#Probably desensitised because of his parents | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kookidough · 4 days

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analysing vance hopper because he lives in my head 24/7 !

tw for like. literally everything the black phone covers!!!!!!

also there's some special effects gore rather far down in the post idk just i feel like i should warn you just in case

okay so before anyones like "but bee!!!! he only had 6 minutes of screen time in a 102 minute long movie!!!!! he was only on screen for 5.8% of the movie!!!!!" and to that i say i Know it was a real tragedy so a lot of this will be built on personal interpretation and subtext and stuff said behind the scenes and whatnot

so firstly i wanna rot about what his childhood/upbringing might've been like..... i havent quite decided on something definitive but i think we can take one look at his character and realise that is glaringly obvious he had a bad childhood, in one interview the actor that plays him (brady hepner) says "the background i had set up for vance is that the reason he was the way he was is his home life was fairly difficult, you know maybe his dad was either not there for him or he wasn't supportive, maybe he was fairly abusive, and so that creates a hair trigger sense of rage in vance" hair trigger meaning his patience is literally as thin as a strand of hair it does Not take a lot for him to snap

there more to it after that which i'll get into soon but yea thats the gist of it it's clear he had absent/neglectful/abusive parents and that would certainly contribute to why he's so angry all the time, maybe acting so explosive was the only way to get his parents' attention, either good or bad, so he just internalised that. obviously rage and anger issues like vance's lead to violence (not in all cases but in his case it does) and i think a neglectful and abusive upbringing would obviously expose him to more violence than a normal childhood would, therefore normalising it and desensitising him to it, whether he's seeing it play out in his own home and/or on television or something like that (because i doubt his parents would be the kind to monitor what content he's viewing)

i feel like he has little control over his life and that only adds to his anger, which in his case leads to a fight when his buttons are pushed too many times. i think he probably takes great pride in being the toughest in town and whatnot and winning fights and being perceived as strong and scary is good to him and helps him regain control/power, something he doesnt have at home. the rest of the quote from the interview i mentioned earlier states "this pinball machine could have been the only thing that he has in his heart that's like, good, like 'holy cow i did this, i set the score,' so when someone comes along and messes it up for him, it takes away the only thing that he has. i think that that's when he switches to a 'now you're gonna pay for that'"

similar to what i said about fighting, the pinball machine and his high score is something he has control over and its an important part of his reputation/image like. hes literally pinball vance ! and the whole thing about that high score being the "only thing he has in his heart that's good" implies that hes. well. pretty shit at everything else, which is pretty much canon if you remember that gwen said vance was held back twice in school. makes me think that while he's not the brightest in school he's certainly street smart

moving onto ermmmmm him getting kidnapped era because im sure youre wondering "well bee if he's so street smart then why did he get kidnapped" so may i raise two theories (this is. literally all i got and its not even concrete, me and my friend gray (@staggersz) tried to figure out how this could even happen and this is the most plausible thing we've got. so shoutout to him real quick he has had to deal with me being unnormal about vance for like a year and a half thanks king couldnt have done all this without my rotting buddy)

so either he got taken by surprise (most likely option) or vance's trust was gained first via getting given quarters at the pinball machine and small talk and shit like that but this is unlikely because i feel like it'd take a loooooong time for someone like vance to trust a some random stranger adult man when he clearly has issues with trusting and respecting people older than him and people with authority (e.g. cops, his parents, or school officials) so yea being taken by surprise would probably be the most realistic option, i always see people on tiktok being like "how did the grabber kidnap vance hes so strong!!!!" dude its a 15 year old boy against like. a 45 year old man who's already claimed two lives its really not gonna be a fair fight here

before i get into the next part i wanna quickly address a theory i absolutely Hate and it is so easily disproven and that is the theory that vance is the grabber's son or is related to him in some other way and i see it Far too often on tiktok and i HATE it. from what ive seen this all stems from his dream sequence where he kicks open the fence to albert's house and, presumably, goes inside after being dropped off by the police after the grab n go fight. idk if some people just straight up didnt realise this but clearly in real life he is going to his Own House??? in the dream it's only albert's house because this is how he chooses to show gwen the house she's trying to find her brother in, the house that he himself was killed in??? i hate the theory i hate it sm

the dream sequence itself is interesting though as the ghosts seem to only be able to conjure up what theyve seen in real life (like how bruce can picture the outside of the house and show that to gwen but the house number is all flipped and not right beause he doesnt know it) so vance being able to picture the house and the number and the gate and every detail would imply that hes seen it before, but im going to explain that away as either he got out once before like with finney's failed escape attempt, or the house is most likely on the route he walks to school or the grab n go or something and he hasnt actually been there prior to being kidnapped

mini rant over now onto being kidnapped i guess, so i used the missing posters to try and estimate a timeline of how long each ghost boy would've been in the basement for (although the missing posters are notoriously unreliable for details such as looks/height/age/etc, the dates seem to all line up). so we know the order is griffin, billy, vance, bruce, robin, finney, right?? if we use the poster date then billy was taken on may 4th, 1976, a month and two days after griffin was taken (april 2nd 1976). vance was taken on september 23rd 1977, almost a full year later (stay with me im going somewhere with this), and after that bruce was taken on july 18th 1978, again almost a full year later

its established in the movie that the grabber stalks his victims before he takes them (canon because we literally see the van watching finney and gwen as they walk home from school early on in the movie) but we dont know how long he does this for since griffin/billy and robin/finney were taken such short distances apart and then the others were taken such long distances apart, also it's possible he could stalk his next victim while the previous one is still alive, etc etc lots of confusing factors, but if i've done the maths right then the absolute maximum time vance could've spent down there is 9 months and 25 days, or 298 days, so erm . let that sink in !

howeverrrr in the movie gwen states that vance went missing "last spring" and september is definitely not in spring, meaning he could've been down there for a year or even longer. an explanation or excuse i could think of for the movie and the missing poster saying different things (other than the missing posters being known for some areas being wildly inaccurate) is that maybe he was taken in spring but wasnt labelled as officially missing until september, when he was properly linked to griffin and billy's similar disappearances and the mysterious grabber? i can imagine it'd be very easy for law enforcement, especially in the 70s, to dismiss someone like vance as a runaway until they get solid evidence that he was taken. idk though thats just my personal excuse / angsty headcanon for the difference in information

not sure what exactly killed him but we do hear from vance himself that "he took his time with me" so it was probably blood loss from a variety of injuries, if we look at him in his ghost scenes we can see his hair is absolutely covered in blood which indicates head injury, he clearly has a broken nose and bruising around his eyes as a result of it, he has these deep cuts on his abdomen area (apologies for the image quality but i believe they're like. sfx pieces you would wear under clothing)

and he also has just like. minor bruising (like the fingerprints on his arm) and other random blood splatters on his face and neck (assuming the blood down his neck comes from wherever he was bleeding on his head) so Yeah overall very unpleasant way to die obviously

okay now the part thats actually in the movie and it only took me 13 paragraphs to get here: vance as a ghost!! first thing i wanna point out is appearance wise i just want to say that when he's a ghost he's missing his choker and that fact Pains me. anyway personality-wise i feel like being violently murdered has, understandably, kicked his rage up to like. the highest level it could possibly go. he's insanely snarky and downright rude to finney on the phone, showing no empathy to the fact that finney is literally in the exact situation he was in

i feel like the whole "this is the nightmare end of your pathetic little life" and "if you knew what you had coming, you'd be fucking terrified" thing is definitely to scare finney on purpose and to get him to do something, vance might as well have just told him he's never going home cuz thats how it came across LMAOO, it is startling though because vance is clearly speaking from experience, that he was literally fucking terrified, and he is warning finney in his own weird way

the thing i think sets vance apart from the other ghosts is that while he does help finney, he does it for a different reason than they do. the other ghosts want finney to escape, to get out, to be free, to live, but personally i dont think vance cares about that. the only thing he wants is for albert shaw to be dead, for someone to seek vengeance, to do what vance couldn't. vance doesn't care if it's bruce or robin or finney or whatever boy could've come after that, he doesnt care as long as that man gets what he deserves after what he put vance through, and i see this through the scene at the end of vance's call where finney thanks him for his help and vance says, and i quote, "helping you? this isn't about you, fuck him! and apologies for being repetitive but to me it just literally proves that to vance, this isnt about finney or his escape, its just about revenge

we dont get to find out what happens to the ghosts once the credits have rolled, and i dont think we quite know enough about tbp's version of ghosts to guess what theyre up to, but i have a few theories :3 maybe theyre no longer bound to those two houses and they can now go anywhere they want in town? or maybe since their shared goal of stopping albert has been achieved, the ghosts can finally pass on to whatever is waiting for them next. i dont think vance would be content to pass on that quickly or easily as anger lingers, but i hope he'd be able to let go of it eventually, and hey we might find out in the sequel. i pray it mentions him cuz i will just die if it doesnt

sometimes, ok thats a lie, frequently i think about an au where he survived or escaped or whatever but ohhhh boy this post is already a train wreck so that au would deserve its own essay of a post :3 if u actually genuinely read this far then Wtf thanks for reading the ramblings of an absolute madman, only pure delusion could get like 20 paragraphs about a guy with 6 minutes screentime but hey thats how i roll, thanks again to my pal gray for letting me rot and thank u to my other pal ana for also enduring all this rot

hope u enjoyed my interpretation of vance hopper im going to crawl in a hole now and probably brainrot some more, thanks again for ur time :3

#the black phone #tbp #tbp vance #vance hopper #character analysis #i literally rotted my entire brain for this one #normally i hate when ppl tag characters in a post that isnt really about them im gonna tag the other characters cuz i do mention them quite #a few times so apologies to ppl that are fans of anyone that isnt vance this post is Vance Centric #tbp robin #robin arellano #tbp finney #finney blake #tbp griffin #griffin stagg #tbp billy #billy showalter #tbp bruce #bruce yamada #tbp gwen #gwen blake #the grabber #albert shaw #the black phone 2022 #i am the number 1 vance hopper fan and this proves it #if vance has 100 fans im one of them. if vance has 10 fans im one of them. if vance has 1 fan its me. if vance has no fans im dead.#sorry to everyone that followed me for total drama content i have an absolute disease for this movie and this guy #back to regularly scheduled content soon trust #not expecting this to do numbers cuz theres actually only like 4 tbp fans on earth but had to let two years worth #of absolute brainrot for this movie that has like. barely any merch and only the slightest scraps of fan content #i stayed up all night writing this

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f0point5 · 8 months

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I definitely agree with the reason why yn and jos are get along with each other (also she's probably his #1 choice for being max's partner) is because she definitely has a similar maybe the same dynamic with her own family. Especially with her father. That would make her understand both max and jos better because if she doesn't see her father at fault then she wouldn't see jos' mistakes either because in her eyes they are not mistakes. Also she gives me "tough love is the best love" kinda vibe which also explains why she and jos can get along well.

Also that's probably why mick and her had a fall out too because i dont think someone like mick, who has a loving family can differentiate tough love and straight up insulting because they would see them as a same thing

I wouldn’t say she necessarily agrees with Jos’s parenting, but I think there’s a certain level of desensitisation to it. Firstly because of her own family dynamic. Even Max himself I imagine is desensitised to how much people would take issue with Jos’s parenting. But then second, I think she’s also seen the good side of their relationship. She was there for all the times they were having fun, that isn’t talked about so much in interviews as the “gas station” incident for example. So I think for her there’s more balance to it as well.

But also, I think it would very hard to be close to Max if she was so at odds with Jos, because he and Max are so close. Whatever one thinks about his parenting, Max loves his dad, and credits him greatly for his success. I can’t see him really having a deep connection with someone who doesn’t at least partially accept that relationship.

I think the reader would definitely look back and think Jos has made mistakes, but I think she would also take the view that for better or for worse, Jos did have a hand in raising the person she loves most in the world. Jos clearly loves his son, and she does too, and they would both be proud to see him achieving what he is, so there’s a commonality in that.

I definitely think her and Mick are very different people, which wouldn’t be such an issue if they weren’t in the F1 Petri dish. I think she’s very “Red Bull”, kind of “pressure creates diamonds and destroys everything else”, and as much as she’s tried to temper that in order to support Mick, it’s probably been stinging him more than she’s realised.

#max verstappen #max verstappen x reader #mick schumacher

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softfae · 1 year

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becky blackwell and her family history

i have this theory abt sxf that keeps bugging me and its that the real head villains are going to turn out to be becky’s family + Damian’s mom specifically.

now, do i think Donovan isn’t going to be a part of it at all? no, of course not. but i do get the feeling that Melinda is the one actually pulling the strings, with the major help of the Blackwells, possibly Becky’s mother (because of the mother’s club thing that Melinda and Yor are in). Everyone agrees Melinda’s first introduction gave everyone chills and I saw quite a few other people saying that it feels like Melinda is worse than Donovan too. Her cold aura, her lack of emotions towards her son and the way she gave even Yor the creeps? Definitely something there. +we already know that Becky’s family creates MAJOR military weaponry, and it seems like they’re pretty desensitised to how much destruction it causes. Melinda and Donovan could be funding + helping the Blackwells create those weapons, making them even deadlier than before. i mean look at this.

Both of becky’s hairclips are literally military weapons of mass destruction - a literal bomb and a fighter jet?? for ur 6 year old??? and then of course there was the pink tank earlier too. It’s as if they are proudly claiming it and showing it off like family heirlooms, or a harrowing reminder that their family has this major power, shown even in their 6 year old daughter’s hair accessories and toys. So obviously, becky isn’t aware of what this really means in terms of her family’s role in the war, and she’s probably been fed propaganda just like Damian and the other Eden children since her birth. So where am I going with this? A lot of fan theories/fanfics include how Damian is gonna feel finding out about Donovan and his involvement in the war, but what about Becky? Becky being told by Anya one day that her parents are both children of war, and then realising what her family has been doing for decades, presumably? Becky and Damian both finding that their beloved friend Anya was experimented on by rich influential people like their families, and now those same parents are trying to start war again? And what if Loid or Yor end up having to target Becky’s family as well, even killing one of them? I know that’s not the mission right now, as Loid is just working to get closer to Donovan to gain information, but who knows at this point. And then if that happens, imagine Anya reading her parents’ minds to find out that her best friend’s family is causing a war and she has to choose between saving Becky’s family and telling her parents about her telepathy, or just letting her parents save the world from a major military company causing mass destruction? I don’t know what direction Endo will go in specifically, if there’ll be a reveal like that to the kids, or anything at all in the future, but it would be very interesting to watch and probably way too dark for the tone of the show right now, but things are definitely getting darker, with the cruise ship arc and now the recent chapters. I’m really excited to see how it all unfolds, and if Becky and Damian will both reject their family names and legacies in the name of world peace.

#spy x family #sorry if this is badly written i'm so sleep deprived bc i'm in the middle of finals LMAO #but yeah i think we have so much to think about #so excited!#loid forger #yor forger #damian desmond #becky blackwell #anya forger #also i'm so confused about becky's name because in my physical copies of the manga it says blackwell but i was convinced it was blackbell #until very recently when i took a good look at my manga #anyways #angst potential???#rich kids breaking out of their families???#sign me up #sxf theory #donovan desmond #melinda desmond #fae actually posts something coherent for the first time in like ten years

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thekrows-nest · 5 months

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Huge wall of speculation incoming.

I have no idea if the OG! - Vamp! connection hinting at the mantra relates to stuff I’ve guessed at but hasn’t been publicly confirmed, or if it’s stuff that even I haven’t touched on.

Let’s see… let’s first go over what I do know.

The hunger is obvious.

OG Krow is notoriously food insecure and that’s where his organ harvesting side hustle comes in. His thirst for fluids… if you know you know. He’s also metaphorically ‘empty’ because he’s been so emotionally neglected and lonely. Also his job and the dog eat dog survival growing up may have desensitised him to a lot of emotions like guilt, empathy (for those who give a reason) or fear.

As well as being a really striking visual it makes sense with all of this for Vampire Krow to have a gaping void at his core, a ravening hunger and thirst, an empty belly and no heart. Traditional vetala also prefer to feed on intestines so there’s that too.

OG Krow is an artist, and creativity is his entire drive outside Dove. (It could be argued that as a muse who broke his art block, Dove is even an extension of that.) Maybe there is some of that remaining.

OG Krow loves music and has sensitive hearing.

OG Krow is clever and sneaky, easily underestimated.

OG Krow loves birds. Perhaps that can be used in some way.

OG Krow was/is homeless, hypervigilant, stealthy, has wonky sleep schedule but great physical stamina.

Vampire Krow may be tethered to one place or haunting abandoned places, but if he may have travelled to America he may have been cursed to wander. Or just have free will like most vamps. Or is being forced to move around to avoid being killed, or endlessly chase more prey. I don’t know.

I do know he doesn’t have an opulent mansion and probably doesn’t have a safe secure resting place. Vampire Krow doesn’t tire because he has nowhere safe to rest with other monsters hunting him and is always seeking the next meal. He can possibly be active night or day but might use stealth/night for easy meals if he still has enough sanity to not just charge in.

OG Krow is Bengali/Indian.

In the subcontinent it would reallllly suck for him if he was weak to the sun. Or garlic. Or superstition. Too easy.

You know what? Both Krows have freckles and OG Krow curls up in bed to stay warm (maybe that’s just his substandard accommodation). I headcanon that if Vampire Krow ever gets a moment of peace or if prey is unavailable he's sitting in the sun to get nice and dark or just not caring about it, he can barely feel the warmth but imagines it’s still a source of energy (prana) and maybe it warms his cold dead body. He tries to remember it from when he was alive.

Maybe he even uproots and crushes cloves of garlic into his mouth because the strong acrid flavour is the only thing that still registers, or eats it like a starving human eats grass.

Whoaaa… In some religious contexts Hindus may consider the strong odor of onions and garlic ‘impure’ and avoid them during sacred occasions or religious rituals. It is veg food though.

However like OG Krow he may not have been allowed to learn about Hindu beliefs. Despite having memories of life, having Hindu roots and being traumatized by colonization, I still don’t know what garlic means for Vampire Krow either way. If it’s good or bad. I’m going to say it’s not effective because it’s so well known against European vampires.

I don’t think Vampire Krow gives a single crap about crosses, or (if OG Krow had the religious upbringing I have brought up as a Krack theory) they may just make him angrier. This is a fairly traditional weakness anyway.

Krack theory… OG Krow as orphan or in foster care?

Part of living Vampire Krow’s trauma under occupation may have been being orphaned or taken from his parents for colonisers to raise.

I don’t think this is it as OG Krow is Bengali/Indian but there were also cases of British men siring children and returning overseas, abandoning mother and child to fend for themselves. Not a great position to be in in poverty, war, and famine… may have led to the loss of his mother or their separation.

This doesn’t square with him being turned as an adult unless there’s some device like slowly aging or he was just reaching age. But abuse of children of colour in ‘children’s homes’ was rife, mortality was high and covered up, and children were the favourite prey of traditional vetala. I actually have no idea how or why he was turned.

So. This is all I have so far.

Blind unreasoning hunger (greed), (bloodlust?) or rage may lead Vampire Krow into traps or destruction/capture by another monster. (Either Vishnu or Krishna said downfall comes through greed, lust or rage.)

Appeals to any remaining humanity may be somewhat helpful.

He may be bribed with… liquids. Or mangoes?

Water from the Ganges seems to be the equivalent of holy water.

Offers to braid his hair did seemed to give him pause. And marriage proposals? In Indian culture it can be inauspicious to have open (untied) hair and the attention and sensation of braiding might remind him of life. Or lust.

Perhaps Vampire Krow may be mesmerized by art or beauty. Perhaps he can be distracted by looking at or making mehndi.

Maybe he can be enthralled by music or given pause by loud sounds.

Maybe you have to be wary of him pretending to be trapped or enthralled, only to suddenly lunge.

He may pause to look at released birds, or stop to collect strewn feathers.

You cannot sneak up on him or outrun him as you will be taken unaware or tire before he does. I believe the term is persistence predator.

Krow mayyyy be weak to intense cold? Or at least not really like it.

Turmeric is an auspicious spice and to be avoided during mourning so maybe he’s weak to that? He may still be given momentary pause by Hindu taboos from when he was alive? Assuming he was allowed to learn about it.

He may have trauma from life around young ones being taken or hurt, and might be persuaded to spare babies or children.

As to the specific mantra relevant to OG Krow, I still don’t know. There may have to be some more lore drops before I even have the faintest hunch.

But I did look for mantras for abandoned babies and came up with another chant to Narasimha - then randomly stumbled on something interesting.

There was once a deva named Hiranyakashipu who sought the boon of invulnerability against most weapons and causes of death, and to become so strong that only Lord Vishnu could kill him. Beast, deva and man could not kill him, he could be killed neither at night or in the day, not inside nor outside, on the earth or in the sky, by weapons either living nor nonliving…

Then one day Hiranyakasipu had a grievance and sought to kill Narasimha (the fourth avatar of Vishnu). Hiranyakasipu was then attacked by Narasimha under the perfect conditions to circumvent it all.

Narasimha took a form that was part human and part animal, attacked Hiranyakasipu at twilight, and did it at the threshold to his house. Narasimha laid the deva on his own thighs (off the ground but not in the sky) and killed him by disembowelment with his claws.

Probably not why Vampire Krow is gutted but an interesting coincidence all the same.

So I’m guessing that Krow has a number of conditions under which he can’t be killed or at least things that won’t work, and so there may have to be some creative thinking, riddling and loophole abuse.

Vishnu/Narasimha also does seem to be the one to pray to for defense from demons or evil spirits.

Took a bit to get to this because my god what a novel that is this ask. /pos

I appreciate that you make me much more of a genius in character design than I really am Krowspiracy. /silly I guess it's one of those things that even if the creator didn't consciously go into a design with certain thoughts, it still subconsciously bleeds (ha) through. Maybe I still am a genius?

...New canon for Vampire Krow. He absolutely lounges in the sun whenever he does have a moment's peace. He probably doesn't really warm up any more, or really feel it, but, it's a moment to try and reflect back on when he was alive. To try and desperately still cling to what humanity he has left.

And no garlic isn't really effective one way or the other to Vampire Krow. The main thing for him is I wanted to get away from "traditional" (western) vampire weaknesses for him. He's not western, so why would those weaknesses apply to him? So someone trying to eat garlic or something as a means to ward him off are in for a nasty shock.

Crosses might not be a magical weakness to him, but they could still infuriate him as a possible reminder of British colonization. So in one sense, is a weakness, but not like how you'd think for a vampire.

I do like the idea that enthralling him with things of beauty is a means to at least give him pause (or even confuse him with unexpected kindness). There's so many stories of terrible beasts being tamed or thwarted or whatever when showing compassion to them instead of aggression. And that is a neat idea to have with Vampire Krow.

As for the specific mantra... I'll give a slight hint. It is to a specific deity but likely not who most would think of. And it does have to do with OG Krow lore. However, that lore hasn't been publicly revealed yet. (For you though, Krowspiracy, as a treat, I'll say you did pretty much nail what the lore was, more or less, in one of your theories.)

Pretty much for a mortal to kill him would require specific conditions I think (or well... basically nuke him sdfnmbdlf). A fellow supernatural would have an easier time killing him, albeit that doesn't necessarily mean they can accomplish the task.

#the krow's nest #krow asked and answered #winndy talks #vampire krow #krow different skies (au's)#krowspiracy theories

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lockandkeyhyena · 1 year

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What's hercules' relationship with his mother? It doesn't sound all that healthy but they seem to care about eachother

Yeah you pretty much hit the nail on the head lol. Titan was surprisingly not a completely horrible mother if you can get past the whole ‘raising your child to take over a crime syndicate for you and desensitising him to a lot of murder and bloodshed from an extremely young age’ thing. Understandable if you cant tbh.

She was around a lot despite being very busy, she involved him in fun bonding activities like learning how to dispose of a body properly and sitting in on interrogations. She never thought less of him because of his blindness, making sure to make proper accommodations for it (learning braille and getting him cane lessons) which is the bare minimum but is more than can be said for a lot of non-criminal parents.

Obviously Titan isn’t perfect and has many flaws that probably outweigh her virtues, specifically in regards to her relationship with her son. She doesn’t really have a perspective of what a proper childhood should look like given she didn’t really have one and defaults to treating him more like an employee than a son on many occasions.

There’s a lot of manipulation coming from both sides of the relationship, neither of the two of them would have any idea what a healthy relationship looked like if it hit them in the face.

They’re quite different people in a lot of respects and both have hangups with each other (Titan not being able to look her son in the eye sometimes because of how much he reminds her of his father and Hercules really really not caring for how materialistic his mother is) but they really do care for each other, even if they have strange ways of showing it sometimes.

#yeen art #ocs #sadboycats #hercules beetle #titan beetle #this summary feels somehow too all encompassing and not enough at the same time. oh well. i’m sure i’ll figure it out in the future #lots of stuff i didn’t elaborate on due to not wanting to write an entire novel about these two and not really knowing what sort of #specifics you guys would be interested in

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honeylikesyanderes · 11 months

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pros and cons of dating the yanderes pt. 2 (yandate edition)

not proofread-

was sick when i finished it so pardon me if it sucks

18+ mdni pls

this is kinda crack and kinda serious at the same time tbh

icarus

pros

can fly

is a pretty boy

loves flowers

loves giving gifts

has wine mom energy

is rich

has pretty eyes

loves giving you kisses and hugs

you get free stuff all the time from his winery

carries water for you when you go out in case you get dehydrated

always pays attention to everything you touch when you guys go shopping

cons

will gaslight you for no good reason

is toxic

may cuss out your parents just because

loves to cause chaos

favourite colour is bright orange.

doesn't like milk

can be a bit messy

doesn't like to clean up feathers from his wings that fall around the house

ren

pros

is a sweetheart

extremely supportive

likes kids

is loyal to a fault

would do anything for his mate

is affectionate

can cook

physically and biologically incapable of cheating on you

makes art for you all the time

likes to bake and cook for you all the time

packs lunch for you when you have to go to work

bakes you world-class cakes for your birthday, anniversary and any other important days to you

your parents/friends will love him

cons

likes to drink orange juice after brushing his teeth.

drew

pros

will do house chores without you asking

is a middle-aged cat in human form basically

will indulge you in your guilty pleasures

super tall so you'll always feel petite beside him

will always apologise when he's wrong

will always protect you

can and will talk you out of bad situations

has a lot of connections and is willing to use them to help you out

cons

is a lawyer.

is death and is therefore desensitised to death and other related matters

can't feel much emotions towards anyone that isnt you.

minor drinking problem (even tho he cant get drunk)

not super touchy or super sexual

atlas

pros

has a lot of money and influence

will always spoil you

overprotective of you

loves to read

will write you edgar allen poe type poetry

can teleport!!

will make good impressions with your parents/friends

will threaten your coworkers if they're mean to you

has nice horns

will buy you a custom gun because 'it'll look cute on you''

cons

will probably kill your exes (even if you guys are on good terms)

is triggered by specific colours

likes to put gin in his cereal

trust issues x30000

might become distant when he's going through a tough time

always carries a tiny alcohol flask with him everywhere (even tho he canonically cannot get drunk)

anger issues towards everyone that isnt you.

avanti

pros

always horny

has quite a bit of money

very cute and conventionally attractive

is a streamer and gamer

great with his hands/fingers

affectionate, fluffy and shy with you

will always flirt with you and keep your relationship interesting

has fluffy ears and tail

likes alternative music and is open-minded

very assertive and can communicate his needs/wants effectively

cons

may flirt with fans as fan service

just a flirty person in general

bad with boundaries sometimes

likes to lick you just because

is a cat demon fr

true demon form is super scary and you're not allowed to see

always horny.

doesn't like apple juice

#honey's anons #honey answers asks #yandere oc #male yandere #obsessive yandere #yandere #yandere headcanons #yandere scenarios #manipulative yandere #yandate #yandere dating app #my oc atlas #my oc ren #my oc drew #my oc icarus #my oc avanti

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danieesketches · 1 year

Photo

[MAY 2006]

‘And when they do, there’s an explosion of emotions. They talk and laugh and smile. They go see a movie, they go out for a meal, mobile phones allow them to take photos so easily and they have fun pulling stupid faces into the tiny lens, hands twisting awkwardly so the camera can actually focus on them.’

I’m not a writer, but after finishing Road 96 Mile 0, I had many emotions and decided to write a fanfic. I’m not the greatest writer out there, and I imagine there’s probably a fair few mistakes in this, but I had fun creating this.

More of my ramblings are below the keep reading line, along with the story. It became way longer than I imagined it would, but I hope you enjoy reading it, if you chose to do so!

[SPOILERS IN STORY AND AUTHOR NOTES BELOW]

Self indulgent Road 96 Mile 0 fanfic because the game was everything I hoped for it to be and more.

SPOILERS FOR MILE 0 AND ROAD 96 GOOD ENDINGS.

Also, there is swearing in this story.

This is set during and after the ending in which Kaito and his family are driving away to start their new lives. There is also some mentions of the Road 96 ending where Florres wins (specifically the ending where John, Fanny and Alex embrace one another).

I haven’t started the main Road 96 game yet though, so the knowledge of it I do have is based on playthrough bits I’ve seen on YouTube.

It’s somewhat mostly Kaito-centric but I do try to discuss his parents and a few other characters here and there.

In which life goes on and the years bring many changes.

The feeling of the night time breeze hit Kaito as he mindlessly gazed out the open window. The stars lined the sky for what seemed like endless miles and the view behind them got smaller and smaller.

Big Bear Rest Stop got smaller and smaller.

Petria got smaller and smaller.

Kaito could have screamed, he could have cried. Zoe had taken the file, but she’d finally know. She’d finally wake the fuck up and see he was right all along. Robert had been so close to finishing them all off there but something in the gun wielding man let them live, leaving with fake IDs, glances across their shoulder and hope.

Instead, he cleared the breath he’d lodged into his throat and whispered “I love you both.” to his parents. He’s nearly lost them so many times, but he hasn’t told them how much they mean to him. How he’s sorry he’s been so angry that he’s not let them know he can still feel love without it being at the expense of hurting someone else.

He sees his mom and dad smile. Tired smiles, but for once they seem to have a light in their eyes. Like maybe something good is ahead.

“We love you too Kaito.” Anzu smiles. “Now get some rest, we have a while to go.”

For the first time in longer than he realises, he knows he’ll sleep maybe peacefully as opposed to the often mild resentment.

The car takes them to a place that isn’t quite a town, village or city. More like a pit stop kind of area just after the border, enough places to look around but not exactly somewhere you’d settle down for the remainder of your life.

It’s small, quiet and far from the shitty work dormitory. Daw looks over at his sleeping wife and son and is thankful to whatever higher power exists that he lives another day to see them flourish.

He’d long been desensitised to the awful treatment from the upperclass toward the poorer folk of Petria. Having moved there with his wife during its early days of the past dictatorship, they’d managed to get by easily enough as long as they kept their mouths shut and just did what they were told. But then the old leadership was overthrown by Tyrak and everything went from bad to worse.

When Anzu found out they were expecting Kaito, she and her husband had been living in a small apartment at the time, but supporting a baby and yourself was not easy with their wages, so Daw took it upon himself to take as many jobs as he could so Anzu could rest during her maternity.

Their neighbours at the time had been the loveliest older couple they could ever call friends. The Johnsons had seen Petria in many of its forms. Their own lives had not been a walk in the park there, but things went onward and got manageable. Malcolm, the husband, was a crossword enthusiast but didn’t always like reading the contents of the newspapers he bought for puzzles. Abigail, the wife, was short but absolutely loved to wear a bright pink cardigan and green flowery bag whenever she wasn’t working.

They had been a staple support, Abigail coming around to check up on Anzu when Daw and Malcolm weren’t available. She’d bring around some jam and crackers and gently spoke. Malcolm helped them insulate their apartment windows and put reflective foil behind their main room radiator so they’d be a bit warmer when it got colder.

Daw was a silent man. He didn’t argue with authority. He just did as he was told, even when his boss was a pretentious 20 something year old whose manager status was entirely down to nepotism. Daw cleaned streets, wiped windows, trimmed hedges, painted walls. You name it, he’d probably done it.

Long hours, mediocre pay, but if it meant his wife didn’t have to worry or suffer, he’d do it a thousand times over.

Kaito was born on February 17th,1980. He’d cried so much and held so tightly onto the fabric of his mother’s nightdress. Daw had been afraid to hold him too roughly but Anzu had placed the restless infant in his arms and immediately, the fear was replaced by a strive to make sure his son and wife never had to worry.

In the very far distance of White Sands, fireworks had been set off for some other party, but Anzu and Daw saw those as a joyous cry out to welcome their baby boy into the world.

As time went on, Daw was heartbroken to see the consequences of not being able to keep his promise. Kaito was 14 when Aya passed away and he was 15 when he dropped out of high school to help his parents out when they ended up being evicted from their old apartment.

He’d done so with a smile, but Daw knew when his son was lying and would never admit to seeing the resentment he cast at the rich folk who’d look at workers as if they were scum.

Times like these, he missed the Johnsons. He regrets 1986 happening. He hoped they didn’t suffer.

Anzu did the speaking at the motel front desk. John had given them an envelope of cash along with a note reading the address to this place.

“Tell the front desk Mr Ursus recommended you stay here. That’ll help things run smoothly. This should cover you for a bit.” The trucker has advised them before heading on his own way.

The bearded Brigade had been right too. Front desk had them sign a month lease and gave them the keys to a room. The rate worked out fairly even to the worker dorm rent. The envelope had held a combination of their savings they had slowly put away over the course of 6 years and a little extra that John had added.

The room was one main room decorated with a double bed and single bed separated by a desk with a lamp, another desk, a tiny mini fridge and a wardrobe. An iron and a kettle were sat on the bigger table. Through a door was the bathroom which was plain but had a cupboard above the sink for storing things in.

It was big and small all at once, but for now it was home. So clad with only a few bags of clothes and the odd trinket between them, they wiped down surfaces with some wipes and set to getting accustomed to all of this.

“It’s so big.” Kaito mused. For the first time in a long time, all of them would be guaranteed to sleep in a bed for every night the family stayed here.

For the first three days, tiredness had taken hold of the Lin family far more than expected. To the point they’d maybe been awake for 5 hours of each day. Almost like they were chasing away years of burdens. By day four, they needed to eat an actual meal instead of a couple crackers.

Front desk had lead them to a room they could use for cooking. $5 fee per person, per use, so the family decided only one would cook in there while the others would take the food to their room.

The first proper meal they sat down to eat was rice with some veggies they’d gotten from the convenience store. Their fridge however had many sandwiches wrapped in cling film, a bag of apples, a bottle of diet cola and some instant noodles.

And it, in Anzu’s opinion, was the best meal she’d had in ages.

Maybe this little motel could be home for a while longer.

After their first week of staying together and slowly adjusting to now being known as the Chen family, the trio enquired to the front desk clerk about employment within that area. And would luck have it, the motel was considering hiring more help with some tasks like the laundry and housecleaning.

With the promise of things that sounded too good to be true (alright hours, alright payrate, heavily discounted accommodation and a $3 discount in the utilities rooms) the trio were responsible for things like the cleaning of the rooms, laundry and making the exterior look nice. They worked at different hours but usually two were working the same shift, leaving the third to their own devices.

“Not to worry, if Ursus sent you here, it’s the least I can do.” The woman smiled a cheeky grin before pulling out a sheet of paper to jot down their names and place them into their respective shifts.

Paychecks were given every two weeks and Kaito nearly choked when he saw they’d each gotten $60. Last time they’d gotten something even close to that was when management had been feeling generous (probably trying to be eligible for some weird tax loophole) one Christmas and gave everyone a bonus as a treat. It was only ever the once that happened though.

While his parents had work that day, Kaito had two days off and so he decided that he would treat his parents to dinner. The convenience store clerk was bored reading a magazine. Kaito felt weird as he tried to decide between which pasta sauce he wanted to try. The mini basket on his arm already had a huge bag of fusilli alongside some milk powder and a box of cereal.

Deciding on a plain tomato one, he took the items to be paid for when he glanced a packet of plain biscuits on the stand by him. And for the first time ever, he didn’t cringe when he saw they cost nearly a dollar.

Anzu and Daw are asleep in their bed when Kaito creeps out of the room to sit on the porch steps outside. In his hand he has a mug of water and a few biscuits on a napkin. He just sits and watches the world go by. Rarely does a car drive past tonight and here he is in pyjamas with midnight snacks, feeling the weight of the past three weeks.

Petria feels like forever ago and not long enough. He’s woken up each day and not felt like he’s going to lose his shit and tear down Tyrak posters. Thankfully this place is very ‘no politics mentioned’ (at least in attitude) so he doesn’t particularly have to consider the implications that anyone around him may want to sing praises for that shithead.

If they’re going to feel that way, they should stay silent.

The stars aren’t as bright tonight. But the skies are peaceful. He knows that if he were to stand in the middle of the road, he’d see Mount National closer than he could from the roof he and Zoe once sat at. Picking a biscuit to chew on, he pauses and places it down.

“Fucking hell.” He mumbles and draws himself close. Tears pool and are blotted away by the sleeve of his top. “fucking hell.” He repeats.

Because his family is not rich; but here he is. A warm bed, a job he doesn’t particularly hate his manager at and he just bought a pack of fucking biscuits because he saw them and decided why not? He feels like they’re finally winning something. Maybe not a huge something but there’s something.

“I know son. I know.” His mother whispers lovingly as she takes a seat next to him and brings him in for a hug. It’s been so long since she heard her son cry, even more so for reasons not affiliated with the brutal reality of what being poor poor was like.

Daw watched the scene from the door. For the first time in a while, all three of them had the next day free and so he decided he’d see if there happened to be any crossword books in the little shop.

“I’m sure you’d be proud, Johnsons.” The older man smiled.

The store has crossword books. Daw buys a handful of them.

They haven’t gotten around to talking about everything they went through, and for a while, they probably won’t. But that’s for their future.

By July, Kaito and his family take a trip to the town a 15 minute drive away from their accommodation. They’ve been putting bits of money down here and there and that’s just as well because after the past two months of a better diet and a steady enough routine, Kaito finds that his old clothes fit slightly closer on him than they used to be. His face wasn’t so gaunt anymore either, one might say he didn’t immediately look like seething death.

Their family had never had a reason to spend above their means, so on a sleepy summer morning, the trio are looking at items in a small charity shop. Amidst her collection of clothing, Anzu saw a lovely green top with flowers on it that reminded her of the bag Abigail had once owned and cherished.

Daw picked up a few Hawaiian shirts and a little fishing hat to add to his collection of one. The work back in Petria may have been gruelling but the hat he wore everyday was a comfort to him. It has been a gift Kaito had acquired for him (the younger never did reveal how he found or got the hat).

Kaito, however, had a bit of different styles in his hand. He had a couple plain tops, a pair of jeans and a couple pairs of trousers, however he also had a bright green and orange colour block shirt and a t-shirt that seemed to be for some band called Metallica.

By the time they get back, Kaito and Daw head back out to start their respective shifts cleaning the vacant rooms and sorting out the laundry load. Anzu sets to carefully removing the price stickers on the clothes and separating them accordingly to get them washed while the machines were free.

Charity shops weren’t a huge thing back in Petria, but when they were, the price of stuff was outrageous to even be considered charity.

Sat in the little room with only her thoughts, she absentmindedly listens to the radio talk about things like some pop group’s upcoming concert in Philadelphia or a new vacuum going on sale. And as the washing machine thrums, she finds herself calm.

Routine, Kaito learns over time, is nice. The solid structure of expecting to do something one day and another thing on another is working wonders for him. He carries a little year planner and in it he has his work shift hours written and any reminders he needs to note.

He starts thinking about the gaps in times he has on some weeks. How he remembers his days used to be fairly sporadic after he dropped out of high school. Sometimes he’d be delivering newspapers, others he’d be hanging out with Zoe- before all the need to get out was a thing.

Petria doesn’t become much of a topic of conversation for any of them, though he’s sure at some point his family is going to need to talk about this to someone. He also doesn’t hear about it on the radio stations or TV in the reception area. It’s frightening, like it cut itself off from the world. Beyond those walls was a hellscape.

This motel area isn’t perfect by any means, but it’s a thousand times better than where they ran away from and that in itself makes it almost like a heaven of some sorts.

Kaito wasn’t sure how long they’d be staying here after they renewed their lease for the fifth time. He was starting to wonder what was beyond this beyond.

Donning a pair of rubber gloves, Kaito sets to cleaning the utilities area of any food stains, bits of rubbish and dust that may be accumulating. As he scrubs and sprays surface cleaner, the clerk (god, what was her name?) came rushing in to him and quietly beckoned him to come into the back room.

His parents are in the room, eyes glued to the TV when they see it. The newscaster is discussing some documents that have been given to them, recording how the 1986 Peak Collapse was caused not by the Black Brigades but rather Tyrak and his government. Kaito finds himself unable to speak. And as the story progresses, they hear how the dictator had been arrested for his crimes, how Senator Florres won her election campaign and pledged to make amends with many of the citizens of Petria and break down barriers set by the corrupt class system and its equally awful upholders.

“Holy shit.” His father swore. Kaito didn’t know the man even knew how to swear. Learn something new every day.

“I imagine you guys will want some time to process this. Finish up what you’re doing now and take the rest of the night off.” The woman, whom Kaito notices has a name tag saying ‘Arlene’ speaks softly to the boy before she walks into another smaller connecting room to take a call.

The family turn to one another. This day, this day that they could never imagined would happen, had indeed happened.

“Go on Kaito.” Anzu looked ready to burst into tears, her hands shook in her husband’s and she hunched over to take a deep breath. Kaito looked over at her, and wrapped his arms around her and his dad before agreeing and leaving.

In the smaller private room with only a filing cabinet, a yellow radio and a landline, Arlene dials a number she’s committed to memory but still keeps a post it note for. The phone line rings out and nobody takes the call, so she hangs up and just stands there.

Right now she wants to speak to John. Wants to tell him it’s all been worth it, to say thank you for what he and Conny and Stephen and Naomi had done for her all those years ago.

See, she knew what the deal with people that came to her establishment per recommendation of Mr Ursus was. Having been a Brigade as long as she was, she knew what it was like to be scared and looking for a new life.

The dictatorships of Petria had turned what could have been a good place to live into a nightmare for the reserved many.

The Brigades in their early days helped her get out, but she couldn’t bring herself to completely abandon her roots. Something about the hope John had for the future for many had drawn her to staying as a contact for the cause.

This motel had been abandoned when she took it under her wing for dirt cheap from a businessman desperate to get it sold off. And it had taken some time and perseverance, but things were going in such a way that they could keep the business running.

She was happy to spend a while longer here, until there was a guarantee that Tyrak and those alike could never ruin Petria as much as it already had been. And she’d use this place to help those John brought to her.

She’d give them employment as their new self, something to have a reference of for when they spread their wings and flew out of the nest. Rule number one, everyone gets a second chance at life. Rule number two, whoever you were before you came to her was irrelevant.

Arlene takes a deep breath and takes hold of the radio, putting it in one of the black plastic bags she always keeps in the cabinet. Tonight she is celebrating, she’s not sure how, but she is. Once night shift comes in; she’ll let them know the good news if they haven’t already heard.

When Kaito returns home, there are grapes and strawberries in one bowl and a huge serving of pasta and sauce in another. There’s also a bottle of cider on the desk that he nearly asks about but his mother smiles “Arlene is very kind.”

As Kaito cheekily asks if he is included in the kindness, Anzu follows up with “maybe our kindness, but not hers.” And the younger realises that’s the first time in a long time that he has heard his mom make a joke (though he knows she’s completely serious).

They eat happily that evening, and still have a nicely stocked fridge for the next few days. Tyrak is hopefully suffering tremendously and people might not have to sneak out of Petria anymore.

Kaito finds himself a little bitter that his family had to worry for so long only for a few months later to bring new hope. Only a little though. Kaito Lin was born in poverty, raised in poverty and saw people’s darkness far too often. Kaito Lin can rest easy now and Kaito Chen will carry on for him.

Maybe that, in itself, is the greatest gift he can receive.

And if the Chen family smile a little more often as they work the days after, well that’s not for Arlene to judge.

It was late September when Daw and Anzu were finishing their shifts when they saw her in the lobby. Zoe Muller, but not as they remembered her. Now she seemed different, not just because of the piercings and tattoo, but something about her seemed knowing right now. And she must have recognised the duo too because Arlene looked between the trio, lingering on the Chen’s as if to ask if they needed her to do something.

When Daw greeted Zoe with a simple “hello. You are looking well.” Arlene figured they might be okay, and left to go take care of some paperwork, sliding a set of keys to Zoe and taking a few dollar bills into the back room.

Zoe was at a slight loss for words seeing Daw and Anzu in attire that wasn’t the blue Petria workers uniform. They looked content in their grey sweats and plain tops. She took a moment to compose herself and approached the duo, keeping a slight distance between them as if she were afraid they’d reject her.

“I-I. I’m sorry.” She spologises.

“We know.” Daw comments. Kaito had told them what happened when they got into the car after Robert’s hissy fit.

“If you wish to see Kaito, he will likely be around. He likes the view on the porch steps.”

Zoe nods, fear and elation caught in her throat. She hadn’t expected the Lin family to be here. She knows John mentioned having a contact running a motel, but what were the odds of this one being the exact one that her best friend and his family would go to?

“I’d like that.” She smiles. She lets them leave first just as Arlene returns to the front and gives her a knowing look.

“Got some catching up to do or apologisin’?”

“Yes.” Zoe notes, and leaves. Arlene chuckles to herself, wondering what on earth John would say to all of this.

Kaito was wearing a green and orange shirt when Zoe saw him sitting on one of the remaining plastic chairs at the foot of the porch. She couldn’t tell if he was sat outside his own room or not but there he was.

He seemed at peace, a crossword book in his hand and a pencil in the other.

“K?” The nickname seems foreign on her tongue. And when the boy turns to her, he can’t help but take in Zoe’s appearance. Eyebrow and numerous lobe piercings, shorter hair and the bird tattoo she’d once had him trace was now permanent ink.

“Z?” he doesn’t seem to quite believe his eyes, setting down the book and standing up to properly determine he wasn’t imagining things.

“Can I sit?” she motions to the porch space next to him. He nods, and then they realise that they’re not the same teens they were a few months ago.

“You got that tattoo eh?” Kaito motions to her shoulder. She’s taken aback. There doesn’t seem to be animosity in his voice. And his eyes aren’t analysing or glaring. In fact, the boy before her is what she imagines Kaito would have been like if his life in Petria had been different.

His dimples are more prominent too, and here he is. As real as can be.

“You were right K. you were always right, and I was so wrong, and-“

“I know.” He muses.

Kaito neither forgive Zoe, nor did he not forgive her. It was a grey area of understanding and knowing that everyone was hurting. Granted he wished they’d left on better terms, but it is what it is and they’re here now.

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.” Kaito finishes. “I’m sorry too. For hurting you back then.”

Zoe forgave Kaito the moment she read the file, but in the spirit of the conversation, she made that vocal and while it wasn’t an immediate patch up of their friendship, it was a start.

“So how are things? I saw the news.” The raven haired boy asks as they stare at each other, noting changes here and there. “Florres won.”

“Yeah, she did. People decided change needed to be given a chance. She’s mild, but she’ll need to be strong to keep her promises. She has potential.”

“Well if the footage of the riots is anything to go by, I think she’ll be desperate to prevent being on the receiving end of that.” Kaito mused, but the way he looked at her said there were unsaid things.

“And how are you?” he went with.

“Depends. There’s a lot of things happening all at once. I think I should give you full disclosure that technically I may or may not be a Brigade…” Zoe starts off and the look Kaito gives her is frozen in the shock. It’s not mouth open, jaw on the floor but the way his eyes nearly pop out of his skull and he whispers “you fucking what?” certainly say something.

“You were right K. The government were lying the whole time. It was the only way I’d have the means to get the story out there!”

“You could have gotten hurt or worse.” Kaito harshly reminded her. “You’re not indestructible.”

“Maybe! But if it meant other people didn’t have to say goodbye to their loved ones, it was worth the risk!” Zoe slammed her hand on the porch floor. “The worst thing I ever did was not saying goodbye to you and I’m not letting anyone else go through that.”

The eighteen year old watched her backpack topple onto its side, the trombone and skates tied to it made a noise. Her friend? Ex-friend? Best friend? Looked at the stuff with something akin to yearning. It had be a while since he skated around.

“You know, the field over there isn’t too sandy.” Kaito stood up and walked behind him into the room. For a few minutes, Zoe wasn’t sure what he was planning until he came out in plainer clothes with his board tucked under his arm.

“Bear in mind, I’m a little out of practice.” Kaito quickly defends, and Zoe’s relieved. “But is now the time for skating?” she’s hesitant to say all is forgiven just yet.

“Was it ever the time for skating back there?” he shrugs. “…unless someone’s out there chasing you?” he eyes her and she shakes her head. Most- if not all- authorities are too busy trying to gain public forgiveness or repair the extensive damage of the past three weeks of rioting.

“Unpack your stuff and let’s go!”

Not all has been forgotten or forgiven, but it’s one step at a time.

It’s coming to the end of the summer of 1999 when the Chen family make a huge decision to leave the motel and head further up. They’ve made some good memories in this small unassuming area and found many an interesting store in the town up ahead, but they’re ready to spread their wings and fly.

Arlene sits them down in her backroom office to say goodbye. A litre bottle of some flavoured water and some crisps are in a little carrier bag that she shuffles over to them. “You three have been real good company here, I’ll miss y’all. You promise to take care, you hear me?”

Anzu smiled and takes her hand to shake it. “We will. Thank you, for everything you’ve done for us. We truly can’t thank you enough.”

Arlene waves her hand. “Nonsense, you just be sure to live a happy life however you can. Don’t go becoming assholes though; I’ll never forgive you for that.” She cackles. She knows they’re good people at heart. This world ain’t made to be easy if you’re too kind, but after what they’ve been through, she’s sure they’ll figure something out.

“As long as I’m here, this place will always be open for you. Just ask for Arlie.” Arlie is a nickname she let’s an absolute select few use. Most are Brigades but the people they send to her get to share that privilege if she sees fit.

(What she doesn’t mention explicitly is how she added a little extra to their final paychecks, nor does she mention the post it note with her number on it. A smile is scrawled in the bottom corner and a tiny ‘be safe!’ written with it. She really wants them to do well, as she does all who are sent to her).

Kaito asks Arlene to let Zoe know that they’re leaving. He’s not sure where though.

“Yeah, the baby birds are finally flying the coop.” Arlene feels like a mother hen watching her kids move out. “Kaito wanted me to let you know that much. Somewhere beyond here. He’ll figure it out.”

It’s early the next morning when the family have their boxes and bags filled and they make their way out of the parking lot. There’s a gas station in the little town up ahead, so they stop there to fill up the car and extra gas can they have in the boot. Mount National is further behind them than it was before. Daw keeps driving. The family decided that they’ll stay in one of the towns further on their journey.

The place itself is within the Western Sea side of the map called Anamesa. It’s a fair distance away from the seaside town of Thalassa; so the cost of living isn’t too bad. Not as cheap as the motel afforded them, but you could see something for what you spent.

They live in their car while paperwork is sorted out for the little two bed house they choose.

It’s a humble house, in need of some care though. The back garden is covered in weeds and dandelions, inside the paint is chipped in places and the only furnishings remaining of the old tenants in the house are the wardrobe in one bedroom, a dull white washing machine and a brown leather sofa that creaked when you sat on it. (They definitely did not get their deposit back).

But this is their fourth home. And they love it already.

(Daw finds a phone booth a few roads away and calls the number on the now found note to wish Arlene well and let her know they’re settling in as best they can).

Finding work takes some time, so they try to get many affairs sorted like opening bank accounts, getting registered to vote in the area and all that. The phone booth did not know what hit it. They live very frugally for the time being until some full time cleaning jobs open up and Anzu and Daw go for them. Arlene giving them both a glowing set of references when she receives the call from the employment agency, practically tells them they’re lucky the Chen’s want to work for them because they were so good to Arlene’s business.

The probation period of the job lasts three months, so the duo make sure they’re present on time at every shift, even if the hours they’re away from home are very long. It’s somewhat lonely for Kaito who uses his sudden free time to sort out things at home like clearing the back garden and trying to find his own feet, searching through numerous newspaper ads for what this place has to offer.

As of December 1999, that is working as a kitchen porter for a fast food place.

It’s then in the Friday newspaper in January of 2000 when Daw mentions to Kaito that he saw an ad in a paper detailing how to apply for GED examinations. His mother and father have a high school education and they wanted to make sure he had as much of a foundation in life as he could.

They didn’t tiger parent him about it, but did express they’d never been able to forgive themselves for being the reason Kaito dropped out when he had a good head on his shoulders and could use it. Kaito doesn’t argue with them, but he does try to dilute their feelings of guilt by mentioning how the school was probably going to close anyway after the Vice Principal was arrested for having Brigade affiliations.

(It’s true. Well, except for the school closing. Tyrak just dumped a heap of his goons there to make sure people kept silent about any anti-government slander. Everyone hated everyone there. Who knows if the place does even still exist by now).

So Kaito does as the newspaper says. His mom got a landline phone with the first paycheck she got for that month and he calls the number to register his interest. He’ll need to take a couple tests so they can determine if he would be eligible for the programme with any chance of passing at the end. Hopefully work won’t be arses about him needing to switch his hours. (They kind of are, but they don’t fire him so he guesses it’s a win?)

Daw used his pay on the monthly rent and the utilities while Anzu focused on things like necessities and getting their house slowly done up. Kaito would often buy some bits of food, but his parents urged him to make sure he was saving bits away (and had any necessary text books he’d need for his studies).

Kaito passes his pre-study exams and is accepted onto the programme. The cost of the programme is not at all as daunting as he’d imagined it to be, but he dips into the small savings fund he’d assembled from his motel cleaning wages, promising himself to put it back over the year.

The library is an hour away, so Kaito decides to get all the books he can in the one sitting and gets a library card sorted while he’s there. (He’s amazed at how real the fake IDs are and wonders whether Robert had some dirt on someone in the profession. Even the birth certificates are frighteningly real… though the fact the only differences on them to his genuine documents is the family surname and very minor details is funny to him in some respects).

Maybe he ought to consider some home workouts. The books were heavy, but the librarian was at least 20 years older than him and wielded them without fuss.

One year passes and by the time it’s May of 2001, not only does Kaito pass the GED examinations, but his Walkman kicks the bucket after four years of faithful use. Mp3 players are coming into the market, but their price tag are a little steep for his liking, so he finds a little shop on the high street and gets a second hand one for $90 dollars. (It lasts a year and a half).

Thankfully, some other things the Chen’s have acquired over that time are lasting way longer. The dressers and the bed bases are holding up well, as is the TV. Pretty much all of their furniture is from a charity stores around the town, the only exception to the rule is the mattresses on their beds. Anzu never trusted second hand fabric focused upholstery because of how easily germs could settle inside it and you wouldn’t know.

It’s why all their furniture can be wiped or in the very least is water resistant.

Daw and Anzu work early mornings and sometimes a few hours in the evenings, so they don’t have forever to sit around and take in the sights, but one of the rare times their rota means they work bulk hours over a few days, they use their time off to sit in the garden with a couple cheap beers in hand and watch the sun slowly dip down over the hours. Today, they decide that the day can be lazy. Dinner isn’t anything huge, just a bowl of pasta and sauce.

Kaito returns home from work with some fries from work and for some reason, a handful of the little toys usually included in the kid’s meals.

“They just looked goofy.” He shrugs. “And they were getting rid of them because of the new theme or something.”

The little toys sit on his windowsill in the corner and remain there for many years to come until Kaito takes his own next step in life and moves into a little studio apartment.

As more years pass, it’s soon May 2006. Ten years since they fled Petria.

Anzu and Daw remain working with the agency that hired them in ’99, however they move house as one closer to some hiking fields becomes available. Kaito goes from kitchen porter to hotel receptionist for a small chain. The hours are slightly under full time, but it gives him enough to pay his bills, he has some small tattoos too. Nothing major- just lineart of Mount National on his left clavicle and a skateboard on his inner arm.

He has a few friends too; or at least people he talks to enough. They’re kind. He doesn’t tell them a great deal about himself other than things he’s learned about himself post-1996 and that his family moved there after finding themselves in awe with the fields. It’s partly true.

He gets a TV, a Playstation 2 and a mobile phone (though to be fair, he gets them on a monthly credit pay back plan so it’s not a huge chunk of luxurious spending in one go). He gets Arlene’s phone number from his family so he can call her, because he’s mature enough now to independently put into words his gratitude to her and to John. The number still leads to her, her voice is heavy with smoking and age, but the smile in her voice is just as prominent as it was years ago. She’s happy to let Kaito know that Mr Ursus found love in his life. She also mentions a few things she’s learned over time.

“I think I got a couple years left here before I try fly the coop, if I’m bein’ honest with you.”

“For real?”

“Yeah. Florres seems to be doing okay enough at her job; Petria isn’t as huge a shitshow nowadays. It still has a lot of progress to make, but democracy is doing its best. I ain’t movin’ down there though. Been there, done that- got the t-shirt. I wanna see what life’s got to offer elsewhere.”

Arlene is smiling on the phone as she looks at a few leaflets she has for different places to visit beyond the border. People come and go out of this place, they want to see the Petria of the news stories or they’re finally visiting away from there. She’s got a good team of people. She’s thinking of turning ownership over to her night shift lot, maybe expanding this place to other areas. Who knows?

Kaito runs a hand through his shorter hair and inhales through his teeth to ask “Have you heard from Zoe?” last they saw each other was when they both ran into the plains opposite the motel to skate. Kaito still has his board too. Sometimes he regrets not continuing using it, he’s pretty sure his balance is shot to shit and he’d fall if he tried to use it, but he keeps it as a memory.

On a plus side, he knows for a fact he could carry those GED textbooks without complaining if the situation called for it.

“A while back. She sounds well in herself. I can pass along your details to her if you want. She’s probably travelling at the moment.”

Kaito nods. “That’d be nice. Thanks.”

“Don’t sweat it kid. You keep yourself well, pop down here if you can. We still got some good cola.”

“Aha, I’ll try. I won’t promise though. But if you do decide to go travelling, come up to Anamesa. We got good beers here.”

“Oh my god. You’re still a baby, why are you drinking?”

“I’m 26.”

“You’ll always be a baby to me.” Arlene pauses. “Keep yourself well Kaito. Your parents are proud of you. I hope you’re proud of them.”

“I am. I really am. Thanks. See you later!”

“Good. Take care!” Arlene hangs up.

A month later, Kaito receives a text message.

‘It’s Zoe! Call me!”

And he does. And he hears how the years have deepened her voice slightly, but her experiences have humbled it.

They decide to meet up that week.

And when they do, there’s an explosion of emotions. They talk and laugh and smile. They go see a movie, they go out for a meal, mobile phones allow them to take photos so easily and they have fun pulling stupid faces into the tiny lens, hands twisting awkwardly so the camera can actually focus on them.

She offers to stay in a hotel so she can stay in Anamesa a while longer, but he offers her his apartment. So they get some snacks and drinks and they act like the apartment is their old construction yard hideout. Kaito has a few games so they hook them up and joke about things and it’s all just amazing.

Zoe thinks that they needed to be adults to be able to do this, that the pain of their parting ways was too fresh in the 90s. Time didn’t erase what happened; it just put a few things into perspective.

Her style has changed slightly again. Her hair remains shoulder length and loose, but she also has some blonde highlights in her bangs. She still has her eyebrow piercing and the numerous ones in her lobes, all adorning purple earrings; however the addition of a new nose piercing is also noticed.

Kaito knows she has more tattoos, though the only bit he’s seen to indicate that is a few stars he saw on her lower arm. She’s long abandoned her full on ripped alien top- punk skater girl look and gone for a white tank, blue denim jacket and green ¾ khakis.

Kaito wouldn’t particularly say his own sense of style was all that different from his youth, granted he owned more formal clothing now (shirts, and a couple trousers and a blazer). Most of his clothes were plain black for his job, but outside of that, he was mostly a comfortable clothes kind of guy. And none of them had holes in them.

They’re playing one of the Street Fighter games and Kaito is getting his ass kicked for the fifth time in a row when he makes a request.

“What if we went on a road trip?”

“Hmn?” Zoe’s turned to him but is still button mashing and Kaito considers knocking it out of her hand so he can land a few hits in. He chose not to because of maturity and shit, but he pauses it and that’s just as good.

“You know, rent a car and go out on the roads for a week in summer. See what else there is to this place?” last time he said something similar was in relation to escaping Petria, but this idea is about enjoying life. Making memories. His life here is amazing, but he wants to see more things.

Zoe seems to take a few minutes to ponder the idea and Kaito regrets even asking until the woman asks if he can drive and if he has the time. Because while she personally does, what with working as a freelance travel writer and pretty much funding her life with the savings fund she’d transferred into an entirely separate bank (the privilege of her rich upbringing, she’d not lie); it feels only fair for her to check he’s in a comfortable position to do so.

“I have plenty of remaining hours. Only have a few days booked for use so far.” He shrugged.

Zoe nodded wordlessly as she considered the idea. She vaguely remembered the last time Kaito had said something similar back in White Sands, back when it had been hidden with the intention of fleeing a terrible place.

“Zoe?” Kaito quietly asks and she blinks a few times, straightening her back before her expression relaxes and she nods at him. “I don’t think I can say no to that.” She smiles, holding up her can of beer for a toast. And as the night continues on, Kaito offers her his bed but she opts for the sofa. He has an early start the next morning, but finishes after lunch so they can talk about other stuff when he gets back.

Zoe was awake when Kaito left out for work at quarter past five. Leaving his keys on the side after unlocking the door, he waves her a “later Z!” and she returns it with a “later K!”

The sun was bright even at its early rising, the heat wasn’t yet unbearable. And as Kaito sat on the bus to work, he truly felt like he had what he’d yearned for most in life.

A lot of elements of this are based on Google searches for things that were applicable to America in the specific years I mention during this story. I may not have all the details correct, so I apologise for any mistakes I may have made.

I didn’t know whether their new IDs would change their names completely, partially or just different details instead, so I chose to only change the family surname, any other details that could/would be changed are down to your interpretation.

Arlene was not a character I thought I’d write about in this as much as I did, but she grew on me.

In respect to Thalassa and Anamesa; I searched Petria’s meaning online and the first result I got said it was the Greek word for ‘rock’. Following that, I decided to find the word for ‘sea’ (thus Thalassa and it being a seaside town) and Anamesa is noted as an adverb meaning ‘between’ (and I wanted it to be placed in between a bunch of other towns/cities).

Also an extra I wanted to include but Kaito definitely got his tattoos done by an apprentice artist (based entirely on my first tattoo being done by an apprentice).

Maybe things have been unrealistic in this story, but I love happy endings. I’m not the best writer out there, but I had a lot of fun writing this. It became way longer than I had in mind but it is what it is.

#road 96 #road 96 mile 0 #r96:m0 #road 96 zoe #road 96 kaito #zoe muller #kaito lin #road 96 fanfic #danieesketches

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pharahsgf · 2 years

Note

i get that some of jc's attitude towards jl is supposed to be taken as him just being a cantankerous cunt but i think that even with that reading, fans miss the point that his attitude isn't cute or harmless. the framing of the scenes where jc berates jl; the music, the expressions wwx makes, the undercurrent of genuine fear/emotional pain on wwx's part, give the atmosphere a tense, heavy, almost awkward weight. jc threatening to whip jl w zidian (even IF both parties did know that would never happen) hits different when we've seen wwx be abused by that weapon. and knowing anything about jc's character at all, tells me it's not something he would joke about either nor something he would say lightly (the scene where he does it certainly doesn't feel jokey or light). whether he would actually do it or not, the intention of that threat is to intimidate jl. on a very base level, to instinctively threaten physical harm (even IFFF jc never "actually" did it) is pretty fucked up actually. and while jl is "comfortable enough" to talk back, mostly his response is actually to run away. and then there's that time where jl flinches back at the end, which he doesn't even do when he's about to be cut in half in the temple--it's either a trained or an instinctive reaction! also, the only other time we see that posture is when wwx is putting his hands up to protect himself from being hit. it's so uncomfortable and like the only semi-sympathetic reasoning is that jc wanted jl to be a little afraid of him and cultivated that fear through verbal threats and an outward lack of concern for jl's person. he probably does genuinely love jl and maybe he never actually followed through (the fact that this is extremely debatable doesn't look GREAT) but even so the results of his hand in jl's guardianship shows in how unhappy and dysfunctional jl is before wwx steps in and literally just goes "hey...i care about you and maybe if you were nicer you could have friends and be happier" and i haven't even gotten INTO jc encouraging jl to be violent towards others at the slightest provocation. how does no one talk about this

also just to add onto the last ask about jl and jc's relationship being a clusterfuck, isn't it weird how even before jl knows "mxy" is wwx, he doesn't bat an eye at jc whipping him in the street, surrounding him with swords, and taking him up to his room to be tortured/killed??? like this is just a thing jc DOES?? HELLO?

oh lmao i talk about this all the time but i'm literally not joking when i say jiang cheng is 100% responsible for jin ling lacking of any sense of self-preservation or humane thought processing in the face of genuine compassion from other people. like ofc jin ling was bound to suffer growing up in such a predatory environment without his parents but jiang cheng seemingly took zero steps to alleviate this and instead encouraged jin ling to center his identity around a tragedy he can't even remember, damaging jin ling's self-perception and ability to connect with peers just for the sake of validating his own grudges and individual trauma.

following wwx and jyl's deaths there is no one left to temper jiang cheng's reliance on physical violence so i'm sure he sees it as an accomplishment that he "only" defaults to threatening jin ling with harsh corporal punishment at the slightest provocation, but in reality he bullies and scares jin ling who nearly gets himself killed for the chance to gain a sliver of respect from one of his closest relatives. and that's not even touching upon jin ling's desensitised view of the violent assault repeatedly carried out by jiang cheng and how that may inform his opinion on how jiang cheng treats HIM

like there is so much shit about jin ling and jiang cheng's relationship that goes completely unaddressed so ppl can feel good about calling jiang cheng a dilf or whatever. jin ling's first scene literally has him trying to murder a visibly scared stranger just because jiang cheng told him to but it's clear we'll never be able to have a conversation about what the fuck was going on there because half the people on here will only acknowledge jin ling's existence to celebrate jiang cheng for selflessly raising his sister's baby despite the (checks notes) 5 seperate scenes where he beats the kid

#replies #anonymous #child abuse #jc hate blog #long post #this entire topic makes me so mad but 'cantankerous cunt' anon. osidnvdjs

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seraphtrevs · 1 year

Note

regarding chuck having a son, i can see it worsening his already terrible state in canon if the son is like jimmy (impulsive, rule breaking, almost desensitised to being scolded by chuck). like, especially if the son withdraws from a relationship with chuck as an adult but stays close with jimmy. it feels like another cruel jab from jimmy. everyone close to chuck loves jimmy more. his parents, his wife, his son. while in reality jimmy is probably the one jumping to chuck's defense (in the beginning) when his nephew is ranting about chuck to him. on the other hand i think it's also possible that having a son could tether chuck to reality somewhat more especially at the end of s3. like idk. an obstacle to committing suicide? provided their relationship isnt on the rocks or worsened recently

It would absolutely add to Chuck's Jimmy complex - turning even his own child against him! But Jimmy would always tell his nephew/niece that his dad is just looking out for him and he should do what he says. Of course, Chuck would assume he's training him in his slippin' ways, which I really don't think Jimmy would do. He feels very ambivalent about being slippin' jimmy - he wouldn't want any kid following in his footsteps

I think it goes without saying that Jimmy would love Chuck's kids so so so much - I don't think Jimmy wants kids for himself (too much responsibility) but I do think he likes them

It's hard to say how it would have affected Chuck's condition, bc I think there's a pretty good chance he doesn't get EHS in that timeline, which I believe he developed our of a response to feeling abandoned when his mother passed away and Rebecca left him.

If Chuck and Rebecca had kids, Rebecca almost certainly wouldn't be a touring musician, which means they likely wouldn't have divorced. And even if they did divorce, having kids means that Rebecca would have remained nearby. (Unless she fucked off to tour anyway leaving Chuck a single dad, but that seems SO out of character from what little we know of Rebecca.) And I agree he would be more reluctant to commit suicide if he had a son or daughter. A big part of Chuck's suicide was that he had driven his brother away for good, leaving him completely alone.

But let's say that Rebecca and Chuck get divorced after the kid(s) are grown so she can tour, like she did in canon, and Chuck still develops EHS. I think it's a lot more likely that Rebecca finds out sooner because I think Jimmy would contact his kids when Chuck was hospitalized the first time, although I'm sure Chuck would beg him not to. Jimmy was really uncomfortable making those decisions for Chuck - it makes sense to me he would want to keep them in the loop, while he didn't feel as obligated to Rebecca. So since the kid(s) would find out, Rebecca would find out, and Chuck would have people other than Jimmy encouraging him to get help.

#the brothers mcgill #chuck mcgill #jimmy mcgill #better call saul #asks

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hazbinbossbrainrot · 2 years

Text

🎵 Octavia of the Ars Goetia 🎵

VOs:

• Barrett Wilbert Weed (primarily)

• Juliana Sada (young)

Currently

(As a child)

Canon theme song:

Non canon theme song:

Nationality: English 🇬🇧 (standard)

Species: Demon (owl)

Human - disguised (not yet learnt)

Sexuality: Asexual (aromantic)

* Not confirmed yet

Age: 17 years old

Sex: Female

Occupation:

• Ars Goetia Royalty

* Royal heir

AU:

• Retailer at Stylish Occult

• Assassin for I.M.P

Likes:

• Going to Loo Loo Land (as a child)

• Spending time with her dad

• Going to Stylish Occult

• Depressing punk music

• Collecting taxidermy

• Reading books

• Astrology

* Witnessing Astaroth’s Tears meteor shower

DISLIKES:

• Her father flirting with Blitz

* Her father’s infidelity

* Blitz himself

(Possibly because she thinks Stolas was the reason her family is ruined and tearing apart)

• Her father’s overprotectiveness

• Her father leaving her

• Her parents fighting

• Robo Fizz

• Rip-offs

* Loo Loo Land (as an adult)

Fate (AU):

*Disowned by her Stella

* Stolas gets full custody of his daughter

* Seeks comfort from Blitz, as a second parent figure and gets a pretty cool girlfriend to hang out with

Strength:

• Desensitised to aggression >> which probably would make it ideal for her to work at I.M.P

Flaws:

• Adulterous father

* Reason: because Stolas doesn’t love Stella (the feeling is mutual) and is gay and also because he needs to getaway from his (ex) wife’s constant abuse

• Abusive mother

* Octavia and Stella’s relationship is not known enough to confirm whether she is abusive to just Stolas alone or is extended to their daughter as well (but a different form of abuse, NOT exactly the same as her dad’s, because he would be very protective of the former and probably put a halt to it, saying that his wife can do whatever she wants to him but leave Octavia out of it)

Abuse:

• Child neglect (theory)

* Stella refused to console her daughter as a child from her nightmare and also didn’t seem all that concerned when Octavia — as a teenager — went to the human world

(At least not as much as Stolas after she nicked his grimoire via I.M.P — all throughout 2x02 — and actually succeeded in bringing her back home. The closest thing Stella probably did to maternity afterwards, was lecture Octavia about her behaviour saying that wasn’t how “princess’s acted” by running away when things got bad or something she disliked)

• Emotionally abused (theory >>> plausible)

* Stella will (probably) do everything in her power to have Octavia be on her side and go AGAINST Stolas by saying untruthful things about him and hope to taint their familial relationship just to take away the happiness of spending time with his daughter

• Runaway

* This had happened nearly three times now — by the time 2x12 comes out — and every time it had, it was always Stolitz related (okay, maybe except for 2x02), but she was still dejected from Stolas being, allegedly, “too busy” for her, just because he was more focused on having Stella’s belongings moved out

To be fair I’d do the same thing too, if I was him, if the woman had abused me for 17 years straight and finally had the guts to stand up to her. I’d want her OUT the next day.

I mean, come on, Octavia, pick a certain TIME and a PLACE, you could clearly see your dad was in the middle of something (which he couldn’t have dropped right at that minute just to do whatever she wanted to do) and yet Stolas gets the hate for it, just because “he didn’t attend to his daughter straight away and neglected her”

If you think about it… Stolas partially decided to divorce Stella and have her moved out for himself and Octavia’s sake, just so his daughter didn’t have to put up with her parents arguing (and the violence & cruelty towards her father)

• Broken home (split parents)

* TBA - THE DIVORCE ™️ is pretty much coming whether Octavia’s ready for it or not

(And probably has to deal with an inevitable stepdad — after a couple a months of dating her dad, at the end of S2, which is confirmed, and the start of S3 — in the future, namely, Blitz)

• Abandonment issues

* Octavia is so scared of Stolas is going to “leave her behind and run away with Blitz where she can’t follow” (as quoted in 1x02 “Loo Loo Land”)

____________________________________

Family:

Mother: Stella of the Ars Goetia

Father: Stolas of the Ars Goetia

Extended family:

(Paternal) Grandfather: King Paimon of the Ars Goetia

(Paternal) Grandmother: Queen Octavia (Sr) of the Ars Goetia (✝️)

Numerous of (paternal) aunts and uncles.

(maternal) grandmother: Unnamed

(maternal) grandfather: Unnamed

Uncle: Marquis Andrealphus

AU:

(paternal 2) step-grandfather: Cash Buckzo

(paternal 2) step-aunt: Barbie Wire

(step) Father: Blitz

(adoptive/step) Sister: Loona

(half) Sister: T.J. of the Ars Goetia

RP 1#: (Tixel)

• Axel x T.J. = Tixel

1# Brother-in-law: Rimon Shiv (TBA)

Nephew: Shiv AKA “Vish” Shiv

Niece: Azrael Shiv

2# Brother-in-law: Axel of the Ars Goetia

Nephew: Axel “A.J.” Junior of the Ars Goetia

Deadname: Angel

Niece: Abria of the Ars Goetia

• Pronounced: “Aria”

* The “b” is silent

• Her vampiric name is “Ria”

* the “a” and “b” is silent

(half) Brother: Nikolas Buckzo-Mayday

RP 2# (Sterosika)

• Stuart x Verosika = Sterosika

Brother-in-law: Asmodeus (engaged to T.J. in exchange for information about the father of her child)

Niece: Hope of the Ars Goetia (✝️)

Status: Miscarried

RP 3# (Blitzika)

Blitz x Verosika = Blitzika (Before breakup)

(biological) Father: Stolas of the Ars Goetia (✝️)

(adoptive) Grandmother: Verushka Mayday

(adoptive) Grandfather: King Asmodeus (?)

(adoptive) Mother: Verosika Mayday (RP)

(adoptive) Aunt: Barbie Wire

(adoptive) Sister: Loona Buckzo

(adoptive) Father: Blitz Bucko-Mayday

• If Stolas died in the ‘Chaos Gods’ war’ and had asked Blitz to adopt his daughter, to avoid Octavia being in custody of Stella

(adoptive) Sister: Tilla Mayday (an alternative version of T.J. the Stolitz hybrid but still honouring Blitz’s late mother)

(adoptive) Brother: Astaroth Mayday (in honour of Astaroth of everything he had done for “Blitzika”

(adoptive) Sister: Evika Mayday

(adoptive) Mother: Chloe Lovelace Buckzo(Alt 😈)

(adoptive) Sister: Siria Lovelace-Buckzo

Note: the “a” is silent 🤣

(adoptive) Grandmother: Carmen Lovelace

(adoptive) Grandfather: Ruben Lovelace

(adoptive) Aunt: Mirabelle Lovelace

(adoptive) Aunt: Jocelyn Lovelace

Other:

(half) Sister: T.J. of the Ars Goetia (ceases to exist since Stolas had died which alternates the timeline of her existence)

Status: Daemon Prince of the Chaos Gods 😈

• Became estranged with her since she was the one who “killed” Stolas

(illegitimate) Brother: Runt (Stella x Striker’s offspring)

(2# paternal) (step) Grandmother: Tilla (✝️)

Other: (I.M.P)

“Work (step) uncle & aunt” : Moxxie & Millie

Other(s):

Loona (acquainted >>> 2x02)

* But their conversation already had a sister vibe to it

Employees of I.M.P >>> M&M (acquainted)

Brennon Ragers (accidental victim)

Asmodeus (acquainted)

Unnamed family butler

Unnamed bodyguards

RP:

• Vortex (brother-in-law)

* through Loona being married to him

• Dom (friend)

• Alastor

• Loona

• Charlie

_____________________________________

Enemies:

Robo-Fizz (one sided)

AU:

Marchioness Stella

_____________________________________

Nicknames:

• Egg (by Stella)

* obliquely mentioned in front of Stella’s so called “friends” in 2x01, when she was talking about how she was glad she had Octavia, so she stop pretending to want to have sex with Stolas because of the obligation to have a precautionary heir to the Goetia family

• Princess (By Stolas)

* Darling (paternally)

* My Owlet

* Starfire

• Via (by Stolas and Blitz)

• Via (by Andrealpus)

• Sweetie (by Blitz)

AU:

• The Emo Looking One (by T.J.)

* Tavia

* Sissy

• V(ee) (by Loona)

* Tia

• Kid/kiddo (by Blitz)

and other paternalistic endearments like “honey, sweetie, sweetheart” etc

* Little Miss Runaway

Much to Stolas’s annoyance, even if it is true; I mean Octavia HAD run away, not twice, but nearly three — by the time 2x12 airs — times when it’s Stolitz related

* OG (Octavia Goetia for short 😂)

* Octavia (serious)

* Firestarter

* Octagon

* Octopus

_____________________________________

Abilities:

Natural:

• Flexible Head - due to her being an owl she can turn her head around

• Witticisms (RP) - can make quick and clever comebacks just like her father

Unique:

• Pyrokinesis - Octavia can snap her fingers and produce small purple flame from the tip of her finger

• Spellcasting

Other:

• Availability to Stolas’s, duties, legions, and assets

* This is stated by Andrealpus; that if Stolas dies his inheritance will NOT go to Stella and instead it will go to Octavia since she is his precautionary heir

(However I have a funny feeling that if this did happen Stella / Andrealpus would lock Octavia out of the account by lying to her that in Stolas’s will I said that everything that he owned goes to THEM and not his daughter)

_____________________________________

Appearance / personality:

Octavia is an adolescent avian demon. She is lanky and unkempt, with a coat of gray feathers. Her eyes are also pink with bright white pupils, while below each of her eyes are two tear-like streaks.

She bears traits from both of her parents: she has her father's white mask-like face and light pupils, with her mother's shaggy, scruffy hair feathers.

Octavia wears a pink glittery dress with stars on it, a dark feather shawl around her shoulders, pink arm warmers with stars and black boots

Accessories:

She also wears a pink choker around her neck and she wears black beanie hat with a pale yellow tiara design on it

Note: Whenever embarrassed she normally pulls the hat over her face

(As a child)

Octavia’s hair was shorter and messier with a lighter gray and white tips at the end of it.

Her hands were also black and wore the same pink glittery dress with white stars on it, but the sleeves were puffy and white. She also didn’t wear any shoes and sometimes wore her tiara

How would you describe Octavia’s personality?

• Broken-hearted >>> 2x02 when Octavia really thought that all Stolas cared about was fighting with her mother more than he loved his daughter

• Accusatory towards Stolas for “taking (antidepressant) pills just to deal with her” in 2x12

* Most likely influenced by Stella and the (emotional) manipulative lies behind it

• Cocky (as seen in the episode “Loo Loo Land” when confronting the mascot on the rip off theme park “Loo Loo World”)

• Temperamental >>> 2x02

* When she was “rejected” by Stolas just because whe he was occupied with other stuff

• Disapproving & emotional (especially when it comes to her father and anything Blitz related)

• Desensitised (from her parents argumentative behaviour in front of her)

• Embarrassed

• Banter (RP)

• Pessimistic

• Sarcastic

• Cynical

• Private

• Moody

Other:

• Fearful (ongoing); this anxiety of Octavia’s began to manifest in her childhood, but progressively became more prominent after Stolas started his affair with Blitz had started

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Trivia:

• In the episode “Loo Loo Land” as an owlet Octavia only had a drawing of herself and her father only and not her mother

* This probably means she has a stronger connection with Stolas — must do since she actually wants to associate with him — considering Stella refused to console a young Octavia who just had a nightmare

• In 2x02 I suspect that Octavia will probably put Loona in a “sister role” — something she never got to have as a child — in their inevitable friendship 🥹

• In 2x02 Octavia’s Sinstagram's username is “gothchk17” which fits in with her identity; fashion (goth), age & the slang term for 'chick'

• Striker mentioned Octavia to Stolas in 2x04; meaning he’s familiar with her

• In the upcoming episode 2x12 Octavia will accuse Stolas of taking antidepressants — that had NOTHING to do with his depression in having a daughter by the way — just to “deal with her” (and, surprise, surprise, she runs away again, for what is the third time now)

#heiress of ars goetia #barrett wilbert weed #character bio #octavia #helluva boss #Spotify #via #juliana sada

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alycosworld · 3 years

Note

guess who🤡 heyhey 💕 here. I’m pretty sure by this 2nd request u can tell that I’m a very emotional person🧍🏻‍♀️ and that I’m a person that seeks alot of comfort from fictional characters because i dont have a life and good friends.

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putting a divider here so u dont have to read everything and can look out for keywords!

purple—> person

pink—>genre

green—>subject

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I’m not sure if u r comfy writing kazuha so if yr not I’m sorry u can ignore this! i just want a fluff comfort for reader who got like REALLY scolded for getting bad grades for exams because u have no idea how angsty I’m feeling rn:( my parents just literally like scolded me like there was no tmr istg- so i just need really fluff comfort. so a kazuha x NB(non bibary)!reader

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Anyways again tysm u have no idea how grateful i am if you accept my request!!!<3 get lots of rest and drink water. only do this if you want to!

byebye<3

-💕

Kazuha's Wise and Whimsical Words

Kaedehara Kazuha X Reader

A/N: aaaa 💕anon ily!! being emotional is completely fine and I would be honoured to become of your good friends!! I will be a part of your life, private message me if you're ever feeling down! I just want my readers happy because they make me happy aaaaaa 🥺

with that being said, i love this request! My parents were so hard on me when it came to exams, but as soon as I broke away from their expectations, I started to appreciate my grades more. I'll leave the real comforting words for Kazuha to say but NO ONE SHOULD EVER be disappointed in yourself if you tried your best. Thank you for your support and the request, I hope the story makes you feel better. Enjoy!

ps: I took into account the fact that not everyone has a mother and a father and not everyone has two parents at all, so only one parent is mentioned here and they are left gender neutral so it's easier to picture yourself in the story.

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"(Y/N). This is not at all what I expected. What happened to you?" Your parent asked sternly.

"Well, I--"

"I don't want to hear any excuses. Your predicted grades were much higher than this!" They said, raising their voice.

"I'm sorry, I--"

"Sorry is not going to improve your results! Do you really think that now is a good time to be slacking off? You have one more exam period before university. I don't care if you pass those exams, I want you to excel. And if you don't, you are not attending Sumeru Academia, whether they accept you or not. I am not paying for you to study overseas, only for you to get mediocre grades." They said, making you even more anxious than before the exam.

"But I got above the average!"

"By two percent! And the average was low." Your parent said, narrowing their eyes slightly and upsetting you with their belittling gaze.

"Realistically--"

"Realistically? Realistically?! If you want to study realistically, you should find someone else to pay for your education. When you want to study successfully, you can come back." They slammed the stack of sheets that displayed your results on the table with a loud bang before folding their arms as you grabbed a jacket and stormed out of the house, tears running down your face.

You walked for a while in the night, before eventually finding yourself in an area you were less familiar with. After recognising it to be somewhere near your boyfriend's current residence off Beidou's ship, you made a beeline for his place, knocking on the door and hoping, praying he would be alone inside.

The door soon opened and Kazuha stood there, initially with a smile on his face but it soon dropped when he saw your expression.

"(Y/N)? What happened?" He asked.

"C-can I come inside?" You sniffled.

"Of course, Love. Come in." He said, ushering you into his quaint little place. You stood by the door that closed behind you before Kazuha pushed the coat you had lazily draped over your shoulder onto the floor and enveloped you in his arms.

You broke down in his embrace. You had done better than most of your fellow students, and frankly, you were kind of proud of your result. But it was foolish of you to think that your parent would accept anything but perfection. They said it was all for you, but you were doubting it. Did you even want to go to Sumeru Academia? You had had your heart set on it since you were a child, but maybe that was only because your folks always envisioned you going there.

"Why are you crying, my love?" Kazuha asked, sitting you down near the fire to warm you up and standing up to get you a blanket and a hot cup of tea.

"I'm not good enough." You mumbled. If it was anyone else, they wouldn't have heard you. But your boyfriend could listen to the wind "talk" - he was very attuned to quiet and subtle noises.

"Nonsense." He smiled, bringing you the blanket as you listened to the water boil in the background.

"You're more than good enough. Everyone who knows you adores you - no one more than me, of course." Kazuha chuckled, eventually setting down two cups of tea and sitting in front of you on the floor.

"Public opinion won't improve my grades." You said, now more stoic than upset. You had almost become numb and desensitised to degrading comments that after you cried a little and calmed down, you'd be straight-faced and almost emotionless. It didn't feel good, but it was certainly better than feeling bad.

"So this is about school." Kazuha nodded, gesturing for you to continue explaining why had happened.

"They keep talking about my grades. They said I shouldn't be slacking and that I'm not going to get to Sumeru Academia and that they want me to do better...maybe I'm interpreting it wrong. Maybe they're trying to encourage me?" You wondered aloud, thinking that somehow you were the problem. As soon as you said "they", Kazuha knew who you are referring to and sighed.

"Encouragement and doubt are two very different things. Unrealistic expectations, detrimental practices, emotionally, mentally or physically taxing improvement - none of that is going to help you. In fact, it'll make you feel worse. When you really think about what you have to do to achieve perfection, you'll only realise how unattainable it is. You'll fall into a perpetual spiral of intellectual destruction." Kazuha said.

"Then how the hell am I gonna get the best results?" You asked worriedly.

"You won't. No one will ever get the best results because more people and more previously unforeseen factors will come into play. What you can achieve is your best results. Your grades are a product of you, not the other way around. They are no measure of your worth, they cannot define you, and they do not have to be a part of you. If you don't ace one subject, you don't have to hang on to that or turn it into some strange part of you. You can't cling to it, it's impossible to cling to a piece of the past forever. That's not to say you don't learn from it, but it doesn't need to become some villainous trait - in the end, it is only a grade." Kazuha shield at you. His words warmed your heart more than the fire or tea, and they even seemed to dry your tears and allow you to mirror his expression.

"And at the very least, you can hold your head high knowing that you had the strength to participate in an exam when not everyone does. You went in, sat through it, attempted the questions and walked out. Not everyone has the courage to stay; some don't even have the courage to start. That goes for any endeavour you face." Kazuha said, before inching closer to you.

"Feeling any better?" He asked. You nodded instantly. Of course, Kazuha's wise and whimsical words had bettered your mood, it was Kazuha for Archon's sake.

"Good. Maybe we could go for an evening stroll? I'll treat you to dinner if you haven't eaten." He offered.

"Can...can we just stay like this for a little longer? I think being alone with you is nicer." You smiled.

"Of course, Angel. Anything you want."

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this was less physical fluff than I intended, but I think I do comfort with direct words and dialogue best, so I hope this is okay. honestly, everything kasha said is what I would've wished to hear when I was in this situation. I'll probably post a rant about my own exam experiences because this request got all my past feelings to resurface.

thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed!

#kazuha #genshin #kaedehara kazuha #kazuha kaedehara #genshin impact #genshin kazuha #genshin x reader #genshin x y/n #genshin x you #kasha fluff #fluff comfort #comfort #kazuha comfort #non-binary reader #kazuha x reader #kazuha x you #kazuha x y/n

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chibimyumi · 3 years

Note

@thedarkestcrow and a few others have gotten questions about the end of Kuro. The presumption is the final conflict will be between O!C and Sebastian. Many theorize that it will revolve around O!C’s desire to live or not, possibly with his living/reanimated family and friends begging him to escape Sebastian. Of course, even if O!C decides he wants to leave, Sebastian will demand his payment. My question to you is do you think O!C might change his mind about the contract and his will to live?

Dear Anon,

First of all, my thanks for your sweet words ^^

Now, about your question. Very interesting! I myself don’t do prediction theories though; it involves too much guessing based on too little information and too many variables for me to find it comfortable. That’s why I only do analyses of things that have already happened. So I am not sure how much I can help you here ≽▽≼ so my blog might be less amazing to you now, I’m so sorry.

Though, I can use your proposal as a hypothesis and analyse it. This will not be a predictive post, simply a deduction through logic within a hypothesis.

Hypothesis: Undertaker uses Bizarre Phantomhive Dolls to bait O!Ciel into giving up on his contract. Q: “might O!Ciel change his mind about the contract and his will to live?”

Personally I think it is fairly unlikely a zombie-family can cause O!Ciel’s resolve to waver because it is simply too strong.

Character Study

Most human beings who experience (sudden) loss need quite some time to process this information before reaching the stage of “acceptance”. Our boy however, already easily withstood a supernatural being’s positive response about reviving the dead even before he could actually process anything. Most people would not believe a human if they made the same offer, but wished it were true. But if a clearly powerful supernatural appeared before you, that’s a different story; who knows what magic potential they possess?

じゃあ、死んだ人間を生き返らせることは？

Jaa, shinda ningen wo ikikaeraseru koto wa?

And, what about bringing dead humans back to life?

O!Ciel was the one who brought this topic up. Judging from the clear-cut language and lack of emotional markers, it is arguable he said so not because he hoped it were possible, but because he knows it is impossible, and therefore wanted to test the demon’s truthfulness.

Sebastian took the bait, and therewith O!Ciel knew he’d have to strategically use his first wish to seal off the demon’s potential of lying. (Ugh he’s so smart!) O!Ciel’s swiftness in rejecting the demon’s temptation is evidence that he had already fully accepted that what is dead, stays dead.

Discussing Hypothesis

So, knowing O!Ciel has this level of acceptance, how would it play out IF Undertaker does attempt to lure O!Ciel with his revived family?

Had Undertaker really wanted the best chance at making O!Ciel fall for the temptation, he would have to not have exposed the boy to his creations so often. He has seen the in-between stages of reviving the dead, and therefore knows exactly what they are: Just decaying meat manipulated by a lunatic. Being met with the sudden appearance of seemingly flawless living-dead family would no longer be something new to O!Ciel, so it won’t have the advantage of a “pleasant surprise” to him.

O!Ciel is a very clever boy who thinks very clearly as long as he’s allowed the space in his head. So the best way to bait him into making a poor decision would be to disorient or overwhelm him with shocking new information, like at the end of the Circus Arc.

However, shock value is something that declines with every exposure. Now that O!Ciel is already so used to seeing Bizarre Dolls, and every time these zombies just get more and more advanced, he’d know it’s only a matter of time before these Dolls could become basically fully sentient, like his brother did.

Yes, he was very shocked to see R!Ciel back, but if we pay attention he was not so much concerned about his body being resurrected, but what threat R!Ciel’s return would pose to his own position now exposed as ‘the impostor’. Should Undertaker also “revive” his dead parents to try tempt the boy into reuniting with his family, then O!Ciel would be desensitised already by that time. He’d have had too much time to be mentally prepared. Besides, especially after seeing R!Ciel who is the biggest threat nothing would overwhelm him more anymore. You cannot shock somebody twice using the same trick; especially not if the second one is a lesser threat. It would be akin to bad film sequels that over-analyse the success of the original and use the formula of “more = better” to appease audiences.

In this sense, I personally reason that considering how Undertaker has been working so far, he would probably not try to make O!Ciel do a 180 through manipulation; that tactic simply leaves too much space for failure. Also, manipulation does not really seem Undertaker’s M.O.; that’s Sebas’ thing. Undertaker prefers cornering somebody, forcing them to bend eventually – i.e. use ‘hard-power’ instead of ‘soft’, like he did with Sebas on the Campania and at Weston.

How should Undertaker have acted to make the hypothesis work?

If we do go along with the hypothesis that Undertaker does want to use soft-power to get O!Ciel, he had better done things like this:

During the Campania Undertaker had indeed not expected the boy there, fine! That would have been an accident, as well as a competent way of storytelling to inform O!Ciel and the audience that clearly somebody is doing something big, and that Undertaker is not 100% in control of everything.

IF! I were the Undertaker in that situation AND I plan to bait O!Ciel with his “revived” family, I would never have revealed myself to be a reaper, and instead denied any responsibility for the bizarre dolls. Rian Stoker was fully convinced he had worked the disastrous “miracle” anyway, and there is no better scapegoat than one who truly believes himself guilty. Plus, he was scheduled to die anyway. If the scapegoat could just die in an accident caused indirectly by his own doing, the cover-story would have been beyond perfect.

Before Undertaker revealed himself, O!Ciel trusted Undertaker as an ally, and even went to him for sensitive information on which he based his entire job for the Queen. O!Ciel is naturally untrusting, but Undertaker did win that trust, and that should have been too valuable a weapon not to keep. By revealing himself to be an antagonistic and powerful being who mortally wounded O!Ciel’s main security (Sebas), Undertaker proved himself to be untrustworthy.

Now that O!Ciel can no longer trust Undertaker in the slightest, what effect would it have if this untrustworthy lunatic were to try bait him? I find it unlikely that O!Ciel would be stupid enough to take the bait, and Undertaker stupid enough to believe O!Ciel might after all this.

In short, for this hypothesis to work on the naturally untrusting O!Ciel, Undertaker would have needed to:

keep O!Ciel’s trust,

have the advantage of a ‘pleasant surprise’ on his side,

any credibility that his walking-flesh are “really alive”.

I hope this had been interesting ( ´ o｀) Good day to you, Anon ^^

Follow up post: What would O!Ciel do if Undertaker tried to bait O!Ciel with Bizarre Phantomhives?

#Kuroshitsujit #Undertaker #Finale #O!Ciel #theory #character study #Bizarre Dolls #R!Ciel #this is NOT a predictive post!!! Just analysing the potentials of a hypothesis!!!

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nineteenninety-six · 4 years

Note

Could I request some angst of the Shelby boys coming back from the war only to be told that their baby sister (Finns twin or maybe younger, whichever your prefer) is dying of the Spanish flu

I changed my mind about how this would end about midway through writing it lol

TAG LIST: @futuristicslimemongerbanana @dayna041101 @captivatedbycillianmurphy @sweetgoodangel @shadow-of-wonder

WC:2126

It’s Too Early To Say Goodbye

When Tommy and his brothers stepped off of the train at Small Heath station, they expected to see their aunt and younger siblings, ecstatic to see them after so long but they were only greeted by Ada and Finn, who looked happy to see them but were also weighed down by something.

They instantly knew something was wrong and they felt out of place as their fellow soldiers reunited with their family, the tears of joy and screams of happiness of the people around them turned into muffled background noise as they approached their brother and sister.

Finn ran ahead and leapt in Arthur’s arms, the eldest Shelby brother easily holding the ten-year-olds weight and Ada ran into John’s arms when they got closer. There wasn’t a dry eye between them as they reunited with each other but eventually, the elephant in the room had to be talked about.

“Ada, where’s Polly and (Y/N)?” Tommy asked

Ada seemed to shudder before she looked around at the crowd around them, “Let’s get out of here first and then I’ll tell you.”

The eldest Shelby brothers looked at each other in confusion but followed as she left the station and to a quiet place around the corner. Finn was back in Arthur’s arms and had buried his head in Arthur’s neck, hands tightly clenching his shirt.

“(Y/N) has the Spanish flu…” Ada quickly began to cry as she talked about her younger sister, “Polly’s with her now, didn’t want to leave her alone.”

Tommy stared at his sister in shock before he suddenly brushed past his siblings and rushed home, not even bothering to wait for them, his mind focused on his little sister.

(Y/N) was closer to a daughter than a sister to Tommy. She and Finn were twins, (Y/N) younger by a few hours and when their mother suddenly died a few years after their birth, Tommy had taken the role of a parent for them. Arthur, with the occasional help from Polly, looked after John and Ada and he and Tommy had to find ways to support their family. Their father was a deadbeat, so it was left to two young men, barely out of their teens to support and provide for the family.

Tommy and (Y/N) had a special bond, and it was no secret they were each other’s favourite sibling but (Y/N) was six when Tommy left and now four years later, Tommy wondered if they were still going to be each other’s favourites since so much had happened and so much time had passed-if (Y/N) survives that is.

As soon as he opened the door to the house on Watery Lane, Tommy threw his bag to the side, not caring where it landed and thundered up the stairs. Polly met him on the landing and while her eyes watered at the sight of him, she knew it wasn’t the time for a reunion. Tommy’s thoughts were only on (Y/N).

“Don’t get too close, Tommy.” His aunt warned him and Tommy gave her a weak nod in understanding before he slipped past her and into the room.

The sight Tommy was greeted with was the first thing to make him feel sick in over three years. Tommy thought France had desensitised him, he had gotten used to the sight and smell of death, he had walked past countless of dead and dying men, there were even times where he walked over them, in the tunnels in France he no longer feared death and had even expected it but the sight in front of him struck a new fear in him.

(Y/N) was placed in the middle of the bed, a light blanket was thrown over her so that she didn’t overheat but Tommy could see how she was soaked in sweat.

Tommy made his way over to her, his heart racing and his mouth dry, the sight of her looking so poorly and helpless made him want to cry and he felt himself tear up as he pulled her hand out from under the blanket and tightly gripped it in his.

(Y/N) stirred from the movement and blinked warily at him, “Aunt Pol…?”

“It’s me, princess. It’s Tommy.”

(Y/N) merely blinked some more before she drifted back off to sleep.

Tommy could hear the loud stomps from his brothers as they climbed the stairs and moments later the door quietly opened and they shuffled in. He didn’t turn around to face them, only focused on (Y/N), though he heard Arthur’s muttered ‘Jesus Christ’ and John’s whispered ‘Fuck’. They moved to the end of the bed and looked at their baby sister with sad eyes but they didn’t dare to get any closer.

“I know you this is not what you wanted to come home to and that you probably wanted to celebrate but this has to be brief, I can’t afford anyone else getting sick” Polly told them as she slipped inside with a bowl of water and some rags, “Especially not you John, you need to care for your kids.”

Arthur and John nodded, giving their baby sister one last pity filled stare before leaving but Tommy remained.

“Tommy-“

“I’m not leaving Polly” Tommy interrupted whatever his aunt was going to say.

Polly sighed, “Then you can help me then. Pat her down and keep her cool with the wet cloth and I’ll make her some soup. Hopefully, she eats.”

Tommy harshly swallowed and nodded, taking the bowl from his aunt and soaking the cloth before ringing it out and dabbing it on (Y/N)’s forehead.

Polly lingered by the door, not yet leaving, “She dips in and out of sleep a lot, you should talk to her. She missed you a lot and I bet your voice will comfort her.”

Tommy nodded but didn’t speak until he heard her going downstairs.

“I missed you, princess” Tommy murmured after a few moments, “I missed you so much but your parts in the letters helped me a lot. I think I can recite all of them from memory now, considering the number of times I re-read them.”

Tommy continued to cool her down with the rag, brushing it over her arms and chest, “Don’t tell anyone but I missed you the most.”

(Y/N) shifted slightly causing Tommy to freeze in his place but once it was obvious she was still asleep he continued.

“At one point, I was more afraid to come back and have you not recognise or remember me than I was to die.” He confessed, “You were so young when I left, still basically a little kid and I didn’t want to leave you, I hope you know that.”

As Tommy got carried away talking openly and patting her down, he missed how (Y/N) slowly blinked her eyes open and how she tiredly stared at him

“Tom?” She croaked, her throat dry.

Tommy whipped his head up when she said his name and even though he knew he shouldn’t, he climbed onto the bed and pulled the ten-year-old into his arms, pulling her tightly against him. (Y/N) didn’t seem to be bothered that she had been suddenly dragged into an awkward position as she weakly wrapped her arms around Tommy.

Tommy started to cry, too much was happening at once, he was still suffering from the war, he was finally back home and his baby sister is deathly sick and he couldn’t stop the tears.

“Hello, princess” Tommy pulled back and gently laid her back down in the bed as she wasn’t in the clear yet.

Tommy helped her sip the water that Polly had left out before he laid down next to her on the bed not wanting to move away even for a bit. He pulled her close to him, frowning at the heat that was radiating from her body before soaking the cloth back up and patting her face with it.

“I’ve missed you.” (Y/N) murmured.

Tommy smiled at her, “I missed you too and when you get better, we’ll go horseriding, okay?”

(Y/N) smiled back at him, excitement lighting up her eyes before she slumped back down in the bed, still clearly exhausted, “‘m hungry.”

“Polly’s making you some soup, she shouldn’t be long.” Tommy combed his fingers through her hair, something that had always calmed and comforted (Y/N).

“You here for good? Not going back to France?”

“I’m not going back to France princess, don’t worry” Tommy pressed a kiss to her forehead.

Polly found Tommy cuddled up to (Y/N) in her bed when she returned with her dinner and she sent Tommy a scathing glare, it had been hell trying to look after (Y/N) and she hated the idea of it spreading through the house.

Tommy shrugged apologetically at his aunt before he helped (Y/N) sit up so that she could eat. The room was silent as (Y/N) ate until she finished and complained to her aunt that she was hot and sticky, so when Polly left to get a bath ready for her, Tommy and (Y/N) were left alone again.

“If I get better…can we go to the fair?” (Y/N) asked

“There’s no if, you are going to get better and when you do, I’ll take you to fair, okay?” Tommy told her.

Polly came in to get (Y/N) for her bath and after Tommy carried her to the bathroom, he let them do what they had to do while he went downstairs to his brothers. Arthur was playing with Finn, who immediately ran over to him as soon as he spotted him and Tommy felt guilty that he had forgotten his youngest brother in favour of their sister.

“Alright, Finn? Did you hold down the fort whilst we were away?” Tommy asked as he lifted his brother up.

Finn nodded, “I’m glad you’re back...too many girls”

Both Arthur and Tommy laughed at his words, Finn had been surrounded by women for the past four years but now his brothers were back.

Tommy spent some more time with Finn until Polly told him that (Y/N) was done with her bath and was asking for him. When he reached her room, he found her tucked up and waiting for him.

“Can you tell me a story?” She asked as soon as he stepped in.

Tommy settled into the seat next to her bed and began to recite a story that he knew off by heart. It was (Y/N)’s favourite story and before the war, she demanded that he read it to her every night and after so long, he no longer needed the book because he remembered every word.

(Y/N) fell asleep quickly, the illness draining so much of her energy and Tommy sat there watching her sleep, his eyes focused on the movements of her chest, making sure she was still breathing. He would forgo sleep every night until she was better if he had to.

He didn’t notice Polly slip in until she spoke up, “She’s a Shelby girl, she’ll beat this.”

“I spent four years in France, digging tunnels day in day out and fighting men so that you were safe over here. Then I come home and I find my baby sister on death’s door.” Tommy’s voice was quiet, “It’s not fucking fair”

“It’s not but she will pull through and I know you will do anything for the little girl. You’ll make sure so that she’s never wanting and you’ll protect her from everything you can.”

“She’s not going to die. I won’t let her.” Tommy declared.

Polly felt her lips pull into a smile in the first time in a while before she left them alone.

True to Tommy’s words, (Y/N) didn’t die. Thanks to her aunt’s determined efforts, (Y/N) pushed through the worst of the flu and over the following weeks (Y/N) returned back to full health, she regained the weight she lost and was quickly becoming bored of being confined to bed which had turned her to start trying to convince her brothers to ignore Polly’s instructions but none of them was willing to face a telling off by their aunt. But soon enough, (Y/N) was out of the bed and back to causing mischief with her twin.

Tommy and Polly watched as (Y/N) ran around with Finn, both of them giggling as they chased each other.

“I told you she’ll be fine” Polly told him

“I know.” Tommy gave her a smile before he rounded up his youngest siblings so they could go to the fair as he promised.

#peaky blinders imagines #peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinder imagine #x reader #tommy shelby imagines #tommy shelby x reader #peaky blinders x reader #shelby!sister #shelby!reader #sister!reader #imagines #john shelby imagines #arthur shelby imagines

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aerial-aspie · 3 years

Text

An Autistic Point of View 21 (Summer Camp Edition)

Hi there it's Hazel! I'm finally back after a bit of a too long break because I've been struggling to find things to write about (which is also called being too lazy too) but I actually have something to talk about today! Yay!

So if you haven't seen on some of my earlier posts, I am a youth summer camp leader and 3 weeks ago I led for my first time and this is how it went.

Coming from a northern city in England, it was already difficult because everyone else was from London and were all talking gossip about people at school and would leave me out of everything, telling me I didn't want to know. I felt left out and isolated because I couldn't join in conversations as much because I didn't know who anyone was. This went on for the full four days of pre-camp preparations and it was quite difficult, another thing that happened was someone used the phrase 'you're not Jewish if you don't know...' and this was about a musical called 13 which was about a Bar Mitzvah. I'd never heard of it because I mostly know things that people tell me about or that I've seen come on tour and I wasn't sure how to respond because I didn't know it.

We also had multiple clashes in interests because the interests of all the girls (who I clashed with more) were more mainstream such as watching love island (I hate that show with a passion, it's disgusting), being die hard mamma mia fans (the songs are annoying and the film is awful in my opinion) and this is about everyone, they love pop music (again, I hate pop music and would much rather listen to vocaloid, jpop, electro swing, heavy metal and whatever is on my weird playlist). So because of this we clashed quite badly, especially over our opinions on love island because I'm so opinionated on how much I hate that show and they love it we got into a somewhat argument, so I left the building and went back to my dorm because it was the evening when we could do basically what we wanted.

Now I've gotten that off my chest, I need to say that I loved the group of people I was leading with. Yes we didn't get along interests wise and north, south divide didn't help but they were lovely to lead with and some of them I've come out with friends for life (well if we can keep in contact).

When the kids came it was so daunting, but luckily my friend Ash (who is leading with me) was on the coach with them because they had just had covid and had to isolate before coming, but they were fine.

I can't really remember fully what went on every day but I can tell you that the first meal time was horrible. I had this one kid on my table who begged me for the full half an hour about what we were doing next and I couldn't tell him at all and was panicking about what to say. I grabbed one of the senior leaders and was like "help, I don't know what to do" and he gave me some tips but even then, the kid wouldn't get off my back. He started being like "I hate it when people keep secrets from me, my mum once kept a secret from me and it was so horrible so tell me what we're doing please" (this is not exactly word for word what he said but he did bring his mum into it).

However, dinner was luckily over and I thought I was done with him but whilst we were blocking the entrance to one of the buildings whilst the activity was being set up, he went at me again and I was really struggling and panicking. Ash, who is one of my closest friends and knows me better than any of the other leaders, quickly spotted I was in a bad position and turned to me and said "Hazel, I think you're needed inside" and instantly got me out of that stressful situation. I thanked them for it later because it really saved me from a panic attack.

I only had one major panic attack through the entirety of camp, which is the best I've ever come out of one before. The one I had was because we were running early and had to think of something to do. I was suddenly told in front of all the kids with no prior warning that I was leading an invisible circus session and I found and excuse to leave the room and then I panicked. From there on out, the people running the camp knew they had to pre warn me about anything that was causing major changes and I would have to do things on the spot (even though I already told them that when we talked about my needs on a call prior to camp).

Last extremely negative moment when leading, then I'll get onto the positive sides. The kids were so hard work and one day they had 4 discipline talks and it did nothing. We were getting so annoyed and upset that Tammy had to do a full powerful speech about how upset we all were and I could see she was struggling too. Because of this, she wasn't in the next session she was leading with me (and I do not and will not blame her for it because she was so upset and needed that break). Luckily, Ethan was there to help me out and helped run the session and keep the moral high up for the kids as I was really struggling. At dinner I basically broke and after went to sit in the welfare room, there was another kid in there from another bubble and so I moved a chair just to put more distance between us and it was stuck to a phone lead and the phone clattered to the floor. This kid was very noise sensitive and was so frightened, I apologised so much to them before they got taken out and that was enough to set the tears off. There were leaders from the other camp there who knew me and comforted me (socially distant) because they understood I was having a terrible day.

I was then kicked out the welfare room because kids from the other camp were eating in there and this was for safeguarding reasons and so I got sent to one place to wait for the welfare officer but she was already there with someone else. I was basically a stranded autistic person, mid meltdown, not knowing where to go.

I did get rescued by another set of leaders who make our resources and they sat and talked to me whilst I cried it out. I really wanted to go home then, I hated it so much that day and soon the welfare officer came and I talked it out to her before ringing my parents and telling them about it.

I didn't go home in the end and made it all the way through.

Now for the good moments.

Meetings in the evenings were the funniest moments ever, where we talked about about our day and told funny stories and they never failed to make me laugh and always made my day, plus they were always followed by snacks!

We led some amazing activities where the kids got so into them and joined in with everything so that we all had a blast in the end. Site activities were so fun and I got to do high ropes, crate stacking and climbing and I loved it. Me and Ash went as a pair in crate stacking and I fell off at 6 crates, while they got to 13 and it was supposed to be a pairs challenge. But let me say, I screamed the whole way up the crate stacking.

The last night of camp talent show was hilarious. I got to do my poi in it because I was not comfortable doing what everyone else was doing, which was being randomly assigned acts on the go and you had to go up and improvise. But all the improvisation acts by the leaders were so funny, there was; the freedom sandwich song with a singer and someone with a broken finger on recorder, bohemian rhapsody without the vowels, slam poetry about the clavicle and more and it was so funny and such a great night.

The last night of camp in general was great because I pigged out on ice cream and popcorn and got my face painted as a cat. It was great except me 2 hour shift of watching the quiet sleeping area, which was dead boring but then I got to sleep early.

Finally, I did a talk on autism, at first it was just a half an hour chat session where Ash came to sit and listen and also crowd control in case anyone was silly in it. I only had 3 people turn up and another leader ran a football chat session to try and bring more people to mine (how sweet of them) so I ended up with 5 of them, all of them boys.

I thought they would mess around but they were so mature it was amazing! They asked loads of interesting questions about what it was like to be autistic and I answered them all and I loved this talk so much because I was so happy when it ended because it went so well and all the boys said I was now their favourite leader and it made me so happy.

I then ran this talk again in a session which was an hour where you could move between chats freely, whenever you wanted to. Ash was inspired by my autism talk and wanted to do one on being non-binary however, they didn't want to stop people from coming to mine. I turned round and said it doesn't matter about who comes and who doesn't, you should lead it, don't let me hold you back. And they did it! I was so proud of Ash for leading that talk.

I ended up getting all the boys in my talk, whilst Ash got all the girls (which they all apologised to me about not coming but I said it was fine and that they could come and ask questions at any time). All the boys were mature again and I got to happily chat about being autistic and I loved listening to all the questions they asked and anecdotes about people they knew and it went so well again.

Finally, my last highlight was Ash's 'why don't we talk about periods' session which most of the leaders all assisted on because it was so interesting. All the girls were sharing stories, I shared a story and even lots of boys turned up and one was brave enough to ask where the blood goes which I was so proud of him for asking. Whilst the female participants found that question funny, we were making this boy feel good for asking because we thought it was a mature question to come from a 12 year old boy and happily answered it.

To help desensitise people to some of the words we were using, we had everyone yelling period, menstruation, period blood, etc and it was good fun and I loved it.

And that's all about being autistic as a summer camp leader, will I lead again? Probably not. I considered trying again next year but it clashes with the commonwealth games and whilst there were positives from leading, there were lots of negatives too that were off putting and I'd rather go to the commonwealth games.

I hope you enjoyed it and see you next time!

#autistic experiences #actually autsitic #autism #autistic positivity #being autistic #autistic life #autistic blogger #summer camp

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