"What about the boat scene?"
"The boat scene, Doctor?"
"The boat scene! The famous boat scene I told you to pay specific attention to while you were watching the film, remember?"
"Ah, yes, the boat scene."
"Well?"
"I thought Sofia looked a bit cold. Her wardrobe seemed out of keeping with the weather."
"Is that really all you have to say about Goncharov? No comments at all about the plot, the characters, the fruit stand scene or- or- the clock symbolism! I thought you'd love this film! There's so much to analyze!"
"My dear Doctor, I hope you realize that the clock symbolism was trite at best."
"Garak you can't mean that!"
"Oh but I do! It was far too heavy handed to be interesting. It was as though they had to bring up the passage of time in every scene!"
"That's the point Garak! It's the passage of time that haunts them! Goncharov can't escape it for the entire film!"
"I see what they were trying to accomplish and I applaud the effort made but I prefer my symbolism to be a bit more subtle. After a certain point it gets to be a tiresome. It was as though they didn't trust the audience to reach this conclusion on its own. A child could figure it out with less prompting."
".....So you didn't like the movie."
"I think, Doctor, this is one of those times where our differences in taste are.....too different."
"Ah. Well."
"However.......with a few changes here and there, Cardassian influenced changes of course, Goncharov could be a masterpiece yet."
"You're just saying that to tease me, aren't you?"
"On the contrary Doctor. I believe there is some underutilized potential here. Let's start with Ice Pick Joe-- now there's a man with a trustworthy face! I would have liked to learn a bit more about him and his family....."
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wish list for people who don’t want anything
aka possessions which are just possessions, but which have noticeably improved my quality of life: for when people ask you “what do you want for your birthday/Christmas/graduation” and you instantly transform into St Francis and pledge fealty to Lady Poverty because your mind went blank
nice. new. sheets. I cannot emphasize this one enough. if you’re still using the same sheets you had in college, you should probably get new ones. get yourself some 100% bamboo rayon sheets—they're silky and perfect for summer and great for sensitive skin! or, if you’re cold all the time, flannel sheets!
kitchen knives. or even just one really good kitchen knife.
new curtains—blackout if you are a creature of the night like I am
fleece lined anything, but especially sweatpants and hoodies. wool lined socks are also good. if you don’t have the option of coming home after work and putting on an entire outfit that is loose and fuzzy, you should change that, because you deserve that option.
cookie sheets with a layer of air between the top and the bottom. the bottoms of your cookies will never burn again.
kitchen scale!!! no more leveling off flour with a knife and getting it all over the table!! now all your measuring is just shoveling stuff in and out of bowls like you’re at the beach. baking is both more accurate and also way more fun.
coffee bean grinder. if you want to upgrade your coffee experience, this is a great one-time purchase. just-ground beans have a much better flavor than pre-ground.
CDs!! ask for a gift card and expand your physical music collection! or a collection of the DVDs for your favorite show!
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9am: Pirlouit & I are waiting for the farrier; it's Hoof Day! The farrier always tends to run late so I have a thermos of tea and a breakfast pastry to eat as we wait. Pirlouit has been offered some hay and has refused to eat it because he's sulking because it's hoof day.
Isn't it nice to get a pedicure, Pirou?
9:10am: The farrier is late and Pirlouit is worried, wondering what we're waiting for here on the road. Maybe he has been sold? to a sadistic new owner? who's going to shove him into a crate and send him to the salt mines like the donkeys in Pinocchio? Plus, he's more stressed than usual today because one of his hooves hurts (hence the farrier appointment), he's been limping for a few days and he doesn't know what the farrier will do to the hurt hoof. I told him there's only a 30% chance that he'll amputate it.
9:15am: Pirlouit's family is here to support him though! Or, in the case of Pampérigouste, here to puzzle out a vexing mystery.
9:17am: The llamas have grown bored of standing there in support and have started eating the brambles near the gate (supportively). Very good initiative, I approve. Also I thought Poldine was trying to eat the brambles outside the gate (greener on the other side and all that) but no, she was trying to fit her head through the bars for a little kiss </3
9:20am: Even Merricat is being supportive. (Well, she's waiting for me to go home so she can finally take her first morning nap in my lap.) Also Pirlouit has found some grass under the leaves and temporarily forgot all of his worries.
9:22am: Poldine is determined to kiss this cat.
9:24am: The farrier is here! As always he starts doing Pirlouit's hooves right there in the middle of the road, and if a car shows up well, "they can wait a few minutes... On n'est pas aux pièces" (this is a phrase for "there's no rush" that I've never heard anyone but my grandma use, it's nice to hear it again!) There aren't any cars anyway.
9:27am: Pirlouit's hurt hoof has been diagnosed: he has an abscess. Since this autumn has been relentlessly rainy I thought perhaps it was a fungal infection—but the farrier told me he's been treating a lot of abscesses lately, as the very wet weather softens hooves which allows bacteria to enter.
9:30am: The abscess was successfully drained and Pirlouit is now wearing a fashionable hoof bandage. He was very calm and brave throughout <3
9:35am: The farrier left his car by the side of the road, and after releasing Pirlouit we crossed the pasture to go home have a cup of coffee.
9:45am: The farrier is gone; end of the post :)
10am: Pampe is gone, too.
Well, she probably left around 10am but I didn't immediately find out as I had more pressing problems. After the farrier left I went to get a small apple to reward Pirlouit, and when I returned to the pasture and he came over for his treat, I realised he was limping. But on the other side. We've just treated his right front hoof, and he is now holding up the left front hoof...
9:57am: After giving Pirlouit his apple I go home in a hurry to call the farrier and ask him to come back. But there's almost no mobile service around here and I can't reach him. This is so frustrating, he can't be very far... On a hunch I call a horse farm not far from here, maybe it's hoof day for their horses as well?
10am: It's not, they have no farrier appointment today, but when I explain my predicament the woman on the phone goes "if it's just to drain an abscess I can send you a guy who'll do it, no worries!" Every time I've had someone from this farm on the phone to ask something or other, they've offered to Send Me A Guy. It's never the same guy too, they have an endless supply of guys.
10:05am: Having accepted gratefully, I return to the pasture to catch poor Pirlouit again, who thought I was done bothering him for today. As I wait for The Guy, I find a spot with some unexpected mobile service and start googling hoof hardeners, because maybe if Pirou's prone to abscesses it's worth having something in prevention for wet months?
10:15am: I receive a text from the guy.
"Is it normal that your llama is on the road with a dog? They are going to [village]."
10:16am: I reply to the guy.
"It's neither normal nor abnormal."
10:17am: I tie Pirlouit to a tree and run back to the barn to get some muesli. Then start running on the road, trying to figure out how Pampe escaped, and the answer seems obvious: after his coffee the farrier crossed the pasture again to get back to his car, and he knew about the Special Anti-Pampe Safety Knot 3000 but either forgot and closed the gate like a normal person, or didn't do it correctly. Pampe in her little llama brain knows very well that most visitors don't know about the Anti-Pampe Knot so she hurries to check the gate after a stranger leaves her pasture. Meanwhile I was busy noticing Pirou's limp and trying to call the farrier back and I didn't check the gate as I usually do.
10:20am: The guy has found me trotting on the road with my muesli and picked me up in his car. We go back to where he last saw Pampe. I apologise for wasting his time and he tells me "I've heard of your llama" in a tone half-sympathetic half-fatalistic.
10:24am: Pampe & Pandolf have been located; are having the time of their lives. Pandolf is a bit sheepish when I call him, though. He loves going on adventures with his best friend so much but he knows it's a bad dog thing to do for some reason :(
10:34am: The Guy is trying to push Pampe forward with his car while I try to attract her towards me with my muesli in a carrot-and-stick routine; Pampe occasionally veers off-road to eat some leaves, inspect the mud in the ditch, pretend to admire a cloud while secretly brainstorming strategies.
Guy's commentary: "This is worse than dealing with an escaped horse. I feel ignored. I feel powerless."
10:39am: Pampe is home! She didn't actually go very far. But since she hadn't locked the gate behind her, when we arrived we found Pampelune on the road as well, just sort of waiting for us like a sentinel. Pirlouit was still tied to his tree staring at his inexplicably orange foot, and Poldine was panicking because her mother had abandoned her for the millionth time and her grandma had left the pasture too and she couldn't figure out how :((( All she had to do was fiddle with the gate with her nose really, but it never occurred to her to do so, she's too innocent. She only inspects gates in order to figure out how to kiss someone through them. So she was alone in the pasture trotting in circles, making undignified sad goat noises when Pampe & I returned.
10:53am: Pirlouit's other hoof has been treated, hopefully he'll feel better and stop limping soon... I'll have to remove the bandages with scissors, clean both hooves and re-do the bandages in a couple of days which is probably going to be a whole Thing, considering he's suspicious of buckets of water and scissors and objects in general. But as for now everyone is in the pasture having some celebratory hay and Pampoldine is deeply relieved to find that she hasn't been abandoned by everyone forever (as she assumes every single time.)
Also I realised I only paid the farrier half of what I owed him... I had prepared the exact sum but I had half in one pocket and half in another which was a risky idea. And neither of us checked what I was handing him, or noticed. He called me back when he arrived in a place with mobile reception and I told him about the whole affair and he said it's a good thing I accidentally paid him half because he didn't see the other abscess and failed to make the Anti-Pampe Knot 3000 so "it's a fair discount." So I got a half-price farrier visit thanks to Pampe (partly)... I won't tell her because she already thinks she's doing the world a favour by escaping (free fence integrity checks, free cardio training for me by forcing me to do interval running, free entertainment for everyone, plus her modest contribution to cosmic chaos.)
11am: I meant to take an "all's well that ends well" photo of the whole family but I realised Pampe is making her angry hammerhead shark face because her adventure was very short-lived and I didn't even take a picture of her escape, as I'd left my phone in my coat pocket under Pirlouit's tree (& supervision) when I went after her. (I figured I was about to run for 15min and would not need my heavy coat)
She thinks I did it on purpose to demoralise her by refusing to document her victories. But she's not giving up.
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Am I the asshole for trying to kill my boyfriend even though I don't seem to remember it?
I (18M) met my current boyfriend (24? 25?M) because he was investigating me for being a mass murderer (I'm not), long story short after I was cleared of suspicion when my dad tried to fake-kill me and my sort of ex-girlfriend M (19F) and we spent some time chained together (you can check my post history for that one), we started dating. Even though we're now working together to find the actual killer, whenever he gets mad at me or we get into a fight, he brings up the fact I tried to kill him to win the argument, which I say is both really petty and stupid because I am NOT a murderer, but he insists I just don't remember it. Last time he brought it up, I really didn't know how to respond to him, so we haven't spoken in two days, which is also derailing the investigation. The other people in our team try to defend me most of the time, but they also want me to let it go so we can keep working. AITA??
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