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nihilistem · 8 months

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Hey! I read your study tips both posts regarding adhd . (Feel free to ignore )

I am still undiagnosed and I think it's adhd but i do not have the resources nor the environment or support system to do anything about it .I am a high schooler preparing for entrance exams and i really need to like get my shit together and i feel like i have wasted sm time already but i really do want to get better. When i sit to study i just can't focus if I keep my phone in some other room then also i would just sit and stare at my books without accomplishing something. I am trying really but it's feels like my brain is frozen and my body is moving .my brain keep screaming guilty and ashamed but i can't seem to do anything about it.your study post actually i related to a lot because pomodro kind of seems to be working for everyone but me and the you described the exact same things I do

I know this is a lot to ask for please feel free to ignore but how do I stop Letting my emotions take over and study consistently because I only have one chance at the exams

Oh my, first of all I’d like to say that, as cliché as it is, I know exactly how you feel. I was undiagnosed for so long (I was only diagnosed a few months ago) and I didn’t even know that the adhd things I experience on a regular basis wasn’t normal or neurotypical for so long.

first up : I know this is difficult, but please do not say such things about yourself. I’m not gonna get into the whole thing, (cuz I have done a post on that already) but it’s true that the more you drill that bad stuff into your brain, the more it’s gonna stick. We need our brains to be in the best condition possible to study efficiently and saying bad stuff about yourself that isn’t even true is just going to hinder your performance. You got this. I promise you’re not lazy. Your brain just isn’t motivated by the same things others are, but we can work with that simple difference.

I’ll make a separate post on how not to let your emotions take over, but for now …

adhd study tips for those trying to get into the habit.

— by a stem student with adhd.

here’s my first post on adhd study tips.

— don’t put your phone in a different room. Instead, download an app that prevents you from using other apps on your phone.

there’s plenty of apps that do this but the one I prefer is ypt because all its features are completely free and it stops your timer when you exit the app unless you enter ‘allowed app mode.’ I don’t know about you, but if I find that I’m just zoning out on my textbook then I end up stopping my timer and deleting the record because I know I didn’t actually study, and this motivates me to actually get some work done. The timer also gets me motivated to keep going for longer so I have physical proof of my focus time and studies. It will feel good to even have just 1 hour of study time on it, I promise.

— even if you’re not interested in your studies, try your best to find even one thing that interests you.

novelty, challenge and interest are some of the best motivators of the adhd brain, so use it. I know that sparking your curiosity for a subject you hate seems impossible, but hear me out.

ever since I was young, I was exposed to books and I drew everyday. This caused me to become very passionate about the arts, but since I had adhd and didn’t know, I failed all my classes and specifically hated chemistry because it was specifically designed to be everything that I can’t be good at due to my poor memory and the need to memorize a TON of concepts. Then during class one day, I was doing chemistry work with my friends and felt frustrated that they could easily balance equations and work out which compounds were acids or bases purely by its chemical formula. And that’s what sparked me to start reading my textbook to see what the big deal was. How was it possible for one to just know when something is a acid solely from looking at a bunch of letters? This started a chain reaction; I found my answer, and found that the process of finding my answer and learning this new information was fulfilling. So I looked at all the other chemistry topics, and it turns out chemistry was fun. I was supposed to be an art student but now I’m majoring in chemistry and biology, all because of that sense of challenge and curiosity I was given that day.

tdlr; I was bad at chemistry but I’m now majoring in it because I felt challenged by a friend and was curious to know how they could solve chem equations easily.

All it took was a bit of curiosity. It’s a very powerful thing to the adhd brain. And if you use this as a motivator for your studies it might even cause you to hyper-fixate on your work, which means you’ll naturally spend more time studying just to find all the answers you’re now dying to know.

— use the pomodoro timer, but think about the things that you have to do that seems a little impossible to do under 25 minutes.

This fulfills the ‘challenge’ category I mentioned in the previous tip.

Let me explain; I subconsciously started doing this to myself without anyone telling me this and it’s helped me a LOT. Here’s an example;

“This chapter’s too long, it’s impossible to read through everything and understand the key concepts in just twenty five minutes.”

is it, though?

So I was off to the races, genuinely reading through every page and taking note of every single heading or bold or italicized word so I will be able to summarize the entire topic by the time the twenty five minutes is up.

And it doesn’t even matter if you don’t make that twenty five minute mark, because you’ll feel a sense of defeat and try it again with another chapter/topic.

this accomplishes two things; one, the work you’ve been putting off or zoning out on is now probably 20% - 50% completed and now you feel motivated to continue. Two, this method will train you to be faster in learning or studying new material or even just completing work in general, depending on what you’re challenging yourself to do.

— dress up, do your hair, study at a library or cafe you love (and possibly make pretty notes.)

I’ve talked about interest, I’ve talked about challenge, and now I’m gonna talk about novelty.

Do this with purpose! But what do I mean by that?

I’m sure you’ve come across studious girls in media or even people on social media making videos and taking pretty photos of their day out to study. Usually they’re dressed the part and even if they’re not, there’s a certain vibe, aesthetic or aura about them that is just so desirable that it makes you wish you were doing what they were doing. And if you don’t feel this way, find content creators or media that do make you feel this way.

How will this help me? Well, there are actually a few reasons but the first one that comes to mind is that this is also an adhd tip used outside of studying. Combining a task you don’t want to do with a task you’d like to do is a faster and more efficient way of convincing yourself to do long, difficult or even tiring tasks. Another is that doing this would also mean you’ve technically gotten yourself to desire studying, something more commonly known as romanticizing studying. If you make studying look fun, glamorous or even desirable for yourself then you’re sure to get to the hideous parts of it. Think about being a straight A student, someone who’s always wearing nice clothes with great hair and such a focused work ethic. Once you desire to be that person and you dress like that person, you’ll start to do the things that person will do.

— use the pomodoro timer but set it to even shorter bursts instead. (e.g. 15 minutes work, 5 minutes break.)

Or hell, on my worst days I set it to 5 minutes work, 5 minutes break.

The whole point of this exercise is to just start, because that’s arguably the hardest part about studying, you can’t get yourself to actually start or to actually focus. So promise yourself a five minute break after a very short amount of time of reading.

— skip straight to the questions of a topic, try to do them and identify the information you need to get the answer right.

For example, I came across a bio question that was rather simple but I didn’t know the answer to because I haven’t revised the topic for a while, and the question was, what is needed in the body for anaerobic respiration to take place? And the answer was simple, but I didn’t know because again, I didn’t study the material before answering the paper.

one’s brain can have the habit of being complacent especially when you don’t wanna do work, so diving head first into the questions and realizing that you don’t know jack shit would be a good wake up call for you and your brain—and this can connect to the second point that I made because you might find that you’d be eager to get the answer right all on your own, and become curious as to what the answer is.

important to remember …

erase everything bad that you were told or led to believe about studying. I promise that if you look for ways to make it engaging for you and form a habit, studying can be something you don’t dread or worry about everyday. You are capable. This is the start of your journey. Yes, the question of ‘what if I get distracted again’ will always be there but think about what could happen if today is the first day you’re not distracted. If you don’t at least try to start now, you will have zero chance of being able to actually focus and study. But if you try, the worst that will happen is that you tried. If you keep trying, it will happen. I promise.

If you need any more tips regarding adhd, (or being undiagnosed,) please do let me know. I’ll do my best to help.

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buns0fst33l · 4 months

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Cod Men Headcanons

Simon “Ghost” Riley

~sfw~ These are completely random and don’t follow any sort of cohesive theme, they’re just a bunch of opinions I have about Ghost.

- Did very well in school science fairs and looked forward to them.

- Takeout Indian food is his comfort meal. I saw someone else headcanon him as really enjoying spicy food, especially if it’s Indian food. I don’t remember who said it but it was their idea and I AGREE so I’m sharing it.

- Was one of those boys who was way smaller than his female peers until high school and hit a HUGE growth spurt one summer. He did not realize how drastic the change was. And he was confused when people didn’t recognize him.

- Helpful son. Tried his best to keep his mom safe and stress free by helping around the house as much as possible. And therefore,

- Very respectful of women. Would subtly try to put a woman at ease if he noticed she was scared or uncomfortable. Given his upbringing and what he went through when he was tortured, I feel like he has a profoundly better understanding of the mistreatment of women in general, as compared to most men.

(I imagine this plays a part when he and Soap are questioning Milena. He didn’t step in and intimidate her until he had to, even though it would have been easier to start with.)

- Demisexual. I don’t think I need to explain this one.

- Thinks he’s a dog person because he doesn’t know anything about cats and hasn’t been around them much. Is actually a cat person who also loves dogs and just doesn’t know it.

- Laughs exclusively at the dumbest shit ever but it’s CUTE. laughed at a weevil the first time he saw one because it looks just like its name. One time Riley got too excited when Ghost gave him a bit of table scrap chicken; tried to swallow it whole, gagged dramatically and cough-launched it across the room. Soap has been trying to get that kind of laugh out of Ghost ever since. Not even close.

- Secretly likes American football. I don’t know why I feel like he’d be ashamed to admit this but I do.

- I’m very torn on what kind of vehicle he would drive. I want to say he would have like, an old black 2008 pathfinder as his everyday normal car. But he’s cocky and I feel like he’d also have a very well kept NICE car as more of a toy. Something like a souped up black Audi. Either vintage (maybe a Quattro?) and in mint condition or brand new and shiny. Note: I do not know jack SHIT about cars I am using so much Google

#simon riley #simon ghost riley #cod headcanons #cod mw2 #ghost headcanons #simon riley headcanons #headcanons #sfw #codmenheadcanons

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goorehound · 1 year

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okay I’m feeling petty and frustrated with the way people are treating severe social anxiety right now because I have gotten enough shit for not being manly enough because of my anxiety. so it’s time to project on to könig! here’s a bunch of stuff that makes me debilitatingly anxious that I think König would also struggle with.

Sfw (one nsfw), König Headcanons, talk of anxiety

Things I think would make König anxious

Most of the time that he is experiencing anxiety, nobody will have the vaguest notion. Especially strangers in public. That shit is incredibly internal for him. But chances are if he’s having a conversation with someone he doesn’t deem a close friend, his brain is going a mile a minute. Should I have said that? Could I have phrased it better? Are they staring at me? Did I say that right? Was that a joke? I can’t believe I just said that. How do I end this conversation? Do they think I’m being an asshole?

Stores. He’s not a fan of new stores. He’s not a fan of stores where people will go out of their way to ask if he needs anything. He’ll go, sure, of course. If he needs to buy shit, he has to do what he has to do. But stores, especially grocery stores, often come with the overwhelming sense of dread. He’s convinced that somehow everyone will be looking at him and analyzing his every move, and will realize he’s just some big moron. Yeah. Grocery stores suck.

Someone got his order wrong? Like fuck is this man about to be like “I asked for no pickles.” Beyond that, he could be given a completely wrong dish and he’d shrug because whatever, I’ll eat that too even if he’s really not a fan. You’d be insane to think he’d call over some poor waiter to complain about perfectly edible food. No way.

Starting conversations. He hates that, he finds it much easier to follow somebody else’s lead. It’s just too much hassle, he spends so long fretting over how to start it that by the time he has an idea it feels like way too much time has passed. May as well continue sitting there and not acknowledge each other if he’s made it this long without a fucking word. Otherwise he’d just feel awkward breaking such a long silence. Then again he’s worried they’ll think he’s a huge asshole for not saying a single word to them. Still. He doesn’t actually want to try and navigate a conversation. Honestly, he’d much rather people just stay the fuck away from him if he’s having a bad anxiety day.

He rehearses what he wants to say in his head, and my guy is so ashamed when he goes to finally say it and it comes out completely fucking garbled. Either he swaps a couple words around or it’s just partially incoherent because he’s trying to get it out so fast. You can see the defeat in this man’s eyes, and he’ll usually follow his fuck up with saying “Nope, that’s not right.” Or some kind of frustrated curse.

Doctors appointments. Awful. The endless sea of embarrassing possibilities there is a fucking minefield. Again, he’ll do it if he has to, but he’d really rather fucking not if he can avoid it.

(NSFW) Flirting and dirty talk. If you looked him in the eye and asked him to dirty talk you, he’d probably stop breathing for a second. Sometimes he says some foul absolutely toe-curling shit in the heat of the moment, especially when he’s close and loses his filter, but it has to be spontaneous. If he thinks about it too much he’ll get way too in his head and probably not even be able to get it up.

Phone calls! No. Just no. Fucking no. He’d rather carve his eyes out with a spoon than make a phone call.

#könig #könig x reader #mwii #cod #mw2 #headcanons

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roseillith · 3 months

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Pls don’t hurt yourself. Deleting a blog is one thing but pls don’t hurt yourself. So sorry to hear you’re feeling this way. You put so much joy and beauty into the world via this blog im one of many recipients of that and no matter how you feel you look like externally, i and many others get a chance to see your soul and it’s beautiful, expansive, smart, inspirational and full of humour! As a black person I also sometimes feel alienated and off key when my fam speak ga of twi around me and yet haven’t taught me, sometimes I feel so disconnected from everyone and feel like I’m floating away with nothing to hold me, no anchor to any sort of real meaningful life. Betrayal from friends or from love, broken heartedness, loneliness strike but still there is a lil bit of light, there is the wind blowing on my face, a glass of water, a favourite song, some sun. There are small joys that remind us we are not alone. And You are not alone and I hope that one day soon you receive all the joy light and good energy you put into this harsh world. Pls don’t give up. We love you, keep your head up

tyvm I appreciate your message deeply, I feel a constant push n pull whenever I log on & post on here, the things that I’ve posted recently (including this) has made feel ashamed in that I have spilled out all of my thoughts n feelings out on this public platform, the same place that I’ve been constructing as way to separate my physical& literal self and run towards things that I have stored inside me, all of the stuff the I carry along with me whenever I’m out in public, that I know I can’t share w/ any nigga that I know out there instead I try to avert my eyes from all other dudes out there cuz I know I don’t fit in and feel physically gross when I’m around w/ a bunch of dudes, me failing to be a man in general and avoid man-to-man convos irl and instead retreating those inner stuff into the girl that I want to be, the kind of girl where I know I can apply all the totality of myself out there into the world.

Now I’m just staring at this public persona that I have made of myself feeling increasingly distant day-to-day and I wonder why I put all my all into this blog w/ gifs,pics,anime stuff, film stuff, music stuff etc. when I can’t muster up the courage to talk about all that shit outside out aloud without having to be disgusted from hearing the sound of my voice or/and how the person/s I’m saying it to is even viewing me physically & as a person/“grown up man” having the courage to go out and transition to the girl that I can see in the distance.

The one rule I had when making this blog was to never spill out my personal shit of actually being a man irl who’s found solace and significant more ease in being a woman online cuz I know that if I ever did that it would be embarrassing & the end for me personally, I wouldn't be able to look myself in the eye, all the shit that I had posted on here it all being a lie to me, and worse of all I never really took in any support from anyone else here I had this lone wolf-esque mentality where I always try and not get close to anybody I was mutuals w/, never share anything abt my personal shit, always looking through the window seeing other ppl chill with others, and when I look at myself on here I’m feel still as alone as I do irl & tbh much of it is my fault from not being able to put myself out there and feeling disassociated from myself in whatever I do on here and irl

#answered #txt

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massivedrickhead · 10 months

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Bechloe Week Day 6: Celebrity Scandal

Words: 1732

Notes: Is this any good? I don't know. I wasn't going to write anything for this prompt and then the idea popped into my head so I wrote it out in a couple of hours and figured I might as well post it.

Read on AO3

“Beca, it’s about time, I’ve been calling you all day,” Theo said, his voice the definition of frustration, when Beca finally answered her phone.

“Yeah,” Beca said, pacing her bedroom, one hand swiping at the tears that kept building in her eyes. “I’ve been a little busy.”

“I trust you’ve seen the news?”

“Of course I’ve fucking seen it,” Beca snapped, unable to keep her voice calm. “My phone has been blowing up all day and there are paparazzi camped out outside my house.”

“This is bad, Beca,” he said.

“No fucking shit, it’s bad,” she said. “My question is what are you going to do about it?”

“I told you to be careful. I told you this would happen if you insisted on keeping this thing with Chloe going,” he said.

“Thing? Dude, it’s 2023, you can call her my girlfriend,” Beca said.

She heard Theo sigh, and imagined him pinching the bridge of his nose - his go-to move when he thought Beca was acting deliberately childish. “Yes, it’s 2023. The world has changed. Everything is sunshine and rainbows and love is love, blah, blah blah. Welcome to the real world, Beca.”

“I didn’t do anything wrong,” Beca said. “Christ, it’s not like I got caught doing a line of coke or something.”

“You’re a popstar with a tween-aged audience,” Theo said. “You need to set a good example.”

“And being queer isn’t a good example? Is that what you’re actually trying to say, Theo?”

“No, I’m saying getting photographed in the back of your car with a girl in your lap isn’t a good example,” he said. “Not to the parents of your audience, anyway. Have you been on Twitter? They’re calling for a boycott of your record. Of the label. You’ve… I don’t know how you could be so careless.”

Beca swallowed and clenched her jaw. “Nothing happened,” she said. “I hadn’t seen Chloe in three months because of the press tour, so we made out in my car. You know, since she isn’t allowed to be seen entering my house and has to scurry in through the back at night like she’s some kind of dirty secret? I just wanted five minutes with her before I had to go inside alone.”

From where she was still sitting on her bed, Beca heard Chloe sniff, and she saw her turn away to wipe her eyes.

“And it might have cost you your career,” he said. “I’m trying to fix this, Beca, but they’re asking for blood.”

“I never asked to be an example to a bunch of kids,” Beca said, unable to look away from Chloe. “I’ve… I was never ashamed of my sexuality before now. Never. I’ve always known who I was, and no matter how many people told me it was wrong, I never listened to them. And I should have never listened to you.”

“I was trying to protect you,” he said.

“From what?” Beca said, with a hollow laugh. “You’ve turned my relationship with the woman I love into some sordid secret thing. If we’d just… dated - existed - without making it into a thing, no one would have cared. One picture snapped of us holding hands, and the headline would have been what? ‘Musician holds hands with girlfriend’? But no, we couldn’t do that. No holding hands in public, no dates, no sharing the same car. She has to sneak into my house, or I have to sneak into hers. She can’t just come and pick me up from the airport, no, she has to hide in the back of my car. Maybe I shouldn’t have pulled her into my lap the second we stopped, but if she’d been able to simply get out of the car with me, and walk the five feet to my house, we could have done that in private.”

Chloe’s eyes met hers as the room was lit up by the flash of a camera from outside. In the brief window of light, Beca saw Chloe’s eyes were still full of tears, mascara streaked down her cheeks. Their argument still hung heavily in the air, and Beca found she couldn’t look at her. She crossed the room and pulled the curtains tighter together, paranoid that the vultures lurking outside would see in.

“Are you done blaming me for this?” Theo asked, sounding bored, if not a little impatient. “We need to discuss how we fix it.”

“You said they want blood, give it to them,” Beca said.

“Who’s blood?”

“Mine,” Beca said. “I know how you want me to fix it, and I’m not willing to do it.”

“Beca-”

“No,” Beca said. “You want me to break up with her. Make a public statement that I’m sorry that I let everyone down. That I’ve seen the error of my ways and it won’t happen again, right?”

“I mean, you don’t have to use those exact words, but-”

“I’m not doing it,” Beca said. “I never wanted to be a pop star, but you pressured me into it. I never wanted to write music for tweens, but you said that’s what the label thought I should do. I never wanted to keep Chloe a secret, but you said it was for the best. I’m done letting you and the label make decisions for me.”

“Beca, think about this,” he said, sounding more panicked now than he had when had first called. “Think about what you’re saying. If you walk away from this, you’d be giving up everything you’ve worked for. The label owns your songs and, until your contract ends, you can’t make or perform music for anyone else. You have three years left on that contract. You’ll lose everything.”

“No I won’t,” Beca said. “But if I do what you’re asking me to do, I will.”

“God, use your brain for once-”

“I’m not giving up my relationship, Theo, but what happens after is up to you. In an hour, I’m going to post on Instagram that Chloe is my girlfriend. That we’ve been together since the day I was signed by the label, and that I love her. So either you’re putting out a statement that you’re cutting ties with me because of my sexual orientation, or that you’re standing by me after my privacy was violated.”

“It isn’t that simple,” he said, an edge to his voice.

“It is, actually,” Beca said. “You can frame it however you want. You can say that we’re parting ways due to a personal conflict, or creative differences. You can even say that due to ‘recent revelations’ that I am no longer being represented by the label. Whatever words you want to use is fine, because I can let the world know the truth. And you can’t sue me for slander, or libel, or whatever when every word I say will be the truth. Because I’ve got receipts, Theo. I have emails and texts and voicemails all telling me that if I’m going to date Chloe, it needs to be a secret. Then we can see who’s getting boycotted. Do you think the artists on your label who are allowed to be openly queer will be happy? Even if they don’t care, I think their fans might.”

“Don’t try and play this game, Beca,” he said.

“I’m not playing,” Beca said. “I’m done pretending and hiding. Getting to call Chloe my girlfriend, and getting to love her, has been the best thing to ever happen to me. And she has been nothing but proud and supportive, even when I was treating her like something to be ashamed of.” Beca looked at Chloe again, and although there were still tears in her eyes, she was smiling. She held out her hand and Beca crossed the room to take it. “No more hiding, Theo.”

“So what do you suggest we do?” He said.

“Nothing,” Beca said. “I put up my post, you put out your statement that the label will be standing by me, and then we all move on. The press will get bored and move on. The internet will get bored and move on. I go back to making you all money, and you stop telling me who I can and can’t be seen with.”

“The label won’t go for it,” he said.

“You don’t know unless you ask,” Beca said. “But it’s either that or you fire me. Because I won’t give her up. Call me when you’ve made a decision.” She hung up the phone without another word and dropped it onto the bed. For the first time in a long time, Beca felt like she could breathe. She felt like she was gaining just a little bit of control back.

“Bec, I can’t let you do this,” Chloe said.

“It isn’t your decision,” Beca said. “I’m not breaking up with you. If you’ll still have me, then nothing they say will make me give you up.”

“Of course I’ll still have you,” Chloe said. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Beca said.

“You could lose your job, your songs, everything,” Chloe said.

“Not everything,” Beca said. “Not you.”

“Never me,” Chloe said.

The phone on the bed began ringing, and Beca saw Theo’s name flash up on the screen.

“Well?”

“Make your stupid post,” he said. “We’ll be releasing a press statement in the morning that no action will be taken and that the label supports you. Next time you make out with your girlfriend, do it in private, will you?”

Beca grinned at Chloe. “Maybe. Thanks for finally fighting my corner, Theo.”

“Yeah, well, turns out you’re actually a pretty valuable asset.”

“Aw, that’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

“Don’t get used to it,” he said.

Beca hung up the phone again, and Chloe threw her arms around her neck.

“I’m sorry about earlier,” Beca said, hugging Chloe back tightly. “I didn’t mean to snap at you like that.”

“I know,” Chloe said. “I forgive you.”

“I’m so sorry for everything I’ve put you through since we got together,” Beca said.

“I knew what I was signing up for,” Chloe said. “And, yes, it was really hard, but you were worth it. You’re still worth it.”

“I’m never going to do that to you again,” Beca said. “I promise. I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” Chloe replied. “Always have, always will.”

#bechloe week 2023 #bechloe week #bechloe week 23 #bechloe #pitch perfect fanfiction #fanfic #fanfiction #pitch perfect fanfic #beca mitchell #chloe beale #pitch perfect #beca #chloe #bechloe fanfiction #bechloe fic #bechloe fanfic #pitch perfect fic #no matter the timeline

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kisses4suna · 2 years

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hii, would you do akaashi and iwazumi and Kuroo if they found out their s/o would scratch themselves while washing their hands with soap aggressively so it makes their hands have scars? I use to do this all the time when I was stressed out. But I’m better now(:

FINDING OUT YOUR SCARS !

☆ featuring. akaashi, iwaizumi. gn!reader

☆ tw. scratching ? , mentions of ED ( eating disorders )

☆ a/n. hi babes! im so sorry about that :( i used to do that before too and it got really bad, my skin started peeling so i had to put a bunch of vaseline 😭😭 i’m so glad you got out of that habit!! and i am so sorry because i can only fit two charcaters for these, i’ll make a part two with kuroo and another chatacter ! also sorry if you waited long for this, ive been busy :((

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

AKAASHI KEIJI

you would always hide your hands away from akaashi, always wear gloves, mittens, or either shove your hands inside your hoodie or jacket. he didn’t know why though. he thought maybe you didnt wanna hold his hands? or maybe you were insecure of them like him

he asked you about them one day, and you didnt want to hide anymore. “keiji.. my hands are ugly! their all scratched up and scarred! im sorry..” you say, frowning. you wished he could’ve found someone better, someone who would actually hold his hand, or even show them at all.

it takes him a minute to ponder on his thoughts, before he asks why, “i just washed my hands a lot.. i scrubbed too much and now their all rough.. ‘m sorry keiji.. i didn’t know they’d get this bad.” you looked down, too ashamed to look him in the eye. “it doesn’t matter.. scarred or not, your hands will always be beautiful to me, everything about you will be beautiful to me. i love you, i want you to know that.” he grabs your hands, pulling them both up to kiss them.

and he isn’t lying, scratches or no scratches, you’ll always be the most beautiful living thing he’s ever seen.

IWAIZUMI HAJIME

he was confused at first- maybe you weren’t one for physical touch, and just like akaashi he respected your wishes, but was just curious, always wondering why you never showed your hands, at all.

you two were both hanging out in his room, your hands shoved into your pocket of your favorite hoodie. it wasn’t till iwaizumi walked over to you, grabbing your face with his two hands and planted a kiss on your face, “hey” he says, looking down on you, where you were sat on his bed. “hi” is all you say, looking up at his tall figure. “i got you snacks” he said, “here, eat something”

“.. i think i’ll have some later.. i’m not that hungry” is all you say, shoving your hands deeper into your pockets. “c’mon, you barely ate anything all day, at least eat something, please?” he asks, sitting down next to you.

“hajime- really, im not that hungry” trying to convince him, he didn’t believe one bit of it. “y/n.. do you have an eating disorder?” he asks, worried. “what- no!” you say, eyes widening.

“then are you alright? why don’t you want to eat around me?”

“iwa, what do you mean! we always eat together-“ you ask, acting completely clueless, “yeah but you just sit there saying you aren’t hungry! i have to practically feed you myself!” he slightly yells.

“it’s cause i hate my hands!” you yell back. “your what?!” he asks, completely dumbfounded. “my hands.. i just, well..” you stutter out.

you bring out your hands to show him, all scarred and scratched. “hajime.. i hate ‘em.. i can’t do anything now with these scars..”

he sighs, he had a totally different idea in his head, “oh baby.. listen, im sorry i yelled at you alright? you know i love you, but you don’t need to hide those. i don’t care if their scared or bruised or burnt or anything.. i was just worried you weren’t eating or something.. you really scared the shit out of me..” he says, voice grumbling at the end of his sentence.

he leaned in and kissed your forehead, his hands interwinding with yours.

#kisses4suna #akaashi headcanons #akaashi x y/n #akaashi comfort #akaashi fluff #akaashi keiji x reader #akaashi keiji #akaashi #akaashi x you #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi hajime #iwaizumi x y/n #iwaizumi fluff #iwaizumi comfort #iwaizumi hajime x reader #iwaizumi x you #iwaizumi fanfic

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sattlersquarry · 2 years

Text

Elegia III (Steve Harrington x Reader)

Summary: You take a shopping trip to the War Zone with the gang and plan your attack.

Word Count: 1760

Warnings: Language, grief, canon-typical fear.

This takes place during the events of ep. 8, "Papa."

Read Part 1 Here. Read Part 2 Here. Read Part 4 Here.

You didn’t realize the address Robin and Steve gave you for your after-work meetup was the War Zone. The War Zone was a superstore just outside of town that specialized in guns, ammo, hunting gear, camping supplies, and a bunch of other junk you honestly didn’t give two shits about.

You stood on the curb outside the store with your headphones on, waiting for Steve and Robin to arrive. You noticed a gaggle of high school jocks peel into the parking lot, looking pissed. The blond boy leading the charge didn’t even apologize when he bumped into you.

“Hey!” you said, pulling off your headphones. “Watch it.”

He turned and scowled at you, eyes glassy like he was sleep deprived. “You watch it, bitch!”

He reminded you of Sam on his bad days (which were pretty much every day). Seeing Sam again today, even though he wasn’t real and was part of that nightmarish hellscape, was doing a number on your nerves.

You turned away from the rude jock and put your headphones back on, ignoring whatever curses he spat at you before he barged into the store.

A few minutes later, a Winnebago zipped past and haphazardly parked in the back corner of the lot.

“What doofus drove that ugly thing here,” you muttered aloud. Your eyes widened when the door swung open and Steve stepped down, still wearing his green work vest over his striped polo. “Oh, for fucks sake.”

Following behind him were Robin, Nancy, Max, and a small girl in a pink dress.

“Hey, Y/N!” Steve said brightly.

“Steve,” you said. “Where’s your BMW?”

“It’s…in the shop.”

“You’re such a bad liar it’s laughable,” you said. “Why are we here?”

“Are you the one who almost croaked at the Family Video?” the girl in the pink dress asked rather bluntly. Robin swatted the girl’s arm.

“Don’t remind me,” you said. “I’m Y/N.”

“Erica Sinclair. Pleased to meet you. Now, are we going to stock up or not?”

The girls headed into the store, leaving you and Steve on the curb.

“I’ll explain everything,” Steve said. “Like I said I would. I can give you the overview while we pick up some stuff. You haven’t heard or seen anything else, right?”

“No. Not since I have ‘Elegia.’ I can still feel it though. Like, that Devil is in my subconscious, whispering. Waiting for the second I stop listening so he can get me again.” You cleared your throat and looked away, ashamed to admit: “To be honest, Harrington, I’m goddamn terrified.”

Steve hesitated, before putting a hand on your shoulder and squeezing it reassuringly.

“I’m not going to let anything happen to you,” he said gently. “I promise.”

He sounded so sincere, it made your heart swell a little. But you brushed these feelings away as quickly as they blossomed in your chest. This wasn’t the time for a romantic rendezvous. Plus, Steve didn’t actually like you like that. He was helping out because you were coworkers and friends, and he wanted to be nice.

“Okay,” you said. “Let’s shop.”

You spent the next half-hour collecting shiny, sharp-looking things that were hopefully lethal enough to kill the Devil. Steve informed you he was a supervillain-type creature with psychic powers that lived in an alternate dimension. They called him Vecna, after a D&D character, but he could also be called One or—the lamest option—Henry.

“He killed those other teens,” you said in a low voice while Steve loaded your shared shopping cart with gasoline. Your headphones hung around your neck, the soft notes of “Elegia” audible to only you (and Steve, due to his close proximity). “And now he wants me?”

“You and Max,” Steve said. “Well, actually, you or Max. He only needs 4 gates to get through to Hawkins. That’s why we need to kill this creep before he can get either one of you.”

“What’s Max’s favorite song?” you asked. “Just curious.”

“‘Running Up That Hill.’”

“Kate Bush!” you said with a proud nod. “She’s got good taste.”

“She’s great,” Steve said, “but I prefer Corey Hart.”

“Oh, I bet you do,” you said with a snicker. “I can just imagine you, singing in the shower with a shampoo-bottle microphone, belting out ‘Sunglasses At Night.’”

Steve raised an eyebrow mischievously. “You’ve imagined me in the shower?”

“Not like that, you perv,” you said, hoping Steve couldn't hear how hard your heart was beating. You shoved past him to throw a gilly suit into the cart.

“Put that back,” he said. He placed a hand on his hip in his usual I-know-best stance. “We don’t need that thing.”

“It’s camouflage!” you protested. “It could be useful.”

“It’s a waste of money.”

“No, the waste of money is this leather jacket you’re buying, Danny-Zuko-wannabe.”

“This leather is, like, six inches thick,” Steve said. “It’s protection so I don’t have to worry about more bat bites.”

“Stop bickering,” Robin said, before tossing a small mountain of lighters in the cart. “We’ve got to head out. Now.”

She nodded in the direction of the dickish jocks from before.

“Shit, Jason,” Steve mumbled. “Yeah, let’s go.”

Your posse convened at the registers before heading to the Winnebago, arms laden with brown paper bags adorned with the War Zone logo.

“There’s one more thing I need to catch you up on,” Steve said. “I couldn’t talk about it in the store, but there’s someone else in the RV that might startle you. Remember, Vecna’s the real killer, so don’t freak out.”

“Nothing can freak me out,” you said, before entering the RV. “Not after—Argh!”

“Hey Y/L/N!” Eddie Munson, Hawkins’ most wanted (alleged) serial killer, said. He was currently crouched under the windows with Dustin and Lucas, staying out of sight. “Is now a bad time to ask you to waive my video rental late fees?”

***

In a clearing on the outskirts of Hawkins, you worked with the Sinclair siblings to make spears for fighting the bats in the Upside Down.

“What song are you listening to,” Lucas asked after a few minutes of concentrated silence.

You removed the headphones for just a moment so Lucas and Erica could listen.

“That’s pretty,” Erica said. “Does it have words?”

“Nope,” you said. You covered your left ear, keeping the right ear free to listen to the siblings. “It’s just instrumental.”

“Doesn’t that get boring?”

“Instrumental songs make me feel like a character in a movie,” you said. “Like, this is the soundtrack of my life.”

“That’s dorky,” Erica said.

“Erica!” Lucas hissed.

“No, it’s okay,” you said. “It is pretty dorky. But this song holds a lot of emotional weight for me. Since I’ve been listening to it non-stop, I’ve been trying to separate the song from that sadness. I feel like that’s just what this Vecna guy wants. So instead, I imagine I’m some kind of badass hero, slow-mo walking toward some epic battle where I’ll emerge victorious.”

“Let’s hope you’re psychic,” Lucas said, “and we’ll ‘emerge victorious’ after our fight with Vecna.”

From across the field, Steve watched you out of the corner of his eye.

“You’re spilling gasoline,” Robin chided. “This whole area is now a fire hazard.”

“Shit, sorry,” Steve said.

“Don’t apologize for being a dingus in love,” Robin teased.

“I am so not in love,” Steve scoffed.

“Oh, really? How come you can’t keep your eyes off Y/N?”

“I’m worried about them!”

“Because…”

“Because they’re our friend, and like Max, they’re in danger.”

“Bullshit. You like them, and you have since the day Keith hired them, but you won’t do anything about it because you’ve been burned by love before.”

Steve sighed.

“Could you stop being so smart,” he said, “for just a day?”

“Nope.”

***

The plan was quite complicated: Max, Lucas, and Erica were going to the Creel House to bait Vecna into catching Max. Dustin and Eddie would distract and fight the demobats protecting the Upside Down. Nancy, Steve, and Robin would sneak into the house and kill Vecna while the bats were distracted and while he was in Max’s mind.

“So, what am I supposed to do?” you asked after the plan had been laid out.

“You have the most important job of all,” Steve said. “We’re going to drop you off at your apartment, and you’re going to stay there.”

“Excuse me?”

“Y/N,” Steve said, “this is dangerous. Really, really dangerous. You don’t have to be part of this—”

“I am part of it!” you snapped. “Vecna cursed me. As much as I want to run and hide, he’s killed so many people already and has plans to kill who knows how many more. I want to stop him before he goes after anyone I care about.”

“We could use extra help with the bats,” Dustin offered.

You had been formulating a different idea in your head after hearing Max’s role in the plan.

“No,” you said. “I want to be the one to trap Vecna.”

Steve’s eyes bugged out of his head.

“Yeah, that’s not happening.”

“It should be me!” you protested. “Max is just a kid! I couldn’t live with myself if this plan fails and…”

You trailed off, not wanting to scare the girl in question—but everyone knew what you meant.

“You don’t have to, Y/N,” Max said. “I’m fine to do it.”

“I know,” you said. “But you’re my sister Grace’s age. Too young to subject yourself to his torture on purpose. Please. I want to help. Let me do this.”

The group shared uneasy looks.

“Y/L/N the Brave,” Eddie said in awe. “I say let them join!”

Dustin, Lucas, and Erica agreed. Max looked two parts guilty and one part relieved and said, “Yeah. They can do it.”

“Are you sure, Y/N?” Nancy asked.

You nodded.

“Then it’s settled,” Robin said. “Max is on bat duty with Eddie and Dustin. Y/N goes with Lucas and Erica to the Creel House—”

“Sinclair,” Steve said, “do you have your wrist rocket?”

“Uh, yeah, always. Why?”

“Are you okay to switch with me, and go with Robin and Nance?”

“Wait,” Nancy said, “hold on, Steve—”

“Absolutely,” Lucas said with a steely, determined gaze. He raised up his slingshot. “Vecna won’t know what hit him when I send a rock through his skull.”

“That’s what I like to hear,” Steve said. “Y/N, I’ll go with you and Erica to the Creel House. Otherwise, the plan stays the same. Got it?”

Everyone agreed to their new roles. You took a deep breath.

“Okay,” you said. “Let’s kill a demon.”

***

Tag List: scenesofobx

A/N One more part to go...

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington fanfic #st fic: elegia #elegia iii #steve harrington #st fanfic

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sunshine-overload · 2 years

Text

[BSTS] Main Story S4CH8 ‘Paradox of the Crumbling Sand Dune’ - EX Chapters

I don’t usually translate main story stuff but shit went down in these chapters lol

EX 1

-starless balcony, nighttime-

kasumi: Good work today~

sotetsu: Hey, good work on your closing performance.

kasumi: Thankfully it went off without a hitch. Man~ It was really rough this time. I caused my team all sorts of trouble as well. I'm glad we managed to salvage things somehow, but still, as a mob I'm quite ashamed.

sotetsu: Well, it's in the past now. By the way, what do you plan to do about Zakuro?

kasumi: I'm not planning to do anything. Zakuro is Team C's singer and my teammate. That's all there is to it.

sotetsu: You're not going to look into it any further than this then?

kasumi: I wouldn't be able to handle it if I poked the bush and a snake came out~ Even if I dealt with the snake, who knows what else may jump out. So what is it you're planning to do, Sotetsu?

sotetsu: I'm of the same opinion as you. For now I don't plan to get involved.

kasumi: That so.

sotetsu: I don't hold a death wish y'know. I get that this is a dangerous matter if touched carelessly. I am genuinely curious as to what's up with Zakuro's body though.

kasumi: ......

sotetsu: Rather, if it turns out Zakuro actually has a twin, what would you think about that?

kasumi: You’re saying what if he switched places with his older or younger twin brother? No matter how you put it, something like that's impossible. Even if they look identical, once you talk to them a bit you would be able to tell it's a different person.

sotetsu: Right? I know I suggested it, but even I think it's a nonsense theory.

kasumi: .......

kasumi: I know right. I think it's a fitting way to end this silly chat.

—end

—

EX 2

cw: gun violence

-starless lobby-

saki: (It’s gotten quite late, usually I leave earlier…)

kongou: Are you heading home Saki-chan? Shall I escort you to the station?

gui: I’ll be escorting her.

kongou: I see, I won’t have to worry if Gui’s with you then.

gui: —Master?

kongou: Hm? Did something happen?

gui: Master is close by. I have to go.

-gui runs off-

saki: There he goes…

kongou: In that case I’ll esc—

-haseyama appears-

kongou: Oh, Owner, good work today.

haseyama: The little lady hasn’t gone home yet?

saki: Ah, yes, I was about to head home now actually…

haseyama: A young woman like you shouldn’t walk around at night by herself. Oi, Kongou! Walk her to the station.

kongou: Of course. Please wait a moment for me, Saki-chan. I’ll go get changed right away.

saki: Thank you, sorry for the trouble.

-kongou leaves-

haseyama: Jeez, they’re all just a bunch of inconsiderate bastards ain't they. By the way, I heard Team C had quite a messy dispute. It must have been one awful performance huh?

saki: That’s not true, it was an amazing show! It was set in such a mysterious world that you couldn’t help but get invested…

haseyama: ……

saki: … Owner-san?

haseyama: Ah, my bad. You just reminded me of someone I know, you’re similar.

saki: (Someone similar to me…?)

kongou: Thanks for waiting, shall we get going?

haseyama: Be careful getting home.

saki: Yes, then—…..

-strange man appears suddenly, grabbing saki-

saki: !?

???: Sorry, but I’m going to have you come with me for a bit.

haseyama: What the hell are you doing!

kongou: Saki-chan!

-kongou and the man fight-

kongou: Ugh….! Let go of her!

???: My, you’re a tough one.

-they keep fighting-

kongou: Gah…..!

-kongou falls to the ground-

saki: Kongou-san!

haseyama: Tch, you bastard!

-haseyama or ??? pull out a gun, I’m unsure which-

saki: (A gun….!)

haseyama: Don’t even think about it!

???: ….Hm.

-haseyama gets shot-

haseyama: Gah…!

saki: (screams)

kongou: Ugh… Owner…!

haseyama: Run… little lady….

???: If you want her back then come after me.

kongou: Hey…! Wait!

???: Just don’t inform the police about this. If you carelessly make a ruckus about it then I cannot assure you this woman’s safety.

kongou: Shit! Somebody! Somebody come here!

-strange man takes saki away, screen goes black-

saki: (How could… how could something like this happen…)

—end

—

EX 3

-unei’s office-

kei: You’re all here then.

mizuki: You’re so slow, if this is for something stupid I’m gonna smack you one.

kokuyou: Stop it, Mizuki.

mokuren: ……

rindou: Did something happen, Kei?

kei: I’ll keep it brief— Haseyama has been shot.

mokuren: The owner was!?

kokuyou: No way…

kei: I don’t know their intentions but… There is no doubt that this was a crime committed by someone skilled. Kongou, who happened to be present at the time, fought back with all he could but was ultimately defeated.

mizuki: Was Kongou hurt!?

kei: Just some body bruises. He’s at the hospital just to be safe, but they shouldn’t be anything to worry about.

rindou: How is the owner’s condition…?

kei: He managed to escape death. However he has still not regained consciousness and his condition remains unpredictable.

kokuyou: …So, what are we gonna do?

kei: I want to avoid getting the police involved in this incident. Therefore I will not be making a report. So, in order to not make this incident public, it will be business as usual from tomorrow onwards.

mokuren: Do you plan to hide this from Princess too?

kei: —Saki was… kidnapped by this same perpetrator.

mokuren: What?

rindou: Saki-san was…!?

kei: If we make noise of this incident then Saki will be in danger. This is all for her sake.

mizuki: Huh? This ain't the time to be sitting around the store!

mokuren: I agree. We should shut the store and all go and search for her.

kokuyou: Wow, didn’t think you’d prioritise her over the stage.

mokuren: You expect me to prioritise the store over someone that’s disappeared? You’ve misjudged me, Kokuyou.

rindou: But it’s a simple matter. If we want to prioritise her safety then we should entrust this matter to the police. If you report it now it may be too late…

kei: It appears the perpetrator left us a message. It was “If you inform the police about this then the woman’s safety cannot be assured.”

rindou: No way….

kei: Besides, aren't you also well aware that the police can’t be relied on?

rindou: …….

mizuki: The cops are all shit, they can’t be trusted, right Kokuyou?

kokuyou: More or less.

kei: I am going to go over the known information more carefully here. For now you can have a break. Meet back here in 15 minutes. I will go over a more concrete plan of action then.

rindou: Understood… I’m going to go and cool my head for a bit.

mizuki: Man… fuck this!

mokuren: ……

-everyone else leaves the room-

kei: …….

kei: Saki… I pray that you are unhurt. I’ll definitely get you back, I swear it…!

—end

#bsts main story #bsts gui's master #dun dun dun #bsts translation

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inourtownofhawkins · 1 year

Text

@eddiesbuttcheeks

Miles,

I know you’ll most likely ignore this message and tell the entire server an edited version of events, since that’s what you did when I DMed you on Twitter, but I don’t care what you do. I have screenshots of fucking EVERYTHING so don’t try to spin this shit.

In the short time I’ve known you, I literally have never seen a fully grown adult demand so much attention from a bunch of strangers on the internet. To the point where if anyone else said anything, it was irrelevant to them. But your word was gospel.

The amount of gaslighting you and your friends did when I said to you PERSONALLY that I felt like I was ignored and unwelcomed was insane. I could recount so many instances of where I was straight up ignored, but your friends said, “so many people talk, messages get lost”. Please, I have literally been in servers with more members and that are more active than yours and nobody’s messages were so blatantly ignored than many people’s in your server.

I would literally just post something in main, but everyone else would be practically having an orgy in the NSFW chat or selfies. Which, by the way, is not a normal way to talk to your friends. You shouldn’t want to fuck every single one of your friends, and you shouldn’t surround yourself with people who literally faun at your feet. That’s not reality.

But on top of those things; your apology you posted before deleting your whole account. You called yourself a victim – a victim of what exactly? This is why I know you have a victim complex because every single person who is genuinely a victim of something would never say “I am a victim; I’m not just acting like it” but then never say what they’re a victim of. If you were genuinely a victim of anything, you would never need to say you're a victim.

You also blame your BPD, which you say is undiagnosed but have brought it up constantly. Either you get diagnosed or you stop talking about a mental illness you think you have from googling your symptoms or other people have lead you to believe you have.

For whatever reason in that apology, you told people to go to you if you’ve hurt them to talk it out. But yet, you ignored my Twitter DM which was an opportunity to talk things out like adults. You knew my Twitter, Discord and Tumblr, you had multiple days to reach out and apologise and talk it out, but instead you told your friends an edited version of what I had said, leaving out key details and made me seem like the bad person when I literally DMed you privately to avoid drama and to hopefully be able to talk it out like actual fucking adults but clearly you never want to do that.

In your newest bio you claim to also have autism, yet I have asked a couple of people who have actually known you and none of them have told me that you’ve mentioned having autism. If you truly have both BPD and autism, you’re not stable enough to even be on the internet with the way you’re acting and reacting to things.

As someone who does have autism but never broadcasts it, I’m fucking ashamed that someone as old as you is acting like a fucking child. Grow the fuck up and stop thinking you’re gods gift when you’re not. You’re giving people with autism a bad name and it’s fucking embarrassing.

The reason why so many people don’t like you is because you’re a selfish, manipulative asshole who puts up the act of being this dude who gets bitches, when in reality all the bitches you get are your just as hypocritical friends.

I don’t give a fuck if your friends hate me and harass me; I can see you for who you truly are while their rose-tinted glasses only get foggier. And I know I’m far from the only person who feels this way.

I would say “I hope you realise how much you’re hurting people” but frankly, you’re a lost cause.

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commaclear · 2 years

Note

I think don’t think I know what I’m doing right now since l it’s four am, but here is my Sally analysis

Ig to start, Sally really seems to crave domesticity, love, and family. And no fucking shit. She told their son all about what Wilbur did just because he told her that he didn’t wanna try a relationship again with her. He didn’t say they couldn’t still be a family even if it’s gonna change. He simply said he would rather not date her again.

I’ve seen the whole “is she homophobic?” Thing. The answer is no. She isn’t homophobic. She is simply upset that Wilbur loves someone else more than he ever loved her in all the time they were together. In her eyes she spent 12(?) years trying to make things work and trying to create a perfect family that she could tell her friends and family about without feeling a bit ashamed. She believes she put so much effort in and the fact that Wilbur chooses to throw all the effort away without a second thought is genuinely upsetting to her.

I think the difference between Wilbur and Sally in regards to their relationship ending is that Wilbur might have a bunch of not so fun memories from their marriage, he still cherishes the moments that were genuinely good and wouldn’t change a thing because at least he has Fundy. Sally, however, has a bunch of memories of her trying and things never going as planned, and she doesn’t easily separate the fact that there are truly amazing memories there because she wanted memories with her family, not just her child and a man who doesn’t care about her. If you were to ask Sally “if you could go back with what you know now and change things, would you do it?” I truly believe that she would say she would. That way she could’ve had a kid at an appropriate age with someone who loved her and the perfect life that she had wished for from a young age.

She’s embarrassed too. There is so much disapproval when it comes to teen pregnancy, even when the father stays in the picture. There is criticism from friends, family, and strangers that you don’t even care about. Everyone wants to tell you that you aren’t ready to raise a child. They want to tell you that your relationship won’t last. They want to tell you that you are being irresponsible and fucking up both you and your child’s life permanently. But she fully believed that they were different and even though they were young, they loved each other and that’s all that mattered. She ignored what everyone else told her to do and stayed with Wilbur and carried out the pregnancy anyways.

Not to mention the fact that her dad wrote a prenup for their marriage with an infidelity clause. At the time it hasn’t meant anything but after Wilbur cheated it just meant her dad was right. Everyone was right. She made bad decisions and failed. And Wilbur was planning on running away from everything too.

How do you even explain to your friends and family that your husband cheated on you, planned on leaving you and his kid, moved back in with his dad, got custody, and is also gay? The answer is you don’t. You say you split up and that’s it. Because if she told the truth then she was the fool who married an unfaithful, disloyal, immature man who wasn’t capable of being completely attracted to her.

She probably scolds herself now. She wants to know how she didn’t see it sooner. She envied the way that Wilbur and Quackity acted at the hospital. He was never comfortable doing that with her, so how was this any difference?

Not to mention the whole Fundy thing. She loves Fundy, definitely. But I think she loves the idea of a picture perfect family more. If a parent truly cared about their child, they would refrain from making the other parent look bad. I’m not even sure Sally would even know what to do with full custody. I mean Wilbur didn’t either tbf. But I think sally has gotten to the point that it’s no longer what’s best for Fundy but what will give her the last laugh. The final win. If she cannot have Wilbur, then Wilbur shouldn’t get the satisfaction of having Fundy too. She didn’t stay in that marriage for hat long to lose every part of it.

And maybe she’s scared of Quackity replacing her in a way. The way that he showed up at the hospital, not just to support Wilbur, but Fundy too. She probably had a thought of “who did he call first?” The way he had rushed to comfort Wilbur after she had confronted him at the bar. She hated how much more patient Quackity was.

And maybe this has something to do with her childhood. Maybe she grew up in a home where her parents were divorced or always fought and she felt ignored so she swore to herself that she wouldn’t be them. She swore this would be different and her and Wilbur wouldn’t ever let their occasional disagreements affect their son. And that’s why she wants to go back to normal. She tries to plan things so that they will work out (which is common with kids from dysfunctional families) and then when they don’t go her way she gets upset.

This was much longer than intended. Also ngl. I lowkey kinda sympathize with her. I mean she definitely is not who I’m routing for but I think if she did less bitch maneuvers and was more empathetic then maybe I’d consider.

-The Quackity Analysis Anon

As always, quackity analysis anon, this is frickin' immaculate. Couldn't have said it better myself

#anons my beloved #hi thirsty im dad #quackity analysis anon

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ladykailolu · 1 year

Text

Sometimes Gyro and Johnny get a little fresh and frisky in the stables and make love on piles of hay or on the floor in front of Slow Dancer and Valkyrie lol

Then they fall asleep in the stables and jolt awake, scrambling to find their clothes when they hear their oldest daughters already up and approaching the stables.

Gyro is the first to sense that someone is approaching. “Wait, I know that sound....Oh shit! It’s Paxe! Those footsteps are Paxe’s, and they’re coming right over here!”

“What are you talking about? I don’t hear anything.” Johnny says. He rubs the sleep out of his eyes and watches Gyro dress himself in a panic.

“What are you doing? Get your clothes on! If she catches me here doing this with you, I’m dead!”

“Gyro, we’re already married.” Johnny pulled on his pants and fiddled with the buttons, but it was far too slow for Gyro’s tastes.

“I know, but,”--the footsteps were getting closer, Gyro had to act--“Oh shit...!” Without thinking, Gyro threw bunches of hay on Johnny, slowly covering his half-naked body in a small mountain of it.

“Gyro--!”

“Just for a little while! Be still, pretend that you aren’t here!”

“...” Fuming, Johnny obeyed and stayed quiet.

The door opened and Paxe entered with a huff, hands on her hips and feet planted firmly on the ground. “Where have you been?” She started and stared Gyro down. “Julia has been crying non-stop and it’s driving me crazy! You never told me where you keep her food, so I came out here looking for you. What are you doing anyway, and what happened to your shirt?”

“Nothing, don’t worry about it.” Gyro felt exposed, ashamed and silly for being shirtless in front of his daughter, but she didn’t seem to catch on yet. He forced himself to look away from Johnny still hidden a few feet to his right. Paxe rolled her eyes and didn’t question it further.

“And where is Johnny? He usually takes care of Julia anyway.”

Like nails grating on chalkboard, it occurred to Gyro that Paxe never referred to Johnny as her father. She called him by his first name only and nothing else no matter how many times Gyro reminded her that she has two dads now. Paxe never accepted it.

Poor girl. She must still miss her mother.

“School is about to start soon.” Gyro countered and moved toward her, shooing her away to the door. “Get your books. Now. I’ll take care of Julia. And play nice with the other kids today. I don’t want to hear you had another fight with a boy.”

“Well maybe if he knew what was good for him, he would stay in his place and not bother me.”

And so Paxe left to gather her school supplies, but Gyro didn’t follow her just yet. Once he closed the door, he turned back to the haystack and dug Johnny out of it.

“She’s a handful.” Johnny said and pulled his shirt over himself.

“Now you know what I mean when I said she’s a pain in the ass at times.”

“You can’t blame her though. She gets all that aggression from you.” That comment earned Johnny a glare from Gyro.

“Wise-ass.” Still, Gyro leaned in and kissed Johnny.

#gyjo #gyro zeppeli #johnny joestar #jjba #Paxe Amalia Zeppeli #jjba oc #the bastard Zeppeli children #the bastard zeppeli daughters #julia joestar-zeppeli

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skyetorrin · 2 years

Text

Whumptober 2022 - Prompt No. 1

Prompt No 1: A Little Out Of The Ordinary

Adverse Effects | Unconventional Restraints | “This Wasn’t Supposed To Happen.”

Summary: Loki gets shot during an Avengers mission.

Content Warnings: Blood (not detailed), Genocide (mentioned), Gun Shot Wound (not detailed), Medical Injection (brief, not detailed), Negative Self Talk (semi-detailed), Racism (mentioned), Swearing (minor)

@whumptober-archive

Also posted on ao3 here.

“Brother! Watch out!” Thor yelled. Loki turned to look at him but before he could he was hit in the abdomen with a bullet. He collapsed, and Thor rushed over. “Banner! My brother has been shot!”

“Shit. Bring him to the quinjet as fast as you can.” Bruce rushed around the quinjet, trying to find the medical supplies. He managed to find a couple of gauze pads and some standard level painkillers.

“Wait did you say Rock of Ages has been shot?” Tony cursed. “Alright we’ll be back to the quinjet in 10.”

They rushed quickly back to the tower in the quinjet, Bruce holding pressure on the wound in Loki’s abdomen.

“Quick! Someone get the asgardian medicine. He’s crashing!” Bruce yelled, his skin tinged green on the edges.

Doctors rushed into the room where they had brought Loki, trying to get everything they needed, all while the rest of the team was waiting anxiously outside. Loki seized on the table, prompting Bruce to inject him with the medicine the other doctors finally retrieved.

Loki stopped seizing at the same time that a dark blue color started to cover his body. Markings slowly appeared on his skin and it grew colder, causing Bruce to step back and call in Thor.

“Thor? Do you know what’s happening?”

“Oh norns.” Thor shook his head. “This is my brother’s original form. He is most ashamed of it.” Loki started stirring behind them, making Thor and Bruce snap back to where Loki was laying.

“How are you feeling Loki?” Bruce asked as he checked his vitals.

“Like I shot by a bunch of HYDRA soldiers.” He deadpanned, blinking his eyes open.

“That would be expected.” Bruce hesitated before continuing. “Listen Loki, you were seizing so we had to give you some medication because you lost so much blood. Unfortunately, the medicine was something we had synthesized for Thor so it had some, unusual side effects on you.”

“What do you mean?” Loki attempted to sit up, growling when he realized he was too weak.

“It may have accidentally reverted you back to your frost giant form but I swear it wasn’t supposed to do that.” Loki looked down at where his arms were resting, his breath picking up when he realized he was in fact in his frost giant form.

“I’m a monster.” He whispered, breath shaky. He was in full blown panic by the time Bruce opened his mouth to speak.

“Thor I think it would be more beneficial if you waited outside. I’ll talk to Loki.” Bruce slowly walked over to where Loki was laying, shaking and staring up at the ceiling. “Can I touch you?”

Loki shook his head. “You’ll get hurt if you do. I told you. I’m a monster.”

“Okay I won’t touch you. But you aren’t a monster Loki.”

“Just look at me! I’m hideous. My eyes are blood red and my skin looks terrifying.” Loki sobbed out, attempting to sit up once more.

“Loki, you’re talking to someone who turns into a giant green being on the regular.” Bruce pointed out. “If they don’t hate me, then they won’t hate you.”

Loki shook his head. “Thor will. He hates frost giants. Wanted them all dead. Thought they were monsters. They are monsters.”

Bruce froze, mouth gaping as he took in this information. “I’m going to be right back okay Loki?” Loki nodded his head, but didn’t say anything else. Bruce stepped outside and took a second to regain his composure.

“Banner! How is he? Can I see him?” Thor popped up out of the seat he was currently residing in once he saw that Bruce had exited the room.

“I don’t know if that's a good idea Thor. His mental stability is really low right now and quite frankly I think you would just make it worse.”

“What do you mean Banner?”

“Well…” Bruce paused, trying to figure out how to tell Thor his baby brother probably wouldn’t want to see him because of the mass genocide Thor wanted to commit against frost giants. “He’s afraid you think he’s a monster.”

With that, Bruce turned around and heading back into the room where Loki was. “I told your brother you probably wouldn’t want to see him right now, I hope thats okay.”

Loki simply nodded and said a soft “thank you” before turning away from Bruce.

Loki ended up staying in the medical room for the next few days until he finally had enough energy to move around. Then he moved back to his room in the Avengers tower and hid in there. He made sure to avoid Thor and the other Avengers, only allowing Bruce in his room.

“You should talk to your brother Loki.” Bruce mentioned one day when they were eating lo mien from the Chinese restaurant across the street.

“I don’t want to. Not like this.”

“He cares about you, and he’s doesn’t have the same views he did as a child.” Loki sighed, putting the chopsticks into the container and setting it down on the table.

“Will it get you to stop pestering me?”

“Yes.”

“Fine. Jarvis, can you call Thor for me?”

“Of course Reindeer Games.” Loki swore under his breath.

“Norns. I forgot Tony’s penchant for ridiculous nicknames.” Loki sat back with a sigh, picking his noodles back up. If he was going to have to talk to his brother he was going to at least have his noodles with him.

Thor burst into the room, a large grin on his face. “Brother! I was beginning to think you hated me.”

“If you keep yelling I might.” Loki continued to eat his noodles, making it a point to stare anywhere but Thor.

“Banner told me you thought I would hate you for this?” Loki could only nod as he tried to keep the gradual tears from spilling out. “I do not hate you brother. I could never hate you. It was wrong of me in our youth to hate frost giants so. I have learned much in my time with the Avengers.”

It was then than Loki lost his war with his mental stability, tears finally flowing down his face. “Can I hug you brother?” Loki nodded, and Thor quickly enveloped him. The blue in Loki’s skin started slowly receding and the red in his eyes faded.

Loki looked to where Bruce was still sitting, the shock on Loki’s face clear. Bruce gave an encouraging nod and Loki clutched on to Thor even tighter. “I love you brother. Blue skin or not.”

“You really mean that?”

“I do.”

“Thank you.” Loki breathed out, still clutching tightly to Thor.

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gurugirl · 6 months

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Hey! I came here to say exactly what the anon who didn’t love pitting women against women said. I loved part one and the idea that it would be a fun, sexy threesome with interesting power dynamics.

I totally understand that you are writing for requests and I think your writing is great! I did wonder if your readers/requesters ever stop to think about why they fantasise about men in a way that involves other women getting hurt though. I understand a lot of people here are young and have very little relationship experience but that kind of thing will not serve you well friends! If you were in this exact situation and a man ended up leaving his wife for you, you would forever know that he was capable of doing that to you too. Getting men at the expense of women is something you will eventually feel shame about.

Also wanted to question where the data for most people regretting threesomes comes from. You said that’s “actually the reality” but I’ve never seen a study or anything. I’d be interested to look at threesomes that didn’t involve any kind of coercion or people going along with something they didn’t really want because they wouldn’t speak up.

I’ve had a bunch of threesomes and they were just fun. I’m in a throuple now that started as a threesome so always interested in people who say this.

I think this fiction isn’t just another “women being pitted against each other” - I didn’t say anything on the last one but that’s not what this is about. Nor is it about a woman getting a man at the expense of his wife.

I see what you both feel on this but let’s just remember this isn’t real not is it based on something I hope will happen.

Asking us to question why we want this kind of fantasy to read? Okay.. we could get into the psychology of that thing. Most of us do have some trauma that maybe we use as a way to feel like we have control of the narrative. For me, that’s it. I write a lot of problematic shit because I love feeling power over the narrative and getting to do what I want in the realms of written fiction that hurts zero people (as long as they’re reading the warnings and mature enough to decide what content they consume).

As a grown grown woman - I’m talking older than you very likely - I like this sort of thing. Should I feel ashamed for it?? I don’t think so. I’ve come a long way in my life and I’m not perfect but I have a very wide understanding of people. I’ve had all kinds of sexual encounters and I do write many things from experience or from how I have personally felt during things.

I’m not here to broadcast all healthy and positive relationships. I’m just writing. This isn’t a place to come and learn or take advice or model your life after. I’m writing for you guys for free on tumblr and just having fun.

As for data on where I heard about people not thriving after a threesome? This is more specific to a unicorn situation - not just people having threesomes. I’m very happy for you that for you it has worked out when you’re invited into an existing relationship (or maybe you and your partner have invited someone new in and it worked?)- I’ve not seen actual data about this (are there actual published studies? Couldn’t find any) but there is plenty of anecdotal evidence (stories from people who have been in this situation - again involved in a unicorn type scenario).

Appreciate your thoughts but please don’t take this so seriously that you feel you need to make someone feel shame for a fantasy that they might have. Maybe you didn’t intend that but I’m re reading your ask and that’s exactly what it feels like you’re saying to me.

Xoxo

#ask

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bisluthq · 7 months

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Re: Holivia break-up. I’m ashamed about how long this might be 🫣

I don’t think her kids were meant to be a hail mary. I think she just took them or even went so it didn’t look like she was completely exiled after they broke up. There’s also a picture of some kids running around earlier while he rehearses.

I do think the Nanny affected their relationship more than DWD ever could and I mostly think it’s because it was now all out there and not a private matter. I don’t necessarily think he found out anything new about her and/or her situation with Jason. Harry is just not used to things being that messy and I think he could remove himself from DWD because it ended up being boiled down to a cat fight between the two women rather than 2 grown adults having an issue after working together. Nonetheless, I think a lot of this was also avoidable had Olivia just gone mute. I understand she’d never had this type of attention and it’s all negative but you are literally dating the king of just nod and smile, and you’ve clearly seen how it works for him so why not copy?

If none of this happened, I now see they probably still wouldn’t have worked. Moving to London just felt like a pipe dream. If it didn’t work for Halle Berry, it wouldn’t work for Olivia. Idk if Harry would have moved back to LA.

I think the thing I really wonder about is the Emrata situation. Most people seem to think that Deuxmoi pulled their information out of their ass but she really got it from a podcaster who is friends with Olivia’s friend/accquintance who posted the shady ig story about Emrata after the kiss. The podcaster doesn’t explicitly say who told him but they were hanging out before/after it happened. He basically says that they were on a break and Olivia knew she really couldn’t police his movement and didn’t really mind him sleeping around because “out of sight , out of mind” but that they were actively still in contact like even before he went out that night and like after and he never mentioned anything about it. The guy also says that Emrata and Olivia hung out when they were in the same place (+ Em started hanging out with her yummy mummy nyc crew) and like Em did the whole “fuck him; you’re better than that” routine only to go and do that. The guy did say Em half-assed apologised like sorry that hurt you and he says that Em told Olivia that she thought she was more sexually open/fluid so wouldn’t mind at all. He did say that was her last straw though (to me, basically confirmed to her that their feelings were probably just not the same). I don’t know how true all of this is but I know it did hurt her because she was MIA for a week after the vid dropped.

Note: Emrata did address the situation and she brought up Adam Levine but people read it so wrong. I think on the surface it looks like she’s saying don’t pit women against each other but the reading it with the Adam name drop basically said “why are you not attacking the man too?” since Sumner got most of the lashings.

tbf I don’t think anyone is used to anything being that messy. That’s sorta my point. I don’t think I’d stay with someone who has kids and an asshole baby daddy and people spilling all that shit even in like our social lives, not even to the whole world. Like I think I’d peace the fuck outta there. I also agree he didn’t necessarily learn a whole bunch of new info but it being so public just wasn’t cool. And I kinda think he did learn a bit of new info lol - at minimum he learned the nanny was overly invested in everything.

EmRata wasn’t a very good friend lol but I also feel like she didn’t do anything super wrong.

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missing-wires · 1 year

Text

Hmm… suddenly I feel the strange need to clarify things. It’s like I have this nagging itch that I can’t quite scratch.

I am not ashamed of what happened to me when I was 13 years old. It was an accident. I was just a dumb, horny kid who didn’t know any better. I have never shamed you or shared any of your childhood trauma with anyone, ever. It would be a strong false equivalence to compare your camming to my penile fracture.

Yes, I shared some things with someone back in October, but hardly anything. He didn’t come to know anything of substance until late January, which was long after you had been sharing my shit with a bunch of randos, including teenagers, which I found to be in very poor taste. The man I shared things with is married and a respectable person and someone with whom you already had a dialogue. Again, this is a major false equivalence.

It’s not even that you shared with people. Believe me, I would have shared myself. It’s like, why? Why did you feel the need to? Just too juicy to pass up? Because we hadn’t seen each other in person and it was easy to continue pretending like I was a robot? That’s a cop out.

I mean I’m not like surprised or anything lol. I thought about sharing all the screenshots of private convos you sent me. After all, if she does it with others, you can bet she does it with you. No one’s immune from it. I am not that special. Any opportunity for conversational fodder, right? Any opportunity to control a narrative.

I am a very forgiving person, especially among people I care about, perhaps, in part, because it’s rare that I care about people at at all.

I recognize that I put you in a uniquely, awkward position, but I thought your gaslighting and your complete unwillingness to admit to any betrayal of trust was extreme. I did my very best to convey that I wouldn’t care at all, and you were super persistent to the point of anger that I would even imply that you had told others. You called me paranoid and “MK ultra brained” and later seemed to half admit to it but blamed it on PTSD.

I was just very frustrated that you were so flippant with me. I barely even tried to talk to you since October. I was content with a slow, chill pace. I felt like i got sort of a second lease or whatever. But I guess something happened along the way. You met someone else and I became conversational fodder. I was happy to end things at the New Year, but I guess you didn’t like that and had to drag your pet back in.

And again, I have said this before, but I never intellectualized my feelings toward you. Of course, things can change, in the event we got to know each other, face to face. I recognize that. I felt extremely patronized that you would insinuate that a face to face meeting was equivalent to a marriage proposal.

I think the glass house metaphor in the context of the song is a very poor one. You don’t have anything on me. There is no “thing” I am afraid of sharing with anyone. That 13 year old kid died a long time ago. When you laugh at my fracture, you’re not laughing at me, you’re laughing at him. That little conversation I had with Ric was about “shaking the bushes.” I got exactly what I needed out of that.

It was never about the thing, or even the sharing. It was that you repeatedly lied and lied and lied about it again and again. Fuck you for that.

Believe me, I could give two shits what your dweeb friends think about me or their interpretation of your warped narrative. I know what it really feels like to want to die, and any other feeling pales by comparison. If anyone has a problem about it, they can come see me.

*Removed records, not because I’m ashamed of it, it’s just a little tacky to leave up in perpetuity lol. Hopefully this is it. Edited-Midnight 5/8/23

#Spotify

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