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antianakin · 4 months

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I just got the chance to watch a full playthrough of Jedi: Survivor (I haven’t the funds to be able to play it myself 😭), and IDK if it’s just me but there were two things that bugged me. The first one being just how casual Cal seemed to be about killing his enemies— obviously he killed mooks in the first game, but in this game heads were rolling left and right, seemingly without a care in the world.

And that brings me to the second thing; I’m not certain it was just this guy’s playthrough or not, but it bugged me that the Dark Side was not only used as a significant power up, but seemed necessary to complete the final boss fight of the game without insta-dying. Obviously the Dark Side can feel like it’s more powerful in the moment, but the way the game seemed to passively encourage you to use it without consequence. Again, I haven’t played it, so I don’t know that for certain, but it certainly looks that way.

What are your thoughts on the matter?

I think the important thing to remember about Cal's story is that it's a video game and video games, by necessity, are going to be told a different way than the usual narrative. Cal is always going to have to kill a lot of enemies without it being that big of a deal because that's how these kinds of video games WORK. He's going to murder basically every stormtrooper and Imperial officer he comes across because that's the mechanics of the game. But we see that he offers the Ninth Sister mercy initially, he doesn't WANT to kill her, he only does so because she begs him to and it's more merciful to kill her than leave her alive. It's not cold-blooded murder. Same with Bode, he doesn't WANT to kill Bode and he TRIES to get Bode to stop so that he doesn't have to, but Bode refuses and Cal has to defend himself.

If you want to try to look at a more in-narrative reason for why Cal kills a little more often, Cal is a Jedi in a time when it's a death sentence to be a Jedi and the support he has is incredibly minimal. NORMALLY, Jedi wouldn't kill this much, but Cal is openly a Jedi and openly fighting the Empire to the point that his face is displayed really prominently on wanted posters in the middle of Coruscant. He's a huge target and he's trying to take down a galactic Empire. That's not something you can do peacefully and it takes everything he has just to survive. He's not living in a time of peace nor does he have the support of a major organization like the Republic to back him up the way he was supposed to, so he can't necessarily get away with being more merciful here. So yeah, he's more willing to kill stormtroopers and Imperial officers when necessary on a mission (and it's OFTEN necessary). While I don't think that necessarily indicates bad writing or anything, I DO think that it makes sense that Cal, as someone who's been doing this for five years now, isn't holding back very much.

Also, the storyline in this game is all about Cal having to struggle with his own darkness. In Fallen Order it was more about Cal figuring out what it means to be a Jedi, he's going around helping people a lot and seeing how other people are fighting against the Empire. In Survivor, he's been Knighted already and he's been out there fighting for five years. Everyone he cared about has wandered off to do their own thing and he has to build up a new crew that are almost all immediately killed off, starting Cal's struggle with darkness and feeling abandoned and losing his hope. He's confident now, and he is slowly losing more and more of the things he started to rely on, and that comfort with killing evolves into his more literal struggle with the dark side and having to let go of his own anger and fear and pain. He CAN'T use darkness to kill, he can't kill out of anger. And that's exactly what he does. It's hard, he nearly loses it, but he's able to hold himself back just enough to keep himself from completely falling. So while I think it's UNDERSTANDABLE that Cal, as a Jedi openly fighting against the Empire during this time period, would be more willing to kill people than show mercy in order to complete a mission, it's also part of the overall story being told about Cal in this game.

For the final battle, you DO have to use the dark side power-up thing in the fight, but the fight itself is just game mechanics, the CUT SCENES are the important story bits. Cal wins that fight WITHOUT killing Bode, he makes a whole speech about letting go, and then he turns away and when he DOES kill Bode, it's not with the power-up, it's not out of anger, it's just basic self defense. It's not entirely unlike Obi-Wan vs Maul in TPM where Obi-Wan IS sort-of reacting out of anger and a desire for vengeance earlier on but has to let that go BEFORE he kills Maul. Luke COULD kill Vader out of anger, we see how close he gets, but he ultimately chooses not to because he recognizes he shouldn't. Cal's fight with Bode is following in those same footsteps narratively. He DOES pull on darkness during the fight, but he's ultimately able to let go and doesn't KILL Bode with that darkness at all. It's a pretty basic Jedi storyline we've seen a few times before.

When dealing with video games that are telling the story, it's very important to separate the video game mechanics from the actual story. Quite often, the story itself isn't told through the regular gameplay and the gameplay can even contradict the story we're being told. For example, if you keep playing Survivor after the final battle with Bode, you can STILL USE THE DARK SIDE POWER UP even though Cal has NARRATIVELY moved away from that darkness already and would theoretically not actually be using it anymore at all and certainly not in like... regular little battles against the local wildlife. You can also obviously utilize it that way between the moment you DO get the power-up and the final battle, even though Merrin has already talked about how dangerous it is and asked Cal not to use it. The power-up in game mechanics is JUST a power-up, it has no character impact at all to use it. It's just another tool in your arsenal until you get to the cut scenes. What the dialogue is telling us is almost directly contradicted by how the gameplay works.

Hopefully this helps you a little. I like the characters and the story enough that I'm willing to sort-of work with what they give me to create a narrative that fits the way I want it to. I think there's a good story in Survivor about the impact of being a survivor of a genocide and having to fight against the people who want you dead for YEARS. I generally like the way that's handled and the messages being sent in this story. I think there's areas that are a little awkward and moments I like slightly less, but overall I really enjoyed it.

#star wars #jedi survivor #cal kestis

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tmbatcat · 1 month

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YEAH!!! YEAH!!!!!!!!!! TELL ME ABOUT YOUR SKILLS!!! :D!!!!!

HEELL YYEE!!! Let me just spill my guts out !!

This may be a little long :]

(You may know this but is good to recap)

Ok, small story time! Basically I drew them becourse I read spilledkaleidoscopes works and in the second part Kim gets his own skills and there are only 8 and I was like "Fuck, If I were to make my own skill I am not forced to the albatrairie number 24 and also not forced to include all of physique and motorics gangs and i could just mix and match and nobody would care." so that's basically what I did

i took me 20 hours to figure their designs out (I am not kidding btw, i looked through the ibispaint recording) and 10 more to render them out to a point that i would say it's acceptable (i would have stayed longer if i wasn't physically and mentally tired of this little project and i also told myself that they will never be perfect and that OK)

more drawings for your pleasure (some not posted yet)

Ok now let's actually talk about the 8 dummies: (i will compare them to Harry's skills and other stuff for better understanding)(also I will includes an edgy description) [anything in square brackets are just my notes over the skill]

DOUBT - LOGIC + anxiety + masking - Logic tainted by how many times you got burned. You now know what to hide; all your cracks and imperfections. Your mask won't peel from your face, you forgot to take it off at some point and now you don't ever remember what you look like. Good luck with that, people would hate you more without it and you know it; I bore that though your head everyday.

[The little Jean in all of us. A strung up anxious mess that can't understand that people actually like you and that perfection is impossible. A lil hater.]

MECHANICAL HEART - EMPATHY + video game/movie logic - Understansing through empathy and pattern recognition. Don't understand someone? That's OK, use your vast knowledge of media to put them into little boxes and label them. People are more complicated than that but I am just a tool. I tune in on everyone and everythings frequency and if you don't understand something you look through the file drawer of your mind.

[My internet riddled brain can only understand tropes. I have so much brainrot that it can not be contained, it spreds to everything]

SENSOR - ENDURANCE + PERCEPTION + INTERFACING + autism - Caretaker of the temple. For other people it's automatic. Sadly, yours isn't. You forget to eat if nobody reminds you. So that's why I'm here. Your nerves are also more sensitive than most. It doesn't help that the world has so many textures and hard edges. I relay all the info as soon as I get it, though it's late most of the time.

KNOW-HOW - ADHD info dump (basically ENCYCLOPEDIE) - Keeper of the librarys. You know, your mind is like a library, but without any of the labeling a normal library would use. More of a big collection of storys and fun-facts you know. When you don't ask them for a piece of information in particular, they chime in with something that is vaguely connected to the conversation.

WILLPOWER - VOLITION + a crumb of SHIVERS - Makeing peace with it all. I am silent most of the time but not, because I don't care. I talk only to remind you of the world's humanity. When you are at ypur lowest. You need to go on. You can take a break, maybe cry a little, but never actually give up. The world doesn't end with you, and it's worse without you in it.

[they don't talk a lot cuz I am a depressed lil bitch]

DAY DREAM - INLAND EMPIRE + VISUALIZATION + CONCEPTUALIZATION - Close your eyes and see other worlds. Colors, characters, ideas, scenarios; all swirling in that little head of yours. They just make the puppets move for your own amusement. They unfortunately play with your puppet too, making you watch scenarios wherein you die a lot, but what can you do? You can't stop it. It has it upsides through, mainly escapism.

CHASE - ELECTRO-CHEMISTRY + ADHD hyperactivity + autistic hyperfixation - Longing for paradise and ambrosia. Comfort over anything else. They love to indulge and party. Not actually party. You know, more like watching youtube alone or with friends while eating chips at 2 AM. That is your type of party. Your batteries run low most of time, so a good game and a snack also work.

[ELECTRO-CHEMISTRY but a bit chiller, no drug related stuff, if sugar doesn't count. They just love good brain juice]

FLARE - HALF LIGHT + PAIN THRESHOLD - The fire that burns within us all. A caged animal that hisses at anything that comes near. In general it sits in corner, waiting, only popping it's head out to shriek profanities at whatever rattled the cage. All bark, no bite. A problem that you have is that you forget how people wronged you, but I'm here, I remember. Only emotions, but that is enough. You shouldn't give out so many second chances.

[stressed out little creature]

They also hate each other so fucking much AAAAAA I have a headache

I also wrote a small story with all of them in another post... I want to write some more small storys of mine if i could think of anything funny that happend and that would work in the Disco Elysium dialog style

you can also make your own skills if you want, i may be annoying but I believe in you <3 don't know what else I could add

#aaa looot of text #sorry guys #this is a long one #my bad #text #my skills #you just activated my hyperfixation :]#disco elsyium #my art #digital art #art

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crystalsenergy · 3 months

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Vulnerability and human life ✨

~theme song: Resolution by Yasuharu Takanashi

(reflection pills series

by Paty | crystalsenergy)

so, what about it?...

and what if I told you:

"Express your greatest fear now. Face it, if you feel like crying, cry. Let it out. Sigh. If your chest hurts, cry more. Then, take a deep breath. It will pass. You will have let it out. And face what you feel."

...Would you say this to me?: "Wow, Paty, that's intense, why?"

if so, I'll respond: No, that isn't intense.

I am doing what needs to be done.

→ and what needs to be done?

encourage people to live naturally with the most basic thing we need to live: our feelings, our emotions.

can you imagine how many things we have bottled up and repressed, which generate various issues we face today - patterns of feeling, reacting, living, thinking, deciding. I'm not interested in just continuing my work talking about remedying, remedying, remedying the problems that I always see existing.

it's already clear that if we don't stop at some point to see what may happen because of our current and wrong way of dealing with emotions,

soon we will explode with more and more cases of mental health issues.

the problem will mainly be because the mask of "being fine" will be extremely perfect and almost impenetrable. and then it will be hard to see.

because every day, right now, we reinforce the masks of perfect and beautiful lives. and we rarely make room for what I proposed initially and which, perhaps, was strange for you to read: "cry, feel, face."

but it is also quite clear, from a psychological perspective, that stored, unassimilated, or unrestructured emotions play a significant role in defining who we are.

and although we don't deal well with our emotions, not even directing them properly,

they are our root, the most basic of what we are, the first thing we express when we are born. many of us cry when we are born, and certainly cry when we want to eat, when it hurts.

feeling is the most human thing, and are you pretending you don't have that?

it's not strong or heavy, and if you thought that when I suggested that you do the basics - spend some time with your emotions - it's probably because you're so accustomed to a vibe of not living the most internal things,

sometimes even accustomed to a life of facade, mechanized, only earthly, material, or with a lot of toxic positivity (= 'I feel something bad, and then I quickly replace the sadness with a good feeling, stuffing my sadness in a hole, without facing it, without "sitting" with it, understanding why it arose).

It's obvious that it's something simple, and quite unhealthy to do.

when we force ourselves not to feel, not to have problems, not to go through any internal mess = big negative effect on us and others, including those you don't even know.

because we get unaccustomed to our own vulnerability and we become unaccustomed to the vulnerability of others.

gradually, the natural sensitivity fades. Empathy decreases. we close ourselves off to what involves this. and we reinforce a pattern of nonexistent perfection: "constant positivity".

"Paty, so do we have to show everything?" → Obviously not. there is a huge difference between just not showing everything to everyone (1) and forcing yourself not to feel (2). it's the second case I'm focusing on. because the first one it's so normal, and who are we to disrespect each other's process and way of living their emotions? as long as you live, that's okay. each person will experience this in their own way.

now, I ask you:

was there any week in your life when you were 100% happy every day? cheerful, upbeat? c'mon,

let me know, please.

and on bad days, did you face what you felt?

did you talk about it or express it in some other way? [conversation isn't the only way to express what you feel, although it's very effective]. or did you stuff it into a hole? did you cover it up with some addiction, escapism, or toxic positivity?

Vulnerability. That's what makes us human and that's what connects us.

we long to feel. but, due to human difficulty, we have longed so much to hide and pretend to feel almost nothing, preferring to trivialize others' suffering in favor of egoic self-satisfaction, indifference, aversion, superficiality.

we don't want to admit that we have a lot of the other in us.

we want to spread that we are "self-sufficient" and don't need anyone when in the end, in the middle of the standard trajectory of "detachment" and "self-sufficiency," we have several internal expectations poorly met and extremely misdirected. and this, in the end, isn't even self-sufficiency.

blocking your emotions is blocking your humanity.

in the end, the domino you played comes back and hits your back. it will come back, unfortunately. because you're in the middle of all this: you don't differ from others in the aspect of feeling.

feeling is what connects people and reminds us of the existence of other beings. it's what makes us noble, connected.

the tears of emotion or happiness when someone gets married. It's not you getting married, but you FEEL a bit of the other's happiness.

the tears when you see someone cry, even in a movie. it's not you who feels the pain or sadness, but you feel, because you understand, even if for a brief moment, part of the other's suffering.

the smile from seeing someone achieve something,

the excitement someone transmits to you just by being excited themselves,

Mirror neurons.

the joy in seeing people laughing, ending up laughing along.

just situations to exemplify that what unites us is the feeling. so allow yourself to feel. I already allow you and am open-armed to accept all your sides, no matter how ""ugly"" they may seem, with eternal quotation marks.

It's not ugly to feel. Nor is it ugly to express.

Do not feel or label people who admit their feelings as "weak," or who "will achieve little in the world." stop seeing the next person as your adversary.

if it helps you see the problem: you are close to the other.

with you, it's just you and no one else. following your logic, with the other, it will be just the other and no one else. okay... and when you need it, what do you expect to receive if that's the way you think life works? In an extremely "me, me, me, me" way.

Accept to be more vulnerable, as much as each one can now, whether in the expression of a small affection, an observation gesture, or something big, immense. But let it exist. In your own way, but let it exist.

and it is not necessary to relate to people to remember that you're here to exchange & experience emotions. just look around you: there are so many beings needing you!

#vulnerability #reflection pills #writers on tumblr #writing #my writing #reflective #reflections #contributions #crystalsenergy

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deathb8dy · 1 year

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THOUGHTS ON QUALIA AUTOMATA, TUMBLR EDITION

ORIGINAL POST I MADE WAS PUT ON REDDIT FIRST FROM DISCORD, I'LL JUST COPY AND PASTE WHAT I SAID AS IT'S EASIER. WITH EDITS OFC.

This point on holds spoilers in relation to the newest song 'Lamentations'. Please do not read unless you have seen the song OR are fine with it. Also this all will be copied and pasted from discord with edits to include examples (at least for the lyrics and such.)

If you have any comments or criticisms to make, please do so.

spoilers begin below here.

Even in the initial impression, the song about Fayrouz is the MOST human out of the three. In RBB, it's very mechanical and erratic in wording (no rhyming scheme at all but it still made sense for a song). In EWN it's still mechanical but has some humanity to it if that makes sense.

But both songs of the machines you can tell something is off.

Example in lyrics:

Tamari uses more nonsensical and complicated words as if to compensate for a lack of understanding. These words also tend to not make sense with each other either.

(EX; ‘Invite Suicidation, Transfer Enumeration’ is a great example. Suicidation is obviously about yk. But fun fact, it’s not even a word! And Enumeration is “the action of mentioning a number of things one by one.” Compared to the rest of the song of RBB, it does NOT make sense at all.)

Mariyam has more simple terms used and a rhyming scheme but still reverts to what Tamari does... And also references some really obscure stuff (Such as a french women's asylum!) that no one who would go looking would understand.

(EX; The lyric I mentioned is “Fleeting words in pen, I tell the story of Salpêtrière” with the last word in reference to ‘an institution founded in Paris in 1656 as an asylum for the infirm, aged, and insane. At one time, it contained nearly 10,000 people, and treatment was proverbially brutal.’ Which… is ironic since Mariyam is meant to be a therapist)

Example in art:

Tamari is FULL of references and barely anything that's actually their own design. While cool as hell, Tamari is basically what an AI does... Generate images/prompts based on wording and such. Which is likely why Tamari is so ... erratic!

Mariyam on the other hand does have more original art but most of it is ALL black and white until the end with Tamari. And even then, it's not complicated art with a lot of details unless with Tamari and even then... She still fails to have something to be put to human

And music wise:

Both songs are VERY metallic noise-wise with choir like sounds within the instrumentals. Both beginning and end. Tamari specifically has the "jumpscare scream" while Mariyam has just more "clock/chime" motifs. It's all still mechanical without any sort of "organic" tones if that makes sense

FAYROUZ ON THE OTHER HAND. Despite being the "villain" of the story is the most human.

Lyrics - She uses the most simple BUT effective words that aren't overly complicated/nonsensical (Tamari) or aren't as impactful as they should be (Mariyam)

PV - Unlike the two, I just noticed it's just a static one image pv as well as it's fully colored. Tamari and Mariyam had movements in their pvs, like they are trying to move to humanity but also how AI is always constantly shifting.

Music - THE BIGGEST DIFFERENCE. It has some mechanical elements (like the 'siren' like sounds in the beginning and end) BUT IT HAS MORE ORGANIC SOUNDS UNLIKE THE GRITTY GEAR LIKE SOUNDS YOU HEAR IN RBB AND EWN

Fayrouz also admits to being at fault but pushes on to do better (at her work, mess up on words but ykyk). Which is ironic isn't it? Her creations are more "human" than she is. Which lyrically also- Fayrouz references more mechanical functions while Tamari and Mariyam reference more humane functions.

EX:

Tamari - My stomach turned at the thought of the stars / And my heart pounded louder than the ones I had before

Mariyam - Though you’ll never die, you’ve found that / All eyes are staring at your hands

Fayrouz - Restarting, rebooting null programs / Running, debugging their brains /Forging and sorting successes

AND FINALLY. Tuning wise, Fayrouz sounds more human (if it's intentional or not) but still has the lyrics that are guilt based BUT focused fully on being like a human machine. If you are raised up to be a "machine".... how can you even know otherwise? Tamari and Mariyam are learning to have humanity, Fayrouz lost hers due to the loss of her husband and control over what she had (aka the siblings)

(out of context but it’s related to how different the first two songs are to the newest.)

It makes you think it'll be the same as the two but it's not because Fayrouz is meant to have humanity. She's human after all no?

ANYWAYS.

Basically:

Paradoxical shit of the Robots being more human than their creator who’s losing her humanity with the losses she’s had.

BONUS: Forgot to mention since I made this BEFORE Mors made the tweet out. The title of the series supports what I said heavily.

Qualia, according to wikipedia, "... are defined as individual instances of subjective, conscious experience."

While automata means (according to google) "... a moving mechanical device made in imitation of a human being." but also "...used in similes and comparisons to refer to a person who seems to act in a mechanical or unemotional way."

#; text #[DO NOT TAG AS LONG POST. IT WILL NOT BE REACHABLE.]#qualia automata #ghost and pals #end world normopathy #reckless battery burns #team 6x111 #vane lily

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rebouks · 1 year

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I figured it'd be interesting to pick apart Oscar's nightmare.. for science! Sorta like an author's note ig ⚆_⚆

Groundhog Day: Oscar feels trapped. Every time he tries to sort his shit out, something happens that forces his unhealthy coping mechanisms into overdrive. Every time he tries to fix his relationship with his family, Courtney, etc.. he's reminded how unsafe it might be to keep them close, so he pushes them away again. Every time he and Ivan feel like they're getting somewhere, it's ripped from their grasp again. He's tired, and he's worried that without self medicating, he won't be able to keep going.

The Radio: Nothing too spectacular here. The radio report about Spencer is wishful thinking. At this point, Oscar's not even been in rehab for a full week! There's no way Ivan or even Sid could have worked that fast. The various songs that played over and over are just some of his favourites, though the lyrics are quite applicable to how he feels/what he's going through.

TOOL - Parabola | Forty Six & 2

Oscar's Reflection: Finally deciding to work on himself isn't sitting easily.. Oscar hates introspection. He doesn't like 'looking' at himself, or trying to figure out why he is the way he is. Does he even like himself? Will he ever get to a point where he can stomach the man looking back at him? He doesn't know, and he reaaaally doesn't want to think about it. Little dramatic maybe, but he genuinely has to.. otherwise he might not be around for much longer. He's not lying when he says he legit doesn't understand why Courtney or anyone else loves him. He doesn't think it's a self esteem issue though ⚆_⚆

Courtney: Guilt, basically.. he loves Cookie so so much, but he genuinely feels like she'd be better off if she never met him. He knows his actions (though unintentional) have hurt her deeply, and he knows she's putting on a brave face. Like Oscar, Courtney buries her feelings - she hasn't spoken to him or anyone else about what happened. He's worried about her, but he's also worried that if she deals with those feelings properly, she'll finally realise the danger he unwillingly put her in and leave for good. He's sure it's not the case, though he does wonder if she'd have left if she wasn't pregnant.

Stuffed Animals: A representation of the past, I suppose. Oscar can barely remember being young and carefree, he was a pretty emotionally mature kid, though the way he dealt with those emotions was anything but mature. Now look at you. Oscar's disappointed in himself, and he figures everyone else is too. Courtney's bunny is a little more forgiving though, reminding him that although he might not be happy with himself right now, he can still dream.. aim to be and do better. That's what 'she' means by there's no epilogue to be found in here. This isn't the end of the road, not yet!

Wyatt's Presence/Helping Hand: He's not fond of Wyatt by any means, but he doesn't hate him as much as he says he does; nor does he want him dead. Oscar's a compassionate man who likes to think there's some good in everyone. Wyatt's not the only one who pays close attention to the actions of others.. Oscar's noticed he behaves like a man with nothing to lose, which he finds odd (and fucking scary) because if anything, the opposite is true. He doesn't trust him, he unnerves him, doesn't understand him... But surely no one's a completely rotten apple? Conscious Oscar isn't so quick to admit/believe any of this, but on a subconscious level, maybe.

Ivan's Suicide: Certainly out of character. Ivan isn't suicidal, never has been. No, this is more about Oscar's fear of losing him. He's recently come to realise just how important Ivan is to him, he doesn't feel like he's been a very good friend (hence the reason he was unable to stop Ivan from killing himself). Oscar's been so wrapped up in his own turmoil that he's offered little to no support in return, and he knows it. Ivan's unwavering support and lack of judgement has moved Oscar, kept him going when he didn't think he could. Aside from Courtney and his family, Oscar wants to better himself in part so he can return the favour. The fact that Ivan's still out there working whilst he's stuck in rehab is a scary thought, especially since he's not allowed to contact anyone. He hopes his friend is still alive and well in the waking world.

Oscar's Past Selves: Hindsight is wonderful, isn't it? It'd be too easy for us to go back and warn ourselves of the mistakes we'll make in the future. The only thing we can do is learn from the past and apply that knowledge to our future decisions. Oscar's mostly let go of his grudge where Sid/Alton are concerned, he's tired of being bitter. Sid was busy, not in touch with her maternal side or her emotions... Alton's absent-minded. He needed more attention from them, more guidance, but he never got it. He didn't ask. Perhaps it's too much to ask of a child to realise what they're lacking and request it, but Oscar knows he made his own decisions. Salton/Noah's absence should be noted here, it's fairly important that Oscar's finally looking at himself instead of blaming other people; finally trying to make amends with his history and his choices, however poor they may have been. At the end of the day, we have but ourselves for company... One thing's for damn sure, Oscar's gonna try his hardest to be there for his own kid(s), no matter what.

Extras: I have no idea what two two zero two means. Same goes for the line: that's when it ends. 😉 The threshold is not what it seems... The barriers we place upon ourselves regarding what we can/should think, do, and feel aren't always what they're cracked up to be. Somnia iacebat ruinas = your dreams lay in ruins.

As ever I had no plans before going into this little 'story', though it was fun to take a trip into Oscar's mind. Talk about horror (⊙_⊙;)

#somnium: extra #oscar #extra #twblood #twhorror #twsuicide #oooohhhweeeee #what a ride!#lmk if there's anything still making you ??

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kygerbearr · 8 months

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getting into high-end ff14 content made me realize 2 things.

1). many people who have particular responsibilities have NO business with them

2). apparently i'm a fucking genius when it comes to shit because i can watch a short guide and understand what to do while everyone else apparently needs several days worth of catch up to do one of the most basic be-here-then-go-here shit on the planet. i have never been more frustrated with humanity. i am so tired. everyone i meet is either someone who takes thing too seriously and has zero skills to back it up or there's people with a wife and kids and a 9 to 5 job and a mortgage who come home from work and are somehow fine with doing MORE work dealing with people who dont know their fucking job and everyone is managed by someone who's an absolute pushover and still expects to be the "leader"

like i don't consider myself very smart. everything in this game appears to be very easy, i don't struggle with any of it, i don't understand how all of these seemingly normal people can struggle so hard with mechanics that have been reused over and over with a new coat of paint, and I feel guilty even suggesting its easy because of how hard everyone makes it out to be

do not believe anyone when they say ff14 is hard. it isn't. it's one of the easiest games i've ever played, i have never felt personally challenged by something in it and the only difficulty i'm having is being around dipshits who somehow don't understand how something works. i feel like i'm in a classroom full of people who showed up to the exam without studying anything and it's like they expect a clear just for showing up. buddy, this fight has so much personal responsibility that if you don't figure your shit out, the WHOLE CLASS fails, and you can't move on until you pass.

and i KNOW its easy because I made my OWN group out of frustration and we cleared THE FIRST DAY WE STARTED RAIDING. the VERY FIRST DAY. I have been with this other group for MONTHS.

this group cannot handle clockwise and counterclockwise somehow. there are markers on the floor arranged in a clock. it got to the point where I had to suggest that people look for a particular number and rotate towards it, and somehow, everyone STILL messed it up.

not only that, but in this group, any time I try to express something that goes against their ideology either the leader gets on my case or one of the members gets on my ass. just the other day I had this fucking asshole who was running shield healer who WASNT APPLYING SHIELDS?? during PROG??? and when I said "hey can we get shields" he was like "no we're good" we were dying. bodies on the floor right in front of him.

so I asked why. his argument? we cant have shields. it would mess up his gcds. I have CLEARED THIS FIGHT ALREADY, AND WITH SHIELD HEALER. so I know we can have shield for Every raidwide. and when I tried to explain how, he got angry and was like "no the fuck we cant and i will NOT have someone micromanaging my gcds" buddy my friend is dead on the floor right there and it's your fault

we proceeded to not hear from him the following week. essentially no-call-no-show but for a videogame and not a real job. whatever, not my problem. just meant I could be shield healer. and that day went super well! we had prog. i was healing. we didn't die outside of people failing their personal responsibilities.

i mean it when I say I genuinely don't enjoy the game anymore. I'm so exhausted from dealing with people who don't give a shit and aren't trying hard enough, are too stubborn to do anything different and hate it whenever I do anything whatsoever that goes against their agenda. it's not a team at all, it's a fake ass leader who can't lead with followers who are so fucking mindless braindead that they think they can mindlessly follow this failure of a leader into a clear for a fight they've been stuck on for THREE MONTHS STRAIGHT.

it takes up so much time out of my week (3 hours on both monday and tuesday so back to back, very exhausting, reminder i dont like these people because they treat me like shit and simultaneously I'm the only person who cares about what we're doing) and there were times where I legitimately would've preferred working (which i cant do while playing this game) and man I hope they get rid of me because my martyr complex keeps me from leaving them until we clear the fight

don't play final fantasy 14 it's not fun it's not worth it and if you do then dont talk to anyone. i legit only have fun when its with my friends and I have yet to meet a person on 14 I could make any sort of meaningful connection with. they're all so normal feeling, they're always like 5 years older than me and it freaks me out, I don't fit in, I don't belong there, and I don't want to stick around in a place I don't feel I belong in. the ONLY good thing about the game is that I can play as a big kitty cat

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treecove · 1 year

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ethan is a blood mage, though mostly out of necessity since its not like he has any access to lyrium to replenish his magic when he needs to. he never did deals with demons, and treats it as a tool more than anything.

this is something he learned from daddy dearest- i think that malcolm WAS a blood mage willingly, he just drew the line at daling with demons or using mind domination magics ect. blood magic is something that a lot of apostates would need, since it's not as if they ca just go and get a lyrium potion from a store, at least without raising suspicions. and sometimes you need more magic than your personal reserves can provide.

malcolm made sure to instill bethany and ethan with a sense of respect for magic, although bethany never took up blood magic herself (she's squeamish about the concept of bleeding yourself for magic). ethan knew the theory of it and had done some very minimal usage of blood in place of mana, but didn't start using it outright until the family was forced to flee lothering.

the only reason bethany is alive is because, when they were attacked by the ogre, ethan used blood magic in desperation to kill it after it gravely injured her, AND then to save her life(canonically, bethany dies here if you're playing a mage, so this is my way of explaining how she could still be alive). bethany always kind of felt guilt over that-she absorbed a lot of things from the chantry, anti blood magic sentiment included- so she felt that if she hadn't been hurt in that moment, ethan would never have used blood magic.

this isn't true, though. he'd have needed to use it eventually, especially during the first year in kirkwall, where it was useful while working for athenril's smuggling ring.

thoughts on the kirkwallycule wrt this:

fenris takes a bit to trust him when he realises that ethan is a blood mage, understandably. but seeing that ethan never turns to demons and draws a line at certain practices, AND the fact that he's andrastian despite yknow being an apostate blood mage, he eventually (at first begrudgingly) admits that ok. in THIS case. the blood mage is a decent person. this is also helped by just how hard ethan works to help people around kirkwall, including shutting down tevinter slave rings. the proof is in the pudding ect, and as long as you can prove you have self control and aren't going to rob people of their will, fenris is okay with it in the end.

anders gets on his high horse over it for a bit, until he watches ethan use blood magic to save the lives of people that anders wouldn't be able to save with his own spirit healing. they have a lot of conversations about how blood magic allows different routes and methods of healing, and anders does actually apply some of it to his own magic (since the vengeance mechanic he has is basically blood magic in the game. so.) this also has the added affect of making anders chill somewhat when it comes to merrill's usage of blood magic bc i think the writers made him UNREASONABLY MEAN TO HER.

ofc, merrill is the one that understands and relates to the practice the most, although ethan regularly expresses concern over her dealing with a demon. he personally dislikes making deals with or summoning demons for magic, but he's not going to impose thst on someone else if they clearly are able to make their own informed choices. plus like, dealing with Spirits is a regular thing mages do without blood magic anyways. demons are just more tricky. he insists on being around when she does demon stuff. yknow. Just In Case.

i dont really think isabela cares that much about the blood magic. as long as it's not being used to hurt her or others she cares about, it's not really her business what kind of magic someone is using. she's sensible like that.

sebastian, meanwhile, Hates it. it's one of the biggest parts of why ethan and seb get into a relationship much, much later than all of the others. it's a major point of contention for them, since seb is very traditionally andrastian, and ethan is more radical. they have 'debates' (arguments) a lot over it, including interpretations of the chant and andrastae's words. ultimately though, several years of being a blood mage and yet also being a tried and true good person means that seb has to admit that ethan may be right (but don't let it go to your head, ethan).

#ethan hawke #da2 #oops sorry this is long #so I put it under a readmore

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alostlittleriverlotus · 2 years

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I've Actually Healed

I did a cluster b personality disorder question thing (privately) and some of the answers I gave were validating. Like asking about caring about looks or what a bad episode can be like or some really negative aspects. I got to say "no" or "not anymore" or "used to be, but not now" and it was all so validating. I doubt myself a lot even though I know that I'm healing. But the fact that I could write about how it used to be and have PROOF just by answering questions that I've changed was a wonderfully validating thing. I sent the link to my friend so they could read and they told me they were proud of me. I HAVE made progress, I HAVE healed in some way. I can cope with things better, I have medications that help my hormonal mood swings (birth control) and anxiety meds that help me not be a ball of pure anxiety unable to relax forever. I have some coping mechanisms I've picked up, I have ways to rationalize and understand my emotions I've picked up from therapy sessions, and I've come to unbag my trauma and understand my own reactions, my own triggers everything. It's been 2 years at least (the pandemic in 2020 was a big reason I could start focusing on myself without pressure) and I have changed a lot. I came out to myself, I came out to my friends and my gf, I accepted I had these disorders, I got on medication, I got help for my PCOS, I became educated on racial issues, I found neopronouns that fit me and help me, I learned about tone indicators and began using them, I had a friend on twitter that was the inspiration for me to come out. I've done so much for myself in two years. Many older folks (like my family) may look at me like I have done nothing because I basically almost never work and all I do is stay in my room or text friends, but I feel happier than I used to be...

I feel happy with who I am and I feel more free than ever before.

And that is such an empowering and wonderful feeling. The recent move has helped a lot as well. Since I have a TV in my room, I don't have to get anxious about what I watch since I don't have to worry about my parents coming in. I've processed a lot of my grief and trauma. MA and I are both working on helping ourselves and each other and healing. My relationships with all my friends and my gf are better than ever. People may look at me like I've done nothing, like I'm a failure because I don't work or go to college, or like I'm some entitled brat, but I know exactly what I am doing. I am paying attention to my needs. My diet is better than ever, physical issues like IBS and PCOS are more manageable than ever before, I've expanded my interests into things I thought I'd never try, I'm learning what I need to do for my physical health, I am wearing clothes that fit, I don't rely on self harm, I can open up, I am reigniting my love of reading and can get lost in stories like I used to. I AM better. Just because those boomers don't see it doesn't mean it isn't true.

And so let me finish this with a reminder. It is okay to take time off, it is okay to need to do what you can. It is okay to pay attention to your needs. You do not need to apologize for feeling emotions. Of course if you lose your temper, apologies make sense, but not at a point where you're guilting yourself. This has been important in mine and MA's relationship as we both struggle with blaming ourselves. It is okay to not be perfect. It is okay to not be where your peers are. My friends ARE able to go to college (most of em) and to work and I still see them struggling. A friend of mine has recently moved to a college in another city, a few hours away. I miss her tons and even if she is stressed and it sucks, I know that this is something she's wanted. Why? Because she's away from her family. So even if college sucks, it can still provide an escape if you can manage to move. MA got to spend time with their boyfriend a lot cause they went to college together, got lunch and dinner together, and rode the bus together. My friend R and I can't do those things like my friends can, but R walks dogs and is improving their health and they also pet sit for neighbors. I sometimes work doordash and I can exercise better than before and am improving my diet to be healthier. Just because R and I aren't in college or working normal, regular jobs doesn't mean we've failed because we are better. MA and C might be in college and might struggle because of school and work, but it also provides them freedom from their families and benefits to their mental health. There's pros and cons to everything and what works for you is unique to you. And some people have to work due to capitalism and not having the support that R and I have (despite our toxic family members) and that's entirely valid as well. This whole rant is to say:

Believe in yourself and do what is best for you. Whether it's getting away, what is possible underneath capitalism, small things for your physical or mental health, small coping mechanisms, just taking a fucking break. Whatever it may be, you know your needs best. Your life is unique to you, your needs and necessities, where you are in life. Even if it fits into the mold that is expected of us or whether it lies outside or whether you're disabled and have no choice, it is something you can choose for yourself.

I am disabled due to my disorders, that's why I cannot work. Nobody understands that aside from my gf and friends. But that's okay. Because I am healing :) and I am proud of myself. This is my experience, these are the experiences of my close friends. They are all different in their own way. Even if the jobs sucked and stressed C out, they were able to move away and have some freedom from their family. I know it'll be good for em even if it hurts that it happened so quickly. Your path is yours.

And to anyone struggling, I love you and I'm proud of you. You don't need to justify being worthy of love or just existing. You deserve to hear those words even if you've done nothing. Because you're here and that is a wonderful, wonderful thing.

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brawltogethernow · 2 years

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Hi! Hope your year's going well. Sorry to burst into your inbox with questions but you seem like you'd know this: why is Spidey treated as the Quippy(TM) hero? Pretty much every Marvel hero quips during fights, as far as I know. But if they hear *him* quip suddenly they pretend like they're Serious and Can't Stand Smartass Comments During Fights At All? I get that whoever he's fighting/directing the comments at is supposed to hate it but why do his allies/friends also groan? Thanks in advance.

It's been a mixed bag so far, anon, but not without some good in it. And back atcha.

This is a thing because of a horrible, deeply stupid domino cascade. What happened was, in 1962 Spider-Man was very fun to read and people liked that. Immediately after this we have our first problem, where people tried to identify what was making it so fun and correctly concluded that a key component was that Peter talked a lot during fights and the way he did it.

Peter's comedic timing in classic comics is very strong, delivered in a way where you're inclined to credit the character and not just the writer, and is honestly the most regular indicator that you're dealing with a character who's supposed to be very intelligent - he comes up with witty (and often very mean) things to say about almost every situation without any apparent expenditure of effort.

This was identified as quips, which is not exactly what I would call what Peter does. What Peter does is patter - keeping up a running commentary that lets him control the rhythm of a fight. Patter follows the rhythm of a scene, where a quip acts like a brake interrupting a scene's momentum.

So far, this does not sound like a meaningful hill to die on. And it isn't. This is a nearly nonexistent bit of semantic fuzziness.

AND YET.

So now it's been like forty years and Spider-Man has a deserved reputation as an amusing character. Awareness of this has spread way beyond the field of people who actually have any reason or inclination to understand the finer ins and outs of Peter Parker's very distinct character voice. Everyone knows that what Spider-Man does is, he quips! That means he tells jokes! This is technically true, but paints an inaccurate image of Peter as someone who interrupts fights to make puns, fascinated by his own wiseassery to the point of distraction like a bird with a shiny object. This is now what the general public thinks he is like. This filters back from the general public into comics. I do not at this time know what specific releases you can point at to blame for this, but Marvel's (comic branch's) grip on Peter's voice started to get just a liiiiittle slippery here and there every once in a while in the mid-90's, as they expanded Spider-Man unsustainably beyond their three core titles, and One More Day (in 2007) basically put it in the ground.

Meanwhile, the MCU starts in 2008 with Iron Man, capturing the hearts of millions. They start building up their brand. The conviction that quips - actual quips - are key is cemented by Avengers in 2012, because everybody is besotted with the abrupt, self-fascinated, oddball way the MCU's interpretation of Tony Stark talks. As well as being amusing, this is strong character work that tells you a lot about Tony - his brain runs very fast, like Peter's, but also he's bad at connecting to people, bad at treating them with consideration in a conversation to the point of debilitation, and extremely uncomfortable expressing or receiving expressions of direct, sincere emotions. He interrupts people. He makes jokes no matter how dire the situation is as a maladaptive coping mechanism. Because he knows he's a genius, he remains convinced that he's funny regardless of whether his audience agrees.

His out-of-universe audience definitely agreed, though, and here we begin to lose the plot, again. The quippy speaking style gets shoveled around more generously in Avengers, the movie directed by the Buffyspeak guy, and is received with strong audience approval, and after that it defines the voice of the MCU. Even when that means deflating serious moments with jokes to the detriment of your film. This filters back down to the comics.

So now you've got this entire quip dimension, and an entire line of comics variably mimicking or sending up its style. And then you have Spider-Man, who everyone knows is The Quip Guy. Surely something about his quips sets him apart from everyone else quipping, since he has that reputation? No one can write this convincingly because it is not a real thing.

So that's how you get team titles that are just endless series of quips, with scenes where Spider-Man shows up to make a quip of the exact same tone and quality and then everyone around him suddenly acts like they have never heard a quip in their life, and also hate jokes and being funny. Because something has to be different about his joke style, right? It must be that there's too much of it, which is annoying? Time and place, Peter! Ha ha.

And I look at MCU Spider-Man, a character advertised as being funny because everyone knows Spider-Man is funny, who has been set up to stand out in a universe entirely populated by wiseasses who quip constantly by being written to deliver jokes with absolutely no intention behind them whatsoever, because he is stupid, because he is a teenager and clearly teens are innately stupid, and that's the joke. And I am inclined to agree: It's extremely fucking annoying.

#periodically i see jewish fans dish critique along the lines of 'they made his humor style less jewish' and i'm inclined to agree.#spiderman #peter parker #tony stark #spiderman meta #marvel #spidey #MCU #mcu negative #asks answered #anonymous #essays #spider-man

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allnewalldifferentwildspider · 3 years

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Zuko & Katara's Relationship Dynamic

This is like the third or fourth time I've tried to write up this post so please bare with me.

Oh wow. That video. Hopefully everyone has seen it now. Not only did it articulate arguments I've been making for years, but it also brought up ideas I had never thought of or noticed before. Watching that and watching the second half of Book 3 again (because it's my favorite) made me want to redo my zutara dynamic post.

I'm going to be using the tiny bits and pieces the show gave us to see how Zuko and Katara's relationship looks and how it would look if they gave us more because...Bryke really fucking hated zutara. I mean, I guess they did.

Katara is compassionate; Zuko is empathetic

A lot of anti-zutara arguments have said that Zuko and Katara could never be together because they would constantly fight and hate each other and it end sooner than later. Not only does this actually describe maiko, but that argument would need to ignore the characters' actual character.

One of Katara's biggest character traits is how compassionate she is. She has a drive to help others and ease their pain. Whether it's getting Aang out of the iceberg or healing a Fire Nation fishing village, Katara will go out of her way to help someone in need.

Katara: No. I will never ever turn my back on people who need me.

Zuko is very emotional and passionate person. As much as he tried to hide it to appease his father, Zuko does want to open up and connect with people. Unfortunately, aside from his uncle, most of the other people he knows are like Zhao and Azula. Not the most understanding of crowds. But because of this he can pick up what people are really thinking and feeling. Think of it as a defense mechanism he developed growing up around people like Azula.

Get these two kinds of people together and you get the crystal catacombs scene. Katara lashes out at Zuko until she breaks down. When she does Zuko opens up with empathy since they have something in common. This creates the beginning of an understanding between the two. Zuko uses that to finally open up to someone who isn't his uncle and Katara listens and reaches out to help. Contrast to the first episode of Book 3 when Zuko tries to voice his thoughts and concerns to Mai and she...doesn't really care.

Something similar happens during The Southern Raiders. Zuko figures out that Katara is taking out her anger of being separated from her father by The Fire Nation onto him and even connecting her mother's death to him.

It's not the first time Zuko has done this either. He easily figured out that Sokka was planning on going to The Boiling Rock. He does it again during Sozin's Comet when he tells Katara that Aang needs to figure out what to do about Ozai by himself.

There's a noticeable pattern of behavior by the time Sozin's Comet arrives. Zuko voices his concerns about meeting his uncle again and Katara is right there to help him through it.

Zuko's empathy combined with Katara's compassion creates almost a cycle of understanding and emotional vulnerability that the two can't really get with anyone else. One notices the other having concerns or problems and goes to give comfort by words or by actions.

Zuko still has a temper but so does Katara

Even after Zuko's fever dream character change thing, even after The Day of Black Sun, he still has it in him to yell at anyone who commits even the slightest transgressions against him:

Aang: That one felt kinda hot. Zuko: Don't patronize me. You know what it's supposed to look like. Aang: Sorry, sifu hotman. Zuko: And stop calling me that!

Sokka: So all we have to do is make Zuko angry. Easy enough. *pokes him with his sword* *annoying laugh* Zuko: All right! Cut it out!

Maybe it's the firebender in him or maybe he really is just like that. Basically if you annoy him, he'll let you know. What people sometimes overlook is that while it takes Katara a bit longer, she also gets worked up when people upset her.

Toph: What's the matter? Can't handle some dirt, Madame Fussy Britches? Katara: Oh, sorry, did I splash you, mud slug?

And remember, it was Katara getting angry at Sokka that even broke the iceberg that revealed Aang.

Katara: Ugh, I'm embarrassed to be related to you! Ever since Mom died I've been doing all the work around camp while you've been off playing soldier! Sokka: Uh... Katara? Katara: I even wash all the clothes! Have you ever smelled your dirty socks? Let me tell you, NOT PLEASANT! Sokka: Katara! Settle down! Katara: No, that's it. I'm done helping you. From now on, you're on your own!

The point is that it is both Zuko and Katara that are very passionate and emotional people. One of them isn't emotionally dominating the other because they both wear their emotions on their sleeves.

This also comes in to play when they set goals for themselves. When Zuko sets a goal, he puts everything into it. Katara is the same way. The difference is that Zuko's drive sometimes gives him a one-track mind while Katara is more flexible. Like for example Zuko being so focused on finding Aang before Sozin's Comet that he ignores Toph's story about her childhood versus Katara wanting to go to the North Pole but taking time to stop and help whoever they come across.

This passion also fuels their values and how strongly they stand by their beliefs. I already put The Painted Lady quote up above but Zuko's morality is what is making him so angry at himself during The Beach. He knows what he did was wrong, but he couldn't face it yet.

Sometimes their emotions get the better of them, but it's only because they are passionate about what they're doing.

Their natural teamwork is amazing

I can't provide a lot of clues in this bit because it's more of a visual thing. Just consider how flawlessly their plans worked during their attack on The Southern Raiders. Especially when you consider that it was a stealth mission so they barely even said anything to each other during and it still went incredibly well.

You could see it again during their mock battle with The Melon Lord. Sokka must have noticed because he paired them together to deliver some "liquidy-hot offence." And they pulled it off, again, without having to say anything.

They've only been a team for a few weeks(?), days(?) but they act as if they've been doing it for years.

They trust each other's judgment

Piggybacking of the previous point, Zuko and Katara have only been a team for a while but there seems to be a level of understanding in terms of judgement. They both know that whatever the other chooses is going to be a well-thought out decision. Maybe it's because they see each other as the mature members of the group even though Sokka is the same age as Zuko? I don't know.

Aang disappears right before they embark on their fight against the Fire Lord, and out of nowhere, Katara puts Zuko in charge.

Zuko: Get out of the bison's mouth, Sokka. We have a real problem here. Aang is nowhere to be found and the comet is only two days away. Katara: What should we do Zuko? Zuko: I don't know. Why are you all looking at me? Katara: Well, you are kind of the expert on tracking Aang.

and that wasn't the first time in that episode that she went along with one of Zuko's decisions

Katara: Aang, don't walk away from this. *She begins to walk towards him as a hand touches her shoulder to stop her from doing so.* Zuko: Let him go. He needs time to sort it out by himself.

As a lot of people have pointed out during the entirety of The Southern Raiders, Zuko never gives a suggestion on what he thinks Katara should do. Aside from making it a stealth mission, he follows her lead the entire way.

Katara teases Zuko (and he lets her)

The fun one. This one has two parts: pre and post The Southern Raiders.

Before The Southern Raiders, Katara was tolerating Zuko. She was still angry with him about the betrayal at Ba Sing Se. Getting little jabs at him was the only thing that was really helping her from loosing her cool around him.

Katara: I'm sorry. I'm just laughing at the irony. You know... how it would have been nice for us if you lost your firebending a long time ago? Zuko: Well it's not lost. It's just weaker for some reason. Katara: Maybe you're just not as good as you think you are. Toph: Ouch.

He just finished yelling at Aang and Sokka but all he does is glare at Katara. She does it again, but to be fair, he kind of set himself up for it.

Zuko: It's a sacred form that happens to be thousands of years old! Katara: Oh yeah? What's your little form called? Zuko: ...The Dancing Dragon.

Then comes post The Southern Raiders and...yeah, she's still picking on him and he still lets her. Granted it's a lot more playful this time around.

Zuko: They make me totally stiff and humorless. Katara: Actually, I think that actor's pretty spot on. Zuko: How could you say that? Actor Uncle: Let's forget about the Avatar and get massages. Actor Zuko: How could you say that?! (Cut back to Katara wearing a satisfied grin on her face and she looks to an expressionless Zuko as he slouches in his seat.)

I love pointing it out every time. She teases him and he does nothing about it.

Katara: Er, no. I was looking for cooking pots in the attic and I found this. Look at baby Zuko! Isn't he cute? Oh lighten up, I was just teasing.

And she admits it!

So what can we take away from this? From what little time they were given together (thanks, Bryke) it seems that Zuko and Katara really understand each other on an intimate emotional level. They can sense when the other is distressed and offer comfort. They're both passionate in and out of combat, for better or for worse. They're comfortable with each other as if they've known each other for years even though it's such a short time. Katara also likes to add a little bit of playfulness in there with Zuko letting her have her fun, again, showing how comfortable they are with each other.

I do think their relationship could have gone to romantic sooner than later if you would have given it a bit more time. Like first half of a hypothetical Book 4.

To me, at least.

#zutara #zuko #katara #anti kataang #anti bryke

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nagisasstunningpersonality · 3 years

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Retranslation and Analysis of That Fight Scene

So firstly, I just want to say the subs are not bad and convey the general meaning very well, in a way that sounds natural in English. That being said, there's always some things that get lost in literal translation, and I really want to demonstrate how much depth the Japanese in this scene actually has for Karma and Nagisa's characters.

Basically the TLDR point here is that this fight is very much not about Korosensei. This is completely platonic, I promise I resisted making any shippy points.

Karma: Hey, Nagisa kun, aren't you getting extremely carried away?

Nagisa: Eh? (definitely surprised and bewildered)

Karma: The number one strongest assassin in Class E is Nagisa kun, isn't it? (uses yo here, which suggests confidence in the statement). Are you (very directly yourself, your own thoughts) wanting to quit assassination? Let's think about the talentless others who are desperately trying their hardest to kill him. When you put it like that, it's like a woman who 'has it' telling the ugly ones that they should honestly quit being so desperate to get a boyfriend, that kind of feeling?"

So some interesting analysis here is that Karma says "zuibun", or extremely, when the original translation is "a tad". The translation feels more natural in English, however it kind of makes me feel that Karma's trying to make more of a point. Nagisa has the right to be making suggestions and stepping up, but he's gone so far this time it's crossed a line.

I think 才能がないなり (talentless, saino ga nai nari) is also very interesting. Talent is the best translation, but if you look at the kanji very literally, there's "genius" and "ability". This specific word choice more implies that the other assassins are good, but Nagisa's just another level. Japanese grammar is confusing at best, but essentially 'nari' means become. So you take this as kind of like 'students who couldn't develop genius ability'.

The repetition of 'desperate' is also pretty interesting, linking the examples together better. It emphasises the point that they're kind of at a loss with. He also doesn't directly say attractive woman, he says "motteiru onna", which essentially means the same, but is literally "a woman who has (no object given but essentially 'it'). This more directly reflects to what he's saying about Nagisa, he HAS talent, this unspecified natural quality that makes him better than everyone else without trying.

There's also a lot more rhetorical questions in the Japanese, which got combined into single sentences in the English. The "let's think" thing is very literally what he says, like he's wanting Nagisa to actually consider his thoughts for himself.

Nagisa's original argument and intention may have been about Korosensei. Karma may be genuinely opposed to saving Korosensei. But that isn't the point of Karma's argument at all, he's making this about Nagisa because he's reached a limit with the both of them.

In order to spare you, more under the cut.

Nagisa: T-the aim wasn't... Above all, for assassination, your understanding is always better than mine

Karma: Saying that directly (take with slight pinch of salt - he could have also said "fixing your statement") is irritating. In reality, isn't it that you yourself are the most powerful, and you can't comprehend the feelings of weak humans?

Nagisa: That's wrong (also using affirmative yo here)! That's not what I said! These are my true feelings! Do you hate Korosensei? We went to see a movie together with him, didn't we have a variety of great times?!"

Karma: That's why, that octopus did his best to come and make a fun classroom every time, and didn't give up like Nagisa. Without bloodlust, this classroom wouldn't have been built. Can't you understand the effort?! It's not just your body, are you still a fresh elementary school student?

One thing to note here is that Nagisa isn't actually finishing his sentences. You can absolutely tell what he means because Japanese makes sense like that, but he's still dropping words. Or when he does say a full sentence, they're very short statements. He is desperate here, trying to prove a point he can't actually voice into words correctly.

The context here is that this is before we know their full backstory. Nagisa admired Karma, and he can't quite say it right yet. He thinks they're on different stages still, and Karma is frustrated because Nagisa doesn't see the point.

Karma, after all, does have this inhuman image of Nagisa in his head from years ago. The image of Nagisa looking like some kind of snake demon as he kills Karma in his sleep. He genuinely still, here, believes that Nagisa is purposely hiding this. That's why he keeps putting words into Nagisa's mouth. He's also cutting him off at points, not listening at all to what he's truly saying.

At the same time, Karma starts talking down to him. Instead of saying 'no' (how you'd end a sentence to a friend), he starts using 'kai', which is condescending and how you'd speak to a child. There's an argument here to be made for Karma doing this as a kind of defence mechanism too, but that's very complicated. At this point he really is just trying to get to him.

They are not arguing about killing Korosensei, not at all.

Karma: Huh?

Nagisa: *does the creepy eye thing*

Karma: Eh? What are those eyes? You with the social standing of a tiny female animal, are you defying a human?

Nagisa: I was just...

Karma: If you have a complaint, how about saying it after you win a fight for once? It's aimed at me, so come on. C'mon. C'mon. C'mon!

This is actually one of the most significant changes to the original.

This is the thing, Karma was never calling Nagisa a tiny mouse of whatever, he was just comparing him to one. Because he knows very clearly that Nagisa isn't like that. He sees that look in his eyes and it prompts him, in his frustration, to finally try and bring it out of Nagisa. He's trying to prove a point.

But then Nagisa stops himself. He lets go of his bloodlust for a moment, defaulting to Nagisa as we know and love him, literally turning his head away from Karma.

But Karma's too far gone at this point, he's dragged stuff up his past feelings about Nagisa, the ones he's been hiding for a year to be tentative friends with him, and now he can't let them go. He needs to see Nagisa's darker side plainly, no matter what that means.

It's also important that he says "it's aimed at me". I think this is a little deeper than literal. I think what he's implying here is this entire thing is somehow aimed at him, like Nagisa's trying to strip everything away just for his own perspective.

Obviously at this point Nagisa snaps and chokes him.

Nagisa internal thoughts: Even I...

Nagisa: I'm not going with half my feelings!

Karma: This guy...

This is also pretty significant. I'm surprised they cut the "even I" part because that says a lot about Nagisa's current feelings. He still doubts himself. He's aware that he's a pacifist, that he's got a lesser social standing, but Karma's put him into a position where he has to stand up for himself. And this is important to him.

Karma smiles when he says "this guy", getting ready to punch him. He feels like he's succeeded, in a way. Though at first he looked genuinely surprised Nagisa actually did it. There's a certain kind of satisfaction that finally he managed to bring Nagisa's 'true' self out.

Obviously at this point they get separated.

So what does all of this actually tell us? Well, pretty clearly here, this is just Karma's issues coming to light. But also a very helpful and useful moment for Nagisa's development as a character. Whether we agree with Karma using him as a punching bag or not, it genuinely does force Nagisa to get some self agency for once.

Karma and Nagisa will never be characters who sit around and talk honestly about their feelings. But even if they're using a whole situation to mask the fact that they very much are discussing their relationship here, it is still a significant moment where pretty much all the barriers they've been putting up against each other drop. They're just still not entirely on the same page through this scene.

Nagisa thinks Karma is just looking down on him and trying to pick a fight. He's baffled and confused as to why Karma feels so strongly against him.

Karma, on the other hand, thinks Nagisa is better than them all and is frustrated when he 'purposely' acts like he isn't. Karma still feels lied to from when they were kids. And he wants to expose it all, to get Nagisa to understand the position his skill puts him in. I honestly don't think Karma ever thought Nagisa was less than him at all, he just knew it would be an easy way to get a reaction. See how he flips tactic from "you're the best here" to "you're a tiny animal" when Nagisa just went into denial the first time?

I'm not going to go into the whole of their actual full fight, but there's some interesting points that reflect back on all of this.

Korosensei saying "your own answer is right in front of you", basically demonstrating that this entire thing really is just Karma and Nagisa

The entire point of the fight was to get one hit in with a knife, but Karma decides to just continuously beat Nagisa instead. Which yeah, is pretty ineffective. Pretty much proves again that it wasn't about just taking a victory.

Karma took Nagisa's hits on purpose, maybe it can be argued that this is trying to make things last longer, to get Nagisa to actually work for it.

Nagisa demands that he listens to what he has to say. And that's right, because Karma was cutting him off originally.

Karma is a super strategist right? And he was genuinely shocked that Nagisa didn't use his bloodlust to take him down. This is Karma. Sure, he's allowed to make mistakes. But this is odd for him. He was so caught up in his own perspective of Nagisa just having that skill that unfairly made him better. But Nagisa literally throws that skill out and beats Karma on his own level, pretty much disproving him. Maybe Nagisa has this special ability, but he's also worked just as hard as everyone else. He's trained to know what assassination means.

Beating Karma like this, on a 'human' level, was pretty much it. Karma stopped fighting back when he realised that, because he was disproven, and pretty much every wall he put up against Nagisa got literally choked out of him. Karma is already known as kind of an ass and a dirty fighter, you really think he'd worry about the others not accepting it if he stabbed Nagisa fair and square? If he cared that much about killing Korosensei, he would have just done it.

Their fight was never about Korosensei.

#assassination classroom #ansatsu kyoushitsu #ass class #karmagisa

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itsclydebitches · 3 years

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A weird defence I've seen of RWBY's conflicts has been that it's good writing simply by the virtue that people can disagree on what's the right thing to do in said conflict. Which doesn't work when one decision is being presented as the only valid choice while every other option is either not addressed or demonized. This isn't a story leaving a nuanced set of stances to explore, it's a guy on stage signalling the crowd to boo whenever someone goes against the Protag's decision.

Real quick, I want to talk about RWBY by not talking about RWBY. I’ve seen this argument a lot too and the tl;dr is that just because your audience debates the right action in a conflict — something that is inevitable given how subjective media is — doesn’t mean the story encouraged that reflection in any way. As you say, RWBY pretends that those disagreements don’t exist and that This Is The One (1) Right Answer... which entirely defeats the purpose of a morally nuanced situation in the first place. That lack is bad writing because it demonstrates the author’s inability to provide an accurate picture of the conflict while still ensuring we come out of it liking the parties involved. The conflict was too complex for them to manage alongside equally complex characterization, so they just pretended it was far simpler than it actually was. That’s not something to praise.

But to get to the not RWBY part. I’ve mentioned this a couple times before, but one of the scenes that I think manages these sorts of conflicts really well is the funeral fight in The Haunting of Hill House, episodes 6, “Two Storms.” So warning from here on out for spoilers. Sometimes, the best way to see what’s not working well in one show is to look at another show that does (basically) the same thing successfully and compare the two.

Normally I’d include screenshots, but Netflix doesn’t allow that :/ So I’m forced to rely on bullet points.

The basic premise is that the Crain family has assembled in daughter Shirley’s funeral home, the night before they bury their sister, Nell. A lot of secrets are about to come to light.

The scene kicks off when their father, Hugh, relays the call he got from the housekeeper the night of Nell’s death. She had committed suicide in the family’s childhood home.

Though everyone knew how she’d died, son Steven is distraught at hearing the details and reveals that a few weeks prior Nell crashed a book signing of his. This shocks the others given that this was very unusual behavior for Nell.

Shirley likewise reveals that she got a call from Nell who’d been worried about their brother, Luke, but hadn’t spoken to her the night of her death. The implication is that no one did. They’ll never know what was going through her head the night she died.

Hugh reveals that she did call him. “I talked to her.”

Stunned by this news, his children demand to know what was discussed and Hugh is clearly reluctant to continue. However, he eventually says that Nell wasn’t just worried about Luke, but also the “Bent Neck Lady,” a specter from her childhood.

The viewer knows that ghosts are real in this show. The kids don’t. Or rather, they all experienced supernatural occurrences in their childhood, are still experiencing them now, but only some of them are willing to admit they’re real. Steven is the diehard skeptic of the bunch and starts yelling at his father, accusing him of aiding Nell’s delusions and ignoring a family history of mental illness. In particular, he declares that this “makes you culpable [in her death].”

Steven continues to accuse Hugh of “holding back information” about Nell and Hugh shoots back that “If I held back anything it was to protect you kids.” The viewer understands Hugh’s dilemma: the only reason he keeps things to himself is because Steven and the others refuse to believe the truth, with an added dose of this supernatural stuff being very dangerous. Steven asks, “Why do I need protection from the truth?”

Before their fight can go any further, Shirley tells Steven, “You might want to check yourself before you start talking about the truth.” He published an autobiographical book about their childhood trauma and notably capitalized on a supernatural angle he doesn’t believe in. Shirley calls it “blood money.”

As the argument about the ethics of his book rages, Shirley defends herself primarily with how everyone else thinks this is “blood money” too. No one took a cut when Steven offered one, proving how despicable they all think it is.

Meanwhile, sister Theo has been getting heat for being drunk (a coping mechanism for her own supernatural troubles) and Shirley eventually pushes her far enough that she admits she did take Steven’s money and used it to get her degree. “It’s good, fucking money.” Suddenly, Steven has someone in his corner and Shirley’s main defense has crumbled.

Shirley is furious that Theo had this secret income but was still living with her and her husband. Theo reminds her that she offered to pay rent, but Shirley isn’t interested in hearing that. She demands that Theo move out immediately and uses this betrayal as the new way to protect herself. She’s the victim here.

Steven, sensing another secret in the works, cautions Shirley to “get off your high horse before you fall off.”

Shirley maintains her position until her husband blurts that they also took Steven’s money. Shirley hasn’t been running the funeral home well and they would have sunk without it.

Despite being the punching bag for the second half of this fight, Shirley is offered both reassurance and dignity. Her husband emphasizes that the only reason they’re struggling is because Shirley is a good person. She does too much work pro bono. Shirley also delivers the line, “Do you have any idea how much you’ve humiliated me?” calling into question the husband’s choice to admit this now, purely as a way to prove her wrong.

Shirley leaves to get some distance and discovers that someone — something — has put buttons over Nell’s eyes. The shock of this keeps the fight from continuing and, as plot intervenes, gives the characters the space needed to eventually start healing and forgiving one another, notably by sitting with the various truths they all now have to grapple with.

Phew! A long summary, but I’ve put this much detail in to highlight the nuance of the scene. Obviously RWBY would differ in many ways — less cursing, for one — but the core elements of any morally complex scene should be the same. The important takeaways here are that no one in the Crain family are “pure” or “evil” and everyone gets their chance to be both right and wrong. Hugh is right that Steven won’t listen to him and wrong in that he didn’t do enough to help his kids. We get Steven and Hugh’s frustration, their understanding of the world at odds with one another. Steven is wrong to put everything on his father and justified in starting his writing career with their story. We watch the scene move from “Steven is Wrong and everyone agrees” to “Oh shit nm, more and more of the family are revealing that they benefited from his money, complicating how “wrong” he actually is.” Shirley is right to point out that Theo is getting drunk during their sister’s funeral and Theo is right to point out that being drunk doesn’t erase having a good point. Theo is allowed to scream at the group and then immediately be offered help when she falls. Shirley pretends she’s better than all of them and is slowly, horrifyingly proven wrong, but is then still extended compassion and is allowed to point out how horribly they’ve just treated her. The husband is right about the money, wrong about keeping it a secret/revealing it the way he did, right in how he tries to diffuse the other fights, and VERY wrong by getting caught kissing Theo down in the storeroom!

The scene twists and turns in a way that highlights everyone’s points and their flaws, the moments when their perspective should be upheld and questioned. The end result is a scene that has space for the audience to debate everyone’s choices without imposing the single view of This Person Is Obviously Wrong/Right and If You Think Otherwise You’re Not Watching The Show Correctly. The show itself acknowledges the complexity and nuance of these problems. It asks, “Hugh should have tried harder, but what more can he do when his kids literally don’t believe this stuff exists? Was Steven really justified in writing a book about their collective experiences? What does it mean that something his family sees as capitalizing on their trauma also helped them keep businesses and schooling afloat? Was it okay for Shirley’s husband to keep that money a secret, even if it helped them? How might he have told her in a less cruel manner? What about Shirley’s life has led to her intense need to be on that ‘high horse’?”

And of course: “Who is really responsible for Nell’s death?” By this point the viewer already knows that there is no “really” here. This is too complicated a tragedy to lay the blame at any one person’s feet. Everyone in this room has moments of justified accusations and moments of chastisement because they’re well written, well rounded characters who are neither saints nor devils. The length of the scene (done in a single shot!) emphasizes that if you just wait long enough, even the most perfect looking person will eventually have a skeleton pulled from their closet. No one is above mistakes.

RWBY has NONE of that. Zip. Nada. Nothing. RWBY gave us a scenario with many of the same, core themes — secret keeping, secrets unwillingly revealed, blaming others for your mistakes, hurtful actions with helpful consequences, questioning who is responsible for a tragic death — and instead of even attempting to give us some of the above nuance, RWBY said only that Ruby was right, Ozpin was wrong, and demanding that the audience ignore the nuance they could already see in order to accept the canon.

RWBY’s scene asks the audience to play dumb and look at the world as a Black and White place, despite the show simultaneously insisting that “the world isn’t a fairy tale” and is, in fact, filled with shades of gray.

Just not any shades of gray that mess with that dichotomy that now drives the story.

That’s not good writing. It’s oblivious and contradictory writing that makes the audience frustrated. Not satisfied, surprised, contemplative, or curious. Just frustrated.

#rwby #the haunting of hill house #mymetas #Anonymous

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sparklinpixiedust · 3 years

Text

Basic Training

This post has been sitting in my drafts for months now, during which I've come up with a few ways I wanted to write this post. This is what I've come up with.

Basic Training is the episode which made me hate Ben the most. The whole episode consisted him of being a stuck up brat only to be rewarded for it in the end.

This episode was the perfect opportunity to have Kevin in the spotlight and show how skilled and smart he is.

Gwen's presence in this episode was actually fine, there's no change needed for that.

Look, I know the shows named Ben 10 but we have seen Ben be the hero tons of times already.

And Ben being egoistic about his heroism is not something new in the franchise.

There have been episodes on the OS where Ben got a big head, yet I dont ever see anyone complaining about that.

Was is it because he was 10 that we excuse this behaviour? Nope.

15 - 16 is still pretty young and his attitude can be excused at this age as well.

My opinion? It was handled better in the OS.

There were times when Ben wasn't always the main focus.

In Lucky Girl, Ben has his ' who's your hero?' Moment.

They showed Gwen feeling jealous and hurt by the fact she wasn't noticed much.

It was realistic.

Then the epsiode proceeded to focus on Gwen , having Ben being kind of like a sub plot to the story.

Towards the end Ben compliments her.

So yeah Ben got big head, but at the same time they shifted focus so that the audience wouldn't find it annoying.

Gwen was in the spotlight for a bit, giving people a break from Ben.

Secondly , in Be Afraid Of The Dark, Ben again is shown to be slightly stuck up, but towards the end of that episode he learns and acknowledges Gwen and Grandpa for help and understands his crime fighting is more of a team effort.

In Galactic Enforcers, we are shown there are other heros besides Ben as well.

Ben wasn't the sole focus of that episode. Yes it was about him but also about the Galactic Enforcers.

I don't think he was shown to be over confident here , but it was nice to see some other heros in the scene.

The Ben 10,000 episode focuses on how Ben was too focused on his job and the lesson at that was Ben needed to relax and have them Galactic Enforcers take the lead instead.

Again , his attitude towards everything was brought in focus but towards the end he learnt something.

I recently started watching Generator Rex and I can't help but compare Rex's character to Ben's.

Rex is also proud , rushes into things and considers himself to be a hotshot. But they also show him being down ,having trouble with his nanites and actually voice out his insecurities.

He's still the hero, still has things go his way most times but it's not annoying like Ben.

( I've only seen like 7 episodes so far so I don't know if this going to go down hil or not but so far so good)

The issue with the sequels after the OS was that Ben was the focus a bit too much.

We as the audience were rarely ever given a break from him.

Other than a few conversations here and there about his attitude, nothing really was done about it.

Gwen should've been appreciated more for saving Kevin and Kevin should've been appreciated for stopping Aggregor.

But they weren't.

If it had been Ben , they would've made sure to show him getting some sort of recognition or trophy.

Back to the Basic Training episode.

We know he's the legendary Ben Tennyson, we know he's a hero. We didn't need another episode on it.

Instead the plot should've focused on Kevin. His skills, his abilities.

Ben would act the same but Magsiter Hulka should've put some sort of cover so Ben couldn't use the omnitrix.

Ben goes on breaking rules, and having a hard time being a hero without the watch.

Towards the end, it should've been Kevin who cracks the case and saves Hulka. Ben is mad he can't use the omnitrix but instead uses the guns and other weapons he's learnt to use at the academy

He's not amazing at them , but it makes him realise that he is hero , watch or not, something that has been emphasised in the show. Its not impossible for him to function without the watch.

Towards the end, Ben getting a 95 was a stretch. I'm sorry , but the guy wasn't great with using weapons and without the watch I dont think he would've been able to complete that hostage excercise.

I'm thinking more like 89%.

Gwen gets 98, that's fine and Kevin gets a 100.

Hulka comes in and awards the medal (?) to Kevin, suggesting he's becoming more like his father.

( im ignoring the ret con, plus the retcon I'm assuming wasnt thought off at this point by the writers)

Ben is shown to take one of the guns back to earth, because he thinks they're cool and he wants to practice and get better at them.

The whole hostage situation makes him want to get better at making strategies.

Yes he's good at improv, but he needs to learn to properly plan as well.

It doesn't matter if he's never shown to use the gun ever again, and he's back to relying on the omnitrix.

Or maybe some time down the line, he could use the weapon, even if it for a second, to show that he is improving and getting better.

Before you say 'he's already a hero, he doesn't need to learn anything ' sorry but no.

He's 16. He may have saved the world but he still has growing up to do. Different battles are going to arise all the time.

Saying he is perfect at 16 is dumb. Saying he's perfect when he's ben 10k , it'll make some sense. He's been around for a while and is pretty experienced.

The watch is a part of him, but seeing him try to explore other options would've been a fresher idea.

Another scene that made me mad was the court (?) scene in Vreedle, Vreedle.

Ben being a hero shouldn't make him above the law.

Domstol ruling in favor of Ben just because he's the legendry Ben Tennyson was stupid.

After Ben's little monologue , and destroying Domstols desk, the judge should've just informed him that being a hero does not excuse him from following the law.

Kevin could've had his little moment doing some negotiation ( would've been nice to see how he works as con artist) and Ben could've jumped in and helped while making some good points for the argument, showing us he's not stupid.

Then having Domstol rule in their favor would've made sense.

On the way back to earth there could've been a joke about how Ben watches Judge Judy too much which is where he learnt about trials and stuff. Or maybe Gwens dad taught him a thing or two at some point.

All this doesn't mess with Ben's character all that much, he's still the hero of the show, he still has his ego but it makes him more likeable, shifts focus from his attitude, and shows us he's pretty smart and is growing into a good hero.

Ben's not a bad guy. I mean he is the hero of the show. There are tons of scenes which show he's good , like the whole sacrificing thing so the ultimates could live and all.

But little scenes here and there tend to be enough for someone , especially for someone who isn't a super hard-core Ben lover to form negative opinions on him.

Although calling him a psychopath / narc is out of line because I don't find him to be like that. His attitude was magnified by him being in the spotlight too much and writers not having a good balance in writing situations.

Ben being the main character of the show is at risk of becoming hated or less appreciated just because he's the font runner of the show.

Admit it, side characters tend to get more love most times than the main agonist of shows.

I've been watching videos on YouTube on this topic as to why this happens , and what I've come up with is that writers of shows tend to focus too much on main character. Things seem to go their way most times and this tends to get on peoples nerves, consciously or subconsciously because it's not exactly realistic.

Having shows where everything focuses on one person most times tend to backfire.

I don't mind Ben having a big head, I dont mind him making jokes and being so casual.

It's his defense mechanism to protect himself from drowning into the struggles and pressures of being a hero. But always having him be that way isn't good.

The writers should've executed it properly.

( okay this post got really long, more than I thought it would. If you're read the whole things , congratulations on making it here lol.

I'm not going to stop anyone from replying to this because everyone has different opinions and we all have the freedom to express them.

Although I believe I've made my point and I've made sure to keep in mind all the arguments about why bashing Ben is wrong when he's not a bad guy while typing this out.

I don't think I've directed any major hate towards him , its mostly towards the writers for making the situations like that,but if you think I have you can reply to it.

I'm not gonna reply back though , because again I feel I've made my point.

Any agreements / disagreements you have with the post feel free to share because it is your right.

Any disagreements you have with other members, as long as its related to the post you can share it.

Any issues you have personally with other members, please keep them to your selves.

I will not tolerate bullying , harassing, name calling and petty arguments on my post and blog page.

If this happens I will simply delete this post and re-upload it.)

#ben 10 au #ben 10 #kevin levin #ben 10 alien force #ben tennyson #ben 10 reboot #ben 10 omniverse #ben 10 analysis #ben 10 series #ben 10 critical #ben 10 classic #my take

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houseofsannae · 2 years

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10 for Make My Wish Come True

(I'm curious how you even thought of that galaxy brain idea of a rarepair)

10: Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story?

Ha, okay, storytime. The pairing in question is Naminé/Oerba Dia Vanille, for the curious.

Our tale starts not with Make My Wish Come True, but with Kairi and Lea's Excellent Adventure. I was doing a worldhopping fic, and shoved all my favourite Disney movies in just because I was positive that none of them would ever get any respect into a Kingdom Hearts game. In fact, that was the main criteria I was using for world choices: "I don't think this is ever going to be in a KH game".

And, well, what could be more "will never appear in Kingdom Hearts" than the actual world from a Final Fantasy game?

Particularly Final Fantasy XIII, the only Final Fantasy game not currently available on PS4 (@Square). Final Fantasy XIII, whose 10th anniversary passed without so much as a peep (@Square). Final Fantasy XIII, whose 13 anniversary this year would be an amazing time to do literally anything for it (@SQUARE).

*Ahem*

Final Fantasy XIII, at the time my favourite of the ones I'd played (1, 2, 13, 13-2, 3), and currently my favourite of the ones I've played (All of the single-player mainline titles, and Type-0). Sure, the Final Fantasy characters are supposed to be from the Destiny Islands, Twilight Town, or Radiant Garden, but I figured out a way around that. Which I'm not telling you until we get to the point where it's relevant. :P

So FFXIII joined the ranks of worlds to be visited in KLEA. I knew I wanted Lightning to give Kairi and Lea some basic instruction in swordplay, which was the main reason for the visit, but I also figured, "hey, Naminé and Vanille are both at this point in time trying desperately to repress horrible feelings of guilt and depression so that the people that care about them don't notice they're suffering". So a conversation between the two of them made perfect sense.

It was while planning that out (read: "daydreaming at work") that I had the idle thought that Naminé should look at Vanille's legs.

Now, those of you who don't know FFXIII need to understand, Vanille's l'Cie brand (the mark that shows how much longer before she turns into a mindless monster) is on her upper thigh. There was a completely innocuous reason for Naminé to be looking at her legs. But my brain said "no, Naminé should also be looking because Vanille has very nice legs".

Of course, my initial thought was "okay brain less horny please" but the more I thought about it, the more I started to like the idea of putting them together. They are, for better or for worse, very similar characters (Square Enix has 5 characters and 2 plots, 3 plots if you count the plot of Star Wars), but they react in different ways; Naminé has her learned helplessness, and Vanille has aggressive denial of anything being wrong. Obviously, Vanille grows beyond her unhealthy coping mechanism as part of FFXIII's narrative, and Naminé would be growing past hers as KHΨ continued. There was just one, teensy, tiny problem.

At the end of FFXIII, Vanille ends up voluntarily trapped in crystal stasis for all eternity (actually just 987 years, but who's counting?). Not exactly a good basis for a relationship.

Which brings us back to Make My Wish Come True, in which Naminé and Vanille mutually admit there was romantic interest... but, given their circumstances (the aforementioned crystal stasis), also mutually agree that it's not going to work out. Because, sometimes, relationships don't work out.

There was a lot of processing going on behind the scenes of that fic.

Then again, fiction isn't reality and I have a plan. We'll make it to Tahiti, Arthur, just one more score! ...Or something like that :P

#ask prompt #naminille #thanks for asking!

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mistresseast · 3 years

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can you explain in more detail why you think the PT weren't good friends for akiren? i'm not asking out of hate or to start drama, i just never interpreted things that way and i'm genuinely curious. i don't think them being brainwashed by maruki makes them "bad friends", but i don't know if that's what you meant either. i'd love to read a proper explanation on this that isn't just people arguing in the notes of that post.

Hi! Yeah, I know the ~discourse~ climate is pretty touchy and not a good place to exchange ideas, so I’ll do my best to put my thoughts on this matter into words.

Settle in, bc this one is long.

I’ll start off by saying I don’t dislike the PT, nor do I think they’re bad people, and honestly I think they love Joker a lot! Ryuji calling Akira after his fake death and talking about how his ideas on what makes a hero have changed because of Akira genuinely makes me emotional, along with dozens of other scenes with the thieves! They’re good kids who could be really good friends to Akira but that’s not what’s shown in the game. I don’t think it’s controversial to say Akira’s relationships with all of his friends are transactional. That’s kind of the point, all of his confidants arise out of deals, give and take, and in the metanarrative of the game, that’s how it works. You as the player help these characters solve their problems, and through ranking their confidants up, you get access to more gameplay perks. So it’s pretty even!! But like,,Akira, the character, isn’t the player. There’s no in-story mechanic by which he can cash in friendship points for being-good-at-killing-things prizes. Yes, he uses those abilities to not die in the metaverse, but there is no literal, in-universe way to explain how hanging out with someone translates to [insert gameplay perk here]. So you have to look at what is physically happening in the story. Akira hangs out with the PT, stands there while they have drama with another irrelevant character, and then one way or another their problems get solved and they swear to be Akira’s blood brother or whatever. Akira is a crutch for these characters, and they say multiple times that they wouldn’t have been able to do what they did without him. So all of their shit gets handled and Akira gets?? Like actually gets?? What? Inquiries about his well-being? Offers to help him? Questions about his life, his interests? No,,,not really,, But he gets access to a super powerful persona!! Yay!!! Bc everyone knows he’s just a little shadow-killing machine, right? And even the relationships he does get something tangible (as in separate from the mechanics of the game) out of, like Kawakami’s, are built on the notion that if Akira stops providing for whatever reason, the relationship will end. So essentially, Akira is under the pressure of filling whatever role his friends need him in for however long at any time, and he’s been led to believe that if he stops or fails, he will stop receiving any reciprocal care and acceptance.

(And I know this is all gameplay stuff, I know it has to be like this to codify the complicated process of human relationships, I know all of that, I’m just trying to find a deeper layer bc that’s what I do.)

This whole thing comes into pretty clear focus for me during the third semester when you visit everyone in the false reality. Everyone is happy to see him, of course, but they’re clearly wrapped up in their own happiness. Which is understandable, again, I’m not saying the PT need to be attached to Akira to be good friends, but it all still feels off to me.

If they know Joker, then they’d know it’s weird that he just shows up and starts asking these pointed questions while they’re in the middle of something. All of their other interactions with him have been led by them. Yeah, Joker approaches them bc the player has decided to hang out with them, but the other character always chooses the activity and leads the discussion. Akira showing up out of nowhere and asking them to “remember” and “move on” and whatnot should be raising some major red flags. And it clearly does, since their memories do start to return, but they’re all too scared of losing their happiness that they nope out of the conversation as soon as possible, without stopping to consider why Joker might be trying to reach out to them like that. They’re his friends; they should know he wouldn’t just be trying to hurt them or make them unhappy. After all, their entire relationship with him up til that point has been exclusively about Joker trying to help them. This doesn’t make the PT bad people, running away is a totally natural reaction in that situation. They’re just kids, and their minds have been manipulated to a point, but it’s not like they don’t remember Joker or the way they’ve grown since meeting him. In fact many of them mention how much they’ve matured recently, but they never actually relate that back to Akira, despite him being the primary driving force behind most of their personal arcs, even though they definitely remember him. Translation vagueness or deliberate nod to the idea that the PT don’t actually credit Akira with all the hard work he did after their initial lip service? Hmmm. Anyway, their failure to recognize that Joker is struggling just demonstrates to me what was set up all throughout their confidant links, that their relationships are transactional and that they don’t necessarily consider Joker and his individual needs outside of what he provides for them. And when they no longer need him bc that hole has been filled, he simply doesn’t occupy the same place of importance in their lives.

Makoto’s flashback in particular stood out to me, bc it was from a moment where she was specifically talking about feeling like she finally found a place to belong with the Phantom Thieves (and by extension, with Joker), but then she desperately tries to brush it off. Obviously that sense of belonging wasn’t meaningful enough to her for her to want it back. And I’m not blaming her, of course, any teenager would choose to have their father back over being in a vigilante group lmao, I just thought it was telling that the devs decided to show us a scene that was originally meant to be heartwarming as an example of the harsh reality Makoto wants to forget. All of the flashbacks are from defining moments for the thieves, but that one specifically got me like *thinking emoji*

So his friends are hesitant, despite the fact that they must know something is wrong. It’s understandable, they all stand to lose a lot if someone messes with the status quo. I genuinely don’t think I would react any differently. But there is someone who reacts differently and against his own self-interest. It’s Goro, the one who has arguably the most to lose, who doesn’t turn away from Akira. He seeks Akira out and teams up with him to uncover what’s really going on, even though he has every reason to believe that prodding too deep will literally mean the end of his life. He forces Akira and himself to face the truth because he knows anything else would just be an insult to what they’ve suffered so far. He’s the only one who never flinches, and that, more than any of his friends’ come-to-jesusing (which Akira still has to initiate) is what Akira needs in that situation. For the first time (outside of the brief instances in the tutorial levels), we see a situation where Akira is actually the dependent one, the one who needs help, who needs support. And the only one who has ever provided that, unconditionally, without demanding anything in return, is Goro. I could go into how Goro’s confidant blows all of the others out of the water in terms of building both himself AND Akira as characters, but it’s been said already and by smarter people than me. But basically, despite competition being a core theme of their relationship, Goro is the only character who is portrayed as Akira’s equal. Their contests are all in the name of improving not just Goro, but Akira too. Goro is the only character who expresses an interest in Akira’s inner life and development, and as such he knows Akira better than anyone else. So when Maruki tries to trap them all in a gilded birdcage, Goro won’t stand for it and he knows Akira won’t stand for it either. That’s why he’s so betrayed if you choose to accept the dreamworld. You’re negating the basis of your entire relationship with him and going against your own principles. Out of every character in the game, the one who knows Akira best and refuses to abandon him even when that could mean his own death is Goro Akechi.

I want to reiterate: I do not hate or even dislike the PT!! And tbh I don’t really think they “abandoned” Akira. That post, imo, is supposed to be kind of hyperbolic. Unless it’s referring to how many of them literally sprint away when he comes to talk to them lol. I look at it more like a commentary on how thoughtlessly the PT act as soon as their wishes are granted. I know it’s set up linearly for story purposes, but isn’t it kind of sad how no one checks up on Akira in the week he’s going around talking to people? Especially after he’s been acting so comparatively weird? It’s not unusual that they might be caught up in other stuff, but while you’re going around and visiting everyone, you don’t get a single text or call from ANY of the thieves, for a whole week!! Goro even comments on it directly with his pointed little “I’m sure you’re just as close as you were before” comment. God, he’s such a bitch. Ultimately, the PT do get their acts together, and it’s partially out of the realization that Akira is struggling alone against something and needs their help, which I love and appreciate. I think they are good friends who want to support Akira, but they can’t understand him past the role they’ve placed him in, and until they do, they’ll never be able to be what he needs. Akira loves his friends and knows he can rely on them in most ways, but those relationships will always be dogged by the pervasive fear that he must constantly earn the right to have the relationship at all. What he needs MOST is someone he doesn’t have to perform for, and from what we see in the game, none of the thieves fit that bill. Except Goro.

I know this was long and rambly and probably pretty disjointed but I wanted to be as thorough as possible and all of my thoughts just sort of gushed out. Obviously ymmv about all of this depending on how you interpret the game, but this is what I arrived at thanks to my analysis so this is what I have for you! Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk

#ask tag #anon #this is not an invitation for argument or discourse #i simply wanted to provide my interpretation of things #rude and probing questions will be deleted :)

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bearpillowmonster · 3 years

Text

FF6 Review (Overall)

I'm going to rate similar to the way I did FF7 Remake, but in only 2 parts, so there will be an overall review then a separate deep dive into the characters.

I played this game using an emulator and I'm not ashamed of it because I used the FF6 Relocalization project which I'll link

Basically nerd talk and explanation of what that means: It's basically a retranslation of the original SNES script using the GBA port as a base and mixing and matching some of the best parts so there you go. They have a way to mod the PC version to have the OG sprite work because sheesh is that thing ugly and they also have a way to resprite and resound the GBA version but this is the easiest and logical solution to get the best of all worlds. There's also "Anthology" which is the PS1 port that adds some CG custscenes which I just watched off of YouTube because it's only a few of the major scenes.

Anyways, yeah, I'm glad I emulated it especially because of the fast forward function. That first chunk would've been rough without it because you're left just waiting for one of your party's commands to be ready but it eases up as the game goes on because you get pretty busy with the combat.

I'm not a fan of turn-based RPGs which was the main reason I haven't touched a 2D FF game until now so this is my first and oh boy, what a first!

Could you just watch a playthrough or read the story then? I wouldn't recommend it. There are certain things that I feel are better experienced.

Gameplay actually wasn't all that gruesome, as I mentioned, it got better thoughout but I know for a fact that I didn't do everything it had to offer because I see other people doing it online and I just had no idea how. That's not to say it's not newcomer friendly though, I mean I beat the game, didn't I? I think it would've just gotten complicated and made me confused if I learned how to do everything in the game anyway.

I found myself liking some of the mechanics and recognizing some of the systems from games as late as today (I'm not sure if this is where they started but I wouldn't be surprised). The random encounters weren't all bad because of the emulator's speed up function but there were definitely times where it felt a little out of hand with the amount I was getting. (I'm looking at you Cave to the Sealed Gate!) So it's all pretty familiar, though there are "Relics" which are kind of like Materia but each member has 2 each where it gives you an ability, f.e. Reflect, every attack hits, extra power, auto cast protect, heal with every step, etc.

One of the drawbacks of using BSNES though was that there was no toggle for a L or R shoulder button, just turbo and while that's not a big problem, that is the button to Flee a battle, so I just never fled. There is an item that lets you escape any dungeon or battle but I didn't really use it, same with the permanent item that Mog has in the cave (pretty late in the game). I'd rather there be a repel than the warp stone, but I figured that if I just fought whenever the opp arrived then I wouldn't have to grind, which is another thing I hate about RPGs! Luckily, I didn't really feel the need to grind other than for the ending.

Difficulty wasn't really a grind but make sure once you get to the floating island, that you know what you're doing because that level was annoying and I felt a very stong spike in difficulty as soon as I landed on it. Another thing is that sometimes it'd glitch and an enemy would have infinite health so I'd just sit there on fast forward, watching and watching then finally use Libra and no damage was made, might be an emulator thing, might be a game thing and although rare, it still happened.

There are these sections called scenarios where the game branches off into multiple different paths and you can choose which order to follow the specific sets of characters. I really like that aspect and makes it seem less linear and interactive because it's letting you choose how to tell the story. I have a thing for games that let me interact with it (That opera scene is pretty interactive too).

For a 2D sprite game, it has quite a personality with its cutscenes. They can be very cinematic and defintely makes the characters just that more engaging with some of their mannerisms.

Ok, I get it now. The music is bomb. If anything, that would be worth doing a remake for, to get orchestral and updated versions of some of the themes. (I'd probably cry at that opera scene) But Celes' theme is probably my favorite. The PC port has pretty good remixes for the most part though.

Could this use a remake? It's a trivial matter because I think a good majority of fans want it to be remade and I understand why but at the same time I understand the other side of the argument as well. This was the last 2D FF game and that's special, in a way, the story kind of reflects that. And I think with all the personality comes a bit of caution because you might see something in these characters or scenes that may be misinterpreted or done differently in a remake, similar to how you read a book and just imagine how it's playing out. I think it lays enough ground so that you don't "have to interpret" like with most NES games (how the Super Mario Movie was born) from an outsider's point of view, it may first seem that way though. (myself included (yes, I know this was SNES era. Shut up!))

What would I want out of a remake? I would want the airship to return and be able to move around freely but keep the towns pretty faithful (which makes for more linear opportunities). I could see Edgar's tools being used similar to Barrett's but we have "First Soldier" now which is a 3PS Battle Royale, why not have his tools play similar to that? Then actually give him story opportunities to pick up his tools rather than "just because you bought them" It would be a nice natural progression. I would suggest the same with Sabin and Cyan, have them learn their Blitz and Bushido moves by being taught by Duncan, you do learn one move from Duncan in the vanilla game but I'd see it as more opportunity to build your characters and make it feel rewarded. So, in those aspects, I would like to see FF6 remade or improved but as for everything else, they should keep it a lot similar to the original than FF7R did. I think that's where a lot of the criticism with FF7R came from (as well as what I mentioned in the previous paragraph) While I'd prefer a gameplay overhaul similar to what they did with R, I'd rather keep the essence. There aren't sequels or spinoffs or anything of this game so this is all it has (unless you count the ports but that's minimal).

In the CHARACTERS section, I compliment the side-quest system but I would like there to be a better indication as to "what" you're doing, rather than just looking up the next steps or be left to travel around until the goal is clear. They have the quest completion menu as well as waypoints in FF7R, I could see that being put to good use in a game like this. It would also be cool to actually "visibly" wear the gear that you equip to your character but I understand why that isn't utilized in most of the games (probably makes for better character models) especially considering most of these characters' costumes could use an update. You didn't get to use the Magitek suits nearly as much as I thought you would from the marketing and even the dang cover and logo, so a remake could improve on that as well. Another small complaint is that it doesn't tell you what the items do WHILE you're in battle, only when you're in the menu, sorting them and while some are staples like Phoenix Down, I still don't remember what the heck a 'Gold Needle' does.

Overall I'd probably rate the FF games that I've played (but maybe not finished all of) as such: FF7 > FF13 > FF6 > CRISIS CORE > FF15 > FF12 but I think 6 and 13 are kind of interchangeable because if you said one over the other, I wouldn't really argue.

#ff6 #final fantasy #review #ffvi #final fantasy 6 #final fantasy vi #game review #game #it's also considered ff3 but nah

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