#I think we're getting better but whoa boy...
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Ok, if you don't want to engage in some (queer) tin foiling... scroll away.
So first off, I think this song rules. It was one of the few that I let just vibe instead of doing what my brain usually does, which is scrutinize lyrics/marvel over the layers of meaning. It feels like it has Kill Bill energy and that was good enough for me.
My Albatross variation of the TTPD vinyl showed up yesterday — TTPD is perhaps the best her team has done btw — and was pouring over the lyrics last night and paused on I Can Fix Him (No, Really I Can) in particular.
The last line has been one that most people have chuckled at. Like she spent a whole song building up this menacing conceit: "this boy is bad news, but he can't hold a candle to me — I'll handle him." Only to be like, lol jk at the end.
But seeing that last line written out this way scratched at my brain... she really doesn't scream that line at all. Why is it in all caps? And while we're at it... I mean it's an accepted spelling, but technically the incorrect spelling of 'whoa.' It kind of felt, by putting it in caps, like she was calling attention to it. Was it an acronym? Not that I could tell.
But... just to double check... how had she spelled woah/whoa prior? The only song I could think of off the top of my head to check was Better Than Revenge. When reading her lyrics you really wont find 99% of the "whoas" in her discography written because they're more like instrumentals.
And that right there is a "whoa." Of course my eyes twitched at the matching colors of the two vids, but I'll get to that. And then I was only able to find one more written "whoa."
Ok, cool.
But back to Better Than Revenge... It struck me that something had been "fixed" about the song. The famous "she's better known for things that she's done on the mattress" line had been swapped out in the rerecording for "he was a moth to the flame she was holding the matches."
So I looked back at I Can Fix Him... could this be a joke/hint about "fixing" him. Like fixing the pronouns? "WOAH" is an intentional misspelling just by comparing it to her own body of work. But it would be rather clever if the "he" she's referring to (at least on this one layer of the song) was her use of that pronoun in her work. It would make the lines "I can fix him / No, really, I can / And only I can" make even more sense, imo. She's the author of this music and she's rerecording it/making it.
What's more is that the collaged flower in the lyric booklet and the aesthetic of the lyric video are giving me um... big Reputation vibes?
Hey kids, spelling is FUN! Am I absolutely living in delulu thinking that Reputation could also be "fixed" re: pronouns? Oh, I don't doubt it. But I needed to get this out of my brain, out into the world, and let the chips fall as they may and always do.
And at least Taylor Nation is also in on the joke...
#i can fix him (no really i can)#gaylor#the tortured poets department the anthology#TTPD#reputation tv#pronouns#hey kids spelling is fun!#WOAH!#*WHOA
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The thing is, you don’t have to have a diagnoses to make simple “unmasking” changes that make your life easier. You don’t even have to self-diagnose! You are not appropriating anyone’s culture or struggles or hijacking anyone’s movement by allowing yourself to sway in line at the grocery store or buying a weighted blanket or using study or household hacks intended for people with ADHD. If you start favoring the needs that make your brain and body unique over the arbitrary norms of society, you’ll be better off, and you’ll be expanding the norms. It’s a win/win.
#sometimes I consider What I Have Going On Upstairs#and think 'should I try to get some sort of diagnosis?'#but it wouldn't help me right now! I don't need work accomodations - work IS the accomodation#but allowing myself to sit on the floor in the corner of the airport instead of on a chair#or fidget in lines#gives me one less thing to worry about AND makes my brain happy AND makes 'odd' but harmless behaviors#more normalized which ultimately helps people#who have needs that are several standard deviations away from ~~normal~~#it's a win-win-win#tam.txt#related but on a different line of thinking:#somewhere along the line we majorly screwed up with how we talk about appropriation#I think we're getting better but whoa boy...#seen some baffling takes about pretty normal things like socializing color codes for get-togethers#or weighted blankets#being Only For Autistic People#nah bro that's the last thing on earth the vast majority of disability advocates are interested in
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Oh to make out with omi omi like it’s so messy and hot and surprisingly he love it too. Maybe one day u are having drinks and things get heated. OMGGG a roommate au fuckkkkk my mind goes burrrrrrrrrr
NO FRR needy omi makes me go brrrr
I'M SO SORRY FOR NOT WRITTING THIS SOONER
WARNINGS: 17+, BONER ALERT!!, drinking
Friday nights with your roomate weren't unusual. The two of you often going to the fanciest bars in Tokyo with the best views. You'll have to thank the Volleyball Association for his hefty paycheck. The two of you didn't get to see each other often between you pursuing your master's degree, Kiyoomi traveling and his tough practice schedules. The most interaction you guys have had in the pass month was passing him in the hallways. Him always being half dead and you... well you weren't in the best shape as well.
So you decided that the last friday of the month was Omi and Y/N time. While you wanted to spend this time showing him how greatful you are he took you in, omi had the idea of going to "better" establishments. By better he means 3 star michelin restaurants... the ones you can't afford.
Yes, it was nice to see that his name allowed the two of you to experience these beautiful places, but as of lately these seemed more like dates rather than two roommates catching up. Not that your opposed to a date with Omi. Have you seen his body? But he's seen you at your worse. Crying to him at the bar in Ongiri Miya about how your getting evicted from your apartment and how your behind on loan payments. He's seen you sick and begging for him to get you toilet paper. If anything he probably takes you to these places to be his wing woman.
One too many drinks later, and the two of your are stumbling out of the restaurant to his luxurious car. Kiyoomi was much better at hiding his drunkenness than you where. The street lamps were just dim enough to hide the pink dusting his cheeks.
All of your weight pressed into his side while he attempted to keep you upright. "Y/N you need to work with me," the taller man grunts before decides to lift you up over his shoulder. "we need to go home," he breaths into the chill night air.
"whoa, big boy take me on a date first," you giggle into his back. Hitting one of his butt cheeks with the palm of your hand.
You're flipped back upright once you reach his car. He opens the back door and tosses you in. It takes a moment for your brain to register that he got in next to you. "why aren't you driving?" you question, laying your head on his shoulder.
"I'm drunk...gonna wait till I sober up a bit," he states closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. Always so responsible. "Also we live together, and that was a date, so I wouldn't be in the wrong," he says sternly looking down at you.
Popping your head up you look at him with furrowed brows. "what do you mean that was a date?"
"Was it not?" He questions, more so to himself than to you. While Kiyoomi is lost in his own thoughts yours run wilding thinking of all the times the two of you have gone out like this. He never said any of these were dates...
You watch as Kiyoomi's adam's apple bobs in his throat. If his face wasn't flushed enough it's clear now. His ears bright red as he stutters out his next words. "d-did you not want this to be a date?"
Did he really think these were all dates? You attempt to look at him in the eyes, yet his fail to meet yours. His head remains looking at the window leaving you with only the view of his red ear. Memories flood your mind in attempt to find the word date leave his mouth during any of your plans. Yet all you can remember are the times Kiyoomi was left stressed he wouldn't have time to shower and change, how he spent an abnormally long time on his hair, or how he always would sneak his card to the waiter so he paid for your meal.
"Hey, look at me," you whisper, lightly moving his chin to face you. His pupils widen over his already dark eyes making them look like perfect tapioca pearls. "we're these all dates?" did you want these to all be dates? Kiyoomi nods his head slowly, and you drop your hand from his face. Unwanted touch was not the man's specialty, yet his hand drops to yours. Placing it back on his cheek, as he looks into your eyes.
"I didn't know how to ask you, and I definitely drank to much tonight," his face flushes more as he rubs your hand softly. "Miya told me to ask you tonight, but i was.."
"Kiyoomi you can say you were nervous," you whisper in the dark car inches from his face.
"never," he smirks. That's something you can tease him about tomorrow. You want nothing more then to kiss the stupidly handsome man. "didn't think you'd like me.. you know with my habits," he states barely loud enough to hear.
"how can I not, at least i know you don't have shit stains," you giggle, leaning closer, noses almost touching. He giggles with you, a sound you don't get to hear often. The deep breath he takes is almost enough of a distraction for you to miss the way his eyes flicker down to your lips.
"Kiyoomi"
"huh" he responds on autopilot.
"do you wanna kiss me?" you ask, eyes widening like that of a doe.
"may I?" the gentleman in him asks. Not even a second later your leaning completely into him. Leaving a soft kiss on his lips. His eyes remain shut after you seperate. Your nose still touching his, a small smile escapes as you lean in to kiss him longer. His hand comes to rest on your neck to push you futher into him. You may have broken Kiyoomi.
He bites your lower lip as his hand leaves your neck to wrap around your body while his other hand grabs your thigh to help situate you on his lap. Both of your hands hold his face as you deepen the kiss. You can't help, but strattle him while your tongues explore each others mouths. It's mess and sloppy as saliva drips from the corner of your mouth. His large palms move under your dress to kneed your ass. Your not even sure this is your Kiyoomi with the way his hand slaps, strach that, spikes your ass. Kneading the flesh before repeating the action. Your left unbuttoning his shirt as he begins to trail kisses down your neck. His hands go to waist to push your heat to his hard on.
They were right, it's always the quiet ones.
Your hands tangle in his hair as your left grinding onto him. At this point your dress is bunched up around your waist, allowing Kiyoomi's hands to play with the string of your thong.
Kiyoomi's deep breaths lead you on as you kiss down his neck. "y/n, y/n, not here," he breathlessly rasps. He hears your whine as you grind a little harder into him. He laughs before bringing your face to look at him. His hairs a mess, shirt halfway unbottoned, and his breathless. What god do you have to thank for this sight.
#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader#sakusa kiyoomi x reader#kiyoomi sakusa#sakusa#sakusa x reader fluff#sakusa x reader#hq sakusa#hq headcanons#hq imagines#hq smut#hq#sakusa smut#haikyuu smut#haikyū!!#haikyuu fluff
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Schedules
Based on this post.
Pyrrha: *with Yang* J-Jaune.
Jaune: *looking up from notebook* Pyr?
Pyrrha: *sweating* W-W-Would you be i-interested, I mean, um, me a-and Yang, um, w-we want...we want-WE-
Yang: Hey. *holds Pyrrha's hand* Don't worry P-Money, I got this. *kisses her cheek*
Yang: Loverboy! You know how me and Pyrrha have been dating for a few weeks, right?
Jaune: Yes, and I'm very happy it's been going well for the both of you!
Yang: Thank you. And you, Pyrrha, and me have been hanging with each other more than often, so we're good friends, right?
Jaune: I mean, you do invite me to third-wheel on your dates. I think we're a bit more than "good" friends, no?
Pyrrha: *red*
Yang: You cute little flirt, you.
Jaune: What?
Yang: Me and Pyrrha where thinking. Coul-
Pyrrha: COULD YOU DATE US?!?!
Jaune: HUH?
Yang: Whoa! Way to put it all out, babe! I'm proud of you.
Jaune: *blushing* C-Could you repeat that.
Pyrrha: Yang and me both decided we wanted you to join our, uh, relationship. We both lo...l-lov...we both really like you. You're smart and kind and handsome and determined andireallywanttokissyouonthemouthand-
Yang: Yeah, what she said. You're a real catch, Loverboy. And we want to reel you in. So...what do you say?
Jaune: Wow...really? I...I would love to be a part of you relationship.
Yang: YES!
Pyrrha: *nearly faints out of sheer happiness*
Jaune: But I can't.
Yang: What.
Pyrrha: *glass break sfx*
Pyrrha: Wha-Why not?!
Jaune: I'm too busy!
Yang: ...what.
Jaune: I can't date the two of you. I don't have the time.
Yang: Is this some kind of joke, Vomit-Boy? Because if it is, you need to get better material.
Jaune: It's not a joke! See? *pulls out piece of paper*
Pyrrha: What is this?
Jaune: My schedule.
Yang: Combat class...leadership class...cook for team? Frag time? The hell is that?
Pyrrha: Oh, that must be when he plays that shooty game he plays. Team...something 2?
Yang: What the? Training with Pyrrha? BABE! You've had alone time with him and you didn't invite me?
Pyrrha: I'm sorry!
Jaune: See? I'm really sorry girls. I'd love to date you, but my schedule's packed.
Yang: *seething with rage*
Pyrrha: no...NO! I WON'T ACCEPT THIS! JAUNE ARC! YOU WILL MAKE TIME FOR US BOTH!
Yang: Yeah!
Pyrrha: YOU WILL GO ON DATES WITH US!
Yang: YEAH!
Pyrrha: YOU WILL GIVE US GIFTS!
Yang: YEAH!
Pyrrha: AND YOU WILL MAKE LOVE TO US GENTLY ON A HOT SUMMER'S NIGHT!!!
Yang: YEA-wait what?
Jaune: But...but...I don't have the time!
Yang: Jaune, just do your work later in the day.
Jaune: But my sleep.
Pyrrha: Beloved, you wake up at the crack of dawn. You'll be fine.
Yang: And if it really is such an issue, just do your work with us. We mostly have the same homework, anyways.
Jaune: I...I never even thought of that.
Pyrrha: *sighs* You're such a silly, silly man.
Yang: Hey, he's our silly, silly man.
Jaune: Yeah! I mean, we are a thing now, right?
Yang: Damn straight! Now, get on your bed.
Jaune: Huh?
Yang: You see, Loverboy, you got me and P-Money over here really stressed out with your, "schedule shenanigans," and we need to cool off.
Pyrrha: *nodding head*
Yang: When we're stressed, we usually cuddle each other. But why do that when we have this big, blonde, hunky teddy bear in front of us? You feel me?
Jaune: *blushing* Y-Yeah. I, uh, I feel you.
Yang: Oh you'll be feeling us alright.
Jaune: *very red*
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Band AU: Hazbin Hotel
Because there's always a band AU.
-666 News Broadcast Theme Plays through the dive bar cafe from the small, flickering TV in the corner-
Katie Killjoy: Breaking News in the Pop industry today! Our sunshine and rainbows, Mandy Moore wannabe, and Princess of Hell, Charlotte Morningstar, has come out with a new music video to help promote a brand new album that appears to have been conjured up seemingly overnight.
Angel: Hey, Vagina! (Elbows Vaggie) Ain't that your girl crush from the open band night down at Husk's Casino two months ago?
Vaggie: (chokes on her coffee) What?! Turn it up, Jackass!
Angel: (steals the remote from across the bartop and turns up the TV)
Tom Trench: And, boy howdy, this makeover is on par with most Disney child stars diving off the deep end!
Katie Killjoy: (spears a pen through Tom's hand) No one gives a shit Tom.
Tom Trench: MY HAND!!!
Katie Killjoy: Spectators and fans of our usually diabetically sweet princess feel that this sudden shift is caused by her breakup with Seviathan Von Eldritch just last month, ending the royal arranged engagement, after he mentioned how she refused to "put out" before marriage in an interview with Hell's High Class Weekly.
Vaggie: (bristles) The douchebag....
Katie Killjoy: Let's watch as our lovely princess makes her breakdown public.
-Screen shifts to Charlie holding a mic in one hand while picking a guitar in another, wearing 2000's Avril Lavigne glam rock attire (hot pink, baggy cargo pants, black leather studded belt, rainbow converse, black leather wrist bands, grey tank top with two black goats faced just the right way so their curved horns make a heart and tied together with a rainbow knot, and a black and red stripped tie) Razzle and Dazzle are playing drums and bass-
Charlie: Don't you know that IIIIIIIII- (flips off the camera and sticks out her tongue while mouthing "Fuck you, Seviathan" as the song reaches its climax) I don't give a daaaaaaaamn about you!!! I won't give it up, not for you!!! I'm not gonna cry about some stupid guy. A guy who thinks he's all that!
Vaggie: Whoa! (Big smiles like when Adam got stabbed) Get it, Charlie!
Katie Killjoy: (as the screen returns to normal) Other songs on the album include "Behind These Crimson Eyes", "The Dick Who Blocked His Own Shot", "Smack a Bitch", "Since U Been Gone", and the gay community's rabid favorite "Dear Vaggie"-
Angel: (sucking down his third popsicle for breakfast) What now?
Vaggie: WHAT?!?!?!?!
Katie Killjoy: -The obviously plagiarized parody of "Cool for the Summer" by Demi Lovato has unsubtle lesbian and bisexual overtones that specifically mentions Vaggie "the Steel Vagina". The lead singer and guitarist of the Power/Grunge Metal band, Fallen Angels
Angel: (wheezes as he laughs breathlessly and falls off his stool)
Vaggie: (steaming) Angel!!! ¡Eres un chupapollas, hijo de puta! Why would you tell the news that was my name?!
Angel: (ugly walrus gasps and giggles) Because it's better than I ever dreamed!!!!
Katie Killjoy: Fans of both artists are absolutely frothing at the mouth to see what Vaggie's response will be.
Tom Trench: Frothing at the mouth and other orifices, if you catch my drift. (Gets a pen slammed into his balls) GaaAhaHaaaaHaha!
Katie Killjoy: More on this story tonight at eleven.
Vaggie:
Angel: Soooooo~ Whatcha wanna doooooo~?
Vaggie: We're going to Tune Town, getting a copy of that album-
Angel: Ooooooooh-hohohoooooh~ I can visit dat nice glory hole they got there.
Vaggie: -THEN!!! We are going back to the apartment and making a response single.
Angel: Do you know what you even want to put in it?
Vaggie: (slipping on her jacket) I'll figure it out after listening to the album!
#hazbin hotel#incorrect hazbin hotel quotes#band au#pop star charlie#metal band vaggie#metal drummer angel#chaggie#seviathan von eldritch#charlie morningstar#avril lavigne 2000s fashion was peak fashion for me#I Dont Give by Avril Lavigne#vaggie#tom trench#angel dust#big brother angel#angel and vaggie are roommates and bamd members#katie killjoy#so many song references#breakup empowerment
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I learned a kind of funny thing and I need to tell you bc it's important, cmere. Lean in so the others can't hear okay?
Ok so like
I know that the reason we are the way we are is because at some point we took up some space - as people do - and someone turned to us and went "whoa, excuse you! What do you think you're doing" or something, right? And they were, like, surprised and offended that we took up space and told us to stay real small and subservient? And we were pretty young, you and me, and we didn't really grok Peopling yet and so we assumed that everyone else was going to have that expectation too?
Okay I just learned: that isn't true at all, that person was just an asshole.
Babe. BABE. This is big.
Ok do you realize ??? that most people when they're around someone - anyone, this is important, it's an unconscious reflex and happens rather automatically - and that person is like "I have an opinion and desires and also some needs and I am going to express them openly" Did you realize, because I didn't, that most people completely intuitively go "oh! There's another person here! Lemme just scootch over so they fit better :)" PEOPLE MAKE ROOM FOR YOU.
People don't ignore us, when we're silently having wants and needs and waiting our turn to be noticed, they just have similar very loud brains and have no idea because beung corporeal is Distracting™️. Not only do people just need a reminder that you're there, they're totally happy to accomodate. In a distinctly "ope! My bad, lemme just- here-" sort of way.
My spouse has a loud brain and drowns it out with Mario Kart. I've spent most of my life quietly entertaining myself in all of these instances, because at some point someone told me I was supposed to "go play" and nobody wanted to play with me so I entertained myself right? Okay. Well I recently had a sea change and decided I was gonna pop my headphones in and watch TV on my tablet when he was doing his Mario Karting. Because the boy will easily go for four hours and I just spontaneously realized that it would actually be ridiculous if he got butthurt at me for putting some quiet tv on for myself instead of watching a grown man play the same video game for hours.
You know what happened? Not only did nobody's feelings get hurt, but I have never made it more than twenty minutes into a show before he ends a match and switches the console off. And I have never asked him to do so. When I'm over there doing my own thing with my own TV show like a person instead of just scrolling on my phone trying real hard not to exist, somewhere in his unconscious he goes "there's a whole other human being on the other end of the sofa from me. I want to turn this off and engage with that person!"
Okay do you understand what I am telling you??
When you behave like a human person and treat yourself like a human person, other people also instinctively treat you like a human person and they're happy to be reminded that they get to engage with you. The person in our past that reacted differently and got mad at us for being a person, plainly and simply: they were just being an asshole to us.
The people we love want to engage with us. Almost all of them!!! And not only that?? Most other human beings feel the same way.
Huge. Big huge.
Don't take my word for it baby cakes okay, take a sec and muster up the courage (it'll be scary the first time, but the thinking about it is always scarier than doing it I swear) and then get back out there and practice being your very own human person occupying human people space, around someone who loves you, and just... watch what happens. The first time someone warmly, graciously, voluntarily accommodates you is the greatest feeling a corporeal being can experience, and you deserve it too.
#recovering people pleaser#recovering from abuse#recovering from trauma#recovering codependent#recovering from cptsd#cptsd recovery#actually cptsd#just neurodivergent things#actually neurodivergent#mental illness#things I learned in therapy#therapy works
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RL as Twice quotes or songs idk
Cassandra
"I don't wanna wanna be up no no more oh
I don't wanna wanna be up up all night again
I don't wanna I don't wanna waste my time
Oh 깊어진 이 밤이 끝날 수 있을까 oh" (Oh deepened night, will it end?)
Up no more-Eyes Wide Open
(She's the whole song)
Donna
"You make me feel special
세상이 아무리 날 주저앉혀도 (앉혀도) (No matter how the world bring me down)
아프고 아픈 말들이 날 찔러도 (Even when hurtful words stab me)
네가 있어 난 다시 웃어 (I smile again cuz you're there)
That's what you do"
Feel Special
(OK BUT SHE WOULD BE A MINA BIASED)
Bela
"And you know, you turn my whole world upside down
Catch me before I ever hit the ground
And I'd do the same for you, oh, whoa"
I Got You-With You-th
(She likes You Get Me)
Daniela
"I wanna know 사탕처럼 달콤하다는데 (How it could be as sweet as candy)
I wanna know 하늘을 나는 것 같다는데 (How it's like flying in the sky)
I wanna know, know, know, know
What is love? 사랑이 어떤 느낌인지 (What love is like)
I wanna know 하루 종일 웃고 있다는데 (How it keeps smiling all day)
I wanna know 세상이 다 아름답다는데 (How whole world turns beautiful)
I wanna know, know, know, know
What is love? 언젠간 나에게도 사랑이 올까?" (Will love come to me someday?)
What is love?
(Did I put the whole chorus?? Yes)
Angie
"You got me, I think we're in trouble, baby
Yeah, that's trouble
I like this trouble"
Trouble-Between 1&2
(I can't think in something better... And she would be a Chaeyoung Biased)
Alcina
"When they talk about me they all saying, "Oh, I love her!"
I ain't seeing no lies, look here, I'm the highlight
If you had my love, you'd love me for your whole life"
Icon-Formula of love O+T=<3
(Idk she give me Icon vibes)
Miranda
"Hey, boy
Look, I'm gonna make this simple for you
You got two choices
Yes or yes?"
Yes Or Yes
(She actually write the whole song)
(And MC is that part of Doughnut where it says "Our love loop")
#resident lover#Twice#Once#O+T=<3#cassandra dimitrescu#bela Dimitrescu#Daniela Dimitrescu#Donna Beneviento#Lady Dimitrescu#Alcina Dimitrescu#alcina dimitrescu#Mother Miranda#English is not my first language#English is not my native language
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Imagining an episode of mlp where twilight hears the word "transgender" and asks what it means and rarity gives her a rather formal fanciful explanation and twilight acts like she understands it but she's actually confused as hell. And so she runs off and begins researching it on her own while the rest of the mane six carries on with their gender shenanigans. Pinkie asks rarity if being transgender is similar to having a food allergy, and rarity is baffled and says no, and pinkie says that's very good bc her friend has a sprinkle allergy and pinkie just can't IMAGINE not being able to eat sprinkles!!! And pinkies trans so she wanted to know if she had to avoid sprinkles or not. Rainbows like "whoa hold on, you're transgender?" and pinkies like "sure am! Sure as rain! Sure as snow, and hail, and sleet, and sure as my pinkie sense! That's how I learned" and rainbows still just a bit confused but rarity sends her a glare so that she shuts up and doesn't say anything insensitive, then tells pinkie herself that she is very happy pinkie told them and they will do anything they can to make her comfortable. Fluttershy quietly tells them that she's trans, too, and pinkie gets sooooo excited that fluttershy came out to them and decides to throw a party to celebrate it. So then the A plot of the episode is pinkie and fluttershy planning the party together, with pinkie occasionally offering to invite more people than fluttershy is comfortable with and fluttershy learning to speak up for her boundaries.
And then the B plot is rainbow dash asking rarity about how gender works. "Wait, so there's no such thing as a girl? Is that what you're saying?" "No, rainbow. What I'm saying is that there is no meaningful way to distinguish a girl from a non-girl. In fact, someone can be both a girl and not a girl at once, or their gender can change over time. I myself used to identify as bigender once, as it was all the rage in canterlot after princess Luna came out, but I have since grown to realize that the label 'lesbian' fits my gender better." " Uh, you're gonna need to run all that by me one more time"
Rarity and rainbows whole talk takes place while rarity is trying to choose the perfect outfit for the party and rainbow is just following her around with questions
Then it's time for the party, and rainbow asks fluttershy "so um... You're transgender. So that means you're a boy now?" and twilight, who has only just now run out of the library after doing research, is like "oh nononono if fluttershy is a trans boy then that means she. He. They were a boy all along! Well unless their gender fluctuated, which can happen" and pinkie, who has seen fluttershy already become upset a few times that day, gasps and covers fluttershys ears, and rarity and twilight and rainbow dash begin arguing about gender. Until applejack comes in with the apple cider she brought for the party and sees everyone a bit upset and tells everyone to QUIET DOWN. She then walks around and asks fluttershy "fluttershy, how do you want us to talk about you? As a mare, right?" and fluttershy nods, so applejack asks the same thing of pinkie, who says "wellllllllllll it's a bit funner than that actually, you can call me a colt too! Double trouble" and applejacks like "well, there you go" and rainbow tries to ask a few more questions but applejacks like what's the problem it's easy enough to understand. I got it when big mac came out and I was just a filly. And twilight, finally a bit less anxious bc she thinks she understands a bit more, says that you don't need to understand everything about your friends so long as you can respect it. Applejack nods and says exactly "oh, an' while we're here, I should tell yall that I like to be called a 'he' and a 'they'", and everyone's like oh alright applejack, and rarity brings up that her gender is a lesbian, and pinkie is like "WOW this gender party just keeps getting bigger! Now we can all celebrate together" and fluttershy admits that she didn't really want a party thrown just for her, but if it's for everyone, then that sounds a lot more fun. And they all party together the end
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If It's With You Ep 4 Stray Thoughts
Last week, Amane helped Ryuji study for his exams so he could avoid extra classes, all the while nursing his crush. We learned about Ryuji's sense of duty to the restaurant coming from his devotion to his deceased father, and we had a touching moment where Amane paid respects and promised to help Ryuji at the father's shrine. Amane got to share a meal with Ryuji's family and got to bask in their warmth, something he hasn't ever been able to really experience (sorry, Grandma). We left at Amane confessing that he likes Ryuji before running off.
Man, I love Ryuji so much. He's just so serious about things. I like that he's trying to put together a timeline to understand what has happened.
I love that Amane is such a menace because you can see him already sliding behind that smile and trying to ease the tension, but Ryuji hates when Amane starts to mask.
Yes, fuck school! We have gay problems to solve!
Oh fuck yes, Ryuji, my man. He is the best boy of the year holy shit. He is confused and asked Amane what he wants from the confession so he can decide what to do next. This is actually so special because we know Amane fucks. Even if this is his first romantic attraction in a long time, this is a gay boy who has ideas about male intimacy.
Amane didn't let me down! He said let's see that dick! He also has feelings!
These boys are so brave. They are facing their feelings and each other so earnestly. I don't think I could have been this forthright as a teenager.
Now, Ryuji, please share with the audience this confession you're holding.
"I never thought of dating, or being in a relationship like lovers or something like that with you... The truth is I can't imagine it. But... I myself... think that liking you might be good. I won't act like nothing happened, and it won't be like before. Now I know you like me. So... please... make it one-sided for a while," just healed something in me holy shit.
No, but Amane is so valid for being overwhelmed with feeling. Sometimes "I see you" is better than "I love you, too."
We're going on a fireworks date in three weeks!
He broke it off with his hookups but hasn't seen or heard from Ryuji in a while. That's so hard when you're a teen.
I hate being allergic to watermelon. It looks so refreshing.
Whoa, Amane has cake.
I am so curious about the Grandma.
We didn't get stood up!! I knew Ryuji wouldn't let us down!
I'm going to be thinking about this scene at the shrine for a long time. This has been an incredible year, but Ryuji is taking us places I've only wished for in the quiet of my heart.
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The Road to Kaer Morhen - p.5
(canon typical violence below, mild)
Jaskier's breath caught in his throat and made him stumble. Unable to intervene he had to watch Aiden cast the familiar blue shock wave at the group of soldiers behind them. At once the men in front were thrown back, crashing into their fellow soldiers and creating a loud ruckus that made Jaskier's ears ring. Wind caught his hair, blinding him momentarily, as he cursed Aiden for his stupidity.
While the burst of Aard had certainly helped them to gain some distance from the soldiers, they could just have split up earlier than planned, to achieve the exact same thing. It took the soldiers hardly a minute before they were up and running again, this time yelling orders at each other about Aiden not being the White Wolf, but another witcher and therefore their new priority. Aiden who, despite him insisting on the opposite, was not yet fully recovered and still struggled with both his balance and restricted vision. Him being their primary target was a very bad, not good thing that would definitely lead to some unavoidable consequences. Jaskier cursed again, grabbed the witcher by his knotted sleeve and tucked him forcefully to the left, where the street parted into a busy crossroad. “Why on earth would you do that?!” He demanded to know, dodging a farmer's cart by a hair's length and pulling Aiden with him. The Cat could only look at him bewildered, Jaskier's worries completely flying past his head.
With a loud groan, the bard realized that Aiden, like every other damned witcher he had met before, had absolutely no sense for protecting himself. Jaskier had no idea, why he had thought otherwise in the first place. In that regard they all proved to be idiots again and again.
Finally reaching the market after what felt like forever, Jaskier zigzagged through the groups of people until he couldn't see the soldiers anymore. “Alright, we're splitting up now. You're of greater importance to them, because those prejudiced piss pots think you are stronger than me.” Aiden raised his eyebrows at that, but Jaskier didn't give him time to argue. “So don't get caught, alright? Be as inconspicuous as possible, disguise yourself if you can. I mean it, Aiden, I am not walking up that mountain on my own, because I will perish of boredom if you're not with me.”
“Whoa, there, shouldn't I be the one that worries about you?” The witcher asked, with a lopsided grin on his face. “You are a tiny, little human, after all.” Jaskier took a deep breath and let the imaginary weight fall off his shoulders. He knew he tended to be overprotective over his friends and family, but Aiden was right, he shouldn't worry too much about the other man. Cats were known for their excellent stealth. He'd probably scale the next building and hide away in the shadows of the rooftops until it was time for the two of them to meet at the other side of the city, were it adjoined the forest.
Feeling a little better about their situation, he grinned back at the witcher, “See you at sun-high.” And with one last wave, he dove into the crowds.
From then on everything felt a little bit easier. He was back in his element. Passing errand boys, dodging groups of chattering wives and stepping out of the way of heavily laden errand boys, Jaskier easily put more and more distance between him in the troop of soldiers, who's redanian armor made them stand out like donkeys among sheep. It was actually quite funny to watch them, how they stumbled around, fishing for some sort of authority the didn't have in a country that wasn't theirs. A troop of redanian soldiers against a single kaedweni innkeeper was one thing, but seeing them trying and failing to shoo away the three old women that were gossiping in front of a young lad that looked somewhat similar to Jaskier was the height of entertainment.
Despite his colorful outfit and obvious lute bag, hardly anyone spared him more than a glance. No matter what Geralt said, walking through a city with just enough confidence to look like you belonged there, but not too much to stand out, was an art form in itself. Truth be told, Jaskier might've only believed so because it took him years to perfect this skill. He was an expert in it now, though and when one of his pursuers came a bit too close to him, he calmly kept on walking, passing the man with just two other people between them. He followed the natural flow of people for a while, discreetly taking down every Wanted Notice with his name on it. Every now and then he tried to look up the rafters and roofs of houses that seemed rather climbable, without appearing too suspicious, but he never saw a hint of his Cat.
Maybe that was for the better, he willed his anxiousness to quieten. If he wasn't here, that only meant that he was already waiting somewhere in the forest. Sun-high wasn't that far away anyways.
He helped a young mother by picking up the knot doll her child had dropped and exchanged a couple of pleasant words while they walked closer towards the forest. Saying his goodbyes with a warm smile, Jaskier stepped off the main street and into a much smaller alley that lead to a few single story houses. He took his time to pet a tricolored barn cat, just as promised, before slowly but surely merging into the slim shadows. More and more aware of his bearings, he crept along the walls of houses and sheds, turning around and pretending to take a piss against a bush when a merchant rode by. Crude but effective. The only thing left that separated him from his goal was a wide dirt rode that carved around the forest.
Standing in the shade of a wooden canopy Jaskier remained still as a statue, eyes scanning through the underbrush, ears strained for any noise that didn't belong. The problem with that being, that everything inside a forest made noise and trying to figure out which once were normal sounds and which weren't usually fell into Geralt's domain. With his witcher hearing he could not only make out a rustling bush, but also listen for a heartbeat and identify it as either animal, human or monster. There was also the fact that Jaskier's sense of smell couldn't pick up anything than the stink of fox and the giant dung heap nearby.
In the end he just had to trust his instincts. And his instincts were telling him to worry.
It didn't take long for him to realize why.
It wasn't the forest that was off, it was the road. The sun was high in the sky, just starting to change from comfortably warm to hot, the market was full with all kinds of people and yet the road was empty. No wagons, no riders, not a single person to be seen. Someone was blocking off the path. Someone that held no authority over a crowd but could easily scare away any passerby. It could be a trap of course, but Jaskier had spent enough time singing in the barracks of Redania to know how they usually operated. The bard had always had a strong dislike for soldiers. Few of them were decent people these days. There was hardly anything knightly or chivalrous about them, as if they forgot what they were fighting for. Unlike them, Jaskier hadn't allowed himself to be controlled by his disdain and had followed his orders properly. Singing and performing in the barracks, listening in to every conversation that would meet his ears. He had learned a lot, almost too much, about how the soldiers really worked behind their pretenses. Cordoning off an area just big enough people on the outside wouldn't make out the noise their prisoners made when they were beat to a pulp, was certainly one of their favorites. There was an advantage though, Jaskier thought as he emerged from the canopy and walked right into the forest, nobody would be able to hear them screaming either. The only thing that kept him from smiling was the knowledge that whatever they had done to his Cat Witcher wouldn't be pretty.
And it really wasn't.
The camp, counting six tents and four horses, was built around an old tree, its trunk wide enough to withstand the hissing and spitting Cat Witcher that was chained to it. His linen shirt was torn during a fight, deep irregular gashes cut through his chest, the witcher's blood soaking into his clothes and the bandages underneath. Aiden was screaming with rage, struggling against his bindings without any sense to it, throwing his head from left to right, snapping his teeth at everyone that dared to come too close. His fangs were bloody, successful. To Jaskier's eyes it was almost alarmingly obvious that Aiden's aggression was mainly caused by pure fear and pain. The witcher's instincts had clearly taken over. He didn't even react to the bard when said one entered the camp. Five soldiers, one archer, turned towards him.
Oh I know. I know you want Jaskier to fight, but please take note, should you choose this, the next chapter will be detailed and violent. (and 100% skipable of course! I know not everyone likes to read that sort of stuff, don't worry, I got you!) The author craves blood.
Negotiating is always an option to keep this pg.
Also there's now a relationship bar in the drawing, so: Aiden/Lambert is set in stone for this fic, but Aiden/Jaskier or Aiden/Jaskier/Lambert is up to you, I will give you multiple chances for this, so don't worry.
please like and reblog if you voted✨🌿🌼✨
Told my brother about J and A hiding in the crowd of the market and he said „Erstmal ein Marktfrühstück und eine Weinschorle bestellen.“ and I was so tempted.
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#the witcher#witcher#artistsfuneral about the witcher#road to kaer morhen fic#jaskier#jaskier the bard#aiden#witcher aiden#rtkm#tw blood#cw blood#canon typical violence#tw violence#cw violence
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🚨SPOILERS FOR FANTASY HIGH JUNIOR YEAR EPISODE 7🚨
Dimension20 "Fantasy High Junior Year"
Episode 7 "Stress Tested"
Timestamp: 00:42:47
Video Length: 4min. & 20sec.
Gorgug's NAT20s in Artificer Class!!!
Brennan: "Who else is rolling?"
Zac: "I think I know that I would be doing Academics."
Brennan: "Cool. I think we're gonna burn through all four of your academic tracks all at once right now."
Zac: "Now, help me out with the math of like, does it help me to do the easiest Artificer class at the five or should I?"
Brennan: "You're gonna do all three Artificers in a row."
Zac: "Okay."
Brennan: "It's basically do you wanna do all three Artificers first and Barbarian last or do you wanna do Barbarian first and then all three Artificers?"
Zac: "I think I'll do Artificers first."
Murph: "Yeah, you probably want lower DC for Artificer, right?"
Zac: "Yeah."
Brennan: "Great. You can do Arcana, Tinker's Tools or Investigation."
Zac: "I'll do Tinker's Tools. It's much better than the others."
Brennan: "Hell yeah. Go for it."
Zac: "Okay, so first Artificer class." *rolls* "Okay, that's a 21."
Brennan: "21. As the weeks go along, you dive in. Henry is here, all the other Artificer students. You're surrounded by robots and weird mists, in encounter suits and stuff like that."
Zac: "I'm giddy."
Brennan: "The freshman stuff, you get an A+. You put a ****ing satellite in the sky. You are an accomplished Artificer. And if you think about, how many Artificer levels does Gorgug have? You have like five, right?"
Zac: "Now five. Yeah."
Brennan: "Think about the fact that you ended freshman year at level eight. You get it. So, A+ in freshman Artificing."
Lou: "All right. All right."
Zac: "Okay."
Brennan: "Let's go round two. DC jumps up by five. Same check."
Zac: "Okay. Okay." *rolls* "That is a 13."
Brennan: "Will allow you to pass sophomore Artificer with a C."
Zac: "Okay."
Murph: "You have a bardic, right?"
Zac: "Oh. Oh!"
Lou: "You also have two more levels of class you need to just pass."
Zac: "I might take a stress token."
Brennan: "Take a little stress token." *evilly smiling 😭😭✋✋*
Zac: "Do another."
Ally: "Is a C okay though?"
Siobhan: "C is okay. C's get degrees."
Zac: "Is C okay?"
Brennan: 😬🫤
Lou: "It's not a D. It could have been a D."
Siobhan: "You could re-roll and get worse."
Murph: "Yeah, that's true."
Zac: "Oh gosh. My roll is six. I'll take one stress token."
Lou: "Ooh"
Ally: *claps*
The awesome caption team: (tense bass)
Brennan: "Gorgug takes our first stress token. I'm so happy." *evilly smiling 😭*
The awesome caption team: (Zac groaning)
Ally: "We gotta get you the MCAT, Gorgug."
Brennan: "We'll resolve what the stress...like we're all gonna meet all of you when we come outta downtime to see how ****ing fried you all are. So we'll resolve what happens with those at the end. Go ahead and re-roll."
Zac: *rolls*
Emily: *sighs*
Ally: "Worse?"
Zac: "It's a Nat 1."
Brennan: "Nat 1. Okay."
Zac: "Now, so what happens if I take a second stress token?"
Brennan: "That would be the final one you can take for this roll."
Zac: "Okay, I'll do that."
Brennan: "Cool, stress. Here you go." *evilly smiling*
Lou: "So when you take a stress token, it obliterates?"
Brennan: "It obliterates the previous roll."
Lou: *gasps* "Oh boy."
Ally: "Ohhh. It's not advantage."
Zac: "Okay." *Rolls* "Nat20!"
Siobhan: *gasps*
Brennan: "Yes! OMG!"
Gorgug: "I'm getting it!"
Zac: "Oh!"
Brennan: "You unlock a ****ing... we'll have to deal with that. We'll talk at the break. But that is ****ing huge."
Ally: "Wow!"
Brennan: "A+, nat20. Also, Gorgug, you unlock an academic resource which will come into play..." *shrugs* "later this season. I'll also talk to you about that secretly."
Siobhan: "Whoa!"
Brennan: "And it's up to you whether you would tell your classmates or not."
Lou: "All right."
Brennan: "Holy 💩. Okay, two stress tokens. You got it. A+."
Ally: "Wow. Yeah, worth it, honestly."
Brennan: "Gorgug is gonna be ****ing fried at the end of this." *laughs 😭* "Now You're gonna do your Junior Year Artifice."
Zac: "Okay."
Brennan: "The DC has jumped up by 10. So just passing, a D is a 15. Right?"
Zac: "Okay."
Brennan: "And then an A would be a 27."
Zac: "And I don't get anything from the nat20 in terms of my roll, right?"
Brennan: "I'll say with a nat20, I'll give you advantage on this roll. You roll this with advantage."
Zac: "It doesn't hurt to ask, you know?"
Brennan: "It doesn't hurt to ask."
Emily: "Just gotta ask."
Brennan: "Go for it."
Zac: "All right. Hello, fellow Juniors." *rolls* "Another Nat 20."
Brennan: "Nat20?!?!?!"
Everyone going wild with cheers and claps
Brennan: "What the ****?!"
Lou: "He's an Artificer."
Siobhan: "He's the greatest wizard ever born!" (The caption team missed this amazing line Siobhan said! 😭✋)
Ally: "Gorgug! Gorgug! You're listening to 'The Beats to Study To.'"
Lou: "Yes."
Ally: "That girl with her cat. You're just like, 'Yeah.'"
Zac: "I'm so chilled."
Lou: "I pay her to come by."
Brennan: "Oh my ****ing ***."
Lou: "She sits in the window."
Emily: "Yeah!"
Zac: "School's easy."
Ally: "Dude, you're killing it! You're killing it!"
#dimension 20#dimension20#blog#fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#stress tested#fantasy high stress tested#fantasy high junior year episode 7#fhjy ep 7#fantasy high scene#fantasy high junior year scene#dimension20 scene#queue#brennan lee mulligan#gorgug#gorgug thistlespring#zac oyama
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This was supposed to be for laughs, mostly (but ended up more sinister). It's March of the OCs, but I don't really do OCs. So they only have dialogue in this, but there IS a bit of backstory implied. I do think the Tracies would have inevitably pinned themselves on the radar of some counterterrorism or intelligence division of the GDF. I also maybe watched too much "Criminal Minds", "NCIS", and "Scorpion". This takes place after "Space Race".
PERSON OF INTEREST
"Please, tell me he didn't do it!"
"I'm afraid he did. The kid's space-rated. With parental concent."
"Ó meu Deus, what was Scott THINKING!?"
"I could throw together a quick profile, but I'm fairly certain that was a rhetorical question."
"The child is TWELVE!"
"Fourteen."
"Yeah, that changes everything and makes him soooooo much more qualified to DISARM AN ORBITAL NUKE!"
"..."
"Which... he wouldn't have done without assistance and intel."
"Now we're talking!"
"That's a moot point, anyway. We can't interrogate the boy without a legal guardian present."
"Who is on approach now and due to arrive from an earthquake in Peru in... about seven minutes."
"Four, if he pushes it to Mach 19. Which he will."
"So we don't have much time to coordinate a strategy. I think you better run point on the interview."
"That's... not necessarily a good idea."
"Listen, I'm the Big, Bad, Unknown Quantity guy, who's threatening the pup."
"That's his baby brother."
"Immaterial. Scott Tracy is a pack leader. That's his pup. He's gonna snarl, growl, bare his teeth and bark till I go away and not be a danger to his kid anymore. THEN he's gonna lawyer the child up, down and backwards. Probably the ginger Spaceman too."
"And you think he's gonna be less hostile if it's ME in the interrogation room? You HAVE read my file. We didn't exactly part on amicable terms. He's not going to be more forthcoming if it's me."
"No. But the boy might. He's raised in the household with strong, charismatic female figures. He's not gonna be intimidated. If the child is not scared, Scott is more likely to calm down and comply with the line of questioning. We need to figure out how the nuclear codes were leaked, remember?"
"That's one vague tangent to build an interrogation on. Speaking of... We still need to interrogate the Ginger Tracy. He logged IR in for space junk duty."
"I'm on it. The trick is to get him down from orbit without their Intrepid Leader biting my head off. So keep him occupied, deal?"
"Good luck. That kid's a genius."
"I figured as much."
"No, you don't get it. A genius genius. Top 2% IQ".
"I'll take my chances."
"You do that. Simpson says he was responsible for the original crude code of Eos."
"Whoa! Alright. I'll do my homework, then take my chances. Are they ready to test Eos out in the open, by the way?"
"Not yet. The AI is acting out. Hey, hear that noise? Incoming Thunderbird in three... two... ONE..."
#thunderbirds are go#scott tracy#alan tracy#gdf counterterrorism division ocs#it makes more sense in my head#methinks i have astronomy#my fic
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Tickles for Tae
Lee: Taehyung
Ler: Seokjin
♫₊˚.🎧✩｡
Taehyung was desperate. Not long ago he realised that he really likes beeing tickled.
It all started when he was tickled by Jungkook because he drank the bunny's banana milk. He couldn't believe it at first but after a little research he found out that there is a whole community of people with the same pleasure.
There are also special terms for the persons involved. A Lee is a person who likes to be tickled and a Ler is someone who likes to tickle others. There are also switches who like to do both.
Taehyung is a lee but there is a problem: nobody knows about it. He would really like to tell his friends, but he is afraid that they would think the wrong thing of him or find him weird.
However, Taehyung had been in a lee mood for almost 2 weeks and still hadn't been tickled. He really didn't know what to do now…
He was so desperate and sad that he locked himself in his room straight after dance training and hasn't come out yet.
"Taehyung, please open the door," he heard the voices of his hyungs outside the door, but he remained stubborn.
Taehyung thought he could finally think about his problem in peace, but rejoiced too soon….
After a few minutes he heard a key being turned in the lock and shortly afterwards the door opened.
It was the oldest of the Members Jin.
"Taehyung please tell me what's going on. We're all worried about you," Jin said carefully.
The younger man just shook his head. He was embarrassed to talk about it, especially since he had locked himself up over such a topic.
"Taehyung, I'm going to stay here until you tell me what's going on," said Jin with a confident grin on his face.
Taehyung didn't say anything back. He knew that he would have to give up for better or worse. So he got up and locked the door once again that day.
"Well not too long ago I found out that I…really like being tickled", Tae said ashamed.
"Please don't think weird of me! It's not a fetish or anything!" he made clear when he noticed the look on Jin's face.
"Eww Taehyung that's really weird! Why can't you be normal? You're so disgusting!" said Jin.
"I know", Taehyung said and laid down on his bed, his head buried in the pillow.
That's exactly what Jin wanted. He seized the opportunity and turned Taehyung around, only to find himself over the younger one afterwards.
"What are you doing hyung?" asked Taehyung, giggling as he looked into the grinning face of the oldest.
“I was just kidding and now I’m gonna tickle the sadness out of you!” Jin said smiling.
Soon Taehyung felt his shirt being raised and Jin wiggling his finger above the youngers tummy.
“Gahahahahahaha nahahahahahahaha” Taehyung blushed and covered his face.
"Does this even count as tickling? i'm barely touching you." Jin laughed and started spidering Taehyung's tummy.
Jin coed as he dipped one finger in the younger's belly button and used the other on his waistline.
“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HYUHUHUNG NOHOHOHOHO” the tiger let out high pitched giggles as Jin started squeezing his sides.
“Whoa! i didn’t expect that much of a reaction.” Jin said.
"YEHEHESS YOU DIIID", Taehyung replied.
"As much as I'd love to keep tickling you, tickling the same spot all the time gets boring. I wonder if you're ticklish anywhere else?" asked Jin, looking at the giggling male in front of him.
“Oh, seems like someone’s got the giggles!" Jin teased.
Then Jin sat down on the boy's ankles and gently ran his finger up and down Tae's foot.
“STOHOHOHP!” Taehyung tried to squirm and to pull his legs towards him, but Jin was doing an amazing job on pinning him down with his weight.
“I didn’t think you’d be this ticklish, .” Jin wondered happily as he kept on playing with the others feet, teasing the crap out of him.
“IHIHIHIHI *squeal* NAHAHAHA STAHAHA *squeak* SHUHUHUT UHUHUP STOHOHOHOP” This was so embarrassing and he was losing his mind. And then his laughter dipped into silence for a quick second and Jin knew he’d had enough, lifting his hands and climbing off of the younger, leaving him to curl up and cackle his little heart out.
"Did you have fun tiger?", Jin asked curious.
“Yehehehes thahank you.”
“I’m glad you had fun.” Jin had his arms wide open for Tae to crawl into and so he did. They lay there, younger still occasionally giggling until they were left in a comfortable silence. Then the elder spoke up.
“You know you can always come to me and ask for these types of things. You don’t have to be embarrassed tiger.
“Now I know hyung. Thanks.”
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fall out boy lyrics that make me think of the places i grew up
this town is wasted and alone -- death valley -- when i visit, if I'm lucky i get to drive around, and the nothingness is crushing. You go to school, you graduate, if you're upper or middle class you go to college, probably the local one an hour away. You have to drive an hour to get to the good grocery store, twenty minutes to the shitty one. You marry your high school sweetheart, or someone you met in college, you settle down and have kids. You have at least one family member who works for a company you're pretty sure is still just a factory, even though they have fancier names for it now. I look out the window of my parents' house and i can barely see the neighbors' house.
you were the last good thing about this part of town -- grand theft autumn/where is your boy -- i left my best friend in the city i moved from and god i miss her so fucking much. Every time i visit it's like we were never apart. Every time i leave we both wonder if we'd have made it had i not moved away.
i can't remember the good old days -- 27 -- your parents' house is supposed to feel like being a kid, running around carefree. I have not lived with my parents for eight years but every time i visit i wake up with that same chest crushing anxiety and it does not go away. Even when i get back out east it takes me days to feel like a person again.
every pane of glass that your pebbles tap/negates the pains I went through to avoid you/and every little pat on the shoulder for attention/fails to mention I still hate you -- chicago is so two years ago -- i did not visit for almost two years, and then only did so because my grandmother was dying. Had she not been, it would have likely been so much longer. I spent those two years hating that small town, because i thought if i hated it i wouldn't miss it, and it all hurt so much that it wasn't hard to try to hate it. (that didn't work, because even though it hurt, it was still home)
I know I should be home/all the colors of the street signs, they remind me of the/pickup truck out in front of your neighbor's house -- chicago is so two years ago -- it's the little things that get me, the parts that weren't so bad, the parts that were even good, the parts that killed me to leave behind. The first dance class i took out east i sobbed the entire two mile walk home.
whoa, can't do it by myself -- reinventing the wheel to run myself over -- this one gets me because every time everything just feels like too much, it's amplified by the fact that i did this to myself, i chose to move away from everyone and everything i ever knew, and it's therefore my responsibility to indeed, do it by myself
we're the kids who feel like dead ends//and the poets are just kids who didn't make it -- i've got a dark alley and a bad idea that says you should shut your mouth (summer song) -- literally all of my friends from home don't quite fit the midwestern mold, and we're all mentally ill creative types. We're in our mid twenties now and have felt like burn outs for years
I swear I'd burn this city down to show you the light -- sophomore slump or comeback of the year -- the same best friend from earlier. I worry the small town is crushing her and she's so, so bright.
the best way to make it through with hearts and wrists intact is to realize two out of three ain't bad -- i'm like a lawyer with the way i'm always trying to get you off (me & you) -- you make sacrifices to survive. Mental, emotional, physical, everyone's sacrificing something just to make it through.
it's all a game of this or that, now versus then/better off against worse for wear/and you're someone who knows someone who knows someone/I once knew, and I just want to be a part of this -- hum hallelujah -- the duality of living in such a small town where everyone knows everyone and still feeling like you have no place to belong
literally all of g.i.n.a.s.f.s. but especially: everybody wants to drive on through the night if it's a drive back home//things aren't the same anymore, some nights, they get so bad//i sleep with your old shirts and walk through this house//it's a strange way of saying that I know I'm supposed to love you, I'm supposed to love you//I've already given up on myself twice third time is the charm//threw caution to the wind, but I've got a lousy arm -- ioh was my first fob cd, and i listened to it on repeat the summer i spent commuting from my parents house to the hospital in the city to camp until i finally got an apartment. This was also the year i spent coming out to myself, terrified of the future and expectations i knew I'd never meet. I was also in love with one of my best friends and god it hurts so much for your first love to feel so wrong
I will never end up like him/behind my back, I already am -- headfirst slide into cooperstown on a bad bet -- when i first moved to the east coast i swore I'd assimilate and no one would know where i came from, but the second I'd open my mouth it would be "oh what part of the midwest are you from?" Over time I've learned to make peace with the parts of myself that are so unavoidably rural and midwestern, but there were parts i resented for a long time, because it felt like I'd never be free from where i grew up
I don't know where I'm going/but I don't think I'm coming home -- alone together -- i remember driving home from a college course i was taking my senior year of high school and just, dreaming of driving on, starting somewhere new
and in the end/i'll do it all again -- the kids aren't alright -- if things had been different, if i'd grown up differently, i wouldn't be who i am today. Also i almost got these lyrics tattooed on my thigh. Still might tbh
you were the sunshine of my lifetime/what would you trade the pain for?//and I just about snapped, don't look back//what would you trade the pain for? I'm not sure -- love from the other side -- leaving was, and is, so goddamn hard. Every time i visit my best friend, my grandparents, i have to remind myself why i left, and why i can't go back, and so much of that focuses on looking forward because if i look at the past too much i begin to romanticize the pain
scar crossed lovers, forever -- heaven, iowa -- i am so inexplicably, irreversibly bound to the people i grew up with like some sort of fucked up trauma bonding. Out here on the east coast, in the cities, it's just different. Even people who grew up east coast "rural," it's not the same. It's strong with friends from the city i moved from and even stronger with my friend who grew up in the same county.
#fob#fall out boy#moving#so much for stardust#take this to your grave#actually a lot of take this to your grave#infinity on high#folie a deux#american beauty american psycho#save rock and roll#from under the cork tree#song lyrics#this got long#midwest#east coast#transplant#long distance friendship#long distance
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Can we stop to talk about the conversation with Atton where he rambles about women and the idea of love? Because good lord can this man project like a movie theater. We're talking fractal projection. Give him a frickin' medal, because it's projection all the way down.
It's a very missable bit of dialogue. You can only get it with a male Exile, and only then if you've cheesed off Brianna by causing her influence to dip 30 points below Visas's. Unfortunately, this also causes Brianna to permanently stop talking to you, so this is something you're only ever gonna see by accident. I only learned that could even happen pretty recently, and that's with maybe 6 male Exile playthroughs under my belt. I guess I'm just very thorough about exhausting everyone's dialogue options all the time.
So. Brianna's permanently cut herself off as a companion, courtesy of Kreia whispering in her ear, and that sucks. But at least your trashman pilot has something to say about it... and whoa boy is it a consolation prize. Atton proceeds to launch into an arm-around-your-shoulders buddy talk that has exactly nothing to do with your problems and everything to do with his personal issues.
Exile: The Handmaiden lost her temper with me.
Atton: Oh, there's a surprise. Trust me, she's a handful - all warriors are. They're not used to dealing with things they can't punch, kick, or break. Look, I know how it is. Me, there's no denying that I'm a good-looking guy. You have it worse, because even though you might not be as good-looking as me, you have that whole tortured past, that command presence. Women want to save you. They think they can help you.
Exile: What are we talking about?
Atton: They think that everyone can be redeemed, and that they're the only ones who can do it. And you don't know if it's you, or the idea of you that they love.
Exile: [Awareness] Are we talking about me or you?
Atton: We're just talking. Like I said, I've never understood women. It's possible they don't love you at all. That they just want to help you... help you hear yourself if you've gone deaf to your own voice. We all lose our way sometimes, and we need someone to pull us back.
Exile: [Awareness] Sounds like you've had that experience before.
Atton: Don't remember. Truth is, I still don't listen to my conscience even when it's shouting. I think there's times I'd rather be completely deaf than hear it. But all this talk doesn't matter. I'm not qualified to give advice. Besides, when I open my mouth, I'm usually lying anyway.
Like. Just. Holy shit, Atton. Yeah, he's clearly talking about the Jedi who tried to save him, but there's so much more to unpack in here. Let's break it down.
“Women want to save you. They think they can help you.” - Atton wants to save you. He wants to be the hero to your story, something he projects at Mical (to the latter's confusion), but which can also be read into a lot of his actions – when he starts taunting the assassin on Telos to draw heat off you, when he runs out on Nar Shaddaa to give you medpacs and do the same thing with the bounty hunters. The hard evidence is on Malachor. If Atton dies, he says it outright: “Did I save you yet?” And if he falls to the Dark Side, he tells Mical that “he wanted to protect [the Exile], to help her” before he lost his chance.
“They think that everyone can be redeemed, and that they're the only ones who can do it.” - Yeah, it's not really about helping the Exile. Atton needs to be the one that 'saves' you, as a balm to his own lack of purpose and self-worth, and he gets real pissy if anyone else does a better job helping you – or god forbid gets close to you. He's constantly insecure, he's unhappy with most new party members when they join up and, and seriously, the only crime Mical ever committed was being a genuinely good dude in a crew full of misfits. Too bad the galaxy's greasiest pilot reads that as a threat.
“And you don't know if it's you, or the idea of you that they love.” - Atton's attraction to you in a nutshell, and that's before you get the question of Force Bonds involved. Like, seriously. Does he genuinely love you as a person, or is he in love with you as an ideal – as someone who could stop running and face the music for their unforgivable crimes, as someone who actually tries to fix the damage they did? As someone who can still find it in them to care about people after the war broke them down? As a Jedi that actually lives up to the ideal both the Council and Revan failed to? As someone he believes he can relate to, because he thinks he knows your reasons for what you did? Are you a stand-in for his dead Jedi and his hundred conflicting feelings over her? Is he just in love with the idea of having a purpose and wants someone he can bury himself in? Is the idea of martyring himself and finally dying for a reason what he's really obsessed with? Pick your flavor, because who knows! He certainly doesn't!
“It's possible they don't love you at all.” - While this has a lot to do with him wondering why the hell anyone would have tried to save him, I also think this is him reflecting on his own confused feelings towards the Exile. They might not be romantic with an M!Exile (or if they are, he's having intense bi denial), but they're absolutely there and he does not know what to make of them.
“That they just want to help you... help you hear yourself if you've gone deaf to your own voice. We all lose our way sometimes, and we need someone to pull us back.” - This has nothing to do with the Exile, the Handmaiden, or anyone who isn't an ex-Sith assassin who had empathy forcibly shoved into their brain after years of progressively more fucked-up descent into all-consuming hatred.
“Truth is, I still don't listen to my conscience even when it's shouting.” - He almost gets away with this one, but Atton's deep in denial here. He doesn't want to hear it, but he can't turn it off, the same way he can't stop feeling things when he used to have total control of his emotions (because he barely felt anything at all.) It's all why he can't go back to who he was, even though he badly misses the certainty he used to feel. Atton is a pro at ignoring his conscience, which definitely has nothing to do with how much he hates himself, total coincidence... but as soon as the Exile gets involved, that goes out the window, because Atton's self-preservation glitches out. Their Force wound tugs on his better nature... or it yanks at his opposite. And if that happens, Atton is very aware of what's happening to him. He succumbs, but he has more to say on the Exile's fall than anyone short of Kreia. And light or dark, his (im)moral compass gets jarred from 'cover my own ass' to 'protect the Exile' and he repeatedly sticks his neck out for no gain, so yeah, I call bullshit here. He's smack in the middle of his biggest crisis of conscience since the Sith.
“Besides, when I open my mouth, I'm usually lying anyway.” Well, at least he admits it.
#kotor ii#kotor 2#atton rand#disaster man extraordinaire#slaps ribbed jacket#this bad boy can fit so much projection in it#you can also get atton to say she woke him up inside and i cannot possibly react to this in any other way than yelling evanescence lyrics#happy may the 4th!#have some highly specific analysis on a 19-year-old game
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𝑱𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒂 𝑭𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 : 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝑵𝒊𝒏𝒆
☽︎𝑾𝒐𝒍𝒇'𝒔 𝑩𝒂𝒏𝒆☾︎
Ch.08 - Ch.10
Series Masterlist
Pairing: Stiles Stilinski x fem!Reader
Word count: 4.4k
Kate Argent chases Derek's car down the roads thinking she's chasing Derek, but when she gets word that he's on foot at the iron works she wonders who's actually driving his car. The answer: Y/n is the one behind the wheel, Stiles beside her and Scott in the back. Stiles glances out the back window while she focuses in front of them. "Faster?" She asks.
"Much faster." He answers. She grits her teeth and shifts gears, accelerating even more. After a bit Stiles looks back again to see the car still on their tail. "Y/n, I don't think you're grasping the concept of the car chase here."
"Sure I do. We're in a car, we're being chased."
"If she goes faster, she'll kill us." Scott says.
"Well, if she doesn't go faster, they're gonna kill us."
"I need to keep her on our tail. If I go too fast we could actually lose her." Y/n speeds up just a bit to make him feel better.
Tires screech and Stiles looks back yet again. "They're gone." Y/n looks in the rearview while Scott turns around. Stiles presses a button on the handheld radio and it beeps before coming to life.
"All units, suspect is on foot heading into the iron works." The Sheriff's voice informs.
Y/n huffs as she speeds up yet again to pick up Derek. She skids to a stop as they near him and Stiles opens the door. "Get in." He urges as he climbs in the back with Scott while Derek hops in the front, bullets from Mr. Argent following. The tires squeal as Y/n peels out of there.
"What part of laying low don't you understand?" Scott chastises.
"Damn it, I had him!" Derek complains.
"Who, the Alpha?" Stiles wonders.
"Yes! He was right in front of me, and the friggin' police showed up."
"Whoa, hey, they're just doing their jobs." Derek glares at Stiles. "Uh, yeah..."
"Yeah, thanks to someone who decided to make me the most wanted fugitive in the entire state." He looks pointedly at Scott.
"Can we seriously get past that? I made a dumbass mistake. I get it."
"All right, enough!" Y/n yells to get them to stop.
"How did you find him?" Stiles asks. Derek looks at them, refusing to answer.
"Can you try to trust us for at least a millisecond?" Y/n gives Derek a meaningful glance that the boys in the back miss.
"Yeah, all of us." Stiles leans forward, but backs up again at Derek's look. "Or just them. I'll be back here." He settles back and Y/n manages a twitch of a smile at him.
"And stop with the glares, please. I swear your face is gonna stick like that forever if it already hasn't."
Derek ignores her comment. "Look, the last time I talked to my sister, she was close to figuring something out. She found two things. The first was a guy named Harris."
"Our Chemistry teacher?" Stiles pipes up again.
"Of course." Y/n grumbles.
"Why him?" Scott wonders.
"I don't know yet." Derek answers.
"What's the second?"
"Some kind of symbol." He pulls a piece of paper from his pocket and unfolds it to show a drawn picture. Y/n sighs when she sees it and Scott doesn't react any better. "What? You know what this is?"
"Seen it on a necklace." She answered.
"Allison's necklace." Scott clarifies.
...
"This is gonna be impossible, you know." Scott says as the teens walk into school.
"Y/n, can't you ask her if you can borrow it?" Stiles suggests.
"It's a family heirloom, you can't just borrow something like that." She shakes her head lightly. "Why don't you just "borrow" it?" She made finger quotes around borrow. At Scott's questioning look she elaborates. "Steal it."
"I can't do that!" He quietly exclaims.
"Why don't you just ask her to borrow it?" Stiles asks Scott.
"How?" The boy questions.
"It's easy. You just say, 'hey, Allison, can I borrow your necklace to see if there's anything on it or in it that can lead me to an Alpha werewolf that I need to kill in order to get back together with you?"
"You're not helping."
"Why don't you just talk to her."
"She won't talk to me. What if she, like, only takes it off in the shower or something?"
"That's why you ease-" He stops them walking. "That's why you ease back into it, okay? Get back on the good side, remind her of the good times. And then you ask for the necklace." Stiles notices Scott has a slight smirk as he looks at nothing. "You're thinking about her in the shower, aren't you?"
"Yeah." Scott admits.
"Boys." Y/n mutters with an eye roll.
"All right, stay focused, okay? Get the necklace, get the Alpha, get cured, get Allison. In that order. Got it?"
Scott nods. "Get the necklace." They go their separate ways.
When they meet again later Scott tells them that Jackson figured out what he is. Oh, bother. Y/n sighs internally. "How the hell did he find out?" Y/n asks.
"I have no idea."
"Did he say it out loud?" Stiles asks. "The word?"
"What word?"
"Werewolf. Did he say, 'I know you're a werewolf'?"
"No, but he implied it pretty freaking clearly."
"Okay, maybe it's not as bad as it seems. I mean, he doesn't have any proof, right? And if he wanted to tell someone, who's gonna believe him anyway?"
"How about Allison's father?"
"It's kinda bad." Y/n grimaced a bit.
"I need a cure. Right now."
"I don't think it's that easy." Y/n hated to say it but she wasn't even sure there was a cure. There's rumors but as far as she knew, once you're bitten, that's it. You either change or die.
"Does he know about Allison's father?" Stiles asks.
"I don't know."
"Okay, where's Derek?"
"Hiding, like we told him to. Why?"
"I have another idea. It's gonna take a little time and finesse, though."
"We have that game tonight. It's quarterfinals. And it's your first game."
"I know, I know. Look, do you have a plan for Allison yet?"
"She's in our next class." He tilts his head towards Y/n.
"Get the necklace." Stiles walks away leaving the two to go to their class. Scott pauses when he sees Allison and Y/n takes the seat to her left, the seat on her right is open. Scott goes to sit there, but Lydia puts her stuff on the desk.
"Try another row, sweetheart." She smiles at him and he's forced to take the seat behind Lydia.
"Okay, class, let's settle down." The teacher says. "Let's get our books out."
Scott leans forward a bit towards Allison. "Allison." He whispers.
She glances at him. "Hey. Class is beginning." She whispers back.
"I know. I'll shut up. I just, um- I have some stuff on my phone that I wanted to send you. I thought you might like it."
She nods a little. "Okay." And he does so, watching her reaction as she looks at the photos he sent. Y/n glanced over at her and saw the pictures of them together. Wrong move, Y/n winced. That is not something you want to send the girl who broke up with you when she's still trying to figure stuff out.
The teacher turned back to the class then. "All right, I'd like to return to our discussion from yesterday with a more in-depth analysis of Iago and the way in which he preyed upon Othello's jealousies." Allison gathered her things and left the class with a hurt look towards Scott who jumped up to follow her out. "We seem to have some here today." Y/n sighs with a small shake of her head.
She sits across from Scott at lunch when Stiles sits next to him, his tray clattering on the table. "Did you get her to give you the necklace?" He asked Scott.
"Not exactly."
"Ah. What happened?"
"She told me not to talk to her. At all."
"So she's not giving you-"
"She's not giving me the necklace!"
"Well, did you find anything else out?"
"Just that I know nothing about girls, and that they're totally psychotic."
"Hey." Y/n piped up. "I take offense to that, mister. Not all girls are psychotic. Some are just a bit nuts. Me? I'm psychotic." She takes a bite of food and smirks with a wink.
"Okay, I came up with a plan 'B' just in case anything like this happened." Stiles says.
"What's plan 'B'?" Scott wonders.
"Just steal the stupid thing."
"You mean your plan 'B' was to use my idea as yours." Y/n raised a brow at Stiles.
"More like kept safe in back pocket."
"Uh-huh, sure." She said unbelieving, but still smiled.
"Couldn't we try at least getting to Harris?" Scott asks.
Stiles shook his head. "My dad put him on a 24-hour protective detail, okay? The necklace is all we got. Steal it. Thank you."
Scott suddenly perks up at something over her shoulder and looks at his friends. "Guys, he's watching us." The two look over and see that 'he' is Jackson and he is indeed watching them, mainly watching Scott though.
"Ignore him." Y/n says dismissively. She vaguely hears the crunch of an apple and Scott flinches.
"Scott..." Jackson's low tone comes over the chatter of other students. Y/n would normally ignore it but it's hard to when Scott starts to be bothered and she can't help but listen to it. "You can hear me? You can, can't you?"
"What's wrong?" Stiles asks.
"Jackson's talking to me. He knows I can hear him." Stiles glances over at him, but Scott stops him. "Look at me. Just talk to me. Act normal. Pretend nothing's happening."
"Are you trying to pretend not to hear me?"
"Say something. Talk to me!" Scott urges. Stiles flails his hands while Y/n frowns.
"I can't think of anything. My mind's a complete blank." Stiles says.
"Your mind's blank? You can't think of something to say?"
"Not under this kind of pressure."
"Y/n?" Scott gives her a pleading look and all she can do is give him a helpless shrug. It's like when someone asks you what your favorite book is and all of a sudden you've never read a single thing in your entire life.
Stiles looks back at the table. "FYI, he's not even sitting with them anymore."
Scott looks around but can't find the blonde. "Where the hell is he?"
"Looking for me, McCall? I'm right here." He chuckles. "So what else can you do? Huh? Can you see better? Are you stronger, more powerful? No, I knew there was no way you suddenly got that good at lacrosse. Which means you're actually a cheater, aren't you? I mean, can you even play lacrosse?"
"Yes." Scott unintentionally answers.
"I'll bet my new Co-Captain's gonna score a bunch of shots tonight, aren't you? And while you're pretending you're not a lying cheat, I'm gonna ruin your life if you don't give me what I want. And you know what I'm gonna start with? Her. I'm gonna destroy any chance you'll ever have with her." Scott grips his water bottle and his hand lightly trembles from the effort of not crushing it as he takes a sip. "And when I'm done with that, I'm gonna get her all alone, and I'm gonna get my hands all over that tight little body."
Y/n had to slightly grit her teeth to keep from physically gagging at that remark. She has to keep her expression in unaware concern for her friend, but pretending like you can't hear more than others comes easy when you've done it your entire life. "Scott, you can't let him get to you." She tries to help.
"You can't let him do this. You can't let him have this kind of power over you, okay?" Stiles tries too, but it doesn't seem to be working.
"I'm gonna do everything you never got the chance to do," Scott grips the edges of his tray and that starts to shake, "and, Scott, she's gonna beg for more. I'll bet she likes to get loud. Maybe she's even a screamer. How are you gonna feel, Scott... When she's screaming my name?" The tray snaps in half in Scott's hands, the loud sound making everyone become quiet and look at him. Scott glares when he finally finds Jackson as he takes another obnoxious bite of his apple.
...
Stiles swings his bag off of his shoulders and sets it down, going straight to his desk. Y/n follows, only pausing when she sees Derek behind the door. She raises a brow at him in question. "How did you-" She starts to ask, but Noah's voice cuts her off.
"Hey, Stiles!"
"Yo, D- Derek." Stiles turns around and finally spots him, calling his name in shock. Derek puts a finger to his lips and gestures for Stiles to get rid of his dad. Stiles scrambles for the door and tries to act natural as he shuts the door and stands in front of it.
"What'd you say?"
"What? I said 'yo... D-Dad'."
"Uh, listen, I've got something I've got to take care of, but I'm gonna be there tonight. I mean, your first game."
"My first game. Gosh, great. Awesome. Uh... Good."
"I'm very happy for you. And I'm really proud of you."
"Oh, thanks. Me too. I'm happy and proud... Of myself."
Derek looks at Y/n, his expression saying, "You really like this idiot?" She just shrugs with an amused smile.
"So they're really gonna let you play, right?"
"Yeah, dad. I'm first line. Believe that?"
"I'm very proud."
"Oh, me too. Again, I'm- oh." Noah goes to give Stiles a hug. "Huggie... Huggie, huggie..." Stiles awkwardly tries to keep his dad from suspecting anyone is in his room.
"See you there."
"Take it easy."
"Oh, and, uh, say hi to Y/n for me." Noah gives him a knowing smirk as Stiles sputters at his retreating form.
"Uh, y-yeah. Sure." He sighs once his dad is out of sight and goes back into his room, closing the door and instantly being pinned to it by Derek.
Y/n pushes Derek away and glares at him. "What did I say about touching him? Don't."
"If you say one word-" He points at Stiles over her shoulder.
"Oh, what, you mean, like, 'hey dad, Derek Hale's in my room with Y/n... Bring your gun'?" Derek doesn't say anything. "Yeah, that's right. If I'm harboring your fugitive ass, it's my house, my rules, buddy." Derek nods after a second and Stiles gives a faint laugh. He walks around Y/n, but jumps when Derek feigns a lunge. "Oh, my God!" Y/n glares at Derek as Stiles plops down in his desk chair.
"Scott didn't get the necklace?"
"No. He's still working on it. But there's something else we can try." Derek makes a gesture for him to continue. "The night we were trapped at the school, Scott sent a text to Allison asking her to meet him there."
"So?"
"So it wasn't Scott." Y/n informed.
"Well, can you find out who sent it?"
Stiles shook his head. "No, not us. But I think I know somebody who can."
"You want me to do what?" Turns out the 'somebody' Stiles knew was Danny who now stands next to Stiles as he sits at his desk.
"Trace a text."
"I came here to do lab work. That's what lab partners do."
"And we will, once you trace the text."
"And what makes you think I know how?"
"I-I looked up your arrest report, so..."
"I-I was 13. They dropped the charges."
"Whatever."
"No, we're doing lab work." Danny grabs a spare chair and sits next to Stiles at the desk intent on doing lab work. He glances behind them to look at Y/n, who's perched on the edge of Stiles' bed, and Derek, who's sat in a chair against the wall across from them. "Why is Y/n here?"
"I just came to admire Stiles." She got up from the bed and instead leaned her hip against Stiles' desk to look down at him, smiling when Stiles blinked at her.
"Okay." Danny nodded before he glanced at Derek again. "Who's he again?"
"Uh..." It took Stiles a moment for his brain to catch up from Y/n's comment and presence, but when it did he said the first thing he could think of. "My cousin... Miguel." Y/n raised a brow at him in amusement as Derek just glared up from the book he was looking at.
"Is that blood on his shirt?"
Stiles looked at the spot. "Yeah. Yes. Well, he gets these horrible nosebleeds. Hey, Miguel. I thought I told you you could borrow one of my shirts." He urges Derek with his eyes and the man shuts the book with a 'snap', tossing it onto the bed. He got up and took off his shirt, revealing his triskele tattoo between his shoulder blades, and started to rummage through the dresser. Y/n tilted her head and narrowed her eyes a bit at the tattoo, the image familiar yet she's unable to place it at the moment.
"So anyway, I mean, we both know you have the skills to trace that text, so we should probably-"
"Uh, Stiles?" Derek calls.
"Yes?"
"This..." He tugs the shirt between his hands. "No fit."
"Then try something else on. Sorry." He said to Danny only to see him staring at 'Miguel'. Danny averts his eyes when he notices he's been caught. Stiles and Y/n share a look. "Hey, that one looks pretty good, huh?" Derek had put on a blue and orange striped shirt. "What do you think, Danny?"
"Huh?" He tries to keep his eyes away from the man.
"The shirt."
"It's... It's not really his color."
Derek takes the shirt off and looks for another. Y/n lowered her voice. "You swing for a different team, but you still play ball, don't you, Danny boy?" Y/n smiled at him.
"You're horrible people."
Stiles sighs. "I know. It keeps me awake at night."
"I sleep like a baby." She smirks.
"Anyway, about that text."
"Stiles!" Derek calls again. "None of these fit."
Stiles looks from the shirtless Derek to Danny. "I'll need the ISP, the phone number, and the exact time of the text." Danny relents and works on Stiles computer. Y/n and Stiles share a discreet high five while the other two aren't looking at them.
After a while the four gather around the desk, Derek now with a shirt, as Danny types. He sighs once he finishes. "There. The text was sent from a computer. This one."
"Registered to that account name?" Derek asks. Danny nods.
"No, no, no, no. That can't be right." Stiles denies.
"There's no way." Y/n agrees. They're so in denial because the name that comes up is Melissa McCall.
...
Y/n, Stiles and Derek sit in the Jeep in front of the hospital, trying to figure out how they're going to find out who actually sent the message. Y/n shivers a bit. She hadn't gotten the chance to get a warmer jacket for the night so she was very cold. "My hands are freezing." She idly complained.
"Sorry." Stiles apologized. "Uh, I can turn the heat on." He reached to turn the car back on.
"No, it's okay." She stopped him by grabbing his hand, but when she felt how warm it was she held on with both of hers. He gave her a questioning look and she lightly shrugged. "Your hands are warm." She smiled at his flustered state from the contact and they just looked at each other for a moment.
"Can you guys save your cutesy heart eyed moments for later?" Derek grumbled from the backseat and Y/n shot him an annoyed look.
"We didn't- we weren't-" Stiles sputtered. "That- that wasn't a moment."
"It wasn't?" Y/n asked him seemingly hurt, but honestly she just wanted to tease him.
"I mean, was it? Did you want it to be?"
"I wouldn't be opposed to it." Her lips quirked up in a half smile and he couldn't help the slightly hopeful one come to him.
"Oh, my God. Your chemo signals are crazy." Derek groaned in annoyance.
"Stop sniffing our chemo signals then, Derek." She snapped.
"I can't. They're giving me a headache."
"Oh, you must be picking up on the migraine I get every time you talk. So sorry." She gave him a sad smile yet her tone was dripping with sarcasm. No more can be said between the two as Stiles' phone goes off, a picture from Scott and a call a minute later.
"Did you get the picture?"
"Yeah, we did, and it looks just like the drawing." Stiles answered.
Derek grabs Stiles' wrist to use the phone, making the boy have to bend at an awkward angle to stop it from hurting. "Hey, is there something on the back of it? There's gotta be something. An inscription, an opening, something."
"No, no, the thing's flat. And, no, it doesn't open. There's nothing in it, on it, around it, nothing. And where are you? You're supposed to be here. You're first line."
"Where the hell is Bilinski? Huh?" They hear Coach ask Scott.
"'Bilinski'?" Y/n mutters in question.
"Don't ask." Stiles slightly shakes his head.
"Man, you're not gonna play if you're not here to start."
"I know. Look, if you see my dad, can you tell him- tell him I'll be there, I'll just be a little late, okay? All right, thanks." Stiles hangs up.
"You're not gonna be able to make it." Y/n said with a small frown.
"I know."
"And you didn't tell him about his mom, either." Derek noted.
"Not till we find out the truth."
"By the way, one more thing."
"Yeah." Stiles turned his head to look at Derek just as the man pushed his head down to hit the steering wheel.
"Derek! I swear if you don't stop-" Y/n's threat is cut off by Stiles' exclamation of pain.
"Oh, God! What the hell was-"
"You know what that was for." He pointed at Stiles. "Go. Gooo!" Stiles gets out and heads towards the hospital doors. Then Derek faced Y/n as she watched Stiles walk away.
"Touch me and I break your face." She warned.
After a while of searching Stiles can't find Melissa or anyone else for that matter so he calls Y/n and she puts him on speaker. "Yeah, I said I can't find her."
"Look, ask for Jennifer. She's been looking after my uncle." Derek instructed.
Stiles does as told, but doesn't find anyone in the room either. "Yeah, well, he's not here either."
"What?"
"He's not here. He's gone, Derek."
Derek is confused for a moment before his eyes widen in realization. "Stiles, get out of there right now- it's him! He's the Alpha! Get out!"
"Stiles!" Y/n calls in alarm and bolts for the hospital, Derek hot on her heels.
Stiles backs away from the room and looks to his side to see Peter Hale up and about, old burn scars on the right side of his face. "You must be Stiles." He says.
Stiles backs up and turns to run, but stops when he sees Jennifer standing in his way. "What are you doing here? Visiting hours are over."
"You..." He points at her before looking at Peter. "And him." He points at Peter now. "You're- you're the one who-" He looks at her as he pieces things together. "Oh, my- and he's the-" He looks at Peter again. "Oh, my God, I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die." He keeps looking between the two, helpless.
Suddenly Y/n comes up behind Jennifer, grabbing the back of her head and ramming her face into the wall, knocking the woman out cold. "That's not nice, little witch." Peter tuts.
"Like I give a shit right now." She sasses.
"She's my nurse."
"She's a psychotic bitch helping you kill people." Derek stands next to Y/n. "Get out of the way." He ordered Stiles.
"Oh, damn." He dropped down to the ground and Y/n tried to help coax him to her.
"You think I killed Laura on purpose? One of my own family?" Peter advances and Derek growls, eyes flashing and canines extending. Derek jumps and pushes off the desk to vault himself at Peter, but the older Hale simply grabs him and shoves him against the wall. He then throws Derek into another before he falls to the ground. Stiles flails as he tries to avoid them. Y/n grabs him by the scruff of his jacket to pull him in a safer direction. Peter picks Derek up by the throat, the Beta holding onto his wrist to get him to let go. "My mind, my personality were literally burned out of me." He starts to drag Derek down the hall. "I was driven by pure instinct." He lets Derek drop and he grunts when he hits the ground. Peter crouches and fishes in Jennifer's pocket for her keys.
"You want forgiveness?" Derek gets up and punches Peter. He goes to hit him again yet Peter blocks, grabs his jacket, and headbutts him.
"I want understanding." He kicks Derek in the chest and he flies back. "Do you have any idea... What it was like for me during those years?" Derek spits blood on the ground as he starts to get back up. "Slowly healing, cell by cell. Even more slowly coming back to consciousness." Stiles scrambles around a desk and stops when he sees Derek on the ground. Y/n pulls him back by the collar to keep out of sight. "Yes, becoming an Alpha, taking that from Laura pushed me over a plateau in the healing process. I can't help that." Derek gets up and swipes at him, Peter dodging his fists before catching one in his own, squeezing until Derek's down on a knee. "I tried to tell you what was happening. I tried to warn you." He hauls Derek up and throws him into the protective glass over the nurse's station and over the desk. Derek crawls away and Peter follows.
"Come on." Y/n urged quietly. "This way. Go, go, go." Y/n grabbed Stiles' hand and they ran from the hospital. The feel of the Alpha's anger still lingers on her, raising the hairs on the back of her neck and fueling her legs to go faster.
Ch.10
#taeswolfie#Just a Feeling#JaF#stiles stilinski#stiles stilinski x reader#stiles stilinski x fem!reader#stiles stilinski x y/n#stiles stilinski x you#stiles stilinski fanfiction#stiles stilinski fanfic#fanfiction#fanfic#teen wolf#teen wolf fanfic#teen wolf fanfiction#x reader#x fem!reader#x female reader#x y/n#x female y/n#x you
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