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personasintro · 7 months

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Mutual Help | #27

↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; in order for you to pretend to be his girlfriend, he helps you with your sexual desires ⏤ he calls it mutual help

⇢ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jungkook x reader

⇢ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fake dating au, fluff, angst, smut, slow burn

⇢ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: explicit language

⇢ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 6.9k+

⇠ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯. | 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ⇢

"I knew I would see you slacking off. Again."

It doesn't take long for you to recognize the teasing and edge to the very familiar voice, the one you could probably never get mistaken. Glancing at Yoongi who's walking towards you, an evident smirk glowing on his features as he rolls up the sleeves of his black button up.

"Bothering me again? Here I was thinking you finally left me alone." you murmur, audible enough for him to hear because that's exactly what you wanted but all he gives you is an amused chuckle.

You don't even bother explaining to him that you're just taking a ten minute break, before you've to make calls for upcoming photoshoots. It's not worth it and he wouldn't care for sure.

"Me? Never," he smirks, leaning against the window sill where you're standing glancing at the busy Seoul streets. "And you seem happier, so now I'm back."

It surprises you that he brought up the sudden change of your mood, even if his words were tactical and light without actually prying at what happened. You purse your lips, trying to hide a grin because this man is just unstoppable and unbelievable. From the corner of his eyes you notice the corner of his lips twitch as he stares at you with those sharp eyes.

"Such a shame. I was hoping you'd leave me alone for a few days at least." you joke, hearing him feigning a dramatic gasp that makes you snort as you both laugh.

"Well, I'm glad you got your humor back," he teases, wiggling his brows as you roll your eyes although a soft grin spreads on your lips. "But are you okay?" he asks, the teasing long gone from his voice as you stare at him with widened eyes.

He sounds genuine and--

"Min Yoongi, are you worried about me?" you ask, a grin making its way back onto your lips as Yoongi scoffs.

"Don't be ridiculous," he denies, scrunching his nose as if the mention of him being worried about you disgusts him. "I'm just curious, that's all."

"Uhm," you hum, smirking when he growls in disagreement. "But since you're so curious about me, yes, I'm okay." you answer, knowing that he's waiting for your answer nevertheless of your teasing and he nods in acknowledgement.

You're okay. When you woke up, unfortunately there were no signs of Jungkook because he had to wake up earlier than you. In a sleepy state, you can remember his alarm going off but you drifted back to sleep before you could pry your eyes open. Jungkook managed to turn off the alarm quickly, before it could wake you up entirely. However, this morning has been different because there was a small note waiting for you on the kitchen counter.

'I had to wake up earlier, we'll talk when I get home. Have a nice day, JK :)'

Just a simple note was enough to make your day a little bit better. Oh, who are you kidding. It made your day better a lot considering how worried you were about your friendship and Jungkook as well. You're glad you got to talk and understand each other better.

"Oh, I take it you got laid."

You almost choke at Yoongi's blunt words, your eyes scanning the break room which you're currently alone in. Thank god.

"No, I didn't!" you deny, but it sounds like a lie even to your ears and your very attentive co-worker seems to know that too as he starts grinning.

"Oh my god, you did!" he exclaims, grinning as you hiss at him, annoyance crossing on your features.

"So what?" you grumble. There's no point of denying it. Well, at least you tried. "You should get laid too, maybe it would help you with your attitude."

"Are you offering?" he asks right away, catching you off guard as your eyes almost bulge out.

Heat spreads over your cheeks as you suddenly imagine Yoongi naked, most likely being intimate with you but before you can get a proper image, you shake out of it. Fucks sake, this is your annoying co-worker. Why would you even imagine something like that? In your defense, he's the one who said it. Not you.

"Oh, you've a boyfriend." he pouts, causing you to roll your eyes. As if that makes any difference.

"He's not my boyfriend for fucks sake," you groan, "He's my best friend." you clarify, growing tired that for some reason he doesn't believe you.

You don't even know why that bothers you so much. Maybe it's the same thing when people would assume you were dating, but you weren't. You weren't having sex back then and they still thought you and Jungkook are secretly dating, or that you will. It always annoyed you and not just you. It annoyed Jungkook too but he had always been better at brushing it off, unlike you.

"Wasn't he your fuck buddy?" he feigns confusion and you're super close to slap him across his face.

Yoongi finds this entertaining as he's staring at you, seeing you twisting with discomfort written all over your face. Ah, he loves making you embarrassed. You always play tough around him, but he knows you're much more sensitive than you're showing him.

"Actually, I don't think he is. He's no longer my fuck buddy." you tell him, sounding almost proudly which catches Yoongi off guard and you see it by the way his lips part.

You and Jungkook still haven't justified your deal, but you both know it should've been over a long time ago. What happened last night – well, you had sex and that's it. There's nothing much to say about that. You both were horny, angry and it felt like angry sex is the right decision at that moment. It definitely helped you get that anger and irritation out of you.

"And that's why you are so happy?" he asks, sounding confused and surprised as you shrug.

"Not exactly. We talked yesterday and sorted some things out. He's probably getting back with his ex anyway. We both got what we wanted." you tell him, not really sure why you're so honest all of a sudden.

"And you're... fine with that?" he asks slowly, as if he's still trying to process your answer. Poor guy, he's confused and isn't trying to hide it at all. It's a rare moment to see him so confused and out of place.

"Why wouldn't I be? We had a deal, there are no hard feelings." you shrug.

It's understandable Yoongi is most likely confused and tries to put the pieces together. He doesn't know your whole deal after all. All he knows is that you've a best friend and you became friends with benefits for some time. And according to your words, that has ended.

"Shit, you're even crazier than I thought." he exclaims, causing you to frown as you glare at him.

"Thanks." you mutter sarcastically, ready to get back to work before Jinho notices you're gone longer than you should be. You don't need him to ruin your day.

"Hey," Yoongi calls out, causing you to stop as you glance at him. There's something about his features that make them look more softer as he glances at you. "I was just joking, you're not crazy."

You blink a couple of times, staring at the man that uncomfortably shifts on his spot as you lick your dry lips. "Thanks?"

"Maybe just a little bit." he says, his lips twitching as you snort.

"Aren't we all?" you ask, slowly backing away. "You really are growing soft on me." you joke, causing him to scoff immediately.

"Fuck off." he says as he hears your laugh. The middle finger you show him with you walking away while turned with your back to him doesn't go unnoticed by him too, a scoff of disbelief filling up the empty break room.

When you get back home, Jungkook's home, you're surprised by the sight of Jungkook himself. He's pacing around the living room, patting the pockets of his black slacks as he makes sure he has everything. You stare at him, legs bare and out of those awful heels that you were wearing the whole day, but you can't focus on the ache of your feet. It's hard to do so, especially when Jungkook looks extremely good. He always does, but there's just something about him wearing all black, especially that goddamn black button up exposing some of his chest. His black locks look natural but add just the right pinch of hotness to his whole look. It's the details too, like the silver earrings he usually wears and a shiny silver ring wrapped around his tattooed finger.

"Hi?" you call out, Jungkook's head snapping to yours as he finally notices you.

He gives you a big smile, greeting you right away as he reaches for his wallet before putting it into the pocket. "Hey, I was wondering when you'll get back." he says, voice light as he ruffles his hair.

"I had to go over Monday's plans with Yoongi, got caught up." you explain, giving him a small smile in return as his soft features twist in a mere confusion.

"Yoongi?"

"My co-worker." you answer, wondering if you've ever mentioned Yoongi's name. You probably didn't since he's asking. And there was no reason, you're glad you don't get to talk about him in your private life. It's just enough to bear with him almost every day.

"Ah," Jungkook hums, "Well, Jin texted me and the guys, and he wants to hang out tonight."

That would explain his outfit and obvious fact that he's about to leave.

"Oh, is he back from the honeymoon?" you ask, putting your bag onto the couch as if it's your daily routine every day coming back from work. That's because it is. You managed to have your own new routine ever since staying over at Jungkook's.

"Yeah, came back last week actually. They just had a little bit after the honeymoon phase," he chuckles.

Obviously, you know what that means. Sex, sex and a lot of sex.

"And now he wants to hang out with us. You wanna go with us?" he asks, waiting for your answer as you open your mouth in surprise.

It's probably all guys hanging out, you don't think they would mind if you came too but you wouldn't want to intrude. Not that Jungkook would mind anyway. You're touched that he's asking you to come too, considering that you would be left alone in his apartment. But you're tired, you don't mind relaxing. Although, you thought you'd talk tonight.

"Ah, no. Thank you though. I'm tired and I just wanna relax tonight." you assure him, knowing that if he saw any doubt on your face, he wouldn't let you live.

"You want me to stay with you? I can just text them and decline, I don't mind." he says, and your heart warms up all again but you shake your head.

"Don't be stupid. Have fun, go hang out with them. I'll just watch Netflix or something and then go to sleep. Do you have a ride back home? I assume you all will be drinking." you tell him, changing topic knowing he would question you for a couple more seconds.

He looks as if he's contemplating asking again but just shakes his head. "I'll just call a cab or something." he waves his hand.

"You sure? I can pick you up." you offer, but he shakes his head again.

"No, it's okay. I'll probably come back late. You should just go to sleep, don't worry about me." he smiles, walking towards you as he pokes your nose causing you to frown.

"My apartment is already fixed," you tell him, remembering the call you got around lunch time.

You hoped you'd be happier when the repairman called you and informed you that it's all good now, and you're free to move back in. Well, living with Jungkook has been nice. He's been cooking for you, more than you had for him. You helped with cleaning, but it's proven that Jungkook has everything under control and manages to clean everything on his own. Surprisingly, looking at the fact that Jungkook is a man, he's very clean and likes his things in their place. Oh, and he's been taking care of washing your clothes and now they smell like him. Not entirely, but the fabric softener he's always using.

"I'll go back tomorrow." you add, his doe eyes staring at you as he sighs.

"Oh, okay," he says, sounding disappointed. "I'll miss having you around though." he says, causing you to snort as you push his firm chest. Oh god.

"I barely did anything." you laugh, causing him to grin as he scrunches his nose.

"Believe it or not, but just having you around is enough."

"Oh my god, Jeon. You're such a sap." you snort, causing him to roll his eyes but there's an amused grin spreading on his lips.

"What? You don't believe me?" he wiggles his brows, pinching your cheeks as you slap his hands away causing him to put a little bit of pressure which makes you whine.

"Let go of me, Jeon!"

He does, but not before he starts cackling at your red cheeks and frustration filling your face. What a kid.

"But seriously, I'll miss you." he says, chuckling as he watches you rubbing your red cheeks to make the pinching feeling go away.

You glare at him, but how can you stay mad at him when he's scrunching his nose again as he's laughing at your expression. "I'm not dying, Kook. We can still hang out whenever we want." you remind him, growing soft that he really looks kind of bummed out that your apartment is fixed.

"I know that," he says, shrugging. "I hope you're not. Imagine if you were, who would I annoy?" he pouts fakely, causing you to raise your hand as you're ready to slap him but he's already anticipating it, dodging your hand with ease.

"Jimin or Taehyung? Or the hundreds of other friends you've." you murmur, giggling when he makes a grimace and shakes his head.

"None of them are like you," he says, voice soft but serious as he steps closer to you. Your breath hitches, anticipating his next move but you definitely don't expect him to poke you in your ribs as he lets out a cackle. "And you're too easy to annoy."

"I really hope that one day when you'll have kids, they'll annoy the shit out of you. You deserve it." you tell him seriously, only causing him to laugh as you're trying to hide your grin.

"Kids annoy the shit out of their parents anyway," he points out, shrugging as if your comment doesn't mean anything. "And your kids will annoy you too, don't think your kids won't be annoying just because it's you." he teases, causing you to roll your eyes as you shrug.

"We'll see, Jeon." you muse, pursing your lips while he snickers at you.

He stares at you for a couple of seconds, and you already know that look in his eyes. He lightly coughs, preparing himself for whatever he wants to talk about but you already have an idea what it might be. You wanted to talk after all.

"So..." he starts, nibbling on his bottom lip before he sighs and opens his mouth again. "What now?"

"What do you mean what now?" you ask, chuckling. "I guess our deal is off, isn't it? There's no point of us pretending to be dating. I'm guessing you've already agreed to meet with Kiko...?" you ask, a question lingering in the air for a couple of seconds as Jungkook nods.

"Well, we haven't set the date yet. She's visiting her parents right now. She told me she'll let me know when she's back." he explains, causing you to nod.

"But she agreed to meet up with you, right?" you ask just to be sure, earning a nod from Jungkook.

"Yeah, she did. I just don't know what to expect from it." he admits quietly, causing you to frown in a confusion as you glance at him.

He sighs, ruffling his hair as he walks up to the back of the couch and leans against it. Crossing his arms over his chest, you open your mouth to ask; "What do you mean? I thought you wanted to get back together with her."

Does he have any doubts about their relationship? About Kiko? That's hard to believe. He's been so determined and even though he was vocal about his recent thoughts with you and trusted you with his struggles and thoughts, there could always be something more. Love is confusing. Thank God, you're not going through the same thing he's going through right now. Even if he's the same Jungkook, teasing you and annoying you, you know his heart is cracked and he's trying to do the right thing by listening to it.

"I want to," he exclaims softly, almost sounding annoyed at himself. "But I told you... I don't know what will happen when I see her again. This time it'll be just the two of us again and the last time we were alone, just the two of us, she told me the most heartbreaking thing she probably could've said to me. I don't know how I'll feel about that. I've no fucking idea how I'll feel when we'll talk."

You look at him with a pity in your soft eyes. "Of course, you don't know. That's why you want to meet her and talk to her."

"I love her," he admits, like it's not obvious, "But a part of me wishes I'd hate her. It would make everything easier."

"Don't say that," you whisper, "You would be heartbroken either way." you tell him, walking towards him as you give him a tiny smile.

He's looking at you, eyes traveling all over your face as they stop at your eyes. He gives you a soft look, thankful even as the corner of his lips lifts up. "Yeah, maybe you're right. But hating someone is easier than loving someone who hurt you."

"Kook, you're not capable of hating someone. And by no means you're able to hate Kiko. You're just hurt and it's completely understandable. You know how you'll feel when you meet up with her. For now, just enjoy your night and don't stress yourself that much. I know it's easy for me to say but be with your friends, get drunk or something." you chuckle and he joins you, although it sounds pressured. Not that you're surprised.

"Come here," he says, already reaching towards you with his arms.

Taking two steps, he pulls you to his chest as he hugs you. Your nose is pressed against his chest, smelling the amazing and same cologne he always wears, the same one that smells like home. Because in a way, Jungkook is your home. Your friendship is so valuable, you've never had this kind of friendship with anyone.

Growing up, you had a best friend in primary school. He was cool and you got along with him better than with any of your girl friends. You remember when you used to order pizza almost every day after school. You'd try the one with seafood and examine little octopuses with a giggle before you ate them. Those are soft and nice memories. Until you both grew up and you stopped hanging out. He started hanging out with one of your other classmates, right before you went to high school. Then you heard he started smoking weed, not that defines him as a person but when you saw him in your home city, he looked... different. It wasn't the same boy you used to laugh and joke around with. He was someone else, he grew up just like you did.

But it's different with Jungkook. You might not know him from the complete childhood days, but long enough to remember the little pimples he used to have and the innocent look along with his big eyes, that remained the same. The only difference is that he's not a boy anymore, he's a man full of muscles while his skin is filled with a couple of tattoos decorating his right arm. His baby fat is no longer present and his jaw is sharp while his cheekbones are defined. And his appearance might've changed, but he still remains the same person. Yes, you got to see new sides of him (not just from the sexual side). He's no longer the innocent boy who blushed whenever a girl talked to him. Yet, he never changed towards you. No matter how many years passed, he's still the same.

Wrapping your arms around his frame, you smile into the hug.

"I feel bad for leaving you here alone. You sure you'll be fine?" he asks softly, mouth pressed against your hair.

"Yeah," you chuckle, "I'm tired. Have fun, Kook. We'll have fun some other time, I promise."

"I know we'll, we always do." he jokes, causing you to pull away so he can see the roll of your eyes. He mimics you and snickers when you want to push him away but he doesn't let you go, arms still wrapped around your body.

"So, I guess I'm no longer your fake girlfriend, huh?" you ask, chuckling when his eyes drop to your moving lips before they flicker back to your eyes.

"Yeah, I guess you're not," he chuckles, "Well, it was a pleasure to have you as my girlfriend." he jokes, causing you to snort.

"I'm sure it was," you snicker, "You're full of shit, Jeon."

Amused smirk adorns Jungkook's lips as he bites his lower lip. "I'm not, although your acting wasn't as great as I hoped it'd be." he jokes and you slap his back, the only available place for you where you can hit him.

He laughs, throwing his head back as squeezes you tighter. "My acting was perfect! Okay, the beginning wasn't that great but it wasn't my mistake!" you exclaim, laughing through your words as Jungkook nods with pursed lips, teasing you.

"Was I good with my part of the deal?" Jungkook asks, your body tensing for a second as you tilt your head to look at him.

"Are you seriously asking me if you were good at sex?" you ask with a chuckle, trying too hard not to let your cheeks flush. Fuck, you've no idea why you're so shy all of a sudden.

"No, I know I was great," he says, earning another roll of your eyes. Seriously, you can't with him. "I'm asking if I did everything you wanted." He sounds genuinely curious, but there's a dark glint in his eyes as he stares down at you, waiting for your response.

It's not helping that he's so close to you, your bodies pressed together. You can perfectly feel his warmth and you're suddenly remembered of all the times your bodies collided with each other. There's a sudden tingle between your legs and you've to shake yourself out of it before you can let it cloud your mind.

"Uhm," you hum, although there is something else that comes to your mind. For example, like there's a lot of things that you can think of. But you don't tell him that. But judging by Jungkook's weird chuckle and the way he frowns, he notices your short and unsure answer. "Our deal is off, remember?"

"Yeah, I know." he answers, slowly letting you go at the same time as his phone starts to vibrate in his pocket. "Sorry," he apologizes but you just wave it off and wait for him to answer the phone.

"Yeah?" There's a distant muffled voice that you recognize as Taehyung, although you can't hear him properly. "Yeah, yeah I'm going. See you soon," he ends the call as he gives you a tiny smile.

"It was Tae, they're already there." he informs you, but doesn't move an inch.

"Go," you laugh, nudging his shoulder as he chuckles. "Don't let them wait for too long. You know how impatient Taehyung gets."

"Knowing him, he'll be drunk by the time I get there." he jokes, causing you to laugh because you both know Taehyung. He likes to loosen up a lot lately.

"Oh god, don't let him get drunk like he got at Jin's wedding." you whine, remembering Jimin and Jungkook coming to the rescue because Taehyung got wasted and threw up all over the bathroom. Jungkook said the sight wasn't pretty and it was a good thing you stayed at the bar.

"I'll try," Jungkook promises, flicking your nose. "You can always tag along and babysit Tae." he jokes.

"No, thanks," you snort, "I'm sure you'll manage on your own. I trust you." you pat his chest before you turn around, seeing him grinning at you as he shakes his head.

As you're ready to grab your clothes from Jungkook's bedroom, you hear his keys rustling as he calls out to you. "I've my phone with me, don't hesitate to call me if something happens." he calls out to you, a laugh escaping from your mouth as you poke your head from the bedroom.

He's standing at the front door with a hand on the doorknob, big eyes looking at you innocently although his whole appearance screams the exact opposite.

"Don't worry, dad. I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself." you tell him, laughing when he stares at you in a mere horror.

"Don't call me that," he murmurs, "I know you can take care of yourself, just-- yeah, have a nice evening, okay?"

You look at him, a soft smile spreading on your lips as you give him a nod. "Of course, have fun." you call out to him, giving him a wave of your hand.

You see the dubious look on his face and you just know he's deciding if he really should go, and leave you alone. Your heart warms up at his kindness and before he can decide not to go and not to have an actual fun, which he really needs, you lock yourself in the bathroom and treat yourself to a steamy shower.

The blasting rap music sounds like a knife digging into Jungkook's earlobe, but the amount of alcohol flowing in his system makes one of the main sensory organs almost numb. Who would've thought a nice evening in the diner with his friends would erupt into a night full of clubbing, alcohol and loud music. Well, he could've predicted it. It always happens and deep down he knew their next steps after their stomachs are full, would lead to one of the clubs. Jin's back, glowing with happiness after the honeymoon as he didn't fail to spill some details to his friends. The mood has been great, ever since Jungkook stepped into the diner and his friends welcomed him while teasing him of his late arrival – which wasn't that late. He was only twenty minutes late but of course Taehyung teased him the most.

The whole evening seemed fun and nice, women throwing their eyes at Jungkook which he bluntly ignored and prayed none of those women would actually make their move. He would feel awful to turn down any of them, knowing they would be most likely embarrassed if he did that. Couple of drinks later when a painful realization of his current life hit him like a ton of bricks, he couldn't think about anything else than what's happening in his life.

"Jungkook," Jimin says, patting Jungkook's shoulder as he's sniffling trying to cover his face even though nobody could tell he's crying, considering the lack of light in the dimmed club. If it weren't for Jungkook's slumped figure and worried eyes of his friends, he'd just look like another drunk guy barely holding up.

Instead, he's a drunk guy with a broken heart that couldn't hold it in any longer.

"What's wrong? Please, don't cry." Jimin's worried voice fills Jungkook's ears but just as the loud and energetic rap music, it's numb to Jungkook's ears and he barely registers it.

"Jungkook, did something happen?" Taehyung asks, sitting next to him as he clutches his other shoulder in comfort. But he barely feels that, not registering his friends' voices as they're just another empty noise.

He hates himself, he's ruining the fun for his friends who came here to have fun and loosened up, not wanting to experience Jungkook's breakdown that he desperately tried to hide before they noticed it. Trying to act like everything's fine is harder when he's drunk and barely managing to control his emotions and features. He never expected to find himself in this situation, fuck, he never thought he would have this breakdown like a little heartbroken boy.

"No," he sniffles, stubbornly shaking his head as he denies quite the obvious. "I'm fine."

"It's us, Kookie. You don't have to lie in front of us," Jimin reminds him softly, his gentle voice carrying itself as it contrasts with the music. "Is it something with Y/N? Did you guys have a fight?"

Jungkook lifts his head up, staring into Jimin's worried and big eyes as he stares at his friend that sniffles and shakes his head. "No, we're good."

If Jimin remembers correctly and he does, he knows you and Jungkook had a fight or something weird happened at the camping trip. As much as you tried to put a smile on your face when he asked you about it, he's not stupid and is observing enough to notice that something happened. Of course, you both had to figure it out because he witnessed Jungkook buying you pads and tampons, seeming determined to buy you both just because he wasn't sure. It touched Jimin's heart and he's not even a fucking woman.

But it still breaks him to see his friend crying over something nobody knows about. And all of a sudden when just a few minutes ago he was laughing with the rest of them.

"You don't have to tell us if you don't want to," Taehyung reminds him, rubbing Jungkook's shoulder who lets out a defeated sigh. "Just let us know if you'll be okay."

Jimin nods, something Jungkook fails to see because of his head hanging low as he stares at his black boots. His whole body feels heavy, along with the alcohol settling in his stomach. Fuck, why he chose to eat that much? And drink too. He should've stopped himself, but he was having so much fun.

"It's Kiko." Jungkook murmurs, almost inaudibly but Jimin and Taehyung hear him perfectly as they look at each other confusingly, before Jungkook leans himself against the booth.

"Kiko?" Jimin doesn't hide his surprise. "What happened with her?"

"What happened?" Hoseok joins the rest of them, the three guys staring at Hoseok lapping for his breath as he spent a good thirty minutes dancing his heart out with some girls.

He frowns, worriedly glancing at Jungkook who just stares back at his older friend with a mere frown.

"I found out she cheated while we were dating." Jungkook answers, surprisingly completely clear and loud enough for everyone to hear.

Jimin gasps out in shock, Taehyung's mouth dropping as Hoseok's eyebrows shoot up in guilt and worry. Jimin sees the interaction, mouth dropping as well as he stares at Hoseok. "You knew?"

"Of course, he knew. He's Kiko's best friend." Taehyung comments, frowning at their hyung who seems guilter than ever. Especially when he sees the reddened eyes that belong to the youngest, pain visible in them.

"That's why she broke up with you?" Jimin asks Jungkook, glancing back at him but not before he glares at Hoseok. Jungkook gives them a slow nod, closing his eyes for a few moments. The pain is too much, he wishes he could just forget it and he reaches for Jimin's drink that he bought for himself but hasn't had the time to drink it, since he found Jungkook crying and all alone.

"What a bitch!" Taehyung exclaims, causing Jungkook to stop and snap his teary eyes at him while Hoseok glares the shit out of Taehyung.

"Hey!" Hoseok snaps, causing the younger man to shrug as he glares back. "It's... it's not my place to say anything. It's between you two, Jungkook." he reminds him, his voice softening.

"Are you seriously standing up for her when she cheated? What has Jungkook ever done to deserve that?" Taehyung asks, voice raising his voice as everyone stares at him with a shocked expression. Taehyung barely shows anger, if it's not a part of him playing a video game or something, so it is quite surprising to hear his deep voice getting frustrated and even more that it's aimed at Hoseok.

"Nothing," Hoseok sighs, "I'm not saying any of this is alright." he tells them gently, sitting down at the opposite of the table as he glances at Jungkook with a pitiful look.

"Well, you act like it." Taehyung murmurs, causing Jimin to sigh as he shakes his head.

"Tae," he warns him softly, standing up from his crouch position as he sits down next to Jungkook.

He watches Jungkook reach for his drink again but before he can even touch the cold glass, Jimin's already slapping Jungkook's hand away and moves the drink away from Jungkook's reach. "I think you've had enough."

Jungkook rolls his eyes but doesn't say anything as his head keeps dropping down. Thank god he's sitting down, at least he has some kind of stability now.

"I'm gonna grab some water for him." Hoseok says, excusing himself as he gives all of them a pitiful look again, looking guilty and sad at the same time.

"He does look miserable about this." Taehyung comments, watching Hoseok's figure disappearing in the crowd.

"Go easy on him, Tae. He doesn't have it easy, he's Kiko's best friend and Jungkook's friend." Jimin sighs, reminding Taehyung which makes Jungkook scoff. He heard similar words just a few days ago.

Whatever Taehyung's thinking, he stays silent and just lets out an exhausted sigh as he glances at Jungkook. He still looks miserable, the conversation bringing another set of memories and pain.

"I know it hurts, Kook. But look at the positive side, you've got Y/N. She would never--"

"We're not together." Jungkook slurs, both of his friends freezing.

"Wait, what?" Jimin asks, staring at Jungkook who seems to be spacing out as he curses when he falls forward and almost bumps his head into the table in front of him, if it weren't for Jimin's and Taehyung's fast reflexes. "What did you say?" Jimin presses, staring at Jungkook who grins lazily and closes his eyes.

"What about Y/N?" Taehyung tries, holding Jungkook in case he'd stumble forward again.

"Me and Y/N," he slurs, letting out a burp that makes him almost gag. "We're not together."

"What? You guys broke up?" Jimin exclaims, not believing his ears as Jungkook seems to live in his own little world, completely ignoring Jimin's question and reaction.

"Jungkook," Taehyung nudges Jungkook's shoulder. "You and Y/N broke up?" he asks, Jungkook eyes opening again as he processes Taehyung's question.

He sits there, staring dumbfounded in front of himself before he shrugs, remembering something. "Oh, yeah, we did." he sighs.

"What? When?" Taehyung asks, glancing at Jimin who looks just as shocked as he shrugs.

However, he's not the only one and Jungkook shrugs as well, not knowing how to answer that. What is he supposed to say? You did tell him that your deal is off today, well yesterday. It's already past midnight if he can remember.

"What about Y/N? Is she okay? Where is she?" Jimin asks, blurting out all these questions at Jungkook that makes him just shrug which causes Jimin to groan in annoyance. Talking with a drunk person is extremely hard, Jungkook is a perfect example of that.

"Fine," Jungkook slurs out, "She's fine."

"I've to call her. She's probably--"

"No," Jungkook says, trying to touch Jimin but he just pats with his hand awkwardly in front of Jimin as he stares at Jungkook with an arched brow.

"But where is she, Jungkook? I don't think a person can be fine after a breakup."

"She's at mine." Jungkook answers, Taehyung scoffing a chuckle as he seems to grow genuinely amused at the current situation. He wishes it wouldn't be so serious, maybe he'd actually laugh.

"What?" Jimin asks dumbfoundedly, "You broke up and she's at your place?"

"Yeah?" Jungkook asks, brows pinching confusingly as he looks at even more confused Jimin.

"You're an idiot. You broke up, she's at yours and you're partying here?"

"She didn't want to go." Jungkook answers innocently, shrugging slowly.

"Oh my god, Jungkook," Jimin exclaims, slapping his forehead. "Of course, she didn't. You broke up! Why the fuck is she even at yours?"

Jungkook shrugs causing Jimin to groan. "And don't shrug all the time!"

"Okay." Jungkook sighs, head hanging low as he lets out a defeated sigh.

Taehyung snickers, patting Jungkook's shoulder. "Don't yell at him, Jiminie. He's drunk as fuck."

Jimin sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I've to call her."

"No, she's fine," Jungkook waves his hand. "She's probably sleeping."

Jimin stares at Jungkook, wondering if he wants to let out a desperate sigh or laugh at Jungkook's drunkenness. He doesn't do either, simply sitting in silence for a moment. It's his sudden silenced cries and sniffles that snap both men into action, Taehyung rubbing Jungkook's shoulder as Jimin sighs.

"I'm gonna take him home." he informs Taehyung, not thinking Jungkook is paying attention to both of them and definitely not to what neither of them are saying.

"You drank, you can't drive." Taehyung says, still rubbing Jungkook's shoulder as he gives him another glance of worry and pity.

"Of course, I won't drive. I'm not stupid Tae," Jimin tells his friend, "I'm gonna call us a cab and then come back here."

Taehyung is ready to nod, thinking it's probably best for Jungkook to sleep it through. He won't enjoy this night anyway, not in this state. They all will probably go home soon and Jungkook looks like he'll either throw up or fall asleep any minute. They can just pray he won't be throwing up in a cab, maybe Jimin should try to make him throw up before they'll actually hop into a cab.

"No," Jungkook disagrees, shaking his head. "No, no cab."

"Kook, we've got to get you home." Jimin reminds him softly, pulling out his phone as Jungkook gives him a glare before he burps.

He slurs something, so quiet that both men stare at him with a dumbfounded gaze, wondering what the hell he just said. Taehyung asks him to repeat it, causing the younger and drunk man to blink a couple of times before he says it again.

"Y/N," he says simply, burping again as he covers his mouth with a hand. "Call Y/N."

"Jungkook, she's most likely sleeping, you said it yourself. Let her sleep, let's not wake her up." Jimin says, wondering when the fuck has Jungkook grown so stubborn. He's always been stubborn when it came to work or his determination, but not in these kinds of scenarios. But then, those scenarios where Jungkook would get drunk and emotional never really happened.

"Call her." he snaps, causing Jimin to groan as he throws his head back.

"You're selfish, you know that right?" Jimin mumbles, chuckling when Jungkook scoffs in response and crosses his arms over his chest.

"For fucks sake, just call her." Taehyung tells Jimin, causing the both friends to glare at each other as Jimin fumbles with his phone with an unsure expression.

"You heard him," Jungkook says innocently, "Call her."

"God, you're so annoying. No wonder you guys broke up," Jimin mumbles, but not inaudible enough for him not to hear.

"Hey!" Jungkook exclaims pouting before he stares into the distance, nibbling on his bottom lip.

"You okay?" Taehyung asks, leaning forward to get a better glance at his friend's face as he sees tears falling down his cheeks.

"I can't believe she cheated on me," Jungkook cries out, falling onto Taehyung's side as he drops his head onto his shoulder and starts letting out soft cries. "Why?"

Taehyung looks at Jimin, both sharing the same look of pity by the evident heartbreak of their youngest friend that awfully reminds them of the very moment they both found out Kiko broke up with him. The only difference was that Jungkook was too stubborn to actually cry in front of them. And he wasn't drunk, but still the pain in the ass before you came to the rescue. Even though Jungkook's reaction might've been different, they can notice the pain and heartbreak in both of them. And just like before, they both look at each other while Jungkook's soft cries are muffled by the loud music that slowly blends into the background.

Taehyung opens his mouth; "Call her." Is all he says before Jimin is already searching for your number as Hoseok is coming back with the bottle of water which Jungkook refuses and almost throws it back at him, calling him a liar.This whole night became a mess, a heartbreaking mess for Jungkook and nothing seems to help. You're the only hope they all have left. Again.

#jungkook x reader #bts smut #bts angst #bts fluff #bts au #jungkook fic #jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #jungkook au #personasintro

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inkdrinkerworld · 4 months

Note

throwing up bc i can’t stop thinking about dealer!remus and r high and spending new years together bc they just want it to be them two and them being each others new years kiss and using that as a way to make a move on each other bc they were too scared to do anything before pleaSe sedate me

No because why didn’t I have a dealer!remus to kiss me breathless for the new year??!

There’s a frog in your throat. There usually isn’t when you’re alone, but there always seems to be a lump in your throat when you’re with Remus that no amount of affection for him will lessen.

In fact, it seems that the more affection you harbor for him the bigger the lump grows.

You’re sitting on his sofa, in a sparkly New Year’s Eve midi dress and tall socks that are hidden under a fleece blanket.

Remus is in dark slacks and a white shirt- both outfits remnants of the party you’d both escaped from.

“Sure you don’t want a sweater, dove?” Remus asked as he’d undid his tie and honestly, a sweater would’ve been so much worse than suffering in your sequin dress that’s scratching the sliver of skin exposed of your thighs.

“The blanket’s fine, Remmy,” you’d promised, mostly because the idea of being in a sweater that smelled exactly like Remus- a little like his detergent, his citrus and pepper perfume and weed, would’ve made you even more of a mess.

Currently, you’ve got a blunt hanging from your lips, content to have the smoke billow from your mouth and around your head.

Remus is halfway done with his own, watching you mostly as he lets the last bit of the weed burn out.

“There’s something wrong with my hands, Remus.” You say, and he supposes that there should be more urgency in your words, but you get this even softer, mushy quality about you when you’re high that makes every thought seem like nothing.

“What’s wrong with them?” He asks, turning his body so he’s facing you. Your knees knock as you turn to him too.

“Can’t move them,” the blunt almost falls from your lips, and truly your arms feel like lead. Remus catches it before it falls, holding it close to your mouth in case you still want a pull. “Thanks.”

You’re always earnest and shy, but it only seems to become that much more endearing when you smoke, and Remus finds he loves it even more.

The way every word sound wistful, the way your eyes blink up at him slowly like you’re trying to stare at him for as long as possible.

“You’re really pretty, Remus. Which is strange for men,” you say it thoughtfully, like you’ve been thinking it forever.

You’re not sure why you can’t stop talking, or ally you’ve a lot less words to use; but tonight it seems resolutions have come earlier.

“Yeah?” Remus smiles as you nod and take a drag before exhaling.

“Yeah, and your lips, they’re so pretty.” If your hands were working you’d probably reach out to touch the thin scar that slices through his lip, but right now you can’t and maybe it’s a blessing.

Unconsciously, you lean into Remus some more, your thigh covering his knee.

“You’ve got a better pair, pretty girl.” Remus insists and your eyes widen. It’s funny that you seem to find the compliment unhinged.

The distance closes some more.

“Yeah?”

Suddenly, you and Remus are almost lip to lip, noses brushing.

“Yes, dovey,” he murmurs, his lips brushing yours and before he can even ask, you close the distance.

The kiss is shy, an experimental press and then you pull back. Remus doesn’t let you get far and sets the blunt into the ashtray before grabbing the back of your neck to pull you back to him.

It’s a kiss not like what you’d expected; Remus tastes like weed, but there’s something else and it fogs your head even more than the high grade you’d just been smoking.

The kiss is slow but deep, a dance Remus leads with ease. His fingers tangle in your hair to keep you in place and yours finally seem to work again and climb the back of his shirt.

“Happy New Year, dove.” He pulls away and is almost as breathless as you are, the light of the fireworks being set off brightening the window behind you.

“Happy New Year, Rem,” you hide your face in his chest when you catch your breath and Remus chuckles. “Dunno why you’re laughing. Can’t kiss a girl like that and not expect her to get flustered.”

That only makes him laugh even more. Remus’ hands rub down your back.

“You’d get flustered if I only looked at you baby, let’s not pretend.”

#remuslupin #remus lupin #remus lupin one shot #remus lupin drabble #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin blurb #remus lupin fic #remus lupin x black!reader #remus lupin x high!reader #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x yn #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin imagine #dealer!remus #dealer!remus lupin

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slxsherr · 1 year

Text

Tonight I Feel Like More

read part I here and part III here

pairing: charlie walker x bimbo!fem!reader

summary: you attend your first ever stab-a-thon, and finally make it through all of the movies, so charlie gives you a reward under the guise of keeping you warm.

wc: 2014

warnings: fem!reader, cursing/swearing, mentions of alcohol, mentions of oral sex (m! receiving), public sex, unprotected sex (p in v), mentions of crying, creampie

a/n: reader is described as being taller than charlie while wearing heels i'm sorry if you're short just pretend you're wearing ridiculously high heels 😭

Since your first movie night with Charlie, it’s been his mission to finish all of the Stab movies with you. Which wouldn’t be so hard if you could get past Stab 5, but the whole time travel plot confuses you, which means you get bored, and Charlie has come to realize that your boredom manifests in a rather, promiscuous way.

The first time you only lasted twenty minutes before you were pulling down his pants and busying yourself with his cock, bobbing your head and hollowing your cheeks until you were swallowing his load. After that, the last thing on either of your minds’ was the movie.

He tries again and again, but somehow, someway, you get lost. He thinks he should feel lucky, having a girlfriend as frisky as you, and for the most part he does. But he’s worried, with Stab-A-Thon coming up he knows you’d want to go and support him at his last film festival.

What worries him is that at some point throughout the night you’re gonna get bored, and then he’ll have to find a secluded area of of wherever they decide to throw the party to fuck you silly. A problem he never thought he’d have, but he keeps it in mind while discussing venue options with Robbie.

Eventually they settle on an abandoned farm, far enough to not be bothered by adults, but not too far to the point where the drive is a hassle. They scope out the farmhouse, making sure it’s not too rundown for a gathering of drunk teens. It’s their last year of high school, last year running Cinema Club, last time throwing Stab-A-Thon, and Charlie and Robbie want to go all out.

On the day of, a few more involved club members help Charlie and Robbie set up for Stab-A-Thon, handling decorations and seating while Charlie and Robbie focus on the audio and visual. Before people start arriving, Charlie adds some yellow police tape to the stairs leading up to the hayloft, spewing bullshit about not wanting a drunk idiot to fall when someone asks, not wanting to say the real reason.

As soon as the sun falls over the horizon cars start to pull up, teenagers filing in with drinks, talking over the loud music as they wait for the movies to start. You arrive with Kirby and her friends, visibly annoyed by Jill and Trevor fighting behind you, most likely having had to listen to them argue the whole ride over.

You find Charlie before he spots you, quickly making your way to him through throngs of people, desperate to get away from relationship drama, not wanting it to rub off on you and Charlie. The closer you get to him, the easier it is for him to notice you. You’re dolled up more than usual, pretty makeup and hair he’s gonna feel guilty about ruining later, a short dress barely reaching past your ass, and matching heels that have you standing taller than him.

Most guys would probably be upset by that, but he can’t find it in himself to care when you slot yourself at his side, leaning in to give him a kiss. Your lipgloss is sweet, strawberry or cherry if he had to guess, a thin layer sticking to his own lips when you pull away. Your smile is even sweeter, eyes shining when they meet his, and he’s reminded of the phrase ‘the lights are on but no one’s home’, a perfect description of what goes on in your head.

He can tell you planned your outfit for fashion over function, which is the case for most of your outfits. If you’re not whining in his ear to sneak off he’s sure you’ll be complaining about being cold. But he lets those thoughts fade, focusing instead on your warmth at his side, offering you a sip of his drink.

“What time do the movies start?” You ask, face scrunched up at the bitter taste of whatever alcohol was poured into the jungle juice.

“Shouldn’t be long now,” Charlie answers, pulling his hand out of his pocket to wrap around your waist, bringing you closer to him.

“Actually, we should probably get up there and do our kickoff,” Robbie says, seeing the seats mostly filled in.

“Be right back,” Charlie whispers to you, following Robbie to the projector screen.

Their introduction is short and sweet, poking fun at the franchise’s clichés, while also promoting underage drinking. The crowd cheers, ready for the movies to start, quoting the iconic opening scene as Charlie and Robbie make their way to the back of the crowd to the projectors. You’re sitting on some bales of hay set up for seating, thin blankets keeping the itchy straw from irritating your skin, confusion etched in your features when you see Charlie walk out of the room instead of joining you.

Before you can follow him, Robbie takes a seat next to you, going into a rant about the movie that you only half listen to, convinced Charlie has given you the same rant during one of your private movie nights. You don’t have a chance to interrupt him and ask about Charlie though, jerking away when you feel an arm around your shoulder.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” Charlie laughs at your reaction, sitting down next to you. “Got you a drink,” he says, offering you a red cup.

“Thank you,” you say, beaming at him, leaning in for another kiss.

“Uh-uh, watch the movie,” he says, refocusing your attention to the screen.

You roll your eyes, but do as he says, watching the movie silently. The two of you sip on your drinks, moving closer together as more people join you on the bales of hay. By the time the second movie starts, you’re forced into Charlie’s lap after getting up for refills and losing your spot. Not that you mind, sat sideways on his lap and tucked into his chest, you’re surprisingly able to focus on the movies for once.

He entertains you, imitating the killer’s voice and repeating the dialogue for only you to hear, his breath tickling your ear as he whispers the lines. Your giggles are muffled by his chest, his playfulness and the steady beat of his heart comforting you through the jumpscares and violence that you’re still getting used to.

The two of you allow yourself to relax into one another, comfortably watching each movie as the crowd slowly dwindles. You’ve traded your jungle juice for soda, caffeine and sugar slowly sobering any tipsiness as dawn approaches, eyes blinking slowly as you both fight off sleep. You’re so close, the closest you’ve ever been to finishing all seven Stab movies, and he can’t help but bounce his leg nervously, your whole body shaking from the force of his movement.

“Stop that,” you mumble, and he does, but it’s not long before his leg is shaking again. “I thought you’ve seen all of these before, shouldn’t I be the nervous one?” You tease him when he still doesn’t stop.

“Shh, pay attention,” he scolds you, because it’s the final act of the last movie, and you’ve come so far.

You don’t put up a fight, attention easily grabbed as the kill scenes get messier and the main cast dies off one by one. Charlie’s buzzing with excitement during the last few minutes of the movie, watching for your reaction. Your reaction is dampened by your exhaustion, but even the slightest tell of shock has his lips stretching into a smile, holding you closer as the credits begin to roll.

“Wow,” is all you say, stretching out in his arms.

“Well, how do you feel?” He asks you, leaning over you as you lay back.

“Scared, tired, a little cold,” you answer, his hair tickling your skin as his face nears yours.

“Hm, well let’s go to bed then,” he says, sitting up and pulling you up with him.

You follow him to a set of taped off stairs, a thin blanket dragging on the straw covered floor behind him. He holds your hand all the way up the stairs, not wanting you to trip in your heels, spreading the blanket out over the loose stack of hay. The two of you fall onto your makeshift bed for the night, or early morning, laying on your sides as he pulls your back to his chest.

“How about now?” He asks, arms holding you close to him.

“Less scared, less tired, more cold,” you answer, wishing you had also grabbed a blanket.

“Let me warm you up then,” Charlie says, an impish smile on his face as one of his hands moves between your thighs, tickling your skin as his touch trails up.

“Really? Right now?” You ask, and he can’t tell if you’re excited or not, words slurring from exhaustion.

“Only if you want me to,” he answers, teasing your inner thighs, pushing the hem of your dress up.

“Of course I want you to,” you say, his advances reassured as you open your legs for him.

Since your first night together, both of you have learned a lot about each other’s sexual preferences. Although Charlie doesn’t have much experience, he found that it doesn’t take much to turn you on. You’re rather needy, and despite being the one guiding him most of the time, he’s the one doing all the work. Not that he minds.

When he dips his fingers past the waistband of your panties, he’s not surprised to find that you’re already wet, teasing your clit with soft circles as his other hand gropes your tits over your dress. Your hips buck in pleasure, thighs closing around his hand as your leg falls from the force of gravity, ass barely grinding back against him as you seek friction.

“You did so good tonight,” he says, undoing his jeans to pull them down. “Finally watching all of the movies like I asked,” he says, thick head of his cock stretching your slick walls as he pushes into you, your panties merely pulled to the side.

“Anything for you, baby,” you say, pushing back against him, needing to feel him deeper.

His hands hold your hips in place as he thrusts into you, building speed and tempo as he stifles his groans by marking your neck. You bite your fist, painfully aware of the people asleep just beneath the hayloft, struggling to keep your voice down. It’s unfair, Charlie thinks, how good you feel wrapped around him, milking him as you get closer to orgasm.

“What’s that?” He asks, hearing you mumbling something through your fist.

“Harder, please,” you moan, hiding your face in the blanket.

He holds you against him tighter, hips bruising your ass as he fucks you harder. It’s almost like you’re running away from him, grasping at the straw beside you, failing to silence your moans. He has to move one of his hands over your mouth, hearing your voice begin to echo, his other hand holding your hips in place.

Where once the cold nipped at your skin, you’re now sweltering, Charlie’s body heat warming you up from the inside out. With the way he’s pounding into you now, there’s not much you can think about aside from the way the tip of his cock kisses your cervix with each thrust, how it makes heat flare in your belly, and that you’re so fucking close. You don’t realize you’re crying, your vision having gone blurry a while ago, but now you’re seeing stars, hurtling over the edge as he chases his own pleasure.

You’re limp, twitching in his hold, drool and lipgloss smeared against the palm of his hand. It doesn’t take long for him to finish after you, grinding his release into you as he fills you with his hot cum. You whimper from the overstimulation, breathing heavily as both of you ride out the high.

“Goodnight, baby,” Charlie whispers, arms relaxing around you as you both begin drifting off to sleep, still buried deep within you.

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kaizensluvr · 1 year

Note

heyy hope ur well! can i request aib characters x gender neutral reader who experiences nightmares from the games

aib men comforting gn reader who experiences nightmares

author note! hi thanks for requesting ❤️ this will be in two parts. but anyways, enjoy.

ryohei arisu ㅤ

- he is scared when he sees you frantically kicking and screaming beside him

- immediately he leans over and grabs both of your arms to start shaking you

- you’re startled and so confused, so you keep kicking and end up sobbing

-wraps you in his arms and reassures you telling you that you’re safe with him

- he’s actually flustered when you stop crying as soon as he says that.. does he make you feel protected?

- holds you tightly on his chest and will ask you about your dream tomorrow, for now he needs you getting rest

shuntaro chishiya

- boys confused at first but once he realizes what’s up he is full on bf mode

- he makes you hold his hand and does breathing exercises until you calm down

- once he is sure you’re ready to be alone for a second he goes to the bathroom and gets a cold towel for your head ㅤ

- will keep asking you how you feel and he wants to hear you talk about your dream

- since he knows you so well, he knows you’ll get tired from talking and just want to sleep again

- will hold your hand until you’re asleep, and whisper words he can only dream to be able to say.. one day he will finally open up ㅤ

suguru niragi ㅤ

- he wakes up to your screaming and crying in fight or flight mode and we’ll of course chooses fight.. “y/n what the hell who’s here!?!”ㅤ

- scans the room, picks up his gun, then sees ur body wailing over nothing

- he quickly wraps himself around you and starts shaking you but then he remembers what happened last time where you punched him

- the man is freaking out so he just gently grabs your hands and starts hitting them (again, gently)

- as soon as you wake up and realize it’s niragi, you pull him in for a hug ㅤ ㅤㅤ

- pulls you onto his lap and tells you “there’s nothing to be afraid of, my baby” as he kisses your neck up to your face until you just end up falling asleep in his lap

aguni morizono ㅤ

- he’s gonna think you’re being attacked, i mean you kinda are ig ㅤ

- you’ll hear him say “honey! why are you scared?!” and he will instinctively hold you to his chest ㅤ ㅤㅤ

- then he’s like oh a nightmare and he will rub your back while whispering to you affirmations

- as you are frantically telling him snippets of your dream he can’t even pay attention cuz he hates seeing his baby cry

- will just end up shushing you and cuddling you, will try to stay up even as you fall asleep just in case it happens again, which it doesn’t since he’s holding you so safely <3

tatakora samura / the last boss

- he is prepared bc of the last time and as soon as he hears you scream he just looks at you and calmly says your name while holding onto you firmly

- hates seeing you like this and ends up telling you stories about his life as he plays with your hair ㅤ ㅤㅤ

- will get you anything you need, a glass of water, a snack, even just a kiss

- hearing his voice puts you in a trance and you fall asleep to the sensation on your head as he whispers good night and kisses your cheek

- he’ll end up being the big spoon as you’re protected in his arms

chota segawa

- first he’s super worried and terrified and confused

- will turn his head scanning the room and once he sees nothings there he just goes and grabs you and starts shaking you

- “y/n!! wake up! it’s just a dream!” and once you wake up he’s gonna stroke your hair

- he’s taking it very seriously rn, but i’m sure later on he will tease you about it (wants to see u laugh)

- he’s not sure how to calm u don’t exactly cuz it still feels so real so he will cuddle you and just have u sleep like on his arm kinda

daikichi karube

- he knows what you’re experiencing so he doesn’t freak out when he wakes up to you kicking him and panicking

- he will grab your hand while sternly saying your name and once your conscious he’s gonna just be like “it’s not real y/n. you’re okay i got you now darling” and you find his voice soothing

- pulls you onto his chest so you can calm down by hearing his heartbeat as he whispers sweet words into your ears

- he’s gonna rub your back till you’re sleeping and hold your head

- just wants you to smile and get good sleep

#arisu x reader #chishiya x reader #aguni x reader #niragi x reader #last boss x reader #aib x reader #aib scenarios #chishiya fluff #alice in borderland #alice in borderland x reader #chota x reader #karube x reader

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one-britt-to-rule-them-all · 7 months

Text

Jack Howl in heat

Character: Jack Howl [Twisted Wonderland]

Genre: NSFW

CW: | Fem!Reader | Wolf mating behaviour | Jack being in heat |

Format: Drabble

Word Count: 2.5K

Disclaimer: All characters are portrayed as legal adults.

Minors, DNI. NSFW content below.

He finally had you all to himself. He had you away from the two blithering, Heartslabyul morons that were continuously glued to your side, away from your screeching little pet, and away from every student vying for your affection and attention. Tonight, Jack had you all to himself.

In the dead of night, he found himself in your bedroom at Ramshackle, away from Savanaclaw. Over his dead body, Jack would let the other beastmen get a whiff of your potent scent.

Maybe he should have told you of his “predicament” beforehand, but for the reserved wolf beastman, it was an embarrassing thing to admit. But hey, even though Jack hadn’t outright told you what was going on, you had been receptive to every single one of his advances — a good sign. He’d been holding back for a while, but his patience had reached a boiling point, and now was the time to go in for the kill.

Had you been more well-read on wolf behaviour, you would have put two and two together. Maybe you should have done more research on wolves the moment you began dating a wolf beastman, but alas, you did not. Naively, it didn’t quite cross your mind that Jack’s wolf features extended beyond aesthetics.

The night had started simple; just you and your lover in bed, Jack resting on his back as your head laid on his chest. A muscular arm was draped around your neck, holding you. You thought Jack seemed a little tense — stiff and heart rattling against his rib cage, but he was the one to initiate this impromptu cuddle session, so you weren’t quite sure what had him in a tizzy.

And, although very quiet, you were sure you could hear quiet little whines coming from Jack. The sound was so uncharacteristic to hear from him that you’d lifted yourself from his chest, looking at him with a questioning gaze and a tilt of your head.

“Jack…? You okay?” You asked.

He didn’t offer much of an answer, only a grunt as he clenched his eyes shut and tensed his jaw. Unbeknownst to you, Jack was fighting against his instincts. The primal urges in him begged him to throw you down, manhandle you and mount you to ram his aching cock deep inside you. But he wanted to do this right.

Honestly, he’d have to pat himself on the back for the self-restraint he’s showing… especially with your scent invading his senses.

Instead, he sat up, looking you in the eyes with his usual intense and hardened gaze, yet it seemed even more piercing than usual, completely lost in thought as he tried to gauge the right moment. The words ‘Should I?’ were echoing in his mind.

But his patience wavered, and it was now or never to go for it.

Leaning in, Jack pressed his lips against yours in a seemingly innocent, quick kiss that you immediately reciprocated. Then came a second kiss and a third until your lips began melding together in a heated make-out session that grew in fervour and intensity as the seconds ticked by. His arms snaked around your back, pulling you flush against his broad chest.

You let him take the lead, revelling in the passionate affection Jack was offering you.

It wasn’t that Jack despised affection or anything of the like. Coming off as cold and distant, he was reserved and was never one to show much emotion; instead, he chose to keep a rugged exterior and front despite the warmth he held within his heart for those who had earned his respect. You were okay with that, finding his “tsundere” ways rather amusing once you found out just how easily flustered the wolf beastman could genuinely be when called out on his obvious facade.

Needless to say, Jack had you like putty in his hands with this sudden burst of assertiveness, pressing his body against yours and giving you some of the hottest open-mouth kisses you’ve ever received.

Then, you found yourself being lowered on your back, Jack hovering over your body and panting as he looked at you in a way that was comparable to a predator staring down its prey.

He lowered himself closer to your face, opting to rub his nose against yours in a surprisingly cute display of affection that had you laughing softly. The sound caused Jack’s ears to flatten against his head, somewhat embarrassed by your reaction to his behaviour, yet he felt so relieved to finally act on his instincts.

He rubbed his face on yours before dipping lower to your neck, where he continued to nuzzle you. You would have continued giggling at the ticklish sensation, but your laughter was abruptly cut off by a soft moan slipping your lips as his tongue glided against your skin, licking with fervour.

Like an animal grooming his m– oh. The gears in your head began turning, and you had an inkling of what had gotten into Jack.

Against your leg, you could feel the sizeable bulge in Jack’s pants rubbing against you. Slowly rocking his hips, you could feel him humping your leg as he grunted against your neck. You couldn’t fool yourself: you were also aching between your legs.

And oh, you certainly weren’t fooling Jack. Halting his movements on your neck, he raised his nose and sniffed the air. As the scent of your arousal hit him, Jack’s ears flattened as he clenched his eyes closed and grit his teeth, a guttural growl rumbling from deep within his chest.

“… ‘M in heat,” he finally admitted, ears still flat as he refused to look you in the eye. His cheeks flushed a very light red, breaths coming out heavy.

Ah. That’s what you thought. His behaviour leading up to this moment now made sense.

“Why didn’t you say so? You big dope…” you said. “Come here.”

He sighed in relief as you gave him the green light, whining as his cock jumped when another wave of your scent invaded his senses. Ah, Seven, he needed you bad.

Before you knew it, you found yourself stripped of your clothes, thighs spread and held wide open by Jack’s tight grip. Panting, he stared long and hard at your glistening cunt, licking his lips. Lowering his head between your legs, he pressed his nose against your folds and inhaled your scent — an act of marking for wolves. The sudden act had your cheeks flushing with mild bashfulness.

Fuck — Jack couldn’t get enough of your scent, grunting and groaning with satisfaction as he took in your pheromones. He could smell how ready and willing you were for him to mate with him. His tongue slipped out, sloppily lapping at your slick pussy. He knew from your scent alone that you were ready for him, but he needed a taste of those potent pheromones of yours.

“Mm… J-Jack,” you moaned, gripping his hair.

He grunted in appreciation, drunk off your pussy. He stopped momentarily, inhaling your scent again before licking you again, marking you as his with every lick. You’d smell like him, and every beastman in Savanaclaw would step aside whenever you’d walk by. They’d all smell the unmistakable scent of a wolf’s claim. Even Leona himself would think twice about approaching you. Jack would make sure of it.

When finally satisfied, Jack pulled away from his spot between your legs, making you whine at the loss of contact. You writhed, spreading your legs further in an attempt to entice Jack to come back; your swollen clit throbbed, needy for release.

Jack gripped your hips, a flush of red painting his tanned cheeks as he took a moment to admire his work: your cunt all puffy and needy, dripping with a mixture of your arousal and his saliva. He sniffed the air again, satisfied to smell himself on you.

“Can’t hold back anymore… s’too much,” Jack said in a low tone, almost in a growl.

You yelped a bit as Jack flipped you over and onto your stomach with impressive strength. His large, rugged hands gripped at your flesh as he handled you, placing you in the exact position he wanted you. Maybe a little clichéd for a wolf to want to fuck you in doggy style, but it was instinctual for Jack — the perfect position for optimal mounting.

Not that you were complaining. It wasn’t like you’ve never thought of getting “face down, ass up” for this man.

The tension was thick as Jack’s clawed hands slid along your skin, gripping your ass and spreading your cheeks to get another good look. You could hear the sound of clinking metal as Jack undid his belt, a quiet “fuck” escaping him as he freed himself from the confines of his pants.

You inhaled sharply as the weight of his large cock – fuck, he was big – slid against your wet folds. Surprise filled your being as you felt a distinct bulge at the base of his dick, causing you to look over your shoulder.

“I… have a knot,” Jack admitted, almost sounding embarrassed. “It’s a canine thing.”

That made sense, and you’d be lying to yourself if you said you weren’t at all curious to take it. You could hardly wait to try something so… foreign to you. Men back in your world didn’t have knots, after all.

“Jack, please…”

And as needy and desperate as Jack was at that moment, you didn’t have to beg any further. With a steady grip on your hips, he slid his cock into your depths, stretching you out oh-so beautifully. The wolfman was in fucking heaven — your warmth, the tightness of your pretty little cunt pulled a primal growl from deep within his chest, sending shivers down your spine.

Large and rough hands held onto your hips with a tight grip, claws somewhat digging into your skin as if trying to ground himself — to prevent himself from pounding you, instead giving steady and shallow thrusts to ease himself slowly, allowing your pussy the time to adjust and accommodate his size.

Then came his knot, and fuck, your jaw fell slack as your breath caught in your throat in a breathless moan. If you thought Jack’s cock was thick, then you had no words to describe his knot.

“Almost there, babe…” Jack grunted.

And with one final, hard thrust, Jack’s hips were flush against your ass, knot stretching your walls beyond anything you’ve ever felt before. Ever the caring boyfriend, Jack allowed you a moment to adjust to the sudden, foreign intrusion and to catch your breath — heaven knows you’ll need it for the fucking coming your way.

Because as soon as you gave Jack the go-ahead, the room was filled with the lewd sounds of your wet pussy being ravaged by Jack. With his strength, Jack had no qualms manhandling you, roughly grabbing you by the hips and pulling you back and forth onto his cock, practically using you as a fleshlight – in the heat of the moment, all reservations were gone, and Jack couldn’t do anything but act out on pure instinct.

Fast, deep, making sure to bottom out with every single thrust, Jack was hitting all of your most sensitive spots; all you could do was stay there and take it.

“F-Fuck… that’s good,” Jack groaned. “You take me so well, babe.”

His hands momentarily abandoned their spot on your hips to pull his shirt over his head, discarding it to the floor.

Incoherently moaning his name, praising the size of his cock, how good he made you feel – that’s all you could do, and oh did Jack revel in the praise. You could practically feel his cock jump inside of you with every moan that slipped past your lips.

“J-Jack…! H-Harder, please!” You begged, wanting him to fully let go and give in to instincts.

“E-Eh…?” Jack said, pace momentarily slowing. “Are you sure you know what you’re asking?”

“Mhm… please,” you said, glancing at him from over your shoulder with watery, widened eyes that screamed desperation.

“… you asked for it. Ain’t no going back after that,” Jack said.

Your breath momentarily hitched before a loud, lewd and prolonged moan escaped you as Jack slid his cock out, only leaving the tip in, before pounding back in with breathtaking force – over and over again, his pace only increasing with every thrust.

Oh, Jack was growling, revelling in the rough, primal fucking. Instincts fully taking over, he lowered himself, warm and sweaty chest pressing against your backside, mounting you.

The only thing keeping you from collapsing from the rough treatment on your body was Jack’s arm, which was wrapped around your abdomen, keeping you upright. His free hand slid up to your throat, gripping it right under your chin to tilt your head up, and with your ear now right next to his mouth, you could hear every deep grunt and feel every puff of his warm breath.

He was all around you, his larger frame easily overpowering yours as he pressed himself against you. Your senses were filled with him – overwhelmingly so – going straight between your legs as the thread that had been steadily building in your core threatened to snap.

And slowly but surely, you began feeling Jack’s knot swelling, growing bigger and further stretching your fucked-out pussy.

“G-Gonna come soon,” Jack grunted, nipping at your ear. “Gonna fill you up, mark you as mine.”

Although holding on by a thin thread of sanity, Jack refused to come before you did, and so letting go of your throat, he reached between your legs to stroke steady circles around your clit.

Planting your face into the sheets below you, effectively muffling your loud screams of ecstasy, the extra stimulation to your sensitive clit pushed you over the edge. Clamping down hard on Jack’s cock as you came, Jack muttered incoherent curses at the sudden tightness.

With a few final, powerful thrusts, the tip of his cock hit your cervix, his knot swelling to its full size as he emptied his load right at the entrance of your womb, growling loudly and throwing his head back.

Panting, sweaty and completely spent, the two of you remained connected. Glancing over your shoulder, you sent Jack a cute smile, paired with your droopy and tired eyes, effectively flustering the wolf man. His ears flattened as a hue of pink decorated his cheeks, looking at you like a deer caught in headlight before looking away bashfully.

Adorable, truly. As if he hadn’t just rearranged your insides.

Still, Jack had some bite left in him as he gripped your body, shifting both of your positions so that you were both lying on your sides, Jack spooning you with his cock still firmly nested inside your warmth.

“… my uh… knot should go down in about thirty minutes. We’ll be stuck together until then…” he says in a gruff but somewhat shy tone.

A half-truth, really. While his swollen knot would normally keep him locked with his mate, you weren’t a wolf beastwoman, and so your walls didn’t clamp down hard enough to remain locked with him.

Really, Jack just wanted a few more minutes of intimacy with you but was too shy to admit to it outright.

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #jack howl #jack howl x reader #twisted wonderland jack howl #twst #twst x reader #twst jack howl #disney’s twisted wonderland #disney twst #kinktober 2023 #savanaclaw #vision of temptations 2023 #nsft #minors dni

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tumbleweed-run · 6 months

Text

In the Light of Day

Kinktober 2023 Day 31 Free for all

“Are you sure this is how you want to fully test this?” Tav sounds as nervous as Astarion feels.

Astarion does a much better job of hiding his nerves, though. He looks down at the gold band on his finger, glinting in the light as he flexes his hand. “It’s not like we don’t know it works,” he reasons.

“Yes, but that was through the windows. Maybe it doesn’t work as well in direct sunlight,” Tav looks nearly panicked.

Astarion can’t have them both stressed, so he steps into her space and grabs her arms. “Pet,” he says sharply, and her mouth slams shut, “we know it works.”

They do. He’s spent the better part of the last three days standing in front of uncovered windows in the tower, unsinged. He just hadn’t been bold enough to step outside just yet. The memory of that day on the docks in Baldur’s Gate lingers like a bad taste in the back of his mouth. Every time he’d considered even stepping out onto the terrace Gale loves so much he would feel dizzy. But he can’t bear keeping himself locked up any longer. Astarion decided today would be the day he was going out.

His hand hesitates on the door despite all his reassurances to Tav.

Just because Astarion believes the ring and its protection works doesn’t mean he didn’t take precautions. His face is truly the only part of his skin exposed. Should something go wrong, it would be easy enough to flip up his hood for protection until he was safely back inside. When he finally brings himself to push open the door and walk out into the street, he’s easily the most overdressed person out there.

His eyes slide shut as the full force of the sun beats down on him, and he waits. Nothing happens. Tav breathes a sigh of relief next to him.

“See,” Astarion turns his head towards her, eyes opening, “it works fine out here, too.”

Tav nods, a small smile finally breaking out across her lips. “Thank the gods,” she breathes.

“Let’s keep that sentiment to ourselves,” he says with a wry smile, “lest our wizard get any more ideas.”

She laughs and grabs his hand, “we should get going if we’re going to find him by noon.”

Gale had disappeared not long after sunrise. He’d left them a map to somewhere outside of the city and told them to be at that spot by noon. Astarion wondered if the air of intrigue was to act as a further lure to get him out of the tower for the first time. He wasn’t about to tell the other man that it worked.

As they traveled towards their secret destination, it was clear that this was turning out to be the first summerlike day they’d experienced since winter had slunk off. Astarion was a fan of the heat, his body rarely feeling this kind of warmth, but even he’d taken the cloak off by the time they’d reached the city gate. There were beads of sweat along the back of Tav’s neck that Astarion spent most of their journey distracted by.

It wasn’t hard to follow Gale’s directions, which led them to a small clearing in a wood not too far south of the city. The wizard was sitting, leaning up against the trunk of a tree with a book in hand as they approached.

“I was beginning to wonder if I’d be eating alone,” Gale announced when they got to the edge of the clearing.

“Please,” Astarion sniffed, “we’re not even late.”

Gale stood and approached them. If Astarion had need for breath, his would have caught when the damn wizard stepped out of the shade. He’d forgotten how the man looked in the sun, and this was even worse. Perhaps without the orb eating him alive, the man appeared even more golden than he had while they traveled. Gale looked radiant with the sun, its rays highlighting both the silver and honey-gold strands of his hair. He would have made a glorious god if their paths had turned that way. Not that Astarion would ever reveal that thought to anyone.

“I’m starved,” Tav announces, pulling Astarion from his thoughts.

Gale grins, “well then, you are quite lucky to know a wizard both talented with magic and food. It’s all being kept fresh with ice.”

They sat on a blanket in the sun, eating far too much food. Gale had been prepared for an army, it seemed. There was even a bottle filled with blood for Astarion, but he took small bites of everything. It was something he often did to feel included in mealtimes. At home, he’d sit with his goblet of blood, the origins of which he’d never gotten around to asking about, and taste a little of everything Gale and Tav ate. The food would never satiate his hunger. Sometimes, it seemed to make it worse, but he’d found he enjoyed eating in the company of others.

Once he’d grown bored of food, long before the other two did, Astarion laid back on the blanket, basking in the sun. It felt different from when he’d had the tadpole. He saw the sun's lights and was able to revel in its warmth, but something was missing. Likely whatever it was that the ring was protecting him from, an invisible shield along his skin. He could live with that, a tiny missing piece, in return for the joys of being a daywalker once more.

“You are a filthy romantic,” he announces suddenly, turning to level his gaze at Gale.

Gale pauses midchew of something with an eyebrow raised.

“A picnic in the woods,” Astarion clarifies, earning him an eye roll from the wizard.

Tav leans over him, blocking the sun from his face. “You’re enjoying it, though.”

Astarion doesn’t answer except to pull her down to him. She ends up lying across his chest, and he feels her stiffen for a moment. He knows why, they all do, but he won't allow it to ruin their day. So instead, he turns to his side so Tav’s lying next to him pulled tight against his body. She smells like the sun and her hair is warm to the touch. He buries his face in her neck and inhales.

She laughs, “I thought you were full.”

“I have no plans to eat you,” Astarion assures her even as he lets his fangs scrape across her skin, no doubt also tangling in her hair.

Tav shivers.

“Unless you wish me to,” he adds, hooking one leg over the top of hers and pulling her even closer. Tav squirms a little, no doubt feeling the stirring of his cock against her thighs.

Behind her, Gale clears his throat.

“I think the wizard is jealous,” Astarion says loud enough for the other man to hear.

“I think,” Gale says with a touch of indignity, “that the wizard wants to remind you he is also here.”

Tav giggles but pushes against him to roll away. Astarion lets her. He watches as she crawls over to Gale, sitting in his lap before pressing a kiss against the wizard’s lips. Gale pulls her closer until she’s straddling his waist, deepening the kiss. He reaches down to grasp his cock through his pants as Tav starts rocking against Gale.

Astarion lazily palms himself as he half watches them. His eyes slip shut after a moment, and he turns his head back to the sun, enjoying the way the rays beat white against his eyelids. He groans as he hears sweet little sounds escaping Tav’s lips, still muffled against Gale’s. He’s torn between wanting to join them and laying like this in the sun.

It’s a soft, slick sound that makes up his mind for him. Turning again, he sees that Gale has worked Tav’s pants down under her ass, and his hand has disappeared between them. Astarion watches the pale swell of flesh roll, no doubt in response to fingers buried within her, and is overwhelmed with the desire to bite her there, hard enough she’ll scar. While it’s unlikely Tav will tell him no, he swallows that down for another moment. Right now, he’s going to commit the way they look in the sunlight to memory. He hopes to see them like this a million more times, but he needs to remember today.

“Astarion,” Tav calls to him, voice inching near a whine.

He grins, rises up onto his knees, and moves to her. Once his front is flush against her back, Astarion trails a kiss against her neck. “Is the wizard not enough for you, darling,” he teases.

Tav cries out. No doubt Gale has retaliated with his fingers to the barb. Astarion grins.

“You’re insufferable,” Gale tells him almost casually despite what he continues to do to Tav.

Astarion grins at the man over Tav’s shoulder. “But you love me that way,” it’s half a statement, half a challenge.

Gale sighs. “Of course I do,” he sounds resigned to the fact.

There’s a swell of giddiness in Astarion’s chest at the wizard’s affirmation. It seems to grow larger in the light until he can no longer repress the certainly appalling grin that’s broken across his face. Gale returns the look with a stupidly brilliant smile, one so bright that Astarion reburries his face into Tav’s neck.

He reaches around the front of Tav until his hand finds where Gale’s fingers are slowly moving in and out of her cunt. Astarion rubs gently against her clit until she’s whimpering, hips chasing after both of their touches in stuttered movements.

“You make such pretty sounds,” he purrs against Tav’s skin. He feels, rather than sees, her skin grow hotter with a flush.

Astarion allows his fingers to drop lower, and slowly he presses one into her, sliding it between the two fingers Gale is using. He allows the wizard to control the way they move, his position too awkward to take control. Tav moans and her thighs spread almost impossibly wider in an effort to accommodate the three fingers now inside of her. Astarion can feel her cunt growing wetter with each second. No longer is it just his fingers coated but a good part of his hand as well.

When he pulls his hand away from her, Tav whimpers but it’s quickly swallowed by a moan. Astarion had little doubt the wizard has replaced his finger with another of his own. Astarion holds out his hand to Gale, who leans forward just enough so he can like a stripe up his palm. He grinds his cock against Tav’s ass as Gale eagerly cleans her from Astarion’s hand. Before he finishes, Gale presses a soft kiss against the golden band.

He grips onto Tav’s hips and lifts her slightly, away from Gale’s fingers. “Let’s take these off,” he says as an explanation. Gale is the one who ends up pulling them down completely. Tav just barely helps by moving her legs. Astarion scrapes his teeth against her neck in retribution before moving back off of Gale, standing.

Gale quickly flips them so that Tav is pinned beneath him on the blanket, her head resting just before Astarion’s feet. She grins up at him and asks, “Are you fucking me?”

Astarion shakes his head, “I thought we were rewarding the wizard’s brilliance? Let’s let him have you today.”

Gale doesn’t need to be told anything further and makes short work of his own pants before dropping down to hover back over Tav. Astarion circles around behind them but stays standing until Gale’s pressing into Tav. Her eyes roll back and then close, which is when Astarion finally drops to his knees.

He holds only Gale’s hips as the man begins lazily thrusting into Tav. After a moment, he moves his hold until he gripping the wizard’s ass, pulling him apart lightly. Gale’s rhythm suffers just a little when Astarion does this. He grins to himself about this. Then, without so much as a whisper of warning, Astarion leans down and presses his tongue against the ring of muscle.

“Ah,” Gale yelps in surprise. He would have collapsed forward if it weren't for Astarion holding him in place.

“No?” He asks, allowing the breath of his words to ghost across the flesh.

“Just surprised,” Gale clarifies with barely enough time before Astarion returns to what he’d been doing.

The wizard tries valiantly to keep thrusting into Tav, but around the time Astarion presses his tongue just inside, he all but freezes. Astarion allows himself to be sloppy as he fucks Gale with his tongue, the wizard doesn’t seem to mind judging from his moans and the way his hips try and push back against him. Astarion keeps him held in place.

“Astarion, if I can’t watch, could I at least get fucked?” Tav asks in a voice Astarion knows is accompanied by a pout.

“Fine,” Astarion relents and sits up. He quickly undoes the ties of his own pants and shoves them down just below his cock.

“Are you coherent enough?” He teases, leaning forward so his hand is probably within Gale’s eyesight.

The words are muttered spitefully, and the oil appears, even if it’s a little more than usual. Astarion quickly slicks it against his cock before swiping the excess down the cleft of Gale’s ass. He presses in with little warning, moving slow, yet relentlessly until he bottoms out. It takes a few shallow thrusts into the wizard before he begins moving again. Tav sighs happily on the ground, one leg raising up until Astarion takes hold of it, allowing Gale to thrust into her deeper.

It’s not quick or frenzied as they fuck. Gale’s hips are rolling languidly, forward into Tav and then back against Astarion. The only noises for a while are each of their pants and the sound of the trees rustling overhead with a breeze that doesn’t reach them. Astarion allows his eyes to slide shut, again tilting his head towards the sun. It feels like his whole body is glowing in the light, the warmth growing low in his belly, each thrust of his hips making him grow brighter. This is something he’s never experienced and something he swears he will a hundred times more.

Astarion’s orgasm takes him by surprise. His body folds over Gale as he comes, hips pinning the other man motionless again. Gale doesn’t complain, only grinds back against Astarion. Astarion pulls out of the wizard but keeps his face buried against his back. It’s not terribly comfortable as Gale begins to move, his own hand holding up Tav’s leg now, but Astarion remains anyway. He reaches around and lazily swipes his thumb against Tav’s clit until she cries out, thighs clamping tightly against Gale. The wizard comes not long after. Astarion feels the other man’s release roll through the muscles of his back.

“You seem happy,” Tav says tentatively a few moments later as they’re lying side by side on the picnic blanket.

Astarion opens his eyes and looks over at her, and then at Gale, who’s resting his head on her stomach.

“I am,” he says truthfully.

#bloodweave x tav #bloodweave #Gale x tav #Astarion x tav #kinktober 2023 #Happy Halloween everyone #and a happy last day of kinktober as well!

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callsignmarz · 2 months

Text

MDNI | 18+ | König x Reader

TW: mentions of alcohol, mild language, misplaced anger, mature scene.

“He makes you jealous.”

König knew the type of woman he married.

Especially, after a heated argument.

There at the end of the bar, you downed the last few sips of your second cosmo, reminiscing on the stupid fight you just had outside, moments ago.

“Want another?” The bartender customarily asked as he draped a hand rag over his shoulder.

You had a good buzz going.

Although, you didn’t need to go over your limit. The sober mask comes on as you pushed the empty glass away with your fingertips.

“No, I’m okay. But, just incase I change my mind; Keep my tab open.”

“What about your big fella and his friend?”

Your eyes thinned at the bartenders question with confusion quickly morphing into raw ire as you swiveled around to see König sitting at a booth with an arm purposely wrapped around some red headed bimbo.

Let the games begin, motherfucker.

In a matter of seconds, you pounced from the bar stool and like a black panther in the shadows, you blended in with the sea of bodies, stalking and observing their interactions from afar.

As a former mercenary yourself, patience became your most reliable source.

Feeling a familiar pair of eyes burning a hole into him, König swiftly turned his attention to the crowded bar, leisurely scouting until his gaze met yours.

His lips curl into a cocky smirk as he pulls the woman closer to him, triggering you to fly into a jealous rage.

Maneuvering through the horde of drunks, you wantonly drag over a nearby chair once you finally approached the two, persistently planting yourself uncomfortably close to the woman.

“Neue Freunde finden, mein Liebe? (Making new friends, my love?)” You asked König while your eyes fixate on the red haired woman, maintaining a toothy grin.

“Ja, das glaube ich. (Yeah, I guess I am.)”

The red head’s brows crease together, feeling quite uneasy.

“I’m sorry, König. Do you know her?” She questions as she leans closer into König, hoping he would shield her from your piercing watch and you fight the maniacal urges that arise.

By the befuddling look on the poor girl’s face and her accent was a dead give away…she was an American.

Regardless. She had no place flirting with König and the thought of her sharing the same oxygen as him, slowly boiled your blood to a dangerous temperature.

“Ich schwöre bei Gott, wenn du ihn berührst...(I swear to God, if you touch him)” Your tone daintly dips to a menacing level, one that König immediately recognizes.

The smug expression on König’s face becomes one of wary. “My apologies, Schatz. This here is my lovely wife, Y/N. She thinks you’re very pretty.” He blatantly lies through his teeth.

“Y-Your wife?”

The woman blinks a few times, bewildered by how she missed all the crucial signs.

Her eyes drop to your left hand, where a diamond ring would be, but instead there was a small calligraphy tattoo, engraved in your skin that read:

“Til Death.”

“Hat deine Hure einen Namen, König? (Does your whore have a name?)”

He didn’t answer right away.

Instead König reached over to grab the glass of bourbon that sat on the table, taking a quick swig of it while watching the tension build as you continued to inspect his new “friend.”

Your eyes flit over to him with impending glare, which light a fire under his ass to give an answer.

“Victoria.” He said dully, avoiding all eye contact.

A seed of suspicion was ready to plant itself as König had a small habit of fabricating to avoid conflict. But, the way her neck almost snapped at the name, convinced you otherwise and your expression softens.

“gefällt sie dir?” (Do you like her?)

“Y/N, es ist nicht-” (Y/N, it’s not-)

Swiftly rising to your feet and cutting off his excuse, you walk your way around the table to settle comfortably in your husband’s lap, wedging yourself between the two with your eyes studiously on Victoria.

Despite your calm and relaxed nature, the air surrounding held underlying tension with a dicey edge to it.

Victoria’s eyes shift frantically between you and König, hoping that she can escape the situation without any causing any more problems.

“I’m sorry, but I didn’t know you were married. I just assumed you were single.”

“Du hast falsch gedacht, Schlampe. Ich wette, die dumme Schlampe erkennt nicht einmal, was für eine Frau ich bin.(You thought wrong, bitch. I bet that stupid bitch doesn’t even realize what kind of woman I am.)” You added with a humorless laugh, confusing Victoria even more.

“What did she say?”

“Don’t look at my husband, look at me.”

In response to your command, König’s arm causally wraps itself around your waist, not to be endearing but to restrain you if things go suddenly left.

“Are you having fun with König, Victoria?”

Victoria shivers at the piercing tone of your question.

“No, of course not.”

“No? So are you telling me that he wasn’t good enough to entertain you?” You scoffed in disbelief and instinctively König’s grip tightens around your waist, fully aware of the game your about to play.

#call of duty #cod mw2 #call of duty fanfic #mw2 imagine #spotify #konig x y/n #konig modern warfare #konig x you #konig call of duty #konig mw2 #konig cod #konig x reader #jealousy #fanfic #wattpad #ao3 fanfic #ao3 writer

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kazupea · 9 months

Text

༺ Dozing Desire ༻

Pairing : Kazuha, Beidou, Heizou, Thoma (in order)

Authors note : I have procrastinated this for far to long, so I finally finished this. It was supposed to be released a while ago😅Also there is no use of Y/N in my writing ever :)

Warnings : Seasickness/v0mit in Beidou’s, injuries in Thoma’s (no gore), mentions of bl00d in Thoma’s

Here is my masterlist!

Enjoy !

K. Kazuha 🍁

A soft hand ran slowly up and down your back, KAZUHA was leaned on the trunk of a tree while your head rested upon his shoulder.

Kazuha’s other hand was used to write Haikus down on a sheet of paper, reading them to you as he went along. His head rested on top of yours and you could feel the vibration of his voice as he spoke.

Your eyes soon grew heavy, but desperate to stay open. Kazuha noticed the slowing of your breath and looked down at you. He slightly chuckles at the sight, careful not to disturb you.

“Dove, rest. For your eyes seek to shut, but continue to be forced awake.” Kazuha whispered. He quietly set down his pen and began to softly play with your slightly tousled hair.

“Kazu…” you whine, sitting up and rubbing your eyes, still a bit heavy with sleep. “I’m not tired.” You stifled a yawn while shaking your head.

Your head rested on Kazuha’s shoulder once more, he smiled softly and continued his haiku. Only when he felt your head sliding off of his shoulder did he stop writing.

Kazuha caught your forehead in his palm, chuckling again. With his free hand, he moved the haiku out of his lap and ont the grass beside him. He then laid your head on his lap and brushed his hands through your hair.

“And you said you weren’t tired. Sleep well, dove.” Kazuha yawned, closing his eyes along with you to join you in dreamland.

Beidou 🍻

You leaned over the edge of the crux, releasing the breakfast you had earlier this morning. You slumped against one of the ships walls, wrapping an arm around your stomach.

You grabbed your water pouch with shaky hands and washed the awful taste out of your mouth, spitting it out over the edge of the ship. With closed eyes, you laid on the floor.

You heard footsteps coming towards you, but you didn’t dare open your eyes to worsen the dizziness. But then, you heard a familiar voice that finally made you force your eyes open.

“Hey, sweets. You doin’ okay?” BEIDOU said, squatting near your frail body and running a hand over your forehead. Your eyes met hers and she smiled at you.

“Beidou.. I don’t feel good..” You softly cried, moving to hug Beidou. She rested her hand on your back and rubbed up and down.

“Ah, I know baby. Here, let’s get you to one of our rooms, okay?” She whispered, picking you up bridal style and kissing your head.

She walked both you and her to one of the free rooms on the ship with soft steps, desperately trying not to make you anymore nauseous than you already are.

Beidou carefully laid you down on the bed and sat beside you. She slowly ran her fingers over your forehead in an attempt to calm you enough to sleep.

“Thank you, Bei..” You almost incoherently mumbled, and then you dozed off peacefully. Beidou continued to rub your forehead.

“Your welcome, sweets.” Beidou whispered, slowly getting up and walking out of the room after turning off the lights.

S. Heizou 🔎

You and HEIZOU had been up all night working on a case. A very hard one at that, and neither of you got much sleep at all.

Heizou had taken a nap earlier, which was very rare for him, but he simply said he needed to ‘freshen up’ before continuing his he case.

And you? You worked on the case while he was napping. As his detective accomplice, or as Heizou likes to say, ‘partner in crime’, he trusts you to deal with the cases when he cannot, and vice versa.

Unlike Heizou, you haven’t napped or taken a break at all, and you were utterly exhausted. Meanwhile, Heizou was living it up in his dreams and was completely oblivious of your situation.

Well, not completely. Before his nap he noticed that you look about as tired and droopy as he did, Heizou had also told you to nap so you didn’t over exert yourself.

You didn’t listen. You wanted the best for Heizou, since he was always so exhausted you wanted this case to be as easy as possible. But, there weren’t really any benefits for you.

Heizou had awoken from his nap and went straight to his office to check up on you, only to see your head bobbing up and down and eyes hardly open.

“Ah, partner. I see I might have accidentally worked you to the brim… don’t worry. Come here.” Heizou whispered, reaching his hands out to you like he was about to pick up a child.

“Hrnggg.. s’fine… zou…” you muttered, attempting to slap his hands away, but failing miserably. Heizou picked you up and held you like a child.

“It is not fine, my dearest. You are practically asleep right now. If you are so awake, let me ask you a question. What was the main course of action that…….” His voice faded as your consciousness faded with it.

Heizou noticed this after the question and chuckled to himself. He sat down on the bed and laid you on top of him, and he kissed your forehead while stroking your hair.

You were drooling on his collar, but as long as you slept sufficiently he didn’t mind.

Thoma 🔥

You stumbled into Komore Teahouse, seeking out your beloved, THOMA. To no surprise, he was there. Thoma was feeding Taroumaru when you walked in.

“Ah! There you are- woah! What happened?” Thoma exclaimed anxiously while trotting over to you, who was currently trying to balance on the wall.

“Uh, it’s really nothing- ah shit!..” you hissed in pain as you toppled to your knees, arm still clutching the wound on your stomach.

“Here, I have bandages in my bag I think! Let me take you to a room.” Thoma hooks and arm under your legs and another under your back to support you.

You sit on the floor, still moaning and groaning in pain. Thoma rushes back over with the gauze and bandages, kneeling down in front of you.

“I have to clean the wound first to prevent it from getting infected, it will definitely hurt. But, ah.. oh! Here, squeeze my free hand!” He offers his hand out to you, and you gladly take it.

Right as the disinfectant wipe touches the gash on your stomach, tears well up in your tightly shut eyes and your mouth contorts into a grimace.

“Shh, I know it hurts. Remember, squeeze my hand.” Thoma reassures. You do as he said and squeeze his hand as hard as you can at the moment. It didn’t really help, but you couldn’t tell him that.

Once Thoma finished your bandages, he pulled you into a tight hug. Just then you noticed how unbearably exhausted you were, the overbearing pain, the hours of training and fighting you had done today, they were both taking a toll on you.

A yawn escaped your lips before you nuzzled your head into Thomas neck. He raised his hand to touch the back of your head as he rocked slowly side to side.

“Sweetums, you can’t keep doing this. Okay? It makes me worried every time you come home bleeding all over the place. It also worries me that the blood will stain your clothes…” Thoma mumbles.

“M’ sorry, Thoma..” you whispered sleepily as you stifled another yawn. Thoma kissed the crown of your head before chuckling at your dreary reply.

“It’s okay, just promise me that you’ll try to be more careful, okay?” He knew couldn’t hear him, you had already fallen asleep. The soft snores coming from your form gave it away.

As long as you were safe now, that was all that mattered in the present moment.

8/14/23

#kazuha x reader #thoma x reader #beidou x reader #heizou x reader #genshin x reader #tw blood #tw v0mit #thoma #kazuha #beidou #heizou #genshin headcanons #genshin x you #genshin fluff #comfort

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thedrunkenreadersreviews · 2 months

Text

Who is Alastor leashed to?

Coke and Jack always slaps! (Sip, sp)

With time to digest Hazbin Hotel's first season, as well as explore other theories that people have, I find that a theory I have is one of the rarest ones. That in no way means it is superior (I'll probably end up being wrong tbh) but I wanted your takes and to read what you guys have to say. Of course, this theory is in regards to who I believe Alastor is leashed to. Granted, my theory is not completely formulated. There are still questions I am asking myself and I am still pulling the whole thing together but I want to share the base of what I have because maybe collaborations and conversations can help me answer these questions.

*Sip, sip*

To start, I think everything is connected to each other. Alastor's leash, his disappearance for 7 years, Lilith, his being at the hotel, and the source of his power.

Now, as much as I posted jokes about Lilith and Alastor on here, let me be clear that I do NOT believe that Lilith owns Alastor's soul. I think it is way too obvious and has been written as a red herring. However, that does not mean I do not think Lilith is in no way involved in the Alastor equation. I think she is but not as the one that Alastor is leashed to. How exactly she fits into this, that I am still trying to figure out.

*Sip, sip*

Who, then, do I think owns Alastor? No, I don't think it's Eve either (though I do not in any way completely dismiss that theory. That was actually the first one I contemplated because she has been MIA). I don't think it's Roo (but the same thing with the Eve theory, I am happy to entertain it because I think it is plausible). I am just on the brink of being 100% convinced it is most certainly not Lilith, not Lucifer, and no, not Niffty either.

*Sip, sip*

Mostly, I think Alastor is leashed to von Eldritch and it actually surprises me that I have not seen more people think so.

*Sip, sip*

Von Eldritch has been one of those looming background figures that is there just enough to make his existence canon but not enough for fans who have not been following Hazbin's creation since the beginning to know who they are. And that is in no way me attempting to gatekeep Hazbin Hotel. I love when fandoms grow and I think it is absolutely incredible that this fantastic show is expanding to a wider audience and more people get to share in this remarkable adventure. Fredrick von Eldritch and Berthseda von Eldritch, along with their children, are shadows on the wall. They are seen in portraits on the hotel's walls and Fredrick is seen in a picture with an arguably much younger-looking Lucifer in Lucifer's room. They have not made an official debut, but they are there. Now let me break down why I think Alastor is leashed to von Eldritch (and I'm leaning towards him being leashed to Fredrick but I'm not dismissing any of the other von Eldritchs).

*Sip, sip*

Eldritch Lore is already canon in the Hellaverse

Not only is Eldritch lore (H.P. Lovecraft's grand mythos) wiggling its way onto the screen in Hazbin but it is most prominently present in Helluva Boss.

In the Helluva Boss episode "Seeing Stars," the entire prologue is Stolas explaining Eldritch lore. Azathoth is a god in the Eldritch Mythos known as one of the "Great Old Ones."

In the prologue of the same episode, Stolas says: "In the great expanse of the nether, there exist boundless amounts of magnificent phenomena. ... But once every one thousand years, our corner of reality is treated to an incredible sight. From the deep eldritch recesses of the cosmos, the tears of a forgotten colossus begin to fall. Tears made of the hopes and dreams of every living thing that never came to be condensed and sent shooting across the night sky in a dazzling final display. What appears to mortal beings as a meteor shower, we can see for what it is---Azathoth's Tears." This prologue nearly solidifies the existence of another reality, one not ruled by the angels of the Hellaverse's Heaven, beyond the reaches of Lucifer and Sera and the others. In this other reality, the Eldritch begins may be the ones running the show and sometimes, as Stolas implies, the two realities cross paths, almost like incursions if you will. I'll dwell more on this in a bit.

In "Spring Broken," one of the shops is also named "Dagon Juice," with Dagon being another figure from the Eldritch Mythos.

2. Alastor's Powers

It has been confirmed by Viv and other creators on the show that Alastor possesses not just voodoo powers but also "Eldritch Powers." The green motif that surrounds Alastor's powers can be found in Eldritch lore, as are the black tentacles that Alastor frequently calls on.

3. The von Eldritch Family

They are a complicated group because of the information that we have on them but even more so because of the information that we don't. From what we can see in the portraits both in the pilot and in the episode "Dad Beat Dad," the Morningstar Family and von Eldritch Family are rather close.

*Sip, sip*

Let's acknowledge now that their name is literally von Eldritch.

*Sip, sip*

With that out of the way, let's look first at the picture of Lucifer and Fredrick in "Dad Beat Dad." Lucifer is not wearing the same outfit he wears in the series and other official artworks. He looks relatively younger and is casually smiling with his arm around Fredrick while pointing to him in a goofy manner. Just two friends hanging out. Strangely, Lucifer seems to be wearing an outfit similar to Charlie's tux in the image (but that's a theory for another day).

In the Pilot, images of the von Eldritch and Morningstar Families are found in the background. One portrait depicts both families together (with Lilith looking a little less than thrilled to be there) and one shows Seviathan with Charlie at their high school prom (for those that don't know, Seviathan von Eldritch, Fredrick's son, used to date Charlie and they were in a series relationship before eventually splitting up). There are no other pictures of the Morningstar family being close with any of the other families. We do see Lucifer in the background during the end of the extermination with Zestial, Carmilla, and Zeezi, but that's all, and this shows that the royal family does sometimes engage with the overlords.

Furthermore, Fredrick has been said to be an Overlord of Hell, and the von Eldritch Family are, as of now, regarded as Hellborne with the only other notable Hellbrone entity mentioned that is not of lower station (Ars Goetia, imp, hellhound) is Charlie.

*Sip, sip*

So, if you are not Ars Goetia but Hellborne and so high up in society that you are friendly with the Morningstar Family, it raises questions. This is what I think. I think Seviathan and his sister are Hellborne, while Fredrick and Berthseda are not. I think they came from this Eldritch space, before or after Lucifer's fall, and either ended up getting stuck there because their window to return closed, were cast out (much like Lucifer was and that is how they became friends), or decided to remain in the Hellaverse reality.

Fredrick is known as an Overlord because an Overlord requires you to own souls and is the highest you can get unless you are Ars Goetia. So I think Fredrick is an Overlord by de facto much like Alastor is (Alastor does not want power as stated by Fautisse and was never even looking for the title of Overlord but has it by default. Also interesting how Alastor is an Overlord with no apparent territory like the Vees and Rosie have, which makes me believe that this position on Alastor's lack of desire for power and being an Overlord still stands, and I'll expand more on that as well ... in another post, this theory is long, I know).

*Sip, sip*

This is where my uncertainty that I'm still trying to figure out starts.

I think it's possible von Eldritch is not on the side of Lucifer. It could be that he is simply trying to return home or desires to take over not just Hell but Heaven as well.

If Alastor is leashed to von Eldritch, I could see von Eldritch sending him to the hotel as an informant of sorts which ties back to Lilith. I think Lilith could know about von Eldritch's hold on Alastor and also knows about Charlie's plans for the hotel. So I think it is very possible that Alastor double dipped: he sold his soul to von Eldritch (why, again, another theory, can't make this post too long lol) and then made a deal with Lilith: I'll do what I can to help Charlie and in exchange, you try to get me out of my deal with von Eldritch (notice how in the Pilot, Alastor was particularly interested in Lilith when admiring that family portrait which is why I think she is still part of this equation). Lilith, based on her expression in that two families photo as seen in the Pilot as well, does not seem to like von Eldritch like Lucifer does (of course this could be because she disliked the relationship between their son and Charlie, but we can't place the portrait on the timeline).

*Sip, sip*

So, I'll leave it at that for now. I'm picking up little details as I go, trying to catch things. I think the owner of Alastor's contract is von Eldritch, I think Lilith is involved with Alastor's being at the hotel, and I think this can also play into why Alastor seethingly hates Lucifer from moment one (along with another reason I'm happy to divulge in ... in another post lol).

*Sip, sip*

But please, tell me your thoughts, and feel free to ask questions. Let me know if you want to hear my take on the whole Alastor/Lucifer rivalry, what Alastor is after if not power, why he made a deal with von Eldritch (which I think he made when he was still alive and not just before his 7-year absence) or anything else, really. I love talking about theories.

*Sip, sip*

Also, don't you think it is a bit funny how the number 7 is associated with Heaven like the number 6 is associated with Hell, and Lilith ends up apparently being in Heaven for 7 years?

But I digress.

Cheers.

*Sip, sip*

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel spoilers #alastor #hazbin hotel lilith #hazbin hotel theory #helluva boss #helluva stolas #hazbin hotel season 2 #vivziepop #hazbin hotel alastor

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jeniffercheck · 4 months

Text

hairline fracture (is it me that you'd run after?)

shivlina oneshot: argestes, but have roman and shiv switch places -- set during 2x06 (argestes), shivlina are established affair partners, closely follows the canon of s2. CWs below the cut.

words: 9k

for @shivvroys as part of the shivcord winter fic exchange xx

read here or on ao3

cw for domestic violence & implied/referenced domestic violence. It is a prevalent theme throughout the entire fic & injuries are described quite a few times but it does not get graphic. the shown domestic violence does not stray from canon. please let me know if you think i've missed anything!

Karolina grips her glass loosely, a lousy mix of the worst 2000s house beats and party guests shouting over the music reverberating through her ears. Shiv stares at Tom across the room, her eyes turning into something more of a scowl compared to Karolina’s entertainment.

“You’d think he’d have a little more tact than trying to get with a competitor,” Shiv says.

Shiv is obviously using a loose definition of the word competitor, the woman being some executive from a privately owned firm that Karolina can’t recall ever being involved in news or theme parks, but she laughs quietly at the comment, unable to ignore the irony in the complaint.

“The fact that he’d even consider speaking to another woman in public in a way that could even hint at a business deal—” Karolina says. “It’s horrifying.”

“Whatever,” Shiv says, taking a sip of her drink. “We’re different.”

“Because…” Karolina lets the word hang in a question, not one that she really needs an answer to, but one she’d like to indulge in anyway.

“Because, I don’t trust them,” Shiv says, finally tearing her eyes away from Tom. It’s the unsaid that Karolina revels in when she pokes and prods, this time around being that Shiv trusts her.

“Although—” Shiv starts.

“Here we go,” Karolina sighs, bracing her arms on the table for impact.

“At least Tom has the decency to laugh at everything she says,” Shiv looks over at the pair again, and Karolina follows her gaze, an animated Tom laughing obnoxiously at whatever the woman has just told him.

Karolina leans closer to Shiv and whispers delicately in her ear, “Maybe she’s just funnier than you.”

She bites back a smirk as Shiv looks at her again, eyes sharp and eyebrow quirked.

“You think I’m jealous,” she states.

Karolina shrugs. “Are you?”

“No,” Shiv says immediately. She rests an elbow on the table and leans her head into her hand, an insufferable smugness taking over her features. “There are more pressing matters in front of me.”

Karolina lets her hair fall in front of her face, if only to hide the growing redness from the eyes of the surrounding crowd. If anyone were to ask, she’d say it was the alcohol. If anyone were to know, well, they’d know that Shiv Roy has Karolina Novotney wrapped around her fucking finger; annoying conversations about her husband be damned.

“Glad you came?” Shiv asks.

While glad is certainly not the word that Karolina would use for her last-minute attendance at the Billionaire Boys Club annual reunion—waking up to the news that her employer has hundreds of accounts of heinous crimes and illegal cover-ups headed right to the press is really not her preferred way to start the work week—it’s always nice to spend time with Shiv in a place that doesn’t feel so shrouded in secrecy. Still, there’s work to do, whether she wants to have that conversation or not.

“I’ll be glad if we can make it through this panel in one piece,” she admits.

“Well,” Shiv says, suddenly agitated. “Take that up with Kendall and Roman.”

“I’ll be taking it up with all three of you tomorrow,” Karolina says. “I need you all on your best behavior.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Shiv says. “Regret, responsibility, and remedy. Condemn and move on. Are we missing anything? Maybe, daughter and doormat?”

Karolina frowns. She’d assumed Shiv’s being here was something she wanted—a strategy to stay in the game, not another instance of being walked over. Karolina lowers her voice, suddenly conscious of their position in the room, a pit of wandering eyes and ears.

“Shiv, I won’t let them make you the face for this, you know that, right?” she asks. “If it all goes crashing down—”

“You wouldn’t,” Shiv says, her expression softening. “But I can think of about ten other faces who would.”

“Every one of those faces would have to go through me,” Karolina affirms.

Shiv is weary in her silence, and despite her instincts, Karolina grabs her hand from underneath the table.

“It’ll be fine,” she says. “All of them know how integral it is to have a female voice on the panel tomorrow. We can’t have Rocket Man and Rape Me fronting a situation like this, can we?”

Shiv looks down, worrying her lip slightly.

“What is it?” Karolina asks.

“It just—” Shiv shakes her head, “It feels like I’m losing favor. This can’t go wrong.”

Although Karolina’s entire job is influencing public response—she’s not entirely clairvoyant. She can’t know what people are going to think about Shiv Roy stepping into the role of the spokesperson for a company she doesn’t work for without it looking entirely pandered, and she doesn’t know how it’s going to look internally—despite the fact that nobody’s opinion below the executive floor matters much anyway—but, she does know that this is a huge deal, and huge favor, and the people who really matter shouldn’t take it lightly. Shouldn’t is always the keyword.

“You’re ready,” Karolina says. “We’re going to murder board the hell out of you three tomorrow. You’ll have a response to everything. Just stick to the script.”

“Stick to the script,” Shiv says. She leans in closer, suddenly smirking, “Got any other scripts you want to show me?”

Karolina squeezes her hand and then drops it, biting back a smile as Shiv shifts in impatience.

“If this panel goes well, I might just think of something.”

If.

“You sure there aren’t any we can workshop right now?” Shiv asks. She lowers her voice. “I’d really like to see that murder board you mentioned.”

“No,” Karolina says, though she knows she doesn’t sound confident. “We’re getting up early tomorrow.”

“Oh, come on,” Shiv says. “You really want to spend the rest of the night watching Tom cockblock himself?”

“And here I thought I was in the clear of hearing about him for the rest of the night.”

“You know he’s been talking about buying a vineyard?” Shiv asks.

Karolina downs the rest of her drink.

“If I take you to my room, can we please stop talking about Tom?”

Shiv can’t hide her smile.

“Only one way to find out.”

—

Karolina isn’t sure how it starts.

From her perspective, the panel goes well. It’s not entirely what they planned, what, with three conflicting personalities sharing one stage, but it worked. They got the message across: Waystar is taking the matter seriously, and they’re not leaving it in the hands of the same kinds of people who buried it under the rug all those years ago. Simple, effective. Condemn and move on. Except, if there’s one thing about the Roy family, it’s that none of them know how to fucking move on.

She’s in the corner of the room with a few members of her team, working on their rapid response plan for once word of the panel inevitably gets out. She’s only half-listening when the siblings re-enter, unsurprisingly still arguing about the events onstage. It’s the usual, Kendall mad at Shiv, and Shiv mad at Kendall, and Roman instigating so it seems like he did anything at all, the conversation not grabbing Karolina’s attention when Marcia’s voice peaks out from the group, a scolding for Shiv, of all people.

Karolina makes her way to the other side of the room, but there’s a building chaos in the short walk and she knows she’s too late to calm any of them with positive public response or statistics. It’s several voices escalating in volume until Logan’s rises above them all, and then there’s a loud crack, and suddenly Roman’s holding Kendall back, a jumble of “Don’t fucking touch her!” and “What the hell, Dad?” and Gerri’s eyes are flitting between Logan’s and Karolina’s, a frantic sort of resolve seeping out of her as she asks, “It played well, right Karolina? They’re saying it played well.”

“It played well,” Karolina automatically confirms, her heart pulsing through her throat as she shifts her eyes on Shiv, hunched over and gripping the side of her face. She doesn’t know what to do with her hands as Kendall and Tom attempt to inspect the wound, a futile effort anyway as Shiv finally regains some composure.

“It’s fine—I’m fine,” Shiv says, dodging the flurry of worried arms and voices as she escapes the room. “Someone get him a fucking Quaalude.”

Broken bits of Shiv’s, now fallen, champagne glass crackle under Tom’s steps as he trails behind her, and it’s only a few seconds between the door slamming shut and Gerri taking charge. Marcia takes Logan away—where to, Karolina doesn’t want to know—and Karolina feels a light tugging on her elbow, and suddenly Gerri’s pulling her into a corner. Gerri looks annoyed, and Karolina wonders if it’s at all similar to the seething sort of rage that’s simmering around in her at what they were just forced to witness, or if it’s closer to inconvenience—another tally on Gerri’s shit-list that she’ll never actually do anything about.

Gerri searches her eyes and under the scrutiny, Karolina crosses her arms, if only to hide the light tremble that she knows is coursing through her hands. Gerri, knowing her better than anyone, knows this as well, reaching out and gripping Karolina’s forearm. She rubs her thumb soothingly up and down, a peace offering before the barking of orders.

“I need you here,” Gerri says softly. Karolina clears her throat.

“I’m here,” she says. Gerri looks guilty for a moment after she’s said it, and Karolina can imagine why, because this isn’t the first time they’ve been in this situation—Karolina troubled by the Logan of it all and Gerri silently pleading with her to keep it together for just another hour—and it’s not unlike the other times Gerri’s sent her the same apologetic regret, as if Karolina’s career at Waystar is something she should’ve stopped all those years ago rather than encouraged. She didn’t always understand it, Gerri’s self-imposed debt felt owed to Karolina, but she thinks she’s starting to now.

Shiv never would’ve been here today if it weren’t for her. She never would’ve been on that stage, saying those things, pissing Logan off enough to do that, if it weren’t for decisions that Karolina had made, had said were good, foolproof even. She’s at fault, a backhand by proxy that she can almost feel pulsing in her own knuckles—an apology she’ll never be able to fulfill, a regret she will never live down.

“I’m here,” she says again, if only to ground herself, and Gerri looks wary, but she nods anyway.

“Okay,” Gerri says, sighing. “Okay, just—go see if Tom needs any help. He still has appearances to make if it can be helped, so—”

“I’ve got it, Gerri,” Karolina says. “Comms will get started on Logan’s statement regarding the panel, if asked. Once that’s briefed, we need everyone on the same page.”

Gerri’s visibly relieved at Karolina’s assertiveness, and she uses that reaction to anchor herself further as Gerri squeezes her arm once more and returns to the leftover crowd, giving everyone firm orders as Karolina leaves the room.

She spots Tom a few halls down, knocking repeatedly on a door that’s clearly not going to be opened.

“Tom,” Karolina says, his worried gaze meeting hers. She doesn’t know what he knows, doesn’t know what he suspects, but he doesn’t look at her with the same kind of threatening contempt he usually does. Right now, it’s just concern. Karolina speaks low, not wanting to be heard through the door. “She say anything?”

Tom shakes his head. “Hasn’t said a word.”

“Okay,” Karolina sighs. “Look—obviously this is, extenuating, but Gerri is requesting that continue the conference as planned—”

“Karolina—”

“Tom—”

“I’m her husband,” he hisses, and they both freeze. Karolina doesn’t want to say it, doesn’t have to say what she is to Shiv, because it’s her hesitation and his response to it—that flash of recognition that if it were Tom, Shiv wanted, he would’ve been through that door already. She’d almost feel bad for him if he wasn’t actively keeping her from getting Shiv help. “Just—keep me in the loop.”

She waits until he’s gone to knock on the door.

“Shiv?” she calls out. “It’s just me.”

It’s a little while before the lock clicks, and Karolina opens the door carefully, unsure of what she’ll find. It’s not entirely unexpected—bloodied towels on the counter, a disheveled Shiv going back and forth between rinsing out her mouth and attempting to apply pressure—but Karolina doesn’t think any amount of bracing could’ve prepared her for the sight anyway. She locks the door behind her.

“Here to serve the gag order?” Shiv asks, and Karolina has enough humility left in her to feel ashamed that it’s not out of the realm of possibility. Still, she doesn’t dignify the comment with a response.

“To check on you,” she corrects. Shiv pauses in front of the sink, her hands resting on the porcelain bowl. The injured side of her face is hidden from Karolina’s view, and if it weren’t for the splotchy mascara and the red tint of Shiv’s nose, Karolina might not have known anything was wrong at all.

“He meant to hit Roman,” Shiv says, as if it makes the situation any better. Karolina’s not so sure it does, but Shiv sounds sure of it, as if the knowledge that the backhand was meant for someone else can somehow absolve her of experiencing it like she’s the one who got hit. But she was.

“Okay,” Karolina says, even though she doesn’t believe her, and she’s certain Shiv doesn’t either as she turns on the faucet, eyes focused fervently on her hands as she scrubs at imaginary filth. The blood is already gone, so it must be the feeling.

Karolina makes it about fifteen seconds into Shiv’s erratic scrubbing until she can’t watch any longer.

“Shiv,” she says calmly, placing a hand on Shiv’s back. Shiv falters slightly, tensing under Karolina’s touch but not stopping, scrubbing at her nail beds as if she’d spent the entire day digging. Sometimes it’s all Shiv seems to know how to do; dig until her fingertips are raw and her head’s gone too far under far too quickly for Karolina to keep up. By the time Karolina gets there, the hole’s been filled. Whatever Shiv has buried is deep, and whatever Karolina hopes to find will take a lengthy excavation of her own, but that’s usually. This time around, Karolina doesn’t have to search for what Shiv’s trying to bury. It’s red and it’s angry and it’s in the shape of a human hand across the side of Shiv’s face, and Karolina saw it happen. Shiv knows she saw it happen.

Karolina shuts off the faucet before she even really thinks about it, and Shiv pauses, her hands still hovering in the sink. Karolina reaches around her and grabs a clean towel, drying Shiv’s hands wordlessly. She’s surprised that Shiv lets her, surprised that Shiv hasn’t run off already, adamant that she doesn’t need this, that she doesn’t need Karolina, and she’s surprised when Shiv turns around, her arms crossed and thousand-yard stare piercing the entirety of Karolina’s gut. She can see the wound in full now, harsh on Shiv’s pale skin and only getting worse by the second.

And what can she say? I’m sorry he did that. I’m sorry he used you in the face of scandal and then got mad when you tried to make it better. I’m sorry that you were only doing what you were told. I’m sorry that I’m a part of it. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.

How many times can she apologize for the things she can’t control? How many times will she have to look Shiv in the eye and apologize for being a bystander to it all anyway?

“Can I look?” she asks. She doesn’t think she has to; the sound of it was enough to know that the hit would leave a mark, and though it’s not a lot of blood, she wasn’t expecting as much as there actually is.

“Please?” she tries again, like Shiv would be doing her a favor. She thinks Shiv would be, because it’s Karolina at fault here—Karolina’s fault they said yes to the panel, her fault they even let Shiv on that stage—and Shiv lets out a deep, uneven breath and turns slightly, allowing Karolina access to the injury. She winces as Karolina pokes and prods, opens her jaw when Karolina asks her to open it, closes it when she asks her to close it. She discovers the main source of the blood—a loose molar and a chunk of skin missing from the inside of Shiv’s cheek, both of which feel terrible to call lucky, so she doesn’t call them anything at all.

She grabs the wet towel, slowly dabbing at Shiv’s face to clean the lingering mascara and blood, and Shiv closes her eyes, letting Karolina work.

“You did everything right,” Karolina eventually says, because she can’t bear to bring up blame.

“Doesn’t fucking feel like it,” Shiv mumbles.

“I know,” Karolina says. She sets the towel down, her hand coming to rest on the unharmed side of Shiv’s face, thumb grazing the soft skin lightly. Shiv opens her eyes, narrow and distant in the name of resolve, and it’s only a moment before the weight of it all catches up to her and takes her down. She drops her head into the crook of Karolina’s neck, her cries coming out like silent pleas to just make it fucking better, and Karolina doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t know how to start helping beyond the logistical mess of it all.

If they started driving now, how fast could they get back to the city? Should they charter a helicopter instead? How long before the pain sets in Shiv’s brain catches up to the loose molar? How soon could they get something heftier than extra-strength aspirin? Should she take something non-drowsy? What if she has a concussion? Can she take a fucking horse tranquilizer? Is there something that can make her forget? Something that can send them back in time and do everything differently, change whatever’s allowed them to make it to this point?

She holds Shiv tighter, like maybe the more of her that’s touching Shiv, the better she can absorb all of the hurt and replace it with something else. Dull it, at the very least. She’s still unsure of what to say, the right things all seemingly evading her. The simple ones come to the forefront, like what you’d ask a child with a freshly skinned knee, screaming their head off in the middle of the street. Are you injured or are you shocked? But Karolina’s not a mother, and nobody ever bandaged up her scrapes and bruises. It’s a level of comfort she dreads being asked of, something she and Shiv had successfully avoided throughout their entire entanglement, but Shiv didn’t ask for this, and Karolina doesn’t think she’s ever really had anyone to bandage up her bumps and bruises either, so if Karolina is the person Shiv’s letting through that locked door, she’s going to do what needs to be done.

“Does it hurt?” she asks once it seems Shiv’s calmed down a little. She’ll do the job; she just never said it wouldn’t be done poorly.

“What do you think?” Shiv says, pulling away.

Karolina sighs, pulling out her phone. “We need to get you to a dentist.”

“No,” Shiv immediately says. “No—I’m not going to some fucking hokey emergency dentist out here in Bumfuck. I’ll go to my dentist in the morning.”

Karolina doesn’t have to do the math to know that’s far too long to sit with a loose tooth without any medical intervention. Beyond the possible concussion, or jaw injury, or infection risk—

“We need to get you checked out, Shiv,” Karolina says. She must sound serious, because it’s enough for Shiv to lock eyes with her, and it takes all of Karolina’s resolve to stay calm as the tears begin to pool in Shiv’s eyes again. Somehow, she holds her gaze, ignoring the light drum in her stomach when Shiv huffs, her eyes moving to the ceiling.

“As if this isn’t already humiliating enough,” Shiv mumbles. She looks back at Karolina, a wordless sort of pleading that Karolina doesn’t know how to say no to. “I just want to go, Karolina.”

Karolina grips her phone, swallowing down her concerns. She nods, knowing it’s not the time to pick a fight.

“Do you want to see Tom first?” Karolina asks. Normally, she’d be thrilled by Shiv's response. Right now, it’s just sad.

“No,” Shiv says.

“Shiv—”

“It’s fucking embarrassing,” Shiv whispers. “Okay? I just—I just want to leave.”

It’s the unsaid that Karolina clings onto, that somehow Karolina has positioned herself in a place where Shiv is comfortable, a place where the embarrassment is dulled and she’s free to feel, despite Karolina’s perceptions of herself, despite her job, despite her role in all of this, and she won’t let Shiv down. Helicopter, she’s decided.

“I’ll go talk to him and get the flight situated,” she says, but then she stops at the door.

“Shiv—” Shiv looks at her, and Karolina doesn’t know if this is the first time this has happened, if every strike that was meant for Roman actually went to him, or if this is just another occurrence on an itemized list of occurrences, but words sit at the tip of Karolina’s tongue, things she wishes someone had been around to tell her all those years ago, things she wishes she could have understood sooner, first time or not. “It’s not humiliating. It feels that way, but—they all care about you. They do, and they don’t think any less of you.”

Karolina leaves before Shiv has to come up with a response, and she’s grateful that their exile goes smoothly. In some twist of fate, Tom still has to show face at the conference, so she lets him feel useful by having him call in an emergency fill of a narcotic for the ride. She’s hedging her bets on no concussion, supported by the fact that Shiv hasn’t had any claim of a headache and by her refusal to even stop by the summit’s medical staff for a quick check-up. Shiv’s out by the time the helicopter is in the air, and Karolina tries multiple times to get some rest herself with no success, her eyes continuously drawn to the sleeping bundle of red hair on her shoulder, not in her lap because she dazedly agreed to at least wear the seatbelt on the flight if she was going to make Karolina commit fifty other acts of negligence in one night.

Shiv wakes drowsily when they land, and she gets her way in the car when Karolina lets her forgo the seatbelt in favor of resting her head in Karolina’s lap. Karolina spends the duration of the ride brushing her fingers through Shiv’s hair, careful not to touch the swollen skin as it stares up at her. She has the driver go straight to her apartment, because she doesn’t know where to go, but Karolina’s place seems like the safer option, away from prying eyes, away from Tom.

Karolina knows they’ve been distant lately, half of her conversations with Shiv filled with verbose rants over him. If she were Tom, she’d feel pretty shitty right now, but she can’t blame Shiv. It’s hard to seek comfort from someone who’s got one hand in yours and the other in the one that hit you. She’s not entirely sure what makes her different from Tom in this case; they both know that if what happened tonight leaks it’ll be Karolina crafting the narrative, it’ll be Karolina reminding the world that Logan Roy is a tremendous father and while he’s been recovering smoothly, we’d all do well to remember what a strain the past year has been on Mr. Roy’s health.

A confused old man accidentally hits his daughter. It’s a tale so old she actually thinks it might be better for the Roy family if it did leak, tugging on the heartstrings of the American public in the midst of a scandal. See? They’re victims too. All of them. Then, the car runs over a hefty pothole just a block down from Karolina’s building and Shiv winces deeply in her half-slumber, the pads of her fingers digging lightly into Karolina’s thigh, and Karolina regrets thinking it at all.

Maybe that’s the difference; if Karolina were to dig deep, she’d be one hand in Shiv’s and one hand adjacent to Logan’s, and right now, the hand that’s adjacent to Logan is full of a shaking kind of vitriol that she doesn’t think Tom could ever stomach holding over him. Condemn and move on. How can Karolina move on from this? The thing that isn’t, finally in front of their faces, and splattered across Shiv’s in shitty red splotches.

When they pull up in front of Karolina’s building, she drags her feet waking Shiv up. Her doorman gets their bags, and she waits until she imagines he’s about halfway to her front door when she starts kneading her hand into Shiv’s arm, murmuring a soft, “We’re here,” as she does so. Shiv stirs slowly, and Karolina instantaneously feels bad as Shiv’s brows furrow, her whole body tensing up in Karolina’s lap. That means it hurts, and there’s not much else they can do about it at this hour.

“Can you make it up?” Karolina asks, silently hoping that the answer is yes, because the only other alternative is Karolina tipping her doorman to carry Shiv up, and she isn’t so sure which one of them would hate that more.

“Yeah,” Shiv says, her voice nearly sick with pain as she slowly rises from Karolina’s lap.

Karolina steps out of the car first, relieved when the change in lighting seems to have no effect on Shiv. She holds out a hand and Shiv takes it, eyes hanging low as they make their way up to Karolina’s apartment. When they get in, Shiv’s got the bathroom first, Karolina digging around in her medicine cabinet for anything they can mix with what Shiv’s already taken.

Her mind wanders to how normal it is, Shiv’s toothbrush hidden in a drawer, Shiv’s extra clothes with their own shelf in Karolina’s closet, the side of Karolina’s bed that grows colder every night she spends alone. It feels normal, except Karolina’s rummaging around in her medicine cabinet to find a suitable secondary painkiller so Shiv doesn’t spend the entire night writhing in pain because her father nearly knocked her teeth out. Karolina takes a deep breath as she pours out a dose. Her phone lights up out of the corner of her eye every few minutes, likely texts from Gerri and emails from her assistant, and she puts it in her pocket without glancing at the screen, taking the pills and a cup of water to the bathroom.

She finds Shiv with a clean face, inspecting the damage under the harsh light. She sets the water and the pills on the counter, engulfing Shiv in a hug from behind. Shiv instinctively closes her eyes, leaning some of her weight against Karolina as they stand there. Karolina finally has a better look at the fully bloomed wound as well, Shiv’s skin a myriad of different colors trailing from her jawline toward her cheekbone. The worst is on the lower half, swollen slightly, no doubt in part due to the loose tooth. Karolina wishes she were good for anything more than damage control, better at anything other than closing doors and sweeping under rugs, but reasons that’s maybe what Shiv does need—someone to help her clean up the mess.

“Take these,” Karolina says, holding the pills in front of Shiv. Shiv sighs as she grabs them from Karolina, not meeting her eyes through the mirror, and she washes them down with a wince that Karolina assumes is downplayed based on the fact that Shiv didn’t even open her jaw wide enough to let anything more than the pills in. Karolina tries not to dwell on it. She kisses Shiv’s unharmed cheek lightly, and Shiv squeezes one of Karolina’s hands before escaping the embrace to go into the bedroom.

Karolina takes her time as she cleans up, somewhat selfishly she feels as she listens to Shiv rummaging through drawers all alone in her bedroom. It’s not the violence itself that’s still making her hands a little too clammy and her heart beat a little too fast, maybe more so the reminder. It’s like you’d ask a child, are you injured or are you shocked? Karolina would venture to say shocked. Fathers hitting their daughters, a tale as old as time, but it’s not so much a tale when it’s right in front of her. And now it’s in her home. It’s snuck its way under her door frame and into her bed, and it feels somewhat like the first time, a ripe eight-years-old and powerless as her mother cries, so confused as to why any of this is happening at all and terrified to so much as make a move, might she make it all worse somehow. In this case, the only thing she can do is keep moving, keep going forward in the event that something she does can make it better.

Shiv is already in bed by the time she returns to the bedroom, drowning in one of Karolina’s old sleep shirts, and she shakes off the feeling of yet another thing being tainted—her bed, her mirror, her shirt, her pillow, her Shiv. It doesn’t feel fair to say, because Shiv has always been wounded and it’s never changed much. She’s always walked around with a gaping hole in her chest whether she ever wanted anyone to notice or not, but the difference now is that she can’t hide it, and Karolina can’t choose to not look at it.

She climbs in bed next to Shiv, careful not to disturb her too much as she settles down, unsure of how close she’s wanted, but Shiv immediately leans back into Karolina and she assumes she’s wanted plenty, dropping a light kiss to the crown of Shiv’s head.

“How does it feel?” she asks.

“It’s bearable,” Shiv says, and bearable doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt, so Karolina just smooths Shiv’s hair, waiting for Shiv to fall asleep.

—

Shiv doesn’t talk about it. Not really. She wakes up the next morning and she makes an emergency dentist appointment, and she doesn’t even ask Karolina to go with, not in those words entirely, but she does say they’ll likely have to put her under, and Karolina doesn’t have to think twice before saying that she’ll call the driver and go with, just in case.

It’s a uniquely infuriating kind of feeling, having Shiv curled up on her couch with perpetually teary eyes and an ice pack hiding a mess of bruising that had only gotten worse overnight. Karolina had felt sick when she woke up and saw it, as if she’d been tricking herself into believing it wasn’t as hard of a hit as it actually was, a lighter bruising even pooling under her eye.

Karolina’s grateful that it’s a scheduled travel day for the executive team, hoping the pseudo-day off will give her the time to figure out how she’s going to face Logan when she returns to the office. How she’s going to pretend that Shiv doesn’t mean anything to her this time around, that her loyalty is to Waystar and by extension Logan, and that his image her top priority even though every time she thinks about him the only thing she can see is her own father’s backhand racing down for a strike. She knows it’s a mess of her own making. No one gave her the handbook, but she saw the signs, and she stayed. She welcomed it into her life and made herself a part of it. She tricks herself. She lets Logan yell at her until her legs feel like Jell-O and her tongue is crawling down the inside of her own throat and then an hour later, she laughs about it by the coffee cart as if it’s just all just some small misunderstanding. They all do it, they downplay and they pretend, because it’s easier than dealing with the truth.

Even now, molar hanging on by a literal thread, any emotion Shiv’s carried over from the night previous has been replaced with an it’s fine, it’s not that bad, and Karolina knows that’s what Shiv is accustomed to. Knows that Shiv shutting her eyes tight and talking as normally as she can through a tight and swollen jaw while on the phone with Tom is all she knows how to do. To satiate everyone else completely. Forget that it’s a big deal, just move on.

Karolina doesn’t understand how not to make this a big deal, but she doesn’t want to make it more difficult for Shiv. She doesn’t shove another ice pack in Shiv’s face when she gets off the phone, doesn’t question why the pills she left out are sitting untouched on the nightstand, doesn’t even bother to tease Shiv over wearing another item of clothing from Karolina’s closet like she normally would; she barely wants to breathe, afraid to mess up whatever semblance of equilibrium is left in Shiv’s orbit in case anything at all turns out to be the last straw.

She briefly wonders if it’s worse this way, dancing around the hard truth that Shiv Roy is a human, not immune to having pierceable skin and breakable bones, but she figures this is how Shiv wants it; downplayed. If Shiv doesn’t take a pill, then Karolina doesn’t have to know that it hurts.

The only thing is that Karolina does know that it hurts. She can feel the sharp pain that splinters from the hinge of her jaw to the base of her neck. Understands the earache, the weary, tired eyes, the persistent taste of iron in her mouth, and the way that everything seems to move a little slower, feel a little less real. She knows so much yet so little, because she’s not inside Shiv’s mind and she can’t tell what Shiv’s thinking, so she doesn’t hover. She just does what she’s asked, and she does what she can, and she doesn’t pressure Shiv into doing what she can’t.

She ignores the too-pale hands that clutch around her arm on the way down to the car, doesn’t pull out her phone when it buzzes a dozen different times because she doesn’t want Shiv to see all the names of the people who have let her down in the last thirty-two years as they come up on her caller-id, and puts on her most dazzling smile inside the dentist’s office as Shiv recounts the story that’s caused her ailment; an embarrassing tumble during some turbulence on the private jet. I should’ve listened to the stewardess—guess it’s one way to make time for the dentist, right?

Karolina makes sure to write the cover story down in her notes. It’s not the first she’s ever had on file for a Roy, and it’s not even the first that’s left her feeling wrong and wondering if she’s ever had any morals to begin with, but it is the first that she can’t reason with. She can’t decipher a why she’s doing it at all, the only lingering explanation is that it’s for Shiv. She’s doing what Shiv wants. What Shiv needs. She recalls Shiv’s quiet confidence walking into the examination room with the dentist, like she hadn’t been squeezing Karolina’s hand up to the very point that the car door opened outside the building, and she wonders what else she’s missed, how many other things she’s allowed Shiv to shrug off without question.

She swallows down the thought, settling into the private waiting room that she imagines the hokey dentist in Bumfuck wouldn’t have had. She pulls out her phone, searching for one voice on the other end of the line.

“Prognosis?” Gerri asks. Karolina’s relieved to hear her voice, relieved to hear anything beyond Shiv’s pain-induced silence and her own racing thoughts. She can hear fading voices in the background of Gerri’s end, meaning they’re likely not on the road yet.

“That we don’t get paid enough,” Karolina can’t stop herself from saying, even though she knows deep down that at this point, there’s no world where her debt with Shiv requires any payment at all. Because wasn’t it just a few weeks ago that she was wiping blood from Kendall’s nose? Getting him blow because even though they all know he should be the last person contacting shareholders, she did it anyway? She’s a cacophony of transactions, but she’s losing sight of a number that excuses any of it. Gerri sighs on the other end.

“Negotiations are off,” she says.

Karolina knows it’s wrong that her immediate reaction is satisfaction, because she also knows how much this is going to impact the shitstorm that’s already clouding each of them, but she can’t help it. It feels like some sort of check and balance in the name of a restorative justice that will never be served, and she holds onto it. It’s something.

“And the article?” Karolina asks. Gerri makes no note of the fact that it’s Karolina’s job to know.

“We’re moving to internal investigations,” Gerri says. “We’ll be outsourcing a firm—no word yet on who our lucky match will be.”

“Great,” Karolina says, and even though it’s a private room, she still speaks lower. “Your bases are covered, right?”

“Blindsided by the article,” Gerri feigns. It’s another painful reminder of who they are and what they do, and though Karolina was blindsided, a part of her always knew. The rumors about cruises were inescapable in the PR department and there are no rumors at Waystar that come without basis.

“I don’t know when I’ll be in the office, but there’s no official communication that doesn’t go through me,” Karolina says. “We have enough messes.”

She hates to refer to her current predicament as a mess, because it’s nothing she feels burdened to clean up. Nobody’s forcing her to sit in this dentist's office, and certainly nobody’s forcing her to open her apartment doors, and her bed sheets, and her top left dresser drawer, but she can’t say that. Not even to Gerri.

“How’s our archeologist?” Gerri asks.

“Undergoing a root canal,” Karolina says. “They can save the tooth, so, some good news, I guess.”

“Good,” Gerri says. Karolina can hear papers shuffling in the background, and she’s dreading the amount of catch-up she’s going to have to do just from missing one day in the office. “Where’s her head at?”

“I think she’d like to pretend it never happened,” Karolina admits. Shiv hasn’t said it yet, but she can’t imagine this being the hill that Shiv Roy would choose to die on. Gerri hums on the other end, and Karolina can guess how the rest of the trip is going. She can only hope someone did actually get Logan a fucking Quaalude.

“Logan would be pleased with that,” Gerri says, and even though she says it sarcastically, the sentiment alone is enough to crack Karolina’s outward indifference.

“Well, as long as Logan’s pleased,” she snipes. Gerri’s silent on the other end for a moment and Karolina waits for the usual lecture, that Karolina cares too much and you’re not their babysitter, Karolina, just do what’s in your purview and nothing more, which is always cheap talk coming from Gerri anyway, but it doesn’t come.

“And how’s your head?” Gerri asks.

Karolina sighs, running a hand over her eyes. They both know this call was never about business. “Haven’t had any complaints, Ger.”

“Very funny,” Gerri says, and Karolina can’t find it in herself to be too satisfied, but she can picture the look of fond disdain in Gerri’s silence, and she finds a little bit of comfort in the image. “Seriously, Karolina…if you need the cavalry to step in—"

“It’s fine, Gerri,” Karolina says. “I’m fine.”

Because Gerri knows. She’s heard the stories and she’s seen the remnants herself. She’s the first pair of eyes on Karolina the second Logan’s a little too aggressive and the first voice in her ear when she thinks Karolina’s about to crack, but it’s different this time. It’s not about her, it’s about being there for Shiv.

“She’s not your responsibility,” Gerri finally says. It’s an act of protection, Karolina knows this, and she can rationalize Gerri’s point of view—Karolina inserting herself into a ticking time bomb of a family, putting herself right at the center of something she’s spent her entire adult life trying to escape—but Karolina had never done anything to earn Gerri’s protection. It was something Gerri decided on, something she felt she could give, and it shouldn’t be any different for Karolina. Gerri’s right, Shiv isn’t her responsibility, but Karolina still owes her something. There’s a sense of security that Shiv is now cashing in. If Karolina were to break that, what would it make her?

“I think we both know that’s not true,” Karolina replies.

Gerri doesn’t have anything to say to that.

—

Karolina’s created an entire action plan for monitoring news about cruises and drafted up about four different press releases by the time Shiv gets out (her favorite is the one where she’s announcing Hugo’s retirement).

Shiv seems to be in a lot less pain after the procedure, hunkering down on Karolina’s couch as soon as they get back to the apartment. Karolina’s still trying her best not to hover, but there’s also a part of her that can’t settle down, so she compromises by sitting on the couch adjacent to Shiv and opens her laptop for the first time in over twenty-four hours. She forwards the action plan to her team for review and does a few indirect searches regarding Waystar and the news. It’s not as bad as she was fearing. There’s a bit of a rocky perception from the conference that’s mostly shrouded in inconsistent messaging, but it’s nothing she can’t work with.

It’s a while before Shiv stirs, and Karolina doesn’t take the time for granted, ordering soft groceries and panic-searching everything she can about root canals and molar splinting and if there’s somehow still a risk of concussion even though it’s been a full twenty-four hours and Shiv has never even once complained about a headache.

She left a pair of pills out on the coffee table, a light prescription from the dentist should Shiv need it, and she pretends not to watch when Shiv finally sits up and analyzes the display as Karolina types away. Shiv takes them, Karolina glad that she’s no longer participating in whatever emotionally charged abstinence she was displaying earlier in the day. Shiv leaves the room wordlessly, and Karolina distracts herself with work while she waits for Shiv to return, careful to listen out for any signs that might make her needed. She’s about to give in and check on Shiv when she appears back in the living room, a pillow from Karolina’s bed in her hand, and she lays down right up against Karolina. Karolina instinctively drops a hand in Shiv’s hair, scratching lightly as Shiv gets comfortable again.

“You need anything?” Karolina asks.

“Just this,” Shiv says quietly. “And to not have wires poking my cheeks like I’m fucking fourteen.”

“I can only help with one of those things, unfortunately,” Karolina says, brushing back a lock of hair.

“Really?” Shiv hums. “You’re supposed to be a fixer.”

It’s not meant to be a jab, but Karolina can’t help the way it hits her. Fixing something like this is out of her depth, no matter how much she wishes it wasn’t.

“How’s the rest of it?” Karolina asks. The dentist checked out Shiv’s jaw, figuring it was most likely just sore from the hit, but did refer Shiv to a specialist in case there are any lasting issues. Karolina, naturally, is on edge about the possibility of another complication, but Shiv doesn’t need that from her. She needs reassurance, a strong hand to hold. Not shaky.

“Hurts,” Shiv says. “Maybe Dad’s true calling was the ring.”

Shiv can’t see Karolina, so she doesn’t even attempt feigned amusement. She doesn’t think that’s what Shiv was going for anyway, what, with the deadpan tone and the fully deepened bruise. It’s then, that Shiv’s phone rings from the coffee table. They both look at it, Dad, popping up in big bright letters on the caller ID. Shiv’s knuckles pale as her hand clenches into a tight fist, her thumbnail worrying itself into the skin of her fingers.

“You don’t have to answer it,” Karolina reassures. Shiv nods, digging a hand into her eyes. She must hit her bad eye the wrong way, because she yelps out in pain before her entire body goes rigid under Karolina’s hand.

“What is it?” Karolina asks worriedly, sitting up. Shiv exhales slowly, her body releasing some of the tension as she does so, but her face still clearly expressing the discomfort she must be feeling as she attempts to breathe through the pain.

“I just—moved too fast,” Shiv says.

“Okay,” Karolina says. “That’s okay, let’s just take it easy. I’m going to get some ice.”

Shiv nods and Karolina carefully gets up, once again pushing back the immediate concern that comes with Shiv not denying care. She returns to the living room with the ice pack and kneels in front of the couch, brushing a thumb across Shiv’s forehead as she hands it over. Shiv hesitantly holds it against the side of her face, and Karolina continues to brush Shiv’s hair, waiting patiently for her breathing to return to a normal pattern, and she’s relieved when it does.

“Why don’t we get comfortable in bed?” Karolina asks, and Shiv shakes her head lightly right away.

“No,” Shiv says. “Can we—will you stay here?”

“Of course,” Karolina says. It’s not often Shiv asks her for anything—she’s barely asked anything of Karolina throughout this entire ordeal—and even if she did, Karolina would never say no. “I’m wherever you want me.”

She gets back on the couch, and Shiv settles against her once more. Karolina draws light patterns along her side, only pausing when her laptop dings with an email, and she closes it before they have to hear any more.

“I’m sorry,” Shiv says, her voice thick with exhaustion.

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Karolina says. “And you don’t have to talk to me right now, either.”

“It’s fine, I just—forgot about my eye,” Shiv says. Forgot. As in, Shiv’s not used to having shiners that she has to be careful not to touch, and she shouldn’t be. She shouldn’t even have one to be careful with in the first place. Karolina tries not to dwell on that part of the conversation, doesn’t want her anger to seep through the comfort that she’s supposed to be supplying.

“Just, don’t push it, Shiv,” she ends up saying.

“That’s my big skill, Kay,” Shiv says. Karolina’s heart lurches at the nickname, Shiv’s voice far too frail and far too defeated.

“You did what was asked of you,” Karolina says. What I asked of you. “You tried to make things better.”

“I don’t even know why I did,” Shiv says. “I should’ve just let Kendall have his fucking moment.”

“With that plausible deniability bullshit?” Karolina asks. “You said some hard truths, Shiv. That isn’t a crime.”

And the punishment certainly didn’t fit the bill.

“Still, I should’ve known better,” Shiv argues lightly.

“Should’ves won’t get you anywhere,” Karolina says. “You could’ve read a script Logan had written himself, and this still would’ve happened.”

Shiv is silent as she mulls over the words. They both know Karolina’s right, that nothing is good enough for Logan Roy unless it’s his words coming out of his own mouth. Shiv removes the ice pack and Karolina reaches out to put it on the table for her. She intertwines their hands, shivering slightly at how cold Shiv’s is.

“I don’t know where to go from here,” Shiv eventually says. “What to say to him.”

“You don’t have to say anything,” Karolina tells her. “This isn’t your mistake to fix.”

“You don’t know what it’s like with him. Everything is our fucking fault.”

“I know what it’s like—”

“To work for him,” Shiv interrupts. “Not to have him as a dad.”

Karolina brings Shiv’s hand to her lips gently. Shiv’s skin still smells like the lavender body wash she likes to steal out of Karolina’s bathroom, and it’s nothing like blood, or sweat, or angry fathers.

“I had my own dad, Shiv,” Karolina says. “Nothing was ever good enough for him, either.”

Shiv stills, her fingers fidgeting in Karolina’s hand.

“I mean, but did he…” Her voice trails off, but Karolina doesn’t have to work very hard to figure out what the question is supposed to be.

“He did,” Karolina says quietly. “And thinking about everything that I should’ve done—it never made anything better. There’s no world where he wanted to be anything other than what he was. It took me a long time to accept that.”

Shiv sits up and Karolina meets her troubled eyes with a calm gaze. Shiv looks her up and down as if she’s inspecting her, like she can’t quite imagine the Karolina she knows ever having any man-made imperfections. Karolina knows when a light scar catches Shiv’s eye, remnants of a thinly split brow in ’98, one that’s difficult to notice unless you’re searching. It was a humiliating affair that left her facing reality for the first time when she was a doe-eyed intern at Waystar and a certain member of the legal department who’d taken her on as some sort of mentee inquired why she came back from the Thanksgiving holiday roughed up. Karolina said she had brothers; her background check didn’t add up.

(Then came a small note on the inside of her planner reading that she’d have to get better at cover-ups if she wanted a future in PR. The next half was an address, and an open invitation for the winter holiday should she choose not to spend it with her brothers.)

Shiv brushes her thumb across the scar, faded and not Karolina’s biggest takeaway from that period of her life, and Karolina grabs the hand, bringing Shiv’s knuckles to her lips once more. Shiv’s eyebrows are furrowed in a pitiful sort of sadness that she doesn’t mind too much coming from Shiv. Coming from someone who understands.

“What are you thinking?” Karolina asks.

Shiv shakes her head lightly and sniffs. “That I’m tired of this bullshit,” she says, attempting to keep the tears at bay. “That I don’t know if I can walk away.”

Karolina takes a deep breath, attempting to not let the conversation get to her the way it feels like it is, poking and prodding at her gut.

“You don’t have to,” Karolina says. “You don’t have to do anything. All of it, it’s your choice.”

“But you walked away?” Shiv asks, as if Karolina has the right answer. She wishes she did.

“Shiv, my father…there was no room for conversation,” Karolina says, unable to control the slight shake in her voice. “If I kept going back—”

She doesn’t like to think about it, the way his anger kept building the less it seemed she needed him. Just like she doesn’t indulge in should’ves, she doesn’t like to think about the what ifs. Staying just wasn’t an option.

Logan seems to carry the same propensity for rage, but with a level of regret that sucks everyone back in. She doesn’t know what she would do in Shiv’s position either; it’s not hard to go back to someone who understands that they’re supposed to say sorry. And maybe that’s why she’s put up with Logan for so long herself. It’s nice to imagine a father who knows what he does is wrong, even if that doesn’t make it right.

“I’m sorry you went through that,” Shiv says, but the words sound wrong coming out of her mouth.

“I’m sorry, too,” Karolina says. Then a nagging question appears on her tongue, one that’s been eating away at her from the moment she stepped into that bathroom. “You said—that he meant to hit Roman?”

Shiv looks away then, as if guilty of something.

“He wouldn’t—I mean, it wasn’t often, but he—” Shiv stumbles through her words. “I mean, we were kids. It wasn’t like this. It wasn’t me.”

Her voice cracks at the end, and Karolina gently pulls Shiv into her, holding her tightly. She can imagine how confusing it must be, to go your whole life feeling some sort of distance from the violence, even if it was occasional. It’s not like Shiv has been spared any of Logan’s mind games, but even then, there’s a level of comfortability that she most likely reached in it. Whatever her normal was with Logan, he destroyed that.

“Have they just been carrying this with them their entire lives?” Shiv asks.

It’s a loaded question, one Shiv deserves an honest answer to. Karolina doesn’t like to believe it’s something she’s always carrying. It’s there, and it affects her in ways she wishes it didn’t, but she doesn’t think it has total control. She laughs, and she cries, and she still can’t stand the scent of Lucky Strike Reds without it making her skin itch a little, but she loves the scent of the Marlboros Shiv loves to pull out at the end of a long and drunken night at a Waystar event. It’s give and take, things come and go, but she’s still her, regardless of what she’s carrying and how much.

“Shiv, it all fucking sucks. Whether he’s spitting your name or spitting in your face,” Karolina says. She rubs a comforting thumb along Shiv’s arm. “Haven’t you already been carrying things your entire life, too?”

The question brings a discomfort to Shiv that she can Karolina immediately. It’s not normally her place to point out the flaws in Shiv’s upbringing, and it’s not a topic they’ve ever broached until tonight, but it needed to be pointed out. Shiv thinks this is the first time she’s suffered under Logan’s hand. Karolina would argue that Shiv doesn’t know what it’s like to not suffer under him.

“What do you think I should do?” Shiv asks, ignoring Karolina’s question. Karolina hates when Shiv does this, when she looks at Karolina like she has all the answers. Like whatever thing she’s about to say is an absolute that Shiv will let herself be ruled by, despite acting like she doesn’t ever really want anyone’s input at all. That’s where her responsibility lies, in being honest with Shiv. She thinks Shiv knows that, or at least, Karolina hopes she does.

“I think that wounds heal and scars fade,” Karolina says, piecing together her thoughts. “I think…that your father isn’t someone who’s going to change, but I think he might say that he’s sorry. It’s not a bad thing, if you’re willing to let it go. It’s not a bad thing if you can’t forget it, either.”

“I’m tired of being terrified of him,” Shiv whispers through a teary breath.

“I know,” Karolina says.

“If—if I walk away,” Shiv swallows, “What happens to this?”

This. Karolina’s not even sure she can define what this is in the current moment, but she can still recall her life without Shiv in it, and Karolina knows one thing is certain.

“Absolutely nothing will change.”

#tumblr user jeniffercheck posting a shivlina fic in the year 2024???#we lived to see the day #shivlina #shivlina fic #shiv x karolina #karolina novotney #shiv roy #succession fic #duskfalls

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idyllic-ghost · 2 years

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title: The Most Precious Thing pairing: nurse!jeonghan x surgeon!reader genre: hospital au, fluff, secret relationship warnings: medical talk (tumors, brain biopsy, potential cancer), mentions of food/not having time to eat, stress synopsis: you and jeondhan had been dating for a few months. since you worked at the same hospital, you decided to keep it a secret so as to not complicate things with your colleagues. however, during a moment of weakness, one of them figures you out. wordcount: 3.6k taglist: @enhacolor, @shuabby1994, @junhui-recs, @dkakapizzaboy, @just-here-to-read-01, @loviehan, @userjunhuii, @novalpha, @bubblymoon, @aaniag, @d0nghyuck, @fantasy2wonderland, @seunghancore, @woozixo, @niktwazny303, @lllucere, @uniq-tastic, @wonwoospartyhat, @stariightjoyy, @hyneyedfiz, @cali-snow, @pearlygraysky, @crazywittysassy, @yeosayang rating: PG 13

request: nurse!jeonghan x surgeon!reader with prompt 2 and 53 (requested by @tfmingyu) prompts: 2. "i like the way your hand fits in mine" 53. "do you believe in soulmates?"

a/n: after a very long time of keeping this request in my drafts, and after many major changes to the story - it's finally here! i'm sorry for taking so long!!

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"You have another appointment you need to look at, Doctor Y/L/N," Jeonghan said as you walked past, enunciating your title in a slightly mocking manner.

"Remind me of that later, nurse Yoon," you answered and doing the same to him. "I have a patient waiting for examination results."

Jeonghan took the file from your hands and looked at it while walking beside you. He let out a few hums and eventually gave it back to you. You looked at him with an arched brow, questioning if he really understood what it said.

"I understood about half of it." He nodded. "Checks out."

"The patient has a brain tumor." You sighed. "We need to do a brain biopsy... and I have to tell them, which is stressing me out."

The two of you walked into the elevator and you pressed the button for the third floor. Jeonghan wasn't sure why he had followed you, he technically had to be on the first floor at this moment. Today was luckily a slow day, a near impossible occurrence - but he was lucky. The doors closed, and the elevator quickly moved up.

"You're stressed about telling them and not doing the surgery?" He scoffed. "Every day you surprise me more."

The elevator dinged, signaling that you had arrived on the third floor. Before the doors could open, Jeonghan leaned down and placed a quick kiss on your cheek. You looked over at him with wide eyes, but you had no time to scold him for kissing you at work - the doors were already open.

"Good luck with that patient!" he said in a sing-song voice.

"You're not coming with me?" you asked as you walked outside the elevator, trying to act normal.

"Oh no, I have to be at reception." He gave you a Cheshire-cat grin as the doors closed.

Another sigh escaped your lips, but you couldn't help but smile. He was always risky, even if you tried to convince him to not be suspicious while at work. The two of you had started dating a few months ago. Meeting at a hospital doesn't seem very romantic, but Jeonghan was surprisingly good at making any situation into a sweet one. You had told him to keep things secret, while he didn't care either way. His carefree look on life did get on your nerves at times, but you looked past it for how good he was to you otherwise. Like now. He could see your stress from a mile away and went with you as far as he could go to try to cheer you up. It was cute. He was cute.

After telling your patient the news and explaining what you would need to do, they obviously freaked out a bit. They hadn't come in expecting a brain tumor, and now you were telling them that you had to make a small insition in their skull and take a sample of the said tumor to see if it was cancerous. Like any surgery, it didn't come without any risks, and you of course had to tell them that. After being a bit sympathetic you left, a tension headache already starting to affect you. As you walked through the corridor you started feeling a bit dizzy and stumbled to the wall to hold yourself up.

"Y/L/N?" a familiar voice said.

A pair of strong hands held you up. When you looked beside you a colleague of yours stood beside you. Choi Seungcheol, you were in the same undergrad class but ended up specializing in different areas. You in general surgery, and him in oncology. It was mere chance that you had ended up working at the same hospital. When you told your friends, they dreamily answered that it must be fate - to which you responded with that the cute doctor was involved with someone else, much to their dismay.

"Oh, Choi I actually need to speak with you..." You breathed out. "I just need to sit down for a bit..."

"Let's focus on you first. Have you had time to eat anything today?" he asked as he led you to the elevator.

"I'm fine... listen, I'm about to do a brain biopsy," you explained weakly as you watched him push the button for the first floor, "I'm pretty sure it's a cancerous tumor, it makes sense with the patient's other symptoms. I just want your opinion on something-"

"Y/L/N, did you eat today?" he asked again, ignoring what you were saying.

He was still holding you up, which you were incredibly thankful for because your legs felt like they were about to give out. With your right hand, you steadied yourself against the railing in the elevator which let him loosen his grip on you.

"I ate around ten AM.", you said, "I've been working since, I didn't have time to get lunch."

It was only a little bit of a lie since you wouldn't qualify the thing you ate as your meal. It wasn't enough to keep you satisfied for the rest of the day, and therefore, not sufficient. What dr. Choi didn't know, he couldn't criticize you for.

"Then we'll get you something to eat," Choi put simply, "After that, I'll give you my opinion on your case."

The elevator doors opened, and the two of you walked out. Dr. Choi sat you down on one of the waiting chairs and went over to the vending machine. You watched as he fed the machine some cash and pushed on some buttons, bending down to pick up the item as it fell down the machine. Soon enough, the doctor came back to you with a energy bar.

"Just to get your blood sugar up," he said and handed it to you.

"Y/N?" From a distance, you could see that Jeonghan was running up to you.

You cringed at his usage of your first name. It wasn't professional, which is why you wanted to avoid it. The man beside you raised his brows at the use of your first name. Clearly it surprised Doctor Choi a bit which only made you feel worse. Jeonghan finally arrived at your side, his eyes full of worry at the sight of your slumped form.

"Are you alright? You look sick," he crouched down in front of you.

"They just need to eat a bit," Choi chimed in. "Then they'll be just fine."

"You haven't been eating?" Jeonghan ignored the fact that your colleague just said you'll be fine.

"I didn't have the time, nurse Yoon," you said sternly. "I'll be fine, it's not a big deal."

"Not a big deal? You should give yourself time to eat." He sighed.

"Well, thank you for your medical advice," you said sarcastically. "But as I said, I didn't have the time. I have patients that need my help."

"I'm going to give you two some space..." Seungcheol interrupted. "Come over to my office when you can Y/N, I'll look over the case."

You were about to stop him from leaving, but Jeonghan grabbing your hands distracted you. You looked over at him, forgetting that you still had to consult dr. Choi on a myriad of things. Jeonghan had a serious look on his face as he sat down beside you.

"Why don't you have time to eat?" he asked. "You should at least be able to eat some sort of energy bar while in between places."

"I didn't have anything on me." You sighed and rested your head against your palm. "I'm sorry for being angry... you didn't do anything wrong."

"I know that, sweetheart." He chuckled and threw an arm around your shoulders. "When does your shift end? Do you think you can get off early if it's for health reasons?"

"I just need to eat a bit, Jeonghan, I'm not sick." You looked up at him with a thankful gaze.

"Oh, I know..." He smiled. "But nobody else does."

"I'm not going to lie to anyone!" You laughed, a sense of relief flooding your systems at how carefree you could be around him.

Usually, you would've told him to keep his hands to himself, but it felt so nice to have him take care of you. So damn it all, you thought as you leaned your head on his shoulder. For once you let your walls down at work, and you just hoped nobody would see.

"Come to me when you're done for the day," he said. "We can go get take out and I can stay the night at your place to make sure that you'll actually get to sleep."

"That sounds nice." You nodded and sat up. "Now I need to talk to Dr. Choi about my patient, though."

"Go get some better food at the cafeteria first." Jeonghan grabbed your hand before you could walk away. "Just a sandwich and some water, it doesn't have to be anything big."

You nodded and stayed there in front of him. He was smiling brightly up at you, and you just couldn't walk away - mostly because he was still holding your hand. You tried to discreetly signal for him to let go of your hand, but he didn't get it. He didn't get it, or he was pretending to be oblivious. As much as you loved him, he could be infuriating at times.

"Jeonghan," you whispered. "Why are you still holding my hand?"

"Because I like the way your hand fits in mine," he teased. "What? You want me to let go?"

All you did was let out yet another sigh, but Jeonghan gave in and let go of your hand anyway. He liked to tease you, but he wasn't about to start driving you insane when you're this stressed out. No, that would be saved for occasions where he would actually enjoy watching you get flustered. You said goodbye and were on your merry way to the cafeteria, unaware of how your boyfriend's gaze lingered on you until you were out of sight.

By the time your shift ended you felt like your legs were about to give out from under you. However, when you made your way to the reception all of the stress washed off your body, like taking a cold shower after a hot workout, as soon as you saw Jeonghan. He smiled at you, and you nodded to him.

You walked out alone and sat down in the passenger seat of Jeonghan's car. Luckily, you had taken the bus today, which meant that Jeonghan could drive you home. A few minutes passed, and he joined you in the driver's seat.

"What do you want to eat?" he asked as he put on his seat belt and started the car.

"I'll go for anything right now, just let me put some greasy food in my mouth." You groaned dramatically.

"Coming right up," Jeonghan chuckled.

The couch felt so unbelievably soft. Never had you considered your very own couch to be this great of a buy, but considering how comfortable you were right now it might be the best thing you had ever bought in your entire life. All of the credit couldn't go to the couch, of course, because some of it also had to go to Jeonghan. You were snuggled up on his chest, your legs laying in between his, and his arms wrapped around you. A warm blanket was laying over the two of you. On the coffee table stood two boxes of empty Chinese take-out, the closest thing you could find to the hospital.

"You're not falling asleep on me, are you?" Jeonghan muttered, despite him also being half asleep.

"I think I might be." You shifted so that you could meet his gaze. "Weren't you going to make sure I got a good night's sleep?"

"I don't think this is the optimal place for sleeping," he retorted with a smile.

"Well, I think it is." You put your forehead against his chest. "You're such a good pillow, baby, don't worry."

"Come on, angel, let's get you to bed." Jeonghan chuckled and helped you sit up.

He walked with you to the bathroom, where you brushed your teeth together. There were two toothbrushes in your restroom: one was yours, and the spare one was for Jeonghan whenever he would come over. It was always a nice reminder for you when he wasn't there because it was the story behind the toothbrush that made it so special.

It was about the fifth time that Jeonghan had stayed over, and he had forgotten his toothbrush, which was an honest mistake but still very annoying. You didn't have any extra toothbrushes at home, so the two of you had to go to the nearest store and buy some. Earlier that week, your car had broken down and it was raining heavily outside without any sign of stopping. Both of you were determined to get that toothbrush so, while holding the hoods of your jackets over your head, you ran through the rain all the way to the store. When you got home, with a toothbrush and some extra toothpaste in a plastic bag, you couldn't help but burst out laughing. With anyone else, this occurrence would infuriate you because how can someone forget a toothbrush? However, it wasn't just some person, it was Jeonghan, and it made you realize that you'd do anything with him.

"What are you looking at?", Jeonghan managed to get out, despite the toothpaste in his mouth.

You hadn't realized that you had been staring at him through the mirror. He wore a sly grin on his lips, as he always did when he caught you doing something that he could use to potentially fluster you. You just shook your head with a small smile and kept on brushing your teeth. When you turned your attention to your reflection in the mirror, Jeonghan spat out the toothpaste he had in the sink and washed his toothbrush. His arms snuck around your waist and he peppered a bunch of kisses on your cheek.

"You have toothpaste on your mouth! Stop!" you shrieked, followed by a laugh.

"Tell me why you were staring at me!" He grinned.

"It was nothing!" you whined, but he only started attacking your neck instead. "Stop it! You're getting toothpaste all over me..."

He stopped, leaning his temple against yours as he met your eyes through the mirror. You washed your toothbrush and wiped off the toothpaste he had gotten all over you, then wiped off the toothpaste from the corners of Jeonghan's mouth.

"I hate you," you grumbled.

"I love you too." He grinned.

The two of you waddled out of the bathroom, turning off the lights as you left, Jeonghan still holding onto you. It had started raining outside, like the day you had gotten drenched in search of a toothbrush. As you got into bed, Jeonghan crawling in beside you, you kept thinking about that day. It all crashed down upon you, a sort of enlightenment, as he looked lovingly at you.

"Do you believe in soulmates?" you asked softly.

"I don't know." He said as he brought you closer into his arms. "I guess I've never thought about it."

The rain kept on falling outside, creating a melodic sound against the rooftop and your windows. You put your head on his chest to avoid eye contact. It was all too embarrassing to act like this. Not that Jeonghan made you feel like you couldn't, he was an affectionate guy, but you just weren't the type to act like that. Never had you been the type to say it first, but there had to be a first time for everything.

"Because I kind of think..." you muttered, "I kind of think I might've found one."

"A soulmate?"

"Mhm..."

"Who?"

You went quiet. It was a hard thing to say. Now you wished you hadn't said anything, to begin with. If you hadn't, you would've been asleep by now.

"You," you finally whispered out, barely audible.

Now it was Jeonghan's turn to be quiet. Your entire body ached with anticipation, and you wish he would just say something to break the tension already. He didn't. He pulled you even closer to him, so impossibly close.

"A nurse and a surgeon being soulmates..." he muttered. "It definitely sounds like a cliché... I'm down for it."

It wasn't quite what you had meant, but Jeonghan knew that. He knew you wouldn't be able to say what you actually wanted to, that you would try to say it metaphorically just in case he didn't feel the same, and that you wanted him to play along. Of course, he wouldn't do that. He wanted to hear it from your lips, if you were comfortable enough around him you would.

"That's not...", you sighed because you knew that he knew, "I love you, Jeonghan."

His hands went to the back of your head, gently patting it. His lips met your forehead to place a kiss there, and you felt him smiling.

"I love you too, Y/N.", he said.

The next morning you woke up with no one beside you. Your alarm clock had woken you up, but the sunrise shining through the windows did the trick too. You were in a complete daze as you walked out to your kitchen to make your breakfast before you had to storm off to work.

"Good morning, pretty," a smooth voice echoed through your head, and you almost thought that you were still dreaming.

"You got out of bed before me?" you said as you rubbed your eyes.

"Yeah." He brought you a sandwich and forced it into your hands. "I made you breakfast, and I prepared you a lunch."

There was a box laying on the counter and a water bottle standing beside it. You looked between the lunchbox and your boyfriend, and you felt yourself start to tear up. Maybe it was because you were still tired, or maybe it was just because you didn't expect the sweet action. You wrapped your arms around Jeonghans middle and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you," you said.

"You can thank me by eating it later today. When is the biopsy scheduled for?" he asked.

"It's right before lunch." You pulled away from him and pretended to rub your eyes again to dry away any tears that might be there.

"Eat it right after the biopsy then," he said. "Now, let's hurry up. We have to go get ready."

Quick footsteps made their way through the corridor. You were in a hurry to see Doctor Choi. He had looked over your notes last week, but now you actually had results he could look over. You didn't want to screw this up, this month had already been hell and if you could just get one thing perfectly done you'd feel satisfied.

"Hope I'm not interrupting anything," you said as you walked into his office and put your papers on his desk. "Could you take a look at these for me?"

Seungcheol picked up the papers and looked through them, reading them thoroughly. His eyebrows were furrowed in concentration, but his expression made you nervous. You had a bad habit of always biting your nails when you got nervous.

"It looks good, I think it's like you said before." He nodded and looked up to you with a comforting smile. "Biopsy went well?"

"It was just fine..." You sighed.

"Do you want to have a seat?" he asked and motioned for the chair in front of his desk.

"Actually, yeah I would love that." You sat down and immediately slumped over ever so slightly. "I've been running around all over the place, my legs are tired."

Dr. Choi nodded as he looked through a few papers. He was very clearly just trying to find something to keep himself busy with, to stall something he actually wanted to bring up.

"So..." He suddenly had a curious smile on his lips. "You're dating a nurse?"

"What?" You almost jumped out of your seat.

"Yoon Jeonghan, no?" He grinned.

"Did he tell you? I swear to god, I will-"

"He didn't," Choi interrupted. "I just guessed. Thanks for confirming it."

Your eyes shut tight as you leaned your head back and groaned. The secret was bound to be revealed at some point, but you didn't want it to happen just yet. Being surrounded by a bunch of smart doctors wasn't optimal for keeping things hidden.

"You're cute together," he commented. "He clearly cares a lot for you... although you should definitely tell him to lay off while at work if you're trying to be inconspicuous."

"I've tried." A laugh escaped your lips.

There was a pause, a moment of complete silence between you. Seungcheol seemed to be inspecting you in some way, at least it seemed like it when it felt like his eyes were staring into your soul.

"Take care of him well, Dr. Y/L/N," he said and stood up. "I wouldn't be able to see him go through another heartbreak."

"You're friends?" Your eyebrows shot up. "And neither of you told me?"

"It wasn't neccessary, but now that I finally know you're together I think you should know," he said with a still friendly smile. "As I said, he clearly cares about you if he was willing to keep this from me. So please... don't hurt him."

There was something in his eyes that made you curious. He knew something about Jeonghan's past that you didn't. You weren't exactly planning on breaking Jeonghan's heart, so it didn't really matter - but seeing how deeply Seungcheol cared really made you want to know.

"I won't." You nodded.

"Thank you, I'm sure you won't... I just like to be safe, I guess." He motioned for the door to his office. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to do some work."

"Oh, of course." You got up and walked over to the door. "You won't... tell anyone, will you?"

"Of course not, Y/N." He gave you one last smile before you closed the door behind you.

Your brain raked with many ideas of what could have happened in the past. Clearly, it was a bad relationship but you were curious as to what exactly happened. As if on cue, Jeonghan walked around the corner.

"Doctor Y/N!" He smiled brightly before looking around himself.

"Nurse Yoon," you greeted with a small giggle as you watched him try to see if the coast was clear.

"I made you a lunch this morning." He handed you a brown paper bag. "You haven't already eaten, have you?"

"I haven't." You grinned and accepted his bag, "Thank you."

It had become a normal thing for him to make you lunches, and you weren't complaining. They were just simple sandwiches for the most part, but it was still special to you.

"Could I... get a kiss as a payment for being such a good boyfriend?" he asked with a sly smile.

"And here I was, thinking you were making me food out of the kindness in your heart." You jokingly put a hand over your chest to fake being offended.

He didn't have much time to respond, since you pressed a quick kiss to his lips. His eyes looked love-drunk when you pulled away. You were starting to understand why Doctor Choi was being careful. Jeonghan was probably the most precious person you had ever met. He may be a trickster, a mischievous little devil, but once you peeled away that layer there was nothing but tenderness in his actions. Everything he did, he did delicately and with a warm heart. Perhaps that's why he made such a good nurse. You smiled at the thought, and Jeonghan's eyebrows knitted together.

"You're staring at me like that again," he muttered. "I wish I could look inside your brain."

"Oh trust me, that's my job - you don't want to do that," you joked, successfully making Jeonghan chuckle.

"I'll see you tonight?" He smiled as he slowly started walking away, his back turned against the way he was walking.

"Of course," you said. "I wouldn't dream of missing it."

His smile widened, finally turning away and walking to wherever he needed to be. You watched him leave, not having the strength to look away.

#jeonghan #yoon jeonghan #seventeenweeklyarticle #seventeenweeklynet #seventeen #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction #kpop #fanfic #kpop writer #svt #seventeen fluff #svt fluff #jeonghan x y/n #jeonghan x you #jeonghan drabbles #jeonghan x reader

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bladerbunny · 9 days

Text

A Moment With Kai

Summary: Cuddling and cute talk with Kai Pairing: Kai Hiwatari x Reader Warnings: None Wordcount: 846 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You stood out from the crowd because unlike all the others, you had no interest in him. The fans screaming his name, the girls coming up and twirling their hair and giggling as they ask for an autograph, the occasional awkward stalking and obsessive following as he went from city to city. You were never a part of any of that. It was just you and your book behind the service counter of that small cafe that he quietly slipped into one afternoon to avoid yet another crowd of fans that spotted him on the street and had been hunting him down for three blocks to talk to him about his latest bey battle when all he wanted was 5 minutes to gather his thoughts.

“Can I help you?” You had asked, looking up from the page you had been reading. The smile was all it took to have him sit down, order a large black coffee, and spend the rest of the afternoon listening to you ramble on and on about the series you were reading, how lame your bookclub was when it came to selecting something everyone would like, your 2 cats and their silly antics, what your favorite tea was, and how you just couldn’t understand the plot of this one gangster film from the 1940s that your best friend insists was a cinematic masterpiece. Kai didn’t want to leave that moment, or you for that matter.

So here the two of you were, nearly two years later in one another's arms as you celebrate a successful anniversary, having gone out to dinner with a few friends followed by a quiet night together at home to end it.

“I’m really happy that Tyson and Hilary are finally together.” You hum, absentmindedly tracing circles along Kai’s chest as you lay in bed together. “It's really nice to have another couple to go out with on double dates now!” you add excitedly.

Kai snorts.“You mean you actually enjoy spending time with Tyson?” He asks, glancing down at you.”He doesn’t annoy you or anything?”

“No, not at all.” You smile, shaking your head slightly as you prop yourself up slightly to look at him. “I like all of your friends! They are always so nice and welcoming to me, especially Tyson.” You laugh, noticing Kai’s slight grimace.”You should really appreciate it more, you know. You have great friends Kai.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He grumbles, tightening his grip on you slightly. “When they aren’t being annoying or trying to tease me or bothering me in every free moment of peace I have.” He sighs.

You lean forward, planting a small kiss on the tip of his nose. “I think you just need to lighten up a bit.” You tease, nuzzling your nose into his softly.

Kai rolls his eyes, scooting away from you slightly. “That’s just your opinion.” he grumbles, face becoming slightly flushed.

“Oh please,” You giggle, kissing the tip of his nose once more. “You are just mad because I am right and you know it.”

“Whatever you say, babe.” Kai sighs in defeat, pulling you closer. “You know you really shouldn’t kiss me too much. You will end up spoiling me.”

“You are already spoiled.” You hum, kissing him a third time.

"Well, you're the one doing the spoiling…" He replies, a small smirk appearing on his lips as he continues."You're too affectionate, you know that?"

"Are you saying you don't like my kisses?" you pull back, pretending to be offended at his remark. “How dare you! I give those to you in good faith, Mister Hiwatari.”

"I'm not saying that I don't like your kisses. But maybe there is such a thing as too much for a guy like me?”

“So what you are saying is you never want me to kiss you again?” She huffs, rolling over as she crosses her arms. “Okay, got it!”

“Oh stop being so childish.” Kai rolls his eyes, trying to pull you back into his arms but you don’t budge. “Fine! I'll take it back.” He sighs, too tired to play. "Alright, fine, I'll let you kiss me as much as you want then. Just please come back over here so we can get to slee-OOF!”

Kai is cut off by you immediately pouncing back onto him. “That’s better!” You giggle, peppering him with kisses all over his cheeks. “I knew you would let me win. I always do.”

He can’t help but become flustered and grunt as you bounce on him. “Yeah, yeah.” He growls, taking every kiss you give him without complaint. “And you say I am the spoiled one.”

You sigh, resting your head on his chest once more.“I never said I wasn’t spoiled too.” You laugh, planting one more small kiss on his cheek before settling into his arms. “I love you.” You whisper quietly, smiling to yourself as you feel him settle.

“I love you too.” Kai sighs, pressing his lips to your forehead gently.

#kai hiwatari x reader #kai x reader #kai hiwatari #kai beyblade #beyblade fanfic #beyblade

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yoditorian · 24 days

Text

Lacuna - The Rewrite - Part 2

din/gn!reader

i split the original chapter into two upon rewriting, which is why the second half is missing

original part 2//series masterlist//main masterlist

word count: 3.1k // warnings: some swears, too many italics, that's literally it tho, still 18+ no babies

“-wiped out, no one survived.”

“Well, someone did.”

They’re arguing, still. And you’ve been delivered five meals since being directed into the small office for questioning. So it’s been at least a day, almost two. Probably. The voices in the hall fade, they must be off to discuss your situation with someone who might be able to make the decision. They’ve already searched you and your pack - already confirmed you’re not a spy for the Empire - so what’s the hold up?

You don’t hear a set of footsteps approaching the door, too wrapped up in your own anxieties about what might happen if they don’t let you in. Which is probably why you jump half a foot in your chair when the door slides open. It reveals a woman, dark hair and sharp features, deep green flight suit tied at her waist. She’s pretty, although she’s clearly not sure what to make of you just yet as she eyes the binders at your wrists.

“What do you do?” She asks, arms folded as she leans against the doorframe. You don’t answer straight away, not sure if it might be some kind of test, but at least she doesn’t look overly annoyed that she has to repeat her question to get an answer.

“Pilot, mechanic, fucking janitor - whatever, honestly.”

“Triple threat,” Her voice is even, but she’s fighting a smile that gives her away immediately. Not a test, then. “What kind of experience you got?”

Shara has to admit that the rumours of a surviving member of the Corellian spy ring had piqued her interest. Jet fuel runs in the blood there, it’s a safe bet that whoever the generals had spent the better part of forty eight hours grilling has more than enough experience to hop straight into a starfighter. And with heavy losses in recent months, pilots are something the Rebellion is desperately short on.

So she isn’t shocked when you start listing every planetside transport, every planet hopper, cargo freighter, gunship, and starfighter you’ve ever worked on or flown. The list is extensive, impressive honestly. It dwarfs the experience of many of her colleagues, and Shara can’t help the thrum of excitement in her veins. Not only are you an experienced pilot, but you’re a mechanic - a scrapper, the rebels need more scrappers. Too many politicians, too many people who are far too used to having every resource in the galaxy at their disposal. It’s a glimmer of hope, she realises, in a night becoming all too dark for anyone’s liking.

“So, you can fly anything?” Shara asks, no longer hiding the wide grin on her face.

“Anything.”

You’ll fit right in, she decides - there and then.

And you do, you slot in like you’ve lived your whole life orbiting Yavin.

They drill you like there’s no tomorrow, you’ve got the deep muscle aches to prove it but it’s thrilling. Your back hurts and it’s everything you ever wanted it to be. Where the Corellian spy ring was all sneaking and secrets, the Rebel base on Yavin IV is a full scale production. Every daylight hour is spent running the same manoeuvres in the main four fighters - before you know it, you could fly any one of them with your eyes closed. Despite the pain and the exhaustion and the repetitive nature of the training, you love it. But you’ve got your eyes on the prize.

A coveted position in one of the primary starfighter squadrons has conveniently opened up, its previous placeholder reassigned, and you’re not the only one who’s sure that the fourth bunk in Green Squadron’s barracks has your name on it.

“I know I don’t see you coming for my track time.” Shara Bey’s voice is loud and clear over the buzz of the hangar, and you can’t keep the smile off your face despite the ache deep in your bones.

“Maybe I am, are you finally gonna do something about it?”

Shara launches herself at you the moment you set your datapad down, a boisterous laugh echoing off the ships. You’re steadily climbing the ranks in training, the years of experience already under your belt make you more confident in the cockpit than the other new recruits and you’re not afraid to pull a stunt or two. A flawless dead drop recovery had earned more than a few nods of approval from some of the qualified pilots. Although the Commander overseeing the recruit training made it clear that it was definitely what landed you with patrol maintenance duty on top of your usual drills in the first place.

“I talked to Draven.” She says, and your stomach flips. You’re leaps and bounds ahead of the other recruits, for sure, but nobody seems to want to sign off on your training. There’s always something about required hours or simulation times or more drills. You’re starting to get the feeling that, while you’ve got enough support from your would-be colleagues, no one in command wants you in the air at all.

“I told you I would!”

“I know, I know. But look, if I ask it’s more like an endorsement.”

“Shara-” You’re talking over one another, but not missing a single word. It’s a talent that leaves the commanding officers astounded more often than not.

“He said he’d think about it, which in command language means no-”

“Tell me there’s a but.”

“But,” She grins widely, “He told me if you get this next info grab done, he’ll put in a good word with my commanders. And my commanders know I’m not going in the air unless you’re at my nine o’clock.”

Shara’s been far more welcoming than just about everyone since the moment she’d rocked up to your interrogation room and asked about your experience. And, over the moon to find you wandering around the halls and out of the binders, she’d spent the whole of your first night curled up in your bunk in the recruit barracks - recounting every little bit of drama she could think of. By the morning, you know who was dating who, who wasn’t happy about it, which crews were rivals, and which held the fastest course runs. Hers, obviously .

You weren’t as forthcoming with your own journey, only mentioning that you’d run with some rebels for a while on your home planet, made a few detours along the way - she didn’t seem too surprised, and you wondered how much of that she knew already. Ran’s voice, still, in the back of your mind reminding you that everybody has an agenda . But her eyes were so open, so kind, you’ve yet to see that slip. Shara Bey might be the first genuinely good person you’ve ever met.

“And Kes’s crew is due to swing by tomorrow, in case you’ve changed your mind.” She winks, although she already knows you well enough to know you won’t take her up on the offer.

It had come up that first night, somewhere along the way, when she’d started lamenting about the pitiful state of the dating pool. Not something she had to worry about anymore, thank God, but a nightmare nowadays if you were after anyone who didn’t have history with someone in their own crew. She was happy to get her boyfriend to set you up with one of his friends - Pathfinders, never on base long enough to establish a history with anyone, fine enough to pass the time, and strong enough to manhandle you a little. If that’s what you’re into.

You’d still been a little wary of sharing too many details about your history, something about how you weren’t interested muttered in the dark over the quiet breathing of the other new recruits. You could only tell her that you didn’t expect to see him again. He’d gone home, you didn’t even know where home was. She’d understood, with an arm around your shoulders and an attentive ear if you ever wanted to share more, although she made it clear that the offer of a muscular pair of emotionally unattached Pathfinder arms was always open.

It’s close to a year since you got scooped up by their spies for asking about the Rebellion, but Shara’s never failed to make it seem like much longer. Like you’ve been best friends, sharing lunches and secrets on the landing pad in the shade of her A-Wing for your whole lives. Even now, she’s looking at you like she knows you - backwards, forwards, sideways, inside out. Truth be told, she kind of does. It’s a closeness you’re sure you’ve never had with anyone, and you know you wouldn’t give it up for anything.

“Someone came here last week having never left his planet before and they put him on the training roster. You’ve logged more flight time than any recruit I’ve ever seen and we didn’t even have to teach you in the first place. I know you’re Draven’s golden child, but he can’t keep you on the ground forever, kid.”

“You can’t call me ‘kid’, I’m older than you.” You laugh, shoving her shoulder with your own.

“You’re ruining the moment.” She winks, pressing a kiss to your temple before she waves at a commander calling her name and makes her way to her ship.

The datapad beeps a reminder from its resting place on your tool trolley, you need to pack for your intel grab. It shouldn’t be a long trip, Draven had assured you, a simple in and out: information in exchange for protection and transport to the base. Protection and transport optional. He makes the hard decisions, you’ve learned during your time running the smaller missions for intelligence. The more important runs get given to rebels like Cassian Andor and the group of mercs you’d seen filing into the command room a few days ago. It was an odd combination, seeing people like that somewhere like this, and you know you shouldn’t have stared but you couldn’t help yourself. Weapons strapped to every empty space on each body, armour and clothes on a number of species from all across the galaxy. One of them had looked jarringly like you, although you hadn’t really gotten a good look at their face before they’d disappeared.

Just this mission, and you’d be in the air next week. Hopefully. It’s enough to get your feet moving towards the barracks to pack.

You only need the basics, a change of clothes and some medkit refills. Just in case. Except there’s still an empty space when you zip it shut, sitting heavy between your neatly folded shirts and the top of the bag, and you keep looking at your blanket. It gets cold in hyperspace, a voice in the back of your mind pipes up, and you decide that’s good enough reason as any to fold it in alongside your supplies. It smells solidly of the clean soap of your bedsheets, his scent - Din’s scent, a mix of metal and warmth - had faded before you even plucked up the courage to go looking for the Rebellion, all those months ago. You still hold it to your nose for a moment, just to check, before it too gets folded and laid in the top of your pack.

Now you’re ready.

Din isn’t overly fond of Nevarro. It’s not an unbearable heat, the dry plains are to thank for that, but he’s not a fan of days where the wind picks up and carries the sulphur of the lava fields under the lip of his helmet. The covert welcomed him back, more or less with open arms - though he’s not sure if their ever-dwindling numbers might have had anything to do with the warm reception. He hadn’t let them go without a cut of his pay for every job he’d done for Ran, always sending something back to the foundlings, so at least he hadn’t totally abandoned them. The Armourer decided he should be their beroya , their bounty hunter, and within days he found himself tracking a quarry in a system he’d never heard of. It was easy, really, to take the skills he’d garnered all his life and apply them to this. Paz had laughed with the familiarity of an old friend and told him that if a skinny thing like Din was their beroya , they were all fucked. So at least no one was openly angry that he’d left them.

The guild rep slides a puck across the table, metal scraping against the stone, and the blue hologram flickers. The human man staring back at him is unassuming, but the notes suggest otherwise. A former senator’s assistant, with strong connections to both the Empire and the Rebellion. Din nods, flicking the puck off and tucking it into his pocket without another word.

His loyalty is to the covert, to the Mandalorians. It always has been and it always will be. This is the way. But one mention of the Rebellion has his mind surging back to thoughts of you. Everything in his life seems to. Every time he sets foot on the Crest all he can see is you, bent double with your head in an access panel and a greasy rag tucked into the back of your pants. He’d see the sun and remember how you always used to turn your face to it, just for a moment, whenever the team ran jobs planetside. You’d never told him where you came from, but Ran had let bits and pieces slip over the years. In the looming shadow of the Razor Crest, Din wonders if you ever made it off the station. If you decided to drop everything and find the rebellion, the way you said you would when you were half asleep on his chest, your mind fucked out and hazy. He hopes you did.

The tracking fob brings him to a semi populated planet, somewhere near the border of the Unknown Regions. Vast swathes of land and water are completely uncolonised, left to nature, only a few cities dotted here and there over the whole planet. The bounty is evidently in possession of some brains, having chosen a mid-sized city to get lost in, and Din is almost disappointed that he knows it won’t take long. Wishes he’d picked a different puck, a little further away. Just to keep his mind occupied and out of more dangerous territories.

He stays vigilant, but pays no mind to the beeping of the fob on his belt. He can steal a moment, he thinks, to take in the area. To live the life of some extravagant explorer in his mind while he does a little recon, the life he might have led before it was cruelly snatched away in seconds on Aq Vetina. The last thing he expects to see when he walks into that crumbling little cantina is you.

Din spins on his heel and is out of the door almost as soon as he enters, slipping down the alley to the side of the building to catch his breath. He’s fairly sure you don’t notice - but his mind is reeling, echoes of the vows he swore as a child and the Armourer’s words swirl in his ears.

His loyalty is to the covert. His loyalty is to the covert. His loyalty is to the covert.

But he only sees you. The way you always had time for him back on the station, how you told the others where they could shove it but always gave him a smile. You went above and beyond to help him without complaint when he asked, only ever got snippy with him when someone else had pissed you off first. He still remembers the way you felt in his hands, how you sounded, how you tasted. He still thinks about it on quiet nights, more often than he should. This is not the place to remember, there’ll be time for that later, although his body needs another minute to be completely convinced.

All he feels is guilt, once the blood comes back up to his brain. Guilt over the covert, over his vows and his creed and his people. But what’s more convincing is the guilt he has over you. Over how he just walked away, left you sleeping, and took the ship you’d spent months working on. Even if you were the one who told him to take it. You’re beautiful, still. Of course you are, you always have been to him.

You notice when he walks in this time.

The sunlight streaming in from a window catches on the glass of his visor and your heart jumps into your throat. You don’t know if he’s spotted you yet, as he takes a seat at a table by the door angled away from you. Logically, you’d say it could be any Mandalorian. But you spent countless hours studying the way he moves, you had to know his gait to know if walking around a corner would get you killed or not. It almost had on more than one occasion. You could recognise his footsteps anywhere.

The untrained eye would think him relaxed, as relaxed as a man in head to toe armour can be, but you know better. There’s a tension in his shoulders, the same he used to get when Xi’an made another move on him with that grating giggle or Qin handled a blaster too roughly. His hand sits on his thigh, fingers splayed, ready to find the smooth contours of his blaster at any moment. Ever the soldier, never quite at ease. Apart from the last time you thought you’d ever see him, it seemed.

He leaves before you’re even done with your drink, sitting there for barely five minutes when he throws a couple of credits on the table for a drink he didn’t buy and stalks out. You sigh and down the rest of your drink, hoping it’ll quell the nausea rising in your stomach. It doesn’t, but you follow him out all the same.

You’re sure you were right behind him, weaving through the slowly emptying streets as the sun sets and the chill of the night begins to settle in, but now he’s nowhere to be found. Until you feel a set of eyes land heavily on your shoulders. You turn, slowly, and catch a glimpse of where he ducked into a narrow alley. The city’s full of them, but you’re certain he hadn’t been there when you passed it.

A long moment passes when you’re swallowed by the shadow of the buildings towering either side of you, a moment where he just watches you. You can’t deny you’re watching him too, carefully surveying his armour for new nicks and scrapes. There’s more than you’d like to admit to caring about.

“What are you doing here?” He breaks the silence, the tension, first. You shrug.

“Working, what are you doing here?”

Din holds a small round disk in his palm, arm stretching out towards you as the holo flickers to life and you’re faced with your contact for the intel drop.

“Working.”

Fuck.

And that’s when a really, really bad idea starts to take shape.

i don't have access to my old taglist forms anymore so feel free to message or drop me an ask if you want to be tagged in future :)

#summary is i love shara bey and i want to be her best friend end of chapter #lacuna #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian x you #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #star wars fic #the mandalorian fic #liz does words

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