#and now we're policing content | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys · 7 months

Text

Clownfall: Endgame

I am calling it that in the full knowledge that batshit things may yet happen, but listen. Listen. We have a year left before the general election. I am hedging my bets and assuming all that comes in that year will be Tory manoeuvring ahead of that. Let's all hope for a nice quiet year in which everything can fall neatly under that banner, that won't ruin this naming convention.

Previous Reading

Important Terminology - Required Reading

What is a Whip?

How do Whips work?

Shadow Cabinet

Front Benchers, Back Benchers and the Cabinet

What do we need to call an early General Election?

The Adventures of Big Dog the Clown - Suggested Reading

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

Elanor’s Guide to Liz Truss - Suggested Reading

Character-based prequel

The Premiership of Liz Truss

The Next Steps - Suggested Reading

The post-Truss contenders

Bye Matt

BoJo Resigns as MP

Alright, that's probably everything. Just nice to have it all in one place, innit? If you would like a nice soothing soundtrack to your reading, here's my recommendation. On with the show!

Clownfall: Endgame

Wednesday

So, let's start with charismatic and charming Home Secretary Suella Braverman! You may remember her from such hits as "Quitting before she could be fired after breaking the law only to be rehired by Sunak almost immediately and without consequence to appease the right wing nutjobs in the party", and "Claiming Pakistani men have a culture that makes them work in abuse rings to target vulnerable white English girls" (I should add that, if you are unfamiliar with Suella Braverman, regardless of what that quote implies, she is not, in fact, white); recently she made the news because she announced that being homeless is a "lifestyle choice". So true, Suella! They could give it up any time they wanted. They could, for example, get together and break in and steal your fucking house.

But in particular, here we're focussing on her recent stance towards the multiple huge pro-Palestine marches that have been taking place in London. So far she has indicated that she wants people who wave Palestinian flags to be arrested, so that's very measured and rational of her; but, last Wednesday (Nov 8th), she decided to write a lil opinion piece in the Times all about how mean and biased and liberal the police are. This is an absolutely fascinating assertion to I suspect literally anyone who has ever been involved with the police. But no! Quoth Suella, aggressive right-wing protesters are "rightly met with a stern response", while "pro-Palestinian mobs" are "largely ignored".

And, she claims, the march on Saturday isn’t simply a cry for help for Gaza, but an "assertion of primacy by certain groups - particularly Islamists - of the kind we are more used to seeing in Northern Ireland".

Imagine how well all that went down.

Thursday

You are underestimating how that went down, because it emerges that Suella deVille did not, in fact, get any form of validated sign-off or permission from Number 10 before squirting her ill-informed liquid horseshit all over the front desk of the Times news room, and that, Tumblrs, you'll be surprised to learn, is actually quite an important and compulsory part of criticising the police when you are the Home Secretary. Like, there is a Ministerial Code about this. It is very clear. It is in Article 8.2, Tumblrs. Thou Shalt Have Permission From Number 10 Before Making Media Interventions.

“The content was not agreed with Number 10,” a spokesperson for Prime Minister Rishi Sunak told reporters, referring to the prime minister’s Downing Street office. The ministerial code is clear that any ministerial media interventions need approval from No 10.

-AlJazeera

And the Tories are furious! The bloodbath forms quickly and loudly and the hounds start baying! Clown noses are flying everywhere! The factions are drawn! Because even now, there are Tories too stupid to understand that whether you agree with someone or not they still have to follow the rules! Also the other parties realise they can offer some actual opposition here, given that Suella has essentially dragged a barrel into the middle of the House of Commons dressed in a fish costume, handed around a set of loaded rifles, and then crawled inside to wait. The result is that the calls for her resignation are both deafening and pleasingly cross-party.

"(This is a) dangerous attempt to undermine respect for police", says Labour's shadow home secretary Yvette Cooper. "(It's) irresponsible," says London mayor Sadiq Khan. "The PM's weakness when it comes to standing up to Suella is the most shocking thing in all this," claims a senior Labour source.

They're wrong, of course. The most shocking thing is Liberal Democrat leader Sir Ed Davey realising he can actually appear in the paper if he plays this right and so surfaces to attempt some politics. "(Sunak) must finally act with integrity by sacking his out-of-control home secretary!" he declares, frightening many MPs who had forgotten he was even in the room with them.

Meanwhile, several Tories approach the BBC anonymously.

"The home secretary's awfulness is now a reflection on the prime minister. Keeping her in post is damaging him," says one. Another straight-up describes her as "unhinged". Another claims the comparison with Northern Ireland is "wholly offensive and ignorant", and really, all of this is permanently triggering that "Heartbreaking: the worst person you know just made a great point" reaction image.

Saturday

Hey, speaking of reaction images, look, Labour has a go:

Well. They tried.

BUT! Do you want to know the INTERESTING bit??!

Enter: Nadine Dorries! Mad shrieking pink harpy who spends her days maintaining a BoJo shrine in her bedroom! Always the most hinged of politicians, let's see what she has to say.

Former cabinet minister Nadine Dorries claimed Ms Braverman was trying to get sacked to give her a platform of martyrdom in service of the right-wing. "The competition is on now for who is going to be the leader of the opposition," Ms Dorries told the BBC.

???!??!?

PERTINENT POLITICAL OBSERVATION FROM DORRIES?!?!?? The most shocking part of this whole affair. Remember that time she yelled at a journalist during an interview about Boris Johnson's latest scandal when he asked her how Johnson was feeling about the whole thing and inadvertently implied they were having an affair when No One Asked? God, wonders never cease. She's even acknowledging the Tories can't win the next GE, look. I'd say this is growth, except I am 100% positive she's just being catty about BlowJo being fired again.

Anyway, the real Saturday issue: it's Armistice Day, and there's a pro-Palestine march planned.

Now, to give context, Armistice Day has a creepy level of patriotic state-worship attached to it in the UK. Some time in October everyone on telly suddenly starts wearing a poppy, and if you don't you get hanged, drawn and quartered by (a) the British press, and then (b) a baying mob outside your living room. You most be performatively sad. You must perform reverence and hero worship and say things like "Never again" all while whole-heartedly supporting current wars. You must talk about "our brave boys", and share the works of dead poets from the trenches, and then completely fail to absorb any of their lessons. If anyone tries to wear the white poppy to distance themselves from the current political appropriation while still commemorating the millions of conscripted casualties, you accuse them of being "woke" and pissing on the worthy dead of WW1. It's a whole thing, and politicians love using it as an excuse to point fingers and mock each other for being insufficiently patriotic if they wear the wrong tie to the ceremonies, or choose to walk with actual veterans rather than a head of the current army, or any number of other things. And then on November the 12th they'll order a drone strike or something.

So, off the bat, you can see how a pro-Palestine rally on the same day was likely to be seen as provocative to some.

"Some" included Sunak! He didn’t (publicly at least) ask the police to ban the protest, but did call on organisers to call it off, claiming the choice of date was “provocative and disrespectful”, because as I say, a march calling for the ceasefire of a genocide is super disrespectful to every sad dead poet in a trench who dreamed of a ceasefire so they could live, or something.

But the inevitable therefore happens, which is that far-right activists agree that it's disrespectful, and so decide to violently target the march to show their respect for the idea of peace on Armistice Day, or something.

Here's the planned route by the organisers:

Note, though, that the Armistice ceremony happens at the Cenotaph - visibly nowhere near the march. These two events actually wouldn't have overlapped, if it weren't for far-right protestors deliberately linking them to stop them being disrespectfully linked, or something.

And that's exactly what happened. From the Guardian:

Perhaps the most striking incident, though, was when far-right protesters charged past police who sought to hold them back from the Cenotaph. In this video, a man shouts “this is fucking our country” in celebration. Whereas the pro-Palestine march had been excluded from the area as a precaution, the far right was not; by overwhelming the police, they supposedly sought to defend the site from an enemy that simply wasn’t there.

(that's quite a good article of the whole thing, actually, I recommend giving it a read.)

Crucially to the clown show, though, several politicians and others accused Suella deVille of emboldening the far-right, which... well, several of the far-right protestors straight up said was the case on the day, so hard to disagree, really.

Rumours of a reshuffle in Whitehall circumnavigate the land so fast the truth gets sucked into a tornado and is declared MIA. Here's the thing! I've covered a few Cabinet reshuffles by now, Tumblrs, you know the drill. Reshuffles are always deniable until they actually happen – so if, say, a reshuffle was going to happen on Monday 13 November 2023, there’d be no need to publicise it in advance. That way, if things change and politics happen, you don't need to retract anything :)

Because, remember: reshuffles are always controversial. Yes, some people get demoted, and those people will often kick off, and some people who don't deserve it get promoted, and lots of people kick off. But the big thing is that a lot more people get overlooked for promotion.

His most ardent supporters would say that Rishi Sunak is a cautious man (if you'll allow me a moment to express my own view on the matter, Tumblrs, if you'll forgive this crumb of personal opinion amongst my otherwise impeccable journalling of greatest integrity, I once did a teambuilding task with my students where they had to build the best possible bridge out of uncooked spaghetti and pieces of marshmallow, and I personally would liken the structural integrity of his spine to the losing team's entry), and reshuffles will spread a lot of disappointment to Tory MPs who lose – or fail to gain – a cabinet position.

So, all in all... regardless of Suella's idiocy...

There's no guarantee of a reshuffle. Rumours are just that - whether they prove to be true or not remains to be seen.

Week Commencing Monday 13th November, 2023

New week, new challenges! And it's going to be a big week this week. On Wednesday (tomorrow, at time of writing), three big things are going to be announced, and these announcements will colour everything else this week:

One. The Supreme Court decide whether the government will be allowed to enact their plan to send some migrants claiming asylum in the UK to Rwanda, a signature Braverman plan that human rights campaigners (including many in Rwanda) have been trying to block for ages.

It’s a massive deal anyway – a flagship government idea that’s been bogged down in the court, and we’ll finally have an answer one way or another. For what it’s worth, the Tories aren’t confident about winning it, either. The optimists among them reckon it’s a 50/50 chance, the pessimists reckon it’s 70/30 against, so it's iffy at best.

But here's the thing!

Plenty of Tories have always disliked Suella. Others could handle the odd outburst she has, but can’t stomach the sheer number of them lately - the Lib Dem non-entity man was absolutely right that she is rapidly growing out of control and just does not know when to shut the entire fuck up.

Which means! If the Supreme Court allows the Rwanda plan, Braverman could become emboldened, like a far-right protest injuring police officers to defend the cenotaph from people who are nowhere near it and have no interest in it. Do we want an emboldened Braverman?? Well; no, obviously. I also don't want dysentery, or rotten meat, or a serial killer in my neighbourhood. But it's a question even Tories are asking themselves, which is notable.

Plus, even if the court allows it, there will still be months of planning, and lawyers might still prevent the plans in the long run... But psychologically, the issue is this: the government wants this win, but probably doesn’t benefit from Braverman feeling victorious.

Two. We’ll get inflation figures. The government promised to halve inflation, and it seems likely they’ve managed this. Expect them to massively celebrate this, to distract from the promises they haven’t kept e.g. waiting lists in England, competent governance, etc.

Three. Voting on a ceasefire in Israel seems likely for Wednesday. It’s the SNP’s idea, and it won’t affect government policy (they won’t support a ceasefire – they claim it’ll empower Hamas).

But it’s a big deal for Labour, even more so than the Tories. A Shadow minister has already resigned over the war. A bunch of frontbenchers want a ceasefire, but that isn’t Keir Starmer’s policy, a man who is calling for the colours of the Israel flag to be shown at sports matches to show that "we stand in solidarity with Israel", because you can really count on Starmer to fuck up everything he touches. So what do they do? Abstain? Claim they had a prior commitment?? We might see more resignations, basically. Big day for Starmer.

So! With all that in mind...

Monday

8.43am

Oh look. Timestamps are back. I wonder if that suggests anything?

Suella Braverman is sacked as Home Secretary.

But! Sunak is accused of waiting too long! Which he demonstrably did!

He should have made the decision after the illegal article that she shouldn't have written and triggered a far-right rally on fucking Armistice Day. Instead, remember that 'cautious' descriptor I talked about?? He waited until the tide had turned against her completely, and now looks like he (a) was too much of a useless wimp to fire her until he was sure people would still like him and pat his dick and tell him he's a Good PM, and (b) only fired her because he caved in to that appalling lefty liberal cabal that somehow these days includes the Metropolitan Police of all fucking people, and she'd have been able to stay otherwise.

Shout out to the best comment from Reddit:

u/nowonmai666: Doesn't she normally get sacked on a Friday so she can have the weekend off before being reappointed?

Anyway, that's the big risk now: Braverman’s supporters can claim she was only fired because Sunak caved in to the left.

8.56am

Tory MP Andrea Jenkyns claims Sunak only sacked Braverman because he caved in to the left.

9.00am

Neil O'Brian, Pharmacy Minister, quits to live out his stated dream of being a back-bencher with less power.

*sus*

9.09am

Nick Gibb, Schools Minister, quits to live out his stated dream of being more diplomatic, or something.

*sus*

9.42am

The Lib Dems decide to build on the success of their leader getting to be on telly for his one comment on Thursday and call for a general election. Says Ed Davey: “It was the Prime Minister’s sheer cowardice that kept her in the job even for this long. We are witnessing a broken party and a broken government, both of which are breaking this country.”

Good job! They're having such a good few days.

Anyway remember the Tories don’t have to have a general election until December 2024, though, thanks to the Fixed-term Parliaments Act (2011), which was passed by the coalition government of Tories and, um, Lib Dems. In which Ed Davey served for three years.

Hmm.

9.43am

James Cleverly (remember him?) returns to the Cabinet and is appointed Home Secretary. The party attempts to appear trendy by experimenting with emojis:

This appointment is probably because Tory strategists wanted him in a domestic role to help the party’s chances in the next election; as Surprising Political Pundit Nadine Dorries told us, of all fucking people, the race is now on to lead the opposition.

But hey, this is not likely to lead to any more changes -

10.03am

FORMER PRIME MINISTER, BREXIT-TRIGGERER AND PIG-FUCKER DAVID CAMERON BECOMES FOREIGN SECRETARY

!!!!!!!!!!!!

And look! Another emoji! They're so hip!

(Side note... the balls on this one are astounding, actually. The UK political system has been in chaos ever since Cameron, and he was the first domino. This is not a well-loved former hero that will be greeted warmly by the unwashed masses.)

Awkward though, since just last month Sunak claimed that we’d lived through “30 years of a political system that incentivizes the easy decision, not the right one.” It would be a terrible shame if a journalist was to ask David Cameron whether he agreed with the Prime Minister on that, given that Cameron’s job is to support the Prime Minister now.

Especially since Cameron took to Twitter last month to explicitly criticise Sunak for breaking the Tory promise to deliver High Speed 2.

(Cameron tweeted this criticism last month. Labour MP Angela Rayner however promptly retweets it now lol suck a dick Dave, but try a human one this time)

Also, fun fact, Cameron has just come out of a large-scale lobbying and corruption scandal. Given the state of Sunak, though, that's actually probably what got him the job.

BUT!!! Here's an even funner fact: the man is not an MP. He left politics after he accidentally triggered Brexit and then it came out he'd once face fucked a dead pig's head while it was held on the lap of another Tory; he's been living it up in the lucrative world of after-dinner speaking, as these people do.

So can you do that?? Can you hold a Cabinet position if no one at all has voted for you??

Yes, turns out.

Don't be alarmed by that, though:

But, convention holds that anyone who becomes a Cabinet member while not being an MP needs to be a Peer - that way, if they do bad and naughty things, they can't be held accountable by the House of Commons but they can be held accountable by the House of Lords. Only problem is, Hameron is not a lord...

10.13am

The reshuffle, bafflingly, continues. Jeremy Hunt will remain as chancellor.

For the first time since 2010, the top four positions in government – Prime Minister (Sunak), Chancellor of the Exchequer (Hunt), Home Secretary (Cleverly) and Foreign Secretary (Cameron) – are all held by men.

10.18am

Lots of people tweeting about the historic context of Cameron’s appointment. Here’s my favourite:

10.48am

David Cameron is given a life peerage, so his proper name now is Lord Piggledick.

10.52am

Health secretary Will Quince quits. He wasn’t planning to stand for re-election anyway though, so this one is probably not a shock. But it's important that no one else resi-

11.04am

Decarbonisation minister Jesse Norman resigns.

...

Time for a

✨Conspiracy Theory✨

Between Quince and Norman – as well as Neil O’Brien and Nick Gibb – we’re seeing several mid-ranking ministers resign, despite being generally regarded as fairly competent.

It’s possible they were fired in private, and they’re publicly resigning to save face. But here’s another theory.

MPs aren’t allowed to seek commercial employment for six months after resigning from the government.

So hypothetically, if you were going to lose your seat in a general election, you’d want to have resigned six months earlier so you can still get a job.

If that’s what these guys are doing, it suggests we’re on track for a May 2024 election...?

11.05am

11.12am

Remember Cameron's financial scandal? Quick background here: David Cameron was specifically vice-chair of a £1bn China-UK investment fund.

So let’s see what throwback former leader Iain Duncan Smith thinks of Cameron’s return:

“I am astonished at this appointment. It seems to send a signal to China that we are pursuing business with them at all costs and any costs. Those who have been sanctioned now feel more abandoned than at any time. Those facing genocide and persecution will feel more abandoned than at any time.”

I cannot believe I am about to say this.

But.

I agree with Iain Duncan Smith *spits on floor*

11.50am

Former Tory deputy prime minister Lord Heseltine is asked to sum up the return of Cameron, and says it’s the “clearest signal that the sort of right wing lurch that we’ve seen and the anti-European movement that we’ve seen has been put to bed, and that will get a message across to people”.

12.13pm

A Tory MP is worried that Cameron’s return will turn back the clock on Brexit and Johnson’s election.

“It is very alarming. I am predicting a softening on small boats, a softening on legal migration. I would not be surprised if the ban on conversion therapy returns.”

... Don’t threaten me with a good time.

Anyway, let’s see how the public actually sees Cameron compared with other PMs!

Yeah, not sure people will mind if Cameron’s not Boris Johnson.

12.43pm

ITV political editor Robert Peston walks past a minister of state. The minister’s on the phone, but takes a moment to heatedly shout at Peston, “The PM just sacked me!”

I guess some days are easier than others as a journalist

12.47pm

Therese Coffey resigns as environment secretary!!!!

*choirs of heavenly angels sing*

You'll remember her of course, Tumblrs - she was one of the thugs manhandling people into the 'right' voting lobbies to force their vote on the day of Liz Truss' fracking law. Rumour has it she still has the Whip handle in her ass.

A lot of people seem to be resigning today! But don't be fooled. In almost every case, it’ll be because they were told to resign. They’ve been sacked, but they resign to save face. A last mercy from their benevolent leader.

My guess: Tessie here is terrible at media skills, so – get rid of her before she hurts general election chances. This, too, is a pattern.

12.52pm

Rachel Maclean sacked as Housing Minister! Fun fact, numbers fans: it took Doctor Who 33 years to make it to eight Doctors, but since the 2019 election, the Tories managed eight Housing Ministers in just under 4 years

trololol

1.15pm

Jeremy Quin quits as Minister for the Cabinet Office.

1.37pm

Times Political Editor Steven Swinford reports that No 10 is struggling to find a new housing minister (owing to rumours the job is cursed). Several people have turned it down, including Jeremy Quin. It is incredible to me that they didn't line someone up before sacking the last guy.

Kemi Badenoch and Michael Gove are apparently unhappy that Rachel Maclean was removed from the role. I for one do not care about the opinions of Kemi Badenoch or Michael Gove.

2.04pm

Health Secretary Steve Barclay becomes Environment Secretary. This is effectively a demotion for him. It is our 5th Environment Secretary in four years. Chasing that Housing Minister record! It took 19 years for Doctor Who to have five Doctors

2.15pm

Richard Holden appointed new Conservative Party chairman.

A 2019-intake Tory MP, he led the charge against Sir Keir Starmer over Beergate, which did damage Starmer a bit (albeit not much, given that it turned out Starmer had complied with lockdown regs, and the accusation was nakedly to try and distract from Partygate). So this appointment looks like more strategy to win the next election - someone not known enough to be hated, with what passes in the modern Tory party for a proven track record.

This could be a sign that the Tories intend to at least try to shore up the Red Wall votes? As unlikely as the Tories are to keep those seats.

That said, Holden’s seat disappears in a boundary change next election, sooooo … we'll see what they do there.

2.24pm

Victoria Atkins appointed Health Secretary, replacing Steve Barclay who’s moved to Environment Secretary. She's a relative unknown but also considered actually competent. Massive middle finger to Steve Barclay

2.37pm

Laura Trott (formerly in pensions) promoted to Chief Secretary to the Treasury.

2.42pm

Science minister George Freeman resigns.

3.18pm

YouGov conducts a snap poll: is the appointment of David Cameron as Foreign Secretary a good decision or a bad decision?

Good decision: 24%

Bad decision: 38%

Don't know: 38%

So that's going well

3.24pm

Greg Hands is made a business minister after losing the Tory chairman role.

John Glen moves from chief secretary to the Treasury to become the Minister for the Cabinet Office and Paymaster General.

3.39pm

With Cameron being a Lord now, he’ll be based in the House of Lords rather than the Commons. The most recent Cabinet Minister to be based in the Lords was former Brexit minister Lord Frost, who did weigh in on the matter:

“[T]hough I was not running a whole Department too. I don’t think it works well to have a lead Cabinet Minister answering questions and defending their Department solely in the Lords. The Lords is not a fully party political environment - nor should it be - and voters are owed proper political scrutiny. In our system, that can only happen in the Commons.”

I cannot believe I am about to say this.

But.

I agree with Lord Frost *spits on floor*

The SNP had already called this out, with MP Stephen Flynn claiming, “The UK is not a serious country.”

4.21pm

Conservative MP Lee Rowley appointed the 16th housing minister in the past 13 years. Even counting David Tennant twice, that's more than all the Doctors Who we've ever had, and that took almost 60 years.

5.16pm

Sky News’s Tamara Cohen reports that Sunak sacked Braverman by phone this morning! Downing Street says there won’t be any exchange of letters between them - this is almost unheard of. Politics runs on paper trails! Everything happens through formal letters! By phone!

It means we’re denied insight into their differences. But Cohen reckons we’re likely to hear from Braverman on Wednesday, as the Supreme Court rules on the Rwanda scheme.

6.03pm

Tory MP Andrea Jenkyns, former Education Minister, submits no-confidence letter in Rishi Sunak.

It's almost like, in the absence of Dorries, she's decided that someone needs to step up and have a tantrum and that someone might as well be her. It is, actually, an extremely funny letter, as these letters go. Normally they're written with a sort of furious earnestness wrapped in formal language. I presume that Andrea Jenkyns MP, former Education Minister, was aiming for something similar, and the first paragraph manages it. But by the end you sort of start to wonder if this was supposed to be a letter she wrote with her therapist to get her feelings out:

My favourite line, when pulled in isolation, is "Yes Boris Johnson, the man who won the Conservative Party a massive majority, was unforgivable enough."

Yeah, Andrea babes. You're bang on there.

6.05pm

Esther McVey is appointed as Cabinet Office minister. Not a full cabinet member, but she will attend cabinet meetings.

This is notable: unlike a lot of today’s appointments, she’s on the right of the party. Her role will be to represent the government on TV and radio as much as possible, talking about gender/culture/British colonial history issues (i.e. she’s anti-woke and a screaming bigot).

In other words, with Braverman gone, McVey is an offering for the populist right of the party to try to appease them.

6.15pm

Sunak tweets about the new cabinet, claiming they’ll make “the right decisions for our great country, not the easy ones.” So it looks like that’s the new slogan, and we're pressing on with austerity

6.27pm

Tim Loughton, a Tory MP on the “One Nation” wing (i.e the David Cameron side) responds to Andrea Jenkyns’s letter of no-confidence by tweeting:

“Where can we submit a letter of no confidence in the Pantomime Dame?”

(It’s Andrea he’s publicly referring to as a pantomime dame there. A lil joke from the Tories for you)

6.31pm

Paul Scully sacked as minister for London. Didn't know that one was a position.

9.43pm

Sunak says that only a two-state solution will allow a new future for Israel/Palestine. This is, um, not what the Prime Minister of Israel wants. Who knows whether the Prime Minister of Israel will survive this crisis anyway – but these are big words from Sunak. Cameron’s influence? Maybe? Interesting either way

10.03pm

And then - PLOT TWIST!!!

According to ITV political editor Robert Peston, a senior government source reveals that Cameron was approached on TUESDAY.

Which means plans were underway to get rid of Braverman not only before the far-right violence on Saturday, but before her anti-police article on Wednesday. It seems she lost her job not because of what she said about police after all; but because she claimed homelessness was a lifestyle choice.

Well well.

11.05pm

And the day finishes with Andrea Leadsom back in government (as Under Secretary of State for Health and Social Care) which nobody saw coming! Pretty demeaning to the other 300 Tory MPs who could have been given this.

The final response from numerous Tories: they are feeling jilted and insulted because David Cameron being brought back when he's NOT EVEN AN MP, RISHI suggests that they themselves are not good enough to be in government.

No one tell them

#politik #clownfall: endgame

2K notes · View notes

snixkers · 3 months

Text

Superman

Pairing: Spencer Reid × GN! Reader

SUGGESTIVE CONTENT

Hurt/Comfort

For: Anonymous Request

Content Warnings: Hostage situation, reader held at gunpoint, unsub is shot and killed, canon level violence, heavy kissing, petting, suggestive

Summary: After you're in a hostage situation, Spencer lets you know you can't put yourself in danger like that again.

Author's note: Super happy with the way this turned out! Enjoy!

Feedback is always welcome!

Requests are OPEN

It was supposed to be a normal case just like any other, a serial killer loose on the streets of Chicago. The team had assembled a quick profile, but they didn't factor in one thing: a partner.

That's how you ended up in this situation, with the barrel of a gun resting on your temple and the unsub gripping your shoulders as your team tried to negotiate with the man.

He was getting more and more agitated, and his finger was slowly tightening on the trigger. You squeezed your eyes shut, preparing for the end, when you heard a gunshot. The unsub fell over behind you, dead.

You turned around to see where the shot came from, your jaw dropping as Spencer lowered his smoking gun and put it back in it's holster.

It's not that you weren't grateful, but you certainly weren't expecting Spencer to take a headshot in a hostage situation. That wasn't the way he did things. He'd provide plenty reasons it was unsafe, complete with alternatives.

Compared to the couple minutes you were being held at gunpoint, the next few hours went by shockingly fast. There was a lot of paperwork and interviews with the local police, but when it was over, you were grateful to get back to the hotel.

You were packing your bags and gathering your things when you heard a few sharp knocks at the door. The peephole revealed it was Spencer, so you opened it for him. He stepped in and closed it behind him, watching you for a few minutes before speaking up.

"You could've died earlier."

You bit your lip, unsure of what he was upset about.

"And you saved me. Thanks, by the way. You're my Superman."

He looked a bit frustrated now, running a hand through his hair. Clearly, your joke only served to agitate him.

"It's not funny. I shouldn't have had to do that. You need to stop putting yourself it danger."

You snorted now. He was a such a hypocrite.

"This job is dangerous."

His eyes softened, and he reached down to take your hand in his. "Please. I'm worried because I might not be able to save you someday."

You nodded, leaning closer and giving him a half-hearted hug.

"I am. I will be. Okay?"

He nodded, his eyes fixed on you for a while before he leaned forward and gave you a kiss.

You quickly returned it, your hand intertwining with his and pulling him closer. He wasted no time grabbing you by the waist and pressing up against you, deepening the kiss as goosebumps grew on the skin he touched.

As shy as he was, his hands sure weren't. He palmed at your chest before trailing his fingers down your body to rest on the curve of your ass. You matched his pace, tugging at his tie, when-

Knock knock

Garcia's cheerful voice broke the silence. "Hotch says to get out or we're leaving without you! That means you too, Reid! I know you're in there!"

The two of you quickly sprang apart, fixing your hair and clothes before looking away from each other. You grabbed your bags, and he went back to his room to grab his, meeting you in the lobby of the hotel.

And throughout the entire ride home on the jet, he kept his eyes on you.

#criminal minds #criminal minds fandom #criminal minds fanfiction #writers on tumblr #fanfic #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid hurt/comfort #reqs open

586 notes · View notes

daydreams-after-dark · 4 days

Text

Free Use Jail Cell, Part 2

Police Officer Skz ot8 x female reader

Premise: you're arrested and held for 24 hours by 8 police officers at the local police station / reader has her fantasy play out.

Word Count: 3k (part 2)

Chapter Summary: You're interrogated by 2min.

a/n: This fic will be in multiple parts because I get too impatient not to share what I’ve written so far. There will be two, possibly three installments (tag list is open).

I refer to the officers as “Officer Hyunjin”, “Officer Minho” etc just to make it quick to identify the characters.

The whole premise is planned and explained in the fic. The story is purely fantasy, but please be mindful of content warnings, as it has potentially triggering content. I want you to be safe here on my blog.

CW: dom 2min, sex toys (various: anal and vaginal), stretch kink, harness restraints, paddles, spanking, nipple clamps, double pen same hole (toy and penis) double pen two holes (oral and vaginal), anal penetration, everything is unprotected, degradation, face slap, hair tugging, shoe on face (really quick), collar and leash, cum eating, creampie, safeguards are in place to stop everything if reader wants/needs to. Aftercare.

🚨🚨🚨🚨

Chief Chan leads you to the interrogation room himself. "Now I don't want to find out you've been insolent, you hear me? Although I know Officer's Seungmin and Detective Minho are more than capable of handling you. Go." he pushes you into the empty room, closing the door behind you and locking it.

You gulp and slowly take in the space around you. It's not a modern interrogation room. It looks like a morgue. The brick walls are cold and gray, the concrete under your bare feet is filthy. You're not sure what the dark stains that are splattered around the place are either, and you try not to think the worst. This isn't real. You remind yourself.

In the center of the room is a stainless steel table. Beside it a stainless steel trolley, with what appears to be dildos, straps, and various other paraphernalia, and - oh fuck - a paddle hanging from a hook on the side. The entire room is illuminated, barely, by a single naked globe hanging from the concrete ceiling above.

There are no chairs, nowhere for questioning to occur, but you have a sneaking suspicion that you'll be on that cold, hard slab of a table very soon.

You hear the door unlock and your heart pounds loudly. Fuck. This is it. You take a deep, grounding breath as you watch Officer Seungmin and Detective Minho enter the room.

"On your knees, pup." Seungmin spits, immediately shoving you to the ground and pushing the sole of his combat boot into your cheek. Your face presses against the disgusting concrete. He doesn't push harder than he needs to, but just the act itself makes you feel so small, helpless and filthy.

You sense the Detective walk over to the trolley, then back towards you, leaning over you and placing a leather collar and leash around your neck. Suengmin removes his boot, and Minho tugs you up until you're on your knees.

"Look at this pathetic little bitch." Minho leans over you and pushes your hair out of your face. "Someone has been a very bad little girl." He scolds. "And we're going to find out exactly what you're keeping from us." He smirks evilly.

"Up." Suengmin barks, from behind you, taking the leash from Minho and yanking on it until you're standing in front of him. He presses his body against your back, breathing in your ear menacingly, making you shudder. He snakes a hand up underneath the hem of your oversized shirt, the only thing you're wearing, and slides his fingers through your folds. "This is gonna be so much fun." he chuckles low. "Up on the table." he slaps you hard on the ass.

The table is barely big enough to fit you, and you realize it's designed so two people can access you easily from either end. You're instructed to kneel on all fours, with your feet almost hanging off one end, and your head extending precariously over the other end, so you get another view of the filthy floor.

Minho picks up a pair of metal scissors and your eyes widen as he cuts your clothing and rips it off you so you are naked and bare for them. Then you’re adorned with a ball gag with attached nipple clamps.

"We can't have you being a brat. We don't need you to say a word for us to get what we want from you." Seungmin says, as he secures the clamps tightly to your nipples. The sensation of your nipples being pinched sends a spark of arousal to your cunt and you immediately feel yourself becoming moist.

"Here. Keep this in your hand." Minho places a small device in your palm. "Press this button and everything stops immediately. You understand?" he says quietly looking into your eyes. You nod. Once he's certain you understand, he’s back in character.

The two men take their time circling you, taking you in, deciding how they are going to proceed. They look dominating, cold, mean. They start to touch you, stroke your body, your back, the backs of your thighs. All with villainous smirks plastered on their beautiful faces.

“Let’s start with a punishment.” Minho decides, grabbing the paddle.

Your eyes widen and you try to swallow, but it’s so hard with the ball gag in your mouth, and you brace yourself as he settles behind you. The impact of the paddle takes you by surprise, making you cry out a muffled sob. Again, Minho brings the paddle to your fleshy ass cheek with a loud slap. You drop your head and squeeze your eyes closed. It fucking stings, but at the same time your cunt throbs. How can this hurt so much yet feel so arousing?

Minho soothes the skin with the palm of his hand before delivering another hit. You grip onto the edge of the steel table with your free hand, while trying to stabilize yourself with the hand that’s holding your safety device.

Another round of paddling ensues, and you’ve lost count of how many you’ve taken. Your ass feels red raw, and the tears are running freely down your face. You feel pathetic, useless, helpless. No one’s ever been able to make you feel this way before. You’ve finally found what you’ve been looking for.

“Enough.” Seungmin raises his hand signaling for Minho to stop. “Let me inspect.” he moves behind you to marvel at his partner’s work. “Fuck. Look how red she is.” He runs his palm over your red cheek and you wince. “Shh… Now now.” Suengmin purrs, but there is absolutely no hint of concern in his tone. “We haven’t even gotten started. That was just punishment for making our cocks so hard.”

You drop onto your elbows, already exhausted from “just the punishment”, and sob. Seungmin crouches in front of you and lifts your head so you’re looking directly into his cold eyes. “Hey, Pup.” He slaps your cheek, hard. The sting makes you feel more alert. “Minho’s going to do his probing now.” He raises an eyebrow. “And you’re going to be an obedient little pup and take. Every. Single. Inch.”

Your stomach drops, and you feel your juices leak from your cunt. The anticipation, the fear, the excitement of what is unfolding has your heart racing.

Suengmin stands back up and leans against the wall to watch Minho, whom you can hear rustling around at the trolley. You hear the sound of a bottle opening and closing. Then with one hand holding your hip steady, he presses a solid, cold, lubed object against your vaginal entrance.

“It’s just a dildo. Nothing to be scared of. Deep breath through your nose.” he commands and pushes the dildo into your cunt. The stretch feels good and you wonder why on earth you were fearful. It feels regular sized. He fucks you with it for a few minutes, until your hips are rocking back and you’re arching your back in a such away it makes their cocks throb.

“Seungmin, come help hold her steady.” He instructs his partner, and he is at your side helping hold your hips still. You whine in protest around the gag, and then you feel Minho press the dildo in further. Your eyes almost pop out of your head and your whole body tenses, when you're abruptly spread twice as wide. You feel like you’re being ripped in two as you realize the dildo has a bulbous base. The tip now presses hard into your cervix as your opening is being stretched obscenely wide. You’re so full. You feel so full.

“Suengmin, fuck look at how much she stretches. She’s gonna look good when two cocks are inside that slutty little cunt.” Minho declares.

“Fucking slut.” Seungmin says in a disgusted tone.

“She has to take more.” Minho says flatly, reaching for something from the trolley, and then another lubed object presses against your ass. You try to squirm to no avail, and cry out when a hand slaps you on your sore, red cheek. “Sluts have to behave themselves or they will regret it.” Suengmin warns.

You pause and try to relax as Minho pushes the device past the tight ring of muscle. “I don’t know why you’re squirming? This is just to prep you. You’re gonna have to take a much bigger one shortly.” he advises.

He’s right. After torturing your ass with increasingly bigger devices, he is ready to insert the “big” one. It’s thick and it feels endless, reaching places no one, or thing, has ever reached before. You can hardly hold yourself up, and you’re on the verge of what you can tell will be an earth shattering orgasm. You are scared. You’re not allowed to come without permission, and part of you thinks that maybe you won’t be given permission at all. Although, you are sure that they will rip at least one from you before this interrogation is over. All so they’ll have a reason to punish you further.

Minho, silently works on fucking your ass and cunt with the two oversized devices until you are a fucking mess. You can’t keep it contained any longer and a brutally intense orgasm hits you so hard you shake uncontrollably and almost slip entirely off the table.

“Fucking whore!” Growled Seungmin. “Who told you you could come?” he came around to the front and tugged your head up by your hair. “You just want us to punish you more, don’t you? Well. That’s exactly what you’re gonna get." He lets go of your head abruptly, and removes your ball gag, resecuring it around your neck with your collar. You can finally breathe properly and you start to cry.

“No. No one said you can cry. We haven’t given you anything to cry about yet.” Snarls Seungmin.

The dildos are removed and you’re repositioned onto your back, your knees thankful for the relief. But this new position isn’t any more comfortable. The table, being so short in length, means your head hangs over the edge, whilst you have no option to fold your legs up because your ass comes to the other edge. Perfect for what is about to happen.

Your legs are strapped with leather restraints to keep legs bent and folded towards your chest and your wrists are cuffed and attached to ankle restraints. You’re essentially folded in half and spread open, with no way of moving, and for them to do whatever they please. The little alarm buzzer is placed in your hand for safekeeping.

You see Minho in your upside down vision, unbuckling his belt and releasing his cock. Your mouth waters at the memory of taking him down your throat just a few hours before, and you are more than pleased when he approaches you. “Open up, time to be fed again.” he holds your face steady as he slides his cock all the way into your throat. You can take him a lot easier in this position, and he uses it to his advantage, fucking your face rough and deep. He doesn’t care that you’re gagging, or that you can’t breathe when he pushes his entire cock in and stills. He pulls out, letting you fill your lungs, and then he’s back inside cutting the air off.

You squeak when you feel something cold, slimy and flexible being squeezed into your pussy. Minho pulls out. “Wanna see what Seungmin’s doing?” He taunts. He supports your head as you lift yourself and look down at your pussy. Seungmin is holding what looks to be a silicone or rubber snake-like device. It’s about an inch and half in diameter and so fucking long. Maybe three feet long? Your eyes widen. “Don’t be so alarmed. He’s not gonna stuff the entire thing inside you.” sneers Minho. “Now, back to being a cockslut.” he drops your head back down and resumes fucking your face.

All you’re imagining though, is Seungmin pushing more and more of that - was it a snake? A hose? Fuck, is it even a sex toy or is it some random thing from the hardware store? - into your cunt.

“Yup, that’s as far as it's gonna go.” Sighs Seungmin. It’s deep, but not filling you out too much, not like that monstrous dildo from earlier. Until you feel the tip of his cock pushing in alongside it. Minho, as if pre-empting your protests, holds you by your neck keeping you steady and deliberately fucks you hard and fast. “You’re gonna take it, kitten. Everything.” he hisses.

You can’t cry. You can’t scream. You can only take what they are giving you. Your throat hurts, but Minho doesn’t seem like he’s going to tire anytime soon.

Once Seungmin is fully inside you, he starts to thrust, building up the pace quickly. You’re so wet and stretched already that it doesn’t take long for your walls to adjust to him. The men fuck both ends of your body, using you like a fleshlight. Growling, grunting, making sounds of approval as you simply lay there and take it.

“I wanna fucking come in her mouth.” states Seungmin.

They pull out of you simultaneously, leaving you gasping and gaping. You’re so empty, even with that fucking snake situation still in your cunt.

Your mouth is filled first, with Seungmin sinking into you. You can taste your juices coating his cock, mixed with lube. Like earlier in the cell, Seungmin is rougher, more erratic with his thrusts than Minho, and you gag much more as he fucks you. He runs his hands along your body then squeezes both your breasts hard. You arch off the table as he tugs on the nipple clamps. You moan around Seungmin, who must not have been expecting it, and he cums down your throat with a “how dare you, you fucking slut.”

You’re secretly satisfied as you swallow him down. “You still need your mouth stuffed. I don’t want to hear you and your pathetic little whines.” he finds the other end of his ‘snake-friend’, and starts to shove it into your mouth. He pulls some sort of extension out from the table, a headrest, so you don’t have to keep dangling your neck. How thoughtful.

Minho lubes himself up and presses himself to your anus, pushing in the entire way. He fills you so good. He pulls out halfway and thrusts back in, and it’s too much. You come again. You know they see you quivering, and they’re not happy.

“Just keep fucking her, Minho. Might as well just force her to come over and over at this point. Until she begs us to stop. Oh wait. Her mouth’s full, she won’t be able to. Shame.” The Officer laughs.

Minho doubles down, on a mission to rip as many orgasms out of you as he can, overstimulating you in the process. How much can you take before you need to hit your safety alarm? You’re determined not to. You want to take everything. Minho grasps the snake dildo and tries to jam more of it into you, but it won’t fit, and you cry out.

“Fuck, I’m hard again. Haven’t you even blown yet?” Seungmin looks to Minho in disbelief.

“Course I fucking have, but I’m not done, bitch feels too fucking good. Gotta fuck my cum deep into her, y’know.” he grunts. He reaches out to grab yet another device, this time a small vibrator and presses it onto your clit. “Fucking come, kitten.” He growls.

Your eyes roll into the back of your head and you convulse as you come again. Minho doesn’t stop, he continues to fuck into your ass, still hard as stone, turning you into a sobbing, overstimulated wreck.

“Again.” he pushes the vibrator harder against you with one hand and attempts to fuck you with the snake dildo, all whilst not missing a beat with his thrusts.

Where the fuck Seungmin gone you had no idea. Until you feel him tightening your nipple clamps and then pulling out the snake and replacing it with his cock.

“The detective said ‘come again’, pup.” He thrusts into your mouth and fills you with his cum again. He pulls out and wipes some on your cheek.

One final time, you come, trembling on the table, the straps and restraints dig into your skin as you fight against your restraints. You can’t possibly take any more. They seem to know too.

Minho pulls out, and you wonder if he even came a second time. You manage a glance at his cock and it looks painfully hard, and you’re not sure why he just didn’t use you until he came again.

He pushes your cheeks wide, spreading your holes and sighs when you feel cum dribble out. He slips an anal plug in to keep the rest inside you.

The straps, restraints, chains, clamps are all removed from you carefully and you’re cleaned with warm, wet towels from a cabinet under the table.

Seungmin applies cream to soothe where you were spanked, and helps you put on a fresh oversized button down shirt, and Minho carries you bridal-style back to your cell. You nuzzle your head against him and close your eyes. You’re absolutely exhausted. He enters your cell and places you down on the mattress, pulling a blanket over you. Such a contrast to the treatment just before.

“Detective?” You whisper, looking up at him. “You didn’t get to finish.” you say in a small voice.

He shrugs. “That back there wasn’t about me.” He half smiles. “It was about satisfying you.”

“But what if finishing you off would satisfy me even more?” You ask.

“You need your rest.” He grunts, ignoring your advances, tucking the blanket around your chin.

“It’ll help me sleep.” You plead.

“Fuck!” He sighs and looks up to the ceiling. “Where do you want my cock then, kitten?”

“In my cunt.” You purr.

He swallows hard. “Fine.” he concedes. “But - I come inside, and you gotta keep it safe in your tight little pussy. Got it?”

You nod fervently, lifting the blanket that he’d just tucked you snugly in, and let him slide on top of you. He removes his shirt and undoes his pants with nimble fingers and frees his cock, then grips your thigh, pushing it wide and grinding against your sore core.

“Will you kiss me, detective?” You gaze up at him.

“I don’t do kissing on the mouth.” He says flatly.

He sees you pout around that.

“I can kiss your neck. If that’s what you want.”

“Please.” you wrap your hands about his neck as he hovers over you, peppering kisses to your neck, and sucking the skin while he fucks you slow, but extra hard. You feel so full with the anal plug still in your ass. “You’re so tight, bet you’re tender? Am I hurting you?” He whispers.

“Feels good.” you mewl.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum real soon. Can I fuck you evenharder?” He chokes.

“Yes.” you sigh, letting him take what he needs from you.

“I’m coming…ngh…fuck.” he thrusts his hips three more times then you feel him empty himself inside you. “Keep it in there for me.” He plants a peck on your forehead and pulls out carefully.

You’re asleep before he even leaves the cell.

🚨🚨🚨🚨

↣↣ Next up: you’re taken in your sleep by Hyunjin and Han

@channieandhisgoonsquad @noellllslut @itsseohannbin @weareapackofstrays @3rachasdomesticbanana @palindrome969 @xxkissesforchanniexx @chuuchuu1224 @fun-fanfics @wolfennracha @rhonnie23 @jisunglyricist @strayywayy @armystay89 @igetcarriedawaywithyou @mylittleponeypinkrosieposie @kyunchoni @justforreaders @melochacco @scenuniverse @oddracha @txa-r

@jeonginsleftcheek @meilix @itgirlalisaa @linocz @bubblebisk @boi-bi-ahaha @frozenpeasworld @grandma143 @milkypinkmimi @bangchansbbgirl @leefelixsslut @privhace @justforreaders @galaxycatdrawz @melochacco @jiwoos-baby-girl @lunearta @kavifornia @chuuyaobsessed @iadorethemskz @hyun-hwanj @favieeerrrr @courtnort455

#skz smut #skz ot8 x reader #2min smut #seungmin x reader #lee know x reader

268 notes · View notes

r-is-typing · 4 months

Note

hi there! welcome back to tumblr!

could I please request a spencer reid x reader where the reader is the newest member of the bau but gets kidnapped on a case? thank you!

p.s. extra points if the reader loves puzzles and books!

decipher | s.r

summary: in which the newest member of the bau gets taken request: hi there! welcome back to tumblr! could I please request a spencer reid x reader where the reader is the newest member of the bau but gets kidnapped on a case? thank you! p.s. extra points if the reader loves puzzles and books! pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader category: angst with a happy ending content warnings: mentions of violence, kidnapping, really anything mentioned in criminal minds word count: 1.6k+ send in your requests here!

Y/N groaned, walking into the small room that the BAU was using in Delaware's local police station while they were there for a case. "What's wrong, pretty girl?" Derek raised a curious brow.

Y/N looked at the evidence board. "I just don't see what we're missing! It's been four days now, and we're no closer than when we got here to solving this."

Spencer looked up from his reading. "I've been reading for a while and can't decipher these puzzles." The tall man stood up, walking to a board they had with various puzzles tacked onto it. The Unsub had left pieces of paper at every crime scene with different variations of codes that seemed like coordinates of some kind. "43 11 51 15 44 23 15 32" "31 15 44 43 35 31 11 54" "23 15 31 35 32 15" Y/N stared intensely at the numbers, trying to get anything to tell her what they meant. "Okay, maybe we need to go over the profile again. What's the deal with this guy?" JJ started to speak. "Well, the guy's a narcissist first, but.. he could be devolving. He was skilled the first few kills, but this last one... we found mistakes, he slipped up. So, does that mean his clues will too?" Spencer stood next to Y/N. "It very well could, but until we figure out the code..." Hotch finished his sentence. "There's nothing we can do. The best thing to do right now is go back to the hotel and rest, we can come back tomorrow with fresh minds. That's an order." Y/N told the team she'd catch up, she was just going to go to the restroom, so they left and headed to the hotel. She watched them leave and as soon as they left her eye sight, she ran back into the boardroom. She needed to figure out this code. People's lives depended on it. Y/N began looking everywhere online possible to lead her to what kind of code this was. "Agent L/N?" An officer stuck their head into the room, making Y/N look up. "We've just received another note... There seems to have been one we missed in our initial sweep." Y/N jumped up quick taking the note from the officer. "Thank you."

Y/N opened the note and was met with something she wasn't expecting. Another code but at the bottom, it said "Tap tap tap". Y/N widened her eyes. Why didn't she think of tap code? It was brilliant. Y/N spent the next fifteen minutes solving each of the puzzles she got. She went to the board writing next to each decipher.

"43 11 51 15 44 23 15 32" -> "save them" "31 15 44 43 35 31 11 54" -> "let's play" "23 15 31 35 32 15" -> "help me" and then the newest cipher:

"11 12 11 33 14 34 33 15 14 23 34 45 43 15 31 24 12 42 11 42 54" -> "abandoned house library" Y/N gasped, running out of the police station and hopping into the vehicle the team left for her, heading to this abandoned house that they had thought they cleared the day before. "I knew it.." Y/N mumbled to herself, pulling in front of the house. Y/N quickly ran into the house, gun pointing in front of her. She swung to the right, hearing a noise but ultimately nothing. "I just knew you'd fall for my trap. The last note was just for you, Agent. Those girls aren't here, but you however..." A voice from behind her spoke, hitting her over the head with a chunk of wood before she could turn and shoot him. Y/N fell to the floor, knocking unconscious . The Unsub smirked, picking her up over his shoulder and carrying her out to his truck, driving away quickly before anyone would be able to find them.

The next day, the team arrived to the station early. "Anyone hear from Y/N? I didn't see her at the hotel this morning." Emily asked, looking around. This made the team share a look of confusion. "Excuse me? What time did Agent L/N leave last night?" JJ asked one of the officers. "Well, shortly after I gave her a note that was delivered here, she ran out of here quicker than I could even see with my own eyes. I figured she was just sick or somethin'." The officer told the team. "Guys..." Spencer looked at the board with the ciphers, noting a new one pinned, along with their deciphers right next to them. "I think the Unsub knew Y/N was here alone and lured her.. She was able to figure out the cipher. It's tap code."

Hotch looked at Reid. "Who would be smart enough to understand tap code?" Reid scrambled to get his phone out of his pocket. "Garcia," He started as she picked up the phone. "Out of the list of possible suspects we had, cross match those with anyone who recently got out of prison." Typing could be heard on the other end of the phone. "Uh, there's two. Robert Smart and Henry David. Henry got out just two weeks ago, and Robert got out two days ago."

Hotch begins to speak, but was interrupted by Penelope. "Sending Henry's address and work now to your cells. Her majesty out." A click was heard and Penelope's voice was gone.

The team ran out of the station, half of the team splitting up. "Well, he wouldn't take her to his work..." Derek called Garcia again, asking about any abandoned buildings, or anything in that area that would be the perfect spot to keep someone.

"It seems like his parents had owned a storage unit but the storage company itself went bankrupt last year, so there's just a whole bunch of abandoned storage units. His..." Penelope pauses, typing more. "is number 378."

Derek does a quick u-turn, speeding towards the storage unit. "Why would she go off without us?" Spencer looked at Derek and then Rossi. "Kid, she probably wasn't expecting this. I mean, it seemed perfect that we had just talked about him devolving and then he gives a precise location." Rossi puts a comforting hand on Reid's shoulder, comforting him as much as he could.

The three jumped out of the SUV as they arrived at the abandoned area. Spencer rushed ahead of them, his gun held steady, in case of any surprises as they walked slowly.

367, 371, 375 Finally, they found Unit 378 and looked at each other, nodding before lifting the storage and finding Henry and Y/N. Henry held a gun to her head as she stared directly at the three men ahead of her. "You take one more step, and she's dead!" Henry screams. Spencer tensed. "You don't want to do that, Henry." He raised his hands, putting his gun back in his holster. "We know what your mom did to you, okay? You shouldn't have had to go through that."

Henry's eyes flashed with anger as he cried. "She left me! Abandoned me as if I was nothing!" Y/N kept eye contact with Spencer. "Henry, it's alright, we're going to get you help. Just put down the gun, okay?" Spencer slowly took a step, seeing Henry's guard starting to come down. "If you put the gun down, we can help you. We can tell the judge you cooperated with us." Y/N spoke, not breaking eye contact with Spencer who stared at Henry.

Henry's hand dropped the gun as he dropped to the ground and cried. Derek ran over, cuffing him. "Henry David, you're being arrested for the murder of three women, kidnapping, and the assault of an FBI agent. You have the right to remain silent-" Morgan's voice cut off as he walked out of the storage, Rossi in tow.

Spencer rushed over to Y/N, untying her and helping her to her feet. Y/N was quick to hug him as she cried. "I'm so sorry. I really thought.." Spencer shushed her, walking her out of the storage unit where JJ, Hotch, and Emily stood waiting for her. "You're okay!" JJ ran over and embraced the girl.

"Hotch, I-"

Hotch shook his head. "As much as what you did was careless, you were smart with your actions. If it wasn't for your smart thinking and logic, we wouldn't have been able to decipher the code."

Y/N nodded to Hotch, then looked up at Spencer. "I didn't mean to worry everyone.." The girl pouted. Spencer just rubbed her shoulder. "I know, but you're okay now, that's what matters."

Y/N looked up at him. "I knew you guys would come for me once you saw the cipher, but I honestly thought I was going to die in there... which got me thinking."

Spencer looked at her in confusion. "Do you wanna do something when we get back to Quantico?" Y/N asked, a tint of red painted across her face.

"Like a..?"

"Yes, genius. Like a date. I've got to repay my knight in shining blue vest somehow as a token of my appreciation for saving me."

Spencer nodded, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I'd, uh, I"d like that." Y/N smiled. "Perfect." She quickly walked to JJ and Emily after. Spencer looked over to Derek who had clearly witnessed the exchange, a large smirk sprawled across his face.

"Shut up." Spencer mumbled to him, shuffling past him quickly. He then stopped, realizing what she had said. "Knight in shining blue vest?"

r is typing... thank you so much for the request and the warm welcome back! i hoep you enjoy, i loved writing this! :) r is signing off...

#requests open #reqs open #request #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds x reader #r-is-typing #spencer reid angst

231 notes · View notes

gardens-light · 11 months

Text

Finding Peace

Taking shelter in an abandoned petrol station, tension builds between you and your family. As blame and arguments raise- not like you didn't feel guilty enough already. You didn't ask for this- any of this! You just wanted to help Optimus. And it's not like the Autobot leader didn't have problems of his own. Being hunted down by humans for reasons yet unknown was bad enough- but ignoring the yearning of his Spark has slowly become problematic. Occasionally shaking his helm attempting to get you out of his processors, trying to convince himself that a 'Sparkmate' was nothing but a romancide idea that the younger bots came up with. Or is it?...

Content: Minor coarse language. Event's take part in Transformers- Age of Extinction. (Leading to major spoilers in Part 4.) Optimus x Human F/Reader. Fluff. (Reader insert.)

Sparkmate Series- Part 1 Part 2 Part 4 Part 5

"Well... on the bright side." Tessa's voice lowly spoke, while sitting upon a dusty bar. Playing with some fairy lights. "You two have finally met.."

"Where's he from?"

"I told you. He's a driver from Texas."

"Texas?" Cade scoffed at Tessa's words. "Where? Dublin, Texas? Shamrock, Texas? So why does he sound like a leprechaun?"

Shane's brows knitted together, as he leaned against the bar. "You'd get your ass kicked in Ireland for saying that."

"Well we're not in Ireland, Lucky Charms. We're in Texas." Cade's attention turned back onto Tessa. "So he drives? What's that supposed to mean? Like he drives for a living?"

"Yeah... at least he makes a living."

Tessa's words caused Cade to fall silent. His eyes flickering up to you, frowning as you tried to avoid him.

"How old are you?" Cade challenged, approaching Shane.

"Twenty."

"And my daughter is seventeen. So as far as I'm concerned, this can go two ways." Cade leaned on the other side of the bar, glaring at Shane. "One, I punch you in the mouth right here, right now. And you call the police on me."

"Dad!-"

"Or two. I just call the cops on you because this is illegal. She's a minor!"

Steady... Steady... your thoughts wandered, while trying to focus on making a 'house of cards' out of beer coasters.

"We're protected by the 'Romeo and Juliet laws'-"

"We dated for a little while." Tessa explained, cutting Shane off. "I was a sophomore, and he was a senior. It's fine."

"We've got a pre-existing juvenile foundational relationship. Statute 2705-3." Shane took out his wallet, showing Cade the small card stating the law. "We're above board."

Cade sighed, "Romeo and Juliet, huh? Do you know how they ended up?"

Just... one more coaster...

"In love-"

"Dead." Cade turned to you. "And you, Y/N?"

Shit...

An unamused expression fell across your features as the coasters came tumbling down.

"Don't look at me like that, young lady. How long have you known about this?"

Cade rubbed his temples as you silently responded with a small shrug. "Well tell me. Days? Weeks?-"

"Months."

"Months...? And you didn't think that I would of wanted to know about this?-"

"Dad. Tessa is a full grown ass adult." You groaned. "She's capable of learning from a mistake or two."

"I trusted you. Both of you-"

"To what?" Tessa butted in. "Never have fun. Take a risk. Be a normal teenager like you?"

"I am your father, okay!" Cade firmly spoke, turning his attention onto Tessa. "And I've been busting my ass to take care of you and your sister!-"

"Oh so is that why I'm busting a gut trying to juggle two jobs?" You scoffed. "And here I thought, I'm the one who took care of this family."

"Is that what you were doing when you continued working on that damn truck?" Tessa spoke to you. A frown forming upon her lips, "all you had to do was report it.-"

"You know I couldn't do that-"

"And now we're forced into hiding. And my life is over! So 'thank you', Sis. You've taken 'real good' care us-"

"None of this would of happened! If you just kept your fucking mouth shut!-"

"Don't talk to your sister like that!" Cade stepped in.

"Sure Dad. Take her side... you always do."

"Y/N-"

"Look! I get it!" you raised onto your feet. "I know I'm 'the disappointment', 'the let down'-"

"Sweetie, I've never said that-"

Your eyes wandered over your dad's disappointed expression. "You didn't had to..."

---

Sitting upon the petrol stations' roof, the gentle breeze of the cool night air felt refreshing against your skin. Soft chirping of crickets eased your headache, your eyes gazing out into the dark empty road. The sound of small grunts and sighs caught your attention, briefly gazing over your shoulder. Rolling your eyes, once seeing Tessa struggling to climb the ladder with a mug in hand.

"What do you want?" you sighed, turning your attention back onto the road ahead.

"I thought- ouch!- that you could do with a hot drink."

The sound of the metal roofing warping and creaking, under Tessa's feet suddenly felt loud. As she approached you, taking a sit upon the roof's edge, leaving a small gap between you.

"I made your favourite." She kindly spoke, handing you the hot beverage. "I couldn't make it exactly to your liking, but it's the thought that counts. Right?"

Her weak smile faded as you remained silent. Speechlessly accepting the mug from her and holding it in your hands.

"You're not a disappointment." Tessa spoke after a brief hesitation. "For if it wasn't for you, we would of lost our home ages ago."

Tessa bit her lip before continuing, "I... did tell a friend about the truck. B-But I honestly didn't think he would believe me! If I knew- I wouldn't of..."

Your side glance caused her voice to trail off into silence.

"Well... what I'm trying to say... is that I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

Sipping the hot beverage, feeling the gentle warmth fill you inside. Tessa followed your gaze, a small smile returning to her lips.

"You're worried about him. Aren't you?"

"Is it that obvious?"

"Yes." Tessa teased. "Like a lovesick girl."

You returned her smile, playfully pushing her away. "Oh shut up. You're talking nonsense, I'm just concerned about him. That's all."

"Uh-huh?" Tessa raised an eyebrow. Seeing a glimpse of you trying to hide a shy smile behind the mug.

"So... What's Dad doing?" you asked, trying to change the subject.

"Playing with some drone that he stole from the one of the guys. Dad's convinced that they would of truly killed us."

Tessa's heart sank as she watched you pull your legs close to your chest, hugging your knees a little while resting your mug against them.

"B-But that's just Dad's crazy thought." Tessa's guilt weighed on her heart a little more. Starting to wish she never said anything.

"Everything would of been fine, if only I watched what I was saying." You buried your head, resting your forehead against your knees and hiding your face. "I-If I didn't panic..."

"Shhh. Shhh." Tessa cooed, closing the gap between you. Placing her arm around your shoulders and resting her head against yours. "It's not your fault. You have a big heart, Y/N. Never be ashamed of that."

She gently pulled away, cupping your tearstained face and making you face her. "You are a rare treasure, and that Transformer better know that."

Finally smiling through your tears, Tessa rested her forehead against yours. The sound of a horn blaring in the distance broke the silence, while bright headlights burned the darkness away. You quickly raised onto your feet, causing Tessa to catch the falling mug while the hot beverage spilled onto the ground below.

You placed both hands against your chest, while gazing at the oncoming truck. Feeling it flutter with joy, as the sound of a faminular engine came to your ears.

Tessa rose onto her feet, giving you one last soft glance before leaving. A knowing smile forming upon her lips. You've got it bad...

Optimus carefully reduced his speed, as he walked out of his altmode. Trying to slow the pulsing rhythm of his spark as he approached you. Being mindful of each step he took, so it didn't appear like he was in a rush to be beside you again.

"Optimus..." your voice was low. Trying to hide the excitement within your tone.

"My deepest sympathies for your home." His soothing tone washed away the doubt and worries, that had been building up inside you. "And for leaving you so promptly. But I had to confirm we weren't followed."

You speechlessly nodded, trying to hold a relaxed expression as your eyes took in the sight of him.

Oh my...

Rust and dirt no longer coated his exterior, instead deep blue metal plates framed his chrome fisque, like pieces of armour. Your heart skipping a beat as your eyes wandered over him, taking in every detail of his broad shoulders and strong biceps.

Red flames danced across the gauntlets, but it was his torso you couldn't look away from. Your cheeks matched the warmth of Optimus' spark, as you gazed at his chest plate. Hands clutching onto your shirt, stopping the urge to reach out and run your fingertips over his toned form. Knowing that your touch wouldn't just stopped at that chromed waist of his.

"Loving the upgrade." Forcing the words out of your mouth, after swallowing your nerves.

Optimus got down on one knee, as you edged a little closer to the side of the roof. His blue optics studied you for a moment.

"You've been crying..."

Something inside him ached a little, as you temporarily turned away from him.

"It's nothing." You assured, brushing the dried tears off your cheeks. "I've just been... a little worried that's all."

"And I admittedly have been concerned about you."

That little sentence erupted butterflies in your stomach. Simply gazing up at him with wondering eyes.

How the stars sparkled in your eyes almost caused Optimus to choke on his own breath. Warmth begun to build beneath his metal plates, as his yearning spark called out for you.

His head tilted slightly as his scanners picked up something. Your body froze as he slightly hesitated before reaching out to you. Optimus' servo curled into a relaxed fist, your eyes peering down at it as he gently placed the knuckle of his index digit under your chin. While his thumb rested against your cheek.

His spark skipped a beat as a loving sigh slipped out of your mouth. Enjoying the cool touch of his metal against your soft skin.

Optimus carefully turned your head from side to side, studying your features. His scanners picking up the bruise that begun to form upon the bridge of your nose.

"That bastard hurt you." The small underlying anger within his tone caught you off guard. "I promise... I'll make him pay for what he's done to you."

"Optimus." You cooed, placing your hand on the back of his servo. Bringing it to the side of your face, resting your head against his digits.

His fans tried to push the warm air out of Optimus' vents, as the heat beneath his plates begun to build. His spark aching with a yearn he could no longer deny.

Closer... The word played on his processors. Causing him to fully kneel against the concrete ground, leaning in a little more.

Your loving eyes met the soft glow of his optics, as his servo slowly trailed down towards your waist. His thumb tracing the curves of your thighs, hips and waist.

The butterflies in your stomach tangled your nerves, your heart fluttering against your chest as a small gasp slipped from your lips. Eyes lingering over his features before closing, as you rested a hand against his chest plate.

As your heart matched the beat of Optimus' spark, syncing in harmony. A beautiful glow enveloped the pair of you, creating a warmth that made you almost forget about the world, as your lips ghosted over one another.

"Mr. Leader of the Free Galaxy is back!" an unknown mechanical voice caused you to quickly jump away from Optimus. "I knew you'd make it! I never doubted."

Crosshairs... Optimus' processors sighed. Trying to hide his disappointed expression as the leader faced his joyful Autobots. The sound of their roaring engines calming, before stepping out of their altmodes.

"We've got your warning." Drift greeted, "we've been waiting."

"Hell yeah! Boom time!" Hound cheered. "We've got the gang back together."

Drift tilted his head to the side, as his blue optics switched between you and Optimus. Smiling to himself as his processors picked up, the afterglow that slowly faded from the pair of you.

Optimus cleared his throat before speaking, "Autobots. The humans have asked us to play by their rules. Well... those rules have just changed."

"Humans, bunch of backstabbing weasels." Hound groaned, causing the ground to shake as he disarmed. Throwing heavy weaponries onto the floor.

"Hound, find your inner compass. Loyalty is nothing but a flower in the winds of fear and temptation."

Hound raised a brow at Drift's wise tone, "what the hell are you saying?"

The blue Autobot smiled, "it's a haiku-"

"Cut the crap! Before I drop a grenade down your throat."

You backed away from the edge of the roof, as Drift unsheathed his swords. "Try it" he challenged, "you'll be dead."

"Oh please do it." Hound taunted. "I wanna see you do it."

"You know what?" Bumblebee's radio buzzed, "it save us so much time."

Optimus gave you an unimpressed expression, as you gazed up at him, raising an eyebrow. A small chuckle left you as he speechlessly gestured to his Autobots. As to say, 'look what I have to put up with.'

"Well raise your hand, if you're thoroughly disenchanted with our little 'Earth vacation.'" Crosshairs spoke, while circling the petrol station. His green optics studying you, "so who's the spy?"

"Whoa! Whoa! Put those things away!" you yelped as Hound and Crosshairs immediately withdraw their guns, and pointing them at you.

"Stop, Hound! Both of you!" Optimus commanded, stepping in front of the building.

Both Autobots gave their leader a puzzled expression, as he continued. "Y/N, risked her life for mine. We owe her..."

Drift gave Bumblebee a playful nudge, discreetly pointing at you and Optimus. While Hound and Crosshairs briefly looked at one another, and turning their attention back onto their leader. Watching him stepping aside, and silently encouraging you to return to the roof's edge.

"Has there been... any sign of the others?" Optimus asked.

"No..." Hound sighed, withdrawing his weapon and settling himself upon the ground. "We're all that's left."

"They're picking us off, one by one!" Crosshairs explained.

"We're the pathetic, dirty foursome." Hound joked, "and you make five."

"Is this our best-case scenario?" Shane's teasing voice questioned you. Your eyes gazed at him, watching the Irishman climb onto the roof. "Autobot witness protection?"

"Hey Lucky Charms." you spoke, placing a hand upon your hips. "You're welcome to leave at anytime."

"Well, for the record, Super Sister. I'm not hiding with you." Shane gestured towards Optimus, "I'm hiding out with that big guy."

Tessa and Cade followed Shane's lead, as the three of them approached your side. All looking at the Autobots and they chatted among themselves.

"Sensei, with your fate unknown Bumblebee has held command." Drift's optics gazed at the yellow scout.

Bee fist bumped the air, while Drift rolled his optics. "Despite his complete and total lack of anything resembling warrior discipline."

An annoyed whirl weeze out of Bumblebee, as his optics narrowed on his comrade.

"He's like a child-"

"This 'child' is about to kick your ass!" Bee's radio buzzed. Landing the first hit against Drift's helm.

"Cage fight." Hound whispered to you, slightly leaning against the petrol stations' roof.

"What's the matter with them?" Tessa lowly asked, reaching out for your hand.

"They're on edge." You briefly explained, allowing her hand to slip into yours. "Who could blame them? They're being hunted."

"Am I the only one who sees through this puppy-dog act of yours?" Drift taunted Bee, while holding him in a headlock. "It's beneath you."

"Yes, I've been waiting for them all to dispatch each other." Crosshairs cheered. His servos gently clapping, "so I could take charge with no trouble at all. Just me. Reporting to me."

"Well, it sure looks like you've been missed." You said to Optimus.

"Autobots, humans are hunting us down. We need to know why."

"Listen..." Cade spoke, stepping towards Optimus. "I don't know why, but I might have an idea about who..."

---

"This drone I stole recorded footage of an Autobot raid." Cade explained.

You placed an affectionate hand upon Optimus' knee, as he sat cross-legged upon the floor. His servo clenching into a fist, as the dragonfly-like drone projected the video footage.

"It's in pieces, but watch what happens here." Cade pointed out, "they ripping them apart."

"That's Leadfoot." Hound spoke, as he placed a part of his helm over his spark. Feeling the saddened energy sink within his chest plates. "Savages."

"And later, this truck comes to haul him off to K.S.I. Kinetic Solutions." Cade continued. "They're creating defenses, aerospace, government contracts. They designed this drone."

"So these government guys are hunting you down, and then passing you of to this K.S.I?" Shane questioned.

"Do you know anything else?" Optimus asked.

"Only that their company headquarters is in Chicago." Cade spoke.

Perhaps... There's a chance of the Autobots being taken there. You thought.

"No way to get inside without a battle." Hound thought out loud.

"What if you had some human help?" everyone looked at you.

"Sweetie, no." Cade protested. "Besides, what are you two partners now?"

"Dad, we're targets now too." You spoke, feeling his worried stare on you. "We need to know why, or we'll never get our lives back."

"Y/N. You have done more than any of us could've asked for." Optimus kindly spoke. "I do not-"

"I'm coming." You gently argued. Seeing Tessa's encouraging smile from the corner of your eye.

"It's going to be dangerous." Drift warned, as he lend towards you.

The blue Autobot stiffed as you placed a comforting hand upon his knee. Giving him a warm smile, "you're important Optimus. Therefore, you're important to me.

A suttle warmth radiated from underneath Drift's metal plates.

"Autobots." Optimus spoke, as he raised onto his feet. "I have sworn to never kill humans."

"Big mistake." Hound mumbled

"But when I find out who's behind this. He's going to die..."

Tag List

@ursamajor17

@crowleysthings

#x reader #fanfic writing #bayverse x reader #transformers x reader #optimus prime x you #optimus prime x reader #f!reader #bayverse transformers #transformers fanfiction #optimus x reader #optimus prime #fanfiction #gardens light

542 notes · View notes

hangesdarling · 2 months

Note

Could you make hange x female reader enemies to lovers with Hange teasing her later

tease — h. zoë

PAIRING. Hange Zoë x female reader SYNOPSIS. You always find yourself in dissent with the Survey Corps Squad Leader, Hange. CONTENT. 18+, MDNI, vaginal fingering, implied sex, teasing, your usual enemies-to-lovers thing, i suppose WORD COUNT. 1.9k A/N. playful hange, my beloved <33

The Survey Corps always clashes with the Military Police Brigade in some way or another. The factions never seemed to have a moment where silent resentment didn't boil over. After being given a chance to choose a regiment, you never considered being part of the Survey Corps. Only the bravest or the craziest or the ones with no choice ends up with that fate. You're meant for the inner walls, to fulfill a duty within where you won't have to risk your life in a slim chance that a titan won't devour you in a battle.

You never lifted an eye for those in that regiment, but interesting news always comes up now and then. Not just the newspapers or whispers from other soldiers. You couldn't deny that every time the regiment goes outside the wall, a heavy tone sets in.

Deaths, corpses, and grieving families. You were too caught up with the fact that you never had to deal with such gruesome things until the fall of Shiganshina.

Military Police began to work closely at times with the Garrison Regiment and the Survey Corps, who had a more appreciated role around this time. A clash between the regiment members occurs now and then, especially you and that crazy Survey Corps Squad Leader who has a propensity for grabbing people's collars.

Maybe you were annoyed at their temper, or how their reckless-sounding plans always turned up effective somehow which would never work out according to the Military Police Brigade's principle. It's way too different.

However, a sudden shift in your relationship occurred when you decided to be snarky one time.

Hange's hand clenched around your collar in a rather strong grip, and honestly, you forgot how you both ended up arguing to that extent. Your face was centimeters away from theirs as you smirked, "You know if you want an excuse to touch me so bad, there are better ways other than grabbing my collar. You could just say so, for example."

"Oh, get over yourself, L/N," Hange huffed, letting go of you. "As if I'd want to do that."

Your subordinates have told you that Hange gets pissed off at the right things and their anger is something to be feared. But it always brings you satisfaction when their cheeks or the tips of their ears redden when they are annoyed. It's cute, you must admit.

"Awww, is the Squad Leader blushing?" you crossed your arms, grinning.

Hange gave you a bright sarcastic smile and responded, "You make the blood vessels on my face dilate and it makes me want to rip your head off, darling."

"See, you're smitten," you chuckled.

Hange huffed this time, deciding it was over messing with you, and headed for the door. "Whatever. Go back to work."

"Hey, you can't command me like that. We're in the same rank!" Your indignant response made Hange smirk but they'll never show you that.

Maybe you don't have intentions to get close to them in a way where they'd piss you off in return first and have their fingers buried inside you the next in a cramped storage room.

"Shhh, quiet down, Y/N... Do you want the others to hear you? You're into that, huh?" Hange smirked, lips grazing the shell of your ear, making sure that every thrust of their digits was deep enough that their knuckles brushed against your folds.

"You might like trying to shut up for once. It looks good on you," you managed to say.

"Do you think I'd have such a pretty MP officer on my lap right now if it weren't for my insufferable, talkative mouth?"

"You know what? I'll bring a gag next time. That'll shut you up."

"And here I thought you can't get any kinkier." Hange playfully bit on your neck, relishing at the sounds you made that were soon muffled by their hand over your mouth.

You mewled and whimpered under their touch, any sense of decorum and authority thrown out of the window. The stuffy air inside the room didn't matter nor did the lack of a window, you drew a breath, head resting on their neck where you could inhale their scent. They remind you of fresh grass and perfume powders from your childhood.

Hange's hand would cradle your head to their chest in every silent intimacy shared in that room, their other hand rubbing circles on your hip in waiting for your highs to subside.

"This won't be a regular thing," you would say but both of you knew it was a lie uttered in an attempt to deny yourself more. Your meetings couldn't stand as infrequent when each day was a reminder that you would see each other again. Every time you stripped off your clothes, you would see every kiss mark and love bite from Hange etched on your skin. Hange knew you wouldn't admit your surreptitious desires even at gunpoint, and that only urged them to rib at the persona you clothed yourself with. A game of who would cave in first.

Some things could only be investigated in proper light when the sky gets dark. With intuition as sharp as Hange's, Erwin knew it would be best to trust investigations to them. From regiment treachery to pilferage that wears away the system, Hange finds the most relevant information in the obscure.

Streets weren't as busy on weekend nights. The village takes rest on those few hours when families are too busy lounging at home to notice dubious operations outside. Hange crept into the darkness, each gray shadow turning a shade darker by their lamplight. Their eyes crossed over the scroll containing all the points that led them here, the gears in their head turning about how they could fully unearth the mystery.

But then, alertness spiked in their veins the moment they heard sharp scurrying footsteps and hasty shadows running in their direction. Their usual calmness escaped them when the shadow held their arms, but their fighting instincts shut down when they heard, "Hange, it's me..."

Hange regained their composure when they saw your face by their lamplight, your chest rose and sank, making Hange wonder how long you've been running. They were taking a clear look at you, eyes momentarily traveling over the scrape on your cheek, and your frantic eyes looking from the direction you came from. But before Hange could utter a question, you abruptly put their lamplight down, quite aggressively that it was almost knocked off from Hange's hands if it weren't for their grip.

Hange felt your finger pressed against their lips as they heard you once more.

"Shut the hell up," you muttered, both in desperation and command and also by the knowledge that Hange was seconds away from running their mouth.

"I haven't said anything," Hange mumbled back.

"Shhhh..." you hissed as voices became audible from the direction you ran from. "They're coming so be quiet.”

Hange couldn't see much from the darkness but their hands knew where your hips were by touch. Their hands settled around them as they asked, "Who's coming?"

You couldn't find the heart to tell Hange that you were spying on fellow Military Police officers to gain evidence of their corruption both in trade and land. People might have coupled you to the elite, high, and mighty commanding rank of the brigade but you're not a filthy traitor of humanity unlike what those other MP officers subjected themselves to.

"I got in trouble," is all you said, your tone unwelcoming to any further questions Hange might ask. You would answer them some time but not now. Not when all the truth you could tell only punctuates that you belong in a rotten, grimy-handed faction.

The footsteps drew close, the familiar sound of an unholstering gun, and a voice posing seniority along with the other two. Hange wasn't a fool and knew they were Military Police officers as well. Their eyes peeked beyond the alleyway, calculating that both of you had nowhere to run at this point but a direction towards danger. No safe options, in short.

Hange turned back to you, eyes grazing at the outline of your figure.

"You know we could be pretending to make out instead of huddling together like a bunch of cows in summer," they proposed, fingers lightly tapping your hip in suppressed nervousness. It was a laughable proposal in a certain context, but it wasn't a terrible one.

"Ugh, what a pervert," you mumbled to yourself, running the idea in your mind in consideration and at the same time cursing yourself for being flustered at such an unlikely time.

"What! I'm just trying to save your li–" Hange would like to offer more protests but your lips crashing against theirs suspended their words, even the thoughts whirling in their head.

They kneaded your hip beneath their hands, teasing the edge where your shirt ended and skirt began. Hange brushed their tongue softly against yours, reveling upon the taste of your mouth they longed to lay claim upon.

The officers only needed a glimpse of your vague outlines moving sensually in that dim alleyway to know what was going on. Unsuspectingly and half-pissed, they only passed by, remembering their authority at the last minute when one of the older men shouted, "Trysting bastards, get a damn room!"

Hange couldn't help but emit a soft laugh as they gently pulled away from the kiss, just from the light shake of their shoulder you could measure how much they were struggling to keep their laughs in. A smile lifted on your lips to its own accord, jabbing at their sides as you say, "shut up, you idiot" despite smiling widely to yourself.

Hange could be persistent without sounding like one. They would nurse the scrapes on your cheeks and knees while nudging you to tell them what happened earlier. Your stories were lacking due to a desire to remain an arcane persona as protection but Hange has an aptitude to string your stories and read between what your words cannot say. You're a person of good intentions, they concluded, hoping their intuition served them right as usual. You spent the rest of the night with Hange, enclosed by both their arms and a blanket. They were not so willing to let you go when early dawn broke, but you gave them a kiss of gratitude, smirking as they blushed profusely. You gathered your clothes and dressed up before leaving, wishing that tomorrow you would see them again for another warm night.

Most inner operations ceased temporarily the day the Survey Corps will retake Wall Maria. You remained stationed in the inner walls, occasionally visiting your office to read through a few reports until a small envelope fell out of the stack you were checking. It was from Hange and they asked a subordinate to deliver it in by the looks of it. You tore the flap and read the small note:

To Y/N,

I'll try to visit you more often. I'm also hoping you'll have some spare time to come over to my place whenever I'm here.

P. S. You never returned my pen but it's yours now, I presume. I found something of interest you left at my place last week. It's inside the envelope.

From Hange

When you shook the envelope upside down, a small button rolled on your desk. It was one of the buttons from your uniform, embedded with the Military Police Brigade logo. You sighed and kept it in your pocket, the memory of why you left such a trinket in their place sinking in and transpiring into a blush on your cheeks. It was a rough night, to say the least.

You kept the letter tucked inside your coat, making a mental note to chastise Hange and tell them not to send such things in the mail even if they want to piss you off so badly.

likes, reblogs, and comments are appreciated, sweethearts <3

78 notes · View notes

prettykittycastle · 1 year

Text

She's just a fan

Summary: Frank doesn't like how much of a fan you are of Daredevil.

(The reader is AFAB and uses she/her pronouns. The ethnicity/race is preferably black.)

(Content Warning: Multiple orgasms, jealous!Frank, possessive!Frank, mention of Daredevil, dirty talk, doggystyle)

"Quit it," Frank told you for the third time that night, taking a hold of the back of your shirt and pulling on it, pulling you back to meet his thrusts.

"Frank," you whined, squeezing the bedsheets between your fingers and trying your hardest to not run from his dick again.

"Shut up," you heard him say before you felt the harsh slap he landed on your right ass cheek. "You like Red so much, say his fucking name."

"Please," you whimpered, feeling another orgasm quickly approaching. "I'm gonna cum again!"

"You gonna cum, huh? Whose dick you gonna cum on? Hmm?"

"Yours," you cried.

"Not Red's?"

"Yours, Frank, yours," you cried out before closing your eyes, letting out another cry as your orgasm soared through your body. The effects of your orgasm reached all the way from your core to your fingertips and your body began to slump forward onto the bed as Frank continued to fuck you through it.

"Fucking soaking me baby," Frank groaned, looking down at himself as he continued to go in and out of you. The feeling of your tight walls squeezing him made him slow his thrusts down, but he still held onto you, making sure you don't try to run from him again.

He was going to make sure you knew who you (and that pussy) belonged to and assure you that it was not and never will be Red or A.K.A. Daredevil.

Few hours before...

"Five gang members were delivered to the police station by none other than the Devil of Hell's Kitchen, or as some folks know him as Daredevil," the news woman reported. "Like many other times, the masked vigilante was only seen for a brief second outside the station before people nearby claimed to..."

You were getting ready for work when you heard the news about another criminal being stopped by Daredevil. Frank was just getting up, about to make himself breakfast when he heard the TV and found you standing in front of it, already wearing your work clothes, looking at the amatuer photo of Daredevil displayed on the TV screen with the news woman continuing the story in the background.

"What's up," he asked walking up behind you and giving you a quick kiss on your cheek.

The feel of his lips made you turn and look away from the handsome man on the TV and to the handsome man that was in your home.

"Daredevil caught some gang members and dropped them off at the police station before disappearing," you told him, can't help turning back to the TV to see that his photo was still on the screen, only that it was now shrunk to fit in the corner of it.

Raising his eyebrow, Frank couldn't help but notice the excitement and admiration that was in your voice when you spoke about the Devil of Hell's Kitchen. The very few times his existence was brought up in the past during conversations, that excitement and admiration was always present then.

He's a hero, she's just a fan, Frank reasoned. That's all...Right?

He noticed the way you were still looking at the TV and felt a spark of jealousy begin in him. No way, he thought. Not fucking Red.

"You're really invested in him," he said, inspecting your body language.

"Yeah, I guess I got a thing for vigilantes," you told him, looking over at him teasingly.

The small grin Frank made was one that was forced as he felt that jealous spark quickly grow to a small flame. You would have noticed how forced the grin was if you weren't paying so much attention to the photo.

"Didn't you fight him before?"

Your question made him clench his jaw in restrained anger at the fact that you were so interested in him.

"Yeah, a while ago. We're on, uh...neutral terms now."

"Did you ever...," you turned your eyes away from the screen and continued getting ready, gathering what you need and placing them in your bag, while trying to ask Frank your question. " see his face?"

"His face?" He clenched his jaw harder and tried to control his voice to not show his annoyance.

"Yeah. Did you ever, like, get the mask off and see his face?"

Even without Karen telling him who he was, Frank had been figured out who the man was behind the mask but kept it to himself out of respect.

"Uh, yeah," he replied, going to the kitchen and fixing himself a cup of coffee.

"What'd he look like?"

The question he was dreading. He wanted you to so badly stop talking about Red, but he was scared that if he voiced it, you would quickly pick up on his jealousy.

"You a fan of his, baby?" He hoped you wouldn't notice him avoiding the question.

"A little. A while back, he once stopped some guys from robbing me."

He furrowed his brow, remembering that you had spoken of seeing him in action once, but never getting the chance to thank him for saving you.

"I guess since then I might have started having a crush on him and maybe become a huge fan."

Asshole. While Frank was thankful that he saved you, he was still pissed off that the altar boy had a place in your heart, even if that place was small compared to his. The fact that it existed pissed him the fuck off.

"Shit, I gotta go," you grabbed your keys and your jacket and quickly made your way over to Frank to give him a goodbye kiss. "Love you."

"Love you, too," he told you, forcing his smile. He watched as you hurried and left and he instantly dropped the smile from his face.

Just a fan. Not like she wants to fuck him or nothing. But she was looking at that fucking picture for a long time.

Frank was a person who, while he did sometimes feel self-conscious about certain things, never actually experienced being insecure. Especially like this. Especially not because of an asshole like Red.

All day it stayed on his mind. How much you wanted to know about Daredevil and how you were such a fan of him drove him crazy. The second you walked through the door from work, Frank was instantly on you, ripping off your (pants or skirt), and quickly fucked you against the closed door. When you finally came, he didn't give you time to ask about his horny-ness and picked you up and carried you to the bedroom where he threw you down on the bed, turned you on your hands and knees, and went back to fucking you.

Now...

"Whose is it," Frank pulling on your shirt harder. Once he felt that your orgasm was ending, he quickened his thrusts again, hitting your G-spot over and over again determined to have you cum again for him.

"Yours," you cried, your legs beginning to shake from the combined effort of holding your body up and the overwhelming pleasure Frank was giving you.

"This pussy belongs to me?" He kept hold of your shirt and grabbed your hip, pulling you against him more.

"Yes," you gasped, the constant fire inside you spread through your body without warning and suddenly your mind was hazed over and the pleasure was too good. So good that you could hardly speak.

"Good girl," he moaned, finally stopped thrusting, feeling your walls squeeze his dick, more of your juices covering him.

The haze over your mind lasted for what felt like minutes, but were really seconds. The fire in your body was still there, but lessened and feeling that Frank had stopped thrusting, you tried to gather the strength you had left in you and try to crawl forward, away from him, specifically his dick.

Taking deep breaths, Frank watched in amusement as you crawled or attempted to crawl away from him. He let you get a few inches away, and finally when he saw that you had gotten far enough that only his tip was in you, decided to reign you back in.

"Where you going," he asked, gently pulling on your shirt. You had forgotten that he was holding it. "Bring my pussy back."

"Please, Frankie," you whined, looking over your shoulder to him, trying to ease his tip out of you, but he wouldn't let you. "Why?"

"You talk bout Red like you want him," he growled out, slowly pushing the rest of his length back into you.

"Aaah!" You screamed, not wanting to, but feeling the fire begin back inside you. "I don't want him. I swear."

"Mmm," he hummed, pushing the rest of his self into you, his tip going straight for your G-spot, causing you to cry out as the fire grew more intense.

"I won't talk about him ever again," you gasped as Frank started back fucking you. Your arms couldn't hold yourself up anymore and you let yourself fall flat on the bed, your ass remaining in the air as Frank continued to fuck you. "I promise I won't bring him up again. Baby, I swear I won't."

"I know you won't," he murmured, feeling your tight, but slick walls squeezing him tighter and tighter with each thrust. "My good girl knows she's mine." His thrusts were beginning to lose their rhythm and was now becoming rushed and you knew that he was close to cumming.

Just like him, you were close to cumming again and you let out little whimpers as he kept hitting your G-spot more and more.

"Where you want it, good girl," he asked, his hips slamming against your asscheeks over and over, making them sore.

It took you a second to answer as the fire inside you quickly became hotter and hotter. "Inside me. Please, Frank."

It only took one more thrust, his tip hitting your G-spot one last time, for you to cum for the last time, but when you did, it felt as if everything around you was suddenly gone and the air was knocked out of your lungs. Your pussy squeezed him so tight and you creamed around him so much that Frank couldn't control himself and he quickly stopped thrusting and came inside you, his thick, hot cum filling you up even more.

"Damn," he groaned, looking down at the amount of cream you left on him. My little creamer, he affectionately called you in his head.

Pulling himself out, he let out deep groan at the sight of some of his cum, slowly dripping out of you.

"(Y/N)," he turned you over and laid you on your side to see that you were trying to catch your breath and regain control of your limbs while your body was still reeling from your orgasm.

"I'll get you some water, okay," he told you, leaning down and gently laying a kiss upon your forehead. "After you're done drinking, I'll run you a bath." He pulled away, got off the bed, and left the room to go get your water and begin preparing your bathwater.

The first thing you saw when you opened your eyes from your deep sleep was the puppy dog eyes of your Frank. He was laying on his side, looking at you with a peaceful smile, but his eyes looked guilty.

"Hey," you leaned forward and gave him a kiss, which he gladly reciprocated. "Why you look like that?"

"Like what?"

"Guilty," you answered. You suddenly felt the need to pee and pulled the covers back, ready to sit up, but stopped. You frowned as you felt how sore your pussy was and your legs were also sore and heavy. "Shit."

"I might've been a little rough last night," he said, looking sheepish, but you could tell from the blush in his cheeks that he was also a little proud of himself. "Sorry bout that."

"S'fine."

He shook his head and furrowed his brows at you, his guilt now showing on his face. "I shouldn't have been jealous about Red like that. I know you'd never want that asshole."

"It's okay, Frank. I shouldn't be fangirling over him so much. I already have my hero right here."

Your words did exactly what you hoped they would and you smiled as Frank began to blush even harder.

"I already called your job and told them you weren't feeling good today. Whatever you need, let me know. I'll do it for you."

"Can you pick me up and take me to the bathroom, please?"

A proud smile spread across his face and he happily leaped out of bed and made his way over to your side. "Whatever you want, your highness."

984 notes · View notes

sage-green-matcha · 9 months

Text

RETRIBUTION - ZACH TURNER 💣

Content Includes: Mentions of blood, violence, bombs, guns, more blood, spoilers for the movie “Retribution”

A/n: My first time writing for Zach! We don’t really know much about him butttt I tried my best! Hope you guys enjoy :)

Your face was covered in shock as you watched Zach's father hold out a gun. You were already scared, the fact that there was a bomb in the car made you feel sick to your stomach.

You really thought it would be a normal day, but you had seen 3 people die in one morning.

You watched as Zach and Emily's mom was taken by the police, teams of police officers chasing down the car that you were inside of.

You had no clue what was going on, and it stressed you out knowing you couldn't do anything about it.

"I'm sorry Y/n, I'm so sorry sweetheart. You shouldn't be here right now" Matt mumbled with a shaky voice.

You could tell just from that, that were tears forming in his eyes.

"Dad... Dad don't do this!" Zach's eyebrows were furrowed, his body shaking slightly from his scared heartbeat.

"Dad don't" Emily was breathing heavily next to Zach, his hand squeezing hers tightly.

"Dad don't! Listen, okay? He's your friend"

Your heart shattered with how frightened he sounded, but you couldn't speak. You were too scared. You usually loved the rush, but this felt disgusting and dangerous.

"God forgive me" The words that fell from Matts lips were unbelievable. There was no way he was about to kill his best friend. His long-time business partner.

You didn't know Matt very well. But you knew Matt and Anders well. They were always together at gatherings, drinking and joking around like they always did.

They would tease you and Zach about getting together, you knew it would never happen. But knowing they support your small delusion made you feel better.

"Matt! Let me go!" Anders looked terrified, the gun held up to his face didn't help it either.

"Dad! Dad! He's your friend! What are you doing?"

"Dad! Don't!" Emily was now clung onto Zach, tears forming in her eyes as she watched the horrific scene.

"I can't..."

You squeezed your eyes shut, expecting to see a mutilated body once you opened your eyes.

Except that didn't happen, instead your eyes were surprised at the train that rushed in front of them. Your hearing was interrupted by the loud sound of screeching metal and a loud horn.

Heavy breathing filled the car, a harsh swallow falling down your throat.

You thought you were safe, for a split second. But everything happened so fast.

Wood and glass exploded throughout the car, bullets breaking through the metal doors of the car.

A powerful cloud of smoke made you cover yourself, but instead of protecting yourself, you put your body in more danger.

The car shook before you could even look at the explosion next to you, pain covering your entire body.

Your breath scattered, looking at the bloody hole in your arm. It had all happened so fast. You felt a dart of pain and next thing you knew you were covered in blood.

"Are you okay?" Matt turned around, looking at his children before he even glanced over at you.

"Y/n? Y/n?"

A ball formed in your throat, the pain making your mouth explode with small cries.

"Shit! Shit! Y/n, Y/n! She's bleeding. She got shot!"

Your body fell cold, trying to control your breathing as blood soaked into you and Zach's clothing.

Painful whimpers fell from your mouth, feeling Zach's hand lift your arm.

"Shit"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry babe, I know it hurts."

He wrapped his dad's tie around your wound, It hurt but his words made you feel better. Your heart started beating faster, and you weren't sure if it was because of him or the shot through your arm.

"Tie it tight, Zach"

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" You ought to think he was the one who shot you with how much he was apologizing.

You yelped at the pressure being put on your limb. Blood soaked through the cloth quickly and you felt sick.

"Hang on Y/n, Hang on. We're gonna get you some help" You gulped at Matt's words, your head falling onto Zach's chest.

He held you tighter in real life than in your dreams. He didn't want to lose you, you were his person. He loved you, he needed you.

His hand was covered in your blood but he refused to let go. The warm liquid covered the seats and it stained his skin, but he didn’t care.

It felt like forever before the police started to chase the car, Anxiety no longer took over your head, it just felt empty and painful.

Your vision blurred, noises and words becoming quieter and mumbled.

The car finally came to a stop, Zach holding onto your hand tightly.

"Are you okay?" A lady came up to the car, looking through the broken windows.

"She's hurt, please. She's lost a lot of blood. We need help" They didn’t believe Matt, but once she saw the bloody seats she had no choice.

"How are you, sweetheart?" Her face was serious when you asked, making you question her sanity.

"Are you serious? I'm dying" She could read your face, yet you couldn't read hers.

All you wanted was for the pain to go away, to get out of the car and feel better.

But you couldn't. The bomb made it impossible to leave.

"There are no bombs under the children's seats. We're taking off the car doors now"

They unscrewed the ruined car doors, a man reaching over your seatbelt before unbuckling it.

"Zach..." He gulped with glossy eyes as he realized he was still holding onto your hand.

"Is he your boyfriend?" The anticlimactic lady asked and you just shrugged, Zach giving you a small smile.

You were taken to an ambulance, Zach and Emily following not long after.

"You lost a lot of blood, but you'll be fine"

As if that would make you feel any better. You laid lazily on the stretcher, Thankfully the bullet wasn't stuck in your arm, so no surgery was needed.

Instead, you zoned out on anesthesia, stitches being sewn into your arm.

For some odd reason, you weren't allowed to leave the crime scene. So Heather accompanied you in the back of the ambulance.

"They called your mom again, I'm sorry sweetheart. How do you feel? Are you okay? Do you need anything?"

Her motherly instincts brought you comfort, something yours didn't have. She wasn't even in town, which was why Matt had to take you to school.

But you weren't at school, yet you didn't think your mom would even care to ask you about the accident. 30 minutes had passed and she didn't even care to call, they had to call her again.

"He's taking off, Mrs. Turner" Your heart felt empty as she ran off to get her husband, Zach, and Emily running Into the ambulance.

"Y/n, are you okay? How do you feel? What did they do?" Zach's voice was fast, making you smile up at him.

"I'm fine Zach, they just gave me some stitches. Are you guys okay?" Emily tried to smile as she nodded, but Zach could only focus on you.

"Emily, leave"

"What? Why? Are you gonna kiss Y/n?"

You smiled as they fought, even after the most traumatic experience of their lives they still bickered.

"Please, Emily?" She huffed before standing outside the ambulance.

"Sorry about your shirt" You mumbled. It was dyed with the color of your blood, a dark red covering the grey fabric.

"It's fine..."

He looked nervous as he went to hold your hand, reaching out before pulling back.

"Hey, it's okay. We're alive" You took it upon yourself to take his hand, his warmth giving you comfort.

"I know...but my dad"

You frowned, letting out a small sigh before readjusting yourself to be sat up.

"Careful, be careful"

"I'm fine Zach, chill" You smiled while looking up at him, his eyes basically drilling holes into yours.

He didn't get how after all of that you still managed to look so beautiful. Your hair was messy and your skin was covered in blood, but you still looked pretty.

"I look ugly, I know" He furrowed his eyebrows before shaking his head, opening his mouth before hesitating.

“You look beautiful…even covered in blood” He scoffed as butterflies exploded in your stomach.

You didn’t want him to notice how your face lit up with every pet name and compliment, but he did.

“This is a really bad time for this but, I need to tell you”

“What is it? You can talk to me” You gave his hand a small squeeze, pulling it closer to your body.

“When I saw you bleed I really thought you were gonna die. And I wanted to tell you this in case you did…”

You furrowed your eyebrows at his words as he continued to speak. The words that fell from his lips leaving you in shock.

“I love you. I don’t know what It feels like but I think I feel it for you. And I wouldn’t want anything this horrible to ever happen to you again.”

You felt yourself melt at his sweet words. But as he rambled you smiled to yourself, pulling his arm closer towards you.

“I get it Zach, I love you too”

His smile brightened your face, a soft kiss being placed on your lips before Em’s squeal interrupted the moment.

“I knew you two liked each other!”

“Em! Shut up!”

212 notes · View notes