A Snow Angel and a Substitute

Kristanna Modern AU Rated: T+ WC: 7122

~Completely self indulgent oneshot

--------------

“Yo, Mr. B!”

Kristoff turned around right as the snowball exploded against his shoulder.  His eyes narrowed at the three teenage boys who were busting a gut laughing.

“Get your asses to class!” he yelled, a smirk pulling at the side of his mouth as he brushed the snow off his jacket.

The boys grinned at him and took off running through the deep snow.  Kristoff shook his head and resumed his work with the shovel.  It was a crying shame their rural school never got the walks cleared in the morning in time, forcing parents and children to navigate the blinding white landscape.  He’d seen his fair share of people slip and fall, not to mention that one time he took a tumble on the way to his truck after school. 

More students filed off the buses, stepping around him as he resumed shoveling the snow.  It was a long walkway along the front of the school to the bus loop, and he was going to have to hurry back inside to make it in time for the second bell to teach his class.

*****

“There he goes again.”

Anna looked up from where she was sitting at one of the tables in the staff break room.  There were four other teachers, all ladies, looking out the window at someone.   This was a new school for her and her first time substituting at it; if she knew the other teachers better, she might go see that the commotion was about.

“He’s such an angel for doing that,” one of them said.

“Every time it snows.  And he always has a smile on his face,” the first one who spoke answered.

“If I wasn’t married, I would be all over him,” another woman said through a dreamy sigh. 

“Ha.  Get in line.  Almost all of us single ladies have already tried and failed to get a date.”

Anna had no idea what they were talking about but curiosity got the better of her and she got up and approached the window.  Outside was a tall man, his blond hair decorated with snowflakes, shoveling the walkways around the school.

The one who spoke first turned slightly, noticing Anna’s presence.  “Oh, you’re Miss Arendelle, right?  The sub for Mrs. Gleeman’s class?”

“That’s me.”  She smiled.  “I’m Anna.”

“I’m Tracy.  Welcome to the school.”  She offered her hand and Anna shook it.  “You get a good look at Mr. B out there?”

“Mr. B?” Anna asked.

Tracy gave her a wicked smile.  “Mr. Kristoff Bjorgman.  He teaches science in the junior high wing.  You’ll see once you meet him.”

Anna was certainly intrigued.  She imagined she’d have a chance to bump into him since she was taking over the Junior High’s English period in the same wing for the entire month while Mrs. Gleeman recovered from knee surgery.    

The rest of the teachers introduced themselves and Anna found them all to be warm and inviting.  They included her in their conversation about the goings-on of the school until the first bell rang and all the women broke up to head to their classrooms. 

Anna headed to the classroom that the principal had shown her when she’d arrived, and turned the corner to come face to face with a very snow-covered blond man whom she’d been looking at only moments before.

“Oh, hello…” he said, shaking snow off his hair and then brushing it off the shoulders of his coat.  “You must be subbing for Mrs. G.”

Anna was immediately enamored with the pink hue of his cheeks from being out in the cold and exerting himself with the shovel.  “I am,” she said with a smile.  “My name is Anna.”

“Kristoff,” he said, and offered a hand.  “Kids call me Mr. B.”

Anna shook it, expecting it to be cold, but instead it was delightfully warm.  “Nice to meet you, Kristoff.”

He gave her a tiny smile.  “Have a good morning.”  Then he walked around her and straight to the classroom beside hers. 

Anna paused at the door to her classroom and took a deep breath.  It was always nerve-racking teaching in a new school she wasn’t familiar with, and grade seven was by far the most ruthless grade she’d ever taught for.  With any luck, she’d get through the day without having a nervous breakdown.

-----

So far, the morning had gone off without too much issue.  There were some rowdy boys in the class to be sure, but none of them did anything too rash beyond talking when they weren’t supposed to be.  The biggest distraction of the morning happened when the classroom next to theirs erupted with noise.

Her students had been reading quietly to prepare for the book report they were going to do on their chosen book, when there was a whooshing sound, a class full of teenagers oohing and ahhing, and then ruckus laughter.  It filtered through the wall with remarkable clarity.

“I can’t wait for science,” whispered one of the boys in the back to his friend. 

“Me either,” his friend responded.  “Mr. B is the best!”

That brought hushed murmurs of agreement from other students and within seconds they were all talking.  Anna looked at the clock, and with only five minutes left in the period, she figured she’d let them be.  In the meantime, she took the opportunity to look up this Mr. B on line, only to find that he had no presence there beyond being listed as a teacher on the school’s website.

The bell rang and the kids filed out to head to their next class.  Not long after the grade eights filed in, talking and laughing.  Anna had read over their curriculum and was prepared.  That class went a little quicker since they were discussing their upcoming biography projects and Anna had to answer a lot of questions before the bell rang for lunch. 

Anna lingered a moment to gather her notes for the grade nine’s she would be teaching after lunch, then grabbed her bag and headed for the staff room.  Walking passed Mr. B’s classroom, she noticed him out of the corner of her eye.  Pausing, she turned towards the open door and leaned against the frame.

“Do all the teachers eat lunch in their classrooms?”

His head remained still but his eyes looked up from the book he was reading, a sandwich paused half way to his mouth in his other hand.  He blinked at her and finally brough his head up, setting his lunch down.  “Um, no.  But I do.”

“Oh?” Anna cocked her head to the side.  “Is everyone here that insufferable?”

A smirk played out on his lips and he set his book down, looking away from her eyes.  “No, nothing like that.  I just like peace and quiet.”

Anna nodded slowly.  “I get it.  Sometimes I need a breather from all the talking and listening to the students.”

Kristoff looked back and smiled at her but didn’t look like he was going to say anything in response, so Anna told him to have a good lunch and headed to the staff room.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Kristoff was out there again the next morning, shoveling the snow that had fallen overnight.  The school district crews had been there in the afternoon to clear the accumulation from the day, but everything was once again under a blanket of snow.

Anna walked into the staff room to a nearly identical scene from the morning before, only this time where were five other female teachers lined up at the window.  She didn’t bother to join them since it seemed a little juvenile.  Not that she didn’t understand; he truly was a very handsome man, but why bother ogling when he wasn’t interested.  Anna certainly would have joined him if he’d offered her to eat lunch with him yesterday.  Only he hadn’t, so it was fair to assume there was no interest for her either.

She put her lunch in the fridge and headed to her classroom.  There were already a few students milling around in it, and she got everything set up for the day.  Then the junior high door opened and shut and the sound of someone stomping boots on the mat came down the hallway.  Kristoff breezed by her open door a moment later on his way to his classroom without sparing her so much as a glance. 

“Yo, Mr. B!” came through the wall a moment later, and the sound of kids bombarding him with comments and questions was drowned out by the second bell. 

The day progressed much like the day before, only with the other grade seven and eight classes.  Then the lunch bell rang and Anna headed to the staff room, glancing briefly in Kristoff’s classroom to find it empty.   As soon as she entered the staff area, she could see why.  He was digging around in the fridge, bent at the waist, with every single pair of female eyes staring at his wonderfully shaped back side.

Anna fought with a smile and the urge to break out with laughter.  These women were worse than love struck teenagers.

Kristoff pulled out a brown paper bag and shut the fridge as he turned in her direction.  He almost slammed right into her, and had to stumble back a step.  “Oh, sorry.  Didn’t mean to almost run you over.”

“No worries.”  Anna smiled at him.

The side of his mouth curved up in response but he walked around her and said, “Have a good lunch.”

“You too,” Anna said to his back as he left the room.

Silence stretched on for a moment when Tracy piped up.  “He is so fine.”

A male teacher sitting at a table guffawed at her comment.  “Put it back in your pants, you cougar.  He ain’t interested.”

“I know that,” she snapped at him.  “Doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate that fine form.  Not to mention that perfect ass.”

Some of the ladies in the room giggled while the male teacher rolled his eyes with comedic drama that told her the ribbing was all in good fun.   Anna turned away from the group and grabbed her lunch and found a spot to eat while conversations turned away from the attractiveness of co-workers.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Kristoff never had to shovel the next morning, which disappointed him just a little.  He liked doing it, getting out in the cold fresh air and making life a little better for the parents and students.  One of the gym teachers used to do it, but the guy only shoveled the entryway to the front doors, so when Kristoff got to the shovel before him one morning, he never made a move to grab it again.  It was for the better.  This way the entre walkway was free and clear of deep snow, and Kristoff always got the de-icer to sprinkle if there was ice left on the walks. 

One of the good things about not having to shovel at least was not seeing a bunch of faces staring at him from the window of the staff room.  Some of those ladies were relentless. 

At least it was hump-day and Kristoff was excited to dazzle the kids with another experiment.  He put his lunch in the fridge, ignoring the stares, and went to his classroom to organize his day.  As the kids filtered in, he was greeted warmly. 

He tried not to listen to much of what they were saying, especially when he heard a swear word or two fall out of their mouths, but one of the boys talking caught his attention when he mentioned ‘Miss A’.

“… is so awesome.  She’s so chill.  I like her.”

“Dude, she’s hot!”

“Jackson!” Kristoff warned, not bringing his eyes up from the quiz he was grading.  “Inappropriate.”

“Sorry, Mr. B,” Jackson responded sheepishly. 

Kristoff went back to his work.  He understood these kids had hormones fucking up their brains at this age.  Hell, he’d received googly eyes from plenty of the girls over his years teaching.  It was natural for them to feel those feelings.  And of course, not one of them ever acted on them.  Which sadly, couldn’t be said for all teachers.

He’d worked with a guy before who’d crossed the line with one of his students.  Kristoff laid him out with one punch when he found out, and got him fired on the spot.  The girl was consenting and technically eighteen, but it was still so fucking wrong.  

He saw a flash of colour scurry past his open door and met Anna’s eyes for one brief second as she hurried down the hall.  Kristoff stared at nothing for a moment, regretting not thinking of something better to say to her when she’d stopped by his classroom that first day.  Truth is, she was hot.  And he was instantly captivated by her eyes and her easygoing smile. 

The noise level in the room was getting out of hand so Kristoff had to rein in the students and begin class.  The morning flew by, and before he knew it, the lunch bell was ringing and he was swiftly left alone in his classroom.  He hurried to grab his lunch and managed to get out before too many people came in, and was once again alone in the solitude of his classroom a moment later.

Mid way through unpacking his sandwiches, a familiar voice came from his open door. 

“How do you do it?” she asked. 

Kristoff looked at her, those clear blue, intelligent, eyes, and felt a jolt of longing.  He hadn’t really ever felt an attraction like this before, and it went well beyond her looks. 

“How do I do what?”

“Get them to love you so much,” she said with mock exasperation as she took a couple steps into the room and threw her hands up dramatically.  “Those kids adore you.”

He felt his cheeks warm instantly, and shrugged to her.  “I just like teaching science.”

She shook her head and crossed her arms over her chest.  “Nuh uh.  It’s more than that.  You have a natural talent for reaching these young people.  They look up to you, and they listen to you, and most importantly, they learn from you.”

The heat in his face deepened and he had no idea what to say.

She sighed.  “We all had those teachers growing up.  You remember, right?  The one, or if you’re lucky, two, that really make a difference.  The one’s that leave an impression.  You are one of those.  How do you do it?”

Kristoff was at a complete loss for words.  No one had ever said anything so flattering to him before.  He was further taken with her. 

“Well, I’ll leave you to it then.”  She uncrossed her arms and turned back towards the door.

He had a moment of panic, wanting this conversation to keep going only his mind was still drawing a blank.  She was almost out of sight when words finally came to him and came out with halting awkwardness.  “I don’t really know how… I just love science.”

She turned back and looked at him with curiosity.  “You really don’t have like, a secret, or something?”

He shook his head.  “No.  Not at all.  In fact, I’m actually a really quiet person.  I just… like talking about science.”

Anna stared at him, making him a little uncomfortable.  “So you’re basically a unicorn,” she said finally.

The absurdity of the statement made him laugh.  “What?”

She waved her hand in front of her face.  “Never mind.  Just means you’re a rare individual.”  Then she turned and disappeared out the door before he could utter another word. 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

He was tired as hell, and shoveling the dump of snow that had fallen overnight was hard work.  By the time he stomped his snow-covered boots on the mat and changed into his school sneakers, he was ready to call it a day and go home.  Only the day was only just starting. 

The reason he couldn’t sleep, appeared rushing to her classroom as he approached his door, and she threw him one of those breathtaking smiles as she passed him.

All morning, he struggled to concentrate, leaving his kids quietly passing silent glances at one another.  He finally had more than he could take and told them to just take out their textbooks and read over the material in their unit to study for the upcoming test next week.  While they silently worked, he stared at his computer and tried to make himself work. 

He almost dozed off and the bell ran, startling him, which was embarrassingly noticed by almost all of his students.  They filtered out of the class throwing him questioning glances and his next class sauntered in.  He managed to hold it together a bit better, then he looked at the clock, realized how much time was left, and told them to do the same as he did with his other class.

Miss A… Anna… was thoroughly under his skin.

By the time the lunch bell rang, it felt like eight hours had passed instead of four.  He went to the corner of his desk where he’d thrown his lunch bag when he came in.  He was too tired to put it in the fridge and he pulled the items out without really thinking about it and started to eat his first sandwich.

Then she was at his door again. 

“It’s noticeably quiet over here today.”

“Pardon?” he asked, his tired mind trying to understand.

“Your classes are kind of loud,” she said, walking into the room and right up to his desk.

He swallowed the sudden thickness in his throat and maintained eye contact with her.  “I’m sorry.  I don’t mean to be a disruption.”

She gave him a brilliant smile.  “That’s not what I’m saying.”  Anna grabbed a nearby student chair and pulled it towards his desk, sitting across from him.  “I just mean the kids seem a little less upbeat today.  And… so do you.”

Did that mean she had been watching him while he was shoveling?  Did she notice that his enthusiasm was not what it was at the beginning of the week?

“Just tired…” was all he could think of to say. 

She stared back at him with eyes that were more knowing than anyone else he’d ever met.  “I get it.  We all have those days.  That’s why the kids seem quiet.  They feed off your energy, and when you don’t have it, they worry.”

He frowned.  “You think they worry about me?”

“Of course they do!  That’s all I heard murmured when my next class came in.  They come straight from you to me.”

“They noticed,” he said more to himself than Anna as his gaze fell to his desk.  He was a little taken aback, as this had never really happened to him before.  Upon reflection, he supposed he was pretty constant with his attitude.  No wonder the kids were thrown off.

She nodded.  “Don’t worry, no one is saying anything bad.  Just that you look tired.”

He looked back into her eyes.  “Yeah, I am tired.”

“Why?”

Shit, if his tiredness was throwing his kids off, her question as to why certainty threw him off.   “Just a restless night,” he said carefully.

“That’s too bad.”  She frowned.  “Everything okay?  You need to talk about something?”

The fact that the reason he couldn’t sleep was asking him why, was amusing his tired brain.  “No, it’s all good.  Just couldn’t stop thinking.”

“Ah, I have those nights once in a while.”  She leaned back in the chair.  “Definitely no fun.”

He shook his head slowly, watching her eyes as they flicked to the clock and then back to his desk, before finally coming up and meeting his gaze.  It was all over her face; she was going to get up and leave him to his solitude and join the masses in the break room.  All he had to do was say the words.  She stood and it came out of his mouth. 

“If you want, you can bring your lunch here and we could talk.”

A slow smile spread across her face.  “Sure.  I’ll be right back.”

Kristoff watched her leave the room and caught her eyes as she looked back at him.  That was a good sign. 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Anna had a restless night, and now she had a better understanding of why Kristoff had looked tired the day before.

The talk they had over their short lunch, had opened up something between them.  It was there, and real, and she could feel it.  Kristoff could too, she could tell.  His eyes bored into hers as they talked, taking her in in the way she was taking him in with hers.  And then the bell rang way too soon.

Anna went back to her room feeling fluttery and light.  She even lingered a moment after class, and waited until she saw him walk past her room, looking in and smiling.  She’d called out that she’d walk to the parking lot with him, and he waited while she put on her coat and grabbed her purse.  The talk was brief, but she was suddenly desperate to find out everything about him. 

And then he was on her mind all night long. 

The next morning, it hadn’t snowed and the forecast was for clear skies, so Anna went into her classroom early, not surprised one little bit that Kristoff was in his.  She stopped by his door and noticed there was only one kid there so far, reading quietly at his desk.  She was hoping for an empty classroom but this was going to have to do and the student in question was a quiet one.  Not that this wasn’t going to start a rumor. 

She approached the desk where he was going through some papers.  “Morning, Kristoff.  How are you?”

He looked up quickly and have her an even quicker smile.  “Morning!  I’m Good, how about you, Anna?”

“I’m good.  A little tired, but you know… pretty good.”  She suddenly felt a little flustered in his warm brown gaze. 

“Hmm.  Didn’t sleep well?”

“Not really.”

“Seems to be going around.”

Anna did not miss what he meant by that and by the way he was looking at her.  “How about you?  You catch up on your rest?”

His smile widened and he chuckled low.  “Went to bed at eight, so yeah.  Got nine hours in.”

“That’s great!  I imagine your class will be lively again today.”

“With the experiment I have planned to show the kids, we’ll definitely be disturbing you.”

Anna grinned at him.  “Wonderful.  I love hearing the kids have fun.”

“If it gets too loud though, please let me know.  Mrs. G complained to me all the time.”

“I promise it won’t,” she said, noticing a few kids filtering into the class behind her.  If she was going to go for it, she better get it out now.  “Have a fun morning, and if you want, you can join me in my classroom today for lunch?”

One eyebrow twitched up ever so slightly.  “Sure.  I’d love to.”

-----

Despite Anna’s attempt to keep things low key, she was already hearing kids talk rumors.  And it had only taken a matter of hours for the gossip to spread.  The kids were apparently tickled pink with the idea of Miss A and Mr. B getting together and going on a date.   Now all Anna had to do was get Kristoff to ask her out on one. 

Kristoff showed up for lunch before all the kids had left the room, which she knew would further stoke the flames of the chatter.  Not that she really cared. 

He asked her all about how she got into teaching and she had a great time talking to him, then the bell rang and they finished teaching out their day and walking to the parking lot together again.  He bid her a good night but did not ask her out.  It had disappointed her, but Kristoff seemed kind of laid-back to her, like he just rolled with it, so maybe he just had no presence of mind to rush things.  Unlike Anna, who had already pictured kissing him, among other things, about a dozen times. 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Kristoff parked in the staff lot and lingered in his truck a moment.  There was no snow to shovel, so no real reason to hurry into the school so early.  That, and Anna’s car wasn’t there yet.

He was going to ask her out on a date, of that he was certain.  What he wasn’t so certain about was whether or not it was a good idea.  He’d already heard the kids whisper about them, and it bothered him.  He was very careful to maintain professionalism in the workplace, and while there were absolutely no rules about dating a staff member, the fact that the kids were so into it was weird to him. 

He decided to let it go when he saw Anna’s car pull of the main road and made a show of slowly grabbing his bag and getting out of the truck so it wasn’t obvious that he had waited for her.  She parked beside him with a bright smile while he shut his door and lingered.  Her head popped up over the roof of the car a moment later.

“Morning, Kristoff.  Walk in with me?”

He smiled.  “Sure.”

“Just a sec…”  She disappeared back into her car to gather her things. 

“No problem.”  It took her a moment, making him smile a little more.  Finally, she gathered her bag and her purse and shut her door.

“TGIF, am I right?”  She laughed, falling in step beside him. 

“Definitely.  Any plans for the weekend?”

“Eh, not really.  Call my sister on Sunday, but that’s about it.  Maybe some Christmas shopping.  I like to get that done early.”

So did Kristoff.  In fact, he was already done.

“How about you?” she asked, as they rounded the bus loop and headed towards the front doors. 

“Oh, not too much.  Go to my folks for dinner on Sunday.”  He took a quick breath and went for it.  “Maybe take you out for dinner tomorrow night?”

Anna stopped in her tracks only feet from the front door and Kristoff resisted the urge to look at the staff window to see who was spying on them.  That was the whole reason he wanted to ask her when they were alone.  The gossip among the staff was sometimes worse than the children.  

She smiled at him in a way he hadn’t yet seen, and it made his stomach do little flips.  “Sure, Kristoff.  I would love that.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

On Monday morning, Anna was accosted by Tracy in the staff room. 

The woman had her hands on her hips.  “So you and Mr. B went on a date this weekend?”

Anna bristled at the stern look from the older woman.  “How in the hell did you hear about that?”  She’d been careful not to let the kids know about their date plans, and no one had been around when he’d asked her. 

“Janice, the kindergarten teacher, was at the restaurant that night and saw the two of you canoodling over dinner.”

“So?  Two consenting adults going on a date isn’t a crime.”

“It is when the man is that fine,” Tracy said, arching and eyebrow and giving Anna and evil smile.  “Good for you, girl.”

Anna smiled and giggled nervously with no idea of how to respond to that.

“I’m just joking with you, Anna.  Relax.”  Tracy left the staff room laughing to herself and Anna’s cheeks were on fire. 

She quickly grabbed another coffee and rushed to her classroom, stopping briefly by Kristoff’s open door to smile at him.  Their date, had been magical.  Kristoff was wonderful, kind, honest, intelligent, and sexy as all get out.  He was the man she’d been looking for her entire life.  The sparks flew, and yeah, she supposed they were canoodling over dinner. 

Then Kristoff dropped her off at her place, declined the invite inside, then kissed her in the most wonderful, yet chaste way, leaving her weak in the knees.  She was already head over heels about him and could not wait to go on their next date.  If all went well, they’d be spending more of the weekend together than just their Friday night.

*****

Kristoff went on with explaining the science projects that the kids were going to create and test, but his mind was completely occupied with thoughts of Anna and how he already knew that he was going to fall deeply in love with her.

She ignited things in his soul that he didn’t even know were there.  Time with her was some of the best of his entire life.  And the best part was, he could feel the same kind of energy coming from Anna.   She had wanted him to come into her place when he dropped her off, she made that very clear.  But Kristoff was raised with respect and somehow, he managed to decline despite what his body was telling him.  They were going out again this Friday and he knew she was going to ask again for him to come in after their date, and while he planned to say no, wanting to hold out for the third, he had to wonder if he’d have enough strength to deny her again.

SIX MONTHS LATER

It turned out that Kristoff did not possess the strength to be able to deny her again, and after their second date, him and Anna made love for the first time.  They were inseparable after that.

Anna had been set to leave the school when Mrs. Gleeman returned, only to be informed that the healing was taking its toll on the much older woman, and she’d need another three to four weeks of recovery.  Kristoff was sad that Mrs. G (even as grouchy as she always was to him) was having a hard time, but happy that meant Anna would be at the school a little longer.   And with the thought of her eventually leaving the school looming in his mind, he asked her to move in with him only five weeks after their first date. 

His home had never felt like home until Anna had moved in.  She made his life so much better, and they did absolutely everything together.  Except, at school it was business, and they kept the fact that they were so involved, from everyone there.   Even Tracy had stopped pestering Anna after not getting the information she wanted.  The kids still talked, because Kristoff and Anna still took turns eating lunch in each other’s classrooms, but with no ammo besides a healthy friendship, the murmurs soon ceased. 

More time went on and Anna had been getting genuinely depressed when it was looking like she’d have to move onto another school to substitute at, when low and behold, Mrs. G showed up one morning to meet with the principal and Anna.

Mrs. Gleeman’s daughter, lifelong friends with one of the mothers who Anna taught, had commented about her improvement in her child’s grades and the fact that she was genuinely having a better time at school.  Apparently, Anna’s sharp ears, zero tolerance for bullying and taunting, and constant encouragement to be kind and to help one another, had put an end to her friend’s daughter getting picked on.  Now she even had a couple of good friends and raved about what a great teacher Miss A was.  And apparently, they were not the first parent to comment on the positive changes in their children.

By the end of that meeting, with Mrs. Gleeman’s plans to retire early and her encouragement, Anna had a permanent job teaching junior high English.  She had thanked the older woman and the principal profusely, and went back to her classroom weeping with happiness.  Her students, shocked to see her in such a state, inquired to her emotion.  Kristoff had never heard such a ruckus roar of approval coming from her classroom as she told them she wasn’t going anywhere.  By the end of that day, it was all the kids who entered his class could talk about.

Then, the inevitable happened.  Him and Anna were out bowling on a date in town, when one of their students happened to be there at the same time.  Neither he or Anna had noticed the kid until after a bunch of PDA, and by then it was much too late.  They decided to pretend the student wasn’t there and went about their date.  And as they expected, the following Monday, tongues were wagging among the kids, and they had not stopped for over a week.  Therefore, by that second Friday since that date, Kristoff had an idea to put that to rest once and for all.

He had to put his plan together quickly, informing the principal and other junior high teachers for approval before getting the most important part of his plan.  He was a little nervous, having only been with Anna for six months, but knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that they were meant for each other.

The morning finally came, and all the junior high students were called into the gym to address the rumors that had been flying around for the past couple weeks.  Kristoff watched them all file in, shaking with nerves.  He couldn’t believe he was about to do this, but having Anna stand by his side, filled him with confidence. 

“How could they not have given us a heads up that we had to address this?” she asked him, leaning over to speak low as the remaining kids and teachers came into the gym.  She’d been informed by the principal at the same time as her class that they were all about to meet to talk about two teachers rumored to be in a relationship.

“Uh, actually, this was my idea.”

Anna’s head snapped in his direction and she looked at him with wide questioning eyes.  “And you didn’t tell me?”

Kristoff pursed his lips but didn’t answer her.  The door to the gym swung shut with the last teacher ushering the kids in and he decided to just go for it.

“Hey, hey!”  He held up his hands.  “Quiet down.”  The kids were too excited and the volume didn’t drop one bit.  “Quiet down, please!” he said, louder, repeating himself a few times, and finally the murmurs died down.

He spared a glance at Anna standing beside him, her cheeks alight with embarrassment and looking over all the kids to the back of the room.   He felt a pang of regret, like this was suddenly a really bad idea, then he looked back at the kids and found renewed strength.

“I’ve had several students mention something to me,” he started.  “Raise your hand if you’ve heard a rumor about Miss A and I.”

Every single student raised their hands and started to giggle and talk.  The noise level took off again and Kristoff had to speak over the din.  “Hands down.  Okay!  Hands down, quiet please.”

The students all quieted and Kristoff resumed his speech.  “There is a rumor going around that Miss A and I are dating.  So I think it’s about time that we address that rumor, and confirm that the answer is… yes, Miss A and I are dating.”

The kids freaked out.  They all shouted with genuine glee and Kristoff looked over to see Anna smiling despite the fact that her face was now crimson.  She looked back at him still shocked and wondering what in the hell he was doing given the fact that he had not mentioned this to her beforehand, but also looking a bit more relaxed about the whole ordeal.

It took him a moment to settle the kids back down, all the while his heart hammered away in his chest.  Once the students were finally settled again, he went for it. 

“The truth is, we are a little more than dating…”  The murmurs began so Kristoff talked over them to get it out and not prolong this any more than it already had been.  “Because I am completely in love with her.”

The kids gasped and started to cheer again and Anna had started to get emotional at the clear delight and support from their students.  She wiped at her glistening eyes as she looked back at Kristoff, and he raised his hand, waiting a moment to get enough of the chatter down to finish this. 

“Quiet, please,” he said loudly, his hand slipping into his pocket.  “Quiet down!”  The noise died and Kristoff took one last nervous swallow, slowly turning to Anna and sinking to his knee.  “I was wondering if Miss A, would like to become Mrs. B?”

Anna’s hands flew to her mouth as the gym erupted with excited screaming.  All Kristoff could do was look at her in question as his words would be drown out by the excited teenagers.  She nodded an enthusiastic yes before offering him her hand to slip the ring onto.  As soon as it was in place he was up on his feet, pulling her into a protective hug while the students carried on their joy for their teachers.   He knew she was going to be shocked, made evident to him in the way she was shaking in his arms, but he knew she would appreciate his plan. 

And she did.  Later that night, after a celebratory dinner, she confided in him how wonderful his gesture was to include their kids, and how special she felt. 

Then they made love and fell asleep in each other’s arms.

THE NEXT WINTER

“Yo, Mrs. B!”

Anna turned around and ducked anticipating what was about to happen.  The snowball sailed over her head and she gave the now eighth graders a stern look, even though she couldn’t help but smile.  “Get your butts to class, gentlemen!”

The boys laughed and took off to their door with Kristoff chuckling beside her.  “Seem’s like I’m just chopped liver to them now,” he said.  “Those snowballs used to have my title on them.”

Anna laughed.  “Don’t worry.  It’s the first snowfall of the season.  I am sure the next one will have Mr. all over it.”

Kristoff hummed his amusement and him and Anna continued to shovel the walks.  They decided to do it together since it would get done faster, and Kristoff mentioned to her that he was genuinely relived not to see a bunch of faces watching him from the staff room window anymore.

The whole junior high body was invited to their wedding ceremony.  Not to it proper, of course that would have been crazy, but to watch the live stream if they were so inclined.  After the first couple days of their honeymoon, Anna had checked and was surprised to see how many people had actually watched it.  There were tons of wonderful and supportive comments.

Those first two weeks of newlywedded bliss exploring the fjords of Norway, had been the best of Anna’s entire life aside from the day she married her best friend.  Kristoff was the most wonderful person she had ever met in her life, and she was thankful to be able to call him her husband.

They finished shoveling and returned to their classrooms to begin preparing for the day, when the principal made an announcement that he would like all the junior high students to assemble in the gym.   Anna ushered her kids out of the classroom and received a concerned and questioning look from Kristoff when she met him in the hallway. 

She shrugged her shoulders and kept back the smile that was fighting to form her lips.  Anna had truly adored the way that Kristoff had proposed, but still vowed to herself to get him back. 

The teachers gathered in the corner while the kids huddled together, sitting on the floor and waiting for whatever they were about to be told.  The principal came in, greeted everyone, and got the ball rolling.

“Quiet down, please,” he said, gesturing with his hands for the kids to settle.   “I’ve called you all in her to receive an announcement from one of our teachers.  Mrs. Bjorgman, you have the floor.”

Kristoff’s head whipped in her direction and he stared at her with shock, so Anna decided to get it out while she still had the nerves.

“Well, I have to say that I am going to be taking a leave of absence.” 

The students started to murmur with concern and Kristoff went so far as to reach out and grab her hand.

“Anna?” he asked quietly, his tone full of worry.

Anna looked back at him, gave hum a gentle smile, and returned to the kids.  “I will be taking leave of my position at the end of April.”

Hands shot up with questions and Anna felt Kristoff squeeze her hand firmly but did not look over at him yet.  She picked Brie, since she was sitting in the front row.  “Yes, Brie?”

The grade sevener frowned.  ““Are you coming back?” 

“Yes, of course.”

The students started to murmur louder and Anna picked another kid with their hand up.  “Yes, Brandon?”

“How long will you be gone?”

The students quieted down immediately to hear the answer.  “A year.” 

More hands shot up and Anna felt Kristoff squeeze her hand again.  She picked another student.  “Yes, Samantha?”

“Why are you leaving?”

Anna finally looked at Kristoff, and his expression was in awe.  She knew he was too smart not to figure out what she was going to say next, and she smiled at him, eyes welling up with happy tears.

She turned back to the kids.  “Mr. B and I are going to have a baby.”

Much like Kristoff’s proposal, the kids cheered for them, and Anna let the tears come as Kristoff pulled her into a protective hug. 

“Anna, I am so happy,” Kristoff said, his voice wavering with emotion.  “I can’t believe you’ve kept this a secret for four months.”

Anna laughed, not at all surprised Kristoff had done the math.  She pulled back to look at his glassy eyes and happy smile.  “Well, I had to get you back for that surprise proposal.  So… surprise!”

He chuckled, and pulled her into another hug, the volume of the kids rising as they began talking excitedly.  “This is the absolute best surprise,” he said in her ear.  “Thank you, Anna.”

Anna hugged him back tighter.  Her heart was happy and full, and she could not wait to meet their first baby in the spring.

I would never have guessed that you consider Smut as one of your weaker points, bc for me it was really good while I was reading it, means that once you are more confident about it, Babe you'll kill it.

YES blowjobs are better when you are reading them than seeing them, but for me it applies to majority of things in sex lol. The pegging HAHA sorry it's something I have seen its usual on pet play.

But after reading that I'm excited to see you experiment with those new themes you talk about. The request sounds interesting Lmao, take your time tho, wouldn't want you to stress because of it. Gonna be stalking your page until then.

Also the title is perfect haha <3

i’m gonna cry, thank you 😭

writing in itself is still relatively new for me so there are definitely areas i can improve on. i ‘started’ this blog at the end of january this year (i’d had it for a while i just never uploaded) with DTIK and i literally uploaded the first chapter like a week after i wrote it and that’s where it all started and my experience is like the last 10 months. i had written in the past when i was like 13-14 but it will never see the light of day, it was very much the unrealistic, mafia bangtan but i was convinced to write an empowered woman that didn’t need men, which they don’t, but my writing was so crusty i can’t read it now without giggling. i have 60 something drafts of wattpad 😭 of crusty old fics.

i think the first time i wrote smut was 4 months ago? maybe? it could be 5, i know i was still in china at the time because i remember i’d said i wanted to add smut to the last chapter of TBAH but then i was like yeah idk how to write this in part 9 and then an anon was like “i think it’s time they fucked” and i was like yeah you’re probably right. and i remember sitting there thinking what the hell am i supposed to say, this is kinda awkward and i was stupid and thought an ot7 fic would be a good place to start. writing smut for 8 people is so freaking hard so i had to split it up into subunits 😭 and then i started writing “smut” in DTIK but they haven’t actually had sex yet so it doesn’t really count and then helping hands came along + rope bunny and that basically all my experience so i’m happy i seem to be good at it 😭

my skin crawls when a bj post comes up on my twitter, i scroll past them so quick THE NOISE I ACTUALLY HATE IT 😭 it’s so much better when you read it 😭 i’ve read some out-there smut, and i think ‘wait that’s kinda hot’ and then i think logically in real life what that would be like and i want to cry because it would be foul

don’t be sorry about the pegging 😋, it’s actually not something i’ve thought about putting in a fic before but also it reminds me of that rumor that prince william is into pegging so i can’t take it seriously

IM SO CLOSE TO FINEIHINF THE REQUEST. i’ve edited to main part, and it’s like 50/50 it’ll come out tonight if i could just hurry up and write the sexy lil smut scene but also i have ptsd from wattpad smut so i always try to make sure it’s nothing like that and there’s a decent amount of detail to fuel the reader’s imagination 😋

i always think about, what if someone stalks my page because recently i went through a few of my old posts and it’s kinda crusty ngl, the other day someone liked a post i made months and months and months ago that literally only had the tag of the au so only people that followed me at the time could see it and i was like oh someone liked that but they would have had to have scrolled so far down, i don’t post a shit ton on here but they would have been so deep into my page i wanted to cry because i can’t remember half the stuff i post and there’s definitely some dark stuff crawling in the depths of this blog but that au was cute so i’m glad they liked it 😭

while we’re on the topic of my writing weaknesses, titles. i’m so shit at naming my fics it’s awful 😭 i changed “open” like 3 times before it became that name because i cant name my fics for shit it’s so bad 😭

embarrassed ft. matsukawa issei

wc. 2.7k (???)

warnings. SMUT, not proofread lol, mutual pining (??), friends to lovers (???), cunnilingus lmao, no dom/sub dynamics, well actually dom&sub issei if you squint rlly hard hehe, kinda cute, embarrassed issei <3, also one (1) WAP reference

an. it’s 2:30 am and i have no idea why i wrote this and who for???? i got the idea from a 🦋😳🙈✨ audio and was immediately inspired idk, sorry if it’s bad i lichrally have no idea since i didn’t read it after it was done :p

( ˘ ³˘)♥︎

it wasn’t like matsukawa issei to be embarrassed.

he was handsome, intelligent, and funny, not to mention he never left women wanting after a night with him.

issei was the entire package and he knew it.

beyond superficiality though, he was happy with his life. he had a great group of friends, a nice apartment all to himself and a completely normal job.

yes, being a funeral home employee wasn’t the most glamorous career a person could have but he was happy. besides, it never deterred him from getting a warm body to sleep with which was a win in his book.

all in all? his life was great!

so why did he have to go and screw it all up?

issei blames makki and the dumb flyer for the reason his life went to shit. (maybe he’s being a little dramatic, but let him have his oikawa moment.)

he was minding his own business when his best friend (recently turned enemy) burst through his apartment door with a piece of paper in his hand and a fire in his eyes.

“dude, look at this!” issei rolled his eyes, putting down his casket catalogue and turning to meet takahiro’s gaze.

“why hello to you too. remind me why i gave you a key again?”

“because you love me and because i bring shit like this to you. look!” with another long and suspiciously tooru-like sigh, issei took the crumpled paper from makki and immediately stopped in his tracks.

“makki... what the fuck is this?”

written in large pink letters and a flowery, borderline illegible font was the name, coffee and cunnilingus. upon further inspection and careful reading, it revealed itself to be a little cafe opening up about 10 minutes from issei’s apartment complex who were looking to hire “young, attractive men who are proficient at eating pussy.”

issei could feel his eyes narrow and his mouth drop open in shock as he repeated his question. “the fuck is this?”

makki shook his head excitedly, tapping to another portion of the flyer that matsukawa had not yet read. “no, no dude, just look at how much they’re paying per hour.” issei begrudgingly obliged but the minute his eyes touched the (Massive™) number, he felt a little faint.

it was a lot of money. more than the funeral home was paying, that’s for sure. with that kind of money he could move out of this suddenly dingy seeming apartment and into a nice flat in the city were he’d always wanted to live. maybe he could buy himself a nice watch or even a high-end suit to replace the one from his highschool graduation (aka the only suit he owns). with that kind of money, he could erase his student debt 3 years ahead of schedule and get his mom into a nicer place.

it was these thoughts that clouded issei’s head as he found himself standing in front of a cute looking building, matching the address on the flyer. i’ll only be working part time, he thought as he pushed the door open to reveal an equally impressing interior with curtained booths and a wide variety of coffee on the menu. i’m only doing it for extra money, he thought as he shook the owner’s hand after he finished his successful interview. no one can ever know, he thought as he dressed himself in the uniform on his first day.

thus began issei’s super secret side hustle where he ate women out for cash.

sounds worse when you say it outright but it was just working. he was good at it, the women liked him, and he was making BANK. still, there were challenges. some women refused to bathe before coming and he would have to send them to the restroom to freshen up which absolutely ruined his chances for a good tip. some women would become heavily infatuated with him, believing that they were in some sort of forbidden romance. he learned to turn them down quick and easy to avoid conflict in the workplace which furthered his space as a boss favorite. but his hardest challenge by far was meeting you.

you were one of hanamaki’s friends, having met him at one of his brief stints in retail on his search for a job. he had gotten fired but you both stayed in touch after he left, becoming really close, really fast.

issei had met you first when takahiro had invited you to the biweekly seijoh third-years movie night. at first, he had been pissed as an “outsider” had never been invited before and he was worried you’d ruin the vibe, especially since it was the first time in months that oikawa would be able to join them. makki vouched for you through and through and the other boys were okay with it so you were in. the second he met you, all his fears of awkwardness and discomfort faded away.

you were great.

you were hilarious, pretty, and could keep up with makki’s harsh jokes, tooru’s diva attitude, iwa’s tendency to hit (hard), and issei’s original disdain. by the end of the night, he had completely forgotten why he didn’t want you there in the first place.

from then on, you were a staple in their little friend group. you were added to the groupchat where you balanced memes with spouts of deep wisdom and you were ever so reliable, always there if any of them needed it.

yeah, you were great. that’s where the problems started.

issei’s feelings for you quickly went from platonic to romantic, faster than you can say godzilla. he hadn’t even recognized that he was falling for you until it was way too late. normally, he wouldn’t have a problem confessing to you but because of his newly found ...occupation, he was too nervous. how would you take it that he was basically a glorified prostitute? ok, that wasn’t exactly what he did but still! you’d probably find him disgusting and horrible and leave the friend group forever. then he’d have to deal with oikawa’s senseless whining and makki’s subtle digs, blaming him for your departure. yeah, he wasn’t going to put himself through that so he decided to keep his mouth shut.

too bad he didn’t have any control over makki’s.

you and takahiro had been on a little friend-date at mcdonald’s after you’d had a long and frustrating shift. you just wanted to vent, expressing your general hate for your job and desperate need for stress relief.

that’s when makki opened his (big, stupid) mouth and suggested that you visit a little place called coffee and cunnilingus. you nearly choked on your fries at the title before quickly pressing him for details. thankfully, he had the decency not to expose that issei worked there but he had not done a good enough job convincing you not to go there. not that it would’ve mattered. your curiosity was peaked and your libido was high so why not try out the weird cafe where you let a complete stranger stick his tongue inside you?

it was settled. you were going to go and you were going to get eaten out and you were going to like it!

or at least that is what you repeated in your head as you walked to the address on your phone before taking a deep breath and walking inside.

“hello, welcome to coffee and cunnilingus, how might i pleasure you this afterno— yn?” issei’s eyes widened as they met your equally bewildered ones, the both of you staring at each other in shock.

“matsukawa-san, is everything alright?” a large hand rested on issei’s shoulder, startling him out of his thoughts and forcing him to break (horrified) eye contact with you and move it onto his boss who was now looking down on him menacingly.

“y-yes sir, everything is fine!” he squeaked out, hating the way his voice cracked on his first syllable. his boss looked at him suspiciously but thankfully didn’t press.

“well, since nothing is wrong, take this beautiful young woman to a booth where you will assist her!” the hand resting on issei’s shoulder slowly squeezed, making him wince in pain. the pain was only an afterthought though to the larger implication of his boss’ words. he’s going to assist you. assist as in pleasure. pleasure as in eat you out.

holy shit, you were going to pass out.

apparently, issei had the same thought process as you, his face whitening like a sheet. “m-me? but sir i-“

“do your job matsukawa-san!” his boss cut him off with a forced smile. all issei could do was nod and silently lead you off to a closed booth near the back or lose his job. you stayed close behind him but remained quiet, absolutely terrified of breaking the silence and ruining the bubble you had created.

you finally reached the booth in question. issei gently opened the curtain and motioned for you to get it, to which you obliged and he followed just behind.

the moment the curtain closed, you were enveloped in an awkward silence and tense atmosphere, neither of you speaking or looking at one another for fear of one of you running out. after what felt like hours, you opened your mouth to speak, not realizing issei had thought the same thing.

“so-“

“i-“

you finally made eye contact with him and burst into the laughter, the tension quickly broken. it took a full minute or two for the both of you to calm down, the absurdity of the entire situation finally catching up with you.

“you first,” issei said, wiping tears from the corners of his eyes while fixing you with an intense gaze swirled with an emotion you couldn’t quite place but it made butterflies bubble up in your stomach. you quickly turned your gaze to the comfortable seat beneath you, your fingers playing with the red stitching while you thought of what you had wanted to say.

“are you any good?” your hand flew up to cover your mouth as your cheeks filled with heat, the embarrassment of your words catching up to you. you hadn’t meant to say that but when you opened your mouth to apologize, you were stopped in your tracks by the lovely sound of issei’s full-bodied laughter filling the tiny booth.

you had heard it just moments earlier but without the sound of your own giggles drowning it out, you couldn’t help but think that he sounded beautiful. you basked in the sound as it slowly trailed off back into silence. now it was you doing the staring making issei look off with a red face and a heart threatening to pound out of his chest.

“y-yeah i’m pretty good. you want to try? me, i mean?” his words nearly leave you gasping, your brain working overtime to try and comprehend what he was saying to you.

“only if y-you want to? what do you want issei?” you whispered, suddenly unable to find your voice. you wanted this to be okay for him too; you didn’t want him to be uncomfortable even though you wanted him more than you could verbally express. despite the embarrassment and fear of rejection lingering under your skin, you stared at him, awaiting his answer. a tiny minuscule nod came from him and you internally shook your head. you needed to hear him.

“i need you to say it, issei.” your words, while quiet, were firm and issei felt himself hardening in his uniform slacks. he swallowed in his increasingly drying mouth before opening his mouth to respond.

“i want to eat your pussy. can i?”

shit.

your own voice was stolen by his words and all you could give him was a nod before he was on you.

issei didn’t waste any time falling to his knees, pulling your panties down, and hiking your skirt up to your stomach, revealing your glistening folds to his hungering eyes.

“fuck, you’re so wet,” is all the warning you get before he’s licking a long stripe up you from entrance to clit before he’s sucking the hard, sensitive nub into his mouth. your eyes immediately rolled back into your head, your hips instinctively bucking up into his mouth while a gasped moan of issei left your lips.

if he could bottle your moans and use them whenever he pleased, he would, the sound sending another pulse of arousal to his already hard cock. he was tempted to reach down and pull himself out of his trousers but he denied himself. this was about you; you and your wet ass pussy.

issei continued his ministrations on your clit, circling it with his tongue before pulling it into his mouth while his hand was ready to get busy. it crept up your thigh, sending shivers down your spine until it reached your sopping entrance, two of his fingers teasing the slit before delving in to the third knuckle.

the moan you let out is borderline animalistic as your body sends another wave of slick pulsing out over his hand. he groaned into your cunt at your tightness, his mind only imagining him deep within you while you squeeze him for all he’s got.

the amount of slick you produced made it easy for him to add a third finger, thrusting them in and out while also crooking them upwards in search for your special spot that would have you seeing stars. it took him a little prodding but he knew he found it when your back arched, your hand came down into his hair, and you whimpered out a string of curses.

“that’s it baby, cmon, you’re doing so well, wanna see you come apart for me,” he all but growled against your clit before delving back in with a higher intensity, his desperation for you to come winning out his desire to tease you and drag this out as long as possible.

with his incessant pressure on your g-spot and his lips suctioned around your clit, it wasn’t long before he got what he wanted.

“isseiisseiisseiissei, i’m coming, i’m coming-oh fuck!” you screamed as you clenched and gushed all over his fingers, your entire body caving in with the intensity of your orgasm. his fingers were practically forced from your spasming cunt but they quickly found a place rubbing your nub side to side as fast as possible. the overwhelming urge to pee came over you and you shook your head, trying to push his hand away.

“no, no, give it to me, i know you can,” issei groaned, his eyes locked on your dripping pussy. the pleasure he was giving came to a head at his words and you felt a clear liquid escape from your tired, overstimulated cunt, your mouth opening in a silent moan before collapsing back on the seat.

the sight proved to be too much for issei as he felt his body tense, his own orgasm washing over him as he emptied himself into his boxers. he fell back onto the ground, in shock of himself coming entirely untouched. he’d never done it before but of course it was you that would bring it out of him. a smile spread across his face at the thought, his head tilting back as he laughed, catching the attention of your worn body.

“what’re y’laughing at?” you slurred, cringing a little at how fucked out you sounded but issei didn’t seem to mind, his face glowing while covered in your slick and cum.

“nothing, nothing, but uh, i have a question.” you felt your heart leap to your chest, your mind already racing with the possibilities. he’s going to say this was a mistake, that we’re just better off as friends. oh god, what if he says i stunk? or the worst pussy he’s ever had? or what if—

“want to go and get a coffee?” he asked, the smile still plastered on his face but with an uncharacteristic hint of shyness. the butterflies were back in your stomach as you shyly nodded before allowing him to help clean you up and standing, not missing how he slipped your lacy underwear deep into one of his pockets.

issei’s hand found its way into yours as he said goodbye to his coworkers and boss before leading you out of the cafe, watching you tell an animated retelling of the bullshit that occurred at your job with a warm grin on his face and pink cheeks.

it might not be like matsukawa issei to be embarrassed but if it resulted in getting you by his side? he would do it again and again.

heyyy there, saw your requests are open. and i'm wondering maybe you could do a timeskip where everything is done and levi finally opened his tea shop. then there he met reader, and he treats them differently from other customers. thank you, hope you're having a good day.

author note :: this was kinda rushed as is most of what i post. the reader is a writer just bc i thought it would be cute and also ISTG. i wrote this entire thing thinking leviolas was such a cool name for a tea shop then googled it and saw it’s also the name of a spider so... ++ btw i have not yet double checked or proofread this because i wrote it at 2am but yeah it’s definitely not great :-) word count :: 2.4k??? somehow???

you’re sweet like honey when you first order from leviolas. you’re the same when you ask the owner for extra napkins and you remain exactly the same when you return with the intention to stick around for a writing session with a black tea by your side

something about you is attractive. that’s what levi thinks of you when you first walk into leviolas

you’re just incredibly wholesome poking your head around looking at all of the handmade pastries and confectioneries in admiration

you think the homely decor is cute and reminiscent of cottages in the countryside, the view outside the windows is beautiful and the scent of coffee alongside tea is heavenly

the pastries are beautiful and you find yourself eyeing the macrons pretty frequently. just EVERYTHING about leviolas is cute :-(

but one particular thing is especially adorable to you

and that would be the owner

when you hear his name for the first time you’re a little shocked

levi ackerman to be specific captain levi ackerman, the high ranking official who aided in paradis’ independence and freed the nation from the grip of titans

you read about him a year back in a paper or two and vividly recall the valiant title he held as humanity’s strongest soldier

he still holds the title that’s for sure but now he happens to own a tea shop

it’s slightly unusual it’s not every day you see a soldier retire and live such a plain life but you suppose the simplicity makes levi happy

honestly, if you had been through hell and back like him you too would wish to spend the rest of your days in the company of tea leaves and sweet cakes

today is a day like any other you’re sat by one of the windows and contemplating sitting in the outside seating area

the sun is shining and lands uncomfortably on your face at this angle and you may as well make your way outside

but before you can a shadow looms over you and a broad chest leans over to cover the window with dainty curtains

“you looked bothered by the light.”

oh god.

it’s him.

he’s standing there looking at you with an unreadable expression and all you can do is open and close your mouth not knowing what to say

humanity’s strongest soldier

levi ackerman

also known as the really really really attractive cafe owner you’ve been crushing on for the last few months now

seeing him up close is much more different to looking at him from the comfort of your seat or whilst you order

he’s normally got his back turned whilst collecting orders or another worker collects them as he prepares the beverages

that’s why the unexpected interaction has you nervous

you can always tell when he’s made your drink because he honestly has a way with tea leaves and you kinda want to gush about how much you enjoy it

but, no, no, no.

you’re panicking just looking at him

soft black strands of hair stick to his forehead, his undercut is oddly satisfying to stare at and he smells of pine trees which again is refreshing

“ah hahaha thank you for blocking the sun out!!”

why the fuck did you ha ha????

this is so awkward.

putting on your best front you beam up at him hoping your toothy smile doesn’t look stupid

then again it probably does because who the hell has a good toothy smile

nobody.......

levi’s gaze lingers on you but if he has anything else he wants to say he doesn’t make it known

instead he firmly nods and turns away

you’ve messed up,,

only!!! you manage to mess up even more....?

without thinking your hand latches onto the back of his blue button up and your face burns up realizing what it is you’ve done when he stiffens to a stop

as quick as your hand has grabbed onto his shirt it lets go and you awkwardly laugh again

hahahahaha

“i’m sorry i didn’t mean to hold onto you so hard i was just...wondering if you could let me in on your secret.”

the random sentence is one you’ve made off the top of your head because you don’t have any real reason for holding onto him

but thankfully for you the saccharine of your voice is enough to sway levi

when he turns to see you with the same smile eagerly awaiting his answer something sparks in him

his chest feels a little funny but he ignores it

“secret?” he questions

“yeah!! your tea!! you’re really good at making it and aaaahhhh” you sigh contently thinking back on it.

“i remember when i ordered rose tea one time. you made it beautifully and the taste was infused so delicately it was incredibly soothing.”

hearing you ramble passionately about what he loves to do makes his chest feel funny again

he doesn’t know what the hell is going on exactly

but the only way he can explain it is his heart somersaulting and flipping despite him not wanting it to

despite that, it’s quite enjoyable

it’s probably got something to do with your kindhearted demeanor or the way you always manage to give him a smile when you waltz in

but levi finds himself fighting to touch you more and more as the days pass

your collar is always haphazardly done and he wants to lean in and fix it

sometimes you’ll have an eyelash on your face and he wants to lean in to swipe it away with his thumb

occasionally he stares at your hair and wants to sort it out. half the time it’s all over the place from the wind

he wants to lean in and smooth it out.

all he wants to do is LEAN IN but he sees no valid reason to

he’s lucky he’s always able to catch himself before his thumb reaches your cheek (you’re very oblivious and never notice how close he really gets)

ever since your first encounter at leviolas a few months back he’s been dragged into your world of books and lively stories

it doesn’t take you long to break out of your shell and you’re always telling levi something new

he doesn’t speak as much as you but when you coax out a story or two out of him he’s always earnest

you’ve learnt a lot through the conversations

you’ve learnt about his lost comrades, the horrible things he had to see on the battlefield, how he hopes he’ll live happy with what he has left

there are certain conversation topics he skips entirely and you respect his boundaries

you and levi are sat by a window and a comfortable silence floats between you two

it’s been four months

four months since you asked what his secret was

come to think of it he never told you what it was

he’s intently staring at you as you drink the lemon tea he’s just made you and his stare is a little too intense

feeling nervous you pick up your cup hoping for something to occupy yourself

recently the butterflies in your stomach have been increasing in number but you know it’s wrong to fancy levi

you don’t know why you think that but it’s the fact that you’re sure you’re not his type

he probably likes organised people, dependable people, funny people

not you.

you’re just an irksome author who spends your days writing in his shop

honestly he finds you annoying he has to. you’re always hanging around here

however, you do remember the one day you did choose to write in the park he thought you had died or something. that made you feel a little sad because he can’t really help but automatically worry if his routine is broken and you happen to have accidentally become part of his schedule

no, like levi’s literally said he has your name in his planner and whenever he thinks of a new thing to make you he’ll write it down with your name next to it

but still,, you’re convinced he has to find you annoying

there’s no reason for thinking it but you DEFINITELY think it’s correct

absentmindedly you haven’t even noticed levi still staring at you

“y/n?”

looking up at levi he’s clearly worried about something

humming in response telling him to continue he does

“i like someone.”

oh.

“...i’m not sure they’d return my feelings, that’s why i mentioned it.”

you smile at him warmly and you feel your heart sink, obviously he has to like someone. it’s probably someone in the corps, someone strong, someone capable. you’re not any of those things.

“well, you need not worry. if a man as good as you fancied me i’d be over the moon. i’m sure they would too!”

keep optimistic, don’t let him see you upset.

levi’s cheeks grow bright red and he bashfully tries to hide his embarrassment by covering his face with his hands

you laugh when he doesn’t budge and stays in the same position 

“c’mon levi, confess they’ll accept you have nothing to fear.” you coo persuasively

finally letting up after a few seconds he lets his arms drop to his sides.

“would you date me?”

the question takes you aback and you stare at him startled

soon realizing the idiocy laced in the inquiry he quickly retracts his statement

“nevermind, that was stupid.”

ignoring him you still want to answer

“uh well, i would. i have thought about it on occasion.”

he’s blinking rapidly trying to process what you’ve just admitted.

“you’ve thought about...?”

“dating you. yes i have.”

“and why the hell would you do that?” you can’t tell if he’s mad at you

“you’re capable, respectful. you’re considerate and quiet. i mean it you’re an amazing man really. also your tea!! imagine getting to drink it every day.”

you really have to add in the part about his tea because you know he loves it when you compliment it :-)

“ok, you drink my tea every day already.”

his short uninterested response stings and the dam of regret bursts open 

you shouldn’t have said all of that.

you and levi sit in an awkward silence for what feels like an eternity. you don’t dare look at him and your course of action is too drink your tea as quick as possible before dismissing yourself.

but before you can set your plan in motion levi breaks the ice.

“let’s date.”

you freeze and your eyes grow to the size of saucers

what did he just say???

he has to be losing his mind

“but levi what about the person you like?”

his eyebrow cocks upwards and an amused expression stretches across his face.

“i was talking about you.” he confesses boldly

this is a fever dream, nope, nope nope. you can not comprehend that this is your reality.

pinching your arm you hiss a little when you feel the pain

okay so, you’re definitely not dreaming...

“i, you, me. you...you like me?” the sentence is a jumble of words but you manage to sputter out something that makes sense

“yes. i like you.”

he’s being so blunt you can’t tell if he’s being serious but when you remind yourself that this is levi you relax, a blunt straightforward confession is meaningful coming from him 

BUT THAT’S BESIDES THE POINT

HELLO???? HE LIKES YOU BACK?%^%^”*

you get all blushy and flustered and you let out another one of your awkward hahahahaha’s but it’s a good hahahahaha

cautiously testing the waters he grabs your hand from across the table intertwining his fingers with yours

the gesture is adorable. the buzzing sensation that travels through your laced fingers makes you giggle to yourself giddily

“leviolas suddenly a matchmaking agency now? ;-)” your joke is dry and unfunny and levi rolls his eyes at it 

“you’re not funny.”

“but you still like me.” you tease

“yes. i still like you.” he admits

a few days have passed since then

you and levi have been the talk of the town 

humanity’s strongest soldier finally found his flame???

the chatter and rumors spread like wildfire, both you and levi aren’t fans of being in the spotlight but nothing negative has been said so there’s no complaints so far

levi places a cup of tea in front of you, it’s a herbal kind because you’ve been complaining about a headache

today you’re explaining why you dislike the plot of beauty and the beast and how there’s so much wrong with it. from the weirdly toxic relationship to the power imbalance. levi stands listening attentively whilst waiting for you to take a sip of the tea

just as you’ve paused to take a large breathe and prepare yourself to continue explaining how unbearable that book is levi uses it as his chance to say what he’s been wanting to 

“drink up before it’s ice cold.”

following his instructions you interrupt yourself and take a gulp of the herbal tea

your eyes glimmer in approval. it tastes of strawberries and you’re delighted already feeling your mood slightly raise in response

“it’s GREAT?? what did you put in it?? it doesn’t even taste medicinal.” once again, you’re fawning over his tea

“so levi ackerman, what really is the secret to all these perfect cups of tea?”

and without a seconds hesitation he responds.

“i was making the tea for you. that’s the secret.”

it takes a while for the gravity of his words to sink it but when the meaning does you cup his face in your palms and peck him everywhere. he whines a little but you can tell he enjoys the attention

you find that you’re more than happy you’ve found a home in levi and his shop

and levi’s more than happy he’s found a home in you and your books

:-)

title: a little more noise

pairing: kyōtani kentarō x gn!reader

synopsis: in a world of constant silence, he’s the noise you need in life, even if he’s a bit quiet.

warnings: fluff, angst, mutual pining, slowburn, strangers to friends to lovers, lotta tropes and cliches, two swear words if i counted correctly

word count: 4.8k+

a/n: i wrote this in two days which i’m very proud of, go me! always wanted to write a kyōken fic and here it is. kinda scared to post this bc he’s quite tough to characterize imo and i’m terrible at writing longer pieces. oh well :,) no indentation because that’d be such a pain. hope you like it, feedback is always appreciated! (this is also my first time writing slowburn so please lmk if it’s still too fast)

Your parents were not bad people—that was a fact. They were kind, and you did everything an ordinary family would; eat dinner together, go on trips, attend school events. Things were quiet, a little too quiet for comfort. It never felt… right. You heard stories of parents arguing, nasty divorces, and custody battles. They tore your friends apart, made them feel a pain you could never understand. You knew how terrible it was, yet sometimes you wished you went through that to fill the silence in your home. The same monotonous, “good mornings,” and “hellos,” became sickening to hear. You told yourself to push on until after graduation where you’d escape. As the years dragged on, you weren’t so sure you could keep your sanity intact.

It was how you met Kyōtani Kentarō, a second-year from your school who was in a different class. Your friend told you of a gym nearby that was secluded at night. With a sly grin, he said he met up with students from other schools to smoke, and sometimes as a hookup spot. You wrinkled your nose at his comment and flicked his forehead. These were the people you hung out with; not so bright, but easygoing and fun. They were the ones who satisfied the need for noise, the bit of excitement in your life.

You snuck out after your parents had gone to bed. It didn’t hit until halfway through your walk that several things could happen. You were alone with nothing to defend yourself with except your phone and bare hands. Looking down at your outfit, an old dark hoodie and some sweats, you hoped it was ominous enough to ward people away. Besides, the last thing you wanted was to go home and wallow in its emptiness.

To see the lights on in the gym was a surprise. Upon closer inspection, you heard the squeaking of shoes and the cannon-like sounds of balls slamming the floor. You peeked your head through the door. The only person inside was a boy, no older than you. The first thing you noticed was his oddly dyed hair which resembled a tennis ball. The second was his piercing gaze as he turned his head and stared at you. You jumped. He looked as though he was going to charge at you. Instead, the boy huffed, walked to the other side of the gym, and picked up the ball. You spotted a familiar white and blue jacket on the ground.

“Seijoh?”

The boy turned to you again. “Yeah.” His voice was low, but powerful enough to rumble the earth.

You swallowed. “I go there, too.” This was a waste of time, you thought. You should’ve gone home, and you almost did until he spoke again.

“Never seen you before.”

The ball flew into the air with the boy tailing it. His body bent in a way you didn’t think was possible, face pinched in concentration. It hit his hand then the ground with the loudest smacks you had ever heard. It was incredible, but also scary. He picked up another ball behind him and did the same, and again, and again, until his side was empty and yours was strewn with several blue and yellow volleyballs. The more you watched, the more mesmerized you became.

“Can I stay?” You felt stupid for asking, but if he was trying to concentrate, you didn’t want to disturb him. Surprisingly, he nodded. You sank to the floor with your knees to your chest and listened to the constant thwacks and smacks all night.

You only learned his name a little while after. It was by accident. You were walking by a group of boys at school when one of them called him Mad Dog-chan, and you bit your lip to stop your laughter. Luckily, they didn’t notice. It was kind of cute the more you thought about it. It fit his appearance quite well, too. That night, you found him at the gym once again. Instead of a curt nod, you waved.

“Hey, Mad Dog-chan!”

You immediately regretted your words when he stopped bouncing the ball and flashed you a murderous look. You muttered a hurried apology and sat on the floor in your usual spot. He whacked a ball a couple of times then came over to grab his water bottle. After a few quick gulps, you expected him to get back on the court, but he stared at the spot beside you.

“It’s Kyōtani. Kyōtani Kentarō.”

Some nights, he didn’t practice. You sat in a playground nearby with soda and snacks from home. Originally, they were meant to replenish his energy when he overworked himself. Now, you were the one eating most of them, with Kyōtani nibbling on a custard bun as you wolfed down chip bag after chip bag. One thing you could say with confidence was Kyōtani was a great listener. At first, you sat in awkward silence. Then, you started rattling off all the things you did that day. It led to you talking about anything and everything, including the funny-looking dog you saw on the street last week. You hoped he didn’t think he reminded you of it.

Talking to Kyōtani was equivalent to talking to a wall. If anything, you were talking at him. He barely looked your way, and if you asked a question, he responded with a grunt or a simple, “Yeah.” Even though you wished it was two-sided, it felt good. You could finally break the silence that shrouded you for years, something you yearned to do but never had the confidence to. With Kyōtani, because of how quiet he was, you felt you could say anything without judgment. You did this for a while, rambling to him in the playground while he sat and listened.

Together, you sat on the swings with fruit sandwiches you made earlier that day. Your feet dragged against the sand and dirt as you swung back and forth. It seemed like Kyōtani enjoyed it. You noticed him eyeing your sandwich while licking his lips. You laughed and handed the rest to him. You started your daily tangent; woke up, ate a meat bun for breakfast, went to school, did homework, then came here. Somewhere along the way, you mentioned how you were home alone since your parents had lots of meetings to attend. You wished it was a little more lively. It was why you left the house every night, to find some noise in the suffocating void of it all.

You talked some more about your family, which you never did. You were too distracted to see Kyōtani’s head perk up. He stopped munching on the fruit sandwich and leaned forward, trying to look at your face. You continued to ramble, feeling your irritation slowly rise.

“Am I a bad person? I mean, they’re really nice, and I adore them. But it’s unbearable sometimes, and then I end up feeling like an asshole.”

You let out a dry laugh, ignoring the pain of the metal chains holding up the swing as they dug into your palms. You pressed your lips together in a thin line, unsure of what to say next. You chose to draw circles in the sand with the tip of your shoe.

“I understand how you feel.”

You looked at Kyōtani in surprise. You waited for him to say more, but he didn’t. The night felt a little brighter.

The last thing your “friends” expected was for you to ditch them for him. “Looks like a tennis ball,” one of them said. You chuckled since it was your exact thought when you first met him. You were relieved but also disheartened when they didn’t seem to mind too much. At least you knew where they stood. 

Hanging out with Kyōtani was much different compared to your nights at the gym or the playground. You got lots of stares from the third-years who never thought he could behave like this. Some people in your class whispered about the two lone-wolves banding together. You pretended not to hear.

“You’ve been cheery lately.”

You stared at your mother, trying to process her words. They never asked about you, which you grew to appreciate. It meant not having to force out a conversation. You almost brushed it aside until she spoke again. Your chin rested in your palm as you picked the vegetables on your plate, stomach full with snacks.

“I met a new friend.”

Your mother raised her brows, impressed. “Oh? Tell me about him.”

“How do you know he’s a boy?”

“Just a hunch.”

You sighed, continuing to stir your food. “He’s quiet. A little weird, but he’s nice. I can talk to him about anything.”

“That’s good.”

Your father glanced at her, and she shot him a strange look. Don’t, it said. He backed off and ate as if nothing happened.

You managed to weave yourself with the other boys from the volleyball team. They were a scary bunch at first, most of them glaring at Kyōtani the moment he walked through the door, but they were nice to you. He had left his jacket at the playground one night, and you made a mental note to return it to him the next day. Except, like Kyōtani, you also forgot about it. When you saw the boys flood to the gym for practice, you raced home then back to school and shyly followed a group of girls to the gym who were there to gawk at the captain.

During their break, you nervously approached Kyōtani and poked his shoulder. They watched you return his jacket but didn’t expect his, “Thank you,” afterward. When you left, Oikawa bugged him to invite you back. Kyōtani shrugged. He usually ignored him at all costs. Oikawa took it as a good sign.

Hanging out with them was a lot more fun than you anticipated. They were better than your previous friends, and even though most of them didn’t like Kyōtani, they seemed to be warming up. Your favorite moment was the movie night at Oikawa’s house. The living room was packed, with little room to wiggle, but it was comfortable. That night, you laughed so hard your stomach hurt, and the tensions between you, Kyōtani, and the rest of the boys dissolved. You belonged here.

Yahaba caught him staring at you outside your classroom. You sat across from another classmate, helping her with a few assignments for her art class. You posed and let her take pictures. Some were silly, but the others captured your features perfectly. In one of them, you rested your cheek in your palm with the tip of your pencil wedged between your teeth. You looked at the camera through your lashes as your classmate continued to snap more shots.

“Cool it.” Yahaba clapped him on the shoulder.

“I’m not jealous.”

“Never said you were.”

You helped your classmate pack her things. While you followed her out the door, she twirled a lock of hair around her finger and fiddled with the hem of her skirt. You bid her goodbye as her friends called her over, then turned to Kyōtani and Yahaba. 

“Ready to go?”

Yahaba nodded, as did Kyōtani. You walked ahead of them, listing off that day’s menu. Behind you, Kyōtani’s eyes zeroed in on your moving form, the shift of your hips as you took each step. From an outsider’s perspective, it looked like he was honing in on a kill. Yahaba prodded his arm.

“Don’t be a pervert.”

You swore you heard a slap.

Friday after school, your parents were home from work much earlier than anticipated. A game show played on the television. They barely noticed your arrival until you called out. The TV turned off, and your mother looked over the back of the sofa with a wry smile. Your father drummed his fingers on the arm of the sofa. His eyes stayed glued to the empty screen.

“Welcome back,” your mother greeted. She glanced at the boxes in the kitchen, filled with old plates and cutlery you hadn’t touched in a while. You assumed they were throwing them out.

“So…” she drawled. “What do you think of Tokyo?”

“Tokyo?”

Your hands shook as you set your school bag down on the kitchen table. The boxes made more sense. You remembered your father talking about a school his friend’s son attended. Nekoma, was it? He told you how great it was there, that it’d be easy to make friends in such a populated area.

“Tokyo…” you repeated. A heavy lump formed in your throat. “It seems… nice. Why do you ask?” You couldn’t stop the waver in your voice. Your mother caught on too.

“Dad’s company moved areas. It’s a big shift, but it’s too good to lose. So-”

“We’re moving.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“But you were about to.” 

Your head hung over the table. There was a crushing weight in your chest. Of course they wouldn’t tell you. They never did. It was too much to not expect this betrayal. If you told them how happy you were at Seijoh, maybe things would’ve been different. I could’ve prevented this. You shook your head. You couldn’t stop an entire company from moving, nor could you convince your father to find a new job in Miyagi. You had to follow them like you always did.

“If we can stay, we will, but most likely-”

“I’ll start packing.”

You grabbed your school bag and stomped to your room, vision obscured by your tears. Why now? Why did it have to be when you were starting to fit in, when you found real friends who made you happier than ever? Just when things looked like they were turning around, you were back at square one. You’d be there for a while, stuck in a new city far away from Seijoh. If you were with your old group, you wouldn’t have been this upset. But to not see them again—Yahaba, Hanamaki, even Oikawa.

You opened your phone and stared at the lock screen: a picture of you and Kentarō from the movie night at Oikawa’s. His arm was slung over your shoulder, a scowl on his face, but the peace sign he held up made it worth it. You remembered taking it and everyone gasping that Kentarō would even allow anyone to take a picture of him, let alone save it. Your heart fluttered. When did he stop being Kyōtani and become Kentarō?

Kentarō faced the empty playground. He sat in the right swing as he always did, scanning the area for any sign of you. In his hand was his attempt at a fruit sandwich, messily covered in cellophane with whipped cream oozing between the bread. A bandaid wrapped the tip of his finger where he accidentally cut himself. Damn those strawberries.

Kentarō kicked at the dirt. He waited, and waited some more, but after twenty minutes, you didn’t show. He pulled out his phone and sent you a quick text. Your absence made his skin crawl. His phone lit up with a response. Sorry, was all you said.

He couldn’t shake the heaviness as he trudged home.

The view outside the window gave you an excuse to be distracted. The voices of the boys were loud, but you chose to focus on the birds circling the courtyard. Two of them swooped down and landed on the thick branch of an old tree. They ruffled their feathers and nuzzled their beaks. You saw your old friends walk out of the main building. The one who introduced you to the gym glanced up. His eyes met yours momentarily. He went back to talking to someone you didn’t recognize and led them to the other side of the campus.

You stared out the window until Mattsun shook your shoulder. You turned and put on a faux smile. Your classwork was still strewn across your desk even though it was lunch. A few drops of chili sauce had landed on your math homework. You scowled at Hanamaki, his face stuffed with food.

“Oops.”

You wiped it off with an eye roll then stuffed it into your bag along with your other notebooks.

“What’s buggin’ ya?” Mattsun asked. 

You shrugged. “Nothing. I’m ready for the day to end.” It was the last thing you wanted. There was a bit of time before you left for Tokyo, but the countdown moved fast. You ignored Mattsun’s opposing look and ate. They couldn’t know yet.

Kentarō knew there was more than what met the eye, but he bit his tongue. He was paranoid, he told himself. The guilty look on your face as the boys laughed, unaware of the shift in attitude, said otherwise. He threw his arm over the back of your chair. You relaxed, but the sad look remained. Remembering the fruit sandwich he made, Kentarō grabbed it from his bag and slid it across your desk. You raised your brows.

“What’s this?”

“I made it.”

You unwrapped the sticky mess of whipped cream and strawberry jam. Kentarō watched you take a small bite, followed by a bigger one.

“This is delicious!”

He showed you the tip of his finger. “The price I paid for it.”

Your knees knocked against his under your desk. He flinched. You pressed your finger to your lips, then to the bandaid. “Thank you. Hope it feels better.”

Your cheeks swelled as you took more bites than you could chew. Pink syrup stuck to the corner of your mouth. Cute, Kentarō thought.

“What was that?” you mumbled. A crumb lodged itself in your throat. Mattsun rushed over and slapped you so hard on the back it echoed. A handful of other students looked over. Hanamaki scolded you for gulping down your bottle of water without taking any breaths. Kentarō cheeks turned a darker shade than the strawberries when you gripped his arm for support. You didn’t ask again.

“Cute,” he whispered anyway. He knew you wouldn’t hear over Mattsun’s teasing. “You’re cute.”

Kentarō invited you to the movies. He planned on having it at home, but his parents occupied the TV, and his laptop was too small to enjoy anything. He met you at a plaza a walking distance’s away. He let you pick the movie, curious about your tastes. Action? Romcom? When he looked at his ticket, it was for the latest horror movie. Critics raved about it, calling it the best of the decade. Impressive.

The movie started a while ago. The critics were right, it was scary, a lot scarier than he expected. You enjoyed it like a comedy movie, clapping your hand over your mouth when the entire theater shrieked at the killer, including Kentarō.

“You’re a sadist,” he whispered.

“Am not, just think it’s funny.”

He shook his head. Another jumpscare happened, this time worse than before. Several people jolted in their seats and bits of popcorn flew into the air. Kentarō didn’t realize he had sank into his seat—your seat, actually—until you nudged his foot with yours.

“Scared?” Your breath was warm against his ear.

“Sorry.”

You patted his hand which clutched the armrest with a vice grip. Kentarō’s heart beat faster.

“It’s okay,” you said. “I’m right here.”

The movie ended and the lights switched on. People left the theater with wobbly legs and pale faces. You headed to the exit holding your empty cups and popcorn bags with Kentarō in tow. He wished the movie was longer. Not because he enjoyed it, but because the smile on your face made it worth it.

Your room was bare besides your bed and desk. Most of your stuff was packed neatly in the many cardboard boxes piled inside your now empty closet. It’d been a few weeks since that Friday, and you still hadn’t told Kentarō or any of the boys. You weren’t sure how to break the news. He noticed how clingy you became, tailing him wherever he went at school. Not that he minded. You talked less at the playground. It was him who filled the silence instead, though his daily recaps weren’t as interesting as yours.

Next week was the last with Kentarō. In your shaky hands was an envelope, the edges indented from how hard you gripped it. You took out the letter inside, read it over, then slipped it back in. You thought about sealing it for the umpteenth time that day. Before your tongue swiped against the flap, you quickly scanned over the letter once more as if the words would disappear. You’d seal it later, you told yourself.

Your over-the-top cheeriness was so evident it was painful. They asked what was up, and you said you were simply having a good day. Kentarō knew better than that. At lunch, when you were away from everyone else, he prodded your shoulder and asked what was wrong. You frowned at him, then smiled.

“Everything's fine.”

Before he could probe further, you grabbed his wrist and led him to the cafeteria.

“There’s chicken! It’s your favorite, right?”

Something slipped out of your pocket. Kentarō thought it was your school notes. He bent down to pick it up and saw it was a white envelope, unsealed. You were already gone, dragged away by his teammates. He didn’t want to pry, but curiosity got the best of him. Turning the other direction, he grabbed the note inside. His name at the top caught his eye.

Dear Kyōken-chan,

He snorted.

Sorry for not telling you this sooner. I’m still trying to process this too.

A crease formed on his forehead as he squinted. The letter was quite long, the handwriting messy. He repeated the phrases in his head over and over, but he couldn’t fully understand what they meant. He flipped it to the back and sighed when there was more. He decided to scan it this time, except a handful of words made him reread it in depth.

“Kentarō!” In your arms were several wrapped buns from the cafeteria. He tried to stuff the note into his pocket, but you already saw.

“Oh.” The buns fell to the ground. “Oh no.”

Kentarō’s face was a mix of frustration and hurt. The hand holding the letter shook, the other balled in a fist. You wanted to run, but if you moved, you swore you’d collapse.

“(Y/N),” he murmured. “What is this?”

A weary laugh escaped your lips. “Um. Can we go somewhere else?”

Not waiting for an answer, you grabbed his wrist and led him to the school’s courtyard.

“One week,” he huffed.

“One week.”

You sat beneath a large, shady tree in the farthest corner away from the main building. Kentarō rubbed his temple and sighed. He held onto your letter. You fiddled with your fingers in your lap.

“For how long?”

“Probably forever. Not literally, but it’ll feel like it.”

“So you’re graduating from Nekoma?”

You nodded. Kentarō tapped his knuckles against his cheek.

“Wished you told me sooner.”

You blinked at him wearily. “You’re not mad?”

He shook his head then turned away. You grew quiet for a moment. He took it as his chance to butt in.

“So, you like me?”

“It’s all in the letter.”

“I want to hear you say it.”

You looked away. Your hands were clammy, and the air felt ten times hotter. The word you used was stronger, much stronger than he anticipated. It made his cheeks burn and a smile threatened to pull at his lips. He wanted to hear it come to life.

“I love you, Kentarō.”

It sounded sweet, almost tooth-rotting sweet. Kentarō chewed the inside of his cheek. He liked you, he really did. He just wasn’t sure if it was the right moment to say it. Would there be a right moment? After this week, you’d be in Tokyo in another school—a rival school, to make matters worse. He wanted his words to hold weight, and in that moment, they didn’t. Not as much as he wished.

“If you don’t feel the same, I understand.”

“I do.”

You opened your mouth to speak, but the bell cut you off. Kentarō hoisted himself from the ground then held his hand out. His palm was rough under yours, but his touch was gentle. Once you got to your feet, you let go, but he kept his pinky locked with yours.

Friday arrived quickly. Sadness filled the air as you said your goodbyes, thanking your classmates and teachers for the short, but pleasant year. After school, the team led you to the gym with your eyes covered. The boys’ gym was decorated with a banner and a table with food. There was even a cake, the word Seijoh iced and crossed out on top. You let out a hearty laugh before inviting the boys to dig in.

“Of course,” said Oikawa. “I paid for it.”

On one side, Mattsun smeared frosting over Hanamaki’s cheek. On the other, Oikawa tried to spoon-feed Iwaizumi only to be smacked on the head. You sat on the floor next to Kentarō and looked around with a big smile. His thumb reached out to wipe a dollop of frosting from the corner of your mouth. The phrase, “Time flies when you’re having fun,” held up its end of the bargain. When you looked outside, the sun had begun to set.

You thanked your friends, took one last photo, and managed to hold in your tears until your walk home. You promised to visit and to cheer them on at nationals, even if you were on Nekoma’s side. They laughed, waved with sad smiles, then watched you leave.

Kentarō caught up with you a third of the way home. His hand slipped into yours, a habit he recently picked up. It wouldn’t last much longer. You stopped a few houses down from yours. You didn’t want to let go, not yet.

You learned many things this year. One, life wasn’t fair. It never was. Two, people weren’t as shitty as you thought, proven in your new friendships. Three, seeing Kentarō cry made your heart ache in a way you never wanted to feel again. His head fell against your shoulder with a hard thump, tears soaking through the uniform you’d wear for the last time. You rubbed his back and pressed your lips to the top of his head.

“Stay,” he pleaded.

“I wish I could.”

“Please don’t go.”

“I have to.”

Kentarō looked up through his watery lashes. Your lips connected. Who initiated it was a mystery. His kiss was slow but fervent. You leaned in, deepening it until you swore your teeth clashed. Kentarō’s hands rested on your hips, yours on the nape of his neck. His kisses were magnetizing, drawing you closer with each movement. You broke apart for air, foreheads pressed together. He still had tears in his eyes, and so did you. You stayed like that for a bit, wrapped in each other’s arms until you knew you had to let go.

“Call me everyday, please,” he whispered.

“I promise. I swear on my life.” 

You kissed him again. 

“Goodbye, Kentarō. I love you.”

“Goodbye, (Y/N). I’ll be waiting.”

“So will I.”

Kentarō didn’t say it, but he didn’t have to. You knew he loved you, proven by his daily text messages and calls thereafter. Even if it only lasted a couple of seconds, you never missed a day. Sometimes, you heard his teammates' voices in the background. The audio would become crackly before a new voice replaced your boyfriend’s: Mattsun, Yahaba, Oikawa, and even Iwaizumi. 

Boyfriend. The fact made your stomach fill with butterflies. Kentarō was yours, and you were his.

It’d been months since you last saw him in person. You finished your second-year at Nekoma, a school that welcomed you with open arms. You met lots of people, found new friends, but the boys from Seijoh never left your mind. The picture you took hung on the wall of your new bedroom, a space you were still getting used to. Summer vacation was here, and you promised to come home to Miyagi for a week or two. On the train, you checked your phone to see how many kilometers were left. Just a few more minutes.

When it came to a halt, you burst from your seat, duffle bag in tow. You sent Kentarō a text, only to be face-to-face with him the moment the doors opened. You leapt into his arms, knocking him back a few steps. His chin rested on your shoulder as you hugged, swaying side to side.

“I missed you so much, Ken.”

“Missed you, too.”

Your fingers clasped around his, resting perfectly in the dips between his knuckles. Hopefully, he hadn’t dropped his habit. The months you were apart flew by, but they were also the longest you had ever witnessed. Seeing Kentarō for the first time in a while felt like a breath of cool, fresh air.

You tugged on his wrist, ready to head to town. He stayed put.

“What is it?”

“I love you.”

He grinned shyly at you. Kentarō brought color into your dull life, your source of noise in the thick silence. The summer wouldn’t forever, and you had another year left to endure. But as long as he was there, even kilometers away, you’d get through it together.

Intoxicated. (18+)

The Request: 

𝑨𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓'𝒔 𝑵𝒐𝒕𝒆 | I’m so sorry anon, usually I finish the whole fic before adding the author’s note, and I’m now realizing that I read your request wrong. I think you meant to have Gojo and Reader as friends but uh... I kinda wrote this as the opposite? It’s more of a Popular Gojo x Loner Reader. I hope this still fits your tastes because otherwise I followed everything you asked for, you’re welcome to request more and I’ll write them PERFECTLY I swear. Also can ya’ll tell I’m bad at choosing titles LMFAO 𝑷𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 | College Student! Dom! Gojo x Drunk! Sub! (as per usual..) Reader 𝑾𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝑪𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕 | 3808 𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 | Suggestions of Rape (Nothing Happens Though, Also I’m Not Sure If That’s The Correct Choice of Wording...), Fluff, Oral (Male Receiving), Somewhat Public, Hair Pulling,  𝑺𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 | After attending a party due to some persistent begging from a friend, hopeful for Gojo Satoru, your long-time crush to come, you turn back empty-handed. That’s what you thought, though. Eventually he comes around and helps you in more ways then one.

           The thumping of bass was all you could hear.      Loud drunken cheering, chatter amidst the scene. Poorly discarded red solo cups littered the floor and the tables, and at the corner of your eye you could see a heap of college students piled up on top of each other, snoring.     You impatiently tap your foot against the sticky floor, most likely due to the uncleaned spilt drinks. You weren’t exactly fond of college parties. Most of the time nothing occurred, and besides, you had your eyes set on a certain man, so you weren’t quite looking for a quick night. But you had come regardless, since your friend had begged and eventually convinced you to.     Scanning the crowd once more, hopeful, you curse under your breath as you come out of your search unsuccessful once more. Not even a glimpse of Gojo Satoru, someone that always attended crazy parties, and this party was high on the scale of crazy. This had to be the most depressingly boring party you’ve ever attended.     But if you weren’t here to shamelessly stalk Satoru, or socialize, you had to do a bit of drinking, or else what would be the point?    Walking towards the alcohol was the last thing you wanted to do. Hordes of intoxicated students were blatantly making out with each other, drinks left untouched and probably forgotten, not to mention just the overall anxiety you would get to be so caught up in the life of the party.     “Yooo... ‘S that you, (Y/N)?” you heard a familiar drunken voice even through the loud music, and you whip around, glad to have some form of escape from the awkwardness.    You were hesitant to approach your friend, you knew they were the friendly type, and that was only exemplified during drinking.    “Yup, that’s me!” you smile awkwardly, setting your empty cup down on the table.     “Agh. Fuck.” your friend groaned, stumbling onto you, sloppily catching themselves using your shoulders. “Sorry... Long night. Holy shit (Y/N), didn’t think you’d actually fucking come out and party. Nice to see you... Fuck-” brushing off a pair girls dancing wildly from their shoulder, your friend cleared their throat.    You try not to make a face, and instead direct your attention to the crowd on the opposite end of the room, hoping this was enough to tell your friend that you weren’t exactly looking for a conversation.    “...Fuck... What was I saying..? Oh yeahhhh, glad to see ya out here hermit. I’ll pour your drink~! How’s class going?”     Clumsily fumbling with your cup, you had subconsciously picked it back up, your fingers itching to fidget with it and pretend your friend wasn’t there at all. Turning to face your friend again, a grin playing at your lips, hoping you looked friendly. “No that’s fine! I’ll do it myself, I’m way less drunk then you are. Why don’t you go sit down?” You mentally facepalm. Of course they wouldn’t get your body language, they were literally drunk.     Your friend grinned boldly, “Hey, you said it, not me~ You can leave anytime though... Guy named Gojo Satoru coming soon... Makes all the parties go wild. Ladies love him. Probably not your style though, eh?”     You don’t reply, instead watching your friend nod at you, perhaps as a way of saying goodbye when they couldn’t do it normally. Taking sluggish strides to mix back in with the crowd of people, unintelligibly rambling about something you presumed was about Gojo Satoru. You wave at them as they blended into the blur of faces.    It takes a moment to register everything that was just said. Your heart pounding, you turn to face the variety of alcohol instead, finally settling on some cheap beer, since you had no idea what the rest was, yet you weren’t quite thinking about the quality of the alcohol you were drinking.    You were looking down at the selection of drinks, but your mind wasn’t thinking about that at all.     You had thought your luck really was shit, but that didn’t appear to be the case any longer.     Your brain was thinking quicker then your hands could catch up, spilling the canned liquid onto the table instead of your cup, but that wasn’t what you were thinking about right now.      Setting the can down without another thought, you take a long sip, enjoying the ice cold beverage, your mouth going numb with every swig. Usually you’d throw up at the slightest thought of the after taste of beer, but that didn’t matter. Right now, all that was in your world was your red solo cup, the cheep booze inside of it, and whenever the hell Gojo Satoru would arrive.      The likelihood of him noticing you was probably in the negatives, you were a wall flower, an average college student, but him? He probably had a part-time job as a super model, or perhaps a fitness trainer. Strong toned arms, always a smug smirk on his face, strikingly white hair, and those damned circular shades.      Shaking your head, you pour another can of beer into your cup, feeling yourself go numb and ignoring the thoughts going rampant in your head. The only thing to distance yourself from these thoughts were to drink yourself to sleep, seeing as everyone else was doing the same thing, or call an Uber.      Unfortunately, that probably had a lower probability of Gojo taking an interest in you. You were, of course, a broke college student living off of pre-packaged noodles and relatively cheap dishes. It would be more likely to crash at your friends place.      You weren’t quite the drinker, much less experienced with the booze. You felt your knees wobble, and a strong urge to throw up at the back of your throat. You shouldn’t have overdrank.      Leaving your cup on the table, you shrugged your way towards the exit, murmuring (or rather slurring) polite excuse me’s and sorry’s, Stumbling your way towards the door, you were just now realizing that people were even now still coming into the party. You desperately needed fresh air, the atmosphere in the party was too hectic, too crazy, too stuffy.      As soon as you stepped an inch away from the interior, you drew in a long much needed sigh, every breath coming out as a cloud of fog.      The night was quiet and still, and you finally felt like you could vomit your guts away in peace.      Walking over to the nearest trashcan you can find, you vomited as much as you could, feeling lighter as soon as it all left your system.      Turning back towards the house, you still found yourself stumbling and struggling to walk normally. Wiping your mouth with your sleeve, you refused to look this stupid returning back to the house, figuring you could take a few more breathers.       Taking another deep breath in, without even beginning to mention your surroundings, confidently taking long strides. You knocked into someone, headfirst into their chest.    Cursing under your breath, you squint your eyes, this person was incredibly tall, you noted. Remnants of expensive smelling cologne clouded your sense of smell.    “...Sorry.” you mumbled, still struggling to see who this was due to the darkness.      “Hey. No problem girly, you seem drunk, you okay?” yet another familiar voice, yet you hadn’t heard it quite as often as your friend.      “Huh...? Uh, yeah... I think.” giving him a dopey smile, you couldn’t remember who this guy was for some reason.      “Yo Gojo! Who’s this chick?”      Immediately swiveling your head towards the direction of the voice, it came to your attention that you had seen the guy on campus hanging out with Gojo quite often. Turning back up to the guy towering over you, beads of sweat formulated on your forehead, you gulp, the confidence you got while drinking evaporated into thin air. A toothy sly grin on his handsome facial features,  you don’t even know if your heart rate is dropping to the negatives or skyrocketing.      This was the actual real Gojo Satoru. The egotistical bastard.     Stifiling an eep, you try to respond, attempting to say you were in-fact not his affirmative, “chick”.      “Chill, Geto, just some drunk girl. Hey, you go ahead with the party, I think I’ll help her.” he said, waving at whoever Geto was.      “Gojo, again? You’ve done this shit like 4 times, you want pussy that bad... Yo!” he raised his arms up as soon as Gojo shot daggers at him. “Dude, come enjoy yourself when you can, okay? Was just a joke.” Geto mumbled, you heard a few goodbye’s and words of agreement, and then the atmosphere was still once again.       “You seem really drunk. I don’t think being alone is good.” his eyebrows knitted together. Placing a firm hand on your forehead. “which fucking sucks honestly. Here, let’s go back inside sweets. You’re heating up.”      Seemingly forgetting every language you’ve ever learned, you instead look back at him in awe.      He laughed, putting his arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer to him. “Here, I’ll help you walk. If worse comes to worse, I’ll fucking carry you, yeah? Nothing to be worried about, who doesn’t wanna flex that they were carried by Gojo fucking Satoru? They don’t call me the greatest for nothing~!” he sang.      “You’re real?” you breathed, immediately covering your mouth following suit. Wishing you had the confidence like this sober.      He raised an eyebrow, looking down at you, taking long strides that you couldn’t quite catch up with. “Yeah, I’m real, don’t walk into that you’re gonna faceplant into a car.”

    “I think I’ve seen you before in one of my classes, humanities maybe?” he added, turning you back into the party, you heard the loud thumping music once again.      It was in fact humanities, but you couldn’t quite tell him you always marveled at him every lecture, so instead you flutter your eyelashes. “...Uh yeah... I think I remember you too.”     Before he could say anything back, you hear the steadily increase of a deafening combination of party music and loud screams and chatter.      “Yo Gojo! Got a new girl? Thought you were dating some chick named Utahime?”      “Yo! Nah, just helpin’ this girl, and no I am not dating Utahime-”      “Is that fucking Gojo Satoru? Yo! Over here, shots? Geto’s here too!”      This guy was popular, obviously. These were also top-notch names within the small college’s community, yet here you were under his arm, and not one person knew your name. Everyone just referred to you as just a girl. This probably wasn’t new to Gojo then, so you weren’t special.     You felt your heart drop.      Once again, you were in your own world, and you never felt like a burden more then now.      “Hey, where are the rooms?”      You look up from furiously studying the floor, and you realize he’s talking to your friend, tapping at their shoulder.       “Huh? Oh my god... Gojo, I thought you didn’t make it~! Want a drink?” they lifted up their red solo cup to Gojo’s lips, an easygoing smile plastered onto their face.      “Nah. Where are the rooms?” Gojo asked with a slightly impatient tone, now rhythmically drumming his fingers against your shoulder with one hand, the other shoving the cup away from his face.       “Damn, my guy.” your friend wiped their lips before speaking, their arm slack. “You’re intent... Yeah down the hallway, left, there’s some spare condoms somewhere...”       “(Y/N)? I didn’t even realize... You’re gonna fuck my boy Satoru over here?” they slapped a hand on his shoulder.      “Wha? No of course not.. Uh... He’s...” everything came out as unintelligible babble, you felt your cheeks go warm.       “She’s probably not an experienced drinker, just looking out for her to be honest. No fucking, just want to make sure she’s safe for the time being. I’ll join you later, yeah?” Gojo chirped, reassuringly patting your friend’s shoulder back.     “Shit, say less Satoru. See ya~”  your friend waved before turning their back on the two of you, striking up a random conversation with the people who just so happened to be nearby.      As you both walked down the hallway in quiet, you look up at him, grateful for the not as noisy room.      “U-Uh.. Thank you..” you murmured, “I can speak though, you know..”      He chuckled, “As fucking if, I just have experience with drunk people, I can usually tell what they’re saying when others can’t. You sounded like a crackhead back there.” fidgeting with the bedroom’s doorknob, he finally unlocked it.      “You’re mean! How do I know you’re not gonna... You know!” you retorted, collapsing on the bed without another thought, relishing the plush mattress.       “Thanks babe, if it makes you feel any better I can pull any chick within a 500 mile radius. I don’t need to resort to such cowardly and criminal shit.” he yawned, grunting before placing his shades on the nightstand, laying down next to you. “I’ll even leave the door wide open if it makes you feel safe.”       Reassured, you relaxed your body, staring at the blank ceiling. Your body felt numb and you couldn’t quite think straight.      “How’d you know I was in humanities?” you slurred, still staring at the ceiling.      “I see you all the time, you sit near me and have some cute stationary.” putting both of his hands at the back of his head, his eyes turned to look at yours, his neck twisting as he did so.      Immediately, the first thought you think of even in your intoxicated state was how beautiful his eyes were. Like rare diamonds mined from the deepest caves, placed delicately into someone’s eyes by some divine being. A strikingly vivid bright blue. It was a little on the lighter shade, but so, so beautiful.      “Pretty..” you struggle to restrain yourself, but you can’t help it, instead staring at him, eye-to-eye.       “Yeah? Just like you, sweets. I thought we were talking about cute stationary?” you couldn’t quite tell if what he just said was a joke or not, but you really didn’t want to find out. You felt your heart burst.       “...Really?” you breathed, ignoring his previous statement, lifting your legs upwards to wrap your arm around them.       “You’re pretty. Why else do you think I’d notice you in lectures?” he paused, and even you can tell he seemed slightly nervous, a slight quiver to his lips. “honestly, whenever I’m bored I just kinda look at you. You’re cute, what can I say?” Gojo added.      Unable to respond, you instead looked up at him, you felt like a blood vessel was going to pop, or your heart, whichever one was first.      Scooching closer to you, he placed a hand on your neck, breathing heavily. “Hey, I’m not lying. You’re genuinely pretty, sugar, you know? Yeah we haven’t talked to each other often, but I’ve always thought you were cute and I’ve heard things about you.”     “You’re fucking with me, aren’t you?” that was all you could pathetically muster. “Is that the joke?”       “When a cute chick is on the line, I don’t lie.” he assured you, pursing his lips.      Seeing him so up close was nerve-wrecking, so perfect, he looked like was sculpted with marble. A part of you wished you weren’t drunk, so you wouldn’t look as stupid. “I think you’re cute too.” you whispered.      For a moment, it went quiet. So quiet that you could hear the loud music and the wild party once again, but you don’t dare interrupt. It takes everything inside of you to not break eye contact, your stomach a butterfly exhibit.      “I like you.” he finally said, you couldn’t sense a damn sarcastic tone. “Bet you’re gonna doubt that too.” snickering, he ran his hand through his hair, but you swear you see him bite his lip. Sexual or something he did subconsciously, you weren’t quite sure.     Time stopped. This was way too far to be a troll, but what if it still was? You didn’t know, the stupid small thought never went away, you looked at him dumbfounded instead. Snapping out of your daze, you ask, “...But we haven’t talked a whole bunch.”      “I know that. I don’t know, I guess I liked the idea of the competition. You don’t throw yourself at me, and sure other girls don’t do that as well-” he trailed off, before finishing his sentence, “but I think there’s a lot of positive traits that I like in you, and you’re just.. Really pretty. I guess I don’t want to throw you away like what I do with other girls?”      Before you could speak, he cuts you off again, this time a tad frantic. “But you know- Listen, I know it seems like I fuck around with girls a lot, but I’m looking to change that. I know I don’t seem very genuine now, but I think I’d like to try something with you specifically. You don’t even have to say anything back, just leave if you don’t want to, and if you do I’m sorry for disturbing your night-”      Maybe it was how intoxicated you are, or how you suddenly felt a burst of confidence, but you kiss him, and you kiss him hard. His breath hitched while you rolled on top of his chest. You’re desperate to have contact between your skin and his. He kissed you back, shyly at first, soft and delicate, but that didn’t last for long.      Heat rose to your cheeks, you were rusty with your kissing, but he wasn’t. The smell of his cologne was tantalizing, he kissed you like he wasn’t ever shy to begin with. One hand under your neck, propping you up towards him, the other groping your breast. Parting your lips, feeling him explore you just briefly before slipping back out as soon as it started.      You felt him unhook your bra with relative ease, and you can’t control the flutter within. Still kissing you sloppily, Gojo shuddered and you could tell there was a sound at the back of the throat. Moan, grunt, growl, you couldn’t tell. Slipping his hand away from your breast momentarily, he hastily yanked your top off your body.      Pulling away from the kiss not too long afterwards, he licked his lips, panting, you find yourself catching your breath too.       “Sit up.” he ordered, and you did as you were told, looking up at him with eyes that practically said, “What’s next?”      “Look at you. So cute.” cupping your breasts with his hands, you gasp at how hot they are, sweating just a bit, his thumbs brushed briefly against your nipples, giving them slight twirls before finally kissing both of your mounds.      “Let’s be nice and light today, okay pumpkin? Nothing too serious.” you gaze up at him, now standing and unbuckling his designer belt, unbuttoning his jeans which dropped to the floor afterwards, an obvious bulge in his boxers.      “...The door’s still open. Close it.” you suggest, your eyes still intent on his bulge, you don’t try to hide licking your lips.      “The world needs to know who’s mine tonight. Fuck that.” he smirked devilishly before also tugging his boxers down, exposing his dick.      Now, you weren’t quite expecting that he was packing this much, but he was. You easily estimated 7 inches, maybe more, you didn’t know. A pale flush pink at the very tip, veins adorned his length. Fairly girthy, and you loved it.      “Off the bed, on your knees.”      Scrambling off of the bed, you immediately look upwards and kiss the tip. He hummed, looking down at you with watchful eyes. You didn’t care if someone saw the two of you like this, in fact you’d love it.       You instantly put your hands to work, pumping his length, making sure that you were making eye-contact. Giving playful licks along the sides whilst doing so, you note his panting is getting heavier, so you must be doing something right. Your tongue quickly darted out of your mouth to lick your lips, before suckling the tip, just as a tease.      He growled, yanking at your hair so that you were looking directly up at him once again. “Don’t tease me, sweetheart. Or you’ll see what happens.”       Letting go of your locks, with one last look at his face you engulfed his rock hard cock, slightly drooling. Once in a while, you took a risky peek at Gojo’s face, predatory and lustful eyes staring back directly at you. Grunting, he twitched in your mouth, and you brace yourself.       “Fuck, (Y/N). You’re so good with your mouth.” he breathed. You groaned in an attempt to communicate, since your mouth was so stuffed full. Precum leaked from his dick, and you bobbed up and down once more. Taking another breath in, tears began to form at the corner of your eyes. You choked a little, but you were doing well for someone who didn’t suck dick very often.      Bracing yourself for a flashflood of cum from him, your mouth worked up and down on his length before you heard a loud groan, signaling that he had came, his eyes squeezed shut, the orgasm completely wracked his body. You found yourself with a mouthful of cum, and you struggle to swallow, before doing it successfully.      You look up to him, panting, some cum had escaped your mouth, splattering onto the floor. He looked you up and down, before opening his arms out for you, beckoning for you to come forth.      “Come here, you looked so pretty doing all that. Such a good girl.” pulling you in closer to his chest, he laid down with a huff, hugging you now. Gojo’s hand rubbed up and down your bare, sweaty back, in a state of euphoria, you don’t do much other then giggle.      “I’m so glad I can call you mine now, pumpkin.” he smiles, before giving you a quick kiss on the forehead.      “Wait... We’re dating now?’ your head shot up, in shock.      “Yes. Dummy. Fuck it, let’s just crash here tonight, your friend won’t mind.” he tousled your hair, taking another deep breath in. “Let’s sleep together.”       “Again?”       “I mean it in a literal sense.” he rolled his eyes.       “.....You guys can fuck here.” a familiar voice rang out from the hallway, you hear a murmur of thanks as the voice became closer and closer, but you’re too tired to move.      “We never closed the door.” you say hazily, digging your face closer into his chest.      He grumbles in response, and you can’t tell what he’s saying.      “..Ah nope- Looks like that room is occupied by Gojo and...” your friend’s eyes looked down, before looking back up in terror. “(Y/N)?”     They looked back down at the ground, their eyes lighting up as soon as they realized what was on it: cum splatters and clothes.     You’re too intoxicated to care, though.     

the struggle bus

summary: spencer is the kindest human alive, which makes things tough for the reader :/ (spencer reid x fem!reader)

word count: 5.3k (a doozy kinda!)

warnings: i guess angst, but really just idiots in love (my fav trope). reader is kind of a hot mess. also, mention of overdose via multivitamin.

author’s note: hi, it’s been approx 4000 years since i last posted, but it’s just because i have no concept of ‘efficiency’ or ‘speed.’ but it’s okay. some of this is good, some of this is eh, make of that what you will. also, this is supposed to be #funny sometimes so uhhhh, keep that in mind. ALSO, the title is majorly stupid, but it was the title of the google doc, and i couldn’t think of anything else......anyways, love u!

For once, the bullpen was quiet.

Spencer was immersed in some case file, doing some work that you should have probably been doing as well, but it was approaching the late hours of the night, and you would barely be able to keep your eyes open if you came even close to trying to read or write. Your desks were situated against each other, so you shifted your gaze across the small divider to him. His sharp features were softened in the lamplight, a sight that tugged on your heartstrings, and you took a moment to just look at him. Most everyone else was gone or was too focused on getting their work done to pay attention to your reverie. Derek, if he were here, would dub you as ‘lovesick’ and shoot mischievous smirks and wiggling eyebrows in your direction, but luckily for you, he was not. Twisting carelessly in your chair with your feet propped on the desk, you chewed absentmindedly on a pen, lost deep in thought. “Hey, Spencer?”

“Yeah?” He continued scribbling on the file without so much as a glance towards you, but that was perfectly fine by you, more time for not-creepy staring.

“How many of my vitamins do you think I could eat before I died?”

At this, he furrowed his brow and neatly laid his pen down.

“That depends on what vitamin you’re taking. If you’re talking about iron supplements, the limit is somewhere around 20mg of elemental iron per kilogram of body weight. Any more than that will have incredibly unpleasant side effects like abdominal pain, persistent vomiting, rapid breathing, and coma. However, if you’re talking about Vitamin C, it’s virtually impossible to overdose, but you might get a bad headache if you supersede 2000 mg.”

“Okay, what about my gummy vitamins?”

He narrowed his eyes at you. “While it still depends on what vitamins are included, eating a whole bottle of your typical multivitamin could easily result in death.”

You mulled this over. “So, I should definitely not go home and eat the rest of my gummy vitamins tonight?”

Spencer chuckled, “I’m not a medical doctor, but yes, I’d recommend that you don’t do that.”

Tossing your head back and letting out a small groan, you protested, “But Spencer, my gummy vitamins taste so good! And I have no food at home, so I guess I either die by overdose on gummy multivitamins or starvation.”

He couldn’t help but grin at your melodrama. It could be 12:06 in the morning, and you could still somehow make him laugh. He was starting to understand that he was in too deep, but he also had the startling realization that he didn’t mind drowning if it was in you. 

“You’ve got quite the predicament on your hands there, (Y/N). Maybe you should go grocery shopping with me the next time I suggest it, so you don’t end up in this situation again.”

“Oh my god, dude!” you moaned. “I told you I was actually busy; I had to take Oscar to the vet for his vaccines! I try to be a good mother to my dog, and you know I’m not an anti-vaxxer. I’d never decline time with my favorite guy without a good reason.”

Spencer’s heart was doing somersaults at the thought of him being your favorite guy. He’d won plenty of awards and medals in his lifetime, but somehow, none of those measured up to the accomplishment of being your favorite. Pride and butterflies boiled in his stomach. 

“Alright, fine, I’ll let it slide this time.”

You snorted, “I appreciate your unmatched benevolence, Dr. Reid.” Locking eyes with him, you tried to dampen the lava flow of heat in your chest that erupted when he looked at you with the softest expression you’d ever seen, but you failed miserably. You had to clear your throat and look away; it was becoming all too much. “Hey, I’m gonna run to the restroom. Don’t leave without me!”

As you dashed away, a thought crossed Spencer’s mind, and he stood up and set off down the opposite hallway.

You returned a few minutes later to an empty bullpen which made you frown, and your heart sank. You had thought he was going to wait, but guess not. Sighing, you tried to not let it sting too badly when you noticed a light on in JJ’s office. You knocked and pushed the already ajar door with a quick hello? before being met with an exhausted-looking JJ.

“Hey, (Y/N). I thought everyone had left by now.”

“Nope, not quite yet,” you replied, offering a weak smile. JJ noticed and wrote it off as fatigue. “You didn’t happen to see Spencer leave a couple minutes ago, did you?”

“Uh, no, I thought he’d gone too.”

“Hm, okay, thanks anyway!”

You prepared to leave, but she stopped you, cocking her head. “Why do you ask? Is he still here?”

Leaning your head against the doorframe, you sighed. “I’m not sure. He was here when I went to the bathroom, but he wasn’t at his desk when I came back. I’m a little disappointed. We always walk out together because we’re both afraid of the parking garage at night.”

A grin simmered on JJ’s face at that fact. “Well, I could walk you out if you’d like?”

“Nah, that’s okay; I don’t want to bother you.”

There was something behind JJ’s eyes you couldn’t identify as she replied, “Alright, then. Just let me know if you change your mind.” She definitely wasn’t thinking about how you didn’t want her intruding on a you-and-Spencer tradition. Not that she minded! She’d been rooting for you both since the minute you’d stepped into the BAU, and Spencer had looked like he was about ready to melt into the floor at the sight of such a pretty girl.

“Thanks, Jayje.”

Dragging your feet a little, you made your way back to your desk to gather your things, trying to fend off the disappointment. You had gotten your jacket on and were about to pick up your bag when you heard a (Y/N)! from down the hall. Well, that was certainly not JJ. Hesitantly, you called out, “Spencer?”

He finally emerged with his arms loaded with...something, you couldn’t discern what in the dim light. His face lit up like the Vegas strip when he saw you. “(Y/N)! I didn’t want you starving or eating all of your vitamins, so I went down to the vending machine and got you a couple snacks!” Arriving at his desk, he dropped the various bags and packets on his desk, and your eyes widened immensely.

“A couple? Dude, did you buy out the whole machine?”

Slightly breathless from his quick jog back, he waved a dismissive hand. “It was nothing. And hey, look!” He picked up a bag. “Fruit snacks! Just like your vitamins, but without the part where you get really sick.”

You were astonished, to say the least. And minorly speechless too, as evidenced by your mouth that was gaping like a fish. “Spencer...this is so nice. You really didn’t have to.”

“Don’t worry about it; I’m sure you would’ve done the same for me.”

At that, your face nearly split in two, and he mirrored your grin. You thought you might pass out at his kindness, and you knew you’d be thinking about this every day for the next two weeks at least. Your expression then turned mischievous, as you tried to tamp down all of the warmth bubbling in your stomach. “Do you want to help me try to fit all this in my bag?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

——— 

Garcia had been practicing her ukulele peacefully when she got the call.  (Well, ‘peacefully’ might have been a stretch as she had threatened to smash the object on her coffee table when she simply could not get the finger picking pattern she’d practiced for what seemed like hours, but it was supposed to be a relaxing hobby, so yes, it was peaceful.) Huffing a sigh of relief when the caller ID said [(Y/N/N)!!] with the longest stream of heart emojis and not [hotch >:( ], she picked up with her usual air of cheer. “What can I do ya for, my loveliest, most bewitching—”

She was cut off abruptly by the sounds of your horrible, heart-wrenching sobs, and her brows furrowed in concern. “Oh no, my sweet! What’s wrong?” She had to wait a few moments for your tears to calm (somewhat) while you tried to wrangle in your breath, so you could form some sort of sentence.

“Penny!”—gasp—“Oh my God,”—hiccup—“it looks so bad!” With your last word, you tumbled into incoherent bawling once again.

“Dear, what looks so bad?” She held her phone between her ear and her shoulder as she began to gather up her things. Whatever was wrong, it was clear you needed some good, old-fashioned Garcia TLC, and she was ready to give it.

The sniffling subsided minorly, and you choked out, “Remember when we were talking the other day, and I mentioned that my hair had gotten a little too long for my liking?” Oh no, Garcia could see where this was going. “Well, I figured I’d spend our evening off getting my hair cut, and I went to that new hairdresser, and oh Penelope, it looks awful. I don’t think I can ever go out in public again.” With that, your tears resumed.

“Darling, you know I’ve been where you are, and I know it seems bad right now, but everything will be fine. Let me grab my scissors and I’ll be over faster than you can say, ‘Penny, I love you so much, you truly are my fairy godmother.’”

You paused before whispering into the phone, “Penelope, I do love you so much, and you are my fairy godmother. But please, hurry.”

And hurry, she did.

Garcia was knocking on your door a little over five minutes later, which was incredibly suspicious because she lived at least 10 minutes away on a good day, but in the state of your disarray, you were not inclined to care. She sat you down on the toilet in your bathroom, whipping out her hair care set (she had definitely spent a significant amount of time dabbling in cosmetology, and it was desperate times like this when it came in handy). Squeezing your eyes shut through most of it, she snipped here and there, trying to make the best of this...horribly atrocious cut (seriously, that hairdresser should be sued), and when she was finished, it was not as bad as when they started, but it still wasn’t great. The rest of the evening was spent watching cheesy rom-coms and baking in an attempt to get your mind off of your hair.

Everything was mostly fine until the next morning, when you realized you’d have to go into work like this, and as terrifying as that prospect was in a normal work environment, you also worked in a place with an abnormal amount of hot people. (And you happened to be developing feelings for one of those hot people, but your brain was insistent upon ignoring that for the time being.)

Already anticipating your worries, Penelope had sent a text without your knowledge to a BAU group chat that excluded you (she had one of these for every member, it just made surprise birthday party planning so much easier).

[penelope :)] please DO NOT MENTION (Y/N)’S HAIR!!!! she got a bad haircut and she feels really terrible about it and doesn’t want to think about it so do not talk about it!!!

[jennifer!] Oh, no! :( Lips are sealed!

[rossi ;)] rip.

Emerging from the elevator in the nicest work outfit you own (an attempt to distract from the monstrosity), you scurried to Garcia’s lair before anyone could see you. Once inside, you slammed the door shut, and leaning against it, you slid down and covered your face with the files in your hands. “Pennyyyyy,” you moaned. “I don’t think I can do this!”

She swiveled to face you with a look of empathy. “Sugar, I know you can. It—it doesn’t even look that bad!” But Garcia was a horrible liar, and if looks could kill, she would have been dead instantaneously. 

Heaving yourself up off the floor, you came to sit in the seat next to her. “Can’t I just work in here today? And maybe for the rest of time?”

“You know I would love that, but those other lovely people on our team need you! Especially the young doctor, you know he’d be lonely without you.”

As if her mention had summoned him, Reid opened the door to their secret meeting, files in hand, and your eyes nearly jumped out of their sockets. Garcia stared at him very intensely, attempting to telepathically tell him to not mention the hair, and you looked like a deer in the headlights, trying to figure out a way to hide yourself from him and possibly the entire universe. And poor Reid shifted his gaze between the two of you, helplessly confused as to what he had walked into. “Am I interrupting something?”

“Uh, no!” Garcia said in the least convincing manner.

“Okay,” he responded, not convinced in the slightest. “I just came to give you some files from Hotch.” So, he handed Garcia the papers and then turned to leave when you caught his eye. 

And because he was not the greatest with technology, Spencer had not checked his phone that morning…. Meaning he had not seen Garcia’s text. So he looked at you a moment and cocked his head. “Your hair looks really nice today, (Y/N). Did you get it cut?”

This time, it was Garcia’s turn to glare (because read your texts, dammit!), and you fumbled for a response. As you scanned his face, searching for a sign that he was lying, that he was just saying something to make you feel better, you came up empty. He was telling the truth. He genuinely thought your hair looked nice. “Um, uh—yeah. Yeah, I did. Thanks for noticing.”

“You’re welcome.” He offered you a smile, which you returned easily (a fact that surprised you). “See you.” Retreating from the office because the vibes in there were weird, he shut the door, finally leaving you and Garcia alone again. 

You were reeling.

You thought about when you had gotten dressed that morning, and you had entertained each outfit with great scrutiny, trying to come up with something that might draw attention away from your hair. In that half hour you’d spent, you had realized that you didn’t really mind looking bad in front of Morgan or Emily or Hotch or really anyone on the team. Almost anyone. With an increasing amount of discomfort, you had realized you didn't want to look bad in front of Spencer. Of course, he’d never judge you, but you wanted to look good for him. For your best friend.

And he told you your hair looked nice.

You smiled to yourself.

Garcia turned to you with a look of shock on her face. Had that been anyone else, she was sure you would have curled up in a ball beneath her desk and would not have left until every single other person had left the Federal Bureau of Investigation, but you hadn’t, and she smirked.

Oh, she knew where this was going.

——— 

To put it lightly, it had not been the best of mornings. 

It seemed that everything that could’ve gone wrong did, so you burst past the glass doors of the BAU six minutes late with a coffee-covered shirt, mud-stained pants, soggy shoes, and a most miserable attitude. Hotch, while a sympathetic man, was still your boss with rules to follow and when you stumbled into the bullpen, gave a pointed stare between you and the clock, and you nodded sullenly. You understood his silent admonition, but knowing that he was even slightly disappointed in you, made your knees want to buckle. Swallowing around the slug in your throat, you set your bag down beside your chair and noticed a foreign object sitting on your desk. Interest thoroughly piqued, you reached forward to find it was a book with a satin ribbon tied on it.

It truly was a beautiful book with a deep crimson hardcover and the kind of deckled edges that you loved. Running your fingers along the rough-hewn pages, you finally noted the title, and you gasped. Beloved by Toni Morrison. Your favorite. The cursive words curved in black on the cover to match the ribbon, and you carefully traced the curling letters, wondering where this gorgeous book could have come from.

In the desk across from yours, Spencer watched the scene in front of him with a grin. He couldn’t help but feel pleased at the look of awe on your face as you inspected the book with careful fingers and a gentle gaze, and his heart swelled more and more the longer he looked. “Did you know that Margaret Garner, the woman the character Sethe is based on, her trial was used as part of an effort to dismantle the Fugitive Slave Act?” Your eyes flickered up to meet his, and those stupid freaking butterflies erupted in the pit of your stomach as you realized who had gifted you the book. “The presiding judge didn’t accept her lawyer’s argument that the act violated the right to religious freedom, but it was still somewhat of a turning point in the movement to strike down the law.”

“I did not know that, but thank you. For the fact and the book.”

“You’re welcome.” He had to avert his eyes from your strong gaze because he thought he might melt otherwise.

“Please don’t misinterpret this as me being ungrateful because I’m so, so thankful, but why?”

He shrugged, “I was just in the book store, and it made me think of you.” No, he didn’t keep an eye out specifically for this book on his weekly trip to the bookstore by his apartment after you had briefly mentioned your love of Ms. Morrison’s metaphors. And he definitely didn’t ask the owner Alice if she would let him know if she ever got any new copies.

Frankly, you were at a loss for words. Combing back through your conversations with him, you tried to remember when you had talked about the book, but you couldn’t come up with anything other than a couple words tossed briefly here and there. Suppose it wasn’t really the fact that he had heard, but the fact that he had listened. He listened and remembered things about you, little things tucked in the back of his brain, and it was how he thought about you even when you weren’t around. So, you clutched the book to your chest tightly as if it could meld with your heart and let your thoughts rage with the implications for a minute before smothering your mushy grin and tucking the book into your bag.

(Later, you pulled it out on your ride home on the metro. Spencer had already gotten off at his stop a few minutes before, so you took this moment of solitude to revel in the glory of your new gift. Every time you smoothed a hand over the cover, your mind was overwhelmed with what-ifs. What if he felt the same? What if his stomach rumbled with the same butterflies when you looked at him? What if this means he likes you as more than…. And abruptly, you were doused in doubt once again, muzzling those dangerous, rearing hypotheticals. This was a path that would only lead to disappointment.

Those thoughts only got worse when you read his inscription, though:

Dear (Y/N/N),

I hope you find great joy in reacquainting yourself with the graces of Ms. Morrison’s elegant prose in this new copy. I was inspired by your praise and read this classic again, and I can say that I definitely understand your veneration of her story-telling. Hopefully, we can discuss it soon, so I can try to see all of the details that you so admire. You are always much better at appreciating the finer things in life.

She says that, “something that is loved is never lost.”

I hope you know that you will never be lost to me.

Sincerely,

Spencer

(P.S. I wrote this in pencil, so you can erase and have the clean copy you wanted.)

You would never erase it.)

——— 

“Hey, are you alright?”

You sat at your desk with your head in your hands. Your responding “no” came out muffled. 

Spencer frowned and sat on the edge of your desk. “Is there anything I can help with?”

Running your hands over your face, you finally met his gaze. His eyes were soft as they searched your own, and the expression on his face was not of pity or frustration but empathy, and of course, he was just being his sweet self. Your eyes watered in response, and his heart clenched at the sight. You shifted your eyes somewhere else, anywhere else. “Uh, no.”

It was clearly a lie.

Furrowing his brows at your obfuscation, he scanned your face for any indication of what might be the problem. A small sigh. He came up with nothing. “Alright,” he conceded hesitantly. “May I ask what is wrong?”

“No.”

“Okay.”

You stared down at the files neatly ordered on your desk, trying to mentally shoo him away with the sheer force of your willpower alone. But Spencer Reid was a stubborn man, and you knew this, and you also knew he wasn’t leaving until he knew you were alright. So, you both sat in the silence of the bullpen that only accompanied the arrival of midnight. The glow of your lamp bathed the vicinity in a warm yellow, and the tick of the nearby clock rattled around your chest as you attempted fruitlessly to subdue your incessant thoughts. He was close enough that you could hear the soft susurration of his exhales as his eyes flitted about the room to give you some sort of breathing room, and you shut yours for a moment to appreciate this moment of peace before the inevitable catastrophe to follow.

“I’m—uh, not okay.”

Finally turning back to you with a mildly surprised expression (he didn’t expect you to say anything so soon. Or so bluntly.), he offered you one of his signature tight-lipped smiles as encouragement to continue.

“I’m kind of really struggling…” you trailed off, gaze empty, ensnared in your thoughts.

Ever the gentleman with persistence that could last a thousand years, he gently prompted, “With…?”

A strong gulp and eyes squeezed shut. “With you.”

Well, that was not the answer Spencer was expecting. He felt like he’d had the wind knocked out of him, and he was hollow and shaken and in pain. Gaping, he fumbled hopelessly for an answer, trying to find some reason you could be upset with him. He had always thought you two were the best of friends; he’d never doubted that before. How could he have missed this?

Swallowing hard against the lump in his throat, he strained to ask, “Uh—um, what—what did I do?”

Upon witnessing his struggle, you quickly amended your previous statement. “No, no, no, no, no! I’m not mad at you, well, I kind of am, but you don’t need to feel bad, it’s not your fault.”

“I’m not really sure what to make of that.”

You huffed a sigh and covered your face with your hands in a poor attempt to try to hide the blush rapidly coloring your cheeks. “I’m sorry, I just—you’re so nice!”

Now Spencer was really confused. “You’re mad at me...because you think I’m nice?”

“Yes, Spencer! You’re so nice, and it makes me incredibly frustrated. You see this?” You picked up a book from your desk and waved it frantically. A little intimidated by your crazed look, he nodded timidly. “Do you recognize this book?”

“It’s a special edition of Beloved by Toni Morrison.”

“It’s the special edition of my favorite book that you bought for me because you know how much I love this book.”

Spencer looked like a deer in the headlights. “You always said that your book at home was so messy with your annotations and that a fresh copy would have been nice.”

“You didn’t even buy it for my birthday or a special occasion! You just saw it in the store and said that you thought of me and had to buy it. That’s so unbelievably thoughtful! Not to mention the fact that I can barely look at fruit snacks now without tearing up. And—and the other day! When I got my haircut, I hated it, but I came in the next day, and you were the first person to tell me you liked it. You weren’t even lying to make me feel better; I’m a profiler, and I know that you were telling the truth. And it took no effort or thought because Spencer, you are the most kind-hearted and compassionate and generous person I’ve ever met. You are so—so genuinely good. 

“No, you are the best. You are the best person I know,” you stated with finality, holding his stare with an unshakeable firmness. It was the first time you truly looked at him all night, and his heart felt like it was going to expand past his ribcage and burst open like a balloon. Your resolve melted though and your voice dropped to a near whisper. “And you’re not just nice. You’re nice to me. Which just makes it so hard.”

You deflated, withering into your seat.

“Makes what hard?”

“It makes it so much harder for me to not fall in love with you.”

Stunned silence. 

Until it was shattered by a hiccup, and Spencer finally noticed the tears leaking from the corner of your eyes, and he tried, he tried so hard to puzzle through all of this new information and the fact that you just admitted you’re falling in love with him, and for some reason, you’re crying? He couldn’t even get his stupid genius brain to come with a single word before you started stumbling into an apology. “I know that’s not what you want to hear because we’re supposed to be friends, and I know that you’re just a good person, so you’re nice to everyone. Believe me, I know. And I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable, but I couldn’t keep holding on to this by myself, and I knew if anyone would let me down easy, it’d be you.” You chewed on your lip and avoided his stare at all costs. “So, I’m sorry.” You sniffled. 

The quiet that followed weighed heavy on your chest, and you couldn’t seem to breathe. You had expected rejection; you hadn’t expected complete silence. And this was somehow so much more unbearable. In a voice so faint you weren’t even sure if he could hear, you begged, “Please say something.”

A beat.

“(Y/N), I love you.”

A whisper just barely verging on hopeful, “What?”

“(Y/N), I—I love you so much.” His heart felt like it was in his throat, and his voice broke slightly as he stood. “You’re the first person I think about when I get up in the morning, and you’re the last person before I fall asleep. I dread going home at the end of the day because you’re not there. When you’re not with me, even if you’re in the other room, it feels like I’ve forgotten something, and for the longest time, I couldn’t figure out what I was missing, but it was you. You consume my every thought, which is saying something because I think a lot. Actually, it’s kind of funny,” he chuckled somewhat morosely, “I truly cannot comprehend the fact that you don’t know how much I’ve liked you, how long I’ve loved you because it feels like it’s so obvious and so potent that it seeps out of me, whether I want it to or not.

“And I’m nice to you because no one else is more deserving of kindness. I’d be lucky if you let me be the one to remind you of that, everyday. Because you’re the best person I know.” You looked up at him with shining eyes and the meagerest beginnings of a smile, and he just beamed right back. With a creased brow, he ventured, “You’re my favorite person in the world, you know that, right?

Failing to suppress your growing grin, you nodded your head meekly. “Yeah, I know.”

“Good.”

Spencer felt pleased with himself until he remembered that he had forgotten the most important part. “Would you like to get dinner with me sometime? Like a date?”

Standing from your seat, you wrapped your arms around his neck and burrowed your face into his chest, and he immediately reciprocated, clutching you as close as he could. “I would love that.” It came out muffled, but he understood well enough as he pressed his face into your neck. And you stood like that for a few moments, just existing together, and for the first time in a long time, nothing hurt. There was no worry of unrequited yearning or pain of terrible pining; there were just two people who finally knew peace. Knew that the person they loved most in the world loved them back. Neither ever wanted to leave.

However, sometimes necessary duties like breathing take precedence, so you pulled back from him enough to finally claim some air. Your hands slid down his front, resting on his chest, his on your waist, and you just stared at him. The most beautiful face you’d ever seen looking right back at you with the same expression of awe that made you realize just how lucky you were. And slowly, hesitantly, you both leaned in ever so slightly with heads wavering and tension buzzing. Gingerly and sweetly. Neither could commit, but no one could pull away from fast-approaching revelation. 

Finally, a breath away.

“Can I kiss you?”

You nodded.

When your lips met, your chest heaved with your eager, romantic hopes and dreams bubbling up near your lungs, finally coming to fruition. His hands came up to caress your jaw, and you leaned into him. His touch was so gentle, but he also touched you with intention. For once in his life, Spencer Reid felt no hesitation, kissing the girl of his dreams. And you felt held by him. You were bursting at the seams of your existence, swollen with infatuation and tenderness, yet totally and completely encompassed by him. You could shatter into a million tiny, little pieces, and he would be there to collect every shard. How cheesy.

Both of you grinned into the kiss; the sickly sweet itch in your heart was contagious. You finally released him, and wanting to savor the moment, you tucked yourself into the crook of his neck, so his chin could rest on the crown of your head. “I love you a lot, Dr. Reid.”

He hummed in agreement.

It didn’t need saying.

hi, can u rec other sbwy fics?

yes i most certainly can!

below under the cut is a selection of very good sbwy (and sgwy) fics, i.e., wangxian fics where wwx experiences compulsory heterosexuality. by no means is it a comprehensive list of all the excellent fics of this genre, because i'm a super slow reader and simply haven't gotten to them all yet, but these are just the ones i've read and enjoyed so far. of course, mind all tags/content warnings etc you know what's up

~ the Straight Boy Wei Ying universe series by raitala | rated E | 36K words total | i know this ask was prompted by my earlier rec of this series but i'll include it here anyway. a very charming wonderful story, with extremely massively hot sex scenes

Sit down next to me | 7K words

Lan Zhan has been in love with his tragically straight best friend Wei Ying forever. So what if some girl says Wei Ying is a bad kisser? Lan Zhan has to prove to Wei Ying that this is incorrect. Because Lan Zhan is a good friend. He out does himself.

If I hadn't seen such riches | 29K words

Sequel to "Sit down next to me" - if you haven't read this all you need to know is that Wei Ying thinks he is straight. He just really likes his best friend Lan Zhan. Who is incidentally a really great kisser. Who also made him come in his pants one time. Who also has a *really* big dick, which Wei Ying sucked one time, but, like, in an experimental way, not in a gay way. They are just really good friends, right? Lan Zhan is the best. Lan Zhan is crying inside.

~ Keep Up by mimilamp | rated E | 27K words | i actually just read this one today and wwhfoohgkhdghihHHHHHHhghhhhhhgh 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 INSTANT FAVE. MUST READ.

“She was going to kiss me,” Wei Ying says, muffled, into his hands.

Lan Zhan makes sure he keeps his breaths even. “Hm,” he says. Wei Ying looks up at him, wild: a little tipsy, perhaps. Confused, in a panic. His mouth is red like he’s been kissed—he hasn’t. He’s a lip biter, has a habit of picking at his dry lips, the winter sores at the corner of his mouth. It drives Lan Zhan to madness. He dreams of Wei Ying’s puffy mouth, often, sometimes with the real Wei Ying in a sleeping bag on the floor next to his bed. On mornings like those he wakes up in a cloud of embarrassment—hobbling to the bathroom at dawn, running a loud shower to hide the sounds. Wei Ying sleeps on.

“How do I—” Wei Ying starts, stops. He then lets out a single laugh, another. He says: “Oh my god. How do I kiss? Lan Zhan, how do I kiss?”

*

Or: Wei Ying has a girlfriend now. Wei Ying doesn't want his best friend to lag behind.

~ A Brilliant Idea by FrameofMind | rated E | 25K words | good for you wei ying

The one where Wei Ying (straight) and Lan Zhan (gay) make a shared tinder account to save money, because Wei Ying has brilliant ideas.

(Wei Ying has terrible ideas.)

~ worth it for the feeling by occultings | rated E | 8K words | they're both girls in this one! "straight" girl wei ying 🥰

“I’ve never gotten off with another person,” Wei Ying says that night, apropos of nothing.

~ ready to run by detectorist | rated E | 21K words | really really enjoyed the plot and atmosphere and everything in this story

“You should make a Tinder account for campaigning,” Nie Huaisang says.

Wei Ying chokes out, “What?”

“Sounds like an absolutely terrible idea,” Jiang Cheng says flatly.

“No, it’s a great idea!” Nie Huaisang insists. “You just swipe right on everyone and then send them a message about how they should vote for you. You’re hot, Wei Ying! People will definitely match with you and then you can swoop in and hit them with the politics!”

“I don’t even have Tinder,” Wei Ying protests. He’d downloaded the app in first year but had quickly deleted it after a girl responded to his message of wanna get a drink with yeah sure, what time?

“That can be easily fixed,” Nie Huaisang says.

—

Wei Ying downloads Tinder to help him campaign for his student union election. He gets a little more than he bargained for.

~ drop the game by martyrsdaughter | rated E | 28K words | cheerleader wwx + jock lwj + fake dating + practice kissing + insane sexual tension = me, flattened like a cartoon character after getting run over by a truck

Wei Ying grabs a pen from Lan Zhan’s desk, curling his legs into a lotus pose under the arms of the chair so he can easily spread the journal out across his lap. Even upside down, Lan Zhan can read his large, messy characters scrawled across the top: Lan Zhan + Wei Ying’s Rules for Dating.

Perhaps this was a bad idea.

~ big hands (i know you're the one) by martyrsdaughter | rated E | 8K words | WHOOF 🥵

“Not a big talker, hm?” Wei Ying tilts his head to one side. “That’s okay, I’ve been told I’m a good enough conversationalist for three. My tongue is multi-talented and—”

He has just enough time to feel her palm on the back of his neck and think, oh, her hands are so big, before his words are being stolen into her mouth.

~ Boy Trouble, We've Got Double by saltyfeathers | rated E | 60K words | LAN ZHAN???? BETHROTHED???? NOT TO WEI YING??????? it's less likely than you think! canonverse casefic, featuring tons of pining and wwx taking outrageous liberties with lwj's person, as is his right

Lan Zhan stands there in his immaculate, cloud-patterned Lan robes, watching him calmly, one fist tucked up against his back. “I am betrothed.”

Wei Wuxian blinks. “Are you…” He tries to laugh. Again, it sounds inhuman. “Is this about last night? Are you mad at me? I only remember some of it, Lan Zhan. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I’m sure whatever I did I was just—” He gestures uselessly. He remembers being warm in Lan Zhan’s lap. He remembers fitting snugly in Lan Zhan’s lap. Wrapping his arms around Lan Zhan’s neck. Nosing at his jaw. “…playing around.”

“This has nothing to do with you, Wei Wuxian.”

~ cherry ass wei ying (Chapter 3 of threadfic) by saltyfeathers | rated E

wei ying is so straight he sucks lan zhan's fingers about it.

~ all(e)y (Chapter 11 of threadfic) by saltyfeathers | rated E

prompt fill on twitter for straight boy wei ying + fake dating that ended up being too long for twitter so now it lives here in stupid silly shame. sorry the fake dating is a complete flyover state in this. to make up for it, i wrote out an entire blowjob for some reason.

~ lan zhan has fallen in fuck-love with the straight toad boy (Chapter 14 of threadfic) by saltyfeathers | rated M | there is no chapter summary provided by the author. the title says it all, really

~ wei wuxian loves mysteries! (Chapter 15 of threadfic) by saltyfeathers | rated G | a canonverse character exploration of wwx, set pre-CR (before wangxian first meet). soooo good

~ the mall that has it all by saltyfeathers | rated E | 8K words | 😳 wrow

She introduced herself in the food court, breathless after sprinting across it in Lan Zhan’s direction and vaulting over a table only to crash into the seat across from her, ask, “Can I have a sip?”, spring forward with both elbows on the table to wrap her burgundy lips around Lan Zhan’s smoothie straw, wrinkle her nose, and say, “What is that, kale? Not really my thing, as like, a mall goth. Oh!” A pleased, chaotic exhale. “My name’s Wei Ying.”

Lan Zhan said, after taking a moment to fully process the last forty-five seconds, “What?”

or;

mall goth au

~ I Wish You Would by brooklinegirl | rated E | 52K words | lan zhan fucks guys, wei ying pines, and lan zhan also pines

Lan Zhan takes a breath. His hands are in fists on his thighs. He stares down at them hopelessly, then carefully unclenches them, one finger at a time, before taking another breath and reaching for his lukewarm tea. He'll go out, tomorrow. Maybe in the late afternoon. Something quick. Something easy. He'll text his brother first, the short note of when he should be home, so he'll know to track him. He'll be fine, just like he said.

~ all that and more by Euphorion | rated E | 20K words | hot hot hot! and a classic

Wei Wuxian locks his phone and puts it down, blinks at his ceiling, and picks it up again. The pictures are still there.

His first thought is that Lan Zhan meant them for someone else. That he just woke up at—he checks the timestamp—6:30 am on a Sunday and decided to go absolute full nuclear seduction option on some poor boy he met on Grindr, who would now be missing out on the best thing to ever happen to him because Wei Wuxian had a bad habit of distracting—of—oh.

Pieces of last night start to resurface and paste themselves together in his head. He winces.

~ dreaming and getting a glimmer by verseau | rated E | 27K words | THE comphet gloryhole fic

Wei Ying discovers himself.

~ wanna feel a different kinda tension by verseau | rated E | 10K words | THE comphet watching-porn-together-and-also-wwx-jerks-lwj-off-with-his-own-freshly-used-fleshlight fic

Four times Lan Zhan walks in on his roommate masturbating.

that's all for now! happy october!

GF - Growing Old(er)

Alternate Title: Growing Older

Summary: Everyone has a sinking realization that life is temporary and that we’re all gonna die, and unfortunately sweet Mabel has her’s.

~~~~~~~~~~

“Come on, Stanley, be serious!”

“I am serious! Dipper can have my boxing gloves and Mabel can have my old collection of photos.”

“This is an important document that goes above and beyond a few keepsakes!” Ford tried to explain this, yet again, to his brother. “We need to discuss more important arrangements…”

“Look, Wise Guy, the Shack already belongs to Soos…”

“But what about the car? What about the Stan O’ War?”

“The boat’s gonna be burned down with us in it.” Stan held up his hands in front of him and moved them apart as he elaborated. “Picture this: two old sailors lying in their boat, their friends and family shooting flaming arrows at it across the sea as some farewell-bar song plays. We’d go down like kings!”

“Yeah, no.” Ford said firmly. “We’re not doing that.”

Mabel skipped into the living room and found her grunkles at the card table. They had a bunch of stupid-looking documents covering the table, but Ford seemed like the only one really interested in it, a pen in his hand and he was leaning forward to work while Stan was sipping a can of soda and sat back in the chair. “Whatcha doin’?” She asked.

“Constructing our will and testimony.”

“WHAT?!” Mabel shrieked and covered her mouth with her hands. Her uncles stared at their niece as her eyes filled with tears and she struggled to ask with a choked whisper, “Are… are you guys…”

“Oh no, pumpkin.” Stan scooped her up into his lap and hugged her. Mabel clung onto his undershirt tightly and bit her lip as she tried not to cry. “Sixer and I are fine, I promise. He just thought it’d be a bright idea to get this outta the way for when we do kick the bucket.”

Ford leaned forward and rubbed her back. “I’m sorry, my dear, I never meant to scare you like this. I swear, we’re both perfectly healthy and going to be around for awhile.”

Mabel wiped her tears away with the sleeve of her sweater and sniffed. “O-Okay. So… why are you making a will?”

“Well, unfortunately someone bypassed the downsides of faking your death and stealing another man’s name.” Ford said lightly as he gave Stan a crooked smile. His twin just stuck his tongue out at him. “So there are some things we need to discuss to simplify complicated actions and it would be a good idea to make certain arrangements.”

“Like what?”

“Well, since in a way we both share the name ‘Stanford Pines’, it would be wise to make such legal documents together. This will ensure that the right people receive the right gifts and inheritance, and that our bodies are properly taken care of in an orderly manner that best helps the living grieve and keeps the government off our backs.”

Mabel still didn’t like the sound of all of this. “But why do you guys need to talk about it? You said you’re fine.”

“We are, sweetie,” Stan said warmly and ruffled her hair. “But we’re not gonna be around forever. Eventually these old farts are gonna be sleeping with the fishes, and when that happens we just wanna make sure everything’s taken care of. At least that’s what Sixer wants. I don’t care what happens as long as my tombstone is bigger than his.”

“That is not going to happen.” Ford said firmly with a smile.

“Too bad, I called it.”

“Since when?!”

“Since the election last summer. The niblings can back me up, right Mabel?”

The brunette grinned and shrugged. “Sorry, but since you two aren’t fighting anymore it doesn’t count. Clean slate!”

“What?!” Stan gasped with a smile. “Betrayed by my own pumpkin! Fine! Someone’s not getting my old stop-motion movies!”

“Good!” Mabel laughed with her uncles for a little bit while Ford wrote some stuff down, still trying to complete the task. The teenage girl looked up at her hero and she remembered the reason why she came in here in the first place. “Hey, do you guys wanna go make some cupcakes with me? I’ve got extra sprinkles!”

“Sure,” Stan let Mabel slide off his lap and he stood, but his brother stopped him.

“Not so fast, Stan, we have to finish this at some point. Why don’t we make cupcakes after dinner?”

Mabel’s concerns were coming back. She looked at Ford carefully to try to pick up a lie. “I thought you said you two were okay.”

“We are, Mabel, I promise.” Ford even paused his work and crossed his heart for his niece, making her smile. “But no one lives forever. One day we won’t be here. It’s like Stanley said; we just want to make sure everything will be okay.”

“It’s the way it works.” Stan said with a shrug and plopped down in his chair. “We’re born, we live a little, and then we die. S’long as you don’t just survive but live too, it ain’t so bad.”

Mabel stared at her uncles. “Aren’t you scared?” Her voice was meek and lacked her usual confidence.

“Of death? Not really.” Ford admitted. “Death is nothing but the next great adventure. An unseen destiny awaiting all mortals at the end of their lifespans.”

“And hey, that doesn’t mean I’m ready to go just yet.” Stan added in. “I wanna see my kids graduate and get married and have their own little gremlins to terrorize them.”

“Oh, absolutely!” Ford quickly agreed with. “I didn’t mean we’re done with life, but the more familiar we become with death, the less frightening it is.”

“Besides, we’ve both faced the hooded dude so many times, leaving with him will be like seeing an old friend.” Stan barked a quick laugh and added, “Maybe I’ll grab drinks with him!”

Mabel giggled, but then slowly wandered onto a dark train of thought. The idea of death was not new to her; she and her brother had nearly died at the hands of an evil triangle (she still sometimes had nightmares about it). But even though she had come to terms with growing up, she hadn’t put two and two together and realized that growing up also means growing older and then dying. It was new territory Mabel had not yet ventured into, and suddenly she didn’t feel like making cupcakes anymore.

~~~~~~~~~~

The next day the subject was still on Mabel’s mind. One day, her favorite people in the whole world were going to die. Stan was going to die, Ford was going to die, Dipper was going to die. Then she would be all alone until she died. But then what? The end? Lights out? There were such things as ghosts, so maybe they could come back and haunt Gravity Falls as a family, but the ghosts didn’t seem quite like themselves on Earth; they were vengeful and angry and hurt. Mabel’s grunkles had enough of that in life, so maybe it was for the best that they don’t come back.

Mabel was so distracted that she tripped on a rock while walking in the woods and scraped her knee. She held it and winced with tears in her eyes, a little bit of blood trickling down from her small wound. “Ow, ow, ow! What the…”

She looked at the rock that had caused it and saw something odd by it. A necklace with a silver chain and a red ruby in a circle sparkled by the rock. Mabel picked it up and looked at it. Scratches of some kind were around the ruby and it sparkled and looked pretty. The ruby was a darker red than most normal rubies, but there was no denying the sparkling gem. “Wow, cool! I bet Grunkle Ford would love to look at this.” For safekeeping, Mabel put it around her neck and tucked it under her sweater as she stood.

She continued on her way to town and she smiled at the arcade. As she approached, she was oblivious to her changing body. She grew a few inches taller, now maybe slightly shorter than Wendy, and her hair was shorter, now only to her shoulders. A few zits littered her maturing skin and her curves were growing in. Mabel was so distracted by her thoughts and the need to think of something else that she didn’t even notice. Her clothes magically changed with her so she didn’t feel tight or uncomfortable.

Mabel entered the arcade and happily played that new battle video game she had her eye on. Shooting aliens made her feel a little bit better, but it also made her hungry. She left the arcade a little while later and talked to herself as she wandered around Gravity Falls for something to eat. “I mean, I get it. There’s nothing wrong with change. I know there’s nothing I can do about it, but I guess I never really thought about everything changing like that.”

As Mabel walked, her hair grew back to it’s normal length and her zits went away. Her vision was a little blurry, but Mabel just shrugged it off and dismissed it as a sign that she was tired. She did feel emotionally drained as she purchased a jelly-filled doughnut and munch on it, her mind now in a rut. She had no idea what to do or where to go to feel better, so maybe a walk in the woods would help.

Mabel strolled through the forest and continued to think about life and death. “Poor guys… what will happen to them if they’re not together? What if Grunkle Stan dies first? Grunkle Ford will be all alone, but what if Grunkle Ford dies first? Then Grunkle Stan will be all alone again. None of that’s fair.” Mabel then gasped in horror and her eyes became more blurry due to tears. “What if Dipper dies first and I end up all alone? Or what if I die first and then he’ll be all alone? Ugh, why can’t every twin die of duel heart attack?!”

Mabel was very tired. Her back ached and her legs ached and her knees ached and she had a headache… everything hurt. She realized she was at the lake and she decided to sit by the shoreline and rest. She held her knees by her chest and peered down at the water. “I guess I just gotta… WHAT?!” Mabel yelled in horror and jumped away from her reflection, but then forced herself to make sure she wasn’t crazy.

An old version of Mabel stared back at the thirteen-year-old. Her gray hair was the same shade as Grunkle Stan’s except for a stripe of darker gray down her long hair, kinda like Grunkle Ford. She had wrinkles from all of her past smiles and her hands were ached with arthritis. In fact, everything hurt, but if Mabel had to guess, her reflection was only in her fifties.

“Wow… I look so cool!” Mabel cheered as she peered down at the lake. “Look at me! I look like a silver fox! This is great! I can buy all the drinks and magazines I want! On weekdays I get half-priced dinners! I get free money from the government! And now I don’t have to go to high-school!” She laughed at her own joke, but then her back popped painfully and she yelped. “Ouch! Is this how the guys feel all the time?” Mabel asked as she looked at her curly gray hair and her wrinkling skin. A scary realization started to sink in. “Oh no. This… This is bad… What if I… Ford!” She gasped and quickly stood up. “Grunkle Ford will know what to do! He can fix me!”

Against better judgment, Mabel ran as fast as she could for home. Her hair became grayer and curlier as it began to lose it’s life. Mabel suddenly felt an overwhelming pain in her chest, making it hard to breathe, and she tripped over her own feet and fell, unable to get back up. The old lady moaned on the grass, helpless. She looked up and with her horrible vision she could have sworn she could see a brown triangle up ahead, indicating the Mystery Shack.

“Help… help…” She breathed weakly, but no one was coming. She sighed with exhaustion and laid back down on her front to try to regain some rest so she could move forward.

Dipper, meanwhile, had been looking for his sister. He guessed she was hanging out with Candy and Grenda, but in case she was somewhere in the house he wanted to ask her if she had borrowed his BABBA CD. “Mabel? Mabel?” He called on the porch. He shrugged and was about to head inside, forced to be patient, but then he heard and saw Waddles scamblering out of the woods alone; immediately Dipper suspected something was off; Mabel never lets her beloved pig explore alone, but maybe he had been adventurous and sneaky and now regretted it.

“Waddles?” Dipper scratched the top of his head to calm him down. “What’s up, buddy? You okay?”

Waddles suddenly bit his vest, tugged, and then let go and ran back to the edge of the woods. He oinked and squealed, begging Dipper to follow him. Taking his chances, Dipper followed, wondering if something - or someone - was out there. Only a few steps into the woods and Dipper saw a woman on the ground face-first. He saw the long gray hair and gasped with shock when he realized it was an old lady. “Whoa, hey, are you okay, miss?” He asked and was on his knees by her side, unsure how to help.

“Dipper…” The old lady sighed and looked up at the boy.

“Mabel?!” Dipper gasped; she may be old, but he could recognise her own twin. “What the heck happened?! Did you time travel? Are you from the future?!”

“N-No…” Mabel sighed. “Ford… Grunkle Ford… get…”

“Come on, I’ll take you to him.” Dipper said firmly to mask his fear. He draped one of his sister’s frail arms over his neck and helped her up to her feet. Slowly but surely they were heading back towards home.

Meanwhile, Ford was at the kitchen table, pleasantly munching on his lunch. Stan, on the other hand, shivered, put down his fork, and gulped down some soda.

“What, you don’t like my tuna salad?” The scientist asked.

“No. Who puts raisins in tuna salad?”

“The French.”

“Well, it’s not right.” Stan grumbled as he started on a new task: picking the raisins out of his meal.

Ford rolled his eyes and got up to refill his glass with water. The door opened and they heard Dipper’s voice before they saw him. “Grunkle Ford!”

He smiled kindly and turned, “What is it, m-” He dropped his glass, letting it shatter by his boots.

Mabel hung loosely by his shoulder, her hair gray and her skin in wrinkles. The elder twins rushed to her and Stan got to her first, holding her gently by the chin to look at her face. “Mabel, sweetie! Can you hear me? What happened?!”

“I don’t know, I just found her like this!” Dipper answered.

“Set her in the armchair.” Ford instructed. “We can fix this…”

“What if we can’t?!” Stan dared to ask. “I’m not just saying this cuz of her age, but she doesn’t look good.”

“No, you’re right.” Ford elaborated. “She’s not that much older than us, but the sudden change must have taken a toll on her body; we’ve had time to adjust and keep our bodies in good shape… or at least prevent aches, but she hasn’t had that kind of time. But she’ll be fine, we can reverse this, I’m sure of it.”

Dipper had Mabel sit on the armchair, her eyes closed, and now sitting back the amount of effort she had to put into breathing was more apparent. She groaned slightly and the boys were shocked to find her aging again more rapidly in front of them. Her wrinkles were deeper and her hair slowly turned white.

“Dipper, get the first aid kit, now!” Ford commanded and the teenager was off like a rocket.

Stan sat on the dino-skull and held her thin hand. “Just hang on, pumpkin, we’ve got this.” He soothed, his voice trembling slightly due to his tightening throat.

Mabel moaned slightly and tried to open her eyes. “Gr-Grunkle Stan…”

“Yeah, it’s me, sweetheart.” Stan smiled and squeezed her hand. “You’ll be fine, you’re a Pines for crying out loud, so just hang in there, okay?”

Mabel cracked a small smile and nodded.

Dipper was back. “Here!”

“Good,” Ford opened it and took her opposite hand, pulling out a stethoscope and listening to her heartbeat through her wrist. “Let’s see…”

Mabel was aging again; her hair was thinning and some of it was falling out of her scalp. Her hand in Stan’s grasp was now nothing more than skin on bones, her veins sensitive. She moaned and had to put more effort into her breathing; now she looked almost a hundred.

“No, no, no!” Stan called. “Mabel?”

“Hold on, sweetie, it’ll be okay.” Ford gently coached Mabel as he listened to her heartbeat, praying it would never stop.

“What the…” Dipper began to notice faint glowing behind Mabel’s sweater. He pulled down to see her neck and upper-chest and he gasped at a red ruby necklace with a silver chain. The gem was glowing and vibrating, almost looking like it was hot, and when Dipper went to touch it, it almost burned his skin and it was stuck to Mabel’s skin like it had been super-glued onto her.

“That’s not any gem!” Ford gasped. “That’s a Youth-Sucker! It drains the wearer’s youth until the host dies and then the necklace will feed off of the body.”

“What do we do, what do we do?!” Stan asked.

“We have to remove it, carefully.” Ford said and turned to Dipper. “Get the tool kit.” And the teenager was gone, again.

Too soon Mabel was aging again. More hair was falling out, now half of it was gone and the rest remaining was thin. Mabel tried to swallow a moan but it was very apparent on her face that she was in a lot of pain. The pain would definitely explain the sou-sucking leech. Ford eyed the anomaly on his niece’s chest as it began to pur happily over the approaching meal.

“Dipper, hurry!” Ford barked harshly.

Mabel struggled to open her eyes, but she was tired of looking at the darkness. “I… I love you…” Her voice was so quiet and so weak it was a miracle it could be heard.

Stan squeezed her hand as tightly as he could risk without hurting her. “We love you too, pumpkin, but don’t gimme any of that mushy stuff like it’s goodbye, okay?” He blinked to try to ease the stinging in his eyes.

“M’scared…”

“Here!” Dipper was back and practically threw the tool box at Ford so he could get to work.

The scientist pulled out one of his electronic gloves and a pair of tweezers and instructed,” Dipper, hold down the sweater’s neck so I can work.” Dipper helped the gem being showcased and it continued to vibrate and burn and pur. Mabel would probably have a very nasty burn on her chest for a while, but that didn’t matter nearly as much as saving her life.

“Easy, easy,” Ford said mostly to himself as he carefully pinched the gem by the hook where the string was, reading to pull when the anomaly was at its weakest. He would have to do it quickly to not worsen Mabel’s burn with his glove, and so in classic Stanford Pines action, with one swift movement he shocked the gem and pulled it off of Mabel’s chest the second it screeched with pain and anger.

The moment the Youth-Sucker was off Mabel her youth returned her to and soon she was a tired thirteen-year-old, rosy cheeked and with a full head of beautiful brown hair. She blinked her eyes open and rubbed them with her fists, like waking from a dream, and was surprised to find still electrocuting the Youth-Sucker in his fist as punishment for trying to kill his Mabel. “Whoa.”

“Mabel!” Stan cried out and swallowed her into his lap for a tight hug. “Don’t scare me like that, pumpkin, I thought I was gonna lose you!”

“I’m sorry, I just thought it looked cool.” Mabel tried to explain but her face was buried in his chest and she happily hugged him back.

“Well, all’s well that ends well.” Ford breathed, his anxiety finally going down as he stood normally and pocketed the Youth-Sucker to dissect for science. “I’m sure there’s a valuable lesson to take from all of this.”

“Meh, too tired to figure that out.” Mabel moaned as she nuzzled her face against her grunkle.

“Alright, then bed sweetie.” And Dipper and Ford knew better than to point out that he was taking her to his bedroom instead of the attic; Stan needed a nap, too, and there was no way he was going to let his little girl out of his arms for a while after that traumatizing scare.

you’re a sunflower (i think your love would be too much)

muse: cha eunwoo x reader (3rd person perspective)

genre: florist! au, fluff

word count: 2628

warnings: none

notes: title from sunflower by post malone and swae lee

-

Love is colored red like a rose, they say. It’s sweet and pretty and delicate, and when you find it, it should overwhelm you to the point where you’re no longer able to breathe.

Cliché? Very. Poetic? Enough. Romantic? Sure, if Eunwoo didn’t dislike roses so much.

He didn’t hate them, per se. In fact, he found roses to be quite lovely flowers, especially the yellow and pink stems he likes to use in soft spring baskets, or the little sprays of purple he prefers for smaller bouquets.

But why roses? Why not tulips? Asters? Gardenias? Jasmine?

Why must the truest love be in the form of a red rose?

They’re not even that pretty, to begin with.

It really made Valentine’s Day (or any other popular romantic occasion) a living hell. Each year, he always found himself drowning in a mountain of brilliant red bouquets, skin scratched and pricked from the merciless thorns, head spinning from the too-strong scent that would leave him reeling for the next week. Not quite unlike his current situation, actually— finishing an absurd order for a summer wedding that decided red roses were to be the main flower of the night. Now, Eunwoo probably shouldn’t be judging the kind of flowers people picked for weddings, because that’s literally none of his business and they should be able to do whatever they wanted for their special day. But sometimes, he just wished they had a little more… well, taste. Plus, roses were barely still in season, and finding the right farm to order from had already given him a big enough headache to deal with.

Halfway into the twenty-something centerpieces he was becoming increasingly agitated with, the sort-of-peace and quiet Eunwoo had fallen in tune with is interrupted by the ever so familiar chime of the antique bell hanging over the shop door. Oh right, he’s still open today, regardless of the ridiculous amount of roses he has to arrange together. To make matters worse, Sanha and Minhyuk were out on a delivery and (like always) taking their sweet time, hence leaving him to man the shop alone. He should probably stop being cheap and hire some extra hands to help around instead of drowning himself in work all the time.

Pushing away from the overflowing worktable, Eunwoo stands and stretches out his arms, glancing at the old clock ticking on the backroom’s wall as he heaves a yawn— 9:12 a.m. Not bad considering how he had started at seven and already finished prepping all the corsages and boutonnieres, though that meant there were only a few hours left until everything was to be packed and shipped out to the wedding venue in time.

Ah, who cares for deadlines. He really, really needed a break or else he’ll start having nightmares about roses for the rest of his life.

Hurrying out to the front counter, Eunwoo wipes his hands on his apron and runs them through his messy hair in an attempt to appear slightly more presentable. Three out of ten chances it actually worked (thanks to the stubborn cowlick that always stuck up in the back), though it was worth a try. And even if he didn’t look thoroughly kempt, at least he had his smile to distract from the mess he currently was.

“Welcome to Once and Flor-al! How can I help you today?” Fixing a grin onto his face, he peers around in search of his customer-slash-savior. His eyes settle on a girl inspecting the tub of marigolds by he had set out by the windows this morning. However, before he can approach her and make another greeting, she straightens up and turns around, plucking an earbud out of her ear as she focuses her gaze on Eunwoo. Well, not exactly Eunwoo, but he doesn’t realize that until she opens her mouth to reply.

“Damn, that’s an awful lot of roses back there. It’s not even Valentine’s Day?”

Eunwoo winces, wishing the ground would just swallow him up out of pure embarrassment. Of all first impressions he could’ve given her, of course it just had to be related to the roses he didn’t even like. He’s never going to take rose orders at this size ever again.

“Uhh… yeah. Don’t worry about that,” he mumbles, taking a step over to block the open doorway of the backroom. “It’s a disaster back there.”

Despite Eunwoo’s hopes of ending the conversation topic there, the girl seemed to have other ideas in mind. “It looks like the Queen of Hearts is preparing world domination or something. Or it’s her wedding. Is someone having a wedding?”

“Um, sure. Wedding.” Eunwoo bites his lip, feeling his confusion grow ever so slightly. “Anyways, is there anything I can help you with? Are you here to buy flowers, or…?”

“Oh! My roommate wants flowers for a date.”

“Your roommate?” Eunwoo echoes, tilting his head to the side curiously. “Not for yourself?”

She nods, “Yeah, he asked me to go get some since he’s busy cooking for the date and refuses to leave the kitchen to me because he doesn’t trust me not to ruin anything. Which, I personally disagree with, since I cook for us more than he does, but it’s his date so whatever. He also doesn’t have an aesthetic bone in his body, so I guess I’ll just take one for the team and get the flowers myself.”

Although taken aback by her long spiel of an answer, Eunwoo finds himself cracking a small smile at her talkative nature. “Sounds like a nice roommate. You’re not jealous of the date?”

The girl immediately makes a face of disgust. “Hell no, Myungjun is the most obnoxious person I’ve ever met. I mean he’s a great friend, but there is no way I’d ever want to date him. He’s gay, anyways.”

“Ah. I hope his date goes well then!” Eunwoo’s not sure why he feels so relieved all of a sudden, or why his heart is beating so quickly in the first place. Maybe it had something to do with how cute the girl… no, he had to be professional here, what the hell was he even doing? “So, any specific flowers in mind? Did, uh, Myungjun request anything in particular?”

His queries are met with a shake of her head. “No, he just told me to get ‘the nicest bouquet they sell’ and make it quick. Though I’ll make a confession, I’m probably just clueless as he is to picking pretty and meaningful flowers.”

“Well, I mean I can help. That is my job, after all,” Eunwoo offers, hoping he didn’t sound too desperate to help. Which is a really stupid thing to worry about, he thinks a moment later, because he’s the freaking florist and owner of the damn store. Was he really going to be a mess over someone had he just met? Yes, yes he was.

“Oh wait, yeah, I’m dumb.” Letting out a laugh, she breaks into a grin before reaching forward to brush the bright daffodils sitting on the counter. “By the way, this is sort of a personal request as the person who’s delivering the thing, but can you please not put roses in it? At least not red ones? It would be greatly appreciated.”

Eunwoo raises his brow at the sudden request. “No roses? Don’t people love them, though? For romantic stuff, especially.”

“Yeah, but the red ones are just so ugly. In a huge bouquet together, at least. I also can’t really stand the smell of roses. No offense,” she quickly adds, eyes darting back to the huge red mountain in the backroom.

“None taken,” Eunwoo scoffs lightly, ducking his head to hide his growing grin. “Believe me, I’m not a huge fan either.”

“Really? Thank goodness I’m not the only one then.” Her giggles aren’t at all dainty nor delicate, but they’re still a sweet sound to Eunwoo’s ears. “So, uhm, flowers?”

“Oh yes, flowers!” Slipping out from behind the counter, Eunwoo beckons for the girl to follow him.

“Let’s see… asters are in season right now, and I have a ton of colors here today. The purple ones are my favorites, and they go really nicely with the white delphiniums. And yellow gladioli! If you don’t mind, I would add some pink alstroemerias in here too…” One by one, he moves around the room plucking each named flower from their tubs, humming softly as he gathers the blooms and makes his way back to the wooden counter. “And now, we put it all together.”

The girl is surprisingly quiet as Eunwoo begins to work, wordlessly watching him clip the stems and arrange them in a neat bouquet. Halfway in he decides to steal a glance at her face, eyes flitting up to find an expression filled with delighted interest so bright it makes his heart stumble. Cheeks heating up, he quickly refocuses and adds the last bunch of the fillers, grabbing the twine and paper to secure and wrap the bouquet together before he actually does something stupid. As soon as he finishes it off with a pretty pink ribbon, Eunwoo releases the breath he didn’t realize he had been holding, managing another I-know-what-I’m-doing smile as he lifts the creation for her to admire.

“Wow, you’re really good at your job.” Her response comes a few delayed moments later, and if he’s not mistaken, she’s a little breathless saying it. “Like, really good at your job.”

“Haha yeah, I know.” Eunwoo mentally smacks himself in the head at his reply. “I mean, thanks! Thank you, that is my job. To make pretty bouquets.”

She laughs again, radiant and sparkling, and he feels like blushing again. “It’s a very pretty bouquet. How much for your services?”

Eunwoo scrambles over to the register, fumbling with the keys and cash as he counts out the right amount of change for her large bills. Just as he’s printing out the receipt, a very small but loud thought crosses his mind— what if he wrote his number down on the back? Not the business number, but his personal…

“Uhh, sorry for being annoying, but could you tell me what each of these flowers mean? They’re all very lovely and I’m kinda curious,” the girl (how has he still not asked for her name?) asks shyly as she fiddles with her wallet. A little odd considering how lively she seemed earlier, but Eunwoo finds it endearing.

“Of course, the language of flowers is my favorite to explain. And trust me, those wedding roses are a hundred times more annoying than you could ever be.” Adjusting his hold on the bouquet, he begins pointing out the flowers while rattling off the meanings of each. “There are asters, which are a symbol of love and trust. They’ve been around for a while, since the Greeks, who named them after a goddess and for their star-shaped heads. Up top here are yellow gladioli— they mean cheerfulness and compassion— and white delphiniums— which symbolize joy and a big heart. And alstroemeria here,” Eunwoo takes a breath before continuing, “Means friendship and devotion. Probably not a super symbolic flower for a date, but it’s still a beautiful meaning in my mind.”

“Everything in this shop is beautiful,” she blurts, and Eunwoo looks up to see her staring not at the flowers, but straight at him. Their eyes meet, and he’s pretty sure the way her face flushes red as a peony is not a hallucination in the slightest.

Cheesy? Most definitely. Did he care? Most definitely not.

Except just as he’s about to say something just as cheesy back, the moment is broken by the sound of a squawking bird.

“God I’m sorry, that’s my phone. Excuse me for a sec,” she yelps, pulling out the disruptive device and flashing him an apologetic smile before checking the notification. “Ah crap, my roommate is asking where I am.” Pouting, she turns back to him reluctantly. “I think that’s my cue to leave.”

“It’s alright,” Eunwoo assures her, gingerly handing over the bouquet and trying his best to ignore the way their fingers brush underneath. “I probably should get back to those roses anyways. Here’s the receipt—”

Oh wait, he didn’t get a chance to write his number down. Once again, he mentally smacks himself, but it’s already too late to take it back now. Aaaaa…

Thankfully, the girl doesn’t seem to notice his awkward hesitation, instead brightening up a little when she straightens up to bid him farewell. “Thank you so much, you’ve been super helpful and friendly! I don’t think I’ve ever met a shopkeeper as nice as you.” Balancing the bouquet in one arm, she sticks out her other hand as if for him to shake it. “See you again, uh…?”

“Eunwoo.” Reaching out, he takes her hand and gives her a gentle shake. “Cha Eunwoo.”

Beaming, she replies eagerly with her own name. “Your flower shop is adorable, Mr. Cha Eunwoo. I hope you don’t mind me visiting again in the near future.”

One last sunburst of a laugh and her fingers are slipping out of his own, and Eunwoo is once again left wondering how someone could be so dazzling as to rival the sun.

“Good bye—”

The sun, huh?

“Wait! You forgot something—”

Confused, the girl lowers her hand on the door and turns around to see Eunwoo dash out from behind the counter, making a beeline for the largest tub of flowers he had set out by the windows just when the sun’s first rays had peaked out from over the horizon. He bends over and picks out not the biggest, but the fullest bloom of the bunch, gingerly shaking the water off the stem before rushing over to her side.

“A sunflower,” he pants, holding it out awkwardly like a baton. “Meaning happy thoughts and adoration. And my favorite summer flower. For you. No payment needed.”

Her eyes widen as she takes the single stem from his hand, lips stretching unabashedly when she peers at him once more, “Thank you, it’s gorgeous. I’ll be sure to keep it by my window for as long as possible.” Rising to her toes, she leans in and plants a tiny peck on his cheek. “Though I’ll have to admit, you’re still the prettiest flower here, Eunwoo.”

The doorbell clings almost teasingly as she slips out the shop, leaving Eunwoo behind to sigh and touch his cheek and fall back against the wall with probably the dumbest grin on his face.

Oh, what a terrible mess he was.

“Hey, Eunwoo! We’re back! Do you need any help? Holy shit, that’s still a lot of roses... what are you doing out there? Why do you look so happy? What the hell happened while we were gone?”

Minhyuk’s voice snaps him out of his trance, and he immediately shakes off the lovestruck look to see his two employees peeking out from the backroom with judgemental expressions painted over their features. “Uh, hey guys. You’re back.”

“Glad you noticed,” Sanha snorts. “So, you gonna finish those roses, or? Keep daydreaming?”

Ugh, roses. Why have roses when you can have sunflowers?

“Yeah, I’m coming. Thanks for doing the delivery, by the way.”

“I mean, that’s kind of our job. But you’re welcome,” Minhyuk replies, sharing a mischievous look with Sanha that Eunwoo nearly misses. “Maybe you can repay us by telling what happened when we were out?”

“Haha, very funny. Go help me finish the order or else I’m cutting your pay for this week.”

Red roses still weren’t his favorite flower, but Eunwoo supposes they still had some sort of thing to do with love. Maybe he didn’t have to hate them so much after all.

-

fin.

I wrote a thing

Ok so. I wrote this for a non existent fandom, so I’m posting it here. Since probably none of you know who these characters are, I’ll explain briefly.

This is in the book superpowereds by drew Hayes, which is basically my hero academia but with college students. The people here are :

Nick : grew up in Vegas, designated team tactician, really smart/manipulative, controls luck, Vince’s best friend

Vince : homeless kid, has a dad who he loves very much, absorbs any kind of energy and redirects it, nicks best friend

Alice : rich, likes makeup, warrior, daddy issues, floats and controls gravity Mary’s best friend

Mary : lives in the woods her whole life, telepath/telekinesist alices best friend, Hershel’s girlfriend

Hershel/Roy: two minds one body, hershel is a nerd, Roy is a fake cowboy fuqboi, Hershel turns into Roy after he drinks whisky , Roy is super strong. Mary’s boyfriend

Ok.

Title : 200 points

Tw : panic attack

General : angst and fluff, happy ending

Vince Reynolds was brave. He was also the most selfless person you could ever meet. He would never hesitate to put himself between danger and an innocent person, no matter the risk. There were even less things Vincewould not do for his loved ones. However, when it came to Nick, Vince was sort of a coward.

Nick Campbell was smart. there was no denying it. he was also extremely perceptive. sure mary was his friend, so she was biased. but if you asked anyone he ever met, they would all tell you.the same thiàg. he was so good some people believed him to be telepathic. however, when it came to vince, Nick was a dumb fool.

Mary could kind of understand the problem, but honestly it was a quick fix. Assuming they got over themselves obviously

knowing Nick, the obliviousness might even be intentional . either that, mary had become tremendously good at reading people, or she only knew because of her telepathy. seeing the looks alice gave them as they were cuddling on the couch, she highly doubted that.

as captivating s seeing these two making heart eyes at each other was, tonight was date night, and there was non way mary was making hershel wait. she looked at alice, and grinned. with a little luck, this would be interesting.

000

Neck knew trouble when he saw it, and right now trouble was taking Alice Adair’s form. Now, she would have seemed totally friendly to anyone, all big smile and long blond hair. But Nick had been living in melbrook for the past two years. This particular smile, he knew to avoid. It was the one Alice wore seconds before beating the shit out of someone.

Apparently, Nick wasn’t the only one smelling trouble, since Vince wriggled free of Nicks arms the moment Alice stood up. He planted a peck on Nicks cheek and got up. “Yup. Time for snacks.” Nick however, didn’t get the chance to run.

Alice sat down in the couch next to him, and started talking to him about a show she had started watching. This was definitely way too weird for Nicks likings.

When Vince returned five minutes later, Alice’s smile was back. So this wasn’t just a matter with Nick, Vince was [conserné] too. He opened a bag of Cheerios, and waited for doomsday to start.

Alice plunged her hand into the bag. “Sooooo… do you want to play a game ? Because there is no way I’m gonna watch a slasher movie again.”. She was smiling again.

000

This smelled so so bad. there was no way this could turn out fine. Not with that look in alices eyes. Apparently, Nick didn’t think so, since he agreed with Alice. However, he was no fool.

“What’s the bet ?”

Alices grin grew even larger, if that was possible. “The loser’s to tell the truth, the truth and nothin’ but the truth for a whole hour.” She swallowed her mouth full of chips. “And the winner gets to ask whatever questions they want.”

And just like that shit went down.

Turned out that the game in question was actually just dance. It turned out that Vince was absolutely awful at everything including following a rhythm. It also turned out that Nick was an amazing dancer.

He moved with the music, mirroring the guide without even really looking at it, moving with the music and actually looking like it didn’t take all of Vince’s hcp focus to be able to follow. Yeah, Nick was good. But Alice was better.

“Beat you !” This had been a close call, only 200 points between them, but Nick had lost anyways. Vince would have blamed it on luck, if this wasn’t the sixth time she beat him. It had only taken one experience for Vince to accept his loss, but Nick didn’t give up as easily. But 6 losses had been enough.

“Fine you win, whatever.” He crashed on the couch next to Vince. It wasn’t like he was actually tired, but he put on a show anyways. Nick threw his head back and closed his eyes. Which were actually visible. He had ditched the sunglasses earlier, now only wearing them outside of melbrook. Vince had mixed feelings on the question. One one hand, he kinda missed them. but on the other hand, now he could actually look into Nicks deep brown eyes.

Nick snapped his eyes open, staring at Vince. “You have gold in your eyes.” This was such a simple realization. Yet, somehow it changed everything. Nicks eyes still had gold in them, even when he wasn’t channeling luck.

Nick raised an eyebrow. “Yeah ? They do ?” Vince heard Alice sNicker behind them, and she threw him a knowing look.

“Nevermind”. Socialize now, freak out after. Right now, he would just ignore everything and Nick beautiful eyes and Nicks arms around him and Nicks breath in his hair and-

Vince hoped Alice had forgotten the bet

000

Alice was thinking about the bet.

Actually, she was thinking about the exact way she had phrased it, andmentaly patted herself on the back for it. She was a genius.

Vince was a blushing mess. He looked like he was having a crisis, his head in Nicks lap, but still refusing to meet his eyes. This was way more than what Alice had expected, but she was not going to complain. The bet would settle everything, if it worked as she planned it. And it would. She grinned. “So. The bet. You’re both losers, pay up.”

“Wait what ? Losers ? Who said anything about both of us doing the thing ?” Nick asked. Alice started at him, preparing herself for a staring contest, but Nicks eyes wandered around for a bit before sighing. “Well played.”

Alice couldn’t help but smile at that. That really was one of her best ones. “I don’t actually have a lot of questions, since I know more or less everything about you two.” Vince and Nick exchanged looks. It wasn’t totally true, and all of them knew it, but it wasn’t important right now. “I do have one question though.” What was important right now was what she was going to ask. “How are you both so oblivious ?”

The boys looked at each other with a silent question mark.

She threw her hands in the air. “Seriously. I’m not that surprised about Vince, but what the hell Nick ?” Alice wasn’t angry per se, she just wanted what was best for her friends, and this had been going on for too long. “How much does it take for you two to realize you like each other ? It’s not that hard ! Hershel and Mary figured it out !” They probably needed privacy, so she stormed out of the room, only leaving the angry mask once she was on her bed. There, she started laughing.

000

What did she mean What did she mean what did she mean what did-

“Ok. There is a lot to unpack here.” Nick joked. He was trying to keep a cool facade on, even if Vince probably knew him too well to be fooled by it. Right now though, the boy seemed in shock as he stared at Nick, mouth slightly agape. “Look I-“

“Oh my god.”

“I know this is-“

“Oh my GOD. Nononononono ! This isn’t happening! No fucking way !”

Nick took a sharp breath in and muttered something that, to anyone else would be intelligible, but to Nick sounded a lot like “I’m gonna kill her” She just had to say it, uh ? She just had to ruin this for him ? For what ? Because she thought it was mutual ? Nick hadn’t even realized he had stood up in the middle of Vince’s rumbling. Alice was a fucking fool to think that good things could ever happen to Nicholas Campbell. Luck had never been on his side once in his life.

Vince had shut up in the mean time and now he was staring at Nick, who was giggling to himself. Luck was never on his side. It was kind of funny now that he thought about it. “Luck is never on my side uh ?” This definitely sounded a lot more hoarse than intended. He also had his hair in his face, which prompted Nick to raise a hand to his face, only to realize that he had been crying. Luck was never on his side. It was not so funny anymore. Why had he even started to hope anything good could happen to him ? O. Because a good thing had actually happened to him. Vince happened to him. All of melbrook too. And now that was gone gone. Vince was gone.

He couldn’t stand having Vince just right next to him, talking to him, if he believed that Vince’s lips were forming words behind the ringing in his hears, and still being gone. So he ran. Because Vince was gone.

Because Alice had to ask this stupid question. No. Because he had lost at this stupid game. It was all his fault. His own damn fault. Because he had been 200 points behind. And that had been enough. Enough to lose fucking everything.

None of this made sense. Why didn’t anything make sense ? Everything always did in Nicks head. Always had. The small part of his mind that managed to understand this also managed to register what was happening as a panic attack, even if he didn’t get that now.

Right now, Nick didn’t even actually register where he was. He didn’t register when he heard shouting from outside his room. He didn’t register when Mary a,d Hershel came back. He didn’t even register when he passed out.

000

That’s morning was tense to say the least. Nick, Vince and Alice had yet to say a word, and Mary’s meaningless attempts at conversation soon stopped. Hershel didn’t know what happened last night, but the atmosseemed to weight him. He soon left to go tak a jog around campus. The others were a mess. Alice hadn’t put on a single drop of makeup and Vince and Nick hadn’t even made eye contact. She had come in with Nick on the middle of a panic attack, so of course she knew what had happened last night. There was going to be a lot of communicating needed, and needed soon.

She sighed. First, the boys, then Alice. Then everything would eventually fall into place. “Alice, can I tak to you for a sec ?”

Alice shrugged and got out of her sit. Nick started to stand up, but Mary kept him in place. He shot her a death glare that would have made anyone shiver. Anyone but Mary. She and Alice left the room, Mary locking it behind her. That was done at least. Now they would have to wait and see how things turned out. In the mean time, she had a best friends to comfort, jusdging by the tears building up in alices eyes.

000

Vince felt sick. He had since last night. And right now, in the kitchen, next to his best friend (could he even call him that anymore ?) he wanted nothing but puke. He felt claustrophobic. Everything around him was too close too close. He stood up, put his head in the sink, and let it all out. He expected to feel better afterwards. But he didn’t. He just didn’t want to puke anymore. The worst part was that he expected Nick to help him through it, to pull his air back and rub circles in his back. But he hadn’t. And that hurt like a bitch.

All of that because of a stupid crush. He had lost Nick over a stupid crush. He wanted to cry. So he did. He just cried on the kitchen floor. It was his fault. So he apologized.“I’m sorry. I’m so so so sorry…” I’m sorry I like you like that. I’m sorry I couldn’t get over it before it was too late. I’m sorry.

He couldn’t get it out. But he needed to. So he took a deep breath and got up. He took a second breath and wiped the tears. He took a third breath and made eye contact with Nick. He took a fourth breath and thought about what he was going to say. He took a fifth breath and opened his mouth.

“I’m so sorry I like you.” This didn’t sound like Vince’s voice. In fact it wasn’t. Nick was gripping his chair so hard Vince was afraid it might actually break. Nicks knuckles were white because of the strength he was using right now. He had put his sunglasses on.

“What ?” Vince finally came to his senses. “What do you mean ?” He plopped down to the ground.

“I like you.” Nick said through gritted teeth. “Like-like you.”

“What ?” What ? What was happening? What ?

“What do you mean what ! What ? What !? Do you want me to spell it out ? Isn’t it enough that I lost my best friend” his voice cracked “because I’m fucking in love with you ? Do you want me to print it on my forehead ? ‘IM THE POOR GUY IN LOVE WITH HIS BEST FRIEND’ ?” at this point Nick had actually left indents on the chair, and there was no doubt that his eyes were closed tight under his sunglasses. “Please don’t hate me.”

As if Vince ever could. “You, you really like me ? You mean that ?” It’s not like he really had to ask. Nick wouldn’t have been like that if it wasn’t. But a small part of his brain still thought this was some kind of messed up dream.

He got up and took a step towards Nick.

000

Alice was a mess. She really really was. She just wanted to curl up in a ball and disappear through a crack on the wall. The guilt was crushing her. Knowing that she caused her friends to be in so much pain was eating her alive. But she still came talk to Mary. Because she had no rights to feel that way. Alice had made her bed, now she was going to sleep in it.

But when Mary actually started painting her nails, she was starting suffocate. And Mary was there. She was there when Alice finally let it out. It felt good to have a shoulder to cry on.

She didn’t know how long she had been crying. Maybe a few minute, maybe a few hours. It didn’t matter. “I hate this.” She croaked. “I hate this so so much. And it’s all” my fault. The words weren’t said, but it didn’t take a telepath to guess.

“It’s gonna be fine you’ll see” Mary said as she stroked alices hair. It was going to be alright. “But you’re going to have to talk to them sweetie.”

Alice knew that. But not right now. Everything would fall in place eventually.

000

Nick was keeping his eyes shut, and there was like a ringing in his ears. That was probably why he gasped when he felt Vince’s fingers on his own. They were gently removing Nicks hands from the chair he was sitting on. Why was Vince doing that. It made no sense. But it felt nice. And Nick was a bastard, he had every rights to be selfish.

Then he opened his eyes. And Vince was smiling at him, for some reason. Now, had this been anyone but Vince, Nick would have recognized the signs, the blown pupils, the faster-than-average heart rate, everything. But when it came to Vince Reynolds, Nick was a dumb fool.

Nick removed his sunglasses.

“I-“ Vince started. “I love you too, you know ? You’re like, the most wonderful person I’ve ever met ? And I, I just was, you know, too scared to admit it. Even to myself. I guess I’m kinda a cowards when it comes to you uh ?” He let out a nervous laugh.

Nicks normally extremely fast brain took some time to register what Vince was saying. Apparently, impulse control was lost in the process, since he soon found himself kissing Vince. And it was the best day of his life.

Okay, there was a lot of teeth clanging and awkward nose poking, but it was still the best kiss Nick had ever had. And somehow he found himself lying on the floor next to Vince, laughing.

000

Mary returned to the kitchen after making sure they sorted it out. They were still on the floor, arguing about Nicks horror movies when she came in. They looked so happy. But Alice needed to sort everything out. So she cleared her throat.

“Alice wants to talk to you.” Mary said. She opened the door and Alice stepped in.

Mary quickly retreated to Hershel’s room, to give them some privacy. Herself could use some privacy with her boyfriend, she thought, as she started kissing him. It had been way too long.

“Star Trek movie night !” Hershel cried.

Yup. Long overdue.

000

When Alice walked in, Nick didn’t think much of it. He knew that he should probably be angry at her or something, but he just wasn’t. Didn’t mean he couldn’t use this at his advantage. He smirked.

“So. Alice Adair is finally returning.” He stood up.

“Listen, I’m so so so so-“ Nick placed a finger on her mouth. This was revenge.

“I know. But it’s gonna take more than an apology to make it up to me.” He was enjoying this far too much wasn’t he ?

Alice started rambling again about what she was willing to do to make it up to them, and how she should have never done it that way and-

“I have the perfect idea,”Nick cut her off. “I want you to support me next time I want to do a slasher movie marathon.” Alice burst out laughing. And just like that she knew she was forgiven. “Now Vince, what do you want out of this ?” Nick asked.

“Uh… I want you to ? Uh… ask your chef to make us food for an entire week ?” Alice shook his hand.

“You have a deal.”

Needless to say, the next few days, when they were not in the hcp, were spent with Nick and Vince being glued to each other (not that it was any different from before), and eating more food than at thanksgiving. Oh and also very bad horror movies.

This was originally supposed to be pure fluff about these two dorks finally getting together, but it sorta came out of hand. I guess I wasn’t done with the angst from two days ago, but at least no one died !

BnHA Chapter 142: HHAH!! *GRUNT* *PUNCHING NOISES*

Previously on BnHA: Tamaki faced off against three villains on his own. At first he managed to keep them at bay by generating a bunch of giant kraken arms, which was badass. But then it turned out one of the villains had an eating quirk and just kept eating the damn arms like fucking Gluttony or Monkey D. Luffy or something. The other two villains worked together to beat Tamaki up, but then Tamaki neutralized one of their quirks and fucking absorbed the other one’s quirk and used it against him. Needless to say, he beat them, and it was pretty cool, although I’m not quite sure it was cool enough to warrant an entire chapter being devoted to it, but what are you gonna do. We’re moving on now anyway, so that’s that.

Today on BnHA: Tamaki passes out after winning his fight. We cut back to the rest of the heroes as they make their way down the neverending corridor. Mimic starts messing with the walls again and tries to crush Aizawa, but Fat Gum knocks him out of the way and takes the hit for him. At this point things become very jumbled, but basically FG and Kirishima end up separated from the rest of the group, and find themselves in a pit somewhere with two new villains. One of the villains is a big guy who likes punching shit, and the other is a Buddhist monk who likes to stand around and do absolutely nothing at all. The punching guy punches FG and Kiri a bunch, and Kiri has trouble withstanding it even with his quirk. FG yells at him to not give up and to maintain his will to fight no matter what. He and Kiri face the bad guys in determination and are all “we’re gonna punch ‘em some more, goddammit.”

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 175 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

all right kids. it’s been two weeks since I last read a chapter. I just did a quick refresher of the past dozen chapters or so, partly to remind myself of everything that was going on, and partly to remind myself of all the cool things that have happened in this arc. it kinda helped. somewhat

Tamaki’s fight didn’t really drag on that much. it was just two chapters. it felt like an eternity -- despite the fact that I actually like Tamaki a lot -- but it really wasn’t that long

and yeah, it’s been like four chapters since they started this raid, and all they’ve basically done so far is run down a few hallways. but I feel like things have to pick up soon, so we’re going to press on

BnHA got the Jump cover again! hopefully that means things are about to get exciting

ooh and there’s a color page too

basically, now that he’s finished beating these three assholes, he’s dosed them with a bit of poison to keep them in check, and now he is passing out. shit

also, “that was far more trouble than it should have been” is one of the more accurate summaries I’ve read in some time

so now we’re finally getting back to our badass 1-A boys! yesssss. I missed you lunkheads

I kinda just want the rest of the arc to be them busting through wall after wall of the labyrinth until they finally catch up to where Mirio is. then Aizawa neutralizes Overhaul’s quirk and they knock him out and rescue Eri and everything is happy and good again. and Nighteye announces that All Might is not going to die after all, and it turns out this whole time he was just misremembering an old cliffhanger episode of the canon All Might anime. and they all live happily ever after etc. etc.

(ETA: you know that anon ask about what I’d change about this arc? scratch everything I wrote in response to that. pencil this in. done and done)

but SOMETHING TELLS ME this is not going to happen

all right, so we’re back in the ol’ villain labyrinth

I’m having so much trouble spelling the word ‘labyrinth.’ I keep mixing up where the y and the i are supposed to go. stupid English language

what the fuck is this title

lol wtf

(ETA: now that I know the meaning of this title, I simultaneously have new respect for the title itself, and new exasperation towards Horikoshi for somehow still failing to see the problem with this extremely dull matchup. listen dude. no one fucking cares if “defense wins championships.” I’m just a poor soul trying to stay awake during panel after panel of blurry punching action. please never do this to us again)

Kirishima’s all “is senpai gonna be okay”, and no one fucking knows, Kiri

but no. he’s not. why on earth did you all leave him. whatever

FG is annoyed that they’re doubting Tamaki

um, no, this is the kind of stupid policy that this series has so far done its best to avoid. in fact, FG, I’ll see your point and raise you one “a true hero offers help even when it’s not asked for”, which is almost the exact opposite of what you’re saying. so WHAT IS THE TRUTH

oh my god Kirishima is immediately doing a 180 from being worried about Tamaki to being all “HE’LL BE FINE”

so am I to understand that you can get Kirishima to say or do anything just by implying that it is or isn’t manly

...actually, yeah, that checks out

so Kiri is fiercely saying that he’s still worried, but he has no choice but to believe in him

meanwhile Rock Lock, whose name was actually mentioned back in like chapter 138 but I missed it but I picked up on it when I went back to refresh my memory, is being annoyed by their enthusiasm. yet again

I feel like Rock Lock actually loves these kids now. right? they’re so fucking lovable. how can you not

(ETA: everyone gives in to class A’s charms eventually)

so now they’ve found some stairs and they’re all “let’s take these stairs”

but then they’re like “maybe we shouldn’t take these stairs”

this kind of indecisive bullshit is exactly why this arc has taken 500 chapters so far you guys. come the fuck on already

Aizawa is suspicious because wth happened to that guy who was manipulating the corridors before

well wasn’t he high af though? so maybe the quirk enhancing drug just wore off and he passed out?

Aizawa is speculating that his range might be limited and he can’t sense them all the way over here. or maybe he’s distracted by the other guys who were still fighting him earlier

I’m tired of trying to sum this all up so I’m just gonna post it

this is the room where Tamaki just finished kicking these guys’ asses. oh shit

now Irinaka’s eye is peeking out, and he’s all mad that the three of them lost to just one guy

and now for some reason we’re cutting back to where Bubble Girl and Captain Cockroach (I forget his name. but it was basically something like that) are restraining the villains who they previously stayed behind to battle

they’re questioning why the villains who were in hiding came out of the woodworks to attack them when they could have potentially gotten away if they’d just stayed put

but one of the villains says that if they’d done that, “Overhaul would have our heads”

this is why I don’t really understand villains like that last bunch who are so fucking loyal to a guy who clearly could not give less of a shit about them

and it seems like most of the current Eights are more loyal to the previous boss than to Overhaul

clearly the previous boss should have picked a 13-year-old peace-loving suburban Japanese kid to be his next heir rather than Chisaki. this is what happens when you don’t have Reborn around

anyway, even though these guys are all complaining about Overhaul, they’re all certain that the heroes aren’t going to succeed in capturing him

-- WHAT IN THE

DID A GIANT BATTERING RAM THING JUST EXPLODE OUT OF THE WALL AND SLAM INTO AIZAWA BECAUSE HOLY SHIT?!

AND NOW IT’S MAKING A HOLE IN THE WALL AND SHOVING AIZAWA INTO IT SHIIIIIT

LEAVE AIZAWA ALONE FOR ONCE, HE NEVER GETS TO DO ANYTHING IN THESE ARCS. LET HIM KICK SOME ASS

Fat Gum is tackling the giant wall hand and knocking Aizawa away from it!

so now Fat Gum has been punted through the hole in the wall instead

I’m relieved Aizawa is still with the kids, but we’re staying with FG, and I s2g if we have to spend another two chapters away from the protagonist watching characters who -- as lovable as they are -- we’d never even met before the start of this arc, I’m not gonna be super happy

-- OH MY GOD

KIRI YOU BLOCKHEAD WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

motherfucker, he jumped in to take the hit for Aizawa too and then Fat Gum obliviously jumped in behind him and Kiri got sucked in and FG didn’t even realize

well this is just fucking great

so now some guy is emerging from the shadows ready to have fisticuffs!

and Kiri is going into Unbreakable mode again!

should you really be using your trump card right away like that. the trump card which you can only hold for a very short amount of time

um what in the

I’m not really enjoying how blurry and indistinct and difficult-to-follow these action panels have been getting as of late. it’s starting to feel like this series is finally entering a sophomore slump. get it together BnHA, c’mon

anyway, this guy looks to be punching Fat Gum really hard and possibly repeatedly. kind of like when All Might fought the Noumu at USJ

hmm

honestly it sounds like this guy was born to fight Kirishima in an epic showdown

“people oughta kill each other using just the power they got in their bodies” oh, you wacky Honorable Villains. you guys are always all over the place

FG’s turning to Kirishima, but OH SHIT

relax, I’m sure he’s fine though

ah, yes, good

this is probably gonna look really cool in the anime which will make up for this panel being something of a blurry mess right now

(ETA: just to clarify, when I originally read this chapter, I wound up with FA’s original scanlation which was significantly lower in quality. I’ve since found their version 2.0 which used cleaned-up scans which are very much improved.

here’s the original for comparison:

so yeah, the improved scans alone help to make this fight a significantly better read this time around. it’s still dull, but at least it’s readable now lol)

now FG is... trying to punch the other guy, but like. well, take a look

FG is very confused

and now another villain is there! were you there this whole time omg

okay so it must be his barrier then, right?

must... resist... urge to call him Chance the Rappa. no one else thinks it is funny. just you

but you know what. it’s my recap though. so

(ETA: honestly, this association is the only reason why he’s one of the few Eight Expendables whose names I actually recall)

so now Chance is punching FG again and it looks like it hurt him. damn

you know what I didn’t sign up for here. another fight with a tier 3 character where there is no plot advancement and where the villain’s quirk appears to just be “I punch stuff real hard.” wtf. goddammit BnHA, I’m rooting for you so get your shit in order already

so now the barrier villain is referring back to the title and clearing all of that up

actually, Kiri is spear and shield all in one. just saying. boy knows how to throw a damn good punch. who do you think was smashing through all your labyrinth walls earlier

so now Kiri is climbing back to his feet and thinking that the dude’s punches hurt him even in his Unbreakable mode

now there’s a single flashback panel of Bakugou, and my god. I’ll take it. where are you, son. how’ve you been. how’s my other son. I’ve been stuck in a villain labyrinth with side characters for the past half dozen chapters. I hope you’re off having a nice time somewhere

Kirishima is looking like he’s about to get all When The Going Gets Tough THE TOUGH GET GOING

oh! what’s this??

is this... flashback Kiri???

are you telling me he’s not a natural bright flaming redhead. what the hell. next you’re gonna tell me Mina’s not a natural pink and that Deku’s been dying his hair green since childhood

although in Kirishima’s case, he did look up to that Crimson Riot guy seemingly in the same way Deku, Shouto, and Kacchan admired All Might, didn’t he? so maybe it’s got something to do with that

FG is shouting at him not to let up his Unbreakable mode, and that if his spirit breaks that’s when he’ll really lose

and the last page is just Kiri and FG looking gritty and determined. but Kiri’s in his Ben Grimm mode so it looks weird lol

look, I’m hella down for some Kiri flashbacks. I just don’t want this fight to take longer than one and a half chapters. that’s it. that’s my limit. starting a timer... now

BONUS:

I think maybe this bonus page is supposed to go with chapter 143, but eh. it works here too

so Rappa’s quirk is explained in another omake, and basically it’s something that allows him to rotate his shoulders really fast so he can punch a lot. to think, he could have been the next Michael Phelps, but instead he wound up being a third-rate villain in the most boring arc. such a waste

Tengai’s whole character just makes no sense to me whatsoever. why are you a villain. you’re so boring. nothing in your personality or backstory offers up any type of explanation for why you would be working for a murderous crime syndicate. it’s a complete mystery, but not in a cool way, more of a “none of this adds up in the slightest” type of way. just because you never open your eyes when you talk doesn’t make you cool you asshole

Why Vane is the Bestest Boy Ever

Welcome to my TEDtalk this is some real stuff ya’ll NEED to hear because Vane is the absolute best ( to me at least). Sorry this is jumbled af I don’t even know what I wrote. 

Listen I know I talk a lot about Vane and you’re probably sick and tired of it and I understand. BUT LIKE HEAR ME OUT FOR A MINUTE!

So I never really did the subquests early on in my playthrough of GBF mostly because I’m a dumbass and didn’t really realize they were there. ANYWAYS, so my first exposure of Vane came from his SR version (sadly, I don’t have his SSR version,,,,hhhhh please come home). I wasn’t too keen on him at first because he was an SR and in the beginning I was obsessed with getting SSR’s (instead of appreciating quality characters). 

The reason I first got into GBF was because of Lancelot, I thought he was super attractive and w o w cool this looks awesome! So I was hoping to get Lancelot more than anyone else. 

I digress, so I went through Vane’s fate episode really quick, and I just didn’t appreciate his character all too much. Seeing his art, I thought yeah he looked cool but he kinda looks like a smug jerk and I just did not care (especially since I was starting to like Will). I basically forgot I summoned him until I played Defender’s Oath. 

It brought him into a new light for me, because honestly, I did that side quest because of Lancelot. When we see Vane in DO, we see him as somewhat clueless, but overall, a nice guy who just wants to help his friends. I had very low expectations for him, and to just have him in my face acting like the most adorable thing ever was just hhhhhhhhhhh amazing. 

But it also made me get bored with Lancelot, because to me, it felt like all the other Dragon Knights had gotten character development except him. We constantly see Vane grow from being someone who was initially nervous about being Vice-Captain, to being more confident in his role and ensuring the public is happy. And that’s what I think separates Lancelot and Vane the most. While Lancelot does care for the people, he cares more for the well being of the country. Vane however, is just a ball of sunshine who wants to repay his kindness to those who need help (as seen with Bistro Feendrache). 

I’m not saying Lancelot is a bad person by any means, not at all, he is probably what is considered a more ‘ideal knight’ because of his undying loyalty to Feendrache, but Vane is someone who just doesn’t care for titles, he just wants to be by his friends’ side. 

I think his most stellar moment was in Divergent Knighthoods. THIS was what cemented my love for him as my fave character, not only in GBF, but in my entire life. We see him at his most fatherly and courageous form in this quest, and it just is the sweetest thing ever. He jumbles up a bit as Vice-Captain, he’s excitable and kinda immature compared to Lancelot, but that’s what makes him so strong. 

Divergent Knighthoods showed the BEST possible form of Vane by showing us his interactions with Team Chickadee. Sure, Arthur and Mordred were the focal point of it, but we see Vane’s development, as well how he helps the other two. Arthur and Mordred probably would not have gotten as good as they did if it weren’t for Vane. Vane taught them that being a knight doesn’t mean giving up on friendship and kindness, or forgetting what it means to be human. 

Vane is just that. Human. Lancelot and Percival constantly push themselves to be something greater than human, and Seigfried is considered to be god-tier to them. They all idealize Siegfried, but Lancelot and Percival want to be JUST like him that they focus solely on his actions, not why he does what he does. Vane, while he also looks to Siegfried as a role model, doesn’t feel the need to exemplify him. He feels fine the way he is, but he looks up to Siegfried as what greatness can achieve. He wants to be as skilled as Siegfried, but in his own way. 

Vane uses his emotions as a powerful weapon, while Lancelot and Percival try to repress them. They feel that emotions get in the way of decision-making, and that it’ll make them weaker. Vane just doesn’t give a crap and continues dancing to his own beat. He stepped up as a father-figure and mentor to Team Chickadee, and made them stronger by teaching them the importance of emotions. He even commented on something like that when he was interacting with Cruz. The poor boy just wasn’t emotional, and it worried Vane about what his life was like at home. He was so proud of Cruz when he even SMILED, and he treated it like a trophy. 

He’s a very supportive guy as seen when he constantly praised the team for slight accomplishments, even if they seemed stupid in the eyes of others. Lancelot has high expectations for them, and even though they wish to be knights when they’re older, he forgets they’re just kids. Vane knows that they’re just little kids, and he is one at heart, so he has no problem interacting with them and encouraging them to do better. He doesn’t need to act intimidating, because it’s just not in his nature. He doesn’t have to pretend to be someone he’s not, and uses his supposed ‘flaws’ as a tool to get better. 

I also wanna talk about what I think is a slight inferiority complex. Yeah, Vane loves himself, but he loves his friends a lot more. Especially Lancelot. Lancelot grew up with him and is basically his brother from another mother, and Vane trusts him completely. But we see throughout his fate episodes and special cutscenes that he knows Lancelot is more well-loved and respected than he will ever be. 

Valentines Day (year 2): “Aw, man. It's that time of year again... Sucks being that guy that doesn't get anything. Yeah... Oh well! I'll just pretend this chocolate I made came from a girl!”

Valentines Day (year 3): “Man, I knew he was popular... Speaking as a childhood friend, good for him. Bet he's a pretty happy camper. Sigh... I wonder if I'll ever...”

Happy Birthday (year 2): “Hehe, thanks for taking the time to deal with a bum like me! How old are you now? Are you really gonna waste your birthday hangin' around here? You want to be here? Aw man, quit jokin' around! It's not nice to tease people, you know.”

Happy Birthday (year 4): “ I shouldn't stay too long, I don't want to wear you out even more.”

Happy Holidays (year 2):  “ Huh? Oh, hey, (Captain). Are you free right now? Good thing I bumped into you! All right, you get the pleasure of spending the day with me! Not! Yeah, like you'd want to hang out with me, hahaha!” 

Fate Episode [sr version]: “ Y-you really think so? I'm really just trying to be more like Lancey. “

[after you compliment him for being more like Lancelot than he knows]:  “Heheh, thank you! Hearing you say that gives me a real boost, (Captain)!”

LIKE THIS BOY LEGITIMATELY THINKS HANGING OUT WITH HIM IS LIKE THE WORST PUNISHMENT IN HISTORY. It’s so sad because he’s such a lovable goof, and the fact he thinks he’s such a bother because he’s not like Lancelot is just....my heart...

I don’t think he’s actually AWARE of his insecurities when it comes to these sort of things, like he can recognize it in other people, but just can’t see himself being jealous of Lancelot, his best friend. He is not really given much credit for his work, and most dismiss him as a loud idiot who’s just Vice-Captain. Percival’s insults towards Vane doesn’t get him down, but the fact that Lancelot gets more praise for being Captain probably irks him to some degree. 

Honestly, Vane has so much to offer. He is such a romantic, and reading the part in his sr skills episode WHERE HE LITERALLY REMEMBERED A SUBORDINATES ANNIVERSARY AND TOLD HIM TO LEAVE TO SPEND TIME WITH HIS WIFE! Like, catch any of the other guys even remembering what day it is. 

Knights of the Order of White Dragons: With all due respect, First Officer, sir, why are you trying to dismiss me so early? There's still plenty of work to do…

Vane: But isn't it your anniversary today? Don't you think you should go home and be with your wife?

Knights of the Order of White Dragons: Y-you remembered?

Vane: Of course! You were gushing about it the other day!

Vane: One look at that grin on your face and it was seared into my memory!

Knights of the Order of White Dragons: But circumstances are different now…

Knights of the Order of White Dragons: The people are still uneasy after the incident the other day! It's not right for me to get to relax with my wife!

Vane: Don't be stupid! Are you really gonna let this emergency ruin your fun? That's even worse!

LOOK AT HIM! LOOK AT THIS!! He is just all about positivity and having fun, this guy is such a cutie. He just cares about the little people so much. NOT TO MENTION HIS LOVE FOR ELDERLY PEOPLE. He went on a tangent in the special cutscenes about how he wanted to help the old grandmas who helped in his childhood, and the children who appeared in Halloween. This guy cares a lot for the people and he just continues giving love and care for them all despite being considered a lesser version of his best friend from others.  

Vane is by no means a lesser version of Lancelot. He’s a great companion that contrasts well with Lancelot, by reminding him to take care of himself. He bakes, he cooks, he cleans, he does plenty of stuff for the crew and is such hubby material that I BELIEVE EVERY PERSON NEEDS SOMEONE LIKE VANE IN THEIR LIFE. Vane is the gift that keeps on giving, who’ll never stop giving. He cares too much to even bother to think about his own health, and is just the absolute best. 

Maybe I’ll fix this later on idk but like if I continue I’ll ramble for hours about why he’s so precious and ya’ll don’t wanna see that from me. 

But yeah tldr: VANE IS FREAKIN AMAZING AND I LOVE HIM

Soulless Riffing: Brainless Wrap-up

I got a supernatural action/romance book series as a gift that’s just riddled with stuff that I hate….and as a steampunk Victorian London action romance story filled with werewolves and vampires…it’s yeah gonna be easy to poke fun at.

I just want to say, it’s totally cool if you like this story or ones like it!  It’s certainly a better caliber than a lot of what I make fun of…however…I can’t help but want to make fun of it.

Over here for the 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7+8, 9, 10+11, 12, 13, 14, and Epilogue.

So here are my final thoughts on the book Soulless for those interested in such things:

It’s not good quality but hell, you’re probably not reading magical woman in Victorian times bangs hot werewolf while hitting zombies with an umbrella cause you want really deep themes and tight prose.

Despite my grumblings on Alexia’s Italian prosecution complex and supernaturals as an oppressed race, it’s not really that problematic.  I think it’s a pinch ignorant and unintentionally glib, but dang I’ve seen way worse.

I think the book’s greatest strength and weakness are kinda one in the same, it just depends on your perspective. 

That would be the abiding and consistent frivolousness of it all.  I personally feel as if it hurts the story cause it feels as if there’s no stakes and that the conflict doesn’t matter.  But you can see the appeal.  Even when shit is really going down, it’s not properly stressful or scary.  Humor is never far away, it’s just straight up fluff!

The plot contradicts itself for no apparent reason, it has giant holes, and what sense it does make is highly dependent on every single character (even ones meant to be smart) not having enough brain function to make sentences by themselves.

This is more subjective but the relationship at the center wasn’t great if you ask me. The conflict is all childish, with no suspense that it’ll be a more than chapter long hindrance. The main differences in their personalities are basically on gendered lines, with a little werewolf vs. human culture for color.  Alexia has lower self-esteem, gets sad sometimes, is more likely to be polite, and is more reluctant about a sexual relationship.  Besides that they’re incredibly similar to one another. They’re antagonistic, strong-willed, self-righteous, frivolous, stupid, short-sighted, not self-aware, and have similar politics. They’re so similar when they have an argument they just circle the drain.  Nobody adds anything or learns because they’re just vomiting the same unprocessed, inept perspective at one another.  You’ll never be short on conflict, but it’s all non-arguments about petty bullshit that don’t even manage to be funny.  

For something that’s meant to be fun and frivolous there’s a surprising lack of action and sex. The story wants to both be kinda that virginal ravishment and female empowered libidos at the same time and it just...doesn’t mesh. I honestly feel they should have leaned more on having a horny protag, and just played up feigning confidence, clumsiness, with a bit of uncertainty.  Instead Alexia both wants to both spend a week locked in a cabin fucking this man, but also IS THIS AROUSAL????? WHAT DOES IT MEAN!?!?!?!?!  There is 1 page of a sex scene, the make out scenes were frankly underwhelming and froze the pacing, and Alexia only has 1 proper fight in it all and that’s over by what page 5? LAME!

I feel as if she should’ve leaned more into the cheesy ridiculousness of it all.  Like her umbrella is actually a living familiar (her father’s) who’s perhaps at first begrudgingly working with Alexia.  The umbrella is sarcastic and dramatic but ends up being deeply loyal to Alexia. Named Parry or Saul for parasol?

Her evil family, or maybe a higher up in government is actually connected to the genocide club? DUN DUN DUN!

Queen Victoria seems like a delicate older woman, but in a climactic battle it turns out she can take care of herself and says some dumb nonsensical one liner like, “JUST LIE BACK AND THINK OF ENGLAND!” when she blunderbuss’ the antagonist out a grand window in her castle.

Well…to be fair… I haven’t read the whole series so who knows if that last one happens.

But let me give you a proper Too long; Didn’t read:

On the good side:

It’s easy to read frivolous fun that indulges in the Victorian aesthetic with a supernatural flavor. The opening of the story, I still contend is good. There is genuine friendship tenderness in this story that is lovely.  It doesn’t take itself too seriously, and sprinkles humor throughout.   The lead has sexual agency, women’s libidos are celebrated, and there’s an implication that sex outside of marriage is fine.  It does follow a sensible (if could be improved) pattern of intrigue, romantic development, climax, and conclusion. It’s also written in a particular voice that many would probably enjoy.  The voice is horny, juvenile, and superior both in the respect that Alexia is NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS but also a snotty kinda British superior attitude for being witty enough that your backhanded compliment seemed polite enough that it wasn’t recognized for what it really was.

…Okay so maybe that last line was in itself a backhanded compliment.  I found the voice irritating, but I can understand why it’s attractive to so many young women.  What does any reasonable person want from a young adult novel aimed at young women?

For it to be sexy, silly, that the protagonist is better than the average person and by extension YOU ARE for enjoying her adventures.  And hey listen, young women are shit on ALL THE TIME for all sorts of bullshit.  Women should have these outlets to just briefly, BRIEFLY feel as if they’re smart, powerful, and sexy!  I give a hearty fuck yeah to that!

On the bad side:

There is a caveat I have with what I just said above. Some of the superior tone of Soulless (and it’s not exclusive to this title I assure you) is that some of the superior tone comes down to misogyny, classism, and even a little of what’s appropriate for a GOOD MAN (beyond yanno don’t be shitty.)  I cannot abide by that.

The story’s frivolousness when it comes to serious topics is a disservice.  

It could have easily been more fun.

The story could have also been EASILY molded into a plot that made more sense.

The story has no idea how to be subtle…which helps it feel as if it’s a YA novel.  This novel books itself as adult, but it’s really really, really, really, REALLY a young adult book and it should have been labeled/marketed/etc as such.  I came in expecting a fun saucy novel, but left feeling condensed to by a 16 year old. Like honestly, I feel as if she wrote a young adult novel, her editor wanted a sex scene at the end, so she quick pushed out a page of a tame one, and because of that they felt weird labeling it YA.

But what the hell do I know?

If you want turn your brain off fun and like supernatural Victorian hooey? Go for it!

If you don’t like those things? Be a butthead like me and hate read things for a masochistic thrill.

Did you know there’s a sequel? THIS BAD BOY IS A SERIES AND YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO SUFFER THROUGH SCROLLING PAST MY RIFFS ON THE SEQUEL TOO SOON BUCKO! WOOHOO!

Northern Migration- Chapter 19 (Notes + Preview)

Hey guys! Sorry for the long wait between updates. I had to work on another project for a bit, but now we’re back and with a chapter that will hopefully be a satisfying follow-up than the last. Hopefully. I don’t know. Like always, these spoilers contain massive spoilers for the chapter so don’t cheat. Read it first, then you can come back to this. Without further ado, let’s jump right into it.

 Spoilers Ahead!

As many of you guys probably know, I’ve been trying for months now to find a good place to drop in the fact that Johann has a massive crush on Avi. And thank god I finally did it now because this shit is about to get relevant.

Also, I have no idea how to write Leon, especially when he’s not being tormented by Taako. The first time I wrote that scene, I accidentally made him a Merle copy and that wasn’t going to fly around here. I have standards to maintain.

I hope Lucretia’s plan makes sense. I really wanted to give me a moment in this chapter to act on it, but it never really came up. I kept the mention of it in though since I like the realness of having a strategy that we never get to see work or fail because the circumstances to use it never come up.

And, oh my god. This is going to be the last time I’m going to get to outline what sacrifices Avi, Killian, and Ren made. The end to this stupid arc is almost in sight! So Killian forgot Brian and had to give up her crossbow. Avi lost some vitality that makes it so that he has a constant headache and he’s been aged another 15 years. And Ren lost vision in both of her eyes. These were the hardest sacrifices for me to go through with, but I told myself that whatever I spun on the wheel for them was going to have to stick (within reason, of course). I just really wish I had the space to write out the scene where all this happened because damn. This is really not satisfying to just read about. Maybe I’ll make a quick one shot of this scene. Who knows.

The little Stevie, Magnus, and Merle scene was originally much different. I actually rewrote it last night because I just knew that this here is a lot better than what I had before.

I also don’t know if Magnus for sure would like Bon Jovi, but how can you not jam out to Living on a Prayer?

I know reading a copy and paste of the show’s villain speech is annoying and smacks you right out of the narrative, but I didn’t have the energy to rewrite it and skipping it would ruin the build of tension. I tried to only include what’s necessary so that the flow into the addition of Edward and Lydia’s body collection would be smooth.

Fun fact: originally, Lucretia was  not the only one who realized Edward and Lydia’s scheme. I originally had it so that Killian figured it out as well, and so when Lucretia shouted for Julia to kill her, we would get this moment where Julia refused but Killian would take her crossbow and shoot Lucretia dead (which wouldn’t last since Edward and Lydia would just heal her right up with their Wonderland magic). Of course, I then remembered that Killian SACRIFCED HER CROSSBOW so all that got cut. RIP EVERY ATTEMPT I MAKE OF GIVING KILLIAN SHIT TO DO IM SORRY

I know Griffin just said that the Hunger’s spies were white figures and that probably means they’re just like Princess Mononoke’s forest spirits, but I really wanted something horrific looking. Let me have this.

No one is surprised that the one armed mannequin is Taako. After all, he knew what Davenport was going to ask for when building the engine before he could even say it. He knows what his captain wants.

Okay, so let’s talk about that bastardization of Arms Outstretched. One of my goals for this story is to pick up ideas Griffin mentioned he wanted to do for Balance that he never got the chance to act upon. One of those is the side story of having to escape from the astral plane. So, that’s what we’re going to do here. Next chapter is going to be about Taako and Lucretia escaping death, so get ready for a short but hopefully enjoyable break from the sludge that is Wonderland.

If you’re wondering why Taako couldn’t overpower the plane’s pull this time, it’s because he’s also dead. He belongs in the astral plane and the forced of the universe knew that. He didn’t have the strength to fight back against it.

Sorry not sorry for that chapter title lol

And, as always, here is the preview for the next chapter, which should be coming out at a much more reasonable timetable than this past one:

“I can’t tell if this is stupid or kinda genius,” Magnus says, switching his eyes between the control board usually commandeered by Davenport and where Merle packs up his bag of supplies.

Merle makes an uncommitted shrug, double checking that his Extreme Teen Bible is still in his bag and his war hammer is attached to his hip. The lines of laundry still hang over the deck, shirts and skirts billowing dangerously against the wind as they coast over the city. A few clothespin unsnap against the force, sending Stevie chasing after it with determination that’s quiet and frantic all at once. “Just go with it.”

Magnus makes a face. “Just go with it.”

“You know I can still see you.”

“You know I can still see you.”

“Stevie,” Merle says, snapping his fingers at her as if she’s a dog to order around. “Tell your father to stop being an ass.”

Stevie stands still in her spot, mouth opening and closing for a moment. “I—” One of Julia’s skirts flies off the line, and, whipping through the air before going overboard. “Fuck!” Stevie dashes to the side, swearing when she sees the skirt fall to the earth, getting caught in the top branches of a yellowing tree.

“Stevie,” Magnus warns. “Language.” He turns his attention back to his compass and map of Neverwinter, turning the ship so that they can fly over the merchant district. He doesn’t see how Stevie’s face burns. She stomps to the nearest wicker basket, drops the clothes inside with little fanfare, before storming to the door below deck.

Magnus makes one last turn at the wheel, then pulls a lever that stalls the ship in place. “Your move, Merle.”

Merle pulls on his red robe, pulls his back over his shoulder, then takes his bible in hand. “I’ll be back with Barry before you know it.”

Magnus double checks all the controls are in the right settings before scrambling down the stairs to the deck, just catching Merle right as he finishes preparing a round of feather fall. “Hey, so from one idiot to another—”

“Don’t put me in your category,” Merle says.

“But like, Cap’n Port is going to kill us when he finds out.”

Merle raises a finger. “If.”

Magnus nods. “Yeah. I like the sound of that. If.”

The dwarf hops a little, trying to reach the top of the rail. Without waiting for permission, Magnus places his hands on Merle’s butt and boosts him upwards. “Wait,” he says, already pushing Merle over the edge of the rail. He hears Merle scream every curse he knows in every language as he plummets downwards. “This isn’t an if situation—fuck!”