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br1ghtestlight · 6 months

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zeke and jimmy jr are so fucking stupid. immediately a 10/10 episode just for tankbottoms (tank tops for your bottom™️)

THEYRE SO FUCKING STUPID THERES TEARS IN MY EYES..... if anybody ever hurts these boys ever in their lives i dont know what im going to do. probably cry about it

BABYYY ZEKE HES SO ADORABLE 😭😭💕 love how squished his face is. he's Three apples tall snd very very small

Hey guys :D love how she's dropped the "hey jimmy jr!!! ZEKE." thing and started being normal about greeting them. sorry we're not even a minute into the episode i just love these kids so much they're sooo sweet and so stupid. accurate middle schooler representation

jimmy jr and tina talking :') they're buddies. love that he's already explained this tankbottoms idea to tina and she Does Not Like It

HEY GENE BROWN EYES MENTION!!! always love to have rhat confirmed

oh that jimmy pesto impression is UNCANNY. aww why are they fighting they were sorta kinda becoming friends. not really but in my heart they were after the christmas episode and them racing cars together

"aahh im bored' oh so he's literally just gay? is that what this is?

JIMMY PESTO SAYING ITS BEEN SLOW AT HIS PLACE LATELY LMAO i wonder why that could be!! surely no real world events coincided with that happening!!!!

jimmy pesto is so stupid i missed him so much. i missed ur stupid stupid handsome face SO MUCH u idiot. kisses him

YOU GET ONE PACK OF RATS COVERED IN ROACHES 😭

love how he's Literally just trying to be friends with bob and bob is like. can you leave? could you please leave?? there's something going on here not even gay people have a word for. this is a brand new type of interaction

"our rats and roaches dont get along" "aah well you're lucky"

"right that was ALMOST a normal conversation but you're you soo you said that" *fart noise* "THATS YOU" why is jimmy literally the equivalent of a boy teasing a girl he has a crush on on the playground bcuz he likes her and doesnt know how to show it. what is their PROBLEM

aww louise reading the burobu magazine 🥺🥺💕 sorry this is relevant to a fanfic im working on. also love these new views of the playground thats also great to have (also for the same fanfic) (there's a lot going on in this fanfic)

jimmy jr is so fucking stupid and literally my baby boy. ACTUAL love of my life. he's so dumb <3

"teatherball? oh my god. another TB" there's literally zero braincells in that boys head this is already one of my favorite jimmy jr episodes. also zeke getting jealous that tina is spending time around a boy who hates zeke?? kinda cute. he liiiikes her :) i think he's also just terrified of will but i think he's also a little jealous maybe. zeke contains multitudes

"I just, uh, don't want to have fun... like that. With a bunch of balls in my mouth."

"Fine. Some people are just more open to new ideas."

presenting this conversation with no context. AND jimmy pesto being gay in the background bcuz of course he would be

okay well im already assuming this b plot is gonna go in the direction of jimmy pesto copying bob bcuz business has been slow for him and he thinks bob is generally a better cook so if he copies him maybe he'll get more business too. which is ADORABLE and reminds me so much of the christmas episode where jimmy pesto recommended bob's food bcuz it was so good. also if jimmy thinks that bob is copying his business FJDMDJFKDKDSJ reminds me of a past episode i cant remember the name of but like better.... bcuz they're gay and stupid

gene is a sweet boy <3 sweet song and moment. love that him and louise are just always hanging out together

ohh jimmy jr he's so sweet 😭 he loves zeke so much its adorable. i know there's nothing anybody could do or say to make him stop loving zeke or wanting to be his friend and its actually really cute. he's been great in this episode

"My sweet best friend. My sweet, sweet Zeke..."

love jimmy jr being just as heartbroken over somebody being mean to zeke as i am FJDMDJDKSKS he's literally DEVASTATED by this news. who would bully zeke he's literally a baby? just a baby boy??

"I don't like bullies. And I especially don't like them at our school. And in our sister's grade. I mean, what if he makes Tina pee and embarasses her? She's already fighting an uphill battle."

louise is both very sweet and protective and also VERY funny lmao SHES ALREADY FIGHTING AN UPHILL BATTLE

love jimmy jr louise and gene's dynamic in this episode. they care so much about their babies (zeke and tina) its cuuute

"i feel bad for zeke too but i just dont think aggression is the answer" coming from the kid who got his ass beat by a nine year old. on MULTIPLE occasions

love mort ordering the burger of the day like he has a gun pointed at his head FJDMDKDKSKSS also mort and teddy getting along!! yay!!!! big win for the tedmort shippers in the fandom

"Zeke... I just want you to know that I'm here for you and I care about you." when did jimmy jr get all emotionally mature??

WOLLY BULLY

"I get why you wouldn't want to tell me, because I'm one of the cool kids..." gonna need a citation for that one jimmy jr

if there's one thing louise is gonna do its ignore EVERYBODY telling her not to do something for revenge and do it anyway. like girl u gotta know when to let something go i know you're protective but FJDMSKSDKDK

"whats going on down there" dont even worry about it rudy

i love school episodes they're so silly. still a 50/50 chance zeke WAS the bully vs being bullied and this is a misunderstanding but either way this is very fun and i love seeing all the kids hanging out at recess and lunch etc

tina has had like three lines total in this episode where IS that girl

"i was the bully" yeah i figured since this episode still has half the runtime left and no other possible way this conflict could go LMAO but on that note its kinda sweet that he's made friends and a life for himself at wagstaff and he's not mean to kids anymore. he's a good kid in his heart & he always was

NOT THE APPLE JUICE 😭😭💔

not tina crushing on will in the background.... its not ur episode girl get outta here

"i can see that" rudy is there something you'd like to share with the class 🤨🏳️‍🌈

"SORRY me spraying juice on you wasn't bullying! That was just an accident." POOR GENE he's so worried about upsetting someone or hurting their feelings

BABY ZEKE COMPILATION TJIS IS A BIG MOMENT FOR ME gonna need to screenshot this after bcuz he's so small. maybe the smallest boy in the whole entire world

"i was always the new kid and it wasn't easy making friends" 😭😭💕 AND NOW HE HAS TINA AND JIMMY JR GENE LOUISE RUDY and even tammy and jocelyn (kinda sorta) and he doesnt need to be nervous anymore..... he has a home and he's never going to leave. sorry brb im crying i love zeke and their littlr friend group so much

BETWEEN THAT AND MY IMPULSE CONTROL ISSUES I JUST STARTED WRESTLING KIDS sorry zeke is many things but he is NOT smart thats why him and jimmy jr are two peas in a pod. not a braincell between them

HE JUST HAD A LOT OF NERVOUS ENERGYYYY okay adhd zeke is literally canon now. to me. like i dont care what the episode says thats true now in my heart they basically said it

and then i kept trying to make them laugh :( zeke noo he's such a sweetheart and a good kid. he never had anybody who LIKED him before who really saw him for who he was until jimmy jr and their friend group. sobbing. I HAD A GROUP OF FRIENDS AND A NICKNAME IT WAS THE FIRST TIME I FELT LIKE I REALLY BELONGED....... CRYING SOBBING THROWING UP ETC

ive been told i have the perfect neck for headlocks. okay thank you rudy

jimmy jr is soo emotionally mature and thoughtful in this episode. TINA WHAT ON EARTH R U DOING IN THIS EPISODE she didnt even react to zeke's story bro. its so over

like a little italian squirrel :)

"Linda's right, Bob. And my therapist would say that you should focus on your own happiness and not compare it to other people's."

"Your therapist is an IDIOT!"

"You take that back, Bob! Do not speak of Doctor Marjorie that way. That woman has put up with SO MUCH in her life! The balls haven't always rolled her way!"

😭😭??? this was so funny lmao. also love how casually teddy mentions his therapist (throughout the entire show!! she was mentioned in his first appearance) and how normalized it is. like yeah he has a therapist and he has mental health issues & trauma and its just something he casually mentions

also mort always talks about ordering the soup at bobs burgers but we've NEVER seen soup on the menu or anybody else eating soup there what is up with that?? does bob make the soup especially for mort??? what is going on there. so many unanswered questions

"Look I don't know what THIS is..." *gestures vaugely to bob and jimmy pesto* Thats literally exactly how i feel whenever i watch an episode with them now. i dont know what the hell is going on between them and quite frannkly thats none of my business!!!

"im not SHRIEKING!!!!" he shrieked

"Zeke! Listen. We've all done things we're not proud of. I used to tell Andy and Ollie that there was actually only one of them. It messed with them for weeks. The point is... we recognize our mistakes and we learn from them. It's how we grow."

ONE we got a big brother jimmy jr mention HELL YEAH‼️‼️ love him tormenting andy and ollie he's such a terrible big brother (affectionate) and TWO in my head this is kinda jimmy jr apologizing for how he's fucked over tina in the past?? maybe im literally delusional about them but him admitting he's done things he isnt proud of and that he's hurt people before. cmon. thats gotta be about tina right. just lie to me at this point

JIMMY JUNIOR LMAOO he's literally so silly in this episode im obsessed with him

WHAT THE HELL WILL??

did zeke make fun of will for being a dancer lmfao thats why he wanted jimmy junior to leave right. he doesnt want jj to hate him

HE MADE FUN OF MY LISP 😭😭 no thats literally actually worse bcuz jimmy junior's lisp is soo. god. but zeke loves jimmy jr so much i know he would never do that to him. he literally LOVES that boy so goddamn much

YOUR LIPS FJDMDDJDKDKDD THEY LOOK FINR TO ME. somebody needs to sedate me im gonna become a jimmy jr fan account after this episode

JIMMY JR NOOOOOOOO ZEKE LOVES U HES UR BEST FRIEND. if they stop being friends after this episode im killing myself. like it would be so over for me. couldnt live after that theyre besties. theyre BESTIES

imagining if this was jimmy jr instead of will and actually literally crying real tears over it

I DONT EVEN THINK I WANT TO DO TANKBOTTOMS WITH YOU ANYMORE. thats literally worse than divorce whats even the point

"I mean, a lot of people don't know this but I have a speech impediment."

"Huh."

"Really?"

"Ooh I never noticed..."

"Yeah. I worked through a lot of it but sometimes it still shows up."

love this dumbass autistic boy. he's my sweetheart angel i would die for him 1000 times over and over

I THOUGHT TINA WAS GONNA ASK ZEKE TO SHOW HIS BUTT SAYING "I mean you could...." i was like ooohkay tina sure. okay

aww bob is so smart. and cool

JIMMY JR HOLDING ZEKES BACKPACK FOR HIM sorry idk why i thought that was so cute. gonna need a screenshot of that

LOVE GENE AND LOUISES EXPRSSSIONS IN THIS SCENE sorry okay im paying attention to their gay little fight too ig

AWWW HAHA ZEKE IS SUCH AN OLDER BROTHER this scene is so cute. him teasing gene and louise <3

THIS EPISODE WAS SOO ADORABLE OMG i loved jimmy jr in this episode and his friendship with zeke. maybe my favorite episode this season?? its hard to say bcuz all of them have been so enjoyable and good but i love school setting episodes and zeke is such a good character. the subplot was also really good w/ jimmy pesto although i will NOT be letting bob forget what happened between them in the christmas episode and when he brought jimmy pesto his pain meds. he might forget but i will NOT. they were seriously for real gay there

#txt #bob's burgers #episode review #10/10 episode loved it 😁

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pezpenser205 · 2 months

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i dont know how to word this but i feel like a lot of my online leftist peers dont really understand the complexity of what theyre talking about a lot of the time. like they want to examine something on a systemic level while still stereotyping a class/religion etc as an individual or a monolith for them to direct hate towards rather than as individual moving parts of a machine that can most of the time be repurposed for good.

everyone wants reform until you tell them that reform sometimes entails sitting down with your kind of ignorant asshole uncle who doesnt understand why saying certain words is bad to explain things to him in a way he can understand (which sometimes entails not using progressive buzzwords and simplifying shit a lot). everyone wants reform until that reform entails actually trying to patiently talk to people who suck and making them suck less. like yeah theres for sure people who are always gonna suck but i dont think holding your mildly ignorant misogynistic uncle john to the same level of hopeless bigotry as andrew tate is accurate. one of those people can very easily and safely be on your side within the next 3 years and the other is a sex trafficker.

uncle john can literally be voting democrat next year because his bigotry doesnt come from outright malice and calculated desire for control like andrew tates does. you really do just sometimes have to fucking talk to stupid people im sorry lol you cant just kill mildly bigoted people or wait for them to die. bc like. they have thoughts. that can very easily be redirected. i get the bitterness i really do but not all bigoted people are equally as bad as eachother. its way more complicated than that. because like what are you gonna do to the bigoted uncle johns in the future that will inevitably be a part of every generation? kill them? isolate them from society? ignore their existence without addressing the problem? yeah real leftist of you. sureeeeee 🙄

#op

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schizosupport · 12 days

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Hi! I never send asks I'm sorry if this is weird or awkward? I'm just sitting in a mental health ward right now and trying to figure out whats going on.

So I've had mental health problems for a decade now but the past week is the first time my paranoia and things have ever gotten this bad, it felt like there were creatures? shadow people? in my apartment and i was only safe if i stayed totally still and silent cause then they couldnt hurt me, i kept seeing them out of the corner of my eyes, and it just wasnt safe to touch the floor or look in mirrors in the same way your brain wont let you touch a hot stove and no one seems to understand when i explain that its just not safe i cant do it and i cant explain. Is there a word for that? i dont understand any of this.

But it just kept getting worse and worse until my friend called the police on me and they took me to the hospital. ive calmed down now and realize it wasnt real but it FELT real and I feel like im going insane and don't know what to do, theyre saying its micropsychosis because of my bpd and because its supposedly bpd they dont know if they can help with meds but i dont feel like i can function like this, i know it gets bad again when im alone and i live alone and no one here seems to understand anything about psychosis at all, they keep giving me pamphlets on anxiety and breathing exercises (helpful but not what I need-what do i do when im seeing things? when something feels unsafe do i force myself to do it anyways as exposure therapy? or treat it like its real and try and calm down that way?) And basically i was wondering if you have any advice? or even reliable places to read more to learn about psychosis or micropsychosis or whatever this is? i just know its terrifying and im scared and dont feel like i can talk to anyone about it. Sorry this got so long!

Hi there!

It sounds like you had a really scary episode of paranoia, I'm sorry that happened to you! It's definitely recognizable to me as an experience, and I completely understand why you are scared of being that irrationally afraid again. It's very scary to lose control of your own mind in that way.

It always sucks when the MH professionals around you don't seem to quite understand your difficulty. While they may be right that this sounds like it could be an episode of "micro psychosis" that could be associated with bpd (or other disorders), that doesn't mean that it isn't a type of psychosis and that you can't benefit from resources geared more at that.

I would say about medication that the professionals may be reluctant around antipsychotic medication, because those are very side effect heavy medications, but if you continue to have experiences like this, it's not to say that it couldn't be worth it for you. Everyone responds very differently.

As for how to "deal with it" it's honestly very hard, especially in the beginning, and it's not something I can easily summarize in my current state and everyone is very different. But I think that trying to find things that make you feel more safe in the moment is important, even if it's "silly". Like for me, if I'm having a bad time when I'm going to sleep, I'll sleep with my lights on to avoid the worst of the paranoia. And I know some people have a teddy they consider protective, stuff like that. It might seem like "leaning into the crazy", but I don't personally think that it's harmful to use the "crazy" logic of these episodes to find a bit of comfort as well.

I hope that you can start to feel more safe.. and if this continues or gets worse I hope you can find some help from the professionals in your life.. otherwise I recommend looking for communities of others with similar experiences.

I hope this answer finds you well,

Glitch

#answers

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youve-doomed-us-all-jerk · 18 days

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and finished it ,got dat true ending yes def had a great time on the game 8/10 (but yeah performance def docked some points as well as some writing threads that felt kinda dropped, but am trying to in good faith piece it together in me mind so just gonna ramble spoilers under the cut:

when people said this is what they wanted the original DD to be i can see that but like i feel like the lead up to the game kept hearing people who know more about the originals history talk about how "40-60% of the original vision was cut down" from dd1 and i feel like my brain unfortunately interpreted that as "oh cool so were gonna have 100 new vocations like the monk and 100 monsters and the parallel worlds(technically true☝🏽🤓) and the moon stuff, neat" thats on me lmao but yeah removing those expectations and seeing it for what it is, its def the spirit of the the first game but its systems deeper and more fleshed out not good at all the techny terms but im not very into or good at action games but this one made me want to be cuz the combat was fun haha hmm writing wise there was a point where i felt like everything just suddenly got dropped once the godbane stuff started happening and youre suddenly barreling to the ending while everything else just wasnt important anymore lmao, but trying to interpret the story as a story the pathfinder is weaving, i think its meant to feel like that cuz we see the pathfinder essentially write us out of problems, give us a griffin to escape slavery, gives us a clue to where were supposed to go and the big one he like straight up changes ambrosius mind about giving us the godsbane when it wouldnt make sense for him too, the old man by harve even alludes to this by saying the real world is much messier when hes telling you about how fake everything is, like the watcher said everyone there is there to play a part in a tale hes laid out and i think he wanted to get to the ending faster. It's definitely another layer they added from the first games cycle, but do wish if that is what theyre going for(and if im not delusional lmao) that they did more like the ambrosius thing just watching as he ass pulls us out of dead ends making us feel what rothais felt when he realized all his feats and hardships didnt matter, also just would have liked more sidequests with fun characters lmao.

Also did enjoy the endings of the 3 major peoples in the unmoored world and felt like their side quests really fleshed them out and led them there to their endings well,mostly, very cool idea to bring it all together like that. elves wanted to stay isolated but they needed outside influence to break tradition, to save their tree and how it all built to them agreeing to seek refuge with the other races rather than die with their way of life. Ironic that disa was half right about sven needing to inherit the throne but ofc she was also half wrong cuz she a tyrant and wants him to have it mainly cuz of blood, but he deserves it cuz his sidequests were about him getting to know the common folk and becoming self assured lmao battahl tbh full disclosure i messed up the queen nadias sidequest to the rose chateau, tried to scare the dick head shopkeeper into giving me the medicine for the beastren and got arrested so idk how that one ends(will find out in NG+ lmao) but based on the ones i did do, it seems like the nations whole thing was about always being in conflict with each other and how the unmoored quests there are about making people put there differences aside and band together, including the arisen teaming with phaesus. Also like the irony of their view on pawns being right at first but by the end of the game they end up being wrong. but yeah do feel like they didnt get into that more, along with what the lambent flame is? (googled that there was lore texts you can find that explain how an earlier emperor is deceiving the people about it and what it really does) they also dont go into the fact vermund was a nation of beastren, started by a beastren and then history was wiped?? and how theres vermundians fear of beastren and human children always look like beastren and yet wilhelmina is a direct contradiction of this?? that seemed like a really juicy plot point but they didnt really do anything with it. and lastly idek where to start with the pawn and arisen ending, found out theres slight differences in the affinity ending (got the high affinity one cuz reds my my gurl i always revive run straight to her to revive her🤗) but watching them talk about how happy they are to have their own will while saying theyd still do anything for you filled me with something, dont even know what but was crazy.

oh also before i forget another way its in the spirit of the first game for me is just like in the original i also forgot to talk to the person i was romancing and giving them flowers before the endings and got diff people appearing there just like my first playthru of the dd1 lmfao( got manela with grigori and sara in the true ending, was going for ulrika this playthru lmfao) def gonna NG+, maybe do a magic archer and get the stuff i missed and try and get the other endings. Also hoping for another expansion/dlc like they did with dd1 down the line with more vocations and monsters.

#dragons dogma 2 #dd2 #dd2 spoilers

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cerealmonster15 · 11 months

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ALL OF HEARTSLABYUL FOR UNHINGED CHARACTER BINGO‼️‼️‼️

VIBRATES AT A NORMAL SPEED I AM SO NORMAL ABOUT HEARTSLABYUL LET'S GO

[bingo link!]

actually. using a readmore bc there are Five Character Bingos and i like to talk under all of them LOL

RIDDLE RIDDLE BELOVED BABY SON RIDDLE:

[TWO BINGOS i forgot to cross them tho lol] thats my baby son BOY!!!!! I FUCKING LOVE RIDDLE ROSEHEARTS HES MY BABYYYYY!!!!! riddle was one of the first characters i told my partner about when i was trying to explain twst to him and we very often refer to it as Riddle Game jfksjkfl. for my birthday and stuff sometimes my partner gets me riddle themed things - i have a riddle little guy hanging on the wall and my partner found his union bday jacket patches that i bought a jacket to go with and im... EVENTUALLY going to sew them on so ill have a RIDDLE JACKET [rn theyre pinned to it i just have to take my damn sewing machine out and DO IT!!!!] i love him DEEPLY and i relate to him on . some personal levels. DONT WORRY ABOUT IT but he is my special little boy with so many problems but he has also GROWN and i AM SO PROUD OF HIM AND WHWUWHFEHHRGH hes made FRIENDS 😭😭😭😭😭 hes such a wild little firecracker and I can and will talk about riddle FOREVER. forcibly cutting myself OFF bc we have MORE CHARACTERS to go!!!

also i think riddle probably needs a hug and would benefit greatly from it but would also Not Be Adjusted to hugs you must be GENTLE with your approach or he will BITE!!!

JUICE SPADE LIGHT OF MY LIFE:

this made me realize hes actually probably one of the more well adjusted characters in twst jfkldjsfklds hes a good boy!!! he loves his mom and his mom loves him!!! hes doing his best!! he loves his friends even if sometimes hes shy about it lol!!!! i didnt circle the therapy one even tho tbh i feel like everyone in twst could deeply benefit from it i jsut jklfdsj feel like that square is reserved for the more Severe Cases of Needing Issues Sorted jlkdsfkld. and obviously i want him to be happy but i feel like he mostly already is!!! anyway. my absolute baby of boys. i think i have the most SSRs of him than any other character in my game kfjsdjklfj he was my first freebie ssr dorm card and i work at trying to get it uncapped as much as possible i want juice to be my STRONGEST BOY!!!!!! I LOVE HIM ID KILL FOR HIM THATS MY SON!!!! ill marry his mom if thats what it takes to Make Him My Son For Real fjsdkfjklefjskldjflJKLSDJKKFLJSDKLFJ

moving ON!!!!

CAY CAY DIAMOND MY BELOVED CAYCAY:

[TWO BINGOS AGAIN] caycay is both FUN IN THE SUN but also. melancholic enigma. hes got some Issues going on below the surface that's like blink and u miss it since it's mostly only breadcrumbed in a few side stories but enough to make us like HEY whats going ON over there!!! but not too much to have me be like HORRIBLE SAD FOREVER BOY either. i think it's like. a mixed situation. but mysterious enough that we just dont know how far it goes. he's deeper than he seems and that's INTERESTING. but ALSO on the surface he IS a very fun goofy guy that loves his friends!!!!!! god i have very specific feelings about him and also. relate to him in certain ways Dont Worry About It but fjksdjlkfsd i love him. i want him to be happy. i have a Very Specific Way that i see his character and i turn into a rabid beast when i feel like people dont quite GET IT!!!! but sometimes thats a me problem LOL. other times tho. other times im like Did You Read The Same Game I Did Bc I Dont Think You Did RIDDLE AND CATER ARE FRIENDS IM GONNA BITE PEOPLE THAT THINK THEYRE NOT anyway. im very normal about cater diamond and his relationship to heartslabyul.

basket ball baby boy ACE:

i feel like it doesnt come across as much bc outside of my screaming about heartslabyul as a Unit i dont really scream about ace by himself ksldfjs but i actually really love ace a lot LOL hes SUCH a funny little guy. definition of a rascal and a shithead JFKSLJFSJK but i love him actually. i think it took longer for me to like him at first bc hes kind of a bitch but i quickly realized "oh this is villain school for villains and Everyone Is A Bitch" LOL and it's so fun. love that for him. ace is a little bastard who loves to cheat and lie and it's so funny thinking about that just Being His Thing. im obsessed with how in book 3 they were like "we need to sneak our way into the museum" and im p sure ace was like "yea let me lie my way through distracting the guard you guys wouldnt stand a chance you need my lying powers" and hes RIGHT. but also i think hes a really good boy when it counts 😭 hes a BASTARD but he LOVES HIS FRIENDS. Like he and juice are SO ride or die with the main character theyre the BESTIE TRIO + GRIMMY... THEY LOVE EACH OTHER!!! they took PUBLIC TRANSIT to come save MC when we called them in book 4 and then never answered again lkdfsjj and they were WORRIED when we vanished in book 6 + were up in arms about grim getting captured bc THATS OUR SILLY LITTLE CAT!!! and also in book 6 [many book 6 feelings SORRY a LOT happened in that book that ill never be over omg i love it so much] UM UM UM i love how when everyone is like "oh ill give my money to ramshackle!!" ace was like "well im not" LOL hes so funny. but like he was also really nice to juice i think 😭 like juice was feeling the moral dillema of "my mom and i could really use that money but i feel like i have to donate to my friends shitty dorm like everyone else" and ace was the one that told him like "dude dont worry about it you dont gotta be a hero. im keepin my money cuz i want cool shoes. ur fine." and like. it was silly but sweet 🥺 or like in fairy gala 2 when he went to go check on ortho..... sweet boy... ^ love that i rambled More about ace than the others im def more insane about fklsdkjfdlsjf ace is that sleeper character that Gets Me when im not expecting it LOL also i just dont talk about him as much so i didnt cut myself off immediately LOL i could def go longer about the others. forever.

OK ANYWAY TIME FOR TREY:

i also dont talk as extensively about trey but Love Him dearly. all the heartslabyul boys got that "if anything happens to them ill blow up" "id kill anyone who hurts them" and "id take a bullet for them" BC I LOVE HEARTSLABYUL SO MUCH!!!!!! THOSE ARE MY SILLY LITTLE GUYS!! trey is so funny to me. like he. whats with the teeth thing trey. jksdlfsd it's SO funny to me his hobby is brushing his teeth. there's at least one or two times i think it's mentioned where he checked ace and deuce's teeth bc like? ?? ? ? i think in one of his voice lines he said it's a habit from doing it with his little siblings [BIG BROTHER BEHAVIOR SO SWEET WAGHGHGHGHHH] and i think there's a card story where ace was trying to skip out and cut corners on the Teeth Ritual and trey was like Not On My Watch 🧍‍♂️ jkfjsdjf hes so funny. he literally went into fanboy mode in halloween 2 when he found out sebeks dad is dentist. he tries so hard to be seen as A Normal Guy and yet hes Like That. hes science club besties with resident freak ROOK HUNT [beloved i love u rook hunt]. his childhood friends are teapot tyrant riddle and wildcard catboy chenya. his other bestie is terminally online partyboy caycay. he loves stupidass little jokes and he + cater sometimes like to lightly terrorize the underclassmen for funsies skjfjklsjf. friendly boys with an Evil side jfkldsjkldskljf.

also. do not get me started on his friendships with riddle and cater. i can and will go insane about the three of them oh my god if i think about them too long i get emotional and we'll be here forever. theres so much complexity there but also i WILL bite anyone that tries to say cater and trey's friendship is all a lie + surface level only or that trey cares about riddle more ILL BITE ILL BITE ILL CHEW. yknow what i didnt circle the 10 hour speech about trey or ace but tbh i could. those two it would be more about them and their relationships with other characters but LISTEN TO ME i love heartslabyul. SO MUCH. they make me insane.

i got this ask earlier and i was like "no i will not have time to do this til im home later bc i WILL need to talk about them for 800 years. circling squares is not enough." jfkslfjsjdljf

#me rushing to post my diasomnia fic: HURRY UP I NEED TO TALK ABOUT HEARTSLABYUL RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#asks #felix-the-lemon-king #thanx felix you knew the cheat codes for Making Me Unwell jkljfKDLJKLSJFKLSJJFDSKJJ

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matoitech · 11 months

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ok uhh okay. spiderverse 2 thoughts. in bullet points for the sake of my churning brain cuz im just not rly sure how i feel abt it rn. like it was a good movie? i enjoyed it it was fast paced i didnt realize 2+ hours went by which also segues into my first thought but like. yeah i have thoughts.

first of all that was like a super weird ending decision to make it a part 1 of 2. zero warning for that. and i sat in that theater till credits bcuz i genuinely thought i was being punked and the movie was going to finish, bcuz it did not at all feel like a place to stop for the movie. it ends like right before the climax?? yes they really. extended themselves damn far for this one and it would be a lot to tie up in like another 45 minutes of movie but also like you couldve done it.. i really dont. understand. like ppl just sat in the movie theater like wait is it done. theyre ending it here? for real? like it wasnt the kind of ending you expect from this movie

animation was obviously gorgeous and insane i dont even need to talk about what eye candy it was. the different styles all together the fight scenes ugh so good yeah yeah everyone knew it would be a trip

rly cannot stress enough what a Direction this sure was. i dont like say it as crit necessarily just like. did they over extend. maybe. they sure Extended. i would expect this maybe for a third movie not a second but they were clearly trying to blow the first one out of the water. it was just.. a lot looser. it needed to be tighter. i dont know what theyre planning for the 3rd movie but i really did not like. vibe with that ending decision

they changed peni’s design slightly and gave her a cooler mech so thats nice. maybe they listened 2 criticisms abt that

i cant decide how i feel abt a lot of the dialogue tbh it rly wasnt my thing a lot of the time like. the changing writers were kind of.. obvious. and there was a LOT of dialogue bcuz this movies purpose seems to be a very Character Driven story to prepare for the next? like theyre TRYING to say stuff thats for sure. also it was rly quippy in a way that i feel has gotten kind of tired with dialogue writing like SOME dialogue was genuinely funny and good to me like i wouldnt say it was BAD or something (some of it was bad.) it was just.. noticeably different? the tone for this movie was changed from the first which again isnt bad youre telling a different story it was just Different yeah. some things i rly thought couldve been handled like with more subtlety.

i guess we only had one movie with the original cast but some stuff just like i personally was sitting there trying to figure out if it felt in character or not. its rly hard to explain if u havent watched it i think and maybe im just crazy i dunno. im absolutely not opposed to making ur characters fuck up and make mistakes but like. huh. i guess. i would not expect otherwise from gwen bcuz shes a teenager but i was.. surprised that peter was going along with it like ? hes a middle aged man lol he wasnt like taken advantage of or manipulated in any way. not like they were trying to say that w the like spider group anyway, like i dont think they were tryingto say gwen was necessariyl taken advantage of or anything, like they werent trying to make them read as ‘evil’ if anything just like wow these ppl sure have Problems they are going thruogh. but like still? im not invested in peters character even it just felt kind of weird. miles went fucking through it too like jesus christ im still trying to wrap my brain around all this it sure does feel like theyre putting these ppl thru comic book trauma

what i went through emotionally wheni realized they were going to do Dark Miles i dont even mean that as criticism or anything its just a bold move man. buti was sitting there like yeah of course they would. hope they make it work

i dunno i probably have more thoughts im just kind of like sitting here lol like what a weird decision. if they hadnt ended it like that i probably would have my thoughts more tied together bcuz the movie itself wasnt tied up?? so its kind of hard to even like think through everything on one watch

#spiderverse 2 spoilers #itsv 2 spoilers #atsv spoilers #idk what tags ppl use #spiderverse

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autisticempathydaemon · 1 year

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For the redacted match ups!! Thank you ily no rush!! <333

The song I’m fixated on right now is probably Saturn by Sleeping At Last! “With shortness of breath / You explained the infinite / And how rare and beautiful it is to even exist / I couldn't help but ask for you to say it all again / I tried to write it down, but I could never find a pen / I'd give anything to hear you say it one more time / That the universe was made just to be seen by my eyes”

I’m an enneagram 5w4! I can never decide my mbti, something along the lines of istp or intp or entp but not estp ??? This plagues me

I love love love big youtube video essays, I’m not sure if i can pick a specific favorite!! They’re pretty much all I watch if that helps, and I have a lean toward informational ones— like, about real world events and history rather than about media— although certain media ones are really good too.

My imaginary friend’s name was Nobody. Like.. genuinely thats what i called him. I knew he wasn’t real but i felt left out ‘cause everyone else had one so when people were around I would pretend i had an imaginary friend. An imaginary imaginary friend named Nobody. He had a family too; his siblings were named Somebody and Everybody. Hell yeah

My go to way to fall asleep is in a sea of pillows (they keep my bones in place), big puffy comforter thats too big for my bed, window open, listening to podcasts til like 3am (or whenever sleep happens)

I have changed my name, and I picked it because it shares a nickname with my birth name and has the same initial— an easier transition for everyone else, they could just say my nickname if they didn’t want to say my new one. It even sounds similar. I do like the name, but it beat the other options because of that.

The first one that comes to mind as my favorite is the video where Sam heals Darlin (Vampire Tends To Your Injuries)— it was the first one I listened to and easily the one I’ve listened to the most. I’m a whore for hurt/comfort and that specific energy was too good, the mutual care and growing trust without strings attached, waaaah. I’m also really fond of the one where Avior helps Starlight sleep (Comforted By Your Demon) and the imperium one Specifically when Milo is talking to Asher about David (the beginning of Cataclysm: Last Wish) and the pain in the acting its SO GOOD. Probably my favorite bit of acting specifically from the channel, and the only scene thats made me cry. I just love when characters let down their walls and are vulnerable with each other its real good

The redacted boy who holds no appeal to me… im so sorry its caelum im so sorry it gets worse its not just caelum its huxley too i dont think i have a good reason theyre too nice and as for caelum i have a small brother i cant take any more

“Tell me about that one book/movie/tv show you know all the words to.” Don’t say that you dont know what youre getting into. Its the entire warrior cats franchise and im ending the conversation here before i start (more socially acceptable answer: The Song of Achilles)

Hmmm I’d love to be best friends with James!!

When im tired i will usually go off about whatever random problem im concerned about that day, my most common recently is my rage about leopard print vs cheetah print WHY IS THE CHEETAH GIRLS LOGOS AND STUFF LEOPARD PRINT. THE CHEETAH. GIRLS. WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK LEOPARD PRINT IS CHEETAH??? THEY LOOK DIFFERENT??? WHATS GOING ON???

Gas station snack and drink combo is usually green tea, I dont often get snacks there so im like trying so hard to figure out what id get or whats there… oo pretzels maybe

I cant tell you about my favorite playlist because i have one (1) playlist ive had since i was 14 and its just everything ive ever listened to ever, if im in a specific mood ill usually just look up the artist, recently its been a lot of Sleeping at Last and Novo Amor

I have no guilty pleasures im unapologetically me babey (its webkinz) (not the site Just the plushies) (best plushies and im very right about this)

Im sleepy and i love my cat and i would very much like to just cuddle that dang thing all day but alas, society calls. Despite this im a workaholic and not being on my feet at all times getting stuff done stresses me out in a major way— cant be stressed if im asleep, though!:D Also i eat raw potatoes on the regular (easy 2 prepare just take it out the cupboard pop it in ur mouth bb) and recently have started putting peas in my water boba style (or perhaps like a duck?) because i dont like water but i do like frozen peas and in this situation like 1 in 10 sips Theres A Dang Pea In There! This method has gotten me to drink more water than i have in probably years

You know who would know what they’re getting into and would love it? Ollie, who was definitely a Warrior Cats kid.

You say that you’re a workaholic, and Type Fives are characterized by their capability and competency… and yet, I get really fun, goofball vibes from you that I think Ollie would really love and get along with.

You’re both hard workers, curious, and diligent, but at home, you could be chill and just be with each other, be yourselves with each other. You with your Webkinz and your Warrior Cats and him with his Star Trek- it’s a lovely, comfortable home you have that’s utterly unique to the both of you.

Coming home everyday would be a delight, a reward after a long day of work. Ollie’d grab takeout on the way, orange chicken for him and whatever’s your favorite, and he’d settle in for the night, chopsticks in hand, saying “tell me about the difference between leopard and cheetah print, Babe.”

Song:

They say in Heaven, love comes first/ We'll make Heaven a place on Earth/ Ooh, Heaven is a place on Earth

Ollie strikes me as the kind of dude who loves cheesy, 80’s pop; like, I can see him busting through the door with the aforementioned takeout and just bopping. It’s also just a really cute song about the person you love and the space you make together being Heaven, and I love that for y’all.

Runner-Ups:

I like Avior for you on an Enneagram basis; along with the competency and capability, there’s a dogged curiosity there that, I think, Avior would admire and would keep him on his toes. Regulus is purely because of the imaginary friend tidbit; there’d be something poetic about him taking place of your Nobody and making himself your real imaginary friend. I could totally do something with that.

Note: thank for you the Sleeping At Last song rec~ I love his whole Enneagram album, so I’ve been meaning to get into more of his discography 🧡

Want a match-up of your own? Read this post, and tell me about yourself! 💌

#redactedasmr #redactedverse #redacted asmr #redactedaudio #redacted audio #redacted #busybee matches

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edalynn · 1 year

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huntlow shippers will see you talk about how you dont like huntlow and spam you with hundreds of messages explaining the same few screenshots of them standing next to each other and how you're spoiling everyones fun by "hating something cute for no reason." so you look at the "evidence" and point out why it's faulty and also explain why you personally don't think the ship is cute and how ppl mischaracterize both of them (especially willow and we know why).

and also you decide maybe youre being too harsh on what are probably middle schoolers so you try to look at the ship in good faith and point out the problems with a potential huntlow dynamic and how the ship can be explored to give them both character development. but then the same shippers spam you again accusing you of "ruining the fun" because you can't even portray a relationship that isn't 100% saccharine and conflict free nowadays apparently.

so you eventually explain why you don't see enough canon material to get attached to the ship and how ppl who like the ship really mischaracterize hunter and willow, using some really sexist/racist tropes sometimes. and it's because of the toxic fans that you don't like the ships now and especially their portrayal in fandom.

and then the same shippers spam you with the same 8 screenshots of them standing next to each other and basically proselytize about how "its definitely gonna be canon stop complaining." and they tell you youre entitled to your preferences but also they will not stop repeating their points until you agree with them that yes it will be canon and yes you actually like the ship now haha please go away!

because if you dislike a thing they personally like then obviously YOU are the stupid idiot who doesn't understand WHY the thing is good and THEY definitely don't need to reflect on if the reasons they like the thing is short-sighted or even harmful. or if its just a difference of preference for what at the end of the day is a ship between two teenagers that are not real. and if you're not getting it then it's their duty to make you see reason. obviously.

oh and then you look at their blog to see wtf kind of person is spamming you and theyre always. like. twenty five years old

I just went through such a specific, extremely vivid scenario, I feel like I need to lay on the floor for a while and rethink my life lmao. Because you are 10000% fucking right. Every argument, every conversation, every ask pans out exactly like this, almost word for word give or take a few points. It' so telling how they all have the same responses and same patterns. Like, there's nothing I can even add to this ask, that's just exactly how it fucking goes and its embarrassing. I want to say at least be original at this point, but they clearly don't care enough to given they don't give half of a thought to our reasons why we dislike it. H/L shippers all share one braincell that they pass around based on who's sending the angry anons which day, but the braincell is the size of a pea anyway so it doesn't even matter. Critial thinking skills: -2000. This ask is just too perfect, I can't even touch it anymore to give my opinion because you already said everything lmao

#asks #taako talks #toh #the owl house #huntl0w negative

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hi-there-cake · 10 months

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do u have anythingf u want to say about ghost eyes so farrrR????

hm!!! i think its very inch resting!! there are some parts i dont like (emilio is. Like That without pills + carmello’s whole deal seeming unrealistic like when he stops bullying rudy after rudy pleads and his crush gets a hold of him (though i still need to read more of it!!) but otherwise i like it a lot! it feels a bit like a case study almost both due to being “uncensored” as well as the either intentional or unintentional themes. i like how pobodys nerfect in this story, like lots of them are just kind of dicks but in the end theyre still good people. expectations are kind of toyed with like when yfirst meet luther you think hes going to be one of those . stereotypical abusive angry uncles(IM SO SORRY LUTHER) BUT HES NOT!!! despite or even because of the way he is hes one of the most positive influences in tobias’s life ever. or rudy seeming sweet (he is) but theres always that undercurrent of him being sharper than he seems to be. i say sharper not as an allegory for smartness but like in tobias’s analogy- a cupcake but with needles inside. sweet but it can hurt. rudy is also interesting just for how he plays with the idea of being kind? like hes kind and he cares for others but hes not a doormat. he has self respect and will stop being friends with someone if they continue to hurt him (at least thats what i think so far). part of the way he is being in part due to ben and his experiences is very smart like. that Seems like it should be character writing 101 past being important but like. i guess i dont see it much (<- guy who is a botw fan and does not often read other media, i guess it feels like the past of other characters besides the main characters isnt really developed. though rudy is technically a main character but not The main charscyer. i could be very wrong however. the detail about the horror movies is something i like to see (not for rudy but as a writing detail). tobias being naive and opening up more/caring for others the more hes at school is so nice to me. that feels #real, and tobias learning and growing is just fun to see. the advocacy for rebelling with luther is my favorite part i think like YES KING ROB A BANK!!! LIFE IS YOUR OYSTER!!! and the life is your oyster despite the circumstances also feels a bit like a theme, what with tobias breaking the cycle of being totally sheltered as well as possibly being able to save himself from the edburt cycle. also i do like how misunderstandings arent played so… dramatically i guess? like when edburt takes control of tobias and says Shit to rudy and tobias breaks free instead of like. acting betrayed and trying to run from tobias/whatever is common with misunderstandings hes still there for tobias, for worse and for better. he still invites him to go to halloween and tobias is able to explain why he talked to carmello. he didnt mention edburt which is. understandable but worries me for their friendship but they were still there for each other. this is all surface level stuff im sure but it feels impactful. like a well written psa about friendship and instead of the problem being something like. small like “i forgor it was their birthday” youre actually a dick but you can still make it up to them (tbf i do also like psas like that (pokemon) but this isnt targeted for kids. its trying to get a very real message out there). at the same time it also doesnt tolerate abuse and shows the side effects of said abuse, as well as showing abuse that doesnt Seem major but still affects the person all the same (ben and rudy to me). dissing christianity like that is so based. it also shows how abusers are people all the same but it doesnt excuse their actions (ben). edburt having lore and metatext Reasons is very cool to me, like edburt himself is a metaphor in my eyes for. well i would say suppressing yourself and the consequences thereof but i dont think thats Really It. idk that scene of toby and rudy together before edburt comes for him means Something i just dont know what yet. its also interesting how emilio calls toby “a perfect creature” despite tobias

being . Like That (though its not his fault). i also dont know what that means but it means something especially with the pobodys nerfect notion. i wish i could say more but i dunno what else to say. well simons theology is very based. yeah Man i really do wish i could say more…….

#HI DEX THANK UOU!!!#i wish i could do a deeper analysis but i!! dont have the capacity to do that methinks #anyways gjost eyes is cool

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verdantmeadows · 1 year

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if your blog got termed for spam its probably automated and not a personal attack, and half a month is typical/reasonable wait time for customer support to get back to you considering the company size/userbase. keep in mind, they probably have a BUNCH of other tickets/other users to look at FIRST. think about the 14 days they spent NOT paying attention to your ticket, they mustve been helping the maybe hundreds of other users inbetween that time. remember, there are millions of tumblr users and a fraction of that is sending tickets... and there are different levels of importance and urgency when it comes to customer support tickets. theyre literally only human and can only help so many people in such a short time. and, of course theyd have no warning, if they think you're spam then it'd likely be automated (if you werent reported), AKA, that IS the thing they're doing to prevent bots by terminating those with certain characteristics, just targetting actual users (lol oops). if youre a computer program, and a user exhibits behavior that's similar to a spam bot, then it's all fair game; it's not like it can distinguish between a real user who, for example, might be excited for and post frequently about a particular topic, and spam, it's not a real life human looking at it, and computer programs are bound to have errors. sure its annoying for it to have inaccuracies but its the nature of computing. its important to note that changes implemented are sometimes just TEMPORARY CHANGES, just testing features out, and not permanent, if you have any complaints or suggestions, go to @wip on mondays or send a DM to @humans or send in a suggestion ticket, because they can ACTUALLY at least TRY to help you. be nice to them though. remember, tumblr is a company, but theyre made of humans and can only do so much in a certain amount of time. finite level of resources.

Genuinely zero offense, I am unable to read all this because this is a long block of text so I'm going to skim

I already got my account unterminated. I did all those things and was very polite and kind to all the people I engaged with. It took me ages to get it back. The problem is it shouldn't have happened out in the first place. I was autoflagged as spam, yeah, so I should have had just had to do a some sort of verification. And besides that, I was just flagged because I used a VPN, which is ridiculous.

I did not get flagged for posting a lot. I got flagged for something absolutely normal in which I had no way of rectifying before termination without warning.

I'm aware of how many tickets there are. It's still ridiculous. I spent at least two weeks waiting. And then I emailed them from an alternate email and they responded immediately. I'm not stupid. The way you're talking to me makes me feel stupid. I know how these things work. I'm not stupid. I'm not an inconsiderate asshole.

And literally none of this applies to me because I didn't get terminated for those reasons. I was terminated for spam detection, not true genuine spam.

If their spam detection is terminating real people because I am NOT the only person this has happened to, then their spam detection sucks and their steps they're taking are half assed.

If you see this please let me know if I misunderstood anything because again I could only skim this message. But I feel like you are explaining a lot of things to me that I already knew and I feel like I am being treated stupid.

I hope my tone doesn't sound angry or upset at you. I am not. I appreciate that you are trying to tell me things and I think that this message is in good faith and intended to be kind

I think you are probably not trying to make me feel that way in which case I apologize if I sound pouty or defensive HFKSHFJKSF

But I promise I was very polite and nice to everyone who helped me. I didn't elaborate in tags because I didn't feel the need to. But like trust me I contacted everyone I could. And they didn't respond until I emailed them from alternate emails. And then they responded almost immediately. So there's dissonance in their help of individuals.

#asks #anonymous

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dissidiacloudstrife · 2 years

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☕ on molly. I dont go here, but I wanna hear your thoughts!

oh my god, of all things, ill have to explain somethings from the campaign! my thoughts on molly are kinda all over the place! since we never got to fully explore who he was in the campaign, as he died, a lot of what i think of is his impact, and if he came back alive. the M9 obviously loved molly, and his death really solidified becoming a group and family to each other, and it even kept them traveling with lucien for a while. (lucien was the original person, and molly was who woke up after lucien died. molly then died, and lucien was revived later. can you tell why theyre my favorites?) we learn later that molly was supposed to be a person without a soul really, what do you get? but it seems like the answer was just "someone without memories" and who are we as people, without our memories? and kingsly solidifies that! he has no memories, just vague past Vibes. i love talking about molly, lucien and kingsly (the person who they become after theyre able to save the body, bc he has no memories) the most because theyre just Identity Issues out the ASS and i LOVE working through that.

something i like to talk about with people tho about them is that molly gets softer. because i think when lucien gets revived, molly isnt "gone" in the typical sense, and is actually still their in his consciousness. in the end fights with lucien we see he has trouble keeping control of his body. i think molly realizes what happened with lucien bc what else can you do but talk with your weird doppleganger about his life? and molly realizes that it doesnt matter that lucien was "the chosen one", anyone could have picked up that book and been "the chosen one", lucien was just being used.

i want to think molly got softer because he wants to help lucien to some degree, that "leave everyplace better than how you found" coming into play! and its not like molly could hit the bricks in a sense here, he had no where else to go, he was stuck here, with lucien. and he was gonna make that lucien's problem, but also realizing that lucien was getting played?? bro.

a lot of what i wanna write about with molly is more of a softer "and thereafter" of molly and lucien returning and they have to figure out "what next?" bc neither of them thought they were gonna return to living again lmao.

basically molly is free real state bc hes like 3 fucked up people in 1, and we never really got to see him develop either! so i just kinda latched onto his need to try and help people and how he sees the world to explore who he is, instead of his more.....Hit DA BRICKS, IF IT AINT WORKING!

#im now realize i have so many fucking thoughts #if this gets in the tags im sorry #one of my first full animations is about molly and lucien!#a lot of my first animatics are about all three lmao #this might be hard to understand if you dont know about the second campaign but ty for asking!#this is more scattered bc i honestly have never talked about molly except to like 3 people lmao #were also going over like a 3 year campaign so forgive me

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writingonsaturn · 3 years

Text

Better Unsaid

a/n okay this has been all over the place!! it was originally going to be a blurb and darker and closer to smutty (so keep your eyes out for that??? lol), but then I made it softer and the concept got away from me and it got soooo much longer than expected lmao and i still dont love where it ended so maybe part 2?? i have the idea i just dont know lol

summary: Reader is a princess and Anakin has been her guard during the most public season for the past two years (not the most logical thing but just go with it lol, it gets explained better in the fic) and after a near death experience the two are conveniently forced into a....

ONE BED TROPE ONE BED TROPE *cough cough* ONE BED TROPE WITH ONE PERSON HAVING TO WAKE UP THE OTHER BC THEYRE HAVING A NIGHTMARE,, :)))))))

His smugness is the only thing about him I can consider ‘ugly’. And because I am so desperate to not have feeling for Anakin, the Jedi who has been assigned to protect me through coronation season (which lasts for most of winter), for the last two coronation seasons, I hold onto my distaste for that side of him. Which is why I suppress my laugh as he waits for my reaction with that confident smile.

“Come on, that was funny.”

Rolling my eyes, I let myself sit on my bed. I can’t tell if he’s actually funny or if my evening has been so boring that his sense of humor has started to become appealing to me due to comparison. In short, the suitor I was forced to spend an entire evening with lacked personality so much I’m starting to find Anakin funny.

“You’re much more entertaining than this evening’s suitor.”

Anakin’s expression shifts slightly, his assured grin dropping slightly. “Another miss?”

“You have no idea.” I relax slightly, taking a moment to be glad that I completed my father’s request and now I can just enjoy the time I have with Anakin. “I know my father’s desperate to make sure my marriage is useful for our people and that he worries about this selection process because he always thought my mother would be here to help, but sometimes I wish he wouldn’t rush it so much. It feels like all he wants me for is to marry me off in exchange of finance or weaponry or something diplomatic.”

“You’re more than that.” His response is so soft I think I might have missed it if I needed it less. I curse myself for feeling so validated by him. His words shouldn’t mean anything to me. After all, he could easily just be saying that because agreeing with my father will just make me more unpleasant to be around.

I smile politely while avoiding his eyes. I keep my hands on either side of me, fighting the urge to fidget. “Thank you, Anakin.” My words sound weak in my own ears, so I’m sure he notices my shift in mood. “I’m tired today, I think I’m going to go to bed early.” Normally, I’d be able to shrug off these kinds of things, but the beginning of Coronation Season makes me irritable. The anniversary of my mother’s death hits me harder each year.

“Y/n.” My name comes out so velvety I can’t find it in myself to interrupt him. “You are more than someone meant to be used as some kind of royal currency, and I mean that as more than just a...friend.”

I let his last word linger. We’ve tried so many titles that never seem to fit right. He’s the chosen one, one of the most powerful Jedi to exist, and the Jedi assigned to protect me each Coronation Season because that’s when my mother was assassinated. He’s my guard, but we’ve spent too many nights laughing together and talking about everything and anything. And I guess now he’s my friend, even though sometimes when he looks at me in a certain way or sits too close to me or reaches for my hand to guide me somewhere I can’t breathe right.

“Anakin, you know I love when you’re here, even though sometimes you drive me insane. And I appreciate your kindness, but your words can’t change the truth. That’s how my father sees me and he’s not exactly wrong. I’m not a son, I haven’t been raised to lead an army or lead much, and--”

“I’ve seen you in meeting after meeting, convention after convention. I’ve witnessed the way you handle real problems and I know how you care about your people. You’d make a great leader, you don’t need a husband to be valuable.”

My chest swells, feelings I never let myself think about mixing with thoughts of Anakin that I’ve spent so long trying to avoid. “That settles it, you’re my favorite person.”

He grins, the look warm enough to melt the odd lump in my throat. I fight down a smile as he steps forward. “And I wasn’t before?”

“I take it back--your head’s big enough without the additional praise.”

Rolling my eyes, I lean back slightly in order to recreate the distance he so easily destroyed. “And I thought you had finally warmed up to me, princess.”

The use of my title makes me skeptical. The last time Anakin used it was when he was trying to ease me so that I’d walk around the palace garden so he had an excuse to do the same. It was beyond late and I was half asleep, but he had os much energy he was desperate and just needed to do one more thing. I felt bad that his schedule revolved so heavily around mine (and when he softens his eyes and says please, I’m left incapable of saying the word ‘no’) so I agreed.

“What do you want?”

Anakin dramatically clutches a hand over his heart. He throws his head back slightly as if he’s just taken a fatal blow. “When did you turn so cynical? I’ve been back for three days and I’m starting to believe you’re a different person now.”

Yeah...he’s definitely getting ready to ask for something that’s more trouble than it’s worth. Then again, everything with him seems to be worth it in some capacity. Even if it’s just that one smile he gets when he’s truly content and doesn’t think anyone’s looking.

“Mhm,” I mumble, still fighting a grin, “so you’re not going to ask me anything?”

His lips part slightly as he exhales. I watch the way his eyes narrow at my victorious expression. “I don’t have anything to ask of you, but I do have a small request. A request so small you won’t have to do anything but say yes.”

Suspicious. Too easy. “You’re unbelievable.”

“You just said I was your favorite person. Remember that.”

I’m too tired for his coyness. I’d rather him make his ridiculous request now so that I can be in bed within the hour. Though I can’t pretend I don’t normally feel better after letting him drag me along on whatever ‘adventure’ he just needed to complete while also not letting me out of his sight. I used to tell him that I wouldn’t tell anyone if I wasn’t under supervision for an hour or two a day, but he dismissed the idea immediately. That’s been the cornerstone of everything.

“What is it?”

He sighs once, tilting his head slightly. The way his eyes soften tells me he’s already won at least half the battle. “They still haven’t caught the attempted--” Anakin pauses, something behind his eyes darkening. I know what he’s remembering. Last night, an assassin had gotten closer than they ever had. I had almost been shot in the garden, Anakin had barely pushed me to the ground in time. A fact he’s been beating himself up for since, especially considering that no one has been able to find my attempted killer yet. “They were so close to you. They were within palace limits and they disappeared like they never existed. Who’s to say they don’t work here and are waiting for the next moment you’re exposed? Who’s to say they aren’t here tonight, waiting for me to retire for the night?”

I didn’t realize how my near death experience had been so personal to him. He, like everyone else, was beyond frantic after it happened. But my father put an end to verbal worry before it could truly begin. He said the best thing we could do was act like everything was fine as the assailant was searched for. Anakin hadn’t been particularly cheery after my father instructed the guards to focus their search on known enemies instead of prioritizing venting the staff closest to me. I comforted him as best as I could, but he didn’t feel like speaking about it and I had to worry about the suitor meeting my father wouldn’t let me cancel.

“Anakin, you’re right next door to me.” I have to fight the urge to reach for him. “I was fine because of you, and I will be fine because of you.”

He sighs once, his expression not easing. “And if the person is silent? The attacker could easily work in the palace, but no one wanted to direct the search inwards.” His words are more strained than I’ve ever heard them be. “I think it’d be smart for me to stay in here. I know you’ve refused having a guard stay in your room or outside your door, but...” Anakin sighs. “Your safety would be more assured.”

Him staying in my room? The only line I’ve ever been allowed to draw, and I’m actually considering letting that go. If he seemed even slightly less sad, I wouldn’t even consider it. It’s not a good idea. I’m already too attached to him. “Anakin--”

“I’d feel more assured.”

Damn him. Stupid, extremely sweet Anakin who makes saying no to him impossible. I stretch my arm forward, letting my hand squeezes his forearm gently. “There’s no reason to not feel assured.” He doesn’t ease, the cloudiness behind his eyes remains stubborn. “You’re still worried.” No reaction, the haze that’s taken him isn’t letting go. “Fine--but tell no one or my father is going to take to posting guards at my door every night.”

...I guess there are worse ways to spend a night. Which is kind of a problem since I’m trying to...enjoy Anakin less. Ugh, I even sound dumb in my head. “I promise, princess.”

Ugh, he’s adorable. “You’re intolerable.” I stand from he foot of my bed and pull back the covers on my bed. He doesn’t reply, something dark still playing for him. I watch him move to face the door. Wait--is he doing what I think he’s doing? “No, you’re not going to stand there all night. You need sleep.” He has the audacity to give me an annoyed look. “I already didn’t want to do this so now you have to listen to my conditions.”

He raises an eyebrow, his lips pressing together oddly. He’s trying to gauge something from my expression, perhaps he’s looking for buttons to press to get his way. I guess I look as stubborn as I feel because instead of arguing he just sits on the floor. What? I watch him cautiously, trying to figure out if this is some weird argument trick.

“What are you doing?”

“What you asked.”

And just like that I’ve put myself in a position that I will no doubt regret terribly the second common sense returns to me. There’s no way to deny that Anakin and I are closer than we probably should be. We’ve felt like friends first since the day we first met. I can’t think of any reason to not offer to let him sleep in my bed except those stupid budding feelings I refuse to label.

It’s not like I actually like him. I can’t--I’m going to be married to some nobleman and he’s prohibited from ever forming attachments. I’m not even sure if we’re allowed to be friends. Having actual feelings for him would be so, so pointless. It would just lead to heartache and the ruining of the one genuine relationship I have. I’m just a tiny bit confused right now because he’s objectively really attractive and he’s always there for me. Always there to make a joke after a particularly rough meeting. Always there to offer me a supportive smile. Always there to humble me when I teeter on acting like my father.

Anyone’s heart would flutter at that, so it doesn’t mean anything. And if it does, I need to squash any budding feelings now before I mess things up. Which is why I should keep him at arm’s length until I get it together. But is that fair to him? And what if doing that is making things worse? What if it’s just reinforcing the idea of having feelings?

This is ridiculous. I’m going to get over this if it kills me. It’s just a bed and it’s only sleeping. I’m meant to be able to lead an entire union and I can’t sleep next to someone and act normal?” “You don’t have to sleep on the floor.”

The second the words leave my mouth I regret it all. What’s wrong with me? Did I seriously think I’d be okay?

I hear his soft exhale, “I’ll be fine. I’ve slept in worse places than on your marble floor.”

His voice sounds so weighted I can’t help but feel bad for not noticing that he’s still bothered. Whether he’s upset about his near miss or the fact that my father didn’t take his advice, I don’t know. But something’s wrong. The easy thing to do would be to just let him sleep it off. The smart thing to do would be to leave him alone until tomorrow.

I think of all the times that I’ve been upset and Anakin had refused to let me go to sleep angry or sad or overwhelmed. “I know, but it’s really not a big deal. It’s not like we don’t know each other. I mean, last Coronation Season you buttoned me into more gowns than my handmaid. And I owe you for saving me from one of the worst suitors I’ve ever had.”

“I’m starting to think we need to develop some kind of signal.”

The tiny bit of lightness that’s returned to his voice makes all of my internal struggle feel worth it. “You always seem to know.”

“That’s because when you’re reaching your limit, that one line appears between your eyebrows.”

I didn’t realize I had such a tell. I try to remember the way that the suitor drawled on and on about how amazing he was and how he couldn’t wait for the day he had a bride to bear his children and plan (tedious) social events. My hand moves to my forehead, trying to feel the crease Anakin mentioned. Can everyone tell when I’m growing tired? Am I that transparent?

Anakin’s slight laugh steals my attention. He’s facing me again, his elbow holding his head up on the foot of my bed. “What are you doing?”

“I don’t--I don’t think i get a crease between my eyebrows when I’m irritated.”

I hear him stand. I don’t realize he’s approaching me until he’s so close I could touch him without even needing. to stretch. “No, when you’re irritated you raise your eyebrows slightly, because that’s when you’re at your most sarcastic.”

“Really?”

The corner of his mouth tugs upwards. “Just like that.” I force myself to keep my expression blank. “When you’re reaching your limit, your eyebrows crease here.” His finger taps the space between my brows so gently I almost don’t realize what he’s doing. “And when you’re trying not to laugh--which is often, because you refuse to admit that I’m funny--you press your lips together in a way that forms a dimple here.” The knuckle of his pointer finger brushes against the bottom of my cheek.

I bite my tongue to fight the warmth spreading across my face. “I didn’t realize i was so transparent.”

“I can’t always tell what you’re thinking.”

“I’ll take it.” Maybe if I was less tired, I’d argue a little more. “You know you’re not that difficult to read either.”

“Really?”

“Yes, I can tell when you’re just being stubborn for the sake of it. I can see it in your eyes and you’re doing it right now.”

His expression harshens slightly before softening. “Y/n--”

“I’m not wrong.”

He sighs once, stepping back. I watch him pace around my bed before taking a seat on the edge of my other side of the bed. “Are you happy now?”

“Happy that I won? Absolutely.”

Anakin halfheartedly glares at me. “Careful, add a crown and a robe that trails down a throne and I’d feel like I was speaking to your father.”

“Careful, another side comment like that and I’ll ‘accidentally’ kick you off the bed in the middle of the night.”

“Not if I kick you off the bed first.”

I trace a thoughtless pattern on the fabric of my bedsheets. “What are you? Twelve?”

“I’m older than you.”

“Barely.” I continue the thoughtless pattern tracing as I fight the sleep from my eyes. “Your comebacks are usually more creative than that.”

He exhales, relaxing slightly as he rests his back against a pillow. “I’m tired, like you claimed to be.” His eyes flutter slightly, a bit of his exhaustion showing. “Go to sleep.”

I should. I’m too old to think I can put off a tomorrow I don’t want by just staying up. This is stupid. I’m too old to think I can put off the anniversary of my mother’s death by going to bed. She had been taken from us on castle grounds, killed by a revolutionist who viewed my mother as a class traitor. I still remember the way she slumped to the ground, her blood staining the snow beneath her. I remember the way the guards were so busy chasing her killer no one thought to keep me away from the body.

“Y/n?”

I scratch the back of my arm in hopes of banishing my thoughts. “Yes?”

“You’re being quiet.”

“You said to go to sleep, that tends to be a quiet thing.”

I can feel his eyes on me. “Since when do you listen to me?” Not trusting myself to actually reply, I only offer him a hum of acknowledgement. “I know you’re not half asleep.”

Folding my hands on my lap, I avoid his gaze. “It’s tomorrow.”

I don’t know why I trust him to understand my vague response, but I do. His silence stretches over us like a thin blanket on a cold night. Maybe he doesn’t understand what I’m implying. I can always correct him tomorrow, when my eyelids are no longer as heavy as my heart. The more seconds that pass in total silence, the more I think that maybe he’s fallen asleep.

I wouldn’t be surprised, Anakin has seemed tired recently, like some additional weight he won’t share with anyone has been thrust onto his shoulders. A small part of me rolls in guilt. I need to be a better friend, just because I’m suddenly a little too aware of him doesn’t mean I can shrug him off and ignore him.

My hand almost flinches away from the feeling of something surprisingly warm touching my pinky. When I realize that it’s just Anakin and that the contact was probably accidental, I force myself to ease. It’s not like we’ve never touched before, I don’t understand why I’m making it weird. Sitting in my bed in the dark doesn’t change anything. His hand turns slightly, pressing into mine a little more assuredly. Biting my tongue, I turn my hand slightly, exposing my palm. And just like that, our fingers intertwine.

“She would have been proud of you.” His voice comes out so low I barely register the words.

The words shouldn’t mean much to me--he never knew my mother and has no way to know what she wanted me to be.--and yet I find comfort in them. I smile, turning my head towards him. “You didn’t even know her.”

He rolls his eyes slightly, relaxing further before squeezing my hand once. “Who wouldn’t be proud of you? You’re kind and smart and decent to be around when you’re not telling me what to do.”

My heart swells in my chest so much I’m surprised it doesn’t burst. Could he be cuter? “Yeah...now I’m sure you’re my favorite person.”

“Now you’re sure?”

The smugness in his voice has me rolling my eyes. “Don’t make me regret saying that.”

“Maybe in the morning,” he says easily, “now go to sleep. There’s nothing worse than escorting you from meeting to meeting while you’re tired.”

“I’m not that bad.” Even in this darkness, I can make out the way he raises an eyebrow. “Shut up--I’m going to sleep, but not because of you.”

He lets out a slight huff. “You’re impossible.”

The desire to respond to his comment is not enough for me to win the fight against the weight of my eyelids. The moment my eyes shut, I feel powerless to anything that isn’t sleep. I let myself fall into a weightless sleep, my only tether being the Anakin’s fingers around mine.

A distant noise yanks me from my sleep. I’m too drowsy to do anything but register the sound. I hear another similar...whine? cry? I can’t tell and I’m too asleep to figure it out. I almost fall asleep again, but a third distressed sound keeps me from it. I wipe my eyes lazily with the back of my hand as I try to sit up.

Squinting, I make out a figure on my bed. It takes me a moment to remember Anakin and how I fell asleep. Our hands are still together and no light is peering through my window so it can’t be that long since I fell asleep. Another disgruntled sound carries itself throughout the room. I shift slightly, leaning over Anakin cautiously.

Golden brown curls are beginning to stick to his forehead and his eyebrows are drawn together sharply. He’s having a nightmare. I shift even further forward before cautiously placing a hand on his shoulder before squeezing him gently.

“Anakin,” I whisper, “it’s not--it’s not real.” His eyebrows draw together even more harshly. I shake him a little more stubbornly. “Anakin, wake up--you’re having a ni--”

My forearm is grabbed so suddenly I barely register it before I feel my back shoved into my mattress. I blink twice. His dark eyes are frantic and the look on his face is far from the gentle, easygoing expression I’m used to. He’s breathing deeply, his chest rising and falling from above me. I swallow a slight panic and something I don’t understand as I try to keep my eyes on his face and my thoughts away from how close he is. Anakin pries his fingers from my forearm one by one until only his palm is touching me.

“Y/n, I--”

“It’s okay.” Honestly, I’m more worried about his uneven breathing than the way he grabbed me. I can’t imagine everything he’s been through or how justified his nightmares are. Anakin moves his hand away from me. I don’t sit up until he’s off of me and sitting with his back against my headboard. “It’s okay--I just--you were having a nightmare and I thought I should wake you.” He doesn’t react. I turn my body further, keeping my back straight. Anakin doesn’t move, and the longer he stays still, the more I feel like I should say something else. “Do you want talk about it? Or do--do you want to talk about something else? Or go to sleep? Or get some water? Or--” The far off look behind his eyes silences me. I scoot forward slightly. “You’re okay, Anakin, I promise.”

His head turns at that, his eyes searching mine for something I don’t understand. “I thought...” He cuts himself off by swallowing once.

I shift a little more, trying to find anything normal in his expression. “Thought what?”

Anakin’s hand is on my arm so quickly I don’t even register his movement. I let his fingers press into my skin. He’s holding onto me like I’m a figment of a dream and he’s beginning to wake up. “I thought I’d failed.” He exhales, the sound heavy. “Failed you and that you’d--I thought I had lost you.”

A lump rises in my throat, thick and unmoving. Cautiously, I place my hand over the one still gripping my shoulder like a lifeline. “You didn’t. Nothing happened, it was just a dream.”

His gaze falls to the ground before he repeats the last of my words. “Just a dream.” There’s a hollowness to his voice I don’t understand.

I exhale, carefully running my thumb over his knuckles. “Yes.” He doesn’t say anything but his expression hardens again. I let us sit there like that for a long minute. “I promise.”

“You can’t promise things like that.”

I sigh, unsure of where to go from here. “Bad dreams are only bad dreams.” He doesn’t reply. “I think you should try to get some more sleep.”

Anakin is unresponsive. I shift back, but before I can transition from almost being on top of him to just sitting next to him, he pulls on my arm to keep in place. “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.”

“Nothing’s going to happen to me.”

“You almost died today, y/n. I was right there and if I had been a second later--”

“But you weren’t.” He doesn’t ease. “You were there and I was fine. Don’t torment yourself over what could have been. You’ll drive yourself crazy.”

“If anything ever happened to y--”

“It’s not going to,” I whisper, ignoring the way his hold on my arm tightens even further, “Especially this time a year when I have a pretty good gau--”

He tilts his head slightly, eyebrows drawing together and a ghost of a smile on his lips. “Pretty good? Really?”

“Someone needs to watch your ego, chosen one.” This time when he tries for a smile, the look has some strength behind it. Relief pools in my stomach. “Now get some sleep, tomorrow’s a busy day and when you’re sleepy you’re beyond irritable.”

Anakin lets me pull away enough to lay down, but he doesn’t follow. Not for a long second. When he does, his movements are impossibly rigid. I watch him out of the corner of my eye as carefully as I can manage.

“Y/n?”

I regret turning my head immediately. I didn’t realize how close he was. It would take no effort from me to make our lips meet. Wait--why am I thinking of that? I’m not allowed to think of stuff like that...especially not about him.

“Yes?”

He lets out a breath before moving his hand. I don’t understand his hesitation until I feel his hand cupping my cheek gently. “What if next time I’m not enough? What if next time I lose you because I’m not strong enough?”

I never thought my death would be such a personal thing to him. Sure, I knew that we had some kind of bond, some kind of friendship, and that my death would bring sadness. But I never imagined I’d matter enough to him that thoughts of my death would be frightening enough to slip into his subconscious and become a thing of nightmares.

“You are enough. Nothing is going to happen to me and if it does it’s not going to be because of you.” Anakin’s lips press together in a way that implies serious uncertainty. His thumb brushes across my cheek so unexpectedly I almost ask him what he’s doing. The intensity behind his eyes is enough to burn me. “Was your dream really that bad?”

He lets out an uncertain breath as his eyebrows draw together. I don’t miss the way his jaw clenches. “It’s more than the dream. I...y/n, princess,” he tacts on, a hint of humor returning to him, “you’re more than a mission to me.”

The admission is so soft I can’t help but smile. “I know, Anakin, we’re--”

“You’re more than a friend to me.” I don’t know if my blood freezes in my veins or if my lungs don’t contract when they should or if my heart literally skips a beat, but I know something in me completely stops at his words. “I--”

“Don’t say it.” I don’t know how I managed to cut him off so sharply and I’m a little disappointed when I do, but it’s the right thing to do. Thought of the code that’s so important to him have clouded half the immense shock and joy swelling in my chest. “What you’re trying to say...I um, I want to say the same.” I try to drop my gaze but he tilts my head up slightly with his hand. “But we shouldn’t, you know that.”

"You want to us to pretend that nothing’s different? You want me to escort you from meetings with one suitor to the next every Coronation Season until you’re married off?”

“No, I’m not saying that. The point is that I’m not saying anything.” His eyebrows draw together in uncertainty. “Isn’t it enough for now, for both of us to just know? If we say it...that could mean bad things for you. And I don’t want to be a bad thing for you.”

“You could never be.”

It’d be so easy to believe him. To believe him and to let him say what I never imagined I’d be able to hear and damn the consequences of tomorrow. “Can we just refrain from verbally saying anything until you’re sure?”

“I’m sure right now. I’ve been sure since the first time we ever walked in the garden together. The night after the first Coronation Ball I escorted you to.”

I remember that night well. The way he hadn’t scolded me for needing air or taking off my uncomfortably high heels to walk in the grass. “If you mean it, you won’t say it yet. I refuse to get in the way of what you’re meant for.”

His thumb runs my cheek entirely, stopping at the corner of my mouth. “Are you capable of not disagreeing with me?”

Rolling my eyes slightly, I place my hand over his. “Probably not.”

Anakin exhales, his playful irritation clear in the sound. “You’re impossible when you’re tired.”

“I am not tired.”

“I can see the sleep in your eyes.”

“I can see it in yours too.”

He pauses, eyebrows drawn together cautiously. “I’ll go to sleep if you do.”

He must be more tired than I thought if he’s compromising with me so quickly. “Deal.”

Neither of us close our eyes for a long second, we just watch each other with wide eyes. It still doesn’t feel like he’s eased, but he’s come back to me so much more than he was earlier. I’ll make sure to check how he’s feeling in the morning. The first morning after we’ve...I don’t know.

I’m trying really hard not to get excited because anything that’s been not said could be taken back so easily. That’s the point--but it’s hard not to let my heart get ahead of my rationality. I’ll just take the good for what it is for now and tomorrow we can figure out the rest. Even though he’s not allowed to form attachments and my father really wants to marry me off to foreign royalty.

Tomorrow. This can begin to be solved tomorrow. My eyes shut and I let myself roll fully onto my back. The second I’m comfortably settled, I feel Anakin shift against the bed. I’m too tired to open my eyes until I feel a weight placed against my chest.

I open my eyes on instinct, less surprised than I should be when I see Anakin’s head resting against my chest. Before I can speak, I feel his arm rest against my side. “Anakin,” I breathe, my hand moving to smooth his hair out of his face the way I’ve wanted to for so long. “What did we just talk about?”

“You said not to say anything,” he mumbles comfortably, “I’m not saying anything.” ...It is kind of the ideal compromise. Especially since I’m too tired to find reason and he feels so warm. “I can feel you overthinking. Go back to smoothing my hair before I have to rise and stand at your door so that your handmaid comes to wake you. Something tells me she’d be glad for the excuse to get rid of me.”

That might be the most dramatic thing I’ve ever heard him say. Selma is the most patient woman in the palace. “Selma would never report anything involving me, I can’t believe you don’t like her. She’s the sweetest woman I’ve ever met.”

“She’s the one that doesn’t like me,” he says, “she always watches me like she’s trying to figure out if I’m planning on stealing you away.”

Too tired to fight my smile, I go back to smoothing his hair out with my fingers. After a moment, he lets out an exhale that relaxes his entire body. “Goodnight, princess.”

“Goodnight.” The word is barely a mumble as I feel sleep tug against me for the second time tonight.

It’s strange, but my excitement doesn’t diminish my tiredness, it just makes the prospect of rest feel so much fuller. Safer. Because there’s so much to sort out and grieve but it’s okay, because we have the time and everything feels okay because Anakin is here, right beneath my fingertips.

#anakin skywalker #anakin #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin x reader #anakin x you #anakin skywalker imagine #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker x y/n #star wars #star wars x reader #star wars imagine #star wars imagines #star wars fic

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whatdoyouwanttobecalled-1 · 3 years

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I've been seeing a lot of posts about this all over social media, and while the majority of them are fine and just people expressing their opinions, a lot of people from both sides of the argument have been saying some really inexcusable stuff (such as telling people on the opposing side to off themselves, etc) and it's really pissing me off. Pls everyone idc if you agree w me or not but at least try to be mature and respectful when engaging in these conversations bc the goal is learning, understanding, tolerance, and cooperation (working together to find solutions to problems that will benefit all of us). So here's my stance on the issue, and feel free to reply, ask questions, or dm me and start a conversation regardless of your veiws. Just be nice! Here's my opinions, based off my own personal experience:

To start off: pansexuality is not inherently biphobic and/or transphobic

Yes, there are pansexuals who are biphobic, and yes they harm the transgender community in that sense. This is because generally pansexuals who are biphobic say they bisexuals are transphobic and essentially invalidate binary trans people's identity as a man or woman by saying that bisexuals are only attracted to cis men and cis women, not trans people. However, the majority of pansexual people do not think this way. Personally (and most of the pansexuals as talked to agree w me), I do not believe that bisexuality is transphobic. Why? Trans women are women, and trans men are men. If you will not date a trans person simply bc they are trans, then you're transphobic, but that has absolutely nothing to do w your sexuality. My own and most people's understanding of bisexuality (and the definition you get if you Google it, and the definition that most bisexuals will give you), is that bisexuality means attraction to 2 or more genders (which yes, could mean all), with a preference. With. A. Preference. I identified as bi to myself for years, and came out as bi for almost a year, never feeling as if the label fully fit me or that I was fully understood by the community bc there is always sm emphasis on the fact that bisexuals have a preference, while I never have. I don't think anyone is less than anyone else for having a preference, or better than anyone else for not having a preference. Pansexuality simply allows me to be apart of a smaller more specific community that fully understands my experience w attraction. I also know that bisexuality can be used as an umbrella term for anyone attracted to 2+ genders, but in the same way that it's not biphobic for lesbians to prefer to date other lesbians bc of their shared experience, I like having a smaller community that specifically experiences attraction in the same way that I do. I've also seen a lot of people talking about how people seem to think that bisexuals only care about sex, and that pansexuals think theyre better bc they're uwu innocent babies. I'm not entirely sure I'm not on the ace spectrum somewhere but lemme tell you that does not make me any less of a whore. No one is better than anyone else for how much or little they think about or enjoy sex.

2nd; bisexuality is not inherently transphobic.

Yes, there are bisexuals who are transphobic, but this is not the majority of the community. Most bi people consider trans women to be real women (which they are) and trans men to be real men (which they are). I will say it again; if you won't date someone just bc they're trans, you are transphobic, but that has nothing to do w your sexuality. As for non binary people, yes, bisexuality includes them too. Bisexuality is not inherently transphobic.

3rd; all mspec labels are fucking valid.

Whether you identify as bisexual, pansexual, omnisexual, or polysexual, you are valid. You can use bisexuality as an umbrella term if that's what you're most comfortable w, or if the definition perfectly describes your relationship w attraction then that's cool too. If you feel that pansexuality, omnisexuality, or polysexuality better describes you and you enjoy having a smaller more specific community to fully relate to, guess what, that's also cool. No one is better than anyone else, and while there are members of every community who feel that they are, they do not represent everyone.

4th; panphobia/omniphobia/polyphobia only comes from the mspec community, if it comes from outside, it's probably biphobia

Let me explain; there is no problem that comes from people who are not attracted to multiple genders that everyone on this spectrum doesn't face. Bisexuality is a spectrum that we all fall on, an umbrella term that we all fit under. This means that unless it's coming from a person or group on this spectrum, it's probably biphobia you're facing. There are 2 types of biphobia: the biphobia that comes from mspecs, and the biphobia that comes from people who aren't on the spectrum of bisexuality. The biphobia that comes from inside is only against people who identify as bisexual, and the biphobia that comes from outside is against anyone who is attracted to multiple genders. I'm not saying there aren't a few instances of people who arent mspec targeting a specific group and not every mspec identity, but most of the time, if it's from the outside, it's classified as biphobia, bc that includes all of us.

In conclusion, this is what the mspec sexualities are and some of my final thoughts;

Bisexuality = attraction to 2+ genders with or without a preference. It can be used as an umbrella term by the whole mspec community, or as a specific label on it's own. It includes trans and non binary people, and is not a transphobic label. There are transphobic bisexuals, but the fact that they are transphobic and the fact that they are bisexual are not related in any way. They are not more or less than any other mspec identity, or sexuality in general.

Pansexuality = attraction to all genders without a preference. It is not biphobic and/or transphobic. There are biphobic and/or transphobic pansexuals but the fact that they are biphobic and/or transphobic is not related to their pansexuality. Many people who identify as bisexual describe their attraction in the same way as pansexuals. This is 100% valid as bisexuality can be used as an umbrella term and the label you identify w is all about your comfort. They are not more or less than any other mspec identity or sexuality in general.

Omnisexuality = attraction to all genders w a preference. It is not biphobic and/or transphobic. There are biphobic and/or transphobic omnisexuals but the fact that they are biphobic and/or transphobic is not related to their omnisexuality. Many people who identify as bisexual describe their attraction in the same way as omnisexuals. This is 100% valid as bisexuality can be used as an umbrella term and the label you identify w is all about your comfort. They are not more or less than any other mspec identity or sexuality in general.

Polysexuality = attraction to more than 2, but not all genders. It is not biphobic and/or transphobic. There are biphobic and/or transphobic polysexuals but the fact that they are biphobic and/or transphobic is not related to their polysexuality. Many people who identify as bisexual describe their attraction in the same way as polysexuals. This is 100% valid as bisexuality can be used as an umbrella term and the label you identify w is all about your comfort. They are not more or less than any other mspec identity or sexuality in general.

Honestly, I think we all get enough hate from inside and outside the lgbtqia+ community and we need to stick together and have each others backs. It's not the microlabels that are causing problems, it's the exclusionists. Invalidating eo's experiences and saying that biphobia is a bigger problem, panphobia is a bigger problem, omniphobia is a bigger problem, or polyphobia is a bigger problem, isn't gonna help anyone or solve anything. We can have slightly different experiences and still relate and support eo. Also, even if you have a problem w a specific label, pls just ask your questions genuinely, and try to understand the opposing side. Just have a mature conversation. If you're too young or immature to do that then you probably shouldn't be on social media. Calling eo names and telling eo to off ourselves isn't helping anything and there is no excuse for it. I've always loved the lgbtqia+ community for it's love and acceptance, but the more active I become within the community itself, the more I realise how toxic it can be. Sometimes I'm genuinely embarrassed to part of this community. Especially when it's grown adults acting like children that is causing the problems. Pls do better. Thank you for your time, thank you for reading, I love you, have a nice day!!!

Also I just want to add that ik there are more mspec identities than this, and you're all so valid. These are just the sexualities that ik enough about to give a proper statement on and the ones I've seen mentioned in this discourse the most. I'm actively trying to learn more about the mspec identities I mentioned, and those that I didn't. Pls feel free to give me any info on any sexuality (doesn't even have to be mspec I just want to learn more so I can be good ally for everyone), or ask me any questions about my own sexuality, and pls let me know if there is anything I should add or any misinformation in this post (I will not be including blatant blankphobia against any mspec identity so don't even try it bitches)

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