#I have downloaded bumble bff | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

emcumbent · 10 months

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I would like to formally apologize to every millennial I’ve made fun of internally when they said it was impossible to make friends after college. Well.

They weren’t lying

#I have downloaded bumble bff #down bad #emposts

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coldvampire · 2 years

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god im so envious of people who have their small irl group of friends that they can hang out with on a regular basis :/

#feeling Emotions in this chilis tonight #really tho lmao i was not included in my first 'group' in the slightest and i didnt understand social cues well enough to realize this #until literal years later :/#college was a blur but even tho there were bad situations i think having people who liked to be around me even if it was only 2 was so??#it felt good yk?? and i. miss that idk.#once again im far from campus so i doubt ill be very remembered by anyone in class #im this close to downloading bumble bff again lmao i dont know how to make friends as an adult #at least if i dont meet anyone im sure it would be at least kind of interesting maybe???#i want local people :( i love yall through the computer screen but fdgfhgh #face to face... interaction.....#also im feeling this extra hard i think bc this last month ive felt extremely forgotten by everyone p much so.#yeah.

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xoxomireya · 3 months

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！ᶻz﹒the ultimate friendship guide﹒🦢﹕⤾

tysm for requesting @jasminejournal < 3 ! i had a lot of fun making this.

I. YOU CAN’T NATURALLY MATCH WITH EVERYONE

First things first: You can’t be friends with everyone. apart from the obvious “a friend to all is a friend to none”, it’s quite unrealistic to expect everyone to like you, and that’s okay! You just have to acknowledge that you aren’t meant to be liked by everyone.

Find people who are like-minded, who give you the same energy back, who have the same values, people that have healed and don’t bring their baggage and toxicity into the friendship. quality >>> quantity. Not everyone is meant for you and that’s okay, because we are not seeking quantity, we are looking for quality friends who have all the values i listed before and the ones you also find important.

The world is your oyster. in this era it’s easier than ever to make friends: meet a lot of people, say yes to plans, go to events, network, etc. The more people you meet the more you will realize that you can’t match naturally with everyone, some people are just not your vibe and the more people you meet the more likely you are to find someone you do mesh well together with. I completely understand that it might be harder for some people who are introverted or have social anxiety to socialize, but in that case I really recommend to work firstly on yourself because a lot of the times those things are triggered by insecurities and a bad relationship with oneself. I also recommend to practice with people online or people who know nothing about you, because that’s the thing: they know nothing about you. If you’re insecure, they don’t know that. If you’re acting in a confident way even though you’re not, they’re also not going to know because they don’t know the way you think or act.

Maybe the problem is YOU. Ifyou’re always losing friendships and struggling to maintain them, maybe the common denominator is you because you have issues you need to introspect. Focus on yourself for some time and fix all the issues that might be making you repel high-value people such as being insecure, romanticizing your sadness, having toxic and jealous behaviors…

II. WHERE AND HOW TO MEET PEOPLE

Like-minded communities !! You need to utilize the resources you have to make friends. friends that last are the ones who think in a similar way and who share similar values and interests, and you’re more likely to find like-minded people in like-minded communities. Build up the courage to go and do things alone so you become comfortable in going to places to meet people alone.

Some like-minded communities can be classes in which they teach hobbies of yours because when there’s a community of people whom you have to coexist with you will be forced to work together in a team and talk to each other and that will make it a lot more easier to make friends. Plus, you’re taking the same class so you’re going to have an interest/hobby to bond over which means automatic conversations without any awkwardness. Another option is to become a regular literally ANYWHERE. Ranging from a coffee shop to a gym, when you become a regular you familiarize with the staff and other regulars.

We’re living in an era in which technology can help you with almost anything. Use this to your advantage! Make online friends, use social media to search for like-minded people, download apps to make friends such as bumble bff…

III. HIGH-VALUE FRIENDS.

Now that you’ve prepared yourself and know where to find friends, let’s talk about how to know when someone is right for you.

Look for people who strive to be the best version of themselves and who are surrounded by positive energy. You are who you surround yourself with, so make friends that bring you positivity and who inspire you. Make sure that you both share how you want your future to look like and have similar future plans. Meshing well with them is a must. For example, someone who prefers and feels more comfortable having low maintenance friendships won’t match with someone who prefers to have high maintenance friendships.

And of course, respect is needed. You cross my boundaries? You’re out. Any sort of toxic or jealous behavior is NOT normal and you should not be friends or be influenced by that type of people.

IV. WHAT TO TALK ABOUT AND HOW TO BE A GOOD FRIEND.

Do NOT come off as desperate. “What if they don’t like me?” Thinking like that will only make you be so immerse in your thoughts that all of your confidence will disappear. Focus on having a “How can I make them feel comfortable and understood?” mindset, you’re now not thinking only about yourself and being self-conscious, so you’re going to appear more confident and since now you’re focusing on listening and making the other person feel comfortable you will make an amazing first impression.

Ask them questions about themselves. People love talking about themselves and this will immediately make them like you. Do not make it look like an interview, tho. Make sure you provide your input too which shouldn’t be hard because every question you ask is going to be redirected to you. You can also start the conversation with a compliment!

Friendship is a two way street. It needs to go both ways and you need to follow up with each other. What are they offering you? What are YOU offering them? Think about what can you give without forgetting what can you receive. The type of friend you want is the type of friend you need to be

V. HOW TO MAINTAIN FRIENDSHIPS

Everyone has the type of friendship maintenance they feel more comfortable with, but it's a fact that low-maintenance friendships are tho ones that last. Even if you feel more comfortable having high maintenance friendships, make sure that both of you can accomodate to having to maintain the friendship even when both of you are busy.

COMMUNICATION!!! I assure you that there's probably going to be a lot of hardships and misundersatings in your friendships (And that's not bad, we're human) and no proper communication will lead to the deterioration of the friendship.

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pinksoullesswench · 5 months

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Cute, cozy ways to survive winter

- buy a winter-ish tea to warm you up in the morning and the evening. You can also make your own mix (I love cranberry and elderberry)

- take vitamin D3 to boost your mood and prevent seasonal depression

- take beta carotin to have a glowy, tanned skin even without the sunlight

- get a good quality jacket from a material like wool or hemp (eco), and yes, it will cost a lot, but it's worth it. It keeps your warmer than any cheaper jacket and will last longer. A tip from a broke girl: I started to save up money in June. Also I search only in second-hand stores. I also recommend a faux fur. You can already find nice finds for 90€

- few times a week, make yourself a little bath for your feet. After a cold day, pour hot water into a bowl and put some nice bathing salts or etheric oils, I usually do smth that smells like pine trees. Super relaxing and warms your feet ^^

- read winter-ish books. They help to romanticize the cold time and make the season much more special

- get yourself a nice thick pair of socks that you will enjoy wearing during the winter

- dress warm. I have a special thermal set that I always put under my clothes. Avoid wearing jeans, for they will only make you freeze. Wear thick sweaters (I love cashmere, I bought one cheap in a second hand store), or long warm skirts or dresses (they make me feel girly and special during the cold time) remember, when you buy expensive, good quality clothes keep them in natural colors so they're universal and timeless. Remember: the time of cute outfits is over, now we're in the survival mode

- you can add yourself some color with pretty gloves and hats. I love wearing slavic scarves during the winter to honor my heritage

- when buying a shower gel, perfume, shampoo or body lotion peak smells that remind you of winter. I go for mandarine/ orange scents 😊🍊

- drink vitamin c in the morning!!!

- choose a thicker cream for your face, nothing water-based. Your skin needs special care and protection during the winter. I have an acne prone, oily skin, and I still choose thicker creams, so don't be afraid to do the same. My go-to for winter is a levera cream for sensitive skin and a black cumin seed oil. I also like products from PinusVital.

- uv still exists during winter so don't forget a sunscreen!

- decorate your apartment, room or house with winter decor. I'd defiently focus more on winter related things since they will last until March. Christmas things tend to be thrown away much quicker after Christmas. There's so many cute ideas!

- get yourself a sun clock. It's a lamp you put by your bed, which imitates the sunshine. It's especially useful in early mornings since we humans aren't programmed to be waking up in full darkness. It helps to wake up your body :)

- get yourself a bunch of candles and light them in the evening. Element of fire has always been crucial for our ancestors during these trying times

- every single week plan to do something new. It can be finding a new song or new album, going to a restaurant or a coffee shop you've never been to before, learning something new, visiting a place you haven't seen yet, trying out a new recipe, even taking a different rode back from work/school, write a new poem, start a new book, watch a new movie, keep yourself entertained by little things

- out of the same principle, try to redecorate or change placement of furniture from time to time. Our brains get easily bored and especially during winter it can be very depressing. Brains need the change to stay healthy and fit

- especially during cold times, a community is really important. Even if you're an introverted person, it doesn't mean you should stay alone all the time. Humans are social beings, and we need contacts to one another. During winter months and long evenings, loneliness can be very hard. Try looking for a local book club or knitting club or any other club you'd enjoy. Download Bumble BFF it's an app that helps you to find friends! Volunteer at your local senior house or even your local dog shelter. Being constantly alone has literally never done anyone any good.

- burn incenses to boost energies in your household (any time it's needed, of course if you believe in stuff like this :) ) I recommend orange incense (brings luck and happiness)

- spend time outside. During the week I barely have time but every weekend I try to go on a walk possibly out in the nature. Your mental state regulates this way. Just 15 minutes of walk outside each day can boost your mood. Believe me, it comes from a person who struggled a lot with depressions.

- don't forget to eat well. You burn more calories during the winter because your body uses lots of energy to keep itself warm. Eat regular, well-balanced food portions. I love vegetarian food magazines that offer amazing seasonal recipes, so you cook with vegetables and fruits that actually grow during the winter. I think it adds more magic and meaning to the season to cook with seasonal food.

- wake up early. And early can be different for every person, but sleeping in every day is not proven to be healthy. Sleeping in causes chronic diseases, slows down your metabolism, and can cause social problems. Of course, there's nothing wrong with having one slower day, but having a crazy sleeping schedule can get you in sleep debt that will not result in anything productive.

- pick projects you want to accomplish during winter like for example my projects are: learn about local birds and mammals, make a little house in my local forest, learn how to diy fairy houses, learn how to knit :)

❄️Remember that winter time is the time to slow down and relax. Look around at nature and see how everything is seemingly dead and waiting for the spring. Don't worry if you're not being great all the time or constantly achieving new milestones because it's totally fine to calm down after many months of work. I know that the capitalism convinced us that we should always work, no matter what, but I just want you to remember that nature intended otherwise and of you're more tired and sleepy during these months that's totally normal. Just be kind to yourself.❄️

#winter #winter time #christmas #yule #cosy #cute #diy #girlhood #slow living #life hacks #hygge #witchcraft

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woman-respecter · 2 months

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I'm the anon who'd told you about two of my ex best friends, one who dropped me after I stood up to her for mocking me over the guy I liked and one who dropped me with zero explanation after a decade. I've had multiple close friends drop me and have talked to two separate therapists about it and the friends I do have. And you know what? Sometimes, it really is *them*, not you. Sometimes, we attract shitty people and shitty friends, not because there's something wrong with us, it's usually because we're actually too nice and let shitty people get a pass too damn much. Sometimes, it's just bad luck too. My point is that losing friends is very painful but that doesn't mean it's you. Please take care of yourself. You're on the apps so why not download Bumble BFF too? There's no shame in needing to find new friends who will treat us better than our asshole ex friends

i appreciate you anon but it really is a me thing. its been like this with every friend i’ve had since i was very young. i just have something deeply wrong with me that makes me impossible to be friends with and i have to face that

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slut-jpeg · 8 months

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downloaded bumble bff and then very soon after went to the mental hospital. had to be like “hey! sorry for not responding! I’ve been experiencing the horrors of life but I’m hoping to soon experience the delights! how have you been?” as if I didn’t almost off myself

#personal #is it a little cringey??? yes possibly #but hopefully they’ll get it #and if they don’t then they’re not meant to be

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propertyofkylar · 1 month

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i downloaded bumble bff twice bc i really wanted to make friends in the area i live, but each time i ended up ghosting people after only a few days. bc my insecurities kicked in. i fall out of touch with every friend i make bc of this and my bestie is my only long-term friend simply bc i know them irl and they live on the other side of my hometown.

i have this thing called ‘Fear of Being Known’ and i stress so hard about what people are gonna think of me to the point i get nauseous, but my bestie and i bonded over our similarly shitty lives and families and they openly accept my weirdness (bc we’re both autistic i think), so i’m cool with them. also we met irl first before we were friends, so i didn’t have the buffer of my online persona

-slp

whooo went on a bit of a tangent there, i only wanted to mention i also downloaded bumble bff in the past

bumble bff lowkey scary tbh and a good reminder of how truly offputting i am since i have made zero matches.

n no worries i am the same all i have is my partner and my one irl best friend and we’ve been friends since sophomore year of high school so we are kinda stuck together now. OH WELL BACK TO MY TUMBLR DEGENERATE GAY NEURODIVERGENTS

#slp anon

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csuitebitches · 1 year

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i saw ur response to an anon who has been isolating and i’m literally in the same boat except the isolating isn’t my choice 😭 i moved to a diff country and am studying virtually as of rn. like i text ppl from where i used to live regularly and get ignored more than half the time, as of this week i decided to not waste my energy when i was sending 2/3 messages and getting no responses. like idk what to do i feel so lostt and feel like such a loser 😭

Okay! So. Every person’s situation is different. You can take bits and pieces of what I’ve told the other anon and make it applicable to your own life but you can’t fully apply that advice to your life.

I hope you’re ready for some tough love because that’s what we do here.

You’ve moved to a different country. That’s amazing. What an incredible experience you’re already having!

Now that begs the question - why on Earth would you interact with people from your past life when they don’t even reciprocate the friendship?

If I had to guess, that’s your way of avoiding the current situation you’re in, for some odd reason. It could be because you’re in an unfamiliar country and you don’t know anyone, and therefore you’re trying to hang on to your existing social life in another country. I’m assuming that your country of residence is free of covid restrictions.

The reality is that it doesn’t work that way. I went abroad for uni too, and I felt lonely as hell in my first few months. I didn’t particularly like my class except for like 5 people. I wanted to go out and explore the country I was in so I downloaded Bumble BFF and made new girlfriends.

I felt so much better when I managed to make a couple of friends, which eventually blossomed into a beautiful big friend circle. But I had to be uncomfortable initially. I had to approach people, make new friends slowly and maintain that relationship.

It’s so much easier making friends when you’re 5 years old and in a sandbox. But as you grow older, it takes more time to develop a relationship. Focus on your PRESENT. Focus on what you have. Focus on the people and the environment around you.

Join some sort of organisations / book clubs / hiking club / sports club / go to a certain cafe, make friends with the barista - how do you expect to make friends when people don’t even know you exist? Go and put yourself out there!

#q/a #new life

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angesaurus · 2 years

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Why is trying to make friends so scary????? Anytime someone reaches out to me that I don’t know very well, I panic. And then me reach out to someone????? Lol that’s funny. I just feel like no one likes me and I’m so awkward. I can be really quiet if I don’t know you and it comes off like I’m really rude/not interested. Like Gavin has a birthday party this weekend and it’s a mom we have done soccer and play dates with (Gavin’s BFF basically from his grade) and I still just feel so awkward still.

I downloaded bumble but then I get so self conscious. And I am thinking of joining our local center to exercise and trying some classes but I just know I’m going to be awkward. I got two invites for things to do this week and I’m like panicking over them. These 2 moms (one was our old neighbor) reach out to me and I just don’t know how to reach out to THEM. It always feels like I’m trying too hard lol

#social anxiety is fun

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cupid-styles · 4 months

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I also need bestie talk:(((( but like irl cuz it just gets lonely you know??? Like how hard it is to make friends jcjdiskdjdwo it takes sooo much time and effort to choose the not so toxic people. :(((((

cutie pie :(((( I absolutely understand you!!! it’s nice to have ppl but regardless that bestie time irl is way more satisfying! it’s SO hard to make friends I agree! if you live in a place where it makes sense I’d honestly recommend downloading bumble bff. I moved to a new city a few years ago and found some girlies on there that I click w and have become such important ppl in my life!! i have literally not made friends in person w ppl (that we didn’t already have mutual friends) since college so try social media too!!!!! the girlies that get it, GET IT and won’t be weirded out if u reach out to be like omg love your shirt where’d u get it from where do u shop or if you just have something in common w them! this got too long fjdkdhdjd but im sending you soooo much love and I hope you’re able to find some besties soon<3

#bestie asks

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dykekakashi · 5 months

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i downloaded bumble bff days ago and still haven't made my profile bc i don't have pics on my phone lmaoooo. should i even try this

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ruhro7 · 2 years

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Making friends is something I'm really going to give a go starting now! I downloaded a few different apps that have friendship listed as a possibility (Hinge, Bumble, HER). I've applied for a volunteer position at my local library (fingers crossed). And I'm trying to follow through with it instead of letting the panic and fear stop me! I'm probably going to be chatting about this on here, fair warning. I'll make a tag (Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Ro) that you can block if you'd like, though I know I don't have many people following and no one is obligated to continue following me should they not want to!

So a big issue that I'm worried about facing is just what to do with people if I make friends or if we decide to meet up and see how we vibe. I'm compiling a list IRL, though I may add it to here in case it can help anyone facing similar! Looking online, a lot of suggestions are to go to a movie, or travel, or music, gaming, etc. I can't do any of that (currently) so I'm trying to find alternates that still get me out of the house (which is another goal of mine).

I've noticed a few issues so far (writing this paragraph a few days later). One of those is that folks are coming on to me, and then seem to be hinting about it further even after I say no, I'm on here for friends only, thanks. And I don't know if that's just the trauma talking that makes me think that they aren't fully getting that I mean no, not happening and not no, ask me again but in a different way.

Another issue is the actual conversations! I'm pretty out of practice, so I don't know if this is common now or not, but people aren't talking so much? Like I'll try and just ask some light questions, getting to know you kind of thing, and they'll be like yeh XD and that's it? But then texting me later like "heyyyyy"? How am I supposed to respond to any of that? I haven't practiced for those kinds of conversations, I didn't know conversations could be like that? What's the right response?? I've got down basic back and forth and trying to be light and funny but IDK what to do here???

And to think, I'd told my therapist last week that I wasn't so worried about initial conversations because I do have that practiced. My mom and her husband always had new friends over so I'm used to that kind of interaction and I know what to do, or so I thought! I was clearly wrong and now I need to go back to the drawing board! And I need to tell C when I see her thursday that I need help. Thank goodness I wrote everything I was feeling down to tackle.

I digress, I might try to open up my distance requirements on Bumble BFF. There's only one person on there within my distance (yay living out in the middle of nowhere compared to the rest of the places around me lmao). And I'm keeping my fingers crossed on the volunteer opportunity, I hope to hear back from them. I've spoken with two nice-seeming girls, I just hope that I can get a handle on this whole 'chatting' thing better. And to work through my panic about it, but that's for therapy!

I'll post in a moment the ideas I've had for activities and things that sound nice to do that I might be able to handle. After all, someone else might be interested in seeing things beyond "movies, clubbing, and watch a show together".

#supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Ro #making friends #spoonie #dyspunktional

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piecesofmicorazon · 8 months

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superstar summer

this has been one of the best summers of my life. it reminds me of that sweet and sweaty summer of 2021. where i was outside like no other, meeting so many new girls, singing afrobeats in the park, and everything in between.

a couple months ago, a friend i had considered to be a close friend had said something that shook my entire existence. that i was overstepping the line of enjoyment, and she didn't want to invest in this friendship. i tried to play it so cool. i really did, but i realize now that it hurt me so much. and it's traumatized me. maybe it was a good wake up call, but it was still super hard to wake up to.

my last journal entry, i was crying and waking myself up to tears because i wondered where my friends were. do i have any friends? in a desperate effort, i downloaded bumble bff and tried to make friends with every girl on there.

but then, i reluctantly went to mike and fami's cookout and met allison for less than 5 minutes.

and then bravely, i asked her to get boba a few weeks later.

a week later, we went to a cookout that was rescheduled to then meet ryan.

never would i have thought that it would've brought me to this moment here.

never would i have thought that i'd be hosting an event at cafe erzulie with them.

i am living the life i have always dreamed about. i am so happy to have these two new friends that i already love so much. i pray with all my heart that they will be my friends forever. friends i can open up to, feel completely safe and heard with, investment friends, friends forever.

i'm so happy and have found the friends i have been praying about. so happy that i even forgot i was praying about this, until i came on here and read my last entry.

but isn't that just how He works.

thank you Jesus, i have never known a love or happiness like this. please don't let it fade. i am so scared that something bad will happen or that this friendship will fade, because sadly that's just life. and that's how my friendships have gone. i pray this one will be different.

amen.

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christinaking · 9 months

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I downloaded bumble bff today because I’ve been trying to manifest some new friends and you can’t manifest something if you don’t also take steps to have it.

Way out of my comfort zone, but that’s where we grow! 💗

#mine #personal #level up #self improvement

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paypigswanted · 10 months

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i just downloaded bumble bff and i think having to ogle pics of myself to upload for people to swipe if i'm friendable = truly a form of torture.

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justagirlwithanxietysposts · 11 months

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i recently downloaded bumble bff to find friends near me as i’ve been living here for 3 years and have yet to make any friends. i’m going to lunch with a girl tomorrow and i am so nervous, i’ve never done anything like that before. hopefully she likes me and i like her and we can be friends

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