louudthoughts - Tumblr blog

louudthoughts · 2 hours

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I awoke

To tender messages from you

Left unread on my phone

How you wish to trace my shape

And hold me close

I jolt back to life for real

Without a word from you

Let me slip back into that dream

Where it was you waiting on me

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louudthoughts · 3 days

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no one knows how violent my mind is.

#feelings #spilled ink #emotions #lonely thoughts #numb #personal #sorry for being depressing #i hate it here #tw sui ideation #tw depressing thoughts #tw depressing stuff #tw death #cutt1ng #tw self h4rm #tw self destruction

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louudthoughts · 3 days

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i smile. when im around you. when i think of you. when i hear your name. when i reminisce. when i look up at the night sky and think of you.

you make me smile.

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louudthoughts · 3 days

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don't just look at me, see me.

#feelings #spilled ink #emotions #lonely thoughts #numb #personal #sorry for being depressing #writers and poets #i hate it here #tw depressing thoughts #depressing shit #tw depressing stuff #depressiv

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louudthoughts · 3 days

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walk in when im taking my last breath,

just so i can die in your arms.

#feelings #spilled ink #emotions #lonely thoughts #numb #personal #sorry for being depressing #tw depressing thoughts #depressing shit #tw depressing stuff #depressiv #tw sui ideation #tw death #self h@rm #vent #venting #bpd vent #bpd thoughts

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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even if it's when i fall asleep at night.

i hope and pray and wish to dream of you.

to see your face and the life i've planned for us,

even if it's all in my head.

" If I can't have you in this lifetime

Then I will wait for you in another"

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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Suffering at night

Is a different kind of suffering.

Pain wraps its cold fingers

Around your neck

And slowly,

Slowly,

Squeezes the life out of you.

It makes you wish

For better days.

It whispers

That they might come,

While slowly,

Slowly,

Squeezing.

Killing you

While

Drunk on hope.

— midnight killer

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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what would you do if you find out how i cope?

hug me, comfort me, hold me, whisper in my ear

telling me the things i desperately need to hear?

or is that just me and my wishful thinking

#feelings #spilled ink #emotions #lonely thoughts #numb #personal #sorry for being depressing #poetry #writers and poets #tw depressing thoughts #depressing shit #tw depressing stuff #depressiv #i hate it here #i'm sorry #why do i even bother #why am i like this

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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the moment i need a hug the most, you start to yell at me.

#feelings #spilled ink #emotions #lonely thoughts #numb #personal #sorry for being depressing #tw depressing thoughts #depressing shit #tw depressing stuff #depressiv #i'm not okay #send help #female writers #i hate it here #i hate this #emotional #anger

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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death by my own hand.

I got death in my pocket

#sorry for being depressing #sorry mom #tw depressing thoughts #depressing shit #tw depressing stuff #depressiv #i hate it here

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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but now, you've forgotten about me

just like everyone else i've met.

there was a time when you cared, called, wrote.

#feelings #spilled ink #emotions #lonely thoughts #numb #personal #sorry for being depressing #tw depressing thoughts #depressing shit #tw depressing stuff #depressiv #i hate it here #actually bpd #bpd thoughts #bpd #bpd vent

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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you remind me of the stars.

at first, i didn't know why,

but now i have found it.

stars are bright beacons of hope.

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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or have i already met him

and he's just not the one for me?

will i ever find the yin to my yang

ever meet my soulmate

or forever sit here

wishing to disappear

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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you were good to me you cared for me i ended my nights with your voice on the phone and started my mornings with a text from you

the second i leave i miss you you say the same back but i do not think you will ever feel what my heart feels for you

i never knew two humans in love could fall apart simply because one loves harder and the other could not love stronger

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louudthoughts · 4 days

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...and i've fallen back in love with you.

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louudthoughts · 6 days

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i walked down the driveway,

thinking of all the ways i could kill myself.

i know it sounds crass, but there were so many options. so many ways to imagine. and once you let yourself think of them, the ideas never leave.

i felt so numb.

and then i thought of you, lying in your casket, buried six feet below the ground i stand on. i thought of your family's weeping souls and all the people who cried at your funeral. i thought of how you wanted to live to help people.

and suddenly i wanted to live.

for you.

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louudthoughts · 6 days

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i am drowning in every one else's tears.

i am drowning in the tears i cannot express.

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