Tumgik
#but i like being in the same room as other ppl even if im doing a non social activity like reading its just nice to have company
puppyeared · 1 month
Text
Atla live action 😐
#thats my honest reaction 😐#to be fair ive only seen 20 minutes of the s1 finale bc my parents are watching it but. mmmmm kinda mid#like. the casting is definitely an improvement since the last time they tried a live action but it feels like the writing falls flat#or maybe im being harsh bc ive only heard negative criticism on it beforehand. but fr anytime u bring up the original its already#good and not just because its the original. so much fucking detail went into it to the point of someone noticing azula wielding mai's knive#to how well thought out irohs character is used as a way of uniting the cast especially as zukos foil#i heard that sokkas sexism was toned down and i have to agree that feels like a cheap move. like i get WHY they think it would be better#but its not about how that reflects on real world its about how it affects the story. sokka starts out as a misogynistic asshole because#it makes it that much more impactful when he changes. toning that down makes it flatter and makes his character development weak#and someone pointed out they didnt even make him wear the kyoshi warrior uniform and i know it feels like such a small detail but#come on man. they did that in the original because not only does it help him really walk in their shoes - wearing 'feminine' clothing and#makeup and having suki explain its significance but it also ties in with the shows theme of harmony and intersectionality#i was also disappointed when they had the fire sages explain how the water tribe draws power from the moon because in the original it was#IROH who explained it to aang and everyone else BECAUSE we as the audience is under the impression hes with the 'bad guys'#and it builds up to how he learned from the other nations which reconciles his past as a war general and his character overall#AND its an excellent starting point for the cast and audience to understand how the nations arent as closed off as you would think#plus you would think its only fire nation doing propaganda but they expanded on that with earth kingdom censorship and it WORKS#a lot of things in the live action also feel arbitrary like. they gave momo a near death experience for 5 minutes for no reason#im firmly on the stance of bringing back filler moments instead of putting major events right after each other so that u give your#audience a sense of time passing and to really absorb the story. but i think thats more like shock value than filler and yeah its a small#thing to gripe about but those things build up and its really annoying. the thing abt avatar filler moments is that however small#its at least meaningful. hell even the beach episode emphasizes how isolated zuko and his friends are as child soldiers#i also swore to never watch the first live action since it was that bad but i really liked the stylized tattoos they used for aang#anyway. those arejust my thoughts. im not gonna watch the rest because im a ride or die for the original aftr growing up and#rewatching it at least 20 times as a kid. but theres definitely room for improvement and i wish ppl wouldnt take it as 'better' just cuz#netflix is adapting it. i wouldve killed for them to just reanimate the entire avatar series and touch NOTHING ELSE no redub#no changes to the story. just reanimate the thing and leave the rest alone and youd make easy money just the same#ALSO its very jarring not hearing jack desena and dante basco voicing sokka and zuko cause their voices were the most recognizable to me#i get that its because its live action but im allowed to feel a little sad abt that. and uncle irohs accent was really soothing#yapping
45 notes · View notes
opens-up-4-nobody · 30 days
Text
...
#sorry im thinking abt death again#because it's weird to think that ive been in the room. maybe a meter away from someone as they died#that someone being my mom. its just weird. the time in the hospital feels like it happened in some dark little pocket universe detached from#time. a calm room and then the soft blips of a monitor then the nurse rushing in to say she'd passed#i dont kno y ppl use that phrase: passed on. i mean i do. it softens the topic. makes it sound peaceful. ive yet to use it. i just say she#died bc thats what happened. is that insensitive? i dunno. when i was home i realized that i come off as much stranger than i think. the way#my family see me doesnt fit how i see myself. i dont kno what to do with that. i dunno. theyre all together today#for an early easter. and im halfway across the country again. nose so stuffy ive had to mouth breathe for the last 3 days#and again. everything feels the same as it did before but also profoundly different. sometimes i cry in the mornings. or when i think abt#future vacations she wont be there for. bc in the end she quickly slipped away in a way that couldn't be described as peaceful until her#last half a day. and all i can think about in that tiny room is how scary it would be to lose control like that#and how its not fair and she didnt deserve to die only halfway through a lifetime. but its not about fair and its not about deserving.#sometimes bad things just happen. that's life. and now i own a book called motherless daughters. and now im standing with the countless#others who've lost their moms too early. ive already become aware of 3 ppl in my daily life who are in the same club#i keep thinking about this moment that happened between my parents at the hospital. apparently my dad was helping her get cleaned up and her#stomach was so bloated she looked like she had a bby in there. which my dad said. and my mom apparently said: but it's a baby no one want. i#dont kno y that upsets me so much. all the things i heard abt her being in the hospital before i got there upset me. and the rest of my#family was there to see it. so i have the least traumatic version of the story. and i got almost 27 years with her. except my sisters#probably got more time with her bc i spent so much time away. or maybe not. i dunno.#i dunno. im just sad that shes gone and sad that it was drawn out even a little bit. 6 days isnt long but im sure it felt like an eternity.#again not fair. nothings fair. 53 years of unfairness culminating in a tragedy. she would hate me characterizing it like that. she lived a#full life as they say. full with an asterisk on account of length#unrelated
13 notes · View notes
pepprs · 8 months
Text
just went thru all of the notes on that post and like. YEAH. it’s a fucking wonder. like i should get to scream. i should get to lie down. i should get to have as many treats as i want for free.
#purrs#menstruation tw#literally so tmi but the pain + digestive issues + constant paranoia abt leaking + pain + exhaustion because of blood loss + exhaustion beca#because of sleep deprivation because of pain + pain + discomfort + the mortifying ordeal of leaving the room with your purse or taking out a#heating pad and everyone knows why + being in situations where you CANT use a heating pad because you have to walk somewhere or meet in a di#different place + pain + the fact that i can’t just reschedule shit when im dealing with it and can’t schedule around it and there aren’t#social structures in place to make it easy to do that + the fact that you aren’t supposed to talk about it even though it is all consuming +#pain and pain and pain. and it happens EVERY MONTH and if it doesn’t happen every month then either you’re suppressing it and risking#consequences or you’re pr*gn*nt and definitely unequivocally experiencing consequences or you’re menopausal which idk what the fuck that#even does but it’s not good or you’re getting it MORE frequently because you have a condition of some kind. like. the absolute suffering and#hellfire. i don’t want to play into the stereotype of menstruating ppl being bitchy and mean and hysterical but like.. not to say it but i#GET ITCOMOLETELY. why ppl thought it was hysteria and a curse and whatever. because it is 💖 no one should ever have to experience this 💖#delete later#ask to tag#brought to you by i haven’t even finished my dinner and i had to go lie down bc im in too much pain lol 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍#* digestive issues that need to be dealt with like… posthaste except (SO TMI SORRY) i have anxiety abt um. doing that in restrooms other ppl#can go into at the same time as me so ihave to scurry down MULTIPLE flights of stairs praying that the single user bathrooms are open so i#can shit in peace 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
7 notes · View notes
willowfey · 1 year
Text
.
#i am not doing well girlies#disclaimers that i am fine i'm always fine i will always be fine but hooo boy i do not feel fine lol#everything is always overwhelming i am always sad  everything feels itchy#every single morning for weeks ive woken up with an anxiety bellyache and no matter how tired i am still i just have to get up#everyone i look up that i used to know is like. married and having babies or working their dream jobs and i just. im happy for them. i am#but where do i belong in all of this?#i know everything feels worse lately bc we're moving house and the routine changes and empty rooms feel Bad#plus my mom has not been doing well mentally which i feed off so it's just. you know#but will i ever Not feel like im so far behind? will i ever Not be deeply unsettled by even the mildest changes?#everything is so slow and so fast at the same time and it makes my head spin and we have a new friend who has a son my age and i was hoping#idk. that he'd be somewhat similar to me? falling behind a little bit too? maybe i could make a friend irl that understood a little?#but then i casually ask about him and oh no ofc he has a partner and family of his own etc etc#right. that's what i'm supposed to be doing at this age.ha#so many ppl i went to school with are married now. im turning the age this year that my mother was when she HAD me#meanwhile ive never even kissed anyone never even held a boy's hand never had any attention like that ever and#i wonder so often what it's like to be wanted by someone but ive never felt more undesirable#i cant imagine anyone looking at me and Wanting me. and at this point as romance obsessed as i am idk if i could even handle it#and the other night i was having anxiety dreams over the fact that i rly want kids but even waiting until im 30 thats only 5 years??#and 30 is already fucking five years away from being considered a GERIATRIC pregnancy?? but im not even done being a kid myself!!!!#and also who the fuck is gonna have a kid with me?? and who knows if i can even get pregnant when i rarely have a period ??#and i cant imagine not liiving with my mom and sister but does that mean i'll live with them forever??#will i be 30 35 40 45 still feeling like a kid? or worse.. will i not feel like myself at all?#will i be married to someone i dont love madly simply bc im so terrified to be alone?#or will i hold so tightly to my stories and fantasies that i will be alone bc nothing could ever live up to them?#will it even matter what i want? will anyone ever want me to even give me the option? or will this all stay hypothetical forever#im just. stressed. and i thought i'd be more by now.
2 notes · View notes
toastsnaffler · 9 months
Text
day 2 of no wifi.. hanging in there 😔😔😔😔
#its pretty ok so far tbh im not that reliant on being connected to the internet#and i have soooo much unpacking and decorating to do that im constantly busy anyway. but i miss scrolling tumblr mindlessly 😭😭#also its a bit lonely bc im used to living w 4 other ppl not 1.. and my flatmates being a bit reclusive atm#i mean we did go for a walk earlier so not that reclusive its not like i havent talked to her at all#but i like being in the same room as other ppl even if im doing a non social activity like reading its just nice to have company#so it feels reallllly quiet bc she stays in her own room all the time. which is normal for her im just. more aware of it now its just us 😭#i think shes finding the move harder than i am bc she knew our last flatmates better than me + lived there way longer than i did#and also i think most of her social life is online/over call so not having wifi means she cant rly talk to ppl as much#not that i dont have an online social life but mine is more sporadic than hers so it doesnt affect me as much#ik im not her first choice of company either... not that she doesnt like me or anything but we're not that close so#but stilllll let me sit in the corner snd hang out i can be quiet if u want me to i promise 🧍‍♀️#anyway i dooo get it if shes not feeling great#hopefully she'll adjust and find it a bit easier soon and we'll have wifi by tues anyway#and thurs im going to see family for a week so at least then ill have 24/7 nonstop company plus getting to cuddle the dog :-D#+ seeing a bunch of friends yayyy. i need to make friends in my new area too ive got a couple social groups listed to try out im excited#AND coincidentally one of my old friends works in this city too so i need to make some plans with her when im back !!#i didnt rly bother making any new friends in the last year bc i liked my flatmates enough to get my socialising in w them#but now im kinda raring for it. i do rly love meeting + getting to know new ppl just so long as its on my own terms#i.e. when i have my hearing aids in. and when its not super late in the day bc i get tired and easily overstimulated#bless my last flatmates but they were their own group + i didnt know them for enough years to be a true member tbh#itll be nice to make new friends in a situation where im not just the stray dog one of them dragged in to live with them#ok thats a little mean on myself but still. at least ill waste less time triggered by rsd now#anyway lost where i was going wow i wrote a lot of tags i doubt theyre all coherent bc its 2am im going to bed goodnighhttt xxxx#.diaries
0 notes
hannieehaee · 5 months
Text
18 + / mdi
Tumblr media Tumblr media
content: idol!mingyu x idol!reader, established relationship, jealousy, possessiveness, afab reader, smut, semi-public sex, penetrative sex, creampie, etc.
part 1
wc: 2410
a/n: ppl rlly liked my first gyu x idol!reader fic so i decided to make a pt. 2! im working on a long fic for idol!gyu x idol!reader rn (its a diff universe from this one tho hehe) which should be out this month <3
masterlist
it's been a bit hard.
dating an idol as an idol would really seem like the ideal situation, except when it wasn't.
yeah, you had been absolutely ecstatic upon finding out mingyu had been carrying a torch for you for years. you had felt the same, only ever entertaining your other friends' flirting out of mere desperation for the man to finally notice you. after he suddenly blew up, declaring his love for you, you thought it'd just be smooth sailing from here, except you hadn't really thought much past that.
maybe you were being unreasonable. i mean, you had never dated a fellow idol before! maybe it was all in your head. or maybe you just weren't too used to the dynamic just yet. you weren't too sure. but you had no idea how much longer you could take watching mingyu flirt his way through life anymore.
fans, staff, other idols, male or female, you name it. mingyu simply had an overly flirtatious demeanor towards absolutely everyone. you, personally, always kept a very clear line in fan service, or any other type of flirtatious scenarios (sans your previous attempts to make mingyu jealous). mingyu did not afford you the same courtesy, consistently following requests to call fans his girlfriends and even going as far as initiating the flirting in both fancalls and physical fan meetings. okay, maybe this was something you could put up with. these interactions were very short lived, so they never went too out of hand, but these were not his only offenses.
you looked past the flirting with idols, chalking it up to being played up for the cameras for entertainment purposes. you looked away whenever it went far enough to have fans speculating online. you knew idols were professionals at delivering fan service, always wanting to give people something to talk about. hell, you did it too! this was a bit annoying to watch, but you trusted your boyfriend and your idol colleagues, so you let it slide. it was other things that were harder to look past.
was there any need for him to flirt up a storm among all the female staff members? he was behind the scenes, for fucks sake! there were no cameras nor any benefit from entertaining their giggles and subtle touches of his muscles as they pretended to be interested in what he was saying. you knew your boyfriend probably didn't realize that he was flirting, having simply grown too used to doing it that it was second nature to him by now, but it was still frustrating! specially when no one knew that mingyu was taken. as far as any of his staff members knew, mingyu was still just your best friend, and any sighting of the two of you together (always accompanied by another member of the 97s or a fellow group mate of his to avoid suspicion) was always assumed to be strictly platonic. even now, as you walked into his dressing room, only to find his stylist - and a few of the members' stylists - flocking around him as he told some stupid joke that probably wasn't even funny.
it was sickening, really. the way none of them saw how desperate they came off. how none of them realized that if they all flirted with him at once, it truly had no effect, as he wouldn't pay special attention to any of them in particular. you felt like a hater, but being real, you were starting to become one. you watched him for a good five minutes, wondering if he'd ever notice your presence from across the room. when he did, he immediately went over to you, cutting off any of the girls who had been flirting with him in favor of welcoming you. he was amicable, giving you a simple hug. but his eyes told a different story. anyone who knew mingyu knew those eyes were reserved for his loved ones. that made you calm down a bit, even hugging him back and daring a short peck on the cheek.
today was yet another shoot at the hybe building. you had the fortune of belonging to the same company as your boyfriend, which meant you could stop by whenever you wanted (as long as you kept a low profile). you'd often drag jungkook along with you for appearances' sake, but had decided to go solo today. gyu was clearly happy to see you, interrupting his stylists to take a quick breather with you, heading over to one of the empty changing rooms and finally indulging you with less platonic affection.
"baby! wasn't expecting you today?", despite that, he was clearly enthusiastic to see you, attached to you like a magnet now that he had locked the door behind you, making sure no one was around to see his affections towards you.
"yeah, clearly ..." you couldn't help but grumble, disconnecting yourself from him.
mingyu didnt give you much of a chance to create distance between you, immediately holding onto you again, this time by wrapping his arms around your waist, yours instinctively leaning against his hard chest.
"baby, what's wrong? what do you mean?", a pout made its way to his face. of course he was unsuspecting. the mingyu you knew was far too into you to ever seriously hit on someone else when he had you.
you responded with a sigh, "mingyu, do you have to flirt with every girl you meet?"
"w-what? what are you talking about?"
"did you seriously not notice all those girls giggling at every word you said? they all want you, gyu. and you never put a stop to it."
"i dont .. the stylists? baby, ive never flirted with anyone in our staff, what? i work with them, of course i'm nice, but its always strictly platonic, you know that."
"the fact that you dont even realize it!", you separated yourself from him again, facing away and crossing your arms across your chest like a petulant child.
"baby ..."
"no, gyu. i'm not in the mood. i came to see you, but again, you're hitting on some other girl."
he wrapped his arms around you for the third time now, pulling your back to his chest as he nuzzled his face on the crook of your neck. he was trying to break you down before you even managed to get fully angry at him
"princess, i'm sorry. i swear i didnt realize i was doing it. i- im just too friendly, i guess. why would i wanna flirt with anyone when i have you right here, hmm?", the kisses he began leaving along your neck did not help matters. he knew your weak points.
"forgive me, baby? please? don't want any of them. i'll tell them. i'll tell everyone, okay?"
"gyu ..." you whined, but still angled your neck for hin to keep kissing, leaning against his hold.
"yeah, pretty? i'll tell the whole world. it's just you for me," he paused, letting out a quiet chuckle as he shook his head, "it's kinda funny, though. now you know how i felt any time the boys would flirt with you."
"gyu! how is it my fault they liked me? and i only flirted with jungkook one time before we were ever together."
"and? still hated seeing you with anyone else. you're mine. you've always been."
he turned you around then, holding you close to him as he looked into your eyes. he smiled at you, kissing your nose before chuckling at your whines of annoyance at him. even when you wanted to be mad at him you couldnt. he'd always turn the situation around and swoon you somehow.
"let me show you, baby? show you that you're mine? maybe we can show those mean mean stylists too, huh?", okay, he was just teasing you now, lips drawn way too close to yours as he ran his hands up and down your back.
"gyu ..." you whined, making no effort to actually pull away.
"you'll let me. won't you, baby?" his eyes were glued to your lips, in a similar fashion to your own. you knew he could tell how badly you wanted him to close the gap, but you refused to make the first move. then he'd win. he'd be the voice of reason, which was something you just couldn't have.
"c'mon baby, just kiss me. you know you wanna. dont you wanna show them ill all yours? maybe leave your lipstick print all over my face for them to clean up? give me a hickey to- hmph!"
you had to shut him up eventually. he was driving you crazy. but he was also right. knowing you could make a statement about your relationship without actually having to explicitly say anything about it sounded too good to pass up, so you might've gone a little extra nastier with your kissing, running your lips all over his mouth, letting your tongue do all the work for you. mingyu had no complaints, even turning pliant under your touch.
huh.
he wanted you to be jealous, didnt he? he mightve not flirted on purpose, but now that he knew you were jealous he mustve felt some type of ... pride? at knowing how badly you wanted him to be yours and yours only. well. in that case, you were gonna give it to him.
you're not sure how it happened, but you ended up sitting on him, both your shirts thrown off as you ground on his lap as he sat back on the couch. the lower part of his face, along with part of his neck, were covered in lipstick stains, matching the smudged red along your own lips. you had left a few hickeys (okay, maybe five) on his chest area, not wanting to make the stylists work too difficult. the are with most damage, however, had been his hair, as you had messed it up in all directions possible through your incessant pulling. his hairstylists might have had complaints, but mingyu sure didnt have any. he kept moaning and sighing against your lips, hands guiding your hips from the moment you sat down on him.
"baby ... give me more ... please," you didnt blame him for growing frustrated at the lack of action. you yourself felt like you were at the precipice of pleasure, just needing to sit on him to find the way to your climax.
you helped him lower his pants enough to free his cock, playing with it for a bit before allowing it to slip under your skirt, panties shoved to the side in favor of creating a safe passage for his dick. you couldnt help the loud whine of pleasure you let out at the intrusion, feeling accompanied by mingyu and his own groan.
"gyu! shit ... feel so good- so big ..."
"i know, baby ... so pretty n so tight for me ... how could i ever want anyone else when i have my pretty girl so perfect for me. hole so wet and needy ..."
you cried at his words, speeding up as you angled yourself back to allow your clit to grace against him, making your eyes roll back even more.
"that's it, pretty. gonna cum for me? gonna let me fill you up, beautiful? that'll- fuck ... that'll show them who i belong to, huh? all yours, baby. just like y- you're all mine."
"yours! gyu, fuck! y- yours!"
"and im yours, baby. dont forget."
he kept poisoning at you from below, dragging your hips so you'd bounce up and down at a pace that had your toes curling. he always knew how to fuck you in ways that had your mind going completely blank, like right now. neither of you paid mind to the dressing room next door that was full of staff who could likely hear your muffles whines against each other's lips. you relished on it, even, knowing that once you walked back in the room they'd know who mingyu really belonged to.
"cum, baby. need you to cum so i c- shit ... so i can fill you up."
"almost there, gyu, just ... fuck! just like that! i'm cumming! gyu!"
"yeah, shit. gonna fill you up now, okay, baby? want you to keep it all in. show them im yours, yeah?", his hips never slowed down despite being you being on top. you were now just a rag doll he was using for his own pleasure. nothing had ever felt this good.
he filled you up soon after, with most of it spilling out due to the massive size of his load. he used his fingers to push it back in, then lifting them to your lips for you to lick clean, which you did with no complaint.
"oh, baby ... my nasty girl. how could i ever look at anyone else when i have my nasty baby so desperate for me? hmm? you're perfect for me, angel. dont care about any girl that flirts with me. you're all i want," he used his fingers to push down on your tongue as he said this, groaning at the way you sucked and sucked while looking at him with wide eyes.
"gyu ..." you whined as soon as he left your mouth alone.
"but im still sorry, angel. i didnt realize it bothered you. i get it. kinda wanna fight any of ur male fans when they get a little too friendly with you. that rookie at mnet last month? wanted to take him out back for the way he was looking at you when you performed."
"gyu!," you knew your boyfriend had been jealous of your friend group due to their former crushes on you, but he'd never told you that he felt the same way about literally any man you'd come across as an idol.
"what? im just saying, i get it! im also possessive and jealous. thats why we compliment each other. now come on. lets get you dressed, baby. gotta go have a very awkward conversation with my stylist so she can fix everything you just did to me."
"me?! look at me! im covered in cum!"
"hmm yeah. so pretty, angel. you better have it all in you by the time we get home, yeah?"
you huffed, but agreed, rolling your eyes at the innocent peck that landed on your cheek as he helped you look presentable.
you knew things would be awkward around his staff from now on, but it had been worth it.
1K notes · View notes
Text
success life story ♡
heyy i'm here to share about my success story, the beginning is only before i started manifesting and about when i just started, all my success are on the very end of the blog, so feel free to skip directly at it if you're not interest by all the rambling !
have a good read ☆
Tumblr media
michiko is so pretty, i've literally been told so many times i looked liker <3
the old story that i don’t live in anymore
okay so before i didn’t hate my life, at all, but i just found very dull and so poor of entertaining like it was just too fucking regular and repetitive.also a bit depressing. i thought of myself of such an unlucky girl before and i was like affirming all the fucking time that i was unlucky and guess what? everything really used to go the way i didn’t want it to go every single damn time and i’d be like i knew it im so unlucky boo-hoo.
same for the money i would just go every single fucking day rambling to my friends how poor i was and how i wanted money so bad and the same story every single fucking for days, weeks, months.
i really wanted a new appartement and my own room cause i used to share same room as my sister and it really was getting on my nerves, i had no privacy and place for myself. the apartment was small, my mum always kept complaining about it and then she would argue about my dad about it but the reason why we couldn’t move out despite trying for several months was cause my dad had whole lotta debts and my mom had a really low paying and hard job she was exhausted and, it was quiet hard to see them being this unhappy and they still tried their hardest to make us happy so i really wanted to get back at them.
about social life i had very few friends and barely went out, i'd say probably one time a month. and i really wanted to get that life of the party, and those big ass friends group and also i was crazy desperate about having black friends cause i am black and literally the only black out here without none of black friends and i felt pretty left out like wtf am i the only black girl with no black friends cause all of them (that's so dumb tho.. ) were friends and gets invited to the most fun hangouts and i was embarrassingly jealous of that and also complained a lot about it…and kept asking tf was wrong with me.
STRONGLY on this one : i wanted a relationship so bad and i kept hating and being sad to those couple on tiktok’s. one time i actually cried cuz i wanted a boys’s love so bad like i was craving it so bad. i was in such despair state before..cringy ahh ☠️
i used to be rlly insecure about my looks too even tho at some moments i felt more confident, i kept comparing myself and waisting dozens of minutes enumerating my "flaws ". i knew about manifestation but not really about law of assumption , for me manifesting was really all about listening to subliminals, method and scripting. we all once knew that phase yeah? i used to manifest from time to time but then would just give up again,since i was not seeing results and so on. so useful wow.and then there’s the others things like mediocre grades, poor family health, just constant tiredness and fatigue feeling,
tw : mention of being depressed,sh,ed, : felt empty like life had absolutely no meaning, suicidal thoughts, tried to end by over-consumption of medication, self-harm and bulimia, constant complaining and NEGATIVE ONLY mindset.
but now, NOW i tell you ever single thing i’ve just listed changed completely like every single damn thing i’ve just listed is no more, it’s out of the date, dead, buried and no longer existing !
Tumblr media
it clicked
then at some point at my life i was just like. yk what? fuck i just wanna change it all. then i really like really  got into it all over again and for good. no more 1 week i try then giving up cause i ain’t seeing no « results ».
i watched hours and hours of ppl talking about loa (i’m not saying you should do this at all it’s just that i was very under-informed and wanted to know everything about loa)on youtube, shoutout to rita kaminski and hyler who really put me into it and informed me. then i started reading neville’s pdf books, and tumblr blogs, kinda overconsuming but i liked getting myself informed.
and then that’s where everything started and that i got aware of all the power i actually hold. all the things i actually can do just cause of my mind. i wrote down all my wishes in present tense ,like every single aspect i wanted to change/have in my life. and i started fully living in the end like really got myself into and at first of course, wavering from time to time in the beginning. it was pretty easy for me since i was used to manifestation.but what i didn’t do before is persist no matter what and that’s what was really tricky for me in the beginning to persist no matter what and not just give up to bullshit 3D. but when i kept moving forward no matter the 3D and made it facts the only my 4D matters and everything has already happened, ALL and every single wish down to the last one flowed into my life. ONE by ONE every single hour of the day i would get my manifestations down to the last letter i wrote in my notes.every single thing
Tumblr media
success storyy
in a matter of few weeks like really 3 week-ish like- 1 month max.
starting off LUCK i’m extremely lucky now every single time i play gambling activities i win. i’ve won insane amounts at scratch cards i think i’ve won in total more than 5’000$. JUST FROM SCRATCH CARDS.and before i started i NEVER EVER WON. now whenever i play there’s not one time that i’ll win absolutely nothing even just a small prize
won huge lottery prize (from 200 to 12k the biggest i’ve won yet)
winning a gambling games, either online or dice rolling luck,bets, bingos etc.. its literally insane every one keep telling that i literally has got god’s blessing (i’m the god guys🥰)
financially freedom, my parents upgraded jobs and i’ve got lots of incomes + the money my parents give me 
all the debts my dad had, he got rid of ALL of them and when i tell you mf had a lot of em☠️
move out in a new huge ass condo which is a duplex (like really like i wrote it it’s actually scary how powerful we are..) I’VE FINALLY GOT MY OWN ROOM and we’re getting my desired furnitures and decorating the house i’m so grateful
friends and popularity i think biggest shock for me is really this. like my social life has gone from very paisible to completely fully booked and passioning life. like seriously i’ve been to more parties, concerts, birthdays, and hangouts during the last 2 weeks holidays than in my entire life
got lot of new friends, healthy relationships and quality time passed on lots of fun activities and sm memories
black groups friend. WITH AN S.so thankful to myself to be this good a manifestation i litteraly got into a black friend group of girls and i’ve never felt more at my place and understood this much. and these girls know the black group boys (when i tell you that 2y ago they were the person that i wanted to be close with so bad..also they’re really hot and funny lol)so we hung out with them and i was literally so highlighted and became pretty much friends with all of them !! 
my man. HELLO I LITERALLY MANIFESTED MY DREAM RELATIONSHIP? when i met him i didn’t actually realize right on the spot that he was exactly how i wanted him to be and reading back to when i scripted out all the things i wanted at the beginning, everything matched. he’s literally physically and mentally the man of my dream LIKE REALLY. we’re no bf and gf YET cause it’s just a little soon but we see each others super often and we have the best relationship ever i swear it’s giving wattpad. the flirting is crazyyy.
dream bod.from head to toe my desired body. heavy on the lower body all for that azz and wide hips.ive got smooth and clear skin and smell good all the time!! litteraly flawless face + got my braces which suits so much and dimples
plenty of vacations (went to ibiza, usa and dubai )
lenient parents they use to be so strict before i swear its crazy they let me go so easily now, i can hangout without asking 3 days ,like they accept even if i've gotta go in the next hour or if wanna go on trip that's in another country. i can come back home so much later too
attractive & magnetic aura + being really charismatic (everyone i met keep telling me i’ve got this thing that really makes them want me, get closer to me)
good grades without doing much
perfect self-concept - as i kept living 24/7 in the state of wish fulfilled, my self concept only got better making me really know what i’m worth and never wavering/ going back to the old story
whole ass pc set up
all of my desired skincare/makeups/shoes/clothes
and so much more...
outro
i hope y'all liked my blog and that it motivated some of you to NEVER GIVE UP cause y'all are reallyy some powerful mfs and y'all already got all of yours desires !!
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ honey kisses, shayama
1K notes · View notes
leeneir · 5 months
Note
hiii ^_^!!! I hope ur having a wonderful day. Rlly love ur iso hcs (i’m srry i’m saying it again but their so good 😭.)
I was wondering could you do a pt.2 of the relationship hcs? Like how Iso would act once the relationship has rlly set in and he’s completely comfortable with us?
Tumblr media
thank you!
Ahhh!!! I'm so happy you love ny hcs!!!😭😭🫶🫶 PLEASE DONT APOLOGIZE IM ETERNALLY GRATEFUL THAT PPL LIKE MY STUFF LOL
I hope that this is to your liking!!<33
Relationship 2.0; Iso x GN!Reader
Tumblr media
Im ngl yall, I'm the thpe of person to write a 100k slowburn romance buildup but when it comes to actually writing the relationship itself... mind is wont to blank...
Your relationship is hidden from the others. Even with the no frat rule being tsken out of procotol policy, Iso is keen about keeping your relationship private. The only one that knows are Sage and whoever you're close/best friends with.
Don't get me wrong, he's not ashamed of you or your relationship or anything like that. Behind closed doors, Iso is the best boyfriend you could ever ask for. I mentioned it in the last post, but he's really just a big softie.
Iso turns in for the night at a designated time without fail, but you know that he doesn't actually sleep. You'll make up some excuse to the others to check up on him in his room.
Some nights, he'll let you in and you both talk about your day and it's relatively peaceful, some nights, he wont even let you knock, using his sixth sense to sense if your near his door and instantly pull you in without a word, holding you close to him and burying his face in your neck. That's his way of saying that he missed you very much💜
Very cuddly, he likes having the reassurance that you're alive and breathing by keeping you close to him.
He calls you by your name, and he'll ask you to do the same. Sure, he likes his new name "Iso", but Zhao Yu much rather preferred the intimate connection to you have when you call each other by gov names which was something he didn't get often. Names are a not so fun thing for him. (He's a lil traumatized, but that's for another post🤭)
When it gets cold, Iso also runs cold. If you run warm, you can put your hands on his face and he'll lean into the touch or you can grab his hands and just hold them. It's enough for him. If you run cold, it's the only time he's fine with PDA, aka snuggling on the couch.... joined by the other agents.
When it comes to jealousy, ik I mentioned it in the other post too, but he has another reaction. If Iso see's you with another agent that's flirting with you, he'll come up and offer you to listen to music with him. As you listen and are distracted, he stares at the other agent with his 'assassin' glare per se.
One day at a sleep over with the other agents, you guys play a classic game of truth or dare. It's your turn, you say truth. Jett goes in for the classic "Do you have a crush on anyone here?" And you deny it. You can feel someone staring at you, and once the others are distracted, you turn to Iso who has subtle smirk on his face, nodding his head back to signal that he wants you guys to leave. You playfully roll your eyes.
160 notes · View notes
vvh0adie · 8 months
Text
watching my friends leave tumblr is really sad
you literally can't win
at this point the writer's strike should just be a cultural movement
like ppl are writing for FREE and you're complaining about turn out rate and shit
we have lives and some of us (HELL ALL OF US) have some form of mental illness, so we can't be fucking cogs all day and churn out fics.
writing is suppose to be therapeutic and writers want to share that with you to ease the tension of this hellscape we live in
but some of these readers and even fellow writers are taking it too far with the bullying
like its mean and nasty. you don't know what someone is going thru.
instead of asking for updates how about check and see if your writer is mentally stable to do so. that right there is a booster, to have someone say "are you okay?"
and then the whole accusations of favoring a certain member/character. if that person is my muse or safe space then of course imma write for them. most solo writers i see don't even talk bad about other people. its a SOLO account. think of it as a shrine blog of writing if that helps. they're not there to trash, just share their writing for other's who might also share the same muse.
then you have readers who can't separate fiction from reality. just because someone writes a character with irl people faceclaimed onto them doesnt mean they actually think that person would be or do those things irl. i'll be the first to say that i only gave my characters bts faces cuz thats who im attracted to and they're who i imagine would be casted to play my characters.
then IN THE YEAR OF 2023 we still have ppl making fun of their peers writing and also THE FACT THAT ENGLISH MIGHT NOT BE THEIR FIRST LANGUAGE? that's nasty asf. majority of us dont even speak 'proper' english as our first language no way. you only shooting yourself in the foot. don't act like you dont have beta readers... like what are yall on?
and anybody who gets on THAT BLOG behind anon is an opp. not just to the writing community but in how you interact with the world all together. yall don't know how to talk to people anymore? it may have started as a place for critique and accountability but no one is bringing receipts or critical thinking anymore. its mainly for drama and not rehabilitation. yall serious scare me in how we'd see the reality of social change applied to the real world. like i'd be more scared to let yall around the prisoners with minor offenses cuz yall act like its the end of the world and that change cant happen. yall give nobody room to change ignorant stances but ignore the real egregious shit because you honestly dont have the bandwidth to take on actual fascist views.
also the plagiarism has got to stop too. if you need writing resources just ask. but practice makes perfect. so you're gonna have to write yourself. you may not like your writers voice but you will feel shitty in the long run when you don't feel like its you putting those words on the paper. it literally just prolongs your inferiority. make something you're proud of and don't hurt your fellow writers. we went thru the process just like you. we earned it. and most of us aren't gatekeepers, we will help you.
like its really tuff being on here sometimes. cuz if you not being hounded by readers its your own community praying on your down fall.
we have to do better.
298 notes · View notes
blingblong55 · 6 months
Text
In the air- 141
Tumblr media
Based on a request:
BLINGY LOOK https://twitter.com/david_kennedy11/status/1703563780523696558/photo/4 I CANT ANYMORE IM GOING THROUGH THE SAME PHASE I NEED THIS IN WRITING NOW KSHFALHLHFKLASHFLHAL (If it don't bother you, pls a fic of the ppl in the tweet on reacting to you buying smelling a candle that smells like them/their fav scent) --- GN!Reader, fluff, established!relationship
As your boyfriend was still on deployment, you grew to miss his scent around your room or flat more and more. Recently, you found a small business that did custom-made candles, so of course you ordered one. When it arrived, it sat pretty on a shelf in your room, candle-lit evening, you in bed and cuddled to your pillows and blankets. He walked in, ready to surprise you when he smelt himself as he approached your room. You weren't aware of his presence until you heard his boots being taken off and placed under your bed.
Soap:
The smell was known all too well, and he absolutely grinned when he noticed the label on the candle. "John MacTavish." it read.
It brought comfort, that his partner would do this because they missed him and that his scent roamed the flat when he was away.
"Yer did this for me?" His big strong arms wrap around you. A little nod from his lover sends the best butterflies to his stomach. It was the best way to flatter him.
He had to admit, he blushed really hard when you went looking for your laptop to show him the website.
It was as if he was a little boy, blushing and having this inside feeling of utter happiness
He actually made a mental note of the website/seller to order one with your scent, a small size of course for when he was away and missed you.
Gaz:
The second he wrapped his arms around you, he noticed the smell but what was more notable was the candle with a sticker of his name.
"Kyle Garrick." He looked at you and then you shyly looked away. "Love, what's this?" he picked up the candle, taking a smell and smiling.
His lover, the prettiest thing in this world, has a candle of his smell. It was cute, his blush and how he too shied away.
He didn't let go, he couldn't let go of you for an hour. He knows how much you missed him and to know it went this far to get a candle, yeah this man was over the moon.
Like Soap he too knew he must buy a candle with your scent, it would bring comfort after flying upside down helicopters or having as run-in with cartels
After all, he and you, whether any one liked it or not, would have the home you created smelling like the other.
Price:
He wasn't much for showing too many flustered faces but this? oh boy did it send him to a different world
Like Gaz, he didn't let go of you for a while, mainly because this was how he rubbed his smell on you and because as you were squished by his arms, he made sure to memorise the website/seller name.
He is the kind of man who really does take the small gestures or things that someone goes out their way for very seriously, it means more and it's far more special
"Do I really smell like that, darling?" He looks over the candle, "Johnathan Price" the label red, only very few people knew his actual name and having it displayed in this room was an honour.
Ghost:
When I tell you he felt like the most special and important person, I mean it. "Simon Riley" proudly stuck to a candle glass, a grin on his scarred face
Kisses upon kisses, "Oh my love," he said between kisses. The scent he knew best, mainly because you always told him that it was your favourite on him.
This for him was a reminder that he does and always will have someone to wait for him back home, his little love.
That night, you saw his soft side, the one that loves to overexaggerate being sick and the one who pouts and lets you baby him
And like the others, he too will have a candle order arriving with your name and the smell of his comfort place, you.
Tags: @anonymuslydumb @liyanahelena
247 notes · View notes
opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years
Text
...
#the agony of writing personal statements. or statements of purpose#why is it so hard? bc i dont kno how to balance listing things i can do vs waxing on abt bullshit i like#idk i just feel v pretentious when i write things bc i also kinda talk that way when i can get a sentence out straight. when i can figure#out what im trying to say. so i just sorta talk kinda weird. or i say weird stuff#its not a bad thing really. but idk how much i should let it out on these statements#or what i should focus on#what to say: i studied extremophilic soil communities. learned stats coding. loved cyanos.#but also: i enjoy science communication? sort of. i like talking abt things and hearing other perspectives but u gotta kno what im saying#1st so i gotta teach u. and i want to help ppl understand things in a way that makes sense to them bc everyone learns differently#but also im too tired and depressed to do thst lmao#sigh... its just hard bc my interests seem frivolous. like theres an academic justification but im not actually interested in being useful#thats just a side effect. so i dont wanna talk abt that stuff#ugh. annoying i wanted to finish writing thrm today but then i got invited to go hiking#and going on a 3hr hike sounded like a better idea than sitting in ny apartment having a breakdown#and then i ran around in the rain a while. so not a bad day as it turned out#but a very unproductive weekend :-/#ok but the annoying part abt the personal statement writing is that i know im agonizing over it more than i should#bc i kno some jackass out there is applying to the same school and just slapped one together and im wasting hours and hours#on 1 to 2 pages. annoying. and i might mot even get in idk#uuuuuuugh. and it looks like i might have to share a room with my boss for thurs thru Sunday night on our sampling trip#itll b fine i just might wilt being around ppl too much#also have like a streight up 11hr car ride with my lab mate. which will b ok hopefully bc we r friends#but like idk i feel like i kinda gotta pull the conversation with him so blah well see what happens#blah. i fluctuate between: im so burnt out im not having fun anymore#and then remembering: oh wait i am passionate abt things. i wish i had the energy. and then slumping over again#idk @ thr Universities im applying to: u should accept me bc i said so. there. end of statement#unrelated#university: what do i wanna b when u grow up?#me: fuck it i guess a professor? i just wanna do cool research. i dont actually want to work for a uni bc fuck that#i also dont wanna talk to ppl. just habe my own office and do cool science stuff rip
9 notes · View notes
shattersstar · 8 months
Note
ok but we need to hear more about college dick now👀👀
hehe ask and u shall receive because ohhh myyy dick in college is such a messsssssss but like so pretty it’s almost unfair
i love the idea of dick and a bunch of his friends getting a house together with the intent of being Normal for the first time in a while, which means being absolute menaces as most 20 smth yr old guys are
very much known for being a party house bordering a frat but all the guys r so nice that it’s rlly hard to think of them like that. it’s a space where he can let go, feel like himself and with the encouragement of his friends, dick puts the brakes on like relationship hunting and just has fun..
he’s been in pretty committed relationships since he was old enough to be and has always struggled with casual dating let alone sleeping with people he barely know. but when dick learns there r ppl out there looking for the same thing and not everyone wants to b the next future ex mr/mrs. grayson it makes it a lil easier to be his charming self with no bounds <33
and then he mets you and it’s the usual routine, flirting you to his bedroom which is in the basement—of course—well alllllmost doing so until you vanish out of his grasp for reasons dick cannot discern (you weren’t here for him silly)
and while he’s not like one of those oh i wanted to hit and couldn’t so im gonna chase you types, dick does have to reconcile with the fact your friends with roy and spend a lot of time at the house now
which also means he learns how cool you r and how goofy he feels for just tryna sleep with you
and despite his friends vouching for him you really only see (and have heard the numerous rumours) dick as a rich playboy and that’s not for you. plus he’s def a business or poli sci major……….but with a psych minor bc it feels the most practical despite how boring dick finds most of his classes
though when he realizes your both in a psych elective together he’s all toothy grins and obnoxious air which isn’t helping his case but of course he’s a decent student and when you mentioned hating statistics—you were stuck with the worse prof outta the two—dick jumped at the chance to help
you were sooooooo skeptical and even though agreed you kept brushing him off until dick just started helping you when you were over to hang out. he drops a textbook in your lap while sitting in roy’s bed or starts reviewing your notes and adding examples while your hanging out on the living room floor building lego sets with everyone else.
and dick did that a lot—sure it was his house and roy was his best friend along with all of his other housemates but dick never hesitated to insert himself into whatever you were doing when you came over. and it shouldn’t surprised you but everyone being so..unbothered by it had you confused. like maybe that’s how dick is but it spoke bounds to their closeness and was the First time you actually saw a little more to dick than just some campus hottie douchebag who threw parties to get laid
and while you weren’t about to tell dick that, you did start coming over with the intent of working on stats together. it usually meant dick having to re-lecture whatever your prof barely managed to explain and helping you with the page long equations needed for assignments
and dick keeps it as platonic as possible, on a mission to prove he’s not the person you think he is and not only because he wanted to be with you—well yeah he does—but because dick cares what you think about him. he knows his friends care about you and value what you have to say and he wants you to know it’s the same for him
and maaaybe you see that too but dick needs to suffer a little more
bonus: you talk to dick abt ppl you’re interested in at some point (either genuinely or to mess with him) when he insists on always hanging out with you and roy. and while he gives advice with a smile, still trying to prove his capacity for mature, platonic relationships, dick screams into his pillow later that night when he goes over the convo again and again and agai—
bonus bonus: he’s probably on the school’s gymnastics team <3
181 notes · View notes
Note
WIBTA for inviting my cousin to an LGBT meet up?
Cw: mentions of suicide and transphobia
I (18M) am a trans man and my cousin N (21F) is a lesbian who is very masc presenting. We're the only queer cousins in the family (at least in our generation) so weve always been good friends and shes been one of the biggest supporters of my transition, defended me from bigoted family members and always corrected family when they used my deadname/old pronouns. I lowkey hoped she would come out as a trans man or nonbinary as well. We dress in the same style which makes it so when were hanging out together one of us is gonna get misgendered since people asume both of us are trans men or masc girls. When N is the one being misgendered she doesnt bother fighting it since its more trouble than its worth but looking back i think it really annoyed her.
Earlier this year N was severely struggling with her mental health. I apologize for the wording i may have since i dont know the proper terminology for this stuff or any specific disorder diagnosis she may have (other than autism). She was having some sort of manic or depressive episode. She was dead set on pushing people away and making them hate her so she could take her own life without regrets.
I visited N once to give her my support during a struggling time but i stupidly told her there was nothing she could say that would push me away. She told me not to test her but i kept pushing it and i admit what happened next was my fault. She told me in a very cold voice that she was a terf, though that she didnt want me dead but that "we" (im guessing she meant trans ppl) made it so much harder for her to exist(???????). I didnt let her keep talking just and left her room, said my goodbyes to her family and just cried while driving home.
Im still not sure if she meant it or if it was part of her mental episode and just a way for her to hurt me and push me away. On one hand ig it explains some of her behavior? N sometimes complained when she got asked for her pronouns or being misgendered like I mentioned before. On the other hand, I gen do not believe she has been a terf all along esp with how supportive shes been of me. If she was a terf youd think she would try to subtly talk me out of it, but that has never happened. My friends have nicknamed her schrodinger's terf lol
Anyway, i went no contact with N for a few months for my own wellbeing. During this time i heard that she tried to kill herself a few times, which got her into a mental hospital. She was given higher doses of meds and seems to be doing way better.
We had a family reunion this week and i decided to approach her. N seemed a little hesitant to talk to me but stayed polite. I tried testing her and talked about the effects T has been having on me but she acted like she always had and congratulated me and even complimented me on how deep my voice has gotten. I wasnt satisfied cause i wanted an apology for what she had said to me so i pushed it more. She did end up apologzing but it was a very surface level apology. At this point i didnt want to keep pushing in case it set her off again so i just took her apology (plus i wanted my best cousin back) and spent the rest of the day hanging out with her.
On the way home my mom said she was happy me and N had made up and that i should invite her to the lgbt club meetings Ive been going to this year. It seemed like a good idea to me, she lost a few friends during her episode and she could make more queer friends here. If N is trans and just in denial it could help her get the resources she needs to feel comfortable coning out. If N IS a terf maybe having more positive interactions with trans ppl could change her mind on it. Overall i thought it would be a win for her.
I brought it up to my friends and some of them blew up at me. Their argument was that itd be exposing the other trans ppl in the group to a terf and putting them in danger. I truly hadnt considered this angle so im kinda conflicted now. She had never felt like an unsafe person before and now that her episode is over she feels normal again. Even if she is a terf i dont think she could actually cause harm? I want N to get better but i dont want to put my trans friends at risk.
So tumblr, WIBTA for inviting N to my lgbt meet up?
What are these acronyms?
125 notes · View notes
thatdeadaquarius · 1 year
Note
Reader that can emit sounds from their memory(like as an aura)
Walk into a room? Why do I hear boss music
Comedic timing? Fuck yeah.
Bored? Jumpscare noise.
Zhongli talking? Jeopardy theme.
Someone is annoying? Earrape.
Think about it!
Hello! I’m the 12th Harbinger, aka as CHIL- bitch shut the fuck up, WHATS UP ITS YA BOY AQUARIUSSS- /ref
Tumblr media
lmao imagine you walking into a room like this in teyvat, with like that audio I SAVE BY GIVING IT CPR- TIGHT AS VIRGIN BOY DONT GET NERVOUS-
(also ill stop apologizing for the late replies to these, bc as we all know by now that im slow and u will get answered eventually i promise tumblr most likely didnt delete u guys asks im just hoarding them LMAO)
I’ve been super busy running in circles so sorry about ghosting! I still very much enjoy and love u guys and love seeing you guys enjoy my stuff :’) 
Still cant believe that, but thank you!
JEOPARDY THEME MUSIC WHEN ZHONGLI TALKS
HE’D BE SO CONFUSED
THINKIN HE GOT AN ANCIENT CURSE HE DOESNT KNOW ABT PUT ON HIM OR SMTH BC HE’S ALWAYS BEING STALKED BY THIS SONG-
(tbh unless the person is super observant I dont think most ppl would get that it’s YOU causing this chaos lmao)
Like I can see Zhongli eventually getting it lol, other ppl I could see after the first few weeks of interacting with you (esp bc you mix it up, honestly it was only bc u kept playing the jeopardy theme over and over when Zhongli ranted on too long that he got it was you 💀):
Heizou (he’s the best detective on all of Inazuma’s islands, ofc he got it! no he will not acknowledge that he totally thought you were hiding a very musical tanuki somewhere on your person at all times lol)
Alhaitham and Cyno (haitham took like, two hours of walking around town with you and knew, bc he’s a little know-it-all lazy bastard like that, and Cyno is actually just really aware, despite what most ppl think, he’s the General Mahamatra and not just a regular Mahamatra for a reason after all)
Tighnari (i stg he can like, smell when bullshittery is happening in his vicinity …or... hear?)
Venti (unsurpringly, he’s totally in love with this power of yours, i mean he definitely loves you cares about you a lot he says, but you’re starting to think he’s just lying to butter you up into pranking Diluc, Barbara, Jean, and really the entirety of Mondstadt more often  including Zhongli just so he can laugh until he’s on the ground again, also he definitely once asked you to make a dragon sound that’s the equivalent of shouting FUCK at Dvalin when he was flying overhead one day)
Hmm
Hm hm hmmmm
Who elseee, i need a characcctterrr lisstttt…
Albedo (duh, he’s albedo, you think he has an entirely too thick folder dedicated to your recent obsessions, you rant a lot about it while playing and also he can access your browsing history 👀, and he somehow doesn't know that about you?? You’re like, literally one of his long-term, there-for-life, has-bought-a-house-for-free-in-his-head-you- arent-even-on-rent-anymore, hyperfixations or special interests. Autistic!Albedo is autistic, Because I Am Your God, And I Say It Is So.)
Dehya (always knows when its you walking around near her bc you like to listen to your old world’s songs too often when you arent pranking bitches, she actually rlly likes it and your music tastes…)
HOLY FUCK SPEED RUN BC GOD THERE’S TOO MANY BITCHES WANNA BE YOUR BABY, RIDING AROUND IN A DAMN MERCEDES-
OKAY-
SO not all in the same way or at the same time, or even the same length of time did they realize you literally change background music or some shit so I’ll let you just- you know okay- like you get it- you get it.
Xiao, Kazuha, Kaeya, Diluc, Ayato, Yae Miko, Keqing, Qiqi, Klee, Sara, Kuki, Nahida, Ningguang, Rosaria, Scaramouche/Babygirl, Dainsleif, Kokomi, Xinyan, Yun Jin, Yelan. 
Jfc got the whole damn pride flag up here
Anyway everybody else outta luck, at least takes em a month or longer to get it lol
Sorry abt the end there i didnt feel like writing out all those bitches bc the few I did before were already longer than I thought they’d be…
Also, I am posting these spam of drafts (and that old follower 100+ event possession headcanons in prep for the next 2 weeks bc I will be really busy, again :/
Got spring break shenanigans this week, then I’ll be running around like a cat with zoomies bc im getting ready to install/actually submit my artworks for the gallery exhibition! 
…wish me luck or prayers or anything good from any god you believe in, I need the strength. 
With love, safe travels,
💀♒️
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist
386 notes · View notes
cabin10diaries · 6 months
Text
im so im so. obsessed with jason but specifically what other people think of him
reyna oh my beloved reyna <333 she knew him the best of everyone and then he disappeared, came back brand new? new friends, new girl, new person, and shes glad he's happy but where did HER jason go ? the one she trained with, spent years getting close with, spending all her time with? he was taken from her, and as happy as she is for the new jason he can never fill her heart the same
piper my lovely was basically coerced into a relationship built on false narratives with him, and she broke up bc that wasnt right !! what were they now? ofc, they were friends, but the tension of fake memories and fading feelings was still effective. it was so hard to talk to him but she wanted it to be easy again like in her fake memories
leo (this is valgraced bc im a valgrace truther ok?) hated him but loved him as a friend and more. jason was what leo wanted to be; respected, smart, listened to, not seeming like a burden. he wanted that so bad, which made him want jason, too. stuck between do i want my best friends boy or do i want to kill him and take his place? he was soo jealous but guilty of the jealousy bc it wasnt like it was jasons fault the way ppl treated the two differently. and jason was the same to leo, he wanted leos humor and be able to make a room laugh instead of having them glare at him for being to stern, even tho thats what he had been taught to do. they found a unique bond with each other by wanting aspects of each other while liking the parts they didnt want to be
cohort5/new rome [bar hazel and frank] etc looked up to him so much. he was their role model, their leader, their voice of reason, the person to turn to, THE guy. they basically idolized and dehumanized him to nothing but the boy who was raised to lead them, especially bc he was the son of jupiter. the first in so long, ofc he was important and special, why treat him like normal ?
percy ,,, he respected jason eventually. they clashed but they learned how to work through the clashing and fight alongside each other instead of against each other. they had similar yet dif personalities, percy fighting to be listened to while jason had been forced to speak. both leaders, respected, treated like leaders but in dif ways bc of the way their social groups functioned. they both wanted what each other had; percy wanted the stability of new rome, knowing he'd have people that would come back alive every summer. jason wanted the close bonds of camp halfblood without being put into a heavy spotlight
thalia loved him. he was her younger brother, how could she not? she pitied him, tho, from the way he lived in new rome. she knew the life well, being thrown into the spotlight and everything bc she herself was a daughter of zeus (like how chiron and camp treated her, esp if u compare it with how they treated percy after she came back) and hoped he would find a place better. her arms were always open for him but she had another life she wanted to live, too
octavian. pure hatred and jealousy. jason was everything he wanted. he was in leader positions, respected, listened to. octavian thought of him similarly to leo, but without the good bond. he despised jason because he wanted everything jason got just for being born from jupiter. it was unfair, and octavian decided to take advantage when jason disappeared. he wouldnt have another chance to take the spots that belonged to him
nico grew fond of him. he couldnt not have, esp after how jason treated him after the cupid incident. immediately showing his trust, backing him up, etc etc, it was finally someone nico could trust and talk to after years of running from camp and monsters and guilt of dead sisters and tense/awkward friend?ship with his very happily taken crush. nico found someone he could depend on, even if he didnt want to
beryl damn. she had some love for him. deep down, she knew she did, he was her son. but she couldnt focus on him, she had her life to take. her downfall started with thalia and zeus, jason made it worse. even if he was her son, the little love she had for him was so hard to find. too hard to even try. so, she left him, maybe hoping for a better life for him, or wanting to get rid of him. she knew both reasons were true
hedge isnt too talked about in general but he loved jason okay. the son he never had, before chuck. he was him and leos and pipers protector, and he would lay down his life for any of the three. they were his children, even if he no longer talks to them, theyll hold the spot in his heart
hazel and frank and annabeth had similar thoughts about jason. none were really close; hazel and frank looked up to jason like the rest of new rome, but could see him as a person because they actually talked to him. they thought positively about jason, he was friends with all three. even if they werent as close as tlh trio, they still liked jason. how could you not, after a war stuck with them? they think of jason like one does with a friend who used to be close, but grew apart simply because of time. they like him, but theyre not close
hera oh !! he was her son. he was her champion. he was hers, even if he was caused by the reoccuring infidelity of her husband. he was her champion and she loved him like a son. she had a genuine bond with him, one thats hard to form with a god and mortal/demigod. she was the better beryl, and him the better heracles
lesterpollo. he thinks of jason so. much. i firmly believe jason was a big big big part in lester changing, i mean, watching someone know they were going to die and WILLINGLY go into the situation? he had nothing but respect and admiration towards jason. jason was like a mentor to him, showing and reminding him of the right thing to do
143 notes · View notes
emotboyswag · 2 months
Text
The bittersweet nature of "passing" as a trans person
I have no regrets in my transition except this one thing which i find it hard to express bcs i dont wanna sound ungrateful for being a passing trans person.
my disclaimer to this post is: it is hard to be a non passing trans person and non passing trans people are far more vulnerable than passing trans people. Also passing is not every trans persons goal. Although it is one of my goals in my transition im not saying "i have it now i regret it" im just gonna say kinda like. a sadder side to passing.
pre T i would say i passed like 60% of the time to cis ppl and when i wasnt seen as a dude theyd always either ask my pronouns or like ask my gender (i live in a pretty liberal place). i was quite rarely out and out just misgendered like maybe 5% of the time in the basically 7 years i lived as a pre T trans person (not including ppl who misgendered me on purpose) but i was sooo clocky to trans people like i am a v socially awkward guy but i found it easy to make trans friends when i met trans people irl when i was pre T bcs they mostly knew and we kinda were drawn together.
Im now a year and 8 months on T and i love passing i pass genuinely 100% of the time even when im not binding (and i have a larger chest that im very dysphoric about) and i have a cis passing voice. I often have a lot of like. not imposter syndrome about it but i have bad dysphoria and often assume im not gonna pass when i do or assume i look more like a girl than i do. Also im 5'3 and have kinda long hair (not long but i used to have it super short and now its a bit longer) but im just seen as a cis guy. so like i am not pretending i dont love passing it makes my life soo much easier and lessened my dysphoria.
What i will say is i miss the immediate kinship of meeting another trans person or being in the same room as another trans person and both knowing ur trans or becoming friends bcs ur trans or automatically having someone to pair up w in a group of strangers bcs u both know ur trans. Also on nights out i miss meeting new ppl and just talking to each other about being trans bcs we automatically recognise each other. like i miss the solidarity u feel as a trans person when u seen another one rather than trans ppl assuming im cis and me actively making an effort to mention im trans around new trans ppl. also i miss that trans ppl used to feel automatically safe around me whereas now i know bcs im perceived as a cis man sometimes they feel on edge. idk its just bittersweet i think <3
29 notes · View notes