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celestialtarot11 · 1 month

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How to Turn Your Situation Into Something Positive 🍵💗

Hi friends! Welcome to another PAC reading where we’ll be looking at how to transform any current situations you’re in! Keep in mind there are many different groups here and there will be messages which you won’t resonate with, just leave it for someone else 😊❤️ Please like, comment and reblog to share the love ☮️

Pile 1 🌟- Hi there pile 1’s! Someone definitely did ya’ll dirty in a situation and it left you feeling sad and lonely. A loss was created because someone handled a situation unfairly, and you’ve been feeling very down. This situation felt like it was weighing on your chest, and possibly there was a misunderstanding of feelings, or someone took something the wrong way and blew up here. And I feel like you took the brunt of the situation for a long time. I feel like this is something that was happening for a long time, and you’ve been wanting justice to come to this situation, or karma to hit that person to show them where they went wrong. Its also very possible for some of you this person reached out and reignited those triggers and you’re finding it difficult to be compassionate towards them. Your anger is understandable and so are your triggers, I feel like spirit is saying it’s important to know your boundaries in this situation and have your back. Look after you first. There are/were people who benefitted from you having no boundaries because they liked the feeling of power, and that needs to change. There’s this feeling of stepping up or no longer accepting their bullshit, which I’m so proud of you pile 1! Know your worth and value. Thats how you turn this situation into a positive one. Knowing your true worth and value will help you walk away from anything that is less than what you want. This person could be bread-crumbing you and as of now you’re done with that energy! Im also hearing whilst its very understandable you’d wish someone their own karma, spend your time wishing yourself the blessings you’ve always wanted instead. Feed yourself empowerment and start thinking “how can I support myself now?” be there for yourself pile 1, and also once you heal you begin to see a lot of things that you didn’t before. Within yourself and everyone else. Happy healing pile 1 💗🌟 Wishing you the best! Please like comment and reblog to support this blog ✨

Pile 2 ☮️- Hi there pile 2! ❤️🌟 Welcome to your reading. For you I see you need to distance yourself from a community or situation here and really really focus on your self confidence. Your esteem, body, and health. There’s something about getting your life in order and no longer letting external factors or people tell you what to do. Become your own boss in this situation. Some of you need to take an active role in this situation as well and know you’re the shit! 💗 like speaking up, setting boundaries, deciding what YOU’ll do, not focusing on them. You’re everything anyone could ever want, and some of you may have forgotten that. Your true power is meant to come out in this situation. What would help as well is remaining unbothered by this person or situation. I’m hearing it’s a silly situation, for some of you. Like petty high school drama. There could be someone trying to compete with you and show they are the best, but truthfully insecurities are loud, confidence is quiet. I’m hearing from spirit let them make a fool out of themselves because they are responsible for themselves only! What they say and what they do is on them. Continue working on yourself because I feel like whoever this is, is trying to undermine your confidence or skill, and you won’t stand for it and shouldn’t! 😤 I also feel like spirit will be giving you messages in your dreams about this situation so definitely sleep with amethyst, clear quartz or lavender herb under your pillow. If not allergic, drink lavender and chamomile before you bed ✨either way I feel like your presence is truly amazing and its like royalty, and what you need to know is that don’t give those haters your attention. Focusing on yourself is literally the best outcome here. Thank you pile 2’s! Please like comment and reblog to spread the love 💗🌹

Pile 3 ⌛️- Hi there pile 3’s! First of all I just want to ask if ya’ll are okay? 🥹❤️ Ya’ll seem to be going through it. Either a relationship with someone got unhealthy and controlling, or there has been a loss and you’re struggling to cope with it. Spirit is offering a lot of support and healing right now, and although you may not see it or feel it, spirit is protecting you heavily now. There’s a veil around you. I also feel that this ending was necessary because it was getting toxic, controlling and brought out the worse. I think someone here had to make a decision to choose themselves over toxicity. And it’s okay to hurt by that too. Honor and acknowledge your loss without shaming yourself for making the healthy choice 💗 I received the Queen Of Cups so I feel like there’s something about focusing on your growth and healing now. “Let growth be your mission. Let healing be your reward. Let freedom be your goal.” I love this quote and I go by it. Spirit wanted me to share it with ya’ll. I feel like ya’ll have been working on your healing for a long time and revisited something of the past, and its been tough processing it. In a way, its allowing this new version of you to come through and grow every time 💗🥹 This new version of you has a lot of emotional abundance and knowledge, and is definitely patient and caring. I feel like your higher self is coming through to also say it’s important to feed yourself kind words. If harsh words worked it would’ve worked a long time ago is what I heard too. Call yourself the names you wish to be called, like nicknames, talk gently, and use respectful words to yourself the way you would with anyone else ✨💗 I feel like you guys used to give everyone your secret wisdom, or the things you’ve healed from like all of that information, and now you are being asked to remain private and selective about it. This will help you a lot in this situation to focus on yourself. Thank you for being here pile 3 and I sincerely hope this helped you ❤️🌟 Please like comment and reblog to help this blog grow 🌟😊

Thank ya’ll for stopping by! Its highly appreciated and I really hope this PAC got ya’ll the clarity you needed ❤️🥹 Thank ya’ll for being here always.

Paid Readings 💗✨

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celestial-quill-n-ink · 9 months

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Autistic MC Headcanons

Featuring: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub & Belphegor

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Quick Note: I wrote this from my own personal experience, so some traits might not fit with your own personal experiences, which is completely Ok! These are all very self-indulgent for me, so I'll be happy if even anyone else out there likes what I've written! - Celeste

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🌟Lucifer🌟

✦ Above all else, Lucifer will listen intently to your personal experiences and directly ask you how you would like your time in the Devildom to be improved

✦ He completely accepts his lack of knowledge in the situation and would consult with both Satan and Solomon about Human mental health and wellbeing

✦ He begins to check in with you on a more consistent basis, making sure you're not overworking yourself and being stressed out by your tasks

✦ He gains even more respect for your persistence and tenacity, and does his best to make his appreciation known with words of affirmation and praise

✦ If he happens to be around when you are in an overwhelming situation, he'll swiftly de-escalate it and, if you would like, hold you close and soothe you with careful repetitive motions

✦»✩☆✩⇢★⇠☆⇢✮⇠☆⇢★⇠✩☆✩«✦

💳Mammon💳

✦Mammon would initially be confused, but not in the way you might expect, as he had already accepted you for all your quirks and didn't see any issues with your social divergences

✦ He is your biggest hype man, always standing by your side whenever you may need encouragement or comfort

✦ It truly cannot be understated how Mammon will just drop everything in an instant to be there for you when you're feeling anxious, and though he'll never admit it out loud, he's utterly humbled by how quickly you seem to calm down the moment he's in your presence

✦ He has similar issues with focusing and prioritizing work due to distractions (mainly those of the golden variety), so he admires you all the more when you tell him of your silent struggles with your tasks and how you continue to persist in spite of it

✦»✩☆✩⇢★⇠☆⇢✮⇠☆⇢★⇠✩☆✩«✦

🎮Leviathan🎮

✦ Levi was already aware of your social struggles, as you had both partially bonded over your shared anxiety and awkwardness, but he was honestly quite fascinated about the whole concept of neurodivergency

✦ You would offer him any and all online resources you used to learn about the topic, and you would both end up discussing the finer details of your experiences well into the early morning

✦ He realizes how unintentionally dismissive he's been about your special interests, as he was already wrapped up in his own interests, and resolves himself to always give you a place to gush about your current fixations

✦ (It's with this diversion of his attention that he also realizes that he absolutely adores your excited smiles and giggles, and will never not feel blessed to be part of the reason why you can be so unabashedly happy)

✦ You better believe that when any special occasions roll around, he's pulling out all the stops to get that one piece of obscure merchandise you told him about months ago, because you deserve nothing but his best efforts scouring the internet for Akuzon and D-bay listings

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📚Satan📚

✦ Satan already has some baseline knowledge of the DSM and the different kinds of diagnoses Humans can be assigned, so he's more than willing to get a better understanding of things through a first-hand source

✦ He already had a personal fondness for your physical and vocal stims, and learning the underlying meaning of those actions will end up making him keenly attuned to your comfortability in any social situation

✦ If he notices you wringing your hands or repeatedly shifting your eyes in a tense situation, he's sticking right by your side and giving you gentle and repetitive ministrations to let you know that he's there for you

✦ Conversely, if he sees you kicking your feet with a smile on your face, humming along to one of your favourite songs, it fills him with an intense and almost prideful feeling as he just basks in your presence

✦ He just finds himself feeling soft and fuzzy inside whenever he witnesses your expressive voice and gestures, as he knows it to be very different from how you act publicly, which truly makes him feel special to you.

✦ He's had his own issues with identity and how others perceived him as an extension of Lucifer, so he tries his best to give you validation and reassurance that you are enough; whether you are masking or not

✦ He also completely respects your motivation to push past your anxiety and go outside more often, and will help you in meticulously planning out day trips to both fantastical and peaceful Devildom locales

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🌸Asmodeus🌸

✦ You initially worry that Asmo wouldn't really be able to understand what you're talking about if he hasn't experienced it himself, but his immediate acceptance and willingness to learn more about you puts your anxiety at ease

✦ He knows that he'll never truly understand your experiences in life, and would rather focus on finding out what makes you most happy and comfortable and do all within his power to make it a reality

✦ He always had a way of getting you to confess your innermost issues, no matter how small or insignificant, and allows you a space to vent about the misunderstandings and mistreatment of neurodivergent individuals (and later on with matters of the heart)

✦ He goes on to learn every little detail he can about your fashion sense and what he can do to make you feel pampered and taken care of, so slow-paced shopping sprees and relaxing spa days become a new daily routine for you both

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🍔Beelzebub🍔

✦ Beel is immediately supportive of you and also feels very grateful in knowing how comfortable you are around him and his brothers to be able to tell them something so personal

✦ Early into your tenure in the Devildom, you had already made your highly specific eating habits well known (to your embarrassed dismay at the time), and ever since making the pact, Beel would gently encourage you to try different Devildom foods that he believed would fit with your Human tastes

✦ He understands what it's like to bottle up his emotions to not overwhelm others around him, so he would always be there for you whenever you would shut down and just need a consistent and grounding weight in the form of a warm bear hug

✦ When comforting you, he often asks you about your Human family, and just as much as it's a distraction to help you calm down, it also enlightens Beel to your indomitable loyalty and care for those you deem to be your family (in which he deeply respects your values and feels like a kindred spirit)

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🌌Belphegor🌌

✦ Belphie was always aware of the subtle weariness that permeated your presence despite your bright and happy demeanour, and without even needing to know anything about masking, he would continually invite you to nap with him after dinner (with varying degrees of success initially)

✦ He inherently has a sarcastic streak in him, and while that clashed with your literal interpretation of his words at first, he started to understand your perspective and grew more endeared to your cute pouty reactions whenever he seemed outwardly cold or uncaring

✦ Whenever you were just hanging out with Belphie, you felt comfortable enough to let your mask fall off and relax without worrying about how you appeared to others, with which the youngest brother silently took an immense amount of pride in this exclusivity

✦ He has times where he reflects on how he manipulated you, and how you later confided in him about your fears of being perceived as naïve and idiotic, in which he does all that he can with both his words and actions to show how much he genuinely respects your unwavering kindness and empathy

✦»✩☆✩⇢★⇠☆⇢✮⇠☆⇢★⇠✩☆✩«✦

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eepyuii · 5 months

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frostbite — pt. 2

pairing ; childe x gender neutral!reader

content ; childhood friends to “rivals” to lovers, slowburn-ish

cw ; swearing, a LOT of canon archon quest yappery (sorry)

note ; part two baybee!! in comparison to the ao3 version of this, i’ve decided to merge the chapters two by two to make them seem longer and since so far, i’ve only written five- next one might take a little longer to come out. or maybe i’ll just post chapter 5 stand-alone, who knows

also i’ve got a taglist now!

previous | next | masterlist

your arrival in liyue harbor goes less than stellar.

the port is packed full of people who are either confused or outraged at the line of millelith soldiers who refuse to let anyone through. you end up waiting in a line for an annoying amount of time, up until you’re finally attended to by a soldier.

“i’m sorry but liyue harbor is not accepting in any tourists, we are trying to keep our… current situation under control as best we can while investigations are still in order, i hope you can understand.” the millelith states formally.

“oh, well err- i’m no tourist, i was born in liyue harbor! my parents migrated from overseas many years ago and i was just on a leisurely trip to snezhnaya, haha…” you lie through your teeth.

the mere mention of snezhnaya sets off the most minute reaction in the millelith solider, hence why you’re under a fake identity to begin with. you politely hand him a folder with forged documents so gracefully provided to you by your employers and pray to your lucky stars- and, well, tsaritsa, that it’s good enough for him to let you pass.

the soldier remains neutral for a few seconds as he eyes through the paper.

“very well. but please behave in an orderly fashion inside the city, as i said the trail on the ahem- incident is still fresh. welcome home.”

it takes a lot out of you not to snort at the welcome.

the poor naïve man truly wasn’t lying- the inside of the harbor was just as tumultuous as the outside. people in the streets gather in small groups and anxiously whisper their worries to each other. but most of all, they eye you suspiciously like you were the one to stab a sword through rex lapis with the entire harbor watching. you’d say they’re within reason to do so, losing their protector god and all.

you wouldn’t call yourself the most devoted of subjects but you’d also hate to imagine a snezhnaya without the tsaritsa so… benevolently

watching over it. challenging the heavenly principles like she has would certainly cause a catastrophic bite in the ass for the nation if she were to perish. maybe you could be a devoted subject enough to prevent that from happening.

drowning in a whirlpool of your own thoughts, you don’t even realize you’re already standing in front of the northland bank branch of liyue harbor. you try to walk inside as discreetly as possible, so as to not raise any suspicion toward you from the millelith or civilians and to not disturb the workers inside the bank.

unfortunately your efforts are in vain, because you’re recognized immediately.

“ah, sergeant y/n! we were expecting that you would arrive soon. please, allow me to take care of your luggage.” calls out the receptionist, ekaterina.

not only does she practically announce your arrival, she does it while the very bane of your existence is present in the main hall of the bank, formerly distracted as he spoke to a blonde woman in the strangest garments you’ve ever seen and a uh… floating baby?

childe’s ears, no- his entire body, almost instinctively perk up at the mention of your name and he abruptly stops his sentence midway through to look over to the entrance, to you.

“y/n? what in the name of the tsaritsa are you doing here?” he inquires, eyebrows furrowed with the purest of confusions. that is until he remembers the traveler and paimon are still present and most definitely more perpexled than he is.

so he decides to save face before anything else.

“missed me too much?” childe adds cockily.

your eyes almost roll on their own accord. “whatever you’d like to tell yourself. unfortunately, they decided to station me here to help… stabilize the situation, surely that has nothing to do with you screwing up?”

he scoffs. “there’s been nothing to screw up. in fact, the situation is plentiful under control and we’ve already devised a plan to solve it. your intrusion is unneede-”

“wh- you big liar! we literally met after you kicked a bunch of millelith butt in broad daylight! we’ve been stumbling up and down these past few days just to clear our names.” the floating baby speaks up.

you cock your head to the side at the revelation with curiosity and just a smidgen of smugness.

“and you! don’t think just because paimon likes making fun of childe doesn’t mean you’re off the hook. we heard what the lady called you, you’re fatui just like mr. pants-on-fire over here. just who are you anyway?!” the floating baby glides over to you with an accusatory finger pointed and a suspicious squint to her eyes.

the blonde woman, who’s been radio silent this entire time, merely puts a hand on the floating one’s shoulder to pull her back, though she also looks wary of you.

childe laughs at the display and holds out a formal hand as to introduce you. “traveler, paimon, this is y/n, my.. coworker as you can obviously tell. don’t worry though, they’re not a bad guy or kind of a bad guy like me, you have nothing to worry about. they’re actually an amazingly talented battle medic and head nurse of the fatui, that’s why they carry the sergeant title.”

you’re taken aback for a brief moment at the unexpected praise. you were waiting for just a formal introduction of your position in the fatui, or even one that contained a little snarky comment about your attitude towards him. but no, he only complimented your talents. it’s almost a little too courtly too.

“y/n, this is the traveler and paimon. these two not from around here but they unfortunately managed to land right in the bullseye of the incident and are being considered murder suspects. i’m merely helping them clear their names.”

ah, there’s the kicker. he’s “helping” those two.

you know childe well enough to comprehend that he wouldn’t just help some strangely dressed bystanders if he didn’t think he could snake his way into benefit, in this case most likely the geo gnosis. that’s why he’s trying to make somewhat of a good image for himself and those associated. conniving bastard.

then again, takes one to know one.

“so it’s true then, rex lapis is dead.” you hum. “but why has the millelith jumped to the conclusion that it was a murder so quickly? what exactly happened in the rite of descension?”

“weeell, the ceremony was starting just fine and dandy when suddenly the sky got unusually dark and then- bam! thunder strikes and this huge amber dragon drops dead from the sky.” paimon explains dramatically before shivering.

“eugh… really gave paimon the heebie-jeebies… then, the tianquan went over to examine the body and immediately announced it was a murder.”

“interesting.. did the dragon seem to have any visible injuries? any slashes or punctures? weapons sticking out of his body?”

“it’s tricky to say, as i was just relaying onto the traveler before you arrived, the qixing have long since confiscated the exuvia and are refusing to let anyone see it.” childe joins in, looking down pensively with a hand on his chin.

“it feels too early to draw any conclusions but paimon can confidently say it was not us and our names are squeaky clean! either way, we should get going- we’ve done so much walking up mountains since we got here and it’s making paimon famished.”

“see, you keep saying that but you still float, paimon-“ you hear the traveler say as the pair turns to leave.

“oh shush, you!!”

the air between the remaining two of you is thick with awkwardness. you decide to be one to break it once the traveler and paimon are well away from earshot.

“so, how will your charitable little side quest tie into getting the gnosis?”

“hah, you’ve barely arrived and you’re looking so far ahead?”

“aren’t you? in fact, didn’t you say you’d already ‘devised plan to solve it’ and that my presence was ‘unneeded’?” you question, accentuating the quotings in your sentence with a less than half-assed impression of childe’s own pesky tone at the time.

“jeez, i do not sound like that-“

“not the point-“

“yes yes, whatever… for the record i do already have a plan.” he admits. “unfortunately for you, doc, it is a bit airtight and therefore- your interference is unneeded.”

“y’know what, you’re right. if someone like you is describing their plans as airtight then maybe it’s best if i stay out of its splash zone.” you bite back and childe scoffs.

“who even ordered you be sent here?”

the malicious grin grows on your face with haste.

“the jester.”

“wha-?! argh, that old man…”

—

“ekaterina?”

“yes- how may i help you, sergeant?”

“what would be your recommendations for restaurants ‘round here?”

evening was nearing and you could feel the emptiness eating at your stomach from the inside. the few days that had passed of your stay in liyue were remarkably unremarkable. half of your time was spent cooped up in northland bank with diplomatic or medical paperwork while the other half was you doing whatever discreet investigation inside the city that you could, up to little avail.

childe was moving forward with his scheming while effectively keeping you completely in the dark from it- well not completely, as he wasn’t the only stubborn one out of the two of you. some intel about his flawless, artful plan had “slipped out” (meaning you pried it out of ekaterina) and come to your knowledge- for example, today he’d be going out to meet with the traveler and paimon for another meeting with one of his… contacts, he called it. you just didn’t know where.

luckily your source of discovering that had just walked through the door.

“welcome, friend of childe! and congratulations on the first day of your illustrious career with the fatui.” ekaterina greets formally and you’re too late to stop yourself from visibly cringing.

“i have no intention of joining the fatui.” the traveler says curtly.

“you sound remarkably sure of yourself… remember, we are mere mortals- our ideas are fluid like water. only the tsaritsa truly has a will as solid as permafrost.”

you huff at the receptionist’s straightforwardness.

“i’m sure we can maintain.. beneficial connections without anyone signing away their names. why don’t we keep to the matter of this visit?” with a slightly forced business smile, you try to ease the traveler’s stone-like expression. thought, if you were in her shoes you believe you’d react much the same.

and you would sure as hell never recommend for someone to join the fatui.

“hm, yes, back to the matter at hand- childe tells me that he has upheld his end of your agreement.”

“what agreement? ..oh, the thing about him helping us find a guy?” paimon inquires.

“correct. childe promised he would find someone to break the stalemate. and harbingers do not break their promises lightly.”

this time you succeed in internalizing your reaction to the comment- from your personal experience, childe did not exactly fit that concept. but there was no time for dwelling on that now.

“ah, where is that guy anyway?”

“childe is currently at liuli pavilion.”

bingo.

“liuli pavilion?” you ask.

“oh, oh! paimon knows this one!” paimon exclaims, proceeding to give an insight of the rival cooking styles of liyue and you almost admire how dedicated she is to liking food so… academically. you’re half zoning out at their conversation when your stomach traitorously growls for all ears to hear.

“hey, y/n, why don’t you join us? you’re a friend of childe’s too afterall!” the floating guide propositions naively.

“ah err… i-i wouldn’t describe it like that, plus, i wasn’t invited to this meeting. i’d hate to intrude.” you try to wave it off. while this could be your current best chance at receiving more context on their investigation, you’d rather not do it where childe would catch onto you.

“well it won’t hurt to ask him! c’mon, at least walk with us, you’ll have to find a place to eat anyway.” paimon drags you by the sleeve out of northland bank, along with the traveler, with unexpected strength in her grasp.

the streets are bustling with people, walking back and forth as they also step out to guarantee themselves some dinner. the crowd covers the sight of liuli pavilion’s entrance and it’s not until you’ve actually arrived that childe sees you.

he looks no less than befuddled.

“aha, y-you’ve made it…” he laughs awkwardly, clearly not expecting the current situation to ever occur. “care to explain the plus one?”

“they’re just that! they were also looking for a place to eat so we invited them to join us.” paimon contextualizes, oblivious to the silent glare battle taking place between the two of you.

“w-well anyhow-“ childe effectively retreats from the as promised, i’ve found someone who can help you. someone who can solve the mystery of why the liyue qixing would hide the geo archon’s vessel.”

“so.. where is he? in liuli pavilion?”

“he certainly is. come, i’ll… introduce you.” he intends to sound cheerful but the last part of his sentence comes out the smidgen most strained as his eyes flicker to you momentarily.

“i took the liberty of setting up a business dinner, as per liyue custom.”

the traveler and paimon walk ahead and get distracted with the warm welcome of the restaurant’s staff while you and childe try not to jump to an argument then and there.

“trust me, i resisted this impromptu invite as much as i could.” you mutter, preferring to look at the surroundings rather than the harbinger beside you.

“good, because you won’t be joining anyway.” he replies coldly as he starts walking inside ahead of you.

“at least let me see the damn restaurant first, maybe i won’t join your table but that doesn’t mean i won’t eat there.”

“how will i know you’re not listening in on our busine-“

“childe? y/n? c’mon, let’s get to our table!” paimon calls out from further into the pavilion.

as you round to the reserved table, you see a brown-haired man in refined amber clothing seated at the far end of it, tea in hand. somehow you think you’ve seen him before but only out in the streets, perhaps at third-round knockout listening to the storyteller at the front tables.

“yes yes, i’m here.” childe steps up, half-sheepish at his late arrival. “unfortunately, y/n won’t be joining us as they have other matters to attend to.” he says like you’re not standing right beside him.

“really? but y/n didn’t say anything, plus, they seemed like they were awfully hungry-“

“forgive the intrusion but, childe, might this be the same y/n you’ve mentioned before?”

the man at the table joins in and childe looks like he’s promptly died on the spot. you, however, look elated at the revelation.

so elated that you don’t see the flush of red that plagues childe’s face and ears.

“why yes, i might just be.” the grin on your face seems only friendly to the other three and only the harbinger feels it’s real sting of triumph.

“then, please, let us all eat together.”

you all waste no more time to do so, childe sits on the man’s right, you sit beside him while the traveler and paimon mirror you on the other side- well, paimon at least floats on top of the chair.

“allow me to introduce mr. zhongli, consultant to an organization known as wansheng… and a trusted associate of the fatui.”

“wansheng?” the traveler asks.

“indeed.” the redhead answers. “wansheng’s line of work can be… sensitive at times. let’s just say they understand when discretion is needed. and we, the fatui, have always been glad to do business with friends who walk in the shadows.”

“w-walk in the shadows..?” paimon shivers.

“it is an honor to meet you. i have heard tell of you from mondstat.” zhongli turns to you. “you as well, doctor, i have been meaning to arrange for us to meet ever since hearing word of you from childe.”

you’re pleasantly surprised by him calling you doctor for a moment, as no one has ever really referred to you in such a respectful manner. sure, childe and others have called you “doc” playfully but never fully doctor.

and then you remember who the title is usually reserved for.

“discretion… shadows… ah! is wansheng some kind of business involving… ‘dealing’ with people?” paimon panics.

“indeed. it is as you have guessed.”

“ahh!!” she screams.

“don’t worry, wansheng is a funeral parlor.” you assure her amusedly and paimon’s fear shifts to confusion.

zhongli cluelessly nods in affirmation. “the wansheng funeral parlor organizes burials. we ensure that those who pass on do so in peace.”

“e-eh?”

you hear childe laugh warmly from beside you, the warmest you’ve heard from him in years. “did you think he was some sort of hired killer? the fatui calls many such people friends, but the wansheng funeral parlor does not dabble in such business… well, ostensibly.”

“ostensibly?” you question.

“well, they are still- ah, i shouldn’t say too much. in any case, i brought you to meet mr. zhongli because…”

“because i can bring you to see rex lapis’ vessel.” the consultant follows up plainly.

“what?!” exclaims paimon.

“ha, don’t be so surprised. sure, the geo archon’s body has been squirreled away by order of the tianquan ningguang… but first, let’s hear what mr. zhongli has to say, shall we?”

how childe managed to hide such a supposed fatui associate, an insanely useful one at that, from you with all the snooping around you’d been doing is beyond your mortal comprehension. what baffles you even more is his unwavering determination to keep you as far away from the entire operation as possible, going against the order of your involvement that came directly from not only dottore, the very second fatui harbinger, but also the director of all of the fatui himself.

unfortunately you’ll still need to wait until zhongli preaches his tale before you get to strangle childe where he stands.

“rex lapis may be the prime of adepti, but he is ultimately an adeptus. many adepti have left us over the millennia- this is the inexorable trend.”

zhongli turns to the traveler. “the times have changed- you must have felt it too when you were at jueyun karst.” with the travelers confirmation, he continues. “as you have seen, the time of adepti is ending, and the time of mankind is slowly dawning.”

the dinner proceeds with talks of the rite of passing and as the traveler and zhongli become more well acquainted, they all agree to leave liuli pavilion and further discuss their arrangements.

“you can go if you want to, don’t worry about me. i might just have a few more drinks…” childe dismisses the two travelers.

“and me also. somebody needs to teach a certain other someone how to use chopsticks if we’re to stay in liyue for a good while.” you imply half-jokingly, grateful that the two get on their way quick so you can give the redhead beside you an exclusive earful.

as you feel your cheeks start to warm with the burn of the alcohol, you down decisively the last one of your drinks for the night and slam the cup on the table with vigor.

“am i some sort of joke to you?”

childe almost chokes on his own beverage at the suddenness. “e-excuse me?”

“actually no, let me rephrase that- do you think it’s funny to play around with the job i’ve been assigned here and purposefully leave me to wander around streets i don’t know like a bumbling idiot while you keep contacts like mr.fucking-rex-lapis-historian under your belt?” you practically bark.

“y/n, please, i think you might’ve drank too mu-“

“answer the question or so help me celestia, i will leave this restaurant with my hands as red as that stupid scarf of yours.”

the harbinger huffs. “alright alright! no i don’t think it’s funny to do… all of what you said. but i don’t think that’s fair- this is my mission and it’s been running smoothly since before you even got here. at least i thought it was until they decided to send more manpower with zero forewarning, do you know how insulting that is?”

“how is it insulting to have backup in case something goes wrong? that’s all i’m here for- to help, and ideally help with the investigation. but i can’t do that if i don’t know where the hell jueyun karst is, much less where else to go to look for clues.”

childe only sighs again, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingertips. “you’re right… i shouldn’t alienate you from what’s your assignment too. but let me keep up with my plan for now and if something goes awry, i’ll call you. i’ll fill you in on it tomorrow morning.”

you nod firmly- easier than you thought it’d be.

“now will you please teach me how to use these damned sticks?”

taglist ; @kentply

#childe x reader #childe x y/n #childe x you #childe tartaglia #childe genshin x reader #tartaglia x reader #tartaglia x y/n #tartaglia x you #childe tartaglia ajax #childe imagines #tartaglia genshin impact #childe genshin impact #genshin impact fic #genshin fic #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin x y/n #genshin x you

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verystrxxwberry · 14 days

Note

Hello! I hope you’re doing well! I noticed your requests were open so I was wondering if you could write a headcanon for Eldarya about MC/Erika or whatever you want to call her giving the ANE guys attitude? Like being upset for whatever reason (that doesn’t necessarily involve them) and them having to handle her in some way? Anyways if you don’t feel like it don’t worry about it, I’m just glad you’re back!

ELDARYA; ANE routes when you’re upset

♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•.

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: sfw, ANE routes when you are angry/sad/unhappy. ↝ 𝐂𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: Hi, I am doing great, thanks for your words and request! I hope you enjoy these headcanons <3 and I am sorry if there is any spelling mistakes...

♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•.

NEVRA

The moment he greets you and you simply ignore him or answer in a not very nice way, he becomes worried and wonders if you had any trouble in your day. If he didn’t do anything to make you upset, he is aware of that and doesn’t tend to overthink. In fact, he goes after you and sits besides you, placing his hand on your back.

He got used to dealing with Karenn being upset while growing up, so he knows how to be patient in these situations.

He stays there with you and caresses your back. “What happened? Your pretty face seems mad.” He talks with a low tone to not stress you even more. And even if you don’t want to talk about it, he stays there unless you ask otherwise.

Once you explain to him what happened, he won’t act unless it’s a very unfair thing. He cares about you and he knows you are strong enough to do things on your own. He can give you advice and cheer you up to act, because come on, babe, go eat them up. In case it is something very unfair, don’t worry, he is gonna be there to eat them up too.

If it was his fault: The moment he realized you wouldn't like one of the things he did, he already started planning how to apologize. He can read your expression pretty well, and he feels bad when you look so drained. Why did he do certain things that he knew you wouldn't like? Ah, that's simply because he wasn't thinking. He was simply impulsive.

Don’t try the silent treatment with him because he is gonna be so needy for your attention at some point that he will cross his arms and sit in your lap -no matter if he crushes you- or lay down his head there and say “are you willing to forgive me?”, “come on, chill a bit and let’s talk”, “I won’t move until that moody face disappears.”

He is capable of pinching your cheeks to bother you, but it can only go two ways… good or bad…

He will not let you go until you feel better.

LANCE

He is genuinely confused and overthinks the situation. Why didn’t you accept his cheek kiss?- He has already done too much bad stuff to allow himself to hurt the one he loves the most in his current life. He’d be like “Uh, what did I do..?”

If it’s his fault, he is gonna search for the best way to make it up to you, because he has a mask to keep in front of others and being in a tense situation with you makes him not be able to focus on work. At first, he would give you time to be alone and not be so invasive. He probably did a mental speech of what to say to fix it for the last few hours, and when he feels prepared, he kneels in front of you and grabs one of your hands. “Darling, could you please listen to my words for a bit…? I want to be honest…” His voice is softer than usual, you can even feel that the authority and roughness he always speaks with disappears and there is a vulnerable side of him showing at this moment.

In case you forgive him, you would notice how he leaves a few kisses on your hand as thanks, without saying anything else. In case you do not forgive him.... well, he would leave a timid kiss on your hand and mumble "It's okay, I understand. I'll be patient." Although inside he's truly impatient to know if you forgive him....

He'll never do whatever he did to make you unhappy again.

If it’s someone else’s fault, he is going to talk with the person that made your day worse, or to reassure you with a hug -because he doesn’t know how to comfort too well with his words-. Put him on a leash because if he finds out that someone has done something bad to you, he won't hesitate to have a 'serious conversation' with them.

LEIFTAN

Being your soulmate, he can feel the anxiety that has formed in you at the moment when what has upset you happens. Even if you are far away, he is already thinking about what he will do when he sees you. Maybe you need your space, or maybe you'd like him to be there to calm you down.

Very patient, he has had to deal with Miiko's and Lance's anger many times -although sometimes they would get on his nerves, but Leiftan knows how to keep some serenity and calm so that things don't escalate to more-. So, he will listen to you and then give you the advice you need.

And don't be afraid, because whether it's his fault or not, Leiftan will never judge or devalue your reasons for feeling bad. Whether it's because of some insecurity of yours, some accumulation of stress or something, he's going to nod his head and let you let it go. You don't have to be ashamed of feeling negative emotions.

If it is his fault, it is most likely a misunderstanding or some minor action of his that has accumulated with the stress you were already carrying. He has no problem apologizing from the bottom of his heart and clearing up anything that was misunderstood. In case it was something external, Leiftan will be able to advise you.

And after speaking to you sincerely, he would lean towards you to kiss your head and caress your shoulder gently. "I encourage you to be more direct with your thoughts and not let them accumulate like this. When you burst out, you can end up hurting yourself and others, and you don't deserve to carry that pain alone by yourself." She would explain in almost a whisper, while pressing little kisses on your head and shoulders.

MATHIEU

He is concerned and a little bit paralyzed, not knowing how to act. He takes a deep breath. He is not used to dealing with his partner being like this. He approaches and hugs you from behind and asks “Have I done something to upset you?”, notoriously worried.

Mathieu genuinely doesn’t know what he did if it was his fault, so you should refresh his memory if it was the case.

And man, a pout appears on his face, feeling guilty of making you upset. "Oh, jeez... Forgive me." And his arms wrap around your waist, hugging you and burying his face in the crook of your neck. The most likely thing that bothered you about him was dealing with all his energy at some bad time, because Mathieu can be intense with his games and pranks. There are times when even if you tell him to stop his prank, he can keep it up, and many times throughout his life he has found himself in the situation of having annoyed someone by his explosive energy of happiness.

To cheer you up, he would leave you alone for a while while he goes to prepare your favorite food. And suddenly, from behind you would be caught by an arm that would drag you to bed. In a matter of seconds you would be wrapped in a blanket that surrounds your whole body except your face, and in your lap a bowl of your favorite food. Mathieu would hold you between his legs, letting you rest your back against his chest and saying. "Even if you are angry, have this delicacy as an offering of your forgiveness, your majesty..."

He would just stay there, hugging you silently -except if you bring up a topic of conversation- while you enjoy your meal. He will be happy to see you enjoying it, and even more, when you forgive him he will be very excited.

If it were for an external cause, his response would be "Oh, honey, I know the world is an unfair place...but let's try to cheer you up now and we'll figure out how to deal with it later." He's not much of a counselor, but he does know how to distract you from whatever negative situation you find yourself in.

✩; remember to reblog and like to support my content. I hope you enjoyed it!

#eldarya #eldarya headcanons #leiftan #nevra #lance #valkyon #ezarel #mathieu #headcanons #beemoov #: ̗̀➛ alex's eldarya hcs!

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mcverse · 1 year

Text

✧ Paring: Lo’ak x Human! F! Reader

✧ Requested: Yes/No

✧ Type: One Shot

✧ Word count: 2.8K

✧ Warnings: It’s flufff, & slight angst obvi, anxious reader is relatable

✧ Side Bar: I stayed up all night because this couldn’t leave my head

please keep in mind that all characters in my stories are always 18+, and although I can't monitor who reads my work, if you are not 18+ I advise that you do not engage in my page or stories.

Pandora was the only place you'd ever called home, but it was a complex relationship. Despite being born on the planet, you didn't belong to its native people.

Instead, you were technically aligned with the Sky People—a group with a history of destroying hope and leaving chaos in their wake. For years, they'd traveled across space to set foot on this lush, alien world and decimate its resources.

You knew deep down that you didn't share their values or their vision for the future. You couldn't claim them as your own, not when you felt such a strong connection to the vibrant, interconnected ecosystem of Pandora.

But that didn't mean you were exempt from the judgement of others. In the eyes of many Na’vi, you were just another outsider—a demon, no less—who was profiting off the exploitation of their world.

As much as they may believe it, they couldn't be more mistaken. You may not possess the same physical form as the Na'vi, nor the ability to connect with the planet through Tsaheylu, but your heart beats in harmony with Pandora, and you feel a deep connection to its magnificent beauty and delicate balance like it was a part of you.

You understood why the Na'vi were hesitant to accept you. They had been betrayed by the sky people before, and their distrust of outsiders was understandable. It didn't make it any less difficult, however, to feel like you were constantly on the outside looking in.

You suspected that Spider shared your yearning for acceptance. He had changed his appearance, donning the blue paint and attire of the Na'vi, to look more like a native. But beneath the surface, he was still a human like you, with all the limitations and flaws that came with it.

It was difficult to keep up with him, your mind burdened by the fear of being scrutinized and evaluated by others. The weight of that anxiety was suffocating, making it hard for you to venture out and visit Hometree, the heart of the Omaticaya clan.

As a result, you only made the trip twice during your childhood, opting instead to spend most of your time with the Sully children and Spider in the surrounding forest.

Perhaps it was wrong of you to feel content with your current situation, quietly existing without the formal acceptance of the Na'vi. You didn't want to pressure them into welcoming you with open arms, but at the same time, you longed to be acknowledged and appreciated for who you are.

Spider's approach of hovering in between acceptance and rejection seemed tempting, but you knew it trying to follow in his pattern wouldn't be true to yourself. You wanted to be seen as you truly are, not as an imitation of someone else.

This makes you feel incredibly grateful for the Sully kids, as they have become like family to you. Though you don't believe that Eywa sees you, you know that the Sully kids see you for who you are and accept you as a part of their group. You feel a sense of belonging and comfort that you seek out in the world, and you know that they will always be by your side.

Spider, what’s not to love about him? Growing up, you came to know him as your brother not by blood. There were moments he was annoying, as brothers do but he can also be fiercely protective of you, sweet, and comforting when you need it most. You know that he always has your best interests at heart and will do anything for you.

Your sister from another species, Kiri, was literally your best friend. You did everything together, told each other everything. It was a little worrisome or scare to those from the outside, with how in sync you’re feelings are and the ability to when the others down and need some cheering to do. They just didn’t understand neither of you.

Little Tuk wasn’t so little anymore but she was still your very your own personal cheerleader. You remember learning the term after finding an old yearbook from someone left behind, and it seemed to fit her perfectly. She always roots for you at your accomplishments, and loves making things for you just because she felt like it. To you, she is the sweetest thing on the planet.

The mighty warrior, Neteyam, was a strict and protective man even with you. Though you may not be blood, he never gave you a reason to consider otherwise. You were extended family, who deserved just as much watchfulness and guidance as his own siblings and Spider.

But Lo’ak was a different case altogether. When growing up alongside him, you saw him like you did Spider and Neteyam, just a friendly face who you could count on to be there when you needed him. However, things changed once you hit puberty. Your feelings towards him began to shift, and you couldn't help but think of him constantly, wondering what he was up to and if he ever thought of you in the same way.

Your feelings for him were string, but you were always hesitant to act on them. You knew that the idea of two different species being together was frowned upon, and you feared the backlash that might come from confessing your love to him. Kiri may have found your feelings for Lo’ak cute, but you found them repulsive and frustrating, as they consumed your every thought.

Through your fears and doubts, you longed to tell Lo’ak how much he meant to you. You wanted him to know that you saw his hard work and effort when nobody else did, and that you loved everything about him, even his five fingers and eyebrow hair. Sometimes you couldn't help but wonder if he saw you in the same way, but you never dared to find out, fearing the worst.

When Lo’ak completed his final rite of passage, you realized that your chance to confess your feelings had come and gone. He was now old enough to find a mate, and even though he hadn't done so yet, you knew that it was only a matter of time.

You pushed your feelings aside, burying them deep within you in an attempt to move on and forget about what could have been—if only you weren’t so scared, filled to the brim with anxiety and self consciousness.

Nervously you fiddle with your fingers, trying to compose yourself as you watch Lo’ak playfully wrestle with Spider. Did he ever notice the way you looked at him, how your skin would heat up every time he touches you or how you couldn't stop smiling when he was next to you? You had been trying to move on from these feelings for months, but he had a hold on you that you couldn't shake off.

It felt like you were hooked, reeled in, and trapped by your feelings for him. The phrase "sink, line, and hooker" had become all too familiar to describe the pull he had on you. You had fallen for him hard, and it was frustrating because the only other human around your age was Spider. Moving on to him would just feel wrong, for so many reasons.

You’re so lost in thought when you feel a tap on your shoulder and turn to see Kiri kneeling there with a smile on her face. She rubs your shoulder gently and says, "Stay out of your head, everything will be okay." Her words provide a small comfort, but deep down, you know that this love for Lo'ak will continue to consume you until you find a way to move on.

You thank Kiri for her kind words, returning her smile before stealing another glance at the two boys. But you are caught off guard when you notice that they are already looking at you, and quickly avert their eyes when they realize you noticed.

You feel a pang of discomfort in your chest as you wonder what they found so amusing. Spider is snickering and pushing Lo'ak away from him, but their behavior only makes you feel worse.

You can't help but wonder if there is something on your face, or if they are laughing at something you said or did. Kiri doesn't say anything, leaving you to feel vulnerable and self-conscious.

You quickly turn away, blinking away a tear that has formed in your eye. You know that you are being overly sensitive, but the feeling of being laughed at and excluded by the two people closest to you hurts deeply. You feel like an outsider, like there is some secret joke about you that you are not in on. The feeling is overwhelming, and you can't shake it off.

You excuse yourself from Kiri and walk off deeper into the forest, heart pounding harder in your chest as you continue. The lush green surroundings no longer holds the calming effect they usually do.

Instead, your mind is consumed with thoughts of Lo’ak and how he must see you. Do you disgust him? Is he aware of the way you feel about him? The thought of being the laughing stock of your closest friends makes your stomach churn.

You try to shake the thought off, reminding yourself that Lo'ak has always been kind to you, and he's never given you any indication that he thinks less of you. Then the memory of Spider and Lo’ak’s laughter at your expense replay in your mind, making you feel even more self-conscious. The thought of being the subject of their amusement fills you with shame.

You hate that every time he glances your way or speaks to you, you overanalyze every word and gesture, trying to decipher if there's any hidden meaning behind them. Why couldn’t you be born in a normal world with people like you? Maybe then the heartbreak wouldn’t be so severe.

Your chest tightens and tears swell up in your eyes when you come to a stop and lean against a tree. You try closing your eyes and taking deep breaths in an effort to calm down. You try to remind yourself that these thoughts are just your insecurities talking, but it’s hard to shake the feeling of being inadequate and unlovable in a world where people can’t come to do the opposite of that.

You were so involved in your own thoughts that you failed to notice someone come up behind you until the sun no longer shined down on you, and instead, it was a shadow. Ironically, it was how you felt at the moment - overshadowed by your own emotions. You sniffled a few times, trying to gather your bearings before turning to see who it was. You were shocked to see that it was Lo’ak standing there.

You quickly composed yourself, trying to wipe your tears away, only to realize that your ecopack mask made that impossible. You turn away, feeling embarrassed and more self-conscious about being caught in such a vulnerable state.

“Are you okay?” Lo’ak asks softly, stepping closer to you.

You can feel his warmth radiating off of him, and the proximity makes your heart race. You try to push those thoughts aside, knowing that they only lead to more heartache. “I’m fine,” you say, your voice coming out weaker than you intended. You look away in cringe.

Lo'ak doesn’t seem convinced and reaches his hand out to gently grab your chin. His warm touch on your skin sends shivers down your spine, and you feel your heart rate pick up as he guides your gaze up to meet his. It's impossible to avoid the intensity of his gaze, and for a moment, you're lost in his eyes.

But the weight of your emotions is too much to bear, and you break eye contact, feeling a fresh wave of tears welling up behind your ecopack mask. You can't bring yourself to admit the truth to him, to lay bare your innermost thoughts and fears.

As if sensing your hesitation, Lo'ak's thumb begins to move in small, soothing circles on your skin. It's a small gesture, but it feels like a lifeline, a grounding force in the midst of your swirling emotions.

"It's nothing," you lie, your voice shaking slightly as you force the words out. You can't bear the thought of burdening Lo'ak with your problems, not when he has so much else to deal with.

But Lo'ak is persistent, and his eyes never leave yours as he speaks, his voice gentle and reassuring. "It doesn't look like nothing," he says, and you feel a pang of guilt at the concern etched on his face.

You take a deep breath, trying to calm your racing heart as you gather your thoughts. It feels like an eternity before you finally find the courage to speak up, your voice barely above a whisper.

"I... I don't know, Lo'ak," you say, feeling the tears spilling down your cheeks despite your best efforts to hold them back. "I feel so conflicted. I don't know what to do with these feelings."

Lo'ak's expression softens even more, and he takes your hand, leading you to a nearby log where he sits down beside you. You feel the warmth of his body beside you, and it's both comforting and unnerving at the same time.

"Tell me," he says, his voice still gentle, but now with a note of urgency, "Whatever it is, you can always tell me."

You look up at Lo'ak, you can feel the tears pooling in your eyes, threatening to spill over at any moment. You see the concern etched on his face and can't help but feel a surge of emotion at the intensity of the moment. You feel like you're standing on the edge of a cliff, ready to jump into the unknown, and you take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself.

You know you need to tell him what's been weighing on your mind, but you're afraid of how he'll react. Will he judge you? Will he think you're silly or overreacting? You push those doubts aside, knowing that you need to be honest with him.

"I feel like I’ve had to fight all my life," you say, gesturing with your hands to emphasize your point, "For a spot that will never be filled. The Na’vi," you pause, placing a hand over your heart as you feel the tears welling up again, "they will not accept me, they will never see me. I'm tired," you say, shaking your head in frustration, "Lo'ak, I'm tired."

As you speak, Lo'ak listens intently, never taking his eyes off of you. He doesn't interrupt you or try to make light of your feelings, but simply allows you to express yourself fully. It's a rare and beautiful thing, and in that moment, you feel seen and heard in a way that you never have before.

When you finish, Lo'ak doesn't say anything at first. He simply looks at you with a mixture of sadness and understanding, his eyes full of empathy. Finally, he scoots closer to you until your shoulders touch, and he speaks in a soft voice,

"They are too blind to see, and that is their loss," he says, his gaze shifting away briefly before returning to meet your own, "But you, [Name], you are gifted, smart, and kind," he says, his voice full of sincerity, "And beautiful," he adds, his words causing a flutter in your chest, "So what if they don't see you? I see you."

You feel your heart skip a beat at his words. You can hardly believe what you're hearing. The man you've been in love with for so long has feelings for you too. You're overjoyed, overstimulated, and disoriented all in one. You manage to gather your thoughts and respond with a shaky voice, "I see you, Lo'ak." You reach out and take his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

A look of relief washes over his face, and a smile slowly stretches across his features. He leans down until your foreheads are touching, "That makes me really happy, more than you know," he says, chuckling softly as he closes his eyes, savoring the feeling of your warmth and presence next to him.

Despite the intensity of the moment, a part of you couldn't help but wonder about the future. "What about..." you start to say, but he interrupts you, opening his eyes and flickering them over your face, trying to memorize every detail,

“I don't know what the future holds, but I like you enough to explore this...what this is. I want to see where we go, together," he says, his voice serious and intent.

You stare at him, your mouth slightly open in surprise at the side of him he was showing. He sounds more mature, more sensual, and more goal-oriented than you had ever known him to be. It was a side of him that you found yourself instantly drawn to, a side that you hadn't fully appreciated yet.

Feeling your cheeks flush, you lean in and peck the inner corner of his lips, letting them lingering for a moment before pulling back, "I can't wait to find out," you whisper, your eyes locked onto his, feeling as though you were seeing him in a whole new light.

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whore-for-chris-evans · 1 year

Text

Labyrinth

Summary: You're not his first choice. But you realise you can't be mad about it. You don't have the right.

Steve Rogers x gn! reader (not dating though, they're...they were best friends), post Civil War.

[Warnings: angst (sort of unrequited love?), attempt at fluff (?), Hurt and not so much comfort, Sam is a good friend though.]

A/N: no prizes for guessing the reason behind the title. Also this is Stucky if you want it to be. Otherwise it isn't.

"You don't think he cares about you or me?"

"I never said that, Sam. It's just that..." You took a deep breath, "if you and Bucky both ended up in two separate situations where you both needed him, who do you think he'd reach first?" You stared at him, waiting for his answer, nodding and looking away when he remained silent.

"Y/N..." He started.

"He cares about us Sam. He really does care a lot. It's in his nature to care about people, that's what makes him so amazing." You sighed, wishing you felt differently about this. "It's just that...no matter what happens, Bucky knows perfectly well that Steve will always reach him when he needs help. You and me, we're another story. He will come for us, but only if and when he can. Bucky has the assurance of 'always'. We don't. We know deep down that if Bucky is in trouble, Steve will go to him first, and us second. We have to keep a backup for ourselves. Bucky will never need a backup."

A sudden realisation dawned upon him, and Sam watched you intently. He knew what was going on in your mind.

"I'm not mad at him for that, and I'm not jealous of Bucky. I swear I'm not." You continued, wrapping your hands around the coffee mug and shuffling closer to your best friend. "Steve and Bucky...they've known each other all their lives, they have a bond that runs deeper than that of lifelong friends. They're two halves of the same soul at this point. So I get it, all of it. I truly do. I just..." You drew in a shaky breath. "There's nothing to do about it really. It's good to prioritise people, else you'd be all over the place. Honestly, it's heartwarming too, watching the two of them with each other. I've never seen Steve smile more than he does around Bucky. So...it's okay. I'm okay. Or I will be. Whatever. It's fine."

Sam pulled you closer, wrapping an arm around your shoulders, then in his usual deadpan fashion, he dropped the bombshell.

"You love him."

You snapped your head up. "What-"

"We all love him, deeply. But you're in love with him."

Uh-oh.

You turned your gaze away from him, clenching your teeth to avoid crumbling. You knew he was right, but for the life of you, you couldn't accept it out loud. It would only hurt so much more. Sam, however, found all the answers he needed in your silence.

"I know what you're gonna say - I'm selfish, I'm crazy, and I'm overreacting. I understand that." You look down at your lap.

"Is that really what you think I was gonna say?"

"It's true, regardless."

"You know everything you're feeling is valid, right? You're not a bad person because of this."

"Still wish I didn't feel all of it. Sucks to have a heart."

"You should tell him."

"I can't."

"Not about Bucky. About you. He deserves to know."

"I can't tell him that either. Don't get me started on that conversation, please. I've had it with myself way too many times. Look, we're ex-Avengers, currently on the run. We have plenty of stuff to worry about, so this will fade. It only hurts this much right now."

Steve swallowed, trying to ease the tightness in his chest as he silently stood behind you two, listening to you talk. It all made sense now - you suddenly being short with him, refusing to let him come with you as you left for Budapest earlier that month, the cold shoulder you had been giving him all the time recently. He understood it all too well now; you were hurt. And you thought he might leave you alone to get to Bucky first.

Were you right though?

Steve used to pride himself on being dependable and loyal, but for the first time ever, he realised, much to his shock, that he couldn't answer that question with absolute honesty without knowing the reply would break your heart even further.

Uh-oh.

He sniffled, then cursed himself for it, because now you two were both looking back at him, Sam's expression being one of mild surprise and shit, and yours being that of pure shock.

"How long have you been standing there?" You asked, sharply, your voice hoarse.

"I'll give you two some space." Sam slid out of the vicinity quickly, his place now occupied by Steve's six-foot, two-hundred-pound frame.

"Look I'm sorry-" you stuttered out.

"If it's for pushing me away, then yes, you owe me an apology. Because that hurt." He said, doing his best to keep his tone level and calm.

"That...yes, that, and also-"

"Otherwise there's nothing to apologise for." He shot down whatever you were going to reply with.

You sat in awkward silence for a minute before he spoke up again, "Is it true, what Sam said?"

"Sam said a lot of things, Rogers." You said flatly.

"Do you love me?" He asked quietly.

You debated with yourself over the best way to respond to this, then shrugged nonchalantly. "No more than everyone else does."

That's a lie, even I can tell, Steve thought.

He patted your knee, making you look up at him, then stared deeply into your eyes. "Come here," he said softly, opening his arms.

You looked up at him with narrowed eyes, before giving in and letting him pull you into himself.

And that's when the dam broke.

"I'm so sorry," you whispered and he shook his head.

"Don't be, please, sweetheart."

"It's true," you croaked out in response to his earlier question, as you cried into his shirt. He rubbed your back slowly, resting his chin on top of your head while holding back his own tears.

The words were on the tip of his tongue. he was so ready and willing to say it and yet...it felt shallow when he said them aloud in his head. He didn't think telling you he felt the same would mean much in this moment. So he kept quiet, choosing to simply hold you instead, doing his best to physically comfort you.

Because as much as he hated to admit it...you were unfortunately right. Bucky was his number one, and even though you were an extremely close second...that's just it - you were, after all, second.

And no confession from him would take that away.

--------------------------------------------------

[I'm sorry too.

Please reblog and/or leave some feedback if you liked this. I'd appreciate it a lot <3]

@slut-for-chrisevans @royalwriteroftheuniverse @nana1000night @jamneuromain @nekoannie-chan @peace-love-fanfiction @simpforsupersoldiers @averageambivert @breethebee7 @teardrop-on-guitar @sarahrogersevans @hawkeyes-queen @patzammit @heli0s-writes @rodrikstark @steverogerssimpp @mainly-marvel

Image from Pinterest.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #steve rogers x gn!reader #chris evans fanfiction #steve rogers angst #labyrinth #sapphire rogers #Spotify

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queerpumpkinnn · 1 year

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Stain (Part Three)

2.6k words

In which Sirius realizes that he loves you in a different way than the other Marauders.

Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six coming soon!

Summary: Sirius is dealing with the trials that come with being in love with his best friend. It isn't terribly convenient, to say the least.

Pairing: Bestfriend!Sirius Black x reader

Warnings: light cursing, let me know if I'm missing anything

While reading, I recommend you listen to Songs I want to have a crazy epic love to - a Spotify playlist by me!

Sirius Orion Black had a reputation for his flawless nonchalance. He was known to be able to make anyone weak in the knees with just a look. He was used to knowing he had control of the situation, whatever it may be.

So why did he feel so beaten down lately?

He knew the reason. It had taken him a hell of a long time to figure it out, but with a verbal smack upside the head from the all-knowing Moony, he had come to a conclusion that, under the current circumstances, was sickening.

He was in love with you.

He had never regretted you. Never regretted knowing you. He'd rather die than be separated from you. But sometimes he wished he didn't feel like he was going to crumble when he passed you in the hallways, standing with the boy with whom you were in a relationship, for some godforsaken reason.

Jack. He was a good guy. But Sirius knew better than to believe that you were dating him because you were truly romantically or sexually attracted to him.

This was his repeating thought every time he saw the guy, with an eye roll and an uncharacteristically grumpy silence when he had the nerve to hang out with you and your friends.

James and Peter seemed to like the guy okay. Not that they didn't still tease you about his being a bland character with zero intelligence or distinct personality, but they grew to accept that you liked him and respected that. Remus did too, but with his unique understanding of Sirius' affections towards you he managed to stay away from potentially uncomfortable comments like those from the blissfully unaware Prongs.

Sirius has begun to dress himself up more, if that was possible. He had once said that to only leave a shirt half buttoned was tacky, but now he has come to embrace the statement. His eyeshadow was a bit darker, tongue a bit flirtier in speaking with his newfound (what Remus called) "playmates". Perhaps he was attempting to get your attention, notice that he was more attractive than Jack. Maybe he was trying to convince himself that he was sexy all the same, and that your rejection was your loss. It was probably a bit of both.

He couldn't tell if it was working or not. You weren't as transparent as he wished you were. While you weren't begging on your knees, Sirius was never fully convinced you viewed him as nothing more than friends who had had a fling a month ago. He saw something in your eyes when the two of you laughed together that didn't appear when you laughed with Jack. There wasn't the same endearment, the same attention, the same life.

He hated that he couldn't shake the feeling that he had a chance with you.

He knew his feelings. He knew it was gnawing at him that he was in love with his best friend and you were cuddling up to someone else. He knew you were off limits by way of being in an official relationship with someone else.

But he didn't know if he could survive going on like this. He wanted to be frustrated. He wanted to be indignant and proud and carefree. At least when he had that he was motivated to move on with his life. But under the facade he had so stubbornly forced up, there was an ache in his chest. A sucky, hollow feeling that made him feel like a pile of bones in a bag made of flesh, unable to move.

And of this he was constantly reminded, once again on an evening where, once again, in a Hogsmeade booth, was you, Jack, Sirius, and your friends. You were up under Jack's arm (per your pulling it over your shoulders. You'd mentioned before that initiating physical affection wasn't Jack's strong suit. You were happy to do that for him, you'd said.) Sirius was between James and Remus on the other side of the table, tired eyes trained on you and your boyfriend. You were playing with his fingers, to which he paid no heed, laughing at something James had said. Jack pulled his hand free to gesture while he adds to the conversation. A pang of dejection flashed in your eyes when you gauged no response from him, shifting in your seat uncomfortably.

What is this guy doing? Doesn't he know anything? Sirius thinks.

You noticed Sirius' eyes taking in the sight of you being ignored, looking away in embarrassment. You didn't like that it was obvious to him that Jack wasn't very thoughtful. You didn't like that everyone had been right about Jack.

It had been an odd predicament with Jack lately. Sometimes it was wonderful. He was great to talk to, funny. But some part of you felt like it wasn't complete. Like there was something missing in the relationship, like you weren't completely happy. And unfortunately for you, this was obvious. Particularly to Sirius, who you could tell was always biting his tongue to keep from making comments.

Speaking of Sirius, he'd been oddly distant from you lately. Still a kind friend as always, but he wasn't joined at the hip with you as he used to be. You missed it dearly. Could it have been because of Jack, you wondered? Did he feel he'd been replaced, left out?

"We're due back soon. Are we about ready to go?" James announced suddenly, bringing your attention back to the present. His question was met with general 'yes's and the group standing and placing sickles on the table.

On your way back, you found yourself falling behind with Remus. Jack had run into his group of friends and, after asking you, had trailed off with them.

"So."

You raised a brow. "So?"

"How are things?"

You knew what he was referring to. Were you really that transparent?

"You know, there's no shame in telling me anything."

"I know. Things are good. We've got some work to do, but that comes with all relationships I suppose."

Remus seemed not to believe you but didn't press further. He huffed a breath that billowed into a crisp cloud from his lips. He nodded to a person with long, wispy dark hair flowing around a beige coat and purple scarf as they came down the road from the other way. They smiled briefly before stopping to talk to Sirius, linking arms with him and falling into deep conversation.

You watched the link of Sirius' arms with the person. You'd seen them around school, they were a Ravenclaw in your year.

You learned over to Remus. "Who's that?"

He glanced at the person, then at you. "Max Telling. They're in Ravenclaw."

"I know that."

Remus gave you a look. "I don't believe they're an exclusive item, if that's what you're getting at."

"Playmates?"

"I believe so, but it's really none of my business."

"How do you know this?"

"James and Peter always ask when they see him running around with someone. He usually tells them."

You opened your mouth to give a silent 'oh'. You watched the pair trod up the hill. Sirius seemed happy. Your heart sank, for some godforsaken reason.

Your mind was elsewhere for the rest of the night. Even when Jack had come back to kiss you goodnight and Max had left to their own common room, you couldn't stop thinking about how or why you felt shitty. By the time the fire in the common room had dwindled and you were alone with a glass of water and your thoughts, you were still at a loss for a firm answer.

Sirius was along the same lines himself. He was well aware of his feelings, but they still tormented him. He didn't want to think he was better for you, that was a bit presumptuous- though Remus had validated the idea (this did not help Sirius suppress his feelings whatsoever).

His brain was a rainstorm when he decided to head downstairs for a clearer head. Quite the opposite was served to him when he found you curled up on the couch, spaced out. His heart clutched at the sight of you in the firelight, comfortable and thoughtful. He pushed the feeling away before shaking his head with a sad smile and sitting on the arm of the couch and poking the side of your head.

"How're you feeling, kid? You're looking a little out of it."

Your head turned slowly, dazed from the sudden redirection of attention. "I'm older than you. And I'm fine, just thinking."

"About?"

"I dunno. Something's just been off lately, I can't quite put a pin on it." You sighed, reaching to sip your drink.

"It's Jack, isn't it?"

You nearly choked on your water. When you regained composure, you set your glass down rather aggressively.

"For your information, Jack and I are doing perfectly fine." Not entirely true, but you'd die before you admitted he was right.

"Then why are you so apprehensive?"

"Because you and the guys and everyone else have been telling me that I shouldn't be dating Jack for whatever reason. Is there something about him I should know?"

"No. There's not much to him, really." Sirius shrugged, hands in his pockets.

You glared at him, standing up and placing your hands on your hips. "I'd appreciate it if you'd stop making comments like that. He's a nice guy and you're just going to have to get used to the fact that he's just not as exciting as you and that's fine."

"I don't care what he's like. I care that you're wasting your time with him. We all know he's not a good fit for you." Sirius pushed off the couch' arm, standing a few feet from you.

"For Merlin's sake, Sirius!" you threw your hands in the air incredulously. "Why is it that you're still on this? Everyone else has been able to come around on Jack!"

"Because they're not in love with you!"

Oh.

Christ.

"Sirius..." You felt yourself cave in to your own body, arms wrapping around yourself as the reality of the situation crashed down on you. He seemed to be at a loss for anything else to say, standing there shaking despite the warmth. His eyes reflected fear, breathing heavy and standing in a manner almost like a scared puppy.

You inhaled, choosing your words carefully. "Sirius. You're my best friend. And you know I care about you, so much."

"No..."

"But I can't return that."

Sirius' heart stopped right then and there. It sank into his stomach, throat clutching.

"You know that's not true." His voice was weak.

"It is. I can only be friends with you."

"Why?" Sirius' voice broke on that note, swallowing as if in an attempt to hold his composure.

"Because I'm dating Jack."

"Bullshit." He spat, turning to pace a circle before coming back. "You don't love him. It's obvious. I've seen the two of you."

You were taken aback at his change of demeanor. "That's got nothing to do with it."

"It has everything to do with it! You're not in love with him because you're in love with me."

"Stop it!"

"Think about it!" Sirius was beginning to regret his outburst. You were persistent in your stance, he was beginning to think he was overstepping. But he knew he was right. He had to be. Right?

"No, you think, Sirius." You pointed an accusatory finger into his chest, glaring at him. "You have no right to start making claims like that."

"Then prove me wrong." He held out his hands, exasperated though no less terrified than he was the instant he said he was in love with you. "Are you in love with me?"

You paused, watched him for a moment.

"If you say no, I'll drop it. We'll never talk about this again. But I need to hear it."

The look on his face made your lip quiver. Why did you feel shaken? Why did you feel less and less sure the more this argument went on?

A long pause filled the air, the tension thick. Your heart was pounding in your ears as you opened your mouth.

"It doesn't matter. I'm with Jack, and you should respect that."

"You didn't answer the-"

"Just stop it, Sirius!" Your hands were at the roots of your hair, attempting to let out frustration. Teeth gritted and tears forming in your eyes, blurring your vision as you stared with fury at the dark-haired boy. "You had me in the palm of your hand. For months. And you never did anything. Never made us anything more than friends with benefits. You can't just waltz back in and say you're in love with me the minute I'm dating someone else! That's not how this works." You turned on your heel, storming up to the girls' dormitory with a slammed door that made Sirius flinch.

What had he done?

Remus had heard shouting downstairs, but he hadn't paid mind to it until heavy footsteps came thumping up, followed by the door to the dormitory slowly opening.

Remus looked up, and part of him wished he hadn't. The sight made his heart hurt.

Sirius looked pathetic. His shoulders were sagged, hair uncharacteristically messy, likely from running his hands through it. His face was red and soaked with tears, eyes bloodshot.

"Padfoot." He breathed, dropping his papers and rushing to his friend's side. Sirius curled into Remus at first contact.

"I fucked it up Moony. I should've just kept my mouth shut." Sirius sobbed, clutching Remus' shirt. Remus rubbed his friend's shoulder, sighing.

"You told them?" Remus knew the answer. He knew Sirius couldn't just cry a little and get over it- he didn't blame the guy. The raven-haired boy needed to have a thorough expulsion of emotion and collection of thoughts.

"Let's sit down." Remus murmured, guiding Sirius to his bed and helping the boy lay against his shoulder. After crying and attempting to splutter out the story only to be hushed, Sirius finally told Remus everything that had happened between you and him that night.

"I think I was out of line. Maybe I read too much into it, I assumed too much." Sirius muttered.

Remus knew the truth. Sirius wasn't entirely wrong to say you were in love with him. He wanted to comfort his friend, but that wasn't his place to say. He sighed heavily, mulling over what to say.

"Well, you were out of line to make assumptions." He replied, slowly and carefully, "but I don't think it's unsalvageable."

Sirius looked up at the brunet with disbelief. "How? How, Moony, how is that possible?"

"Because you two are best friends. Give it time, then apologize."

Sirius stared at the bedpost, or rather, his eyes were pointed at it. He was lost in thought, playing out the scenario. Fresh guilt still gnawed at him, it was hard to picture a reality in which you forgave him.

Meanwhile, you didn't sleep a wink that night. You spent an hour or two fuming, pacing rapidly around the dormitory while you regaled Lily with the epic tale of Sirius claiming you were in love with him. The rest of your roommates heard your fury-filled voice and soon you had a small audience.

It shook you a little when Marlene and Dorcas simply looked at one another, then back at you, not sharing in your rage. Mary could only give you a sympathetic shrug.

You huffed, trudging to the bathroom to splash cold water over your face.

Why the hell wouldn't they side with me? He was out of line!

You tapped the edge of the sink rapidly, racking your brain. They didn't think he was right, did they?

Oh.

Oh Merlin, help.

@sleepybookworm21 @jack1n @turvi @louleele @fangirlofbooksandpasta @valvlry @an-naxiety @queerqueenlynn @vyctorya

Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six coming soon!

Sirius Black Masterlist

Harry Potter Masterlist

Main Masterlist

#sirius black fluff #sirius black x you #sirius black x reader #sirius orion black #sirius black #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black x reader fluff #sirius black x y/n #the marauders #marauders fluff #harry potter marauders #marauders era #marauders #hp marauders #marauders fanfiction #stain series

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disabled-dinos · 4 months

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Resignation & Disability

Something that non-disabled people really never seem to understand is that being resigned can actually be a good thing sometimes - it certainly is for me.

There’s this idea that being resigned means you're giving up or doomed or not trying anymore. That's tragic. Not inspirational at all 🥺 (/sar). But it's not pessimism; it’s realism.

Yes. I have given up on most of my childhood dreams and goals. No, I can't do anything I put my mind to. And no (despite being a somewhat spiritual person), no higher power is going to miraculously cure me tomorrow if I just have enough faith.

But this doesn't feel like giving up! Not in the traditional “doom and gloom” sense, anyway. It's freeing. It's such a relief to let go of what had become this huge weight I was lugging around, this standard I could never reach. I've released it and it feels so much better.

Being “resigned” to reality is healthy. It's quite literally depressing to continuously strive for something that is just not within reach, and to instead learn to be content in your current situation.

And I don't mean content in the “oh everything is sparkles and rainbows” sense. I mean, hey, if you can do that, that's amazing! Truly, be as happy as you can be! But I mean content in the “this is life, it kind of sucks but there are good things” kind of way. Acknowledge the bad, sit with it, but also note the good.

It was hard, and still is at times, for me to get used to just flat out telling people, “no, i cant do that.” Not, “I can't do that today,” or “Maybe next year!” but just “no.”

This is partly because it makes people uncomfortable; they feel the need to apologise for not realising, or propose that maybe i'll “get better,” or that i need to “keep trying!”

And you know the crazy thing? Maybe my health will change! Maybe I will feel better. But heck, maybe I'll get worse! And who does it benefit to dwell on the what-ifs? Because it's certainly not me. This is my reality now, it has been my reality for years, and I'm okay with that.

I do my best to enjoy the bits of energy that I have and to accept the lows. It's hard, i don't need to sugar coat it. But it's okay that I'm disabled and chronically ill. It's not fair, but it's okay, it's real, it's my life. It would be helpful if other people could be okay with my reality too; after all, it's mine - not theirs.

I think, at its core, it's not really resignation. It’s acceptance.

And for me that's powerful.

#disability #chronic illness #cripple punk #autistic #adhd #audhd #postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome #hypermobile eds #disabled #disability pride #acceptance #healing #fern talks about stuff #disability journaling

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venus-vampire · 1 year

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𝕻𝖆𝖈: one of the issues in your life that needs your focus and advice from the cards

───── ⋆⋅𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟏⋅⋆ ─────

Cards: death, the chariot reversed, temperance, 3 of wands, 5 of pentacles and the 6 of swords.

NOT Y'ALL NOT ACCEPTING CHANGES IN LIFE. Feelings of denial, stagnancy and dissatisfaction, “in your boring era”. Nothing's happening or coming to you; blocked manifestations. The advice I got for you is to be more balanced, more patient maybe with the mistakes of others. Let it flow, you can't control everything and every outcome. With the three of wands I feel like y'all are trying to escape this situation, as in not trying to deal with it. But the card right next to it it's the five of pentacles, so y'all need to accept the current situation, so you can finally move on into better times with the 6 of swords and temperance. Are you hung up on someone who doesn't like you back? The lyric that resonated was "Come back to me baby".

───── ⋆⋅𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟐⋅⋆ ─────

Cards: the queen of cups, the magician, 9 of pentacles, the hanged man and the high priestess

People who are really emotional, might have seen the moon and went right to this pile. Queen of cups, in tune with their feelings. I feel like you have a project at hand that you don't know how to tackle. It might be a job interview or something related to university. The 9 of pentacles makes me think it's something bid and positive, related to money. Perhaps an inheritance. From my point of view, y’all may feel both trapped and free with this situation, because even though it might enable you to do some stuff, it might prevent you from other things.

It has equally important pros and cons and that's what makes y'all be so hesitant in choosing. The advice is pretty simple with the high priestess; trust your gut, trust yourself, even if other people are like "no it's a wonderful opportunity, you shouldn't let it go".

───── ⋆⋅𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟑⋅⋆ ─────

Cards: four of swords, queen of swords, the moon reversed, 9 of cups reversed, the fool and the hierophant

Ok so, I believe this is an emotional issue/wound, unlike the previous piles. I feel like you have blocked emotions or hold grudges against someone from the past. It feels heavy. It's like someone hurt you before, and you still carry those awful sensations and memories with you. Feeling on the edge. You may think you are doing ok and that everything is fine, but it's not fine. The 9 of cups upright is like "I have these cups (emotions) under control" but since it's reversed it's out of your control, the cups are falling. All of this may make you physically anxious because it's too much to handle. However, at the same time you could act defensive, passive aggressive and ready to talk back when someone tries to have a conversation about it or point that issue to you. Dealing with this will allow you to enter a new chapter in your life, you’re going to be more adventurous and feel ready to live life. Advice is to go see someone who is licensed to help you, like a therapist of some sort. I honestly wish the best for y'all, the moon card is surrounded by dense energy and the reading felt that way too. Hope y’all will be able to find peace within yourself.

───── ⋆⋅𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟒⋅⋆ ─────

Cards: queen of swords, two of swords, the magician, 2 of cups, the fool and the moon

Pile 4, I feel like you have a difficult decision in front of you, one that's not easy and requires emotional understanding. I feel like you want to break up with your partner or situationship (I honestly think it's a current partner and not an ex because the music got more romantic all of sudden), and this person is having a hard time accepting the truth and may be using magick to make you stay with them. Heavy on that love spell or manifestation. You are aware of it to some extent because you're setting boundaries with this person, and in exchange it makes them think you're cold and heartless. I don't think you feel free or like you can be yourself truly in this relationship. "Is this who I really wanna be with?". The advice is the moon, meditate with yourself and genuinely contemplate how this person and the relationship is making you feel. Society is often like "you should feel this way when facing this situation", so I believe it's important to remind you that nobody has a say in your own feelings, because they're yours. Do some shadow work and have a self care night, you have such a sweet, soft and nice energy. Almost like cotton candy I swear to god.

───── ⋆⋅𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟓⋅⋆ ─────

Cards: 8 of wands, the sun, 7 of wands, wheel for fortune, 9 of pentacles, the hierophant and the tower

I was puzzled for a bit with this one because the cards were positive I struggled to find the issue. With the wheel of fortune clarified with the 9 of pentacles and the sun, y'all are going through a beautiful period in life. Like being on top of a mountain and being able to see the sunrise after climbing all the way up. Like winning first place in a competition, it feels that positive. You feel victorious, after all that hard work it finally paid off. This period of opportunities and good moments will continue, but I see some people who are trying to come for your happiness and your achievements. They may be extremely envious of you, so they might be sending you stuff like the evil eye, or straight out bad energy your way. With the 7 of wands, you are defending yourself against these people, but it may not be enough because the advice card is the hierophant, so you really may need to ask someone more experienced or older for help. I keep thinking about a teacher, like this was a school situation. I encourage talking to someone because behind the hierophant is the tower, kind of like a warning of what could happen if you don't. This energy feels bright and masculine, I was thinking martial energy. It was particularly strong at the beginning. I want you to know it's not bad/mean/rude to stand up for yourself, don't let anyone step on you or what you have accomplished.

───── ⋆⋅𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟔⋅⋆ ─────

Cards: strength, 6 of wands, 9 of wands, 5 of swords, the tower, the devil

Pile 6, you have to get hold of the control of your internal lion, your fears and instinctive behavior, since your lion is a strong one. You fear not being like the 6 of wands, someone who's valued in their community, loved, needed. You fear people abandoning you, leaving you alone. I feel like you already had your tower moment because of that behavior and you're trying to get back on your feet. You're trying to go back to how things were before, because the situation has changed and you no longer have the support you had before. You feel like you're fighting life with nobody by your side. You should finally face your internal demons and use that tower moment to stop being overly dependent on other people. The advice message is strong on this one, FACE YOUR OWN DEMONS. You need to walk through the darkness and unknown to be able to see the light again. I want to remind you that your shadow is still you, it's still a part of you. If you're not afraid of yourself, then you shouldn't be afraid of your own shadow. Our shadow plays an important role in our life, as much as our ego does. Good luck pile 6!

#brujería #collective reading #divination #tarot divination #pac reading #pick a pile reading #pick a card reading #pick a picture #pick a card #tarotblr #tarot #tarot reading

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soleilnomoon · 2 years

Note

Hello there, hope you're doing well!

If you're still taking requests outside of your current event, I'd like some headcanons or even a small drabble. Feel free to do anything

Basically: How Law handles being together with a strawhat s/o that can...hold herself in fights?? Someone who stands in the same ground as the worst gen and can beat his ass at any given moment :kek: would be funny if they're Luffy's older sister

Ramble starting here: reason for this is so Law can't really tell her what to do for her "safety." We've seen him leave his entire crew to protect them and caring someone who's not his subordinate makes the game different

Law knows the strawhats attract some crazy shit, he knows she's more likely to be protecting him. The fact that she's still loyal to her brother and willingly throws herself into danger is aiduJDHS frustrating. But at the same time, they're stronger and all he can do is wish they don't disappear one day

Fuck this is long..but anyway lmk if you don't want it and I'll request from your event

hi <3 i am doing good, i hope you're doing good too! i like the idea of someone being much stronger than law and him just... not being able to deal with it for obvious reasons 🥺️😭💓took a lil creative liberty with some things, but i like it; i hope you enjoy!

881 words, fem reader, sfw (slightly suggestive, nothing major), tiny bit of angst, tiny bit of fluff (just pretend), 18+, mdni; a lil scenario/drabble featuring our favorite, emotionally constipated pirate <3 alcohol mention, a lil bit of teasing on reader's part but that's just how it is. luffy makes a brief appearance.

in your most humble opinion, it can’t be considered arrogance if you really are strong and know it; it’s also not arrogant of you to boldly declare that you can handle the fleet of warships that loiter around the sunny while the others prepare the ship for escape; and, lastly, it’s truly not arrogant of you to leap into dangerous situations without assessing for possible outcomes.

what you consider to be perfectly normal and acceptable behavior, law sees as irresponsible, irredeemable, and foolish.

to put it plainly, you agitate him to no end.

as someone who prides himself on making sure that the choices he makes do not wholly impact those he cares about, he finds it jarring to see that you don’t necessarily think the same way as he does. you’re not quite as reckless or as simple-minded as your rambunctious captain — who, to law’s horror, also happens to be your younger brother — nor are you as cut-throat as the swordsman who serves as the vice-captain of your crew, but you’re right up there with them.

three idiots who don’t care how things are done as long as the outcome is favorable.

on the surface you don’t look like you’d have the same monstrous strength as luffy — but you do. not because of any devil fruit, but because that’s just how you’re built. you were both born to be free — wild, even — scaling and navigating the depths of dangerous jungles as children. law understands the level of savagery that you needed to cultivate to survive; the only difference is his survival was contingent on enacting revenge, and yours wasn’t.

everything about you should annoy him greatly; your laugh, your outlook on life, your impulsiveness, your ability to make him forget that he’s supposed to dislike you. it bothers him that you get along with his crew without even trying — they love your quirky humor and that you disrupt law’s peace in a way that they could never. shachi and penguin nudge bepo repeatedly, snickering loudly, while the latter does his best to ignore just how funny it is that law keeps fuming in your presence.

it’s only after law shoots them a sharp look that they shut up immediately and walk away.

“funny bunch,” you say absently, a knowing smile on your face as you proceed to be the worst nuisance the universe could ever send him.

at a certain point, after seeing your interactions with the hearts pirate captain, where it’s painfully obvious that you belong more with them than you’ve ever belonged with the straw hats, luffy suggests you tag along with law.

there’s strength in numbers, he says sagely, in between bites of food; your laugh is soft, but genuine and you doubt your younger brother even realizes what he’s said to you. there aren’t any tearful goodbyes on your part, and luffy decides on holding a large celebration in your honor — that law finds absolutely unnecessary, but begrudgingly attends — where you drink until your face flushes for the duration of the night.

on board the polar tang, you ask law a lot of pointless questions, sit way too close to him; your curiosity is unparalleled, unrestrained, chaotic, especially when you do things like stray from the plans he’s carefully laid out, or jump onto an enemy ship without even thinking twice.

that level of recklessness — what you call fearless — will get you killed; he knows that all too well, has seen what happens when someone dares to fly too close to the sun; someday someone will clip your wings and halt all of your madness.

so, why is it that he’s found himself much more at ease the more you’re around; why are you the rare exception to his rule — where he vehemently refuses to let anyone else inside his heart, the fear of losing them much greater than any hope he has of keeping them — and why does he find himself constantly looking out for you, where he ensures that there is no plan that doesn’t guarantee your safety.

you get in the habit of telling him time and time again — mostly late at night while the others are sound asleep, in between soft, playful kisses that you press against his knuckles, cheeks, and lips; ones he pretends he doesn’t like, despite reciprocating — that you’re fine, great, even. you don’t need protecting; and while law knows that, he hates that he can’t do that for you.

thankfully for him, you don’t throw it in his face; if anything, you’re just glad he’s alive, regardless of who protects who. you say as much when you openly hug him in front of your crew mates and enjoy how his cheeks flush lightly at the contact; when you hop on his lap randomly and steal bacon off of his plate in the morning; when your lips ghost along his jaw, making him forget whatever worries he has as he attempts to stay focused while reading.

he’s come to accept that you cannot be tamed, and you’ve come to accept that his pessimism isn’t wholly unwarranted, that you can stand to be a bit more careful, and that if you want law to live a long, fruitful life you should stop leaping into dangerous situations without thinking a little.

#fic request #one piece imagine #one piece hcs #one piece x reader #one piece x y/n #one piece angst #one piece fluff #trafalgar law #trafalgar law x reader #trafalgar law x y/n #law x reader #law x y/n #law fluff #law angst #i wish law could do better but...

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grahamcarmen · 7 months

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What do you like most about chase, shadowsan and gray's arc.

i think this counts as long,...

follow me under the cut anon!

CHASE

I was thinking perhaps that i did not do it alone- for chase

concise way to show his understanding by repeating julia's words, which means he also accepts that carmen is a force for good and helped on this case, and even gives some positive feelings towards zari who is his current partner. 3 in one appreciation and understanding. and one that leads into (for me anyway)

"I really hope chief's plan works."

so back in s1 when chase felt out of the loop, he kinda blew up, took it so personally, and out on julia. and its not a flaw that he's unaware of even if he decides to still ignore her input (you're only good for wrecking cars and bullying your partner!). and as much as i appreciate that he's no longer jabbing at her love for art history in particular i'm also glad that he's gotten to a healthier place of being able to express that worry so simply to her by the end of the show. he's not the only one on this case and if he's caught not really listening at the moment it's not from resentment that he might be being made the fool with the situation. he's supporting chief's plan, he's listening to julia happily go into her facts and things, and when he feels worried it doesn't get wrapped in resentment (wow julia is chief's FAVE, carmen is doing MY job better than me) but a much healthier expression of his own doubt especially with the goal in mind, without compounding that into doubt in himself. helping someone he doesn't quite know. he hopes it works! he really does! he's worried! and he tells julia that! simply and truly. idk i think that's neat. chase has always had some really cool traits and abilities (he survives so many body slams lmao/found vile island and chased down for one to ones with carmen a lot/and can be absolutely fearless in tough spots like god..he tried to fight that mind blender/XD sorry i LOVE that boars and truffles line its perfect) but they've been overshadowed by how abrasive he can be at times. and that one moment of it clicking in his brain and working with his team members let so many of those traits have more time to shine! [woo pyramid smack down]

--------------------

SHADOWSAN

SHADOWSAN going from only knowing how to stop carmen from not doing the bad thing to seeing her carve a decent and good path and FOLLOWING HER!

like the coat was empty is like thee line lol but shadowsan after crossing the line by stealing from his own family and narrowly choosing not to hurting his sibling, and not killing her as a baby, and not letting her join a path she wasn't suited for. that's a lot of NOT doing the worst thing but also not having an active choice to do and be better. He was still on that island being faculty and used uhh not the best tactics to dissuade carmen from it.

until carmen decides to leave and he almost leaves with her! and when he can he makes reparations to his sibling. AND THEN HE DOES FOLLOW AND LEARN FROM HER!

It is I who is the student and you the master - shadowsan

andGOD he's actually that commited to learning to be better because that first apology to his brother HURTS. no excuses. it rights the wrong but doesn't heal the hurt yet.

I'M SO GLAD WE GOT SHADOWSAN AND HIDEO REUNITED EVENTUALLY EVEN JUST TO ACCEPT THAT not now but later still have work to do!!!

and that some of that work is that he's still not totally without the need for a structure much like zack and ivy need a home, his communication issues initially (zoom zooms away), and keeping information from carmen when its actually what she needs the most, BUT he's learning and each time him and carmen's bond strengthens and he gets more confident in his place in team red and their mission which he absolutely believes in and it gives him so much hope

and back to the question that always haunts carmen he goes from someone who can only take out the dollar bill from his coat so she can't have it, to someone who does have something hidden there.

her connection to her past :( what actually matters to her and he shows the widdledoll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

its a steady road down [what a great backflash story progression], a lull at the mIddle while resisting things that would probably make him condemn himself more fully to VILE, and then just running for that GOOD LIFE! ONE HE CAN BE PROUD OF! and someone he can be proud to go back to hideo as :{{{ go ninja grandpa go.

GRAY/GRAHAM CALLOWAY <3<3

that he's in love with carmen <3 aksdjnfaskfnllsdjfknd

jk jk here i go

er. maybe how such a softie he actually is even when surrounded by saturday villainisms. this always pops up whenever he shows

like i don't think either of his intro's do him any favors lmao (snarky lethal hello or makes fun of someone he doesn't even know) but the way he almost immediately melts into someone who DOES care about attachments, someone who can be poked at to flinch morally(ON THE TRAIN HE!DID! I WON'T TAKE ANY REVISIONISM TODAY), shows a past of constantly being so expressive and supportive for someone else's sake, moments of pulling from the kill move, and betraying that he's a touch insecure with no way to tether that so might as well be what he knows about himself (the greed, the order follower, someone who knows how to cut his losses and suppress any possible remorse for what "needs" to be done)

BUT... that's not who he is wholly. and putting carmen in his proximity reveals that his worst parts aren't all he is, and that he actively accepts his worst choices while rejecting the softer sides of himself, whether that means refusing to be that softer self or refusing to acknowledge its existence matters (and SOMEONE *cough cough* cares about that).

and he's been doing this for a while. like he was a practicing criminal before asking to join but one little interaction with blacksheep let out some of his absolutely SOFT faces and capability for genuine care for someone else spill out a little

he can be absolutely ruthless and that's horrible but he's also got a terrible pokerface because its a scary one but it can't stay up as long as he needs it to whenever we see him. [that's how we catch him lacking for all these pics *_*]

his mean spirited comments turns to protection and friendship

his capture mission turns into a sentimental reminiscence almost immediately

all his pragmatic deal making tendencies are used for something ultimately self sacrificing

being cruel, being greedy, being ambitious, it comes so easily to him he thinks, that its so...something, that being protective, being supportive and sentimental, being self sacrificial also is in him and...it just feels like he's stomping it out on purpose. like duh. VILE agents aren't nice people so doing evil easy things without caring what gets lost is their thing...but it feels...so weird in his case...especially with the way maelstrom tries to edge in that its just "nature"...like

gray big believer in i can make shitty choices all by myself !

doesn't mean they're not choices.

and if we're talking about instincts suppression...

i guess that how it feels seeing him love carmen and try to pretend he doesn't. that it doesn't matter. never did.

...except it does.

gah dude like the way he goes from little :( to hardening back up [I SAW YOU WE ALL SAW YOU]

at least he always has and understands VILE. he's not even half bad at it. why shouldn't he be the guy he's always been? the person he's already committed to being?

...its "easier" no? its a more permanent state of being that gels with his personality, right? its...fun.

he could probably act like its fun forever...couldn't he?

so why not give into THESE instincts* if that's what they are?

[side note: success as a goal tangent idk where to put it so...success...i -maybe tomorrow maybe only in my head]

and by the end i can't say he's totally escaped his current mindset yet but he has gotten to the point of letting his protective nature pop out. it doesn't matter if gray is or isn't a great person. this is what he needs to do now and he's gonna do it. that crackle rod is stun mode only, carmen is outta this stupid isle, and this new chance will be filled with different choices

because he actually can't keep this up as long as he thinks he can. NOT WHEN SOMETHING IS THERE REMINDING HIM WHAT HE'S ACTUALLY LOSING.

gray doesn't inherently moralize what he is anymore [if he ever did to the extent maelstrom thinks VILE agents should] and focuses on what he needs to actually do.

:) the right thing.

so er...specific moment wise. the crackle rod is a good twist. it doesn't undermine the consequences of the decisions made with it in the finale. no one asked him to make it and it affects only civilians who might have crossed his path+ him...and as his own choice it helps facilitate a true new chance

I die on the hill that anytime he shows protectiveness in his amnesia state it counts because he actually IS LIKE THAT OK. he's just telling that side of him to shut up because its not needed now. and it popping up in his non amnesia states is proof <3

and i like that his smirky nature, his shady deal making ways, and directness of action still play a role in his redemption. also the fact that he can't stand sitting still (emotionally or physically)!

he's still him XD

he's just making a choice that calls for him to be what he thinks he isn't capable of being/doing, kind and willing to go to great lengths like carmen with a greater goal in mind....hahaha EXCEPT YOU ARE CAPABLE YOU GOOBER. [sorry the SID lyrics]

And if you believe in the importance of choice...^^

and listen...i don't think gray's arc as is? is done yet actually... i hate it here.

but aaaah he's so fun :D !!! i can't help it my dude little dude!

and i love him a lot <3

TLDR:

I like that chase has a lighter worry moment

I like that shadowsan reunites with hideo and actively is as good as he admires carmen for being

And I like that gray exists. ♡

#asks #sorry this is late!#i was hmmhmmming what i should actually put down #that's 3 arcs...#and gray is still on that hot dog roller at 7/11 #like...a little dude #this was hard because sdkjfnasdkfj because i just went i like that they have arcs :3 #you were there i was there we watched. this show . lmao i'm sorry #edited it like 5 x ill hit publish because i dont wanna look at this anymore #because i feel like i haven't said everything or said it wrong but T-T guys i just wanna -go asdkjfnaskfjnasfkjnkd #that is like the legally accepted reaction i reserve as a right for casual fannism #alhjdfnaskdlfnasd f look at the dude named grayham

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jaycrakhead · 7 months

Text

Gauche x Grey (Greyche analysis) PART 1

(not me promoting my art as the cover)

Heyaa So, the purpose of this analysis is just...I don't know I was bored KQKQOWK and I’ve been wanting to make an analysis on these two with manga and anime info (besides personal opinions) for a while now; It's just my take, you don’t need to agree with anything I’ll be saying. I just wanted to talk EDUHUEID- This will have two parts, since the first part is pretty much a non romantic analysis and it already is too much text to deal with EIUDIOEDHDH shit gets serious on the second part. Of course there will be spoilers for anime and manga- (NOTE: I won't go into terms and name meanings since I believe it's already talked a lot so yeah. Sorry if there's any mistakes, I'm just a bro talking about Greyche) WELL TO GET STARTED, BRIEF INFO ABOUT THEM:

Gauche Adlai, member of the Black Bulls, fallen royal, ex convict, possesses Mirror Magic and has an extreme obsession with his younger sister Marie Adlai. This obsession often leads to comedic or just cringe situations. (or just people starting to hate him in general) I think his "character purpose/lesson" (idk how to put it) is about "trust" and "protect". Especially about learning to trust others and creating bonds with other people, because not everyone will betray him. People aren't the same, and I get the feeling of trauma where you are backstabbed and therefore your defensive levels rise and your trust levels lower. It's fucked up and with his background is even more fucked up. But it’s all a life learning experience on “how he can trust others besides himself (and Marie)”. Well he a tsundere mf MAKQLQOW just joking (or not) I also think his "character purpose/lesson" is about "taking a look at others besides himself (and Marie)". [inserts mirror brigades]

Grey, true name unknown, member of the Black Bulls, Cinderella backstory, shy and socially awkward that struggles with self-esteem af. But it is understandable do to her back story. She was believed to possess Transformation Magic, but later on Owen called it "Transmutation Magic". Personally I like to call it "Fairy Godmother Type of shit" I think it suits it pretty much. Well, she used to hide her true form and walk around as a big ass scary dude, because she feared to not be accepted by others due to her true appearance and so on, so she chose/embraced that appearance because it maybe reflects on how she sees herself after all. I think her "character purpose/lesson" is like about overcoming her insecurities and actually let herself see her true self for what she truly is and not what her fears, her abusive family and insecurities showed/show her to be. Basically "taking a better look at herself".

I think both of them have their issues just so rooted since they were younger and that's why it's so current on them. Gauche's obsession and trust issues and Grey's terrible self-esteem and lack of confidence. Both MIRROR (hehehe) their "character purpose/lesson": Gauche needs to "take a better look at others besides himself" and Grey needs to "take a better look at herself"; Besides of course how ironic it is for Gauche to have Mirror Magic and Grey having a complete messed up pov of herself. I can see both trying to be the best versions of themselves. Grey always trying to improve, and Gauche working on his rude behavior and actually showing to trust and protecting others. And of course they pretty much mirror each other in moods. So, before talking about their moments of this first part, I just wanna say: 1) I'mma cover their moments but I won't do a complilation of all their frames together just... breathing side to side. I do want to state that they are framed together A LOT so keep that just in mind; 2) I also wanna say that I have a little theory that Gauche might have ironically self esteem issues too (not so high like Grey but there's something sus there). Like he seems conscious of his attitudes and on how he is a bastard that “shouldn’t even be saved” by his friends. Like he seems to feel guilty about it idk. Besides that, something caught me and it is probably nothing BUT he states that he has been hiding his left eye before he used the mirror tool for the first time and I can't stop thinking that he finds it creepy idk why. Also I wonder the story behind that mirror tool. 3) And finally about their Grimoires, I do see the mirror detail on Grey's but Gauche's, I don't see at all that theory where it is a "wrapped present" or something like that. I don't have a firm opinion on what his Grimoire detail might symbolize but I think both are mirrors, Grey's has no reflection and Gauche's has. But I’m not really sure.

WELL NOW LET'S BEGIN

Before the Seabed Temple arc, I don’t think there’s something relevant at all to be talked between them as that Grey’s true form wasn’t even revealed yet. If I'm wrong and something relevant happened comment on it please iujiorfjrf- However at the Seabed Temple arc:

(Chapter 66) I think their fight agaisnt Zarick (the aftermatch) is really funny and showed good dynamic and partnership between them even if Gauche ordered around. A funny first actual interaction to show us DEHUDHE Also thanks Grey for giving us goofy Gauche.

Also I love how Grey is willing to kill UDEIIDHIUED YES SIR LET'S DO IT The piggyback ride is also iconic Okay now the highlight that is "actually relevant", the compliment and the infamous "Gauche blushed" "He nosebleed before pulling the picture" and yara yara

Well, Gauche compliments Grey's magic which makes Grey go doki doki, since she probably didn't get complimented at all before. She of course took to heart that compliment to her magic, but since it came from Gauche (due to all the backstory where he is envolved) she takes it even more to heart. Also It's funny whenever Gauche is sincere he looks away from everyone udieuduh I just wanted to comment on that because same.

Well, the transformation starts to go off, Gauche believed Grey was just that big ass scary dude walking around, and then PUFF Grey's true form revealed.

Truly I don't think Gauche either blushed or nosebleed at her before pulling the picture. idk how debatable is that but to me he just didn't. And it is okay HIEUDHIUEHD. If he pulled the picture as an excuse? I don't know, I don't believe it either... only when I see it. I think it was too early for something and well Charmy comments on how he isn't looking at Grey at all. At this early point in the story not even Grey wanted Gauche (or anyone really) to look at all at her as she says (or admits to herself) later on. So I think it's pretty much "balanced" for something in it's early stages?

If it matters he was at least listening to the conversation but that still doesn't say anything at all (at least to me), it's sus of him caring enough to listen? A bit, but mf was right there so yeah it would be natural for him to hear. I just think they were still building up just partnership, and it's totally fine. If you disagree and Gauche showed interest, it's fine too <3 After that in the anime they are there, but it's not relevant at all. And for this arc is basically it. At the Royal Knights Arc, during the exam in the anime, they are pretty much just there or framed besides each other but that's pretty much it, honestly they play a bigger part later on. But I felt like mentioning.

(Chapter 138) We are now taking a look at the AWKWARD TRIAD

Again it's all about more partnership rather than any romance or such between them. And of course partnership is impoortant as fuck too. Which is nice to me see that partnership before anything else, sorry if I like the slowest of the slowburns. Well Gordon and Grey struggle to well… socialize as they are the three "equality quiet friends" (As Gordon refers it, but to me they are just the AWKWARD TRIAD). In Grey's anxious pov, she states how she should try to be more herself since her comrades see her as one of them. Then she says in a smaller speech that "Even Gauche" complimented her, and that's basically an encoragement for her to try to be herself since even THAT STONE HEARTED GUY complimented her DIUEDHIUHDIHE kidding Since Gauche is rude and has a defensive posture towards everyone in general it is kind of a "reassurance" for her that if even him said something nice, then it must be okay. Grey pretty much sees a good side to Gauche despite his behaviour that himself sees as something bastard of nature.

Well Grey picks up her big balls and tries to make conversation with Gauche. Gauche is just... Gauche and well it's funny UDEIUDHe

Then shit is about to get real at the hideout,

and we all know what happened next. Gauche won't be playing anymore after that. also I wanted to state that

Mf just didn't went to bathroom through the whole thing UEDUDIU sad ;-;

(Chapters 139-140) So shit breaks out at the hideout and we have the awkward triad working together. We have just mainly small Greyche moments of them. Like the fact that (as we knew) Grey took to heart what Gauche said and that made her learn really quickly another spell. (It took her 5 years to learn her first one) And so on, I also think (I hope I'm not mistaken) that in the anime they talk at the same time a few times but I'm not sure, however it's just funny nothing really OMG.

also this is also funny:

(Chapter 141) We have Gauche encouraging Grey. She is of course doubtfull she can transform something big as that salamander and Gauche reasures her that it will be fine and they look at each other. I was going to say "He tells her to look at him" but "they looked at each other" sounds more meaningful.

aaah the brigades. We have one of the first Grey Mirrors Brigades, since he seems to mirror brigade her a lot through the story. I feel like I've seen it 20 times which I know i didn't but it's the feeling. Which in strategic purposes it's great and all but this is a ship analysis so SUS

and that's pretty much it for this arc Elf Reincarnation Arc:

(Chapter 149)

I just wanna comment this small detail. On how sus it is to put Grey there in frame. Not to say that it means a lot because to me things weren't really romantic until the timeskip, but it's just sus. And I wanted to comment on that. Doesn't make sense at all to include her if it wasn't something to become sus. Maybe Grey was framed there just because, but it wasn't necessary at all specially since Gordon would look more likely to be framed there at that distance. It's just sus, it bothered me while reading IDEIUHDEIUDH. I WAS VENTING

BUT HEY

THEIR FIRST KISS UHDEUHDH It's just so funny to me also sus that he should have hit Gordon's forehead SINCE HE WAS IN HIS FACE, but hey here's their first kiss. Thanks for stepping back Gordon, you are a true bro.

Well moving on (and yes I'm not talking about the fight at all because well sure Grey was fighting for him like everyone else and she didn't want to lose any of her friends) Here's the thing, where Gauche thinks of himself as a little bitch that should be left behind. And despite that they still consider him basically family, and of course despite not being shown, we know Grey still sees a good side to him too.

and next, the main panel that makes me say that his "character purpose/lesson" is to look at others, especially those 3. I find it meaningful Asta saying "Look at us" since "Look at me" is Gauche's line.

Well for that arc it's basically all, after the last thing mentioned they are just framed side to side.

However when they return, I DO KNOW the Return episode, is filler but I really wanted to comment on how Grey called Gauche a wall for her to hide EDIUDHEIUHD And he took it personally IDHIUEHD

Okay MOVING ON For the last part of this first part of the analysis

(Chapter 223) Well Yami implied them all are friends or get along at least, (I know if I don't mention it somebody might point it out) On the anime, Gauche comments on things Grey says like the fact that she is feeling overwhelmed at the thought of being cursed by someone she doesn't know, but focusing of the "person she doesn't know "part and he is all like "THE PART OF BEING FUCKING CURSED DOESN'T SCARE YOU?" Now at Gordon's House Gate, Grey clings to Gauche and he doesn't seem to be comfortable at all, but well it doesn't matter since later on it's just another day for him EUDEdh And Grey clings and hides behind him whenever she needs. I like the fact that in the anime Asta looks at them all like "What the fuck is going on here?", you can still see him looking at them in the manga but he looks so awkward in the anime IEHDIUEHDH

Then at the Agrippa family dinner I find it hilarious that Gauche feels awkward (such an achievement) and he whispers to Grey telling her to say something, like she would even talk UDEIDHEUHD on the first place EIDIHE well at least in the anime he took care of the weird shit Gordon's sister gave Grey.

Well here's a cute panel

WELL GUYS we've reached the end of the first part. The second part will include actually more analysing on things since shit starts to get serious from now on. I wanted to look at things from the early stages and since they are a side ship there's not that much to look at before what's upcoming so yeah. (I mean there's A LOT to look at since they are framed a lot together, but actual things happening it a bit less on this part at least) NEXT UP -Episode 150 -Rest of the storyline until chapter 368 -The Movie -Probably me just rambling about them

I hope you liked this It's just for fun <3

#black clover #gauche x grey #gauche adlai #grey x gauche #greyche #grey black clover #black clover anime #black clover manga #ship analysis #character analysis #part 1 #ship #ship review #this took me so long

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xexiar · 7 months

Text

God! I’m currently working on explaining this blasphemy!

First read around I understood why and thought it was entertaining. But going back on it, this was unnecessary. It’s causing more harm than good. It paints him as a wild animal that can’t be control.

Sure, it comes back to the whole kidnapping by villains. But like, it’s a teenager! And he’s being showcased in a major event that he’s not stable.

So of course nobody should have been surprised that he got kidnapped. Especially when making it clear as day that not even trained heroes know what to do with him.

Which makes his character even more amazing and inspiring. Because, here’s a child who’s put in the spotlight both good and bad. A child who has to constantly be pressured to be “perfect”. But same time people sees him as a monster. The society itself doesn’t see him as a person but as a weapon.

And the whole thing about Best Jeanist being a hero that “conforms” “trouble youths” always hit a nerve with me. Constantly trying to push ideals onto a child to fit into society.

Deku has the obvious being rejected by society for being quirkless. There’s the whole “victim” who eventually stands up for himself.

But there’s nothing like having your every move judge at every waking moment. To have grownups question your every thought. Where how easily you can be seen as a villain if you break an unspoken rule.

It really does hurt to see him go through all that. But I enjoy the few moments where he explores who he truly is as a person. He’s caring, encouraging, hard working to get what he wants. He’s also very friendly.

Then we also get to witness that he doesn’t know many society acceptable behaviors for kids his age. Like activities and gestures that boys his age tend to do. He’s very isolated.

For example: many people when meeting me and knowing my story say that I’m “a shelter child” all because I don’t understand or know common things that people outside my situation knows. I didn’t know there was a thing called Comic Con until college. A lot of my peers were shocked that I didn’t even know that or common events within my own city. I grew up in NYC but know absolutely nothing about it. A lot of people are shocked at the fact I don’t have a common accent to tell what part of NY I’m from. I never knew about the Nintendo or Dinsey store. I basically only ever knew about the outside world was through the internet or documentaries.

So I understand and see the same signs in Katsuki. Of course he doesn’t agree with not using his quirk in public, because everyone always telling him how amazing his quirk is. So he shows it off to hopefully get praised for doing good. The few times he seems to have a social life is with people that lives within walking distance from school to home. He does not travel. He does not know anything outside of his bubble.

Katsuki is basically a “shelter child”. I hate that term. So while going through UA his bubble grows. Izuku isn’t just a childhood friend he has mixed emotions about growing up. Izuku is also like a comfort blanket for Katsuki. Izuku is someone he knows, so it’s easier to go to him when something is wrong.

And as Katsuki has a person, he’s also learning knew things. His bubble is no longer small. It gets to where he doesn’t seek comfort from Izuku, that’s where I believe is when he starts to try to understand his emotions. Like why go to someone who no longer serve their original purpose? I think Katsuki then gets hits with a realization that his life feels empty.

He finally has “friends” and is getting comfortable with himself. He starts trying to make amends for past actions. There’s a borderline between obsession due to that’s the only thing you know and relearning an emotion that was always there.

I’ll use myself as an example for that part. I didn’t I liked girls the way I know now to be. I fought with myself the whole time. Thinking how “we’re just friends” to justify my actions. Always agreeing with my female “friend”, giving her gifts, even giving flowers and calling her pretty. She thought I was weird. Then later in life when I finally understood myself more and my emotions, I learned this “friend” feeling was actually a crush.

Hence why I love the idea of Katsuki coming to terms with himself and eventually realizing he always had a crush on Izuku. And then having those emotions grow but trying harder than ever to bury them. It’s so poetic. Now with this new volume I’m super excited to see if he will finally confess. After all, he is Katsuki Bakugo and he always has to be first.

… SHIT! Lol I rambled lol 😂 I’m not editing or taking this down. Either way, oops 😅

#writer rambles #writer thoughts #bakugo katsuki #fanfic notes #thoughts

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santajp · 11 months

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Holy hell, I get this AI Generated Images thing is the current trend, but I want it to shrivel up and die so much. It is annoying and sad to have to explain to people what it means to live in a basic capacity, that they are so unsympathetic and desensitized to see the reality of the situation they are making happen right in front of our eyes. Despite those who claim that AI 'Art' truly exists being so devout, human sweat and tears mattering little in comparison, their arguments fall flat at the most basic understanding of the technology they are using.

Yes, we are seeing a massive rise of AI power. Though no matter what you want to think, humans made it happen. A computer on its own cannot take your order at a restaurant, know what an art style truly is from years of experience, manage files in the way you ask it to, text through words we know, or speak in a trillion voices, without humans being the foundation for it to do so. It must know a base line, and it must get good feedback and data to improve. A computer cannot make anything that is art because of that lack of meaning, and in a legal sense, the fact that it is most likely taking many copyrighted materials, not for the intention of artistic reasons but because it would be nothing on its own. Unlike a human, which even at the simplest state of an infant, will make something simply to understand the world it inhabits and express such understanding, a computer can only mimic what such life is. It can only see examples of living and try to act as we do, even though it is still, in the end, nothing but what we make it to be. This is why it must steal voices, drawings, animations, writings, and any other form of art to make something that only copies patterns, often time without even a tiny bit of credit being given to those who it took from and leeches off of.

Those who claim we must embrace a new wave of art made by these machines and say this is the future that is somehow better for us are not only an embrassment to the present but also to the rest of human history. They saw an untold amount of time, where we once drew in caves to then be making our mark on the stars with symbols and devices that mean little to the universe at large but so much to us, and drew to the conclusion that somehow the humanity which got us so far suddenly became obsolete. They'd rather damn the rest of history as somehow showing that the goal was to elimnate art rather than let it flourish, than see that they are accepting a life of short-term gratification that only separates people further from one another, and that art was never made simply because it had to be some arbitrary goal of quality.

Art was made to transfer ideas, to show the most mundane parts of living to the grandest ideas we could only imagine. It was made to show what living was, what being human was across the world, and we've seen that what is made lasts. It all isn't perfect, but we see that those before us made an impact by the things they created, and whether they showed the worst or best part of ourselves, they showed one part of it that should be remembered. We must remember to not make the same mistakes, to remember what ideas we had, to use the past to see that no human is flawless and exempt from the self-reflection of morals and the creation of new thought life deserves we give it.

Art is a part of being human, one that is in us by design. We see it in the world in too many ways to speak of and in too many forms to even know of each one. Though no matter what form of art that human feeling of connection comes from, if you care for it, show that by standing up for such meaning in what we want to see. Stand up for those who create, who make things for us to love and be inspired by, who sometimes give us the will to keep moving at times where it may have been hard to do so, and who show somesort of humanity for us to see ourselves through, because anything made by human hands will beat out the mass-prodution of those who wish to turn tail to effort and deny the imperfection of art that is humanity, no matter the profit or delusion they desire for us to have.

#rant post #i hate ai #so so much #if youre gonna do it at least be ethical #frfr

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hotarutranslations · 9 months

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Morning Musume ‘23 Looking Ahead Towards The Future of the Group. Dreams from now on? “Long interview”

Bringing you a total of 6 articles, the VOCE x Morning Musume special collab is finally to the last article! Since the birth of the group 25 years ago, while ever evolving, we asked them about their ‘future’ as Morning Musume powers up. From now on, things they want to do, songs they want to challenge! Don’t miss this special interview looking forward to the evolution of Morning Musume.

--How do you want to breathe new air into Morning Musume from now on?

Ikuta Erina: I want to make an atmosphere that isn’t like Morning Musume, in a good way. I want us to have more of a greedy atmosphere. The senior members have more opportunities to speak than the junior members so, I want to appeal more to the juniors that are like, “It's frustrating when only the seniors talk! I want to talk too,”. It's also important to use every opportunity during MC’s to talk, when you speak; there is a difference between whether it's a few words or many words, and I want them to be feeling frustrated by even the amount of words they get.

Ishida Ayumi: Yokoyama Reina-chan has said “I want to have a fest hosted by Morning Musume”. Those words struck me to the point where it's become my dream now. I would be super happy if that became a reality.

Oda Sakura: I hope that we can become a Morning Musume that truly values “being oneself” again; I want to convey that each member is “wonderful the way they are”! Even though we live in an era where diversity is respected, you can find various information on the internet where what is “cute” is a fixed thing, and I think there are many girls who end up comparing themselves to that. But, so as not to compare ourselves to anyone else, everyone is cute, and I think we each have our “charms” so, accepting ourselves wholeheartedly, I want to be able to determine exactly what is best in the situation, the thing that is “your cute”. I want us to absorb what we learn from other people at the top, and then interpret and express it our own way.

Nonaka Miki: On stage at festivals, I want to further polish Morning Musume’s charms. We’ve had the opportunity to perform at festivals since 2018; the number of music festivals that we’ve participated in has increased year by year. I think outdoor festivals in particular are perfect for showing off Morning Musume’s passion, so I want to challenge them more and more! Personally, I’m given the time to show off my English skills every time, so I want to be able to express my passion in English.

Makino Maria: “Beautiful heart”! It's not limited to Morning Musume, I think that a beautiful heart is absolutely important to whatever you’re doing. I think a person's heart will show to others, so in order to make a good Morning Musume, just getting along with each other definitely isn’t good enough. I'd like to cherish the beautiful hearts of all the members who are working together as one as we aim for the top!

Haga Akane: I’d like to support the 15th, 16th, and 17th generation to breathe a lot of new air into things. I’m looking forward to seeing the changes as each new member joins but, that's because the seniors can bring out the individuality of the juniors. Therefore, while understanding everyone, I want to respect their opinions and support them.

Yokoyama Reina: The current 12 members are the best in both performing and character with our own personalities. We’re really interesting people! (laughs) Therefore, I feel like it's alright to be natural without forcing it. New members are joining, and I’m really looking forward to adding to the personalities!

Kitagawa Rio: Now, but even more in the future, I think SNS is becoming the center for creating trendy things, so I want to do our best towards activities on Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok; I want to make more opportunities for people to get to know Morning Musume!

Okamura Homare: Since the new members are joining, I want to bring in a fresh air of energy and strength together with the new members.

Yamazaki Mei: This year, since it's my last year of high school, I want to bring out the cuteness and freshness of a highschool girl. I’ve been told that I’m someone who is “unlike anyone else in Morning Musume before”; I’m like a member who has a my pace personality. I want to be in charge of healing in Morning Musume by making the most out of my character.

Sakurai Rio: I want to create a new idol that will overturn the concept of an “idol”. I want us to become a group that specializes in performance.

–Are there songs you want to challenge from now on?

Ikuta Erina: A cute song that we haven’t done recently! Morning Musume has made a selling point of dances that can’t be imitated but, I think dances that anyone can do is trending right now like, if there is a cute song that can be done with only the upper half of your body, it’ll go viral on TikTok and the like. I want to think about the costumes for a song with a “the idol” atmosphere!

Ishida Ayumi: I want to make a song that the current members can sing together at the end of a live! We haven’t had songs like “this is a song you’d think of for the ending” recently so, asking Tsunku-san, I’d be happy if we made something like that.

Oda Sakura: A cool and gutsy rock-type song. The current members have done a lot of rock and EDM type music where we implement a lot of detailed movement and I think we have a grasp on that expression of music. Especially now that we are all passionate members, I want to send out that passion with the members with a song that's a little more intense where we can move freely and shake our arms.

Nonaka Miki: It's felt like since the 15th and 16th generation have joined we’ve had many songs that have added coolness and brightness. With the 17th generation joining, I can’t put into words what kind of atmosphere they’ll create yet but, I want to perform songs that seem to fit the atmosphere of the new members joining.

Makino Maria: From now on, Tsunku-san’s songs. No matter the song, whether it's cute or cool, from now on I always want to sing songs made by Tsunku-san!

Haga Akane: I want to sing a song with heavy bass where the key doesn’t rise as a whole the entire time. I like cool songs that are in a low key, and since we’ve often been singing songs that are in a high key recently, I want to do a song that resonates in a low key for the first time in a while.

Yokoyama Reina: I’ve been told often that lately the Morning Musume songs are “Morning Musume-like”, they have a unique and strange atmosphere and rhythmic expression, and I’ve wondered if they are songs “only Morning Musume can do”. Since I love this atmosphere, I want to continue singing songs unique to Morning Musume. Within that, I think it would be nice if there was suddenly a gap where we had a refreshing cute song.

Kitagawa Rio: Morning Musume has a lot of love songs about not being loved by a guy, being cheated on, or unrequited love so, on the other side of that, I want to sing songs about a girl being chased, a love triangle or other interpersonal relationships! I’m curious as to what expressions each of the members would make.

Okamura Homare: Since we’ve had a lot of cool songs for a few years, I’d like to do things like we did before like sort of funny songs or cute songs! Yamazaki Mei: Lately we’ve had a lot of cool songs so, I’d like to do a song that everyone can get into and get excited by like a super cute song or an energetic song.

Sakurai Rio: Since I like instrumentals, I want to do a song that specializes in EDM with lots of music notes!

–What kind of group do you want to be in the future?

Ikuta Erina: I want to be the Morning Musume everyone loves and admires! We will do our best so that we can continue to be a group that is loved by everyone.

Ishida Ayumi: A group where people say, “I hear these idols' lives are amazing”. Morning Musume is a group that has always been holding lives, in the 12 years since I’ve joined we have been able to perform with the feeling of “we're getting more and more amazing,”. Above all, I love lives. Therefore, I strongly think I want to become a group where everyone will be able to say in a word, “Their lives are amazing,” when talking about Morning Musume.

Oda Sakura: Watching Morning Musume, you’ll get energy, you’ll have fun, therefore you want to support us; I want to be a group that makes people feel that way! The meaning of an idol, I think, is in part that it is entertainment but, in the first place “entertainment” isn’t something you can live without. With that, you need it when you can’t manage on your own, wanting encouragement, wanting to be cheered up, wanting to forget your stress; I think we’re the ones who can get close to those feelings.

I want Morning Musume to be a group that expresses its individuality but, with the premise sending out energy and happiness to those that watch, giving the feeling of having the hope to live, if we can’t achieve that, then there is no meaning in just showing our individuality. It's simple but I think it's the most difficult thing so, by properly practicing, I want to be a group that can exist as the best reward for those who watch us.

Nonaka Miki: I want to be a group that prepares to handle any kind of genre of song. Morning Musume has songs in various genres. From now on I’m looking forward to seeing what kind of new songs we’ll perform, not like “the new feel of this song blurs our individuality” but, “this sort of song suits them, how nice,” is what I want for Morning Musume.

For example, when we went to a festival for the first time a few years ago, we were called “stamina monsters”. I think we could apply this as we have trained and prepared to make our regular lives exciting and passionate. Each of us makes concerted efforts even in areas that can’t be seen, so that we can challenge new songs with various new aspects; I want us to always be the best conditioned group we can be.

Makino Maria: We’re able to greet the 25th anniversary thanks to our seniors who have been part of Morning Musume since the beginning. Cherishing the Morning Musume that the seniors built up, without breaking it, going beyond 100 years, I want the group to continue eternally. In order to do that I want to create new legends, I want to be a group that everyone will remember.

Haga Akane: Morning Musume songs (songs made by Tsunku-san) are songs that feel futuristic and nostalgic, since the variation is wide, I want to be a group that is fully compatible with however wide the variation. I want to increase each of the members' experience and knowledge so that you’ll be surprised by the gap in performance every time the song changes during a live.

Yokoyama Reina: Without blurring Morning Musume’s core, I think we’ll naturally evolve so, there isn’t anything I want to change in particular! The current Morning Musume members are just really interesting people so, my biggest wish is to continue to be a group that will continue to be loved by doing cool performances as we are. It's not just Japanese fans who send letters of support and messages, we also receive them from overseas fans, it makes me really happy. From now on I want to aim to be a group that is loved by more people worldwide.

Kitagawa Rio: I want to maintain the status quo in a good way! Morning Musume’s foundation was established thanks to our seniors. We’ve continued for 25 years and of course we aim high but, I think it's necessary to use our strength in order to not to lower the quality of the performances and the position that the seniors built for us. We’re working hard not to lower the highlights of our group.

Okamura Homare: I want to be a group where our core never changes no matter how many years pass. I think we are where we are today thanks to the involvement from many seniors, so the members will change, the new songs will gradually accumulate as well, but with the beliefs our seniors cherished, I want to continue without changing the core part of us.

Yamazaki Mei: Morning Musume has repeated graduations and enrollments, since our group is always continuing to evolve, I want to aim for our group no matter the era, saying with a puff in one's chest “This is Morning Musume!”. Sending out lots of power to people, I want to continue being a beloved group.

Sakurai Rio: I want to show off the power of Morning Musume to many people. When I performed at my first fest, I ended up being moved like “such a wonderful thing exists in this world” (laughs). Those that don’t know about Morning Musume have the chance to know about us like “Morning Musume is this kind of cool group,”, For that, it's a game of how much we can show off our appeal in our limited performance time! Morning Musume has also been called “stamina monsters”; I want us to be a group that attracts the attention of many people from our high level performances. https://i-voce.jp/feed/2627907/

#Morning Musume '23 #Morning Musume #Morning Musume 25th Anniversary #Hello! Project #Translation #Article

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