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oflights · 5 months

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top 10 books of 2023!!

thank you for tagging me, @elskanellis! i started drafting this right away, ran out of time to post it on 12/31, and am ~circling back now. i read 50 books in 2023, and these are my top 10 faves!

titles, brief #thoughts, etc. under the cut!

Himself, by Jess Kidd

this was so incredible and heart-wrenching and exciting to read. devastatingly beautiful/cheerful dirtbag lad busts into a small irish village to find out what happened to his mother, who was almost certainly murdered, and turns everything upside down. every character is so entertaining and funny and sharp, even the villains. the ending is incredible.

The Winners, by Fredrik Backman

i'd recommend this whole series, even if you don't care about hockey; it's so, so good and emotionally devastating. at its base, the series is about a hockey team in sweden, but really, this series belongs to the character of Benji Ovich, and it's a masterclass in building up a queer hero. it's unflinching in dealing with all that he goes through, and handles a lot of really difficult topics with deftness. the heart of his story, for me, is the question of what happens when you're in love with your best friend who is actually a despicable, evil person, and how can you ever forgive yourself for it?

The Iliad, translated by Emily Wilson

do i have to evangelize this one anymore? it's so fucking good. i've read it about 10 times at this point, i just couldn't bring myself to be finished with it. it's so refreshing and approachable and makes every single character leap off the page. it doesn't pull a single emotional punch (because homer doesn't! and wilson's like "don't look away!")

A Map for the Missing, by Belinda Huijuan Tang

this is one of those books that really comes together as a whole; i didn't know it was going to be a fave until i was finished with it. a chinese immigrant has to go back home to help search for his elderly father, who's gone missing. as he goes, every single thread of his past is tugged on and unravelled and the complexity and depth the narrative achieves is really astounding. the last few pages are an absolute gut-punch.

A Power Unbound, by Freya Marske

purely here for how it redeemed the entire series for me. i'm actually not a big romance person, though i did read more romance than ever this year; i just usually tend to get bored with the same sorts of romance tropes over and over (probably because that's what i read fic to get, not tradpub novels). this one doesn't do anything new or reinvent those tropes or anything, it's just really, really good and engaging and hot. the romance outshines the magic system/plot by far. i'd recommend the series overall, but this one has the best relationship in it AINEC.

Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries, by Heather Fawcett

why do i always like middle grade authors who pivot to adult books waaay more than YA authors who do the same? like how are they so much better? that's definitely the case here. this is really fun fairy book (i went through a fairy phase over the summer) and packed a surprising emotional punch and a really lovely romance. i think it helped that the main character have major howl and sophie vibes. i'm excited for the sequel to come out in a few weeks!

Slewfoot, by Brom

god this was absolutely horrifying and brutal and also incredible? i actually can't believe this is here because it lost me through some of the worst of the witch trial torture (it goes really hard on it, as a warning, and i almost stopped there. her poor cat :/ i can almost never handle it when a cat dies) but!! i'm glad i stuck through because of the ending, which is phenomenal and makes every other bit of it worth it. the mythology is terrific and terrifying, too.

Small Things Like These, by Claire Keegan

possibly the best novella i've ever read? it just packs an incredible punch; it doesn't waste a single word, every square inch is a devastating look at the magdalene laundries and it doesn't hold back at all. so, so good.

Half a Soul, by Olivia Atwater

i'm so glad i discovered olivia atwater this year! this was during the Fairy Phase and it was just really fun and engaging. again, big howl and sophie vibes (this is such a high compliment from me) and i really love the second book in this series, too. it's just a really fun world to get lost in, and i'm excited to read more from this author this year.

He Who Drowned the World, by Shelley Parker-Chan

i had some problems with this, and i didn't love it as much as the first book, though i actually think most of those problems could've been solved with a third book and a longer runway. really wish this was a trilogy. that being said, this was still incredible. i loved every single narrative thread, there were zero emotional punches pulled, and i still think about these characters all the time. read this series if you haven't!!

#book talk #bookblr #2023 reads #book reviews #book recs #excited for 2024 already; i'm going back to 40 books lol #50 was too much pressure #40 is good because if i read more then it's just gravy!

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anxiously-sidequesting · 6 months

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#inspired when i saw an ad on youtube for wizard101 #where it said “come play for free and explore 16 different worlds!!!” and i was like okay thats a fucking lie #you cant even get all the way through the FIRST world #personally i think its stupid and inconvenient to have to pay to play the MAIN QUESTLINE #for the people who dont have time to grind the set amount of time you pay for membership or those who dont have money #you either pay for a year and are pressured to do as much as you can before time runs out #or you're stuck doing nothing. there's very little you can do without membership #like the main selling point of the game is so you can finish the story. thats what we download the game for in the first place #it gives you the impression that the priority here is your money and not the consumer's enjoyment and comfort #like there are plenty of games who make the entire game free and still are well off #we pay like 40-50 dollars on bundles and even more than that on crowns. that should be more than enough #there are other games where if you dont have membership it barely affects your gameplay experience overall #or games that have no membership function but still can make decent money #imo having to pay to just actually play the game doesnt make it free. like yeah you can do other stuff like fish and duel each other-#and thats it. you walk around the commons and talk ig #thats like the biggest reason i dropped the game its just wayy too expensive and inconvenient to play it #wizard101 #w101 #wiz101 #polls

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meowmeowmessi · 1 year

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messistas can try to give this a positive spin as much as they want but this is the fumble of the century the kind of disastrous decision making skills at club level that i was talking abt there's no coming back from this

#remember that wasted potential comment. yeah that. he's exhibiting those tendencies again bc time is a flat circle #he fumbled the b'dor too i'm going to have to watch pep present messi's 8th to haalarse the sport is gone im going to die #he should've just retired after the wc bc what the hell is this. like there's no way he's staying fit in the mls #literally a bottom tier league that makes players like riqui puig look like maradona. it's less football and more business #like yeah sure he doesn't owe us fans anything etc etc but HE'S STILL THE BEST ITW LITERALLY GOING TOE TO TOE WITH THE BABY GOATS RN???#most dribbles in the top 5 leagues after vinicius most assists right after kdb i think and so much more #and he's taking all that to eagle land so some fat floridian can watch messi caviar ball????? WHAT #messi look me in the eye this isn't you #pep said without pressure messi gets bored oh it's so so joever he's actually finished he's packed it up #i'm going to need 50 business days to process this

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wurm-food · 1 year

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*stares at the piles of incomplete creative projects I’ve made for myself*

TIME TO BE AMBITIOUS AND START ANOTHER PROJECT >:3

#I mean idk yet #I’m getting 50 millions steps ahead of myself. as usual.#for now I’ll just reserve a url…#we’ll see if I actually take this anywhere #I don’t want to talk about it too much so I don’t put any pressure on myself to follow through #(but if you ask reallyyyyyyyy nicely maybe I might tell a select few. maybe. don’t look at me)#wurm.txt

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bcofl0ve · 1 year

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also random but do any of you keep up with the royals? i’m half british so it’s unfortunately in my blood to be interested in them even if i have my ethical issues with the monarchy LOL

#booo william #i’m kinda 50/50 on kate #do i dobut she could’ve been kinder to meghan no #but idk i feel some level of pity for any woman in her position #love the kids #though i think people are putting too much pressure on louis and charlotte to break away #she’s not “diana’s revenge” she is a CHILD she’s 8 years old let’s cool it a little #she’s adorable though what a little peanut #gossip time with mollie #the royals

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oceandiagonale · 2 years

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Do you plan on getting Pokemon Scarlet/Violet?

yeah, I REALLY want to get Violet!

buuuuut tbh I won't have time to play it until mid-december -- I have a paper to write, a mini-version-of-a-thesis to write, and then a week of [completely unpaid because of course it is 😭] severe overtime -- we're talking I leave the house at 11:30am and get home at 9-10pm, and then one more week of 20 hours of [unpaid] work before I'm finally free on the 17th or so

also I need to get gene home before I can switch to a new game mentally and think about doing a (probably a much simpler) run closer to what I did for swsh, which means getting the whole postgame drawn before then and overall I'm very

#oceandi answers #anonymous #I'll do it one day I promise 😔#tag rambling #I know I gripe about it too much but seriously the fact that I'm working 20 hours a week (it's supposed to be 10 but I've been peer #pressured into doing twice that and unfortunately now I'm in too deep to stop 😐)#it bothers me a lot. especially when I get told that not working /30/ unpaid hours a week means that I'm not dedicated.#like I'm sorry but I have my whole life to work 40-50 hours a week. I'm holding on to what I can while I can #I know I don't have much of a life but dang it I like what I have 😭😭😭#anyways it's just like hey dude maybe if I was also making $5000/month I would not mind the week of overtime #or like even 1/4 of that which is the time that I'm supposed to be doing #well either way I'll get around to sv I just wish people would tag things until like. new year's bc a lot of people won't #get it until their respective commercialized holiday #I don't want to see the story ahead of time 😔

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avatardoggo · 2 years

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pretty sure my psych prof boosted my exam mark significantly bc there's no way i passed on my own 🥹

#SO to professor abeare he's a real one frfr #honestly such a compassionate guy when i told him about the funeral and everything he was like when do YOU want to do the exam :') like sir #stop showing me basic kindness im going to screamcrybarf all over your plaid suit #and i honestly tried studying during my reading week but between getting ready to speak at the funeral actually speaking at it and the afte #r it was too much pressure #and i was even telling my roommate how i felt like i failed and she was like 'well considering the circumstances i think you shouldn't be #too hard on urself and i- 🥺#ppl need to stop being kind to me my heart can't take it #so ya highlight of my week is getting a 50% on my psych exam when i guessed basically every answer #vk overshares in the tags #thanks for everyone that's praying for me also it means a ton <3!

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funkle420 · 23 days

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#USD #also if you want you can specify a specific number in the replies #like how much would YOU be able to pay?#i dont wanna charge more than $50 at most cause then the pressures gonna make me be all perfectionist #and then ill put way too mcuh effort into it #but also #i need money and wanna charge what im worth #im thinkin ill make these have a 1 hr time limit #and if you want a more involved doodle then you pay double #OOH ok so whatever price ppl like best will be the hourly rate and ill advertise them as pay-per-hr art #i dont wnna call them sketch commissions cause my sketches are messy as hell and i wanna make some cute stuff #but these are kinda like sketches #the buggy x gaimon one up there probabbly shouldn't even be there since it took me over an hour

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fazcinatingblog · 3 months

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Imagine if out of all the mistakes I've made, the things Sophia thinks I'm doing wrong, the one thing that gets me fired is that I don't agree to the boss smoking in the office.

#no okay it's fine i can't get fired she wouldn't do that #but like #it makes me so mad that i just wanted to stay a little bit overtime to catch up on a few things and she wouldn't let me #wanted me to go home so that she could smoke inside #it's so unfair #she puts so much pressure on me to get $28k invoices a week and doesn't understand that my desk is an absolute mess because of it #it's like when she gave too much work to Nina and then nina asked to do overtime (to get it all done) and sophia said no #i mean i haven't asked to be paid for overtime but I'm not doing anything important tbh just trying to get myself together a little bit #like i get that she's on a walker and not mobile much at all but surely that's ridiculous to smoke inside?????#the really guy was still there (he was driving her home) like did she actually smoke inside the office???? with him there??????#that's ridiculous #that shouldn't happen?????#i get that smoking was everywhere when she was younger and obviously she's Greek so if she's been there then yeah it's everywhere but #oh my god #i think she only took up smoking after her divorce so like in her 50's i assume but still #just #i can't #I'll just be processing this the entire weekend and not absorbing the football at all #crying over Collingwood while also mentally turning my brain inside out about Sophia

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youngks-smile · 3 months

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What I Want You To Know About Long COVID

Well lads, I've been suffering from Long COVID for over a year now. My life is at a complete standstill. I'm 25 years old and I'm too sick to go back to school, I can't work, I had to move back in with my parents and I'm still stuck here.

Here are just a few things I wish people knew about Long COVID, including things I didn't know myself until I got it.

COVID destroys your immune system. Yes, even if you don't have Long COVID. Are you getting sick more often now? When you get sick, does it last longer? There are many studies showing that COVID causes t cell depletion, even in mild COVID cases! T cells are how your body remembers how to fight off infections you've had before so losing those cells? Bad news.

Your initial infection can be mild and you can still get Long COVID. Right from Yale Medicine, "Most people with Long COVID had mild acute COVID." (This is also a good link for a basic Long COVID overview).

There can be a gap of time between when you "get better" from the initial COVID infection to the onset of Long COVID symptoms. Some people get sick with an initial COVID infection and never get better. Some get better and then weeks or months later start developing Long COVID symptoms. Long COVID symptoms can even fluctuate over time, can go away for months and then suddenly come back.

So many people have Long COVID and don't realize it. Do you feel more tired lately but no matter how much you sleep, nothing helps? Is it harder to concentrate at work or school? Can you just not think like you used to? You could have Long COVID and not even know it. Even mild post-COVID symptoms are still Long COVID.

COVID can do anything to your body. Long COVID has over 200 recognized symptoms and can affect basically any part or system of your body. There is no one mechanism or cause of Long COVID which unfortunately also means there's no one cure either.

The effects of COVID are cumulative. Each COVID reinfection increases your chances of developing Long COVID. COVID is also affecting your body in other ways, yes, even if you're otherwise young and healthy! "Repeat COVID-19 infections increase risk of organ failure, death".

Once you have Long COVID, repeat COVID infections will make your symptoms worse. "80% [of Long COVID patients] saw their symptoms worsen [from reinfection]. In 60% of people who were in recovery or remission from Long COVID, reinfection caused a recurrence of Long COVID."

There is a lot more I want to say about Long COVID but I want to keep this post at least somewhat manageable to read. Like how when COVID is contracted during pregnancy, those COVID-exposed fetuses have a 6.3-fold increased risk of motor developmental delays, or that another study found 50% of babies exposed to COVID in utero had developmental delays.

You need to keep caring about COVID, for others around you and also for yourself even if you're "healthy". Everyone is at risk. And don't forget 40-60% of COVID infections are asymptomatic, which is why masking even if you feel fine is crucial. The only way right now to not get Long COVID is to not get COVID in the first place. It's not too late, if you've stopped masking it's never too late to start again! I know it's easy to get distracted by things in your life that seem more real than the possibility of getting sick some time in the future, and the peer pressure to not mask can be intense. But it only feels less real or less important until your entire life is having Long COVID. Trust me.

I know this is a complicated issue, many people can't afford to stay home when sick even if they want to because of their jobs, there are disgusting policies trying to ban wearing masks, but please if you can. Keep masking. Masking works, masking saves lives.

This post got a bit longer than I wanted so below the cut is a non-exhaustive list of my Long COVID symptoms and some of my experiences as one of the "healthy young people" who got "unlucky". cw brief mention of suicidal ideation.

Welcome to the Thunderdome that is my body with Long COVID. Keep in mind these are just my experiences and symptoms, Long COVID can cause any range of symptoms at varying severities.

Dysautonomia: Exercise intolerance, Post-Exertional Malaise (PEM), fatigue, and heat intolerance. What do those things mean? Here's some specific examples. Absolutely terrible circulation I am so cold all the time but also, if I get a little too warm I will pass out. Eating hot food makes my heart rate spike, I sweat, my body feels heavy. Blood pooling and pins and needles in my feet when I walk. Don't even think about exercising past walking, it's impossible. I used to work out an hour a day 4 times a week and now walking up one flight of stairs makes my heart pound and I can't breathe. Can't take even just warm showers anymore or I will pass out. Heat rashes from being in the sun for 10 minutes.

Digestive issues: Honestly too many to name but: constant bloating, extreme nausea, constipation, slow motility, lack of appetite, just so much cramping and pain. I lost 18 pounds from Long COVID, as someone who was already considered underweight their entire life, and almost had to get a shunt put into my chest to deliver nutrients because I was nearly completely unable to eat. For the first 6 months of Long COVID, if I could manage 600 calories a day, that was a good day.

Histamine intolerance: Oh boy. My worst symptoms, I don't even know where to start with it. If you know Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) it's very similar. I can only eat 19 foods. If i eat a single bite of something not on that list, it's 48 hours of absolute hell. Coughing, migraines, itchy eyes, such extreme nausea I cannot even describe it, panic/feeling of doom, racing heart rate, derealization, rash, uncontrollable muscle tremors. I only learned about histamine intolerance 5 months into having Long COVID so before that, I was experiencing these symptoms nearly every single day. Terrifying isn't even a strong enough word to describe how it felt to experience all this and have no idea what it was, how to stop it, or if it would ever stop. Really dark times.

Neurological issues: More of that derealization. Inability to concentrate. Anxiety. OCD-like symptoms such as thoughts getting "stuck" in my head, repeating 24/7 completely unable to stop them, genuinely felt like my brain had cracked open and I had lost my mind. Constant dizziness like I'm on a boat.

Sleep issues: I sleep like garbage. I have insomnia, I wake up dozens of times every night and every single time I sleep I have intensely vivid dreams. I can't sleep longer than 7 hours total no matter how exhausted I am. It is exhausting. I'm exhausted, I'm so so tired.

And finally. Just. Really intense suicidal ideation. My body, my health, my entire life has been stolen from me because someone else decided my life was worth less to them than wearing a mask or staying home if they feel sick. Before I got Long COVID, I was preparing to go to South Korea to teach English, then on to a PhD in neurolinguistics, I was supposed to meet my long distance partner and had already booked plane tickets when I got sick. All of that has been destroyed.

Most of us with Long COVID are stuck in a cycle of being extremely sick, then if you're lucky you'll slowly get better over months, just to get reinfected and go right back where you started or worse. Honestly, I'm not scared of dying from COVID. I'm scared of living for a long time, suffering from Long COVID the entire time. This isn't living.

I don't know how to end this now. I'm still fighting, I'm trying experimental treatments, I'm not giving up yet. I hope everyone reading this stays healthy and well.

#long covid #covid 19 #covid isn't over #pandemic

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mrfoox · 11 months

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Lmao... Told Roo I'm bummed that I can't get Fabian to come visit me and he went on an heartfelt rant

"He's such a noob, I told him just days ago that it's an disgrace that he haven't visited you yet! You live in the same country! He sucks, Goddammit. He have so much free time, he isn't busy with much"

#miranda talking shit #Ajjdbdjdksjsjdjdjdj i love them....#The fact roo is so emotional about it really made me :') yeah #Me: uh... I mean i can go to Stockholm too... But then I'd HAVE to spend moneh for hotel and food so thats like 3-4x more expensive at best #If he comes here he can stay with me and eat for free....#Roo: YEAH all he have to spend money on is train tickets? How much is that??#Me: um. Ive checked and around 30-40 euro if youre lucky. 50+ if not. So ride here and back would be around 60-80 euro #Roo: i cant believe that guy... He got no excuse now. Its the same country !!!!!#The boys #Roo #Fabian #My less understanding and timid side agreed but also i dont want to... Pressure him. Like maybe he doesn't want to...#Then again I'd not understand why he wouldn't want to if he actually ... Likes me? Idk #Like me roo and matt managed to meet up in 2018 and i flew to london for it alone. Id do it again in a heartbeat lol #Its funny that roo gets so upset about it tho... Feels like hes doing it for me #Idk if i need to be more aggressive about it and tell him WHEN he should come #I have ASD and i often prefer people to decide things for me or give me a few options #But everytime i bring it up he says like 'yeah this summer probably'#At one hand i feel hurt bc i feel like he doesnt actually want to... But also i feel guilty for somewhat forcing it on him....#Ofc i really REALLY want to meet him and roo. Unfortunately roo lived in another country so that needs more planning...#Fabian is less than 1000km away ... He could take a train and be here in 6h or a flight in 1h...#Id mentioned i would basically provide him with house and food. If he rather pay for an hotel thats like 90euro per night here but like #Whatever makes him more comfortable? I just ... Am mentally GOOD for the first time in history ... I want to spend time with people i love

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myunghology · 6 months

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twisted wonderland 2nd years, except they're helplessly in love.

pairings ; riddle, ruggie, azul, jade, floyd, kalim, jamil, silver x gn! reader. (seperate).

tw ; none.. unless it's a bit too cheesy..?

a/n ; my first twst work.. im terrified!!

☆ — RiDDLE ROSEHEARTS

nope. will not allow it. he has his priority- which is his grades. he won't allow himself to be distracted by you. (more below the cut!)

but you are gorgeous tho, he'll admit that.

oh, would you look at that.. he's been distracted.

other students, even students outside heartslabyul are getting a bit weirded out, like what do you mean he's stopping in his tracks just to watch you pass by.

doesn't even notice it himself that he's staring at you. it's about time he notices that he'd stopped walking is when floyd smacked his head..

well, to be fair, he's noticed himself that he gets nervous whenever he invites you to unbirthday parties, he feels like everything has to be perfect.

—which is why some heartslabyul students are kinda annoyed when you come. only because they have to do so much with riddle pressuring them every 10 minutes. they like you generally though!

plus riddle seems more relaxed when you're around. that's just a bonus though! (is it really)

cater has multiple pictures of riddle just staring at you— his gaze softening whenever his eyes land on you instinctively.

he offers to hold open the door for you whenever you run into each other outside the classrooms, he offers to help you whenever you ever get injured playing some sport, and he even let's you borrow his notes if you were absent in class for a good reason.

sure, maybe he might be a bit arrogant, and a bit of a cry baby, and definitely strict— but he has respect for everyone. especially you.

riddle rosehearts is truly, a gentleman in a world full of boys.

☆ — RUGGiE BUCCHi

him? in love? absolutely.

if ruggie was in love, it'll probably be obvious. he tries to hide it though,, but it's clear he isn't good at that.

he's pretty chill around you though, nothing too awkward.

let me tell you this, whenever you ask him for a request, he'll want something back. no, he isn't gonna ask for a kiss or a date. stop imagining that.

he wants you to pay him back by a favor, so that he can pull the "you owe me a favor, since i did ___ for you." card.

okay maybe then he'll ask you on a date. or he'll ask you to steal something from a student.

what can i say.. it's 50/50.. slowly leaning onto the date idea though.

ruggie isn't oblivious, or stupid either. he knows when he's in love. he's just too afraid to admit it. sometimes leona makes fun of him for being a "wimp" and to just confess.

also stares at you, but in class this time. bro isn't listening at all actually because he's too busy looking at you.

maybe i will admit that ruggie is a little shit but he's actually a sweetheart when he wants to be. it's a win/win situation if you like annoying guys but has a soft spot for you.

spoiler: he eventually sucks it tf up and soon confesses.

☆ — AZUL ASHENGROTTO

azul may be a tad bit conscious about what you think about him. screw that- he's definitely conscious about what you think about him. from not only about what happened during his overblot and from his insecurities.

he knows you aren't that type of person, but he can't help it.

it makes him feel a million times better when you reassure him though. even if it's making him a bit delusional.. but then again you might be saying that just because you pity him.

"or maybe they're just nice and they actually care have you ever thought of that" - floyd

you go to monstro lounge about once a week, and for sure, azul has sent jade and floyd to take care of you well, since of couse, most of the time he's busy.

floyd almost exposed azul's crush on you once when you two were chatting, thankfully jade was there to cover his mouth before he continued speaking.

but when he is actually there face to face actually talking to you, he sounds smug but in reality, he's a nervous wreck in the inside. you obviously know that though.

wait till you tell him that you find him cute..

he explodes

no i'm joking, he's just blushing really hard. like.. too much. again- it's kinda obvious that he likes you whenever you compliment him.

☆ — JADE LEECH

so, so respectful when talking to you. still a bit teasing though. he offers to help you even if you're carrying just one thing.

always glad to see you when you're visiting monstro lounge, floyd loves you just as much, but in a platonic way! he isn't going to steal jades version of his 'shirmpy'.

tried to make a drink thats named by you, azul didn't allow it, unfortunately. (for him). i'd be embarrassed tbh.

in your opinion jade is a bit weird.. but he's still super nice to you, no matter how weird this guy seems. he would never do anything that would make you uncomfortable.

similar to riddle- he opens doors for you, sometimes offers to cook for you, and sometimes treats you whenever you're at montro lounge. only if azul allows it though, which is pretty rare. like jade wtf dym "its on the house" no it's not shut up.

you sometimes wonder if his mushrooms are safe to eat or not.

it's probably best not to ask him though.

he may or may have not tried breaking into your dorm room because you weren't attending class and you weren't responding to his messages asking where you were. it was all on concern tho don't worry i swe-

genuinely doesn't have a problem with confessing, but he only confesses until he's confident that you like him back.

trigger warning for floyd though since he's probably gonna pop out anytime soon during the confession..

☆ — FLOYD LEECH

my condolences if he ever likes you.

just kidding, it'd be pretty fun if floyd started to like you. only if you really like his bone crushing hugs.

doesn't hide his crush on you at all, you gotta be super oblivious if you don't notice it if he didn't even confess to you yet the moment he finds out that he likes you.

you're definitely scared shitless whenever you see him. when you try to run away he chases you around the halls and he's so damn fast, it's nearly impossible to escape him.

plus- his mood swings too? who knows if he'll get excited when you run away from him or if he's gonna get pissed off.. but mostly he gets excited though.

has kabedoned you one, too many times. mostly to fluster you, but also to get your attention.

easily gets jealous- especially when someone else hugs you for a long time. no one can hug his shrimpy except him! he isn't possessive, that's just how floyd is.

also stares at you in class- but throws paper airplanes at you, with the writings inside saying "HI".

ends up getting in trouble because either he got caught, or riddle snitched. most likely the second one tho.

drags you to monstro lounge to help him clean up his OWN messes, but he (might) have intentionally done this to spend time with you..

☆ — KALiM AL-ASiM

probably one of the best people ever to have a crush on you if that even makes sense..

spoils you rotten, even more than when he spoils his friends which is obviously already huge. wanna buy something online but can't? he's already asking for the link so he can buy it for you!

you obviously feel bad whenever he does this, so you try to remind him that he doesn't have to do all of this stuff for you.

not only with gifts, he spoils you rotten with affection too. you feel bad for jamil as well, he seems annoyed, but as long as kalim's happy.

very very respectful and nice to you, and will stop anything you don't want him to do anytime, he sometimes flirts with you unintentionally too..

hugs you literally at literally any chance he gets, he's also pretty clingy, if you haven't noticed that yet.

shows you off to other scarabia students, it's pretty obvious that he has a crush on you too.

bro's lovesick

gets so upset when something happens to you because of him, worries that people will try to do some crazy shit to you as well because you have a good connection with him..

introduces you to his family like you're his wife or something.. and then when you ask him what are you guys he'll go:

"are we not engaged" "NO??"

he was fully convinced that you guys were dating already

he's a little bit delusional but that's ok..

☆ — JAMiL ViPER

like riddle, jamil does not have the time to fall in love with someone since he's already busting his ass off taking care of kalim.. and with his academics too. plus the overblot situation but we don't talk about that.

maybe you are a little bit scared of him as well, but little do you know this guy will literally adjust for you anytime. it's really hard to see though when he does.

VERY hard to see that he has a crush on you though. you'd confess and he'd be like,

"i gave you so much signs what do you mean i might not like you back"

you were starstruck when you heard him say that. what does he mean signs. does he mean when he glared at you in class..? you thought you did something wrong for a second.

like floyd, kalim once almost exposed jamil for liking you accidentally.. don't get me wrong, jamil didn't tell kalim anything, he just found out himself.

jamil definitely likes you trying his culture's food, especially if he cooked it himself! it's not obvious, but he lets a small smile creep up onto his lips.

studies with you too if you're ever having a hard time. studying? nah, more like tutoring.. he's kinda harsh at first but then softens up a bit when he sees that you're really struggling.

☆ — SiLVER

im sure we all know silver is a generally pretty reserved person. and that doesn't change even when he's crushing on you.

but you do notice him stealing glances from time to time whenever you walk past him, lilia definitely asks him about that.

he may be a tad bit more open with you than others? but it's purely because he trusts you.

you sometimes tie his hair to the hairstyle called "apple hair" when he's sleeping and he doesn't notice even when he wakes up, he only notices after looking at a mirror..

genuinely doesn't mind though. lilia thinks it's adorable (he also thinks you guys are perfect for each other)

and that's why lilias opinions are always important..

generally, you guys usually talk through chat because you two don't really have the time to talk to each other physically.

but still, he still thinks you're beautiful. even if he can't see you all the time. this dynamic is kinda like a hallway crush typebeat..??

lilia is your number 1 fan alongside malleus!! sebek still has mixed feelings but he likes you generally! he just isn't sure if he likes you for silver.. or if he's not sure if he likes silver for you.. does that make sense?

after awhile he joins malleus and lilia.

©myunghology

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inupibaldspot · 1 month

Text

Let’s Give it One More Try

pairing: gojo satoru x reader

Note ₊˚⊹♡ : you and gojo are getting a divorce :((

Your fingers tighten at the edge of the papers and then slammed it onto a fancy desk, designed by a famous architect; a name you had forgotten. I mean… if you were to remember every designer of the furniture inside the house, your brain would probably explode.

Your lawyer beside you shivers as he suddenly feels the air around him grow cold, at a very rapid pace. His eyes wander to see the air conditioning still working, and his eyes the trail towards his side. He gulps as he takes on his clients appearance, you.

Your face was cold and actions were merciless. “These are my part of the agreement.” You spat viciously.

“Dealing with these is a hassle so let’s get over this quickly.” Your eyes trail to your lawyer, who quickly straightens under your gaze as he nods in agreement. “But I slept well without you. The morning is also very peaceful; I didn’t have my ears bleeding while I ate my breakfast.”

“Thank god you’ve been eating well. Back when we first met I remember you’d never eat properly.” To your dismay, Gojo beams at you full of affection with makes your resolve waver. “I almost fainted when you told me you forget to eat then-“

“— I said we’ll keep this short, Gojo-san.” You says as you lean back, crossing your hands. There was a brief second where you could see Gojo’s eyes half-opens and his eye brows furrowed slightly,a thing he does when he feels hurt.

You bite your lips before you give in and sigh. “I haven’t skipped a meal.…”

Your face twitches with annoyance when you see your now ex-husband with still a melted look, eyes slightly dazed and flowers blooming in the background as he focuses on only you. You are annoyed because satoru makes you waver.

Your lawyer clears his throat as he hands over another stack of paper over. “My client wants to do a 50-50 and—“

“Are you crazy?” Gojo’s lawyer jumps out of his seats as his face pulls into a frown. “You want 50 percent of THE Gojo Satoru’s property?”

“Yeah!” Gojo also jumps out of his seat, a nerve pops on his forehead in annoying. “How could you ever think of that?!”

Your lawyer smalls at the sudden outburst.

“That’s too much!”

“That’s too little! Take all of it, babe.”

“Huh?” The duo sitting at the other side of the table looks at each other at confusion as they give slow dumb blinks. His lawyer clears his throat. “No gojo-san, what your saying is your going to give the entirety of Gojo estate to your now ex-wife.”

“Yup.” Gojo gives his answer a bit too quickly.

“That’s fucking dumb.”

“Woah— you’re my lawyer! You can’t be saying that.” Gojo shouts back as his lawyer massages his temple taking a seat.

“Take it all babe.” Gojo turns to you and smiles, it was a simple boyish smile, taking on the look of a man who was simply and all in love. “Become the head of the Gojo clan.” He adds with a laugh.

But you didn’t take that lightly as your eyebrow furrowed. “Are you making fun of me?”

“Of course not.” Gojo leans back, on arms over his seat and other on his lap, legs spread apart. Your ex-husband was so attractive. “Just—“

He tilts his head as his smile is softening. “Just before all this…let’s give it one more try.” His voice was strained taking on a tone one would make when they beg. “But this time, I promise I’ll be by your side. Let’s live alone in an apartment, just two of us?”

Your breath hitched.

You knew what Gojo was implying. Being wed to Gojo Satoru meant you were always under watchful eyes. Every breath you take, every step, every strand of hair that was messed up would be judged; and you collapsed under the pressure of those watching eyes.

And now Gojo was proposing you what you’ve always wanted. Memories made by newly wed lovers in a small yet affordable apartment where we could just cook and dine amongst ourselves, take afternoon naps on the sofa on lazy sundays and breathy soft kisses as he could pick you and place you on the counter top.

That’s was all you wanted.

“I realized how you were feeling about everything…”Gojo’s voice was unusually soft, and raspy as if he was struggling to speak. “so I actually wanted to surprise you with an apartment but…”

But before that you slammed the divorce paper on his face.

“Please y/n… just one final chance.” His slightly teary blue eyes looking into yours, makes your breathing stop. “Can you let me be yours again…?”

You swallow, the busy world now contains simply two of you in your vision as fingers play nervously with eachother as your finally open your mouth to speak.

“—“

Note ₊˚⊹♡ : so now the question is do you say yes or no? ✧

Reblogs, like and comment are appreciated! Love this work? Check out other here

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen imagine #jujutsu kaisen x reader #gojou satoru x reader #gojo x reader #gojo imagine #gojo imagines #gojo satoru imagine #gojo satoru x reader #gojo angst #jjk gojo #gojo saturo #gojo x you #gojo x y/n #gojo fluff #jjk imagine #jjk fanfic

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angel-eyes05 · 1 year

Text

to leave the warmest bed i've ever known

pairing: spiderwoman!reader x miguel o’hara

summary: after miguel’s fight with miles, you confront him in his office

warnings: this whole thing is basically one big argument there’s SO much angst, implied suicide attempt, HUGE ATSV SPOILERS DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THIS MOVIE, im projecting a little in some parts of this ngl (i cried writing a certain section of this, you'll know it when you read it lmao), mentions and descriptions of blood, gore, and death

word count: 4.1k

notes: i watched the movie yesterday…and miguel is on my mind. but i remember reading this namor x reader fanfic after i watched wakanda forever of a similar idea to this and i loved it so this is HEAVILY inspired by that fic, but just make it miguel. i would link it but ngl that was so long ago and i dont remember the author. if i end up finding it again ill put it here. also, just pretend miguel has been doing this whole spider society thing for a couple of years at least, it just needs to work like that for this ik its probably not canon but just roll with it lmao. and yes the title is a taylor swift lyric im so glad you noticed (im so sorry she's in my brain rn with the eras tour)

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The anger boiled up inside your chest as you stormed your way across the lobby. Hundreds of different Spider-Man variants were scattered across the area, some more injured than the others. It sickened you sometimes. How he had so many people under his grasp and just decided to throw some of them at the walls sometimes, not caring how hard they hit the floor because they were all just ammo to him. How despite his denials of it, that’s probably what your role was to him as well. Nothing more than a bullet in his massive machine gun.

You normally tried not to think about it, how his determination towards his goal sometimes meant lack of care for others. But this time he had just gone too far. You always had a soft spot for Miles, watching closely on him whenever Miguel would let you go though scanners of all the different variants. You admired his struggle, but eventual success to taking up the previous Peter’s mantle, and always hated how Miguel talked about him. You knew there was no way Miles could’ve asked for any of this. For the pressures and struggles of being a Spider-Man, for everything causing such a strained relationship with his parents, for the death of his uncle, and for what will be the eventual death of his father. You definitely didn’t.

Ok lets do this one last time. Eh, whatever, there’s probably gonna be 50 other introductions after this one so it doesn’t really matter.

Being Earth-837’s Spider-Man has never been easy. Especially since you were bit when you were only 13 (another reason you sympathized with Miles and Gwen). Your life had followed the order of canon events to a perfect T, your older brother killed in a fight with a robber only two months after you were bit. You tried to overcome the burden of your powers by trying to live as normal of a teenage life as possible, but it was mostly in vain, having to give up multiple friendships and relationships in fear of those you love getting hurt. This was only elevated when your boyfriend Peter was murdered in the crossfire of an encounter with Doc Ock. You didn’t understand. You couldn’t. What you had done to deserve all of this. All you did was just be in the wrong place at the wrong time. You wonder sometimes what would happen if someone was in the same place you were when you got bit. If someone else went to the closed down area of that museum and ran into that spider. That stupid spider that ruined your life. Those thoughts slowly started to disappear for a bit. For a few years things were easy. Things seemed like they were finally going in your favor.

You were 25 when it happened. The last canon event. Ever since you were a little girl you hated your mother’s job. Losing nights of sleep over if she would come home or not. She always did though. She was good at her job. Too good though. Good enough to get promoted to police captain, which for who you were, was basically sealing her fate. She saved so many people that day. You were too busy fighting Venom to notice how much collateral damage you were causing in the process. Your mother’s job was to evacuate all the citizens away from the fight. She died shielding a child from incoming debris. A noble way to go. But god was it gruesome. You found her after the fight was over, two metal poles impaling her. One through her stomach and one straight through her face, pools of blood growing bigger below her as she was left there, all the paramedics busy trying to save the heavily injured. You froze when you finally recognized her, unable to at first due to how mutilated her face was from the pole. Suddenly, you were transported back to being a six year old, falling asleep outside the door to your mother’s bedroom so you would know exactly when she would come home. Purposefully falling asleep in her arms so that she couldn’t go anywhere.

When you used the key she had given you to get into her apartment that night, and you slept in her room, desperate to intake anything left of her before she was fully gone. You doused yourself in her perfume so it still felt like she was standing right behind you. You had always loved her smell. The smell of vanilla, curl product, and fancy perfume. They were attached to memories you had of her. Trying on her heels when you were a kid to try and be fancy like her. Smelling her hair in the morning before school to comfort you before she left for work. Despite all of this bringing you comfort, all it really did was cause further denial in your heart. That one day you were gonna hear the keys clacking in the keyhole to your apartment one more time. That’s all you really wanted. You would give everything up in a heartbeat just to hear her police scanner go off one last time. But it wasn’t going to. And it was your fault. Deep down you knew it was. You should’ve done a better job controlling the debris. You had always been a messy fighter, but you didn’t know it was going to mean anything until it was too late.

How you got up to the top of that building is still a blur to you to this day. But next thing you know, you were looking at the New York City skyline from the very top of the Empire State Building. And at the very edge too. You heard some sounds behind you, but you just decided it was the wind howling from how high up you were. You were just so tired. Everything and everyone you loved was cursed all because of you. And with your mother as the most recent victim, you decided you finally had enough. You took a deep breath, eyes overflowed with water, as you set your foot forward.

Your plummet was interrupted by a sudden contact you felt to your forearm. Shock filled your body as you turned around to look at what had stopped your attempt. The blue hand was massive, nearly wrapping back around onto itself as it held onto you for dear life. You finally looked up at face that the hand belonged to. The mask that covered the massive figure was a strange one. Blue with strange red silhouettes for the eyes. It kind of reminded you of…your own costume? That couldn’t be though there was no way. This must be the afterlife or something. You already jumped and that's why you didn’t remember your way up to the top. This was some kind of creature trying to stop you from jumping down to hell below. His breaths were heavy and loud, almost like he was desperate to stop you. This convinced you that this was real, which caused you to try to escape from his grip. He was stronger than you, and was putting up a huge fight. You were slick though. Once you were out of his hand, you closed your eyes and quickly made your jump. Everything flashed before your eyes. Your brother, Peter, your mom. You were hoping to see them soon. This was very quickly interrupted again when you suddenly stopped falling. Something had attached itself to your stomach. You opened your eyes. A web? This web was much different than yours though. It was glowing a bright, neon orange.

The man was holding onto the end of it tightly with both hands. His mask then disappeared to show his face. His was long, matching how big the rest of his body was, defined cheek bones sticking out. Brown wavy hair slicked back with a few loose strands flying out in the wind. The look of desperation on his face stook out most of all. Why did he care so much? He didn’t know you, and you definitely didn’t know him. “Let me pull you up. Please,” he said to you between shaky pants. You stared at him for a bit before nodding. He slowly pulled you up with the string of his web, each move more careful than the last. As soon as your feet were planted safely back on the roof of the building, he wrapped you up in his massive arms. You appreciated the gesture, but you didn’t return it, still very confused about why he was so concerned. He was so big around your body though, you couldn’t help but feel a little comforted, feeling his still shaky breaths against the hairs of your neck. Soon after, he clicked on some buttons on his neon orange watch and led you into a portal.

The rest is history. You’re grateful he found you that day. It allowed you to meet so many people, Peter B., Jess, Gwen, Hobie, Ben, Pavitr, Margo. They all related to you and you felt like you could share things with them that you couldn’t do with anyone else. You had grown especially close to Peter and Jess, both of them having been in the game for a long time, just like you. They both knew how you felt, having lost so much and growing so tired after so many years. Peter even named you as Mayday’s godmother when she was born, a gesture that caused you to nearly kill him with your hug. Miguel though was different. He wasn’t nearly as social as the rest of your friends, but you found yourself having much more intimate moments with him (in more ways then one). You eventually found out why Miguel was so concerned for you the day you met. He had taken interest in your abilities early into looking for variants for his little “project”, but refrained from roping you into something so dangerous while you were still in your teens.

Once you were old enough though, he started paying more and more attention, hoping to catch you in a fight and recruit you then. But he was always pulled away with more important duties to attend to. That was until he witnessed your canon event. He had seen it happen so many times before through his scanners. It was going to happen. It had to in order for your universe to not collapse in on itself. But for some reason, yours hurt more than the rest to him. Especially how you coped with it. Seeing you wrap yourself up in her blankets and clothes broke his heart. He knew where this would lead to. That’s why he was there that day. To save you. He had to, or he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself. You got your own watch immediately, along with your own room in the Spider Society headquarters. He stayed close with you for the first month of you being a member of the team. When he wasn’t out on missions, he was with you. You didn’t really know what to label you two as, but whatever was going on, you liked it. And he did too.

That is until Miles came into the picture. Once Miles was bit, all hell broke loose for Miguel. He was always in some alternate dimension catching some Spider-Man villain who got out and rangled them back over here, falling back over to you more beat up and bruised than the last time. You couldn’t imagine how much stress he was under, the fate of the entire multiverse up to him. You had some ways of helping him relieve his stress, but you wish you could convince him that he wasn’t alone in this. But nothing ever got through to him. He had become distant, aloof even. You tried bringing it up to Jess every so often, but she would just brush it off.

“That’s how he’s always been.” Not to you he hasn’t. This week has been hell though. With Spot making it over to Miles, Miguel had been going into rages all week. You had put up with it for now, but that was all about to stop. Watching how harsh he was being on Miles, throwing so many Spider-Men at an innocent boy, risking all of their lives in the process. Disregarding everything Gwen and Peter were feeling and then throwing Gwen back into her broken world with nothing. He had gone too far. No one else was going to stand up to him about it, so you knew it had to be you. Maybe he would listen, maybe he wouldn’t. It didn’t really matter. He just needed to hear it.

“It’s not worth it you know.” The voice snapped you out of your thoughts, stopping you in your tracks. “You know how stubborn he gets over these things,” said Jess, trying to convince you to save your breath. “I don’t care. I have to at least try,” you responded, monotonically. “I just don’t understand how you can follow him so blindly and not see what he’s doing is wrong.” “Because he isn’t wrong. I don’t know about you, but I’m not just gonna stand by and let some kid’s stupid decisions destroy another Earth,” Jess argued. “He’s just trying to save his dad, I can’t understand how that makes him such a bad person,” you said, finally turning around to face her, shocked when she was closer to you than expected.

“You know exactly why. Don’t be so naive, y/n,” she shot back. “You can’t stop me,” you said staring straight into her. She shrugged. “Then I can’t help you.” She began to walk away. You did to, until you heard her say. “You don’t know how much he cares for you.” You turned around to face her again, but her back was still to you, her head tilted ever so slightly to look at you. “If you really do care for the kid, watch what you say to Miguel right now. Cause you might just give him the final push he needs to do what needs to be done.” You didn’t give her a response, and just simply kept walking. You felt Jess’ eyes on your back as you entered the elevator to get up to Miguel’s office.

The elevator ride up felt longer than it should’ve, as you tried to gather all of your thoughts and emotions together so even if he didn’t listen, your words would still stick with him in some way. You didn’t necessarily want to hurt him (though your fists were telling you otherwise), but you did want him to be aware of what he’s done. Once the doors finally opened, all of that work flew out the window as rage took over your body again, seeing Miguel up there looking at the scanners. The fact that he looked just as normal as he always does made you furious. It’s like nothing happened.

“You know, I could hear you coming in from the lobby,” he said, almost stopping you in your tracks. You hated when he did that. Claiming that he knew what your every move was going to be. Like you were under his control or something. “Yeah, well then you must’ve heard me talking to Jess, which means you know exactly what this is about,” you shot back, stopping to where you could see him perched up there. “Why don’t you just save me the conversation about morality and just come up here and kick my ass already. It’ll save both of us time,” he said, not even taking his eyes off the scanners to look down at you. This only added to your fury. “That’s not what I’m here for Miguel, so don’t you dare try to twist my words here. What you did to that kid was fucked up and you know it.” “Oh yeah, then why didn’t you try to do anything to stop me?” he questioned.

“Because I’m not stupid Miguel. I’m not gonna try to take down hundreds of Spider-Men at once.” “Oh, cause you’re so much better than that?” This wasn’t like him at all. That gentle, kind, and caring Miguel you once knew was gone, taken over by some sort of personal vendetta he had against Miles. “Listen, I don’t know what’s going on with you, but this all needs to stop before it gets taken too far. You’re getting into a fight you can’t win. That kid’s strong and so are his allies. And if you go any further into this, I won’t be here to help you.” He stayed still and only turned his head to look at you. “And what makes you think that you’re so important to my plan that it’ll fall apart if you leave? Have you really become that pretentious?”

Your body froze. Have I really? No no no, that’s exactly what he wants. If you begin to doubt yourself now, you’ll stay and nothing will change. You knew you were right. He was trying to crumble you down, but you wouldn’t let that happen. “And you really think that one kid is going to ruin something that you’ve been working for for years? How insecure you’ve become.” “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” he said, turning back away from you. You did the same, wiping off your face in anger. “I hate it when you do tha-,” you said as you turned back around, but were cut off to find Miguel standing there right in front of you. He was close. Too close to your liking, although in any other circumstance you would’ve found this attractive.

He tilted his head up, but his eyes were down staring daggers into yours. You hated how much he tried to make himself seem more superior to you. “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” he repeated, this time slower as if you were a child. “He’s just a kid Miguel,” you said in a low, quiet voice. “An anomaly. And a dangerous one at that.” “God Miguel, all he wants to do is protect his dad, do you know how insane you sound right now?” you said letting out a slight laugh when you finished. You backed away from him a little. “He doesn’t know how much damage he’ll do with this. Saving his father will only prolong the inevitable. His world will be gone within hours if he does this. All I’m trying to do is make him understand,” he tried to explain. “By trying to kill him.” “You always have to exaggerate the situation,” he said palming his face. “But that’s essentially what you’re trying to do isn’t it? Why not snuff out the problem entirely by taking him out!”

He signed and began to walk away while you were talking, bringing up your anger even more. “Yeah, use all the power you’ve accumulated over the years and just take out the small problem! Except this isn’t just a fly on the wall Miguel. This is a child! An innocent boy who didn’t ask for any of this to happen to him, just like how we didn’t. I get it, I’m sorry that this job is stressful, I really am. But that gives you zero right to act the way you are!” You were screaming at him at this point. You didn’t want to. You didn’t want your emotions to get the best of you. But he was being too stubborn. This was the only way you thought you could get to him. You might not have wanted to, but you needed to hurt him now. It was the only way.

“You can’t be so power blind that you refused to accept the fact that there could be a way around Captain Davis’ death. You said we saved Earth’s before, I’m sure we could do it again.” Your anger only kept rising when he kept walking away and didn’t respond. “This is a personal thing isn’t it?” you asked calmly. You knew it was working now when he stopped walking. “Yeah, it it. You won’t let Miles get his happy ending. Because why should he be pardoned of his burden while the rest of us have suffered so much. While you’ve suffered so much.” The answer to your question was confirmed when Miguel stayed silent. “Just because you didn’t get the life you wanted Miguel, doesn’t mean you have the right to stop other people from getting theirs.”

You knew you overstepped the line when Miguel turned around and started walking towards you, fury burning in his crimson eyes. “Yeah, so what! What if that is what this is all about! You should know better than anyone how much this job takes away from you!” he screamed at you, backing you up into a wall. “Why should he get to be let off so easily, while people like you and me have to suffer so much? Don’t try to turn me into the villain here when I know you’re thinking the exact same thing, y/n.” He wasn’t entirely wrong. You had wondered it at some points. “I won’t let you turn this onto me Miguel, this is about you,” you fired back. “Oh no, you’re not getting off that easily. I know you’re thinking it. And you’re right. Why should Miles get let off so easily when you’ve lost so much.” He held your hands in his, trying to connect to you. “And you have mi vida. You’ve had so much taken from you and it’s unfair. Why should he only have lost one person when you’ve had three taken from you. Your brother, Peter, your moth-.”

He was cut off by your hand striking against his face in a harsh blow. “If you’re smart, and I know you are, you’ll keep those three out of them. I won’t let you drag their names through the dirt for something as stupid as this.” You both stood there for a while, both of your eyes looking towards the ground, hoping it would open up to swallow you both as an escape from this god awful conversation. You never wanted it to come to this. In all honesty, you cared for Miguel. You might’ve even loved him, if you were even capable of doing such a thing. You hoped he felt the same way about you, but in a job like this, he always had at least one wall up around you. It just wasn’t worth it anymore. You were too tired to keep trying for something that was most likely going to fall apart in the end.

“You’re still going after him aren’t you?” you asked, finally breaking the silence. Miguel looked back up at you. “You can’t ask me not to. You know better than anyone why this is so important to me.” He moved his hand up to cup your cheek and kissed your forehead gently. You let it sit there for a minute out of habit before pushing it off your face. “And you must know why I can’t stay anymore then.” His shoulders dropped. “Whatever this thing between us is. It’s over. I can’t stay beside someone who can’t see what he’s doing is wrong.” Miguel’s dropped hand turned into a fist of anger. “Fine,” he spat in your face. “I don’t need someone like you in my way. You’re just a liability to this anyways.” He began to walk away from you back to his scanners. “Just don’t come crying back over to me when your little plan doesn’t work out, cause I won’t help you.” He used his webs to pull himself back up to the platform to keep looking for Miles. You stood there for a second, gathering yourself.

Five years. Out the door just like that. It bewildered you how easily a bond like you two had could be broken all because of one teenager. You began to make your way for the door before you said. “When this is all over…don’t try to find me.” He didn’t respond. Once the elevator doors opened, you rushed inside, desperate to get away from him. So many thoughts rushed through your head as the doors closed and you sunk down back to the lobby to leave. You didn’t have much of a plan. This could end up being a horrible idea. Your gut told you it was the right thing to do though. And that was enough for you. You walked out of the headquarters lobby with a new heart and a new mind, ready to take action for your new plan.

First though, you had to find Gwen.

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a/n: god that took longer than it should've. dw dw i'll do a part 2 if enough people ask for one. im not 100% sure how im gonna do a part 2 cause yk....idk how beyond the spiderverse is gonna go so tbh, we're just gonna make it go the way i want lmao. thanks for reading, ik this was kind of a long one lmao

NEXT CHAPTER

#miguel o’hara #miguel o'hara x reader #spiderman across the spiderverse #spiderman 2099 #into the spider verse #spider-woman reader #across the spiderverse #fem!reader #fanfic #fanfiction #spiderman #spider man #spider man: across the spider verse #spiderverse

5K notes · View notes

toxicanonymity · 1 year

Note

i had dream about this lol. reader is naive/innocent/virgin, they know about sex but not much about masturbation. reader tells joel that they’ve been having this problem at night (usually) where they get all hot and achey down there. joel’s like well i know a way you can fix that feeling!! hopefully this isn’t too outrageous, i just love perv!joel lololll

Aches

900 / Joel x virgin!Reader / joel master

✨ prequel: fires | sequel: thoughts

WARNINGS: I8+ mdni, big girthy age gap (20/50s) only one sleeping bag. fingering, grinding. mention of Joel being a girl dad.

You can't sleep. You scoot your lower body forward and away from Joel's crotch.

"You okay, sweetie?"

Not really, but you don't know how to talk to him about it. You’ve been sharing a sleeping bag with Joel ever since yours was lost in a scuffle. Joel's is big enough for both of you, but barely. You’re settled in against him with your head on his bicep trying to get to sleep, but he was poking into you again, and it makes you ache. The feeling between your legs is so distracting, so overwhelming you can't sleep.

It seizes you and won’t let you relax, but you don’t know what to do about it. You’re a grown woman, of course you’ve tingled before, felt the warmth between your legs, thought about sex, hoped to have it one day. But this aching, throbbing feeling worries you. It’s so beyond anything you’ve ever felt before. It's extreme and sometimes it hurts. You worry something has happened to you from sleeping so rough, not having the right products people used to have for their periods.

The feeling is at its worst when his dick gets hard and presses up against you. That makes you suspect it's sexual. But you never learned how to get yourself off, and it's too late now.

"Um, yeah," you whisper. "I'm okay."

You squirm uncomfortably and dig a hand between your legs just to stay there.

"What's wrong honey?"

You sigh. "I just feel funny, that's all. You can't help. It's girl stuff."

"Now, hold on. Gimme some credit. I was a girl dad remember? You havin' cramps?" He gently rubs your lower belly, making the throbbing between your legs even worse.

"No, not like that," you groan.

He lifts his head up and gets more serious. "What's goin' on, sweetie? Where's it hurt?"

Your face burns as you start to try to tell him. "In the front between my legs."

His breath hitches. "What's it feel like?"

"It just aches and tingles and feels like a lot of pressure."

He inhales deeply. "Anything else that goes with it?"

"I get wet," you say. "But I don't think it's like normal. This is really a lot, and I'm afraid something's wrong."

He's quiet for a moment. "Nothin's wrong with you, baby," he murmurs. "Imma try somethin', okay? Tell me if this makes it worse or better."

"Okay." You're desperate. Plus, you've been traveling with him for weeks and you're past the point of modesty.

He nestles in behind you and grinds his hard cock into your ass. "Worse or better?"

"Worse, worse."

"Okay, now we know what the problem is. It's just tension, baby. Built up pressure. Your body's reactin' to mine."

"Okay. . ."

"Just gotta relieve that pressure. It's okay, we all do it. I can give ya some space if ya want"

Your heart rate speeds up. He must assume you know how. "I don't do that," you whisper.

"Ya gotta. Not gonna go away on its own, sweetie."

"I never figured out how. maybe something's wrong with me"

"Nothin's wrong with ya sweetie." He's quiet for a moment then he strokes your abdomen reassuringly. His hand finds yours between your legs. "Want some help?" He asks.

"Um, alright."

You move your hand out of the way and Joel's replaces it, first feeling you over your underwear. He whistles silently when he feels how wet you are. Then he slides his hand into your waistband. "This okay?"

"Yeah."

He backs up and urges you to lie down flat on your back. His hand wedges between your thighs and you move them apart, making space. He watches you watch his hand. He bypasses your clit to wetten his fingers with your arousal. "This okay?" He asks and you nod.

His middle finger prods at your entrance "can I go in?" You nod again.

He scoots up and presses his hard cock into your hip as he swirls his finger, then inserts it to the first knuckle and your mouth falls open with the intrusion. "Real tight," he mutters.

"What's that mean?"

"Nothin', baby."

He proceeds to insert his whole finger, then adds another. He slides his fingers through your folds then finds your clit and begins to rub wet circles. "Tell me when it feels right," he says.

He tries a few angles, speeds, and techniques until one really hits the spot and you say "that."

"Good girl."

He rubs you just how you like. "Now if you wanna touch your nipple or somethin', sometimes that helps, too."

You slide a hand under your shirt and lightly caress your breast. You feel your lower belly heating up, you're getting more tense but also feeling so good with his hand between your legs. He grinds himself into you as he fingers you and watches your spine begin to arch.

"Come on, sweetie. Let it happen."

You whine from the pressure. "Joel, I - I don't know how"

"Sure ya do, baby just let go, let it happen," his voice is soothing and low.

You whine again and pinch your eyes shut.

"I know baby, you're almost there;"

A few more strokes and you see stars. You ride massive waves of pleasure and relief. It feels so good you cry.

"Shhh, it's okay, baby. I got you." He caresses your face. "You're okay, I got you, sweetie." He presses a kiss to your temple.

SEQUEL: Thoughts

Thank you so much for reading. I always love your comments 🥹🙏

If you're into innocent readers, there's more where this came from. . . My ongoing series Left in Lincoln has an innocent, naive, virgin reader. And my master list has a virgin section lol.

All Joel: @ethanhoewke @silkiers @eiviea @evyiione @xdaddysprincessxx @queerly-anxious @chernayawidow @ambassadortotrilliusprime @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @jasminespringtime @romanarose @fandomsfallnomore @djarinxore @lokanda @blackvelveteen1339 @manazo @wolvesandvampires @taeslarityy @str84pedro @kyloispunk @filthfairy @fieryglutenfreechickennoodles @harriedandharassed @moonlightdivine @worhols @fan-fiction-floozy @cutesyscreenname @weddingfairy @pedropascal-whore @spideysimpossiblegirl

#joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller drabble #joel miller fic #pedro pascal fic #perv!joel miller #dark!joel miller #pedro pascal #pervy!joel miller #pedro pascal smut #toxicanonymity ☠️

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shaguro · 6 months

Text

a/n: thank you guys for all the love! and thank you for 50 followers!! i literally made this account a few days ago and i never expected this growth so quickly. i have so many ideas and i can't wait to share them with y'all. 😘

ony won the poll! so this is just porn with no plot, just onya giving you some good dick. word count's around 750, so ima put it under a read more, enjoy. ❤️

onyankopon always knew he was gonna make you his. sure, it would take some time but for you he was willing to wait. ony was determined like that, whatever he wanted he got it. you could even call it cocky, but that cockiness is what got you in his bed, ass up face down as he bullied his long dick into you. you were moaning in pure ecstasy, clawing at the satin sheets as tears streamed down your face. it was all too much; the tight grip he had on your frontal, head thrown back, the stinging imprint his hand left on the fat flesh of your ass. he was fucking you so deep you swore you could feel him in your stomach. your pussy was so tight, gummy walls sucking his dick back in with every rock of his hips. he let out a low groan, in love with how fucking good you felt.

“d-daddy, ohmygod... s’too big, i can’t-”

ony kissed his teeth as you tried to run away, hands gripping your hips so he could pound into you mercilessly. “uh-uh, you gon take all this dick. you had all that mouth, right? take it.”

your face was now pressed into the sheets, too weak and fucked out to keep your head upright. ony loved the fact that he could do this to you, have you so dumb over his dick that you’re just letting him have his way with you. voice hoarse from all the moaning you been doing, drool pooling from the side of your mouth, he had you right where he wanted you.

“i’m s-sorry, ahh, so sorryy.” reaching your hand to grip his arm, ony pushing it out his way.

“what i tell you, lil girl?” he pushes his palm on your back, watching it curve exactly how he wanted it. “take this fuckin’ dick.”

ony was no minute man but fuck, he knew he couldn’t last much longer. now he understood why you kept this pretty pussy from him, this had to be voodoo. shit didn’t make no sense, how your cream was forming a white ring around the base of his big dick, coating his toned abs, wet squelching sounds from your pussy bouncing off the walls, driving him wild.

ony tipped his chin to the ceiling, panting heavily. “fuck ma.” a hand circled your neck, applying pressure. “this pussy so good. this my pussy, right? all mine?”

you nodded frantically and ony’s hand cupped your jaw, leaning his body against yours so he could growl in your ear. “use your words.”

“oohyesyesyes it’s all yours—‘m gonna cum!”

“hold it.” ony muttered before he props one on his legs on the bed, fingers digging crescents into your hips, dick digging deeper in your guts than before. hitting that sweet spot over and over that had you blubbering, eyes rolling and your mind going blank. the force of his thrusts making your juices drip down his balls, creating a mess beneath you. using the last of your strength, you look at him over your shoulder with lust-blown eyes. “p-please let me cum, please.”

how could he say no to that pretty face? he decided he’d go easy on you this one time. ony bit his lip, feeling his own orgasm approaching. “cum all over this dick, baby.”

he didn’t stop stroking as your body trembled, the intensity of your orgasm had you seeing stars, leaving you completely limp on the bed, all your cum trickling down your thick thighs. your lower body still being held up in ony’s strong hands, you know you’ll have bruises from his tight grip. ony could only stroke one, two more times before his body stilled, filling you up with his seed. it was so much that it started dripping out of your puffy pussy, adding to the mess under you.

he could only smile when your eyes softly fluttered, fighting sleep as he gently wiped your tears with his thumb before he went into the bathroom to get a warm rag and start the bath water. coming back into the room, he starts wiping your worn-out hole, whispering apologies when you flinched from overstimulation.

“so good for me, mama.” he pressed a kiss to your temple, pulling back to see the damage he did on your frontal, lifting the lace. you kiss your teeth and swat his hand away. “i hate you. i just got this shit done!”

ony rolled his eyes. “you didn’t hate me when i had you creaming all over this dick.”

you cut your eyes at him and he laughs, playfully smacking your ass. “don’t worry mama. i’ll pay for another install and buy a new wig, whatever you want.”

“yeah, you better, nigga—”

you squealed when ony lifted you bridal style, telling you to watch your mouth as he walked into the bathroom and settled you into the bubbly water, fitting himself in the space behind you, arms wrapped around your waist. he littered kisses along your jaw and admired your pretty face as you snuggled into him, eyes slowly closing.

ony always knew that he would make you his and he always got what he wanted...but this? this was better than anything he could’ve imagined.

#aot x black reader #aot smut #ony x black reader #onyankopon smut #connie x black reader #aot x reader #aot onyankopon #attack on titan #shanti's stories⋆˙⟡♡

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