#and the reason that parallel sticks out to me is bc both are times the doctor has managed to cheat death; and he's praising his own power
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Do you think Tim and Lucy will get back together? If they do do you think it will be another secret dating era? If they get back together and he is still on patrol that would make him her direct supervisor again like he is now, do you think we would have a repeat of 5x12 or would they be able to date without one of them having to transfer? I think this time it should be Lucy changing jobs.
Do you think.Tim is actually going to get the help he needs? If he does do you think part of it is so that he can a better man for Lucy the kind that he thinks she deserves? Do you Lucy will get the help she needs? Sorry so many questions. Do you think the writers will go the route of having them date others before returning to each other or do you think it will be attempt #2 that will stick?
hi ♡ omg no pls bring ‘em all.
Do you think Tim and Lucy will get back together?
yes, 100%. there’s quite a few reasons why i think they will:
ngl, my favorite reason i talked about here but essentially the foreshadowing through parallels
aside from that, there’s a $$$ component. a big part of their viewership stems from chenford and they know this, they know what it means lol. to quote abril rodas: “that’s bad business” (to not get them back together) 😂
the tca interview where eric said lucy would “help bring out a lot of the best in tim to help him navigate that” — we haven’t seen this and even if it’s not lucy supporting him through this as a couple, i think it’s a step in the right direction. i think past the pain and shock and awkwardness of it all, lucy will worry and want to help when she sees how bad he's spiraling? that's who she is.
there’s far too many hints from the actors for it to be permanent like they all keep saying to have hope and that the finale will end at least with some resolution.
i am delulu and refuse to believe that five years of a slow burn ends here ✨ (i wanted to quote another character but i can't remember who said it lmao. but insert here that line about it not making a good ending to the story or something like that?)
If they do do you think it will be another secret dating era?
idk but i want it 👀
here’s the thing, there’s so much we missed in their secret dating era. like i want more of them sneaking around and almost getting caught, trying to play it off but others starting to catch on, the reaction of everyone finding out they’re back together! oh! and an actual betting pool that we see this time????
plus it has the potential to make sense, i think? because it could be that they’re sneaking around because they’re still testing the waters and trying to figure it out again before letting everyone know.
If they get back together and he is still on patrol that would make him her direct supervisor again like he is now, do you think we would have a repeat of 5x12 or would they be able to date without one of them having to transfer?
hmm, i’m not sure but you bring up an interesting point. i know eric said we wouldn’t see tim in metro uniform for a while and i thought that he was back in metro gear by the finale but he isn’t? which now makes me wonder if he ever will be? i have wonderings about this now lol. but anyway, i could see it going both ways? on one hand, i want to say it’d be a repeat of 5x12 bc its protocol but also, they’ve already been a couple before and worked together so idk what protocol is with that 🤷
however, looking back at the s6 finale bts — tim’s in patrol uniform and lucy’s not? so there may be a chance that regardless if they’re back together or not, lucy ends up moving out of patrol and does make detective? because it's odd that tim, aaron, and celina are all in uniform while lucy and angela are not? like the only other reason i could think of for lucy not being in uniform but still on patrol is that she was undercover and got made/tagged in somehow to whatever's gonna go down?
Do you think Tim is actually going to get the help he needs?
god, i hope so. this poor man has had so much trauma in one lifetime. he needs to heal, he needs a break. i think it was confirmed in an interview or at least alluded to that he does? aside from what we see in the 6x07 promo with sus therapist hopefully. there’s so much he’s holding onto that i don’t think he’s ever fully processed any of it like the majority of his life has been to be in survival mode?
If he does do you think part of it is so that he can a better man for Lucy the kind that he thinks she deserves?
yes and no. from how he broke up with her, i don’t see him going about getting help and healing for her, i think he’ll do it because he needs to. he needs to do it for himself, to heal from the scars he carries and forgive himself to see that he's worthy of so much. i think that would have been an entirely different conversation if he was gonna get help to be someone who he thinks lucy deserves. but i do believe he’ll become that person again though as a result from it.
Do you Lucy will get the help she needs?
i also really hope so. lucy bottles things just as much as tim does except she does a much better job at hiding it because she comes off as such an open book that you’d never know. i think the break up will be the tipping point? ngl, i'm struggling a little more to understand her storyline because it doesn't seem as clear. we know it'll be regarding her mental health but i thought it was going to be fully kicked off with the shooting and then it wasn't? so i'm guessing the break up might be the tipping point? because there's so much she also hasn't processed that she really does need to. i also hope she's able to see the support system she actually has because they keep isolating her and she's not alone but she feels alone which is only going to be magnified by tim walking away (and likely? tamara moving out).
Do you think the writers will go the route of having them date others before returning to each other or do you think it will be attempt #2 that will stick?
i don't think so, at least i hope not. i find it really hard to imagine either of them dating someone else because of why they broke up like they didn't stop loving each other: tim walked away because he thought he was doing what was best for her and lucy was literally grasping for him as he kissed her goodbye. the fact that they were joking about grandkids on their second date, nonchalantly discussing their own kids when they lost jordy, they were building a future with each other. how do you move on from that when you found the person you want to spend your life with? i think attempt #2 will be the one that sticks but i don't think it's going to be easy or quick, there's so much pain there and aside from breaking her heart he also broke her trust but because of it i do think they'll come back even stronger.
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https://www.tumblr.com/acoraxia/751189590385328128/i-do-want-to-like-macaque-but-the-way-the-only?source=share
I feel like this post is wrong, and not just bc I love macaque, just the shadowpeach relationship and the parallels they provide to other relationships and macaque parallels to other characters feels like such a vital part to lmk as a whole. But I'm not good at words, so asking for your imput
I don't want to, like, "gossip" behind anyone's back or anything, so I'll open this up to a discussion with @acoraxia! Hello, how are you, I hope you're having a good day.
(Here's the post if others are interested in readin' it!)
Now, I love Macaque, and I think he's one of the most important characters in the show. I presume "theater kid antics" is referring to Macaque's dramatic nature, but I'd hardly call that his defining characteristic. Macaque is a loser: he's spiteful, he's selfish, he's cowardly, he's paranoid, he's god awful at communication, he's obsessive (particularly over Wukong)...but we've also seen the ways he can put the world/others above himself (3x13, 3x14, 4x10, 4x14), and how he's capable of self-reflection and overcoming his past hurt/hatred ("Wukong was on a path of self-destruction...we all were"). We're, dare I say, at a point now where I'd even call Macaque reliable, in his own way. He'll show up for MK & Wukong, he'll "stick his neck out" for them, and I'm honestly so proud that he chose to stay till the end in 4x14 (versus his choice to run in 3x10). It's wild to me that he's the only 3 of the monkeys who has actually had a positive character arc, but that's just where we're at currently.
I think the claim that you could "remove him from the story and it wouldn’t change much" is greatly downplaying Macaque's role and importance to Wukong, both narratively/thematically and as a character. DBK and Wukong weren't close, but for Macaque, Wukong was his entire world. He (along with Wukong's fear of mortality) was the reason the great Monkey King reached for power in the first place. Both DBK and Azure had their own goals outside of Wukong (not that DBK particularly cared for SWK anyways)—what's important about Macaque as a character is that his motivation and loyalty was only for Wukong, and not towards any greater purpose or goal. Macaque and MK are very similar in that way: neither of them have lofty aspirations, and they are completely content with "quitting while they're ahead" ("Why didn't he just stop, right here? He was already so much stronger than anyone ever needed to be" ; "You're the one who wouldn't quit while we were ahead!"). Both hate change, and both have been hurt by their belief in Wukong.
I'm admittedly a bit...I guess confused, by this opinion, as entire episodes (1x09, 2x07, 3x04, 4x10, 4x11) are centered around Macaque and his relationship to both Wukong and MK. Macaque is there to show us the ways in which Wukong has both abandoned and hurt the ones he loves; he's a very important foil to both MK and Mei, as well as other characters like Azure. That's Monkie Kid's main theme right, the fact that you'll hurt your loved ones and they'll hurt you, but you love and care about them anyways (I have a whole tag around lmk's hurt/pain theme, for those interested).
Let's look at a few examples of this, particularly involving Macaque, Wukong, Mei, and MK:
Macaque: "Come on! Show me the real Sun Wukong! The old you would have leveled this whole mountain range to stop me, but you're scared of hurting some kid? Pathetic!"
(1x09 Macaque)
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Sun Wukong: "STOP! If you hurt that kid I'll-"
Macaque: "-What. Make things worse for MK?"
(3x09 The King, the Prince, and the Shadow)
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Mei: "Time and time again I've watched you put MK in danger leaving him to figure out EVERYTHING on his own. Don't you realize you're hurting the people who care about you the most?"
(3x10 The Samadhi Fire)
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MK: "Until I know what I am, what my destiny is? I can’t risk hurting the people I care about—the ones I have left."
(4x08 The Brotherhood)
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(the 3x10 and 4x08 ones are direct parallels in particular, which I know I never shut up about them, but they're so, so important to understand for the Monkey's (+ Mei) arcs.)
In seasons 3 and 4, both MK and LBD have posited that no matter what you do, whether or not what you think you're doing is right, it all leads "to pain". That's an extremely consistent thread throughout the entirety of the show, going as far back as 1x01 ("Whenever I try to do anything, I just gunk everything up!" -> "No matter what I do, it’s going to lead to pain [...] it doesn’t matter if I want to help people or not! Everything I do just- it just makes things worse!"). While Wukong never wanted to hurt his loved ones (for the sweet sweet "This isn't what I wanted!" Azure parallel), he did. He's a very flawed Monkey, but he does try and he has changed for the better, and that's what's important, right? That's something even Macaque has understood by the s4 special ("Monkey King really was a bad guy?" "That's what I believed...what Azure would have you believe. Then, he met him: the monk.")
You can't really...pawn-off Macaque's role onto other people. Structurally, we needed a tragic best-friend character who was deeply wounded by Wukong in the past, who has then come to accept/forgive him (for the most part, give-or-take). That way, you can have someone who has seen/experienced Wukong's flaws then defend him, both for MK's sake and in contrast to Azure having a literal world-ending breakdown over (his crush on) Wukong. DBK can't be that character, Azure can't be that character, and the Mayor is a much weaker antagonist for s3, unable to provoke MK + the main gang in quite the same way—as well as being completely removed from the themeing and Wukong's hero/warrior dynamic.
Macaque, as demonstrated in 2x07, views the "hero" as someone who leaves, someone who abandons their friends to the shadows. MK completely up ends that world-view in 3x10, refusing to abandon Mei "when she needs" him ("We're heroes! It's what we do!"). It's literally one of my favorite scenes in the whole show, and it completely hinges on Macaque being there and then leaving (much like Macaque's arc hinges on Mei being the fourth ring).
I'm just like...I personally can't imagine a version of lmk where Macaque isn't there to be a foil to both MK and Wukong. I rewatched Shadow Play just yesterday, and that episode is so delightful, let me tell you:
"Welcome, viewers, to a shadow play the likes of which have never been seen! It follows the tragic tale of a legendary Warrior, and how those who bring light into this world inevitably bring darkness to those they hold dear..."
Ah you mean like...hurting the people you care about the most, perchance.
2x07 parallels 4x02, especially between the shadow-lamp itself and the scroll—while Wukong's MIA, Macaque regales his memories of Wukong, imprisoning MK's friends and forcing MK to fight "dark" versions of them? Sound familiar?
(familiar tales...new adventures...)
Which, that's a bit of a tangent, but I do think it demonstrates the ways in which Macaque is important to the foundation of this story. MK and Wukong, Wukong and Macaque, MK and Mei...those are the core dynamics of the show for me, you know. If Macaque wasn't there, I quite honestly don't know where we'd be
#I didn't get into Wukong V Macaque mentoring but I also didn't feel like it. Maybe another time#this is reminding me that I need to write my Macaque and Tang parallels meta...#Cause I like them...#3x08 really did so much for us we should all talk about her more#also *cough* about to be salty here#for the love of GOD the Mayor was not an important character. He was there to support LBD#And he's even a nice Azure parallel. But he's not significant. You know the reason the Mayor didn't go after the gang in s3?#Because Macaque needed that screen time. Because that Monkey is what was important to focus on#(<- coming from a place of annoyance that the Mayor is more popular than LBD)#lmk#lego monkie kid#lmk theme: hurt#lmk meta#lmk Macaque#hero warrior motif#asks#anon#mark my words eventually Macaque will defend Wukong from MK. Mark my fucking words
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*vibrating intensely* hi please tell me your autistic Mickey headcanons I'm collecting them
ohhhh i have so many thoughts
ive already talked about this ad nauseum previously but i always have time to discuss my favorites autist
his hatred of sleeves is totally an autistic thing. he just hates sleeves, specifically anything thats not long sleeved or sleeveless
he seems to prefer warm weather. he bundles up sooo much in the winter and he talks about moving back to mexico in s11. he would rather go back to prison than move any more north than chicago
i am once again mentioning that compulsory heterosexuality is absolutely part of mickeys masking. he seems to not gaf about masking about a lot of "typical" autistic things like not understanding social cues/rules or lacking conversation skills. a lot of his masking is more survival based like seeming straight and masculine and tough
^ which makes sense that when he starts unmasking, he likes patterned/hawaiian shirts :') he loves how visually simulating they are and he can tolerate the sleeves bc the fabric is very breathable and light
he really likes loud sounds specifically loud music and ambient/outside sounds like the ones he looks up in s11 to help him fall asleep :) he seems like the kinda person who can only do one thing as once, ie cant listen to music and play video games at the same time. when he does something he has to Devote Himself To It. if hes listen to music thats what hes doing. hes gonna sit there with his giant ass headphones on and stim or just cover his eyes and focus on the lyrics. hes s natural loud talker. he could yell over a jet engine if he wanted to. altho he doesnt like people raising his voice at him for obvious reasons. he cant stand pure silence it makes his skin crawl. ian loves his peace and quiet so mickey often throws on his headphones for parallel play. ian cooks or reads his book in quiet and mickey listens to deftones or doomscrolls on tiktok. parallel play becomes a huuuuge part of their bonding as a married couple :)
when he gets overwhelmed he completely shuts everything out. he acts like a cornered animal and lashes out at anything even if someone is trying to help. he needs space until he calms down or he'll have a meltdown and start throwing/breaking things or causing physical harm. sometimes he becomes too overwhelmed too quickly and completely skips the "shutting everyone out" stage and go straight to getting physical
he stims a lot by hitting or throwing stuff so ian trains him to use soft things like pillows and plushies (he absolutely has a plushie collection) when stimming. i think he also hits himself on the head sometimes. :( (totally not projecting) but be mainly sticks to his regular stims like messing with his eyebrows, chewing his nails, and biting his lip. he has an oral fixation! ian gets him a chew necklace. he likes singing and dancing with ian tho hed never admit it. he likes flapping his hands and jumping but hes still too embarrassed to ever do them. he unconsciously sways and rocks, especially if hes in the same spot for a long time
ian absolutely buys mickeys most of his sensory/stimming shit. lights, weighted blanket, spinner ring, chew jewelry, peelable clear nail polish, bike chain (which we see mickey has on his bedside table in s5 so i 1000% believe this was his first stim toy!!!) toy, tangles, different types of plushies (squishmallow, squishables, jellycat, reversible octopus (mickeys fav they both have at least one for every possible emotion), plushie dreadfuls, palm pals, different shapes and textured fabrics.) ian often steals a lot of these plushies; they are their first children. after they move back to the southside and are doing some work on their house, ian notices mickey still needs the catharsis of breaking shit, so sometimes they go on dates to the junkyard with baseball bats and destroy shit together
mickey literally cant be in the same room with ian when he eats his eggs with ketchup. the concept itself is so gross he cant tolerate it
hes very sensory seeking, again partly because of his oral fixation. he likes spicy food and LOVES sour food. obviously he loves candy and junk food. they have lamps, other small lights, and color changing led lights all over their home. eventually they both fall into a routine of communicating nonverbally using different colors of lights
mickey isnt great at communicating verbally tho he tries. sometimes he just cant, its too overwhelming and he cant think of the words to properly express himself. hes much better at conveying his thoughts thru physical means. this is part autism, part learned during childhood
he learned literally everything he knows about society thru movies. he uses a lot of old slang and makes niche references. he refuses to explain any of them to ian
sometimes he goes nonverbal and he texts only using (sometimes too many) emojis and reaction images that nobody gets except him
most people think hes weird and dont get his sense of humor but ian thinks hes the funniest person on the planet! they often make references to inside jokes in front of other people and it annoys the shit out of everyone
ok i have to stop now or im gonna go on forever thank you for the ask
#flamingbluepanda#asks#shameless#autistic mickey my betrothed#long post#wall of text .#a.txt#mine#my writing#ian number 1 husband he has a shirt that says 'i love someone with autism' and mickey made a matching one that says 'im autism '#autistic!mickey#autistic headcanons
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🌈 2023 ✨
Another year is over so it's time for a look back at what was happening on this blog! I haven't really been around, it was just my queue, and maybe that's one reason why I looked at my archive and went "huh" at everything. I don't remember much. The other reason why this year probably went poof in my head is because I was dealing with some mental health stuff lol. I say lol but it wasn't actually very lol but I'm doing better now and 2024...is looking promising for now.
So, let's talk more under the cut, shall we?
January
We're in Bridgeport and Sawyer is living his best life. You know, girlfriends, boyfriends, being turned into a vampire, giving birth to three little vampires, threatening to sell his enemies' organs on the black market...best life indeed.
February
Okay I am now seeing that "talking more" about every month will be impossible since I actually don't have much recollection of 2023 lmao
March
Sawyer and Erin are at the best point of their relationship, but we left them alone for a bit and went back to NSB. Pastel just moved to Strangerville and got a...rather strange roommate.
April
The rather strange roommate becomes Pastel's rather strange wife. I love these two so much. We also say hello to Moss -- and also to Ross, who returns from...god knows where. I mean yeah, there was the ts3 Ross, but technically they're two different people. Parallel universes and stuff.
May
Thea is born and strange wife Jesse gets even stranger. That whole "merging with the mother plant" thing was kinda weird but I really enjoyed it. Idk what I was on but it was fun. And then, before returning to the lepacy, I posted my Cottage Living screenshots! ...which were really just me going "uwu what does this do" on every possible Wicked Whims option.
June
...and I went from posting weird WW Ross stuff to posting wholesome Growing Together Ross stuff. If that gave you a whiplash, I am sorry, but imagine what it must be like for me. I'm locked with this guy in my head 24/7. He's the whiplash king. A blorbo to you, a curse to me. A beloved curse tho. Ok I'm getting weird. Back to the lepacy.
July
Lepacy time! Loved the soap opera Generations gen. Kinda wish I had sticked to some of the storylines instead of going "eh nvm I just wanna play". I'm not saying I regret not actually letting Saywer go on a killing spree but also...imagine if he went on a killing spree. You don't see that in lepacies often do ya
August
August was...welp 💀 I was at the grippy socks hospital for most of that month, 10/10 would recommend, but my queue ran out while I was there so I just reblogged some old stuff for a few weeks.
September
September is just lepacy month. Cornelia and Archer are happy, they get married, they get more children...yeah. Good wholesome Generations times all around. It's not like they're gonna get divorced later or anything.
October
The twins are kind of chaotic, one of them turns into a ghost, both then bring their cursed imaginary friends to life...and the final child of Archer and Cornelia is born.
November
I loved running into Sawyer at the grocery store all the time. Weird vampire alleged killer grandpa behavior suits him. Dorothea goes away to a boarding school, hates it there and instantly comes back. Relatable. Oh and midlife crisis hits Archer hard.
December
And we're in December! Dorothea enters her horsegirl era and finds herself a girlfriend...and we'll continue that in 2024!
What's in store for the new year besides the lepacy? Well, Not So Berry will be making a return (and HOPEFULLY we'll finally get to the end. we need to). There's a story I want to do in the NSB universe, if you know you know. Before we dive into the next lepacy generation, I'm thinking of another BC with the gen 7 heir...oh and Marika's Black Widow. Shoot and I'm starting an irl job in January. Yeah no we're not doing all this in 2024, don't count on it 💀 But I'll try.
Happy New Year! 🎇
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Chess Allusions: Pawn Parallels
Rogers: “So you can use [her info] as leverage against [Belfrey]?”
Weaver: “Well that’s how this game works, Detective.”
Talking in the park, Weaver and Rogers both want the information that Tilly knows, the kind that causes Victoria to feel threatened, enough to blackmail Weaver with Tilly’s imprisonment and some CCTV footage of his misdeeds. Although both detectives covet finding and questioning Tilly for what she knows, their motives differ.
Weaver has a “means to an end” approach, valuing Tilly only when she can be useful in his schemes. His selfish nature sides with his freedom and power over her wellbeing, and he’s okay with that. Tilly might be his informant with the ‘best eyes and ears in Hyperion Heights’, but at the end of the day, she’s replaceable, someone worth losing if it means he gains a stepping stone in the long game against taking down Victoria Belfrey.
Rogers: “Is that all this girl is to you and Belfrey? A pawn? Then why don’t we split up, since one of us actually wants to help her?”
But to Rogers, who doesn’t even know Tilly at this point, he sees Victoria and Weaver’s game as something where people win at the expense of somebody else and goes into full papa bear mode. Rogers wants to help Weaver as a partner and wage justice against Victoria, but not at the cost of using Tilly. He sees Tilly as a vulnerable person caught in the crossfire of a game they didn’t even know they were playing, rather than a soldier in a chess match, and wants to talk to her on equal terms.
His opinion of Tilly being a bit off kilter but innocent at heart only strengthens when Weaver, in the hospital, unexpectedly pardons her of assumed criminal charges, telling Rogers an obvious lie about a masked robber being the one who shot the gun. Upon meeting Tilly outside of the hospital room, Rogers sees a confused, distraught, and guilt ridden young woman playing a game of chess alone. He tells her the facts with a kind opinion, “Look, you weren’t in your right frame of mind. He doesn’t blame you.” They build up an acquaintance and the budding start of a camaraderie over chess.
However, this all changes when the monster that is Gothel/the fire nation arrives Eloise Gardener gets into the playing field. Victoria and Drizella play cat and mouse, Weaver uses Tilly in a game of lies, and Rogers tries to make sense of things, inadvertently rescuing Gothel, the big bad spider.
Rogers to Weaver: You lied! And you made Tilly lie. Why did you do that?!
Weaver: Because you don't know what's going on around here... But I did it for one reason: to protect you from your bloody self.
(gratuitous physical violence scene bc I love the dynamic)
What Rumple could mean by ‘bloody self’ could be that Rogers lets his temper cloud his judgment first before he goes seeking revenge on/fighting for justice for those who deserve it most. I think that's where Rumple sees the most Killian come out from the supposed "Eagle Scout" detective, stubborn and determined to stick to his guns until he gets to his desired conclusion, which in this case is finding Eloise Gardener (Gothel).
Rogers defends Tilly, despite only meeting her a few times, going so far as to bodyslam Weaver as he confronts him. However, he loses his respect for her after finding Eloise, where no explanation could outweigh the cost.
Rogers: What do you want?
Tilly: To say I’m sorry about the page. Weaver said it was for the best and I can’t always figure that out for myself.
Rogers: Take a look at what he was covering up. Now tell me, was that for the best? You know what? I understand. I’m just disappointed. You weren’t the person I thought you were.
Rogers is a man of many things, holding grudges being one of them and being rational in the other. The blonde informant had gone so far as to even lie to him about Eloise, dead of all things. As much as he wanted to forgive Tilly, he didn’t know if he could.
At the end of the day, in Rogers’s mind, Eloise needed help, rescue, and emergency aid, something that only happened because of his deep obsession with finding a missing girl from a cold case. And Tilly deterred him from saving a life, unintentional or not.
Roni: “Henry told me about how Weaver used that girl, Tilly.”
Rogers: “Well, it seems to me like she wanted to be a pawn.”
Rogers feels his trust was betrayed and remains disappointed in Tilly. He saw Weaver being a shady bastard from a mile away, but he didn’t expect her to be complicit in Weaver’s dirty schemes. He wanted to believe Tilly was the kind of person who questioned whatever she was told and made her own path on decisions like he did, not so easily roped into following plans, especially ones of slimy bastards like Weaver. If Rogers saw Tilly as an innocent victim of society before, moved around like a pawn, he feels wronged in his judgment and probably thinks she was content to be a sheep to Weaver’s mysterious whims.
Who was he to believe she could be more than a pawn when she chose to be one?
Luckily, Roni was there to whack the obviously menacing poisoned cake from his hands and knock some sense into him.
Regina as Roni: “You know, people only let themselves be used when they don’t have any other option. How about you give her one?”
Tilly, even if a marmalade sandwich was needed as incentive, had been willingly helpful to his case. The only moment she hadn’t been was when she was under Weaver’s thumb, someone she had known and trusted like a father figure, unlike him who was a stranger in her eyes. People came and went from the older detective’s team, knowledge of informants and detective partners leaving frequently unless they had a special skill set or blackmail hanging over them. If anything, she wasn’t fully to blame.
What Tilly and Rogers can't see until it's too late, being cursed and all, is that they are good natured people afraid of getting hurt, wanting to help others, but unfortunately victims of manipulation, of those with ulterior agendas that use them as playing pieces, making them no better than pawns.
Roni was right. People like Tilly wouldn’t let themselves be used like pawns if they didn’t have any other option. She had been brave enough to show up to the crime scene to apologize to him in person after what she did, not caring about being forgiven, and he hadn’t even given what she had said a second thought. Knowing Weaver, Rogers would have concluded that the old bastard probably didn’t even give her the entire picture and used her good intentions in an ill manner befitting the man’s deceitful ways, leading her to think it was for the best.
This leads to Rogers making a step in the right direction. It doesn’t take more than Roni’s small nudge of advice to get him to internally forgive Tilly and go in search of her, eventually offering a chess set to help pass the time with a weekly game and a friend who’d listen if she’d accept. From then on, Rogers and Tilly both grow and begin to trust again, trying to protect the other from getting harmed as the consequence of another’s scheme.
#chess allusions#ouat meta#knightrook#detective rogers#detective weaver#ouat tilly#ouat s7#ouat 7x04#ouat 7x07#ouat 7x08#this stayed unedited in my drafts for too long#I'm starting to think belief and intent are powerful things
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bestie my bestie i have a chem lab due in an hour that i don't want to do. i would like to humbly ask for your miscellaneous thoughts on the hunger games pls rant to me i would love to see it <33
FRAMING THIS ON MY WALL FOREVER DEAR GODDDDDDDDD. EVEREST…. YAYYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!! SKIPPING IN A CIRCLE W YOU!!! ok :3 hehe
they make me sick in the head dear god. miscellaneous things abt hunger games that make me sick in the head this is not going to be organized btw.
thresh and katniss being parallels. both being older and non-careers that matched the careers' scores. katniss wishing she could play that stoicism like thresh because then she wouldn't have to act as much. katniss noting that she doesn't think that thresh likes owing people when he spares her for saving rue...... THEY MAKE ME SO SO SICK.
also rue and katniss and prim venn diagram.. katniss seeing herself AND prim in rue (mockingjay symbolism, eldest child, only 12 years old, named after plants, is the primary reason why katniss sticks so so true to her morals within the arena..)
gale. so many complex feelings abt him. like on one hand the way he took out his anger on katniss sucks!!! a lot!!!!! i dont think the way people discuss him is very fair either. he is still a child.. AND if we're working under the assumption that the people of the seam are intentionally indigenous-coded it feels a bit insidious the way people liken him to war and anger and shit like..... yeah gale operates from anger but it is ultimately an anger born from love and generational loss. like. gale deals with a lot of the same traumas that katniss deals with pre-74th games (losing a father, being parentified, being the primary provider for a family, watching children you grew up with die on screen every year, watching people die from disease and hunger, etc etc.) then during/post the hunger games he watched his best friend enter the games and enter an act he knows she has no agency in (and yeah theres jealousy there which. booooo but whatever he has flaws) while keeping his promise to care for her sibling and mother. THEN he is publicly tortured and watches as his home burns to the ground as the capitol attempts to commit a genocide against them, knowing full well that he wasn't able to warn the merchants town in time. i think people talk abt gale as if he's some big villain capable of holding a candle to snow when he's literally a kid whos been manipulated over and over again and led to believe that anger is the only fuel he needs. also. if im honest. im very hesitant with gale's character bc a lot of peoples criticisms of him as a person read a lot like people who believe revolutions should only ever be peaceful and that. is bullshit.
anyways. MADGE. :( I LOVE MADGE SO SO MUCH. she makes me sick she and katniss are a story of generational love. the fact that madge brings katniss the morphling because she cares for her.. the fact that madge brings katniss the pin in the first place!!! the fact that madge's aunt and katniss's mother were best friends!!! its a story of generational love!! IM SO SICK. DEAR GOD.
aro katniss hc :33 its real 2 me..
little rebellions found in small acts of love.. the three-finger salute first appearing when katniss volunteers in prim's place.. the fact that katniss volunteering at all was an unspoken rebellion bc it reinforced this idea of familial love and loyalty that the volunteer system was meant to break.. the salute being a sign of mourning as if to say district twelve will remember katniss's love..... the fact that the salute becomes this symbol of revolution.. katniss and rue bonding and exchanging tales from their districts breaking the separation each district has from the other, katniss laying rue to rest with a lullaby and a bed of flowers the capitol can't not show, district 11 in turn breaking those rules again by sending katniss bread as a token of thanks and solidarity.......... THE MOCKINGJAY PIN BEING KATNISS'S TOKEN THAT WAS GIVEN TO HER BY ONE OF HER ONLY FRIENDS. A PHYSICAL REMINDER THAT SHE WAS LOVED AT HOME. KILL ME. I NEED TO BE SHOT.
the way characters are explored through katniss and vice versa is so so interesting. i already mentioned thresh and gale but also notable are ofc haymitch, johanna, and peeta. all of which are intentionally similar to katniss in a way. (whether it be the all-consuming love and selflessness, the anger, the rebellion, holding on to stoicism as some form of protection, etc.) AND. the fact that so many characters butt heads with katniss because of this (AGAIN. HAYMITCH AND JOHANNA.)
katniss and buttercup. katniss's save the cat moment being her trying to drown the cat is so so telling both about katniss and about the world she lives in (this idea that death is some sort of salvation). buttercup being symbolic of katniss' relationship w herself (like cmon.. catnip. ok.) starting off with hating each other but only being amiable because they both love and want to protect prim, katniss saving buttercup literally only for prim (katniss intentionally wanting to come home for both prim and rue's sake), katniss lashing out at buttercup after prim has died, katniss and buttercup finding comfort in each other because prim is no longer there. their relationship shows katniss's evolution from living for prim to actually living for herself.
WHICH IS SO SO SICK. BECAUSE SHE ONLY LIVES FOR HERSELF WHEN SHE REACHES THE AGE OF ADULTHOOD. SHE HAS ONLY EVER LIVED FOR PRIM. AND EVERYONE KNOWS. JOHANNA MAKES KATNISS SWEAR ON HER MOTHER AND PRIM'S LIFE BECAUSE KATNISS DIDN'T VALUE HER OWN ENOUGH. THEY HAD TO MAKE SURE THAT KATNISS DIDN'T COMMIT SUICIDE SO SO SO MANY TIMES AFTER PRIM DIED. DEAR GODDDDD. SHES ONLY LIVED FOR PRIM.
katniss' relationship w her mother also makes me sick in the head. like mrs everdeen is not the best mom ever but the fact that she and katniss foil and parallel each other makes me so so so sick.. (katniss falling into that same depressive state her mother was in. the mockingjay pin. the seam vs merchants.. etc etc.) katniss and her motehr clearly care for each other too! her mother tries! she tries to make it up to katniss! she tries to care for her! and katniss lets her even if she doesnt like it because she knows its her mother's attempts and that means something! her mother holds her and comforts her and lets out a scream when she realizes that katniss has to be reaped again. katniss yells at her but she also grips her hand and tells her she loves her and lets the braid she wove into her hair be the signature she keeps.
ALSO SOBBING i wish we knew more about each districts individual cultures because we were given snippets of them (annie and finnick's wedding having particular district 4 customs, district 12 and their dances/music, district 11 with their music, etc etc).
also like while i stand by aro katniss 4eversies i do think that narratively peeta wouldve been the best romantic end game for her. basically what im saying is. katpee qpr. also her having children makes so much sense.
#suicide ment#thg#<- theres. a lot more in this tag.#i tried to make thsi a lot. smaller so i just wrote the ones from the top of my head.#everest tag#asks#anyways gl w your chem lab due bestie o7#i hope you. got it done seeing as you sent this like an hour ago jkhgfcfhvbj
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characters: Griffith, Otacon from Metal Gear, Adam and/or Amanda from Saw
VERY THANKS, a lotta my favs here
Griffith!
Sexuality headcanon: Gay
Otp: Guts, obvi
Brotp: 🤔 swinging a bit, a friendship with him and farnese would be interesting 😂
Notp: Casca I suppose, but honestly I don't know that I see him being romantically/sexually involved with anyone other than Guts
First headcanon that pops into my head: I don't know if it's very unique or anything, but I think in any other time period/world he'd be mostly pretty normal, in regards to his pursuit for power and whatnot.
Favorite line: I don't know that I can think of any of the top of my head. His conversation with Guts after the ball maybe 🤔
One way I relate to the character: gosh 🤔 I suppose I can be pretty distant to strangers and also most people initially. I would absolutely never fall in love with someone like guts but I def would still be obsessed forever if I was in his position
Thing that gives me second hand embarrassment: I don't know if embarrassment fits what negative emotions I ever feel for him
Cinnamon roll or problematic fav?: 😏
Otacon!
Sexuality headcanon: hmm harder to say, but honestly 🤔 probably Gay
Otp: snake!! Obviously, one of my top otps of all time
Brotp: I guess sniper wolf? I'm not too familiar with their in game interactions but it's kinda a funny looking friend group 😂 Oh and his sister, if she counts. And I'd love a world where he gets to know his mother more, would definitely be interesting 😂
Notp: 🤔 I'm not suuuper diametrically opposed to most ships for otacon but I also wouldn't really read any of them 😂 I guess sniper wolf 👍 OH Naomi 🤢 their canon dynamic is so 😑😑
First headcanon that pops into my head: Um. Sits uncomfortably in any chair? Breaks his glasses a lot
Favorite line: 🤔 His monologue with snake at the end of mgs4 makes me cry everytime
One way I relate to the character: Super fixating nerd 👍 I've also considered career paths based on my favorite media 😂 he's probably the closest any of these characters get to me
Thing that gives me second hand embarrassment: I mean I guess his first meeting with snake is pretty embarrassing but he honestly doesn't seem that embarrassed by it so 😂
Cinnamon roll or problematic fav?:
Gotta be Cinnamon roll, anything approaching problematic he's done has be incidental/under duress, and I really admire his commitment to righting his wrongs. Also, he's just a nice guy
I'll do both bc saw
Adam:
Sexuality headcanon: Gay! Duh...
Otp: I guess Lawrence, it's similar to my opinion on my otp for amanda, I don't know that I'm necessarily convinced by it, but their canon relationship/dynamic is interesting enough that I'll still read about it
Brotp: Amanda! Obvi... I'm much more convinced of their friendship vs his otp choice. They're like suuuper similar people, I think they're even set up in canon to be parallel characters, I think them being friends earlier could've really altered their lives...
Notp: amanda 😂 I can not even kinda see them romantically
First headcanon that pops into my head: Trans! Super get it, honestly I dig it when people headcanon anyone as trans in saw (for some reason it just really works). Also 🤔 Idk if it's canon or someone else headcanoned it in a fic but I think he has at least one older sibling
Favorite line: 🤔 his final lines in the movie are super well acted so they stick out me, but he has so many fun lines...
One way I relate to the character: Hmm not super passionate about current job 😂
Thing that gives me second hand embarrassment: I definitely feel like there's some line he has that's cringe worthy since he's somewhat notorious for his silly lines but I can't place any specific ones. I find his silliness very charming
Cinnamon roll or problematic fav?:
Again, not a huuuge fan of the term Cinnamon roll but he's pretty far from problematic, personally. Definitely deserved better!!
Amanda:
Sexuality headcanon: literally impossible to convince me she isn't a lesbian
Otp: I suppose Lynn, though there's suuuuper little content for any amanda ship. I don't super think they'd work out long term but their dynamic is interesting enough. On the plus to the Brotp with adam, they would have a somewhat similar dynamic to adams otp
Brotp: Adam! Doesn't get to play out in canon but I think they'd get along really well 👍 If that's a cheat because I already said him, then I'd say Jill from saw 2, their relationship made me real sad
Notp: amanda/jigsaw 🤢
First headcanon that pops into my head: other than the lesbianism? 🤔🤔 ?????? If no jigsaw she would've gotten better...? Distant family life? Only child?
Favorite line: "Fix me motherfucker! I'm standing right here!" Youch...
One way I relate to the character: hmm other than the lesbianism? 🤔 I think she's def approaching butch, she seems like independence would be important to her...? Empathetic? (She's probably second on relatability but also, definitely not very much like me irl)
Thing that gives me second hand embarrassment: I guess her reliance on jigsaw 😂 a lot of their scenes are... 🤢
Cinnamon roll or problematic fav?: I guess I'd have to say problematic bc of all the... killing, but it's all his fault!! I don't know she'd ever be in 'cinnamon roll' territory but
This was fun thank you 🫂
#texts#personal#saw#berserk#mgs#I gotta reread berserk sometime my memory of it's getting a bit hazy#also I know you haven't seen/played most of these media but if you have any thoughts/comments feel free to add 👍👍
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i saw, that you ship john and andrew. and since ya also ship chris and ryan. i have a question. how would have you compared john and chris? both ships are similiar in a way.
oh, wow. didn’t expect someone to go so far into this blog or my ao3 page, to see my john/andrew shippy stuff. i’m so slow with updating stuff for these two, after all. but ah, dang. i feel so seen, haha.
but regarding the question, while yeah, there are parallels/similarities between the two pairs. i must say, that comparing john & chris feels a bit like comparing an apple to a tomato to me. both are ‘fruits’, but they're very different kinds of one.
now, *sits back* prepare yourself. this would be a loooong rant.
so, ah. while john & chris do have some common/shared narrative moments. they’re still have fundamentally different roots. the main difference is that even if we take the gen approach, the reason why chris & john care about ryan & andrew are very opposite. i mean, it’s in chris’s nature to be a caretaker, a father figure. he’s an operator of a summer camp. he has to be a specific sort of person for this job. meanwhile, for john, it’s an exception, that he cares about andrew in this sort of manner, not an universal rule. he’s more of wanna-be-the-lead-party vs ‘dad’ of the group. so when you look at it, chris starts as the caretaker of all, before he sort of upgraded it to ‘some special, extra attention for my fav counselor only’. while john already has this unspoken mindset, that he’s andrew’s caretaker, specifically. he tries to look out for the rest of the group too, but more out of obligation, than anything else. he won’t go out of his way to save & stick with them. when angela gets dragged into the sewer, john grabs andrew’s arm repeatedly, yanking him back, when he tries to jump in and search for her. it’s crystal clear, where his priority lies in that very moment. or even, when someone of the group dies, and john nearly shrugs it off. sometimes for andrew’s sake, even if he was the one, who didn’t ‘saved’ them. it’s disturbingly easy for him to make peace with their death, if he and andrew are safe. he does care about them to a degree, but his main objective is to keep himself & andrew in one piece. chris hackett is less pragmatic in that sense. while ryan is his main priority, he still would have drowned in guilt, if some other counselors died in front/because of him. for john, it’s a ‘sacrifice that can be made if necessary’. chris’s favoritism made ryan ‘the most important’ out of all, while in john’s case, it’s more like, that andrew is ‘the only really important’.
then, where chris is empathic, john leans toward cold intelligence. and this is where their next difference is pretty apparent. even in how they handle ryan / andrew. chris wants ryan to reach out a bit more, learn responsibility. when john just rather would do everything for andrew, and don’t let him make decisions, that he views as ‘doubtful’. chris wants to help ryan to mature up, mostly for the kid’s own sake. and then, you have john who kind of aggressively babysits andrew at times, haha. he doesn’t needs andrew to be ‘responsible’. he kind of likes, that he’s dependant on him, i imagine. but oddly enough, where chris would insist on things to be done his way, john would back off as soon as andrew would give him a sign, that he’s got it. so hilariously enough, while john is the one, who would tend to andrew, he seems to respect his ability to do smth by himself too. and chris just like ‘no, ryan. you do this how i told you to do it’. maybe, it bc chris is kinda more of ‘old-time’ southern hardass, where john is more of a wimp lol. their personalities, while sharing that neurotic middle aged man angle, still have a bit of different taste to it. their professions also play in it. chris is more down to earth, where john is more of a ‘thinker’. chris bases a lot of his decisions on either experience or emotion. john bases his own on cold intelligence & personal whims. they’re like ice & water here. same essence, but different structure/effect.
now, more toward shippy stuff. both chris & john seem to view ryan / andrew as a ‘good kid’. someone, who is quiet and mostly harmless. someone, who needs their care/attention, bc of how reversed they are. but it’s where the two pairs also sort of switch places. ryan & john would pretty much slide into denial, if chris & andrew would do smth wrong. they would insist, that it’s not so or was an accident. meanwhile, chris and andrew are both ‘situational murders’. chris established as such by canon (when he turns into a werewolf), and andrew can become one. but it’s interesting to think about the ways and extent john & ryan can respectively go in their denial/desire to protect the other. i’m pretty sure, that they’re both capable of murder. i mean, ryan canonically can attempt to kill a person for chris’s sake. and john, while appearing very anti-weapon/anti-violence, clearly has a mean stick in him. and he’s pragmatic. so if there was a choice to kill someone to save andrew, he would have done it, i feel like. but ah, back to chris & john’s similarities, rather than differences. they both like a blank-faced, low-emotion guy. a sort of person, who is hard to read for others, but way easier to read for them, bc they pay a lot of attention to their companion. and bc ryan & andrew act more natural and laid-back with them. they’re both implied to be kids, who came from households with ‘old mannered’ adults and prob mostly hang out with older people vs being around their peers. it feels more ‘normal’ for them to understand a middle aged dude, than connect with someone of their own age. it’s not weird for them. and chris & john, who implied to be isolated/lonely, would love this positive kind of connection, esp of they can influence someone in a good way.
and speaking of good influence, both ryan & andrew are this for chris & john too. as both of these men are ‘cursed’ with their own sort of disease. chris is a werewolf, and john is an alcoholic. both self-loathing to a degree. but ryan & andrew being there gives them smth to do. someone to try and be better for. i love how andrew’s presence sort of softens john’s rough edges, and makes him a bit more considerate toward others. if andrew would scold john for being rude to angela, he almost acts like a kicked dog, haha. and chris has to be ‘proper’ and ‘there’ for ryan. he can’t get depressed to the point, where one of his closest people would notice him slipping. in comparison, it’s easier for john to slip up, and even return to drinking. speaking of which, at least fanon wise, i must say, that chris has a will of steel, as he holds himself back around ryan to the point, where it feels like mental self-harm lol. john would give in way faster. chris would do all kinds of inner gymnastics to ‘justify’ whatever he does/feels, but john be like i can’t help myself. and this on itself is kind of a justification for him. sure, he will feel bad for a bit, but it’s less of chris’s endless angst lol. chris desperately wants to do the right thing. but john is pretty aware, that he himself isn’t a good person. therefore doing the right thing not always an option, that he would take. which once again makes sense, bc it’s pragmatic to do ‘bad stuff’ at times vs doing everything by the book.
and before this answer would get 10 pages long, i must say, that even the ‘creepy’ tendencies between chris & john would differ. chris eventually goes full low-key stalker mode, while still trying to mostly just ‘a friend’. but john can prob go deeper into it, as he doesn’t have the same ‘he looks up to me’ connection with andrew. like andrew respects him, but he doesn’t turn to john for advice usually. like it’s the other way around lmao. so he can be more casual with andrew, and they can connect over books/writing. they have similar interests. chris & ryan connect over their respective hobbies. so it’s a bit of a different sort of experience in both cases. chris has to do more research vs john, who sort of has it easy lol. on the other hand, while they both caretakers, chris has nearly endless access to ryan, while john will have to play it smart and get more time with andrew. frankly, it’s prob not super hard, as i imagine, that andrew would stay after classes to chat with john at times. but when it comes to collecting new info, learning about his routine and habits, well, john can only do so much, before overstepping the line, and using his position as professor to read some personal info on andrew. like both chris & john would abuse their position to gather this new bit of knowledge. but chris ‘needs’ to know this, bc he’s ryan’s mentor. and john would just want to know it, fully realizing, that he’s being weird lol. i feel like john would have an easier time accepting, that he’s not all that normal about andrew. vs chris, who sees it as a bad thing, due to his condition and also bc he’s concerned about how ryan is much younger, than him. chris & john both knew the angle, where their attraction is ‘controversial’. tho they both feel more worried about what such relationships might do to ryan & andrew in a long run, vs how outsiders/sociality would see it.
in oversimplified form, john/andrew & chris/ryan are the pairs, that sorta stuck in shitty situations. canonical wise, both of their narratives are tragic. but if we look at how chris & john would handle the problem of their younger companion having a crush on them & then dealing with the fact, that it’s mutual, well…chris is so much more modest about it. right until, he kind of not lol. and john already seems to think, that no one would care about andrew better, than him. so in a way, he decides everything inside his head, even before it gets out of hand. though, both ryan & andrew are the ones, who push things forward. chris & john have way too much nuances on their shoulders to be just as bold about their attraction. well, in the beginning.
i find it funny tho, that supermassive did it twice. sort of connected a shy, 'silent' kid with an older male, and made a huge part of their narrative focus on said man, specifically.
#asks#LH#quarry#chris x ryan#john/andrew#sorry for this long ass anwser#i guess i was dying to talk about john/andrew at least a bit lol
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Hopefully this isn't too vague although it's random. Mind absolutely infodumping about Abduxuel? From his pastimes to the reason why he enjoys them, what the personality inspiration is for him, why he enjoys parties and what about them, etc.
Always happy to word vomit about my bastard boi XD
Ngl when I first made Abdi he was a one off character meant to die bc I wanted to stick to the general aoex plot without making it supremely au by making another king dead.
But, as I was writing BRS, I had to flesh him out bc his story was meant to parallel Mephisto's and show the bad ending scenario basically. So as the BRS plotline developed and got more complicated, so did he.
Though I've been adding bits and pieces of info about him every time someone asks me a question bc I have to consider how he would react to different things that I never really would have thought about otherwise XD
For instance, this ask had me like hmm more info about my boy and realized I hadn't done the basics aka his "anniversary" day, mbti and zodiac sign.
So!
Mbti: Esfp. This one I've had for awhile, though I actually based his core personality off my cousin (I tend to relate characters to ppl I know irl to keep them consistent and realistic to how someone might actually act in situations and not a fantasy version of a person). He's flighty and gregarious and a physical kinda demon. He's great at little details but the big picture is right out with him, which is why he typically lets Mephisto come up with the far reaching plans and he's just along for the ride.
Astrology sign: Gemini. The twin thing was a big reason for this and also the personality lines up too so it's a bonus lmao I almost chose Scorpio but he's not that intense, way too flighty.
And Zodiac: This one is tough bc it's based on year born and technically he and Mephisto weren't born and when they gained egos it was almost simultaneously. So I had to find one that fit them both, but they had different elemental attributes. Water dragon fit Abdi best and Earth dragon seems to fit Meph best.
I could go on about how the traits align with him but I've pretty much always thought of him like Mephisto but without any real goals or ambitions besides entertainment, which is a terrifying concept when you think about it XD
Thanks for the ask~ @disasteroulik
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Hey! Sorry for the late ask, I literally just remembered the new chapter is out. And wow did it make me feel a lot of different things. I feel like it’s finally addressed Yuu’s ‘stupidity’ in a substantial way that’s really grounded it in not just his own persistence, but in his belief in Mika and their combined strength. And even though his plan to let Mika make a plan is not immediately promising, I like how they had him reflect on the situation they’re in and fully commit to making the best choices for themselves.
Also there were some much appreciated cute cheeky moments like Mika being chill about Yuu falling off the tower, Yuu self-identifying as the dumb brawn in the duo, and Yuu using Mika’s own words against him.
Ultimately though, their fight hit me right in the feels. It really contrasted Mika’s pessimism to Yuu’s optimism about their relationship and situation at large. Mika’s insistence that he must lose Yuu shouldn’t choose him bc he can’t believe it’s possible for them to actually work out and be happy like he wants. But what got me specifically was Mika telling Yuu that he should learn to like Shinoa back. That he should go live a normal (heterosexual) life without him bc Yuu’s feelings for him are ‘trivial’. As if Yuu could just choose to get over Mika and be happy with Shinoa. Like I’m sure I don’t have to explain to you how much that relates to so many ppl’s young queer experiences, but the nuance of the way they represented it in this chapter felt so much bigger to me than anything else between them so far. So sorry to YuuNoa shippers, but if Shinoa and Yuu ever get together after it being stated that Yuu doesn’t even like her at this point in the story, I might actually have to bring out the baiting word frfr.
Don't worry about it anon! I'm going to be super busy this month, so I also actually forgot there was a new chapter at all, which is why this response is even later than usual.
This gets long since I go a bit off the rails so I'm actually gonna utilize a read more this time! Sorry if this is a mess, again I'm busy and my thoughts are a bit scattered as such.
Yeah, you have a point. Really, I'm glad that Kagami didn't suddenly pull a 'Yuu is suddenly a mastermind' sort of thing and is instead sticking to his guns of 'Yuu has no idea what he's doing, but he sure is doing it'. I wasn't expecting that Yuu would suddenly become a mastermind or anything, but I was a bit worried that Yuu would suddenly have some half-baked plan in mind that would just work out because he's the protagonist you know? I'm much happier to see that his plan is to not plan and let Mika, who is way better at this kind of thing, do it. Sure, it's a bit concerning since Mika's just in the dark about the interworkings of everything as Yuu is, but it's a much better alternative.
And, before I dive into the rest of what you said, I'm happy to see them finally trying to set outside of the role of being a pawn. Outside of it showing some character growth for Yuu (kinda), it reflects Guren's story. Yuu and Guren have always had parallels, but Yuu is finally starting to step away from being a pawn, something Guren (arguably) has never really been able to do. Guren tried his damnedest to stop being a pawn in his story. He even also took the approach of 'either we achieve our goal or we die trying', but, in the end, he failed on both accounts because he cared too much. Maybe you could argue he's no longer a pawn with his current resurrection goals, but I'm specifically referring to Catastrophe at 16's story when I say this. Yuu is now essentially in that same position, but I have a feeling that, unlike Guren, he'll be able to break free from his role and actually achieve his goal. It's a very good 'the student surpasses the mentor' type thing. It'd be interesting to see if it's just because Yuu has more protagonist powers than Guren (a.k.a there's no particular reason Yuu succeeds when Guren failed; it just be what it is), or if it's because, unlike Guren, Yuu is able to sacrifice people more easily. As Yuu alludes to here and we saw last chapter, Yuu apparently has no qualms in killing(?) people he considers friends and has called family before. That could certainly play a role in Yuu taking a different path than Guren. However, you didn't really bring any of this up so this is a huge digression from your ask. Sorry about that! Moving on.
Say what you will about OnS, but it always fits in time for little character moments like that. It's fun to see.
To be honest, I don't have much to add to your last paragraph there as yeah, it's an interesting way to read that part of their argument and I can relate. I'll tackle the last bit of it though. For full disclosure, I feel I should say that I don't personally ship YuuNoa, but have no problems with it. If it became canon I just wouldn't be surprised bc that's how most stories like this go. But now into what I intend to say.
Mmm. Honestly, I do think applying "the baiting word" (I've never seen anyone avoid saying it so that made me laugh. thank you truly LOL) is a fair thing to do if that were to happen. The word does get used maybe a little too liberally as fans hype themselves up for a possible gay romance a bit too much sometimes (and I am very guilty of this myself. Don't get me wrong. I too wear my rose-tinted 'no one is straight' glasses at all times), but OnS is pretty heavy-handed with the subtext sometimes, whether it means to be or not. There are a lot of things I could point to with this, but the most glaring one was what happened in this chapter with comparing Yuu's feelings for Mika with his feelings for Shinoa. It's not even something that's exclusive to this chapter, though I don't think it's been this blatant before. Really, the amount of times the love that the protag (I'm grouping Guren in with this bc what he has going on with Mahiru and Shinya is incredibly comparable to what these three have going on) has for their best friend is compared to the love they have/should have with their LI is too great to count. For Yuu in particular though?
Numerous straight romances in shounen (other genres as well, but particularly shounen) feel forced due to the protag having more chemistry with the male (or female if the protag is not male) cast than their straight LI as romance is usually more of an undertone/side thing than the focus (though there are more reasons than that that I won't get into for length purposes), but usually, there's some build-up even if it's a poor excuse for relationship development. For Yuu and Shinoa that's not really the case. Yuu has never shown romantic interest in Shinoa, so it shouldn't be a surprise to see it confirmed here. Any romantic moments from them are only portrayed/seen as such from Shinoa's perspective, so I'm inclined to agree with you that it'd feel very off at this point in time for Yuu to end up with Shinoa. The story isn't over, so there's still time for feelings to build on Yuu's end of things, but right now? Yeah, there isn't anything there for Yuu. His feelings for Mika, romantic or otherwise, are stronger than his feelings for Shinoa.
But I do feel it's worth bringing up that, just because Yuu doesn't have romantic feelings for Shinoa rn doesn't mean MikaYuu will be canon. Who knows, we might end up with Yuu with no one (which would make more sense than YuuNoa at this point in time).
But hey, just because your ship isn't/doesn't end up as canon doesn't mean you can't enjoy it! That's what headcanons and fanworks are for!
#was that last section of things necessary?#no not really but those were some interesting lines and thoughts from anon that I wanted to talk about#This is my attempt to not offend anyone bc I just don't have the mental energy to deal with that#sorry if I made anyone mad with that last bit! truly#it's just my view on things#if mine differs from yours then cool#it's what makes things interesting#Owari no Seraph#Yuichirou Hyakuya#Owari no Seraph spoilers#OnS 119 spoilers#OnS 119#Asks#Anonysis Asks#My posts#also yeah I think it'd be real cute if MikaYuu did become canon
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2022 Writing Year in Review
thank you for the tag @northerngoshawk!! 💕
1. Number of stories posted to AO3: 18
2. Word count this year: 172,404 words! we could get really technical and subtract the word counts for the fics i technically wrote in 2021 but typed/posted in 2022, but that’s a lot of work i don’t feel like doing lol
3. Fandoms I wrote for: ATLA, Law & Order, MCU (+ Venom), Monk, and Medium. not sure i want to know what that says about me...
4. Pairings: petermj (mcu), allison/joe (medium), kincoy (claire/jack from l&o), zukaang (atla), tylara (atla), mjflash (mcu), and kataang (atla). a nice mixture!
5. Stories with the most:
Kudos: Walls (my mj&flash friendship fic) comes in first with 114 kudos
Bookmarks: Walls comes out on top again with 29 bookmarks!
Comment threads: this thing of darkness (i acknowledge mine), my mjflash + venom!flash fic, has the most comment threads by far with 47, the result of a small but loyal following of readers who made my day every time they commented 💛
Word count: by a hair, The Wrong Note (my monk x medium crossover) has the highest word count at 37,630 words! this thing of darkness (i acknowledge mine) has 37,011 words
6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): im proud of all my works for different reasons! today i shall spotlight my children will listen series, consisting of two waterbending-centric fics narrated by kanna and katara respectively; both stories explore cultural loss and intergenerational trauma. i’d never written companion pieces prior to that point, so im proud of how i was able to construct those parallel narratives! i also had a blast reworking one of my favorite shel silverstein poems to weave throughout the story
7. Work I’m least proud of (and why): ?? this is a silly question. fanfic is my hobby, im not writing it for journal publication. onto the next one!
8. Share or describe a favorite review you received: literally Every review i got on the children will listen series; i had no idea how impactful those fics would be or how many people would relate to it, but im so glad i ended up writing and publishing them! i also have to shoutout ocean’s review on time apart, time together (the tylara fic i wrote for her bday 💛) bc she truly Understood that story through and through, and i am equal parts delighted and relieved that she did (since it was written for her 💕)
9. A time when writing was really, really hard: i mean, im a college student. i almost never write fic during the semester, lol. i Literally haven’t written fic since,,,, august 2022. (technically i could have written some fic these past few weeks BUT it’s the holidays so i’ve been spending time with family + revising my research paper + loosely working on some original writing)
10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: BRUH all of my law & order fics surprised me 😭 come on, babe (why don’t we paint the town?) contains Thee sexiest scene i’ve ever written; find a flask (we’re playing fast and loose) is written SOLELY from jack’s pov (a 50-year-old white man, how low have i fallen); and it was more than worth it (my kincoy magnum opus) was my first foray into nonlinear storytelling. all in all, 2022 was quite an experimental year for me!
11. A favorite excerpt of your writing: i’ve talked to death my favorite excerpt from it was more than worth it, so instead i’ll spotlight an excerpt from if memories could fade away (my mj birthday fic):
Ned sticks his tongue out at her, and MJ responds in turn before opening the door anyway, because he’s Ned and she’s MJ and it’s always been just them, the two of them, eight years going on eighteen.
“Damn, girl, you live like this?” Ned says as he enters, watching where he steps so he doesn’t trip over one of her many piles of everything—textbooks, clothes, journals, old CDs too scratched to use that will soon become the basis of MJ’s next art project: voices we no longer hear.
She remembers getting each CD, starting with Let Go on her tenth birthday, back when she lived in New Orleans and always kept her curly brown hair in symmetrical cornrows or cropped at the base of her neck because of the suffocating humidity. She remembers taking each CD and ripping the music to her computer so her dad could move it onto her tiny red MP3 player for the long, long ride to Queens that began the next day. She remembers two CDs breaking during the drive and one CD breaking when they arrived because she threw it at the wall of her empty new room, angry, so angry she’d been ripped from her home like music from a shiny silver disc and it wasn’t fair, it wasn’t fair—
“You see, guests usually stay downstairs,” MJ teases, pushing aside a pile of clothes so Ned has room to sit on her bed. She takes a seat at her desk, spinning the chair around to face her dearest friend. “If I’d known you were planning to invade my personal space, I might have considered making my living arrangements more presentable.”
Ned snickers. “Considered, and then not done a damn thing about them?”
MJ winks at him. “You know me so well.”
Ned has known her so long, known her messy room, known her impenetrable walls, known her since she was thrown into a new school in a new city expected to make new friends when Michelle knew even at ten that would never happen, not that year, because 5th graders had already chosen their loyal companions five, six, seven years ago and there was no room for a Black girl to fit into a white noise machine that already hummed along without her.
Her parents sent her to school anyway. She must not have been persuasive enough.
MJ MY BELOVED!!! 🥺💛 i enjoyed playing with sentence length/rhythm and metaphors/similes in this fic, and i think this excerpt in particular captures that experimentation
12. How did you grow as a writer this year: hmmmm well i tried my hand at some action sequences in this thing of darkness (i acknowledge mine), which probably counts for something. and like i already mentioned, it was more than worth it was my first foray into nonlinear storytelling (and a lot of people told me they enjoyed it!) + if memories could fade away involved stylistic experimentation. in other words, i think i grew as a writer simply by letting myself try new things, from how i told stories to what content i included within them!
13. How do you hope to grow next year: i just want to write more, honestly. the more i write, the more i can try, and hopefully the more i’ll grow! to be more specific, i want to try my hand at some sci-fi/near-future dystopian original stories (à la kazuo ishiguro’s klara and the sun)
14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): probably ocean and ambi! they always put up with my fic-related ramblings, are wonderful to bounce ideas off of, and by virtue of their existence (and enthusiasm) remind me why i love writing fic in the first place 💛 in terms of non-tumblr influences, haha, reading the promise by damon galgut was a GAME CHANGER for me. third person omniscient with no quotation marks?? the entire story is an allegory for post-apartheid south africa?? a stylistic and thematic MASTERPIECE. i can only dream of writing a novel with such artistic daring
15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: lol this thing of darkness (i acknowledge mine) is packedTM with shakespeare references and milton jokes; if memories could fade away explicitly mentions one of avril lavigne’s albums (seen in the provided excerpt); won’t you hang a picture? references nancy drew; and Walls involves a whole project about the picture of dorian gray. when narratively appropriate, i never hesitate to sneak in my own interests 😂
16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: write for fun! write what you love! don’t be afraid to experiment! listen to the incredibles soundtrack while you write! read, read, read! write with a cat on your lap! never delete anything! write when you’re inspired and write when you’re not! if it brings you joy to create, then what you create is good enough!
17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: honestly, i want to focus on my original writing and my research more, so i may not have as much time for fic. that said, i hope to write:
a sequel to this thing of darkness (i acknowledge mine)
the next part of my mcu medium!au
ml fic in general
atla fic in general
time will tell!
18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read: i know a lot of people have been tagged for this already, so apologies if im bombarding you or if you’ve already done this! i’ll tag @justoceanmyth, @ambivalentmarvel, @seek--rest, and @shifuaang :)
#no pressure y'all 💛#(this is starkravinghazelnoots for the marvel mutuals)#amy gets tagged#helaina tagged me in a similar game (thank u friend!!) that i still need to do; i never thought the holidays could be so BUSY what
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I know this isn't my fandom blog, but it is my main blog and I've been talking about Bubble for a paper I'm writing in my abnormal psych class, so I'm just gonna post this here.
Normally I don't like to hype Netflix movies because I think Netflix is a fairly predatory streaming service (they all are really, but still), and their movies and shows often get cut off before they can really get going, but holy shit this one was good.
I don't normally watch movies and stuff because I like to stick with my current hyperfixations, but because I'm writing this paper I ended up picking it after finding myself in a reddit hole after searching for "animated autism movies". I'm not entire convinced that the characters are autistic, but I certainly related to them more than I do most characters.
Hibiki has confirmed sound hypersensitivity. He was taken to a lot of doctors as a child to figure out why, we even got an MRI scene where he was visibly flinching from the noises. He got overwhelmed easily by the sounds of the city, and we have a few scenes where we see his mother progressively lose hope and eventually she drops him in what looks to be a special education class. Throughout the movie we see him being very protective over his headphones and wincing at multiple sounds, showing an obvious disinterest in socialization, and he has a grand total of two interests that we see, both of which he seems incredibly good at. Hibiki is also awkward around socialization, hyperaware of his surroundings, and I noticed a general lack of emotions and empathy compared to his teammates. It wasn't completely gone, but it was noticeable if you were looking (I was looking bc of this paper).
The other main character is named Uta, who isn't actually a human at all. I never actually figured out what she is? She's like,, literally a bubble. But also not? Anyway, aside from the movie's main problem not making almost any sense, Uta is nonspeaking for the first part of the film, and only speaks in simple words and references to the little mermaid which she read early on. Both her and Hibiki seem to connect in ways that neither could with any of the other members on the team. I'm not gonna give spoilers that I don't think are relevant to this autism thing, but there's probably several reasons outside of that. Regardless, it made sense to me that if they were both autistic they'd be closer to each other despite barely knowing each other. I know I've always found it easier to connect and communicate with other autistic individuals in my life.
Uta also has some fairly weird mannerisms and very clearly doesn't understand social cues. This makes sense given the fact that she's literally not human, but I couldn't help but draw parallels between her behaviors and how I acted as a kid (re: like a feral cat).
Now I know I didn't talk about everything in the movie, I'm like three hours past when I should have gone to bed and I need to save some of this brain power for the actual paper, but if anyone actually reads this post please go watch Bubble on Netflix. It makes no sense, I still barely understand what was going on in the movie, but it was so pretty to look at and the main characters are autistic coded at the very least. The music is also going to be stuck in my head for weeks.
Anyway. (not so) Mini rant over, time to sleep and try not to hyperfixate for the next week on this movie. It's already like two years old and had barely anything about it online, so I seriously doubt I'd be able to find a solid amount of fanfiction to fuel me if that happened. /hj
Trailer (the english dub is rlly good btw): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pbWblLkHHk
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Girl i just have so much to say so bear with me
I'm not gonna lie I love how complicated this whole story is because it surprises me every time with what they do and how it all turns out
First of all the peeps, Jongdae being so loud with his realizations made me laugh like dude was thinking out loud making everything more awkward lmao but i love him like that ❤️
baek is still the mvp, my guy, my true champ in this mess 🫶🏼🫰🏼🤘🏼 and poor nini he didn't do anything wrong he just loves his friends so much and wants them to be all together and happy 🥺
I loved the easter eggs like i thought wow jongdae still can't cook meat on a grill to save his life 😭
You're so good at conveying emotions and details, i felt the anxiety when Mel was trying to hide the marks of what happened and everyone was so nosey 😖
By the way when Mel said he took the ring i thought he took it forcibly against her wish but i didn't expect that at all, now i want to know what was Mel's reasoning behind the decision to give it back if it affected her that much to lose it 👀
Mel Mel i just want to smack her in the head, i mean chan has always been straight forward with his feelings (except for that one time he just left) and she just dived deeper into something she's still hesitant about and mislead chan into thinking she was ready to work it out smh
I love all the parallels and how they've both done similar things to each other, but their wounds are so deep that they cannot be fixed with a simple sorry, she still resents him too much to accept that she did a lot of damage too and the lack of communication just worsened the situation beyond repair 🤧
Oh and that last forehead kiss and soft thank you broke me I hope you know that 🙂
you said that it's almost over and it made me sad, what would I do without this amazing story, it's been going for so long and I've been following it since ch1 always looking forward to the new updates 😪
Anyways great chapter, I'm devastated 💔 I'm gonna go wrap myself in a blanket and cry, ily bye ❤️
Yay let’s go essay!!! 👏🏾👏🏾🥰
I was hesitant to post this chapter bc I was nervous about backlash. I knew it was gonna upset ppl but was scared folks were gonna drop it 😭. But seeing this fills me with relief 😮💨
Jongdae was a mess this whole chapter, I blame it on the weather 😂 and one thing he shouldn’t ever be is behind a grill lmao. Bbh is THE voice of reason but idt anyone is actually listening tho 😬. And nini is such a poor baby. The couple was really couple-ing when it came to bullying him 😭
I love getting compliments about my writing!!!! Esp this one, it’s such a high honor and helps with the imposter syndrome 😭🙌🏾
The drama with the ring oh boy. All imma say is they def have different stories on what went down that day and we haven’t even began to get into it 🙃
Mel needs a good shaking I can agree. Chanyeol has been so patient with her ☹️. Some would say she don’t deserve him 🚶🏾♀️
These two react so strongly with their emotions. And the thing I like about them both is that they never seem to realize just how badly their actions hurt each other until they voice it. Then they’re like ‘oh that was bad, huh?’ 😭
Don’t worry the last kiss messed me up too 🤕
I knoooow I can’t believe it’s almost over either. But I appreciate you sticking around! And am glad I can create something you can look forward to 🥲
So sorry for breaking you. I promise it’ll get better ❤️. Well….👀
youtube
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if you’re open for regular requests i’d love to request lil scenarios of the boys learning english alongside their english-speaking s/o! this is totally self-indulgent i’m doing the TEFL program and i’m going to south korea next year to teach :)
first of all, that’s amazing omg!! congratulations my love, i hope you have the best time over there and please don’t be shy in sharing your stories with us!!! i tried to stick to the boys actually learning english with their s/o but i strayed from that with a few members just bc i ran out of ideas lol but i hope you still enjoy!
fair warning....i’ve never ~seriously~ tried to learn korean, so i’m not entirely certain of the parallels between korean and english. i just hope these are wholesome enough to override that lmao
namjoon:
“You know,” Namjoon looked up from his phone, “I understand expanding your vocabulary, but why are there so many weird slang words?”
“Kids these days?” You shrugged, the man chuckling in response before flipping his phone around to show you what had puzzled him.
“If something slaps, that’s...good?” He wondered, watching as you suppressed a smile at the tweet he was showing you.
You could tell by the profile picture that the user was an ARMY, one of the many fan profiles on the platform, and the tweet was written completely in English.
Although there was a ‘Translate to Korean’ option readily available with just a tap of his thumb, you knew Namjoon never missed an opportunity to challenge himself to be able to fully comprehend what a native English speaker was trying to say.
You nearly snorted at the tweet’s content, smiling as you read it out loud.
“The Dis-ease bridge just saved my life. Seriously, this song slaps.”
Glancing at Namjoon, he raised his eyebrows, eagerly waiting for you to translate and explain what that could equate to in Korean.
“It’s definitely a good thing, Joon. They love it.”
At your interpretation, Namjoon grinned, nodding to himself as he pulled his phone back in front of his face to scroll through more reaction tweets to the new album release.
seokjin:
“What the hell is that?”
You picked your head up from your sketchbook when you heard Seokjin whine from beside you, eyebrows knitting together at his distressed tone. Taking a glance over at his laptop screen, you found his mouse bouncing from letter to letter on one of his weekly english lessons.
“What is that, like 15 letters? How do you even use that in a sentence?” He went on, obviously flustered by the word on the screen.
Pulchritudinous.
You placed your hand over his to stop his panicked counting of the letters, causing him to look over at you with a sigh as he frowned.
You nearly giggled at his reaction, but the genuine fear in his eyes made you stifle it as you soothingly held his hands in yours.
“It’s just an over complicated way of saying beautiful. I don’t know why they’re teaching you that, nobody ever uses it.” You assured him, his eyes going down in size a bit at your words before he nodded.
Watching as a smirk tilted his lips, you raised your brows at the sudden expression.
“What?”
“Well like, I could say I’m...that?” He said, eyebrows raised cockily as he gestured to the long word stretched across the screen.
“Well it’s actually not used like,” you paused, giving in with a shrug as you grinned back at him.
“Sure, love.”
yoongi:
“Why did I skip English class all the time?” Yoongi sighed, pinching his bottom lip between his fingers as he plucked at the skin in frustration.
“Because you were trying to be a rebel.” You answered without looking up from your phone, the man obviously not liking your answer as he reached over to where you were laying beside him to pinch at your hip.
Yelping, you scooted across the mattress to get away from his hand, whining his name with a scoff before looking over at his notepad.
“What are you doing, anyway?” You asked, leaning on your palm as you scanned the rows of scribbled English letters written on the page.
“I’m trying to get better at writing.” He admitted shyly, a small grin on his face to match the fond one on your own.
“Aw,” you pouted, Yoongi raising his eyebrows at your tone, “but I like your chicken scratch.”
“You’re such a brat.” He chuckled, adjusting the velcro on his brace with a grunt.
Since Yoongi’s shoulder surgery took away obvious straining activities like dancing and performing, he’d turned to studying English from the comfort of your bed during his recovery as one of the only safe activities he could partake in for a while.
It was now one of his favorite past times, learning new words and phrases he could potentially use in the future. It worked for you both because it took his mind off the pain and kept him motivated, and since you could speak both his and your language, you could help him out whenever he got stuck on something.
Usually he did lessons verbally on his phone, but it seemed today he had taken the old fashioned route.
“Your handwriting really isn’t bad, Yoongs.” You observed, the carefully placed tails at the end of each ‘a’ making you smile out of fondness for the man.
“My man has the prettiest handwriting.” You cooed, pushing a strand of his stark black hair out of his eyes as he blushed down at his notebook.
“Stop that.”
hoseok:
“Hey, babe?” Hoseok called for you, listening to your footsteps growing closer before you popped your head into the kitchen doorway.
“Yeah?”
“I’m having a little trouble.” He gestured to his open laptop on the counter, you recognizing it as an assignment from his English course.
“What happened?”
“Pronouns. Pronouns happened.” He pouted, his disdain for the new chapter quite obvious as he stared down his computer screen.
“What about them?” You asked, stepping closer to the man sitting at the kitchen island and placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
“I need to make ten sentences using proper pronouns and I feel like I’m doing it all wrong.” He explained, causing you to hum as you looked over his sentences.
“These look great, Hobi.” You smiled as you glanced over the first three he’d written, flawlessly executed on the document.
“Can you help me with the next one?” He wondered, you nodding your head as you took a seat on the stool next to his.
“What do you want the next one to say?” You asked, watching as he glanced off to the side in thought, slightly squinting his eyes at the tile floor beneath the sink.
“My house is next to,” He spoke in English, pausing as he searched his brain for what pronoun to put next.
“Theys?” He answered as more of a question, then shaking his head as he switched back to Korean, “wait, no.” He sighed, placing his chin in his hand in thought before glancing over to you.
“I know it’s wrong, I just don’t know what the right answer is instead.” He explained, you shooting him a loving smile as you pushed the dark raven hair off his forehead and pressed a kiss to the newly revealed skin.
“I’ll help you, Sunshine. No worries.”
jimin:
Flopping onto the bed, you let your tired body fall on top of Jimin’s hoodie clad chest, his arm encircling your body as he mumbled a soft greeting to you.
“Hm, what are you learning about today?” You nuzzled into his chest, peering at his phone propped up on his thigh.
“Animals. Birds, mostly.” He answered, briefly turning from the screen to press a kiss to your head before focusing back on the row of English words matched with pictures of popular birds glowing from the device.
The first was a robin, the next a blue jay, and then a dove.
You listened as the virtual instructor prompted Jimin to repeat after her, spelling out the letters before stating the whole word. You smiled as your boyfriend followed instruction, pronouncing the words the best he could after the microphone chimed for him to do so.
“D-o-v-e. Dove.”
“Dove.” He repeated, smiling to himself as the app announced he got the point with a little heart.
“That’s cute.” He went back to his native language, you humming in confusion as you lifted your head up off his chest to look at him.
“The heart?” You asked, reaching up to twist a stray strand of hair out of his eye as he shook his head.
“Dove.” He said again, making you tilt your head, not knowing what he meant.
“It sounds like ‘love.’” He connected the two English words, you smiling fondly at him in response before scooting up the bed to kiss the tip of his button nose.
“You’re so cute.”
taehyung:
Three knocks at the door announced someone’s arrival to your bedroom, causing your head to lift from the novel you’d been so immersed in. Taehyung was home, but you’d wanted to give him space because you knew he needed to work on lyrics for his mixtape in order to submit them on time.
“Hey,” he poked his head in with a small smile, “can you help me with something?” He asked sheepishly, stepping further into the room when you nodded.
“Of course. What is it?” You set your book down, marking your place before closing it to pay full attention to your boyfriend.
“Well, I’m trying to write this verse in English and,” he trailed off with a shrug, “you know.” He finished, you nodding in response with a gesture for him to come sit next to you.
He eagerly walked over to you with his notebook in hand, lowering himself to the mattress before rolling his way over to where you were leaning against the headboard.
Honestly, Taehyung’s English wasn’t bad at all. He was insecure about it, but you’d never really understood what the reason for that feeling was. His vocabulary was more than decent, his comprehension was good, and his pronunciation was great for having such a thick accent.
But there were many times where Taehyung came to you for guidance, as you were a native English speaker yourself.
And so, as he rested his head on your shoulder confiding in you about everything he wanted to say and how he wanted to say it, you patiently took him through what would work and rhyme best, smiling as he hummed the melody to himself to see if the phrases would work in his creation.
jungkook:
“Baby, can you read it to me again before we go on? Just one more time.”
You glanced over at your boyfriend in his makeup chair, several employees bustling around the man as they attempted to get him ready to go on stage while they had him seated.
With his arm extended backward to where you stood behind his leather chair, he offered his phone to you while shooting you a grin through the reflection in the mirror.
Taking the device from his hand, you opened it to the notes app where he’d written what he wanted to say in his statement on stage in just a few minutes.
You were in London tonight, which meant that all of the boys had been rehearsing their English so that they could communicate easier with their audience.
Jungkook, ever the over-achiever, was determined to do the toughest English tongue twister he could possibly find. Not only that, but in a British accent for his British ARMY’s.
“Betty bought a bit of better butter to make her bitter butter better.” You read from the phone, barely able to read the sentence yourself before you glanced up at Jungkook through the mirror again.
You watched your boyfriend nod as his brain took in the words you’d just said, taking a deep inhale before he began speaking the phrase back to you.
You gawked as the man effortlessly repeated after you, a few of the makeup artists stopping as well as Jungkook raised his eyebrows back at you.
“Was that okay?”
#bts#bts writing#bts fanfiction#bts scenarios#bts scenario#bts reactions#bts reaction#bts blurbs#bts blurb#bts fluff#bts member x reader#bts x reader#namjoon x reader#namjoon fluff#seokjin x reader#seokjin fluff#yoongi x reader#yoongi fluff#hoseok x reader#hoseok fluff#jimin x reader#jimin fluff#taehyung x reader#taehyung fluff#jungkook x reader#jungkook fluff
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honestly THANK YOU for saying all that abt baghra bc i thought i was going crazy from not liking her??? bc i haven't read the books and only summaries of them on wiki and like. i dunno why ppl like her actually even in the show bc this guy, her son, is like "i wanna make the world better for us grisha" and she's just like "no." even tho he sees that she's MAKING HERSELF SICK from suppressing her powers! she's literally like in bed coughing in the flashback yet seem much healthier at the little palace. also like after everything, after her disapproval, after the fold, after centuries of waiting for the sun summoner.. he never abandons her. he makes sure she's cares for. he doesn't harm her. and i have to wonder if baghra has ever thanks him for that, for just not leaving her alone. like i dunno how im suppose ro believe aleks is a heartless villain when he still cares for his abusive mom like this. like has baghra even told her she loved him (honestly she reminds me of a classic emotionally unavailable asian parent but maybe that's just me). also im wondering if baghra ever told aleks that he had an aunt.. bc like.. now that u bring up her isolating him it's like hmmmm...
not at me being like alina... why do u trust the bitter old woman who literally beats u with a stick and verbally abuses u every chance she gets.. just bc she showed a bad painting... like.. pls use two braincells to see that who u figured out as his mother... is also using his protection..
like baghra could've upped and left with alina. but no. she stayed bc she knew she was safe under aleks's protection.
alsoim just impressed that after his first friend tried to drown him and harvest his bones... he didn't go into hiding???? he still wanted to make a safe heaven for grisha!!! HE STILL WANTED TO PROTECT GRISHA EVEN AFTER HIS GRISHA FRIEND TRIED TO KILL HIM FOR HIS FUCKEN BONES. like... this is the guy im suppose to believe is the villain???
honestly i feel like part of the reason why LB's plotlines seem so bad and disconnected (and sometimes outright racist but that's another rant) and why darkles is disproportionately more violent and villainous in the later books is bc she didn't expect the darkling to be so popular and wanted to stick with her guns of making him the villain. but also wanted the money from aleks's popularity. but like you can't have ur cake and eat it too.
Well thank you for sending this ask! It's very sweet and very passionate. I'm glad you liked my post! I didn't put as much thought into it as some of my others lol. I kind of just talked. But it was nice to be able to finally talk about some of the problems I have with both her character and the fandom/author's perception of her.
HERE is the post this is referring to, in case anyone's wondering.
👀👀 You've hit the nail on the head for so many things, here!
Baghra is extremely emotionally unavailable, basically to the point of neglect. She's also verbally and physically abusive, traits which I doubt were only reserved for her students and not her son. Baghra claims she would do anything to protect him, but I've known a lot of parents who have that mindset and yet still harm their children because they think it's "good for them".
Aleksander stays at Baghra's side for years, and even when they're opposing each other she's never too far away from him. Idk if you've read the books but he does eventually hurt her. And as much as I don't like Baghra, I think his actions were horrid. But I'm also honestly kind of surprised it took him so long lmao.
Yeah I mean, in terms of isolation, let's not forget that she never wanted to introduce him to his father, either. Baghra's sense of eternity clouds a lot of her judgments on relationships, which means she views most people as dust and therefore teaches her son to as well. The problem with that is that he's a growing child, and he needs those social and emotional attachments for healthy development.
I would bet quite a bit of money that Baghra has either never told him she loves him or she has told him so few times it's practically forgettable.
And everything becomes more complicated because so many of Baghra's actions are understandable because of her life and her history, but the impacts they have on the people around her, especially Aleksander, are permanently damaging. And the fact that that's never gone over in critical depth in the books or how it's glossed over in fandom is just very disconcerting. Like, acknowledging Baghra's failings doesn't mean we're excusing Aleksander's actions, it just means we're holding Baghra liable for her own. Which the fandom should be doing, considering she's the epitome of an abusive parental figure.
And Alina trusting Baghra over Aleksander is even more confusing! Especially in the show!! This is the woman who beat her and abused her and tortured her friends when they tiny little children (and who probably still does so now that they're adults). This is the woman who mocks you and harasses you and insults you on a regular basis. Why does Baghra revealing she's Aleksander's mother make Alina change her mind?! Like fuck, I'd just feel bad for Aleksander. No wonder he kept it a secret, I would too! And that painting is enough evidence?! Really?! A random painting shown to you by this abusive mentor that's been making your life hell. That's what you're going to betray your new lover over?
The friends trying to harvest his bones thing is a good point, too. I think Aleksander, especially show Aleksander, is incredibly idealistic. I think he cares too much for others - those he's deemed worth his care (a sentiment given to him by Baghra). Despite everything she's tried to teach him about hiding and abandoning others and never caring and never doing anything to help or reach out or connect with people, Aleksander still continues to do so. It's likely because he never got it from Baghra growing up, and so is desperate for those emotional needs to be fulfilled elsewhere.
His turning point, when Baghra tells him it was understandable that those kids tried to kill him because the world is such a hard place for them - that's crucial. And the reason it's possible as a motivating factor is because of that idealism and that desire to help and that desire to be everything his mother isn't. Baghra tells him this trauma he just experienced was because of the oppression of his people, and instead of following her lead and accepting that, going into hiding and abandoning everybody to their misery, he goes I can do something about that. I can make it so this never happens again. Which is usually how trauma like that combines with one's core personality traits at a young age, especially when there's none of the essential support systems in place to aid in recovery (ie, the role Baghra should have been filling but wasn't, because she decided to exacerbate the problem instead).
And yeah, one of my biggest problems with the ham-fisted "beating you over the head with a sledgehammer of evil deeds" look-how-bad-this-character-is! portrayal of the Darkling in the later books comes from the impression I get that Bardugo doesn't trust her readers. She's so desperate to have us hate this character and think him an irredeemable villain, not trusting any of her readers to engage critically with a morally gray character, that it feels quite a bit like condescending fucking bullshit. Which ew, I know how to engage with literature, thanks.
She really does seem to look down on a large part of her fandom, and imo, the infantilization of the female characters in her books seems to carry over to her impression of most of her female readers as well. Which is why the Darkling's character arc gets fucking destroyed. But he's still a good cash grab, of course, so she'll shake his dead corpse in front of the fandom for money every time she wants something from it.
Also! Another reason I think her plotlines feel disconnected (I'm sorry Bardugo I respect you as a person, but shit-) is because the writing in SaB is just bad. I mean, nevermind the absolutely nauseating implications of the way she portrays the Grisha as a persecuted group who's situation is never actually fully addressed as it should be, considering Grisha rights is what her main villain is fighting for (imo for a series called the Grishaverse, LB seems to be pretty anti Grisha), but her characters and story alone are just wrong for each other. They don't fit together.
And the ending is one of the main pieces of evidence in that regard! You can’t say the ending where Alina isn’t Grisha anymore is her “going back to where she started” when she’s always been Grisha. She just didn’t know she was Grisha because she denied that part of herself that she was born with.
Alina is reluctant to move forward or change, she struggles with adapting, and she’s very set on the things she’s grown attached to throughout her life. She also has some latent prejudices against the Grisha, and so denies the possibility of being Grisha for those reasons as well.
Alina’s lack of powers in the beginning of her life because she willfully doesn’t learn about them to avoid change versus her lack of powers at the end of the book when she’s accepted them and then they’re stripped away from her by outer forces are two entirely separate circumstances. You can’t make a parallel about lost powers and lack of Grisha status bringing her back to the start when she was always Grisha and she always had powers and she simply refused to come to terms with it because of personal reasons.
The first situation is an internal conflict that indicates a story about growth and a journey of self acceptance. Denying herself the opportunity to learn about her heritage and to find acceptance with a group of people like her because she’s tied to the past and because of the way she was raised is the setup for a narrative that tackles unlearning prejudice and learning how to connect with a part of her identity that was denied her and learning how to grow independent and self assured. It’s the setup for a different story entirely. The second situation is an external conflict that centers around the ‘corrupting influence of power’... for some reason.
In a world where Grisha do not have social, political, or economic power and they are hunted, centering your heroine’s journey of self acceptance and growth around an external conflict about... the corrupting influence of power (in a group of people that don’t actually have any power?!) just doesn’t work. It is literally impossible to connect the two stories Bardugo is trying to push in Shadow and Bone without seriously damaging the main character’s developmental arc.
The only way a narrative like this would work, claiming that she has gone back to where she started, is either a) if the Grisha weren’t actually a persecuted group and instead were apart of the upper class, or b) if the one bad connection between the two instances is acknowledged - that Alina denied a part of herself crucial to self acceptance and growing up, and that losing her powers at the end has also denied her. It is a tragedy, not a happy ending.
Alina suffered because she didn’t use her powers. She grew sick. It was bad for her. This was not a resistance to 'the corruption of power and the burden of greed', it was her suffering because she couldn’t fully accept herself.
Framing the ending as a return to the beginning can’t be done if you don’t address how bad the beginning was for your main character. You brought her back to a bad point in her life. You regressed her. This should be a low point in her arc. It should be a problem that’s solved so she can finish developing organically or it should be something that is acknowledged as a tragedy in it’s own right, for the future the world (the writing) denied her.
This is a ramble and it makes no sense and I’m really sorry, but my point is that Bardugo put the wrong characters in the wrong story. The character arc required for organic development doesn’t match the story and intended message at all. The narrative doesn’t fit the cast. She's got two clashing stories attempting to work in tandem and she ends up with both conflicting messages that fans still can’t comprehend in her writing and an ending that doesn’t suit her main character to such an impossible degree that it’s almost laughable.
So yeah, there's a few reasons why I think the story and the plot feels so bad and disconnected. I hope you don't mind me making this answer so long! 😅 I was not expecting to write this much.
#shadow and bone#sab#grishaverse#alina starkov#aleksander morozova#mymetas#the darkling#baghra critical#anti leigh bardugo#sorry!#sab salt#sab meta#fandomcourse#negative#negativity#myramblings#asks and answers#joonmono#anti baghra#leigh bardugo critical#abuse tw#torture tw
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a lot of downer ship talk, very long, and i am begging you not to reblog this bc i am just talking about my own feelings on my own blog and don’t want to put bees in anybody’s bonnets
hmm but like. talking about Gisele’s conception of love and her inherent polyamorous orientation and worldview here made me think again about Thancred and why I rarely discuss or write Gisele/Thancred fic despite shipping it like burning and having a lot of feelings about it
their relationship arc was very different than with most other wols I’ve seen shipped with him, as a start. there were some heavy (albeit unintentional) parallels with Imani/Kaidan’s relationship arc in Mass Effect, what with one believing the other was dead for ages until they suddenly popped up again, and with Heavensward being their “Horizon moment”, though it wasn’t hostile so much as...many things left unspoken and hurt on Gisele’s part when Thancred inexplicably took this “I want my beloved to be happy so I will let her go” tack totally unasked and undiscussed solely bc of his intense feelings of guilt and his insecurities. and they didn’t reconcile until he damn near died in Amh Araeng all that time later on the First).
of course different isn’t bad, and I have to keep reminding myself that. lord knows fandom would be boring af if everyone wrote ships in the same way and I’m sure there’s an audience out there for this sort of thing, even if niche. but like...I really feel like myself and my wol stick out like a sore thumb in a sea of small white/light wols who are 100% monogamous with him (but for an occasional fridged Haurche before they got together). there is nothing wrong with writing that sort of thing but as a poly femme it’s just really demoralizing sometimes to consider that so many people seem to view Thancred’s promiscuity as a flaw that needs to be overcome somehow, that it was a sign of his emotional immaturity and that with proper character development and growth (and True Love from the right person) he will necessarily “settle down” into being monogamous. I see this idea expressed so frequently in fic and art and it hurts so much because it reminds me of nothing so much as the way Zev and Isabela got treated in da fandom (Zev’s actual romance in the game codified it as canon even), and it dredges up a lot of very old, very bad memories.i mean that one infamous scene at the Stones gets pointed to a lot but it’s like...the multiple gfs weren’t the problem, it was his lack of honesty about it. and it’s always contrasted with him in the latter stages of ShB, especially when it comes to the uri/than shippers. Weary Dadcred is wholly incompatible with Suave Thotcred to these people.
it’s like people think poly and/or promiscuous characters are not allowed to have any kind of depth or complexity, their romantic/sexual proclivities are treated as either something for laughs or a defect they need to work on. and I wholly, emphatically reject that not just wrt him but with Gisele also, her entire characterization and story absolutely puts the lie to that sort of thing. they do not and cannot relate to each other in that way. their conflicts were entirely down to his insecurities and a lack of communication on both their parts, not because they didn’t love each other enough because polyamory. shit, the whole reason Thancred couldn’t hate Haurchefant even though he rather irrationally wanted to at first was because of the compersion he felt seeing Gisele with him. and Gisele had been telling him to shit or get off the pot wrt Y’shtola for actual years.
but outside of like 1 or 2 people, I really don’t know anyone else who views him that way and so I feel like I need to make myself scarce in those corners of fandom. especially since I also highkey ship him and Minfilia W. like listen I never played 1.0 and went into ARR knowing fuck all about anything and thus them being all “ugh no we don’t feel that way about each other, why would you think that???” in that one “no hetero” scene made me feel like absolute garbage considering I had OT3′d them and Gisele literally right up to that point. It felt like the game itself was shaming me, and then I saw that it was very heavily frowned upon in fandom for Important Lore Reasons and I was quite new and intensely self-conscious about having Wrong Opinions so I just made myself stop and turned it into a V with Gisele as the shared point. And ftr ShB only made the angst worse because it reminded me of it and it was all I could read it as (romantic angst) and I started hurting about it all over again, in large part because I felt like I couldn’t discuss it with anybody at all for fear of being viewed as a freak. The only thing I permitted myself to do was mention OG Minfilia having unrequited feelings for him a la Phedre and Anafiel in the Kushiel books, with her never telling him because he would never have seen her that way. (Never mind that he did end up with Alcuin; and I know some view that as very, very sketchy given the circumstances but I take no issue with how it went down bc D’Angeline social mores were very clear on Alcuin’s agency as a free & consenting adult when he made that decision. But that’s apropos of nothing here bc Min was a grown ass woman in ARR so.)
anyway tl;dr i don’t feel like i or gisele especially belong in thancred enjoyer land bc of my weird and apparently controversial views about him as a character so I tend to stick with fussing over my painfully victorian & catholic elves in public instead. i don’t even have wips that don’t see the light of day, i just straight up don’t write them lol
#gisele surana#thancred tag#like they still don’t even have a ship tag#that’s how self-conscious i am about it#negativity cw#tbd probably
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