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edupunkn00b · 20 days

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Progression, Ch. 3: Come Out and Play

Photo by edupunkn00b

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Remus uses his powers to convince Patton the rats he found in the garden are cats. Written for @imnotgrimimjustagrumpyreaper's @dukeceit-week-2024, Day 3: Cats/Rats

“Well aren’t you just a little cutie patootie?” Patton’s coo carried up to Janus on the roof and he tilted his head, listening. Virge was out on a run with Luc, and Ro held the other end of the new solar panel they were installing. Had Muse—

He closed his eyes and pushed past the electromagnetic field guarding the Muse's room from most of the chaos of the rest of the world's thoughts. No, he was there, in his room. He was listening to music. Likely sharing the melody with his brother, the source of Ro’s rhythmic head bop and faraway eyes.

So who was Patton talking to?

“Yes, come to Papa, little kitties,” Patton called in a song-song. “There you go,” he said, the next words too quiet to make out from the roof.

Ro finally noticed Janus’ distraction and he hurried to latch his end of the panel into place. Nodding to Ro, they moved together to the roof’s edge and looked out to the garden below.

Patton sat cross-legged under the large peach tree he and Virge salvaged from one of their first scavenge runs. Whether through special powers or pure stubbornness, Patton had nursed it to health and this summer promised a bumper crop of warm, heavy peaches.

In his lap was a small furry creature, head dwarfed and obscured by his massive palm. “Yes, you just needed a gentle touch, didn’t you?” he said, laughing. “Oh, are you hungry?” he asked. The creature nipped at his finger and Patton flinched, revealing the long, pointed nose of a rat.

“Padre!” Ro called and leapt from the roof, float-flying down to the ground. “Padre, put the rat down!”

“Oh, no, Kiddo,” he smiled and held up the squirming rodent. “Look, it’s a little kitty! Can you believe it? I thought they’d gone extinct when…”

-“ Muse !”- Janus reached for to The Muse with the image of Patton holding what was likely a rabies and corona-infected rat. -“It’s biting him, Muse. Drop the Illusion!”-

The Muse grumbled back at him but didn’t really argue. After throwing a hydrophobic tarp over the incomplete panels, Janus rushed downstairs.

Patton’s startled scream was cut off by the slam of the roof’s exit door.

“I’m sorry, Jannie.”

Jannie didn’t respond, a thick haze of static around his thoughts. Silent, wordless, shielded, he only frowned at him and latched the door. Jannie sighed, still facing the door, then turned, arms crossed over his chest. His hands were tucked against his ribs, hidden from view. The Muse caught the flash of yellow at his wrists, though, and hung his head.

This was gonna be bad.

“I’m really, really sorry,” he repeated when Jannie still didn’t speak. Still didn’t touch him. Still wouldn’t reach for him. “Is Papa Bear okay? He's never a real cat and he likes them so much from the stories and he was getting bored and lonely down in the garden and… Jannie? Is he okay?”

Jannie’s expression was sharp and he kept his mind shrouded in that damned static. The Muse could probably push through it, but the last time he’d tried, Jannie had noticed. And had not been happy about it. “Please, Jannie?” He stretched and listened to the rest of the house. He caught the shape of Ro’s thoughts, the image of Papa Bear in the infirmary with bloody puncture marks on the side of his hand.

Then Jannie’s static fell over even that.

“Hey!” He recoiled, stepping back from Jannie and stomping his foot. “Don’t do that!” Without conscious control, The Muse pushed back, hard . The static shattered under the pressure, cutting into his flesh, his heart, his head. Jannie shuddered, scars bright and dark against his paled skin. His eyes rolled back, for just a breath, but the door kept him upright and on his feet.

The Muse didn’t wait for him to recover. He followed the cracks in Jannie’s shield, seeping through until he once again felt the familiar fiery warmth of their connection, searching for what Jannie had seen. The static returned and the air around them exploded in light.

Voice and thought bled together and he grabbed Jannie’s shirt, pulling him close. -“That’s not fair! I just wanted to—“

-“ Muse, stop !”- Jannie’s shout filled his mind and drowned the rest of his words, a hand slapped over his mouth and over his mind. He froze, unable to see, unable to hear, unable to breathe. He dropped to his knees, teeth jolting. Wet copper, the tang of that tarnished coin he and Ro had found outside, filled his mouth.

Slowly, Jannie loosened his hold and a trickle of cold air filled his throat, his lungs.

He opened his eyes.

The room was dark, full black. He knelt, curled over himself until his forehead touched the floor, but he couldn’t feel it. He couldn’t see it. Couldn’t even hear it. Jannie stood before him, hands hanging loose at his sides. He closed his eyes and all he could see was Jannie.

-”Muse, no.”- Was that pain in his voice? With everything, with everyone blocked out, The Muse caught every blip and crack in Jannie’s words. He was hurting, a hot, sharp ache shooting through his brain, his veins, pumping molten lead through his limbs and his fingers and down to the ground. It spilled out, sticky, burning tar sizzling as it crawled up The Muse's feet and legs.

It hurt to do this. It hurt to block him from the others like this. To save them from him. It hurt him but it hurt Jannie worse.

It hurt so bad.

-”I’m sorry,”- he sent as gently as he could. Jannie staggered against his whispered thought. -”I’m sorry.”-

#Progression #ts remus #ts janus #The Muse #Silvertongue #Janus Gates #special appearances by the rest of the Mad Lads: Roman Emir‚ Virgil Morado‚ Patton Hart‚ and Lucas Hart #companion story #Meus ex Machina #Out of the Machine #can be read separately #y'all know that angst you knew was coming because you _are_ reading Out of the Machine or Meus ex Machina #yeaaaahhh…#dukeceit #dukeceitweek2024

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aredlemon · 6 months

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Heartbreak. Ao3

Summary:

To feel heartbroken may just be the worst fate of them all.

Just some sad boi Ro hours, look I wrote it at 12 am

Notes:

Cw: unrequited love, implied character death, bad letter writing

Pairings: unrequited roceit, dukeceit

~~~

Oh to be loved by you…

To be held and cherished. To feel your flesh burn hot against mine. Your breath warm against my bare neck.

How I wish to see you. Your presence oh ever so holy. My eyes locked on you, unable to flutter from fear of losing sight of you.

Being able to hear your voice, dripping with honey as you whisper sweet nothings in my ear. Listening you talk till I go deaf. Revelling in promises of an eternity with you…

But I’d be a fool, for you have chosen him.

———

Roman stared down at the piece of paper. Why? Why did he choose *him*?

Why wasn’t he the object of the snake’s affection?

What did Remus have that he didn’t?

———

His smile lighting up a whole room. Shining brighter than any star could. Perfectly crooked teeth showing through.

Piercing green eyes akin to absinthe. Greener than any grass one would see, a gaze so captivating it’ll put anyone under a spell. Framed by ever so slightly purplish skin.

A pale body contrasted by dark hair. Short messy locks, swaying softly at the lightest of winds. Fusing together to create, what one would truly describe as, a sight for sore eyes.

Of course you’d choose him.

———

The now tear stained page was laying idly on the desk. Taunting Roman.

Why would you even choose me?

———

Whilst I am anything but enchanting. Simple tan skin blending in with chestnut hair. Eyes the colour of dirt, the most common of them all.

Nothing special.

———

Roman took in a breath. His chest ached as he dipped the pen in the ink.

Oh what a fool he was.

———

I shall wish you the best, for jealousy is not going to change anything.

Now that you know of my true feelings for you, ones that have been suppressed to the deepest depths of my soul, I may move on.

But please do fulfil one request of mine, for I will not be there to do so my self.

Forgive yourself and him of any pain or guilt this letter may bring upon you. I hope the happiest of day are yet to come for you, and that you may live a life by each others side.

-The one who hurt you both.

———

Upon closing the letter Roman sat at his desk for a little while longer. Slowly sitting up from his chair he walked towards the neatly made bed. Each movement deliberate, slow, and elegant.

As he lay on his back, staring upwards, he thought.

What if, even if for a second, there was the slimmest chance of a different outcome. One that would keep his heart intact. One so desirable he would risk anything to achieve it.

But it was too late, for the letter had been written, and his eyes were growing heavy.

So that was it.

The room grew dark as everything became a blur. The pain in his chest expanded, spreading to the tips of his fingers. Gravity felt ten times stronger, Roman unable to even cover his mouth. As he coughed, red stained his pretty white dress shirt, his chin, his lips.

Oh to truly feel heartbreak is horrendous, yet to live with it is a fate worse than death.

Notes:

Holy moly! Thank you so much for the recognition in my last one! I wanted to get something out as a thank you :)

I’ll probably stick to writing short and “sweet” (if you can call them that) works. Also reference to my ‘Sweet nothings’ drawing lol

(Also I was looking at johnlock posts of the wedding before this so- you can see the inspo)

#ao3 #fanfic #roman sanders #my writing #sanders sides #unrequited love #unrequited roceit #roceit #dukeceit #tw implied death #roman angst

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fangirlwriting-stories · 2 years

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One Chance To Make A First Impression

Summary: Roman and Janus have an unusual soulmate situation, in that they are soulmates with each other, and another person besides themselves. Having multiple soulmates isn’t looked on too highly, but that doesn’t stop them from being excited to meet their third soulmate.

Unfortunately, the day they end up doing that, Roman had been having a terrible time, and, well. You know what they say about first impressions.

Chapter 1/6:

...

Having two soulmates was not generally approved of, as Roman had learned young. Many people had given him disgusted looks based on the two sentences on his wrist. And they were two sentences. They weren’t different enough that there was any doubt about that, no matter what his mother wanted to say about it.

One of the sentences he now knew belonged to Janus, and Roman still laughed at how perfectly it fit him. Roman had stumbled into him in the hallway in ninth grade, they had nearly tripped over each other, and then Janus had caught him, before saying smoothly “Well, don’t fall for me all at once.”

Roman was still rather impressed with his own response, given the fact that he was suddenly processing meeting his soulmate: “Why complain, when you catch me so easily?”

The two sentences made a lovely pair, and they often enjoyed showing them off to people they felt safe with.

Unfortunately, it tended to stop with people they felt safe with, because not many people approved of the other sentence on their wrists. Janus’ said “Whoops, didn’t see you there, I’m running late,” which, while not promising for the amount of time they’d have when meeting their next soulmate, wasn’t anything like Roman’s. Roman’s concerned both of them.

“I’m sorry.”

“Maybe they just bump into you,” Remus, Roman’s twin brother, suggested. “Like, bump, ‘whoops, didn’t see you there, I’m running late, I’m sorry,’ and then rushes by both of you and you have to grab them and figure out where to meet up after whatever they’re doing.”

“Maybe,” Roman said, looking worriedly down at his wrist. “I just… there’s a billion other possibilities.”

“That’s the point,” Remus said. “There’s too many possibilities for you to know why they’re saying that. You shouldn’t stress over it. People say I’m sorry all the time, about totally stupid stuff. I said sorry to a chair when I knocked it over yesterday before I realized it wasn’t alive. This is probably just totally casual, automatic pleasantry shit that comes when you annoy a stranger. Stop stressing about it.”

Roman sighed. “Yeah, you’re right. Besides, I can’t spend my entire life worried about what’s going to happen when I meet my other soulmate. For one thing, it’d probably really piss this one off,” Roman said, leaning back against Janus’ chest, who was sitting behind him on the bed.

“Yes, I’m just furious,” Janus said, resting his head on top of Roman’s. “How dare you imply that I’m not enough for you by constantly worrying about someone you haven’t met yet. In fact, I’ve decided that we’re breaking up, you’re clearly not committed enough to this relationship.”

“No, don’t leave me, you still have all of my sweatshirts,” Roman deadpanned.

“Naturally, they’re big on me and I look adorable in them.”

“You do,” Roman cooed, turning over and kissing Janus on his nose, then his cheeks, then his forehead.

“Hey, I’m right here,” Remus said, glaring at both of them.

Roman tried to ignore the slight something else under his gaze by sticking his tongue out and snuggling into Janus’ arms again.

Janus worried about their soulmate’s first words to Roman too, though he didn’t admit it to Remus. The two of them had a chaos element going, and according to Janus, he wasn’t going to risk that by being emotionally vulnerable.

But when they were alone, and especially when one of them was staying over and they ended up snuggling under covers together, Janus would whisper quietly to Roman, “They’re okay, right?”

“I’m sure they’re fine,” Roman said, because when Janus got like this, what he really wanted was for Roman to comfort him while neither of them acknowledged that their worst fears might be true. Sometimes Roman would add on further, “And if they’re not, we’ll be there for them.”

Janus would agree, and then they’d both snuggle closer to hold each other. It would always make them feel better in the moment, but they both knew that it would never get rid of the worries there completely. Nothing would, until they met the third of their soulmate group and finally got to be happy together.

They went through the rest of high school without any meetings, though, and eventually they started looking at colleges together. Remus was a part of that, because though he may not be either of their soulmates in any way, he was still a part of their group, and a large part of Roman thought that college without his twin would be just awful. He also hadn’t met his soulmate Thomas yet, so he had nothing tying him to anything else.

And thankfully, they all found a place to go together, and Roman could rest easy on that particular point.

College was… interesting. It was full of much more open minded people than anyone in the small town Roman and Remus, and later Janus, had grown up in. But there were still a fair share of people who gave them looks once they learned that Roman and Janus had another soulmate. The people here didn’t say anything directly to them, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t tell.

As a result, the three of them ended up keeping more to themselves than Roman would have expected when they first got there. They had gotten closer to someone named Remy, who Remus had met and clicked with to the despair of both Janus and Roman. But other than him, they mostly tried to keep to themselves, which meant that when Roman did end up talking to people, it usually didn’t go well.

On this day in particular it had been going worse than usual. He began the day with a lovely text from his mother about tattoo parlors that could cover unwanted soulmarks, because no matter how many times Roman explained to her that he wanted both of his soulmates, she didn’t seem to get the picture.

He would have loved to curl up back in bed after that, but he had an early class, so he had to get up at that point and leave Janus curled up under the covers to sleep for another two hours like the lucky asshole he was.

When he eventually made it to the lecture hall, there were people from the church nearby standing outside and holding signs about staying with your soulmate being what was best for you; as well as listing people who dated other people, people who dated no one, and people with multiple soulmates all as examples of who was going to hell. Roman ducked his head and went into the building as quickly as possible, though thankfully none of them were directing any shouting at him specifically.

The day still didn’t improve from there, though. The story they’d read in preparation for that class had been about soulmates, meaning throughout the class the person they were going to end up with was mentioned several times, which wouldn’t normally have bothered Roman as much as it did, but he was already on edge from the text from his mother and the people outside, so he spent most of the class with his head propped up on his fist while glaring at the wall.

At least after class he could meet up with Janus and get coffee. Janus often waited outside the classroom with it on days that it wasn’t Roman’s turn to pay, meaning he was there today, which was good because Roman desperately needed him to be.

He pulled them both towards the back way out of the building, but before they got there, as soon as they were alone in a hallway, he turned and buried his chest in Janus’ shirt.

“Bad day?” Janus said, running his hands through Roman’s hair.

Roman mumbled something that was incomprehensible even to him.

“I have coffee,” Janus said, slipping a cup into Roman’s hand.

“You’re an angel,” Roman said, standing up in order to be able to take a sip of it. “Have I ever told you that you’re an angel?”

“Only every time you get sappy,” Janus said, taking Roman’s hand as they both started towards the exit again. “Which for you is a near constant.”

“Mm, well it’s true,” Roman said, pushing the door open.

Unfortunately, that was when he realized that the people from earlier must have followed a crowd and moved around to the other side of the building.

Roman groaned and buried his head in his hands.

“Oh, is this what we were trying to avoid?” Janus said, giving Roman a sympathetic pat on the back. “Alright, come on then.” He led them both around the group as quickly as they could manage, and they started towards Roman’s favorite haunt, over by a small pond with a gazebo that they liked to eat lunch in.

Roman still felt pretty tense as the voices behind them started to slowly fade, but Janus was helping, and he couldn’t help but wonder for a second how much easier things would be if it was just the two of them. He loved Janus, and the two of them were perfectly happy just like this. Would they have been happier if their third soulmate had never been theirs at all?

Roman sighed and took Janus’ hand again as they kept moving forward. Janus turned to look at him in concern when he sighed, but Roman kept looking ahead of them both just in time to see someone ram into Janus while carrying an armful of books.

Both Janus and the other person cried out in surprise, and Janus dropped his coffee, which splattered all over the ground below them.

“Whoops, didn’t see you there, I’m running late,” the person said, dropping to grab the books that had fallen before they got covered with coffee.

Roman realized that those were the other set of words on Janus’ wrist just as the person stood back up, and without thinking, he snapped, “We would have been fine without you.”

The person blinked.

“Roman!” Janus exclaimed, turning to glare at him. “What in the world is wrong with you? Please don’t mind him, he—” Janus stopped when he turned back to the other person.

Roman turned back to look at them, and a pit dropped into his stomach.

The person’s eyes had welled up with tears, and he’d started shaking all over. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, and Roman’s eyes widened as he realized that for this person, what he’d just said wouldn’t have only been a thoughtless comment that he didn’t really mean.

“Wait,” Roman said. “Wait, please I didn’t—”

Before he could say anything else, though, the other person turned and brushed past them both, starting to walk, then run in the other direction.

“No, wait, please!” Roman cried, turning desperately towards them. But they were already much too far away to hear them.

Roman was pretty sure he’d started shaking too at this point, and he pressed his hand over his mouth. “I— I didn’t—”

“Roman,” Janus said, turning and taking Roman by the shoulders. “Hey, Roman, look at me.”

“I didn’t mean that,” Roman whispered, tears starting to well in his own eyes. “Janus, I didn’t mean that.”

“I know you didn’t. I know that. Roman, look at me, you need to breathe.”

“But I didn’t— and he—and I—”

“I know, Roman,” Janus said, pulling Roman towards him and wrapping him in a hug. “I know.”

Roman’s own coffee slipped from his hand to join Janus’ on the ground, and he wrapped his arms around Janus and buried his head in his shoulder.

“It’s okay,” Janus murmured. “It’s going to be okay. We’ll find him again, we’ll explain, it’ll be okay.”

“That’s not— it’s not that easy,” Roman said, because those were the first words he’d said to that person, which meant that— that for his whole life he’d—

“It’s going to be okay,” Janus said again, and Roman realized what he was doing. This was their moment to lie to themselves, before they had to acknowledge to what colossal degree Roman had just fucked everything up. So Roman buried his head in Janus’ shoulder and cried as Janus murmured over and over again that it would be okay.

…

They found the person in the dining hall at lunchtime, which was probably why they were just meeting him now, since they almost never ate lunch here. The second the person looked up, and as soon as he saw them he started to push his chair back, probably to run again.

“No, please,” Roman said, holding out his hand, and the person stopped, still looking terrified. “Please, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean what I said.”

The person leaned back, still looking scared, but at least he wasn’t sprinting from the room, which was something.

“I—” Roman didn’t know what to say from there. It’s not like he could just introduce himself like this was a normal soulmate meeting.

Luckily for them, and thank heavens this was the case, Roman didn’t have to figure out this relationship all alone.

“Are you alright?” Janus said, sitting hesitantly down while pulling the chair back from the table so he wouldn’t be getting any closer to the other person.

“I— uh— I’m sorry, I didn’t—” the person said, looking between them both.

“You don’t need to apologize,” Roman said, holding up his hands when the person looked at him in fear. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

The person’s gaze turned a little confused. “But… you’re… you’re them. Aren’t you?”

Roman nodded. “I didn’t… I didn’t mean what I said,” he said. “I’m so sorry. I was having a really awful day, and I snapped and said something I didn’t mean.”

The person blinked. “Something you didn’t…” he blinked again, looking like Roman had just tilted his entire world off axis with two sentences. He didn’t say anything else for a very long moment.

“I’m… Roman,” Roman said hesitantly. He gestured to his left. “This is Janus.”

The person shook his head. “You… but you said… I thought…”

“I can imagine,” Janus said gently. “I’m so sorry things ended up this way. But neither of us hate you. We’ve been looking forward to meeting you.”

The person shook his head again, tears welling in his eyes. “No,” he said. “No, you haven’t. You said— you—” He took a shaky breath and pressed his hands over his eyes.

Roman looked over at Janus, lost as to what to do here.

“Okay,” Janus said, and the person looked up again. “I imagine this is overwhelming. So how about…” He grabbed one of Roman’s notebooks that he still had from class, and Roman handed him a pencil too once he realized what he was doing. Janus scribbled both of their phone numbers down, tore out the paper, and passed them back to the person.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Janus said, as the person hesitantly accepted it. “It doesn’t… it doesn’t have to be anytime soon,” he gave a shaky smile. “But please know we really are looking forward to hearing from you.”

With that, he took Roman’s hand, and they both headed out of the cafe, leaving the person alone.

As soon as they made it outside the building, Roman moved to the side and collapsed against the wall.

“Roman,” Janus said instantly. “Hey.”

“We don’t even know his name,” Roman murmured.

“It’s okay,” Janus said. “It’ll be okay. We did everything we could right now.”

Roman buried his head in his hands.

“Stop it,” Janus said, pulling his hands down. “Stop blaming yourself.”

Roman stared up at him. “It’s my fault.”

“It’s not— okay, yes, but not to the extent you’re thinking,” Janus said. “If this was any other situation, you’d have to apologize for saying a shitty thing after a bad day and then move on.”

“But it’s not any other situation,” Roman said. “It’s this one.”

“Roman, it’s not your fault those words are on his wrist.”

“Yes it is!”

“No, it’s not. Again, you’re at fault for saying a shitty thing after a bad day, which you apologized for as soon as you possibly could. You cannot be held responsible for a person’s entire life. It is not your fault those words are on his wrist.”

Roman shook his head, tears welling in his eyes again. “We don’t know how he was affected by that. Janus, it looks like I really hurt him.”

“So we’ll help him,” Janus said, leaning their foreheads together. “Remember? What we were totally prepared to do anyway? It’ll be okay, Roman. Maybe not immediately, but eventually we’ll be okay.”

“You don’t know that,” Roman whispered.

Janus sighed. “You’re right, I don’t,” he admitted. “But you’re not alone in this. None of us are. We’re all going to work through it together.”

“If he even wants that,” Roman said. “If I didn’t ruin our entire chance with him before we even met.”

“You didn’t,” Janus said firmly. “That’s not possible, Roman.”

“Really, because it looks like that’s what just happened,” Roman said, gesturing behind them.

“You don’t know that, Roman. You’re jumping to conclusions. It’s perfectly understandable if he needs some time to process after everything that just happened. As a matter of fact, I suggest we do the same.”

Roman blinked. “What?”

“Let’s go home, Roman. It’s been a very difficult day, and we should go home and rest.”

“Oh,” Roman said weakly. “Yeah, that… let’s do that.” He rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands and looked up at Janus again when he lowered them. “I’m sorry. Are you okay?”

“Worry about you right now, darling,” Janus said, leaning over and giving Roman a light kiss on the forehead. “I’ll be okay.”

Roman pulled Janus into his arms for a second anyway, squeezing him tightly. “Thank you,” he mumbled. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Janus said, squeezing Roman back just as tightly. “We’re gonna make it through this, alright?”

Roman made a muffled noise of affirmation, and then they both started home.

…

Remus, who didn’t have any classes that day like the lucky fucker he was, was understandably surprised when both of them came back looking like a wreck. He wasn’t less concerned when he heard what happened, but he did take one more look at them both and announce that they were ordering pizza that night for dinner and eating it and ice cream in front of all the best movies Dreamworks had to offer.

Roman, naturally, immediately started arguing for Disney instead, but he suspected Remus’ real plan was to get them focused on something else, and he’d hand it to him, it worked.

They did end up getting pizza and ice cream and eating their feelings away in front of The Little Mermaid (and then Shrek, because Remus earned it by trying to cheer them up). Roman managed to mostly get his mind off of their soulmate throughout the course of the evening, at least until Janus suddenly reached for the remote in the middle of the movie, paused it, and passed his phone to Roman.

Roman blinked down at it for a couple seconds before he realized what was on the screen.

(919) 867-5309: My name’s Patton

(919) 867-5309: I think I might need a little time to process

(919) 867-5309: Saturday? Do-over?

Roman took a shaky breath and nodded. “Saturday,” he said weakly. “I can do Saturday.”

“Me too,” Janus said, as Remus peered over his shoulder to look at the phone. “You want to meet at the coffee shop by the library?”

“Yeah,” Roman said. “Let’s do that.”

Janus nodded and started responding to Patton.

“See, look at that,” Remus said, Roman glanced over at him. “You guys are fixing things already. You’re gonna be okay.”

“I don’t think it’s going to be that easy,” Roman said.

“It’s a start,” Remus said. “You’ve got this.”

“It’s definitely not all going to be easy,” Janus said with a nod. “But for now we just have to explain what’s happened, and get to know each other just like you and I did. It’s gonna be okay.”

“Exactly,” Remus said, smiling at Janus. “It’s all gonna work out.”

Roman snuggled closer to Janus’ side and rested his head on his shoulder. “I hope you’re right,” he said.

At that point none of them really wanted to think about it more for the rest of the night, so Janus turned the movie back on and all three of them ended up in a cuddle pile in the middle of the couch, doing their best to relax.

It worked alright for that night, but with their new plans to meet on Saturday, Roman found it difficult to focus on much else for the rest of the week. When Saturday finally approached, he and Janus were both equally a wreck. Roman spent most of the morning pacing around the house, and Janus spent it cooking an absurd amount of food in the kitchen.

“I’ll be here as soon as you get back,” Remus said, from his spot on the couch between them both. “We can celebrate, or have a pity party, or some weird hybrid of the two depending on how it goes.”

“Thank you, Remus,” Janus said, giving him a grateful smile that lingered just a second too long, which Roman wasn’t going to comment on.

“Thanks,” Roman agreed, because he didn’t think there was much Remus could do to calm them down completely, but he appreciated how hard he was trying.

They left after lunch, since they’d all planned to meet there at 1:00, and both of them agreed they did not want to make Patton wait.

They got there with plenty of time to spare, which wasn’t great for Roman’s nerves as their decided time approached.

“You don’t think he decided not to come, right?” Roman asked.

Janus shook his head. “No, I don’t. He’ll be here.”

“I mean if he did decide not to come that would be totally understandable considering—”

“Roman, I think he’ll be here,” Janus said gently.

Roman took a deep breath, and nodded. “Yeah,” he said, trying to convince himself more than agreeing. “I think you’re probably right.”

“Roman, it’s about time you learned that I’m always right,” Janus said, giving him a teasing smirk.

Roman laughed a little. “I love you,” he said, reaching out and grabbing Janus’ hand.

“I love you too,” Janus said, bringing it up to his mouth and kissing it.

Roman smiled at him, but before he could say anything else, the door finally opened, and the person he now knew as Patton walked in.

Janus picked up on Roman’s look and turned to look too, just in time for two other people that Roman did not recognize to follow Patton in.

They were clearly with Patton, though, because as soon as Patton saw the two of them, he said something quietly to the one in the purple hoodie, and all three of them started over.

“Um. Hi,” Patton said as he stopped in front of the table.

Roman nodded. “Hi,” he said quietly.

“I’m glad to see you again,” Janus said, giving Patton his most sincere smile.

The one in the purple hoodie scoffed, but Patton gave him a look before he could say anything.

“I… I am too,” he said, still sounding hesitant. He looked nervously at the other two people, and the one who had glasses like Patton nodded at him. Patton nodded again, more to himself, then turned back to face Roman and Janus.

“So, um, I’m Patton,” he said. He pointed to the person with the purple hoodie, and then the one with the glasses and dress shirt. “This is Virgil, and Logan. They’re, uh…”

“We’re his boyfriends,” Virgil snapped, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow. “You don’t have a problem with that, do you?”

…

Chapter Two

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lily-janus · 2 years

Text

The Awful Truth

Summary: Janus finds out Remus' true feelings about him

Pairing: platonic Dukeceit

Warnings: lots and lots of angst, some cursing, a lot of yelling and arguing. If there's anything else lemme know.

Word count: 1,090

Ahhh dukeceit week started I'm so excitedd!!! I chose to focus on the truth prompt for today, prepare yourself for angst and heartbreak... this doesn't have a happy ending... enjoy!😉

@dukeceitweek day 1: truth/dare

.........

Janus sighed in relief as he appeared back in his room, quickly putting the glove he took off back on, shivering as he remembered how he exposed himself in front of Thomas, Roman and Patton.

Strange, he didn't think of himself as someone who would take a leap of faith like that… he certainly didn't plan on doing it today… but he saw an opportunity and he took it. Janus did see himself as an opportunist, that was all it was, nothing more.

He didn't have much time to contemplate the matter further as someone burst into his room and flopped dramatically on his king-sized bed. Janus didn't even have to turn around to see who it was.

"Hello, Remus, glad you listened to my latest knocking lecture I gave you, truly appreciate it." Janus said as he turned around to face the creative side sprawled on his bed.

Remus huffed. "Knocking's boring, this place is boring, what the fuck took you so long?" He whined needily and Janus rolled his eyes.

"Some of us are actually getting things done you know, making progress and all that nonsense." Janus remarked.

"C'mon Janny, all you do these days is work! Let's have some fun like we used to. You know, before you became all serious and uptight." Remus provoked him, as usual knowing exactly how to get a rise out of the deceitful side.

Janus smirked. "Is that what you think? Well, will 'uptight and serious' do this?" He snapped his fingers, turning into Patton.

"No, Thomas! You can't say anything other than the truth! Otherwise you'll be…" he gasped exagertavley. "Like everyone else." With that he clutched his heart dramatically and fainted with mocked horror.

Remus grinned. "There's my snakey! Do me next! Do me next!" He sat up on Janus' bed and clapped his hands excitedly.

Janus smirked proudly as he got up, changing into Remus next, and then Roman, until he impersonated all of the sides in turn.

They were both giggling and snickering at the end of it and Janus finally changed back into his fabolous self.

"So, what happened with the dorks this time?" Remus asked blatantly as they both laid on the bed next to each other.

Janus huffed. "They were impossibly frustrating as usual, Patton even more so, had a total moral breakdown, his tiny brain unable to process that sometimes you need to prioritize yourself." He rolled his eyes.

"But luckly I was able to knock some sense into him, Roman didn't take it well but he'll get over himself. I get that Patton had made his world view so narrow and it's hard for him but that's no excuse to make fun of my name." Janus' heart clenched painfully as he remembered that moment.

Remus turned on his side to look at him. "Your name?"

Janus turned to meet his friend's eyes, then sighed. "Yeah I… I'm not sure what drove me to reveal it myself but… I did, big mistake but at least that seemed to make Patton and Thomas warm to the idea of listening to me from time to time." Janus said bitterly.

Remus huffed. "Well that's not what happened when I revealed my name." He said, sharp tone surprising Janus.

He almost sounded… jealous.

"Remus?" His forehead wrinkled in confusion, studying his old friend carefully.

"You know, I don't know why I'm even surprised, this is sooo typical. Of course, I'm always brutally honest and always tell the truth, but you're the one ending up getting listened to. Perfect sense right?!" Remus was getting frantic with every word, getting up off the bed and pacing around the room.

"Remus, can't you see? This can only be beneficial to both of us in the future-"

"Is it? Is that why you did it, Deceit?" Remus turned around to face him, jabbing an accusatory finger at him.

Janus swallowed at the title. "Of course, why else would I do it?"

"You tell me mister keeping-things-close-to-the-chest, the embodiment of Thomas' selfishness!" Remus was yelling now, voice even more high pitched than usual.

"I don't appreciate what you're implying, Remus." Janus hissed. "Besides, I told you I didn't even plan on doing it-"

"Exactly! Since when do you ever stray from your own brilliant plans hm? Something else pushed you to do it. Am I not enough? Is that it? You prefer them over me now?" Remus was clutching Janus' shoulders now, knuckles white from the tight hold.

"Are you… going to leave? Like him?" Remus suddenly whispered, a sob escaping his throat.

Janus swallowed the bile in his throat, his stomach flipping uncomfortably in his belly. He looked down. "Is that… really what you think of me? After all those years we spent together, just the two of us, cast out from the rest… you still think I'm just selfish and deceitful? That I'll leave you behind the first chance I get? Is that… is that all you see me as?" His voice was sad and defeated.

Remus staggered back, not expecting this reaction. "That's not what I… I'm just scared-"

"Well I was scared too! You think it was easy for me? Do you think I felt comfortable exposing myself in front of them, of all people? But I did it anyway! You know why? Because I finally saw a chance to show them a different side of me, of us. I did it for us, I put myself on the line for the slim chance of changing their goddamn mind about us!" Janus was the one yelling now, standing up and shooting daggers at Remus.

"But no, I only think of myself, right Remus? I'm just lying all the time! Playing endless games with everyone for my own amusement, I don't care about anyone else! Right, Remus?!"

Remus was wimpering in front of him, suddenly seeming small and fragile. Janus sighed.

"I really thought we had something special…" he said quietly, hugging himself. And then his expression darkened. "But truth is... you're just like the rest of them." He spat bitterly. "Get out of my room."

"Jan I-"

"I said, get out of my room!" He slammed his hand on the wall and heard the sound of broken glass. He turned to see it was the wine glass Remus made for him after Virgil left, the green and yellow shards now all over the floor. He turned back towards Remus but he was already gone.

"Good riddance." He snarled. Not like he needs him anyway, he doesn't need anyone… not anymore.

#sanders sides #janus sanders #remus sanders #platonic dukeceit #remus sanders angst #janus sanders angst #tw arguing #tw yelling #dukeceitweek2022 #dukeceitweek #Lily writes

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thatgenderlessentity · 1 year

Text

Janus- Oh, knock it off, Remus.

Remus- You knock it off, Remus!

Janus- What? That doesn’t even make any sense.

Source: She-ra

#sanders sides #sanders sides incorrect quotes #ts janus #janus sanders #ts remus #remus sanders #source: she ra #remus angst #platonic dukeceit #could be interpreted either way

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jackalopes-pen · 1 year

Text

The Real Monster

Based on: Tiktok by @king.kai.2

WARNING: Unsympathetic Patton | Remus being.. Remus | An inordinate amount of swearing | Hurt/Comfort

Summary: Patton is an asshole, then it's a dukeceit hurt/comfort

A/N: I’m back from the dead. Did you miss me?

—--------------------------------------------------------------------

“You’re a monster!” Janus exclaimed, his accusation ringing off the empty walls of canyon leading down to the subconscious

Patton returned it with a heartless, cold laugh. “Trying looking in a mirror.” The setting sun gave his sky blue eyes a wicked glow. With the flick of a wrist the chains binding the yellow side pulled him off the surface into the abyss below, letting go when it was too late to stop his descent.

He fell, the wind swirled around him like tentacles and though the fall was all too familiar it felt like a taunt when not by choice. The very darkness at the bottom seemed a mocking grin. Janus let his body fall until the ground approached, using the shadows around him to get away just before the ground and appear in their humble.. mess of living quarters.

Shadow walking was a rather valuable skill when it came to falls, when the light disappeared so could he. Janus was one of two sides able to do it, the other being Remus after begging to be taught. Now wasn't the time to dwell on that though.

What mattered was that the light[core] sides were ruled by a dictator and his name was Patton. Janus had attempted many a coup in the past to no avail. This time was a particularly bitter defeat, as not only did Thomas witness this, harming his chances of actual success, but he took a physical toll in the form of 3 sword wounds (courtesy of Roman), 16 scales stolen for 'research', and a choice dagger from Virgil to the ribs.

While ordinarily a core side could heal these in a matter of seconds, a non-core side/dark side, (thanks, Roman) had a bit more trouble. You see, by living and working in the subconscious they weren't given the attention, care, nor power to expend on instantaneous healing. Instead, they either had to ask a healer like Roman or Patton to help [which never happens] or deal with it until it goes away on it's own only mildly sped due to being imaginary. In total, the wounds would likely take around 7 months in total. The dagger would probably be the last to fade due it's depth and potence. Yet, it would take longer if he couldn't find the first-aid kit. WHERE THE FUCK DID IT GO?!

"Remus! Did you steal the first aid to drink the rubbing alcohol again?" Janus yelled out.

Remus emerged from the hallway leading down to their rooms. "What if I did- the hell happened to you? And why didn't ya tell me so I could watch??" Remus whined towards the end.

"It was.. unexpected. But in short, Roman, Virgil and Patton happened." Janus said gesturing to various wounds.

"Shit. Did Thomas see it?"

"Yes, in fact he asked Roman to handle 'it'" Janus said tired. An 'it' what lows had he fallen to? The room began spinning and he clutched the counter.. no, don't you dare pass out.

"Damn, that makes a good nightmare! Blooding spilling from his chest and slowly picking his skin away, then suddenly-" Remus was cut off from his excited spiral by a thud on the linoleum kitchen floors. "Dee? Where the fuck- oh. OH SHIT! SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT! Don't fucking die, don't you fucking dare! Just.. um.. fuck!"

Double D was laying motionless on the ground, red spilling out around him. Remus wasn't much for fixing wounds but this is Dee. He's an exception. Remus hoisted the snake into a bridal carry, he's not exactly a heavy side, and laid him on the couch. Remus levitated the med kit as he wrapped gauze around the sword wounds close to the waist, and put a massive plaster on the dagger spot.

Janus' vision was blurred but clearing up. Fuck, he passed out. He looked to over to see a rare sight. Remus had a looked of concern and concentration on his face. It was almost nice to see him care like that.

"Dee! Don't ever fucking pass out on me again!" Remus said clutching Janus' upper arms. Janus winced involuntarily, causing pure concern to Remus' expression "Sorry, sorry."

"It's.. fine Remus. Let me handle it from here." Janus reached for the kit only to see his hands betray him by shaking in front of him.

"Nah, I think I got this. Also, did ya see your own hand?? Hell no."

"Ugh. Fine." Janus spat

"Now, where's the last juicy detail for tonight's revenge stabbing dream?"

"There, be gentle.. please?" Janus pointed to his left upper arm.

Then Remus found where the scales were missing. It was a massive spot of raw flesh where glistening green scales used to be, now bleeding like a waterfall. He worked more careful then he ever had in his life, slowly cleaning up until he found the source and wrapping it tight. Janus winced in response. and the gauze was loosened slightly. Red was already seeping through the bandage to the surface despite three layers of wrapping.

"I'm gonna kick that froggy ass into the fucking sun, this shit is a) my god damn territory, b) fucking overkill as hell and c) done to my lover- friend. yes.." Remus' cheeks flushed slightly.

"Ah.. your lover? Is that what you want us to be?" Janus smirked

"Shut up, you ding-dong ditched death." Remus crossed his arms and turned away

"We can't die, darling. I would've just.. been an emblem for a bit."

"Don't call me 'darling like that.. and I know but... maybe I need someone to talk to sometimes." Remus was clearly struggling for words.

"Right, of course. You totally don't pet names in spite of the many you've given myself and others."

"I- Well- SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Remus spat out, flustered. "I'm gonna go work on my nightmare. So... just... stop it.!?"

Remus rushed out of the room, slamming his door moments later. Leaving Janus alone on the ratty, piece of cloth, patches and stuffing they called a couch. He lifted himself to be upright, with some difficulty and at last stood up to go to his room.

He treaded over and gently closed the door behind him. It was a shame his dominant hand would now be more difficult to use. He put on a loose yellow t-shirt, some fresh trousers to sleep in and put away his gloves, hat, capelet, and bloodstained shirt and pants. Laundry was going to interesting and he would have to sew up those holes. That was for later though. Janus could afford a bit of time for a nap before getting to his actual duties.

-------

After roughly an hour, Remus' Magnum- go-fuck-yourself-Patton-Opus was perfectly gory and grotesque. He went to tell Jany in the living room, but he wasn't there. He felt a panic in his chest, and almost went to pummel his brother for stealing an nearly-corpse, when he thought maybe that hypocrite went to his room and pushed it instead of resting on the couch.

Remus opened the door, and saw Dee taking a nap, with an alarm set. Hypocrite. Remus turned off the alarm, and darted his eyes before landing a small peck on Dee's head. Damn, his skin is fucking soft, how the hell? Shit- he's moving! Go. Run. Hecanneverknow. RUN

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thesnakeslibrary · 3 months

Text

Movie Night Abandonment

Pairing: Janus x Remus, platonic moxiety implied Genre: Hurt/Comfort Tags/Warnings: selfharm (cutting), kissing, toxic creativitwins, Janus needs a hug and gets one Summary: Janus feels sad over not being invited to the weekly movie night, Remus fixes it.

Janus closed his bedroom door after stepping inside and sighed, frustrated. The others had a movie night, and didnt invite him? They invited Remus! But not him? Why was he even surprised. Of course they didnt invite him. He was Deceit. He was the lord of lies. No wonder they didnt invite him. He still wasn't welcome. Go figure.

He removed his hat, set it on his dresser amongst piles of books, and strode over to his bed. He flopped down onto it and let out another sigh. “Do they really not care about me?” Janus muttered aloud to himself. He scoffed to himself “Of course they don't…” He wanted to be mad, he really did but he couldn't ignore the stinging pain in his heart. He sat up and looked down at his covered arms, humming quietly. He knew he shouldn't, he made a promise to Remus, But just a few couldn't hurt, right? Janus swung his legs over the side of his bed and stood, walking into the bathroom connected to his room.

He rolled up his sleeves as he walked and opened the cabinet above the sink, grabbing his blood-stained razor. He closed and locked the door and put the toilet lid down, sitting on top of it. He took a breath and put the razor to his wrist, which was already littered with scars, and pressed down, swiping it across his arm. He reached over to grab a tissue and place it on his thigh to catch any fallen drops of blood. He looked down at his arm and smiled at the blood flowing out of the wound.

He made a few cuts alongside the first and patted it dry with a tissue, tossing it into the trash after. Now feeling much better, Janus stood and grabbed bandages, wrapping his arm. He rolled his sleeves back down and put his razor back in its hiding place. He sighed as he closed the cabinet before letting out a yelp at the sudden knocking on his bedroom door. “Deedee? I wanna hang out! Oh, we can dissect something and paint with its blood!” Remus giggled as he knocked on the door again “Cmoooon!!” Janus unlocked the bathroom door and walked out, opening his bedroom door. Remus grinned and quickly grabbed Janus’ arm to tug him along, said side cursing under his breath at the pain and discomfort.

Remus cocked his head like a confused puppy and looked at his arm. “Did you get hurt, Jan?” Before Remus could lift his sleeve, Janus pulled his arm away from him “No im fine.” He winced at Remus’ hurt expression as he realized. “DeeDee…Did you cut?” He took a step closer and gently took Janus’ hands in his own, squeezing them. Janus wanted to lie but he knew Remus wouldn't believe him if he tried, so he sighed and nodded, looking down. Remus frowned and pulled Janus into a hug. “Can you tell me why, baby?” Contrary to popular belief, Remus could actually be serious when he wanted to. Janus wrapped his arms around Remus tightly.

“It's stupid but…I was upset that the others didnt invite me to the movie night.” Janus admitted, feeling ashamed that he hurt himself over something so silly. Remus furrowed his brow and looked at Janus “Roman said you didnt wanna come.” Janus looked up at him with an angry expression “He never asked me.” Now it was Remus’ turn to be upset. He did want to beat Roman's ass, but he knew he couldn't leave his snake without comfort. He took a deep breath to calm himself down before pressing a kiss to Janus’ forehead. “I'll talk to him later, right now my double dee needs cuddles.” Before Janus could protest his pet name, he was being picked up and tossed onto his bed with a giggle from both him and Remus. They both knew “talking” actually meant possible violence. Remus joined him on the bed and gathered Janus up in his arms, showering his face in wet kisses. Janus let out quiet giggles and tried to cover his face to no avail. He tried to ignore the feeling of how stupid he was to have cut instead of having gone to Remus, who was making him feel much better already.

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Remus barged into his brother's room holding his morning star “Alright bitch wanna tell me why you left Janus out of movie night?” Roman looked over at him, currently painting his nails. “Remus, I did no such thing, he said he didnt wanna come.” Remus took a deep breath to calm down and leaned on the doorframe “You never even asked him, so before you can try to lie some more despite how much you berate Janus for lying, im gonna cut to the chase. We’re going to have another movie night today, and Janus is joining.” He said it in a way that left no room for argument, causing Roman to sigh.

“Fine, he can come.” “And we’re watching scooby doo.” “What, why?” “It's Janus’ favorite movie.” Roman huffed and waved Remus away “Fine fine now let me finish painting my nails.” Remus smiled and rested his morning star on his shoulder “Perfect!” He turned to leave but paused to say one more thing “And dear brother of mine, if this happens again, I won't be so nice.” Before he could listen to Roman's response, he closed the door behind him.

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Janus stood in front of his mirror in his scooby-doo onesie, nervous about being seen by the others in it. Remus walked over to him and rested his hands on Janus’ hips “You look great, Snack Mamba” Janus rolled his multicolored eyes and turned around, looking up at Remus “Are you sure im welcome?” Remus pulled Janus close to him and cupped his cheek. Softness from Remus was something only reserved for Janus. “Im sure” Janus took a deep breath and nodded, turning his head to kiss Remus’ hand. “Can you actually wear clothes this time?” Remus groaned “But wheres the fun in that!” Janus sighed “You can wear the gore onesie” Remus’ eyes lit up “Yes!” He giggled as he fist-bumped the air

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Janus took a deep breath and walked into the light sides living room in his onesie, ignoring Roman's snort and the following smack from Remus. Janus sat next to Remus who proceeded to pull him into his lap, the snake squeaking quietly before settling. He leaned back into Remus’ chest, smiling softly as the movie started. Roman was already talking about the quality, Patton was clinging to Virgil whenever something scary happened, Logan periodically commented on how it's stupid that Scooby can talk, Remus kept saying what monsters he would wanna fuck, and Janus, Janus was happy in Remus’ arms.

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