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#also the angst potential dont get me started
tulipsforvin · 21 hours
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OMGGGGGGG
I just remeber reading youre post about reader dying. The part with Louis hit HARD. While I can definitely see him and me as reader in that scenario, (dw I am fine– almost.LOL) I thought Albert would fit in this one soooo much better. (My opinion.... also Pre timeskip) OFCOURSE Louis fits in there GREATLY. AND I LOVE IT SOSOSOSOSO MUCH LIKE I LITERALLY CRIED BECAUSE IT WAS SO SAD AND BEAUTIFUL <333 ACTUALLY THANK YOU SOSOSO MUCH FOR SHOWING US ALL OF IT YOURE WRITING IS JUST– mhwa! <3 (⁠๑⁠♡⁠⌓⁠♡⁠๑⁠) (⁠ ⁠˘⁠ ⁠³⁠˘⁠)⁠♥ AND I KNOW YOU HEAR THIS A LOT RECENTLY BUT HONESTLY??? YOU DESERVE TO BECAUSE..... YOU..JUST!?!?! SO GOOD WRITING ???? Anyways– eghm... So what I was going to explain right now was how, you mentioned in one of youre post, Albert as a Boyfriend and that he wouldnt like someone who cant keep Hygiene. So I thought that, imagen, reader falling into depression (for whatever reason) and stopped keeping themself clean because of the lack of energy. They stopped showering, brushing theyre teeth etc.. and he started to feel grossed out by them. Not by choice ofcourse. He really doesnt want to feel that way, he loves them with his whole heart and soul. But he cant stand this anymore. He dont want to kiss them or sleep next to them in bed. So he tries to do the right thing and breaks up. He explains to them how he still loves them but cant stay with them any longer if they can't even brush their teeth . He doesnt want to hurt them much more and hopes that they can find help and get better. only to see them 2 days later lying in a cuddle of their own blood. He tries to crush to them, regretting every decision he has made earlier– just like Louis in that one hc. He doesnt want them to die. To think that theyre gross, annoying, stupid, useless, anything but beautiful and extremely Important. But hes too late. Youre already dead. Or so he thought. Just for the doctor to tell him that they had immense luck and that its almost a mirracle how you survived. He's relieved and his knees give way beneath him. This burden and the pressure on his shoulders falls away, almost in tears he asks the worried doctor kneeling next to him if he can see you. You're awake but you try to turn around when you see his face only to be follow by a huge pain in youre body as you tried. He obviosly doesnt care and rushes to youre side. He feels really guilty and apolegises to you. You dont care, you tell him to go away and add ' You left because you felt uncomfortable by the lack of my hygien. That was okay. But dont come back to me and say you care when that was the reason you first left me.' He accepts this and goes home at first. But eventully comes back with flowers while youre asleep. He wants to show you he really did care and peels you some appels. When he held you in his arms, unconscious and bleeing like a dove shot by hunters, he realised how much he could have done to help you. He could have talked, and or showered with you. But instead he just choose to not face it. He won't make this mistake again. Even If you will hate HIM for the Rest of youre life. He will show how much he loves you till get sick of it and just forgive him. He doesnt ever wanna let go of youre Hand anymore. He has experinced the feeling of youre abscence once, and he surely would never want to expierince this another time. Because he's confident that he wouldnt live that over.
Hahaha sorry that was loooong. I would like to hear youre opinion. I Hope you Liked it!! ♥️♥️
WAT THE HELL THIS IS SUCH A GOOD IDEA???
PLEASE DON'T EVEN FEEL REMOTELY WEIRD, BAD OR EMBARRASED ABOUT HOW LONG THIS IS BECAUSE THIS IS SO GOOD I'M GENUINELY SPEECHLESS. HOW IS THIS NOT A FIC YET?? THE POTENTIAL AND THE ANGST IT HAS WOWOOAOA
I can't even stop complimenting you honestly i absolutely love and am utterly and sincerely stunned at how you're able to incorporate two small things i said into creating this masterpiece of an idea??
believe me when i say i waited five minutes contemplating whether to even post this because i didn't want anyone to steal your idea. i'm being so for real right now if you don't want to turn this beautiful plot of an idea into writing yourself for some reason because if it was me i'd trademark this and stamp anything that states my ownership of a plot so delicious (since again, this is so good and has sm potential) then please, please let me at least attempt and and try giving this amazing, almost an artwork plot life someday. not sure if i would even do it justice bro damn but like you'll totally get the credits WOWOAOA. i can't even stop with the compliments because i'm genuinely baffled at how absolutely golden this idea is. god damn. LIKE OKAY SHAKESPEARE.
ANYWAY ARGH LMAOAOA don't mind me fanning over you and this.. i don't even have words left to describe just how good this plot/idea is but YEAH but this is genuinely so good. i'm somehow going back to babbling about how wonderful this is and i don't think I'll be able to stop if I don't end this here because holy shit the potential it carries is astounding and me personally, i love angst so this is.. FUCKKC I CAN'T STOP SAYING HOW GOOD THIS IS. LET ME END THIS HERE FOR REAL NOW — THANK YOU FOR YOUR WORDS + THE NEVERENDING SUPPORT LOL IM GRATEFUL YOU LIKE MY WRITING <33 I HOOE UOU HAVE THE BESY DAY OF UOUR LIFE
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geomimetry · 1 year
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I just discovered AL-AN and I? love? hes just so neat? girl help?
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drawlody · 16 days
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My list of Adam ships♡ n my opinion bout them (also fics rec :D)
Adam x Luicfer (Adamsapple/Duitarduck) 10/10
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Need i say more:)))??!?! started out as a "haha funny slip-up ship" to "hey they got really good angst potential". The friends/lovers to enemies to lovers is STRONG with this one n i am eating up everything i could found on ao3. Smth bout this macho-ass man finally getting to stay back n not take charge for once feel nice, also princess Adam supermacy wooooo. Whoever came up with the ship name i applaud u cause that's like a 3 layers name(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧
It's not an Adamsapple fic without Adam having at least 1 mental breakdown n Lucifer have his guilt eating him alive:)))
Very fucked up torture but i swear it worth the pain:D The dove is so dead it start to rot so plz read the tags properly (plz check out the AngeliaDark other works too they got good shit)
This one have a splits so check out both the fics (beware the author have a skrewed sense of what is considered wholesome:))))
I didnt think a smut scene could be this sad
Adam x Lute (Guitarspear/Guardrock) 10/10
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Litteraly my first Hazbin ship, assholes in love is an underrated dynamic we desperately need more off:))) That with a dash of evil dude x loyal subordinate (which i havent seen since the Deathglare days) n opposite attract (look they have one main thing in common is that their extreme bloodthirst, other than that she's stricter than ur mom n he's lazier than the Sloth ring itself but that the beauty of it no? He convince her to chill tf out n not to burst a blood vessel, she keep him on track n make sure Sera dont come on their asses)
They're just being silly enabling each other terrible behaviour n i love that for them (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) Litteral besties i tell ya
Heavy non-con shit involving Val but Lute will revenge our boi i promised u that
Cool idea n they r just made for each other damn
First hazbin fic i read which is a really cool smut:D
Adam x Micheal (we need a ship name people ) (update: it's Songbird/Guitarhero) 10/10
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I like how we dont even got a proper comfirmation of Micheal design/personality yet the ship is here already ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ( im using the Nakariiale's design as a base here love their design)
Hit me with that rebound love x "u look like my ex so im using u as a replacement but ill fall for the real u eventually" x co-workers in heaven. I'm thinking smth along the line of "after Lucifer fucked off with Lilith, Micheal became Adam guardian angel n they just hang out" ya feel me here? (✿◕‿◕✿)
Shout out to Bloog_b for dragging me into this ship:DDD also im on the Adam x the archangels ship as a "gotcha" to Lucifer of sort. Like bitch u stole my wives imma steal your brotherS
Look it's Adamsapple endgame but trust me u will be feed well on this ( u know how good u gotta be for people to ditch the main ship?)
I'm giving yall 4 fics here cause i can only found 4 rn(._. )
this one is uhh non-con so beware
Micheal is indeed Adam guardian angel in this one:D
Adam x Eve (Flowertunes) 8/10
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I dont care what yall said they love each other throughout Eden n Earth , might have a falling out in heaven but that doesnt change the fact that they were once IN LOVE. Honestly why cant we just have a couple that have the same bright-eyed innocence like one another.I refuse to believe Eve like willingly cheat on Adam with malicious intent n all, simply she was indeed ''tricked'' or just not fully understand the sistuation, n Adam love her way too much to think that she would do that to him like Lilith. Hell the dude was heartbroken after L left , starting the abandonment issues, so he would have cling to Eve, doing everything so that he aint alone again, even if that mean leaving Eden
Honestly it pisses me off that the Adam/Eve tag on ao3 most of the time is just 1 dialouge between them back when Eve bit the apple n thats it no elaboration on the couple whatsoever >:(((
Lots of switcharoos
sinner eve woooo
look its hard trynna find a fic focusing on them ok?
Adam x St. Peter (Guitargreeter (bet ya didnt see that coming:))) 7/10
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Base on this fanfic alone Joe my dude u r on the path of becoming THE Adam crack-ship writer n i am here for this:)))) just so u wait this dude gonna whip out a AdamxNifty , AdamxHusk fic later on ( •̀ ω •́ )✧
From within the fic itself the ship its 2 bros in love with homophobia standing in the way >:( also when did we have a name?!?!?!?
I just like Adam x anyone in heaven alright:D like bro famous n he got that ancient rizz, u telling mr he cant bag a hottie or 2-100+ hmm?
Adam x Alastor (Angelicradio) 8/10
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I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT ABOUT THEM THAT I SHIP I JUST DO φ(゜▽゜*)♪ i blame YOU honestly rn this ship is either Adam found Al after the fight n they make a deal or they're in heaven n they chillin this ship is confusing:D
They're angels on heaven
Adam gone back into eden n do shit differently
This is both Adam/Eve n Adam/Alastor kinda
Adam x Alastor x Lucifer (Angelicradioapple/ Charlie's dads (only me call them that lol)) 9/10
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''Hey Charlie u know how u r sad that your mother left? Wellllllll i got you 2 new dads suprise:DDDD''
Look 3 miserable men who hate each other + hell's greatest dad + my love for Dadam = Messy ass old men yaoi :DDDD n it work perfectly with Alastor Asexuality too!!! Like Adam n Lucifer could fuck each other brains out before Al joining in for the cuddles lol
Chaos ensue
Not exactly a love triangle but a love corner but hey we barely got food here :D
I cant believe how hot this shit is lol
Adam x Eve x Lilith x Lucifer (Eden poly/ applecore?) 8/10
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They could have been all married to each other(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ But as much as i go "OooOooo Poly yay'' i just cant vibe with EvexLucifer, like the cheating vibes is wayyyyyyyyy too much i just cant man . I mean with the interpetation that Lucifer came to Eden to hang out with the humans they all know eachother, they're a throuple yes but BUT when Eve came into the picture it was only with Adam n him only so the other 2 is ehhhh. Im fine with EvexLilith cause im seeing it happening later, not hidden from Adam while LuciferxEve got that deception going on .So uhhh in this ship they're more like bestie than lovers to me¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Also AdamxLilith is an underrated pairing like everytime i saw this applecore thing going on these 2 r at most tolerate each other like cmonnnnn we already twist this to hell n back, why cant we make it so their arguement was a petty non-malicious one n they still cares for each other hmm???
They're one happy family
IDK what to tell u bittersweet reunion n loving family is the only typa fic u get with this ship
Not that im complaining i need this wholesomeness
Adam x Mammon (Adammon/Madam/Greedyguitar/ 1st chirstmas.... hasnt had an offical name yet) 10/10
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They r litteraly same person different font idk what to tell u. More insults thrown around than Guitarspear but they're pretty similar. Adam is just " sinners suck ass but this dude is the worst in the best way". Also they're both big bois (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧ , they love towering over others
I'm sorry but there r barely BARELY
any fics of them :(
The art side is more plentiful tho :D
Adam x Angel Dust (Holydust/guitardust) 5/10
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THEY ARE BESTIES YOUR HONOUR n that the exact reason why i cant see them be together as a couple 100%, like the shit-talking bff vibes r wayyyy too strong XD Angel finally got someone who have the same vulgar humour as him n if Adam got married in hell Angel would 100% be his best bitch of honour (≧∀≦)ゞq(≧▽≦q)
They're best friends who have casual no-string attached sex that is ACTUALLY no-string attached:)))
I came to ship them due to those "What if they're co-workers under Val' scenarios ive been seeing on Tumblr
I got like 1 fic on ao3 i mean if u r looking for just platonic friendship between them then rest asure most Adam's redemption fics have that
I got 1 fic on tumblr
Adam x Charlie (Charadam/Guitarprincess) 5/10
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U know this ship give me a pretty bad first impression since a good chunk of the fics r either heavy non-con shit or lean wayyyyy to much into the daddy kink, ya know how Charlie got suppose daddy issues n all that jazz?:))) yeah that... that
But after seeing the art side of this ship im chillin with them now, since the art r pretty wholesome, usually having them decked out in punk-rock clothings hanging out. It's a big "Fuck you" to Lucifer n i live for these mf argueing ╰(*°▽°*)╯
So uhhh stay away from the fics if ya want an actual functional couple instead of wtv messed up shit we got there:))) But here's a fic anyway, the only one where it feel bearable n actual trynna go into said messed up relationship i already warn you
We got cracks like Guitarmaid (AdamxNifty), Valadam (AdamxVal) which i dont have enough materials to decied, Classicalrock (AdamxSera) sound interesting but also havent found anything , Guitarhalo (AdamxEmily) is an unexpected find, find i deem them to be more familial than romantic so we'll see if there's a fic good enough to convince me
Edit:i forgot to add Blitzo like Mammon already there why did i forgot
Adam x Blitzo (i dont think anyone even ship this but me:)) 7/10
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I cant find a single fic where they has anything more than a 1 nightstand n 1 interaction where they hit it off , i live off imagination alone (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) but like fr fr they would match so well, like their bloodlust n general jerkiness would make them the 3rd asshole x asshole ship on this list :DDDD
Tho as much as i wanna see them go further i feel like an on-n-off relationship/friends with benefits fit em more ya know ( *^-^)ρ(*╯^╰) If ya have any fic but the 2 here that have them interact lemme know cause a bitch need food :)
This is a lot of tag(._. )
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juyeonszn · 10 months
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SACRIFICE (EAT ME UP)
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PAIRING lee hyunjae x f!reader
WORD COUNT 9.17k
GENRES horror ﹒ smut ﹒ angst ﹒ fluff ig?
WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, mature language, mentions of murder, descriptions of crime scenes, mentions of blood, mentions of knifes, graphic description of stab wounds, mentions of potential mental illness, THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS THAT CONSTITUTE WARNINGS BUT ?!1?1 I DONT WANT TO SPOIL !1!2!2, Lots of Kissing, mutual masturbation (f! receiving fingering & m! receiving hand job), pillow talk ig, big dick hyunjae 😈, um unprotected sex lol be safe u silly geese, car sex, cowgirl position yeehaw, creampie, this entire fic is just a whole fucking roller coaster i stg it’s gonna haunt me forever
SUMMARY with a serial killer running rampant on campus, everyone around you seems to be dropping like flies. but, hey, at least you have hyunjae to protect you.
MORE omg.. my first written work for tbz 🙀 extra super fun fact; this was originally an idea i had for hyunjin from skz on my other blog that i actually started writing the week before halloween last year (the reason it’s a horror fic), but i never finished and sort of felt like there was no point in continuing it after a while— that is until i stumbled upon the draft a few weeks ago and decided to revamp, edit, and complete it 😋 i kept going back and rereading and then blanking when i wanted to add to it until last night when i said fuck it and drank two cups of coffee to power through the end 🙌 anyways.. here u all go, my baby that i never thought would see the light of day and my first time writing a genuine horror piece <3 also special shoutout to rina my soulmate @tsukidou for beta reading 🫶
PLAYLIST sacrifice (eat me up) — enhypen, awake — the boyz, roar — the boyz, fever — enhypen, fate — enhypen, taste — stray kids, wake up — ateez, white noise — pvris, heaven — pvris
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“Alright, that’s all for today’s lecture. If this was your last of the day, make sure to find someone to go home with and remember the curfew rules!” Your English professor says, concluding the class.
The students around you rush to pack up their things and get off of campus as soon as possible. You don’t seem to be in a hurry, though, taking your time to put away your notebook and laptop. Your roommates were still in their music production class, so you didn’t want to go home alone, deciding to wait until they were done.
“Y/N, don’t you wanna get home?” Professor Park asks, her voice echoing in the now empty lecture hall. She throws the strap of her bag over her shoulder and pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose.
“I do, but I have to wait for my roommates. They’re in a class right now and I’d rather not go by myself.” You let out an awkward laugh. She nods at your reasoning, giving you a small smile for comfort.
“Okay, you be careful! I’ll see you on Thursday.”
You raise your hand in a silent salutation, watching as she exits the room, leaving you completely alone. Though a public space, in a public building, the fact that there’s no one else nearby leaves you utterly unsettled. Your stomach churns with a twinge of fear and you start to feel a bit claustrophobic despite being in such a spacious area, so you choose this point to hurriedly collect your belongings and get the hell out of there.
The past couple of months have been in this weird state of limbo. You don’t recall exactly when the killings started, but once the police noticed a pattern, everyone knew sooner or later that the presence of a serial murderer would be announced on the local news. Your town enforced a citywide curfew to protect its citizens, but mostly the students at your university.
Every single one of the killer’s victims were university students. You were friends with a bunch of guys and while it was nice having big strong men surrounding you, you knew that could hardly do anything to quell the lingering anxiety you’ve felt ever since the spree began.
The police seemed to be having trouble coming up with any possible suspects, or even gaining any leads, thanks to the killer’s unusual victimology and the cool down time between murders always varying. If the people in charge of protecting you couldn’t do that, how were you supposed to feel safe?
In an attempt to get to the building where Jacob, Kevin, and Eric were as fast as you could, you speed walk out of the lecture hall, accidentally bumping into someone. You bow at a nearly ninety-degree angle and hurl out apology after apology following the collision, not trying to make any enemies in this day and time.
“Watch where you’re going, idiot.” The stranger spits, waiting for you to glance up at him to give you a nasty glare. He looks like the kind of guy who thought he was all that, despite peaking in high school. You feel your bottom lip quiver and you avoid eye contact.
“I—”
“Woah, dude, chill the fuck out. It was an accident, I’m sure she didn’t— wait, N/N, is that you? Hey it’s okay, don’t worry about it.”
There’s a familiar voice in your ears and a hand under your chin, forcing you to stand upright. Whoever you bumped into walks away with a scoff. You meet eyes with Lee Hyunjae, one of your dearest friends. He recognizes that hint of panic in your features and he frowns.
“I’m so sorry, Jae, I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going—” Your breath is caught in your throat and you fumble over your words.
“Hey, hey, slow down,” he keeps a hold on your biceps. “It’s alright, I promise. He’s gone. What’s wrong?”
You shut your eyes tightly, feeling pathetic for causing such a scene for no apparent reason. Hyunjae guides you through your breathing, his focus trained on you the whole time. He always made you feel so comfortable.
“With everything that’s been going on, I’m just so paranoid and afraid of being alone. I wanted to go to the music department building and wait for the boys.” You finally explain once you’ve calmed down and the rise of your chest is even.
“How about this? I’ll take you home so you don’t have to stay on campus any longer.” He suggests, bringing up a hand to tuck some hair behind your ear. You nod slowly, gathering your bearings.
Hyunjae leads you to his car that’s parked in the lot closest to the building you were just in and the two of you make your way to your apartment. You’d been friends with your roommates for years now, meeting in eighth grade. You had just moved schools and happened to be put into a class with Eric Sohn, the most rambunctious boy you’d ever met. He thought you seemed really sweet upon first impression and decided to befriend you, introducing you to all of his friends in turn.
Aside from Eric, there was Sangyeon, Jacob, Younghoon, Hyunjae, Juyeon, Kevin, Changmin, Chanhee, Haknyeon, and Sunwoo. While it was a little overwhelming, it was nice going from zero friends to eleven in the span of just a couple days. You were pretty close to all of them, but you and Hyunjae initially hit it off the best. You understood each other on a different level than everyone else and to this day, you still don't know the exact reason why.
Towards the end of high school, your friendship with Hyunjae transformed into something that wasn’t purely platonic. You weren’t entirely sure when it started to change, but your feelings for him grew exponentially. You tried to keep them to yourself, hidden from the world to preserve your fragile teenage heart. Though you’d already been friends with them a few years at that point, you still had that inkling of dread in the pit of your stomach that one day they’d choose to stop talking to you. You especially didn’t want a silly crush to be the cause of that.
After a while, however, the lines began to blur together anyway and everyone could tell you felt for him romantically. Once, Eric had made a comment about it being so painfully obvious that Hyunjae was just as into you and it nearly shook your whole world.
When college time rolled around, you all knew you’d be attending the same university, so picking roommates was a bit of a tricky situation. You chose yours solely based on the fact that you were majoring in similar things, so it’d be easy to fit schedules together. (You also couldn’t handle being roommates with Hyunjae; it’d be too much for your heart.) Hyunjae lived with Juyeon, Changmin, and Sunwoo, while Sangyeon, Younghoon, Chanhee, and Haknyeon lived together.
Hyunjae parks in a spot near the stairs that lead to your unit. The car is still running when you unbuckle your seatbelt and you stare at the steps blankly. Though the close proximity with him has your pulse racing, you want nothing more than some company until your roommates get home. You turn to him shyly, balling up a fistful of your sweater.
“Jae, do you— do you think you could stay with me for a bit before the boys come back? I don’t— I really don’t wanna be alone right now.”
The look he gives you is full of adoration, like you personally put the stars in the sky. He smiles softly and nods, reaching across the center console to place a comforting hand on top of yours. The two of you keep them intertwined as you go inside your apartment, locking all the locks carefully before sitting on your couch.
You don’t make a comment about him not letting go despite already being in the safety of your home. You don’t say anything about him pulling you into his side either, mostly because you want him to.
With all that’s been happening recently, you’ve felt so hollow. There was this indescribable emptiness expanding in you and even though you so desperately wanted to chalk it up to something else, you knew it was due to the fact that there was growing anxiety that you could be next, that any of your friends could be next. You were starting to move like you were in a simulation, doing everything in your daily routine without a single emotion. Sure, you’d laugh when Eric made a stupid joke but that’s about the most anyone could get from you aside from the occasional panic attack.
Hyunjae being here and holding you is exactly what you needed to feel some semblance of warmth again.
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There’s a soft knock on your bedroom door around eight that same night, waking you from your slumber. You don’t remember falling asleep or being moved to your bed, so you’re not too sure when Hyunjae left. You rub the sleep from your eyes as you get up to open your door.
“Hey, I didn’t mean to wake you, but we got some takeout if you’re hungry.” Jacob says with an apologetic smile, leaning on the door frame.
You give him a bleary look as you nod, following him into the dining room where your other two roommates were sitting at the table. Eric greets you through a full mouth. A small laugh escapes you when you sit across from him, Kevin adjacent to your seat. The sound of the TV in the living room plays as background noise as the four of you eat.
“So when’d you get home? I thought you were gonna wait for us.” Kevin asks.
“I was, but then I ran into Hyunjae when I was on my way to your building and he offered to bring me home,” you shrug, taking some tteokbokki with your chopsticks. “It was a whole thing, please don’t ask.”
Eric hums to himself, a mischievous grin on his face as he takes a sip of his cola. “Interesting. And you say he’s not into you…”
Heat blooms over your cheeks and you accidentally drop your chopsticks on your plate, their clacking against the ceramic garnering your roommates’ attention. Eric Sohn was now number one on your hit list. Kevin elbows him in the side and tells him to be quiet, despite the tiny upwards curve of his lips.
“If he cares about you as much as he seems like he does, he wouldn’t have left you here alone after you fell asleep,” Jacob mutters, looking at you from his peripherals. “What was the point of escorting you home if—”
“Jacob shut the fuck up,” Eric suddenly blurts, the three of you stare at him as he clambers over to the living room, turning up the volume on the TV. “Look!”
You turn in your chair, your stomach churning at the news report unfolding before you.
“We’re live just outside SNU, where another victim has been found. The body hasn’t been identified yet, but from what we do know, he was a student that attended the school,” the female reporter says into the microphone she’s holding, a glazed over expression in her eyes. “Crime Scene Investigators believe he was murdered at around six this evening, and was assumed to have been making his way home from campus. Updates are expected to come later tonight once we have more information.”
You know that far away, checked out gaze she had all too well. She’s reported on the killings for a while now, no doubt numb to the way things were at this point.
Your appetite spoils immediately and you excuse yourself from the table, making your way back to your room. You sit on your bed and bring your knees to your chest, taking a deep breath in, then covering your mouth when you breathe out to muffle the sob that follows. It was becoming too overwhelming for you and there was nothing you could do about it besides sit back and watch.
It was understandable for anyone in your situation to feel hopeless, how could they not? With someone terrorizing the city in an unpredictable manner, there was no sense of normalcy in anyone’s life. You shudder when you finally bring yourself to stop crying, digging your nails into the fat of your calves.
Through the walls, you can hear the boys talking, voices solemn.
“Why’d you have to put the TV louder, dumbass?”
“Sorry, I just like being up to date on the case, you know? I want to be prepared. What if I need to learn clone jutsu to take out the guy?”
“Eric, you’re such a clown, oh my god.”
“I get that you’re interested and all, but you have to be mindful of Y/N. You know how much this has affected her both emotionally and physically, she doesn’t need the constant reminder that it’s happening. And I’d appreciate if you apologized for telling me to ‘shut the fuck up’.”
There’s a snort in between.
“My bad, I didn’t mean to be rude about it. But while we’re on the topic, I think we both need to admit our mistakes. What you said about Hyunjae to her wasn’t cool either. I know we’re all friends, but it just came across too—”
“It was really snappy, Jacob. And a bit petty.”
“Yeah! What Kevin said.”
“I— you’re right. I just don’t want her getting hurt, in more ways than one.”
You don’t hear much else from the trio and sigh heavily, dragging your hands down your face and wiping your eyes with the heels of your palms. You grab your phone from your nightstand and hesitantly search for Hyunjae’s contact, the line ringing a couple times before he answers.
“Y/N? Is everything okay? Did something happen?”
“N-no, I’m fine. I was just— I wanted to check on you and make sure you were okay,” you mess with your bottom lip. “I heard there was another victim and I didn’t know when you left the apartment, so I just— uh— I just needed to know that you were safe. I called to see if you’d answer.”
You squeeze your eyes shut out of embarrassment, even if he can’t exactly see you. The stuttering was enough to make you go into hiding for the rest of your life if this serial killer didn’t.
“Oh,” you can hear the slight chuckle in his response from the way his breath hits the speaker. “It means a lot that you’d do that, N/N. Really, I appreciate you so much.”
Your lip finds itself between your teeth and your heart is pounding unbearably fast, you think you might be having a heart attack. You bring a hand up to clutch at your chest as a fuzzy feeling courses through your whole being.
Now you were scared for an entirely different reason.
(The main one occupies your mind again later that night when you scroll through your Twitter feed, only to find out the most recent victim was the guy you accidentally bumped into. You feel like some sick version of a guardian angel was looking after you. It makes it hard to fall asleep after that.)
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A couple days passed and you found yourself thinking about Lee Hyunjae more than usual.
Not to say that you didn’t already think about him at least once a day, but now it was worse. When you woke up, you wondered if he was still asleep. While you drank your morning coffee, you wondered if it’d taste sweeter had he made it for you. When you had lunch, you wondered if he’d like the spam musubi you made yourself. When you attended your other classes, you wondered which courses he was struggling with this semester.
As you were walking out of your English class, you recalled running into him. Had he not been there, you might’ve driven yourself insane trying to rush over to the music building while diffusing the issue with that stranger.
When you first began to harbor feelings for him, you assumed it would become nothing more than a silly schoolgirl crush. He was attractive and kind to you, but that was just the bare minimum— you thought you’d grow out of it. However, as time went on, what you thought was just puppy love had blossomed into something stronger. It was a force to be reckoned with.
Of course, all of that had been tossed on the back burner with everything that’s going on. Recently you’ve been too afraid for your own safety and well-being to over analyze your interactions with Hyunjae, but now you’re back to square one.
All because he’d done something nice for you.
God, the bar was so low. Was it really too much to ask for someone who was decent? Someone who wasn’t a serial killer?
You were on your way to the music building to wait for Jacob, Kevin, and Eric once again, when you see Hyunjae coming down the hall. He’s on his phone, not paying any mind to his surroundings. You’re about to call out to him when someone stops you, tugging on the sleeve of your sweater gently.
“Hey, Y/N right?” The tall boy asks, a charming smile on his face.
“Uh— yeah,” you nod, tucking some hair behind your ear. “Y-you are?”
“Oh my god! I’m so sorry! I must seem like a total weirdo,” he laughs, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “I’m Mingyu! We have English together.”
“Oh, you’re Mingyu? Professor Park told me about you before class today,” you give him a small comforting smile. “I don’t mind helping you!”
“Ah, that’s great to hear. I was a bit worried you’d be more annoyed about having to tutor someone so late in the semester.” Though he’s much taller than you and approached you first, Mingyu comes across as a little shy in nature. It puts you at ease in a way.
“No, not at all! English isn’t always the easiest, I get that. I wanna help as much as I can before finals. Look,” you pause, pulling your backpack off one shoulder to rip out a sheet of paper. “I’ll give you my number so we can arrange meet up dates! I’d prefer if we met at the library if that’s okay with you?”
Mingyu grins and sports a thumbs up in agreement. “That sounds perfect. Thank you so much, Y/N!”
You scribble your phone number onto the paper and hand it to him before parting ways. With the off guard conversation, you nearly forgot about Hyunjae, who was nowhere to be seen now. You feel your lips droop into a frown, since you were hoping you could talk with him for a second.
As you’re walking across the quad to the music building, a wind chill blows past you, making you wrap your arms around yourself. It was mid November and for some stupid reason, you were only wearing a small cardigan.
When you squint up at the sky, you also realize it’s more overcast than anything. There’s an angry grey cloud right above you and you curse yourself for not having an umbrella or a raincoat. You should've been more prepared, especially because of the inconsistent weather this time of year.
Suddenly, the sky is blocked from your view and you furrow your brows, spinning around. Hyunjae stares back at you with a smile ten times warmer than the frigid air surrounding you and a thicker jacket in one hand. The other holds up an umbrella just as tiny droplets begin to fall from above.
His timing couldn’t have been better.
“Heading to the music building?” He asks, skillfully placing the coat on your shoulders.
“Mhm… was gonna wait for the boys.” You respond, a little awestruck by how gorgeous he was. Especially up close. Your eyes fixate on the freckle on his nose rather than his own. He hums, keeping an arm around your shoulders as he leads you in a different direction.
“I can take you home again,” he glances down at you. “I don’t mind one bit.”
“O-okay!”
During the car ride to your apartment, you send a quick text to your roommates about not waiting up. You were happy that your relationship with Hyunjae was evolving. The past couple semesters had been rough, and you hadn’t seen him or any of the other guys nearly as much as Jacob, Kevin, and Eric. (And that was only because you lived with them.)
You toss your keys on to the mini table beside the front door, taking off your shoes with a small groan. The boots were cute, but not very comfortable. Hyunjae follows suit, his sock clad feet shuffling against the floor to sit on the couch.
After switching on the TV, you find a random Hallmark Christmas movie to play in the background, knowing full well that his presence beside you was too distracting. The brunette turns to face you, placing a hand on your thigh gently to get your attention.
“So, who was the dude you were talking to earlier?”
You blink at his question. So he saw you after all. Was he perhaps jealous? The idea shouldn’t make you giddy, but it does. “My professor asked me to tutor him ‘cause he’s struggling with English. Why?”
“Just curious. He seemed a little touchy.” Hyunjae plays with the hem of your sweater.
“O-oh. It’s fine, he wasn’t a random perv, if that’s what you were wondering.”
He scoots a little closer to you, tucking some hair behind your ear. You feel your face flush impossibly hotter. Your heart is racing and your breath is caught in your throat. His body heat radiates off of him with the new proximity.
“Good. It drives me crazy seeing other guys put their hands on you.” He admits bluntly, his hand resting at the junction where your neck meets your shoulder.
You know you look insane, your chest heaving up and down and your eyes widened a little. Like a baby deer caught by a predator. Who knew sweet sweet Hyunjae had a rather risqué side to him? You swallow thickly, not daring to move an inch. His thumb caresses your skin gently, goosebumps littering in its wake.
“Hyunjae…” You breathe, lips parting as you finally make eye contact with him.
“You’re so pretty, Y/N.”
You want to scream into the cushion behind you, your hands clamming up. Hyunjae looks like he could swallow you whole if he wanted to, his bottom lip between his teeth as he leans in a bit more. This moment was something straight out of one of your darkest fantasies. You never thought this would ever happen, that either of you would ever actually make a move on the other.
The sound of the front door unlocking catches both of your attention. Hyunjae pulls away from you faster than your brain can comprehend what exactly just occurred. Jacob is the first to walk in, laughing at something Eric said. The three males pause when they see you’re not alone.
The greetings are quick, Hyunjae dapping up the boys as if nothing. He’s also quick to say goodbye, ensuring them that he’ll make sure you’re safe when they’re not around. He gives you that smile of his, the one where his eyes form crescents, and then he’s gone.
You don’t know how much more of this you could take.
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“So, Y/N…” Eric starts in the middle of dinner, side eyeing you as he shovels rice into his mouth. “You and Hyunjae have been together an awful lot lately.”
Kevin snorts, kicking the blonde under the table. You suppose it was going to come up eventually. This ‘Will They, Won’t They’ back and forth shit was starting to tire you out. You weren’t getting any younger. Time was passing you up the longer you waited to just say something. And with all that’s been going on, it was silly to be afraid of admitting your feelings.
“He’s being a good friend, Eric,” Jacob sighs, reaching across to flick him on the forehead. “It’s actually really nice that he watches over Y/N when we’re gone.”
Eric grimaces, rubbing the spot that Jacob assaulted. You frown a bit when you realize that he had a point. Hyunjae was treating you like a child that had to be tended to, babysitting you like you weren’t capable of holding your own. Granted, both times he’s come over, you asked him to. So you couldn’t really blame him for assuming you wanted him around to protect you.
“Do y’all think Hyunjae actually likes me? In a non-platonic way?”
Kevin’s spoon clatters onto the floor and they all pause their banter to look at you. Every time your feelings for Hyunjae were brought up, you chose to ignore them and switch the subject. You can’t keep running away.
“Uh— yeah. Duh. Of course he does. I don’t know anyone else who would go out of their way to stay with someone they saw as just a friend multiple times a week so she felt safe.” Kevin finally answers after a moment.
“Okay.” You settle on, taking a sip of your water.
“What do you mean ‘okay’?” He raises an eyebrow at you, but you just shrug.
“That’s for me to know and you to find out.”
As you’re washing the dishes after dinner, you hear the news broadcast over the faucet. Another victim had just been found behind the campus library. The camera shows the scene behind the reporter, something that would’ve made you queasy a couple days ago, but now you feel nothing— just a dull ache in your chest. It’s messy, almost like the killer was in a hurry to get it over with.
The body is covered with a black tarp, paramedics wheeling it away in the corner of the screen. The reporter still wears that dissociated expression on her face as she goes over the details of this victim. She explains that because the murder was done so haphazardly, they were able to identify the body easily.
Twenty three year old Kim Mingyu, Sports Med Major.
The rest of the news report sounds like static in your ears as you scrub away at the dishes mindlessly. Your fingers have pruned and the water was burning the backs of your hands, but you don’t feel it, too checked out to care. It seemed like the killings were getting closer and closer to you. Part of you thought you’d be next every single time.
You had to tell Hyunjae how you felt. It was now or never.
Fifteen minutes later, he’s waiting outside of your apartment complex, leaning against his car. You take careful steps down the stairs, nearly fainting at the sight of him in a hoodie and grey sweatpants. He runs around the car to open the passenger door for you, only shutting it when you’re all buckled up. It’s not long after that he revs the engine and drives off to nowhere in particular, just like you requested. (Curfew ignored.)
It’s silent at first, save for the low hum of his music, R&B that resonates somewhere within your soul. You can’t help but steal a glance from your peripheral, fisting your sweatshirt when you see how concentrated he looks while driving. He has his right hand resting on the gear shift, the other gripping the wheel. You could’ve had this view all to yourself so long ago had you just spoken up.
“Hyunjae,” your voice is wobbly, but you steel yourself to continue. “I have something to tell you.”
“What is it?” He asks, keeping his eyes on the road.
“Do you think— uh— do you think you could pull over?” If you were going to confess, you wanted him to look at you. Besides, the drive was starting to make you jittery.
He nods and goes a bit further, before pulling into an empty lot. He shifts into park, unbuckling his seatbelt so he could turn his body towards you, giving you his undivided attention. You mirror him, tightening your hold on your sweater when he wets his lips, smiling at you. “Is this what you called me for?”
“Yeah, actually,” you force yourself to keep eye contact, pushing the lump back down your throat. “I’ve wanted to tell you this for years now, if I’m being honest with both of us.”
He chuckles, much like he did the other night over the phone. It drives you just a little crazy. “I’m listening.”
“I— I don’t know how to word this properly…” You wipe your palms on your legs. Come on, Y/N, spit it out already. “Fuck, okay, I like you Hyunjae. Like, really like you. In the way that I sometimes wish you would kiss me until I can’t breathe. I’ve been so afraid of admitting that to myself, but I’ve realized that life is way too short to dwell over the fear of rejection. But please, tell me you feel the same.”
He stares at you with an indecipherable look in his eyes. You feel like throwing up now, you stomach twisting and churning at the thought that you just ruined everything between you. There was no going back after this. He knew.
It’s as if months have passed by in utter silence with Hyunjae just sitting there, no words coming out of his mouth, until finally, he just leans across the center console, cupping your cheek with one of his hands. His vision is trained on your lips, his face close enough that his lashes flutter against your skin. God, he was even more gorgeous from this distance.
Instead of saying anything, he presses his lips to yours, a sweet but desperate kiss that melts away all the worries tucked into your head. They feel so soft on your own, molding together in near perfect timing. It’s like you’d been living for a year without rain and this kiss was the shower that saved you from a drought. It’s all you’ve ever wanted and needed and more.
“You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do that,” he breathes when he pulls away slightly. “The real thing is so much better than I imagined it would be.”
For once, time slows down in this moment, almost like the world stopped spinning on its axis. Everything slips from your mind and it’s just you and Hyunjae, here in his car in the middle of an empty parking lot. Nothing else matters. You smile at his confession, a genuine smile that was spurred on by contentment rather than force. You felt light and airy, no longer weighed down by such a trivial problem.
“I think I have an idea,” you giggle, reaching up to brush a stray hair from his face. “I’m not too sure, though, I could be wrong. Could you do that again to help jog my memory?”
Hyunjae laughs, (it’s the most melodic sound you’ve ever heard) but doesn’t hesitate to kiss you. You reciprocate his passion, tangling your fingers in his dark hair. He sighs into the kiss, pulling you on top of him. Your legs straddle his lap as best as they can and he reaches down to recline his seat, scooting it as far as it can go from the wheel. The thin material of your fleece shorts hardly hide the feeling of him under you, a low moan pushing into his mouth.
He nips at your bottom lip, tugging at it with his teeth gently before peppering kisses along your jaw and neck, sucking along the exposed skin from your sweatshirt. You whine, throwing your head back as his tongue soothes over the bruising area. His hands slide under your top, rubbing up and down your sides before moving them down to your thighs, repeating the action.
“You’re so gorgeous on top of me like this, Y/N.” Hyunjae says, just above a whisper like someone else might hear this intimate conversation. He grips your hips and bucks upwards to grind into your clothed core. Your eyes widen and you involuntarily moan at the sensation. This wasn’t what you were expecting when you planned to confess, but you didn’t hate the outcome. He grins at your response, reconnecting your mouths sloppily.
If you were given the choice, you were wholeheartedly satisfied with just this. You would’ve been plenty okay with just making out. Had you been asked years ago that you’d even get this far, you would’ve snorted in your own face, so why should you be greedy and want more than what you had? (That’s not to say that you didn’t.)
“H-Hyunjae,” you stutter, your brain foggy from all of the kissing you just did. “Do you…?”
You trail off, not sure how to word your question. You didn’t want to come off like a sex crazed maniac, but you didn’t want to come off like an amateur virgin either. Truth of the matter is, you were neither, but it had been a while since you indulged yourself in something of this sort. And this time it would be with Hyunjae, the one person you never thought you’d do this with. You were nervous.
All you wanted was to be entwined with him in more ways than one. You wanted all of him— the good, the bad, the ugly, the beautiful, the sick, the healthy. He could do no wrong on your eyes and you wanted to show him that.
“Do I…?” Hyunjae trails off, waiting for you to continue.
“Do you want to make love… with me?” This had to be the single most mortifying moment of your life. You cover your face in humiliation, shying away from him when he sits up on his elbows.
“What kind of question is that?” He asks with a chuckle, prying your hands from your face so he could look you in the eyes. “If I could make love to you every hour of the day, for seven days a week, I would. I want you all the time, Y/N. Earlier today, before we got interrupted, I wanted to do unimaginable things to you.”
You hide yourself in the crook of his neck, your skin flushing hotter. Weren't you wearing too many layers? The car was starting to feel stuffy. Hyunjae’s chest rumbles with laughter beneath you, pressing his lips to the shell of your ear. This is probably the gentlest he’d be with you all night, because from what you could infer, he was a manhandler.
“Take care of me,” you breathe, mouth brushing against his pulse point. “Please.”
Hyunjae stops holding himself back. He’d do whatever you asked of him, only hoping you’d be tied to him in every lifetime, just like this one. He kisses you again with an unrivaled fervor, slipping his hands inside your sweatshirt and touching you everywhere physically possible. They’re warm on your skin, palming your breasts over the flimsy fabric of your bralette.
He helps you get rid of your top and shorts, leaving you in just undergarments. The sight of you barely clothed sends him into a frenzy, especially knowing it’s for his eyes only. You aid Hyunjae in pulling off his hoodie and yanking his sweatpants down his long legs. The minute most of your restrictions are gone, Hyunjae brings you closer to him. He hisses at the contact, the warmth of your cunt through your panties putting him under a spell.
You whimper when his touch travels down your front, sneaking into the waistband of your underwear. The pads of his middle and ring fingers apply the lightest amount of pressure onto your clit the second he finds it, circling the sensitive bundle of nerves. Your nails on one hand dig into his shoulder while the other trails down his abdomen, rubbing up and down his length through his boxer briefs.
Hyunjae groans into your kiss and you gasp for air as you tear from him, resting your forehead on his to watch as you get each other off through your clothes. If earlier was something taken from one of your wet dreams, what did this constitute as? You clench around nothing when he pushes up into you, your wrists clashing. Knowing he was just as down bad for you as you were for him just made this all that much more real.
“I need to feel you around me,” he mumbles in your ear, dipping his fingers in and out of you languidly as if to explain what he meant. “Let me stretch you out.”
You nod in response, fumbling with his briefs. Hyunjae lifts his hips enough for you to help him out of them. You groan when he reveals his impressive size, wondering how exactly he expected you to take him. He pushes your panties to the side, mimicking the sound you just made when he sees your bare pussy drooling for him. You eventually get frustrated and line him up with your hole, sinking down in one fluid motion. A voluminous moan escapes from the back of your throat, his dick throbbing achingly inside of you. At first you stay still like that, your pelvises touching as you adjust to his length and girth.
“H-holy shit— you’re s-so deep, Jae,” you cry, resting your forehead against his yet again. He pecks your lips, holding onto your hips to help you bounce on his cock, practically impaling you every single time.
“Fuck, you’re taking me so well. Such a good fucking girl,” Hyunjae grunts, the warmth of your walls drawing him in even further. “So tight, too.”
Your thighs begin to burn and your movements become slower, which he takes note of instantaneously. He bends his knees and forces your upper half impossibly closer to him, thrusting up into you. This new angle allows him to find that one spongy spot that has you seeing stars, fogging up your brain and even your vision.
You cast a downward glance at the minimal space between where the two of you are connected. Your moans and whines grow louder with the view of every thrust of his hips into yours. Hyunjae sneaks his hand in the middle of you, his fingers expertly toying with your clit. Any more stimulation and the band in your stomach is snapping.
You’ve had sex before. You’ve slept with a handful of other guys in the past, but nothing could ever compare to this moment. Your cunt had already memorized his size and every vein, effectively ruining the chances of any other man doing this with you. Lee Hyunjae had you in a chokehold whether he realized it or not. He had you wrapped around his finger without really trying, but you could never complain.
Your walls squeeze his cock and he knows he won’t last much longer, shutting his eyes tightly. “C’mon baby, you gonna cum for me?”
“Mhm,” you whimper, your skin flush on his own. “Wanna cum so bad for you, Hyunjae.”
“Yeah? Me too, sweetheart,” he pants, the thumb on your hip pressing against the bone. “Where do you want me?”
“Inside,” you babble. “Please, please. I want you to cum inside me, Hyunjae.”
He kisses you softly just then, swallowing your pretty moans with something completely opposite of what he’s already given you, and that’s what sends you spiraling, fluttering around him. He groans, spilling into you and letting you milk him dry of everything he has to offer, painting your insides just like you asked him to.
You lay like that for a while, Hyunjae’s dick still buried in you to the hilt. Both of you attempt to catch your breaths and bring yourselves down from the well-anticipated euphoric state you just visited. You giggle at the condensation coating the windows of his car, extending your arm to draw a heart and a smiley face with your finger. He slowly pulls himself out, hissing at the sensitivity, but doesn’t make a move to get you off of his chest.
Where do you go from here? A line had just been crossed and you weren’t entirely sure you knew what he wanted from you. It’s one thing to imagine kissing and fucking someone extensively. But it was another to actually want a tangible, romantic relationship from them, to actually capacitate feelings for them.
“I love you,”
You jolt up and stare at him with widened eyes. Did those words really just come out of his mouth? As if he can read your mind, he nods. There’s a dragged out sigh, followed by him sitting up slightly with you perched on his lap.
“I really do, Y/N. I’ve felt this way for years and I’m willing to do anything for you.” He admits, tucking some of your hair behind your ear. You kiss him gently, the pad of your thumb swiping across his cheekbone.
“I love you, too.”
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The Saturday after your night in Hyunjae’s car brought everything into perspective for you.
You hadn’t spoken to him since he dropped you off at your apartment and it was beginning to worry you. Even though you made sure he reciprocated your emotions, there still could’ve been a misunderstanding. Had you been too forward? Did you scare him away? Did something happen to him? Whatever the explanation was, you didn’t like the eerie feeling it started brewing in your stomach— it was foreboding.
In spite of not talking to them at all in what seemed to be a month or so, you tried calling each of your mutual friends to see if you could get some answers. Not even his roommates picked up their phones and this made you much more uneasy. You pace back and forth in your living room, nicking at your bottom lip with your nails. Why did he choose now of all times to ghost you? What went wrong?
Kevin comes out of his bedroom a couple minutes later, expecting to grab his morning coffee as usual. When he finds you nearly on the brink of insanity instead, he decides to intervene. He supposed his caffeine could wait until his best friend was calmed down. You jump in surprise, holding a fist to your chest. He raises his hands in mock surrender.
“Didn’t mean to startle you, my bad. What’s up? Why do you look like you’re going through a quarter life crisis?” Kevin asks you, pushing his glasses up his nose. “Is everything okay?”
“I—“ you pause and take a deep breath. “I don’t know…”
His eyebrows furrow and he guides you to the sofa so you could sit down. “What do you mean ‘you don’t know’?”
“Hyunjae hasn’t talked to me since Thursday night, after he brought me back here,” your voice is hoarser than you’d like it to be. “I-I texted and called him a bunch but he hasn’t replied. I even— I even tried Juyo, Sunwoo, and Changmin. No luck with them either. I’m concerned, Kev.”
Kevin combs through his hair, pursing his lips in thought. “Yeah, okay, I would be too. It's a little weird that none of them are responding. Have you thought of just showing up at his place to check in on him?”
You shake your head. “No, I didn’t want him to think I’m clingy and annoying in case he was there. What if he just wants to get me off of his back and he’s telling them to ignore me?”
“I don’t think that’s the case at all, Y/N,” your friend sighs, putting his glasses on top of his head and running a hand down his face. “Hyunjae has never been that kind of person in all the years we’ve known him. I highly doubt he’d switch up now. Plus, he’s literally crazy about you. I’m pretty sure the guy would move heaven and earth for you if he could. I think there’s a very real and genuine possibility that something is seriously wrong. It’s like— it’s just a gut feeling, you know?”
“Yeah, I know.” If Kevin felt this way, too, that would only mean one thing, right? You had to get to the bottom of this. There was a chance that lives depended on it. A quick roll of your neck and you’re standing. “I’m gonna go over there. I can’t leave things unanswered. I can’t wait for a fucking news report.”
The ravenette pats the top of your head. “Be careful, N/N. Please.”
You give him a nod before you’re slipping into your shoes and grabbing his car keys. You’re not exactly dressed for a confrontation if there is one— clad in a pair of sweatpants, an oversized sweatshirt with your university’s crest on it, and socks with sandals— but you were too preoccupied to care.
The drive itself was mentally taxing, your brain dissociating most of the ride. You’re not sure how many of the lights you passed were actually green. The closer you got to Hyunjae’s apartment, the more that trepidation settling in your lower abdomen grew. Throughout your life, you’d never been the type of person who acted on instinct or had a nagging voice in the rear of your head warning you about situations you got into. You usually went with the flow and if you made a mistake, you allowed yourself to learn from it.
However, that was prior to being thrown into a period of uncertainty like this one. Now, all you could do was act on instinct. All you could do was listen to the stupid nagging voice in the rear of your head yelling at you. All you could do was follow the blaring alarms and caution signs in your field of vision. And this time they were almost deafening.
Kevin’s car rolls to a stop outside of Hyunjae’s building, occupying an empty spot three away from the front of the stairs. Your pulse races when you step out of the vehicle and immediately recognize the cars in the spaces beside yours. Hyunjae’s, Juyeon’s, and Changmin’s. You notice a thin layer of dirt caking Juyeon and Changmin’s, as if they’d remained unmoved for a long time. Perturbed wasn’t a big enough word to describe what was going through your mind.
Half of you was terrified to take a step towards the stairs, let alone ascend them to Hyunjae’s floor. What would go down when you reached his apartment? What would happen the moment that door opened?
You ball your hands into fists, the edges of your nails jabbing the skin of your palms. The pain steels you enough to move forward, walking up the stairs slowly. There’s a chill tiptoeing along your spine the whole trip up, like your body knew what you were getting yourself into before you did. Maybe you were stupid. Only an idiot would lead themselves blindly into a scenario without knowing the outcome.
It’s been minutes of you staring at the slightly rusted numbers on Hyunjae’s door before you register that you’re standing in front of it. If you're being honest, you have no idea what you’re doing. You were acting on autopilot— progressing without a thought of what’s coming next. A shuddered breath leaves your lips and you raise your knuckles to the door.
The first knock is too soft to hear if the inhabitants were in their bedrooms, so you apply more force the second time. The sound reverberates through the hall, a wince appearing on your features. If someone was inside, surely they had to have heard that one. You wait a little longer for the door to swing open and reveal one of your friends looking perfectly fine. For Juyeon to showcase that grin of his that reaches his eyes and ask what you were doing here. For Changmin to give you that sweet smile that puffed up his cheeks and ask what you needed. For Sunwoo to blow a raspberry before he laughed at how silly you were for stressing over them. For Hyunjae to reassure you that it was all going to be okay, that he loved you. You were praying for that.
But no one showed up on the other end of that doorway and you were stuck glaring at that same painted board of wood.
That’s what sends your instincts into overdrive. Your hand grabs the knob, twisting it just in case. It makes a full rotation, pushing open the door the tiniest bit. You peek inside carefully and find all the lights in the living room and kitchen off. Your teeth bite down on your lip as you enter the apartment. One of the things you hated about it, was the annoying buzz of the fluorescent lights in their bathroom. And for some reason, that was all that infiltrated your ears.
The door for said bathroom was cracked just a tad at the end of the hallway, but what caught your attention was the room closest to you— also cracked the most miniscule amount. You see light filtering through, an almost orange glow like that of a desk lamp. Your stupidity would be your downfall, you conclude, your feet gravitating to the room. It’s Hyunjae’s you recall when you’re outside of it. They always say curiosity killed the cat, and you couldn’t help but revert to a feline and nudge it open with your foot.
You really wished that saying was just that— a saying.
Eric sits ahead of you, tied to a chair in the middle of the room. There’s a piece of fabric gagging his mouth and his clothes are tattered, blood staining nearly every inch. A long gash runs along his left bicep and a myriad of smaller cuts litter his face and arms. What your focus lands on first are the several deep stab wounds on his thighs.
A hand comes up to cup your mouth to keep yourself from screaming at the sight of your best friend in this position. He struggles against his restraints, muffled cries for your assistance shattering your heart into a thousand pieces like broken shards of glass. Tear streaks mixed with dried blood cover the apples of his cheeks.
“Oh my god, Eric,” your voice wobbles as you scramble to free him. “Oh my god…”
You pull down the fabric in his mouth first and he gasps for air. His eyes widen at something behind you and he warns, “Y/N—!” before he’s interrupted by your yelp. The person pressed into your back has their arm around your neck with a hold tight enough that you can’t escape, but loose enough that you can breathe, the blunt edge of a knife grazing the column of your throat.
“Tsk tsk, Youngjae. You should know that making so much noise when your killer’s not in the room just alerts them of suspicious activity. That’s survival 101, my friend. Isn’t that right, sweet sweet Y/N?”
No.
No. No. No. No. No.
This wasn’t happening.
This couldn’t be happening.
“Please, let her go, Hyunjae.” Eric begs. Hyunjae hums, nuzzling his nose in your hair. He rolls his eyes and scoffs after inhaling your scent, resting his chin on your shoulder.
“God, you’re a mouthy one. Not even Juyeon and Sunwoo were this chatty when I slit their throats— then again, it's not like they could talk much anyway.” He snorts.
You felt sick. You were lightheaded now, just at the thought of your friends gone. “W-why are you doing this?”
Hyunjae grumbles, pouting his lips. “Time for me to unravel my evil villain monologue, huh?” He slips a hand under your sweatshirt and pinches the side of your waist. “Well here it is; what you’re dying to know. The first incident was by complete accident, we were simply having a discussion about why he shouldn’t have been staring at your ass while his girlfriend was next to him at Jeong Jaehyun’s end of summer bonfire. The dude got pissed off that I called him out and tried to start a fight, but I shoved him so hard, he fell and hit his head on a rock. I just couldn’t find it in myself to feel bad about it so I left him there like nothing. From then on, anyone who came between us or remotely hurt you in any way wound up on the receiving end of this knife. Funny isn’t it? How you’re the one beneath it this time?”
It all began to fall into place once he laid the cards out on the table for you to read. The guy you ran into Tuesday after class. Poor Kim Mingyu, who just wanted to pass his English final. Your friends not picking up their phones. And supposedly it was all in the name of love.
“Y-you did that for me?”
“Of course, baby,” Hyunjae mutters into the shell of your ear. “I said I’d protect you didn’t I? I just want you all to myself.”
“What the fuck does that possessive bullshit have to do with me? What did it have to do with Juyo or Changmin or Sunwoo?” Eric cries. “Oh god, what about—?”
“Sangyeon, Hoon, Chanhee, Hak? Yeah, those four were taken care of way before my own roommates. You, obviously, were the chosen one this go around. Then it would be Kevin and lastly, Jacob. I planned on stopping after you three unless absolutely necessary.”
“How is any of this fucking necessary? You’re psychotic,” the blonde exclaims, still wriggling in his restraints. “Why would Y/N want you after all of this? Did you really believe she’d never find out about what you’ve done?”
Hyunjae glides the smooth edge of the blade against your skin and releases you from his grip, but takes a hold of your wrist, placing the handle in your grasp. He urges you forward, closer to Eric. “If she was scared of me, don’t you think she would’ve tried harder to escape me? Didn’t even blink when I held the knife to her neck.”
The brunette kisses your temple and you watch the fear in Eric’s eyes morph into defeat. “After everything we’ve been through? I’ve known you since eighth grade, Y/N. Eighth fucking grade. And this is how it ends?”
“H-he loves me,” you stutter, glancing at Hyunjae. “Don’t you?”
“You don’t kill your best friends out of love, Y/N! He’s insane! Please, don’t let him get into your head. You’re not that kind of person.” Eric attempts to reason.
Maybe you weren’t. Maybe you were. Who knows? That didn’t matter. What mattered was the fact that Hyunjae loved you. He loved you so much that he’d kill for you. Over and over and over again.
It was kind of comical that you loved him all the same. You, too, would kill for him. Over and over and over again.
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© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.
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beelzebubsis · 5 months
Text
something i'll never be able to get over with the bbh and dapper relationship is what dapper wrote in the laboratory journal:
"But if I am a sun for him, aren't stars suppose to burn either way?"
because only dapper could take bbh's incredibly sincere and loving phrase of endearment and see the negative connotations of it, not out of distrust or resentment but rather pure logical reason. that yeah the sun is a star and stars do burn and don't truly last forever (don't get me started on the fact that bbh is canonically immortal so there's another level of angst regarding dapper fearing not living as long as his dad). that this phrase capsulate the initial feelings that all the parents had towards the eggs. because at first all the parents really did see the eggs as a means to a end, that they were the latest task / challenge presented by the island. and its not like they weren't vocal about that fact to the eggs, they explicitly asked the eggs and bragged to them about raising them the best and talking about the "prize" for raising them.
i feel like dappers the only egg that's really touched on the fact that the eggs weren't really suppose to last. that he isn't afraid of death but rather his fathers reaction to it, because it was the parents attachment to the eggs that has kept them around. dapper has always been very transparent with his mortality and potential death but i feel like this quote is the first time his character has actually touched on dapper's feeling about dying. i think another level of this quote is also the connotations of "burn" because its really makes me think of the parents interest in the eggs "burning" away (burnout) because of all the parents bbh has been the one to log on everyday and care for both him and the other eggs. and its questioning when is his father investment in him going to burn away too, because its the parents attachment that kept them around but how long can the parents remain attached.
i dont know. i absolutely adore this quote. its just got some many levels and connotations and its adds so much depth to dapper's character. i love the server lore and etc but i wish we got more from the dapper secret labortory arc because it was such a interesting arc for dapper character. anyway this quote is my roman empire.
if you've got any other interpretations of the quote i'd love to hear them.
this tik tok is also good
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sugar-omi · 2 months
Note
good lord I was trying to study but out of nowhere I know where🩸this came into my mind:
having a night in at ur grown up house w cove derek and baxter (only dating cove) and everyone gets wasted asf so they sleep over and late at night the other two can hear u and cove in ur bedroom 👀 ykwim?
the smut and angst potential of them getting off to listening to u two from their respective guest rooms and the irony of both ur guests doing it omggggggg 🫣
in the morning neither of them can properly look at u two out of shame and u and cove r just embarrassed cause u think it’s just cause they heard u (and ofc ur only half right)
these ideas fr come to me at the worst time lol
-🗑️
I AM SCREAMING. YOU'RE SO BRILLIANT I CAN'T.... derek would really try not to, but i feel like it'd end up seeping into his dreams and he just can't resist. and baxterrrr omg... he'd be so embarrassed n ashamed, i dont think he'd be able to sleep the rest of the night at all, even once you n cove are done... pls you sent this at the perfect time bc i was about to start writing n i cannot focus until i write this now, i must have this in a fic.. n ik it isn't what you're talking about, but this is also so good n i instantly thought abt this scenario. i will take ANY chance for derek n baxter to fall in love or into bed LOL
tags : NSFW, baxter x derek, one night stand (UNLESS), you and cove drink, auralism*, oral (derek receiving), top/dom baxter, bottom derek, derek has a crush on you/MC, baxter has a thing for both of you or maybe he's just a kinky bastard
*to be aroused by sound. (can be compared with voyeurism)
synopsis : baxter and derek are staying with you for an extended vacation (much needed for both of them.) and while you two have been considerate and lovely hosts, you're a bit loud... not that it's a problem. quite the opposite actually..
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imagine baxter is pouring himself a glass of wine, unable to get your and cove's muffled moans out of his head.
he's generous with his pouring, since everyone already had a lot to drink during dinner, being reserved is unnecessary.
baxter tips back his cup, licking his lips, savoring the sweet taste of this wine, humming at the taste. not bad..
he's checking the label, wanting to remember the brand so he can add it to his shelves at home.
"oh."
baxter looks up, tired eyes wide at the sudden guest. he's met with derek's wide eyes, equally tired..
baxter gives a lopsided smile, trying to be friendly with his new friend. he gestures to the barstools across from him, "care to join me?"
derek rubs his neck shyly, "ah, i wouldn't want to impose. i just came for some water.."
baxter shakes his head, leaning back on the island, taking a sip of his wine. if he knew he'd have company, he wouldn't have poured so much at once.
he licks his lips, trying not to eye his glass to see if it looks like an reasonable amount of wine. trying to preserve his put together image is fruitless anyway, baxter is a hot mess walking and you could probably smell his issues all the way from france.
"nonsense, i wouldn't mind company. the best conversations are best shared under the stars, i'd say. although, i won't blame if you're going bak to bed." baxter laughs to himself humorlessly. "probably a better idea than getting drunk again."
derek laughs, "well, if you don't mind the company then.." and goes about grabbing some water before sitting across from baxter, trying to be quiet when he drags out the barstool.
there's a stretch of silence between them, the two of them sipping their drinks and baxter plays off his awkwardness by admiring the photo collage in the hallway, visible through the wide doorway.
baxter turns back to derek, who's holding his water with both hands, dozily looking into the glass. he looks up and is surprised to meet baxter's sharp gaze, but plays it off with a smile.
baxter speaks lazily, his movements languished and his bones heavy. he's feeling warm from the wine, and a bit chatty. "couldn't sleep either, huh?"
derek laughs, "that obvious?"
baxter shrugs, speaking around the lip of his wineglass. "i figured we're in the same boat."
derek stills, his cheeks slowly filling red, and he looks up, trying to figure out if he's trying to say he also heard you and cove doing... it. the other night.
baxter bounces his eyebrows, and that makes derek flush brightly, looking down. "y-yeah, i guess we are.."
he laughs, covering his mouth to muffle the noise.
derek seems to relax a bit at his amusement, and eventually they relax a bit more, and baxter goes on to tell derek more of his wedding horror stories when he asks.
they're laughing, trying to muffle the sound with their hands when they get too loud, and baxter is leaned over the counter, rambling to derek as softly as possible.
baxter signs and shakes his head, a smile still on his lips as he takes another sip. he's definitely getting buzzed again.
and at some point baxter even sits next to him and derek seems to greatly enjoy baxter's open laughter and his wide gestures as he narrates his stories, even throwing up his own chaotic stories about what it was like growing up with his brothers.
"hey.." derek calls, and baxter hums curiously in response. "does that taste good?"
baxter raises his brow but tips his glass towards derek. "it is. it has notes of peach and honey... wanna try?"
derek glances between baxter's eyes and the wine, nodding, taking the glass from his hands and taking a long sip...
baxter's eyes are stuck on derek's lips, his eyes following how his throat bobs when he swallows and his tongue dashes out to lick the wine running down the corner of his lips..
baxter snaps his eyes back towards derek's, who's already looking back at him.
the silence seems long, and the distance between derek and baxter's lips seems even longer, and he feels antsy even though they're both leaning in, their lips meeting in the middle in a soft kiss.
derek deepens the kiss, leaning into baxter, and humming into the kiss when baxter starts rubbing his thigh, his fingers sliding down th fabric of his sweatpants until he's touching his inner thigh, dangerously close to his bulge..
a moan echoes, and baxter and derek break apart, panting and their lips wet and swollen. then they hear it again, and some muffled talking.
they look into each others eyes, unable to move. they're both wide awake now, both because of that hot kiss and the sounds of cove's deep, and futile muffled moans.
their chests rise and fall, tension in the air, mingling with something else...
derek speaks first, taking baxter's hand before he can pull away. "do you... should we go to your room?"
baxter blinks owlishly, shocked and flustered. but really fucking turned on.
"yes, yeah, yeah okay.." he stumbles his words, totally knocked off his feet by the way derek looks at him, his green eyes deep with lust, and the whole turn of events.
derek leads him down the hall, and baxter is grateful he didn't somehow knock over the barstool or the flower vase in the hall.
they walk past your shared bedroom, baxter's designated room for his stay, at the end of the hall.
baxter tries to ignore the way his cock throb when he hears cove curse and growl, "fuck, you're so warm..." he tries not to think about it, but the idea of what you two are getting up to, how you both look and sound, what you're doing to each other...
he's trying not to let his mind run away with him but he's admittedly, a weak man. and so is derek, if the way he clutches his hand tighter and all but shoves baxter through the door and closes the door a bit louder than he should.
you and cove always drown out all other forms of life when you're together, and baxter doubts it's much different in the bedroom, if not "worse."
derek pushes baxter to sit on the bed, standing over him, his legs on either side of baxter's lap and he pulls off his shirt, throwing it on the floor.
baxter licks his lips, his hands sliding up derek's waist and stomach, his body thick and toned with muscles... "goddamn..." baxter exhales, all but drooling at the sight.
derek laughs shyly, lifting his arm to rub his neck (a nervous tick baxter has come to realize) and the muscles in his arm stretches and flex. baxter has a distant thought about derek being able to manhandle him...
"is this okay?" derek asks, suddenly shy now.
baxter nods, leaning in to kiss along derek's bronze stomach, his lips trailing down his happy trail to his bulge. "more than okay.."
baxter tugs on derek's sweatpants, looking up at him. "let me know if you want to stop..."
he tugs down derek's pants and underwear, letting his cock spring free. baxter strokes his cock to full mast, and derek holds onto baxter's hand for support, his other hand coming up to muffle his moan.
baxter wraps his lips around derek's flushed tip, sucking and circling his tongue over the head.
"b-baxter..." derek gasps, his thighs shaking.
baxter takes him deeper down his throat, keeping eye contact as he swallows around his cock, reaching down to palm his own bulge through his satin pajamas.
he groans, the vibrations sending shivers up derek's spine and derek mumbles, his fingers finding their way to baxter's hair, clinging onto the already messy locks.
baxter tears his hand away from his hard-on, to undo the buttons on his pajama shirt, the buttons slipping through his fingers until his shirt is wide open.
"mhm-!" baxter startles, gripping onto derek's thighs, his hips bucking up into his warm mouth.
derek moans shakily, "oh f- i'm sorry. sorry.." he babbles, pushing back baxter's fringe, his thighs twitching and his muscles clenching under baxter's hands.
baxter hums around derek's length, patting his thigh. his tongue drags along the underside of his cock, baxter's lips pulling off him with a pop, his lips wet and puffy.
baxter's sharp, lustful eyes meeting derek's equally horny gaze. derek's flushed cheeks are a feast for baxter's eyes, he can't wait to have him in bed..
"do you.. wanna go further?" baxter asks, his hand making obscene wet noises from all the pre-cum and spit, as he strokes derek's cock in his fist.
derek nods, his throat bobbing as he tries not to fall to his knees or cry out and alert you and cove to what they're doing in here.. "yes, please.."
baxter pulls away, standing up to tug off the rest of his clothes while derek tugs off his pants, almost tripping when the leg gets stuck on his ankle but baxter ignores it since he's not very elegant either, the wine still buzzing through him.
he throws his clothes on the floor, all but throwing himself into the bed with derek, straddling his lap as he captures his lips in a kiss, his tongue slipping past derek's lips, guiding his tongue to move with his own.
derek grips baxter's waist, his hands pulling him down to grind him into his lap, their cocks sliding together.
baxter breaks the kiss, his lips falling to derek's neck...
"cove- cove- cove!" your cry is heard through the wall, followed by muffled moans and whimpers.
"ah!" derek moans, his fingrs digging into the plush of baxter's hips when he bites down on his neck.
"oh- sorry. did i hurt you?" he worries, kissing the area soothingly. he didn't expect you to.. cry out so loudly. not that you aren't allowed to be loud in your own home, or anything like that. he just didn't think you'd sound so hot.
he's trying not to think about if he wishes it was his name on your lips, or what cove is doing to make you call his name so loudly and lewdly...
derek shakes his head, or tries too with baxter under his chin. "i mean, it hurt but.. it wasn't bad..." derek admits shyly.
baxter smiles, pulling off his neck to kiss his lips again, smiling too much to kiss properly but they have all night for that anyway...
he leans over the edge of the bed for his bag, fumbling through the open inner pocket for a condom and lube.
it's not that baxter planned to get laid on this trip, it's just bad to be unprepared.
"do you want to be on top?" baxter inquires, pointing the condom at derek.
he flushes, licking his lips and glancing off to the side. "um.. if you don't mind, you can be on top..."
baxter raises his brows, a blush high on his cheeks.
ohh derek really is interesting.
"not at all." baxter purrs, fixing their position so one of derek's legs is on his shoulder, and the other over his thigh.
he slowly sinks one, then two, then three digits into derek's hole, scissoring his fingers and rubbing derek's thigh soothingly. he's such a mess just from his fingers alone, derek's face half buried in the pillow and his hips bucking up and his thighs shaking.
"that's-" derek pants, swallowing thickly. "that's enough... put it in.. please..." he gasps, peeking at baxter through his lashes.
"fuck..." baxter curses, his stomach dipping with lust.
he fumbles, trying to open the condom but his fingers are covered in lube and he ends up ripping it with his teeth impatiently. baxter rolls it over his length, leaning over to pull derek into a kiss as he sinks into him.
"hmmn!" derek mewls into the kiss, his arms coming to lock around baxter's neck.
baxter slams his hips into derek, a loud slap sounding through the room from baxter's hips meeting his ass. baxter breaks the kiss, hissing.
that was definitely too loud, but it's also been so long since he's been with someone, and derek is so charming, that he's not sure he cares..
derek moans, trying to stifle it by biting his lips.
they pant, letting derek adjust to his length and for them to catch their breath, baxter feels like the air has been knocked out of him with how derek's hot walls are wrapped around him, his hole clenching and flutter around him, trying to take him deeper.
"mn, y/n-" cove voice is muffled, keeping them from hearing the rest of his sentence. although it was probably cut short, if the deep groan they hear through the wall is anything to go by.
baxter pants, "i'm.. i'mma start moving..." he gasps, moving so he's sitting up again, his hand pushing derek's knee up towards his chest.
derek covers his mouth with his hand, baxter's cock dragging so slowly against his walls, his eyes rolling and fluttering shut when his tip bumps against a sensitive spot in his walls, dangerously close to his prostate..
"harder!- ha- oh fuck!" you curse and moan unabashedly loud, followed by your bed frame thumping against the wall.
it quiets down to some creaking, with dull thumps every now and then.
baxter picks up the pace of his thrusts, spurred on by all your sounds from the other room and derek's lewd expressions.
derek whimpers, his moans and cries barely muffled by his hand and when baxter's hips slam into his repeatedly, he can't hold onto his barrage of moans and whines, babbling nonsense.
baxter leans over him, forcing his legs against his chest so he can whisper in derek's ear, stuffing his fingers down derek's throat, his middle and ring fingers pressing on his tongue.
"shh, darling. they'll hear us..." baxter purrs, although he laughs and nods his head to the side, "although, i think being quiet is a bit useless for all of us at this point."
derek whimpers around baxter's fingers, drool pooling in his mouth. he closes his lips around the digits and sucks, swallowing, dragging his tongue along baxter's fingers seductively..
"god." baxter grunts, his face scrunching up in pleasure.
his hips thrust up into derek's g-spot, his thrusts shallow as they both get closer and closer to finishing.
baxter pulls his fingers from derek's lips, a string of spit connecting derek's lips to the digits before it breaks, his hand slipping between their bodies to stroke derek's weeping cock, pre-cum pooling along the valley of his abs...
baxter captures derek in a sloppy kiss, neither of them really trying to hold back their sounds anymore. and from the sounds of it, you and cove aren't worried about being quiet either, your moans more frequent and totally unrestrained.
"i'm gonna-" derek pants, his nails dragging down baxter's shoulder.
"go ahead. cum. cum for me." baxter growls, his hand abusing derek's sensitive tip, making short strokes.
derek's legs shake on either side of him, his eyes rolling as he cums into baxter's hand. baxter groans, his hips stuttering as derek clenched around him, filling the condom.
they melt into each other, their chests rising and falling, and their heavy breathing match.
baxter turns his head to the side, seeing the sky turn from night to early morning..
"i'll.." he pants, pushing himself off derek's chest. "i'll run a bath... wanna join me?"
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stwritings · 1 year
Text
I've Got You
Synopsis
Eddie helps reader through a bad trip after she's pressured by her boyfriend to take drugs.
What To Expect/Warnings
This is a rather heavy topic and potentially triggering to some so please proceed with caution. ♡
This fic takes place in 87 and has no mention of the plot from Season 4, apart from Eddie graduating. Also was not expecting it to be this long lmfao, woops. No use of y/n, toxic relationship, drug use, peer pressuring, bad drug trip, anxiety, hurt/comfort, confrontation between Eddie and reader's bf, angst, mutual pining, emotional cheating if you squint??, descriptions of drug side effects, alcohol consumption.
Let me know if i missed anything.
(proofread in a very sleepy state lol, dont mind potential spelling mistakes of repetitive words/phrasings)
Once again, i can't stress this enough, please do not read this fic if any of the above mentioned topics are triggering to you. ♡
You can read pt. 2 here!
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"This year's different. This year, is my year. I can feel it... '86 baby!"
And that, it was.
Things finally seemed to be taking a turn for the better in Eddie's life. That year, he geared down and put all of his time and focus into his school work determined not to spend one more second in what was, in his opinion, the most dreadful place in town; Hawkins High. Graduation day finally came and as promised to his fellow Hellfire Club members, who all attended the ceremony, he gave the performance of a lifetime on that stage. 'They can't get me in trouble anymore.' he thought as he shredded an air guitar whilst sprinting towards the faculty, hollering as he did so. Once he was face to face with his long time nemesis, Principal Higgins, all of the cleverly thought out disses he had come up with over the last year seemed to fade away. He blamed it on nerves, but deep down he knew that his distain was overshadowed by an immense sense of joy and relief. To everyone's surprise, Eddie calmly grabbed his diploma with a mischievous smile and exited the auditorium gracefully.
'Finally, a new chapter can begin.'
_
After some much needed time off in the summer allowed him to contemplate his next move in life, Eddie started applying for jobs around Hawkins. His preferred establishments such as the library and record store were, unfortunately, not hiring. Despite the tried and true efforts of his friends at Family Video, they too, were not in need of new employees. He contemplated sticking to his main source of income, but knew that the drug market in Hawkins was not a sustainable nor stable option. Truth be told, he only started dealing as a way of making extra cash whilst still in school. He grew tired of it pretty quickly, but promised himself that the second he would graduate, he would ditch this unconventional side hustle.
His new objective was finding work that would allow him to make enough money to find a place of his own. As much as he loved Wayne and was forever grateful to his uncle for taking him in, he couldn't stand to see him spend one more night on the dreadful pull out mattress.
After weeks of grueling efforts on Eddie's behalf, Wayne came home with some good news one Saturday afternoon. With a hiring flyer and about 8 bags of groceries in hand, he nearly kicked the trailer door down from excitement. "Eddie! Boy, you home?"
Eddie quickly shuffled out of his bedroom to see what the commotion was about. Noting his uncle's erratic breathing and bulging eyes, he was quick to grab the grocery bags out of his hands to allow him to catch his breath.
"Everything okay?" he asked cautiously, unsure what had his normally calm uncle so frazzled.
Wayne waved the flyer into the air and let out a series of chuckles. "More than okay, look what they had hangin' on the wall near the checkout at the supermarket!"
As Eddie turned to face the piece of paper in his uncle's hand, a grimace started to form on his face when he processed the words written on it. "Ah man, i don't know. I'm not really skilled in the art of packing groceries..."
"Come on now, son. You already know the basics, where do the eggs go?"
Eddie stared blankly at his uncle while blinking slowly. Wayne blinked back at Eddie theatricality while motioning for a response.
"Uh, in the bag...?"
"Where in the bag, boy?" his uncle persisted, his once excited tone now slightly annoyed.
"Maybe on top so they don't get broken...?"
"See! It's common knowledge. You could also stock shelves or somethin if you don't wanna pack the bags!"
"Yeah, it's worth a shot, i could use the money..."
_
Come to find out, the supermarket was in dire need of staff members, and Eddie got the job that same day. Given that the entire store was understaffed, he was able to snag his preferred position of stocking shelves. The uniforms weren't great, and having to hear the same tunes everyday was somewhat unbearable, but the money was good so he couldn't complain.
A few weeks into his new employment, Eddie was introduced to the newest addition to the team. Given that she was also put in the stocking department, they spent much of their time working together and got along great. They would often joke around together, their sense of humor practically identical. Along with her kind and rambunctious personality, they also shared common interests such as reading and music. She was the perfect girl, he thought.
Upon getting to know one another, Eddie quickly learned, much to his dismay, that she had recently moved to Hawkins with her boyfriend so he could be closer to his family.
Needless to say, Eddie's love life was never something he had the opportunity or desire to explore whilst in school. The lack of female attention and constant bullying made it difficult for him to find anyone he wanted to get to know in a romantic way. He was rather disappointed to find out that his latest love interest was already spoken for, but quickly accepted it as such.
This minor disappointment didn't stop them from blossoming a wholesome friendship over the course of the next few months. Their normal 7 hour work days always seemed so short, and Eddie was longing to spend more time with his new friend outside of their place of work. Unfortunately, the fear of rejection, accompanied by the constant sense of exclusion he had faced in his prior years had really taken a toll on his confidence, preventing him from ever seeking out friendships outside of his circle of friends.
Those thoughts and worries were momentarily silenced one Friday morning when, to his pleasant surprise, she enquired about his plans for the weekend. This wasn't unusual, they often spoke of their upcoming outings, but typically Eddie was the one to initiate this topic of conversation in hopes that she would suggest hanging out. The idea of potentially spending time together outside of work was thrilling, so he tried his best to play it cool. "A whole lotta nothing, how about you?"
"My boyfriend's colleagues invited him out to this party but i don't really want to go..."
"So you're hoping a conflict arises preventing you from attending this social obligation?" he quipped while smiling.
"Actually, i was hoping maybe you know the person hosting the party and wouldn't mind attending? It'd be nice to see a familiar face there when my boyfriend inevitably ditches me."
Her eyes met the floor as she spoke her last sentence, an action that didn't go unnoticed. The topic of her significant other wasn't mentioned often, in fact, most times Eddie forget she even had a boyfriend. Of the times he was passively mentioned in conversation, Eddie got the impression that he wasn't the nicest person and that she wasn't entirely happy with him. He tried his best to set aside those thoughts, thinking they were definitely biased and he might be reading too much into the situation.
"Does this mysterious party host have a name?" he said in an attempt to lighten the mood.
"Tom Silverman i think, have you heard of him?" she asked, hope radiating from her eyes.
"As luck would have it, he's friends with my buddy Gareth! I could probably make an appearance." he teased.
"Yeah? Think you could make time in your busy schedule for me?" she reciprocated.
"For you? Anything."
_
The drive back to her place felt like a blur. Her mind was clouded with thoughts of her earlier interaction with Eddie paired with the excitement of spending time with him later at the party. She loved her boyfriend, she really did, but...
She couldn't bring herself to say it, let alone think it. The reality was, he didn't treat her the way she wanted to be treated. Hell, the way she deserved to be treated. Prior to them moving to Hawkins, Samuel had cheated on her for months on end with a close friend of hers. The betrayal was unforgivable, at least, that's what she thought at the time. Samuel had a way of getting into her head, planting ideas of his own and spinning the truth in ways that would make her question everything.
Following the infidelity, he had managed to convince her that the best way to make amends and save their relationship would be to move away from their hometown. Far from all distractions so they could focus on rebuilding what was broken. This was far from what she wanted, now more than ever since meeting Eddie. He was always so kind to her, a luxury far too often stripped away in her current relationship with Samuel. She loved how she felt when she was around Eddie, even in their strictly platonic relationship.
The hypocrisy of the situation made her want to melt away into a big pile of nothingness. She could feel herself growing fonder of Eddie with each passing interaction, no matter how mundane they were. Something as simple as Eddie asking her about her weekend, or when her birthday was, warmed her heart. Did Samuel even care to remember? He forgot about it last year.
Guilt was eating away at her the more her feelings grew. She would never cheat on Samuel, knowing all too well how heart wrenching of an experience that is to go though. Despite that, she couldn't help the gnawing feeling of infidelity as she felt her feelings for Eddie become more prominent and the distance between her and her partner growing. It wasn't all her fault of course, she suspected Samuel was still up to no good whenever the phone would ring at odd times throughout the night and he'd shoot out of bed to answer it. She knew interrogating him was no use, so she kept mental notes of all the occurrences, in hopes of one day working up the courage to leave him.
Apart from him persuading her into staying, there was also the web of lies she felt she had to uphold to avoid judgement from her loved ones, Eddie included. She felt awful lying to him about the reason for her move, but at the time, thought it was necessary for some sense of self-preservation.
As she pulled into her apartment complex, her racing thoughts came to a halt. She put the car in park, let out a sigh and made her way into the building. Once inside, she was met with none other than Samuel, already plastered at 4:48pm, the party wasn't until 9pm. This would make for a long grueling night. She quietly greeted him before excusing herself to go freshen up.
Samuel's work friends arrived shortly after she got into the shower, the sudden ruckus alerting her of their presence. She hurried out of the shower so to not hog the bathroom for too long and tried sneaking into their shared bedroom without alerting the group. Her efforts were overshadowed by a distasteful comment made from one of the men. She wasn't sure what bothered her more, the unsolicited remark about her body from a complete stranger, or the fact that her boyfriend, the man who was supposed to look out for her, laughed and entertained such disrespectful banter.
The frustration made tears well up in her eye as she quickly shut the bedroom door and locked it, hoping she wouldn't have to face the men for a few more hours until they had to leave. All the while, the only thing keeping her sane was the prospect of seeing Eddie later.
_
Eddie was a bundle of nerves from the moment he clocked out of work until he pulled up to the party with Gareth. Six pack in hand, he nervously made his way towards the front door before being stopped by his companion.
"Hey man, there's nothing to be nervous about, alright? If you wanna leave at any point, just let me know."
Gareth's reassuring words did little to alleviate Eddie's stress, but it was still nice for him to know that he had support tonight. With that in mind, he gave his friend an anxious smile and they let themselves into party.
Upon first glance, the party was lively and everyone was having a great time. The pair made their way towards the kitchen to put their beer in the fridge, then made an attempt at finding the host to greet him. Eddie had never met Tom, but had heard good things about him through their mutual friend. Whilst on the hunt for him, Eddie's eyes made contact with a sad looking girl sitting alone on a dingy sofa in the back of the living room, red solo cup in hand. He excused himself from Gareth and quickly made his way over to his friend. The moment their eyes locked, excitement was riddled on her face. She jumped off the couch and embraced him in what was arguably the best hug he had ever received.
"You came!!" she exclaimed, visibly intoxicated.
"I'm a man of my word." he said in a playful tone, placing a hand on his heart.
She playfully shoved his shoulder while taking a sip from her drink, giggling the entire time.
"So uh, where's your boyfriend? Am i finally gonna meet the man of the hour?" Eddie's tone was less than enthusiastic, through no fault of his own. Luckily she was too drunk to notice.
"Well," she began, "as presumed, i have been abandoned. Yet again!" although she tried covering it up with a laughter, her eyes gave away her true emotion.
"Well," he said mimicking her tone, "i am more than happy to entertain you until he gets back."
He could have sworn he saw a faint tint of pink painted on her cheeks for a moment. A tender smile was shared between the two before he was abruptly shoved by an unknown subject who was quick to wrap an arm around her.
"Oh sorry man" the lack of sympathy along with his cocky grin gave away the man's identity.
Samuel.
"Don't sweat it, man." Eddie retorted, annoyance prevalent on his face.
She gave Eddie an apologetic look before introducing the two. Her boyfriend quickly brushed off the pleasantries and turned his attention back to his girlfriend.
"Where have you been babe?" he slurred, his hold on her arm becoming increasingly tighter. Her discomfort was clear and as Eddie was about to intervene, she calmly lifted his arm off of her while stating: "Waiting for you, babe." her tone replicating the one Eddie had adopted moments ago.
Samuel grew annoyed, muttering something under his breath before once again, disappearing into the crowd.
"He seems friendly." Eddie stated in an attempt to break the awkward silence.
"I'm sorry about him, he's... not the best at introductions."
"No kidding..."
Moments passed without further dialogue, Eddie debated mentioning his concerns but felt it wasn't his place. I mean really, how would he even put into words what he was thinking? 'Hey, you know that douchebag boyfriend of yours? Yeah, he doesn't deserve you'.
"Well," she broke the silence, "I better go check on him, will you stay a while?"
"As long as you need me" he responded.
She shot him a warm smile before venturing into the crowd to find Samuel. Eddie waited until she was outside of his line of vision before letting his smile falter. He quickly ushered to the fridge to grab a can of beer to calm his nerves. The rush of euphoria from seeing her accompanied with the displeasure of meeting Samuel left him feeling very disgruntled. He was zoned out, sipping the beer in his hands relentlessly, when he felt a hand tap him on the bicep. Turning his attention towards the person to his right, he was met with a familiar face.
"Hey, you alright?" Gareth asked, concern prevalent in his tone.
"Nah man, wanna go have a smoke?"
_
The initial effects of the alcohol she had consumed in an attempt to numb herself seemed to have faded away quickly following Samuel and Eddie's interaction. As much as she wanted to spend the night with Eddie and let her boyfriend mingle on his own, she felt obligated to go looking for him. The party wasn't held at a mansion by any means, but it certainly wasn't a small house. After searching for what seemed like 25 minutes, she finally found Samuel along with a few of his friends in a bedroom in the basement. Upon entering, the first thing she noticed was a dark green colored table with small plastic bags on it, filled with what looked to be pills. She was quickly ushered into the room and prompted to lock the door before being urged to sit down.
"Sam, what are you doing-"
"Babe, baby, hi!" his tone was drastically different from their previous encounter. He seemed much more erratic and his pupils were blown out.
"Are you okay? I've been looking for you-"
"Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I'm great baby. How are you?"
His frantic eyes and antsy demeanor, accompanied by the unknown substance beside him gave her all the context she needed: He was high. She contemplated her next move, being careful not to upset him.
"I'm fine," she started, "actually, i'm a little tired, i think i'm ready to go home." She knew little could be done to grant her wishes at this point given that she had had far too much to drink to operate a vehicle and Samuel was much less equipt to in this state.
"What... Really? No baby, the night's just starting. You're not having fun?" She was getting ready to answer before being abruptly cut off, his question apparently rhetorical. "I know what will help. Have this." He grabbed her hand and placed one of the chalky pills in her palm.
"I'm not doing drugs, Sam." she said firmly.
"Do you trust me?"
She paused, knowing this was a trap. This wasn't the first time he'd used this tactic to get her to do something she didn't want to. Her delay in responding seemed to aggravate him and he was quick to snap at her.
"Fine, go home then. I just wanted to have a nice time with you tonight. S'what i get for trying." He began shifting his body away from her, turning his attention back to the group.
Through no fault of her own, it had been hard-wired into her brain that in order to avoid an argument and mental torture for the next week, it was easier to agree with whatever he was saying.
"No, no! It's just..."
"You're scared?" his friend said while snickering.
"I've just never done this before..." she replied looking away so no one could see her anxiety ridden expression.
Samuel cupped her face with his hands, an act of intimacy he hadn't shown in years. She melted into his touch, craving to feel a sense of worthiness. "Baby, you'll be fine. I took it and feel amazing. We'll feel amazing together and i'll take care of you if you don't feel good. I promise."
Samuel had often made promises he couldn't keep, and although the little voice in the back of her mind was screaming for her to walk away, she fell victim to his manipulation once again. They exchanged a few promising words to one another before she swallowed the small narcotic, internally comforting herself: 'What's the worst that could happen?'
_
Following a much needed cigarette break and pep talk from Gareth, Eddie composed himself and entered the house once again. Once inside, he scanned the room in an attempt to spot out his friend, but was unsuccessful. He figured she might be using the restroom or mingling with people around the house and decided to enjoy his second and final beer of the night with Gareth.
_
20 minutes had passed since she took the unknown substance from her boyfriend, and up until this point, she had convinced herself that she probably wouldn't feel it, or that if she did, it would feel the same as marijuana. But oh, she was wrong. So very wrong. She noticed her heart began to beat faster and her palms were significantly more damp than before. She felt this overwhelming sense of anxiety wash over her and her ears began to ring. Still sat next to Samuel, she grabbed ahold of his arm in a subtle attempt at getting his attention. Whether he was too high to notice or purposely ignoring her, he had no reaction to her touch. Initially feeling embarrassment, she put that feeling aside and decided to vocalize her distress.
"Baby, i don't feel good, m'heart's beating really fast and-" words kept spilling out of her mouth at a much faster rate than she normally spoke. The chatter in the room never faltered, the noise adding fuel to the fire, making her anxiety worsen. Samuel eventually cut her off, insisting on the fact that she was fine. His invalidation floored her feeling of distress, her heartbeat increasing in speed. She could now hear it in her ears. "I don't like this baby, i wanna go home. Please, can we go home." she pleaded, tears starting to form in her eyes.
Samuel grew annoyed with her, his high being compromised by his girlfriend's distress. He offered to take her to a different room, away from all the noise and she agreed, the commotion from the room she was currently in proving to be too much. Luckily for her, there was an additional guest room in the basement, one that was currently vacant. The prospect of spending one on one time with her boyfriend, especially while in such a vulnerable state brought a great deal of comfort to her. That sense of relief was short lived as he stated that he wanted to get back to his friends, insisting on her trying to get some sleep.
Unbeknownst to her, the drug she took was a stimulate, making sleeping next to impossible. Information that Samuel conveniently didn't mention for his own benefit.
He tucked her into bed and promised that if she called out for him he'd be there within seconds. With a kiss goodnight and more reassuring words, he shut the light, closed the door and headed back to the adjacent bedroom to continue his antics. She was left with her wandering anxious thoughts, but tried her best to fall asleep.
After a short while, her attempts were unsuccessful and her anxiety worsened. She tried to calm herself down to no avail and resorted to calling for her boyfriend. No answer. She tried once more, this time a little louder. Still nothing. Time seemed to escape her. She wasn't sure if an hour or 5 minutes had passed. All she knew was that she had been calling for him for what seemed like forever, to no avail. The most hurtful part of it all was overhearing him talking and laughing with his friends in the adjacent room. Surely if she could hear him, he could hear her? Perhaps he was choosing to ignore he cries for help. The idea of getting out of bed to venture into the other room was far too overwhelming in this state, so she settled into bed, holding onto the sheets tightly and hoped that he would come check up on her soon.
_
With almost an hour having passed since he had last seen her, Eddie grew concerned. He figured with the amount of time that had passed, it wasn't unreasonable to ask the other party goers if they had seen her.
His efforts, although valiant, were unsuccessful. Once he established that she wasn't on the main floor, he decided to wander around the house in hopes of running into her. When he overheard Samuel and a group of men cackling in the basement, he made his way down the stairs.
Once he reached to bottom of steps, he noticed a source of light coming from a closed door, the secondary living room he was now standing in vacant and dark. 'Mystery solved.' he thought, she must be in there with Samuel and his friends. As he started up the stairs again, he stopped dead in his tracks when he heard a faint voice coming from the back of the basement. He slowly made his way towards the unlit room and placed an ear against the closed door. That's when he heard it again, only this time, he recognized her voice, calling out for her boyfriend.
Eddie wasted no time opening the door, only to find her laying in bed in the dark. He carefully made his was towards her, crouching down to her level.
"Hey, hey. It's Eddie. Are you okay?" he gently asked. The only response heard was a series of whimpers. Once his eyes adjusted to the darkness, his heart broke. The light from the living room that leaked into the guest room reflected off of her tear stained cheeks and puffy eyelids; she had been crying for quite some time. Eddie wasn't an expert on body language, but judging from her tight grip on the bed sheets and her limbs curled into the fetal position, he could tell she was scared.
"Hey, hey. It's okay, you're safe. I promise. Do you need water? I'll get you anything you need, just tell me..." he stopped himself from uttering anything else, worried he would overwhelm her with questions. After pausing for a moment, he swallowed his pride before asking: "Do you need me to get Samuel?"
She let out a soft cry, her grip on the bed sheets tightening. The mere mention of his name reminded her of the betrayal she felt. He promised he would look after her, but didn't. Instead, he left her in such a vulnerable state, a state she never wanted to be in in the first place.
In her best attempt at composing herself, she was able to mutter out a sentence before her breathe hitched again: "I wanna go home, please." she buried her face in the covers as her body shook, a combination of crying excessively and the drug shaking her form. She was so cold, no amount of heat from the blankets seemed to help.
"Okay, okay, i'll get you home. Just... One minute. I'll be right back, i promise."
Eddie carefully got up and exited to room, gently shutting the door. He made his was towards the room Samuel was in, politeness the last thing on his mind as he barged in. He glanced around the room, noticing the drugs littered across the table, then met Samuel's gaze.
"Are you aware that your girlfriend is crying her eyes out 10 feet away from you?" he spat, shooting daggers at him.
There was a moment of silence, followed by snickering from a few of the men in the room. One of them who, Eddie could only assume was a friend of Samuel's spoke up. "Jesus, what a buzz kill, you owe me for that pill, Sam."
It all clicked. Eddie's vision blurred in what could only be described as a cloud of fury. The echo's of their laughter only fueled his rage as he started putting together what had happened. With every ounce of restraint he could muster, he gave Samuel once last death glare before storming out, being mindful not to slam the door to prevent startling her in the other room.
Slowly opening the door, he tried to come up with the best plan on how to proceed. The two beers he had drank over the last 2 1/2 hours were in no way enough to inebriate him and he knew she needed to be taken home. Once again crouched down by the bedside, he gently placed a hand on her shoulder and began speaking softly.
"Hey, it's Eddie. I can take you home, just need to know your address."
Her crying had subsided but she was shivering and grinding her teeth uncontrollably, a side effect Eddie recognized from whatever drug she had taken. Her lack of response prompted him to try again, this time in a much softer tone.
"Sweetheart, i'll take you home just please, i don't know where you live. Do you have your house keys? Where do you and Samuel live?"
The whimpers that left her lips broke his heart. Eddie figured if he couldn't get an answer out of her in this environment, maybe removing the stress factor would help.
"Okay, can you stand up for me? Here, let's get you up"
As he began helping her from the bed, her sudden exclamation startled him. "No! Please, m'really cold. I need a blanket." Distress painted across her face as she wrapped her arms around her frame, Eddie pondered what the best option would be. After a few seconds, he figured Gareth could deal with the repercussion of his next action later.
"Okay, come on, i've got you." he said as he gently wrapped the giant comforter around her shoulders, guiding her out of the room.
Once they arrived at the base of the steps, he grabbed the excess blanket that was previously dragging along the floor to prevent her from tripping. She was unsteady from the drug, her legs felt like they were made of jelly. Eddie helped her up the stairs, supporting the majority of her weight. Once they reached the main floor, he directed her towards the sofa she was sitting on earlier in the evening and helped her down onto the soft cushion.
"Wait right here." he said in a caring voice. As he began getting up from his crouched position, he felt a cold, damp hand grabbing his.
"Wait, wait, where are you going?" her voice was low but filled with worry. He turned to her, finally getting a good look at her face since being in the dark basement and his heart sank. He tried his best not to show any signs of concern, but this proved to be challenging. Her normally light hazel eyes were almost completely black. Her hair was disheveled and her face slightly puffy from crying.
Eddie had been around plenty of people under the influence before, but never anyone he felt such deep adoration for. It was torture seeing her like this. He once again crouched down so he could meet her eye level and gave her hand a gentle reassuring squeeze. "I've just gotta find Gareth to let him know i'm leaving. I drove him here, don't want him to be stranded. I'll be right back, i promise."
Her gaze softened a bit, and with a small nod, Eddie took that as a go ahead to proceed with his plan. He lifted her hand up to his mouth to give it a quick kiss before getting up to find his friend.
Luckily, with one quick sweep of the main floor, he was able to find Gareth and get him up to speed on the situation.
"What a prick, we should fight that guy."
"Yeah, normally i would agree but i gotta get her outta here. Are you cool finding a ride home tonight?"
"Oh ya, don't sweat it! I can always just crash here if it comes down to it. Get her home safe."
"Thanks man, i'll see you later."
Gareth patted him on the shoulder and with that, Eddie made his way back to the sofa. "Alright, let's get you home, yeah? Up you go."
Taking the same precautionary steps he did while going up the stairs, they made their way out the door to Eddie's van. He helped her into the passenger's side, carefully closing the door and hurried over to the driver's side. Once in, he buckled both of their seatbelts, started the car and began driving away. Once the car was nicely heated and her shivering had subsided, he figured it would be a good time to try to find out the location he should be driving to.
"So uh, am i going the right way? Do you live close by?"
He glanced over at her, smiling sweetly once they made eye contact. She returned the smile, but the sadness displayed on the rest of her features made her true feelings apparent.
"We're far" she mumbled, "i live next to work..."
Eddie sighed internally. He didn't mind the drive, he was more concerned about her having to sit in a car for 45 minutes. "Alright, i'll get us to work and you can tell me where to go from there, yeah? You have your house keys?"
She paused to think and let out a defeated breath upon realizing; their shared house key was kept on Samuel's lanyard. She brought her hands to her face in despair and began apologizing profusely. Eddie wasn't quite sure what she was apologizing for, or to who even. He softly put a hand on her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her, gently moving his thumb over the blanket that was still draped over her.
"It's okay, look we're not that far from Tom's place. I'll turn the car around and we can get the key. I can go in, you don't even have to leave the car-"
She shook her head in quick motions, her hands dropping from her face suddenly. "No, i can't, i'm..." she trailed off, turning to face the passenger's window.
The silence was broken by small cries leaving her mouth. Eddie slowly pulled off to the side of the road and put the car in park so he could focus all of his attention on helping her as best as he could.
"Are you worried he'll be upset?" he began, trying to get to the root of the problem. His question was met with more tears falling from her eyes. Her breathing was becoming more erratic and her hands began to shake. Eddie was torn, he knew she desperately needed to get home, but at what cost? He couldn't live with himself knowing that once he dropped her off, she would be left alone to face that jerk again. He made a snap decision, once again choosing to deal with the potential consequences in the morning.
"Alright, let's go to my place for now. It's not that far from here and we can figure out what to do from there, yeah? Is that okay?"
In an unexpected turn of events, her crying stopped almost immediately following his words. "Can i please stay there tonight?" she muttered softly, eyes glued to the floor of his van.
She knew it might be asking too much, but the thought of facing her boyfriend tonight was too much to handle. Eddie's eyes widened, but he quickly composed himself before responding. "Of course, anything you need."
_
Obeying the rules of the road was out of character for Eddie, especially when it came to speeding, but tonight was different. He made sure to make the drive to his trailer as peaceful as possible for her, not wanting to worsen her distress.
Once there, he was relieved to see Wayne's truck was gone. At least she wouldn't have to worry about his uncle seeing her in this state.
He quickly hurried her inside and onto the sofa before scrambling around the trailer gathering anything he deemed might be of use. He came back into the living room with additional blankets, a glass of water and a can of soda from the fridge, setting them down on the table. He proposed switching out the blanket for a fresh one, doubting the cleanliness of the one currently wrapped around her.
"S'too cold." she slurred, grinding her teeth once again.
Eddie knew better than to try to rationalize with her so he thought of a solution that would make for the blanket swap to be more pleasant. He grabbed one of the blankets, walked over to the dryer and tossed it in. Making his way back to the living room, he picked up the can of soda to open it and slid closer to her on the table. "Here, have a sip, you must be really thirsty."
Up until he mentioned it, she hadn't noticed how dry her mouth was, or how chapped her lips felt. Now that she was in a comfortable place and felt safe, the fear and adrenaline wearing off, she was very aware of the physical discomforts she was feeling. She quickly grabbed the cup of water, opting for the least cold drink made available and downed the liquid within seconds. Eddie's eyebrows raised and he let out a small chuckle. She met his gaze with a shy smile, clearly embarrassed by the intensity of her gulps. Their exchange of grins was interrupted by a shrill ringing coming from the hallway; the dryer alerting them of it's cycle being complete. Eddie shuffled over to it, quickly returning to the living room with the warmed up blanket.
"Here, feel this." he started, placing a corner of the fluffy material in her hands "Nice and warm for ya. How about we get rid of that dingy old thing?" he said gesturing to the stain riddled comforter.
She agreed with a nod, preparing herself for the sharp cold she would feel once the blanket was no longer on her. Eddie attempted to make the switch as seamless as possible, quickly wrapping the fabric around her. Once the warm blanket was snug around her, Eddie lightly tugged on either side in a playful motion. Their faces were mere inches from one another, he wished they could stay this close forever.
"Better?" he inquired in a soothing voice.
She nodded in response. "Thank you."
He stayed crouched in front of her, his hands remaining on the blanket for longer than he probably should have. He scolded himself internally, before retreating onto the adjacent chair. She instantly missed his presence.
It was fairly late at this point, the clock reading 1:04am. Eddie knew she wouldn't be getting much sleep while the drug was still in her system, but offered to set her up in his bedroom, reassuring her that he would take the pull out bed, not wanting to cross any boundaries or make her uncomfortable. She pondered for a few moments before agreeing. They walked over to the back of the trailer, Eddie leading the way with the extra blankets in hand. He breached the entryway of his bedroom and thanked his past self for tidying up the mess that was littering his bedroom floor earlier in the day.
Once there, she took in her surroundings admiring all the art and little trinkets laying around. Eddie grew nervous from the extended period of silence and cleared his throat before saying "Is this okay?" referring to her sleeping arrangement for the night.
"S'cozy." she responded with a warm smile. She made her way towards the bed and plopped down rather sloppily, her legs still feeling like they could give away at any second. She settled into bed and he began turning off the lamps, pausing before switching off the last one.
"Want this one on?"
"Yes please" she responded quietly from under the blankets. She had the soft material pulled up to her nose and was laying on her side watching him maneuver around the room.
"You got it" he said, a dorky smile painted on his face as he turned to look at her. Despite still appearing strung out, Eddie was enamored by her. He always thought she was beautiful, her current state never wavered that. He thought she looked especially adorable all tucked into his bed, her eyes glistening with gratitude and what appeared to be admiration. She closed her eyes for a brief moment letting out a content sigh, the feeling of safety and comfort engulfing her like a warm hug.
Eddie took this as a sign he should retreat to the living room, making sure to wish her goodnight, as well as reassuring her that she could call for him at any point in time if she needed anything. Although she had been let down earlier by a similar unkept promise, she knew Eddie meant every word he said.
Once in the living room, Eddie opted to sit on the sofa for a while to ensure that if she did call out for him, he would be awake and ready to help. He turned on the television in hopes of keeping his mind busy, his thoughts currently consumed with the image of her in his bed. He despised his heart for making him feel so fondly of someone who was in a relationship, albeit an unhealthy one. Was it so wrong for him to hope that she would leave him? The rage he felt accompanied by sorrow for the way she was treated tonight was overbearing. With a grunt, he stood up from his seat and made his way to the refrigerator in hopes that there would be a cold beer stashed somewhere in there. Wayne wasn't opposed to him drinking his supply, so long as he replaced what was taken. Behind the milk carton were two cans of Pabs Blue Ribbon. He grabbed one of the cans and headed back to the sofa, making sure to open it slowly to minimize the noise from the aluminum cracking.
_
The second Eddie had left the bedroom, the feeling of anxiety she had previously felt slowly crept it's way back into her core. She shook her leg in an attempt at self-soothing, trying her best to remind herself that she was safe now. She knew that she could call for Eddie at any point and that he would be back in the room within seconds, but the feeling of embarrassment and fear of bothering him prevented her from doing so. She tossed and turned, trying to get to sleep without success. Out of frustration she sat up from the bed, the blanket still wrapped over her head in a cocoon shape. She began looking around the room once more, admiring the posters on his wall. His bedroom was exactly as she had pictured it to be. Having only seem him in their work uniform up until tonight, his haircut and ringed fingers had given her a pretty good idea of what his style would be; his bedroom reflecting that perfectly.
His bedroom was quaint and felt like home. A feeling she hadn't felt in years since being with Samuel.
Samuel.
The mere thought of him sent a cold shudder through her that shook her form. She worried about his reaction to her not being home once he arrived at their apartment. He always accused her of infidelity, likely projecting onto her his own bad behavior, and would surely lash out at her the next time he saw her. She began to spiral, images of past mistreatments and abuse at the hand of her partner crashed into her like a violent wave. Tears streamed down her cheeks uncontrollably, as they had many times before.
She had spent many nights crying into a towel in the bathroom alone so she wouldn't wake him with the sound of her whimpers, as he laid in their shared bed without a care in the world. He lacked the ability to comfort her, expressing it many times, usually by saying: "i don't know what you want from me". In those moments a simple reassuring hug would have sufficed, or any act of compassion or intimacy, but he didn't care. Not then, and certainly not now. This sudden realization was all too much for her to handle in this moment.
She desperately needed comfort. She attempted to compose herself before slowly creeping out of bed and pausing at the ajar door. Part of her knew it was wrong, but the desperate need for consoling overshadowed the morality of her decision. In a barely audible tone, she called Eddie's name and waited nervously inches from the door. Almost instantly, she heard him getting up from the sofa and walk hurriedly to the back of the trailer. The door opened quickly startling her and Eddie let out a small yelp, not expecting to see her standing so close to the door.
"Jesus," he let out with a sigh, clutching his chest. "Sorry, ah, i thought you'd be in bed." After recovering from the small arrythmia he was almost certain he suffered, he chuckled and asked, "Everything okay?"
Upon his arrival, a sense of dread and self-loathing washed over her. She feared rejection but also reprimanding from Eddie. He knew she had a boyfriend, and had been so considerate of that all night, was she really about to ask him if he could sleep in the same bed? It wasn't in a sexual way, but somehow the lather felt worse. Seeking emotional intimacy from someone other than the person she was dating? She felt despicable. The worse form of betrayal in her mind was emotional infidelity, which is exactly what had been taking place over the last few months. She couldn't be blamed though, not entirely. Her absent and neglectful partner had driven her into the arms of a more caring, emotionally intelligent man and for that, he only had himself to blame.
"S'worse when you're out there. Can you stay here? Please..." she managed to mutter.
Eddie's heart skipped a beat. He would do anything she'd ask to help her feel better. "Yeah! Yeah, of course. Let me go get the extra blankets and a pillow and i'll set up on the fl-"
"Could you sleep next to me?"
Her broken tone of voice shattered him. It had become very apparent to him that her relationship was far more damaging than it appeared to be on the surface. Every question she had asked him, whilst in her most vulnerable state, had a sad undertone expecting rejection. The mention of her partner's name alone had caused her intense distress. Without letting another second go by, he sprung into action. He gently agreed and motioned towards the bed, letting her get comfortable before climbing in himself. Not wanting to cross any boundaries or make her feel uncomfortable, Eddie held off on laying down. Instead, he sat up on the bed with his back against the wall, trying to take up as little space as possible as he nonchalantly stared ahead.
She was laying on her side facing him, when he caught a glimpse of her looking up at him. He turned to face her, trying to think of any topic of conversation to hide the fact that he was screaming inside. All the feelings he had for her that he had managed to suppress all this came crashing down on him. She was the girl of his dreams, and she was laying in his bed with him. He quickly shut down those thoughts and focused on her well-being; it was his top priority. He took in her facial features, now that the blanket was no longer covering the bottom half of her face, and noticed she was grinding her teeth still. "Try and relax your jaw." he said with care.
"M'sorry"
"Don't need to apologize," he reassured laughing lightly, "just don't want you to be sore in the morning, is all."
There was a brief moment of silence as her smile grew, then a snort escaped her as she buried her face in the blanket. The innuendo now becoming apparent to Eddie who, also broke out into laughter.
"Oh god, i didn't mean it like that!" was all he managed to say, bringing his palm up to his face. His embarrassment was short-lived, her laughter filling the room was music to his ears.
"I know, s'just funny" she said between giggles.
The room went quiet again, the sound of their breathing being the only audible noise. The effects of the drug were slowly wearing off, evidence of that came from her suddenly yawning.
"Wanna try and get some rest?" he offered.
"That sounds good" she responded.
"Okay, lights on or off?"
"Off please."
"Okay," he said, making his way towards the lamp to shut it off. He excused himself to go turn off the rest of the lights, as well as the TV still playing and made his was back to the room shortly after. He carefully climbed into the bed, this time laying down but still taking up as little room as possible.
Eddie was the kind of sleeper that liked to take up as much of the bed as humanly possible, so he know he wouldn't be getting the best of sleep tonight but he didn't care. Knowing that she was safe meant more to him than a good night's rest. They wished one another goodnight and attempted to drift asleep.
A few minutes of stillness passed, she turned to face him, craving closeness and warmth. Tonight's series of events had proven that Eddie was a gentleman and certainly wasn't the type to take advantage of her or intentionally cross any boundaries. She inched slightly closer to him and whispered: "Can you hold me?"
He hummed in response extending his arms for her to settle in. She nestled into his chest, their bodies fitting perfectly with one another like a puzzle. The feeling of contempt and security she felt while in Eddie's arms was unmatched. It was as if nothing could hurt her as long as he was around. He felt her grip on his shirt tighten slightly, her body pushing onto his in an attempt to get closer. "You okay?" he asked.
"Yeah, feels good. Safe." she replied sleepily. Eddie understood in that moment how touch starved she was. She craved intimacy in it's purest form. He readjusted his arm so he could lightly rub his fingertips on her back soothingly. She was beginning to drift asleep, but was still clenching her jaw, an action Eddie was quick to notice. With his free hand, he lightly cupped the side of her face and rubbed gentle circles on her cheek and jaw in an attempt to sooth her likely sore muscles.
"Try to relax your jaw sweetheart, unclench your teeth." he gently reminded her.
His caring instructions were met with a low hum followed by a barely audible "thank you", the tension in her face releasing almost instantaneously.
Eddie bent down slightly to give the top of her head a kiss while softly uttering: "Goodnight sweetheart.", her only response an even sleepier hum than before. In a matter of seconds, they both drifted to sleep comfortably in each others presence.
_
The end ♡
-
This is my first time posting in a while, i hope you liked it, lmk what you think! xo
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taeiris · 10 months
Text
okay guys here’s my crazy unsupported st5 theory that is mostly just me projecting my need for madwheeler bonding and drama and angst also byler duh
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disclaimers: i never make theories so this is extremely messy probably, i know jack dookie abt writing shows i think of this as my own little version of what i would think would be very cool to happen, if this has loop holes dont ask me anything bc idk either
OKAY LETS GET ON IT
so first things first here is what i am taking into consideration for the theory to happen:
• mike pov, self reflection and introspection (he is gay and in love with will byers okay)
• madwheeler bonding, theyre both complex n misunderstood
• the upside down isnt just one dimension, i came up with this bc of how different the ud looks now
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compared to when henry arrived.
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to me theres like an umbrella dimension (yellow one) and others under it (blue one/hawkins ud, the void, etc)
this is also lowkey supported by the silly boobie diagram the writers posted abt
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OKAY PREPARE FOR THE WORD VOMIT
in this silly theory of mine, a new dimension variant of the ud will be revealed in season 5, serving as a parallel to the void. this is where max is
OKAY another thing is this is also heavily based on those “leaks” that were going around twitter (for me at least) earlier when the strike first started. i remember a few of them claiming that we would get a deeper insight into mike and his own things, so this is my interpretation
this would serve as another vanishing, not really bc its shorter, but this time mike will be getting stuck in this other dimension, eventually finding max BOOM madwheeler serve
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i mean look at them. the potential is insane
ANYWAYS
this dimension is like a combo of all the other ones, picture it like the hawkins ud, with the void’s wet floor maybe
lets go back to the fact max is here, this is her coma nightmare, its like this purgatory dimension vecna put her soul in
in this dimension inhabit your ghosts
this overwhelming, haunting, tormenting realm in your mind where you are constantly confronting all your bad memories, maybe this is kind of how vecna keeps max under his grasp, no happy memories allowed
okay so, mike gets there. how? when? i dont fucking know this is honestly just word vomit fanfiction to me
at first hes confused, scared but mostly confused, picture him screaming for wills name (the parallels) at first it’s empty and eerily quiet, but as he accepts it, the ghosts start coming in.
he gets BOMBARDED with these bad memories, some of them he cant even remember because come on, bro is always neglecting his internalized feelings/monologue in fear of what they say about him
this is where we get his pov on the whole will and eleven situation, amongst other things (like the way he’s constantly stressed thinking about the safety of the people he loves)
for a moment we see him break, bc these ghosts are LOUD and MANY
but it stops
max is here, she’s like “MIKE?”
“MAX?”
shes been here for a fat minute, she knows how to handle these ghosts in fact shes been going thru them one by one ever since, because shes done hiding. and she suspects that the only way to get out is by confronting them.
max saves mike from his ghosts, explains that this place is seemingly a purgatory with levels of memories and ghosts to overcome
this is how we get our madwheeler bonding we so graciously need, as they are part of eachother ghosts since theyre so similar it makes the other mad
this is how our complex misunderstood characters are broken down, explained to the audience, while also discovering the mystery that is this new dimension where at the finish line they might just figure out how to defeat vecna.
because they will
after overcoming the ghosts they find the place that vecna didnt think they would reach as he was so sure they would break and collapse on their own madness
think of it as how el found the source in season 3
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or how max found vecnas lair after running away in dear billy
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except this place is vecnas actual mind, they can see hear and feel what vecna is thinking, his plans and everything
mike wonders how will feels being able to feel this all the time
will feels this all the time
will is always connected to this piece of vecnas mind, to this source
he can always hear vecna
until he suddenly hears max… and mike and theyre calling for help
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theyve figured out key clues on how to defeat vecna, and they have an idea on how to get out. this is how will’s connection comes in handy
mind walkie-talkie
maybe thats what this theory should be called, idk
-
so thats how we get our byler confirmation, madwheeler bonding like never before, mike focus, and the key to defeat vecna
at least in my head
i know this was messy and all over the place but it was very fun to explain and drop all my thoughts ive been vomiting on the gc for months now
let me know what you think, what you would add, if theres anything you think will support this theory?
its all just a theory, for fun! pls keep that in mind
thank you if you’ve read this far🫶
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Yuu is Tired
So idk what this is but I just had an idea for a drabble yk?? A bit angst. Yuu snaps and is GN and is on meds and stuff. I'm get back to reqs afterwards so enjoy
This is also kinda backstory for one of Juatclems reqs I'm working on and potential mean Yuu lore??? Anyways @blushing-concubus since u liked RSA Yuu
The Housewardens along with their vices all sit in Crowley’s office for an annual meeting. By some miracle, Malleus was there, probably because Lilia dragged them, however. As everyone settled in, Crowley took his seat, ready to start the session. “Alright, everyone so today-“
A knock at the door interrupts all of them, “I’m here headmaster, coming in.” You opened the door and visibly stiffened in surprise at everyone there, before giving Kalim a friendly wave back. Your eyes locked with Malleus for a moment, surprised to see your friend here, but a voice snaps you out of your thoughts, “Mx. Yuu, what are you doing here?” Your small smile dropped to confusion. “Did you forget, Headmaster Crowley? You said today you were available to talk to me… You know… About my situation…”
Leona sighed, just wanting to get this meeting over with, he hated prolonging these boring discussions, even more since Malleus was here. Riddle also huffed, such poor planning is making everyone waste their time. Trey put a hand on Riddle's shoulder to calm him. Vil wore the smallest scowl, glancing at the papers in your hand. Crowley looked around at the members there before clearing his throat.
“Ah… Aahhh yes, I totally remember! It was about your way home, yes? Terribly sorry Mx.Yuu but we are having a meeting right now, can’t this wait later.” You paused. Don't get upset. Don't get mad. “Well… I am also a prefect. Maybe I can join in until the meeting ends?” “Yuu, I’m afraid your dorm doesn’t have any other students, this meeting is for actual housewardens.”
Your heart sank at that. Putting off everything yet again. “Well can I just ask you the one question I have? It’ll be quick I swear!” “Mx.Yuu. I am going to have to ask you to leave.” “Right…” You sounded dazed for a moment.
You’ve been trying to have this conversation with him for a full year now. A year has passed with no information regarding your situation. And there has been no support for you as a foreign student both mentally and academically. You've spent a year here in total darkness with no support. “Sorry but uh… I’m not leaving until we discuss this.” “Pardon?”
"I mean…” You refused to bite your tongue now. “It’s not like you would have considered anything they say anyways. You would just drop all your work on me again like you usually do after threatening my basic right to food.” Besides Ruggie choking back snort, the room went deathly silent. “Mx. Yuu…”
“No. None of that. If I dont bring this up now, it’ll never happen.” Your voice was stuttery and a bit wobbly. “I-I I mean- I’ve been trying to talk to you about my situation for a year now and just- every time it gets dismissed or something. I can’t even talk about my problems or get help with my stay here.” Azul and Jade perked up at this, cogs spinning in their mind to create the perfect contract.
“Like, for example, I am always laughed at or humiliated for asking basic questions. I’m new this this entire world and yet everyone expects me to know everything! People are always upset when I dont know of some obscure wizard from a few hundred years ago or old trends that were popular.” 
Crowley sighed, making your blood boil. Your voice sped up, used to being cut off. “It’s really impacting my grade and there's no support for students with similar problems.” Crowley interrupted, “It sounds like you just need to study harder.” You didn't hide your irritated expression. “I did! I have been! I’ve been trying my absolute best but I don’t have a phone and the library doesn’t have anything beginner friendly! I-I mean—``''There are plenty of books in the library and teachers to help, you have no excuses.” 
Your voice trembled, a year's worth of frustration building up, finally coming out. “Okay then, tell me who Nikola Tesla is! Explain to me what Thomas Edison did! If you don't know them surely you must know of Julius Caesar or Cleopatra right?! You see? It's not that easy! And no matter the explanation I give you, you would still need to know more about my world to fully understand anything! And not only that but Grims grades can impact mine? It's not fair!”
You were breathing heavily and you seemed panicked. Crowley tensed up, trying to diffuse the situation. Trey and Riddle both cringed, this wasn’t going to be good. “No, no. Listen to me. I know nothing of this world that I was dragged into! On top of that I have no basic necessities— I barely got my own toothbrush a month ago— and I dont have the medications I need to be mentally okay even though I’ve been requesting them for over a year now! I-I just! ... On top of all of this I need to worry about food and do your job for you. I-it’s just not fair. It’s all taken a toll on my mental health and I just want to go home.”
You locked your eyes with Crowley “Please for the sake of my mental health tell me you have found something. Anything. I need to go home. I need my medication! I can’t be here anymore, I can't take it- I'm scared. I'm scared to even be alone with myself now. I see no way out besides…” You choked back a sob. “Please. Please tell me something. Anything. I can't take it anymore. The stares. the judgement. It's so… suffocating...”
Everyone turned towards Crowley, giving him a few judgemental and wide-eyed stares. Crowley cleared his throat “Mx. Yuu… Finding you a way home is going to take a while. We still don't know what dimension you even—``''Bullshit!” You snapped, glaring at him.
“Bullshit! I had visions about coming here before I did and you were there. Hell, I've been having visions and hearing voices and seeing things since my time here. I don't know if I've officially lost it or what, but…” You paused, to take in a breath. “I mean- You think I managed to deal with all these blots by myself? Don’t get me started on how you expect me to somehow be okay with them after everything too, I have fucking scars on my body that no magic can fucking heal, and you expect me to act like everythings okay?” The housewardens and a certain Vice-Housewarden looked away, guilt building up inside when they watched you pull up a sleeve to show your damaged arm.
“Do you not hear how insane it sounds— And-and-and— you guys don't even have a therapist here to talk to! Fuck, it seems I’m the schools only therapist having to deal with everyones problems and of course no ones there for me because why would they be!” Your voice was getting louder. “I’ve been predicting everything so far! I've been the one having to just… deal with all of this, all while being hungry! It's not fair!” 
You gripped the sleeves of your oversized and dusty uniform. “And I know you have to know something from what I’ve seen. I've reached out to RSA!” Rook’s eyes lock with yours for a moment and you swear you see his expression seem sad for once in all the time you’ve known him. You feel everyones staring at you. Some angry, some guilty, some sympathetic. You can especially feel the shock, most notably from your horned friend along with the floating tablet now on mute.
“RSA, says they know shit about interdimensional magic. I've told them about my situation and they actually offered to take me in and help! Fucking Chenya even said they offer help for foreign students! I don’t know if your just that incompetent or just scheming Headmage, but I am not leaving until you sign these transfer papers. And you are just to transfer me, not Grim. I am still pissed that you dropped him on me and consider us half a student!” Your breaths steadied as you calm yourself.
“I am done, Crowley. I am leaving, and you are going to approve of it.” You stared into the yellow orbs that peaked from behind his mask. Your voice cracked. “Please.” You can't imagine how they would’ve reacted to you foreseeing the future long before you came here. Where NRC is in ruins and the housewardens had to fight a very familiar looking cat…
You don't care if they called you selfish. You e been selfless your entire time here and that got you nowhere. So maybe you have to be selfish...
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sundeathh · 4 months
Note
aizawa with a younger sister in his class and they dont get along well? maybe some angst of some sort?? Thank youuu <333
Here you go, I hope you enjoy it. I added some angst but only after finishing it I realized I also made it oddly comforting.
Family Ties
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Head-canon  |  Masterlist 
Pairing: Brother!Aizawa × Sister!Reader
Fandom: BNHA | MHA  | Words: 950
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The air in Class 1-A was tense as Shota Aizawa, known for his stern demeanor, navigated through the students, making sure to keep a watchful eye on each of them. His younger sister, though, happened to be in the same class. And unfortunately, your relationship had always been strained.
One day, during a particularly challenging training session, Aizawa's patience wore thin. He singled you out for your lack of focus and commitment.
"You there," he barked, his eyes narrowing in on you. "This is not a game. Your lack of attention could cost lives in a real battle. Shape up or you won't last a day in the hero world."
You bit back a retort, the frustration evident in your eyes. Aizawa's scolding wasn't just about your performance; it was a reflection of the strained dynamic between you two. The weight of his expectations hung heavy in the air.
After the class ended, Aizawa approached you, his expression a mix of concern and frustration, though you only took in the frustrated part. "You're not taking this seriously." He started. "You have potential, but you need to focus. Heroics is not a path for the careless."
You resisted the urge to snap back, his words hanging in the air as a silent agreement of the unresolved issues between you and your brother. Shota sighed, running a hand over his face. He wasn't satisfied with your silence, as if he wanted some kind of acknowledgement from you.
Then, when all of your retorts to his scolding gave space to silence, Aizawa grew frustrated enough to finally adress the root issue.
During classes, Aizawa glanced your way several times, catching glimpses of the familiar scowl that mirrored his own. You avoided eye contact, burying yourself in your schoolwork every time. The tension between you and your brother had become a constant undercurrent.
A few days later, Aizawa lingered after class, hoping for a chance to address the underlying issues that had become a rule in your lives.
As the last student filed out, he sighed and spoke, facing you. "We need to talk."
You rolled your eyes, not in the mood for another lecture so soon. "What now? You gonna tell me how to stand properly or criticize my skills again?"
Shota's expression remained stoic. "This isn't about you. It's about us. We're family, and I don't want our relationship to be this way forever."
You scoffed, crossing your arms. "Well, maybe if you weren't so obsessed with your work, we could actually have a normal conversation."
Aizawa's gaze softened, a hint of regret in his eyes. "I know I'm not the best brother. I'm not good at expressing myself either. But I care about you. I just... I have a responsibility to these students, to be the best hero and teacher I can be."
You glanced away, a mix of frustration and hurt weighing on your heart. "So, that's it? Your hero duties are more important than your own family?"
He raised an eyebrow before proceeding, his voice quieter. "No, it's not that simple. But I need you to understand the choices I've made. I want you to be proud of your big brother."
You scoffed again, but this time, there was a glimmer of understanding in your eyes, though you didn't adress it with words. "Proud? How can I be proud when I feel like I barely know you?"
Aizawa sighed, running a hand through his disheveled hair. "Maybe we can work on that. It's not going to change overnight, but I want to try."
Over the following weeks, Aizawa made a conscious effort to spend more time with you outside of class. Whether it was grabbing a quick meal or attending a local hero event together, the rigid walls between you began to crack.
Eventually, he even proposed training together, a mix of combat and quirk exercises. Despite the initial resistance, you found a common ground in your shared abilities. Slowly, you began to see a different side of your brother – not just the hero, but the person.
Attempting to normalize family interactions, Aizawa would invite you over for dinner sometimes. The awkwardness was always palpable, but the efforts didn't go unnoticed. It was a small step towards bridging the gap between your worlds.
As the months passed, Aizawa and you shared more moments together. Some were strained, others surprisingly pleasant.
One day, during a quiet moment, you looked at him and said, finally acknowledging his efforts. "You're doing your best, aren't you?" And for the first time, a genuine smile graced your face in front of him when he nodded.
As time went on, the sibling relationship between the both of you evolved. There were still disagreements, but the unspoken understanding grew stronger each day. Aizawa focused on learning how to balance his hero duties with family, and you slowly learned to appreciate the complexities of his world just as well.
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Likes, reblogs, and comments are appreciated! Check the fixed post for requests & more details!
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drawingbakeryy · 4 months
Note
DROP THE DONNIE BACKSTORY. I SAW THE HASHTAG. PRETTY PLEASE!1!!1!???? NOT FORCING BUT U GOT ME REALLY CURIOUS….
HMMM IM STILL LIKE FIGURING IT OUT STILLLL— BUT ILL DROP SOME
okay so yk the apocalypse started, blah blah blah all thag junk
one thing i know for sure, he had a lab explosion
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which will explain these scars, he was extremely disappointed because in the explosion it did destroyed and ruin creations and tech he worked so hard on, it also ruined his lab which he was pissy about, overall he was just really annoyed abt this and extremely upset
afterwards yk living in apocalypse until he got krangified.. yayyyy
like years later after the explosion
the infection started in his eye, he was out on mission, he wandered off to a infested area which was dangerous but he honestly didn’t care because he needed samples of the krang, he went in and this one krang aimed to his eye, it got into his eye which dee immediately was disgusted by the thought of something in his eye, but it wasn’t long before it started taking over him, it was a fast because it got into his head first, now he’s all infected.
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here’s a photo of how he looks like when he’s infected but his whole arms is covered and also the shoulders to his neck is covered but overall this is what he looks like, the host is now in his left eye like, it completely took over his WHOLE eye, the only way to get rid of the infection is to pull out his eye
imagine the angsttt omfgg
yeah uh, but the eye is extremely sensitive, but it does have the ability to protect itself but closing it and covering it, which i thought is cool. . .
forgot to mention he’s also around in his 30s rn, likeeee two years or smt.
anyways yeah that’s a whole angst potential story, i also would say he was taken from the krang, i havent like given it a whole whole plot or like what happens
but i do say he was taken by the krang onces, he managed to escape though because he’s donnie!!!!🔥🔥
ITS MIDNIGHT RN AND I DONT FEEL LIKE TYPING MORE— but in my small brain this is what i could type🔥🔥🔥‼️‼️‼️‼️ for now
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irelandking · 9 months
Text
avenger/agent reader fic recs
bucky barnes x reader
❤️ = fluff 😔 = angst 🔥 = smut
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one shots:
devotion - @avecra
When a mission with Sam goes wrong, and you’re left bruised and battered, Bucky is there to piece you back together. ❤️😔
teach me - @buckyalpine
bucky x inexperienced reader, Prompt: 7. Sleep princess, you need it 🔥
lessons in love - @violentdelightsandviolentends
Bucky didn't believe in love at first sight. Then he met you. ❤️
the last first kiss - @witchywithwhiskey
you and bucky barnes have gotten close while on a month-long SHIELD mission together, but when natasha romanoff starts asking bucky about his relationship with you, you overhear something that makes you think your feelings are entirely one-sided. ❤️😔
scary movie - @moonbeambucky
The Avengers spend their night off watching a scary movie. ❤️
fallin' for you - @moonbeambucky
The Avengers spend their day off at a farm near the compound where the leafs aren’t the only things that have fallen ❤️😔
lucky - @moonbeambucky
Bucky Barnes was not a lucky man but after meeting you will his luck change? ❤️😔
eyes - @samingtonwilson
Bucky can’t make eye contact very much anymore even with the girl he loves because he’s scared of what he’ll see, or really of what he might not see. (prompt “Please just look at me while I confess, after that you can look anywhere you like, I swear.” is bolded in story) ❤️
mission report: laundry day - @buckysmischief
You and Bucky have been secretly dating for over a year, what will it finally take for the others to find out? ❤️
a wish for 100 - @viollettes
Midnight strikes, officially marking Bucky’s 100th birthday. You surprise the super-soldier with a small treat and a gift that has potential to change everything. ❤️
a thief in the night - @redgillan
A Buck imagine where you both have a secret affair at the tower and one time you’re over at his apartment and you spend another night together. After you cuddle afterwards, you get up to leave but Bucky grabs you and pulls you back into him, begging you to stay cause he dont want it to be a secret anymore. You stay and get official then :) Also with a smutty part hihi :) Requested by Anonymous. ❤️🔥
always more of a hot chocolate person - @ijustreallylovezebras
At meetings with the rest of the Avengers tea and coffee is always offered around but the reader always says no ❤️
a bid on bucky - @samingtonwilson
You spend thousands of dollars at a bachelor auction for Bucky when you could’ve had him for free this entire time. ❤️
repairs - @samingtonwilson
 In love with the robotics expert in charge of repairing his arm, Bucky’s explanations for malfunctions get more and more creative. - requested by @elaine-spades ❤️
get to know you - @notimetoblog
A Secret Santa gift exchange brings two unsuspecting Avengers closer. ❤️
the pain you feel - @meek-boy-rogers
Y/N can feel the pain Bucky is enduring, and vice versa. She feels the immense pain, he feels the soft touch of her fingers along his arm after particularly painful days. (Soulmate AU the two can feel pain, touches, etc.)  ❤️😔
out the window - @meek-boy-rogers
Y/N is set on befriending Bucky Barnes. She is set on making him as comfortable as possible in the Avengers Tower. She wants him to trust more people. ❤️
why is she wearing my hoodie? - @writing-soldiers
Bucky tries to figure out the reason behind his missing hoodie one day, relishing in the idea that might be a win-win situation for both of you.. but what might that lead to?  ❤️
this means war - @moonbeambucky
Pranking the Avengers was all fun and games but when Bucky snaps you wonder if you’ve gone too far. ❤️😔
a harmless crush - @omg-foreverfilledwithweird-posts
Assigned to the Winter Soldier by S.H.I.E.L.D to help him to accommodate to society, staying in the Avenger’s tower, and occasionally doing paperwork for STARK industries, you’ve grown close to James Buchanan Barnes, developing a crush on him in the process. So when you, reluctantly, tag along to a baseball game with the Avengers, and the kiss cam lands on you and Bucky, things get interesting. ❤️
the date - @softlyspector
Bucky is a nervous wreck that asks the reader on a date. It goes differently and better than expected. Anxious!Bucky. ❤️
healing and healed - @softlyspector
Y/N is always healing Bucky, no matter how small the injury. Based on this ask. ❤️
music - @softlyspector
Bucky doesn’t really understand ‘modern’ music. The reader is there to help ❤️
tease - @beckzorz
A fake date with a Danish alien tech dealer. Bucky gets bored, and maybe a little jealous, while he’s waiting in the command truck outside. It’s all downhill from there. 🔥
you're teasing me - @the-bau-quinjet
Sam offers to help you when Bucky refuses to duet with you on karaoke night. ❤️
my name isn't - @the-bau-quinjet
You find out the guys (Bucky, Steve, and Sam) have a bet as to who can kiss you first, so you confront them at Tony’s team building karaoke night. ❤️
i can do more - @the-bau-quinjet
The team underestimates Y/N’s strength until one day when her powers save them all ❤️
distraction - @itsapeterthing
request: “bucky x reader where reader is really attracted to bucky’s fighting side while he’s defeating the bad guys?” ❤️😔
made to fit - @abovethesmokestacks
reader knits bucky a sweater ❤️
seven minutes in heaven - @lokidoki-imagines
There was no prompt for this one, but I just needed to write a bit of Bucky loving and this kinda just came out…Sorry not sorry for the straight up filth! Just remember to wrap it before you tap it kids  🔥
imagine being in a secret relationship with bucky - @yeahbutimagine
Combining @crayonbreaker ’s request with an other one I got. The prompts were n°32 (you know what’s the best part about not wearing makeup/ you can rub your eyes whenever you want) and the 2nd rq by @anahi0101 wanted a fluffy fic where the reader and Buck have been secretly dating and the team finds out. ❤️
drunk in love @bethdutten
you get a little drunk at one of tony’s celebratory after-mission parties. and bucky is there looking so fine and-- fuck it. you can’t keep your hands off him ❤️🔥😔
one of the guys - @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky
you play get down mr. president with the boys and get hurt ❤️😔
number one fan - @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky
you prank bucky by wearing falcon merch ❤️
keep warm - @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky
you and bucky after a mission in a safe house sharing a bed ❤️
drunk words are sober truths - @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky
bucky gets drunk off asgardian mead and confesses his feelings ❤️
concussed - @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky
“Hello! I’m an absolute wh0re for hurt/comfort and wanted to request if you could pleeeeaase write reader really sick with a concussion + soft caretaker Buck?” ❤️
be my sidekick - @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky
you and bucky go and see movies together and get together ❤️
how's your head? - @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky
you get harassed on the subway and bucky helps take care of you ❤️
seeing red - @buckysfaveplum
bucky can’t just sit and watch as a man makes you uncomfortable in a bar ❤️
more than safe - @witchywithwhiskey
when you're injured on a mission in sokovia, bucky barnes comes to help—and you share a soft moment together ❤️😔
make believe on christmas eve - @green-eyeddragonfanfiction
When your family insists you bring your [nonexistent] long-term boyfriend over for Christmas, you panic. You hadn’t expected to be put in this situation; you never thought you’d actually have to bring “him” over. ❤️
drive? - @softlyspector
Bucky asks the reader on a date to which she readily agrees. Or, Bucky’s attempt at a car make out. ❤️
i love you - @ugh-supersoldiers
‘I love you’ isn’t a phrase you expect to hear from Bucky Barnes anytime soon, so when those three daunting words slip from your lips on a romantic getaway around Christmastime, your certain he won’t respond well, but he proves you very wrong… ❤️🔥
trapped - @notyetneedcoffee
Reader is trapped on a mission with Bucky. Sex pollen story.🔥
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strangertheories · 11 months
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As a jancy shipper i agree. I am beyond disappointed and extremely pissed that they messed up with jancy this much if stancy is not endgame. S4 was so bad that i dont know if i respect the writing choices anymore. It was also bad to watch steve regress even though he had a development, but they literally regressed him to add angst? Nancys character still being thrown into a love triangle is not good. It is giving "this character is written by male writers". Now they have to resolve a lot of this mess in s5. When they could habe brought up other stuff to touch upon. I dont like how time was wasted on this in S4.
I'm a Ronance shipper and whilst I think the plot of S4 was well written, the way they wrote Steve and Nancy was... A choice. Genuinely crazy to me that in the same season as Jopper and Lumax, they decided to again reduce Steve's character to "the one who likes Nancy". His only moments with Robin were to talk about romance and his only moments with Dustin were weirdly vitriolic. He and Eddie had potential but they made their focus, again Stncy. WEIRD.
S2 and S3 were about letting her go. He became more likable through Dustin and Robin. And then they gave those pairs barely any moments together and put the focus on Steve getting back together with a girl he dated two years ago? So weird. It made me dislike him after he was one of my favourites in S3. They just thought "oh he is a babysitter and is stupid and likes Nancy, let's make that his whole character!" When in my opinion, his arc should have been about realizing he's insecure and dates for validation and giving up on dating would be the best thing for his character.
And do not get me started on how they're handling Nancy. They established her whole schtick as being that girl who wants a career and doesn't want to be a housewife and then decided to pair her up with the guy who wants SIX CHILDREN with her. I'm praying they backtrack but the script made it seem like she liked it, saying her heart skipped after it. Which is so fucking out of character. Clearly, they just view the independent female character as a reward for Steve not being a douchebag which is insane.
I'm praying they pretend that never happened in S5. I like Steve, but a character regression at the expense of a female character is, to quote Nancy, bullshit. Thanks for the ask!
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saccharinemeat · 4 months
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What are your opinions on Hfjone ships?
oh fucking man
okay imma get crucified , but here we go. opinion on popular ones + my own rareship
Liam/Bryce
fucking SUCKS. it can only work if you're self aware about how absolutely awful and hurtful liam is,and i feel from what ive seen that the fandom just reduces them to 'omg doomed yaoi' and like, woobifies them. This ship only and only works as one sided,forced and extremely toxic (in my eyes). Bryce deserves better than Liam, and liam relentlessly hurts Bryce down to the very goddamn end (← i say this as someone who is currently fuckin obsessed with liam and self recognizes in him 😐)
Liam/Amelia
I like this one. I feel like theyre pretty good for each other, although, it's sort of a doomed one,in the sense of how it would work only if they were to be in the plane forever. I do feel like Amelia sort of lost herself in the plane forever. If those two ever got out, he'd have to take some charge on their shared recovery and Liam is NOT gonna deal with that well. Still a cute ship,and I like it.
Amelia/Charlotte
...why? this feels like pairing the leftover main characters because everyone is focused on the Boys TM. they dont really have any chemistry,like,even theorically i feel like they wouldn't mesh well,unless you wanna make Amelia basically Charlotte's therapist. But yay, women! i can't be mad about this one,really. I don't mind it
Liam/Airy
Lairy is...complicated, emotionally. I can see it actually being a thing,but it's really in a fucked up way. definitely a 'i hope we both die' kind of pairing. I think about it and it gives me heartache that i cant explain. it hurts because they both are awful in different ways but also they are trying. I will say i do enjoy it but in a way that makes me hurt. lots of angst there. I think this one especially benefits from becoming a ship that happens after moldpack being A thing
Liam/Charlotte
Okay this one is not popular,in fact i feel like nobody but me is into it but theres so much potential here. especially the way they would be so horribly,terrifyingly bad to each other. I can imagine Charlotte getting out instead of Bryce,and how different it all would be. her prideful nature and liam's manipulative tendencies are so deliciously wrong. I feel they would bring the worst out of each other. I have a lot to say about them but like. Consider those first 5 months. Liam was as isolated as Charlotte was,he only sorta rejoined the others in the last two months stretch, and I think they might've interacted during that. And just, Charlotte WOULD be interested in solving the mystery,she would jump on that chance because she needs control and Liam would be elated at first and horrified later and AGH it would be so messy and interesting. please ask me more about moldpack. im the charlotte/liam person number 1 fan now.
and now rapid fire other ships,
Oscar/Bryce - can see it,and i feel like it makes sense within Bryce's trauma streak. I can imagine them bonding and it getting a bit too close
Bryce/Stella - I wish this had more exploration,object shipcest is so insanely rare. I like it
Taylor/Amelia - kinda cute,can see it if taylor stayed in the plane. Especially if it starts as a sort of one sided crush that goes too far
Liam/Owen - this is cute,can kinda see it but only in a no-show scenario (as in, ONE never happened and this is a coworker romance thing)
Charlotte/Parker - it upsets me,but i can see them as having hooked up once and Parker catching feelings while Charlotte is super uncomfortable about it and that explains that weird tension.
Bryce/Amelia - eh. sure? it's cute but i dont care for it a lot. also i dont care for sodacentpack a lot,but it's better than sodapack alone i Guess. get ♣️'d lmao
ALSO, the crackship/crossover with showvember
Airy/Popcorn - NO. piss off the joke is boring and lame and IDK i hate it.
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lily-174 · 2 years
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Hey! I saw your requests were open. Would you be able to do a Steve x reader, just make it pure angst lol and if the reader could be the older Henderson sister that would be great as well! Toodles lover 🤎
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‘death doesn’t just happen to you’ - steve harrington
trigger warning: depression, low self image, angst, fluff
a/n: i really don’t think this is what you had in mind but i really wanted to write a steve comforting reader type thing so here we go!
**
since you found out about the upside down there had been a lot more pressure put on you to look after dustin and his friends, also working long shifts, school and maintaining your relationships with steve you were very stressed. you’d had a few issues with your mental health before, but obviously it wasn’t really taken seriously. you’d never really heard anyone talk about what you’d been experiencing. and you didn’t want anyone to think you were weak, or anyone to worry. and you definitely didn’t want anyone to think you were crazy.
with everything that had been going on in hawkins, steve had noticed you’d been putting yourself in more dangerous situations to help everyone and just in general he noticed you were doing naive things that could potentially cause you harm. your little brother dustin had also noticed.
**
“harrington!” dustin shouted running into the video store where steve and robin were working.
“be quiet dustin” robin sighed behind a self putting different movies on the shelves. as steve walked out from the back of the store.
“henderson, what are you doing here? arent you supposed to be in school or something?”
“no. no i am not. have you noticed y/n acting strange. what if somethings going on with her? like will, or vecna or something!” dustin started rambling about different theories.
“you do know, human problems still exist too right?”
“but what if it’s not!”
“look henderson, go home. make sure she’s okay. and i’ll come by later and talk to her okay? i haven’t seen her in a few days i’ll see if somethings up. don’t worry. we’ll figure it out okay bud”
**
you sat in your room getting ready, doing your makeup. you felt like shit, you’d been in bed the past few days, avoiding steve, school, your brother, basically avoiding everything. that was when you heard a knock on your bedroom door, you ignored it but they opened the door anyway. when steve walked in you got up straight away.
“what are you doing here?” you asked suprised he was here.
“i’m checking up on my pretty lady.” he smiles wrapping his hands around your waist.
“steve go home..” you stated removing his hands from your waist, his face dropped.
“what’s going on with you?” he asked crossing his arms.
“nothings going on with me.”
“well there clearly is something going on! y/n you don’t think i’ve noticed! every thing that has happened recently the way you’ve been acting. you dont care as much anymore ” he exclaimed, after your recent behaviour. you putting yourself in danger he was worried.
“i care about everyone else being okay.” you replied bluntly.
“see that’s the problem, you don’t care about getting hurt! you know how i’ll feel? i’ll be devastated, if you die. i will literally go out of my mind! what about dustin hm? death doesn’t just happen to you y/n it happens to everyone around you. i don’t want to be standing at another funeral!” he explained, you eyes slightly brimmed with tears.
“whatever is going on with you, talk to me please.. i can’t loose you okay?” you looked up at him and nodded with tears eyes and hugged him tightly, he returned the hug pulling you into him holding you, he just needed to feel you. know you were okay.
**
you laid in bed with steve, he was waiting for you to explain what was happening. what was going on inside your head. but it was taking you a while to figure out how to put it into words. you snuggles into his chest and took a deep breath before you began.
“i just i don’t know what’s going on anymore.. the nightmares, flashbacks, i don’t know what i’m doing with my life steve.. i hate everything about myself and i don’t know i can’t sleep i can’t do anything. i worry constantly about everyone getting hurt.” you sighed as a few tears ran down your cheeks, steve was completely shocked, how could you hate yourself? he loved everything about you. he didn’t even know how to respond to that. he could try and help you with nightmares, you’ve always told him, sleeping with him makes you sleep better makes them go away. but hating yourself? he could she you how beautiful he thinks you are? reassure you?
“y/n.. baby, you know i’ll help you with the nightmares. if you want me to stay here for a while to help i can. i want to. you don’t have to worry, we’re safe again. nothings gonna hurt us okay? and for well the other thing.. i think you’re the most beautiful girl i’ve ever met. you’re stunning, everything about you is so perfect. i just want to hold you in my arms and kiss you. i’m so lucky to be your boyfriend you know that. i’m here for you okay? never hide anything from me. i’m not gonna judge you.” his words made more tears spill down your cheeks you nuzzled your face into his neck and held him tight, you wanted to be closer to him but it wasn’t possible. he held you tight as you cried and he kept whispering compliments into your ear as you fell asleep.
**
real ones will know where i got some inspiration for this from :)
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nijigay · 9 months
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hiiii :3 I noticed ur one (of a few) ppl who ships boniji on tumblr, and I wanna know if you know any accounts/artists who ships them so I could follow them to satiate my boniji fixation >.< Also, some bocchi x nijika questions I wanna personally ask: what songs do you recommend that reminds you of them? Also, what are some boniji fanfics you recommend/like? I probably already read most of their fics but I wanna know what others like. Lastly, ur personal boniji headcanons if you don't mind sharing... 👉👈
I only ask blogs rarely cuz I'm shy so no need to answer immediately...
I'm just brainrotting over boniji so much! im so normal about them (◔‿◔)
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AWAWAWA i love boniji like so much like too much like its become my main personality trait!
but youre right!!! it feels like boniji fans are mostly japan natives and there dont seem to be many english speaking boniji fans! ohhh i wish there was more of a following! imagine a boniji zine in the west! i would pay money to get involved with that
im kind of embarrassed about shoving my ships in ppls faces all the time and this might get long and its just me like rambling about my OTP so like .. gona put it under a read more lol. seriously this post is like almost 2k words long thats longer than my average fanfic chapter
i hate to be a shill but im going to be a shill for my fic recommendations:
ive been working on a lowkey corny boniji hanahaki fic on AO3 and some other oneshots, so maybe you would be willing to check my own stuff out?? (if u want .-. im really amateur with this stuff despite being an art student lol) its been on hiatus for like half a year but im just adhd af and keep restarting. im still working on it frequently tho and im secretly hoping to start updating on a consistent basis soon. but i also liked fics like "Midnight and Daydreams" and "Bubblegum Detergent" and "A Sellout Night" and "Just Enough to be Enough" and "A Kiss is Not A Cure". MANNN i remember that last one fucked me up bad when it was posted. it was only the second ever dedicated boniji fic and like I LOVE angst but with how small the sample size of fics was at the time it was like AUFHAUIJKADGF. all those fics are super super good though! i also love the third one, i love the trans bocchi HC personally
umm as far songs songs tho, i guess the ones i associate with boniji most are:
"veil" by keina suda, i remember drafting some animatic for an angsty AU of Hitori living on post-Kessoku
"STEP&CLAP" by yoshino aoyama (aka yoppi aka bocchis VA <3), i think yoppi making the song speaks for itself but its a rly cute song and i love thinking of Hitori and Nijika like tap dancing to it?? check out the rest of yoppi's debut album too!! her voice is so pretty and i was so happy finding out that there are 11 songs with her voice, instead of the 1 from the anime
idk why but i also think of them a lot when listening to PMMM's ost by yuki kaijuri, like "desiderium" and "not yet" and "mada dame yo"? these r kinda a stretch though but idk!!
i also like compiling music that reminds me of them into spotify playlists, if youd like some inspiration for your own! this one and also this angstier one
i have a lot of boniji headcanons but i feel like its hard for me to like list them all in one spot because they usually come to me with context during relevant conversations?? but ill list whatever i can think of!:
this ones not necessarily boniji but i was thinking about it like an hour ago, but i really like the idea of Seika being a huge boniji supporter. like in the source material she already finds Bocchi really cute, so I get the impression she would really like to be an older sister figure for Bocchi (and probably gets jealous of Kikuri for holding that spot in Bocchi's life lol), and so Nijika being a potential love interest for Bocchi would make Seika double down hard on supporting boniji. she'd probably be the one who brings Bocchi up to Nijika more than Nijika would bring her up to Seika?? i also like to imagine that for Seika she has a similar complex to Yoyoko. but instead of "Bocchi is stealing my spot as Hiroi's younger sister figure," it would be "Kikuri is stealing my spot as Bocchi's older sister figure" LOL . if that makes any sense at all
this ones actually taken from a japanese twitter user, but they moved on from boniji after the anime ended. but they had some headcanons that REALLY stuck with me. my favorite was the idea that Bocchi and Nijika both have inferiority complexes with one another. iirc their (translated) words were along the lines of "Bocchi thinks of Nijika as a pure, comforting light in her life, one that could be muddied if Bocchi got involved with her. On the other hand, Nijika thinks of Bocchi as a reliable hero who outshines an ordinary girl like her." i just REALLY like it. it also reminds me of this conversation that Yoppi and Suzushiro had on the BTR podcast, about Bocchi and Nijika's first meeting! like nijika literally brought light into Bocchi's life awdsfsgdhgfjh
actually that same user above also made a tweet that is the reason why i associate Keina Suda's "veil" with boniji! they made a tweet about an AU idea, where, in the event that Nijika would ever pass away, Seika would give Bocchi her ribbon, which Hitori would wear from that point onwards as she continues to play music to honor Nijika's memory. they also suggested that in the opposite event of Hitori passing away, Nijika would possibly do something very rash out of despair but thats dark hahaha!!!!
i kinda think this goes without saying and i think its actually a fairly common HC for BTR characters in general, but I can definitely see Bocchi being trans
I like to imagine that shortly after Volume 2, Bocchi and Nijika would probably have another conversation
eventually, i'm sure if Bocchi and Nijika pursued a relationship that they'd eventually move in together (or like into the same room? if Kessoku Band had a sharehouse?), and since both Bocchi and Nijika tend to be minimalistic with their room decor, their shared room would again become filled with a ton of Ryo's clothes and items and instruments, like how Nijika's room at Seika's apartment is
i think they'd both end up being really touchy with each other, especially when nervous? Bocchi kind of already does this when she's in new places (eg bringing Kita to Shimokitazawa, or going to FOLT for the first time and being dragged by Nijika), but I think it would grow to them finding comfort with each other?
idk if this is necessarily a HC but i really like how Bocchi and Nijika emotionally support each other, even in source. Nijika is shown to have a really good read on Bocchi (to the point of Bocchi worrying that Nijika is actually a psychic), knowing Bocchi's common thought processes, and picking up from Bocchi's mother during her first visit to Kanazawa that karaage chicken can bring Bocchi out of her anxiety attacks, and seems to be the only character who actually comments on Bocchi's growth as an individual and actively tries to facilitate it; but she also doesn't lovebomb Bocchi with praise, striking what seems to be a good balance for pushing Bocchi but also being a reliable confidant for her too.
one of my favorite details from the anime that i really feel doesnt get talked about as often as it should is when Nijika finally notices that Bocchi is guitarhero! she definitely wasn't the first to notice (Seika noticed first, but it seemed like Seika only knew about guitarhero via Nijika. When she notices that Bocchi's playing sounds familiar, her thought process immediately goes towards wondering why Nijika isn't noticing, and then she just tells them to get back to work) but she was the first one that Bocchi admits it too. but my favorite part is how Bocchi says that she wanted to change and grow as a person before telling them the truth, and she says that she especially wanted to grow before Nijika in particular found out! its just really cute, i love how Bocchi was worried about disappointing Nijika. and i like how, after some growth, Bocchi's dream turns from "becoming popular" to "making Kessoku Band the best band it can be" which is like almost basically the same as Nijika's dream! and so it's really nice when Bocchi doubles down on that goal by not remotely entertaining the idea of leaving Kessoku Band, even when goaded by promises of popularity.
last headcanon! because i ran out of thoughts and just came up with this on the spot. but i also like the idea that as the years go on, Bocchi and Nijika in particular may kind of become more similar in personality. i mean, they'd definitely still be distinctly them, but i like to think that Bocchi would eventually start picking up more optimistic habits and stop grimacing all the time, while Nijika would eventually become a little more lax and not reflexively try to dismiss her own negative feelings via looking at the silver lining. i thought of that when Nijika kinda dismisses her family dynamics with her mother's passing and her father's neglect after Kessoku's first real performance, as well as Nijika seeming to admit after inhaling Bocchi Dust(?) during her and Kita's Kanazawa visit that some of her optimism is performative
ok another one Nijika seems to have her art skills commented on sometimes so i like to imagine she has doodles of Bocchi in her sketchbook (alongside everyone else but mostly Bocchi). like think of like Miles Morales drawing a ton of Gwen Stacy like that kinda deal but with Nijika drawing Bocchi. and like Bocchi finds the sketchbook and Nijika freaks out and Bocchi actually doesnt look bc she doesnt want to do something wrong. but then Ryo or Kita take it and look instead and then show Bocchi and Bocchi melts into a flustered puddle
wowwow this got long! sorry! i really mean it when im like OBSESSED with these two like i think ive thought about them on a daily basis ever since the episode aired where Nijika bought Bocchi a cola. isnt that cute, too!? she picked up on Bocchi's favorite soda so quickly! and her buying a box of energy drinks for Bocchi despite not understanding why at all! girlfriend behavior
i really really want to make more boniji content, i'd like to be more active in posting my fics and drabbles and drawings, someday soon. right now most of my boniji content is just illegible sketches in my sketchbook lol
also thank u so much for like sending this ask im like BEGGING internally all the time to be given the chance to talk about them! i dont think theyre like a rarepair or anything, especially with them seeming to be like the second most popular BTR ship in japan, but i do think that not many people talk to them in the english side of the fandom! theyre super super cute and have really good chemistry.
this entire post is probably like a total carwreck i hope its even readable
ill also use this post as an excuse to post my own HCs for a Kessoku Band's relations chart. it's a bonus for reading this far. i'm sorry for draining 22 HP from you with this brain dump
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