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anxi-aashi · 2 months

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ok i dont have the energy to put this into a fic rn but i CANT stop thinking about college au! childe almost walking in on you while you're getting yourself off.

like he'd still knock of course, but it would scare the absolute shit out of you. instead of hanging out with your roommates that he's friends with (who are most certainly NOT gathered in your room) he'd be all "hey pookie can i come bother you I'm bored," while you're fully sat on a dildo.

and bc you wouldnt want to seem suspicious, you'd say sure, just a sec! and immediately run to throw the sopping wet toy into your bathroom sink before letting him in.

and he's just too observant for his own good. "hey you ok? you seem out of breath" yeah because you were.... working out! "really? you're not sweating though?" CHILDE DROP IT OMFG but he wouldn't. he just asks so many goddamn questions and you honestly can't tell if he's just fuckign with you or if he's just genuinely concerned for you. what were you doing? pilates? so thats why you're walking a bit weird? how tf were you not sweating after pilates? oh you just started? well sorry to interrupt!

yeah.... you're sorry too -_-

but hes here now so you offer to watch a movie and hang out, nevermind the cum threatening to run down your leg. "sure! you pick smth out and ill go to the bathroom real quick!" he says and curse your post-orgasm clouded mind for not being quick enough to warn him bc now he's standing in front of you, dildo in his hand, looking at you knowingly.

youre mortified obviously. the two of you are cordial but not THAT close and god you can almost picture the slick and cum that's smearing all over his hand now. why is he holding it for fucks sake???

childe wouldnt be merciful either -- this is a fucking gold mine for him. "well, i guess this is a workout" and you would like the earth to swallow you up so that you don't have to look at him with that shit-eating grin that's creeping up his face.

hed switch the dildo to his other hand and start opening and closing his fingers together, making webs of cum string in between. "you said you just started?" no, you'd have to refute, that part was a lie.

"and you were getting off with this?" and now WHAT was that supposed to mean bc there was truly nothing wrong with the dildo size!!! it was perfectly fine, it did its job. sure it could be a tad bit longer, but you had bills to pay. he lets it go (with a judgemental eyebrow raise), but when he opens his mouth again to ask "what were you doing?" you almost wish he had kept making fun of your tiny ass toy. "were you using your hands or the suction cup?"

god he'd have a dangerous look on his face by now, lidded eyes looking at you like you were gonna be his next meal; pitching his voice just a tad bit lower just to see you squirm.

"you don't have to answer, but i would really, really like to know." aaaaaand there it goes. there's goes the last bit of your sanity bc huhh?? huuuuhh??? dear lord i would fully melt into a puddle we love a man that can make consent sexy.

fuck it, right? yeah, you were using the suction cup. "yeah? you like riding dick?" SHFBAN;DNSJF;F GODDDD

"you got any other toys?" yes sirrr yes I do, got a vibrator right over there in the nightstand. and duh now he's gotta follow up with "ever use both?"

which you have. who hasn't? but you usually only use it for quickies, you say. don't want it to be over too fast, ya know?

but then. thennnnnn he'd hit you with this: "you still horny?"

lorddddd you have NO idea, but you don't say that lest it get to his head (but lets be honest, he knows what he's doing; he knows how desperate he's making you). so he walks up to you, finally, and hands you your dildo, all sticky and starting to dry by now.

"well don't stop on my account."

and he plops down on your bed, manspreading just the tiiiiiniest bit to where you can see the tent in his pants.

which is how you find yourself back in your desk chair, thighs burning from fucking yourself on a dildo you now know is much smaller than whatever childe is packing while he just watches, palming his cock over his pants.

anyways gonna go work on my wips now lolololololololoolo

#snail.writes #snai.rambles #childe x reader #childe #tartaglia x reader #tartaglia #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact #childe smut #tartaglia smut #genshin impact smut

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gamarancianne · 3 months

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Hii I just read your rules and i think every thing is altight 🎀.I have benn carving some angst and had this idea for Helion x reader from acotar, where they have been with each other for a long time (before he became a High Lord), he says that he wants an open relationship, at first the reader agrees, after the years go by and Lady Autum heppens, she starts to be colder to Helion and becoms insecure about their relationship. Fast forward Helion throws a ball where someone start to flirt with him even though the reader is literally on his arm, he goes for some drinks or whatever which gives the reader the chance to escape, she does. After an hour or so Helion notices she is gone, and starts to look for her, he cant find her untill he asks a gaurd, who tells him she went to their bedroom, he finds her at first he is playfull but then relizes something is wrong. I would love if Helion said something like " you can't just leave me, I love you and we are together you cant do that, pleas" while crying hard. You can finish it however you like, presonaly a lot of angst and groveling at Helions side. If you dont fell like writing it there is no hard feelings❤️❤️❤️

Helion x reader - Always yours, never mine part 1

Hiiii, thank you for being this nice and don't worry i wrote it because I really loved the idea and there isn't enough Helion stuff here so let's change that ! 💗

Summary: in your open relationship, Helion always sneaked around with everyone, while you stayed there, waiting for him. But that was before, because solstice is the day where you are going to change that.

Warnings: angst, arrogant Helion (tbh he can 😩), heartbreak for 400 years, curse words, not proofread, my English.

Note: I didn't expect it to be this long so I'm definitely doing a part 2 ! I hope there was enough angst for you my dear and again thank you for your request and nice word !

"Everyone is looking for the sun"

"The moon only shines thank to the sun"

You had been his for 400 years. Being 550 year-old it was almost your whole life. But him, he had never been yours. In the beginning of your relationship, Helion and you had agreed that you both still could have dates or sleep with others. Well Helion had decided, and you desperately in love, had agreed. It was then an open relationship, Helion went out with other males and females, sometimes both, and you, well, you had been on dates to play by the same rules but hadn't really appreciated it. You didn't want them , you wanted and still want Helion, only him. Of course you had your moments, heated or not, together but it wasn't a proper relationship like you could dream of. It could have been okay if you weren't aware of every time he brought a lover to his Palace and didn't heard them both from dusk till dawn, but you were and you did. Oh yes you did. Like the one time of the high lord meeting when he had flirted with Mor, and had sleeped with her, asking you to go to another room. Sometimes some females even came to him while you were dancing or cuddling together and had the guts to seduce him in front of you. The pain you felt really started when he started sneaking around with the lady of autumn when he wasn't high lord yet. He then started to forget you, the one who had been truly there for him in every moment of his life, and you became insecure. It was mentally and emotionally exhausting. But you couldn't leave him (if you still were in a relationship), you loved him too much it hurt you and it would kill you to do so.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Today was the first day of the summer solstice festivities. It was a day full of colors, sun, dances, music, food; your favourite day of the year. But not today, you didn't feel well. Yesterday Helion had brought 2 females in his bed, and your room being next to his, you had heard them. You hadn't sleep, overthinking the fact that you and Helion hadn't slept or been on a date together since weeks, even months. Maybe you didn't have to go today, you could stay in your room, looking from your window to the happy people partying and laughing. That's what you would do today, drown yourself in your eating thoughts and cry yourself to sleep. What a program. In front of your mirror, you changed your sun dress for a nightgown and went back to you giant bed. As if hearing your thoughts, someone knocked at the door. Groaning you opened it and what surprise for you to see the said Helion, a flirty smirk on his lips, leaning against the door frame. Gods was he beautiful. You almost hated him fro that, it made every discussion with him very difficult for you. His smile dropped as soon as he saw you in an other outfit than your party dress.

"What's going on love? At this hour you are normally already dressed up, dancing with everyone ?" He asked.

"Well I suppose it is not a normal day then" you answered turning your back to him when he tried to reach for you. You instantly regretted you gesture.

"Are you sure everything's okay love ?"

You turned back and gave him a small smile to reassure him, you always adored when he called you love, you could never resist him. "Yes don't worry, I am just feeling unwell, I think I'll stay here today and rest a little."

He froze, never had you ever missed a solstice day.

"No, no, no. Go dress up dear, I'm sure a dance with me will give you your energy and joy back." His teeth showed up again when he flashed you a smile.

"What? No-"

"And I won't take no as an answer" he shouted when he closed the door to leave you alone in the silence of your room once again. Dressing up again, you cursed him for being this convincing and yourself for being this weak. And why would he show up exactly the moment you gathered a little courage to face him about your feelings ! But maybe this time he would change, and everything would be different. You had so much hope about him. Leaving your room, you frowned and searched him in the crowd. You relaxed when you smelt his now well-known scent invading your nose and felt his arms circling your waist.

"What's going on in that pretty head of yours"

"Nothing really" I answered getting out of his grasp leaving him frowning a little.

He regained his composure quickly "Then let's dance dear."

You both walked to the dancefloor and pushed someone or two on the way. As the music began, Helion led the dance, and you followed, twirling at the beautiful notes. To anyone who looked at you, it seemed that you were two beautiful gods or angels, coming from the sky and flying in the sun. Two gods meant for eachother. But Helion didn't think that, nor did you, spiralling in your insecure thoughts and doubts about yourself. But you still danced for hours, leaving the crowd only to drink or eat.

Exceptionally, you both went out in the gardens, arm in arms and hand in hand to talk intimately a little. But unfortunately, your finally rediscovered happiness was short timed when a young fae lady approached you two. Well she approached him of course. She was everything you weren't, gorgeous, a bright smile, tall, thin. Indeed, how could Helion could really love you after people like her ? Then again he abandoned you again to yourself. And almost broke down in front of everybody when you saw them dance together, and cursed yourself once again the same day for being so stupid to think that one ridiculously charming cheeky smile from him would change anything. You ran away to your bedroom, tears streaming down your face as the pain was stinging your entire body. When you loved, you loved hard, with your soul, your body, you whole. But when you felt hurt then everything in you was heart, and there wasn't a single part you that was okay.

You cried and cried on your bed without even taking the time to step out the beautiful gown you wore today. A gown he had gifted you. Damn him ! Everything you did, everything you thought about reminded you of him! He was like oxygen and water for you, a living need, everything in you was attracted by him every single second of your whole life. It was at the same time making you breathe fresh air, and killing you.

Helion, him, noticed you missing only a few dances later with that young lady when he had the project to bring her back into his bed for a sleepless night. He had the intention to inform you not to wait for him but he couldn't find you. In the heat of his moment with his futur lover, he got upset at the fact that you somehow ruined it, and grew more and more frustrated. He excused himself to the lady and went quickly and furiously to your room after asking a guard about it. There wasn't an ounce of worry in his mind.

But when he found your door open, and heard your not so silent sobs, he calmed down a little and came to your bed. Feeling his weight on the other side of the bed, you stood up quickly and wiped, in vain the tears on your cheeks.

"You crying just ruined my tonight date you know ?" Helion chuckled thinking it would make you feel better.

But in the contrary, you snapped at him and lashed out all your feelings and emotions piled up and invalidated since 400 years. Enough was enough.

"How dare you say that to the only woman who have been supporting you for every damn moment of your life? How dare you hurt my feelings and my confidence again and again and again ? During those 400, I've given you all that I had even more, I've given you all from myself : my soul, my heart, my mind and my body. But what have you given me back ? Nothing, except a broken heart and insecurity that's eating me up every fucking day of my life ! A life now resumed to hope that someday you will understand what I'm going through, you will change for the better ! But no ! It's always the same thing ! I hope and hope for you but you still disappoint me at the end of the day going back to your bitches while I stay here, abandoned again by the love of my life, the only one in my mind, you. I'm tired and exhausted to feel empty every time I see you with another while you forget about me. Some even seduce you while I'm here with you !"

Helion froze at your words, never as he ever considered or thought that you could be unwell in this relationship. "But what didn't you say anything? Plus you had also the right to go with other males or females, let me recall we both agreed to those terms in the beginning of our relation-"

"No we didn't! You said it, and I was hopelessly in love with you so it was the better I could get from you ! And I tried and tried and tried to go on other dates but they were never you ! As telling you this, I can't because everytime I see you apart from heated moment, when I try to speak to you about it, another one of your numerous lover interrupt us and you don't care about it one bit! It's like I'm only there to sleep with you and nothing more where as you go on dates and give your lovers prince princess treatment ! So tell me ! What did I do to deserve that ? What did I do ? Because I am completely and utterly yours, but Helion you have to face it, you were never mine." Rage and frustration tears were flooding your face from your angry eyes, and you were out of breath.

"Are you breaking up with me ?" He asked softly.

"Oh gods I can't believe it ! It's the only thing you have to say right now ? After all I've told you ? Then yes, yes I'm breaking up with you ! I'm done with this, with you !"

"But you can't do this love ! Please you can't leave me we are together! I love you please! Don't do that !" He pleaded and kneeled in front of you, gripping your thighs.

"As much as I love you, and as it's hurting to do so, I can't do this anymore, I don't know who I am anymore. Every time I woke up, my goal was to make you change or to spend a little time with you ! I've been erasing myself to the thought of you and I need to get out of here in order to find myself again. I'm sorry."

"But where will you go ? You live here ? It's your home! I am your home !" He cried.

"Not anymore I'm sorry. And Mor will welcome me for a time, I already sent a note to Rhys, he'll come when my stuff will be packed." As my voice broke down on the final words that seemed too real for me, I wanted it to be a nightmare, and to wake up tangled in the sheets and his arms, I got out of his firm grasp difficultly and gathered my things.

Rhys appeared instantly, and I took one last look at Helion's bent form and wet eyes before we disappeared as quickly as he came, in smoke of black shadow.

#helion x reader #helion acotar #acotar x reader #acotar #acotar x you #helion x you #rhysand #day court #writers on tumblr #angst

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fatuismooches · 1 year

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With the release of Scara's drip marketing, I cant help but imagine him just wandering Teyvat and keeping his lover's letter with him. When he found it, the ending implied that he wanted to ascend to godhood so he can forsake his mortal emotions. However, after it didnt work out as he hoped and he gains an anemo vision, I wonder how he would feel about it all now? You also implied reincarnation au so what if after decades of wandering, the star-crossed lovers finally meet again??

Related to this piece and this piece…

Scaramouche fidgets with his Anemo vision more often than not, placed over his heart, a reminder of something that was finally his. More importantly, your final letter is kept carefully tucked underneath the vision as well. Sometimes, during the night he carefully reopens the letter to read it, the fold marks deeply imprinted at this point, yet there is no other damage to it. It seems that the letter has been painstakingly taken care of.

He thinks back to how he tried to erase his past, to erase you. He was foolish to do so (something the God of Dendro reaffirmed) but the pain of your early departure threw all reason out the window. You deserve an apology, he thinks. But you were no longer here for him to do so, something that he is all too aware of, as the nightmares still cut him open some days.

(But, while Scaramouche was under Nahida's care, she blessed him with sweet dreams whenever he had nightmares. She did not know who or what he dreamed of, but she assumed it must be someone he holds very dear, from the fact his face became peaceful in an instant.)

Often times he also wonders how you’d react to his Anemo vision. It would be so much easier for you to travel - he would just hold you and control the wind to levitate. Scaramouche imagines the wind blowing your hair all crazily as you gasp down at how high the two of you were up. He would summon a gust of air to throw all of your wet clothes into the air to dry and then make you beg for him to release them. He would-

He quickly sat up and began to get ready for the day again. Going down that path of longing again wasn’t going to be any good for him. He had been wandering Teyvat for decades, experiencing what every nation had to offer, indulging in his freedom. The traveler had been long gone from this world, so he did not have many close connections anymore.

Though, as much as he hated to admit it, the Dendro Archon had become… somewhat of a familial figure to him. So when she sent him a letter, beckoning him to come back to Sumeru for a visit, he was inclined to listen. What’s more, he was intrigued by the last sentence - ‘There’s someone here I think you’d want to meet.’

Port Ormos was still lively, the hustle and bustle had become somewhat comforting to him. He walked through the city, drinking in the familiar scent of delicious cuisine, and the rhythmic footsteps of dancers and singers. Scaramouche made his way to where Nahida was, more interested than ever to see what she wanted.

“Oh, I see you made it, Wanderer!” Her soft and welcoming voice did not change even after all the years. “How has your travel been? Eye-opening, I hope?”

The two chatted for a bit before Nahida smiled at him. “The person I told you about is about to come. But, you have to promise me you won’t do anything rash, okay?”

Scaramouche looked at her with a mixture of confusion and suspicion but agreed nonetheless. A soft knock on the door drew his attention. But what made him become still was the familiar voice that resonated from beyond the door.

No. No. It couldn’t be. Nahida glanced at him. “Come in!”

And there you were. The same curl of your lips when you were smiling nervously, the habit of yours to flip your eyes to his face and then the floor.

“Um… hello there. Lesser Lord Kusanali has informed me that you’ll be my partner for the daycare that’s recently been built. I hope we can get to know each other better!”

For the first time in archons knows when the surprise he felt was hard to shake. His chest started to pulse as emotion twisted up inside of him.

“Hello…?”

“Ah, sorry about that. He’s just a little out of it today. Could you wait outside for a bit? He’ll come to meet you there.”

“O-oh. Of course, Lesser Lord Kusanali,” you nodded your head and quickly scurried out of the room.

“That… that was, they’re really… back. They’re here,” the miracle had the puppet choked up. Tears began to well up and he stubbornly rubbed them away. He had somewhat grown to accept this feeling. After all, you were the only person who could invoke it now.

Nahida rubbed his back and comforted him. “I know. As soon as I heard of them, I knew it was the one you loved from so long ago. Please, spend as much time as you want here and with them. You deserve it.”

He quietly thanked her and got up to find you. The feeling that he had once forsaken, the one that made his face warm and chest stir, began to rise within him again…

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #scaramouche x reader #kunikuzushi x reader #scaramouche fluff #scaramouche genshin #genshin impact scaramouche #scaramouche angst #scaramouche drabble #scaramouche headcanons #scaramouche fanfic #fatui harbingers x reader #genshin fluff #genshin angst

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arson-09 · 3 months

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A court of frost and starlight is (subjectively) the worse book in the sjm world. Especially when it comes to mental illness

The first half of chapter 11 is fucking disgusting. I think i geniunely hate sjm a little after this chapter.

Rhysand is literally kicking a man while hes down. Tamlin is depressed. Hes not taking care of himself or his home and is clearly at rock bottom. His home is empty and as stated at the end of the chapter theres no wards around his manor to protect him

"But as I winnowed away, the dark wind ripping through me, a strange sort of hollowness took root in my stomach. Tamlin didn't have shields around the house. None to prevent anyone from winnowing in, to guard against enemies appearing in his bedroom and slitting his throat. It was almost as if he was waiting for someone to do it."

I can quote the entire chapter to point and say HEY THIS IS FUCKING GROSS WRITING! She worte a clearly depressed and ill man but hey! its okay rhysand said really bad shit to him because we LOVE rhysand in this house! to qoute feyre hes usually the bigger male so hes entitled to a slipup!

except hes not. thats not a slip up thats purposefully trying to trigger a man you know has anger issues so you have an excuse to kill him. That is quite literally what kids used to do to me when i was younger, thats being a fucking bully. Rhysand is not a good person, quite the opposite actually. Rhysand also states that "he had been given everything and squandered it." which is not completely true! (Given tamlins backstory and how he feels about being high lord so *loud incorrect buzzer*) Rhysand is an extremely unreliable narrator. Example from this chapter? Rhysand asks where "his dear friend" lucien is and Tamlin tells him hes hunting and the following happens

“Hunting for our dinner.” “No taste for such things these days?” Tamlin’s eyes remained dull. “He left before I was awake.” Hunting for dinner- because there were no servants here to make food. Or buy it. I couldn’t say I felt bad for him. Only for Lucien, once again stuck with being his crony.

Where did this come from? Tamlin said lucien left before he was awake. He didnt ask him to do that.

Rhysand proceeds to purposefully say stuff to make Tamlin angry so they can fight and is surprised when Tamlin just tells him to leave. Then chapter 23 does nothing to help this. Wow tamlin has completely isolated himself after rhysand fucked him up more. But its fine cause rhysand made him dinner and got people to patrol the border.

It really hurts. I have so many of the same mental health issues as Tamlin. Seeing sjm do nothing with this but add more stigma just sucks. Yes Tamlin fucks up in acomaf (even if i cant fully comprehend that one sjm) but that isn't excuse to do this horrific mental health shit.

I am open to discussion about this more! if we have opposite opinions that okay! if you love this series to death that's great for you! as long as your at least somewhat polite I'm chill with it. If your rude i will be mean on the internet.

#acotar #a court of thorns and roses #rhysand #sarah j maas #tamlin #pro tamlin #anti rhysand #rhysand is quite literally my childhood bullies #i mean tamlin and i became bullies too because people kept provoking us #sjm critical #book opinions #mental health rep in books #acofas #a court of frost and starlight

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kiibichio · 2 months

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PLAY DATE 2. 𐙚 ❤︎ M. STURNIOLO

OVERVIEW ;; you and matt get into a heated argument over your ‘friends with benefits’ deal, how will it end ?? (good ending i promise)

CONTAINS ;; angst, fluff, good ending !! (that’s it?)

momo speaks ;; PART TWO OF THISSS. this was so fun to writeee. I HOPE U GUYS REALLY LIKED IT BC I WORKED HARDD MAN I WAS BREAKING A SWEAT OVER HERE (but kinda rushed). enjoy !! (PART ONE HERE <33)

date published ;; 02.20.24

not proofread !!

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6:49 pm.

“are you serious? you just told me you ‘missed me so much’, but you’re letting me leave just like that? am i just some sort of play date to you?” i ask, sitting up. anger, sadness and confusion written all over my face.

maybe i shouldn’t have said that.

matt goes silent for a while, then speaks up.

“you do realize that when we started this we both mutually agreed to have no feelings right?” he says, trying to keep his cool

“well- i mean yeah, but-” i try to speak

“then what makes you think i want to be something more?” he cuts me off. he stands up and starts to get dressed.

“matt. good fucking god, i mean you just have sex with me that damn near kick me out?”

tears start filling my eyes. shit.

“yeah!” he exclaims sarcastically “i do because when we established this, i told you i didnt want a fucking relationship. we’re just friends that just so happen to fuck.” matt raises his voice at me.

then the water works break. goddammit.

i wipe my eyes before speaking up, “okay then… if that’s how you want it to be, then we can end this shit right fucking now. im not gonna allow myself to be used like some damn sex toy.”

“wait.. y/n- c’mon i didn’t mean it like that.” matt tries to explain, regretting what he had just said.

“oh no. i fully understand what you meant,” i reply, now getting dressed.

“fuck..” he mumbles under his breath, but still loud enough for me to hear.

“that’s all you have to say?” i stand up after putting my shoes on, crossing my arms in front of the bedroom door.

matt goes silent.

“oh, what? we’re mute now? real cute.” i ask sarcastically before storming out the room. he follows behind me, trying to explain himself with ‘y/n this!’ and ‘y/n that!’ but i easily tune him out.

as i reach the front door, it starts to open.

it’s just chris and nick, i give a small wave and quickly pass by them and start walking to my house.

ill be damned if i ever let somebody treat me like this shit again.

——————————————————————————————

an hour later, i get a knock on my door. dear lord, who is it now? i walk over to the front door and open it.

matt’s on the other side.

“hey.. forgot your phone…” he says sheepishly, handing it over to me.

“mhm. thanks.” i answer. i start to close the door before he pushes it open again.

“can i… come in?” he asks

“why? so you can screw me over again? no thanks.”

“y/n. im serious. please?”

i can tell he’s serious, but im still hesitant.

i sigh and open the door wider to let him enter.

he makes his way to the couch, while i lock the door and follow behind him, but sitting on the opposite side of him.

there’s a few moments of uncomfortable silence.

“just gonna sit there?”

he lets out a deep breath, “listen, i’m sorry for yelling at you earlier. i didn’t take your feelings into consideration and i clearly wasn’t thinking in that moment.” matt explains sincerely.

“i accept your apology. and i understand, but now that my secrets out, we cant keep doing this. it’s just- not.. right.” i shake my head

“that’s another thing i wanted to talk about. it’s not that i don’t like you.. i do- it’s just…” he sighs

“what, matt? you can talk to me. we’re still friends.” i speak. i move closer to him and put my hand on top of his.

“ive been extremely busy lately. flying back and forth, videos, podcasts, everything. its just a lot to handle and im not sure im ready for commitment. so its not a no.. its just a ‘not now.’” he looks at me.

after he said that, i felt like a weight lifted off my shoulders. i needed that sense of reassurance. but now i feel like the asshole. i should’ve thought about him too.

“that’s perfectly fine, matt. i can handle that.” i start to smile, “ill wait for you, matt. take as much time as you need.”

he hugs me and i can feel his face growing into a soft smile against my shoulder.

“thank you, y/n.”

4 months later ;;

“matt! baby, i missed you so much!!” i say, leaping in his arms as he walks out into the airport parking lot towards my car. i attack him with kisses all over his face and hug him just a bit too tight.

“too tight, my love.” he says almost out of breath.

“it’s not my fault, this is the first time you’ve ever left me like this! i just really, really missed you.” i exclaim, letting go of him.

“you’re so extra.” he chuckles

okay that first part was a partial lie, but it really is the first time he’s gone back to boston without his girlfriend of 2 months!

“can you two get a room? good fucking god.” nick says disgusted, chris nodding his head and agreeing with his brother.

me and matt both shoot them the middle finger and continue walking to the car.

he grabs my hand, “i missed you too, though baby. i was thinking about you the whole time. and…” he continues to tell me how much he had missed me and loves me.

best boyfriend ever.

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momo speaks (again) ;; ugh this was really rushed im sorry if it sucks 😭😭 BUT I GOT IT DONE. love you guys <3 hope you enjoyed !! TOODLES xx

tag list ;; @sturniolos-blog @mayhem-72 @hearts4chris 🍵

#matt sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo x reader #youtube #youtuber #fan fiction #fan fic writing #fanfic #fandom #sturniolo fluff #kiibichio

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not-to-me · 3 months

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Just Enjoying the View (DW One-Shot)

(Gif is mine)

Fourth Doctor x AFAB!reader | 18+ NO MINORS | I take requests! Actually, I beg for them!

Summary: The Doctor sees you as you’re picking out clothes after a shower.

Warnings: smut, slightly dubious consent at the very beginning (the Doctor being brash), AFAB reader, but only gender indicators referring to genitalia and breasts (wrote this for me and I’m trans masc), my likely lousy attempt at dirty talk, unprotected sex, not the softest not the roughest, slight degradation at one point, I’m not a native speaker either.

———

The hot water that cascaded down your body slowed to a stop as you turned off the shower. Walking over to your towel, folded and placed neatly on the counter, you started drying yourself off. You sighed as you became satisfied with your level of dryness, and wrapped the towel around your body.

You exited the steamy bathroom and headed into your room. Now, to find some clothes, you thought. Crossing your room, you headed for your wardrobe, a little walk-in closet. You stood there, sifting through the fabric of your options as you thought about what you wanted to wear. Maybe something that would make the Doctor look at you for an extra second or two… you smiled mischievously at the thought. You fancied him, it was true, but you also knew he was either too uninterested, too daft or too caught up in his own world to notice it. Still, one can try.

You pulled out a cute dress from the rack, one that you always felt sexy in, but then something else caught your eye as well, so you pulled a sleek suit out too and walked over to the mirror to try and see which you’d like most today. You looked at your reflection in the mirror as you held the dress up to your body, then the suit, then switched them back again, musing to yourself. Indecisive, you sighed and closed your eyes momentarily. When you opened them again, however, you made eye contact with a pair of intense blue eyes in the mirror.

The Doctor.

The Doctor was standing behind you, in the doorway. You froze, unsure of what to say as embarrassment flooded your mind at the same speed as thoughts of how long he’d been standing there did. You hadn’t noticed him when you left the bathroom. You opened your mouth to speak as you felt a few seconds of silence too many had passed, but he interrupted you.

“Oh, don’t mind me, I’m just enjoying the view!” he said, his signature unreadable grin present on his face. He was leaning on the doorframe, hands tucked into his pockets, looking like the epitome of casual. You? Not so much, as you were debating whether to hide away in your bed or chase the tall Time Lord out.

“Doctor… you cant just— why were you just standing there?!” You stuttered out your inquiry, your voice a slightly higher pitch than usual as you turned around to face him. You dropped the hangers with clothes you were holding in favour of clutching your towel tightly and securely to your body.

“Well, my dear, you seemed like you were quite focused on your… choice of attire,” His eyes swept over your body— or were you seeing things— before he continued, “And I thought I’d let you decide, rather than interrupt…” Something told you that was only half the truth as his eyes lingered on your exposed thighs.

“I— I am in a towel!” You exclaimed indignantly, gesturing to your current ‘outfit,’ though you couldn’t help but wonder what those darkening eyes truly meant.

“Yes, I see that…” the Doctor said lowly, beginning to approach slowly, watching for any sign that would tell him to back off, “Do you want to know what I’ve also seen, my dear?”

Your eyes widened at his ominous words. You didn’t know if you truly wanted to know, but you found yourself nodding meekly all the same. The Doctor’s grin grew wider as he closed in on you, and in a move that made your eyes even bigger for an entirely different reason, he reached up and brushed his knuckles against your cheek, caressing you tenderly. Then, his hand moved so the tips of his fingers rested at your temple, not unlike the few times he had helped you sleep using those psychic powers of his. And with that thought, you began connecting the dots. Your face had never been this hot. Yet… some these connections you were making did allude to the idea that the Doctor also wanted you. The very thought made your breath hitch.

“Ah, yes! I probably should have mentioned I’d be able to see some of those little thoughts of yours, before I helped you sleep.” His voice was deepened at the end of his sentence as he gazed at you with a fond expression, his grin having been softened by watching your cute face as you made your realisations.

“Now… the question is,” He trailed his hand down your face, caressing you, and parted your lips with his thumb, “Will you let me reciprocate those desires?”

Your heart was hammering away in your chest, not from fear, but from excitement. Your shaky breath fanned over the Doctor’s thumb when you answered him with a quiet, “Yes.”

The return of his grin was the only warning you got before his hand traversed further down, grabbing your towel and loosening it, taking advantage of your lowered guard, before letting it fall to the floor.

“Doctor!” you exclaimed as you tried to cover yourself, “Haven’t you ever heard of taking things slow?!”

“Hmm, I think not… We’ll have to try it some day!” he said, a teasing tone painting his words as he looked at you like he wanted to take you right then and there. And to be fair, he did. He quickly closed what little distance there was left between you two, grabbing your chin between a finger and a thumb to tilt your head up just enough for him to kiss you.

You felt a surge of desire in your core at his controlling actions, letting yourself melt into the kiss after a quiet, surprised sound. As he moved his slightly chapped lips against yours, his hands both landed on your body, feeling your warm skin under them. Once again, he couldn’t make himself take things slowly, so he deepened the kiss almost immediately, making you gasp by squeezing the soft flesh of your ass. His tongue explored your mouth, and you whined into the kiss, your hands having come up to grip the lapels of his coat. Despite his apparent dominance, you got the feeling he might’ve been out of practice, although he quickly relearned his old tricks.

He began to slowly walk you backwards, toward your twin sized bed. Once the back of your knees hit the mattress, he surprised you by roughly pushing you down, making you fall onto the soft bed. You gasped as you bounced slightly. The Doctor began swiftly taking off his scarf and coat, but made no further move to undress before advancing on you, settling his weight on top of you. He briefly resumed the kiss as he spread your legs with his and found his place between them. Then, he kissed his way down your throat and collarbones, nipping at your skin, until his mouth arrived at the softness of your tits. One big hand came up to squeeze one while his mouth descended on the other, rolling your nipple on his tongue. This turned out to be a good distraction, as he surprised you by running the fingers of his other hand through your wet folds. He groaned.

“Already wet? My, my, have you been neglected?” He mused, mostly to himself, as he continued to mouth at your breasts, leaving hickeys and bites. You only managed to whine in response as he delved a thick finger into your tight hole, working you open. He soon curled his finger, hitting that one special spot, and making you gasp and buck your hips. He started to hone in on that specific spot and all but abused it, wrenching cries and moans from your lips.

Another incarnation of the Doctor would’ve probably taken it one step further and gone down on you, but right then and there, the Doctor knew that he was much too impatient to do so. He would save that for when he wasn’t so ridiculously pent up. So with that thought, he added another finger, stretching you wider yet. His cock twitched in anticipation of your tightness.

The stretch tingled pleasurably and you spread your legs further as he pounded your heat with his fingers. Just when you thought his mere hand couldn’t make you feel any better, his thumb dropped down on your clit. Your hips twitched as you arched your back involuntarily and moaned. You breathing was starting to go quicker and quicker, more irregular, and the Doctor knew you were close to coming from just his hand alone. He grinned and stopped his movements, withdrawing his hand, and leaning back.

You whined at the loss and prepared to make a fuss, but when you opened your eyes, you saw that he had already freed his cock from his pants, which shut you up immediately. He stroked his dick intently as he looked at your wet and swollen cunt.

“Do you want this?” he asked in a low voice, before looking up at your eyes with his own, intense ones. For some reason, his question sent waves of heat throughout your body. Almost as if it solidified the fact that this was happening. So you happily nodded your head.

“Yes! Yes please, Doctor. Please fuck me.” And with that you leant up on your elbows to catch his lips in a chaste, but passionate kiss. He kissed you back, but soon took one of your tits in hand and squeezed, before pushing you down onto the bed once more. You gasped as you felt his cockhead at your entrance before the Doctor began teasing you by thrusting through your wet folds. He groaned at the feeling, but you whined and threw your head back against the pillow, craving more. He chuckled at your impatience. If he was any less impatient himself, he might have teased you further, but he needed to feel your walls around him soon.

Suddenly and without warning, he thrust inside you, giving you little time to get used to his considerable size. You practically cried out at the intrusion, though you quickly welcomed it with a moan. You were thankful he’d taken the time to prepare you, even just a little bit.

He drew in a sharp breath, and couldn’t help but buck his hips, sinking all the way inside your welcoming warmth.

“Ah, fuck… better than I imagined,” he said, pleasure tinting his voice. You could only clench tighter around him as you registered just what his words implied.

“And I can imagine quite a bit, my dear,” he said with a grin.

“Are you thinking about it? Me getting off to your image…” He chuckled breathlessly, then continued, “No, of course you aren’t. Fucked you dumb already, haven’t I?” He punctuated with a harsher thrust than the previous ones, making you squeal as you dug your nails into his back. You proved him right by only moaning and nodding weakly in response to his mostly rhetorical question.

Your moans and whimpers picked up in time with the rhythm of his hips. His thrusts had started out slow and deep, letting you really feel it every time he bottomed out, but then he started growing impatient with his pace.

His hips picked up speed, and soon he was hammering his cock into you, fucking you fast with no mercy. He grunted with the effort, his hands running over your body heavily. You were in ecstasy. You gripped his brown curls, needing something to hold onto during this onslaught.

“Doct—ah!” you moaned his name, not knowing many other words at this point. His name was followed by a series of whines and sobs, making him almost chuckle.

“Ohh… Is it too much? I know it’s a lot, I know,” He said to you in a condescending tone. Instead of giving you a chance to breathe, his hand slid down to your core and he began pleasuring your clit.

“Just keep taking it.”

You were overwhelmed with pleasure. Tears rolled down your cheeks, but still you pleaded with him for more. More of his cock inside you, more stimulation on your clit, more of his voice. You needed him and he provided.

The Doctor’s usually fluffy curls were damp with sweat, but they still bounced in tact with his hip movements. He looked so debauched, even still practically fully dressed. As you looked up at him with a fucked out expression, he admired your features. Your glazed over eyes and your moans and gasps. And your body, that he had dreamt of being underneath his, now tensing up.

You could feel your peak approaching fast. Your hand, still rooted in his hair, tightened its grip in anticipation of your coming high. The Doctor growled in response, quickly snatching your wrist and pinning it over your head, and your other wrist soon followed. He didn’t miss the extra pathetic yelp that escaped you, and his ministrations only increased in their roughness.

“I can tell you’re close… Do you want to cum for me? Yeah?” He asked his hips stuttering, alluding to his own impending high. You could only nod and gabble incoherent words. And had the Doctor been a more patient person, he might have made you wait til you could reply coherently, just for his own personal enjoyment. But his fourth incarnation was impatient more often than not, playing to your favour as you shook with pleasure.

“Cum for me… there you go. Fuck…” He squeezed your wrists tight for a second before letting them go, indicating you were to keep them where they were. You gripped the headboard as it all became too much and your climax washed over you, rendering you completely helpless against the searing ecstasy. Your scream could probably be heard throughout most of the vast TARDIS.

Before you could even begin to think properly, you felt the Doctor’s cock twitch inside your clenching cunt. He groaned as he spilled into your wet heat, and his hips rutted into you shallowly. You happily milked him of his seed. He dipped his head down to kiss your neck before burying his face, riding out his high. Eventually, he stilled his movements with a sigh.

After a few seconds of panting between the two of you, you let your arms fall around him, petting his hair and embracing him. He seemed to like that, nuzzling further into your neck. His weight on top of you was comforting nod you smiled dazedly to yourself. Then the Doctor popped up his head, looking at you with half lidded eyes.

“I bet you’ll need another shower now… and before you ask, yes, I would like to join you.” He grinned that signature grin. You only chuckled at him, but then you agreed nonetheless.

You wouldn’t mind some more intimacy with your Doctor.

#fourth doctor x reader #the doctor x reader #doctor who x reader #x reader #fourth doctor smut #Doctor who smut #smut #my fic

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cats-obsessions · 6 months

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Dark Urge/Gortash

Just a Drabble I cant get out of my head- Durge is able to recover more of his memories along his travels back to Baldurs Gate, and Orin doesn’t bother telling Gortash that her kin has returned.

“Hello, Lordling”

The Dark Urge, Son of Bhaal, Nox leans back against the old, mahogany desk in his dear friend, Gortash’s office where he’s been waiting, ever patiently, for the tyrant to arrive.

It’s luxurious to a point Nox had once found gaudy, but the room gives him a warm feeling in his chest now. Some parts of his memories echo through his empty brain as mere feelings and impressions. Some remain vivid, yet the bulk of what he could access shows glimpses of his life only in the months before Orin’s attack, but he knows they go deeper. Flashes of late night scheming, shared heists, interrogations, pools of blood, carefully plotted assassinations, then, the smell of avernus clinging to their skin amidst a first kiss. All of it went back to him- Gortash, not Bhaal. Not his fathers wishes or the Urge or even the temple. Everything in Nox’s empty brain was bringing him here.

He let his companions greet the new archduke on their own, but he watched from the shadows, the disappointment in Gortash’s eyes betraying the tyrant, but this was a meeting better had in privacy. The very same newly coronated archduke stands in front of him now for the first time in only the gods know how long.

“Fuck off,” Gortash grumbles, a tight frown on his face. The large double doors of the office swing closed behind him. As their eyes meet, Nox can see the extent of exhaustion that permeates the tyrant’s being. Circles much darker than usual shroud his near-black eyes. His hair had grown in the past two months, resting on his collarbones in disarray. Even the way he breathes sings of discontent.

Nox tilts his head, unmoving from his spot on the lord’s desk “Not the welcome home I was hoping for. I can understand your anger, but-”

“-Orin” the duke hisses sharply, “I have better things to do than this. As do you. Make yourself useful for once.”

Orin. Something in Nox’s chest sinks with the realization, “She’s been mocking you with my face? Gods- I’m going to kill that inbred little bitch the second I see her” he growls.

That earned a raised eyebrow from Enver, but the duke keeps wary eyes trained on his assassin “I’m not playing your games this time” he sighs.

“I assure you, Enver, I am not here to play games.”

Nox watches as Gortash moves across the room to his liquor cabinet against the wall, fine wood gilded in gold. The duke’s eyes stay trained on him, even as he begins to pour a glass of fine, amber whiskey. “Yes, yes, you will slash me in two, bathe in my blood, and what was it-” Gortash pauses to take a long, slow sip, sighing once again “-wear my intestines as a scarf? No matter- all the same, uncouth drabble with you.”

“Not until the end. And not like that. I won’t kill you until- unless we are the last two living in all the realm. First you, then me.” Nox clenches his fingers, his jaw tightening and untightening as he feels the images of Enver’s death set in behind his eyes. The Urge whispers for him to take the Banite now, but he knows better. He takes a slow, deep breath, reaching instinctively to the band around his wrist. He focuses on the feelings to ground himself for a moment before continuing. “I believe that was the promise I made you before- Well, things are hazy- a lobotomy does that to you.”

Enver stops, his glass half raised to his lips as his eyes widen. Nox can nearly see his thoughts, debates. He’s questioning if Orin could have such knowledge, if Orin could keep calm this long in a conversation, if Orin could push down her Urge. Nox gives a lopsided smile as he continues. “I don’t remember everything, but I remember you. I came back for you- to stand by you. As we are meant to be.”

It only takes a few seconds for Gortash to cross the room, his glass crashing into the golden tray below it, well abandoned; and Nox smiles, allowing his shirt collar to be grasped tightly in the duke’s hands. Gortash crowds his space, leering at him. There’s venom in his expression, but just below that lies hope.

“Prove it or die.”

How many times had Orin tried this? How many times did she dangle Nox in front of Enver? Did she pretend to return to him just like this? Or simply take his form to berate the tyrant lord? The thought makes the teifling’s blood boil. But he will save that rage for later.

Nox huffs out a chuckle, “If I were Orin, I would have my fucking dagger, and this goddamn tadpole wouldn’t be in my head, Enver.”

His words are enough, and Gortash yanks the collar of his shirt forward until they are pressed against each other, their lips colliding in a rough, forceful kiss that dissolves into desperation. For Nox, it’s familiar and new all at once as if he were acting out a scene he had only seen in a play; he knew Enver’s taste, his smell, the way he was rough and gentle all at once. Yet, feeling it rather than seeing it through a haze of lost memories and confusion was enough to make his knees weak.

“You have a tadpole in your head. You gods damned idiot.” Enver smiled against his lips, words devoid of venom. His hands move up to cup Nox’s face, warm gold of Gortash’s gauntlets pressing against his cheeks. “I have missed you so, my dearest.”

“I missed you, too.” Nox chuckles, and his cheeks warm up as if the words were meant to stay inside his mind- as if he was supposed to be ashamed by such thoughts, but the way Enver pulls him closer makes him think perhaps it is okay not to be ashamed about some things. Perhaps, whatever lingering worry circles in his mind from before does not matter anymore.

#I am obsessed with them being so soft to each other and so terrible to everyone else #they’re evil your honor #durgetash #drabble #the dark urge #enver gortash #the dark urge x enver gortash #goretash #bg3 #fic #oc: Nox #someone posted what if lordling was durges affectionate term for gortash that Orin uses to mock his loss #and I’m obsessed #cats thoughts

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corpsebasil · 5 months

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Quick quick snippet of The Selection AU I’m working on with Nikolai.

BASIS: you’re the princess. We’ve all read the Selection I think so you know where this is going. Nikolai is a high ranked individual chosen for The Selection and he’s doing his best to win your heart, not the crown.

Let me know if you want me to continue. DRABBLE TIME.

When he approaches, your only reaction is to simply stare the man down.

Nikolai Lantsov. A Two, you think. Maybe a Three? Who cares. He’s just another pompous boy trying to seduce you into giving him a crown of jewels.

WHAT HE DOES SURPRISES YOU.

“Your Highness,” he greets you, bowing almost reverently as he stands before your gilded chair. You’re on the dais at the head of the party; someone’s birthday, you think—at least that’s the excuse the advisors gave you. Any excuse for a party is good enough for them. “would you do me the honor?”

When he offers you his hand you raise an eyebrow. No other man has been bold enough to ask you to dance tonight—not one. Truthfully you’re happy to relax on your throne while you watch the members of The Selection mingle with other guests, so why is this one brave enough to approach?

“Your name, sir?” You ask, even though you know perfectly well who he is. He knows it too; his grin says enough when he rises to his full height, the picture of confidence and grace.

If you didn’t know he wasn’t royalty you honestly would’ve thought he was.

“Nikolai.” He says, dipping his head again a fraction. “And you’d make my night if you’d dance with me.”

“What do I get in return?”

“I promise not to step on your feet too many times, my lady.”

At that, you laugh.

Honestly, that’s the first good laugh you’ve had in weeks. The stress of choosing a husband in such short of a time is overwhelming and, unbeknownst to Nikolai, you’re grateful for some banter.

“You cant dance?” You ask, a tiny smile on your face. He grins.

“If you count flailing like a fish as dancing, then absolutely Your Highness.”

You giggle. You can’t help it. And your ladies that surround you on the dais all look at you in surprise; you’ve barely entertained a single one of these men and it’s been several weeks. Who is this handsome blond with two left feet and a cocky grin?

“Alright.” You consent, rising from your seat. “But just know there’s corporal punishment for anyone that steps on my toes.”

“I would go to the whipping post with a smile on my face.”

Dear lord.

When you dance with him that night you realize he’s a liar. A hugggggge liar. He’s such a good partner that you don’t dance with a single other man that night—a sight completely obvious to every other member of The Selection.

While you two spin round after round the others watch with both jealously and mortification; why hadn’t they grown the balls to ask you to dance? By the time he’s convinced you yo dance for the fourth time in a row you’re laughing loudly, head tipped back as he twirls you at ridiculous speeds.

After a while you take a break, your pinkie hooked around his as you lead him towards the dais. A servant gives the both of you wine as you sit, him on the steps of it, you on your chair.

A future queen and her inferior, if you will, and he’s perfectly happy to stay at your feet.

“Tell me one thing about you I should worry about.” You say to him, a serene smile on your face as you watch him take a sip of wine. He’s got the best seat in the house right now on top of the dais and the other men are clearly annoyed about that. “Tell me something unforgivable.”

“I don’t know about unforgivable,” he starts, swirling the wine in his glass in a contemplative circle. “but I have faults.”

“Everyone has faults.”

“Yes, but I’m fully aware of mine.”

You watch him curiously, peering over the edge of your glass.

“What would they be?”

He ponders this for a moment and you can tell he’s actually considering your question. This isn’t rehearsed; he wants you to know the truth.

“I can be cocky.” He admits, tilting his head at you. “And loud. But I’m a fun person and I love making people happy.” He squints before adding, “I’m also selfish at times, but isn’t everyone?”

“You’re certainly bold.”

“You like bold.”

At that your grin is wide.

“Yes I do.”

WELLLL

#the selection #shadow and bone #nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x reader #wattpad #nikolai x reader #shadow and bone imagine #fluff #six of crows #knight nikolai lantsov #ethan landry

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slashingdisneypasta · 1 year

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Imagine- Disney Villain sidekicks assuring you that villain's crazy about you when they're distracted by their villainy for a long time.

"Listen to me, toots, Jafar's crazy aboutcha! And I'm not just saying that, really, I mean- I think he's stealin' your underwear. But not just that! I also think, if ya left him- we'd all be dead! Yeah! So come on, lets put a smile back on that dial, yeah? We cant have ya mopin' around... what no I don't care about you, you're the only one that gives me the good snacks!" - Iago

"Nooooo, hahaha, no no no, Hades isn't getting bored of you! Stop crying, stop crying!" "Yeah! No! He's just busy! Running the underworld is no piece of cake, you know?" "Uhuh, uhuh, uhuh- " "I'm sure, after things die down, he'll pop up right back here again and give ya a BIG kiss." "Absolutely! Now eat your dinner, Hades'll kill us if he finds out we came and didn't feed you like he told us!" "Ohhhhhhh... hey, Panic, maybe we shoulda just said THAT when they started crying." "Oh Gods." - Pain and Panic

"What- what's happening here?" "They're crying, Banzai, you moron! Whatdaya thinks happening??" "Well what am I supposed to do about it!?" "Comfort them!!" "Okay, yeah I get that, BUT HOW!?" 'Ugh, get outta my way. Hey Y/N, uh... Scar's just... pent up at the moment! He'll stop being a dick real soon!" "Well would look at that, Shenzi!- you made them worse!" "Well why don't you try, meathead!?" "Would you stop calling me names!?- " "Wait- hold on hold on- what's Ed doing?" "Wha?- " "Is he... is that a hug?" "Maybe???" "It seems like its workin', lets just back away... " - Shenzi, Banzai and Ed

"Oh, Y/N, the Prince is just... temperamental. You cant take it to heart! Lord knows I don't, and I have proper reason to!- No, no, no, not that you don't have good reason to be upset, that's not what I meant!! Oh dear, oh dear... Look, PJ does love you! He's just got a lot on his mind right now, what with Robin Hood making him look a fool, and all... Right? Right. Come along now, we'll have some sweets from the kitchen, would that cheer you up?" - Sir Hiss

"Come on, Y/N... Gaston's not trying to make you feel bad, he just doesn't notice! What? That's not better?? Okay- Uh... You know what always cheers me up when he's been a big old meanie?? I remember how great he is. Lets do it! Together! Okay- NOOO OOOONEEES- oh, they're not singing with me... uh... Uh uh uh- Heyy, why dont you stare into the fire a while?, it helps when Gaston's in a funk or OH!- What about a foot massage? Gaston says I'm good at that!- " - LeFou

"Oh dear dear dear- The Captain isn't going to leave you, Y/N! He's just excited, is all! Thinks he's got a real shot at Pan this time, he does! Like a kid at Christmas! I'm sure, once he's done with the poor boy he'll run right back here and apologise- he really doesn't mean to be rude, you know!! He just forgets his head sometimes! Now sit down, sit down, I'll make you some tea and you'll feel good as new no time." - Mr Smee

They aren't great at it but they're trying XDD

(You've gotta try and imagine them in their voices XD Especially Iago and Smee)

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