from kiwifarms, as it has gathered all of the relevant info into one place, but i will not be linking to the thread directly for a myriad of reasons, so if you want to find it, youll have to look for yourself. apologies if any of the screenshots contain disagreeable language; i wouldnt link them if they werent relevant.

general tw for pretty much everything in this post. all pictures of people will be largely sfw, but there will be nsfw text under the cut. i will not link to any nudes of ryan or adam. this is going to be long as fuck.

here goes.

NOTE: this post is currently up-to-date as of january 28th, 7:27 pm (EST).

GENERAL BACKGROUND:

adam kovic and ryan haywood are both employees at the entertainment company rooster teeth. ryan has been working there since 2011, originally for more behind-the-scenes work before becoming a regular achievement hunter staple, while adam kovic was a personality who originally worked for machinima before he and a few others branched off to become funhaus. funhaus was later purchased by the media corporation fullscreen, as was rooster teeth, and both were merged sometime in 2014/2015.

HOW THIS ALL BEGAN:

sometime in august, there were rumors circulating on certain forum sites that a catfisher had been sexting with a handful of e-celebs, and had their nudes. a torrent link was put up containing the files, but was quickly taken down. this didnt gain much traction, but was brought up again on the same forum in late september/early october. this time, the person posted images directly, showing that they’d been sexting with adam kovic and ryan haywood.

according to them, they didnt get very far with ryan and so there were only a small handful of his pictures and videos, but there were over 400 of adam’s nudes, also pictures and videos, and some of which featured his wife. after this news broke, a thread was made on kiwifarms to document everything (the thread was created on october 4th). another thread was made on /pol/ shortly before this, claiming that ryan was grooming underaged fans, and that both ryan and adam had sexted with fans (both of age and underage). no sources or corroboration for this claim were given at the time.

WEEK 1, DAY 1 (october 4th):

initially, most of the focus was on adam, due to the sheer number of his nudes and the content within them. while people were suspicious of the veracity of ryan’s nudes, it became clear that the photos of adam were legitimate, as his face was shown in several of them, there was no evidence of photoshopping, and he has a distinct tattoo which made it pretty hard to dispute. heres a more sfw picture as an example.

the catfish had all of these images on hand, and due to the “sent to you” header on top we know that they were sent directly to the catfish, and not taken from adam’s phone, meaning he willingly sent these images to the catfish. note that his wife was indeed almost naked in the background (wearing only underwear), and there are multiple pictures and videos of her completely naked and sometimes even engaging in sex with adam. after a bit of analysis, people came to the conclusion that the pictures of ryan were real, as well.

ADAM’S WIFE, JESS KOVIC:

no response came from him at first, nor his wife - the only indication she gave that she knew what had happened was this cryptic comment on her instagram account, which she has since privated. no one is quite clear what this reaction means, nor has she confirmed or denied whether she consented to the pictures and videos being taken and sent to others.

soon after, people who’d (puzzlingly) decided to sift through the nudes discovered something jarring - some of the nudes he’d sent appeared to have been taken IN the rooster teeth office. heres a sfw example, but there were at least a dozen others taken in the same location.

RYAN:

ryan’s nudes were largely ignored in the beginning - there were a great deal more of adam’s, and while ryan’s were pretty standard nudes, adam’s were much more plentiful and had a lot more variety in the... activities depicted, shall we say. people were also fixated on the status of his wife’s consent in the matter, and so little attention was given to ryan, who was simply deemed a cheater and left at that.

ROOSTER TEETH & THE FANBASE:

unsurprisingly, rt attempted to immediately suppress any and all mention of the scandal when it first broke. heres an image of a handful of threads that were made on r/roosterteeth that day; as you can see, the ones highlighted in red have been deleted, and all were about the leaks. comments on the official rt site were instantly deleted as well. no official comment from the company or any of the employees, though a former funhaus employee (rahul kohli) commented mocking adam for the situation, and implied that things were worse than we yet realized.

WEEK 1, DAY 2 (october 5th):

although adam had been the primary focus of the first day of the news breaking, it began to look like there was little else to discuss with him. at worst, he seemed to be a cheater, and potentially sent nudes of his wife without her permission. still disgusting, but as there was no comment from him and no new updates on his situation, attentions turned, and a slow rumble began bubbling up with more accusations about ryan.

ANONYMOUS ACCUSATIONS:

an anonymous twitter account, @brotherxteresa (whose account has since been suspended), claims to have been speaking to girls who’d been sexual with ryan. they state that everyone they’ve spoken to was of age - significantly younger than ryan, true, but still legally able to consent. however, they confirm that ryan has indeed been getting around with fans, both via sexting and in-person. he also strongly implies that the mods knew, and asks them to comment, but their responses are predictably vague. notably, though, is this tweet from @grandaddyskulls, in which they condemn “proven disgusting behavior,” heavily implying that the mods did indeed deal with “unproven” accusations against ryan in the past. unfortunately, there are no sources for this at this time.

on the same day, tumblr user @juggey creates this post, containing screenshots of a conversation they had with one of ryan’s victims. within those screenshots is this particularly interesting one, in which ryan receives a nude from the fan in question, only to ask, in an almost joking tone, if they “turned him into a felon” by sending a nude. they confirm that they are an adult, but it becomes clear that ryan did not know the age of the fan before getting sexual with them, and seems to have a very flippant and casual approach to this.

later on, this tweet is posted by @jasminewill123, confirming that ryan has indeed been messing with fans for years. no sources are posted, though, just a verbal confirmation. @brotherxteresa also reveals that he is speaking to someone who was solicited by ryan for sex when they were a minor in this tweet thread, but doesnt share any info, stating that the minor is saving it for a potential court case. there is also this tweet from someone stating that they slept with him in 2017, and that he claimed to have never had sex with a fan before and removed the condom mid-sex. once again, no corroboration for this just yet.

RT’S RESPONSE:

still mainly radio silence from the company, except for this tweet cancelling the days stream. replies on this post are locked almost instantly. rt also begins a quiet sweeping of all ryan and adam-centric content and videos, including a video of ryan reading “thirsty tweets” from fans, and straight up cut ryan out of certain videos (like a recent AHWU). some of these videos were archived, but we dont have a complete list of what was removed.

on the slightly less official side, r/roosterteeth issues a statement basically saying that any post attempting to discuss the leaks will be deleted immediately, and the people who post them will be reported (and likely banned).

WEEK 1, DAY 3 (october 6th):

we get our first confirmation of ryan having sexted a fan from @jasminewill123, in the form of this previously-unseen picture of ryan (it’s sfw but is clearly a cropped nude). rahul kohli again makes snide comments about adam and funhaus in general, but does not share any details of what he means. rumors spread that one of the former funhaus members, lawrence sonntag, has sent an email to his subscribers regarding adam kovic, but no evidence of that comes up yet. jess kovic posts this tweet plugging her online store, but still declines to comment on the situation. things are pretty quiet for a while, until finally, the first shoe drops.

TESSA GRAVES

at 4:13 pm, a woman named tessa graves posts this youtube video and links to it on her twitter account (with associated screenshots in the same thread). she discusses at length how she met ryan and when their relationship became sexual.

as a brief summary of her video: they met at a con in 2017, when she had just turned 17, and started talking on snapchat. the relationship was platonic for a while until tessa accidentally sent him a picture meant for a friend in which her bra strap was visible. ryan began to flirt with her after this, and soon their relationship became sexual, with nudes being exchanged and dirty texts being sent. she states in the video that ryan did not know her age, nor did he ask for it. the two of them sexted and sent nudes on and off for two years, and planned to hook up in person, but it never came to fruition.

shortly after uploading the video, she posts this screen-recording of her snap messages with ryan, scrolling back through months and months of messages between them, all the way back to late 2017. the snapchat account is confirmed to be his, and the screen-recording proves to be incredibly compelling evidence. this is the first girl to come out and say that ryan was sexual with her when she was underage, and that she did send him nudes as a minor. on her twitter account, someone noticed that ryan was online in the video and inquired about it - tessa confirms that ryan messaged her when he saw her recording their chat, but declined to share what his message said.

RYAN’S TWEET

around an hour after tessa’s video was posted, ryan posts this tweet, announcing his departure from rt. he states that he “made mistakes,” acknowledging that the pictures and screenshots were real, but specifically insists that he “did nothing illegal,” a clear comment on tessa’s accusation.

(he also asks people to stop harassing his family, but im unsure if the claim is true, as i personally have only seen people empathizing with his wife and children and no negative comments about them at all. he may be referring to people messaging his wife for comment on the situation, or he may just be straight up lying. given all hes done, the latter seems quite likely.)

people quickly begin speculating whether or not ryan was fired or quit of his own volition. personally, i believe the company offered him the option to either resign right then and there, or let them fire him publicly, and he chose the former. this is all speculation, though.

WEEK 1, DAY 4 (october 7th):

lawrence sonntag’s email to his subscribers finally gets leaked; it basically just says that hes grossed out and pissed off by what happened, and ends with the cryptic comment that “adam never washed his hands.” (he later stated that he meant this literally. EW!)

later the same day, adam privates his twitter account, and removes all references to rooster teeth and funhaus in his bio. shortly after, he unfollows everyone he was following and changes his icon and header to a black image. (basic public breakdown stuff, i suppose?)

NEW LEAK TIMELINE:

it’s discovered that an anonymous twitter user, @d74840281, had messaged ryan and adam weeks before regarding these leaks on september 18th. they also accuse ryan, adam, and several other youtube personalities - alec paul, kootra, nenreaper, and dormstreams - of “grooming the same minor.” (i dont know any of those people, but it seems relevant so i added it.)

it’s also revealed that the r/funhaus subreddit was aware of the leaks 2 weeks beforehand, meaning that the info was successfully suppressed until october 4th, and that it was likely well-known by all funhaus members and probably general rt staff, as well.

RT’S RESPONSE:

the official rt account on roosterteeth.com posts this update to their programming schedule, cancelling several rttv programs, putting both achievement hunter and funhaus on a week long break, and delaying the premiere of two new shows (”rvb zero” and “grudge night”)

not long after, they post these tweets stating that they have “parted ways” with both adam and ryan, confirming that both men are no longer rt employees. they are deliberately vague about whether the men were fired or quit, but given the responses from both, i think ryan likely chose to resign instead of be fired, and adam was probably just fired outright.

RYAN’S MODS:

you may recall that, on the second day, the question of whether the mods knew about ryan’s doings was posed. their answers were, of course, extremely vague, but one of them in particular strongly implied that the mods had dealt with some kind of accusation against ryan in the past and either ignored or actively suppressed it. well, sure enough, two of the mods (@grandaddyskulls and @ohdeerbambi/) post tweets admitting that they knew the entire time.

specifically, they state that someone came forward with accusations of ryan behaving inappropriately two years ago (2018), coupled with screenshots. the mods confronted ryan about this, and when ryan (predictably) lied about it, they decided to drop it instead of pursuing it further.

ADAM’S TWEET:

at 10:49 pm, adam finally speaks up with a post on twitter, formally stating that he is leaving funhaus. he apologizes to his coworkers and fans, but primarily apologizes to his wife, stating that he has “upturned her life.” he describes the events thus far as an “unbelievable breach of privacy and peeling back of [his] life,” and says that he is stepping away in order to focus on repairing his relationship with his wife and working on himself.

while we still have no confirmation on whether his wife consented to having those pictures and videos taken, we know with a good amount of certainty now that she did not consent to having them sent to others. this would likely qualify as revenge (or otherwise non-consensual) porn in the state of california, so if she pressed charges, adam would likely see jail time.

CAST MEMBERS REACT:

the first direct response from cast members come from michael, jeremy, and lindsay, stating their feelings of anger and betrayal, and strongly implying that none of them were aware of the goings-on. (while they definitely HAVE to say this cookie-cutter stuff for the sake of their image, i will say that theres really not much else a person can say in a situation like this while still being professional. i do tentatively believe all three of them, with the most doubt on michael.)

at this time, lawrence sonntag unfollows ryan, as do gus and lindsay. interestingly, the first person ryan unfollows himself is lindsay - this could potentially mean that lindsay actually blocked him, which forces the other person to unfollow.

WEEK 1, DAY 5 (october 8th):

at this point, discussion of adam kovic all but tapers off. he has gone full radio silent, and no one has come out with any more stories about him, so it seems very likely that his wrongdoings begin and end with the initial sexting and sending nudes of his wife. the conversation begins to turn to focus on ryan in earnest.

RYAN’S WIFE:

a reddit post (that is sadly deleted now) is uncovered from 3 months ago that reveals he and his wife have been sleeping in separate rooms for some time - we’re unsure exactly how long, but most people who’ve mentioned it have said it started in may. according to ryan, this was because his wife was exposed to covid at her job, but the quarantine period for covid is only 2 weeks - why would they be sleeping in separate rooms for so long when they clearly were not doing so before?

it is speculated that his wife may have somehow learned of ryan’s dalliances, as he was also seen without his wedding ring in streams much more often around the same time. it is unknown exactly why, though, so take this with a grain of salt.

MORE ANONYMOUS ACCUSATIONS:

a deleted user on reddit makes a post stating that they, too, sexted with ryan while they were also married. their husband found out and threatened to leak the info, but the user was able to convince him not to do so and he - according to op - deleted what proof he had. although the original post is now deleted, a pinned moderator comment on it states that the user provided proof corroborating the story in private. you can read a copy-pasted version of that story here. (apologies if it’s out of order.)

MORE CAST MEMBER COMMENTARY:

a list of all known cast member statements can be found here. it’s pretty comprehensive, but there are some i want to address here directly:

lindsay snaps at someone who tries to call her out for “not supporting her family” (meaning ryan). this, for me, is the big reason why i feel that she, at the very least, is being sincere.

blaine posts this.... weird video of him working out and captions it “me figuring out how to convert anxiety into energy.” i guess it’s supposed to be somewhat of a mood lightener, but honestly it just feels kind of trivializing to me. idk what he was thinking LMAO

aaron marquis makes this... interesting (and vague) comment. no further elaboration on it, but it’s definitely unique in comparison to many others.

meg’s statement strikes me as particularly devoid of sincerity. it may just be confirmation bias, but i just feel like it’s incredibly hollow in comparison to the others (which are also kind of hollow LMAO).

joel heyman, who was fired from rt not long ago, doesnt comment directly, but does like this tweet which calls him “the only non-degenerate connected to rt.” (OCT. 12 EDIT: he has since posted this tweet with no context, but i think it’s pretty clear what hes referring to.)

tina dayton, streamer and wife of ray, posts this tweet letting people know that mentioning the ryan/adam situation to ray in streams will not be tolerated. (OCT. 21 EDIT: she posts this tweet a few days later, on october 15th, decrying anyone who wants to play “devils advocate” in support of an abuser against their victim.)

JAN 30 EDIT: this is very late, but sometime on or before january 6th, alfredo briefly discussed the ryan haywood situation on his stream and berated those who still support him. his closing statement is the perfect summation of all of these events: fuck ryan haywood.

WEEK 1, DAY 6 (october 9th):

adam kovic deletes his twitter account, and all other public social media. this is the last piece of relevant adam kovic information for several months to come.

MICHELLE VOLOGS

at 11:26 am, a twitter user named @MichelleVologs posts this tweet, containing a link to this video, called “what you need to know about ryan haywood,” in which she asserts - with proof - that she and ryan had sex on september 23rd 2017, when she was 17 years old.

brief summary: they began talking when she was 17 and dm’d him on instagram. it was platonic at first, but he began flirting with her and trying to sext with her, at which point she inquired about the nature of his relationship with his wife. he insisted that they were in a “sexless marriage” because his wife hates sex, and that he needed to seek it out elsewhere. (we have no idea if this is even remotely true - the only source claiming this is ryan himself.) they sexted for a while, then eventually met up in california and had sex in person (and much like the story that @jasminewill123 told, ryan removed the condom in the middle of sex). when michelle told ryan that she was underage, he simply stated that it was okay and that he “trusted her.”

she shows screenshots throughout the video of their instagram dms, as well as some candid shots of ryan in their hotel room. (people have speculated that the latter two pictures may be ryan removing his wedding ring.) this picture also proves that they definitely met in person. take note of the fact that, in the dms, michelle keeps the conversation very platonic and professional - ryan is the one to initiate the sexual talk, and with zero prompting.

on top of this, michelle is also the first person to posit the idea that ryan deliberately chose to pursue young girls with mental health issues, a notion that will crop up again later.

EVEN MORE ANONYMOUS ACCUSATIONS

a reddit user by the name of “klowbie-frenzy” states that they, too, were victimized by ryan, though they dont publicly share their story or any particular info. they are encouraged to go to rt directly.

WEEK 1, DAY 7 (october 10th):

ryan begins deleting tweets, but other than that is completely radio silent. people analyzing ryan’s instagram notice this post, made on september 24th 2017 - the day after he and michelle had sex. sure enough, he is still in LA as he was the day before, and michelle herself comments on the post in a clear reference to the events of the day before, reasserting that she is telling the truth.

LEIGH:

yet another girl, leigh, comes forward and says she was sexually involved with ryan. she posts this (very long) document to her twitter account @leigh__sucks, which details the entirety of her relationship with ryan. unlike tessa and michelle, leigh was over 18 during the course of her experience with ryan (she was 20 when they first started talking).

brief summary of the document: she started messaging ryan on snapchat in 2017, and it remained platonic until february 2018, when they exchanged nudes for the first time. they sexted for a while, until hooking up for the first time at rtx 2018. leigh told someone she knew about the encounter, and this person began harassing leigh and ryan about it, threatening to tell his wife and leaving nasty comments on ryan’s stream. eventually the person backed off, and ryan and leigh continued sexting and meeting up for sex, on and off. according to her, they sexted as recently as september 2020.

this story is MUCH different than tessa’s and michelle’s, as leigh was still engaging with ryan fairly actively until only a month ago, and had a different perspective as an adult than the two underaged girls would have had. still, she is absolutely correct that ryan held a similar power over her due to his celebrity status, and that he took advantage of this.

she also provides screenshots and pictures of the two of them in the thread. although it is all VERY convincing - as if everything else hes done wasnt enough - theres something particularly unique in her thread, which is these screenshots of payments sent to her by ryan, under the name “sorta malicious gaming.” why is ryan sending leigh money under this name relevant? well...

RYAN’S DONATIONS:

one of ryan’s mods reveals that the email ryan used to send this money was connected to his stream. according to ryan, the money he received from twitch donations and bits went to his children’s college funds, or any necessary big-ticket expenditures like home repairs - however, as we can see here, that was a complete lie. this means that all donations he received, which he claimed went to taking care of himself and his family, were actually being spent on gifts and plane tickets for the girls he was hooking up with. im not sure if he could get into any legal trouble here - im doubtful, since they are donations - but this is just another way he took advantage of his fans, only this time is financial instead of sexual. and speaking of taking advantage of fans...

RYAN “VENTS” TO LEIGH:

shortly after posting her document, leigh added an update to say that ryan had redownloaded snapchat and that she’d immediately began taking screenshots. surprisingly, ryan messaged her and asked if she’d speak with him. leigh agreed (for the purpose of getting more screenshots, according to her), and ryan began talking about how his marriage and career were over, how he never meant to victimize anyone, and that the girls coming out would rather “make him the bad guy” than accept that theyd slept with him willingly.

leigh mentions that it occurred to her how ryan would always cast doubt on any rumors by claiming that whatever girl hed been involved with was “crazy,” and notes that he did the same to her, all while calling her his “friend.” this will be relevant again later.

ryan goes on to point the finger at leigh specifically, saying that he ‌“still‌ ‌didn’t‌ ‌know‌ ‌if‌ ‌[she] ‌was‌ ‌going‌ ‌to‌ ‌add‌ ‌to‌ ‌the‌ ‌fire‌ ‌at‌ ‌this‌ ‌point,”‌ ‌and‌ ‌how‌ ‌he‌ ‌“hoped‌ ‌[she wouldn’t]‌ ‌for‌ ‌his‌ ‌kids’‌ ‌sake.” all the while, leigh notes that he was deleting messages, proving to her that ryan was more fixated on his image and manipulating her into doing what HE wanted, rather than doing the right thing. here are screenshots of the conversation between leigh and ryan, and here are some clearer photos (as some are a bit blurry due to being taken on another phone).

WEEK 2, DAY 1 (october 11th):

this day is mostly quiet as people attempt to digest the absurd influx of information from the days prior, as well as the huge bombshell dropped by leigh in particular.

RYAN’S DISCORD SERVER:

it’s discovered that ryan likely found out about the leaks very early on (either the very first day, or the day of tessa’s accusation), because he was noted as being online in his discord server, which he apparently rarely used.

the users in his discord server immediately disown him upon learning of his preying on minors, and assert that the server is now a general server instead of a ryan haywood server.

YOU GUESSED IT - MORE ANONYMOUS ACCUSATIONS:

this tweet thread is made by @trickstress_ stating that, while working with “the madhouse” (not exactly sure what this is, but it seems like some kind of ryan-themed community server), they attempted to get ryan to address a situation occurring behind the scenes in which someone was being bullied and harassed by other members. when ryan is sent five pages of screenshots and evidence, he basically says that screenshots are not proof and that the victim simply “wanted” to be offended. this caused trick and a few others to leave the madhouse.

in the same screenshot, he mentions a situation involving another certain user that he is dealing with (the name of the person in question is redacted in blue), and trick speculates that the person in blue may be another one of ryan’s victims.

meanwhile, twitter user @eacalpreon (whose account appears to be deleted) states that they uncovered this tumblr post from august 25th, 2019, about someone who spotted ryan at an austin hotel they used to work at, entering a hotel room booked by someone that was certainly NOT his wife. at the time of posting, this was simply brushed off as speculation and ignored.

KAYLA:

at 10:03 am, this tweet is posted by @HADERSRICHIE/, detailing yet another story of their encounters with ryan. unlike other stories, kayla unfortunately does not have any screenshot evidence due to losing it all after unfriending ryan from snapchat in 2018 - but in all honesty, at this point we know hes guilty, so that part is not as relevant.

brief summary of the document: the two began talking on snapchat in february 2017, but they didnt begin talking regularly until june 2017, after kayla had moved to austin (for non-related reasons). kayla reveals that she is the user from trick’s tweet thread that was bullied out of the madhouse, and that ryan was not only unhelpful, but was actively telling people that she was a “crazy psycho.” she also backs up the idea that ryan seemed to deliberately target girls with mental health issues. in late 2017/early 2018, the two “make up” and ryan initiates sexual talk. within the first day of flirting, ryan sends kayla a dick pic. the two sexted for a while, and eventually did hook up in person. they hooked up 3 times in total before kayla unfriended ryan on snapchat and ceased all communication with him.

unlike other cases, kayla was of age (23/24) when this all went down. later on, trick confirms on reddit that kayla was indeed the person from her tweet thread whose name was censored in blue.

DOT:

at 3:37 pm, this tweet thread is posted by @alijdotroro stating that she was also involved with ryan for a few months. her thread is fairly short, and she states that they never had sex in person or anything to the same extent as some of the others - he flirted with her for the first time while she was at a concert, it continued for several months, then he got bored and stopped it. dot was unable to provide screenshots as she had deleted her snapchat.

JACK’S STATEMENT:

jack pattillo posts this tweet at 8:16 pm, containing this document regarding the ryan (and adam) situation. he first addresses his feelings of anger, betrayal, and guilt, stating that he feels somewhat responsible as he helped to create the same platform that ryan abused. he goes on to thank everyone who has had kind words for him and the other rt staff, and states that while he knows everyone handles rough situations differently, he hopes that people can understand his desire to think positively. he goes on to say that he knows it will be difficult for fans to trust rt going forward, but that he hopes they will give rt another chance and that they (rt) “will be better - [they] have to be.”

as far as all of the statements go, in my opinion, this one is the most sincere of all (although lindsay’s is definitely the most sincere for me) - jack clearly wrote this himself instead of using standard “shocked” quotes as many of the other rt cast did, and while it is definitely very damage control-y, i can easily tell that he, at the very least, is taking the matter seriously. this doesnt necessarily mean that jack 100% didnt know, but at this point i am inclined to believe that he didnt.

WEEK 2, DAY 2 (october 12th):

twitter user @fantaisieally discusses her own experiences with ryan haywood; they chatted on snapchat starting in 2017, she would often go to him for dating advice, and while ryan finally tried to hit on her, he got completely deaded when she told him that he was “like her older brother.” honestly this one is just really funny to me, like she completely curved his ass and he had to flounder talking about “i was JOKING lol just a joke!” it’s pretty glorious after all this terrible shit.

someone on reddit notes that after ally turns him down, ryan doesnt apologize or anything, but instead continues the “joke” in such a way that prompts her to accept his offer while still giving him plausible deniability. (that phrase is going to come up quite a bit with regard to his overall “strategy.”)

KATIE B:

at 9:08 am, twitter user @frizzical/ posts this tweet thread, documenting her own relationship with ryan. she states that, while their relationship thankfully never turned sexual, ryan absolutely attempted to groom her into sex and even mentioned her to another girl, saying he wanted a threesome with both of them.

brief summary of the document: katie started watching his streams when she was 17, and ryan knew her by name very quickly. they started talking on snapchat shortly after she turned 18, and although it was generally rt-related, one day she reached out asking for advice on a personal situation that ryan was incredibly helpful with, leading to them talking semi-regularly. they talked about katie’s abusive home life and mental health issues, and while things were mostly platonic, ryan would sometimes drop inappropriate questions in, such as if katie was a virgin and what her sexuality was. when katie hit hard financial times, ryan attempted multiple times to send her money, and when katie refused to take charity, he would make a “joke” about having her pay it off with sex.

eventually ryan forced her to accept the money, stating that he would no longer speak to her if she didnt. ryan was katie’s main support system, and so she felt she had no choice but to accept it. she states that he sent her $1000 in total, all of which came from his twitch’s paypal. he also actively tried to turn katie against her best friend - kayla, who was the other victim mentioned on week 2, day 1 (october 11th) - by telling her that kayla was crazy, but this did not work. in 2019, katie moved in with ryan’s mod bambi, and ryan very suddenly cut off contact completely. ryan and katie got back in contact as recently as earlier this week, and when she began taking screenshots of their snap conversations, ryan dm’d her on twitter to confront her about it, further trying to manipulate her. she ends with a message of support for the other girls.

the messages ryan sent katie are viewable in the thread, but i would like to link them directly here to show how he manipulates victims. notice how he once again pins the blame on the victim for taking screenshots, instead of himself for being a fucking creep.

RT’S RESPONSE:

they’ve been pretty quiet the last few days, but someone noticed that the off topic podcast episode #177 has been removed from iOS podcasts. this episode is the one where the guys discuss ryan’s habit of leaving business trips a day late. i find it extremely interesting that the company is claiming ignorance of the situation, yet would remove this VERY key piece of information in the process.

OFF TOPIC #177

i originally just had this as a bulletpoint in the miscellanous info section, but decided to move it to its own segment because it is actually quite significant to this story. in this video, michael, jeremy, gavin, ray, geoff, and andy blanchard discuss ryan’s habit of always leaving business trips a day late.

quick description: michael brings up a conversation he had with ryan about staying an extra day on business trips, and paraphrases ryan as saying that he prefers to stay away longer because “[his wife] isnt gonna watch [the kids], im not gonna get a fucking second at home.” michael then states that theyve “gotten to the bottom of this,” that ryan just wants to sleep before “going home to that nightmare.”

as michael is talking, geoff and jeremy both go quiet and look very pensive and glassy-eyed, while ray tries to joke that the quote was a “cry for help from ryan” but immediately frowns after saying so. gavin, jeremy, and andy are completely quiet for the entire second half of the video. michael tries to paper over it by saying that ryan loves his kids very much as evidenced by their frequent appearances in his streams, but a visibly-uncomfortable ray makes another “joke” that having his kids appear in his videos is “easy money.”

then there is a VERY awkward silence in which everyone looks super uncomfortable, jeremy takes a massive gulp of his drink, ray has his hand over his mouth as he stares hard at michael and shakes his head repeatedly (as if telling him to stop talking), and geoff lets out a HUGE sigh, as if he’s just realized something terrible. michael ends the clip with the comment that they didnt “jack” ryan, meaning that they werent making fun of ryan to have him come on the podcast and defend himself. (OCT. 12 EDIT: thanks to @juggey for clarifying this!) although it’s not included in this short clip, the full podcast shows that the incredibly tense moment is cut by fiona nova immediately walking on set with a puppy out of nowhere. very fucking weird.

while it is largely circumstantial, i find this clip is extremely telling, and i think this is the moment where they realized that something was going on with ryan’s homelife (either they recognized that the real reason he wanted to stay behind was to cheat, or they’d simply put together that he was not happy at home for whatever reason). the fact that this off topic is one of the only ones to have been taken down also really strikes me as important.

ALISON

at 2:31 pm, twitter user @adothop posted some screenshots of conversations between herself and ryan. they did not have a sexual relationship, but looks like ryan tried hard (and failed hard LMAO) at flirting with her, to no avail. not much else to say about this one - it’s pretty straightforward.

RYAN’S STATEMENT

at 7:48 pm (around the same time i uploaded this post, lmao), ryan posted this statement on his twitter account, discussing the events of this past week. he takes full accountability for his actions, stating that he abused his position and crossed the line as a public figure, while also asking that people stop harassing his family. the statement’s about as cookie cutter as it can get - after all, what can a person really say to absolve themselves after being outed as doing so much horrid stuff?

i again am skeptical of the claim that his family is being harassed, though i dont doubt that people are harassing HIM directly, but in any case it’s as much of a non-apology as one might expect. he even tries to shift blame by saying he “always came from a place of what [he] thought was a shared connection.” it’s boilerplate bullshit, as usual.

ANOTHER RH STORY ANON

sometime around 9 pm, a reddit user going by r/anotherrhstoryanon (i will call them anon for short) put this post on the r/roosterteeth subreddit, and linked to a 30 page google doc detailing their relationship with ryan. the timeline of this one is very difficult to parse, but i will do my best to lay it out clearly. particular tw for this story - it describes in detail sexual abuse, physical abuse, and features ddlg heavily throughout. i will not be linking any images directly - please view the doc for those.

(not-so)-brief summary: im not certain of when ryan and anon originally started talking, but the earliest message shown in their conversation is from december 2016, and the first time they met up in person was april 2017. they were “together” for at least a year, as anon states that it took them until march 2018 to begin distancing themselves from ryan. their relationship was HEAVILY steeped in dd/lg culture - ryan almost solely referred to anon as names like “little girl,” “baby girl,” even calls them “kiddo” in the VERY FIRST SCREENSHOT and asks if theyve ever been with an older man. given that he already dipped below the age of consent twice (that we know of - we currently do not know the age of this anon), this is a very horrifying start.

anon admits pretty early on - to both ryan (in the screenshots) and the reader - that they were very intimidated by him, and felt a sort of compulsion to do as he ordered. but as they say quite clearly, they realized soon into their “relationship” that even though they wanted to please ryan so he’d like them, they hated having sex with him, hated BEING sexual with him, and just generally hated being with him. although they enjoyed sex the first time, they note that sex with ryan was rough and painful every time after, leading to them tearing more than once and bleeding EVERY time, and sometimes causing them to be unable to sit or walk after.

ryan not only ignored anon every time they asked him to be more gentle, but seemed to get off on it, making comments about how they “needed more abuse” or that they “had to work up to it.” on top of all this, ryan would not wear a condom while having sex with anon, and lied to them about them being the only fan he was having sex with - which they believed until august 2020, more than two years later, when ryan said there was “one other fan.” in actuality, ryan had been sleeping with multiple girls and often removing the condom during sex, a fact well-documented here.

anon ends the document by tying their story to several other known facts, to show the pattern of ryan’s behavior, and sharing some other pertinent info. some of these include:

- a picture of them taken in a hotel room mirror, in an identical room and position to the picture leigh took.

- this video, at timestamp 8:27, of the off topic podcast #87. in this short moment, ryan idly licks a cupcake. anon shows a screenshot in which ryan messaged her and admitted that he was thinking about her while he was licking it.

- screenshots of ryan attempting (again with limited success) to give anon money or buy them presents. anon was resistant to this, as katie had been, but ryan managed to convince them to accept a remote controlled sex toy. later in the same exchange, he uses the term “plausible deniability” again. there is a reason this keeps cropping up - he very likely used the phrase often.

- a screenshot of anon telling ryan point blank that the power dynamic between them was imbalanced. this message is dated may 23rd, 2020 - and around june 12th, 2020 was leigh’s exchange with ryan, in which he tells leigh that he is older and “some kind of quasi-internet person,” and is worried this will influence her.

- screenshots of ryan admitting to choking anon without their permission. according to anon, this was not the first time he did something to them without permission, and it wasnt even the non-consensual act anon was referring to when they brought it up. i sincerely cannot overstate my fucking disgust here.

there is a lot more i can get into here, but im going to cut it off here for the sake of brevity (and out of disgust, honestly). please consider reading all 30 pages, if you can stomach it - it truly is even worse than it sounds. theres a reason i didnt link to any of their messages directly.

WEEK 2, DAY 3 (october 13th):

sometime earlier in the week (im not sure when, as the “adam kovic” aspect of the story has been pretty much lost the plot), jess kovic deletes her twitter account. the reason why is pretty easy to guess. then, sometime today, it’s discovered that she has also deleted all posts containing pictures of adam on her instagram account.

(JAN 30 EDIT: this was originally an archive link which showed all of the most recent posts on jess’s insta, of which quite a few adam ones had been deleted [i saw it myself the day it was posted]. unfortunately, it appears the archive was taken down, so ive replaced the original link with a screenshot from kiwifarms of the first person to mention it on the thread. i know thats not amazing proof, but sadly its the best i can do.)

this all but confirms that jess did not consent to having those pictures/videos sent to other people, if she consented to having them taken at all, and this makes adams actions even more disgusting than we initially believed them to be.

RH ANON PT. 2:

people are still reeling from the absolutely horrendous document released the day before (oct. 12) when anon posts a short update on the very last page of the doc, which you can read here. they clear up some points that people were confused on; most are not relevant for our purposes, but the biggest one is that anon confirms they were NOT underage during their “relationship” with ryan and that he knew this.

anon also confirms that ryan deliberately lied about the circumstances of their “relationship” in order to keep them from backing out of it, as he knew they would not want to proceed with a sexual relationship if he admitted the truth. based on context, i am taking this to mean that he lied about not sleeping with anyone else, and about wearing condoms if he did.

MEGASHINY:

at 3:04 pm, ryan’s mod meg (who i will be calling by her username, megashiny, for the sake of clarity) posts this tweet, which contains a link to this document. in this document, she admits that ryan took advantage of his position over her (as, being his mod, she was basically his employee) and started sending her nudes without consent in september 2017 (she says it was a sunday, so either the 6th, 13th, 20th, or 27th - notice the proximity to his encounters with michelle and tessa).

brief summary: he played the same card he had with the others, talking about his sexless marriage, and convinced megashiny to sleep with him. when she asked him point blank how many other girls he was involved with, he lied and said only one or two - as we clearly note, there were many, many more than that. she did not want to sleep with him, but like anon from yesterday, felt compelled to do what he asked. even when megashiny tried to say no to a sex act he wanted to do, he told her he “knew how to make her say yes.” he also knew about her having adhd and anxiety, and in conjunction with the other girls, strikes me as yet another continuation of his pattern of targeting mentally ill and neurodivergent women and girls.

while megashiny was somewhat close in age to ryan (she was 28 at the time), if youll notice in her picture, she is quite thin and small in stature - both of which contribute to her looking pretty young. while i do believe ryan knew her age, it would not surprise me if he pursued her because she had the APPEARANCE of being in her late teens.

megashiny posts an update later the same day, detailing the exact method weve seen happen with the other girls before - ryan would “throw all this attention and praise at [them], make [them] feel special,” only to “basically ghost [them].” this left the girls feeling like theyd done something wrong, but in actuality, it was all part of his plan to keep them dependent on and obedient to him. these same patterns crop up in every story, no matter the variables.

she also admits that she essentially helped ryan with his “sexcapades” by either covering for him, encouraging the girls to sleep with him, or just generally keeping her mouth shut regarding what she knew about them. (this part is very vaguely described, so i can only surmise what she means specifically, but i do think this is essentially what she is saying.) shortly after she posted this, ryan called her and begged her for over an hour to not divulge anymore information, and to “think of his wife and kids.”

RYAN BEGINS MESSAGING VICTIMS:

at 7:04 pm, michelle posts this tweet, with the caption “how it started vs how it ended (hopefully, and please stop harassing me)” and two pictures. the first picture is of her first exchange with ryan on instagram; the second picture is a more recent message from ryan (not sure exactly what day it was received, but as it still shows his old icon, it is definitely a few days old), begging her to take down her video and tweets and to “think about his kids.” (brief tw for suicide mention in the next two paragraphs.)

he even goes so far as to strongly imply that he is going to kill himself, telling michelle that he is “going to die” and that “he will die for this if you [michelle] want.” from the statement michelle made, it seems likely that he has sent her similar messages over the course of the last week. michelle must have blocked him on his original account, because he then made this throwaway account and dm’d her again, repeating the same sort of rhetoric and begging her to remove her statements “for his kids.”

in the same tweet thread, another victim, ileena (who was shown accusing ryan very early on in a previous screenshot) posts an old screenshot of a conversation between her and ryan, in which she is actively suicidal and ryan begs her not to kill herself because “practically there’s no way they wouldnt investigate and figure out you and i had stuff going on.” he straight up tells her that he doesnt want her to die because their affair will be discovered.

(note: ileena’s original screenshot contains a full, unblocked number that could potentially belong to ryan - but DO NOT CONTACT THIS NUMBER. he is a disgusting monster, but it is not anyone’s place to needlessly antagonize him, and we dont even know that that is his actual number to begin with. i am only putting this disclaimer because the screenshot is easily viewable in the thread; i wouldnt even mention it otherwise.)

CAS:

not long after midnight, @slayercas/ (who i will refer to as “cas” for short) posts this cryptic tweet, strongly hinting at needing to say something important, but being scared to do so due to a lack of evidence - the surrounding tweets are all about ryan haywood, making it highly likely they are alluding to having been one of his victims. approximately 4 hours later, they received this message from a throwaway account, ostensibly owned by ryan.

notably, though, is the fact that this is NOT the same throwaway account which ryan was messaging michelle from - the account michelle was messaged from is @pleaseR73880233, while the account cas was messaged from, although the name is partially obscured, ends with the number “7384736.” no confirmation on cas’s claim, nor whether the account is truly ryan’s.

(OCT. 14 EDIT: the full name seems to be @pleaseR27384736, which originally led to this cryptically bereft page. note the join date, amount of tweets, and amount of followers - the account was in use for quite some time, and may have had a different username before messaging cas. someone also takes note of the fact that there was an intern named “amber” who worked at rooster teeth years ago, but so far no connection has been made between the name and anyone else.

sadly, this account has since been deleted, so no proper analysis of who it is following and who follows it can be done. the username has since been taken and the account replaced with this - take their personal opinion with a grain of salt.)

MJ:

at 9:21 am, twitter user @mjmills_ posts these tweets containing these screenshots of a recent conversation with ryan. although she declines to share her story right then, she notes that ryan has been taking screenshots of their old conversations, a statement which causes ryan to message her asking “where [she is] on the hate meter” and once again trying to manipulate her. although nothing is forthcoming right away, this will pop up again later.

WEEK 2, DAY 4 (october 14th):

rt’s community manager, jackie izawa, announces her departure from the company. i cant even imagine how much shit she was inundated with after this news broke, but given that she explicitly mentions her mental health being a factor in her decision, im willing to bet it was a lot.

joel heyman also posts this incredibly eyebrow-raising tweet, clearly accusing rt staff of having known full well about ryan’s actions ahead of time. given that he was fired not long ago, it is entirely possible that he is just stirring the pot - but as he is a former rt founder, there may be some truth to his claim. if it IS true, however, then it reflects just as poorly on him, as it means that he ALSO knew about ryan and did nothing.

RYAN’S SOCIAL MEDIA:

sometime in the morning (before 11 am), ryan deletes his twitter account and his instagram. the throwaway account that was used to message michelle is also deleted around the same time, making it highly likely that it did indeed belong to ryan.

interestingly, the account that messaged cas is not deleted until much later (somewhere around 1:30-2 pm), and not before sending some more harassing messages. note the final message which says that “[his] family can’t handle another story coming out.” this strongly implies that there are even more girls than we’ve already seen - and counting every single accusation we know of, not just confirmed ones, we’ve already gotten somewhere between 10-15 girls.

CAS PT. 2:

after some more messages from the potential ryan account, cas posts this follow-up tweet to clarify some points. she states clearly that she was NOT underage, and lives local to austin, which would explain both her fears about speaking out and how she could have encountered ryan.

JACK AND MICHAEL:

in the early afternoon, jack and michael go live on youtube to do a stream together - but first, the monumental task of discussing ryan. (OCT. 14 EDIT: the original video was privated almost immediately after its conclusion; here is a reupload. it is sadly missing quite a few moments due to the site crashing periodically, but the majority of their conversation is there.)

some key bits from the conversation:

- the first minute or so, both jack and michael have difficulty speaking, and stutter/stop short quite a bit before jack finally begins to talk in earnest. jack expresses disgust and regret immediately, apologizing to the community for “letting [them] down,” and thanks people who have been supportive to the victims and rt staff.

- michael point blank states that the achievement hunter staff - and probably more, also - were put into “counseling.” he does not specify whether he means LEGAL counseling or EMOTIONAL counseling, but given the way both he and jack act throughout the video, im all but certain that it’s the latter.

- jack asks that people not bother geoff, as he is “going through his own stuff,” and strongly implies that the situation with ryan has thrown him for a massive loop and possibly sent him into a downward spiral.

- michael states that they will NOT be discussing ryan at all during off-topic, and notes that they no longer want to even mention his name, let alone spend time talking about him at length (and, indeed, they do not address him by name in the video even once - jack mainly refers to him as “that guy” or “that monster,” while michael only refers to ryan as “he” or “him”). i personally am in pretty strong disagreement with the way theyve chosen to approach this, but i can understand the reasoning behind it.

- jack announces the return of rt extra life, and states that they will be doing a full week of 12 hour streams instead of one 24 hour stream “to make up for all the shit that happened this year.”

- this is a small moment, and COMPLETE conjecture on my part, but i noticed it pretty quickly; at timestamp 14:15, when michael’s child cries off-screen, he slightly turns toward that direction, then seems to suddenly get upset and turns his face away from the camera, so his hair and hat obscure most of his profile. he seems to take a hard swallow, bites his lip (which is quivering), and rubs his face hard before turning back toward the camera. all of these things in conjunction make it seem that he was biting back tears, or otherwise chasing away some bad thought (possibly about ryan’s kids?).

while i, as always, remain skeptical that no one knew about ryan, i do have to admit that this video is extremely saddening to watch. jack is audibly on the verge of tears for the entire 20-minute video, and michael looks absolutely miserable from beginning to end, as well - his hair is visibly unkempt under his hat, and his face is contorted into a grimace pretty much the whole time, all of which speaks to a sincere depressive state. in any case, rt as a whole has been well and truly fucked by this series of events.

SURVIVORS OF RYAN PT. 1:

earlier in the day, the twitter account @survivorsofryan (run by katie) received these dms from an anonymous account, stating that they were involved with ryan many years ago, around 2004/2005, and that he was still dating his girlfriend (now wife) at that time. they conclude that he has been cheating on her since at least 2004, possibly even earlier than that. note that this anonymous person also fits into ryan’s “preferred” age range of 18 or just over 18, while ryan was in his mid 20s at the time.

RYAN’S MODS 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO:

all of ryan’s mods (katie, bambi, freckles, and more) have their mod powers removed from his youtube and twitch channels. freckles posits an excellent question - why would he remove their mod powers instead of just simply deleting both accounts?

there arent many answers i can think of other than the obvious one - that ryan sincerely plans to return to his online career once this “blows over.” his entitlement is absolutely unthinkable.

ASTRID ROSE:

at 7:01 pm, twitter user @astridrose_20 posts this tweet containing this document, detailing her relationship with ryan. (tw for sexual abuse.)

summary: their first contact was in late 2018, when astrid was 18. she reached out to him to thank him for his positive content and mentioned her mental health struggle and abusive home life, and ryan responded in a kind way and comforted her. they had a friendly, platonic relationship for a short while, but he soon became suggestive. initially, astrid shut down his advances due to viewing him as a father figure, but was scared that he would sever contact should she not acquiesce. feeling indebted to him for his kindness, astrid rose eventually accepted his advances.

they sexted for some time until meeting in person in 2019. astrid told ryan she was a virgin and was not on birth control, but ryan assured her he would wear a condom. ryan was, as many girls before have mentioned, very rough and gave her no time to adjust, and removed the condom halfway through sex in spite of astrid telling him she did not want him to. much like the r/roosterteeth anon mentioned, ryan was very rough, and astrid could hardly walk after.

they met up 10 more times after this, and every meeting eventually went this way - astrid could not take pill-form bc due to it making her feel unwell, so every time ryan would promise to wear a condom, and every time he would remove it in the middle of sex. astrid also states that, like the r/roosterteeth anon, ryan did things “similar” to the choking he did to that anon, but astrid did not want to specify any more than this.

eventually, as a result of her trauma, astrid began binge eating and gained weight. ryan apparently lost interest in her due to this and cut all contact with her, at which point she deleted all their messages and other forms of contact.

although the story does not have any corroborating evidence, this lines up extremely well with what we have already learned about ryan, and i cant really find myself doubting any bit of it, as it all seems to fit very clearly into the picture.

KRISTEN M/TATS:

at 8:21 pm, a community member by the name of kristen (nicknamed tats by the community - i will be referring to her as “tats”) posts this tweet containing yet another story about ryan. the story is thankfully not as horrific as some of the others, but is elucidating nonetheless.

brief summary: tats first reached out to ryan in 2013, as she had just founded the blog “fuckyeahrtfanfic” (which is exactly what it sounds like) and wanted to do a q&a with some rt cast members. ryan agreed, and after the q&a she and ryan both kept up contact. tats notes that, while ryan definitely started their relationship off similarly to that of the other girls (being kind and sweet, helping them with emotional problems, sending gifts and other such things, then progressing to sexually suggestive comments and “jokes”), things did not go the same way for her.

simply put, tats did not indulge ryan at all in the sexual stuff very much, and would either brush past it or not notice it. she notes that, after a while - primarily when the other girls, like his twitch mods, came into the picture - their interactions became shorter, more business-like, and much more rare. she concludes by wondering if there was anything she could have done had she been more knowledgeable about what was going on.

while the story is not an allegation in itself, it is indeed telling about ryan’s process, as it shows clearly what happens if the girls he spoke to didnt meet his “standards.” tats does seem grateful to have been spared a much worse fate, but she notes that big parts of her life that were populated by interactions with ryan have now been sullied, and that she feels a tremendous amount of guilt for what little involvement she had in pushing girls toward ryan (as she states that some of the people who’ve come forward were people she knew and unintentionally “placed in harm’s way”). his selfish behavior has had a massive impact that extends far beyond himself and his victims, and it’s horrific to think about.

WEEK 2, DAY 5 (october 15th):

this day was pretty uneventful, overall: only one major breakthrough that i could see.

MJ PT. 2:

at 10:46 am, MJ posts this tweet containing this google doc detailing her relationship with ryan. her story is quite different, as she is currently (as of october 15th) the only girl to have been in ryan’s age range (she was 30 at the time, ryan was 38), and was also married at the time of their relationship.

brief summary: she and ryan began talking around november 2018, and although she was married, both she and her husband were interested in pursuing a polyamorous relationship/open marriage (im not clear on exactly which, as mj uses the term “polyam,” but what she describes sounds closer to an open marriage which allows for no-strings sex outside of the relationship). mj vented to ryan about her anxieties with pursuing this kind of marriage, and ryan talked her through it and vented about his own marital troubles. they began to flirt in earnest.

in december 2018, mj approached ryan about rumors she had heard of other girls, which ryan of course denied. mj found out later that month that there were indeed others. in january 2019, ryan offered to fly her out to austin for a hook-up (using the money from his twitch account, of course). with her husbands approval, mj went in february, and they spent a while together - but when she returned home, ryan immediately ghosted her, and did not talk to her for a few weeks after. mj notes how disgusted and used she felt after the fact, but something still drew her to him, and they continued to have an on-off “relationship” until as recently as this year, where she notes that their conversations slowed basically to a halt. she ends the doc with an apology to everyone who was hurt by ryan.

at this point, the stories are likely going to be much more of the same, as it’s clear that ryan had a predetermined system for how he’d approach these hook-ups, so i expect many more stories along these lines in the coming days.

WEEK 2, DAY 6 (october 16th):

@slayercas/ abandons her twitter account due to continual harassment from yet another “pleaseread” account. do note that this is NOT the same account as before, since that one was deleted and then repurposed - this new one is completely barren, with only two (inexplicable) followers and no tweets or content to speak of. i am hesitant to believe that this is truly ryan, as the message really doesnt sound like something he would send at this point in time - however, i dont believe cas has faked this either (after all, why would she abandon the account if she was faking messages from ryan “for attention”?).

my outstanding theory is that someone completely unrelated has made up the account to mess with cas, as we know for sure that at least one person disbelieved cas enough to take the name of the previous account and say so in their description. on top of that, the fact that some of the numbers included are “911″ - making me think 9/11 - and “88401″ - making me think someone tried to slip in a “1488″ reference, but didnt want it to be obvious - have me skeptical that this is a real ryan throwaway. again, this is complete conjecture; please take it with a grain of salt.

SURVIVORS OF RYAN PT. 2:

at 10:25 am, @survivorsofryan posts this tweet containing this document from an anonymous person. (i will refer to them as UK anon, since that is where they are from.)

brief summary: UK anon starts off by saying that, while they did not sleep with ryan themselves, they know someone who has and is going to allow them to speak out for themselves. moving to themselves, they first spoke to ryan in march 2017, and sent him the usual “thank you for your content” message on his snapchat. they were in a discord group for RT, and apparently a few of them decided to send ryan suggestive pictures, which started off a few sexting relationships between them and him. according to UK anon, one of the discord members flew out - on their own dime - to sleep with him, while others had been sexting with him for a long time and were even still doing so recently.

UK anon did meet ryan at rtx london in 2018, and was even brought on stage and sat next to him by lawrence sonntag (from funhaus) - she states that she’s fairly certain he recognized her, as he made it a point to be very physically close to her and to touch her quite a bit. she notes that, before this, she and many other girls had long since cut contact with him, and he’d promised he would stop the cheating and sexting with fans (which we, of course, know was a complete lie). she ends by saying that they thought they knew the truth about ryan, that he was simply a liar and cheater, but in actuality he was a sexual predator who’d been manipulating girls all along, and that this has floored her and her friends.

ON THE SPOT #80

as with off topic #177, i was going to put this in miscellaneous, but it is actually a huge moment in the context of this story. someone uncovers this moment from on the spot episode 80 (timestamp is 29:40 if the link doesnt work), in which burnie, barbara, jeremy, and ryan are playing “never have i ever,” and jon puts forth the prompt “never have i ever sent nude pics.” ryan takes a big swig, as does jeremy, and jon presses it by asking both of them if the nudes were sent to “someone other than [their wives].” ryan states that hes “not having this conversation” and that he had a life before he was married, to which barbara “jokingly” responds, “and after!”

burnie, however, looks a bit perturbed and says, “you had a life before your wife before camera phones?” to which ryan responds, “email existed back then, and camera phones.” that seems to cover it, you would think, EXCEPT that ryan is telling an out and out lie.

firstly, as we clearly know, he was sexting many more people than his wife, and quite recently. it was stupid of him to not just lie and say no, honestly, but i think weve come to realize ryan is not that bright. secondly, while ryan got married in 2007, he was dating his wife for a few years before that, as this anonymous contributor confirmed days ago - he was already dating his wife in 2004, when he had an affair with the anon.

third, he is correct that camera phones and email existed back then - however, the average phone at that time did NOT have a camera, and the ones that did capped at 1.3 megapixels, which tended to look something like this. (forgive the random picture; its all i could find to show what i meant.) note how grainy and small the image is, and also take into consideration that this would have been the camera on a top-of-the-line phone in 2004, NOT the sort of phone the average person would have owned. this is assuming 2004 is the latest year he could have sent such pictures to someone without being in a relationship with his wife; camera phones were almost unheard of pre-2003, so his story completely falls apart there.

he does have a point about the email aspect, but if we are sincerely considering that he may not be lying here, this would mean that he was finding people online to send nudes to (in a VERY pre-social media world; this wouldve been on like, bbs sites, or miscellaneous blogs/homepages, so it wouldve required some serious searching), taking nudes on a digital camera, manually uploading all the pictures to his computer, sorting out the nudes of choice, and then sending them. i dont think i need to go much further into this to show how quickly the basic concept of this falls apart.

WEEK 2, DAY 7 (october 17th):

not much to say in terms of ryan/his victims so far today, but i think this is relevant, so im going to include it - we instead get a surprise tweet from trevor collins, who was previously accused of cheating on and abusing his ex gf, which contains this statement basically refuting the claims entirely with many screenshots.

i know absolutely nothing about the original trevor accusation, as i was no longer watching rt when trevor joined the crew and had long since lost interest in rt by the time the accusations began going around, so i cannot speak to the veracity of anything said in here, or of the original accusation. i will decline to state my personal opinion on the document, and instead just link it for you all to peruse.

CAS PT. 2:

at 7:48 pm, @slayercas/ (OCT. 21 EDIT: the account name is now @otpineedyou) posts this tweet containing a document, describing their own story with ryan.

brief summary: cas informs us out the gate that she was NOT underage, but rather in her late 20s during all this. she reached out to him to thank him for his content, to which ryan responded in a flirtatious way. things quickly escalated to full on sexting from there. when ryan asked if cas wanted to meet in person, she initially declined, but continued talking to him sexually after he confessed to having an open marriage (and cas notes that he did not say this until after she stated that she was in an open relationship herself). cas shared a story regarding a sexual trauma she had with ryan, which he seemed to empathize with.

once they began talking about dom/sub stuff, ryan got more aggressive in tone, and often brought up things like extreme roughness and choking. if cas asked ryan to stop bringing up things that were traumatic, he would apologize but continue to do so anyway. cas became uncomfortable and decided to forgo all sexual conversations with ryan; if he brought up something suggestive, she would either make an excuse to go or change the subject. he tried to guilt trip her into talking to him, but she did not budge, and eventually had to delete all rt-related accounts to put distance between him and herself. she closes with a message of positivity for others in the same situation.

ANON-2:

around 10 pm, this post is made on r/roosterteeth containing this document. although it is also about ryan, a sizable portion of the doc focuses on the anon’s experience with geoff. (i will be calling them anon-2 just for the sake of intelligiblity. i cant link pictures, so please check the doc for those.)

brief summary: anon-2 was in their early-mid 20s (in mid 2016) when they discovered rt, and decided to send a snap to all of the cast members who had open snap accounts. ryan replied and, although things started out normal, they quickly became suggestive. at the same time, though, geoff also began talking to anon-2 and things also became flirty with them. they did exchange nudes and sext quite often while geoff was still married, but says they never slept with geoff themselves, although they knew others who did.

anon-2 ended up hooking up with ryan in person, and as with the other girls, he lied about not sleeping with anyone else, and insisted on not using a condom. they had sex multiple times that weekend, and anon-2 confirms that, like the other girls claimed, ryan was incredibly rough and violent with sex. anon-2 then proceeds to share many screenshots and unseen pictures of ryan, and in addition, provides messages from as recently as october 10th, where she goads him into talking about what all happened. ryan confirms he has spoken to a pr agent and a lawyer, and then makes a very weird non-joke about possibly needing an “anchor marriage” to get out of the country, implying he would ask anon-2 to do this for him. anon-2 finishes the main part of the doc by saying she knows ryan has been seeking out sex from craigslist, and that she was just a part of his grand manipulation scheme all along.

WEEK 3, DAY 1 (october 18th):

barely after midnight, we get yet another r/roosterteeth anon, posting a document detailing their relationship with ryan. much like the others, we can see that ryan followed the same pattern of flattery and kindness, getting them to talk about their mental health issues, goading them into doing things they were not comfortable with, and eventually dropping them when he realized he could not manipulate them like the others. not much else to say about it, but i wanted to catalogue it all the same.

ANON-2 PT. 2:

an update is added to anon-2′s google doc, at the end of page 13, addressing the geoff side of their post. they post candids of geoff in a hotel room, sent to them by a friend who’d slept with geoff. they add a third update later the same day, insisting that, like the girls, geoff had no clue that ryan was a sexual predator. anon-2 goes on to add that geoff never mentioned anything about his wife knowing about his sleeping around, but states that they will not be sharing more information unless given permission to do so from the girls affected. lastly, she begs people to stop hassling millie, geoff’s underage daughter.

GEOFF’S STATEMENT:

not long after anon-2′s update, geoff releases this statement on r/roosterteeth. he basically lays everything out, saying that he did indeed sext with and have sex with some fans during a period in his marriage where they were trying an open relationship, but that he felt uncomfortable with the imbalance due to the fans knowing so much about him and he so little about them. he goes onto say that he has taken a step back from rt due to extreme stress and mental health issues, and that he has not spoken about the ryan situation due to how overwhelming and upsetting it is. he closes by asking that people not drag his daughter and ex-wife into things, and leave all blame for him.

i am extremely mixed on this; on the one hand, geoff is an extremely skilled writer and speaker, and that is very clear in this document. he makes a point to share - almost to the point of oversharing - the situation between him and his then-wife to explain why he was associating with fans, and then moves past that to discuss his tumultuous personal life. however, he does not address the question of any age differences between him and these fans, and just refers to it as “two consenting adults ... getting to know each other.”

although this all seems well and good, one huge spanner was thrown into geoff’s story here; this tweet from michelle vologs, which states that ryan explicitly told her that geoff was engaging sexually with fans, and possibly knew some of ryan’s stories himself. notice that the anonymous replier, who is concurring with what michelle said, is the same anonymous twitter account who contacted ryan and adam on september 18th about their nudes leak - several WEEKS before the news dropped publicly.

although originally i was willing to believe what geoff had to say, as there was little conflicting evidence, michelle’s statement gives me extreme pause. if geoff was sleeping with enough fans that ryan knew about it, the chances of ryan not having mentioned his own experiences is very low - and on top of that, ryan has little to no reason to lie about this, as telling the truth would have actually been detrimental to his career, on the off-chance someone blabbed and it made its way back to geoff. so i am highly skeptical of the whole document.

WEEKS 3-11 (october 19th to january 2nd):

complete radio silence from ryan and adam both for a little under three months. as ryan was stated to have hired a pr agent and/or a lawyer amidst the initial scandal, its pretty easy to surmise that he was advised to just shut up and let things die down, and therefore did so. adam had gone quiet for a much longer time, so it was assumed he would not speak out again. however, people still felt that ryan was likely to try and make a comeback eventually. and, well...

WEEK 11, DAY 1 (january 3rd):

freckles, one of ryans former mods, posts this tweet containing this statement from ryan to his remaining subscribers, thanking them for sticking around and vaguely addressing “what a tough year its been” for him. unsurprisingly, this is met with IMMEDIATE retribution, as the message served as a reminder that a) many people forgot to unsubscribe and unfollow in the initial situation, and b) that ryan was still getting paid by twitch the entire time he was being ousted. this, of course, led to calls for ryan to be banned from twitch completely, given that it was his main vehicle for finding and grooming his victims.

it is unknown why he decided to do this, as it is transparently very stupid, but i think the entire series of events has made it quite clear that ryan is not only unintelligent, but EXTREMELY entitled - ryan couldnt last even a week into the new year before trying to lay the groundwork to return to his career, whereas adam managed to go quiet much earlier and remain that way for a much longer time, to let things cool off more significantly.

WEEK 11, DAY 6 (january 8th):

early in the morning, the owner of kiwifarms, null, posts a thread stating that adam kovic has reached out demanding the removal of his and jess kovic’s nude photos and videos. (reminder that i will not be linking to any threads on kf directly - you will have to seek those out for yourself.)

recall that, in the initial days of the scandal, the vast majority of the attention was on adam instead of ryan - and that was because of the sheer magnitude of his leaked photos, as well as the question of his wifes consent to their distribution (as most of the pictures/videos of her were taken from behind; with the benefit of hindsight, we can say fairly safely that she probably did not consent to the distribution, and possibly not their being taken either).

im not exactly sure on the legality of the situation, as null did not leak the photos himself but is allowing them to be hosted on his website, and adam himself would likely be found guilty of revenge porn due to him having been the one to send pictures of his wife without her permission in the first place. as for the pictures of adam himself, i would assume that null is somehow protected from prosecution or else i believe he would have already taken them down. the morality of leaving them up is EXTREMELY questionable, and i would say it probably is tipping over the line into morally wrong, but morality holds very little sway legally and so adam may not actually have any recourse here.

WEEK 13, DAY 4 (january 20th)

in the afternoon, its confirmed by twitter account @streamerbans that ryan haywood has been permabanned from twitch, and has lost his partnership with the website as well. this is obviously SUPER fucking late, as the crux of the scandal happened months ago (in october), but better late than never, i suppose.

his ban seems to be a natural consequence of two things: the obvious catalyst is his VERY bold message to his subscriber, but beyond that, twitch has also updated their rules and codes of conduct to address their handling of sexual harassment on their platform, from fans and streamers alike, and ryans actions fall very clearly over the line of acceptability. while its unknown whether ryans actions have anything to do with the drafting of some of the new rules - the rule against “attempting to coerce others into sexual favors via bribes” specifically seems VERY pointed at him - it is likely that twitch was already drafting these rules before the situation occurred, and ryans doings simply expedited their being put into effect.

in any case, the only sad part of this is how long it took; ryan was getting free money off of his fans who hadnt or couldnt unsubscribe for three months before this ban and the loss of his partnership were put into effect, which is very upsetting, but there isnt much that can be done about it now.

(JAN 30 EDIT: as you can tell, the situation has severely petered out from where it began; originally there were new updates and more information on a daily, almost hourly basis, and so it was necessary to break the story up day by day to get everything. since that is no longer the case, i will not be filling in any gaps between time periods; if something else happens two weeks from now, i will not try to fill in the two week silence, and will just skip to the next big event. apologies if this makes timelines confusing, but ive added weeks AND days to each event to make them easier to follow, so hopefully that helps.

any further updates to this post will go here, to keep the timeline together. everything below this line is optional reading, but i do highly recommend it, as it provides a lot of background context.)

-----

MISCELLANEOUS INFO

this is just a section for anything i think is contextually relevant that doesnt really fit anywhere else, or stuff that is not confirmed but highly suspicious. most of this will provide elucidating background for everything that went down, but none of it is necessary to read.

LOOKING BACK AT RYAN’S CONTENT:

because of how blindsiding these events have been, people began questioning if there were any tells that we as viewers missed over the years, and began going through old videos and other content to find anything of interest. ill link any relevant videos here with a brief summary of why theyre noteworthy:

- this video features ryan encouraging fans to do “whatever [they] need to get [themselves] to finish” (in reference to masturbating), and when trevor states that “there are laws that constrain us,” ryan says that “as long as you do it [in your head], it’s fine.” here he is clearly justifying his own actions to himself.

- this clip of ryan singing “black or white” by michael jackson, but he changes the lyrics to, “thing about my baby, it dont matter if youre black or white - or 12, or 9, or 8.” yeah.... i dont really need to say much else about that i dont think

- this post about ryan’s cover letter from his initial application to rt. the comment about “that sexy, deep voice that ladies love” wouldve been gross even without context, but with it, it appears that playing casanova with fans may have been his intent from the beginning.

- another video in which ryan “misses his flight because of uber.” he states that he missed his flight because the uber driver who was supposed to arrive didnt want to come and asked him to cancel the drive, forcing him to wait for another driver to be available. while they dont say explicitly, i am fairly certain hes talking about returning from pax west in seattle, which took place in early september - around the time that many of these stories (like tessa’s and michelle’s) take place. more likely than not, he fully lied about this story and was actually late because he was hooking up with a fan.

WHY 2017?:

if you’re paying attention to dates, you may notice that almost all of these events transpired - or began - in 2017. there are a few theories as to why, but ultimately i think the answer is quite simple; 2017 is when ryan made an instagram account, and is likely when he had the most direct access to fans. as was noted, he has had twitter for years and his snapchat was created probably a year or two before, and yet there are little to no stories taking place before 2017. most likely, his making an instagram account saw an influx of messages from fans, primarily teenage girls - a huge demographic on insta - and gave him a platform to begin the grooming process without anyone suspecting him.

CONJECTURE PT. 1: THE MEGGENING:

people began to speculate if ryan and meg are/were having an affair, as they spent quite a bit of time together for work, went on a trip to japan alone together, and have been the center of many a “joke” regarding their relationship, to the point of it sincerely bothering gavin (meg’s boyfriend). there are several clips of the achievement hunter guys making jokes about ryan and meg sleeping together behind gavin’s back, but heres one clip of them doing so with gavin in the room. notice his genuinely uncomfortable reaction.

initially i was ready to write this off as “women evil” conjecture, but honestly after looking into it a bit, i can sincerely see what people are talking about. as i said earlier, i find meg’s statement incredibly suspicious - the fact that she explicitly denies any knowledge of ryan’s doings even though that SHOULD go without saying, and that her message doesnt actually say anything negative about ryan or what he did at all, makes me feel extremely wary of her.

OCT. 12 EDIT: either yesterday or the day before, meg privated most of the highlights from her japan trip with ryan, but a few of them were luckily archived. here they are, if you’re curious: japan #1, japan #2, japan #3.

CONJECTURE PT. 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO:

in early february, its discovered that ryan haywoods home is up for sale, and has been for quite a while. (i will not be linking the listing for obvious reasons.) the house had been on the market for 63 days at that time, placing its initial listing date in very early december - that would only be two months after the initial story broke. on top of that, with the inclusion of the amount of time it takes to find a realtor and begin the selling process, the selling of the house was likely initiated in mid-to-late november, if not sooner.

there are multiple potential explanations for the selling of the house, of course - its possible they could no longer afford the upkeep due to ryan losing his highly lucrative job, or its possible that they moved to escape harassment from others. i find both of these fairly implausible for different reasons: the former because ryans wife also has a fairly high-paying job, and unless ryan is a complete dumbass, they certainly have enough money saved up to remain in that house if they wanted to. in addition, i find the latter implausible because its highly unlikely anyone was going to their house directly, as i think ryan would definitely have played the victim publicly over something like that.

the most obvious answer to me, given how quickly the house was put up for sale, is that the two have begun divorce proceedings and thus sold the house. finances as a motivator make no sense to me due to the speed with which the house was put up - its highly unlikely they blew through all of their savings in a month - and if they were staying together as a couple, it wouldnt make sense to vacate their home for no reason. of course, this is complete conjecture (thus the header LMAO), but it is interesting to note as it comes into direct contradiction with ryans claims of going to couples therapy with his wife.

RYAN’S TACTICS:

due to the number of accusations against ryan now, a pretty clear picture is painted of him and how he operates. a few things become clear when you put all of this information together. lets break it down bit by bit.

first: the girls. as i mentioned before, michelle notes in her video that ryan seemed to target young girls who were either insecure about themselves/their bodies, or had mental health issues. that pattern does seem to hold up, as all seven of the major accusers (tessa, michelle, leigh, kayla, katie, anon, and megashiny) openly discuss dealing with one or both of these issues in their respective stories. it’s almost undeniable that ryan pursued these types of girls on purpose in order to manipulate them more easily, as well as to have plausible deniability when confronted about them - a phrase which multiple girls have used in reference to him.

second: the method. ryan seems to have consistently used the exact same method of manipulating each of the girls. it goes pretty much like this:

- in early conversations, he is sweet and invested in the girl. once they are a bit more comfortable, he begins to “flirt,” making sexual comments and “jokes” to slowly but surely convince them to sext and exchange nudes with him.

- at the same time, he is sure to tell everyone he knows (mods and the like) about how “crazy” his girl of the week is, guaranteeing that she will not be believed should she try to tell someone what is going on between them

- once the conversations turn sexual, his demeanor changes completely, and he starts to become distant. conversations with him become infrequent to make the girl feel miserable when he is away and over the moon when he decides to talk to her, thus maintaining the constant star-struck feeling and ensuring that she is always just a bit more eager to do what he asks in order to keep him around

- he makes sure to litter conversations with comments about how much he loves his wife and kids, thus ensuring that the girl feels too guilty to let anyone know whats going on at the risk of damaging his relationship with his family

- once he has the girls backed into this corner, he begins reaching out only to talk about sex and to schedule in-person hook ups, and will not talk to the girls otherwise. this goes on over and over until he gets bored or the girl cuts contact with him.

he is consistent with this “defaming, denial, degrading” method, as we can see every single girl make reference to him treating them in the same way. from this, we can conclude one thing - he has a system. he has done this before, and he knows it works. even the girl with the most different experience, katie, was clearly being groomed and sexually coerced with the promise of payment, but when she did not budge ryan switched over to straight up financial manipulation, forcing her to take the money - and therefore making her financially beholden to him - and threatening her with cut contact should she not accept.

ryan also tried to isolate katie from her best friend, kayla, in an effort to prevent her from noticing that he was manipulating and grooming kayla for sex as well, and given that kayla was bullied so thoroughly in HIS community that he was one of the only people she felt safe around, it’s no wonder why he refused to deal with the situation when trick brought it up to him. these are straight up abuser tactics, and while i hesitate to throw that word around, it is clear that ryan is a dangerous, emotionally manipulative sexual predator, who specifically targeted young girls with little to no experience with sex and relationships. he is disgusting, and cruel, and i pray that he experiences the pain he inflicted on these girls ten times over.

#roosterteeth #rooster teeth #ryan haywood #adam kovic #long post #REALLY fucking long. im not even kidding #let me know if the under the cut thing is broken again and ill just make a google doc #cause wow #anyway ryan haywood is a piece of shit and belongs in jail and thats that on that #dark lord saltine

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sporksaber · 3 years

Text

Ok, I love the role swap concept with zuko and azula, but I feel like they switch their abilities and personalities a bit too and I think itd be more fun without that. Where Azula is an antisocial and unstable genius who wants to gain power and zuko still struggles with being the less powerful and extremely empathetic sibling. So here's how I'd do it.

(Note, this is just for fun. I'm not saying anyone else's version is bad. But I've though about this so much and need it out of my head before I go off cuz make a whole comic and I do not have the time, i need to work.)

First off, Azula wouldn't call out in concern for the men like how zuko did. In my version she's allowed into the meeting because of the aptitude for strategy shes shown. She speaks up because it's an inefficient plan that uses up too many resources when there are other options. This enrages her father and leads to the agni kai. Azula is terrified and feels betrayed but has no idea how to handle any of it. She fights back during the agni kai, but in her panic she sets off a bolt of lightning. Ozai finishes the match and severely burns on her lower back. Azula is banished for her use of lightning on the fire lord (bc ozai fears she will no longer be easy to manipulate and might plot his death) and is forced to leave the next morning.

Some things to note: azula is eleven at this point. I changed the placement of the scar bc I think zuko's is very symbolic in a way that doesnt suit azula. Zuko's scar being over his eye and close to the light chakra shows the way his view of the fire nation and honour obscures his vision and how he is unaware of the truth of the world under fire nation rule. I set azula's over her spine because that chakra is based on survival and blocked by fear. It also represents trust which will fit into her arc with the gaang. Finally, she doesnt have Iroh to guide her. One of the things that bothered me was Iroh writing her off as evil despite her being a mentally unstable child. She did have to be defeated, but the way he talked about it was too dismissive. (Personally I think he was projecting his views of his brother and his perceived failures with him onto her.) Azula isnt sent to capture the avatar so she isnt given soldiers. She's completely alone without an advisor to look to or keep her calm.

Azula is given a manned ship with a disgraced soldier and an attendant when she leaves. The way I see it the soldiers zuko had were probably more irohs than his. The soldier is relieved to not be executed but hates being demoted to playing babysitter to a child at sea. The attendant views it as a punishment and hates Azula for it. Eventually the attendant will betray her and be killed for it. Azula never trusted the soldier and he eventually leaves to start a family in an earth kingdom colony. Azula doesnt miss him, he was no longer useful. The loneliness does get to her though.

Azula is obsessed with getting the underhand, so she had been successfully building connections and planting spies where needed.

(Zuko has been acting as a respectable crowned prince. He holds a zealous loyalty to his nation and father. He still faulters as Iroh tries to steer him from tyranny, but his sights are set on his father's approval and that alone. Afterall, if his prodigy could be discarded who's to say what would happen to him if he failed?)

This brings us to the start of the series. Like Zuko Azula witnesses the trap on the old fire nation battle ship go off. She investigates and finds that an air bending avatar is living at the south pole village. She decides she wants to speak with him.

Azula didn't believe the avatar existed before this point. Hiding didnt add up to her knowledge of the morality of airbenders, so she assumed the air nation avatar from the start of the war would be dead. She would know if one had appeared in the water tribe, as the south had all its benders killed and the north was compacted so close together it would be impossible to hide. Earth would be harder, but they were most likely to fight back and out act. And if in ba sing se they'd be used as a weapon or gotten rid of to preserve the peace of the city. Once the culcle progressed to the fire nation it would either be used to take over the other nations or enf the cycle for good. After all, there hasn't been an air bender for a hundred years even if the rumors of some acolytes surviving were truthful.

Azula kidnaps aang with far more ease than she should of been able to. Once he stops struggling she calmly offers him tea and promises to release him once their discussion is finished. He takes the tea and drinks it without question and besides a wary glare shows no more hostility. She thought him a fool, the tea could have easily been poisoned and promised are nothing but words. His naivete makes her job easier though.

She finds out that he was suspended frozen in the avatar state the last 100 years. And so, Azula informs him of the war and the fire nations crimes, advising him to master the elements if he wants to prevent all his new friends and the avatar cycle from certain destruction. Aang is conflicted, he never asked for any of this. Azula just gives a bitter smile. "The hands of fate were never designed to take requests, they move without regard to any life dependent on it. Dont waste your breath when there is nothing you can do."

Azula wants to see Ozai fail. If helping the avatar is what it takes then so be it. When his friends appear to save him she let's them leave without a fight. Theyll be useful in the future.

As the gaang's travels kick off she sets out to find out if the rumours about the acolytes are true. In this she finds a traveling circus. The youngest daughter and an old friend of hers was eager to escape and found Azula's life exciting. She didn't hesitate after being invited along, insisting that traveling would be easy for her and that she'd pull her own weight.

She encounters the gaang a few times as time goes by. The relationship is reluctant on the water tribe siblings part, they dont trust her and hold a decent amount of fear towards her. Her cold and calculating demeanor was unsettling, but the unhinged way she fought was terrifying. Her form was perfect and her attacks were precise, but the bigger the fight the more lost she became as she laughed and shrieked and occasionally snapped at someone who didnt seem to be there. The only worse reaction was when she zeroed in on one opponent, picking them apart both mentally and physically as she drove them to the ground. )

Things that'll happen as I move through an episode list:

Azula doesn't have her ship attacked do she diesnt run into zhao while doing repairs, instead going straight to ty lee.

Azula learns that the gaang is on kyoshi island and heads ther after them. She has been keeping track of the avatar as they move. Ty lee gets along well with the kyoshi warriors while azula buts heads with them. They dont want her there and azula hates it when people get in the way. Zhao appears to try to capture aang and Azula dips at the same time as the gaang. She tells ty lee she can stay but she insists on sticking with azula. This puts her on edge.

Ty lee gets captured by earth benders, when she escapes on her own she cements her usefulness to Azula.

They run into zhao trying to capture the avatar and azula tells him she'll capture him first. They both attack aang during the solstice, though azula's attacks are all purposefully set to miss and trip up zhao as much as possible. Aang is the best way to prove her father wrong and she's not going to lose that.

They rob the pirates that try to capture the avatar. Azula needs the resources and it gives her leverage over the gaang.

After almost killing ty lee for scaring her by popping up behind her Azula tells her why she was banished. (In more of a "my own mother thought I was a monster" way than an opening up about trauma way.)

Azula learns that zhao has captured aang and frees him. She then sets to reworking her information network as not all of them are scared enough of her to not fail her. She remedies it quickly.

Azula learns that zhao is plotting her assassination and decides it's the perfect moment to fake her death.

Azula enters the north pole to defeat zhao and gain any information she can. Ty lee rades a library during the confrontation. Zhao is surprised and infuriated to see her alive, Azula smiles as she sends him to his death knowing that she is not only helping the avatar but also that he gave her a perfect way to hide from the fire nation. (When news of his sisters death reaches hum, Zuko doesnt know what to think. She was always cruel to him, but she was still his little sister.)

The crown prince of the fire nation is sent to capture the avatar. Azula follows him as he begins his search. (Zuko begins to think he's going insane as he keeps catching glimpses of his recently deceased sister out of the corner of his eye.)

Ty lee keeps running into a girl she slowly befriends. She's gloomy and sarcastic and ty lee thinks Azula would like her. (Zuko's fiance Mai tells him that she thinks his sister is still alive.)

As Azula notices ty lee become more and more distracted as she absorbed herself into the cultures that surround them she decides it's best for them to split up. Ty lee diesnt agree, but Azula leaves anyway. She has work to do.

While traveling alone Azula cant escape the thoughts of her mother. Of her fathers betrayal. Of the life she lost because the idiot elders had no grip on proper strategy that even a child could create. She meets a boy that reminds her far too much of zuko with a mother far to similar to theirs. When she sends the bandits controlling the town running she knows it's more than just controlling a territory that compelled her. But at the same time she doubts not following through on the whim would have bothered her.

Ty lee meets toph and chat for a bit. Ty lee tells her about azula and how she left. When toph tells her she should forget her she insists that azula didnt really ditch her and that they're still friends. They talk about their friends and childhood.

Ty lee finds Azula and immidiently jumps at her, which she does not enjoy. Ty lee insists that she still wants to travel with her and Axula sighs as she let's her tag along to the next location, ba sing se.

Azula slips through guards and protocols as she tries to gain any information she can to help her once they reach the city. Ty lee befriends a guy named jet and his group, the freedom fighters. When he tries to get more than friendship she turns him down and it becomes much more awkward.

Ty lee becomes a street performer and chames everyone she meets as Azula researches the dai lee and how they keep control. After lashing out in frustration ty lee drags her out to enjoy the city's night life.

Azula learns of the presence of the avatar and location of appa. She frees him and sets to work taking control of the dai lee. She let's herself be briefly captured but her plan shifts when katara is thrown in with her. Katara is pissed just being around her and azula plays up a cool kind of annoyance. Katara briefly catches sight of the burns on Azula's back and offers to heal her, only for Azula to freak out and yell at her to stay away, backing against a far wall in a fighting stance. They are saved by the rest if the gaang and ty lee shortly after.

Azula goes back to try and salvage her plan only to be caught off guard by the appearance of her brother and his offer to return to the fire nation. Not willing to lose all possible advantages, she agrees. They battle the gaang, and when they are almost captured azula sends a bolt of lightning at aang, causing them to retreat. Katara can heal him more easily than she can maneuver them out of an execution.

Azula returns to the fire nation with her brother, mai and ty lee, starting the beginning of a large power play between her and her father. They are sent to lo and li beach house. The relationship between the siblings is tense, zuko has always been the child born with nothing who gained everything when his blessed at birth sister lost it all. Azula has always been cruel, but he cant help but let his heart catch on the moments when she's not. ("My own mother thought I was a monster, My father thought i was too difficult to keep around" "Don't let their words blind you, you need to be more careful, zuzu." "I learned the hard way to never turn your back to anyone, and the scars will always be there as a reminder if I need it." )

Azula runs into iroh, who is very disapproving of her presence. He warns her to stay away from zuko and to watch herself while at the palace. Later, zuko comes to her asking about their great grandfather. Upon being pressed he admits that he was sent a mysterious letter. He thought she was going to burn it when he handed it to her but instead the heat from the fire revealed a hidden ink. "Honestly brother, did you ever pay attention at all during lessons?" They find a autobiographical scroll of their great grandfathers life and the secret that their other great grandfather was roku. Azula scoffed at the idea of bloodlines deciding fate and quickly left. But Zuko remained conflicted.

During the day of the black sun Azula confronts Ozai. As iroh and Zuko fight the avatar. She learns that her mother left for zuko's sake and that she was never going to be fire lord. Azula tells him she'll be somthing even better and leaves the palace.

Azula and ty lee follow the gaang to the western air temple. Katara immidprntly attacks but is quickly rendered unable to bend by ty lee. Azula tells them that the only way for them to of gotten out was for Aang to be incapacitated, and she knew katara could heal him. Aang decides they can stay but have to stay distanced from everyone else.

Azula tries to teach aang fire bending but is slowly growing sick while aang is barely able to produce a puff of smoke. Unable to sleep and constantly on edge, it soon affects her bending, sending her spiraling as she loses control on the only consistent power she's ever had. Her and aang journey to find the true source of fire bending to try to help their conditions.

Still sick, Azula is itching to do anything away from the temple. Finding sokka trying to reach the boiling rock to find his father, she decides to go with him as she knows the prison well. Sokka declines but she goes anyway. They dont find his father, but they do find suki. Azula formulates a plan but they postpone when sokka's father arrives.

Azula comes up with a new plan, now reluctant to include sokka. He tells her to trust him but she insists she has no reason to. Her sickness has been getting worse and he tells her she needs to trust him, making her angry. Only when he catches her while they're escaping dies she finally begin to accept trusting him, if only slightly.

(While they're away ty lee tries to convince

Azula goes with Katara to find the man who killed her mother. Azula has no concept of why katara is so upset, which causes her to get angry. But azula tracks the man anyway.

Ember island players- azulas character has the scar across her chest. She's absolutely insane and "not entirely inaccurate, but I'd never come up with such a dumb plan." Shes also heavily implied to be more than close to ty lee, which azula has no reaction to even as the others freak out.

I havent decided the ending, zuko will probably turn to the gaang's side. I'll add more later and maybe write or illustrate a bit.

#avatar the last airbender #atla azula #firelord azula #azula deserved better #atla au #role swap au

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saffronwritings · 3 years

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C L U M S Y / I I D A PART THREE

And for all this pain, that I can't explain There's a black flag wavin' tonight You know I let you down I've been clumsy with your heart again

I I D A | P A R T T H R E E (F i n a l)

[Part One] [Part Two]

C L U M Y M A S T E R L I S T

Word Count: 3.5k

A/N: I am so sorry for how delayed these posts have been! However, I had SO much fun writing Iida. I actually was worried I wouldn’t portray him right, but with some research and actually giving it a shot, I had so much fun writing him! I never thought I would actually simp over Iida??? (Dont worry Kaminari & Shinsou, I STILL YOU TOO MORE) But like, I get it now. He’s such a sweet character. With this being the final part for Iida, that means there will be more characters coming into play! That dones’t mean that Iida won’t get more love in the future! If you have suggestions or requests for Iida (or the other bois) just shoot me a message :) Hope you enjoy!!

Classes seemed to drag on for Iida after the little escapade with you this morning after homeroom. He was all out of focus and even skipped lunch for that matter. He found himself sitting on the rooftop where he had met you previously that week. When he had admitted to noticing you and potentially admitted falling for you. In the exact spot Aizawa caught him technically skipping class and threatening to expel him. Iida was confused and baffled by what you had said.

“WELL, MAYBE IF YOU DIDN’T SNEAK YOUR WAY INTO MY BED WHEN I WAS SICK AND MAKE ME FALL FOR YOU, I WOULD PROBABLY ACTUALLY CAREMORE.”

Those words kept echoing in his head, making Iida breathe out in frustration. He knew he had to apologize to you, but when you refused to show up to class what was he supposed to do? He genuinely was curious about you, even if you were the opposite of him. Even with Aizawa down his throat about his recent behavior, he still wanted nothing more than to be in your presence. Something about the morning he came to check in on you sparked something in him for you. In that moment you were vulnerable and trusted Iida enough to take care of you; enough to trust in him enough to not take advantage of you.

Iida heard the rooftop access door open, and for a split moment he was hopeful that maybe it was you. He was met with disappointment when it was just Midoriya. “Are you alright, Iida? I’m a bit worried about you.” He sheepishly said. Iida shook his head no and sighed. He took off his glasses and put them onto the top of his head. “For being class representative, I have been slacking in m duties. Both academically and as a friend.” He admitted to Midoriya, who had moved from the door to where Iida had sat himself.

“I will say, it’s very unlike you to skip out on meals. I looked for you everywhere, but when someone from class 1-B told me they saw you come to the roof, I was even more baffled. This is usually where Kacchan or Y/L/N hang out.” Midoriya pointed out, resting a fist onto his chin in thought. “Yes, I know, I found Y/L/N out here one day when she skipped class. It’s quite relaxing to just stare at the sky when you’re stressed.” Iida huffed out. Midoriya stared at him with a look of concern.

"I don't know all of what's going on between you and Y/L/N, but I think you should go talk to her. She seemed pretty upset this morning." Midoriya stated after taking in Iida's pained expression. "I came up here looking for her, figuring she may be up here ditching classes again. I assumed wrong. She's probably in her room at Heights Alliance." Iida confirmed, letting Midoriya in on his thought process. "You know, I try not to mingle in the gossip that goes around. However, it seems that Yaoyorozu thinks the two of you are getting pretty close too. I don't want you getting in the middle of something that may stress you out more." The green haired boy confessed.

Another deep sigh left Iida's lips. He knew Momo had potentially had a thing for him, yet he seemed to be leading her on as well. "I'll have to be forward with her after our final class today then. Then I'll go talk with Y/L/N when we get back to the dorms." Iida stated, standing up with this plan laid in place. Yet, there was still a troubled look on Midoriya's face. "Is there more?" He asked his friend. He chewed on his lower lip anxiously. "You know I would never suggest something of this nature, especially with you being the class rep." Izuku started out slowly, making Iida raise an eyebrow in question.

“You should probably go see her now, Iida.” Midoriya stated in a low tone, hoping to not upset the class rep. Iida immediately thoughts went towards Aizawa and how he had been scolded at not once, but twice for his inappropriate behavior in regard to his duties as class rep. Yet, he knew Midoriya was right. Of course, if you were indeed at Heights Alliance, he could just see you once class was let out. What kind of impression would that make though? You were already very upset with him by the way you had glared at him before leaving the classroom. “Just something to think about Iida.” Midoriya said before heading back to the roof access door.

…

You forgot when you finally stopped crying in your dorm room, sitting against your bedframe. The tears that hadn’t gotten wiped away had dried against your cheeks and your eyes felt like they burned. You looked at the time on your nightstand and noticed how it was only one period after what would have been lunch. You had skipped the rest of your morning classes with no intention of going back to your afternoon ones. Aizawa had come to your dorm to check in on you after homeroom class was over much to your surprise.

“I know you know your material, but it wouldn’t hurt for you to show up to class every now and then. You are an impeccable student even for the number of times you slack off. If you showed some actual interest maybe the class rep would cut you some slack. I’m not going to bore myself with hearing the details of my student’s drama. I’m sure the two of you will sort things out.” Aizawa said, putting a comforting hand on your head before walking away.

It was after that moment you had stopped crying so hard. That’s when the tears had started to falter, and you started to take deep breaths in order to calm yourself down. That didn’t stop you from being startled when you heard a knocking on your dorm room door. You figured it might be another teacher checking in on you, but when you opened the door and saw Iida standing there you were baffled. Iida hesitated to look at you at first but when he did and saw your eyes bloodshot and your face stained with tears, his heart broke in half; knowing full well that he was probably the reason you had cried.

You wanted to slam the door in his face more than anything. Frustration burned in your core as you stood there silently. “If you are here to tell me to get to class, you can forget it, Tenya.” You spat out, getting ready to close the door. Your next class was going to begin soon so it was surprising to even see him there. “That’s not why I am here at all, Y/L/N.” He retorted, seeing how tense and uncomfortable you looked to be in his presence. “Well, whatever it is can’t be that important. Class starts soon and you’ll be late class rep.” You choked out, trying to keep your composure but you were still hurting from earlier.

“I’m here to apologize. I was too harsh on you this morning. After our meeting on the roof the other day, Aizawa found me and chewed me out. I was frustrated because I do everything in my immediate power to follow all the rules. Yet, with you, I find myself slipping up and getting in trouble. It worried me. It shouldn’t have worried me to the point of hurting your feelings though.” He admitted to you.

It was like your voice was stuck in your throat. He wasn’t staying behind to work on a class project, he was serving detention that Aizawa gave him because of you. “You got detention because of me.” You whispered out and almost immediately covered your mouth with your hands. “I can’t say that I’ve ever experienced getting detention before.” He laughed, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. “Then why did you lie to Yaoyorozu?” You pressed. Did you really have the right to be questioning him? You shook that thought from your head; of course you did! He led you on to believe maybe you had a chance. He embarrassed you in front of your entire class.

“I didn’t want word going around that I was serving detention. I was embarrassed because I am supposed to set examples for my other classmates.” He admitted with a sigh, looking uneasy with the question. “Why didn’t you just rat me out to Aizawa? You didn’t have to take that detention if you told him you were getting me to go back to class. I would have had to serve detention, not you.” You asked in an obvious state of confusion. “I guess it wouldn’t have looked good on me to tell my teacher that my crush was ditching class and to get her into trouble.” He finally said after stumbling over his words for a few minutes.

“Yeah, okay.” You laughed out, rolling your eyes. “Spare me the pity, Tenya. I know you have the hots for Yaoyorozu.” This statement took him by utter surprise. Izuku was right about how rumors were circulating about him and Yaoyorozu. “Well that’s unfortunate for her then, I’ll have to settle that immediately so no one else gets the wrong thoughts.” He said, before turning on a heel to walk back towards campus. “Wait, what?” You sputtered, walking to catch up to him. Surprised by you following him, he turned back around and grabbed your wrist and pulled you back to your dorm room. “Take it easy, you’ve emotionally stressed yourself out. I promise this time I will be back to check on you after classes. I just wanted to come to apologize to you.” He coerced you back into your room.

“You promised last time and you never did. How can I take your word for it this time?” The question slipped out of your mouth before you could stop it. Iida’s blue eyes bore into your own before taking your hand into his. “Y/L/N, I promise I will see you after classes are over.” He whispered, bringing your hand to his lips, and placing a ghost of a kiss onto it. Your face heated up immensely by the bold action of your class rep. “See you then.” He nodded, before rushing back towards the school building. You held your hand to your chest, baffled by what just happened. Yet, you couldn’t fight the smile that was forming on your face as you walked back into your dorm room.

…

Iida had barely made it back in time for class, but with the help of his quirk and Izuku covering him, he was able to just slip into class undetected by Aizawa. Izuku shot him a quizzical look as if asking if he had gone to your dorm room to apologize. In which, he nodded in response with a feint smile spreading across his face. Ochako seemed lost in this odd silent exchange but Izuku had told her he would fill her in later on. Iida was grateful to have such good friends like Midoriya looking out for him. He would have never considered skipping classes to go check in on a girl, but with the help of his friend he felt like his decision was justified.

Classes went on, and all Iida could think about was you. How small your hands were in comparison to his own, how soft they felt. How your face flushed by his gentle touches. The way you looked adorable being so flustered by his actions. There was no denying it now, the boy was smitten by you. This didn’t bother him as much as he thought it would. He wasn’t going to try and change you, that’s the last thing he wanted to do.

Yes, you broke the rules. You two were polar opposites, but maybe that is what he needed in his life. Was for someone to teach him when to take it easy and when to take much needed breaks. You might not have had the best grades in the class, but you also didn’t seem to be failing. Maybe he was exactly what you needed to motivate yourself into doing better for not just yourself, but for others. “Iida, if I was mistaking it almost looks as if you’re off daydreaming.” Yaoyorozu stated once class had let out. His smile faltered when he saw Momo standing at his desk, smiling.

“I was actually hoping to talk to you after class, Yaoyorozu.” He stated in a more serious tone. “Me too! I’m glad that great minds think alike, shall we walk back to Heights Alliance together?” She suggested, moving her arm to suggest they both walk out of the classroom together. “We can talk right here. I have something to attend to after this that’s important.” He denied her request to walk back to the dorm building together. The last thing he needed was for anyone else to get the wrong idea of the two of them again. This took Momo off guard with his cold disposition. “Momo, I think you are a great friend and an even better student. However, there seems to be rumors speculating about the two of us. I would like to settle those, right now.” He started, his tone still coming off stand-offish.

“Oh what, that the two of us would make a good couple? I agree! I was actually thinking of asking you to join me for tea at the local coffee-“ “Yaoyorozu, I am not interested in dating you.” Iida cut off Yaoyorozu from her statement. She froze and looked at Iida in shock. “Wait, you don’t feel the same way?” She whispered, confusion and hurt flooding her eyes. “I’m sorry, I have feelings for someone else. If I misdirected you with my own feelings, I apologize but I do not feel the same way.” He continued, packing up his bookbag. “Oh what? You’re interested in our lazy classmate who skips all our classes?” She angrily spit back at him, embarrassed for getting rejected like this.

“Yaoyorozu, as your class representative, I must say I don’t take kindly to you down talking one of our classmates.” Iida stated, but in a warning tone. Her eyes widen at his warning tone and she bit her bottom lip. This made her step back from him and walk away frustrated. A sigh left his mouth as he watched her walk away upset. He had hoped it would have gone better than it did. He quickly put his bag on his shoulder and made his way towards Heights Alliance. Izuku, Shoto, and Ochako were all sitting in the front lounge area and smiled to see him. “Want to join us for a study session, Iida?” Ochako offered.

“Sorry guys, I made prior arrangements. Maybe next time.” He said as if he was on a serious mission. “We’ll catch you at lunch tomorrow?” Shoto asked, raising an eyebrow his way. “I wouldn’t hold my breath on that, Todoroki.” Izuku smiled, nodding for Iida to get going. This made Ochako and Shoto look questioningly back and forth from Iida to Izuku. “Thanks Midoriya, I’ll see you all tomorrow.” He smiled before taking off towards the staircase. He didn’t realize how fast he was walking towards your dorm before he slowed himself down.

He knocked on your door and waited for a response. He was however, met with silence on his end. “Y/L/N?” He asked before knocking on the door again. You didn’t answer his attempts of getting your attention. Maybe you were still upset with him from what he had said that morning. He couldn’t hold that against you in the slightest, but it didn’t sting any less for you to be ignoring him. Feeling dejected and idiotic for trying to make amends, he trudged back down to his own dorm room to put his belongings down.

He was very startled to see you standing outside his door room though. “Y/N?” He breathed, startled that you were waiting for him at his own dorm. You had a slight blush spread across your face and you were fidgeting with your hands. “I was nervous you wouldn’t come check on me after classes ended. I figured that maybe if I waited for you at your dorm that I could at least talk to you here.” You admitted, still fumbling with your thumbs. Iida relaxed and a soft smile spread across his lips. He walked up to you and took your hands into his own. “I promised you I’d come see you. I meant it this time.” He whispered, once again bringing your hands to his lips.

This action had once again made your face flush a very bright red. “If I were none the wiser, I would think you were running another fever Y/L/N.” He teased you, bringing you close to him. He had wrapped his arms around your waist, and you couldn’t fight the blush that was etching itself deeper on your face. “Do I need to take care of you again, Y/N?” This caught you off guard; he always referred to you by your last name. You looked up to see him genuinely smiling at you brightly. “I-I should be alright. However, I wouldn’t mind spending some time with you. If you don’t mind, that is.” You stuttered out, avoiding eye contact. “I would really like that, Y/N.” He admitted, the smile never breaking from his face.

“Just know, I will always come and take care of you when you are sick from now on.” Iida admitted to you, making you gape at him in surprise. “I don’t understand.” You whispered. He rolled his eyes and continued to smile at you. “How many times do I have to tell you, that I like you, Y/N? I’m not just saying that. I mean it. I turned Yaoyorozu down before coming to see you. I can’t get you out of my head. I don’t mind getting in trouble if it means getting to see and talk to you.” He admitted, making your heart soar. You never imagined the class representative admitting his own feelings towards you. You always thought Iida was out of your league, especially with your lackadaisical nature towards school.

“I need someone like you to help ground me, to help me recognize when I need to slow down and just appreciate the clouds. Now, I’m not saying I’m going to be skipping class with you, that’s just silly. However, I will not be as uptight about everything.” He joked, making you smile. “Not even every once in a blue moon?” You questioned, a sparkle of mischievous in your eyes. He hummed in thought before shaking his head. “I do have a duty to fulfill as class rep, you know. However, I wouldn’t mind skipping a few study sessions to spend time with my new girlfriend, if she accepts my feelings back.” He slurred quickly.

You batted your eyes at him, dumbfounded. “You don’t have to accept them back, don’t feel like I am pressuring you.” He quickly stated, almost pulling himself away from you. However, you grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled his lips into yours. Iida was now the one who was flushed with red from his neck to the tips of his ears. You pulled back with a shy smile. “That was very inappropriate for school standards, Y/N! What if Aizawa walked by! We would be getting reprimanded!” He whisper yelled at you, removing his arms from you to chop them in the air frantically. “I don’t hear you saying anything about not enjoying it, Tenya.” You remarked. His mouth fell open for a moment before he coughed and pulled himself together.

“Yes, I will be your girlfriend, Iida.” You stated, laying your head on his chest. Shock overtook Iida’s features at first, but they softened by your touch. He wrapped his arms that he was frantically moving before around you in a strong embrace. “I meant it; I will always be here to take care of you. Protect you. Do whatever I can to make sure you are still smiling and not crying ever again.” He declared, kissing the top of your head. You hummed in response.

“Now, let’s go relax. I think we’ve both had a very long and eventful day that warrants some downtime.” Iida said, pulling away from your embrace. “Don’t we have a test on Monday?” You questioned. “That’s two days from now, we can study at some point this weekend. Why don’t we just, watch a movie together?” He suggested, the red coming back to his face as he rubbed the back of his head, nodding towards his dorm room. A smile crept up onto your lips as you nodded and took him by the hand and drug him into his dorm room for a night filled with cuddles, movies and stolen kisses.~

Taglist:

@ghostexhibit, @devildom-express, @lyrical-panic, @tragedy-of-sorts

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plutoswrath · 3 years

Note

i’m sorry to annoy you with this again. i just look up to your kpop mixed with astrology content. but lucas’s neptune contact with his mc is going to annoy the shit out of me until this is fixed. the cloudiness that neptune brings to his public image is something that i think possibly fuels these situations further. false accusations and mixed perceptions based off of them is exactly what makes these scandals to continue on and on. and i’m sick of it. both sides ignore what the other is saying and it gets nowhere. neptune, the malefic bastard.

Hello! I saw your recent asks and I appreciate your words regarding my content, thank you so much for the kind words! <3

I will touch on astrolgy under the cut, but before this happens, I want to leave a few words. There's a reason why I didn't answer the previous questions I received (not only yours op) regarding the Lucas situation so far. For several reasons I didn't want to feed into any sort of (perceived) sensationalism in regards to the Lucas situation, even though I'd really love to look at the situation from an astrological point of view. That people are divided on this topic is to be expected, but I think the way it has been handled by majority so far is very bad. I really want to elaborate on my reasoning why we should rethink the way we talk about/represent the Lucas situation right now, but as this topic is very kpop specific everything will be under the cut.

My reasoning for avoiding any questions about it until now:

1. People already don't take the situation seriously enough: Regardless of what your standpoint is, I'd like for people to consider looking at it from a more critical point of view for a second: The allegations are not about him being exposed as ‘just a f-boy’ as some people make it out to be, they are more serious than that. Lucas allegedly manipulated and used these women for his own emotional/sexual/financial needs and ego boost. The fact that he has money and allegedly still used other people to provide financially for him just demonstrates the power play underneath it all. He abused his position of power as an idol, the power dynamics between him and fans who idolize him are plain and simple just completely off. Please think about the fact, that he allegedly decided who to date on at fansigns. This alone gives no security to any fans that want to attend fansigns in the future. TW SV: he also talked one of these women into having sex with him + doing it unprotected, which is not only emotionally/sexually manipulative/coercive and can possibly be traumatic for them but also heightens the risk for transfering STD's as END TW he was supposedly seeing people at the same time/cheating. In general, the behavior he gets accused of leaves trauma and is abuse, to be more specific abuse of power on multiple levels and his social position makes it just easier to continue abusing that power. As you've mentioned yourself op, there is a huge back and forth about the allegations, and I know people like to take situations like the one of Taeyong as an example to justify that not every public apology is real and that allegations turn out to be false years later, but I believe it's different this time and that the allegations that came forward were real. Even his cbar closed, a fanbase that works closely with Label V (!), that alone shows that there is 'at least' some truth to the story, or else his hardcore fanbase wouldn't have decided to turn their back on him in matters of just days. Also, all the 'jokes' and the portrayal of 'juicy gossip' people make about the situation just downplays and ridicules the possible traumatic experiences of the people that were hurt by his actions. If anyone decides to not believe these allegations until SM gives a more specific statement, that's fine, but please do so without making fun of the people who were victims of his behavior, as there is already little to no sympathy for them online. It makes it just way harder for any survivors in the future to speak out on their experience. People say it's 'nothing illegal, just morally wrong' but given the fact that he is also a person in power, the line between 'just' morally wrong and illegal can be very thin in some cases. And please overthink arguments such as: 'this is typical boy behavior for someone in his 20's'/ 'he's just an f-boy' or 'boys will be boys' because they are deeply misogynistic and we shouldn't normalize behavior like that, thus making the root of the problem actually way deeper than most people think.

2. WayV's future: This mainly goes for people who are fans of WayV. I know not everyone probably likes to hear this, but another thing why wild speculations, sensationalism or even possible defence about this situation should be kept on the low is WayV's career. I want to be honest here, but I'm scared for their future, their comeback for october has been cancelled for now and they are put on a hiatus for several months as far as I know. They were on a good path of gaining more and more recognition and establishing themselves even better as a c-pop group, but now Luca's reputation in China (their target audience) is as good as gone and that pulls all of WayV down to rock bottom with him. People really need to try seeing the story out of the eyes of the korean and especially chinese fans as well, their perception of the allegations (especially after the Kris Wu situation!) are way different and more serious than the ones of i-fans and i-fans have to accept that. Also, we all know how companies (especially SM) handle these type of situations: keep the people on the low till the storm has calmed down. But will the storm ever calm down for Lucas when his public image is basically destroyed, and thus WayV as well? What I want people to understand is that this whole situation affects WayV and their career directly, actually on the biggest scale possible. All the work so far is at risk to be for good and I think a lot of fans tend to forget that, things look especially critical for HenXiaoYanKun if WayV would be to continue/redebute/fall apart. It doesn't matter if Lucas talking bad about the members/the companies/shows he works with/for was real or not in the end, because unfortunately damage is already done, WayV's image (WayV= family) is already tarnished and WayV as a group will suffer from this. You summed it up with malefic Neptune the best actually: We all don't know the full confirmed truth about the situation and will most likely never know it. (small astro insight here as well, but part of Neptune is to accept fantasy for what it is: fantasy, and thus turn to cold reality when you're in too deep)

3. What O'd advice the fandom to do right now: Regardless of your opinion on the situation, what we as a fandom can do best right now is staying on the low, wait things out, and stop adding more fire to the situation with our actions and wait how the situation actually developes, since a) we can not fasten the process and b) a lot of rumors, false information and unnecessary details get exposed to mudd the waters and to discredit the statement of the victims as well. I've seen some strong reactions from both sides, but as someone who's a big fan of nct in general I really just want to say that part of the fandom throwing a fit on the internet leads basically to nothing, it actually only reflects even worse on nctzens/weshennies and thus on WayV's (and also NCT as whole) image as well. Things right now are handled internal, not extern. Whatever gets through to the public will be half of the story anyway. A lot of people seem to forget, that we talk about SM and all they care for right now is saving themselves economically (think about the domino effect this situation has on the whole group/company), so we will have to see what their final decision is going to be, if anything will happen at all. For now, be patient, wait and see. Last words: It's okay to feel hurt/confused/angry/drained. Even though most of us are aware that we dont know any celebrity's character, it's still hard to swallow and to digest because you were a fan of that artist. Let it take time and vent. Take a break from it if it gets too much! Talking about it to process your emotions better is okay and very valid, but keep in mind that you should not worsen the situation by doing so - it's already absolute chaos.

Also: This statement is by no means a direct attack to anyone or me trying to push my opinion onto you, just my two cents in how to handle the situation best right now, because our hands are basically tied. Also: agree to disagree. If you don't like that I side with the victims (unless there is an official statement that Lucas is proven not guilty, which I doubt, unfortunately) then so be it, but don't start a war in my inbox for our opinions differing.

-------

Now, to astrology:

Disclaimer: This analysis will not be very light-hearted, but remember that it's just a theory and not me trying to confirm anything!

First of all op, sorry for just answering you know, but I neded some time to think through how to adress this without adding to the fire with my astrological analysis! Boy, does the birth time fit the shoe right now. To be fair as I did my short rising sign analysis about him recently, I cancelled out every other fire rising except for Leo, because I got stuck on the ego part a bit. Anything for me made sense, as long as it highlights his ego, which by itself doesn't have to be a bad thing automatically, but there's always two sides of the coin as we all know.

I looked into the transits the past week and added a few asteroids/mathematical points as well. An anon before pointed to the full moon happening in his tenth house, conjunct his sun, etc. (I deleted the ask because I didn't know what was going on at that time and thought it was just the 'usual' rumors that once in a while get spread around, but after looking more into it I decided this was not the right time to stirr the pot in any kind of way or treat it as funny, hot gos). But yeah a full Moon in Aquarius happening in his 10th house AND on top of that Saturn in Aquarius, conjuncting that Moon and his natal Uranus in the 10th! Talk about destrcution of any stable foundation and a change in a public image! Honestly, looking at astrologically the way his public image just got radically destroyed over night, with Saturn and the Moon having been in a conjunction (in his chart it was in the 10th house) is kinda eery even. Talk about collective consciousness - not only exposing quiet literally the feelings of the collective, but also doing so in the favor of others and gaining collective emotional consciousness. Take this with a grain of salt (!), because we're still in a tense situation, but I'm tapping into the darker, unfriendlier side of astrology now. Taking his confirmed birth time, he has Nessus in Sagittarius in his 8th house and as I saw that I could feel myself shifting into the surprised pikachu face. I am not saying that this prooves the allegations whatsoever, but as you seemed to be very interested in anaylzing the case in-depth as well, the allegations fit his Nessus - jumping from partner to partner, carelessness (regarding physical intimacy as well), making people share all their ressources with him/finacial gain, and basically the whole jist of gaining control/being in a power position in intimate connections. Keep in mind that this is only one interpretation of Nessus though, Nessus can also show the complete opposite to someone 'turning to their dark side'. On top of that, his Nessus was conjunct transit Phollus the past week, so if anything, we can see that a large event triggered him to 'open his eyes' and face anything of an 'obstacle' that hinders him from seeing the 'truth' to a larger picture and his own nature/destiny. Pholus can symbolize change that will alter your perception of the responsibility you have for yourself and others.

But my latest new interest with these two asteroids aside (asteroids just add a little more nuance to a situation after all), I want to touch on Lilith too, since you (op) have mentioned Lilith before in one of your asks!

He has his Lilith exactly conjunct his Descendant when we consider his confirmed birth time. What happened just now can be seen as 'backfiring' of his actions, either Lilith embodying the women who expose him now for his 'inappropriate' behavior, but also simply fans shaming him now for his alleged manipulative/imoral behavior, especially shaming him about who he chose to date and how. Next to that, you've mentioned Lilith opposite Moon and it just makes me think about him possibly feeling very indecisive and potentially in denial about what he actually needs to be fulfilled in order to be emotionally happy and thus leading to him appearing to have this 'second, dark side' to him now. BML is not necessarily opposite the Moon in my opinion, it's just the side of the subconscious we don't really like to deal with and all we're told not to express and desire because it can be conflicting in the eyes of others (thus BML also leading to a lot of recklessness on the negative side). I think if we take the allegations into consideration, regardless of how much of it is true of it, it can be a good example what happens, when an opposition gets out of balance, as it also manifests outwardly a lot! Lilith shows in his 'double life' aka what he allegedly did with fans. Lilith wanted an outlet and found one by working behind the scenes. If we take in his supposed Taurus rising, which his Lilith is in an exact opposition with, it's a good example of what can lurk underneath the surface.

And of course, last but not least, Neptune and Sun conjunct his MC. People are quiet literally blinded by him more than they would like to think. Also: Lucas was always known for his 'flirty & charismatic' nature, this is another reason why people think we shouldn't be surprised he 'turns out to be like that in real life'. I'm not analyzing this argument right now, but what I think is very interesting is how Sun conjunct MC literally ties a good amount of their personality to their career - they want to be accepted and shine for their personality/big part of their individuality. Idols play a role, no matter how transparent they appear to us, but it's really funny how this 'image' of him melts almost seemingly with parts of his personality (almost af if you were to quiet literally sell your self) and as you've mentioned: Neptune only adds to that, unfortunately.

#replies #anonymous #might delete later??#idk depends if the situations gets even worse

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nightswithkookmin · 3 years

Note

Imo there is enough to support the possibility of a romantic relationship, but you are writing full on narratives with impossible specificity. You know what confirmation bias is but some young impressionable people dont yet . Forgive me but misleading with ' alt facts' can hurt someone even if you dont mean it. I think you are a good person not looking to hurt anyone. But the way you postulate without any evidence makes your actions a little but like those of a charlatan. Peace and kindness

All these kind words you spew...

It feels more like an advice than a question so I'm not sure how to respond to it...

Let me just say thank you? I never quite understood what the brouhaha was about with my posts but after talking to a few people, 'on the other side' lol and reading your Ask, I think I'm starting to get a better sense of what the problem is.

Something about young impressionable minds or people?

Let the council of elders know, those are not my audience please. I cater to a much more mature audience- at least so far. The people that I interact with and engage with on my posts on and off Tumblr are very mature and not impressionable at all.

They are People with brains who can tell an opinion from fact and can engage in deep complex controversial conversations without throwing up, shedding tears or cussing through to the heavens.

If there are 'impressionable people' reading my blogs- they do so at their own risk. If you know any such people or they run to you with my theories kindly point out to them it's just theory because that's what my opinions are.

I think the best thing you can do is to advice such people to grow up if they are going to sit at the adult table or not read my posts at all. I think you need to learn to hold the right people accountable for their actions.

The best I can do in this case- to hold myself accountable, is to put up a disclaimer on my posts to let people know what it is that they are reading- something I do quite often. But I will make conscious efforts to put up those disclaimers each time henceforth. Thank you.

That I write full on narratives with impossible specificity:

Is this Latin for, 'you write fiction get the fuck outta here?' Chilee.

I don't even know what you mean by this exactly so I may not be able to respond to it to your satisfaction. Bare with me.

So what if I write fiction? What is wrong with writing fiction? Do you hate fiction writers? I don't get what the hate is with these complaints honestly. Do you want me to put up a disclaimer stating my blogs are fiction? Would that help? I would glady do it.

If it helps you sleep at night think of my blogs as fiction- a rose by any other name. I've been keeping up with Shakespeare. Lol.

I don't think it's that deep. Listen, you gotta understand that just because we both 'ship' Jikook don't mean we are on the same team...

Most alt shippers I know and who read my posts and engage with it are not even Army to begin with, for your information. They could care less about these shipping politics of yours. Have you thought about that?

Some simply ship JK and JM and support them because they believe they are members of the LGBTQ plus community not because they are part of BTS.

There are different communities out there who are also into Jikook- for very different reasons. You gotta respect that.

To you, Jikook is just a ship within BTS that may or may not be real, but to some of us they have very much outgrown that description...

They are a brand of their own, a power couple and members of the LGBTQ plus community- Gay Icons extraordinaire. I think we take very different stock in Jikook. So stop trying to fit us all into one box.

It's disrespectful to try and control the way that people perceive their OTP and support them. Jikook don't just belong to Army Jokers, they belong to different communities outside Army. Are you aware of that?

And please don't confuse the intersect. I am an alt-shipper yes but I just so happen to be an Army too. But if I wasn't an Army, I'd still pretty much 'ship' and support Jikook- make no mistake. There are quite a few of us running around these streets, you know?

So you have every right to want to gatekeep your Army Jikook- but you have to do that without infringing on other rights of other 'Jikook communities.'

Throughout my blogs I have tried to shed light on what altshipping is because I thought it would help bridge the gap but clearly that hasn't worked. Sigh.

Misleading alt facts

Do you not know what it means or you are just being ironic?👀

Why is it ok for you to believe and proclaim that JK and BigHit lied about JK dating the Tattoo artist but it's not ok for me to believe JK is telling the truth when he says he didn't date her and that BigHit saw an opportunity to kill two birds with one stone- hence why they didn't press charges against the shop for breach of privacy like they had said they were going to do. Instead, they had asked the shop to keep calm till the scandal died down on it's own?

You start your piece off with the whole, 'there is enough evidence to support a romantic relationship' between JK and the tattoo shop lady- I assume.

For context, this Ask by this anon is in response to my recent post/ answer on the tattoo girl scandal where the topic of discussion was on BigHit, JK and the tattoo artist and not Jikook perse.

A statement that is in direct conflict with JK's statement, BigHit's and the lady in questions, all denying that there was a romantic relationship between her and Jungkook- and somehow I am misleading who- who now with my theory??? Chileee.

Do you see the problem here? Double standards- the hallmark of bigotry. Lmho. You are literally doing the very thing you are accusing me of. Making confident assertions and claiming you know more about JK and the Lady's relationship and even have 'enough evidence' contrary to BigHit, JK and the Tattoo artist's statements denying the rumors- at least when I theorize I admit I'm being delusional. What's your excuse? When you say charlatan are you referring to yourself? You must be. Lmho.

Now I'm confident in my comprehension skills and intelligent enough to know when you make an assertion like this- it is your opinion and you are just stating your opinion. If you are not then honey you'd be opening yourself up to some serious litigation... goodluck I guess. Lol.

You are allowed to form an opinion about a topic. There is nothing wrong with that. If to you, JK and this person dated that is fine. I am not going to cyber bully you, stalk you, throw slurs at you, harrass you, dox you, slid into people's Dms to spread hate and lies about you just because I don't agree with your opinion. And for the record, I don't agree with your opinion. Hehehehe.

I have stated my opinion on the matter. I said I think JK and this person did hang out, go on dates but that there was no romantic sexual relationship between them because I believe that would have had much serious consequences and effects on Jikooks dynamics no matter how much they tried to keep a cool facade. Whoever felt cheated on would have acted more insecure than usual post the incident- how does this make me a charlatan? Are you saying it's wrong it have an opinion? Chileee.

Now if you can produce 'evidence' of them having sex or even kissing, then I will gladly change my mind on the topic and not sweat it.

Jikook have done way worse questionable things in 7 good years and people still don't believe they are dating. Jk hangs out with a female friend a few times in less than a month and suddenly he is dating her? Lmho.

You don't need me to tell you people are more eager to accept a heterosexual relationship than wrap their heads around the fact that two male idols are gay and in a gay relationship with eachother. Don't you just love it when homophobia meets heteronormativity and stinks? I do. Lol.

I mean this is a fandom that thinks JK is 'too touchy' and doesn't respect his boundaries- they practically swear JK is cheating on Jimin with every member any time he hugs, kisses, wings at within the group. You think they will be 'objective' about JK hanging out with a girl? Even if it happened once?

You said something about confirmation bias.... I will not touch it. Lmho.

This is not the first time JK has gone on a date with a girl. This is not the first time he has 'dated a girl', he has hand girls on his laps or whatever- what is a back hug? I think people need to stop defining Jikook's lives by their own standards. If a backhug is intimate to you. Thats you. If you think a grown ass man cannot hang out with a female friend, that's equally you.

You think if he thought it was inappropriate and risky he would do it 'in public?' Get with Kpop Idol dating culture. Lmho.

Do you know the lengths they go through to keep their relationships a secret? Especially non celebrity girlfriends? Chen from EXO got married and where is his wife? They keep their flings tighter than Trump keeps his toupee on his head. Lol.

They hide them not out of shame but out of love and the need to protect their loved ones. These idols have family members who have their restaurants and businesses shut down because they want to keep their privacy.

You think JungKook's girlfriend would- on her own, issue a statement regarding a scandal that Jungkook's agency had specifically directed her and her shop to keep quiet about and lay low till it blew away on its own? And later, started liking couple posts about her and JK? If they were dating, certainly JK would have dumped her after that move. In my opinion.

You think JK would let his fandom drag the person he is in a relationship with to the extent she loses her Job- when in his Itaewon gay pub scandal BigHit referred to the issue as his private affair immediately it happened? They could have kept the same energy with her, no?

They handled his gay pub scandal much better, with much respect and consideration for his privacy- if he dated her sorry but she mustn't have meant much to him at all. And if I were her I would have dumped him for that shit and not stay liking couple posts about us. Damn- But do you.

Taehyung was in a scandal with a girl too- did you see her liking posts and shit and going out of her way to do the most? Did you see how BigHit handled that scandal?

Nothing wrong if JK is 'dating' her or had 'dated' her and whatever person he decides he wants to be in a relationship with I will support him- that's why I support Jikook.

But your opinion is equally valid my guy. Just don't call me a charlatan for mine. You believe they dated, I believe they didn't- and to your impressionable young minds, I hope you are not selling them anything contrary to BigHit and JK's statement. That would be very irresponsible of you. Lol.

What else did you say?

Oh postulating without evidence...

Next time I write a theory based on my observations about Jikook, remind me to break off a piece of my brain and attach it to it- I guess that way people would finally understand when I say things like 'I think' 'in my opinion' 'I feel' 'I believe' that these are just my thoughts and opinions and not facts.

Let me leave you with this:

Peace and kindness. Namaste.

Signed,

GOLDY.

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in-tua-deep · 4 years

Text

tua s1 rewatch with my roommate

episode one (I forgot for the first episode oops):

I have been treated to pictures of a lovely cosplay of Klaus who won a cosplay contest my roommate was in !!

Klaus putting his arm in front of Five during the funeral fight is good shit

“I have heard like nothing about Vanya” “yeah that’s pretty much how she’s treated in show as well”

“I can see why he’s the fandom favorite” - about Klaus

“Istanbul is in the firST EPISODE?”

I forGOT about the “rapists can climb” line when he breaks into Vanya’s apartment omg but also like,, his dumb arm wound

Episode two:

HERR CARLSON

Aww baby fives first time travel his little smile. Baby. Baby boy. And the dawning horror in the apocalypse baby nO

Five: you got anything stronger

Also five: takes one sip and then fills up more, takes another sip, and then immediately puts it down ?????

The motel dude for hazel and cha cha just looks at them like “yeah these are serial killers” and just rolls with it

Also actually why tf doesn’t the commission spring for better stuff?? Why would they cut costs?? They time travel? They could game the stock market so hard ?????? Give the assassins their own rooms omg

Also why didn’t five like. Crush his tracker. Why did he just leave it whole and intact outside of the Griddys.

Forgot how much I love Agnes

(Oh man it is storming bad here it just BOOMED)

Also idk if Diego actually deserved that taser hmmmmm but also like,, communication lads five was literally right there killing people and Diego is like “hmm something is up here” like. Yeah Diego ur big brother “I can get my sibling in trouble for something” senses are tingling

Wow I really did repress all these Allison and Luther scenes huh. Also it’s still super cute that Allison read Claire moon books

Allison: dads heart gave out, which wasn’t how I was expecting to find out dad had a heart but it tracks

“SHUT YOUR PIEHOLE BEN... said with love 😘”

Did five actually sleep at Vanyas?? The sofa looks undisturbed but he had to wait for work hours to interrogate the meritech people,, five,, please sleep. The whole “IF YOU CALL ME YOUNG MAN ONE MORE TIME” interaction makes more sense with five on. Zero sleep.

I didn’t remember that Patch straight up knows about the umbrella academy oops. Like she clocks Diego as overcompensating for his childhood. Queen

Is that an umbrella adademy Diego cross stitch on Diego’s wall?? Did he buy that? Make it?? Did grace make it?

Vanya, walking into the academy: five??? five? pspspspspsps

Also like. Who was Vanyas therapist??? Clearly they did not help her

Aww the tow truck driver :(

I know the show wants me to dislike Patrick I KNOW,, and I think her fathers funeral is extenuating circumstance?? But still Patrick is valid for not giving an inch regarding his ex who mind controlled his child. Vanya didn’t really deserve Allison snapping at her but like. She had some good points. Allison arguably would have had to deal with vanyas book more than anyone else

Five smiling proudly at Klaus’s drama at meritech bless but also KLAUS DONT BREAK GLASS ON YOURSELF

Me, spotting Leonard: BASTARD

Love how everyone greets Diego in the gym and don’t question all his knives or anything like “yeah that’s Diego he lives here and loves knives :)”

Why could Leonard have not been like. A normal ass guy. Vanya needs friends who sympathize with her holy shit get this person some socialization

Pogo really did have to lead these kids by hand to the recording rooms because literally no one was super invested in reginalds ~murder mystery~

ahafahJAGSJWGAI MY ROOMMATE JUST SAID POGO IS THE BEST CHARACTER SO FAR,,,, I will probably never include pogo in my fics because I do Not Care About Him lmaoooo

Aww five does to see Dolores and being like “it’s been a rough couple of days :(“,,,,, baby,,,, but also tag yourself I’m hazel going “elastic wrist splint yesssssss”

Five I am begging you PLEASE get some sleep

OH FIVE SHAKING DIEGO IN THE APOCALYPSE TO TRY AND WAKE HIM UP OHHHHH OH :(

Episode 3:

my roommate is super faceblind which is an issue bc she identifies people mainly by hairstyle so seeing the s2 stuff on tumblr is tripping her over bc she keeps seeing diego and going ??? who is that again? bc she’s seen his longer hair

okay there is no way that the eggs that grace put in that pan are the ones that ended up on the smiley face breakfast plate,,, but also grace that whole scene was a mood honestly i would be like “okay maybe mom killed dad BUT he deserved it sooooo”

“what the FUCK” - my roommate about cha-cha’s shitty wound care where she holds a curling iron against her arm

i didn’t remember that five got shOT AT THE DEPARTMENT STORE did i just erase that from my memory?? i mean yeah it’s a graze but he stitches it up and then slaps a bandaid on it so he has a wound that needed stitches on his shoulder for the entire show ??????? is he okay???? that would make moving your arm,,, painful,,,,,

a bandaid just slapped over it i’m actively yelling

“Sometimes when I see a million gifs of a show before I watch I get really surprised when they talk but he is exactly what I expected” - my roommate, about five

“I noticed they’ve only really showed diego in really badly lit scenes so far” - my roommate defending her lack of ability to recognize diego

i’m still laughing about pogo literally having to point out the murder tapes and now allison and luther are investigating and just. allison is lowkey defending grace and i’m laughing

“why is he saying woodwork is embarrassing that’s like one of the most middle of the wood hobbies to have. you’re respectable to grandpas who used to carve wooden ducks AND twenty-year-olds who can’t make anything to save their lives” - my roommate on leonard peabody

“i think he’s already crossing some lines he’s met this lady ONCE” - roommate on leonard/vanya

five having flashbacks in the car :(

did allison and luther draw straws for who went to fetch which sibling?? allison was like “dibs on vanya” and luther was just like “aww :(”

five luther and klaus in the van - BOYS NIGHT BOYS NIGHT let’s go pick up diego

“the coat he’s wearing does have a nice swish to it” - roommate about klaus’s coat

luther being like “you’re just as messed up as the rest of us and we’re all you have” like luther,,, baby,,,,, you literally ARE all he has,,,,,, his family is the only thing he’s really cared about since he was thirteen and maybe before then :(

“I can’t tell if those are supposed to be cake or yeast donuts... i think extruded donuts are cake donuts but she said she lets them rise so maybe they’re yeast?” - my roommate focusing on all the things that i do not

sometimes i forget that hazel and cha-cha pretended to be private detectives trying to find a lost child in a potentially dangerous situation,,, five would be disgusted

“she shouldn’t get a vote” “i was gonna say i agree with you” “she should get a vote!!” this is peak sibling energy honestly i think i’ve had that exact interaction with my siblings voting for a movie or something

“hashtag android rights”

“I want to be the tailor who gets a call one day that says ‘i want you to make clothes for a chimpanzee”

is it telling that only luther in the flashback didn’t really talk to grace at all,, i mean five didn’t either but i think he was gone by that point in the flashback ????

wait diego tells grace that she worked for him for thirty years,,, the kids are 29 and later it’s implied she was built bc vanya kept killing nannies when they were like four but maybe s2 clarifies that some more?? or diego just is rounding up

“that’s an interesting fabric to her skirt” - my roommate about grace’s outfit

forgot that hazel and cha cha broke the door to the manor busting in,, do they ever fix that?? we’re only at episode three do they spend the rest of the season with their door open to anyone on the streets

okay that bathtub is WAY too small to allow for klaus to be moving his elbows about like that underwater smh

“how is HE useful on mission??” my roommate about klaus

where is the SECURITY SYSTEM??? luther LITERALLY said that reggie was more paranoid and yet some assassin can just bust down the door and have unrestricted access????? he built a whole ROBOT but no security system????????

“maybe it was like,, practice for the kids? someone breaks in and they take care of it? wait no that doesn’t explain the thirteen years they’ve been gone?”

“why WAS he on the moon?” - about luther

“I want to see what she’s embroidering!!” about grace during the gunfight in the living room she’s absolutely ignoring diego getting shot at

what is a rope-a-dope,,,, diego yells “EVER HEARD OF A ROPE-A-DOPE???” at luther but like. no i haven’t. what does that MEAN diego

aww i forgot they played sinnerman, love that song

“what are you doing dude, rumor has it you’re not shooting at me that’s all you need to do” i mean. the roommate is not wrong. allison could just end the fight with a yell. i understand she’s pissed off and has rumor trauma but like cha cha is actively trying to murder them

how is luther not winning he literally has super strength. does hazel have super strength? just punch the man and knock him out jesus y’all suck at this smh

why is there such intense music we all been knew about luther’s strength - oH HIS BODY

forgot about that

is it allison’s fault that klaus got kidnapped because she didn’t literally just rumor them to give up?? like she literally has that power. she could have been like “i heard a rumor you left and forgot about us” it didn’t even need to be violent?? i understand she has rumor trauma but this i feel is allowable circumstances

diego showing his worry about vanya by getting angry which honestly i think all the siblings do that rip none of these idiots have even heard of healthy communication in their LIVES

you know,, i don’t think vanya can drive. she takes the bus. she took a taxi to leonard’s house. we see her walking a lot. does she know how to drive?? i imagine that the umbrella academy were taught bc of mission related stuff but,,, vanya wasn’t?? that’s just depressing tbh

#tua rewatch #i cannot beliEVE she likes pogo so much #pogo was complicit in the hargreeves abuse no i wont change my mind #i would be more likely to forgive him if he didnt keep mentioning how much reginald loved them #pogo fam dont say that #youre just going to feed luthers daddy issues #more to come #i cannot BELIEVE i forgot five got shot/grazed in the arm by a bullet #he slaps a BANDAID OVER IT #right after i said five is better at woundcare than cha cha with the curling iron #he just #slaps a bandaid on it #not even a big bandaid #that motherfucker

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ganondoodle · 4 years

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ooo i love em both!! what's their relationship with each other? do they like each other? hate each other?

i assume you’re talking about that sketch i posted a few minutes ago- well, you know me, they’re gonna be a couple later on (but still in the earlier pats) in the story of my original comic “Timeless Spirits”, which i am also writing (its a much much bigger project than the zelda fancomic so its gonna take a long while until i can actually start it) Shargon is a pretty insecure and silent Spirit (and parent of two kids) who is also the King of the few spirits that remain (its a long story so im sparing you the details), the other spirits dislike him alot bc he is not good at fighting (which is required to be good king tm in their society) so he usually hangs out in the human world rather than the spirit world, since everyone regards him as being useless but in the human world he can at least sneak around and enjoy a life a little bit. Zaphira is the Empress of the second biggest Nation in the human world, when she was young she used to start wars left and right, conquered country after country, but when she grew older wanted to change her ways; the death of her wife in the last war she fought was the last straw for her and so shes now trying to make up for her past mistakes (shes over 70 years old), which is kind of hard since most people living in the conquered countries absolutely hate her (which is also why she almost cant leave the capital city bc assassins are everywhere). shes still an overconfident fighting machine with a personality that reminds me of Dora from castle in the sky actually xD the plot gets started when Zaphira is sick of the rumors of a demon residing in an abadoned shrine near the capital city which is causing trouble for anyone traveling there/merchants, so she decides to go and investigate it herself since everyone else is too scared to go there, turns out in the shrine lives an old carpenter and war veteran from another country that fled there, he tries to lie that he was the one spreading the rumors of a demon here to make sure noone finds him. Zaphira is supicious of that and stay there for several days until Shargon actually shows up, and she promptly asks him if he’d liked to be her bodyguard bc he scares literally everyone away just by being there, so all he has to do is follow her around and shes pretty much save from attacks~

this got longer than i intended and im note sure if this is a good answer to your question ;__; anyways they’re a power couple tm, dont judge me pls ;__;

#ganondoodles answers #weewooo oc police #and longer rambling #sssorry #isk how much you already knew #since anonymous and all #but uh ye #i got a ton of ocs #just dont get to draw them all #;___;

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hela-avenger · 4 years

Text

poison & wine- part 12

Author: hela-avenger

Word Count: 1271

Summary: Prince Loki of Asgard is in need of a date to take back home. That’s where you come in with a task of your own to make the whole trip with an insufferable prince worth it. Too bad that things don’t always go as planned and you end up giving more than you can take. Fake-Dating AU.

A/N: Sorry for the impromptu hiatus. I just needed a break for a hot minute. Please let me know if you’ll like to be tagged!

“You must tell us everything,” Lynn exclaimed as she took the seat next to you. Loki had a seating area by a magnificent fireplace. It was embellished in his colors as everything in his room was and though you weren’t a fan of the color scheme you had to admire the intimate detail in everything. “Once we heard about your courtship, we’ve been dying to know about every single detail.”

“The prince said you would be a bit shy at announcing your relationship with him,” Datya pipes in as she dropped to sit on the other side of you. “But now that we know everything makes so much sense.”

“How so?” you asked a bit confused.

“You spoke of him with such a casualness that no one ever has,” Datya answers.

“Yes! You are unafraid of his mischievous behavior and his title. The prince has finally met his match with you,” Lynn adds on. “Now go on, tell us how you came to fall for the prince. How did you meet? How long have you been together? Does his tongue serve any other purpose beside spreading lies?”

You can’t help but laugh at the last question. As much as you wanted to offer some answers, you knew better than to string a story now. The lie that Loki had planted was too fresh for you to start embellishing it suddenly. As if sensing your hesitancy, Iana steps out of the closet from where she was previously working in.

“Lynn!” Iana reprimands shooting the young girl a glare. She turns to look at you apologetically. “We are very happy for you, Lady Y/N, and we wish for you eternal happiness, but...”

You look up at her nervously and wonder what kind of reprimand she has set for you. Iana had been hard to read since you first met her so you didn’t know which direction the conversation may take.

“...King Odin holds no regard for Midgard. There is a chance he will reject the courtship.”

You have to restrain from laughing because that wasn’t an issue you had expected to hear. It was nice to know that there might be a loophole in all of this but your end of the deal wouldn’t be fulfilled if you didn’t continue on with the fake courtship.

“Right, well…” you sigh out with a shrug. “That is a matter between the king and the prince. I never meant for our relationship to be mixed with politics so if that issue arises we will deal with it accordingly.”

“Spoken like a true princess,” Datya comments with a grin. “Oh my, you will make such a great queen!”

“The first mortal Queen of Asgard!” Lynn continues with the same excitement. “Imagine all of the stories and tales that would be written in your honor...”

“Girls,” Iana interrupts, sending them a sharp glance. “That’s enough now. We have much to do.”

Lynn and Datya are quick to rise and start to work once more. Iana offers you one last parting glance and you can tell she’s apologizing for something that isn’t her fault.

The courtship was false but the girls had brought up certain scenarios that you hadn’t expected to hear. Though you suspected that Loki had no intention of letting this fake courtship end with an engagement. Yet, you knew there were things he was leaving out but you expected that this wasn’t one of them.

Or at least you hope it wasn’t.

And just as things couldn’t get worse, a knock on the door pulls you out of your thoughts. You move to stand and answer it but Lynn was more than happy to drop her recent task to assist. Few words are spoken and Lynn returns with a message meant for you.

“It’s Queen Frigga,” she states. “She wishes to speak to you.”

Loki was no stranger to the pointed stares and hushed whispers that uttered his name when he entered the royal courtyard. Many lords and their wives were milling around hoping to gain some favor from the Allfather but Loki knew it was pointless. Odin was far too busy to care for the relationships within his kingdom. There were far more pressing alliances to keep outside of Asgard for his father to tend to the ones within his home.

But that certainly didn’t mean the king was blind to the occurences within his sight. Odin’s ever watchfulness of his court was proven by Loki’s sudden summoning to court to have an audience with him.

The prince walked past the gossiping court and entered the private throne room only to be greeted with a glaring Odin who sat on his golden throne.

Loki could only grin in amusement.

“Odin, for what reason have you called this meeting?” Loki asks with faux innocence.

“You know for what reason,” Odin answers simply. “You’ve created quite the scene earlier this morning. The court has yet to stop talking about it.”

“Ah, I’m sure those are simply rumors,” Loki brushes off.

“I’m certain they are not,” Odin states. “For the mortal is now being moved to rest in your chambers as we speak. Am I wrong?”

Loki remains silent and simply looks around the throne room as an attempt to avoid the question.

“What are you playing at, Loki?” Odin demands. “Bringing the mortal into royal affairs?”

“I’m not playing at anything,” Loki snaps. “I am courting her.”

“I can see that or your attempt to make it appear that way.”

“Why must you always insist I’m lying?”

“Because you are not the God of Truths,” Odin remarks. “You are the God of Lies and Mischief and this sudden courting of this mortal has your signature mockery all over it. So tell me, how did you coerce her into agreeing to this lie? Did you bribe her? Did you threaten her?”

“I am not lying,” Loki states. “For once, I speak the truth.”

Odin takes note of the dejected expression on Loki’s face. It was convincing enough to make him second guess himself.

“The timing of it all seems too convenient,” Odin points out. “We just spoke yesterday of the new requirement of the throne and then you go on and do this.”

“Yes, I am aware,” Loki sighs out convincingly, keeping up the pretenses of being humble. “I had no intention of revealing my relationship with the Lady Y/N but you made this new demand and I feared you would invite the first Vanir princess you could get your hands on and pawn her off to me.”

Odin was not at all happy at the revelation. He was still convinced that this was all a trick. Not only was the timing of this revelation suspicious, but Loki’s relationship with the accompanying mortal was meant to irritate him which it did.

“I do not know how you spend your time in Midgard, nor do I really care for it,” Odin declares. “But if you insist that this courtship of yours has developed to such an advanced state with Lady Y/N, then I trust you can prove it to be true to me for the rest of your stay here in Asgard.”

“It is true,” Loki lies under his breath.

“Sure it is,” Odin mocks with a chuckle. “If that is the case then you should have no trouble courting to the standards we have here in the court of Asgard which means…”

Loki lets out a sigh knowing what was coming up next and how unprepared he was for it.

“I’ll like to formally meet her as your partner and give her my blessing.”

poison & wine tag: @damalseer @just-the-hiddles @jessiejunebug @nonsensicalobsessions @smollest-soybean @assassinoftheworld @readerbandit @doyoufeelikeayounggod @strangemcuvlogs @ha-tep @i-dont-know-eiither @gene-king @day-dreaming-fox @bn-studies @is-it-madness @sigyn-njorddottir @devilbat @victor-criss-bish

Loki Tag: @unicorniorosacomefrutillas @thesilentbluesparrow @oddly-drawn-muse @josiehosiedaninja @hp-hogwartsexpress @sadwaywardkid @wolf-lover74

All Works Tag: @jmb959 @astudyoftimeywimeystuff @hellocookiecutter @steve-rogers-personal-hell @buckybarnesyard @not-zari-tak

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meanminyxrd · 3 years

Text

therefore i am but make it kevin day

alright here’s another song analysis for y’all. it’s kind of a jumble of thoughts, but maybe you’ll get joy outta it.

the song we are evaluating is ‘therefore i am’ by billie eilish. i think it’s a really good song for kevin @ riko. listening to it, i’m sure you’d get why, but i’m going to be extra and explain.

WARNING! will contain spoilers to the series (obvs)

let’s start from the top:

I'm not your friend

Or anything, damn

You think that you're the man

I think, therefore, I am

I'm not your friend

Or anything, damn

You think that you're the man

I think, therefore, I am

according to genius lyrics, this chorus means: “Billie confronts the people who want to control her and makes it clear that she has no regard for other people’s opinions about her.”

so it’s kevin after he’s finally escaped and if riko hadn’t died right after the game. it’s kind of like, a ‘what if’ of if they’d had to continue interacting.

he isn’t rico’s friend, brother, pet; anything. he is no longer forced to be tied to riko. “you think that you’re the man” could also be construed as everyone, including riko himself, seeing riko as ‘the king of the court’.

“i think, therefore, i am.” this part, again according to genius lyrics, is coined from Descartes. Descartes argued that even if we are skeptical about the existence of our physical body and environment, the self-conscious of mind still inevitably exists as “we cannot doubt of our existence while we doubt.”

to me this is a strong reminder to kevin that without riko, he is still someone. he still matters. he doesn’t need riko to succeed. he’s been part of a team for so long i’m not sure he remembers how to be his own person. but he’s learning. he belongs to this earth as the earth belongs to him.

Stop, what the hell are you talking about? Ha

Get my pretty name out of your mouth

We are not the same with or without

Don't talk 'bout me like how you might know how I feel

Top of the world, but your world isn't real

Your world's an ideal

i have no doubt that riko would spit countless bullshit to kevin to try to manipulate him into coming back, (he does it in the books and also most likely would have if he lived afterwards), not to mention lots of rumors would be spread by riko to try and tear kevin down. for instance, the fact that kevin’s hand was broken in a ‘skiing accident.” since we come from the perspective of neil, we know this isn’t true. however, the rest of the world doesn’t know that. so it’s like, “stop. what the hell are you talking about? literally none of this is true.” ie when he says he’s never gone skiing, but would like to someday. “get my pretty name out of your mouth and stop spreading rumors. with or without exy, we are not the same person. don’t talk to me like you understand how i feel, because you don’t.” (like at the interview). “you’re caught up in your own delusion. you’re on top of the world, but your world isn’t real. your world’s an ideal.” the “perfect court” that riko is striving for is simply that; an ideal. something he wants but would never in reality happen.

So go have fun

I really couldn't care less

And you can give 'em my best, but just know

he is finally letting go of the power riko had over him. he is letting riko go. he couldn’t care less what riko does, says, even fucking thinks anymore. the ‘and you can give ‘em my best’ could refer to him saying “oh ya say hi to the mafia for me’ lol, like a jab. sassy queen, we love him.

I don't want press to put your name next to mine

We're on different lines, so I

Wanna be nice enough, they don't call my bluff

'Cause I hate to find

Articles, articles, articles

Rather you remain unremarkable (Got a lotta)

Interviews, interviews, interviews

When they say your name, I just act confused

obviously this whole “splitting up the two exy stars” thing has spread all over the media; that’s why the ravens are able to switch districts. everyone wants to see them ‘fight’ one another on the court. but kevin LEFT. he isn’t a part of riko anymore. “dont want press to put your name next to mine.” the whole point is that kevin day is not #2 anymore, he is his own person. he is no longer defined by a number. #2 is no longer his personality but a number on a jersey; that’s it. “we’re on different lines,” they’ve always been on opposite sides even on the same court, always battling to be the best (yet it always falling to riko by default) but they’re finally on different teams. they have always been on metaphorical different lines, but this time, it’s actual different line ups. “so i wanna be nice enough, they don’t call my bluff” he acts so civil on kathy’s show even though he is literally shaking in fear because he was terrified more of what would happen if news got out. he wants to be nice and polite enough so that the audience doesn’t catch on that something is wrong. he hates to see articles written about them, hates to answer questions about them, because he wants to let go of riko. he doesn’t want his abuser haunting his recovery. “rather you remain unremarkable,” it would be so much easier, though, if riko wasn’t so popular. (then he dies but you know how it goes.)

I'm sorry

I don't think I caught your name

I'm sorry

I don't think I caught your name

i love love LOVE this part. i think it could be such a powerful line to kevin’s growth. riko is now insignificant to him. riko has no part in kevin’s life anymore. kevin can finally heal and become his own person. the ‘i don’t think i caught your name.’ strikes me as a sassy way of saying he doesn’t even remember riko, because riko is that forgettable. he can’t even remember that dumb man’s name.

so that’s it really, lmk ur thoughts!

btw, here’s my kevin playlist if ur looking for more songs i associate with kevin (: make sure to check my pinned post if u want more aftg character playlists!

#aftg #all for the game #kevin day #riko moriyama #therefore i am #billie eilish #song analysis

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araisbored · 3 years

Text

Obelisk

That’s the only quirky title I could come up to make this a little bit more interesting.

I’m reviewing my favorite book again. More like making another post about it. Because I seem like the type of person to not shut up about something she truly, truly, deeply love. Though, I won’t really making a review. Because I am in no state to make one of those. I don’t know I just I’m not that qualified to that yet. Though I read millions of books, I still won’t. I re-read my last “review” and it just make me cringe because I can’t understand what I’m saying and there’s a bunch of errors on my sentence. Not that this whole post won’t containing grammar errors, but still. Also, the cringing intensifies when I saw that Jennifer Niven (the author of this book) liked my bizarrely wrong blog entry. Ms. Niven, if by any chance, reading this again, I love your work and I’m sorry for a lot of grammatical errors. Ms. Niven, your work changed my life and help me get through a rough time. Sounds cliché but its the truth.

To repeat what I typed, I won’t make a review. Yet, I’ll post a very private diary log which where I somehow discuss my opinions about this book. So here it is.

Trigger warning: Suicide topics, cutting and mental issues might come up on the next following paragraph. And it’s really graphic. Because it is a personal log on my digital diary. Beware.

May 17, 2019: Theodore’s death, Avengers: End game and GoT discussion.

I never had a proper review of this book. Because lets be real here. Its me and probably won’t matter. Last time or more like last last year, I made a book recommendation/favourites about this book. And I emphasize on that blog post that it’s not a book review. NOT A BOOK REVIEW. At all.

Because:

I am scared of the internet scrutinizing my opinions and views about this book.

It’s about mental health or part of it. So it is really a sensitive topic and I even haven’t figured myself out. So I’m not really sure if I’m the right person you want to have an opinion regarding with this topic. One thing about me is that you don’t go asking me questions on how you figured your life or how you deal with depression because, oh boy oh boy you’re in a wrong place honey.

Last night I searched Theodore Finch on twitter. Yes, twitter. Because that is where you get the real opinions. Real tea. As well as the stupid ones. And I read one thread or whatever you call it, some sort of a conversation or replies from one girl to another. (I just assumed you’re girl and I’m sorry if you’re not. I am really sorry for misgendering you.) The other girl said that she’s kind of annoyed how everyone around Theodore doesn’t get the signs when it’s literally on their faces. When you come to think of it. Its true. All the signs of Theodore’s disease was there. Bluntly on their faces. It’s kind of fascinating how it’s not noticed by his family and friends or even Violet. But again right now thinking about it, maybe because it happened when this world just slowly noticing or paying attention about mental health. Hold a second, let me search when it was published. Yeah, I'm right its 2015. A year of coming of age for the late Baby Boomers are introduced to depression and when people, mostly teenagers are committing suicide. I would be very harsh on my words because it was just me talking to myself anyways. So yeah, that's also the year where I'm cutting myself and wanted to kill myself. So no wonder Finch’s family have no idea about his mishaps and adventures. So about that discussion, it was already solved. That year was just the year where naïve people are introduced to mental health and issues. Anyways, back to that conversation. The other girl defended the book/author. That the author, Jenifer Niven, was just portraying real life happenings. That these things happens in real life. People really die because of mental health issues. By the way, Finch mental diagnosis wasn’t really mentioned on the book directly. As far as I can remember. That’s why I'm re-reading it again now. But so far zero mentioned of diagnosis or bipolarity(Is that even a word? idc.). Just the mention of him wanting to kill himself, the erotic changes in his moods, lack of appetite and being insomniac. He doesn’t sleep one night or he sleeps then have very bad nightmares after that. It’s pretty obvious but again, let’s refer to the points given above. Oh, oh! Then there’s one time he repainted his bedroom from blood red to blue. If that’s not alarming enough then idk anymore. But yes, 2015. The coming of age and the year where we birthed more stupid late boomers. But, yes. Wild book. A very wild and very BRILLIANT book. It’s the stupid characters or the people in Finch’s life that suck. Which is why I kind of sided to the girl who said that that the author doesn’t really write the characters well. Let’s call her Girl A. And the other girl who defend Niven, Girl B. I’m pretty sure you’re both girls but just in case, I’m gonna apologize again if I'm misgendering you. Or if you don’t wanna be called a girl. I can’t say or disclose that Girl B was wrong because he clearly have a point too. It happens in real life. People die from depression and I might be one soon.

Just wanna say that It’s a good discourse. Arguments like that are my favorites where both sides are not wrong nor right either, makes you really think. A read. Both the book and that twitter discourse. If you happened to read it, good. But if not sorry I can’t link it for you.

So for my opinion (oh no, here we go) I agree on both of them , as if its not yet obvious. I guess if it was written in the present days the author could’ve change the characters and made Finch alive. Or checked-in in a mental institution or he’ll be given a medical assistance he really needs. Because the only medical attention he was given was thru his Guidance councilor, Embryo. Which is a good thing, but also I think Finch’s situation needs more professional attention. No offence to all guidance councilors out there. I know you guys try your best. But you know, Niven can make Finch visit a psychiatrist in a clinic/mental institution right? Like violet. I know Finch’s financial state is bad but.. idk there’s something can be done here. But again it was during that time where people are shouting “Depression isn’t real”, stupid people posting tweets and Facebook status on how “Suicide is for the week”; they watch 13 reasons why and decided to skip the whole point of the show and just assumed that “yeah depression is for the weaklings”. It only shows how ignorant people are. They’re the kind of people who standby when you get punch on the face or laugh when people spreads rumors and lies about you. Basically, bystanders. I’m sorry I’m a little snappy. If you haven’t noticed. I don’t know I’m just mad today.

I think the book still holds it. And justify the ending. Though part of me really hate it too. But it kind of made me realized about a lot of things, not just about me but also about how I should interact with other human beings. I hate the ending because it breaks my heart but I guess it was necessary?? Or not. Any how, It was a good ending. Maybe its just me because I’m a masochist. But I can not think of any other impactful and realistic way on ending it. (Rereading this again and I just need to clear things up. That IM NOT A MURDERER OR A KILLER. I DONT NORMALIZE SUICIDE, but from a standing point the ending is justified. Its sad but its, again, realistic.) But still, breaks my heart, Theodore is a precious boy. Who deserves nothing but love. And I hope his story was more known by the people so jackasses would know how to treat their family and friends better.

[This part was cut because I talked about Avengers and GoT ending; Which is very relevant to this topic]

Love,

Ara xx

So yeah, that’s some of my diary entry. Re-reading it makes me realized how funny I am. Jesus I should read more of these. Who knows, I might post it here. If it’s not that personal. I’ll end this here now. I hope wherever you are you’re having a good day.

Ttyl, Ara!

#books #jennifer niven #All the Bright Places

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isitandwonder · 5 years

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i go back and forth with, yea the dude is dating this girl, so what. to wow its kinda funny all this is happening now right around the release of their movie. and the editor or whatever of cmbyn says that yesterday and today theyre wandering around together and shes wearing his shirt. idk, maybe its both their together and their playing it up. or its all fake. or its real. dont get it lol best to keep it light tho and realize the only real love is btwn him and armie lolol

Oh,nonnie, you asked (or maybe not lol):

What is truth? That question is keeping philosophers going since the old Greeks. Can we ever know what another person truely thinks and feels? What do we really know about people we interact with personally? We live in our cave and stare at shadows. So how can we assume anything about people we really don’t know at all?

Well, there are a few approaches. One is that you admit that you know nothing, that everything you believe (not know) is made up in your head anyway, so you can built YOUR OWN FANTASY. And it’s nothing wrong with that, as long as you stay aware that IT IS A FANTASY. You can’t prove or disprove a fantasy because it’s all in your head anyway, it’s highly subjective and made up.

And we are not curing cancer here, this is fun, so believe what you want if it helps you getting on with your life.

And isn’t it nice if you write or draw about THIS FANTASY and post it in fan spaces and find likeminded people with similar FANTASIES and you share them and a fandom grows and everyone has fun and is happy?

So, if, in this regard and context, for you, A&T are the greatest love story that ever happened, or LRD&T are the greates love story that ever happened, or Tim is secretly a shapeshifter, or a vampire, or is boning Glen Close - FINE! Knock yourself out. Believe what you want. Only, don’t insult or ridicule those who SHIP/dream/believe something else. Because no ship (aka FANTASY) is better than the other and there’s no truth to be found in a FANTASY. You either believe it or not and believe something else. It’s totally subjective and - as a FANTASY- there’s nothing wrong with that.

Trying to prove a fantasy is what leads to insanity. Believe me, it’s not that I wasn’t tempted at one point. Only, you know, I’m a scientist. And in science, when we start an experiment, we have a question or an assumption that we want to prove, not already an answer.

Because I don’t have to prove something that I know is true. You still with me? When I start to look for clues that A&T are together, lead by my knowledge (not assumption or question if) that they are together, of course I will only prove what I started with in the first place and ignore/disregard everything that speaks against my knowledge because I’ve known the truth from the beginning and will produce a narrative accordingly. This is called confirmation bias.

In that context, even the absence of proof is proof for something - and at this point, you can’t argue with people who work like this because they have made their mind up long before they entered the argument. They had the answer before the question. For them, there isn’t an argument at all, because they KNOW. End of story.

True, sometimes the dog NOT barking is evidence. But for that to work there has to be a dog in the first place. If you don’t know that there is a dog, it not barking proves nothing.

So, again, can’t we know anything about anything? Well, there’s a thing called probability. Not all arguments are equally valid, some are more reasonable than others because we have experience, context, and from that we draw conclusions re the probability of things.

But lets first look at the evidence presented in favour of certain theories. I’ve been on this train for over 2 years. I saw a lot of the things going round in fandom and taken as proof for or against something now as it happened - and I have to say, many things got taken out of context and were blown up to much more proportian and meaning than at the time things happened. Pics have been cut in certain ways so people have been removed to make them look more intimate. Things no one has ever seen or knows anything about are suddenly taken as facts (a marriage contract, for example) just because they’ve been repeated so often by fans that they’ve been talked into existing.

These proofs are often photographic ‘evidence’. But pictures lie. And can be manipulated. What we see in them depends on lighting, angels etc. If you take a pic or vid out of context it can look as if it shows something totally different than it originally did. So never base anything solely on a single picture you didn’t even take yourself. Always ask for the context it has been taken in. Is it a fan snapshot? Is it a directed photoshoot? Has it been made during an official promo event? These things matter to determine the validity of the things show in these pictures.

For example, look at this:

Isn’t that a lovely pic of A&T? Doesn’t T look totally shagged out, bathing in the afterglow while Armie tells the world: ‘Look, he is mine!’ This is the photo as I saw it on tumblr.

This is the original:

As you can see, Tim is probably laughing at something Petra Collins says to him. This changes the whole context. And these things happened quite often in the early days because we were shippers, we knew that we were wearing our shipper goggles, we spun a FANTASY, quite aware that what we were doing was playing freely with the facts. It wasn’t about proving something, it was about illustrating a fantasy. Taking these things now as proof for anything is absurd.

Same goes for interviews. These can be cut and edited in certain ways. Watch a whole press conference, not just the part your shipper heart loves if you want to get the whole picture (or live in the one sentence that makes your shipper heart flutter if this is just about your FANTASY).

As said in the beginning: no one on here knows these people and their circumstances. We didn’t even go to school with them, worked with them, or are their neighbours or in any direct contact with them whatsoever. So we base our judgement solely on currated content provided by them or people close to them, and public appearances that happen in a certain context like a movie premiere, and on very random public sightings by people we also don’t know and whose statements we can’t verify.

We can’t really built anything about their private lives upon these things, can we? It’s all highly speculative.

Okay, after having discussed the reliability of our evidence, lets move on to how to sort it. There is this thing called probability. In theory, everything is equally likely over an infinite period of time. But in reality, humans are able to learn from experience. And experience teaches us that some things are more likely than others.

Then there are facts. Facts are things we know to be true because they haven’t been falsified yet. For example, Armie is married. I know, there are many rumors going around about the state of his marriage, but as long as he’s not publicly divorced he got publicly married to EC and that’s the only thing we can work with. Otherwise, our already pretty sketchy footing slips away completely if we only work with hearsay, specualtion and gossip, and we end up with a fantasy again.

So, in our case: do we really think that friends, family, spouses, girlfriends, colleagues, ex-colleagues, ‘the press’ and random people on the internet are all conspiring since June 2016 together to hide that two actors - who to large parts of the world are totally unknown - are in a relationship, when, on the other hand, we have photographic evidence from multiple independent sources - and in Armie’s case even a marriage certificate and 2 children - showing that they are both with someone else?

Okay, but we’ve discussed the unreliability of photos. True. But it’s not just one cropped pic showing T with LRD. There are many, taken over a long period, by different people, professionally and privately. That makes them being a fact much more probable because why should all these people, who took those pics and reported sightings and don’t know each other and do gain nothing from their lies, lie? Isn’t it much more probable that what these pics show us is the truth?

On the other hand, what solid evidence do we have that A&T are a couple? We don’t even have one photo showing them kissing outside of a movie they made together 3 years ago. Compare this to pap and private pics of T&LRD kissing, that have been taken over a period of a year by different people. What does probability tell us here? That something we’ve never seen is more likely to be happening than something we’ve seen on different occasions, documented by different people independently for 12 months?

Isn’t it more likely that a man who’s never been seen out in public romantically involved with another man, who is married for years and has 2 children - is straight?

Isn’t it more likely that another man, who’s never been seen out in public romantically involved with another man either, who’s only other relationship the public knows of was with a girl, who - if he talks about his private life at all - talks about kissing a girl or wanting to impress a girl, who’s been photographed at different occasions by different people kissing a girl - is straight?

Leave aside what you want them to be and look at the facts, as sketchy as they are.

If you look seriously at what little facts we have - there is nothing reliable connecting A&T romantically that can’t be explained by them being friends and having filmed a movie together over 3 years ago. Everything else is subjective, projection, hearsay, wishful thinking, a fantasy, shipping, gossip, rumors.

Documented facts show us that their reality is incongruent with our ship. And if we start to disregard those facts it leads to sending hate to these very people because fans who took a ship for something real feel betrayed. So, please, sort facts from fantasy, take a look at the facts (not at projection, hearsay, wishful thinking, a fantasy, shipping, gossip, rumors) and draw your own conclusion.

What do you think is more probable when you look at proven facts? Probable, not true. There’s the possibility that I might get proven wrong someday. But, to me, all real evidence points towards T&LRD and AH&EC.

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stargazinggirk · 5 years

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In response to PR, Lucy and Rami

Since another post directly referencing mine has been going around I’d thought I’d just clear up one of two points I guess I hadn’t well enough the first time around.

One I like Lucy and Rami both very much. If they are now dating or end up dating I’d be very happy. The man is 38 years old he deserves life partner or wife. And Lucy does too because we all deserve to be happy and loved. I shall never ever in a million years get the chance to meet or date either of them so why should I hate them if they are together? Why be jealous? if Lucy is the one than good she doesn’t seem like a bad or evil person she just seems highly career driven. Just like Rami was in his youth but when a woman show cases that we tend to cast her in a negative light that we don’t on men. That was the motivation for my post but I felt in order to express that I also needed to share what I have come to believe is the truth. Which is that the relationship is or mostly has been a PR stunt. Not talking about that fact felt wrong to me.

The reason for the PR stunt I gave was the nicest out of the three. Which was award season a little googling should explain that or maybe in the future I’ll write a non Rami related cliff notes post on how award season works in Hollywood and the millions of dollars that go into it and why. Because Oscars are still star makers and cash cows ( Bri Larson, Octavia spencer A24, Weinstein anyone) There are two other rumors flying but I don’t feel like they have enough ground or proof to bother writing about.

I came under fire for posting this as it was viewed as an attack on both actors privacy. Which depending on your definition of a public figure could very well be true. I’d normally agree 100% with that poster on this fact. It’s why I’ve with held my knowledge on their relationship and the PR rumors under wraps for sometime and the word in Hollywood till they made it quite clear that they are out in the public like this together and those public actions and comments in blogs,red Carpet interviews and speeches can be discuss and used as a point of reference. When you sit court side though you can get free tickets for more private places you want to be seen and don’t want privacy.

As for breaking rami’s privacy about the PR stunt it’s kinda all over and joked at among those close to a certain part of his inner circle. There isn’t much privacy left to be had. Why do you think almost right after it seemed like they were dating that there was a huge surge in people claiming it’s PR. No one claimed that when it Timmee and Lily Rose because Hollywood had known they were dating for months. No one within a ten foot radius of there social circle was shocked because it had always been tastefully known. There was no doubt they were a real couple. People date their co stars all the time and PR stunt rumors never spread because there is no grounds for it. It’s a when there is smoke their is fire moment and so far none of the smoke has cleared it’s only gotten thicker.

His acting coach ( current or former haven’t gotten a clear answer on that) is openly talking about it with many. If anyone has betrayed rami’s privacy it’s her. But maybe she didn’t really because maybe it’s not a secret Rami is too hot on keeping as it’s spread pretty far and the PR team is making basic moves. Play book moves on all of it. Their biggest mistake was the golden globes mini melt down which they’ve been correcting ever since.

As for why the press doesn’t ask about if it’s PR stunt? Oh my word. You do know how press for actors work right? It’s not journalists actors speak with. Their talking heads. Literally that’s what they are not so nicely referred to as because that’s their job. reps pick the questions. Anyone who is going to interview an actor is sent a list of no go questions and then submits their questions back so the actor can prep their answer. Why else do you think Live Aid is the main talking point of so many interviews? It’s been preplaned to be brought up. Also most of those people respect their guests and don’t want to shame them or make them uncomfortable by bringing up stuff they’ve been asked not to. It also a nice safety net if they get internet shamed for not asking questions. I couldn’t I was given orders not too.

So why doesn’t an interviewer break the rules? If you’re Ellen you can if you are a smaller red carpet person you get black balled. That PR team is never going on to let you speak to anyone of their stars again.

As for the London bffta comment which got mentioned in regards to my post rami is filming doctor doo little - or parts of it in London and possibly James Bond mostly at Pinewood in London. That sounds like a good reason especially given how much more layer back unhollywood like London is. Lucy could be a reason or it could be practical business investment most actors buy places where they film and then rent them out or make them over and sell them for a much higher price ( Angela Jolie’s Budapest short lived Budapest rel estates love affair anyone)

Look was my making the post or even the post the smartest choice of my life no. But the lack of understanding around Hollywood especially when it’s so easy to read the trades and follow key people on Twitter kills me.

So yes people of the internet doubt me. I am hidden behind a screenname and while I’ve made cases no solid proof has been offered. All I can encourage you to do if you want to argue or are curious is do research. Or better yet ask yourself what you are using to say if they are a couple or not. Or what you define as privacy. Or why you don’t like Lucy or don’t like rami or hate Hollywood. Think study learn and don’t consider not speaking on the internet till you can make sound well rounded response otherwise you are just adding to the noise.

And on a bottom bottom note time will tell us more about their relationship. How often she visits the mr robot set or hangs in New York how much he flies back to London over the 3 months after his Oscar win will let us know.

No they won’t break up right after. There will be a post Oscar honeymoon phase for at least a month and then Lucy is will slowly start a social media rebranding of sorts. Showing more of her life and career than she had before and rumors of power moves and the roles she is up for and in talks for will poor in. Then after about 3 months nothing 6 months they don’t be dating but with probably only one or two vague stories of them growing apart - but how successful they are either on E! Or entertainment tonight.

If none of the above follows then I was wrong and my sources mislead or mistaken and I shall be the first to congratulate Lucy and rami and cheers their loyalshippers. Because none of this is an attack against them it’s about the bs we force on movie stars as fans and what the industry does to them.

And on a petty note of this level of breaking down Hollywood and explaining all that I have at a university level with years of experience on this matter sounds like a 12 year old crap post out of jealousy to you then why are you on the tumblr fighting for moviestars honor when you clearly are too brilliant for the likes of this? Just saying that was a really dump attack against me and my credibility t - go on correct my English it’s not my first language nor my second.

#rami malek #fan page #actor #actress #lucy boynton #borap #pr #award season #gossip

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death-of-the-self · 6 years

Note

Are you the one who does Hide theories? If so why not make a last theory about Hide's and Kaneki's eye, just for fun? If you dont know what I mean, let me explain. In the sewers with Hide, that eye we see covered in shadows up in shown in this current chapter along with the text saying 'I always looked to you'. Hmm... I'm not explaining this well...

You got the right person if you were thinking of the one who drew Hide’s probable damage assessment.

These are the tg/re: theory / analysis page I have :

❂ Character Theories

Hide and Kaneki analysis for the end of times.

This is very likely my last ever tg/ tg re: analysis seeing as it’s coming to an end, and hopefully most things will be resolved /explained with the last chap or some type of afterword of Ishida’s.

As per usual this has a lot of Hide mentions.

At first I was confused by this, anon. Then I realized I hadn’t read the newest (Second to last chap) and now I get what you want me to talk about.It spiraled into a bigger analysis that I hope is engaging to anyone who happens to read it.

Topics :

Kaneki’s eyepatch being present during the Arima fight

When was the ghoul mask Hide gifts to Ken salvaged?

Hide’s inability to speak to Ken right before the Arima battle

Who is the voice behind “I’ve always looked to you..” Ken hears in 178 re:

Kaneki’s selfishness

Butterflies and Hide’s expression

What will likely happen in the last chap

Hide as a teruterubouzu

Hide’s likelihood of surviving mentally or physically

Sourcing chaps 134/136/ 138/139 of tg and 144/164/176/178 of tg re +

So, I went back and read into it.And checked to see if there was anything that could be analyzed.

Then I remembered, that there used to be a theory going around that Hide was speaking to Ken through some type of transmitter after the attack.

That he might have placed that eyepatch Ken suddenly shows up wearing to the Arima fight.

I’ll break that down based on what I see, but long story short, Hide didn’t put that on him.

The Eyepatch:

pre Amon fight : on

Post Amon fight : still on under the organic matter

During the sewer scene : On and off (to show anguish but not actually removed)

Right before Hide shows up: He takes it off himself during the

“i’m the one being consumed scene”

When he notices Hide : Organic mask back on but it can be assumed he dropped the actual mask in the sewage.

Which would make sense, Hide likely recovered that same mask he later on gifts him in re:

That mask though, also has the eyepatch it comes with attached.

And the one we see with Arima is different from what I can discern.

The moment Hide touches him : No sign of that ghoul mask or an eyepatch under.

The Hide pep talk:

We know what happened in the sewers between Ken and Hide in regards to damage, it messed with Hide’s face and vocal fold.

We also know for a fact, that Hide was not following Ken to his final destination.

The question now is?

The voice Ken heard.

Hide was unable to communicate with Ken, transmitter, or not, so this :

This is in Kaneki’s mind associating his own thoughts with those that Hide would likely say (see: Fantasy ‘you’re ripped’ Hide)

Hide managed to sneak a few lines in like those above, before the ‘kiss’.

Always looked to you…

When it comes to Ken’s human eye and seeking association with the eyepatch that appears out of the blue on Kens eye before the Arima fight.

While Kaneki is engulfed by the massive current of dead cells and likely silently drowning as the current pushes him down the path he climbed–

He hears a voice.

And right after we do, we see Touka looking out of the window, anticipating his return.

Now, my first thought was that it was somehow something off screen, Touka might have said to Ken.Which doesn’t add up knowing her behavior and dialogue pre sex.

But, then you might ask, who the heck would be saying that.

‘Always’ implies someone has been there prior to Kens ghoulification surgery.

It could be a part of himself speaking out to him, which, to me, would be underwhelming and a bit unecessary at this moment.

It would also imply Kaneki’s bastardized version of D.I.D was present as Kuroneki, which trauma noted would not be weird, but would not add up with what we know of Kaneki.

Ishida after-all fills the manga with foreshadowing.

chap. 144 re : Before he turns and kills many innocents and plays right into Furuta’s plan.

Losing the chance to imply that was a thing early on would be unlike what we see of his writing.

With only one chapter left, Hide being back and a big question-mark looming over who ‘kissed’ who in the sewers….

The idea that Hide was on his mind just like in the sewers would not be far fetched.

Possibilities :

A conversation off screen post reunion

A talk they had when they met in the sewers, a wonderful build up to the last chapter including said scene before it all gets resolved.

something that his rendition of Hide in his mind would do is not far fetched.

Kaneki will likely die and Hide is aware.

Chapter 178 shows us a butterfly twice.It looks like the sky has cleared and as though everything will go well when Saiko and Touka hold hands and hope to see Ken together.

However, this is a tragedy and we know things aren’t that simple.

The butterfly isn’t a simple of peace.In Japanese culture, amongst other meanings,

“Butterflies are closely linked with recently departed spirits”

and though that could be about Rize and or Furuta…

it could just be a death flag for the protagonist.

Tg re: has been rumored to be planned with a happy ending but what if the “happy” ending is for humanity and ghoulmanity and not for Kaneki himself?

What if Kaneki gets to die after securing offspring?

chapter 176 re:

The whole pregnancy / child shenanigan screams that to the reader, life will go on, history has and will likely repeat itself in small arcs that envelop bigger ones.

Human / Ghoul Peace has been momentarily achieved (thanks Hide and Furuta sorta) but other issues surely will arise.

Much like the non canon ending of the Root A anime, in which everyone in battle seized the fight as a ghoul held a human friend in his arms.

It’s a tragedy, it is very likely that Kaneki will die after having at least become aware of the damage he has done upon the country and his best friend.

chap. 164 re:

After finding a reason to live.

Having Hide facing away from the monitors, sweating and concerned instead of celebrating, towards what looks like the butterfly outside the building, is a bit telling.

As well as other scenes throughout the manga…

Additionally, Kimi seems concerned with what she has been monitoring, it might have to do with Kaneki’s rc cells and the toxin engulfing him and skyrocketing them.

chap 176 re:

Hide’s likelihood of surviving this mentally or physically?

Link source to sellable teruterubozou’s

A final note in regards to him, we saw his scarecrow outfit.

link to my gif post

The symbol of anonymity on the face (henohenomohenji) and the resemblance to teruterubouzu’s.

link to full art

Who:

“Traditionally, if the weather does turn out well, a libation of holy sake is poured over them, and they are washed away in the river”

According to a Japanese reading friend of mine, they might even get candy.

And what happens when the sun doesn’t come?

She said they cut the head off.

link

And well my research tells me she is right :

“Teru-teru-bozu, teru bozu/ Do make tomorrow a sunny day/ But if the clouds are crying/ Then I shall snip your head off”

There is also one origin theory that is quite harrowing :

“However, after promising good weather to a feudal lord, the sunshine did not appear as promised and the monk’s head was chopped off as punishment. It’s said the monk’s head was then wrapped in cloth and hung outside to stop the rain and bring out the sun.” (From the same link source I added above)

So what does this mean for Hide? He fixed so much in Kaneki’s absence.

In a way he brought the sunshine, but Hide’s purpose is not world peace, everything he does, he does for him.

So what is his payoff? Letting him be swept by a stream of water?

or maybe he will be decapitated somehow trying to help Kaneki one last time?

I say if you kill one off, have them be together in the end.Living without Kaneki would be terrible considering how emotionally invested Hide is.

#hideyoshi nagachika #hidekane #tokyo ghoul re manga #tokyo ghoul re #tokyo ghoul re analysis #tgre analysis #tg re theory #Anonymous

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ourwickedworld · 5 years

Text

The Rambling Man Travel Review: Reno, Nevada

Reno, Nevada… The Biggest Little City in the world, located mere miles from scenic Lake Tahoe. Reno, known for so many things. Yes, gambling is probably the first thing that creeps into your head as you begin the initial descent into Reno / Tahoe International Airport on the East end of Reno. But, Reno is so much more!! And, to be clear, because in an odd way I get this question more often than not. “No, Reno is not any where near Las Vegas!” Frankly, Sin City is a 6 plus hour car trip away. And, yes, the two Old West towns have some things in common, but the truth is they have more uncommon than you would expect. This is the Silver State, Ramblin with the Rambling Man, checking out the dudeability, the hang outs, the good time, hidden gems…. Rambling, walking, eating, drinking, fishing, hunting, sporting… Rambling into town, and taking in the town for all its worth. From local sporting events, to grabbing a cold beer, or strolling a midnight street in search of every dream inside my soul.

If you want to double down on 11 in a game of black jack, sure… You can take lady luck for a twirl at most locations in Nevada. Heck, you can gamble in the grocery store! Gambling, of course, does not hold a stick to legalized prostitution in the Silver State. A must see “dude event,” a most unique experience while in Nevada. One must visit a brothel. The experience of Ringing the bell, having the ladies line up, and the entire pomp and circumstance of legalized prostitution… This is Nevada!! Embrace it Bro.. And, hey, I am not singing a sad cowboy tune, but one does not have to sleep with a hooker to visit a Brothel. Gentleman, the experience of visiting the Whore House is truly West Coast Cowboy Country Cool. The experience of visiting the relic of the old west sorta makes actually having to bang a hooker totally unnecessary. But, if you do decide to go to Tuna Town in the desert. The house madam at the Brothel, and Brothel ownership, usually have high standards of safety and satisfaction. Plus, the State of Nevada ensures STD safe sex. What a Country! More like what a State. Yes, the only state with Legalized Prostitution, but not the only state with prostitution. As the oldest profession continues its strong industry and economic success globally.

Some suggestions: Mustang Ranch on the outskirts of Reno defines old west prostitution, and if you can avoid the rush of tires truck drivers who frequent the place, the experience is sure to remind you that being a dude is still groovy. The experience is sure to make you proud once again to be the sole proprietor of your personal penis, regardless of size. Mustang offers drinks and libations with the most perfect bar to take in a conversation with one of the many girls patrolling the room. The many patrons, of course, have their own unique stories as well sitting near if you so desire to engage. But, dang it bro, you are on vacation, strike up a conversation. Most Renoites will be more than happy to share a story or two, especially if you are talking golf, hookers, skiing, cold beer, or cards.

I woke up a bit foggy… I think I got home around 3:30 AM, an UBER brought me from Mustang back to my downtown Reno hotel room at the Eldorado Hotel and Casino. I was nude, my clothes from last night thrown over the chair adjacent to my bed, I could still smell the stench of Mustang and Crown Royal bellowing from my garments. What a night… I need some coffee and to walk some of the haze from behind my eyes. I take a quick walk upon exiting the casino doors at the Eldorado, moving South down Virginia St. I then take a right turn on First St.

I arrive at Hub Coffee Roasters on Riverside Dr in Reno. I sit outside, a round table with an extra chair my only company. I sip a tall black coffee and pick at my cheese Danish. My view is of the Truckee River and the adjacent walking trail and park. The trees scream early fall as I sit still listening to the peace of the morning.

On foot one can embrace a new city on a much more intimate level. You can walk almost in slow motion as you take in the new sights, smells, and people. My walk today has a walking path that winds around the Truckee River directly West towards the Keystone Ave Bridge, the Booth St. Bridge, and Idlewild Park. The orange, yellow leaves under my feet, as cool mountain air surrounds me. I hear chirps from a few birds, and the 10:00 AM train and its screech and horn. The water from the river heads East, against my walk. It is a most perfect morning, and I am stoned immaculate in my city by the big lake in the Sierras. You can almost smell that the snow of Winter is near, I walk. My head phones in both ears, music plays, song after song. I hear my playlist, my shuffle playlist. The many songs from Apple I-Tunes subscription.

Three miles is a decent introduction walk to Reno, as I start my daily stroll from Hub Coffee Roasters by directly heading west on the adjacent walking trail… I walk with the morning sun on my back, music keeping me company. Beck, REM, Pearl Jam, Band of Horses, Elliot Smith, Mount Eerie, Bob Dylan…. The Truckee River from the nearby Sierra Nevada Mountain range brings fresh and clear water from the tops of elevated peaks seen in the distance, the river keeps me company as I ramble on. It is a most perfect walk, a mix of solitude, water, fall, and some strange faces. My own music allows me to not skip a beat.

I have a personal tour of a local Cannabis Dispensary at 4 PM. And dinner with an old friend, Clint Cates. Yes, above and beyond gambling and prostitution, Nevada has recently legalized cannabis. Yep, you can literally go pick up a sack at a local retail weed dealer. What a country? And they deliver…

The inner workings of a cannabis dispensary, a bit underwhelming. It is all about security in a cash only business… And, the chronic has some street value, no doubt. So, bullet proof sheet rock, big safes with secret codes and levels of management. Not to mention, a big wall of people. I thought “Starbucks but weed” after 15 minutes into my tour because the Mynt Dispensary in Downtown Reno. The place was packed, all sorts of sour faces and young people alike looking at such a variety of products. Heck, when I was a kid, getting a sack of weed was a crap shoot. You would get a plastic sandwich bag with something green inside, and you would pay the man the cash. Today, its sativa or Indica. It’s oils, wax, vape pens, and don’t get me started on the names. Pot can’t just be pot anymore. Marketing has invaded the space, so pot now is Orange Krusk Kush, or Spiral to Insanity. Regardless, Reno has it all, and the Mynt Dispensary is close and will satisfy one’s curiosity on what is recreational legalization. Check it out….

Mr. Cates urged me to see the Grow Facility, the actual place the pot is grown. And, talk about impressive… To see such a green forest of pot inside the facility was one most unique experience. What a country? And, Nevada, Northern Nevada. This place is lit, no pun intended.

And, when you are stoned? Besides taking a walk and being outdoors, I enjoy food, duh… I think that is the pothead mantra, let’s get high and eat are faces off. For Clint’s chronic hospitality, and world class tour of the Mynt Dispensary facilities, I offered to buy the pot entrepreneur dinner.

Clint, he suggests a local staple, but a Cougar Stop first.

We walk into The Polo Lounge with glazed eyes and an unquenchable thirst. We pull up to seats at the bar, we were Wyatt Earp and Doc Holliday in a pair of cowboy boots galloping into this local dive bar. And, we were looking for a cold drink.

The Polo Lounge located in Midtown Reno is a retro and freaky dive bar with strange faces everywhere. The bar, however, is first and foremost a place to drink in a town of drinkers. Did I mention? Reno can drink. I am feeling a Vodka and Tonic with a lemon night is on the horizon. I am in the land of milk and honey, as this dive bar is also a Cougar den. Hot, horny, older women. And like fine wine, and vodka to my tongue, an older woman is truly as sexy as a woman can possible be. Especially, if the music is loud, the drinks are cheap, and last call is just a rumor. That’s right, you can drink all day and all night in the Biggest Little City. No last call!! What a country bro!!!

Clint stumbles back from a food run, we lost most of the night in a haze of laughter, pick up lines, and bar games. We even missed the food reservation. Clint finds a solution! He brings back some food from Miguel’s Mexican Cantina, a short walk away from The Polo Lounge. I am mouth first into an onion and cheese enchilada and a chili relleno in the most elegant egg crepe as 2 AM reared its ugly head. I order a cold beer to wash it down, The Polo Lounge happily accommodates our request to bring in outside food. Dive bar, check. Great company and laughter, check. Great Mexican food, check!! The Rambling Man thinks highly in regards to the drinkability and Eatability in the Biggest little City…

I sleep until high noon. The partly cloudy fall day brings a day to catch up. I have one more night in Reno, what will the last day of my weekend getaway bring. I hope more laughter, and more food.

What will today bring, a Sunday afternoon and night in Reno. I stick to my vacation theme, let’s walk, drink, eat, and find some laughter.

I start my last night with a Sunset Walk at nearby Virginia Lake. The manmade lake is exactly one mile around, it is a big oval walking / running path near the intersection of Virginia St. and Plumb Lane in Reno. It is a most beautiful walk and sunset. I start my walk, set for 3 laps, at approximately 5:45 PM, sunset set for 6:20 PM, and the sky was set ablaze with all of autumn’s glory. The lake is full of aquatic life, ducks, geese, turtles, fish. With the best feature of Virginia Lake, a forest of sage brush. As dusk approaches, the smell from the sage brush is worth a billion silver dollars. The smell of sun fading from summer, the old west meeting the fresh air of ancient mountain shadow. Air so still, my heart beats in rhythm with the season.

After the walk, I go to the nearby Atlantis Casino…. The Atlantis, less than a quarter mile from Virginia Lake, is where I will partake in the Steam Room with Eucalyptus spray and a world class massage. I feel like I am made of rubber, I feel happy. So, I make my way down to the sportsbook within the bowels of the Atlantis casino. I grab a beer and a nearby handicapping sheet, I am going to bet on the NFL Sunday night game of the Week, it’s the Patriots vs the Chiefs. What a game!! I put $500 on Tom Brady, the old man from Nor Cal, to win the game by more than two points.

At halftime, I stagger over to the Purple Parrot restaurant within the Atlantis to get my all time favorite sandwich, The Monty Cristo. This fried sandwich with a side of strawberry preserves is not something I eat, nor even have the option of ordering. The Monty Cristo with a side of fries, I sit at my table, lost in the casino carpet, and flashy neon lights, my eyes fixed upon the next numbers in the never ending run of Keno games on the overhead TV. In my head, I keep wishing for eight numbers to match, a dream of wealth and fame surely awaits if I can only just get 8 numbers correct.

The night fades into the swallows of tomorrow, I make my way back to downtown and the Eldorado. My flight leaves tomorrow at 10:15 AM….

Hue of the TV radiates upon my tired and sleepy head, a weekend in Reno. I spark my lighter, weed set aglow, I inhale. Stoned immaculate, I am the Rambling Man. Reno ENVY… Reno, Nevada… Walkability Score: 9 out of 10, Drinkability Score: 7 out of 10, Eatability Score: 7 out of 10, Overall Value: 8 of 10, The Ability of the City to Provide a Unique Experience: 10 of 10.

Or course, my weekend getaway is meant to start a conversation regarding travel. Reno has so much more to offer, like most cities, it would take multiple trips to take it all in. I, do however, list below some activities or events to consider when traveling to Reno.

1. Fish for Brown or Rainbow Trout in the Truckee River. Entrance Point at Mayberry Park west of town make this easy to access. Artificial flies, a Salmon Egg, or even a piece of Bacon on the end of the stick will find success at dawn or twilight.

2. Check out a University of Nevada Football game at nearby Mackey Stadium in the Fall, a Nevada Basketball game in the Winter, or a Reno Aces Minor League Baseball game in the Spring or Summer. Hey, we love our sports, and checking out a new venue is always cool.

3. Walking Options: Mayberry Park, Downtown Reno, Virginia Lake, Rancho San Rafael

4. Harrah’s Auto Museum – This is a legit place, full of classic cars that will blow your mind.

5. Rib Cookoff, Balloon Races, Hot August Nights, all tourists traps but a place to start a weekend to Ramble On…..

Finally, and in closing, what is the soul of the city, what is the Soul of Reno? Reno has two faces, and contradiction surrounds. The beauty of Lake Tahoe, the Truckee River, the Sierra Nevada Mountains, alongside the despair of prostitution and gaming. The city is the chain of vice, and the elegance of a perfect small town. It is the old west, yet modern day growth and opportunity abounds. It’s the Wild, Wild West, it’s the Biggest Little City in the World. Regardless, Reno is a fantastic place to Ramble On.

The Rambling Man continues next week, we explore Athens, Georgia. Please follow us on Twitter, @BarkmanPete. We are no longer on Facebook. Why? Because Facebook sucks.

Please consider checking out other Podcast segments available on The Pete Barkman Show. Segments include the following: The Rambling Man, Las Vegas Larry’s Losers ( sports picks, predictions, and handicapping). And, our How To Live a Happy and Healthy Life Series. Plus, much more. The Pete Barkman Show, available on most Podcast Platforms.

#travel #reno #Nevada #pot #gambling #travelreview #Food #Drink #walkability #drinkability #eatability #fish #menshealth #man #men

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