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wypapichulo · 3 years

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𝟕 𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬.

pairing ; lee donghyuck x reader genre ; fluff, very very slight angst / high school au word count ; 5010 words warnings ; some explicit language? the use of the word 'shit' a few times? playlist ; dive into you – nct dream | walk you home – nct dream | best friend – rex orange county | anti-romantic – txt | can't take my eyes off you – frankie valli | backyard boy – claire rosinkranz author's note ; i hope the ending doesn't sound too rushed,, aah i just lost the vibe and wanted to get it done ;,, i hope it's alright🚶 dt ; @matchaeee <3

Making someone you don't know fall for you would have been easier. Making your best friend fall in love with you? A little bit more of a hassle But not unless they've been in love with you from the start.

“I can make her fall in love with me in 7 days”

Haechan had said this whilst he was sitting on the sidewalk in front of the small convenience store beside an exasperated looking Jeno. “Hyuck, I’m pretty sure you can’t.”, “No I’m confident!” He continued, sipping his carbonated drink and cutting Jeno off as he spoke, “Look– I know her inside and out, I’m sure I know just the right tricks to make her fall for me!”

Jeno sighed slightly, knowing it was no use to force Haechan to listen to him. “You shouldn’t play with feelings like this…” He started, taking a sip of his own soda, “Can’t you just tell her you like her like a normal person–“, “you’re seriously no fun.” Jeno deadpanned at the statement, hand ready to reach for the brunets to pull his fingers back, “I just wanna see if she really likes me back for real!” he said, hands fidgeting with the rim of the soda can, “I don’t know, what if she doesn’t like me and rejects me when I ask her!”

“So the only logical way to fix that is by ‘making her fall in love with you in seven days’?!” Jeno exclaimed, nearly in tears at his own friend’s stupidity. Haechan grinned, “well if she doesn’t like me yet, she’ll definitely like me by the end of this.”

“I’m going to forget about him in the next 7 days.”

Renjun looked up in surprise at the girl’s statement, never having thought of the day she’d finally say it.

“You won’t.” He stated simply, continuing to sketch the tree outside the window of her room. She whined slightly, turning her attention to the boy in her room, “and what makes you say that?”

“You said that two years ago.”, “I was younger then!”, “Sure you were.”

She groaned, falling back on her bed with a thud, “I need to try… this one-sided shit is getting to me…”

Turning to look at the heap of sadness on the bed, Renjun sighed quietly. “I definitely won’t question you if you tell me you’re still in love with him by the end of it.”

“I’m only trying right?”

DAY 1

“How you doin’ gorgeous~”

To say she was shocked was an understatement. What?

“What do you want Hyuck.” She asked with a deadpan, staring down at the blank page of her notebook. Her plan was to study but it seemed as if the man duped as her best friend had other ideas. “I don’t want anything! Can’t I say nice things about you?” He said, taking the seat across from her.

The library was quiet, save for the few students chattering mutedly by the computers. The whole day Haechan had been fine– normal, so to speak… He sat next to her as usual during lunch–as they barely shared any classes this school year–and joked around for a bit, he stole the milk that she had painstakingly waited behind a line of first years to buy, giving her a presumably empty promise that he’d buy her another one… but then he came in the library and said that?

“You’ve never called me that before,” she scoffed, “and if you have, I’d remember.”

Of course she would. Somehow every compliment he had given her always stuck in her mind, even the few ingenuine ones that came out as jokes. The time he called her quick witted when she replied to one of his jokes, the time he said she was pretty good at math’s when she had explained to him how to find an axis… And of course there was the time he had exclaimed how she was prettier than the girl she had been talking shit about… not one of her best feats but... it was something.

So to have him call her gorgeous, even if it was just as a passing nickname… it was something that made her cheeks burn when she remembered his exact wording of the sentence.

“Well that doesn’t matter does it?” he said, leaning over the table to read through the same passage as she had been going through for the last hour, trying to fit anything and everything in her head. “Are you having trouble with anything?”

“Nothing you can help me with.” She scoffed, turning a page. “Aw, come on, don’t say that!” he laughed aloud, earning him an abundance of shushes from the few students scattered around the area. “I’m sure I, with my great expertise, can help you in some way with–“ he looked down at the chapter’s name, “intercontinental… exchange… what the hell is this–“

She laughed lightly at his confusion, “It’s economics,” she smiled, making his heart race with anticipation for some unknown reason, “you won’t get it.”

“Well maybe if you taught me, I’d understand.” He chuckled softly, sitting properly once more and sighing as he stared at the soft curve of her lips. She blushed lightly, realizing the direction of his eyes and looking back down to her book.

Barely the first day and she was already smitten once more with him… she wondered if she’d ever manage to escape from the trap that was Lee Donghyuck.

DAY 2

Closing her locker up, she nearly went into cardiac arrest as she saw none other than Haechan leaning on the locker right beside hers.

“Donghyuck! You almost gave me a heart attack!” she exclaimed, heart pounding at a thousand beats per second… or not– maybe she was just exaggerating…

He smirked, an image that had always and forever will be engraved into the crevices of her mind. “I hope that’s a good thing?”

She merely rolled her eyes at him, shoving her textbook into her backpack. “no.” she stated with a deadpan, turning to walk away. “Wait uppp!” he whined, following along behind the exasperated girl. If Jeno was tired of him, then she was something else entirely. How she managed to keep up with the outgoing boy was a mystery even to herself.

“Are you busy this weekend?” he asked as he caught up with her and took long steps to follow along with her short quick paces, “I was thinking maybe we could go to that new café that just opened– you know, the library one?”

She kept on walking, but her pace slowed significantly. A small tell to her interest in the subject. He smiled.

“You don’t even like reading much.” She said with a chuckle, “why’d you wanna go there?” She asked softly glancing up at him. “Well… you like reading… so–“ he shrugged slightly “–I thought you’d enjoy it…”

See this was the thing about him. Whenever she had made a commitment to stop thinking about him–leave her feelings for him in the dust–he’d always come back strong, making her feel as if he never wanted her to stop liking him. But what could she do? It seemed as if he never had the slightest interest in being anything other than friends.

She smiled softly, sighing as she opened her mouth to give out a small, “alright.” As her answer to his invitation.

“Great! It’s a date!”

The four words stopped her in her tracks between the horde of students walking to and from to get to their classes.

He only grinned, turning to face her as he walked backwards. “I’ll see you after class!”

She was frozen in place it seemed. Blinking as she watched the retreating back of the boy who had… just asked her out?

Again, confusion had begun to settle in. Was this ‘date’ meant to be a romantic date? Or just– one where they hung out as friends and had coffee?

In her confusion, she had forgotten to ask him about the exact day of which their little ‘date’ was supposed to be on… but she was sure he’d text her everything she needed to know about it, right down to the dress code.

Retracing her thoughts, maybe she was wrong… this might have been the first time he’d ever shown any interest in being anything more than friends… And to be quite honest, it may or may not have scared her…

What would she do if it turned out he really had feelings for her…? DAY 3

“I thought you said you were going to stop liking him.”

She had found Renjun in the art room as per usual, painting away at whatever his heart had decided to explore. The golden particles drifted in from the late afternoon sun as she had just finished up her own after school activity. “I want to… But he’s making it so hard!” she exclaimed, sitting on a table to the side at the back of the room.

Renjun was somehow her only sane friend, and even so, he preferred to stay out of her messy love life with the undeniably annoying Haechan. Not to mention that he couldn’t even talk to Haechan without bursting a nerve. “I don’t understand how you don’t see how annoying the boy is.” He said nonchalantly as he continued to mix and match an array of greens to the trees he had started on. “Just thinking of that should be enough to stir you away from him.”

Sighing in aggravation to her situation, she sticked out her tongue at the back of his head. “I saw that.” He stated, barely even looking up from his canvas. “’course you did…” she grumbled lowly, pouting and looking out of the window.

“That’s just the thing…” she started, her tone soft and her eyes unfocused, “he’s not… annoying…”

Renjun scoffed aloud, nearly keeling over in laughter. “Are you sure about that?” He said in between his dying giggles, turning to finally look at the girl who was now looking at him with an unamused look. “Shut up– you know what I mean!” she cried out in annoyance. He made a face, turning back to his painting and continuing to work on the piece. “Really, when you get to know him– he’s more than that!” she tilted her head back to rest on the cool wall of the classroom.

“Today he actually got me the milk I wanted…” she muttered softly, “It’s not much of course… but…”

“You said the other day that you had to wait a long time to get the milk cause of those underclassmen, so– y’know– I got it for you.”

“But it’s enough for you to stay deeply in love with him isn’t it.” Renjun sighed, knowing that she would start yelling as soon as the thought sunk in her head.

To his surprise, she didn’t. She simply sat in thought in the back of the class, watching as Renjun shrugged and continued with his painting. She mulled it over, what he said, and came to the personal conclusion that he in fact was right. It was no use in fighting the feeling. She really did care for him… a little afraid to say love– but she cared for him immensely nonetheless.

She got off the table and walked towards where Renjun sat with his canvas and patted his shoulder lightly.

“Thanks Renjunnie.”

“I told you not to call me that… makes me sound like a child...” He murmured, rolling his eyes before continuing, “what are you even thanking me for anyways? I didn’t do anything. The feelings were there the whole time.”

Her lips turned up slightly, and she hummed softly before walking towards the door.

“You did more than you think.” She said, turning to look at him once more as she opened the door. He merely looked at her in puzzlement, not understanding just how he had helped her in her quest of love. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow!”

“Yeah… see you…” he muttered quietly, his eyebrows still furrowed in confusion, before shaking his head as the door fell shut.

“Why are all my friends so weird…”

DAY 4

The living room of her house was spacious.

Very much so that she wondered why it felt as if she couldn’t even get a distance away from the clingy boy.

Haechan had come over to help her with some of her class work she was struggling with, and truly, she couldn’t thank him enough for the help… but why did he have to sit so close to her?

He had been reading a passage out to her from the book, shoulders brushing ever so slightly against one another, causing her cheeks to flare with heat. Every single move he made seemed to make her tense up all the more.

She was never like this! Each time they had studied together, even as much as she liked him, it never caused her to blush or fidget as much as she was doing now.

Maybe it was the effect of realizing that he might like her after all… The last three days were such an improvement in that area of their relationship that it made her wonder if he actually had liked her all along and just decided to showcase it all now.

“And that’s why the tectonic pressure in this area is much larger than here.” He explained– arm stretching slightly over her to point at an image on the book. For some unknown reason, she had held her breath ever so slightly as to maybe become stone in the next few seconds. He turned to look at her– their faces not too far from one another, and it was like time had stopped right in that moment, just to make her realize how much trouble she was in by falling for this forsaken boy. She could feel her face redden to the deep color of the roses on the front porch of her house, and suddenly, all she wanted to do was melt into a puddle right there and then.

Oddly enough, he seemed to be reactionless. It was as if the proximity of their faces had absolutely no effect on his own heart, bringing up the question in her mind once more whether he actually held any feelings for her other than the simple platonic ones.

“You weren’t paying attention were you?”

Her eyebrows raised to her hairline, quite literally, at the accusing statement he had thrown upon her. “I– Hey! I was listening!”

Suddenly every single feeling of embarrassment left her body as she pushed him playfully, as a means to get away from him as well. He yelped aloud, his back hitting the couch. “You weren’t!” he called out, a smile beginning to grow on the edges of his lips, “I can tell when you’re listening and when you’re not! And here, you were clearly not!”

She laughed loudly, throwing her head back as she did so. It had been ages since she had laughed so freely, and Haechan soaked up every single moment of it. His smile softened as he watched she tips of her eyes crinkle up and turn into crescents– the sound of her laughter as melodious as his own favorite song. In the moment, he wished so dearly he could just reach over and kiss her face all over, his heard filling up with affection he wished to shower her with.

Her laughter died down and she simply turned to look at him with a look in her eyes that he couldn’t quite place. “I really haven’t laughed that much in a while…” she said softly, watching as he nodded in listening. “I can tell.”

She giggled lightly once more. “Should we go back to studying?” she asked, a teasing smile gracing her features, to which he merely scoffed and laughed at.

“Only if you’ll listen properly this time.”

Another 3 days to go. If he was able to successfully make her fall for him, he’d be able to do all he wanted and more. DAY 5

So maybe accepting a walk home from the person you’re trying to forget about isn’t the best strategy to go with… but– in defense, Haechan had been more the one to tag along home, rather than ask her if she wanted anyone to walk her.

She had gotten used to it… but with the antics of the past week and the upcoming date on the Sunday (Yes he had given her all the information the night before. Yes he sent her every available picture there was of the place. Yes he was very excited and honestly, so was she.), who wouldn’t?

As Saturday was a day where she and the rest of the ’00 liners’–as they all preferred to call themselves (though their whole school year was the ’00 line’ so honestly that nickname was rather stupid)–usually had a game night at either Jeno or Jaemin’s house, both she and Haechan had settled on going to the cute little library-esque café on the Sunday.

The whole way home, Haechan couldn’t help but stare softly as she recounted the events of the day. Again, being in different classes had its perks, as there was always something new to tell each other about.

Every step he took felt heavier. He knew they both were getting closer to her house– every time he saw a bench on the side of the street his instinct would tell him to sit down with her and just talk for longer, wanting to keep all her minutes for himself selfishly.

“So that’s why she was kicked out of the class today– I honestly can’t believe she had the nerve to pull that off!” laughing slightly, she turned to face Haechan, “I’m sure you’d do some stupid shit like that too.”

Haechan snapped out of his short daze if not to cry out words of denial, causing her to laugh even louder at his insistence that he would not blend and eat drink his homework just to get extra time on a project.

“After all, I’m not stupid– I don’t need extra project time since I’m just that smart!” He huffed, glancing to the girl beside him to see if he had gauged a reaction out of her. To his delight, she laughed once more, letting him relish in her melodic laughter. “you’re really full of yourself you know?”

This erupted another fit of laughter and denial to spurt from the two, pitter patting home for the day. “I’m not full of myself! I’m just confident!”, “same difference, Hyuck.” She said between breaths as her laughter finally died down.

He merely huffed and pouted– turning to the side and glancing at her a few times to gain her remorse for her mean words ; it clearly didn’t work as all she did was giggle softly and shook her head.

The brush of the back of their hands made his heart pound faster. He glanced down to look and there it was, the soft hand he wanted to hold in his so much. He looked back up in a panic– noticing that they were getting closer to her house.

Unknown to him, her heart was just as heavy at the thought of having to part with him for the day. Though she knew tomorrow would be another day that would definitely be spent with him, it made her sorrowful to think of the fact that they’d have to be apart for the night. Cheesy as it may seem.

As they stood in front of the pathway up to her front door, he debated internally on whether or not he should do what he wanted to do or not, his head spinning at the thought of her maybe thinking he was an idiot for what he was about to do. She smiled up at him, a silent goodbye being exchanged between them, before turning around to walk up the pavement to her house.

“(Y/N)!”

Her feet stopped, and in turn, so did her heart. In a good way, of course, but it stopped nonetheless. She stayed silent for a moment before turning to face the brunet once more. “Yeah?” she asked quietly, a soft smile present on her features.

His mouth dried up. He had nothing to say– stupid! Why did he stop her like that then?

“I– Uh…” he faltered in his words; eyes still stuck on her face. Lips, to be specific.

She tilted her head slightly in question, wondering what was going through that enigma of a mind everyone called Haechan. “Hyuck?”

He smiled and shook his head, opting to grin at her like the idiot in love he was. “Until we meet again tomorrow~” he said in a mock posh accent which made her giggle lightly behind her hand. She merely shook her head and turned once more, walking up to her front door and opening it slowly, turning to give him one last smile before she closed the door.

There he stood like a lovestruck fool in the middle of her driveway as he watched her back turn as she finally walked into the house.

“I wish I had the courage to give you that hug…” DAY 6

Jeno’s house was the choice of the week, Haechan and Jaemin having pestered him into agreement over where they’d all be bundling into for the afternoon.

“I really don’t see why it should have to be my house!” Jeno whined as he stepped into the living room with snacks in hand, “It was already my house last week! It should be nana’s this week…” he trailed off, grumbling as he stepped over the legs of a serious Haechan and sat between the sole girl in their group and Jaemin on the floor. Jaemin laughed aloud, “you have the comfiest sofa!” he hollered out, earning him a kick from Renjun, who’s legs he was sitting in between.

“You’re not even sitting on the sofa,” Renjun retaliated for Jeno, cutting him some slack, “you’re leaning on my legs.”

“Well they sure are comfy if that’s what you’re implying.” Jaemin said, pressing at the buttons erratically as he flurried to beat Haechan at what seemed to be a simple game of mario kart. Hey, anything to beat Haechan right?

“DAMN!” Haechan yelled, causing the girl seated beside him to jump slightly in her seat. Jaemin only laughed, leaning his head up to look at an unimpressed Renjun.

“Hyuck give me the controller, I’m gonna beat Jaemin.” Renjun said with some form of courage to beat the one and only Nana. “Sure you are,” he said, standing up and handing the controller over to Renjun. “Anymore soda anyone?” he asked, stepping to the side to head over to the kitchen. “I’ll have a soda!”, “alrighty! One soda coming right up!” Haechan called out, turning right out to the kitchen.

“I’m gonna run out of sodas at the rate you’re drinking them…” Jeno murmured to her softly, a giggle erupting out of her lips, “fine then– I’ll have a cup of tea instead, ‘s that better?” she asked softly, smiling at the black-haired boy beside her. Jeno smiled back, his eyes disappearing behind his perfect crescents, “I’ll go get you some then.” He said, standing up from his seat to get her some tea.

Walking into the kitchen, he tutted lightly as he found Haechan going through his fridge. “And what if my mom was the one who had walked in?” Jeno stated with a deadpan, rolling his eyes at the idiotic grin his friend gave him. “First off– she’s not home. Second off– your mom loves me!” Haechan exclaimed, closing the fridge behind him after finding nothing of his interest. He picked up the sodas on the counter– before Jeno stopped him. “She changed her mind on the sodas, said she’d have tea instead.” He explained, moving to the cabinets to take out some tea to brew for her, to which Haechan simply hummed in understanding before cracking one of the soda cans open and sipping it.

“So…” Jeno started, turning to face him as he leaned on the counter behind him, “how’s the love quest?” He queried, wondering about his best friends own pursuit of love. “Is she ‘in love’ with you yet?”

Haechan shrugged slightly, “I sure hope she is… if not then I’m not sure what I’m gonna do tomorrow…”

“Why… What’s tomorrow?” Jeno questioned again, tilting his head in confusion. In Haechan’s mind… he looked rather like a lost puppy…

“Date.” The only word that came out of Haechan’s mouth as he stared with a smirk on his face to the boy standing opposite him.

Jeno’s eyes widened significantly, “Date? You mean you asked her out successfully?”

Haechan grinned, “Of course I did!”, he boasted smugly, “only a fool wouldn’t be able to make her fall in love! Especially with the shitty dudes she’s liked before.”

Jeno looked up in glee, “then– after that– my days of hell are over! I won’t have to listen to your lamenting again!” He whined when Jeno exclaimed that, shaking his head, “I wasn’t lamenting, you were the one who complained about my topic of conversation–“ he paused, rolling his eyes at the grinning puppy-like boy.

“Alright fine maybe I was,” he agreed begrudgingly, “But hey! I managed to make her fall in love with me AND score a date in 7 days! My lamenting wasn’t for nothing after all!”

Their shared laughter was cut short by the sound of the slamming of the front door and the cries of both Renjun and Jaemin. Haechan looked up worriedly at Jeno, who in turn gestured him to the kitchen exit.

“what’s wrong?” Haechan asked once he reached by the front door beside the other two boys. “You!” Renjun seethed, turning to glare at the brunet, “She was already trying to forget about you and now you play with her feelings like this!”

Furrowing his eyebrows in confusion, Haechan scoffed, “I never played her like shit! I was always honest!”, “Then tell me what this stupid 7 day bet is all about!” Renjun yelled in his face, angry for his best friend who had muffled out in tears the short reason she was leaving so early.

“Bet?” he questioned, truly confused as to the entirety of the situation, “what fucking bet?”

Renjun rolled his eyes, “Don’t play stupid Donghyuck. You were talking to Jeno about some 7 day bet to get her to like you or something–”, “wait, this is all wrong!” Jeno exclaimed, “We never made a bet! Hyuck wanted to confess to her at the end of the week, and that’s why the whole week he had been making proper advances to her…”

The room stilled as the clarity of the situation which was misunderstood settled into their heads.

“I need to talk to (Y/N).” DAY 7

Checking her phone, she grumbled slightly, rereading the message that Haechan had sent to her the evening prior, or rather, spammed her endlessly.

hyuck ♡ : please come tomorrow.

hyuck ♡ : i really really have to talk to you about this :((

hyuck ♡ : please please please

hyuck ♡ : I don’t know what I’ll do if you don’t come :(((

hyuck ♡ : please? At least consider it?

Sighing quietly as she scrolled through the abundance of messages of theirs from previous sleepless nights, she jumped when she heard the call of the voice she had cried herself to sleep over the night before. Oh his treacherous voice, hurting her feelings like that with the words that came out of his wretched mouth yesterday.

“(Y/N)!” he said, jogging up to her with a grin spread on his face, almost as if yesterday had been a dream and she had simply hallucinated the entire event. But she knew better than to believe him that fast.

Giving him a curt nod, she spoke up before anything could leave his mouth– “Tell me, Donghyuck, what happened yesterday?” she started, face hard with the cut still deep in her heart. His smile faltered, realizing just how much his words had hurt her feelings the day before.

“Do you take my feelings as a joke?” she asked again, looking to her feet in fear of her eyes betraying her and leaving tear stains across her cheeks, “because if you do then i–“

“No!” he cut, knowing that if he let this go on for longer it would only hurt her more, “No, I’d never!”

She was quiet, listening to the sound of his ragged breathing, almost as if the quietness would let her hear the sound of his heartbeat.

“Then what… what…”

He sighed softly, “I was… scared.”

Looking up, she was met with the troubled face of the person she once thought to be the largest of mysteries. “I didn’t want to be faced with rejection, I don’t know what I’d do if I ever lost you, as a friend or as…” he cleared his throat slightly, turning to the side, “as something more.”

The tension was thick, the street around them continuing on its route of life whilst they both stood in their own quiet bubble. Her eyes softened at his statement, the pieces of the puzzle which was Haechan starting to become clearer by every word.

“And you thought the most logical way to go, was to ‘make me fall in love with you in seven days’? come on Hyuck we’re not in some stupid romance movie–“, Haechan’s whine cut her voice short, “You sound just like Jeno now!” he cried, making her laugh softly, before stepping forward to take his hand in hers.

He looked down at their intertwined hands and looked right back up at her questioningly. “what…”

“If you liked me, you really should have just said so…” she muttered softly, shaking her head with a slight giggle, “If you did, it definitely would have saved us 7 days.”

He grinned widely, “so this… makes us boyfriend and girlfriend now, right?” he asked, grin turning into a teasing smirk on his face, making the girl before him scoff and laugh.

“We’ll see in 7 days.”

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metalslimer · 3 years

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gremlin

♡♡♡ | kenny omega x celeste

requested by celeste

warnings: short person jokes, semi-fluff, adult language

author note: this is an inside joke turned to a fic for a friend. nothing to take serious.

summary: kenny is being called out by another wrestler on the aew roster. words are exchanged and things spiral, but no one expected kenny to bring out his significant other to help fight his battles.. especially in the way he does tonight.

❝ i think it’s very funny how the big and bad champ of All Elite Wrestling™️ cowers not only behind his old ass manager, his ugly clothed friends, but now also behind his significant other! ❞ ethan page held the microphone tightly in his grip, pacing back and forth beyond the ring as the crowd surrounding all had mixed reactions to this feud going on. one half on the side of kenny omega and the other half on the side of ethan. it had been three weeks since the initial fight between these two men and apparently ethan wasn’t giving up until either kenny was no longer champion or kenny mans up and takes the final blow. and ethan had been MIA for a while, no show and no sign from him, just his partner scorpio sky to do some damage against The Elite, running around and making a mockery of them.

❝ you know, i don’t think you’ve got what it takes to be the champ Kenny. i truly believe you’re just a sore loser. . stuck up, a sell-out, a coward. otherwise you would’ve been on my ass for lord knows how long now. or is it. . . am i just not good enough for The Cleaner, The Legend, The man? for weeks you’ve been in and out this ring, chapping them gums and running them lips. . . saying how you’re great and how much better than half of us you are. you don’t take a challenge unless you issue one out? well here i am, big boy, issuing YOU this challenge because YOU’RE not worthy of me- ❞

music had interrupted ethan when he was giving a pretty long but inducing speech. fans were leaning forward with each and every word falling from his mouth. however, kenny’s theme hit and it was extra loud because he was sick and tired of hearing this man speak every single week. . . saying the same shit over and over and over and over again. but kenny was not the first to walk out onto the ramp. matt and nick jackson strolled out, their signature looks and outfits, then brandon cutler with his infamous mask and cooling spray settled into his hands, next was don callis - the myth, the legend, the manager. and finally out came kenny omega - THE kenny omega. he didn’t look impressed or interested to be here right now.

❝ so you’ve finally decided to be a big boy, put your pants on, and come face me? well good. i’ve got a whole lot of shit to say to- hold on- what the hell are you wearing? ❞ ethan page stood in the middle of the ring, which was surrounded by The Elite’s members, confused. he just pointed his fingers towards kenny with a puzzled expression plastered on his face. the rest of the audience had the exact same look as well.

there kenny stood, in all his glory. his hair tied back in a quick curly manbun, his beard shaven up and trimmed, he wore nice fitting pants with an even nicer fitting shirt, an outfit that wasn’t tacky nor ugly - as some could say. but his outfit was not what ethan was talking about - no - not at all. he was talking about the fact celeste, kenny’s significant other, was quite literally hanging off his chest while being stuck inside one of those baby carriers. celeste was a shorter person compared to kenny but no one could ever have expected him to march down the ramp with them attached to him like one would do with an infant. it looked absolutely ridiculous!

❝ what do you mean? i’m simply wearing some dress pants with a Gucci shirt. not that you would know anything about that- you look cheap. ❞ kenny puffed his chest and ignored the literal protests coming from celeste as their feet kicked in the air and their arms swung up and down. they couldn’t quite get up and out of this child-made carrier or else they would’ve been out and gone a long time ago. now this was just embarrassing. . .

❝ i’m talking about the fact a grown ass person is hanging off of your frontside! what the fuck is wrong with you? this is shameful and weird. . . ❞ ethan might’ve had a run for his money back in Impact Wrestling ™️ but he didn’t think he’s done anything as weird as this. was this some kind of kink? was it a punishment? on live television - it was concerning.

❝ you clearly don’t know what they even did to have been put in here. did you know they’re an ankle biter?! they like to bite and kick ankles and kneecaps- just the other day they went out on a rampage like some feral gremlin because they were hungry! i could’ve came out here without celeste, sure, but they’re just as important to me than anyone else. you’re lucky, ethan page, because i could’ve brought them out here without safety precautions and you might’ve been the next victim. ❞

said-gremlin in question just hung there and grumbled considering they couldn’t get out and kenny wasn’t likely to help them out either. none of the other members, who were close friends, even attempted to help them break out of this baby prison. apparently they too were scared of what celeste might do to them once they’re free and able to work their limbs again. but it wasn’t even the fact kenny came up with this idea. . . it was him literally carrying celeste out from backstage and into the eyes of not only the fans who sat in the audience but now in front of the cameras, of thousands more who watched at home. how humiliating it was to just helplessly stick there and not say or do anything.

❝ for the sake of keeping my most preciousness safe and sound, i will not be stepping into the ring with you tonight. i couldn’t forgive myself if celeste got hurt by the likes you, ethan. however i will say this. . . your measly stupid challenge has been accepted! i will even go ahead and schedule it for this upcoming pay-per-view event. . . make it a huge deal since that’s what you want. but don’t get your head all big- you won’t win this sunday and tonight, you won’t be leaving this ring in one piece either. ❞ the second kenny was finished dishing out his words, the young bucks with brandon cutler were sliding into the ring and attacking ethan page almost instantly. The Elite didn’t play nice, they played to win, so naturally ambushing and beating up their enemy was the wa to go. and look. . . seemed as if ethan didn’t have any friends tonight as no one had come out to aid him in his time of need.

celeste was finally set free of the baby carrier they were strapped in, their legs felt a bit like jelly and numb, pins and needles shooting throughout the whole leg. however it was bearable, ❝ thank you for letting me out, kenny. but now that i’m free. . . this feral gremlin, as you put it, is going to kick your fucking ass! ❞

❝ no, wait- i did that for your own good! who knows what you would’ve done to ethan out there for trash talking me- baby- NO! PLEASE! ❞ people in the hallway kept to their own business as the screams of the AEW Champion was heard, traveling through backstage, settling in. not even The Elite could save him now.

#aew #aew wrestling #kenny omega #the elite #ethan page #matt jackson #nick jackson #brandon cutler #don callis #impact wrestling #fluff #short jokes

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cto10121 · 3 years

Text

The bad Shakespeare takes keep coming, I see. This one had the cleverness to couch itself as a personal narrative (makes it much more interesting, tbh). But as bad Shakespeare takes are my bread and butter, my boon and bane, mamma mia here we go again, with Merchant of Venice.

“But those who thought the play was irredeemably antisemitic were, the consensus went, vulgar and whiny—and, completely coincidentally, they were also Jewish, which somehow magically invalidated their opinions on this subject.”

I’m glad (is that even the right word?) this author found scholars that don’t think this play is anti-Semitic, but my experience with scholarship has been way more mixed than that. Suffice to say, this is literally all the play is known for these days, and views of the play as anti-Semitic are everywhere (Rosenbaum even had a hot take that since the Nazis liked it, it must be anti-Semitic). Didn’t know Harold Bloom thinks this play is anti-Semitic, though. That in itself is a bit of a red flag, as Bloom is a notoriously poor reader of Shakespeare.

“[I]n Merchant, Portia unhappily fulfills her father’s requirements of her suitors, while in Il Pecorone, the lady enjoys drugging her suitors and robbing them blind. By removing this detail, Shakespeare removed the suggestion that malicious schemers come from all walks of life.”

Or, by removing this detail, Shakespeare removed the clear and abhorrent sexism of his original source that turned a woman robbed of her autonomy by her father’s will into a criminal. It’s almost as if you’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

“Dr. Lopez, one of the most respected physicians of the 16th century, had indiscreetly revealed that he once treated the Earl of Essex for venereal disease. The earl took revenge by framing Dr. Lopez for treason and arranging for his torture; while on the rack, Dr. Lopez “confessed”—though “like a Jew,” as the court record states, he denied all charges at trial, while the attorney for the Crown referred to him matter-of-factly as “a perjuring murdering traitor and Jewish doctor.”

This is a very twisted account of the Lopez affair and Essex’s motives in going against him, at least to my understanding. For context, Lopez was accused of receiving loads of money from the King of Spain to poison Queen Elizabeth.

According to Stephen Greenblatt, in Will of the World: “Essex had tried some years before to recruit Lopez as a secret agent. Lopez’s refusal—he chose instead directly to inform the queen—may have been prudent, but it created in the powerful earl a very dangerous enemy. After his arrest, he was initially imprisoned at Essex House and interrogated by the earl himself. But Lopez had powerful allies in the rival faction of the queen’s senior adviser William Cecil, Lord Burghley, and his son, Robert Cecil, who also participated in the interrogation and reported to the queen that the charges against her physician were baseless.” Lopez apparently had been taken bribes from various sources, and confessed (freely? under torture?) “that he had indeed entered into a treasonous-sounding negotiation with the king of Spain, but he insisted that he had done so only in order to cozen the king out of his money.” Weird.

Greenblatt isn’t a historian, though, and Essex was indeed an asshole to Lopez, (and for what is worth, I feel Lopez was innocent; I just get those vibes) but so far I can find no other source that Essex actively framed Lopez. Most likely he did some sleuthing, dug up some questionable, compromising stuff, and tried to blow a hearth flame into a firestorm.

“After all, the historical record gives Queen Elizabeth a cookie for dawdling on signing Dr. Lopez’s death warrant; her doubts about his guilt even led her to mercifully allow his family to keep his property, not unlike the equally merciful Duke of Venice in Shakespeare’s play.”

Again, Lopez had powerful allies (doesn’t get much higher than Burghley), and again, re: Greenblatt: “According to court observers, Elizabeth gave Essex a tongue-lashing, ‘calling him rash and temerarious youth, to enter into a matter against the poor man, which he could not prove, and whose innocence she knew well enough.’” A cupcake, then?

“And it is of course entirely unclear whether this trial and public humiliation of an allegedly greed-driven Jew attempting to murder an upstanding Christian, rapturously reported in the press with myriad antisemitic embellishments, had anything at all to do with Shakespeare’s play about the trial and public humiliation of a greed-driven Jew attempting to murder an upstanding Christian—which Shakespeare composed shortly after Dr. Lopez decomposed. Most likely these things were completely unrelated.”

Nearly all the major Shakespeare biographies and articles I’ve read literally and explicitly talks about the possible influence of Lopez’s execution on Merchant of Venice and names it as an inspiration: Greenblatt, (he even headcanons that Shakespeare watched the execution!) Bate, Ackroyd. That’s how Horn managed to ping my BS radar something awful—because I had read about it, many times, even if it was mentioned in passing. It’s solid, legit Shakespearean academic fanon. The sarcasm is really unwarranted, and childish besides.

“It was damned hard to hear the nuance while parsing lines like “Certainly the Jew is the very devil incarnal,” or “My master’s a very Jew; give him a present, give him a halter,” or explaining what Shylock meant when he planned to “go in hate, to feed upon / The prodigal Christian.”

The first two are the fool’s, Lancelot’s, lines, I think. As for Shylock’s hatred toward Christians, while ugly, it’s entirely understandable given the Christian characters’ treatment of him pre-play and during it (Antonio spitting on Shylock’s gaberdine and then asking him to borrow money from him is called out by Shylock himself for its sheer hypocrisy). It also fits Shylock’s character as an unassimilated Jew, resenting Christian hypocrisy and racism.

“The actor began the brief soliloquy that every English-speaking Jew is apparently meant to take as a compliment: ‘I am a Jew. Hath not a Jew eyes? Hath not a Jew hands, organs, dimensions, senses, affections, passions? . . . If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?’

“Wait, that’s the part where he’s more human?”

[…]“Sure,” I told my son, game-facing him back in the rearview. “He’s reminding us how he’s like everyone else. He’s a normal person with normal feelings.”

My son laughed. “You seriously fell for that?”

[…] “What do you mean?”

“Shylock’s just saying he wants revenge! Like, ‘Oh, yeah? If I’m a regular human, then I get to be eee-vil like a regular human!’ This is the evil monologue thing that every supervillain does! ‘I’ve had a rough life, and if you were me you would do the same thing, so that’s why I’m going to KILL BATMAN, mu-hahaha!’ He’s just manipulating the other guy even more!”

And then the crowd applauded, Harold Bloom cried, and the mayor gave the author’s six-year-old son a gold medal for his Brave Hot Take. Honestly, this was the most unbelievable part of the essay I’ve read. Unless this kid has been reading academic essays on MoV that posit this exact same interpretation (“Shylock was just using humanistic rhetoric to justify his ~bloodthirsty revenge!”), this one’s for a fake Internet stories anthology. Shylock may be a dour, miserable pain in the ass, but he is no Barabas, an actual anti-Semitic caricature—he has a character, and a recognizably human one, and the play bears it out that he is right in his anger.

“I reviewed the other moments scholars cite to prove Shylock’s “humanity.” There were two lines of Shylock treasuring his dead wife’s ring, unlike the play’s Christian men who give their wives’ rings away. But unlike the other men, Shylock never gets his ring back—because his daughter steals it, and becomes a Christian, and inherits what remains of his estate at the play’s triumphant end.”

Er, this is a non sequitur—that last has nothing to do with the first. The point is, Shylock doesn’t give away his ring; the fact that his daughter stole it means nothing to his treasuring it. It may be proof of the play’s marginalization of Shylock (which accurately if sadly reflects real-life systematic marginalization), but not his humanity. Shakespeare just doesn’t do backstories, even for major characters, so it is significant that he gave Shylock a wife/beloved in the first place.

“Finally, scholars point to the many times Shylock explains why he is so revolting: Christians treat him poorly, so he returns the favor. But for this to satisfy, one must accept that Jews are revolting to begin with, and that their repulsiveness simply needs to be explained.”

This makes absolutely no sense at all. If one accepts Jews are inherently revolting, then no explanation need be given for when a Jewish character acts revolting! The racist accepts the revolting Jewish characterization without qualm. The fact that the play insists on his grievance is significant.

“We listened together as Shylock went to court to extract his pound of flesh; as the heroine, chirping about the quality of mercy, forbade him to spill the Christian’s blood as he so desperately desired; as the court confiscated his property, along with his soul through forced conversion; as the play’s most cherished characters used his own words to taunt and demean him, relishing their vanquishing of the bloodthirsty Jew.”

YMMV, but to me there are no cherished characters in this play. That’s the whole point! Everyone is so mired in this dreary capitalist materialism that denigrates genuine human connection into mere transaction. Everything to these characters is money, money, money (and class), or at least tainted by it. Shylock is simply the most overt (and honest) of the lot. Love relationships, religion are impoverished; Portia and Bassanio are scarcely more suited than Portia and her other suitors. Shylock and Antonio are Jews and Christians in-name-only: They are capitalists first and foremost. Portia is a smarter, more likable Karen. Lancelot isn’t funny. Jessica is okay, but her leaving her father is framed as a asshole moment at least in one instance. Portia is probably the most lovable, but she has her asshole moments too. There are no truly awful characters, but you don’t need to demonize and dehumanize your whole cast into two-dimensional racists just to make a point.

Merchant of Venice is not the best of plays. It is one of Shakespeare’s experiments, a proto-problem play before his Jacobean era, using dark comedy and a slight bent of farce to explore and elucidate social issues, racism and discrimination, chiefly. At least it tries, anyway. Taming of the Shrew is the first proto-problem play done completely farcical, which at least makes it compelling in a slapstick-satire way; Merchant is much more sociologically astute, but also more dull and coolly distant even from its own concerns. I don’t blame anyone, much less Jewish people, for not liking the play or thinking it a masterpiece. I myself don’t, though for reasons that have nothing to do with the usual ones. I like what Shakespeare was trying to do and I think he did some things very well. It has ambition and thought. But I feel like for most of it Shakespeare was on writing autopilot while mentally looking around for something a bit meatier to adapt and develop. It’s a jogging-in-one-place play; he has a couple of those.

In sum: Author argues for complicated play’s anti-Semitism, ends up just saying the racist slurs by the flawed/asshole Christian characters made her and her son uncomfortable (feat. A distorted and even misleading account of the Lopez affair). Plus some internalized anti-Semitism to sort through, methinks.

#the merchant of venice #shakespeare #cristina metas #shakespeare meta #kind of #cristina reviews #also kind of #merchant is not even one of my liked plays but these takes are just wearying

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lady-plantagenet · 3 years

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What are your top ten novels about the Wars of the Roses? And why?

I think it’s obvious by the length how enthusiastic I was to answer this ask xx thank you for asking me and giving me also an opportunity to make a masterlist of some sorts of all my reviews xx. But you know? I speak like quite the expert but in reality I’ve read very little histfic about TWOTR because I just newly got back into this hobby (about a year ago) and have little time in general so tbh the last three books on this list I do not personally care for but since I’ve read so little novels of this kind they are here nonetheless hhh (so please people, give me no angry asks asking me why I am endorsing PG, I’m not).

1. The Last of the Barons by Lord Edward Lytton-Bulwer

This is quite possibly the best book I’ve ever read in my life. The gap between these books and the rest is a chasm the size of the world and I wpuld genuinely reccomend this book as an actual piece of literature to anyone, not just TWOTR fanatics. It is written in 1840, in quite old timey lingo and it centres around Richard Neville 16th Earl of Warwick, but in the true tradition of a real classic it is more than just a character drama, it astutely showcases the purpose of Warwick and what he did in the context of his wider world and doesn’t just chalk it up to personal greed. There is also this fascinating subplot about courtship, science and such. Hell, you even get this eccentric ‘natural philosopher’ guy called Adam Warner who tries to make something like a steam engine and gets employed as an alchemist by Jacquetta and Edward IV.

From a historical standpoint it is quite biased as the author himself was a politician (and an actual baron) and tbh I don’t completely agree with his interpretation of history and I can see some of the Victorian inluences slip in, but some of his takes are very refreshing and he clearly consulted the primary sources. I am much interested in his philosophy and life outlook though and while I don’t think his Warwick is the Warwick, I think he (Lytton-Bulwer) understood him like no other novelist could. As for the writing style... here’s an excerpt of a good reads review that I agree with and tells you all you need to know:

“Of course, such a style of writing no longer exists. The language used is essentially foreign to us. But the nobility, the pride of this story work their ways into your bones, your heart. You will yearn for honor once you have left it.“

Basically, go type it into google and see what I mean. You don’t even need to purchase this book it’s all online at the first click on Gutenberg.

Nevertheless, I’ve posted excerpts of it here, here and here =)

2. The King’s Grey Mare by Rosemary Hawley Jarman

This book (unlike the latter) has zero actual historical value. Actually, it sort of does in the way that it hilights certain real events that most people are unaware of when it comes to its protagonist: Elizabeth Woodville, eg the whole Cooke tapestry affair and the whole Desmond affair. Both things which I still stand on the fence about (if you don’t know what I’m talking about send em another ask or pm me). But like, it isn’t political, philosophical or such in any way like the first book, yet you still feel like you are *there* in the 15th century - by the time I finished reading it my heart was wrung dry and I kind of fell into a down for a couple of days because I just wanted to feel the magic again. If anyone would ask me I would give this 5 stars because it perfectly achieved what it set out to do (I can’t expect all books to go above and beyond like #1), it made me feel for the characters who were super complex, was accurate historically and even when it wasn’t it made sense, it got very creative with its themes (which I like to see because I am not interested in reading the exact same story over and over again) and the prose was absolutely magical and brought all the depth to this novel. I’ve read classics with less flowing and poignant prose, yes actual classics!

This book also switches POVs quite a lot (basically it headhops because it’s written in omniscient- but whatever, rules are meant to be broken), so you’ll get to see many of your faves in there, Edward IV, Margaret of Anjou and Grace Plantagenet feature quite heavily. One thing that disappointed me is that it wasn’t really Edward IV/Elizabeth Woodville (at the time I bought it for that), she never really likes him and his love for her kind of wanes towards the end. If you’re not too bothered about that then I say go buy it.

3. The Daisy and the Bear by K L Clark

I put this here because we are already going into shakier territory when it comes to this list. This is kind of the last *really* good, truly five star one. It is a long spoof about TWOTR but god it’s smart! Yet, It does not take itself seriously and has Margaret of Anjou/Warwick the Kingmaker as a crackship and centrepiece and had me in stitches the whole time. I’ve written a long detailed review for it here.

4. Death be Pardoner to Me by Dorothy Davies

This is a novel about George Duke of Clarence. Quite possibly the only novel ever written about him in existence and boy is it a trip - the author claims to have channelled him (she’s a medium). I’ve written a detailed review for it here. I read this last spring and my views have unfortunately changed, the thing is, I’ve come to find out through my research that this was quite possibly a hoax as there are some indisputable inaccuracies (Ankarette Twynyho’s age, the details of Isabel’s death - we *know* she did not die from childbirth, Isabel did not reunite with him after Tewksbury 1471, but right before Christmas 1470). It’s also quite Richardian (the author admitted) and she could have *had* me had she not chose to divulge it in the foreword. Nevertheless, I still like this book because it did get to me at certain points and it’s good quality as a novel, I remember shedding a tear at one point even which is extremely rare for me but I think that says more about my sentiment for the subject matter than the book itself.

5. We Speak no Treason by Rosemary Hawley Jarman (not yet finished, so ranking may vary)

I haven’t finished it yet, so I’ll leave it here for now. This book is a Richardian book about Richard III, but I can’t get enough of this author, I haven’t found anyone to replace her with. The prose is magnificent as usual and I must confess that I’m happy that this book is told through the POVs of three OCs and not Richard, he remains rather elusive and tbf I find the three OCs very interesting and at this point I’m more interested in their stories than anything else. Of course, Richard III is still a fairly prominent part of this novel (even when he doesn’t appear) and it has led to me getting annoyed quite a bit. Given who I am I fumed massively at that one aside that Clarence and Edward have bastards whereas Richard isn’t like that... like are you serious?? At one point the author reassociated the Games and Playes Chesse book to Richard when it was in reality dedicated to Clarence and I got even more annoyed. Leave the poor figure something ma’am? Whatever, as a book about three medieval commoners it’s fantastic and that’s what I pretend it is.

6. Wife to the Kingmaker by Sandra Wilson

Nothing more to add than what I wrote in my (super-long) detailed review on here. This is the case because I read it very recently. This is a novel about Anne Beauchamp 16th Countess of Warwick, it’s ranked higher than Sunne because though it’s less accurate it’s got panache.

7. The Sunne in Splendour by Sharon K Penman

I feel very strongly about this Richard III book and what it represents. I wrote a long detailed review about it on here and a follow-up post on the discussion is here ft my awesome mutual @beardofkamenev ‘s insights also thrown into the mix. Xx

8. The White Queen by Philippa Gregory

This is a step higher than the other two because this book pretty much changed my life. The thing is, I read it translated into my own language by an extremely talented translator and I was also only about 11/12 years old so it was all very impressive to me then. This book about Elizabeth Woodville effectively introduced me to the TWOTR; an interest that has never really left me these past ten years (though at one point (ages 14-19) it was quite wane). It’s not a good book by any standard (I was quite shocked when picking it up at a bookstore, I had found that when read in the original language it lost all its magic), but I owe a lot to it and some people who now endlessly discourse about how bad PG is need to recognise their debt of gratitude and be a bit more respectful, I think. That is of course unless you came into this era via different media, but you got to admit that a massive part of us got to this place through TWQ, though we outgrew it.

10. The Red Queen and The Kingmaker’s Daughter by Philippa Gregory

Exact same commentary as above, just objectively not good books. Flat characterisation, misunderstanding of the era, historical innacuracies which don’t add anything, lack of nuance in prose which often dances too close to *gasp* YA prose *shudders*. But these are lower because I don’t owe them a debt of gratitude as I do TWQ. Funnily enough, they are still better than the series.

#look at rb for tags

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thejudgingtrash · 4 years

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My unpopular opinion: Chiron is a horrible teacher, protector, whatever. He’s as bad dumbledor. He often manipulates children and put them in danger? Also is RR really trying to tell me not one single demigod from before percy’s generation made it to adulthood? Not even demigods of minor gods? If not then why haven’t we heard from them, why weren’t they called to fight in the war so that literal children didn’t have to? I have more but I’m not brave enough to post them lol

Fuck, I gotta check my asks more often. Too much stuff laying around and oh please people! Send your stuff in! Don’t be shy! It’s so interesting to see what’s on your mind! Let’s have that conversation and ask me!! :D I mean a bunch of people agreed and disagreed with my stances (Part 1/Part 2), let’s see how I feel about yours!

Anyway HERE WE GO BOYS! LET’S GO LESBIANS LET’S GO!

LET’S HAVE THAT WHOLE DAMN ESSAY!

Chiron is clearly a self insert from Riordan. I mean come on…

That’s a solid Chiron if I see one. Which is pretty ironic as Chiron’s the shitty teacher who we all know and love. Got something to admit, Riordan? You as a former teacher? HMM?

Hiding incompetence under the disguise of the gentle old wise teacher is definitely something that Dumbledore and Chiron share. Chiron is the old centaur who lived for aeons and helped out the most famous heroes of their times, so shouldn’t modern times be considered to be an easier job for him? He’s barely present, highkey vague and has absolutely no problems with tossing children literally out into the open across the entire fucking US and A to clean the gods’ bathroom messes.

Had the heroes been in their 20s like in the original myths (or even older) it would’ve made more sense to let them find their own ways. It would be rude, but somewhat okay. You could expect adults to find the way and connect the dots. But this is just messing with a bunch of 12 year olds because you can at this point.

Chiron is that supposed sweet teacher that just fucks up. We all had one, you know the one. Seems gentle and nice and but has clearly chosen the wrong job. Don’t know if that’s the trauma of living that long and/or seeing kids dying constantly that’s hitting him in the back of the head.

I have the feeling that people are projecting their teacher fantasies on to him just like step-father fantasies that include Paul. Because we want a guide who is trustworthy, we want an authoritative figure that we can share our concerns with and who guides us to solid solutions without betraying our trust.

But like I said, he’s essentially sending out kids to deathly missions and encouraging deep traumas. Yes, we can partially blame Chiron, but most of the blame goes to the gods who enable and encourage this weird dynamic. Would all of them straight up cut the bullshit and mostly resolve their own issues without using their children as pawns, it would’ve been easier for everyone involved. Additionally, there are many kids in camp to keep busy, look after and care for. I don’t know how many there were pre-TLO but I’d assume the number was in the hundreds? Of course, in larger cabins are camp counsellors that help out and guide next to camp schedules. But since Percy’s the only kid in the Poseidon cabin I guess that thought went south? Percy being the special kid would actually mean that there should be a focus on him unless you’re going for the “I’m neutral” spiel. Chiron knew from day one that Percy was walking Poseidon seed, come on.

Also like I somewhat implied, seeing people die left and right might have impacted Chiron to make him feel indifferent/despressed (could also be a stretch, who knows). Which isn’t an excuse, but might explain some takes. Explaining the same stuff for millennia in its essentials is probably getting tiring.

I think this is the third time that I mentioned it on my blog but showing and telling are the most powerful story telling concepts/fundamentals and you see Rowling and Riordan constantly failing at that which is concerning. Instead of Chiron (or Dumbledore) just simply getting down to the point and telling and explaining stuff briefly, he only eludes, vaguely formulates and it is simply confusing especially for a child in a brand new environment who just lost his mother (if we’re speaking about TLT). This does nothing but add more stress in such a fragile situation especially when a new and bigger threat makes its way.

There’s also the discussion on how much of Greek myth Percy actually gets. He has the basic/ obvious knowledge which many tend to forget. He doesn’t come in with no knowledge. He had Latin classes back at the academy, he studies with Annabeth, he knows some of the monsters. What he simply doesn’t know, is the magic of it all. That is the most confusing part for him.

The actual magic is not explained, which it doesn’t have to be in all of its entirety, but needs to be addressed somehow and gradually.

Percy asking a simple question like how the camp stays sunny and covered 24/7 and how the wardens work and Chiron casually sitting here like you a stoopid one

doesn’t help.

What many people forget: Magic doesn’t erase logic. Even in a magical setting, unless clearly stated, there has to be some kind of logic to connect the dots. It doesn’t need to be a clear cut A to B, but it should be comprehensible for both the readers and the characters in a particular situation. And that’s just not happening for Percy as the character. This also sets up the premise of Percy being ”stupid” which he isn’t. He is surrounded by incompetent teachers and staff that don’t bother telling him how things work and assume that he’ll just manage.

Yeah. Both Dumbledore and Chiron are awfulness in a sweet calm disguise.

Onto part two of the ask. I have had so many talks with people on that exact problem. It simply boils down to one issue:

Rick Riordan‘s inconsistency in world building and setting. The story telling doesn’t make any sense.

So kids are dying like flies before 18 but many are also super famous and in powerful positions? Many are historical figures that made it well over 18? Make that make sense. Also was WW2 supposed to be kicked off by some 12 year olds with that logic? The biggest man made catastrophe of the modern era boiled down to a bunch of fighting kids? No. We all know it. Just simply no. I actually don’t mind the WW2 background but Riordan should’ve given it another thought and be a bit more sensitive…? Like the whole fascist gang being team Hades? Uhh… sure…. nope.

Also the same logic applies to Civil War? You’re telling me a bunch of kids were supposed to have started this stance? Who was for and who was against slavery then? What in the actual fuck? Using children as child soldiers to stand in for these large complex historical issues that stretch over years and show many of humanity’s horrifying sides is just….eh.

No. This whole thing about campers dying as soon as they reach the magic number of 18 are either bedtime stories to scare the kids or toughen them up orrrr my guess, Riordan actually managed yet again to fuck up his own lore.

It’s the same logic with New Rome. You have a whole city full of adults but have a few kids run that bitch? You did your ten years of service as a child soldier and then do one of these?

As if adults magically exit this world. Like is that the reason why Percy’s been 17 for a whole damn decade? Because otherwise he gotta hand riptide in and all of the boys scout medals he has collected so far? Adults would’ve had the experience and expertise to win those fights but it would break the magic and charm of the books that a bunch of kids are saving the world for the younger demographic. Let’s do not forget that the targeted audience of the books are middle schoolers. Makes somewhat sense with PJO but with HOO Riordan really shot himself in the leg. He should’ve matured the OG characters at least.

(Also speaking about the actual myths again. A good chunk of them died in their 20s/30s/40s. Odysseus guided as an old man. The heroes weren’t twelve and dipping by the age of 16. The Trojan war went on for 10 years for example. So whereas the real Perseus lived a longer life and had a somewhat happy ending in comparison to his peers, he wasn’t the only one that made it into adulthood.)

Riordan mixing up his own lore is just a shame. Yes, it’s human and he already gets a lot of flag for other stuff. I also get it as a writer with my fanfic where I really have to scroll up to search tiny details that I’ve embedded and not noted down. Perhaps it’s my inner capitalist speaking, but for I’m way more forgiving towards a free product, a gift like a fanfic, rather than something I’ve paid actual money for when it comes to this. The process of publishing a book is large. You mean to tell me that there was no editor at Disney that bothered to fact check? Riordan got a check from us all and doesn’t even bother looking up his own stuff. A little bit more effort, Ricardo. Please. You have an entire damn wiki you could use to check for free if you’re too lazy to read your own books/don’t use authors softwares. Like what?

It’s stupid. You know it, I know it. And as you can see, I fully agree with you.

#ask #ask me anons #percy jackson #percy jackson and the olympians #pjo #chiron #chb #rr crit #rick riordan #hoo #heroes of olympus #my rants #camp half-blood #dumbledore #pjo hot takes

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border-spam · 4 years

Text

Leech Lord: Quirks

Handling critique:

Troy:

He doesn't know them by name and they aren't showing respect when he turns to apprehend who just dared interrupt him rudely in front of others?

Dead. Immediately. There's no pause to hear them out or explain themself, their head will be crushed in that spined fist before he even finds out what they were about to say was criticism. There is no concern or regret over this later, he won't even care enough to remember their face.

Far more forgiving in private as he’s not needing to play up to his persona, but still - respect has to be shown.

Someone he is aware of by name/rank, or sees as having value?

Stay polite and factual and he'll listen. Hands clasped behind his back and shifting his eyes down their body as they speak, like they’re being measured, or read. He'll listen. The more numbers they can provide, the more clear data they can give that shows his information or his actions are wrong and what they are suggesting is better, the more likely he will take it on board. The God King is surprisingly polite and coldly calm when approached correctly, regardless of if he likes what he is being told.

- A close friend?

Nervous, picking at his teeth with the tips of his nails and finding it hard to meet their eyes. Hunched over himself and back bent even if he still towers over them, like a child who just wants to go hide. Stuttering. Apologetic to the point of becoming self deprecating even if what they were raising was only minor. It's not a big deal Troy, it's not, it was just some feedback. Calm down pal it's not worth getting worked up over, really. No you don't have to redo the whole thing, that's stupid come on y.. no you aren't stupid Troy, don't delete it all.. Oh, Troy.

Tyreen -

She does not hear, she does not see.

From anyone. It doesn't matter who they are. Unless you are her you're wrong, because she cannot be incorrect. She is infallible... you get it, right sweetheart?

She is omnipotent. She is a GOD. It's not that she's not listening to them, they don't mean enough for her even to be able to hear.

Seifa:

A stranger she views as someone below her in position?

Lol who are you. Who the fuck are you to think your opinion has any value, let alone matter to her? She's not even hearing what you're saying, you should be out of her presence by the time she stops eyerolling by the way, she's a busy woman. May not be healthy to waste more of her time.

Above her in authority or experience?

Silence. Not quite making eye contact, she's focusing on breaking down what you're saying and digesting useable information. A quick "Got it, I'll consider what you said" afterwards is genuine. She will consider it. That doesn't mean she will take it onboard, but she knows not to waste valuable data.

Friend?

A mix of both. She'll make it clear there's a very good chance her opinion on this is going to supersede yours, but that yours still has value for her. She might not make change changes right now based on it.. but it could affect how she approaches things in the future.

Pet Peeves:

Tyreen

A pet peeve, one she's irked by but doesn't spend a huge amount of time lost in rage over, is people treating her like she's airheaded. It happens often, especially when she's around Troy. She's not dumb. At all. Just because she's not a giant, brooding, scowling asshole who stands in silence while death-glaring everyone in the room, doesn't mean she's vacant or stupid. Just because she's louder, and more animated, doesn't mean she's ditzy.

In talks, the conversation always gets pointed to him for any discussion regarding anything with business or technical depth, she hates it. He's good at this shit, he's great with numbers and logic, but just because she communicates differently doesn't mean shes terrible. It's irritating.

Seifa:

Bullshit. She cannot abide hearing someone talk complete wank, and wants extremely direct clearcut conversation at all times bar if she's talking shit with friends. That's totally different.

She wouldn't manage to be in the same room as someone like Rhys or Katagawa for more than 5 minutes before she'd be ready to peel her own face off and eat her hands, so takes a lot of comfort from the "Please fucking kill me oh my god" gestures and grimaces Troy makes towards her from out of the speakers sight in meetings where they are dealing with the waves of verbal shite emanating from some corporate tool.

Troy:

Sleeping. It's just a fucking waste of time. It's completely pointless. Shut yourself down for hours so your body can release chemicals it needs? Fuck sake, just take the chemicals and stay awake, wow, well done, now you have 1/4 of your life back!

Dreams suck, waking up feeling like death sucks, spending hours laying awake staring at your ceiling while trying to make your "brain be quiet for once, just please.. be quiet.." for hours till you eventually pass out sucks, it's all stupid and wasteful and humans are dumb. He's dumb. Everyone's dumb.

Tenderness:

Tyreen:

She'd see wanting it as being weak in a way, Ty doesn't need anyone for any reason, so she doesn't need intimacy or tenderness. Why would she? She's not weak, or soft. Not being able to touch others isn't even a factor here, don't you dare imply it is. Intimacy is for people who aren't strong enough to exist alone, don't insult her by thinking she'd ever want it. She watches those romcoms for the PLOT and the character development, did you see in that last episode of Skags of fire that Miguel finally got with Santia-

Seifa: Born 2 Tender (physically and monetarily)

She thrives off receiving and giving affection to close friends and partners, it's a part of herself she masks off from her general authoritative persona for a lot of reasons, people often see being caring or gentle as weak, and that's not something she can afford in day to day life.

People close to her know she's very tactile platonically, and an arm around a waist or shoulders is the norm if you're spending much time with her and she's in good spirits. She doesn't shy away from touch in general and has no problem initiating contact with anyone she trusts and is close enough with that she doesn't feel like being caring is a risk around. Intimacy and close tenderness with a partner is her main love language, and something she absolutely expects be provided to her.

Troy: Viciously envious of it

The last time he encountered freely platonic intimacy was in his childhood, both with Leda and Tyreen before Ty started to resent showing affection more and more as they got older. He's desperately, pathetically lonely and fully aware of that, even if he lies to himself that he's fine.

He can't request it from the people he sleeps with as it means showing them the real man under the persona, and he's learned that people do not like the real Troy, so he's starved of real intimacy despite having so much access to other people's bodies nightly.

Not all bad:

Troy

His intelligence.

It's one thing he can think back on and remember only ever receiving positive comments on, right from as early as he can recall. He's always been able to consider problems in a way that lets him break them down and approach them from a unique angle. Dad said he was able to "Think outside the box", but he never really understood what that meant till the twins landed on Pandora and he watched so many people run themselves into the ground when such simple solutions were right there. Maybe not moral solutions, but simple solutions regardless! He absorbs and retains information very easily without any real effort, and when he found out that wasn't the norm, it became a genuine point of pride for him. Something he was great at, unrelated to his persona.

Hips and thighs

While most of his upper body causes him physical pain or he dislikes in general for multiple uhh.. reasons, he's never had any issues with his lower body. He loves the definition of his hips and lower stomach, his knees haven't ever had any joint pain, his legs have always been toned and strong without really needing any focus on them. He's worked himself to the bone trying to fix the things about his upper body that he hates, but his legs? Nah. Nice :ok_hand:

He's really good at looking after plants

He's really good at it. Lots of people can't keep plants alive but he can :) No one knows about it, but he does. It's nice to be good at something. It's just ...nice. :)

Seifa

Her waist and stomach.

Sei is relatively curvy for her height and is very thankful for her narrow waist, or she'd look like a solid rectangle in heeled boots no matter what she wore. It helps her keep up the soft fem aesthetic she likes to mix with punk bullshit without much effort, gives her a shape in baggy engineering overalls, and keeps belt pouches ON. Like, ON on. Shit is never going to move. She has a slight soft curve to her lower stomach she used to hate, thinking it made her look overweight , but as she grew into her twenties learned to love. Other people liked it, she was just being a dumb kid.

Physical strength

Years of working with lugging heavy machinery has given her an unexpectedly solid core, and she'd have no problem lifting something, say, Troy weight, and flipping it over her low center of balance without a sweat. Which is very fun. On things that are Troy weight.

The loyalty she builds with others without trying

She's not sure what it is exactly she's been doing to prompt it, but over the last few years she's come to realise she has a genuine support network across the system of people who are very loyal to her, and are there when needed to back her up in trades, or filling positions she needs, or getting her in touch with a group she's got no foot in. People she works with or gets to know trust her and remember her even years later, it's been a nice thing to find out about herself, though she wishes she knew what exact thing about her was the source of it.

Asks are Open!

#borderlands 3 #bl3 #borderlands #troy calypso #calypso twins #leech lord #seifa #my hcs #my writing

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the-busy-ghost · 3 years

Text

Lords and Lairds and Ladles

And while I’m on the subject of names and titles, it’s worth pointing out another easily mixed up custom that prevailed until at least the end of the sixteenth century (and probably later, it’s not my specialty).

If you were a nobleman whose surname happened to be ‘Kennedy’ or ‘Douglas’ or ‘Gordon’, that does not mean that you would necessarily be referred to as Lord Kennedy or Lord Douglas or Lord Gordon. Those are very specific titles which belong to specific members of those families.

You MIGHT be referred to as ‘my lord’ as like an honorific, if you were a nobleman or a bishop or an abbot- for example, ‘my lord of Aberdeen’ would be the bishop of Aberdeen while ‘my lord of Murray’ could be either the bishop of Moray (most likely) or the earl of Moray (less likely, but still happened) or, very rarely, a nobleman with the surname Murray. However none of these people would hold the official title ‘Lord Aberdeen’ or ‘Lord Murray’, nor should they be referred to as such.

Sometimes contemporary sources do make mistakes- in particular English diplomats often got mixed up when referring to Scottish nobles, and they might, for example, refer to any male member Kennedy family as ‘Lord Kennedy’, even if they didn’t mean the person who actually held that title. But it does not seem to have been common practice back in the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries, and it certainly isn’t correct to refer to sixteenth century noblemen who didn’t hold a lordship of parliament using those titles in modern historical writing.

I am not au fait with English titles, but it seems that, nowadays, historians generally use the title ‘lord’ much more flexible- I have seen multiple members of the Howard family, alive at the same time, referred to as ‘Lord Howard’ in secondary sources. Whether that was actually the custom in the 16th century I don’t know, but certainly nobody seems to bat an eyelid now.

But as a general (flexible) rule, Lord Hamilton is the man who has been specifically granted the title, not just any nobleman with the surname Hamilton. In 1503, Lord Drummond refers usually to John, 1st Lord Drummond, not any of his sons, and not one of the lairds of Innerpeffray who also bore the surname Drummond. There is a level in the Scottish peerage known as being a ‘lord of parliament’ and these lordships of parliament are an important concept, if sometimes complex.

This is also why laird and lord are not exact synonyms. Yes laird initially stems from the concept of being someone’s lord, and most lords of parliament were also lairds (as were earls and dukes). Sometimes in poetry and prose you will find lord spelt like laird. But in a strict sense, lairds are a lower level of the nobility than the men called ‘Lord’- although lots of lairds, especially those employed at the royal court, could be influential too.

But when speaking plainly Lord Hume does not usually mean the same thing as ‘Laird Hume’. For example Alexander Hume, 3rd Lord Hume, who got his head cut off in 1516 was ‘Lord Hume’- he held the lordship of parliament and, though some might have disagreed, he would probably be thought of as representing the senior line of the family. Several of his kinsmen who bore the surname Hume were lairds though, such as the laird of Cowdenknowes and the laird of Wedderburn. Technically, Lord Hume was a laird too, in the explicit sense of someone who holds lordship over others. But a laird tended to be an ill-defined and lower level of lordship. Calling Lord Hume ‘Laird Hume’ would be like referring to the Duke of York solely by his knightly title Sir Edmund of Langley- he was both, but one of those is his highest title and the other is merely a subsidiary extra.

Hence how James Hamilton, 6th Laird of Cadzow is created, in 1445, James, 1st Lord Hamilton. His son was later created Earl of Arran in 1503. But while the Hamiltons were an important, large, and influential kindred, this did not mean that other male members of the family were Lord Hamilton. Sometimes they might be Lord Hamilton of XXX (a location) or given another title altogether like Lord Paisley (for Claud Hamilton, third son of the 2nd Earl, in 1587).

Alternatively Alexander Gordon, 2nd Lord Gordon, was made Earl of Huntly in 1457. In the sixteenth century we often find the eldest legitimate sons and heirs of the Earls of Huntly bearing the title Lord Gordon. Alternatively, they could be known as the ‘Master’ of Huntly, a common term indicating that the holder was the heir to the estate. But younger sons were not generally referred to as ‘Lord Gordon’ unless they had been granted possession of that lordship by the Earl of Huntly or someone with equal authority- for example, if they were the heir apparent while their older brother was childless. Otherwise they were usually just ‘my lord James Gordon’, or ‘Sir Adam Gordon of Auchindoun’ or ‘Alexander Gordon, the Laird of Lochinver’.

As for their ladies, both lords and lairds’ wives might be referred to as lady, but in slightly different ways. So, had she not already borne a title from her first marriage (Countess of Bothwell), the wife of Alexander, 3rd Lord Hume would have been “Agnes Stewart, Lady Hume”. However the wife of Lord Hume’s distant kinsman David Hume of Wedderburn would be “Alison Douglas, the Lady of Wedderburn”, and the wife of the laird of Cowdenknowes would be perhaps “[Dame] Elizabeth Stewart, [the] Lady [of] Cowdenknowes”. Obviously full names were not always given, and bits and pieces get added and taken away, this was just to give a rough idea.

DAUGHTERS on the other hand are never Lady Hume or Lady Elphinstone, unless they inherited the lordship. Lord Erskine’s wife is Lady Erskine, but his daughters are not all Lady Erskine as well, though they might become ladies of their husband’s title- Margaret Erskine, Lady of Lochleven because she married the laird (not lord) of Lochleven. Though their first name might be put in there to make it easier- Lady/Mistress Barbara Hamilton for example, who then becomes ‘Dame Barbara Hamilton, Lady Gordon’ or Lady Janet Stewart/Mistress Stewart who becomes ‘Dame Janet Stewart, Lady Fleming’ but never just Lady Stewart.

The way people are ‘referred’ to in sources from sixteenth century Scotland is very fluid and flexible (and it doesn’t help that a lot of sources are from English or French writers who didn’t know the difference anyway). But from a modern perspective there are just certain unwritten rules. They’re generally easier to pick up naturally through reading primary and secondary sources than to explain exactly. The concept of a ‘laird’ is often confusing and ill-defined, but a lordship of parliament on the other hand meant something. Lord Crichton was not the same as Lord Crichton of Sanquhar, and certainly not the same as any number of lairds or younger sons who had the surname Crichton but held lands that weren’t associated with the lordship of parliament. Lord Lindsay of Crawford referred to the men who became earls of Crawford, but there was also Lord Lindsay of the Byres, and then a bunch of lairds and knights like Sir David Lindsay of the Mount who shouldn’t strictly be called ‘Lord Lindsay’. Stewart of Innermeath, Stewart of Darnley (later son of the earl of Lennox) and Stewart of Ochiltree all held lordships of parliament, but usually they would be referred to as Lord Innermeath, Lord Darnley, and Lord Ochiltree, even if theoretically they were all Lords Stewart. Then there’s a whole host of minor branches of the Stewart family whose heads can loosely be described as lairds, not lords. And in the plural, for example when referring to the political community, people usually refer to the Scots lords (as in the ‘lords of the parliament’ or ‘lords of the council’) not the Scottish lairds.

And then of course churchmen come along and mess everything up even further, but we won’t get into that.

#It's messy and much easier to just Get once you've done a bit of reading and absorbed the info by osmosis #This is not strictly in line with strict heraldic titles of the 21st century #But if I see one more butchered title in a popular novel or history book I will scream #That being said I know it's a pain so I can answer questions if anybody has any #Can't promise I'll always be 100% correct but there's a good chance

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modmamono · 4 years

Text

Why Space Channel 5 is one of SEGA’s best dumbest games ever, no questions asked. (Report 1 & 1/2.)

Space Channel 5 on the Dreamcast is one of my favorite things ever, let alone favorite video games. Though I more often watch it on YouTube then actually play it.

For those not in the know, Space Channel 5 is a game series developed by United Game Artists and published by parent company SEGA. And that’s the most Wikipedia quoting I’m gonna do in this gush piece.

There aren’t many games quite like this rhythmic, Simon says game. At least in style because this game has that in spades, the gameplay anyone can do. And I am not at all qualified to explain its style because I wouldn’t how to describe it as besides maybe very 70s?

Point is there’s something charming about this game, and I think SEGA agrees with me on that. The lead character, Ulala (seen above), appear in these games to name a few years after new Space Channel 5 games stopped being made after 2002:

2004: Sega Superstars

2006: Sonic Riders

2008: Sega Superstars Tennis and Samba de Amigo

2010: Sonic & Sega All-Stars Racing

2012: Sonic & All-Stars Racing Transformed and Project X Zone

2015: Project X Zone 2

And not to mention the invading aliens have been skins of the titular Puyo Puyo in that series for a while I can’t determine. Possibly since at most 2007 up until current day with Puyo Puyo Champions in 2018/2019.

ALSO not to mention the VR game that came out recently! (How could I forget that? That’s the main reason I’m doing this.)

So it is clear SEGA loves this game and it’s sequel a lot. I don’t think their most beloved cult classic NiGHTS: Into Dreams gets that much love from the company though it certainly does get a lot itself, most games wish their parents still loved them that much long after they had a game. Anyway...

Now the part where I actually talk about the game.

I wanna say, first and foremost. This is not a review of the game. This is just gushing about why this game makes me happy.

And everything I’m gushing about is just what you get from the from one playthrough of the game. Save for one exception, I will not be talking about supplementary material, nor Space Channel 5′s lore.

And yes, this colorful dancing/rhythm/simon says game has lore. Basically any non-repeated character model has their own biograph. So I will not go into that.

You’re not missing too much, there are interesting tidbits, sometimes they fill you in on background details of the story.

Speaking of the story. I’ll start in a second. But if this is new to you, you can watch it here first (The first playthrough is only half the video):

youtube

Prologue:

We start off with a bunch of alien sitting on a space couch watching space TV. These aliens are known as the Morolians and they’ll be the main antagonists for the evening.

This cutscene has no dialogue, so this is all open to interpretation for a first time viewer. Though I do enjoy this split second foreshadowing:

And that’s when the title screen appears. Blasting you with the series’ main theme Mexican Flyer. Look it up if you must. You’ll be hearing it a lot, it’s the game and Ulala’s leitmotif.

Report 1: This is terrorism attack on an airport... I’m gonna ignore that.

This is the only piece of supplemental material I’ll talk about, as it’s present in the game itself, but not elaborated on, and it is important to two of the character.

The game starts in a flashback. In the year AD 2489 a spaceship exploded. Everybody on board died safe for a little girl.

She was rescued by a man working for Space Channel 5. A news organization that with a specific focus on dancing. That last bit is nothing special though, as everything in this galaxy revolves around dancing.

After the little girl is saved by this kindly Channel 5 Gent (Age 25) she knew what she wanted to be after she grew up. She wanted to be a sexy dancing reporter for Space Channel 5 just like him (presumably). And to meet him so she can thank him in person.

10 years later......

It is AD 2499! And the Morolians attack a space airport and their ray beams hypnotize people to dance silly.

THE HORROR!

And that’s when Space Channel 5 sends in Ulala to report on the progress.

But what they’re actually doing is for Ulala to solve the problem instead of the Space authorities.

One character I do wanna mention now is that Ulala’s producer, Fuse, is an unseen character yet is important later. He’s the one briefing Ulala in the screenshot above. And oversees Ulala’s every move.

Also Ulala never got to meet her rescuer. He either left shortly after Ulala got rescued, or shortly before Ulala joined. Given what we learn later, likely the former.

Anyway onto the show:

BAM!

BAM!!

BAM!!!

I will always love that. Ulala got down on the ground in the panicking space air port to coolly report on the panic.

As quick aside, I wanna mention that Ulala doesn’t run in this game, she slowly struts and all of her struts are simply majestic. And those amazing struts lead her to the first gameplay section of this game.

Some Morolians hold a few hypnotized people hostage. This is is a dance battle. Meaning you got repeat exactly what the aliens do in the exact rhythm they did it in order to save the hostages. And I love this gameplay. It’s simple yet fun (provided you got minimal lag, you should look into that if you wanna play this game).

The controls are:

Up: Up

Down: Down

Left: Left

Right: Right/Light

Button 1: Chu (Aliens)

Button 2: Chu (Humans)

And this is how normal people settle things in this world apparently:

Party 1 (usually the Aliens) make up a tough but fair pattern for Ulala to copy in the hopes of psyching her out.

Party 2 (Ulala & Co.) gets as many chances ad she got. And the better she does more people tune into her news report. If she wins she gets what she wants. Saving the hostage and getting Party 1 out of her hair.

Every single one lives by this code of honor and I honestly have no clue if there’s an in-universe reason. But I love it regardless. I love it when people say: Up Down Chu Chu Chu. And the Ulala repeating it.

Though frankly, I don’t like it when the Morolians issue the commands. I like it when others do the exact same commands in this same game, so it’s a little bit of a bummer the Morolians do it.

Anyways. You save the hostages and they join in on Ulala’s unstoppable strut as will always happen if you rescue people. And they strut to the second gameplay type: The Shoot-out.

The controls are the same as the above but now you gotta watch out for humans in the mix.

In general these are trickier. And I might go into that later. But they do work on the same rules.

Don’t worry I won’t go over every dance or shoot-out unless there’s something special about it.

Also I’m pretty sure you kill people if you push the wrong Chu. Don’t do that, it’s bad for the ratings!

Skipping over three battles.Something new happens, rival space news station: Space(?) Channel 42 has a reporter of their own out on the field. And that reporter is planning to steal Channel 5′s viewership. And this is HER!

You do a dance battle and she dies.

Though seriously, I like this game does this. It’s not only aliens you fight, but other factions of the Space News Media. And it’s always a nice shake up when someone besides her shows up.

You see, for the most part any reoccurring enemy has recognizable mannerisms you gotta batlle, and her is no different. It’s hard to describe for me. You kinda gotta play or watch the game for yourself to see what I mean, but I think it’s best exemplified in Report 2. And the following games.

Though one thing’s for sure, each non-normal Morolians or rival reported does bring their own genre switch with them. Heck sometimes even normal battles have unique genres. I’m am not musically inclined so I wouldn’t know hers or most others.

Any way, before she dies she give an emotional speech and gracefully suggests to take her Channel 42 guitarist with her and Ulala accepts that’s the least she could do for a lousy reporter like her.

And then it’s boss time!

Yeah, actual bosses with actual boss characters. And not like the recently deceased as shown above. She’s practically for all intents and purposes another Morolian dance battle.

And it’s down to funky jazz music, not unlike what you’d see in Sonic Adventure! Even Ulala comments on it, confirming it’s dietetic Where does it come from? Not sure, there might be an explanation somewhere. But do keep that in mind. That the music we hear is also the music the characters hear as well.

Anyways:

Not Pictured: Super Stretchy Arms.

I think it’s a bit of a misnomer. Invader is correct, that’s what it’s here for. But is it really a robot? It moves like an organics and is a bit rubbery. This basically goes for all Morolian robots.

I can suspend my disbelief. You shouldn’t nitpick too much about Space Channel 5, it doesn’t want you to think too hard about it’s world even if there’s a lot to it. I’d be concerned if Space Channel 5 did wanna put its story and world building first and foremost.

But “Hypnotized Robot Invader”?

What?

Spoiler.

Robots and hypnotism... I’m pretty sure a sign that we made perfect human-like Artificial Intelligence if they can fall susceptible to Hypnosis. Even then I doubt it.

Sorry, that’s always bothered me, I get what they mean by it. It’s just the word choice... Did they mean Hypnotizing Robot Invader? This boss is great.

It starts off with a normal dance battle, but you get to watch a new Morolian enemy’s moves. It’s also quicker on the draw along with a few softballs to throw your timing off. Pretty good stuff.

And that applies to the next phase as well, where the the shooting starts.

I don’t have much to say.

Unlike the robot’s final phase where it’s the first phase again, but with guns and the robot goes to berserking speeds with the input commands.

And after you beat it, it joins you in a strut.

As does everyone you saved, No matter the gender, nor age, nobody is embarrassed imitating Ulala no matter what she does. We’ll be half as lucky to get a cool future as cool as 2499.

And with that the first report is over.

Report 2: (Age 35)

At the Morolian HQ (Presumably), their boss doesn’t like failure.

But like a good boss he doesn’t dwell on failure and moves on to the next plan. One of his lackeys has this plan: Another boss battle dance robot who operates on:

The everyone at the table is impressed. So I guess Ulala is screwed, game over.

This level is more of the same as the last one more or less, it’s possibly the most boring level in the series in that regard. It’s not bad, this is just the game bulding enough a status quo before they change things up in Report 3.

But that doesn’t make this level any less interesting to talk about, so I won’t go over it much.

The short story until something new happens is: Space Ship (think of it as a fancy yacht but in space) is being attack by Morolians, Ulala is send to report on it, and being the professional she is saves hostages as well.

She saves the captain, crew members, stewardesses, waitresses, the Space Diva (OH NO! NOT THE SPACE DIVA!), passages and the like.

UNTIL!

He voice says “I’m gonna steal you show, Space Channel 5”. And you see this ship flying by:

Another rival reporter, this one a pirate broadcasting station.

Side note: That’s sounds like the most important kind of pirate ever. Alternative news/non-mainstream with no money/rating motive blinding everything with journalistic integrity? Yes, by all means. If they’re pirates then so are Secular Talk & The Humanist Report.

Back to the silly dance game. The Pirates either jam or hack Channel 5′s signal and the Ulala is stuck with them for a while.

And then we meet that where we meet the gent above.

“[His] name is:“

“JAGUAAAAARRRR!!!” “JAGUAAAAARRRR!!!“

(Age 35)

LET’S DANCE!

Dude, I love Jaguar (Age 35) he’s gotta be my second favorite character in the series on account he’s just cool and incapable of embarrassment.

Remember the deceased of the last report? The Channel 42 reporter in the blue dress? He’s her counterpart for this chapter.

But whereas the deceased’s gimmick sounded air headed for a lack of a better term. Maybe, girly? Point is, battling her didn’t feel too dissimilar to battling Morolians despite her rhytmic mannerisms.

Jaguar (Age 35)’s gimmick is that he just adds. He starts with a simple Up. And then he adds a Chu, and another Chu. Eventually it becomes a really long chain of commands, it has to be some of the longest in the series. And you have to do them all from start to finish because he does them all sequentially. Can you repeat?:

Up. Chu. ChuChu. Right. Left. Down. DownDown. Down. Chu. Chu. Chu.

He is easing you into it, but it is by no means an easy fight. Because after the chain is at its longest, he just spamming ChuChuChu in quick succession. And then a simple Chu.

After defeat Jaguar & Co, escape by jet-pack, saying they will meet later.

This battle is a highlight for me. Coco Tapioco and the big bosses to come are better if you ask me (with exceptions). But Jaguar (Age 35) is some of the best the normal gameplay goes.

And you could argue what normal means in the context of Space Channel 5. But effectively, like Channel 42′s deceased, functionally he might as well be another Morolian if he wasn’t there to be set up for later. Because you do get person that just joins your Strut Club like everywhere else.

You gain his Jazz Man and you get a great sax solo as a reward beating him. Like how you got Channel 42′s guitarist for beating them. I like the think the Jazz Man can work for Jaguar (Age 35) again while the Channel 42 Guitarist is blacklisted.

And before we move on from Jaguar (Age 35) check out his Chu pose:

BOSS TIME!

Jaguar (Age 35): The alien mothership is retreating. Don’t you have to follow them, Channel 5? Fuse: Blast you, Jaguar [Age 35].

With the pirates giving chase, Ulala is left with the cowardly alien robot to elegant music.

Ignoring the robot’s title, while silly, its cowardice is its greatest asset. For it has kidnapped some space schoolkids, making their space teacher worry. Their space teacher can actually be seen at the start of the report.

Space fashion, am I right?

I’ve exceeded Tumblr’s invisible limit of what to put in a blog post. I’ll have to rewrite this boss what I have to say for this boss. So full, can’t spell check! We’ll be back!

#space channel 5 #sc5 #ulala #dreamcast #chu #gushing #jaguar #fuse #pudding #coco tapioca #morolina #morolians

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qaraxuanzenith · 5 years

Text

On Representation: A review of The Tyrant’s Tomb

It’s still too early to go to sleep and I have nothing better to productively do, so: time for me to rant angrily about representation.

IMPORTANT WARNING: this will include some (probably minor?) spoilers for The Tyrant’s Tomb by Rick Riordan. Since I’m pretending it’s a review of that book even though it is really just my angry thoughts about representation that were prompted by it. There will also be (definitely minor) spoilers about a character in Rick Riordan’s Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard series.

Edit: this rant is long, in addition to the spoilers, so please (but actually, please) read it after the cut.

Okay. First of all: I enjoyed The Tyrant’s Tomb. I’ve been loving the Trials of Apollo series, and this is no exception, and I’m excited for the next book. But.

I have ranted, a lot, about representation before, because I so rarely see Jewish characters in books not written exclusively by and for Jews, and even rarer do I see observant Jewish characters in any media not created exclusively by and for Orthodox Jews. And obviously, I want to feel reflected in at least some of the mainstream media I consume.

The important preface to this rant is a quick review, though I have discussed this, too, before, of the intense pleasure and pain brought on by reading the character of Samirah al-Abbas in Rick Riordan’s Magnus Chase books. Samirah was almost, almost, almost the Holy Grail of “observant religious character” that I had described, almost to a T, of what I am constantly seeking in media: she was a major character, whose religion was a major part of her life in tangible ways throughout the books - from wearing her hijab, to observing modesty in her interactions with her fiance, to performing heroics while fasting for Ramadan - and yet who was characterized well enough that her religion, while inextricably an important part of her life, wasn’t her entire character, either. It was beautiful; it was magnificently done.

And it broke my heart. Because God knows observant Muslim people have deserved Samirah for so long; but her existence on these pages only drove home to me that what I was looking for was possible and yet, impossibly, I still didn’t have it. Samirah was fantastic, but she still wasn’t the representation that I was looking for: I wanted, and still want, those traits, but for a Jewish character, in whom I can see something of myself. I want Samirah, but I want that for me, too.

Flip ahead a couple years (and a few more representation in media rants) to me picking up and reading The Tyrant’s Tomb. I’d pre-ordered it in the summer, while ordering a few books as a birthday present to my sister, and promptly forgotten about it, so when it arrived, it was like a delightful gift from Past Me.

I started reading, and I was so, so excited when the character of Lavinia was introduced, right near the beginning of the book. Right away, Riordan telegraphed that she was both Jewish and queer, with the Magen David necklace and her interest in a female dryad. I was primed and ready to both love her and see myself in her.

And then I was let down.

Now, before I dig deep into the many ways in which Lavinia was a complete and utter disappointment, I want to offer an important caveat, referring to my preface about Samirah. I don’t want to give the impression that I’m castigating Riordan for trying, when so many other mainstream writers don’t. At least he made her canonically Jewish on-page, rather than hiding behind a Jewish-sounding last name and then declaring it to be the truth off-page (looking at you, Rowling and Anthony Goldstein). At least there is a Jewish character in his books (looking at... almost every other mainstream YA fantasy series I’ve ever read not written by Jews).

But the thing is, we raise our expectations of people based on what we know they are capable of. I’m a teacher; a level 3 “Meets Expectations” is going to look different for my academically-struggling student who is working really hard to improve, as opposed to my bookworm student who started the year off by turning in a long and erudite personal essay.

Most of those other mainstream YA fantasy writers, I don’t have any expectations of. Whereas Rick Riordan, the man who created Samirah al-Abbas: I know exactly what he is capable of. Which is why it hurts so much more that, when it comes to a Jewish character, he falls so strikingly short.

I’ll be fair: I wasn’t expecting a second, Jewish Samirah from him. That wouldn’t be reasonable. I would like that, someday, from someone, but that will have to be in someone else’s book; it wouldn’t make sense for Riordan to retread the exact same ground, and I understand that.

And Lavinia didn’t have to be observant - as I’ve recognized, he already has Samirah for that. But I was hoping, expecting, for her to be something more than Jewish In Name Only. (Strike that: she may have been Jewish on-page, but Riordan never even used the J word. He wrote around it. Why? I don’t know. Presumably not just to disappoint me.)

So what’s wrong with Lavinia? And how could he have done better with her?

Great news: I’ve got a bulleted list to help with that, starting with the simple and working our way up.

To start with: her last name. I’ve been going over and over this dozens of times, and I still can’t quite work out why, for his one Jewish character, Riordan decided to give her the last name of one of the most famous Jewish speculative fiction writers, and then (a) never once acknowledge this connection, and (b) acknowledge that she shares her name with a famous Jewish... fictional dancer. Why Asimov, if he wasn’t going to say anything at all about the Asimov?

Continuing with her name: her first name. I get that Riordan likes to give Romanesque names to the Roman demigods, but this overlooks the fact that the demigods are almost always named by their human parent; and while Sally Jackson had her reasons for naming her son after a Greek hero, most Jewish parents will give their child a Jewish name, if not the actual name of a recently-deceased relative. But okay. Fine. I wouldn’t want to mess with the thematic naming in the book; but how about a name that evokes the intersection of Roman and Jewish history: Salome, or Salome Alexandra, for instance?

Speaking of that intersection of Roman and Jewish: I’m still too relieved at finding a Jewish character, any Jewish character, in his books, to be offended that this Jewish character ends the book as a centurion in a Roman army, but - she should be. Lavinia should, at some point in the book, have expressed discomfort at the Roman side of her heritage, as it intersects with her Jewish culture and history. And it would have been so easy: throughout the book, Lavinia has problems with authority and with the structures of the Legion in particular. Just once, she could have defended that rebelliousness - honestly or not - with a reference to how the Roman legions once destroyed her people’s Temple, razed her homeland, and subjugated her people with an exile that is still, in many ways, ongoing to this day. Not in so many words, obviously; I’m not asking Riordan to write it the way I did. Just something like “Yeah, well, Roman Legions and Jews aren’t usually a good mix.” Or here’s another way she could have expressed her Roman discomfort: in that conversation about awkwardness. Instead of “You want awkward? Try telling your Rabbi that you’re taking a girl as your date to your Bat Mitzvah,” she could have said: “You want awkward? Try being a Jewish demigod.” “You want awkward? Try being a queer Jew in a Roman legion.”

SPEAKING OF THAT INSANE AND PERPLEXING COMMENT ABOUT RABBIS AND BAT MITZVAHS, I have so so so many problems with that line:

First of all, given the premise that Lavinia as written is very clearly not an observant Jew by any means or interpretation, and does not appear to have any Jewish community ties, it is strange to me that she speaks about having a rabbi. Typically, people who have a rabbi are either (a) observant people who go to this rabbi with religious questions, or (b) community-oriented people who see the rabbi of their community (or another chosen spiritual leader in their chosen community) as their rabbi. Lavinia appears to be neither, so why “try telling your rabbi that...” and not, say, “try telling the rabbi at your shul that...”?

Okay but forget whose rabbi this is: why is she telling the rabbi about her date? Why is that necessary? For those (like Rick Riordan??) unfamiliar with what a Bat Mitzvah is: A Bat Mitzvah is actually the term for a (female) person who has reached the age of religious responsibility in Judaism, and it happens automatically when a girl turns 12 (and for a boy - Bar Mitzvah - when he turns 13). But okay, I’ll stop being so pedantic, and agree that Riordan, and Lavinia, were obviously referring to the party that is commonly held to celebrate this milestone. But that’s all it is: a party celebrating a milestone. Although there is often a prayer service and/or a Torah reading, there is no ritual aspect to a Bat Mitzvah celebration. Other than, again, perhaps the prayer service / Torah reading, there is definitely nothing you would need to inform a rabbi of. You would definitely not be telling the rabbi about your guest list, unless the rabbi is your parent/guardian / the person paying for the party.

But never mind who she’s telling about her date: did you miss the part where I noted that a Bat Mitzvah is for a girl turning twelve. Speaking as somebody who has celebrated a Bat Mitzvah for myself, and who has attended many such celebrations as a guest, I can tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt: you do not invite a date to this event, whether you are a guest or the girl of honour. For one thing, you are twelve. Twelve is too young to be bringing dates! For another, you’re going to a party full of twelve-year-olds, where there will be maybe a prayer service and then a nice meal and then probably a bunch of twelve-year-olds bopping around to some obnoxiously loud music. I get Lavinia’s trying to let us know she was already very gay when she was twelve, but that does not explain bringing a date, female or otherwise, to her own Bat Mitzvah. Just ask the girl as a normal guest and then awkwardly ask her to dance, for heaven’s sake!

In conclusion, that entire sentence made no sense, and it really only accomplished two things: (a) it gave me the impression, rightly or wrongly, that Riordan knows absolutely nothing about Judaism; and (b) it strongly implied, unfairly, that rabbis in general are homophobic, which it why it was so awkward for Lavinia to tell her rabbi about her nonsensical date.

Throughout the book, Lavinia’s big crusade is ecological safety, protecting the nature spirits and the environment, and the homeless people living in the park who would be impacted by the Emperors’ attacks. It would have been so easy to infuse this important aspect of her personality with her Jewishness, by just letting her throw around the term “tikun olam” in that context. It would have absolutely fit with the culturally-not-religiously Jewish air he was clearly going for, and it would have made her seem 10,000% more authentically Jewish to me, with just, my God, two words added to the entire book.

You want another way to make her seem more realistically, three-dimensionally Jewish? How about, oh, I dunno, her one Jewish parent? (By the way: it has not slipped my attention that Lavinia’s one Jewish parent is her father, meaning that except by Reform definitions, she’s not, technically, Jewish at all; just canonically connected to Jewish culture. Are paternal Jews who consider themselves Jewish valid and Jewish? Of course. Am I nonetheless extremely disappointed that he’s managed to water down the Jewishness of his one Jewish character in 20+ books in this additional way? Absolutely.) Apollo showed great interest in asking her about her father, the famous Asimov... dancer (I’m sorry, I still can’t get over that he named her Asimov and did not make a single reference to Asimov; is Isaac Asimov the only Jew he’s ever heard of or something???). She could have alluded to his Jewishness. “Yeah, Sergei’s still mad that I stopped coming to our Asimov family Seders.”

Instead, other than the absurd-and-mildly-offensive rabbi-and-Bat-Mitzvah line, what is the only evidence we have that Lavinia even is of Jewish descent? Ah, yes. The thing that got me so excited in the first place, as - or so I thought - a hint of Jewishness to come: her Magen David necklace. Except of course, Riordan only ever calls it a “Star of David,” because - okay, that’s what Apollo would call it in his narration, and of course Lavinia never said a word about it, despite all the times she played with it. Never explained where she got it from, or why she wore it, or what made it so important to her. So it had no sentimental or cultural value conveyed to the reader. It was just a visual cue to tell us: “Jewish character.” It was as anemic and anodyne a way of making her Jewish as the Menorah-on-the-Mantelpiece trick that I’ve often complained about in TV shows that want to suddenly establish a character is Jewish - except worse, because at least with a Menorah on the mantel, we’ve got the implication that somebody lights it (if it’s a Chanukiyah) on Chanukah. This is just a star, on a necklace.

In conclusion: Lavinia could have been great. She could have been a queer Jewish demigod, passionate about nature and about tikun olam, complex and uncomfortable with her role as a Jewish person in the Legion despite her absolute commitment to helping her friends survive the attack and defeat their dangerous enemies.

Instead, she was a disappointment. She was characterized well, for what she was. But what she was was a girl with a necklace. A queer Roman demigod with a famous dancer father.

I started this rant expecting to call her Jewish in name only. But she wasn’t even that.

Perhaps it’s unfair of me to call Lavinia a disappointment, from how anemic her Jewishness was. The real disappointment in The Tyrant’s Tomb was Rick Riordan.

#representation #jewish representation #representation done right #representation done wrong #representation in media #representation matters #trials of apollo #the tyrants tomb #rick riordan #lavinia asimov #am i jewish tumblr #rant #representation rant #review #not actually a book review #not lies either though #judaism #failed representation #samirah al abbas

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pandawritespoorly · 4 years

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With Time: Chapter 13 - Confidence in Progress

Author’s Note: Here we are, posting more With Time! I love the response to the akuma in the last chapter, it was a ...unique thing to write. Anyways, without further ado, here's chapter 13!

Chapter Summary: Marinette talks with Fu quickly. The Quantics and Co. bake cookies.

First | Previous | Saturday

Marinette knocks on the door, waiting for the Guardian to open the door.

She doesn’t have to wait long, she’s allowed in quickly, “Ah, Marinette, we’ve been expecting you.” Master Fu speaks calmly.

“You have?” Did she mess up that bad?

“When Wayzz and I saw that The Revealer lasted so long, we were certain it would not be long before Tikki or Plagg fell ill. It would seem Tikki is the first.”

“Given Plagg’s nature to take longer breaks, that is no surprise.” The turtle Kwami shows up above Fu’s shoulder. They walk into the same room where Tikki first got healed. Marinette lifts her Kwami gingerly from her bag and gives her to Master Fu, who nods and begins.

After the ceremony is finished, Tikki munches happily on a cookie in front of Marinette.

“Master?” She’s been debating this for so long, postponing and procrastinating as long as she can, but being here already, she has no more excuses. “Yes, Marinette?”

“I can’t call on Rena Rouge or Carapace anymore.” Given how she reacted to simply seeing Alya and Lila, there is no hope that she can work efficiently as a team with them anymore. She studies the floorboards, unable to meet his eyes. She failed to choose heroes well. He’s going to be so disappointed.

He sips from his tea calmly, “Why is that?”

“I- you told me to choose someone I can trust, and…”

“And you no longer you feel that your choices are worthy of that honor.” She would have phrased it a little differently, more along the lines of fearing the wrath of a betrayed friend, but maybe she can think of it that way instead. It feels better that way.

“...yes.”

“Very well. It is understandable to come along bumps in the road. You are a smart heroine, Marinette, I will trust your judgement.”

“But what if I choose wrong again? How many ‘bumps in the road’ will there be?” She doesn’t want to mess up again. Not after last time.

“Perhaps you should consider the actions of a hero. When I looked for people to become the holders of the Black Cat and Ladybug miraculouses, I considered their actions. You, as well as your partner, proved yourselves to already being capable of heroic acts, without the jewelry.”

“So I need to find people who… already act like heroes?” She finally meets his eyes, and finds nothing negative in them.

“Indeed. Being heroic does not require magic jewelry.” He pours more tea for himself, “You mentioned that Rena Rouge and Carapace would not be fighting anymore, but what of Queen Bee?”

That didn’t even occur to her. She’d not even considered Chloe, because the blonde had been less involved in the actions leading up to Marinette’s transfer. No, that isn’t entirely right. She’d been involved, but in a positive way. She’d been the one to bring her home on Thursday, calming her down in the bathroom.

She’d even apologized for her past actions.

“I- I think there will be a new holder for the Bee miraculous as well.” “But…?”

“But I think that having the miraculous has helped Chloe change. For the better. I think that if I needed back-up and she was available, I would choose her. I trust her - more that Rena and Carapace.”

“So in the event that you require the assistance of the Bee, or if the new Bee holder is unavailable, you would allow Ms. Bourgeois to take up the title temporarily?” Master Fu looks to her for confirmation.

“Yes. I would.” She nods.

“I will inform Trixx and Pollen.” Wayzz floats up from his snack. Marinette feels bad, he and Nino seemed to get along well.

“I’m sorry, Wayzz.”

“It is quite alright, Marinette. I was aware from the start that the arrangement may not be permanent. I do regret that Nino made the choices he did. Perhaps this will be a learning experience for him. I can only hope.”

Marinette smiles weakly at him and he flies to the Miracle Box. Her phone dings in her pocket.

“Perhaps you should be on your way. Unless there is anything else?”

“No, Master.” She starts toward the door, “Thank you.”

Once outside she glances around quickly before looking to her purse.

“How do you feel, Tikki?” The little Kwami looks a lot better, she’s sitting in the purse looking up at Marinette with bright eyes holding a cookie in her paws.

“Much better, thank you!”

“It wasn’t a problem, you were sick, I couldn’t leave you like that.” What if there had been another akuma? Tikki would have felt even worse after that, and that would be terrible.

“Why am I any different than you?” She knows the Kwami is thinking of her behaviour on Saturday, overworking herself to get her to the point that she got to. Marinette shakes her head.

Why is it different? It just is. Tikki is the Kwami of Creation and Marinette is just some human girl. But she’s Ladybug, she’s a hero. Maybe it isn’t that diff-

Tikki makes surprised squeak and ducks back into her bag, Marinette glances up and sees Adrien coming this way. She’s still standing in front of Fu’s place and there’s no way she could leave without catching his eye.

He hasn’t noticed her yet, due to how intently he’s looking into his bag, seemingly talking to himself. Once he reaches the massage shop, he stops and looks to the door. He finally notices Marinette and pauses, staring at her in slight confusion,”Oh, uh, hey Marinette. What are you doing here?”

“I- uh, um, tea! My… maman! Yes, my maman wanted some tea and sent me here! For the tea!” she smiles convincingly, “Wh-what about you?”

“My uh, Chinese tutor, uh wanted me to come to him today, so… yeah.”

She nods, that makes sense.

“Actually, Mari, how are you?” He cocks his head at her slightly, looking at her caringly.

“What?” Did she worry him somehow? How did she do that? Why did she do that?

“I, um, happened to be near your school during the akuma attack. I saw Alya and Lila… it looked like you had noticed them too? I just, uh, tried to distract them. They’re back at Fr- school now.”

Right. Alya. And Lila. Do they know? Do they know where she goes now? Are they going to find her? They’re going to find her at school tomorrow. They’re going to confront her, her friends will find out just how much she sucks, they’ll hate her too, because of course they would that’s what she des-

Adrien puts a hand on her shoulder, interrupting her spiraling, “Marinette.”

“R-right. Um, I’m good. I-I’m fine.” He looks at her doubtfully, but before he can say anything more, she continues,”Anyways, I should get this tea! Back to Maman! And you, probably need to uh, get tutored! For chinese! Ummm… yup! Bye!” She turns and hurries away, waving over her shoulder at him as she goes.

The rules. The rules. She can’t just disregard the rules.

Rule #6: If asked, you’re doing good

She’s good. Absolutely fine. Perfectly great. No need for anyone to worry about her. Her phone dings again.

Right! She’d completely forgotten that someone had texted her. She’d ignored someone. They were probably worried about her now. Stupid.

Rule #11: Adrien, Claude, Allegra, Allan, and Felix have been nice enough to put up with you, don’t make them regret it.

Or it’s her parents, who don’t have a choice in enduring her stupidity. Either way, she’d ignored someone for longer than necessary and now they’d either been forced to check with her again or they were finally letting her know that they’re done with her nonsense.

Kid Mime: hey if u want to come over when ur dun u can!

Kid Mime: were mking cookies

HE LOVES US: I fear they may burn down the building.

HE LOVES US: ...

Felix: Marinette, excuse me for a moment to exact revenge on Claude.

The Mom Friend: dont worry

The Mom Friend: there fine

Oh. They weren’t mad. They didn’t hate her.

Yet.

Maybe she should go? They wouldn’t hate her for it if she’d been invited. They were making cookies, that would be fun.

You’d get in the way. You’ll be that killjoy that gets too specific about the recipe.

“You should go!” Tikki has made her way onto the girl’s shoulder, “Cookies are fun!”

Tikki likes cookies. She would go for Tikki. That’s okay, right? It’s not selfish if you’re going for someone else?

Patiserie Princess: im on my way

---

As soon as she knocks on the door, it opens and she is whisked into Claude’s kitchen, where chaos is likely about to ensue. There are, presumably, all the ingredients necessary out along with a few measuring cups. There’s a bowl on the counter that might be meant for mixing all the ingredients, but it’s probably too small. The stove has a pot on it but the stove is off. Claude already has some flour on him, despite the flour being closed. Allan is taking out a few more ingredients, while Felix sits at the counter with tea, content to watch for now. It’s probably a good choice considering his black clothing would display any and all flour that lands on it.

Something is placed on her head. She looks up to see Allegra beside her.

“Thank goodness you’re here. Claude decided I’m in charge and I don’t know what I’m doing. You’ve got the hat so you’re in charge now.”

“M-me?! Are you sure I should?”

“You live in a bakery, and regularly assist in baking goods for sale. Of all of us you will be the most capable of directing us in creating baked goods.” Felix sips his tea as he says this.

“Yay! Marinette’s here to save us!” Claude throws his arms in the air as Allan puts the last of the ingredients on the counter.

“Hey, ‘Nette.” he looks at the chef’s hat, “So what do we do?”

“I don’t know, uh… where’s the recipe?” She still wasn’t convinced that she is the best to be in charge. They’ve never seen her as a leader, are they sure they want her to do this?

Allegra hands her a sheet of paper printed from a website. Marinette skims it quickly. It’s pretty good, but being raised by two bakers she makes some small adjustments in her head. Used to correcting recipes at home, she grabs a pen and quickly scribbles them onto the paper. Something in her switches, and she steps back with a mindset she hasn’t used in her civilian life since before. Her friends see the different expression - a new one for them - and smile.

“Alright, so first we’re going to need to melt the butter. Allan, I’m going to need to you turn the stove to a medium heat and keep an eye on it. Once it is boiling, stir it constantly until it is an amber color. At that point let it cool for twenty minutes.”

She hands him the two sticks of butter and turns to Claude and Allegra, “You two should measure out and mix the dry ingredients.” She hands them the corrected sheet, “And you’re going to want a bigger bowl.” She approves their new bowl, taking the old one with her as she clears a space a little away from the others to cut up the pretzels.

While they’re all distracted by their tasks, there’s a knock at the door. Felix stands and opens it, allowing Adrien into the kitchen. He starts to speak, but stops abruptly as he takes in the scene before him.

At this point Allegra and Claude have finished mixing and are just talking. Marinette has mixed the chocolate and butterscotch chips and pretzels together in a bowl. She’s standing at the stove with Allan and they’re talking as well. Felix has returned to his tea and none of those involved in the baking have noticed him yet. A timer beeps and Marinette straightens.

“Alright, the butter is cool now. Allegra, can you put the eggs and vanilla in with the butter? Allan can you do the brown sugar? I can mix it, and Claude, you can mix in the stuff in the other bowl when we get to that point.” Marinette is entirely in her element, having been raised on recipes that were probably more complicated than this one. She knows what to do and is easily directing those around her to include them all in the process.

Adrien hasn’t seen her so comfortable and confident - especially when directing others - in, well, a while now. It’s nice to see. He decides against interrupting and sits next to Felix to watch.

Father wouldn’t allow him to join in such a messy activity anyways.

Soon enough, the cookies have been put in the oven and Marinette sets the timer for them. She takes the hat off her head, “There! All done! I told you that it wasn’t that complicated!”

“That’s ‘cause you actually knew what you were doing!” Claude exclaims, hugging her.

“I am still certain that without your presence Claude’s kitchen may not have survived this experience.” Felix stands to put his mug away and the others finally notice Adrien.

“Oh hey, Adrien. When’d ya’ get here?” Allan sits at the table with the blond.

He shrugs, ”A little bit ago. I didn’t want to interrupt.”

“You could have said something, if you want to join.” Marinette has yet to flip back to her normal state of mind. She’s channeling her Ladybug mindset for public situations.

“Father wouldn’t have wanted me to.”

At this, Marinette gets a defiant tone and her expression changes to yet another new one for all but Adrien, “Well y-” She cuts herself off abruptly, remembering herself and slouching slightly, “Well that’s unfortunate.”

“I think that you should do what you want. He’s not here to stop you.” Allegra sits as well.

“Last time I tried that we were chased through Paris by a mob of fans.” The others are confused, but before any of them can question further, Marinette drops her head to the table.

“Ugh. I still can’t believe I was in my pajamas that whole time. How did I forget to change into my clothes before leaving the house? Aaaaaah.”

Adrien snorts at that and Claude slams his hands onto the table (but gently), “Storytime?!”

“It was on the news…” Adrien supplies, wondering if that would jog their memories - if they’d seen it at all.

“Don’t remind meeee…” Allan pats Marinette consolingly. Her head is still on the table.

“It’d still be more fun to hear it from you guys.” Allegra leans forward excitedly.

Adrien shrugs, deciding to start with the news footage. He pulls it up on his phone and puts it in view of all of them. Marinette sits up to watch it, cringing every so often.

“Anyways that’s just the early stuff-”

“So not even all of it, you didn’t even see my brilliant disguises.” Marinette covers her face with her hands.

“It turned into an akuma attack eventually.”

“You got dropped off the side of a building…”

“He what?!” Allan interrupts them, “Were you okay?”

“You guys lead very eventful lives...” Allegra adds.

“Ladybug caught me. Also her cure would have fixed anything anyways.”

“Still.” Allan shakes his head. Marinette’s point goes unspoken. What if it didn’t fix everything? What will happen when she inevitably messes everything up and can’t reverse the damage? People shouldn’t trust Ladybug so much.

“I don’t think that our lives are that eventful…” Marinette tries to draw their attention away from Ladybug. It’s hypocritical, but as much she wishes they wouldn’t trust her hero alter-ego so much, she fears the day when everyone realizes how useless she really is.

Well, maybe useless is a strong word.

“The lives of spectacular people are always eventful! That’s what happens when you’re talented Mari!” Claude throws his arms in the air excitedly and she blushes.

“Well, if the heroes of Paris recognize ya’ by name your life has gotta’ be at least kinda’ interesting…” Allan chimes in.

Marinette shrugs noncommittally. She wouldn’t mind telling them those stories, but they involve her old classmates and to think about them too long would make her feel bad - which would be against the rules - one of the newer ones.

Rule #12: Don’t do anything that could attract an akuma to you.

She’d already messed that up earlier, but she hadn’t seen it coming. Alya showing up with Lila had been a surprise.

You should have realized that she would have shown up at an akuma attack you idiot.

To be fair though, Alya was only part of the problem, it was Lila’s presence that had really pushed her over the edge.

No. No excuses. The whole point of her rules is to have her accept these things as facts. If they’re facts, then she shouldn’t feel bad, thereby making her safe from akumas. She can’t just follow them whenever she pleases - that’s not how rules work. She’s been breaking the rules a lot recently, especially when she got sick. Maybe it would be for the best if she re-read them tonight. For the sake of reminding herself.

She’d memorized them, so she hadn’t read them in almost a week.

“What should we do while the cookies are in the oven? Board games?” Claude suggests.

“Sure!” Allegra clears the table to make room for whatever Claude drags out of his room. He brings a few different things out. It’s impressive just how many things he manages to carry at once.

“Okay! I got Jenga, Suspend, Sorry, Sleeping Queens, Dixit, Coup…”

“That’s a lot of games at once, Claude.” Allegra looks at him doubtfully, “Do you two even know how to play some of these?” She looks at Marinette and Adrien.

Marinette nods, but Adrien shakes his head.

“The only board game I’ve played is Monopoly. I hadn’t even played that until a few months ago…”

“Welp. Claude’s gonna’ introduce ya’ to all of his.”

“You bet I am!” He punctuates this statement by dropping everything at the end of the table.

Eventually the group settles into their games, and when the timer goes off, Marinette takes the cookies out to let them cool, turning the oven off before joining back into the game. They play a couple different games for a few hours, eating the cookies while they play. Marinette slips a couple in her purse for Tikki.

“These taste like friendship!” Claude declares.

“They’re pretty good.” Allegra says, then notices Adrien hasn’t had one yet, “Do you want one Adrien?”

“Well, uh,” he rubs the back of his neck, “Do you think I’m allowed to? Father…”

Before the rest of them can respond, Marinette hits her palms to the table, looking at Adrien intensely, whispering conspiratorially, “Rebel.”

The group laughs when Adrien eats a cookie quickly, seemingly having been entirely convinced by this.

Eventually it’s starting to grow dark outside, and it’s time for them to leave. Claude shows them out.

“Farewell, friends!” The other five smile, waving goodbye as they leave. Once they’re outside Marinette wraps her coat around herself tighter, hissing at the cold.

“You gonna’ be good ‘Nettie?” Allan cocks his head at her.

“M’ house isn’t that far.” The girl sticks close to the rest of them, which doesn’t seem like it would do much good. Her miraculous condition makes her extra sensitive to heat in the winter though, so for her it’s a little better - she can sense their body heat. It’s entirely unconscious, but she always can tell where a heat source is. It’s not super useful when she’s too tired to move, but at least it means she typically falls asleep on the warmest person.

“We’ll walk with you - just to be safe.” Allegra wraps an arm around the shorter girl’s shoulders, who leans into her.

They carry on their conversation as they walk, dropping off Marinette first. She goes straight to her bed, as does Tikki. Before Marinette can sleep, she forces herself to sit up, remembering her promise to reread the lists.

After she reads them she thinks that maybe it had been too long since she read them last, seeing as now she felt bad and that is the whole thing she’s trying to avoid.

She goes to sleep afterwards, because she’s still tired. She can think about the lists again in the morning.

---

Author’s Note: That definitely wasn't an excuse for her new friends to put her in charge of something while still allowing her to stay in her element. No,of course not. They're just helpless in the kitchen.

The recipe is here, if you're interested. I baked it with a friend a bit ago, and it was fun. They turned out pretty well, but I feel like a bakers' daughter such as Marinette would have adjustments to make.

Did I give Claude some of my own favorite games? Yes, yes I did.

Thanks for reading, and constructive criticism is welcomed in the comments below! The comments are my favorite part of this!

First | Previous | Saturday

#miraculous ladybug #transfer #with time #fanfic #chameleon salt #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #master fu #wayzz #tikki #quantic kids #allegra #allan #claude #ml felix #baking #cookies #miraculous tendencies #miraculous side effects

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neni-has-ascended · 5 years

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You Can(Not) UnGay Kaworu Nagisa - An Essay

This is a text-version of my video-essay on the recent Netflix/Evangelion translation controversy. To see the video version, please click here!

I make no secret of the fact that the linguistics involved in Anime and Game translation are one of my primary fields of interest as a Japanologist. Compared to translation between Germanic and Romanic Languages, as the west is used to it, translating from Japanese to English is filled with a plethora of pitfalls, the likes of which can be very difficult to imagine unless you’re fluent in both languages.

It’s because of this that my interest in any given AniManga controversy immediately skyrockets as soon as the matter of translation issues is brought up. Which brings us to June 21st’s release of Netflix’ Redub of Studio Gainax’ internationally infamous existential creator meltdown disguised as a Mecha Anime, Neon Genesis Evangelion.

1.) Neon Genesis ADVangelion

For those among you who haven’t yet heard of this inherently controversial work – what rock do you live under and does it still have vacancies? In all seriousness though, enough videos attempting to summarize the plot of NGE exist on the internet to make giving the rundown here an exercise in redundancy. All you need to know is that the protagonist’ name is Shinji and that he’s a mental-wreck with Daddy Issues who pilots a giant cyborg infused with the soul of his dead Mom to fight surrealist alien abominations and gains an increasingly screwed up social life doing so, all while his already fragile psyche gradually declines to world-ending consequences. For far less fatalistic takes on some of these concepts, please see RahXephon and Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. Good? Good. Let’s move on.

The original ADV Films dub of Neon Genesis Evangelion and its sequels and spin-offs is… not really flawless, to say the least, but it did a good job in introducing the series to a western audience while staying entirely true to the themes and intentions of the original version. This is definitely at least partially thanks to the fact that director and auteur of the series, Hideaki Anno, personally oversaw the translation and dubbing process, and while the guy in all honesty doesn’t really know the first thing about voice acting – his performance as Jiro in The Wind Rises is one of the reasons it’s my least favorite Ghibli movie – what he does understand is his own work, and what it should convey to the audience in order to be authentic to his vision. So while I do have my issues with the ADV dub, such as poor audio-quality and hopeless cases of overacting caused by poor voice direction in certain parts, the translated script of the series was as stellar as could be expected from something created with the original author’s input, and to the very end of the original 26 episodes run, one can definitely feel the deep, emotional investment every single member of the English cast had in these characters and their journey. (I mean. Just listen to Spike Spencer’s secret rant in the end of the last episode. The dude clearly cares about what happens to Shinji.) In any case, this is probably one of the most influential, iconic dubs to all of the English-speaking Anime Fandom.

Then Netflix decided to license NGE. Not the ADV Dub. Just the show.

People were not happy.

2.) The Rebuild of Netflixgelion

Please do not mistake what I’m saying for pedantic. The iconic nature of the original ADV dub of NGE cannot be understated, and plays a huge role in the current lack of acceptance for the Redub, even though previous similar redubbing efforts, such as in the case of Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon, where welcomed by the community wholeheartedly. The new dub cast is absolutely stellar, including voice acting veterans such as Carrie Keranen and Erica Lindbeck, and Casey Mongillo’s amazing vocal range goes a long way to replicate and convey the emotional depth of Shinji Ikari in a way previously only seen in Megumi Ogata’s original Japanese performance.However, while the Netflix dub has a wonderful cast and voice direction, what it does not have is the original dub’s Hideaki Anno-approved script.

…Aaaaand, this is where the real troubles start.

To be totally clear, the redub always meant trouble. The original voice cast were reportedly never given a real chance to reprise their roles- despite efforts made by the main trio, Spike Spencer, Amanda Winn Lee and Tifanny Grant to at least be given a chance to audition – which is a surefire recipe for upsetting a lot of fans. However, this is a problem that could have at least been partially smoothed over after allowing the performances of the new cast to shine in their own right. I mean, even if it is incredibly scummy to not even inform the old cast of the auditions for the redub, if the new version proves to contain superior performances and direction in comparison to the, honestly badly-aged ADV dub, then Netflix’s decision to make an entirely new dub is entirely understandable, right?

No such arguments can be applied to the retranslation of the show’s script.

3.) The End of Authorial Intent

I haven’t rewatched the entire show in the new dub, just two key episodes. That said, I wouldn’t dream of calling the new script ‘bad’. It’s, for the most part, natural and faithful to the original Japanese source text in much the same way the ADV dub was, to the point that some stray lines received identical translation in both versions. What gives the new script away as entirely unrelated to that of the ADV dub, however, are some rather… baffling localization choices.

All of those decisions are rooted in the original Japanese script. They’re not incorrect translations. If the Japanese were to be your only point of reference, there would be no reason to complain about these choices.

But we do have a point of reference. The ADV script. Which was overseen and approved by Hideaki Anno. The original director.

In the making of this video, I have since learned that Anno’s animation company, Khara, was most likely involved in the translation of the script for the Redub. However, as I can’t find any evidence that he himself was involved, the point I am about to make still stands:

Back in the 90s, very shortly after the show concluded its original run, Anno personally signed off on every single choice the ADV dub made. The respective pronunciations of Nerv, Seele and Gehirn, calling the EVA pilots by the correct singular “Child”, rather than the awkward Engrish singular “Children” the original Japanese featured, and referring to the enemies consistently as Angels, even in parts where the original Japanese mixed up the terminology for the sake of a pun with Kaworu’s name.

So, all of the ADV localization changes are within the intent of the original author. They are part of how the show is meant to be consumed by a western audience. Not carrying over this terminology, despite it being faithful to the Japanese script, thus ironically makes the Netflix script LESS faithful to Anno’s authorial intent than the ADV dub. But those are only terminology changes, right? They’re not a big deal. They don’t alter the context of the narrative itself.

…

Kaworu Nagisa.

4.) Kaworu Nagisa

Remember how I mentioned that I only really watched two episodes of the Netflix dub all the way through so far? Well, one of those two episodes happens to be one of the series’ most infamous, right after the two-part finale: Episode 24. “Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door”, or “The Final Messenger” – Let’s not get hung up on which it is, Evangelion has ALWAYS been weird with titles.

This Episode introduces Kaworu Nagisa, the fifth of the EVA pilots and long-time fangirl-favorite for not-so-subtle reasons. Kaworu appears as Shinji is at his lowest point, our main protagonist’s already pretty much non-existent self-esteem in shambles. The two boys bond immediately over… the fact that Kaworu can sing ‘Ode to Joy’? Yeah, let’s go with that – And the majority of the episode consists of showcasing the growing relationship between Kaworu and Shinji, beginning with simple conversations, but quickly progressing into some more… serious territory.

I won’t sugarcoat things, in terms of narrative structure, the episode is a mess, rushing from scene to scene with reckless abandon, attempting to successfully tell a story in under 25 minutes, that some Disney Movies don’t tell right in 90+ minutes. This is doubtlessly due to the overall mess that NGE’s production process had become at this point in its original run for reasons too complicated to talk about in this video, but let me assure you that there’s pretty solid evidence that Kaworu was definitely originally meant to appear for much more than a single episode. As it stands, however, he dies in the same episode he is introduced, begging Shinji to assist him in his suicide after revealing himself to him as the final Angel. His effect on Shinji, however, is profound and comparable to the effect Nia Teppelin of Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann has on that show’s protagonist, Simon Giha. In that way, just as with Nia later, it is plain as day that Kaworu is intended to be one of Shinji’s love interests. And the episode is NOT subtle at all in portraying him as such.

A lot can be said about the exact nature of Kaworu’s affection for Shinji, from Kaworu clearly seeing Shinji as some sort of avatar for humanity as a whole on which he projects his admiration for the species, to Shinji seemingly falling victim to an idealized Oedipus Complex in regards to his perception of Kaworu, the fact remains that their interactions with one another in Episode 24 are in places obviously romantic to even sexual in not only the dialogue, but also the visuals. Even with Hideaki Anno’s profession that Shinji’s romantic feelings for Kaworu aren’t “carnal”, they’re still obviously there. Projected and skewed by their unusual psyches as aspects of it may be, the relationship between them is clearly portrayed in a way that transcends the platonic and becomes intimate more quickly than your seafood friends can start singing ‘kiss the guy’ on a romantic boat ride – It’s not subtext, you guys. Towards Shinji Ikari, Kaworu Nagisa acts and speaks quite openly like one would speak to a lover. And even if Kaworu and his ambiguous humanity are somehow not gay enough for you, well, resident violently blushing and stuttering smitten wreck Shinji Ikari will put your doubts to rest. The visual homosexual (homoromantic?) tension in these scenes is so tangible, you can cut it with a knife. The dialogue, at certain points, doesn’t even really matter. Kaworu could quite literally be reading off the grocery list, and these scenes would STILL be gay.

That doesn’t mean the dialogue is not important, and that one shouldn’t really, really pay attention to what’s on screen when translating.

5.) The Final Angel is in the Detail

The translation of Kaworu’s words to Shinji in the Netflix dub is not wrong. But it ignores the context of the scene, as well as authorial intent. And that’s why I understand why people are angry at it.

The lines in question are these :

(Scene 1)

Kaworu: そう、好意に値することよ。

Shinji: 好意？

Kaworu:「好き」ってこと、さ

(Scene 2)

Shinji: カヲル君が「好きだ」って言ってくれたんだ。僕のこと。初めて…初めて人から「好きだ」って言われたんだ。

In the ADV dub, these lines were translated like this:

(Scene 1)

Kaworu: This is worth earning my empathy.

Shinji: Empathy?

Kaworu: I’m saying “I love you.”

(Scene 2)

Shinji: Kaworu said that he loved me. I’ve never... felt such kindness before.

In the Netflix dub, however, they were translated like this:

(Scene 1)

Kaworu: Yes, you’re worthy of my grace.

Shinji: Your grace?

Kaworu: I’m saying “I like you.”

(Scene 2)

Shinji: Kaworu said I was worthy of his grace. That was the first time... someone told me they liked me.

Which one of these is right? The fact is… both are.

The Japanese term “ 好き ” doesn’t really have a direct equivalent in English. It holds a connotation that is meant to convey very personal, but broadly defined affection. It doesn’t simply mean “to like something”. It means to feel a strong, positive, emotional connection to that person of thing. For that reason, this term can be used to profess affection to your friends, your family, your favorite item… Or as a love-confession.

In Japan, love-confessions using “ 好き ” are a lot, lot more common than the much, much stronger term “愛する”, let alone the implicitly sexual term “恋する”. In most romance Manga, “ 好き ” will be the term of choice the heroine uses to confess her love to her object of affection. And though, via character analysis, a strong argument can be made that when Kaworu uses “ 好き ” to express his affection for Shinji, he means general affection towards Shinji’s humanity more than personal, romantic affection, this is clearly not how Shinji takes Kaworu’s words. To Shinji, what Kaworu said in that moment, definitely sounded like a confession of romantic devotion, which becomes very, very clear when Shinji later tells Misato:

Shinji: 初めて人から「好きだ」って言われたんだ。

With the line being translates as “I like you”, this statement of Shinji sounds like pure delusion, which wouldn’t be out of character for him, of course, but isn’t at all what the episode is trying to get across. Of course people have told Shinji before they ‘like’ something about him! That’s a big part of the reason he started defining himself through his status as pilot of EVA Unit 01; his efforts earned him praise from those around him. He had friends for most of the series, at least implicitly, these people have definitely expressed a ‘liking’ for him. So by translating “好き” as “like” in this context, a whole layer of the statement is lost, and Shinji professing that this was the first time anybody has ever said that they “like” him sounds less like a serious revelation about his character, and more like his typical, delusional whining about how the world hates him.

And I think that’s why Anno signed off on the ADV dub translating the line as “I love you” rather than “I like you”. Because the point of this line is not Shinji thinking that Kaworu is the only person who’s ever tolerated his presence. It’s that Shinji feels like Kaworu was the first person to ever have a genuine, emotional connection to him. Something he’s never allowed himself to have, due to the series’ often cited theme of Hedgehog’s Dilemma.

And, as correct as translating “ 好き ” as “like” is, a whole dimension of Episode 24 of NGE is entirely lost if you choose to translate Kaworu’s lines that way. As much sense as it technically makes.

The Netflix dub of NGE, by all measures known to me, is a very well-acted, well-directed, well-translated version of a classic piece of Animation History. I am not telling anyone that it is in any way bad or even inferior to the original, and I am not telling anyone to avoid it.

All I am saying is, that if you, as a translator, have access to references regarding authorial intent you should probably use them.

#netflix evangelion #neon genesis evangelion #shin seiki evangerion #Kaworu Nagisa #Neni Talks #Neni Theory #Lost in Context

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imagine-loki · 5 years

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Mad Predictions

TITLE: Mad Predictions

CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 6

AUTHOR: inspired-snowflace

ORIGINAL IMAGINE: “A freedom restrained the sun shall invoke, The gift from the plea a mother spoke, Purpose shall be bestowed upon your life, In form of one you should have called wife, A lover presumed dead shall be back, Now shall you truly pay for your attack.”

Ever since the fortune teller had spilt these words, Loki’s life was thrown into a hurricane. He dared to hope that after the attack on New York and the following arrest, things would get better, but these words seemed to point in an opposite direction.

Things would never remain the same, for better or worse.

RATING: Everyone

NOTES/WARNINGS: Mild swearing. Updates earlier on my tumblr!!

RECAP : The reader comes to now of Loki’s attempt to exchange her for the soul stone, which results in her gaining the soul stone’s powers.

The rainbow lights crowded around you and lifted you. You didn’t notice the tears falling from your eyes until they left your cheeks to join the vastness of space. The mixed rainbow colours reflected your feelings inside. Sadness, Bitterness, Betrayed, Disgust and above all, ANGER. You wanted to get back on Loki for doing such a thing to you. Not being able to deal with concoction of emotions, you morphed them all into one strong feeling of hatred and anger. You landed back on Earth at the exact same place that you left. A huge circle, of what you assumed to be runes, glittered on the grass around you in a bright orange, as if making mock of your visit to Vormir.

The scar on your head burned and glowed as such powerful emotions surged through you. You saw Bruce and Thor come out at the sight of you. The worry lines on their faces dissipated and was replaced by relief. But your anger clouded the observant side of you and the display of such emotions went unnoticed.

“Oh, Thank God Y/N!!!! Where have you been?? You were gone for 6 hours now.” Bruce exclaimed.

6 hours? Had it been that long? Well, Thor had once told you that time functioned differently on varied planets. But as of this moment, It didn’t matter.

You turned to look at Bruce and he slightly winced under your hot gaze.

“Lady Y/N!!! You… you… you were Asgardian!!!” Thor was deep in thought while all the memories returned to him.

Not answering either’s remark, you proceeded to ask your own question, “WHERE. IS. HE?”

“Y/N, Who.. who are you talking about? Thor, Is she really Asgardian??” Banner remarked.

You angrily stormed forward causing the grass at your feet to wither and die away. Their smiles of relief faded away when they saw your glowering eyes. They didn’t oblige you with an answer since they knew that whosoever you were targeting was to be saved from your wrath. Otherwise, the second option was painful death.

“I will ask this only once- WHERE. IS. THAT. BASTARD?”

You saw Bruce whispering in his comm.

Something along the lines of- “Uhh… Guys I know we haven’t discussed the protocol of this but now would be a great time to discuss Code Orange. In the living room beside the garden. Over.”

Thor and Banner both exchanged looks before jumping forward to restrain you.

Even with those guys clutching an arm each of yours, you waddled towards the door of the living room. All the while you screamed obscenities that if they were written, the rating would have to be changed to mature. And all the while Bruce and Thor tried to fruitlessly tell you stuff to calm you down. As you opened the door, you saw Tony climb down the stairs in full armour.

“Banner! What the hell is Code Orange? Damn! it is too difficult to take the stairs in full armour.” He screamed.

He paused when he saw you. Then after glancing at your captors, he said “Ohh… JARVIS ? Can you please retract the suit.”

This gesture calmed you down a bit.

“Where the hell is he? Call him and I shall spare you all!!” You screamed, not wanting to lessen your anger at all. But your tears betrayed you, searing your cheeks and falling to the floor. Steve, Nat and Hawkeye came down together in complete battle armour, ready to lunge at their target. They all seemed confused about seeing you restrained and crying.

“Ummm… What just happened?” Hawkeye asked Bruce while sharing an unsure glance at Steve. You were further enraged upon seeing Wanda levitate down, a burst of magic in both hands. For that meant that the only one remaining to appear was Loki.

“Come down you bastard!!! Fight me head on!!! You dare spit on the name of love!! Come down, you damned liar!!!Stop playing cowardice and face your death!!!” you screamed towards the stairs.

“Language.” Steve instructed.

“Oh Steve!! Good you weren’t here earlier. You would have almost dragged your holy ass to hell of you would have heard her loud words.” Tony said and was subject to a typical ‘shut up’ look by Steve.

“Y/N came back from Asgard. Thor says she is Asgardian. Umm… Not sure why she is hell-bent on murder though.” Bruce croaked what he could while holding you restrained.

“Who is the subject of her wrath?” Natasha enquired.

“Loki!! He and Y/N were courting.” Thor said with his eyebrows furrowed as if recollecting your past.

“Ok cool. So why don’t we let Y/N go? I would love to see Y/N punch him in his royal smug face. Media asks-we say ‘oops’. Two- Y/N, bad choice in men. Three- how about you take some anger management classes with Bruce? We cool now? Lets go grab some shawarma.” Tony said.

All of them had closed in on you from all sides. As your anger subsided, they stood around you in a circle. Just as things were about to get better, they hit a new worst. Loki entered.

He strolled into the like he owned the tower. This rekindled your fire of rage. You made an attempt to break free. This sudden move caught the avengers off guard. By the time he stood in front of you , you managed to free your hand. You raised it and turned it slowly, painfully slowly, counter clockwise, causing immense pain to surge through his body. He fell to his knees, screaming from the pain.

“How does that feel huh?? Feels good right?? Now fight me head on!! I will show you why you shouldn’t have messed with me!!!” You screamed, the tears flowing like tap leaks.

When the avengers recovered from their initial shock, they pulled your hand down causing the pain to stop. Yet he stated on his knees. Seeing him like that caused you to weaken. Now you were a bully, just like Thor and his friends, who never bothered to know the reason due to which he did things.

“Let me go.” You said sobbing heavier than before.

Sensing your weakness, the avengers let go. Your knees buckled under you and you mirrored his stance.

You wiped your tears away in an attempt to appear brave. You calmed your voice before speaking.

“Loki. I am willing to forgive you….” His eyes shot upwards in utter disbelief. Tears rained down them.

“Just answer one thing- WHY?” Your voice collapsed and you began to sob again. He continued to sob but didn’t oblige you with an answer.

“This is exactly what it is like when you miss the first fifteen minutes of the movie. You don’t understand the entire movie.” Tony muttered. You looked at him. One look at your face and his funny side disappeared.

“Ok… Listen up, Reindeer games. Since you are especially bad at understanding feelings, Let me tell you this- She is giving you a second chance. Answer her question, and chances are, she might forgive you.”

Loki made no move to explain. He just closed his eyes, faced heaven and muttered, “Oh Valhalla! Please forgive me.”

“Fine!! Then I shall explain!!” you said while sobbing all over again.

“I hail from Asgard. I was the daughter of a noble there. I was smart and got to take part in the royal meetings with my father. There I met him…” You said signalling with your chin at Loki. “We fell in love and started courting, or as we put it, dating. Then, he fell off the bifrost and people assumed he died. I wept and mourned over him EVERY SINGLE DAY. One day, he returned back and I was so happy! He told me to keep it a secret, but I was so happy to see him that I didn’t care! He stayed with me for eighteen days. He then took me to Vormir, where the soul stone lied. The stone requires a sacrifice of someone you love, by throwing them down a cliff. And then….” You touched the scar at the back of your head unable to spell it out. You heard Loki’s sobs getting stronger.

You let out a sarcastic laugh. “But he forgot that you are supposed to love the person you throw off the cliff and not the other way around.”

“But y’know some stones are kinder than some humans, or rather gods.” You said spitefully, your anger bubbling up as the main emotion again.

“The soul stone chose to revive me, gave me powers, wipe my memories and send me here. The rest… well you know…. is history.”

Steve lifted you up fragilely as if any moment you would break. Nobody made an attempt to lift Loki, not even Thor, who usually went soft on him. A glance was all that you needed to see that the avengers were staring daggers at Loki. You were pretty sure if their eyes could shoot lasers, Loki would have already died.

“Y/N, let’s go.” Steve said, leading you away from Loki. “Avengers, come along.” Steve said looking over his shoulder.

“Captain. You haven’t given your decision yet. Is he to be killed by a gun to the head or perhaps, be thrown off the tower.” Natasha said venomously.

“Your guns won’t harm him. My hammer will work. Unless, the lady wants to choose your latter option.” Thor said aggressively.

You couldn’t see Loki’s expression but you were pretty sure he would have felt hurt at Thor’s words. Loki had told you he loved Thor.

But he even told you he loved you, didn’t he?

“Let him be. I don’t care anymore. Besides, I heard that you bought Burger King, Tony. I think a celebration is due.” You said trying your best to change the mood along with the subject. Tony took the cue.

“Oh yes!! Guys let’s celebrate the acquisition of Burger King!!!! Y/N, and if you ask nicely I might even give you the recipe of the secret sauce.” Tony said trying to lighten the mood.

“Yes, man of Iron, tell us the recipe of the secret potion!!!!” Thor joined in.

You grinned and looked back at Thor. Your true intention was, however, to have a glance at Loki. He looked at your group with tears continuously streaming down his eyes, shock written all over his face.

“You guys and Burger King’s special sauce. Thank Gosh you bought Burger King, Tony, because they made half of their profits from you guys. ” Natasha said while rolling her eyes but with a playful smile on her face.

“Off to Burger King then!!!” Tony screamed.

“Wait!” You said. You slowly turned towards Tony to build the suspense. “Did you just climb down the stairs when you could have easily flown down with your suit?” You asked while raising an eyebrow just for extra effect. Though with your red eyes and sob lines, you were pretty sure it hadn’t worked. You didn’t want everyone to pity on you, so you decided to be strong.

“Dammit kid! I hate it when you are smarter than me!” Tony said, though his grin betrayed his words.

“Does that mean that you hate it the moment me and you are in the same room?” You quipped. The laughter of your friends echoed, shooing the bad feelings away.

#Loki #Lover #Angst #God of Mischief #Others #Submitted fic #submission #mad predictions #chapter 6 #inspired-snowflace

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userseokkie · 5 years

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so uh i know literally no one except like two people care about this but i was thinking today about steve and tony as one does, and if you’re not aware i have a tag for them i call #red oni blue oni and in case you don’t know what that refers to here’s the explanation from tv tropes:

“This trope is about two individuals (or occasionally, factions or civilizations) that are significantly linked together somehow (such as through a rivalry, friendship, being siblings, co-workers, competitors, etc.) that have differing personalities and, with it, often different approaches to the world in general, especially whatever they might be competing in/for/over. This, of course, gives them something to butt heads about, since their manner of acting may rub each other the wrong way and each is sure that their way of doing things is right.”

which you know, OBVIOUSLY steve and tony fit that trope because if anything they’re the driving forces for every major event that’s happened with the avengers since they found cap in 1964. but ALSO there’s more

even though with the red and blue thing you associate Steve with the blue oni and Tony with the red oni, it appears as though they’re the exact reversed:

“The Red Oni is associated with passion, wildness, and defiance. A Red Oni character is often more brawny than brainy, extroverted, enthusiastic, determined, and filled with a zest for life. They are also much more likely to break conventions and rules than their counterpart. If a Red Oni is indeed noticeably intelligent, they will still be much more wild and impetuous than the Blue Oni and/or with less sophisticated thoughts, feelings, or goals. Generally speaking, they're more people-oriented than goal-oriented (although both Oni's can be either). They may or may not shrug off criticism about themselves or their aims and goals, but say or do something nasty to their closest friends and you've just guaranteed yourself a world of pain.” Now i’m not saying Steve is a Big Dumb Blond but the defiant, loud mouthed kid from brooklyn that never took no for an answer is really something that rings true with this description.

“The Blue Oni is associated with serenity, control and observing authority. A Blue Oni is more intellectual, proud, traditional, introverted, and cultured (sometimes more spiritual, although that's not guaranteed). Blue Oni personalities are often respected by others, but also likely to puzzle or confound their peers because they are difficult to read and have a mysterious quality to them. It's worth noting that while blue types appear tremendously calm and composed, sometimes, this is just the surface, and scratching that façade may show that they are, if anything, wound far too tight beneath their calm and unemotional appearance.” lmao okay so.... traditional? introverted? stoic? those are all descriptors you would NEVER apply to Tony Stark. but then again, if we separate Tony the outside image he’s so carefully crafted from the real Tony who almost no one gets to see, then perhaps it’s more accurate. we know Tony is an alcoholic with a depressive streak and it’s dangerously easy fro him to slip into self destructive habits precisely because he does NOT communicate. he’s great at deflecting - try talking to him about his feelings and he’ll get ragingly drunk and blow up his house only to avoid answering. so... blue?

i still have my hang ups with dividing them so neatly as Red and Blue when it’s more like a swirl of colors where it ends up a purple shade bc they both have things from each Oni. but here is where it gets more interesting and what makes me say OH MY GOD YES THEY’RE THE EMBODIMENT OF THIS TROPE:

“While many expressions of this trope play it straight, it is also not uncommon for the Blue Oni and Red Oni to mix traits. The Red Oni, while usually the more passionate and emotion-driven, may also be the more easy-going and flexible of the two. Their more simplistic world-view may make them at least partially immune to angst and Wangst. Conversely, the Blue Oni, while usually stoic and thoughtful, may hide a volatile, angsty nature that may erupt if pushed too far. In such instances the two may switch roles (...)

There are a lot of ways to play their interactions, so sometimes the two are both leads on an equal standing, sometimes the blue is more of The Smart Guy or The Lancer to the red's Hot Blooded The Leader or The Big Guy. The relationship can also vary wildly, as they are just as likely to be close friends as they are to be bitter rivals or enemies. One thing that is sure is that regardless of how big a cast is, when these two are in it, they will be magnetically drawn to each other.“

See?! the Red oni/Blue oni trope is not so much about them being complete opposites, night and day, black and white, it’s more about how their differences bring them together but their similarities is what keeps them that way. jfc Steve and tony are literally two sides of the same coin, where that coin is justice and heroism and Steve is a deontological representation of what a hero is, while Tony is more a pragmatic/utilitarian reflection of a hero. They are both philosophical movements that focus on Good and achieving what’s right but in far different ways.

Even further developing their portrayal, it’s obvious they borrow from both onis interchangeably:

“In a show where it's relevant, differences in fighting style may be something like Technician vs. Performer. For example, a red may rush headlong into combat without focus or a plan, relying on surprise or intimidation. It may be that their strategy is to close the fight quickly before their opponent can think or adapt. (”Stark, we need a plan of attack!” “I have a plan - ATTACK!”) The blue may use cunning traps, stealth and strategies, or tend to win in elegant Single-Stroke Battle fashion, or rely on hitting a target with magical powers or projectiles from a distance instead of running up to their opponent and punching them in the face. (Now, does this sound more like Steve or like Tony? because to me this is Tony’s battle strategy to a T. he never punches someone in the face, well besides a few exceptions. He literally has projectiles with body heat targeting. so is tony the blue one or the red one?) Force and Finesse is a variation where red tends to rely on raw power while blue uses precision strikes.“ (Steve rogers is a brilliant strategist, and reminds everyone all the time that he’s the Man with a Plan and everyone always defers to him on the battlefield. But then again, he’s also the kid who used to weigh 90 pounds soaking wet and still went round for round with bullies twice his size without thinking about it. “I can do this all day” says the punk as he throws punches blind. that’s a Red oni thing, but he’s strategy overall is more Blue oni.)

Even so, something else that’s been established time and time again is the difference in their fighting styles. Steve is a boxer, which ultimately means offensive fighting, while Tony practices kung fu and mixed martial arts, which translates into defensive fighting. BUT THEN WAIT, there’s also the fact that Steve has a goddamn shield, which is meant to defend against attacks, while Tony has a weaponized suit of armor that flies, which can be either of both things but is normally used more for offensive attacks, unless you just wanna fly away or bring up the nanotech shield you took from Steve’s book, Tony.

The trope says that Red does everything impulsively, without plan, relying on his instinct while Blue makes a plan and trains to do all perfectly. That’s Tony being the red oni and Steve being the Blue oni. But then, there’s also the brawn vs. brains dichotomy where “Red would focus on becoming physically superior often by putting his/her body through an insane amount of intense training which can be dangerous at times” which is Steve. And meanwhile “Blue would focus on getting smarter and gathering all possible knowledge, betting on their intelligence to win them the fight” which is definitely Tony. So then again, it’s all a mixture where they’re both Onis and yet they both complement the other one where they’re lacking.

In conclusion Steve Rogers and Tony Stark are kindred spirits and also Red and Blue Onis and I love them a lot but not as much as they love each other

#idk where I was going w this but fuck it #stevetony #stony #marvel #marvel meta #steve rogers #Tony stark #red oni blue oni #superhusbands

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wendyeve24 · 5 years

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QUEEN OF ROSES- Prologue- Queen: A Night at the Wedding Hotel

Author’s note: This is my first ever fanfic posting on tumblr, so please be gentle uwu

Warnings: Smut and lots of it! This is an au that has elements based on real events (but that occurs later on in the series. Keep in mind this is the prologue.) The story is set in 1977 and progresses through the rest of the years in the other parts. Also the “oc’s” in this fic (Marina, Elizabeth, Dove, Taylor) are real celebrities. The series is pretty long. As a side note: I am in no way erasing Freddie’s bisexuality/homosexuality with this fic. This is purely for fun and I hope you enjoy reading it, I worked long and hard on this series and debated even releasing it. Thank you, and I hope you enjoy.

PS: I’m sorry if it comes out as a big wall of text, I don’t know how to edit fics on tumblr.

It was 1977 and the band Queen had to take a short break from their News Of The World Tour. A rather important event for all four members of the band came up. Coincidentally an all female English rock group that was just as famous as Queen at that time had to take a break from touring as well... The Roses they were called were on hiatus, the female rock group was getting married... to the members of Queen... all on the same exact day. The priest wasn’t as pleased about seeing the four couples at the altar all tying the knot. The weddings were in Staffordshire, England and were private affairs. The equally as flamboyant front-woman for The Roses, Marina had a long flowing wedding dress on that poofed out at the bottom with ruffles. She locked arms with Freddie Mercury, her soon to be husband. His neck length black hair combed and his satin white suit with the purple innings adorning his slim form. Freddie had met Marina at a pub with the rest of Queen after a gig and it was love at first sight. She was just as flamboyant on stage as he was and just as shy and quiet off stage like him. They were a match made in Heaven. Freddie had told her about his previous relationship with a woman... and his sexuality. Marina wasn’t surprised... no straight man she knew would willingly dress up in women’s clothes unless it was for a good reason. Marina accepted him nonetheless and his being open with her only made her fall for him more. The proposal was at the flat that the members of Queen shared. Marina had come over to share a new song with Freddie and ended up not only getting praise for her song but a marriage proposal with a huge wedding ring. Marina and Freddie were all smiles in the small Staffordshire Church that Saturday morning. Their relationship had been nothing but fluffy feelings and happiness with a bit of flair mixed in. Roger Taylor and Dove’s relationship had been a different story though. The two of them were so much alike it was scary. Both were blonde, pretty and promiscuous. Roger unfortunately was more promiscuous than his soon to be wife. Roger’s ex girlfriend applauded Dove for taming the wild blonde drummer and having him settle down. Roger was a known player, and had different chicks on his arm almost every night. After meeting Dove at the pub (who had played hard to get from the beginning) Roger knew he had to have her. Thus, began their complex relationship with Roger being fed up with Dove sometimes and vice versa. Roger soon tried to straighten up and fly right when he realized what a catch the female drummer was and soon proposed to her outside of a studio in the Fall of 1976. She had looked down at him in shock for the longest time when it happened, prompting a snarky comment from him on how his knee was getting numb and that he couldn’t stay down in that position forever. He was answered with an “Oh shut up Roger!” and a resounding “yes” to his proposal. She was currently leaning against Roger as the vows were being read. Brian and Elizabeth aka Lana, took some time to get to know each other better before tying the knot. It turned out that they were both serious nerds when it came to the cosmos and subjects related to it. They were both evenly matched on the intelligence scale and both played well on the guitar. Lana read more books than Brian though, but he didn’t mind... that only made him love her more. He had proposed under the night sky under the stars in a field near the flat Queen shared. A cool night breeze blew as they laid in the grass looking at the stars. Brian felt sick before he proposed... he was so nervous about it he didn’t think she would say yes after he got down on one knee after getting her attention by tapping her shoulder, her brown-auburn hair blowing gently before she smiled at him with tears almost flowing out of her eyes in pure joy at the sight of him asking for her hand in marriage. She nodded and hugged him, before he put the ring on her finger. John and Taylor were both quiet as they stood next to the other three couples at the altar... but then again when were they not quiet? Taylor was the bassist of The Roses and was the youngest member. She was in her early 20s. Taylor was usually quiet like John was but the difference between them was that Taylor was really funny. She could make a whole room laugh without trying. John immediately liked her when he met her at the same pub the rest of the guys met their ladies at. He proposed to her in the studio after a recording session. She said yes and hugged him only for Freddie to stop their celebration to get his camera to capture the moment. All four couples were ecstatic to be getting married.

“You all may kiss your brides.” The priest said as he watched four veils get lifted and the couples kissing. Freddie dipped Marina and kissed her deeply. The priest hadn’t the slightest idea on how the woman could kiss a man with teeth like those. Roger and Dove almost looked as if they were starting their wedding night by the looks of it, their kiss was deep and passionate while Roger snaked his hand to the back of her head to pull her into the kiss. The priest shook his head in disgust at Roger and Dove. This was a church for goodness sake, he could at least have a bit more class. Brian and Lana were both blushing during their kiss, the priest found that to be quite adorable but he was still confused as to why Brian insisted on looking like a poodle with his hairstyle. The priest rolled his eyes as he looked at John and Taylor. They had grabbed each other’s faces during their kiss. The priest frowned, what the bloody hell was wrong with kids these days? The couples had finally come up for air and walked back down the aisle in a row as their families cheered them on. Freddie’s mother started to cry, for she was so happy for her son. Everyone went outside to the limousines that were parked at the front of the church and the guests threw rice for the happy couples as they got into their own limos. Everyone was off to the reception. “Ugh my feet are already killing me.” Marina said as she took her heels off in the limo. “Well, the first duty I’ll do as your husband is rub your aching feet darling.” Freddie said with a smirk as Marina kissed his cheek and put her feet in his lap. “Thank you dear.” She replied with a giggle. In the next limo, Roger and Dove were heavily making out. Dove pulled away momentarily to catch her breath. Roger leaned back in for another round of lip locking and Dove put a finger to his lips. “Let’s save the rest for the wedding night and honeymoon, yeah?” She said breathlessly. “Yeah you’re right. I don’t know how much longer I can wait though. I want to see you... all of you.” He said softly as he started trailing kisses along her neck. “Rog! Stop it! Please... I wanna wait until tonight.” She whimpered out. “Fine. I’m still gonna kiss you though.” “Of course, Mr. Taylor.” She said as she turned her face back towards him and smiled before he continued their make out session. Brian and Lana were all smiles in their limo. “Gosh Bri, I love my name now, Elizabeth May. It has a ring to it.” “It sure does. But I do like Mrs. May better though.” “I like it too. So, how much wedding cake are you going to eat?” “Not much, but enough... that is if the rest of the guys don’t get to it first.” Brian teased. “Oh I’m sure they won’t. The girls will probably tear the cake apart though, Marina, Taylor and Dove have huge sweet tooths.” “Really? Well if the cake gets eaten then I’m sure there’s gonna be lots of wedding cookies.” “Those sound delicious! Sweetheart can we stop talking about food? I’m getting hungry.” “Anything you say princess.” “Oh shush.” Lana said as she kissed him, he smiled and kissed back. John and Taylor were in their limo laughing it up at a joke she had just told. “There’s so much rice in my shoes.” Taylor said as she shook her shoe a bit to get the rice out. “Here let me help.” John said with a slight smile as he helped her get the rice out of her shoes. “You know, rice throwing means fertility within a marriage. Just because I’m kicking rice out of my shoes doesn’t mean we won’t have children, John.” She joked. “Haha! I know. Um... Taylor?” “Yes?” “I know we were both extremely busy and couldn’t really speak on it at the time... but, how many children do you want?” He asked nervously as he handed her shoe back to her. She blinked in deep thought and smiled at him, caressing his face after she put her shoe back on. “However many you want. If you want a whole village we can have a village. The sky is the limit after all. I’ve always wanted kids of my own one day and now since we’re married... it’s only natural to talk about these things.” She said as she looked at him lovingly. “Yeah... it is. I don’t want a village though, I don’t want to put you through all of that... but I do want a lot of kids.” John said with a smile. “We can talk more about it on our honeymoon, how about that?” Taylor offered. “That sounds great.” He said as he kissed her.

The couples and their guests soon arrived at the reception which was held at a garden in Staffordshire that was a couple of miles away. The hotel that Freddie had chosen for himself and his wife was down the street from the garden. Though the guys had chosen their own hotels none of them realized that they had all accidentally chosen the same hotel for their wedding nights. But they would soon find out.

“Congrats to all four of you dashing couples! Now, let’s have the first dance!” Tim Staffel said as he took the mic. He was a member of Smile before it was called Queen. After he left the band, Freddie and John replaced him. He was still good friends with Brian though. “I still don’t understand why we couldn’t make ‘I’m In Love With My Car’ the song for the first dance.” Roger complained as he walked to the middle of the garden with Dove and the other couples. “We’re not having our first dance as husband and wife to your car song Roger!” Dove answered as she rolled her eyes. “It’s a bloody good song!” Tim Staffel and his band played a slower, more romantic version of ‘Doing Alright’ as the first song. Freddie held Marina close as they danced. She heard him humming in her ear as they danced. “You’re not even singing and you sound good.” Marina whispered to him. “Oh I always sound good, darling... actually I sound bloody great.” He whispered back. “Freddie Mercury, you are quite the character.” “And you are as well my darling. I love you, Mrs. Mercury.” “And I love you, Mr. Mercury.” “I thought you usually didn’t dance?” Lana asked her husband teasingly. “I don’t. But this is a happy occasion so... why not?” Brian grinned as he dipped Lana. Lana laughed after he dipped her and held onto him as they did an awkward two step due to how tall Brian was. “Dancing with you is like dancing on a cloud.” Taylor said softly into John’s ear. “Really? Well dancing with you is like dancing in the air.” John replied with a smile. “This song is so slow... but I have to say I’m enjoying it.” Roger said. “Good to know you’re enjoying something today.” Dove whispered. “Oh shut up, I’m enjoying you aren’t I? Even if it doesn’t seem like I’m enjoying you for whatever reason... there’s always tonight for me to enjoy you.” Roger said huskily into her ear. “Oh piss off Mr. Taylor.” Dove answered teasingly. The song ended and soon the families danced with the couples. After the first few dances, and a couple of funny and embarrassing stories had been passed around along with a huge quantity of alcohol, it was time to eat. “Oh mum made the spicy sausages! Try some everyone! Don’t be shy! There’s salad, pasta and pizza for Lana and Brian though.” Freddie called as he sipped some champagne and sat down with his wife to eat. “Oh for fucks sake! We’re not rabbits Fred!” Brian called out from the other end of the table. “Oh you both will be rabbits, just you wait until tonight!” Marina called back, which made the table erupt with laughter. Lana blushed and Brian rolled his eyes. “Real mature Marina!” Dove teased after eating a slice of pizza. “Says the one who insisted on fighting me over the bouquet at my sister’s wedding!” Taylor said teasingly. “Oh come off it!” Dove said as she sipped her champagne. “Really, everyone she’s not that mature at all... I mean she married Roger of all people!” Freddie announced. “What the bloody hell are you saying Fred? I’m one of the most mature men you know!” Roger answered before stuffing some sausage in his mouth. “How do you call hiding in a cupboard for hours just to get your song about having sex with your car on the album mature in any way?” John asked. “It’s a strong song and like I told Brian, the whole song is a bloody metaphor!” Roger yelled. “That song made me want to bash my head on my piano for goodness sake!” Freddie said. “You’ve done that before, Fred! You were so drunk one time we had to change your own clothes for you and then when you got on stage you couldn’t halfway sing Bohemian Rhapsody correctly and then you bashed your head on the piano. You’re lucky you didn’t get brain damage you wanker.” Brian said as he pointed at Freddie. “I had a little too much to drink that day... sorry darling.” Freddie said with a slight smirk and a shrug. “Can we eat cake now?” Lana asked in order to change the subject. “Oh sure why not! Oh Miami darling! The cake please!” Freddie called out to Queen’s manager on the far side of the room who was drinking the last bit of his champagne. “Of course Fred.” He brought the cake over and watched as Freddie got a knife preparing to cut the cake. “To new memories with your significant others, I wish you all -myself and Marina included- a very wonderful, blissful lasting marriage full of love, trust, happiness and lots and lots of good sex... and if you’re feeling especially cheeky lots and lots of babies! Now, my darlings I shall cut this beautiful confection and then in the words of Marie Antoinette, let them eat cake!” Freddie said cheerfully with a huge smile on his face as he started to cut the cake. “Just serve the damn cake already!” Lana yelled impatiently. “Patience my darlings.” Freddie said. The cake was soon cut and everyone had a slice of cake. Freddie and Marina started to feed each other. A bit of frosting got onto Marina’s lips and Freddie cheekily licked it off. In the back near the garden entrance, Paul Prenter stood there watching Freddie and Marina. He growled out of frustration and sulked. He then left in a huff and decided to go and party it up at a gay bar instead. Miami stood in the corner, watching Paul leave. “Good riddance.” He muttered under his breath as he sipped some more champagne he had gotten and went back to the party to mingle with the other wedding guests. It was nighttime now, and the drinking, eating and dancing was starting to slow down. “Brian, it’s getting late now.” Lana said as she hugged him. “Is it now? Well Mrs. May, where would you like to go at this hour?” He asked with a slight smirk. “Take me to the hotel, my tall and strong man.” Lana said in a low voice. Brian groaned in slight arousal as he heard her speak. He loved it when she spoke in a low voice. “Of course my lady.” He said with a bow as he picked her up and carried her bridal style. “Well goodnight everyone! We’re going to head to the hotel.” Brian announced. “We are too!” Roger said with Dove in his arms. “We’re right behind you.” John replied as he carried Taylor. “So are we darling.” Freddie said. Everyone said goodnight to each other and the men immediately went to the limos, put their significant others in and told the driver to step on it.

“I wonder why they’re still behind us?” Roger asked Dove as he looked out of the window of the limo before getting out after it stopped in front of the hotel. “Oi! Aren’t you blokes at the wrong hotel!?” He yelled. “Darling you must be drunk, I booked this hotel months ago.” Freddie replied as he emerged from his limo with Marina in tow. “Same here.” Brian replied. “So did I.” John added. “Fuck! This is just great! Please tell me you all didn’t get rooms next to me?” Roger complained. But, unfortunately Roger spoke too soon. After the elevator ride up to their rooms he discovered that they were all rooming next to each other for their wedding nights. What kind of sick joke was this?

{CAUTION: Smut ahead. If you are below 18 please DO NOT proceed!}

“Well this is great. We get a chance to hear Roger and his bird go at it tonight while we consummate our marriage, darling.” Freddie said bitterly. He was none too pleased about the arrangements. “Freddie... honey, it’s alright. You know... we could be even louder than them. They’re not going to ruin our night. We can’t let them.” Marina said with a determined look on her face. “Oh darling... I love this side of you so much. Let’s make some music together, my sweet.” Freddie said as he kissed her. She started to work his suit jacket off of him and he unbuttoned his shirt and took off his pants and shoes, leaving himself in his white man thong. “Oh my god! Fred! You wear thongs!?” “Yes for tonight... or I might wear them more than you think I do... that’s for you to find out.” He said cheekily with a wink as he laid down on the bed. Marina tapped his leg with her hand as she pointed at her dress. “Get me out of this death trap before you get too comfortable.” She teased. He helped her out of the dress and looked at her body as the dress slipped off of her. She wore white lingerie that fit around her curves. Freddie had never seen a more beautiful curvier woman than her. “Baby you’re beautiful.” He said as he gently led her back to the bed and pulled her down on top of him and kissed her deeply. She straddled him and ran her hand up his hairy chest. The kiss was soon broken as they looked each other in the eyes. “I wanna get down tonight... so make sure you don’t tease me.” Freddie said, a dominant look appearing in his eyes as he ran his thumb along her lower lip. She nodded wordlessly before he got on top and took her bra off. “Your tits are wonderful.” He said with a smirk as he took a nipple into his mouth and heard Marina moan. While Freddie got down and ready, Roger and Dove were strangely enough not doing much. “Roger! Please, I need you!” Dove begged. “I’ve wanted to do this all day and now since we’re finally here... I don’t feel like it and you do!? Fuck me...” Roger said as he sat on the edge of the bed. “I want you to but you’re not in the mood.” “Shit... you know, it might be because we’re next door to our bandmates!” He said, obviously annoyed. “Look, how about we start and if you’re still not feeling up to it... then we’ll stop.” Dove offered. “Alright. Sit in my lap.” He said. Dove did as she was told and Roger started to kiss her neck, her perfume was intoxicating and the scent of it was starting to drive him wild. “Dove your perfume... what’s it called?” “Love potion. Why?” Then without warning, Roger almost tore her dress open and jumped on her, going mad on her neck and kneading her clothed breasts. “Oh Rog! Roger!” She cried out in surprise and arousal. “They’re already loud... just like I expected.” Brian muttered to himself. Lana went to change in the bathroom and came out in lingerie. “Hello Mr. May.” Lana said seductively as she emerged from the bathroom. Brian’s eyes nearly popped out of his skull when he saw her. “Oh dear Jesus... Mrs. May. You look absolutely ravishing.” He said. He was completely breathless when he saw her. “I’m glad you think so, honey.” She replied as she laid down on her back on the bed next to him. “Please rock my world Brian.” She pleaded softly as she looked up at him lovingly. “Of course baby... of course I will.” He leaned down and kissed her deeply as he worked his pants and shirt off. “You’re nervous aren’t you?” John asked Taylor as she hugged her arms up to her chest shortly after John carried her over the threshold. “Yeah... I’m kinda nervous.” She said as she looked at him. “Come here. There’s nothing to be nervous about. I’ll go slow with everything and I’ll be gentle... unless you don’t want to do anything tonight?” “I want to! I... really want to. It’s just... the girls always talked about sex and honestly they kinda made me fear it since I’m still a virgin. Marina always said it hurts the first time... is that true?” Taylor looked at her newlywed husband. “I heard it does for women but I also heard that the more you do it, the less it hurts.” John answered. “Lana told me that too. John I’m scared...” Taylor trailed off with her sentence a bit. “Honey, there’s nothing to be afraid of with this. Look, you said you want a village of kids? Well this is one way on how to make that dream a reality. We’re not making babies tonight but instead we’ll be making love. Taylor, I need you to trust me on this.” Taylor blushed and nodded at what he had to say. “I trust you John.” She answered as she walked over to him and kissed him. During the kiss John loosened the back of her dress. After the kiss was broken, Taylor dropped her dress, revealing her white underwear to him. “You’re beautiful.” John said with a huge grin. “Thank you. So... what should we do first?” “Get on the bed, I’ll take the lead.” John replied as Taylor crawled onto the hotel room bed. John stripped down, only in his boxers now. He got on the bed and looked at Taylor. “Turn around so I can take your bra off.” He said softly. “Okay...” Taylor turned her back to him and he unclasped her bra. She slid it down and John finally saw her breasts. “A-Are they big enough? I know I don’t have the biggest-“ “They’re beautiful.” John said as he looked at her with nothing but pure love in his eyes. “May I?” He asked gently. “Yes.” Taylor nodded before gasping at the sudden feeling of his tongue on her nipples.

“Oh! Fred! Gosh yes! Ooh you told me not to tease you but here you are teasing me! Freddie I want more...” Marina whimpered as she looked at him. “I know what you want darling but I want to have a bit of fun... I won’t give it to you just yet though. Come over here and blow me before I reward you for being such a good girl.” Freddie dirty talked. Marina squealed in delight at what he had said. She was getting tired of the breast play. His thong slipped off easily and he was definitely at attention. “So fucking huge... how in the world is that gonna fit in me?” Marina said before she started licking it. “Mmm, It’ll fit dear... don’t worry. Ah... such a naughty girl.” Freddie said, his eyes closed along with a groan emitting from his throat as he threw his head back and completely welcomed the feeling of his new wife sucking him off. Meanwhile, Roger and Dove were getting steamier by the second. “Roger! What has gotten into you!? You’re like an animal! Oh Rog! Please!” Dove cried out as Roger’s head went between her legs. “Spread them.” He commanded. “I am spreading them!” “Go wider!” “This is as wide as they can go! If I spread them anymore I’ll break!” “Good. Maybe that’ll teach you a lesson about teasing me.” He said darkly. “What the bloody hell? What has gotten into you- Ah!” He spread her legs apart for her and went to town on her bare pussy. “Roger! Oh my god!” He shoved a finger into her and thrust it in and out of her. “Oh Roggie! Please!” Dove screamed out. Roger smirked as he heard his pet name fall from her lips. “Please what, love?” He teased as he looked up at her. “Stop teasing me! I need you inside of me right now... make our consummation official.” She whimpered breathlessly. “I thought you’d never say it... alright... let me go get the rubbers.” Roger said as he removed his fingers from her wet flower and sucked on them as he went to the drawer to look for condoms. “Brian... everything about you is... long.” Lana said as she stared at the guitarist’s birthday suit. He was well endowed but it wasn’t just big it was long... Lana wondered how in the world did he manage to fit that into his pants everyday. “Uh... thank you? I don’t know if that’s a compliment or...” “It’s a compliment Bri. I’m just trying to figure out how you’re gonna fit in me.” Lana said. “We’ll just have to try.” He replied. Lana was almost completely bare herself except for her panties. “Are you going to take those off or am I gonna be the only one in here naked?” Brian asked as he crossed his arms around his bare chest. “Oh right.” She replied as she took a deep breath and took her panties off, revealing all of herself to him. “You’re a goddess.” He said as he drank in the sight of his wife in the nude. “Thank you... So, what are we going to do first?” Lana asked. “Well... I’m going to do this.” Brian got on top of her and kissed his way down from her stomach to her wet lower lips. “Please Brian... don’t tease.” Lana whimpered. “I have to get you ready though, my love.” He replied as he sat up straight and rubbed her with his skilled fingers as he looked at her lovingly, a hint of mischief in his eyes. “Stop being so cheeky.” She said with a giggle before moaning loudly as he thrust two fingers into her. “Ah! Brian!” She cried out with a slight blush of embarrassment adorning her face. While Brian relished in Lana’s embarrassment, John and Taylor were busy trying to please each other. “That’s it! Like that... Taylor! Your mouth... it’s perfect. It’s all too perfect! Let up baby.” He said breathlessly as he leaned back against the headboard and brought her face to his where their lips met. “Did I do good honey?” She asked, her eyes lighting up after the kiss. “You did beautifully.” “What’s next? You already pleased me... and I pleased you... and... oh... that’s next.” “Yes it is. We don’t have to if you’re not comfortable with it.” John said as he looked at her. “I want to but... it’s the pain I’m afraid of.” “It’ll be alright. Look, if it hurts that much when I enter you... tell me and I’ll pull out. Okay?” He said with a serious look on his face. “Okay.” She said as she nodded. John had found a condom and put it on himself. Taylor laid down, her eyes filled with a mixture of curiosity and worry. John positioned himself at her entrance. “Are you ready? Grab my hand if it hurts.” He said as she nodded and gasped at the sudden but brand new and foreign feeling of being filled for the first time.

“Oh my gosh! Fred!” Marina moaned loudly as she felt him finally fill her. He pulled her up into his lap and spanked her teasingly. “You alright my darling? Do you need a minute?” He asked. “No I’m fine dear. We can start.” She replied as she slowly brought herself on and off of his girthy length. “Oh Marina... we’ve only just begun and it feels so good.” Freddie groaned out as he slipped his hands under her bottom to bring her down harder on him. “Mmm it does, and you’re already hitting all the good spots.” She said with a whimper. “Darling... I might cum soon...” “Freddie dear, we just fucking started! Hold it in! Can you hold it in!? I want us to get there together...” “I’ll try darling. And don’t forget who’s in charge here.” He said in a low voice as he got on top of her and spanked her as he thrust in and out of her oh so deliciously, causing her to squeal and moan loudly. In the next room over, Roger had already entered Dove. “Is this what you wanted your Roggie to give you love?” He teased as he started to move after getting permission to do so. Dove was too overwhelmed by pleasure to answer and nodded briskly before a high pitched moan left her mouth. “Use your words, love.” He said as he panted a bit at the wonderful feeling he was experiencing right now with his wife. “Yes! Roger yes! Please move faster. I’m fucking begging you, move faster!” She cried out, desperate for more pleasure but at a faster pace. “You want me to make love to you faster? Such a dirty bird...” He teased. “Please... Roger... I need it...” “Hm? Need what?” He teased a bit further. “Give it to me faster! I need you to break me you bloody wanker!” She screamed. “Good... you used your words... such a good girl. Your wish is my command Mrs. Taylor.” Roger said as he leaned down and kissed her deeply as he sped up and thrusted harder causing the headboard to bang against the wall. Brian was thrusting into Lana at a reasonable pace and groaned when he heard the headboard banging from the other room next door to theirs and screams of debauchery. Brian was about to knock on the wall to tell them to shut up before Elizabeth stopped him. “Don’t let it... mmm... ruin this sweetheart.” Lana said as she looked up at him and caressed his face before he leaned down and kissed her, her hands suddenly in his curly poodle like hair. “Oh I’m definitely not.” Brian said softly as he leaned down more and kissed her neck, his groans and moans resounding in her ear. “Oh Brian! Ooh keep going!” “Of course my love!” He moaned as he kept at his reasonable pace. John was still waiting for Taylor to adjust to him. “I think I’m ready.” She said slowly. “Alright. If you want me to stop, please tell me.” He said. She nodded and smiled at him before moaning in unison with him as he started to move. “Ooh... J-John... it feels so good.” Taylor moaned out softly. “Don’t hide your moans... I like hearing them.” John said with a smile before he started to hit a certain spot in Taylor causing her to only increase the volume of her moans. “Oh John! Oh my gosh! Again! Right there please!” Taylor moaned out. John hit her spot again and sucked on her neck as he did it, both of them moaned loudly at the pleasure.

“Freddie! I’m about to-“ “Cum? I was gonna do that about five minutes ago darling...” He said breathlessly. “Oh shut up darling! Cum with me before I-!” “Yes! I’m about to- Marina! God yes!” Freddie moaned out loudly as he came undone. Marina wrapped her legs around his waist and arched her back as she met her own end. After they had finally met their ends, Freddie disposed of the condom and laid down next to his wife and grabbed her hand, kissing it as he looked at her. “I love you so much.” He said quietly. “I love you too Fred. Now, if you don’t mind... Mrs. Mercury would like to get her beauty sleep.” Marina said softly as she kissed him and turned out the light. “Oh? Well what if Mr. Mercury wants to wake Mrs. Mercury up in a few hours for a round two?” Freddie teased. “You’re so cheeky Freddie... but you’d better keep your hands above the blanket or Mrs. Mercury will kick you out of bed.” “Ah fuck off.” He said teasingly. “Goodnight Fred.” “Goodnight Mari.” Meanwhile, next door... “Roger! Please let me cum... I’m begging you!” “Not until you say it, Dove!” “No!” “Say it!” Dove couldn’t take this torture anymore. “I’m In Love With My Car was a wonderful song and you’re a genius Roggie!” She finally screamed as he thrust into her. “Now was that so hard to say?” He asked teasingly. “I said it so let’s cum already you wanker!” “Of course my love.” He hit her spot in the last few thrusts before they both came hard. A bit of Roger’s falsetto peeked out when he had his orgasm. Dove cried out hoarsely as she dug her nails into his back. He gathered up the strength to pull out and get rid of the condom before curling up in bed next to her. “So, how did you like it?” He asked as he brushed a strand of sweat drenched blonde hair from her just as sweaty forehead. “I hate you so much.” She muttered. “If you really hated me you wouldn’t have married me.” Roger said with a smirk. “Oh shut up! Go to sleep.” She said as she turned over, only to feel him hug her in bed from behind and hold her close. “Goodnight lovie.” He said softly into her ear before he kissed her and turned the light off. “Brian! Right there!” “There? That spot there?” He asked teasingly as he repeatedly hit the one spot in her he knew would make her a mess. “Oh yes! Brian! I’m going to-!” “Me too!” Brian came into the condom and felt Lana tighten around him as she came. “Oh my gosh! Brian... that was amazing.” Lana said with a huge smile on her face. “Yeah it sure was. Wow! I need some sleep after that one.” Brian joked before chuckling nervously at the thought of what they had just done. He threw the rubber away and turned the light off and got back under the blankets with Lana. “I don’t know why but now I’m embarrassed about what we just did.” Brian said quietly in the dark. “Bri... honey, it’s natural you and I both know that. And why’re you embarrassed? You’ve had sex before.” “I know that and I have but it’s just different... that was our first time as a married couple. I hope I gave you what you’ve probably dreamed about for a long time.” “Bri... you didn’t disappoint me. Actually you exceeded my expectations and sent me to the moon and back, and for that I thank you Mr. May. I love you Brian.” Lana said softly as she curled up and snuggled against him. He grinned and ran a hand through her hair as she leaned against his chest. “Thank you sweetheart, I love you too.” He said before they drifted off to sleep. John and Taylor were the last couple out of the band members to consummate their marriage that night. “John! M-my stomach feels funny!” Taylor cried out as her husband continued thrusting. “Baby that’s good... you’re about to have an orgasm. Relax and let it go.” John panted out as he kept going. Taylor threw her head back, her toes curling as she cried out and let it go. John took his last few thrusts and emptied his seed into the rubber. He disposed of it and collapsed next to Taylor. “John that was... exhilarating. I loved it.” She said. “I’m so glad you loved it baby.” “John... can we do it again?” She said with a smile on her face. John was still trying to catch his breath before turning the light off and looking at Taylor in the dark. “You wanna do it again!? We can but... we need sleep first. We were at it for hours.” He said as his breathing got back to normal. “Okay. Goodnight honey.” “Goodnight.” They kissed and fell asleep against each other almost immediately.

Needless to say, Queen had found the loves of their lives.

Prologue... END

#QUEEN OF ROSES #bohemian rhapsody #Queen #queen band #Freddie Mercury #Brian May #Roger Taylor #John Deacon #fanfic

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kip-quest-blog · 6 years

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It’s been a good year.

We’re coming up on KipQuest’s first year anniversary and it is with a heavy heart and a conflicted soul that I announce that I am going to be closing this blog.

What happened? D:

Nothing happened in the traditional sense. I came out here for a good time and I had a good time and then I stopped having a good time. So I decided that drastic measures needed to be taken. I don’t have the desire to quit pokeask blogging, or blogging in general, or art, or storytelling, or any of that.

I just want to quit this particular blog and all the other blogs attached to this primary blog outside of my artblog (which I made a sideblog for this exact reason) and Maat’s blog. The disconnect has been months in the making and it is not at all related to my mental health or my motivation for art, or even my lack of physical energy. I’d just rather be doing literally anything else and that’s a really really bad thing for a long term project.

I tried everything I could think of to get myself going again. Memes, interactions, hiatus, total disconnect from Tumblr, a different, less stressful blog. I tried a lot. And it didn’t work. Ideas just fall flat and die sometimes so I am taking my own advice and just doing what I want to do.

Where are you going?

I’m not going anywhere. I’m going to write a blog from start to end. I’m going to have a plan. I’m going to reevaluate myself and my life choices. I’m going to do something self-indulgent and something that I will be passionate about, even if I’m just a cliched and tropey mess. I don’t know what the blog will be or the format, or the style, or even the name. I don’t know anything right now.

I don’t even know if I’ll have an answer for that question anytime soon. I will, however, be on my artblog, drawing art and dumping it there every once in a while. I’ll still be drawing pokemon like a damn nerd and I will still love it. I will probably take all the art prompts I have stockpiled and go through them as I figure out what the fresh hell I am going to do.

I’ll still be on this primary blog while I work on my other things. All the memes will be posted on my artblog as I finish them. (Though I run mostly on a queue.)

How can we reach you?

Please for the love of god, follow me on Twitter. Interact with me on Twitter because 1v1 convos are not happening and that’s because I’m busy all the time with other things. Twitter is where you can see my hilariously awful jokes and updates that get pruned out so my art is the main attraction and I can still have my fun.

My discord is not open because it’s going to be the same deal. 1v1 convos are just not on my agenda unless you’re alright with me never speaking or just saying the same tired things all the time. (i’m tired/busy/sleepy/busy) Maybe someday I’ll be in a group discord where I can talk to a lot of lovely people at the same time. (I’m already mod in one, but it has been capped for now.)

Will you tell us what your new blog is when it’s made?

Maybe. I won’t try to use this blog to promote my new one because I feel that it is disingenuous to use this thing I didn’t finish to promote something I hopefully will. Pride? It’s more like guilt. I’d hate to be a disappointment again. I’d hate to disappoint you again.

What about this story?

I can give you the very short version of what I had originally intended for Kippy’s KipQuest under the cut if you want to know the story at the most surface level. There, you will see my incredible lack of planning. I will not elaborate much more than this in the interest of not writing a novel. I apologize that all the nuance is gone. Rip all the worldbuilding.

Just in case, you decide to not read under the cut (it’s all story stuff anyway) I wanted to say thank you for all the good times. I learned a lot about art, myself, and commitment. I asked a lot of questions to a lot of people and learned so much about others. It was fun while it lasted. This is not the last you will see of me. But this will likely be the last update post I make on this blog.

You know what they say, right? Better luck next time.

Kippy would have made their internal struggle known to their mother that they didn’t know whether to pick a boy name (Skipper after Amelia’s father) or a girl name (Pankaja which is a name related to soil though the language of origin escapes me). Kippy’s mother, Amelia, assured them that no matter what they ultimately decided, it was their choice to make and that she would be proud of her little kipper.

Kippy, who was born male, chose Pankaja as her official name but still likes Kippy as a nickname. She then takes on female pronouns and begins to make her way into the world at large. During this time, Jalon, a Honchkrow leader of the village Kippy lives in, has her put on a team prematurely because Jalon does not like that Baaba challenges his authority.

Baaba confronts the Grand Psion - a sort of gauge for an individual’s potential - and demands that he tell the truth about Kippy’s potential. The Grand Psion, who was most certainly lying about Kippy’s abilities at the request of Amelia, claims ignorance and Baaba doesn’t buy it, so he storms off with renewed vigor to get Kippy trained in the only way he knew how.

Amelia has the Grand Psion lie about Kippy’s potential because Kippy was born a Bad Egg because Amelia had a lot of trouble with having children. Amelia had a number of previous attempts with her mate, Armament - who was a Garchomp that died in the line of duty - but they all either miscarried or just did not hatch when they were supposed to. She begged the Grand Psion to lie about Kippy so Kippy wouldn’t get herself killed in a military life. Kippy never finds this out.

Kippy is paired with Pepin, a Buneary who failed to live up to his family’s astronomical expectations, and Pax, a Swablu who hates being a Priest and fulfilling the role of a “healer” despite having the ability to use Heal Pulse. The three of them are sent off on a mission that was not meant for them to complete, due to a mix up between assignments.

They end up delving into a cavern and finding evidence of humans existing as well as the Red and Blue Orbs and the Meteorite, which were placed in this deep cavern to keep Columbia, a radically violent and nihilistic Origin Jirachi, from continuing to hunt down and slaughter other Jirachi to gain their power.

Kippy releases Columbia, who very nearly kills the three of them on sight and disappears into the Realm of the Fairies, who have begun preparations to make an attempt at truce.

Bellatrix, who had saved Kippy and Arimus from the approaching Fairies in the beginning, ended up returning to face those approaching intruders head on with her partner, Ronnie. Ronnie is a Gardevoir who did not gain the Fairy typing when the original Blight swept the land. Nobody knows why this was, but that is the only reason she is accepted in the Valley of Darkness.

That Fairy party was a party sent by the highest order of fairy nobles to attempt a truce with the smaller neighboring land before a hopeful collaboration to unify with the Land of Dragons. The Prince of the Fairies was sent as a means of instilling an element of trust, but Bellatrix doesn’t believe that the instigators of this divisive conflict have any positive intentions in mind. She mega evolves, kills most of those present on both sides, and flees into the forest, where she succumbs to the dangerous power that mega evolution entails and falls into madness fueled only by fury and rage. Ronnie survives only because the Fairy Prince, Adelaide, stabilized her.

When Kippy and company return to the village, Jalon panics because he assumed they were going to do something simple, and instead came back with items that belong to the Land of Dragons. In order to maintain control of his people, he accuses Kippy and company of being insiders and mounts an attack using only his Murkrow flock. Pax’s trainer was an Eevee and she jumps in to protect her trainee, evolving into a Sylveon to have a better chance of fending Jalon’s lackeys off, though this solidifies the accusation that Kippy and co (and by extension, their families) are spies for the enemy.

Amelia immediately and instinctually uses her combined strength with Pax’s trainer, and Baaba, to give Kippy and co a chance to escape alive. It is never determined whether their families survived this attack because Kippy never ends up going back.

Baaba finds them in the hills outside of the village. Kippy is panicking, but Pax and Pepin are able to calm her down well enough for the four of them to figure out where they need to go. Baaba says that the Land of Dragons would be their best bet because he knows someone who has clout.

They are discovered by an adventuring party of Fairies, are captured, and taken back to the main hub where all the decisions are made. They are granted amnesty because the Fairies are attempting to make peace with the surrounding areas.

The Fairies are under the control of Xerneas, who is a fragmented and corrupted being that was created by The Bastard Palkia. Xerneas itself is an instinctual being, who has complete and total mind control over all Fairies on this world when it is awake. It only ever seeks to destroy anything that would oppose it, as well as anything that it deems a danger to it. Xerneas had been asleep for a while, but the damage already done had to be slowly undone, which proved to be almost impossible considering that the sight of a Fairy usually meant a fight was going to break out, so peace talks were rare and were hardly ever successful.

Kippy wants to help, naturally, but has no idea how to do so. She thinks that the Jirachi she released would be able to help, so she goes looking for it. Baaba stays close by for the longest time until he is attacked during another encounter with Columbia and is revealed to be a Zoroark. Kippy takes this rather well in the moment, but later confronts Baaba about it.

Baaba explains that pokemon in the area all live on a massive island created by the same Mewtwo who gave Bellatrix the ability to mega evolve. This area used to be a secluded safe haven in Kalos, so many pokemon who were harmed by experimentation make up the population, which is why there is a rather tumultuous civilization in the works. Columbia offers to spare this world if they can convince the slumbering native Jirachi to appear so Columbia can take it. It is assumed that Columbia’s attempts at seeking the native Jirachi failed, and he claimed that he was “helping” the mortals because he is a god.

Columbia is an elder god, but he is also a creation of The Bastard and is therefore, fundamentally broken on every single level of his existence. This doesn’t really matter, but Columbia spins it in a way to make himself look better, and to get Kippy and Baaba to call the native Jirachi. This works later on and that Jirachi is shredded and consumed by Columbia, who then departs to find more Jirachi to consume after flipping all his middle fingers up at the preps.

Baaba does not accept Columbia’s offer, but Kippy comes up with a plan to trick Columbia into a false sense of security. This plan fails miserably. Columbia kills the native Jirachi, and in retaliation for mortals even attempting to lie to him, wakes Xerneas up from its deep slumber. He naturally has a big villain speech explaining how Fairies are indeed evil by design because The Bastard doesn’t care about what it makes and leaves things to fester. Even humans have harnessed Fairy energy to create devastating weapons and this is no exception.

Xerneas arises and takes control of all the Fairies. At the same time, in human civilization, Magearna and the Ultimate Weapon designs are finished and deployed. The rise in harmful energy leads to a chain reaction where Xerneas’s instability directly contributes to the creation of a second, more unstable Yveltal constructed of corrupted energy.

Yveltal flees, spreading devastation and destruction everywhere. The world begins to end and there is a bright light in the sky.

Kippy and co try their best to help, but they are divided on what to do. Xerneas needs to be stopped, but there is chaos unfolding around them as they try to escape the Realm of Fairies and make their way to the Land of Dragons. Baaba has stayed with them, and no longer assumes the form of a Rattata. When they make it to the Land of Dragons, Baaba seeks out and finds the oldest dragon there, a Charizard named Basil.

Basil is upset at how these events have unfolded, but when the gods are involved, it never ends well. He promises that his attacks will be swift, but he is not optimistic. Kippy is worried, though by this time, she has evolved from a Mudkip/Gible into a Garchomp. There was a lot of tears shed and fear throughout this transitionary period, but she is determined.

Columbia has disappeared, but his presence alerted Marty, a Celebi who immediately arrives to survey the damage. It’s too much to bear. The end of the world is coming naturally, so he begins his job to tie up the loose ends and let the world collapse in itself. Despite Baaba begging that Marty not do this, Marty does not listen. Baaba lashes out because he wants Kippy to be okay. That’s his partner. His most trusted companion. And he is too smart to let her go so easily.

Marty explains that it’s better for all of existence if this world dies naturally instead of being ripped apart for no reason. Xerneas must be contained. Baaba asks Marty if Xerneas could be contained, would that allow the world to be left alone. Marty makes no promises, but does hint that their time would be extended, as everything dies eventually.

Baaba and Kippy convince Pepin and Pax to go back to the village to reiterate the information that they learned. They also convince Marty to go with them to confirm their story. Baaba and Kippy then go to Xerneas, who is deep within the forests, wandering and screaming.

Baaba has a special tool that he plans to use in order to get Xerneas under control. They fight, they win, Kippy mega evolves, and Baaba uses a Master Ball to seal Xerneas away.

It, at one point, would have been made known that Baaba is from human settlements in Kalos, where he was born before his mother made a deal with Mewtwo to create this supposed sanctuary. Humans had done a lot of fucked up shit prior to this and his mother was the result of experiments in testing pokemon’s potential. He carried with him a couple of tools from the human settlements because he inherited that human level of intelligence and planning.

Once Xerneas is sealed away in the Master Ball, Baaba explains to Kippy that there is a whole other world out there to explore and he remembers fondly traveling through Kalos a little bit before his mother whisked him away from humans as a whole. He says he wants Kippy to see the world for what it is, a wonderful place, but humans are also not to be messed with. Baaba explains that humans treat pokemon differently and sometimes badly and he wants to change that, but the only way he knows how is to show them. He offers Kippy the opportunity to go with him to Kalos. Kippy accepts.

Baaba also offer this opportunity to Pepin and Pax, both of whom have evolved fully. Pepin accepts. Pax does not.

It ends with Kippy and Pepin willingly being put into customized pokeballs and Baaba assuming the form of a human before it’s assumed that they go to Kalos and change the human world as well.

That’s all ey wrote. Hopefully the next time I do this, I do a better job.

#ooc #blog update

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