#but it doesn't sit right to me the whole ANOTHER UNIVERSE theory
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The more I watch the "Two hours later" scene at the airport, the more I'm starting to believe it could actually be the actual continuation. What if Fyodor somehow did something to prevent Fukuchi to actually die? What if Fukuchi himself tricked Fukuzawa into thinking he was leaving everything in his hands? What if Fukuchi in the new outfit is the result of an ability? (Maybe Agatha's)
I've been reading that "Knight Akutagawa" could be one from another universe. Actually, I feel like it's just OUR Akutagawa, because Atsushi looks genuinely surprised to see him on the battlefield. Maybe he wasn't expecting him to be himself yet. The whole "Just the two of us?" "Do we need someone else?". I feel like Atsushi probably was expecting the "worst" from him, since he tried to attack him (again, as a vampire), and hearing THOSE WORDS gave him hope. He was genuinely relieved. Probably he thought Akutagawa wouldn't come back yet (or at all), but when he did, they fought TOGETHER again.
#bsd#bsd s5#bungo stray dogs#fukuchi ouchi#akutagawa ryuunosuke#atsushi nakajima#sskk#shin soukoku#i'm trying to be hopeful here#probably i'm just delulu#but it doesn't sit right to me the whole ANOTHER UNIVERSE theory#i know bsd it's actually unpredictable#but still
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Let me simplify reality shifting for you: a metaphor on shifting that will make shifting easier for you.
Hi, Hello, my Name is Evie and today I will calm your racing mind down and explain to you why shifting is not only real but also very plausible and NATURAL.
Where do we start? Shifting is not what many title as "a tik Tok trend among depressed teens who try to escape reality". It also is neither lucid dreaming, maladaptive daydreaming or just a wild imagination. It is exactly what it sounds like: you experience a different reality. Not a dream reality. A DIFFERENT one.
The whole concept of shifting is based on the multiverse theory. The theory, that every time you make a choice or decision the universe splits and creates a whole new parallel universe in which you chose the alternative option. That's very briefly explained but basically that's all you need to know.
When shifters start their journey they usually haven't really grasped yet, what a shift is. When they hear that they can shift to a reality in which they are a Hogwarts Student, or a MCU Character or a sparkly vampire in the twilight universe they feel almost overwhelmed (at least I know I did). You usually ask yourself questions like: How is this fictional Universe supposed to materialize in front of me? How am I supposed to just become a vastly different looking person out of nowhere? etc etc
Here is my little simplification for you:
So I work at a grocery store, and my job is ONLY the cash register. I live in Germany, so the workers can sit down for that. We have 5 Registers, but only at the very first one you have to stand, which I try to avoid as much as possible. Every time before I come in to work I think about which Register I want to be at that day, and then I decide (manifest) that for example today I want to be register 5. I arrive at work, and my coworker who assigns the registers tells me that today I was assigned to be the fifth register (as expected). So what happened? While I was walking to work, I made a manifestation, which shifted me to a reality in which I have the desired register. My desired reality.
I like to think of shifting as an art gallery. You need to realize that you are not your body. Or your mind. You are CONSCIOUSNESS. You are aware of your current reality, which is why you experience it. You, as a conscious being, are looking at the painting that is your current reality. When you decide to shift, you decide to just look at another painting at the gallery. This does not mean that the other paintings/realities do not exist or never existed right? You just don‘t pay attention to them right now, which is why you don‘t see them. But they are still there. You just aren't AWARE of them.
Now to give you an idea of how many paintings there are in this gallery. It's a lot. Think of every single name that exists in this reality. Now imagine how many those must be. This is only the number of realities that were created the second you were named your CR name. Slap on the same amount of names for the realities in which you were born as the opposite gender. There probably is a reality in which your name is lamp shade. So when you would shift to the lamp shade reality you basically just look away from your current reality painting and decide to look at the one where your name is lamp shade. We shift every single time we take a breath because we are looking away from the paintings in which we didn't, you see? You shift every single step you take because you aren't experiencing the realities in which you don‘t. You shift every time you manifest something and it happens, because manifestation is shifting, too.
Life is not built on coincidence. Nothing is coincidental. Everything is shifting. And just because you want to shift to a reality which is vastly different from the current one, it's not ANY HARDER. You are always just looking at different painting with your consciousness. Just because you are looking at a more complicated painting doesn't mean the looking away part is less simple. YOU just have to look at painting. You are not the one building the realities from scratch. Your job is to experience them, and to decide which one to look at.
so yeah. shifting is easy. it's simple, it's natural, it's all you have ever done in life. you can do it too, because you have already done it. multiple times. you are literally already present in your DR, you just aren't looking at the painting, yet. Do not doubt your power to look away. Everyone can, does, did and will keep on going to.
I hope this was helpful, and remember: Your thoughts are your reality. Shifting is only as hard or as easy as you make it out to be. Chose to look at the painting in which it's the easiest, and keep on looking at as many reality paintings as you want.
a lot of love,
Evie <3
#law of assumption#law of manifestation#law of attraction#loa#manifesting#manifestation#self concept#current reality#desired reality#desired life#reality shift#reality shifting#shifting realities#shifting#shifting community#spiritualgrowth#spirituality#spiritual vibrations#spiritual community#spiritualawakening#spiritualjourney#motivation#success#shifting motivation
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50% Crowley theory 50% Crowley Angst
Let's talk Crowley and religious trauma because I just got done rewatching s2, this time with the company of my mother (the absolute icon that she is).
Side note, this is 50% theory and 50% character speculation, so enjoy this behemoth of a post.
After we finished e6, my mom and I had a lovely little discussion about the roles of both the Metronome (yes, she actually called him this) and God. Much of the discussion revolved around wether or not God was a malicious/cruel force in the Good Omens universe. While my mom had made the argument that yes, God in this universe is not a sympathetic character, I ended up arguing the opposite.
And I can easily see how she would come to that conclusion. Heaven, after all, has been shown to be pretty morally dubious. But that's just the thing. Heaven and God are two completely separate entities. And that's a really, really, really important distinction (especially for Crowley's character). Crowley hates Heaven, yeah, but does he hate God? I would make the case that he doesn't. In fact, I think he might actually still love Her.
In s1 he literally talks to God about his fall. Obviously, he doesn't get any sort of reply, but he doesn't seem angry here in the slightest. He's just sad. Sad and literally begging God not to destroy humanity. That does not seem like hate to me. And if he resented God for his Fall, why would he still be talking with Her? Why would he be trying to reason with Her? But let's keep going. In season 2 when he sees God talking to Job, I don't get any anger here either. Unlike the scene in s1, I don't get sadness either. I get wonder, and just a hint of envy. He wants to be able to ask these big questions, to speak with God even if he doesn't get a proper answer. That means something to him.
But why would he still love God if She cast him out? Well, I actually don't think She was the one to do it. I think it was the Metronome (yes, I'm calling him that until the end of time). I mean, Crowley recognizes him immediately and Metronome over here recognizes him right back. And even more that that, the Metronome was the one at Gabriel's trial, not God herself. If the trial of the Supreme Archangel Gabriel doesn't warrant the appearance of God, why would Crowley's Fall? Crowley got in trouble for asking God too many questions. And what happened when Aziraphale tried asking questions in s1? He spoke with the Metronome. It's pretty reasonable to assume the same thing happened to Crowley.
So what does this do for his character? Well, it gives some additional context to his conversation with Aziraphale, especially that second "tell me you didn't". Because I get some genuine fear from David Tennant's performance in that moment, and this would definitely explain why. It also gives him some delicious internal conflict and adds to his whole wanting-to-be-a-good-person-but-that-puts-him-in-immortal-danger thing. Because loving God would be like, the ultimate demon no-no. Loving in general is pretty unacceptable, but loving God???? And that would just make his isolation among the demons that much more significant. Of course he became so set on helping Aziraphale. Aziraphale was (is?) all he had (has?) in so many ways, this is just another one of them. And adding onto all of that, knowing that a God, his God, would sit there and allow him to feel all these immensely painful feelings and then not even finding it in himself to be hateful or angry at Her...Just hateful of the systems build around Her 'ineffable plan'...There's something deeply compelling and deeply human about that, which I find very relatable.
#i just love this for the angst honestly#gotta get in my daily dose of good omens pain#oh crowley you poor thing#someone give him a hug#ineffable husbands#ineffable idiots#ineffable divorce#crowley#aziraphale#good omens#good omens season 2#good omens theory
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Thoughts on the ryuzaki theory?
I assume you are talking about the Ryuzaki persona theory, and I'll be honest, I found this theory out by reading people being mad at it (rightfully so) but I've never read a full post explaining it, so I don't know much about it. I googled it but can't even find the source.
All I know, and correct me if it's not this theory, is that the faceless/first!L is the "true" L while how he acts around the task force is just a "caricature" of himself/just an act. And to me, it just seems stupid to believe that.
From an in-universe prospective, considering the time he spends around the task force, it's quite improbable that he can keep up an act like that for that long, but also, I don't understand why people think that some traits are mutually exclusive - you can act in a way in a certain setting and another way in another. That's just human nature. Besides, Aiber and Wendy don't act weirded out by his behaviour when they meet again, so you have to believe that he informed them, but even so, I think his actions should still cause a reaction of surprise in them, which would be evident, but it doesn't happen. Also, I don't understand the reason why he should act like that. I don't know what the theory says he would gain by doing this, because to be honest, it caused a bit of doubt in the task force, which goes against his (very evident) need for trust. Even if I hypothesize that he needed it so they would accept his most radical decisions regarding the case, it still doesn't make sense, because he decides to put cameras inside Soichiro's house right in the beginning, when it's not like they really trusted him. They don't trust him throughout the whole investigation anyway, so...
We know that Ohba and Obata didn't really have a clear image of how L should be when they started to publish the story, so that's the reason the two look/act slightly different.
So, yeah, this is my opinion on what I know.
[Also, at the beginning of mazzaroth (my wammy's fic), he's 8/almost 9, and I've already included some of his traits - walking barefoot, eating a lot of sweets, holding stuff between his index and thumb, his very intensive gaze, his sitting position (this is all I remember for now) & I will eventually add his posture being slightly curved as he grows older - so hopefully, this makes my stance clear lol]
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I Knew I’d Like You
(AKA Sam and Daniel, season 1)
@fighting-naturalist you asked for the essay, here it starts
She thought he was dead, everyone did (except for Jack's team and well, Hammond (see 1969)). But she knew how important he was to the program, to her work. But she never knew how close they could be.
When they arrived on Abydos again, she was instantly geeking. And Daniel, for maybe the first time ever, was the one left confused and speechless. But then he gave her the one answer she hadn't found in two years, in a field he "doesn't pretend to know anything about." Suddenly, she had a partner in crime. Another doctor in a sea of hardcore military men. Then she’s pulling him out of the line of fire and doing her best to keep him comfortable when he comes to. They come through the gate together, synchronised in their defence of his people. They instantly bonded over nerd behaviour, but it quickly went deeper. “You can’t just stay awake forever.” She was understanding of his position but caring, and honestly I don’t know if Jack would’ve got him to go to bed (He might have, but it probably would’ve been more of a fight. At that point anyway.) There’s other little moments like Daniel being the one to come get her in the tent when she’s singled out in emancipation.
Jack, under the influence of the touched virus mind you, sees Daniel’s care for Sam as something more, even though Daniel was insistent on Sam being a friend he cared about. (Although Danny boy was giving Jack some looks in that scene but he’s just like that).
Onto Thor’s Hammer. They capture the Goa’uld. She knows what Daniel’s thinking about doing with the rest. She tries to stop him. She almost gets through to him, not wanting him to tarnish his character. But he turns around, shooting the tank. And she just falls silent, carefully taking the weapon away. She knows exactly why he did it, as unwarranted as it was in her mind. She knows she couldn’t have stopped him, not really. And she never judges him for it, never brings it up again.
Fire and Water. They all think he’s dead, but Sam has the most immediate difficulty. She’s the one in his diary, personal effects that everyone else was avoiding. She was the one that went forth with the hypnotism, not dismissing it in hopes of answers. Then she’s immediately guilty when she realizes they left him behind. Then the way she finds him in Hathor, brainwashed and defenceless, she can only watch in pain and walk away, there’s a mission to complete.
Jump to singularity, very well thee Sam & Daniel moment of the season. She’s the most attached to Cassandra, but he’s second in line. He’s sitting outside the girl’s room, where Sam also is, almost as a guard. He assures Sam she doesn’t have to do it alone. He’s right there in her corner. She’s distraught, saying she shouldn’t be so attached. She’s become so used to having him around (For what, maybe eight months? Maximum?) That she’s lost full sight of the fact that he’s not actually military. (Not to mention the look on his face in that scene geez Danny do you understand platonics?) And when she’s in the General’s office giving her stance on Cassandra’s situation, Daniel’s right there in the doorway, backing her up. Daniel does have every reason to be there, he knows what Cassie is going through, he was an orphan too. But it’s just as much about Sam to me, he’s been there the whole episode, this was no different.
Obviously in the alternate reality Daniel is thrown to, Sam is with Jack, they’re engaged. But she’s the one that jumps on board with Daniel’s theories, trusting him, sympathising. She’s mixed right into the charge that eventually gets him home. And the Sam of our reality is the same, the first to acknowledge the possibility that he actually did experience an alternate universe.
Couple this all with the fact that Daniel has zero definition of personal space (with anyone but especially with Sam) and the seeds were planted for their bond from the get go. The friendship lines were always blurry, not just with them. Though Daniel wasn’t about to get into anything consensual until after his wife was gone for good, he found an undeniable beautiful relationship with Sam, starting mere seconds after they met.
#stargate sg1#sg1#sam carter#daniel jackson#i love their canon bond but also would love it to be explored further#samdaniel analysis#otp: i knew i'd like you
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So I’m finally sitting down and watching Season 2 of Warrior Nun (I’ve been super sick for the last two weeks but I’ve let it play in the living room over a dozen times for the views) but first I wanted to rewatch Season 1.
Season 1 rewatch thoughts below the cut! Season 2’s coming soon!
First thought: fucking hate Mother Francis or whatever her name is, like, as a disabled person myself learning what she’d done to Ava and the other kids at the orphanage was rough.
On that note though, I do want to give WN props for its surprisingly good representation when it comes to Ava’s disability. Maybe a little-known fact outside of disabled communities, but narratives like Ava’s where the person is magically cured by something are normally pretty unpopular (with us) and offensively written.
But the way it's handled is actually really good! Sure, Ava can magically walk and use her arms again, but we see repeatedly that she struggles with pretty basic (for an able-bodied person) things because she was never in a position to learn them. And even more impressive is how they managed to write Ava’s selfish/thoughtless behavior without demonizing her for it and acknowledging that it’s a result of trauma and something that needs to be worked on... like lots if things you have to work on after a long-term traumatic experience.
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I suddenly really want to see Ava and Shannon interact. Like, I know it's impossible on account of Shannon being dead, but I’m very curious what their interactions would look like.
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For some reason, I don't remember the OCS having this much screentime during the earlier episodes... which is good because tbh I really don't vibe with JC’s Drifter group... which is on purpose, we as the audience are drawn into Ava’s narrative and her thoughts and desires and outside of having some uh... Hormonal Feelings towards JC, she doesn't really care about the Drifters outside of having a good time, unlike how she eventually comes to feel out the OCS.
Which, on that note, maybe I’m noticing/paying more attention now because I’ve seen the back half of the season and have come to care about them in retrospect.
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Me Vibrating In My Seat: Look! This random tidbit supports my “Ava is the WN universe’s Second Coming of Christ” theory!
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Okay, another thing I don't think I’ve picked up before was that the flying levitating is a power that’s unique to Ava and that different Warrior Nuns have different “bonus powers” so to speak...
I wonder if, based on Lilith’s reaction during the scene, another one of Ava’s powers is either like... ridiculously high pain tolerance or super rapid healing to the point her brain doesn't register the pain from something as simple as getting hit by a stick?
Because Lilith and Mother Superion both seemed to think it should hurt and I feel like out of everyone they’d know what “standard” Halo-Bearer powers should look like best.
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Ugh Lilith... what sucks is knowing where her character arc is going and this whole “hunting down Ava” thing feels (pardon the pun) saintly in comparison to where she’s going.
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The Mary/Ava episode is probably my favorite episode of Season 1. Just, peek comedy with a mix of feels and lore, aka: perfection.
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Camila showing up to a knife fight with an automatic machine gun (after Ava was just shot with an arrow) is also peek comedy. “I really hope I got God’s message right.” Which I only just realized is a call back to the last conversation with Beatrice.
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Also just... knowing that Ava’s biggest fear is being alone, and like... the joy radiating off of her when Mary, Beatrice, and Camila are taking care of her while she’s injured hurts. Like... after the way Mother Bitch treated her for being quadriplegic, it was such a surprising experience to be taken care of so tenderly by people she’d only known for like... a week? After spending 12 years being told she was nothing but a burden by her own caretaker. No wonder she’s willing to die for them down the line.
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Also, forgot to say anything during the episode, but I love how the two women we’ve kind of seen as primary antagonists up to this point (Jillian and Mother Superion) are both developed into sympathetic characters (and future allies) during the same episode, which is also right around the time Father Vincent starts seeming a little sus (even though it’s hard to tell because everyone else is even more sus).
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Ah... the scene that started it all. I do love Beatrice’s coming out scene. It’s so beautifully done and I love Ava’s reaction, not just as someone who ships them. Like... Ava struggles a bit with empathy, when JC told her about his mom she didn't really seem to care all that much, but when Beatrice is opening up about her own messed up history and is clearly upset, you can almost see the switch getting flipped in Ava’s mind and she becomes genuinely serious and concerned for one of the first times in the show...
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I love heists!
That’s it. That’s the comment.
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The reveal that the main characters have been unknowingly aiding the bad guys the whole time is just... perfection.
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AAAND THERE’S THE CLIFFHANGER! Can’t say I’m upset I won’t have to wait another two years to watch the next episode, lol.
#Warrior Nun#Avatrice#Not tagging all the characters for this one#No need to clutter the tags.#I don't know why I put a period at the end of that but I’m to lazy to change it
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05.09.23
okay so... deep breath...
im barely hanging on you guys. like. i am under so much stress.
so basically i had two exams to retake: probability and functional analysis. and it's the only ones i have left to complete my degree. but, here's the fun little twist! if i don't pass im out! i only have one chance to pass them. and if i don't, thats 4 years of studying down the drain. fun fun fun!!!!!
so the first exam was on the 28th and it was really hard. i studied a lot, made flashcards and everything. and it was like impossibly hard. the thing is, this was a yearly class, so the overall grade is the average of two semesters. i got a 4.5 for the 2nd semester, so i only need 3.25 to pass the year. but the exam was so hard idek if i got 3.25... the prof said that if we only fill out the theory questions, that's a 4. the theory questions counted up to 8 points, so like if i get 8 points overall, that's a pass. but guys... im so scared...
so ive been freaking out a lot. and taking anxiety meds. and when i think about this exam i feel this FEAR in all caps. like. it's so bad. i can't sleep, i can't do anything, my skin is breaking out, it's hell.
then the second exam was on the 4th, so yesterday. and i was this close to losing it like the pressure was too much to handle. i burst out crying right before the exam but i managed to calm down. and tbh i think i'll pass this one. it was also quite difficult but i think i did okay. but still. the FEAR...
like i can't even describe it to you guys. i don't know if i'll even be able to have the courage to open my grades when they arrive. like i went on the university portal yesterday and my hands started shaking and i like had to crouch down bc my whole body became so weak i couldn't stand. it was terrifying.
so yeah... im really not having a good time right now.
in other news, okay, so i wanted to find a video in my whatsapp messages. so i went to "media" and started scrolling and i stumbled upon some things B and i had sent to each other back in the day. and i saw his new profile picture and.... he's in budva.
and okay first of all call me fucking geoguesser. bc the picture is just a selfie of him standing in front of a mountain. and i knew it was budva just from the shape of the mountain alone. and his head in blocking most of the mountain too but i still knew that it was budva right away.
then out of curiosity i checked his telegram profile picture and it's him in the old town sitting on a boulder like the thinker. again, i knew it was budva right away lol. and it's funny bc i saw that he deleted all of our telegram messages. all of them! i wonder when he did it. and why.
and also it hurt bc budva is MINE. like when lucien went to budva i was super jealous. but like whatever, it's a touristy destination, it doesn't matter. but it's strange that B went there. i mean we have so many memories there together. it's like if i went to sarajevo all of a sudden. and i wonder who he went with. his friend from belgrade? his new gonzesse lol? anyway, yeah.
another weird thing is that okay my zurich friend was in town and he asked to hang out and i had to decline bc i was studying for the exam. and then i saw on instagram that he posted this one song to his story. and the story itself was weird, my oxford bestie sent it to me like "what is this? why is he so weird?". it was basically like a blurry photo of a dimly lit street but like whatever artsy.
but yeah, it gave me whiplash because i had posted this exact song to my story exactly a year ago. day for day. like isn't that a weird coincidence.
and usually you know how im very obsessive especially when it comes to music. like if i like a song i listed to it on repeat non stop for days. and because of that a lot of the music i listen to is linked to a certain period of my life. so the song my zurich friend posted is the song of me breaking up with B. that's why it stood out to me so much. it's so strange...
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"idk if anyone watched that “Ryan Murphy is problematic” video on youtube but tell me I’m not the only one who found it an unfair and lacking in nuance take" can you expand on your problems with that video? 🤔
Okay so it's a half an hour video, available here, so I won't touch on every single point they bring up. From the get-go, my problem is that the vast majority of the talking points are based on nothing but conjecture and what Ryan Murphy is supposedly like as a producer but also more so as a person. I get that producers work with and are in charge of people but I find it inherently, hmm, well, let's repurpose the word "problematic" to try and draw conclusions about people based on their work, rather than just examining their work. I'm all for criticizing Ryan Murphy's work, and yeah sometimes we speculate what personal agendas or even vendettas could have been influencing said work, but this whole video simply doesn't justify its existence to me. There's simultaneously an aversion to drawing any sort of conclusion, since it is just a summary of rumours and allegations, but also a clear judgement in the way these rumours are presented.
Like I said I don't wanna touch on everything but just a few moments in particular to get a sense of what I mean:
The two sections on RM "hating" Chris Colfer and Dianna Agron. Sometimes I think the Glee fandom gets so immersed in its own mythology it forgets that so many of these universally agreed-upon truths are just rumours perpetuated by tabloids and tiktok teenagers. I've had an ask about that Rolling Stone interview sit in my inbox for a while so maybe one day I'll dissect the Dianna of it all, but the way this video uses pure conjecture to speculate even further just creates more and more unsubstantiated claims. The dots connected between Ryan's tweet about "Quinn" filming in Europe and the New Normal stuff is like, come on, where do we draw the conspiracy theory lines. And as another example of trying to substantiate conjecture with more conjecture, the Ashley Fink rumours coupled with the Lea Michele ones. I won't get into it here, it's in the video presented in such a bizarre way, imo. "Here's this malicious rumour, I know we have to take it with a grain of salt so here's another rumour to back it up." That's not how it works. But it is the nature of videos like this that they can't bring anything new because we don't have the facts, so they just regurgitate decade-old rumours and try to pass judgement on people we do not and never will know. Adding "...allegedly!" at the end of claims does not make the framing of this any better.
The biphobia section, which is so emblematic of Gleeks being ultra ready to blame everything wrong with Glee on Ryan Muprhy - and sometimes give him all the credit, too, which just does not work on any TV show, let alone one with three showrunners. Now, we won't get into the actual biphobia of it all because I'm sure I've spoken about it somewhere and I don't think whether Ryan Murphy is biphobic is the point. The point is that you can look at the text, Glee, and criticise its approach towards bisexuality and you'd be right to do so. But you can't just imply or outright say that this one writer out of three main ones, or later one of many, is responsible for it all, much less say that it reflects his personal beliefs. It's also wild to speculate on whether Brittana would have happened if it was only up to Ryan; credit Brad Falchuk (and Naya) by all means but it's just really running with conjecture to imply that Ryan himself never would have made Brittany bi. We just don't know "what if" and what's the point in trying to say stuff like "Ryan agreed, but WHAT IF Brad wasn't there" like come on, how is that a valid claim against Ryan Murphy. I certainly don't think it is in the way it's presented. Again, Glee's biphobia is fucked up. Again, I actually do have beef with RM regarding biphobia in particular. But this is all presented in such a tabloidy gotcha way and that doesn't sit well with me.
In general it's a lot of "maybe this doesn't mean, a grain of salt, BUT have you considered this other rumour and how it all adds up?" And no, I don't think it does and I don't like the way all of this is framed, where you're encouraged to make of it what you will but there's a very clear direction in which you're being steered. Which makes sentences like "I do normally try not to bring up things that are purely speculation" w i l d because, to me, so many of these are. Based on a kernel of truth or twisted from something factual, sure, but twisted nonetheless and the conclusions drawn can in no way be definitive. Just because these are all widespread rumours that doesn't make them not rumours.
There are other things like trying to use Naya's dad's tweets as a source and a, idk, gotcha moment against Ryan Murphy. "Still heavily questioned whether or not that's true," they say about Ryan's statement, but that short section becomes emblematic of the whole approach. Take Ryan's statements and defense with a heavy dose of skepticism but imply that claims against him are somehow more substantial. I just don't like the bias, the lack of true nuance, the lack of a point, really. And again blaming everything that happened on Glee, even stuff he didn't actually write on Ryan Murphy is just grasping at every possible straw to round out this video on him being "problematic". Still hate that word.
To be perfectly clear, this is not me coming at the person who made this video, I'm sure they're lovely and are just doing their thing on youtube. I just don't find it any more substantial than a buzzfeed article listing all the Glee bts rumours relating to Ryan Murphy. (I didn't touch on Dahmer simply because I can't and don't care to, plus most of the video is Glee-related anyway.)
#anon#glee asks#ryan murphy#glee production#kinda look i need a tag for things like this the nonglee one has been taken over#there were just so many bits in this video where i had to go#'no actually that's not how it works#that's pure conjecture that's bs you don't know that' etc etc#but that's all i wanted to sort of rant about that#and if anything it's against the whole glee gossip machine and the way in which we feel entitled to cast and creators#not against this channel and this video in particular#okay well i do have more to say on the topic of how everyone still looooves the glee drama and to bathe in it#and how that's the exact reason we need ATWYRM because god was that two parter with rm such a breath of fresh air
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Rough Path to Memory Square (Doctor Strange x Reader [Earth-838])
Words: 6327 (chapters 19-21)
Summary:
You - Earth-838 Sorcerer Supreme's apprentice, now living under Mordo's wing, which you don't like.
Former Supreme Strange's lover and a gifted sorceress, drowning in her own despair, still not over Strange's death.
What happens when two intruders - America Chavez and Stephen Strange, visit your universe? Will you help them? Will you manage to convince the Illuminati that Stephen is not the real threat, but dream walking Wanda is?
Will your own feeling get in the way? Will you open your heart to Doctor Strange again?
Find my other accounts on ao3 and wattpad under the same name <3
ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1rSoldierSince2012
wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/user/1rsoldierSince2012
Chapter 19: The Impulse Theory
An early morning breeze hits your face, and you take a deep breath. Stephen walks out of the portal and goes toward the library building.
"Wong said he's gonna be there. I also have a matter to attend, so I guess we're walking together." he says, forcing himself to not divert his eyes from you.
"Oh, good." you answer, looking at the ground. Lonely leaves surf around your feet, chasing each other. You feel indescribable loneliness in your heart, knowing that these are last moments with people you've bonded so quickly.
Strange opens doors for you, and you exchange glances, shy smiles. Stepping into the library, you feel like you're back at home, even the smell of old books and jasmine tea is the same. Wong is already sitting at the small table, waiting for you.
"Miss Y/l/n! Good morning!" he says, getting up.
"Master Wong," you bow, "hello."
"Please, take a seat. Tea?"
"Oh, yes, thank you." you smile, grateful that he agreed to talk to you.
"So, Strange told me that you wanted to talk to me about something." he begins, pouring the tea from the teapot.
"Yes. I uh. I wanted to talk about America."
"Miss Chavez?"
"Yes, yes. I have sort of a theory that I wanted to clear up with you." in the corner of your eye you see Strange disappearing somewhere in the bookshelves. It's obvious that he's going to eavesdrop on you.
"Well, I hope I can help, what's the matter?" Wong asks, now interested.
"Well, in my universe, the heroes, or the organization called Illuminati knew quite a lot about the incursions. Or at least they thought they did. So uh, in short, an incursion is when two universes begin colliding, or when the stronger one destroys the other, and that happens when someone who is not supposed to be in that universe is there. In this case, me. I can't stay here for too long because your world will begin to fall apart. And mine probably too. But it's not about me or Stephen or-" you take a breath, wanting to say everything as fast as you can. "I've been thinking. Since America has powers to travel the multiverse, does she affect the universes she comes to? As far as I know, she's from another universe, so can she cause an incursion?"
Wong sits there for a moment without saying anything, and then quite loudly begins, "I believe Miss Chavez told us that she doesn't dream, thus menacing that she hasn't found a version or herself, or it simply doesn't exist, right Strange?"
You turn around and see Stephen emerging from the shadows with a book in his hands. Of course, he's been listening.
"Yes. Her being an only person in the whole multiverse, probably doesn't trigger incursion. Well, since there is no possibility for her to meet another her on the street." Stephen says, pretending to search for a certain page in the book.
"Oh, now that changes a lot. And you're now going to teach her Mystic Arts, right?"
"Yes. As much as she wants. Her controlling her multiverse traveling powers is not enough, she has to understand them and understand herself." Wong answers.
You take a sip of tea, feeling all the tension leave your body. "Well, now that one problem is solved, onto another." you say, not looking at Stephen but feeling his eyes on you. "How often does the Third Eye open?"
Wong puts his cup on the table and thinks for a moment. "You have any particular cases in mind?"
"Well, in the universe which was almost destroyed by the incursion, we met a version of Strange. And he had a Third Eye. I know that it's not a very common phenomenon, but maybe you, as the Sorcerer Supreme, know more about it?"
"No, I'm sorry, y/n, I think I know just as much as you, or any sorcerer who has finished studies. Was it the version of Strange who used the Darkhold?"
"Yes." you and Strange answer together.
"Maybe the Darkhold causes this to happen. Although I've never seen Wanda have one on her forehead." Wong frowns, recalling the terrible hours he had to spend with Scarlet Witch.
"But Wanda didn't study anything apart from the Darkhold, yeah? At least in my universe, Wanda confessed that she had never studied magic in her life. She was... Sort of born with the powers." you say, unsure about yourself and the things your Wanda has said.
"So you think that not knowing about the world of magic is what kept her away from getting the Third Eye?" Stephen says, closing the book loudly. Wong only with his eyes shoots him a warning.
"I'm not saying exactly that. She hasn't learned about the secrets we, sorcerers, have, so maybe she doesn't know about the opening of the Eye? I've read the Darkhold, and never seen anything about it."
Wong raises his eyebrows but doesn't comment on your last sentence. He just looks at both, you and Strange, and asks suspiciously. "Why are you suddenly so interested in it? Did something happen?"
"Yes" you say as Stephen says "No."
"So it did happen. Tell me." Wong takes a sip of the tea and motions for Strange to sit down as well.
"I know it's not my place to do shit now, but I've had enough experience with Doctor Strange to know that he's not telling you about what happened any time soon." you say, feeling Strange's eyes drilling holes into your head.
"His eye opened this morning."
"How do you know?" Wong asks, already guessing your answer.
"I've seen it. It felt like it looked right at me, maybe even through me. Like I did something bad." you say looking at the cup in your hands...
"I'm not going to question why you and Strange were together," Wong murmurs, and you feel your cheeks getting hotter with every second. Stephen uncomfortably shifts in the chair next to you. "But you think that it has something to do with the use of Darkhold? What if it's connected with the Eye of Agamotto?" he points at the artifact hanging on Strange's neck.
"He told me the same. But what if it's all connected? What if the bearer of the Eye of Agamotto is capable of opening his Third Eye after using the Darkhold? What if that book was some kind of trigger?" you try to sort everything in your mind, so that words leaving your mouth would make at least a little sense.
"We can only guess, y/n. Although now that you told me, I think me and Strange can look for answers in the ancient books. Now that I'm aware that some myths are actually true, I think I'm not going to be so skeptical about some things." Wong smiles a bit.
"I think America will get up soon." you say sadly, looking for a clock somewhere.
"Yes, I think I'll come to New York with you." Wong says, looking at Strange, who sits there, head turned down.
"Good. Thank you for the tea and warm welcome, Master Wong." you get up and nod to him.
"We still have a spare half an hour." Stephen says, not moving an inch from his chair. Wong stands up and leaves the two of you in an awkward silence. You sit back and look at Stephen.
"I know it was a total dick move, but I think you know yourself too well." you begin before Strange has a chance.
"Totally a dick move." he huffs a laugh, confirming that he's not mad.
"I'm going to miss you, Stephen." you say more to yourself than the man beside you. He raises his head and looks at you with an unreadable expression.
"What if I... What if you..." he stops mid-sentence.
"What?" you whisper.
"What if we visited each other sometimes?" he finally asks, balling his hand into a fist underneath the table.
You look away for a moment, not thinking that this separation can be harder than it already is.
"It's ridiculous, forget it." he protests to himself as you keep staying silent.
"Stephen. It's dangerous but. Maybe possible? The cost is high, and we know so little about the multiverse." you sigh. "I think, at first, America can deliver important messages. Apart from learning and looking for her moms. If I find anything useful from Reed's research, then maybe I would be able to tell if we can meet. And if we can, I'm sure there is a certain amount of time either of us can spend outside our universe. Without triggering an incursion."
"Okay. Yeah. Great, good." he says random words just to keep the dialogue going.
"Stephen, I hope I'm not putting a threat upon your universe." you admit what's been on your mind the whole time.
"I told you, we're okay, it's alright, don't worry."
You both fall silent again, listening to a faint talking of sorcerers outside.
"I'm going to miss you too." he says, eyes a bit teary.
You get up, this goodbye is too hard. A memory of your Strange's funeral flashes before your eyes, and you grab a chair to keep yourself straight. Your Cloak covered the action from Strange, who was busy standing up.
"We should get going to New York. I believe she's already up." you leave the library first, secretly wiping the tears from your cheeks.
Chapter 20: A Man Without Love
You see America already in the yard, she looks a bit tired or sad, but joyful nonetheless.
"Morning, Miss Chavez" you greet her and her face lights up.
"Hey, y/n!" she waves to you. Stephen and Wong walk up to you, faces sorrowful.
"Well, ready to go?" Stephen asks and you turn around to see him smiling sadly.
"Who can ever be ready?" you answer, feeling tears in your eyes once again.
"Earth 838, if that helps," you say to America and she nods, rolling up the sleeves of her jacket and concentrating.
"Goodbye, Master Wong." you nod to him, be smiles and motions for you to hug him.
The hug is short but he manages to say in your ear, "good luck, y/n."
You pull away and watch America punch the bright blue portal. You turn to Stephen and see tears running down his cheeks. You can't control your waterfall and run to hug him one last time. "Goodbye, y/n," he says, hugging you stronger than before. You completely melt in his embrace but the time is running out.
"I love you," you whisper, pulling away, and touching his face. With your thumb, you wipe his tears and slowly kiss his cheek. You taste his salty tears on your lips and almost control yourself from sobbing. He understands that this confession is not for him, it's for your Stephen, but he welcomes it nonetheless.
You pull away from his grasp and hurry towards the portal. "Visit me some time, yeah?" you ask America and she nods, secretly looking at two sorcerers behind you. "Okay" you whisper to yourself and turn back to look at Strange one last time, shooting him a smile. He smiles back sadly.
You step through the star-shaped portal on the roof of some building. The familiar air engulfs you, and you smile to yourself. How much you've missed your universe is an indescribable feeling.
"Oh, home sweet home," you say to yourself but America hears you too. You turn around and see her standing shily, hands behind her back. "I thought you'll be staying with Stephen."
"Oh, we thought that you might need some company. Even for a little bit." she smiles.
"I feel like we're divorced parents with child custody" you mutter to yourself and put on a sling ring. "Ready to go?" you ask, already opening a portal to Sanctum.
"Yeah, let's go," she says and eagerly goes after you.
The Sanctum looks still the same as it did 2 days ago. The broken cups on the floor and the already dried stain of spilt tea. It's quiet, and maybe for the first time in years, you feel welcomed here.
"Mordo?" you shout. No answer. So he's probably still at the Illuminati quarters.
"I have a feeling that we have to visit that weird place again." America sighs.
"You're not wrong again. Kay, brace yourself, I don't think the view is going to be pleasant." you open a portal to the main part of the Illuminati building and turning back around, say, "unless you want to stay here until I come back. I'll understand."
"No, it's okay, I'm going." she puts her head up and catches up with you in a minute. "Holy shit," she says shocked. The room is completely destroyed, Ultron bots, or what's left of them, scattered on the floor.
"Holy shit indeed," you say back, going a bit further to another room. There, employees in white lab coats are lying dead in their pools of blood, some of them on the floor, others - awkwardly leaning on their work tables. The whole building is silent, and you feel like you're in a bad horror movie. Going into another room, or a little hall, you see bodies of the Earth's greatest Defenders. Charles - awkwardly lying in his yellow car machine, Peggy - literally cut in half and her shield stuck in the column. Maria - lying under a pile of bricks; Black Bolt lying with his head squashed and some blue material that you almost recognize as all that was left from Reed.
You pull America by her shoulders away from the horrible sight and go toward the main hall where you left Mordo. Barely seeing the way through the curtain of tears you reach the doors and with great struggle manage to open them. The hall seems empty at first but then you notice a figure sitting by the wall in the corner. Mordo. America frees from your grasp and goes in his direction.
"Wait, America," you say and the figure moves. Mordo lifts his head up and looks at you with bloodshot eyes.
"Oh, look who came back." he spits out, still tied with the Chains of Krakkan, tired from the struggle. Sorcerer Supreme or not, no one easily gets out of the spell. What surprised you the most was that the spell was still there, although Stephen left the universe. His nose and mouth were still bloody but the blood has already stopped and dried. He looked like a madman.
"I'm surprised you managed to survive. Unlike every other person in the building," you say, nearing his pathetic figure, your Cloak leaves your shoulders and stays with America.
"Stephen's Cloak? You stole it?" he says, eyes wide, looking at the Cloak and America. His eyes harden upon seeing the girl alive and well.
"I still have some dignity. Can't say the same thing about you." you spit back.
"Don't be ridiculous. That child is a threat, she has to be relieved of her powers."
"You know nothing about her, you know nothing about anything that's been going on, you self-absorbed ignorant dick." he's testing your patience.
"I know enough to see that she's dangerous and you're out of you damned mind!" Mordo shouts, trying to pull his hands out of the chains. Unsuccessfully.
"Oh, I am very much in my mind, believe me. I think it's time to ask some questions," you say, squatting before him.
"Release me, this is madness. I am the Sorcerer Supreme, I command you to release me!"
"You are fucking nothing while you're here. Now, I'm gonna ask you some questions and you're not going to lie, because if you do, America will punch you to a universe where legs grow from your butt!" you shout back at him. America raises her eyebrows at you but stays silent.
"Well, ask, as you can see I have nothing better to do." he shoots back angrily. You resist punching him once again and begin pacing.
"Where did you get the Darkhold? Did Wanda really give it away willingly or was it you behind all that?"
"Are you out of your mind? Of course, Wanda gave it away, you heard her, I'm sure loud and clear."
"Well, I don't know, maybe you forced her to give it away? And Stephen was the perfect target, wasn't he?"
"I would never do this to my friend," he says, trying to get out of the chains again.
"A friend? Stephen himself knew what a two-faced snake you were but for whatever crazy reason, he still trusted you. Answer me, did you give him the idea that a solution to beating Thanos was in the Darkhold?"
"What makes you think like that?"
"Because, you know, the other Strange, he used Time Stone to look into the future, and found a solution. A hard one but still a solution. And you just probably said 'oh Stephen, read the BOOK OF THE DAMNED although we all know how CURSED it is!', am I lying?" you were barely controlling your voice in front of America, afraid that you might scare her away. Using his magical boots Mordo stood up and crossed the distance between you.
You didn't even move a single muscle. Eyes burning with rage, nostrils flaring, you were waiting for what he had to say. Or lie.
"There was no other way," he said, face close to yours.
"Oh, you know, Stephen destroyed a universe, without realizing that and then, oh who could've guessed, Darkhold NEVER had a solution to our problems and we used the Book of Vishanti in the end. What a coincidence, isn't it?" you say, voice low and threatening.
"You're not listening, y/n, , it had to be like that."
"Don't bullshit me, Mordo!" you point a finger to his chest harshly and he swings a bit. "Confess if you ever were a friend to him."
He stays silent for a while and you begin pacing again. In the corner of your eye, you see America sitting on the ground, your Cloak floating near her. She looks at the encounter with wide eyes. Not how she expected things to go here.
"Okay, I did it. I convinced Wanda to give the book to us. She was easy to persuade, and didn't want to keep the book anyway." you feel your blood begin to boil in your veins and take a deep breath in and out.
"So, you suggested that he should look for a solution in the Darkhold?"
"I suggested that first to the committee and the majority of them agreed," he says, also trying to calm himself.
"You... Ugh, you piece of shit." you stop and squeeze your forehead with two fingers. "Why? Why the Darkhold? You knew that the Book of Vishanti existed. Why not it first?"
"I'm sure you knew about it too, why didn't you think of it, sweetheart?" he spits out.
"Oh, after you fed me lies that this book is a myth only, and I got to know after Stephen found it? And then built a way to hide it in the place where universes connect? Great thinking, genius." you feel like you can't think straight, the anger you feel is so strong that you almost black out.
"Listen, y/n... "
"WHAT..." you begin loudly, the echo in the hall making you flinch, "was the reason behind all of this? Did you want Stephen dead? So you could enjoy the warm seat in the Illuminati and be the Sorcerer Supreme?"
He looks you in the eyes, face suddenly changing expression. You wait, stopping before him and balling a fist behind your back.
"Because I loved you," he says.
You blow a strand of your hair from your face and begin pacing yet again. America looks shocked, that's not what she expected at all.
"No." you say, shaking your head almost aggressively, "no you didn't."
"I did. Y/n, it was all for you, I did that for you."
"No, no you didn't."
"I loved you, you were so perfect and he-he was a prick. He was a self-absorbed man who would push you off a cliff if that meant saving another worthless life."
"And what, you wouldn't?" you say, getting close to him again. "You'd push me for free."
"He didn't deserve your love. He was destined to be destroyed by one of his sacrifices. I-I would've found a solution quicker than him, better than he found, and I would still be standing before you, and not underground." he stresses the last word and that is your breaking point.
You pretend to turn around but then spin your heel and punch him in the stomach. You hear your fingers crack and America gasps loudly. He folds like a sheet of paper and falls to his knees, to your surprise, letting out a laugh.
"I loved you since the first moment you stepped into Kamar-Taj, I cared for you, I COULD'VE BEEN MUCH BETTER THAN HE WAS!"
"This isn't love! It's fucking obsession! You don't think I haven't noticed how you were trying to leave things for me? You really think that I haven't noticed how you were staring like a fucking creep? Everywhere I went, I felt your eyes on me. You think I don't feel that now? Accepting me into the Illuminati? Making me your apprentice? You think I'm blind?"
"All this... I did all these things for you and yet it was not enough. Some guy with an ego bigger than his junk comes here and you run after him like a blinded doe?"
You don't say anything. You don't even know what to say at all.
"I mean, our Strange I understand. He was ALWAYS there, but that guy you helped run away? He's a criminal. He wanted to destroy our universe. Why are you so narrow-minded y/n?" he asks in a tone full of pity and your anger rises again.
"Get your facts right first, then maybe you can call others criminals. What, you're gonna go and say that I'm a criminal too? A criminal, who helped a girl and a man save universes? And stop Scarlet Witch? Oh, by the way, go thank Wanda for her magnificent decision to give you the Darkhold, I'm sure you'll be besties after what happened now." you say and see him sitting on heels, head down, looking at the ground. "I hope you think of better lies this time at the funeral." you swallow your tears and with a flick of your fingers, the magical chains that have been holding him, disappear into thin air.
Mordo moves his hands a bit and sees you turning to leave. He quickly shoots up and catches up to you, gripping your arm. "Please y/n, let's just forget that and return to Sanctum. We can pretend nothing happened."
You turn to look at him, eyes full of hatred. "I want you to resign."
His hand leaves yours. "What?"
"I want you to resign from the position of the Sorcerer Supreme," you repeat.
"Don't be ridiculous, y/n, I can't do it, especially not at times like these."
"Resign and we will keep this a secret. Or... Or I'm telling everyone how you set up Stephen and then created this tale about his sacrifice. I'm not bowing before a fucking traitor." you say through gritted teeth.
"Oh, and who's gonna take my place?" he mocks, now grabbing that one last straw of survival.
"I will." without hesitation you answer, remembering the dialogue you had with Stephen last night.
"Oh, so YOU'VE been the one eyeing the place, of course, of course," he says looking at you suspiciously.
"She'll be a way better Master than you," America says loudly, finally feeling like it was her moment to intervene.
"You have no right to talk here!" he shouts, jutting towards the girl and you form a shield in front of him.
"If you even touch her, be sure that I will personally cut you into pieces." you threaten and he takes a step back.
"What happened that your heart is full of anger?" he mutters and then turns away to leave.
You let out a humourless laugh, "what happened? You might ask yourself that, when you got Stephen killed. I hope I won't see you sneaking around either Sanctums or I'll tell everyone the truth." you say as calmly as possible, although inside you feel a big storm. One last look at you and he leaves the hall. You take a deep breath but fall on your knees.
" Y/n!" America shouts and runs to you, putting your broken pieces together with a hug.
"He was right. Stephen was right. Mordo did slip him the idea." you say, eyes teary and voice broken. "And all these years he fed me lies, how could I've been so stupid."
"You were hurt, of course, you believed him, it's okay now." America tries to calm you, and you feel grateful that Stephen and Wong suggested to stay with you.
What felt like hours later, you got up, wiped your tears and called Cloaky back on your shoulders. Now, more important things had to be done. Like funerals. Taking America by her hand, you walk out of the hall and go towards the dead bodies of Illuminati members. The day just started but you were sure that organizing caskets and flowers is going to take the whole day.
Chapter 21: Funeral for a Friend
The next day America returned to Earth 616, promising to visit you again, during the official ceremony of you becoming the Sorcerer Supreme. You knew she'll be back soon but the goodbye was still bitter. You were also pretty sure that she will tell Strange and Wong about what happened with Mordo, and that Strange is going to be angry as fuck.
Mordo did return to the Sanctum the same evening. Said he'll announce his resignation during the funeral of Illuminati members. But never apologized. Typical.
You were busy organizing funeral stuff and crying your eyes out in the spare time. After you learned the truth, it was much harder to accept the fact that your Stephen was gone. Along with your friends - Charles and Reed.
Two days after your return, was the day of the great funeral - the Illuminati members, to ordinary people known just as America's (or even world's) greatest heroes, were surrounded by their supporters on their very last journey. The hall was full, Mordo took the stand and looked at you, fixing the microphone.
Your face hardened and he looked away.
"Today, we say the last goodbye to Earth's greatest defenders - Reed Richards, Captain Peggy Carter, Captain Marvel or as the closest ones called her - Maria, Charles Xavier, Blackagar Boltagon and scientist Christine Palmer. They were all victims of a brutal attack from the cosmos and sacrificed themselves to protect us. To protect you. Many great ordinary people gave their lives away as well, and even though they are not here, together with great heroes, but already resting in their final destination, I, Sorcerer Supreme, want everyone in this hall, and everyone in the world, watching, to pay your respects with a minute of silence. "
Mordo stops, looking at the ground for a minute. The hall is quiet, only some of the closest friends and family members of the fallen ones are crying silently. The camera man in the left corner wipes his eyes, a woman behind you sighs loudly. You're trying to keep calm, although the loss of your friends is tearing you apart.
"Thank you." Mordo says loudly, bringing you out from your thoughts. "Now before we all go to the graveyard, I have an announcement. Possibly for the first time in years, as this has happened only couple of times in the past, I am... I am resigning from my position as the Sorcerer Supreme and leaving the magic world. My place will be soon taken by my student, my closest friend, and the woman I respect the most, y/n y/l/n." a loud wave of murmuring passes through the hall, and you're sure that people near the TVs are doing the same. "The decision was a difficult one to make but it had to be done. Thank you for the opportunity you all gave me to help and serve you and protect the world. I'm sure you'll be just as safe in great hands of a great woman." he points at you, sitting in the first row, dressed in black suit. You feel everyone's eyes on you, hear every word of dissatisfaction.
"Please, y/n, take the stand for a couple of words before we go to the graveyard." Mordo says, pushing you into an uncomfortable situation before the whole world. You feel how blood is leaving for face, and you're damn sure that everyone, especially Mordo, noticed how pale you've became.
Climbing up the stairs you feel your legs getting wobbly, and the heels are not the case this time. You reach the stand, Mordo stands aside. With one hand fixing the microphone, you take a moment to look at all the people sitting here. Everyone united by the same pain, everyone here with the same purpose. You awkwardly cough, desperately searching for something to say but then you decide to go with your heart.
"Like my colleague said," you shoot a glance at Mordo, "today we say goodbyes to greatest defenders, who sacrificed themselves for the greater good. Their unselfish action will be forever engraved in our hearts and minds." you fall silent for a moment. Everyone is looking at you and you suddenly feel so small in this big hall that you fight the urge to leave and never come back. "Sorcerer Supreme's decision is highly respected and welcomed. I'm sure that for some of you it will be a great loss but I promise... I swear to protect you from any threat that's yet to come. Thank you." you bow to the people and stand aside.
Mordo returns to the microphone and announces, "now we will go to the graveyard where we will say a final goodbye to our brothers and sisters." he leaves and as everyone stands up, casting one last look at the six caskets, covered with America's flags, all except Peggy's - she's honored with United Kingdom's flag. You have almost reached the stairs when heartbreaking funeral music began and someone side-hugged you. Mordo. Pretending to be a gentleman one last time and your friend as well, he helps you get down the stairs, placing his hands on your side so softly that you almost puke.
"That was a nice speech. Although it lacked something." he says, face close to yours, you feel his breathing on your skin.
"A punch to your face, right?" you answer, not liking how close he is but pretending to be a lonely heartbroken girl who needs assistance in front of everyone.
"Charming as always. The ceremony will be held next week, I hope you will enjoy the dangers of being the one in charge." he spits, patting your shoulder a bit roughly and leaving you alone.
You are among the people who leave the hall last. You don't want the attention, everyone looking at your back or anything else. You just want to go back to Sanctum and wrap yourself with warm sheets. Or go back to Stephen.
A car wait for you outside and you sit in the front, greeting the chauffeur. A handsome young man, probably in his 30s.
"You're late Miss, we were supposed to take off alongside the friends and family." he says calmly. You feel that he's not judging or complaining about you leaving the last.
"I think what matters is that we go there at all." you sign and look at him. He shoots you a shy smile and starts the car.
"So uh... Were you that girl who fought along with Doctor Strange versus Thanos?" he asks after a moment of silence.
"Yes."
"Whoa, cool." he says and you raise an eyebrow. "I-i mean not cool.. I'm not saying that it probably wasn't cool but not cool to remind you about your friend. Shit." he focuses on the road, all red from embarrassment.
"Thanks for a little understanding, some people don't even have it." you say and sink into the seat. You dread the moment you reach the graveyard and have to not break in front of everyone.
"Yeah, you're welcome." he answers, glancing at you once in a while until you see the crowd of people, so thick that you can't even see half of the gravestones. The car stops and young man beside you smiles sadly. "We're here. From the looks of it, I think you've missed the beginning."
"Yeah, could be." you say, not moving an inch from the seat. He takes off his seatbelt and grasping the wheel in front of him, looks at you again.
"You're coming, Miss?"
"Yeah. Yeah." you mutter, slowly taking off the seatbelt and opening the car door.
"You need company, Miss?" he asks, eyes full of compassion.
"If you don't have anywhere else to be, that would be okay." you answer silently, looking at the man for a moment longer.
"No, Miss, Mr Stark said to fulfill all your wishes."
"Stark? Is he here?" you almost jump out of you seat.
"No, Miss, he is abroad with Miss Potts."
"Oh." you say and push yourself to get out of the car.
He gets out as well, trailing behind you. Reaching the graveyard you stop in the back.
The sun is shining brightly - the atmosphere is nothing close to the one that was during Stephen's funeral. An hour later, all the attendees began to leave, family and friends too. Susan Stom passes by, sobbing into her brother's chest. You feel terrible and somehow responsible for what happened and cast your eyes to the side.
Everyone leaves, you see how Mordo opens a portal to an apartment, and you guess that it's where he's living now.
You look around and notice your driver standing near the entrance to the graveyard. As much as you don't want to keep the guy waiting, there's still one place you have to visit.
Taking small steps in your heels, you go to Strange's grave. Fresh flowers in the vase, you wonder who was here.
'Stephen Vincent Strange, beloved mentor, neurosurgeon, and Earth's Mightest Hero' you read over and over again, words engraved in the white stone.
"Oh, baby, I miss you so much." you let yourself be corrupted by pain and fall to your knees, crying.
The chauffeur notices the weird action and hurries to your side, thinking that you have fainted. He finds you sobbing uncontrollably, whole body shaking, lungs barely getting any oxygen. He, at first, puts a hand on your shoulder, but seeing that you don't push him away, he falls to his knees as well, hugging you. Feeling at least a bit of support, you hug him back, fingers grasping the hem of his suit jacket. He says nothing, just patiently waits for you to calm down.
What felt like forever later, you finally calm down, and apologize to the poor man.
"It's okay Miss, don't you worry yourself about that." he offers you his hand and you stand up, nails almost digging into his forearm. You reach the car and he helps you sit down, putting on the seatbelt.
The move and touches might seem intimate but for whatever reason you completely trust the guy, he did wait for you patiently, although he definitely knew that you could just open a portal and get straight home. A knight in shining Stark's car. That's how would call him. Or you could just ask his name.
"Hey. This might seem stupid but I never asked your name." you say as he starts the car and begins driving, sun still shining brightly, but the air feels somewhat chilly.
"It's William, Miss. Or Billy for short." he answers, smiling a bit, but not letting his eyes off the road. Ahead you notice a huge traffic jam.
"Well, nice to meet you, Billy. I'm sure you already know who I am."
"Yes, Miss y/l/n. I believe that you're going to be a perfect Sorcerer Supreme." he blushes a bit.
"Why, thank you, Billy. That's very kind of you." you both fall silent again, and you feel that you should ask something again. Having a conversation with someone out of a completely different sphere felt refreshing.
"So... How long have you been working for Stark?"
"3 years, Miss."
"Oh. So, uh.. Drive anyone important?"
"Yeah, the President."
"Wow, that's really important." you say and he laughs.
"I think, Miss, that you're even more important than the President now." now it was your turn to blush and you were beyond glad when he took a turn to a different road and avoided the traffic. You recognized the familiar neighborhood and houses - Greenwich Village. In a moment the car stopped. You saw the Sanctum, now completely empty and cold.
"Thank you, Billy. Truly. For everything." you say undoing your seatbelt and opening the car door.
"No need to thank, Miss. I hope you have a great evening." he says, blushing like a schoolboy.
"You too, Billy, you too." you close the car door and walk up the stairs, the big Sanctum doors opening on their own for you. Before going in, you turn around and notice that Billy still hasn't left his previous spot. He shyly waves to you. You wave back and watch him finally drive away. A least there's still some goodness in the world. You go inside, opening a portal to your room, too tired to climb million stairs. Without even undressing, you fall onto the bed and feel how sleep overtakes your body and soul. A weird dream engulfs you and takes you away from the Sanctum Sanctorum...
#stephen strange#838 stephen strange#america chavez#baron mordo#doctor strange#wong#doctor strange in the multiverse of madness#stephen strange x reader#stephen strange is a dad to america#wanda maximoff#tony stark#cloak of levitation
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Part Forty-Three: We're in the Endgame Now
[slow burn romance between Steve Rogers and SHIELD agent Emma Baker]
Warnings: 18+, contains humor, fluff, mental health, family trauma, romance, angst, language, violence.
installment list
Word count: 2.2k
An unexpected guest gives Emma the most hope she's had in five years.
One morning a few weeks later Emma and Steve are driving to Brooklyn so they can go to a few bakeries to decide on a cake for the wedding. They are almost to the first bakery when Steve gets a phone call. "Hey Nat," he starts off the call with.
From the driver's side, Emma glances over at Steve and notices his expression of concern at the call, so when he hangs up, she asks, "What's up? Is it something with Clint?"
"No, but you need to turn around and get us to the Compound ASAP," he tells her with a sense of urgency in his voice.
Quickly, Emma hits the brakes and turns the truck in the direction of the Compound. "Is everything okay? Answer carefully, your answer determines how fast I drive."
Steve chuckles at the joke and responds with, "There's been a development and she needs us there yesterday pretty much."
"Got it," Emma replies and puts more pressure on the gas pedal. While she drives, Steve calls the bakeries they had appointments at and apologizes for the cancellation but tells them an emergency came up.
Once they get to the Compound and start to head inside, Emma sees an unfamiliar brown van outside and wonders to herself who it belongs to. They rush into the main conference room to see Natasha sitting at her desk looking exhausted watching a very stressed-out man pacing the room while muttering to himself and eating a sandwich. The man is Scott Lang, the one that Sam and Emma fought all those years ago when Emma first became an Avenger.
When Lang sees Steve, he shouts, "Steve! Cap! Captain. America. Thank God you're here."
"Scott, what's going on?" Steve asks.
Not knowing where to start, Lang starts rambling. "Well what happened was that I was doing a routine trip in and out of the Quantum Realm with Hank and them, but then when I get out it's five years later, my daughter is all grown up, and half the population is gone?"
"Quantum what...? Scott, calm down," Steve tells him, putting his hands up. Lang stops pacing for a few seconds and Steve asks, "Can you go a bit slower?"
"Steve, I've been trying to get him to calm down this whole time," Nat tells him. Emma makes her way over to Natasha and gives her a hug before taking a seat to listen to what Lang has to say.
"Okay," he says and takes a deep breath while running his hands over his face. "Has anyone here studied quantum physics?"
Steve and Emma send each other a confused look while Nat replies with, "Just to make conversation, why?"
With that answer, he runs his hand through his hair and continues with, "All right, so five years ago, right before...before Thanos, I was in a place called the Quantum Realm. It's like its own microscopic universe. To get in you have to be extremely small. Hope...she was my...uh...she was supposed to pull me out of there, but then Thanos happened and she was gone while I got stuck in there."
"Oh wow..." Emma mumbles.
"That must have been a long five years alone in there," Natasha tells him sadly.
"That's the thing," Lang tells her. "For me, it was five hours. The rules of the Quantum Realm are different from the rules here. Everything there is unpredictable."
Steve scrunches his eyebrows and asks, "What are you talking about? That doesn't make sense."
"What I'm saying is that time works differently there, the problem is we can't navigate it. I just...I can't stop thinking about it though, what if we could somehow control the chaos and navigate it? What if there was a way to enter the Quantum Realm at one point and exit at another point in time? Like...like before Thanos."
"Wait hold on, are you talking about a time machine?" Steve asks incredulously. He had officially heard it all with this theory of Lang's...
"No, no, not a time machine. It's more like a...uh..." Emma and Nat raise their eyebrows and give each other a look that Lang notices. He sighs and admits, "Yeah like a time machine...it's crazy, I know, but I just...I can't stop thinking about it."
"Scott," Natasha interrupts him. "I get emails from a raccoon, nothing is crazy anymore."
"So who do we talk to about this?" Lang asks.
Emma, Steve, and Nat give each other a look, knowing who they need to get in contact with. Emma is the first to speak up, saying, "Stark." She pauses and adds, "He isn't gonna like us coming asking for this though. He hasn't said anything to me since the day they signed me back on and Pepper is usually MIA too which is understandable, they wanna have a normal life but..."
"I get that he wants a normal life, but this is the first lead we've had in years," Natasha tells her. "We have to at least try."
"Nat's right," Steve agrees.
"Well then let's get going!" Lang shouts with a smile on his face.
So the four of them head out to Nat's car to drive to Tony and Pepper's. Steve and Nat sit in the front and discuss the plan of what to say to Tony while Emma and Lang make small talk in the backseat. "Hey, I'm sorry I didn't say anything, but I just thought I'd apologize for what happened between us before," he tells Emma.
Knowing that he was talking about what happened with her, him, and Sam and knowing that Sam never wanted Steve to know, Emma tries to cut him off from elaborating on the story more with a quick, "Oh no worries."
"No, really, I feel bad that I ruined your things and-"
Emma makes a motion for him to cut it out and this is when Steve takes notice of the conversation happening in the back. He looks in the rearview mirror at Emma and smirks, asking, "What's going on back there, is everything okay?" To up the ante, he adds, "Scott, you haven't met Emma yet, have you? She's my fiancee."
Lang scrunches his eyebrows and replies, "Well I haven't interacted with her in a long time, but-"
Emma quickly steps in with, "Yeah, it's been a crazy day so far, we haven't had time to talk until now."
Lang finally gets the drift and looks to Steve and asks, "Oh so she doesn't know you know does she?"
Steve chuckles as Emma asks, "What doesn't she know you know?"
"That I know what happened between you, Sam, and Scott," Steve replies.
Emma's jaw drops and she asks, "So he told you? Damnit, Wilson, I was gonna take that secret to the grave with me!"
"He did in fact tell me," Steve says. "I hear Scott here totally kicked your ass."
Emma scoffs and defends herself, saying, "Not to speak ill of the dead, but Sam totally got whooped worse than I did!"
"That's just because you're more of a long-range fighter. My skills are more close range," Lang tells Emma. She laughs and after that, the whole car engages in the talk about the plan to convince Tony to help them out with their idea.
Before they know it they reach the Stark property. As they pull up and get out of the car they see Tony carrying a now roughly five-year-old Morgan in his arms. At the sight of everyone, Tony sends Morgan inside so she doesn't have to be a part of the conversation. Emma follows Steve and Natasha up to where Tony is and can tell Tony doesn't look happy to see them all, as she expected.
Once Morgan is inside, Steve, Natasha, Emma, and Lang meet Tony on the porch to discuss what happened to Lang as well as his idea. After explaining the rough concept, Lang tells Tony, "I...I know, it sounds crazy but..."
Trying to encourage Tony to help, Steve adds, "Tony, after everything you've seen throughout the years, is anything really impossible?"
At this, Tony starts mouthing off some scientific terms that go straight over Emma's head. She tries not to show her confusion so they have a better chance at getting help though. He ends his statement with, "In layman's terms, you're not coming home."
"Lang did," Emma retorts.
"No," Tony says sternly, pointing a finger at Emma and then focusing his attention back on Lang. "He accidentally survived. There's a huge difference there."
"But," Emma tries to get in, getting desperate for help getting everyone back.
"It's a billion to one cosmic fluke and now you want to do a...what are you guys calling it?"
"A...a time heist?" Lang replies.
"Of course! Why didn't we think of this before some of us tried to move on with our lives? Oh right, because it's laughable and impossible."
Steve interrupts his snarky comments and tells him, "The stones are in the past. If we go back we can get them."
Natasha piggybacks on his statement, saying, "Then we snap our own fingers and bring everyone back."
"Or we screw it up more than it already is," Tony smarts back.
"I don't think we would," Steve retorts.
"I gotta say, I did miss that giddy optimism. Say, Baker, tell me this: is he always like this even at home? Taking charge, trying to be the optimist in everything?"
"If it wasn't for Steve's optimism and support I wouldn't be standing here right now, so I'd watch it if I were you, Stark," Emma replies, getting fed up with his attitude.
Tony puts his hands up and continues his thoughts with, "Well even with all of that optimism, having high hopes won't help if there's no possible way to go through with your idea. If we try, I think we all die."
"Not if we strictly follow the rules of time travel!" Lang chimes in. "You know, no talking to our past selves, no betting on sporting events-"
"I'm gonna stop you right there, Scott," Tony tells him, putting up his hand. He leans forward in his chair and asks, "Are you really going to sit there and tell me that your plan to bring back half the population of the universe is based on Back to the Future?"
Lang scoffs and replies, "What? No!"
Emma rolls her eyes as she turns to lean on the railing and lets out a quiet sigh of frustration. Steve subtly steps back to where she is and rubs her arm to comfort her and help her destress before she blows up on Tony.
Natasha finally speaks up and tells him, "Tony. We have to take a stand."
"We did take a stand five years ago and look where we are now," he replies.
Lang looks at Tony and then glances inside, saying, "Look, I know you have a lot on the line here. You've got a wife and a daughter, but I lost someone very important to me. A lot of people did. But now...now we have a chance to bring them all back and you're telling me that you won't even try?"
"That's right, Scott, I can't."
The frustration building up inside of Emma finally comes to a tipping point and she whips around to give Tony an earful but then Morgan comes back out onto the porch and jumps into Tony's lap telling him that she came there to rescue him. Not wanting Morgan to have to witness arguing like she did as a child, Emma balls up her fist and bites her cheek. Steve takes her balled-up fist and eases his hand into hers and squeezes to let her know she did the right thing in not yelling at him.
Tony picks Morgan up and informs everyone that the table is set for everyone, and Steve in a last-ditch attempt to sway him says, "Look, I get it. I'm happy that you have this life now, but this...this is a second chance. We have to take it."
"This is my second chance," Tony tells him and kisses Morgan's shoulder. He then nods his head at Emma and says, "And there's your second chance. I don't see what the problem is here."
"The problem is-" Steve tries but is interrupted.
"Ah, ah. If you don't talk shop you can stay for lunch. Otherwise..." Tony tells him before heading inside with Morgan.
"I guess we'll be on our way then," Steve replies and starts to walk back to the car they came in.
"Darn, I was hoping for a meal," Lang mumbles as they walk back.
As they get into the back seat, Emma tells him, "When we get back I can cook whatever you'd like. Maybe if we get some food in us we can think better."
Lang nods but then looks to the front seat and says to Steve, "We aren't giving up, are we? We need this to happen."
"No we aren't stopping, but we need to do this right, and to do that we're gonna need a really big brain..."
Lang looks at him and scrunches his eyebrows, asking, "Bigger than Tony Stark's?"
"I have someone in mind," Natasha replies and pulls out her phone to try and get a hold of Bruce Banner.
next chapter
taglist: @mrsevans90
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🌿✨🎀🎀 (that's right TWO compliments, and here's one from me too bc you deserve them all: i love the way your fics feel like they take place in a universe full of life and detail even around the main characters or events. even the shorter ones still feel like you have a detailed picture of who the characters are and what parts of them you want to portray or focus on, and it makes reading that much smoother and more immersive!)
OH MY GODDDD BEANIE YOU'RE THE SWEETEST. Genuinely teared up over here... I get so happy whenever I get any kind of message notif but AGH??? SO DETAILED? CRYING.
(Fic writer asks here!)
🌿how does creating make you feel?
Ahhh this is a big question! I like creating! But it can certainly be daunting sometimes... I think it's because I mostly do art. I find myself enjoying it less these days since I'm usually drawing for others in return for money. I keep taking commissions because I need money but it does take the joy out of creating sometimes. But whenever I do get to sit down and draw something I really enjoy, it's cathartic. It reminds me of why I still draw - it's that amazing gift I have to be able to make anything I want with my hands. And it fuels me with passion! I get really excited to see what else I can make! I have my ruts here and there but ultimately, I see creativity as a beautiful outlet and I'm really grateful for it. This all applies to writing too, of course!
✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)
ueihfjidsjgdsi I'm tempted to list one of my wips BECAUSE I DO NOT POST ENOUGH HELP DSDSFIJGD
If I had to pick, probably my John Watson x Reader Soulmate AU fic "A Silent Fate"! I thought it was a flop so I never had the motivation to finish it, but it's still one of my favorite ideas.
It uses the soulmate AU where everyone has the first words their soulmate says to them written on their arm. The twist is that the reader is mute! John Watson goes about his life, assuming that he simply doesn't have a soulmate - that theory further hardened after meeting Sherlock Holmes, a man who breaks all conventionality and rejects conformity. Then one day, the reader and John cross paths and the reader has to get creative with how they "talk" with John.
I really really love this idea because I'm all about "thinking outside of the box" and challenging myself with something uncommon. I don't think I see many mute!reader fics let alone mixed with the soulmate au so I wanted to give it a shot! I have the whole story drafted out... it's just unfortunate because I haven't felt the same way about the BBC Sherlock characters in a while ahaha
🎀🎀give yourself a compliment about your own writing
GAAHHH TWO!!! hmmm hmmmh mmm
✦ I like that my fics are long! It's something I get self-conscious of sometimes but I think it really shows how passionate I am about a fic when I can't stop writing. Because I really love adding all those little details and getting into the worldbuilding - it's my favorite part (the setup)!! I love the feeling of reading a good story that feels like it comes to life around me with characters who feel like real people. That's what I hope to achieve in my writing
✦ Another thing I like about my writing is ummm umumummum I like the way I write dialogue! Coming back to "making characters feel like real people", I LOVE writing extremely awkward pauses and fumbles in written dialogue (Explains why I love writing Reigen so much). Adding those "Um... erm... well-" and "AhaHAH-" just adds flavor and I'm way too obsessed with it
THANK YOU FOR THE ASKS AHHHH THIS WAS SO FUN!! ILYSM BEANIE 💗💗💗
#SOBBBIIINGNNNGN#I LOVED THIS SM#you're the sweetest ever....#seriously just made my night#buttery answers#writer asks#bittybeanie
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I was absent the day of your Zaquel thing so yes I would like to hear it again if it's not too much trouble
Okay, so basically it all goes back to the episode Overwhelmed. One key thing to remember throughout this whole analysis is that the episode takes place on Valentine's Day, all right? Now, in this episode, Artemis calls on Zatanna to help her contact Wally in the afterlife and Zatanna creates a ruse using M'gann's psychic powers and a spell that is literally just a big light show to make Artemis believe she had contacted Wally successfully. Now, my question regarding all that is why did Raquel have to be present at that scene at all unless her Valentine's Day plans got interrupted at the same time Zatanna's did when Artemis called her?
We all know the real reason Raquel was there was so that the audience could see the truth behind what Zatanna had done, and the in-universe reason was to offer emotional support to Artemis whenit was done. However, that in-universe reason seems a little flimsy if you ask me considering Zatanna already had M'gann there, claiming she was there for that reason. M'gann is definitely a much closer friend of Artemis' than Raquel is, and while I'm sure Artemis and Raquel are close, I feel like Zatanna really only needed to bring one other close friend to really sell the ruse. Plus, think about the real reason Raquel was there. What reason would Zatanna have to reveal what she had done to another person when that would only increase the chances of her getting caught in her lies unless she told Raquel the truth because there aren't supposed to be any secrets between them because they're involved romantically?
Plus you've also got two other things, in my opinion at least, that link Zatanna and Rocket together romantically and one of them is what happened in the final scene of the season three finale in Bibbo's Diner. All the members of the OG Team are there in the diner having a good time and all of them are sitting with their romantic partners or the closest thing they've got to one that season in the case of Artemis. Dick is with Barbara, Conner and M'gann are together, as are Kaldur and Wyynde, and Artemis, who is the only one still single at the time, is sitting with Will whom she did have a brief romantic storyline with that season. But then you've also got Raquel sitting with Zatanna. When you take into account who all the other Team members are sitting with, it only makes sense to say that Raquel and Zatanna might just be romantically involved after all. Plus there's that little glasses clink they do, which if you ask me is just LOADED with romantic chemistry.
The second thing pointing towards Zatanna and Raquel being together is the fact that Raquel is not wearing a wedding ring in any scene she is involved in in season three. When you take into account the fact that M'gann is never seen without her engagement ring, you have to assume the fact that Raquel doesn't have a wedding ring is not just an animation error and that her marriage that was mentioned in season two likely ended in between the seasons, leaving her free to pursue a romantic relationship with Zatanna. And you can't deny that Zatanna and Raquel had romantic chemistry even as far back as season two. I still think back to the "Maybe backwards is my native tongue" line from the Intervention episode in season two and can only really see that as flirting. I don't know how to explain why, that's just the way I see it.
Anyhoozles, that's my full analysis on why Zatanna and Raquel are more than likely a couple at this point in the series. Hope that answered your question, and if you or anyone else have any further questions, thoughts, or can provide any more proof to add to this theory, don't hesitate to share!
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My thoughts on Seabound!!! 🌊🌊🌊 (1/4)
SPOILERS ALERT!!!
Finally Nya's season! Our queen, our water goddess, our amazing girl gets what she deserves! 😍😍😍
What I know about the season beforehand is that Nya's powers apparently are getting problematic for some reasons? Which is a pretty common topic in other shows but it's a first in Ninjago, usually the elemental powers don't have focus and I LOVE that we now get to see stuff like that 💕💕💕
I know there should be Wojira involved, trusting The Island to deliver that little foreshadowing at the end of the episode 🤷♀️ Also Maya is back... MAYA IS FINALLY BACK AFTER SEVEN SEASONS YES!!! 😭😭😭
I have nothing else to say, I have no idea what this will bring, hopefully something as good as Master of the Mountain! 🖤
Alright, here we go!
GENERAL THOUGHTS
Warning reader, I might be fangirling to an extreme because I love mah girl Nya and I've been wanting Kai and Nya's parents to be back ever since Hands of Time ended. So yeah... screaming alert 😅
At this point I don't doubt that the intro is great, we reached such a level of animation and we got The Fold 😍😍 Love the marine vibe and how it's similar to The Island, because it's a great intro 👌
NOW I like the writing! Maybe they rushed the dialogue's quality for The Island to get here? It's just fun and in character, maybe it's just me but I'm enjoying it a lot for now
How many episodes are in this? Wiki says ten, then I checked again and it's sixteen like with Master of Mountain... eh, it looks good so far so it's fine whatever happens 🤷♀️
A BIG SPLASH
Oohhh, new villain! One that uses... flames... huh, does she know there's literally a master of fire in the ninja team? Eh whatever she looks cute, give it up for Miss Demeanor!! 👏👏
Wait... OMG IS THAT ERIN MATTHEWS??? WE GOT MACY!! ❤❤❤
Whoa, we're finding out where did the order of the vengestone from season 13 come from?? YAS! CONTINUITY!
Yep, there it is, Nya lost control... her attacks look so cool 😍
Lol that kid trying to be a nindroid and Zane being offended 😂😂 Sorry hun, you're that popular
Aaahhh, thank you Ninjago! You gave me back Nya the perfectionist 😂 I was worried her reaction to her powers wasn't going to be in character but it looks fair so far. Brings me back to Possession, my favorite season 💙💙💙
WE GOT BACK THE FACT THAT SHE CAN MAKE IT RAIN!!! YAS!!! I might be easy to please but I love these details 🤩
🤯🤯🤯 Okay they are definitely going somewhere this time and I LOVE IT, because wow. WOW. Are we actually addressing the forever questioned fact that wind and water weren't elements that Chen needed at the Tournament? Are we giving a reason for them to exist outside the main set of elements and the elemental masters?? Duuuude, season 15 don't let me stop you, keep going 😍
Mm, so water and wind are connected to Wojira (now I see the connection with the special). Are we setting the ground for a new master of wind? 😏😏 It's risky going for a Morro replacement but it's a super intriguing idea! Oooor Edgy Boy TM might come back? WHO KNOWS I'M CURIOUS ANYWAY 🤩
Love how it is universal knowledge that Nya is super indipendent 👌
YES YES FINALLY WE'RE TALKING ABOUT MAYA!!! 😍😍😍 Is it too much hoping into a Ray cameo as well?? Pleaaaase? Also addressing Krux after so many seasons, this feels exciting!! 😊
This is what I'm talking about, training, fighting scenes, show me everything that water goddess can do! 🌊🌊🌊
Aaahhh, Nya flexing her mightiness through anger, just to remind us that she is the descendant of a water master as much as of a fire master 😅
YES YES YES YES IT'S HAPPENING FINALLY AFTER SEVEN SEASON THE FIRE WATER PARENTS ARE FINALLY BACK!!! 🔥🌊🔥🌊🔥🌊 I'M SO HAPPY I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR SO LONG!!! 😭
RAY IS THERE TOO HECK YES!!!! 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 I shouldn't get this excited at only the first episode... WHO CARES RAY IS BAAAAACK!!! ❤❤❤
Omg Maya is definitely different from what I expected, turns out Kai's enthusiasm came from her 😂
Oh look at my flame babe 😍
He's so happy his parents are here, he's a total family man ❤❤❤
Nya is maaaaad... 😅
THERE SHE IS
WELCOME BACK JILLIAN I MISSED YOU 💚💚💚 Would it be too much having a "Your voice sounds familiar" moment with Maya and Lloyd? 😂
I'm so stoked for this! I want all the interactions I've missed for all of this time, asap!! HECK yes!! 😍😍😍😍
Oh, are we looking over the Miss Demeanor, vengestone situation? Mm... for now at least... WHO CARES FIRE WATER PARENTS!! 🔥🌊🔥🌊🔥🌊
THE CALL OF THE DEEP
Imma just slow clap for The Fold because this is another amazing intro, one of those things in this show that stays awesome no matter what happens 👍👍
So Maya gave Nya her discipline and perfectionism, but not the passion behind it 😂 I like this, it's not your conventional master of water, although I'd say it's different from the impression she gave me back in HoT. Maybe this is how she is when she's not trapped for fifty years? 😅😅
Is it too much asking for Kai and Ray bonding while the water women get the work done? 😅😅
Is this the sequel of Green Eggs and Ham?
Green Pancakes and Ham? 😂
Oh it's seaweed nevermind... at breakfast? I'm all for sushi rolls but this is a little 😅 Although since Maya missed their childhood she probably never cooked meals for them... how did I get myself sad 😢
Whoa, Maya is a strict teacher! I got flashbacks from my first and only dance lesson, teachers nitpicking every single pose, uuurrrggg I feel ya waterlily 😡
Again, not a fan of Misako, but coming from her the whole speech about wanting to be there for her child makes a lot of sense
Yes. YES.
YEEEEESSSS KAI AND RAY FAMILY BONDING THIS IS EVERYTHING I'VE EVER WANTED I'M GETTING ALL OF MY WISHES GRANTED FOR THIS ONE ❤🔥❤🔥❤🔥❤🔥❤🔥❤
AND MY FLAME BABE IS SO GLAD HE GOT HIS PARENTS!!! 😭😭😭
Lol with Kai's new hair they look even more related 🤣
Ray also sounds so happy he gets to have his moment with his son 😢 I feel so blessed in this moment 👍
Also this scene makes a lot of sense. Nya grew up to be indipendent, one that succeed in most of stuff without problems, she built her life without any help and doesn't look for it. Kai grew up more insecure, he got some walls up but loves to take care of others and be taken care of. With a childhood lost he looks forward to a bit of softness ❤❤
Did Maya make real bacon for that sandwich? Do I smell some favoritism? 😅 Or maybe she really wants Nya to get onto the water mind setting idk 🤷♀️
Little tiny complain, why isn't Jay doing the fixing? Did he give up mechanics completely? It feels like we haven't seen him do tech stuff in so long, I miss techy boy in action 😞
And no, having to check on the bathroom doesn't count 😅
Aww robot date 💜🤍💜🤍
AAAHH ROBOT DISASTER 😱😱😱 ZANE DANG IT YOU WERE DOING SO GOOD NOT TRYING TO DIE IN THE LAST TWO SEASONS!!
Oh that was weird, weird magic purple wave thingie?
I DID NOT ASK FOR A SEASON WITH A BEST GIRL AT THE EXPENCE OF ANOTHER BEST GIRL PIX DON'T YOU DARE DO THIS TO ME 😱😱😱😱😱
"Well this is troubling." I love this samurai so freaking much 💜💜💜
GUYS THIS IS ONLY THE SECOND EPISODE, I'M A LITTLE SCARED NOW 😢
Okay Nya admitting that something's wrong looking so apologetic, girl you don't need to do that you already own my heart 😭
Alright, I'm guessing this is Wojira's power or something, and they will have to go down below and find out why... just throwing this in, maybe Maya did something? Because she wanted to finally be with her family and needed an excuse? JUST A THEORY WITH NO BASE I REALLY HOPE I'M WRONG!!!
Okay, two episodes and I'm BEYOND engaged, let's keep it up! 😍
UNSINKABLE
Getting an idea how this episode might end already 😂😂
Look, I love best girl Pixal, but I'm kinda sad that she seems to be the only one tinkering at this point. Like, I saw Nya fix little stuff, while Jay dropped engineering altogether, I miss my engineers team 😭
Aww, the guys didn't want to crush Pixal's dream of an unsinkable boat 💜 But honestly yeah, I agree with Cole, this might end badly 😅😅
Thank goodness
I was worried they forgot about Jaya ❤💙❤💙 Jay is such a cutie omg
Nya: Mm, going on a potentially dangerous mission with unstable powers in the heart of my element or... mom's tofu pancakes... *yeets herself over the ship*
I'm making too many screenshots of the Smith family... WHO CARES THEY ARE BACK AND THEY ALL LOOK SO GOOD!!! 😍😍😍😍
Aww Ray wants to play with his son and his friends so CUTE ❤❤❤ Still can't believe they play Prime Empire after everything that went down 😂😂
Whoa whoa whoa, Kai and Cole are sitting this one out? That's actually interesting, I'm pretty sure I saw Cole's scuba suit in the sets though so I didn't expect it... lol it's actually kinda fair that the two that used to be afraid of water aren't going 😂😂
Bet Kai is happy to stay behind because he gets to spend time with his dad 😭
Also studying the fire elementals?? Uhm, yes please?? TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT MY FLAME BABE!!! 😍😍😍😍
I'm sure this one scene...
... made so many lavashippers happy ❤🖤❤🖤 Cole you got Ray's blessing
Ninja team acting cool while Jay is being Jay, it's how it always goes, it's the entire show's description and I absolutely love it 😂 That wink though 💙
PIRATE ZANE IS BACK 😂😂😂 Haven't seen him since Possession, and this time he's not even malfunctioning 👌 Pixal is so done with his dorky boyfriend 😝
Of course Jay already has a ghost butler theory going on 😂
OF COURSE IT'S MAYA 😂😂
To be honest muffins would sold me too 😅 Not sure if she will make them out of tofu again though...
It's actually really interesting that we still haven't met the actual enemies, it does build up excitment! Very curious about these squid guys 👍
Well what do you know, the Unsinkable sank. Who would have thought?
... yeah same, sorry Pix 😅
FIVE THOUSANDS FATHOMS DOWN
Aaaahhh, Nya fixing stuff! That's more like it!! 😍😍
Oww, that one speech, I've been waiting for so long for that! Maya just wants to catch up with her daughter and it's not her fault she was separated from her children, but Nya did everything on her own with Kai. Only fair she isn't seeking for her help right now... still sad 😢
Pff, with this ninja team there's not a moment of privacy 😂😂
Maya cleaning his future son-in-law's laundry what the HECK 😂😂😂 To be fair Jay has a bit of a history of having to change underwears during sea travels 😝
Zane was attached to a battery? When?... are you talking about that one scene in Prime Empire? Cause that's not really a flashback I wanna ha- whoops never mind got the flashback 😱
Maya looks more calm now, I think she's trying to act more reasonable and she's got good points 👍 I know people were a little weirded out by how more cheerful she looks in comparison to Hands of Time, but I think she gets the most serious and rational when time needs. That's actually fascinating of her 🤔
CALLING OUT AN ATTEMPTED MURDER
THIS GIRL IS TOO GORGEOUS MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT 🤩🤩🤩 Like my gosh that smirk, what the heck Pix 💜💜💜
Okay but Jay looking at Nya until the doors are completely closed?? CAN YOU FEEL MY JAYA HEART BEATING?? ❤💙❤💙
Whoa green gas I thought this was Nya's season 😂
MAYA WHY ARE YOU SAYING THIS STUFF YOU'RE SCARING ME 😱😱😱 I SWEAR LEGO IF YOU BROUGHT BACK WATER MOM JUST TO KILL HER OFF I'M GONNA SUE YOU 😭😭😭
I really REALLY like the atmosphere of the entrante of the temple! Super sealike and ancient! 🌊🌊🌊
Maya: off we go, into the spooky old temple! (Why does it feel like something Kai would say? 😂)
Oh gee, someone sleeping in the deep, who could that be? Coff Wojira coff
Whoa the jellyfishes look pretty lifelike!
HERE HE COMES
WELCOME BACK GILES!!! ONCE AGAIN ON A LEGO SHOW I MISSED YOU SO MUCH YOU AND YOUR GODLIKE VOICE!!! 😍😍😍😍 Gosh he's a villain but he's got Clay's voice, how can I even try to hate him?? 😅
Alright, knocking down my water girls, that is pretty hateful material... BUT CLAAAYYY 💙💙💙
So they need the two amulets to wake up Wojira? Isn't one on the island? Fire dad and son coming to the rescue? WHO KNOWS BUT I'M ENJOYING THIS A LOT SO FAR KEEP GOING SEABOUND 😍😍😍
#ninjago#ninjago season 15#ninjago spoilers#ninjago seabound#ninjago nya#nya smith#ninjago kai#kai smith#ninjago jay#jay walker#ninjago cole#cole brookstone#ninjago zane#zane julien#ninjago pixal#pixal borg#ninjago maya#maya smith#ninjago ray#ray smith#spoilers#wojira#ninjago misako
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Confused about which house system to pick? Make it Personal.
The one thing, that makes relating to a house system in Astrology easy is our personal experience. It's good to know something in theory, but it's best to live through it in practice.
I went through several transformations in perception of my own chart, from Placidus to Whole Signs in Western to Vedic, and the reason why these transformations occur, is that something felt more relatable to me every time I changed my preference in house systems. There is always this one placement or two, that defines your perception of yourself, and if it doesn't quite sit right, it will become obvious to you the moment you open yourself up to a new house system, and you see another placement, that rings more true than the one you used before.
Tldr; compare all those 3 charts, and see which placements fit best. I encourage you to read under the cut, because I'm expanding on that idea there, using practical examples and more details.
In Placidus, the source of discomfort for me was my Saturn and Jupiter placement. Placidus gave me a 3rd house Saturn, and I could never quite relate to this energy. I'm an intuitive astrologer, so I can "feel" placements that are not mine, but I couldn't link the experience of this placement to myself, I didn't feel "heavy" enough in this area the way Saturn must feel for people there. Same with Jupiter in 11th, I was always confused, because 11th house energy is not something I would relate with myself that strongly, seeing people who actually have it in their charts.
Then I switched to Whole Signs, and Saturn in 4th and Jupiter in 12th clicked for me immediately. Especially Saturn in the 4th hit heavy with my upbringing, and I knew I could never go back to Placidus again. Having a trine in Moksha houses (Ketu in 8th, Saturn in 4th, Jupiter in 12th) is one of the fundamentals of my life and work, the reason I was unhappy in traditional jobs, and why I find so much fulfillment as an astrologer instead.
That is something I recommend also for you, to look at Saturn's influence if the houses change between house systems, because the weight of Saturn is so significant, it will be a key factor in letting you truly understand the karmic responsibility placed upon you in your life. You just can't pass Saturn by, and when you have to instinctively choose between two houses, you will know which one resonates. Just make sure, you understand the meaning of the houses themselves well.
When you switch to your Vedic/Sidereal chart, changes depend on your degrees, so sometimes very little to nothing may change, but sometimes a lot of the signs do. For me, the key difference was not even the change in the signs, and I already wrote about this experience here, but the change in the houses. My rising changed from Scorpio to Libra, but my Moon and Mars stayed in Cancer, so they switched houses from 9th to 10th, and that was my final "a-ha" moment when it came to my chart.
The Moon is such a basic, definitional element of our psyche, and I could never put my finger on being a 9th house Moon. Of course, my empathy can extend to that placement as much as any other one, but again, I didn't feel it on a personal level as much as I should have. Then I studied my Vedic Chart, and not only did I not have a single 9th house planet, but also my 9th house in general has the lowest Ashtakavarga score in my whole chart, an extremely weak one in general in fact. I would say it is still the house in the whole zodiac I intuitively "feel" the least.
It makes so much more sense, if you study basic 9th house topics. Getting my university degree was a pain through and through. I cried many tears, doing it mostly out of obligation, and hating most of the experience. I spent most of these years alone, didn't make a single friend, and always felt out of place and insufficient in my achievements, while I was always a top student before that, 3rd house Venus giving me a better time in early education. I always felt, like I learned best in solitude, maybe in one-on-one situations with a partner, never had any figure in public to coach me, or be my "guru", any inspiration from another person always came to me on a more private level. If you google search a basic list of 9th house topics, many of them were simply not present in my life at all - for example, 9th house can represent a brother or sister in law, and every single person I ever dated was always an only child, or at least at a serious distance from their siblings, so as a result I had zero perspectives for a brother-or-sister in law. I bet that when I get into my next relationship, it will also pan out the same way. 9th house can also represent an advantage, that comes with family, giving you a certain "lucky edge", a unique form of shelter and emotional protection, and I never had any of that, having to work for everything on my own, my family being a source of challenges to overcome more than anything else. Funny part about the 9th house benefit is, it doesn't necessarily relate to material wealth, but rather to your perception of feeling "karmically cushioned". I have seen people with a weak 9th house have affluent parents, but be miserable with their caregivers anyway. My ex has Venus conjunct Mars in the 9th, and while their family relations are not perfect, it shocked me to see how they were well provided for on all fronts on a physical level, and how there was an element of karmic protection coming from their parents, that I never experienced myself. They themselves took it for granted, but the contrast for me was eye opening, seeing how their parents would always come to help them in a pinch.
When I started to identify with the 10th house instead, I just knew immediately it was the right fit, lining up perfectly with my needs and ambitions, and the directional strength I always had with Moon conjunct Mars in the 10th.
I encourage you to use my example, compare all 3 charts for yourself and see what "fits" best. Open your mind, and you might surprise yourself. Everyone I know fits their Vedic personality profile the most, and if they don't relate to it, it's because they don't understand Vedic Astrology or their birth Nakshatras enough yet.
#making spirituality real#astrology#vedic astrology#whole signs#placidus#sidereal#sidereal astrology#vedic#sidereal zodiac#tropical#tropical astrology#western astrology#astro observations#zodiac signs#natal chart#zodiac#birth chart#horoscope#moon sign#sun sign
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Too Daze Gone (Joe x Reader)
(Happy birthday to me! You’re all going to suffer. This is a little something that I wrote over 2 1/2 years ago based on a concept that I thought of three years ago; one of the first ideas I ever had for a Def Leppard fanfic. I made some very minor edits to it ((since I’m not 17 anymore)), and honestly, this is still one of my favorite things that I’ve ever written. But I know you guys are gonna have my head for it later...)
Prompt: It’s December of 1989. You and Joe are recently married, the world has now officially entered the post-Hysteria era, and- well...
-----
December 1989
The soft morning sunlight was seeping through the plane’s window right next to you. Joe’s head was resting on your arm, and you used your opposite hand to stroke his hair soothingly. He had one hand on his stomach, along with his green eyes closed and shut away from the world. The plane was flying steadily now, but your minds were anything but steady at the moment. There was so much to say, but no place or time to say it. It was almost as if you two were having a telepathic conversation; there was so much thinking between you both, yet nothing was being said.
“You alright, Joe?” the voice of a London guitarist broke your attention from the window. He’d strolled over to the seats where you and the man in question were sitting, and let his concern get the better of him.
There was far too much concern going around today, so Phil's question was rather unnecessary.
“Oh, he’s fine,” you answered sweetly, knowing that Joe didn’t want to answer, and also not wanting to give Phil any hint to your invisible nerves, “He’s just feeling rather sick is all.”
Phil sighed, “Ah, yeah, the turbulence wasn't the greatest.”
You decided to go along with Phil’s theory of why Joe wasn’t feeling well. After all, it was believable.
“Yeah, we haven’t been awake that long, either. You know how he can be in the morning. He’s just sick of the day, really,” you lightly joked. Today was not necessarily a good day for jokes. There was a deep, underlying sadness beneath the surface of everybody's tone no matter how much they joked around.
“Oh, so he’s got morning sickness, I see?” Phil joked along, trying to lighten the universally tense mood, “Well, congratulations on the pregnancy, Joe.”
Your heart jumped and you forced a chuckle at the statement. You felt Joe’s heart jump, too.
“Thanks, Phil,” Joe cracked a gentle smile for him as he walked away. You could feel how forced the smile was as Joe slowly reached out and squeezed your hand. He was definitely more worried than you.
“Shh, I know. I’m worried, too,” you whispered to him so quietly that you could barely hear yourself, “But we’ll deal with this later.”
~18 hours earlier~
You weaved your hands together with the utmost anxiety as you waited for Joe to get back from a small trip to the supermarket. As you waited, there was no stopping the racing thoughts in your mind. Once one thought appeared and rooted itself within you, it was impossible to keep it from rolling into a snowball of others. It was driving you absolutely mad on the inside. Keeping calm on the outside, however, came rather easily. It almost felt like second nature at the moment. Of course, you knew that was all going to change the second Joe got back.
Everything was going to change the second Joe got back.
When he did come back, you immediately stood up and went over to him, trying to be casual and lighthearted.
"Hey! How was the store?" came the greeting from you. Your voice was nearly on the verge of breaking from the tension of the whole situation.
"A fucking treat," he grumbled sarcastically, putting four bags down on the table, "The whole bloody place was packed, the service was piss poor, traffic on the way back, you name it."
You kissed him on the cheek for a few seconds in consolation, quickly making his small dimple appear as a result. Normally, it melted your heart to see him smile, but this time, it made it almost vibrate with worry. It hurt to see him happy now, since you knew it wouldn't last long.
He turned and put his hands on your waist, "I suppose it was worth it to get back to you, though."
You wrapped your arms around his neck, quickly pecked him on the lips, telling him, "You're too kind. Now let's see what you've looted up on-"
Desperate to distract both of you from each other, you turned to the grocery bags and started to pull the items out. You did it in a sped-up manner to keep your hands from shaking too visibly. You had no idea when to mention what had to be mentioned.
"I'll tell you what," Joe spoke up, his annoyance still audible in his voice, "The service down there was so fucking slow. Took me a half hour to get four bloody bags worth."
"I'll say you took a while," you impulsively decided to create a segue- any segue- that may get you closer to your fated subject. You blurted out "You’re late."
As he continued pulling out the groceries, he cocked an eyebrow, and asked without looking at you, "What do you mean I’m late?"
"Just, you're late, that's all," you shrugged, the anxiety overwhelming you more. It was getting close to the subject now.
"I'm not late," he chuckled, still not looking up or fully understanding you. You both often liked to joke and tease each other, so this wasn’t anything strange to him.
"No," you stated calmly, going completely motionless with fear, “But I am."
He didn't completely comprehend what you had said. He began to put away the groceries and asked you obliviously, "What do you mean you're late?" Late for what?"
You pressed on, remaining rooted to a motionless state and staring at him, "No, Joe... I’m late."
"You mean that this month you didn't get your-" he started off normally, but then paused as the penny dropped. He froze, and dropped the can he was holding. Your heart sank in your chest at his reaction. Now was the time to talk about it, and you could sense it wasn't going to be pleasant. Part of you began to think that this is how it might end for you two.
He turned around, looking almost mortified and whispered, "Oh my god... are you...?"
"I don't know..." you were shaking now, "I'm just assuming."
For a moment you both stood there, staring at each other, lost for words.
Another impulse suddenly arose within you, and you blurted out again with a wavering and worried voice, "I-I hope I'm not, Joe, and I know you don't want me to be, either, because now is not a good time for this to be happening! You’re at the peak of your career, and we’ve got the new album on the way, then you'll be on tour again- and-"
"Hey, hey, shh," Joe moved forward and put his hands on your arms, "Calm down... it's okay, it's okay. First of all, who ever said I didn't want this? You can't just assume that I wouldn't be okay with it... and I'm not mad- really, I swear! Second of all, this isn't set in stone yet. We'll have to find out if you are first, and if you are, we'll... then we'll make it work out somehow. Don’t think too much just yet; try to relax.”
You blew out a shaky exhale and muttered, “Yeah, okay...”
“Have you been sick?"
"No, but something just feels... off."
"How late are you?"
"About a week..."
"Have you been this late in the past, but gotten your period anyway?"
"Yes..."
"Then we don't know for sure," he kissed the top of your head, embracing you and reassuring, “So what if you're late? That doesn't have to mean anything! I'm worried, too, but we can't just jump to conclusions like this. I wouldn't even put the stakes at 50-50 right now. All this worrying is probably over nothing. You could just be overthinking."
You turned your head and attempted to look up at him to say, "But this is a child, Joe... if there's even a small possibility that this child exists, we've got to assume that it does... we can't just ignore it for too long."
"You've got a point, you've got a point, but just for a second, genuinely consider the possibility that you're not-" he didn't dare say the “p” word, "-you know..."
You sighed into his shoulder, fighting back against tears that wanted to fall, "Okay, okay, you could be right, but there's so much that might have to be done- we can't just put this off..."
"We can until we know for sure," he suggested, "If it's worrying you so much right now, then I'll run out to the corner store and pick up a test. We can sort this out once and for all. How long did you wanna wait before taking a test?"
"I don't know, I don't know," came the drawn out reply as a few tears spilled from you, "Maybe a day or two or three, but I'm just getting so worried that it might be true, I can't wait anymore."
"Okay, then you won't have to wait anymore," he tilted your chin up to give you a quick and thoughtful kiss, then wiped away your tears, "I'll run to the store quick and buy us a test. Is that okay?"
"Yes, please just do it. I'm sorry- you just got back from the store and-"
He laughed and squeezed you tighter, swaying with you in his arms, "Ah, don't worry about it; it's a necessary trip now."
"You're taking this a lot better than I thought you would."
"What'd you think I was gonna do? Leave you?" he chuckled lightheartedly, though he guessed exactly what you were thinking.
You faked a chuckle in reply, "Yeah, kinda... I had a lot of time to overthink everything."
"Well, would you leave me? Especially if I were in your shoes?"
It was your turn to squeeze him tighter (and laugh into his chest), "Joe, if you were in my shoes, I think we'd have a real problem."
"Oh, I know, I know- but apart from that- would you leave me?"
"Of course not..."
"Exactly. You wouldn't leave me, so I definitely won't leave you. You know we've always looked after each other, and I still plan on holding up my end of the bargain."
He kissed you again, longer this time, before softly assuring you, “I love you. Don't ever think that I’d abandon you to raise a child on your own, cos' it'll never ever be a possibility. I'll be here no matter what. Positive or negative."
***
Positive or negative, indeed, you told yourself as you wearily gazed out of the plane's window. You still weren't completely sure how to feel about the outcome of the previous day, but- as you told Joe before- you had to deal with it later. There were more pressing matters currently at hand. Your previous issue could wait for an extra day or two. The more serious problem that you all were on your way to currently needed the most attention. This particular problem also seemed to outline a theme for the past 24 hours; accidental life or accidental death.
~17 hours earlier~
You both sat on the bathroom floor in quiet anxiety. Your hands were joined in a world of worry. At the moment, it was impossible to tell who was more worried, since neither of you could bring yourselves to speak.
The longest two minutes of your lives were currently taking place. The test was sitting on the counter of the sink, and neither of you were counting down to when you could look at it again. Every now and then, a reassuring thought would come to mind that you were all worked up over nothing. After all, Joe was right; you barely had any evidence other than the fact that you were late, so you couldn't just assume the worst. On the other hand though, you couldn't help but feel that there was some impending doom about to come, almost like you felt it instinctively.
With you both being scared shitless at the moment (and not even trying to hide it), you sensed that deep down, both of you knew what the result was going to be. Neither of you wanted to admit it, though.
A few rooms away, the phone suddenly sounded off, shattering the tension and making you both jump. It was almost like a form of divine intervention to prevent you from thinking any more. Almost immediately, Joe lifted his hand away and quietly said that he'd answer it. He stood up and left, leaving you alone with a possibly huge revelation sitting on the counter a few feet away. However, that would no longer be your biggest concern, for you could easily overhear Joe talking on the phone.
"'Ello?" he answered before pausing and replying anxiously, "No, I really don't have a minute... I can't say, but I don't have time to chat. You alright, mate?”
There was an unnerving pause before you heard Joe ask, "Why?"
There was an even longer pause before he spoke again. Your heart was pounding more. That gut feeling that your lives were about to change for the worse grew enormously without warning. On top of that, you suddenly realized that it had been well over two minutes at this point. Your future awaited you now.
"Fuck... oh my god..." Joe's voice was a lot more quiet now, "...oh my god, is he...?"
Now, you began weaving your hands together, slowly growing more and more impatient and worried.
"Dammit," Joe said a little louder, "We'll we've gotta go, then. We've gotta go as soon as possible. What about Rick and Sav...? Alright, then. We'll meet you there tomorrow morning- I've really gotta go and tell Y/N right now. I'll call you in a bit. Yeah, alright... just try and calm down, mate- okay? See ya, then."
As soon as he hung up, you heard him rush back to the bathroom.
"Y/N, he huffed before he was even in the room, "Y/N, something's happened and we’ve gotta-“
He froze in the doorway upon seeing you now standing and completely covering the test in your hands.
"No," he moved forward and put a hand on yours, "Please don't look at it yet; something awful's happened and I don't know how much sudden news we can take at this point. Did you look at it?”
You shook you head, not breaking eye contact with him, "No, but now I'm too scared to take my hands off. What's happened?"
He came right out with it, "Steve's been found unconscious at a bar in Minneapolis. They took him to a hospital, he’s in intensive care and... and he’s pretty bad.”
Right then and there, you dropped the test in your hands with a gasp. You were speechless, but part of you couldn't help but ask, "Is- is he gonna make it?”
You suddenly saw tears in Joe's eyes when he answered, "I don't know... he won't die unless we knock some fucking sense into him! That was Phil who just called, and he sounded scared shitless..."
"W-well what are we gonna do? Is anyone going to see Steve?"
"We are. Tomorrow morning we're flying out with Phil, Mutt, Tony, and Peter."
"Wait, what about Rick and Sav?"
"They both can't make it on short notice. We're gonna have to give Steve a beatin’ over the head from them.”
Just like that, you forgot all about the test on the floor. Steve was dying, and that was enough to flood your mind. You wanted to cry, you wanted to hug Joe, you wanted to scream, and most of all, you wanted to see Steve and sob your brains out to him.
"He's never gonna get better, is he?" you quietly asked, not particularly looking for an answer. Joe shrugged and sighed, running his hands through his hair.
He coldly chuckled in a quiet voice, "Not unless we keep drilling it into his head that he's gonna kill himself!"
Hanging your head out of astonishment, you sat on the counter, realizing that this was the biggest blow to your lives since Rick’s accident.
At least, it would be until you saw the result of the test on the floor.
"Joe..." you whispered to him, staring down at your hands, "Should we look at the test? Should we wait until we get back?"
Joe did nothing more than stare at you, frowning nervously. He moved his own hands forward, placed them on top of yours, and took a deep breath.
“We’re only gonna be more worried if we wait... so we might as well settle things now.”
Joe slowly got on his knees, and felt on the floor for the test without looking at it. When he located it, he rose back to his feet, and brought the test forward. He kept it covered with all his fingers wrapped around it to conceal the verdict.
Blowing out a trembling breath, you looked at him as he did at you, and he gently unfolded his fingers from the test. You both simultaneously looked down to see the clearly marked result. In that second, you were fairly certain that life would never be the same.
In fact, you were positive.
***
“Now is literally the worst possible time to talk about this, Joe,” you whispered again so no one else on the plane could hear, “It can wait a day or two. We’ve got to worry about Steve first."
Joe nodded a little, agreeing with you, “Okay, I suppose it can wait.”
“Don't stress yourself out so much; it's literally making you sick. Besides, I’m the one who’s supposed to be sick,” you chuckled, “That’s not your job.”
“Oh shut up,” he laughed a little, “It really is the turbulence… and the fact that Steve’s… and you’re… and I’m surprised you’re not this overwhelmed.”
You sighed and turned your head towards the window, “Yeah... I’m really surprised, too. This is gonna be one hell of a story to tell this kid when they’ve grown up...”
“I feel sorry that their story had to start out like this,” Joe put another hand on top of your already joined hands with a guilty exhale, “With such bad timing...”
As you watched the illuminated clouds move on by the window of the plane, you couldn’t help but think that things truly would be okay at one point: like that maybe this wouldn’t be such bad timing after all. Things would all work out eventually. How far away that merciful checkpoint was, you’d never be able to guess.
***
Later that day, you found yourself sitting in a circle of people in a rather pleasant-looking and sunlit room. For such a nice day that it was, nothing about the day seemed to fit the mood the weather provided; the universe simply wouldn’t allow it. Now was the time for the serious matter you came for; you were desperately trying to help Steve.
“Steve, you’re scaring the shit out of us,” Phil read bluntly from his letter to his best friend, trying not to let soft emotion seep into his tone. He knew he needed to be stern, but caring towards him.
The whole time he spoke, you wanted to devote all of your attention to him and Steve, but soon found that you couldn't. The constant thought of your unborn child was first on your mind, and although you didn’t want that taking over your thoughts, it was beginning to eat you alive. You almost felt like you couldn't hold the secret back any longer, despite only knowing for a day. In any other circumstances, it would have been so much easier to keep it secret. Today, however, was the worst possible day, with the worst possible scenario.
Every now and then, Joe would look over at you to see how you were doing, and turn back to not be conspicuous to everyone else. You could practically sense his growing worry. Going on in this manner for so long was starting to make your own unstoppable thoughts bubble to the surface. You couldn't hold out for much longer, and was even starting to think outside the box about your while situation. Was being with child really a problem? Did it have to be a bad thing right now? Could you actually find a way to rip some positivity from it all and shed some light on this situation?
That's when it hit you.
When Phil was done his speech, some silent tears were shed by everyone in the circle (including Steve). Near silence commenced afterwards (which only reminded you that there was no distraction from your thoughts now). You reached out to Joe slowly, and took his hand in a tight grip without looking at him. While you felt his eyes on you, you didn't dare look at him.
"Has anyone else got something to say to add onto that?" Peter softly asked, looking around the circle. Your heart began to pound; an opening for you was coming.
Phil slowly began to comment, looking at his feet, "Well, there's nothing I can say to get the point across any more. We can beg and plead all we want but the point still stands, Steve. I know you're not a fan of us guilt tripping you to hell- but we don't want to beat you up; that’s not what we came here to do. We love you, mate... so it doesn't matter whether or not we guilt trip you by saying we're worried sick, or- or..."
"I'm pregnant," you stated simply, closing your eyes and squeezing Joe's hand. While you didn't see it, you felt Joe inhale and look at you instinctively. For the single day that you were aware of your condition, you and Joe had feared the "p" word, and avoided using it at all costs.
Phil didn't entirely comprehend what you said, and kept talking on, "Exactly, even if we said that-"
"No-" you sat up in your seat and opened your eyes, now shaking again, "I mean... I'm pregnant."
You looked over at Joe, who seemed tired, yet understanding. Your eyes went down to his hand as you corrected yourself, "We're pregnant."
All eyes were on you now, but no one had any inclination to speak for a moment.
“Are you serious?” Mutt broke the silence in astonishment, “You're fucking with us right now, aren't you?"
“She’s not,” Joe shook his head, still fixing his loving eyes on you.
Steve looked at Phil and stated coldly, "I thought you said you guys weren't gonna make stuff up to guilt trip me."
"Does it look like I'm making this up?!" you snapped at him, anxious and shameful tears brimming your eyes. You looked around at everyone, landing your eyes on Steve.
"So you're serious?” he asked softly, frowning as he flicked off ashes from his cigarette, “You really are pregnant?”
You nodded, trying to hold yourself together.
“When did you find out?” Peter inquired gently, coming off as the most calm member of the group.
Your voice began to break as you told him with a sad chuckle, “Yesterday... we were waiting for the result of the test right when you called, Phil...”
Phil's eyes lit up at your statement, and he apologized, "Oh- fucking hell... Joe... you even said you didn't have time to talk... and what I said on the plane this morning- must've only made things worse... guys, I'm so sor-"
"That wasn't your fault, mate," Joe smiled sadly, "There's no way you could've known."
"It was just bad timing," you stared at Joe's hand in yours, feeling him shaking as well.
No one spoke for a while after that; no one could think of the right thing to say. It seems you both had scared them all into silence (even more than Steve had). Everyone in the circle couldn't speak because they no longer saw you and Joe the same way. A minute ago, you were still Y/N and Joe. Now, you were mum and dad. The others didn't know how to speak to those strange new people just yet.
“Well, congratulations, for one thing,” Tony broke the silence with a soft smile. A few muffled chuckles and agreements went around the circle, but it wasn’t what you or Joe wanted to hear.
“No, no, that’s not the point,” you threw your hands out in frustration, “We never even planned on telling anyone today! Don’t you guys see how suddenly life can come and go? Twenty-four hours ago Joe and I didn’t even have a child, and now we do. Twenty-four hours ago, we didn’t even think that there was a possibility of you dying-“ you pointed at Steve, giving him your own furious input, “-and now there is. It’s just all so surreal, but no matter how bad the timing of your life is, there’s always time to fight for survival. And that's exactly what we need to get a grip on right now.”
Steve put out his cigarette at this point, looking as if he were genuinely listening to you now more than ever.
“And I guess timing was a real bitch to us today,” you put a hand on your abdomen for the first time since you found out, addressing Steve directly, “But I’d say now you’ve got a little bit more to fight for. Just think about this whole situation; it’s not exactly a tale to be proud of. If this story keeps getting worse, and this is how it ends for you- I don’t want that to be the story of Uncle Steve. I want our child to be born into a world where you're thriving- where they... where they actually have an Uncle Steve."
You had hit a nerve (or a soft spot, to say the least). Before you even realized exactly what you had said, everyone in the circle was crying, including you and Steve. Joe looked at you with his face smothered in tears, but smiling, no less.
The seven of you remained like that for a minute or two, absorbing what had really hit everyone hard, and quietly crying your brains out.
Steve didn’t raise his head to ask you with heartfelt astonishment, “...Uncle Steve, really?”
“C’mere, you fucking idiot,” you sprang to your feet at one point and rushed over to him, taking him in your arms as he stood to take you in his without the slightest bit of hesitation.
“I love you so much, Steve,” you sobbed into his chest, “And I will always care about you. You mean so much to me, and I know you’ll mean so much to the baby, too.”
One by one, everyone else in the circle joined in the hug, each of them murmuring their love to Steve in their own affectionate way. Once you were all broken up, Joe embraced you himself and kissed you over and over again.
“Hey, back off from her,” Mutt teased, “Haven’t you done enough?”
“I still can’t believe you knocked her up,” Phil sighed with happy disbelief, “That’s something we only ever joked about!”
“Yeah well, it doesn’t have to be seen as a joke anymore,” Joe put his hands on your hips and smiled, tearing up all over again, “I’m gonna be a dad...!”
Peter chimed in, “Now that’s a bit scary.”
“It’s not scary,” you chuckled, stroking the back of Joe’s head, “It’s exciting! Timing is a bitch... but I think I’m ready for anything time can throw at me, now.”
Reaching that point of acceptance was a day-long journey that you thought would never have a final destination. All was nearly well in that moment where you and Joe hugged with a seemingly-changed Steve standing by. Right then and there, the future seemed bright for everyone; including your unborn child. An eternity went by in those two days you were gone for, and even though the next day you found out that your test result was a false positive, and Steve only lived for about another year, that false positive seemed to be just what you all needed to keep the world at bay.
The end
#*dances with an umbrella as your tears rain down on me* :3DD#your tears are the best birthday presents i could ask for#def leppard#def leppard fanfic#def leppard x reader#joe elliott x reader#original content#i honestly don't know if I'll ever write anything that can top this as far as a one shot goes#phil collen#steve clark#peter mensch#mutt lange#i thought of this when I was into Leppard for like 2 months#maybe less than that#also the pic of joe on the right really makes me fEEL THINGS#yes i stole the title of this from a Billy Squier song#i started writing this on august 13th 2018 and finished it on december 9th 2018#I wanted to post this in december 2020 but I was taking a hiatus
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Why yellow is the color of originality in the Karate Kid Universe
This is the part III of a post called "Color Theory in the Karate Kid Universe"
Alright, I really didn't expect to be doing a third part of this color thing, in fact, it was all supposed to be one post, but the more I write the more ideas come to my mind, and the more I watch, the more I realise new things, so I'll be analysing the color yellow and its meaning in Karate Kid and Cobra Kai.
First Impressions
The first time that we see yellow with a certain signifance is in a shirt Daniel is wearing under a blue flannel, in that same day he washes Mr. Miyagi's cars for the first time, and later in the movie he gets the first car he washed as a birthday gift, so it might not seem so important, after all the first apperance of the color is only the 50th minute of the movie.
But when we look at Cobra Kai, we see it appear way more. Starting by the oppening title.
Gangs
As the red and blue, I think it's another way to shows teams, and who is with whom. On episode two of season one, we have the oppening title yellow, with a red background, and when Miguel goes to school he's wearing a "shy" red, which is basically a dark red, with a grey shirt under it, meaning he's unconfortable and wants to blend in. When he sits with Demitri and Eli (binary brothers... Sorry couldn't contain myself) they are dressed in yellow tones, espeacially Demitri, which I think means they're both in the same side. Yasmine is also wearing yellow, and it's almost the same yellow that Demetri is, which I think could be a clue for the fact that they would be together later. Samantha is wearing blue though, and so is Kyler, who is wearing white too, but he has a black hat, which could be refrence to him being a bad person in the mind, or just a refrence to Johnny as I metioned in the first part.
When I first started thinking about this, I thought that yellow was Miguel's color, here's why:
He wears it A LOT, definetly more than the other characters, but when I was looking for these images, I realised that from S2E3 to S3E4, he didn't wear yellow at all, he mostly wore red (which shows the influence that Johnny has on him), sometimes blue (which shows that he's not completly Johnny) and he also wore a lot of black (which shows Kreese's influence, even though he was the student that bought Kreese's act the least, he still listened to him.)
Not to mention the fact that in season 1 episode 7, he takes Johnny's advice and acts like him, while Johnny takes Miguel's advice and does things his way, which is shown in their clothes (last picture above), and at first it seemed to me that yellow is Miguel's way of doing things, since red is Johnny's.
Originality
Untill that moment I was really confused, 'cause I saw some other characters such as Hawk, Tory, Robby and even Armand waering it, but not Miguel, I couldn't see a pattern at that point, but there were two scenes that made it very clear.
On the episode five of the third season, right after Johnny's trials of making Miguel walk again fails, he's wearing yellow, but after the concert where he moves his foot, he's back with red and black, until eight episode of the same season, Miguel wears yellow again, right after fighting with Johnny, and that was the thing that caught my attention. Whenever Miguel wasn't quite on Johnny's side, or anyone else's he wore yellow, but still I thought that that was his color.
The thing that really made me see it, was with Hawk. In the episode nine of season three he wears yellow, they go to the zoo to steal the snake, and he ends up seen as "not so cool" since Robby was the one that got it, after that he goes to Daniel's house to beggin what would be the big fight of the season, and he's wearing a red jacket, to show strength, but inside he's still wearing yellow, which means he still has some Eli inside, and that makes yellow the color of orginality, it's when you're being truly yourself.
As you can see in Tory's example, she's at home, so she's totally "comfortable", or at least she's not trying to show anyone anything, and Armand is completly comfortable, after all he doesn't have any manners when eating. But what about Sam and Robby?
Feeling lost
Here's when I noticed that things weren't that simple, in Sam's case, she wears yellow right after seeing Kyler being a bully, so she's confused. Robby is clearly confused, after all he starts the scene not wanting anything to do with his father, then accepts his help, but soon gets mad at him. Hawk doesn't wear it because he's confident enough, that was right after he started realising what he was becoming, we see that throughout the whole season, but he's still resisting, he still wants to stay in that "cool" position, we see that as he tries to hide the "Eli he has inside" by wearing a red jacket.
I think that yellow is only the color of originality for characters who haven't found who they truly are yet. If we look back at the Red vs. Blue thing, we'll see that not only red means more ofense, and blue means more defense, but blue is Daniel's true self, and red is Johnny's true self, of course that they wear different colors some times to show the things I said, but not only things usually doesn't go that well, but they act differently then the usual, so Johnny's originality is red, and Daniel's is blue, but these other character don't know yet.
The logo
That's why I think that Cobra Kai chose yellow to be the title color, this show is telling us, that this rivality is makes no sense, and the new characters are trying to find their own identities, even if they use the help of pre-existing concepts, they still gotta search for themselves.
Now, you may say that this is all bullshit, and the only reason for the show to have the title yellow is because the Cobra Kai original logo is yellow, but I disagree, because at the end of every episode we see a dark silver Cobra Kai logo instead of the yellow, black and red one, which I think means the new perspective Johnny is about to discover: Cobra Kai is very dark, and bad in general.
As I've said before, this is all just theories and I would love to hear the opinion of people who disagree.
Peace! :)
#Cobra kai#johnny lawrence#daniel larusso#john kreese#miguel diaz#the hawk#samantha larusso#tory#The Karate Kid
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