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#can't wait to look at many talented people's work that i've missed
stellar-chrondrite · 7 months
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Guess who's coming back to the Yu-Gi-Oh fandom?
:D
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greeneyed-thestral · 2 months
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I MET MICHAEL SHEEN. 16/03/24, National Theatre
So, if you've read my post about booking tickets to see Michael, you know all about my what-ifs. But the day was finally here.
I arrived at the National Theatre, followed all the Nye signs and here's the Olivier Theatre. I made my sister buy me the show's programme, hoping I would be able to get it signed.
I find my seat, I'm not in the centre but the stage still feels very close and you can see everything (amphitheatres are always the best).
Lights out. The audience is in religious silence. Can't believe I'm actually here, this is happening.
[skip this part in smaller font, if you want to avoid spoilers] In the words of Staged, he really loses himself in his roles. First of all, it's great to hear him speak in a Welsh accent.
But then we also see him turning back into a child, and you can totally believe he's young and innocent again. His stutter feels so real, his struggle and sadness too. The entire ensamble is great during the classroom scene, where they all help Nye against their bullying teacher (using those big canes to make him look scary really works). Hearing young Nye confessing that at times he thinks he 'shouldn't exist' because of who he is was a gut punch; Michael's delivery of that whole part is incredible, in that moment he really becomes a little boy that allows himself to feel vulnerable and says something dark to a friend. The way he jumps while saying "I can visualise and enunciate!" made me wanna jump too, he was ready to give up and then he found the solution through books, it's the joy and relief you feel when you realise that there is another way and your life is not over.
Now, I've watched musicals all my life and let me tell you that man is meant to be in one. He opened his mouth and all I could see was someone that had been waiting a long time for the occasion to show his talent, truly showstopping. He was so free and happy and confident, singing and dancing spectacularly. I couldn't stop smiling and giggling, we all clapped.
It's clear he means every word he says, and when he points and shouts his political arguments at the audience, those who feel called out must be shaking; I thought 'This is how people in Ancient Greece must have felt everytime they went to the theatre'. His Nye is inspiring, passionate, someone you'd want to follow, he stands up for what he believes in and lets nothing get in his way.
We get to watch him flirt, on all fours, waggling his 'tail'; everytime we think we've seen all he's capable of, he does something like this and surprises us.
But most of all, we see him being scared, first of having to do something, and then of not being able to do enough for all of us. At one point everyone has requests for Nye and I was expecting him to shout "Heal yourselves!" like Jesus in JCS, it totally conveyed what it must have been like to be in his role at the time, overwhelmed with daunting responsibilities.
In general, I appreciated the fact that it wasn't a linear biography, they chose life moments that have universal situations everyone can relate too, like they do in bio-musicals. I loved the staging. The colour palette is so recognisable; the curtains and the beds are used in many different ways so everything is explored at its full potential.
He is on stage basically all the time for more than two hours (sometimes twice a day, can you imagine?). Also barefoot and in his pajamas from start to finish, he looks like a teddy bear you just want to hug and protect.
He bows, looks at Nye's achievements, then leaves the stage.
Standing ovation, applause. I go back to the theatre lobby, I was supposed to wait for my sister, but she's late. Meanwhile, a fan asks me how to get to the Stage Door. I start too fear that I'm going to miss my chance if I keep waiting inside, so I decide to go on my own. After no more than 5 minutes, he's outside with us. Forget Nye, I am living my fever dream. He has just finished his second show of the day and yet he's smiling and listening to each and every one, signing and taking pictures. I know many have said this, but he really is an angel.
My sister arrives, and as soon as I'm sure she has the camera ready, I make my way to him. The two girls next to me who were speaking to him needed a pen and I lent them my sharpie, so I got my chance to look generous in front of him.
And suddently it was my turn. This is as much as my scrambled mind allows me to remember: I tell him I'm Francesca and I'm from Italy, he asks me how long I am going to stay, I confess that I had arrived that morning and just to see him, that I would be leaving already the following morning. I can't even focus while he's signing my programme, I just want to find the right words. I manage to say how I enjoyed seeing his passion, all these different sides of him and how watching him sing and dance has been the highlight of my evening. We take a picture together, I feel his hand on my shoulder and I realise my arm is around the waist of this person I love. I had to thank him again, telling him that he only deserves good things and that we are so lucky to have him. He wishes me a safe trip home, and I melt. I leave and I can't stop trembling. On my way back to the hotel I hold on tight to my signed programme and the sharpie that was in his hands just moments earlier. Only later I will realise that he's also written 'Ciao!', 'love' and 'X', without me asking for it or anything! Seeing him act live was a big gift already, but what followed outside was beyond my dreams. I can't look at the photos without blushing, the way he looks at me in the video and then also strokes my arm for a moment, I mean pinch me now.
The more I think about it, the more I can't believe it happened.
I want to thank everyone that under my first post pushed me and encouraged me to see the pros of doing this, I share this beautiful moment of my life with all of you. <3
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orecana · 9 months
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Not so innocent
Jung jaehyun x male reader
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Hello everyone. Orecana here! I've written and post another fic for you guys to enjoy. Thank you to whoever read and support my fic so far. Love you guys.
Warning: this fic contains the following that may disturb you
Alpha beta Omega second genders
harsh sexualization
Sexual assault
Murder
Description of blood and gore
Pet names
Belly bulge and cum inflation
Most importantly, my first time writing a smut which will go extremely bad......
If any of the things listed above annoys the hell out of you, you are more than welcome to get the hell out of this fic and do something else.
Y/n is a young omega that has just recently transferred to neo academy, a prestigious school for talented individuals like himself.
Neo academy, is a prestigious school that will send an application letter to the most gifted individuals in the entire world.
He jumps happily as he looks at the academy in front of him, he can't believe it! It's like a dream come true.
He goes into the academy and is extremely happy and surprised on how luxurious everything is.
He goes into a room which he presumes to be the office, so that he could get his schedule and dorm key. However, that will have to wait a bit because the person behind the desk is currently talking to someone.
He waits until they're done and when the person turns around, y/n feels his heart beat faster.
The man is ridiculously handsome with brown hair and that sharp jawline. The alpha seeing y/n admiring him, sends him a wink before going out of the office.
Are you y/n l/n?
Y/n snaps out of his daze and looks at the direction of the woman.
Yes i am
The woman hands over his schedule and dorm key to him. The woman frowns when she sees his key.
Uh there's seems to be a problem with your key, I need to take a quick call.
The woman phones someone. When the called picked up, they engaged in a serious conversation. Y/n doesn't know what they were talking about because the woman used her magic to conceal her conversation, but he knows that it was not going well, seeing that the woman keeps rubbing her forehead with a permanent scowl on her face. She reluctantly stops the call before facing y/n.
It seems that the omega and beta dorms have all been booked, so the only available rooms are in the alpha dorms. I truly apologize for this.
Y/n smiles before holding the woman's hand which has his key.
Don't worry miss, I'll be fine. Besides you read my application form you should know what I can do that other omegas can't.
The woman seems to contemplate before remembering. She smiled at y/n before sighing.
Right... I totally forgot about that. Still try to stay safe, the majority of alphas there Don't really respect omegas.
Y/n only giggles as his once (eye color) eyes turn into purple ones.
Oh. They will turn into new people by the time I'm done with them.
He thanks the woman before leaving, the woman only smiles as she thinks.
"this boy.... Is really incredible."
Y/n looks at his schedule that also works as a map around the school. Biology first then lunch break then we can do extra courses and last but not least battlefield fighting.
He smiles at the last one, eyes turning blood red once again at the mention of fighting. As an omega, he was badly sexualized in the past by so many unruly alphas but today he can change that.
He stops in front of the biology classroom and knocks. *Knock knock*
Come in!
He enters into a full classroom with many students. They all turn towards him as he closes the door. The professor adjusts his glasses before looking at y/n.
Ah! Are you y/n l/n? Please have a seat in one of the empty chairs. You're not late at all, we're just starting.
He smiles at the professor's kindness before bowing and sitting in one of the empty chairs on the left.
Shortly after a few minutes though, he slowly begins to regret sitting there. The alpha near him keeps releasing his toxic pheromones onto him and it's making him lightheaded. Fortunately, a student sitting across from them seems to notice and alert the professor, which immediately groans and clog his nose, an action that most students there do as well.
Mr. Samuel... We would appreciate it that you don't stink the whole room with your pheromones.
That alpha only smile cockily as he slides his hands down y/n's waist. Y/n was shocked at the action. How dare he!
And what do you want me to do professor? I got a real delectable omega sitting next to me right now. How can I keep my hands to myself? Besides those hips and that asshole just looks like he's begging to be fucked.
Many students were shocked that he say stuff like that with no remorse, he discreetly tries to slide his hands into y/n's shirt so he could play with the nipples. Y/n was about to act when a fist made its way into the alpha's face.
The entire class was shocked and Samuel holds his face in pain as blood started to come out, dripping down his broken nose and lips. Y/n looks up at his savior to see the handsome man from before, his left fist was covered in blood.
He goes and holds the other man's knuckle and raises his palm. Everyone was wide eyed when y/n's absorbed the blood from the knuckle into his hand as he moans.
Ahhhhh.... (The relaxed moan) I haven't felt blood in my veins since ages ago.
He says this as he looks at Samuel who cowardly tries to run while injured.
Oh? Where are you going? Didn't you wanted to grope me and feel me? Why are you running away?
Y/n says these lines with the most sinister face everybody could of imagined, even the man from before was awestruck at such a personality.
Samuel ran out of the class.
Typical alphas. Always acting so tough on the outside, but a bloody coward on the inside.
He turns around and look at the professor.
Shall we resume class professor?
He says this with such the sweetest smile ever that everyone wondered on what the hell happened to the person they saw just now?
Eventually, the professor did resume class and all students listened. Even y/n, who was new to the school managed to answer some of the difficult questions, which made a lot of people in the class respect him.
It was lunch break and students were hurrying out of the classroom. Y/n was putting his books back into his bag when he felt a tap on his shoulder. He looks behind him to see that man.
Hey, wanna eat lunch with me?
Y/n could not believe his ears as he just stared at the alpha in front of him.
"this handsome god wants to hang out with me?!"
Y/n feels a blush coming on to his face as he mutters a weak "yes", which made the alpha smirks in satisfaction. The alpha leans into his ear as he whispers sultry.
My name's Jung jaehyun, baby~.
And boy did it make y/n squirms in his seat. His face flushed so hard it could be compared to a ripe tomato. Jaehyun smirks even more as he pats the Omega's shoulder.
I'll see you later at the cafeteria baby.
Once y/n hears the door shut behind him, he summons a concealment aura around him before screaming his lungs out.
"did he just got asked out by a hot guy? It feels like a dream come true."
He was smiling so happily as he imagines the alpha dreamy looks. He eventually snaps out of it and heads for the cafeteria.
When he reaches the cafeteria, he is even more awestruck. The whole cafeteria is divided to suit each person's personal taste on places they want to eat and the food there is absolutely divine. There are so many options to choose from though, y/n is at a lost on what he should eat.
Eventually, he decides to eat webfoot octopus with a side of iced milk tea. He has always enjoyed milk tea, to him it's like a special drink that will always make him relax.
Soon a boy is walking towards his table with a tray of his food.
Enjoy your food
He nods and quickly dig in.
Hey baby~
Y/n freezes, there's only one person with that voice.
Y/n: jaehyun? Is it you?
Jaehyun chuckles and sits down in the same table as y/n. They started talking about each other, from likes and dislikes to preferences.
One point during their talk, he could feel someone staring him down. He looks around him carefully, to see a lot of omegas staring him down. There were also alphas staring jaehyun down for being next to him.
He smirks as he looks at jaehyun, signalling him to come closer with his finger. Jaehyun lean in while chuckling.
I'm gonna make these omega and alpha drop their jaws, do you wanna help me?
And what are you gonna do baby?
Y/n pulls jaehyun closer to him before locking their lips together. Jaehyun, not even surprised immediately follow up by pushing his tongue into the other's mouth.
All the omegas and alphas watch them make out as some scream in anger while most are turned on.
They pulled away with saliva connecting their lips. They smirks at each other as y/n eyes turns purple yet again. Jaehyun notices this but doesn't act on it because he doesn't want the omega to be uncomfortable. He does think about others.
I'll see you later baby
The bell rings signaling the end of lunch break as most students grumble on their way to extra lessons. Y/n however don't have an extra class to participate in though. He did see a few request into certain classes but he's just not interested.
He decided to call it a day today by checking into his dorm room early. He goes into the alpha dormitory and scans his key card on the elevator. *Ding*
The elevator opens. He walks towards the dorm rooms counting them down while looking for his number.
500? Ah this must be it!
He uses his key to open the door. It went in!
He opens the door to a welcoming vibe as he drags his bag into the room and sit on the sofa in the living room. He decided to unpack early so he could get it done much faster and don't have to deal with it later.
Y/n takes a quick shower to relieve his stress and apply his favourite powder. This magical beauty product was always capable of making anybody the fairest by just a few pats on the face.
He looks at himself in the mirror, admiring his appearance.
I look so cute
He puts his make up product back in its place before he goes back into school for the last lesson.
Fighting.
When he arrived at the battlefield location, most of the students there has already fought. People noticed that he was here, some catcalled him because of black kimono he's wearing. It had a unique design of many Sakura flowers and burning spirits. The teacher approach him.
Hello y/n. Would you like to fight someone too?
He look around to find an alpha who is mocking everyone he fought.
Hah! You are so weak! Why did you even come to this academy, you bugs? Haha.
Y/n smirks as he found his target for the day.
I wanna fight him teacher!
Oh really? He is a bit strong tho, please be careful.
Y/n chuckles as he steps onto the stage. Once he was on the stage, he levitates off the ground and sits in the air in a meditating position.
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(sth like this)
The alpha who he chose, smirks as he steps onto the stage as well.
Well well well, looks like another person have decided to challenge me. I have thought it would be a beta or an alpha, but it's a just an omega slut.
Most of the people in the battlefield feel disgusted as the alpha keeps talking about how useless omega is to society, only viable as a breeding tool for the whole society to use.
Y/n did not react at all, he just levitates there in the same position. The alpha slowly starts to get angry.
Oy, bitch! The hell are you ignoring me for?
Y/n didn't reply
You f***ing useless slut! Answer me!
Y/n didn't reply. The alpha got so angry that he goes in to hit y/n hard with his fist, until it collided with something in front of y/n's body that made a sickening crack to his hand.
Ahhhhhhh! My hand!
Y/n opens his eyes, his eyes were purple and he slowly drops onto the floor, walking slowly towards the alpha who tries to crawl back in fear.
How dare you insult the nature of my kind? Just because your kind is of higher stature, doesn't mean you can make fun of my people. The omegas...
People watch in fascination as y/n drags out a sword from the middle of his chest through his kimono as a glowing purple aura surrounds he stage.
SHALL SHINE ETERNAL!
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He slashes with that sword as the alpha stops screaming. He sheaths the sword as the alpha lets out a large painful wail before collapsing.
He goes off the stage before going back to his dorm room not bothering to talk or look at anyone right now.
He unlocks his door and try to go in before someone grabs his arm. He pulls his arm away from the person before turning around with the deadliest glare ever. Jaehyun was scared shitless because of y/n. Once the omega see him tho, he softens a bit before pulling him in his room.
I'm sorry. I'm just mad.
Jaehyun only hugs y/n as he hugs him back.
Through a couple of days in the academy, y/n was a popular student among campus. He was the "his excellency the almighty Narukami ogosho god of thunder."
He has deepened his relationship with jaehyun and even met some of his fellow friends. He found himself getting along with taeyong the most, who was like a parent to him.
Things were going smoothly for y/n until that day
Y/n wakes up to the harsh feeling of nausea and headache. His dick was brushing against his shorts as he sighs at the uncomfortable feeling. He already knows what this means. His heat has just arrived. He groans as he just takes off his shorts and plays with his hole, moaning at the feeling of emptyness.
His mind keeps wandering to jaehyun and his well built body, packed with muscles and a six packs. He subconsciously licks his lips and his fingers goes in and out of his hole more aggressively. He moans out loud as he climaxes.
He breathes in and out, tired but his erection is still hard. He groans.
This is going to be a long day.
Jaehyun wanted to go see y/n, hearing that he was absent today in class because he was sick. In his hand was a box of hot soup. He knocks on the door of y/n dorm room
Y/n I'm coming in!
He lets himself inside the house as he immediately freezes and the box of soup fell onto the floor. Y/n was there, stretching himself with his fingers yet again as he moans lewdly.
Jaehyun wants nothing more than to fuck y/n at this moment, but he controlled himself. Y/n however pulls the alpha towards him as he looks at him with a lustful gaze. He flicks his fingers and they were teleported into y/n's bedroom.
Alpha! You're finally here.... I've been waiting for so long for you to show up. My fingers aren't enough to satisfy my heat at all. I only crave for more and more.
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His fingers slithered around jaehyun's uniform as he swiftly dispose of them with his magic, quickly leaving jaehyun in his boxer. The omega mouth waters at the large bulge the alpha is carrying. He pulls it off and was slapped in the face with his cock.
IT'S SO LONG VEINY AND THICK.
Y/n knew that jaehyun was packing, but not to this extent. His purple glitters as he wasted no time and suck off the cock in front of him.
Jaehyun grunts as he feel the hot mouth of the omega sucking him off. It feels so good. He looks down at y/n who was busy savoring his cock like a starved man, filthy slurping sounds were heard all over the room. He sees how the omega took his long and thick veiny cock like a champ.
Y/n felt jaehyun dick throbs inside his mouth and begins working on it faster, determined to make him cum. Jaehyun groans in arousal.
Fuck! Baby, that feels so good. I-i'm gonna-
Jaehyun didn't even get to finish as he finally cums inside y/n's mouth. Floods of potent alpha cum is continuously being released into y/n's awaiting mouth, who slurps and drinks it all up.
Hah..... Hah...... Hah.....
Y/n takes jaehyun's cock out of his mouth while leaning his tongue out to collect any leftover cum. Jaehyun moans as his cock returns into its former condition only even bigger than before.
He quickly uses 3 of his fingers to play with the Omega's hole. Y/n moans out loud at the sudden intrusion of such thick fingers.
I'm gonna get your hole ready for my cock baby. Gonna breed you full of my pups *groans*.
Jaehyun whispers these words so hotly in y/n's ear that he immediately cums. His white semen covering his and jaehyun's body. Soon jaehyun removes his fingers and y/n knows what coming up next.
Jaehyun lines up his cock with y/n's hole, before pushes his cock in with one big thrust. Y/n moans loudly at the intrusion while jaehyun moans as well.
F-fuck baby, you're so tight. You're gripping so hard onto my cock.
J-jaehyun, f-fuck m-e. fill my hole with your pups. Breed me with your know, please alpha. I beg you~.
Jaehyun lost his sense of control and immediately rams into y/n's hole mercilessly as y/n just moans lewdly with his tongue out. They were both loss in the pleasure.
Jaehyun switches their position as he holds y/n against his chest and holds y/n's head. He kisses y/n as he continuously rams into the tight hole.
A-alpha~ look how good your cock is fucking me.
Jaehyun moans when he sees y/n's stomach and it only urges him to fuck him even harder and deeper. Everytime he rams into y/n's hole, it creates a noticable bulge inside the Omega's stomach fueling the two desires to mate.
Your ass feels so good around my cock. I'm gonna cum!
M-me too.
They both kissed as they chase their climax.
They both moaned into each other's mouth as they climax, jaehyun knots into y/n's hole as he pumps gallons of cum into y/n's tight clenching hole. The omega also came.
They both pants, out of breath as they recover from their sex. They miss each other sweetly before pulling away. They look at each other in the eye and smile.
I love you y/n l/n. I have fell for you for a while.
I love you too Jung jaehyun.
They look down at y/n's stomach that has a considerable bulge because of the amount of cum that jaehyun is dumping in him.
Heh how much cum do you have?
It's all for you my love.
Y/n blushes. Even in times like these, jaehyun never fails to make him blush.
After a while, jaehyun's knot shrink down and he pulls out of y/n's hole as the omega whimpers from the lost of being filled. Cum did not fall out of the omega though because y/n uses his magic to keep it all in him.
You really want my baby huh?
Of course, you're my alpha after all.
They lay down on the bed that is now cleaned thanks to y/n's magic. Jaehyun embrace his lover as he leans in close.
I love you my not so innocent omega.
*chuckles* I love you too my hot alpha.
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ahqkas · 2 years
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𝐨𝐨𝐨. I'VE GOT MY EYES ON YOU ; anakin skywalker
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pairing! anakin skywalker x gn!reader
synopsis! three times you caught anakin looking at you with a look that was preserved just for you; full of fondness and affection. two times anakin's thoughts were nothing but on you with what you could describe was warmth and adoration. one time you gave it all to him, but at what cost?
warnings! not proofread, fluff, mention of nightmares (for both anakin & you), wounds, anakin patching reader up after the events of aotc, minor swearing, lmk if i missed smth !!
word count! 3.1k
note! i got inspired by alan wake (remasted, i havent played/watched the og version) with the clicker so if you have hard time imagining it search it up :) ,, anyway liking, reblogging & commenting is very appreciated !! <3
link for chapter 2!
© ahqkas — all rights reserved. even when credited, these works are prohibited to be reposted, translated or modified
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If anyone ever asked you for some random reason if you had someone to look at you or think about you the way you were left blushing on a spot with wide eyes and thinking about it for the rest of the day, you would say yes without any hesitation. There was a boy, now a man, who had this kind of a look preserved just for you. He would use it any time he wanted to get a reaction out of you or just felt like being rebellious in public. And it worked.
Anakin Skywalker looked at you like you put the stars in the night sky and thought of you like you brought the sun high to shine as the restless cycle repeated itself again and again. He was looking at you that way without any shame and it definitely wouldn't be a surprise to see the council catching up with the rule breaker. Every chance he had, every opportunity he got to be around you, the glint never left his eyes.
And you were terrified to figure out you didn't mind to be admired in that way by your fellow Jedi.
I. ━ Anakin
With the way Anakin held himself, you could recognise his loud footsteps even without using the Force which should be considered a talent as he's usually a quiet and fast walker (that's during missions, but still). So when you felt the familiar presence sit beside you, you didn't freak out this time and stayed still, looking at the night sky of Coruscant with nothing but peace in your mind and clutching the ignited lightsaber in your hands.
"Can't sleep?"
The missions you were assigned to work on with your master were partly a child's play from how much you've learned since the time you entered the Jedi Temple and became a proud Padawan. You didn't underestimate your assignments, no, but you finished them with a praise from your master and some time you saved by being so quick with the mission. However, sleeping came hardly on you. Sometimes you would find yourself in a situation when you just spent the night sleeplessly laying on your bed and staring at the high ceiling, waiting for the sun to wake up and light up the dark sky.
You turned to face Anakin's direction where he slumped beside you, his hands placed in in his lap as he sat cross-legged and played with his fingers. "No, what about you."
"I can't as well."
Your gaze fell back to the sky, observing the stars you always felt fascinated by. There was just something about them, how they just shined and made many of people happy while they still were free. You were supposed to do the same, shine and please the council but you weren't as free as the stars. They didn't have the need to satisfy, they did it because it's how it works. Younger you often wanted to be just like them if not one of them.
"You look like something's on your mind. What's troubling you, [Name]?" as he said that, you noticed his eyes never left your face.
You brought your lightsaber closer to your face as you let the gentle humming relax your mind and the warmth embrace your features like a warm blanket on a cold day. "I've been having these nightmares recently and I can't keep them out of my head. They appear almost every night and it's just so exhausting, y'know."
Anakin nodded in the corner of your vision and you felt slightly stupid. Couldn't you just come up with a simple lie? He surely didn't need to know that and now he's gonna pity you and try to convince you to go and see the council about it. Which you didn't want to do. It would show a weakness.
"I understand more than you think. I had those kind of dreams, too, and they weren't fun either. I want you to know that you can talk to me about it. We're friends."
Your body shifted to face his, the lightsaber serving as a source of light that was reflecting [colour] on both of your features. His face looked good in that colour but his ego didn't have to know that. Friends, right. You knew his feelings for you meant something more than a friend should feel for their friend yet you didn't protest when his hand would linger around yours a bit longer than usual. "I know, thank you. My nightmares, they are different yet they all have the same kind of an ending or meaning. Someone always dies in them while I'm just standing there and feeling helpless because I can't help in any way to change their fate. It's honestly cruel."
Anakin's eyes softened as they observed every inch of your face while you talked. "I had the same dreams about my mom. It'll get better, I promise. Meditate before going to bed, just keep your mind of that dreams and they'll eventually leave you alone."
You didn't miss the sad glint in his eyes but you turned the lightsaber off and gave him a small smile, feeling grateful for his words. Why would you even think about him and the council in the same sentence, it didn't make any sense. "Thanks, Ani."
He returned the same smile and his eyes seemed to lit up slightly at the use of his nickname. It held a special place in his heart since it was given to him by his mother but the way the name rolled out of your mouth kept him wide awake in his bed and forcing his restless mind to think about you.
And there was the same look again. Because Anakin would see you at your most vulnerable moment of your life but he still could think of how heavenly your Force felt in his presence and how only one glance at you is needed to make his heart beat faster.
II. ━ Anakin
Nightmares were rather unpleasant dreams that often caused some emotional damage to your being and you despised how they made you feel; helpless, full of anxiety, frightened, gloomy and many other things you couldn't think of. Waking up from them wasn't any better than dreaming them. You'd wake up sweating and not knowing what's happening, if that all was just your imagination playing tricks on you. So when you woke up to Anakin having one of those, you knew exactly how he must have felt.
When your tired eyes opened to gaze at the boy who was currently sitting on a bed next to yours, you knew from his body language that something was wrong. His chest heaved with every shaky breath he took and the sweat glistening under tonight's moonlight was noticeable even for your squinting eyes. It seemed his stare was observing every inch of your shared room and when he was done, his eyes flickered to your own.
You wanted to close them and fake your sleep to save yourself from the awkward moment but you remained still, watching him with a hint of curiousity. You were right about how awkward the situation could be but you weren't expecting him to just plainly stare at you. What was he expecting from you, you had no idea.
After a little of your staring contest where none of you blinked, Anakin stood up from his bed, put on a sleeping robe and went outside to stand on the balcony that was attached to the room you both were staying in. On a wish from Master Yoda, both Masters Kenobi and Floren with their padawan learners (Anakin and you) went on a mission to learn more experience for your studying. Obi-Wan and your master decided to take the first watch so that left you and Anakin to share the bedroom.
You blinked at the now empty sheets and frowned to yourself. Was he expecting you to just let him be and forget about it? That would make the situation more embarrassing so you stood up as well and joined him on the balcony.
Anakin's face wasn't showing any feelings and you found yourself being impressed by it as he was usually the person who wore their emotion on their face. You could easily read him but that wasn't the situation now. You chose to approach him gently.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
As the words left your mouth, the boy standing next to you shook his head and lowered it down so he wasn't facing you which meant you couldn't read him for good. "It isn't necessary, don't worry."
Your hand went to pat his elbow and you sent him a small smile, returning him the kindness he showed you in exactly the same situation. It wasn't because 'there was a need to return it' but because you wanted to. "Well I'm here if you wanna talk about it. I'm not going anywhere."
Anakin managed to face your way, his face was close to yours yet it felt like thousand miles away. You felt your face drop a bit as you saw his eyes but you successfully hid it from the fellow Padawan. There was the familiar sad glint in his eyes you used to have after recovering from your nightmares in which the people you were close to died or suffered enough to make you wish you could switch your places. He took the hand from his elbow and held it in his own instead, feeling the warmth spreading across his chest as his heart beat faster than before. "It was about my mother, again. I saw her as early as I see you now. She's in pain, [Name]. She's suffering. And it's bothering me because I can't do anything about it." For now.
You sqeezed your intertwined fingers and tried to be as positive in the situation as you could be. "They're called nightmares for a reason, Ani, I'm sure they'll pass. And if not you can always talk about it with Master Kenobi-,"
"Jedi don't have nightmares, [Name]."
"But humans do. You're not just a Jedi, Anakin. You're so much more if you haven't noticed. You are allowed to have your own feelings and we both clearly know you never listen to the Order. Don't let them control you, okay?"
Anakin let his face relax at your short speech and finally gave you a real smile from which you could tell the unsaid words; gratitude for this moment being one of them.
"Oh and I have something for you. Open your hand and face it with your palm up."
With furrowed brows and a face expression that held "What are you planning?", he listened to your instructions and held out his left hand whilst he still had the other one in the gentle but tight grip of yours.
Reaching into the pocket of your robes you didn't take off before going to bed, you placed a tiny rusty machine like thing into his open palm. It resembled the colour gold but with how the thing aged, the edges were dipped in deep brown. There was a switch in the middle and Anakin had the urge to press it and see what would happen. But his curiosity got the best of him. "What is this?"
You chuckled as he examined your gift, feeling happy on the inside to see him distracted from his sad thoughts. "It's a light switch programmed to light up any room you switch it on in. It was given to me by Master Floren after I couldn't keep up with my nightmares when I was a kid. Surprise, but it worked and I was no longer afraid to fall back asleep," with how you were forming your sentences to Anakin, you grew to be a bit emotional at the moment, rethinking the times when your master would sit by your side and tell you stories about the Jedi and their adventures you would experience one day. "It's also called the Clicker and I want you to have it."
Some would call it an attachment and you definitely grew attached to that thing but it was a stupid rule so you decided to break it. Just this time, you told yourself.
Anakin's eyes were sparkling so lightly in front of you, you thought they might have outshined the very stars you had above your heads. There was so much of a child's happiness you were glad to give. "Are you sure? I mean, with how you talk about this thing, the Clicker, it must mean a lot to you."
"I'm serious, Ani. It's yours."
The boy before you made sure to really look into your eyes. His gaze held so many words to say yet he couldn't get them out and it made him frustrated. It amazed him how he could confess to you in his mind without any problem but when he was in front of you, his mind just didn't think straight. But as you exchanged the reflects of kindness and appreciation, neither of you paid attention to the growing feelings towards you both.
III. ━ Anakin
It fucking stung.
And to think scratches caused only the minimum pain you could ever go through. Well, you were wrong and now you had to bite into your tongue so you wouldn't scoff at someone who didn't do anything and just wait until you get a medical help. It all happened so fast. One day you were spending a pleasant time with both Anakin and the Senator of Naboo, Padmé Amidala (your newest friend as it turned out she wasn't as bossy as she seemed. No, Padmé was actually the fully opposite of that; she was nothing but sweet at heart and her presence held so much of comfort) and the next you three went on a mission to save Anakin's master Obi-Wan which didn't exactly go according to the plan. That's how you found yourself in a position where you were literally fighting for your life. Never again. And that's how you ended up with scratched back and ripped clothes with blood and dirt on them.
You felt dirty at that moment.
There was dust and sand covering almost your entire face and a blanket was resting on your shoulders while you patiently waited for some kind of a droid to finally patch you up.
When the door opened and your head turned to face the direction you expected a medic droid to beep at you in a knowledge but instead you saw the familiar face of a boy you've grown to love and his presence instantly welcomed you with a warm feeling.
"Hi."
Anakin's face broke up into a grin as he quickly walked up to your bed and sat beside you. Maker, was he glad to see you well and alive. You started to scare him by how quickly your back became more and more painted with the rich red but you calmed him down by saying it's nothing serious (spoiler alert; he didn't believe you in the slightest). But for you he was the priority, he just lost his arm and there he was, worrying about you. "How's your back doing? It's not bad right?"
His hand hovered above your back just close enough to feel the warmth of them but far away to not accidentally put you into any more pain and you appreciated the gesture. "It looks worse than it feels but it's all right. One of the medic droids said it's probably going to scar so I can say I have a little souvenir."
Anakin's eyes traveled from your covered back to your eyes and you could see his lips twitch a little into a smile. "It's gonna look badass on you, [Nickname]."
"Thanks."
"Yeah, it's nothing."
After the most awkward silence you've ever witnessed between you two, you found your gaze following his arm that was supposed to, well, there wasn't supposed to be anything. But it was dressed in a black glove so you came to a thought about him getting a replacement. Now that looked badass. "What about you though. How's your arm?"
Anakin glanced down at his arm as if he already forgot about it being there and let out an airy chuckle. "It's fine, it feels like my own but I think I need some time to get used to it, you know."
"I don't get the feeling but I understand you," you laughed at the interaction, feeling like you were traveling back in time to where both of you were just the little younglings who used to have fun and do stupid things around the Temple. You missed those times but with Anakin you often felt like living in them again. However, your joy was interrupted by the feeling of your bandage being soaked with more of your blood and you couldn't stand it.
"Could you help me change my bandages for me? I can't fully reach behind me to do it how I should," you asked him nervously but soon relaxed as you saw him nod his head a bit too quickly which made you smile to yourself.
"Of course. Can I take it off?"
Gesturing to the now bloody blanket the medic droid gave to you to cover up so you could feel as comfortable as the circumstances allowed to, you shrugged it off, causing the fabric to pool around your hips. "Well we don't really have a choice, do we, Skywalker?"
The boy sitting next to you carefully grabbed the dirty bandages and peeled them off, trying to not tug on your skin too hard. You could feel his eyes on you after he was done with the removing causing you to start feeling self-conscious. Was it really that bad? The droid said something different so either it lied or Anakin didn't like it. But why would you even care if he likes your new scar?
"What? What does it look like?"
Anakin didn't say a word to you, he just continued in doing his job (he was good, you had to give it to him) and when he was finished with wrapping now the clean bandages around your waist (which included his hands, both flesh and glove, brushing against your bare skin), he moved to stand in front of you, his eyes never leaving yours as he answered your question and you were sure if you weren't sitting, your knees would shake with how he was looking down at you. His gaze held certain curiosity like he was trying to find another parts of you he could fall in love with over and over again.
"Like I said, it's badass."
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TAGLIST ━ @arelisskywalker
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crescencestudio · 11 months
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Devlog #32 | 06.27.23
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Hi everyone!
I'm here! With an Update! This is an exciting one because I am Finally releasing a Full! Game! <3 I will obviously still be talking about Alaris, but I am vibrating with excitement because I can't wait to release intertwine to you all! THE RELEASE DATE APPROACHES
Writing
Because we entered crunch mode for intertwine, this month was mostly focused on continuing to fill out Druk's route and my dissertation.
I didn't make as much progress on Druk's route as I would've liked (I was hoping to FINISH it, but Otojam crunch wrecked my ass). But I do have most of the route finished! At this point, I only have the final chapter to go, so we are Very Close! Druk's route is shaping up to be a really fun one. I like to sprinkle humor into all the routes, but because of Druk's character, there are a lot of funny (at least to me) cast interactions. I hope people enjoy it as much as I do because I have a big fat crush on him now!
Regarding editing, we are just about rounding out the last of Fenir's developmental edits (courtesy of local superhero dev Wudgeous of Herotome) and Kayn's line edits (courtesy of local royalty IF writer Vi of Next in Line). With Fenir's script coming up on the last of the developmental edits, that is basically two routes that are going to be ready for beta-testing after the updated demo, which is very exciting! I am extremely happy with how Fenir's route has turned out after some developmental revisions, and I hope you all like the sweet little (grumpy) baby's route!
Art
Again, most (all) of my attention was on intertwine art assets this month. I was focused on the rest of the GUI, sprite expression, and CGs so that the game will be ready for release at the end of this month!
I'm really happy with how intertwine has come out visually considering the two month time crunch! Many of the playtesters mentioned how they liked the GUI and overall aesthetic of the game, which---for my pea-sized brain that has no object permanence when it comes to compliments---meant the world to me!
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Review of intertwine Screenshots (left to right, starting at the top row): Main Menu Screen, Options/Preferences Screen, In-Game Dialogue Preview, Exhibit Preview
For Alaris, I did still get some new backgrounds from Vui, and while they are beautiful, I can no longer share them since they venture into spoiler territory. Sorry folks!
I have a sneak peek of a little Something Something.
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Adorable emotes for a certain Something Something! That's all I will leave you with for now <3
Additional Notes
I spent A LOT of this month coding. I re-entered programming hell to get intertwine up and running. There were a lot of features that I coded for the first time, like a texting interface, some animations, and one Special, Very Game-Centric Feature That I Can't Disclose Due to Extreme Spoilers. It was really rewarding to see it all come together, and I am pretty happy with the end result ^^
You don't even know the hell I went through to customize this texting feature
We also have a lovely voice actor for Van, which we revealed on Twitter. Max has been an amazing talent to work with, and I am in love with the way he brought Van to life!!
Finally, I spontaneously ended up working with Orpheo Fenn and Kija of Faefield Productions for a custom intertwine soundtrack. I've been wanting to work with them for a while, so I'm so happy we were able to collab!
No market research this month, except for the fact that I played Tears of the Kingdom a little bit in my free time ^^ I am so in love with Link. Also, I didn't see the appeal to Sidon in the first game, but for some reason in this game, It Clicked. Like I Get It.
That's all from me for this month. Look forward to an intertwine release in the coming days! I'm excited to get back into Alaris full-swing this upcoming month. I didn't think I'd feel this way after feeling oversaturated with them for a hot minute, but I miss my Alaris gang <3 See you all next month, and stay safe!
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if-mirrormine · 11 months
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morning news
summary: kennedy's reaction to finding out that mc has reappeared.
word count: 552
based on the ask (and request of many): please write the drabbles with kennedy and alex’s reactions to the news of mc returning there is interest!!!!! i am so interested!!!!!!
**unedited//i don't know how to write a news report**
traffic is slow, crawling along slowly and kennedy taps her fingers against the steering wheel, impatient and without rhythm. she's tired still despite already having one cup of coffee at home and another in a flask sitting in her cup holder but it's obvious the longer she sits there in a barely moving vehicle that it's not the kind of tiredness that yearns for sleep. no; she's tired of the days melding together into one, the routine of waking up and going to work and coming back home only to the exact same thing the next day.
with a heavy sigh, she reaches for the radio in the hopes that music of any kind with soothe the restlessness she feels. but when she hears the spoken voices of the two radio hosts, she signs again. it's just her luck that she'd tune in on the news break. she can't bring herself to flick between stations however so she sinks back in her seat, letting it play.
"good morning, listeners, and welcome back to newsbeat radio. i'm your host, nick harding."
"and i'm your other, more talented host; mai vinh. we've got a truly baffling story to discuss this morning, don't we, nick?"
"you can say that again! in a shocking twist of fate, missing person mc renfield has reappeared after disappearing exactly ten years ago. the circumstances that they've returned under are just as mysterious as the ones they disappeared - it's almost like something out of a movie."
kennedy feels her heart stop beating as she rips her eyes away from road ahead to the radio, as if expecting to see the mc right there. their face flashes through her mind; every word spoken, every laugh, every shared look between her and them plays on a loop and she feels as if she's reliving each one.
mai takes her turn on the mic. "someone call hollywood! after a decade full of dead ends, the community can finally breathe a sigh of relief knowing that mc is alive and seemingly well. but the question on everyone's mind is, where have they been all this time?"
"the authorities have been tight-lipped with the details of their investigation," nick says, taking on a somewhat annoyed tone of voice. "but i've got some theories. i think we're dealing with something much more complex than your average kidnapping."
as if a switch has been flipped, kennedy suddenly feels as though she breathe again and she's already in the process of turning her car around when the conversation goes back to mai.
"watch out listeners, nick's got his tinfoil hat on!" she jokes. "i can't wait to hear what conspiracies you've come up with."
in a strange and sudden burst of anger, kennedy slams her hand against the off button, silencing the radio and leaving a tenseness hanging in the air. the nerve of them, she thinks. mc is a real person that people care about and yet they're treating the case like its a joke. she grips the steering wheel tight as she presses her foot down on the accelerator.
she has to see them, she has to make sure that they're okay, that they really are back. alive and well. safe. she wouldn't be able to function otherwise.
and she knows exactly where to go first.
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kidsinsaturn · 2 years
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shisui courting you
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[🗼] first part of shisui general headcanons because he is my distinguished little gentleman
also I'm working with all your requests but they won't be posted until next week because I'm going out and also you guys have so many original ideas I don't wanna mess them up aaaaa
characters: shisui uchiha
genre: sfw; non massacre au
warnings: gn!reader; shisui courting reader; spying ??; minor obsessive traits
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...
...
...
-from the moment shisui laid his eyes on you, he was slightly becoming obsessed with you. not in the yendere-like way, but in an intense adoration kind of way
-so uchihas love very hard right? and since my baby boy is a rational uchiha, he knew that he had to use this newfound love in the right way
-i don't think he'd have many preferences when it comes to a s/o, but he definitely set for someone who shares his ideals about the village
-his devotion for his village is quite deep, so if he meets someone who would also give their life to save konoha (or their own village) then that would be a huge plus for him
-shisui would fall for someone who is protective of their ideals, someone kind and positive but not submissive. he wouldn't like to see you bottling up your thoughts or feelings because you feel inferior
-he loves seeing you passionate about the things you love–which he would slowly take an interest in–, so regardless of how many talents or hobbies you have, he loves seeing you doing them
-he doesn't really care about your physique, as long as you are healthy. he would love if you had any interest in physical activities since he loves corporal interactions, and he would love if you had any training/walks together
-before shisui even thinks of confessing to you, he will court you in the most gentleman yet flirty way he could come with. he is very original with everything he does, with every thing he gives you or any encounter you two have
-as I said before, shisui would become a little obsessed with you from the moment he met you; he felt these strange connection and attraction with you, and as you both were having more moments together, he fell for you, hard
-since he is a very skilled and agile ninja, regardless of your civil rank, he will silently observe you from afar; every time he has free time, he would spend it observing you, what you do, what you like, he would learn your schedule
-shisui is very attentive, it comes naturally since he's been involved in the shinobi world since childhood, so to him it isn't weird or creepy to watch someone in detail
-so before talking to you, shisui would like to know what you do, you like, so he doesn't come off as awkward
-he looks so confident talking to you that you can't help but find his good posture, lighthearted smile, and charming charisma so attractive
-shisui would be so alert for the littlest pinch of interest from you. that is enough to make him continue
-he doesn't give up though, if you want to act tough and hard to get, he will notice !! he doesn't fall into those traps, he is very good at reading people and seeing through them
-so it wouldn't take too long for you to be smitten with shisui's charms, he is just so lovable and hard to miss; you won't even notice when your harmless conversations turned into flirty comments at each other
-shisui would want to be the one to confess. ok he probably thinks too much about this instead of letting everything go smoothly, but he loves you already and he wants your relationship to be perfect
-he would wait for the perfect moment; he is certain you reciprocate his feelings and that you want something with him. he would probably confess in the most random moment
-you would think he would plan a very detailed date with a bunch of flowers, but not really. it would be at your regular trainings/walks, while you are at ease, he would suddenly go quiet and then look at you intensely, whispering a soft "I've liked you from a long time," then he would pause for a second, not waiting for your response, "would you give me the honor of calling you my girlfriend/boyfriend?"
-after you say yes–because why wouldn't you–then shisui would pick you up, spinning you around careful not to hurt you. he would ask you if you let him kiss you, then he would give you one long kiss in your lips, then he would pepper your face with so many kisses you can't help but giggle
-shisui would ask you to tell him you love him, and the second those words leave your mouth, he would never grow tired from hearing them, extremely happy and pleased when you repeat those words
-and now you have established a relationship with the most charming, lovely, gorgeous boy out there, who comes with first class attention, endless hours of fun, and just the best boyfriend material
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dreamedge · 2 months
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AO3 tag game :3
shout-out to @ragecndybars for the tag! <3 I got to think a lot about some older fics and also the deep, eternal impact CC has has on my soul, so I'm emotional rn lol.
How many works do you have on AO3?
21! Which is, a lot more than I thought tbh. I've been writing these long, long fics for so many years now that I've sort of forgotten about all the little ones I've managed in between. And even the long ones add up after a while. Though, I did only import a small selection of my fics from ff.net, so the back catalogue of stuff I've actually written is way longer. ... That's fine, some of that stuff can stay buried lol.
Even at 21 though... *Looks at my shoebox of story ideas and outlines* Its... its still not enough. Its, its just no where close to even making a dent in everything I want to write eventually.
What’s your total AO3 word count?
650,444. I'm pretty sure at least half of that is entirely in CC, and another quarter is in can i bleed. Which, tbh I'm not sure how I feel about that lol. Deeply introspective fics, my passion, my talent, my beloathed. Some part of me does miss simply writting 5k chapters and calling it done for a week. Not all of me though.
How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?
Only 10! That number probably isn't going to grow much either. I tend to gravitate towards bigger projects these days rather than simple oneshots or even like, 5 chapter long stuff, so I tend to go all in on a small number of fandoms instead of spreading my attention around, even though I want to.
Cardcaptor Sakura
Digimon
Dragon Age Inquisition
Percy Jackson
Persona 3
Power Rangers RPM
RWBY
Teen Wolf
Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle
BNHA
Top five fics by kudos:
A Most Precious Thing (Tsubasa): tbh this being number one is an absolute surprise, though I'm very happy about it. According to AO3, this was published almost 10 years ago, will be 10 years exactly in just a few weeks, but people still regularly give it kudos and comments. It was a complete experiment, style wise; I'd never written anything like it before, I've written one thing like it since, and I'm just so thankful that people loved it so much despite the inexperience behind it.
Of the Woods (Teen Wolf/CCS): This being so high up is not a surprise, and I'm annoyed about it. Mostly bc I know its only so high up bc its for such a big fandom, written during said fandom's height. I think its probably one of the fic I've soured the most on since I wrote it; its just not that great.
Crests Corrupted (Digimon) : Oh, here it is. My masterpiece. Maybe its weird to say that of the fic that's only 3rd, but it truly is, and to see a fic I have put so much of myself into being even this high and this appreciated means so much to me.
can i bleed within your love (Persona 3) : Hi! I don't have much to say about this one, only that I'm so happy with the sheer outpouring of love this has gotten, and I can't wait to finish it.
True Feelings Chocolate (Digimon) : Oh, um, I sort of forgot about you. What are you doing here? ...This is awkward, I really didn't expect this to do so well. Its just a silly little fic I wrote for valentine's one year. I'm glad it did well?
Do you respond to comments?
I try! I don't succeed a lot of the time; generally I'm very tired after posting a chapter and then its been like two weeks and responding feels awkward. Also I tend to ramble, if you haven't noticed yet, some sometimes I'll just close out of responding to avoid any chance of me accidentally spoiling or saying something I shouldn't. I'm... working on it.
What’s the fic with the angstiest ending you’ve ever written?
Oh that's easy. Its the RWBY one, Your Love on Your Sleeve and Your Pain Buried Deep. I don't tend to write angsty fics, I like happy endings, I think this is the only one I've ever written and I'm glad to keep it that way.
Do you write crossovers?
I've written one before, the TW one that's up there. I generally tend to prefer fusions over straight up crossovers; I've gotten several P3 fusions planned, a PJ fusion, the bnha fic I wrote is a fusion. I just, I love fusions. I greatly prefer writing them over cross-overs generally.
Have you ever gotten hate on a fic?
Once or twice, but that was ages ago and I've mostly blocked it from my memory. The fandoms I'm in now have been full of such lovely people, I've been really lucky.
Do you write smut?
Smut, as in the fic happens to have a sex scene? Not typically, but I'm not against doing so when the need calls. Smut, as in the entire point of the fic in the sex scene? No. I'm actually very bad at it. I'll do it if I must but I find even writing kiss scenes awkward, let alone everything else. I will gladly leave it to people much better at their craft them I am.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
To the best of my knowledge? No I don't think so.
Have you ever had a fic translated?
I've had people offer? I don't know if they ever did or even if, in my general ineptitude when it comes to responding to people, I actually agreed they could.
Hey, if anyone wants to translate my works, feel free!
What’s your all-time favorite ship?
... Hey, thats not fair.
Hmmm, well, after much thinking I'm gonna go with Kurogane/Fai from TRC. Other ships may currently have their hooks in my brain, but kurofai is a big comfort to me still, I really love them. And lets be honest. Ain't no one doing it like those two.
What’s a WIP that you want to finish, but don’t think you ever will?
I have, its not posted anywhere, and technically I've barely started writing it, its almost entirely outline rn, but I do have a p3 fantasy au thats just... fucking massive. Its a huge project just from the outline i have, long even in comparison to CC, so long that I doubt I'd ever finish it to the point where I've barely started it.
What are your writing strengths?
Combat. I write a damn good fight scene and I know it. I take a lot of pride in that. I also tend to have a pretty solid grasp of pacing on an overall level for longer fics. Per chapter pacing gets a bit more eh, but the overall pacing of arcs and stuff for my longer fics, I generally know what I'm doing.
What are your writing weaknesses?
I never know when to shut the fuck up! This is a problem I've known I've had for years. I just let characters go on these long, internal monologues, which is only acceptable because I also write deeply introspective fics. However, it tends to slow chapters down a lot and after a bit, characters repeat themselves and its a problem.
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fics?
I'm incapable bc I'm monolingual but I've always loved fics that use other languages! Maybe I can do that some day lol.
What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?
Yknow, if I dug far far far back in my ff.net account it would probably be Naruto? I think. My memory is fuzzy and I'm not actually going to go look. However, thats the first one I posted.
The *very* first fic i ever wrote, I have a very clear memory of for some reason. It was a FFX2/Series of Unfortunate Events crossover, I was in the fourth grade, I thought it was the coolest thing. Hm, memories.
What’s your favorite fic you’ve written so far?
I actually have two answers for this, which, I know is against the spirit and rule of the question BUT. Too bad.
One is A Most Precious Thing, bc it was such an experience to write. Despite being 10 years old I still love it. It was, as I said above, an utter experiment. It is written entirely in 2nd person, which is not actually a choice? I made? Um, I tried, very hard in the beginning, to write in in my standard 3rd, and it didn't work. The story actively refused to be written as such and I kept ending up back in 2nd. And at some point I just gave up and wrote the rest of it as such. And it taught me, so much, about point of view and how that relates to emotional distance, and really, but trusting myself with my writing, that even if I can't say why this is happening, somewhere deep down there is a reason to it and I should trust that. As a writer who takes my craft very seriously, this one has a soft spot in my heart bc of all of that.
However, Crests Corrupted owns a piece of my soul that I will never get back. It is my thesis, my masterpiece, It has defined years of my life, I have poured hundreds of thousands of words into it, I have given it so much of my heart and my pain. It has redefined how I approach writing, it has shaped, totally, the style in which I write today. Even years from now, even years after I finally finish it whenever that is, I don't think I will ever be truly free of it. It is my favorite. How can't it be?
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toburnup · 1 year
Note
I usually don’t really like pov switching in fics bc like you said for me it disrupts the flow of the story and sometimes I like not knowing what the other person thinks and feels and their intentions bc it feels like I’m living the story with the person whose pov it is, but let me tell you, you blew my mind with the Eddie chapters. It was so interesting to look inside his brain and to see his point of view and realize that I, just like Steve, was blind to some things. Like how Steve was always the one to show up unannounced, how he could spend a week without coming not knowing Eddie was waiting for him bc he’d come every day before that. And to see that Eddie was also blind to some things like Steve’s alcohol problems (from what I understood he noticed but didn’t realize how bad it actually was?). And I also loved that those chapters weren’t just a retelling of Steve’s chapters word for word, it just felt like I was watching a montage of some moments through Eddie’s eyes, the ones that were memorable to him and maybe the ones that he still thinks about. I’m sorry for this essay, I just wanted to tell you that this fic has already become one of the best ones I’ve ever read in any fandom, thank you for this. I hope you know how talented you are❤️ Can’t wait for the next chapter!
💙💙 i'm!!!! ahh!! i'm so happy! writing eddie's pov was both very fun, and also very clarifying for myself.
also :) the examples you gave! love them. and i want to get into both a little more, so.... rambling below the cut!!
steve letting days go by without visiting because he doesn't realize eddie is waiting!! such a big misstep between them both. in steve's (slight, biased) defence, he didn't know that bothered eddie. steve said (fairly early on) that he "can't tell if you want me to keep coming over" and eddie's response sums up the different way they communicate their feelings. eddie doesn't say, "yes, i want you to come over." he says "if i didn't want you here, you wouldn't be." which is very different in terms of messaging. less direct. also untrue, lol. but steve is more comfortable with verbalizing that kind of thing so he follows it up with "so you want me to stay?" and eddie doesn't answer, just holds out his hand, which is an answer of sorts.
but steve asks again: "is that you saying it?" so that's 3 times that steve is asking this question of do you want me here? and eddie is unable to answer. because to him, admitting that he wants steve there is admitting that he notices when he's not, that something fundamental is missing. that he's lonely. and it's much easier to tolerate being alone when you don't think of it that way.
eddie not realizing the extent of steve's drinking - they wouldn't have the language for this, but eddie's dad was pretty much a functioning alcoholic. like in the opening section of eddie's first pov chapter, his dad is drunk when he drives them out into the storm. i've both struggled w/ addiction, and later on worked with people in recovery, and some people are able to live their lives while being heavily addicted w/o their communities noticing. eddie knew his dad was drunk because he'd seen it happen so many times, but it was also normal for his dad to be drunk and not necessarily act like it. so steve's own drinking wouldn't really be a red flag for him, it's just something he Notices and then moves on from. he's not concerned because why would he be?
the only time it seems to bother him (from steve's pov) is when steve drives over drunk on new years, but even then, from eddie's pov we see that his irritation isn't from steve being drunk at all. it doesn't really register for him like that. he moves steve's car, lets him climb into bed. he's just annoyed because he thinks steve has been avoiding him (not visiting) since he was "back in hawkins" after christmas. this isn't a judgement of eddie that i'm making, either. i think he's a victim of circumstance in a similar way steve s in this particular instance.
a montage of some moments through Eddie’s eyes, the ones that were memorable to him and maybe the ones that he still thinks about - nothing much to add, i just really really like how you phrased this. lovely.
as i went through steve's chapters and picked out some sections to write eddie's pov, there were a few that i wrote bits of, or added to. i had a lot of fun writing the sections where steve's perception misaligned with eddie's. or when he'd say things when he was drunk or post-orgasm lmao, and wouldn't necessarily remember.
super long answer. thank you for sending this message!!
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musette22 · 2 years
Note
Happy Birthday Minnie! 🥳️
I know it's tomorrow but I wanted to drop into your asks nice and early because I have so much I want to say to you.
First of all, I hope you have the most wonderful day surrounded by your friends, family and loved ones! 🎂🎈
Secondly, I am in awe at how big and kind your heart is! You're such a beautiful person inside and out and you really make this space on the internet a lovely place to be! 🙌 You've cultivated such a welcoming corner of the fandom for people. That's not an easy feat and I know how much time and effort you put into it. I hope you know how appreciative I and the fandom are that you're in it 💗 You're such a great warrior for these boys and you defend them with all your heart and soul. I know that Chris and Sebastian would be so happy to know you're in their court 🥰️
Thirdly, you're such a huge cheerleader for the fandom! ✨ No matter how long people have been in this fandom, you've encourages, supported and helped people find their footing and feel safe to create content ❤️️
Fourthly, I want to say that I am so excited to read your ShrunkyBang fic Calico Skies. I know it's been a long time in the works and you are such a talented writer! You put so much care and love into your writing, it emanates from the screen. It's impossible to tell you how much I love your writing (and I still haven't even head half of it yet!). I'm slowly but surely making my way through it because it's so comforting and a wonderful world to enter 💖
I tried my hardest to catch a net around Chris and Sebastian, but unfortunately they were too tall for me and I don't think I could fit them in the post box to make their way over to you 😭 I'll keep working on one of those quantum regulators Ant-Man has to shrink them down for next year, but for now I thought I'd make you a little something. One of my favorite Evanstan fics is Heat Wave because I loooove the way you write Chris and Sebastian. Chris flirting with Seb, Seb being caught off-guard, Chris realising how much he likes flirting with Seb... then making out against the wall 😳😳😳 It's hot and funny and sooooo well written. I wish I could hug you irl and tell you to your beautiful face how wonderful it is! Instead, I made you a little moodboard to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 🎉
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Have an amazing day, sweetheart! Thanks for everything you do for these fandoms and these boys. I know that there's so many more fans here because of you and how welcoming and wonderful you are. I adore you. Meeting you this year was one of my personal highlights, and I know one day we'll meet again! 💖😘
Oh Tej 😭😭😭 I'M CRYING. I don't deserve you, not even remotely.
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I swear to god, earlier tonight I was like 'I miss Tej, I'm gonna send her a message soon to tell her how much I admire and adore her' and then I opened tumblr and there you were, sending ME the most incredible, lovely, super duper sweet message 🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖 You beat me too it, my sweets!
I genuinely don't even know how to thank you for all your kindness and support, all your sweet words and encouragement and love, I MEAN YOU ARE SO WONDERFUL AND I AM JUST ONE SMALL ME AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL 😭😭😭
I can't even begin to tell you how grateful I am for your friendship. It means so much and I am SO glad we got to meet face to face this year 🥺💖 I'm right there with you in wishing we meet again soon!!! Sharing this fandom with you is an honour, honestly. I could literally repeat all the nice things you said about me and my writing right back at you, and it still wouldn't cover it!
My love, I hope you enjoy my latest fic even a fraction as much as I know I'm going to adore yours when I FINALLY get to read it this week!!!! I genuinely can't wait. I've been looking forward to this for agessss. AND YOU MADE A MOODBOARD FOR MY FIC???? Pleeeeeeeaaaaaaaseeee my heart is exploding, it's so wonderful. I love it and you SO much ❤️❤️❤️❤️ Thank you for the early birthday wishes, thank you for being the most wonderful (friend, writer, fan, human). I ❤️ you.
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vatt-world · 19 days
Text
hi
Enter Mr. DiMaggio
Tom hasn't sent you a copy of the new song yet, has he?
I don't think it's finished.
Great.
Three weeks till we start rehearsing,
we've only got eight songs and half the book.
You know, Derek, I've been reading a lot about Marilyn,
and watching the DVDs,
and I'd really like it if…
I'd really like to get together sometime
and just work on her.
Well, that's what we're doing, darling.
//
I know what happened. I didn't get the part.
Look, the script and the songs aren't even finished yet.
There's a lot of changes coming fast.
We just needed someone with more experience with that.
Well, she's lucky.
It's a great part, and the songs are amazing.
So, how do you feel about being in the ensemble?
Well, it's a terrific opportunity. // It's a great project, and the music is incredible.
When does it start?
Well, it's a workshop,
so they haven't finished casting it
or even writing it, so their dates are flexible.
It's one of those.
Wait, one of what?
Just you end up missing a lot of shifts with those things.
And you know they pay next to nothing, right?
And you're already taking this weekend off?
I'm going to Iowa for a baby shower.
Yeah.
If you're gonna keep doing a lot of those workshops,
that's the kind of thing that goes out the window.
Doesn't it want to be a little more ballad-y?
I like the Sinatra swing idea.
I just think it… I think it needs more heart.
I think it sounds amazing.
Thank you, Ellis.
Here, let me do that for you.
I know, I know, I'm going.
I have to get the dry-cleaning.
And you have to be at the dentist at 4:00.
No, no, no!
You're doing it.
I'm getting my teeth cleaned.
"No, no, no."
I like him. Why do you not like him?
I don't have to like everybody.
You don't like Derek.
Do you like Derek?
I do, actually.
You like Derek.
I think he's talented.
You know what?
Those two tigers that ended up eating siegfried and Roy were talented too.
That's ridiculous.
It's not ridiculous, it's true.
That was a tragedy.
That's my point.
Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
That's all Joe and Marilyn wanted.
They just wanted to be a normal couple.
That's not all they wanted.
At this moment, in this song, it is.
Speaking of Joe, Eileen and Derek apparently went to see
Michael at that Bruno Mars thing down at La Mama.
They loved him.
Well, if he's doing // How many more do I need to see?
My eyes are about to start bleeding.
We can take a five and start talking offers.
Yeah, that sounds brilliant.
Okay.
These are our top picks
for DiMaggio, Arthur Miller, and JFK. // incredible selling stuff sounds amazing oxford bleeding swing simple idea long shot workshop pay showbiz gift for me can i ask a question im fine
They made an offer to Michael.
I'm telling you, Tom, it's a long shot.
He's not gonna do it.
There she is.
What happened to the beard?
Your mom hated it.
Look at you. You need help, mom?
Let me get that, honey. Y-you go on in.
Okay.
Bring half of New York with ya?
// I didn't get the lead, but it was a total long shot anyway.
I'm gonna be in the ensemble. I'm so excited.
It's a workshop, so I'm…
I'm getting in on the ground floor,
and the people who are writing it
are, like, the top New York composers.
It's… it's totally a huge opportunity.
So, what does this workshop pay?
200 a week.
Will they hold your job for you while you do it?
Roger!
I got it, mom. Thanks.
Daddy…
I'm really glad to be here.
And tomorrow I'm going to marlena's baby shower
and for two days, I'm not gonna even think about Broadway.
// Derek, can I…
Can I ask you a question?
Sure.
Why don't we ever go to your place?
Oh, God.
What?
It's ridiculous, really.
My neighbors on the floor below, um,
they've just installed a new stove.
Stove.
Yeah.
You know, one of those giant things.
You know, it takes up half a room.
It's so big, it has to have entirely new gas pipes,
so they've turned off the gas, and now they've broken the gas,
and now I have no gas.
You can laugh.
But the whole building's a wreck.
My kitchen's a disaster area. I can't even boil an egg.
No…
It's not funny.
No, no, I just…
I thought you didn't want me in your home or something.
Darling.
I want you everywhere.
So, no worries, all right?
nothing can beat the view
when as far…
as the eye can see
there's…
No one but Mr.
No one but Mrs.
Smith and…
I'm sorry we got into a fight.
Me too.
I've got to tell you something.
No, it's okay.
I know I'm uptight about Derek, and I need to relax.
No. Well, yes. That's true.
But I've got to tell you something else.
Just the history with him is so terrible, and I just…
I love Ivy so much…
I had an affair with Michael swift.
Five years ago.
When we were working ready money.
// I'm fine.
I'm great.
Do you know that even being in the chorus of a workshop
is so much bigger than so many people ever get to do?
This is good, what's happening to me.
It's good.
I'm good.
I know, I…
I just, uh…
Want to give you this.
Dad, I…
I'm your dad.
The Cost of Art love the first day table read art history major new number new idea sound fantastic diva saw you
irst day. I love first days.
Me too.
I am so glad that you're doing this.
Me too.
Exciting, isn't it?
Hi, Linda. Where am I?
You and Tom are here, Derek's there. // Okay, obviously we're not gonna have a table read
because the book is still somewhat in flux.
This'll be primarily for the ensemble.
We'll put the rest in when the book is in better shape.
We'll be staging some of the numbers.
Others will be at music stands.
We'll have some costume elements,
a few props but basically…
It's up to you to sell it.
Now remember…
This is a workshop.
The road to Broadway is exceedingly long.
So…
Let's get to it. //// Julia, you told me once that you were
an art history major.
Yeah.
If that were a real Degas, what would you pay for it?
That?
It is a real Degas.
Yeah.
Here's a lesson they should teach in school //
Why is he sending messages through you?
If he wants to know about the new number
he can just ask me.
I'm sure he will.
I know he's not your favorite person.
What are you talking about?
I love him. What a stellar human being.
A role model for us all.
He better treat you right, that's all I have to say.
I'm a big girl, Tom. I can take care of myself.
// Okay, new idea. Karen, step back next to Bobby.
What's wrong?
Let's take it from the dance break.
Again! Five, six, seven and…
Sorry…
You okay?
Yeah, yeah, I'm just…
Hey, when you do this in the theater, //
no one here to disapprove
as we review the lessons
you've been missing
Okay, guys.
Give a girl a chance.
Yeah, she's right.
There's too much sound in the mix, Tom.
It's eight voices.
They sound fantastic.
It's just… at least while I'm learning it.
Sure, sure. Karen, why don't you sit this one out?
I can tone it down.
It's just for now.
//
I know, I get it, I'm just… I'm saying
you didn't have to pull a diva on her.
I didn't even pull half a diva.
And trust me, they never would have cut her
just to make me feel better.
Ivy, baby, it's not like I know this chick.
I'm not all worried about her feelings,
it's just… oh, no, look at this.
What?
My Mets, they have, //
I saw you, Derek.
Saw me what?
That woman.
I saw you. Everybody saw you.
Saw me what, flirting?
Your hand was on her ass.
Ivy.
Everyone at this party is a potential investor, okay?
So, yeah, I am gonna flirt, and I'm gonna put my hand
on the asses of pretty women
if it makes them feel that our show
is the one they want to throw millions of dollars at.
It's meaningless.
How come you didn't tell me you cast Karen?
She didn't get the part.
You did.
They loved you tonight.
This is who you are now.
Get used to it.
0 notes
midwinter-whump · 29 days
Text
LD Lab Rats Pt. 5
NEXT
Food poisoning,
Dinner took far too long to arrive. Liithal was used to eating every three hours, so after seven hours of being in a cell, and not having eaten for a few hours before that, she was starving.
It was the droid who came by and deposited ration sticks into compartments that the captives could access from inside the cells. Liithal's stomach growled at the thought of food, even in ration form. She picked it from her compartment, and sniffed it. It smelled sweaty. "Hey, um...." She looked over to Jay's cell, since he was the only person she could see, "He doesn't put anything in these, does he?"
"No, they're just plain old ration bars. They'll keep you from starving, keep you at a balanced diet, but they're bland and unsatisfying." He spun his own bar in his hand a couple times before biting into it.
'Balanced diet'? Liithal was a little worried about that. It had taken weeks for her to learn to navigate safe foods out in the galaxy. Meat was hidden in so many things she never expected, especially rations. But.... she was hungry and didn't have options.
Once the droid was gone, Liithal decided to make a plan while they ate. "How many of us are there?"
"Seven, including you." Jay's eyes fell, "I've only been here a couple weeks, but in that time three other prisoners died. Some of them are just too young to keep up with this kind of experimentation."
"What does he want with us? He told the Rebellion he was developing weapons to give us an upper hand!"
Jay paused, a knuckle to his mouth as he thought. "He has been working on a way to control Force sensitives. He already has a way to incapacitate us, but if he hasn't considered any of us suitable candidates yet. A lot of the tests have been combat trials and Force ability tests. He went through a lot of effort to take me, but after he realized I don't wield the Force anymore he moved me to the control group."
Liithal craned her head to look both ways down the hall, but no one else was within view. "If everyone here is Force sensitive, why can't we use that to break out?"
"Because they're all teenagers who've never been trained. What about you? Can you use it to open the cells?"
Liithal shook her head, "I'm not that talented. I can sense other people, and I used it a couple times to jump really high, but that's it."
"That's enough! I can teach you enough to break everyone out. We'll wait for your friends to get back and meet them. We'll begin after lights out."
-----------
Night came and the lights dimmed, but no training happened. Liithal's stomach roiled and burned. She curled on the floor to try to cool her fevered skin, and whimpered with every wave of pain. She could hear Jay shouting for help, but none came.
She was hit with a particularly strong wave of nausea and crawled over to the toilet and just leaned over it for a while. She felt warm and dizzy and everything else just fell away. Then her body took over. Her stomach clenched, sweat dripped, and suddenly she was expelling all the food and water from her stomach. Once. Twice. She threw up until she was dry heaving and sobbing.
Eventually she just laid back on the floor, her occasional heaving wasn't bringing up anything anyway. She was shivering now, and exhausted, and empty. She hated this. She was supposed to be getting ready for a breakout, not lying pathetic on the floor!
......
............She missed her friends. Sol had a way of scooping her up and holding her that made her feel protected, and then he'd make fun of her until she forgot anything was wrong. Rin was inspiring, and made Liithal feel ready to face the world head-on. And Jim..... was Jim. He would have laughed at that. He could make anyone smile during hard times.
As she fell into sleep, she prayed that they would come back soon.
0 notes
mypoisonedvine · 4 years
Text
The Perfect Fit | Bucky Barnes x reader (part 2)
(part 1)
summary: after getting fitted by you, bucky’s going to try on the custom-made suits he’s bought.  unless he makes his move now, he may not get to see you again, and he can’t let that happen.
word count: 6.5k
warnings: smut!!, fingering, oral (m and f receiving), a little d/s energy, mirror kink, stomach bulge kink, slight pain kink?, creampie kink, pussy spanking, light bondage, bucky being jealous
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Bucky had a bone to pick with Tony, which was usually true but this wasn’t work-related for once.  It wasn’t hard to find him in the same place he’d seen him last— eating his lunch in the kitchen, with Sam nearby chowing down on lo mein with a spring roll.
“Hey lefty, what’s cracking?” Tony greeted, mouth full but talking loudly anyways.  
"I went down to that tailor you recommended—" Bucky began, but Tony was quick to interrupt.
"You went there?  Dude, it's a really nice place, you can just call and she'll come to you instead, way more convenient."
"So now you say 'she'?"
Realization dawned on Tony’s expression.  "Ahh, I get it.  You're not used to a female tailor.  Adds a little spice to getting fitted, huh?" he grinned, elbowing Bucky playfully.
Bucky’s throat felt a little dry when he heard that.  "Don't tell me that's why you use her…"
"Hey now, I'm not a creep, I use her cause she's the best, and those house calls are great for discretion— you know, being a celebrity and all.  The eye candy part is just gravy."
"Gravy candy sounds disgusting," Sam chimed in, missing the point entirely.
"Yeah, well, she mentioned some stuff that sure made you sound like a creep."
"Okay, well, you can't blame me for getting caught staring when I'm surrounded by fucking mirrors.  Makes it hard to be stealthy."
"You could try not staring,” Bucky suggested flatly.
"Is that what you did?"
Tony smirked when Bucky failed to reply immediately.  "Okay, so it's easier said than done,” Bucky admitted with a frown, “but still, I hope these house calls were strictly professional."
“What’s it to you, man?  I think somebody’s jealous,” Tony purred.  
“What?  No, it’s not that,” Bucky denied.
“You love her,” Tony sing-songed, completely ignoring Bucky.  “You looooooove her!”
"You are so immature," Bucky rolled his eyes, even though his heart was racing and he was pretty sure he was blushing.  
"No, it's good for you!  She's a catch, you're all brooding and stuff— maybe she can melt the Winter Soldier's frozen heart, hm?"
Sam laughed heartily.  "Stark, you read too many comic books."
"You're saying you don't wanna see Icy Hot here shoot his shot with my tailor?" Tony asked, turning his attention towards Sam.
Sam pondered that, much to Bucky's dismay.  "Depends.  How hot is she?"
"Mega," Tony smirked confidently.  "Legs for miles, and she wears these skirts that make her ass look—"
"I think I've heard enough," Bucky groaned.  "I'm leaving.  And don't ask when I'm going to see her again," he instructed, interrupting Tony just as he'd opened his mouth to speak, "because I won’t tell you.”
As Bucky left, he could hear Tony calling out into the hall: “But I’d be such a great wingman!”
//
Truth be told, Bucky had put off mastering the use of his smartphone.  It wasn’t just that new technology made him feel old, but that he knew nobody would be calling or messaging him anyways; if the phone didn’t work, he would spare himself the embarrassment of waiting up for nothing.
But once he knew you were going to call?  Suddenly, he was motivated to figure the sucker out.
A few hours later and now all he had to do was stare at it to make sure he wouldn’t miss you.  Luckily, you didn’t make him wait too long.  He recognized the number and decided to let it ring a few times before picking up, so it would seem like he had other things to do besides talk to you.
“Hello?” Bucky asked when he answered, so it would seem like he had other people calling him besides you.
You introduced yourself so formally that he was a little afraid that all that fun energy between you two would be gone.  Thankfully, once he asked what you were calling about, you were back to being cheery and casual again.
“I was just calling to schedule when I could come by with your new suits!” you explained, sounding chipper.
His fingertips were a little tingly just from hearing you talk, nervousness making him antsy (in a weirdly good way).  “I know you said it’s a one-person operation,” he responded smarmily, “but I figured you would outsource delivery.”
You scoffed, though it sounded more amused than irritated.  “It’s not just delivery, I have to check the fit and make sure everything’s exactly to your liking.”
“Oh, well, I’m free all day tomorrow— and I think you already know my address.”  Was it too forward?  Too obvious?  And why did Bucky spend half the time when he was talking to you second-guessing himself?
“Yes, Stark Tower is a relatively common destination for me.  If he doesn’t mind us using it, Tony has a dressing room with plenty of mirrors so you can get a good look.  But, I’d be happy to just go up to your quarters if that’s easier.”
He was not at all ready for you to see his room.  No way he could clean it enough in the next twelve hours; and even then, lots of the team had made fun of how empty and plain it was, so he knew it would just make you think he was boring.
“I’m sure Tony won’t mind you using his dressing room, but he might mind me using it,” Bucky chuckled.
“Well, if he makes a fuss I’ll be sure to set him straight,” you decided confidently.  Somehow, imagining you cursing out Tony was almost hotter than imagining you doing anything else.  “Be sure to bring down your dress shoes so you get the full look and everything.”
“Uhhh…” he trailed off as he scratched the back of his head, trying to remember if he owned anything other than combat boots.  “Not sure I still have those, to be honest.”
"Okay, you'll need shoes too,” you noted aloud, your voice a little distant; he figured you were writing things down, which was why you sounded distracted.  “What size are you?"
"Thirteen."
"I'll bring a selection tomorrow,” you announced firmly.  “And socks, of course.  And some watches, maybe?  And pocket squares."
"Is that it?" he asked sarcastically.
“Oh right, I’m bringing the ties you picked out, too.  I’ll throw in some alternates in case your original choices don’t match the way you were hoping.”
“You really are full-service,” he chuckled.
“I get that a lot,” you replied, a hint of coyness to your tone.
There it was again; that jealousy.  He hated it because he knew it was wrong, but he couldn’t stop it either.  As much as his mind was completely aware that you were an independent, modern woman capable of handling herself, his heart was equally determined to protect you, and spoil you, and do whatever was necessary to make sure you were safe.  
Worse, his gut was less innocent.  Mine, it demanded, all mine.  Nobody else’s.
He pushed it down and just tried to get through the rest of the call without saying something he’d regret.  You confirmed the date and time with him, and he tried not to be too aggressive when he said he was looking forward to it.  
He hung up his phone and sighed, staring off into space.  Now all that was left to do was wait, and be overwhelmed with anxiety.  Thankfully, he was good at the second thing.
//
"So, what do you think?" 
I think you look so damn good from every angle.  I think I might spend all my money on suits just to be sure I can see you again.  I think you need somebody to love you the way you deserve.  I think you’d look like an angel waking up in my bed.  
You waved your hand in front of his face for a moment, calling his attention back to reality.  “Helloooo?”
Drawn out of his trance, Bucky finally looked in the menagerie of mirrors surrounding him and admired his reflection, amazed by the perfect fit of his first suit.  The difference in quality between this and something off the rack was beyond apparent.  Most of all, your talent was undeniable.  "I think it's beautiful."
You smiled proudly.  "Of course it is, but do you like how you look in it?"
"Honestly?  I feel a bit… out of place.  I'm obviously not classy enough for a suit like this."
"Oh, nonsense," you dismissed.  
He frowned, convinced this was all flattery.  "No, seriously, this is… maybe I should just wear tactical gear to every event."
"Well, you'd still look good, but you're not always a soldier.  Sometimes you're only a man.  And every man should own a fine suit."
It was much too profound of a thing to say while you casually straightened his jacket, only to pop out from behind his reflection to smile at him in the mirror.
“Let’s get the next one on you,” you decided, helping him lose the jacket but having him move into a private dressing room to switch trousers and shirts.  “I put a turtleneck in there instead of just a regular button-up,” you explained through the door as he changed, “in case you wanted to see it that way.”
Once he’d put it on, he stepped back out and you were looking at him so proudly— well, you were looking at your handiwork with pride, really, but he could pretend it was for him and hope actually impress you that much one day.
“I went with a shawl lapel on this one, as opposed to the last one which was notched,” you explained as you traced the line with your finger.  “Spoiler: the next one has a peak lapel.  But enough about that one: what do you think of this one?”
“This looks like something my friend Sam would wear,” Bucky decided as he looked at himself in the cranberry suit and black turtleneck.  The shoes you’d had him try on with this were intricate as well, with subtle stitching in the leather and a shine so immaculate he could almost see a reflection in them.  
“Well, is your friend Sam stylish?” you asked.  
“He would certainly say so,” he smirked.
“I’m inclined to agree, because you—” you gave him a thorough glance up and down, so thorough in fact that he felt a bit exposed under your gaze, “—look marvelous.”
“Not pretentious?” 
“No, no, it works on you,” you assured, “you’ve got the looks for it.”
“And what looks are those?”
“Um… good?  Good looks?” 
He definitely remembered a time when that seemed like the obvious answer, because he had relied on being good-looking for a lot of things in life, but that felt very far away now.  Maybe it was just that people who didn’t know what he’d done could still think he was good looking, but everyone else saw the evil within beginning to leak out the way that he did.  
But you knew what he’d done, didn’t you?  You had to.  You knew Tony, you were here at the Tower… unless you were intentionally not up-to-date on current events, you must have heard of the Winter Soldier.
“Don’t act so surprised,” you huffed, “as if it’s a big secret or something.  You’re obviously very attractive.”
Bucky cleared his throat nervously.  “Uh, thanks.”  He wanted to return the compliment, but thought it might be inappropriate or rude somehow.  You broke the silence quickly as you held up two pocket squares in front of him.
“Which of these do you prefer?” you prompted.  He selected the solid gold one, making you smile.  “I knew you’d pick that one.”
“How?”
“I dunno, just fits you,” you shrugged as you folded it and gently placed it in his pocket.  Even through so many layers, your touch on his chest made his heart flutter.  Your fingers brushing over his as you slipped a watch onto his wrist was enough to cause palpitations.
He looked better in this ensemble than he expected.  This version of himself looked much more likely to be invited to parties than any other version.  If only he actually wanted to go to parties.
You put him in the pinstripe suit last, after putting a few pins in the cranberry suit to indicate minor changes you would make later, and stepped back to ponder your work.
"Hm, unbutton those top two buttons for me?" you requested with a raised eyebrow.
I will if you do, he thought to himself, but silently unbuttoned his own shirt anyway.
"I mean, it definitely works like this, but I wanna see you in a tie.  And I've got juuuuust the one," you smiled.  Soon you were approaching him with a red paisley tie, and helping him button up his shirt and tying the tie for him— you explained something about how it was a unique knot he likely couldn't do himself, but he was too lost in having you so close to notice.  It would be so easy to just reach up and grab your waist, pull you into a kiss, finally tell you how bad he wants you.
Well, it would be physically easy, but it would be very scary.  Just imagining it had his heart racing.
“I heard from Tony this morning,” you informed him suddenly, slipping the tie around his neck and popping his collar up for him.
“Really?  Is he in need of a wardrobe update?”
“Yes, but he hasn’t realized that yet so that wasn’t what he called about.”
He laughed a little at the jab, though it also made him a little worried what secret opinions you held about his own style (or lack thereof).
“We talked about you, actually,” you added.
“O-oh,” Bucky stammered, “uh, he’s not exactly my biggest fan.  So whatever he said probably isn’t true.”
“He said that you have a crush on me,” you replied nonchalantly, not even looking up from your work on his tie.
Bucky gulped, and he knew you saw the bob of his Adam’s apple because you were staring right at his neck.
“Like I said, Tony isn’t a very reliable source,” Bucky replied, but his voice cracked in the middle and he cringed internally.
“I’ll write it off as another one of Tony’s off-color jokes then,” you dismissed, perfecting the knot of his tie and stepping back to observe him.  He always felt nervous when you looked at him like that, like he couldn’t hide anything from you.
“What… what did you say, when he told you that?” Bucky asked nervously.
“I asked him what he was smoking and if I could have some,” you laughed.  “I thought it was totally impossible— and don’t worry, I didn’t tell him that you got hard when I did your inseam.”
Bucky’s throat became dry at the same moment that his palms got clammy.
“I— um, I was just—”
“Oh, it’s fine,” you dismissed quickly, still talking about this all so casually which only made him even more confused, “you’re not the first, it happens.”
“I’m not the first?!” 
“Yeah, if anything you were one of the few who didn’t say something creepy about it, which is always appreciated.  It’s just a bodily reaction, you can’t control it.”
“Did Tony ever say something creepy?” Bucky pressed, his hands involuntarily tightening into fists— another bodily reaction he couldn’t control.
“You know, Tony said you were really worried that he had been inappropriate with me, or even that he and I had a fling or something,” you added as you stepped back, giving him a quizzical look, “and now it’s sort of sounding like he was right.”
“No, no, it’s not that, I just—”
“Was he right about anything else?” you pressed, raising an eyebrow.
“I was being nosy, I’m sorry,” he sighed, “it’s just that… and I know it’s none of my business, but the idea of him and you… it isn’t a pleasant mental image.”
You laughed a little, in a way that made him feel kind of small.  “Why not?  You know how he is.  Definitely has a wandering eye… and occasionally a wandering hand.”
Bucky winced.  “I swear, if he ever put his hands on you, I’ll go find him right now and beat him senseless.”
“What if I wanted him to?”
He nearly saw red, but he knew he had no right to be angry.  You were a grown adult and he had no ownership over you… he just sort of wished that he did.
“So it’s true then?  You and him…?”
“No, Bucky,” you laughed, “it’s not.  Nothing’s ever happened between us.  I generally don’t get involved with clients like that.”
“Generally?  Is there an exception?”
You chewed your lip, seemingly a little thrown off by his question.  “Uh, I mean, no— I’ve never been involved with a client, no, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“Why would you say ‘generally’ then?”
“Uh, I guess I just… I wouldn’t want to rule anything out, that’s all.  Never say never.”
And for a moment he almost wondered if you were flirting with him.  Certainly not, with him having come across as both a jealous hot-head and a bumbling dweeb who pops a boner faster than a randy teenager, but just for a second the way you looked at him was… questionable.
“I mean, who knows,” you continued, “what if, hypothetically, some gorgeous guy walked into my store one night— a sensitive guy, who made me laugh and put up with me rambling about ties for the better part of an hour— and I was supposed to dress him up when all I wanted to do was undress him?”
Your finger started to trail down his chest lightly, tickling his skin through the dress shirt. 
“I wouldn’t want to think he was off-limits just because he’s a customer… right?” you asked quietly, looking up at him and biting your lip.
He was afraid to make the wrong move, but he really really hoped this was flirting.
“I don’t think anyone would object to being dressed or undressed by you,” Bucky responded, hoping he could stay neutral until he was sure what you were talking about.
You chewed your lip, looking away as if you were thinking about something. 
"I know I certainly haven't.  And wouldn't," he added, feeling the need to say something.
You nodded, placing his tie inside his jacket and seeming happy with your work.
“You know, the fit looks great," you announced, "but I’m a little worried that one of the measurements was wrong.  Mind if I do your inseam again?”
His throat was dry all of a sudden, but he responded quickly anyways.  "Uh, go ahead…"
You looked up at him as you started to sink to your knees, very slowly.  That little move looked real good in the mirror behind you.  “Last time I did this, there was something getting in the way, made it difficult to know if I was doing it right…”
"M-my apologies," he whispered.
"Oh no, I'm not complaining," you purred as you slowly began to run your fingers up the side of his leg, keeping searing eye contact until his knees felt a little weak.
When your hand reached the top of his inner thigh, the back of it brushed against his balls and he shivered.  Delicately, and so excruciatingly slowly, your hand moved higher and gently rubbed his erection through the fabric.  
“Fuck,” he whispered under his breath.
It must have been all the anticipation that made it so intense, made shivers run up his spine every time your hand moved over his length, made his toes curl inside the ridiculously fancy shoes you’d put him in.
“I’m gonna take it out now, okay?  I promise I won’t measure you here,” you winked.
"You can if you want," he shrugged, deciding now was the time for feigned confidence if there ever was one.  “I mean, if you’re worried about fit…”
You bit your lip, and he was proud to see the effect his words had on you.  “I’ll be honest, I am a little worried it won’t fit…”  You were quick with his belt, but slow with his button and fly, apparently having more fun teasing him.  “Fuck, Bucky,” you groaned softly as you took his cock out.
“Don’t look so excited, doll, you’ll give me an ego,” he purred.
“Can’t help it,” you sighed, “looks delicious.”
You licked a long wet stripe up from the bottom all the way to the tip, making a show of licking up the bead of pre-cum before taking his head into your mouth, and Bucky blinked a few times to be sure that this was actually happening.
"Been wanting to do that since I first saw you," you admitted, grinning as you stroked him right beside your face, which only helped to illustrate how big he was compared to you.
"Dirty girl," he praised with a smirk.  
Flirting, he wasn’t so good at.  Conversation in any form typically stressed him out.  But this?  This he was still pretty good at.  And he’d never wanted it so bad before.
When you took him in your mouth again, you didn’t stop until you started to gag; he couldn’t stop himself from moaning through his teeth when you did it.
"Look up at me, princess," he instructed softly, grinning when you obeyed quickly.  "Now look over there at that mirror.  Look how good you look on your knees for me, choking on my cock."
You moaned around him when you made eye contact with your own reflection, and it felt so fucking good he almost lost it right then and there. He held your jaw, almost too tightly, and guided you as your head bobbed on his length.  Your mouth was so warm he thought he would burn up— and it only got warmer the deeper he managed to get.  God, he was so ready to pump his load right into your throat, but he wanted to do so much more to you first.  
In one quick motion, he pushed you off of his cock, pulled you up to face him, and flipped you around, holding you to his chest with the metal arm and letting the flesh one start rubbing your thigh.  This way, both of you were looking at the mirror in front of you, and he loved watching you gasp and moan as you felt and watched his fingers move higher and higher.
“I think it’s time to find out if you really are ‘full-service’,” he purred right against your ear, making searing eye contact with you in the reflection.  “You’ve seen so much of me, but I haven’t seen nearly enough of you yet.  Been daydreaming about what you could be hiding under these tight little skirts.”
As he pulled up the plaid-patterned fabric, he saw that you were wearing white, lacy panties and he groaned deeply.  
“What are you wearing these for?” he teased, rubbing along the edge but never getting where you wanted— and he knew you were getting desperate, because your hips were starting to buck up into his hand.  “Were you expecting something would happen today, sweetheart?”
“I— I was hopeful,” you stammered; instantly, he slapped you right on your barely-covered pussy, just hard enough to make you yelp and squirm in his grasp.  
“You’re so shameless,” he chuckled darkly, “and I love it.  I just hope this isn’t your usual routine— acting all innocent and batting your eyes so your clients will fuck you.”
“No, I swear, it’s just you, Bucky,” you whimpered, “there’s nobody else, please…”
“Please what?  Tell me what you want.”
“I want you to… to touch me more,” you whispered, as if it was a secret and not patently obvious.
He slipped two fingers underneath the thin fabric, finding your clit right away (not difficult at all with how swollen it was) and rubbing it in gentle circles.
“Oh god,” you sighed, “Bucky…”
WIth his hand on your hips, it wasn’t hard at all to push you back into him so he could rub his aching cock against you.  
"What material is this skirt made of?" 
"It's a silk blend," you answered breathlessly, "about 30% cotton."
"It's soft," he purred before yanking your skirt up higher and pressing his cock against your ass instead, "but not as soft as you."
Next to go was your blouse, which he tore open to the sound of buttons flying every direction and bouncing off of the mirrors and floors.
"Bucky!" you yelped, but he could see your nipples harden through the lacy white bra.  If there was any doubt that you had intended to seduce him today, the matching undergarments dispelled it.
After teasing your nipples between his fingers for a moment, he reached back down between your legs— and when his fingers slipped through your folds and moved down to your opening, he actually moaned just from how wet you are.
"Fucking hell," he growled, "you are drenched, princess.  You liked sucking me off that much?"
"Not just that," you clarified, "you look really good in my suits."
He gave you a toothy smile in the mirror, using it to nibble on your ear a bit.  "You deserve most of the credit for that," he purred.
"No, no, I don't," you whined, "you'd look sexy in a paper bag, honestly… you turn me on so much, Bucky."
“Did you… think about me?  After I left your shop the other night?” he asked playfully, already foreseeing your answer from the way your thighs clenched and your lips let out the subtlest gasp.
“Yes,” you whimpered.
“You’re smart enough to know I want you to be more specific than that,” he chuckled.
“I thought about you that night… after I got into bed…” you elaborated slowly, clearly distracted by the way he was moving his fingers: delicately, but with obvious intentionality.  “I thought about what it would’ve been like if you had grabbed me and kissed me, shoved me against the wall, fucked me right there on my desk… in front of the glass wall, where anyone could’ve walked by and seen you claim me…”
His cock was throbbing, and he wasn’t sure if it was from the image itself or from the knowledge that you’d been fantasizing about it.  “Were you touching yourself?” he growled.
“Yes,” you sighed, your thighs starting to visibly shake, your knees bending towards each other in the mirror.
“Show me how,” he demanded.  “Show me exactly how you were playing with your needy little pussy while you thought about me.”
Your hand found its place on top of his, your fingers starting to move his to the specific place, guiding his movements to be faster and rougher.
“Oh, I see,” he grinned, “you don’t like to tease yourself, do you?  You like to jump right into it, come as many times as you can and rub yourself raw in the process?”
You nodded feverishly, panting and whining and writhing in his grasp.
“You’re so desperate, honey… such a shameless cockwhore for me.”
“For you,” you repeated through your trance, “Bucky, ‘m close… keep touching me, please…”
He kept his thumb on your clit but gently slid one finger inside you, both of you gasping at the sensation (if for different reasons).
“So tight,” he hissed, already pulling it back out, “fuck, and just for one finger…”
“More, please,” you begged mindlessly.
“More?  Sure you can take it?”
You bit down on your lip as you nodded, and he pushed a second finger in beside his first.  He felt you struggling with it, both in your walls and in the way you winced a little, but you softly begged him to keep going so of course he couldn’t stop.  You adjusted quickly, your wetness starting to run down his hand.  
“Fuck me,” you whimpered, “now, please, can’t wait anymore.”
“Yes you can,” he encouraged, “and you will, cause I need to taste you first.”
Pulling his fingers out of you, he flipped you around again, finally kissing you the way he’d been dreaming of since he first saw you.  It was intense but not too dominating— in spite of everything.  It was a romantic sort of kiss, maybe too romantic for the situation (that being his cock out and hard and pressed against you, and his fingers covered in your arousal) but perfect nonetheless.
“That’s not what I thought you meant when you said you wanted to taste me,” you giggled when he pulled away.
“No, I meant it the other way,” he smiled, “I just wanted to do that first.”  
He picked you up suddenly, making you gasp a bit, but knelt down to lay you on the floor pretty soon after.  You looked up at him with wide eyes as he lifted your leg and kissed his way up.  He could smell your need, and he worried it would drive him wild before he reached his destination.
Pulling your soaked panties aside, he realized he could probably come just from looking at you.  “Such a gorgeous pussy,” he growled his praise, leaning down to plant a few more teasing kisses over the inside of your thighs.  Finally, he started with one long lick, just like you had with him, but you weren’t so patient to tolerate it.  Nearly instantly your fingers pulled his hair, clearly trying to guide him to tease you less, but he couldn’t be swayed to go easy on you.
“I hope you’re not forgetting who’s in charge,” he smiled hungrily.
“And what if I am?” you returned, clearly looking to get on his nerves so he’d get rough with you.  He was happy to oblige.
Bucky sat up and loosened his tie, slipping it off of his neck with a smirk.  "Now, this is 100% Venetian silk, so it should feel nice around your wrists," he cooed.  You offered your hands willingly, and he got a chance to show off a few complex knots of his own.  "Now be a good girl and keep those hands above your head, alright?"
You did as he asked, freeing him to hold your legs open as he devoured you, alternating between teasing your bud with the tip of his tongue, and fucking you with it.  
"You taste like heaven, doll," he growled when he came up quickly, "and the way you moan when my tongue's inside you?  I swear I could die happy right now."
"I wish you wouldn't though," you whimpered.
He laughed a bit before he got back to it, letting his tongue focus on your clit while he filled you with his fingers again.  Your walls clenched down on him occasionally, and when it became more frequent just as your moans became louder, he knew you were close.
"Stop, stop," you sighed suddenly, pushing him away.
"Are you alright?" he asked, nervous he'd done something wrong.  
"No I'm fine, I just… I don't want to come yet.  I want you inside me first."
"And what about what I want, hm?  What if I want to watch you come just from my tongue?" he offered instead, though he was definitely still very persuadable in this regard.
"I know you wanna fuck me, Bucky, don't make me wait any longer,” you moaned, your back arching up a little from the floor.
Not needing to be told twice, he flipped you onto your elbows and knees, making sure you could support yourself with bound wrists before letting you go.  His hands running over your exposed ass and thighs made you shiver, and he smiled down at you.  At this point, he was probably more desperate than you were, but he was doing a much better job of hiding it, even taking the time to reach up and undo a few of the buttons of his shirt, because wow suits are warm and not meant for his level of physical activity.
Still, he figured he had waited long enough— he needed to fuck you while he still had at least a shred of patience left.  He was going to need it if he was going to give you time to adjust to him.
Holding his cock and rubbing it through your folds, he chuckled when you whined and dropped your head down in a pout.  He loved watching your expression shift into a gasp as he pushed in.
He went slow, but he didn't stop either.  He wanted to test you just a little.  He wanted to stretch you open.
"Fuck," you cried, "god, you're so… you feel so…"
"Look in the mirror," he instructed coldly, although the coldness was just a front for the way he was holding himself back as your body swallowed him so beautifully.
You moaned again, higher-pitched and weak, just as he finally got all the way in.  He waited until he felt your body relax a bit before he asked if it was okay for him to move yet.  You answered with a quick nod, a breathy "please," and he didn't need any more encouragement.
It was probably too fast to start off with, but god, he'd been waiting so long to fuck you like this.
"Baby," he whispered, "you're so perfect."
He held you steady and thrusted deep, so deep that it made you gasp each time.  You looked incredible, and you felt incredible, but the way you sounded was just… divine.  He could never have imagined the beautiful way you would sound when he was bringing you pleasure like this.  Having heard it, he wanted to make you sound like this as often as possible from now on.  Technically he couldn’t even be sure he’d get another chance to, but surely sounds this perfect meant you had to be having a good time, right?  Ideally a good enough time to call him again?
He was snapped back to focus when he saw your eyes flutter shut with pleasure.
"Don't look away from that mirror, honey," he growled, "don't close your eyes.  Look how pretty you look like this."
He could tell you loved it from the way your channel fluttered and flexed.
"You like watching yourself get fucked, princess?"
"Yes," you sobbed as he grabbed your hips harder, hoping to leave a bruise, "it feels so good, Bucky, please don't stop!"
"I won't stop, pretty girl.  Not until you cream on my cock," he grunted. 
"Fuck, I'm close," you whined, "Bucky, I'm gonna come— oh god right there!"
And he was sure it couldn’t be fake from the way your body tightened and released so many times, the way you quivered and your breathing seemed to stop for a moment.  Even though he could barely take it, he kept fucking you through it until you were shaking so violently that he worried about your health.
“You feel so goddamn good when you come, princess,” he moaned softly.  “Tryin’ to milk my cock for all it’s worth, aren’t you?”
You laughed a little, sounding exhausted, but as he kept fucking you he could feel how sensitive you had become.  When he reached down to push your skirt back up to your waist after it had started to fall down a bit, he felt his own movements in your gut and it took so much not to lose his cool in that moment.  Instead, he pulled your upper body into his so that you could see in the mirror the way your lower stomach was bulging a bit each time he pushed in all the way.
"F-fuck, Bucky," you whimpered.
"Anybody ever been that deep inside you before?"
"No, not even close," you moaned.
"Am I hurting you?" he asked gently, kissing up and down your neck slowly to match his lazy, teasing thrusts.
"A little," you admitted, "but it feels good.  Don't stop."
He wasn’t so brutal with his thrusts, still deep but with a patient, measured pace.  It staved off his orgasm a bit longer, and it made you moan all slow and throaty which was not better or worse than the needy, high-pitched moans, but enjoyably different.  You didn’t sound as desperate anymore (probably because you’d already come), instead seeming relaxed and calm— if still arching your back and biting your lip nonetheless.
"I wanna come inside you," he whispered right against your ear; he could feel the way you shivered as a result.
"Please," you whimpered.
"Is that what you want?  Wanna be full of my come?"
"Yes," you sobbed, "yes, please Bucky I need it so bad!"
"Fuck, gonna fill you up so good, doll," he promised gruffly.  "Want me to make you mine, beautiful?"
He knew it was a risky thing to say, but his risks had paid off so far, and he wasn't in his most cautious mood.
"Already yours, Bucky," you sighed, "I'm yours, please come in me…"
It hit him suddenly when you said that, and harder than he expected.  He hadn't come like that in… he hadn't come like that ever.  He preferred not to think about the sudden, wavering moan he let out in that moment because he wondered if it sounded unsexy, but thankfully his mind was distracted by the overwhelming sensation of his softening, sensitive cock still within you.
He managed to maneuver you in the way he needed as he pulled out, leaning you back into him and holding your legs open to the mirror in front of you.
"Look in the mirror, sweetheart,” he instructed, his whisper a little labored as he was still catching his breath, “watch my come leak outta your pussy."
You seemed to be in awe of it, despite it being the obvious outcome of what had just happened.  To be fair, he was in awe of it in a sense, too; a thick, slow stream of sticky white come dripping down from your swollen hole and onto the floor… it was mesmerizing.
Your body was limp in his arms as he finally allowed you to rest, your eyes falling shut as you melted into his embrace.  He took a moment to untie your wrists, tossing the garment aside with an exhausted sigh.  “Bucky…” you mumbled sleepily, apparently just to say his name.
“Was that… sort of what you were hoping for today?” he asked softly, kissing your temple.
“And more,” you giggled.  “Oh my god, I… I don’t even know how to describe that… you’re so… fuck, I don’t know, my brain is totally jelly right now.”
“In a good way?”
“In the best way.”
He smiled, admiring your vacant-yet-pleased expression and feeling satisfied with his work.  You turned over to lay your head on his chest, and he gladly draped his arms around you in response.  Holding you like this felt so purely right, in a way so few things did to him.  Funny enough, even just having fucked you on the floor and already holding you afterwards right now, he felt nervous again that he would say something wrong.  You were a modern woman, after all, and maybe this was this ‘hook-up culture’ he kept hearing about.
“Was that true what you said, doll?” he asked gently, feeling you stir a little and slide a leg up to rest over his.  “Did you mean it when you said that you were mine?  Or was it just, you know, the heat of the moment…?”
You smiled a little, looking kind of embarrassed.  “Um, yeah, I meant that… I’m yours, if you want me to be.”
He didn’t feel as guilty for feeling so possessive over you now.  Clearly it was appreciated, in the right context.  And he was now at least 75% sure that this wasn’t a hook-up.  “Well, I’m yours, too,” he replied with a soft laugh, “whether you want me or not.”
“I want you,” you confirmed.
You laid in silence together for some unknowable amount of time, but it was a purely unawkward silence.  A peaceful silence, and one filled with possibilities, but not uncomfortable.  Maybe it was uncomfortable in the sense that the carpet, while still being very plushy and expensive, was still the floor and not as forgiving as a bed… but it was completely worth it.
Part of him feared to ruin the moment by speaking, but much more of him feared that you would slip out of his grasp if he didn’t say something.  "This may be the wrong time to ask this— or maybe just the wrong order to do this stuff in— but I wanted to ask if you'd like to join me for dinner sometime."
You laughed, but cuddled deeper into his chest.  "Um, yeah, that would be nice."
"I just hope I'll find something nice to wear," he grinned.
1K notes · View notes
jesslockwood · 3 years
Text
Photo Opportunities
Word Count: 2.7k
Pairing(s): Tom Holland x Actress!Reader
Warnings: FLUFF with a slightly (barely) suggestive sentence towards the end 
A/n: damn I can't write anything except actress reader? smh but this is for @londonspidey ‘s sit-com Writing challenge (ik I'm early lol) but I was so excited I wrote the whole thing in one go lmao the prompt is bolded!
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Calling yourself a fan was an understatement. You were obsessed with anything and everything marvel. And oddly enough, you could after today say you were in the club. It wasn’t a public fact yet, until later that day actually, at the Marvel panel at comic con that you were being announced as the actress for the character, Felica Hardy and no one else knew except for the people who cast you and your best friend who signed an NDA. You were technically still a known actress for your roles on television mainly as Thalia on the PJO Disney + series and a couple of still decently sized films. 
You were currently wrapping up signing autographs for fans of yours for today. Your team had planned it out so it wasn’t suspicious that you were at the con with a few of your castmates scattered doing other junkets and press so people wouldn’t guess who they were acting as the cast for new marvel projects. 
You had been planning to go meet your best friend, who wasn’t in the industry before getting a text that she bought you both a photo-op with someone and she wouldn’t tell you who. You couldn’t only assume it was a marvel actor that you would indeed, freak out. 
Y/b/n: btw I brought you a mask. I get the wig lol.
You: please tell me it doesn’t cover my full face. Also, how are we posing?
Y/b/n: I bought as many photo ops as I could so a lot of different ones, And if I tell you the poses it’ll spoil it.
You: is this with the money I pay you to be my assistant with? Lol fine I’m omw with security
Y/b/n: maybe… 
Y/b/n: and they’ll need more backup security for who we’re getting a photo op with than you do for your hellfire.
You roll your eyes before taking your stuff and exiting the booth, before heading out the backways with staff security and your detailed security for the day. You only had security because you wanted to explore the con when you weren’t needed.
Your best friend had also been your assistant for the con weekend, but you didn’t want her to be confined to you the whole three days so when she could, you would let her explore it, at least she could experience it as a fan, right?
When you made it to that part of the building, you wanted to wait in line with her, which your security didn’t agree to so she texted you when there were about five people ahead of her. She was one of the last in line, with you asking her to be kind, so others would get their chance to be first with whomever it was. 
When she texted you and your detailed exit, getting a few stares and others taking their phones out to either take photos or tweet, you wave at them before joining your best friend in line.
“Here,” she says before handing you none other than a black cat mask before she puts on a red wig. 
You glare at her slightly trying to not make a scene, before putting it on. 
“I’m assuming you're Mary Jane?” you laugh figuring out that it had to be someone from Spider-Man.
“How’d you- never mind.” She laughs with you.
She then explains how she’s going to pose for your five photo ops, joking in between how she should “get a raise for this”.
You catch sight of him before sucking in your breath. This was either going to go down amazingly or terribly, there was no in-between with you. 
“Excuse Me, are you Y/n Y/l/n?”
You turn around and are met by some fans who were standing in line behind you.
“I am! How’s your con going?” you ask politely to the two of them.
“It's going amazing! We love you as Thalia! Could we maybe get a picture? Only if it’s okay?”
“Of course! Thank you for supporting me!” your best friend grabs their phone to take the photo, before you take off the mask, and stand between the two fans, and your best friend snaps a few photos. 
“Thank you so much! And Are you fans of Tom?”
You start slowly walking back to catch up to the line. 
“Yeah, I love him as Spiderman, but I also enjoy his other roles. He's very talented, I'd love to work with him one day!” 
“Have you seen him in Uncharted?  We love Him as Nathan drake!”
“I have, he was amazing per usual! How are you two posing with him?”
They show you their innovative pose. You laugh and tell them it's great before you have to wish them goodbye before heading up for your turn for the photo op. 
“How do we want to pose- hang on, I recognize you!”
You freeze slightly before your friend mouths for you to flirt. You look down at the mask in your hand before getting into character and saying “Of course you do Spidey, I'm always causing you trouble.” you put on the mask and wink. 
He seems slightly stunned, laughing, feeling like he’s seen you somewhere, not only because he found you extremely gorgeous, while in his peripheral vision he sees his brother/ assistant, Harry waving like a madman on the side. 
Your friend directs you both through the poses, first, one both him putting “webs” onto you as she looks over his shoulder, the second one, both of you kissing his cheeks, the third, all jumping in the air in your best superhero poses, the fourth one she gets a photo op alone and the last one she gives to you,
“Seriously, who are you?”
“Your Wildest dreams, baby,” you say, taking off the mask. 
Your best friend yells “freestyle” from the sidelines before Tom dips you, gently, with you shocked, holding the mask out with your free arm and the photo captures that moment. 
 He gently helps you stand back up fully, not before you drop the mask.
“Nice moves Spider-Man.”
“Not so bad yourself, Black Cat.”
You laugh before, taking off with your best friend, well more her dragging you to the printing station leaving the mask behind. Tom picks it up before shoving it in his back pocket to hopefully give back if he could find you. 
-
`You were sitting in the green room, trending on Twitter before you were actually supposed to be trending on Twitter, and god knows where else.  
Someone had snuck a video of you and Tom, up till him dipping you, and a video of you interacting with the fans in the line.
Your Y/b/n was currently reading off some tweets out loud
“‘A kind queen we stan.’  I agree, I also agree with ‘Date her if you can't date me tom!!!’.
‘THALIA AND PETER PARKER??? My two fandoms have collided.’ same, same. Oo this one says, ‘if she ain’t playing black cat I will sue marvel.’ I'm dying at the reply ‘She needs to post the photos or I'll sue her!’. This one’s funny, ‘she could squash him like a bug in heels but he liked his queen like that.’.”
She pauses watching you texting.
“Y/n? Y/n?”
“What? Sorry I was only half listening. I was texting my publicist. She said to stay on the DL until tonight. 
“Well we should get food, you haven't eaten since this morning.”
“By the way, your show has shot to number one on Disney +. Also, you have like three times the followers you had before, probably cause you're trending on every platform, even Tumblr!”
“Wow you should just become my social media manager now.” you joke trying to ease the joy yet weirded out feeling in your stomach.
“Does that come with a raise? Because after today I've spent way too much of what I'm paid.” she jokes back.
-
After finishing his photo ops Tom asked Harry who she was and to find out. By the time he finished autographs for the day, Tom and Harry walked to the panel room in the back for announcements, one that included him for the new Avengers movie, while Harry gave him the rundown.
“So she’s an actress, she plays Thalia on Disney plus’ Percy Jackson series, and that's her most known project. The other girl with her is her assistant best friend, and now she's trending everywhere. People dug up some old photos of her being a marvel/Spider-Man fan, so there's that. And she's here at the con for the rest of the weekend. She's doing photo ops tomorrow at one, and yes she's single from what I gather since you were looking at her like this.” he makes a weird face before tom smacks him.
“And plus you have time in your schedule to get a photo op with her, that is if you eat lunch quickly.”
That gave Tom an idea. 
“Harry I’m going to need you to book me one, oh and help me find a Spider-Man costume!” He says, before leaving harry to do ‘assistant’ work. entering the green room for the announcements, watching them announce a new movie.
“We are so excited to announce to the Marvel Universe, and spider-verse-” that perked tom’s ears, “-directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood, and today we are announcing our amazing Miss Felicia Hardy, please give a warm welcome to the stage, Your Black Cat!”
You suddenly emerged in an aisle way, dressed in all black with a leather jacket, black ankle boots, and of course black sunglasses indoors.
The music is marvel music until it suddenly changes after a recorded laugh from you into “I can’t be tamed by Miley Cyrus”.
You start owning the music while saying hi and touching fans’ hands. You decide to take off your sunglasses and throwing them to a fan, for them to keep, before getting on stage.
“What a Performance from the one the only Y/n Y/l/n!”
You laugh, being met with the loudest applause you had heard all con before being handed a Mic. 
“Thank you but I'm a terrible dancer.” You Joke.
Tom was staring at the screen stunned. You had been the black cat all along. You were in the marvel universe and spidey one,  so he'd definitely be seeing more of you. The hard part is that you seemed so genuine when you talked, interacted with fans and was no doubt, stunning. 
“Better close your mouth or the flies will get in.” Tom turns around to find the voice of none other than his friend slash bully, Sebastian Stan, along with Anthony Mackie.
“Looks like the kid has a crush!” Anthony laughs, pointing to the screen you were on.
“I-I don’t! I don’t even know her!” Tom tries to come to his own defense, hopelessly.
“She’s got you whipped already don’t even deny it.” Harry comes in, joining the teasing of one, Tom Holland.
“Maybe we can invite her out for drinks tonight, then fanboy over here can meet her, and then probably scare her off!” Anthony mentions.
“You haven’t looked on the internet? They’ve already met.” Seb says, before showing Anthony twitter. 
Anthony stands there slightly shocked before bursting into laughter.
“Well, she’s damn well a keeper for Tom since she obviously likes him.”
A staff member peaks their head in the green room to tell Tom he’s up next.
“Well, that’s my cue to leave you two!”
On the other hand, you were on an adrenaline high from being on stage, and seeing all the fans. You knew tomorrow was going to be crazy, as you expected people to book your photo op left and right since the announcement. 
You had decided to decline an offer from your fellow marvel universe castmates, Sebastian Stan and Anthony Mackie, which they so graciously told you that whenever you’re free, the offer still stood. 
You had gotten to your hotel room seeing your phone blowing up on the social media apps for the second time that day. 
You responded to the important stuff, before heading to bed, knowing it was going to be hectic.
-
You had been right, it was absolutely insane, the number of people who showed up. You had fully booked all your time slots for photo ops. You had seen so many people dressed up in marvel cosplay, ranging from Loki to Ironman, even some people dressed up as your character, which was wildly insane to see.
You had been nearing the end of the line and had enjoyed every moment with the fans, and you couldn’t wait for your autographing session later that day, to truly get a chance to talk to the fans and connect with them and how they felt about you being their beloved Black Cat. 
After a few more photos, posing how they wanted, you see a fully dressed, head to toe, mask and all, Spider-Man. You had seen some spider-mans but most took off their masks to snap a picture. The person was the last in line. 
“Hey Black Cat.” The southern American accented voice tells you, seeming very familiar. 
“Hey, Spider, what poses do you have up your sleeve?” you ask kindly.
“I bought a few, Cat.” they laugh.
“Okay, You can do whatever a spider can right?” you pull out a line out of the comics jokingly.
“I can do flips if that’s what you’re asking.”
“Is that some kind of nerd pick-up line? Because it’s only kind of working.” you laugh. 
“I really can, but this is one.”
He gets down on one knee, holding a black cat mask instead of a ring. The photographer captures the shocked expression on your face.
“I- Don’t- What- Spider I-” 
“Ow My feelings…” Suddenly their voice changes into a British accent before they pull off the mask to reveal-
“Tom?”
“I guess you don’t have a spidey sense darling?” The photographer captures the moment without warning eating the moment up. 
You laugh at that. 
“I guess you found out my true identity Spider. And it’s nice to officially meet you, Tom.”
He laughs, just as nervous as you, he notices he has gotten closer to you and a strand of hair loosely is blowing in your face, so naturally, he pushes it behind your ear. Another snap of the camera can be heard. 
“NOW KISS!” a voice belonging to your best friend yells from the side, mid-eating a churro.
You both laugh really hard at that.
The both of you calm down, slowly leaning lost in the moment. The camera snaps again. You both look at the photographer weirded out, and they just shrug.
“Wait can you actually do a flip?” you ask, pulling away, not wanting prying eyes aka the photographer, to pry in your business. 
“I can, though I’d show you later, maybe in the greenroom?”
“That sounds naughty, but, sure.” you joke around. 
He laughs before, you both take off from the area going to grab the photos.
-
After spending most of the day together when you could, you get Tom’s number, before heading back to your hotel room. He texts you as soon as you get back. 
Spider: I had fun today, minus finding our assistants making out.
You: we should ‘snog’ too, it’ll gross them out ;)
You: I had fun too btw. Are you leaving tomorrow?
Spider: lol we should. And yeah an early flight, 6 am to be exact. Hbu?
You: Yeah me too... another day another dollar lol
Spider: ill miss you, Cat.
You: stop talking like we’ll never see each other again lol. As a matter of fact, come to my room, we’re watching a movie!
Spider: alright, I’ll order snacks. 
  You sigh smiling at your phone. You haven’t felt this giddy in a long time.
Your phone pings with a few Instagram notifications.
Tomholland2013 has started following you.
Tomholland2013 has tagged you in a photo.
You open Instagram to find the photo of him “proposing” to you posted.
“Ow, my leg, my- feelings...Welcome to the Universe, Cat.” the photo is captioned. You decide to post, the photo of him dipping you.
“So what do you say, Spider? Wanna help me pull off the Heist of the Heist of the Century?” you caption it, Before getting comfortable to watch a movie. 
What an opportunity ;)
Tags:
@lolooo22 @webmeupspiderdaddy @harryhollandsgirlfriend @spideyspeaches @greenorangevioletgrass @queenofthepouges @sheranatic111 @keithseabrook27
186 notes · View notes
hotchscvm · 3 years
Text
side to side
Warnings: swearing
Word count: 4.6k
Summary: In which you're performing your hit single in front of your fellow Avengers cast-mates and Chris can't seem to take his eyes off of you, catching the attention of a few cameras.
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"I'm here with the biggest pop-star of this generation, and she plays the very talented daughter of Tony Stark," the interviewer announced your name, smiling brightly at you as the camera panned your way. The hundreds of thousands of fans at home screaming when your face appeared. "How do you feel with all your nominations tonight?"
You smiled at the camera, giving a small wave at the people watching at home. "Honestly, I'm just glad I was even considered for these nominations. I mean, my girls Taylor, and Billie...they're amazing and I'm so happy to be put in the same category as them."
The lady grinned at you, her eyes twinkling. Or maybe it was her sparkly dress, the fabric nearly blinding you with how it shined under the lights. "If you ask me, you've got a pretty good chance at winning. I mean, your hit single—Side to Side—surpassed, like, a billion views in just a month? That's impressive."
"Well, I couldn't have done it without my fans." you replied, winking at the camera.
It was that time of the year again, where every artist, actor, and YouTuber hit the stage for the People's Choice Awards. With your crazy schedule, and the lack of sleep, you had planned to skip the award show until your friend, and co-star, Chris Evans—Captain America himself—convinced you otherwise. Even with the categories you've been nominated for had been more than a handful, but it was the begging and constant complaining from Chris that made you get off your tired ass and put it into a tight dress.
Your hit single, Side to Side, had everyone anticipated for your performance, unsure if you would be performing until the producers had put your name into the advertisement, making fans blow up Twitter. You were sure they had advertised your own song, along with your movie nominations, more than you ever had.
With nominations of Movie of the Year (Avengers: Infinity War), Action Movie of the Year (Avengers: Infinity War), Female Movie Star of the Year (Amara Stark), Female Artist of the Year, Song of the Year (Side to Side), Music Video of the Year (Into You), Beauty Influencer of the Year, and Social Celebrity of the Year, you had your hands full, which had only made your manager glow with happiness.
"Of course!" the interviewer agreed, glancing at the teleprompter filled with tiny words. "It was rumored that you wouldn't be coming, and a lot of us were upset, including me. Was that just a rumor or..."
"Actually, it's not that far off. I'm fucking—oh, shit—oh no!" you gasped, covering your mouth before anymore foul words could come out on live television. Instead of correcting you, the lady laughed, patting your arm softly. "Can't say that on tv. My bad. I, uh, with everything going on, I've been really tired, and I haven't slept in a week. I just wanted to chill, and accept my nominations at home but someone convinced me to come. So, if I say or do anything ridiculous tonight, I'm blaming him and my lack of sleep."
She nodded, clapping slowly. "I think that's fair. Is that someone, your onscreen father, RDJ?"
"He was one of the many people who unsuccessfully changed my mind, but no, it was Chris Evans. He promised me a day with his adorable dog, Dodger, and I couldn't refuse." you said, grinning at how his face had changed from hopeless to cocky as soon as he brought up Dodger.
"If I'm remembering this correctly, Chris Evans is that very handsome man you had kissed in your music video earlier this year. Into You, right? How do you feel kissing one of your co-stars outside of the movies your working on?"
"Technically, it was still acting, and I have kissed him before, so it wasn't awkward at all." you answered, glad Chris had accepted the role. Not only had it sky-rocketed the views and streams, but it made you feel better that it was his lips you were kissing and not a random model's. Yet, it didn't feel as professional as it had before when you pulled away after a take.
In scenes where you had to kiss the Boston actor, it was as professional as kicking Anthony Mackie's ass in Civil War but the kisses you shared on the set of the music video was definitely more personal. At the time, you had brushed it off as Chris being recently single, but now that you had broken up with Henry, you started questioning it again.
The interviewer nodded, squinting once more to read the words off the teleprompter before asking you another question that would certainly make the headlines. "I've been reading up on all those juicy tabloids and I've got one question that would satisfy my curiosity. Was Into You written about Henry Cavill or Tom Ellis?"
Usually, that type of question made you change the subject or altogether avoid the matter but this time, you wanted to joke about your failed engagement. "Henry, but Side to Side was written about Tom since I wanted more Grammy's considering the last album I put out won me a few. But this time, I'm gonna do it without an engagement."
The woman faked a laugh, surprised by the blunt honesty of your answer. "Um, you certainly do have a thing for British men, eh? I don't want to keep you up, but one more thing, for the fans. They've been dying to know if there's anything going on between you and Chris Evans. Any tea you wanna spill?"
"There's none to spill. We're just friends but it's always amusing scrolling through Twitter to find these edits of us." you replied, fidgeting slightly with the hem of your dress. Like usual, you had wondered if you should've worn something less extra but you had let your stylist play dress up with you for the past few months.
"Of course. Well, good luck to you, and I can't wait to see your performance." she said, giving you a little pat on the shoulders before announcing your name once again.
You got off the little platform, immediately taking Chris' awaiting hand, holding onto it as you climbed down the steps in your dangerous stilettos. Sighing, you leaned on him, trying to avoid the blinding camera flashes. "That was more exhausting than I thought it would be. You need to get me some caffeine after this is over because there's no way I'm making it to the after show without at least a few cans of Red Bull."
"So dramatic." Chris grinned, childishly sticking his tongue out as he guided you down the red carpet, stopping when told to take a picture. He let go of your hand, only to wrap it around your waist as you posed for the pictures. "Are you going to the after party?"
Posing seriously for a few seconds, you let your smile back on your face, facing the man beside you. "I was thinking about it, take a few photos, and head back home. Aren't you?"
"Actually, I was thinking we could ditch it and just hang out. You know, I did promise you some time with Dodger and you could waste a couple hours sleeping." he replied, his hand tightening ever so slightly on your waist. Flashing you a shit-eating smirk, he nudged you a little, pulling you away from the blinding flashes. "What do you say?"
You opened your mouth to answer only to be cut off by your manager, Alexandre coming out of nowhere to rip you away from Chris' arms. The latin man sighed in annoyance, glancing at his watch while giving you the look you've seen too many times before. "You're supposed to be in wardrobe right now. Get your ass backstage, and change before you miss your own performance. As for you, Mr. Evans, Megan wants your ass in a chair."
"I'll see you after." you say, getting dragged by your manager, winking at the actor before walking towards the changing area, the cameras following you until they couldn't enter the area.
Getting ready before a huge performance always calmed you down, maybe it was the smell of makeup or the feel of designer clothing made especially for you, but something about it made you feel comfortable and cozy. It was like a routine, especially with all the music videos and movies you had to film, the makeup, the hair.
They made you sit back, giving you your phone like a child while they made you even more sparkly than before, making sure you'd stand out against the flashing lights during the performance. A performance you made sure no one would ever forget. Smiling, you let your thoughts drift back to a certain super soldier as you were pampered.
"Welcome to the People's Choice Awards!"
The room darkened, the blue and pinks lights focusing on the stage as cameras all turned towards your shadow. Making sure your mic was set properly, tried to see past the darkness, to see a familiar face or two but with the headache coming on from the tight half-ponytail didn't help your case. The music started, the beat vibrating, you flipped your hair, and started.
"I've been there all night
I've been there all day (Nicki Minaj)
And boy, got me walkin' side to side (Let then hoes know)"
You rode the bike, belting out in your microphone, the attached headset limiting your movements a little. Gripping the handles, you made eye contact at the camera to your left, winking at it as you pedaled.
"I'm talkin' to ya
See you standing over there with your body
Feeling like I wanna rock with your body
And we don't gotta think 'bout nothin'
I'm comin' at ya
'Cause I know you got a bad reputation
Doesn't matter, 'cause you give me temptation
And we don't gotta think 'bout nothin'"
As you had sung, your eyes had adjusted to the bright spotlight focused on you, seeing a shadow of the one person you wanted to make you walk side to side. While you had answered the reporter's question, you hadn't been completely honest. Some of the lyrics had been written for the Bostonian; or to be more exact, your sex fantasies. With the chorus coming up, you let go of the handles, trying not to fall on your ass as you clapped your hands above your head, the claps matching the beat.
"These friends keep talkin' way too much
Say I should give you up
Can't hear them, no, 'cause I..."
Trying to be bold, you stared at him, his face in particular. The spotlight had blinded you so much that you couldn't see what his reaction was—or anyone's for that matter—but maybe it was a good thing. After all, his gaze always made you blush no matter how hard you tried not to. Pedaling faster, you threw your head back, hoping the motion would draw everyone's—Chris'—eyes on your chest.
"I've been here all night
I've been here all day
And boy, got me walkin' side to side
I've been here all night
I've been here all day
And boy, got me walkin' side to side"
With the help of a shirtless dancer, you got off your bike, taking the sheer jacket from him, and putting it on as you walked towards the front of the stage, moving your hips in to the beat of the song. Resting a hand on a shirtless dancer, you positioned yourself so you were grinding your ass against his crotch, throwing back an arm around his neck.
"Been tryna hide it
Baby, what's it gonna hurt if they don't know?
Makin' everybody think that we solo
Just as long as you know you got me
And boy, I got ya
'Cause tonight I'm making deal with the devil
And I know it's gonna get me in trouble
Just as long as you know you got me"
Sashaying to the little balance beam at the front of the stage, you made sure your hips swayed more than usual.
"These friends keep talkin' way too much
Say I should give you up
Can't hear them, no, 'cause I...
"I've been here all night
I've been here all day
And boy, got me walkin' side to side
I've been here all night
I've been here all day
And boy, got me walkin' side to side"
A few seconds after your note ended, you strike a pose on the balance beam, posing for a few more seconds while the cameras turned their attention away from you and onto the queen of rap herself: Nicki Minaj. The leather, pink bodysuit was identical to yours except for the color, her attitude fitting the badass outfit. She began to walk towards the stage, never breaking eye contact with the camera in front of her while the men pretending to work out to the choreo.
"Uh, yeah
This the new style with the fresh type of flow
Wrist icicle, ride dick bicycle
Come through yo, get you this type of blow
If you want a ménage, I got a tricycle
All these bitches' flows is my mini-me
Body smoking, so they call me Young Nicki Chimney
Rappers in they feelings 'cause they feelin' me
Uh, I-I give zero fucks and I got zero chill in me
Kissing me, copped the blue box that say Tiffany
Curry with the shot, just tell 'em to call me Stephanie
Gun pop, then I make my gum pop
I'm the queen of rap"
By the time she had finished her verse, you had caught up with the multitasking of both working out and singing, able to use your full singing capabilities for your high note. Nicki joined you on stage, hyping up the crowd while you built up for the high note, almost every camera pointed at you except for the one focused on capturing the headline-worthy expression slapped on Chris' face.
"These friends keep talkin' way too much
Say I should give em up
Can't hear them, no, 'cause I...
"I've been here all night (Been here all night, baby)
I've been here all day (Been here all night, baby)
And boy, got me walkin' side to side (Side to side)
I've been here all night (Been here all night, baby)
I've been here all day (Been here all day, baby) (Ooh, baby)
And boy, got me walkin' side to side (Side to side)"
Both you and Nicki motioned for the dancers to come towards you, curling your index finger at the sexy men. Singing the refrain, you both made them drop to their knees in front of you, as if they were kneeling at your command.
Just as the last note was sung, everyone clapped, the majority standing up, and more cheered. You noticed Chris hadn't done either, still sitting in his motionless while two camera men pointed their cameras at him. Your eyebrows furrowed, thankfully after the spotlight had shifted over to the miniature stage where the two hosts were babbling about nominations.
You were ushered off the stage along with the queen of rap herself, taking a few backstage photos before quickly returning back to your dressing room to change into your tailored dress. Your mind had wandered to why Chris hadn't applauded—not that he was obliged too, but a little something would've nice, especially with all the days put into the performance.
Taking a deep breath, you entered the big room, filled with your co-stars and other A-list celebrities. Little did you know you'd find out the reason to your question in the morning.
The loud ringtone woke you up, the sound obnoxious and borderline abuse to your ears. Beside you, Chris groaned, rolling onto his stomach, trying to muffle the sound of the call with his arm draped over his head. Putting him out his misery, you lazily reached for your phone, pressing the green button with dread, seeing the name across the screen.
"Hello—"
"You're trending on Twitter." Alexandre announced, happy with the results of the previous awards show. While it wasn't something as big as a Grammy or Oscar, judging by the amount of awards you had taken home, you became the people's favorite. "Hold on, lemme rephrase that. You and Chris are trending. Number one, world wide."
Glancing at the man sleeping beside you, you sat up, confused by the information given to you. You blamed Chris for making you stay up so late for your confusion. "Um, why? Did I accidentally have another nip slip?"
"What the hell?" Chris mumbled, rolling onto his back, his arm grazing your bare stomach. He immediately took it back, sitting up to look over your puzzled face. "What's going on?"
You shrugged, putting your phone on speaker so Alexandre could explain. Your manager chuckled, knowing you had stayed the night with Chris. He was just waiting for the day you'd finally have the guts to speak about the growing sexual tension. "Okay, Alex, explain."
"As much as I would love to go into full detail, I have other stuff to do so, I'm going to give you the basics. Chris' reaction to your performance went viral, people are shipping the both of you, and there's been thousands of memes made." Alexandre replied, a smile evident in his voice. "Anyways, I have to go. Got some interviews to schedule. Have fun getting your way out of this, Chris."
Your phone screen went back to the home screen, a picture of your family dog, Buster, smiling widely. Looking at Chris, you saw his eyes widened, his hands coming to rest of his face in embarrassment as he fell back onto the bed with a bounce, his head nearly hitting the headboard. "Oh, fuck."
"Are you going to show me what your face looked like or do I have to scroll through Twitter until I find it? Oh! Maybe they edited it in my performance." you thought out load, tapping on the YouTube app. You hadn't trusted yourself enough to log into your official account, knowing you'd probably make a mistake so you opted for having a secondary account where you could watch cat videos without the anxiety of posting something stupid.
Chris' hand snatched your phone away, tucking it in his pocket, the sweats he had slept in was somehow wrinkled, and his shirt damp from the warmth. "You wanna get some food? I'll cook some bacon but you'll have to make the pancakes 'cause the last time—"
"I wanna see your reaction." you whined, reaching across his stomach for your phone. Chris turned his body away from you, shielding the phone from your reach. "Chris!"
He waved your attempt away, rolling off the bed, his feet hitting the floor before you could fall back on the mattress.You poured, getting on all fours, crawling towards the edge. Chris took a step back, brows furrowing. "It's not important. Let's get you some food."
"Fine." you mumbled, an idea making you light up. Rolling off the bed, you glanced at his phone on the nightstand, exposed and easy to take. With quick reflexes, you grabbed his phone, rolling back on the bed until you reached the other side, making it impossible for him to reach for his phone back.
"Hey!" the Bostonian shouted, launching himself on the bed in attempt to get his phone back. He made a noise as you rushed out of your room, locking yourself in the nearby bathroom, laughing evilly when he threw himself at the door. He yelled out your name, his fist banging on the door. "I'm serious! Don't!"
Ignoring his begging, you opened his phone with your thumbprint. How ironic how much he didn't want you to look at his phone when he was the one who insisted you have the password to it. His arguments became louder as you opened up his Twitter, immediately heading to the trending section, seeing both your names at the number one spot.
"Damn, I look hot." you joked out loud, making Chris silent for a second before pleading for you not to continue. You smirked, scrolling through the tweets, trying to find his reaction. "Jesus Christ, what the hell happened to you? Did you fall on your face or something?"
Chris groaned, banging his head on the door in defeat as he heard your almost inaudible gasp, that quickly turned into little giggles. If he wasn't so embarrassed, he would've broken the door down to hold you in his arms. "Oh, no."
Bursting out into hard laughter, you fell into the large bathtub, hitting your head on the wall but you couldn't care less. The expression on his face during your performance had been borderline comical, the wide eyes, the jaw hanging open, the open hand resting on his chin while his eyes stayed strained on you the whole time, never wavering from your body, the sexy choreography making his jeans tight.
Cackling like the Wicked Witch of the West, tears ran down your cheeks, your stomach cramping from the maniacal laughter. Lifting yourself up from the tub, you stumbled to the door, your loud laugh ringing out towards the whole house. You let Chris in the bathroom, his phone quickly taken from your hand but it was too late. The blush on his cheeks wasn't going away anytime soon. You leaned against him, your head resting on his chest, while you panted out a question. "Why did you look like you were trying to attract flies in your mouth?"
Chris groaned again, covering his eyes with a hand while the other rested on your back. "You're not going to let me live this down, are you?"
"Oh, God, no." you giggled, wiping the tears away, beginning to calm down. Glancing up at him, you noticed everything above the shoulders was gleaming red, the embarrassment too unbearable for him. "Chris, you looked exactly like the first time we were forced to share a bed together."
"Yeah, you have that affect on me."
"You gonna tell me why you looked so ... shocked? Or do I have to search through Twitter and go with whatever fan theory makes the most sense?" you asked, unable to keep the smug grin off your face. Chris closed his eyes, wishing he hadn't made you come to the awards show in the first place. You raised an eyebrow, fingers itching towards his phone. "You know I'll do it, Evans."
The man raised his hands, taking them off of you as he paced around the bathroom, deciding if this embarrassing moment was the right time to finally confess. "It's just, you know, the dance was so ... sexual and hot that I probably wasn't the only one looking at you like that. You can't exactly blame me for being shocked, watching the girl I'm in love with—"
Chris stopped as you be watched the colors drain out of your face, immediately freezing when he realized what he had said. Both of you stared at each other, eyes wide, not moving a muscle, barely blinking; the atmosphere so tense neither of you were breathing, waiting for the other to talk. But neither of you wanted to go first, terrified.
It wasn't until you started to feel dizzy that you realized you hadn't been breathing, letting out a huge breath, trying to relax while Chris did the same, his hands shaking, a nervous tick he got whenever he was anxious. You got the courage to speak first.
"What?"
It was better than nothing.
Chris was so nervous he nearly ran out of the room. There wasn't some kind of handbook or script he could read, helping him tell one of his best friends how head over heels he was for her. So, he said what his brain was stewing. "What?"
"What—what?" you replied, unsure if he even said the L word, so lightheaded by the sudden confession.
The actor stilled, eyes widening even further, while his eyebrows shot up his forehead. "What?"
"What?"
"What?"
"Say what one more time, Evans, and I will make nothing but mac and cheese for the rest of your stay." you threatened softly, getting tired of not having an answer to your one-worded question.
Chris took a deep breath, hands trembling as he clasped them together, hoping to find the right words, hoping his inner thoughts would come out clear, giving you the answer you asked for. "I'm sorry. What do you want me to say?"
"What you were saying before. You know, before you looked like you saw a ghost and almost stopped breathing. I think that would be a good start." you replied, backing up to take a seat on the plush chair. Chris mirrored your actions, putting down the lid to the toilet before sitting down.
"This isn't the way I wanted you to find out." Chris whispered, his blue eyes trained on the emotions that flashed on your face. Your uncertainty of the situation didn't help his anxiety.
"Okay, um, were you going to tell me in the first place?" you asked, playing with the hem of your shirt—it had been a borrowed Patriots shirt from him. Looking back, you realized all the little things he'd done hadn't been because his platonic love for you. "Or were you just going to keep letting it be this way?"
Fidgeting with his hands, Chris peered through his eyelashes, seeing the hurt flash across your face before you quickly composed it. "Scott was hyping me up, trying to convince me to tell you before you got into another relationship. Do you know the real reason I broke up with Jenny? It hurt like hell when you announced you were engaged. Fuck, I couldn't even pretend to be happy because you were going to have the life I wanted with you, with someone who wasn't me. It was selfish and I got really mad at myself for being a dick."
"But—"
"And then the horrible, horrible relief I felt when you called off the engagement." Chris continued, his heart clenching. "Truth to be told, that was the day I found out I was in love with you, breaking things off with Jenny. Of course, I wanted to wait until you moved on, hoping to be the friend you went to but with my schedule, that was impossible. So, you seemed out comfort in Henry fucking Cavill."
"You're in love with me?" you whispered, hoping this wasn't some kind of cruel dream. If it was, you wouldn't mind staying.
The actor nodded, waiting for you to call him names and rush out. "Yes. You can leave or slap me or whatever you want to do but I love you."
You got up, running a hand through your hair. "Okay."
Chris' heart sank, wishing for any other kind of reaction, wishing you'd do something. Taking a deep breath, he got up. "Is this a goodbye?"
Frowning, you walked up to him, taking his face between with your hands, pressing your lips softly to his. You could feel his heart beat, the little organ beating so hard. You pulled away before he could recover from his shock, before he could kiss you back.
"Hello."
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louehvolution · 3 years
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I can't find any press about the afhf doc at all. Am I missing something? No reviews. Nothing. Am I looking in the wrong place cuz I don't see even a veeps report on numbers that attended the livestream? Have we been so caught up in content that we haven't noticed a complete media blackout on a (rare these days) festival?
Hi, anon. The numbers won't be out yet because tickets were still on sale until Sept 6th 5pm BST. But no, there is no press. Just an article on the fan site Celebmix, written by Simon Jones' blogger pal who also reports on Eleanor's influencer career and every other ex-1D. She got the exclusive of the livestream's record breaking numbers, so... chances are that if any are made public, it will be through her again.
I found it significant how Louis said in the documentary that he wanted to be one of the first to bring live music back with this festival. Since, romantic notions aside, that should have been an even greater reason for it to get attention in the press.
I would hope people will not lose sight of the present situation, once past the high of the concert. Because, whatever faith in the future we might have, to date, nothing has changed when it comes to how Louis is being mistreated and his solo music career held back.
The festival and streaming event were yet another display of Louis' brilliance, talent, passion, and determination as an artist, as a singer. But then, this has been evident in everything he has done since he started out on XF. And yet.
Just thinking of how his biggest press in 2020 was about Freddie, and for now in 2021 about a hypothetical, future management company. His IG went inactive for four months after he had the third biggest livestream of the year. How many times was he not seen for weeks this year except on Eleanor's account? The tabloid press he got in July didn't even include the word studio. Not to mention the situation with radio and playlisting.
And after watching the film are there still fans who think he would choose not to have press on it? Louis works hard and is proud of his music, and the work he does with other creatives, musicians, etc. Why would he not want it featured even on his platforms beyond one post on the date? Who can believe he is content being reduced to the personal life he wants to keep private? Can anyone still argue he does not want his music to be heard, does not want to be known as an artist? [And again, if it were a matter of focusing exclusively on his established fanbase, it still would not be like this.]
In the documentary Louis spoke about waiting for a break from bullshit and stress, for something to be easy, for once. In 2019 he expressed his frustration with the delay in releasing music due to XF. It upset him that interviewers in the US were not aware of a single before WMI. There is so much that makes it obvious the situation has not been and continues not to be, normal or good or fair - or one he is happy with either.
It's... :|
The film showcased him as the gifted, dedicated, genuine, gentle artist and individual he is. And if nothing else, I hope that will at least stick with fans - though I've been here too long to bet on it. But more people than his fanbase should have heard about it, should have [had] the chance to see it, and to know him.
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